#its my first time using tumblr after 3 years
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kittygamer9110 · 1 month ago
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museganjin · 3 months ago
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edit: eye design on the pin is based off of this video tutorial by yurie sekiya, creator of pero pero sparkles.
#art#artists on tumblr#my art#traditional art#doodle#yeah thats the phone i used to take these photos#i did these around very early june this year#every year there's a festival in the middle of my town celebrating it#its pretty much an event for local organizations and businesses to promote themselves#its kinda boring because its the same every year lol#but i go mainly because 3 4ths of the stalls give out promotional branded thingamabobs and free candyyyy (😋)#one of the local libraries gives out free books - daycares and kids centers have toys to play with#and lastly kids art schools have some crafts#which is how i got to work on the cd and badge in the photo#fun fact: the stall i did the cd at gave me a flyer printed on card stock which i used to make my arrangeable v a angel face#at the second stall i actually made the pin a total of two times because i lost the first one minutes after i walked away#and when i came back a second time the people hosting recognized me so i had to explain myself#on an unrelated note they were so impressed with my second pin that they asked to take a picture of me with it#and post it on their social media. and i agreed because yay someone likes my art ^W^#soooo there is a picture of this badge and my REAL FACE floating around on the internet#i regret it in the slightest because I have the reasonable fear of my appearance being out there out of my control#though i guess that's a lost cause because ive been in the background of friends' posts and school club social media posts#btw i wrote “(to) kill” in japanese in cutesy handwriting on the pin because i thought it would be funny#and i think it's even funnier to imagine that the social media of the kid's art school just has a post of a badge saying “KILL💖”#next to my smug ass face
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theladyfae · 1 year ago
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nothing to me will ever be more iconic than my beloved mutual managing to get me so invested in a (rarepair) ship for a media i had no previous interaction with that i was actively making my own headcanons abt their potential relationship dynamic and making song associations and engaging in others’ brainrot for months before i ever even considered getting in to said media. and now a year later i’m finally writing fic for them but still know next to nothing abt what they’re like in canon cause i still haven’t made it to that part of the story, the memories of the shared delusion are genuinely the only thing keeping me going.
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neil-gaiman · 11 months ago
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Hi Neil,
Regardless of if you ever see this I’ll be happy the sentiment was put there.
As I got into adulthood I lost touch with many of my interests and hobbies. Things like study and work seemed to take over my life and I forgot about many of the things I enjoyed that kept me sane as a child.
But after watching and reading Good Omens I’ve done 4 things:
1. Picked up the piano again after 10 years not playing just so I could learn the theme song. I’ve been at it for months and I’m usually terrible at sticking to things but I’ve promised a friend we are going to do a duet with them playing the kazoo so I have to now obviously
2. I started to draw again on a regular basis
3. I started to write again for the first time since I was a kid and found I actually have quite a passion for it. I’d like to publish at least one book some day with my own illustrations
4. I retuned to tumblr and was pleasantly surprised to find such a wonderful fandom who all love this story as much as I do. And I think it’s wonderful you are also here to watch us all adore it. And so that we can send our appreciation back to you and everyone else involved in making it come to life.
The love and care you and Terry have put into it is so clear. This story and seeing how you interact with the fandom reminded me of how important story telling and creation is to the world. And its lead me back to many things I’d thought I had lost. So thanks to you and every other creative out there, it’s easy to get stuck in our bubble and think what we’re putting out there doesn’t matter. But if you or Terry had given in to that kind of thinking we wouldn’t have Good omens! And that’s something I like to think about when I doubt what I make.
That makes me very happy.
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letters-to-lgbt-kids · 5 months ago
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My dear lgbt+ kids,
Did anyone grew up hearing about the "100 days" rule?
If you have been dating for 100 days, you're engaged.
Now, in its most literal sense, it's pretty clear that this rule doesn't hold true nowadays - in many parts of the world, it'd rather be considered unusual (or even rushed) to get engaged after only 3 months of dating. A quick google search told me that couples in the United States date for 2.5 years on average before they get engaged. Maybe it's more often used in the way I grew up hearing it: 100 days is a pretty long time. It may not be a guarantee you get married (and marriage isn't everyone's life goal anyway and that's fine!), but sticking to someone for 100 days shows commitment. Those first few weeks may be "the honeymoon phase" but anything new still feels fragile. After 3 months, it's not that new anymore. Going strong at 100 days is a milestone to be proud of.
And, importantly, this doesn't just go for 100 days of dating. Relationships aren't the only milestone to celebrate!
100 days of sticking to any happy new habit (or 100 days of abstaining from something that is detrimental to your wellbeing) are something to be proud of. We are often used to measuring sucess in years, but those first weeks are often the ones that take the most courage and you deserve to pat your own back for that.
Special shoutout here to anyone who has reached 100 days clean of any addiction or self-harming behavior! That's an incredible milestone that deserves extra recognition. It's a really hard one that's also really, really worthwhile. It shows a lot of courage and strength.
Other 100 days milestones that have nothing to do with dating could be: getting through the first 100 days of university, a first job or new job, celebrating 100 days of friendship with someone, 100 days of sticking to an exercise routine, even 100 days of regularly showering or cleaning your room if that's something you struggle with! Whatever it is, you deserve to celebrate yourself and be proud of yourself. I sure am, as well!
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
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rqbossman · 4 months ago
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I found out about tma from my friend because he asked me to make an edit of michael distortion and got into it a few months later. I LOVE TMA. I mostly listened to the whole thing three times when I was mostly offline because I have the 200 episodes downloaded on YouTube and now I'm finding out that there's some stuff I missed, there's bloopers, q&a and I was in the wiki because i wanted to see how many times the admiral was mentioned and theres one what the ghost episode? IM GOING INSANE. I love tma. I think it's rotting my brain... it's everywhere, it's in my veins. I need to know everything but when I try to search these things up on YouTube it only shows me rusty quill gaming which I will be watching later but where do I find the other stuff where is the best place to listen to tma and find every extra lore even if it's just the tiniest squeeze of lore? I need to know y'all really did an amazing job with tma, I don't think I'm ever going to get tired of listening to it. I need to relisten to it before hell— I mean... School starts again. Lord save us for another year of merciless torture. Also I was trying to type this fast and forgot to say hi. hi Mr Alex, I hope you're having an amazing day/night when you see this. I promise to listen to all the podcasts rusty quill has after I learn every little squeeze of tma lore. Where is the best place to listen to and learn every little squeeze of information of all of rusty quill podcasts? (I absolutely did not install Tumblr just to ask this what do you mean 😓😓😓)
Lovely to hear from you and thankyou for the kind words. To list good locations for TMA Lore: 1) The podcast feed is obviously first port of call and includes some bonus materials between seasons 2) Our Patreon has an absolutely enormous amount of content in there now and I believe it should at this point be organised into collections so you can just look up TMA and it's all there for you (although that is behind a paywall) 2) Any video QNA's/events etc. not included in the main feed should be on our twitch channel. 3) Rustyquill.com has various links dotted around that have snippets too 4) The fan wiki is a very strong resource. Like any wiki there is the odd error here or there but for the most part its astonishingly accurate and detailed. 5) Special mention to whoever keeps our TV Tropes pages up to date. It was when I saw a proper entry for The Magnus Archives on that site that I actually started to call myself a "proper" writer.
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sorrowsofsilence · 1 year ago
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I Was Always Yours
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Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader
Words: 4.1k
Part Two
Warnings: smut 18+, fluff, swearing, unprotected s*x (pls wrap it b4 u tap it), female recieving, PnV penetration.
Summary: You grew up with Nick Ruffilo and Noah, but its been years since you’ve seen your best friends due to them being away touring. When Ruffilo came back to your hometown, opening his home tattoo studio, you get the opportunity to reconnect with him, and Noah. Deep down you’ve always had something for Noah, and it turns out he’s always felt something for you too. Perhaps seeing eachother years later, after you’ve both changed, sparked something.
Author note: This is short haired Noah era! <3 I just couldn’t resist using the beautiful photo of Noah above :3 Also, I haven’t written on tumblr in years, but I thought I’d come back with this fluff/smut! Enjoy if this finds you! <3
PS. THIS IS A FANFIC ABOUT REAL PEOPLE IN FICTIONAL SCENARIOS. I AM NOT IMPLYING THIS IS HOW THESE PEOPLE ARE IRL OR THAT THIS SITUATION WOULD HAPPEN. IT IS FOR FANFIC PURPOSES ONLY!
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I finally gathered the courage to turn off my car, letting the crisp autumn air bite at my cheeks as I stepped outside. Taking in a shaky breath I allowed my legs to carry me towards the door, my hands clammy and fingers fidgety.
The boys were always simple- and even their nice townhouse was in an everyday neighbourhood, with nothing elaborate on the outside. Just as it had always been, as if time never flew by.
I didn’t know why I was so nervous. I’ve known Nick and Noah for years. We were neighbours growing up, went to high school together, and even shared memories from our adulthood. These boys knew me and I knew them, but I knew that things were different now. 
The boys had just finished tour, and have grown exponentially in their music careers. They walked around with security now, and had fans dedicated to finding out everything about their lives- they’ve become a spectacle; no longer just Nick, or just Noah. 
The nerves also came because I didn’t even know if I’d be seeing Noah. Admittedly, he was my first crush; and really, I don’t think it ever left. When I first met him in seventh grade he sported a shaggy haircut and a dorky grin, and he’s held my heart with iron bars ever since. Over the years I had just accepted that my feelings would never be reciprocated, and we both dated other people on and off. 
It’s been almost three years since I last got to see him due to the pandemic, and we only ever texted each other on big life events, like birthdays, or during the release of their album. I knew the boys were back when Nick sent out a message that he was looking to tattoo again. I sported a few of Nick’s pieces, but I was looking to get a cover-up of a bad decision I made during a past relationship. I texted Nick asking if he was available, and here I am; right outside Nick’s house. 
I sighed deeply, trying to persuade the anxiety out of my lungs, before knocking, following the pattern I had always used when I was younger. Within seconds I was greeted by a pair of grey-green eyes and a wide smile, my nervousness beginning to cease.
“Y/N!” I was pulled into a bone-crushing hug, and I let out a sigh of relief I didn’t know I was holding in. My grin matched his own as I wrapped my arms around him, squeezing back, laughing.
“It’s nice to see you Ruffilo.” 
We pulled away from each other and shared another smile. I took off my leather Doc Martens, straightening my fuzzy red polka-dot socks before giving him another hug, smiling into his neck.
“It’s been way too long,” Nick said, giving me an empathetic glance as we separated. “Life has just been crazy.”
“Yeah, I almost wonder if I should be bowing to you right now considering how famous you’ve gotten,” I couldn’t help but laugh, and Nick rolled his eyes, leading me down the hall. The place was neat; white paint, and light flooring. Various Bad Omen’s posters and records hung neatly on the wall, along with other abstract art pieces. It was delicate and simple, just as they way they always kept it. It’s nice to see that they haven’t changed in that regard. 
“Trust me, no bowing is required.” Nick turned back to face me, his smile radiating, before motioning at a door ahead, and I walked into a small office filled with tattoo supplies. It was Nick’s mini-home tattoo studio. 
“Wow, this is awesome Nick. You’ve always wanted your own little studio.” I said, looking at his work plastered on the wall, soaking it in with awe.
He sighed happily, “Yeah, when we were looking for a house that was one of my requirements. I needed my own space; just because we make music doesn’t mean I’ll give up tattooing.”
I nodded, taking a seat on the chair. “Thank you for seeing me by the way, I appreciate you squeezing me in.”  
“Hey, for you, I’d do anything.” He smiled warmly, sitting across from me. 
Nick and I chatted for almost an hour before even starting the tattoo. We caught up and talked about tours, and I loved getting to listen to his stories about performing and getting to travel the world. It seemed like the dream, especially considering that before the pandemic, they joked about only pleasing ten fans.
However, the entire time I felt distracted. The only thing my mind kept wandering to was if Noah was home, or if he was going to show up. I felt ashamed being so disconnected from the conversation with Nick; because he was someone I cared about deeply. Yet, my thoughts took me elsewhere. 
“You alright?” Nick asked gently, as he started preparing his supplies, glancing at me teasingly.
“Oh yeah! I’m good!” I smiled reassuringly and Nick echoed me, chuckling to himself.
“What?” I asked him, the cheesy grin plastered on his face making me nervous.
“Noah will be home soon, he’s just out with Davis.” 
I stared at him, my cheeks beginning to flush, “Okay, cool?” I shrugged nonchalantly, but my stomach immediately began doing spirals, nerves bubbling throughout my veins.
Nick wiped my thigh, preparing the location for the stencil quietly before asking, “You never told him how you felt?” 
I watched him cautiously, eyes flickering between his hands and his eyes, “I- I don’t feel anything,” I shook my head, ears getting even hotter. “That was so long ago.”
Nick looked up through his lashes, looking very unconvinced, “Sure, and I don’t play in a band.”
Rolling my eyes, I gave him an annoyed smile, “It would be nice to see him. It’s been a long time- and he doesn’t post anything online anymore, or text.”
Nick nodded as he wiped and re-drew the outline on my leg, “Noah’s been pretty recluse. He’s gotten a lot of anxiety from the fame; mostly just sticks to himself when we finish shows. Plus, he doesn’t enjoy dealing with some of the fans.” 
I frowned, feeling myself get sad. Noah has always been pretty introverted, but it looked like he was getting out of his shell on stage. He was playing into the pretty boy facade he had going, and he knew he was hot. I’ve seen plenty of videos from the tour. 
“Well, I hope he is doing alright,” I said softly, looking around the room again for any form of distraction.
As if on cue I heard the front door open, and a yell cascaded down the hall, “You better not have a girl in your room,” he had teased.
Immediately I felt the hair on my neck stand in anticipation, realizing that the voice belonged to Noah. My fingers began to tingle as all the blood rushed towards my face, my chest losing any ounce of breath I was just able to exhale.
His voice bounded across the walls again, “but, these are some pretty sick boots.”
“Got someone even better,” Nick yelled back, laughing, “In the tattoo room.”
A head of brunette hair popped in the doorway, his eyes immediately widening as if his whole world suddenly began to spin within milliseconds. A small flush of colour ran down his ears onto the tops of his cheekbones, before a wide, childlike smile appeared on his face. He stepped into the room, immediately crossing his arms, and leaning on the side of the table as if he thought he was doing something charming.
“No fucking way, look what the cat dragged in,” his Virginian accent dancing off his tongue. 
I looked back at him, my heart racing even faster. I know it’s been a long time since I’ve seen him, but he did take my breath away. Noah looked older, but healthy, becoming a lot more muscular and defined, despite his height and lank still being there. His hair was short, a layer of bangs hanging across his forehead in a messy sweep. It was the first time I’d seen him in person without his long hair, all 13 inches gone; but it suited him. I soaked in his appearance, noticing a few new tattoos layered around his fingers as well, my heart yearning. 
“Is that really my Y/N/N?” he stared at me, the grin not leaving his face, especially after using my childhood nickname. Noah walked towards me shyly with open arms, squinting his eyes in contentment as he invited me in for a hug.
“the one and only.” I breathed a nervous laugh, standing up. Shaky limbs carried me over to him and he wrapped his arms around me, engulfing me within his body. 
I composed myself, inhaling slowly, before hugging back, squeezing his torso. I felt so small compared to him, yet I still fit right between his arms, as if I was meant to always be there, a spot reserved just for me. We rocked back and forth in a tight embrace, his chest vibrating as he let out a happy chuckle. 
“Oh my god, it’s been so long.” I could hear the happiness radiating off of him.
I sighed with relief at his reaction; he must’ve missed me too. He held onto me for a moment more, and I breathed in his scent, recognizing his favourite Dior cologne. Smiling into his chest, It felt comfortable- it felt familiar. Years of memories flooded back, my heart recalling, reminding myself that he was who I had been missing in my life all along. 
“Wow, you’ve changed Y/N,” Noah said as he pulled away, stepping back slightly, taking me in with a look of awe. He absorbed all of me, drinking in my image, before grabbing the sides of my face, and staring into me with an immense amount of appreciation. 
I looked up at him in admiration, studying his deep October eyes as they sang unspoken words, retelling a story that only our bodies knew. 
“Your hair,” I said as my hand unconsciously found its way to his locks.
My fingers flowed down his no longer existing threads, reminiscing of his past image. That chapter of his life was gone. He’s been reborn into a much more confident man, a newer version of the Noah that once was. I almost longed for his old appearance, because I didn’t know this Noah- but by the way his eyes gleamed, he was still mine. 
Noah chuckled, “Yeah, I was tired of getting it in my mouth when singing.”
I couldn’t help but laugh, leaning into his hand, before pulling away to look at Nick.
Nick gave us a sly smile, shaking his head gently. 
“I didn’t expect to see you,” Noah sighed, still smiling. I swear it hasn’t left his face since he saw me. He looked over at Nick, “And you didn’t even tell me?”
“I thought it would be a fun surprise,” Nick looked at Noah playfully, before patting the tattoo chair. I took a seat again, positioning my thigh within Nick's reach. 
“You’re getting some ink?” Noah asked, folding his arms in approval as he leaned over me, looking at the stencil outlined on my skin. 
“Yeah, Nick said he wanted to tattoo again, and I needed an excuse to visit,” I said cheekily. 
Noah nodded repeatedly, still analyzing my thigh. “You never needed an excuse. You should’ve texted us. Texted me.”
I shrugged, “I didn’t want to get in the way. You guys are busy- especially now. the last thing you need is unnecessary messages or phone calls.” 
“I haven’t seen you in like three years Y/N,” Noah said, sighing a sad smile. He sat down on a stool, folding his ankle over his knee. 
Nick began to outline the tattoo, and I winced briefly,  “I know.” 
“You never came to see us on this tour.” Noah looked at the floor, analyzing the outline of his white vans. I glanced at him quickly, before concentrating on Nick’s hands. “You know we’d have gotten you in right?”
I gave him a mournful look, “I’d pay just like everyone else, Noah. I don’t expect anything
but I honestly just got super busy.”
“I was really hoping you’d be there.” 
I felt my heart clench and my chest tighten at his words. “I’m sorry.” I peered over at him, barely being able to maintain eye contact as I chewed the inside of my cheek.
“I’m sorry I didn’t invite you either; it does go both ways,” Noah said, and we shared a wry smile. 
“You should come see us this weekend,” Nick said while concentrating. I furrowed my eyebrows as he scratched along my skin, the area beginning to redden. Despite having multiple tattoos, I never enjoyed the experience of getting them. 
“What time? And where?” I asked, biting the inside of my cheek, and closing my eyes at the burning sensation. 
Noah scrolled on his phone before I felt my own buzz. Looking at it, I saw a message from Noah. It was a ticket with VIP access. 
“I don’t need VIP,” I looked at him in appreciation. 
Noah smiled down at his phone, “Well last time I checked, VIP stands for ‘very important persons’, and arguably our childhood bestie is in that category.” 
“Well, thank you.” I smiled gratefully, butterflies still knocking on every organ in my body.
“So,” Noah began, shifting positions so he was leaning his elbows on his knees, peering over to stare at my leg, “You and Sean broke it off?”
I followed his gaze, staring at the faded puzzle piece beneath the purple markings of Nick's outline. 
Sean was my first serious boyfriend. We were friends in high school, and admittedly always had some sort of connection. We started dating, and were together for four years; before I found somebody else sleeping with him in our bedroom. 
I looked longingly at the puzzle piece, my eyes snapping away once Nick began lining on top of it, covering away the layers of regret, “He cheated on me.” 
Turning to face Noah, his face immediately shifted from sympathetic to anger, “What a complete fucking tool.” He spat, folding his arms in the chair. Noah’s reaction surprised me, but I nodded in agreement. 
“Yep.” I sighed, shrugging my shoulders, “Note to self, don’t get a matching tattoo. You probably won't be with that person forever.” I said, pessimistically. 
Noah was quiet for a moment, his teeth chewing on his bottom lip as he contemplated his question, “Did you catch him?”  
I nodded, furrowing my eyebrows in annoyance, “In our bedroom too.” 
Noah scoffed, audibly groaning while he tilted his head back in hostility, “Pathetic piece of shit. I never liked him being with you.” 
My heart raced as Noah glared at the puzzle piece that began to disappear on my thigh, “At least now you’ll get to have a better piece of art on your body.”
“Exactly,” I smiled proudly, watching Nick’s hands run along the skin, “and it’s the one and only Nicholas Ruffilo’s handy work too.” 
Nick glanced up smiling. It was quiet for a moment, and I chewed on my lip, anxious to ask.
“What about you? Any ladies?” I said to Noah playfully, winking. Deep down though, I was hoping the answer was no one.
Noah gave me a small smile, “No one at the moment, last relationship ended poorly.” 
“That makes two of us.” I chuckled sorrowfully 
+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+
Noah pushed me against the bedroom door, lips attached to my own hastily. His kiss was desperate and hungry as he cupped my face in his hands, and I felt weak in the knees as our hips were pushed together, the heat radiating off of him. 
“You have no idea how long I have waited to do this.” He breathed between kisses.
My hands found their way to Noah’s hair, rubbing my fingers along his scalp affectionately. I smiled through his lips, eagerly holding myself against him. 
“It was so worth the wait.” He whispered, pulling away and putting his forehead against my own. He stared into me, right through me with so much intent. I had always wanted to kiss him, and my heart skipped a beat as I realized where he was, succumbing to me. 
I closed my eyes, smiling, “you have no idea how badly I wanted that too.”
He smiled widely, glancing down at my lips again, this time pulling me into his arms while kissing me with force and passion.
“Tell me how badly,” he whispered, running his fingers delicately across my waist and I melted into his touch.
“Honestly? Probably ever since we met.” I admitted, my face turning red with embarrassment at the confession, “and it’s never gone away.”
“Then why didn’t you?” Noah pulled away from the kiss, running his hand up my arm to cup the side of my face again, thumb tracing a gentle circle along my cheekbone. He looked desperate for an answer as if this was all he’s ever wanted to hear. I felt Noah’s heartbeat racing rapidly through his chest, which heaved heavily against my own. 
“I never thought you felt that way, and I didn’t want to push anything because I didn’t want to lose you,” I confessed, looking away nervously. 
Noah hummed quietly, pulling my chin towards him in another delicate kiss. His lips were warm and gentle. “You’ll never lose me. No matter how long it’s been.”
Noah began running his hands up and down my sides before sliding them between my skin and the hem of my jeans. Immediately I felt flush, and I let my own hands ride up his black t-shirt. His skin was soft and warm, and my fingertips began to tingle with nerves.
Noah hooked his fingers in the loop of my jeans, tugging me towards him and trailing us toward his desk. My thighs hit the back of it, and Noah lifted me gently, placing me on top, and positioning himself between my legs. His warm hands caressed my lower back, creating goosebumps as his nails trailed up and down the skin lightly. I shivered from the sensation.
Noah’s tongue swiped my bottom lip, and I allowed him to kiss me deeper, our tongues melding together. I began tugging at his shirt, and Noah let out a low chuckle.
“You sure you want to do this?” Noah pulled away from my lips to stare into my eyes, looking at me sternly, and analyzing every movement I made.
“yes,” I whined, almost embarrassingly needy, “Do you?”
Noah hung his head, shaking it slowly, “I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to fuck someone so badly in my entire life,” He looked up with hooded eyes.
“Then take me however you want.” I sighed, pulling at his shirt again, and Noah looked at me darkly with lust, his October eyes fading into an onyx abyss.
Noah pulled his shirt over his head, exposing his tattooed chest; I stared at the ink longingly, remembering when he first got his desolate tattoo. I traced my fingers over the letters delicately, smiling to myself. This moment between us felt like I was reminiscing over all my lost time with Noah.
“Do you still feel this way?” I asked softly, as Noah pulled off my own shirt, leaving me exposed in my pink laced bra. Noah placed his hand on top of mine as I traced the last letter.
He shook his head, “No, but it will always be a reminder of when I felt empty.”
“I'm glad you don’t feel that way anymore,” I whispered, and Noah’s hands explored my body once again, before pulling on the hem of my jeans.
Bringing me into a kiss again, he fiddled with the zipper before tugging my pants down my legs, leaving me exposed in my underwear.
“I’ve probably envisioned you naked weekly.” Noah admitted as he kissed down my neck, hands roaming over every inch of skin in desperation, “I need to taste you, princess.”
I blushed at his words, and Noah’s kisses trailed further from my neck, teeth grazing across my collarbone to between my breasts. His breath quickened as he kissed lower and lower, licking down my stomach until he stopped right at the edge of my underwear.
“This okay?” He breathed heavily, his own face flushing. I nodded, and Noah pulled at the lace, revealing me.
“Fuck,” He groaned, looking up through his eyelashes briefly before placing his mouth against me, letting his slim fingers trace patterns across the sensitive skin.
Noah’s tongue circled me before he inserted two fingers, and I let out a moan. He pumped slowly, moaning quietly against me, “Oh, you wouldn’t want Nick to hear.”
I squeezed my thighs together around his head in pleasure, and Noah’s free hand gripped my thigh, pulling me even closer.
I began to pant faster, trying to be quiet, “Oh my god Noah,” I let my head fall back, resting against the wall as Noah ate me out feverishly, like this was his last meal. His fingers curled upwards, the repetitive motion sending my abdomen into a knot of fulfillment, my legs shaking against his body.
“Fuck, I need to stop or I'm going to come in my pants- and I don’t want to yet.” Noah’s eyebrows furrowed with pleasure. Taking his fingers that were inside me into his mouth, he licked them clean before pulling himself up. I watched in disbelief- that was probably the hottest thing I’ve ever seen him do; even compared to Noah’s stage performances of The Death of Peace of Mind. He grabbed my ass, hoisting me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. Noah was extremely hard, his clothed member digging into me as he carried me towards his bed; he kissed me again and I tasted myself off of his tongue.
Noah laid me on the bed, kissing along my neck again as my hands roamed his hair before he unclasped my bra and pulled my panties down, exposing me fully to him.
“You are gorgeous, shit,” Noah mumbled, absorbing me with his eyes as he pulled his shorts down hastily, and I couldn’t help but let my own eyes wander across Noah’s fully exposed body, swallowing hard.
A new warmth washed over me as I got even wetter between my legs, the familiar feeling of excitement preparing my body for Noah’s; but this was different. This time it was Noah, here in front of me. Noah ran his fingers along my folds, moaning and internally begging to replace his hands with his own heat longing to be touched.
Noah spit into his hand and I watched attentively, following his every move as my body shivered. Noah rubbed along himself, before positioning his body above mine.
We shared eye-contact again and I nodded in approval before Noah pushed inside, his body immediately shuddering as I moved my hips against his, and he sighed deeply, squeezing his eyes closed briefly.
“God fucking dammit, you feel so good, princess.”
My legs parted as Noah’s body sunk into mine, his thrusts getting deeper and heavier. I let out another moan, “Oh- my-god-Noah.”
Words were coiled at my throat as Noah pounded into me, hands on either side of my head, his necklace dangling in my face.
“Look at me.” Noah’s voice was rough, and I stared into his eyes. He watched me with every thrust, and I mumbled a string of messy swears, my body clenching around his.
Noah’s arms wrapped around my body, pulling me up so I was positioned on top of him, but so that there was enough leverage for him to continue to thrust into me from below. This new position allowed him to penetrate me deeper and groaned with every entrance of his body into mine.
Noah grabbed the back of my neck and the middle of my back, holding me still as he fully gave himself into me before pulling me into another kiss. His mouth attached to mine hastily, bucking his hips aimlessly. Noah’s moans were almost louder than mine as he shamelessly allowed himself a pleasure.
“Mark me, Noah, show me I was always yours.” I whimpered, and Noah immediately attached to my neck, biting and sucking against the delicate skin that was pinned along my neck.
I heaved into his ear, resting my forehead on his shoulder as he held my hips, allowing myself to completely undo myself, moaning as my body reached my climax.
“Fuck me, Noah,” I panted, gripping his arms as I clenched around him, letting him thrust into me as I rode out my high.
Noah pulled my neck back to look at him again, sweat dripping across his forehead and his eyebrows furrowed in rapture, “please let me cum inside you Y/N.”
I nodded, kissing him eagerly, our saliva melding together as Noah moaned into the kiss. His body quivered as he released himself, exhaling in short breaths of satisfaction.
“Holy shit,” Noah mumbled into my neck, and I held onto him, a smile plastering itself onto my face. We sat there for a moment, panting against each other as our chests heaved, sweat attaching us together. I ran my fingers along Noah’s hair again, absorbing his handsome features, and taking him in.
He looked up at me, his eyes back to their October glow, but now replaced with a gleam of devotion. He tucked the loose strands of my H/C hair behind my ear.
I placed my lips lightly on his, “I missed you so fucking much Noah.”
“I missed you so much princess,” Noah’s hand grabbed the back of my head gently, caressing me into his chest and holding on protectively. He pulled a blanket over us as we lay together out of breath, both relishing the high of our orgasms and the story we just created together.
“I guess I thought you got too busy to be my friend,” I whispered vulnerably as we lay underneath his covers, the story we created longing against my skin.
Noah’s head rested on top of my own, and I felt his body stiffen slightly, “life has been crazy, everything is so different now. We are no longer just screaming in my garage.” He rubbed my arm, nails trailing across my skin once again.
I nodded against him in understanding, “I know. I hope you know I watched every single concert online that I could. I followed so many fan pages just to keep updated on how you were doing.”
Noah pulled me away from him softly, he looked at me with awe, “Did you really?” 
“Of course.” I looked up, smiling at him in adoration. 
“I was always hoping you’d show up again at my doorstep sometime. You have no idea how happy I am right now.” He laughed, pulling me into him again. I smiled against his chest, absorbing this moment, worried it might be my last.
“I love you, Noah Sebastian Davis.”
“I love you most Y/N Y/L/N.”
Part Two if you want more smut ;)
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devine-fem · 1 year ago
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i am BEGGING you to make that jondami ship guide. not because i need anything to make me ship them more than i already do but because they deserve to have their good moments highlighted
Jondami/Damijon shipping guide.
A collective guide to any cute moment between Jon and Damian in DC comics or motion pictures. Any moment that could make a reader like them more as a ship will be put all here in one Tumblr post.
‱ Superman (2016) Issues #10-#11
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This is the first time they meet each other and they immediately knock heads. Jon’s lighter than life personality clashes with Damian’s cold personality and they don’t seem to get along but you can tell there’s something growing behind the eye rolling and tongue clicking
 a friendship?
‱ Superman (2016) Issue #20, #21, #25, #26 (mentioned), and #43.
‱ Super Sons (2017)
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This is the first of the Super Sons series, the series is really short but gold nonetheless. No Super Sons comic that I don’t like but this one is my favorite. They still are knocking heads and refuse to call each other partners but they grow and learn to be heroes together.
‱ Adventures of the Super Sons (2018)
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They slowly start to get used to each other and this comic shows that Damian isn’t just straight up mean but is starting to somewhat ‘like’ Jon.
‱ Challenge of the Super Sons (2020)
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The last main Super Sons comics. This one is fine but I love the others so much. These comics are essential to know Jon and Damian period, it’s the main comics of each others story and in a way they are important to each others development.
‱ Batman and Superman: Battle of the Super Sons (2022)
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Now after all that reading treat yourself to a movie because Jon and Damian got their own movie. This is what started Jon and Damian for a lot of people and this is probably where a lot of you are from. This movie is great and fun. They made Damian wayyy nicer than in the comics and their friendship easier.
‱ DC Rebirth Holiday Special (2016)
Please find and read this. It’s so cute. I love it so much.
‱ Dark Nights: Metal issue #3 (2017 -2018)
They make a rock band in the beginning, its so cute.
‱ DCeased (2019)
‱ DCeased: The Unkillables (2020)
‱ DCeased: Hope at World’s End (2020)
‱ DCeased: Dead Planet (2020)
‱ DCeased: War of the Undead Gods (2022)
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This is such a good series, and story in general please read it. DC peaked with this one and its so angsty. I don’t care what comphet was happening, Jon was there for Damian like no one else. I think Damian ends up with Cassie which is weird to me because Damian has never shown interest in anyone before but I excuse it since it’s not really gonna happen again since they were in a relationship just for the story to be more high stakes and sad. Jon and Damian’s relationship was at the forefront and for comic book readers DCeased made people see the potential in Jondami.
‱ DC’s Terror Through Time (2022)
This is so cute, please read this. It’s a halloween special and they switch uniforms <3!!
‱ DC Saved by the Belle Reve (2022)
They help a nonbinary person navigate school and it’s so damn cute.
‱ The age up incident.
(Disclaimer: You can pretend this never happens and I wouldn’t blame you for doing that.) A writer named Brain Micheal Bendis comes into the writers room for DC and ages up Jon in short. The story is that Superman goes missing (He travels to War World and gets stuck there) and Jor-El comes back to meet Jon and he takes him on a trip to explore space, then they get trapped in a wormhole, Jon gets stuck on Earth-3 and has to fight Ultraman. He’s stuck in a volcano for five or six years and becomes seventeen (we think) when he comes back. This was sad to me because it took away all the potential interactions for Jon and our ability to see him grow up, it was rushed and purposely so. Jon takes up the title of Superman somehow and starts to date some guy named “Jay Nakamura.”
‱ Superman: Son of Kal-El (2021) Issues: #1, #6, #14, and #15.
He does get a boyfriend here and I think it’s amazing the fact he simply gets a boyfriend but no one really likes his bf so
 and the are real reasons why Jay as a character is problematic BUT if you just don't want to see him with someone else than every time you see a pink haired twink, quickly skip.
‱ Adventures of Superman: Jon Kent
‱ Super Sons (2017) Special
This is them reuniting after the age up and it shows how Damian reacts to it. I can’t actually find this and if anyone can please let me know where it is. I can only find bits and pieces of it scattered across the internet. All you need to know is that he doesn’t like the age up anymore than us since he says “I miss my friend.” which is really sad to me because the age up ultimately really hurts what people like about their dynamic as well as tarnish Jon’s character almost completely.
UPDATE: found it, it got attached to
‱ Dark Crisis (2022) till Issue #5
This is fine, after issue four Jon and Damian are not there anymore and if you read half the story just for jon and damian you might as well finish it.
‱ Green Lantern: Blackstars (2019) issue #2
They hug here. You’re welcome.
‱ Action Comics (2016) issue #1030
This is the best thing to come from the age up. This is so cute of them.
‱ Teen Titans (2016) Issue #43, #45, and #46
i didnt really like this, im not gonna lie but it has some damian and jon interaction worth noting with jon being protective over damian.
‱ Flash (2016) Issue #797
jon defending damian. this is such a cute moment for them. jon talks damian up and says how hes the strongest person he knows and how hes misunderstood.
‱ Legion of Super Heroes (2019) Issue #2 & #3
dont read this. its rlly bad but this is full of jon being the number one damian apologist, quality jondsmi moments over quantity. worth mentioning ‱ Trinity Special: World’s Finest literally them raising a child together but their ages are a bit wonkey, i still dont personally know what age either of them are supposed to be there...
DC MEETS HANNA-BARBERA - Super Sons x Dynomutt
I’d say they aren’t exactly written right, well over all they are but their personalities are more relaxed and they care about each other a lot and will go out of their way to make sure the other is okay and protect them from danger, make them laugh etc, theres nothing wrong with this, its really cute but you can tell its not the typical jon and damian writers is all. I like it.
‱ Dark Crisis: The Dark Academy (2023)
‱ Wonder Woman (2016) Issue #800
- Fandom
Artist that draw Jon and Damian:
(I don’t know any of these accounts intimately so if they’re problematic in any way than I am sorry in advance)
Sheiya Vlad
Pechaghtlecha
Corinthianrm0
Hobiiiebrown
spider-jaysart
arunneronthird
Twitter
Hokke
Gozer
@_1209E
YouTube
Justice Lords Animation
Japanese Animation
Super Sons Meme Animation
- Fanfics
Trust fall by Ididloveyou_once
Those Who Wait by InsaneTrollLogic
moving in stereo by TheResurrectionist
Reasons to Not Fall in Love by nanami
Growing Pains
These are fics I read and liked, I don’t have much. I don’t read a lot of Jondami fan fiction so I insist that you recommend your own fanfiction in the comments. (Don’t hate me for the self promo)
- Music (A silly lil playlist I made for them)
END
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robbie-wallis · 7 months ago
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I need to vent about Watcher, endure it if you can
Relax, this isn't a parasocial thing, but it is a long ass post, which suits me as a long ass human.
I need an outlet to discuss the terrible business decision Watcher has made by announcing their plan to leave YouTube, and this long-forgotten Tumblr account reached from its grave to grab at my ankle.
If you didn't see their video, good for you. It's extremely cringe-worthy in its sentimentality and editing, with blurry shots, pensive pauses and obligatory sad piano.
But at least there's no f'ing Ukulele.
Although, I think we might get the Ukulele in a few months.
Even though anyone who reads this is probably familiar with what the "Ghoul Boys" have done, I feel as though I need to add a little history.
WATCHER HISTORY
You can skip this part if you've been obsessively following the shenanigans, this is for the noobs who were never a "shaniac" or a "boogara".
Shane Madej and Ryan Bergara used to work at Buzzfeed. They hosted the successful Buzzfeed Unsolved shows. In 2019 they followed in the footsteps of the Try Guys and Safia Nygaaard and left Buzzfeed to create their own YouTube channel named "Watcher".
They brought along Steven Lim, another Buzzfeed person who is most known for the "Worth It" series. This series followed Lim and his friend/s spending obscene amounts of money on obscenely overpriced and indulgent products.
Think of it as being similar to the $100 V's $10,000 Sidemen content, only without the self-awareness and British "bad lads" humor.
Notably, even the Sidemen seem to have cut back on those adventures, perhaps understanding how bad it looks when so many people are struggling to pay their essential bills.
Steven became the CEO of Watcher while Shane and Ryan continued to create and present for the new channel.
They were wildly successful by YouTube standards. At the time of their self-spanking on Friday they were close to achieving 3 million subscribers, in just 4 years, based on basically only 2 cornerstone shows. If Social Blade is still a reasonably trusted source in everything but estimating income, they were gaining thousands of new subscribers every week.
Their most successful shows were Ghost Files, Puppet History, Too Many Spirits and Mystery Files.
Ghost Files is the only one of these shows which requires heavy investment, travel, a large crew and impressive production costs. These videos are shot on-location and require a lot of work. The rest are basically Good Mythical Morning style, just the two hosts and their banter.
Aside from Ghost Files, their content could be created with 3 cameras, 2 lapel mics and a good editor.
They were massively successful, solely because of Ryan and Shane.
THE DEMISE
So, what did they do on Friday 19th April? They decided to announce the launch of their own subscription platform.
Not a Patreon for extra content, behind-the-scenes, audience interaction etc, (they already had a Patreon with 6,000 paying subscribers earning them at least $50k a month), but a bespoke streaming platform which looks like a clone of Netflix.
The cost is $5.99 a month, or $60 a year.
Comparable to Netflix.
And by that I mean the price is comparable to Netflix while the content is comparable to a 4 year old YouTube channel.
Don't get me wrong, their production quality is incredible. The quantity, however, is not.
From the end of May viewers will have to pay to be a subscriber on their own platform in order to watch their shows.
They'll still be posting their trailers on YouTube, and the first episodes of new shows, but to watch it all you'll have to pay up or miss out.
Edited to add: Variety originally reported the Watcher crew were planning to remove all their existing content from YouTube to monetize it on their own platform. It's since been confirmed they will not be removing their old content. Fans are undecided whether this was a back-track after the announcement or a misunderstanding by Variety. You be the judge.
Of course, they're entitled to do this. They are creating a product and you can either enjoy it or not. No one is entitled to see it, for free, whenever they like.
Why did they do this?
Half of the sombre video gushes about their "humble beginnings" as "struggling young guys in a big harsh world", which comes across as extremely self-indulgent and ego-stroking.
A quarter of it explains how insanely successful they've been on YouTube and how this is all thanks to the fans who stuck with them after Buzzfeed, how it's allowed them to hire 25 people, how it's given them the freedom to create what they enjoy making and what the viewers want to see, and - most importantly - how it's allowed them to increase production quality on Ghost Files.
The final quarter of the video explains that this isn't good enough, the quality isn't high enough, the finish not glossy enough, it's not "TV caliber" enough! They want more, they need more, you have to give them more, mostly (apparently) because their CEO Steven Lim wants to bring back his show where he flies around the world with his bestie sipping Champagne and eating gold-leaf-covered lobster.
In short, they want more money to make even bigger things, even though their audience never asked for that.
WHY IT WILL NOT WORK
Oh my goodness, this is going to be a ride so strap in.
I'm not a YouTube creator so there are a lot of things I do not know. Having said that, I know a little about business.
This ain't Buzzfeed, y'all
Watcher became successful because of Ryan and Shane. It was their friendship, their personalities, and the content we loved to watch featuring them at Buzzfeed, that brought us along for the ride.
The audience they poached from Buzzfeed is there for them and Ghost Files. It's not there for Steven Lim and "Worth It". His show worked under the Buzzfeed umbrella only because they had numerous sub-categories in that community to support it.
The Try Guys left and created their own channel from their Buzzfeed fans.
Safia Nygaard left and created her own channel from her Buzzfeed fans.
Shane and Ryan left and created Watcher from their Buzzfeed fans.
Steven Lim left and became the CEO of Watcher. He didn't take his audience with him.
The audience of Watcher is not the audience of "watch me fly around the word with my pal and spend $100K on hand-reared, Whiskey marinaded, diamond-encrusted Kobe steak".
And... IN THIS ECONOMY?
Steven chose to become a CEO instead of a presenter. He's missed the opportunity to take that Buzzfeed audience with him.
This is made clear by the Watcher channel itself. Their "man eats food" content rarely breaks 500K views while their Ghost Files breaks 2 million consistently.
If a million of their viewers followed them from Buzzfeed to Watcher, the other 2 million have joined them since, based almost entirely on their spoopy content.
Not only did they base their channel on this genre and format, they have distilled their audience further ever since the creation of their channel and no matter how hard they try to diversify into "man eats food" it's just not working.
This ain't Netflix, y'all
As mentioned, the $5.99 charge is comparable to Netflix and just about every other streaming platform. Only Watcher can't give you even 5% of what a competing platform can offer for that price.
Other platforms also tailor their content and their pricing based on geographical location and localized economics.
You're paying far less than $5.99 a month if you live in an economy where the median household income is $300 a month. YouTube has a global audience. Their subscribers don't all live in a stable economy where $5.99 is considered disposable income.
We don't know the numbers, but I would guess only 60% of their subscribers are based in the USA, Canada, and the UK.
Even for those who do live in a stable economy, their audience is predominantly young adults and students. Most young adults are currently facing the reality that they will possibly never own their own home, they're living day-to-day trying to budget.
They've instantly priced-out a large % of their audience.
I confidently predict that diehard fans who can't see anything wrong with this will sign up for $5.99 a month, binge watch for a couple of weeks, realize there's no new spoopy content and cancel.
They'll come back when a full season of Ghost Files has arrived, pay again, binge it and leave.
Steven Lim thinks they're gonna get $5.99 a month, every month, from thousands of subscribers. In reality they're going to get maybe $12 a year, from people signing up to binge watch what they want, then leaving.
This will then decline naturally as attention wanes during the months where there is no spoopy.
This ain't good marketing, y'all
They're going to be posting "trailers and season pilots" on YouTube.
Sure, I bet YouTube is gonna be totes okay with a channel doing nothing but trying to hijack traffic for an external site.
Posting nothing but trailers and season premiers will mean maybe one full video per month during busy seasons. That's not enough to remain relevant for the algorithm.
If 80% of those posts are also just trailers saying "leave YouTube and come here", the channel will be smacked down quicker than a crypto scam using an AI generated Elongated Muskrat.
Their channel was growing steadily, but that was with full content regularly posted. When the schedule drops off, and when most of it is considered spammy by YouTube, it's going to collapse like a flan in a cupboard.
A streaming platform needs a constant flow of new subscribers just to replace the gradual drop-off (maybe ask Rooster Teeth about that). When your global audience at YouTube is gone, where are those new subscribers coming from?
The platform is also an additional overhead. It's going to cost thousands a month to keep the servers going.
This ain't good financial management, y'all
I don't know if they've already spent hundreds of thousands of $s on Lim's "men eat food" gamble, but I suspect they have.
I know they have spent hundreds of thousands of $s on a new season of Ghost Files, flying to the UK to host live events while filming those episodes.
This means they've over-extended their finances just at the moment where they've cratered their opportunities to see a return on investment.
Just that, on its own, is enough to destroy a production company.
They do not need 25 employees any more than I need an editor and proof-reader for this long ass post.
They do not need a production studio in Hollywood any more than I needed an office to write this.
They do not need to spend tens of thousands of $s on glossy graphics that appear on screen for maybe 4 seconds in one episode any more than I needed to add screengrabs to this painfully long essay.
By leaving YouTube they've lost:
Adsense revenue (which might not be much on a per-video basis but adds up with a back catalogue over years of productions)
Sponsorship deals, which allegedly contributes almost 50% of their annual revenue.
Merch sales, which is about to crash if the only people they can promote merch to are already paying per month in their smaller ecosystem.
Patreon. Why would someone pay $5.99 twice, for the same or less content?
And they've abandoned all of this for maybe a few thousand people who will probably end up paying just $12 a year when a new spoopy season arrives for them to binge.
I'm no Will Hunting, but no matter how hard I try to make the numbers work they just don't, and I don't need Robin Williams to tell me it's not my fault.
This ain't nice, y'all
Some of you are feeling like Ned's wife right now, and some of you will have no idea what that's in reference to.
Most of you will hate that I made that reference more than you hated the SNL skit.
I get it.
Maybe the worst part about all of his, from a viewer's perspective, is the dismissive nature of their sign-off.
They didn't mention the Patreon members once, not one single time in the whole video. It's like they consider the Patreon "too YouTube". They're the deformed cousin locked in the attic. They're the relative who wasn't invited to the wedding because they can't afford a Tom Ford suit. They're the colleague who isn't invited to the staff night out because they only work in accounting and no one has anything in common with Janice anyway.
These are diehard fans who were actually paying them extra to support them and enjoy a little bonus behind the scenes, and the boys didn't even consider them worthy of an utterance.
They also finished with "If you don't follow us and pay up it's been real, peace out". I'm paraphrasing, but that's basically what it was.
They spent so much of the video saying how awesome and great it was that the fans and YouTube got them to this point, but they didn't thank their Patreon members, and they ended with a blunt suggestion that if you don't follow them and pay more then you're not a real fan anyway and they don't really need you.
"Thanks for getting us here, sucks to be you, bye now!"
You made them wealthy, you helped them hire 25 people, you helped them increase production value to "TV caliber" even though you didn't ask for that, but your job is done and now you're superfluous. Only the real fans are wanted.
In the words of the great George Carlin - "It's a big club, and you ain't in it".
They're okay losing the vast majority of the people who got them here if a few thousand of those are comfortable enough to be able to pay $60 a year for a YouTube channel.
Can it get worse? Sure!
We've had a weekend to enjoy the constant heat of this bonfire and it's predictably worsened with each hour of silence from the company and its employees.
The fact that they haven't back-tracked, despite almost unanimous agreement that this is badder than the baddest thing that could happen to their company, suggests they're okay with it.
Consensus seems to be that they knew it would be this bad, and they're cool. They predicted 90% of people would scream "Boo to you good sirs! Boo indeed!" and they could still survive on the 10% who don't see a problem here.
The lack of response reinforces the narrative that they're totally fine with discarding almost their entire audience if they can just squeeze the cash they need out of whoever is left.
This ain't fixable, y'all (maybe)
Note: I don't want this to be mean, but it's going to sound a little bitchy no matter how I try to say it.
If they'd brought out the Ukulele on Saturday, or even teased Ukulele's on their socials before putting out a video on Sunday, they probably could have survived this with much hand-wringing and a little groveling.
But now I think they've grilled this Kobe steak for far too long.
They've lost 100K subscribers, and counting. The venom among Patreon members is allegedly worse than the public comments section under the video, which is startling. Dozens of YouTubers are torching them harder than a $100 crÚme brûlée.
People are scraping their channel content in case it's nuked.
Shane "eat the rich" Madej's sentiments over the last few years look disingenuous, to say the least. To shamelessly steal someone else's comment: "Imagine being all 'eat the rich' right before throwing yourself on the plate". He's silent while his McMansion burns down, at his own hands. "Why not!?" indeed.
Steven "I drive a Tesla" Lim's socials now make him look like a tech-bro try-hard and his use of words like "early adopter" and "soft launch" in the video only compound the belief that this was all his brainchild. He is the CEO, and that comes with responsibility and the associated blame. You can't steer the ship into the Bermuda Triangle and then disappear without looking like the bad guy.
Okay, you can disappear, but that convoluted metaphor is a mystery for someone else to solve.
Ryan "TV caliber" Bergara now sounds like an elitist who thinks YouTube is "too pedestrian" for his big plans, not big enough to meet his artistic vision. You see, he's more James Cameron, while YouTube is more like your student film club. He's grown beyond this pesky platform with billions of daily hits offering exponential growth with almost zero financial risk.
Even if they released a video today admitting they messed up big time it's still going to be hard to get the taste of this Ghost Pepper Warhead out of the collective mouth of their viewers.
This hasn't just burned their shared brand, it's singed their individual reputations among an audience upon which their careers rely.
What they should have done, on Saturday, is release a video (Ukulele or no) confessing their error. They should have announced their new platform will instead just be a bigger and better Patreon, with early access to everything, behind-the-scenes content, extra features, audience interaction etc.
They should have reversed to make clear their YouTube channel will stay the priority, their main source of revenue, but that you could get more on their own platform if you want it.
And, maybe, over time, people will pay for that. If they grow their channel to 6 million subscribers in the next 4 years there will be a couple hundred thousand of them willing and able to pay $5.99 a month for 8 years of shows, 8 years of behind the scenes content, 8 years of community involvement and regular early access to new episodes.
Maybe then they could try out their "privileged guys eat expensive food in expensive places" show and see how it does? Maybe a majority of people won't be living on the cusp of poverty by then and it won't look as tone-deaf as a 13 year old YouTuber trying to cover Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah"? Maybe then they could hire another 50 people and make Bergara's "TV caliber" (I still don't know exactly what that means) game shows and reboots?
The clock has been ticking since they hit that "publish" button on their career ending video, but that clock is about to count down to zero and silence will permeate throughout their previously lively community.
That 1980s basement set needed someone crying in the corner, right?
The problem is, their own platform is not a terrible idea. Really, it's not the worst thing they could do. The badness came in the timing, the switch, the middle finger and the f you. They could have released this as an extra, their own Patreon alternative, waited, developed it over time into something sustainable and established.
They could still try to do that and hope this dark chapter is forgotten.
Maybe I'm wrong? Maybe Lim is a financial genius with more skill than the management of Rooster Teeth and their corporate parent company combined? Maybe this gamble will be wildly successful despite all streaming services down-sizing or just going bankrupt? Maybe they won't be back on YouTube in 3-6 months begging for views after having to lay off 20 of their employees?
I know this... if I were one of those 25 employees blind faith would not be enough to stop me from looking for another job.
I suppose this will, for now, remain... a mystery.
EDIT:
I'm not writing another essay about this, but I'm glad to see they've backtracked and made the right choice to use WatcherTV as any sane creator would - to host early access and exclusive content in addition to their YouTube channel.
Over time, while promoting it in every video, building up that trust and fan base, it can be a secure and long-term financial bonus helping them to expand their business incrementally as finances allow.
Why this wasn't the plan all along is anyone's guess. Gambling everything on this was never the sane decision.
I still think they need to scale back on costs. I still think the food content is not currently a viable source of income while being a serious drain on resources. I still think they need to stop hiring all their friends and they need to hire one person who doesn't have personal relationships with everyone there and can make the tough business decisions.
No one likes firing people, it's ten times worse when it's a friend. But this is a reality of business and just wishing it wasn't so isn't going to make it go away. It would be awesome if we could all run a business where we can hire all our friends and family, never have to rely on any outside funding, make whatever we want, make a great living in one of the most expensive cities in the world and continue to grow.
That's just not the reality.
Their apology was genuine, in my opinion. I just hope they can work out the right financial balance.
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damagedcoda6669 · 6 months ago
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omw 2 getting diagnosed w POTS :3
is tumblr just my designated place 4 mental health/disability posting now????? yes. thagts vry tumblr.
so i went 2 the ER twice earlier this year becuz of extreme lightheadedness after standing up 2 the point of almost passing out, and i got a referral 2 a cardiologist becuz they noticed irregularities w my heartrate on the ekg. it took so much time waiting and i was so upset and angry that i had 2 wait so long, but i had my first appointment 2day!!!
ive known since my second ER visit that i probably have POTS, so it was EXTREMELY FUNNY when the assistant had me lay down 4 five minutes and then stand up, and after taking my heartrate the first thing he said was "have u ever heard of smth called POTS" LOLZERSSSS (MY HEARTRATE WENT UP 2 FUCKING 140 BTW)
then the cardiologist came in and the first thing she said was smth like "have u heard of POTS" ITS 2 OBVIOUS. IM THE POTS MAN. basically she told me that its PROBABLY pots but that she wants 2 rule it out becuz theres no cure and im so young n healthy n beautiful and she doesnt want me 2 have pots (she was so sweet :( and so im gonna have 2 get an echocardiogram and get bloodwork done and wear a heart monitor 4 two weeks
kinda excited 2 find out whats wrong w my fucked up heart!!! i think if i do end up having pots im gonna look in2 getting a wheelchair and try 2 adjust 2 it (i tried out one of the public wheelchairs at walmart recently and i was so embarrassed 😭 but i need 2 get over it becuz using a wheelchair is gonna be SO MUCH easier than walking I NEED 2 GET OVER IT NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW)
the heart monitor is gonna make me feel liek joseph w the ring around his aorta.. /JOJO REF
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floofeh-purpi · 5 months ago
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Getting isekai'd?! (Part 2)
Sagau! Genshin Fatui x Gn! Reader (ft. Your bsf)
Warnings: Im too lazy to put anything here rn...
『Beloved fluffball/s mentioned below! 💜』
@justmare
◇
You can tell me if you wanna be tagged in the next part :)
Sidenote: Someone please teach me how links wpek in tumblr plesae đŸ€ 
Part 1 here :>
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★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆
The harbingers we're having a meeting with, well, y'know... the usual and boring ass stuff with the Tsaritsa. That is until they were interrupted by a group of fatui agents, who panted as they almost unintentionally broke the door.
"P-pardon us for the interruption. Y-your Majesty." A female agent stammered out. "B-but this is... urgent."
*Insert them telling their surperiors that they spotted someone (you ofc) that looked like their Grace and that the person was with another person and a wolf-looking creature (they dont know its your dog ok đŸ˜­đŸ€š) *
"Someone that looks like... Our Grace? Are you certain?"
"Yes. Your Majesty."
★
"The jacket's nice..." You awkwardly said out of the blue as d/n happily walked around the snowy terrain, his/her paws making a faint yet satistfying crunch on the snow as he/she walked, with a leash much to the poor doggo's dismay (cus bro this huge baby loves running around without a leash)
"Awh, thanks n/n (nickname)" Your bsf answered in a sing-song tone.
"Remember the time we met bro?" (You call your bsf bro regardless of their gender, they dont mind lol)
"Yeh, lol."
♀ (story of when you guys met cus idk what to put here)
You guys met in around 1st year high school when your teacher said that their is an art competition coming up and everyone is to be partnered up with another student in a different section.
Oh, how faith was feeling generous that day, by making the teacher partner you with y/b/f/n... Though, you had to admit, it was kinda awkward at first...
"Yo."
"Yo."
"So like, whats your name bro? You seem cool."
"Name's y/n."
"Ohmigash nice name. My name's y/b/f/n, wanna be friends?"
"Sure brooo"
Just as when as your new friend tried to extend their arm for a handshake, they may have accidentally spilt some paint with their arm. Oops.
"Oh shitttt..." You cursed in your head.
"Oh nah, we is cooked. 😱"
Yeah yall got a not-so-fun scolding for 2 hours by the trainer.
♀ (end of story lmao)
"Yo, I think d/n is thirsty rn..." Your friend pointed at the panting husky. Poor cutie patootie. You thought before you realizing you didnt bring water with you. "Ah damn, I didnt bring water, we gotta go back now. Sorry bud." You apologized to d/n who was still panting. Give him/her water you little shi-
★
After you guys FINALLY arrived back to your home, you immediatly opened the door and got some water for d/n.
"There y'go, you cutie patootie of a dog." You cooed as you petted d/n, who was drinking water happily.
★
"Where is this... person, you say?" The Captain crossed his arms.
"We last spotted them near a house, sir. They were with someone else and a creature that appeared to be a wolf of sorts."
"Hm~? A house~?" Columbina asked in her soft, sing-song voice.
"Yes mam."
After that the Tsaritsa ordered everyone, the harbingers included (for you simps), to go to this house and see if its actually their creator or nah.
The end.
Sike bitch.
D/n fell asleep on his/her bed. Bruh.
You guys sat down on the couch, an awkward silence could be felt between you, Though it was cutted off by a knock on your door.
"Ima go get it."
"Bruh sure, ima head into my room if you need me." You gave y/b/f/n a thumbs up before going up the stairs. Unaware of the big surprise thats coming to you. Both of you.
☆
Posted: June 28, 2024. 11:48am.
【Part 3】
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saint-end · 1 month ago
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✩ [email protected] ✩ Hello!! I'm doing a sale as thanks for all the support this year and for xmas money! (help) This sale will go on until November 29 2024 and will be my 1st priority for fast completion. Unlimited per person. ✩ Reblogs and shares are very appreciated! ✩ read below before contacting me!
I will assume you have read this in its entirety when you contact me! Headshot will be something in between a rough and full render, in 1:1 ratio. Base price is 20 euros. add-on prices: ✩ additional character +50% price ✩ +5£/per big edit (you will receive the commission after payment) ✩ no refunds, minor adjustments are free. Full payment upfront via ko-fi (This is for personal use only, you are not allowed to resale, use for commercial gain in any way, or use for AI + NFT.) ✩ Please provide clear references for your character. Photo references + insp boards + written descriptions is OK!! ✩ Preference for posing, color palette, motifs is very welcome! ✩ In order to speed up the commissions there will be no mid-checks unless i feel unsure about something. If this is something you want, please feel free to ask for it! ✩ I accept new comms in batches as i finish up the previous ones. I will call out what day i respond on my tumblr and bsky. ✩ Once we have agreed and it's been paid in full, i will start the commission. ✩ I work in order of payment, if you want to know where you are in the queue, email me! In an effort to speed things up i will minimize contact as much as possible, but will always answer any questions from paid clients. Don't hesitate to ask! will do: fanart, ocs, dnd, vampire, rpg, ship art (queer and straight), self-ship, slight gore and nudity, mostly anything is OK! will not: anything explicit, furry, mecha, (<-i do not have the skillsTvT) anything bigoted Please note that if you have AI in your references you will be ignored and automatically denied. If you think you have been denied and know for sure you do not have AI in your references, you have to provide proof.
✩ First time commissioning and unsure of the process? Send me an email with the commission request of what you want including character + refs -> we both agree -> payment -> i create it and send it to you! If there are any anxieties or confusion, please let me know and i will do my best to explain and make it a safe and fun experience for us both. I'm a very nice person and my fists are only for creeps and bigots! Cringe is not real!! I love making art for people and anyone is welcome here! <3 [email protected] For any questions or inquiries, feel free to email me! Yay!
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PEACE AND LOVE MY FRIENDS!!!!!!!! thank you!! Here you can browse completed commissions from this sale!
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teethondafloor · 1 year ago
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Bill Kaulitz x gn!reader ~ Taking off Bill's makeup after a show.
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________.✼.________
Year : 2006
Summary --
You and Bill have been best friends for over three years now and are completely inseparable. You two are partners in crime, ready to mock and poke fun at each other any chance you get, and even more ready to comfort each other right after. Tonight, the band happens to have a gig in your hometown, where you and Bill first met. You attend the concert and text Bill after, thrilled by the band's electric performance, when Bill has other plans in mind...
Bill Kaulitz x gn!reader
Cute friends to lovers arc
Warnings --
basic fluff (touching, kissing, etc)
Note --
This took me way too long to write but IM SO EXCITED TO POST IT AA. this is my first tumblr fanfic (I'm sadly a wattpad user) so sorry if it's bad :D
________.✼.________
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{{y/n}} : dude! That was awesom! You rocked!
{{BILL}} : I hope. My throat hurts lol. Where r u?
{{y/n}} : headin home. U?
{{BILL}} : WTF no! I want to c u b4 u leave!
{{y/n}} : cope. Where r u??
{{BILL}} : backstage dressing room. I can sneak you in!
{{y/n}} : I will get caught!
{{BILL}} : no! I am comin for u. Where r u?
{{y/n}} : at the exit doors :P.
{{BILL}} : STAY.
{{y/n}} : OK.
________.✼.________
Standing near the exit doors of the venue, I wait for Bill to emerge from his post-show hideaway as I look around the empty room, which just moments ago was overflowing with screaming fans. I gaze up at the dim lights above, now painting the room in a slight yellow wash which my eyes peer at weakly after standing in the dark for almost 3 hours. The air-con is blasted through the room, the cool air brushing up against my bare arms and slapping me in my face momentarily as it passes me and continues lingering around the room.
After spending some time taking in my surroundings, I snap out of my thoughts and feel the hair on my arms rise, reacting to the cool air circling the area. At the other side of the room near the stage, I hear a sudden rummaging sound coming from the corner, casted with a dark shadow. I squint my eyes a little, wondering if it's Bill that's making all the noise. From the loud clanks and banging sounds, I can tell that the person is struggling through their journey. Must be him, I smile to myself. I slide my hands into my front jean pockets, continuously glancing over to the security who are stood by the doors, surprised that they don't hear the ruckus. I look back at the noise, which now grows fainter as I hear soft footsteps tiptoeing into the concert venue.
As I hear this, I notice a tall, dark figure slowly emerging from the dark corner, the black fog lurking behind it. I smile and take my hands out of my pockets, knowing that its Bill from his giant spiky hair sprouting from his head, which is the first thing I see as he steps into the room. He takes a few light steps closer, just enough to keep himself hidden from the security guards scouring around the area. As he comes closer, his face is lit up by the soft lights above us, making the ends of his dark hair glow beneath the light, and revealing his wide smile as he sees me at last. He's so bad at sneaking around, I scoff gently.
Not wanting to be seen by the employees, Bill stays behind the stage and out of their sight. I look up and see as he nods to the ground beneath him, signalling me to walk over to him. My eyes widen and I look over to the security, trying to communicate to Bill that I can't just walk up to him without being stopped. A puzzled look washes over his face and he bites the inside of his cheek, thinking. I point at the watch that's tied to my wrist, knowing that the doors will soon close for the night and I will be kicked out of the building if we don't hurry. Bill looks down at the ground before turning back to me and nodding, determined to get me backstage with him. At once, He runs back into the black void behind him, leaving me alone in the room again. I inch forward a little, wanting to run after him, before I stop myself, trusting that he has a plan.
One of the security guards at the doors notices me when I shuffle forward and calls to me form afar. "Excuse me, we need you to leave right now." Shit, I think. I freeze up for a second as he calls to me, glancing over to the corner for any sign of Bill one last time. Agitated that he fled, I look down at the floor and back at the guard. "Yeah sorry, I thought I lost something." I lie as an excuse for my long stay. Just as I'm about to take my first step towards the exit, all of the lights in the room shut off by the click of a switch, the dark swallowing everything and everyone in the room. All of the sudden, I hear firm and heavy footsteps running towards me from the opposite side of the room. Before I can even put my other foot on the ground, the footsteps are cut off and I feel as someone grabs my hand and pulls me, running back with me latched onto them. As I feel their hand in mine, I instantly know it's Bill, his many bracelets which cover half of his forearm rubbing up against my wrist as we sprint ahead and disappear behind the stage. The security guard is left clueless when the lights shut off, and speaks to the black void, only getting the sound of his own echo in response "...did you find what you were looking for? Excuse me?..."
________.✼.________
With a tight grip on my hand, Bill leads me into a tight alleyway, between the back of the stage and the dressing room which he climbed through before. The space is shielded from any light and trashed with clutter from previous bands performing at the venue. We giggle as we stop before walking through it. "Hey" he says with a smile, huffing from laugher. I can tell he is facing me, even in the complete darkness that surrounds us. "Hey" I say, lightly breathless from the excitement. We both peer through the tight gap, trying to spot an obstacle to look out for from afar, however, the shade absorbs any object inside, turning them invisible. I hear Bill turn to me again, his breath on my forehead. "Follow me, come on!" He giggles as he lifts up our hands which are still in a warm clasp. "Go!" I whisper whilst still laughing, nudging him forward playfully. Bill starts taking long and cautious steps through the alleyway, hesitating a little when he hits any object beneath us. I follow his lead, being cautious myself. I run my hand across the wall as we walk to keep myself balanced. Halfway through the black tunnel, I hear as Bill kicks an object at his feet. Still walking, I bump into his back, causing me to flinch a little. "Dude. what is it?" I whisper to him. I hear Bill rummaging gently through the junk with his feet, clearing a path for us to walk through. He laughs "I don't know, it scared the shit out of me" We both try and hold in our laughter and continue through the gap.
As we reach the end of the alley, a streak of light peers through a crack in the wall, revealing some of the junk that is spread out on the ground around us: Magazines, cigarettes, a white laced bra....I turn my head to the back of Bill's as I speak. "What is this? your sex dungeon?" I say, smiling with sarcasm in my voice. I hear Bill scoff and smile. "If it is, it's definitely not mine." We both giggle quietly. At last, we reach the end and I step back as Bill lets go of my hand and starts messing with the crack in the wall, which to my surprise, turns out to be a secret doorway to the venue's dressing room. He pushes on the heavy object which blocks the doorway, sliding his fingers under it, trying to shuffle it to the side. Seeing him struggle, I step forward and push the object forward to help, successfully forcing it out of the way.
Before stepping into the dressing room, we take a minute to catch our breaths; I lean on the wall next to me, and look at Bill as he pants. We lock eyes and burst into quiet laughter, still a little breathless. "I need to see this stupid fucking room" I say, smiling. I step away from the wall and finally enter the dressing room. The overhead lights gleam, almost blinding me as I step in, forcing me to raise my hand and shield my eyes from them. I look around, never had been backstage of a concert venue before.
A faint smell of cheap makeup and pungent nail polish lingers in the room, the sharp chemical scent burning my nostrils as I inhale it. I admire the lit up mirrors lined up along the wall, covered in stickers left behind by other musicians however long ago. Bill's and his bandmates' belongings are spread across the room, creating a small pile of clothes and bags on a large bean bag, pushed into the corner of the room. "Where are the others?" I say, referring to his bandmates. I turn my head to look back at Bill who steps into the room with his head titled down, before looking around the room himself. "They're at some party right now." He slides his hands into his pockets.
"They went without you?" I scrunch my eyebrows in confusion, knowing Tom would not leave him out like this. "no no...I didn't want to go...I don't even know where it is, and I'm exhausted." He says as he stretches his arms out gently. "Dude!" I exclaim "We could've went there!" I punch him on the shoulder playfully, causing him to shoot his hands up to his face in defence. "You can go! I'm not going" He says with a judgemental look, teasing.
I hover around the room and view the splash of graffiti on one of the walls, seeing the signatures of hundreds of bands and musicians from the past, piled on top of each other into a barely legible scribble. "How did you even find the sex dungeon?" I'm still looking at the wall when he takes off his leather jacket and throws it at me without warning, as he says with a smile "I got bored waiting for Gustav to set up." a look of surprise bursts onto my face as I catch the jacket in my hands, which I then throw onto the pile with the rest of their junk, laughing.
"So, how do you like my dressing room?" He gestures his arms, showcasing the space and waits for my response. "You are really living the life here...I mean damn. "My eyes follow the walls, stopping to observe the space again. I raise my eyebrows. "You can't help but make it a shithole though." I say sarcastically, picking up a pair of boxer shorts I saw hanging from a chair next to me. He gasps and laughs, stepping towards me and snatching his boxers from my hands before throwing them onto the pile in the corner. I snicker when I see his red cheeks, blushing furiously from embarrassment as I infect him with my laughter. "Shut up! They're gonna hear us in here!" He whispers with a smile stretched wide across his face, still blushing. He walks over to me and gently grabs me by my shoulders, shaking me to stop me from laughing. As he holds me, I put my hand up to my mouth, covering it and muffling out the sounds of my giggles. I then push him away playfully, to which he steps back. "Stop touching everything, you're gonna break something." He whispers in a joking tone.
"Especially not your trunks." I huffed from laughter. Bill blinks slowly, visibly annoyed from my teasing. "I'm serious though, don't break anything because they'll make you pay for it." I notice how he avoids my eyes and tries to change the subject. "Oh come on...I'm not that clumsy. They should make you guys pay for trashing this room so bad." I smile. He looks down, smiling at my comment, his red cheeks growing fainter.
Bill walks over to the vanity across from us, cluttered with his makeup and endless hair products. He sits down, adjusts himself on the chair slightly and looks into the mirror, which reveals a tired face, caked in makeup and hairspray, looking back at him. I walk over to him and sit on the counter next to the mirror, kicking my feet which hang from the tall surface. I take a moment to look at him, as the vanity's warm lights glimmer in his eyes.
"The concert was unreal." I say, breaking the thin silence between us. "I'm glad you came back to play here. You're everything anyone talks about round here since you got so famous." I look over to him, rubbing my arm that is propping me up on the table. I feel a little bitter-sweet about Bill's fame. On one hand I am so proud of what him and the boys have accomplished, in like what...a year? It's insane. Though, I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss just hanging out. Being able to sit for hours and do nothing together. They always have something to do now, with no time to sit in the moment. The guilt of this pools inside me. It makes me feel like a brick wall that's cutting him off on his path. My biggest fear however, is Bill not knowing how to break down this wall, quietly tolerating my burden instead. "Really? I noticed so many people from school there, I really didn't want to fuck up." He says, now looking up at me with his head resting on his palm. "I'm pretty sure I saw Leon all the way at the back, poor guy got pushed out of the crowd." We laugh.
"As much as I like traveling around and playing, this feels better. I can't explain it." He smiles as he begins to stumble over his words. "I don't know, it only feels right to perform here you know?" He looks to me.
"Nah I get you, and we're glad you did." I smile at him and my eyes are suddenly drawn to his eye makeup, now rubbing off on his cheeks after every blink. "What?" He says and quickly turns to the mirror, now seeing his smudged eyeshadow. His eyes widen in shock, seeing how messy he looks after a show. "Dude, you look insane." I burst out laughing, placing my hand over my mouth as I holler. "Shut up!" He groans, laughing with me "I'm too tired for this".
I control my laughter and wait a moment before nudging one of the chairs at the vanity with my leg, sliding it closer to Bill. I hop onto it, now directly facing him. "Come here." I say. He turns away from the mirror as I grab a dry cotton pad from a pack on his desk and drip some makeup remover onto it, watching it absorb the chemicals. He inches towards me, pushing his hair away from his face to help me, and closing his eyes slowly as the cotton pad touches his cheek, working away at his pale foundation. We sit in silence for a few seconds, enjoying each others company while I scrub at the cosmetics, washing away the excitement and fatigue of the long night that has soaked into it. "Did you really want to go to that party? We could still go if you're desperate." Bill says quietly, breaking the silence.
"Nah..." I whisper "I'd rather be here with you." when my hand grazes over his face, I feel a thin smile spread across his cheeks when he hears my words. He peers at me with his eyes half shut and backs away a little. "Look at you being all sappy..." he smiles.
"Shut up and give me your face." I say, taking a hold of his jaw and pulling his face closer to my reach. He lets out a short exhale, charmed by my boldness. I run the cotton pad across his face, quickly rubbing it over his lips playfully. He smiles again now with his teeth. "That was so on purpose..." He says with his eyes still sealed shut. "What?...no.." I say sarcastically.
After dirtying the cotton pad with his foundation, I grab a second one and move up to his shadowed eyes. "Keep your eyes closed...I need to sort all this out." I scoff, laughing as I poke fun at the mess painted on his eyes that has now somehow travelled up to his eyebrows. I take the pad and a wet wipe for good measure, massaging his eyelids. He swallows quietly "I've really missed you" he says out of nowhere. A little stunned, I continue cleaning him. "Me too." My tone suddenly shifts and you can hear a faint sadness in my voice. "I'm sorry I've been going away all the time, I would take you with us if I could..."
"Don't worry about it...I'm always back here if you need me anyway."
"Well I...don't want you only when I need you, I want you everywhere with me." I'm shocked by his sudden sentimentality, not really knowing how to respond since our usual way of showing love is by bullying each other until one caves in. "I know I know, that's not what I meant." I reassured him.
"I know, it's cool." he whispers "You know...sometimes I wish we wouldn't have to travel for so long, I've missed this." he pauses "Y/n...what if I stay?" He falls quiet, waiting for me to say something to fill in the silence. I look to him, a subtle face of worry crossing my face as I pull myself together. "Dude, stop." I say "Don't be stupid, this is...a crazy opportunity. Getting to travel around Europe and sing, that's nuts....don't let me hold you back...please."
"You're not "holding me back" y/n-"
I cut his sentence short "But what if I am? And you're just not realising it?...I don't want to be that." I blurt out.
"What?..." He opens his eyes, takes me by my wrists and holds me, preventing me from moving. His eyes glare at me. "No...don't do that. You're not in my way, do you understand?" His tone turns more agitated, worried that I'm giving myself a hard time because of his absence. A sudden silence falls between us like a transparent wall piling up and separating us, numbing me to his touch. This time, I'm not the wall. "Have you been worrying about this while I've been gone?" he looks to me hoping I'll say no, but already knowing the answer before the words leave his mouth. "Yeah...a little....a lot." I correct myself "You can't blame me though...I don't see you for weeks, sometimes even months. I know that's not your fault, but I'm allowed to be upset." I say, standing my ground.
"I know, it upsets me too." He lets go of my wrists and slides his hands down to mine, gently holding my hands with care. He smiles softly as he holds me, rubbing the top of my right hand with his thumbs, which makes both of us smile. We take time to comfort each other, acknowledging how hard the situation is for the both of us, yet we pull through. "Well you're here now." I sigh "You're stopping here for a while I heard, aren't you?"
"Yeah, we're taking a break here until we tour in the East." He says "And I'm glad I'm spending it with you." His eyes admire me as he speaks. I shift my hand a little, making him let go, and I return to his smeared eye makeup.
"So how's life without me at your hip?" He smiles as I exhale and roll my eyes, teasingly. "Better than ever." I say, with a sarcastic tone, making Bill gasp. "School's ok I guess, it's a teensy bit more bearable than last year at least." I take a short pause "...I won a writer's award two weeks ago..." I hold my breath as I wait for the buckets of Bill's compliments and praise to flood the room when he hears of my accomplishment. His eyes shoot open and his neck tilts forward in awe, his lips apart. "Are you kidding? That's amazing y/n! Why didn't you tell me??" He pushes me lightly on the shoulder.
"You expect way too much of me..." I shake my head and smile.
"I knew you would win! I told youuu..." he makes sure to rub the fact that he believed in me in my face before congratulating me "Well done, I'm really proud of you y/n..." He gazes into my eyes and gently places his hand on my knee. I observe his movements and quickly glance away, smiling. "Ok you can shut up now."
"Never. How can I when I'm being taken care of by a future author! Maybe I'll let you write my biography when you're as famous as me ;)" He teases, knowing I don't know how to handle compliments, yet he never fails to praise me anyway, just so I know. "Ok enough! Fine, I'm... proud of myself too I guess!"
"That's the spirit!" he taps my knee lightly, taking his hand away and resting it back onto the arm of his chair. I smile and shake my head, a little flustered from his admiration which, I hate to admit, I secretly love. "So how's tour so far? Are you eating well?" I ask with nurture in my voice as gratitude for his compliments. "Of course I am...you care way too much." He smiles.
"And you're right." I reply, playfully.
"I love that you care so much...even when you pretend you don't." His voice quietens.
"What does that mean?" I scrunch my eyebrows at his words.
"I don't know...you're just so...thoughtful. You always know what to do and say and-"
"Yeah right." I smile, a little overwhelemed by the flood of compliments. "Thanks though, I really do try my best."
"And that's enough for me." He whispers, his cheeks turning a faint pink. "You make me good...or feel like, at my core, I am good. I love it." without teasing or poking fun at him for once, I let him spill his emotions out onto the table where we both can see . I sit and listen, gently wiping his eyes with care. "It's so hard to leave you here, stuck in this village. It's so hard to not hear you laugh and sing and dance beside me... It's so hard not to love you for all thise things" I feel his tender fingertips brushing against my knee as he talks, slowing my pace. Before I can reply, his other hand shifts to my second knee and he holds it delicately. "Bill..." I whisper, with a little confusion but an unexpected sprinkle of excitement rushing through me. he bites his lip, pondering what to say next and trying hard not to stumble over his words. He opens his eyes and gazes directly into my mine, seeing all of me. He takes my hand. I feel butterflies nibbling on the walls of my stomach, their fluttering wings tickling me as they desperately want to flee and touch and love. In the moment, I don't know if it's wrong to feel so much love and desire for him, this ravenous craving that eats me from inside. I can only do what feels right, and so I let the butterflies feed.
He swallows gently "I want to care for you just like you do...I want to..." His hand raises to my face, holding me and caressing my cheek with his thumb in small circles. My hand laches onto his wrist gently, weak to his tender touch. The room falls silent, the only sound in the room coming from the lights above us, buzzing, humming on one note to our intimate moment. "Can I..." His voice fades out slightly and cracks from nervousness. "Can I kiss you?"
His words ring in my head, bouncing off of my ear drums and into my throat, leaving me speechless. I hold him for a while, our hands sharing each other's warmth through touch. I glance down at his lips that are slightly open, breathing in the little air between us; inhaling the glass wall that not moments ago parted us. With desire and lust, my eyes look back into his, and I nod gently. He takes a second to process this, before cupping my face in the palm of his hands and pulling me closer to him, until the wall turns to paper and our lips are inches away from each other. As I close my eyes, I feel his plush lips on mine, sharing our sweet taste. The butterflies in me settle when we collide, and the walls around us feel as though they are caving in, trapping us in each other's arms. As he holds me, I feel cared for. Safe. Warm.
He kisses me delicately and then again with more passion, before pulling away to let me breathe. As he leans back, his mouth curves into a sweet smile, his lips now stained with my light lipstick. I laugh as I notice his red tinted lips, stained with my evidence. I take his hand again, locking my pointer finger with his. "Looks like I'll have to clean you up again..."
"What a shame..." Bill whispers sarcastically, a wide smile pulling apart his rosy cheeks, now matching his lips.
________.✼.________
Tysm for readingg :)) <3 this was so much fun to write
I'm currently working on a 12 part Bill Kaulitz x fem!reader fic on wattpad and I've published the first part!
teethondafloor on wattpad
ZuĆșka
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wolvesroampastelgalaxies · 4 months ago
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Edit: All chapters up on Tumblr & ao3 :p
Okay, so I saaaaid 3 chapters. But like every good ending to a movie franchise, we going halfsies. ;P I will be dead honest, I have only seen the fist episode of FoP: ANW and have no desire to continue, because, as a 24 yo woman I should not feel this distraught about a cartoon. Also, I'm recalling things from the OG series by memory. So if things don't quite line up with canon or lore, just let me have the liberation that comes with fan fiction. Also, I know the show takes place ~20 years ahead, I like to think Timmy kept his fairies till he was 18 and so it has been 12 years since they have last been together.
Second Star To The Right And Straight On Home ⭐ (Part 1)
Timmy had been working on this sales report for the first 3 hours of shift. His hands were cramping as his eyes strained at the screen. Maybe he needed glasses? Definitely needed to start taking magnesium supplements. Was he really getting that old? It wasn’t like he had done much in his life to feel old at 30. That was another thought, he hadn’t done much of anything. He’d been at this job for nearly three years, maybe a handful of failed dates, and spent his free time napping on the couch after eating room temperature pizza. 
  What am I doing?
  Introspection always vined its way like poison ivy through the ridges of his brain when left with his own thoughts.  
  I need fresh air, maybe take a walk, go grab a drink this weekend, anything to break up the monotony.
  Monotony: he never used that word. The world was starting to bleed into the black and white screen he worked with, smearing into something gray. This was torture, working under florescents when there was real sunlight. His cubicle was near the back of the office and closest to the windows. It magnified his gloominess by teasing the bright colors of the outside. He frequently cast glances to see streams of sun peeking through tree leaves. Most times, there was a finch sized bird sitting on the closer branches. Timmy noticed it the first time when, strangely, he was feeling watched. Or maybe he was desperate for attention. 
  Lately, when he’d go to check on the little bird, it was missing, leaving him discontent. It was a strange color, akin to lavender or periwinkle. No amount of Google searches revealed the species. It wasn’t uncommon for Cosmo and Wanda to take animal forms. Green and pink dogs were definitely harder to explain. There were no strange looks when they were pins on his backpack or- 
  Wait. 
  Timmy’s brows furrow and he moves his hands to grip the arms of his chair, sitting up straighter. Though he was looking outside, all focus was on whatever was unfurling in his head. 
  Cosmo and Wanda .... did I ever have dogs? No. Definitely not a green one. I had fish, it's a wonder they stayed alive for so long. 
  Why did he think of those names? Why could he picture personified versions of everyday objects? Always the same color. Green and pink. Pink and green. Because he knew them. He knew they weren't pins on a backpack or an .... umbrella? 
  They were my fish. Right? But they were also people. No, that’s not quite right either. 
  They were his fairies. And he remembers skydiving. He’s never been skydiving. But how does he know the sting of wind on his face?  And why was his parachute talking? Timmy nearly knocks over his chair as he gets to his feet, heart rate increasing like the one and only time he went to the gym. A co-worker catches the sudden movement, sensing a source of panic. 
    “Yo, Turner, you good man?”
  Timmy barely registers the words and makes a noise in the back of his throat as a reply.
    “I’vegottogo.” He tumbles out, snatching his car keys and phone from beneath the desk. 
  He has to find that fishbowl. 
đŸ’«đŸ’«đŸ’«
    The house had been shut up since his parents left on their yearlong Winnebago journey. Outside of Facebook posts and a few messages he rarely spoke to them. They were never really the attentive type. At least not to their son. Timmy has a hard time getting the door open. Images and dialogue clog up his concentration. It’s like their occurring in the moment and yet he’s recalling them from the past at the same time 
  Wishing for Christmas every day? Really immature Timmy.
  ‘We’re two halves of a whole idiot!’
  Wanting to be a girl for the day was a bad idea from the start. What was I thinking? Even if Trixie Tang was hot. Wanda did warn me though.
  'This bike stinks. I need one that’s cool as I am!’ 'This bike is as cool as you are!’
  'Did I really wish to be in the internet? Oh dear God I’m so happy it wasn’t the modern-day web.
  'And here's Wanda with the news: Vicky 's going to kill you when she finds out what you're up to!’
  His head pounds from the jumbled jargon he once knew as it takes meaning again. No wonder he felt so bored with his life now. He had fairies and dumb wishes with dumb, sometimes disastrous outcomes as a kid. Cosmo and Wanda were his fairies! There was a whole world of fairies, anti-fairies, and pixies and magic!  And there was a whole book of rules, all of them he sees himself breaking. As well as being the source of new ones.
  When the keys finally make it into the doorknob and he throws it open, not bothering to retrieve them or close the door. After he had moved out, his parents didn't do anything with his stuff. Just shoved boxes and the miscellaneous in as they needed. Everything was mostly in the same spot. Including the fishbowl.  
  It was right where it should be on his nightstand. Timmy went to reach for it but pulled back, staring intently. Dust had covered the glass surface, and he was afraid that disturbing any of it might cease the onslaught of memories. He wanted these memories, he wanted to know his life hadn’t been useless. That there were people who wanted the best for him and didn’t abandon him when there was a stupid decision to be made. Knowing that two tiny fairies said they cared for him. 
  His heart was pulsing hot bolts of pain at the thought of having lost them in the first place. At wondering why his god-parents left him and where they were now. 
  After a long moment, he tentatively reached out, bringing it closer, letting clips of childhood reflect off the glass. It was barely big enough for one guppy, much less three goldfish. Three. There had been three.   
  There was no cringe or embarrassment attached to this wish. In fact he remembered being the happiest he’d ever been in his life. It has been him and his god-parents for a long time, and he never thought it could get better. It was an overwhelming feeling of love that encompassed past and present. Cosmo and Wanda for once hadn’t warned him of the repercussions, despite them being epoch-making; they all knew it was so worth it. 
  Sadness has such a way of tainting things. It crept unnoticed as another memory took place. It was in this room. He felt a tight squeeze around his arm and saw Cosmo’s face pressed into his shoulder, muffling sobs, his dramatics matching the situation for once. A light kiss pressed itself into his temple as Wanda patted down his hair. Tiny hands pulled at his shirt and tears stained more than his clothes. Then there was nothing. Like it was all a dream that faded with the night and the sun was rising a now dull dawn.
  Timmy rubbed at the dust with his thumb, smearing a tear across it. He remembered the third one. His voice choked on something bitter as he saw through the eyes of his younger self, hugging the baby fairy when it all went away. 
    “Oh Poof, I - I’m so sorry.”
    “Don’t be. And it’s Peri now.”  
          đŸ’« đŸ’« đŸ’«
  Was that really the first thing to say after 12 years? The strain in his own voice prevented what Peri thought might be condescending. Call it intuition or an inference, but he knew Timmy would come back here. After Dev granted his wish, he sat there dumb struck until the kid asked him what happened next. Peri had pictured the reunion with so many different outcomes that, for a moment, he was scared of ‘next.’ Timmy was all the way back in Dimmesdale, across the country, though that was no problem with a little magic. Magic however, could be independent if left without clear boundaries. Peri had no idea how this wish would work out. Would it be instant? Would it come back in pieces? Would it work at all? He was sure he found a loop-hole. He could recall several times his magic went against Da Rules without the intention, and as dangerous as it was, this was his fail safe. 
  This was Peri’s first time shapeshifting into his human form that was not directly from his normal one. His little finch self has flown through the cracked window, its symbolism lost on him.  A human body felt clumsy, but it seemed like the right choice. What if he hadn’t remembered they were fairies yet? Granted, he was still trying to figure out the wings and crown, it was difficult to hide the markers of his true self.
  It would not have mattered if Poof appeared as a fairy or disguised as human, Timmy could see Cosmo and Wanda in him. He had just been a year or two out of his beach-ball stage when Timmy had turned 18, and the then young kid was already resembling his parents. Now, Timmy was struck with the resemblance to his god-parents. His little Poof had Cosmo’s smile and Wanda’s hair, but his eyes were uniquely his own and easily the most identifiable. Timmy had seen those lavender eyes glitter as they first took in the world. He hated anyone or anything that turned those eyes into blank spaces all this time.
  Peri might not have been going by his government name, but he made a noise akin to it when Timmy pounced on him. Petite as he was, something he got from his father (well, before retirement), he felt enveloped by the embrace. Even as a human, Peri was slight and though Timmy was no body-builder, he wasn’t a teenager anymore. The differences didn’t register as he felt the warmth of Timmy’s near crushing hold. His body recalled the last time they were like this, when it was goodbye. As his mind caught up to the haptic memory, the contrast between then and now made him break.
  My brother remembers!
 Relief was meant to be calming, coming out from a storm unharmed, but for them it was a tsunami. For all the bravado and charisma he showcased, over a decade of longing revealed itself. Timmy wasn’t much taller but it was enough so he could hide his face in his brother’s neck, for once not holding back the tears. He felt the human’s cheek press against the side of his head and it was the most contact either had in a time they had stopped counting. Timmy couldn’t believe this, he never wanted to let go, never wanted to forget a single second of this. How could any magic replace this?
  The moment could not bridge the years apart had they stayed this way for twice as long. Timmy had to force himself to push Peri back by his shoulders, one hand staying there and the other pressed against the back of his head to get a better look. If he still had them, he’d wish for the tears to stop so he could see properly.
    “Oh my God. Poof, look at you! You grew up! How-how could I have missed this?” He hiccuped.
   Peri didn’t bother to correct him, the name was childish but they had both been children when Timmy named him and if anyone had a pass to say it, it was his big brother.  The fairy took a shaky breath, attempting to blink away the kaleidoscopic effect of tears. 
    “Like -,” he has to step back, letting both of Timmy’s hands rest on his shoulders, or he might never stop crying, “Like I said, don’t be sorry.” He smiled pitifully. They could fix it now
    “We used to watch - oh what was that show? Sleazy and Cheezy! And you about got me killed!” He laughed, wanting to recall as much as possible
    “And - and remember the time mom was so mad because you were teaching me to shape shift!”
    “Tree and bee do sound the same!”
    “Okay but, you definitely stretched it with the bird and rocket mix up!”
    “Hey, I wasn’t gonna let you take the fall. You were already falling in on our roof.” 
  Reluctantly, Timmy let go of Peri’s narrow shoulders, the euphoria bottoming out. Peri saw the dimming of blue eyes, and an intense anxiety struck him. This time he was the one reaching out.
    “What’s wrong? 
  Timmy pulls away and moved to sit on the edge of his bed. A musty smell arose as the sheets crinkled under the weight. Peri watched as a perturbed look took form.
    “Why?” He finally says.
    “What do you mean ‘why’?”
    “I grew up, they wiped my brain. You could have lived eternity and forgotten about me.”
     Peri had a lightning-like shot of anger, “I could never forget about you. None of us could.”
     Timmy scoffed, “You’re telling me that immortal fairies, who have had countless god-kids throughout the centuries, would find me so important?”
     The fairy clenches his fist, stomping over to force the human to look at him. "You have no idea how hard they fought for you. Or how much of a hole you left for us. They haven't had a god-kid since you.” 
    “Really?” He concedes. It dissipates into something bitter and selfish when he sees Peri’s resolve falter.
    “Well -
    “I figured as much.”
    “No, you don’t understand.” He says the harshness leaving, replaced with empathy. He sits down next to Timmy. “It was very recent. And I was mad and couldn’t understand either, after all we went through.”
   “Thanks.” He says flatley. 
   “Will you just listen to me? When they met Hazel, they said it felt different from their time with you. Because they realized you meant more than being their god-kid. That it was the same feeling they have with me.”  
 They think of me like their son? 
  Timmy wills himself not to let go of another tear, but it has been an emotional day and having half your life re-written can be a little overwhelming.
    “Do they know, that, well, that I know ? ”
    Peri grins, a bit of debonair sneaking in, “Would you like to tell them?”
  He thinks of the first time he met his god-parents, at 10 it never crossed his mind to be skeptical because, hey, unlimited wishes. Now that he’s older, he realizes all the lessons he learned from them. And how he could get away with so much more with Cosmo and how Wanda would nag him like a mother. They were more his parents than his biological ones. 
    Timmy bumps his shoulder with Peri’s, “You realize we probably are going to be crying again?”
    “No doubt. Family reunions can be emotional.” He says with a curt nod, now wearing a full smile. 
  Family. His family. 
    “I gatta ask though, did you say your name was Peri?”   
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srgntjamesbuckybarnes · 1 year ago
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The List (3)
Summary: When a hit list spreads around New York, Bucky’s ex-wife is the only one with any information.
Rating: Mature
Pairing: Mafia Bucky Barnes x Ex-Wife Reader
Warnings: None
Word Count: 2.9k
A/N: Not Beta’d. Thank you for all the continuous interest expressed in this mini-series. Your comments influence my writing so I’m just as excited as all of you to see how this series ends. Tumblr only lets me tag 50 accounts at a time. If you are not listed blow, you will be tagged in the comments. If you would like to join the taglist for this series or would like to be removed let me know!
Series Masterlist
Previous Chapter
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Chapter 3
Tony had been right; every news station had been reporting on the gala for weeks. When they weren’t discussing the night of the gala, they opted to report on Bucky. With her eyes and ears glued to the television and her phone, the days blurred together for Y/N. There was no word from Bucky. She was sure he would use his first call to contact her, but he didn’t. The only update she received was from the reporters who didn’t know Bucky the way she did. They didn’t know the way he would stare at her or bush his thumb over her lips before planting a gentle kiss on her lips. They didn’t know about the sweet nothings he would whisper in her ear as he held her at night. They didn’t know he protected Steve years before Steve worked for him or that Bucky took in Peter to give him a community after the death of his guardian, Aunt May. Instead, the media painted him as a monster, choosing to focus on his involvement with the mob. Loki, however, was never mentioned. He was quick to cover his tracks like a snake shedding its skin.
The number of people sent to assassinate Y/N and Bucky at the gala told her everything she needed to know. Her ex-fiancĂ© knew that she knew it was him. With Bucky’s fate all over the news and Y/N not being one of the bodies recovered at the gala, Loki knew they were still alive. He called her several times over the past three weeks, but she never answered. He wasn’t the one that was supposed to call her. It was supposed to be Bucky. It was always supposed to be Bucky.
Twisting in the bedsheets Y/N ran her hand along the space beside her. The smooth silk that was usually welcomed felt wrong beneath her hand. She longed to reach out and touch Bucky like she had many times before. The soft glow of the tv cast the bedroom in a blue hue. The last time she felt this grief-stricken was when she had been going through her divorce from Bucky. Once again, the man was alive but just out of reach, this time, psychically. Yet, she was sprawled out on his bed like a widow refusing to leave her husband’s grave. He was alive but gone again and she was mourning. The only shade of blue she wanted was Bucky’s eyes staring back at her.
A muffled voice echoed down the hall. Most of Bucky’s men had frequented his house lately. Steve had moved everyone in during Bucky’s absence. Y/N didn’t know how Bucky would feel about that. He had always been a private person, but Steve had assured Y/N that it is what Bucky would do. After all, Bucky had told Y/N to find Steve. He was his right-hand man and Bucky had entrusted Steve to take care of business while he was in prison. That included taking care of Y/N and the rest of Bucky’s men all awaiting their names to become active on the hit list. The voice grew louder, and Y/N knew it was Steve. He was the only one who lingered by Bucky’s bedroom.
“Not good. She breaks down every time he calls.”
Was he talking about her? Y/N pushed herself up, wrapping the sheet around her nude chest. She could hear the dismissal of Steve’s end of the conversation loud and clear followed by a knock. Tightening her grip on the sheet, Y/N forced her focus onto the muted television, pretending to be reading the captions as if she hadn’t been eavesdropping.
“Come in,” she called out, her voice hoarse.
Steve trudged into the room, just as exhausted as he had every other day, he checked in on her. It was a stark contrast to the way Bucky always checked in on her. Bucky was resilient, never letting his work consume him wholly. Steve on the other hand, always gave everything he did 110%. Taking over Bucky’s position was no exception.
“You shouldn’t be watching all of this stuff,” Steve grunted, snatching up the remote and changing the channel.
Y/N didn’t have the energy to fight him. She was desperate for information on Bucky. She had shot him the last time she saw him, and all the news cared about was that a mob leader was captured at the site of the crime. Steve tossed the remote on the bed beside Y/N. She stared up at him, his eyes the wrong shade of blue.
“Steve, was that Bucky on the phone?” Y/N questioned; her voice laced with misery. Steve remained expressionless, not giving her any hints as to who was on the other end of the phone. She didn’t blame him for not saying anything. It was part of his job to keep information confidential. If someone told Steve a secret, he would guard it with his life. She just hoped he would keep her in the loop since she was a part of whatever this was now. Y/N’s lip trembled the longer Steve remained silent.
“Has Loki called again?” Steve crossed his arms.
He had been asking her about Loki every day since the gala. At first, she wanted to help so she cooperated, answering his questions but then they became repetitive. He was trying to give her something to do to feel useful. Steve didn’t need information from her. It was a distraction from one man in her life with another. She was spiraling like the loose thread of a sweater; with each question, she unraveled until she was bare.
No longer willing to entertain Steve’s questions, Y/N dropped her shoulders letting just how exhausted she truly was show. “Why hasn’t he called me?”
Steve ran a hand through his darkening hair. His once golden locks had begun to brown at the roots. With his busy schedule, he didn’t have time to shave his beard or cut his lengthening hair. It reminded her of when she first met Bucky. His dark hair was long, and his beard was slightly overgrown. Over time, he cut his hair for a cleaner, more respected look. He no longer needed his intimidating appearance to get ahead, his name alone was enough to scare his enemies. Y/N supposed it was Loki’s long hair and charming personality that had won her over. He reminded her of Bucky when they had first met. It was her longing to reconnect with Bucky that drove her into Loki’s arms. It also was the reason both of their names were on a hit list, and Bucky was sitting in a prison cell.
“Come on, get dressed.” Steve turned his back walking toward the door.
“Where are we going?” Y/N clutched the sheet tighter, scrambling after him.
The corner of his lips lifted in a half smile. “A little birdy told me you could use some practice.”
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“You brought me to a warehouse?” Y/N frowned. She squinted, a hand coming up to shield her eyes from the sun. The swish of cars zipping across the bridge above them pierced her ears. The livelihood above a strikingly different atmosphere beneath the bridge. The water sloshed against the pebbles, seeping into her shoes. Her face twisted into a grimace as water expelled from her socks with each step.
Steve chuckled, untangling a heavy metal chain from the door handles. The chain landed in the pebbles with a heavy thud. “After you,” Steve held the door open ushering her inside.
Her eyes scrunched up as Steve flipped a switch, the light blinding her momentarily. She could feel a slight breeze as Steve moved around her, the door slamming shut behind her seconds later.
“And that, right there is exactly why we’re here.”
Y/N frowned, peeling her eyes open. The blonde’s back was turned to her as he fumbled with something on the table in front of him. Peeking around his shoulder a series of firearms were laid across the table.
“What?”
Steve sighed, turning his whole body to face her. His large cold left hand seized her right. His right shoved a gun into her hand before clasping her left over the gun as well. Y/N stood stock-still, dumbfounded by the gun in her hand. The last time she held a gun she killed a man. She also shot Bucky. “I-I don’t-”
Steve silenced her as his long legs carried him to the other side of the room to set up a paper shooting target. Clipping the paper along a wire Steve began, “You closed your eyes the last time you pulled the trigger.”
Y/N paled at the memory. She didn’t want to shoot anybody; she didn’t even want the gun in the first place.
Steve stalked up to her with a pair of earmuffs in hand. “That is why we’re here.” He slapped the earmuffs over her head, his hands securing them over her ears. He then repeated the process himself.
A million questions scrambled around Y/N’s brain but the only one she was able to voice was, “How?” Steve said nothing, just nudging her into position across from the target. Remembering the earmuffs, Y/N repeated her question louder this time.
Steve bit the inside of his cheek, his eyes cast downward. “Bucky.”
Y/N’s eyes widened, flinging her hands in the air in disbelief. “You talked to him?!”
Steve ducked, his hands covering his head. A growl escaped him as he stood up, “Watch where you’re pointing that thing.”
Y/N waved the bulletless gun in his face, “It’s empty.”
He knew that. He had been the one to hand her the gun. He unloaded it. A frown crossed Steve’s face, “Rule number one, always treat a gun as if it’s loaded. Your negligence is the reason we’re here. You could’ve killed Bucky when you pulled that trigger.”
“But I didn’t,” Y/N pressed. “He wanted me to shoot him.”
Steve ignored the edge in her voice, picking up a loaded gun he fired three rounds in the exact spot Y/N had shot Bucky. His accuracy was so precise there was only one hole in the paper; the other two bullets followed the first one. Heaving Steve glared down at Y/N, “Bucky told me to take you here. When you can fire that gun without closing your eyes, I’ll take you to see him. Until then, you better start taking this seriously. Keeping your eyes open could mean the difference between life and death next time. You got lucky last time but I can assure you, luck runs out eventually. It always does.”
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As promised, Steve had dropped her off to visit Bucky after a thorough explanation of what would happen. She had been searched leaving her feeling violated but that was the least of her worries when Bucky rounded the corner donned in an orange jumpsuit. Even in a prison jumpsuit, he managed to remain attractive. The orange flattered his chocolate locks that appeared to have been buzzed on the sides, his beard fuller. If it wasn’t for his bent left arm preventing the handcuffs from pulling his right arm out of the sling, she would have thought he was thriving in prison.
As Bucky approached Y/N abruptly stood to greet him. Silence permitted the space, separated by a piece of plexiglass as a guard removed his handcuffs. Tears pricked her eyes at the sight. She murdered a man. She should be behind bars with him.
Bucky’s steel blue eyes held Y/N’s gaze. It was intense. For weeks Y/N had only met with the man in her dreams. Which wasn’t many. Sleepless nights swallowed up any time she would have had with Bucky. Now that she was standing a foot away from him, unable to touch him she didn’t know what was worse.
The guard stepped away, his lingering hand shoving Bucky into the chair. Bucky hissed at the contact but other than that, he didn’t react. His focus remained solely on Y/N standing before him. They only had an hour and he intended to use every second of it.
Y/N’s eyes were wild. She wanted nothing more than to yell at the guard’s rough handling, but Bucky wasn’t causing a scene, so she bit her tongue. She wouldn’t make this any worse for him. Her eyes snapped back to Bucky as she finally sat across from him. Her eyes raked his body for any other injuries, but his jumpsuit made it impossible.
After her third scan, she caught Bucky’s lips moving. The silver cord already stretched across his chest; the phone rested in his left hand. “Pick up the phone, princess,” he mouthed, causing her cheeks to puff as she smiled. Bucky’s eyes crinkled in delight at the sight of her red-manicured nails wrapped around the glossy black phone.
After weeks of being in the dark, Y/N couldn’t help but ask Bucky the questions Steve refused to answer, “Are you okay? Did you tell them-”
“Y/N,” Bucky’s gruff voice interrupted. “Anything you say here can be recorded and used in court.” It was his polite way of telling her to shut up. It wasn’t her fault; he had kept this part of his business away from her. It was all new to her and the court would use it against him. They would use her against him. Noticing the dejected look on her face, Bucky's face softened. “Look, all I can tell you is that a lawyer who represents some big names has kindly taken my case. Don’t worry about me baby, he’s one of the best.”
Reading between the lines, Y/N had gathered that Stark had offered his lawyer. Tony usually got his way, and he didn’t settle for less, so a sense of relief flooded Y/N. Bucky leaned forward, his left elbow on the table.
“Good. I um- I brought you a suit for the trail. The guards took it. Said they would have it sent to you on the day of the trial.”
Bucky hummed, “What color is it?” He didn’t really care about the color of the suit. He would have worn anything she brought. It was the simplicity in their conversation he craved. A moment where he wasn’t giving orders or looking over his shoulder.
A dreamy look crossed her face, “Blue to bring out your eyes.” That and Steve had said blue was associated with innocence and honesty in the courtroom.
With a dramatic eye roll, Bucky joked, “It’s not a fashion show, Y/N, but tell me," he cleared his throat. “How was training with Steve today? Is he taking care of you?”
A storm cloud hovered above Y/N as she suddenly remembered their betrayal. “He was mean. You called Steve instead of me?”
“I had some affairs to get in order. I'm responsible for you. Steve kept me updated. I knew you were safe. If I would have called you, you would have distracted me.”
“Distracted you?” Y/N asked in disbelief.
Bucky shrugged his good shoulder, “It’s kind of lonely in here. I would’ve used all my time thinking with my other head.”
A fire raged behind Y/N’s eyes, her knuckles turning white against the phone. Is that all I am to you, Buck? A distraction? So, what if you knew that I was safe. What about me?! All of my information about you came from the news which is hardly fact.”
The brunette’s jaw clenched, “Of course not, Y/N.” Resting the phone on his shoulder, he ran his good hand down his face. “I talk business with Steve. You get the rest of me. Besides, you were the one who asked me to protect you, not the other way around.”
Y/N scoffed leaning back in her chair, legs crossed. “Yeah, and if I remember correctly, I saved you. I don’t want fragments of you Bucky and I don’t won’t be kept in the dark.”
Bucky ran his tongue along the front of his teeth staring her down. They had been caught in a haze the past few weeks. Their latest interaction left a bitter taste in his mouth, a reminder of their fights leading up to their divorce. If he was stupid, he’d make the same mistake twice, but Bucky was a predator, a hunter. He knew it was time to change tactics and give in.
Mirroring Y/N, Bucky settled back in his chair. “Okay, princess. You want in on all of the secrets, you want to meet the dark side of me, I’ll let you meet ‘em.”
Y/N blinked back in surprise. He was giving in. So easily? “What’s the catch?”
Bucky grinned like the devil. Y/N once again found herself ready to make a deal with the devil, a habit she had yet to break. “No catch, baby doll. You want me and my lifestyle, you want to be treated like a big girl, the whole nine, you'll get it. No more playing house. If you wanna be a big girl, then you have to make big girl sacrifices. You want to be a queen, then you gotta marry a king. Just remember, you asked for this.”
The color drained from Y/N’s face. “Bucky, you can’t be serious.”
“I am dead serious princess.” Bucky pressed his left hand against the plexiglass staring her down from beneath his eyebrows. “Marry me.”
Next Chapter
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leonrot · 1 year ago
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— Accidental Intruder
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Summary: With Leon away for work the storm outside bothers you more than it usually would. The sounds you hear downstairs however scare you more than the storm ever could.
Word Count: 1.5k
Pairing: Leon Kennedy x GN!Reader
Tags: thoughts/assumptions of a break in, reckless handling of a knife, hurt/comfort, pet names (sweetheart, baby), established relationship
A/N: ok so,,, this man has been plaguing my life for weeks now, then this idea popped into my head, now here we are. this is my first time using tumblr in years so please bare with me as i figure this shit out lmfao. i kinda sorta proofread this so if you find anything i missed or tags need to be added lemme know! also i wrote this at 3 am so if stuff doesn't make sense... my bad LOL
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When you and Leon had first started dating he had warned you that his job would keep him away more frequently than what’s considered normal for a romantic relationship.
“As long as you come back to me in one piece, I don’t mind.” You had told him. You had meant what you said, at least
 mostly meant it.
It was times like this that maybe you had been lying just a tiny bit.
It was storming outside, waves of rain pelting the walls of the house you share with Leon. The power had gone out a few hours ago, the rage of the storm knocking it out only a few minutes after the rain had started. The lightning was bright as it ignited your room in a faint blue hue in random intervals, the following thunder roaring so loud it’s been shaking the entire house.
Usually you find comfort in storms like this, but with the power out and the knowledge that you’re home alone so late at night you can’t help the fear that surges through your body with every crack of thunder and every new wave of pounding rain.
You’re curled up in bed, wrapped up in the dark blue comforter that adorns the bed. A resounding clap of thunder has your eyes squeezing shut, a tremor working its way through your body. You wished Leon was here with you, murmuring his reassuring words in your ear, holding you tight against his chest. He’s told you thousands of times throughout your relationship that he would always keep you safe and in this moment all you want is him to do just that, keep you safe against this storm that sounds like it’s trying to shred its way into your house and whisk you away in a drowning and overbearing wave.
He’s away for work and the message you had woken up to early this morning had told you he wouldn’t be home until tomorrow, maybe the day after.
“Get a grip..” You mutter to yourself, clenching and unclenching your fists that are wrapped up tightly in the blanket. The sound of rain fills the room like staticky, white noise and you huff, annoyed at how fearful you are of something that’s never bothered you until now. Throwing the blankets off your body you slide out of bed, tensing at the low rumble of thunder.
“Stop being a baby.” You chide yourself. “You’ve never been afraid of storms, don’t start being afraid of them now. It’s just some rain.”
You shuffle into the bathroom, the old gray hoodie of Leon’s you’re wearing keeping you warm against the chill of the house. Turning the faucet to cold you run your hands under the water, letting the water drench your hands. Running your now wet hands over your face you use the cold water to help calm your nerves. It starts to work, until the floorboards downstairs creak. The fear you were trying to ease rears its head, stronger than it previously was.
The sound of heavy footsteps traipsing across the floor of the living room has your heartbeat picking up speed, the rhythmic thump thump thump echoing in your ears.
Someone's in the house.
Fear thrums violently throughout your body, bottom lip quivering as you suck in a quiet breath. You're unmoving, terror rendering you frozen where you stand. The house falls silent for a moment—save for the sound of the rain—before the footsteps pick up again, louder this time. Whoever is in your house is heading for the stairs.
You feel tears start to pool in your eyes as all the worst possible scenarios invade your thoughts. Forcing yourself to move you dart back into the bedroom. You race towards Leon’s side of the bed, dropping into a squat as you fumble with the bottom of the mattress, grabbing the knife you know he keeps stashed there. Gripping the handle tightly you move towards the bedroom closet, slipping quietly behind the door, holding the combat knife closely to your chest.
The intruder makes their way up the stairs, footfalls echoing through the hallway. You suck in a quiet, sharp breath as the door to the bedroom opens. The tears you're trying so hard to keep quiet are trickling down your cheeks, your bottom lip held tightly between your teeth in an attempt to stay silent and undetected. Knowledge that your phone is on the bed somewhere in the mess of blankets, the only thing you could possibly reach help on, leaves you shaking even harder.
The person trudges around the bedroom, boots scuffling against the hardwood floor. Stuff sounds like it’s being moved around, something being dropped on the floor as well as the sound of something dropping onto one of the bedside tables in the room. The intruder stops walking, the sound of their steps leading you to believe they're at least by the bathroom.
Just when you think the intruder is going to leave after finding no one in the house, the sound of footsteps are heading your way. The closet door swings open and then you're screaming, bringing the knife you have held close to your body towards the person in front of you, eyes shut tightly in fear. A hand wraps around your wrist, overpowering your strength. 
“Sweetheart!” A familiar voice yells, startling you so bad you let go of the knife, not even registering the sound of it clashing to the floor. Eye’s flying open, you look up, meeting Leon’s gaze.
“What the hell are you doing?” Leon questions, his voice a melting pot of confusion, anger at having a knife swung his way, and immense worry for his terrified lover.
“I-I thought someone broke—,” You heave, sobbing at this point, “broke into the house!”
Leon quickly bends down and grabs at the knife, sliding it across the floor away from the two of you so there’s no danger of stepping on it. Attention back on you he reaches out and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into his t-shirt clad chest. His lean arms are tight around your body, encompassing you in the feeling of safety you always miss when Leon’s away.
“The storm was fr-freaking me out,” You suck in a hiccuping breath, trying desperately to calm down. Your face is hidden in the curve of his neck, your words almost inaudible. “Thought wiping m-my face with cold water would ca-calm me down..”
Leon runs his hands up and down your sides, face pressed into the soft locks on top of your head. “Breathe, baby. Follow my breathing.” He makes a point of taking noticeable breaths.
Little by little your sobbing dwindles until stray tears are dripping off your chin and you're able to breathe normally with only a few hiccups lingering.
“I could hear you downstairs, but I didn't know it was you. I grabbed your knife from under the mattress and hid in the closet, I didn't know what else to do.”
“Oh sweetheart
” Leon presses a kiss into your hair, hands still trailing up and down your sides. “C’mon, let's go to bed.”
He leads you to the bed, stopping at the edge of it to undress down to his briefs as you climb into the bed. Leon slips under the covers after you, arms snaking around your waist to pull you into his embrace. The warmth of his bare chest helps ease your frayed nerves as you rest your cheek against his shoulder, side pressed flush against him. The arm not wedged between the two of you slides over his stomach, seeking to be even closer to him than you already are.
The storm that was scaring you earlier was helping in calming you down now that you have Leon here, the thunder not as scary as Leon’s strong heartbeat fills your ears.
“I’m sorry for scaring you. I saw the blankets all bunched up on the bed and figured you were burrowed beneath them, I didn’t even think to check to see if I was right. I just assumed you were asleep.” He murmurs, the kiss he presses to your temple an extension of his apology.
“You didn’t scare me on purpose..” Your words come out mumbled as the adrenaline in your system starts to ease, leaving you feeling tired.
“Doesn’t matter, I still scared you.”
You yawn, burying your head further into his shoulder. If it’s uncomfortable for him he doesn’t say so and even if he did, you probably wouldn’t move. He’s far too comfortable and you’ve missed him so much that he’s going to have to deal with you seeking closeness now that he’s back.
“Go to sleep, sweetheart. I’ll keep you safe.”
Leaning up you press a kiss to his jaw before you settle back down, eyes fluttering shut. “Don’t forget to pick up your knife in the morning.”
His low, baritone laugh rumbles in his chest, drawing a small smile to your lips. You barely hear Leon’s words as you succumb to the warmth of him seeping into your skin and the sleep overtaking your body.
“I won’t.”
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