#ive started WRITING the fic too
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I talked about writing a MutantMayhem!Leo x Yuichi fic as a joke but I don't think it's a joke anymore
#mint.txt#leoichi would be their name right???#I've created a plot outline for them#ive started WRITING the fic too#this is a cry for heLP#what was supposed to be a crackship has me kind of on a chokehold#latbd.txt
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In regards to the whole soul mate thing, Soap's been through all the phases.
He'd started curious, then confused, then mournful, then resentful. For now he's settled somewhere in the vicinity of apathyāmaybe spite.
He doesn't have a soul-mark. Never has, never will, and that's... fine. He's far from the only one lacking that kind of connection, and that's enough for him to feel understood. Not alone. He's got plenty of good friends besidesāwith and without soulmates of their ownāand he's happy that way. Really, he is; it took him a fair amount of work to get to a place where he could say that and it not be wishful thinking. He's got friends, family, dalliances, motion and company and light in his life despite the lack of a mark that tells him where his place is.
And then he meets Ghost.
The Lieutenant is huge in the sense that his presence alone takes up what space his height and muscle can't. He's quiet, too, at least before Soap makes the effort to worm his way under all that tacgear. (The man is intriguing, what can he say? Who else walks around with a honest-to-fuck skull mask day in and out.)
Ghost seems to tolerate him at first, then inexplicably starts to prickle and grouch whenever Soap comes within six feet of him. He could make up a few reasons for why that is, but instead contents himself with pretending he doesn't noticeāpushing the implied boundary until Ghost mans up and tells him off.
He never does, though. And it's not long at all until Soap's found that the boundary has given way and Ghost isāwell he's actually pretty pleasant to be around. He's funny, and patient, and gives way too much of a shit to be in a career that pretty much ensures the death of everyone he works with. (He likes to pretend he doesn't, but there's no other reason he would have been waiting up in that church for Soapāin fact he shouldn't have still been there at all, since he'd already scoped an escape route. The bastard's soft, is what he's saying.)
And that's when things start to backslide just a little.
They're sitting in the messāonly three of them, the Captain unable to grace them with his presenceāand Gaz is talking about his sister's husband's new boyfriend being the result of a late-discovery soulmatch.
"Could you imagine," he says, pausing to chew his mouthful before he continues. "Going thirty years knowing there's someone out there for you, and not seeing them until after you're already married?"
"Could be platonic," Soap pointed out, not bothering with the same courtesy of chewing his food. Ghost kicks him under the table for it, but he honestly can't be asked to care for only three words worth.
"Could be, but stillācould you imagine?"
"Nope." Soap pops the 'P' and grins. Ghost doesn't kick him this time since he hasn't taken another bite yet. "I'm a wee bit hopeless in that department."
"Ah, brother." Gaz reaches out and they clasp hands for a moment, then he nudges his shoulder. "You and me both. Never much got the fuss about it, but that does seem like some sort of cosmic irony yeah?"
"Issat irony?" Soap asks. "Don't think that's right."
Obviously, that incites a short argument that ends when Gaz pulls out his phone to look up the actual dictionary definition of 'irony', and Soap grasps to change the topic to literally anything else to avoid Gaz gloating on the off chance that he's right.
"Lt, what about you?"
Ghost blinks at him as if he hasn't been staring at the both of them through the whole conversation.
"I know what irony is, Johnny."
"Noā" he can't help the scowl, and talks over Gaz's sudden jeering as he shoves his phone under his nose. Soap lifts his chin to avoid it. "You got a soul mark?"
"Read it and weep, Soap!" Gaz cheers, only slightly subdued in respect for every else in the room.
"I do." Ghost says at the same time, dipping his head in a tiny little nod, and Soap's world ends just a little bit, right there in the mess hall. Curls up, withers, and dies without so much as a squeal.
He's not able to ask if Ghost knows who it is, or if he's met them, or if they're still alive, or if it's romantic or platonic; he's not sure if it even matters, because Johhny knows right then that he will never be as close to Ghost as they are.
And it hurts.
It hurts in a way he wasn't entirely expecting.
He must hold it together well enough through the rest of dinner, and then through walking with Gaz back to their rooms, but once he's got the door locked behind him he feels the smile fall off his face. He sits down on the edge of his bed.
Ghost has a soulmate.
Ghost has a soulmate and Soap is pissed about it. Because that soulmate isn't himāit can't be, since he doesn't have a mark of his own.
It's justāit's unfair. They work so well together, on the field and off. He knows for a fact no one else can read Ghost as well as he can, no one else talks to him like he does, he doesn't hang around anyone else like he seems to hang around Soap. If anyone should be Ghost's soulmate, it should be him.
But he's not. Which means there's someone else out there that can watch his six better, understand him more, have more satisfying conversationsāand it seems fucking impossible, because he doesn't even know how it could get better given the time they've known eachother... and yet.
And yet Ghost has a mark, and Soap doesn't.
It takes him days to get over itāat least enough to act himself when he's in company. Ghost tries to get him to talk about it three separate times before he can manage to get his shit together. He won't *lie* to Simon, nor is he about to admit to what's eating at him, and it leaves him snappish. Leaves the vitriol closer to the surface than it ever has been around Ghost and he hates to see how he reacts to it; he doesn't cower, doesn't flinch, doesn't avoid him, just staresāin a different way than before. John's temper will flare and Ghost will freeze a little, tilt his head, furrow his brow, and fucking stare at him until the moment passes. It might be better if he raised his voice in return, let it escalate into a proper fightāor even if he shut Soap down hard and told him to cool off. Instead Ghost looks at him like he's gone and become a stranger; like he's confused where he doesn't expect to be, and that hurts almost as much as finding out his place isn't next to Simonāor at least, he doesn't have any rightful claim to it.
#siiigh. fuck it. *starts posting my wips*#i have like 35 of em thats gotta be something right#so far ive mostly just been bothering rune about fic ideas too so. LOL.#hes already seen all these probs#anw#fic wip#wip.txt#soapghost#ghostsoap#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#uhh sorrt about the hurt/no comfort folks i did not get to writing the comfort part yet LOL#cod:mwii#soapghost fic#soulmate au#i will refrain from tagging this like an ao3 upload#youre welcome#notes-app-clutter.zip
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The coffin lands with a crash, Nandor already out of it gracefully as his vampiric nature grants him.
āHave you survived the fall Guillermo, are you allright?ā he asks haughtily and with a barely concealed predatory grin at the yelping heap of limbs and clothes that is Guillermo right now. Of course he was never truly worried for his well being, Guillermo might be human, but he is no regular human, if his van Helsing blood has anything to say about that. Nandor just likes to tease.
āYes master, im fine, i just wasnt prepa-ā
Nandor offers him a hand out of the coffin, the way Guillermo has done so many times before for him. Nandor looks at him curiously, Guillermo looks all flustered right now, hes cute. Hes always cute of course, but damn. He hasnāt even realised the obvious parallel yet, just took his hand absent-mindedly as he was rambling about something. His hair is all mussed up too. Cute.
Probably the moment registers into Guillermoās mind as Nandor hears his muttering protests suddenly cut short. Heās looking at their gingerly intertwined hands and kinda looks like hes about to swallow a frog, or maybe like heās about to start crying again. This fucking guy. Always a theatrics with him. But Nandor has learned to lean into his little guyās moods. He leaves him to his maybe horny maybe emotional thoughts and finishes helping him out of the coffin.
The air is thick between them now. He can sort of hear Guillermoās heartbeat from this distance, the little guy probably has a concert thumping in his ears right now. Nandor enjoys playing with his food, always has, and today is no different. He takes a step closer. Guillermo takes an infinitesimal step back. There is a wall very close to his back. Right where Nandor wanted him.
āYou know as i was saying about the cameras, Guillermoā¦ā he starts feign-casual as he very not casually hovers over him, black eyes boring into him with the fire that only very rarely comes out in front of the crew. Guillermo looks like heās a mixture between disbelieving and like heās gonna pass out from hyperventilation at a moments notice. Itās an endearing mix.
āY-yes, you -were saying something about your hairā¦ā Guillermo couldnāt physically look away from Nandor if his life depended on it right now.
āAnd other reasonsā, very seriously.
ā- Yeahā, an exhale.
Just look at his eager little eyes. Should he put the guy out of his misery? Well come to think of it, should he put himself out of his own misery? Heās been in love with the guy for the better part of a decade now. Of course heās not about to say that now. Let him play the part of suave vampire for his Guillermo, let him fullfill any fantasy heās ever had, at the very least this very first time they do this dance. There will be time for the mushy stuff later. Come to think of it, what is Nandor doing?? Acting on years of pent up sexual and romantic tension, of course, but what is he setting himself up to? Heartbreak.
Violent, earth shattering heartbreak. Maybe not today, maybe not in 10 years, but soon. Soon to a vampire anyway. No- you donāt know that. If Guillermo loves me, he might find a way to not leave me like he always does. He always does leave. But then he also always comes back. Doesnāt he? Nandor loses himself in these thoughts for a moment, and Guillermo seems to notice his mind is suddenly somewhere else.
Oh, to be known so completely. Oh, to have a worthy partner, a partner who knows everything about you, a Lazlo to your Nadja, a Charmaine to your Sean, a Sire to your Baron. And to have to lose it in a matter of years. Just his luck. But also like Colin Robinson said, dont be sad cause its over, smile cause it happened.
Nandorās eyes keep searching Guillermoās as he draws closer and closer, eyes intensely registering every microexpression on his belovedās face, the little crinkle between his brows and the small nervous smile thatās forming around his lips. His hands land seamlessly and delicately on either side of Guillermoās face, and he feels his breath hitch. He really doesnāt give a flying fuck if heās gonna suffer for a thousand years, Guillermo is here right now and he looks like heās gonna break under his touch. One hand goes to cradle his head, thumb delicately swiping over Guillermoās ear and pulse point, as Nandor brings their noses together and they breathe the same air for a moment. The other hand is held gently across his cheek, just there, a reassuring weight. āIām going to kiss you nowā.
And Nandor kisses him.
#ive never written as much as a paragraph all my life. english aint even my first language#and wwdits out here making me write fanfic bc of their damn open endings FUCK and im sorry if this reads horribly#i was just /imagining/#i write from nandors pov bc i am him and also bc hes way too much fun#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#nandermo#fanfic#i guess???#does this qualify as fix it fic? lmao#nandermo fanfic#nandermo fic#wwdits spoilers#wwdits finale#*#mine*#some messy liveblog tag#again sorry about my shitty writing lmao but this has everything i love about them#of course i couldnt get much further from my initial idea; but once nandor kisses guillermo- he starts rambling about how much he loves him#of course. he could never kiss guillermo and not tell him hes got his heart and his soul lmao#after that - and after a good amount of kissing - guillermo is emboldened and gets all dommy and nandor fucking cries with glee#his dream come true dom guillermo is ordering him around and he wants to suck that dick so damn bad#he also sucks his neck a lot. maybe he will get ideas about nandor turning him into a vampire again#as they fuck there is also a bit of blood play of course. a bit of biting a bit of sucking blood its whatever#they may fuck that very evening or maybe another time- who knows#anyway. im sorry
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Uhuhu thinking about Ford comforting reader after they either found their partner's corpse or found out about their death, and him being so happy about the whole situation. You're clinging to him for comfort, your partner's out of the way, he made sure the murder could not be linked to him in any way, everything's going perfectly! Now he just needs to make sure his faƧade doesn't slip. You hating him wouldn't do either of you any good, but there's always the basement, if it comes to that... it will if you won't love him back.
yessssyesyyes yeysy ford def would this omg
he wants you to love him back and he knows that the process will be slow especially cuz ur grieving, but hes a freaking scientist. he can wait as long as he has to. heās slowly integrating into your life. at first, offering a comforting shoulder to cry on. next, heās coming over with food becuz āu have to eat, (y/n). u have to surviveā. then heās staying overnight to ākeep you safeā. he becomes a part of ur daily routine and practically ur husband.
heāll confess how much he likes you if he feels like youāve moved on enough (on average, people usually move on after a year, but since youāve had him he thinks ur good after like 4-6 months becuz hes a narcissist lol) and ur like wtf???? and genuinely feel so betrayed that this whole time fordās been acting like a friend to get in your pants.
āget out.ā ford stares at you.
āwhat?ā he blinks in confusion, āare you feeling alright, (y/n)?ā his eyes fill with pity and he reaches out to your shoulder. you smack his hand away.
āget. out.ā your eyes full with angry tears, ānow, stanford.ā you back away from him, turning away as you feel tears spill out. āi canāt believe youād do this to me.ā you choke.
ford tries to reach out to you, ā(y/n), please, i love you.ā
you shove him back, āGET. OUT. YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE.ā
ford stumbles. he turns away from you as he chokes out a teary, āfine.ā
ford, of course, does not give up. i mean, you need him! heās been looking after you for so long and he loves you so much :((. heās fr like tweaking out bro, pacing around the basement and chewing on his nails. like ong tweaking heās such a freak. then hes like āurethraš¤!ā and he comes up with an idea that ensures your safety forever :).
you wake up to hear your floorboards frantically creak. blearily, you try to look around to find the source of the noise. you rub your eyes, focusing on a man pacing in front of your bed. āā¦ford?ā he looks up, glasses crooked on his face.
āah, i didnāt mean to wake you.ā ford chuckles, sheepishly, āi was thinking.ā panic shoots through your veins as your brain registers the man in front of you. before you could open your mouth to scream, ford was next to your bed with a cloth covering your mouth and nose. he shushes you, ājust breathe in for me.ā you try to shake your head, but ford keeps your head in place with one hand. ābe good for me and breathe.ā
heās putting your ass in that basement!!!!
#minors dni#yandere#x reader#yandere x reader#gender neutral reader#kidnapping#stanford pines#yandere ford pines#ford pines x reader#stanford pines x reader#ive already started listening to christmas music#something to bring joy after the awful news on election day#im writing like 3 bruce wayne fics and a stubilly x reader too#also super depressed lol
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Me: just trying to read jason todd centric angst fic in peace
Tim drake 95% of the time: what if I made everything about meeeee I'm such a uwu abused neglected baby genius boy š„ŗš„ŗwho could do no wrong! See how I flinch and panic when Jason looks in my way!! Even though I'm supposed to be such a smart and tough badass robin worthy of my title unlike that stupid idiot 2nd robin who got himself killed and everything that ever happened to him was his fault because he beat me up one time and he disagreess with the almighty batman! :((((( I'm so terrified of him, but I'll forgive him, im so brave to face my "abuser." I'm such a good person who puts the mission first and emotion second, and B-b-b-because jason was my robin!! How could my inspiration betray me like this? im so insecure about my position as robin! I keep invading Jason's boundaries because I'm soooo smart! And that stupid idiot jason doesn't know. This is just how Bruce and I show love aren't such a good person with no flaws whatsoever? I may be born rich, but I'm the perfect philanthropist who has no internal biases against poor people and know the ins and outs of how to handle crime alley! I may even teach Jason something! Any good that ever happens to Jason is because of my interference , he should be forever grateful for having a brother like me and also forever guilty for beating me up one timeee, let's ignore the fact I fought back just as much and was conically still standing by the end. Jason should feel sooo guilty for existing in my presence that he feels obligated to cater to my emotional needs like a parent even though he's only three years older..I'll even guilt trip jason into taking care of Bruce's emotional needs because he's soooo sad and repressed his emotions! Even though Bruce and I never had a day in our lives where our needs were unable to be met and we never had a lack of support systems and jason spent spent his who childhood taking care of adults who should have been taking care of him. But I'm just so small and frail! I need taking care of and Bruce neglects me for that evil 9 year old, look at these brittle thin bones I'm so unhealthy and don't know how to take care of myself I need jason to do it even though I'm medically fit enough to be a vigilante and had enough support growing up to have access to good medical care and consistent nutrition. Oh, but i just don't know how to care for myself. I'm such a genius, but i can't figure out basic math like getting no sleep, and relying on coffee will lead to burnouts. I just want to keep going because I'm so loyal and noble. I can't waste a moment of time to save people! :))) look at all of these cutesy quirks I have no character development needed in fact all of my perceived character "flaws" are positive flaws or flaws that only negatively affect my uwu sad boy self rather than other characters or the plot!
#anti tim drake#sorry lol i had get this out#i would be less mad if i could escape it lol but no matter how many tags i put in the exclude section fanon tim uwu baby drake always ther#im pretty new to this fandom and ive only really read jason todd stuff so when i started reading fics i honest to god thought tim was a#5 years old#like sir what is wrong with you#just before writing this i was reasing a series of one shots that explore bruces abusive actions towards jason#in a way that batman got found out by jl and locked up. lolll so subsequently the batfam kids found out too#and there are multiple pages worth povs of tim Drake whining about how even if its abuse jason is still getting more attention from bruce#than him and i lost it. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU#and like again i cant escape this shit fanon tim always have to be involved istg GO SOMEWHERE#like usually when i dislike a character from the fandom this much i try to get to know their canon ver to soften the blow ig#but when these weird contradictory#arbitrary made up mary- sue-like interpretations of a character is so widespread like this#i tend to think the actual character fucking sucks and his popularity is due to something not related to his character#srsly what do yall like abt. him bcs all i got is. smart. victim blamer. upper class baby. and his parent were vaguely non available.#and a big emphasis on 'vaguely'#how is any of this compelling????????#i came to this fandom bcs of jason todd but i slowly started like the rest of the robins like dick. steph. and especially Damian#but more and more evryday i find another reason to hate this motherfucker#ugh
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yk what im thinking? the fentons are 100% crazy enough to be Waynes. so what if they were? Jack could be Thomas Waynes' great-grandfather's brother who lived at Wayne Manor with his wife and kids. and they still open the portal with danny in it, so hes still a halfa. but either Jack and Maddie find out and they stick him in a stasis tube to try and fix him (what if they were also the people who figured out how to make the court of owls dead guys????) or Danny got stuck in the portal when he went inside and it doesnt open until the bats find it.
when the bats find him im thinking either they know (as well as danny) that hes half dead (the stasis tube) or they dont (stuck in the portal) and they find out all the fun stuff together. but, if they know hes dead already and so did danny there could be more creepy ghost shenanigans that could happen before they found the laboratory. which is v important
#dp x dc prompt#fic prompt#danny phantom#batman#my writing#? ig#i have been trying to make art for this au for a while now#not working out#but omg ive been thinking abt it alot#also thinking vlad could be a vampire in this au that kinda hides away once the 'fentons' die#but he finds out that the waynes newest kid looks alot like danny#well hes back to his old home wecking weird ways#thinking it would also b neat if bruces perents haunted the wayne mannor too#and danny just casually picks up conversation with them#and bruce finds out or comes across it and is just like ...#wut#huh#h uh?#also that the fenton labritorys secret entrance is in the kitchen#so the food cooked in that kitchen has made a few people sick because of the ectoplasm posioning#and that danny haunted the manor before he was found too but he wasnt quite aware what he was doing and doesnt remeber much from doing it#but bruce remebers seeing a teenager sometimes when he was a kid before he died#and dannys room was boarded up after he 'died'#how the bats find him is when jason starts coming around the manor more it makes danny more aware so he starts doing creeping ghost shit#to try and get someone to find him in under the kitchen#the reason jason triggers him like this is cuz its another 'ghost' or lazarus water/ectoplasm type thing in his haunt#so it freaks him out#or the ectoplasm makes him more aware?
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(guy who still has studying and a writing final to do voice) finally. i can write fanfiction again
#the cryptid speaks#I MISS MY WRITING GUYS SO BAD#i need them for my mental health i think /hj#the only fic ive been writing for the past like month has been that clover - wind archer cookie one i had an idea for and started in a fit#all my other free time has been spent writing code or writing for my eng class#and i like those things too but my guys. i need my guys#i Really need to return to lucky jumbo (they call for me. yearning. they have 2 active WIPs)#but honestly prophet luke death might win#i also mentally wrote a whole opening to my next bf fic this morning in the shower so maybe i should put that to digital paper
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how many more bleedin wips could i possibly have oml .................
is any of this visible on a device thats not apple cus the colours aren't colouring
(and unfortunately theres more where this came from rip me ššš just sketching nonstop but not committing to colouring š)
#this is why its been taking me so long to finish writing#plus i intend to have accompanying art pieces for each fic i write#ive looked at these for too long i am starting to hate it all#oh i forgot how patient you must be when you do any sort of creative endeavour#yes i was a gifted kid yes i am hard on myself why do you ask#sigh#is this even worth tagging lmao#dragon age#dragon age art#dragon age inquisition#dragon age veilguard#emmrich#emmrich volkarin#solas#solas x lavellan#dread wolf#fen'harel#fuck it why not#lavellan#inquisitor lavellan#dai#datv#dav#dragon age the veilguard#da: inquisition#solas x inquisitor#emmrich hand practice yes...............................#i need to do a solas study ...............................................#hhhngghgnghghhhhh#its thanksgiving and im in europe so im going to order fried chicken in the spirit of bounty and gratitude
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zl fic idea
hii everyone i wrote something yesterday about an au idea i had for zolu and. i thought i'd share it here since its a bit too messy and disjointed in places to post on like. ao3 or something.
4.7k words, warning for temporary major character death but do not worry all will be fixed in due time. i'll put the rest under the cut
ok i have an idea for an au thats like kind of reincarnation but like reality displacement but like. okay just listen.
so we start at laughtale. its a couple years into the future from where we are in canon the strawhats are achieving their dreams luffy is about to find the one piece theres a big battle happening between them and the blackbeard pirates and whoever the fuck else is there idc. the rest of the strawhats are fighting the bb crew while luffy and zoro head off to find the one piece and also end up fighting black beard himself. luffy and zoro atp r like basically a thing but they never talk about it cuz theyre luffy and zoro and they kind of just exist with each other but like. theyre basically in love and everyone knows it. anyway they go off together luffy has the one piece almost in his grasp blackbeard attacks they fight its a big battle blood is shed bones are broken uumm in my mind luffy and zoro are like teaming up against bb bc his devil fruit is lowk broken and op and like ok theres gear5 too but i didnt rly consider that so lets just assume bbās devil fruit can negate gear5 somehow or luffy exhausts it before bb is fully defeated.Ā
finally theyre able to knock bb down and hes out and theyre both tired and worn but they DID IT and the one piece is luffys and theyre facing each other grinning ear to ear and zoros saying āyou ready, king of the pirates?ā and luffy laughs and goes ānot just yet zoro, i still gotta-ā and then theres a spear piercing right through his chest. and in the next moment its gone.Ā
theres a gaping hole through his captain and theres blood, theres so much blood and luffyās still smiling like he hasnt realized it yet, like it hasnt even registered. zoros ears are ringing and he doesnt know what to make of whats hes seeing because its just not real, it CANT be.Ā
he looks over luffyās shoulder and blackbeard is on the ground with his hand outstretched , black energy coiling back into his form and heās laughing and laughing with bloodstained teeth. hes fucking laughing. one moment zoro is still standing parallel to luffy and the next hes in front of blackbeard and the mans head is rolling through the dirt and gravel, wado dripping crimson, a terrible gap toothed grin still stretching the manās cheeks.Ā
zoro is breathing heavy, hes trembling and hes almost mesmerized by the blood pooling around a lacerated neckā then heās remembering luffy and turning around and calling his name and he can see right through him theres a HOLE right through him and he chokes and stumbles and rushes to his side right as luffy starts to crumple to the floor . catches him and lowers him gently and doesnt know what to say.Ā
hes still shaking but cant move his mouth and everything is muffled, the sounds from the battle outside are distant and they dont matter but what does he do. what does he do.Ā
he snaps out of it when luffy gently calls his name. a strong āzoro,ā like hes not fazed at all. like there isnt blood soaking into zoros clothes.Ā
his brain kickstarts and heās speaking. saying things like āyoure ok youāll be okā and āchoppers right outside iāll just call him and heāll fix you right upā and āyou always bounce back, right captain?ā and hes thinking ādont die please dont fucking die. not now, not when weāre this close please dont fucking dieā and hes silently praying to all the gods he doesnt believe in but luffy calls his name again and his mouth clicks shut. luffys saying itāll be fine, that he had fun. that hes proud to have made it this far with all of them. and those sound a lot like parting words so zoroās shaking his head no but luffy is still smiling. hes saying that hes glad he had zoro, that he made him happy. hes saying to tell everyone heās glad they met, that hes glad they all had each other, that he knows theyll be just fine .Ā
zoro wants to say that luffy should tell that to them himself, when hes wrapped up and recovering and alive but his mouth is glued shut again and he feels that interrupting luffy now would be cursing him to death, like his words are the only thing keeping him tethered here, he just needs to get him to keep talking to stay awake.Ā
he tries to smile but it comes out ugly and wrong and he feels his lip wobble so he drops it. he settles on rubbing his thumb on luffys shoulder. something to keep him here.Ā
so he rubs and luffy talks little things until he cant anymore. until his eyes grow dull and his skin loses its warmth and still zoro rubs and he rubs.
ā
thats how law finds them. zoro hunched over a body that should never be as still as it is. and its really no surprise hes there, hes been gunning for the one piece since the time he could captain a ship (or a submarine) but it all feels so wrong.Ā
zoro either doesnt notice him or doesnt care, but either way the man doesnt acknowledge law until heās right behind him. its not like law can say anything to announce himself either, not after seeing the state of the body that zoros currently holding. the body that used to be luffyās. hes still processing it all when the other man(the one whos alive) finally speaks.Ā
zoro asks if hes got a devil fruit. less of a question and more of a statement, but he should know anyway since theyve spent considerable time together and hes literally seen him use it. law cant unstick his jaw so he hums in affirmation. āand you can switch stuffsā places?ā another hum. āwhat about time.āĀ
that makes law pause. āwhat?ā his voice comes out stronger than he feels.Ā
āwhat about time? can you switch things in time?ā by this point law has awakened his devil fruit or some shit dont sweat the logistics but hes never tried anything of that sort so he kind of stumbles āim not- maybe? ive never attempted-ā zoro interrupts āsend me backāĀ
āwhat?āĀ
āsend me back so i can fix this. you can do that, right.ā it clicks. law would pity zoro if he didnt know any better, instead he just feels mounting despair and resignation.Ā
he may not be crew, but he knew luffy too, he was allied with the man for fucks sake, and this just feels- wrong. he sighs, a tired, heavy thing.Ā
āwhat about your crew?ā its useless. zoros as stubborn as his captain, with arguably a handful more screws loose. āit wont matter. theyāll never know because iāll make sure this doesnt happen.ā he still hasnt turned around. law doesnt know what expression hes making and hes sure he never wants to find out.Ā
hes ready to deny it, cut his losses and head for the one piece himself (hes not heartless, but if he stands here any longer and has to look at. well. he think he might never be able to move again) but then he really thinks about it. could he? would it even be possible? surely this isnt the way things were supposed to go, surely this isnt right. luffys never been one who was supposed to die just like that, like this, law knows that much. he thinks hes going to regret this, but he counts it as one last thank you for everything luffy did for him.Ā
youre gonna owe me big time strawhat-ya. if i even remember this, that is.Ā
he puffs a breath āi can try. i cant- promise anything but. i think we both know this,ā he makes a vague, weak gesture, āisnt right.āĀ
zoro doesnt say anything, law didnt expect him to. he just bows his head slightly and law takes that as the acknowledgment it is.Ā
he brings his hand up, ādont do anything stupid, zoro-ya. or, at least, make it stupid enough to bring him back.āĀ
he positions his fingers in way so familiar, but the weight of it now is nearly unbearable.
room.
shambles
ā
zoroās world shatters, differently than before, and then theres nothing.
ā
he wakes up in bed, bleary eyed and a pounding headache assaulting his senses. his alarm clock is going off which only adds to the drumbeat against his eyes. he grumbles and whacks around aimlessly to shut it off. the silence lasts a moment before his eyes fly open and he jolts up, sheets pooling around his waist. luffy. where was he? where was zoro? did the crew find him and take him back to the ship? did law fail? but this didnt look like chopperās office.
he looks around to find hes in a room hes never seen before in his life, yet he instinctively knows is his. it all feels so wrong, like he doesnt belong in his own skin. he scratches lightly at his arm. he needs to go to work.Ā
work?
what the fuck is happening.Ā
its like his mind is at war with itself, one truth trying to dominate over the other. he trained at senseiās dojo. he aged out of foster care. he was a swordsman, he was the first mate of the strawhat pirates. he didnt go to college, hes working construction. he made a promise, and kuina died. kuinaā¦died. huh. his captain, his luffy, someone he knew so intimately and who knew him in turn. hes never met someone with that name his entire life. he needs to go to work, he needs to find his crew.Ā
he doesnāt understand what the fuck is happening.Ā
without his permission his legs stand him right up and he moves confusedly, surely, to the bathroom he didnt know he had. his reflection stares back at him in the mirror and its him, of course it is, he doesnt know why he expected someone else, but hes alsoā¦different. he has both function of his eyes, first of all. a scar in the same place as before but its light and healed over and doesnt seem to have blinded him like it once did. his hair is green, sure, but black roots peek out from underneath the familiar shade. hes grown stubble, he should shave. he needs to go to work.Ā
hes so confused, but his body moves like its been doing this its whole life. as far as zoro knows, it has.Ā
he continues getting ready, mind still at odds, and makes himself a cup of coffee (in his own kitchen. his own kitchen? the state of it leaves less to be desired. sanji would surely skin him alive) before tucking into his shoes, grabbing his wallet and keys and heading out the door. he seems to live in a single room apartment, and a crummy one at that. his legs move him faster, he has to go to work, he cant be late again (again?).
his car is parked outside the building, he has no fucking clue what it is but he unlocks it all the same and settles in. he feels like he shouldnt be operating this sort of machinery. franky would know better than him how it must work. he starts it up and backs out. trusting his gut to get him where he needs to be. he should be more concerned, he should be frantic and inconsolable, his captain was dead in his arms and now hes? what? going to lay some bricks or some shit? but he finds that part of him dulled in favor of following whatever mundanity this body is pushing him towards.Ā
uumm whatever whatever he arrives at work eventually i dont know how construction jobs work are there offices or something. idc thats not the point. johnny and yosaku are there and zoro is surprised to see them since, as far as he knows, the last time they were with each other was at arlong park which was years ago for him. but the two greet him like this is a daily occurence, like theyve been working together for years. and zoro thinks, knows, they must have. but this is good, this is great fucking news actually because until now theres been no confirmation if zoro was here alone (wherever āhereā is) but now his proof is right in front of him because if johnny and yosaku are here, and they exist the same as from before, then that must mean everyone else is here too right? he clings onto this hope with both hands trembling.Ā
nami, usopp, the cook and chopper and robin and franky, brook, jinbe and fuck. fuck, luffy. theyve got to be here somewhere, zoro just has to find them. hes not sure if they remember things like he does but hes got to try because they are his as much as he has always been theirs and they should all exist together as it has always been.Ā
so then yeah he finishes his shift because its what hes āsupposedā to do but he doesnt go home. he drives around aimlessly before pulling into a random lot and pulling out his phone (theres no snail attached to it. weird.) he doesnt even know where to begin. hes not usually the one coming up with plans, he just goes where theres blood need to be shed. but no one seems to be in any danger here except for maybe himself, and its not like he has his swords anyway- shit. fuck did he still have wado? he must have right? he knows there was a kuina that existed here too, he knows because he remembers. and she, well she wasnt around anymore so he must have wado. he must. with shaking fingers he pushes that aside for now, though barely. he needs to find luffy, but he wouldnt even know where to start. luffy could probably find the rest of their crew by simply wandering around and happening upon them, thats how he did it before. but zoro has no idea where heād be, he doesnt even know where he is. nami or robin would be a good bet to at least form a plan, but he wouldnt know how to find them either.Ā
is there even a coco village here? would robin still be part of baroque works? he needs someone who has a defined location that he could google or something (what the hell is google?). usopp would be at syrup village right? shit. is there even a drum island? these are all too broad, he needs something specific. specificā¦..a place with an identifiable name, somewhere smaller that would be easier to stake outā¦
a lightbulb goes off.Ā
fucking shit he thinks. of course. of fucking course it would come down to the cook.Ā
he types in ābaratieā to his maps and a location pops up, just 27 minutes from where he is now. he hasnt eaten yet either, so he figures thats killing two birds with one stone. he taps the address, backs out of the lot and drives.Ā
(if it takes him nearly an hour to get there thats nobodys business but his own)
he pulls up to the building about a quarter after 7. it seems packed enough already, but if memory serves him right then that was just par for the course for baratie. he parks, gets out and locks his car, then shoves his hands in his pocket and resigns himself to another oncoming migraine hes sure to get upon interacting with the man hes certain is waiting somewhere inside.Ā
the tables are full, the host tells him, he slips a 20 from his wallet and suddenly (of course) theyre more than willing to serve him.Ā
he gets settled in a far and somewhat isolated booth and a waiter comes up to him, but he cuts the man off as hes introducing himself and says āyou got a blonde working here? stupid ass side part with a weird eyebrow? goes by sanjiā the waiter looks shocked and put off by his rudeness but quickly collects himself and says āwe might. depends on whos askingā zoro snorts ājust tell him hes got someone who wants to talk to him,ā he cringes at this next part, tries to smile but knows it comes off as a sneer. hes not sure if he still has conquerors haki wherever he happens to be now, but he tries to channel that energy the same way he would if he were in battle and says ātell him im a fan.ā the waiters eyes widen, in fear or surprise zoros not sure (most likely a mix of both) before he nods and scurries across the floor, weaving in between patrons and coworkers alike until he disappears behind the double doors to the kitchen.Ā
zoro sits with his arms crossed and skims through the menu out of boredom and impatience. its a couple minutes before he sees a familiar head of blonde hair emerge from across the way. a smile climbs onto his face despite himself. sure, the guy annoyed him to hell and back and theirā¦friendship (if you could really call it that) was a tumultuous one, but it was good to see someone familiar nonetheless. he schools his expression before the blonde can spot him. a few moments pass before hes standing right in front of zoro, his stupid suit primped and pressed as always, and a cautious look on his face.Ā
āyou asked for me?ā his tone is the one he only reserves for men who he deems not worth his time. zoro grits his teeth but says āyeah, theres something ive gotta discuss with you.āĀ
hes never been one for tact, forever blunt unlike his swords.Ā
sanji quirks a brow āi dont plan on talking about anything with anyone unless theyre a paying customerā zoro feels his eyebrow twitch but grabs his menu nonetheless and points to a random item without looking āiāll have this then, and whatever booze you got.ā sanji leans in to see what hes pointing to before his one visible eye widens and a grin slowly overtakes his previously unaffected face.Ā
he speaks condescendingly. āwonderful choice sir, coming right up.ā before zoro can get another word in he grabs the menu out of his hand, spins on his heel, and marches back to the kitchen.Ā
zoro clenches his fists and does his best not to grind his teeth into a fine dust. no matter where they are or what displacement in time the fucking curly brow never fails to be absolutely insufferable. at least this way though, zoro knows its him for real.Ā
its another 20 minutes before the shit cook reemerges from the back with a platter and a mug in his hand. he steps up to zoros table and places the plate and cup down in front of him with a smug look. zoro has no idea what the fuck hes looking at on his plate. he doesnt have time to question it before sanji plops down in the booth seat across from him, disregarding all previous faux-professionale and asking āso what do you wantā zoro tears his eyes away from his plate and looks into sanjiās, trying to convey as much emotion, as much urgency as he possibly can.Ā
āluffy needs us. and we have to find himā whatever the cook was expecting him to say, it definitely wasnt that. the other man regards him more warily now, looking him up and down with a tense frown before replying āi dont know what the hell youre talking about. and i dont appreciate being mocked or having my time wastedā he goes to stand up but zoro grabs his wrist, yanking him back down unceremoniously.Ā
he blinks before rounding back on zoro, flaring his nostrils in a way zoro knows means hes about to get himself in deep shit āoi, what the fuck do you think youre-ā he doesnt let him finish āim not mocking you. this isnt some stupid prank or whatever youre thinking. and despite how much i would enjoy punching your teeth in right now im not looking for a fight either.āĀ
the cook still looks affronted but seems to actually be listening. zoro continues ālook, i dont know what the fuck is going on. i was at laughtale with you and the others, with luffy, and then i woke up and now im here and i dont know how but this is all wrong. its all wrong but i need to find luffy and fuck, i cant do it alone. i need your help to find him. find everyone.ā the blondes eye is wide, but he blinks and its gone. he looks more tired than zoro has ever seen himĀ
āim not paid enough for this shit. i dont know why i even-ā he looks like hes getting ready to leave again but zoro is desperate at this point so he blurts out whatever he thinks will convince the other man hes not bullshitting.
āwe met you here, at the baratie. me and nami and usopp and luffy. luffy busted through one of your walls so your old man punished him by making him wash dishes. i dont, i dont know what luffy said to you, or how he convinced you to join us, but he changed your life like he did mine. we sailed together, and we had each others backs no matter how much we got on each others nerves. you were our cook. i was our swordsman. luffy was our captain and youd do anything to help him, i know you would, same as me. youre a pervert and an asshole and a damn annoyance, but youre strong. i could still kick your ass thoughā if the cookās eyebrow could go any higher hes sure itd be clear off his forehead by now.Ā
āand you- your dream. you wanted to find the all blue.ā he stalls there, engine sputtering. zoro doesnt know what else to say, so he snaps his mouth shut.Ā
the blonde is still gaping at him like a fish, but he mouths the phrase āall blueā like hes been searching for it his whole life, like he always knew but just never had the words.Ā
he blinks.Ā
then he blinks again, rapidly. there are tears pooling in his eyes. his mouth flaps for a moment before he seems to finally be able to push out words.Ā
āyou- zoro?ā he sounds small. he sounds hopeful. zoro grins.Ā
āyeah, yeah its me.ā sanji stares at him a moment, then looks around, as if hes seeing everything with clear eyes for the very first time. zoro figures he might as well be.Ā
āholy shit. holy shit.āĀ
zoro laughs, a rough thing. theres a ball in his throat that he cant seem to dislodge. ānice to have you back, curly browā sanjiās gaze snaps back to him before he scowls and tries wiping away the tears that are now streaking down his cheeks. its useless though, it seems they cant stop. zoro laughs again at the sorry state of the asshole in front of him, this time more full and genuine. he feels so relieved he doesnt know what to do with himself.Ā
āyeah yeah, whatever dick head.ā sanji grumbles. zoro quiets down, glances away, lets him have his moment. āfuck, mosshead, im still on the clock and you unload all this on me? how the hell am i supposed to finish the rest of my shift?ā his words are sharp but he doesnt sound angry at all. in fact, when zoro turns back to look, hes smiling.Ā
āyou remember now though, dont you?ā he has to be sure.Ā
āwhat does it look like, dumbass? think im tearinā up cuz of pollen or some shit?ā the cook rolls his eye. theyre both silent for a moment, trapped in their own heads, before he speaks up again. āso, what now?ā zoro doesnt even have to think before he answers āwe find everyone else, obviously.ā āwell no shit, but how?ā zoro glances to the side. āi was hoping youd figure that outā sanji stares before bursting out laughing. zoro scowls and hunches into his shoulders.Ā
āof course!ā sanji cackles āof course your dumbass wouldnt know what to do! you probably just typed in the most recognizable place you could remember and hoped one of us would be there!ā zoro doesnāt answer, because yes thats what he fucking did, but it worked didnt it? he doesnt see whats so funny.Ā
āfuck you.āĀ
he wants nothing more than to bash that smarmy mouth in, but the familiar egging settles something in his soul. sanji gasps a few breaths before calming down, now wiping tears from his eyes for a completely different reason.Ā
āalright alright, well lets figure this out then, yeah? we figure out how we got here then we can figure out how to get back right? simple enoughāĀ
zoro nods, ālaw was-ā he stops. remembers dull eyes and clammy skin and wrong wrong wrong. he shakes his head, āno, no we cantā sanji looks at him confused.Ā
āwe cant go back,ā zoro presses, ānot until i fix things. i promised i wouldā the other man seems to pick up on his panic and his mood dampens, becomes more serious. āpromised what?āĀ
zoros never been one to sugarcoat, but now he wishes he could find a way to soften the blow hes about to deal. he inhales, pushes the breath out. says, āluffy died, sanji.ā the fact the hes actually using the other mans name seems to fly right over his head in favor of the first part. āwhat?ā zoro huffs, is he really gonna make him say it again? āluffy di-ā sanji interrupts, angry now, fists clenched and whitened from the pressure āi heard what you said. but what do you mean.āĀ
he doesnt want to have to tell sanji what happened, doesnt want to talk about it at all, wants to slice it up into small enough pieces that it very well may have never existed.
he told law the others wouldn't have to know, that he would make sure of it, but he's realizing now just how unrealistic that is. as much faith as zoro places in his own abilities, he's aware he's only one man.
and, he figures, if there's anyone i can trust enough to share a burden heavy as this with, might as well be the one who's strength i'd count on just as much as my own.
sanji cant help if he doesnt know what went down once they got separated at laughtale, so zoro sets his shoulders, clenches his fists, prepares himself like hes riding into a battle he knows he has no chance of winningāhes the first mate for fucks sakeāand resigns himself to filling the other man in on every horrible detail
by the end, the cook looks much the same as zoro feels, pale-faced and shaky. he runs a trembling hand through his hair and clenches his eye shut. āfuck mosshead, thatsā¦ā he doesnt bother finishing, and zoro stays silentāalready knowing just how much of a shitty situation it is that theyve found themselves in.
ā
(btw the reason sanji was so smug about what zoro randomly chose on the menu is bc its one of their most expensive dishes. even upon regaining his memories he still makes zoro pay it cuz hes an asshole like that. business is business š)
uuummm i dont feel like detailing the rest basically my idea is that they work together to try and track down all the members as well as law, since hes also a part of this. i dont know how or when or in what order but i do know finding luffy would come last. so yes its zolu but for a majority of it more in spirit than anything. maybe i can throw in some luffy pov of him living with ace and sabo . he knows something is off but cant place his finger on what. he knows something is missing but hes got his brothers with him so what else could he possibly need? etc etc. you get the idea
#devil fruits don't work like this but don't sweat the logistics. just read with your heart not your head#it starts off rough cause im kind of just rambling about my ideas then the more i go the more it just turns into a fic#let me know your thoughts in the comments or my inbox or whatever i love discussing stuff hehe!!#as you all know im an artist first and foremost but sometimes my ideas get a bit too big for my current drawing skills so i write them down#so heres that#one piece#zolu#theres no guarantee i'll ever like. srsly continue this but i rly rly like it as a concept im invested LOL#and i have a few ideas on how the rest of the crew would be found that ive discussed w friends#so perhaps if i find motivation and can outline. an actual plot progression and clean up this first part...#well who knows... XD#also im not a zs truther in fact my insta followers r well aware of my. certain feeling on the ship#HOWEEVVEERRR i do think zoro and sanji have such an interesting unique and important dynamic/relationship#that i enjoy studying outside of a romantic lens#anyway ive spoken enough . pls enjoy! or dont thats fine as well
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Penciled Lines
(Cross-posted on ao3, if you prefer to read it there. Reblogs still appreciated!)
Missa wakes up, and he thinks he might be doomed. This doesnāt scare him nearly as much as it should.
Missa is awake earlyāby his own metric, anyway. His nocturnal nature causes āearlyā for him to mean āearly nightā and not āearly morning.ā Regardless, āearlyā means that Philza is not asleep yet, still going through his nightly rituals. āEarlyā means that Philza is sitting up in (his? their?) the bed, pillows propped up behind him, notebook in his lap, sketching away.
And when Missa wakes up to the soft scritch-scratch of a charcoal pencil on textured paper, his forehead just so happens to be brushing Philzaās hip.
Missa can hardly breathe.
Oh no.
He knows that if he gives any indication that he is awake, Philza will stop sketching, close his notebook, shift himself over until he is politely seated on his side of the bed, and greet Missa with a friendly smile. Philza has done it before, when Missa wakes up early. Thatās how Missa knows heāll do it again.
Thus, Missa can hardly breatheāhis breaths have to be the slow in-out of sleep. He canāt so much as twitch, either. He has to keep quiet and play dead or else heāll be found out. Seen. Caught living the lie.
āHusband,ā Philza calls him. Theyāre not married. They share a bed. Theyāre hardly ever in it at the same time. They have a son and a daughter. Neither of them know Missa very well. Philza has had an extra set of armor and a skull on his backpack for months, waiting for Missa. Missa doesnāt even know Philzaās last name.
Philza is a good man and a good friendāand Missa doesn't deserve him. Still, he takes what he can get. Curls around it. Hoarding every innocent kindness Philza extends like a starving creature: the generosity of a backpack fully stocked with equipment; the trust Philza places in Missa to watch the kids when heās asleep; and now, the courtesy of not moving his hip from Missaās forehead to ensure his āsleepingā isnāt disturbed. Missa clutches all of these little offerings in his greedy claws and hugs them into his chest, even as the guilt eats away at him.
Because, regardless of the lack of mutual feeling, he loves Philza. He loves him so, so much, and that is why he is doomed. He canāt afford to lose what little he has. He canāt cross that line.Ā
So Missa lies beside Philza, forehead pressed against Philzaās hip, pretending to sleep so he can imagine that theyāre not just lying in bed together, but lying in bed, together; and later, when Missa truly wakes, he will sit on his side of the bed and look at Philzaās face soft with sleep and think about how lucky he is that he still has a side-of-the-bed to begin with.
Missa doesnāt mean to drift off. When it starts to happen, heās hopelessly torn between shaking himself awake and thus giving himself away, or remaining how he is, silently fending off the inevitable. In the end, Missa clings to that scritch-scratch sound of Philzaās pencil on the paper for as long as he can before the fog at last pulls him under.Ā
Eventually, he dreams. In fact, he dreams of the calloused fingers he dreams of every night, hands like his own, an artist of Death, cradling and shading the contours of his faceāa softness dashing charcoal across his jaw, and over his cheekbones, and perhaps on his lips, too, if heās lucky. Defining every edge of him.
~*~
A deep sigh. Phil stops sketching as Missa shifts in his sleep. He tilts his head up so that the tip of his nose is now just nearly brushing against Philās hip. The motion disturbs the wild splay of his dark hair, revealing more of his face: eyelashes, cheeks, warmth. Tender blush of something Stygian and otherworldly. New.
Philās lips tilt upwards. He turns to a fresh page, and he starts again.
#qsmp#pissa#qsmpshipping#qsmp missa#qsmp philza#i hesitate to put main character tags bc it's shipping content but i think we're all p much okay with that?? we chill??? we chill thumbsup#my fics#ficlet#anyway would you believe me if i told you this took me a week to write. hhourgh.#i'll prolly make small edits as time goes by if i dont scrap this version entirely.#i really like it rn but we'll see how i feel abt it in like a couple hours or a day. the sheer number of times ive rewritten this hhhhh.#this little character/relationship study is primarily for me to try to work them out in my head.#so if this doesnt quite hit the exact vibe you know why.#im still getting acquainted w missa's character but i gotta start somewhere ya know#i didnt actually get to explore missa's feelings of inferiority as much as i wanted to but thats bc i found trying to tackle that As Well-#-as everything else saddled the fic/setting w too many Things and made it cumbersome and muddied the story being told.#so another time perhaps.#anyway i adore them. beloveds.
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y'all made me realize there's still not a single tanfang first time fic on ao3 (which is actually crazy to me) and now I have to write it
#give me a few hours ive already started#fuck i have too many ongoing writing projects#including an angsty tan dies and fang has only a few chances to go back time and change the course of fate fic#that i REALLY want to get done before school starts in two weeks#but hey let's focus on some smut first why not#we are the series#tanfang
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āØokay everyone send me good vibes for me to write lots of words this weekendāØ
#ive got this weekend and next weekend to finish drafting this ch before i have to start working extra hours on my days off for our audit š©#word of advice for future fic writers....never set an expected number of povs in each ch cause then when 1 pov turns out to be 11k words#you still have to write the other 2 damn povs too š©
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This is a list of things that are quite frankly crazy:
fake dating amangela
amangela roadtrip
fuckboy!angela
there was only one bed
horny cottagecore
family reunion
impromptu singing!
drunk gay!!!!
aunt Maria
hugging trees
HA! plot twist! 10/10 of these things are in my amangela au 'habits'. this is me inviting you to read it because i don't know how else to dfhdjkj
#this post started as me just listing the tropes that ive incorporated but there are WAY too many of them wow#i love rpf i would not make it as an author#like wdym i need character development?? one of them's hurt and one of them is comforting#thats the only way#anyway#q writes#habits#amangela#amangela fic#angela giarratana#amanda lehan canto#smosh rpf
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writing a fic abt rick having an ed bcs why would i recover when i can just project all my issues onto fictional old men in cartoons and pretend everythings better now ā¼ļø
tw eating disorder, minor self harm and vomit near the end
Morty stopped in the open doorway of the garage, watching Rick who was sat scribbling down some kind of invention idea, or equation, or whatever it was he did when Morty wasn't around, for all Morty knew he might well be writing fanfiction.
An involuntary smile pulled at his lips at the idea of his almost 70 year old genius grandfather spending his free time writing silly little stories at his work bench. What would he even write? Ball Fondlers fanfic? Maybe he wrote about his stoic bird friend, Rick had always been touchy with him and Rick wasn't touchy with anyone.
When Morty focused back on Rick he wasn't writing anymore, the slightly crumpled piece of paper shoved to the side as he fiddled with what looked like a small metal box with a bunch of brightly coloured wires poking out of the sides. A small spark shot out of one of the wires Rick was holding and he cursed loudly, shaking his hand.
"Fuck, Morty, are you just gonnaā gonna stand there, or are you gonna pass me the fucking, uhā the thing."
Rick waved his hand in the general direction of the shelf nearest to Morty, but there were so many assorted trinkets on the shelves, Morty had no idea if Rick wanted a wrench, or a hammer, or one of his laser guns, maybe the box was like a new battery for them?
"W-what thing, Rick?"
"The thing, Morty! The fuckingā the uh, destornillador."
"What? Rick, I don't know what that means. W-w-what is that?"
"Jeez, Morty, what are they teaching you at that crap school you love so much?" Rick scowled, tossing the box to the side and getting up to grab the screwdriver himself.
"I havent been to school in like a month, Rick!" Morty exclaimed. "And even then I only got to stay for like an hour before you were dragging me out again!"
"Whatever." Rick said with a burp, "School's dumb, Morty. I'll teach you Spanish myself. B-but, uh, not now."
He turned back to his box, done with the conversation, but Morty stayed hovering in the room, remembering what he had come for in the first place.
"Okay, um, w-w-well lunch is ready."
"I'm busy."
Morty sighed, having expected that answer already. "When's the last time you ate, Rick? Or slept? Or... showered?" Morty said, wrinkling his nose a little.
Rick ignored him, pulling at a blue wire.
"Rick!" Morty frowned.
"What, Morty? J-jesus christ, what the fuck do you want?"
"I want you to have lunch with the family."
"And I said no, so screw off."
"Rick, come on, it would make mom so happy."
Rick glared at him, not bothering with an answer.
"...Wouldn't y-you do it for your original Beth if you could?" Morty tried.
Rick slammed the box on the table, causing the thin metallic shell to crack, sparks flying from it, the sudden noise making Morty jump.
"The fuck did you just say?" Rick snarled.
"S-s-sorry!" Morty squeaked. "I didn't m-meanā mean it in a bad way!"
"Get the fuck out." Rick said icily, eyes blazing.
Morty stumbled out of the room, shutting the door behind him to the sound of something crashing. Probably Rick throwing the damaged box across the room.
Morty winced. In his defense he was worried about Rick, and sometimes, depending on his mood, something like that would've gotten Rick to cave, clearly he wasn't feeling so sentimental today, more annoyed and angry.
"What was that about?"
Morty startled a little and turned to see Summer looking at her phone behind him.
"Just, y'know, Rick being... Rick."
"Mhm, pro tip, don't bring up his dead daughter to try and blackmail him into something he hates." Summer drawled. "You can only do that if he's already half convinced, or if he's feeling especially depressed sometimes.
"Summer! That'sā that's messed up!"
She quirked an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah, so only you can manipulate grandpa Rick?" Summer scoffed. "God forbid women do anything." She said sarcastically and turned to walk away.
"Wait!" Morty fidgeted with his hands. "Can you... help me? To get him to have lunch w-with us? Please?"
"Yes, but not now. He's already upset so if we double down on trying to get him to eat he's only gonna clam up."
Morty nodded. "I know thatā but how do you? You don't spend as much time with Rick as I do."
"Because he's like mom. Who do you think got her to stop drinking before parent-teacher conferences at school?"
"Wow. That's pretty fucked up that you had to do that, though, y'know, Summer."
"Yeah, well, we're the Smiths, Morty. Is anyone in this house not disordered?"
Morty winced at the blunt statement, Rick really was rubbing off on her. But it was kind of true.
"Guess it runs in the family." He muttered
"Guess it does."
---
Morty hadn't been planning on seeing Rick again until the next day. He knew that when Rick got upset he needed his space. Morty didn't quite get it because when he was upset all he wanted was for someone to hug him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but Rick wasn't like him he supposed.
If he was being honest it made him nervous to leave Rick alone in those bad headspaces he got into. Rick was volatile and unpredictable and a borderline danger to himself and often others. He'd walked in on a couple... compromising situations where Rick had had to explain away why he was passed out in his chair or why there was blood on his hands and his lab coat despite being the only person in the room.
Morty pretended to believe him when he said he had been doing a messy dissection experiment or that "This isn't blood, this is Balorkian dust I mixed with red Squanchenite fluid from Planet Squanch, Morty." But truthfully those moments haunted him.
However, he didn't want to invade Rick's space, so he let him be and tried to eat and sleep until Rick emerged like nothing had happened, even though Morty knew what habits of his went on behind those closed doors.
Of course Morty's patience had it's limits, like when two hours after he had left Rick in the garage, angry, there was the sound of something smashing, closely followed by an unmistakable sound that Morty had grown too familiar with since Rick had moved in. The sound of a body thudding to the ground.
He was up from the sofa in a flash, at the garage door before Summer could even put down her phone, flinging it open.
He felt like he couldn't breathe, but the only sight that greeted him was a smashed bottle and rick lying on the floor next to it, not looking any more dead than usual, looking up at Morty blearily, cracking a smile.
"Oh, hi Morty. H-hey buddy." He slurred, clearly drunk out of his mind.
"Jesus fucking christ, Rick." Morty said weakly.
"What happened?" Summer breathed, now standing at his side.
"He's just drunk." Morty muttered, wrinkling his nose at the overpowering smell that he hadn't registered before between his state of panic and shallow breathing.
Summer ventured into the garage, picking up an empty bottle and sniffing it. "God, grandpa Rick, what the hell are you drinking in here, fucking rubbing alcohol?"
"Sum-Sum! 'M just having someā some fun drinks. Fun drinks just a lil' bit. Besides I only ever drank rub-rubbin' alcohol once, n' it wasā tasted like shit."
"What? I was being sarcastic, why would you drink that?"
"Because I was sad... was sad 'nd lonely after B-b-blood Ridge, couldn't find anythin' else. But 'm not s-sad now."
"What's Blood Ridge?" Summer frowned, "Actually it doesn't matter right now, you need to sober up."
"Get him some water," Morty interjected. "I'll clean up the glass. I also know where he keeps all his hangover serums and stuff, but he told me not to let you into any of his drug stashes."
"Fair enough." Summer shrugged, leaving to get Rick some much needed water.
While she was gone, Morty felt along the wall until he found the small hidden panel under Rick's desk. He fished out the light blue vial of fluid for hangovers, the red one he'd forced Rick to make that would sober him up and a green one that basically equivalated to getting your stomach pumped if you took it, just in case he'd taken more than just alcohol.
He shut the panel securely and placed the three coloured vials on Rick's work bench, grabbing a purple tube-like gadget from a shelf. He pressed a button on the back of it and typed in "Broken Glass" on a small hologram keyboard that emerged, then pressed that first button again. A blue ray shot out, scanning the garage, and the pieces of smashed bottle disappeared in a matter of seconds.
Morty looked over at Rick, who was still lying on the floor, but now he was tracing his fingers along a crack in the cold ground, his expression so solemn he almost looked sober.
"Rick?" Morty asked hesitantly.
"I miss her." He said flatly. "I miss her s-so much."
His words were still a little slurred but his tone had lost all the previous levity.
"I tried to save her, Morty, I t-t-tried, but I couldn't bring her back. And no one could ever replace her." A rough sob escaped his throat. Morty felt frozen. "I'm a crappy fuckin'ā piece of shit father but I didn't want to be. I was gonna fuckin' giveā give up everything for them, and I would've been happy. I would've been so happy as long as I had them, but he fuckin' took that from me! I nnever even got a chance."
Rick was crying, he was crying so hard that his tears stained the concrete dark grey and snot ran down his face sideways. He was shaking like a leaf and gasping for air.
Morty crouched down next to him, fists clenching and unclenching, unsure if he should hug Rick, or if that would make it worse. What else could he do?
"Ohā oh shit, Rick, Iā"
"My little girl, my baby." Rick continued between sobs. "She meant everything to me. S-so yeah, I would be better f-for her if I could, but she's gone. There's no point."
Rick's sudden fit of violent sobs was calming down, replaced by a look that Morty could only describe as pure hoplessness and defeat washing over his features.
"'S no point in anything."
Shit, this was bad. Rick didn't admit defeat, and he certainly didn't talk so openly about his feelings like this.
"Aw jeez, Rick, come on don'tā don'tā don't say that. we killed Rick Prime, remember?" Morty said, wringing his hands anxiously.
"Yeah, I remember." Rick said, tone now devoid of emotion. "I remember killin' him with my bare hands, watchin' the life drain out of his eyes as his blood dripped down my fists. And I remember nothing changing. W-w-what d'ya do when you achieve your life long goal and nothin's better? It didn't bring them back, it didn'tā didn't give me closure or give me a reason to live. I still can't sleep, petrified he's in the fucking house, comin' for my new family, that he'll kill all of you to teach me that t-that's what happens when I-I care about people."
Rick wiped his face with his lab coat sleeve, rubbing away the snot, drool and dried tears while Morty just kneeled next to him, frozen and unsure what to say.
"Rick..." he started but then Summer stepped through the doorway and Rick's demeanour instantly changed.
"Summerfest!" he called out and Morty watched, a little shocked, as Rick's whole face changed in the blink of an eye, going back to the cheerful, goofy expression he'd been wearing when he and Summer first came in. It didn't look artificial to Morty at all, even now that he knew it was. How could Rick just switch it on and off just like that?
"I brought water and coffee." Was all Summer said, placing two mugs on the workbench. "And a cereal bar."
The second statement sounded a little more unsure and Morty could've sworn he saw Rick's jaw clench for a second.
"Gimmie coffee." Rick said, making grabby hands, still lying on the floor.
"Water first." Summer replied, handing him the larger of the two mugs.
Rick pouted a little but as soon as the mug was in his hands he drank thirstily, finishing the whole thing in one go.
"You want more?" Summer asked, taking the mug, but he just shook his head quietly.
"Okay," Morty cleared his throat when his voice came out a little shaky. "drink this."
He handed Rick the red 'get sober' vial and Rick chugged it obediently, making a face. "Tastes likeā like shit." He offered.
While he seemed a little calmer after the water and serum, his eyes were still unfocused and his voice sounded thick, like his tongue didn't fit in his mouth properly, hints of his accent were slipping through too.
"Did you- are you on drugs r-right now?" Morty asked, reaching for the green vial of serum.
"Maybe." Rick mumbled. His eyelids were starting to droop a little and he curled up more comfortably on the floor.
"Hey, Rick, don't go to sleep okay? What did you take?" Summer asked, crouching down next to him, shaking him a little. He groaned. "Come on, we just have to make sure you're not overdosing and then you can sleep. Maybe not on the floor."
"'M not overdosing." Rick grumbled.
"What did you take?"
"I dunno. Just some random alien drugs I found i-in my pocket." He said dismissively with a burp. "Actually one of 'em was probably adderall. Look at me bein' all responsible an-and takin' my meds n' shit."
He of course immediately showed his 'responsibilty' by gagging and then throwing up on the floor.
Morty winced, reaching for the purple device again while Summer tried to coax him into drinking the green liquid, frowning deeply.
Finally Rick gave in, sipping from the small vial, and almost instantly his eyes began to clear up a little bit.
"Why'd I make these work so well?" He groaned. Then, "My head is killing me, I want coffee."
Summer passed him the second mug and he gestured toward the hangover serum, which Morty promptly passed to him and Rick poured it in his coffee.
He gulped down half the coffee and sighed, wiping his mouth with his already rather dirty sleeve. "Fuck, that's better."
He downed the rest of it and placed the mug on the ground, getting to his feet shakily. He swayed and nearly fell, leaning onto the wall to steady himself as the dizzy spell passed, and then stretched, his back cracking loudly.
He took a few wobbly steps towards the door but Summer blocked the way.
"Fuckā fuck off Summer I gottaā I'm gonna go take a nap."
"Could you maybe eat something first?" She asked firmly, holding up the cereal bar.
"No."
Rick tried to sidestep her but she blocked the way again.
"Summer, don't fucking piss me off right now, I'm serious."
She stood her ground. "Just eat the cereal bar, grandpa Rick. Please."
"Summer, for fuck's sake, I said no!"
"Grandpa," She sighed, the arm holding the bar dropping defeatedly back down to her side. "Do you have an eating disorder?"
The garage was deathly quiet for a second.
"Wha-What?! I'm not a teenage girl in a f-f-fā goddamn netflix drama, Summer." Rick snarled. "What the fuck kinda question is that?"
He gestured wildly, taking another step forwards, which quickly seemed to be the wrong option as a sudden wave of dizziness hit him hard, making him almost loose his balance. He blindly tried to grab onto the back of his chair somewhere behind him, but missed and fell on his ass.
"Rick!" Morty and Summer both rushed to his side, Morty's eyes beginning to well up a little from all the stress of the day.
"I'm fine, don'tā don't fucking touch me." He said, shaking Summer's hand off his shoulder, which caused another wave of nausea to hit.
"Please eat this." Summer said nervously, voice shaking as she pushed the cereal bar into his left hand, his right one gripping at his hair.
"Summer, I promise you if I eat that shit right now I'm gonna throw the fuck up."
"Please?" Morty pouted, eyes big and teary.
All it took was one look at him, and with only a brief moment of hesitation Rick snatched the cereal bar from Summer, muttering angrily under his breath.
Morty only caught "Me cago en la puta." and "Maldito cabrĆ³n." which he more or less understood, more familiar with swear words than any other words in the Spanish language.
Rick peeled away the wrapper slowly with unsteady hands and took a small bite.
Morty and Summer watched in silence, not wanting to discourage him by saying the wrong thingāwhich with Rick could be anythingāas Rick uncomfortably ate the cereal bar.
"There you fucking go." He said weakly, Throwing the now empty wrapper at Summer, but missing as it was too light to travel more than a couple centimetres, landing somewhere by his feet.
"Thank you." Summer almost whispered.
They sat in silence for a while, Morty sniffling and rubbing at his eyes and Summer shuffling a bit closer to him for both of their comfort.
Rick was sitting with his knees losely bent and his head braced in his hands, trying to overcome another hit of nausea.
He wouldn't exactly say he tried super hard to keep the cereal bar down, but it wasn't deliberate when he vomited it down the front of his shirt.
"Oh! Aw jeez..." Morty winced.
"I did warn you."
"In our defense, you had every reason to be lying to us."
"Fuck you, Summer." It sounded weak even to his own ears.
She sighed softly.
"Morty, get his shirt off. Do you have pijamas or do you sleep in jeans and a lab coat?"
"Jeans an-and a lab coat."
"...I was joking, but okay." Summer said, flipping the switch that opened Rick's garage closet and grabbing one of his sets of identical outfits.
Rick squirmed, making noises of complaint as Morty tried to take off his current shirt.
"Rickā stay still, you have vomit on your clothes."
"I'm not fucking two years old, Morty." He scowled. "I can change by myself."
Rick tried to sit up but wobbled and then slumped back against the wall, needing more time to recover. Morty reached for his shirt again and this time Rick let him pull it carefully up over his head without resisting. Morty took the new set of clothes from where Summer had left them on the floor next to him.
Summer wasn't looking but Morty still shielded Rick's body from sight with his own, pointedly not mentioning the raised scars and jagged, angry, red cuts littering his arms which he had already suspected would be there.
Rick shifted uncomfortably, seeming relieved when Morty didn't want to talk about it.
"Okay." Morty said, helping Rick pull on his clean lab coat too.
"I'm going to bed." Rick grumbled, not waiting for him to continue, just getting up slowly.
He felt weak and shaky and his brittle old bones weren't exactly helping out. Despite his thousands of cybernetic implants he was still human, much to his dismay, and he couldn't treat his body as badly as he did when he was 30. Not that that ever seemed to stop him, managing to still maintain the same shitty habits he'd had for years at the ripe age of 67.
He stumbled through the dining room, Morty and Summer trailing after him, not discouraged by the glare he sent their way.
As soon as he reached his room, he slumped onto his bed with a groan.
"R-rick?"
"Fuck off, Morty." He snapped into his pillow, a little muffled by it.
Morty hesitated, exchanging a glance with Summer, who shrugged.
"...Ookay, Rick. Uh, seeā see you at dinner, today? maybe?'
"Don't count on it."
Summer frowned, Starting to say something, but Rick interrupted, "I'm gonna apply my room's Lock Protocols in ten seconds, so i-if you're still in here, I'm not letting you out until I'm done sleeping. A-a-and if you're standing in the doorway, you're gonna get fucking squashed in the doors."
"Whatever, Rick, fuck you too." Summer huffed, pulling Morty out of the doorway with her.
"Room, activate Sensory Protocol 2. And t-tell Summer to go fuck herself."
"Sensory Protocol 2 activated." Came the mechanical voice and a heavy metal door snapped shut. "Go fuck yourself, Summer."
Summer scoffed. "Dick." Followed by a sigh. "What are we gonna do?"
"I-I don't know." Morty admitted. "There's not much we can do if Rick won't accept help. And he won't."
"So what? We just give up on him?" Summer asked accusingly, putting her hands on her hips.
"No, Summer, J-jeez. I justā We're gonna have to get creative."
"Fuck."
---
thats it thats the end i didnt know how tf to end this but my goal wasnt to rewrite like the bible idfk it was just to put rick through shit and put completely unfair expectations on summer and mortys shoulders so that they could ALL suffer in this fic !! :3 also this is so mf long i sincerely apologise if u read all that
#i feel like all the few rnm fics ive written are set in the garage im sorry š#thats where rick mostly is when hes not out in other dimensions tho ig#also even tho my fics r all rick centric i cant not have my boy morty in them#i just love him too much#also obligatory birdrick mention in the start bcs theyve been on my mind#also in regards to is anyone in this house not disordered let my drop my smith sanchez family disorder hcs >:)#okayyy#so starting off strong with beth: an alcoholic like her father probably anxiety stemming from her abandonment issues and possibly depressio#next up my boy morty: anxiety also and most likely ptsd from all the shit hes experienced ik a lot of ppl hc him as autistic but i dont#possibly adhd dyslexia or dyscalculia tho or all of the above idk#oookay next up jerry: i really spend incredibly little time thinking about jerry so idk im open to hearing hcs abt him tho#wait back to beth: maybe also ocd or smth like that#okay now summer: my girl has a lot of substance abuse issues as we see and fomo but idk if anything else maybe social anxiety or smth#aaand its rick time: alcohol and drug abuse definitely ptsd for sure depression and autism possibly adhd or bpd or both#in this fic he has an ed also so that#paranoia too#and thats it i think#also going back to the topic ofautism tho#i just cannot see it with morty at all like he shows no symptoms?? i dont see them at least idk i could be wrong#i honestly see it more with beth or summer maybe#but idk#also i almost never put the accents when i write in spanish lol but i did so#vey professional of me ik#gotta let rick say cabron properly#alex says shit#rick and morty#rick sanchez#morty smith#summer smith#rick and morty fanfiction
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to celebrate hitting 50k i'm sharing a snippet of the longfic i'm currently working on <3 (thank you v much to both @deepwithintheabyss and @paprikadotmp4 for the encouragement & brainstorming help <3)
still untitled (i've been calling it the "aob dubcon fic" lmao) but i have written a summary:
Jason tries to sell off his first heat to make ends meet for the upcoming winter. When heās taken by traffickers instead, heās sure thatās the end of himāuntil heās rescued by a mysterious alpha. That ārescueā comes with a price: Jasonās heat hits shortly after, andā¦ one thing leads to another, and now Jason and Tim are bound together by a fledgling mate bond. Itās not the first time Jasonās had to make the best of things, butā¦ he finds it a little bit easier this time, especially as he grows to genuinely like Tim.Ā Unfortunately, just as they're starting to settle into mated life, Timās ex-pack starts getting involved, and they donāt exactly approve of Timās choice in mateānever mind that it wasnāt really a choice at all.
cws/tags for this snippet: reverse robins, aob dynamics, underage jason (15), first aid, medical inaccuracies (probably; i'm not a doctor, so i'm warning to be safe), hurt/comfort, touch starvation, anxiety, allusions to captivity related ptsd, self-deprecation, brief memories of non-consensual touching
editing to add: this snippet takes place in the 2nd half of chapter 2 <3 (& was originally the second scene for the fic lol)
i have also previously shared a snippet of the scene after this, when jason's heat hits, here.
Tim parks outside of an old apartment building. The brick facade is worn, cracked and peeling in places. Most of the windows are intact at least, though; two of them have lights on, the rest dark.
Tim gets out first, already having rounded the car by the time Jason is swinging his legs out. His hand rests on the door, waiting patiently for Jason to join him on the sidewalk. Then he shuts it. One hand rests on Jasonās back again, a gentle guide inside.
Thereās a man at the desk near the front entrance, reading a newspaper. He spares them a brief, bored glance before going back to it.
Thereās an out of order sign on the elevator, so they have to take the stairs. Itās just two flights, but by the end, Jasonās slightly out of breath. Heād thought he was in pretty good shape, butā
He guesses spending nearly a week in a small, windowless room hasnāt done him any favors.
Tim stops at a door in the middle of the hall, unlocking it and letting Jason go in first. The main room is all one room; living room transitioning to kitchen, separated by an island counter. Tim guides Jason to the couch, directing him to sit while he gets the first aid kit.
The couch is worn but comfortable, cushions sinking under Jasonās weight, cradling him.
Tim disappears down the hall, and returns a few moments later holding the biggest first aid kit Jason has ever seen. Not that heās really an expert on the things, butā The one at his house was pretty small.
And mostly empty, honestly.
The coffee table looks comically small under it. It makes Jasonās belly flip with nerves, remembering the feeling of latex covered hands on his body, spreading him open.
He bites his lip.
Tim doesnāt open it, though; instead, he slips into the kitchen. He comes back a moment later, holding a bottle of purple Gatorade. Then, he kneels in front of Jason. Itāsāodd. Having an alpha kneel in front of him, voluntarily. Even though Jason knows he doesnāt exactly have any power here, the visual dissonance isā
Odd.
He offers up the bottle. It takes a moment for Jasonās hands to move, but he does take it. His fingers fumble with the cap; he flushed, embarrassed despite himself, but gets it open.
As soon as it touches his lips, his thirst hits him full force. He allows himself two large gulps to wet his throat, and then forces himself to slow down, sipping instead.
When he screws the cap back on, he finds Tim still there. Waiting. He twists his hands around the plastic nervously.
āAlright,ā Tim says gently. āOther than the bruise on your side, and the rope burnsā¦ are you injured?ā
Jason shakes his head, twisting the sleeves of the alphaās jacket. āNn-nn. Just some bruises,ā he says softly. He pauses. āAnd, um. I did hit my head once. It still hurts, butā Iām not, like, dizzy or nothinā.ā
Tim nods. āAlright,ā he says. āIād like to do a head injury evaluation anyway. Iāll just feel over your skull, and then use a penlight to evaluate your pupil dilation. Iāve got cream for the rope burns, and for the bruiseāā Tim hesitates a moment, then continues, āIāll need to check and make sure nothing is cracked, and thereās no internal bruising.ā He pauses again. āAs long as thereās nothing serious anywhere elseā¦ I have some painkillers you can take, when we eat.ā
Jason takes a moment to absorb all of that, and then nods, tipping his head forward obediently.
Thereās a part of him screaming at himself not to be so compliant. To kick and claw and scratch and bite and fight, the way he has been for the past week. But heāsā Heās so tired, and sore, andā
The alpha smells so good, andā The smiles he keeps giving Jason melt something inside of him. He wants to keep seeing them. Keep earning them.
Tomorrow that might scare him.
Tonightā
His eyes fall closed when Timās fingers slide into his curls. The touch is achingly gentle. It feelsā It feels good. Nice. Jason canāt help but lean into it. He thinks Timās hands linger a little longer than they need to, like heās indulging Jasonās obvious enjoyment of the touch.
He does pull away eventually. Jason bites back his whine, instead sitting back up against the cushions.
āNo bumps,ā Tim murmurs. He gets out the penlight next, and cups Jasonās face as he shines a light first in one eye, and then the other. Jason grimaces, hissing a little as he squints. The light aggravates his aching head. āPupil dilation is normal.ā He pockets the light, and strokes Jasonās cheek with his thumb before he pulls away. āNow, I need to check your bruises.ā
Jason bites his lip again. The constant worrying is starting to make the top layer of skin break and flake under his teeth. He averts his eyes, rolling the sleeves of the suit jacket up, exposing his hands. Then he pulls his shirt up, bunching it up just beneath his breasts.
His stomach jumps when Tim touches him. Tim pauses, hand hesitating, just barely touching Jasonās skin, and thenā He starts to rumble, low and deep.
Jason whines. He doesnāt mean toābut it bursts from him; he canāt stop it, canāt muffle it. Itās a soft, helpless little keen, and the alphaās rumble gets louder in response. He scoots closer, until heās between Jasonās knees. His hand settles onto Jasonās skin, curving around his side. His other hand comes to cup Jasonās shoulder, thumb rubbing gentle circles through his clothes.
āItās alright,ā he soothes, the rumble deepening his voice. The soundā
Jason has only vague memories of his father rumbling for him, from when he was much, much smaller. Before working as a henchman had stolen much of his fatherās good will. Other than that, Jason has only ever heard alphas rumble on TV. Itāsā
Itās a really nice sound.
Against his will, tears fill his eyes, and he raises his hand, pressing his palm over one, like he can force them back inside. Timās hand settles against his side, just underneath the bruising. āYouāre alright,ā the alpha murmurs. āItās okay to cry, pup.ā
Jason sniffs, loud in the quiet. āIāIāā
āShh, puppy.ā Timās hand doesnāt leave Jason as he rises, slipping onto the couch beside him. His other hand cups the back of Jasonās head, tugging him forwardāJasonās arms come up automatically, wrapping around Timās neck, his shirt falling back over his abdomen. The alphaās scent drips with comfort and the promise of protection and Jasonā
He feelsā¦ He feels warm, and safe, andā
A sob rattles through his chest. Tim holds him closer, tighter, his arm winding around Jasonās waist. He buries his nose in Jasonās curls, stroking his skin with his thumb as he rocks him, slowly.
Jasonās chest heaves. His whole body shakes with each sob, so much that Jason is worried heās going to shake himself apart. Timās steady hold feels like all thatās keeping him together.
Itās not just the last few days, itāsā Itās everything, since his Mom got sick and Dad turned to working as henchman and their lives justā¦ fell apart. Heāsā Jasonās been on his own for so long. Longer even than heās been on the streets. Every day has been a fight for survival and Jasonā
Honestly, he thought heād finally lost.
Tim murmurs in his ear. Jason canāt hear a word of what heās saying, but the tone is low and gentle, and Jason clings to it.
It takes a long time for Jasonās sobs to subside. Jasonā He doesnāt know how long exactly. But he does know that when heās done he feels exhausted. He slumps into Timās chest, tremors still running down his spine. His face is sticky. He definitely got snot all over Timās nice shirt, and thatā
Heās too tired to even worry about Timās reaction.
Fingers comb through his hair again, lightly scritching his scalp. He lets out a soft sigh, slumping even more against the alphaās chest.
Tim hums. He noses at Jasonās temple; a gentle nudge Jason grumbles at. āCāmon, pup,ā he murmurs. āI still need to look at your bruises.ā
Jason whinesāthe same plaintive little puppy whine he used to give his mom when he wasnāt ready to get up yet, for one reason or another. It makes Tim huff, amused; the humor reflected in his scent. Itās nice. Really nice.
He noses at Jasonās temple again. āPup.ā His voice is a little more stern. Itās not threatening, thoughādoesnāt even make Jasonās hackles raise. Tim is still rumbling. Close as they are, it feels like itās seeping into Jasonās bones. It lessens the ache in him. His skinā His skin has been itchy for years, but. The creepy crawling of it has subsided, for now at least.
Heās comfortable. Jason doesnāt want to move.
He does anyway, sitting back with a scowl on his face. It makes Tim smileāhis scowl deepens.
āIāll be quick,ā Tim promises.
Jason huffs a little. He leans back against the couch cushions. Timās hand is still under his shirt, sliding back over to the injured side as Jason lifts it. He feelsā He feels more settled now. Less nervous, though butterflies still flutter between his ribs.
Jason watched Timās fingers probe gently around the bruising. The purple has started to fade to a greenish hue, but it still hurts when he prods it. Jasonās quiet, pained noises are soothed with soft rumbles and fingers rubbing his shoulders.
When heās done, Timās hand lingers, laying casually on his waist. Jasonās skin would normally be prickling, butā
It isnāt.
It hasnāt this whole time, any time the alpha touched him.
āI donāt feel any cracks or breaks. Didā Were there any injuries to your back?ā Heās no longer rumbling.
Jason misses it already. Thereās a part of him that wants to snuggle up to him, see if he canāt coax that rumble back out.
He ignores it; instead shaking his head. āNo. Theyā The, um, the boss said they were supposed to keep me as uninjured as possible. Any punishment had to be careful not to leave a mark.ā
Tim hums. He strokes Jasonās skin with his thumb, and then slips his hand from Jasonās waist. Itā
Jason finds that he misses it.
Tim leans forward, finally opening the first aid kit. Itās stocked, full of things Jason has names for and things he doesnāt. Tim takes out two things: the first, a small jar, and the second, a bottle of puppyās Tylenol. Jasonāhe doesnāt like it, but he canāt really argue with it. Not at his size and weight and everything. Theyāre pills, at least, and chewable too,
Jason examines them carefully before he takes them, washing away the chalky flavor with the drink heād been given before.
Tim unscrews the lid of the jar. The cream inside smells herbal, though not unpleasantly so. Jason holds out his arm, relaxing into the couch as the alpha works the cream into his skin.
Itās easy to let his eyes fall half-lidded. Jason is warm and sleepy. The air is thick with protective alpha scent; it soothes his hind-brain, the part that is purely omega, purely pup and longing for the comfort and safety of pack.
A small voice in the back of his mind is screaming, telling him he needs to keep his guard up.
Itās easy to ignore like this. To focus on nothing but gentle hands on his skin and the ambient noise around him; the hum of electricity and the distant noise of outside traffic.
Jason drifts.
He barely registers when the alpha switches arms, coming back up only to croon confusedly when Tim stops touching him. He blinks up at him, and gets a kind smile in return.
āHush, pup,ā the alpha soothes. āIām going to get us something to eat.ā
Jason blinks slowly at him and hums in acknowledgment. Tim gets a blanket fromāsomewhere, and lays it over him. Itās soft. Jason likes it. He nuzzles into it, into more of the alphaās scent, and sighs.
He can hear Tim moving around in the kitchenāthe clatter of dishware and pans, the bubbling of boiling liquid, the sound of his soft footsteps. He can smell something savoryāchicken, he thinks, and garlic.
He drifts again, stirring only when Tim nudges him gently. A steaming bowl of soup is pressed into his hands.
āItās hot,ā Tim warns, a bit unnecessarily.
Jason still burns his tongue on the first mouthful. He doesnāt care. Having the food in front of him has made him realize how ravenous he is. His bowl is empty far too soon, though heās too stuffed to go back for seconds.
His empty bowl is taken from him, and then Tim returns again. āCāmon, pup,ā he murmurs. āIāve got a spare toothbrush you can use. A spare den, too. Iāll get you some nesting materials and pajamas while you brush your teeth.ā
Jason reluctantly leaves the couch and blanket behind, shuffling down the hall and into the bathroom. Tim procures a toothbrush for him, and then leaves.
Itās a relief to brush his teeth.
His captors had done it for him, so rough his gums had bled and ached. They still bleed under Jasonās gentle ministrations, but at least it doesnāt hurt. By the time heās rinsing his mouth, Tim has returned, a bundle in his arms. He offers it to Jason.
āClothes,ā he says, a little unnecessarily.
Jason takes them, and Tim leaves again, giving him privacy. Jason goes to shut the door and thenā
Hesitates.
He doesnāt want it open. Butā He doesnātā¦
What if he shuts it, and it wonāt open again?
Heās. Heās being silly.
Thereās no way this apartment has more than one bathroom. Trapping Jason inside here would be dumb, and he doesnāt think this alpha is dumb.
Jason takes a deep breath. He shuts the door.
Exceptā
He doesnāt. The latch hits the frame and Jason stops. His heart thunders in his ears. His breaths come sharper, quicker. He canāt. He canāt, he canāt, he canāt.
Tears burn in his eyes.
Itās not fair.
He rests his head against the frame; one hand cradling the bundle of clothes to his chest, the other gripping the doorknob.
God. Heās so fucking pathetic.
He shudders. Takes a deep breath. It shakes on his exhale, a tremor in his chest. Itās fine. He doesnāt have to shut it all the way. He can leave it like this, with the metal latch over the door frame, only the tiniest sliver of hallway visible.
Itās fine.
Heās fine.
Jason strips quickly, clothes falling into a puddle at his feet. He yanks on the pants the alpha provided. Theyāre a little short at the ankle, and he has to draw the drawstrings all the way out for them to stay up, but. They fit well enough.
The shirt, too, is a little big, hanging off slightly at one shoulder. It doesnāt show his breasts, and hangs down to his mid-thigh, so Jason doesnāt mind.. Both pants and tee are soft on his skin, not scratching like the other set did.
Thereās a hamper. Jason drops his old clothes in, though heād much rather see them in a dumpster somewhere. The jacketā
Jason hadnāt realized how much it had been comforting him until now. Without it, he feels almost naked. Exposed. He wants to put it back on again. He resists the urge, though. Instead, he straightens it as best he can, then folds it in half and lays it on top of the hamper before he exits the bathroom.
Tim isnāt in the living room any more, and Jason stands, nibbling on his lip. Maybe he should go for the doorā¦ but. He canāt bring himself to. Instead he stands there, uselessly, until he hears rustling further down the hall.
He approaches tentatively, and finds Tim in the den at the end of the hall.
Tim glances up when he hears Jason approach, and smiles a little. āI was just getting out some nesting materials,ā he says, gesturing.
In front of him is a cushioned nest base, held off the ground by a wooden frame. Piled on top of it isā
Jason had been expecting maybe a couple of blankets and some pillows, butā
The blankets are piled tall; the one on top Jason recognizes as the blanket heād been using on the couch. There are plenty of pillows, tooāand padding, for added layers, and cushions, and, itāsā¦ Itās a lot.
Jasonās throat feels a little tight. āThanks,ā he says, voice small.
āOf course, pup,ā Tim says gently. Heās pulled his scent in tight now, but when he draws nearer, Jason catches a whiff of safehere and everythingsokay drifting off of him. His hand moves slow enough it would be easy for Jason to avoid it, but. He stays still, letting the alpha brush his knuckles over his cheek.
āGoodnight, pup,ā he murmurs. āIf you need me, Iāll be just down the hall.ā
Jason nods. The alphaās hand drops, and then he leaves.
The rest of the denā¦ Itās not bare, but it lacks a personal touch. Thereās a chest of drawers in the corner closest to the closet; a nightstand by the nest; and curtains hanging over the window. He shuffles further in, leaving the door open behind him.
He leaves the nest alone for now. Insteadā
He goes for the closet first, opening the door. Itās bare inside, except for a thin layer of dust. Jason shuts it again. He opens the drawers, as quietly as he can. Empty as well. The den smellsā Not stale, itās definitely been used before, but. He catches the barest hints of alpha scent, and other than thatā¦ It just smells clean.
Jason rubs at his eyes.
No more putting it off.
As much as he doesnāt want toā¦ Jason doesnāt shut the door all the way. Instead, just like in the bathroom, he leaves it open the tiniest sliver. Anything more, and he wonāt be able to sleep. Anything lessā
Panic.
Even the thought makes his heart race.
Jason rubs his face. He hates this. He hates it so much. Fuck. Sometimes it feels like life is just out to get him. Likeāsomeone or something out there wants him to suffer.
Stop it. Plenty of people have it worse than you do, he scolds himself. Heās safe right now, orā He has the illusion of safety, at least. The alpha is being nice. Jason isā Heās not bound up. The door isnāt locked. There are no bars on the window. Tim treated his injuries. Held him when he cried. Gave him food and something to drink and soft clothes.
And heād given Jason plenty of material to make a nice, comfortable nest to den in. One that might finally satisfy the instincts that have been screaming at him.
Jason takes a breath, and pads over to the nest. The sheer amount of material before him is almost overwhelming, butā¦ He goes through it slowly. He starts with the padding, layering it into the nest base and using the cushions to help give it shape. He tests it as he goes, until he has something thatās plush, but not so much that it will engulf him. He works a nest cover over it. Itās a bit of a struggle to get it on, but Jason manages; only a little winded by the end. What padding and cushions he didnāt useā
He decides to put them in the closet, where theyāll be out of the way.
Blankets next.
Jason sorts through the pile slowly, rubbing each on his cheek. Scenting them. The one he used on the couch is the strongest scented; still thick with the contentment heād felt in the alphaās arms, and the protective, comforting scent Tim had drenched the air with.
He ends up using a little over half of the blankets Tim provided. The rest he puts in the closet.
Pillowsā
Jason doesnāt use as many of them. He ends up putting most of them in the closet. And then, finallyā
His nest is done.
He stands back, surveying his handiwork. He trills with pride, running his hand over the edge. His nest is soft. Cozy. It needsā It needs books. Andā His fox. He misses his fox, the one his mom gave him. He kept itā He managed to keep it safe, all this time.
Itās probably gone now. Or ruined.
His eyes sting, and he swipes at them roughly.
Jason is so tired of crying.
He climbs into bed, pulling the blankets over and around him, snuggling down into the pillows. It feelsā
Safe.
Thereās something missing, though. Jasonā Heās not sure what it is, butā
Heāll worry about it in the morning.
#jaytim#timjay#tauriawritesfanfic#aob dubcon fic#i'm so tempted to start posting even tho i usually prefer to wait till its done#ive broken everything into chapters; have a list of tags; wrote a summary...#i do not. have a fucking title tho#most of my titles were brainstormed for the 15k version!! which. hm. i *could* post that separately maybe...?#smth to think about#a n y w a y#hope u enjoy <333#as soon as this fic lets go of the chokehold it has on me i'll get back to like#prompts & the other wips languishing in my docs#(and when i say chokehold i mean i started writing this around like... december 20th?)#(and you can thank abyss for THAT too bc this all spiraled from 8k of a genfic i showed them <3)
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almost january which means it's almost st sebastian's feast day which means it's almost light yagami's death day which means it's almost february which means it's almost valentine's day which means im six months behind on all of my projects
#ough i have so much to do and then also real life stuff that makes me want to curl up and die but i really gotta get my applications sent#out n stuff so i know what the fuck im going to be doing with my life before the not knowing kills me#but anyway i have a few things planned that i'd like to get done soon but the biggest one is prolly gonna be valentines day bc like#the cards i did last year took me TEN MILLION YEARS to do and i'd like to make them nicer this year and also i have more mutuals#but i think it'll be fun i think i;ll just have to start much much earlier this time around tho#ive found ive become rlly taken w valentines day since getting on tumblr i like doing valentines things i mean i used to do those irl too#but i like drawing themed cards 4 ppl on here and then getting to send them all it's fun#and i have other projects n i wanna participate in some events (much less than last year tho im thinking One piece per event so i dont#fuck myself over again) and i should rlly get started on kinktober things. might seem early but writing takes me foreverrrrr#and i'd like to have at least one fic done for it that i feel completely happy with#whatever i just have much to do fandom-wise. and also much to do not fandom wise but if i think about it i'll start crying so im thinking#about fandom things#also btw if anyone knows of any new dn events being set up lmk so i can add them to my calendar i think i have all the big ones and their#potential/planned dates set up but i like to know everything forever
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