#ive been feeling so meh

[thatonechocogirl]

been feeling sick lately but heres koda waking up with his hair looking like a cockatoo

[aurorangen]

got around to doing the living room today

[madderruz]

bravern mspaint doodles to shake off the rust

[gilbirda]

what are your thoughts on watcher’s new announcement?

So.

I've been watching the Boys since they started back in 2016 (i think around that era), and honestly I'm very conflicted about the decision. I've read so much stuff in favor and against the announcement and I don't know if my answer will satisfy you.

I have managed a community and I have the blessing and curse of being somewhat of a Name, experiencing the ordeal of being Known, and I can tell you that 1)you can never please everyone 2)people will always rush to crush you the second you do something they don't agree with 3)people will always twist everything you do with the worst faith in mind and 4)fandom forget very quickly that at the end of the day you are just human.

I think they made a calculated risk based on a purely economical viewpoint. I think they considered their loyal fanbase and how willing people have been so far with spending extra cash to support them — The live shows, the exclusive streams (like the Valentine's Too Many Spirits) and Patreon. How much of their fanbase was the "broke students" tumblr claim they are and how much was people with spending money willing to pay extra for them.

I also think that the decision seem stupid if you look at it from the perspective of "why the hell would I pay $6 to watch such little variety of content?" and that's a Correct Assumption, but Observe — they have been very slowly pulling everyone that made Buzzfeed famous and enrolling them in. Very recently they gathered the Worth It boys, the second show that kind of carried Buzzfeed back in the day (apart from the Try Guys). I think they can't talk about it right now, but the goal is to relaunch Buzzfeed but without ads and without making it the soulless content machine it became. I think their dream and goal has always been making what Buzzfeed could have been with better management, kind of like "If I was the Management in this company, things would have been better" dream fulfillment. That's why they made the direct jump to a streaming service instead of the logical steps of Patreon-exclusive content or even jumping to Nebula like other youtubers. It was never meant to stay one single channel, it was supposed to be bigger.

Is the projection of making a "better Buzzfeed" worth risking this step? Time will tell. I don't know. I personally never cared about anyone except Buzzfeed Unsolved. I still watch Unsolved on repeat. Is my comfort show. Maybe they are overestimating how much people care about other shows not hosted by them.

Although they did hint that "we want shows not hosted by us". This tells me that they are settling down, they want to ramp down a little bit, do the hook with Ghost Files aka Unsolved Supernatural Lite for the streaming service, and once people are hooked, launch more shows by the old-school Buzzfeed people. Won't be as big as a show hosted by Shane and Ryan, but it will still make people feel like they are getting their money's worth.

I would forgive all of this if only they didn't use the excuse of "if we want to do Netflix-level productions we need money". I'm sorry but that means nothing to me. We loved them when it was a powerpoint slide show with 2 idiots in a set. We didn't fall in love with the toys or the trips or the high tech. We didn't fall in love with the fancy animations at the beginning of Ghost Files episodes that they are so proud of. That was all their idea.

I've seen this trend of content creators ramping up their creations to an unsustainable point, completely crash and burn and then having to apologize about having to step back. Then making it the moral trap of an argument that they have been doing their best to bring quality content to their audience, and of course making it impossible to argue against. If you speak up and say "well we never asked you to break your back" then you are ungrateful audience. That's exactly what's going on in here with the Watcher announcement — "true fans" criticizing people who point out the fact that they created this money problem on their own. Is not the fanbase responsibility to cater to a company's bad money decisions. Is not our fault that they decide to scale up their operation to a point they "haven't been making a profit for 2 years". It's unfair that the fans are at each other's throats for daring stepping back and saying "I don't want to be part of this".

I don't think Watcher Entertainment is actively wanting to collapse their fandom like this. I don't think this was a calculated move. But I do think that they are a group of adults trying to make a career of something they enjoy doing. I think they made this move with the perspective that fandom is not end all and they can always rebuild it.

— And that they are planning on making a machine that can work without them, and that requires breaking something in the fans, it requires kicking themselves out of the pedestal fans have put them on. They know they won't be allowed to have a normal life until people stop looking at them waiting for them to say their phrase.

In conclusion I think they made a choice that made sense if they are planning on separating Watcher Entertainment from "The Ghoul Boys" fame, and it makes sense if they are aiming at something bigger than what they've been doing now. Money of course is the goal and the reason presented, but there's a lot that they are not saying and we will not know until it happens.

Until then, it does feel like they have just shot their careers in the foot.

Also I'm salty that I can't join the service because I'm outside the US.

[edns]

Doodle while I perish from heatwave and work on some comics <3

[pink-lemonadefairy]

🌻 ₊˚⊹ ࿔ 🌳

[junotter]

sometimes researching for avatar redesigns has you 6 layers deep into the Japan's Meiji era allies wiki

[allylikethecat]

January OTP Prompts

Another one that was really hard for me to get out 🤦🏻‍♀️ I need to start writing these earlier in the day and not when I'm about to go to bed and have mentally checked out for the day already. BUT we did it! Got it written! Thank you so much to everyone who has been following along on this little adventure with me! It's been a struggle, and I know that my prompt fills aren't always my best work, but here we are, day 13 and I haven't missed one yet! 🎉

Warnings: descriptions of vomiting and implied drug use / withdrawal

13. Secret

Matty tucked his legs up to his chest, trying to make himself seem smaller, having convinced himself that if he took up less space, there would be less space inside him for the hurt to fester. There would be less space for the secrets that were eating him alive to grow as he choked on his organs and spat blood in the snow. He tried to focus on breathing through his nose as nausea churned in his belly and salvia filled his mouth. He clenched his jaw and squeezed his eyes shut, his nails biting into his palm as he mentally willed himself not to get sick. 

He could hear George in the front lounge, the click clack of his keyboard like nails being hammered into Matty’s skull even over the hum of the bus speeding down the interstate. He pressed his fingers to his lips, his breath shallow. He was going to be sick. He resented George, why couldn’t he be sleeping like the rest of the guys, breathing quietly in his bunk. George was going to see him as he stumbled out of his bunk and into the bathroom. George was going to hear him wrench as he coughed up bile. His stomach clenched and he was scrambling, tripping over himself on unsteady legs, his body aching, his joints protesting as he scurried from the bunk to the bathroom. As predicted, George looked up at the commotion. 

“Matty?” George asked with a frown as Matty blew past him, shoving his way into the cramped bathroom, dropping heavily onto his knees just in time to dry heave. 

“Matty are you alright?” George asked, standing up from the couch he was working on. There wasn’t enough space for both of them in the bathroom, so he hovered awkwardly in the doorway, watching Matty heave, his back shaking as he vomited. 

“Go away,” he rasped, wiping his mouth with a piece of toilet paper before resting his cheek on the toilet seat, his neck felt too weak to continue supporting his pounding head. He didn’t want George to see him like this. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this. It was easier if he kept it a secret, his own secret struggle. 

“Are you ill?” George asked, reaching a hand out like he wanted to touch Matty, like he wanted to fix him. Like he was capable of fixing him. If Matty didn’t feel like his skin was crawling, like his body was trying to turn itself inside out, he would have laughed. George couldn’t fix him, he didn’t even know the extent of how fucked up he was. 

“I said go away!” Matty snapped, anger flaring in his chest, burning bright as it mingled with self pity. He squeezed his eyes shut, surprising himself when he realized he was crying. George needed to leave. They needed to get to the next venue, to the hotel, to a rest stop, to anywhere where Matty could get at his bag stored under the bus. The crook of his elbow burned as he ached for his secret. 

Day: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12

[seilon]

pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah

con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines

[call-me-pup2]

Not being very brave about my tummy ache 😞

[waddingham]

want to write but I simply cannot decide what I want to focus on after finishing that last one

[shdwtouch]

I don't know what to do with myself to be honest ._. it's been a tumultuous couple of days, both good and bad, and I'm just. at a loss of what I want to do now. if I want to do anything. I don't really have a ton of energy to dedicate to things currently, but I'm bored and just. meh. #depression

also I just want to express how thankful I am for everyone who has followed me and expressed interest in shade ♡ it means a lot. I was really nervous about engaging with the bg3 fandom but I feel comfortable and welcome here. I am incredibly grateful for the interest, kindness, and patience I have been shown thus far. thank you all ! I hope I won't disappoint, and can continue to offer ic content ♡

[waatched]

“If you killed me, would you make it good? Would you make it holy?“

[audaciiaearchive]

i am pondering taking a break or smth. idrk

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[xamaxenta]

kinda lost interest in completing any of my current wips