#its literally 2am i apologize

[saturfied]

this is irrelevant, probably, but

DAMON

backwards is literally

NOMAD

[just-some-guy-joust]

me knowing full damn well madohomu probs got snipped because for some reason people get so needlessly violent I am so fuckin sorry I regret originally submitting either-

You don't have to regret submitting them! They are incredibly doomed by the narrative. If I knew anything about madoka magica I probably would have submitted them too

You can't ever know what other people are going to do. The best you can do is whatever you think is best with the information you have. You submitted characters that had a pretty damn good chance of winning a themed tournament. I took them out to minimize the amount of drama present in a re-do. We both did what we thought would make things fun and we were both correct! The initial reactions to the madohomu matchup were incredibly funny

But, like I said, we can't predict what other people will do. You shouldn't regret submitting them, I don't regret leaving them out. They can continue to be doomed in our hearts and the competition will continue to be silly and lighthearted. And that's the best we can do -R

[cloverpurr]

i love playing wcue and seeing people who have never read a warrior cats book in their lives say stuff "hey no fighting (as in, in character fighting), this is a kids game" or "the clan rps are so boring and i hate them. lets do a magic school or zodiac rp instead!!!!!!"

i know the game has died out and actual wc fans dont play it anymore but god its so funny but so infuriating at the same time to see stuff like this like . i dont agree with the argument of "oh they just think its a normal cat rp game!!!" bc like. the zodiac roleplays, the magic school, the royalty rp, all of those have ppl who basically just act like . people. the pl in the royalty rp are liek "grabs broom and sweeps", magic school rpers are like "grabs pencil and writes" and even jus other non clan cat rps are like "wipes eyes with hands, gets dressed, gets out of bed, etc etc" like dude. this is warrior cats roleplay. there are plenty of other roleplay games on roblox to play (COUGH COUGH ROYALE HIGH IS RIGHT FUCKING THERE COUGH COUGH) but yet. here we are.

[puppywilliams]

could you write about streamer abby 🥺

streamer abby

a/n: i literally love this au so much. i kept thinking about this req so i wrote this quickly even though its 2am °՞(ᗒᗣᗕ)՞° sorry if its lazy or it has typos!! lmk if u want more of streamer abby because id rlly love to expand on this au! im so tired so thank you for reading <3

warnings: Could be taken suggestively, size difference.

you have a simple life now that you’re in your early twenties, which is way earlier than you thought you would, but when your wife is loaded from twitch money whos to complain? abby takes care of you, you take care of abby.

she buys you pretty clothes and dainty jewelry. loving to see you spin around for her in a new outfit she had picked out and paid for herself. eyeing you up, asking herself how she got this lucky. if you needed something it was taken care of, if you wanted something, it was yours. sometimes she would buy you gifts just because she wants to treat her gorgeous wife. setting a gift bag down on the table and watching your eyes light up with curiosity.

when abby gets recognized it public it normally doesn’t bother you, it happens so much you expect it at this point, but that doesn’t mean you don’t watch where someones hand is placed, or how comfortable they immediately get with Your wife. putting you in a sour mood for the rest of the outing. abby watches you sulk the whole way home knowing you’ll get over it.

you often bring her dinner while shes streaming, knocking on her office door waiting until she lifts up one side of her headset and calls out “come in!” you walk in and set her plate on down carefully on her desk

“thank you, baby” she says softly and kisses you on the cheek. her chat floods as normal, not-so-painfully forcing you to sit in abby’s lap looking pretty and talking to her rambling chat while she queues up for her next quick play on overwatch. answering questions, saying hi to people you recognize from other occasions, thanking donators, all while abby mindlessly stares off onto the screen resting her head on your shoulder and wrapping her arms around you. her chats probably more obsessed with you than they are abby, but definitely not more than abby’s obsessed with you.

on some nights its late, and you’re watching a show in your shared bedroom. abby’s “working late” which is essentially her just screaming at the top of her lungs as she streams a horror game for the 5th night in a row. it echos the walls from behind you. it does bother you sometimes when you’re trying to sleep and she wont shut the hell up. but its worth it when she crawls into bed nearly 30 minutes later smothering you in kisses and apologizing for keeping you up. you love it, you’re addicted to it even. you’d let her scream every night until the sunrises for her to talk to you in that sweet raspy voice of hers you keep telling her shes gonna lose if she keeps it up.

she wraps her strong arms around your frame, molding you like putty. lazily kissing your neck. “i know its late…i’m sorry..” she mumbles into your skin so delicately. abby was always so Gentle with you, for a woman who could bench press you, she sure did treat you like you were made glass, like if she hurt you, she Herself would bleed. “‘s kay..” you mumble back to her. she kisses your forehead one last time before closing her eyes. fingers running through your hair as you both fall asleep. it was a routine, a beautiful one you loved. you’d do it all again tomorrow, and thank a higher power that it was possible.

[duhnova]

a challenge - choi seungcheol & jeon wonwoo

word count: ~1.5k

synopsis: a punishment thats not really a punishment

warning(s): smut under the cut (mdni!!!), dubcon?, spanking, multiple orgasms, squirting, fingering, masturbation, cum on body, reader is called a good girl & baby & princess, let me know if i forgot anything! - don't mind grammatical errors/typos (i tried and its 2am). this is literally just mindless, and its been sitting in my drive FOREVER… anyways i finally did something with it because of @multi-kpop-fanfics

it was safe to say that you should never challenge your best friends on who can fuck you better - especially when one of them has been your friends with benefits for months now. wonwoo wasn’t a possessive person, and he’d be damned if seungcheol could think he could fuck you better than him. which is where you found yourself right now, several rounds later, neither one of them wanting to back down but physically they needed to take a break and after you had orgasmed before either one of them gave you permission too it was only fair that you were punished. 

seungcheol grabbed your hips to drag you to the edge of the bed where your legs hang off. he has a smirk on his face as his fingers dig into your hips a little while he makes eye contact with wonwoo who nods his head a little, telling him to go for it. he moves one of his hands to rest on your lower back to keep you in place and he uses his other hand to rub soothingly at your ass cheeks. 

“i want you to start counting for me princess.” and with that his heavy hand made contact with your left ass cheek, the same one wonwoo had smacked not even a minute ago. whining quietly, your feet come up to try and cover your ass.

“no.” seungcheol pushes your legs back down. “every time you do that i’ll start over. understood?” when you nod he's quick to land another blow to the same one.

“two..” you let out a shaky breath only for seungcheol to scoff. “no?” you whine before he lands another smack to your ass causing you to squeak.

“that’s two.” 

“but-“ he smacked your ass again, cutting your sentence off.

“we started over because you moved your legs, remember?” you nod your head quickly, your fingers digging into the sheet below you. he takes a second to rub your ass cheek, allowing the soft side to come out for just a second before he smacks it. 

“four!” you yelp, your legs kicking up a little from the shock of it. you’re quick to put them back down as you stutter out apology after apology. “please don’t start over im sorry! i’ll be good i promise!”

“i don’t know sweetheart.. that’s the second time now,” he looks up at wonwoo who was sitting in his gaming chair, his boxers back on but his cock still painfully hard underneath. “wonwoo?” 

“smack her ass till she’s cumming and crying.” any nice bone in his body was gone as his jaw set while he watched the older male do just as he said. 

you yelped and whined as seungcheol’s heavy hand came down on both of your ass cheeks, alternating every couple smacks to give the other a break. the pain began to mix with pleasure at some point, there was no real friction offered other then the little jolts your body did as you rocked against the bed with every blow. 

around the thirtieth smack your counting didn’t even matter anymore as you dig your nails into the sheets, your babbling getting louder as some twisted part of your body decided you were going to cum when he delivered a particularly hard smack. tears stream down your face as you sob, your legs coming up to cover your ass, seungcheol letting them as you process the fact that you just orgasmed from him spanking you. 

“good girl.” seungcheol coos as he lets his hand wander down so his fingers can feel the juices that begin to seep out of you. “can you give us another one?”

“i think she can.” wonwoo groans quietly from his seat as he finally allows his hands to offer himself some relief. you whine loudly when his fingers ghost over your entrance before you’re wiggling your hips. 

“‘m a good girl.” is all you mumble before your legs scoot open enough so seungcheol’s hand can fit between them. 

“you are,” wonwoo hums as he rubs his hard cock through his boxers. “my good girl.”

“our good girl.” seungcheol mumbles before dipping his fingers into your sopping pussy. your slick made it easy or his middle and ring finger to set a fast pace. 

you gasp at the pace, your body still sensitive from all the orgasms you had experienced before your “punishment” that wasn’t so much of a punishment after you were allowed to cum followed by seungcheol stuffing you with his thick fingers.

“cheollie~” you mewl when his fingers curl to hit the bundle of nerves that has your legs closing and locking around his arm as he continues to draw wet squelching from your pussy. 

“open those pretty legs baby.” wonwoo groans quietly. seungcheol manages to unwrap your legs from his arm before forcing them open so wonwoo can watch his fingers disappear in your wet heat. 

“thats it baby.. take it all.” seungcheol groans at the feeling of your pussy clenching around his fingers as he speeds up the pace, his arm muscles flexing as he focuses on your pleasure more then the cramp he knows he’s going to get later. 

“cum.. cum!” you babble as you try to find something on the bed to clutch. the rubber band in your stomach was pulled tight, tighter than it ever has been pulled. 

“wanna cum already?” seungcheol smirks almost triumphantly, he’s managed to rip two orgasms out of you in such a quick and short period of time. 

“please.. please! please!” you beg pathetically, before either of them could give you an answer the orgasm washes over your body like a tsunami. it was like a dam broke as you squirt all over cheols fingers and arms - he tries to help you rid it out but your pussy forces his fingers out as he rubs hard at your clit to milk you for everything you have. 

“shiiiiit.” you sob as your body goes limp, your face buried in the crook of your elbow. wonwoo groans loudly as he stands up to shoo seungcheol away, his cock in his hand again. 

“you did so good baby.” he moans lowly, his glasses sliding down his nose as he looks down at your spent body, your ass red - a little bit of purpleing could be seen as the bruises begin to form. “fuck.” he whines quietly as he jerks his cock faster before cumming all over your ass and back, painting you white. 

“so, who fucked you better princess?” seungcheol mumbled as he sat on the bd next to you to push the hair out of your eyes while you panted quietly, still trying to come down. 

“i..” you huff before rolling over onto your back, not caring about the cum thats all over it as you stare at wonwoo whos standing above you before looking at seungcheol whos to your right. “i think its a tie..” you laugh quietly while they both look at each other with raised eyebrows. 

“a tie?” wonwoo grumbles. 

“that can’t do princess, one of us had to fuck you a little better than the other.” seungcheol continues to pet your hair gently. 

“well,” you offer them a tired grin. “maybe round two can help me decide.”

“right now?” wonwoo’s eyes are a little wide, collectively the three of you have orgasmed at least twelve times. 

“not tonight, you two might actually fuck me dumb.”

“and our dicks could fall off.” wonwoo jokes as he shuffles around the room to find your water bottle, aftercare with him included him feeding and hydrating you until you could get up on your own to get cleaned up. once you quenched your thirst, seungcheol hoisted you up in his arms so he could take you to the bathroom. 

“i assure you if we go one last round in the shower my dick won’t fall off.”  he jokes as he sets you down on a towel on the sink. 

“hey! you’re not about to fuck her in my shower without me.” wonwoo tries to follow but seungcheol moves quicker then that to lock him out. 

“snooze you lose! besides we wouldn’t want your precious dick to fall off.” he laughs quietly before going to start the shower for you, letting it warm up.

“are we really gonna fuck while he stands out there and pouts?” you giggle as he helps you stand, walking you slowly into the shower so he can help your clean up. 

“no, i just wanted some alone time with you that's all.” he hums quietly as hes gentle about rubbing soap on your body. you learn very quickly that seungcheol’s aftercare is very much physical as he helps you clean up, dry off and get dressed before he takes you back to wonwoos bed to cuddle in the fresh blankets while said male goes back to gaming after freshening up himself. 

feedback + reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[autisticclownfromhell]

its 2am and Xiao is taking over my mind

istg Xiao has some ungodly pain tolerance, and we all know it

but its not even a tolerance at this point, its an immunity or something

like you could kick this man with all your might, with stilettos on, square in the stomach, and he would give less than a small grunt and then just say "..What was that for?" with a perfectly normal tone

so like.... i bet.. hedoesn'treallymindifhishairgetspulled...

ok yeah im right.

The only way you could ever possibly injure this guy is verbally. Just make some really mean and backhanded comment and watch as he questions his existence. But you could literally only do that if you were this guy's EVERYTHING. Just know that he would hang on to every word you say! So next time you make a remark about him big or small remember that he's gonna think about that... for a whileeeeee. Don't say anything stupid.

Especially with sagau cult au where they think reader is some creator!!!

I mean, he'd see you as his everything. Literally. Say one wrong thing about him in sagau and boom his world has shattered :(( he spirals into a "omg whats wrong with me that the creator doesnt like??!!?" mindset if that makes any sense. Also he'd feel kind of betrayed??? I mean he's the definition of "emotionally fucked up". And he trusts you to open up about his emotions that he refuses to admit he has! And then you just hurt him with them :( ouch

you better apologize or tell him your joking.

[lillyspeakz]

Im sorry Im ranting to you, literally past 2am for me but something I've noticed a lot about Shubble's fanbase is that its aggressive as shit. Remember the 'cum bow' bit? Wilbur shot Shelby with his bow, and she was maybe on half a heart because she dies. The death message (or whatever you call it) was 'ShelbyYT was shot using cum' (something related to this). And Wilbur spent like the next ten to fifteen minutes apologizing for that.. Something that stood up to me was the chats. Wilbur's went 'aww he's sorry' and some were just 'LUL's. But Shelby's was, maybe jokingly, all violent with like 'peace was never an option', 'he must pay' or variations of that.

Im not saying that all of Shubble's fanbase is like that since a lot of the time, not all people tend to be bad people, and I understand if it was said as a joke but holy shit dude.. It just keeps repeating in my head over and over again whenever I see hate on Wilbur. I feel like a bad person for not supporting Shubble yet I feel like I could physically function better if she provides any proof. Again, sorry for ranting, I hope you're doing well!!

-🦐

Your all good dearest. I agree with you, I feel that at any given time , if someone is slightly mean or if something happens to Shelby, her fan base attacks the other person, joking or not. I never liked Shelby. I will forever say that. She just reminds me of someone who tries to hard- like it’s annoying. Sorry if that’s mean but my opinion. And when she does or says things, I feel like she’s just trying to get attention (not saying she accused wil for attention!!)

Once I have proof, I’ll feel more comfortable and decide where I fit- but so far there is absolutely zero evidence that wil did that. Now we can’t account for the others but.

I completely agree

[blkkizzat]

Drop the hoe days lore 🤲 let me live through you

oh gawd lmfaoooo.

y'all want vegas stories? ive been like 8 times.

i got a story for y'all...its kinda funny dhfkldsfhjalksj.

so one of these times we were at ghost bar at the palms. it was like 2am so my friends with boyfriends went back to the hotel and me and my hoe friend stayed out. so at the time i had a HUGE crush on tom hiddleston bitch, like i wanted that man badddd. lmfao anyway so i see this guy and i nudged my hoe friend and was like "oh shit girl i know im rollin in the deep right now but this man look like tom hiddleston" and she did not see it but idgaf cause she didnt even think tom hiddleston was attractive lmfao. so i waited until the girl he was dancing with went somewhere with her friend then i immediately go up to him and start dancing with him. i mean there was no hi, it was just me throwing ass on my target grade tom hiddleston (literally cause this man was from kentucky). that was my mans for the night i did not care. lol so he has a friend my friend was into and so we all are dancing and they get us more drinks. so around 4 they were like "y'all wanna come back".

and in vegas i was on demon time. i promise im not forward at all usually but vegas does something to me and i get aggressive. because this guy was like "oh we have weed at our hotel room" and without messing a beat i said "don't get too high you can't fuck me." (BITCH WUT IS WRONG WITH MEEEEEEEE LOLODJOFJSDLFJSZ). This man was stuttering after, he did not know what tf to say lmfaooo. Honestly we didn't even smoke now that i think about it. him and his friend had two queens so we just turn off the lights and get to it once we get in. ngl he didnt have a monster dick or anything but it was above average and THICC, and more than i thought he would be packing for sure. we wore a condom initially but this man legit begged me to take it off cause he said i was so wet he got super whiny so i caved 😩

so anyway he has my ankles on his shoulders then all of a sudden we hear (i dont remember her exact words but it was something like) "OH MY GOD!!!OH MY GOD!!!—WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?? IT DOESN'T GO THERE!" Then my friend gets up and runs to the bathroom and shuts the door. THIS DUDE HAD MY FRIEND IN PRONE BONE AND STUCK IT IN HER BUTT DRY ON ACCIDENT CAUSE HE WAS SO DRUNK. LIKE NOT JUST A POKE FULLY INSIDE.😭😭😭😭😭😭

Mannnnn i was cutting tf up. i dont think i ever laughed so and been fucking at the same time, we was both laughing and still fucking dkfhaskfja. after we calm down after a few min he kinda slows down and asks me if i wanna go check on my friend and i was like "nah shes a big girl— let me ride you" this man forgot about her quickly 😭and then his drunk ass friend started throwing up but we still didnt stop.

then my friend comes out of the bathroom. (i never stopped riding this man) and shes like "i wanna go" and i was like "okayyyyy". chile i went to the bathroom he followed me and we fucked for another hour on the toliet seat and on the counter dhfakjdhsfasjkh (i aint shit lmfao)

and he STILL wanted to fuck me after we left the bathroom but i felt bad for my friend lol who was like already dressed and the room kinda smelled like puke then, plus i didnt want her walking back to our hotel by herself at like 5:30am lol (and tbh my coochie kinda hurt from how thick this man was). so i got dressed. we left then went to mcdonalds, dont worry i bought my hoe friend mcdonalds as an apology for not leaving sooner so im not a completely horrible friend 😩.

he definitely texted me the next night but we had an early flight the next day or i would have went back.

[cupoftaae]

Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ fondness (chapter 16)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 5-6k

warnings- swearing, mentions of miscarriage, tae is sad sad, kaito is back, drinking, um i think thats all? lmk if not!

a/n- Lovies!! hi i hope ur all doing good. Im trying to write a lot more because i literally just quit my current job (they treated me like shit) after 2 months. Im applying to so many places rn but in the meantime im having fun giving my tumblr a little luv <3 also apologies for any mispellings, I had read over my previous chapters and cringed at some of the words I spelled wrong. I have been learning english for years now but apparently its still not to a 100, oh well! Anyways, please enjoy! -Nini <3

"I had my suspicions"

You blushed, eyes down on your water bottle as you sat in your childhood bed again, your mother sat comfortable at the end of it as you both talked.

You arrived back home around 2am yesterday, and to say that you already felt a little better was an understatement.

"you did?" you mumbled as your mother nodded, smiling.

"when you came to visit a while ago, I saw a lot of touchiness" she giggled "but I minded my business"

"ah this is embarrassing" your hands flew to cover your face, now knowing your own mother knew about your relationship before you could say anything.

"no, I dont think so" she hummed, looking at the carpet. "I just know when a boy is in love, i remember your father-"

you inhaled sharply at her words, biting your lip and looking away.

"-...he would always look at me like I was the center of the universe"

You stayed quite for a moment before speaking up softly, "what happened?"

She smiled sadly, "he chose a different life, and I resented him for so long, but I accept it for what it was, and now that I have..I feel like im free to live again. And thats what you need to do, accept it, accept whats happened." she whispered, calming voice infiltrating the bedroom at such a late hour of the night.

Your eyes met hers, a glimmer of love was bright enough to see through her dark brown orbs. You nodded as she began to speak again,

"Taehyung and you.....I always knew it would happen" she giggled, "I remember once you guys hit middle school, and the moment I caught you sneaking into my closet for makeup before he came over to play video games-"

"oh god, stop" you blush, shaking your head

"it was cute even if you wouldnt admit it" your mother waved her arm at you.

You hummed, crossing your arms over your chest as you got lost in thought.

"so, how is he taking everything?"

"taehyung?"

she nods, eyes burning a laser into yours.

"well...i dont know" your answer was honest as she sat up.

"what do you mean?"

You sighed once more before speaking, "he and I kinda argued before I left paris...im an asshole mom" you offered a sad laugh, looking down. "im an asshole...because, I got mad at him for trying to help"

She tilted her head, listening, "Im sure he just wanted to be there for you, he was hurting as much as you"

"i know, and thats the thing mama...but I just needed to be alone and away....and he got mad when I expressed it...its not like we are married" you roll your eyes

she giggles, "I understand my dove, but listen" she grabbed your hands, "things like this happen all the time, we cant run away from our loved ones when life gets bad. What happened between you both was terrible, and im so sorry sweetheart" she whispered, your own eyes getting a bit misty, "but running back home isnt gonna do anything"

You nodded before smiling, "I came here because its comforting, you're comforting.....now you're scolding me?" your voice had humor.

She laughed, "you are a 23 year old woman, I cant control your actions, like whether you stayed with Taehyung or came back to me, however I can tell you my opinion, and if your decision was right or wrong, not trying to guilt you, just being a mom"

You nod slowly, fidgeting with the heating pad sitting on your stomach to help ease the lasting cramps that only served as a painful reminder.

"you make your own choices hun, but...let me ask you this, do you love him?" she whispered

Your eyes shot up at her, your heart singing with sadness yet love.

"....yeah.." you whispered so quietly it was barley heard. "yeah I do" you couldnt help but begin to cry as she wrapped you into her arms.

A mothers loving embrace.

It could heal all, and this is exactly why you came back.

"You find comfort here, but as you get older, you need to find comfort in new things." your mother began, " life is scary, but its all about changing. Without change, life would be rather boring, huh?" her hands ran up and down your back as your face rested on her shoulder. "Taehyung has been here forever, youve grown together, but these new feelings? they offer new experiences,...amazing ones too. Im sure he loves you just as much, thats why he let you go..." she whispered, "but my dear, you have to fight through the darkness to find the prize, to find why you had the connection at all"

You were full on Niagara falls into your mothers sweater. Her words provided insight, but as well as pain. You shouldnt have left him behind, it was wrong, and you hoped he understood.

you realized that you were your fathers daughter, and not just in DNA. Your first instinct was to run away from your loved ones, run away from family when they would give you everything.

You were becoming your father.

And you hated how much you still loved that man even if he left you. and you hate that you take after him in such painful ways.

But most of all...you hate how you didn't even see it happening.

"shh" your mother cooed, holding you as she rocked back and forth slowly. "my child, life will settle, but you need to find your way, and if thats with him, you need to tell him"

"i know" you whispered, wiping your eyes as you clutched the tiny bear you packed.

The bear.

Fuck, you wish you didnt bring it in your suitecase.

It was the teddy bear taehyung bought the day after finding out you were pregnant, The perfectly placed initial on the middle that always made you remember he thought of you as a Kim, as well, even if you werent married.

It was a reminder he wanted you in any way he could grasp you.

As a girlfriend, a mother to his child, eventually a wife, but always....always his best friend in life.

Your mother looked down at the bear, smiling. "y/n..."

"hm?" you mumbled, leaning back as she put your hair behind your ears.

"im so sorry this happened to you" her voice was quiet again, "you would have been a beautiful mother....and if you decide to have kids in the future, thats exactly what youll be"

You nod sadly, "thank you...."

It was quiet for a moment before she spoke up again, "when I was in my twenties, your father and I decided to try and have another child..we saw how you clung to your pre-school friends and called them your sisters" she chuckled "so we thought maybe another baby would be good. Well- I got pregnant right before your 4th birthday" her voice choked softly as you watched, this being news to you.

"unfortunately I, too, had lost it" she teared up explaining the situation. "it was one of the most painful things I ever went through....but looking back at it" she smiled at you gently, rubbing your back, "im so greatful"

"grateful?" you whispered, in shock

"I had you, my little best friend whos always stuck by me even in the worse situations...you never had to fight for my attention, we were always together"

You wiped her tears as you smiled sadly, agreeing.

"and you have always been more than enough." she mumbled, "so my love, I guess the lesson here is...that once you learn to accept it and know the situation for what it is.....you'll heal"

You hugged her tightly as her words struck your chest with a great force.

She was right, whether you liked her advice or not, shes been through exactly what you have, and if she can make it out and be such a wise, resilient woman today, than you can too.

But you'll be damned if its in the steps of your father.

Later after she went to bed, you were left alone, the covers up to your neck as the tv played some old school tv show that only got airtime in the late hours of the night.

You found your hand resting on top of your stomach as you laid calmly. You had to acknowledge it to get past it. "im not pregnant anymore..." you whispered, feeling an overwhelming sadness fulfill you. Your eyes drew down to your hand as you rubbed your stomach, feeling a bit stupid at what you were doing.

taking a few deep breathes, you opened your eyes and looked up at the ceiling, "its okay to be sad....its okay to cry" you remind yourself aloud, voice quiet and shaky, "but I can heal....its not my fault" you nod, tears falling for the millionth time within the past few days.

You were exhausted, mentally and physically, but after tonight you feel like perhaps you made a breakthrough, you were proud of yourself even if it was just a baby step.

You turned over in bed to look at your phone, the time was 3:55 am, yikes.

You barley had time to register it before the lock screen caught your attention, now all you could think about is how Taehyung was feeling.

-

"why are you already back?"

"dude just give me my fish and dog so I can go" Taehyung mumbled, standing at the front of his friend Jin's apartment.

He laughed and turned away for a moment before returning with Hae swimming around in his tiny tank, the packet of food wedged underneath jins chin. "here"

Taehyung took the bowl and the food, nodding "thanks..."

"mhm" he smiled, "so wheres Y/N? The last thing you posted was a photo of her standing on the edge of some fountain, did you push her into it?" he snorted, trying to be light hearted with his friend.

"no shes just, busy I guess" he shrugged, trying to leave quickly, "wheres yeontan?"

Jin looked behind him and picked up the small dog, putting the leash on him securely before handing it to taehyung, who took it with his free hand.

"thanks for not killing my pets and taking care of them, even if it was probably Stephanie who did everything" taehyung referred to Jin's wife, who stood behind him with a wide grin of acknowledgment. "i'll see ya" he nodded before turning down the hall to leave, Yeontan leading the way on his leash.

Taehyung walked on the sidewalk, his feet finding the familiar path to his own apartment.

He left Paris a day and half after you did, only communicating with you through occasional texts that left much to the imagination when it came to how you were doing.

He unlocked the door and walked in, wincing at how messy you two left it before leaving. His hands gently put Hae down on the kitchen counter as he began to pick laundry up, tossing them into a ball and making a mental note to do a washing load this weekend.

Tae checked his phone for any sign of you, frowning when he was met with 0 notifications.

Would it be wrong to call you? he didnt know anymore, things felt awkward...you left with no closure or definitive answer on what was okay or what crossed the boundaries.

It definitely felt uneasy being alone in the apartment, he missed your loud laughing, and the good food you always made for him.

He even missed when you would force him to watch shitty reality shows with you because it meant he got to cuddle with you on the couch for a few hours.

The rumbling sound of his stomach knocked him out of his head as he turned to the kitchen. There wasnt much, other than a few now rotten bananas sitting on the counter.

His hand gripped the fridge handle as his eyes were met with an ultrasound photo hung up by a hello kitty magnet, it felt like salt was poured into his wound...his hand slid off the handle. he wasnt hungry anymore.

Beside the photo was doctors reports hung up for upcoming appointments and reminders.

This upcoming weekend was supposed to be the gender reveal. Deep down Taehyung didnt care if it was a boy or girl, but not that he'd be having neither, it felt more upsetting.

It was a reminder of something that he might never get to experience with you.

He found his way to the kitchen counter, sitting in the quiet room as yeontans tiny pitter-patter paws echoed through the apartment wood flooring.

Taehyungs eyes were drawn to hae, the tiny yellow fish swimming around in his spongebob tank, a toy pineapple placed perfectly in the center for him. For some reason he teared up.

suddenly he felt the urge to hear from you, but he felt selfish for doing so. You should be the one to reach out, right?

He didnt know anymore.

"oh hae....I miss mama" he sighed, leaning down to rest his head in his crossed arms over the table.

-

"are you gonna just sit in bed?" your mothers voice echoed into your room, the lights were off and the curtains were closed as two large blankets covered your body....it was noon.

"I'll get out soon"

She shook her head, leaning against the door frame "Hun, I need to go shopping, I need to know you are up and alive before I leave you here alone"

Reluctantly you sat up, wiping your sleepy eyes as nostalgia from high school mornings hit you.

"there she is!" your mom cheered, directing her cat to follow over to you as she turned to leave.

You smiled at it as you stretch, "hi baby" your voice cooed before turning over and unhooking your phone from the charger

2 notifications

"oh" you mumbled, quickly unlocking it and going to your texts. You wish it was Taehyung, unfortunately it wasnt...

Kaito: hey, I know this is sort of inappropriate to text you like this, I get it, but I cannot stop thinking about you. I cant stop thinking about the baby. Can we please talk about maybe getting a paternity test?

you frowned, petting the cat as she climbed into your lap

kaito: and I know btw that you dont want me to be the father figure, which is fine. Ive taken time to understand that...however i need to know if its mine, I cant live without knowing y/n. please call or text.

Oh thats just great, another person you had to break the news to.

Your mother came back down the hall, knocking on the door frame "so are you coming or not? im leaving" she smiled

"I'll stay here, thanks though mama, hows your back?"

She waved her hand in dismissal "oh im fine honey, I got my brace"

You smiled sympathetically as she turned to leave, knowing she was probably lying about the pain.

Shes always been stubborn, thats where you get it from.

After getting cleaned up a bit, you made your way outside to sit on the front deck, propping your phone up as you sit in the rocking chair. Were you really about to facetime Kaito?

....guess so...

After a few rings, you began to feel the tightness in your chest...the anticipation...the nervousness...

"hello?" his voice echoed through your ears, for some odd reason you felt like crying already.

"hey....are you at work?"

"on break" he smiled softly, eyes looking into yours through the phone screen. It felt odd to sit here on call with him, you havent done it since you both had been dating.

"so..."

He sat down, propping the phone up against a wall as he watched you, making it clear he was ready to talk. "listen, please understand this isnt me trying to make my way back into your life"

You nod, picking at the skin around your fingernails.

"I just want to know if its mine is all, I mean, I figured theres a chance it is, no? so this is warranted right? i dont want to seem pushy...."

You sigh, looking at him, "um, well I called you because I wanted to discuss everything"

"what do you mean?" his head tilted softly

"kaito, I uh, I lost the baby" you said aloud, nodding as you did so. In some way, the words left your mouth a lot easier than just a few days prior.

You were knee-deep in the healing process

"oh." was all he responded, his face appearing confused and unsure, "you lost the...baby?"

"miscarriage" you add, "it happened a few days ago, I never had the chance to tell whether it was yours or taehyungs"

He frowned, "y/n, im sorry"

"dont apologize its fine, im fine"

"god...."he ran his hands over his face, obviously deeply upset by the news.

"its okay" you assured again as he watched you for a moment,

"do you think it was mine? genuinely?" he whispered

You shrugged, eyes dragging away from the screen to look at the cars driving past the house "I dont know"

You did, you were 90% sure it was taehyungs, this was decided last night as you carefully calculated the dates between periods, and the breakup vs when you and taehyung got together.

If it was kaitos, that would have meant you were close to being 5-6 months pregnant, and at the time of the miscarriage, you were about 3-4.

regardless, it was still upsetting, and in hindsight, it didnt matter anymore especially when you had to sit and break everything down to your ex.

He sighed again, "how are you managing?" he whispered

"im good, im at my moms house right now"

"wheres taehyung?"

you scoffed slightly, even after telling him the situation he only cared about you and taehyung. "Kaito I called to inform you about the baby and the baby alone, we dont need to discuss my personal life, you dont get to know information that no longer involves you"

He sat watching you for a moment before nodding "okay....sorry?"

"thank you for being understanding during this, and all I ask is that you continue to be respectful to not only me, but taehyung"

He rolled his eyes slightly "okay"

"okay" you repeated, sitting near the phone, "well...thats all I suppose, text me if you have more to discuss on the topic, have a good shift"

with that, you hung up and couldnt help the slight smile that popped up on your face, you finally stuck up for yourself, and taehyung

It felt good.

so good that you almost called taehyung out of instinct.

would he be okay with that?

you decided against it, putting your phone away as you sat back and swayed in the rocking chair.

-

Taehyung gently creaked open the door of what used to be his bedroom, but was now reserved in the space of a future nursery.

He hadnt been in here in a while, and now as he sets his eyes on it all, he wishes he didnt walk in.

There were boxes of items you ordered online piled up in the corner, he smiled sadly and looked through them.

The crib you bought, he promised he would put it together for you, you were never good at building things, instructions or not.

The thought made him giggle softly as he looked at the other things, the vanity and picture frames. The familiar grief found its way into his chest as he went over and laid on the rug in the center of the room.

It was a lilac purple rug, you picked it out and decided the nursery will be just that color scheme, regardless if it was a girl or not. His fingers weaved through it as he began to cry, eyes scanning over the room that will forever be empty, items put to waste. The small bundle of baby toys that never get to be played with.

He never realized just how much he was hurting, but he had to say not having you at his side made it sting even more.

Yeontan nudged his way into the room and grabbed one of the stuffies, making his skilled exit quickly as taehyung got up

"hey! thats not yours!" he frowned and chased out of the room after the small dog, following him around the living room before running into your room. He gave up and dropped the giraffe by your desk, his tiny legs leading him away to hide.

Taehyung kneeled to pick it up, unable to help the way his eyes scanned over the items on top of your desk.

Unorganized homework for school, binders left open and messy, he smiled a bit at it as he walked over, his arm accidentally pushing some of the books off the side.

"shit" he sighed, leaning down to pick them up.

There was a smaller brown notebook that caught his attention, he didnt want to snoop around your things, but when the front of it says "to my love", its pretty hard to ignore.

He carefully sat on the ground and opened it, feeling wrong for doing so but unable to stop.

The first page was full of your handwriting.

May 11th

so...today I just found out the biggest news of my life. im pregnant, its weird to even write. I just bought this notebook at the flea market because I need to tell someone. Im really scared, and im unsure of what you will think of me. I love you a lot, and I hope I get the chance to gift this to you after all is said and done

suddenly he felt like he was doing something wrong, reading something forbidden.

He scanned over the next page quickly, seeing how you spoke about dedicating this as a future love note for him, a chance to let him see inside your mind.

He tossed it back on top of your desk and sighed softly, he missed you so much and it seems like every second only let that feeling grow.

He wasnt sure what position you two were in, but he loved you dearly, probably a lot more than a person should love another human being.

He hoped you felt the same deep and burning desire.

Thoughts passed into his brain, he realized he was grateful you went through the crazy process of the past few years, in which referred to the friends with benefits situation.

If it never happened, you would have never been this close now.

Little does he know, that miles away from Busan, you laid on the floor of your room too, looking over older texts between the two of you and giggling

even if it was about groceries, or a small message asking him to pick you up from class, it made you smile.

Taehyung and your mom have been the only ones that you can say have never left you, the only ones who are there when you need them.

were you going to let him go over something that can be talked over and fixed?

you looked out the window and silently spoke,

"i'll see you soon”

-

Going back to your old doctor in Gwangju was an odd experience, you had too have been no older than 18 the last time you visited her.

“It seems that everything is going smoothly, and you said you’ve stopped bleeding?”

You nod, fidgeting with the gown you put on as the doctor wrote down everything.

“Your tests seem good, i would say you are coming along healthily after this, which is a good thing, right?” She smiles cheerfully, “do you have any questions for me?”

You shrug, looking up at her “I don’t really know”

She sighed and sat down “y/n, what you went through would be hard on anyone. You are so young and you already are stressed with work and college, and this being thrown on top had to have been difficult right?”

You nod, resting your head in your palm.

“Do you think seeing a therapist would be helpful to you?” She asked sweetly

You quickly sat up “well…im going back to Busan eventually and-”

“I can contact your doctor in Busan and have them find you a therapist”

You sighed deeply, therapy was something you never really considered. Would it help? Maybe. But bottom line was that you never liked discussing your problems, you have always been closed off and the thought of being vulnerable with some stranger is terrifying.

“Look y/n, I’ll send your doctor a note and you can discuss it with her once you go back, how about that?”

You nod reluctantly ��okay….”

-

Once you arrived back with your mother at the house, she began to cook something up for lunch as you laid on the couch, cuddling the cat.

She purred in your lap, making you smile.

"how was the appointment?" your mom spoke from the kitchen, peaking over to you as her hands chopped veggies up on a cutting board.

"well...It was fine I suppose"

"just fine?" she smiled, adjusting her glasses, "did she say anything bad?"

"no, no, nothing bad, but just...she wants me to do this therapy thing and I just-"

"oh that sounds like a good plan...I think therapy would be beneficial"

You sigh, looking down at the cat, "well I probably wont be doing it so..yeah"

She stopped cutting, looking over at you "and why is that?"

You simply shrug in reply

"you know theres nothing wrong in getting help...right?"

"yeah but im not sure im ready to go talk to someone yet"

She laughed softly, "thats when you should talk to someone, when you are unsure, get it out before its all locked up"

sitting up a bit, you look back at her, "I guess, I dont know, we will see...."

Your eyes returned back to the tv in front of you as your mother continued to create a meal for the two of you. As a mom, she felt defeated, she knew the other alternative here but knowing you, the reaction may be less than ideal.

The last thing she wants to do is interfere with your current situation, but hey.....

what is a mom if she isn't nosey?

taglist!-

@turnthepageandbeburnt @taebangtanbabe @borahaexoxo @lelefoodlover @tan-veee

[nobodysdaydreams]

ALL ABOARD TO TRUTH TOWN🚂 , WHERE FICTIONAL STORIES ABOUT SHINY BUTTONS, DONUTS, AND ROBOT UPRISINGS ARE MORE FUN THAN CUTTER'S STUPID SLOW CLAPS, HERA ALMOST DYING (she BETTER not), AND DOUG'S JAIL TIME AND ALCOHOLISM THAT I TOTALLY PREDICTED (good for me 🥰) (or my reaction to episodes 38-40 of Wolf359)

Also: Whiskey boy needs to chill, seriously. Are we sure Doug is the one with the problem?

Welcome back dear readers. Thanks again for your patience. Excited to continue with my season 3 reactions!

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Episode 38: Happy Endings

I'm gonna be doing chores while I listen to these three episodes, so sorry if the notes get a bit brief.

This Hilbert and Doug morality debate is funny because it's literally one actor debating with himself.

I'm sad Hera can't be a part of the group.

"2am"? How is it 2am? You're...you're not on earth. I understand keeping up with a schedule, but it's still a little weird, what time zone are they following?

The way Hilbert talks about Sam... it's like he has this shred of humanity left inside him that he's just gotten used to ignoring.

And Hilbert, I have a clear answer to your little "trolley problem": the decima virus is CUTTER'S property. He put that in your contract, or have you forgotten? Do you seriously think that man will be using it for the good of humanity? Because I don't.

I also feel like the "No one gets a happy ending/ there are no happy endings" think is foreshadowing. But I hope I am wrong.

"This wasn't here last time"

IS THIS THAT WEIRD DOOR???? FINALLY! Bah-ha just shove him in! At least it’s not the airlock which is what I was expecting.

Hm. Do not like the dark. Uh what. Also. Isn’t he supposed to be alone? Totally alone? And shouldn’t it be an emergency?

Dentist chair from hell? Nope. Don’t like it.

Recorded message? Oh gosh not the slow claps…Cutter no doubt. Of course he does a dramatic dark room, and the lights go up on an evil chair...he was one of those kids in school who at recess would find insects and torture them for fun, wasn't he?

Easter egg? Cutter, this is the worst easter themed scavenger hunt I've ever heard of. Where are the chocolate bunnies? The jellybeans? The message of hope, love, and rebirth? But I suppose I should expect nothing else from the man who ordered the killing of three people on Christmas. Makes you wonder what Cutter has against holidays. Did mommy and daddy not give someone enough presents?

“The other crew has... gone away like last time” Cutter you suck. Seriously his villain mode does not have an off switch.

What does Cutter want with his brain? An old friend made this for him?? Is it the dude he killed or is it the Pryce person he wrote the book with? Makes me wonder where his mysterious friend is hiding. In the shadows at Cutter's right hand or six feet underground with a knife in the back? Not sure which is worse. I guess we'll see.

THEY CAN SCAN HIS BRAIN AND GET THAT KIND OF INFO? That...but...I...as someone who knows slightly more than average about how the brain works, Cutter needs to learn how to make better use of his tech. I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how much better his evil plans would go, if he focused on THAT instead of...oh I don't know...investing his money into elaborate dark rooms with evil dentist chairs and slow clap videos?

Also "Hera can't detect these secret rooms" HOW. HOW CAN SHE NOT THAT'S AN AWFUL IDEA: She flies the ship, she has to calculate for its size. It's science fiction, so let me be 100% clear, I'm not dumping on the creators or writers, I'm dumping on Cutter the character. You idiot.

Oh he’s just leaving him in space. Oh...Hilbert will come around in the hopes that he’ll use decima to help people. That's cruel. “Thanks for all the memories” Cutter. DUDE. Too much.

Do not give him your memories. Do not Hilbert.

Haha… hee hee… why is he laughing?

Brilliant? Chance for work to continue? NO. HILBERT YOU DUM-DUM. THEY ARE NOT GOING TO USE IT FOR GOOD. CUTTER WILL NOT USE IT FOR GOOD. BECAUSE HE IS NOT A GOOD MAN. The reason you shouldn't do this has nothing to do with sacrifices for the great good...it's that the greater good IS NOT GUARANTEED AND LIKELY DOESN'T EXIST BASED ON CUTTER'S BEHAVIOR!

Don’t call her Isabel. You are in the wrong here Hilbert. And there is a very clear difference between what she is doing and what you are doing. She knows better than to count on a killer for benevolence.

Good. Smart. Don’t get in the chair. It would probably slice off your head or something.

Something about Eiffel? Minkowski… Doug is your friend. Just because he served time doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy.

Well Lovelace and Hilbert...it's an unusual alliance. Hope it works out.

Episode 39: All Things Considered

"It's a bottle…"

👎🙅‍♂️🤬❌ WRONG!

Oh it's the Whiskey isn't it.

Wrong! Cancelled! 🤬👎🙅‍♂️❌

Oh my gosh Kepler shut up.

Of course duck boy knows the boss’s drinks. Teacher's pet.

“YOU VILLAGE IDIOTS!…🤬... but points to you Jacobi 😏🥰👍" okay… clearly discount Cutter has his own discount Kepler.

oh I love these stories. Why do I feel like Minkowski's is gonna be the most realistic. Like, I can see Doug making lightsaber noises, and I can see Jacobi being a little arrogant. Just...maybe a little exaggerated.

Oh my gosh Jacobi's story. 😂😂😂 The way he's portraying Doug is way too much.

“But the button is so shiny! 🥺” PFFT- the way Jacobi portrays Doug... I'm sorry for laughing but it's too funny😂

He’s doing Minkowski dirty. Why is he making her talk like a valley girl?

“I’m sorry Jacobi you were right!” / “I’m just gonna lean against this big red button!”

Duck boy who do you think you’re fooling with this one 😂

I cannot wait for Doug's story.

Yes, Doug I am ready for the truth. I am so ready. I AM READY!

I love Hera’s announcement: "Uh...yeah some stuff is happening today for sure"

“The innocent victim stepped in to help” why is Doug me telling a story.

“We’ve never high-fived!” “We’re headed to truth town!”

Heck yeah we are! All aboard to truth town Doug, this is the best story yet!

Why are they like fighting elementary school children? I love this. Dang Doug is roasting them!

“Oh thank goodness Doug you saved us 🥰”

"Minkowski decked him!" "I did not!" "Duck boy passed out" "I did not!" "But then Hilbert came. Russian's are drawn to loud noises and he wanted to experiment on Jacobi's brain."

Doug, if you made a fictional podcast about your time in space I would listen to it. It sounds amazing.

Why is Minkowski doing a different accent now? WHY IS HERA THE VILLAIN SUDDENLY DOING A ROBOT UPRISING? 😂

"Is there any truth to your story?" Um...yeah? I'm pretty sure there were donuts in multiple stories Kelper 🙄

"But... but truth town! 🥺"

I agree. Doug was taking them straight to truth town and Whiskey boy shut down the railways. All because discount Cutter can't handle the truth. Big surprise.

“As I've mentioned...I like the feel of it IN MY HAND 😡”

Geez man okay.

And Doug's story was not a time waste. It was delightful. Just because discount Cutter is evil doesn't mean he has to be the fun police.

“Until your idiocy stretches all the way around back to half-way competent” dang I really am like Doug. 😔

Episode 40: Limbo

"Lob of meat" well you don't have to say it like that Hera.

"I can't think of a single way to prank everyone else" Doug. Jacobi is afraid of ducks. You are sitting on a gold mine.

Ugh this is awful because I can't tell if Hera's compliance with Maxwell is programmed or not! It's so scary that her free will can just be...programmed out.

Maxwell. Why are you interrogating her? Hera. Do not turn on your friends. Maxwell. You BETTER be trying to help.

I'm very worried about Hera. Is Kepler going to shut her down?

Good on you Hera. She deserves to know the truth.

...oh no.

Maybe I'm misremembering this, but was it Maxwell or Lovelace who said "if only Hera knew the truth" a few episodes back? I'm really suspicious about how Cutter and co. treat the AIs and what they want with them.

Hera. Talk to Doug about it. Just let him know you're scared. He'll be there for you.

Hera please let your friends help you. Please let them help you. AND LEAVE HERA ALONE STOP OVERWHELMING HER! She clearly has...whatever the AI equivalent of anxiety is.

I feel so bad for Hera. I swear. Whatever Cutter has planned for her...he will pay for this.

Hera offline? NOOOOOO...

Maxwell you kinda got in her head.

But everyone has problems. And Hera is more than a robot computer. She's a friend. You can't just shut her down!

I KNEW IT. A panic attack. She has anxiety 🥺. Poor Hera.

What's dummy program? Would they destroy Hera's freewill? Neanderthal version of AI? No. Maxwell no. You don't get it. Hera is a friend. Oh they don't get it. They think it's a companion to her, not a replacement for her.

DO NOT DO IT. THANK YOU DOUG! YES! THANK YOU DOUG!

I need Whiskey Boy to drown in his own whiskey. And I need Hera to be okay. You can't do this to me. You already took Blessie you monsters. YOU ALREADY TOOK BLESSIE!

Maxwell stand up to discount Cutter! "Don't forget what she is Maxwell. She went rogue and tried to escape. There's a reasons she's up here. She's expendable. Make sure that doesn't become you." YOU better make sure it's not YOU whiskey boy. Hera just wanted freedom! She didn't ask to be born!

Minkowski just tell him. Please tell him.

Yikes.

Minkowski don't make him go through this. Please stop.

Kidnapping isn't the worst part? That's...this doesn't sound like a fun story. This doesn't sound like a trip to truth town.

Right. His daughter. Baby Ann 🥺

Doug would make a good dad. Oh no. I predict that he had drug and alcohol issues!!! Oh he gets clean. Good for him. Oh no... Doug...relapse is bad.

Oh he loses Ann. HE KIDNAPS HER? Doug bad idea. People get put away for stuff like that.

NO HE CRASHED INTO SOME TEENS. ...Model UN president in a wheelchair?

The way he says "I was fine...the driver's always fine..." yikes. He made her deaf? He hasn't seen her since? How old was she?

Hera needs to be okay. And I'm sorry if they have the tech for sentient AI, decima viruses, space travel, and who knows what else, that weird brain transmitting machine, then deafness should be totally curable by now, Cutter's just hogging the tech to himself like a psychopath. I hate him. I hate him so much. Cutter is the worst. I hope HE loses his senses. Almost all his senses. Except for pain. That's the only one he deserves to keep.

I hope Maxwell can save Hera. She has to! Hera can't die now. We already went through that, and she deserves to be happy.

But I do get the feeling that might not happen. For anyone.

You know, as I go back and edit this, I gotta say, in some ways Kepler is like an evil version of Doug. They both clearly like alcohol and substances (Kepler's "I like the feel of it in my hand" and Doug's "I just want to hold the cigarette"), but Doug wants to get better while Kepler clearly doesn't. "You're like this Whiskey see? I'd be sad without it but I'd be okay." And then he risks the life of his crew for it. You sure you don't have a bit of problem Whiskey boy? 👀

And that's all folks! Thanks dear readers for coming along on my journey. Sorry for the delays in reactions. Life gets busy, but I try to do at least once a week for you guys.

[allieebobo]

Just wanna say that i shed a tear or two reading merry crisis. Like your writing is so damn delicious and immaculate, I got introduced to you through the tennis story and i realized that you have a side wip aboht merry crisis and i decide to read it cause like, why not. AND I SHED TEAR. LITERAL TEARS MAN. MY PILLOW IS WET CAUSE OF IT. and its because of nat route at the chp 3 where we call them like jdnsisjdosnsosnsosnsksn my heart. I cant. love nat even though their route broke my heart :"""""" and qiu too like- why so cute. Madam why you make if games that makes my heart breaks, either from fluff or angst. Miss, madam, queen, I just want to say on how much i enjoy merry crisis is and I shall put my words on the tennis if once im done through it. Your writing is damn good and i just love all of it, the eay you write it and I be able to experience the story your telling is like. So amazing of you, as someone who doesnt know anything about tennis, reading the tennis if is kinda like a maze but i somehow got it from your explanation like- maam how does it feel to have such a briliant brain (I love complimenting people with that line).

Thats all I got to say, I apologize of the typos that is gonna be there. Maybe its the lack of sleep that lead me into being a lil emotional that i write this. But just so you know, that paragraph i gave you is what my heart trying to formulate a praise and my love for you created into sentence  <3

Also reading your wips makes me wanna write like you despite not having any writing skills before hand, its that good know. Your writing. Its that amazing your wips. Makes me want to write beautifully like yours <3

Have a great day dear author<3333

AWWWW OMG ANON you cannot believe how happy this ask makes me!!

Ahh goddamn it always is so cool to have yall discover and enjoy both WIPs. And lying horizontally weeping into a pillow while consuming media/interactive fiction is my absolute favorite 2am activity.

Thank you so much for this extremely kind message, and I wish you the best in your own writing endeavours!!! You can absolutely do it!! 💪 I would love to read, play, hype, or support what you create/write in whatever way I can :)

Hope you have a great week/what's left of the weekend ahead!! 💙 💜 💖

[gobstoppercowboy]

Okay so I finished watching Good Omens 2 last night and I just have so so many thoughts on **that ending** that I feel compelled to share even though no one’s gonna read it. (But it would be nice if someone took pity and did)

Spoilers below!

Okay. So.

The thing that literally kept me up last night and had me staring at the ceiling at 2am was Aziraphale’s “I forgive you” following the kiss.

Neil Gaiman (the brilliance that he is) has made it pretty clear that he wanted this line to be a multiplicity and to both confuse and invoke us as viewers to gather our own interpretation of the moment, and Aziraphale’s character at this point in the story, but that doesn’t mean that I’ve exactly … got my own solid interpretation, yet.

Initially, to me, giving the response of forgiveness implies that Aziraphale read the kiss from Crowley as some convoluted version of an apology. As if Crowley’s kiss was a messy “I’m sorry, but”, that Aziraphale just doesn’t know how to deal with or where to go with. We watch him stutter and struggle with himself before biting out his words of forgiveness — I don’t think it was said on a whim or by accident. I really believe that Aziraphale meant that “I forgive you” and had intended for it to land the way that it did. But I could be wrong, obviously.

However, what complicates this for the pair of them, is that I don’t think Crowley went into the kiss with any specific sort of meaning. He didn’t do it to replace words, especially not an apology. He’s adamant in his stances on Heaven and Hell and has been throughout the series — unapologetically so, which is the essence of who he is.

To me, the kiss was a “look at me, acknowledge me, see me for what I am” action from Crowley. He laid himself bare and put himself into the open — showing Aziraphale that this is his priority, that this is where he wants to be, and that under no circumstances will he be willing to return to Heaven for its ease or convenience, and never because it could be seen as the ‘right’ thing to do. It was Crowley telling him, “I don’t care what’s right and I don’t care what’s wrong. I care about this.” I’d say this is really emphasised by the physicality of the kiss — the grabbing of Aziraphale’s clothes, the forced prolonging of it.

It wasn’t an apology, and it wasn’t an “I love you”, either. I think it’s so important that that statement isn’t said aloud between the pair of them. Crowley has already expressed his love for Aziraphale in countless other ways that I don’t think I really need to recount. Crowley doesn’t struggle with showing Aziraphale that he loves him, what he struggles with is being open about what he wants to come from it — whereas, Aziraphale does not.

Aziraphale evidently wants their love to be able to translate as a catalyst for doing good, or saving humanity in Heaven, working together as Angels. He’s not trying to change Crowley from evil to good, because he already perceives him as being good — he just isn’t aware of how different the goodness is between them, and how much of an exception Aziraphale is to Crowley. Because, Crowley doesn’t care about doing ‘good’ or what’s ‘right’ — he just cares for what he knows to be true, or what he feels is important. It just happens that this regularly aligns with Aziraphale’s perception of ‘goodness’, because Crowley isn’t an evil person. Aziraphale aims to be ‘good’, Crowley aims to be true.

Crowley wants their love to manifest as a third party, in a way. He wants their love to be able to open doors for them, not confine them into one static room (ie: as he perceives Heaven, or Hell for that matter). Crowley doesn’t believe that their own personal freedom, and fighting for what they want, can intersect with the structure of somewhere like Heaven. But Aziraphale takes a more potentially naive stance on this, believing emphatically that it can because of their love for each other, because of their willingness to work together — not in spite of it, as Crowley does.

This then of course brings us to Crowley’s “don’t bother”.

This, I’ve struggled with unpicking a bit more.

As Crowley never meant his kiss as an apology, he’ll obviously interpret Aziraphale’s “I forgive you” in a different light.

It could be an effort to further reject the values of Heaven / religion in a wider sense; seeing forgiveness as one of those core Christian/‘good’ values that Aziraphale is constantly trying to measure up to or abide by. His “don’t bother” would therefore echo his utter exasperation with trying to understand Aziraphale’s determination to live by Heaven’s standard or rules, no longer caring if his bluntness hurts his feelings.

Or, Crowley could be highly aware of how his kiss was misunderstood by Aziraphale to mean an apology. Then, his “don’t bother” just highlights his disappointment in being so deeply misunderstood by someone who he cares so much for. He thought Aziraphale knew what he stood for and respected it — but this whole encounter has seemingly proved him wrong, thus Crowley’s defences have spiked again. After his monologue of vulnerability, of almost pleading with him, he forces himself back into himself. He chooses not to fight anymore, because if Aziraphale doesn’t agree with him immediately to begin with — then this isn’t a battle he wants to win. Because, above all, he wants Aziraphale to be happy. And if Crowley’s offer doesn’t bring him happiness, then he doesn’t want to force his energy arguing about it — and would rather just “not bother”, simply laying it all to rest and accepting his loss. If Aziraphale would be happier in Heaven, knowing that Crowley will never follow him, then so be it.

We immediately see Aziraphale panicking once Crowley leaves, leading me to believe that we’re probably gonna see some sort of apology arc in season three? But then again, the way Sheen acted Aziraphale in the elevator as the credits roll makes this maybe … not guaranteed? There was something very powerful going on in that little sequence. I think we’ll see new sides to Aziraphale’s character in season three.

Anyway! Going to try and wrap this up now before I embarrass myself even more.

Kind of TLDR: The kiss wasn’t an “I love you”, and it wasn’t an apology. We’re still yet to get either of these things (plainly and verbally) from Crowley and Aziraphale, but I suspect we’ll be getting them in season three.

[bluesgras]

hello lovely :D!! very very interested in ur au. and also ur art. that is some gorgeous drawing right there, nom nom. i’m curious, what crane wives songs inspired snapdragon? oh oh, and what made you name it that?

did anything else inspire ur au? are the turtles the same species as they are in the show, or different? oh! will there be a ton of angst? also also, i love the turtles’ designs!!

apologies if that was too much, or if these have been asked b4 ^^’, have a ggreat day!

who told you snapdragon was based on the crane wives. Is. is it that obvious? who do you work for heathen /j

first of all, thank you! Thank you so much for the ask, and the compliments! It means a lot. im glad people like my half coherent story rambles so much :D

[answers below the cut! buckle up fucklechucks this one's long]

what crane wives songs inspired snapdragon?

Still in shock I got this question to be honest. honestly, this entire au as a concept wasn't super clear at first, and I was looking up songs for inspiration. the entire outline to the whole au was written in 3 hours while listening to tongues and teeth, the moon will sing, and never love an anchor at 2am. quite possibly half the story is the vibe of those songs.

what made you name it (snapdragon) that?

There's a kind of funny story behind the name. Originally, snapdragon was the snapshot au instead! Thing is, I have a friend who also had a snapshot au, although, it's not tmnt related. I felt really bad, and convinced myself not to use that name. I wanted to keep the same vibe, though, which is why I settled on snapdragon instead!

also, look up the meaning of snapdragon flowers :]

did anything else inspire ur au?

I'm literally gonna list because there are so many.

Life Mission! The big one. I really liked the idea of leo being the one to bring everyone together, its such a fun concept to play with in my opinion.

also in the big ole inspiration pile:

The Eldest Brother

Bloodbath

Redline

Mutant Manhunt

Every Night the Longest Day

The Night

and so so SO many others!

are the turtles the same species as they are in the show, or different?

I get this question quite a bit! Yes, everyone is still the same species! I just changed around the designs and made each of the brothers more unique. donnie, in particular, is an albino softshell because I thought I'd be cool.

oh! will there be a ton of angst?

:]

[not a ton! this au is meant to be mostly wholesome, but it'll be there, believe me.]

[khiphop-discussions]

SMTM11 Diss Battle Ep.7 Part 1

Background for people who may not have seen the episode yet or aren't watching: This year there's 3 rounds. 2 1v1 rounds and then a 3rd and final 4v4, or team, battle. The producer's can be dissed too (I'mm 1000% sure this rule was EXPLICITLY included was just so that QM could say something to Justhis lol. But never forget that Mino did it first on SMTM4 without even being told he could).

So Team Grillz (Groovy Room x Lil Boi) will face Team Slay (Slom x Jay). The solo battles are: Noh Yunha vs Youngji & Xinsayne vs Blase

Team Quiolin (The Quiett x LeellaMarz) will face Team R-Jus (R.Tee x Justhis). The solo battles are NSW Yoon vs Khan & Don Malik vs QM.

This post won't include the Team Quiolin vs Team R-Jus battles yet!

Diss Battle (Grillz vs Slay) Commentary:

Gyujeong was making some smart ass remarks at the beginning! We would've had to fight LOL. He was hella mean.

As for the Youngji battle: Her main line to me was that Yunha's peak is battling her. Basically that's all he'll ever be known for.

Noh Yunha's punchlines didn't seem like they were landing well. There was multiple punchlines of Youngji's were it seemed like the crowd was like "ohhhhhh". The Layone one was the best imo and the crowd really reacted to it. He said something like "You'll never be the winner of SMTM11 just like you couldn't win Layone" or something similar. I liked when he said "Even if Youngji loses this battle, one of you (meaning: someone else on the team) is going home". I thought Yunha started off weak but ended stronger. He ended up winning. I think it was the Layone diss that sealed it.

Jay said during his interview before the winner was announced "Its Youngji so I think she can count on her popularity for votes" was SOOO infuriating. Because yes, he's right. But I find it SOOO annoying when people vote based on their faves instead of who they genuinely think did better. I don't think fans can complain about "connections hip-hop" if they are only gonna hype up artists who they already are fans of regardless of who really did better. It's giving "kpop fans who mass stream and buy bigger artists even when it's a trash song/comeback" vibes. (Just for clarity. I'm NOT upset with Jay here. I'm upset at the people who do that type of behavior).

Xinsayne says at thebeginning "We only held LA preliminaries this year but I heard we have a British contestant" (referring to Blase) and I literally LOL'd (quietly though cause it's after 2AM right now). He also called him Coogie's lackey. Xinsayne had some REALLY good insults but a lot of them didn't seem to land with the live crowd. The "Movin' & Movin'" reference (ties back to being Coogie's lackey) was a good one.

It turns out that people weren't able to catch Xinsayne's disses cause he (I'm guessing) said it to fast. Based on what the other teams backstage were saying. So unfortunate.

Anyway, Xinsayne made a diss about Blase's name at the end and he ended up apologizing right on the spot. Blase was named by his granddad so that's why LOL.

Blase: Blase started off strong. Called Polodared (eliminated contestant from Team Grillz on the prior episode) while he was in the crowd (I think it might've been pre-recorded and Polo was just playing along) and Goney (another former member of Team Grillz). Polo said "Isn't that sokodomo's lackey?" when asked if he knew info about Xinsayne. Goney said basically "I don't know him". The point was that he's basically unknown and in Sokodomo's shadow.

Blase starts off with a chorus about "Sokodomo's lackey" but he also calls Xinsayne "sokodomo's d**k rider" in that same chorus. I was like "Damn, Xinsyane gotta take that apology back now" lol. That one was STRONG.

Also, Blase had a line about how his real name is "YongJoon" and so it's dangerous and he shouldn't drive. This is a reference to No:el and his drunk driving incident. No:el was mad a Blase when it aired (don't know if they squashed it or not privately by now though). I'd have been mad too tbh. Blase ATE him up with that one lol. Other than that I don't remember much about Blase's diss.

Blase ended up winning. IDK who it would have went to if Xinsayne's lyrics were more audible. Maybe still Blase though because the chorus was pretty strong.

Grillz is up 2-0 at this point.

Finally the team battle: Youngji says in a pretend conversation with Jambino "They live in Korea but say 'Gang Gang' all day" LOL. Then a little later Toigo pulls out this doraemon character but that character is a meme in Korea because he looks like their delinquents (he has a leather pouch and sleeve tattoos. They gave Fleeky bang a leather pouch to carry). The character did look like Fleek Bang tbh LOL. I don't feel like the team overall had that many good/interesting disses though. Toigo was just loud and performance was energetic. It was a good performances more than a good diss imo. They mostly focused on Fleeky Bang which was their whole point.

The one line they said to Chillin Homie was that they are glad he is in good health. It's a sneaky diss to him leaving SMTM9 early for mental health as well as other...episodes...he had after the show. "Healthy Chillin Homie" (건강한질린호미 was the phrase Toigo chanted).

Team Grillz starts their diss. My favorite lyrics was when Chillin Homie told Toigo "Don't wear your hat like that (aka the way Toigo is wearing it), wear it like this (aka the way Chillin Homie is wearing it)". Homie's lyrics overall were kinda mean lol

Then they basically said they don't know who Jambino even is when they were listing off all the members to diss them. They called him "Jamjari" which is Korean is "Dragonfly" but it has the same first character as Jambino. Overall, Team Grillz diss was MEAN! They had a lot of mean disses. They weren't super witty imo but they were just MEAN. Which is exactly what I like to see in the diss battle.

However, Fleeky Bang fucked up his lyrics. IT was going soooo good but he messed up.

So in the end, Team Slay ended up winning the round but they won't that round so overwhelmingly that Team Slay ened up winning the whole thing but about 20 votes. I think Team Grillz had a chance to win. Their chorus was still really catchy and it was a good performance (not AS over the top as team Slay but I think their mean ass disses could have edged the performance element out).

At the end, Team Grillz had to eliminate someone. They naturally eliminated Fleeky Bang. He gave a sad version of his trending line "gang gang gang".

I'm gonna go watch the R.Jus vs Quiolin battle after I go eat (it's about 2:39 AM here and I haven't eaten dinner yet. I'm gonna go make a burger and I'll brb).

@lilsvt

[kakoiphonousangie]

My thoughts on LB6 (Arc 1)

My personal thoughts on Lostbelt 6 so far as I have been timegated and am so fucking hyped to see it come to fruition. I just wanted to collect my thoughts on it in a post. Apologies for lack of images I am doing this at 2AM and I need to get my feelings down.

From start to finish, I have been *very* into fucking world building, to the point where it is its only surpassed by its amazing character arcs! But regardless, I think the writers made a really good intro to suck you in first that makes you excited to be along for the ride.

The very first meeting you get of Fairy Britain is of rapscallion exiles who don’t have anything left to lose and are practically cockroaches of society. Even so they try their best to live out the rest of their lives, even if they cut it short themselves with the introduction of a human. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if that was a metaphor for all of Fairy Britain: a peaceful land eventually doomed to fail but with the introduction of one human cascades into an even worse fate filled with pain and suffering. 

I also love how differing area’s have differing politics on humans and what to do with them. Camelot and Salisbury seem intent to control humans, even if Salisbury’s leader thinks differently. (Hell, the disconnect is so much that I’m almost suspicious.) Norwich and Sheffield practically have fairies and humans side by side, although both of which is primarily motivated by an oncoming disaster. And then Gloucester is willfully feigning ignorance with neutrality, knowing that the only thing that matters is commerce. If you’re human, you’re a slave. A pet. A comrade in arms. A bargaining chip. And someone sticking through a disaster together with people.

Plus the introductions of various faeries make the world so much more lively. Especially the river fairies who lure people in with their wishes. That one in particular was really cool and made for a really good comedy bit.

And then the characters. GOD the characters. Every single main character has made a lasting impression on me, whether it be cool or immense, but intended, hatred. I especially love Castoria being fated to be this great hero but is the equivalent of throwing molotov cocktails at people. Also, at some point I noticed I didn’t know why Castoria was in the Amnesia Forest. Hm. I wonder if this is related to the crippling imposter syndrome she has over the entire Child of Prophecy thing and that it seemed like she let her entire hometown die. Sure would be bad if she tried to drown herself in amnesia so she could go back to being a regular hick! Regardless I will hype her up as much as possible and will kill everyone else in the room if they don’t cheer.

Anyways, moving on from Castoria, this is also very clearly supposed to be Mash’s time to shine and it fucking *shows*. Taking her away from Ritsuka and giving her own role to develop is so cool to see. Her absence is tangible, especially since she’s Ritsuka’s rock and they literally cannot keep themself in check without her as a support. Regardless, putting her with the scum of the earth (who aren’t true scum, just a little misguided and don’t know how to act) and making her still defend them at all costs is so good. She *is* a hero, a knight, Galahad’s very own Tam Lin to shield all that comes the way. It’s so satisfying to see her build herself back up and have something to stand for as Mash and not Chadea’s Demi-servant. (Also, I very much appreciate the buffs. Especially the np gain so i can fucking loop her np.)

And the fucking meetup with her and Ritsuka is SO FUCKING HYPE. Ritsuka, willing their command seals back (probably by sacrificing their of life force just to defy fate, i don’t think letting them know that was a thing they could do was a good idea) to triple boost a Lord Camelot is just. Fucking Incredible. Also giving THEM a monolouge not influenced by the player hit me so fucking hard because for once Ritsuka doesn’t feel like an insert MC. They’re a fully fledged maniac of their own and above everything they want to save their beloved Mash and the rest of Britain. (Granted, they never were just an insert, especially during lostbelt arc, but this takes it to a new level) And it makes it hurt all the more when Mash is taken away to Morgan. But also not to a point where the other Tam Lin know about her, at least Tristan. Very fascinating to me. Still satisfying to watch the hope drain from Guda’s eyes as their sanity plummets.

On the account of Oberon, I like him but sadly don’t have much to say about him expect REALLY loving his art and the writers making great stuff with his humor. Regardless, I like that he tries to care for Guda in his own way. Same thing with Muramasa, but with the added part of liking his like. Strict Grandpa relationship with the cast, with a soft spot for Artoria.

Comedy is also been top notch. From being owned by Artoria (which she seems a *wee* bit too excited by) to buying the Child of Prophecy (30% Chance), the writers hit home with nearly everyone. Plus, it helps a lot with getting some relief, especially after heavy hitters like the fall of Sheffield due to the Black Barrel and the loss of Tristan. 

All and all, this is by far my favorite chapter by a mile. I returned from a long ass hiatus just to sink my teeth into this and by god it delivered. Glad, I came back. And, while i was mainly trying to save for someone else later… I couldn’t help myself bringing home someone who I’m told is very good!

Till our next meeting, King of the Lostbelt! I hope you’re as good as people tell!

[bamboozled-distress]

It's me, hi, I'm the problem (it's me)

Summary: based on @/idiotinacostume's tiktok, sirius promises James a date with lily and when she refuses he improvises and.. chaos ensues

Read it on ao3 !

warnings: swearing, polyjuice potion, wolfstar not being a thing, yet anyway, you'll see, oh also this is a formal apology to all prongsfoot shippers because well, this is not very pro prongsfoot, james being helplessly in love with lily and me writing this at 2am so this will not be good like at all, also im changing this so that its like that episode of friends where chandler and pheobe go on that date and they try and kiss

"Wait, what?"

Sirius ran his hand through his hair again through pure embarrassment as they stood in the prefects bathroom together with Remus having his arms crossed and Sirius looking at him helplessly partially in love and partially in exasperation. Remus' long fingers clutched the polyjuice potion tightly as he raised his eyebrows not-so patiently waiting for Sirius' response.

"Remember when I had prongs give me breakfast in bed in exchange for me doing him a favour?

"No but sure."

This time Sirius was the one who raised his eyebrows.

"Well if you even cared to pay attention, the favour that I told him I could do was to finally get him a date with Evans."

"Okay now the question I have is why the ever loving fuck you would say that knowing how badly in love with her he is and badly she despises him. Oh and you."

"Not wormtail?"

"No, I actually saw them high fiving earlier it was really weird."

"Circes tit, really?" he breathed out as Sirius put a hand on his hip.

"Yes really, now carry on you twat."

"Alright so, for obvious reasons I could not get her to agree, and as you know quite well a man can not go back on his word."

"You're not a man."

"I am a young man."

"We're 15."

"Fuck you, anyway I promised the poor lad so I've found a loop hole."

"And what would that be?"

Sirius brought out his hands and shook them in a way to show his oh so marvellous 'jazz hands', "me, of course."

"Oh yeah, 'of course' why didn't I think of that."

"Honestly moony, you're clearly not a very bright child."

"Dashing, aren't you."

"Oh moony, you're making me blush, oh stop it you. Anyway, I promised him a date with Lily not a date with the actual Lily so polyjuice will do the trick just fine."

"You're gonna go on a date with prongs," Remus deadpanned as he stared in disbelief.

"Well, you don't have to be so judgemental, am I that unattractive to you?"

Oh if Sirius knew just how attractive Remus truly thought he was, the late nights spent thinking of his star, of the one person he truly knew who he could love with no boundaries, the one person he could never have, because he loved him too much to bring him more pain. The pain he could barely handle himself, he would never bring that onto another no less the person he cared about more than everyone else, if only Remus loved him less than maybe it would stop the ache.

"Yes actually."

Remus is also a pathological liar.

"Will you give me the potion or not?"

Remus handed it over as he rolled his eyes, "when this ends terribly I'll plan the funeral."

"Who's funeral exactly?"

"I'm not sure yet."

"Oh thats not ominous at all," after a beat of silence, "thanks for stealing the potion moons."

"Oh it's fine, it was some poor slytherins."

Sirius snorted, "oh what a fine prefect you make."

"The best."

Sirius sat down on the cold tiles, took an inhale closed his eyes and gripping the potion bottle tightly he tugged it down in one go like a vodka shot. With his other hand he plugged his nose and immediately almost threw up afterwards.

"What the hell! Merlins balls that was disgusting."

Remus chuckled on the side as Sirius' pure misery, then it stopped as he saw the transformation. All he could hear were moans and groans from the other lads end but on Remus side he saw the literal transformation of his best friend turning into a woman.

"I, oh my god, are you okay?"

"What the fuck! No I'm not okay, holy shit, I sound like--"

"Lily," they both said in unison, at an instant Sirius dashed towards the mirrors and let out a gasp.

Sirius started feeling up his sides, his arms and forearms and had the biggest grin on his face that looked quite odd on Lily's face in Remus' opinion. He kept looking down and up which was a little disturbing to Remus for some reason.

Sirius stepped back and looked at Remus as he let out a laugh in disbelief as he can't believe what he's about to say, "I, I've got a chicks body, bloody hell moony!"

Remus laughed too and just put a hand on his head cracking up right with him not even being able to think of a sly comeback.

"Shit mate, yeah pads oh my god you look and fucking sound like Lily."

"Oh yeah I do," Sirius stared at him with his classic Sirius black grin, although on a different body Remus could recognize that anywhere.

"Okay okay, will you stop objectifying Lily now," Remus tried to say that with an annoyed tone but he couldn't help the smile in his voice and Sirius could get drunk off of that tone of his voice.

"Oh yes sir prefect, yes I will."

Remus with a wide grin went to look at his watch and went wide eyed, "shit look at the time pads."

Sirius not worried about anything rolled his eyes, "oh but I think you mean Lily."

But then he did look at the time, and rushed out knowing he had to meet James in two minutes, he went to the dorms, quickly put on the girls uniform he had since Marlene lent him hers when he protested against the dress code.

He really did adore that skirt, he loved how it looked on his-, oh he had to run now if he's going to make it to James without being late. He loudly shout 'wish me luck' to Remus and ran past a confused looking Peter, who Remus was very excited to tell about this entire disaster of a situation.

*****

James was waiting patiently at the great hall with a rose in his hand, getting his hopes up every time someone would walk in, he didn't put too much effort into his outfit as he wasn't sure if Sirius would actually manage to get a date with the Lily Evans.

Before he could think of anything else, his heart stopped as he saw a out of breath and yet unmistakingly beautiful Lily Evans walk through the door and as she met his eyes, her magnificent green apple orbs meeting his own, he swooned a little as she rushed her way over.

"Oh my god p-James, I'm so sorry if you've been waiting here for long, I got caught up with Remus and it was this whole thing really."

James smiled fondly at her or well at him, at the rambling and just took her hand and sat her down.

"Oh it's fine really, but are you okay?" He looked all over her, his body rubbing her arms and kneeled down beside her.

"Oh god Lily! How hard did you hurt yourself?"

"What? Are you mad-"

James touched Lily, Sirius' forehead and gasped, "oh god, you've had a terrible fall!"

Sirius, ever confused rubbed his sides self consciously, "no, what? I mean I don't think-, what are you on about?"

Then Sirius got it all too late when he saw the sly smile on James' face, "I could've sworn you fell straight out of heaven," and without missing a beat James had his rose in front of Lily/Sirius and with a wink he added, "angel."

"Oh you twat, you calling me Satan?" Sirius was caught off guard by the pure flirting and knew he had to put himself together and with a small smile he cupped James' hand with the rose and with his other he cupped James' cheek, "or did you want to catch me?"

He watched as James simply tripped on pure air and fall in front of him, and Sirius trying to hold back a laugh raised an eyebrow and to this James brought himself up to his feet and replied, "I was not expecting that."

"What? Weren't expecting to get this far?"

"No. not really if I'm being honest."

"Well, that explains the blushing, your entire face is a cute red, and," Sirius decided to lean in a bit closer, "I bet the rest of you is as well."

Sirius had to stop himself from laughing but oh my god, he wanted to frame this moment. He, Sirius Orion Black has made James more flustered than he thought would even be possible.

"Quite the ladies man you are miss Evans, do you talk to all your dates like this or am I just this special."

"Oh Jamie, you don't know how special you are."

"Oh Evans, if I could rearrange the entire alphabet I would put U and I together."

Sirius let out an unattractive snort, "okay champ."

James let his arm out to reach, "shall we?"

"We shall."

Sirius looked over at James because he was taking deeper inhales then a normal person should and when he asked as to why the only response was, "oh you just took my breath away, if I need CPR I'll let you know."

"How about I steal it again Jamie."

Sirius smirked and James eyed him before shaking his head, "thats for later my love."

"Anything else you're saving for later?"

At this James simply winked at him obnoxiously but narrowed his eyes at him slightly which made Sirius all the more nervous.

"You sure are acting different Lily."

Sirius is now positive James knows that it's him.

"Don't worry handsome, I still think you're a twat."

James knows it's Sirius.

"Oh lovely, let's go to the common room so I can serenade you there." James needed to ask someone about what the hell is going on because he knows thats Sirius and not Lily, and he needs Sirius to tell him, but luck is on his side because Sirius doesn't know that he knows.

"Oh yes, lets. I would love nothing more than for you to serenade me with your beautiful singing voice."

As they walked to the common room arm in arm, Sirius was sweating the entirety there because christ James knows and he is positive that he knows.

"Oh um, James? I need to use the restroom really quickly, I'll be right back."

James waved her off saying have fun as he ran to Peter needing someone to talk to about this.

He hit Peters arm repeatedly as he was repeating his name as well, he was as frantic as ever and just about shook his arms as well, "peter what the fuck do I do mate?"

Peter looked at him questioningly, "what do you need to do?"

James blurted out, "I'm on a date with padfoot!"

"Oh, well I support you mate, terrible choice in men but I'm glad you've moved on from Evans!"

This time James hit Peters arm again but much more harder than before, "no! I'm on a date with Lily but it's not Lily, it's pads but he doesn't know that I know."

"Oh. Because he said he'd get you a date with her?"

"YES!"

"Oh and he took some.. oh I see now. Well shit mate, you're in quite a pickle now."

"Yeah no shit wormtail."

"Well, work with that; he doesn't know that you know so flirt with him make him uncomfortable and then he'll have to confess."

"Easier said than done mate, but.. thats not a bad idea."

"He has no idea so it couldn't possibly go wrong."

"Oh yeah on a date with my best friend pretending to be the love of my life and I have to be romantic with him in order for him to tell me he's not the love of my life, what could ever possibly go wrong!"

Peter stood up, "just here-- let me do this," he unopened the first few buttons to James' shirt and ruffled up his more so then usual, "that should help."

James looked down and simply shrugged and went back to the common room where Lily-- no Sirius, looked frazzled but with intent on his face.

Although, when Sirius ran to the restroom previously James has no idea he grabbed Remus hand and dragged him there with his face looking pale and wide eyed.

"Okay what now," Remus asked with an exasperated sigh.

"I was not prepared for these terrible conditions I've put myself in."

Remus smiled widely, quite mockingly Sirius would like to add, and clasped his hands together, "oh goody. Now what made you have this absolutely absurd observation that I totally did not see forthcoming?"

"I didn't know he was going to flirt with me!"

"On a date? With the girl of his dreams? Oh how dare he flirt, oh gosh. Wow."

"Shut up okay? I need you to shut the fuck up."

"Wait so, what did you do?"

"Flirted back obviously! It's my instinct from when we compliment each others asses, how could I not? But it's more sincere, and just straight up fucking weird."

"Oh, I see the problem, prongs knows."

"Do you know how hard it is for me not to call him prongs! I haven't called him his actual name this many times since the day we first met-- and that was simply out of spite to annoy him."

"Oh what a lovely child you were."

"I'm lovely now too."

"Oh, of course you are Lily."

"I don't want to confess to him that I couldn't get Lily though, I can't give up moonshine."

"But he knows."

"Yeah but, I don't want to lose."

Remus wanted to facepalm, of fucking course Sirius turned this into something it's not, making sure he doesn't face the true error of his ways and instead turning this into something he can fuck around with.

Nothing to unpack there. Nope, not at all.

"Okay fine, so what? You're just going to go on with the date? Pretend nothing is going on and you'll just flirt back?"

"Well yeah, I just need to get through this date before he calls it off and then I'll keep my end of the deal."

"You really are in a fucking mess."

"As per usual."

"Well, you have luck on your side I guess, because he knows that you're not Lily and you know that he knows. However, he doesn't know that you know that he knows."

Sirius turned his head to the side in confusion and Remus wanted to kiss him so badly so he flicked him on the forehead instead.

"He doesn't know what you know, you have the upper hand you imbecile."

"So what?"

"You two are best mates, he doesn't want to romantically be with you, so do what you do best and make people uncomfortable."

"I can do that."

"I know you can."

"Oh, I know you do," at this Sirius winked at Remus.

"Perfect example mutt."

With Sirius flipping him off, he untied his hair and let it roam around as he walked back or more so strutted back knowing his mission at hand.

Which lead him to this moment of Sirius slightly frazzled not knowing how to accomplish his mission at hand but at least having a mission at hand. James then slipped himself right beside Sirius and putting an arm around his shoulder, "you look magnificent Evans."

"You're not too bad yourself."

"No but, you're almost too good to be true, almost as if someones playing a trick on me and it's not really you."

Sirius stared back, his face going white and his eyes going wide and he had no idea how to reply. He knew James knew but he didn't know he was going to make comments like that, it caught him off guard he ran a hand through his hair.

"Well you know I'm completely real and I can assure you if someone was playing a trick on you it would only be from the pure goodness from their heart."

James narrowed his eyes and gulped, "well if it was from the goodness of their heart, they should know it's not a very well thought out trick, sweetheart."

"I think it would be very well thought out, having tricked you to believe it really is Li- me, deer." James knew from the little sneer on Sirius' or well Lily's pale face that he was not calling him a term of endearment but calling him his animagus which James did do a double take and looking back at Sirius he knew the reaction was exactly what he wanted.

James grabbed his shoulder and stood up with mischief in his eyes which for once Sirius slightly feared, "hey someone's playing some music in the corner, let's dance Evans."

Sirius stared back but kept his composure normal, "dance?"

"Well we are on a date after all."

James let out his hand and Sirius took it gracefully, not ready to slow dance with James at all, "oh such a gentlemen."

"My pleasure milady."

Sirius inhaled and let James bring him to a corner of the common room that was unoccupied and allowed himself to put his arms around James shoulders. He was silently cursing out Lily in his head for being so fucking short. All the while James was sweating because he didn't know how to fucking dance and he knew Sirius knew.

"Need a hand, deer?"

"No."

Sirius grinned and looked at the taller lad, "put your hand on my sides you nitwit and just sway."

James closed his eyes and let out a small smile as he let his hands a little lower than what was probably appropriate for two laddy lads doing lad things.

"James Fleamont Potter, I swear to fucking god you put your hands higher or I'll winguardiam leviosa your ass so hard you'll end up on the fucking moon."

"I mean I do love you to the moon and back."

"So are those your last words then?"

James only smiled wider when he put his hands on his sides much higher than it was before.

"You sure know how to dance."

"Well I've had classes and it sure does come in handy when I get to teach pretty boys like yourself Mr. Potter."

"You think I'm pretty?" James smirked a bit.

"The prettiest."

James took his hand off of Sirius' side to flick his hand as he gasped dramatically, "oh, you flatter me."

"Oh when I'm done with you, you'll be better than flattered," Sirius let out a flirty smile hoping to the lords above that James would give up right now and tell him he knows.

"So naughty."

Sirius took an inhale as he gulped knowing where their dancing would lead to on a normal date.

James thought the same thing and almost at the same time they both had an idea where they knew the other would confess, not knowing they both had the same idea.

James gulped as he spoke, "you know this is where, we would usually get to the uh, kissing part."

Sirius froze up hoping he could have brought it up first, "oh I would love to Jamie."

Sirius would not love to kiss him, considering this would be his first kiss.

"Then we should, yes."

James desperately knew they should not. No.

James knew Sirius would give in, because he knew Sirius knew. And Sirius doesn't know he knows that he knows that he knows.

Right?

James could go through with this until Sirius gives up, he could do this, can't he?

Sirius on the other hand knew James would never go through with this, he had this in the bag, he knew James is doing this just to have Sirius give in. He knew James and he knew he would not go through kissing him, he won't chicken out and if it takes him to almost kiss his best mate he would do it.

Sirius black will never lose.

Sirius gulped, "okay let's kiss then?"

James shifted uncomfortably on his feet and licked his lips having his eyed intent on Sirius, begging him to confess first.

"I'm ready mon amour."

Sirius responded dryly, "planning on french kissing me with that terrible accent?"

"You speak french Lily?" James quipped back and seeing that alarmed look on Sirius' face and although those facial features were Lily's the panic was pure Sirius and he inhaled it.

"Er, no but, I'm not an idiot."

James thought that was the most in character thing Sirius has said this entire afternoon.

"Alright, we-- yeah let's do this dream girl."

Sirius closed his eyes and puckered his lip slowly moving forward, to give James time to fucking confess, and to be fair Sirius was getting quite impatient.

James was not giving in, he also leaned forward as slowly as possible closing his eyes tight, hoping and praying for Sirius to give in.

They were leaning forward, lips almost moving off of their faces as Sirius grabbed James shoulders peeking an eye open and saw James doing nothing that looked like confessing.

They wouldn't kiss, they couldn't, Sirius knew James would give in.

Except he didn't.

Sirius' first kiss was James Potter.

James' first kiss was Sirius Black.

Their lips touched and were firmly pressed on each other not one moving to further the kiss, it lasted an entirety of two whole seconds before there was a loud, "fine, you win!"

"I'm not Lily you twat, you mother fucker, you absolute bastard."

James was still puckering his lips when he opened his eyes and finally fucking smiled.

Instead of a response he clapped, "congratulations Sirius Orion Black, you were my first kiss."

"You stole mine you twat!"

"What?! You were the one who leaned in first!"

"You were the one who said we should, when you knew! I thought you'd give in!"

"Well thank you for confessing your sin pads."

Then they heard clapping and both Sirius and James turned around to find Peter and Remus clapping and James raised his eyebrows, "great show you both, truly. Glad you both finally had your first kiss."

Sirius at this bowed to both at them, "and yet no girlfriend."

James plopped himself next to Remus and laid his head down in his lap after the truly traumatic experience that was his first date. Although Remus paid no attention to him and kept his eyes on Sirius.

"Just a girlfriend?"

Sirius exhaled with a shaky breath, "or a boyfriend."

"Good to know," Remus smirked.

Oh Sirius was really doomed.