#its not fine if you take 2-4 weeks to reply to something | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

shinysobi · 3 months ago

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pretty u

summary: when joshua, your best friend gets engaged, you can't help but feel as though you're missing out on something important. jihoon, your other best friend, kindly offers to set you up with one of his many friends. chaos ensues, seungkwan is an observer who knows everything, and unfortunately, mingyu is a hapless victim.

pairing: woozi x fem!reader

genre: crack, fluff, angst

word count: 10k~ish

warnings: alcohol consumption, general warnings apply

a/n: angst central again lmao but there's something good for everyone ig hehe also dedicated to gigi, who's been the first reader of this hehe

a/n 2: reblogs/comments/likes are, as always, much appreciated! tell me if you like it lmao

chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4

Chapter 3

I learnt, at a very young age, that the best thing to do in any situation, is to ultimately do nothing. If you do nothing, then you will never fail. I’ve managed to spend my entire life doing the bare minimum, but right now? Right now, with Jihoon’s face half a feet away from mine, close enough for me to see the dried tears on his cheeks, I begin to wonder if it’s the best thing to do.

“You should say something,” Jihoon says, wiping his face, “I didn’t run half a mile uphill just for you to say nothing.”

What does he actually want me to say? I’ve furiously racked my brain to find the correct words to say to him; in the aftermath of the argument, but I’ve always come up empty. Its odd, and strangely humbling, this experience. Should I even say something? Am I allowed to? Jihoon stares at me, and it’s only then that I realise, he’s still holding my hands.

“I’m sorry.” I say, “I’m sorry for everything I said that night.”

“No, you were right. I shouldn’t have forced all those decisions on you when you were not—are not ready.” Jihoon says, “but I really can’t imagine myself in a world where I am not your friend.”

He leans down, picking up a plant, “for your kitchen garden. Your chive plant died last month.”

I take it from him, the lingering warmth of his hands on my skin, “this is your idea of a housewarming gift?”

“This is all I could get at such short notice,” he replies, “all the other stores were closed, so I got this from a street vendor.”

“That’s—unexpectedly sweet of you, Jihoon,” I say, turning to place the pot on the floor, “do you want to come in?”

Jihoon nods, before slipping off his shoes and his jacket, entering my still-unfurnished house. All of a sudden, I’m self-conscious about the state of the place, even if he has seen worse. What am I doing, getting worked up over Jihoon entering my home?

“Look,” he begins, standing in the middle of the kitchen, “these past few weeks have been a personal kind of hell for me. I know you don’t care, but I’m just putting it out there. Life without you, without seeing you every day, without talking to you, has been hell, and I don’t want to live in it anymore.”

“Jihoon,” I begin, but he holds up a hand, silencing me.

“I’ve felt like shit, knowing that you’re just out of my reach, to the point where even if I reach for you, you won’t be able to see me, to talk to me, to be the kind of person I know and love, and it’s been excruciating, having to live with that knowledge.”

“Jihoon, what are you trying to get at?”

He takes a deep breath, as if readying himself for something horrible, “what I mean to say, is that I lied.”

“What? You lied about what, Jihoon?”

“It’s about—” he throws up his hands, “don’t you have any alcohol around here? Why do I have to have this conversation with you while sober?”

“Jihoon, I just moved in today. Of course, I don’t have alcohol, you idiot.” I cross my arms over my chest, “if you have nothing else to say, then you should leave. It’s getting late, and I have a lot of work left to do around the house tomorrow. If all you came here for was to apologise then it’s fine, I accept your apology—”

“Damn, woman, will you let me finish? I’m trying to get at something!”

“Well then, get at it faster!”

“I lied about getting over you!”

One thing I hate about this apartment is how silent it is. In my previous apartment, at all times of the night, there would be someone making a noise, and I hated how it would disturb my sleep. Right now, there’s silence. There’s silence and then there’s us, standing in the half-dark. Jihoon looks like he wants to say something, but has been holding himself back.

“What-what do you mean?” I say, after what seems like a lifetime, “what the fuck are you talking about?”

“I said that I lied about getting over you. I liked you back when I was doing my military service, and I still like you now.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I can assure you, I’m just as serious about this as I am with my work.”

“Then are you saying—”

“I like you. I’ve liked you for a long time, and I think I’ll continue liking you for a long time.”

“Jihoon, I don’t like you like that.”

“I know,” Jihoon looks pained, and for the first time in my life, I want to lie and say that no, Jihoon, I like you too, but I can’t, “look, my feelings are my own. You don’t have to reciprocate them. You and I are separate people, and I don’t want to impose my feelings on you.”

“Then why did you say all this?” my voice communicates all my frustration, “then why did you come here and tell me all this, if you didn’t want to sway me? You were the person who kept telling me to move on, and now you come here and tell me this?”

“Because I felt like I was dying!” Jihoon yells, “not talking to you, not seeing you, not being able to text you, all this made me feel like I was dying. I didn’t tell you anything because I wanted to preserve our friendship, but when I can’t see you around, my heart feels as though it’s stopped functioning. All I could think about was you.”

“Jihoon,” I say, hoping my voice doesn’t betray my frustrations, “you don’t like me in a romantic light.”

“Don’t presume my feelings.”

“I’m not! I’m just pointing out that we have been friends for a long time, and that your feelings for me might just be you overthinking your feelings of friendship and thinking its something else when really, its just friendship. I don’t think you like me romantically, Jihoon. I think you’re just confused.”

Jihoon doesn’t say anything for a long time. I would have felt better if he had cursed me, or if he had become angry, but all that remains of Jihoon right now, in this moment, is someone whose feelings are replaced with—just nothing.

Jihoon checks his watch, “look, it’s late, you should get some sleep.”

He turns around, opening the door, and pauses for a moment before turning around. “I don’t care if you’ve stopped, or if you’re terrified of moving forward. I’ll stay there with you until you’re ready. I don’t care how long it takes.”

“And another thing.”

“Yes?” I ask, voice cracking in the middle of the word. This is going to haunt me in my nightmares.

“Your dream,” Jihoon says, hand on the door handle, “I’ll help you fulfil it. No matter what it takes.”

—

Seungkwan is at my door the next morning, even before I’m fully dressed, carrying a box of Jeju oranges. Even before I can open the door fully, he’s in my apartment, staring at my face.

“My mom sent these for you, by the way,” he says, then takes a look at my face, “whoa, Sunbae, you look like you haven’t slept all night.”

“I know, I know,” I mutter, “just had some things to think about, that’s all.”

“Think about?” Seungkwan starts to unpack my crockeries, “you look like hell. I’m not kidding, you look awful.”

“Wow, thanks, Seungkwan, that sounds like a great compliment.” I mutter, settling down into a chair, “coming into my home on a Saturday and telling me I look ugly, way to make a girl feel great.”

“I’m not being sarcastic, I’m concerned. There’s a difference.” He sits in the chair next to mine, “is there anything I can help with?”

“Seungkwan, you’re sweet, but this is something I can’t really talk about.” I mutter, “some things aren’t meant to be shared with everyone.”

And really, what can I say? ‘oh, don’t worry, Seungkwan, my best friend since university, the person with whom I haven’t been talking to for the past few weeks, came to my apartment last night to confess that he had feelings for me?’ How does one even begin that conversation? Not to mention the embarrassment that Jihoon would face if I were to ever spill the beans to the guys. He’s always been intensely private, even in his romantic affairs. To spill his secrets would just be cruel.

It's really, really not as though I haven’t received romantic confessions. There have been people who have asked me out, who have said that they liked me, from university classmates to people at work. Even in school, when all I could think about were university entrance examinations, and how I had to get into a university in Seoul because that was where my sister went too, I had a few people tell me they had feelings for me, I have had people get angry when I turned them down, I’ve had people get sad when I said, no, I’m sorry. Yet, all this feels new. What do you actually say when someone you’ve known for years, tells you that they hold feelings for you? What is the appropriate thing to say, especially if you don’t know what your own feelings are?

“You know, I grew up with three older sisters, right?”

“Yes, you keep reminding me of it every other day.”

“Yes, so,” Seungkwan leans forward, inspecting my face, “you look like you’ve got something weighing down on your mind. And while I might not be Joshua-hyung or Jihoon-hyung, I can be a pretty good listener.”

“No, I don’t think I can tell you this. It’s not my secret to tell, and even then, I don’t want to burden you with something that shouldn’t be your responsibility in the first place.”

“Sunbae,” Seungkwan asks, “does this have anything to do with Jihoon-hyung?”

I stare at him. “When did you get so fucking perceptive?”

“So, it is,” he leans back in his chair, self-satisfied and smug as hell, “I knew it. I knew he’d do something like this.”

“You knew?” I ask, and Seungkwan nods, “you knew, and you didn’t think of telling me? not even once? Not even a single heads-up?”

“And? What would we even say? ‘Jihoon-hyung likes you, please be advised he might try to confess his feelings?’ Would you have even liked it?”

“You’re right, I wouldn’t.” I shake my head, “really? This is something everyone knew about?”

Seungkwan nods, “I think most of us are aware of Jihoon-hyung’s feelings towards you, given how he acts.”

I hold up a hand, “Wait, pause. How he acts? What do you mean, how he acts? I’ve never seen him be anything other than perfectly normal with me.”

“That’s the problem with you,” Seungkwan clarifies, “your baseline is different when it comes to Jihoon-hyung. He treats you much more differently than he does all of us, and you’ve never noticed? Not even once?”

“No, clearly, I haven’t, Seungkwan, explain.”

Seungkwan takes a deep breath, as if trying to gather his thoughts into a proper sequence, and begins, “well, for once, he always does what you want, even if he is initially against it. With anyone else? You can’t even convince him to lift a single finger, but he drove all the way to the restaurant that one time, dropping the recording for Soonyoung’s new album. Sure, he didn’t get in trouble, but he did that just because you called.”

“He ran out of a recording session?” I have to repeat myself, because in all the years that I have known Jihoon, he’s always put his work before everything else. In university, he spent days and nights in the makeshift recording studio he had in his home, only venturing out to get food once every two days. Even his recording studio was off-limits to us, until he had finished working on a project. That Jihoon left Soonyoung in the middle of a recording session to come pick me up because I was drunk? “Should I apologise to Soonyoung?”

“The only person you should be apologising to, is me,” Seungkwan send me a dirty look that would have anyone else cringing, “I come here to help you unpack and decorate your home, and this is what I have to hear?”

“You’re a traitor. You’ve been hiding Jihoon’s feelings from me for god knows how long, and now you expect me to be nice to you? Get a grip on yourself.”

“This is,” Seungkwan wags a finger at me, “this is just shooting the messenger. You think the others haven’t kept his secret from you?”

“What? Even Jeonghan-oppa? He’s betrayed me too?”

Seungkwan smiles, “there are no allies in this stupid game you both are playing. We’ve all known about his feelings ever since he came back from the military and hung up that stupid photo of the two of you on his wall. He would have had it framed it if the quality wasn’t like it was taken on a microwave.”

I think about the picture, Jihoon with the flat cap and me beside him, flashing a wide, toothy smile. “He tried to get it framed?”

“Seungcheol-hyung had to talk him out of it, because it’s insane, having a picture of another girl framed and putting in your bedroom while you’re trying to get a girlfriend is not the best thing to do, in retrospect.”

“Ah yes, wasn’t this when he was dating the music major? The intern at the office?” I’m trying to keep my voice light, but unfortunately, I know everything about his past relationships, the serious and the casual. The girls at university, the intern he dated for a month before she dumped him, and the office worker who he dated for a year before she finally grew sick of him and left. “I don’t remember them that well.”

“Liar. You remember every detail.” Seungkwan grins, “just like Jihoon-hyung can recite the names of all your exes backwards if he wanted to, “You remember every detail about all of Jihoon-hyung’s relationships. Yes, this was when he was dating the intern, and Seungcheol-hyung pointed out that it probably would not be the best look to frame a picture of the girl your girlfriend hates, and put it in your bedroom where you could see it every morning and every night.”

“May we all thank Seungcheol-oppa for his infinite wisdom.” I say, and Seungkwan gives me a high five, “wait, she hated me? but I was nice to her! And not fake nice, which is what I generally am, I was actually nice to her!”

“She still hated you, though. There was nothing you could do about that relationship.”

“Really?”

“Really. It’s the same the other way around, too. Remember when you were dating that artist who hated the idea of Jihoon-hyung being around?”

“Oh, him? I remember that. He once tore down all the pictures I had with Jihoon, insisting that I was cheating on him. in his defence, we were twenty-three, so, I don’t blame him for making bad choices.”

Seungkwan groans, “this way, it’s going to take at least a hundred years before you wake up, too. Sunbae! Have you not realised it yet, or do I have to spell it out for you?”

“Realised what?”

“That you like hyung as well? That its not just him who’s chasing, but also you?”

I scoff, “no, I don’t like Jihoon! I don’t know why you are saying this, but I don’t like Jihoon. He’s simply a friend of mine.”

“You once drove to Hwacheon in the middle of winter for his birthday.”

“That’s different! It was his birthday, he was in the military, I had to do something! Besides, he only got one day for his leave, and none of you guys could go.”

“Sunbae, driving to Hwacheon is a bit too much, don’t you think?” Seungkwan stares at me, “you’re telling me you drove through snow and went halfway to North Korea for your friend?”

“Yes! No! I don’t know!” I wail, falling onto the floor on a heap, “all I know is that I want Jihoon in my life. I can’t live without him; these past few weeks, its as though life has lost its meaning for me. I don’t find my work fun anymore; I don’t have anyone to talk to anymore. I can’t give him up.”

“I don’t know about you, but that sounds pretty romantic to me.”

I narrow my eyes, “you’re just enjoying the fun, aren’t you?”

Seungkwan giggles, “and what if I tell you I am?”

“I’d kill you.”

Seungkwan says nothing, just continues to grin as though he’s watching a sitcom, or a variety show. What would a variety show based on my life look like? Something like I Live Alone, but entirely for people struggling with romance problems; if I worked in a bigger broadcasting company, I would have pitched this idea. People would get on there, and just talk about their romance problems.

“Sunbae—no, noona.”

Seungkwan calling me by the familiar honorific catches my attention. Since I have known him, Seungkwan has never once referred to me in that familiar a tone, always with the more respectful sunbae, reserved for departmental seniors. Especially since joining the news desk, he has refused to call me anything but. It gives me a sense of respect, obviously, but it also seems as though he has always kept me at arm’s length.

“You’re being familiar with me, Seungkwan,” I say, “what’s happened?”

He sits next to me on the floor, staring at me, “noona, have you ever really done anything for yourself?”

I give him a look. “What do you mean, if I have done anything for myself? Everything I do is for myself; I think we’ve established that. If you made a list of the most selfish people you know, I would probably rank top five in there.”

“That’s what you think. You always keep talking about how you’re doing things for yourself, but in reality, all you do, is based on the needs of others.”

“I think you’re trying to make me into a martyr, Seungkwan, when all I have done is be a selfish person.”

“I also think that you consider yourself to be a selfish person because that’s what you’ve been taught to believe.”

“Seungkwan,” I say, mildly, “look at the society we live in. its either hyper individualistic, or it’s based on outdated systems of collective identity; either way, I’m not actually doing anything I want to do myself. It is all things I’ve been taught. How to be, how to act, how to think.”

“And that isn’t wrong, per se, but you have to think, at some point, that your existence is based on how others think of you. Even with Jihoon-hyung, you’re just going off of what we might think of you, what he might think of you. Have you even figured out your own feelings?”

“And what if we break up? What if I say to Jihoon, that yes, I’d like to date you too, but we break up soon? Within one month, two months? I’m terrified of losing him, to the point where I’m happy to be his friend just to keep him in my life. Why else do you think I rejected him?”

“You rejected him?” Seungkwan screeches, “noona, you’re in love with him, and you rejected him?”

“Being friends with him is more important to me than being his girlfriend,” I say, “to be his girlfriend is something I don’t want to imagine.”

“Because you don’t want to be his girlfriend, or because you don’t want to get your hopes up?”

I groan, lying back down on the floor, “I don’t know, and I don’t want to think about it either.”

Seungkwan smiles, “hey maybe, you should try and think about what you want to do, before doing what everyone else expects of you. Even if that’s what you are going to end up doing anyway, maybe, you should at least be aware of what you want.”

—

On Monday, I walk into the office with my eyes bloodshot, and dark circles underneath them, ten minutes after the team meeting has begun. Both the Editor and the Assistant Editor take one look at my face and decide not to tell me anything for showing up late to the meeting.

“We were talking about your column, Sunbae,” Haewon says as I nurse my coffee, “the readers loved it. We’ve been getting so many responses and letters to the office after you began the column.”

“We are?” I ask, “who the hell is screening through the letters, then?”

“I am,” the Assistant Editor says, “I figured you didn’t need one more thing on your plate, and I sorted out whatever you had to. For the first time in a long while, we have fan mail coming to the office.”

“Huh?” I catch the last part of that sentence, “we have fan mail?”

“Yes, and a lot of it, too,” the Assistant editor smiles at me, “at this rate, we might start a radio show if we have the funds for it.”

“We’ll never have the funds for it,” I wave a hand, “having a radio show is out of the question.”

“Still, it seems nice that the desk is getting a lot of other attention too, other than doing book reviews and movie reviews.” The editor says.

“You do realise, all this is coming at the expense of my sleep?” I grumble, “this is the worst idea you could ever have. A radio show? I can barely talk to people. You want me to go on a show and talk to people in real-time?”

“Yes, yes, which is why we are not thinking about it,” the Editor clarifies, “you just need to continue writing the column as you have been. That much is enough for the desk.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes, Sunbae,” Seungkwan slides an energy drink towards me, “it’s enough for the desk if you just do things as they come by. No one is asking you to do more than what’s required.”

“You say that now, Seungkwan, but pretty soon they’ll be asking favours from you, too.” I smile at him, “don’t let anyone walk over you here. Its difficult to stop them once you’ve begun letting them have their way.”

During lunch break, Seungkwan sidles up to me in the cafeteria, where the members of the desk have congregated (on news of them serving galbi-tang), and asks, “Sunbae, have you finished moving in? Jeonghan-hyung wanted me to invite you to a party this weekend.”

“Why didn’t he invite me himself?” I ask through a mouthful of beef, “has he lost my number?”

“No, he’ll probably invite you personally, but he wanted me to tell you beforehand.”

I narrow my eyebrows, “what am I, some sort of minister? Why are there levels of protocol when approaching me for an event?”

Seungkwan shrugs, “you know how Jeonghan-hyung is. You once told him you were uncomfortable at a party, and he’s taken that to heart ever since.”

I roll my eyes. The party in question was one thrown in the first year of university, after appropriate introductions had been made, and me and Jihoon had been invited out to a party by Joshua and his friends, where I got blind drunk and regretted it the next morning. Ever since that night, the boys have been particular about when to invite me out, none more so than Jeonghan, who apparently vetted all his invitations through Seungkwan, “tell him I’ll be there. And from now on, don’t let him vet his applications through you. If he wants to invite me out, he can call me himself. I don’t mind.”

“You do realise, if I relay your message verbatim to hyung, he’s going to be even more cautious of you?”

“Well, I’ll tell him myself, then.”

“Don’t tell him.”

I stare at Seungkwan, who looks serious, “really, sunbae, let other people care about you once in a while. Jeonghan-hyung is only mindful of your boundaries because he doesn’t want to overstep. He doesn’t see you as a burden, or as someone he needs to treat with kid gloves for the rest of his life.”

“Well, doesn’t matter what he thinks. If he continues to treat me like I’m a child, others might get annoyed with his actions.”

“Others? You mean the people that respect you and are cognizant of your boundaries and your shortcomings?” Seungkwan places a piece of meat in my rice bowl, I’m almost done with eating, “sunbae, people that make accommodations for you aren’t doing it because they secretly hate you, or that they’re bothered by your presence in events. They’re doing it because they want you to be there, and they like you enough to go out of their way to make a place for you at the table.”

“Seungkwan, this is much more complicated than that.”

“I don’t see why it has to be so complicated,” he says, standing up, “you keep being kind to people, but when they want to extend that same kindness to you, you reject it, saying its excessive. Aren’t you hurting yourself in the long run?”

“Seungkwan,” I hold my head in my hands, “I can’t just change my way of thinking.”

“Yes, I know,” he shakes his head, “just that—you should try at least.”

—

When I enter my apartment that evening, there’s a cloud hanging over my head. Its not simply the absence of Jihoon, but also Seungkwan’s words. To think that I haven’t been trying to accept the attentions of people, well, why am I trying to deny it? its correct.

My phone rings, and I pick it up without even checking the caller ID, “hello?”

“I had to hear from Jihoon that you had moved.”

I sigh. This is the last think I wanted to do at this moment, have a conversation with my mother, “sorry, I didn’t have a lot of opportunities to talk to anyone. I was too busy with work these past few weeks.”

“Still, it would have been nice to know that you moved, from you, and not from Jihoon.”

“Wait, mom, why—why are you talking to Jihoon instead of me?”

My mother laughs on the other end. It’s a nice thing, to hear her laugh, “because Jihoon, no, not just him, all of your friends call me more than you do. Jihoon even came by our house a few weeks ago, and had a meal with us.”

I sigh, “really, Jihoon—he’s going to piss me off at this rate.”

“No, don’t take out your frustrations on Jihoon. He’s a nice boy.”

I wonder how my mother would react if I told her that her ‘nice boy’ stormed into my apartment and told me he was in love with me ever since he went for his military service. She would probably jump with joy. “Sorry, mom,” I say, hoping my thoughts aren’t seeping into my voice, “I just started a new column at work.”

“Really? That’s so nice, I hope they aren’t overworking you.”

“No, mom, they’re not. I came home right on time today.”

“That’s good.” She says. I say nothing. What else is there to say? For someone who’s been alienated form their family for so long, all that remains is a string of hollow formalities and conversations that die out in a moment.

“How’s my sister?” I ask, in an effort to continue the conversation, “has she talked to you recently?”

My mother perks right up, “have I told you, your sister is getting married? She’s marrying Yong-Hwa in the spring. Has she not told you yet?”

In fact, my sister had told me, had told me how she was getting married to the love of her life, a prosecutor, and how she was envisioning the rest of her life with him, with children, a happy home, and more. It made me jealous; to see someone achieve their dreams when you are struggling with your own is not an easy thing.

“I heard,” I say, “how’s dad? Are his health problems persisting? Should I send more vitamins?”

“No, no, he’s perfectly fine. He’s still working as a lawyer, even though the doctor has told him not to. He says he’ll continue to work till he’s eighty.”

“Hah…dealing with father is tiring, isn’t it?” I groan, “I’ll come down the next time I get some time off. I’ll talk him into retiring properly.”

“You don’t have to do that,” my mother says, “knowing that you’re working hard is good enough for me, at least, this way, I can think that you’re doing well.”

“That’s good, then,” I reply, “sorry, mom, I’m getting another call. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Okay, but don’t go for too long without talking to us.”

This is fine. To know that my parents are doing well, its okay. I can hold on for longer if that’s what helps them. I’ll be the daughter they’re proud of.

—

I’ve been wandering for far too long. Always trying to be the best version of myself. But what lies at the end of this journey? Is it just a means of fulfilling my parents’ wishes?

On most days, I want to be alone. So, I push people away, just to benefit myself. It has got nothing to do with how I feel about them, it’s just how I feel most at ease. I’ve always been on my own, its just easier. Its easier to be the person people relied on, instead of the person who had to rely on others. But just for once, I’d like someone to tell me that it will be okay. It will be okay to break down, that it will be okay if I fail. My life has been so barren, that even trying to do anything otherwise is too much. For so long I’ve been someone whose life has been dictated by the wishes of others, that I fear I wont even be able to live well if I decided to live by my own.

What does it mean, to have a dream? I had a letter sent to me, saying that their dream is to find happiness on their own. Well, happiness is something that comes after a long time. I’m searching for it too, but I hope you find it, sincerely. To walk towards happiness isn’t something that’s easy. But I appreciate you for taking that step. To walk towards what you want. What you need.

There’s another letter, that says, ‘I don’t have a dream yet’. Don’t worry, a dream isn’t something that’s complicated. They aren’t supposed to be; you’re supposed to find something that makes you happy, that makes you want to live again. That’s all. that is all there is to a dream. All around us, people are living day to day, they’re living without finding what makes them happy. I hope it finds you soon.

I’m tired. I’m tired of trying to find something that gives me purpose. The way I’m living now, it’s enough for me, to live an average existence, to live in a way that gives me peace, if not happiness.

What happens when that peace is taken away, too?

—

Jeonghan throws good parties. That’s a given. It’s not as though he invites many people, or that his parties are a riot of good fun, but he always makes people feel at ease, if not with his actions, then with his words. Its who he is. A source of constant comfort, that I feel guilty for trying to take advantage of.

I arrive at his house after finishing work with a bottle of wine, hesitating before I press the doorbell. Jeonghan lives in a house in the middle of Seoul that he got for dirt cheap because the people who lived in there were violently murdered in the early ��00s, a fact that I had asked him about once, and he had simply brushed it of by saying that if there were ghosts, he would befriend them. I’d given up on asking him after that one exchange.

The door opens within ten seconds of me ringing the doorbell, and Jeonghan greets me with a wide smile, “I thought you wouldn’t come! Can I give you a hug?”

I nod, “I told you I would be there,” but the rest of my sentence is drowned out by Jeonghan enveloping me into a large hug. He smells like an expensive perfume, mixed with the familiar smell of chicken and beer. Ah, so its that kind of party.

“Make yourself at home, the rest of them already have.” He says, ushering me into the living room, “the rest of the boys are already here. We were just waiting for you.”

“Waiting for me?”

“Because, my dear writer, you’ve always turned down any invites for parties for five years now. Now that you’ve accepted my invite, you’re the star of this gathering.”

I don’t say anything, but my discomfort must have shown on my face, because he suddenly stops me, “hey, just so you know, I meant that as a joke. Seungcheol just got a big promotion at work, so he’s been bragging about that for an hour now. I doubt anyone will pay attention to you.”

“That’s nice.”

All around the low table, there are cans of beer, snacks, and boxes of fried chicken. Jeonghan must have prepared for a lot of people to come. Seungcheol is talking about his job, how he was now the team manager of marketing, and how happy it made him, to have so much responsibility at such a young age. There’s Chan, Vernon, and Seungkwan, gossiping about their respective fields of work, and Mingyu is sleeping on the end of the table, while Minghao and Wonwoo talk about how work has been nowadays. Jun is noticeably missing from the group, but I can see him in the kitchen, making himself another drink, and then, there’s Jihoon. Seated between Joshua and Seokmin, talking about something I can’t hear. I stand still in my tracks, unable to move. What do I say? After rejecting him so painfully, what do I say? I’m sorry, Jihoon? Sorry about what? Sorry about not being able to accept genuine affection in the fears that it might ruin the one good thing I have for myself?

“Aren’t you going to sit?” Jeonghan asks, gesturing to a seat beside Jihoon, “I thought you would be more comfortable if you sat beside Jihoon, since you’ve known him for longer.”

In fact, I’d rather sit anywhere other than beside Jihoon, but I take the seat next to him gingerly, and Seokmin eagerly moves over. Seokmin is like a child, eager, soft around the edges, and someone you want to protect, no matter what. Maybe if I could look into people’s minds, Seokmin’s would be pure, devoid of any harshness of the world; is that why I tried to protect him even when I had no right to?

“Noona,” Seokmin giggles, “have I told you about the play I’m performing in? I’ll give you a ticket, so you have to come, okay?”

His energy is so infectious, I can’t help but smile with him, “of course, I’ll come to see you.”

“Are you okay?” Jihoon asks, his voice so quiet I barely miss it, “you don’t really come to occasions like these.”

“Felt like it,” I mutter, “new year, new me, or should I say new apartment, new me?”

Jihoon laughs, “yeah, you seem like you’ve changed. Your hands are shaking.”

I look down at my hands, and true enough, they’re shaking. Whether from nervousness or something else entirely, I don’t know, but they’re shaking. I ball my hands into fists. Whatever happens, don’t let anyone know what you’re going through. “just tired, perhaps.”

“You have been working too much,” Joshua pipes up, “you never reply to any of my texts anymore.”

“That’s because you keep asking me about flower arrangements,” I reply, “why would I look at flowers when I can’t smell them?”

“Sunbae is very busy at the news desk,” Seungkwan pipes up, “did you know, she has a new co—”

“Shut up, Seungkwan,” I mutter, reaching over to stuff a chicken leg in his mouth, “the work has been just harder these few days.”

Jihoon stares at me; it’s the same look he has in his eyes whenever he’s landed on something to probe, and sure enough, he asks, “why? What’s going on at the office?”

“Nothing!” I say, far too quick for it to even go past Seokmin or Joshua, (whom everyone, not just me, have deemed as the most scammable) “its nothing! Seungkwan just wanted to brag about his workload to everyone else.”

“Why the fuck would he do that?” Vernon asks, but is largely ignored by Jeonghan (my angel prince saviour Jeonghan) who arrives with drinks, a grumpy Jun in tow, announcing, “who wants shots!” and despite pushing thirty, Seungcheol, who had paused bragging about his work promotion, raised his hands, grabbing one of the shot glasses. Even Mingyu wakes up from his nap, raising his hand in the air and grabbing one of the shot glasses. They’re all going to regret it, I think to myself, then, feeling Jihoon’s eyes on me, grab a couple of the shot glasses myself. The drink is sugary, and multicoloured (Jun once wanted to be a bartender in university). It goes down far smoother than expected, since I’ve had Jun’s drinks since university, and they have tasted like battery acid far too many times for me to expect something nice out of his concoctions.

“This is actually nice,” Chan says, “hyung, what did you put in this?”

“Won’t be telling you,” Jun pulls a face, “you’ll just make it for other people and then take credit for it.”

Of course, this ensues in a squabble, with Chan loudly protesting that he would never do that to his beloved Jun-hyung (he would, I know) and Jun proclaiming that Chan is nothing but a dirty jerk who wants to put his grubby little hands, on Jun’s hard work and his creation (most likely, it was from a Reddit forum on bartending). One by one, the rest of them enter the argument, and I lean back into my seat, laughing at their antics. Its always chaos when I meet the boys, but somehow, its also peaceful. They’re loud, boisterous, and from whatever pictures Joshua and Jihoon had shared from their one shared ‘boys’ trip’, dirty as hell (these people laid out a carpet of towels instead of just drying their feet) but they know how to put someone’s mind at ease. Or at least, my mind at ease. I don’t know about others.

Its almost two in the morning when they quiet down. Jeonghan might have bought this house because it was dirt cheap and he wanted to make friends with the ghosts, but this house has one of the most gorgeous verandas I’ve ever seen. It looks out onto a peaceful Seoul street, and in the middle of the night, there’s no one here to complain if I smoke a cigarette.

I light one up, letting out a puff of air as I sit down on the marble flooring. It has been a long time since I smoked a cigarette (three days), and some of the smoke goes into my eyes when I let it out of my lungs. Its not enough to make me cough, but my eyes water nonetheless.

“You can smoke inside, if you want.” Jeonghan appears at the corner of my field of vision, “in fact, I think Minghao is smoking one right now.”

“Just wanted to get away from the noise a little,” I say, shaking the cigarette, “want to sit beside me?”

He shrugs, but crosses his legs and sits beside me on the marble flooring anyway.

After barely a minute, he turns to me, and without any warning, says, “so, has Jihoon told you he’s in love with you?”

I start coughing. Big, hacking coughs, and he just stares at me while I recover. I cannot believe I called him my saviour. “What—what do you mean?”

Jeonghan, the irritating bastard, still has that same, serene smile on his face, “you can’t possibly think that we all spent the last few years with our eyes closed now, have you? We’ve all known about Jihoon’s feelings for you, and now that you’re here, I can see that its reciprocated.”

“Wha-how are you even making these assumptions? I don’t have any feelings for him!” I whisper, “and yes, I know about his feelings. Even if they caught me somewhat by surprise, I’m aware of what kind of feelings he has for me.”

“And?” he leans close, “how does that make you feel?”

“How should it make you feel? I feel worried.”

“Worried?” he pulls a face, “if you wanted to get him off of your back, you’d say something like ‘I feel uncomfortable’, but you aren’t, because you don’t really feel uncomfortable, do you?”

I stare at him, fuck Jeonghan and his perceptive nature. “it’s not that I don’t feel uncomfortable, I just-don’t see the point in his confession.”

“Why? Why would a mere confession have you feeling this way? If you don’t want to accept it, then just say so. No one here,” Jeonghan points to the room, “will fault you for that. In fact, I think they’ll all commend you for it. Jihoon can be a tad bit difficult at times.”

I scoff, “he’s not difficult, he’s just—Jihoon.”

Jeonghan laughs, “see, I knew it. I knew there was something else there that you weren’t letting on. Now, come on, tell me,” and then spreads his arms wide, “tell oppa what’s bothering you.”

“If you refer to yourself as oppa again, I might have to kill you.”

This time, he laughs loud enough for people to hear inside, “fine, fine. I won’t be doing that anymore. But tell me, my dear writer, have you never thought about it? even once?”

I shrug, “of course I have. Everyone has those kinds of thoughts once in a while, I’m no different from the others, of course I’ve thought about it.”

“And?”

I shake my head, “nothing good will ever come out of it, because it’s a fifty-fifty chance. We either stick together until the end of time, or we break up and I can’t interact with him ever again.”

“So, you’d prefer to not try at all.”

“Yes, that’s exactly it.”

Jeonghan says nothing for a long time, and then finally, shrugs, “it’s your choice. If you don’t want to do something, then you shouldn’t force yourself to. But can I tell you something?”

“Yes?”

“When did he say that he started having feelings for you?”

I think for a moment, “since his military service.”

Jeonghan grins, sly, just the way I know his smile works, “As someone who’s seen Jihoon since his university days, I can tell you something. He’s got it wrong.”

“Wrong?”

“Yes. He’s liked you since the day you walked into his life. There has been no moment in time when he was not in love with you. He might have realised it late in life, but he’s always been in love with you.”

I stare. Jeonghan isn’t the kind of person who makes random statements, so for him to say this, its strange. Jihoon has been in love with me ever since the first day? but that doesn’t make sense. “You do realise he’s dated other people too, while he was friends with me?”

“Of course, I know that. Both you and him have been running away from your actual feelings, but that doesn’t make it any more apparent that you have both been in love with each other since the day you met. Or at least, it has been that way for Jihoon.”

With that, Jeonghan stands up, dusting off his trousers, “there’s a guest bedroom in there for you. If you’re tired, just go inside and sleep.”

I look inside, where Chan is currently trying to balance a beer can on his forehead, “and the rest of them?”

“The rest of them can sleep on the couch,” he says, “it’s the least they can do after creating such a ruckus in my own home.”

“But you invited them.”

There’s a slightly evil glint in his eyes as he says, “yes, yes I did.”

—

The next morning, I wake up to people talking all over themselves, and the smell of pancakes wafting in the air. That has got to be Joshua. After cleaning up in the attached bathroom, I walk out of the guest bedroom, coming face-to-face with Jun, who’s carrying in his hands a very large tray, heaped with pancakes and a singular glass of milk.

“Is this for me?” I ask, and he nods, gesturing towards the kitchen, where Joshua is busy cooking a meal for thirteen people. Or fourteen, if you count me.

“Sorry, I can’t have breakfast right now,” I sidestep past him, and Jun follows me out into the kitchen, “sorry, but I have to leave right now.”

“Without having breakfast?” Jun asks, setting the tray down, where Chan promptly picks one up and stuffs it into his face, “you should have something at least.”

“Had too much to drink last night,” I offer up as a feeble excuse, avoiding Jihoon’s gaze. It’s strange, piercing in a way that I am not really used to, “I should probably get going. There’s still so much to be done in my apartment.”

“Speaking of apartments,” Wonwoo speaks through a mouthful of pancake, “when are you going to call us all over?”

“As soon as I can,” I reply, “I’ll host a potluck. You all can bring a dish, and it’ll be a party.”

“Instead of that, just make Mingyu cook,” Soonyoung grins, “he’ll be eager to help if it involves you. And cooking. But mostly, you.”

I open my mouth to say something, but Jihoon stands up, slipping on his stupid khaki jacket, “here, I’ll give you a ride. Come on, then.”

“Ah but hyung, you still have so much on your plate—” Chan is promptly cut off in the middle of his sentence by a swift elbow to the ribs by Seungkwan, “hyung! Why the hell did you do that?”

Jihoon ignores the squabble currently breaking out at the dining table, and stares at me, his car keys dangling from his left hand, “want to come?”

Before I can say anything to accept the offer of a ride, Soonyoung raises a hand, “Jihoon, weren’t you supposed to meet the other producers and sound engineers today? I’m supposed to be there too, but will you not be attending?”

Even though Jeonghan hisses at Soonyoung to shut up, I can already see the cogs in Jihoon’s mind turning. Clearly, he wanted to talk to me, or at least, he wanted to make an effort to talk to me, “I’ll take a taxi, then.” I say, trying to make an excuse for myself, “don’t worry, Jihoon, you don’t have to drop me home.”

“No, I can drop you off and then go to the office,” he begins, but Joshua cuts him off (while wearing a Rilakkuma apron) saying, “can’t Mingyu take her home? He’s going in the same direction as her, so he can drop her easily. You don’t have to overexert yourself and drop her off at the apartment when you’re going in the opposite direction.”

While not one to turn down a free ride, I raise my hand to complain that I don’t need to take Mingyu’s car to go back home, but Mingyu walks into the room at that moment, and before I can say anything, Joshua turns to him, saying, “are you going back home right now?”

“Yes, hyung, I’m off for the weekend since Minghao is handling the meetings this time around,” he says brightly, “I can drop her off!”

“That’s settled, then,” Chan announces, “Jihoon-hyung can take Soonyoung to the company.”

“You brat,” Soonyoung scowls, “why is Jihoon hyung and I’m just Soonyoung? Do you have no respect for your elders?”

“I once saw you vomit into a flowerpot,” Chan says, “at that moment, you lost all respect in my eyes.”

Before another scuffle can break out over breakfast, Mingyu says loudly, “I’m leaving then!”

—

I’m a big fan of travelling in silence. Even if it is with someone I like, I prefer to sit in silence and contemplate, instead of chattering on about my life. That’s a lie. Mingyu chatters on and on about the new collection and how its selling better than he or Minghao expected, “This is such great news for a fashion brand that was launched less than a decade ago, noona,” he says, while driving his fancy car, and I sit still in my seat and pray that he hasn’t noticed the awkwardness between me and Jihoon. I don’t expect him to notice, either. Mingyu might be nice and well-meaning, but he’s also painfully oblivious.

Which is why it takes me by surprise when he turns to me, while the car is halted at a stop sign, and says, “so, have you figured out what to tell Jihoon-hyung yet?”

I cough, “how-how did you know about that?”

Mingyu laughs, “you think we all were unaware of how he feels towards you? Pfft. Noona, we’ve been observing him since he was in university. He’s always been gone for you.”

I stare resolutely out of the window, “you’re evidently kidding.”

“Noona. He used to stay up with you when you had exams, he used to make sure you weren’t dead when you used to hibernate for long periods of time, he even had a space for you in the stupid apartment studio, are you seriously telling me you had no idea that he was in love with you all this while?”

“Of course, I didn’t!” I want to scream and tear out my hair in frustration, “of course not! I thought he was just looking out for me because I was his only female friend, and after university, I thought to myself, that this is how he usually is! Why would I think that he’s in love with me?”

“Well, he thought that it would be enough to impress you.”

“We were twenty-two! I thought he was an immature weirdo who had no idea how to maintain female friendships!”

“Yes, he’s usually like that,” Mingyu resumes driving, “but he’s got degrees of being familiar.”

“I know. Jihoon’s like a cat. He approaches you at his own pace. Doing anything else will just push him off.”

Mingyu laughs, “you know what, noona, I think you’re a lot like a cat too.”

“Kim Mingyu, watch what you’re saying.”

He grins, “you know I’m correct.”

“Doesn’t mean you have to say it this way.”

“The way I see it,” he says, slowing down as the car turns into the parking lot of the apartment, “you’ve always approached people at your own pace too. Seokmin and I were overenthusiastic when meeting you for the first time, and you refused to even acknowledge me for the rest of the semester.”

“Sorry about that, really.”

“We didn’t mind then, and we don’t mind now,” he shrugs, “its just who you are. And to accept the kind of person that one is, and then to continue caring for them, yeah, that’s love.”

“Jihoon’s just my friend,” I say, getting out of the car, “he’s just my friend, nothing more.”

“Noona, the fact that you keep repeating this to all of us, makes me wonder who it is that you’re trying to convince. Is it me, the rest of us, Jihoon-hyung, or yourself?”

“Kim Mingyu,” I warn, “you’re overstepping.”

“Sorry, noona, but I have to ask,” he walks into the elevator after me, “have you always seen him as a friend, and nothing more? I saw how you used to, no, how you still treat him differently than the rest of us. You’ve always had a soft spot where he was concerned. In fact, you still do, and you’re hiding it.”

“Drop it, Mingyu. You have no idea what happened the last time I said anything about this.”

The elevator dings, opening onto our floor, and Mingyu steps out right behind me, “Then tell us, noona. We, all of us, Jihoon-hyung, everyone around you—we are stumbling around in the dark because you’ve been so closed off about your past.”

I shake my head, pressing the keys in the keypad lock, “maybe, you shouldn’t be knowing about this one, Mingyu.”

The door closes behind me with an audible click, and even without pressing an eye to the keyhole, I know Mingyu is still standing in front of my door, deliberating over whether or not to knock. In the end, his loyalty wins over his curiosity; he walks away, over to his own apartment.

I sink into a heap at the doorway. What do I do? I know I’ve told Jihoon to ignore the confession and be exactly as we were before, but that is not possible anymore, now that I know how he feels towards me. every interaction I have with him will be grappling with this same truth, and I’ll always be wondering about how he feels towards me.

Out of habit, I pull my phone out of my pocket, swiping through messages and emails, when one of them catches my eye. It’s a simple, single-line message.

Read your column. I know its anonymous, but I know how you write.

—Sungwon

How bad is rock bottom? Is it possible to go below that? I have to remind myself to breathe, as I slowly collect myself from the floor, and go about the rest of my morning. Of course, I shouldn’t think about the people who have left me behind. It’s a disservice to myself. I’ve spent enough time and money in therapy to know that. But what happens when the past refuses to let go of you?

I dial the first number I can get my hands on. After three rings, Jeonghan picks up, his cheerful voice filling the line, “hi! Did you reach home already? Did Mingyu crash the car?”

“Oppa.” I say, “you have to listen to me carefully.”

“Why?” Jeonghan’s voice, so cheerful moments before, has been filled with anxiety, “what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I lie, even as Jihoon’s voice floats over the line, yelling is she okay? “don’t let Jihoon know anything’s happened, please.”

“Yes, you reached fine?” Jeonghan says, voice nonchalant, “okay, I’m in another room, tell me what’s wrong.”

“Jeonghan-oppa.” It’s taking all have to not break into sobs, “I once told a friend, that I liked them.”

“Okay, and?” his voice is kind, so kind, that it drowns out the other voices in my mind saying you don’t deserve this, “what happened?”

“He said—he told me that I’d ruined our friendship, and he never talked to me after that.”

“Oh, oh no, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry to hear that. What else can I say, that will help you feel better?”

“Just—hear me out, for now,” I continue, “and he’s never contacted me, but all of a sudden, he sent me an email last night.”

“What did he say in the email?”

“That he’s been following my writing. I don’t understand, how is it easy for people to be like this when they’ve hurt someone else?”

“Are you afraid Jihoon is going to break off all contact with you, and then email you years later like some kind of pathetic loser?” he scoffs, “if he did that, I would be first in line to break his legs.”

“No, I’m afraid I’m going to be that person to Jihoon,” I sob, “I think I’m going to hurt him and leave him behind, and that I’ll be the person to deal him that cruel hand.”

The line is silent on the other end.

“Jeonghan? Are you there?” I ask.

“It’s me.” Jihoon’s voice sounds rough around the edges, as though he’s been crying, “I heard everything.”

“Jihoon.” I plead, “please don’t do anything that’ll hurt you.”

“I’m coming over in ten minutes,” he mutters, hanging up.

And it’s done. Over. Fuck. I’ve thrown away years of friendship because I didn’t want to accept my own emotions and grow beyond the scared girl I was as a child.

I want to cry, but even that effort is too much for me, sinking down into a heap in the middle of my living room, listening to the sounds of the wall clock ticking down every second.

Even before ten minutes are up, the keypad beeps, before the door opens to reveal a very windswept Jihoon.

“How did you know my password?” is the only thing I can say to him.

He rolls his eyes, “you use the same password as my studio. Of course, I know your password.”

“Fair.”

Jihoon stares at me for a beat, then takes a deep breath, before kneeling down on the floor beside me, “I overheard everything.”

“I’m going to curse Jeonghan and his high-volume phone,” I mutter, “I told him to keep it a secret.”

“To be fair, he was only protecting you.” Jihoon laughs, “he didn’t know I was more persistent than he could ever imagine.”

I shoot him a dirty look. Jihoon sighs, “look, I know, the way I said things to you, wasn’t the most ideal—”

“They were horrible, actually,” I cut in, “you yelled at me that you loved me, and then you left.”

“—man, just let me finish,” Jihoon says, without any real spite, “but I wanted to tell you, that my feelings still haven’t, and will not in the future, affect the way I see you. I’ve always been proud to call you my friend, even if you keep secrets from me.”

“I don’t keep that many secrets.” I mutter.

“Really? Then what about the whole anonymous column thing?”

“You knew about that?”

Jihoon scoffs, “I’ve seen you write since the beginning of university. I know how you write better than anyone else, of course, I knew it was you.”

“Then why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I’m respectful.”

I scowl, “continue.”

“I just wanted to say that even if you wanted to push me away, you can’t,” Jihoon says, smug smile on his face, “I’m impossible to get rid of.”

“You’re not selling yourself very well.”

“You still haven’t given me an answer to my confession.”

“Look, Jihoon, it would never work,” I say, turning away from him, “we know too much about each other. We’ve seen each other’s worst moments. And what if we break up? Who’s going to tell the rest of the boys that we no longer have the same dynamic that we used to have and that its going to be different around us? They have the tact of a bull; you know how they are going to be.”

“That’s them,” he replies, “I’m asking about you. I want to know what you think.”

I sigh. Jihoon’s face is remarkably close to me; from here I can make out the tiny little freckles he has, and the way his eyes are shining, “I’m scared.”

His skin is so soft under my touch, has he always been this way? Jihoon leans into my touch as if he’s never felt anything like this, “scared of what?”

“That I’ll like you too much. That once I take a step forward, it’ll be too difficult to restrain myself again.”

Jihoon laughs, the tip of his nose touching mine, “one step forward, is okay. It’s allowed.”

“Are you quoting Crash Landing on You?” I laugh, even as his lips touch mine.

Kissing Jihoon is an experience; his skin feels soft under my touch, but his lips are insistent against mine, demanding and reverent alternatively, as though he can’t believe his luck that he’s kissing me, or that this is a dream, and what he needs to do is possess it, and then, this memory of a moment will be forever engraved in his heart. My hands go to the back of his neck, where his hair is softer than usual—has he washed it—but all I can feel, under my fingers, is how his heart beats, quicker than I’ve ever imagined it to be, and how it mirrors my own.

I don’t want this moment to end.

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quickstappen · 1 month ago

Text

track 004: the see is calm (before the storm)

A/N: i know i've disappeared for a while but it turns out that second year of college is very different to the first. now finally after two months i've got it under control so hopefully we'll have a semi-regular schedule for now, i'll try to post something every two weeks (on weekends most likely). anyway, this one's not very plot heavy but it's needed for the story, enjoy!

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liked by carlitosalcarazz, oscarpiastri and others

paola_sainz contrary to popular belief, I do actually work sometimes ;) keep your eyes open guys, things are getting done here

tagged: sean_cliff

see all comments...

F4ST_C4R oh please say its a new collection, i was too late for the 1st one and it sold out 😭

oui_lyanne who the fuck is sean

↳ 4ND1 from what i can see he's another designer

↳ oui_lyanne ooh, collab maybe? 👀

↳ f1w1tch OR the super secret boyf

L3CH41R well, looks like she's not in spa after all

mcwilliams are you gonna comment on the williams/carlos announcement??

↳ prplsector i mean,, why would she?? it's not her announcement, she's got a job

lightning_enjyr oh my god are those pieces from the new collection?? 😳

danielricciardo Respect the grind 💪🤠

↳ sadiebull sorry what is daniel ricciardo doing

↳ fastkiwi trying to relate to the youth lol

shithappens oh god women in suits 😳

STARG3N guys,,, what is carlos alcaraz doing in the likes

↳ hamilteaa the tennis player???

↳ STARG3N yeahhh

sean_cliff you know it's always a pleasure working with you 🤭

↳ paola_sainz oh I know, I am brilliant of course

↳ elmatadorf1 jesus what a self-centred bitch 💀

predestined55 no one's gonna buy this crap anyway 🐍

carlitosalcarazz We need to play again sometime! 🎾

↳ paola_sainz do your job at the Olympics first, then we'll see 👏

↳ isawthesainz THEY KNOW EACH OTHER???

↳ dutchlion sure looks like it 👀

oscarpiastri You gonna spend the whole summer break working too?

↳ paola_sainz actually no, this one guy invited me to visit his family you know

↳ oscarpiastri Lucky guy

↳ lightning_enjyr oui_lyanne surely you see my point now

↳ oui_lyanne everyday i am closer to believing you

paola's messages:

paola_sainz posted new instagram stories!

caption 1: a little pitstop before our journey ;)

caption 2: mid-rant and a little drunk but he's fine, alive and well

⟶ alex_albon replied to your story!

alex_albon oh thank god you're with him, he hasn't been answering my calls and texts

paola_sainz yeahh, we figured. me and Osc are with him rn but we have to leave in the morning

alex_albon shit, how is he really? do you seriously have to leave?

paola_sainz he's better than yesterday, mostly pissed atp but I'm sure that the self-hatered and misery will come soon

paola_sainz and yeah we have to, we've been trying to visit Oscar's family together for ages

paola_sainz I think he's going home for the rest of the break

alex_albon jesus, that's good at least

alex_albon I'll try to reach out again

paola_sainz good idea

caption 3: couldn't take this little guy home, apparently "2 is enough cats Lola"

⟶ maxverstappen1 replied to your story!

maxverstappen1 I think you should've taken him anyway, he is very cute

paola_sainz I knoww! I named him Barron Meowmilton

paola_sainz unfortunately, I do not fancy sleeping on the couch for the foreseeable future so we left Barron at a local shelter ;)

maxverstappen1 Ah, I understand

maxverstappen1 We'll always remember you, Barron Meowmilton

caption 4: and we're off to see the future in-laws ;)

⟶ hattiepiastri replied to your story!

hattiepiastri has my brother done something we don't know about??

paola_sainz nahh, dw about it, you'd be first to know after your mum

paola_sainz I'm just sure I'm gonna marry him someday, there's no other option

hattiepiastri you're both so disgustingly gone for each other it should be studied

hattiepiastri can't wait to see you though

paola_sainz girll me too, it's been too long

paola's messages:

liked by jensonbutton, hattiepiastri and others

paola_sainz can confirm that kitties are just as cute down under as in the rest of the world ;)

see all comments...

shithappens paola talking about cats at all times? fork found in kitchen

arthur_leclerc did you try to take the cat home?

↳ oscarpiastri take a wild guess mate

↳ paola_sainz don't know what you're talking about mate

↳ oscarpiastri I have a feeling that you're gonna grossly overuse mate now

↳ paola_sainz now why would I do that... mate 😇

barbiegirl what are you doing in Australia girllll

elmatadorf1 thank god she's not going home with Carlos, he doesn't need her 🐍

jensonbutton Come back in one piece please

↳ paola_sainz don't you worry about that Jense, I am well taken care of ;)

oui_lyanne yeah okay she's actually in australia

charles_leclerc You're right, that's a very cute kitty

lightning_enjyr did you buy any new records?

oscarpiastri Have you seen the sights yet?

↳ paola_sainz not really, my tour guide has been kinda busy

↳ oscarpiastri That's a shame, there's a lot of great things to see

↳ paola_sainz don't worry mate, I've been looking at different kind of sights plenty enough, lot of beach days yk? I can wait a few more days 😉

↳ oscarpiastri Oh, well in that case 🫢

prplsector oscar is brave fr, I'll give him that 😳

4ND1 god the tension is this comment section is something else

ada_moore if Oscar's not the boyfriend and I was the boyfriend I am straight up fighting that man in some dark alley because that is so flirty and for what (if he IS the boyfriend, carry on please, the energy is unmatched)

L3CH41R how are her outfits always so good???

predestined55 Carlos just signed a contract and she's talking about cats and being a slut in the comments, great 😒

hattiepiastri posted new instagram stories!

caption 1: did you know, we're killer on karaoke nights?

caption 2: doing all this late night talking

caption 3: we're keeping her oscarpiastri, if you don't wife her up I will

⟶ oscarpiastri replied to your story!

oscarpiastri You don't have to worry about that

paola_sainz posted new instagram stories!

caption 1: g'day mate! celebrity crush meet up officially checked out from my wishlist

caption 2: the locals showing me the best ice cream places in town

caption 3: hands that have never seen manual labour

⟶ oscarpiastri replied to your story!

oscarpiastri hey!

paola_sainz you're offended like it's not true

caption 4: bad bitch on the beach

liked by oscarpiastri, danielricciardo and others

paola_sainz most unexpected crossover of the year? maybe not as unexpected as you think! me and Robert did some cool things this week and I got to meet some sweet pets, I might not come back from 'Straya

see all comments...

N3CKSTRI excuse me- Robert Irwin and Paola Sainz in one place? i might actually die

prplsector spain's sweetheart with australia's sweetheart, way too cute

dutchlion can someone actually explain to me how people can hate her? if you don't like her content just stop looking at it, but actually hating on her?? can't imagine

robertirwinphotography It was good to finally see you! The animals already miss you

↳ paola_sainz oh god please don't say that, I'll cry for real 😭 I miss them too

shithappens i dunno, i still think it's pretty unexpected

fastkiwi the way this isn't even the wildest thing she's done this season 😳

predestined55 can you like rot in hell now? two faced bitch 🐍

barbiegirl they'd look sooooo goooood together

↳ zoebryne_x ik right??

logansargeant Is zookeeper next on the cv?

↳ paola_sainz you're laughing but I'd be an amazing zookeeper

↳ logansargeant Who told you that? I wouldn't trust them, you'd end up taking all the animals home

↳ paola_sainz Robert said I'd do great!

↳ logansargeant I think that's just his job, plus he's too nice to tell you the truth

↳ paola_sainz you're mean, see if I bring you gifts when I get back

4ND1 can I meet Robert Irwin now??

oscarpiastri Still looking at sights?

↳ paola_sainz why, you jealous mate?

↳ oscarpiastri Don't worry, just curious

lightning_enjyr are they even trying to hide it atp???

elmatadorf1 can she just injure sth since she's playing tennis so much? maybe then we'd get a break from her stupid face 🤢

↳ STARG3N you guys are literally insane what the hell

madi_races every time i open the comment section i get whiplash, on twt everyone is trying to figure out who the boyfriend is, the press is eating this all up, people are placing bets and here is oscar just shamelessly flirting, it's like a different universe

arthur_leclerc I'm coming with you next time

↳ paola_sainz ditch Charles and come here then

hammertime_1 guys i really don't think Oscar's the boyfriend, she's just way out of his league

isawthesainz jesus she's so cringe, excuse me while i throw up

paola's messages:

NETHERLANDS 2024

liked by charles_leclerc, logansargeant and others

oscarpiastri And we're back 👍 break at home was good but it's nice to be racing again

see all comments...

laile_f1 he's never beating the calm cat allegations

catstri81 that is the most oscar caption to ever caption

maximumformula he's doing the dad pose 😭

4ND1 i can't with him 😭 he's just a guyy

chat_withmani ohh he's posted the girlfriend!!

elmatadorf1 i can't believe he still has a seat

↳ prplsector can you guys stop being fucking petty for a minute

paola_sainz so did the girlfriend like it in the down under mate?

↳ oscarpiastri Yeah, since she's now best friends with my sister I'm pretty sure she did mate 🙄

↳ paola_sainz what, you jealous of your sister?

↳ oscarpiastri She basically stole my girlfriend

lestappen116 he looks so happy 😭

fastkiwi it was good to see you back at home

landonorris Let's go mate! Good weekend 👍

paola's messages:

click here to be added to the carved my name taglist!

taglist: @blushmimi @Ale-522 @joalslibrary @jaydaaasworld @vroomvroommuppett @sugarhoneylemons @formulaonebuff @clove0 @rockyhayzkid @glitzyditzy @coriyaps @irishmanwhore @gr3yhues @kikiki04 @fall-bambi @nichmeddar @sunfairyy @formulaal @marauders-wife @theseus-jpg @heavy-vettel @anxxiousaries @linaversion @gloriousmoneyrascalbiscuit @d3kstar @camelliaflow3r @delululeclerc @lesliiieeeee (xxx - couldn't tag you)

DISCLAIMER: i do not know anything about this people, this is not real life, this is just something for fun, i do not know anythings about their life or personalities!

#f1 #f1 smau #for fun #f1 instagram au #ferrari #formula 1 #oscar piastri smau #oscar piastri social media au #ferrari f1 #charles leclerc #carlos sainz smau #carlos sainz

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chugging-antiseptic-dye · 12 days ago

Text

Five times you hated Joshua

genre : soft angst word count : 1.3 k words > trigger warnings : profanities and slight slut-shaming (not by shua)

When he helped you up after you tripped in front of him like a goddamn idiot

What happened half an hour ago was the thing you have been dreading since you and Joshua broke up. You even went to church on a Sunday with your mother and begged God to let you keep your dignity for once and NOT make a fool of yourself in front of Joshua. And did you do exactly one week later? Be the biggest, most pathetic loser in this whole city, nay, the universe! Maybe it wasn't a big deal. Lots of people make eye contact with their ex who they have been ghosting, and then stub their toe in the sidewalk, let out a scream a pterodactyl would be proud of, and fall face first into the snow. Joshua running over to help you up was the nail on the coffin. You hated him so much.

Why couldn't he have left you alone when you were hurt?

When he lied to your mom that you were still together

"Why didn't you tell me the reason Joshua couldn't come to family dinner was because he is busy on an important work project? A project that could even net him a promotion??" As usual, your mother screeched as soon as the call connected.

Blindsided by it all, you replied in the most intelligent way you could,

"Huh?”

"And here I thought he finally had enough of you and broke up. I mean no would blame him. Look at who Joshua is and look at yourself. Goodness!”

"Um, yeah, sorry, he was just busy.”

Your brain volleyed off your mom's interrogation on autopilot because the only thing your mind could loop was how much you loathed Joshua.

Why did he still have to be your partner in crime?

When he helped you feed stray cats even when he doesn't like pets.

Enough time has passed since your breakup that you felt that it was safe enough to pass through your old neighbourhood yours and Joshua's home. Making a slight detour to check up on the two stray cats you used to take care of, you push down the feelings of guilt that bubble up. You keep telling yourself that they are okay. They are stray cats. They will be fine without you feeding them premium grade tuna. But, you are still apprehensive of what you are going to find. Suddenly, you see a silhouette dropping something on where the cats frequently gather. Recognizing it's Joshua, you dash into deep dive into the adjacent alley. Your eyes widen in disbelief as you recognize the can Joshua poured something out of. Making sure to stay still until he leaves, you creep slower when the area is deserted again. You saw right. It was the type of tuna you always fed the strays with. It took you a whole minute to wrap your head around the fact that Joshua kept on feeding your the cats. The same Joshua who grumbled that they will follow you home if you keep on feeding them. The same Joshua who passive aggressivly attached the pet policy notice on the fridge with magnets. That Joshua? You can't even stand seeing a single strand of his hair at this moment.

Why did he break his own rules for you?

When he doesn't let anyone disrespect you behind your back

You didn't mean to hear it. However, it seemed that the universe decided that you were its new punching bag and thus, the moment you hit behind the curtains to take a breather (cough hide from Joshua cough) , an annoying, grating voice piped up,

"Hey, Josh!"

Your first thought was, who the fuck is Josh and your second thought was, oh no (you could f e e l the universe smugly saying, oh yes)

"Hey, man! Long time no see. What's up?" A very, very familiar voice replied.

"It's all good. Just peachy. You here alone? I swear, I thought I saw that girl of yours."

You swear that you could feel the. heat radiating off a body just a few centimetres in front of you in the pitch-black darkness . And the voice responding confirmed that you were not being delusional.

"Um. Maybe she is here. I don't know actually. We sort of broke up." Joshua replied awkwardly.

"Oh damn. It's all right, bro. There are plenty of fish in the sea and all that. I always thought she was a bit of a bitch anyway. Acting like she is so above us while dressing so slutty."

Pin drop silent lasted for a few seconds and then, with steel in his voice that you didn't know he possessed, Joshua spit out,

"I think you got the wrong idea here, pal. She broke up with me and not the other way around. And even if I broke up with her, it would not be because of any fault of hers. She is an amazing person inside out."

That piping voice finally got a hint (who even was this idiot) and squeaked a bit in fear.

"Wow, sorry, man. I didn't know that you guys were still together. I totally respect your territory and all that."

"You don't have to respect my 'territory' at all. But never disrespect her in front of me again."

"Yeah, whatever, bye."

Both of you could hear the idiot mutter as he walked away, "What crawled up his ass today?"

Letting out a deep sigh, Joshua also walked away. And you hated him a bit more.

Why couldn't he let you face the world alone?

When he is always in your corner even when you are not

It was a dull Monday evening like any other. The only thing that was exciting in your life was that you were two pages away from finishing the book you were slogging through the last eight months. Just as you turn to the second last page, a small slip of paper starts to float down from the book. Now, curious, you pick it up only to read the words,

"Almost at the end! I always knew you could do it, sweetheart <3 - Your Joshua."

A high-pitched kneeing wail slipped out of your throat and you fell down to your knees. Why, why, why, why, why, why, why. Why did he have to be so supportive? You never hated someone as much as you hated him.

Why did he always have faith in you?

+ The one time you accepted that you will always love him

You were so used to taking the same route every day that it was something you could do with your eyes closed. Suddenly a shrill ring of the phone broke the sacred silence of the subway. Ugh, who doesn't even know to silence their phones before getting on here? You think before recognising that it was your phone that was ringing. In a panic-filled scramble, you accept the phone call and whisper,

"Hello?"

"Wow, I didn't think you would pick up." Joshua said with a tired chuckle.

"Um, well, I did. Is it something important you wanted to tell me? I am actually on the subway. I will call you back later?"

"No! It's fine. There's no need to call back." With a click, the call ended. You turn the short conversation over in your mind. Only one thing stood out. Joshua's voice was even but there seemed to be something he was holding back.

Making a sudden split decision, you elbow your way through the crowd and managed to get on the platform just one second before the subway pulled away. Giving yourself a second to catch your breathe, you make your way towards Joshua's house. It's not something an ex-girlfriend should do but Joshua was so bad at asking for help and you couldn't bear the thought of him experiencing any kind of pain.

It's okay, you guys were bad at being exes anyways.

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aclassitag · 8 months ago

Text

Announcing Krem Week!

#kremweek2024 — 22-28 July 2024

background art credit: @xfreischutz [link to original post]

*text prompt list under the readmore

This year will mark 10 years since the release of Dragon Age: Inquisition! In celebration of that anniversary and the game that gave us our first trans character, here is a prompt list - and dates - for any who would like to participate! All sorts of creative content is accepted so long as they are not A/I generated. (See examples below)

*If you want to portray Maevaris Tilani instead, that is also fine!

Please read the guidelines!

If you have any questions, reply to this post and I will do my best to answer :)

Prompt list:

1 — Anniversary 2 — Euphoria / Expression 3 — Casual / Formal 4 — Family / Love 5 — Respite / Fight 6 — Play / Satiate 7 — (Free space!)

Guidelines:

Use the tag: #kremweek2024 (@ this blog is fine too) — If you want to portray Maevaris Tilani instead of Krem, that is also welcome! Please @ me so I can rb :) For non-Tumblr folks that somehow got here: You may post submissions, please link your socials. You may choose one of two prompts in a day or do both. You may also combine as many prompts as you want from any or all of the days into a single work, just mention it somewhere.

Types of content allowed:

Illustration and writing are the most obvious forms of art allowed, but they're not the only ones! Literary arts fanfics, drabbles, poetry, plays, lengthy headcanon/meta posts (for headcanon and meta posts, minimum of 100 words+) Visual arts doodles, paintings, graphic design, photoshop memes, photography, animation, tiktok skits, abstract, fiber arts (embroidery, knitting, etc), ceramics Audio art fanmixes(curated playlists), original or cover songs Other crafts are also welcome! e.g. culinary, resin, woodworking, etc etc ..essentially, whatever type of art it is, I'll accept it so long as it falls within rules and is related to Krem or Maevaris :) For things that are more abstract, do include an explanation of your thought process on how it relates to Krem. E.g. you made Krem's Seheron Fish Wrap or Rice Pudding, take photos of your cooking, and post that (with the explanation that it is Krem's recipes) - that's an acceptable submission! You're allowed to explore different mediums everyday! You don't have to stick to one form of art for the whole week. I will be attempting to schedule reblogs in the 'prime time' for engagement, and in the interest of fairness, things like headcanon posts, fanmixes, and WIPs will not take priority in that time slot over fully rendered illustrations or complete fanfics. They will still be reblogged, but scheduled for other time slots.

Content Rules:

No A/I generated content. (Specifically GenAI content) As above, any and all forms of art is welcome. It must be human made, and by you. The whole point of working off a prompt is to explore a creative process, anyway - do yourself a favour and just enjoy making something! It doesn't have to be pretty! No reposting of other people's works. This must be your own creation. Obviously, no transphobic content. No harrassing others over their specific headcanons - be it in regards to any trait or quirks that come with being a person. People come in all sorts of wonderful variety, please respect that. In addition to above: No whitewashing, racism etc. Please note that Krem is not pale-skinned in canon, and I will not be reblogging content of him being portrayed as pale. 18+ works need to be labelled. On this blog, its tagged as "#adult art". Please add content warnings as appropriate. (E.g. portrayal of binding with bandages should have a warning label of "cw: unsafe binding", etc.) If your post/submission is lengthy, please insert a read more. This helps readability on the dashboard. Progress / WIPs are fine too!

General tips:

First and foremost, do what you are able to! Don't feel pressured to complete a full week if you need to take care of yourself first. Some people work on the prompts before the week even begins, and only post it day of. You are not required to do this, but if you really want to fill something for each day, this helps reduce stress day of.

Mod things:

The mod isn't from the Americas, so due to timezone differences, there may be a delay in reblogging people's works. Either way I will not reblog the moment that it's posted in order to screen properly. Posts will be queued between 30mins-1hr apart, if there are multiple entries being submitted at the same time. All submissions will also be requeued after a week for later perusal :)

#cremisius aclassi #kremweek2024 #dragon age #dragon age inquisition #bull's chargers #iron bull #also i am. running out of krem posts. help #krem aclassi #krem

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callmelola111 · 2 years ago

Text

guilty conscience ☆ part three

← part 1 , part 2 ⭑ part 4 , part 5 →

synopsis: it’s your first year at college and you’re 1,500 miles away from home. you’d feel completely alone if it wasn't for your attractive roommate ellie. will this attraction complicate the already uncharted territory? or will she be the answer to all your problems?

|✯| pairing & wc: college!ellie williams x roommate!reader. wc: 2.7k

|✯| cw (by part): 18+ themes (MDNI), fem reader, modern au!ellie, HEAVY ANGST, some swearing, heavy on sexual themes, cat lol, reader throws up, drinking, smoking, ellie acting like a piece of shit, almost kinda cheating

a/n: lots of character development in this part. looking forward to the next one though cause it will be getting sick, twisted, and hot. yes everyone, its true, expect some smut!!!! anyways hope you like all this crazy angst. thanks for all the support on previous parts, it means so much to me fr ♡

That night you went home early, never seeing Ellie’s band play. You don’t even have the energy to take off the makeup you had done special for that evening. You quickly changed to your pajamas, then slipped right into bed, all while maintaining a steady flow of tears.

You attempted to go to sleep, in fact, that’s all you really wanted to do. You didn’t want to feel the hurt of Ellie anymore. Unfortunately, sleep wasn’t in your near future. The night continued to play on a loop in your mind driving you insane. You questioned why you ever thought she would feel the same way about you as you did her. You felt stupid.

Ellie arrived home later that night. Not ready to face her just yet, you turned towards the wall and pretended to sleep. She would’ve fell for it too, but the hitch in your breath as you tried to swallow your sobs gave you away.

“Hey… uh, are you alright?” she gently inquired. Ellie was perplexed, still not understanding why you had stormed out on her and never came back. Has she done something to you? Or maybe you were jealous of Cat? She wanted to hear you say the words.

“If you think I’m crying over you, I-I’m not. I’m fine.” you finally muttered, putting all your defenses up. You felt embarrassed for feeling so strongly about her. This answer broke Ellie’s heart and she wasn’t quite sure why. She wished you would’ve stayed for her show, it was important, but it seemed like you could care less how your actions affected her. You humbled her in the worst way possible and it made her, in a way, resentful. Resentful enough that she wouldn’t open her eyes to the obvious fact that the two of you were more than just roommates.

Ellie responded, impulsive and pissed off, “Well fine, I’m glad. I- I really like Cat, and I don’t need you screwing this up for me.”

“Me??? Mess it up for you??? Don’t worry Ellie, you can do that all on your own, believe me.” You cringed hearing yourself be so cruel to the girl you love. You didn’t mean it.

That night neither of you slept and it was like that for the rest of the week. You hung around Dina as much as you could to avoid Ellie's presence. Being around her was like torture. Even more like torture was the fact that you were keeping it all a secret from Dina. You felt like a fool for getting into such a stupid situation. You’d just get embarrassed and start tearing up if you tried to tell her. But that didn’t stop Dina from asking. The other day, the two of you were hanging out and she brought up Cat, or as she liked to call her “the cunt from class”, never bothering to learn her real name.

“What ever happened with that cunt from class being at Ellie’s show the other night?”

“Oh Cat? Yeah, I guess she just happened to see a flyer and showed up. I don’t really know.” you replied trying not to sound too suspicious.

“Cat? You guys are on a first name basis now?” She chuckled, noticing your sudden unusual behavior, and questioning how you knew her name. You laughed along with her trying to play it off. Dina didn’t wanna pry though, she knew you’d tell her when you were ready. You loved how patient she was with you. You never had those kinds of friends back home. Dina saw your eyes soften as you admired the friendship the two of you shared.

“What?” she teased.

“I just love you Dina, that's all.” you said matter-of-factly and leaned in for a big embrace. She grabbed the sides of your face and leaned in to plant a kiss on the top of your head. Whatever was going on, she knew you needed the love.

“Love you too y/n.” she smiled back at you.

Taking advantage of the tender moment Dina mentioned, “by the way, there’s this party happening Friday and I think we should go.”

“I don’t know about a party…” you said reluctantly. You had been so down lately that you didn’t feel like partying, but that’s exactly why Dina insisted you go.

“Pleaseeee Y/n!!! A party would do you some good, You’ve been such a sad sack lately.” She was practically begging, so you gave up and agreed to go.

Meanwhile Ellie was being dragged around by Cat. It’s not that Cat was all bad news. There were some times where Ellie really liked hanging around her but it was mostly when the two of them were alone. Anytime other people came around, Cat’s attitude shifted and she became defensive and insecure. It’s like the presence of others presented this possibility that she could be abandoned by Ellie. Everyone felt like a threat.

Ellie disliked that side of her, but she could also sympathize. She knew what it felt like to be rejected and forgotten about, I mean, you were doing that to her right now. You were barely around anymore, always with that Dina girl. Maybe that was the real reason Ellie kept Cat around;

She knew she would never leave her. And if one day she did, deep down, Ellie knew she wouldn’t really care. Not like how she cares about you.

On Friday you headed over to Dina’s place and the two of you got ready for the party together. Dina did your makeup for you, she even put glitter under your eyes for a special touch.

“You look so hot bro. The sparkles are adorable, you’re like a little fairy” Dina exclaimed, proud of her work. You looked in the mirror and smiled. You haven't felt this good in a while. Once you guys arrived at the party you went straight to the backyard of the frathouse to smoke. No way you’d be here sober.

You lit the end of the pink joint and said, “I hate to admit it but… I think you were right D. I really did need this.” You took a hit and then passed it over to her.

“What? The joint? Or some quality time with your best friend?” she teased.

“Honestly, both.” The two of you burst into laughter at your blunt response, beginning to feel the high. Even after you finished smoking, you remained outside sitting on the steps. You had gotten so wrapped into conversation with each other that you almost forgot you were at a party. With the sudden realization you were still outside and the sound of Come Get Her playing on the speakers inside, you and Dina finally decided to get up and party.

That is, until Dina gets a call from her sister and has to step aside. You wait for her, leaning on the doorframe. As she talks there’s a serious look on her face. She finally finishes her conversation and looks to you to break the news.

“Y/n I’m really sorry, but I’ve gotta go. A family emergency came up and I gotta go help out my sister like right now.” You could tell by her tone that it was urgent and she genuinely felt bad for having to ditch you.

She continued, “but you, please stay. I think I just saw Ellie inside and I’m sure she’d be happy to party with you.” Not wanting to reveal your current situation with Ellie, you went along with it. You know Dina was only trying to help.

“Don't even worry about it D. I completely get it, family first. I love you.” you replied, bringing her in for a hug.

“Okay good, thank you for understanding babe. Byeee.” And with that, Dina was gone, and you were left to face this party alone. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was really Ellie that Dina had seen, or if she was just a little too high. Ellie didn’t seem like the frat party type, but honestly, neither did you. Even though you weren’t necessarily on speaking terms with her, you decided to go inside and look anyway.

That’s when you spot her with none other than Cat the cunt. She was hanging all over Ellie, it was almost gross. The sight left you sick and you straight-lined it to the alcohol to take a couple shots. Those couple of shots led to a couple more, and then a couple more as you watched Ellie and Cat practically suck each other’s faces off. You couldn’t stop staring though, it was almost sadistic.

Busy chaperoning the obnoxious couple, you managed to lose track of the amount of alcohol you were consuming. The nausea hit you like a truck and you stumbled to a dirty couch trying to deep breath through the churning of your stomach. A familiar voice interrupts your attempt at self-soothing.

“Y/n?” You look up at the sound of your name coming from your favorite person's mouth. As you opened yours to greet her, all that came out were chunks. Ellie jumped back, just missing the splash zone. Your throw up now soaked the frat house couch and the floor surrounding. And in front of Ellie? How embarrassing. While you were busy cursing yourself in your head for making such a scene, Ellie was cursing herself for not finding you sooner.

The idea of you drunk and all alone at a frat party scared her, and she was your protector. With that scenario flashing through her mind she scooped you into her arms and rushed you to the bathroom. The whole world was spinning as Ellie plopped you onto the floor in front of the toilet. She held back your hair and rubbed your back as you continued to vomit. You were already beginning to sober up as your body rid you of the intoxicating liquid. Ellie pushed at your baby hairs and wiped at the sweat collecting on your temples from the heaving. Despite everything, Ellie really did care for you. She couldn’t stand to see you in pain. And she couldn’t stand the thought of someone hurting you either.

“Come back to my bandmates with me. Please?” Ellie finally spoke.

Feeling the nausea dissipate, you responded, “thanks for your help but I think I’ll be fine just walking back to the dorm.”

“A drunk girl walking 20 minutes across campus, in the dark, alone??? That’s like the stupidest idea you’ve ever had.” Ellie hated how stubborn you were.

“I’m not even that drunk anymore,” you paused for a beat, “but fine. I’ll go with you.” Ellie sighed in relief. She put you under her arm and started leading you to the door. She was so warm and you felt so safe. As she walks outside, Ellie spots Cat and knows she’s in trouble. Ellie gently sits you down on the curb so she can go deal.

“Els, what the fuck is she doing here?” Cat spits as soon as Ellie is in listening distance.

“Listen Cat, I don’t know, but she’s really messed up and I can’t just leave her here.”

Cat raises her voice, louder this time, “what do you mean?? Are you really picking her over me?”

“I didn’t know I had to pick. Shes my fucking friend Cat.”

“But- but… I’m your girlfriend” she says, voice trembling with insecurity.

Ellie turns to leave the exhausted conversation, “it doesn’t work like that. I- I’ve gotta go now, we’ll talk about this later. I'm sorry.”

The next thing you know you’re sitting in a strangers kitchen and Ellie is force feeding you crackers and water, trying to sober you up. Just being there with her is already making you feel so much better. You talk and giggle through the night like you guys had never even fought. A sleeve of Saltines, 3 glasses of water, and 2 Advil later you’re beginning to feel a little more like your normal self.

This doesn’t stop Ellie from coddling you like a little baby for the rest of the night. She took off your makeup for you and even let you borrow the extra T-shirt she had brought in her backpack. You slipped into the bathroom to change into your makeshift pajamas. You stared back at your reflection in the mirror and couldn’t help but smile seeing yourself in nothing but Ellie’s baggy shirt. It was just like in your dreams; except now you were in her clothes for a different reason, not because you guys just finished having mind blowing sex. How unfortunate. You went back out into the living room and stood in front of Ellie.

“So uh, where should I sleep?” you asked with an awkward smile. Your shoulders shrunk in and you fidgeted with your charm bracelet as you waited for a response. The silence continued to drag out because Ellie was too busy imagining her own fantasies. Her heart fluttered as you stood there all coy in her shirt. She pictured you in the same exact outfit making pancakes for the both of you in the kitchen of your shared apartment. She imagined sneaking up behind you to feel your figure through the baggy clothes. She’d plant kisses all over your neck until you would finally turn around from your cooking to give her a real ki-

“Ellie..?”

Your words managed to drag her out of the fake scenario, “shit yeah um. This is a pull out couch so we can set you up there.” Ellie gestured to the couch in the middle of the room and then got up to pull it out. She fixed it up with sheets and a pillow provided by her generous bandmate who was in her bedroom just down the hall. You climbed into the covers and sat as you waited for Ellie to join you. Instead she set up on the floor next to you.

Confused with her behavior you stated, “you can sleep up here with me. You know that right?”

“I guess I kinda thought you wouldn’t want me to.” Ellie confessed, tilting her head down in shame.

“Of course I want you to Els.” She missed hearing you call her that, how could she refuse? Ellie climbed right into bed and there was an immediate increase in tension. The thought of you right beside her with just a shirt and panties drove Ellie wild. She felt like such a piece of shit for even thinking like that, but part of her wondered if you also felt the rising tension. You both lay on your sides, backs facing each other, when you finally disturb the loud silence.

“I missed you.”

“What do you mean? We live together.” Ellie wasn’t stupid though.

“You know what I mean Els.” you answered, voice breaking slightly. Ellie felt so guilty knowing that a lot of this mess was her own fault. She then shifted to face your back and tugged your hips into the space between her thighs and torso.

“I missed you too…” Ellie said against your neck, sending chills down your spine. Her arm reached past your waist and raised your T-shirt right below the start of your breasts. She took that same tattooed arm and wrapped it around your now bare tummy, pulling you in even closer. Her touch made you gasp.

Ellie was a pretty skinny girl but she was strong, you could see it in her arms, the way they flexed when she played guitar or lifted something. But, when you visualized her touch, you had never imagined it being this soft. You practically melted feeling her skin brush against yours. An ache was radiating between your legs as you clenched your thighs together in agony. You wanted her hands in places other than your plush stomach. Ellie did too, but you were coming down from being completely wasted, and she was still with Cat. It just wasn’t right.

The rest of the night you remained in the same position in fear of losing each other’s touch, but aware that nothing more would happen. Then, that morning, you woke to no touch. Ellie was already gone, and your heart broke all over again. Her guilt had taken over after Cat sent a string of texts expressing her insecurity in the relationship. She explained to Ellie that she didn’t feel loved or important because of her favoring towards you. And Cat was right, Ellie did favor you. She was trying so hard to be “good” and ignore her feelings, trying not to be a cheater, but she was hurting you (the one she truly loves) in the process. Why couldn’t she just let go of Cat? Would you ever experience a night like that with her again?

← masterlist ⭑ part 4 →

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@gold-dustwomxn @robinismywifee @kitty356sworld

(P.S: for future reference, if you'd like to be tagged in the next part plz make sure you have your age visible somewhere on your profile. my blog and writing contains 18+ content and minors should not be anywhere near it. obviously there's only so much i can do but checking accounts who interact is the one thing in my control so yeah. much love-- lola ♡

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jasmineoolongtea · 6 months ago

Note

Hiii i hope u're doing good and i have a req pls? Could you do smth like gojo just hanging out with student reader like father and kid? Just one random day (or some other scenario) gojo just yoinks reader and goes 'let's do something together' thxxxx :D

a/n: hiii anon, hope you're doing good as well !!! of course i can do your request so hope you enjoy this short drabble (＾▽＾) also sorry it took a while for me to get back to you since i've been away from my computer for the past few days :((

to say that gojo satoru is an eccentric teacher might possibly be one of the biggest understatements of the century. even if you were to put it nicely,

it's been a few days since you've stepped foot into the classroom on account of being put out of commission for a bit after a particularly nasty encounter with a semi-grade 2 curse on what was supposed to be a relatively easy mission. it would have been nice if the higher-ups could have mentioned that the curse had a tendency to travel in packs of 3 or 4 but in the world of jujutsu, you knew that's already expecting too much of them.

the first sight you're greeted with is your teacher, the strongest himself gojo satoru, leaning back in his desk chair with his feet up on the desk as if he had little to no care about anything in the world. if the higher-ups were to walk past and see this, they would definitely screech at the top of their lungs and die from shock or maybe it would finally be their bodies finally giving up on them in old age. you don't think you would be that sad to see them go.

"nice of you to finally show up to class. even if it's on the wrong day." your teacher huffs from his seat. there's a slight sting at his words but you choose to grit your teeth instead of replying.

albeit, you don't necessarily blame your teacher for his off-handed comment because, from his and everyone else's point of view, it just seemed like you were simply just taking the chance to play hooky and skip a few classes here and there even if it was far from the truth.

you made shoko promise not to say anything to anyone when she was patching you up, even if she gave you one of those looks that silently asked you if you really wanted that. it wasn't a matter of pride per say because having your classmates know that you got ganged up on by a couple of curses was honestly the least of your problems.

rather, it was because you didn't want to bother anyone more than you had to or even worse, be on the end of some surface-level sympathy from some people who could care less if you lived or died. to you, this was simply how the jujutsu world worked so what point was there sitting around and lingering on all of its problems when it would do you no good?

"...i've had a rough week. can i just get the work that i've missed out on and i'll be out of your hair." you mutter while avoiding eye contact with the taller man, deciding that all of a sudden the wooden panels of the floor were more interesting.

there's an instant switch in his relaxed demeanour as his voice is laced with strong hints of concern when he asks, "you wanna talk about it?"

you open your mouth to speak, to make a half-hearted attempt to brush off his concern and maybe even throw in a snarky quip to really cement the act that everything was fine but for some reason, you decide against that and so you end up saying nothing back in response.

it's quiet for a minute, the both of you unmoving, before your teacher suddenly stands up from his seat and strides towards you which takes you by surprise.

"alright, new plan then." gojo claps his hands, the sound reverberating slightly off the classroom walls as his typical attitude makes a return. "me and you are going on, let's call it, a class trip to the arcade!"

you roll your eyes, arms still crossed over your chest as you look at him, unamused. "i'm pretty sure that this isn't part of the class curriculum."

"when have i ever been a stickler for the rules, kid?" and without further ado (and a seeming shortage of verbal complaints from your side), you find yourself whisked off to a nearby arcade and being ushered into the doors of said establishment by your teacher.

so much for your original plan of retreating back to hide under your blanket for the rest of the day, you think to yourself.

as you step inside, memories of after-school hangouts with megumi, nobara and yuji as you guys make it your mission to burn through your monthly allowances on the various games and machines flood your mind and you can't help but smile whilst reminiscing, though it fades quickly when you realise that it feels like forever since any of you guys have had the chance to relax with each other like this considering how time has become more and more scarce and more like a luxury that one had to earn rather than anything else.

there's the sound of coin swishing around in a bucket coming from your right and when you turn to face the sound, you see your teacher making his way towards you hugging a comically large amount of coins in an insanely large bucket in his arms. if it were any bigger, you might have been obligated to call it a chest instead of a bucket. you do a double-take at the sight in front of you.

"are you planning to buy out the whole arcade with those coins?" you remark, a bewildered expression clearly painted on your face as you try to calculate in your head the amount of money he must have spent on that stash.

he looks down at the bucket of coins in his arms which were almost on the verge of overflowing and shrugs. "eh, this is nothing." he replies with an air of nonchalance.

you're ready to contest that statement of his but then you remember gojo satoru, aside from being a teacher with interesting teaching methods, to say the least, is also one of the richest sorcerers in the entire country of japan as well so whatever he did spend on those arcade tokens is probably nothing more than a drop in the vast ocean that is his bank account.

in the blink of an eye, gojo sprints off to the brightest and flashiest machine in the arcade and you can't help but question if he might be a child trapped in the body of an adult. begrudgingly, you trail behind him and watch as he slots in the appropriate amounts of tokens and boots up the game. while waiting, he starts absent-mindedly button-mashing the controls in a vain attempt to make it load faster.

you sigh to yourself as you watch from over his shoulder. "is this day more for me or you?" you ask, your eyes still trained on the screen in front of you. "because from what i'm seeing, it looks like you're enjoying this waay more than me."

gojo laughs softly to himself, not even pausing the game before turning to you with a smirk on his lips. "that's because you're spending more time complaining rather than having fun."

to be fair, you couldn't really argue with that so you quietly concede (though very unwillingly) to him as you take an unoccupied chair from another game booth and return to where he was playing. before you know it, you find yourself deeply immersed in the game as well and you start reacting to his gameplay like cheering when he makes it past a level or groaning in frustration when there's a roadblock standing in his way.

for a split second, you notice that there's a faraway look in his eyes which looks eerily similar to the one you probably had when you stepped into the arcade and began to think about happier times but before you can even spit out a question, it's gone and you're left wondering if it was nothing more than just a trick of the light.

the game is over quickly soon enough when the words 'you win' begin flashing in white on the screen with gojo's high score written underneath the text. you then scramble to take his place in the seat when he stands up to stretch, very much intent on beating his score and a competitive glint in your eyes as you stare at the machine with laser focus. behind you, he smiles to himself and watches on proudly, letting out a cheer that's probably too loud and earns you two a few weird stares from the other passersby whenever you progress on to the next level.

the rest of the afternoon flies by like this as you and gojo constantly bounce from one game to another, challenging and throwing some light-hearted taunts at each other as you attempt to beat the other's score. this does rapidly deplete his coin stash but by the time you're down to the bottom of the bucket, you two have already beaten all of the available games in the arcade with some of them being beaten more than twice as well.

gojo takes the bucket from your hands and heads over to the counter to exchange the remaining ones for money before returning to you and pointing to the door, signalling that it's time to head back. you do a quick look back at the place behind you, feeling much lighter inside than compared to when you entered, and walk out with your teacher

while walking down the street, you feel a nudge against your shoulder and turn to face him. he gestures towards a small pastel stand on the side of the both of you. "hey, check out that crepe stand over there. they have some of the best ice cream crepes in the area." your teacher states.

you look at him, unconvinced. "i'm not sure i can really trust your taste buds considering how much sugar you consume on a daily basis."

"come oon, i'll even pay for yours if you get one." he offers, a bit too eager as he tries and fails to hide his own craving for it. you feel the corner of your lips curl upwards slightly and it seems that your stomach agrees with him as it growls quietly in an attempt to signal its hunger.

"well if you were paying, why didn't you say that earlier."

you order the first thing on their must-try section since it was your first time there, which appears to be a vanilla ice cream crepe with cherries and whipped cream, and gojo decides to go with a custom order of a matcha-flavoured crepe base, three scoops of strawberry ice cream piled on top of each other, a mountain of whipped cream with fresh strawberries placed inside but not forgetting the finishing touch of matcha powder sprinkled on top.

you would feel bad for the poor employee tasked with creating that monstrosity when they give him a knowing look, implying that this was not their first time dealing with him and his strange orders. you wait for a bit before receiving your order with him having to try extra hard to make sure nothing would slip off his order and find a seat on a nearby bench.

you two sit in silence, side by side, and eat your crepes, taking this as a chance to unwind. as you take your first bite, the soft cream simply melts in your mouth and the crepe is just the right amount of sweetness with the cherries giving you a good burst of flavour and you secretly commend your teacher for his recommendation.

taking another bite of your crepe, you look at the sky and admire the way the clouds drift lazily across the blue canvas behind them. "hey, thanks for this gojo sensei. it's been a while since i've been able to...relax." you admit, an element of vulnerability hiding behind your words.

he turns and looks at you with a soft smile. "anytime, kid."

#dividers by cafekitsune #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen drabbles #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk headcanons #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jjk fluff #gojo x reader #gojo x you #satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #*ੈ✩‧₊🍵 asks #‧₊˚ ⋅ 🍵 writes

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klausysworld · 2 years ago

Note

Hi, if it isn’t too much to ask can you do a continuation of “You were with Cami” and/or “A life i do not deserve”? I just wanna see Miss Reader living her best life & Klaus groveling (maybe she takes him back maybe she doesn’t the important part is that she’s happy) (and hey if Klaus suffers that’s a bonus) it’s fine if you can’t! Please and thank you!

You were with cami pt 2

pt 1

(third person)

Klaus woke with a tight grip on a pillow instead of his lover. His head shot up as the memories from last night rushed to his head. He scrambled to sit up when he realised that y/n was gone from his hold. He looked to the clock to see it was only 4:30am, quickly he began searching the house, nearly ripping each door off the hinges as he yelled her name. Soon enough Elijah was in the room

“she’s not here! Where is she!?” Klaus was close to hysterical as his arms flew around the air, the entire room looked like a hurricane had come over it and Elijah had nothing but pity on his face

“last night… she mentioned that she would be gone before any of were to wake… we assumed it to be an empty, drunken threat but it would seem she was quite serious” Klaus’s rage grew as he watched his brother step back cautiously

“you knew she would leave? and none of you thought to tell me!? Rebekah! Kol!” All siblings stood apprehensively as he let out a laugh, the kind of laugh that signals something bad, a manic sort of laugh.

“Niklaus, perhaps some space is what she needs…she’ll return when she’s ready” that resulted in a table nearly hitting Elijah and Kol to run out of the room

“Jesus christ, What is wrong with you!? This is not our fault! You’re the one who had to go and Flirt your way around the town just because you’re so far up your own arse! I mean come on Klaus what did you think would happen? She’d come running to you with open arms?” Rebekah was getting right in his face, both she and Elijah expected him to scream, shove her, dagger her. But instead he remained silent for a moment before large uncontrolled tears began slipping down his face, confusion and panic washed over Rebekah as she hesitantly pat his shoulder in a sense of comfort, she was even more taken aback when he pulled in her for a hug, fully sobbing as she patted his back. Elijah made his way to put a hand on his brothers arm

“she’ll come back, she loves you” he whispered while looking into his heartbroken eyes. Niklaus shook his head rapidly against Rebekah’s shoulder

“she’s gonna hate me forever, i hurt her so bad” He chocked and Rebekah felt tears of her own sting at her eyes, she couldn’t help but feel her brothers pain, she understood the feeling of loosing someone you love.

They remained stood their quietly comforting Klaus until a phone rang, Klaus’s phone. He practically launched himself at it, only to be immensely disappointed when he saw if was Camille calling.

“what” was his response as he picked it up

“Klaus? Hey i need you to come to my apartment, i have something that you’ll want to see” her tone was seductive and it made him wince

“Camille i don’t want to see you ever again, don’t call” he replied simply and blocked her number. He handed his phone to Elijah before wiping his eyes and taking a deep breath with a roll of his shoulders

“i’m going out to find the love of my life, could you please compel someone to clean up the mess i made and can at least one of your stay here incase she returns. And can you keep my phone… i don’t think she’ll want to talk to me over the phone, its best i don’t call her” he then rushed out of the house, still in his clothes from yesterday, looking exhausted with his puffy, red eyes, pinker than usual nose from sniffling and his hair a state.

Klaus searched for her for weeks. Each time a witch sent him somewhere she was moving somewhere else. Your scent still faintly in the air as he sat in the apartment you had been staying in. Sometimes he managed to make it to the hotels she had been resting at before they had been cleaned, one time he went as far to turn into his wolf form and try to track her.

Each time he saw someone who looked just a tiny bit like her he practically chased the girl until realising it wasn’t her.

A few months later, he was still searching. He was mess, that much was obvious to anyone that saw him. The days he wasn’t looking for her, he was nearly passed out drunk, his art room remained trashed, Elijah realised that each time he had it cleaned it would only end up ruined a few days later anyways so he left it be. Y/n was the only thing that he would paint, draw, the only thing he though of, dreamt of. He needed her back. One night Klaus had been both drunk and high, the next day he woke locked inside a shopping centre with an extremely expensive engagement ring in his hand and apparently he’d left y/n 47 missed calls. But the thing that made him most angry at himself was that it said that she had picked up, there was a 19 minute call and he couldn’t remember any of it, but something in that call made him buy a ring. He knew that he had to find you or he would go completely mad.

———————————————————————

(first person)

It had left the Mikaelsons nearly 8 months ago. Since the i have traveled pretty much everywhere, one time Klaus had promised he would take me around the world but it turned out that he was always too busy, whether it be a different war he was the target of or a therapist that he was attached to.

i was very aware that he was looking for me, if not from him turning up wherever i was then because he told me himself. After ignoring or declining nearly 50 calls from him in one night i decided i may aswell hear him out.

“y/n?” he mumbled

“yeah…it’s me” i whispered, i heard a load of rustling before he spoke again

“i miss you so so much, can i come see you please?” his words were slurred and sluggish, he must’ve been past drunk.

“klaus…have you been drinking?” i heard him sigh and sniff lightly

“a little bit yeah” he whispered, suddenly a loud crowd of people must’ve walked past as i could hear loud muffled yelling

“sorry, i think i’m by a pub” he muttered once they were gone

“you think?” i asked slightly worried

“um..yea i am, i think i’m in um Australia maybe? I don’t know but it’s really hot out here and its like 5 AM, you aren’t here, you were supposed to be here” he was crying, my heart ached as he sobbed down the phone, whether he broke my heart or not, i still loved him and hearing his pain hurt me too.

“Klaus i think you need to get inside, the sun will be up soon, i don’t want you to throw up from the heat and alcohol okay?”

“i wonder if my skin would still burn… did you know i’m a vampire and a werewolf? i heal like so fast, i can run fast too, i’ve been like this for so long” i laughed inwardly to myself as he rambled about his abilities as though it were brand new information

“do you enjoy being like this?” i asked, when he stayed silent for a few minutes i called him name

“i don’t know… sometimes maybe, but right now i just want to be human, i wish i could just live with you in a normal house, with our own little family. We would have a girl and a boy and we would all sit together as a family… we would be so happy, we’d visit my siblings maybe once a month and at holidays like christmas, we could celebrate christmas like regular people, no fear, just happiness and celebrate” some of his words were unclear as he cried and his voice cracked

“Niklaus…” i tried but he kept going

“do you remember when we spoke of Elena? there’s a cure, she has it, for vampirism and maybe i could have it and we can move away to somewhere quiet and secluded, i can keep us safe and i’ll give you babies, you want babies don’t you? we can be a family? we could get married and our daughter could be the flower girl and our son could hold the rings…” i cried silently while imagining the scene he was describing, a life where it was just us, our family

“maybe in another life Nik” i whispered and he sobbed

“no, this life, i can be human in this life, i need you in this life. Please don’t make me be alone, please i just want you, nobody else ever, just come home please come home please please please I’m so sorry i forgot our anniversary i didn’t mean to, I’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’ll make it better, i can i promise, i really can”

i was fully crying now, tears streaming

“i know baby, i know” i whispered

“please let me see you”

“i’m in Italy at the moment… i’ll come back to New Orleans in a few days okay? I’ll meet you there okay?”

“i love you so so much, we’re gonna get married and be a happy family i promise”

Now i was sat in the compound for the first time in ages, listening to Elijah tell me that nobody had heard from Niklaus in over a month. I nodded, got up and left with a simple ‘goodbye’. I’ve decided to stay for a while, maybe he’s on his way.

———————————————————————

(third person)

Klaus was lost. He wasn’t in Australia anymore, he didn’t know where he was, he didn’t know why he a had ring and he didn’t know where his love was. Somewhere along the way he had lost his phone and his wallet, he was trying compel people but he was never able to focus enough.

After about 3 more weeks Klaus arrived in New Orleans. He finally got through the compound door, ready to collapse in a heap before he saw her. She was sat in his chair speaking to Rebekah, she looked so gorgeous. Both girls looked right at him while he fell to his knees and crying out a string of incoherent words

———————————————————————

(first person)

His clothes were torn, hair longer and probably matted, i short beard formed on his face while he blurred his words into one jumble. I made my way towards him, going down onto my own knees so i could wrap my arms around his torso

“shhh, it’s okay” i whispered but he just kept shaking his head

“i’m so sorry” he chocked

“it’s okay, it’s okay, breath Nik, you need to breath”

eventually he calmed down a little, we both now sat on the sofa, Rebekah had decoded it would be best to give us some time together.

“how come it took you so long to come back?” i asked quietly and his brows furrowed

“what do you mean? i was looking for you”

“well… klaus, do you remember our phone call?” i asked and his face fell

“did i say something stupid?” he asked and i laughed

“no, you were very sweet actually. you said you were going to take the cure and would be human so we could have a family and be happy. We agreed to meet here a few weeks ago” i told him softly

“oh god i’m so sorry, did you think i wasn’t coming?” his head was in his hands

“did i say we were gonna get married?” he asked muffled

“you did” i laughed

“what did you say?” he asked quietly

“i said…well i said in another’s life but you said that you could make it work in this one which is why we’re meeting…but Klaus i understand that you were drunk and probably on something else but i don’t think i need to know and so if-“

“i want to, i’m going to do anything and everything to be perfect for you, i’ll take the cure, we can move away, have our children and get engaged, i actual ready have a ring i think drunk me was very confident… maybe we’ll get engaged before the kids” he was staring at nothing while thinking things out

“klaus… i dont know if i can do all that right now…”

“no i know, not straight away, we’ll move slow, i wont push you but i mean…we can try…right?” he voice was small and his eyes full of hope

“we can try” i smiled slightly and i hugged him tight

“but first you need a shower and we’re shaving your beard and i’ll cut you hair a little and definitely brush it” he laughed and nodded picking me up and carrying me to the bathroom and handing me the hair brush. He was wrong for what he did, but he had suffered and he was sorry, there’s not much else i could want from him, he was trying his best.

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quichein-me-softly · 3 months ago

Text

a fine line w/ sans pt. five

(enemies to lovers!sans x reader— TW: mentions of dusting/monster death.)

pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 3.5 | pt. 4

Weeks pass, but the memories of that last fight hangs around like a bruise that hasn’t quite healed. Sans has been more distant than usual, and while you’ve grown used to his tendency to retreat when things get too heavy, this time feels different. The silence between you both has stretched longer than ever before, and every day that passes without a word from him makes the ache in your chest deepen.

You’ve tried to move forward, keeping busy with your routine, but there’s always a shadow following you, the unresolved tension with Sans hanging in the back of your mind. It feels like something broke that night—something you’re not sure how to fix.

You’ve stopped expecting him to show up unexpectedly like he used to. The quiet of your home feels heavier now without him popping in, and the absence of his usual lazy grin and sarcastic quips gnaws at you more than you’d like to admit.

It’s late one evening when you finally decide to step outside, needing fresh air to clear your mind. The night is cool, and the quiet streets offer a sense of calm, but it doesn’t soothe the gnawing anxiety in your chest. You walk aimlessly, trying to shake the feeling that something is still unresolved.

Then, as you round a corner, a chill runs down your spine. You see a figure standing in the dim light of a streetlamp—someone unfamiliar. Tall and cloaked in shadow, their presence feels immediately wrong. They haven’t noticed you yet, their gaze scanning the empty street with a kind of cold calculation that makes your heart race.

Instinctively, you freeze. Every muscle in your body tenses as your mind screams at you to leave, to turn and run. But something keeps you rooted to the spot—a creeping dread that whatever this is, it’s dangerous, and running might only draw its attention.

The figure suddenly looks up, and their eyes lock onto yours. A slow, deliberate smile creeps across their face, and your blood runs cold.

“Ah,” the figure says, their voice low and unsettling, “I didn’t expect to run into you tonight.”

You don’t recognize them, but the way they speak makes it clear—they know who you are. And worse, they were waiting for you.

Fear grips you tightly, and every instinct tells you to get out of there, but you know that you’re cornered. The figure takes a slow, measured step toward you, their movements almost predatory.

“Don’t worry,” they say, their voice dripping with dark amusement, “this won’t take long.”

You’ve stumbled into something far more dangerous than you anticipated, and with no one around to help, you realize you’re on your own.

“Who are you?” you ask, your voice trembling despite your best efforts to keep it steady. Instinctively, you take a few steps back, your body tensing as adrenaline surges through you. The figure moves with an unsettling calm, their smile never wavering as they close the distance between you with slow, deliberate steps.

“That’s not important,” they reply, their tone chillingly casual, as if this encounter were nothing more than a simple conversation. “What matters is you—and what you’re carrying.”

Your heart races, confusion swirling in with the fear. What I’m carrying? The thought barely has time to form before the figure steps forward again, their gaze locking onto yours with a predatory intensity.

“You’ve got something… special,” they say, their voice soft but sharp, like a knife cutting through the stillness of the night. “And I’m here to take it.”

Your mind races, trying to make sense of their words. You know what they’re talking about—your Determination. Something all humans have, unlike monsters. The power that flows through you, the same force that made you strong enough to survive the Underground.

“I—I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you stammer, taking another step back, your legs shaking as you try to keep distance between you and the figure.

They chuckle darkly, shaking their head. “Oh, you know exactly what I’m talking about. You’re not the first human I’ve come across, and you won’t be the last.”

Your stomach drops at their words, and a cold realization washes over you: this isn’t just a threat—it’s a hunt. They’ve been looking for you, tracking you, and now, they’ve found you.

Before you can react, the figure suddenly lunges forward, faster than you could have imagined. You barely have time to think as they close the gap between you, a cold, unsettling energy radiating from them. Your breath catches in your throat, and you scramble to find a way out, your body trembling as fear takes over.

Before you can react, they lunge forward with terrifying speed, and in an instant, their hand strikes hard against your chest. The impact knocks you off balance, and you hit the ground hard, the air rushing out of your lungs. Pain shoots through you, and for a moment, the world spins.

But it’s not just the physical pain. It’s something deeper, something that makes your entire body feel like it’s being pulled apart from the inside. You can feel it—your SOUL—vibrating with an unnatural force, as if it’s being drawn toward them, as if they’re trying to rip it out of you.

“Ah, there it is,” the figure murmurs, their voice filled with dark satisfaction as they stand over you. “I can feel it now. Your SOUL… so full of power, so full of life.”

You try to move, to scramble away, but their presence seems to press down on you, pinning you to the ground. Your chest burns with a strange, unnatural heat as the pressure around your SOUL intensifies. Panic surges through you as you struggle to breathe, every instinct screaming at you to fight back, but your body feels heavy, like it’s trapped under an invisible weight.

“Don’t bother struggling,” they say softly, their voice dripping with cold amusement. “It’s no use. Your SOUL is already mine.”

Your vision blurs, and the fear gnaws at you—your SOUL, the very essence of who you are, is slipping away. The figure’s hand hovers over you, as if they’re preparing to claim it completely.

Desperation wells up inside you as you try to push back, your mind racing for any way out, any way to escape. But the crushing force around your SOUL is growing stronger, and you realize with chilling clarity that this might be the end.

If you don’t do something soon, you’ll lose everything.

Your body screams in protest as you extend a trembling hand toward the figure, a feeble attempt to take back what’s slipping away. Every inch feels like a battle, the weight pressing down on your chest making it almost impossible to move. But you have to try—you can’t just let them take your SOUL.

The figure watches you with a twisted grin, their eyes gleaming with amusement as your hand reaches toward the air between you. “Still trying, huh?” they sneer, their voice dripping with mockery. “How cute.”

But despite their words, you press on, your fingers stretching out as if reaching for some invisible thread, trying to pull your SOUL back from the dark force that’s tearing at it. Your vision blurs as the pressure intensifies, a cold sweat breaking out on your skin as every breath feels like it might be your last.

Your hand, weak and shaking, connects with something—your SOUL, pulsing faintly just out of reach. You can feel it, barely there, struggling to stay anchored to you. But the force around it is too strong, too overwhelming, and your hand falters, slipping as the figure tightens their grip.

“Almost there,” they murmur, their hand tightening in the air, pulling harder as your SOUL flickers like a dying light.

You grit your teeth, summoning every ounce of strength left in your body, but it’s not enough. Your vision begins to fade, darkness creeping in from the edges as your SOUL starts to tear away from you, your very essence slipping through your fingers.

Your hand drops limply to your side, the last of your energy draining away. This is it. You can feel it—your SOUL is slipping from your grasp, and you’re too powerless to stop it.

Then, just as the world begins to go black, you hear a sound—faint, but unmistakable. A charging of energy, followed by a familiar voice, low and dangerous.

“i’m gonna fucking kill you.”

For a moment, you think you’re imagining it, that maybe this is what the end sounds like. But then there’s a crackle, a sudden surge of energy, and the figure looming over you recoils, startled. Your body feels lighter, the crushing weight on your chest easing as the grip on your SOUL loosens.

You blink, struggling to focus, and through the fog, you see him—Sans. He’s standing there, his normally laid-back posture gone, replaced by something cold, lethal. His glowing blue eye burns with a fury you’ve never seen before, raw and unfiltered.

The figure straightens, their mocking smile faltering for the first time. They glance between you and Sans, assessing the new threat, but the power radiating off of Sans is undeniable.

He’s not joking. He’s not making a lazy quip or downplaying the situation. There’s murder in his eyes, and it’s directed at the person who dared to hurt you.

Everything feels like it’s moving in slow motion as Sans approaches, the crackle of his magic buzzing in the air around him. He sees you on the ground, your hand limp, your SOUL nearly torn away, and something inside him snaps. All the lazy grins, the jokes, the walls he’s built up—they crumble in an instant.

All that’s left is rage.

Sans knows what they see when they look at him: “Sans—1 ATK, 1 DEF—the easiest enemy. Can only deal 1 damage.” He’s a joke in the grand scheme of power, a lazy skeleton with no real strength. But he’s never been about brute strength. His power is precision, timing, and his will to protect what matters. They underestimated him. And now, they’re going to regret it.

The second he saw that figure standing over you, pulling at your SOUL like it was theirs to take, his mind went blank. No jokes. No humor. No sarcasm. Just pure, seething anger.

“burn in hell.”

The words come out low, cold, deadly. There’s no room for mercy here. He watches as the figure recoils, sensing the change in the air. Good. They should be afraid. They’ve made the worst mistake of their life by going after you.

Sans steps forward, and his glowing blue eye flares brighter, his magic swirling around him, ready to tear them apart. The figure’s smug grin falters as they realize what they’re up against.

They lunge toward him, but Sans is faster. With a flick of his wrist, bones shoot up from the ground, surrounding the figure, effectively trapping them. He utilizes his blue magic, slamming them into the ground with brutal force, and they stagger back, caught off guard by the intensity of the attack.

His glare is ice-cold. His focus is razor-sharp, every part of him keyed into the singular goal of making sure this person never threatens you again. He’s tired of holding back, tired of pretending he doesn’t care, and now, it’s all coming out in as a display of overwhelming power.

The figure tries to fight back, summoning their own magic, but Sans is relentless. His attacks are harsh, precise, and unforgiving, each blow fueled by the thought of what almost happened to you. He won’t let them win. He won’t let anyone take you from him.

Your SOUL begins to steady, the connection growing stronger as the figure’s hold on it weakens. Slowly, painfully, you push yourself up, your body still trembling from the ordeal.

As you regain some your strength, you feel the energy in the air shift. Sans is in control, and it’s clear that the figure doesn’t stand a chance. With one final, devastating blow, Sans hurls them back, slamming them against the alley wall with a sickening thud.

The figure crumples to the ground, motionless. Their body dusting away, dissipating into the air like smoke.

Sans stands over them, breathing hard, his glowing eye still blazing with the remnants of his rage. But when he looks back at you, something softens. He takes a step toward you, his expression torn between relief and something else—something deeper, more tender.

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, just stands there, his eyes scanning you, making sure you’re really okay. The rage has burned out, but the rawness remains, unspoken between you.

And in that moment, you realize again—Sans had been so, so afraid of losing you.

The alley is quiet now, the only sound the faint hum of leftover magic dissipating into the night. You’re still on the ground, every breath shallow, your body trembling from the strain of what just happened. Your SOUL, though no longer under attack, feels frail, as if one wrong move could tear you apart.

Sans is still standing over the figure’s empty cloak, his glowing blue eye slowly fading, though his breathing is still ragged, heavy with the weight of what just unfolded. His fists are clenched at his sides, as if he’s holding onto the last bit of his rage, but then his eyes flicker back to you—slumped, barely able to sit up—and something breaks inside him.

He takes a step toward you, and then another, his usual slouched posture gone, replaced by something more raw, more urgent. His steps falter when he gets close, and he kneels down beside you, his hands hovering, unsure where to touch without causing you more pain. His breathing is shaky, and when he finally speaks, his voice is so quiet, so unsteady, you almost don’t recognize it.

“kid…” His voice cracks, the weight of the word heavy, barely a whisper. He doesn’t know what to say, how to make sense of the fear still twisting in his chest. For all the timelines, all the resets, all the losses he’s had to endure—seeing you like this, isn’t something he was ready for.

He reaches out, his hand hovering over yours for a second before he gently grips it, his fingers trembling. His breath hitches, and for the first time, you see tears forming in the corners of his eyes, shimmering faintly in the low light of the alley.

You try to tell him you’ll be fine, but you can’t even manage that. Your body is too weak, and you’re still reeling from the experience of having your SOUL nearly torn from you. A faint, pained noise escapes your throat instead, and Sans’ face twists, panic flaring in his eyes.

For the first time, you see him completely unguarded, the walls he’s always held up around himself in shambles. He lightly squeezes your hand, his grip gentle, but the tremor in his hand betrays his calm facade. His face tightens, his usual lazy grin nowhere to be found. His eyes—those usually half-lidded, carefree eyes—are wide, glassy with emotion you’ve never seen him show before.

“i… i almost lost you.” The words are barely a whisper, shaky and uneven, as if saying them aloud makes the fear more real. His grip on your hand tightens, fingers trembling. Just as quickly, he retracts his hand, afraid his touch will cause you to shatter.

“shit… i-i should’ve been faster,” he mutters, his voice cracking under the strain.

You try again to speak, to tell him that it wasn’t his fault, that you’re still here, that he saved you. But you can’t. The words just don’t come, and the effort is too much.

Sans looks down at you, his breath hitching, and that’s when you see it—tears, welling up in the corners of his eyes. He’s trying to hold them back, to stay strong, but the emotions are hitting him all at once. You’re dying, he has dust on his hands, and he doesn’t know how to make any of this right. l

He’s never let himself feel like this before, never let anyone see him break, but here he is, kneeling beside you, his hands trembling as he tries to figure out how to help you or ease your pain.

“you… you almost…” His voice breaks completely, and he finally lets out a shaky breath, one tear sliding down his cheek as he squeezes his eyes shut. “i’m so sorry—fuck! i… i keep going without you. i can’t.”

His words come out in a rush, essentially word vomit, and you can see how deeply it’s affecting him, how mortified he was of losing you. The one person who’s always been able to get under his skin, the one person he’s let himself care about despite every wall he’s built. He’s crumbling now, right in front of you, and there’s nothing you can do but lie there, watching as he struggles to hold it all together.

“you were always the tough one, y’know?” His voice quivers, it breaks your heart to see him so scared.

“hell, i don’t… i don’t know even how to live without you,” he says, his voice a low, trembling whisper. “i can’t… i’m not strong enough to this alone.”

You want to tell him he is. You want to reach out and touch his hand, to let him know that he’s stronger than he thinks, that he saved you, that you’re still here because of him. But all you can do is look up at him, barely able to keep your eyes open, hoping that he understands what you’re trying to say without words.

Sans swipes at his face with the back of his sleeve, trying to wipe away the tears, but more keep coming. His eyes meet yours, and in that moment, it’s like every wall he’s ever put up between the two of you is gone. He’s completely, devastatingly vulnerable, and it’s breaking him.

He leans in closer, his voice barely above a whisper. “don’t you dare leave me,” he pleads, his voice shaking. “please… don’t leave me.”

For a moment, he looks like he’s about to collapse, his entire body trembling with the burden of what happened. He leans his forehead against yours, his breath warm and shaky against your skin.

“please,” he begs again, his voice raw with emotion.

You feel the faintest flicker of strength return to you, and with every ounce of energy you have left, you manage to move your hand just enough to brush against his. It’s a small gesture, but it’s enough to let him know that you’re still here, that you’re not going anywhere.

His breath hitches again, but this time, there’s a flicker of relief in his eyes as he grips your hand tightly in his.

And for a moment, you both stay there, surrounded by the quiet of the night, the world still reeling from what happened. It took two near-death experiences—one of his own and now yours—for Sans to finally let you in, but now that he has, he has made it clear he will never let you go.

(some fluff here as the resolution because it’s too short to be it’s own subpart.)

The days after your injury are a blur of slow recovery, and through it all, Sans is a constant presence. He’s never been one to express his feelings openly, but now, in the quiet moments when he thinks you don’t notice, his actions speaks louder than words. His patience is endless—he never rushes you, never gets frustrated when your recovery takes longer than expected. Instead, he’s there with you every step of the way, offering quiet reassurances and gentle touches that convey more than he could ever say out loud.

It’s in the way he tucks you in at night. He waits until he thinks you’re fully asleep, the room dark and quiet except for the soft hum of the lamp by his chair. You feel the gentle tug of the blanket as he pulls it up over your shoulders, making sure you’re warm and comfortable. Sometimes, you catch him brushing a lock of hair from your face, his fingers lingering just a little too long as if to reassure himself that you’re really there, safe and sound.

“goodnight, sweetheart,” he whispers softly, his voice barely audible in the stillness of the room, and you pretend to be asleep, not wanting to break the gentle quiet of the moment.

In the mornings, he’s there with breakfast, bringing it to your bedside with a soft grin that melts away your hesitation about needing help. When your hands are too shaky to hold a spoon, he doesn’t hesitate. He sits by your side, patiently feeding you with careful hands, never making you feel embarrassed or burdensome.

“take your time,” he murmurs, his voice calm and soothing as he holds the spoon for you, his thumb gently brushing against your hand in quiet reassurance. His eyes never leave yours, watching you carefully to make sure you’re okay.

Even when you have nightmares—those fever-induced night terrors that leave you gasping for breath—Sans is there, no matter how tired he is. You remember waking up, disoriented and panicked, the nightmare still clinging to the edges of your mind, and before you can say a word, he’s already at your side.

“shh, you’re alright, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice low and gentle as he presses a cool cloth to your forehead. His hand finds yours in the dark, his grip steady and warm, grounding you back in reality. You can see the exhaustion in his eyes, the way his eyelids droop from lack of sleep, but he never once complains. Instead, he stays with you until the nightmares fade, his thumb tracing slow circles on the back of your hand, his presence a quiet comfort in the darkness. “shh, i’m still here. you’re safe.”

On days when you feel strong enough to move around, Sans is always nearby, hovering just out of sight, ready to catch you if you stumble. One afternoon, as you try to make your way across the room, your legs give out beneath you. Panic floods your chest, but before you can fall, Sans is there, his arms wrapping around you with surprising strength.

“i gotcha,” he says softly, holding you close for a moment before helping you back to your feet. His touch is firm but gentle, and even as your legs wobble, he never lets go until he’s sure you’re steady. He guides you back to the bed, his hand lingering on your waist for just a second longer, and when you finally sit down, he gives you a soft smile.

“no rush, sweetheart,” he says, his tone light but full of warmth. “you’ll get there.”

Through all of this—his care, his patience, his quiet presence—Sans never complains. Not once does he act like any of it is a burden. In fact, he seems genuinely happy to help you, to be there for you in ways you never expected. His actions speak volumes about how much he cares, even if he doesn’t always say it outright.

And then, one evening, after another day of slow progress, you’re sitting on the couch together, wrapped in a blanket with his arm resting lightly around your shoulders. The room is quiet, the soft glow of the lamp casting a warm light over both of you. Sans has been uncharacteristically quiet, his usual teasing remarks replaced with something softer, something more thoughtful.

“y’know,” he starts, his voice hushed and hesitant, “you really scared me back there.”

You look up at him, surprised by the vulnerability in his tone. His usual grin is gone, replaced by something more serious, more raw. His eyes meet yours, and for a moment, the weight of everything you’ve both been through hangs in the air between you.

“i didn’t know if you’d pull through,” he admits, his thumb gently tracing the curve of your shoulder. “and i… i don’t even wanna think about what i'd do without you.”

Your heart tightens at his words, the emotion in his voice making your chest ache. You reach up, your hand gently resting on his as you meet his gaze.

“I’m still here,” you whisper, your voice soft but full of reassurance. “Like I promised.”

Sans lets out a shaky breath, his hand tightening around yours. “good,” he murmurs, his voice barely audible as he leans in closer, his forehead resting against yours. “’cause i don’t think i could handle another scare, sweetheart.”

Before you can respond, he closes the distance between you, pressing his lips to yours in a soft, tender kiss. His hand cups your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin as the kiss deepens, and for a moment, the world fades away, leaving only the warmth of his touch and the steady beat of your heart

When he finally pulls back, his eyes are soft, full of emotion as he looks at you. “been meanin’ to do that for a while now,” he admits with a quiet chuckle, his usual grin returning, though it’s softer, more genuine.

You smile, your heart full as you lean into his chest. “Me too.”

From that moment on, everything between you and Sans changes. The care he shows you doesn’t stop—in fact, it only deepens. He still tucks you in at night, thinking you don’t notice. He still feeds you when you’re too weak, still catches you when you stumble, still holds you through the nightmares. But now, there’s something more between you—a love that’s grown quietly, steadily, in the space between all the small gestures and patient moments.

And every time he calls you sweetheart now, it’s not just an affectionate nickname—it’s a reminder of everything you’ve been through together, of the quiet, unwavering love that’s grown between you, one tender moment at a time.

#fanfiction #sans #sans the skeleton #sans x reader #sans undertale #undertale #enemies to lovers #angst with a happy ending #angst #fluff #sans fanfic #quichein

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slvt4em1lyprenti2s · 2 years ago

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Arizona Robbin x reader - Bonding over a trauma

First posted on my Wattpad - arizona_is_my_wife

Word count: 965 (including A/N)

Arizona's POV: Owen - "Incoming trauma people, multiple car collisions 5 injured and critical 2 dead on site be ready!" Great. I've just got out a surgery on a kid who needed a new bowel but there was some complications so it ran over and I was in the OR for like 11 hours and now this? Don't get me wrong I adore my job but I just want to sleep. I go and get a trauma gown on and wait for the ambulances. Y/N - "Hey I assume you got called down here for the trauma as well?"

Y/N's a cardiothoracic surgeon whom I happen to have a massive high school style crush on, she's a god. Like I don't think I've ever seen her lose a patient. Sure she may not cure them all the way and might have just bought them a couple more months but, that's better than dying on the table and if she couldn't do anything no one else could've. Arizona - "Yeah I was, I hope it's not too bad because I just got out of a really long surgery so I want to sleep so bad" Y/N - "I feel you, I just got done with a CABG it didn't take long only 5 hours but I've been at work since 4:30am for pre rounds and it now what? 6:30pm." Arizona - "Man that's rough, wanna grab a drink at Joe's after this?" Y/N - "Sure, I could do with some alcohol." Our conversation was short lived as we heard the wail of the ambulance siren rapidly approaching. Paramedic - "Female, 17 years old, multiple lacerations to the abdomen and chest, presumably a broken leg and a foreign body lodged in her chest!" Y/N - "Thank you we've got it from here."

Time skip

We managed to stitch up all her other wounds and stabilise her leg until Callie can come look at it and now we're trying to figure out what object is sitting dangerously close to her heart. I go and collect the scans to show y/n. Arizona - "Well, it doesn't look like glass." Y/N - "Definitely not glass. Wait.." Arizona - "What, what? Did you see something?" Y/N - "Crap! That's pushing right on her left ventricle we need to get her to an OR now before it penetrates it and she bleeds out!"

We rush her into an OR and crack her chest. Y/N - "In all my years of being a surgeon I have never seen a girl with a piece of number plate (license plate) in her chest, what about you Robbins?" Arizona - "Yeah no, this is a first for me too."

As we continued to operate nothing went wrong, like I said, god. So before I knew it, it was time to close and for Callie to come in and fix her leg. We left an intern to close because we both just wanted out of the hospital at that point.

We walked to Joe's and sat at a table and ordered drinks, I got a vodka and lemonade she got a beer. We sat in silence for a while until she spoke up Y/N - "You know, we should really hang out more, your a very fun person to be around. You're so bubbly and fun so.. yeah just an idea." It was cute because I could tell she was nervous and in all fairness I was nervous to reply because I didn't want to screw this up. Arizona - "I'd love that, you're a very nice person to be around too y/n."

Y/N POV: For weeks we have been flirting, weeks. Yet neither one of us has made a move. This is the closest we have got to asking the other out ever, so, I took it upon myself to make an even bigger move. I leaned in and kissed her. Her lips were soft and fit perfectly against mine. I felt her melt into the kiss and all my nerves around the whole situation evaporated. Her hand trailed its way from her lap to my cheek and the other to my hip. I took the incentive to wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer. At this point air was becoming a problem so we pulled apart. Arizona - "I know it might be a bit soon so no pressure but because we've know each other for a while and with all the flirting I just assumed we could skip the whole 'talking' stage and just got straight to being girlfriends I mean if you don't want to it's fine like I said no pressure or anything.." As she rambled I just stared right into her blue orbs, they're so mesmerising and just downright gorgeous. She stopped talking to that made me snap out of my trance. Arizona - "So?" Y/N - "Arizona, I would love nothing more than to be your girlfriend." She smiled ear to ear as I pulled her into my embrace. She buried her head into my shoulder and we just sat there for a bit before deciding to crash at her place for the night.

As we layed in her bed she was cuddling me, my head was in her chest and my arms around her like a koala. She wrapped her arms around my tired frame and rested her head atop mine and whispered sweet nothings into my ear as we fell into a peaceful slumber.

Don't get me wrong it was a tragic accident and I would never wish it upon anyone ever but, I am happy the trauma came in because otherwise this wouldn't of happened, I wouldn't have Arizona. My Arizona <3

A/N: First post!! It's not the best but, what'd you think? Remember to leave requests :)

#arizona robbins x you #arizona robbins #greys anatomy #grey's anatomy #meredith grey #derek shepard #mark sloan #sapphic #lesbian pride #wlw fanfic #wlw #jo wilson #callie torres #april kepner #arizona robbins x reader

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rorywritesjunk · 9 months ago

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(😌😌😌 I got a tummy ache from eating too many cookies at work so here's the next part.)

pt 1 + pt 2 + pt 3 + pt 4 + pt 5 + pt 6 + pt 7 + pt 8 + pt 9 + pt 10 + pt 11 + pt 12 + pt 13 + pt 13.5 + pt 14 + pt 15

pt 11

It... It was miserable. Every time the door opened, Sunny would look up, expecting Buggy to march through the door, asking why she was so sad, that she should smile because he was fine! There was nothing to be sad about!

Four months of sadness, denial, anger, everything.

She visited her family during that time, taking a few weeks to see her parents, her cousins and aunts and uncles. She put on a fake smile, acted like nothing was wrong, no, she didn't have a boyfriend, she was far too busy with her apprenticeship to even think of that.

Her parents could tell something was wrong but they waited until the middle of her visit to ask.

"Nothing! Nothing is wrong." Sunny insisted, smiling brightly as she cleaned the kitchen. "Why would you think that?"

"Because we're your parents and we can tell." Windy told her as she sipped her drink. Blue, her husband, nodded. "We're worried."

"Well, nothing to be worried about. I'm fine." Sunny said as she started filling the sink with water. "Just tired, you know. There's a lot of business at that little shop."

"She's not working you too hard, is she?" Blue frowned. "If you're not happy there, you can stay home. You don't have to go back."

Sunny paused for a moment, listening to her father's suggestion. She could. Why should she bother going back? The last year she had been focused on fulfilling her apprenticeship to join Buggy on his ship but now that was out of the question. It wasn't going to happen.

"Sweetheart?" Blue asked. "You sure you want to go back?"

"I do, yea." Sunny replied as she started scrubbing a skillet. "I meet a lot of interesting people there, you know. I was able to go onboard a ship and meet Whitebeard! He's so tall!"

Her parents shared a look; her mom looked back over at her. "If you're sure, we won't push you. We just want you to be happy."

"I am happy, really." Sunny smiled. "I like what I do. Thank you, though."

She wrote in her journal that she missed Buggy. She wished nothing had happened, that maybe the last time they saw each other she should have told him how she felt, but back then she really wasn't sure. It had been just after his birthday, she was so happy to see him, it didn't occur to her it would be the last time they went out together.

Miss Pins seemed a little surprised to see Sunny when she returned. Did her boss think she gave up already?

Sunny decided she wasn't ready to give up. She'd keep trying. She would keep helping customers, building up her skills, and even if she couldn't gift Buggy a fancy captain's hat and jacket then fine, she would do it for someone else. Make them flashy, stand out, even if she didn't think they would be anything like him.

She worked hard, listening to tips from the older apprentices, helping Miss Pins with customer measurements, taking notes, everything. She wanted to be the best.

A few weeks later, after a particularly busy day ended with a customer making her feel uneasy, she went out to get a crepe. It was a little bittersweet, remembering getting there with Buggy several times, and as she sat down, taking a bite, she felt tears in her eyes. The food was tasteless, giving her no joy in the sweetness as she thought of him.

She chewed it slowly with a sniffle before swallowing. Was it always going to be like this? They weren't even together. They were just friends.

If she could see him again she would tell him how she felt. Sunny regretted not doing it before.

As she forced herself to enjoy the crepe, someone approached her. She tried to ignore them, not wanting to talk to a stranger, but when their hand reached out, their finger scooping a bit of the whipped cream off the crepe, she looked up, ready to shout at them to back off, but she froze when the hand returned to its owner.

He looked smug, his blue hair was pulled back, and he had a little bit of scruff on his face, but Buggy stood there, licking his finger clean.

"Miss me?"

#buggy the clown #sunny x buggy #mini fic #two in one night what #buggy the clown x oc #buggy x oc #buggy's older sister au

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lover-girl-estxx · 9 months ago

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hi!! i’ve absolutely been devouring your ufc fics lol. just wondering if you can do a sean strickland x reader where she discovers she’s pregnant and tells sean? maybe it can go through like the whole pregnancy up to the birth? just take it and run with it!! i can’t stop seeing sean as a girl dad bahaha! thank you💗

Dad Strickland

"are you sure you'll be fine?" he asked in the doorway of our bathroom "Yeah peach it's just a little cold promise" I said from our bed. i had been throwing up the past to mornings and a headache "i'll come back early today" "don't worry" he kissed my head "love you bye" "Love you" he walked out closing the door. I did not have a cold at all nor was I sick my period was late and Sean's Sean so me being pregnant was not unlikely. So I put some sweats on and grabbed my keys, I drove to the closed CVS and grabbed a test before going to the check out.

"Babe?" Sean said as I opened my car door "Sean what are you doing here?" I threw the bag into the car "getting me and the guys more Monsters I thought you were sick" he smiled "I am I came to get some sprite and bananas" I sighed and slightly smiled "okay," he said unsure "well i'll see you at home" he kissed my head "yeah!" I nodded.

It sat on the bathroom sink, me on the toilet cover. I was nervous you know Sean hasn't really said for sure that he wanted kids he had made comments how it would be nice but he didn't know how good of a dad he would be or if kids is really something he wants and he just feels he has too.

I sighed and and flipped the test 'Positive' I smiled "oh my god" my eyes started to water I slightly squealed. At this point I don't even really care what Sean has to say i'm super happy!.

I heard the front door open a few hours later, I put the test in my pocket and pretty much ran down the stairs. "sprite can do a lot I guess" he said putting his gym bag down "yeah," I smiled widely "come sit with me" I grabbed his hand and pulled him to the couch. "whats up?" he put his arm on the back of the couch "I have to tell you something! but don't be nervous okay?" "okay?" his brows going together "I don't have a cold the reason I was at CVS because i'm pregnant" I smiled "what?" "I got test this morning and its positive" "really?" I sighed and nodded he took a deep breath and put his head in his hands "sean your making me a little nervous" I whispered.

He looked up his eyes slightly watered "baby i'm so excited" he smiled I smiled back and wrapped my arms around him, he did the same "we have a doctors appointment tomorrow morning" I said kissed his cheek.

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"you are about a month along!" the nurse said "really? that far?" I asked she nodded "sometimes it people don't know till they have a baby" I looked to Sean he pushed his brows together same as me "when can we know the gender?" he asked "well if you do a blood test you can find out in 9-10 weeks but it won't be for sure, or wait till 18-24 weeks" "how long is that?" Sean asked "like 4-6 months" I replied he groaned "thats a long time" I nodded.

We were driving back home in Seans Tesla which he was driving the speed limit which I don't think hes ever done before "when can I tell people?" he asked "after the first trimester which is three months" "why?" he held my hand "just to make sure gos right" he nodded and slightly bit his lip "i'll be okay promise Peach" I smiled and rubbed his cheek "k" he smiled.

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Month 2 Weeks

"Babe where are you?" he said coming back from the gym "kitchen!" he came in "why are you up?" I giggled "i'm hungry and your hungry soo" "no go sit down i'll finish" "no it's fine" "go sit" "okay Peach" I softly grabbed his chin and pecked his lips.

-- Seans POV --

I heard her turn her show on and get cozy on the couch. I finished up dinner and made her a plate and got her a drink, I walked around the couch "her-" she was dead asleep shes been falling asleep everywhere and anytime. She softly snored and brought the throw pillow closer to her, she sighed and slightly opened her eyes "is the food ready?" she whispered "yeah" I chuckled as she sat up and I handed her the bowl.

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2 Months

"oh" the nurse said "what?" I asked Y/n looked up at me "nothing" the nurse added "you can't do that. is everything okay?" Y/n asked "i can't say but everything is fine health wise" Y/n looked unsure up at me as the woman moved the thing around on her stomach. The doctor finally came in "okay so I have some news for you guys!" she smiled "yes?!" Y/n said "you guys are pregnant with..Twins!" Y/ns mouth opened and laughed "I am?!" "she is?!" she nodded "they are both very healthy! there is baby 1 and right next to that is baby 2" she pointed on the screen, I looked down to Y/n with a wide smile on her face.

We walked out she was holding my hand and started slightly jumping up and down "i'm excited and Nervous!! oh my god are you excited?!" she looked up at me "i'm excited!" i smiled she smiled wider "I can't wait!" she grabbed the back of my neck pulling me down and kissing me.

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3 Months

--Y/ns POV --

We invited all our close family to the house and we made dinner, no friends I was kinda tell mine at brunch in a few day and me and Sean are going to the gym together and tell the guys tomorrow. We were sitting at the table "here guys me and sean got you guys something" I smiled handing mine and his mom a envelope, they both opened them "oh my god really?!" my mom asked I nodded she hugged me "look it's twins!" dawn (seans mom) said she handed the ultrasound to Seans brother and SIL, she hugged me too "careful mom" Sean said as his brother gave him a shoulder pat. "I can bring you all the boys stuff like they're cribs and stuff" my sister said "i'll let you" she walked away "i'm not putting my kids in her hippy cribs" Sean whispered to me I looked up and smiled patting his chest "I know" he scoffed a laugh.

They had all left, Sean walked his brother out while I was cleaning up the plates and all the trash. "what are you doing?" he asked "cleaning up?" I shrugged "go sit down i'll clean up" "no its fine you did a lot of the cooking" I kept grabbing the plate "your also 3 months pregnant with twins so go sit down" he took them from me "fine" I went to the couch.

It was the next morning and we were getting ready for the gym, I put leggings and one of Sean's shirts. "I'm tired" I yawned "you want to stay home?" He asked coming up behind me "no I'm fine promise" "you sure?" I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck, I nodded he leaned down and kiss me moving his hands to under my butt "we're not gonna make it the way your kissing me right now" I said pecked his lips and moved away "is that so bad?" he said and shrugged "yes, come on" I called over my shoulder. I was about to go down the stairs he lifted me up "what are you doing!?" I smiled "no more stairs for you" I giggled.

He opened the car door for me and helped me out "thank you" he grabbed my hand "how do I tell people your pregnant?" "how ever you want to" "we did it so much that I finally knocked you up?" he smiled "I would perfer something else but thats fine" "i'll figure something else out" he laughed opening the gym door. Sean was pretty excited he was just about the only one in the gym with no kids, Chris just had a kid Eric has three. "hey Mrs. Strickland!" Eric said making me smile "hi coach Nicksick!" he smiled.

They were all standing around after wresting about to end "guys I got something to say," I watched most of the guys roll they're eyes making me smile "i don't know what to say but Y/ns pregnant! with twins" he smiled, they all jumped around him then they all came over and hugged me "do you know what they are?" Chris asked "next month!" he nodded "give us two more fighters" I chuckled "two more seans? I don't know about that" he laughed.

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4 Months

I had on a light purple sundress Sean had on the same thing he wore everyday "is that good?" he asked setting up the camera, I nodded "perfect," I smiled "come on I can't wait!" he smiled and sat next to me. "what do you want?" he asked "boy and girl so I don't have to give birth third time" "i'll be happy with anything!" "now you make me sound like a bitch" "no" he smiled and rubbed my back. "baby B and I have Baby A" we both made a cupcake in front of us "ready?" he whispered I nodded we both smiled and bite our cupcakes, I pulled mine back Pink we both turned our cupcakes to each other both of our cupcakes were pink "oh my god!" I laughed wrapping my arms around him. He held me tight smiling "are you happy?" I whisper in his ear "baby i'm more then happy" I pulled back and softly grabbed his chin kissing him.

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5 Months

"give me all the names" Sean said as we sat on the bed

"April, Scarlet, blayke, Sage, Cleo , Anastasia and Sidney"

"blake? Thats a boy so no thats my veto"

"Okay" I chuckled "what would you chose?" he asked me

"I think Cleo and Sidney are cute"

"Sage and Sidney" I smiled "perfect peach!" he pulled me into him "I thought that would take longer" I nodded "I guess we're just better than everyone else" I shrugged.

"I got you something" Sean said from the front door "whats that?" I asked from the couch, he brought a huge amazon package to me "do we have room for this?" he nodded and handed me his keys to open the box "thanks". I opened it and pulled out a pregnancy pillow "oh my god I wanted this!!" I pulled it out laying with it "thank you peach!" he kissed my head "my lips" he smiled and kissed me.

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6 Months

I sat on the floor of the girls room, in a pair of shorts and sports bra. It was hot as fuck in Vegas in the summer and I was trying to put these cribs together while Sean was training "this makes no sense!" I groaned throwing the info paper. I started to try again before sighing and going to get up, which I guess I couldn't do. So I laid back and grabbed my phone, the dog joining me.

"what are you doing?" Sean slightly chuckling "I thought I could put these together but I can't and then I got stuck down here" I groaned he laughed "come here" he stood over me as I put my hands out he pulled me up "thank you" I said tired he kissed me "how are all my girls?" "Tired and hungry and upset" I put my hands on his shoulders "why are you upset?" He rubbed my lower back "because I wanted to set they're room up" I pouted as my eyes started to water he sighed "I'll make you something to eat then set the cribs up while you nap okay?" I nodded and he pulled my head to his chest rubbing my back kissing my head.

I was sitting in our bed Watching TV and he brought me a big plate of food "thank you peach!" I smiled and he nodded and kissed me "yeah! I'm gonna go do the cribs k?" "You sure you don't need help?" "Yeah I'll get it done quick" "okay" he pecked my lips before going back into the girls room.

When I woke up later I grabbed my phone and checked the time '6:48pm'. I walked into the the room he had them both set up and a was putting sheets on they're small bed "you already finished?' I yawned "yeah! they look good right?" "they look great! thank you" "i'm gonna work on the shelves tomorrow my brother is gonna come over and help me" "your already such a good daddy" I smiled and leaned up and kissed him "thanks" he lightly blushed and looked down I kissed his cheek over and over.

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8 Months

"you shouldn't go its to hot" Sean said putting his boots on "I like watching you do interviews though!" "I packed you a lunch if you still think you have to go" "you did?" I stood in front of him hands on my back he nodded "yeah and you need to take water" "I love you so much your so cute!" I kissed the top of his head. He opened his truck door for me helping me get in "here" he handed me a pillow and the lunch bag I smiled.

"did you want to get tea or something?" he asked "no i'm good thank you" I smiled "you sure?" I nodded and kissed his hand that he held. "Hi!" I smiled and hugged Nina "hi how are you?!" she smiled "i'm good you?" "great!". "Nina you have an extra chair for her?" Sean asked "it's fine babe I can stand" "you don't have to though" "yeah I have one" she said grabbing me one "thank you" I smiled. He brought me a water before going and sitting in front of the camera, "sean your gonna be a dad in like to months hows that?" "i'm happy yeah" he smiled and blushed lightly "what are you having?" Nina knew but for the interview "twins both girls!" "did you want a boy?" "yeah and maybe one down the road but i'm still very very grateful and happy about two girls" "are they gonna shoot?" he nodded "yes their mom does its only right" "how is Sean with you being pregnant?" she asked looking to me "10 out of 10," I smiled as she waved me over, he pulled me down on to his knee "he packs lunches and rubs my feet and puts cribs together. Hes great!" he rubbed my back "you heard it here Sean Strickland is in the kitchen" she laughed.

"are you going to the gym later?" I asked as we drove back to the house from Nina's "no," he shook his head "why whats up?" "I just wanted to watch movies tonight after I make dinner" "i'll order something or cook your to big to cook" I gasped "I mean it's hard on your feet and stuff" he smiled making me chuckle "i'll bet".

We were sitting on the couch Seans head by my stomach and his hand resting flat on my stomach while our movie played. A light kick landed on his hand "you feel that?" he asked sitting up slightly I nodded and smiled. This was his favorite thing laying next to me his hand resting on my stomach hoping to feel one small kick. He lifted the white T shirt of his that I wore and kissed my belly "your already such a good daddy" I smiled and rubbed his head he smiled shutting his eyes waiting for another kick.

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9 months

I was hanging and doing last minute things in the girls room when I feel water go down my legs then a sharp pain "oww," I sat in the rocking chair "Sean!" he came in from his gun room "you okay?" he asked coming over to me missing the puddle of water "my water broke can't you see?!" "i'm sorry yes I see baby...come here" he helped me up "you think we should wait?" "no go right now" "you have to pay more" "I don't care" "okay I have to change can you put the bags in the car?" he nodded.

"I don't wanna do this" I said in the bed more pain shooting through me "okay" he ran his fingers through my hair and wiping the one or two tears off my cheeks. "i'd say twenty minutes till its time to push!" the nurse smiled "okay!" I smiled as she walked out "what if I can't?!" I looked up at him "your body is made to do this Y/n you'll do great! Promise" he rubbed my forehead.

"hi" they laid one on my chest "holy shit" Sean whispered "shes so cute" I smiled "heres your other one" they laid her on the other side of my chest. They cleaned them handed one to me and one to Sean "this is Sidney" Sean said holding her in his chest "yeah?" "yeah" me and him not taking our eyes off the babies we were holding "that means I have Sage..my baby Sage hi" I kissed her head he came and sat next to me still holding Sidney "they already look like you" he said and smiled "that means they're gonna act just like you" "let's hope not" "it won't be to bad" kissed sages head "wanna switch?" I nodded.

It was later and he was holding both of them "damn" he sighed and had small tears going down his face "peach" I rubbed his tears off his face "they're beautiful" I kissed his cheek "yeah they are" Sidney started to fuss I grabbed her from him "come here babygirl", I started to feed her "I need some milk too" he smirked "sshh" I giggled "your such a good momma" I smiled "thank you".

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A/n I wanted to make this a lot longer but some things came up so I just want to get it out! Lmk if you guys want part two of the girl at like 5🙂

#ufc #ufc x reader #sean strickland x reader #sean strickland #sean strickland imagine

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