#its july its time to stop
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fellas is it gay to fall off a spot so you can be close to your soulmate in the fandometrics??
#its july its time to stop#dan and phil#daniel howell#danisnotonfire#phil lester#amazingphil#phan#fandometrics#fandom#gay
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totally haven't been hyperfixed on this game for the past two weeks ahaha
+ some sif portrait redraws under the cut
#isat siffrin#isat#orangetriestoart#i played the game for a whole weekend in the beginning of july and i havent stopped thinking about it since god its so gOOD#currently in the process of trying to get all of the achievements and taking emotional damage every time i get a new memory#i wanna make a full piece thing for it but i gotta learn how to use grayscale better ive been studying from the game screenshots#cause like all the art in the game is so cool and expressive and really really good at using limited values like mad respect#but for now slight color until i can figure out how to break up values better yipepeeeeeeee#anywasy gnightttt tumbly have a good one if ur reading this :D
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POV: Mark Webber is your house husband
#i wish you guys could have heard my squealing laughter from when i first saw the sandwich picture#actually losing my shit laughing#WHAT ARE THESE#WHY IS THERE A DOMESTIC MARK WEBBER PHOTOSHOOT#i understood the other pics from this same shoot of him biking and with his car but these are so insanely domestic its hilarious 😭#but like the awkward smile in the sandwich picture i cant stop laughing#ive joked abt how i dont understand 2000s f1 photoshoots but this is honestly peak in that aspect bcs seriously wth 😭#was this his audition for an f1 seat? like 'heres what ill do for you if you hire me 😘(@ flavio)'#(but fr i checked these were taken like right around the exact time he almost got to test his first f1 car so the timing is v funny to me)#all from july 2000 btw#mark webber#f1#formula 1#formula one
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so for like, a decade plus, i've been searching for a youtube video i remember seeing back in 2007, and i've finally managed to make some headway:
good news: i've found it
bad news: it's lost media
#it's been bugging me for so long honestly#ive talked about it in my tags before but its basically the video that introduced me to roblox#it's probably a bit silly to have been searching for this video. but part of the reason ive been looking is to see how good my memory is#specifically memories from when i was 9 years old. and how those memories have aged given im 26 now#like id say my memory is pretty good. specifically remembering specific details from memories long ago#like that isn't to say they're perfect. like i'll get some details wrong. but i know the general idea of what i saw#but basically#it's basically some old roblox bloopers video that had their character in a baseball cap and lugia t-shirt#now for a few years i wasn't sure i was correct on this person wearing a lugia t-shirt#and so at some point i figured i had to give up looking for that specific detail#since literally no video i could find had these two details combined. id find characters with baseball caps but never with a lugia t-shirt#and by that point i was afraid i wouldn't be able to find this video. or worse. my memory was wrong and it was something i watched in 2008#but i knew it had to be uploaded before december 12th. 2007. because thats when i made my account#and the way i found it was going through 11 pages of a youtube search for ''lego videos''#i was specifically looking for new lego videos to watch. or find something that seemed more interesting than lego mario stop motion#and there was one video that stood out. which was some random roblox bloopers video. mixed in with a bunch of random lego videos#anyway. just today i was scrolling through twitters ''for you'' tab and happened upon a thread showing off lost roblox youtube thumbnails#and i was like ''well. can't hurt to see if theres anything in here that i recognize.''#and lo and behold. a roblox dude in a blue baseball cap and a lugia t-shirt. labeled as ''ROBLOX Bloopers!''#i could feel the anvil of my doubt free itself from my brain because i finally had proof of a video that lines up with my memory#thats not to say this is the exact video but 99% certain it's uploaded by the same person. like it could be roblox bloopers part 2#but anyway. the channel and the video(s) are lost and while im sad i can't watch it to confirm my memory#im happy to see that there's evidence that lines up with my memory of what i saw back then#for reference. it was uploaded by someone named 'Furzniak' at the time. and it was uploaded on July 21st. 2007
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Ngl I'm getting really bored of seeing every character people dislike reduced to "flop" in every single edit ever. Also if I have to see one more fucking edit to Ayesha Erotica or some other girlboss cunt song, I'm gonna fucking lose it YOU'RE NOT THINKING CREA-TIV-LY
#how did i squeeze a DHMIS reference in here?? in 2024???#but seriously its so boring to see “biggie Julie” and “Flop Johnny” every fucking edit and then “I'm the doll 😌” STOP#you guys know you can use literally any music for your edits??? like#it doesnt have to be girlboss slay music#you could use ANYTHING#I'd take the Thomas the Tank Engine theme song over an edit of Thomas Hewitt at this point rather than see “final girl X ENDED flop Y”#same five fucking songs every time I'M SICK OF IT#also the fatphobia in the TCM fandom specifically on TikTok? y'all make me sick.#tcm game#tcsm game
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You’re welcome to explain your answer in the tags!
#julie and the phantoms#jatp#jatppolls#dont ask me why the number categories are like this!!! there is no rhyme or reason to them!!!#been thinking bout this for awhile now. cause it didnt occur to me that I havent watched it since i netflix party’d it with Rosie in Sept#2021… which has been… a very long time. considering in 2020 after it came out i probably watched it over 100 times in full.#there’s just something that stops me from clicking play on the show and i cant put it into words. its just this feeling i get every time my#mouse or finger hovers over the show. i also got rid of netflix this past year too but that was quite recent and i do have a copy of it on#my ipad sksjsj idk#guess im just curious if anyon else is in this weird limbo. dont get me wrong. i am still enamoured by this show but rewatching it is just#smthg i havent done in a hot minute. maybe i should make Rosie do another netflix party with me 👀#i feel like if i was more active in a discord or on tumblr i wouldve tried to watch it with mutuals but alas i am incapable of having free#time outside of work and life.#once again i am shocked that the answers are centred in the bubbles before u click on them and it bothers me?!?#alt option: i have rewatched the show aolely through gifsets 😌#sunset queue#<- queuing this for some reason. idk what the reason is.
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...
#ugh. im so tried. why is crying so exhausting? i havent done anything. this is bullshit#we went from a slow motion breakdown to full on freakout meltdown today#luckily no one was around in the lab this morning bc i couldnt stop crying#so i went to the counseling center and made myself their problem#canceled my committee meeting. which everyone tells me is fine. its all fine#think about going home for a while they say. maybe tell ur dad ur having a bad time thry say#but im so tired. and i dont kno what to do and its all falling apart#i just feel like im brushing up against the limits of what i can do intellectually and its like well where do i go from here?#what do i do with my old data? how do i move my project forward? whats the point of any of this?#why did i put myself in this position? would taking a leave even help? id still have to come back to the same mess#its just so frustrating bc theres no solution ill find satisfying. everything just sucks.#idk what my advisor even told my committee. bc we were supposed to meet tomorrow morning. ugh. it would have been so bad#it also sucks bc im so drained that i can just feel my own weight when im trying to talk to ppl#like u kno when ur being a wet blanket but u dont kno how to fix it. like srry my vibes r wretched. maybe im just stuck like this#i dunno. my dad invited us home for a week in july and also plans to come out to visit me in August. but that seems like a long time away#i dunno what im gonna do. what a disaster#unrelated
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I was just listening to a song I used to love while we were friends. I listened to it so often, we talked so often, it became the background music to our relationship.
I'm listening to it while I knit. I often forget that I started knitting because of you. I remembered tonight. It's strange, I never knitted anything for you. I've knitted for other loved ones, rarely for myself, but never for you. I remembered you showing me the amazing things you made, and I wished I could get to that level of skill. But at that time, you had to explain to me how to purl because I couldn't get it.
Everything reminds me of you in a terrible way. Everything I do is an echo of you. I started painting so that I could paint for you. I started knitting to bond with you. I hear your voice in the music I listen to. You're haunting the things that I love. Will I ever make a brush stroke or stitch without you on my mind?
#i should be able to block all music i listened to on Spotify from 2018-2020. i was not doing well and i dont need the reminders pls#im fine this was just kinda reflective#so much of what i do was inspired by her. i havent spoken to her in three years. we havent been friends for five#but my first painting was a gift to her. i started knitting because she knitted. i got so much music from her#we bonded heavily over music. and i used it to cope after she left. so unfortunately shes mixed into so much of it#she got me into dnd which got me into a different ttrpg im playing now (unknown armies)#shes a big reason i applied to the summer camp i worked at for six years#and a big reason i took the position i had the last two years. and the reason i told our camp legend (long story)#she was in my christmas in july gift i gave and received this year#i dont think ill ever be able to forget her. on good nights thats a good thing. its reassuring. she'll always be with me#but on bad nights. i feel like im never going to stop missing her#i was knitting tonight while listening to music. as the post suggests. and i was just overcome with her#this is the bed i was in when she called and left me. this is the bedroom we used to video call to practice sign language in#oh theres another one. i was going to be an asl interpreter. years ago in another life. i always practiced with her#we're both autistic and asl is easier than speaking a lot of the time#fuck. it reminds me of the ship of theseus. its 2:30am so i wont be able to explain well but#no actually i tried and i cannot explain. youll just have to understand. some days i wish i ciuld replace all the parts that were her#and sometimes im so afraid to lose the parts that were her because thatll feel like losing her#if i ever consciously decided to stop knitting (which i may have to do soon) it will feel like im replacing a board that was hers#how many of my boards are hers? are any of hers mine anymore? how many of hers can i lose before shes gone?#that last one was asked with fear and hope. and fear. depending on the day#god im tired. goodnight
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aaa shes so pretty <33 I keep getting reccomended really cute dresses on pinterest so i got inspired and voila xD
thank you hands for letting me actually make something today
(。T ω T。)
(((a bonus alternate version- i couldnt decide if i preferred the background coloured or not so here you go. have another one ig xD)))
#antsmakin art things#i keep using different tags for art#its that one#ill remember it eventually#anywhoo#time to tag this silly little post of mine#id like to mention that its raining outside#very nice#i hope all the little plants enjoy their drink#i was supposed to tag this oops#welcome home#julie joyful#there you go#and there *i* go back to my cave#later!#thanks for stopping by! :D
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of all the times for the "art feels like pulling teeth" feeling to rear its head again T_T
#its just burnout i think. i havent had a Deadline in . years?#unfortunately the only way ill be able to get some of this stuff done on time is . completely starting over#well not COMPLETELY. i can copypaste some elements i think. but ill need to redraw some poses and figures entirely#it just sucks that i had all these ambitions at the beginning of july and then i got pneumonia#and had to scale back to a bare minimum id be happy with and then had to scale back AGAIN from THAT#i guess nothings stopping me from drawing the pic ideas i had anyway. but#whag ever#art fun#this too shall pass
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I think I might have a conversation about getting engaged or at least having the thought of setting aside money for a wedding.
I don't want to rush my love and he can propose when he's ready, but I want to see if he'd be interested sooner than later so I can get some plans in place.
It'll be two years until I finish up with my master, but I am going to be busy and I'm not sure if I can plan a wedding while stressing about school.
I also can wait and see how grad school treats me.
I'd also like the clarity of plans for the future and something to work towards.
It would also be so much easier to explain that we're engaged instead of being in engagement limbo of "we're engaged, just not officially".
I might at least mention something to him when we have a three hour car ride to his extended family this weekend.
Any thoughts, friends?
#the earliest we could get married is December 2025 but its feel silly because i finish school May 2026#so realistically we are looking May 2026-July 2026#i also just want to marry the man and stop being apart all the time#and id like to start slowly getting things ready for that.#i also should trust him to propose when hes ready#i might just mention 'i know we are not engaged yet but i want to start setting funds aside for when we do get married#so that i don't have to struggle as much#i also need to put funds aside for a down payment of a car#but i also want to start saving for a wedding and trust me im going to be broke#thats why i want to go forward in that#also id love the clarity itd bring of 'yes we're engaged and planning on getting married may/june/july 2026#evening thoughts
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.
#had the worst day ever#last week things got a little better but today just destroyed all the progress i made#its so FRUSTRATING#how emotionally unstable i am 🫠#like idek if im just overly sensitive or ive really just been let down over and over again#and like bc of this i KNOW i shouldn’t expect ANYTHING at all not even human decency from others#but i still have hope unfortunately so i get crushed every time something goes wrong (all the time everyday)#today i woke up early to go run some errands and got home late at night#and the whole day i only had one piece of bread and iced tea#and like. i KNOW this is exactly why i feel awful and terrible and everything is shit#which is why its even more frustrating bc i can’t do anything about it when im this depressed rn…#and like . its really annoying that everything is just going so wrong that i give up on it all bc i just can’t deal with anything#i don’t even have my best friend anymore to complain to#i really really reallly can’t do this alone but ig this is how it’ll be for a long time#it’s been like this since early july… honestly i don’t even think things will get any better soon#seeing how even tho i made some progress last week i lost it all now and i will keep losing it over and over again#im going crazy really#and i wish my parents would stop making me feel guilty that im depressed#like genuinely what do you want me to do about it?????#you get annoyed at me when i don’t eat the food you make when u know im insane and paranoid and cannot eat this ive told u a million times#and the worst thing is that they KNOW what i like and eat but they don’t make it ever they keep making the food i can’t eat#like u can’t expect me to go inside the kitchen and make it myself bc i will literally pass out and die#im not kidding when i say this bc so many times i try and i really faint bc of the distress it makes me feel#i feel like this might sound extremely stupid to anyone who hasn’t experienced it but that’s just how it is here#anyway im gonna go to sleep now even tho im probably gonna die of frustration#i don’t think i’ll even wake tomorrow x_x my head feels like it might explode any second now#we have a family gathering tomorrow but im ditching them so ill probably just sleep until tuesday 😀 great#(i say this bc its 7am rn… by tomorrow i mean today but it’s tomorrow in my head bc im still up)
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the warm fuzzy feeling when you’re obsessed with your own fic
#ive never felt this way before about my own works#im usually super hyper critical#but with these ones#fuck it#they’re not perfect but i LOVE them#esp the one im doing now#i cant stop thinking about it#also i cant stop thinking about the rebound au ill be writing about in july#blackstar already has some sketches made and I just *pacha face*#sulley speaks#its been a really long time since ive gotten to actively talk about fo.ur sw.ords and im just so excited to share something i keep so dear
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god i just need to read daisy jones and the six
#have been absolutely obsessing over this show for too long now omg#shawna speaks and no one listens#watched first episode on tuesday#and watched the rest on wednesday#and havent stopped thinking about it since#its consuming my entire life#every person ive spoken too since beginning the show#i just tell them about the show#and now ive just been watching random videos and shorts about it on youtube#and rewatching the episodes#now im thiinking#since julie was the one filming#i wonder how skewed of a view everyone gave of camilia#cause one shes passed by the time theyre filming and two theyre talking about the memory of her to her own daughter#like ..... just makees you thinkkkkk#am i crazy?#is anyone esle thinking these things#am i too obsessed with this show???
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guys you need to stop making amazing art and fics and edits 👀... my queue is so backed up oh noo 👀.... im serious 👀... stawp... 👀🤭
#its backed up until july 5th posting 12 times a day.....guys stop im srs 🤭 (keep them coming)#though i am actually considering speeding up the queue .. idk i'll probably keep it at 12x a day
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OHMYFUCKING GOD WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL
i just ran out of tags . THE DETAILS IN HERE ARE SO SO SO DIVINE AND IM. like this is ur suna. i love ur suna
ALSO UR DIALOGUE IS ALWAYS SUCH A TREAT. U GET IT SO WELL. ITS SO HUMAN AND SO NATURAL. ABD THE TEXTS SPRINKLED IN TO ADD HUMOR AND THAT YOUTHFULNESS IS SO SO SO GOOD
to be loved is to be known | suna rintarou x reader
you're in love with suna. you think suna's in love with someone else. he's not.
slight angst, happy endings, and miscommunications atsumu is sexy reader is gn wc: 1481
It is dusk and warm and just barely humid when you realize you don’t know Suna Rintarou at all.
You know that Suna likes chuupets and volleyball and his dingy digital camera with the cracked screen. His left eye twitches slightly when he lies, he always ties his right shoe before his left, and he keeps forgetting to buy pencil lead despite preferring mechanical pencils over traditional. He likes the rain. Can’t bite into ice cream. Wool scarves over fleece, seven followers on his private Twitter, and is always late because he likes feeding the stray cats in the alley next to the Family Mart with the good sausages.
What you didn’t know is that Suna Rintarou is in love. You find out from Kita Shinsuke, who tells Aran after practice, a conversation not meant for your ears but gracing them nonetheless as you stand before the entrance to the gymnasium. You feel a dryness in your throat and a sting in your eyes as Kita shares that Suna is not only in love but had confessed to someone. Maybe it’s your divine punishment for eavesdropping. Maybe it’s rotten luck. Because, coincidentally, and horribly so, you’ve been in love with Suna Rintarou ever since you met him.
So when Suna walks up from behind you, back from the vending machine, and asks you why you’re lingering outside and staring at Kita with that look on your face, you lie.
“I have a crush on Shinsuke.” You blurt out.
He blinks. Once. Twice. And stares.
The longer Suna stares at you under the grey, purplish-pinkish sky with his hands shoved into his pockets and his left eye twitching, you realize you don’t know him at all. Because Suna, in all his indifference and nonchalance, looks hurt. You see something flit beneath his eyes, but you’ve never been good at reading people. So you settle on the idea that it’s something less than betrayal but more than indifference, and you don’t know why your heart’s beating so fast and sinking, pitter pattering and twisting in your stomach.
You feel sick.
“You like Kita-san,” He says, and it comes out as a statement, not a question. He blinks a third time, and as the look in his eyes disappears as quickly as it came, you decide you much prefer the hurt or the discomfort or the something over the blank apathy that he’s looking you over with now. “You have a crush on Kita… Shinsuke.” He finishes, and you can’t hear the bitterness in his voice over the shrill of your heart.
You’ve always liked Suna’s eyes but tonight you like the pavement more, and as you stare a hole into the concrete beneath you, you ignore how your feet are fidgeting and your palms are sweaty and how Rintarou is hovering over you.
“Mhm,” You squeak, tearing your eyes from the asphalt with the cracks and an ugly pill-bug on the ground. As you look up to grey eyes and dark hair, you wish that loving Suna Rintarou was harder.
“I’m, uh, I’m going to tell Shinsuke tomorrow.” You say, Shinsuke’s name foreign on your tongue compared to the warmth and honey that Rintarou’s tastes like. I’m in love with you and this is a bad idea, you think. I like you, not Kita, is what you don’t say. Instead, and arguably worse, is the mention of Miya Atsumu’s name. “Atsumu gave me the confidence to confess!”
Suna pauses.
“Atsumu told you to?” He asks, and it’s the most bewildered you’ve heard him in a while.
A glance at his phone. Hands that emerge from his pockets. If you weren’t so preoccupied with the concrete you would have seen the twitch of his fingers and the tightening of his jaw as he opens Line. You nod dimly.
“Okay,” is what he says, and you feel your heart in your stomach again. You look up. “Okay.” He repeats again.
And maybe it’s the hurt that stings in your chest from Rintarou being so okay with you (hypothetically) being in love with Kita Shinsuke that pushes your eyes to water and your mouth to open.
“Is that it?” You ask.
A beat of silence. And then, a scoff.
“Yeah. Congratulations,” Suna says. “Good luck.”
As dusk turns to nightfall and what was a barely-humid night in July is now overwhelmingly warm and sickly and hot, Rintarou’s gaze is overbearing. And when your eyes start to swim and Suna’s gaze turns to confusion and then realization, you do the only thing you know how to do. You bolt.
An incessant string of dings. Your lip wobbles under your teeth as you pull out your phone from under your covers.
from: miya osamu (21:03) where the fuck did ya go and whys suna blwoin up my phone
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (21:03) WHYYSS SUNARIN BLOWING UOA PP MY PHONE ??!?@@>>!?>??!??! WHYS HE SAYIN U LIKE KITA-SAN
from: you (21:05) its so over i ran home
from: you (21:05) i told him i like shinsuke and that i am confessing to kita tomorrow
amazing perfect miya atsexy and miya osamu are typing…
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (21:06) WHAT
from: miya osamu (21:06) r u fuckin stupid why would ya do that
from: you (21:07) i heard shinsuke tell aran that suna confessed to someone today and then rin came back so i told him i like kita bcuz i panicked and also he cant know i like him right as he’s ginna get BAGGED wait but idk if he got rejected or not WHO AM I KIDDING suna would NOT get rejected LOLOL but anyways i think he knows i like him bcuz i started cryig and then he had this look on his face like he knew i was bullshittin him now venmo me money before i kil msyelf
from: miya osamu (21:12) yeah he was gonna confess to YOU today
from: you (21:12) ?
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (21:12) HOLY MISCOMMUNICATION
from: you (21:18) Wht??
from: miya osamu (21:19) suna was supposed to confess to u today
from: you (21:21) but shinsuke said rin already confessed
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (21:22) why wiud u ever think about takin gossip from KITA SHINSUKE AN WHYD YA BRING ME UP IM GNNA BE STONED AT DAWN
from: miya osamu (21:22) HOORAY !
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (21:22) SHUDDUP
You bolt, again, but this time it’s out of your bed, down a flight of stairs, and through your front door. You’re halfway down the street near the Family Mart with the Good Sausages™ when you barrell into someone who smells faintly of blackberries and Suna’s laundry detergent.
“Excuse me,” You blurt, scrambling away, until you feel a grip on your waist and a familiar shape behind you with a familiar smell and a familiar voice, and Ohmygod, you’re out of breath and close to frantic but Suna Rintarou is holding you steady by your waist, warm and tall and here.
“Rintar-”
“I like you.”
You feel it more than you hear it- Suna is muffled and quiet as he mumbles into the back of your shoulder, tall frame folded into you.
“Idiot.” He adds, and you don’t have to turn to know the tips of his ears are pink and his eyebrows are furrowed. “You’re an idiot.”
It’s twilight, and just-barely humid when you realize that Suna Rintarou knows you.
Suna knows that you ramble when you’re nervous. He knows that you like the rain and you don’t like humidity. You carry extra lead in your pencil pouch and you like volleyball and stray cats. You can bite into your ice cream. You color coordinate your bookshelves. You don’t have a crush on Kita Shinsuke.
You don’t know that Suna keeps his digital camera with the shitty cracks because you bought it for him from a shop in Akihabara. You don’t know that Suna leaves his packs of pencil lead at home because leaning over your desk in class and seeing that smile on your face is far more fun. You don’t know that he writes with extra pressure on his worksheets to crack his lead and ask for more.
You didn’t know that Suna Rintarou is in love with you.
So he grins into your shoulder and tells you.
amazing perfect miya atsexy (22:14) 1 Attachment GROSS!!!!!! do NOT start making out at practice or i will RESIGN !!!
sunarin (22:14) @ y/n lets start making out at practice
y/n, miya osamu, and 2 others reacted with Thumbs Up! ojiro aran, amazing perfect miya atsexy reacted with Thumbs Down!
from: amazing perfect miya atsexy (22:15) @ KITA SHINSUKE @ KITA SHINSUKE @ KITA SHINSUKE @ KITA SHINSUKE
sunarin has removed amazing perfect miya atsexy from the Inarizaki Volleyball Team Chat.
#stop because im actually staring at my phone in shock#ur writing style CHANGED SO MUCH ??? ITS DIVINE WHAT THE HELL IM SCREAMING#no bc ur writing is angelic#like the details#the little pillbug u see on the ground#the way his eye twitches#the crack on the asphalt and the crack on the digicam from akihabara#it’s all so human and real and the way u write with the details just pulls at ur heart like WHAT ???? WHAT ???!!!!#i think this is like my favorite fic ever and i don’t even LIKE SUNA#bro i wanna kiss Atsumu#THIS IS SO HAIKYUU AND SO JAPAN AND ITS SO HUMID SUMMER JULY#like just#setting it in july with the nostalgia permeating through the piece is so gorgeous and all the memories that u notice when u love someone is#SO SO SO SO GORGEOYS#im actually in shock like this is so good???? SO SO GOOD ????#the pencil lead and the repetition and the realization#it flows SOWELL#the way u characterize nonchalance and the emotion peeking through masks is so suna and so human and im just wow#this was actually such a treat to read like HELLO ??????#goddamn !!!#U DONT KNOW HE WRITES WITH EXTRA PRESSURE TO ASI FOR MORE LED#IM SOBBJG#this is such sweet love and so . SUMMER LOVE AND SUNMER NOSTALGIA#like do u know heat waves that’s what this piece feels like heatwaves mixed with summer time sadness remix#so so so crazy good#im being 100%honest u are so talented and the amount of love u out into this is so clear like i can feel it#i adore this#SUNA SMELLS LIKE BLACJVERRIES AND LAUNDRY#HOW DO U THINK OF THAT#LIKE WHAT ????
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