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risuola · 6 months

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IV — EPIPHANY // Sukuna thought nothing can break him. He's powerful, he has influence and means to always come on top – or at least that's what he thought, because now he realized that he's nohing but weak.

contents: angst, blood, usage of weapon, reader discretion is advised — 2,6k words

a/n: in this part i wanted to give you a little insight into Sukuna's persona. show the menace in him, show the threat and how he is when he's not influenced by weakness that is our precious y/n (aka when he's not confused as hell by what's happening in his heart). i rewrote this part four times before i was finally somewhat satisfied with it.

ᴅᴇᴀᴅʟʏ ᴀᴛᴛʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ | masterlist

You are safe with me.

Sukuna thought about the words with hilarity. The sentence so simple and kind, it felt foreign to realize that his own mouth allowed it out of his system. An odd sort of disdain washed over himself and he found it laughable that throughout his entire career of blood and murder, what made his blood pressure raise up was a lie he told you. A strangely comic amalgamation of letters and syllables that each time he thought of them made him more angry and more amused.

You were safe, technically, or maybe that’s what he wished to believe when he replayed the events of one very unlucky Sunday evening in his memory. It began lovely, too lovely in fact, but he chose to actively ignore the oddity of it – he came to terms with how easily you were able to render his senses useless whenever you came into the field of his view wearing something as pretty as the dress you picked for the date that day. It was in a shade of pink that you deemed similar to the color of his hair, a dusty rose, you called it, and Sukuna wasn’t sure exactly how much truth was that, but he couldn’t care less about it when you looked so drop dead gorgeous. When he watched you walking next to him through the crowded alleys in the park nearby your apartment building, he couldn’t help but notice only you in the mass of people around him. He felt like a teenager in a way, with his heartbeat drumming against his ribcage with pace similar of this after sprinting for long time. You were capable of triggering reactions in his body that he thought were long gone with the days of his youth but he was fine with it. As long as he could witness your beauty, he was fine with everything.

Sukuna laughed gravelly as the sequence of memories played in his mind – the dark sound of his voice causing two police officers outside the bars of his cell to tremble. Oh, how much he hated you and your stupidly breathtaking face for whatever the hell you did to him. If he could, he would tell you what he thinks of it right now and if not careful enough, he might tell you a little too much. Confess maybe. Yeah, he might do that someday. And maybe move out somewhere where you’d truly be safe. Where he wouldn’t feel like a fucking idiot for saying words that are so damn obviously a lie.

Moving out felt like a good idea. In couple of years, when he’s done ruling the criminal forces, he could take you out of Japan, somewhere far away and protect you from any harm. He’d take you somewhere warm, where he could shamelessly admire the way your skin tone looks under the golden rays of sun and the way your eyes shine and glisten like the most expensive and rare gemstones. The thought of you brought a wide smile to his face, as the picture spread in front of his closed eyelids. In the cold of his cell, he could almost feel the burning touch of your fingers tracing the shapes of his body.

* * *

Sixteen days.

It’s been over two weeks since you last saw Sukuna and it was getting harder and harder to go about your days. You missed him. You missed his face, his strong arms that manhandled you around despite your playful taps and tugs. You missed the huskiness of his voice, the low purrs he made in the morning whenever he’d nuzzle his nose against your temple inhaling the scent of your skin that he swore he was addicted to. And above all, you were worried and restless, and scared.

Whenever you closed your eyes, your mind was flooded with memories of the Sunday date you went on with Ryomen. He picked you up and handed you a little bag filled with your favorite mochi – the ones stuffed with fresh strawberries and whipped cream, a delicacy made in only one place in Tokyo and you remember how your heart swelled with warmth and love when you realized he had driven to that shop on the other side of the city just to get you few pieces of sweets. He was wearing his usual, black dress pants and a leather belt, perfectly polished boots and a dark grey sweater that made him look both casual and dangerous, with the tattoos around his wrists exposed under the rolled-up sleeves and his sharp features, that somehow whenever were turned towards you seemed a little bit softer.

You felt like a princess next to him, you felt loved and protected with his large hand enveloping your smaller one in his warm embrace. It was perfect. It was perfect until–

You didn’t exactly pick up what happened and how it happened. Even now as you think of it, you can’t truly recall how that tale-like evening turned into a mess that led you to lose your sleep every night that followed. It was a flash. One second you were leaning into Sukuna’s palm, greedy to steal his warmth and love and next one you were pushed tightly against his chest behind a bench. His hand, that was embracing you with as much delicacy as one would use to touch a doll made of porcelain was suddenly pressed harshly to the side of your head, covering your ear. Someone was shooting, Ryomen was shooting. You felt the impact of each bullet being extracted from his weapon. Each one of the subtle shakes of his muscular body reverberated throughout your smaller frame. You heard guns, despite his effort to protect your eardrums, but the loud explosive sound mixed with screams of people around was loud and clear in your head. An echo of danger and violence that you witnessed firsthand even though the man that held you did everything he could to protect you from the event.

You remember vividly the moment Sukuna groaned and cussed lowly. It followed a soft tremble of his large body and at first you didn’t realize what happened, but then you felt the unexpected wet warmth on one of your hands. “It’s fine, don’t worry,” he was telling you over and over again as your eyes began to water at the realization that one of your palms was covered in blood. His blood.

“It’s just a scratch,” he was lying to you, but you didn’t know it was a lie until you saw him later. The magazine in his gun was empty sooner than you thought it will be and the foreign shooting continued. It seemed like there were few attackers, but you couldn’t tell where all of it was coming from. All you remember was that you stayed hidden in the large body of your lover for the entire time until the police sirens broke the scene.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered to him, doing everything in your power to hold back sobs, as he kept you close to himself. You knew that police couldn’t be good for him and if not for you, he would most likely run away somehow, but he stayed there, behind the bench, holding you tightly and making sure not a single bullet could land on your fragile body.

He didn’t look mad, not even annoyed, when he was telling you what to do next and how to act in the face of what was to come, and even though you had the hardest time registering it through the immense fear you felt regarding his future, you were nodding. He was calm, and you thought that he stayed calm for you because the scene of shooting was enough of a distress for you already. And then, you saw him in handcuffs, with his hands shackled behind his back, guided towards the police car. Cops that were responsible for escorting him looked almost funny next to his towering frame and if he only wanted, he would quite easily throw those officers away. But he didn’t. And he didn’t do it to save you.

You remember the last time you saw him he sent you a smile, more so a smirk, when one of those cops harshly pushed his head down, making sure he got into the car. Few moments later, he was gone and you were left with the mess of the crime scene and the burden of a witness.

Later, you were informed by one of his pawns that it’s not gonna take long, but you knew that things were serious because few days slowly turned into a week and then two weeks and he still was in jail. And you couldn’t go visit him because he said so. You stayed in his house, safe and sound in the bed you always shared with him, except now you were alone and cold. You missed him. And you were worried.

It killed you inside to think Sukuna might face charges. A life sentence, most likely. There was only so much that you knew about his criminal past and you were sure that he kept many secrets from you, that he wanted to save you from the heavy burden of his misdeeds and cruelty. You knew how dangerous his lifestyle was, how dark was the path he chose to fallow and you knew that even someone as strong as him couldn’t escape the jurisdiction forever. But why now?

You couldn’t shake off the devastating feeling of emptiness whenever you wandered between the luxurious interiors of his mansion. It felt like you couldn’t stop worrying, day in and day out you were thinking if he was alright. Was he properly fed? He told you that he won’t contact you while in jail to protect you, but all you wished for was just to hear his voice. You were worried about the way authorities treat criminals of his sort. What will they do to him? The mere thought of torture or interrogation filled you with dread and anxiety. You never felt so alone and helpless.

* * *

It took too long.

In fact, detention took much longer than Sukuna anticipated but time behind the bars was nothing but an entertainment for him. It was amusing, it allowed him to let loose. Surrounded by an air of sadistic satisfaction he didn’t get to experience in years, he played game of pushing and pulling, a game of power. Despite being enclosed and surrounded by dozens of officers and guards, Sukuna had a sense of control over his situation, and it amused him. He was enjoying the misery that he caused others, relished in the fact that he was feared and hated. It made him almost giddy. There was a twinkle in his eye and a playful grin on his lips, he relished the experience.

“I’ve got few questions to you.”

He smirked, sitting smug and relaxed. For the nth time he was questioned; a futile attempt of getting information out of him, yet another display of the illusionary power that authorities thought they had but lacked severely. It made Ryomen laugh out loud each time he sat against a new face, it pleased him, he loved the feeling of having the interrogator’s full attention. Detectives that tried to enforce the law onto him looked tough, each one of them, until they dropped their weight onto the metal chair in the interrogation room. The heaviness of the sinister aura was unnerving to anyone who dared to approach and the criminal enjoyed breaking them one by one.

“Do you?” Sukuna spoke, his voice low and menacing, but bearing a thrill of amusement and excitement. The heavy chains that grounded his frame clinked as he moved just slightly and the shiver that went down the spine of the man in front of him did not escape his watchful eye. “Afraid?”

“Hardly,” a tone of false confidence responded to the question and Ryomen chuckled. To him, this was a game, and he was winning. He found joy in annoying the interrogator, knowing that he couldn’t get anything out of him. It was stimulating, it was fun. It was a game of cat and mouse. It felt euphoric to answer the questions, knowing that his words were confusing, that he was able to mess with the man’s head, make him question his own judgement.

Years and years of being on the top of mafia managed to clear his memory of being vulnerable and the caricature of it that he was now experiencing served for a nice refresher. He felt excitement to play with the law and as he sat there, restrained by metal bounds, he realized why he became a criminal in the first place. The constant chase of thrill and power was what made him who he was.

As the detective sat there, intimidated more and more with each passing second, Sukuna watched the disaster unraveling with a dark glint in his eyes. He enjoyed every moment of the tension and knew that chills were running down the spine of his current opponent. He was imposing, savoring the fear and the exquisite feeling of danger that surrounded him. It was intoxicating, it made him feel alive. He played with the interrogator as if the predator would play with its pray, he stared at him with a small grin of pure evil.

“You’ve been stubborn this whole time,” the officer said, clearing his throat and straightening his spine to make himself appear bigger but to Ryomen, he was merely a source of amusement. The criminal stayed relaxed and leaned forward, slowly closing the distance between his own face of death and the eyes of the person in front of him.

“Was I stubborn?” He questioned, his tone low and menacing and his lips stretched slowly, baring the teeth. “You’ve got me all chained up and still, you can’t get your job done?”

“You’re chained up because of the potential threat you might pose.”

Sukuna laughed. A raspy and low chuckle came from his throat; a dark omen that hung heavy in the air as if signifying the upcoming danger. It was cold and malicious, an ominous showcase of his real persona, of someone who has no compassion and knows no mercy. He felt a twisted sense of satisfaction at the sight of sweat running down the face of the man in front of him. He exuded an aura of fear, leaving everyone in the room unsettled.

“If I only wanted to, I could rip out your throat with my bare teeth.” Ryomen’s voice was low, it was quiet and nearly whisper like but the message it carried was more than enough to freeze the blood inside the veins of the interrogator.

“I assume you’re familiar with the idea of good cop bad cop method,” the man spoke again after a moment of dread. He cleared his throat once more, squared up his jaw.

“And which one are you?”

“Oh, I’m neither, but allow me to show you something,” interrogator reached to the inside pocket of his coat, pulling out a phone with his sweaty palms and pressing down few buttons.

The moment Sukuna looked down on the screen, his expression changed. A ghost of anger washed over his features as he took in the picture. Suddenly, he felt a wave of burning hot filling his veins and reaching his face; a dizzying sensation of dread and rage and then he realized that the power he wielded was nothing. With his eyes fixed on the little phone and his jaw clenched, shaken by the rush of adrenaline and with his knuckles white, Sukuna Ryomen experienced acknowledgement. An epiphany of sorts. The illusion of might and influence burst like a bubble made of soap and slowly he realized that he’s nothing but–

“Seeing something familiar?”

–weak.

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destielfanfic · 2 months

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from the inbox, #13

Here’s another ask from our inbox that gets a special treatment. You can find previous From The Inbox posts here.

Hi! Im looking for a very specific type of fic and would greatly appreciate your help to see if there are any out like this. Its Cas approaching dean with his feelings but dean gently rejects him (could be post canon) and then dean getting insanely jealous when cas interacts with an prospective individual (or when cas starts dating?) Thank you so much!! Ive literally been through so many tags but the situation is so specific it doesnt come up. The only fics that fit this is one fic by sobsicles and in the shadow of your wings.

As I was going through our #supernatural tag to look for fics with this very specific scenario in mind, I came across our previous from the inbox #7 post. Several fics on this post are really close to your requirements but it's not easy to see that. Here they are with some extra comments.

Return to Sender Address Unknown by gedry - one of the oldest fics with fallen Cas, posted during season 5; this is a perfect fit - Cas confesses his feelings and Dean gently lets him down; then life happens.

This Story Was Brought To You By Our Sponsors by scaramouche - alternate season 5 ending. Dean didn't think that that THING between them was serious, and now Cas is gone and Dean has regrets

My heart is beating from me by Enochian Things - season 9, fallen Cas has moved out of the bunker and is getting married. Dean is invited.

Things that Leave Marks by thestoryinsideme - season 9, fallen Cas has learned to live independently, now Dean has to catch up.

In Your Sweet Little Bungalow by annodominique - after Sam dies, fallen Cas is building his life independently, then Dean comes for a visit.

Fics mentioned in the ask:

In the Shadow of your Wings by Enochian Things (Salr323) [M, 57,300 word count]

Dean drains his bottle of beer, sets it on the table and gets up, heading for the kitchen. Maybe to fetch another, maybe to leave. But Castiel doesn’t want him to go, doesn’t want to leave this conversation unfinished; he remembers his regret of just a few hours ago, that Dean had never known how he loved him. “Wait,” he says and gets to his feet as Dean passes by. They’re standing close – close enough that Castiel can feel the heat of Dean’s body, the vibrancy of his soul brushing against his grace. “Dean, I have to tell you something...” Set after the S11 finale.

things happen (they do, they do, and they do) by sobsicles [NC-17, 28,000 word count]

So, the first thing that happens is Castiel comes back. "Right," Dean says eventually, gruffly. He looks down at his shoes. "I'm not gonna tell you how to live your life, man. It's—you know, yours. Do your thing, love who you love, whatever. I can't really stop you from loving me, if that's what you've decided to do, but I don't—I can't—" "I know," Castiel murmurs, still just smiling a little, not looking heartbroken at all. "Don't worry about it, Dean, that's all I ask." "So we're—" Dean risks a glance up, swallowing thickly. "We're good?" Castiel hums. "We're good."

If our followers know a fic that fits this ask, let us know!

Here's some suggestions by @rayraywillis!

An Old Feeling by Orphan_account [T, 1,800 word count]

Castiel thinks Dean will never love him back so he decides to try and move on. Cue jealous!Dean and confessions galore.

Idiot by WanderUntilLost [T. 3,700 word count]

Set after 15.03. Cas left, deciding it was time to move on for him. Dean spirals in the aftermath.

Move On by Halevetica [NR, 9,300 word count]

Dean and Sam haven't seen Cas in weeks. Not since the angel declared it was time for him to move on. However, the brother's run into Cas on a hunt, but he's not alone. Dean struggles to find the words that will undo the damage he's done. He just hopes it's not too late.

#destiel #archive fic rec #from the inbox

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xo-xojj · 5 months

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Theese walls

(gif is not mine)

Oliver Otto x Male Reader

Request: Nope

Desc: Oliver and reader say somethings that if these walls could talk, they would tell them to break up. (song inspo from These Walls-Dua Lipa)

Type: Angst

Warnings: Cursing, Alleged Cheating, Argument, Angst, BitterSweet Ending

Enjoy!

"Ya know what (Y/n) your always on some bs when it comes to me and Cooper" Oliver spat at you. "All Ive asked you was instead of spending so much time with Cooper maybe spend some with your boyfriend" You said. You guys had been arguing in his bed room for about 20 minutes and it wasnt pretty. Insults were thrown left and right. Maybe, you had come off a little jealous. But thats because you were. You fet like he had spent more time with cooper than with you. And it wasn't that you didnt like Cooper. It was just something about him that made you insecure about yourself around cooper. And you possibly felt like you were loosing Oliver.

“Geez (Y/n)! You can be just so dull sometimes.“

Oliver said and while it hurt, you came back quick. “You act like its so easy to find your boyfriend dependable when hes fluid!“ You say bitterly piking at hid oast relationship with Gina, which was a sensitive topic for the boy. He was hurt, of course but nothing could prepare you for what you heard.

“Maybe we should break up......“ Oliver said bitterly. He didnt really mean it. He was just being pissy. But you ended up taking it seriously. You facial expression softened along with his. You quickly got your stuff and flying out the door. He was quickly on your trail with pleads coming out hus mouth for you to stop. He apologized a thousand times. But you didnt listen. You thought its not suposed to hurt this much.

But it did. You ran to your house crying all day long. And you fell asleeo crying.... It was over.

On the other hand, Oliver sat in his chair at his desk with a palm to his head wondering how he could fix this. “If these walls could talk“ Oliver whisperes to himseld. He wasnt stupid, but he really didnt notice you felt that way. You two both had a great poker face when you wanted to. He decided to make things right.

There was a loud knock at your door. It was about 11 at night and it was just you and the dog cooper gave you for your birthday. You jumped as the dog barked. You were scared because people usually dont knock. Especially not around that time of night. You peek through the door too see Oliver. You sighed relived but tensed up at the thought of what happened. You didnt wanna be the one to break it off. You didnt even wanna break it off. “I know you’re in there“ Oliver said as you opened the door. He walked in closing your door behind him. You sat down with him and you guys sat in silence.

That was until it was broken. “im an idiot“ Oliver spoke up. “I didnt mean anything i said back there. (y/n) i just want you to understand how much i love you.“ Oliver your hand. You broke down and cried into his chest. “I know, Im sorry“ He said rocking youu back n forth. He kissed you softly. “We were really toxic back there“ You spoke up. He nodded. “I think we should get couple therapy“ you said. “Whatever you want. I just dont want this to end, baby“ Oliver said holding you close. “And from now on, its me and you. Im willing to do whatever this relationship needs, even if that includes slowing down with Cooper“ Oliver said. “Im willing to do whatever this relationship needs. Even if it includes putting my trust into you more, not that it wasnt already there, but just a little more“ You say giggling. He kisses you smiling and holding you. “I love you, Oli“ you say. “I Love you too, (y/n/n) “ He said smiling. And you fell asleep on the couch with your dog in Olivers lap sleeping with you guys.

💜

#american housewife x male reader #american housewife x reader #american housewife #oliver otto x male reader #oliver otto x reader #oliver otto #cooper bradford #male reader #dua lipa #Spotify

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year

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AITA for kind of being a homewrecker?

some background: i (22f) met this guy (23m, let’s call him rick) freshman year of college, four years ago. we became really close really fast, and we basically had all the same friends (we went to a very small school, it’s hard not to be friends with most people). unfortunately i took a year off of school after freshman year, so i kind of lost contact with all my college friends. when i came back, my friends and i reconnected immediately, but especially rick. we uh… sorta made plans to hook up at that point (we were horny and dumb and mutually attracted enough), but we got to my room and we kissed (which was my first kiss) but it was bad and i changed my mind before anything happened. the thing is, we were still friends after that, and he even told me that he was in love with me and thought that i might fall in love with him. he’s also said multiple times since then that he was being idiotic and that would have been terrible for us, and i agree, so we’re both glad that nothing happened. but since we were now in different grades, we weren’t as close friends, so that year passed without further incident.

fast forward a year (my junior year, his senior) and suddenly we’re getting closer again— we’re in a mutual club and therefore hang out a lot more. i realize at some point in november that oh shit, i have a crush on him. (sidenote— i don’t have crushes. i’d never been in love. ive realized since this that i think i might be on the aromantic/demiromantic spectrum, and i’ve always just said i’m queer because i… have had a very queer experience wrt my romantic/sexual feelings. sooooo.. this was weird). i mention this to another friend, and she informs me that rick had started dating someone.

oof.

so i don’t act on my feelings and hope that they go away. (spoiler: they don’t.) in january we hung out with a group of friends almost nightly. and rick and i flirt. oh god, do we flirt. but i didn’t even notice— that’s just the way that i interact with people, and he mirrors how people around him behave, so it was just a feedback loop of flirting while one of us was in a relationship! and the worst part is that is girlfriend (i’ll call her anne) was peripherally in the friend group; she hung out with the group sometimes, but not super often.

so obviously, a couple of our more perceptive friends tell us to shut the hell up and stop it. at this point i think, you know what? i’ll just avoid him. this lasted about two days, and then one of our mutual friends (i’ll call him joe) tells me i need to talk to rick. he can’t tell me why but i just need to talk to him.

so i text rick and i set up a time to talk to him, which i’m sure was scary for him, but i say him down and told him that we need to stop, because he’s in a relationship and it’s entirely inappropriate and i’m in love with him and he’s my best friend and i don’t want to lose him. and then he laughs. he told me then that he thought i was gonna yell at him to dump anne, because he had told joe that he wasn’t in love with her and never had been. and he thought joe had told me that so i could knock some sense into him.

so uh… he told me that he was going to break up with anne that night. (which, btw, was 2 days after valentine’s day. ouch.) he also said that that didn’t mean anything for us, but… the next day we hung out one on one all day, and then the next day, and then the whole weekend, aaaaand it was kind of a relationship. we started dating. it moved very fast, because we were already friends and we had already talked about sex in the past.

the thing that really pisses me off, though, is that another mutual friend threatened to tell anne about rick and i, so rick had to tell her at a really inopportune time instead of later. she was fine about the breakup before that, but after that she was clearly pissed, and ignored us both for the rest of the year. if it hadn’t happened that way i really think that we could’ve stayed friends, or at least stayed civil, but the way that it happened is still really upsetting to me. rick and i have been dating for almost six months now, and we’re really perfect for each other and i honestly expect to spend my life with him, but the way that it started was just such a mess and it still haunts me sometimes.

(to be clear: rick never cheated on anne. he’s been cheated on before, and has a bit of trauma in regards to that. cheating is just not a possibility for him.)

so… i know that i’m probably an asshole here, but… idk. should it bother me this much? or was it more justified than i think it was?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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exactlyzealouslady · 1 month

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My old fic that's I wrote on ao3, thought didn't finish it. But maybe I will continue...

♡ ♡ ♡

Cw: general yandere, manipulation, stalking, blackmail, ooc, obsessive/possessive behavior, kidnapping, drugging, Age Gap.

It had been a while since Stelle had visited Belebog. Serval and Natasha missed her so much that they couldn't stop thinking about her. Of course, they won't allow the raccoon girl to get away from them. Together they will find a way to possess their princess heart.

Chapter 1 The Heroe's Last Trip: Serval tries to wait for Stelle patiently, but she gets anxious and worried that the trailblazer might not return. It wasn't until the hero of Belebog came to visit once again. This time Serval will make sure she won't let the raccoon girl escape from her grasp.

P.S. : The story is an au, so the story will not include a Lynx companion quest story. However, it does include spoilers for the Belebog and Xianzhou arcs story.

Serval waits for Stelle for so long. How much has it been since she left Belebog? The mechanic can't count anymore, but she tries to wait as patiently as possible. Yet, Serval feels regret for not stopping a silver girl from traveling so far.

Of course, she realizes that saving people is part of the nameless duty and that she can protect herself. So why does the guitarist feel so bitter that she can't embrace the raccoon girl tightly...

Stelle helped her deal with Cocolia's past. Sure, she still has trauma issues and Gepard is always by her side, but if it was not for the female trailblazer, Serval would not be able to defeat the echo of the former tyrant. Stelle is not just a hero for Jarilo-VI, but for Serval as well.

But one day, Stelle comes to visit Jarilo-IV. Hearing the news, Serval gets so happy that the excitement crows inside her chest to reunite with Stelle. As she sees a raccoon girl walking around the overworld, Serval rushes to her and is about to call her name when a group of crowds surrounds the hero.

They ask Stelle for her autograph, telling her how much she inspires them, and some of them even invite her on a date. Not only that, but a tall black-haired woman in a yellow dress comes to Stelle. The raccoon girl begins flirting with her, as she holds the young lady's left palm and kisses it.

“You must be a pretty princess who came from a far planet. Why don't I take you to the universe with me? I will always be by your side.”

The black-haired woman blushes as a tomato as she stumbles with a response.

“W-well…a-as y-you w-wished m-my h-hero."

“You're the most adorable lady that I ever met~” The black-haired lady was out of line and fainted.

For some reason, Serval feels her heart shrink inside her chest. Seeing people approaching Trailblazer, touching her palm, and blushing from the shower of compliments, makes a mechanic envious. But, she has to be happy for Stelle, right? So why does the blonde feel so negative towards crowds? Why does she want to drug the raccoon girl from them?

As soon as the crowd walks away from Trailblazer, Serval's smile returns. She walks close to Stelle and is about to touch her arm when a tall blue-haired man blocks the former rock star's view from the raccoon girl.

Serval grumbles in frustration. What is he doing here? Did that idiot forget that he is not allowed to be in Overworld? Serval watches how Sampo chats with her darling... Showing the same smug face, laughing, touches her shoulder, and...flirts with her?

Serval's clenches her fist. How dare he? Stelle is uncomfortable and tries to get away from him, but Sampo never leaves her alone. What a creep. But that's okay, Stelle does not have to play the hero role...

🎸🎸🎸

During the night, Serval finds Sampo walking and whistling around the dark area. She comes closer to him and grips his shoulder. The tall, blue-haired man twitches and turns around. Once he sees Serval, he sighs in relief.

“Whew, you scared me. I thought it was your little brother or one of the silver man guards.”

“We need to talk.”

“Listen, I didn't steal anything, I just came to chit-chat with my old friend Stelle."

“And that's what I want to talk about. I want you to stop speaking to her, no, don't even look at her. Stay away, or else you'll regret it, and I will tell my brother that you're here.” Sampo chuckles and lightly pets Serval's left shoulder.

“You have such a great sense of humor. Sometimes I even wonder if you're Gepard's older sis-"

"-If you won't listen to my request, I will BBQ you with my guitar." There is a short pause between the two. Sampo analyses Serval's facial expression and the way she handles her instrument. He gulps before letting his hand go from her shoulder and escapes without saying a word.

🎸🎸🎸

Serval rushes to Gepard who sees her panting heavily. “Serval, has something happened?”

“G-gepard…t-this is an emergency, Sampo is here! I-I j-just s-saw him trying to s-steal one of the relics in the museum."

Gepard clenches his fist. “That brat!” He demands the soldiers to follow him and rushes to catch Sampo. Little, does he notice a sly smile on Serval's face.

Stealing a relic was a ton of hard work. The mechanic has to make sure not to get caught by security and cameras, stay quiet, and most importantly, take an essential item carefully without dropping it. Then, she has to escape from the museum with the same first steps.

Luckily, Sampo didn't leave Overworld. Serval suspects he might have told her a white lie and probably did some shady business… But that is not relevant. She carefully and quietly hands him a relic in his palm when he swings behind and doesn't even notice her. Perfect.

Now, he cannot run away from her brother. Part of the mechanic's mind reminds her how wrong it is to manipulate her little brother to catch Sampo, but at the same time, she feels that one threat wasn't enough as a warning. That is what he gets for trying to steal her precious treasure.

🎸🎸🎸

The next day, Serval sees Stelle walking all over the street. *Now you won't get away from me.* The guitarist says to herself in mind as the smirk appears on her face. The guitarist rushes to the raccoon girl and waves her hand.

“Hey, Stelle, it's been a while since we saw each other!" Stelle gasps and turns her head as her silver hair swings to her side. *Such a pretty girl you are.* Serval hides her face from the blush.

"Oh, hi there Serval. You surprised me, and yeah, it has been so long. Especially since we had a long journey to Xianzhou."

The mechanic smirks at her precious hero. "Let me guess, you got in trouble again?” Serval asks Stelle teasingly. The raccoon girl scratches her neck. “Yeah, we even encouraged and fought against the most dangerous criminals, the 'Stellaron Hunters.'

*Stellaron hunters, huh?* Serval's face hides in the shadow. The guitarist promises herself that she will never let Stelle go. Serval won't allow some filthy criminals to touch what is hers.

“Um, Serval, are you all right?" Stelle's worried voice returns Serval to reality, who gives a trailblazer a quick smile. “Yup, I'm cool. Hey, how about you visit my workshop, and we will continue chit-chat? Does that sound cool?”

“Sure. Besides, I'm so bored."

“Perfect!” Serval grabs her hand and leads her raccoon girl to the workshop.

🎸🦝🎸

Stelle sits on the chair nonchalantly while waiting for a Serval to get a drink. “Well, here is the soda you ordered, my lady.”

Stelle chuckles in response and takes a class from the mechanic. “Thanks, Serval. I finally get to drink something sweet.” Himeko always persuades me to drink coffee, but it is honestly too bitter for me.”

“Haha. When I visited Astral Express, she convinced me to try a bitter coffee and told me that the more bitter, the better. She's a hard-core coffee fan, huh?”

Stelle nods her head and giggles at the joke. *How cute*

Stelle takes a sip and feels a weird taste in her mouth. It still has that sugary texture, but something different… Suddenly, her hand drops a cup, and she almost falls to the ground until Serval catches her.

The mechanic analyses her soon-to-be captive's terrified and red facial expression, as the trailblazer breathes heavily.

*So adorable when you get scared.* That increases Serval's wish to protect Stelle even more.

“S-s-serval… W-what….” But, Stelle cannot finish her line. Serval puts an index finger on her lips while petting the raccoon's girl's head with her left hand. "Shhh… you must be tired of all the adventures. So why won't you rest?” Stelle's eyelids become heavy as she slowly falls asleep.

Serval kisses her right palm, lifts her, and carries her princess style. Her mouth leans closer to the ear and whispers: “Sweet dreams. Now you don't have to fight, my princess. I will be your guard and by your side forever and ever.”

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dark-side-laegrinna · 5 months

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OC Songs (well, not really, but close enough)

@furbyq tagged me (thank you!) and since I don't really have OCs other than my sims that aren't based on characters, she suggested I do it for my Deception IV character playlists! I'll be doing ship songs as well.

Much of my vision of the game's characters are my own, as the plots (there are two, Laegrinna's and Velguirie's stories) are secondary and considered forgettable, which is a shame because I found them as enjoyable as the gameplay. The way I've developed their personalities probably makes no sense to the few other fans and would be considered wildly out-of-character, but tbh I don't give a shit because it brings me joy, and with no fandom, there's no drama. (Hopefully).

Characters:

Ice Queen by Within Temptation: this has always been my favorite song by them but I came to associate it with Laegrinna. She is ruthless and cold for the most part canonically, however I think there's more to her than that and I'll get to that later.

Queen of the Night by Whitney Houston: This is, without a doubt, Velguirie's theme song. "I've got more than enough to make you drop to your knees," "They say I'm trouble and I don't give a damn," the lyrics pretty much speak for themselves. They don't call her the Nightmare Princess for nothing.

Shine On Me by Chris Dane Owens: This sounds like a hero's theme song and Zeno Shin is a self-proclaimed hero and big dumb idiot. Also, if you know me you're likely aware Laegrinna/Zeno is my OTP and it evokes the way I imagine him being awestruck by her. She is the Dark Side Princess but she is his light.

Who's That Girl by Madonna - Okay, so hear me out. Whereas Velguirie is entirely fire and I love her for that, Laegrinna is ice AND fire. You don't see that often because while she uses it to her advantage, she won't admit it. Kind of related to the last song it's about falling under the inescapable spell of a captivating woman. Which again is how I envision her effect on Zeno but may or may not also be something more personal.

Ships:

Latch by Disclosure ft Sam Smith: This has been one of my favorite songs since it came out well before I played Deception IV, but now in my mind it's about how Laegrinna and Zeno are drawn to each other and the metaphors are right on for a game where the main goal is using traps on enemies. (Zeno is a major enemy, by the way. You defeat him, which means yes, Laegrinna canonically kills him. But that's what AUs are for, and I'm a sucker for enemies-to-lovers).

Sleeping Dogs by Merril Bainbridge: A song I've known since high school, holy shit that was 25+ years ago now?? 💀 Another one full of metaphors - Laegrinna and Zeno drive each other crazy, but they DRIVE EACH OTHER CRAZY. Somehow, even though I always thought I hated the tsundere trope, it suits Laegrinna in my head. She doesn't want to be attracted to him but she can't resist him.

Shadows of the Night by Pat Benatar: Although I don't think they meet in canon because Evelyn is from Laegrinna's story and I didn't get very far in quest mode (I watched my husband finish it but that was forever ago) I think Velguirie and Evelyn are perfect for each other. "Surrender all your dreams to me tonight" is the line that hit me, like I said Velguirie is the Nightmare Princess, and I'm not going into detail but let's just say Evelyn is quite keen on surrendering 😂 I haven't thought of any other songs for them yet but I hope to, they're a really fun pairing and I love them.

Okay, I've seen a lot of people tagged or participated already but I'll tag @kaylynn-langerak, @celestialspritz, @h0nkytonkangels, and @esotheria-sims.

#tag game #deception shitposting #well not really a shitpost but there's maybe 1 or 2 other fans on tumblr so I need to put it in a personal tag #laegrinna x zeno #velguirie x evelyn

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linkedin-corp · 2 months

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wait i love ilaw actuslly hes so little guycore. tell us more

EEEEE HIIII . im so glad u asked abt him cuz for the past week or so ive been frothing at the mouth thinking about him and his little gaggle of freaks . tho tbh he is Not really little guy and moreso shadow the hedgehog but in sky:cotl form. its hilarious and i hate him (affectionate)

however unfortunately im one of those people who if i dont know everything there is to know about the lore of a media im super into i just start making stuff up . and sky is one of those occasions . so bare with me

so starting off explaining some sky:cotl lore for those that know absolutely nothing about it . basically . in the lore, wayyy before you (the player) exist , the world of sky was prosperous and full of life and everything was running smoothly like silk butter

but eventually a corrupt fella came around and became a dictator and ruined everything for everyone, dark dragons began to show up and basically strip everyone of their light (which turns them to stone or just straight up kills you)

so (starting to make things up from here on out bcus im not sure if its true to canon or not), when the darkness started to fall, the wasteland elder was at the frontlines of the war that ended up happening, and got sealed away like all the other elders after the war was lost but not killed completely.

ilaw was a high ranking soldier under the wasteland elder and considered them one of his greatest friends (totally not in a gay way) , and it was hard to ever find them apart

ilaw tried to protect his elder (i use the name 'tsadi' for the wasteland elder even though thats confirmed not canon, i still like that its a thing thats in the wiki and its a nice name) tsadi, but ended up failing

tsadi gave light to ilaw so he could continue going on and fighting the war (well. moreso 'run away and save yourself',) but ilaw didint want to leave tsadi behind, and ended up falling right before tsadi did

fast forward to current day (like. hundreds or thousands of years in the future, im unsure how long of time had passed between the shattering and current day in sky), a colleague of ilaw that was revived finds him and offers him light so he isnt trapped anymore

cue ilaw having a massive identity crisis about the fact he fucked up and did not keep himself safe like tsadi wanted OR keep tsadi safe , and failed his duties to keep his people safe in general

so he ends up spending mostly ALL of his time in wasteland, brooding over the fact that pretty much everything is different now and everyone he used to know is either dead or missing

bcuz of this though , he ends up meeting a moth (what people call "new players") there, after saving them from a krill (dark dragon). this of course causes said moth to become attached at his heel and they never leave after that. accidental moth adoption

it helps him heal somewhat, because for awhile he was very closed off and secluded and would only really talk to his colleague, or others that he considered close friends (which. at the time after his revival, wasnt very many)

eventually, said moth heads back to wasteland after building up the courage and makes it through. though, when she returns, they tell ilaw that they saw tsadi there in the temple. it does make him go into shock for awhile and for a bit after that he doesnt head back into the wastelands due to immense terror. 💔 aand the healing process restarts

so. lots of war trauma and gay longing and tragedy . ive cried over these idiots a few times and i love them to death .

but i do have a couple more small facts about ilaw ! or other thoughts i had written down ect ..

he finds the skykids of current day a tad bit annoying right after he gets revived but eventually softens because the hustle and bustle is comforting . something something lots of background noise so he doesnt have to think about his own problems

i also often imagine him easily beating the shit out of the krill in wasteland . but he wouldnt attempt that in current day because i doubt he trusts himself not to get fucked up again plus hes too busy thinking about tsadi

just. sits utop the crumbled forts and grumbles to himself while imagining himself beating up krill . hes literally shadow the hedgehog but in sky form . if he knew what kinning was he would kin that guy

#hes such an assholeeeeee i love him❤️❤️❤️❤️#my friends who r into sky know how crazy i am abt them im nuts #ilaw and tsadi are so dumb i love them . i imagine tsadi can be very serious but is lighthearted in his heart #enjoys being around ilaw because he's basically a personal heater + a good sparring mate #tsadi is very oblivious (most of the time) to ilaw's crush on him . which makes alll of this tragedy even better #ilaw when he gets to be gay AND a dad. hoooooly shit #sorry im nuts. im nutso #im craaaazyyyy ughrj #long post btw . im so sorry lmao #long post #really long post #sky:cotl #letter deliveries #link's lectures #gay bird (ilaw)

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plaquerat · 2 months

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i can't help but feel like ive been ruined. i spent so many nights begging someone i was in love with to not kill themself, to not abandon me, to please please love me back. i was forced to swallow my religious trauma because any way i processed it was Wrong and if i prayed more, if i shut up about saints, if i believed harder that god was truly good i could help the person i was obsessed with. i stopped watching or reading things i liked because one time the person made a joke making fun of a piece of media that's known to be bad and if you do that that's the same as endorsing what that piece of media is about and that would take this person away from me.

i helped make a server with someone after we left a larger one. we brought people we knew in. i invited a few people from a dead one i was in for the same piece of media. it would be nice, i thought, if we could all hang out and post art and have fun in a smaller, safer space. i liked a character that was very unpopular in the fanbase. the movie for this piece of media came out recently. there was a really awful joke made about this character in it. it made me feel gross and it felt like something that character wouldn't say or do. it was a gag comedy piece, and i've been into comic books before. i was used to being able to go "hm, that's uncool. i don't like how the character was written in this, and i don't think it's really indicative or how the character is." this apparently isn't normal and i, a csa victim who was just barely piecing together my abuse, was made to feel like i was evil and a supporter of the very thing i was so hurt by. tone indicators blew up around the time this server was active. i had a very hard time with them, and i have a history of being talked down to and infantilized. i asked people not to use them with me, and explicitly said why. i got off work that night and got a dm from someone i considered a friend at the time telling me how shitty and ableist i am for feeling that way. that if i feel like im being infantilized, then it means i think anyone who needs them is a fucking idiot. i never said that at all. when i got upset over how i was being talked to i got told that see? this is why someone like YOU needs them? because im actually stupid and need to have my hand held and told how stupid i am. anything i did from this point was obviously malicious. if i liked anything i was stupid. if i posted that character i was still so attached to i was into pedophilia. that person i was so obsessed with was in here for a while and after they cut me off completely i wanted to wipe the server. it was pretty dead anyway. i wanted it done quietly. one of my supposed friends was besties with that person in here who loved to accuse me of horrible things. they told them and they drove me out because if i deleted a server they posted in once a month that was bad and wrong and who cares about anything involving me. so i left.

i was invited into a server by someone i was mutuals with. it was nice. people in there were friendly and some were actually excited to see me. the owner was someone who very much did have issues, but we all did. occasionally id say things without thinking and get nipped. oh my bad haha! ill try harder. and i did. there were five vent channels and one was angry and involving things that upset us morally. i got really ovsessed with looking at accounts that posted things, triggering myself over and over. this was normal and good, the server owner believed. this person accused people of pedophilia on a fandom poll for voting on a character they liked and not this person's personal choice. my one irl friend's mom died when i was at work. on my break, i posted about it in shock, asking for support. when i got off work, i was being accused of making the server owner attempt suicide. when i floated the idea of commissions before moving, the server owner accused me of stealing customers from them. they had closed theirs earlier that day, after all. i couldnt post about anything if they had mentioned it to me. that was theft and i needed to credit them for everything. when i got into ghost, i said i liked how people would sexualize the papas. it was good, i thought, that older characters were being seen as attractive. the sevrer owner accused me of incest then, because my character i had made for ghost was related to these characters. i felt weird and gross talking about it with them around after that. i was told that at one point when i offhandedly mentiomed having a crush on someone, the server owner was convinced i meant them. in the end, the server owner cut the entire group off, and it turned out he was abusive to a lot of us. but people mentioned i seemed to get a very large chunk of it.

in tthe leadup to the ghost movie, i was so, so scared. i didn't know why. some horrible, evil part of my brain was telling me it was going to turn out copia was a pedophile. that was insane. that wouldn't happen, that's disgusting and evil and completely against what ghost is. but it had happened before with a character i liked. and what was one more comfort stolen away from me, an ontologically evil person. it didn't happen. obviously, it didn't and i was relieved. i still feel insane for even thinking it.

im trying to do better these days. i dont go out of my way to look at things that will trigger me if i can help it. im supposed to get into therapy more regularly now that ive moved again. most people i talk to now are supportive of me, understand that im kind of a freak and someone who has some very abnormal beliefs— and that its okay for me to have them. im not hurting people by worshipping lucifer. im not bad and wrong for being interested in saints and rituals. i know people that have had fears like mine because of similar events. im writing more than i used to, im talking about weirder ideas more. there is still fear, and there will be until i can have a decent way to work on it.

i really feel like a lot of this didn't need to happen in the first place, though. most things probably dont need to happen. they just do and im a very fundamentally messed up person for it now. oh well i guess. eventually ill stop crying before sleeping and immediately upon waking up.

#gnashing of teeth #emesis event

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thestobingirlie · 1 year

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Hello!! Just wanted to say thank you for your absolutely refreshing takes. It makes me feel like I'm not the only one which is so nice. I love checking your blog and reading through your responses, they're always so insightful!! Especially about Steve, Robin and Nancy

One thing ive been thinking about lately that ive been wondering if you have thoughts on (but no pressure if you dont!) - is Nancy's plan to take down Vecna in s4. She saw the vision , she's ambitious and determined to take Vecna down, but she's also unempathetic, doesn't think about consequences and always needs to be right. She bulldozes over everyone and a part of me wonders how differently it could have gone if they didn't follow her plan. Or adjusted it. I mean, Steve has severe road rash up his whole back and arms, has been bitten, strangled, and is breathing in the toxic Upside Down air - and she still wants to go back into the Upside down relying on him. She dismisses his concerns about the bats and then the bats kill Eddie. A lot of this is probably just the Duffers writing decisions but get this boy some medical attention please oh my god take his injuries seriously. Nancy gets herself another gun even though they don't work on Upside Down creatures.

Sorry this isn't more coherent! Nancy is just so complicated and fucked up and interesting to think about!

thank you so much! i love compliments <3

thanks for calling my responses insightful! i try not to get too lost in what i want for characters and my interpretations and stick to what canon presents us with. obviously my opinions will always seep through, but i’m glad you like them!

i think the thing with nancy’s plan is that the duffers don’t want to make nancy look like an idiot, but her plan was designed to fail.

so everything that goes wrong is kind of outside of her control. there’s an earthquake, and they get caught by vines. eddie chooses to run back into the horde of bats. jason shows up and breaks max’s walkman.

the duffers didn’t want the audience to look at the plan and blame nancy for how it went wrong, because she’s their girlboss.

the thing is, when you look deeper into the plan, it’s just kinda stupid. she has someone majorly injured on the main vecna hunting team (and god someone please help this boy, he’s bled through his bandages nearly the second they’re on), she’s using a gun against an upside down creature when she’s never seen that work (steve has an axe that he just doesn’t use against vecna?), eddie and dustin aren’t given any kind of firepower to defend themselves, and everyone completely forgot that jason was after them.

i think if we’re going within the realm of canon, no plan they came up with was ever going to work because the vecna defeat has to wait for s5.

but within fanon, i do think if they’d waited a little more, if nancy had been a little more willing to listen to the others, planned a little better, this much shit wouldn’t have gone wrong. nancy finds it difficult to consider other people, she can’t always see the big picture when she’s focused on saving people, she’s not super emotionally in tune with others, and as a result the boy that’s seen two people get horrifically killed in the last few days gets put on the suicide mission.

though we also have to remember nancy is traumatised by what vecna showed her, so i don’t know if she ever would’ve been able to think clearly. she’s feeling guilty, and desperate, and so she reasons out max putting herself in danger as for the greater good.

sorry this didn’t end up being more about nancy! nancy is very fun to dive into, and her role in the plan is super interesting, especially because i don’t think she’s a particularly good leader figure, but i think the plan sucked because the duffers needed it to suck. and if the duffers wanted vecna defeated in s4, her plan would’ve worked, and nancy wouldn’t have girlbossed her way too close to the sun.

#nancy wheeler #steve harrington #eddie munson #max mayfield #stranger things #asks #anon

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thatfangirlofsb · 1 year

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A/N: I'm back again with the fourth part, I hope you like it.

T/W: Spoilers from the grishaverse (series). Smut.

Your highness (IV)

"Are you ready?"

Zoya's hands stroked Alina's hair one last time. A week and a day had passed since that meeting, and the wedding was going to start at any moment. That was a big political move, and everything had to go perfectly; no matter the cost.

"Zoya..."

"Don't ask me about weddings, because I don't know anything."

Alina sighed, but Zoya could see a small evil smile through the mirror.

"Sure? I think you know a lot, especially about making endless wedding nights."

She, unintentionally, grabbed a tangle of hair between her fingers and pulled, causing a small cry from the sun summoner. How did she know that? Her mind quickly flashed back to the first time they had sex, and how she ran away in shame after waking up and… she bumped into her. Damn tailor.

"Gen..."

"Genya." The bride ended up getting up from her seat and touching the area where she pulled. "She says that one day you ran into her. You looked nervous, and shortly after Nikolai came out of his room with only pants and a robe, shouting your name."

"Yes, it was our first time together." What was the point of hiding it if she already knew? It was silly, so she grabbed the mascara and started applying it to the contrary while she kept talking. "I got too close when I put the handcuffs on him and…it happened. The next day I woke up next to him, naked like two newborn babies, and I tried to get out without him knowing. When I was about to… he woke up. And the rest will already have been told to you by Genya."

"Let me tell something, you have the skin of a baby's bottom." Zoya couldn't help but smile when she heard it, and laughed when Alina touched the skin of her hand with her index finger as if she were checking if a dough was done. "Soft and smooth."

"He has the butt of a baby."

"Have you looked at his butt?" Alina separated from her very surprised, half leaving her eyelashes done, and turned her chair so that she could sit facing the squaller.

"And are you pregnant?" Zoya said with her typical tone of sarcasm, rolling her eyes at the sun summoner's question. "Of course I've looked at it, we've fucked like animals. Although it's been the least thing I've noticed." She stood in front of the dresser, crouching down a bit so she could see herself in the mirror as she applied the mascara to herself. "The ego is not the only big thing he has."

"Zoya Nazyalensky, you finally kept your promise." She looked at her confused, so Alina decided to explain it with the best impersonation of the squaller voice she could do. " 'Toss him over. Break his heart cruelly.' "

" 'I will gladly give our poor prince comfort,' " Zoya continued, trying to copy the very poor imitation of her voice that the opposite did. " 'and I would make a magnificent queen.' "

"You can still be."

"Be what? His consolation prize?"

Alina couldn't help but notice the slight feeling of pain that brushed Zoya's words, so she decided to try to work it out.

"No, his queen."

"He confessed to me that he liked you before." Zoya lifted her chin, trying to contain the sadness that wanted to escape. "I'm not going to be the consolation prize anymore, Alina. And it's just sex, we both know it." She returned to face the half-Shu girl and began, again, to apply the mascara gently. "Thought sometimes he gets stupid."

"Stupid?"

"Yeah." She stretched the opponent's eyelids a little with her thumb and index finger, trying to be more precise. "After the first time...we did it again." And not just that time, Zoya thought, remembering all the times they'd ended up naked and in each other's arms. "When we were done I got up, but he grabbed my wrist and sat me back on the bed. Without saying anything he wrapped his arm around me and pulled my head against his chest. His heart was beating so fast, and I was such an idiot that I stayed there until we fell asleep."

Zoya made a mistake and left some ink on the shu's skin, so she quickly went to get a wet cloth and began to clean the mistake. She was losing her technique, or she hoped so that the real reason wasn't that blond and the situation.

"Do you like him?." Alina's smile let all her teeths show, and Zoya looked away, crossing her arms.

"Him? No, never."

"Then why are you blushing?"

"I'm not..." Was what the sun summoner said true? With some fear she touched her cheeks, soon discovering that it was a joke from the future queen of Ravka. "Alina!"

Zoya watched as she smiled even harder, making it seem like she enjoyed joking with her about the boy who would become her husband in a few hours.

"Something is wrong with you."

I can't take it anymore, that's what happens to me. The blue-eyed's hands left the mascara on a table, and she pulled up a chair to sit across from Alina. It was all done, so telling her wouldn't make her rethink the options.

"I'm pregnant." Starkov's smile disappeared faster than it had appeared. Anything was expected, anything but that. She wondered how she should act towards that confession, but Zoya helped her, leaving her no time to answer. "And it's clearly his because I haven't tried another guy... since a lot. I don't know how it happened, we were always careful and..."

"He knows?" She couldn't see how the one that had gone from her enemy to a friend was breaking, how the tough general was about to cry in front of her. Her past self would never have expected that girl who joked about Mal and then got punched would be next to her, confessing the secret that must be breaking her inside and she, Alina Starkov, wasn't enjoying seeing her suffer. "For saints's sakes Zoya, do you still envy me that you even got pregnant at the same time as me."

A rarely seen laugh left the general's lips, at least she wasn't going to let out a gust of air for that comment. She didn't want to have some broken ribs like the first time.

"Doesn't." Alina was going to speak, but Zoya cut her off with her tense gaze. "And he'll never know."

"Let me tell you that's impossible, your body will change and you'll look like me after this stupid wedding banquet." The squaller didn't laugh, and it only took a few seconds of silence to realize the reality. "You'll...?"

"Yes."

"But he's the father, don't you think he has some right to know?" She rolled her eyes in a playful way, trying to cross her legs with that stupid dress. "And he's not the type to leave you hanging, all the…"

"All the opposite." She finished the sun summoner's sentence with a sigh. "Ravka needs him, Ravka needs you. And if I told him this…" She hesitated to touch her belly. She had never dared, she was afraid of becoming attached to what was growing inside her and that all of Ravka would succumb to that selfishness. "You know he would do everything but not good for his country if he discovers it."

"I'm sure you'll find a middle ground." A smile, but this time softer than before, appeared on Alina's face. She couldn't see Zoya like this, with her armour still on while she was destroying herself without control inside. "I'm going to support you in everything, you know that right?"

"I know." She got up from her seat, turning around and walking towards the door with a hurried step. "I was already called 'the Darkling's whore', the last thing I need now is to be the king's."

She opened the door and stepped out, quickly shutting it behind her. She couldn't break down at that moment, no. Her hand brushed her belly over the fabric of her dress, damned king.

[°°°]

"Nikolai..."

His name came out in small whispers from her lips, causing the blond to kiss her with more force and passion. None of that was planned. Her intention was to go to his room to talk to him, and then put an end to that strange relationship they had. But it wasn't like that. As soon as she stepped over the threshold, the blond lunged at her causing her to lean her back against the recently closed door. At first she thought of pushing him away, but her body and mind didn't.

"Zoya..."

At first it was slow and gentle, as if that wasn't just a small moment of release for him, but as soon as the voice of the grisha, between moans and gasps, told him to fuck her… he changed completely.

Zoya didn't want more hugs, affectionate words or sleeping together as a couple in love. She wanted to punish herself more, to make her mind realize finally that Zoya Nazyalensky didn't deserve love or happiness. And if because of that her back would brake from the rebound effect caused by his thrusts... she would gladly accept it.

They were no longer those two young lovers thar carefully undressed and tasted every part of the opposite body. Now they were something forbidden, feeling danger and fear in her dress pulled up and his pants pulled down to the knees. Now they had become what so many rumors had said about them, and they didn't care; at least Zoya.

"Further..." The squaller no longer cared that the movements against the door were visible from outside. This would be the last time, and she was going to make the most of it. The grisha would leave for a week, with the excuse of taking a break from the exhausting preparations for the wedding, and would return to her position, if Alina didn't want to claim it back, without the last memory of what he and she had.

"Zoya..."

Her name left his lips again, but this time along with the stop of his movements. The door no longer sounded like it was being pounched continuously. But his eyes kept moving, watching the face of the grisha.

"Nikolai Lantsov, if you don't keep going I swear I'll find a wedding guest and finish what you started."

What did she want to try to do with that sentence? Make him jealous? I'm so dumb. Clearly he wasn't going to feel that, they were nothing. Only lovers, and the lovers aren't jealous when the other is about to get married. Okay, she did, Zoya Nazyalensky had a bit of jealousy. But she knew it was a nonsense, they were nothing and that marriage wasn't for love. But still, in a moment of weakness, she imagined him by her side and not with Alina. Little did she know that Nikolai felt that way too.

He didn't answer to her threat, he just looked at her with his sideways smile and carefully tucked part of her locks of hair behind her ear. Little did she know how tempted he was to say the forbidden words: I love you. But Ravka was always the first choice between the two of them, and with those words it would be second. If they were other people, if they were in another situation...

They had both wished that was enough; that unbridled sex was capable of making something impossible disappear: their feelings. But they didn't succeed, and the disappearance was also unreachable. Even the king himself didn't dare change the word to improbable when he thought about how he felt about Zoya. His inside struggled between two options; moving against her again until he felt her tighten around him or confessing everything to the squaller. Surely the grisha had already gotten used to confessions, and although he seemed not to give them importance... he did. That night, in the bathtub, he used those salts because he knew where they were coming from: another nobleman trying to get Zoya's attention. For a moment, he felt that strange feeling of jealousy, but thanks to the blue-eyed one he was relieved when she began to moan his name while that water spilled. He was with her there, not that nobleman.

The Lantsov emerald was heavier than normal in his pocket. Why? Did he feel like he was doing something wrong against Alina? Would he dare to put it back on her finger during the ceremony? It was a marriage of convenience, but the previous Nikolai wanted it because of his feelings. And it would have stayed that way if he hadn't seen her, Zoya Nazyalensky, in front of the Darkling's funeral pyre. It wasn't a good time to feel his heart beating so hard, but his feelings didn't seem to matter about that the body of one of Ravka's greatest enemies was burning in front of him. He felt, again, the bump that Tolya gave him while walking. He hadn't felt anything for being engrossed with the blue-eyed girl, and now remembering it either.

In Alina's room, before the coronation, he had seen her again. What had she thought of him? His eyes were clearly fixed on her, and he hoped Zoya's were on him as well. But then came the coronation, and his hand couldn't reach her's as the two, in great pain, fell to the ground. In the end everyone was good thanks to Alina, the savior, but there was a damage that from that day on was going to be incurable; not being able to run to her side to check on her, no matter how people started talking about them after that.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered, leaving a soft kiss on the forehead of the opposite one who, with great astonishment, enjoyed it more than she should. "Please go." He couldn't use her that way, he couldn't. While in the mind of the opposite it was just sex, even she told that to him, the king's imagination turned everything into romantic moments where, although they gave free rein to their passions, they were two lovers completely crazy for each other.

"What?" It sounded more like a gasp than a question; Nikolai had get out of her too quickly. But then she simply decided to nod, adjusting her dress while he did the same to his clothes. She turned and opened the door, where minutes before, the king's movements caused some hits against it, and she sighed before keep talking. "Nikolai Lantsov, this ends here."

She didn't give him a chance to answer, she just left as fast as she came in. And he, still stunned by what he had done, fell on one of the chairs that were there.

Had it been for the best?

—————

You can read first part HERE.

You can read second part HERE.

You can read third part HERE.

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1-800-c0sm1c · 2 years

Text

꒰bad dracula !꒱

sumire is breaking the bias of vampires, one attractive fluffy haired boy at a time.

character x character ship

includes sumire & joker !

warnings : slight spoilers for p5r (kasumi // sumire) , might be a lil ooc (?)

word count : 1917

a/n : happy halloween ! ive been really busy this week so this is a bit rushed but i really wanted to get something out for spooky season !! definitely not my best work as i havent written char x char in a hot minute but i hope you still enjoy

the month of october is supposed to be the most important to those like sumire. but truthfully, shed rather it just didnt exist entirely. the holiday season was hardly a celebration, and the young vampire found herself leaving the castle much more often than usual.

it started out as just a distraction, albeit a bad one. staring longingly at the civilians below her, living her ideal life always filled with a sense of envy. it was unfair. why was she unable to be normal?

she had begun to memorize the silhouettes of the people who would unsuspectingly walk past the mountain her family estate looked out from. however, one boy in particular would always catch her eye. shed only caught a few glances of his face, but that was more than enough to prove that she wanted to get closer to him, and not just his backside.

maybe october wasnt all bad, at the very least sumire was able to blend in with those around her, just as long as her mouth was covered. but not being able to talk would make her seem rude, wouldnt it? that meant approaching the handsome stranger was out of the question, especially because every solution she could come up with was a dead end. this hadnt been the first time shed try to forcibly remove her sharp fangs, and she felt like a bit of an idiot for even attempting again.

one night while walking through town, she came face to face with the stranger, literally. without looking where she was going, she bumped into his taller frame, being launched backwards onto the ground. you know, when she was pondering whether or not she should come talk to him tonight, this wasnt what she had in mind. “oh, my bad! are you okay?” sumire is brought back to reality and realizes that woah, he is very close to her face and is criminally attractive. she almost entirely forgets the one rule she had set for herself, not to speak to anyone, and grabs his extended hand with the most awkward head nod possible.

“make sure you watch where youre going from now on, some people arent as nice when you bump into them.” he laughs, and there must be literal hearts in the young vampires eyes right now. she covers her mouth, muttering a small “youre right, ill be more careful.” before hes slowly getting closer again. “are you sure youre alright? is your mouth bleeding?” at this point, sumires nerves are on fire, and if this continues hes going to mistake the blush on her face for her running a fever.

“uhm, yeah im totally fine!” the handsome stranger doesnt seem convinced. “i dont think ive ever seen you around before, but then again im not really from here. im ren by the way, a second year.” sumire is about ready to hit herself over how easy it was to actually get to start a conversation with him, but the fact that she cant be normal is enough of a reason for her to lock herself in the castle for another 100 years.

“im uhm… sumire. sumire yoshizawa.” he laughed again, something sumires not sure her heart will ever get used to. “yeah, i know. this is yours by the way.” he holds out the id that fell out of her pocket when they bumped into each other. he looks at it once more before handing it to her. “didnt realize you were older than me, my apologies.” shes correcting him before she even realizes what shes doing. “oh! uhm, its actually a fake. im only a first year.” yeah, that sounded believable enough right? what difference is there really between being 15 and 1500? “is that so? well you surely fooled me, i guess it works.” she scoffs. “oh please, i clearly look way younger than you!”

sumires guard is down, and ren manages a glimpse at what she was so desperately trying to hide in her mouth. “hey thats pretty cool! getting your halloween costume ready?” her heart sinks, but only slightly. how could she be so stupid? of course people wont question it during the holiday season. “well now that you mention it, yeah! pretty realistic right?” “definitely! hey, if youre free, you should come to my friends halloween party!” a party? nobodys ever invited sumire to one of those before. she hasnt even had someone to call a friend before. she cant help herself but excitedly say yes.

they quickly exchange numbers, ren sending both the address and time, before they go their separate ways. those around sumire dont miss her overwhelming excitement for the next week and a half.

its the day before rens friend, ryujis party. hes asked to meet with her before the party so they can arrive together, and sumires heart is on fire. they meet on the hill in front of her familys castle, and calling ren intimidated was an understatement.

it was a silly idea really, he knew hed never be able to top how realistic sumires costume was, but he thought itd be fun to try anyways. he was not expecting sumire to appear in an extravagant dress, (hopefully) fake blood, and those same perfect fangs. “you really went all out, huh?” she nods. “oh, but dont worry, the red thing is just ketchup!” he smiles. “yeah i figured. whyd you choose a vampire?”

sumire was afraid hed ask that question. especially since she didnt have a believable enough answer. “...well, my mom calls me a bad dracula. she tells me to be scarier, but im a bit different!” “i think its clever to take a popular costume and make it different!” oh cool, hes clueless. that surely isnt going to get her anywhere.

the walk to ryujis is horribly awkward, for reasons sumire cant quite put her finger on. shes searching for anything to talk about that hopefully wont scare ren away. “you know, ive never been to party before, but i just wanna have fun dancing! especially under the moon like this.” “well dont be scared, some of my friends are a bit much, but i promise that theyre nice people. and im sure youll crush it on the dance floor, youre already dancing in my heart, after all.” there he goes again with that dreamy smile, the one sumire struggles to find the right words around.

her face reddens, and she finds herself hiding herself in his chest. if she werent undead, sumire swears that ren would be the death of her. he wraps his arms around her, along with his long black coat. “you know, its not necessarily easy to walk with you on me like this, not that im complaining or anything.”

in typical ryuji fashion, his party is a tad bit boring, and further proves you cant leave him in charge of anything. after about two hours straight of dancing, ren had decided to ditch the party, in favor of watching the moon. sumire found him on top of the same hill he had met up with her at. “it looks a little bit like youre stalking me.” “thats bold coming from you, since this is basically right in front of my house.” “i guess you got me there. what do your parents do to be able to afford a creepy place like this, anyways?” “well ive already told you dummy. were vampires.” ren laughs. “its almost as amusing as it was the first time. no, but seriously, are they like, in the mafia or something?” sumire shakes her head. “dont you think even if they were i probably wouldnt tell you?”

ren rolls his eyes light heartedly. “fine then, keep your secrets.” she goes to sit down next to ren on the grass.“its not my fault if you dont believe me. i really shouldnt have even been down in the city that one night we bumped into each other anyways.” sumire shrugs. “and why is that? were you grounded or something up in the big spooky tower?” “i mean sort of. my dad always tells me to be colder to humans, but then ill get a stomachache.” she lays her head on rens shoulder.

“.... if youre really a vampire, why havent you bitten me yet?” sumire sighs. “how many times do i have to tell you? im a bad dracula for a reason! i wont ever hurt you, im a vegetarian after all.” her breath on his neck should have been the warning to run, but he found himself believing her words. “its just a little hard to believe, you know? does that mean other supernatural beings exist?” ren got over his doubts and fears surprising quick, and sumire couldnt help but smile at the way his face lit up.

“i can neither confirm nor deny that. but see? isnt it so much better when you ignore the backend talk thats reflected by the moon?” she pouts. “everybody always paints us out to be so bad. i mean sure, some of us are, but then it makes it just that much harder for vampires like me. like, why do i have to wait until cold october nights every year just to go out? fake id and everything?” ren grabs her hand. “well i guess ive just never really thought about it before. especially since i didnt even know you were being for real until about 2 minutes ago.”

“you can feel my fangs if you want to, for you know, more proof.” she blushes at her own words. did she really just say that? ren nods. sumire moves from laying her head on his shoulder to sitting on rens lap, facing him. his touch is gentle, not like hes afraid of her, but more so that he worries any more pressure and shell break like glass. nobodys ever treated sumire like that before, like she was something that needed to be protected.

his hand rests on her cheek, thumb on her bottom lip. she slowly opens her mouth, attempting to put her fangs on full display. “be careful, theyre sharp.” she mutters. ren mouths an “okay”, before he places his thumb on one of the teeth. he strokes his thumb over it with stars practically in his eyes. “so cool!” he whispers, like anything louder would ruin the moment. sumires face reddens. ren rests his hand on her thigh.

“so.. hypothetically speaking, if you were to bite someone, does the blood go through the fangs like a straw and straight into your body? or do you still have to like… suck it yourself?” sumire blinks slowly. “that sure is… a first. no, theyre not straws…” ren snaps his fingers, a confident smirk on his face. “damn, looks like futaba owes me 20 dollars.” “did you seriously make a bet on that?” she giggles. “well duh, it was the only logical way to solve it.” sumire glares at him playfully. “okay, okay! my bad, dont bite me!”

she gasps, “i would never!” he pats her head. “i know, i know. im just messing with you.” sumire lets out a “hmph!” sound, turning her head away. “oh come on, dont be like that, im sorry.” he gently kisses her cheek, and as soon as its happened its over. ren cant help but smile at how quickly she whips her head back around, face bright red. he was about to apologize until sumire places a soft kiss on his lips.

“there… now were even.”

grrr why are endings so hard :sob: anyways fic is inspired by bad dracula by red velvet teehee im so tired ^^;;

#✧;;↬ my work.❞┊🍓#persona #persona 5 #shin megami tensai persona #sumire yoshizawa #ren amamiya #sumire x ren #violet persona 5 #joker persona 5 #persona 5 royal #violet x joker #kasumi yoshizawa #kasumi x ren

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calypso-finale · 1 year

Text

Eighty Two.

Aziel hid behind my legs as Ti and Taylan walked into my house “wow” Taylan just said, I mean he hasn’t seen my house so it’s the first time “is that a good wow?” I said, he is staring all around “this is amazing, wow” he is in shock, hugging Ti “welcome back!” I spat as she laughed “I know right, it’s a quick trip and I was like I need to see my sister of course, and also mother and her demands, well not a demand. I am just helping her” moving back from the hug “with a meeting?” she nodded her head “yeah, her and dad have gone to Mexico to have some time away, just them two and she asked and I couldn’t say no and I said to Taylan wait till you see Rylee home, you going to faint and look at him” looking over at him, his hands on his hips flabbergasted “wow, I mean I get why you want to stay here because I mean just look at it, it’s amazing” I grinned at him “thank you” I said taking it as a compliment “you’re welcome because this is crazy” Ti is trying to get at Aziel but he doesn’t want to go to her “what happened Aziel” pushing the door closed but he is just running around me “Jesus” I said, these two just trying to go around me “hey!” I spat and grabbed him, picking him up “why are you not going to auntie, what is wrong?” he poked his lips out “daddy” he whined out “yeah he went to sleep, you saw it. I showed you it, now auntie is here, and he wants to play. You want to play ball” he nodded his head “you can play ball with a boy? Look” I pointed at Taylan “yeah” he just said “well you need to give auntie a hug first, you can’t just have a tantrum and cry about things and then act like I will accept it” Tianna took him from me “I thought you was TT baby? What is this? You know what is happening, you are growing up now and you don’t want to know” he is hugging her through gritted teeth, he does not want to do it. He wants to speak to Oakley really, but he fell asleep while on facetime, what does he want me to do “let’s show Taylan your toys” Tianna walked off with him, it’s nice to have guests here because it can get lonely.

Taylan and Aziel can kick the ball, Ti and I are just stood in the corner because Aziel kept following us back so we are here, and he will stay “I am glad you came by the way; I needed a sitter. Grace the lady I use, she has gone home, death in her family not upset about it and she will be back, but I was going to get Diji, well he was going to come but you’re here now” Tianna eyeballed me “oh dad won’t like us staying over, he said that if you come here you visit you don’t stay over with your boyfriend, he refuses any partner in houses, like ok but I have dropped my cases off at the hotel but sure. You have a date? Potential now” I chuckled “my potential is currently asleep and acting like I won’t come for him” Ti pulled a face “Oakley?” she said “yeah, well he doesn’t go out and we won’t. It’s been weeks and I kept saying I want to watch that new Rom Com and they have these cinema pods just private, he doesn’t do anything so I was like you can just be there with me” Ti laughed “knowing him he is going to be laid out thinking she isn’t coming but you are” nodding my head “Exactly that, idiot” I huffed out “how is he?” she asked “oh I saw that video of you and him, you shouting fuck off so many times, it was funny but also it wasn’t nice for him either, and then people kept saying it’s a Cancer hospital why is he there and the judgemental things and then dad commented, Oakley not ready to say?” shaking my head “he is not ready to even accept it himself still, he struggles a lot. But he is well, I see him more now. I put lotion on his body, I do it and he doesn’t mind it, Aziel sees him more when I go to the place” Ti cringed “is it scary to see?” she mumbled “oh it’s draining, he has a catch up with his doctor and that will determine if he needs more chemo or maybe IV line, I hope it’s IV because he is worse with chemo but then we find out if it’s spread so I am scared for him, but seeing him, putting lotion on him and feeling just no muscle, it’s not nice but I love him” I shrugged “he deserves some happiness, I pray it’s going so he can start having peace” smiling at her lightly.

Turning to Ti “are you ok to have him though?” I asked her “I am back tomorrow, maybe lunchtime” she gasped “You’re staying over there?” nodding my head “yeah, nothing like sinister just you know. I am trying that is all” she nodded her head “I will get Taylan to go back to the hotel, but I will stay over because dad will catch wind of it and won’t like it” she rolled her eyes “why is Taylan here? He has games” Ti rolled her eyes “he is currently on leave because he erm” she shuffled to me “they went on a team night out, which is fine, but he can’t really drink. He claims that he was spiked but the boys said no they didn’t, and he got a little heated and things happen, so him and the player are both on leave until they do the investigation you know” letting out an oh “mhmmm he isn’t good with drinking, kind of same with me and weed, I turn into a different person too. So that is why he isn’t playing and following you, makes sense” Ti chuckled “are you going to do the Savage Fenty runway with mom and us girls? The New York one” looking at Ti “mom hasn’t said” she gasped “oh please act shocked, maybe she just told so, she wants us daughters to be with her and do the event, I think mother is stopping shows and starting to do these instead, but she wants us to kick start it. I think she wants us to still be involved in Fenty” letting out an oh “I wasn’t aware sorry, but did you say yeah?” she nodded her head “I mean sure, I will do it. I mean anything to get my name out there, but I will have to tell Fendi, I am literally a Fendi girl. I have to tell them anything, they said I am the face of it” Ti cooed out “no, that magazine they did, the cover and the pages of you as a child and now, and the same clothing. I have a copy, it was that perfect, I loved it” I cooed out “I got emotional seeing that, I was like look at me then and now, ugh. Who would have thought I would be at this stage now” rolling my eyes “what is wrong with you now? You have a mansion, a son, a contract? Nothing bad” she is right “how is the housing thing going?” she eyeballed me “drowning” she laughed “he is helping me currently but it’s hard fucking work” I cringed, I can imagine it is hard work all that.

Waiting out the door for Wadz to answer, when I left Ti said me and dick appointments but I am not mentioning anything like his sex drive is non-existent right now, that is private and I just laughed it off really “I mean who else is going to come” Wadz opened the door for me to come in “you look banging” he said, looking behind me “well the clothing line is comfy, thank you for the hoodie” I said to him “you better take pictures and tag us in it” I chuckled “I will do” opening the door to his room “nothing done?” he is sat on the edge of the bed “for what?” he looked at me “please don’t play dumb” he pointed at the duffle bag “you did that?” I said to him “no Wadz, I just woke up” I can tell he has “well go and pee, I will set out clothing and we can go” he nodded his head, he isn’t saying no “we argued so that is why he wants to run” Wadz said behind me “oh dear, not that again” Oakley smiled “I like the hoodie” he pointed “I look banging?” he grinned “well thank you to Wadz for giving it me, it’s comfy. You can wear yours, come” waving him to get up “put it away” rolling my eyes, him in his boxers “yeah, my bad” stepping to the side “so you staying there all night?” nodding my head “yeah, be back about lunch time. It’s more for me and he is my entertainment to listen to me rant” Wadz looks happy “get him out, but good. Have fun with him” I smirked “oh I will” Oakley just grumbled something before walking into the bathroom.

Peaking into the room and I just groaned out as I held the door open for him, he is taking his sweet time “is there something you don’t like in there?” the lady asked me as she is here “me and him aren’t together and the roses” she let out an oh “we are friends currently” she just smiled “sorry, it’s a couple room so we assumed, well it was put in the detailing really” I just laughed “it’s fine, honestly. Thank you” she smiled “I will leave you to it” of course she is saying that “take your time” I said to Oakley, he walked inside “is this a honeymoon” the driver placed the duffle bags down for me “thank you so much” I said to him, picking up both bags as I went inside “this is cute though, I can’t lie. It is cosey, this is serious. I think I am going to have a fat sleep you know” least he is impressed “did you bring your medication?” I asked, I didn’t even check “it’s all in there, and the lotion” I sniggered “ok good, well you ain’t complaining too much like I assumed” I thought he was going to say a lot more “it’s cool, I like the space” I breathed out in relief “check like nobody can come in” he said “oh yeah” placing the latch on the door “I can take my thing off now” nodding my head as he started to take his balaclava off, least he is comfortable to do this. I assumed he may have hated that he would have hated to show himself, but he isn’t, I think he is over it now “I like it you know, this is sweet, and I am glad I came with you” I don’t care what he says.

I think Oakley is loving the space, mind you he is in a single bed in Wadz place, so this is exciting to him “you look so happy” he grinned “I am, it’s peak you know. Just some space, and I like this blanket, it’s warm” pushing back his hat a little “how you feeling anyways tired? Look at all this fruit they got here” I pointed out, I pushed for it. I said that I wanted it to be fruit and not sweet because I want him to have it “you can have it” I frowned “no, I want you to have some, come on. Who doesn’t like strawberry, look how nice it is. Try some for me” he shook his head “stop being hard” he chuckled “I wish I could” he joked “you really can’t?” I don’t believe him “I can’t, I just don’t feel it” I don’t know why my eyes diverted to his dick “so like what happens if I wanted a baby from you?” I questioned “you would need to open my ball sack and physically get it” I snorted laughing “shut up, you’re so dumb!” I still want him to have some strawberry “a little bit for me please” he sighed out, holding it to his lips, he leaned forward and took a little bite “mhmm” he looked at me “not hard is it hard ass” I chuckled “sometimes it is for me. You going to watch your movie, what it is about?” he is interested “it’s about when an American girl finds love in London, and that boy is just a thug and messes up and it’s so sad because they both love each other” his smile grew “you’re so jarring, I can’t even” he side eyed me “how!?” I spat “you just are, put it on. I want to see it” placing the strawberry in my mouth “is it really though?” he asked “nah, that is about us” I sniggered “I knew it” he laughed “you made a story out of your ass, annoying” looking over at him laughing, the fact he believed me makes it even better.

I am between watching the movie and doing Oakley’ nails, he fell asleep like always, I didn’t expect much but I am glad he came so who am I to even complain, looking over at my phone vibrating on the side, I put it on vibrate just in case someone called and Ti is calling, placing his hand over my leg “hello” I answered, pausing my movie “I am not interrupting anything am I?” she asked “oh no, I am just watching the movie and just doing his nails” she went silent “excuse me?” she spat “just making them pretty, he usually does his nails but like nobody does it really, if I tell you this next thing you may judge me so I won’t” I said “he is there just letting you?” she questioned “tell me!” she spat “he is asleep, he fell asleep and no” I refuse to tell her “but tell me what did you want?” I am not going to tell her I did his feet too because she will fall out screaming because it’s me, I don’t do much for anyone “bitch erm, Aziel isn’t sleeping. He just keeps getting out of bed and coming to me” letting out an oh “then something is upsetting him, just let him sleep in bed with you. It’s fine, you don’t need to be strict with him” I chuckled “that’s fine, Aziel mommy said you can sleep in bed with me come here” I snorted laughing “are you being harsh with him!?” I spat “no, you said make sure his own bed because he gets used to it” she is right I did say that “so tell me, you both had sex” she is so nosey “nope, and shut up. Give Aziel a kiss from me, I got to go” putting the phone down because she is a troll and is going to annoy me.

Oakley hasn’t even realised I did that but the look on his face he is thinking, I mean he eating his oats, slowly but he is eating it “you want to try my fries?” he looked at me “my nails look shiny, what did you do?” I sniggered “I may have given you a little clean up, I did your feet too” his mouth hung open “really?” he said in shock “really” he spat “yeah, you was asleep anyways. I just did it while watching the movie” he is stunned “wow, thank you” reaching over with a fry in hand “have some, it’s potato, nothing bad” he shook his head “ok but what about fruit? You’re having oats, so you can have fruit with that” he has to eat “why did you do that for me?” he mumbled “because I care about you Oakley, nothing bad. I wanted to do it, it’s nothing” he nodded his head “thank you” I smiled “don’t be, you tell me what you want to watch I can put it on they have everything on here” he can chose something “erm like maybe something to do with gangster stuff, Scarface or something” smiling at him “sure, anything boring for you, it will be my turn to fall asleep” he sniggered “seriously though, thank you, you didn’t need to do that” I cooed out “don’t thank me, it’s fine. I enjoyed it, I mean not the feet part but yeah” I said smiling.

Oakley placed his arm over his face laughing “look at you so happy about this big bed, snuggled up in the covers” he can’t stop smiling, he moved his arm and putting a finger up at me as I stopped recording “I won’t post that, it’s just for me. Don’t worry” he is smiling, and I like that “it’s fine, but yeah I like this bed” climbing onto the bed and sitting a top of the covers facing him “how’s your dating scene going anyways, you going to these places you got to have met someone?” here he goes “erm dating scene is dry, I can’t lie. What about you?” he grinned “it’s dry, dry as my skin currently” rolling my eyes “are you wanting to date again?” he shrugged “maybe not” placing my phone down “I just regret what I did to you, without playing around on the subject. I did say I would bring it back up but like, it’s the thing I wish I could rewind back. I fucked up so bad, to hurt the guy that loves me. It does haunt me, and it’s lonely” he just doesn’t understand how much I do miss him “I am not even being funny but you are young and the dating scene, there is plenty of others” I huffed out “you want me to try and get this better, there is no better so shut up” he is going to annoy me “there is, I don’t know why you even took a liking to me, it baffles me to this day” tilting my head to the side “then why was you so kind to me, that baffles me too” I did it back to him “you bought me that Cartier bracelet that I wear to this day, you didn’t need to do that but you did so?” he rolled his eyes “you don’t like it do you, you had Kenza around and yet you still came to me” he started closing his eyes and I just swatted him “wow! You once again abusing a man that is unwell” he said “you close those eyes again and you will see” now he wants to close his eyes “I know I fucked up, and I just want you. I want to be with you” Oakley huffed out “we can be friends but like with everything, I just don’t want too” he said, “but you don’t forgive me?” he just stared at me “you let your mom drag me through shit and then you backtracked, it was fucked up” putting my head down “but if I don’t wake up one day, or I die and I never said it to you verbally, in my heart it says otherwise” looking up at him teary eyed “don’t say that” I mumbled.

Oakley and I woke up at the same time, it was kind of funny “who did this” lifting my hand up with his in mine “you” he blames me for everything “you blame me for everything” I can feel that this was all night because it’s sweaty “you want to use the bathroom before I go in and take so long” he nodded his head as we both let our hands go “that was you though” so he says “I’ll take the blame, it’s fine” I shrugged “you want to blame me so I’ll take it” he got out of bed and I just instantly looked to his dick and he doesn’t have a boner so maybe he is right with what he said, I am not judging him but I’m just being nosey “you look happy” he is smiling a lot “I had the best sleep I can’t lie” poking my lips out “you’re adorable” he went to the bathroom, I sighed out. I know I didn’t do that hand thing, he must have because I fell asleep before he did I think, he was still watching TV. Getting out of bed and stretching my body out, I think I slept well too so we both did really. Looking behind me as he came out of the bathroom “are you ok? We are having breakfast” he laughed “talking about we” he sat down on the edge of the bed “because we are, you’re eating too” making my way over to him, placing my hand on his shoulder “you want to have a bath?” He shook his head “just in pain, I’m good. I’ll be ok, I’m gonna just go back to sleep for a little, you don’t mind right?” Shaking my head “go for it, I’m just going to get ready and I take my time so just sleep it off, go on. Get into bed” he nodded his head as he got back into bed and I placed the covers over him “too much fun” he laughed “I’m just always tired, I hate it. I hate my life” I shushed him “your body is going through a lot Oakley, be kind to your body” I don’t expect him to be better or even ok that quick, my heart hurts for him “I’m sorry” he apologised “for what?” I am confused why he said sorry to me “I’ve not been fun company just off and on with my emotions and how I am” I cooed out “do not apologise, I wanted you here as company and you fulfilled that, dumbass” he chuckled, he is so silly to even apologise.

I decided to have Oats, I don’t know why but I did because I want him to eat, I want him to have breakfast with me properly so I decided to have oats, with fruit, it’s too healthy because I wanted something fattening but that didn’t happen so here we are “you like it?” Nodding my head “I mean is delicious” I gulped, he laughed “you don’t like it, I like it” so he says “then eat it, look at this, I mean orange and some oats mhmm delicious” he pulled a face “is it though” nodding my head “hear me out right, out the fruit in the oats and have it, blueberries, try it” picking the blueberries and putting it in his oats “why you doing this?” He questioned and I shrugged “because I want you to eat” he stared at me “I don’t want you to think I pity you, I love you Oakley, I do. I care about you, I want you better because Aziel deserves to see you and you deserve to take him out and have fun, I want you to try” Oakley sighed out “also I think I’ll be going to America soon, so I won’t be around. Just for work, maybe my mother. You know what she is like but I’ll be gone there, for a week or two don’t miss me too much” I added “you can find your better” I scoffed “fuck you” I just had to say it “rude” he said “you know what I am trying and all I get is shit” he shrugged “you know when you love someone and you know that the person can do better anyways, and we get judged and the the person says it from their own lips that they can, it hurts” putting my head down “and now I look like this, I can’t even look at myself. I took pride in my hair, I haven’t seen a mirror still and I look away from it, I don’t know what you see but I know it’s not anything nice, you think I’m going to be positive, those words stick with me, I’m sorry” I swallowed hard “but we friends, and I appreciate that, so thank you” I sniffled “don’t cry” I shook my head “I have to live it down knowing that was the words that will stick with you before you had this therapy, it fucks me up ok” I sobbed out getting up, it fucks me up badly and I don’t think I can ever fix it.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfic #Chrianna Fanfiction #Fanfiction

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wangbotam · 5 months

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if ur accepting asks rn can u explain a bit of ur cookie run trivia game? i was totally lost on a lot of questions

to be honest im not sure how to explain most of them because almost every single question can actually be easily checked through some googling, so i dont think i can go into detail on most of them, but i can provide some commentary

heres a link again if anyone wants to do the quizz, because im going to give away the answers. its just for fun so you can decide whether you think its worth spending like 20 minutes of your life playing it. anyway heres what i can say about some of the questions:

Until which update was this cookie included in the credits of CROB?

i hate this question because it proves how stupid i was. it was originally 'what is this cookies OFFICIAL name, not counting social media?' because i was under the belief that banana peel was only ever called 'ch17' and the official name 'banana cookie' only came from devsisters namedropping her on social media.

turns out im wrong and im a dumbass, she WAS already called banana cookie, but only in korean, and i didnt realise because i didnt look hard enough on her wiki page in the cookie run wiki. i am the fucking idiot of the century.

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Not counting Kakao Cookie Run, which of these games never released outside of South Korea?

looking back, i think this question may be one of the easiest. if i had the hindsight that this question is stupid as hell, id have made it centered around 'cookie run the darkest night' instead, because that was a game i only found out existed while researching to make the quizz and it gave me one of the funniest cookie run screenshots ive ever seen.

hes just standing there. menacingly.

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What Cookie was meant to be part of CR:OB's starting roster, but released years later instead?

i cant provide insight on the question itself but i can provide some trivia! according to context, since CROB (then named Cookie Run 2, which is fucking hilarious) started production around 2015, its heavily implied by dinosour was meant to be a CROB original! this is heavily supported by the fact he had a completely different design than what he ended up with, just like popcorn. as an added bonus, theres two cookies who were the inverse: meant for kakao but released for CROB instead. im not gonna say who they are, because i might make an extended version of the quizz someday, but you can find out who they are by googling.

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Which of these Cookies were leaked early into Kingdom's lifespan, but never released?

i first showed the quizz to a kakao-centric group im a part of and there were some concerns on how the question was worded, because ALL the answers in this question are cookies who were shown in early promotional material but never released (at least not yet), but orange cookie - as far as i know, from the answers i inserted - was the only one to have been at least close to completion but never released. this is the same limbo that carol and matcha found themselves for years, but unfortunately orange hasnt escaped it yet.

notably, there was a leak VERY early into kingdoms lifespan - i believe this may have been around the time of kumihos release - that showed real life photos of each cookies gacha screen, or at least mockups, and there were two very notable cookies there, orange and devil. devil ended up releasing (and i think they may be the only rare cookie added post-game launch?) but orange never did. i honestly dont know why, my first guess is that she may not fit the games aesthetic of high medieval fantasy but thats clearly not true because shining glitter exists.

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Which of these following Devsisters games have had more than one actual appearence in a Cookie Run game?

this one may also be one of the most unfair, if only because 99% of devsisters non-cookie run catalogue of games is so obscure that theres barely any footage for most of them, and i think some of them may even be lost media. get THAT! mish is probably one of the most well known, and even then ive only seen two whole videos of its gameplay in the years since ive known this game exists. i actually didnt even know 'pandadogs pizza' was a game that existed until i started researching for this quizz! the answer is still available on the internet though as obscure as it is so im confident that its still relatively fair, compared to...

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Finally: Which of these costumes leaked YEARS before their actual release?

this is my favorite question. im like, 99% sure its almost completely impossible to find any proof of this, and i almost considered not including it for this very reason, but its one of my favorite facts about cookie run because it makes me feel like im part of a Cool Kids Club for knowing about it. some of you may hate me for it, but i fucking love it. anyway, for context:

back in late 2020, shortly before we had any info on the first TBD update, i was in a server that had a super secret leaks channel, and the first leak ever posted when i joined that server was this TBD leak. it was very low quality photos (just like oranges leak), but like, even more low quality. i can vividly remember:

1 - croissant cookies ability sprite, which most of us thought was actually a pilot costume

2 - some of timekeepers sprites, probably their talksprites, alongside rogueforts costume, which made us assume timekeeper was actually a super epic/legendary costume concept for roguefort (this was before we knew legendary costumes were exclusively for legendary cookies in CROB)

3 - everyone assuming the island of memories was getting an update for some fucking reason

4 - and finally, cherrys TBD costume alongside one of zombies costumes (though i dont remember which). i remember thinking it was super weird that cherrys costume was nowhere to be found when the update finally released, and turns out devsis just put it in the backburner for the time being. why? nobody knows! this is also why i put zombie in as one of the answers.

anyway yeah this question is completely unfair and im aware of it. ive since had a falling out with the owner of the server that had these leaks so unfortunately i cant show proof of their existence, but trust me, theyre real. cookie run leaks were a lot less prevalent (at least compared to how common they are nowadays) back then, especially because cookie run was still super niche in 2020, so i assume these leaks didnt spread very far.

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finally, a question i wanted to add but didnt was about 'which cookie got nerfed mere hours/minutes after their release?'. its related to a weird memory i have of opening up the tumblr app before school started to see people in the cookie run tag talking about how op lemon was and how he got nerfed shortly after he released because he was just that op. to give credence to my memory, yeah, he was super busted back then - he kind of scored like nobody had ever seen up til that point in CROB, at least until lime stole the title of most OP release from him (this was before we knew how bad cookie runs score inflations would get).

but i couldnt find any proof that this was real? like, im sure it was, i even told one of my classmates about it because it was so absurd to me, but when i started research for the quizz i couldnt find people talking about it. admittedly its AWFUL to look up anything cookie run related nowadays, even if you filter your search, because its all gonna be about modern CROB and CRK and you cant escape from it. but this made me question whether my memory is right or not! i know for a fact the cherry question is 100% real, but lemon.... that was in 2018 and my memory sucks, so i didnt include it. can anyone confirm whether my memory is real or fake? greatly appreciated.

anyway that turned out longer than i anticipated, but it was fun. i love sharing weird obscure tidbits about cookie run, especially because it seems nowadays the fandom isnt very interested in it. maybe someday ill make an Obscure Cookie Run Facts 2 or whatever, but i think for now this quizz is pretty hard enough as is.

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raecaw · 7 months

Text

i know that 7 identities test thing is total bullshit especially since it includes intersex (a biological aspect) in a gender identity test

but i took it anyway cuz im avoiding going to sleep and i felt so much relief when i saw the 93% transgender result.

(fuck this post got long heres a readmore)

i gaslight myself all the time and an idiot lives in my brain who shouts at me to just put up with being a girl and live a normal life on easier mode and make everyone around me happy and more comfortable

ive been haunted by the girl thoughts almost as much as I was haunted by the boy thoughts when i was nb and they both make me want to cry.

but the boy thoughts crying was about fear, and the girl thoughts crying was about sadness and disappointment and giving up. i think thats really important. im scared to be a boy but if i give up and be a girl it will feel like im self harming. i tried staying in the middle as nonbinary but i just..... suit being a boy. i sit like a boy and i laugh and joke like a boy. im a boy like how omar rudberg is a boy. i think swooshy capes and skirts are neat. if i passed as a boy, I'd wear dresses. genuinely the only thing stopping me from wearing whatever i want is the fear that I'll be called "miss" or "that lady" because thats.... not me. but I'm not an idiot, i know what society is like. If I wear feminine clothing i will be misgendered.

my idiot brain parasite tells me im mentally ill and im trans because of it. or im trans because my IUD fucked with my hormones. or im trans cuz i might have pcos. i sometimes hope i get a pcos diagnosis because it would take the pressure off of making the decision myself. i could use it as an excuse. some scientists consider pcos to be an intersex condition.

ouran high school host club was always so special to me because i wanted to belong platonically in a group of men. i had a group of male friends in high school but my G cups prohibited me from ever truly belonging. 4 of the guys in that group confessed their feelings to me. They were all straight. It was alienating.

when i was little, i played house with my best friend next door. I was always the daddy and she was always the mummy. I never questioned it.

I played DnD with my ex boyfriend and his friends. One night they made a joke about me getting spit-roasted. everyone laughed. It reminded me that no matter what I would always be Othered by men.

I have a close friend who is a trans man. I knew him before he began his transition. when I was nonbinary he'd jokingly call me brother and sir in the group chat, unaware of my massive smile and my beating heart that confused the hell out of me. why did i love being called sir? why did it make me smile so wide?

I watched heartstopper and saw myself in Nick. that show made me cry so hard. It's so soft and warm.

When I was nonbinary i was haunted by The Boy Thoughts. I dared not even think them, yet they sneaked in like water between the cracks of the arid desert. If I ever gave those thoughts the time of day I would burst into tears without fail. That was a little hint. I was so so scared. Nonbinary was safe, charted territory. my older sibling had just come out as NB. but it never fully settled with me. never clicked.

When I was 12 i was very lonely. so lonely in fact that i had an imaginary friend called Kai. He came to ballet class with me and stayed with me on the bus. He comforted me when I cried myself to sleep and waved at me in the mirror. I dressed up as him once in the secret of my bedroom. I took one look in the mirror and let the fear take over. When I was told I was moving to another country I had a talk with Kai and I left him in England with a tearful goodbye. Turns out he followed me here too.

When I was 17, I picked men's glasses at the optometrist while my dad was away for a moment. When he came back he shouted at me in the store. I stood my ground but the glasses were ruined for me. I still wonder what the staff thought of my dad and I.

I asked my mum to cut my hair short when I was 7. She gave me a bob and I hated it, so she refused to cut it short again. I didn't know what I wanted but a bob wasn't it.

eventually she let me cut it short again when i was 16. It was still too long and it looked awkward. I made the best of it though, and my favourite selfies were the ones where I looked like a boy.

When I was in year 11 my high school finally allowed female students to wear pants in winter. We previously had to wear skirts. I was ecstatic and expected lots of girls to do it. I was the only one but I didn't mind, I was finally comfortable.

I have a very low voice when I'm speaking naturally. I had assumed that it was an unattractive feature until my partner told me he was bi and thought my low voice was hot. it opened a door for me, because I thought the only way for me to be attractive and to be loved was to lean into my femininity.

I have big boobs and an hourglass figure and big hips and pink lips. I was taught that i had to dress to my figure and fix my masculine traits in order to be loved (see: less lonely) but I always felt empty and used and disgusted when men were attracted to me in that presentation. I thought that was a universal experience.

Last weekend I dressed up for a birthday dinner. I wore a lace shirt and a well fitted blazer over my binding tape. I never felt so genuinely sexy.

I think I'm a boy.

#uhhhh i should tag this properly #personal stories about realizing im a trans man

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