#ive got too many things i can't use up
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darcyfirth · 2 years ago
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idk if i have updated you guys on this yet but i bought a pc!
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ambivartence · 2 years ago
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My top songs (of the first half) of 2023 ✦ Boys Planet edition ✦
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tagged by @lunetual @jikyu @leewonseo @lee-minhoe ty 💕
I've listened to over 300 new releases from over 100 different kpop artists this year so picking my top songs felt like an mnet-level survival show 😭 the irony that i never watched Boys Planet AND one of the songs is literally a Peak Time song is not lost on me ! 🙃 but i wanted to pick a trendy format so here we are 😈 anyways i included albums instead of songs that didn't make the cut since there's too many honorable mention songs that i have had on repeat this year 😭 but most of them are in these 22 albums (oo-li is on here twice and istj isn't out yet !)
if u like my gif template, here's the link ! pls credit me ty <3
tagging (no obligation ofc and if you've already posted will u tag/send me so i can see 🥺): @bahngentertainment @chrisbangs @coupsnim @dakbees @dive-in-the-blue @hannahbahng @hyunfelix @ingblr-s @jinniebit @kyubins @losergirlz @quokki @shorelinnes @starcatching @userjiung @userwoodz @wabisaba @woodziecup @yohanblr + anyone else who wants to share just say that i tagged u <3
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autumnalhalcyon · 4 months ago
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#i am at my fucking limit lol#i need to leave this fucking town and this fucking state the very second i can nail down both a car and a remote job#the fucking ''''affordable'''' housing company i rent from has once again opted to start harassing us#and we're once again gonna have to be in a fucking fight with landlords who think that we're making too much money to live in a $1200 apt#and want us to pay $2000 a month for this rathole we live in despite taxes and deductions literally absorbing a quarter of our earnings#so they want to absorb half of what we have left when ive yet to be able to even afford a car that isn't a fucking beater destined for scrap#at least not without using p much all of my current life savings in the process#so we have to instead get around by buses that refuse to actually show up take us on huge detours for no reason have lead feet that-#-exacerbate my chronic pain and - oh! how could i forget? is also horrifically mismanaged to the point where they're now canceling entire-#-bus routes including the one i take to work and ALSO GOES TO THE AIRPORT lol#and nothing will fucking change about the highway robbery rent hikes bc the entire state legislature is filled with and bought by-#-landlords NIMBYs and property management firms.#that's not even getting into the fact that ive got too many traumatic memories too many enemies and not enough good things to show for it#the only thing I've got in this fucking town is my partner bc not even our home can be considered safe anymore.#i want to take them and the home we dream of and get the fuck out bc i can't keep doing this shit#and i can't even fucking talk to them about this bc they need me to be the strong one for once#im so tired. i feel like im in danger even though i know we'd be able to tank the hit to our finances. but i would like to escape.#i know of a city in ny where our $1200 rent is considered the norm. there's also so much more to do within reach that isn't just. drinking.#i wanna go there. i may have had a desire to live there since our vacation there this past March.#but for now im stuck here dreaming of the future and fighting off desperation and despair in the present#this breakdown brought to you by: the bus purposely avoiding my stop this morning after learning my landlord wants to ruin us again#vent
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lith-myathar · 1 month ago
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disordered eating talk in the tags
#disordered eating cw#so like i did a stupid and took my meds this morning without eating breakfast and about mid morning#i had too much water and got super nauseous and had to throw up#and i realized that i still have a weird THING around purging#i don't feel like throwing up is an experience that should engender a sense of comfort in a person but it does in me#like i didn't even have anything in my stomach it's not like i had binged or whatever#but just the purgative act in itself feels GOOD to me#like a relief#kind of brings to mind how in my most stressful/mental breakdown-y times or during panic attacks all that's ever clear in my mind#is a desire to throw up. to just get this horrible feeling i can't process out of me#and i think it kinda speaks to how much food and eating or not eating or *purging* was how i found control and a sense of stability#having ednos is irritating bc it basically means you did a little of everything and none of those individual things ever got really dramatic#so it wasn't exactly noticeable but it all adds up into a pattern of behavior around food that's just deeply dysfunctional#and getting people to take it seriously is really difficult bc so many of those behaviors are normalized#but all those little behaviors were how i took back control. i would spite the people around me who policed my body by binging#i would try to control how i felt about myself (and how other people saw me and treated me) by restricting#and when i felt out of control i would take it back and reground by purging#so even now if im stressed out (which i am lately) it feels comforting and grounding to purge#even if im not doing it on purpose#which is....fucked tbh. i guess on just a primal level it makes some sense bc that's how our bodies protect us from things we've ingested#that could potentially harm us. so of course there's some relief around it. but im not eating anything that will hurt me#it's all just shame and terror and feelings i can't express and wanting them OUT#thankfully it's not something ive ever done chronically bc the stigma against EDs in my house growing up was also high#and if i didn't throw up or totally starve myself it was just dieting right? i would only half starve myself#and i would only throw up here and there. as a treat. once or twice isn't an eting disorder surely?#i just really regret how much ''bad'' food i just ate and i want a do over. it's not disordered if it's just this one time#this is a special circumstance and I'm Different#goddddddddddddddd#what's wild too is i can look back on this stuff now and see it for what it was but to most people none of that behavior#would ping as a Real Disorder
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itsalwaysdark · 4 months ago
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and also it doesnt even matter if i miraculously get a job tmrw bc we don't have a car . and im too out of shape to walk anywhere bc everything is far away . so i genuinely dont jnow what to do
#im not smart or talented or hot enough to have a source of income working from home.#i dont have a ged or a kicense or a way to get to work or much experience + ive got a steadily fucking growing gap in my employment history.#And i have essentially 0 social skills i barely Function half the time im dissociated or just crying. im weak and out of shape and#not pretty im like. unhireable i think . and again even if a place did hire me I dont have a way to fucking get 2 work#i might be able to walk 2 a place if i had been at work for a while bc if be more used to being on my feet and active again. its take a#while and id be in a Lot of pain but like. itd be doable. and once i worked for s bit i could get lyfts even tho Expensive also idk that#there as many drivers here. and wtvr. but if i did that itd be Less money to help my family and less money to save up toget my own place and#atp maybe its selfish of me to want my own place and i need to judt be more grateful im allowed 2 stay here . yk#idk. im so tired i just need like. idk. ik the only way is to just get through it and get a job and make it work but it feels so pointless#everything always does. i cant keep getting over hurdles man im so fucking tired of getting through hurdles#every single day is Difficult and every single day is the Same and any time j manage to have a good day ill just go right back to feeling#exactly the same. and even if it looks like everythings better for a bit it all goes back down eventually and ik im supposed to be like But#itll get better again after that <3 ups and downs are a part of life <3 we have to have the bad to appreciate the good <3 im just fucking#sick of the goddamn bad im fucking sick of it ive had enough bad i want good. ik other ppl deserve it more i want everybody to have good#days and be safe and happy i don't want things to keep getting worse but everything just gets worse and all the good parts r tempirary and#im so tired. I am not your strongest soldier bro !!!#idk. i just want to be atable i dont need anything crazy i just want my family to live comfortably and to have enough money that i can#donate i rly donot need much i dont need that much food 2 survive i dont need a ton of space i dont need a nide house i like. i just want to#be Stable and know that everything will be ok. yk. at least 4 my family i want them all to be able to eat and the bills 2 be paid and#hopefully for lamp and the kids 2 go to college. bc lamp and tag both want to go to college and itsy is 6 so he soesnt care#but i want them to be able to so bad bc i can't and i ws never gonna be able to and i dont get to be whiny abt that but like. they want to#and theyre smart and passionate and like. i want them to be able to achieve their dreams and get to have normal lives and be fulfilled and#happy. yk. idk. annie showed me her schoolwork the other day and since it wa first week at like. an alt school it ws a lot of personality#type stuff and mental health stuff and im not gonna get into it bc its not mine to tell but. their answers for one of the things made me so#upset bc it sounded so much like me when i was their age and even now and it makes me feel so guilty that like. i didnt make it better for#them. im the one whos supposed to endure it and then theyre supposed to get to be happy but im too fuckinf weak nowadays and i can't keep#any of them safe or happy and i feel so insanely useless. i hate it i just want to be useful idc anymore like. i want to be good i want to#be helpful i want to be cared abt and its so selfish bc a part of me is like. Ohh wahhh we shouldnr have to do all that to be cared abt wahh#and its dumb bc Yes i do its my job. it just fucking sucks rn bc like i have all the like. sorrow over this being what i have to do and this#is my lot in life but i also have all the guilt over how im not doing it bc km lazy and selfish and i cant just work bc im . Ugh
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etls · 1 year ago
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so fucking angry. why. why did my mum KNOWINGLY treat me worse because she knew some of what I had been through and knew she couldn't fix it. so she minimised everything I felt. ridiculed me for showing any emotion. still does so to this day. but she ADMITTED. that she fucking abused me my entire LIFE, because I was going through so much that my mental health wasn't fixable by her. so she chose to add to my issues? and now she gets fucking upset when I tell her I will never be her fucking friend? that we will never get along? you fucking CAUSED this jo-anne you did this to your fucking SELF.
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tellafairy · 4 months ago
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thoughts on shifting + manifesting with ease. (as someone who's shifted many times, alongside manifesting)
coming back to this side of tumblr after spending years away from it has made me realized how many of you are truly the problem, it might sound kinda harsh but really. so many of you ask the same questions over and over again.. "but HOW do i do it?" "how do i shift" "how do i manifest" JUST DO IT. stop looking for signs, stop looking for methods or "cheat codes". just do it man.
your mind is so powerful and it actually kinda irritates me how many of you doubt it, just because it "seems to easy". you don't understand how you've been manipulated by society to not see your power. how have you been on loa social media, shifting social media, for soooo long — yet still don't see it?? let me tell you..
the moment i got off social media, the moment i took time to erase everything in my head and stop overthinking everything, was the moment everything came to me. i already had it, i just needed to stop telling myself i didn't.
it took me barely any time to get used to convincing myself i had everything i wanted, i shifted to my desired realities, and everything worked out in my favour. AFFIRMING IS ALL YOU NEED. I AM YELLING AT YOU. JUST AFFIRM.
really, please, affirm. the routine is so simple.
1. any bad thought is instantly turned positive.
ex: "i really want her waist"
to
"am i stupid ... i have her waist.. tbh mine even looks a little better.. am i crazy?? like actually? this must be a glitch or something cause my waist is practically identical to hers.. i literally love my waist"
exaggerate, say what you need to say to erase the negativity.
2. it's yours, so act like it..
ex: talk about ur DR normally. it's your reality, not a fantasy land you made up in a dream. ITS REAL. it's a reality. for example, i'd watch videos of my s/o in this reality, and speak about our lives in my dr. "i can't wait to see __ tonight... god i love __, it's so nice hanging out with them everyday.. wow they look so pretty in this video — i'm so lucky their mine". it's natural, they're yours aren't they? exactly, so act like it.. this is used the exact same way when manifesting..
you see someone with something you want? thinking of something you wanna do? something you wanna be? ... it's urs... so can you act like it?? like whyre u feeling sad someone else got a job promotion 😹😹 you literally got a better one ...
3. that's literally it
you don't need a fancy method (although it can give u some peace of mind.. let's be real, a lot of methods set y'all back and make you overwhelmed, blocking ur beliefs and making everything seem harder). you literally just need to live. tell yourself it's done, over and over again. nothing matters. it's done, it's yours, you have it, you're happy and fulfilled. other peoples sucess should really mean nothing to you negatively. it shouldn't make you stressed, shouldn't make you feel behind.. why would it when you have everything, you can do everything, go anywhere, and you can be anything.
it'll seem like manifesting blogs and shifting blogs just repeat the same things.. which is true, they do, because i'm telling you there's nothing more to it than what you've already read. it is that easy. all it takes is your mind. decide, and tell yourself.
as i said before, it took me barely anytime to switch my mindset once i actually started focusing on myself, my journey and not every body else's results. repeating stuff to yourself WORKS. repeating is literally ALL i did. choose what i want, told myself it's mine in any way i could describe it. and there, it's mine. ive shifted to many different realities, along side gaining a better life in this one after years of convincing myself there was nothing for me. if i can break out of the cycle, trust me you can too. i cannot describe how desperate i was at the beginning, how long i took in false info and wasted time on methods all while doubting every single thing.
so why don't you believe it? you'll sit there and tell yourself over and over again that you're ugly, or broke, or friendless... but you won't tell urself that you've shifted? that you have your dream body...? girl okay i guess....
once you realize nothing besides your mind truly matters, is when you'll be free with yourself. circumstances don't matter, past feelings don't matter, doubts don't matter, your mind is all you need.
yes this is just loa explained longer, that's the point of the post because some of u still can't get it in ur heads
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lxnarphase · 1 month ago
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━ dear sukuna...♡
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✷ synopsis .ᐟsome of my personal headcanons for heian era!sukuna ♡
✷ content .ᐟ heian era!sukuna x fem!reader, oc mention [nonromantic], fluff, teasing, name for sukuna's stomach mouth, sad childhood (poor kuna :<)
✷ lunar's note .ᐟ these are just a few headcanons ive wanted to share about heian sukuna but i have so many more that i will 100% make another one of these for this sukuna AND different sukuna's, like fratboy!kuna, modern!sukuna, jujutsu high teacher!kuna, etc. whatever other aus i think of !! i hope u guys like my silly lil thoughts :33
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sukuna was abandoned by his mother and father at a young age as his more monstrous features began to develop. the village he was born into grew to despite him as a young boy, blaming any misfortune on his existence. it got to a point that they figured the only way to get rid of the bad luck in the village was to kill him. before this, a sorcerer woman named chiyo, quickly got him to safety and cared for him as he grew older.
during his childhood, sukuna nearly burned down an entire forest trying to learn how to use divine flame. he hasn't told anyone beause he still gets overly embarrassed when he thinks about how badly he fucked up.
during his time with chiyo, sukuna met uraume. he practically dragged uraume home and simply said "this one can cook. they are staying" and chiyo just sighed and accepted it. he always seemed to have a thing for strays.
when chiyo became older, she became extremely sick and ended up passing. because of the bond he formed with her, sukuna couldn't accept her death and ended up transforming her into a curse. instead of being monstrous, however, chiyo is relatively human looking...but now just an old lady who huffs playfully at sukuna for not letting her sleep.
while he does have concubines, sukuna wants a wife who can keep up with him. yes, being gifted the finest women is a pleasure and fuels his ego, but he wants to ensure the person he marries checks all the boxes. no one knows him best except himself, after all
if any concubine or servant is caught speaking ill of his wife, uraume, or chiyo, sukuna will not hesitate to kill them. after all, he selected them to be the closest people in his life. if someone questions his decisions, they have no worth to him.
sukuna gets extremely grumpy whenever you get sick because he just. cannot figure out how to take care of you without being too overbearing or accidentally calling you weak. yes, he's one of the most powerful sorcerers to walk the earth, but seeing you sweat from a fever makes him feel weak and he projects a little bit.
sukuna's stomach mouth was playfully named 'mokuna', or 'moku for short, by chiyo as a combination of mouth and sukuna. he swears up and down he hates the name, but the mouth on his abdomen can't help but grin and grumble happily when it's referred to by a name.
he will never admit it, but sukuna has a massive sweet tooth. yes, he will steal candy from a baby, he does not care. if it smells sweet and makes his mouth water, he wants it.
sometimes, when sukuna is sleeping, moku will still be 'awake' and will try to communicate with you. it can't speak verbal words very well, but it's so expressive that you find it relatively easy to figure out what it's trying to say.
sukuna is a shitty liar when moku is visible because if he tries to act grumpy and upset at the sweet cooing and petting your giving him, mokuna is practically purring, giving you a little lick on whatever part of you it can reach. it's so fucking cute too when he tries to hide the pink tinge on his ears
sukuna LOVES water, he loves soaking in the onsen for hours, loves swimming in large ponds and lakes. he turns into a little kid when he seems a big lake with crystalline water and will not hesitate to stop everything he's doing to drag you into the water with him
when he sleeps, sukuna will purr a little if he's having a good dream...if you get lucky, you might catch mokuna awake, trying not to laugh at it's host acting like a kitten in his sleep.
sukuna very rarely has nightmares, but occasionally will have short but vivid dreams about his childhood. he will never admit they bother him, but you know something is up when you feel him playing with your hair in the middle of the night. you let him have his moment, pretending to be asleep against his chest as he busies himself with your hair to distract his mind.
uraume and chiyo are the biggest gossips when put together, and while sukuna does his best to act as thought he thinks gossip is pointless, he's always listening attentively when they get to talking. "the new servant was caught sleeping with the local seamstress' husband? how whorish of him...was he the top or bottom?"
sukuna really, really, really likes seeing you in gold. if he could, he'd stare at you all day, in nothing but gold and jewels on the bed, looking like his little gold hoard as if he's some kind of dragon. if he wasn't so jealous, he'd have you like this publicly so everyone would know what a goddess would look like. but, he knows he'd violently maul anyone who sees you naked...that's for him and him only.
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all rights reserved © lxnarphase | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work
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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year ago
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A media literacy handbook for Israel-Gaza
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Next Tuesday (Oct 31) at 10hPT, the Internet Archive is livestreaming my presentation on my recent book, The Internet Con.
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Media explainers are a cheap way to become an instant expert on everything from billionaire submarine excursions to hellaciously complex geopolitical conflicts, but On The Media's "Breaking News Consumers' Handbooks" are explainers that help you understand other explainers:
https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/segments/breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-and-gaza-edition-on-the-media
The latest handbook is an Israel-Gaza edition. It doesn't aim to parse fine distinctions over the definition of "occupation" or identify the source of shell fragments. Rather, it offers seven bullet points' worth of advice on weighing all the other news you hear about the war:
https://media.wnyc.org/media/resources/2023/Oct/27/BNCH_ISRAEL_GAZA_EDITION_1.pdf
I. "Headlines are obscured by the fog of war"
Headline writers have a hard job under the best of circumstances – trying to snag your interest in a few words. Headlines can't encompass all the nuance of a story, and they are often written by editors, not the writers who produced the story. Between the imperatives for speed and brevity and the broken telephone between editors and writers, it's easy for headlines to go wrong, even when no one is attempting to mislead you. Even reliable outlets will screw up headlines sometimes – and that likelihood goes way up in times like these. You gotta read the story, not just the headline.
II. Know red flags for bullshit
The factually untrue information that spreads furthest tends to originate with a handful of superspreader accounts. Whether these people are Just Wrong or malicious disinfo peddlers, they share a few characteristics that should trip your BS meter and prompt extra scrutiny:
High-frequency posting
Emotionally charged framing
Posts that purport to be summaries or excerpts from news outlets, but do not include links to the original
The phrase "breaking news" (no one has that many scoops)
III. Don't trust screenshots
Screenshots of news stories, tweets, and other social media should come with links to the original. It's just too damned easy to fake a screenshot.
IV. "Know your platform"
It used to be that Twitter got a lot of first-person accounts from people in the thick of crises, while Facebook and Reddit contained commentary and reposts. Today, Twitter is just another aggregator. This time around, there's lots of first-person, real-time reporting coming off Telegram (it runs well on old phones and doesn't chew up batteries). Instagram is widely used in both Israel and the West Bank.
V. "Crisis actors" aren't a thing
People who attribute war images to "crisis actors" are either deluded or lying. There's plenty of ways to distort war news, but paying people to pretend to be grieving family members is essentially unheard of. Any explanation that involves crisis actors is a solid reason to permanently block that source.
VI. There's plenty of ways to verify stuff that smells fishy
TinEye, Yandex and Google Image Search are all good tools for checking "breaking" images and seeing if they're old copypasta ganked from earlier conflicts (or, you know, video-games). The fact that an image doesn't show up in one of these searches doesn't guarantee its authenticity, of course.
VII. Think before you post
Israel-Gaza is the most polluted media pool yet. Don't make it worse.
There's plenty more detail on this (especially on the use of verification tools) in Brooke Gladstone's radio segment:
https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/episodes/on-the-media-breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-gaza-edition
The media environment sucks, and warrants skepticism and caution. But we also need to be skeptical of skepticism itself! As danah boyd started saying all the way back in 2018, weaponized media literacy leads to conspiratorialism:
https://www.zephoria.org/thoughts/archives/2018/03/09/you-think-you-want-media-literacy-do-you.html
Remember, the biggest peddlers of "fake news" are also the most prolific users of the term. For a lot of these information warriors, the point isn't to get you to believe them – they'll settle for you believing nothing. "Flood the zone with bullshit" is Steve Bannon's go-to tactic, and it's one that his acolytes have picked up and multiplied.
It's important to be a critical thinker, but there's plenty of people who've figured out how to weaponize a critical viewpoint and turn it into nihilism. Remember, the guy who wrote How To Lie With Statistics was a tobacco industry shill who made his living obfuscating the link between smoking and cancer. It's absolutely possible to lie with statistics, but it's also possible to use statistics to know the truth, as Tim Harford explains in his 2021 must-read book The Data Detective:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/01/04/how-to-truth/#harford
There's a world of difference between being misled and being brainwashed. A lot of today's worry about "disinformation" and "misinformation" has the whiff of a moral panic:
https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2023/10/are-we-having-a-moral-panic-over-misinformation.html
It's possible to have a nuanced view of this subject – to take steps to enure you're not being tricked without equating crude tricks like sticking a fake BBC chyron on a 10-year-old image with unstoppable mind-control:
https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/28/fog-o-war/#breaking-news
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ashwhowrites · 8 months ago
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AHHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOUR REQUESTS TO OPEN UP!!!!! I’m obsessed with your writing 😩 (I apologize in advanced for my gibberish below for I am VERY high 😂)
Anywho (and you can totally ignore this if it’s not your cup of tea):
Would you possibly do an angst to fluff Eddie x reader fic where maybe instead of reader being the popular one, it was Eddie instead? Like instead of everyone hating on hellfire, they think it’s super cool and so Eddie is super popular and reader is like a quiet nerd. And like reader has a big crush on Eddie and Eddie knows but always makes fun of her for it because of his reputation but he secretly likes her too and then the events of the upside down happen? Like maybe it’s reader who lures the bats away instead of Eddie but Eddie saves the reader before she dies from the bats and he admits that he likes her back and they start dating?
Again, if it’s not your cup of tea you can totally ignore it but you’re the only person I feel like would do something magical with this.
I'm honored you believe I can do something magical with this. I hope I won you over.
I think this might be my favorite Eddie fic to date. I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I do! Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
⚠️it ends happy and I like the ending. So don't complain in the comments about "she shouldn't have taken him back" it's fiction and sometimes we just want things to work out so for this fic, leave that opinion to yourself. Saying that in the kindest way I can❤️
To die for
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Y/N wasn't the type to hang out with the popular crowd. She kept her distance and didn't interact with anyone. She focused on her studies and getting into the best school offered. No one wanted to stay in Hawkins, and she worked to get her ticket out.
Then she got a little distracted, and she hated to admit it.
Eddie Munson, the leader of hellfire. He was a punk, loved music, and caught the eyes of every girl. Y/N didn't see the attraction until they got paired to do an assignment in music class.
She twiddled her thumbs nervously when he walked over. She inhaled his cologne as he pulled out the chair next to her, his bright smile flashed her way as his cheeks scrunched. He was the only popular kid in music, and she was terrified to be paired with him.
But as they worked together, they talked about themselves. It turned out they had a lot in common. While the assignment was boring research, she couldn't help but be excited to go to music every day. The assignment was a huge part of their grade so the teacher gave them a month's worth of class to work on it. It didn't take more than one class for Y/N to be just as smitten with Eddie.
~~~
"I hate that we couldn't pick which musician to research. Like why can't we do Dio?" Y/N mumbled as she began to write down notes.
Eddie never lifted his head so fast, he looked away from the computer towards Y/N. Her eyes were on her paper.
"You listen to Dio?" Eddie let out a breathy laugh. He was shocked, to say the least. He never thought the cute nerd would listen to a band like that.
"Who doesn't," Y/N laughed, she finished writing the sentence and looked up. She gulped when she noticed Eddie's warm eyes staring at her. A smile of adoration on his face, it made her stomach flip.
"Damn, there's more than just brains and beauty to you, huh?" Eddie joked as he went back to the computer. His words repeated in Y/N's head as she sat stunned. Did he just admit she was pretty?
~~~
Y/N cleaned her room at a rapid pace. Eddie was going to be over any minute and she was terrified. She was positive Eddie had seen the inside of many girl's bedrooms and she did not want to leave a bad impression compared to the rest.
~
"Can we take a break? My eyes hurt." Eddie groaned as he fell back against her soft bed.
"Sure, I'll grab us some water." Y/N offered, as she went out of the room. Eddie stood up, and his socks landed on the soft carpet. He walked around her room. He took in her huge collection of books, many he never heard of before. He looked at her wall of music. Band posters were on the walls and cassettes were neatly placed on a shelf. He had to admit, she had great music taste.
Her closet was cracked open, and Eddie couldn't fight the urge. He cringed as the door creaked as he opened it.
"Pretty girl," Eddie smiled as he grabbed the acoustic guitar that leaned against the wall.
"What are you doing?"
Eddie jumped but kept a tight grip on the neck of the guitar.
"Uh, sorry. I was snooping." Eddie confessed, "You play?"
Y/N blushed at the thought of him snooping, embarrassed of what he found and thought.
"I've always wanted to, but I'm not very good. One of the things I couldn't teach myself." Y/N laughed sadly.
"Sit, I'll teach you," Eddie said, he sat on her bed
"Um, are you sure?"
"Pretty girl in my lap as I teach her the thing I love? Yeah, I'm sure." He smirked as she slowly walked over. She sat the water down on her side table.
She coughed as she sat on the bed, next to him.
"Can't teach you all the way over there," he teased, she swallowed her nerves when he moved behind her. He placed the guitar in her lap and wrapped his arms around her.
"You smell nice," Eddie said against her ear. Y/N felt her tongue go numb, too nervous to respond.
She placed her fingers on the guitar and Eddie's ghosted over hers. She tried to focus on his directions and movements, but his breath hitting her neck sent her somewhere down south.
After an hour, she successfully could play a few chords.
"That a girl," Eddie praised as he placed the guitar to the side. "Unfortunately, I have to go home."
"Oh um yeah, thanks for teaching me," Y/N said shyly as Eddie put on his jacket.
"Pleasure is all mine," Eddie winked.
Y/N stared at the spot where he once stood for what felt like hours.
~~~
After spending a full month together, Y/N didn't want it to end. Their assignment was turned in, and now they didn't have a reason to see each other.
Y/N found a way. She sat on the phone all night trying to win tickets to the Dio concert, on Friday night. She scored the tickets and couldn't wait to tell Eddie the exciting news. She raced through the halls spotted his curly hair and headed his way.
"Eddie!" She said excitedly as she bounced on her feet. She ignored all the friends surrounding him. Her eyes were on his. She felt her excitement dissolve when Eddie's eyes looked panicked. He looked at her and his friends, she swore he looked like he was going to throw up.
"Yo dude, who's this?" one of his friends said as the group laughed and nudged Eddie's arm.
"Some type of little girlfriend?" Another one was added on
Y/N blushed at the thought of being Eddie's girlfriend. It wasn't like she didn't think about it with all the flirting and soft touches.
But Y/N ignored in and continued.
"I scored tickets to Dio! This Friday night, you and me?" She was proud of herself for making it through the sentence without shaking.
Eddie's friends laughed....loud
Their screeches could be heard blocks down from the school. But she kept her focus on Eddie. He stood frozen. He didn't say a word as he stared back at her.
"Oh, how cute. Little nerd has a crush on ya, Munson!"
"Looks like someone has a date on Friday."
"Atta boy, another one on the list."
"I uh..uh" Eddie stuttered
"Do you think he's actually going to say yes?"
The crowd around them got bigger as the school watched.
Y/N felt his friend's words stab her in the chest. Now she felt like she wanted to throw up. Her eyes watered as she looked around, everyone was staring and waiting for Eddie's reaction.
"Are you going to say something?" She meant it as a question, but it sounded like a plea. Like she was pleading him to tell them they were wrong and that they had something. That their moments meant something to him.
Y/N saw the Eddie she knew disappear in his eyes, and she knew he was going to land the final blow. She stepped back as she tried to brace herself.
"Do I know you?" Eddie asked, he pretended to look confused as his friends laughed.
"Eddie, don't," she whimpered, but it didn't matter. It was popularity or her, and she knew it wasn't a fighting chance.
"Look, sweetheart. I am flattered, but there is no way in hell I'd ever go out with you." Eddie smirked as his friends nudged him and they all fist-bumped behind his back.
Y/N didn't say a word, she nodded sadly and turned around. She pushed through the crowd as the tears slipped down.
"Oh, poor baby is even crying!" A girl's voice announced, then laughs followed.
Y/N shoved the tickets in the trash before she ran out.
Eddie was dead to her.
~
Eddie gulped as she raced off. His friends still hyped him up as he felt the hallways closing in on him. He stepped forward as she threw the tickets in the trash, but he stopped.
He felt guilty, he felt so fucking guilty. He wanted more than anything to spend his Friday night singing along to his favorite band with the cutest girl he'd ever met. To hold her hand as they walked in, to dance like idiots during their favorite song, and to talk about it for days after.
But he panicked. He wasn't supposed to like someone like her.
~~~
After Y/N embarrassed herself in front of the whole school, her life went to hell.
She couldn't walk in the halls without people laughing and pointing.
She dreaded music class. She kept her head down whenever she walked in, she felt his eyes burn into her. But she refused to look in his direction. She should have known Eddie would only like her behind her bedroom door. She should have known he was incapable of liking her shamelessly.
The cafeteria was loud as Y/N walked to her table, Robin was already sitting and picking at her lunch.
"Hey Y/N!"
Y/N looked over her shoulder, she groaned when she realized it was coming from Eddie's table.
"Turns out Eddie does wanna see Dio!"
Y/N looked to Eddie who kept his head down. She looked back at his friend confused.
"Just with a hot cheerleader, not you!"
The table erupted in laughter as she bit her lip. She knew Eddie wouldn't speak up so she turned around and walked to her table.
"I'm sorry they are dicks," Robin said as Y/N sat down.
"It's whatever." Y/N shrugged
"Um Y/N?"
Y/N looked up and was shocked to see Eddie standing there. She looked behind him and noticed his table was watching.
"Yeah?" She asked quietly, it hurt to even look at him.
"I'm so sorry for everything," he whispered.
"Is it like a trap?" she asked confused, as she suspiciously looked back at his table.
"No, I just re-"
"Whatcha doing here, lover boy?" Eddie's friend appeared next to him.
"I was...umm" Eddie nervously stuttered, the panic in his body again. He looked at Y/N's sad face and back to his friend's accusing one.
"Not trying to talk her up, are you?" His friend asked with a chuckle.
"No, of course not! I was just telling her to stop calling me. Chick won't leave me alone." Eddie faked laughed. His friend seemed to believe him, laughing with him, as they walked back to their table.
Eddie looked over his shoulder and mouthed "Sorry" but Y/N rolled her eyes.
~~~
Even if Eddie agreed to go to the concert, he wouldn't have been able to go.
Instead of sulking in his room about his poor decisions, he was stuck in the upside down.
"Dustin and Eddie you go to the trailer and lure them to you. Then the second the bats come, get back inside the trailer. Do not come out!" Steve said, his finger pointed at Dustin.
The group went to their positions and prayed their plan would work.
~
"QUICK WE NEED TO CREATE MORE NOISE TO LURE THE BATS AWAY FROM EDDIE AND DUSTIN!" Steve screamed.
"I KNOW WHAT TO DO!" Robin yelled as she grabbed the radio.
~
A panicked Dustin screamed over the radio as the bats began to chip parts of the trailer away. Eddie tried to swallow his fear but he knew this was it. He lived his life, did he have any regrets? So damn many.
He hated that he couldn't fix things with Y/N. He hated that she wouldn't get the closure she deserved, she wouldn't get the apology Eddie had been practicing for weeks.
If he knew his life was going to end so short, he wouldn't have wasted it on popularity. He would have picked her.
Eddie closed his eyes as he felt the cold air rush in, the bats were loud as they began to swarm into the trailer. He cried out as the bats clawed and nipped at his skin. He yelled for Dustin to run and not stop.
Eddie wasn't sure who to pray to but he did. He prayed as his clothes were torn and he felt blood rushing down his chest.
Then suddenly, the bats stopped.
A loud ring of music began to blast, Eddie knew he left his guitar on the top, and the sound wasn't coming from it.
The bats raced out and chased the sound.
"Who's doing that?" Dustin asked
"I have no idea. You okay?" Eddie asked, checking on him before he grabbed his weapons.
"Yes. Let's go!" Dustin said as he climbed out of the trailer.
Along with the bats, Eddie and Dustin raced. Eddie ran as fast as he could and Dustin jumped on his bike.
Eddie ignored all the pain he felt as he kept running. As he got closer, he realized it wasn't a song. It was the same few chords over and over.
And Eddie knew those chords.
Eddie felt even more panic in his chest as he guessed who was playing it. In a selfish way, he hoped it was someone else. It was wrong but he prayed it was someone in the group, and not her.
"WHO IS THAT?" Dustin screamed as he threw down his bike and prepared his weapons.
"It's Y/N," Eddie gulped as his eyes took in the sight of Y/N playing the guitar. She didn't have any protection, simply standing in her normal clothes as she risked herself for everyone stuck in the upside down.
For a second, everything was silent. The guitar stopped. Eddie's eyes caught hers. Both stared at each other as time slowed.
"I FORGIVE YOU!" Y/N screamed, the tears flowed down her cheeks as she threw the guitar to the ground.
"NO!" Eddie screamed, but it was too late. The bats already found her. Her body was taken to the ground as she screamed in horror.
"GET HELP!" Eddie screamed at Dustin, he didn't look back at him. He just ran to her.
He started swinging everywhere, he heard thuds and screeches. Eddie used every ounce of anger and hurt that his body held as motivation to swing the shit out of these blood suckers. The agony screams coming from Y/N's lips made him move faster.
Dustin called for help on the radio, he wasn't going to leave them alone. He quickly joined Eddie and began to swing.
Eddie didn't have time to yell at him, in the moment he was grateful the kid didn't listen to him. Together they cleared the path towards her. Eddie thought he felt the greatest amount of fear, but when her screams stopped he knew he was wrong.
~
Y/N felt like she finally caught her breath. She gasped as her eyes opened. Bright white lights shined above her that caused her to shut them again.
"Y/N?" She heard a relieved voice say then a warm hand intertwined with hers.
She slowly opened her eyes, a familiar brown eyes looked back at her. He was covered in dirt, blood stained clothes but he still was the prettiest man she'd ever seen.
"Hm, even in heaven you look the same." She said, her voice cracking with every word.
Eddie laughed and grabbed some water. He softly put it against her lips and helped her lift her head to drink.
"Well you haven't made it there yet." Eddie joked. "You had all of us scared."
Y/N looked around the room, but no one else was there. "You are the only one here."
Eddie scratched his head, "they were, but the nurse said only one person at a time, and well I called dibs for six hours." He said as he looked at his watch.
"Why?" She asked, from what she's learned he wanted nothing to do with her.
"I know it's incredibly hard to believe, but I have feelings for you. I know I've been a dick to you and I'm sorry for all the pain I caused. It's pathetic that it took you nearly dying to grow balls and be honest. But before you showed up, I was positive I was going to die. And all I thought about in that moment was how you deserved an apology and that I regretted not taking my chance with you." Eddie confessed. His hands were still in hers as he sat on the chair next to her bed. His eyes were red, and his cheeks were wet.
"It is pathetic, Munson." Y/N snapped, but she kept her hands in his. His touch was warm and soft, a feeling that reminded her she was still alive.
Her heart wanted to hug him and cry. But her head wanted her to keep her pride and tell him to fuck off.
"Did you mean it? When you said you forgave me?" Eddie choked out, sniffling back his tears.
"I prepared to die and I didn't want to ruin your life even more." Y/N confessed, sadness flood through her body as she remembered how worthless she felt because of him. He was the only person in her life that made her feel loved, but hated at the same time. In the end, that was the only experience she had with love and she was okay to die with that in mind because at least it was someone she'd die for.
"You never ruined my life!" Eddie promised, his wet lips kissed her hand as he sobbed. "You are a gift in my life, okay? I've never felt so happy around someone and so alive. I'm an idiot and I made all the wrong decisions. But I swear on my life, I'll make this up to you if you give me a chance. I love you."
Y/N snapped her head as she felt her heart race. The machine gave it away as it beeped.
"You love me?" She whispered, tears flowing down her face as she looked into his eyes.
The Eddie she knew was behind them.
"So damn much. I know I don't deserve anything and I definitely don't deserve you. But I'll do it all right this time. It'll be us and that's all I want."
"Is that why you saved me?" She choked out, she remembered his arms carrying her as he screamed for help. The fear in his eyes and the panic in his voice. He didn't have to come save her, but he did.
"The second I heard those chords, my heart fell out of my chest and my only goal was to get to you before the bats did. I'm very angry with Robin for putting you in that position, but she knew you'd do it to save me. And you deserve someone who'd save you back."
Y/N didn't say anything, she unlaced her hand from Eddie's. He tried to ignore the disappointment he felt.
She sat up slowly then placed her hands on Eddie's cheeks, before he knew it, she leaned in and smashed her lips on his. He felt his stomach flip a thousand times as he reached forward to hold her waist. He kissed her back with everything he had left in him. The kiss tasted of blood and dirt, but it was the best kiss he's ever had.
After a few moments, she pulled away and gasped for air. Eddie leaned his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed as he tried to memorize the feeling of her lips on his.
"I love you too." She whispered, before her lips attached to his again.
Eddie meant everything he said. He was going to prove he was worthy of her and her love.
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Tags!
@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt
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spideysbruh · 28 days ago
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happier than ever
a/n- love shawn, but he was a lil bitch for a while LMAOOO
~
y/n just posted a story!
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caption- my love 😍😍
@y/n just tweeted- dave franco is a different type of fine in now you see me 😩
@ynsmuse replied- IT RHYMES WITH GRAPE.. it rhymes with grape 😔😔
@ynssweet replied- no literally he's so cute
@y/n replied to @ynssweet- LIKEEEE he can perform any illusion he wants on me idccc
@y/n just tweeted- sexiest movie of the year might be Dune tbh... literally just bc oscar isaac is naked and in distress... and then his Hot Son has to take over. can't wait for part two!!!
@dunetimmy replied- YESSS YOU GET IT
@laurieslaurence replied- what did you think of timmys performance
@y/n replied to @laurieslaurence- oh he's amazing. everything he's been in ive enjoyed so so much !!
@shawnmendes just tweeted- "There is a distinct, awful pain that comes with loving someone more than they love you" — Steve Maraboli
@yndefensesquad replied- boy bye- he always does this bs
@shawnyn replied- you're doing wayyy too much bro😭😭
@ynsjacket replied- she's always talked a lot on here to us... don't act surprised ? 😭
@ynssabs replied- is he a child 💀
@ynsshoes replied- she's gotta be tired of shawn's insecurity atp 😭😭 god forbid she has a celeb crush 🙄
@ynshawn replied to @ynsshoes- or god forbid someone wants their girlfriend to be loyal
@ynsheadphones replied to @ynshawn- loyal ?!?!!! girl she's not out there sucking their dicks, be so fucking fr 💀💀 just cause they're celebs doesn't mean they still can't think someone is attractive
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liked by tchalamet, rachelzegler and 3,177,388 others
y/n 🌦🌦
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shawnmendes do u need a jacket
y/n where's yours at?
busyyn no way he said that 💀
finesseyn hello????
ynscurtains y/n girl STAND UPPPPPP LEAVE HIM
ynslipgloss this picture has changed the trajectory of my life btw
amyxlaurie she has timothée chalamet liking her posts and she's still w mr canadian 😭😭😭 get yourself a french man !!!
loveryn HE CAN LITERALLY TREAT YOU BETTERRRRRRRR 🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶
tchalamet liked
rachelzegler HOT SEXY BEAUTIFUL GORGEOUS
ynbilliestan @shawnmendes is it so hard to do this ???
@y/n just tweeted- I'm actually a big believer in being mean to men. Especially if they give you sooooo many reasons for it.
@billieyn replied- every day he does or says some shit that pisses me off even more. props to you girl.
@exesyn replied- DUMP HIM PLEASE
@lunchyn replied- we got your back girl fuck him 😭
@souryn replied- you deserve better...
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liked by y/n and 982,277 others
shawnmendes !!! new song out tonight
view all 23,287 comments
lostinshawn yall are too cute
ynscat how has she been w him for three years, she can do sm better!!!!
shawnswoods his promo is always so bad 😭😭💀
y/n heyyy it's me
ynsdefender lowkey feel like he uses her for likes... hate to say it but 💀
ynsbeatbox i agree!! he never posts her otherwise 😭😭
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liked by tchalamet, billieeilish and 3,165,726 others
y/n what really matters
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nonsenseyn did you and shawn FINALLY break up pls say yes omg
shawnmendes love you
ynsmuse he didn't even like the post what da hell
ynsdove she didn't like his comment either 💀
featheryn GAG HIMMMMMMMMM DROP HIMMMMM DATE LITERALLY ANYONE ELSEEEE
rachelzegler i love you ❤️
y/n i love you more 🥺🫶🫶
rachelzegler should we kiss?
@ynupdates just tweeted- RECENTLY ‼️‼️ While Shawn Mendes was meeting fans, he let it slip that he is now single. Him and y/n have seemingly broken up after a 3 year relationship.
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@monayn replied- FINALLY GIRL DAMN
@huffleyn replied-good for her he's a loser
@snlyn replied- three years.... I hope she's okay :(
@ynsdress replied- "let slip" girl yk he said that shit on purpose so ppl start talking ab him and that shitty ass song he released a couple months ago don't pmo
@ynsblanket replied- the way no one gaf ab shawn 💀😭😭
@shawnmendes just tweeted- I didn't want to make it a whole big thing. But yes, me and Y/n broke up a few months ago. I have seen so many horrible accusations about me, basically saying I was a shitty boyfriend. Me and y/n loved each other, it was simply time for our relationship to end. That's it. That's the full story, to say it was because of anything else is just ignorant.
@ynsback replied- y/n is too classy to respond, so we'll never rly know the full story 😭 but we all saw how you acted w her...
@shawnfan replied- we love you!!!
@ynsheadphones replied- omg he sucks.
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liked by tchalamet, yourfriend and 3,277,388 others
y/n give me a day or two to think of something clever...
comments on this post have been limited
tchalamet love that song
liked by y/n
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liked by y/n, kidcudi and 3,277,388 others
tchalamet 😝😝
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chalshal bro posted this for y/n for SUREEE 💀💀
afteryn bros trying to be mysterious and nonchalant sooo bad 💀
dunesarrakis he's so cuteeee
~~~
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liked by tchalamet, sabrinacarpenter and 2,029,327
y/n in new york, you can try things
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tchalamet who took this picture you look so cute
y/n some really weird dude idfk
chappellyn DID YALL SEE THOSE PAPARAZZI PICS
fasttimesyn WE'RE OUT OF THE TRENCHES FINALLYYY
dontsmileyn how a boyfriend SHOULD act.... @ sh*wn
lookingatyn new york.... timothée... HMMMMM
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- 🏞
@chalametupdates just tweeted- Timothée and Y/n L/n seen recently walking around New York City by fans.
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@slimyn replied- BOOM SHAKALAKA YES LORDDDDD
@timmysgreeneyes replied- stop they're so cute
@laurieslaurence replied- MY PARENTSSSS
@ynslaurie replied- SUCHHHHHH an upgrade from shawn ugh thank god
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liked by y/n and 3,276,837 others
tchalamet like a rolling stone
view all 111,929 comments
y/n wowzers
liked by tchalamet
tchalamet y'know what, hell yeah
y/n my favorite actor, singer, basketball player, ARTISTTT
liked by tchalamet
bilabyn i love seeing y/n in love
timmysgreeneyes so excited for this movieee
y/n just posted a story!
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caption- 💤
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liked by y/n, zendaya and 2,777,388 others
tchalamet 👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻
view all 98,277 comments
junoyn the emoji 💀💀💀💀
ynsbeatbox soooo refreshing to see her w someone who isn't afraid or ashamed to post about her
ynscat the way shawn would've neverrrrrr posted that second pic 💀 he seemed so conservative it was weird
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liked by tchalamet, rachelzegler and 3,377,838 others
y/n pretty, four time golden globe nominated boy
view all 101,377 comments
tchalamet i love you
tchalamet how did i get so lucky
ynshoodie iktrrrr
timmyxyn mbn to show off your man who's actually talented and gives the same energy as you
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- early mornings 🌄 😍😍
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liked by 781,287 people
shawnmendes changed man. out now.
view all 3,277
lonesomeyn BYEEE
sabxyn bro thinks going out to the forest will make him a better person 💀💀
lauriejo the likes 💀💀💀 the comments 💀💀💀💀💀💀
pauldune can somebody PLEASE lmk if the song is good 😭
ynbillie be fr 💀
yndefender the lyrics are so... she doesn't want you bro 🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- 😍😍😍😍😍🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🥰🥰🥰🤭🤭🤭🤭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️👩🏽‍🤝‍👨🏻
@y/n just tweeted- L O L. I'm the happiest ive ever been. let's just leave it at that. happier than ever !!!!!!
@spideyyn replied- it's disgusting to see how he's using yalls relationship for clicks and streams almost two years later, he knows ppl will start talking again
@dreamyn replied- im sorry that he's milking ts. he's so fucking weird
@hummingbirdyn replied- AND I DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT YOU ON THE INTERNET NEVER TOLD ANYONE ANYTHING BADDDDDDD 🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣
y/n just posted a story!
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caption- i think i got an ex but i forgot himmm
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liked by tchalamet, yourfriend and 4,277,837 others
y/n i think you're gonna change my plans
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tchalamet hold on im trying spell gorjos
y/n liked
staryn WITH THOSE EMERALDDDD EYES
finneas im honored
tchalamet we take the best pictures of each other
butteryn i love seeing her in a healthy relationship, where the feelings are reciprocated 🥺😭😭
tchalamet so do i
tearyn HELLO ?!!
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liked by y/n, zendaya and 4,727,288 others
tchalamet yeah, no big deal, just the hottest girl in the world loves me.
comments on this post have been limited
y/n who is she 👿
liked by tchalamet
y/n i know an office quote when I see it
liked by tchalamet
tchalamet yeah cause we just finished watching that ep
y/n i love you more than anything
liked by tchalamet
y/n did you only give me permission to comment 💀💀😭😭😭
tchalamet ....yeah. 😁😁😁
*
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harryshouseenthusiast · 2 months ago
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I want to make a list of my favorite writers on here! This will be the author’s whose writing speaks to me the most! To add, just because I didn’t add someone doesn’t mean I don't like them, I will try my best to update this because i haven't used Tumblr as much recently so I'm still finding all the pages. And i want to write something about each author so I'll take time <3
@jawllines - I’ve read her writing for YEARS and subbed to her Patreon, I love all her tropes so much, especially Grumpy Harry! She is definitely and Og for me, I haven't read fanfics as long as I've been a fan, and I've read like the 1D preferences, but my first full out one-shot was the one where Harry and Y/N pick berries as a summer job.
@moonchildstyles - I love all the AU she chooses to write Harry in, I found her a bit more recently 2022, which now writing that looks so long ago but feels recently 😭 I love how she has so many blurbs/checkups too! i am subbed to her patron as well! I love the gentleness of how she writes harry, especially in citrine, he is so soft and i love it
@jarofstyles - Not only do they have mouthwatering smut, but I love how they have a bunch a shorter AU blurbs, sometimes I don't want to read a full one shot, and they have so many blurbs. One writing love in particular is Braking plates, I love some good angst to fluff. I am also subbed to their Patreon
@erodasfishtacos -I absolutely love her work and it's so upsetting how she was treated on this app. I'm glad she was able to move over to patron to continue her passion, I have subbed, and her work is phenomenal. She introduced me to one of my favorite underrated tropes, Deaf!H. I love how she writes her ABO tropes, that's another one of my favorites.
@harrysbabycherry - The first fic I read from her was the one when Y/N was a vampire and the was a kinda unique topic for me because I've always read Fics of Vampire!H, one of my fav tropes, But I loved the switch up. And I've just really e njoyed her following works. I also love the few Halloween writings she did, i love spooky H.
@gurugirl - The first thing I read of hers was the Stepdad!H, and I was hooked her smut is divine, absolutely amazing. I love how she portrays dark harry and forbidden/taboo relationships. I would love to sub to her patron, but unfortunately, I can't fit it into my budget as of now, but I will be subscribing one day. I love how she specifically says no sad endings because i also get too attached and cannot handle it.
@harryforvogue - It's been a bit since I've read her work, so I'm excited to catch up. She is actually the account that got me into reading books with OC. I previously only read reader insert Fics, but her writing was so good, and I noticed that OC writings give me different emotions than Y/N Fics. if that makes sense.
@watermelonlovershigh - I absolutely love how she writes soft Harry. She writes him so gentle and caring. It’s a nice contrast for the mafia stuff I read😭. She was also the first person ive read a sickfic from and I don’t see many of those, so it was different than what I’ve normally read and I loved it! She’s an amazing writer.
As i said i will be adding to this as time goes on! If anyone has someone the want me to check out lmk!
(Sorry for typos)
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ariiadnes · 2 months ago
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╭ ⿻ ・ TENDING TO THEIR INJURIES ( part iv. )
ଓ.° ・ wriothesley ・ neuvillette. genshin impact. repost. ・ ・ ・ pt i. pt ii. pt iii.
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❀ ゚. ༄ wriothesley
wriothesley is far too familiar with getting injured on the job. it's nothing new, not really-- what's work if he doesn't get a little roughened up, anyway? it's certainly not a big deal ( to him, at least ).
he'll admit that some days are worse than others, but he's got too much to do, too much to protect. he can't afford to let anyone take him down. so all in all? he'll be fine. end of story.
you, on the other hand? he's not really sure. he's warned you from time to time that he's bound to run into trouble here and there; the fortress is not a place of innocence, after all, and you are both all too aware of that.
still, that doesn't stop you from mentally combusting every time he walks through the door, cuts and bruises all across his body. unfortunately, tonight is no different, even if his injury ( if anyone can even consider it to be one ) is a small cut on his cheek.
"jail. jail for a thousand years."
it's three in the morning, and yeah, he's a little sleep deprived, so he's not really sure if he heard you correctly. he blinks a few times, brows knit ever so slightly as he tries to register your words.
huh.
he's far more used to a lecture, but he'll take this instead.
"a thousand years?" he grins, though the amusement fades slightly as you use a washcloth to wipe the blood away. "that's a little cruel. seriously, do you think you could survive that long without seeing me?"
"guess we'll see."
he lets out a chuckle, though he sees through your annoyance. it may be a simple cut to him, but to you, it runs deeper and he knows that. he chooses to keep his silence instead of continuing the banter, only watching you carefully as you study him in search of other injuries you may have missed.
"i miss you when i'm gone for a thousand minutes." he leans in, closes that small distance between you two. "don't send me away." he murmurs. "i won't survive."
you don't say anything for a long while, a small sigh escaping through parted lips. it's his unique way of asking for forgiveness; of course you'll grant it. but you're just as stubborn as he is, so you don't quite give him the satisfaction or peace of mind that he expects.
you kiss him for a moment too short, then speak.
"how many hours is a thousand minutes?"
❀ ゚. ༄ neuvillette
neuvillette is not accustomed to the woes of human emotion. it is a fickle thing, he muses, and the nature of one's heart is a complexity he wishes to understand with ease. he tries, but there are so many variables and constants that even the ludex of fontaine cannot grasp it.
he is, admittedly, always a little doubtful of himself when it comes to such interactions. he is careful in his approach-- certainly not wary, but careful in the means of not causing offense. he is learning with time, after all, and though he has learned much through experience and through you, there is much he still remains naive to.
but this-- this, he understands : the silence that weighs heavy in the air, the lack of words so often spoken when you are together, the way your eyes won't meet his. your gaze is focused elsewhere as you throw all concentration into putting away the antiseptic and spare bandages, carefully organizing the supply kit in the most optimal manner in case of emergency. he is not sure how long you spend rearranging it, but surely it is a means of distraction to distance yourself from your feelings.
"thank you." neuvillette speaks up after a long while, notices how you pause at his gratitude. your body tenses up for the slightest moment, but you are quick to force yourself to relax.
"you're welcome."
he is unsure of how to proceed at this point. it is not often that he gets injured; such occasion is truly rare, but it is not something always in his control. he understands you are worried. he understands that you are afraid, that you might be angry. he wishes to speak, but when he hears that little sniffle, he freezes.
"please, look at me."
you listen. when he looks at you, there is something strange that stirs in his heart-- something so softly devastating at the sight of your sorrow. he hesitates, wonders if he will do the right thing to comfort you.
his hand cups your cheek, thumb wiping away the tear that trails down your face. there is the gentle curve of the lips-- a subtle reassurance, quiet in its nature, but deeply resonant.
"do not waste your tears on me." he tells you, gentle. "i'm alright. so long as the tides continue to turn, i will be here."
he presses a kiss to your forehead, smile growing ever so faintly as your tears continue to fall. it is something that cannot be helped; he knows this more than anyone, this weeping dragon. he pulls you into his arms, and until the tears are no longer shed, he will not let you go.
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imaginecolby · 1 year ago
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prove it || c.b.
summary: after an argument between you, colby promises you that he'll do whatever it takes to get you to forgive him. requested by anonymous.
"i'm so tired of having this conversation with you! if you can't trust me, then we shouldn't even be in this relationship anymore!" you shouted, storming upstairs.
"you don't get to storm away from me in my house!" colby said, following closely behind you.
"well, maybe you should actually listen to me for once, and i won't have to storm off. i don't know how many more times i need to tell you that i don't want you for your clout, or your money. the faster you understand that, then the faster this fight can be over." you took a deep breath before speaking again. "colby, we have been going at this all day. i'm tired of fighting. until you get can get it through your head that i want to be with you, then i can't do this anymore."
you finished packing your things up, and made your way to your car to leave. you half expected colby to come running after you, but when he didn't, you finally let yourself cry. you drove back to your house in silence, letting the tears fall. this was the only thing that you and colby ever fought over, but after the fourth time having this fight, you didn't have it in you to continue to argue over it.
after a quick stop for food, you finally made it home. you sat on the couch, crying as you ate. you really were worried this was gonna be the end of your relationship, but you knew that you couldn't be part of a relationship where someone didn't trust you. you deserved better than that, and you weren't going to continue to put yourself through that.
a few hours passed with no word from colby. you figured you wouldn't hear from him tonight, and forced yourself to try to sleep. unfortunately, that proved to be easier said than done. you tossed and turned all night, mind racing with images of your night replaying in your head.
"god, this sucks." you sighed. you slept for a total of about two hours, and it hit you bad the next day. you moped your way through work, barely talking to anyone, or getting any work done. everyone was trying to get you to open up, and offer some comfort, but you weren't in the mood. you were just trying to get through the next few days, in case this was really the end. once you were finally off of work, you made your way home, and stepped straight into the shower. you sat in the bottom of the tub, letting the warm water massage your muscles, and washing away the stress from the day.
after your shower, you put on some pajamas and moved to the couch, turning on a movie. you rolled your eyes as all of your recommendations were romantic comedies that you were not in the mood for. you ended up turning on an action film that you ended up not paying much attention to. you spaced out as you ate your leftovers, feeling numb. you were all cried out, and now longer knew what to feel.
"god this has been the worst few days." you sighed, turning the tv off. you sat in silence for a while before there was knock on the door. you got up to the answer door, colby standing on your porch.
"hey." he said quietly. you stood there, your arms crossed across your chest, saying nothing. "can we talk?" you turned to move back into your house, colby following closely behind you. you say back on the couch, and he sat on the chair across the living room for you.
"talk about what? just so you can talk down on me some more? you've made it abundantly clear that i don't come from the same world as you and that i don't understand how the industry works." you spat, mimicking his voice. "news flash, i knew that when we met, and i knew that when we got together. you don't need to continue to make me feel bad about it."
"i know, i'm sorry. sometimes i just get too into my head about all this. you're the first real girlfriend ive had since i've been in LA, and im still having trouble figuring this out." he said softly.
"you can't continue using that as an excuse whenever you blow up at me. i understand you're having a hard time figuring this out, but sometimes it feels like you don't understand how badly it hurts when you say things like that to me. it makes me feel like you don't trust me and that you don't want to be with me."
"god, i'm such an idiot. i never want you to feel that way. i love you, and i love everything about us. i never want to make you feel like that i don't care about you, or i don't trust you. i regret that i ever did that to you, and i want to do everything i can to fix this."
"well, an apology is a start. but i need you to prove that you actually believe that and you do trust me."
"i do, and i will. i am so so sorry that i ever made you feel like i didn't want to be with you or that i didn't trsut that you were with me for the right reasons. i love you. i love you more than anything, and i want to be with you." he said, moving to sit next to you.
"i love you too." you said, pulling him into your arms. you hugged him tight and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.
"i'm sorry." he said again, looking up at you. "so so sorry."
"i know. and i accept your apology. and all the future ones i expect from you." you teased.
you and colby spent the rest of the night together, finally feeling better after the last couple of days. you hoped that things would continue to be good for you and colby, and you would stay in a good place for a while. maybe forever.
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landograndprix · 1 year ago
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「Feel the magic ๛ l.n」
part iv
✧.* though you're still struggling with yourself and your relationship with lando, life is good or at least, that's what you think.
✧.* I like when reader suffers, like yes babes, cry a bit more 🥰 Toxic friends once again? Uh, yes please 🥰 this is a psa for the people who wanted to be on my taglist but never got tagged, i didn't forget or ignore you, I simply am unable to tag you and therefore removed you from the list feel free to ask me again so I can take a look at it. Taglist is open Love ya ❤️
✧.* prev part - next part
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landonorris
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liked by carlossainz55, riabish and 654,897 others
landonorris 🧡
view all 1,678 comments
byelandooo well that's one way to hard launch lmfao
landitosainz great way to ruin a team 💀🤮
cecilemoulin wrong account you gremlin
norrisbae such a lando thing to do 😭
norry4 you're telling me lando's got a private insta too? what y'all hiding for us? 👀
maxfewtrell don't think this was meant to be posted here but where's the credit for the pictures mate?
johnnyp lucky son of a bitch
milouberger muppets 🧡
norrizz no but this is exactly how I imagined this relationship to go, just a bunch of idiots together 😭
carlandooo muppet and his crack head 🥰
mrsnorris 🤮
charlos16 man's really said hard launch
smoothoperatorr this is wrong on so many levels 🤡
carlossainz55 happy for you guys!
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y/nusername posted to their story
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mclaren
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liked by landonorris, y/nusername and 187,672 others
mclaren first race of the season is done! 🏁 we can confirm..it was a good weekend!
tagged: landonorris, y/nusername
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teammclaren we are so back baby!
freddiem y/n would've had pole if Milou didn't impend her like crazy
julieeeexo milou was not having y/n this weekend..first the impending, then nearly pushing her off the track during the race..
norrizz nah she was aggressive! We could've had a double podium!
norrislando p2 and p4 baby!!
matty28 the team bringing mclaren back to the front 👏
carlitonorris what's up with milou? Is she jealous because lando's and y/n's relationship seems to work out perfectly and hers and charles' didn't? 💀
chilisainz exactly what I was thinking 🤡
y/nloveee we could've had both of them on the podium but p4 for the babe is amazing too! 🧡
julianklein she's washed up, it's time for her to retire. outperformed by her teammate.
y/nloveee so everyone who's outperformed by their teammate today is washed up? Okay, cool, can't wait to see half the grid retire next week 🤡
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gossipf1
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gossipf1 we didn't have to wait long for the proof to be posted, these pictures of Carlos and y/n have been circulating the internet since last night. Who shared the pictures is unknown.
view all 315 comments
chilisainz considering these are very personal pictures and not random paparazzi shots, I'm willing to bet money on one of their friends leaking them..won't be the first time y/n gets screwed over like that..
carlandooo no because i think you're right 😔
charlessainz no but why are they actually giving?
leclerc_16 but why do they look so cute together? 👀
norrismax I can't be the only one finding this extremely uncomfortable..why would someone leak these pictures..you can't trust anybody anymore..
jamoniconico can't she just leave these drivers alone? 🤨
joeyy000 these men really out here pulling the baddest girl on the grid..
carlito55 see I prefer this duo over whatever lando and y/n is..
verstappencharles yes!!!!
maxmaxmax imagine being lando and seeing this and reading people prefer Carlos over you 😔
brocadesmerc why does she feel the need to date every single driver on the grid? Who's next, Charles? Esteban?
hammertime considering her ex Thomas is spanish too, I'd guess she's got a type and it's not french 😭
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milouberger posted to their story
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Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @f1lover55
Feel the magic taglist: @celesteblack08 @mrsmaybank13 @cha-hot @judesgfirl @roseseraj @kissesandmartinis @jpg3 @amulhermaisfelizdomundo @marialovesf1 @silkenthusiasts @luvrrish @laneyspaulding19 @emily-b @formula1bby @judespoisons @buckybarnessweetheart @strawberrychita @iifloweringnightsii @buendiabebeta @jjsprobablywrong
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10
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fulgrims-big-naturals · 4 days ago
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Blood raven brings you food
its the thing i said i'd do but it took me very long because ive been having random heart palpitations and that makes me scared to take my adhd meds so i didnt start it out proper so here's this out of chronology snapshot instead
oh also @slippi-the-magos
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"hello little songbird, I'm back"
You hear Ulysses cooing from the other side of the locked door along with the clinking of keys.
"i got you something~” He is singsonging with excitement, he must think you’ll like this one.
He always gets you something. A silver bracelet, some soft dresses, a book in a language you don't understand (you haven't told him you can't read it), a disk that makes rainbows when it catches the light, every day there is a new trinket for you. And food too. Three whole meals a day, with the good corpse starch, the one with the added protein. The door opens, pushing aside some rumpled fabrics by it as Ulysses steps into the room. He turns to lock the door again before flashing you a smile.
You swallow your unease to greet him “welcome back my lord” you’re trying your best to sound sweet, but the trans human dread you feel still has weight in your throat and your shoulders. Ulysses eyes light up at your voice, and grows a smile at the title.
“Thank you, you’re so sweet” he replies “and round! You’re so round and soft” he walks over to your bed and pulls you onto his lap, bringing a bag up next to you. “Look, look, I got you oranges”
The bag is full of orange spheres. They smell sweet. You furrow your brow at his excitement. They are nice, yes, but are not very intriguing.
“Do you not like oranges?” Ulysses asks, shifting his weight under you impatiently.
“Oh- no, no, I do! Thank you my lord” you have no idea what these are.
“Oh sweet thing, they’re fruits, you eat them” Ulysses giggles and plants a kiss on the top of your head. “Didn’t you know?”
“No my lord” you answer sheepishly. You still don’t know what a fruit is, but it is probably best not to ask your lord too many questions. You’ve yet to see Ulysses in a bad mood and you don’t want today to be the day you do.
Ulysses takes an orange for himself and bites into it. Seeing him, you do the same. It prickles your mouth, you wrinkle your nose up at the taste. Such a sweet smelling thing tastes so bitter. And it’s wet in the inside, like a very strange egg.
“Oh, you don’t like them.” Ulysses says disappointedly.
Your stomach drops. What would one of his angels do if you turned down his gifts? Your lord spent some of his immortal life to dote on someone undeserving like you and you meet him with ungratefulness? You don’t want to think of what he will do. You won’t think of it. You will like oranges damnit.
“No! no I do, I do” you start chomping into the orange again, getting juice all over your nose and chin. The meat of the orange is sweeter. Without the bitter shell you do quite like it. You breathe a sigh of relief and drop your shoulders.
Ulysses observes your orange based panic, and then your orange based acceptance with fascination. “Are you sure?” He cocks his head with the question.
You turn red, embarrassed to have to explain “I, uh, I thought I didn’t like it at first because the peel was so bitter, but the meat inside is sweet, so I do like them. I’m sorry.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry for, I’m sure there is a way to take the peel off”
“I thought you would be angry that I rejected your gift. which I am not doing, my lord, I do like it”
“Well if you didn’t like them, then there’s just be more for me. So it’s a win-win really.”
“Oh”
He’s not mad. He wasn’t mad when you didn’t know what the Rainbow Making Sun Reflector Disk was either. Maybe being stolen wasn’t so bad? Your old lord would never have brought you gifts. And he’d throw a fit if you talked wrong or looked wrong or other reasons you still hadn’t figured out. You’d better stay on guard though, this Blood Raven hasn’t used you for anything yet, but he must’ve taken you for a reason.
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