#ive also changed some age things since the last time ive mentioned them
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doerot · 2 years ago
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What do you mean when you refer to some of your characters as prequel?
HI OK SO my story (that still has no name, sorry, I know that kinda makes it confusing when I talk about it) is split up into 2 distinctive parts: the Main Story and the Prequel. The main story follows a trio of kids (renée, deliah, and matiás) as they travel across the continent and make allies and over throw the government and defeat the big evil yadda yadda it's a k-12 teen fantasy story yknow the drill lmao. The Prequel, however, follows mainly leon and kana, two mentor figures to the trio, and how they came to act the way they do and know the things they do, it's main function is to provide exposition and further background that the trio really have no business ever knowing. Another major element is that the 2 parts have very different tones. The underlying theme of the main story will always be Hope. To have hope and search for love and friendship and keep going when things seem utterly bleak. But for the prequel, it's a tragedy. There is no happy ending, and you know that from the start. You meet characters that feel important, but you have never seen before, characters that you know but can't recognize anymore. The main story starts with the world completely broken, and the prequel shows you how it got to that point
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thelordoffortune · 7 months ago
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dragon age: the veilguard companion breakdown
decided to do a little break down of the companions from the trailer
(and their concept art)
so after seeing this earlier
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i realised we had seen most of the companions in iterations before, and wanted to do a lil break down. i feel theres no point in finding them in other media, since its already been done :>
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so this is the companion line up from this behind the scenes video.
left to right, i think we have a character harding replaced, taash, an early human version of davrin, rook, an early version of an executor/veil jumper which was then replaced with bellara, lucernis, a character who has then been replaced with neve, and a mortalitasi character replaced by emmrich.
this is super interesting to me! in the same dev diary we get to see bellara and davrin for the first time
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Bellara im not too sure we have seen much more of unless she ties into the concept art of these guys. makes me wonder if they were the same thing earlier on and were split in development.
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Davrin and harding also mentioned in this leak, "another knight dude and a female dwarf rogue." pretty sure at this point people were expecting harding or varric to be a companion, so not much of a surprise.
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what i find super interesting, is that both lucanis and taash have appeared in so much of the party concept art we have seen
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not necessarily in their final iterations, but this rogue/antivan crow and the dual axe wielding qunari. i think these two and davrin are going to be pretty core to the overall story, considering how long we have been seeing them.
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these two i dont have much to say on. i think they were added or changed pretty late in development. i think its interesting that we have seen these skelly guys several times over the last few years, but its just a human necromancer in the reveal. (i hope he is secretly a skeleton lol) i have less to say about neve, i think she swapped out with someone somewhere between her first appearing in tevinter nights and the missing.
thats pretty much it, might make another breakdown on some of the locations and what we have seen of them so far later on. lmk if ive missed anything, im sure theres a deep cut somewhere im missing lol
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sabrondabrainrot · 10 months ago
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I forget I can just ramble and rant my thoughts!
I try to focus on sharing just my art but I also do writing and try to have a bit of a critical mind when it comes to media I consume.
Now that it has been a few months since I watched all of TMNT 12 I do have some thoughts and opinions and kind of want to just ramble about it before I forget, in an informal manner.
I at first really liked it, it was the second TMNT show I watched after Rise, now that I've been watching the 87 and 03 shows my opinions on 12 did change just a bit but I still do like it!
Literally all the turtles are my son's now. Especially Leonardo (he's blue coded so-). I just think they're so cute and neat!!!
I'm going to put thoughts to spoiler stuff of 12 so if you plan to watch the show then don't click beyond this point!
🐢💙🐢♥️🐢🧡🐢💜
So in the last season of TMNT 12 it kind of feels like all the scrapped ideas or random plots that couldn't be fit into the prior seasons were put in this one? I really like the new op it gives of Cowboy Bebop vibes. The op song change is really nice to because I never really looked the tmnt 12 op song before.
However, the plots feel all over the place? There's a mini ark where they're jumping through time meeting Halloween monsters and then another ark where Mikey defeats Satan? Then we get another really tiring ark that's this implied alternate madmax fury road parody that is honestly so depressing? Donnie is just dead.
Which btw, the show likes killing ppl off for dramatic effect. They killed Master Splinter three times and had Mikey and Donnie get scattered to atoms on two separate occasions. I should also mention Leo was in a coma for 3 months with no IV or anything and he woke up relatively fine.
Anyways, going into the last season and stuff leading up to it... They kind of ended with the 87 turtles and the 12 boys finding new passion and inspiration from teaching the 87 boys. I didn't really vibe with it because it just made the 87s the butt of the joke and made them out to be incompetent silly little guys.
They ARE silly little guys but the thing is they're not incompetent. The 87 boys have done some insanely incredible things even when unarmed. Especially when unarmed. I actually think the angle of finding a new way to help people as a means to end the series on an inspired note is fine, the 87 boys even carried on the will and told Bebop and Rocksteady they can be more than Shredder's mutant henchmen. It is very cute and wholesome. I just think they could have maybe done it differently?
Why not set up for them to teach Chi arts? The turtles of 87 don't have any mystical abilities and it would have been interesting to do a set up like that? There are ways to write the finale without just dumping on the original source.
Focusing back on the ending of 12, we also leave on a seriously alarming note. It's just a big mixed bag. After Master Splinter went to run on the hamster wheel in the sky, Leonardo was handed the reigns of the family. He was told "You're the teacher now Leonardo. You're the father. Look after your brothers" and Splinter then willingly walked into his own death. I think the writers maybe thought this was amazing and inspirational or something but I found it incredibly messed up? We start tmnt 12 on all 4 boys birthday. Meaning Splinter himself considers them all to be the same age. And since the series was running they haven't on screen celebrated a birthday and from the implied weather changes most of the seasons 1-4 seem to take place over just a year??? We don't get a definitive timeline (or I'm a bad audience and didn't notice).
So one can only assume Master Splinter was telling his...15 year old son to be the father to his other 15 year old children.
Why do I bring this up at all? After Leonardo takes over the family and he KILLS shredder they go into this rushed cult demon resurrection arc that culminates in the classic dead walk the earth and Mikey defeats Satan. In this arc we meet a ghost splinter who does not even go to see his kids, he just helps Casey and April. But throughout and the lead up to this we have moments of Leo having conversations with what we can perceive as Sensei's ghost in the dojo.
But the climax of the arc cements splinters ghost has not once visited his son's.
So Leonardo is quite literally having full on conversations, in the dojo for his brothers to hear, with a hallucination of his dead dad. He's coping this way. His family does nothing about this.
Tmnt 2012 has the worst Splinter. He ignored his son's and chose favorites. He told Leonardo to die (season 1 finale). He calls Mikey dumb and insights the others to do it too. He told Raph his anger makes him exactly like Shredder and never elaborates or teaches him how to better work through his issues. And he straight up calls Donnie useless.
None of that is even an exaggeration. Adding context just makes it worse.
Here's a list:
Do you know the turtles are the equivalent of helicopter raised homeschool boys? They've never stepped foot outside of the lair except at the start of ep 1.
They learn ALL of their lessons from old shows and cartoons. The show writers even sometimes use the cartoons to set up the theme of the episodes!
When Leonardo rescues Mikey he pats him on the head to comfort him.
Literally almost all of their ninja weapons have hidden weapons. I love it I wish I saw more of them using them.
Michelangelo is the family chef because somehow none of the rest have any life skills. Not even Splinter (explains so much).
They all have such cute shape language. I love bean pole Donnie, blocky buff Raph, perfect pear Leo, and round freckled Mikey.
They also now have unique eye colors. I love their eyes. Donnie with his big beautiful brown eyes (sometimes they look red). Raph with his acid green stare into your soul eyes, they look like they would glow like mako eyes in ff7. Mikey with bright blue eyes all big and round. And then Leo with the cunning dark blue eyes!
I just want to pinch their cheeks and kiss their foreheads and give them hugs.
Also, Leo is so affectionate to kids and his brothers??? My heart??? Couldn't take it??? He just randomly hugs them?? He had a tea party??? He wore a pink feather boa? The way he just immediately held baby Miwa??? Too good. Too good. He's such a good big bro.
Raph is also such a soft guy. Like yes he's a Butthead that beats up his brothers and takes every single violent urge out on Leo when he's even minorly inconvenienced but he does learn to do better. He helps Leo a lot and he even is there for the others a lot too.
Raphael also does art and seems to like fine arts.
Raph, like Leo, is a resident baby man. He loved tiny helpless creatures. He had a pet turtle he loved with his entire being and then later on adopted a space alien baby turtle that he also loved with his entire being.
I love Donnie in this, his cute little tooth gap, his gentle demeanor, the fact he'd rather be in the lab than training. I feel bad for him tho cause he clearly wants Splinter and Leo's approval with his inventions and efforts but very rarely gets it (Leo is the only one to really praise him and get what he does). He's also a good team player but he has so much stress and no confidence.
Donnie needs a big ol hug.
Mikey is so cute. But he is so weird. Why did they write girly pop collecting underwear. Why did they have him cannibalize a mutant pizza man? They do the most random things with Mikey. I like that he avidly tries cheering ppl up. He tries so hard for his bros. He's just a sweet little guy. I wish they did more with the baby bro.
Mikey should have kept his lightning powers.
They fight a lot but all the brothers love each other. I think they're just stressed and cooped up too much.
I like drama tho it's juicy when they argue.
I read on the wiki that Donnie is supposed to be canon OCD and Mikey canon ADHD and it makes so much sense in the show.
I really like all their voices. I miss Leo's first voice he was so dorky and sweet. The new voice is all sad and serious. Raph sounds perfect. I like Donnie's voice but instead of him always yelling why not have him do the low angry science rant because that's a good time. I like Mikey's voice he sounds like a high pitched beast boy.
But despite the occasionally baffling writing choices of the show I still like it. It's entertaining in the same way as a telenovela or kdrama. They literally have a plot where one of the turtles falls in love with his secret half sister. Something I've seen in telenovelas and kdramas.
2012 tmnt makes a great dogblooded drama.
I think the CGI art can get pretty bad at times but other times it looks great. The music is pretty good and I really like the voice cast. I actually totally see why so many people like this show but I definitely don't think it's the best one. From what I've seen thus far, I think the 2003 TMNT show might actually be a masterpiece. Better than Avatar the Last Airbender levels of masterpiece (not a competition just giving an example of another show I find monumental).
That's it, that's the rant, thanks for reading!
Btw if any one has any good 12 fic recs pls hand them over. I need 12 hurt comfort, or fem Leo, or transfem Leo, or anything introspective, or just anything with a fun plot. Pls I'm dying here send fics.
Thank you :)
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abyssal-cryptid · 2 years ago
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Even more Tears of the Kingdom thoughts (SPOILERS)
I cant figure out how long after Calamity this game is set. It's got to be at least some years, everyone else has changed but Link and Zelda
Link and Zelda have lived this time together in Link's house in Hateno <<33
Their Well holds Zelda's secret room
Also yes every well in this game has something so my favorite thing rn is just jumping into wells
Zelda had a school built to Hateno because she loves kids
I hate how so many people in this game who should know who Link is dont know him
You mean to tell Ive been living in Hateno for years and no one recognises me
Zelda is still referred to as princess which implies she hasnt allowed herself to be crowned queen
Ive spent like three hours just strolling in Hateno
I did get the camera and my enjoyment of the game has increased tenfold
HATENO TECH LAB HAS A RUINED GUARDIAN I REPEAT HATENO HAS A GUARDIAN REMAIN
Im so excited I missed seeing these everywhere
Purah's room has drawings of them and the divine beasts
You can just pick up the koroks who need to be reunited w their friends with ultrahand and carry them wherever they want to go. They also roll down hills
Me @ the forbidden ruins in Kakariko: "Let me in, let me innnn"
SIDON HAS A FIANCE
IM SO DISTRAUGHT
THEY SAW US SHIP LINK AND SIDON AND WENT "none of that here is his gf"
HUDSON HAS A DAUGHTER <<33
This game has cheese. I can die happy now
I am taking the elevator up every time I see a falling rock
Went to Akkala Citadel Ruins. Was looking at the views. SUDDENLY EVERYTHING GOES RED AND HANDS ARE CHASING ME WHAT THE FUCK
The way they dont let my boy have his long hair out on any fits is criminal. Could have tweaked the armor sets that much
Why is Zelda appearing everywhere and being an evil menace??? Zelda tf is going on w you?? Arent you supposed to be in the past
They looked at me, specifically, loving side quests more than my life and going "we have to give them more" and this is a good day
There's a golden horse???
Also I heard Yunobo is a dick in this??? Not my boy :(
I go to the Zora tower and there is a man nearly dead
ALSO OH MY GOD WHY DID ZELDA ATTACK KING DOREPHAN
Man was dying (Lets hope this doesnt age poorly because I dont think I could handle it)
So its been like five years at least since BOTW ended and like. Why does no one remember me and also where did all these new people come from that didnt exist here couple years ago?? Where were yall?? Having tea??
Kilton has a little brother <3
I should get back to the "first" main questline as in the Rito are dying in a blizzard but there's pretty flowers and mayoral elections
Did I already mention they did not nerf bows? They didnt and I love that, archers for life
Also I lost Hestu again and I need more inventory
I am afraid to venture into the Korok Forest
Stables are so fun. You get points from first visit, staying the night, registering horses etc AND THEY GIVE YOU REWARDS
I got the Traveler's Gear for General (my baby boy horse)
I found Big Horse and named him Babylon
Also saved this one guy stuck in a cave
Starting to get to a point where enemies drop 15-30 fuse power parts and life is getting easier
Ive activated like 20 shrines since I last did a bunch. I havent done them because what if I have to build vehicles (bad)
I miss cryonis
Havent done much in the sky tbh
I want my champions tunic. I however dont feel like going to the castle
Where the fuck is Ganondorf
I could always see him in BOTW I dont like this
I am kind of disappointed they didnt change the looks of old armor sets. HOWEVER. Cece's hat is all Im going to say. I wonder if I can wear that to Gerudo town
Im still a one shot to so many things
The Zora are dying (their water is turning into mud)
Gorons have malice pink eyes so dont trust theyre doing too well either
Barbarian armor fits so well with Link's messy long hair
Im still kind of shocked that the sheikah tech is just gone
How do I get into Hateno tech lab
Some of yall are actually building vehicles? Im avoiding that like the plague
Still salty about Sidon
I get taken for a little while and he gets engaged
His fiance did refer to Sidon as "my best friend"
The quote went "Im Prince Sidon's... oh forgive me. I am your best friend's fiancee"
She us cute but still
ALSO THEY MOVED MIPHA'S STATUE TO THE TOP OF PLOYMUS MOUNTAIN
THE ZORA'S DOMAIN STATUE IS NOW OF LINK AND SIDON
Why cant I marry him
Sidon carries Mipha's trident now (sobs)
When you meet him he goes "Its good to see you my friend" so happily
"By the way... I hope you know that I am truly happy to see you again after such a long time apart, my dearest friend"
I sobbed
He loves us so much
Just go visit him
Sidon wont marry me and Sonia and Rauru are married, cant a man find some love in Hyrule
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crowlore · 1 month ago
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some datv ramblings and generally fair handed criticisms below the cut. nothing too massive bc each serious issue i had with the game could be an essay on its own. don’t assume that if it’s not mentioned here i dont have something to say on it. heavy spoilers ahead etc
first the disclaimer that ive been a dragon age fan for half my life. ive had 13 years to sit and stew on these games and their attached products and my opinions can change and evolve with time. my critiques come from a place of love and desire for positive growth of the ip. okay? okay.
veilguard was a Fun game, dgmw. easily the most replayable also. but i still hold the opinion that 2 was the last good dragon age game (in the sense that it’s engaging, has interesting writing, and Feels like dragon age), and there are still lots of people that hate it. i can defend a lot of the decisions made in veilguard’s production from the viewpoint of someone very familiar with the struggle of the development process just like i’ve done for every title. it’s harder to make games of this scope than many realize. knowing what i know of the early concepts for what became the finished product, and the massive shakeups during development, there’s a lot im willing to forgive in the presentation of information in game. the writing is a whole other issue, but as i said im not touching on the egregious points of writing criticism with this post.
i dont think the dialogue is nearly as big of a problem as many are saying, beyond the fact that it does go less in depth than past titles. complaints of “therapy speak” are largely overplayed and would have likely been completely overlooked if the surrounding dialogue was as deep as it was in early entries and if the emotional consideration generally put forward by rook was returned by their companions. also im self aware enough to acknowledge that beyond that this series has always had bogus line deliveries scattered throughout. it keeps me humble. i think the roleplaying is (marginally) better than inquisition’s (not saying much), personally, because rook feels more like a person than the inquisitor. of course that’s not a good thing for everyone, since plenty of players liked that the inquisitor’s background was largely irrelevant and they just sorta popped into being at the onset of the plot. it made it easier to shape them in your head, i get thet. but again personally i like a protagonist with established traits and mannerisms, much like hawke. i enjoy leaning into the mold the writers set up for them, and just filling out the grooves for flavor. i dont believe having a narrow objective for the tone and character of a story is inherently a bad thing - but i also think the writers missed out on a lot of opportunities to really dig into what they set up.
rook being groomed into a replacement prisoner for solas’ fade prison was a really tasty character writing choice that unfortunately needed a lot more backing - not everybody played a character they believed would regret their choices so severely! don’t be afraid to foreshadow things heavily! we all saw the varric reveal coming from a mile away so just own that decision! go crazy with your justifications.
the endings were. something. i guess. i understand the objective of the “secret” (not that secret) reconciliation ending, but it feels self congratulatory for the inquisitor more than anyone..and they don’t even have to want to save solas! it really just felt like a bone tossed at “fans” of solas’ character (said mockingly bc there are Those People that really don’t want to engage with the character as he’s written and just treat him as a fictional boyfriend rather than a narrative device worth examining). rook would have to be an idiot to take that bargain given everything solas has done to them, im sorry. (on that note: rook is meant to be an unpredictable wild card of a tactician - a mind to rival the dread wolf’s. i liked the suicide mission style role assignment segment a la mass effect 2 but show me more of that! show me more scheming. i want it!) i dont really care if it’s considered the “good” ending, or that it would make my inquisitor happy. but this is also coming from someone who thought solas’ character was Gravely mishandled in inquisition, and only became interesting and enjoyable as an antagonist in veilguard. (as an aside, i had to laugh at how solas’ memories painted a terribly pitiful “a woman made me do it” picture of his actions. STAND UP)
speaking of antagonists. elgar’nan is boring. im not sorry. his freaky immoral scientist sister was not only a more interestingly sinister villain, but there were more hidden depths to her than elgar’nan if you found those late game codex entries. i dont find unexamined unabashed evil interesting! god of tyranny, so what! give me MORE to work with here. the closest we got was getting to grill solas on how a massive factor in his pointed hatred for elgar’nan was that they were similar. stubborn, prideful, vindictive men who put themselves above others. that was something! give me more of that!
ultimately i see the gaps in the plot and character writing where there was meant to be more, and while i am disappointed by the lack of real meat on the bones of a game we’ve waited a decade for - i do still see where concessions had to be made. all this is also just me engaging with these points in isolation, devoid of connection to the grander themes and mishandling of real life implications. i dont hold back on those, but they’re for another post where i do more than just a stream of consciousness.
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pretty-little-martyr · 1 year ago
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hi I'm sorry if this is. idk awkward but I saw your tags on that post about changing how people talk about getting gynecologic care and you might want to look into vaginismus. It's a condition that causes those muscles to tighten up often very painfully anytime any sort of penetration is attempted. Physical therapy, dilators and muscles relaxers can help but ofc its something that should be discussed with a doctor to make sure you're getting the correct treatment. ALSO! You can request laughing gas for pap smears and other invasive gyno procedures. It is something they do. Usually if you tell them any insertion at all is extremely painful it'll be offered but if not you can ask for it. Some places might be able to do full sedation but I think that'd just depend on the facilities since that would require an anesthesiologist as well
and also vaginismus is like extremely super common (iirc at least 20% of people with vaginas experience it at some point in their lives) the problem is just that nobody talks about it because well. Society. this is not something abnormal or wrong with you in a bad way, it's just a medical condition that you happen to have and need accommodations for. if that helps at all
hey thank you for reaching out fr, it's not weird at all! ive been trying to figure out if it's that or just general "pelvic floor problems" whatever that entails. im getting HRT/gender care from Planned Parenthood these days, and they have told me i would Have to get another exam/smear next year (which i am terrified about tbqh) and they've mentioned they'd give me something or other to help, probably laughing gas like you've said (which ive never actually had).
i did tell that gyno that i'd never put anything in me and that even tampons were horribly painful, and their reaction was to act like i was crazy and lying and that never happens to anybody lmao the woman literally stared at me as if she was waiting for me to say 'haha just kidding' and asked me like 3 times over if i was sure i was a virgin at my big age (21 at the time). even after i was crying and bleeding and having a panic attack they were incredibly apathetic towards me. so! yeah. to be quite honest i'm not interested in dilators or physical therapy--not to knock them, i just want my whole shit removed, so why put in that effort and (probably) gain new trauma from putting things in me, yknow? the mere concept kinda makes me ill. im considering looking into surgery sometime soon-ish. my family might lose their shit about it, but, i dont think they can stop me now that i live by myself, and unless their insurance blocks it, i should be good to go on that.
anyway. id be so down to get fully sedated for it. put me under for like 30 minutes to get all that shit done and i dont have to be present for it or acknowledge it at all thanks. also might help in general, if the muscle tightening is something semi-voluntary/if that even is my issue. ive also considered if i just have a very small hole. i think thats referred to as a neovagina? i dunno.
i really appreciate these asks <3 very kind of you and. somehow i did not really register the potential of asking a different doctor about their thoughts on it i guess ASDFGHJK i just sort of. the initial event was traumatizing enough i still sometimes have nightmares, which is super dope, and remembering it too hard makes me feel very violated, so really i try not to talk about it so much. i was super fucking stoned last night, is probably why i even left those tags jhgvbhnjkm.
tldr thank you for your kindness and i am really hoping my next exam will feature me either Unconscious or Off My Ass On Laughing Gas Or Something. if theres some chance i HAVE to keep my equipment rather than getting surgery i may genuinely look into therapies just for my own convenience but beyond that i just really ... really do not want any items up in there.
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daddyd0nt · 5 months ago
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You can call me a pedophile all you want but its not going to make me one lol the biggest age gap I was ever in a hookup with as theolder person was 2 years (and I thought it was 1, he lied and said he was older) just because I write horror about horrifying things doesnt mean Im sexually aroused by them, or that any of my work that contains abuse of minors is to be eroticized in any way. Sometimes, when you are writing horror, you write about horrific things. It is how I work out the abuse went through as a child, actually. It feels like getting to tell about my abuse without having to actually tell, my therapist read my work and said it is a healthy way to deal with my history of sexual trauma and Im pretty sure she knows more than some pearl-clutcher on the internet. If I was a pedophile or gave any signs of being one in the 12 years I worked with her she wouldn't have signed off for me to work in a daycare.
And I can hold a job? I just left my last one because I was approved for disability in the middle of it and was making too much and I was going to lose my health insurance and they couldn't keep part time staff, I was explicitly told I was welcome back if my health care situation changed and they were heartbroken to lose me because I was one of their best employees. And my degree is in writing, writing IS my job at the moment, Im working in my field because i have the rare freedom to since being approved for disability. Ive actually never been fired from a job, I quit one that was abusive but any other on-the-books job I had ended because the store literally closed or the season ended.
And you obviously need my validation or you wouldn't have mentioned your artwork being displayed in some "prestigious" gallery in a state where you need a fork and knife to eat a pizza lmfao.
Im also not a junkie Ive just been on my (prescribed, not abused) meds long enough that I have a chemical dependance on them the only drug I take that isn't prescribed to me is weed which will soon also be part of my prescription because my therapist put through to have me put on medical so I really don't consider myself a junkie at all. Im sober from alcohol (5 years no relapses) and the only illegal drugs I do VERY RARELY are X, Coke, and K (maybe once or twice a year, like sometimes ill be offered a sniff of coke at a wedding or like over the summer we get a beach house and one of the days we do E but nothing habitual). I really liked acid in college but grew out of it. I didn't even have to put effort into giving up a pack a day cigarette habit I literally stopped smoking to spite an ex roommate who was trying to quit but couldn't.
And for the record myself and my home are clean, I showered right before bed last night and put on fresh clothing, and my house is small so it is a little cluttered and we have some boxes we never really moved all the way in but its not like we have bugs or rotten food or anything nasty like that, I literally have a disability that makes organization difficult but my surroundings are not unhygienic and Im going to be getting an aide from the state to help keep my house in order and take me grocery shopping so i can do it while my man is at work sorry that my life is better than yours and Im making the best of my situation I guess lmfao but I'm literally disabled I have level 2 autism (only thing that keeps me from being level 3 is that I am verbal) in addition to a whole alphabet of comorbid conditions that impair my communication and make organization hard but Im taking actual steps to become as independent as possible. But Im always going to be offputting, im always going to be awkward, Im always going to have an interest in horror because it is me Special interest, if that bothers you stop following me. Like is that what this boils down to, picking on the retarded kid? Is your self esteem that low?
You have such a boner for me. I read your posts and I laugh at you. You are so assmad that my life is not the sad spiral you wish it was. You're just jealous, Lisa... because I got better... because I was released... because I have a chance... at a life
TROPES IN “little heck”
Forbidden flirtations
Competition/Jealousy
Scary protective older brother
Cheating
Povertycore
Uncertain Paternity
Stockholm Syndrome
Enemies to lovers
Blinded by revenge
Unrequited love
Amnesia
Dark secret
Emotional scars
Redemption through suffering
Dude in distress
Heavy whump
Woobie Antagonist
Southern gothic
Liminal spaces
Coming of age
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slusheeduck · 2 years ago
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Count Only The Happy Hours
PART I: [I][II][III][IV][V][VI][VII]
PART II:
I.
And so the exploits of Indoril Nerevar Mora, Hortator of the Great Houses and leader of the Resdayn reclamation, were known across the wide swathe of Chimer territory. From the Grazelands to the Bitter Coast, his forces were swiftly retaking the land of their birthright. 
Today, they were truly blessed. For from the Mourning Hold, a Queen was granting…
“Voryn is going to have conniption if you call her that.”
Vivec turned around with a long sigh, shooting a flat look at the mer behind him. “And what am I supposed to say? The Grandmaster of House Indoril?”
“Well, that is her title, so…yes.”
“There’s no poetry in any of you House mer,” Vivec lamented, tossing his head back. “I despair of any of you taking over my role if I should ever fall; the triumph of the Chimer will be relegated to field notes.”
He returned to his work, sighing as he re-read the last few pages. The one thing no one ever mentioned in epics was just how long revolutions took. You hear about the grand battles, of course–soaring triumphs and bitter losses and strategies that would make Boethiah proud. But there was also so much time in-between, of just…waiting. Of course, it couldn’t all be burning down Hofstaag in the three years that had followed their declaration of war, but still…a bit more drama wouldn’t hurt.
That said, it wasn’t as though nothing had happened in the past three years. Nerevar’s work in bringing the mer of Hofstaag to Ald’ruhn had gotten the attention of the Great Houses, and he’d succeeded in joining all six together under the banner of Resdayn as Hortator. The Dwemer were staunch allies now, fully working alongside them now that they’d proven their aptitude and fire; Dumac was essentially a full member of their party–making two mer in their numbers who knew how to make sense of metal nonsense.
Sil had remained with them, shedding his last vestiges of childhood by working to free Resdayn. He’d grown a bit in maturity and quite a lot in stature–the running joke among the council was that you could tell how many days had passed based on how many inches Seht had grown. He wasn’t quite of age, not yet, but he still stood taller than Nerevar and was quickly catching up to Voryn, which meant he towered over Vivec–from the latter, he patiently endured laments over how cruel fate was, to render a little brother so very tall. But more impressively, Sil’s placidity had only grown deeper with time, and aside from his work with his metal creatures, he was already proving himself invaluable when it came to offering his counsel. Neht called it wisdom, Seht called it logic, and Vehk called it boring…but, tragically, often efficient.
As for himself, Vivec had thrived since gaining the title of (junior) counselor. The vindication hadn’t worn off in all three years since he’d been appointed the title, and if he was smug when his ideas worked, well…he was only a mer, after all. But he’d grown, too, if not as obviously as Sil; a title came with responsibility, and a title in times like these came heavy with the expectations–and, more often than not, the well-being–of the mer who couldn’t fight for themselves. His passion still remained, but it was tempered: a guiding light, now, rather than a blaze of fury and joy. 
And yet, despite their changes, some things were hardly different than they were when Sil had first been brought to Vivec’s side. Their quarters were more impressive than a merchant’s caravan–several cities had been claimed for the Chimer, and their current headquarters was in a very impressive (and very safe) outpost out near the Stoneforest. But they still had to travel under pretense, had to play things safe when in Nordic territory. And, in less dangerous times, Sil would still come and sit with Vehk as he wrote, often tinkering with some clockwork mechanism and offering his (unhelpful) commentary when Vivec read his work aloud.
Vivec returned to said work, spreading the pages in front of him and sighing. Perhaps it was less than respectful. The Grandmaster had been one of their staunchest allies, even when she hadn’t been able to offer more than bending her father’s ear. She’d promised to join them the year before, but that plan had been waylaid by the death of her father, leaving her the head of House Indoril when she was just barely more than a child. A romantic image, a Girl-Queen taking charge in the midst of a revolution and revitalizing the efforts of her House from a distance, but pretty words didn’t mean much if they offended the party you were trying to woo–Vivec had learned this himself many times, in less political situations.
“Do you think she’ll be like Voryn?” Sil asked.
“Why on Nirn would she be anything like Voryn?”
Sil looked up from his work, magnifying lenses still on–one silvery eye was double its usual size, while the other was focused over and over through a series of increasingly small attachments, leaving just a dark pupil massive and visible. “She’s a Grandmaster. He’s a High Councilor, but I’d assumed they’d all be like him.” He shrugged. “But I’ll be the first to admit my data is limited.”
“You’re a House mer, Sil.”
“A small house, and I only ever saw our Grandmaster in passing.”
Vivec looked over Sil for a moment, thinking. “Would…you be Grandmaster now? Of House Sotha?”
Sil shrugged again, the action more guarded this time, and he took off his lenses. “I suppose, by default–though I might be too young. But that hardly matters when it’s just me.” He let out a breath as he sat back. “Voryn’s offered to bring me into House Dagoth–a full member of the house, without the usual…requirements that switching would need.”
Vivec’s eyebrows rose. “Voryn? Being charitable? Are you sure you heard him right, Seht?” 
Sil gave a long sigh. “Considering how many times he’s offered, yes.”
“Will you take him up on it?” Sil shook his head, and Vivec followed with, “Why not? It’s a respectable house, and for all the riffing I do on Voryn, there are worse mer to serve as a sponsor.”
Sil didn’t answer. Replies, Vivec had learned, were an option for him, not a requirement. It’d been frustrating three years ago, but since then, Vivec had learned to read him. Some questions were too painful, others too irrelevant, and–when Seht did have a response–the answers were always worth the wait. So, as the silence drew on, Vehk returned to his work, expecting Sil to do the same. 
“If I do, House Sotha is truly gone.”
The words were very quiet, but Vivec caught them. He stayed still a moment, letting the weight of them settle before he turned to look back at Seht. His eyes were fixed on the gears on his lap, expression placid. But the way his shoulders drew up slightly was a reminder that he was still very, terribly young.
“Then don’t,” Vivec said, with a casual shrug to hide the difficult balancing act of lightening the room and giving serious brotherly guidance. “Keep your House alive. One day, there may be more who join, by choice or by your own blood. I personally can’t imagine a better son of House Sotha serving as its legacy.” He turned back to his work. “Besides, your name has such nice consonance to it. Sotha Sil. When I write of your great works as the Clockwork Lord of Resdayn, I can’t go calling you Dagoth Sil Sotha. The cadence is horrific.”
Vehk didn’t glance back, but he knew Seht well enough to practically feel the eyeroll he was receiving, along with the puff of breath that passed as a laugh. He continued to write as Sil’s fiddling resumed, the quiet clink of metal serving as familiar background noise for a time, but his pen stopped as he realized the room had gone silent.
“If…you wanted to join, Vivec, I wouldn’t make you undertake the tasks that normally go into joining a house. Especially since a Grandmaster will be visiting soon.” Sil’s voice was very quiet, with an unusual air of hesitancy in it. As Vehk turned, he caught another shrug. “We could be brothers in a slightly more official sense, even if it’s not blood.”
A swell of emotion rose in Vehk’s chest at that, and he was very close to babbling out that yes, he was so honored, he would do everything in his power to ensure the name of House Sotha lived forever through their works. Three years ago, he might have done it. But he was older now, and wiser, and very aware of the type of mer he was.
He got up from his seat, going down to sit on his heels across from Seht. He leaned forward, setting his hands on either side of the younger mer’s thin face. “I have never been so honored,” he whispered. “And if I were to wear the colors of any house, House Sotha would be the ones I chose. But I can’t.” Sil didn’t ask why–he seemed to accept this answer, actually–but Vehk still felt it necessary to explain himself. “You and I, everyone who stands with Nerevar, we each have roles to play. If you and Voryn are the Houses, if Alandro is the divinely gifted, if Nerevar is the outlander, then it falls to me to be the houseless mer, the netchimen in the silt and the nomads in the ashlands. If I align myself with any house, become…Sotha Vivec, or Indoril Vivec, or Dagoth Vivec, then we lose a crucial piece of the Chimer population.” He grimaced. “Does that make sense, Seht?”
“Yes, but you used too many words to say it.” Sil’s lips were ever so slightly turned up. “Which makes you a terrible fit for House Sotha, truthfully, so I must rescind my offer. I’m so sorry, Vehk.”
Vivec blinked, and his face split into a grin as he stood up, giving Sil’s head a good-natured push. 
“I’m heartbroken, Grandmaster Sil. I hope you know I’ll be stewing in my grief through the entirety of Grandmaster Almalexia’s visit.”
~
The young qu…Grandmaster had agreed to meet them at Ald’ruhn; it was fitting, given how that was where the formal, non-city-burning declaration of war had been issued. She’d be coming with reinforcements–the Mourning Hold was off on the mainland of Tamriel, a veritable metropolis compared to the migratory, rural nature of Vvardenfell, which meant access to a navy, trained foot soldiers, and other much needed support for a war. While she’d sent plenty of those once she received her title, this was the first time she would risk accompanying them to meet the Hortator, along with Alandro, Voryn, Vivec, and Sil.
Sil hadn’t been the only one to wonder over her, and as Nerevar and his council waited for her arrival, the discussion naturally turned to each of their expectations. 
“She’s hardly going to be older than Sil,” Nerevar said quietly to Alandro, looking concerned. 
“And Sil manages just fine. She’s not going to be a child, Neht,” Alandro assured. 
“And she’s likely going to be insufferable,” Voryn added under his breath. 
That piqued Vivec’s interest. “Why would you think that?”
Voryn sighed, flicking a strand of dark hair over his shoulder as he crossed his arms. “I’ll admit that I never personally met the former Grandmaster of House Indoril, but as a house–you don’t count, Nerevar, you joined–they’re…” He made a face. “Self-righteous. They think their ‘piety’ renders them untouchable.” He huffed. “No doubt she’ll put your Azura worship to shame,” he added to Nerevar. 
“Is that really such a problem?” Vehk asked. “I think we could use all the good graces we can get from the Three.” 
Voryn’s sour face didn’t lighten. “Overall? No, hence why I’m here. But in the past, House Dagoth and House Indoril have not…seen eye to eye. I’ll be polite, but I hope you don’t expect the Grandmaster and I to be chummy.”
Alandro sighed. “Oblivion, you House mer make things difficult,” he said dryly, star-bright eyes rolling. “You’re acting like she’s the newest member of the council.” He waved a hand, crisp and dismissive. “Here’s what will probably happen: she’s the type that’s grown up on adventure stories. So of course she ate up all the romantic drivel Vehk sent out…”
“It’s not drivel!”
“...and fancied herself some sort of noble hero–I mean, we all saw the letters she’s sent over the years. But once she gets out here, once she sees that it’s all real and messy and not at all like what Vivec’s written, she’ll realize that she’s too soft for this sort of thing and make her way out. We just have to keep her alive until she reaches that point.”
Nerevar shifted in place, frowning. He didn’t look a bit convinced. “I don’t think she’ll be too soft,” he said quietly. “There’s always been fire in her letters.” He smiled a bit. “I’ve always admired it, really. She’s no Vehk, but I’ve always had the sense she’s put her heart into her words.”
“Well, then maybe Vehk can stay behind and write some poetry with her,” Alandro drawled. “I’d be glad to keep her out of our hair altogether; the Nords have been quiet for far too long, and I’d rather focus on what their next move is than worry about babysitting.” 
“Hortator!” The group’s attention was diverted from their talk as a young mer came rushing over, breathless and excited. As Nerevar approached, she pointed behind her. “Grandmaster Almalexia’s just outside the city! She’s brought reinforcements!”
Nerevar’s eyebrows rose, and he smiled. “Well, maybe you don’t need to worry about those Nords after all, Alandro.” He looked back to the scout. “Lead the way, then, sera. Let’s go greet our visitor.”
The five made their way out of the city gates, Nerevar naturally taking the lead. They’d hardly taken three steps out from the gates when they came to a stop, surprise falling over them. Hundreds of mer, outfitted for war, stood at attention outside, as if they were awaiting orders. They’d expected reinforcements; they had not expected an entire army.
A couple stepped forward from the battalion standing at the ready–a fully armored mer, with a grotesque, snake-like helm looking over the group of them, and a woman in traveling clothes far too sumptuous to be anything but nobility. One of the armored mer beckoned the group forward. Nerevar and Alandro went up without hesitation; Voryn, Vivec, and Sil lagged back for a moment.
“So, there’s our generous patron,” Vivec murmured. “I was expecting more pageantry.”
“House Indoril is tragically cut and dry,” Voryn muttered. “But, at least, this grandmaster follows through on her promises. I’ll give her that much; there’s enough mer here to take Grahavil.” He sighed. “We’d best go up and offer our own support. Sil, stand up straight.”
The young mer had been silent all the while, giving no indication as to what he thought of their visitor. No doubt he had been “gathering data,” to use a phrase of his–or, equally likely, he wanted the fuss to be over to return to his work. But he did straighten his back, only to compensate for his full height by bending his knees. Vivec gave him a smile.
“It might be nice, having someone around your age here,” he said quietly as they walked forward. “Maybe you’ll find a friend in our visiting queen.” He raised his eyebrows as Sil didn’t so much as give him a withering glance in reply, instead frowning slightly as he looked over the group ahead. “You’ve been quiet, even for you. Something on your mind, Seht?”
Sil glanced down at him, then gave a quick little sigh. “I’ve been trying to figure out why I’m even here,” he whispered back. “Neht only brings me along for talks with the Dwemer.” His frown deepened. “When he told me to come this morning, I initially thought he’d have me explain the animunculi, but he said to leave everything at the fort.”
Vivec furrowed his brow, then shrugged. “Well, perhaps he had the same thought as me. You both have endured quite a lot at a young age. Maybe she’ll trust you more. Or he wants to brag about Resdayn’s mechanical prodigy, and he knew you’d scowl and hide if he said as much.” Vehk smiled as said scowl spread across Sil’s face. “Ah ah, we have company. Put on your best House mer face.”
They joined the others as Nerevar was in the middle of introductions. “...and my shield-companion, Alandro Sul…”
“The Immortal Son of Azura, yes,” the woman said brightly, nodding. Her hair, a burnished gold, had been tied back, but her curls still bounced from the enthusiasm of her movement. “Is it true you felled an entire company of Nords by yourself?”
Alandro sighed. “It’s an exaggeration, courtesy of our local propaganda crafter.” He gave a look over to Vivec, but smiled as he looked back to their visitors. But I can tell you the strategy that led to us beating an army twice our size.”
“I’d certainly like to hear that,” the armored mer beside her said–her voice wasn’t quite as enthusiastic, but her interest was clearly genuine. “I’ve tried to figure out how you managed that for months now.”
“Ah, but introductions first,” the first woman said, giving the armored mer a knowing look. She smiled as she caught sight of Vivec and Sil. “So one of you must be the mer who’s written such incredible accounts.”
Nerevar laughed. “That would be Vivec, our mer of many talents. His work on the battlefield is just as impressive as his work on the page.”
Vehk, to his credit, only puffed up a little at the blatant praise. “Both are necessary,” he said. “In our case, without the sword, there’s nothing for the pen to note.” 
The helm of the armored mer tilted slightly as he spoke; now that they were closer, he could see deep gold eyes behind the mask. As he met her gaze, it felt as though she managed to bore right into him–there was a connection, certainly, though he wasn’t sure whether he was being regarded as an ally or a threat. All the same, he sent her a smile; hopefully, that’d nudge him toward being the former. 
“So then this is…” The blonde mer pointed at Seht, who merely stayed silent. He had, at least, spent the past three years mastering the art of hiding his discomfort behind a mask of quiet thoughtfulness.
“This,” Nerevar said, picking up the lead the younger mer was silently refusing to as he clapped Seht’s thin shoulder, “is Sotha Sil. My most trusted advisor on all things mechanical.”
Sil’s thoughtful mask broke, and he looked to Neht in shock. “Advisor?” he whispered.
“Of course, kena,” Neht murmured back with a smile. “You’re already doing all the work, you may as well have the title for it.”
“Sotha Sil? As in…Ald Sotha?” Their attention was drawn back to the blonde mer as she looked over him sympathetically. “My deepest condolences on your House, serjo. I couldn’t imagine.”
Promptly, Seht was once again hidden away behind his placidity. “It is appreciated, Grandmaster.”
The blonde mer blinked several times, and she covered her mouth. “Oh! Oh, I’m not…” She looked to the armored mer. “Oh, by the Three, Alma, I didn’t introduce you.”
“I was waiting to see how long it’d take.” By contrast to the intensity of her look, the armored mer’s voice was teasing and warm, and she finally pulled off her helm. Her copper hair was bound back tightly, and her golden eyes were no less intense now than they were behind the snaked face–this one was angular and regal, though Vivec didn’t miss the subtle softness that gave away the recent nature of her adulthood. Regardless, the beauty of her face was only enhanced by her certainty and confidence.
If there ever was someone to risk calling a queen, clearly it was her.
“I am Grandmaster Indoril Almalexia,” she said, chin raised as she looked back to Nerevar. “And I’ve come to aid in fight to free Resdayn from the Nords.”
“And we appreciate your offer gre–” Neht was cut off by a flash in Almalexia’s golden eyes.
“It’s not an offer, Hortator. It is a statement,” she said. She looked over the five of them for a moment, a subtle curve to her lips. “And since our introductions are out of the way, I’d like to talk strategy once my troops have set up camp. Hlareni, my chamberlain–” She motioned to the blonde mer. “–will send word once everyone’s settled, and I would like to hear what your next move is. So we should reconvene in…oh, I’d say two hours?”
Nerevar blinked. He looked to Voryn, who scowled, then to Alandro, who shrugged. He then gave Almalexia a warm smile as he clasped a hand over his heart, kneeling his head. 
“We look forward to it. And if you need anything at all, serjo, we’re always ready to help one of our staunchest supporters.”
“And we’re more than honored by your hosting us,” Hlareni added, giving a look to Almalexia–Vivec knew it all too well; it was the same silent “be friendly” he often shot Sil’s way. “We’ve brought tokens of our appreciation of your efforts, Hortator, which we’ll give when we reconvene.” She dipped her head, then followed Almalexia as she turned on her heel, the Grandmaster already shouting orders at the troops behind them.
As they drew away, Voryn immediately slid up to Nerevar. “How long are we indulging this?” he hissed. “If she’s like this when she’s just arrived, we cannot have her stay long enough for our next strike. It’ll be a disaster.”
Alandro crossed his arms, looking thoughtful. “Her manner’s a bit clunky, but she’s young. I bet she’s trying to impress us–but there’s certainly plenty to work with. And her armor was more practical than I was expecting, so she has that going for her.”
“That mask is practical?” Voryn asked dryly, which earned an equally dry look from Alandro. 
“Are you suddenly expecting House mer to not be flamboyant, Devil of Dagoth?” He shook his head, then looked to Nerevar. “What do you think, Neht? Ultimately, you have final say.”
Nerevar’s expression was far-off through the small spat, and he looked as though he’d been woken from a dream as Alandro addressed him. He looked between them, then glanced over to the troops, no doubt following their Grandmaster to set up camp. A slow smile spread across his face.
“I like her spirit,” he said. “I think she’ll be a boon to us.”
“I do, too,” Vivec chimed in. “We could do with a charismatic House Mer in our numbers. And, no offense to you, Voryn, but just seeing her now is proof enough that she beats you there.”
A glint in Voryn’s dark eyes threatened Vivec, but before any barbs could escape his mouth, he looked over to Nerevar. The Hortator’s face was bright with possibility–or, perhaps, just the joy of having new people around. Likely both. Voryn sighed and crossed his arms.
“Well. We’d best prepare for strategizing.” He stepped over to Alandro, saying something quietly to him. Vivec was too far to hear, but he got the impression it was something along the lines of a venomous “Good luck.”
Nerevar was none the wiser to it, clapping his hands together. “I am excited for some new perspective,” he said, heading back toward their own camp. “I bet Lady Almalexia…”
“Grandmaster,” Voryn corrected.
“...yes, Grandmaster Almalexia is teeming with ideas, if her past letter are anything to go by.” He flashed a grin. “I’m actually excited to discuss them in person after hearing from her for so long.”
“And if they’re ridiculous?” Voryn asked.
“Then what an opportunity for us to teach her and make an ally for life.”
Vivec smiled at the unbridled optimism, and he glanced back over his shoulder as he followed the others back to their camp. From here, he could just catch a glimpse of copper hair gleaming in the sun. Obviously, he couldn’t say what sort of ally Almalexia would prove to be, but there were stories upon stories in her face alone.
And he did so love to chase stories.
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fwkei · 3 years ago
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Draken x fem!reader (mainly fluff slight angst)
Finally got my first request yall 🥳 I couldn’t strictly follow the request like i wanted to but i hope thats alright, the gist is still there. anyways thank you sm for it and i hope you enjoy 
TW/CW: Mentions of sex, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sex work
WC: 7k (omg the most ive ever written🙆🏻‍♀️)
Note: I changed my writing style a bit for this request so i hope yall don’t mind! and again i dont read my stuff over so my apologies if theres any mistakes lmao
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You sat on the street, overheating as you watched the ‘heat waves’ coming off the ground. You held your hair up with one of your hands since you had nothing to tie it with, while the other held a lukewarm water bottle. You sighed, you felt so anxious and frustrated.
What now?  
You thought letting your mouth part due to your heavy breathing 
You took things too fast. It had been about 3 weeks since you left your parents ‘home’ and why did you leave? Well there were a number of reasons that are a bit too much to list, but all that matters now is that you’re completely and utterly on your own. 
You only managed to scavenge small jobs here and there to get some money to buy some basic necessities but nothing more. 
“Sorry Y/n, my niece is coming down to Tokyo and I told her she could have a job here and stay at the studio above...I’m gonna have to let go. I’m sorry.” said your boss to you only a couple hours ago, with pity filled eyes 
“...No it’s fine really! I understand.Thank you for taking me in while you could.” you said bowing your head at the man, biting your inner cheek trying to keep a level head 
“I’m happy you understand. You can leave your apron and hat on the cashier. On your way out.” he said patting your shoulder as you slowly brought your head up 
“Right..” you said taking off your apron and hat as you walked slowly to the cashier, placing it down 
You brought your hands to your temples out of stress, trying to figure out what you could do now. You only had very little money, and there was a heat wave striking Japan this week. At least your boss allowed you to live and pay rent in the small studio right above his store, which had an AC, but now that was for his niece.  
This had been the first time in a while where you had no idea what to do. You had always been the type of person to be able to take care of yourself and your problems..on your own. All your life since you can remember, you always had to be the one to take care of others, not that you mind or minded...but you were only so young. You never really had a childhood, at least not that you can remember. You do remember cleaning up after your parents who lost all will just to even... parent. You remember taking jobs as a babysitter at a really young age in your apartment complex to make some money.. You remember being the reliable older kid of your school and complex, where kids would come to you asking for help with things like homework all the way to buying something for them to eat because they were hungry. Not once did you ever say no, because you really did want to be there for those kids who’s parents didn’t give them the care they needed. But it just became too much.. You ended up spending all of your saved up money on them, just so they could have something to play with or something to eat. 
Before you even realized it, you were in your last year of high school, with no money saved over, no scholarships, no one to rely on but yourself. Not even a friend. Was it really the right thing to do? Use all your money that you worked so hard for to help kids he lived next door? Or just plain stupid? You knew you couldn't support them forever...but you tried so hard to. All you wanted was to give them a childhood they never had, and someone to look up too. But now you left them. All because you were frustrated. You felt so unbearably guilty. All the work you put into your studies to get at least some type of scholarship just went to waste because you couldn't handle your life anymore. You were being so so so stupid. 
Before you even knew it, the sun was going down, and you grew even more tired and sleepy. You signed, taking a jacket out of your bag and placing it on the ground so you could rest your head on it. You brought your hands to cushion your cheek as your eyes started to close. The air finally got a little cooler making it easier to breathe and well...do anything. 
As you were falling asleep you could hear chatter and laughing, and finally a tap on your shoulder waking you up. You cringed your eyes before opening them up more to see 2 women. One had blonde hair and the other had pinkish hair. They looked older than you, maybe in their 20’s. One held a bag and the other held a bottle of wine with two glasses, they bent down so their heads could be closer to yours. After examining you for a bit they turned to each other and smiled happily before turning back their gaze to your confused face. 
“Hey?” you said sitting up more, a little startled by the intimate contact they were giving you 
“Hey there, say...what’s a pretty girl like you sleeping on the street for?” asked the girl with pinkish hair that was tied into pigtails 
“I uh..don’t have a place right now so..” you said scratching your head 
“Really? Hmmm.” said he one with blonde hair 
“How old are you? And what’s your name? I think we can help you out! Woman to woman!” said the pink haired girl smiling sweetly making you feel fuzzy at their niceness 
“18, and it’s Y/n.” you said smiling nervously 
“Nice to meet you Y/n, I’m Remi, this is Rema, my twin sister.” said the pink haired girl pointing to the blonde as she waved sweetly 
“Hi, it’s nice to meet you too..!” you said bringing your hands to your thighs smiling 
“So did you just turn 18?” asked Rema 
“Sorta, 2 months ago, why?” you asked 
“Oh good!” they both said 
“Well, it’s your choice really. One of the girls left today, and the boss sent us to scout another girl to take her place, buttt we just went to buy food with no intentions of finding someone but luckily we just found you! It’s perfect!” said Remi 
“Oh? What work?” you asked getting excited 
“Oh silly, we live in a brothel! It’s really not all that bad you know, great pay and rooms...so what do you think?” asked Rema 
“A brothel..” you said under your breath 
Your mind was in a serious state of concentration. 
It can’t be all that bad, right? You just have to please people and go on with your day so… that’s what i've been doing my whole life… plus… there's a bunch of women in those things right? I probably won't get too much attention from customers if there's sweethearts like Remi and Rema walking around...so...just for the time being… I think it could really work out in my favor. 
You thought to yourself 
You brought your head up, giving the girls a closed eyes smile before shaking your head ‘yes’ making them jump in excitement. 
“Oh good!” yelled Remi grabbing your hands 
“I’m so excited! We haven't had a new girl in years! How do you think Ken will react?” asked Rema smiling as you 3 all started to walk 
“Ken?” you asked furrowing your eyebrows at the familiar name 
“Oh right, We’ll have to introduce you to him and everyone else tomorrow. He’s the bosses foster kid..I think you two are actually the same age.” said Rema bringing her pointer finger to her chin 
“Mhm mhm! Oh and since you're new, tomorrow I will take your pictures for the board, you can borrow one of my sets till you can afford to buy one for yourself, how does that sound Y/n?” asked Remi smiling and holding your hand 
“It sounds..great! Thank you so much.” you said bowing your head slightly 
“No worries! Hopefully the boss will take you in.” said Remi patting your head 
“Yeah..” you said as you 3 continued to walk to the brothel 
You couldn't seem to get your mind off of that familiar name..Ken? You swore you knew someone named that. It definitely wasn't a popular name so it’s not like you knew it from some type of T.V program.. After thinking hard your whole way to your new home you couldn't seem to remember them. The person named Ken. And so you decided to brush it off for the time being. 
The brothel was pretty big, and consisted of 12 girls, not including yourself. It was really late so everyone was asleep. Remi and Rema showed you to your room which was much more spacious than your room at home. They told you that you were allowed to decorate it and style it however you wanted. But they told you it was important to know that this was the room where business would be done, and not to leave important things around since some of the men came into brothels for the sole purpose of stealing. Remi even told you a story about how one of her clients tried to steal one of her panites, but then the boy named Ken stopped him by knocking him out with one punch to the stomach.   
“He sounds strong-” you laughed as they gave you a small tour 
“He sure is! Like the bodyguard of this place! He’s a sweetheart!” said Remi smiling 
“I’m sure..!” you smiled 
“Alright that’s about it, you should shower now and get ready for tomorrow. The boss will probably wanna take a look at you before seeing if he wants you. But I'm sure he will! You're pretty so it’ll go smoothly!” said Remi handing you her shower stuff for you to use for tonight and a set 
“Got it, and again...thank you so much. I really appreciate it.” you said again 
“Of course! Remember..we’re neighbors so feel free to knock whenever you need something..Also I can give you some tips before your first client so you know what to do.” she said smiling 
“Right, goodnight then!..” you said feeling your face get hot at how she so easily talked about sex. 
After that, you did exactly as she said, you showered. You thoroughly washed your body, face, and hair. Getting out you looked down at the set Remi gave you. It was just a black bra and matching panties with a silk cover up which made you feel better knowing you could cover up with that.  
You rubbed your mouth as you started to rethink your decision. I mean...you respected sex workers..but was this life what you were willing to settle for? Aimlessly waiting around for some random horny man to choose you and do things with you just for you to get only 40% of the payment? Was this all really worth it? Leaving home to avoid your problems...to end up here? You were grateful, yes, Remi and Rema were so sweet and open with you. You could only hope that the others were just as nice. You really wanted things to go well, and that can only start with some good rest. 
You woke up to a knock on your door, to see Remi and Rema walking in with a smile 
“Morninggg!” they sang as you quickly got out of bed 
“Hi!” you said frantically 
“No need to rush! Usually men start coming in at 10, but since you don't work here officially yet you got to sleep in a bit! But the boss called for you, you should go to the set up room down the hall to get ready, remember it?” asked Rema 
“Yeah I do. Thank you for waking me-!” you said smiling and grabbing your stuff and shoes 
“Course, good luck Y/n!” they said as you quickly walked out of your room to get ready 
As you walked in, there were a few other girls getting ready. You smiled and introduced yourself to them, and them to you. They were all so nice and pretty. It made you feel a little bit better about being here, and less nervous since they complimented your looks. You got ready in about 10 minutes, letting one of the other girls help you out with your hair and stuff like that. You gave yourself one last look in the mirror before stepping out and waving to the girls ‘bye.’ 
You nervously walked to the boss's door. You took a deep breath before knocking. You heard a muffled ‘come in!’ so you walked in smiling while holding your covering close. You gave a nervous closed eyes smile before seeing his office was simple, just a desk with a bunch of papers and a chair on the other side. 
“Y/n, correct?” he asked placing down his paper and taking off his glasses to look at you
“Yes.” you said smiling 
“Pleasure-” he said leaning over the desk to shake your hand 
“Likewise.” you said smiling, shaking his hand firmly before sitting down
“Well, I’m sure Remi and Rema told you just about everything you need to know, I take 60% of your earrings, I use that stuff to pay for rent and bills for you girls and my kid… which usually takes up about 30% of that 60%, meaning you make a profit of 40, while I make only a profit of 30 per girl.” he said 
“Yeah, I was told.” you said smiling nervously fiddling with your hands
“Good good, now that that's over with..” he said getting up ad signing 
“I’m just gonna take a look at you, no need to be nervous I’m not gonna touch you or anything, so please don’t feel worried.” he said smiling 
“Right!” you said getting up 
“Alright just do a quick 360 with arms up.” he said smiling 
“Okay.” you said doing as he said 
He looked you up and down but not in a lustful way at all, it was more of like a ‘just seeing how you’ll hold up’ kinda look, almost like he was a bit worried for you. 
“Thank you-” he said sitting back down as you did the same feeling nervous
“I was also told you’re 18? Right?” he asked looking down at his papers 
“Yeah that's right.” you said 
“Well I don't usually have this talk with the other woman because they're older. I know the age of consent in Japan is 16 and blah blah, but you’re still pretty young, are you sure you wanna work like this?” he asked looked into your eyes 
“...Not entirely but it’s the best I can do right now.” you said with a determined face
“I see- we’ll then welcome, and just remember you can leave whenever you want, but give a 2 weeks notice. When Remi is done, ask her to take your picture.” he said 
“Understood, thank you!” you said said smiling and leaving   
You walked out of the room, closing the door carefully signing in relieve 
That went pretty well.
You thought 
You started to walk down the hall so that you could ask Remi to take your picture. But when you put your ear to the door, you heard lewd noises letting you know she wasn’t done just yet. It was already 5, and the brothel closes at 10. You didn’t really know what to do, so you walked over to the kitchen, sitting down at one of the stools waiting for Remi and or Rema to finish up with their work. You tapped the pen that was on the table and started to look around the kitchen. You remembered Remi told you there were snacks in the cabinets, so you got up and started to open and close them one by one to find something to eat. You finally found a cabinet filled instant ramen, you grabbed one and started to pour water into it, popping it into the microwave that was on the counter top. You stood in front of it waiting, playing with the loose strings of you covering when suddenly you heard the door open. 
“I’m home.” said the tall boy with dark hair tied back to reveal a dragon tattoo on the side of his head 
Is this Ken? 
You thought as the microwave beeped, making his eyes turn to you
You quickly shot your eyes to the microwave, hoping he didn’t notice your stare. He looked so familiar it was almost irritating how you couldn’t remember him. You took the hot cup out of the microwave, placing it down on the counter top, ignoring his presence as he walked over, placing down the plastic bag in his hand, noticing your frustrated face trying to figure out where the utensils are. 
“Left of the sink are where they are.” he said sitting down on the stool across from you after looking at your face a bit 
“Thank you.” you said smiling nervously turning around to grab a pair of chopsticks 
“Are you new here?” he asked taking out a styrofoam box from the plastic bag, opening it to reveal a hot meal of meat and rice and vegetables 
“Yeah..I was supposed to start today but I don’t have my pictures taken yet.” you said smiling turning back to mix your noodles 
“Could you grab me a pair too?” he asked realizing he forgot to take a pair of chopsticks from the restaurant 
“Sure-” you said turning back quickly to grab some for him, placing it in his hands as he gave you a soft smile making your eyes widen slightly. 
“You look familiar..” you both said at the same time making both your eyebrows raise in shock then turn into a slight scoff from the both of you 
“Glad we’re on the same page then.” he said taking a bite of his food as you did the same still standing 
“You know you can sit down, don’t feel nervous.” he said looking up you slightly 
“..yeah.” you said smiling, walking around and sitting next to him. 
“So when’d you come?” he asked turning his head slightly to see your mouth filled with noodles making him smile a bit 
“..I came by last night, really late with Remi and Rema.” you said after finishing your bite
“I see...I feel like I remember you from somewhere, can’t pinpoint it though.” he said looking back down at his food 
“Same here, and you must be Ken though, right? When I first heard your name I swore the same thing but I just can’t remember..” you said before sipping some of the broth of your soup
“Yeah, but you can call me Draken and your name?” he asked getting up to grab a napkin from across the table 
“Draken...sure! Oh right, my bad. It’s Y/n. Nice to meet you-” you said smiling holding your hand out for him to shake
He only completely shot up to look into your eyes with his wide ones. You gave him a confused look as you watched him get knocked out of his thoughts, bring his hand up to shake your hand before clearing his throat and walking back over to sit. Maybe you struck a nerve? Maybe had the same name as someone who hurt him in the past? You really didn’t know but it made you feel interested. He looked like he just had his life flash before his eyes or something. 
“Are you okay?” you asked 
“Uh yeah, I’m fine. My head just hurts a bit.” he said looking as if he was deep in thought 
“Oh? I have some tylenol in my room.. You want one? Or I can make you a cold drink, you’re probably dehydrated?” you asked smiling a bit 
Draken turned his head to look at you, his mouth was parted, and he just looked so..anxious? You couldn’t even tell, almost like congested because he wanted to say something. 
Draken felt his heartbeat quicken when he heard your name. As soon as you said it, a random memory that was buried deep in the back of his mind hit him as he quickly re-lived it. But could it really be you? The Y/n he knew from so so so long ago? Around 10 years ago? There could be no way, he remembers the girl moving to a different city..the chances were so low that it could really be you already. 
But the second you said those words.. Those words of offering to make something for him, or give him something, despite you thinking you only just met him...Made him know that it was really the Y/n he met when he was only a little boy...but how the hell did you turn up here? In a place and part of town like this? He was so confused and just wanted to ask you...but you still didn’t remember him. 
“..No I’m alright, thanks..can I ask you somethin-” said Draken before being interrupted 
“Y/n!! Come on, let's take your pictures!” yelled Remi coming out of her room waving as a man walked out too buttoning his shirt 
“Sorry, just remember what you wanted to say and tell me later.” you said smiling and standing up and walking over to Remi
Draken watched you as you walked away. He saw Remi give you a hug, and the man that was walking out checked you out to which Draken gave him a pissed off look. Making the man smile nervously, wave, and leave. 
Do you really wanna live your life like this, Y/n?
He thought to himself before packing up his trash and throwing it away
Remi took your pictures, telling you to do different poses etc, and you finally settled on one. You walked over to the front of the house to place your picture in its designated area above your name. You signed, stepping back to look at it, fixing your gaze to see Draken was walking over with his hands in his pocket, looking as he was going to leave. You saw him glance at the photo making you feel slightly embarrassed.
“Nice.” he said smiling but looking into your eyes in a way where it looked like he was concerned for you. 
Just as you were about to thank him a man walked in and started looking at you making you feel nervous. The man requested you, and so you smiled at him pointing your hand to where the showers were, as you started to walk behind him, you turned your hand giving a thumbs up to Draken with a nervously flushed face, smiling, as he he brought his hand up giving you a thumbs up with soft and concerning eyes before opening the door and leaving. It made your smile fade slightly, you’ve seen that face before from him. But not from today.. And it was all you could think about during your work. 
As you laid in your room, after work you couldn’t help but feel a little bit...stupid? You felt so unsatisfied, not because of your customers but because you just couldn’t remember. It felt like an itch you couldn’t scratch hard enough, and with every interaction you had with the boy almost felt like a tease, like the itch just became more itchy and your scratches just became more weak. Maybe if you spend more time with him, you’ll remember? 
It had been about 4 weeks, 4 weeks of saving your money, and every 4 weeks the boss collected his fair share of the cut. It wasn’t a pretty 4 weeks, it was probably the worst 4 weeks of your life. But... you and Draken would often exchange stories about your lives late at night which you enjoyed a lot. It always makes you feel better. But yet again you still couldn't figure him out. You felt as though you’ve met him before, and as though you two have had these kinds of talks before. 
Draken only grew more and more helpless, seeing how you still haven’t remembered. He was slowly watching your life crumble. He felt so angry that you settled and believed you deserved to live like this, barely scraping by. He felt so awful, and saw how you grew so tired of it all. He just so badly wanted you to remember him, so that he could once again talk to you like he did before.
You had one last customer before closing, going through your usual routine, this n that, the man offered you a drink. You stupid obliged drinking it, hoping it would make your time more enjoyable but you were wrong, so very wrong, and so very stupid for drinking that stupid drink. You remember some parts, you did your job, then it all went black.. You woke up after hearing knocking on your door. You jumped out of bed, confused. You remember seeing the man leave as you started to fall asleep but that's about it. Usually you never fall asleep after the work because you never do much, your mind started to panic. But the door opened revealing Remi smiling.
“Hey sleepy! Boss says it’s your turn, come on, get your cash!” she said smiling 
“Right let me just..it’s in my drawer..I don't know why I fell asleep so fast I think alcohol makes me sleepy.” you said getting out of bed and kneeling in front of your drawer to get the envelope of cash you had been saving.
“Heh, same here. I never accepted drinks from clients..they never had good intentions with that!” she said coming over and sitting at your bed 
“..yeah.” you said starting to feel that panic arise in your body when seeing the envelope was...gone.
“What's wrong?” asked Remi noticing you were frozen 
“I- the money..It’s gone..he took it..” you said with wide eyes feeling as though you were about to sob realizing you had just lost thousands of yen.
“Don’t say that..it..it probably just got misplaced! Come on, I'll help you look!” said Remi getting up  
You couldn't even respond because of the amount of panic you were in. Your heart was racing and you felt tears fall from your eyes. After about 15 minutes of looking, you two found nothing. Absolutely nothing. You sat on the floor with your hand over your mouth, again, trying to keep a level head. 
What now..?
You thought to yourself feeling hot tears stream from your face.
“Hey..guys? Boss is calling for you Y/n..what’s going on?” asked Rema walking in seeing you covering your face, crying 
“She was robbed by the guy who just left, he put something in her drink to knock her out while he looked around and took the money...she doesn’t have the money.” said Remi 
Rema’s mouth parted in shock and pity. 
How could you mess up something so easy? All you had to do was keep your money safe. But you even failed at that. 
“You have to tell him, Y/n.” said Rema rubbing your back
“Yea..yeah, could you two just give me a second? I’ll be right out.” you said smiling while wiping your face 
“Sure.” they said frowning and walking out 
You fisted your hands, and grabbed your covers before screaming into them to muffle your sounds..
Okay..it was a couple of thousand yen...not too bad right? I can promise the money by tomorrow..I’ll pick up some sort of street job...yeah! That’s good. Everything is fine..it’s fine.
You thought to yourself before wiping your face on more time and slapping both sides of your cheeks to wake you up.
You got up and walked to the bosses door feeling the eyes of people on your back. You knocked on the door before opening it slowly, refusing to make eye contact as you went to stand in front of the man with your arms behind your back.
“Alrighttt, let’s see here, in the last four weeks you had a total of 37 customers, so you should have around 300,000 yen, correct?” he asked looking at his paper 
“Yes.” you said still looking down
“Alright, just hand it to me so I can count and divide it, you can sit.” he said smiling holding his hand out 
“I..I don-” you said before being interrupted by a knock 
“Come in.” he said 
“Hey sorry dad, Y/n left her money with me while she went out. Thought I should bring it to her. Remember, Y/n?” said Draken walking in with an envelop in his hand smiling as he came to stand next to you, as you nodded your head ‘yes’ 
“Oh, thank you Ken.” he said smiling and taking the envelop 
Your mouth parted as you gave a confused look, Draken only smiled and gave you a thumbs up while his dad counted the money. You felt so guilty and shocked, and all you could do was just stand there, like an idiot. 
“Here you are...120,000 back..” he said, patting the money on the table to make it flat, putting it back into the envelope and handing it to you
You hesitantly brought your hand to grab it, glancing over at Draken who gave you small smile
“Thank you-” you said to him seeing Draken was already opening the door to leave 
You quickly followed after him as he walked into his room. Before entering his room he turned around and looked down at you 
You felt your eyes soften as you felt as though you were about to cry again, you tilted your head and neck down biting the inside of your cheek to keep in your cry. 
“I promise I’ll pay all of it back by tomorrow, all 300,000.” you said 
“Do you ever give yourself a break?” he asked as you brought your head up to look at him seeing he looked almost irritated 
“You didn’t even ask why I did it, you just immediately jumped to feeling guilty. And you don’t need to pay me back. Really.” he said bringing his hand to close to the door, but you stopped him by grabbing his wrist making his breath hitch 
“Why?” you asked looking into his eyes 
“You still don’t remember? Even after all this time we’ve spent together?” he asked smiling as you took your hand off his wrist 
“Remember...?” you asked furrowing your eyebrows in confusion, but then it suddenly hit you
“I swear it wasn’t me! I didn't steal!” yelled a little boy with blonde hair as two cops stood in front of him 
You tilted your head and walked closer, but still keeping your distance to hear. It was a winter day and you were on your way to the corner store to buy some snacks, but you were met with an interesting scene. You kept your hands in your pockets as you listened over to the boy screaming and pleading his innocence 
“I wouldn’t steal something so stupid! What would a kid like me need a lighter for!! I don’t know how it ended up in my pocket! Lay off!” he yelled as the officer dangled the lighter in front of his face
A lighter?
“Keep it down! We know how troubled you kids are here! Especially with those tattoos!” yelled back the cop as the boy grew angry and fisted his hands, ready to punch the cop
“Hey!!!” he heard a voice yelled 
“Hey wait a minute!” you yelled waving your hand smiling as you ran to the scene 
“Can we help you?” asked one of the cops in a soft tone 
The blonde boy grew quiet, and you saw his hands loosen as he looked at your smiling face 
“Yeah, why are you two yelling at my brother?” you asked furrowing your brows at the two grown man 
“...Your so-called brother stole a lighter from the corner store right behind you, where are your parents? We would like to have a word with them.” he said standing up straight 
“Yeah, and talk about how they let their son tattoo himself already..” said one under his breath making the other laugh 
You looked over at the boy growing angry, you gave him a smile..making him calm down.
“He said it was just an accident, I asked him to pick up a lighter from the store so that we could light a candle at our father’s grave! See!” you said digging into your bag to pull out a candle 
“He probably felt pressured because I asked him to get it, so if you’re gonna get mad at someone, get mad at me!” you said as you started to fake cry 
“It’s our father's death anniversary, and you're yelling at kids for making a mistake.” you faked cried
“Yeah!!” yelled the boy making you smile under your hands as the two officers became anxious, feeling bad for what they had just done.
“..we’re sorry. Please let us apologize.” they said slightly bowing at you two��
“I don’t think we can accept it...you two also made fun of the dragon tattoo on his head!...dragons were our dads favorite animal. He risked his life fighting for Japan and you two are laughing at him! Is that how your mother taught you how to behave?” you asked pretending to wipe you tears as the blonde boy watched you in awe seeing you toy with grown men 
“Please let us treat you both to whatever you’d like from the corner store as an apology!” they both said bowing lower making you smile and look back at the boy. You gave him a thumbs up as a smile grew on his face 
“Fine..come on then?” you said as both the officers raised their heads, opening the doors of the corner store for you both 
You and the blonde boy walked around the store, filling your baskets with all types of things. The blonde boy watched you in just pure awe as you walked around picking your favorite snacks, as he did the same, glancing at you every now and then. 
“Here.” you said smiling at the cops 
“Right!” they said frantically taking out their wallets as the boy placed down his stuff nervously, still watching you
“Oh and-” you said reaching your hand to grab the lighter from the officer and placing it into the bunch of snacks 
You smiled, your hands were behind your back as you watched the officers pay for yours and the boys' food, placing them into bags for you guys too. You grabbed the lighter and your bag, as the boy did the same 
“Mom told us to meet her at the cemetery steps, remember?” you said looking into the boys eyes
“..yeah, I remember.” he said smiling feeling his face become hot 
“Let’s go then.” you said smiling and taking his hand as you two ran out of the store 
After a bit you two stopped and sat on the curbside while you both chose a snack to eat.  
“Here’s your lighter, you don’t have to stay with me by the way.” you said handing him the steel lighter 
“..Thanks” he said 
“Sure- what do you need it for anyway?” you asked smiling 
“My boss asked for it.” he said putting it in his pocket
“Oh, are you in some type of delinquent group?” you asked looking at him 
“Yeah..” he said smiling 
“That's cool, what do you guys do?” you asked taking a sip of your drink 
“We kinda just...like...do stupid stuff and fight..” he said 
“Sounds fun, but...stupid.” you said laughing making him scoff 
“Why’d you do it?” he asked 
“Do what?” you asked back turning you gaze to him 
“Come in to cover me. You could’ve gotten in a lot of trouble because of me.” he said with a frustrated face 
“You’re right, I just wanted to, that's all.” you said smiling making his mouth part and cheeks redden
“You seem pretty fun too so I thought we could be friends or something..” you said nervously 
“Yeah! Sure- We can be friends!” he said happily making you feel flustered 
“Well then, it’s nice to meet you, my name is Y/n, yours?” you asked holding over your hand 
“Ken, but you can call me Draken-” he said taking ahold of your hand gently as you gave him a closed eyed smile blushing 
“where the hell did you find that candle and com up with that whole sob story Y/n?”
“Dunno, I saw the candle on the ground by a newspaper, I kinda just winged it- “
After that day you remember hanging out with Draken almost every other day. You remember him telling you how he and his close friends started their own gang and needed some sort of funding, and so you gave it to him, on his birthday.
“I saved up! You said that you and your friends needed some money to start off so that you guys could buy a flag or banner? Right? Well, here’s 30,000 yen for your birthday!” you said handing him an envelope and a small balloon.
“Are-are you serious right now Y/n?” he asked taking the gifts, opening the envelope to look inside to see the money as his eyes lit up 
“Yeah, I babysit more kids now so I was able to put some aside for you.” you said smiling satisfied with his reaction 
He didn’t even say anything, all he did was bring his arms around you upper body, hugging you tight making you laugh as you brought yours to hug him back 
“Thank you- you’re the best! The guys will be so happy!” he said smiling while grasping your wrists in excitement. Your eyes traced over his face as they soften. You smiled. 
“Likewise.” 
And- after that, you remember the day you 2 separated as friends. You both sat on the curbside, you remembered you called him to come and see you. It was a winter night and the sun was going down. 
“I uh..well I don’t really know how to say this without sounding cliche but-”
“What? Are you gonna confess that you’re madly in love with me or something?” he asked grinning, making you sweat drop 
“Jeez be quiet...I’m trying to make this a memorable moment-” you signed smiling, placing your palms on the cold cement 
“Alright let’s hear it then Y/n-!” he said bringing his hands to the back of his head as he laid down looking up at the stars 
You only frowned slightly, you shifted your position so that you could sit beside him and have a good look at his face. 
“You’re scaring me..” he said jokingly making you smile 
“It was really fun the past year.” you said smiling as Draken shot his head up to look at you face to face 
“The hell are you talking like that for?” he asked furrowing his brows 
“My parents can’t afford living in any districts in Tokyo anymore, so we’re moving to another city… about 4 hours train ride from Tokyo so-” you said looking down at your hands on the floor
“So? You act like I won't be able to come and see you or you come and see me..” he said ducking his head a bit so that you could look at him 
“Draken, train tickets are about 220 yen per person, I can't afford it, and if you came by to see me I'd feel guilty because you’d be wasting your money just to only see me for like an hour.” you said 
“How can I be wasting my money on you? It’s not wasting if I wanna do it and see you, plus what makes you think it'll only be a couple hours?” he asked 
“I’ll have to start working once we get there, so I wouldn’t have anytime...I wanna start saving so that one day I can come back to Tokyo and live here, so that I can see your dream come true of helping your friend create a ‘new era of delinquents’ you know? I’ll even help you guys if you want with financial stuff or something.” you said smiling at him 
Draken bit the inside of his cheek. He wanted to tell you so bad how he felt but..
“Look, I have a feeling I know what you’re gonna say..just remember what you wanted to say and tell me later, okay?” you said placing your hand on top of his causing his eyes to widen 
“...You’ll remember me, right?” he asked looking into your eyes deeply making your mouth part 
“Yeah, I’ll remember you as long as you remember what you wanted to tell me. Cause I feel the same” you said smiling as a tear fell from your eyes 
“good...I will.” he said smiling back and tilting his head and wiping it off your face
After the memories hit you, you stood there with wide eyes and tears, with your wrist covering your quivering mouth. You had completely suppressed your memories of Draken, and your feelings because you knew you wouldn't be able handle being apart from him for so long. And he did the same. You couldn’t imagine how unbearable it was for him to be waiting up like this. You looked up at him seeing his eyes were softly looking at you. You could do nothing but bring your arms around him hugging him, as he brought his arms around you to do the same. You were still such in shock. 
“I never thought you’d end up in a place like this, living a life like this.” he said against your ear 
“I don’t wanna see you like this, please let me take care of you like you did for me..” he said said tightening his grip slightly  
You could only cry at his words, you didn’t even wanna try to speak because you knew it would only come out as a sob. Was it really alright for you to rely on someone so much?
He pulled back from the hug and looked at your face, seeing you were still crying as you nodded your head ‘yes’, he smiled and wiped them away with his thumb. The smile on his face...he looked so satisfied...and happy...happy that you finally remembered. Finally remembered him.
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trini-trin-trin · 4 years ago
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Sharing this from a FB group that I am in. I was very moved by the article and felt affinity with the experiences shared. A really sweet read.
Here is the article if you don't want to click on the link (I know it is a little long, but well worth your time to read!):
The letter I received ten years ago was unsigned and bore no return address. Clearly its author did not expect, much less want, a reply. A message in a bottle, from no one to no one, that letter still remains the most bizarre form of communication. It asks nothing but to be read, promises nothing but to share a few facts and feelings, and, seeing that it must have been dashed off on a lined yellow sheet that seemed hastily torn out of a pad of paper, the author would not be surprised if, after skimming through it, the recipient decided to crumple and lob it into the closest dust bin.
The letter is one page long. One page is enough. The handwriting is uneven, perhaps because the author had lost the habit of writing in longhand and preferred the keyboard. But his grammar is perfect. The man knew what he was doing. I assume he was writing the note by hand because he didn’t want traces of it on his laptop, or because he knew he was never going to send it as an email and risk a reply. Now that I think of it, he probably didn’t care if it even reached its recipient, a local Bay Area reporter who had mentioned my novel about two young men who fall in love one summer in Italy in the mid-1980s. The reporter eventually forwarded it to me, minus its envelope with the postmark. It took no time to see that all the author of the letter was looking for was a chance to blurt out the words he couldn’t dare breathe elsewhere.
My book had spoken to him. His letter spoke to me.
So here it is: dated April 16, 2008.
I came upon Mr. Aciman’s book while on a business trip back East. Not the type of book I am normally able to read, so I bought a copy for the flight home. I think I’m glad I did.
You see, I was Elio. I was 18 and my Oliver was 22. Though the time and place were different, the feelings were remarkably the same. From believing that you are the only person who has these feelings, to the whole “he loves me – he loves me not” scenario, Mr. Aciman got it right. I was particularly impressed with the attention he gave to the morning after Elio’s and Oliver’s first encounter. The guilt, the loathing, the fear. I felt it too much. I had to put the book down for a while.
But in the end I was able to finish the book before we landed at SFO. Which was good, because I couldn’t take the book home. Unlike Elio it was I who married and had children. My Oliver died from AIDS in 1995. I’m still living a parallel life. My name is not important. His name was Dwight.
Instead, I kept the letter. I kept it for ten years.
What moved me was not just its sobering matter-of-factness or its hint of downplayed sorrow, but the associations it provoked in my mind. It reminded me of those short, clipped messages to loved ones, written by people about to be shipped off to the death camps who knew they’d never be heard from again. There is a chilling immediacy about their hurriedly scribbled notes that say everything there is to say in the fewest possible words — there wasn’t enough time for more, no smarmy pieties, no hand-wringing, no treacly hugs and kisses before the tragic end. It also made me think of the moving phone messages left by those who finally realized they were not going to make it out alive from the Twin Towers and that only their family’s answering machine was going to take their call.
“My name is not important,” he writes, almost as an apology for remaining anonymous; yet the author drops quite a number of hints about himself — hints he likely knows will stir his reader’s wistful curiosity to know what made him write the letter in the first place, what he hoped to accomplish, and if writing did indeed help. The letter itself allows us to see that he travels for business. We also sense that he probably lives in the Bay Area and that he travels not infrequently to the East Coast, since, as he writes, he is “back” in the East. And we know one thing more: that he simply needed to come out and tell someone that a man called Dwight had been his lover when the two were young. The rest is a cloud. We’ll never know more. Writing has served its purpose. We write, it seems, to reach out to others. Whether we know them or not doesn’t matter. We write to put out into the real world something extremely private within us, to make real what often feels unreal and ever so elusive about ourselves. We write to give a shape to what would otherwise remain amorphous. This is as true about authors as about those who want to correspond with them. Over the years, many have written to me either after reading or seeing Call Me by Your Name. Some tried to meet me; others confided things they’d never told anyone; and some even managed to call me at the office and, on speaking about my novel, would eventually apologize before bursting out crying. Some were in jail; some were barely adolescents, others old enough to look back at loves seven decades past; and some were priests locked in silence and secrecy. Many were closeted, others totally out; some were widows who felt a resurgence of hope if only by reading about the loves of two young men called Elio and Oliver in Italy; some were very young girls eager to meet their long-awaited Oliver; and some recalled former gay lovers whom they’d occasionally bump into years later but who’d never acknowledge what they’d once shared and done together when both were schoolmates and neither was married. All were keenly aware of living a parallel life. In that parallel life things are as they perhaps should be. Elio and Oliver still live together. And no one has secrets there.
Unlike Dwight’s lover, everyone who took the time to write to me did not withhold their names, but all had, at one point or another, withheld something very primal. They withheld it from themselves, from a relative, from a friend, a classmate, or colleague, or from a beloved who would never have guessed what troubled longings seethed below their averted gaze whenever they crossed paths.
Some readers wrote to tell me they felt that my novel had changed them, and given them new insights into themselves; some felt it was urging them finally to turn a new leaf in their lives. But some couldn’t go so far and, despite their perfect command of language, confessed lacking the words to explain why they were so moved by my novel or why they felt an unresolved longing for things they’d never considered or desired before. They were experiencing an upwell of emotions and of ungraspable might-have-beens that were asking to be reckoned with because they seemed more real than life itself, a sense of themselves that beckoned from an opposite bank they’d never known was there and whose potential loss now was a source of inconsolable grief. Hence their tears, their regrets, and the overpowering sense of being lost in their own lives.
And yet, they said, theirs were not tears of sorrow. They were tears of recognition, as though the novel itself were a mirror for readers to watch their own emotions laid bare before them. These responses made me aware that Call Me by Your Name does not call attention to anything readers didn’t already know, nor does it bring new truths or revelations; all it does is shed new light on things that were long familiar but that they never took the time to consider. It would be so tempting to say that they are reminded of their forgotten first loves; the truth is that all loves, even those that occur late in life, are first loves. There is always fear, shame, reluctance, and not a tiny dose of spite. Desire is agony.
Everyone who’s read Call Me by Your Name understands not only the struggle both to speak and hold back their truth but also the shame that comes whenever we want something from someone. Desire is always cagey, always secretive — we’ll tell everyone we know about the person we crave to hold naked in our arms, but the very last one to know this will be the person we crave. Same-sex desire is even more guarded and watchful, especially in those who are just discovering their sexuality. Awkwardness and desire are strange bedfellows at a young age, but shame and inexperience are just as paralyzing as fear when we watch them tussling with the urge to be bold. You’re torn between the raw horniness that makes you dream scenes you hope to forget as soon as you’re up and the scenes you pray you’ll dream again and again — if dreams are all you’ll have. Silence and solitude exact a cost that leaves us emotionally wrecked. At some point we need to speak.
So “is it better to speak or die?” asks Elio, the narrator of Call Me by Your Name, quoting words penned by the sixteenth-century Marguerite de Navarre in her collection of tales known as The Heptameron. Marguerite was the sister of King Francis I and the grandmother of Henry IV, himself the grandfather of Louis XIV, hence she was plenty familiar with court intrigue, gossip, and the risks of opening up to someone who may not welcome what’s in our heart and could easily make us pay for it. Not everyone who has written to me has dared to speak their hearts to those they loved. Some have sought silence — slow, lingering droplets of quiet desperation taken every night before bedtime until they realize they’ve been dead and didn’t even know it. Many have written to me with the feeling of having missed their chance when someone tethered his rowboat to their jetty and simply asked them to jump in. “Some sentence or thought on almost every page,” writes a reader, “triggers tears and knots my throat and chest. Tears well up in my eyes on the subway, at my computer at work, walking down the street. Perhaps I am weeping in part because I know that at my age there is virtually no possibility of experiencing anything remotely comparable to what Elio experiences with Oliver.” Someone else writes, “Reading Call Me by Your Name made me feel a love I never had.” A happily married 50-plus colleague took me aside and said, “I don’t think I’ve ever been this much in love in my whole life.” “I'm 23,” tweeted someone else, “and have never felt such love, until I read Call Me by Your Name. I feel like I lived it.” “Elio and I are essentially the same age,” writes a teenage girl. “I have never really experienced his environment of the Italian summer…My experiences have only taken place halfway between nature and smog, however I have felt the same tension, fear, guilt and overwhelming love that you express perfectly through both Elio and Oliver…Finding myself in Elio was something I never expected and I’m positive that I won’t experience anything quite like it ever again. The first girl I ever loved remains…the only girl I have ever loved and though everything she and I shared…lives now as a secret between two friends.” “I finished reading Call Me by Your Name a couple of days ago,” writes someone else, “and wanted to let you know how much it affected me. It felt like a narration of my thoughts that I had systematically buried long ago.” And finally this from a 72-year-old: “I was fascinated by the idea of parallel lives where would I have been if I had gone with him, where would I be if I traveled alone? Maybe the point is just what do I do with the gift you have given me during the remainder of my life.”
There are at least 500 more such letters and emails.
Some find themselves weeping at the end of the film or the novel, not for what happened long ago or for what did not and might never happen in their own lives but for what has yet to happen, for the terrifying moment when they too will soon have to decide whether to speak or die. This from an 18-year-old: “[Your novel] gives me hope that one day I will meet someone whom I desire so badly that I’ll actually find it in me to make a move, the way Oliver is that someone for Elio. Maybe my Oliver will also turn out to be someone that I realize I love as well as desire.” She was crying for a week, as was this 15-year-old young man: “I stopped reading…because I didn’t want [the book] to end, didn’t want the wounds that you caused me to close, I didn’t want to overcome, for some reason that I have yet to find out. I wanted to stay a wreck, emotionally and mentally fragile….My mother handed me tissues because she had never seen me cry like this. I had finished your book and ‘moved’ is too weak a word to express what your book had done to me. Here a week later and it is literally all I can think about, not my midterms coming up, but…Elio and Oliver and if it is better to speak or die. You answered questions I didn’t even think I had.”
Indeed, the whole novel seems to enable the outing of all manner of feelings, feelings from Elio’s relentless inward journey and obsessive self-examination that readers are invited to identify with. Through Elio’s unfettered introspection they too feel exposed and sliced open like a crustacean without a slough, now forced to look at itself in the mirror. No wonder they are moved. The mask that is torn off their faces is not just the mask that conceals same-sex desires from themselves and from others. Rather, it is the realization, through Elio’s voice, of what they truly feel, who they truly are, what they fear, what bears their signature, and what coy little shenanigans they go through to read others and hope to reach them. Some identified with some effusive sentences in my novel so much that they had them tattooed on their bodies. They even attach photos of these tattoos. People have also tattooed peaches on themselves!
But what moves most people — and this is as true now as it was when the novel first came out — is the father’s speech. Here he not only tells his son to nurse the flame and “don’t snuff it out” after his son’s lover has left Italy, but that he too, the father, envies his son’s relationship with a male lover. This speech tears away the last vestige of a veil between reader and truth and is a moving tribute to the irreducible honesty between father and son.
Most readers have written to me about the scene because the father’s speech rekindles the very difficult moment when they decided to come out to their parents — or, as is often the case with people 60, or 70 or older, it reminds them of the conversation they wished they’d had but never did have with their parents. This is the loss no one forgets and from which no one recovers after seeing Call Me by Your Name. It bears the very essence of that precious and life-defining might-have-been moment that never happened and never will.
Here is the speech:
“Look…[y]ou had a beautiful friendship. Maybe more than a friendship. And I envy you. In my place, most parents would hope the whole thing goes away, or pray that their sons land on their feet soon enough. But I am not such a parent. In your place, if there is pain, nurse it, and if there is a flame, don’t snuff it out, don’t be brutal with it. Withdrawal can be a terrible thing when it keeps us awake at night, and watching others forget us sooner than we’d want to be forgotten is no better. We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything — what a waste!...
“… {L]et me say one more thing. It will clear the air. I may have come close, but I never had what you had. Something always held me back or stood in the way. How you live your life is your business. But remember, our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. Most of us can’t help but live as though we’ve got two lives to live, one is the mockup, the other the finished version, and then all those versions in between. But there’s only one, and before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it. Right now there’s sorrow. I don’t envy the pain. But I envy you the pain.”
I received the anonymous letter sometime in early May 2008. At the time, I was staying at my parents’, because my father was suffering from throat and mouth cancer and was already in hospice care. He had refused radiation and chemotherapy, so I knew his days were numbered; though morphine was clouding his mind, he was still lucid enough to bandy a few quips about a host of subjects. He had stopped eating and drinking water because swallowing had become very painful. One afternoon while I was stealing a nap, the phone rang. A reporter I’d met in California had just received a letter, which she wanted to share with me. I told her to read it over the phone. After she’d read it I asked if she felt she could mail it to me. I wanted to show it to my father, I said, and explained he was dying. She felt for me. We talked about my father for a while. I told her I was trying to make it up to him these days, and that he too had been exceptionally easy to be with. How was it growing up with him? she asked. Tense, I replied. Always is, she added. Then the conversation ended, and she promised to mail the letter soon.
After hanging up, I got out of bed and went in to see him. Over the past few days, I had made a point of reading to him, which he liked a great deal, especially now that he was having difficulty focusing. But rather than read to him the memoirs of Chateaubriand, one of his favorite authors, and feeling buoyed by the letter I’d been read on the phone, I asked if he’d like me to read from the French translation of Call Me by Your Name, the galleys of which I had just received from Paris that very morning. Why not, since you wrote it, he said. He was proud of me. So I began to read from the very beginning, and soon enough I knew I was opening up a subject neither he nor I had ever broached before. But I knew he knew what I was reading and why I was reading it to him. This made me happy. Perhaps it made him happy as well. I’ll never know.
That evening, after the rest of us had dinner, he asked if I could continue reading from my novel. I was nervous about arriving at the father’s speech because I didn’t know how he’d react to it, though he was the kind of father who would have given that very same speech himself. But the speech was two hundred pages away still, and that would have taken many, many days. Perhaps I should skip some parts, I thought. But no, I wanted to read him the whole book. My father didn’t last long enough to hear the father’s speech. And when the letter finally arrived from California, he was already gone. His name was Henri, he was 93 years old, and he inspired everything I’ve written.
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streetlight11 · 3 years ago
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Dystopia pt 8 (FINALE)
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Summary: You were an Amity born. You were taught to value kindness and harmony. But you also valued bravery and knowledge. After the test to see which faction best suited you, you were given the choice to either stay in your faction or leave. When you chose to leave your faction for another, your whole life changed and you wondered if it was the right decision. You pondered over it at first, all until you met him.
Theme: Divergent au, strangers to lovers
Genre: mild action [I tried], angst, fluff, slowburn
Warnings: mentions of blood and violence
WC: 3.6k
Pairing: Trainer!Jungkook x Initiate!FemReader
Tips: In this whole series, Y/N is a few years younger than JK. Those who were initiates like Y/N that just ended the Choosing Ceremony, are all the same age. None of these characters portray who the mentioned people are in real life whatsoever! It's just a fictional character!
a/n: Hello! Guess what? You made it to the end! I know this is a short series but I'm more than thankful if you have made it this far. Although it's quite short for a finale, I hope I didn't disappoint you too much! But anyways, here's the final part for this series :) Enjoyyy
~~~
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With hurried steps, all three of them quickly hollered their way through the facility in hopes that they would reach the dorms in time. Jungkook’s heart was beating so fast against his chest, unsure if he could even calm himself down knowing something bad had happened to you. That was the last thing he wanted. From the day he saw you a few weeks back, he knew he would like you.
He knew there was something about you that leaves him being all clammy and nervous despite his amazing skill at hiding his emotions. Jungkook never knew he would manage to get close to you, thinking it was impossible considering he was a trainer and you were an initiate.
However, it looks like fate has a different plan for you and him when he saw you training by yourself in the middle of the night. That was when he first got to have a close interaction with you.
Even though it was just him teaching you basic tips on how to improve your skills for each of the different skill sets, he still got to talk to you and also earn your trust after a while. And as the days gradually went by, it was needless to say that Jungkook had grown so fond of you and even had a crush on you.
Yes, a Dauntless Trainer having a crush on a Dauntless Initiate.
How cute.
Ultimately, it all goes downhill for him as he finally arrives at the shared dormitory, only to find the rest of the initiates crowding around at one spot. The minute Jungkook and Changkyun pushed through the crowd, their hearts stopped for a millisecond upon seeing what the fuss was about.
There you were, cradled in Hyunjae’s arms as Gahyeon was crying with her hands desperately pressing what looks to be a completely blood soaked towel against your throat.
Your throat has been slit, not too deep to kill you but just enough to render you voiceless.
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You were just turning around on your bed when you peeked your eyes open out of instinct, feeling as though you were being watched. Except, you weren’t expecting for it to be legit. Because the minute you opened your eyes, there was a hooded figure looming over you with a hand raised to their head level with what looks to be a knife from the Training Room.
Fuck!
Before your mind could react, your body seemed to move faster as your arms swiveled to a cross position over your face right when the person launched his attack to your head.
With the tip of its blade just barely missing your right eye socket.
You used all your energy to shove their hand away using your arms, only to kick their stomach harshly. They stumbled back a little before lunging back at you. However, you quickly rolled out of bed to your left, falling to the ground with a soft thud just as they plunged the blade into the mattress right where your chest would’ve been.
You rushed to your feet, making a break for it to the open toilet but your steps faltered when you felt a sharp stab to your calf.
“Ah! Fuck!” You loudly hissed to yourself.
The blade got pulled out of your leg harshly, only for you to flip around on the ground.
The person kneeled over you as they tried to stab you in the face again but you managed to grab their wrist with both hands. They were strong. A little too strong if you say so yourself. However, for some reason, you felt like you knew this person.
You were struggling. You were struggling hard to push their hand away. Mustering whatever strength you had left, you used all your power to push them back.
For a moment, you were glad that they nearly fell off you.
However, you weren’t mentally and physically ready for what he was about to do next. And that was for him to make one swift swing of his arm. It all happened so fast, you didn’t even realize what he did until you felt something wet trickle down your neck. You tried to curse at them but instead you were shocked when nothing came out of your mouth.
That wasn’t until one of your hands reached up for your throat and you felt it.
The open slit, the feeling of wet liquid, your nostrils filling with the strong smell of copper, and finally, bringing your fingers up to see your fingers coated in your own red crimson blood.
Your mouth hung agape as you tried to speak but there was nothing. Tears welled up in your eyes as the person got up and smirked down at you.
“Goodnight loser. I hope you rot in hell.”
They soon took off running, leaving you there helpless with no voice to scream for help, to tell people who did it. But of course, you weren’t stupid. Despite the lack of light, only an idiot couldn’t catch on easily. For there is only one person who calls you ‘Loser’ right from the start. Your doubts were confirmed the minute that nickname left their lips.
Dumb move Yeonjun.
Since you couldn’t scream for help, you slowly began to drag yourself across the room, leaving a long trail of blood behind your leg where you got stabbed only to reach the end of Gahyeon’s bed.
With one swift grasp, you managed to hold onto her shirt and that was enough to wake her.
It took her a second to realize what happened until she saw the trail of blood on the floor and your bleeding throat that you were desperately putting pressure on. She let out a shrilling scream before yelling for help from the others. Everyone began to panic at the gruesome scene, making Hyunjae cradle you while Yunho rushed out to get help.
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Jungkook carried you to the hospital wing, with Gahyeon, Hyunjae, Yunho and Changkyun tagging along. One of the nurses inspected your injury, seeing that you’ve lost quite a bit of blood. She mentioned that they had to give you some blood in order to save you and they have to be the same blood type as yours. After much inspection, it was clear that only Jungkook and Hyunjae shared the same blood type as you.
Both of them offered to donate some of their blood to you to save your life. While the two were being drawn of their blood, Changkyun went ahead and brought the other two back to their dormitory to rest. You were already laying there on the medical bed unconscious which means you couldn’t feel the way Gahyeon gently gave your blood coated hands a small squeeze.
“Please be okay, Y/N.” She whispered as a tear rolled down her cheek. Yunho comforted the girl before they both left with Changkyun.
A few minutes later, the nurse managed to collect as much blood as you probably needed after losing them quite a bit. She placed a bandaid over the spots where she injected the tube in their arms. After she was done, she dismissed the two boys but Jungkook asked if he could stay.
She nodded, setting up the equipment so that the blood she collected from the two gentlemen could be transferred into your body through the IV in your hand.
Hyunjae left after caressing the top of your head, wishing you a speedy recovery.
The nurse went ahead and disinfected your wounds before suturing the open cuts and wrapping them with bandages. Once she was done, she excused herself, leaving you alone with Jungkook as the male went over to scoot his chair closer to your side. Jungkook carefully reaches for your hand that didn’t have the needle attached. He brings it up to his lips, kissing your knuckles softly.
“I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry I couldn’t protect you. I’m sorry this happened to you Y/N. You truly don’t deserve this…” Jungkook whispered as he stood up to plant a gentle kiss on your forehead.
He felt sorry. He felt sick. He felt confused. But more importantly, he felt furious at whoever did this to you. Of course he didn’t know who but you knew.
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You woke up to a sharp pain in your throat, feeling it get itchy like an unusual sore throat. The prickling pain in your right calf made your leg jolt as you shot your tired eyes open. The morning sun filled the room. You carefully looked around to find you alone in the room which looks to be the hospital wing.
Memories from last night suddenly came flashing into your mind like a tsunami, and yet, you still couldn’t wrap your mind around it.
Did that really happen?
Was it all a dream?
You almost didn’t want to believe it until your hands reached up to your throat and you felt the soft material of the bandage taped onto your neck. Of course, your stubbornness was trying to make you think otherwise so you opened your mouth to speak.
Truth be told, nothing comes out of your mouth. Absolutely nothing. Not even a sound.
Your thoughts were swirling, a million things running across your head at that very moment. From the incident last night to the final evaluation test you were supposed to have today. The test was supposed to determine your final results of your initiation. It was supposed to determine whether you get to stay in Dauntless or you get kicked out and become Factionless.
Of course, there are two ways of getting that second option. First is by failing Stage 3, and second is of course by not attending the final test at all.
How wonderful.
As your mind was swirling with these complications, you completely missed the figure that was making their way to you. It wasn’t until they were a few feet from you that you looked up only to lock eyes with Jungkook.
Immediately, a whole swarm of emotions came rushing through you as you began to cry. Jungkook rushed over to you, only to hush you.
“Shh… Shh… Don’t cry. It’s okay. I’m here. You’re fine. I’m here.” Jungkook cooed as he held you in his arms, feeling the way your arms wrapped around his waist tightly like you were afraid he might disappear if you let go. His heart swelled upon feeling his shirt get soaked from your tears.
Your silent cries only made his heart drop even more. Jungkook caressed the back of your head lovingly, making sure to give you small reassuring kisses to the side of your head as a way to hopefully calm you down.
You both stayed like that for a bit before he sang you a sweet song in your ear.
Jungkook felt your body relax in his touch, happy that his singing made you calmer. After a while, he pulled away slowly to look you in the eye. How is it possible that you are just sitting there crying your eyes out and yet you still looked beautiful? Or maybe it’s just him.
Who knows.
Nevertheless, he wipes your tears with his thumbs and soon smiles down at you.
“You’re so strong. You’re a strong girl Y/N. And I really admire you for that.” He whispered. You couldn’t help but crack a tiny smile when you felt him boop your nose with his own. You had so much to say to him. So much you wanted to share with him. Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on your side today. Just then, Jungkook’s smile faltered and it made you curious.
You reached for his wrist where his hand was just cupping your face softly, to catch his attention. You silently asked him what’s wrong through your worried eyes, hoping he could read your mind.
Thankfully, he did.
“The final stage… It starts in 5 minutes. I talked to the leaders about your current condition. I tried my best to change their mind, Changkyun did try too… Unfortunately, the leaders made an agreement to… disqualify you, which means… y-you…” Jungkook paused as he struggled to convey the message to you but you already knew what it meant.
You violently shook your head at him. You had to redeem yourself. You didn’t plan for this to happen. You were forced to be in this damn medical bed out of your own will. Oh if only they saw who did this to you, would they gladly throw him to the Factionless.
“Decision has been made. Since you can’t physically be there, you’re immediately disqualified.” Jungkook said as you shook your head again. There must be something about the way you were staring at him because at that very moment, it was as though you sent him a message through telepathy.
“Wait a minute… For the final test, you don’t need to talk. You… just need to be physically there for the simulation.” Jungkook said in realization as your eyes lit up.
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“Does that mean… she’s immediately disqualified?” Gahyeon asked sadly, only for Hyunjae to nod.
“I mean, technically according to the rules, you are supposed to be here physically for the final test… So, I guess that’s true then…” Hyunjae said.
The rest of them who were gathered by the side of the hall where the final stage would take place, shared mostly the same emotions about you not being able to join them which would render you as Factionless by default even after all your hard work.
However, it looks like someone couldn’t care less about you not making it.
“Who cares? She doesn't belong in Dauntless anyway.” Yeonjun rolls his eyes as he walks to the front, leaning against one of the pillars. Your friends exchanged a few glances to one another, not feeling good about the way he said that. A few minutes passed, and they had just finished the test with the third person on the list. All the initiates were anxious as they waited for their turn. Soon enough, the Dauntless leader calls out the next name to be on stage.
“Y/F/N.”
With that, the room fell silent as the initiates looked at each other with deep frowns on their faces. A few beats of silences went by, not a single sign of you anywhere. Meanwhile, Yeonjun had that devilish smirk on his face as he felt satisfied with your lack of presence.
Unfortunately, just as the leader was about to call out the next person on the list, Jungkook’s voice echoed around the hall from the opposite end of where the initiates were gathered. That’s when Jungkook emerged through the double doors with you beside him.
He had one arm wrapped around your waist as you limped your way to the platform where the chair was waiting for you. Your friends cheered for your arrival as they shouted a string of goodlucks to you. Yeonjun growled, totally not expecting to find you still alive.
Maybe he didn’t cut you deep enough.
You immediately recognized the lady who was prepping the tools to put you into simulation, to be the same lady you met on your Initiation test.
After you sat down, Jungkook gave your waist a little squeeze before he smiled down at you and whispered, “Goodluck.”
He soon left your side as the lady asked you if you were ready. You gave her a small nod, letting her inject the needle into your neck right below your ear.
Once the serum had been injected into your system, it took effect right away, bringing you to your first simulation. It was the same simulations you went through during your Stage 2. They were all of your fears connecting one simulation to the other. You managed to remember what Jungkook taught you during the past few weeks and how to properly handle each situation like a fellow Dauntless.
The minute your last simulation ended, you woke up calmly only for the lady to smile.
“You did well.” She complimented you as she helped you sit up. Jungkook came to your side and very gently led you off the platform.
“Good job. Looks like my tips worked huh?” Jungkook asked, to which you smiled, feeling shy all of a sudden. He guided you to the side only for your friends to rush over to you.
“Sweetie! You’re okay! How are you?” Gahyeon asked as she hugged you, making you return her hug. You showed an ‘okay’ sign with your hand before Yunho ruffled your hair. “Of course you are, you’re a beast Y/N.” His comment made some of them laugh, including you. Just then, your eyes drifted to your left only to meet Yeonjun’s fiery eyes.
All you wanted to do was throw him in The Pit. The last thing you wanted was to see his competitive ass everyday from now on.
However, you weren’t going to kill him despite all the pain he’s caused you.
After letting you meet up with your friends, Jungkook brought you back to his penthouse to let you rest. He carefully laid you down on his bed, pulling his blanket up to your chest while you snuggled into his side with your head resting on his chest. Jungkook chuckled as he caressed your hair, tucking them behind your ear, making sure to let his fingers softly trace the side of your face as he did so.
“No matter what the results are, I’m never leaving your side. That, I can promise you.” Jungkook said softly as you tilted your head up to look at him. You wished you could speak. You wished you could verbally say this to him outloud. Unfortunately you couldn’t.
In the end, you opted for the saying ‘Actions speak louder than words’ and so, with that being said, you lifted your head up and used your left elbow to prop your body up on the mattress.
Jungkook watched you carefully as you slowly leaned in only to press your lips softly on his. Almost instantly, he wrapped one arm around your waist while the other allowed his fingers to tangle into your soft locks. You reached a hand up to cup his cheek, letting your thumb trace the scar he had on his left cheekbone. You felt him smile against your lips as he pulled away for a breath.
His eyes fluttered open to find your cute ones staring back at him. Jungkook couldn’t help but chuckle as he gently massaged your scalp in a calming manner.
“If that is your way of telling me what I think it is, then I’ll be the one to confirm verbally that I feel the same way too…” Jungkook’s voice was smooth and sultry in your ears, it almost made you melt into a puddle. Almost.
So with one more kiss from him, your heart raced in your chest as he pulled away to let his lips hover over yours before he said the words you’ve been meaning to tell him.
“I love you Y/N.”
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Prologue
6 months had passed, you ended up staying in Dauntless together with Gahyeon, Hyunjae and Yunho. Right after the final stage, you gave Jungkook the weapon Yeonjun used to attack you the night before the final stage. After investigating the weapon and finding evidence that confirms Yeonjun was indeed the attacker, he was immediately thrown out of Dauntless. Rendering him Factionless.
Yes, that jerk deserved it.
Yunho was given the role of a guard due to his unfortunate ranking but hey, at least he wasn’t Factionless.
Gahyeon was a trainer for Dauntless-born initiates while you and Hyunjae were trainers for faction transfers. Although, you only started becoming one after the 3rd month when you were starting to be able to talk again.
And how was your relationship with Jungkook, might I ask?
Well, just splendid.
Your relationship with him only grew stronger each day as he took care of you during the first few months when you still had difficulties to talk. He was always there for you when you needed someone to back you up in heated arguments.
Jungkook took you to visit your parents the day after the final stage. No doubt your parents got upset over what happened to their daughter, they were more than thankful that you were still alive and that Jungkook was there to keep you sane. As the months go by, Jungkook’s feelings for you bloomed.
Today was another day of training for you and your initiates where you managed to guide the new initiates along with Hyunjae’s help.
You were just standing off to the side, letting Hyunjae take over for the knife throwing session when you suddenly felt a pair of strong arms wrapping itself around your waist. You giggled as you turned your head to find Jungkook’s face just mere inches away from yours.
“Not here, love… We’re in the middle of training.” You whispered, earning a soft chuckle from him before he peppered your cheek with kisses.
“Can’t I just give my beautiful girlfriend some loving kisses before I go to my meeting?” Jungkook teased, making you giggle.
“Aren’t you being needy?” You laughed.
“Only when I miss you…”
“We literally saw each other an hour ago, Kook.”
“I know.” Jungkook grinned cutely at you only for you to push his face away gently while you laughed.
“Hmm, needy indeed.”
“Hey…” He pouted at you. Of course your heart couldn’t bear to see his sad pout so you turned to face him completely. Reaching up with both hands to hold his face, you pressed your lips on his before pulling away to see his silly smile on his face.
“I love you.” You whispered as you felt him hug you.
“I love you more.”
That was the last thing you heard as Changkyun’s voice beckons your boyfriend over from a few feet behind Jungkook. “Come on lovebird, we gotta go… See you later Y/N.” Changkyun chuckled as he wiggled his index finger towards Jungkook. Your boyfriend gives you one last kiss before he jogs over to his older friend.
Maybe joining Dauntless wasn’t as bad as you thought after all.
~~~
Previous
a/n: Thank you for reading this series! Do check out my other fics if you're interested to read more of my writings! ❤️
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Taglist: @moonchild1 @danyxthirstae01 @helenazbmrskai @jenna-posts @pimentelssmile
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fanfiction-funtime · 3 years ago
Note
IM SORRY IVE BEEN SLACKING ON HYPING YOU UP
Anyway I’m reading through the Things ™ and wow
Can I request something? There’s an idea I’ve been pondering for a bit. You know already who I’ll ask for, I’m guessing.
What if the reader fell for Xiao in Genshin, in a state where they constantly daydream about him. Rather than working on scenarios and scenes, it happens in real time.
Meanwhile, in another universe, Xiao in a modern setting has fallen for a Genshin character- the reader. He daydreams about them in the same manner.
To the reader, their Xiao is a guardian yaksha, Golden adeptus, and doombane itself.
To Xiao, his (y/n) is something just as exalted. I tend to use a seelie, since they’re an immortal race of ancient and now weak gods.
What they both don’t know is that they’re actually meeting in those daydreams. It’s not just imagination and the longing for company, but an actual relationship with another person.
Bonus points if it’s some sort of soulmate au and they physically can’t find each other and eventually realize it.
I’ve never told anyone about this before, and I’m excited to see what you do with it! I might work with it one day, just not yet.
(Hoo boy, this will be tough, but I'm sure I can do it! Xiao might be a bit ooc as I'm getting his personality from wiki and fanon, as well as modern au [hopefully] gives him less trauma and a slightly different personality.)
(Also, I can't do sad endings. So a bit of deus ex OC at the 3rd part)
---------------------------
Your game
---------------------------
Your pov: the dream eater of your dreams
---------------------------
You are (y/n)(l/n), and you are in the saddest love story this side of the lake.
Ever since you saw him in that first quest you were in love!
You were just a teen though, so it wasn't real right? After all, your red string wasn't connected to the screen.
Well, your string isn't connected to anything...
Y-your just a late bloomer though right?
(Ten years later)
Your now in your twenties and you still love Xiao!
He permeates your thoughts like how lovers do, you feel an inexplicable hurt in your chest similar to what many describe feeling when they see their soulmate prior to their string appearing, not to mention whenever you aren't busy you feel like you're...slipping...in...in and...
[Daydream]
It was happening again.
It was like a daydream but more...real.
Like a lucid dream.
You saw your string, just like so many other times, and you followed it.
You ran and ran, turquoise clouds parting and making paths for you to find him.
Him..
You ran and ran, glad that atleast in some way your delusions can give you some semblance of true love.
You saw the..wait..that's not the inn.
Well it is the inn, but more modern. And there was a school next to it, and a small village not far away.
Another of thing was that you were in some kind of yellow armor, it reminded you of those baby geovisnaps from genshin impact(that are absolutely BULL-)
You went into the elevator, which seemed more ancient than usual.
And when you reached the balcony, you saw him. But he was different.
Instead of the Yaksha you usually saw, you were greeted by an equally shocked man in a martial arts gi. But it was him.
But different.
You reached out, and he did the same.
And you touched
---------------------------
Xiao's pov: the midsummer knight of his dreams
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(Clarifying: in this version Liyue is based on European mythology and aesthetic while Mondstadt is based on Chinese. So you are a fae hunting knight rather than a demon hunting yaksha)
Xiao had always been reserved, but what happened to him as a kid drew him further into his shell.
Abusive parents, accidentally giving his sister trauma induced amnesia, he felt the weight of his actions like atlas feels the world on his shoulders.
Luckily, two people took him and his sister QiQi in: QiQi's doctor Baizhu, and Xiao's therapist(and Baizhu's husband) Morax.
It was difficult to come out, even after Xiao stopped feeling so at fault. So he mostly stayed in his room and played video games.
That is until he met you.
Well met is the wrong word here.
He saw your character in his world's version of genshin impact: tribunal eruption
The way you used your weapon, the way your armor shined in the night as you rode to his wanderer. The smile you gave as he handed you (favourite food).
But most of all, the way you used fighting styles from so many martial arts and hand to hand combat techniques.
From irish kickboxing to karate, from assassination arts in ancient history of japan to systema.
It awoken two things in him: first was his want to learn martial arts and make his own.
The second was his love for you.
But don't worry, your physical attributes only drew him in. Your personality made him stay.
Years went on, he became a martial arts instructor for his own style, and moved into an apartment near a small village.
He started teaching at a school nearby, he even gets a discount on rent for giving free lessons to the owner's sons, Ivan and Viktor.
He's also convinced those two have a crush on him but it's pointless.
After all, he was a dream eater, a common group of people who have a strange ability to find their soulmate.
Specifically, the ability to have "lucid daydreams" where they meet their soulmate.
But he must be defective. After all his soulmate kept appearing as...well you. As a knight that would meet him on the balcony every night.
He assumed maybe it was your voice actor or designer, but neither of them have had the lucid daydreams.
He began thinking he'd never find his soulmate
Until one daydream...
He was on the balcony again, like a prince awaiting his knight to rescue him.
But it was different.
The apartment complex he lived in now looked much smaller, as did the tree it was built around, and the building looked far more ancient in design yet so much younger in age.
And the village and school nearby aren't there anymore.
Oddest change of all is that his gi he was wearing just a second ago is now similar to the outfit warn by the mondstadt demon slayer Corps
And when you arrived at the balcony, he noticed a red string, one that connected your heart to his. But you weren't wearing your armor, you were wearing casual, modern clothes.
He knew it was stupid, after all you can't touch your soulmate in the daydreams. But he felt compelled to....to reach out and..
You touched him.
---------------------------
nothing never comes between you, and nobody helps you get together
---------------------------
(3rd person pov)
He really did find it annoying, how often mortals would find themselves in the wrong dimension, especially when it's because the writer wants drama. And now he's written in to solve the problem.
Ah well, it's his job.
(2nd person pov)
You didn't know how to feel. You were touching Xiao...and you weren't waking up. Was this...real?
"You... you're real...different but....still the person I love...." Xiao seemed to be equally in a trance at the prospect
"yeah...so are you..."
The armor you wore melted away, and you cant see it but Xiao's fictional clothes melted from him as well. You were both equally real, in your own reality.
But you knew it couldn't last.
"When the daydream ends, I wont be able to see you anymore," Xiao said with a sea of tears in his eyes, "We've actually met now...and now...now the dreams will end."
You lean into him, "then let's make this dream the best one we've ever had."
Your about to kiss when-
"Terribly sorry about this!" A childlike voice called, "you know, interrupting your moment and all that. See for the sake of narrative, you both were put in separate universes. And it's my job to give you a happy ending."
When you both looked, you saw a child made of bone climbing into reality from some kind of hole.
"Now just wait a moment aaannnd-"
The turquoise clouds cleared, and the world rippled into a conjoined reality between genshin impact and tribunal eruption.
"Welcome to your dream world, enjoy eternal love!" The child said as he crawled back into the hole and it closed.
When he was gone, you both observed the world around you: a beautiful mix of aesthetics surrounded you, and both your armor and his adeptus clothing were on you both.
You gazed into eachother's eyes.
He placed one hand on your cheek while another held your hand, "I'm not good with speaking..speaking my emotions..but I....maybe my actions can do that for me..."
You felt your red string radiate with the warmth of love, likewise Xiao felt his daydreams dissipate like a haze leaving his mind.
You grab his hand and place your free hand on his cheek, mirroring his love, as you always have.
"Xiao...your very existence tells me all I need to hear.."
You both leaned in, and kissed.
Two lovers, in a dream made reality,
A paradise for all eternity.
---------------------------
I feel it kinda fell apart with the deus ex, but I think I scraped it back together in the end!
I hope it's good enough for what you envisioned buddy, I tried my best!
(Also I think you deserve something just as good as what happens to the reader insert in this fic, story)
(Tagging: @golden-wingseos (this is the writing blog for someone you told to tag you), and @storytravelled (just to keep the idea of tagging in mind))
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marveldc-imagines-hub · 4 years ago
Text
Subtitles: Episode 4, We Interrupt This Program
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Subtitles Masterlist
Summary: [Y/N] is still recovering from one of the worst migraines they’ve ever had and they have the scars to prove it… Wait. Those scars weren’t there before and they certainly weren’t from passing out on the sidewalk a few days prior!
Word count: 9,361
Warnings: Mentions of (not super graphic) death and mental illness. Also Reader being just a little horny on main, but what’s new; almost 9.5k words and they’re simping for most of them. Lots of dorky fluff and also talking about insecurities.
Tag list: @madamevirgo​ @ravennight41​ @multifandomgirl16 @cyanide-mustard​ @badasspolygenderfriend​
~~~
    In the black void of otherwise dreamless sleep, voices were conversing.
    “[Y/N] [L/N]…” one started.
    [Y/N] [L/N]. Age twenty-five. Born to Killian and Alice [L/N] in [city, state] but Dad wasn’t in the picture. No siblings, no living relatives. They wanted to go to school for botany but Mom was diagnosed with early-onset dementia while they were still in high school, so they changed their career path to neurology in hopes of finding a way to help her. She still lives in their hometown.
    “Oh, wait,” another voice chimed in, almost indistinguishable from the first, “I know this one. Oh, God.”
    [Y/N] was an Honors student, at the top of all their classes. A degree in neurology with phytotoxicology on the side. They took an internship in Europe one year and somehow found themselves in Sokovia. HYDRA was still laying low at the time, caught wind of them.
    “Wait,” a third voice, this one easier to differentiate from the other two. “They’re HYDRA?”
    The second voice responded, “Former.”
    [Y/N] had no idea what they were getting into. HYDRA, always good at hiding in the shadows; they brought [Y/N] in under the guise of an assistant job studying new forms of neural regeneration. A job that paid well enough to live comfortably and even send a little extra home, while developing something that just might solve all their mother’s problems? It was a dream come true. 
Fortunately for HYDRA but unfortunately for [Y/N], they were very good at their job too. They helped HYDRA develop all kinds of nasty stuff. Nanobots that changed brain chemistry, near foolproof brainwashing tech— They even helped develop special toxins, one of the world’s deadliest poisons. All the while, thinking they were doing something good.
“How is that possible?” the original voice asked. “How could they have been so oblivious?”
“One-track mind?” the second voice offered, “Plus misinformation on HYDRA’s part and ‘routine health checks’ with something a little extra mixed in.”
“They were tested on?”
“A victim of almost everything they’d helped create, except the fatal stuff and anything that would disrupt business as usual. IVs and shots full of toxins, nanobots being released into their room while they slept.”
The third asked, “What changed?”
“Wanda.”
[Y/N] stumbled upon Wanda and her brother by pure accident. They’d been late that day and in their hurry, ran through a wrong door to where HYDRA was keeping Sokovian volunteers for testing. The twins were the youngest in their group, [Y/N] was only a couple of years older and the youngest in their division. It was a match made in heaven, really.
“Try hell,” the first voice suggested with a scoff.
The other voices offered their murmured agreements.
“So they knew each other,” the third voice said, “Before.”
That’s when [Y/N] started pulling at threads and HYDRA’s costume began to unravel; their one-track mind had switched gears. There was something too weird about the whole thing, these Sokovian civilians had stories that didn’t line up with [Y/N]’s own. 
“And they believed them?”
They believed Wanda. She and her brother were just two more Sokovian citizens suffering at the hands of war and wanting to help their people. They had no reason to lie. They had more reason to be honest to [Y/N] than HYDRA ever did, actually. It was just a bonus that for Wanda and [Y/N], being around each other was like being a moth drawn to a flame.
[Y/N] may have been naive but they were far from stupid. When they figured out what was going on, they wriggled their way deeper into HYDRA’s ranks under their own disguise of loyalty. They became a full-fledged HYDRA agent, tasked with assisting in neural and poisonous weaponry. They weren’t able to protect Pietro and Wanda from testing, obviously—not that Wanda would have let them; she and her brother still believed they were being tested on for the greater good—but they did their best to stay nearby and keep the Maximoffs’ sanity intact for as long as they could. They even managed to save a couple of the other test victims by injecting them with temporary poisons that lowered their heart rate to the point of appearing dead. When the bodies were dropped off, the poison wore off not long after and some of the victims were able to escape. No side effects to be seen.
“I have a question,” Original voice said abruptly. “Why do we know this much information on one person? Like, this is some in-depth, intimate stuff. Why do we know that [Y/N] and Wanda had the hots for each other since day one?”
Second voice answered, “We’ve done extensive research on [Y/N]. The result of an investigation on the person who caused the apprehension of an entire faction of HYDRA after successfully poisoning them.”
The tests that were done on [Y/N] were not without their outcomes. They gained the ability to transform almost any matter into almost any other form.
“Huh,” Third voice hummed, “That reminds me of a series of disappearances a few years back. One house was replaced by rose bushes and another—get this—burned down because the roof had been turned to lava. Whoever it was, they either stopped on their own or died. What were they called?”
“The Alchemist,” Second stated simply, much to Third’s dismay. “And those were incognito HYDRA agents.”
After Pietro died and Wanda disappeared—not really disappeared, just left with the Avengers—[Y/N] had a choice to make. They were far too deep into HYDRA’s work now, the awful things that they had done were beginning to weigh on them, as Wanda and her brother had been just as grounding for [Y/N] as [Y/N] had been for her. After she was gone, they had a hard time dealing with the horrible business going on around them. So they did what they knew how to do; they mixed up a combination of poison and nanobots.
[Y/N] had fully committed to perishing with the rest of their coworkers but apparently, the poison hadn’t been quite strong enough. They’d made a miscalculation in a time of poor mental state and woke up the next day to hear that not all of the HYDRA agents had died either. At least the survivors had been taken in for the time being but that just wasn’t enough for them; they’d had a right to be concerned too because HYDRA had a habit of getting themselves out of sticky situations. This case was no different. 
[Y/N] most likely felt responsible for having a hand in HYDRA’s dirty work, for not doing more, and they must have felt even more responsible when they learned that HYDRA was a much bigger problem than they could have ever imagined.
First blurted, “Well, what happened next?”
Second answered, “They went after agents until they got caught, the only way they knew how.”
The second miscalculation that they’d ever made got them caught. The agent put a gun to [Y/N]’s head and pulled the trigger.
“So are they dead too?” First asked. The voice seemed to quiver.
The third voice hemmed and hawed a bit before saying, “They must have, with the way all this weirdness had been going. Oh my god, poor Wanda, not one dead partner but two—”
Second spoke over the other two voices’ rambling, forcing them to calm down and listen. “They didn’t die, though, they—”
The voices started cutting out like the dream was a TV program being interfered by a poor connection and static.
“—Found by—Barely alive—Hospital—Braindead—Westview—Find a doct—”
Suddenly gunshots sounded, one followed by several more, and the darkness cracked and shattered, revealing blinding light behind it. A silhouette walked silently through the wall of light; it was Geraldine—no, Monica—poised with a gun in the outfit she helped deliver Maximoff twins in. As she walked forward, crossing from a plane of burning white to one of void black, the image of her warped and distorted until it changed. Monica, looking much more modern, in a uniform that included a bulletproof vest and a lanyard with S.W.O.R.D. printed at the top, moving carefully towards a broken and bleeding body on the ground with another in a heap behind her. The image distorted and changed again, and the first body was sitting on their knees and looking up defiant defeat. The person they were looking at was no longer Monica but a bulky figure in a dark outfit with straps in the form of an H across their chest, the body that had been laying in a battered pile behind Monica just a moment earlier. The H-adorned assailant held a still-raised gun to the kneeling person’s forehead.
[Y/N] could only spit at their feet before another gunshot sounded and the image disappeared to black.
You woke up sweating and choking on your breath. Your brain, throbbing with a pain that shot through it like a bullet, didn’t register fast enough that you were standing instead of laying down so when you flailed, you threw yourself off balance and fell forward. Catching a quick glimpse of your surroundings on your way down told you that you were somewhere outside and that it was the dead of night. You tried last minute to brace yourself for a concrete-laden impact.
    You were instead greeted with soft fabric and arms wrapping tightly around you.
    “Goodness, [Y/N], are you quite alright?”
    You squinted at the striped sleepwear for a moment before looking up where Vision’s worried gaze and whirling irises were waiting for you; it took your eyes a moment to fully focus as the pain in your head faded but left a faint ringing behind. Then you looked around at your surroundings; not only were you outside but you were standing in Vision and Wanda’s driveway. Your gaze settled on a particular section of the house’s exterior where you vividly remembered a vaguely human shape exploding out of its walls. 
    You were standing in the exact same place you had been when it happened.
    “[Y/N]?” Vision said again, drawing your attention back to him.
    “Oh, cosmo, I’m sorry,” you said but your throat was too dry and you had to stop and clear your throat halfway through. Being in Vision’s arms, you were keenly aware of the fact that you were both in your bedwear and that yours had been sweated through. You slumped against him, partially to hide your embarrassed face but also because you felt like you hadn’t slept at all.
    “Vis?”
    “Yes, my favorite teacup?”
    You snorted softly at that. “You don’t even drink tea.”
    “Oh, I know,” Vision lilted back. Then he nuzzled his face into your hair. “I do like the patterns and the daintiness of them though.”
    That time you laughed a bit. Feeling his warm breath against your scalp and his strong arms holding you safely in place against him, you almost instantly melted into the embrace. You wrapped your own arms around him and pressed your face into his chest. “What are we doing outside?”
    “Ah, yes, about that. You appeared to be sleepwalking again.”
    You groaned. “Again? This is a nightmare.”
    One of Vision’s hands moved to run itself through your hair and down your neck. “That accident you had the other day certainly did a number on you.”
    The accident. In other words, that time where you walked off in the middle of a conversation with Vision, Agnes, and Herb to mumble at a wall and then faceplant onto the sidewalk. Not only was your nose still recovering but your mind and dignity as well.
    “The only time I’ve slept well since is when I fell asleep on your couch,” you whined. Then you lowered your voice and grumbled into Vision’s chest.
    Vision chuckled. “What was that?”
    You looked up at him and scowled. “The four of you are over here in your stupid, big, warm, cozy house. Meanwhile, I’m across the way, alone and uncomfortable, with only Bernard to keep me company. Bernard’s terrible company.”
    “Truly,” Vision agreed, grinning slightly. He loved your strange, cute, not at all challenging struggles.
    The both of you turned to give the lawn ornament in question a pointed look. Bernard seemed to glower back.
    “Well,” Vision said as he pulled away from you a bit, “why don’t you come inside then? Wanda’s up with the babies anyway. You might as well join us, especially if it means you’ll be able to sleep better.” Not taking no for an answer, the synthezoid was already tugging you towards the lit-up porch.
    You were too tired to argue and, quite frankly, you didn’t want to, so you allowed yourself to be pulled along as you admired the soft cotton of Vision’s matching pajama set.
    “Oh, my.”
    “What?” You looked at Vision’s face again only to catch him staring at a spot above your eyes. The porch light glinted off the gem embedded in his own. “What, do I have something on my face?”
    “No,” Vision responded slowly, “but you must have done something to it. You have quite the scar.”
    Your eyebrows raised. You moved away from him to look at your reflection in one of the windows and surely enough, you had a raised scar on your forehead, near your hairline. You gingerly pressed your fingers against it; it certainly wasn’t new.
    A seemingly random thought popped into your head. Is that… a scar from a bullet?
    “What on earth did you do to yourself?” Vision asked. Him walking up to stand directly behind you and press his hands to your neck, under the collar of your shirt no less, was more than a little distracting. “You’ve got one back here too.”
    You reached back to where Vision was touching and when he removed his fingers, you could feel a similar scar at the base of your neck.
    You thought again, Bullet… exit wound…? 
    Something about the dream you were having earlier called out to you but you couldn’t remember anything about it. When you tried to think about it further, the excruciating pain came back in waves and you had to steady yourself on the windowsill to prevent yourself from collapsing.
    “Huh,” you said instead, “I have no idea.”
    “They don’t hurt?” Vision questioned. “They’re not just… odd raised bruises perhaps? Welts maybe?”
    “No, I don’t think so. They don’t hurt at all, though.” To make a point, you pressed down hard on the raised scar on your forehead, watched the skin turn a few shades lighter before releasing the pressure and dropping your hand again. Under the thick, stiff tissue, you barely felt the pressure at all.
    Vision thoughtfully hummed, placing his hands back on the curves of your neck; you prayed to whatever deities existed that you didn’t make any sounds you’d regret.
    “Well,” your partner said, “I suppose that’s better than nothing.”
    A pause. Your eyes stayed trained on the window’s reflection, specifically where you could see Vision’s fingers gently cupping your neck.
    Then he abruptly leaned down and pressed a kiss on the scar tissue, missing a pulse point by a hair. “We should head inside then.”
    You had to take a solid minute to recover from the shockwave of tingles that briefly made your veins turn into lightning. Then you shuffled after Vision into the ever so inviting house.
    Stepping out of chilly darkness and into a home of cozy furniture and warm light that turned the entire place a golden brown felt like walking into another world. An extra added layer of comfort to the usually perfect home was the slight disarray of baby equipment almost everywhere that wasn’t the floor itself, most of which you had gone out and bought during the babies’ day of birth and all of which Vision and Wanda appreciated; somehow, you had prepared for the babies’ accelerated growing on a panicked whim better than the Maximoffs. Tiny baby blankets and stuffed animals were strewn about and each visible part of the house—the living room, the dining area, and the kitchen, although the kitchen was partially blocked off by a drying rack of baby clothes and swaddles of various patterns and sizes—had a designated Baby Tray. These trays, perched on whatever flat surface had been previously free of decor or clutter, held bottles, nonperishable treats, diaper-changing equipment, teething toys, a mini first aid kit for each, and other useful trinkets; the new parents had apparently completely forgotten that almost all their house’s rooms were openly attached to each other and that, if one singular Baby Tray was designated to the dining area, it would take the same amount of about five steps to get to it from either the living area or the kitchen. It was almost comedic, the number of baby care items that were laying anywhere but the floor or in proper storage because, according to Vision, god forbid something gets a speck of dust on it and have to be washed or, according to Wanda, one of the babies be without their favorite toys easily accessible at every given moment. The only thing allowed to touch the ground, aside from feet, was a playpen that now replaced the usual coffee table in the living room area and a play mat in the babies’ room with its attached toys for the twins to play with. A final touch to the hominess was the soft light that you could see streaming out of the baby room’s open door, and the gentle voice of Wanda, singing a Sokovian lullaby, fluttering out of it. 
    It felt like coming home.
    Vision stepped away from your side to clean up somewhat, picking up a few toys and folding baby blankets and onesies to move them aside in case you wanted to make yourself comfortable on the couch. Standing inside now, you could much better make out Vision’s dark blue terry robe over a pair of bright yellow pajama pants that no doubt had a shirt to match hidden beneath dark blue fabric. The yellow of his pants matched the yellow gem that was embedded in his forehead, glittering with an unused power that you had yet to experience and that felt warm whenever you went to place a kiss on it. Poking out from the hems of his robe and pants were perfectly human hands and feet, despite their deep red color that matched the rest of his body; you found the continued presence of fingernails when not in his human disguise—absolutely unnecessary to his design, he’d pointed out when you initially asked about them—weirdly cute and continuously felt the urge to grab nail polish and paint them to match either the color of the gem or the same silver as the plating that started at his scalp and trailed down beneath the collar of his shirt. You briefly wondered how far that plating traveled across his body before mentally kicking yourself.
    The greatest thing about this still-fresh reveal of Vision’s inhuman identity—aside from the fact that he was no longer hiding something important from you, obviously—was that you now knew that he wasn’t just difficult to make blush but rather he quite literally couldn’t blush. You wondered what else he could and couldn’t do, only to mentally kick yourself again. 
    I can’t tell if I’ve gotten worse or better since I’ve started dating them, you thought.
    Oh, your brain responded on its own accord, so much worse. 
    Shhh!
    Vision was still puttering why while you stared and inwardly argued with yourself. At this point, he’d cleaned up most of the chaos and moved the stuffed animals and now-folded blankies to sit neatly on the dining area table.
    “Vis,” you said.
    Before you could continue, the man perked up and looked in your direction. “Yes, duck?”
    You blinked. “You make my heart go rainbow-colored. Anyway—” You broke off into a laugh when Vision went flustered, his hands flapping about while he sucked his bottom lip between his teeth. “Did I win this round?”
    Sometimes Vision got into the habit of ending all of his sentences around you and Wanda with a pet name. When you had first noticed this feat, you’d decided to start doing the same, just to see what would happen. He noticed and began purposely doing it back, where he had previously done it unintentionally, and now doing the occasional back-and-forth conversation that ended in pet names more than punctuation was somewhat of a competition between you two. 
    Vision scoffed at you, picked up a plushie, and tossed it at you. “Not fair!”
    Being in the house that was beginning to feel more like home than your own, around your partners and their sweet baby boys, seemed to shield and reenergize you from the exhaustion you felt after first waking up that night. You caught the stuffed animal, a plushie of a wizard, grinned and tossed it back at him. 
    “Oh,” Vision chirped, catching the plush wizard again, “I see how it is.” He puffed out his chest and gave you a warning, albeit amused, glare, then picked up a couple more plushes. In a lower, sort of growling voice that made your heart leap out of your chest and into your stomach, he continued, “If it’s a war you want, it’s a war you shall get.”
    You yelped as he started in your direction and dived across the front of the couch to get some stuffed animal ammo of your own. He nailed you in the foot with a cream-colored bunny and you returned the favor with a plushie of a witch in a red dress after taking cover behind the playpen. Now each of you was standing where the other had previously been, with you poking your head over the playpen’s sheer wall and Vision slowly pacing around the back of the couch for his second lap. You pulled the playpen with you with one hand as you moved away from him and the two of you began circling each other. 
    Oh, if Wanda could see her partners now.
    “Oh, Wanda—” you started to stand, only to get smacked in the face with a blue teddy bear; luckily, it was of the very soft variety. You stared at Vision in disbelief.
    Vision stared back, eyes bulging, unsure of whether he should apologize or prepare for an attack. He was too torn to do either, though, and had to scramble back to avoid an onslaught of stuffed bullets flying his way.
    Still aware that it was very late at night, your war-cry was softened, “Revenge!”
    Then your attack quickly diminished, partially because you were running out of ammo and Vision wasn’t throwing anything back and partially because Vision was now floating off the ground and heading towards you, arms full of said ammo.
    Wow, didn’t know it did that, you thought randomly, eyes fixed Vision floating in general, before specifically fixating on the devilish grin he wore while doing so. He looked like a very handsome, well, vision.
    A handsome Vision, if you will, your brain offered. You almost snorted before remembering you had not yet moved to avoid Vision’s floating plushie attack. You stumbled backward and scrambled out of the living room just as Vision started throwing.
    “No no no no no nonononono—” You were choking between laughter and squawking as you got up and began running down the hallway to save yourself. “Not fair, not fair not fair, not fair—!”
    You ran past the baby room and caught Wanda mid-turnaround, saying, “What on earth is going on out there?” You reeled back to pause in the doorway, caught a glimpse of the babies in their one large crib, smiled, went to pant out an answer—
    Only to feel arms wrap around you and drag you back down the hallway. You started to shriek, then forced it into a startled laugh as to not disturb the babies, and flailed around in Vision’s arms as he lifted you off the ground. It was brief, though, because then your struggling caught Vision off balance and the two you tumbled to the ground. There, you both harmlessly pummeled each other until you both were out of breath and snickering, and you somehow ended up with his top half under you but his legs pinning down your own.
    “You can fly?” you bubbled. You grabbed his face and squished his cheeks in your hands. “What the hell?”
    He laughed and nodded, and one of his hands caught your own. He glanced up at you as he kissed your palm and replied, “Yes, just a little.”
    “Just a little—”
    “And his wife can move things with her mind, like the crib she just finished rocking to put the boys back to sleep, and if she has to do it again because of her partners’ roughhousing…”
    You and Vision quickly disentangled yourselves from each other and looked up at Wanda, whose face said serious but whose eyes twinkled with amusement and who looked no less terrifying in a pale pink, puff-sleeved nightgown.
    You got up and straightened your clothes, with Vision following closely behind. “I will very happily take over the next shift because I started it and I’m very sorry.” 
    “What? Nonsense, [Y/N], I threw the first stuffed animal.”
    “I threw it back,” you pointed out.
    “Neither of you better have thrown and hit something,” Wanda warned.
    You glanced at Vision for confirmation; you didn’t exactly see much when you were chucking plushies aplenty and then running from your flying boyfriend.
    Vision nodded. “Nothing at all, although I did make the evaluation that we do have a plethora of plushies and baby blankets.”
    “I thought I was the one who pointed that out when you first gave me the shopping list, but okay,” you huffed under your breath, then grinned with Vision lightly bumped you with his hip. “So, the babies having a bad night?”
    “Actually, they were apparently worried about you,” Wanda said.
    That made your head do a confused tilt. “Me?”
    “Ah, yes,” Vision nodded, “We fell asleep with them in the living room and Billy started crying. We woke up to figure out what was wrong and Wanda saw you standing outside.”
    Wanda added, “Tommy started crying shortly after I walked to the door with him like he wanted to make sure you were okay.”
    “Aww,” you cooed, peering over Wanda’s shoulder to see the babies. She stepped to the side so you could walk in and shuffle over to the crib, and she and Vision stood nearby as you crouched down to brush a hand over their little sleeping heads. You continued, much softer this time, “Were the boys trying to make sure I was safe? Are they my little protectors? My little superheroes?”
    Tommy gurgled happily in his sleep. Billy remained quiet but his head leaned into your hand.
    You looked up at their parents with big, awestruck eyes to see them leaning comfortably into each other, watching you with the same level of affection you felt for them and their babies.
    “Heroes indeed,” Vision said. He walked over as you stood up again and lightly rocked the crib; Wanda strolled over to join the group. He continued to the twins in baby-talk, “But no hero-ing until after college, my little honeydews. For now, leave the protecting to your parents.” 
    “Especially this one,” Wanda chirped, making her way over to your side and slipping her arm around your back. “They’re a handful.”
    You faked a gasp, “I’m a treasure.”
    “You’re a putz,” Wanda said simply, with a smirk and a light pinch to your hip.
    You gasped harder and stared at her with utter betrayal.
    “A goof,” Vision chimed in. He slipped his own arm around you, the final piece of your three-person puzzle.
    You gasped harder still— and almost choked on air. Then you looked to the babies. “Bullies! Bullies, both of them! Billy, Tommy, you must protect me!”
    Very enthusiastically, neither baby did anything. 
    “I’ve been betrayed yet again,” you cried, not too loudly, though. You slumped against Vision and Wanda’s waiting arms. “Betrayed by my own brood!”
    “Your brood?” Wanda questioned, quirking a brow. Vision was giggling softly at your other side.
    “Yes,” you whispered, looking at her with wide, distraught eyes, “My brood. My pack. My murder.”
    “Your what?” Vision said.
    “It’s a group of crows,” you explained under your breath, before slumping down farther and continuing your distraught monologue. “I’m all alone! Oh, the horror—”
    “Well,” Wanda said, “We’re supporting you very well a family that has completely abandoned you.”
    You flopped your head back in her direction. You were so far to the ground now that you were practically on your knees, only your arms and shoulders being held by Wanda and Vision. You traced fingers lamely across each of their arms. “So strong, those who once held me…”
    The married couple exchanged an amused but mysterious look.
    “Wanda, darling,” Vision said, “They seem to have gone delusional.”
    Wanda nodded sagely in response. “Clearly lost their mind.”
    You squinted, glancing between them. What were they up to?
    “To the ward with you,” Wanda suddenly announced.
    Then you caught a red glow by your feet, but not fast enough before you were swept up into the air on a cloud of red mist. You burst into startled laughter but quickly slapped a hand over your mouth so you didn’t wake up the children. Once you relaxed—enough to stop laughing anyway, not enough to not be freaking out about being magically escorted out of the nursery—you waved your hands through the red; it felt like waving your hands through the open air. The only thing actually felt was the pressure on the back of your body that was holding you afloat and carrying you out of the room, but when you tried to balance on it and move to a different position, all you did was squirm and twist awkwardly in the air before flopping back down. You craned your neck, mostly to make sure Tommy and Billy hadn’t woken up from your outburst, but you only caught Wanda, hands glowing red, following you out of the room and Vision trailing after wishing his babies a goodnight.
    You looked back at the ceiling for a moment. After you heard the nursery door shut, you asked at a normal volume, “I’m not gonna fall, right?”
    “Not unless I let you,” Wanda reassured you. You couldn’t see her but the teasing tone of her voice made you imagine her with a smirk. A smirk, narrowed eyes, her pretty nightgown floating around her, magical powers that she could definitely use to crush you if she wanted to and you’d probably thank her if she did.
    Wow, okay, I either need to confess my sins or go to sleep.
    “Why?” Wanda asked suddenly.
    “Why what?” you choked back, heat rushing to your face. Surely, she couldn’t read your thoughts…
    “Why ask if you would fall?”
    Oh.
    “Oh.” You started flopping around in the cloud of magic, testing the proverbial waters; you were being taken to the living area now. You heard both Wanda and her husband laughing from beneath and behind you when you settled again. 
    Vision asked through chuckling, “What could you possibly be doing?”   
    You suddenly flung yourself to one of the magic surrounding you, thinking maybe you would fall through, but the magic held. You huffed and laid back again but not before you caught a glimpse of the couch that you now hovered over. You grasped at the magic again, watching it wisp through your fingers but feeling nothing at all. “This is so cool.”
    Wanda’s voice was softer when she spoke this time. “You think?”
    You couldn’t hold back the disbelieving laughter that bubbled up. Suddenly breathless out of sheer excitement of learning more about the people you cared for most, you sighed, “Wanda, baby, you must know that you’re amazing.”
    Then you squawked as the magic suddenly disappeared around you, but instead of falling straight to the couch below, Vision flew up to catch you. He held you bridal style as he gently dropped back to his feet next to the couch, grinning—he very rarely just smiled, it was always a big, happy grin when it was directed at you or Wanda or the babies—and giving you a peck on the forehead when you stared up at him, doe-eyed.
    “Got my own Superman, too,” you said, “Damn.”
    Vision plopped you down on the couch. “Who?”
    “Comic book character,” you responded with a wave of your hand, “Doesn’t matter. You’re far better looking than him anyway.”
You shifted a bit to get more comfortable and watched as glowing red magic started swirling all around you. The magic was misty, red around the edges and glowing orange-white in the center, picking up the scattered toys from your and Vision’s scuffle and tossing them into the playpen, pulling said playpen out of the way and sliding the original coffee table back from its place against the wall, picking up any other stray blankets or baby items and placing them neatly out of the way; it also straightened out Vision’s robe and ruffled your hair. Part of the magic moved out of your line of vision, so you twisted to follow it and saw it taking the baby clothes off the drying rack to fold and put on the counter next to it, then continued watching as it folded the rack itself and moved it out of the way. 
Wanda was now in your sight again too; she was standing still, palms up with magic flowing outward from the red clouds around them, and looking around to see if there was anything else she needed to put away. She was also blushing, from you calling her baby or saying she’s amazing, you couldn’t tell. After staring for probably way too long, probably looking at her with the same starry-eyed, dopey look that a teenager had at their first concert or after a first kiss, her gaze flitted to yours and made a nose-scrunching face at you before finishing her magical cleanup and making her way over to the couch as well.
You slumped back in the pile of throw pillows behind you, covered your face with your hands, and flutter-kicked your feet few times. “This is so cool!”
    You felt a nudge at your feet and you raised your legs so he could sit, then did the same with your head when you felt Wanda’s hand brush across your forehead. When they were both seated, you laid your legs and head on their respective laps and the three of you settled into the comfortable position that had been adopted long after your relationship had started. 
    That is until you quickly sat up again. “Is that how you unpacked your house so quickly?”
    Wanda smiled and nodded. She rested a cheek in the palm of her hand, endeared by your wonderment towards her powers.
    “Is that you unpacked my house?”
    Another nod. 
    “And the magic show was real— Wait.” You scowled. “But all the pulleys and stuff.”
    “That was, ah, my bad,” Vision offered with a raised hand. 
    “Covering for him actually using his powers,” Wanda explained.
    “I knew the mirrors didn’t make sense with you putting your hat through your body!” you exclaimed. “So flight, super strong, and… not sure what to call that last one. What was with you that day, by the way? You acted drunk, but you can’t get drunk!”
    “I swallowed some gum,” Vision muttered, glancing away and rubbing the side of his neck. His other hand waved towards his torso as he continued, “It got all… stuck. Gummed up my gears, if you will.”
    Wanda rolled her eyes at the pun. You snickered at it.
    “I had to magic it out of him,” she added.
    Your gaze flitted back and forth between your two superhuman partners multiple times as you took in the information. Because you were sitting between the two, this involved the turning of your head various times, which made your head swim a bit. You almost wished that they were both sitting to one side of you.
    Instead of suggesting this, you settled your gaze to stare aimlessly ahead and said simply, “I’m dating two of the weirdest, coolest, most stellar people in the world. How the hell did I manage that?”
    “Charisma,” Vision offered, even though you and him both knew at this point how you’d weirdly creeped on him at the office the first day the two of you met.
    “Sheer force of will,” Wanda suggested, but you guaranteed she was remembering how, for the few dates you went on with them, you’d had to be reminded that you were actually on dates and that they weren’t just casual friendly hangouts. 
    You looked between them once more and then you wished you had suggested they sit to one side of you. Despite their steady, comfortable voices, Wanda was in the process of hiding her flustered face behind the curtain of her hair and Vision was chewing on his lip and couldn’t seem to keep his hands and feet from tapping away.
    “Okay,” you said after a moment, patting your thighs to do something with your hands. “I’m grasping that you guys don’t agree with me here. Wanda, go sit by him so I don’t get whiplash from trying to look at you both.”
    You and Wanda quickly switched places. You sat cross-legged on the couch to face them and Wanda and Vision shifted around to sit in a way that allowed them to face you without one blocking the other. After a moment, you waved your hands at them; the cheery air has since faded into something more somber. “What is it? Tell me why you get all quiet like that when I tell you, with evidence, why you’re the actual grooviest people I’ve ever met.”
    There were a few more moments of silence before Vision went to speak first, which surprised Wanda. She looked at him, eyebrows raised high on her forehead, and lightly grasped his wrist.
    “Vis?” she murmured.
    He sighed softly and placed his other hand over hers. “Oh, it’s really nothing dear, I promise. It’s just… Well, you’ve heard how the people of the cul-de-sac talk about us sometimes.”
    “Mean girls,” you grumbled under your breath with a nod, “the lot of them sometimes.”
    Wanda seemed to suddenly sag with sadness and both you and Vision reached over quickly to hold her.
    “Oh, darling,” Vision said, “It’s not your fault—”
    “That’s not true,” Wanda whispered.
    “It is true,” Vision said, and this time he said it with a fierceness that was familiar to you, whenever Wanda was being treated poorly by people like the Queen of the Cul-de-Sac, Dotty, or when Wanda decided to get down on herself. He grasped her shoulders tightly, squeezed them until she looked up at him. “Wanda, darling, love, I didn’t exist before I meant you. I mean, I did, of course, I did, but I was just this strange, non-human, non-machine thing that was just… kind of… there. It was you that gave me an existence, Wanda. You made me human.”
    Both you and Wanda stared at him, surprised. Wanda stared because she obviously didn’t fully agree with his opinion of her. You stared because of course, you were dating two of the weirdest, coolest, most stellar, and most romantic people ever. 
    Get yourself a man like that, you thought. Then after a moment, Wait, that is in fact also my man. 
    “And you—” Vision said, turning his head in your direction.
    “Oh, I’m next?” you stammered. “I thought it was Wanda’s turn.”
    Vision still held Wanda but also reached over to tightly grasp your hand and bring it to his mouth. “I just wished we could have confessed to you sooner. I just hate, hate, hated lying to you and now you’re involved with all this too—”
    The synthezoid with the English accent looked up at you with eyes begging forgiveness as if he’d committed one of the worst sins imaginable. You let out a hoarse laugh and ran your thumb across the side of his hand.
    “I’m sorry,” you said, still chuckling as you wriggled closer to your couple, “but as much as you might like to think you’ve subjected me to something I didn’t sign up for, I’d like to point out that I’ve been about a month ahead of you. I was here before you.” You felt a nagging urge to look at Wanda and repeat the last sentence, and there was something extra special about saying it that second time like there was a double and then a triple meaning behind it, but the way you both furrowed your brows afterward made it clear that neither of you really knew what those meanings were.
    Not yet, anyway.
    You cleared your throat and removed your hand from Vision’s grasp to place it on the back of the couch. “I moved into this town with no husband or wife, no family, nothing but a pile of letters and a new deed to a new house that happened to be the smallest in the neighborhood. My first week here I told one man in front of the entire night watch that I thought the joke he made about his wife was distasteful, and then the week after I tripped and spilled wine all over his wife. Agnes brought because she thought I’d be a form of entertainment and we somehow ended up becoming friends over a flask that she hid in a pocket sewed into the inside of her skirt.” You offered a look to Wanda again while you mentioned that Agnes never thought your “for the children” jokes were all that funny, though. “I’ve dealt with the comments and the rumors and the ‘what’s wrong with them, they don’t have no kids!’ People are weird and they’re mean and they’re fun and they suck. You want human, dude? You got it. If I was still bothered by comments that are nothing but a bummer, I think I’d be trying a little bit more than wearing clothes that I enjoy over the clothes that are expected of me, telling Dotty she needs to stop being awful before she gets frown lines, or, you know, pining over two people—a married couple nonetheless—until I somehow seduced them with my staring at them from around corners and just generally horrible, awful attempts at eye contact.”
    The married couple in question chortled at that.
    You used your hand on the back of the couch to hoist yourself up on your knees so you towered over Vision just slightly.
    “Here’s the thing, sunshine,” you continued, “I’m not in your boat on this one, you dorks, you’re in mine. I was here first and I don’t give a fuck.”
    Wanda gave a sudden laugh. “What language.”
    “Has he not told you about the time I said ‘Fuck you’ to a plastic bird in my garden?” you asked. “Multiple times? His name is Bernard and he’s plotting to kill me, I swear.”
    Wanda’s troubled expression was split by a wobbly smile.
    You threw up your arms in the dramatic fashion that you knew the two people in front of you loved and hollered—then quickly quieted back down to not disturb Billy and Tommy in the other room—“All this for my rambling putz ass to say, who cares about what’s outside this house! You two, and your kids, and I are the only people that matter here. Here being the house, Westview, whatever! Everyone else? Nonexistent.
    “Also, just to clarify,” you paused to wave your arms around, gesturing at the entire house, “Love it here. Love this shit.”
    You suddenly caught Vision’s slacked jaw in your hand and gave him a peck on the cheek. “This face? Love it.” You moved to peck a spot of silver on his skull. “Love this too.” You pecked the gem on his forehead and swore it glowed brighter in response. “Love this.” You pecked one of his ear plates. “Love these goofy things.” You pecked the tip of his nose. “Love this and the fact that you have it even though you don’t technically even need to breathe. Oh, speaking of which!” 
You lifted one of his hands with one of your own and tapped on his red fingernails with your other. You caught a glimpse of his face now that yours wasn’t directly in front of it and noticed him trying to hold back a giddy smile—and failing—while he watched you from underneath red lashes; your whole body would have tried to twist itself in knots under that look if you weren’t too busy swearing to kiss those eyelids and lashes too, at another time. Instead, you pecked each fingertip of the hand you were holding. “Love these ‘useless to my design’ things too. You know what, just speaking of hands—” You dropped Vision’s hand, which made itself to your waist as you went to grab Wanda’s; you were vaguely aware that you were practically leaning into their laps at that point but that could be dealt with when you weren’t trying to make a point.
When you went to touch her, she let you hold her wrist but quickly squeezed her hand into firsts before you could hold it like you had with Vision’s. She was looking away.
    You pressed a kiss to her whitening knuckles. “Wanda.”
    She looked at you, her perfect face distorted by a deep sadness that almost shattered your heart on the spot. She tightened her first further. The deep emotion appeared to make her slip back into her natural Sokovian accent when she spoke again. “You don’t know the pain it’s caused.”
    “I’ve done my fair share,” you affirmed even though you weren’t quite sure why. Then you kissed her knuckles again. “And maybe I don’t, but I know what good it’s caused, that you have.”
    Her face twisted into an ugly grimace. She asked hoarsely, “Like what?”
    “The first time I saw your face, I wanted to go to space, grab the moon, shrink it down—so it looked like one of those cool little lava rocks, you know? But prettier—and get it put on a ring,” you offered, then kissed the back of her hand and whispered, “and that’s after I found out you were married to a very attractive man too…”
    Vision snorted. Wanda cracked the smallest of smiles.
    You whispered lower, “And I may or may not have even been interested in marriage before that…”
    That time Wanda rolled her eyes; you smiled and grabbed her other clenched hand to share the attention with. You continued, “You’re also so nice, like so nice. You are so kind and care about what people think so much, it’s almost buggy—and bordering on self-destructive but that’s not what we’re talking about— And I sort of get it now, you know, but wow, making your magic show worse for the sake of people’s sanity? Wouldn’t even be on my radar.”
    Another little smile.
    “I’d be like, ‘Who wants to see me turn this entire table into a rosebush! Dotty’s rosebush specifically; Dotty, I stole your rosebush.’ I actually did steal a rose from her bush that day.”
    Wanda blinked and you noticed the lines of her expression weren’t as deeply etched into her face anymore.
    “That was Dotty’s?”
    You grinned and nodded, then kissed both of her hands. “Also, I love your hair and the way it perfectly frames your perfect face, and I love your little nose scrunches, and I love your eyelashes and the way you look at me from under them sometimes, and I’d kiss all those things but I’m not going to because I gotta get these stubborn, always-working, never-wanna-take-a-break, always-somehow-perfect-nails-having hands to relax before they hurt themselves even though it’s very clearly hard enough to make who woman who owns them do the same. Oh, I did I mention that smile—hoo, Wanda, that foxy smile…”
    Wanda was blushing now and bringing up her smile made it happen again, just slightly. You took advantage of the moment anyway and flung yourself back onto the couch with a hand over your heart. “Be still, my pounding heart!”
    Vision, who was watching by your and Wanda’s sides, laughed a bit. Wanda herself rolled her eyes again; the smile didn’t disappear afterward.
    You sat up again and pointed at Vision, now that he’d brought attention to himself again. “And I don’t know whether you heard any of the stuff this guy said! You made him exist? You made him human? What? You two also do this thing where you just look at each other and have a whole conversation, I don’t know if you guys know you do that or not. You do, though, and I don’t know if either or both of you are psychic but if you are and still love me? With my unhinged brain? Migraines and all? I wouldn’t understand, even if you explained it to me.”
    Vision offered, “Neither of us is psychic but anyway, please continue.”
    “Have anything to add?”
    “You’re doing wonderfully.”
    “Thank you.” You looked back and Wanda, noting that her face had almost completely softened now, as she was too busy being flustered to be sad at this point. You quickly scooped her hands before they could curl into fists again placed kissed on each of the crescent moon-shaped marks now dug into their palms. “Your magic rocked your babies to sleep. Your magic cleaned up all their and put it all in one nice, neat place. You floated me around the house with your magic and even protected me from falling when I was wriggling around up there; bet that was fun for both of you to watch. Vision said earlier that that was your job, to protect me, and while I don’t fully agree because I consider it the other way around, is that not what you did?”
    “I thought it was cute,” Wanda replied softly to the second to last sentence you said. She watched as you gave her hands a few more pecks.
    “So, you agree then,” you said, “that your magic protected me and also made me cuter?”
    She laughed and the sound made your heart soared, performing an aerial performance in your chest. She tried to wriggle her hands free from you but then you scowled and tucked them protectively under your chin.
    “Gotta say it. Gotta say your magic made me cute.”
    “I’m not saying that.”
    You shrugged and got comfy, laying your head in her lap with her hands still hidden. “Have to. Otherwise, no hands for you. Oh, did I not mention how good you are to your kids yet? You’re so good—”
    “Okay, okay, okay,” Wanda forfeited through a wet laugh. Hearing said laugh, your head shot up in concern, but the woman was smiling as she snagged your hands back; what she chose to do with them next was grab your face and place a kiss directly on your mouth.
    It was quick and soft and sweet and absolutely none of that prevented the fireworks that went off in your skull and your chest and your stomach and your veins that made tingles shoot all the way down to your toes. She pulled away as quickly as she had moved in and you blinked; your brain was still short-circuiting, like a robot—like a Vision with his gears all gummed up, and your dazed brain thought that was a very funny connection, so it repeated the joke verbally.
    Luckily, Vision was close enough to the level of dork that you were and he laughed at it with you.
    It took a deep breath and a head shake to de-gum your brain—if only Wanda could magic that—but after the excitement wore off, you felt sleepiness start creeping in and decided to make your final push. You curled a hand around both of your partners’ necks and brought their faces closer to nuzzle your noses together; they responded by each of them wrapping an arm around your waist and returning the affectionate action.
    “So, in conclusion,” you stated, which caused Vision to laugh lightly and Wanda to grin just slightly, “I love both of these perfect faces.” You kissed each of their noses. “And these funky, magical brains.” You kissed Wanda at the base of her hairline, then Vision just below his forehead gem. “And these equally funky, magical hands.” You grabbed the hands not looped around your waist and kissed the back of them. “And both of those babies, and this house, and y—”
    You sucked in a sudden breath to stop yourself so hard that you almost choked and you reeled back to the other side of the couch only to drag Vision and Wanda with you. The three of you tumbled into a flustered heap on the couch and over their shoulders, you could see early morning light filtering through the windows. This barely registered, though, as you were too busy focusing on the fact that you almost L-worded them on a silly, tired whim. 
    Despite the awkwardness of the moment and the unspoken words, no one made a move to remove themselves from the warm, cozy entanglement. One of both Wanda and Vision’s arms was pinned under your back, keeping them solid in place against you while simultaneously and successfully enveloping you in between them; your own arms, which had instinctively wrapped protectively around their shoulders in the tumble, kept them in a similar state. Wanda’s hair fanned found and covered the three of you like a blanket, and you were keenly aware of her breath softly wafting over the exposed skin of your neck from where her head now rested on your shoulder. Vision’s rested slightly lower, on your chest, and you felt a quickened pulse where his gem pressed into your neck, but you couldn’t be sure whether it was yours or his. 
    You stared past their shoulders and watched as sunlight shone through the curtains and dappled the ceiling. You tried to figure out whether you were stupider for stopping yourself from finishing that sentence or for not saying it at all.
    Then you felt a kiss being pressed to your clothed shoulder.
    “You’ve said so many things that you’ve loved tonight [Y/N],” Wanda murmured, her hot breath causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. “What’s two more?”
    “I—” you started, then bit your tongue again. There was something about saying that phrase that made you worried; you felt like if you said it now, the happy little world you lived in would begin to crumble, like it would all end far too soon. You sighed softly and said instead, “I don’t know how I would live without you.”
    There were a few moments of silence where you watched more sunlight filter in and wished you could take it back because what a way to talk a big game and then not follow through—
    Then Vision’s head appeared above you and he pressed a dizziness-inducing kiss to your lips. When he pulled away, he nuzzled your nose with his own as he murmured, “I love you too.”
    In almost the same moment, Wanda was mumbling the same phrase against your jawline. 
    Sleepy and hazy-brained you couldn’t do much else but stare at Vision like a lovesick puppy that struggled to say that L-word, then snuggle back down with both him and Wanda when they relaxed against you again. That seemed to be the last of what needed to be said, though, because everything was cozy and warm and golden brown in your home again and, one by one, the three of you fell into a deep, comfortable sleep.
    In the black void of otherwise dreamless sleep, you heard the vaguely familiar First Voice finish chewing something and then go, “Aww…”
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aerltarg · 3 years ago
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Maybe this is a stupid question, buuuuut:
I just can't imagine a world that Rhaegar comes back from the Trident, wins the war and becomes king. No, I'm not a anti Rhaegar, matter of fact I like him very much, I'm just can imagine how would Lya, little Jon, this whole affair, would settle in the capital. The norm that fics (at least those I read) tend to follow is to make Rhaegar:
1. A douche, paranoid and destiny-obessed king.
2. Completely incompetent, aloof monarch, that deep down has a heart of gold, but can't really be understood.
I mean, isn't he supposed to be a scholar since he was a kid? What's are your thoughts about it?
oh, yeah, i can totally understand this! it's is the whole point in canon actually, "the wrong man came back from the trident". you would expect a hero win against his antagonist and have a happy ending w his lady love but it doesn't happen. instead the subversion happens to them with rhaegar being killed by robert who becomes obviously a shitty king and lyanna dying after him. they were never supposed to have happy ending, they were created as tragic and doomed and dead from the beginning for the whole plot to start, jon to have his parentage mystery and dany to take the passed baton as the last dragon, prophesied savoir and the heir who has to carry entire house on her back now.
as for the realistic rhaegar wins aus that's the difficult question. tbh we just don't know enough abt their situation, plans and wishes. you see, e.g. in agot we can be right in ned's head and see his motivations, what he was thinking abt, what he was planning, what he was hoping to do. but if his story was told the way rhaegar's was i bet he would have his own crowd of haters and ~intellectuals~ jumping out every two seconds w their "hot takes" how actually all hints abt what rlly happened (ned being a good man w his own sense of honour, justice and experiences affecting him and the deal w cersei's children) doesn't matter and he was an ambitious prick, planned to grasp the power by being joffrey's regent and make his daughter sansa queen. (you can actually insert there any bullshit and still don't reach the level of stupidity of such "hot takes" this fandom loves so much lmao). also he would be blamed to the hell and beyond for being too stupid and not foreseeing the future and actions of other ppl bc ofc after everything happened it's so easy to say what was so obvious to notice. also they would say that the deaths of his men and horrible fates of his kids are 100% his fault and even straight up say he killed them lmao. i can rant abt it for hours so yeah. this is a situation w too many unknown variables bc it depends too much on actions of too many characters we don't know enough abt. the only thing it's possible to tell for sure is the fact that there couldn't be any perfect solutions since things got too complicated at this point.
such fics as you've mentioned tho are just a part of this dumb fanon where rhaegar is "too prophecy obsessed"/"incapable of love"/shrodinger's rhaegar both smart and stupid at the same time/whatever/all of this combined lmfao. the man was notably intelligent from the early age as you've absolutely rightly mentioned, his guesses abt himself being tptwp have nothing to do w egocentrism as some parts of the fandom would want us all to believe unless he wouldn't be so reasonable abt it and later on, after so many years, wouldn't have changed his mind and thought his son could be tptwp.
and literally fuck all antis that think you shouldn't consider prophecies that hold real power in this fantasy world lol. you know, aegon the conqueror was said to be motivated (or at least partly) to unify westeros by the prophecy and still got the treatment of perfect/maximum close to perfect figure of a leader everyone should look up to from the narrative and grrm. prophecy obsessed much, huh? i don't even talk abt all these parallels between him and rhaegar grrm put there not for bitches to ignore them completely! and i will never get tired of reminding that dismissing prophecies is UNWISE for targaryens of all people. the house whose story is built on the dream of young daenys and her father aenar that listened to her despite common sense (or what local "anti magic"/"anti prophecies" clowns consider to be common sense). targs would be as dead as the rest of dragonlords if not for daenys the dreamer. who else in the world has as many reasons to take prophecies seriously as them?
yet antis out there act as if rhaegar is one dimensional weirdo whose every character trait is abt mf ~prophecy obsession~. like how can they miss one of the main points so badly?? the game of thrones distracts ppl from the real danger beyond the wall, yk, the one rhaegar was aware of and meant to deal with. there wouldn't be such a problem if he became king and had as many years of head start before ice zombies apocalypse as ignorant bobby b did. rhaegar had to die just for westeros to sink in shit and our main heroes to save everyone to make this story more epic LMAO
so yeah, too many ppl portray rhaegar as this one dimensional robotic creature without any knowledge of what feelings are idk even for what reason. it seems these ppl can't read for real bc rhaegar was not only intelligent af as well as dutiful ("it seems i must be a warrior" but "he loved his harp more than his lance") but also. ugh emotional?? my boy had constant emo sessions w brooding at ruins of summerhall, sleeping out there beneath the stars all alone and writing songs that made all women cry. does it sound as someone who "isn't capable of love" lol? folks act as if he was completely heartless from the day he was born (bc he didnt play w other kids ig??) but in reality their emotional range is less than the one of a spoon in comparison to rhaegar's lol. i'm not even gonna address the horrible attitude of demonizing him for his implied depression, vile clowns never listen to themselves when they talk abt targaryens and their "madness".
tldr; these fics are mostly lame af and suck at characterization if they're making rhaegar like that lol. anyway his character isn't abt being a good or a bad king, it's abt being a would-be-king for characters in books and readers in reality to sigh over his tragic aura and pretty aesthetic abt how it could've been. however, grrm clearly doesn't write rhaegar as evil or incapable as some parts of the fandom would want to try to persuade others. realistically speaking in the scenario where he wins there couldn't be any perfect decisions but it's a territory of speculations on thin air and lit nothing more since canon doesn't provide us with enough information to rlly theorize anything instead of building biased headcanons some ppl call "analysis".
but remember what barristan said about rhaegar while practically watching him all his life, from a literal baby to the man grown:
“I know little of Rhaegar. Only the tales Viserys told, and he was a little boy when our brother died. What was he truly like?”
The old man considered a moment. “Able. That above all. Determined, deliberate, dutiful, single-minded.” (ASOS, Daenerys I)
“Prince Rhaegar’s prowess was unquestioned, but he seldom entered the lists. He never loved the song of swords the way that Robert did, or Jaime Lannister. It was something he had to do, a task the world had set him. He did it well, for he did everything well. That was his nature. But he took no joy in it. Men said that he loved his harp much better than his lance.” (ASOS, Daenerys IV)
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princecharmingmendes · 3 years ago
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Heart by Heart | Chapter IV | Raul Mendes
                                                 *secret agent AU*
Y/N and Raul have been friends ever since they could remember. And falling in love with your best friend can be pretty tricky and messy 99% of the times, add that to the fact they're constantly risking their lives side by side on the field since they're both secret agents, and the best team that's ever existed. Perfect recipe for disaster.
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Hi, this is the fourth chapter, you can find the first one here. This one's a bit shorter but I still hope you like it anyway. Please read the warnings on this one, if you don't feel comfortable with the contents listed on the "warnings" section, please read something else, there are a lot of other works on my masterlist and on the "fic rec" hashtag on my blog. Please give me some feedback and I hope you guys like. Happy Reading! 
                                              previous chapter | masterpost | next chapter 
*Word Count: 2.9K+.
*Warnings: cursing, jealousy, mentions of weapons (barely any), slight angst (if you squint). 
Please don’t read it if any of this subjects make you uncomfortable, feel free to check my masterlist for other writings. 
*Posted: July 22nd, 2021.
                                                  -*-
Raul was fucked. 
He learned that ages ago, but every passing day, it just seemed to get more and more fucked. 
Y/N was the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on, he knew that the day he met her all those years ago, while she was still a kid like him. And as the time went on, she proved him wrong every single day, every time he looked at her, in his eyes, Y/N surpassed her own beauty and taking her own title as the pretties one. Raul knew he was a goner the first time he made her laugh, truly laugh, throwing her head back as she almost lost her breath, he knew he would have to do it all over again for the rest of his life just to hear the most beautiful melody ever created. 
And maybe he was a fool, and obvious one for not even holding back whenever she was hurt or needed him. He would give Y/N anything in the world and he could be pretty reckless about it. Sure, Raul was capable of keeping it to himself all these years, even from his spy family and her, but Peter was slowly catching onto it and he knew it. There was a reason why Peter wasn’t a field agent and his not so subtle approaches only proved that right. But he honestly didn’t care, as long as he got to have her as his best friend and best girl, he didn’t give a fuck about what the rest of the world thought. He only cared about Y/N. 
So watching her progress on the ring (hell, having his ass kicked by her was probably the best thing that’s ever happened to him), watching Y/N taking part of such an important role as to plan the mission that would take down one of the biggest criminals on the world left him so proud. He couldn’t even describe it. Watching her sleep peacefully among his bedding, the glimmer of pure and utter happiness whenever she watched one of the marvel movies or ate her favorite cake made butterflies go wild in his stomach. 
And as Aaliyah would say, he was probably a simp for her. As sappy as that sounded, it was probably true. 
“Still with me, champ?” Y/N’s voice ringed on his coms.
Raul had to hold back a smile as Jack smirked at him on their watching point across the street “Always, doll, see anything?”
“Not really” she muttered annoyedly “think the package is late” 
“Oh, sorry the bad guy didn’t show up on the perfect time according to your planner”
“Fuck you, darling, before I forget”
Raul huffed a chuckle as he changed channels on the surveillance system she hacked the night prior. 
He was with Jack sitting on his apartment watching Y/N from the perfect window. The initial plan was pretty simple, Y/N would be dressed in casual common clothes, going through her computer on Genoff’s favorite coffee shop, to possibly catch him after coming back, so he could be used to some of their faces on his absence justifying new people around. Her undercover role was as a graphic designer that pretty much had a home office, which would justify her always being around that area. Tommy was the local barista trainee, summer job to pay for his scholarship, and this way he could hear some stuff and also be ready to jump and protect whoever was undercover there that day.
Celine was working on the front desk on Geonoff’s cover up business building, she was replacing the other girl that just left due to maternity leave, so it wouldn’t look suspicious at all. James got the work as an executive driver on a company that often was hired to transport Geonoff himself and his people, and Raul would also be on home office as a free lancer photographer, he’d be in an untitled relationship with Y/N which would be a good cover for them always being out and about together.
They would all be living in the same neighborhood, Peter and Celine would be living in the same apartment complex, which was just next doors to the one Jack, Y/N and Raul were placed. This way it would still be safe and pretty low profile enough to not draw curious eyes. And since the mission didn’t exactly have a precise deadline, they didn’t have a precise date to actually leave, so their flat was poorly furnished and decorated, filled with the ultimate basic things they could need in a month period. And of course, heavily armed in every corner and drawer anyone could think about.
“He just left his car two blocks away, think he might be just a bit behind your schedule, Y/N” Jack called from his place behind the screens she had set up the night before “Tommy, grab the cash register as soon as you can”
“Yes sir” Tom mumbled under his breath.
Raul inched a bit closer to the window on a spot no one could see him from bellow, watching as Geonoff himself entered the shop with two other man right behind him. Probably security team. He had to hold back his breath once he noticed the way the man had his eyes fixated right on Y/N’s table, before quietly muttering something to the other with him.
“Hm, excuse me miss?” a deep slightly hoarse voice caught her attention from the fake project displayed on her computer screen, Y/N looked up to find Geonoff right next to her booth.
“Oh hi”
“Why is he talking to her? He wasn’t supposed to just approach her!” Raul practically growled to Jack as the other just shrugged in response “fuck” 
“Dude, calm down, Tom is literally just across the bar and she’s a fucking spy, chill, she knows how to handle this” Jack said shoving Raul’s shoulder playfully, to which he just rolled his eyes huffing in annoyance.
“I know, I know that” 
Jack arched his eyebrow at him, a knowing smirk playing on his lips “Is this your way of admitting you love her?” 
“Shut up and pay attention to their conversation, you idiot” Raul said pushing his friend off of his sit. 
“I'm sorry, I just had to ask, I haven’t such a pretty girl like you around in a while, are you new in town, darling?” Geonoff asked leaning his hip against the sit across from Y/N.
“Oh no, not new in town” she responded with a giggle, trying to ease the nerves and slight nausea from talking to him and his half attempt of flirting “I moved to this neighborhood last month though, used to leave on the other side of the town” 
“Oh, was it for work? How are you liking this place so far?”
“It’s nice, I thought it was going to be quieter but it doesn’t really bother me” she said with a soft smile on her features “I moved here because I work from home, so I needed to get out of my last place cause my roommate was not exactly quiet, and my boyfriend said there was an available apartment on his floor, so it just seemed like a great opportunity” 
Raul’s heart raced a bit more on his chest when she referred to him as ‘boyfriend’, which was completely stupid. Y/N was his best friend and this was only for a cover. But sometimes his feelings got the best of him.
“Boyfriend? Is he here?”
“Oh no, I think he’s at work now, he’s a photographer”
“It makes sense, he has the prettiest muse at home” he added with a wink, which made Y/N’s stomach twirl in her tummy, this man is absolutely gross and she just wants to find a way out of this conversation “is he joining you today or should I keep you company?” 
“Tell him I’m on my way, sweetheart, don’t want this man any closer to you” Raul said through coms, Jack already grabbing his backpack with the material they had separated to be Raul’s cover as he threw a denim jacket and a pair of glasses.
Y/N gave Geonoff a gentle smile as she shrugged before adding “he told me he’d be coming here, something about the cupcakes being the best he’s ever had”
“Oh shut up, this is the worst excuse to get me to buy you cupcake ever” Raul muttered through coms as he jogged across the street and Y/N had to cough to hid a little giggle that threatened to escape at her best friend’s comment.
“Yeah, they’re really good, I think you’d like the chocolate one” 
“Okay, thank you for the tip” she said, quickly noticing the mop of curls clumsy coming into the shop, a big grin blossoming on her lips as she waved at the heaving figure of her best friend “oh, there he is!”
Raul’s eyes found hers and he could only smile, forgetting only momentarily that one of the most wanted man in the country was just beside her, he shook his head to gain a bit more focus as he shortened the distance between them with every step “hi baby” 
Y/N got up from her sit and was quick to throw her arms around his neck, as he did the same with her waist, planting a kiss to the crown of her head “Hi, honey this is… Oh my, just realized I never caught your name, I’m sorry, that was so rude”
“Geonoff, darling” he said with a smug smile on his lips, probably waiting some sort of reaction and proud of it.
And to Raul’s amusement, Y/N didn’t move a single muscle, didn’t give a single reaction, only offering a polite smile “Oh, nice name, I’m Y/N and this is my boyfriend, Raul”
“Beautiful name, suits such a gorgeous girl like you” he said, eyes on Raul waiting for some sort of response.
“Oh yeah, she doesn’t like it but I’ve always found it beautiful” he said softly.
“Well, I’ll leave you guys alone now, nice meeting the two of you” Geonoff said as his guards approached him with a paper bag “and Y/N, let me know if you need anything, I’m always around”
“Thank you” she said before pulling Raul to sit by her side on the booth as Geonoff walked out of the little shop “how was your day, honey?”
“Good, angel, got a couple of photos I think you’d like to see whenever we get home” he said throwing his arms around her shoulders, pulling her closer.
“You two are gross to watch” Jack grumbled through the coms making them both laugh.
Y/N turned her head to face him “you wanna go home to show me or you want to grab a cup of coffee first?”
“I think I want a bit of coffee, but we can order it to go, yeah?”
“Sure, whatever you want” Y/N said before sliding off the booth and pulling him with her, before stuffing her computer on her little backpack, which Raul promptly took from her.
“Come on, baby, can’t wait to lay down a bit” he ushered her to the register, where Tom waited patiently for them “hello there, I’d like an espresso please” 
“Sure, anything else?” Tommy asked as he clicked on the little screen.
“Do you want anything, baby?”
“A red velvet cupcake to go, please”
Tom nodded looking a little nervous before speaking up “the other man with the security guards left this note and cupcake for you, ma’am” he then grabbed the little pastry and a fancy business card alongside it.
“Oh, I- are you sure it was for me?” she asked in disbelief as Raul tightened his arm around her.
Tom only nodded in response “positive, do you still want the red velvet one?”
“I- yes, please” Y/N let out before almost chocking on air, gently grabbing the card that contained the business information from his company (that she already had) and a little handwritten phrase next to a phone number, the note read ‘if you’re ever looking for a real man, let me know’. 
“Someone’s got a crush on you” Raul teased trying to mask the anger bubbling up on his throat, but he knew she saw right through his facade. After all, Y/N knew him better than anyone else.
“Well, I feel bad for him, because I’m already taken, yeah?” she giggled at herself, lightly poking his chest to try and loosen his nerves a bit.
“Yeah, since I have you, know that I’m never letting you go” Raul pressed a kiss to her head huffing a small chuckle.
“Here it is, sir” Tom cut Raul out before handing him the paper bag, and he placed the money on Tom’s hand.
Raul offered a smile as he lead Y/N back to their place “Thank you, take care, kid” 
As they were crossing the street, Y/N dropped the cupcake from Geonoff on the sidewalk, making it look like an accident as she cried out an ‘oh no, I can’t believe I dropped it!’ before tossing it on the bin. On the elevator to their apartment, Raul still seemed tense and too quiet for his normal self, but Y/N decided to drop it, maybe give him some time to deal with today.
Just as they opened the door, Jack was quick to pull them inside, grabbing the card from Y/N’s hand and tossing it into a special bag and running downstairs, probably to deliver it to a team so they could take it to the lab to run some tests. Celine was stretched on the couch, a knowing look in her eyes as she signaled for them to join her. Raul went to the kitchen to grab a glass of water in complete silence as Y/N sank down on the soft cushions with Celine.
“What’s wrong with him?” she muttered quietly, since there were no walls separating the rooms on this flat, only the bedroom and bathroom and Raul was standing pretty close.
Y/N sighed with a shrug “No clue, maybe just didn’t expect the interaction to go like that, I don’t know”
“By the way, you did great, he even got interested in you” 
“Ew, no need to remind me, seriously that man is just gross, there’s something about him that’s just creepy, and I’m not even bringing up his criminal record” Y/N added grabbing a bottle water that Raul tossed at her after she nodded at him.
Celine nodded in understanding “Don't blame you, I think I would’ve punched him five seconds into talking”
“You wouldn’t last a single second with him talking” Jack said as he closed the door behind him.
Y/N and Celine laughed as Raul joined them on the couch, sitting on the armrest right behind Y/N as she leaned her weight on him. He threw an arm around her. 
“I think we should order a pizza and have some beer, yeah? This was a successful day, Tom’s gonna be here any minute now and Raul didn’t die out of jealousy in 24h, only reasons to celebrate!”
“Don’t start celebrating now, Jack, he might combust at any second now” Celine said with a laugh and Y/N giggled shaking her head, looking up at him only to see his serious expression and a light pink tinting his cheeks.
“So, pizza and beer it is?” Jack asked pulling his phone.
“I think it’s a great idea” Tom said as he climbed through the back window.
“Okay, Jack, order the pizzas and grab us the beer” Y/N decided and Jack stared at her in shock.
“Why me?!”
“So you can do something useful for once instead of gossiping” Raul said playfully and Y/N smiled at that as Jack feigned hurt with a dramatic gasp. 
“Well, there’s that and the fact that this genius idea belongs to you, doesn’t it?” Y/N asked 
Jack stared at her and nodded “Well yeah but-“
“Then make it happen, darling” Y/N only threw a wink at him and he shook his head, but grabbing his phone to start ordering. 
“Hey Tom, can I see the piece you brought back?” Celine asked without moving from her place on the couch. 
Y/N took the opportunity to properly face Raul since the others were seemingly busy, so she cupped his face gently bringing his attention down at her “are you okay?”
“Yeah, of course I am, doll” he said turning his face to place a kiss at the palm of her hand before looking back at her. 
“Are you sure? You didn’t seem fine five minutes ago”
“I just didn’t think he’d take such an interest on you so soon, I mean, you’re insanely gorgeous so it was obvious he was going to notice you, I guess I was just unconsciously hoping he wouldn’t” Raul sighed leaning his head against her hand and she let it slide on his face until she was able to curl her fingers on his hair “it’s stupid, I’m sorry, I was just being stupid yeah? Let’s focus on something else and relax”
“Are you sure?” she asked tugging on his hair a bit as he closed his eyes, nodding his head softly and she sighed “okay”
                                                  -*-
*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I’ll know.
*I’m sorry if there are any spelling mistakes.
*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!
*Hope you guys enjoyed it!
*xoxo
-🌙
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mcd-ms-rants · 4 years ago
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*opens tumblr*
*looks at activity*
8 notes??!!
hhhhh I don’t deserve u all thanks soo much <3
well u asked for it
be warned it’s super lengthy again
STUFF I DIDNT LIKE IN MCD SEASON 2:
• Right of the bat I’m just gonna say this season is a hot mess
• what is even going on here
• Why is Phoenix Drop so...untouched? Like yes it’s grown old with age but also everything looks ok not like burnt to the ground or anything
• I’m SURE Zane would have told someone in O’Khasis where he was going especially the Jury and you’re telling me that none of them care?? Not even Janus? His fave juror?
• If I were Janus I’d burn it down just sayin
• Why is Irene’s relic so glorified? I SHOULVE INCLUDED THIS IN THE LAST POST BUT WHY TF DOES ZANE NOT USE ESMUNDS RELIC LIKE WHYYY
• I don’t like how Irene has healing and everyone goes wow but we NEVER GET TO SEE ESMUNDS RELIC (I haven’t rewatched MCD in a while if he does use it lmk and ignore the above :) thx) I’m sure it’s pretty powerful considering in s3 Shad says “a spell by Esmund?” when he sees the protective barrier thing around the portal so it’s powerful and the Irene Dimension fight would have gone different with it
• Why does Aphmau act like a shit friend by venting to Laurance and then ditch him when he needs her most? Like you can’t just keep dumping your problems on him he’s got his own to deal with be supportive
• I LOVE VYLAD that’s it that’s all I have to say
• tho I wish we could have seen more of him and the relationship he shared with his brothers cuz angst time
• HOW is Aphmau able to disguise herself as Zane and WHY do people not question it? She has a different build and body structure, different colored eyes, two eyes not one, tan skin and some chest like cmon that disguise is fooling NO ONE also why is it normal for ‘Zane‘ to show up fifteen years after he was last seen? Why does this make no sense
• This may seem a bit much and honestly you’re welcome to your own opinions on it but I feel as though Zane should have had more of a role in s2. Hear me out. The way his character is written is that his untouchable status as a high priest is a big part of his character. It’s why he’s able to get away with so much shit. Removing that like in s3 ruined him (for me) and not using him at all in s2 seems like wasting a perfectly fine (albeit unoriginal) antagonist. Yes it would mean pretty much everything would change but yknow what maybe it needs to
• AARON. That’s it he’s the problem. In my opinion Aarmau should never have happened. Aph is a lord and doesn’t have time for a romantic relationship. Aaron is a broken shell of a man who definitely doesn’t have the time for a romantic relationship. They speak like 5 times properly and even then it’s nothing overly romantic (as far as I know?). I don’t think naming a child counts as romantic I always saw it as familial?? Aarmau ended being a one night stand that caused Aph so much grief and all through I was just thinking that it should never have happened anyway. They should’ve had a strong platonic bond instead. QUEERPLATONIC RELATIONSHIP. Imagine. it would’ve been so much better. It would’ve brought awareness to a community that is not always shown in the spotlight but is as deserving of it. Why does Aaron stick around after Zane is in the Irene Dimension anyway? Didn’t he say that he was there solely for revenge? Isn’t his part done? Why is he still trailing after Aphmau
• THAT DEATH SCENE THO. Zane and Aaron both die from some unknown magical thing. what is it? I have no clue all I remember is that Aph found it somewhere. someone remind me? I don’t understand why Zane was killed off in the very way they were trying to avoid in s1 I get it it’s been fifteen years real time but...it seemed so underwhelming for me. Anyone else?
• Ive seen a lot of people mention this one before but Laurence should’ve been Shad’s descendant not Aaron it didn’t make sense to me
• WHAT IS THE POLITICAL SYSTEM OF O’KHASIS. It’s such a crucial part of MCD yet we never hear of it at all. Since Aph is a lord it matters a lot. I can elaborate more on this if anyone wants me to!!
• WTF is the lore here. In ep 100 Hyria says that Irene had no children and in ms s6 flashbacks I see a child? Whose is it? What is going on??
too tired to add more rn but if you reached here thanks once again I never expected any of this <3
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