#its such a fucking coupley thing god they are gross

[mybraindumpsterfire]

… they have matching phone cases… good thing im completely normal about this

[rubyklaasje]

polycule dynamics of HDMI if you even care

(the conceit of which is just dont worry abt it. theyre still severed but free ? dont worry abt it)

hellyxmark - kinda just classic straight people who are obsessed with each other and fuck 👍 they annoy everyone (theres more to it but we'll get there)

hellyxdylan - so extremely comfortable w one another that they are always touching and taking selfies together and talking over people (this is a real video of mark or irving trying to hang out with helly and dylan when its just the 3 of them). they Also annoy everyone because sometimes it feels like they speak a language only the two of them understand.. frat bro homoeroticism (helly... is boy - in ways and a lot), their party trick is making the playlist, making out, and disappearing to do Who Knows What (participating in the most mean spirited and competitive game of cribbage and/or mutual masturbation anyone has ever seen)

hellyxirv - love each other but its the most platonic pair when its just the 2 of them. lots of deep talks tho. and art-doing. painting and going to museums and buying vinyl records and drinking black coffee and wearing leather. 80s metal. political arguments... watching a documentary and both immediately falling asleep on each other... serious love stuff...

irvxmark - GOD.... ok weird lil daddy/boss thing going on with them, the most Serious sex (There Is Crying), mark rly wants to impress/please him but also finds him too cringe.. but yknow... irving also finds mark cringe but wants to impress/please him ... basically their simultaneous respect/admiration And pity for one another is so overwhelming it comes out in weird ways but it also stays in in weird ways??? yknow????

irvxdylan - borderline platonic again... dyl gets irv to unclench, irv gets dyl to take things seriously every once in a while, and they have to form a strong bond against Markhelly, so they will do annoying coupley shit when markhelly are doing annoying coupley shit just to get them jealous and to stop for 2 seconds

dylanxmark - more frat bro homoeroticism. late night deep talks. poetry and wrestling and fortnite. threesomes w helly. helly and dylan teaming up to make mark blush all the time. its gross

basically the polycule is ([hellyxdylanx{mark]xirving}) yknow? to me

[thatdeadaquarius]

A TAG GAME?! :O :D !!

✨️💙✨️

♡ 3 Lovely Ships:

Soukoku (i just think theyre so ✨️silly✨️ & couples that are @ war r my fav so- 🥰) also i recently discovered MANGA soukoku??!?!?! like theyre literally

✨️🍒🍑🍓🩹🩸💀🔫🏳️‍🌈🚔🗡🍉🍊🍋✨️ <- this

EraserMic THIS SHIP HAS BEEN IN MY BRAIN SINCE THE YEAR THE DAMN ANIME CAME OUT, IN THE YEAR OF YOU, OUR CREATOR 2016 I THINK 😭 (sagau ref lol)

IVE LITERALLY CEMENTED THEM SO HARD AS MY GAY DADS THAT I FUCKING FORGOT THEYRE NOT CANON- i get confused when theyre on screen and not more coupley 💀 biggest comfort ship <3

Myself / the near entirety of Genshin Impact Playable Characters LMAOO IM A POLYAMOROUS SL*T IDK WHAT U WANT FROM MEEEE-

♡ First Ship:

Wow, back in ye olden days.. hmm... i wanna say Sasuke/Naruto lmao, I DIDNT REALIZE HUT I HEARD THE WORST NEWS EVER RECENTLY THAT IT WAS ORIGINALLY A BL INSTEAD OF AN ACTION THINGY AND THEY WOULDVE DATED 😭😭

♡ Last Song:

Labour by Paris Paloma! Im so fucking obsessed it just embodies the entirety of Feminine Rage I need- and how hard women work all the fucking time!

(Idk ig this is part of the template but-)

Live, Laugh, Love Hatsune Miku too

@fandangotales lol

♡ Last Movie:

Cocaine Bear!

Kinda cgi gory, mostly gross, sometimes i gagged 😭, watched it in theaters and it was so hilarious tho, the dialogue was like, super natural too! Like realistic jokes i would make in those situations lmao

Hope i can write dialogue that natural one day :O

♡ Currently Reading:

The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System!

I fucking love this light novel (AND ITS ARTIST?! I SAW IT IN A BOOKSTORE AFTER KNOWINF THEM OFF TWITTER AND WAS IN SHOCK-)

♡ Currently Watching:

Bungou Stray Dogs & Saving 80,000 Gold In Another World For My Retirement!

♡ Currently Consuming:

Some fucking stellar Boba teas from my local shop in town! I got a sort of strawberry frozen one with whip cream and mango jelly stars + lychee popping pearls And my quintessential Thai Tea w/classic tapioca my beloved <3

Yes... I am a fancy drink bitch 😔, now you all know my secret

♡ Currently Craving:

God who wouldn't I kill for some pasta rn, like penne with the sauce and the cheeseeee UGH 😫 </3

♡ HAHA IM TAGGING:

(no pressure babes!)

@mists-reading-nook (UR SOLDIER/POET/KING WORSHIP IS CONSUMING MY WORLDBUILDING HEART- I CHECK TO SEE IF U EVER POST ANYTHING/POST ABT KING BC ILY UR WRITING SM<3)

@lonelyrosegold (i just found u but i rlly loved ur background music about Linked Universe, which I also just found out about lmao)

@bk-4-trash-fire (the OG, the SUPREME, My Liege 😌✨️ ur actually one of the first ppl that rotred my brain over genshin sagau! Thank u for all ur cool ideas that i may or may not write an entire short story abt some day lmao! The Possession AU i made was partially inspired by you!<3)

@intothegenshinworld (new for me but awesome writer!! I cant wait to see more of ur stuff!)

@chocogi (UR PUPPETEER AU PARTIALLY INSPIRED MY POSSESSION AU! thanks for the cool content!!)

♡

@fandangotales & @undecidingfate

THANK YOU BOTH?! FOR THE TAG 😭 It sounds silly but ive never gotten tagged for these things before & i was so happy to see it ;u; !!

More asks answered/posts to come my fellow zodiac signs!!

Safe travels,

💀♒️

[thewritingstar]

Until My Heart Stops Racing

Pairing: Mitch x Mike (or Bitch as I like to call them, ya know cause Believe x Mitch.....nvm lol) 

Fandom: The Powerpuff Girls 

Note: This was a commission for the wonderful @lisathefan who gave me the cutest prompt and I know she loves her crack ships. I hope you enjoy my dear and thanks to my beta, Faxx for helping me! 

Word count: 5538

---

The car whipped into the parking space, dirt flying around us and I felt my heart rate finally go back to its normal beating. I looked over to Butch who had a goofy grin and ignoring everything he just did.

“Butch your driving is terrible. Now I get why you fly everywhere.” I groaned as I finally got out of the car. “I swear if Brick saw how you drove this thing... actually I don’t want to think about it.” I thought that speeding was illegal but apparently if the cops can’t even see your car, it's a free pass. And being in touch with the puffs might be a bonus we all have.

Butch let out a laugh before locking the car. “Relaxe Mike, what Brick doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” He shrugged and sometimes I wondered how he could even say that. Brick could kill someone with just a glance but when you are a superhuman, and his brother, maybe the effect doesn’t work.

Maybe I should ask Blossom about that.

The beeping of other cars brought me out of my trance as I followed him on the dirt path.

“Anyways, why did you drag me all the way out here?” I turned to see the lights and the signs. “The fair?”

In front of me was the entrance to what could only be deemed as a somehow legal way to make people shell out three hundred dollars on cheap food and even cheaper ride systems. Every kid wanted to go to the fair and, yeah, it was fun when you were five, but now that we had just graduated high school, it seemed more dangerous than fun.

“Yeah, why not?”

I glanced at him and he only smiled widely but something in his eyes had mischief written all over it. “What's the deal?”

He sighed and smirked.

“A little birdy told me you got heart eyes for a certain someone.” Butch threw his arm around my shoulder. “And as the king of romance, I’m gonna help you out.”

Theres always a small tinge of fear whenever Butch gets an idea. It either ends badly where someone gets hurt, usually him or bad in the way that we all get in trouble and the notorious Powerpuff Girls have to get us out of it. But this...this was much worse.

“Butch, what did you do?” I said through gritted teeth. He only laughed at me instead of answering and pushed up towards the gates.

“Relax. Look they are here.” He pointed.

I followed his sight and walking up towards us was Buttercup, Robin and Mitch. Butch let out another laugh, probably because he could hear my heartbeat. Fuck superhearing. Of course Robin opened her mouth. You tell a girl while you’re throwing up that you have the biggest crush on your best friend who wears dark leather, has piercings and makes your heart swoon and think that she can keep her mouth shut. But no, she can’t.

“Hey guys.” Butch waves to him before leaving me to wrap his arms around Buttercup and ignore the public by kissing her square on the lips. PDA is always gross unless you’re the one doing it, so I can’t blame them. Also it's funny to watch her smack his arm.

“Sup Mikey.” Robin smiles smugly. Little demon.

“Hey. Hi Mitch.” He gives me a wave and a nod of the head and I have to mentally tell myself not to blush. Stupid hormons.

“Come on you two.” Robin says and grabs my arm and Mitch’s and forces us towards the carnival’s entrance. “Lets go!”

One of the perks to being besties with the puffs is the mass amount of freebies. Buttercup swiftly pulled out a ticket for each of us and handed it to the ticket collector.

“Sweet, free entrance.” Mitch smiled at me and held up his hand for a fist bump.

I gladly returned the gesture and every time I did so, I wondered if he could feel the electric spark between us. God, I need to stop reading romance novels.

“Alright losers. We’ll see you all later tonight, meet up for fireworks at 9?” Buttercup said and apparently everyone already had a plan that I was not aware of.

“Sounds good to me!” Butch smirked. “BC and I are going to do coupley stuff no one wants to see and Robin said something about henna soooooo.” He looked at me. “Guess Mitchy boy and Mikey are on their own.” I didn’t miss his wink and before I could protest, everyone was walking away.

My mind was now racing as I tried to comprehend what was happening. I realized in this moment that the group had ganged up on us, well specifically me. Mitch probably didn’t even think twice as the group broke up but they were out of their minds if they thought something was going to happen.

“Wanna hit the rides?” He asked.

I take a breath before nodding. We turn into the direction of the ride area and I have to remind myself that he is just a friend. A friend. Nothing more, nothing less. I usually have my emotions in check but for some reason, they want to act up now. All I have to do is get through tonight without embarrassing myself or giving Butch the satisfation of him being the king of romance. As if that were possible.

The area is buzzing with so much energy. There’s little kids whining and screams coming from the various rides. The smells of corn dogs, popcorn and, oddly enough, waffles mixed in the air and I can’t tell if it smells good or not but I know my pockets are gonna be much lighter by the end of the night.

We get into the shortest line for the tickets and it's truly a scam that each ride is a separate cost.

“I don’t feel like dying tonight so I think two rides is good for me.” Mitch says and I laugh a little because it's true. Just watching the swings makes me feel like one of them unhinge and plummet to the ground but that's what I get for being a paranoid person.

“I feel you. How about the rollercoaster and ummm... the spinning ride?” I suggest.

“Sounds good to me.” He smiles and god fucking dammit, those damn dimples.

The line moves as we chat about the newest horror movie coming into theaters and how Mitch saw a certain pair of redheads making out in a car.

“Wait for real?”

“I swear to god dude.” He raised his hand. “Unless some other chick wears a big ass bow, it has to be them.”

“Interesting.” I smile and soon we get called next.

“Hi there boys, how many tickets can I get ya?” the older woman asks.

“Ten.” Mitch says and I reach into my pocket to grab my wallet, that may or may not have a photo of all of our friends and definitely not for the reason that I can see his face at any given time, but Mitch stops me and places the cash in the tin. “I got it.” he says casually and something inside me felt all warm and fuzzy as the row of blue tickets was handed to him.

“Have a nice date night.” The woman says as we walk away and I almost do a double take thinking I heard her wrong. But when I look over to Mitch, he seems unaffected by the words so I just let it slide.

The rollercoaster isn’t as grand or cool as the ones at the theme park, it doesn’t even go upside down but it has a good bit of hills and bumps to give some air time so i guess it will do. The only problem is that these workers don’t care and make Mitch and I sit in the same cart as these two younger kids.

After we get the bars onto us, the ride starts to go. In front of us the girl grabs the boy's arm and I give a small eye roll as we start to climb the lift hill.

“Babe I'm scared.” She cries and he wraps an arm around her shoulders and I’ve never been so jealous of middle schoolers before.

“These carts are so damn small.” Mitch complains. And it's true. The two of us squished in this together leaves no space for our arms. The pressure of our shoulders touching isn’t too bad but it's to the point it almost hurts. “Hold on.” He says and I feel him pull his right arm away from mine and throw it behind us. “Sorry this is better.”

“No, it's cool bro.” I say even though I realize that this boy really just made it ten times harder to breath now.

I can barely grasp my surroundings as the rollercoaster takes its first turn before the drop. I can see the ending of the track as we go down but the only thing my brain is processing is the fingers tightening on my shoulder.

“Holy shit.” I mumble hoping that Mitch doesn’t know how he's affecting me.

We let out screams and shouts as we go up and down, flying around on the track and I try to enjoy myself, I really do. Before long, it's over and Mitch reaches his hand out to help me up and I take it with silence.

“That was fun.” He smiles and I am really happy he ignored his moms protests and got that lip piercing. It suits him.

“Yeah.” Is all I can muster and he gives me a look before walking towards the next ride.

Luckily as we enter this ride, there’s more room. Only our knees touch as we buckle in the seatbelt and I feel myself being able to breathe better.

“Good thing we didn’t eat before getting on here.” I laugh as the lights start to flash.

He snorts and nods. “Robin would have blown chunks either way.”

The ride is a simple circular track with small hills. All it does is follow the path and goes around pretty fast. Simple but a classic. The music begins and soon we feel the cart shift. I'm sitting on the right while Mitch is on the left, next to the exit and he wiggles off his black beanie just for good measure. His light brown hair, slightly damaged from dying it black back in freshman year, is ruffled from hat hair and my god is it cute.

“Fucking love this ride.” Mitch smiles and it begins to pick up the pace.

Soon, we are at full speed, which is fine. Perfectly fine. Except for the fact that the gravity from the ride is pulling me towards Mitch and no matter how tight I hold on, I end up smacked against him. Shoulders touching and I can clearly smell his cologne. It's the scent of sandalwood and campfire and my god does it smell heavenly. Men just smell like nature and I am more than okay with that.

But Mitch doesn’t mind, because why would he? Instead he's laughing and truly enjoying the ride. I smile and laugh too because honestly, it's just fun to spend time with him. The ride is over faster than I wanted and we hop off, slightly dizzy and I walk a little out of line but he catches my arm and pulls me to him.

“Easy dude.” He chuckles and I nudge him playfully and ruffle his hair before he plops on his beanie. Goodbye cute hat hair.

All of a sudden, my shoulder is hit. It was a pretty hard smack and my body jolted to the side as Mitch grabbed me from falling.

“Look a bunch of homos.” I look up and realize that it's some assholes from our school.

Duke Jones and Mark Dalton. Some of the few people who actually try to be douchebags on the regular.

My eyes do heavy eye rolls and I want to scream at them but I've never been a confronting person. My voice is in my throat but Mitch takes a step forward, his hand never leaving my arm.

“And what of it? Really dudes? You think some lame insult is gonna hurt our feelings. You’re lucky I don’t just kick your ass, better enough I can call Buttercup in a second and have your bodies all the way across this place. Grow the fuck up and maybe don’t choke on your toxic masculanity.” He sneered and sometimes I forget that Mitch can be pretty intimidating.

Their eyes widened as Mitch pulled out his phone to show BC’s number. They mutter something before turning and rushing off in a hurry.

“You okay?” He asks me.

“Yeah.” I say. “Sorry you got caught in that.”

“It's not a big deal.”

But it is. It's not a secret that I'm out and proud. Yeah its cool and all to not have to be closeted, even Princess came out last year so its nice to know that someone higher up won’t pick on me, but even then, it sucks. No matter where I go in life, someone will be there with a flame thrower of slurs or anger for something I didn’t choose. As for Mitch, theres something about him being called gay and him not having a hissy fit about it that makes me feel safe. Uhh fuck.

I take a second to recollect myself and Mitch just pulls me from the herds of eyes that saw that fiasco.

“Lets go here.” He points to the hall of mirrors and for some reason it's beginning to get extremely hard to be around him.

But I take a deep breath and push those feelings to the side once again.

--

The hall of mirrors was by far the lamest thing the fair could have done. Sure, as a little kid it was cool and slightly scary but now, all of our heads could see just above the tips of the mirrors making it lose the effect. It probably would have been more fun if the others were there. Butch would hide behind the mirros trying to scare us before Buttercup sent some lasers his way causing them to bounce everywhere and making us duck and cover. Good times. However, it was just Mitch and me.

While Mitch was walking, I couldn’t stop thinking about those jerks just now. Of course everyone already knew about my preference but Mitch seemed unbothered by being referred to as gay. Probably because he's not some asshole that thinks it's a bad thing, I mean if he did, why would he be friends with me for all this time? He’s just a good person, that's all.

Not to sound like the coming of age kid, but I knew I was into dudes before I could comprehend the idea of love or romance, I just thought they were pretty to look at. Moving to a new city at such a young age was hard for me, not to mention the whole invisible friend that tried to kill everyone. But after everything was said and done, I did in fact make some friends.

The famous superheroes had become my pals and when Buttercup introduced me to Mitch, I think that's when it all went downhill. We became the dynamic duo and everyone always paired us as the best friends, which is true but...it makes me feel guilty.

He turned a corner and I stopped walking. All of a sudden I was lost and staring at a mirror. Just me in my beat up sneakers and the uncertain face I seem to be wearing a lot lately. There's always a time in your life where you stop and contemplate everything, question all your decisions and how nothing truly matters.

“Hey you stopped walking?” Mitch said to me and I looked at him with a shaky smile.

“Sorry. Lost in thought I guess.”

“Care to share?” He asked and leaned against one of the mirrors.

I laughed to myself thinking about what I could possibly say. “Yeah sure Mitch, why don’t I just tell you that I’m in love with you and how it pains me to wake up to know that you will only see me as just a friend. Why don’t I just rip out my heart and put it on a silver platter for you to squash or just confess and kiss you here, ignoring all the states and hopefully pissing off some people?”

“...What?”

My eyes shot open and my eyes met his. He looked at me with confusion and shock. His mouth hung open slightly and it took me a solid three seconds to relaize that my dumb ass had just blurted that all out.

Panic. That's all I could feel as he stared like a deer caught in headlights. I could feel myself on the verge of tears and suddenly the air was too thick as I turned and ran, not caring about the employee telling me I was going the wrong way.

Mitch’s voice echoed behind me but I couldn’t stand to turn and look towards him. To hear the pure rejection and probably the disgust. Throwing away years of friendship for some stupid feelings? What was I thinking?

After nearly hitting my head several times, I made it out and ignored the weird stares and glances people were giving me. All I wanted to do was find Butch and get out of here and hope that I can just pack up and move away for college. Maybe even change my name.

Instead I found myself pushing my way into the bathroom stall and biting my arm to stifle my sobs. I felt like my heart was about to shatter, that all my nightmares where coming true all thanks to my stupid mouth. I was a fool to think that someone like him would even consider me as something more, a complete and utter fool.

“Mike?” A voice called and of course the sneakers peaking outside the stall belonged to Butch.

“What?” I spat bitterly. “Go away.”

I barely heard his sigh. “Dude, I don’t know what happened but suddenly Buttercup saw you burst into here. Really dude, is everything fine? At least come out and talk to us. Plus it smells really bad in here and there's a line of dudes.”

There's some truth to the matter and I wiped my face and pushed open the stall with a little too much force but luckily he grabbed it and just nodded towards the exit.

Robin and Buttercup are standing outside and luckily, I don’t see Mitch.

“Wanna explain what happened?” Robin asks as she hands me a tissue from her purse.

“No. I just wanna go home.”

Buttercup looks arounds then back to me. “Where's Mitch.”

“Probably somewhere and never wants to see me again.” I mumble.

“What?” She asks and looks towards Butch then back to me.

Butch raised his brow. “Mike, did you tell him?”

“Tell him what?” Buttercup asked.

It was at that moment that Buttercup didn’t know that I was practically in love with her best friend. Maybe Robin and Butch planned this together but it didn’t matter, not anymore. I would be losing two friends after this. Great.

“Look. It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t feel the same way.” My throat is dry and it hurts and there's no doubt that my face is red and flushed with tears. “I'm just gonna call my mom to come get me.”

“Come on Mike don’t go.” Robin asked and she padded my arm.

“You don’t get it, Robin.” I spat. “You don’t understand what I just did. Thanks to someone’s dumb idea, I now lost my best friend. And for what? Did we really think he would like me back? That he could even see me in such a way? I don’t even know if he’s gay or let alone into dudes. But who gives fuck? I don’t.”

Butch took a step towards me but my anger only rose. “C’mon Mike I'm sure-”

“This was a stupid idea Butch!” I yelled and at that moment I didn’t care what anyone thought. I was embarrassed and hurt. “I just want to be alone.” I pushed past him and the others, ignoring everything they were saying because it didn’t matter any more.

It didn’t matter that my friends tried to help something that shouldn’t have even been considered. It was just a stupid crush. Nothing more, nothing less. Hopefully by the new semester, it would be gone and out of my system…. hopefully. A stupid crush that I’d been harboring for years and titling on a scale of something more.

It wasn’t long until my tears dried and I found myself among the section of carnival games. All of the rigged and hard to win and if you did win, it would be a small sappy prize that you would toss into a garbage bag or try to sell for a nickel at a garage sale.

There were darts and guessing the weight of a small pig. The basketball tossing and hitting the giant hammer looked tempting but instead I walked to the game that no one had ever won. Ring toss. A game of chance and so incredibly rigged, it's a miracle if one prize is won in a year.

Without a second thought, I gave up a fresh twenty dollar bill and the girl working, who clearly hated her job, handed me the biggest bucket of rings. Enough to keep me entertained until I call my mom or muster up enough courage to ask Butch for a ride back like a dog with its tail inbetween its legs.

I thought I had it all figured out. I thought I could be okay with this. But I was stupid. Stupid to think that the boy I had a crush on, one of my best friends, would like me back, or even be into dudes for that matter. But no, instead of having my secret crush kept, ya know, a secret, the one person who shouldn’t know, did.

I tossed another ring into the sea of bottles, the high pitched clinking echoed for just a moment as another was tossed. Maybe this was pointless. Maybe trying to figure out feelings was a waste of time because in all honesty, I never knew.

Like the plastic rings people pay way too much for, you jump and you think you’ll land on that bottle, secure the prize and show everyone up. Prove that you can do the impossible.

But then you miss and reality comes back. The bucket dwindles down and soon you’re left with nothing but regret for trying and shorting eight bucks.

“Hey.”

I turned, of course he would follow me. Why wouldn’t he? He was probably here just to tell me to let it go and sweep it under the rug, and say it's not weird when it totally is. Or he was going to come out and say that maybe our friendship has come to its expiration date.

“Oh. Hey.” I threw another one, missing again.

I tried not to care as he stood next to me but I passed him the bucket and he took his own shot, missing, just like me.

“Have you been crying?” He asked and there was no way around it.

“Yep.” I popped the p and threw another ring. “Look Mitch, I’m sorry what I said-”

“Don’t be.”.

Oh

“Most guys would just push someone like me away if that happened.”

He hummed and tossed a ring, missing. “Well, I’m not like most guys and I thought that was pretty clear. Especially after those jerks. I value your friendship too much to get worried or upset.”

I looked over at him, and that in itself was a mistake, because it would be just my luck that the other carnival games with their bright flashing lights would surround him and make it seem like he was glowing. The lights soften his features, a small twinkle on the black orb of his earring and making those very so light freckles appear.

Almost like a painting hung up in a museum. You think the trip is boring, and for the most part it is. A few interesting things here and there but just as you are about to leave, you find a room you hadn’t explored. It could be nothing and you could leave, forgetting everything in the last three hours and moving on with your life.

Or it could be life changing. As if when you walked in there, the most captivating painting was on that wall and you wonder how you skipped it in the first place. You stare at it, taking in the picture itself and the meaning. Stepping closer and looking at the paint strokes, the time taken to make this is clear and it's full of questions and mystery. The small plaque on the wall fails to answer.

He picked up the last ring. It twirled in his fingertips unsure of where to go.

“I kept thinking, you know.” He said. “I remember watching a show, a random cartoon and an ad for a pride festival popped up. I thought nothing of it, didn’t know what it meant at the time but my father did. He was outraged and changed the channel, screamed and shouted saying that if his son ever was caught doing something like that…” Mitch paused and closed his palm.

I could see the hurt in his eyes as he sighed.

“Then he would have no son. So when I found out what it all meant and learned about myself....I thought it would be best to never act on it. No matter how much I wanted to look towards another guy, I couldn’t.”

“I’m sorry Mitch, I didn’t know.” And it was the truth. I wanted to mentally slap myself for not realizing that he was, in fact, gay as well. Way to go Mike, your gay-dar is broken. But then again, you can’t just tell a sexuality clear as day. I can’t blame him for hiding it, after everything with his dad.

He sighed again. “But when you told me that. Told me you wanted me, I think I started to realize that I would rather have something I want no matter what others think of me. I envy how you can just come out and be proud, as you should, but I wish I was that brave instead of a coward.”

“Mitch.” I slid my hand on top of his cautiously. He didn’t flinch or have any indication of pulling away. “I’m scared every day. Scared that someone might yell something offensive or even try to hurt me. Just like those assholes did earlier.But I can’t stop those things from happening but I can choose to not let them affect me. It's hard but you know you’re surrounded by people who care about you. Plus your best friend is an actual superhero.”

“I know, I’m sorry. You probably don’t want to date such a fuck up like me.”

Fuck up? Did this boy really think that?

“I would never see you as that.” I said honestly. “It's normal for us to have conflicting feelings when someone in our life isn't supportive. It's never gonna be a walk in the park or smooth sailing but when you're with someone who cares about you, it makes it easier.”

He sighed for the hundredth time. It was clear the gears in his mind were running at full steam and he looked at the ring in his hand then to the bottles.

“I guess you’re right Mike. I guess I was thrown off that the dude I've liked since kindergarten likes me back.” He looked towards me and tossed the ring, not bothering to pay attention. “I just hope you haven't changed you mind-”

The next thing I know, my hand is tugging on his worn leather collar and his lips are pressed to mine.

I never thought that my first kiss would be as enchanting as this. You always think it's magical and fulfilling but in reality it's probably a mess of lips that don’t move quite as well and somehow there's a tongue doing whatever it wants. I guess I can’t count this as my first kiss because Robin had peaked me on the lips in third grade, also giving me the clear sexual awakening of how I never want another woman to come near me again, but this was different.

He tasted like cotton candy which I should find gross and oddly weird but I didn’t mind one bit. At the beginning there was a bit of hesitation, or maybe he was caught off guard since I did interrupt him but I couldn’t help myself. Stupid hormones. He wasted no time kissing me back and I even felt a hand on my waist pulling towards him. Although it lasted only a few mere seconds, it was like a lifetime of waiting had lifted.

When we pulled apart, loud speakers and alarms went off above us. I looked towards the game, I noticed one single plastic ring was stuck on the bottle. The worker smiled at us before nodding.

“Wow, I can’t believe you made it, especially without looking.” She said and I looked to Mitch who just shrugged.

“What? You kissed me, I just threw it.” He smiled brightly and I hugged him.

“So what will it be?” I asked him and he turned towards the prizes.

“Well, what about that dinosaur?”

“I love dinosaurs.”

Mitch smiled. “I know.”

The worker used a ladder to climb and retrieve the massive blue dinosaur prize. As a kid, i used to dream of winning such a cool thing but know, I think I got something better. Mitch handed it to me with a blush and I looked at it with just as much pink on my cheeks.

“Ya know.” Mitch started. “I have enough tickets for one last ride. Maybe the ferris wheel?”

“That sounds good.” He reached out his hand and I took it. Before I could blink, I felt his lips press against my cheek.

“I don’t like to see you cry.” He said.

I simply hummed and we walked hand in hand to the ferris wheel before deciding to give the prize to some kids. He handed the tickets to the worker as we climbed into the cart and began to go up. He threw his arm over my shoulder like he did on the rollercoaster, but this time, I leaned against him and let those emotions I tried to keep at bay, run wild.

“I’m really glad Butch dragged me here.” I said honestly and Mitch only laughed and silenced me with his lips pressed against mine.

“Me too.”

When we pulled apart, a few questions still lingered in my mind.

“You mean, you’ve liked me this entire time? And you knew I was gay?” I asked hesitantly. It wasn’t a secret, the last part at least.

He scratched the back of his neck, a nervous tick he's had since he was little. “I mean I wasn’t hundred percent sure, I thought maybe it was a one time thing or just happened occasionally. But as we got older, more specifically high school, I think that's when it hit me.” He sighed. “All I knew was that I wanted to be with you until my heart stopped racing.”

His eyes met mine. I’ve always hated when people didn’t see the beauty in brown eyes. They think they are dull and lifeless, only one hue but that's far from the truth. Mitch’s eyes had spots of gold and a slight tint of green, breathtaking to say the least.

“I mean it’s a shame we spent our high school years just as friends.” My hand went on top of his. “But I’d rather have you as my friend instead of losing you so I understand. But what about your dad? Will be okay with us dating-or well I assume we should-”

“I don’t care about his opinion of us. Plus we would be idiots not to date at this point. If he doesn’t accept. That's his loss not mine.” His gaze went to the sky where a firework exploded.

The colors lit up in the sky and we realized we got lucky as our cart stopped at the very top. It felt unreal to be sitting next to my best friend and now, boyfriend. There's always moments in your life that you feel like were meant to be. Maybe it's the career you chose or the person you marry. Milestones that are already set in stone and fate just happens to bring you together, all that stuff. And as I looked at him through heavy lashes I thought that maybe, just maybe, the stars aligned on this one.

That or I would have to admit that Butch is the king of romance, even though he did literally nothing today and this was all me. Either way, Mikey boy’s got a man.

--

I hope you enjoyed love!!

[malakhai-ozera]

Oh, Christmas Tree 🎄 || Khoman

Discord text thread featuring: Khai Ozera and Roman Beckett​

When: December 8th 2020

Mentions: ​Landon Davies

Description: Khai and Roman get drunk and put up their Christmas tree.

Trigger Warnings: - Feels ���

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ “Oh Christmas Treeee, Oh Christmas Treeee!!! I really don’t knoooooww the words to thee!” Roman sang out as he pulled the cookies from the oven, far from burnt since Khai had been the one closely watching the time. “These smell fabulous.” Of course Ro had on a nice green Christmas sweater, only underwear paired with it, and Santa sock booties. It was definitely a fashion statement, but at least this time he didn’t feel like he had to wear an apron. “Baaaaaabe!” He called out while reaching for his wine glass, and stumbling with it over to the counter so he could get yet another refill. They were both already buzzed, and enjoying some Christmas music while putting up their first tree together. Exciting. Ornaments were next after they tried some cookies.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ Khai could hear Roman singing from the living room and he laughed to himself. God, how was this man this adorable all the time? His smile was stretched from ear to ear as he placed their box of ornaments onto the couch and headed to the kitchen. His Santa hat sliding down on his head practically covering his eyes as he pushed up the sleeves on his red candy cane sweater. God, they were so gross, but they just had to be festive. “Yes, love?” he grinned as he saw Roman practically gliding across the kitchen into the counter for more wine. “Those smell delicious” he chuckled. Making his way over to his roommate and booping his nose before leaning against the counter to keep himself sturdy. “Should we cheers to our first tree together?” he asked. Looking around for a moment to try and find his glass. “Ah, shit. I forgot my glass” he laughed. Pushing off the counter and stumbling to the living room to grab his glass before coming back and crashing into Roman with a giggle. “Okay. I’m ready” he laughed again.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman sat his wine back down while Khai ran to get his own glass, using the opportunity to start waving a place mat over the tray of cookies in and attempt to cool them off. He then took a spatula, and moved them one by one to a plate so they could firm up. “Okay, okay — I’m ready as well.” Roman nodded, and then grabbed his glass to hold it up in Khai’s direction. “To us, our amazing apartment, our friendship, and our first tree.” Roman toasted with a wide smile, looking into the other male’s eyes while he clinked their glasses together, and then took another sip of the dark liquid. “Okay. Wanna try a cookie??” The taller asked, full of excitement.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ There was no way he was ever gonna be able to stop smiling, not tonight. He had been so excited for this all day, and now that they were finally doing it. He was just so ecstatic. Lifting his glass he clinked it to Roman’s with a nod. “I couldn’t have said it better myself, babe” he beamed. Sipping from his glass before nodding his head again. “Mmm, yes. They look so good.. and look at you getting them all set up.” His cheeks were actually starting to hurt from how much he was smiling, but luckily the wine kept him from caring. His hand moving to rub the center of Roman’s back as the other sat down his glass and reached for a cookie. “You want the first bite?” he asked. Holding the cookie out toward Roman’s lips before licking his own as he watched him.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman let out a low moan of satisfaction when he felt Khai start to rub his lower back. God, that felt nice, and the smaller knew it too. After all, he had to live with Ro complaining about his back pretty consistently anyway. The actor smirked when he was offered the first bite of cookie, eyes darting from Khai’s caramel colored eyes, down to the baked good by his lips. These were pretty strong in THC, they really only needed half per person, but Roman leaned in to take a giant bite anyway, throwing a tight lipped grin as he chewed away with a happy hum.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ Listen. Khai absolutely loved making Roman feel good. In fact, he got highly jealous when he wasn’t the one doing so. Which only made him want to pamper and take care of his roommate even more. His fingers rubbing small tender circles along Roman’s spine as he watched him take a bite of the cookie. “Is it good?” he asked, lifting his brow curiously as he licked his lips. Just hearing the way Roman hummed was enough incentive for him to pop the remainder of the cookie straight into his mouth though. Damn, that was good! His whole body felt so giddy, but maybe that was just because he was with Roman. How could he not be giddy in his presence? He leaned forward and pressed a soft peck to Roman’s lips and then picked up his glass of wine again. “Come on, baby. Let’s go decorate the tree” he smiled. Lacing their hands together and leading him into the living room.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ "So good." Roman admitted while chewing slowly, giving Khai a tight lipped grin as he swallowed his bite, and watched his roommate eat the rest of it. That really shouldn't be something that was attractive...watching someone eat, but alas, Ro felt extremely hot just from observing things entering Khai's mouth. God, that was weird to say out loud, wasn't it? The taller smiled when he was given a quick kiss, and then followed his lover back to the Christmas tree, ready now to finish decorating with both of the combined ornaments they'd managed to find tucked away in their storage boxes in the hall closet. "God, I haven't seen so many of these in so long. I've moved around so much, I haven't really been able to do a tree." He admitted while opening his box of old ornaments, and pulled out one Landon had made him in grade school. It actually made him tear up a bit, remembering that this had been his first gift from a friend, one he had desperately tried so hard to take good care of.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ This was such a coupley thing for them to be doing. Decorating a Christmas tree together and sharing their old memories. It warmed Khai’s heart to say the least. It was like he couldn’t even take his eyes off his roommate as he watched him pull out the first ornament. “I know, it’s been so long for me too. I mean, my dad always put one up for my sisters. But he never let me help” he shrugged. Then after getting kicked out at sixteen everything just seemed to go downhill from there. His eyes lit up as he watched Roman though, and he offered him a genuine smile. “What’s the story with that one?” he asked, pointing to the ornament in his lovers hands. Resting his chin on Roman’s shoulder as he stood behind him and took in all the detail and love that was put into making it.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman smiled when Khai walked up behind him, and asked about his ornament. He smelled so good, like aftershave, wine, and weed. What was better than that combination? There was a also a scent that was just purely Khai, one that made him genuinely want to melt into the ground like butter. That was cheesy, but oh so true. They’d both been through so much, and still managed to bump into each other, like a missing puzzle piece. “This one was made by Landon actually.” He informed the smaller, holding it up so that they could both see it better. “As you know, he was my first ever friend, and this was the first ever present someone gave me outside of my parents. I’d never known what it was like to really have a friend before.” He admitted before turning to smirk, and press a kiss to Khai’s cheek.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ Sharing moments like these with Roman  were rare and far between lately. So it was easy to say Khai was melting right into the tone of his roommates voice as he explained the ornament. A soft smile outlining his features as he felt the kiss being pressed to his cheek. “This one should definitely go up first” he nodded. Reaching for the ornament and taking it from Roman’s hands. “To lasting friendships that turn into family” he said softly as he turned to hang the bulb on the tree. Smiling widely as he found the perfect spot and then turned  his head back to Roman for his opinion. “It’s perfect right?” he asked. Opening his arms out wide as if to praise the tree having its first ever ornament on it. “I love it” he beamed proudly, before accidentally knocking the ornament off the tree when he brought his arms back down. “Oh fuck!” he gasped. Dropping to his knees in hopes of finding it still in one piece. No such luck though. The bulb had shattered and so did Khai’s heart as he stood back up to see the expression on Roman’s face. “I’m so sorry.”

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman smirked as he watched Khai put up the ornament after saying it should be first, nodding with the other male said it was perfect. “Yea-“ Ro began to respond, his mouth dropping as soon as the ornament did, watching as the blessed keepsake shattered on the floor. His chest started to rise and fall, feeling like it was becoming harder to breathe, even after Khai apologized. It was just an ornament, he knew that deep down, but it didn’t make the fact that it wasn’t replaceable any easier. “Fuck, Khai...” Roman ran a hand over his face, trying not to get irrationally mad despite all the liquor he’d drank.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ To be honest, it quite literally felt like someone had punched right through his chest, and was now squeezing the life out of his heart as he watched Roman’s reaction. He knew he had just broken his heart into a million pieces, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it. “Babe... I’m so sorry. Fuck, I’m such an idiot” he shook his head. Leaning back down to pick up the pieces and trying to piece them back together in his hands. “Look, I can fix it” he tried to encourage him. But it was obvious there was no way of fixing it back to the way it was. “See, I can fix it” he repeated as he moved closer to Roman. Reaching out with one of his hands to squeeze his lovers shoulder reassuringly. “Okay? It’s gonna be okay. I’ll make it better.”

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman sniffed as he felt tears start to prick at his eyes, something that made him almost angrier than the broken ornament. He hated crying in front of anyone, and now it was about so much more than Khai breaking something he loved. He was being vulnerable, somehow a level of transparent that he’d yet to be with Khai. He didn’t like showing signs of weakness, and the way the smaller was trying to make him feel better about this was even more overwhelming. Anyone could have made this mistake, especially Roman, who was the world’s biggest klutz, but he wasn’t thinking clearly. “Don’t.” His voice broke, lightly pushing the other male away, because he could feel his anxiety rising to all new levels. He was drunk, now also high, and he probably looked like a giant baby.

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ The last thing Khai had expected was for Roman to push him away. He stood there kind of dumbfounded as he just looked at his best friend for a moment. “Roman, it’s okay. I promise, I’m gonna fix it” he tried to reason with him again. His own eyes glossing over now as he could see the hurt all over Roman’s face. Honestly, he didn’t know what to do. He had never seen Roman cry before, and this whole situation was just breaking his heart. All he wanted to do was hold Roman in his arms and make it better. But he couldn’t do that, and now Roman didn’t even want him touching him. “I...” he went to speak again but just shook his head instead. “I promise I’ll fix it” he kept repeating. Pulling his bottom lip between his teeth to keep himself from crying as well. This was supposed to be a happy night together and here he was ruining it. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me” his voice trembled. Trying once again to pull Roman into his arms.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Genuinely, Roman could feel his heart breaking even more at the way Khai was completely breaking down in front of him. It was enough to snap him out of whatever little meltdown he was having to reach out, and cup the other’s face in his massive hands. Why had he been so fucking mean over an ornament? Clearly there was a lot there he needed to unpack, that he’d yet to really discover about himself, because he refused to look at it. Khai was the closest person to Roman right now, so of course the actor was going to take everything out on him. “No. Don’t be sorry, I’m sorry.” He said firmly, and then dropped his hands to Khai’s shoulders. “It’s not even about the ornament, I jus’...I guess I’m a little more fucked up than i thought i was...” he looked into the smaller’s eyes with an apologetic expression. “I was being an asshole, and you don’t deserve that.”

ღ 𝕂HAI ღ When Roman reached up to cup his face, Khai instinctively flinched. He didn’t mean to, because he knew Roman would never hit him. But his emotions were raw, and he knew he fucked up. He wouldn’t blame his best friend one bit for hitting him. He broke something very dear to him, and his heart right along with it. Once he realized Roman was apologizing though, he shook his head. “No, it’s okay. This meant a lot to you” he replied. His eyes shifting up to meet Roman’s as he continued to speak. “Then what’s it about?” he asked a bit confused. Setting the pieces of the ornament down onto the coffee table before placing both his hands around Roman’s cheeks. “You know you can always talk to me babe. I’m here for you” he assured. Pulling Roman closer and wrapping his arms around him in a loving embrace. “...and I promise I’ll be more careful” he added as he stroked Roman’s hair.

❝𝓡✮м𝕒𝐍 ❜❜ Roman wrapped his arms around Khai, and buried his face against the side of his neck when he was pulled into an embrace. He was so embarrassed, and wished desperately that he could just rewind a bit, and pretend like everything was okay. He was so good at doing that on the daily anyway, so why was he struggling so bad now? All he knew for sure, was he really didn’t want to talk about all the reasons he was fucked up right now, not when tonight was supposed to be special. “I dunno, I’m jus’ — I know you know how I feel.” The taller’s pulled back just enough to look into those intensely warm eyes he loved so much. “We’ve both been through a lot. It’s bound to catch up sometimes, right?”

[cosmicdaya]

my love | tom holland

{summary} : roommates/bffs to lovers au!

{warning} : just swearing

{word count} : 1.3K words

{pairing} : tom holland x reader

{requested} : its actually for my valentine @keepingupwiththeparkers! 

{type of story} : imagine

{author’s note} : here you go, @keepingupwiththeparkers ! i really hope you like it! i kinda wrote it in a rush as i was busy and it’s kinda short! plus, a big thank you to @dtftomholland and @thelazypangolin for putting in the effort to organize this dollar valentine! to all of you : HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

masterlist | be added to my taglist

➳

A sigh left your lips as you opened your eyes. You felt a warm presence beside you, and it took you a while to realize that Tom was sleeping next to you. The sunshine streaming through the window made his face glow, making him look all ethereal. You moved few of your best friend’s brown curls from his forehead and smiled softly. 

You shivered a little as your feet hit the cold floor. Looking for something to wear, you spotted a pair of your sleep shorts and Tom’s black hoodie. Slipping those on, you went to the bathroom to freshen up and made your way towards the kitchen.

Before you started making breakfast, you scrolled through your playlist to play your favorite song. As the mellifluous tune of Ariana Grande’s Imagine played through your shared apartment, you prepared the ingredients needed to make pancakes.

As you hummed alongside to the song, you were running through the stuff you needed for the annual Singles Sleepover that night in your mind. The Singles Sleepover started as a joke between your best friends, Tom and Haz but ended up being a ritual every year.

Even though Tom was your best friend, there was no denying that you had feelings for him. When you told about your feelings towards Tom to Harrison, he has tried so many times to set the both of you up, but to no avail. You felt that Tom has always seen you as a best friend and those little gestures and kisses were nothing but a way of showing his platonic love towards you.

You heard the sound of footsteps approaching you and you turned around to see Tom. Handing him a mug, you stirred the batter for the pancakes.

“How are the pancakes going, love?” you felt him hug you from behind and you instantly relaxed in his arms.

“Better than you, I would say,” you smirk at him, as he lets out an exaggerated gasp.

After making the pancakes, you slid a plate towards Tom and he gives you a goofy grin. 

“You make the best pancakes, Y/N. I love you so much!”

“Thank you so much, but actually I love you more,”

“Nah, I love you more,”

“I would step on Lego for you,”

“Shit, you win this time,” Tom pouted as you gave him a cheeky grin.

“So, what are watching today for our sleepover huh?” you asked him.

“What about the new episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine? I know you wanted to watch it,”

“You know me too well, Holland. By the way, Haz isn’t joining us this time right?”

“Yeah, he wants to spend today with Mia doing gross coupley shit,” he said, doing a disgusted face.

Harrison met Mia during his semester break last summer and those two instantly hit it off. They were literally a match made in heaven and you could only imagine that you and Tom were like that.

Standing up, you brought your plates to the sink to wash it. Then, you remembered that you had to ask Tom about dinner. 

“Hey Tom, wha-” you turned around to see him standing close to you. You could smell the strong scent of mint and cinnamon and his deep brown eyes had a magnetic force that was strong enough to pull you in. He leaned towards you and you swore that your heart was gonna jump out of your chest.

Shit, is he gonna kiss me?

Oh god, is he?

You closed your eyes as you tried to calm down your nerves. Tom wasn’t stopping and the moment your noses nearly touched, a shrill tone rang through the house.

Startled, both of you pulled away from each other. Tom picked up his phone and noticed that Haz was calling him. Muttering a string of profanities, he answered the call reluctantly.

“Yeah, mate...Um, sure... yeah. I will see you there,” he ended the call and turned to you. You still haven’t recovered from his sudden move towards you and now you had no idea on how to react now.

“Um, love I’m sorry that I have to leave now. I promised Haz that I would help choose a gift for Mia. I promise that I will help you set up for the sleepover tonight, darling,” he said as he slipped on his jacket and sent a small wave your way before stepping out the door.

Plopping yourself on the couch, you touched your face that was getting super hot and let out a soft sigh. A heavy feeling settled in your chest as you only thought of one thing.

What the fuck just happened?

➳

“Really, love? You are going with that?”

“Yes, and this is my final decision,”

“Oh God, Y/N, pizza and wine do not go well together,” he shook his head, a smile etched on his perfect face.

“In the Tom way, it doesn’t but in my way, it definitely does,” you responded smugly. He let out a loud laugh, his eyes gleaming with adoration for you. He picked up his wine glass and held it up in the air to make a toast.

“To another year of being single and miserable!”

“Hey, so are you saying that being with me is miserable?” you prodded, a teasing tone to your voice.

“Oh, how can I be miserable when I’m with you, darling?”

➳

After three boxes of pizzas and one too many glasses of wine, both of you were splayed out on the couch binge-watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Game of Thrones. 

“Tom, don’t you think that Jake and Amy look so cute together?” your eyes fixed on the screen.

When your question didn’t elicit a response from him, you nudged him to get his attention. A frown was evident on his face and he seemed to be thinking very deeply.

“Hey, Tom, you okay?” you shook his shoulders a little and it made him snap out of his trance and focus on you.

“Mhm yeah?”

“What were you thinking about, huh?”

“Its nothin’, love”

“Come on, tell me please...,”

“Do you really want to know?” you eagerly nodded your head.

“Okay, here it goes. Y/N, I think, no I’m sure that I have been in love with you since the day I met you. You have never failed to amaze me and I’m so grateful to have you in my life. You helped me through so many, stayed with me through thick and thin and also successfully put up with me. I absolutely gone crazy for you and I really would love to be more than friends. So, will you be the Amy to my Jake?”

You felt as if time had stopped and it was just you and Tom in the whole universe. He was in love with me the whole time? How did I not know about about this?

You were way beyond shocked to formulate a proper response in your head so you just sat there gaping at him. This lead to Tom thinking that he botched this whole proposing thing and he ruined his friendship with you.

“Oh love...if you don’t like me it’s totally okay. Please don’t fre-”

You cut him off by pressing your lips against his and slid your hands around his neck. Tom was surprised at first but he deepened the kiss and placed his hands on your hips. 

Crawling onto his lap, you started grinding against him, just as you let out a moan. He broke your kiss as you both looked at each other, panting heavily.

“Love, that was...amazing. So, you like me too?”

“I have always liked you, dumbass,”

“Wanna go to your room and continue?” you asked him, lust evident in his eyes.

“Sure, baby.”

➳

[dalrynne]

gay ask for gays only: all of them

1. describe your idea of a perfect date

hmm maybe a fun day at an amusement park or movies, a nice dinner, then stargazing or something? idk tbh just something where we’d have fun together and do cute coupley stuff hehe (but not like too much pda bc thats annoying)

2. whats your “type”

i’m a real sucker for the “quiet artsy/mysterious” type LMAO. i like people who are creative, kinda quiet, thoughtful, romantic, spontaneous, and honest

3. do you want kids?

yeah, someday

4. if you do, will you adopt or use some other form of child birth?

sigh, probs childbirth but adopting doesn’t sound bad either?

5. describe the cutest date you’ve ever been on

well i haven’t been on many tbh... i think the cutest one was when we walked around the pier at night, holding hands bc it was cold. we also talked while sitting on the swings on a playground and he pushed me on the swing haha. then when we got too cold to stay outside, we went in somewhere for some hot cocoa~

6. describe your experience having sex for the first time (were you nervous? or was it easy peasy?)

i wouldn’t know LOL

7. are you a morning time gay or night time gay?

night time!! my brain (and heart) is like x10 more awake and active at night haha

8. opinion on nap dates?

incredibly adorable and honestly goals

9. opinion on brown eyes?

they’re so underrated! they have such a warmth and depth to them... they’re so alluring and sometimes i feel like i can drown in them. i love brown eyes

10. dog gay or cat gay?

both?? although in terms of personality, i suppose i’d be more of a cat :3c

11. would you ever date someone who owned rodents or reptiles?

mmm yeah sure, reptiles are cool tho and rodents can be cute! but i might not be 100% comfortable if their pets were like just loose around the house when i came over?

12. whats a turn off you look for before you start officially dating someone

poor communication/conversation skills... if they can’t hold and carry a good conversation, then whats the point? communication is one of the most important things in a relationship! 

13. what is a misconception you had about lgb people before you realized you were one?

oh god,,, i was actually homophobic before i realized that i was gay myself bc i was raised in a very conservative, homophobic, christian household. its highly unsettling to remember myself like that tbh... i had once thought that lgbtq+ people were ‘choosing’ to be gay smh

14. what is a piece of advice you would give to your younger self

pls don’t let other people’s perceptions of you deter you from enjoying and loving the things you do. also pls, for the love of god, get some new clothes... you need to really reevaluate your fashion choices

15. (if attracted to more than one gender) do you have different “types” for different genders?

yes!! i tend to like feminine boys and more androgynous girls? 

16. who is an ex you regret?

my “first boyfriend” LMAO he was such a shitbag... he didn’t treat me right and cheated on me. fuck him

17. night club gay or cafe gay?

cafeee! omg thats so wholesome and cute ajskdhaf/// night clubs are fun too but not my first choice... they’re just so crowded and loud and sweaty

18. who is one person you would “go straight” for

well uhh i’m pan so i do still like men LMAO so idk? a lot of them???

19. video game gay, book gay, or movie gay?

book! or maybe movie... but books are richer imo and leave room for you to imagine/create things yourself!

20. favourite gay ship (canon or not)

i think,,,, klance (from voltron)?

21. favourite gay youtuber

troye sivan (pls make more videos again ajskda i miss him;;;)

22. have you ever unknowingly asked out a straight person?

um i’ve never asked someone out so LOL

23. have you ever been in love?

tbh i don’t think so? if so, then only very very briefly.

24. have you ever been heartbroken?

uhhhh i don’t think so? since i don’t think i’ve ever truly loved anyone romantically so how can i get my heart broken LOL

25. how do you determine if you want to be them or be with someone

THIS IS THE HARDEST THING TO DISTINGUISH TBH to this day, i struggle and often i’m not able to tell the difference :’)

26. favourite lgb musician/band

again troye sivan!

27. what is a piece of advice you have for young / baby gays

the attraction and love you feel for people is not wrong or gross... its lovely and i hope you can continue to explore yourself to find happiness and love!!

28. are you out? if so how did you come out

if you exclude the interwebs (LMAO i talk about being gay all over the internet to my internet friends) uhh no haha only to a couple of close friends irl

29. what is the most uncomfortable / strange coming out experience you have

umm i don’t think i’ve ever had one?

30. what is a piece of advice for people who may not be in a safe place to express their sexuality

oh man, you must be feeling very frustrated and suffocated... but if you can, try to find a safe space where you can express yourself! whether it be with a close group of trusted friends, a club at school, internet friends, or even your own private journal or something! i’m sorry you have to go through this, but pls stay strong!!