#its so much more fun that botw makes it seem

[kansasjustgotgayer]

Today i learned that i am a naturally Pretty Good Climber

[waywardsalt]

mmmgh

[blueskittlesart]

pleeease give a review for infinity nikki ive been thinking about downloading it but i dont know if i have the space and if its worth it to clear some up for it !!!

as someone who spent HOURS on flash-based dollmakers as a kid, i absolutely love it. the gameplay hits somewhere between dressup game and open-world RPG, in that there's a large botw-like open map to explore, but the express purpose of exploring it is to unlock new clothes for your character. The exploration itself feels very calm and cozy most of the time, with the emphasis being on small collection tasks like fishing, bug-catching, and foraging. again, all of this is specifically to craft new outfits for nikki which you can both coordinate with no limitations to wear in the open world and use in scored styling contests with npcs, some of which reward you with game currency and some of which help you progress the story quests. the only place where i feel the gameplay truly suffers is in combat. you have one attack, and it's a ranged shooter, but there's no aim-assist whatsoever, and the mobile joystick isn't NEARLY sensitive enough to justify this. aiming in combat is one of the most difficult parts of the game, and nikki can only take 5 hits before she dies and has to respawn, making combat decently frustrating. However, there are very few places where combat is strictly necessary in-game, and both of the boss battles i've done so far had hitboxes large enough that it wasn't an issue; it's really in the open world against hordes of smaller enemies that the lack of targeting becomes really frustrating. other than that, though, the controls are fairly well-designed and intuitive, especially if you've played similar games before.

The clothes themselves are the star of the show, of course. I've yet to see a single clothing item in the game that I don't want. there's a good mix of fancy intricate outfit pieces and basics to obtain early-on, and without even touching the gacha you can coordinate some really cute outfits via in-universe boutiques and quests that reward you with clothes. Even the very obviously themed ability outfit sets that you craft early on almost always have a few pieces that are easy to mix and match with, so there's a TON of styling potential even for free players! As for the gacha, it's actually one of the more generous games i've played in terms of rewards and pity systems. My one complaint so far is that the 5-star gacha outfits especially seem to be very accessory-heavy, meaning it's possible to pull shoes, multiple necklaces, gloves, socks, and hairpieces before ever pulling the dress they're very obviously designed around. there is a pity mechanic to prevent this, but it requires you to pull a few too many times before your guarantee imo.

The story is ridiculous in a good way. It kind of reads like a 2000s-era barbie movie to me right now, in the best way possible. there's an amazingly predictable sexy villain, cute little flying creatures that follow you around, and every conflict is, of course, solved via clothes in one way or another. My absolute favorite thing about the writing, though, is how blatantly earnest it all is. at no point does the game poke fun at its own wacky concept or even attempt to make some self-aware joke about it to the player--it plays everything completely straight, and in this aspect it almost feels MORE self-aware. it knows that the kind of person who wants to play a dressup rpg is also the kind of person who does not, under any circumstances whatsoever, want to be questioned or made fun of for their love of fashion or their engagement with that game. It very much feels like the devs know that they're working with primarily girls and young women and a subject matter that those girls and young women are often looked down upon or made fun of for seriously engaging with, and so it promises to engage EXTRA-seriously to make up for that. (side note: there's one point in a story quest where, when asked to make a wish, nikki wishes that all girls never get cramps again. that was when i knew this was a game that knew its audience.) If I wanted to nitpick, i might say that every quest so far has sort of felt like an increasingly ridiculous trading sequence--you learn what you need to do very early on, but you'll always spend several hours of gameplay encountering obstacles and doing other smaller tasks to circumvent those obstacles so you can reach your original goal. this might annoy me more if the game was trying to market itself as a serious RPG, but it seems very self-aware to me, and despite how i'm describing it none of the quests ive played have actually FELT tedious. I think the fact that it's such a wild concept to begin with gives the writers a bit of leeway in how they handle the story quests, and because I as the player am aware i'm playing a dressup game I don't really expect quests to immediately get to the point and let me fight something. I will say that there are certain things that aren't super intuitive especially if you aren't a seasoned gacha rpg player, particularly the features relating to advancing your skills and the styling points of your clothing. though the game does technically explain what you need to do, it doesn't explain the RELEVANCE of the feature, just that it exists, so I had to lose multiple styling contests before I realized i could upgrade my clothing to get higher scores.

The final thing I'll talk about is performance. I'm playing the game on my iphone 13, and the performance is.... not great, i'm ngl. Off the bat, if you play the game on a mobile device, you're going to be getting a HEAVILY scaled-down version of the terrain graphics. all of those screenshots you see online of beautiful terrain full of flowers and particle effects are from ps5s or custom pcs. truthfully, the mobile app looks like a game from 2012 and it will still turn your phone into an incinerator. I've also encountered multiple graphics bugs, some during pivotal scenes, and I get consistent lags when playing for longer than a few hours, likely due to the strain on my phone's hardware. it's also an INSANE battery drain, so i only play when my phone is plugged in. All that being said, the game has been out for less than a week, so visual bugs are inevitable, and the developers have stated that mobile optimization is a priority, so hopefully we'll at the very least no longer have to overheat our devices to play it soon. Also worth noting, from what I've seen the rendering of the CLOTHING doesn't suffer AT ALL on mobile devices. presumably they sacrificed terrain rendering to allow for such beautiful texturing on the clothing itself, which, given that the clothing is the main focus of the game, I can't fault them for. Basically, if you're going to try to run an unreal engine game on your iphone, be aware that it will run like an unreal engine game on an iphone. and prepare yourself to have to let your device cool down every few hours.

tldr: i love the game so far. i'm really excited to keep playing and see where the story goes, and I think they should make more games for girls <3

[ganondoodle]

so guess what they released more interviews and i think given what a writing shitshow totk was and what they have been saying in all these interviews is actually painting a really bad picture; i dont have the time, nor the energy to go over every detail

but they were commenting on people wanting the more linear format back and aonuma himself basically said that he thinks people who feel like that do so only bc of nostalgia and "Why do you want to go back to a type of game where you're more limited or more restricted in the types of things or ways you can play?"

what .. the fuck, more freedom DOESNT automatically mean better??? like ... restriction can be a GOOD thing just as tooo much freedom can be BAD?? like in totk??? are you fukcing shitting me- what the hell are games even for then, has he had an awakening to the fact that he actually just loves sandbox games without realizing it???? im not playing fucking zelda for a sandbox, especially not when its advertised as a somethign else

its pretty clear that they want to keep this format going with everything they say there, ... maybe it really is over huh

also i hate how they kept talking around answering anything about story/lore; they go asked how ganondorf even connects to ganon since theres nothign about it in game, and all they got out was welllll we dont wanna say anything bc its up to the player; about every question you got the answer of "make somethign up yourself" which is just ... its really clear they dont actually care but dont want to say everything is meaningless actually, so they try to be vague about it and with doing that really just confirm they didnt think about it and they dont care- so no lore actually matters, nothing thats been said or established has any meaning bc they will get rid of it the second it crosses paths with their new -more freedom equals better- philosophy, they say its bc they want you to be "free" to think up anything but apparently dont realize that when there are no rules, no consistent lore or anything that it ROBS it, it stops having meaning, its fun to connect dots only when there are rules you need to work with and dots to connect in the first place, when you have an established world with its restrictions it drives you to think more creatively about things- but when there are no rules?? its fucking boring!! thats what it is!!

when you discard all rules i wont care to get invested into anything bc i know it will not be considered again, be done away with without any reason and wont have influence on coming or previous games ... bc there are no rules, anything is possible and everything can be changed any second, so nothing matters

(they also talked about the many viral videos of those very few dedicated people that make godzilla mechs in totk and how happy they are about that- i get that to some extent, but the way they kept talkign about it really just felt like it confirmed my suspicion that that whole mechanic was mainly implemented to let people do that since that gets shared around en masse making it seem like that is why people enjoy it while neither the game nor the narrative are build around it in any way ..)

it just makes all the time i spend thinking, feeling and theorizing about zelda like a true waste of time, bc nothing matters and there are no rules-

i am someone who greatly enjoys working with and around established lore/rules, its fun to me to recontextulize things by being smart or creative with it all without breaking anything or as little as possible of the established things!

if i wanted to do just do anything i want I COULD HAVE ALREADY DONE THAT bc theres nothing actually stopping anyone to just make up what they want! i DONT need canon to lose all rules for that??!!

maybe ill have to make myself believe the franchise ended with botw on a good note ... ono

[mlmvoreconfessionals]

Prompts for BOTW Preds (ideally Sidon, Link, and Kass, but any of them work!) eating people and then the weight all going to their ass/thighs, and getting stares/teased because of their new thiccness?

I can work with this, those three are always fun. I kinda got mixed up with that last part so they're the ones doing the teasing instead. Whoops.

S.idon lets out a harsh belch, followed by a sigh as he feels the heavy weight settle in his stomach. Dealing with L.ynel can be such an issue, especially when more than one comes around. His guts are stretched tight now, churning and groaning hard as it tries to process three of them. Even one is a heavy meal for the prince, but this is a lot. It’s left his gut sitting on the ground, stretched tightly around the forms of the three beasts. He can already feel his gut working hard to try and process it all.

Of course, he didn’t do this alone. His greatest friend L.ink had helped him! He always knows that L.ink can be relied on to help him with these sorts of things and handle the problem. Of course...S.idon isn’t so often this gluttonous around the H.ylian. But they haven’t had to face three L.ynels at once before, either.

Another wet belch roars out of S.idon, making him flush slightly. His guts are boiling hard, already beginning to break down some of that L.ynel meat. At the same time, though, S.idon notices that L.ink is staring at him. It flusters the prince a bit and he worries that L.ink might be unnerved by the process. But...instead, it seems like his friend is staring with rapt attention. That’s somehow even more flustering.

Still, if L.ink is taking an interest, he wouldn’t want to shy away from that. So S.idon happily invites L.ink to come closer and even feel for himself. And L.ink’s hands...well, they may be small, but S.idon finds that they feel wonderful rubbing over his engorged stomach. L.ink isn’t afraid to get rough with it, pushing in as hard as he can. It gets some wet belches out of S.idon...and maybe a slight moan or two. Which he’d deny out of embarrassment.

S.idon’s gut steadily recedes as time goes on. The L.ynel’s squirming and roaring grow less pronounced, overpowered by the wet churning and gurgling of the Z.ora’s stomach. L.ink’s hands sink in deeper with every push on the softening forms of the beasts, earning him wet squelches and other noises in return. And much more shameless moans out of S.idon as the process only becomes more enjoyable with time.

But all that meat has to go somewhere. And as the L.ynels are broken down and the thick, meaty slurry is pumped through S.idon’s digestive tract, his body shows its effects. His ass and hips especially take on a lot of that weight, growing thicker and rounder with each meaty pump of his intestines. His gut stops shrinking long before it finishes its job, L.ink finding it growing flabbier under his hands as he helps to rub.

In the end, the three L.ynels are left as nothing more than some extra heft on S.idon’s form. The prince tries not to let it bother him at all when he feels the wobble of his cheeks on their trek back to the kingdom. He just knows he’ll be getting comments about his weight. It’s not exactly the form Z.ora royalty are meant to take as they get bigger...

But he also notices L.ink’s eyes trained on his backside as they walk. He can practically feel his friend burning a hole into him with how hard he’s staring. S.idon finds himself smiling a bit at the idea. And he makes sure there’s a bit of extra sway to his step as they walk back just for L.ink.

---

“Wait, I almost got it!” the R.ito cries out. “Let me try again! I swear I--” A gulp silences the bird, his pleas turned into a muffled cry as his head sinks down L.ink’s gullet. The H.ylian lets out a sigh once he's down, followed by a belch that lets some feathers fly out.His guts boil and churn loudly, already getting to work on yet another R.ito warrior.

R.evali puts a wing to his face, trying to hide the fact that he’s blushing and the fact that he’s staring. As usual, R.evali got a little...too cocky when dealing with L.ink. Going on about the superiority of R.itos and how any of their warriors could best the H.ylian in archery. Of course, he ended up having to put his money where his mouth is, and...well...

Another series of gulps and slurps ring out and R.evali peeks out from behind his wing. Yet another archer is going down the hatch, his legs kicking and flailing wildly as L.ink casually devours him. And still, the H.ylian’s gut is bubbling heavily, processing the last couple of failures down into more fat.

Yes, more fat, R.evali notes. L.ink has gained...excessive amounts of weight like this. His stomach hangs out of his shirt, exposed freely as it works hard. It won’t be fitting well under that shirt for a while, either. Even when it’s done processing all that R.ito meat. It bulges further as another dives in with a thick splash, left to kick around in a panic before being overwhelmed by the ruthless digestive process.

Of course, that’s not the only part of L.ink that’s expanded. He’s grown rather...bottom heavy since this started. His pants are hanging on by a threat, ripping apart around his thicker thighs and ass. Sudden movements only exasperated the problem, and R.evali almost wonders if they’ll hold on to the end or not.

Wait, no, he isn’t wondering that! Not at all! R.evali quickly adverts his gaze again, ignoring the whimpering pleas of another R.ito for the champion to stop L.ink from devouring him. Pleas that are paired with wet gulps and slurps of said R.ito rapidly being dragged into that bubbling pit. R.evali is certain L.ink is doing this all on purpose, trying to...get into his head or something.

Another wet belch rumbles out of L.ink. Then R.evali hears wet sloshing sounds and the creaking of wood. He hesitates before looking past his wing again. L.ink is approaching him, looking so...casually smug over what he’s done. R.evali can’t stand that awful look on his face. Or the way his guts slosh with every step, stirring up the meaty slurry that some of their finest R.ito warriors had been reduced to. Or...how his hips seem to sway a bit with every step.

R.evali huffs and lowers his wing completely, trying to stand up straight and remain focused and powerful. He will not let L.ink win this. “Fine, you may have outperformed all of them. But we both know you’ll never reach my heights, L.ink.” As R.evali says that, he nocks an arrow and prepares to show off. L.ink belches again, right in R.evali’s ear, and his fingers slip as he lets the arrow fly.

...L.ink walks away from the R.ito training course about half an hour later. His pants are gone, but he barely notices the chill in the air. One hand rubs lazily over his gut as it burbles and churns wetly. The other picks at his teeth with the end of a dark blue feather. A few more escape his mouth as a bubbling belch comes up. Someone will probably clean all those up.

---

“It’s quite impressive, isn’t it, T.eba?” K.ass asks with a soft smile in that usual sweet voice of his. He looks back, but he’s not able to see the other R.ito from under his mass ass. It’s grown quite a lot since he’d left home, and now that he’s finally back, he hardly looks like the bird he was before!

Of course, when he did come home, nearly every R.ito stared at him. K.ass was plenty used to the attention so it barely phased him. T.eba was the first to actually come up and ask about it, and well, K.ass was more than happy to show off for the newest leader of their tribe. And T.eba does feel quite nice smooshed under his ass like a cushion.

K.ass can feel the muffled voice of the R.ito against him, the actual words lost to his ass fat. The way T.eba moves around tickles him just a bit, keeping the bard jovial. “I picked this up from some techniques described in some ancient songs,” K.ass goes on, despite not really knowing what T.eba was saying. “I’d have tested it out on some of those awful monsters roaming around but I’ve never been the best fighter. Thankfully, I met a few H.ylians not long after I figured out the songs’ meaning!”

Oh yes, those H.ylians had been very helpful. More than happy to give K.ass a hand with things. Sure, they might not have been anticipating being suddenly scooped up into the R.ito’s beak and ruthlessly guzzled down like a few snacks. But that wasn’t really important, was it? They melted down just fine and really helped in adding to K.ass’s...mass~ He wiggles his ass back and forth slightly, getting some more muffled noises out of T.eba.

“I had a few more of those during my travels,” K.ass goes on. “I even got a bit...greedy, lets say, and picked off an entire stable during a night of rest! I even decided to snack on the leftover horses and my did they really add on some heft.” K.ass’s stomach just gurgles at the thought and he smiles, giving it a slight rub.

“Well, after that, I realized bigger meals were better. Traveling groups or...larger meals.” He chuckles slightly into his wing. “Did you know L.ynel tastes quite similar to horse? They’re rather hard to catch, but the one bothering those Z.ora was manageable while it was distracted with them.” K.ass slurps over his beak just thinking of the meal. “Speaking of Z.ora...they also taste like fish! I only had a few...and that delectable prince of theirs...”

S.idon had been just as filling as the L.ynel, really. And just as wiggly. No one really noticed the difference when the ‘L.ynel eating R.ito’ waddled out of their village with something else large stretching out his gut. Another low grumble echoes up from K.ass’s stomach, making him perk up and smile. He looks over his shoulder again.

“Or, that’s right, I meant to ask. Do you know if our old leader is still around, T.eba?” K.ass can feel the R.ito try to speak again. Still can’t hear him. “Well, I suppose I’ll find out for myself. I’m sure R.ito tastes a lot like other bird and he’s quite the meal himself...” K.ass is already drooling over the thought, grinding his ass back further against T.eba. “Oh, and don’t worry! I’ll let you feel my ass once he’s added to it, too! You can let me know if it feels any different.” K.ass smiles as he finally feels T.eba go slack with a whimpering groan. It’s good to be home.

[adrift-in-thyme]

Five times a fairy ran from wild (and the one time it stayed)?? 👀

One of my many in progress fairy Time fics 😅

I love Time and Wild’s dynamic and am always looking for opportunities to write them. And as I was trying (unsuccessfully) to catch fairies in botw the other day I started thinking about how interesting it would be for Wild to meet a fairy who doesn’t run…at least not at first. So this wip was born

Here’s a snippet!

Wild kneels, wincing at the ache in his knees and the way they crack and pop at the movement.

“Sorry,” he says, sheepishly when the fairy pauses. He hopes he hasn’t scared the little guy away. “My body’s noisier than I’d like it to be. Cost of being a hero, I guess.” He thinks for a moment. “You’d think the shrine would’ve taken care of that but…”

The fairy watches him. It doesn’t seem frightened, however. If anything, it seems much more comfortable than Wild would expect. Much more, given that now that he looks a bit closer, Wild swears the tiny creature is laughing at him.

The way its light dims and expands in small waves of color, the jingling sound that emanates from it, like minuscule bells — if that isn’t laughter, the champion doesn’t know what is.

“Oh, okay.” He can’t stop from chuckling. Its teasing humor is infectious. “So, that’s how you’re gonna be. Is that why you didn’t run? Cause you wanted to make fun of my suffering?” He lifts an eyebrow, doing his best to look annoyed. “I’ll have you know I’m doing great for my age. Not every one-hundred-and-twenty year old can move this smoothly.”

The fairy’s light goes bright again and Wild laughs along with it.

[smash-64]

2024 Game of the Year Countdown Honorable Mention: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom Nintendo Switch, 2023

I feel like I’ve played this game before…oh, right! I did! It was 2018 and the game was called The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. 

Now that at least one person is furious with me, I have to say that I did not hate my time with Tears of the Kingdom. I just don’t think it lived up to the immeasurable hype that I heard from critics, websites, YouTube, and friends. I don’t think I heard a single person say a single negative thing about this game for two months after it came out. I even heard people singing its praises multiple times on NPR, one of the last platforms where I’d expect to hear video game reviews. 

So, let’s start out with the things I liked after the cut, because this is going to be a super long review, for those interested.

I adored exploring the Gerudo Desert, as I did in Breath of the Wild. The Gerudo are a really fun and interesting group, and I spent significantly more time here than anywhere else. It was nice to see Link welcomed into town as the one male with a hall pass, since that meant I didn’t need to make sure to always don the disguise outfit. (Although it’s silly to put on the full Yiga Clan garb and get tossed into jail!) The addition of a subterranean area in Gerudo Town was also cool and helped add to the lore of the Gerudo having a long history. The bright colors and designs of the town, clothing, and the equipment were also still present and welcome. And seeing Riju grow into her role as leader was both cool, as she packs a wallop with her thunder attack, and reassuring as she was fairly self-conscious and unsure of herself in Breath of the Wild. 

The Yiga Clan are also still around, and I found them more interesting than in BotW. I wish we had a little more from them, but they’re supposed to be in disarray after we crushed them in BotW, so it wouldn’t make a ton of sense from a narrative standpoint.

Music was generally pretty good, especially in the more plot-centric sequences. The classic Zelda swells and melodies bring emotion to the forefront, most notably nostalgia. The credits music ties the whole experience together. Can’t really go wrong with a Zelda soundtrack, although it was a touch less subtle than Breath of the Wild.

Tulin was a really refreshing character that somehow struck a balance between over-eager young bird with skills, and annoying kid. In fact, he’s one of the only kid characters I genuinely enjoyed from start to finish in any game. He’s determined to help his village, prove himself, work as a team with Link, and follow through with his new role once you complete the Wind Temple. 

Finally, the characters themselves all seem to have had a bit of a glow-up, design-wise. Everyone looks great. There’s also a focus on making characters stand out more, with more unique designs and more plot relevance. Some have more of a part to play than others, but there were seemingly fewer one-off interactions in TotK. Many sidequests have multiple parts to them that occur across the map, so expect to see characters popping up more than once.

Something that has undoubtedly stood out thus far in my review is how often I have referenced Breath of the Wild. It is fully unavoidable to review Tears of the Kingdom on its own. It looks, sounds, feels, and plays like Breath of the Wild. I have heard criticisms of Majora’s Mask from some people who claim they couldn’t enjoy it as much as Ocarina of Time due to the reuse of assets, claiming it was too similar, or even lazy (which just proves they don’t know the actual history of Majora’s Mask, but I digress). But even those critics have to recognize that Majora’s Mask shares little beyond the reuse of assets as the game is fundamentally different on so many levels. 

Tears of the Kingdom is so similar to Breath of the Wild, I find it hard to not look at the whole game as anything other than a massive DLC. We’re on the same map. We’ve got towers and shrines all over, and while they’re not in exactly the same spots…they’re not that different and serve the same purpose. Zelda needs rescuing. Ganon(dorf) is the bad guy. Enemies are the same. Controls are the same. It felt like I was playing the same game, maybe just a different post-game story. 

The addition of the sky islands and the ill-lit underworld were so underwhelming to me that I never felt compelled to explore beyond a few minutes, aside from when I was forced to do so. I just didn’t find anything interesting about them at all. It was difficult to even get to the sky islands in the early game, and once I finally made my way there, I was expecting unique weapons and enemies, or powerful ingredients for cooking. I got neither, so I don’t really see the point. Perhaps I missed some massive highlight, but I have yet to hear about anything that would make me seek out some special, far-flung sky island for amazing content. 

The same goes for the dark abyss area, which I heard was this hugely fun land to explore. When I got there, it was just…dark. I couldn’t even see anything off in the distance to entice me into exploring, and the light seeds you get don’t travel very far, nor do they light very much of the area around you, so you’re still stumbling around and hoping to just chance upon something. As a result, I didn’t do much of anything down there at all. 

The Zonai tech was a huge letdown, too. I didn’t exactly adore the magnetism, bombs, stasis, etc. from BotW, but it was serviceable. This new stuff in TotK was downright not fun. When I see people building these huge, elaborate devices with fans and batteries and whatnot, I honestly cannot fathom the enjoyment they’re getting out of it. It got to the point where I just never did any shrines ever again. I’d find one and activate it as a warp point, and never go inside because they were annoying chores. 

The new tech felt gimmicky at the best of times, too, and I was disappointed that the developers clearly focused so much time and effort on it instead of…anything else. Being able to throw random objects onto a sword isn’t as interesting as discovering well-crafted weapons that have a bit of lore or culture behind them. Instead, we just get a couple of very basic weapons and are expected to combine them with random monster parts to make stronger ones, but they always end up looking held together with paper clips and bubble gum.

Perhaps my time playing games from Falcom’s Trails series has bled over and corrupted my ability to fairly assess the storytelling and writing in other games and series; and while there was definitely a bigger focus on story in TotK than BotW, I still found the story to be lacking. Maybe it was just my disinterest, but it came off as very underwhelming to me. I liked individual moments, like Riju standing on her own or Zelda actually playing a part in the plot, but the overall story just didn’t click with me. It all felt like something I’d already done before.

I found the difficulty in this game to be a bit of a mixed bag. I welcomed some of the more difficult enemies and the increase in the number of boss fights, in general, but the final gauntlet was such an enormous leap in difficulty that it was ultimately the thing that made me put the game back on the shelf for about five months. I was getting bored with the game, skipped both the Goron and Zora areas, and was forced to fight their bosses at the end of the game as a result. This was definitely a difficult surprise since I had no tips from the respective champions, and while I did manage to scrape through, I never felt a sense of accomplishment, only frustration and annoyance. I appreciated the option to skip Divine Beasts in BotW, but this felt like a harsher punishment in the endgame.

Even in BotW, I was never one for “proper” Zelda combat, with parries and such, not to mention being moderately underpowered. So brute forcing it was kind of my MO, and TotK very clearly doesn’t want you to do that. As I’ve gotten older, I enjoy Hardcore Gamer Moments™ less and less and I think my favorite thing to happen to video games is the difficulty slider that allows me to choose the type of experience I have. Work and life is stressful and I don’t generally want my games to be the same. Or, at the very least, I’d like the option to choose.

Now, I must admit that when I got frustrated and put the game back on the shelf, I wasn’t really intending to ever return to it because I wasn’t having fun. However, after five months, something changed and I was open to making another attempt. The water and fire temples were extremely unenjoyable experiences, with the very long, drawn-out quests for the Spirit Sage and Master Sword being only slightly less chore-like, and this has essentially always been the case with Zelda dungeons for me. I almost never enjoy them, which explains why the list of Zelda games I like is shockingly short. I actually gave up on the Master Sword quest because it involved expanding my stamina gauge, which meant completing shrines and I hated shrines in this game, so I said screw it.

However, I did beat the game. I sought out the temples I originally skipped, finished them, and headed back to Ganondorf for a second attempt. It was definitely easier, but still a jump in difficulty compared to the rest of the game. I didn’t feel satisfied with the fights, only annoyed that I had to be troubled to finish them at all. 

My last real gripe is just how this game is essentially one massive roadblock. Every single thing you want to do will be locked behind having to complete some OTHER quest first, which is supremely annoying and a complete break from what Breath of the Wild was. I found myself just wishing I was playing Breath of the Wild instead, which cannot be a glowing endorsement for Tears of the Kingdom.

I can’t say I regret playing TotK and I didn’t hate every minute I spent with the game, despite some of my grumblings. It didn’t reach the heights of BotW, but I did spend over a month playing it, when it’s all said and done. I still like the open world Zelda aspect and the art direction is still top notch. Nintendo always puts their A Team on Zelda projects, so it’s never a franchise you can ignore, even if individual games don’t do it for you.

[slade-neko]

Something fun I did during my time away was... I finally played The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild!

Before I had only ever watched my brother play the game when it originally launched in 2017, but never had much of an interest to play it myself. After all the hype of Tears of the Kingdom upon its release back in May of 2023, I finally decided to give BotW a shot and I am so glad I did.

It definitely plays a lot different from classic 3D Zelda games, but it's a lot of fun. Main story felt weak having everything merely be flashbacks, but getting lost in the immersion while exploring the world was the highlight for me.

Cemu Emulator + Mods!

I played the Wii U version on PC via the Cemu emulator and installed a couple of mods throughout my playthrough. Mainly the Linkle mod and tried a few different music overhauls. Man, I wish Nintendo would just release PC ports. Modding games is so much fun haha. Makes the whole experience customizable and enjoyable.

Big fan of the Linkle mod. I know she's not an official Zelda character, more of a Koei Tecmo OC, but the mod is very cute. I appreciate how it affects NPCs and has them react to you being a girl, even goes as far as making her Link's sister for the story.

Co-op Mod

This game would've been an 11/10 if Nintendo officially made it 2-player co-op, so I could've played it with my brother with him as Link and me as Linkle. But it seems fan's have already got the co-op aspect down already haha. Very buggy, but playing with my bro as two Links was a blast!

Tears of the Kingdom

I did try Tears of the Kingdom too, but didn't get very far myself. I did see the entire game through my brother's playthrough and played his save a couple of times. Wasn't terribly impressed from my time with the game. Had some cool elements, but I think I prefer BotW more over TotK. Will have to give it another try sometime... maybe once the Linkle mod is out hahaha.

[embyrinitalics]

Don't get me wrong. Tears of the Kingdom is a fantastic game. I'm still having so much fun with it. It delivered on so many fronts. It has my favorite final boss in the series. And the new mechanics really do make BotW feel like a tech demo.

But.

My Big Complaint is: TotK should not have been a sequel to BotW.

(spoilers below the cut!)

I understand why they did it, and think it was inevitable. Getting to reuse the assets and maps saved so much time. And BotW was such a huge success that they couldn't not give it a sequel.

But seriously, what the heck?

TotK's storytelling basically ignored or erased everything that happened in BotW. What happened to the Sheikah tech that was literally everywhere? The Divine Beasts that had been plaguing the four regions for a century? Zelda's incorporeal battle with evil incarnate for 100 years and the inevitable trauma she and Link must have after everything that's happened to them? Nah we don't talk about that. Half the NPCs don't even know who Link is despite having plenty of canonical interactions.

And I'm like, ok, I get it, sure. We are so 100% into this new plot we don't have time to explain away the old stuff and I'll just have to deal with it. All right, sure! BotW had very cool and well crafted lore, I'm sure TotK will too! I can't wait for this airtight new story!

Except 🤨

Who are the Zonai actually? Why did they come to Hyrule and from where? Why do we only meet two of them? If Rauru and Sonia are the first of the Royal Family, is she part of the goddess' bloodline (a direct descendant of SS Zelda)? Did she die childless? If they had a child, was it distinctly half Zonai? SO MANY GANONDORF QUESTIONS I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START??!?! What's the deal with the secret stones anyway? Who made them? Why do they cause draconification? Is that what happened to Dinraal, Farosh, and Naydra? The Sheikah Shrines were trials left behind by devoted monks who underwent self mummification to train the Hero, but what's the deal with the Zonai ones again? And if they're supposed to be for Link too, when did Rauru have time to build them? And like the Depths?! Make zero sense??!

I could go on and on. As much fun as this game is and as cinematic as a lot of it was, the whole thing is riddled with holes and would've been SO MUCH BETTER if they just made it its own pocket universe like they did with Termina. Trying to have it make sense in the world BotW already established is impossible, and honestly just sort of like. Disrespectfully shoves BotW's dead body off a cliff and hopes no one finds the remains.

So, yeah! Great game! Beefy cutscenes! Fantastic ending! Awesome mechanics! But really really disappointing BotW erasure.

(I also feel like it suffered from trying to follow the same open world formula? Lots of people found the Tears in the wrong order and felt like they spoiled the story for themselves. And the way you were going around doing "search for Zelda" sidequests when you knew where she was but couldn't tell anyone seemed like an oversight. And I wouldn't have minded some more traditional dungeons, like what the Fire and Lightning temples had going on, but just, like. More.)

[darfeld]

Ok so, I want to talk about Star Wars Outlaws, even so it's a Ubisoft game and Ubisoft sucks in general. Now that this is established, let's go. I think there is a very good blend of genre in this game. The fact the protagonist is a thief leads to a kriffing lot of game tropes to make sens in univers. Like...

Stealling everything that is not glue to the decor for one thing. But also...

Recruiting your crew. This is a major trope of heist stories. This is the perfect pretext to go visit several planets.

The faction system works really well to make me forget I'm doing essentially grind missions. I'm just taking care of my rep, ok ? (Also the fact that you don't get those missions if you don't go find them is good.)

The fighting isn't the best in this game, but this is generally the game punishing you for getting caught so it my sens they didn't put to much effort into it. Although... they do force you to fight your way out several times... I get things have to get ugly in this genre, but maybe don't make me kill dozens of people on my way out. (I don't mind killing imps, but it's just weird to kill so much of them while I'm just a law life thief.)

Nix is a great companion, and sharing a meal with him is delightful.

Sabacc is good. I know it's this game own kind but it works for me. I would gladly play it with real cards.

The planets look good and are fun to explore. It's sometime obscure that you can't yet complet some objectives though which have been annoying once or twice. But I love going from point A to point B and I rather not use fast travel most of the time. ( it does help when you need to make to much come and go... )

I like Kay Vess... This one is obviously subjective but I get her. I like ND-5 too. I have yet finished Tatooine so there are a bunch of character I don't know yet. I like their version of Qi'ra and Lando. ( This reminds me, I need to reup my rep with Crimson Daw... You see what I wrote above? This doesn't fill like grind. )

And maybe I'm also happy with it because I didn't play every open-world out there. I played both Zelda botw and totk, Elden Ring, Horizon Zero:Dawn and Watchdogs Legion. Never finished any of them but I don't mind. What I get to is I played a bunch but maybe I don't feel the same fatigue with the genre that other player can experience, and I didn't play to the most recent Ubisoft blend to compare Outlaws too. Also it's Star Wars. Call me biased. But I do think this one works on a fondamental level. The theme and gameplay works well together and it's just great to have an open world game in the Star Wars univers. ( I mean, I guess Lego Star Wars : The Skywalker Saga qualify too, but that just not the same )

There are a couple of the I don't particularly care for, if I'm being honest. There are still a lot a of stuff that seems there only to mak the game longer. Sometimes you will see question mark on your compass that are mostly parcours bait with loot at the end. Fun on occasion but distracting. There are some event poping up when you travel the map like imps attacking pirates where you can go and steal from imps... Frankly I could do without those. And when I need a blaster upgrade to complete a treasure hunt I would like to know. The journal could be more clear about some stuffs. And I already told what I though of scripted fights, in a game where those are mostly a punishment for failing to sneak pass guards. ( I do like that you can die rather quickly in those fight tough... The punishment for dying isn't usually too painful, and it means you can quickly reset your infiltration attempt. ) Anyway, so far this game has failed to bore me out yet. I just wish I got more time to play it. ( But also it's a ubisoft game, which is its most fatal flaw... )

[blortch]

UGH! Once again, Mike "Both sides" Stoklasa not recognizing that there isn't an equivalency to right-wing conservatives who do not want representation, and progressives who do. He is either a secret conservative who doesn't want to piss off progressives, or really that stupid that he really thinks there is a equivalent both sides argument. The internet right wing conservative trolls far out weigh any troll like behavior on the left. The left mainly just say they want more diversity, and the right does not want that. There is no middle ground in discrimination. I applaud Rich for mainly keeping out of it, and/or leaning more to the left on the issue.

When I first was watching the video, I thought Mike's stance would be what he said in a previous star wars video about andor, where he listed off the different star wars shows on disney+, and he basically said there is so much star wars out there now, that each show has its own audience. His example was that there is a star wars show for babies, another for adults, like 'Andor'. I really thought he'd say something like "this show 'the acolyte' is a show for the left... who cares about the internet outrage... [and that the people complaining about diversity on the show should] just get over it and watch one of the other million star wars shows." Not give this mealy mouthed, both sidesism bullshit where by not denouncing it you're giving it oxygen.

More and more Mike shows his true colors. Like how he kept editing Rich. He literally cut off Rich's very valid, very coherent point about Ghostbusters and Robocop, I surmise because he did not want Rich to seem smarter. And idk, just the way he kept editing Rich seemed more vindictive than normal. Like yes he's done that alot, but Idk, it felt way more personal, maybe because Rich was not completely backing his both sidesism crap.

Sorry. Rant over. I had to complain to someone. Would love your always reasoned take on it.

I apologize for at first thinking this was a copypasta jaksjdfkj I haven't gotten a long ask in a good while. anyway. I feel like I Have to watch the video now even tho I wasn't intending to do so. We shall see. So for now bear in mind that I'm going off of your ask alone for my reply.

I think your assumption in how they would handle the Acolyte was a completely fair assumption to make so I'm surprised as you are from hearing Mike handle it differently this time.

You've touched upon something pretty interesting which is the editing perspective of them and I personally haven't noticed much of a discernible pattern in editing except for the occasional mike-making-fun-of-jay-in-editing or making fun of himself, so what you say of Mike editing anyone but himself kinda poorly is something I've heard claimed before that he does to Jay too. If this is true the fact that we, from our perspective, very rarely see Jay disagree as well as for Rich kinda takes an interesting turn doesn't it ? My point has often been, "well they work alongside him for a reason, they must agree with Mike on quite a lot" but this hints towards that maybe they aren't quite as uniform in perspective as one might assume from what we've seen and that it's a manufactured truth that we've been shown - but this is safe to assume either way by the sheer fact that the video has been edited and Jay and Mike themselves have said numerous times about how powerful editing is in terms of making things go numerous ways.

Pattern-wise in editing, in the past few years Jay has long been in charge of editing HITB and the Re:Views that have him in it + somebody that isn't Mike. Mike takes over "special episodes", to bring a recent example: the Death of Movie theaters video, or movies he deems important/decisive for their channel and analogous to Jay, his "own" Re:Views, while they alternate with editing BOTW more or less (cough whenever a BOTW is said to come out soon and Mike's editing cough you can count on it taking longer cough). Though as I've mentioned before, they supposedly check the other's edit before letting it air, I imagine this in videos where they both appear.

Now. This doesn't quite support the theory that Mike's this over-controlling maniac that pushes his own agenda more than Jay's or Rich's views through videos, though to perceive such a sentiment whenever he takes charge of editing could possibly imply that he, in other ways, does not allow opposing views from them. Admittedly, I can't quite paint this sinisterly because he Will take charge as the sole owner of the company (somehow for years I used to believe Jay co-owns RLM but wherever you look, Mike is listed as the ONLY owner) and of course he'd want his videos to reflect what he thinks and I mean, I can't think of many people off the top of my head that would cede on their views on important matters or would allow opposition without rebuttal, so to expect this from Mike wouldn't be fair. Though to us, who don't share his views and the topic of the Acolyte seems quite trivial compared to other matters, it seems like an overbearing, uninformed asshole move haha. I imagine in his eyes he justifies it as him being the director and him enforcing his vision.

As for the Acolyte to call it leftist media is hmmmm it feels a bit dirty and slimy to say that about a Disney product lols. I heard Andor brought up some super interesting points to analyze from that lens, which I find super baffling, that "pandering to the leftists" has become a Thing at all. When I read that the controversy was from casting Abigail Thorne (among other stuff) I realized how overt the Move was to do this. I guess with somewhat of a tendency to virtue signal through fandom nowadays it became profitable by accident? I wonder how long it shall last if so. But maybe that's putting on my cynical thinking cap too much instead of surmising as you said, leftists or people branded anti-right-wing/conservative for existing simply want media that shares their views or represents them to discuss and have fun with.

And finally. Super flattered that you'd think of my takes as "always reasoned", I try to take my time and think about what I'm putting out there so to see my efforts being acknowledged warms my heart.

[1tsjusty0u]

BOTW Models - Ancient Materials

ok so thisll be going over the in-game models. i'll leave a .dae file to play around with in blender, however for full reference material it likely wont be enough if that makes sense. some things arent properly rendered (ex. the giant ancient core) and as such i have in game footage for reference!

^ the lineup (please click for better quality.) theres some differences (white ancient core and demo/different textures for the slate. also a mini slate but i'll get to that. but otherwise this is all the materials. now lets get down to business

The Slate (ConductorDemo, in the files/Conductor in Creating A Champion (i'll also show that!!!)

+ broken? textures. its small because it was like that when i imported it; the bigger one i had to upscale and fix the textures by exporting them separately. i'll add some textures here but you can see them in the .dae folder

now some notes: 1. the textures arent even really used in the final game, and 2. the handle isnt supposed to be white.

(the blue outline is for how the slate clips to the belt because i just noticed that. reminds me of the yiga!!. also sorry for low quality thats. botw for ya)

as you can see!!! the handles supposed to be orange and such. ancient energy and all that jazz. for the creating a champion page theres more info for it :] (please dont kill me nintendo)

you can see the clips but also ancient energy! i have more facts about that however thats coming once we get to the ancient core. for now keep it in mind! also i dont think you can do that disassemble turn on and off thing in the art which is sad. however the pin for the bomb is still in game :D!!

2. Gears!!!!

gearsgearsgearsgears!!!!!!!! these arent as complicated as the slate because everythings in order with them

the little u's on the side actually can glow! well. sort of. only in guardians- as theres actually separate gear models (likely for animating purposes) in guardians!!! however the material itself cannot glow. probably because its disconnected from the guardian...?

in promo art the gears for the head stay blue, but the underside gears seem to turn pink. personally i think they just stay blue

3. Screw!!!

this is the same as the gear; as in, theres not much to it. its textures r fine and i dont think its animated so!!!!

i. dont know where these are used honestly

4. Spring!!!!

same as gear and screw- everythings alright with it 👍

fun fact im at the 28 image limit . well the limit is 30 but you get what i mean. so i shall do part two and attach everything there!

[beesmygod]

So TotK seems to be clicking where BotW wasn't. Any insight on what the key differences are that work for you?

note: i played botw up until the calamity ganon fight and then went "yeah ok ive played a zelda game before", put it down and never went back. didnt play the dlc

i dont think anyone would be surprised to know that im a "majoras mask was the best zelda" guy but the reason has little to do with the "darker tone" or the lore but because reusing assets allowed the dev team to greatly (GREATLY in this case holy shit) expand on the actual contents of the game itself. i love gold/silver best for the same reason.

botw is like running around an empty movie set. theres nothing in that fucking game. at the time, due to the proliferation of crafting mechanics infesting literally every AAA game, it felt like nintendo was more focused about hitting all the checks on a checklist of tired mechanics that were included just for the sake of saying they had it. crafting! weapon durability! open world! pbbbbt.

none of these things proved to be enjoyable to me. keeping in mind that ive been playing zeldas since the snes (skipping only a handful of handheld games), the changes felt like steps away from what makes zelda games unique. crafting felt like an arbitrary step between me and potions. i wanted to swing my master sword with power, not experiment with clumsy weapons that stop existing after i finally get a feel for them. and the open world, frankly sucked.

mm rewarded me for my curiosity. experimentation and exploration would lead to interesting or gratifying results (did you know theres a paper airplane in ikana canyon...). botw is like playing in the window xp background. theres barely any landmarks, except shrines, or anything to do outside of getting the yiga clan's ass. theyre easy to pick out because theyre literally the only people on the road. the world is put to waste; i cant play with it, i can just observe and be extremely artificially hindered by its vastness.

this doesnt really fit anywhere else in the above open world rant, but trading the shrines for small and sparce dungeons was a huge let down. i was hoping for a series of cohesive puzzles intended to help my mastery of my newest weapon or ability. you know. like a zelda game

totk fixed this and every other problem in the best way possible; the devs dumped a ton of toys into my playpen, gave me a hot glue gun, and told me to go buck wild. i love to build a horrible contraption to solve my stupid problems or kill me instantly. i love that experimenting with weapons involves actual experimentation if you desire or you can have an inventory exclusively full of spear type weapons with vastly different properties by gluing a bunch of rocks or monster parts to it. but most importantly....the "stock up->head out->explore->return" loop no longer feels like i have to go to the dmv over and over.

sure, the depths are artificially large in the way that the map in botw was; theres not a lot to do except reveal the map and do plot stuff. but the overworld was given a complete overhaul using the empty map as a starting point. theres actually stuff to look at, ruins to explore, caves to investigate, holes to jump into, and all that shit in the sky to explore. the sky map might be sparse but its meticulously crafted so that just the process of explorating the archipelagos feels like a puzzle you need to solve, as opposed to a hurdle you have to jump.

there is so much more to do in totk that im pretty sure im over 20 hours in and havent done any of the regional main quests. ive been running around picking up side quests, uncovering the map, exploring the depths, fucking around in the sky, and dying my clothes. but its not annoying or overwhelming. it feels more alive and less like a weird map in an abandoned gmod server. im having fun.

for crit: imo, one of the biggest criticisms i have for both these games is that the voice acting is horrendous. nintendo has too much money to be tapping people who sound like they just got out of the shenmue soundbooth. zelda was not improved by voice acting and they should probably go back to everyone just having short exclamations like "HEH HEEH!" or "hmmm...".

also link doesnt roll anymore and its really fucking me up. im really struggling here lol. i keep trying to do dark souls shit and every fight involves me accidentally zooming in with the sheikah slate instead of locking on, hitting l1 istead of shield, and whistling for my horse instead of drinking estus.

also nerf rain

[gay-jesus-probably]

So like, last night I stumbled upon your discussions of why a lot of TOTK’s whole… everything is messed up, and it had me thinking about it so much I had troubled sleeping afterwards. So uh, thanks for that lol (/lh). In all seriousness, your takes on how imperialist Hyrule is in this game, how much less like unique cultures the various towns feel like, Ganondorf being both completely flat and also seemingly not meant to be, and how weird it is that Zelda is back in power really put into words a lot of thoughts that had been nagging at me as I’ve been playing. Like, the amount to which the writing has suffered from BOTW is staggering when you actually lay out the problems. Out of curiosity, do you have any idea what the fuck happened? Like did the writing team change? The game had so much potential, as seen by the numerous fan theories/AUs etc. So what went wrong?

Honestly? I have no idea. I'm not usually that big on behind the scenes stuff anyways, and I'll be real here, I went into this game pretty much 100% blind - I didn't even watch any of the trailers, I knew NOTHING about TOTK except from a few details I absorbed from hearing other people talk about online (basically, I knew Ganondorf was going to show up as a talking corpse, Link would lose an arm, and the Master Sword would get rekt).

I rarely buy games as soon as they come out anyways tbh; I can only think of three games that I've actually gone out of my way to get as soon as possible after their release, and that was the 3DS remakes of Superstar Saga and Bowsers Inside Story (two of my favourite games ever, and Superstar Saga having literally been my first RPG), and I picked up the Mario 3D All Stars collection on launch day as a favour to my older sibling (who was stuck at work), and got one for myself in the process. The only reason I bought TOTK like a week after its release was because one of our dogs was literally days away from having a puppy, and so I knew that the next few weeks of my life would be entirely dedicated to keeping the other two dogs busy, assisting mom with the newborn puppy, and just generally being on call to provide literally anything mom needed as soon as she needed it. Which meant a lot of sitting around waiting to be required, and I'd need something to do that I could easily pause at a moments notice. So... new video game seemed a good way to fill the hang time.

And it was a good call, like I said, I've been having loads of fun with this game. There's a reason I've almost got 300 hours of gameplay, and it's not (just) because I haven't had anything better to do in between taking care of dog stuff (though that number is somewhat inflated due to me leaving it open and paused for hours at a time while busy with dog stuff). It's just that the story is a fucking mess.

As for what happened with the story... I have no idea. I've seen some people suggest that they might have been planning something a little more ambitious, and then technical limitations forced them to walk it back, so the story had to be hastily reworked to match. And I've heard that the abilities in TOTK were just ideas they had for BOTW that they couldn't fit in, which honestly I can see - the abilities are cool and all, but let's be real here, they aren't nearly as distinct as the BOTW runes. Magnesis, Cryonis, Stasis and Remote Bombs were unique powers with different uses in different areas; now the powerset is just Recall, Get Around Slightly Faster, Ultrahand, Ultrahand But In Your Inventory, and Ultrahand But Faster. But I don't know if that's actually the case.

But honestly, I really don't know why the writing is so awful. To be fair, some of it is definitely just the English translation team shitting the bed - like come on, they didn't need to have Sidon and Yona repeatedly exchange the exact same line about how he's scared she'll die like Mipha. They could have at least changed the fucking wording to make it sound more natural. And I know that other translation teams managed to inject some more nuance into the story - the French translation actually managed to call Rauru on his imperialist bullshit! For the throne room scene, they had Ganon refer to Rauru with 'vous', the formal form of 'you', but Rauru refers to Ganon with 'tu', the informal form of 'you'. 'Tu' is for use in casual settings or between friends, and if someone is using 'vous' for you, referring to them with 'tu' is a MASSIVE insult; it's very condescending, and implies that you have literally no respect for that person whatsoever, but they should continue treating you as a figure of great authority. To sort of translate that into an English equivalent, it'd be like if Ganon walked into that scene using formal language and referring to Rauru as a fellow King, and Rauru responded by treating Ganon like a small, dumb child. Hugely insulting. Also the vous/tu disparity has a History with French colonialism, so that adds some implications as to what Hyrule's really doing with their 'allies'. And in the scene where Ganon takes the secret stone, the French translation has him say Rauru tried to force him to submit, which is an outright accusation of imperialism (as opposed to the English saying Rauru wanted to control Ganon, which suggests the problem was Rauru thinking he could find a peaceful solution instead of just executing a foreign leader for thought crimes)

So the english translation definitely had the room to put some more nuance into things if the team had wanted to; honestly I kind of wish I knew Japanese so I could compare it to the original script and see if any of the problems I've been bitching about were part of the script from the start, or if the English translators were just particularly bad. But Nintendo is a very conservative company, and Japan is a very conservative country with a serious nationalism problem, so I kind of doubt it, especially since the game portrays Hyrule pretty much the exact same way that Japan is portrayed in propaganda justifying their own imperialism. That... does not suggest the English team went apeshit. That suggests that the awful shit was in the script from the start, and the English team was just totally on board with it.

As for the writing teams... I mean, to be fair it's been like seven years, of course the writing team isn't the exact same as BOTW. But honestly, the main issue is just that they've recycled a lot of old problems from the Zelda games, and somehow stripped them of what little nuance they had before. Like, Ganondorf trying to take over Hyrule because Evil has been an issue since Ocarina of Time (which this game was clearly heavily pulling from), but even though OoT never told us he had a deeper motive, the worldbuilding still showed exactly why he would have such an issue with Hyrule. We knew there had been a bloody civil war only about a decade before Ganon's takeover, we knew that the Gerudo were treated with disdain by Hyrule, and we saw that Hyrule's alliances with the Gorons and Zora were pretty flimsy, and neither race felt like Hyrule actually gave a damn about them. But most importantly of all, OoT gave us the Shadow Temple, a horrific prison meant to inflict unspeakable torture on its captives... all on orders from the Hylian royal family. Hyrule's hands were never clean. We weren't supposed to side with Ganon in OoT, but we were shown a long list of reasons for why he was so pissed off.

Someone else said that TOTK feels like a retelling of OoT that's just pro-Hyrule propaganda, and that's a pretty good summary. I don't know what the fuck Nintendo was thinking, but honestly it kind of seems like they're trying to stick to the formula of Zelda games at all costs, while also making the entire game just a huge 'gotcha' to all the fans that have spent the last 25 years seeing Ganondorf as a sympathetic character with depth and reasonable motivations. I find it ironic that they decided to include the Wind Waker boomerang and shield in the game, considering that the whole game feels like an attempt to get everyone to forget Wind Waker ever happened. That's still the most human we've ever gotten to see Ganondorf - he didn't have many lines in that game, but the ones he did have mattered. At the end of the day, WW Ganondorf wanted to have a better life for his people, and he knew Hyrule would never let that happen. But now apparently Ganon just wants to dropkick puppies into woodchippers, and he doesn't give the slightest hint of a fuck about trying to wipe out the Gerudo people entirely by attacking them with an endless sandstorm plus zombie apocalypse. His only character trait is Evil.

If I want to get really cynical for a minute here, I think it's basically just a cash grab. If your game prompts a moral debate, then it can offend people, which means they won't want to give you money for it. But if it's a simple black and white conflict with no nuance, the fans will love all the right characters in the right way, and everyone will love hyrule and want to see more of it! It's like the fucking MCU; they're not willing to tell a fresh story, or make any serious commentary. They just want something safe and formulaic that has been statistically proven to make money. Fucking cowards.

[ganondoodle]

still thinking about how even just the decision to basically act like the shiekah tech never existed is just ... so baffling to me

bc again you could have done all the sonau tech does with shiekah instead, and they were perfect to be explored more in a sequel, why wouldnt you grasp that potential, the literal building blocks for more??

if you are that tired of shiekah tech .. dont make it a fuckign sequel to the game prominently featuring it???? totk doesnt take place generations after botw in which things could have changed drastically, its just a few years afterwards??

you want to reuse the map and get rid of shiekah tech? ok fine take LINK into the past then and the focus is for you to find a way to return; do some neat twist where its revealed that link was the one who sealed gan bc he couldnt defeat him without zelda or something if you dare (they wouldnt)

want less work than that and still reuse the map and get rid of shiekah tech AND reuse characters? ok then make it some alternate universe thingy like majoras mask in which everythign is the same but also isnt, its weird and creepy how characters you thoguht you knew suddendly dont act like themselves, shiekah tech doesnt exist, malice is now miasma, etc, it would give reason to why you feel so much like something about this world is familiar yet also very wrong

as far as im aware every "sequel" we have had so far were either generations apart from the first one, some alternate universe or a different location altogether- in all of which its plausible that things are different, things seem weirdly familiar but also wrong, or that another continent just works different from hyrule

but totk does none of that, its supposedly just a few years after the first game, same world same character, but its BUILT like some strange jumbled mess of stuff from botw and new stuff out of nowhere that just .. doesnt fit, but feeling a strange sense of otherness, a déja vu of something you know but it acts off, like an imposter, thats NOT intentional and it shows, its a mess of botw stuff, from stuff that people missed from the old games and entirely new stuff; i dont doubt it CAN work but the way it turned out is like a mix of 3 different puzzles forced together and being told 'see it fits!' even tho you can clearly see the pieces dont look right in these places

again it feels like a sequel that desperately wants you to forget the first game happened, that anythign from it mattered at all

and that isnt really ... the sense of a sequel? why insist on it being one when it only creates problems? is it marketing?? just like it was marketing to call age of calamity a telling of what happened before botw but then it wasnt that at all and that is still the sole reason why i dislike it? bc i was lied to? totk is like 10000 times worse than that, its a main title and doesnt even have the excuse of yeah its basically an excuse to play all your fav characters in fun ways and the game beign well aware that being its main appeal; what is totk appeal? a toybox with botw aestethic and none of the flavor?

(on a sidenote; the sonau tech doesnt even .. matter? in botw at least calamity ganon was made of shiekah tech parts and him overtaking other tech is a big point, the sonau tech doesnt serve anything but .. idk minerus useless mech? gan doesnt even aknowledge it, he doesnt care, all it is is toys for the player, not link, but the player. the monsters mining the tech materials? what for? gan doesnt give a damn and they dont work for the yiga either??)

i said it before but it gives me the feeling that the way botw invited you to theorize, to look beneath the surface, the way it intrigued you and laid the groundwork for so many interesting things without denying anything.. was accidental? or perhaps put in the game without the directors noticing? i cant stop thinking about them saying sth like "after botw zelda wondered if the kingdom of hyrule needed to keep existing the way it had been before the calamity, but then totk happens" bc it just feels like they realized too late that botw naturally led into questioning the status quo and they scrambled to fit it back into a flat and boring road we have seen so many times before (or even worse really) with totk

zeldas character naturally leads into her questioning and reexamine their history and set of rules? we gotta teach her a lesson of why she is importante god given monarchy girl that has to keep it bc what if evil brown man shows up again for no reason

maybe im grasping at straws here but looking at it this way the sonau .. make more "sense"; the shiekah were a group that was under the rule of the royal family, and misstreated before (oh no look soemthing interesting) so they dont lend themselves well to be used for teaching zelda that lesson- the sonau however are tailored really to be just that; they are a supposedly godly race from the literal sky that founded this version of hyrule, that had tech even more advanced and better than the shiekah, she gets put in the past to meet the perfect god king of goodness personally, also his very fridgy wifey that zelda later replaces in a way, shes put there and treated like family and then gets to see just how evil that evil big man from the desert is, sonia is falcon-punched to death solely so zelda can feel obligated to take over her role, have her new, better 'family' hurt by gan; similarly so raurus sacrifice, look what a noble and good king he is, he payed the ultimate price to lock that evil man away, now zelda you cannot let their sacrifice go to waste, rebuild that divinely good kingdom like it was!!

and even though they go so much out of their way to put the cart back onto the rails of black and white-good and evil in an even flatter way than the old games, it still doesnt feel right, at least to me, it still feels like zelda shouldnt have gone along with all of that, it feels like even her character from botw was walked back entirely, except for the intro, it made her feel like a stranger to me-

because this is a sequel, i know this zelda, she wouldnt act like that after all that shes been through, this feels ... off

and it all just insulting to anyone who cared about botw more than surface level, or the zelda lore in general, i dont even care much about the timeline, but theres alot of lore and themes beyond it that felt ignored, especially so given that .. its a damn sequel, non AU, not generations apart, directly part 2-

but its not.

it even feels very "corporate", put zelda in a dress again, people liked that, put crazy abilities in the game to flashbang people with how insane it is even if its not the best for the gameplay or the story, put a new asthetic into it out of nowhere bc its 'new' and act like its been there the whole time, put gan in there bc people miss him and find him sexy even if his role is just as flat as that of an evil cloud monster-

*sigh*

you know, i saw a post that said aoc was like a bad fanfic (affectionate) and totk was like a bad fanfic (derogatory) and tbh thats like one of the best comparisons/summaries i have seen ..

[majorasnightmare]

Zora Worldbuilding Headcanons

Some core assumptions:

The BotW branch of the timeline is chronologically set AFTER the previous timeline, ie the events of ToTKs ancient past is set AFTER the last event of the Hyrule Historia timeline. essentially they all come back together to form one line that makes up ToTKs ancient era

The biggest effect on Hyrules topography was the flooding in Wind Waker. after an unknown point, the flooding ocean receded leaving behind the ruins of ancient Hyrule. at some point after that, the zonai settled parts of it and made the buildings wed see as ruins by the time of BotW. slowly the various tribes of hyrule immigrated back

all peoples within the setting of hyrule are loosely grouped into categories called tribes. in this sense, tribe refers a collection of peoples with shared traits, without anything concretely set in stone (for example, hyrule includes the tribe of hylians, the tribe of gorons, the tribe of koroks, etc etc. the main six who show up repeatedly can be considered the sage tribes (gerudo, hylian, sheikah, rito, goron, zora), and the various types of enemies can be considered the monster tribes (the blin tribe of bokoblin, moblin, bulblin, etc)

so with THAT in mind! heres shit that is almost entirely just Fun Background Context and worldbuilding that i mostly just rotate in my mind when working out events for that still-unnamed totk au

NOW UNDER A READMORE I FIGURED OUT HOW TO USE

@blujayonthewing @br1ghtpunk @trenchcoatofthelord

now in convenient bullet point form because if i dont organize points somehow my adhd ass loses the plot. this might get edited and cleaned cuz im posting this at 3 am

the zora are the tribe most heavily associated with the element of water. elemental water concerns not just the physical aspect of water, but conceptually is associated with the concepts of flowing time and change. as such, the zora show the highest degree of adaptation and physical changes

by the time of ToTK there are three descendants of Old Timeline Zora: the rito, who adapted with the help of valoo to achieve flight, and inherited the element of wind and forest from the kokiri, the "river dwelling" zoras that make up the current Zoras Domain and include Sidon, and the "reef dwelling" zoras that are further east in the oceans bordering akkala and include Yona. there are more than these 3 (only two of which are still zora as the rito have branched off so much and so long ago they are considered their own separate tribe) but these are the ones with the strongest presence in hyrule

the zora are very familiar with their own adaptable nature, and physical differences between different zora are rarely remarked on as its a matter of course. this typically confuses non zora when one refers to the rito as their air dwelling cousins, but to a zora this seems as obvious as the sunrise. some zora just evolved to fly, its that easy. they may not be fishpeople but theyre still cousins. zora rarely elaborate on this connection as initial confusion is misconstrued as confusion with regards to a zoras adaptable nature in GENERAL and not the specific connection between the birdlike rito and the fishlike zora

zora, overall, work on clownfish gender rules. personal physical traits can morph based on overall population and secondary sex characteristics adapt and change as needed. zora gender presentation, therefore, is completely divorced from sex characteristics and considered a matter of personal identification. clothing is essentially just fun accessories to jazz up your appearance. as such gender roles in zora society exclusively refers to whos doing what in procreation, but extrapolating habits, presentation, or identifying characteristics from those roles is deeply confusing. similarly confusing is the idea of differentiating relationships based on gender or sex characteristics (to a zora, all marriage is gay marriage).

well accustomed to change, the zora typically take cultural differences in stride and are known for their adaptable and friendly nature, though a perspective drawing root from the biology of fish exacerbated by an elf-like long lifetime means theres been a fair share of well meaning confusion and misinterpretations on their part.

the exception being the zora post calamity where, having suffered catastrophic losses and the death of their beloved princess, the zora of the domain reacted in their grief by becoming isolationist and traditionalist, in an attempt to staunch the flow of despair that was sweeping their lands. sidons ascension both as the champions heir in botw and the sage of water in totk metaphorically heals these wounds, helping the zora as a people embrace the everflowing nature of time and the changes they bring, as we must risk pain to fight for our happiness. by digging in our heels and keeping away, we prevent anything from getting better, letting the water stagnate. though the current may sweep us away, only the flowing river brings new life.

the zora, being the tribe associated with the element of water, react incredibly strongly to its presence. this is most visible with zora royalty. ancient tradition dictates the spiritual stone of water, the zora sapphire, be used as a wedding gift by the royal heir. proximity to such a powerful source of elemental water causes the zora ruler to grow steadily larger and more powerful as they age, as the spiritual stone is used as their marriage token. this is why the zora king is typically a massive individual, combined with the zoras long lives, one can get absolutely MASSIVE. this connection is also why the zora ruler is so powerful, as seen in king dorephan physically throwing a guardian off a cliff

following up on this, most zora cannot cast magic. the implied gender dynamics in sidons questline in ToTK deeply aggravate me and, imo, cheapen Miphas skills as a champion, as yona and other female zora are seen performing the same healing magic mipha was known for, and then purifying water in sidons place (so why is he even doing it if he can just take shifts??? anyways). adjusting for this, magic is, by ToTK, an extremely rare skill to have. even the presence of the spiritual stone does not imbue one with the ability and skill to cast magic dorephan may be powerful, but he is no mage.

in that vein: yona and her attendants have no healing magic. they demonstrate their compassion and dedication to helping with the crisis by tediously and thoroughly treating the sludge-affected and wounded zora in the domain by hand, scrubbing them clean and tending to them with non magical medicine. mipha was not born a sage, and in truth had very little magical power, and a shallow connection to the magical element of her people. what was remarkable was the sheer skill and razor point efficiency with which she used what little magic she had, generating returns that so outclassed her power that it seemed a miracle. this is why mipha was so short, as zora grow in proportion to their connection to water, and miphas connection was constantly stretched to its limit by her compassionate nature and determination to heal and save all she could

as a change to ToTK used in the au, and also a headcanon: miphas court was not always a source of water for zoras domain. once the sludge crisis began, polluting the waters around the domain, a wellspring of clean water sprung up as if by magic underneath her statue, flowing downwards towards the zora. the area is well explored, and there is no immediate logical explanation, leading to it being widely perceived as miphas final miracle (which is not far from the truth. vah rutah generates water from nothing, and even in death mipha cant help herself but to try and save her people, watching over them still)

zora religion is a matter of significant cultural importance, and to the surprise of no one, features a heavy emphasis on water. zora, overall, are deeply spiritual as a rule, and this shows clearly in their architecture and their noted tendency to dedicate massive structures to religious worship and celebration (and often time such structures work both as a spiritual source of worship and as a practical location with a designated function. nearly all water temples are explicitly religious, and they also tend to double as water plants in some fashion)

frequent interaction with the hylians has meant that the zoras have had PLENTY of time to comingle and embrace hylian culture and religious concepts, to a degree that often surprises and shocks your average unaware hylian. the zora are somehow more gung ho about hylia than even THEY are (hylian culture and religion are for another post, but in general hylia worship is treated as a subtle background element and is rarely brought to the forefront of active attention or behavior. by contrast, the zora have an organized religion focusing on her with a dedicated priest role)

the heavens above are a vast starry ocean, the dwelling place of spirits, and where the horizon meets the sea, the dead can cross over from one plane to another. the rivers below are a muddied reflection of the starry rivers above, and where life is brought forth in the waters below it transitions to a new form in the waters above. the shine of the stars is the glint of light off the scales of celestial zora, and reflective metals like silver help them find their kin in the lands below

"all waters meet in the ocean" being a zora idiom about how many different concepts will often lead back to one solution, and how many different peoples can find unity at a single destination, regardless of how dissimilar they may initially appear

an emphasis on the flowing mutable qualities of water is reflected both in the zoras conception of identity (prone to change as time and circumstance changes, both metaphysically and also physically) and also their spiritual practice, focusing on the nature of spiritual transition from one state to another

hylia thus takes the role of guiding shepherd in this instance, symbolically aligned with the sun. through hylias light, the spirits of the dead find their loved ones in the living world, who in turn can see the sparkling glint of their scales in the heavens. as disaster clogs the river and buries the dead, hylias light reflects off the water to help guide them to the horizon line

out of all the tribes, the zora have embraced hylia the most, and openly incorporate hylian iconography into their own religious symbolism, and through the generations have had their own dedicated priesthoods to her, a tradition which still continues, albeit more casually, to this day. zora churches to hylia are considered some of the most beautiful in the country

zora do not worship a creator deity and instead attribute their peoples birth to the amorphous and chaotic nature of water itself, though there has been many minor religious figures taking the form of guiding spirits who aided in their creation by guiding the malleable form of the zora into one more closely resembling their current state

included in these guiding spirits are historic protectors of the zora people, including the water dragon farore and the great fish jabu jabu

the shared heritage with the rito is attributed to the nature of leviathans, who both dwelt in the ancient oceans (jabu jabu) and also roamed the heavens (the windfish, levias) and is considered a minor fact of life not really exciting enough to dwell on

a fun little aside inspired by my replay of skyward sword: the water dragon being the source of elemental water sage magic for the zora, and the water dragon uses her power to imbue the lake she resides in with a kind of magical purity, allowing her to grow whatever she wants in its waters (ie salt content or lack thereof does not affect the lotus blossoms or coral growth, as they draw upon the magic in the water to filter what they need). she is the source of elemental water for the zora, and thus has the greatest mastery over it, demonstrating skills other sage descendants cannot yet replicate. in time though, sidon may be able to imbue small bodies of water with that purity, allowing salt and freshwater organisms to coexist when otherwise theyd be unable to

the waters of the divine springs are not elemental water but instead the divine waters of the sacred realm, and are instead closer to elemental *light* than anything else. the springs will never diminish, nor dry up, and are as deep or as shallow as needed

the zonais interaction with the zora was a bit of a reversal of typical first contact enlightenment. the zora have a long history of stellar plumbing systems and engineering, to such a degree that first contact resulted in the zonai learning and adapting zora blueprints and methodologies for the construction of the water temple sky island