#its ok u dont have to sugar coat it with at times. i KNOW i forget to change ppl's face shape a solid 85% of the time <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[stealingpotatoes]

you are like hella fucking cool. yea sure your faces might follow the same blueprint at times but the way you execute other people asks into art and yet draw your own stuff with that unique charm is just admirable. absolutely gorgeous. i hope you do well in any endeavor you might partake. also that potato you have as ur icon is fucking cute. the colour palettes slap, they are cute and light and fit ur vibe perfectly. anyway keep doing ur thing ur good at it.

AHH omg thank you so much!!!!!!!!! this is so sweet I need to lie down on the floor for a bit I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY STUFF,,, i don't even rlly know what to say back this is so specific and lovely!!! here have this 3d version of Little Potato Bastard Man i did a few months ago

[tscmu]

Some headcanons for the Hq boys and how they propose to their s/o?

HI YES THIS IS THE KIND OF STUFF I LOVE WRITING ABOUT PLS okay so u didnt really specify which boys so im gonna go for ones that i can picture proposing that sounded weird ok-

characters; koushi sugawara, satori tendou, kenma kozume, osamu miya + tooru oikawa oK LETS GO

koushi sugawara

- pls he’d make it so heartfelt and meaningful HHH I LOVE HIM~ - he’d want to make you feel how much he loved you, like actually feel it in your heart - i feel like he’d tell a FEW people, probably only get daichi to help AHAHAH - bruh asahi would probably have a mental breakdown and tanaka would snitch💔💔 - but he’d have an idea of what you both wanted i think, you wouldve spoken it over before defos - he’d want it to not be that public, just the two of you - so it’d be at like a hiking trail you both go on or something, a place that means loads to both of you but isn’t there for the world to see - and then...…came the day - he knew how much you picked up on little details so he had to be sneak sneak ten thousand™ - “hey, wanna go out on that one walk up *insert name of place idk*? ok ok ok i’ll get ur coat sugar” - EEEEEEEEEEE - he was trying his absolute best to keep it together - he knew you’d most likely say yes, so he wasn’t TOO scared, but it was still SCARY LIKE- - and then u got to the place he wanted to propose - it was this place where you always stopped, where there was a little bench (with your initials STILL carved into it from all those years ago) and it looked out over a nice view - “ooh, can we stop here again!” “u-huh i was actually gonna ask-” - bro he almost forgot the speech daichi read over to him about 20 times - but HE DID IT WOOOO - he didn’t want to make a MASSIVE deal out of it, the wedding would be more important to him but he still wanted to make you know how much he adored you - speech included lots of memories dating even back to before hed even SPOKEN to you i stg this man - AND U SAID YES!!! u have no choice. u did.

satori tendou

- i feel like he’d be kINDA similar to suga?? - a little less caring - he’d never actually pictured himself getting married tbf- - he never thought he’d actually find the right person so he just....gave up idk - BUT THEN YOU CAME INTO HIS LIFE- - even with you he hadn’t really thought about marriage, he was just focused on having fun with you, but then ushijima was like ‘...so, tendou. when is the wedding commencing between you and y/n.” and he just- - it was actually when they were sitting there he started to plan it - ushijima would SEEM like the worst person to go to, but he was actually quite good at this stuff - so in about 2 hours sat at the back door of tendou’s work, they had sketched out a sort of plan on the back of a spare napkin - there was one main thing he knew he wanted to talk about - how you always stuck by him, no matter what he did - he thought he’d seriously fucked up, and you would be back at his door the next day, smiling and chattering about this new café you heard opened down the road - god, he was terrified to even mention paris to you, but you were so up for the idea, it took him by shock - he didn’t take you for granted - so for once, he wanted to make you feel loved - they couldn’t think of a place to take you for ages, but then it hit them - you and tendou always went to wakatoshi’s games, ever since high school you both always made the commute if you had the time - and ushijima had a game coming up in two weeks...…. - when he mentioned it OFC U WERE DOWN PLS, you loved going back to japan - like ofc france was incredible but......... it was just lovely to see everyone again ;-; - since youd been there so much, you basically just got to stand right at the side of the court AHAHAH - so they won the game. obviously. its ushi and kags we’re talking abt here. are you kidding. then tendou started acting weird, which made u hella sus - it was the first time in what felt like years you’d seen him so...nervy - he kept fumbling over his words, you had to yell at him to speak up - but eventually he did it - he spoke abt how much you meant to him, how you made him more comfortable in his own body, how you stuck by him through everything - AND U SAID YES. AGAIN, U HAVE NO CHOICE. - and yes ushi and kags started cheering and the news outlets put u on the news i dont make the rules ok

kenma kozume

- ok mans is TERRIFIED - he’d quite genuinely never thought about marriage, throughout his years with you by his side it just...never crossed his mind - but it was when you were lying in bed one night, his arm dangled over you as you both drifted in and out of sleep - and it just hit him - why the fuck were you both still like this? - marriage was something you always expressed a love for, when kuroo got married you were basically in a trance the whole time - how was he so unaware? - people described kuroo’s proposal as pretty much perfect, he’d always been good at reading his partner, so he just used that knowledge to make something he knew they’d like - so, to kenma’s extreme distaste, he went to kuroo - oh my god kuroo fucking c r i e d - kenma was finally ‘growing up’ - so after about an hour of kuroo sobbing, they finally got down to business - after lots of.. lets say elaborate ideas from kuroo, and lots of no's from kenma, they finally came to a sort of compromise - since you and kuroo worked in the same department, he would text you on saturday simply asking if you wanted to catch coffee and talk about that one assignment - obviously, you said yes - not thinking anything of it, you just pulled on a jumper and jeans AHAH- - then you notice,,,why tf is he taking u to a beach at 7pm in march???? - #serialkillerkurooheadcanons - but u see kenma and ur like... wtf have u gotten yourself into- - have they been possessed?? who knowz - and then u get BLINDFOLDED LIKE WHAT - but then u snap back down to earth like why would they kidnap u- - as kuroo takes it off, kenma’s quite literally shaking - poor babie - he never really knew how to explain his thoughts properly, so the speech wasn’t anything extremely dramatic and/or romantic - but he did in a way tell you how much you meant to him - he spoke abt how you boost his confidence, have always been there whenever he needed you, and how you seem to always understand him when he’s being at his most blunt - therefore he thinks you’re his soulmate - PLSPLSPL IM CRYING

osamu miya

- i think he always knew he wanted to marry you - atsumu always embarassed him about it- - it got to the point you didn’t actually think he’d propose, you would just wake up one day and a wedding dress would be on the door - but it got to the point where tsumu was mentioning it significantly more when you went over for dinner - mama miya was always telling you how happy she was that samu picked you - even your own parents were being oddly warmer towards samu, whenever they phoned they asked how he was, etc etc - so you knew something was up - samu was always really polite to your parents, asked their permission before he even took you out on a date - ironic because you lived together but still- - so turned out, he actually mentioned proposing to you to them - they adored him for gods sake so of course they said yes - then tsumu thought he was acting weird, so he told his side - jesus christ they freaked out - his parents were always nervous about atsumu, who slept with random people on the weekends, and hadn’t been in a proper relationship since middle school - you were basically their god send AHAHA - so it was a massive deal when he wanted to marry you - it would appear that he didn’t really care, but in honesty it meant the wholeass world to him - like suga, he’d go for a location that meant a lot to both of you - christmas was a huge deal for both your families, they both came together and you had an incredible time - and last year some of the jackals came over, which was just hilarious - so what better time than christmas with your loved ones around you??? - it started off like a normal christmas, you had an incredible dinner ( cooked by none other than osamu ((with atsumu and bokuto attempting to sabotage it but just burning their hands on the pot)) ) then all played some games - but it was when you were all watching the basic christmas tv programmes when the atmosphere... changed - everyone was looking at you and samu, even sakusa looked excited - it was when his father muted the tv, and samu took your hand, your heart was basically beating out your chest. - he spoke about how he felt like, for the entirety you’d been together for, every day he seemed to fall more in love with you. you were like his rock, when things were even a bit off he could just come to you and you’d automatically make him happier even just by looking at you - bruh bokuto and hinata were sobbing in the corner

tooru oikawa

- surprising, but he never thought about marriage - he just kind of assumed he’d be one of those people that would be in a relationship for like a week then just.. move on to another person idk - that was until he ran into you - everyone, even his own parents, said he was a different person when he started dating you - it was ironic, you were quite similar to him - yet you made him rethink his fucking morals  - it was sappy asf - ANYWAY BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND - he took this proposal really seriously, he wanted it to be the best moment of your whole life - until the wedding ofc ofc - since you’d basically changed him as a person, he wanted this to just show his appreciation for everything you’d ever done for him - he wanted you to feel his love - and so he set about preparing a good proposal - he’d be like osamu, and definitely ask your parents first - your parents loved him anyway, they thought he was the best thing that’d happened to you for a long while - he basically knew what he wanted to do - nothing too public, but nothing too quiet - whats the point of proposing if some people dont see am i right??? - sometimes when you both either a) needed a break or b) you both had a period of time where you were free, you both just booked an impromptu holiday AHAHHA - #richkidtingz - so obvs he had to do it on one of them... it was ur thing after all?? - it was when you walked in the door, face red, and flopped down on the sofa next to him, he grasped the opportunity - “..got any spare holidays from work?” - you quickly went on a travel agent website and booked a three day holiday to brazil, leaving the next morning - it was one of your favourite places to just escape to, so it made sense for him to propose there tbf - it was as you both woke up the first morning there, still sleepy from the night before, you grinned at eachother. - “hey.. get ready quick, i wanna do something.” “wHAT-” - he didn’t actually know where to do it, he just called a taxi and asked for your favourite high street HAHAH - after about an hour of browsing around shops, your hand never out of his, you finally asked ‘what did you want to do?’ - his breathing almost stopped i stg, he didn’t realise how scared he was - but then... HE DID IT POGGERS - he stuck to what he knew he wanted to speak about, making you sob in the process ofc - and even all the locals congratulated you!!!

--------

HI THIS IS SO LONG IM SORRY BUT I LOVED WRITING IT PLS!! THANK U FOR REQUESTING da box is always open mwah

[tobi-tobi-tobi]

I have been iNfoRmeD thaT a bRitiSh chOcOLatEs poSt iS useFuLL anD aS somEwhAt oF an eXpErt I shAll hapPily obLigE (not at all an expert just eat a lot :)

Righty let’s start shall we - CADBURYS - probably the biggest chocolate brand in the uk it has loadS of chocolate bars (also just looked on Wikipedia anddddd Cadbury seems to be EVERYWHERE so I’ll just go through some of the things that they do that are most popular)

Dairy milk MMMMMMMM YUM

Most famous probably - just a solid plain old milk chocolate bar tAsTes blooming brilliant tho

They also do loads of flavours of this bar but I’m not going to go into all that

Crunchie - again YUM

It’s a honeycomb thingy coated in chocolate and it’s sO sweet but AMAZING DJDJ and yeah that’s a crunchie

CURLY WURLY djejieie yEs

It’s all WIGGLY and some sorta toffe caramel thing coated in chocolate and tastes UGEJJE and it gets stuck in your teeth and JDJDJD yup

FReddo is a frog bar that tastes fab

Then what else do we have hmmmm OH YES

Double deckers - not a huge fan but if I’m given one I’m not about to turn it down

Also I doNt really know what’s in it only that it’s sugar and it tastes damn good (some sorta marshmallow I think)

Flake - loVe (not as good as a twirl coS it goes EVERYWHERE but still delicious)

Then there is aaaa tWIRL MY FAVOURITE CADBURY ITEM IT IS JUST *chefs kiss*

And yEs its basically a flake coated in chocolate but IT TASTES SO MUCH BETTER OK

And last of the Cadbury bunch there is a wispa - Y U M

It’s a chunky bar with teeny tiny little bubbles in it MMMMMM

Right what else do we have oh yes the bounty

Right the bounty is HORRID (I know some people HATE IT and some people LOVE IT it’s a bit like marmite actually)

WHO IN THERE RIGHT MIND PUTS COCONUT IN A CHOCOLATE BAR HUH? The bits get in your teeth and it’s just HFJDJDJDJ RUBBISH

Lets move swiftly on shaLL WE

The MILKYBAR! - its a white chocolate bar and tastes sickly but blooming fantastic at the same time

Oh yeah and there is this little cowboy guy on the front too :)

There is a Twix AND HOW HAVE I ALREADY HIT THE TEN PICTURE LIMIT IVE ONLY JUST STARTED DJDJJ IMMA HAVE YO JUST EXPLAIN THEM THEN SHALL I TUMBLR DOES THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY?

Twix is caramel biscuit and chocolate in a gold wrapper (delicious and popular)

Snickers is nutty and caramel and chocolate and biscuit and I don’t like but it is also popular in a brown wrapper

OH AND I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT THERE IS NO KNOWLEDGE OF ZE MALTESERS and that is *bows head* unfortunate but they are little round biscuity things coated in chocolate and they melt in your mouth

Ummm whAt else oooH

Aero and mint aero they are bubbly chocolate bars and I don’t like the mint buuuut they good

AND THEN LASTLY COS THIS POST IS ALREADY TOO LONG NO HANG ON A SECOND I FORGOT CHOCOLATE BUTTONS THEY ARE SMALL BUTTON SHAPED PEICES OF CHOCOLATE AND THEY ARE WHITE OR MILK CHOCOLATE AND DO A GOOGLE COS I CANT SHOW YOU THANKS TO TUMBLR

FINALLY WE HAVE TJE HOLY GRAIL OF ALL CHOCOLATES THE WONDEFUL THE AMAZING THE JUST PERFECTION OF THE GALAXY CHOCOLATE BAR ITS JUST SO SMOOTH AND HEAVENLY ANS DHSJ UGH THAT ANS A CUP OF TEA DHJDJDKD YES YES PLEASE

AND THERE YOU HAVE SOME OF THE GREAT BRITISH CHOCOLARE BARS AND UNFORTUNATELY I COULDNT INCLUDE A PICTURE OF ALL OF THEM BUT YES HOPW THAT HELPED WRITING OR SOMETHING ELSE YOU MIGHT NEED IT FOR - TUMBLR IS FULL OF RANDOM USELESS STUFF SO I THOUGHT ID ADD SOME MORE

@thatsmartidiot24

(Feel free to add to the list anyone who wants to :)

[bangtans-peaceful-piegon]

My Cup of Tea: Prologue

My Cup Of Tea: Prologue | YoongixReader

Warnings for this Chapter: none, just a post-breakup suffering OC who is saved by a whole Min Yoongi

“Coffee is bitter, so people add a little bit of sugar or creamer until it suits their taste. However, once it’s added it can’t be separated. It’s also addictive, it’s your choice to keep it as your poison or to control how much you take. Some people need it, some people don’t...In that case, it really isn’t their cup of tea.”

A/N: im finally deciding to post this after who knows how long sajkdfhd,, tysm for beta reading this for me @jtrbluv !!! again u were a huge help because the tag game you tagged me in gave me the final push to actually post this fic thats been collecting dust in my drafts. ily boo !!! <3 it also took a while because i wanted to do more research for this fic. i dont think ive read about or drank so much tea in my life for the past few months. pls enjoy the prologue everyone!

Word Count: 1,600+

You sat in the worn out leather booth, eyes trained on the steaming mug in front of you.

What just happened?

Something that took five years to grow ended in mere seconds.

Five years of dedication.

Five years of convincing yourself it would work out, that it could be fixed.

Five years spent on a relationship that should’ve ended before it began.

You mindlessly took a sip of your coffee hissing as the hot brew burnt your tongue, mind drifting back to the argument that occurred hours ago...

“You’re never here!”

“Was I not enough for you?”

“Where’s the old Y/N that I knew and loved?”

You weren’t sure about what was said after that except for... “I’m seeing someone else.”

The bruising pain on your tongue began to throb and you couldn’t help the tears that formed.

You never liked coffee, but the café was your favorite place. 

Perhaps it was the enticing aroma that attracted you every time you walked in, or maybe it was the cleverly thought out name that was in the form of childlike puns: Bearly Awake Brew.

Either way, you couldn’t despise coffee any more than you already did in this moment.

“Are you alright?”

You whipped your head up to see a man standing above you.

Through your bleary eyes you could make out a set of kind brown ones shielded by black frames which rested atop a boopable nose. On his head, a black mop of neatly trimmed hair along with soft cheeks paired with a soft jawline.

The man was dressed in a black turtle-neck and long-coat as if returning from a meeting discussing the newest stocks and bonds of business.

After a small, possibly noticeable, ogling of the stranger, you shook your head ‘no.’

He motioned to the seat across from you raising his brows inquisitively, “May I?” 

This time you slowly nodded.

He seemed harmless enough, and even if he tried anything there was pepper spray in your purse.

You sniffled as he took a seat.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No y-you wouldn’t understand.” He leaned forward onto his elbows—a determined furrow in his brow.        

“Try me.”

Who was this guy? He didn’t come off as threatening but somewhat… familiar.

You couldn’t quite place his face or remember his name.

“Not yet, right now I just need a good cry,” you replied sinking further into your seat.

“Alright.” He said, shrugging and not saying much, or really, nothing.

He sat across from you— not making eye contact but quietly observing the café.

Several questions raised in your mind: Where did he come from? Why is he here of all places? Did someone send him with the intention to make you feel even more like a fool than you already did?

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you asked when the silence became a little too long.

“No, not really...” he replied slowly. “Would you like me to leave?”

“No, I mean, it’s just-“ you hesitated, “You’re fine,”

“Ok then.”

Silence.

One look at him and it’d be hard to believe women find him approachable, but the man came up to you.

Much less, while you were on the verge of outright bawling in the middle of a café.

“What’s your name?” you asked, initiating conversation. You might as well since he was there.

“Yoongi. Yours?” You hesitated knowing it wasn’t fair to not give him your name.

“I’ll reassure you I’m not a stalker, at least not the bad kind.”

You let out an amused scoff, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

He chuckles and you couldn’t help but enjoy the sound.

Were you really that joy deprived?

“Ok then, I’m Min Yoongi, and I’m a stocker. As in I distribute and track merchandise in stores.” he reaches a hand out to shake and you can’t help but stare at it.

“Well go on I won’t bite,” you huffed a laugh, taking his hand and shaking it.

He smiles and you can’t help but return it.

Who is this guy?

“Why don’t we go for a walk?”

You contemplate his offer.

You had just met him but you hadn’t had casual conversation in a while… or hung out with friends for that matter. So maybe it’d be good for you after-

“Sure let’s go,” You replied immediately while standing up, maybe a little too quickly— your chair scratching the wooden floors and making a startling sound as you headed to the door.

He raised his brows in surprise at the sudden burst of energy before trailing behind you, ignoring the stares of café patrons.

“Hey wait up!”

-

This was another reason why you visited the quaint coffee shop often.

The park outside was always bustling with life and energy.

There was a little pond where ducks would glide across its surface diving from time to time, scavenging for the weeds at the bottom, maybe even getting sustenance from people who were ignorant of the ‘Do not feed the ducks’ sign.

It also had an open field where locals and families would enjoy the hot summer days by setting up little camps with blankets and food or even play small games of football or soccer.

While children played in the vast expanse of green, parents would sit back and converse with strangers forming new friendships. It was a place of change and growth and you loved it.

“So,” Yoongi continued as you both walked down the dirt path, “other than your name, and why you were crying in my café, is there anything about you I have yet to know?” Your cheeks flushed red as you shifted your sight to the ground.

“There’s nothing much really,” you replied with a shrug before backtracking his sentence, “Wait, your café?”

“Don’t change the subject. There’s got to be one thing about you… how about your favorite color?”

You purse your lips at the dodging of the question, albeit a basic one, but it was a start. “I guess Rainbow,”

He nodded with a hum, “Wise choice,”

You let out a huff of amusement, “Alright wise guy, what’s yours?”

He pondered for a moment before affirmatively replying, “Black,”

You hummed. “Kind of... dark, isn’t it?”

He turned around and shrugged, “I’d say the rainbow but you took it already,”

You scoffed, resuming your place beside him.

He continued asking basic questions to which you replied and vice versa.

You liked dogs, but him on the other hand didn’t have a favorite animal, at least until he adopted a poodle which made him keen on the creatures, more specifically one named Holly.

You were allergic to bees and he was allergic to cats.

You both enjoyed a variation of music from rap to classical piano music, but the question also led to a debate on what artist is the most superior to all.

Neither of you won, and concluded neither lost with valid points made during said argument.

It only felt like minutes had gone by but wasn’t until you looked at the time that you realized how late it was.

The crowd at the park had begun to thin out while shops surrounding the area were beginning to close for the day.

The once bright sunlight began to fade behind clouds as it began its descent to the horizon.

“I should probably be heading home,” you cut in politely before he could delve into the topic of what they would do in a post-apocalyptic world.

“Oh,” he replied, obviously disappointed.

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Well could I ask you one more thing?”

You nodded expecting it to be another ‘get to know you’ question or something along the lines of ‘if you had to would cut your arm or leg off?’ but it was something much more complicated.

“Can I get your number?”

You stiffened, unsure how to respond.

You weren’t sure if he was asking as a friend or a man with an ulterior motive.

Could you really do it?

Especially after you had just-

“I’m sorry that came out wrong,” He quickly mended, fumbling his words, realizing your distress.

“I think you’re really great, and I’d like us to continue talking. Just two people who enjoy each other’s company, you know?”

You looked up at him and saw he was offering to be friends that would be nothing more.

You couldn’t deny: you had fun.

For the first time in a long time.

Maybe it wasn’t a relationship you needed, but a friendship.

You smiled, “I’d like that,”

You reached into your pocket pulling out your phone, “Here.”

You both swapped devices, putting in the respective numbers. Once the contact was added, you returned each device to the rightful owner.

He grinned, holding up his phone, “How about a contact photo?” 

You smiled, nodding as you  stood beside him while  he took a selfie of you side-by-side. Once the picture was taken he slid his phone into his pocket. “Thanks,” he glanced down at the phone, that darn smile growing on his face, “Y/N. I’ll talk to you soon?” 

You nodded and finally split ways.

As you began the trek toward your apartment a dopey smile remained plastered on your face.

Maybe everything would be alright.

[just-some-random-blogger]

The Soup

Super Junior Super Junior x SuJuMaknae!Reader Characters: Super Junior (ot13 [+ SJ-M]) Summary:  Just like the way you need to give someone soup when they're sick, this is how SuJu reacts when you need them. Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: CRACK, fluff, humor, gnarlyness, etc.

A/N: i need a pick me up so i made this. It’s low key a part 2 to Secrets Of A Maknae, but not really because, well, it’s not HAHAHHAHA, but hello @farewellkorosensei, i’m tagging you cos u said u wanted a part two and i had a part two in mind but then i lost it so now you have this HAHHAHHAHA im sorry im like this

ALSO A DISCLAIMER

THIS IS FICTION IF YALL somehow THOUGHT IT WASNT

none of this is real bro that’s why its an au ?????? ok like ok

Being the only girl in a coed group that’s basically a boy group is not as bad as one may think

Especially since you're the youngest out of everyone, some people just cannot imagine how you do it

Sure like... being the only female means the testosterone thrown your way can be a lot

And there are just some things the guys can't and will never understand

Like how a woman's mind works

But through it all however

You loved being the baby princess

Because you have 13 knights at your side

anD IF EVEN ONE PERSON TRIED TO HURT YOU WELL 

AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAH 

good luck to them

And in case you were wondering, SuJu is not as sweet as you think

LIKE YES THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY THERE FOR EACH OTHER BUT

here's how each member would react to you needing them

ps yall

dis shiz is HELLLAAAA LONG SO it’s under the cut

Being the eldest meant Leeteuk found everyone as his responsibility

BOY ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE NOT EVEN IN SUPER JUNIOR LAJSIQBSUHWBSLAIDYLAWUDLKHKK;

and to you, who is in his group, their youngest AND only female member, he would drop everything for

Like

Everyone who's watched korean TV knows this

cos yall do tv show hostings togther

and everybody knows how soft he is around you

like i mean he’s naturally caring towards everyone

and he’s normally high-spirited with others

BUT YOU TAKE THE CAKE

like you + him equals shenanigans like firecrackers

he does 8999+ dad jokes when you’re his co-host

someone save s.korea

but let us not forget is is the EPITOME of gentleman

he always offers his arm to you

he takes of his jacket or gets a blanket for you to cover your legs when you sit

errbody is like “stfu, we get it stop flexing”

you two are just like “??????????????????? bro fLeXiNg whUAT?”

“i get yall are married n in love but like. pls keep it under wraps.”

“BROOOO HAHAHHAHAH WE’RE JUST FRIENDS”

and then ????????????

mmmmhmmmm

we believe you

cos its all we can do tho

and i mean you two aren’t married but are so too tbh

ELF’s call you two the parents of SuJu

and think you two are sO ADORABLE IT HURTS

anyway

He is definitely the most understanding with you through the age gap you have

And even if he finds some of your actions odd due to that age gap, he always works through it and tries to think proactively

"What are you doing????????"

"IM DOING A CHALLENGE OPPA YOU WANNA JOIN?!" you say as you attempt to put on makeup with your non-dominant hand

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES HE'S WALKED INTO YOU DOING SOMETHING WEIRD IS BEYOND FATHOM

But if you need him

He.

Will.

Be.

There.

Doesn't matter if he's hosting 287378 tv shows at the moment

If you call because some loser broke your heart

He's taking the day off

If you call just to check in and he hears even a hint of sickness in your voice

biTCH MOVE OVER. HE GOT SOME PORRIDGE

He would take care of you even if he was also sick

He would find a way to go to you even if you were halfway across the world

You cant even get mad @ him cos you will and have done the same woops

IF SOMEONE EVEN TEST U YOU WILL BREAK THEM 4 LEETEUK

and obvi we have to add

his dog Shimkung prolly loves you more than him, just sayin

She runs to you and ignores Leeteuk when youre around

Because she loves playing with you

And she loves your energy

And the attention you give her

And the treats you bring

And because everyone loves you

And Leeteuk cant even because he loves you too

Woooooops

Yall listen up

If you think heechul is scary by himself

Try bringing up SuJu's maknae up

I dare you

Just mention your name

and he WILLLLLL EXPLODE

Doesnt matter if it's praise

He Will BE TRIGGGGGEERREEDD

there’s literally an entire 20 (and going) part video comp. of his ears steaming when you’re brought up

like the mere thought of you is already to set him off

It doesn't even phase him if the person who spoke of you is younger or older

The death threats he will sputter is limitless

his tongue is sharper than silver

And the deadliest death glare that's thrown may cause a heart attack.

strangely enough though

but knowing heechul, not strange enough

he is ALWAYS THE FIRST to throw you under the bus

during interviews

ESPECIALLY IF THEY’RE LIVE I CANT

and yall always bicker about the dumbest shit

everyone is like, “wait, they’re not the ones that are married?”

the answer is no

but honestly,

He's broken up with someone because of you

Because they were mean to you, i mean

And because he was tired of them too hekhek

and lyk Heechul may be short

But nothing is stopping him from getting into a fist fight with someone 1000+ ft taller than him.

Ok.

That may be a slight lie cos he'd prolly call the rest of the guys and 5672 security guards to be on his side.

would honestly fite anyone for you

any AND everyone to be honest

He's also very picky with your boyfriends

"Ya, he looks like a womanizer."

"Ya, he looks like an idiot."

"Ya, he smells like woman's perfume."

"Ya, he smells like cigarettes."

"Ya, I don't understand what you see in him."

"Ya, I can't believe you're wasting your time with him."

"Ya, why are your standards so low when you know a guy like me?"

"Ya,"

"Ya."

"YA!"

"You can do better."

and you’re kinda just like, “y dont u just look for a guy for me? or better yet, if you think you’re so great, why don’t you just date me?”

“pshhhh, as if, i’m too pretty for you, child”

is what heechul always says

to you and to everyone who asks why you aren’t dating

he also does’t ever answer your calls

cos he’s always too busy with his video games or selfies

so you get really frustrated when you call him to come over and he doesn’t call

but like 

he’s somehow already at your house

????

cos you needed him and he knew that

????

idek either bro

he has a sixth sense with ya gurl

HE IS SUCH A DAD TOO

***NOT DADDY 

DAD BECAUse

he will baby the heck out of you every moment he gets

but not in public cos his image

also he’s never one to flaunt even with his personality

he CUDDDLESSSS THE HECK out of you

and kinda makes himself clingy for the sake of endorphins

cos he is your happy pill

and your go to man when the world just sucks hard

he gives pretty solid advice

like the ones where you really need some

because he’s never one to sugar coat and will tell you youre a bitch if you are being one

and because of how he is, when he gets soft with you, you know he means it because he’s a broken brick most of the time

he’s also who you normally vent out your problems and burning frustrations to

not that he listens

you mostly just assault him and he takes it

JOKE HE ASSAULTS YOU RIGHT BACK

but somehow that’s therapeutic for both of you ???

smdh

i’d add heechul’s pets

BUT THAT BOY HAS A ZOO

and maybe i’m just shimkung biased lolol

ANYWAY the gist of you and his pets is that you love them and they love you

the end

bro

don’t even get me started on yesung

you know how he likes to think he’s all that

how he’s like really good at singin

wHICH HE IS UHM HAVE YOU NO EARS

but he’s like actin all airy sometimes

whICH IS Y u and eunhyuk havE A BALL MESSIN WITH HIM

EUNHYUK + U = YESUNG CANNOT LIVE

someone save Yesung from his retarded dongsaengs

lol but eunhyuk comes later

anyway, he’s airy

that side of him comes in handy 4 u

because he makes for a gr8 hypeman

letz be real

SUPER JUNIOR together is the loudest bunch of morons that will hYPE YOU DO YOUR DEATH

but you cant keep havin that when you go to award shows

YOU TRIED IT ONCE AND EVERYONE WAS LIKE AWW DATS CUTE

IT’S FKIN NOT BITSH

try havin your ears pierced with screaming every time you’re even remotely related to what the host is talking about

anyway back to yesung

he be your date to eveything

cos he ALWAYS has time to be all that

i mean you bring specific members to the specific events they fit into

u’ll understand laterz

but mostly yesung is your man for the job

cause he’s always available

you know when he’s not touring or holding concerts

whenever you need a date

he puts on all his extra accessories and offers you his arm on the red carpet

or just holds your hand cause it’s easier on his part

AND BOY HE’S ANNOYINGLY LOUD FOR YOU THE ENTIRE TIME

IT DOESN’T EVEN MATTer if it’s for some black suit event

he’s prOLLY GON BUST A MOVE and promote SJ’s black suit while he’s at it what a turd

he’s so loud in fact that you’ve reached a point past embarrassment

ur like, “Yeah, he’s my loud date. problem?”

honestly, yall have to be dumb not to see how in love you two are

there are theories on how you two ARE the one true pair

like the way yesung looks at you when you’re striking a pose

answering a question

thanking someone

receiving an award

laughing at a joke

existing in general

and you RIGHT BACK @ him

only an idiot would

but haha

nope.

just friends too

Y U ALWAYZ LYIN

ye but itz trueeeeee

no matter how fancy you get

or domestic

cos did i mention you two do the lamest things too

like there is no in between

you go buy groceries

tour Gangnam

hand in hand obviously, duh, you do it every time you’re together

as with every member of super junior but yall already knew

i think i strayed too far from my point

point is he’s there to hang out and do nothing

cos thats what both of you are good for anyway

nothing

ha

btw he’s who you bring shopping for clothes

but only like the nice kind you feel me

you’ll get that in a little while too

but like you always go to high-end stores together

never couture tho cos why ??

and YOU GUYS DO MAKEUP TUTORIALS BECAUSE OMG HE’S SUCH A VAIN AND LIKES TO PRETEND HE CAN ACTUALLY DO MAKEUP UGH I HATE HIM

he’s the one you treat like your diary mostly

the everyday stress you have piled up he’s the one you sift through with

like you tell him all the mundane things

and he’d nod uninterested

and then you’d stop cuz you realiized he doens’t care

and then he’d get mad and be all like “Ya, why’d you stop, what happened to the leaf you kicked?”

i think imma stop here cos you get it

yall good for nothing HAHAHH

you and kangin get into the stickiest shit every time your crackheads team up

and being the loyal one you are

you always point and blame him when things hit the fan

and he’s always like “Me?”

and then points right back at you

you’re reactions to each other are fandom memes fml

and you’d think with all the treachery you pull on each other you would never be able to count on Kangin

but that is so DAMN FAR from the truth

cos this boy is insufferably thoughtful when it comes to you

his favoritism shows

like he’ll sell super junior for a 1 cent

BUT YOU ARE NOT PART OF THAT DEAL

he’s usually the one that shoos the guys off when they’ll all up on your ass

he’s also the one to kick heechul when he gets too annoying

or anyone in general

He’s usually your partner in crime when it comes to screwing up SJ’s image

and you havE THIS SIGNATURE ESCAPE ROUTINE WHEN THINGS GO SIDEWAYS

“it wasn’T ME!” you both shout, and then you jump on Kangin’s back and he runs away.

and yes there is also a compilation of you morons doing that for 15 minutes straight in multiple languages

dumb shit

he’s not as big as teasing you as Heechul

but he usually calls you ugly, that’s who you are to him

if you’re texting someone, it’s usually him

you send him ideas for a prank or sm shit

and he’s like imma do you one better

and then you just burn SM to the group bwahahaHAHAHAHAHAHHA

kidding

not kidding

you guys dont actually get to hang out often

but wHen you do there is a warning signal

and idek y yall pretend to be pranking someone else

but yall end up stabbin each other anyway

But there is also those times when you just cry

and he’s there to listen

he’s not as understanding as his hyungs, cos Leeteuk knows what to do, Heechul knows what to say, and Yesung knows how to remember the important things

but he is always there

he tells you as much as he can

and he aint dumb he can say a lot

but he’ll mostly just try to brighten up your day

by telling you a plan to attack one of the members

ANDDDDDDD

PIGGY BACK RIDES

as ive mentioned before, you jump on his back when you skedaddle out of the scene you just caused

which have caused an uproar from many

your company mostly has to fend off rumors of you and him being together the second most

youll find out who soon enough

but back to you an Kangin

he usually offers to give you a piggy back ride

even tho he doesn’t really want to

when you’re down

cos u smol child like to be carried

ew grow up sis

BTW HE WILL FITE ANYONE WHO TELLS YOU THAT

dats all i got fam

you and Shindong work the third most together outside super junior

dats obviously behind Leeteuk

and #2 who will be revealed later

and actually, you two have a very serious and business-like mindset when you’re together

which is why his skillz fly when you collab

you have youtube channel together that’s just u two posting vids you guys want to do

yall fund it urselvs and get some of ur friends to join in

WHICH FANS, ELF AND OTHERWISE LOVE

that’s why you normally go to him when you need help with work

meaning if you’re unsure if you should do a drama he’s going to lay down the points 4 u

he usually acts like your manager

and visits you the most when you’re on set

he’s who de-stresses you when you’re working

and the one who you can count on to back you up when someone at work needs to have a little piece of your mind

he’s who you call up when you want to share an idea or a vision

and is the one to more than others root for you and help you all throughout

whenever works stresses you out,

you two do something fun together

watch a film

annoy one of the other members

etc

you call him up when you have a crazy idea

you call him up when you have a song or plot in mind

you call him up when you are in need of advice

though sometimes his advice is to go to leeteuk or heechul

cos he knows he has limits

which is why you love him

because he’s real and never pretends to  know more than he does

with that said though, he does know a lot

and will tell you all he knows about whatever it is you are asking about

you guys do a lot of live streams as well

sometimes its pointless

sometimes its intorspective

but most times its pointless af

and most times yesung is crying in the distant not-so-distant background

cos like i said yall hangout the most

so sometimes shindong gets into the mix

and you do the weirdest shiz in front of camera

the amount of role plays you’ve done that made viewers go ???? is uncountable smh

like like

where you’re an astronaut

and you need to tell the emperor of goryeo he’s going to be assassinated

and then yesung is the emperor’s horse

and yall die of laughter

or that time yall kissed “by accident”

and none of yall were surprised

and everyoNE WAS LIKE I KNEW IT

and you both ended up laughing

and then everyone was like? >?????

?????

idek either tbh

or that one time you were a cake

as in a chocolate cake

running away from an orge

which was yesung

and shindong was the exterminator that kept hitting him with a pillow whenever he’d talk

i cant believe

you think yesung’s had enough with you and eunhyuk

speaking of...

eunhyuk + u is quite like u + kangin

ppl pray for you to get separated

like pls

l

o

r

d

 a

l

m

i

g

h

t

y

and then when you add DONGHAE

=

the world wants to implode and delete itself

eunhyuk is your usually your fake boyfriend

joke, he’s the fake love triangle interest

you’ll get that later

anyWAY

you say all the time every time you get the chance to that the reason why you dance half as good as you do now is because of eunhyuk

you make his ego fly through the roof

and he’s always like 

dawwwww stop 

no keep going

which is why if for whatever reason you need a dancer or a choreographer or anything between those lines

you call eunhyuk

or jung yunho but that’s not the point

point is the world explodes when there is a sexy suju concept

because you and eunhyuk are always paried up

the flexibility and coordination of your bodies

leaves the world thirsty

like

eunhyuk is pregnant because of you

Dem body rolls

Shimi-shimi

The dehydration is real

you two just do something in sync

AND THE WorLD canNOT

EVEN IF YOU DID IT BY ACCIDENT

and surprise even both of you

the world cannot

whenever you do a show together they make you do so many dances

cant blame them  tho, u two be bomb

point is he’s normally your dance partner in almost everything super junior

and 73% not super junior

but beyond that he is also your bestest buddy

and since it’s a package deal, most of the time donghae is there

yall do everything from wacky antics

to window shopping

to roller coaster riding

to just lying around talking about life

actually, yall pranked the world by saying your were going out once

and thE WORLD BLEW UP

HOW FKING DARE

WE KNEW IT ASHKSDHASDHA

but then yall were like “oh we be playin yall”

EVERYONE WAS SO MAD

LIKE YALL EVEN HAD THE MEMBERS BELIEVING

DONGHAE CRIED BECAUSE HE FELT SO BETRAYED THAT HE DIDNT KNOW

HEECHUL CALLED BULL THO

BUT EVERYONE WAS HELLLLLLA MAD BOUT THIS

When you went sikE Leeteuk wasnt surprised

and everyone gave you shit for so long

Ryeowook vowed to kill both of you

kangin thought it was pretty good though

Eunhyuk and you normally go to parties together

and because you are a d U M b fking drunk

he’s always the one who cleans up after you

because you vomit

and cry

and try to kiss everyone

which is why you have safely kissed everyone in super junior when you're wasted

eunhyuk especially

there are pics to prove it

like

but eunhyuk doesn;t mind

he’d rather be kissed by your vomit flavored mouth than have some ho try to do something to you

he gets really unsettled when other guys come into the picture

he’ll karate chop A morOn

DARE HIM I SWEAR

ya think he be small

but he be strong

those dance moves are his weapon

KA PAW BISH

and we def cant end this without saying

he makes you hangover soup

and all that jazz

when you wanna work out or feel sick

you call eunhyuk

i mean leeteuk loves you but you cant move an inch with that boy

so its eunhyuk

unless you wanna be lazy and need a mom (so leeteuk)

<3

honestly i cheated with that lord almighty part

ARG IM SO SORYY IDEK WHY I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY WHEN I LOVE EUNHYUK SO MUCH

ZHOUMI IS THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

OR AT LEAST YOU SAY EVERYTIME YOU GET WHEN YOU SEE HIM

which you wish would be a lot more than not

IF you have anything to do in China

it’s zhoumi everyday

he’s who taught you how to speak the language and the one who makes fun of you the most because of your prononciation

but you know obviously its all in good fun

you host some shows together

youve stared in a bunch of chinese mini dramas together

but most of all, you two do a bunch of variety

which people LOVE SO MUCH

liiiiiiiiiike

if you werent so busy with the rest of the world

china would love to keep you for themselves

but anyway back to zhoumi

as i said he be the love of your life

because he’s literally everything you look for in a guy

tall, handsome, smart even though he does DUMB THINGS I CANT BE--

but the only reason why you’re not dating him is

is

is

IS BECAUSE YOU ARENT

I have no explaination

you are dating though

like outwardly

it’s like an unspoken thing

where you are dating but youre not and everyone around you agrees

???

kinda

yeh

with all the chinese variety you’ve done

yall have pretty questionable photos and footage together

like

why is you hand in his mouth

why are you two in one pair of trousers

why are you crying over literal eggshells

why are you laughing at him dressed up in a suit

why is he making heart eyes at you when you;re wearing clown makeup

why is he making heart eyes in general

why are you making heart eyes in general

idk man

what

waht

idek

but what you do know is this

there’s this entire ten page article about how he punch some rich guy in shanghai that tried to get too close and zhoumi threw a punch

yes

out of all the boys in the band who’s said they’d punch a moron on the nose

zhoumi as actually the only one who has had the displeasure of doing just that

It was quite the talk of the town

Honestly many were scared for zhoumi

U and him counted

and the rich moron even threatened to sue

but you pointed out that there was footage in the place and that he’d lose so he should just walk away

of course he walked away

and so yeah

but obviously the sonavbish tried to get rid of any footage

And make it look like an assault

It was to be like an even bigger scandal

but you being a smart bitch that has starred in many dramas with the exact same plot already had a copy and so you won that battle

and zhoumi ‘s career was not ruined

he was even hailed a hero for all the no duh reasons

Yeah he can throw a punch 

zhoumi is so soft for you though

and you for him

he’s usually the one who takes your mind off of things

but you hang out the least out of everyone due to sched differences

that doesn’t mean you dont make time for each other though

OKAY NOW FOR EVERYONE’S FAVORITE BB DONGHAE

donghae that knows all your secrets

knows all your dog stories

all your accidental injuries

all your fails

all your successes

it may take a few moments to jump start and access his mental archive

but its there

and Donghae has been your boyfriend on many many occasions

whether or not it be fake or real the world will never know

you guys are the most intimate with each other

like you guys are so casual

and comfortable

that Leeteuk tells you guys off

HeechUL GETS UNCOMFOTABLE

h e e c h u l

even suju separates you on their own will sometimes

and both of you are like

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

donghae is a certified soft boi

and his softness is amplified when you’re together

PDA is second nature to you two

many hand holds

many cuddles

many suggles

platonic?

... sure

and it doesn’t matter where you two are

public

private

interview

korea

japan

america

narnia

nothing stops you from being touchy

people ask you about it all the time

but once again

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway donghae is the go to guy for heart to heart conversations

because he has a heart of gold

the softest purest gold

and he really understands and empathizes

he cries with you over dog movies

and listens to your frustrations

and you listen to him cry

and talk about his feelings

FEELINGS

and you tie it all up by making each other smile

he actually gives really good advice

i mean they all do give good advice at a point

but donghae’s are actually quite on point

even though people think he’s slow

it’s probably because he’s once connected at the hip to you

he’s the one you talk to about boy problems and relationship problems

because he’s the only one that isn’t weirded out about the topic

i mean he’s got a soft spot of you

plus hes really caring

so he’ll listen to whatever topic you want to talk about anyway

he’s really the only who, like, pays attention to all your babbling

most of them tend to overlook that

but never donghae

he’s the guy you call in the middle of the night when you cant sleep

it’s not guaranteed he’ll pick up because i mean duh he has a life

but when he does he really listens

except for when he doesnt

cos he’s tired

(:

and on top of being a cuddly living diary

he’s also your personal massager

like you know those knots on your shoulder

what knots on your shoulders

he massages them away because

youre his ultimate weakness

when you need him he’ll be there in a heartbeat, racing leeteuk to get to you

although he’s not as motherly as leeteuk

he’s more of a brother really

like he is motherly

he does baby you

I MEAN THEY ALL BABY YOU YOU’re THE MAKNAE DUH

but

i can

no actually

i cant explain

because i got nothing

AGAIN WHICH IS FRUSTRATING BECAUSE I LOVE DONGHAE

DHADJ:ASD

YOU AND SIWON ARE THE POWER COUPLE EVERYONE WISHES THEY COULD BE

yall do the most goals things ever

and end up posting it on insta like the aesthetic things you are

he’s the guy you call when you wanna go out and tour

and you guessed it

he’s the second person in super junior you work most with out of the group

can you imagine the power you two hold in dramas

sometimes you do cameos in his shows

sometimes its the other way around

YOU TWO ARE ACTUALLY THE ONLY ONES WITH FOOTAGE OF KISSING

honestly it was a make out but you know

donghae’s fine

Siwon and you travel a lot

in a small scale sense where you just go around on a food trip

or going on a short vacation to another country

dont tell the others tho

YOU DO CHARITIES TOGETHER

and its honestly the cutest thing ever like siwon and his charities ad;hkasd

you two have this meme where its just a compilation of you two lauging

cos yall get WEIRD when you laugh together

your laugh is weird in general

and super junior is weird in general

but you and siwon laughing is just weirder

Whenever you have to go somewhere where you think youre going to die because of the formality

you bring siwon along because he’s the most businessman looking out of everyone

plus he holds a rich man aura

because he is

so

haha

honestly he should just buy SM wtf

He is also the one you go to for advice

because sometimes crying with donghae isn’t really the way you want to go

he’s normally your outside opinion guy

when you normally have a course of action already in your head

but youre just not sure how to go

he gives solid points

and he’s quite firm with his answers

when you need him he doesn’t come as quick as leeteuk or donghae

but he’s the one who leaves last

because he’s just thorough like that

like if you have a mental break down

he’ll come when he can and make sure to make extra time for you

because he wants to both make it up to you and make sure you’re alright

also

i should add

that on top of being very aesthetic together with your black tie events and whatnot

yall make post memes of each other often on your own accounts SO MUCH

ELFs dig it

iconic really

ryeowook actually hates you

like

he hates you because you have such a beautiful voic

he hates that youre pretty

he hates that youre talented

HE HATES THE COMPETITION

but it is also what completes him

It adds to his purpose in life

To cruSh u

N remind u who is butter

yall bicker the most out of everyone

yall raise your voices at each other the most

you always attack each other

AND SOMETIMES KYUHYUN PITS YOU TWO TOGETHER AND

it’s too much to handle

but when you catch on that you’re being played

You and ryeowook teamup

AND KYUHYUN PAYS

EVERYONE THAT CROSSES YOU PAYS

BWHAHAHAHAAHHA

the sass is real when you’re together

THE AMOUNT OF SHADE you throw

makes both of your skin visibly darker to a point

he’s mostly the one to call you out when you and kangin are doing something dumb

or when you and donghae start getting cuddly

or when you just show your face to him

because yes he hates you

BUT

if he hears anyone say anything REMOTELY BAD ABOUT YOU

he wILL attacK

if he thinKS SOMEONE’s BEING TOO sarcASTIC

HE WILL CUT THEM

because only HE can be mean to you

which is why they actually think you’re dating

pipe the HECK down if you have something to say

and the feeling is mutual for you

if anyone says anything bad about ryeowook OR ANY OF YOUR BOYS

they’re dead

cold

but sometimes both of you hate super junior together

and theres a bunch of videos of you questioning why you’re both still here

when he’s not hating you though

he’s violently supporting you

VIOLENTLY

have you heard this man scream

HE SCREAMS HIGHER THAN ANY FEMALE FAN COULD

and LOUDER

if you’re doing something live

heS ONLY THERE TO SCREAM FOR YOU

then he’s out

him and yesung are on a roll when you get an award

and on your live performances

theres normally a cut scene to him in the crowd holding a big ass sign that says something mean

like I HOPE YOU TRIP in bold letters

but in fine print is continues IN SUCCESS AND GOOD HEALTH

cheeeeeeeeeezzzzyyyyyy

but that’s ryeowook for ya

Everyone's confused how you are able to be so violent and mean

But also so cheesily soft

Honestly u just weird

And so is ryeowook

when you need advice he fights you first

"How could you be so dumb to have a problem like that"

then,he'll tell you what to do

OR

If he can, he fights your problem

and then solves it for you that way

Thats how it is, violently soft hek

So serious

ANYWAY KYUHYUN ALSO HATES YOU 

DUH

but unlike ryeowook he sometimes actually make people end up wondering if youre dating

Cause ryeowook and u be mean but not so lovey dovey

But you and kyuhyun are mean and lovey dovey

Like

he makes sure you suffer

suffer in embarrassment in live television

and will do everything in his power to get you and ryeowook to stab each other

but if you squint hard enough

he acts hella whipped for you to be pretty damn honest

anyone with a brain can put together that he’s basically like a child

a child being mean to his crush because he doesn’t know what to do

EW FEELINGS

but yall know what

even though ya both be also killing each other

THE BALLADS YOU GUYS HAVE

I cannnnOt even

is OFF THE CHARTS TEAR JERKING

like

any drama that has been blessed with your vocals

----i meaaaan-----

your song can save any drama

becAUSE

and yall do a lot of live performances together

uhm did I mention you’re basically part of the sub-unit KRY

actuallY JK nvm, it’s you and kyuhyun alone actually

just you and him

hitting those notes like no other

AnD theN theRE was This incident

that you had to perform in on a live awardshow

BUT you Got INTO an aCCIDENT

but like a vocal accident

as in you lost your voice

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED

kyuhyun covered for you duh

because  even if he wants you to suffer in public

he wants it to be by his hand

and not because you ended up getting sick suddenly

I do have to say he’s not very reliable tbh

for the sole reason he wishes to be the true maknae and to desTROY U

yes

that

and EW FEELINGs

“are you sure you hate her though” -literally everyone

“YES!” kyuhyun would answer without missing a beat

“seem like bull by ok”

THE MEMES YOU TWO HAVE AS WELL

THE MEMES

the there can only be one

i would’ve killed you if the lights were closed

excuse you, trash

i sarangHATE U Bitch

boi i cant wtf am i doin

and again

i cannot stress enough that kyuhyun wants your death by his hand

so if someone else comes for you

he’s going to attack that person more than they have you

whenever people ask him about you to, he gets all protective and scary

in summarry, he wants death but not really

yikes

heNRY IS THE WORST

he’s the only one who actually treats you like youre a child

wtf

like you two are the closest in age

the audacity

the nerve

i cant believe

he literally pulls the Oppa card

every

frikin

wHeRE

LISTEN BOI SHE BE GROWN

he literally holds your hand when you cross the street

he asks you if you’ve eaten

he coddles you, especially around others

he brings you juice on set if ever you appear on the same show

LieK

he’s so embarrassing

he be actin as if he’z ya dad

liIKEEE

get a grip

but as embarrassing as he is

he is also your best friend

and he talks fondly about you everywhere

literally never talks shit about you

unless its true tho lololo

and for real is probably literally in love with you

but is like “I’m her older brother tho so”

acts like an older brother 23/6

and the remaining time like a sweet and ExTreMely embarrassing boyfriend

will do anything for you to be honest

YOU TWO GO ABROAD TOGETHER A LOT AND ARE GOALS

if you and kyuhyun do lame things

YOU AND HENRY LIVE IT UP

yall do weird shit online too

and yall have done questionable things on variety

korean

chinese

wherever

which is why you’ve hosted a variety special before

IT WAS ICONIC

if you ever feel down

or sad

or angry

or frustrated

henry is the guy to call to be reminded of the brighter things

like THIS BOY IS ACTUAL SUNSHINE HELP

nothing is impossible or gloomy with henry

and yall thrive in all the crack-ish things you do together

yes

end

[nikvs-blog]

pov rp: i try to wink at u but i close both eyes like jinsoul in this gif <3 SBJDWBDJWBDJ hello im xan im 22 & from the est timezone i use she / her pronouns & ur watching disney channel. is this super late ? yea...but thats super on brand for me its fine its fun its sexy so * jugkook vc* let’s get it !

— jung jinsoul. she/her. cis female. | was that niko seo i just saw in the hideaway lobby ? i hear the twenty-two year old spends most of their time working as a waitress, but i’ve always just seen them scribbling poetry on napkins. they live in 3A and i often see them in the halls. they always give me a vibe of making wishes on falling stars, silk ribbons adorning messy ponytails, and breakfast at midnight.

BACKSTORY

so miss niko was born in a teeny tiny suburban town in north carolina to a pair of  young high school sweethearts ! unfortunately her mom passed away during childbirth so it was a very bittersweet arrival into the world for baby niko

her dad was a mechanic who never made it to college since his girlfriend got pregnant towards the end of their senior year. they got married before niko was born though because they were pretty serious abt raising her right but they never really got the chance to /: but her dad loved his job he loved working with cars & it was something his own dad did before him plus it was a job the town really valued since it was so tiny ( u really only needed one of everything )

when i say tiny i mean everyone knows everyone tiny. growing up the town kinda pitied niko bc of her mom dying so to compensate everyone kinda tried to do their part in raising her ! her neighbors were just as much of a parent to her as her own dad was, and everyone had stories abt her mom so niko kinda appreciated how small the town was.....sometimes

that changed as she got older ! when she started high school her dad kinda entered a rough patch & started drinking more with his buddies, started working less, and niko started getting calls from the sheriff at 2 am like “hey we’re gonna keep ur dad for the night he didnt do anything crazy but he got a little too drunk u can pick him up tomorrow” sort of thing 

she was there for him every time but it got kinda overwhelming knowing everyone was in her family's business & how much kids would gossip at school or adults would give her sad looks

basically she kinda just....became very disillusioned with her reality & began to realize no one around her was really.....happy or had big dreams and their entire lives revolved around this tiny town which scared her

but also ? it had started becoming her life, too. she was voted prom queen senior year, she had a job at a diner where the same people ate everyday, she’d been dating the same boy for four years and everyone talked about how they’d probably get married soon. she’d become exactly like everyone else without even realizing it....she didnt have some big dream.....she didnt even have plans for college she was just so stuck

and then disaster hit the summer after she graduated high school. her dad had crashed right into a tree on a rainy night trying to drive home after a night out drinking & died on impact. the news honestly didnt feel real to her until her grandparents were helping her clear out her house so she could come move in with them 

which is when she finds her mom’s old diary ! and boy was that thing . fat & juicy ... it had all four years worth of her mom’s high school years inside and niko became ...obsessed with it. all she did that summer her dad died was read her mom’s old diary learning more abt the woman from those pages than she ever had from the mouths of everyone in her town

 thats how she found out her mom had always dreamed of moving to some city like seattle and starting this new life once she found out she was pregnant with niko ! so niko was like ok this has to be a sign....told her grandparents she loved them but she couldnt stay in north carolina.....and boop ! she pretty much disappeared from the town, didnt tie up any lose ends ( including her bf of four years who she was kinda engaged to ? JSDBJBDJ ) because she just had to leave that bad. 

cue a scene on bus with niko looking out the window as some dramatic song abt new beginnings plays . JSDBJSBDJW seattle was truly her new start at 18 ... and all she wanted to do was just ... reinvent herself 

so she did ! first thing she did was get a job as a waitress bc uh ur girl was BROKE broke but she knew she was good at serving. the first year was.....pretty rough there’s no sugar coating it niko was struggling bad, probably living in some questionable apartment when she wasnt coach hopping at her coworker’s places. despite all this she was....insanely happy she really believed ( and still does ) seattle is magic !

she was working at a diner ironically, just like she had been back home, but this diner changed her life about a two years ago. one day one of her regulars ( a very well off lawyer who worked downtown ) told her she was way too pretty and charming to be serving at a place like this & that he had a buddy who owned an upscale restaurant near his job downtown & that he could probably get niko a job there if she wanted

so she was like UH hell yes....showed up the next day at this fancy restaurant, charmed the pants off the owner, and the rest ? is history !  she moved into hideaways a bit after getting this new job & has been there ever since <3

PERSONALITY + TIDBITS

personality wise niko is kinda ....hard to figure out. she doesnt do it on purpose, she’s just still learning about who she is and what she really wants. back home in north carolina she was kind of the small town golden girl, loved by everyone type of deal but also very romanticized by those around her ??? ppl thought she was brilliant and knew so much about everything when the truth was she just knew a little about a lot. she would read to escape the suburban boredom of her reality & took a special interest in things like art and poetry and astronomy. shes the type to want to share the stuff she’s learned with those around her

in seattle since no one knew her the way they did back home, niko decided she wanted to keep it that way. because of this and because shes so hesitant to talk about her family sometimes she can come across as mysterious but she’s a surprisingly open person !! she’s naturally super curious and friendly and she’s found it really helps to be the kind of person people want to get to know and trust when working in the service industry. she’s got the type of aura about her that makes you feel as if maybe you’ve known her forever, even if she’s only told you one thing about herself ( which is often the case) . can probably make anyone feel at home within five minutes of talking to her & you won’t even realize how she’s doing it. her boss swears she’s charming enough to sell honey to a bee ! 

she’s also got a flighty side though that comes out when you get too close. niko’s great at relationships when they aren’t deep, but the moment you start and figure her out and see past the smiley walls she’s got up she recoils fast. in a way she’s terrified of anyone knowing too much about her because she’s scared that once they do they’ll pity her, and niko can’t stand being pitied. she’s also super good at dishing out affection but not so good at receiving it. the type to fall in love then right back out of love in one day. kinda a heart breaker bc of this but she doesn't mean to be, she just gets infatuated kinda easily & isn’t very good at keeping things serious ever since literally running away from her long-time ex in north carolina JSBCSJBDJW 

some fun facts: she wants to get a cat and name it cat so bad but she’s not sure she’d be a good pet mom so she just settles for petting stray cats in public. 100% that weirdo crouching in the street making kissy noises because she saw a cat and wants to pet it. she can name just about every constellation & loves to sit outside and look at the stars on clear nights, usually while smoking a joint . she’s a hardcore lightweight .... im talking one tequila shot and she’s floored ... two glasses of wine and she’s taking her top off  then crying kinda deal like she CANNOT handle her liquor so she tries to keep partying to a minimum. she’s got a collection of napkins from work were people have scribbled their phone numbers onto as well as a collection of napkins niko herself has scribbled on. she mostly writes poems and sometimes she even leaves a napkin with a poem on it behind at a table like a little gift for whoever sits there next. she’s probably always writing poems for all her friends or infatuations so if you’re in her life....you’ve gotten one at some point ! 

the only thing she brought with her from north carolina were all her records. she’s got a pretty extensive collection that ranges from donna summer to louis armstrong to led zeppelin & when she finally got a record player of her own in seattle it was probably the best day of her life <3 she really likes to watch scary movies but also they scare her so bad so it’s a cycle of oh yes lets watch this.....fuck why did i do that.....im sleeping with the lights on rinse & repeat. she really likes to cook ! she learned at a pretty early age out of necessity but now she does it for her own pleasure also because of her growing interest / knowledge in the restaurant industry. her wardrobe is 95% thrifted and 5% stolen from miscellaneous people ( her dad, old boyfriends, hookups, friends, etc. ) is a notorious hoodie thief so dont lend her yours......

and this is WAY too long im.....so sorry this literally always happens aha <3 yes i ramble but thats bc . i have a lot to say and i also have a lot of love to give ! spare some plots ? we can im on tumblr but i am 100% easier to reach on discord  @ EL i love u 💖✨🌙#8172 so hit me up there & lets get this show on the road baby ! 

[depression-mealsz]

stir fry (veg)

im absolutely free-associating as i write this recipe so have fun reading all this - i hope you like parenthetical tangents!

*

total time: not gonna lie to you, this takes most of the day. absolute MINIMUM like 45 min. but! you can do it piece-meal so its not all ur time/energy at once

makes: ~4 servings (but really 1 if you’re me)

*

ingredients:

1 block extra firm tofu, pressed (i use old textbooks because i spent too much money on them not to get any use out of them)

3 tbsp corn starch

3 tbsp vegetable oil

1/3 cup white rice

1 egg

1 broccoli crown

1 zucchini

1 yellow squash

1/3 cup shredded carrots (or carrot chips, yum)

1 tbsp soy sauce

salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, liquid smoke, and red chili flakes

sesame seeds for garnish

OPTIONAL (but is it?):

1 tbsp mayo

1/2 tbsp ketchup

1/4 tbsp sugar

same seasonings as above

*

how to:

ok fasten ur seatbelts, this one is gonna be a little complicated to read but i promise its not bad when ur actually doing it. i think of it in sections - tofu, rice, veggies, then combine it. makes it a lot more manageable!

for the tofu, rinse it, wrap it in paper towels (or regular towels? sometimes i do both) and let gravity press it for you while you go for your impressive fourth rewatch of new girl. after you get sick of waiting for your tofu to press, cut it into 1″ cubes (ish. do i know what 1″ cubes look like? almost certainly not. go with your gut). combine corn starch and oil together, along with your spices. be generous with your spices, some of the flavor will get lost in the bake. coat ur tofu pieces in the corn starch-oil-seasoning paste and place on a baking sheet. i like to cook mine at 425F for 25 min. this gets it extra crispy, which im obsessed with. also i coat it in kung pao sauce or whatever i have on hand, but theyre still good plain. i bake the tofu while i cut the veggies and cook the rice. speaking of,

for the rice, just steam it according to the directions on the bag (typically 2:1 water:rice ratio, steam for 15 min). props to you if you have a rice cooker, this broke bitch does not. and if you cant boil rice, they make minute rice u can cook in the microwave or whatever. i think that has the texture and taste of play-doh but if thats ur speed, do you ig. really you should refrigerate it after boiling it for it to be true “stir fry” (apparently) but who has the time for that? as soon as cooked food hits my fridge, you may as well throw it in the garbage bc im never touching that shit again. set the steamed rice aside while you do the veggies

for the veggies, cut em :) pretty much thats it. throw some seasoning on it if ur feeling saucy, which i often am. toss them in a wok pan on medium-high heat with some butter (or your preferred vegan alternative) until theyre cooked down like 85% of the way. theyll still retain some residual heat and cook even after you’ve taken them off the stovetop. set aside while you fry the rice

when frying the rice, you need a LOT of butter. more than you think. probably at least a quarter stick (sucks if ur on the west coast with those weird sized butter sticks). toss that and your rice in the same wok you just used to cook the veggies and add your soy sauce. if youre not vegan, add in your egg and scramble it up. you can be one of those people that adds peas to your rice but really.... why would you do that. cook the rice til its done :) i know i could be more helpful but see i dont think i can here. eating it before its done wont kill you, it just might be a gross sensation in your mouth texture-wise

tofu should be done baking by now, so really you just need to combine ur veggies, tofu, and rice in the wok for a quick stir and then serve it. top with sesame seeds.

OPTIONAL (but seriously, no it’s not):

combine the optional ingredients above to make that quintessential japanese mayo sauce (it feels idiotic to call it yum-yum sauce but alas, i don’t really know what else to call it). i love to dip the tofu in it or mix it in to the rice because im one of those clowns that eats one thing at a time (veggies first, then tofu, then rice).

*

what i love:

ive always loved going out to eat at those hibachi places where they cook the shit right in front of you and do the little tricks with the onion volcano, etc. but a) those are expensive and b) god how strange would it be to go to one of those alone?? so i decided i would make it at home and you know what bitch i did that

this might be the most involved recipe ive posted and it does in fact go against the initial purpose of this blog to post easy and somewhat healthy recipes to stave off depression but i promise, if you can do even half the shit i told you to here, you can basically conquer the world. or at least your subdivision. and youll have all the energy to do that and more bc you hit all your major food groups! what!

you can totally add chicken or ? idk pork or shrimp or whatever your preferred protein is in place of (or in addition to) the tofu. im vegetarian so ive completely lost the knowledge of how to cook meat whoops

what i hate:

one time i made this and went to brush my teeth because it was bed time and there were maggots on my toothbrush and in my bathroom sink ???? ive never seen maggots there before or since, so i dont know if i got some sus vegetables or rice or if i completely hallucinated that but wow that was. an experience for sure. dont let that deter you from making this though! i doubt it had anything to do with my cooking

[49scribes-a]

{--Everybody in this stream was fucking HIGH.--}

He's either also cold or he's going through withdrawals, one of the two.

No he's having a seizure

STOP BOUNCING DEAK

All those burnt corpses look like bacon to me

Crispy dragon-charred bacon

Human jerky

I’d love some jerky rn

Id push you

BACKFLIP BACK FLIP

you're a COWARD. GO TO THE TOP

NO

EMBRACE THE JUMP

EAGLE JUMP

jfc

theres a hay pile at the bottom waiting to catch you. youll be fine

because physics works for you in this game

t his isn't assasin's c r e ed

yes it is. right?

Wrong game

that's what we're watching?

theres is clearly hay

i see parkor

hay and parkour= ass creed

exact

HRDCORE PARKOR

lavi looks like a hobbit ngl. i mean deak

hes gonna steal the ring from gollum

can u see the eye of mordor

hes carrying it

it is

jump. you'll live

Holy shit I survived

TOLD U

the eye of mordor is mobile now

it was great

7/10

TOLD U UR IL CHILD BEARING BONES WOULD CATCH YOU - THEYRE SPRINGY AND RESILIENT

U did it

congrdeurtions

am i having a stroke

Ashdjsjdk

idk - were all varying seconds behind of each other. so mavbe

Who keeps a deer pelt with bread smh

makes sense

That’s why they all sick in Skyrim

the deer pelt is surprisingly sterile

can't have the babes

its the most sterile thing in thie fucking game

you're right

i cant believe deak is aa hobbit

idk if its gonna keep your bread all spongy tho

just wrap it tight. it'll be fine

I mean it was stale so probably not

and your breads gonna tste kinda funny

tHTAT'S PRETTY

SKYRIM IS PRETTY

Noice

AESHTETIC

I CAN TYPE I SWEAR

straight up

r U havin' a stroke?

mE VISION KEEPS BLURRING

I wanna go somepe similar to skyrim, take up residency in n bandoned castle. spruce it up

go to europe

and then pretend im a ghost haunting it when visitor come

they have random "castles"

tHAT SKY THO

SCREEN SHOTS. NICE. GOOD CHOICE

I dont want [castles] I want C A S T L E S

we all have dreams

sweet dreams are made of thiiissss

My dream is to be able to spell astetic

who am i to disagree

you men bees

Asthmatic

mean*

travel the world and the seven seas

Jesus Christ

aesthetic?

Yes that one!

antsthetic

I wanna lick the sugar candy in the sky

Aesthetic !!

antstetic?antstatic?ant static

aunt stacy

A e s t h e t I c

that sounds like something Ant-Man would say

sunnylantern gets it = w=

DUN DUN DUN DUN DUND UN DUN DUN ANT MAAAAANNN H A

Why is that corpse thiccer then I am

duran duran hungry like the wolf

wait, I missed the corpse

we have to go back for the corpse

go back for the corpse, tho

leave NO man behind

you mean jeky

jerky*

no it's jeky

nO

okay, I thought I saw a shadow back there and it looked like a werewolf

we do not waste jerky

Bacon

Mmmmm Bacon....

bc u cannibals wanna eat them

it might have been

don't waste good meat

jfc

Meat is meat

meat is meat. yes

they dead they don't care

exactly

bacon is delicious as hell

MEAT MEAT MEAT

HEATHENS

sos jerky

ALL OF U

U'R A HEATHEN 2 DON'T PLAY COY

scuse you - were pagan

i'm an angel

sounds fake

idk what ur talking about

wOW

it does sound fake

Im pure so I mean

We're all heathens

sounds fake

we're all heathens yes

all my friends are heathens

take it slow

take it slow

(twenty one pilots voice) all my friends are heathens-GDI

TOO SLOW.

TAKE IT SLOW

LMAO

wait for them to ask u who u kno

please don't make

i forgot the damn lyrics

any sudden moves

any sudden moves

AAYY

pfffbbbbt

u don't know the half of the abuse

Y’all remember all that smh

XD

hell yeah man

it catchy

Can’t even remember my middle name

s AM E

same

adopt a child. it's time

tbh - replace remembering our names with more important infrmation, like musical lyrics...people use those alot

my middle name is simple as heck. it's only 3 letters

adopting children usually doesn't go well; just look at doug

dic

Hige. No.

ann

but

No

Mine is four and yet :->

dick:smiley:

mine is 5 letters

NO. Dicks.

mINE IS FOUR

yep, that's my middle name. u caught me

mines four too

Ahsjdjdjd

Maybe we all have the same middle name

i'm Liz Dick now

LMAO

Liz dick taylor

'cause we all have the same middle name

has a nice flow

it does doesn't it?

not me

i'm proud of my name

mine is 3 letters

naw. it's Dick now

its four now

Nope, it three

FINE. Dic

ass

U CAN BE THE HALF SSED DIC

there u go

Hjssjjs

oh yeaaaa

sounds like that's yours, isa

OOOHHH

wow

DANG

: )

SNAP

isa ass

isass

has a ring

ees ass

isa sass

Eat a ss

thees assthesis

isa's ass

prometheous

you're all terrible

w he e z e s

WHERE DO U GET THAT. FROM ISA ASS.

rhymes with thesis

prometheass

that name makes me uncomfortable

I want that as my new name

hahahahahah

Prod the a sa

i blame the movie and all the movies that's connected to that one. I get nightmares

don't worry i'll protect you

really tho, me middle name means darling in french so

aren't u special

i'm an angel

meanie

all of u can fight me

u'r an angle, isa

ur no angel, isa

My middle name is from my great grandmother

I was named aftar a slutty country singer. and a car

PHHHHTTTT

i was named after *no one*

a car and a country singer. fuck me

my middle name is Spanish

lucky

QUESO

i'm hispanic and my middle name ain't hispanic :confused:

UR MIDDLE NAME IS QUESO

THREE LETTERS, HIGE

KSO

3 LETTERS, HIGE

osHIT

I'm hispanic and all my names be hispanic

THAT HAPPENED

the kink cavern

the falling cavern

u and deak gonna kink it up in here

WHy

wait ....still children in this. nvm

because it's expected

Looks like stds grow there ngl

deak is a child. cover his eyes

WH A T. WHERE DID THAT GO TO. WHY IT COLLAPSE JUST NOW

See that’s the stds falling from the roof

you guys are behind me, my gosh. that happened like 10 seconds ago

too much sex in this ramshackle place

No one cleans that place

no one needs to. don't get paid enough for that shit

its the jizz....it gets between the cracks and degrades the foundation

between teh /cracks/

KEK

Can’t people f uck in the bed like normal humans

naw son. too vanilla, they get bored

i

omg

wow

Back in my day we used beds and called it woohoo

this is not SIMS

back in my day, we got in bed and wrestled

i'M CR YGIN

AGSHDJSJ that’s where all my sex ed comes from shdjsjd

Back in my day we fucked on the floor like REAL MEN

WHOA NOW. CALM URSELF

COVER THINE EYES, CHILDREN

Crying my lord

I'M TOO ACE FOR THIS

YOU BETTER BE PRAYIN TO UR LORD AND NOT CRYIN

back in my day, we walked 4 miles with ONE FUCKIN' SHOE

relatable

and we shared between 5 of us

Through the snow

ok but same

bc I ate the other shoe

gdi hige

hige thought it was jerky

I did

it was jerky

Must of burnt it

Anything chewy nd tough is jerky

ye bro. learn from hige

...skin?

def

ye

n o

y e

skin is the jerkiest of all

And I’m the one that needs to pray

and the people are jerky, too 'cause they're jerks sometimes

Take the pot

smoke the pot

^^^^to both

I mean-cogh

dO NOT SMOKE THE POT. JFC HIGE

taste the pot

smell the pot

be the pot

BE the pot, yep

be the pot

It’s pn legal now

why are you HERE

smoke that khajiit drug thing

why did you come back to the kink dungeon

DO IT

we're all pots now

i'm a potu'r a pot

we're all pots

or drink it, i don't remember what it is

moonshine

Does the room smell like pot?

I put a pot on me head and nw im a pot head

. . .

IT'S ALL OGRE NOW

I...

y did u make me read that with my own 2 eyes

wait wrong reference

NO

-leaves-

That’s a bad ref

i h8 isa

whe ez e s

Nasty

i'ms or ry

Talk about HEATHEN

go sit in the corner and think about what u've done

u'r no angel

they cant, the corners are mine. all of them

fuckin' share

u already knew this, liz

i did

I Still remember that video like tbwas uesterdyayb

lucifer was an angel too

Was

yesterday

T'was

luifer is still pretty hot I hear

Gdi

SHUT UP

-eye brow wiggle-

omg

hoNHON

EIFFEL TOWER

ur banned from my next stream, hige

BAGUETTE

NO TEW2 FOR YOU

EIFFEL TOWER

NO. PLS. ILL BE GOOD

BAGUETTE

The Eiffel Tower reminds me of something else but idk why

B A N N E D

ILL CALL YOU MASTER AND WEAR A SHOCK COLLAR AND EVERYTHING

goodbye hige

PLS

doug's got that eiffel tower dick. bye

-pBFT

that pill dick

Hm.

i'll see myself out

more like

Wait was there an anime with an Eiffel Tower :thinking:

there was a show with an eiffel tower. and a lady bug,and a cat, and moths

chaat noir

it was cray

Miraculous Ladybug

Nah thinking of something ten times as traumatizing

wow u guys got it

sCREAMS

y that

o 3 o

sCREAMS TOO

But it might of just been a Tower

I watch it every now and then

are u sacrificing deak to the old gods

and the new

the new season?

gotta go fast. gotta go fast

Are u making jerky

OH new gods

gOTTA GO FASTER FASTER FF -FF-F-F-F-F-FASTER

honey you've got a big storm comin'

SANIC X

I was singing that during one of my streams

u didnt stutter over the Faster part. it doesnt count

I did tho

i have to go make jerky

this music still makes me think of South Park Stick of Truth

pats gently

Sleep is for the weak

And i. Am v weak

whimps. sleep is for the dead

grnted. we are all very dead inside already so....

Guess y’all better get me a coffin then cause imma be sleep in an hour probs. Maybe two. Depends on how much my dog wants to piss me off tonight

SCREAMS THO I FINALLY GOT A FIRE STARTED AND IT CRASHED

LMAO

Rip fire

RIP KIT

no fire

It burned too bright

only suffering

tiger tiger burning bright

Face the dark and cold like a dragon

fuckin capitilism

U can do it kit. Build that fire

How do u skill up in camping ?

Desk looks short.

Deak*

no. hes desk now

he's always been desk

your kindling loks like dog turds

They do I know my dog turds

ive stepped in enough dog shit to know my turds

I’ve picked up enough dog crap to know mine

baaah

Except those look like old ones. All cold and dried out

why do u need the fire anyway

Warmth, light, happiness

DEAK WAS STRANGLING A RAT BEFORE IT CRASHED

Yuh oh

I HEARD ITS LIL ANGRY RAT SOUNDS

The rat crashed the game to live

Rat god

rat ruh raggy

Why kill a werewolf when u can date kne

This little meter shows wet and cold. Gotta keep em down.

thats bswe all know lavis always wet bc hes a horny rabbit

IAHSJSJSJS

I mean u know rabbits...

Wear a coat and u will be warm

gotta hump like theres no tomorrow

Sex keeps u warm..I think

Actually I don’t know:thinking:

id imagine to bodies that sit at 98 degrees F while doing nthing get pretty hot when pressed together and doing activities that raise your blod pressure

thats like a 400 degree sauna right there if my maths right. pretty toasty

....that makes me wanna never do anything cause Thats HOT

goodsex is bad - its how babies are made and we dont want none of that

Condoms are a thing

so are holes and accidents

Ajsjsjsj being gay means no babies

Why do u think Im here

W o w

U

bruh

They’re happy accidents

Tru, Hays where the other half of my sex ed comes in. One half is sims the other is p orn

they are good teachers. pornhub is good to us

Yeah on what not to do I found some kessed up stuff. That’s where I found that shrek video

Spongeknob squarenuts

I can honestly say I have seen worse. Anime p orn is another layer of hell

And then there were three

Wow what a cool dog

THE THREE AMIGOS. THE THREE MUSKETEERS. NOW WITH LESS BLACK SPOTS. or was that treasure island-squints-

That was treasure island

Wood looks so crunchy

I read moby dick, the three musketeers, treasure island, huckleberry fin, tom sawyer and a few others but. fuck me if I remember them in their entirety

I read that as “I read my dick” and I was very concerned

wood - the original forbidden fruit

DEAK GT TURBERCULOSIS

Is that a naked man

prbsi mean this is sex dungeon

My god. Worst kink

why two lil kids re crwling around it giving themselves aids is beyound me

This is the least sexy sex dungeon let’s be real here. No mood lighting, cold. No r and b music. Where’s the pizzazz

maybe they played music on the bones

Yeah cause that’s sexy//

it is if ur a skeleton fucker in the undertale fandom

Do NOT. I have nightmares about that fandom

I can no longer look at a naked anatomical skeleton in all casual and comfort anymore

Wow really just moved the money for that gold

Honestly seeing them with dicks that are blue and glowing is just. V bad. I have seen so many things. and every time I see an actual factual human skeleton now. its all I see

I’m glad are the men here in this dungeon are napping so well

and I am very uncomfortable with naked skeletons

Aren’t all.:.skeletons naked ?

Guess they are wearing skin...

Deaks hair is Cheeto colored which is honest such a look:tm: you rub your hand through deaks hair. your fingers come back stained with neon orange dust

Cheeto dandruff

whose playin the meat sticks again

what

i heard the meaty slaps

i still hear them

alright. go gather your quotes you quote whore

[survivenovascotia]

Episode 5 - they finally swapped us - Austin

I’m taking more of a leadership role on this tribe, trying to make more calls with the challenge. On a smaller tribe it is less risky to do that, and also more risky to go to tribal if people find a reason to target you its easy to get numbers. Dylan especially is a worry for me, in the past he has turned on me for absolutely no reason, so idk how much I can trust him. Dan seems ok, he gave us good intel about the other tribe. Still makes sense to vote him out if we go to tribal though lets not make enemies out of the og tribe just to save one guy.

Tribe swap. Honestly I’m not freakin out abt it bc I’ve got Stephen & Austin who’ve both been pretty good in challenges so. Hopefully I can Michelle my way to the merge Even seems chill he’s just got a russel hantz profile picture which is a lil susp Although I’ll admit I’m a lil sad this is a cooperative challenge bc I really don’t work well cooperatively. Especially when these people are choosing words like CAT and WASHINGTON DC have y’all never played scattergories the object is to get the most random ass answers. We can’t put Unagi that’s way too common, we gotta put UNI, which means sea urchin & is a delicacy. If someone else puts uni I would literally cry I’d be such a clown Xiomara? BITXH have y’all seen Jane the Virgin? Hell no!! We putting Serena spelled with an X. She’s a character in a short story I wrote it’s a real name look it up. Sorry to rant I just can’t believe one of these boys chose Cat. Cat. R u joking

So after 4 straight wins from my tribe they finally swapped us. Dylan, me, eric,and stephen from my og tribe long with dan from the other tribe. I like it and think we are gonna do well together.  Dan told me sunshine said I was trustworthy which I appreciated.  I dont wanna lose any challenges but if we do I feel maybe i should try and save dan? Idk i wanna be a lil more risky then i usually play in other games. Just gotta see what happens but idc to flip for my own game to do better.  

LOCK & MANCALA. LOCK & MANCALA mancala is like the most famous board game WHY did we choose that I said to go with Master Trainer: Pokémon why was that not CHOSEN I hope we lose so I can get voted out & be remembered as this seasons biggest bitch

My tummy is saying Fuck rn. I don't know how this tie breaker is gonna go

So what I am thinking it is going to be like is between Keegan and Coco but like Coco is my number 1 out here rn. Glo says she will protect me and Im trying to see what chips is feeling but I feel even when he says things Im like is this legit? Keegan wants to try working with me. I have to weigh my options but if I vote people from OG Musquodoboit tribe I upset everyone else there, if I vote Keegan, Who knows where on the totem pole I can be with the OG tribe.

It has been brought to my attention that the person I’ve been referring to as ‘even’ is actually dan. ukmmmmmmmmmmm okcay also MICHELLE let’s keep this Queen energy to the merge 😈😈

I think I’m cursed. This will be the fifth tribal council in a row I’m attending. Like how does this even happen? And of course I had to be dumb enough to step up and do the tie breaker which sent us to tribal. At first glance this could very well be the end of my game. Getting swap fucked is becoming a personality trait of mine at this point. However, Heather and I have been messaging and she said she’s going to talk to Chips and see about making a move to keep me in the game. I’m not sure who we’d vote out between Coco and Gloria but honestly I don’t care as long as I stay in the game.

Hosts, Admins and VL. I made a chart that went like 6 layers deep in before it would deadend and I’m like “oh okay it must be at the 6 layer mark”. Nope I got down to 8 layers (T1 was the first) and I feel like it’s either claimed or it’s down that path. In other news, my two biggest obstacles is the OG other tribe -_- me forgetting the other tribe’s name. The second obstacle is Kyle. Kyle thinks he runs the joint and I just play a “Sheeple” game when in reality I’m trying to make small moves to further myself in the game. Kyle and Livingston are close and Kyle, myself and Darcy are tight. Sunshine is the odd one out and a easy boot.

Update since recording, I think Chips is leaning more towards keeping Keegan oof im a swing vote then oof

Maybe I’m just getting massively played right now but I currently have an alliance chat with Heather and Chips and we’re deciding on voting Coco or Glo. And I have Coco asking me if I’d vote for Glo. Maybe I’m being bamboozled but this is actually looking a little bit promising for me staying in the game right now. I don’t want to get my hopes up too much. The last time that did I got annihilated.

Did I just suggest a Chips blindside? I- don't know. I am AHHHH. I am in a bad position next round that's FOR SURE

So unfortunately we are going to tribal. At first I thought Keegan would be an easy vote BUT Chips started playing dirty. He made a chat with Heather&Keegan and tried to form "majority" with them. They were discussing whether to eliminate me or Glo. I'm not having it. Heather and I came up with the plan to blindside Chips because he probably wouldn't see it coming. I kept telling Chips I was SO worried,SO nervous because none is talking to me but it's just all an act. Hopefully we can get rid of either Chips or Keegan tonight and even flush an idol if they use it on Keegan.

So ummm, Operation Chips Gone is under way. I am HELLA nervous! Idk if this is gonna work but I feel HELLA bad.

ok Chips has turned on me saying I am weak link on tribe and wants me voted out with Keegan staying safe, Heather and CoCO are in alliance with me and tipped me off. So our vote is CHIPS. but we all three fear the idol situation. So I may not survive but calling me weak link who beat Chips ass in Scavenger hunt and came from behind to do so lol yeppers Glo beat Chips. Anyways it might be good bye GLO GLO tonight and if so I did my best. That would be end for me I guess. <3 GLO <3

I think if we were on larger tribes and the challenge was different I might have thrown it. Bit as it is tribal only presents three options: a) vote out dan, which is not a big move or anything and is not going to change much. b) save dan, and vote out someone from my og tribe, which would piss off 8 other people I had ground work with, and c) Dan pulls something out of his ass and survives, voting one of us out. So yeah, no good scenarios for my long term game at tribal. However without it I can keep my relationships while also building new bridges with Dan that could help come merge and further.

If Glo is truly the vote tonight, I’m probably going to cry. Not even going to sugar coat it. I’ll be crying. She’s just so pure and so nice and just this incredible person. I’m trying to not let it sway my judgement too much. I’m tearing up just thinking about her leaving. But if Heather and Chips are being honest with me and not conspiring against me they’ve both said they’d vote for Glo. And all I need to do right now is stay in the game. Against all odds, I might just manage to stay in the game in a disasterous 4v1 swap. The biggest downside after this is getting Evan(?) back from Oak Island. I’m praying he’s not close with Heather and Chips or I might not survive another tribal.

So we got swapped onto a tribe of 5... and lost the first immunity challenge on that tribe. Keegan is the obvious vote since he got swapped onto our tribe. I'd rather not. Spent all day lying to Glo telling her I was going to vote him. If for some reason that's not the case and Glo doesn't go, cool. I got gamed. Also, I'm in an alliance chat with Heather and Keegan and lowkey I love it. I want to see this be a final 3 but I'm not going to get ahead of myself.

Conspiracy theory: coco, glo & Keegan voted out chips, heather on the outs. No fucking clue why but it’s the only thing that makes sense. This whole game is so scary I’m like watching blindsides & murdering happening & im just chillin on the sidelines

KEEGAN SURVIVED! I’m so happy for him! That’s all I wanted. Hopefully Keegan and Dan can make merge. I wanna throw the F14 immunity to send home Sunshine but that’s just a thought. I always said my two biggest obstacles were the OG other tribe and Kyle. That’s still true but maybe there’s hope for the first obstacle!

Oh damn, I didn’t see that coming. There are two possible situations here: 1) That Keegan managed to pull two votes in with promises and shit, and 2) That there was a pre-existing alliance against Chips (and others) that I wasn’t aware of. This is worrying, not only did I just lose someone I wanted to work with but it shows I’m not that aware of what’s going on. Not good.

I watched the tribal council. Keegan wasn’t even on the chopping block which is great. Glo seems like a lovely lady and seems easy to bond and manipulate. Great for me 🐍. Our alliance including Dan, with Keegan and his allies can make a strong group and potential majority. I feel like at merge I can play my cards right and secret pull strings.

Chips was voted out which is honestly a big surprise to me but at least I’m still here! Who survived a 4v1 Swap Fucking? This guy!

[girlwithbird-blog]

Okay, I'm looking to get a cockatiel. I've been looking into them for WEEKS now, but I still feel unprepared, and I really want to get some actual first-hand knowledge from a person. I'm really not sure what to ask specifically! ^^; Any tips you'd give me, this being my second bird--after a budgie--and my first cockatiel? (Any knowledge at all would be helpful! from recommended cage size to what might be a good healthy diet!~) Please and thank you~~

hey darling!!! god sorry its taken me forty years to get to my ask, i’ve been so swamped at work IT SUCKS

THIS IS GONNA BE LONG

OKAY, HERE IS THE INFO I CAN GIVE YA FOR A COCKATIEL:

1) ALWAYS ADOPT. i know you see that cute birbo in the pet store window, but please, PLEASE, refrain from purchasing him.  there are currently THOUSANDS of homeless birds in north america alone that need you to be their guardian. i know you want to save that baby from the pet store, but doing so continues the cycle.  they’ll just replace him and the horror continues.

2) GET THE BIGGEST CAGE YOU CAN AFFORD! do not listen to what the pet store clerk says (lol i worked in a pet store and straight up i would discourage people from birds EVERYDAY and tell them to rescue and that none of our cages are big enough, and they listened and adopted and im surprised the boss didn’t find out and fire me HAHAHHA) i would go to a bird specialty store to find your cage - you want to make sure it is durable enough, the bar spacing is correct (for a cockatiel you want them no more than half an inch space, theyre little and you dont want them to get stuck!!) i suggest powder coated cages, they’re easiest to clean the poop out of!!!!

3) GOOD DIET IS SO IMPORTANT. STAY AWAY FROM SEED!!!! seed despite popular belief is not very good for them.  it causes fatty liver disease and can make them ill and shorten their lifespan. (rose is now put on milk thistle-it buffersthe liver, as from the shit sanctuary she was from… god knows what she ate so now im in the process of getting her liver spiffy clean!) a good PELLET DIET is SO, SO SO SO IMPORTANT. and dont be discouraged, it is very hard to change a birb from seed diet to pellet.  so you have to change it over gradually and honestly, it can take a year to get that done.  rose is picky as hell, but i found a pellet she likes which are the Zupreem fruit pellets.  they’re not the healthiest, but they’ll do as now she is eating by herself.  i used to have to hand feed her ALL THE TIME like the diva she is.

 Here is a list of good pellets!! (from best to ok)

- Goldenfeast Goldenobles (quinoa based instead of corn, i wanna change rose to this when she’s ready!!)

- Harrisons Fine High Potency (start with high potency and then go to adult formula - gives em the nutrients they need for switching. corn based, and not my fav but it is vet reccommended but id say goldenfeast is better as corn aint that great)

- Pretty Bird (fruity and like, kinda okay? its better than zupreem lmfao but its very sweet, and makes their poo colourful)

- Zupreem (available at most pet stores, comes in fruit, veggie, nut, and natural flavours. what Rose eats and its a pretty good food. i believe its corn and soy based, not the best, and there is sugar in it, but its a good starter for your bird as they will most likely eat it because its colourful and sweet!!! from having Rose on a pellet diet - her plumage looks AMAZING)

all those brands come in different size pellets, i would go with the SMALLEST as it is easier for them to eat, and if you mix it with seed it kinda blends in hehe

4) DON’T JUST FEED PELLETS. A birbos diet should be 80% pellets (give or take) and 20% fruits, veggies, grains, and good stuff!!!! making a chop is a good idea, and you can freeze it and take out some everyday for their breakfast/dinner!!! Rose is very picky, and a rescue may be too, but do some research on what good fresh foods are good for birds!!! rose’s fav are zuchinni, peppers, pasta, scrambled egg (shes obsessed with egg) and chinese snow pear!!!

5) LOTS OF TOYS, AND THINGS TO DO!!! PIMP out their cage with dope toys, various perches and material (AVOID SAND ONES, HURTS THEIR TOES. get natural wood, rope (if u know they wont shred and accidentally eat it) and various thicknesses!!!) and im not saying spend a fortune (whcih i have with rose omfg) undyed popsicle sticks are amazing, paper, toilet paper rolls, cardboard etc they LOVE. but also, a good store bought toy is nice too!!! but most you can make from home!! plus i have a store where i have handmade toys, ill be posting more selection too!!

6) BE PATIENT WITH THE BABY! they most likely won’t warm up to you RIGHT AWAY (i mean they might, depends on their personality!) so do not feel discouraged if they dont want to play or cuddle right away. and heck, they may not even like cuddles. they’re as much as individuals as we are as humans. rose is usually attached to my shoulder all day, but some days honestly she just plays by herself and doesn’t want me to play with her HAHAHA. when you bring them home, introduce them to their cage and let them hang inside and get used to it.  sit near them and chat and offer some millet and let them come to you.  its a whole new world for them, so allow them some time!!!

7) and the most controversial topic… TO CLIP OR NOT TO CLIP? okay, my two cents on clipping goes as written.  if it is safer for them in your house, please get their wings properly by an avian vet or an experienced staff memeber at a bird specialty store. clipping them incorrectly can cause balance issues and confidence issues and trust issues. NEVER CLIP THEM YOURSELF AS THEIR OWNER. THEYLL BE PISSED AF. and most likely scared of you. if your house is unsafe -ie people coming in and out, small space, lots of windows, forgetful people that leave windows open, PLEASE CLIP THEM. it will save their life and prevent any deadly accidents.

if you HAVE THE SPACE. and know that they will be safe, and you believe they will be okay, leave them flighted!! it is much easier i must say having smaller birds flighted as they won’t be as cramped in a house as a big bird would be.  Rose is flightless as she chews her flight feathers, but they are growing back.  and even if they all did, my place is way to small to allow her to fly properly so i would keep her clipped for her safety.  also, if there was an emergency - such as a fire - it is much easier to evacuate a flightless bird than a flighted one.  i have really bad ocd when it comes to impulsive thinking and i obsess over how i would get rose out in a fire all the time… so keep a pillow case by the cage, and if god forbid that happened, grab your baby, toss em in the pillow case (protects them from smoke inhalation) AND HIGH TALE THEE FUCK OUT OF THERE. and that would be easier if they are clipped… just food for thought.  

anyway i hope this helped you and others maybe too!! im sorry this took forever to get to, my lifes been insane.  please do TONS OF RESEARCH TOO and look into rescues. if you need any more help let me know my love

[coterminalangle]

THE WINGS TOUR ANAHEIM DAY 2 RECAP

-FIRST, I GOT PLENTY OF PHOTOS AND I FILMED ALMOST EVERY SONG (not the whole song for some of them) SO IF YOU WANT ANY PHOTOS JUST MESSAGE ME!!

-so i was pretty close up: section 225 row E

-pre-concert, they played all their MV’s and no one was really hyped for like 2013-2015 MV’S BUT THE MOMENT YOUNG FOREVER CAME ON EVERYONE WAS SCREAMING OK EVERYONE WAS HYPED LIKE BRUH

-they started with not today and let me tell you, the moment they appeared on stage, they looked unreal. literally. they looked like perfectly sculpted wax figures istg

-i couldn’t believe i was actually there; i still can’t.

-they did silver spoon next and the beat was kinda different but it made it more lit so i wasn’t complaining and boi those hip thrusts i dropped my phone

-everything went downhill after that- not downhill like failure of the show, but failure of my heart and mind to process my emotions

-all the songs im gonna recap are gonna be out of order from this point down

-so they performed dope and of course jimin ended with that cute ass heart thing

-lost hit me like a truck

-they did this mashup of old songs- n.o, danger, boy in luv, no more dream??, there were others but i honestly can’t even remember i was too hype

-ok

-cypher 4

-c y p h e r  4

-i am willing to kill to watch that performed live again

-i don't usually say these things but THEY LITERALLY WORE THOSE RICH ASS SUGAR DADDY COATS OK HOSEOK WORE THOSE FUCKING SUNGLASSES AND NAMJOON IS SO FUCKING TALL AND YOONGI JUST FUCKING SLAYED MY EXISTENCE OK

-speaking of daddy, this bitch sitting near me wouldn’t stop screaming daddy throughout the entire concert and i nearly smacked her 

-but yes, cypher 4 made my existence whole again

-SOLO SONGS

-jeongguk that talented ass fucker who can do anything and do it perfectly i can’t with that boy he performed begin so well thaT DANCE BREAK THOUGHT OMF so much talent i-

-jimin was a whole king. a whole king. when they lifted him up in the last chorus in Lie, i almost chocked and died

-yoongi. yoooooonnggiiiiiiiii. ok so first love. they played this vvv emotional video before he performed and it fucking crushed me and then yoongi comes out and slays the entire human race .here was an orchestra and i was so weak ok

-reflection. ok so you see, kim namjoon is my whole heart and seeing him in person was actually so surreal and absolutely unbelievable. sure, call him my bias but he means a lot more to me than a label. anyways, this boi, so fucking tall. he looks so much taller in person. like i have friends that are 5′11 but kim namjoon i dont know why he looked so damn tall maybe because he’s a glowing bean but still i dont understand why he had to look so damn perfect i screamed i love you kim namjoon at the top of my lungs about 67 times. OK AND BACK TO RELFECTION ok you know the whole “i wish i could love myself” part?? well after we started chanting “we love you” he started changing up his lines and i dont know why but they hit me so damn hard just him singing in english and being able to speak from his heart while he improvd in front of 20,000 people was heart breaking and heart warming at the same time

-stIGMA ok taehyung and namjoon swithced places so basically at the end of reflection, namjoon runs inside the telephone box and then taehyung comes out of it. here’s all i remember from stigma: kim taehyung hit those high notes yes he fucking did

-MAMA MAMA MAMA OHMYFUCKING GOSH ok hoseok is pure gold, he couldn’t stop smiling, ohmygod. everyone was hyping him up and he couldn’t stop smiling he’s so ethreal god bless. basically he sat in this chair with the backup dancers around him and he sings mama and all that. and you know that pause before he goes “hello mama” OK LOOK HE STARTED WALKING BACK TO THE STAGE AND HE PUTS HIS MIC ON A STAND AND STARTED SINGING/RAPPING ACOUSTIC OHMGOD BEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE HIS “HELLO MAMA” FUCKING KILLED ME OK YES IM A 94 LINE ENTHUSIAST COME@ ME also during mama thre were videos of fetus hoseok playing on the screen and i sobbed my little boi i lava him so much

-AWAKE WAS MY SHIT I SWEAR OK JIN HIT ALL THE FUCKING NOTES GOD FUCKING BLESS HE’S A KING AND THEN DURING THE PAUSES IN BETWEEN LYRICS HE WOULD JUST LOOK AT THE CROWD AND HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS GONNA CRY EVERYTIME HE WAS SO SINCERE AND SO THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL I CAN’T THANK THE LORD ENOUGH FOR KIM SEOKJIN

-okok so they performed save me and i shit myself

-they performed run and i was like MY SHIT dude they kept throwing water or whatever that action is called but boy was it a beautiful sight they were so happy i’m so happy

-well fire. um. threw me under a bus and crushed every organ in my body HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN PERFORM THAT SONG SO WELL AFTER PERFORMING LIKE 15 SONGS BEFORE IT BITCH THEY WERE SO IN SYNC I CAN’T BELIEVE

-21st century girl was so cute they were so free and so themselves ive lived

-i need u. wow tears fell from my eyes

-favorite part of every song was when they would just stop singing/rapping and the entire audience just chanted the lyrics tey looked so happy i can’t

-whEN YOONGI AND HOSEOK TOOK OUT THEIR EARPIECES YOU KNOW YOU DID WELL

-OH AM I WRONG WAS SO LIT OK

-they played this really emotional video and it basically was saying how its 7 boys but 1 heart & 7 hearts but 1 boy and i honestly didn’t think it could hit me that hard it was just explainin their journey and how they’ll always walk togther i swear to god i’m whipped sadly i didnt get a video of this video but ohmygod

-everyone served fuckin looks wowow blessed

-seokjin told us that he felt born again and i lost it AND THEN HE GOES “ARMY YOU ARE MY HEART” AND HE HAD A FUCKING PAPER HEART TAPED TO HIS HEART I CANT WITH HIM OHMYFUCKING

-THEN TAEHYUNG TAKES IT AND STARTS MAKING CUTE FACES WITH IT

-ok someone threw some flower plushy i believe on the stage and seokjin picked it up and pretending like he was pikachuing with it god i cant him 

-kim namjoon started thanking his mom for everything hes done and accomplished and ohmyogod i screamed “thats my baby” so many fucking times at all 7 of them im so whipped 

-he started talking about the rainbow and then got all philosophical and i couldnt stop crying hes all “after rain theres always sunshine and thats where rainbows come from” aand im pretty sure he connected us to being his rainbow somehow ohmygod im melting

-did i mention kim namjoon is so fucking tall hes so ethreal i cant even begin to describe how much i love him ok all of them look so fucking good in person they look like gods tbh ohmygod KIM NAMJOON IS SO FUCKING TALL CAN I HAVE HIS HEIGHT IM ONLY 5′6 GODDAMN

-seokjin’s intense waving at the end made my life

-JIMIN FUCKING JUMPED LIKE 6 TIMES OK HE WAS JUMPING FOR JOY AS IF HE WERE JUMPING FOR A JUMPING PHOTO GODDAMN I OVE THAT BOY SO MUCH I CANT CONTROL MY EMOTIONS HES SO PRECIOUS

-HOSEOKS SMILE IS ALL I EVER NEEDED TO LIVE

-also your ears are literally plugged in there from the amount of screaming and hype so all of them sound perfect and have the voice of gods then once your ears are okk you can actually hear reality

-spring day got me so emotional jimin’s dancing man

-2!3! i cant begin to explain

-ok BOY MEETS EVIL HOSEOK IS A MOTHERFUCKING GOD I NEED AIR OK HE SLAYED THAT SO FUCKING HARD OK THANKS

-blood sweat and tears man. blood sweat and fucking tears: a song title that sumed up my entire concert experience. ok but it was so good ok, they were all so into it. DURING YOONGI’S FIRST RAP VERSE HE HELD OUT HIS MIC AN EVERYONE CHANTED HIS ENTIRE RAP OHMYGOD BEST MOMENT HE LOOKED SO SATISFIED I LOVE MIN YOONGI

-oh yes during that really emotional video they played you never walk alone and i lost it

-i probably forgot a shit ton of stuff but i hope this gave you insight on how to die and live at once

-one of the best nights of my life-i cannot begin to thank bangtan for their wonderful performance and ability to hype up 20,000 people and get them all to scream “i love myself” and to get a crowd to scream lyrics in a language they don’t understand or speak

-all 7 of them asked if we will walk with them forever, so here’s my answer amongst the 20,00 people screaming, crying, and hype: bangtan,  i will never fail to support you and i will never fail to stop loving you. thank you for proving that dreams come true, even if those dreams seem like a reality because we’re numb to believing the nearly impossible. thank you for letting me stick by you and thank you for bringing the freshest sense of life and love and reality. so yes, i will walk with you, out of pure love and inspiration.

[nvkolais-blog]

ay up me dudes !!  i’m lo  (  with an L sdfjdf ive had some ppl saying it with an i before and it was like .. pls noooo sdfjds  )   and its so nice to be here ?? im ?? shook ?? by this rp idea honestly its aMAZING im lovin it(tm) 10/10 anyways there aint much to tell abt me dsfjsdjfsd other than im an aries just like nik and a dweeb but anywaysss whatevsss here we go on an intro bc hes more interesting than i am xo 

he actually hates his mark ya no ?? doesnt fully 100% get it, as in .. why hes gotta be the one to get it. never actually wanted to have it either ?? he thinks the further he gets from those kinda stuff the better he’ll stay and sjfsdjf we all know it aint like that .. he also gets so mad .. like ‘ fuck you i’m not gonna be any dipshits soul-whatever ew go away ‘ just .. dont rly talk abt that with him sjfsdf. 

has a :// temper honestly .. will 10/10 punch u i h8 his ass 

although overall hes p .. detached, so to speak ?? doesnt really how can i say it .. get attached to people that easily ? some ppl almost say its as if he has an emotional block or smth but thats just how he is sdjfdsjf he doesnt really stress much about that either, if he ends up liking someone ( and i’m not saying romantic relationships only, but general as in could be anything ) then he just .. will?? but that wont happen v easily tho sdfjds 

also hes a ride or die :// if he rly likes and considers someone to be important in his life ( then again, not necessarily smth romantic. could be anything. ) he’ll stick thru fire and death for this person and be there always for them 

doesnt rly have a way with words .. lmao .. he’ll say it like it is. he doesn’t really mind if the choice of words isn’t the best either. if someone wants the truth, he’ll tell them just like it’s supposed to be, no sugar coating etc etc. 

but even so .. he can be kinda cold at first ?? dsfjsd he’s got a capricorn rising so maybe thats bc of that !! can also be a sneaky sob ): 

he deals drugs obvs .. and uses them too rip sdfjfjds u wnt be surprised to see him high on weed, coked up or just on pills around dsfsdjf esp if hes a bit more approachable lmao he’s been using drugs ever since a teenager, honestly. way before he got to badlands - and it’s even why his mom threw him out of their trailer. :// his dad was serving time in jail at the time, but he knows if he wasn’t he’d do the same. he tried other jobs before, but would always get fired so he just went ? for his last resource. but we all know using the product u sell doesnt rly end up too nice for ya so sIGH dsfjsd 

ironically enough likes aliens aesthetic lmao .. like .. those planet doodles aesthetics .. alien jacket patches .. stars .. space disk aesthetic .. those pics with street alien signs w/ a purple sky on the background .. and whatnot if that makes sense. also he rly loves grimes ok thats like some bonus points w him sdfjds. 

[travelinghermit]

The Jaguars Nectar: Yagé Ceremony

Over the course of my brief travels I can recall a number of cities in particular that have completely stopped me where I stood as I looked in awe at the shere impossibility that a place can exist in this nonfictional world. Mrauk-U isolated deep in the western front of the Myanmar-Bangladesh jungle, Hanoi the capital of Vietnam, Namche Bazaar resting quietly in a dome carved out of a mountain in the high Himalayas, Varanassi the ancient Hindu pilgrimage site of fire and death on the Ganges, and Dharmsala the Tibetan refuge in Northern India in the foothills of the Himalayas which perpetually smells like sandalwood incence.To know these places are out there is a true comfort, like there is some foreign magic really out there in the world ready to be discovered by those who choose to look when its easy to view this world as cold, heartless, and hollow.

Today I am in the Gateway to the Amazon. Mocoa a small capital city in the Putumayo region of Colombia which is the jump off point into the massive 5.5 million kilometer Amazonian Rainforest which stretches far into Brazil. Its only my second day in the city but I believe I may have found a city to add to the list of legends above. The city itself isnt anything great until you look out into the densley forrested hills of the backdrop and then suddenly your eye will catch a huge flock of black birds in the distance circling like a tornado searching for food. What makes for the perfect cherry on top is I got here all by myself and that makes all the difference.

What makes Mocoa truelly special though are the ceremonial rituals kept alive today in this small part that the overwhelming native population here in Mocoa have kept alive for generations, possibly millenia. The consumption of Yagé a bitter, earthy, kinda tastes like puke potion concocted by the selectly chosen Shamans who from birth are brought up as mediators between the spirit and earth realms to connect traditionally men but now stretches to all sexes connect with Pachimama the motherly spirit of the Amazon. Acting as if a light in a dark void to guide the people through inner contemplation. Its not pretty though. Participants are asked to fast for atleast five hours and then once the potion is down the hatch an inner cleansing occurs where the Yagé flushes all the old tar, slime, and negativity, that builds up over time in the body like in an aging machine and then rapidly perges the the inner excrement out of any orifice be that out the mouth orr..

The active ingrediant in the potion is DMT a highly psychoactive compound that is the source of the inner revolations and journies people go on. Im not going to sugar coat it you trip balls on this potion but after partaking in my first ceremony completely randomly and out of the blue yesterday after I rode in which just so happened to be the Spring Equinox and the reason for this special ceremony. Weird things are occuring in this journey just like that coincidence that make me question the reality of destiny.

The ceremony was a truelly amazing personal experience which I was able to take a step back on this journey as a whole and see some of the habitual tendencies I tend to always go back to. It was meditation on steroids.

The ceremony was held in a large circular encampment with open spaces on the sides and a domed roof. A fire pit which burned all through the night lay in the middle. I got to the center where the ceremony took place just outside of Mocoa on my motorbike at 830pm. I was incredibly nervous having heard about yage or ayahuasca for a long time. Its not just a pleasurable trip for a few hours, its real inner engineering and its far from pleasurable at times. The potion forces you to look at yourself honestly at the small things we as flawed humans do to ourselves and other people. The Shaman was an older Indigenous woman who wore the traditional Shaman wardrobe of colourfull necklaces with a feathered headress, and just layer after layer of beautiful garments. I arrived just in time as I was last to arrive, then the lights turned off. There were maybe ten or so other foreigners. One by one we walked up to the Shamans brewing station at the front and consumed the earthy bitter liquid. With the lights off there was not a sound, only the russeling of people trying to get comfortable around the fire. As time went on a faint drum could be heard which slowly built up over time. An hour after consumption the effects of the medicine began to take hold immediatley as if everyone at once or perhaps it just felt like that as we were hypnotized by the drum building faster and faster with the sounds of a shaker of some kind. Nearing climax I begin hearing violent puking around me and the sound of people jumping up to get out to the forrest to relieve themselves. Me. I was feeling ok no puke or any kind but I could feel with my eyes closed as some force perhaps Pachimama herself began to gently encompass herself all around me as if someone putting a razor thin linen over me. Then suddenly it decided to take hold and I said to her right from the start “I give myself to you just please do not harm me”. Where most people chose to lay down on their mats as if obediently sacrificing themselvesI layed a blanket on the cold rock and made a point not to lay down. I thought if this is what the warriors of old generations took I have to sit up and take whatever comes however difficult because that is what the Yage spirit would respect and reward. And I believe my assumption was correct or I dont know I was tripping.

The ceremony lasted all night. When I took my second cup of Yage I retreated into a hammock which was the best decision I could do as it felt like I was floating in dark space. All fear eleviated as the effects were strongly felt with mental images of a phoenix withering to ash and then once again rising up in rebirth realizing you must experience displeasure and pain to experience bliss. What made the ceremony truelly something amazing was the Colombian guitar player and drummer playing all night singing absolutley beautiful, sweet songs. I have no idea what kind of songs he was singing but they sounded like epic melodic bard songs that you would hear hundreds of years ago passing by an old tavern and the musician playing his lute would sing of the mighty hero and his conquests, and of course in my mind I was the hero. I dont know how he just kept going and going all night long. I eventually fell asleep in my hammock as the sun was rising.

So ya this is my attempt of translating a truelly untranslatable experience which really did feel like some ancient ancient magic. I probably just sound like some rose colored glass hippie but after last nights experience I was able to look at this once in a lifetime journey as objectivley as I could and I know how to make it even better. For one I have to keep improving my Spanish. Whenever I feel like im making progress a situation will arise which makes me feel completely lost. Also theres some deep habitual tendencies I need to combat daily. The mantra through the ceremony running in my head was “Excel at the mundane”. Dont be a half concious zonbie going through the daily task of life, do them with charisma and style and put real effort in.

A strange yet oddly suitable experience as I journey farther into the unknown. Not only through a very foreign continent but a journey deep into self understanding and self mastery.

Uploading photos is a impossibility at this time. I still havent finished uploading my Tierradentro tombs photos. I got no photos of the Yagé ceremony.