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i would not survive wayne manor if i had to stare into dick's y/n blue orbs everyday
stop looking at me with those eyes! (again &. again mini drabble)
ft. post-kidnapped reader w/ yandere batfam shitpost
reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.
— masterlist ! ; related post !
thank u for sending this oh my god, i need to write about this!!! i absolutely love your art style for the reader, they're so handsome i'm crying and laughing 😭😭😭 and it's true!!! i will also die if i look at the entire family's eyes as a filipino who has never once stared at a foreigner's eyes because it's just so bright huhu.
unfortunately for your case though, your refusal to look straight at them just translates to extra unwanted counseling sessions with the family in one of the large expanses of the living rooms housing the available members for a meeting. it's a whole gathering where you're the center of attention.
and it's not only dick involved, it's also all the other blue-eyed bastards and an additional glowering, pair of green ones which shines the brightest of them all— and if not for cass and duke's dark colored peepers, you might've truly passed away because it's no joke that their eyes glint under the light passing through locked windows, especially when the sun is at its highest peak and hits at just the right angles to glisten.
not only have you no physical escape, but their obsessed stares never leave your form too, devouring and locking you whole in your place and claustrophobic to the chains of their bright-orbed gaze.
"(name), dear, as much as you don't wish for me to address the issue; it's becoming an unhealthy habit that you refuse to maintain eye contact with the family. it doesn't help that your heart palpitates, you perspire more often, and you make excuses to run to a different room when you do. what's wrong?"
you don't even have to look up from staring at your lap (as if you want to, hah!) to know it's your father's voice directed at you. it's a unique tremor that reverberates across the room and commands attention from all corners; yet when he speaks to you, it's coated with an unhealthily sweet reverence that seems completely foreign to someone who has never once spoken to him until now.
"u-uhm..." stuttering, you bite your lip, drowning in your own self-preservation that had you ignoring dick's stealthy steps to your seated body on the couch, only for his fingers to carefully graze on your chin, snapping you out of your attention yet being too late as he lifts your head up, forcing to stare at his wide-blown eyes.
they're unnaturally bright today, shining more than the beaches in those private islands bruce owns, it's even more terrifying that he's staring at you.
"it's unfair too... baby bird, that it's me you avoid the most," he groans, it grates at your ears but it was better to focus on your other senses if you wish to control the ever-living fear of miley cyrus' blue eyes burned right into your retina, now associated with dick's emboldened ones. his palms find its way to either side of your head, cradling it side to side, the contact forced you to continue staring ahead of him. and no matter how much you resort to blanking out, the intensity of his baby blue eyes forfeits you to focus on anything else.
yet it's the gentle graze on your side that encourages you to speak your mind, you really hate how infantilizing this entire scene feels, and comical that they're - dick - is taking your excuses too seriously.
"ah... well—" how do you explain that you're shit at eye-contact because, first, and can't deal with their luminescent stares pinning you down to your spot, brighter than diamonds and emerald crystals, second?
"everyone's just too... you know. i- i really can't explain without it sounding... uhm..."
"too overwhelming? too what? akhi/akhti? it has been years since we last took you in, and you've been perfectly communicating with us until now. what has changed? has that rebel, todd, dare to make another deal with you again which involves refusing to properly communicate with us? with me? because if he did—"
damian's voice slithers with conviction, condemnation and possessive threats that strike fear into your heart with every venom-laced word. if not for his head nuzzling into the shadows of your neck, the dichotomy of dialogue and action, you would've been convinced he's out to kill you instead.
yet the same gremlin muttering insults is your little brother who takes the entire space beside you on the velvety couch, rendering you completely cornered by his expecting glare. except now, unlike the mental torment he subjected to you, his green-eye gaze glimmers with concealed adoration you've learned to discern, he's always been a heckler for your attention; the tan hands wrapped around your waist in a snuggle tightens, not too tight that it deprives you of oxygen, but demands your answers instead.
like father, like son. as the saying goes. always finding solutions with unwanted affection. couldn't even push them away without them interpreting your actions as rebellion which only results in more uncomfortable competitions on who gets to cuddle you for longer.
and wait, no, they didn't take you in, bullshit! they basically kidnapped you. it's only that you've grown accustomed to dealing with them individually and as a group, but because they've been more lenient with technology, providing you access to wifi with supervised search results, you stumbled across one of , which not-so faintly reminds you of them.
your past traumas of them replaced with jaded motivation to survive and tolerate the ever living plague in your life you call your family.
bruce did advise you to associate them with positive things instead as a first step to your adjusting phase, and miley cyrus' anthropoidal, not-quite human stare isn't negative in any way, yet it's also by no means negative, if not unsettling— which leads you to a common ground, a common affiliation which helps you cope with the fear that they might harm you and isolate you with loneliness even further; forgetting your presence once again.
learning to love them was hard, so relating them to anything comical was way easier on the still-heavy burden in your heart which yearns for freedom burned off through countless of escape attempts, the grief of your mother's death now decades worth, and just the shock of it all that they're still interested in you until now that hasn't worn off still, despite the years passing by quicker than blowing off a candle-light.
still, everyone retains their gaze on you, never once breaking contact with your form as if you're capable of escaping their grasp. you try to look down, but to no avail, dick was too invested in hogging your head all to himself and nuzzling it in his toned stomach, whilst damian refuses to separate from his ever tightening hold which renders you unable to full grasp your thoughts and speak.
god-damned hypocrites.
"holy shit..." it's tim who broke off the silence, muttering under his breath in disbelief whilst his hand fiddles with the modded tablet bruce had given you as a christmas gift. his lanky finfers continue scrolling eyes fixated on the scene before him, every expression illuminated by the faint glow of your tablet's screen. the most visible feature, gazing at him through whichever was left of your vision unobstructed by dick's body; was of course, his widening blue eyes, as it seems like he'd hit jackpot with his appalled reactions.
it seems like he found the exact same picture.
would it be a bad thing now if you'd run away from the room once they all collectively hone in on the image before them? or is it too risky of a task?
honestly, with just how routine your life must be right now, you'd prefer to run, to feel the air run through your hair, to bask in the sun washing your body in its warmth.
maybe to find unbidden joy in another game of cat and mouse, or it may be another one of your excuses to avoid those piercing eyes once more if even by just a mere fraction.
or maybe you could stay for now, because is it just you, or did you actually succeed in traumatizing them for once instead of you?
#🌷... yael's works#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere#yandere dc#yandere dc comics#yandere batfam#yandere dick grayson#yandere bruce wayne#yandere batman#yandere nightwing#yandere damian wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere robin#platonic yandere#male yandere#soft yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#yandere x gn reader#yandere x male reader#yandere x darling#yandere imagines#yandere batfamily#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batboys#yandere batfam x neglected reader#neglected reader#yandere scenarios
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au where gabriel uses the peacock instead of emilie, and she's the one left with two miraculous and a child
she inherits the gabriel brand. it's her brand now, ppl have to know it or it doesnt count, but changing name and logo isnt great for business-- people want to buy gabriel, not emilie, so the g is now for graham de vanily. she and adrien change their last names to match, and soon she is cleaning them from gabriel entirely, before his death can stain her as gabriel's emilie, rather than just emilie. she needs them to love her. she cared for gabriel, but she has no use for a husband who can't love anything anymore
she starts dating nathalie to finish cutting all ties with him. it isnt really fair on her, emilie just needs her to tell ppl she's moved on. but it's good to know she's beaten gabriel in one more bid for devotion
its funny. she never resented him much in life. in death, she notes he has more billboards than her up in the city. her billboards now, but theyre his. in death, she sees him over her shoulder in her mirror. she gets cast as a grieving widower in her next performance. she gets the hint. she seizes the hint and throws it out the window. she takes the role and pushes for more agency for her character. she cannot be truly loved without her agency
speaking of. adrien doesnt get to go to school. he follows her around most days, and he smiles when she asks. he never took to the stage, but he's an actor in his own right, in his own way. and he's hers.
and it's not enough. nathalie's love grows lazy as emilie breaks up to cause a scandal. they script it out themselves. nathalie watches adrien out the window. emilie kisses her to turn her gaze back. adrien is always in the garden. she tells him to come inside. she tells him to love her. it used to feel less hollow.
she wishes she could be sure it was all true
she wishes.
she wishes, and nathalie is warmer when they have a mission, so emilie know this is the right thing to do. they know what they have, and what they need, for a wish
emilie transforms, and makes a monster of someone's love
suddenly, the whole world is watching
two girls come out with the cat and ladybug. adrien is safe at home. two girls come out and they're heroes and they're here for her. for her!
nooroo loves her. nooroo says that, at least. she could care less, busy in the glory of her enemies' company, drunk on magic, having the time of her life with a purpose reborn. this is where she is meant to be-- centre stage, on every screen. they set their phones to notify them of her presence. it's always a surprise and they're always quick to know. the news loves to see what she makes. nathalie says she's straying from her goal, if she cares. the people say she's a monster. they just don't understand love
in the end-- in the end the heroes practically offer themselves up to her. there are more of them by then. she wasnt expecting it to be so soon, or she would have dressed for the occasion. would have made a spectacle of it. adrien had been dragged into their circle. they chose a bad miraculous for him. she shouldn't have let him stray from his mother
they're just tired of her. it's been a year and emilie graham de vanily is a recluse. butterfly attacks are constant and emilie barely exists anymore. it was beautiful, though. but they're tired of her. they're sick and they hurt and it's her fault, they say. they're breaking and it's her fault. that's love, isn't it? isn't it? it tastes beautiful. she built this all out of love, do they know that? the feelings just look so heavy and pretty and she's so good at making them hurt.
we're tired, they say, again
she takes their miraculous. she gets to her wish. what did she want to wish for again? love. she wanted love.
she sees gabriel again. it's been too long. she didn't like that love. when it left she had nothing. he was everywhere, and-- he was nowhere. she doesn't think about that often. but it hurt. she didn't like that love
does she want real love? she had a family and one's dead and one's a traitor and one's torn and one's in england and who the fuck knows what happened to the rest of them
the spotlights were good, though. she danced so well. the heroes are all still watching. they want to know what she wants. they're interested.
in her.
she wishes. she wishes for it to never end
so it never does.
#its midnight. fuck#emilie agreste#emilie graham de vanily#mlb emilie#emilie butterfly au#mlb au#mlb#miraculous ladybug#ml ladybug#ml emilie#eminath#nathalie sancoeur#adrien agreste#mlb nathalie#mlb adrien#ml nathalie#ml adrien#gabriel agreste#mlb gabriel#ml gabriel#writing
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how does it feels to be loved by skz? <33
How Does It Feels To Be Loved By Stray Kids
Bangchan
His love feels like a sacred descent, a pull into depths where nothing else exists but him and the way he makes you feel. To behold him as you both lie together is both agony and salvation, a beauty that binds you even as it drags you under. you sink willingly, deep into his love, a place where divinity itself would falter. Even the gods would forsake the heavens to witness what you both have which is a love so consuming it bends the stars, leaving nothing untouched but the void you both create together.
Minho
His love feels like a storm, fierce and consuming, pulling you under as you drown in the chaos of his sorrow as Minho has so much in his soul. you gasp for air, but he steals it away, leaving you breathless in the frenzy of his touch. you know his heart is already half-gone, planning its end, yet you cling to the fleeting moments you both have. In the heat of it all, love and destruction blur, tangled together in a primal dance, that's just how deep his love feels. Under this light, Minho is yours, and you are his until the sweat turns to blood, and even the night can no longer hold you.
Changbin
His love feels like a slow burn, an unspoken war between the fire in you and the barren distance in him. He won’t show his love often, won’t surrender, yet you would keep knocking at the door of his solitude trying to get a piece of him because his love feels addictive. Changbin's love kills you slowly, surfacing only when he’s alone, like a ghost haunting his own heart. you might give him more than you owe, yet you remain trapped in this exhausting charade, drawn to the violence you can’t seem to resist. Yes his love can be rough. He craves a melody to soothe his soul, while you find solace in the aching silence of him.
Hyunjin
His love feels like a relentless ache, a failure to remind him of what he’s living for, even as you give everything to bridge the distance it's never really enough for Hyunjin. you would need to trade your heart for his indifference, drink him in to soothe his doubts, and swallow your own desire, choking on the weight of it. you would long to steady his conviction with the certainty he deserves, even as it leaves you hollow. Nights without him feel like an amputation, a phantom pain. Yet, you will live like you have got missing limbs for him, dragging yourself forward in the hope of being enough. Because Hyunjin's love feels like there's always a part of him that still doesn't belong to you
Han
His love feels like a chokehold, tight and unrelenting, leaving you gasping but unwilling to break free. he would tear down your walls, turn them to gold, and offer everything he has just to bring you home. Han is the light you cannot reach, the truth you ache to see, even knowing it might shatter you. you crave his love like a wound that refuses to heal, and though it robs you of sleep, you would feel like you rather lie awake in the pain of him than dream in his absence.
Felix
His love feels like a miracle, something rare and unearthly, unlike anything you have ever known. Felix's love is more than a dream, more than you could ever dare to ask for, a presence that leaves you breathless, standing in awe of his light. In him, you find a beauty that defies reason, a love that feels destined, yet utterly unexpected. he is singular, unmatched, and irreplaceable, exactly like his love
Seungmin
His love feels like forbidden fruit, raw and intoxicating, leaving you trembling with desire and reverence. He tastes like new flesh, something untainted yet electric, a sensation that ignites every nerve. When he says your name, it echoes like a sacred hymn, making you feel both alive and unworthy.his love you would want to claim it, because it feels so divine. In seungmin's presence and love, you are both exalted and humbled, consumed by a love that feels too perfect to hold.
Jeongin
His love feels like a ship lost at sea, drifting toward a harbor that will never be yours. you anchor yourself in hope for his taste while he searches for a way to stay moored, never daring to set sail. Still, he is full of the love you seek, waking beneath its weight, reaching for you on faith alone. Jeongin's heart remains locked, its secrets just beyond your grasp, and you falter often with his love, fumbling with the wrong combinations over and over again. Perhaps he is simply saving his love, guarding it for someone you can never become. Or at least that's how his love feels
#stay kids#stay kids astrology#stay kids headcanons#stay kids imagines#stay kids scenarios#stay kids reactions#stray kids#stray kids astrology
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Amara de Riva wasn't always known by that name, but she's had it the longest. The first name her mother gave her was Halevuna, because her birth came quick and sudden in the night time just like the clever fox when he comes to get the chickens. Growing up it never felt like it fit her when they lived in Wycome. Felt better that one year she got to spend with the Dalish after her magic came in. Her mom pulled some strings with the clan's First to teach her how to not get possessed (kid's pretty sure her dad is one of those Dalish) while she found a better place for Halevuna.
Her mom said goodbye to Halevuna seemingly for good a year later after talking to her sister and her Crow nephew. Halevuna would be sent to Antiva to be trained by a family with close ties to House de Riva, unfortunately a better choice than the Kirkwall Circle (Ostagar said they were closed during DA2ish times.) She was gifted with an Antivan name by her mother: Amara. In northern Antiva it means grace, immortality, but in southern Antiva it means bitter, like her mother is at this turn of events and how she assumes her daughter will end up. (spoilers: she doesn't)
See, Amara never really caught on about what her name meant at first. But she thinks its pretty, it fits her better than the more elven name given at birth. She loved hearing stories growing up about Antiva, she spent her earliest years there with her mom, aunt and cousin and she remembers none of it after they go back to the Free Marches. The Crows, always a fascination for her.
While she's being trained as a mage (and other Crow Things) she picks up the nickname Smoke by her magic instructor. Because, you know, where there's Smoke there's fire. Sometimes (more often than anyone wanted) very literally. This family didn't really want a mage Crow to be that powerful so she ended up experimenting with magic a lot on her own instead of being taught aggressive magic through lessons. She didn't mind the nickname at all, worked in her favor sometimes. Made it easier for her smaller infractions to go unnoticed in favor of the big ones.
It’s Monday Morning 👎👎👎🚫🚫
It’s the Rook Introduction Hour ! 🥳🥳🎊🎊🙌
For new people, it works like this: I ask you about your Rook, and if you want you can rb and answer, and then I’ll rb it back here and comment a bit !
I really made you all work last week, so let’s do something easier: What is the significance of your Rook’s (first) name? Who gave it to them— did they pick it themselves? Do they have any nicknames (besides Rook)? Who gave those to them? Do they like their name?
Feel free to answer as much/little as you like!
#oh how cool- at least its still monday here :)#amara the crowsona#ok i did the trickster ending and was like what animal is also trickster coded oh right fox#want to give her a new nickname that's like 'tricked the god of trickery'#foxes seemed like a good option to work with for that#amara de riva#rook de riva
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୨୧ ‧₊˚ joseph's love languages ˚₊‧ ୨୧
pairing: j. woll x fem!reader summary: how does joe show his love ?? hmmmmm... i wonder.... word count: 620 warning(s): FLUFF, briefly hinting at 18+ content, not proof read notes: i'm a firm believer that some people have all the love languages and i think joe is one of those people !! i hope you enjoy baby !! xoxo
gift giving / acts of service (since they are very similar to me)
⟡ joe comes from a big family with many siblings and cousins
⟡ he is very used to everyone always giving everyone else something when they come for holidays, parties, and reunions
⟡ joe takes that into your relationship
⟡ less in a "here's a present" way and more in a "i'll take care of you way"
⟡ never lets you pay. for anything. ever.
⟡ kinda insulted when you suggest it early in the relationship
⟡ he plays pro sports. believe it or not, he can afford to pay for your taylor swift tickets and your vanilla cashmere lotion
⟡ he insists on it so much that you have his card in your phone
⟡ "joe, i really want this-" "put it on my card" "joe, can we get-" "on my card" "joe, i'm gonna ord-" "card, baby, just put it on my card"
⟡ he also buys you a personalized jersey from every new place he plays in
⟡ when he plays in NYC or LA and you are there, its shopping day for you
⟡ you buy absolutely anything you want and then. give him hauls
⟡ he calls them "shopping haul with joseph woll"
⟡ two dozen flowers every week and they are always your favorite while also matching the vibe of the season (red for christmas, pink for spring, yellow and blue for summer, etc.)
words of affirmation
⟡ believe it or not, joe is vocal as hell abt his love for you
⟡ talks about you non stop with the guys on his team
⟡ texts you as much as he can
⟡ "miss you like hell" "love you more than hockey" "gonna win for you, sweetheart"
⟡ he lovesssss pet names
⟡ his favs he calls you: baby, doll, sweetheart, princess, honey
⟡ might add babygirl into the mix when things get... heated
⟡ he likes to change it up and those are the most common ones
⟡ his favs you call him: joey, joe, babe
⟡ he loves how simple and personal they are
⟡ joe ends every phone call with an i love you because he wants it to be the thing you remember the most
⟡ loves the intimacy of whispers
physical touch
⟡ loves touching you but it's never pushy
⟡ hand holding is his favourite
⟡ have you seen this man's hands ?????? they are MASSIVE
⟡ he loves how delicate your hand feels in his
⟡ HUGS. FROM. BEHIND.
⟡ rests his chin on your head and watches what you are doing
⟡ forehead kisses and kisses on the cheek !!
⟡ thinks those are good for group settings
⟡ maybe a quick peck on the lips in public
⟡ has no problem with small amounts of PDA but he is a modest man
⟡ at home/in private, he loves long kisses and cuddling
quality time
⟡ toronto has lots to do. trust me.
⟡ joe is always planning fun little dates for you
⟡ often they include a sweet treat or a full meal and lots of walking
⟡ traffic in the city is bad and you both live downtown
⟡ walking anywhere takes max 20 minutes
⟡ even when you two stay at home, joe is doing what he can to make it feel special
⟡ loves slow dancing in the kitchen with you
⟡ one of his earliest memories is coming downstairs early one morning to jazz playing and his parents dancing in the kitchen
⟡ sits with you while you do work
⟡ enjoys watching you concentrate and the peace and quiet in the house
#⋆. 𐙚 ˚ angel writes; joey#nhl fanfic#nhl#nhl hockey#nhl players#nhl imagine#nhl fic#nhl fanfiction#hockey#hockey players#joseph woll fanfic#joseph woll fluff#joseph woll x reader#joseph woll
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Regulus: You're not here.
James: Well, we don't know that do we? Did you fall asleep on a rooftop again?
Regulus: Thanks for the vote of confidence in my sleeping habits... and no, I haven't been up here since the last time you brought me.
James: Ah.
James: How've you been?
Regulus: As all right as I could possibly be... considering.
James: considering...?
Regulus: You left me. You died.
Regulus: and it's Halloween night again. you've been dead a year, James, and here I am talking to a ghost.
Regulus: I wasn't like this before. you made me like this.
James:
Regulus: And I'm glad for it. In a devastating way.
#how much am I going to turn oc scenarios into these guys?#though this one definitely strayed way more than they usually do#its really just names more often than not#marauders#marauders era#fuck jkr#fuck jk rowling#regulus black#james potter#regulus arcturus black#hp#marauders incorrect quotes#I wasn't bothered to write a scene so I just wrote the dialogue#so like everyone says about James talking to the regulus star but what about just Regulus talking to the sky and hoping James can hear him?#or talking to the sun I suppose but this is set at night how I see it#starchaser#jegulus#sunseeker
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I draw a sketch to simply offer my own personal little headcanon and theory that Zenos was the only other descendant Emet got close to (knowing him probably unintentionally) besides Lucius.
Obviously we never see them interact directly, but several little worldbuilding tidbits do make me ponder about certain things, like the possibility lorewise that it could've been Emet that named Zenos, and the fact that they share certain habits and potentially interests.
#ffxiv#concept#fan art#sketch#zenos yae galvus#solus zos galvus#emet selch#ffxiv spoilers#potentially I suppose#just wanted to draw something sweet#and maybe it was also an excuse to draw little baby faced Zenos before I work on some other comic ideas#obviously I still don't think Zenos got a lot of warmth from Emet especially as he got older or think that he really raised him directly-#however#the theatrics- their tendancies to nap when theyre bored- and the fact that Zenos is a garlean who's name is greek rooted not roman#those little parallels just makes my writing brain go brr#though I will admit a part of this characterization was also inspired by the april fools manga#and its cute that even not directly involved- and often causing him more trouble than anything- that Emet was looking out for Zenos there#like its not canon#but I hope that was meant to still be fully in character- I adore the little bits of interaction and characterizations we got#it is also interesting to me that his name (iirc) is supposed to mean 'gift of zeus'- and he turned out to be quite literally gifted
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As I said I would, I drew my oc with yours my beloved @clawdouobit
My pretty girl likes to infodump your pretty girl about the smallest things. She's like a reel, talks a lot but most of it is meaningless.
Close ups and more info because I can't shut up ehtier under the cut <3
20 years old and engaged to a half-foot. They're waiting to gain some more money to get married and leave the dungeon. Note: they're best friends but idk if what they have going on is truly romantic love or just a very good friendship.
Quite skilled at upper levels, but wouldn't go to lesser levels. She isn't skilled enough to make her party survive there.
Her race is a mix between gnome and half-foot. Idk if that's possible but I don't think it's not.
If I had to guess, she's 13/14 on half-foot standars. It's unclear whether she's an adult or not, but she's preety mature most of the time. Most.
Flushed cheeks always. Also very pale.
She's 109 cms tall, a lot more than avarage on haflings, but lot less than avarage on gnomes. Since she hangs out mostly with haflings, she's a giant woman. This gives her some problems with traps so her BMI is 18 due to diet.
Fwens with Shahad. Who knows why tho. We gotta figure that out ;}
#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#dunmeshi oc#dungeon meshi oc#never thought i'd make an oc for a fandom again but here am i#shahad is so cool#she wears pretty jewlery#i love her design so much#but i hate drawing kobolds ooouugh i struggled but did it :')#they're so fwens#the divorced traumatized kobold and the little to-be braid she found while dungeoning#pimpacci can shut up when asked. for about 10 minutes at least.#i have 2 other dunmeshi ocs i made alongside her but i think Shaad would get along better with Pimpacci#because she's really kind and caring. but doesnt realizes her talking can get tyring/annoying.#while making her i noticed all haflings cover their necks on the dungeon. i wonder why. i gave her a scarf to match the thing#shaad#pimpacci lukes#i had so many trouble coming up with her name#i had to make it sound like two names mended together that don't tire the tounge because its too long to say it..#she gets really annoyed when someone calls her “Pim” because of cultural things.#also. she's often infintilized. many hafling don't know she's a mixed race. so she just looks taller and more childish than others her age#it doesn't bother her. she doesn't realizes most of the time. she doesnt infintilizes herself on purpose. she's just younger on perspective#yay#i need shahad and pim to have late night hours talks. it would be so interesting..#i should be asleep lol#my oc#my art#i've made a mistake on shahad eye colour... too late but... grr ...
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Trigun Manga Reaction
Now, back to Volume 1 Chapter 9!
Insurance Ladies know they are going above and beyond what is normal here. But, they still continue as consummate professionals.
THIS IS SO ADORABLE!!! SO CUTE SO CUTE SO CUUUTEE!
I like the tiny little details that hints something about the characters too.
The most obvious things are Milly's childish expression (playful) and Vash's one leg raised on the seat position (gremlin). However, "no nonsense" Meryl's feet are placed inside the table's rings! You'd expect her to put them by the side of the table but nooooo!!! They need to be IN the ring (she's not above them all!). LMAO.
Tbh... I think the Kaite & Vash relationship feels more fleshed out here in the manga than the anime. I guess it's because of the Rem conversation. It added more weight to their interactions.
Also, they're adorable! Kaite is one sharp kid calling out Vash's bullshit. Vash, like a dog with a bone, keeps deflecting.
Oh wow. This is a huge difference from '98. Kaite was totally alone when he approached the crew.
And this is just as painful and hard to see because, you can absolutely understand the crew's reaction and feelings. What Kaite did was wrong. At the same time tho, he is just a kid who didn't know better. Taking out their grief and fury on him is not right.
Gosh... It makes me think of Little Vash and The Great Fall.
I wonder what exactly went through Vash's head here. In my perspective, Kaite is reflecting Vash unknowingly in this scene. But it's so painful because he's just a kid. He should never have been put in this position. He is too young to be on this path for atonement and redemption! It's just wrong.
Hmmm. Another big difference. Interesting. The Plant was never mentioned in '98 at all.
So, Tristamp followed this manga arc more closely. Some elements are remixed such as Wolfwood replacing Kaite, the Gung-ho Guns substituting BDN as a threat, and the race is avoiding destroying a town instead of avoiding falling off a cliff. All beats are the same tho.
HOWEVER!
I think '98 has a more logical timeline personally because they are in a hurry to stop the ship right? It's a critical moment. If you think about it, there should not have been enough time for Vash to regroup with Kaite after the duel. So, '98 having these two events happen simultaneously is actually good.
Another benefit is Kaite's offer to help feels much more genuine when he was alone and away from Vash in '98. It really sells the idea that this is entirely his own decision despite the risks of retribution.
Of course, Vash didn't influence him in the manga too but by visually having him there with Kaite, it kinda undersells it imo.
Oi. Vash. That's no way to talk about your sister!
While I do appreciate the changes on the Plant design in Tristamp, I really like the '98/Manga more. They're both excellent designs for Sci-Fi but I just really like the 90's flavor of magical Angel Power Plant... which appeases my thing for magitek.
Tristamp tho is a modern flavor of alien Faerie Power Plant - not bad but not my cup of tea. However, the glowing lines feature is wonderful! It reinforces the idea of them being power plants because they have "circuits" in the body. Restraining myself from saying Magic Circuits!
Oh... This is a really fascinating set of panels that I think both '98 and Tristamp haven't adapted well.
'98 kinda skipped this. However in Tristamp, the emphasis on Plants is very clinical. Not sure if that is the best way to describe it, but, in the plants feels so much more objectified in Tristamp. I guess the horror element about the human-plant relationship is further emphasized there.
It's contrasting the manga which seems to be more focused on the awe-inspiring side of it like in the scene above. The scientist waxes poetic and is practically making a religion out of the whole thing.
I guess, to put it simply, the manga effectively shows how humans see Plants worthy of worship. Meanwhile, Tristamp displays how humans see Plants as just a life-essential battery.
So beautiful... Oh...
What if the re-design happened because animating expressive individual feathers would be a pain for Orange staff? GASP! Is that why everyone's hair were cut short?! Because hair is tedious to animate. OMFG... IS THIS WHY MILLY WAS CUT OUT IN SEASON 1 since she really really long luscious locks?!
I kid. I kid. 🤣
Oh. That's really clever remixing by Studio Madhouse. So '98 Miss Purple Avenger Episode is like a "Prototype" of this manga arc. This is where Vash having to prevent an explosion of a Plant came from.
Okay. Another great difference... I've been saying that a lot in this chapter. Sorry.
In '98, Vash dealt with this alone and the only witness was terrified. It focused more on the mystery.
However, here in the manga, Vash is not alone. Humans must work with him to save the Plant and everyone. He can only buy time but it's up to them to stop the whole thing. It's a really nice display of Vash's hopes and beliefs regarding human-plant relations. ----> BTW, the art in this page is really pretty and interesting! (1) The almost "gradient" like transition of Vash's coat to the bulb is so creative. (2) The drawing of the Plant resembling a blooming flower: feathers as ray florets, the plant/sister as the disk floret, and the wires as receptacle/stem.
These pages are so gorgeous and the way the slowing down of the heartbeat was shown through the interspersed tiny panels is just really good.
ROFL. The human instinct of "I don't know what's going on but it's helping so I won't pry anymore and I'll just roll with it!". Love to see it!
I think this arc is so good because it justifies Vash's often criticized brand of hope - his endless patience at giving humans chances to bridge the gap between their species.
Humans can work together and save themselves with just a little push. They won't rely on exploitation forever.
People can realize when they are wrong. They can atone and redeem themselves. They do not stay cruel and ignorant forever. They are capable of change. ----> Also, this art is so perfectly adapted in '98. This page, actually, all the pages relating to this collective effort of humans to save the ships (with a bit of an assist from Vash) is so heartwarming to read. ----> Oh... Kudos again to '98 because since they relegated the 'Vash prevents a Plant explosion' to an earlier episode, the episode covering this particular plot had him out of commission. So, the stakes have become higher. Humans must set aside their differences and work together to save each other and Vash too.
And finally, humans are more than what they seem. They are complicated. What could be an enemy at first could turn out to be an ally that can save you later.
This entire conclusion to the conflict is just good and very... Vash. This is what he wants for Knives to see and understand about humans.
I think '98 really did well in adapting the essence of this arc. Tristamp is complicated because now, on hindsight as I read the manga, the episodes are basically hard-carrying and working overtime telling multiple plot lines at once!
Let's see... in Tristamp's version of this arc:
Wolfwood was working double time in the narrative as "Kaite" and one half of the "Good/Hope of Humanity". Not to mention he has his own conflict going on too.
Meryl was the second half of the "Good/Hope of Humanity" that works with Vash (Plant) in saving people.
Unfortunately, with BDN being replaced by the Gung-ho Guns, there is nothing that echoes the "Hidden Depths Enemy Turned Ally"... character...No way... OMFG! WOLFWOOD WAS SUBSTITUTING FOR THAT ROLE TOO IN THIS ARC!!! Poor Woofwoof!
Roberto is a unique addition since he is a Tristamp OG, but I think he represents well the approach taken by Orange with Trigun. He is like the "Flaws/Indifference of Humanity". He is good but experience had turned him into someone that's jaded and refuses to rock the boat (unlike Meryl). His age and 100% ordinary human status prevents him from surviving long enough to change his disposition too (unlike Wolfwood). It's pretty in line with Orange's more emphasis on the "darker" aspects of the story.
WHA-?!!!
Eh? Eh? EHHH?!!
WHY WAS THIS CHANGED IN '98?!!! THIS IS ADORABLE AND COOL!!! AHHHH!!!! NOOOO!!!!
But... then there won't be Meryl and Milly supporting injured Vash. NOOOO!!! Augh. AND THERE WON'T BE TRISTAMP VERSION OF THIS! AHHHH!!!!
Oh. So, the singing is in the manga too. That's a surprise. I thought it was a '98 original scene.
Awwww. ಥ_ಥ
#trigunbookclub#trimax journey#this was a really great arc#i like how the anime adaptations stayed true and diverted from it in their own ways#'98 broke it into two different arcs#tristamp reworked it with different characters and wove other plots into it#it's nice and i'm glad nightow okay-ed this kind of work#because we can enjoy the different ways the story could be told without losing its core elements#kinda like... fairytales! or the many versions of king arthur!#of course it would only work if the people adapting the story truly understood the essence of the original and respects it#because sometimes - actually correction - more often than not people just create 'in name only' adaptations#however '98 and tristamp are definitely not one of those#but i'm still miffed at how brilliant diamonds neon was handled tho i hope he shows up somehow in tristamp s2!#omfg next arc would have woofwoof right?!#i'm so excited!
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why does every article reporting on idf war crimes go "hamas, who started the war on october 7th with their brutal terrorist attack slaughtering innocent israeli civilians, has condemned the idf's use of-"? like, nearly verbatim every single time. we know about october 7th. we know by now. half the time, hamas isnt even relevant but they gotta find some way to sow doubt and numb any potential compassion responses. will you get fired if you show sympathy for murdered palestinian civilians without first adding a disclaimer saying its all their fault for being born in gaza? if you call "palestinians under 18" children? if you use the words "murdered" or "brutal" or "massacre" for acts that didnt occur on october 7th? if you call a spade a spade? why are israeli reports front page news without proper fact-checking but palestinian reporting is always "allegedly" even when theres video evidence? why does the idf not get the hamas treatment of reminding everyone that theyre biased before treating their words as law, like they havent been caught bold-faced lying again and again?
#soooooo fucking infuriating#'palestinians are allegedly starving but thats what hamas (who are savage terrorists in case you forgot) said as well so who knows?'#'idf soldiers are allegedly bragging about and showing pictures and videos of their war crimes on social media but#its not in english so we may never know what theyre saying. palestinian ''civilians'' are translating so whatever they say must be wrong'#'in other news. heres what ''doctors'' are referring to as a ''calendar'' but is written in arabic (terrorist language) so the idf must be#telling the truth when they say its proof they are all evil and must in some nebulous way suddenly stop living'#to be fair. the 'secret hamas names list disguised as calendar but REALLY about oct 7' shit was the target of skepticism quite early on#but it really does show how often the idf lies to justify obvious war crimes#maybe they should provide verified evidence or even just be given a bias disclaimer before printing their claims as fact???#every single fucking death toll is phrased as 'hamas-run ministry of health reports death toll of x' like?#yeah? thats their fucking government? what else do you expect?#you do understand that the healthcare portion of their government is probably more reputable#than what the phrasing of those headlines are obviously trying to imply?#i understand that bias is still possible there but its not armed combatants making shit up#its doctors who receive govt paychecks doing their best to identify the disfigured bodies not buried under rubble#youre not slick with that wording
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most annoying thing about being me is that i cannot engage with like. any fanon shit about dennis because i'm constantly on some advanced derangement and the stuff i thought two years ago when i was first getting comfy in the fandom is still the way everyone else looks at dennis but i'm like. yes but its Worse than this. you're like a quarter of the way there. this isn't the interesting bit, this is a symptom of it, keep going.
#ada speaks#i tried reading fic. i got probably 5 minutes in and was like hm i dont think i can do this#it doesnt like. piss me off. it just also does not interest me in the least#that post going around the other day got me thinking too like fjsmbfkfkj#i think maybe macbrain often causes ppl to come to the wrong conclusions too but 🥴#like i see so many people apply the same logic that makes sense with mac to dennis and it's like whoa. wait a minute. huh??#we're doing the catholic guilt thing here with him...? you think he's got a complex with that?#you think den's been anything other than openly queer since the show began ?? jdehkbfjkherbfjh i dont know man. where are you getting that.#dennis' shit is so far removed from anything else i think you NEED to understand him in a vacuum before applying individual circumstances#ie. when trying to understand dennis' behaviour Around Mac i don't actually think it has much to do with mac at all#or at least nowhere near as much as ppl give him credit for lol#he's just. like that. he's behaving perfectly in line with himself just not. with anything else. its not that complicated really#i also don't think that he hates himself nearly as much as everyone seems to think#conversely. also nowhere near the narcissist everyone makes him out to be.#still cant get over the absolute deranged interaction i had on twitter a while back where it was like.#''dennis isnt legitimately interested in Anyone because he's too in love with himself.'' like hdksbkfngmdjshdkfjfndj LOVES HIMSELF??#first of all the SINNED system is right there and those steps and that GOAL Mean Something secondly fhkfnskjrjdkbsnsnfnfk#meanwhile i was talking about some fic concepts & hcs a while back with a friend and they were like youre straight up writing plural dennis#like. ah. yeah. victoria is an alter. somehow i've written this while being like. hm. what IS victoria to him.#these two are distinct people coexisting in this body and dennis still *exists* even after coming out and transitioning...?#but how can i even begin to talk about this when i don't agree that much of anything in canon points to this. it's like.#i dont think brian lefevre or hugh honey or his random personas are alters. its specifically victoria and a few other instances#and victoria isn't even. a thing. glenn just conveniently gave a 'canon' name to a thing i was Already conceptualizing but its? not canon#anyway golden god firefighter and victoria manager. hello. anyone. dennis and victoria co-fronting.#this is more about. IFS than DID but it's.#idgaf about the macden other ppl froth at the mouth over im inside dennis' brain poking around i find them fascinating but not like that#(there is something wrong with me)#genuinely wish i could enjoy the stuff in the tag and the stuff that showed up on my dashboard regularly this is a curse DBKSBFMF
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Constantly thinking abour karen wheeler btw but in a way that makes everyone here super madsies
#my problem is that when ppl say they like their female characters problematic they mean#'i want them to have flaws that i can blame on the nearest male character' and tbh thatd so boring and also. pretty infantilizing?#tbh to the point where its like do you guys even get karens character or. anyways.#like So Many Thoughts#like shes either the narc emotionally abusive mother or a victimized angel 🥺🥺🥺 neither of which is true btw#im so pretentious i like to think that i get where karen fits in the fabric of st's themes#i think positioning her as a 'freak' kind of defeats that? bc karen to me always seemed like the opposite#shes attrative skinny formerly a cheerleader charismatic white and suburban. shes literally a white boomer named karen.#all of that is complicated by the fact that shes also a woman who was raised in the veryyy conservativ era of the 50s#shes very much someone who is smart but also follows the tides and only really rebels when its the popular counter culture to do#like her at the pool in s3 with all her other housewife friends#and its like so easy to get what ppl say about her mothering skills but it often gets pushed into very black and white discourse#like karen obviously cares about her kids but its a case of actions mattering more than words and performance#like karen will TELL mike that she wants him to talk to her and shell hug him when shes supposed to (performance) but when mike had symptoms#of ptsd? karen punishes him. but also ptsd was not super well known back then#but what im saying is that karen PERFORMS but is she actually a safe person to go to? i think thats what her arc is about#like thats why the mikekaren hug at the end of s4 was important bc not only does she hug him hut she also makes it clear she doesnt want to#lose him#its that reassurance after a traumatizing event from a parent that kids and teens need!#i think karen does what she thinks she is supposed to do but also i think shes the typical white boomer who lacks a lot of self awareness#in how she treats ppl#doesnt make her a bad person. honestly i think shes a good person#i think when all characters are humanized and flawed what separates a good person from a bad person in st#is whether they like to inflict pain (like brenner) or if theyre just a flawed human beings (good but nuanced)#girl whos been thinking abt karen all day <- me
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#dont call anyone im safe im fine im just venting. tw for suicide/self harm/kind of intense language. ideally no ones reading this tho#bro i cant keep living like this#i dread waking up every day so much that i dread even falling asleep#i got insomnia medication in my system and my brain is still like nope absolutely not#i cant keep up at my job even when i am rested enough#i get headaches every other day#my instant mental reaction in the face of stress is to hurt myself (i have not)#like fuck. i work for the disability department of an insurance company#i know for a fact that (probably) every contract stipulates we wont cover disabilities as a result of self inflicted injuries#which is supposed to prevent ppl from taking advantage of the system or whatever#and im always like if someone goes to the lengths of actively injuring themselves to the point of disability#in the name of 'getting out of work'#that person is not 'taking advantage of the system' THAT PERSON IS FUCKING MENTALLY ILL#AND I WOULD KNOW BC I AM ONE OF THOSE PPL#do not come for me on some shit about wanting to disable yourself being morally questionable i cant be concerned abt that rn#i gotta focus on the fact that i hate my life so much id rather break my own right hand than continue it#its an improvement from the active suicidal ideation but its still a symptom of the passive ideation#fucking hell. im too self aware so i absolutely feel like im faking it or making shit up so i can be lazy and not work and whatever#but FUCKING CHRIST theres no way. if i had a choice i wouldnt let myself feel like this.#i just got to a point where i can live alone and support myself. i was so happy and so proud of myself. I don't want to lose that#but god every phone call i have to make for work makes me want to hurt myself. every early morning (and there arent many!!! i mostly work#from home!!!) makes me wish i was dead. i have to sleep for hours after work more often than not. i cant really maintain my living space#theres fucking. mold and discoloration and shit on a bunch of my clothes and some of my bags and shit!!#cause i cant fucking keep my room clean and my basement apartment got fucking humid over the summer and so much moisture got trapped#i constantly have dirty dishes getting moldy before i get to them#i just dont have the fucking energy. i want to take better care of my space. i want to be more social. i just want to go to sleep without#fucking dreading waking up. i wanna go a full week without a headache. i want my stress response to be something other than the intense and#overwhelming desire to cut myself. if i start again i dont know if ill be able to stop and i know i wont be able to keep it to my arms/legs/#easily hidden parts of my body. last breakdown i escalated to my face and i know ill pick up from there.#fuck
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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Honestly I'm glad that I spent so much time orbiting radblr as a TRA because it led to my views changing, but I find it to be totally creepy behavior now that I'm on the other side of the fence (hello kettle, I'm pot!). Like, I pretty much avoid transgender spaces unless a mutual or somebody I love is engaging with them. So when I see anons that are clearly sent by people who not self identify as radfems, feminists, or "terfs," but still orbit this area often enough to follow our drama, that is weird af to me.
In hindsight tho, radblr totally does (or did) have people doing the same to tra blogs. Toppdyke used to be famous on transblr, and there were anonymous harassment campaigns targeted at various trans blogs (usually blogs run by afab people 🤔) that look very similar to the harassment campaigns we see on radblr. It's like no normal feminist or trans person wants to start an argument online, so instead these social spheres experience the worst of both worlds whenever they meet.
#it took a long time to create a tumblr feed that wasnt deeply irritating even after becoming a radical feminist#like a Long ass time. and most of the people i follow now are not radfems#(or at least. they arent radfems in name even if thats the theory they most often discuss)#idk if its more toxic than the trans community (which was eating itself alive 3 years ago and according to my nonbinary - is still doing so)#but its certainly full of a lot of bad people and is honestly not a good way to learn about radical feminism#which is sad to me bc my life got so much better when i learned how feminism could help me#i really think it can help all women and all TIFs but the hate campaign against any kind of feminism is so overwhelming#and radical feminism is pretty much unheard of outside of the terf acronym these days.#oh i went off a lot in my actual text id just like to put it on record that i Know that not every troll on radblr is a TRA#and vice versa there is a mixture of bad faith actors harassing trans people. in fact i think both groups are targeted by right wingers#bc we are easy targets. but i was never a right winger so i dont have personal experience with them the way i do with TRAs and feminists
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I adore Dishonored2 and I will never talk badly about it but also god fucking damnit this is one broken game (/affectionate)
#li.txt#dh#truly a bethesda title#I know its technically not bethesda and bethesda only released the game#but I swear by stamping their name on the game they broke it#I have yet to go thru a mission where something doesnt break on me#some of them are annoying but more often than not theyre just really fucking funny#(nothing beats the way the clockwork mansion broke on me tho like that was humiliating and hilarious both)
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