#its in expert mode too

[snowberai]

Me and my friends are starting a terraria calamity mod world.

We are all going to cry.

[rusty-gloinks]

oops

[gibbearish]

speaking of terraria ive spent the last few days grinding my way through it for the first time in i think like over two years and i forgot. so much but also im doing SO much better than before

[aria0fgold]

I FINALLY HAVE MY PHONE BACK AAYYYYYYYEEEEEE!!!!!!! FREEDOM!!!! its lcd is so much better than the prev one am so happy!!!! gonna be babying my phone this time just to keep its lcd from breaking again

[4giorno]

omggg valkyrie just never misses

[the-cooler-king]

They don't even call it proud mode in kh1 they just call it expert mode. I was like maybe I can? Then I remembered the last time I tried expert mode in this game it kicked the shit out of me. I tried grinding shadows on the destiny islands to give me an edge but it did nothing. By the time I got to the first boss in traverse town I Could Not defeat him no matter how hard I tried. Thinking of like Ursula or Clayton or Ansem/Riku I said no I don't need to do this to myself.

[lurkingshan]

Japanese BL Starter Pack

It’s been awhile since I dropped a rec list, so I am here today to share one that is very near and dear to my heart—a Japanese bl primer for those who are new to the jbl game. I created this for @neuroticbookworm to help her on her journey when she decided she wanted to start getting into Japanese works. The fandom (on Tumblr and generally) tends to focus primarily on Thai shows because they are the easiest to access for international fans, since Thailand is working its way toward world domination via ql media and wants us all to be able to watch. But there is a lot of great stuff to watch beyond the easy access Thai channels, and Japan is the country where this genre originated, so its shows are important for anyone who considers themselves a bl fan. Japan doesn’t cater nearly as much to the international audience so tracking down the shows sometimes takes some ingenuity and can-do spirit, but that’s part of the fun!

And so, the list! Bookworm is about halfway through it and having a ball, so I figured it was time to stop hoarding it and share it with anyone else who would like to dip their toes into jbl and isn’t quite sure where to start. A few notes: 

I am not here to teach you about the deep roots of the jbl genre or give you a primer on yaoi manga. I am by no means an expert and there are other places to find that information. Start here with this great post by @nieves-de-sugui and then maybe wander over to @absolutebl to read up more on the evolution of the genre.

This list is by no means an exhaustive accounting of every important Japanese bl ever made; it is simply a nice sampler platter of the cream of the crop among various styles you will find in jbl. Watching through this whole list will not only expose you to some fantastic shows, but also give you a sense of what makes jbl unique and how the country’s style differs from others, and point you toward the types of jbl you’ll like most (they tend to put shows in pretty specific style and tone lanes and once you find the ones you like there are lots more where that came from). 

If you’re coming to this post as a jbl lover and you don’t see your favorite here, I promise it’s not because I don’t love it very much; I simply had to make some choices to get this down to a reasonable shortlist. Feel free to leave extra recs for others to find! 

I’m putting these in a loose suggested watch order that will take you through the various jbl lanes in a kind of popcorn style, because I always think it’s good to change it up so you don’t get too stuck in one mode, and it works its way up to most of the extremely Japanese stuff (you will know what that means by the time you finish). But do what’s in your heart and change up the order if you want, friends, I am not the boss of you! 

Cherry Magic (Crunchyroll or grey)

gif by @liyazaki

I believe everyone on Tumblr is pretty familiar with this one, which is not a coincidence—this is one of the most accessible jbls. Not in terms of actual access to watch it, mind you (we’ve all jumped through shady internet hoops to watch it) but in terms of its content and style. Cherry Magic is a classic workplace romcom with a magical twist, and it is charming af. It’s a great exemplar of Japan’s light and zippy comedy lane for bl—a lane in which, importantly, the romances stay chaste even when the actual plot is about sex, or lack thereof. My friend @waitmyturtles would kill me if I didn’t make sure you know that Cherry Magic also has a lovely follow up film. And bonus: there is now a Thai remake airing so if you watch the original you can get in on the discussion about the different adaptations between countries. This is pretty easy to find these days in all the usual places, but I strongly recommend watching it here.

Old Fashion Cupcake (Viki)

gif by @liyazaki

Moving on to a slightly more mature workplace romcom. Old Fashion Cupcake, another Tumblr favorite, is an age gap boss-subordinate romance, and it’s both very adult and somehow wholesome af at the same time. Sure, there is a lot of carnal desire going on here, but there is also a lot of wooing via fluffy pancakes. It’s a tight five episodes and a fantastic example of what Japan, with its extreme technical precision in writing, directing, editing, pacing, and acting firing on all cylinders, can do in two hours. There’s not an ounce of flab on this thing and you’ll want to watch it over and over again.

Utsukushii Kare (Viki)

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Time to get a little weird! Weird is a key feature of Japanese media, and lots of jbls explore unusual relationship dynamics rooted in complex psychology. This is the first show on the list that will likely feel very Japanese if you’re new around here—my advice is to lean into it and finish the show, even if you get uncomfortable along the way. In Japanese media, discomfort always serves a purpose. This is a high school story with a twisted relationship at its center, and I’m not saying any more than that. Don’t spoil yourself and go watch it! This one also comes with two sequels—one short second season and one movie—that continue from the original story. They are less essential but still excellent.

I Cannot Reach You (Netflix)

gif by @my-rose-tinted-glasses

Next up, another high school tale, but with a totally different vibe. This show is kind of a revelation in its willingness to tell a story about overwhelming desire—including sexual desire—with young protagonists. It’s rooted in a classic but often misunderstood trope, friends to lovers, and takes the angst of it seriously, giving us a low stakes story that feels extremely high stakes to our leads. It’s also gorgeous and uses a classic Japanese visual style (bokeh) that you’ll be dying to learn more about. 

His (Viki)

gif by @gabrielokun

Time for a break from high school, and we’ll sprinkle in a movie for some added flavor. His is a jbl film featuring a second chance romance between a stoic, introverted man who moves to a remote town to start over, and his ex-boyfriend who follows him there unexpectedly, adorable child in tow. Importantly, this movie does not take place in what we often refer to as the “bl bubble” where homophobia doesn’t exist; the leads’ experiences of being gay men in a homophobic society are hugely important to the plot and themes of the story. It’s a beautiful film and I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve watched it. @bengiyo would surely also like me to tell you that this film follows a brief prequel show called His: I Didn’t Mean to Fall in Love about the characters originally meeting in high school; I do not think it’s really necessary to watch it but completists can start there.

The Pornographer series (Gaga)

By now you should be ready to get into some classic Japanese fucked up psychosexual material, right? Right! The Pornographer series is told in five installments in this order:

The Novelist, a six episode miniseries

Mood Indigo, a six episode prequel series

Spring Life, a 15 minute short

Pornographer: Playback, a two hour film

Spring Life Continued, a 15 minute short

Confused by that distribution model? So say we all; sometimes Japan likes to make us work for it to make sure we really appreciate its many gifts to us. The story across these installments is about a very difficult to love protagonist, what makes him the way he is, and the also-unhinged-but-in-a-different-way man who finally gets through to him. It’s an extremely satisfying love story and one of the best character arcs I have ever seen, full stop. For this one, you’ll want to just pull the word problematic out of your pocket and store it in a drawer; nearly everything that happens in this story is problematic and that’s the point. Lean in! All of these installments except for the film are on Gaga, if you get that far hmu and I will supply you with the final puzzle piece.

Our Dining Table (Gaga)

You could probably use a break after those last two, so it’s time to shift over to a heart-tugging twofer: family trauma mixed with the cutest shit you’ve ever seen. ODT is an example of another classic type of Japanese show: the food drama (you will see the GOAT in this category at the end of this list). In Japanese culture, food is love, and the act of preparing food for your loved ones is a common path to romance. You’ll love this story about an isolated office worker who meets a pair of brothers, learns to cook as a way of connecting with them, and begins to heal from his own trauma as a result. The image above is a scan from the manga, which @troubled-mind curates to make extremely cool comparison sets like this one. Many jbls are faithful adaptations of yaoi manga source material, so it’s good to have a bit of familiarity with them.

Minato’s Laundromat (Gaga)

gif by @liyazaki

Japanese media loves to explore taboo, and often manages to do it in a way that is surprisingly light and chaste. This is an age gap romance between a teenager and his adult neighbor that explores internalized homophobia, emotional repression, and falling in love across seemingly impossible social chasms. It’s also a great example of old school yaoi seme-uke dynamics that still show up across the bl genre. Also, take my advice: end your journey with this one with the first season and just pretend season 2 doesn’t exist.

Eternal Yesterday (Viki)

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Remember what I said about weird? Time to do that again, but with a heaping dose of grief and pain on top. It’s not a spoiler to tell you this show involves a major character death; a major character death is, in fact, the root of the entire story. This is a magic realist tale of first love turned tragic, and it will hurt and heal you. It is one of my favorite dramas of all time.

Restart After Come Back Home (Gaga)

And now for a break for your poor exhausted brain. This film is basically the jbl version of a Hallmark original movie, about a city boy who goes back home to the country and falls in love with a total sweetheart while working together on a farm. Enjoy it, bestie, you’ve earned it! 

Tokyo in April Is… (Gaga)

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

You’ve probably noticed by now that emotional repression and failed communication are big themes in Japanese works. This second chance romance has plenty of both, and it’s a great example of a kind of muted emotional style that Japan does so well, where the surface of the story seems almost placid and calm even as deep emotion roils underneath. This one (and Eternal Yesterday above) are part of a special line up of jbls on Japanese channel MBS called Tonku (Drama) Shower. The shows air one after another in the same time slot on Fridays (in Japan, perhaps Thursdays for you depending on where you live) and you truly never know what you’re gonna get, but they’re all interesting. Warnings on this one for sexual assault and trauma. 

The End of the World With You (Viki)

Time for sexy and weird again, but even more so! This has to be one of the most unique bls ever made; it goes to some truly divine and strange places, and it feels incredibly queer while doing it. Made by the same screenwriter/director of the Pornographer series with a lot of the same sensibilities, but in a more heightened apocalyptic setting. This one has existential angst, a road trip, a redemption tale, and a variety of interesting side characters in the mix.

What Did You Eat Yesterday? (Gaga)

gif by @my-rose-tinted-glasses

Congratulations, you’ve reached the end of the list and your reward is watching one of the best bls of all time, and a perfect slice of life food drama to boot. WDYEY now has two seasons (along with a couple specials and a movie that fall in between) because the universe clearly loves us. You can now get it on Gaga for easy access but I’m partial to the versions over at @kinounaniresource for better subs. Wherever you watch, settle in to get cozy with Shiro and Kenji and make sure to always eat before you hit play.

[kinnbig]

✨ Simple Gif Colouring for Beginners ✨

I wrote up my basic gif colouring process for a friend recently, but a couple of people here mentioned they'd also find it helpful! so, as requested, this is a beginner-friendly walkthrough of the way I colour my gifs :) it's aimed at brand new gif makers with no prior experience with photoshop or photo editing.

when I first started gif making I found colouring and photoshop in general suuuper daunting, so I've tried to simplify everything here as much as possible. hopefully this will be relatively easy to follow and not too intimidating!

a couple of things to begin with:

I'm only talking about colouring here - this is not a full gif making tutorial. I've linked to some of my favourites of those here!

I personally like to make bright, 'clean' looking gifs with vibrant but natural colours, so that is the style of colouring this tutorial is geared towards. most of gif colouring is subjective and about personal taste - the only thing that I'd say is possible to get wrong is skin tones, which I talk about a lot in this guide.

as I mostly gif Thai dramas, most of the advice is geared towards colouring for East Asian/South East Asian skin tones - but the techniques should be fairly universally applicable (and here are some tutorials that talk about gif colouring for other skin tones).

I'm not an expert! I'm not claiming this is the best or the only way to colour gifs - it's just how I do it.

this post is very image-heavy. if the images aren't loading (or the gifs are running slowly or cutting/looping weirdly), then try viewing the post in its own tab (rather than on the your dash or someone's blog) and refreshing the page.

okay, full walkthrough beneath the cut!

contents:

1. intro a. natural gif colouring goals b. very very basic colour theory 2. super simple colouring (the essentials) a. curves b. selective colour (and skin tone correction) c. hue/saturation d. saving and reusing colouring e. another simple colouring example 3. other adjustment layers a. brightness/contrast b. levels c. vibrance d. colour balance e. channel mixer 4. troubleshooting a. curves b. saturation 5. fin!

1. intro

the colouring part of gif making can be super overwhelming, especially if (like me when I first started!) you're completely new to photoshop and/or have no experience with colour theory or photo/video editing.

if you're opening photoshop and making gifs for the first time, I highly recommend getting used to making a few basic, uncoloured gifs to begin with. just to practice, rather than post anywhere (though you can always come back and colour them later if you want) - but it'll make the rest of the process much easier if you're already beginning to get used to working in timeline mode of photoshop. give yourself a bit of time to practice and get a feel for things like how many frames you tend to like in a gif, where you like to crop them for the best loop, what kind of aspect ratio you like etc* - so that you're not trying to navigate all of that for the first time on top of everything else!

* frames: for me between 60-90 frames is ideal, but 40-120 frames is the absolute min-max I'd personally use in a normal gifset loops: for the smoothest loops, try to avoid cutting someone off mid-movement or mid-word if possible. aspect ratio: for full-size (540px) gifs, I tend to go for either 8:5 (slightly 'skinnier' gifs), 7:5, or 5:4 (particularly big, thick gifs lmao)

✨ natural gif colouring goals

part of what can be so daunting about starting gif making is not knowing where to start or what you want to achieve. this is definitely something that gets easier with practice - the more gifs you make, the more you'll get a feel for what kind of look you like and the more instinctively you'll know how to get there. it also helps to see if any gif makers you like have made "before and after colouring" posts - these can help with getting a sense of the kinds of changes made through gif colouring. here's one I made!

in general, I like to make my gifs bright and 'clean' looking, with vibrant but natural colours. these are the things I'm usually hoping to achieve with colouring:

brighten dark scenes

remove muddy, yellowish lighting or filters

saturate colours

correct any skin lightening filters or overexposure

make lighting and colours as consistent as possible between gifs within a single gifset, especially gifsets featuring gifs from multiple scenes/episodes/videos

this guide is focusing on natural colouring, but of course there are many cool ways to make stylised/unnaturally coloured gifs. imo you'll need to master these basics first, but if you want to learn how to do things like change the background colour of gifs or use gradients or other cool effects, then @usergif's resource directory has loads of super helpful tutorials!

✨ very very basic colour theory

[disclaimer! I don't know shit about fuck. I do not study light or art. this is just an explanation that makes sense to me exclusively for the purposes of gif making.]

the primary colours for light/digital screens are red, blue, and green. having all three colours in equal measures neutralises them (represented by the white section in the middle of the diagram).

so to neutralise a colour within a gif, you need to add more of the colour(s) that are lacking.

in practice this usually means: the scene you want to gif is very yellow! yellow is made of red and green light, so to neutralise it you need to add more blue into your gif.

it can also mean the reverse: if you desaturate the yellow tones in a gif, it will look much more blue.

looking at the colour balance sliders on photoshop can make it easier to visualise:

so making a gif more red also means making it less cyan.

removing green from a gif means adding magenta.

taking yellow out of a gif will make it more blue.

tl;dr:

neutralise yellows by adding blue (and vice versa)

neutralise reds by adding cyan (and vice versa)

neutralise green by adding magenta (and vice versa)

2. super simple colouring (the essentials)

starting with a nice sharpened gif in photoshop in timeline mode. (these are the sharpening settings I use!)

some scenes are much harder to colour than others - it helps to start out practising with scenes that are bright/well-lit and that don't have harsh unnaturally coloured lights/filters on. scenes with a lot of brown/orange also tend to be harder.

I usually save a base copy of my gif before I start colouring just in case I end up hating it, or find out later that it doesn't quite fit right into a set and need to redo it etc.

so here is my base gif!

it's an okay gif, but it has a bit of a yellow tint to it that I want to reduce.

colouring is easiest to do in adjustment layers, which can be found under layer -> new adjustment layer - or for me they are here:

there are lots of different types of adjustment layers that do lots of different things - but for me the absolute essentials for colouring are curves, selective colour, and hue/saturation.

I also use brightness/contrast, levels, exposure, vibrance, colour balance, and channel mixer sometimes, depending on the gif - but I use curves, selective colour, and hue/saturation on every single gif.

✨ curves layer

the first thing I always do is a curves layer. when you first open one it will look like this:

first I usually click the ‘auto’ button, just to see what happens. sometimes it makes a big difference (it usually brightens the gif a lot) - but on this gif it didn’t do much.

if it had made the gif look nicer then I would have kept it and added a second curves layer on top to do the rest of these steps.

the next step is selecting the white and black points with the little eyedropper tools.

the bottom eyedropper lets you pick a white point for the gif. click somewhere super light on the gif to see what happens - for this gif, I clicked on the lampshade on the left. if it looks weird, I just undo it and try somewhere else - it usually takes a few goes to find something that looks good.

here's what that did to the gif:

then I pick the top eyedropper and use it to pick a black point by clicking somewhere really dark, again playing around until I find a black point that looks good.

here's what the gif looks like after picking the white and black points:

this can take some experimenting, but you can make super easy drastic changes to your gif just with this. in this case, the curves layer took out a lot of that yellowy tint.

and this is what the curves graph looks like now:

you can click and drag those lines to make further changes if you want - I usually leave them alone though. the colours of the lines indicate which colours have been changed in the gif - for example, you can see from that steep blue line on the graph that blue has been added to neutralise those yellows.

next I usually do another curves layer and just press the ‘auto’ button again to see what happens. usually it brightens the gif a bit more, which I like.

‼️if nothing is working: usually with a bit of fucking about a curves layer works well - but sometimes you can’t find a good white and black point anywhere, and instead your gif turns wacky colours and nothing looks good. this happens more often with very heavily colour tinted scenes :( the troubleshooting section at the end goes over some options, including starting with a levels layer instead.

✨ selective colour (and skin tone correction)

skin tones are made up of a mixture of yellow and red.

removing yellow (or adding blue or red) to a gif will make the skin-tones too red - and removing red (or adding cyan or yellow) to a gif will make the skin-tones too yellow.

adding blue to this gif with the curves layer took out the yellowy tint, which I wanted - but it also took the yellows out of Kim's skin tone, which I don’t want. so I need to put yellow back into the skin tones specifically - without putting it back into the rest of the gif.

selective colour layers let you select an individual colour and adjust the levels of other colours within that colour. you can change how yellow the green shades are, or how much cyan is in the blues, for example.

I need to add yellow back into the red tones to correct the skin tones on this gif. this is the case for most gifs in my experience - the vast majority of the time, unless a scene is very heavily tinted in another colour, a curves layer will add blue/remove yellow.

in the 'colors' dropdown, select the 'reds' section and drag the 'yellow' slider higher - this will add more yellow into just the red shades within the gif.

the amount of yellow you need to add back into the reds depends on how much yellow was taken out of the gif initially - I just play around with the slider until it looks right. if you're not sure, it helps to have some neutrally-coloured (not white-washed!) reference photos of the people in your gif to compare to.

here's the result. Kim's skin is a lot less pink toned and much more natural looking:

✨ hue/saturation

this adjustment layer lets you adjust the hue and saturation of the gif as a whole, and also of each colour individually.

I don't use the hue or lightness sliders unless I'm trying to do something more complicated with the colouring.

clicking the dropdown menu that says 'master' lets you edit the saturation of each colour individually. this is useful if your gif is still super tinted in one colour.

I thought the yellows on this gif were still slightly too bright, so I switched to the yellow channel and desaturated them slightly. (remember if you do this then you need to go back to selective colour and add more yellow into the red skin tones to balance out the desaturation!)

then I increased the 'master' saturation of all the colours to +5:

I usually find the right amount of saturation is somewhere between +5 and +12, but it depends on the gif.

‼️if the gif feels undersaturated, but the saturation slider isn't helping/is making the colours worse, try a vibrance layer instead.

done!

✨ saving and reusing colouring

you can copy and paste adjustment layers between gifs to make your colouring even across each of your gifs for one scene - so if you're making a set of multiple gifs of the same scene, or you think you might want to gif the same scene again in the future, you can save it as a psd so you can reuse the colouring again later.

each gif's colouring will then still need tweaking - different cameras/angles/shots of the same scene can still start out with slightly different colouring.

I recommend uploading the gifs as a draft post on tumblr so you can see what they all look like next to each other and catch any inconsistencies.

✨ another one! (speedrun!)

HI KEN!

the white point for the curves layer was in the window behind them.

the curves layer removes the muddy yellow tint, but again it makes their skin tones (especially Ken's) very red toned, which is adjusted by the selective colour layer.

3. other adjustment layers

imo many many gifs can be coloured really nicely with just those three adjustment layers, but some need different adjustments.

✨ brightness/contrast

pretty self explanatory!

I personally usually avoid using the 'brightness' slider because I rarely like the effect - I only tend to use the 'contrast' one. 

the 'auto' button is sometimes useful though, especially if you’re struggling with the curves layer.

✨ levels

levels alters the white and black points of the gif, like curves - but unlike curves it doesn't also alter other colours.

use the sliders beneath the graph to alter how dark/light the gif is. you can slide the black slider further to the right to make the blacks darker, and the white slider to the left to make the whites lighter.

levels is a good place to start if your curves layer isn't working.

(I'm going to hit the image limit for this post lol so here are some screenshots of a table I made to demonstrate this rather than actual gifs. sorry!)

on both sides, I dragged the sliders up to where the big jumps are on the graph - this is usually a good place to start!

✨ vibrance

vibrance... makes the colours more vibrant. it's more subtle than saturation.

it's really helpful for gifs that feel grey. sometimes adjusting saturation just makes the greys kind of weirdly tinted, but a vibrance layer can fix that.

vibrance is much more subtle!

✨ colour balance

colour balance affects the overall balance of colours within a gif.

it's good for scenes with heavy tints.

I tend to stick to the 'midtones' dropdown, but you can also alter the colour balance within the shadows and highlights if you want.

✨ channel mixer

I avoided channel mixer for such a long time because it scared me. but it's great for scenes that are very heavily tinted in one colour.

basically, it works with the levels of red, green, and blue within a gif. you select an output colour and then play around with the levels of the colour you selected within each other colour.

kind of the reverse of selective colour?

so in the 'blue' channel, the levels of blue are at 100%, and the levels of red and green are at 0% - but you can impact how much blue is in the reds and greens and blues.

this tutorial explains it well - but imo the best way to get to grips with channel mixer is just to play around with it a bit (sorry)

(when I made this guide for my friend, I also made a slightly more complicated gif colouring walk-through that included using channel mixer. there isn't space to include it within this post, but if anyone is interested I could always upload it as an 'intermediate' gif colouring tutorial - lmk!)

4. troubleshooting

‼️curves

usually with a bit of fucking about a curves layer works well - but sometimes you can’t find a good white and black point anywhere, and instead your gif turns wacky colours and nothing looks good. this happens more often with very heavily colour tinted scenes :(

for example, with this base gif:

using many of the brightest points as a white point turn it wacky colours, like this:

yikes :(

some options for these cases:

try brightening the gif first with the 'auto' button on the curves layer or with a levels layer. having a brighter gif to start with can give you better options for picking a white point.

try finding an alternate, whiter/brighter white point. look for places the light reflects - on this gif, using the light on Porsche's cheekbone works well as the white point. it also helps to find places that would be white if the scene wasn't tinted - the lightest part of a white shirt is often a good place to start, for example.

skip the curves layer, and instead use a levels layer to alter your white/black points, and colour balance or channel mixer to balance the colours.

‼️over/undersaturation

if your gif (especially the skintones) is looking a little washed out or lifeless, it might be undersaturated. boost that saturation - or if that's not working, try a vibrance layer.

oversaturation is often easiest to spot in the mouths and ears of any people in a gif. if the mouths are looking unnaturally, vibrantly red, then you've gone too far with the saturation.

5. fin!

and done! I hope this was coherent helpful to somebody.

if there's anything that I've missed or that doesn't make sense pls feel free to shoot me an ask or a message and I'll do my best to help! I've also collated a bunch of additional reading/resources below.

happy gifmaking 🥰

✨ some links!

photoshop basics by @selenapastel

gifmaking for beginners by @hayaosmiyazaki

gifmaking guide for beginners by @saw-x

dreamy's gif tutorial by @scoupsy-remade (includes instructions on how to blur out burned-on subtitles or annoying video graphics)

beginner's guide to channel mixer by @aubrey-plaza

how to fix orange-washed characters by aubrey-plaza

colour correcting and fixing dark scenes by @kylos

does resampling matter? by usergif

how to put multiple gifs on one canvas by @fictionalheroine

watermarking using actions by @wonwooridul

resource directory by @usergif

[nataliasquote]

Double the trouble [pt.1] | n romanoff

Double the trouble au: part 1, part 2

Summary: Natasha and Wanda’s teenage twin daughters are a lot to handle, but despite their differences and arguments, there’s nothing they wouldn’t do for each other

Age: 17

Warnings: none

Pairings: WandaNat

wc: 3.9k

note: my first time putting a one shot on tumblr. Here goes nothing

— ⧗ —

"Y/N! Mom told me to come wake you. You're gonna be late." Isla stood at the door, her arms folded with a cocky smirk plastered on her face.

Y/N groaned and turned over in her bed, flinging an arm over her face as she squinted into the light to see who was speaking. The familiar outline of her twin sister came into view and she rolled back over.

"Y/N. Get up. Or don't. It's not my fault if you're late." And with that, the girl was gone, the door swinging shut as a cloud of floral perfume was all that was left in her place.

"Good morning to you too." Y/N muttered under her breath as she pulled her phone off charge and checked the time. Her stomach dropped as 7:19 flashed up on her screen. School started at 8:00. They left at 7:45. She did not have long at all.

"Isla I'm gonna kill you!" The distressed teenager screamed out, running over to her closet to pull out the first half decent outfit she could find. Any feeling of tiredness evaporated from her body as she got dressed, which was probably the only positive to come out of this morning.

A knock sounded on her bedroom door as she pulled her shirt over her head. Wanda's head popped around before she saw it was safe for her to enter. She watched her daughter getting frustrated over her hair for a moment before walking over with a plate of freshly made toast and fruit. There wasn't much time to eat it but Wanda was the kind of mother who made sure all of her girls were fed. Even when Nat was feeling stubborn.

"Good morning sweetheart. I brought breakfast." It was an obvious thing to send but Y/N smiled gratefully at her in the mirror for a split second before a large tangle in her hair caused her to wince.

"Thanks Mom."

"Do you want me to send Mama up to help with your hair?" As a typical mom, Wanda collected a few spare cups from her daughter's desk and stacked them in her hand. Y/N attacked her hair with her hairbrush before setting it down on the table with a thud.

"No! I'm not 4! I can do my own hair!" She exclaimed. She didn't normally talk to Wanda that way, but the stress of being late was taking its toll so Wanda didn't take offence.

"Okay. Well, you've got 15 minutes."

Y/N groaned loudly and started on her make up, having given up on her hair. A ponytail would suffice for today. She did not have the patience.

"Isla, you know you can't leave without your sister. So I don't know what trick you're playing on her, but if she's late then you're late." Wanda went into stern mother mode as she entered the kitchen, where her eldest (by 11 minutes) was sat at the table drinking her breakfast smoothie.

The teenager looked up in offence at her mother, who just shot her a warning look. "I didn-" She was cut off by another glare from Wanda.

The mother tapped the side of her head. "Mind reader. Remember?"

"What's this about mind reading?" Nat questioned as she walked into the kitchen, going straight over to her wife to wrap her in a hug and a kiss. Isla turned back to her phone and the women looked over at their daughter. "And where's Y/N?"

"Well, someone turned her sister's alarm off so she's currently rushing around upstairs."

Nat sent her famous disappointed look to Isla, who cowered slightly. Wanda was easy to get around, often being far too soft with her girls. Natasha was the tough parent, but she still cared. Being a dance teacher and studio owner meant she was an expert in tough love. "Isla... why?"

The teenager shrugged. "I don't know. I just thought it was funny. I was gonna wake her up but I lost track of time." She pulled a lock of perfectly curled hair out of her face and Nat knew what had made her 'lose track of time'.

"You don't do that again, okay?" Isla nodded, not wanting to start an argument before 8am. She wasn't a bad person, but her ideas of teasing her sister and playing jokes weren't exactly the best.

"Hey my love," Wanda hummed as Nat passed her again with a kiss. "Can you go see if Y/N needs any help? She might benefit from your braiding skills today, even though she was okay."

Natasha smiled, nodding. She loved braiding her daughters' hair. Even at 17, when the twins claimed they were too old for it, they secretly loved Nat's braids. Especially Y/N, who found her mom doing her hair at lot during dance show season.

There was just over 5 minutes before they needed to leave so Nat tentatively entered Y/N's room, observing the girl before talking. The teenager was threading her earrings into her ears, the rest of her jewellery already in place. Make up was scattered across the desk and her hairbrush was on the other side of the room. Her hair hung down her back in a dark red curtain, the ends curling naturally slightly. It looked smooth but wasn't styled, and Nat smiled.

"Hey sweet girl. Can I help?" She sat on Y/N's bed slightly, picking up the backpack by the floor and slotting her daughter's laptop and charger into the right compartment. She didn't snoop around, but instead put it back on the floor by her feet.

"I just need to finish my make up. How long do I have?" Y/N took a bite of toast as Nat checked her watch.

"5 minutes. Do you want braids? I can do them in 2 minutes. And I won't be in your way." Y/N was hesitant as she applied her concealer, frantically blending it in. Wasn't her neatest job but she still wanted to be presentable.

"Okay but please make it quick."

Nat sprung into action, gathering up a small section of hair to begin braiding. The two worked in silence, with there being no time to walk. As Nat tied off the first braid, Y/N leaned forwards to curl her lashes before Nat started again on the other side. The braids were only small, taking the front sections of Y/N's hair to keep them out of her face during the day.

Being a dancer, she kept her hair long but there was so much of it that it got in the way a lot. So she rarely had it fully down, either claw clips or braids holding back. Isla rarely wore braids, wanting to differentiate herself from her sister at school. They got mixed up enough as it was.

"Okay. All done." Nat stepped back as Y/N applied her final coat of lipgloss. She smiled as she saw the braids but didn't have time to admire them before a jangle of keys was heard and a voice yelled up the stairs.

"Y/N! Let's go!"

"Always so polite." Nat said sarcastically with a smile to Y/N. She handed her daughter her backpack and gave her a quick hug before the girl rushed out of the room, Nat following behind more calmly.

"Love you Mama! Love you Mom!" Y/N shouted over her shoulder, running out of the house with a slice of her toast in her hand.

"Have a great day girls." The women called out, watching the car pull away from the driveway. Isla got her permit before Y/N so she was the designated taxi girl in the family now. Y/N hated it, but driving wasn't her strongest suit so she stuck out the irritating chatter of her sister until she was finally ready for her own permit.

"Everyday I'm still surprised at how similar yet so different they are." Wanda commented, her hands wrapped round her mug of tea. Nat mirrored her from her side, her mug containing coffee instead.

"They look like a carbon copy of each other and yet sometimes I feel it's like they're from different planets." This made Wanda laugh slightly, her breathy giggle never failing to put a smile on her wife's face.

"I mean, you wouldn't find Isla in a dance studio anymore. But then Y/N practically lives there. And you wouldn't find her on the athletics track either, unlike Isla. We must have done something right... right?"

Nat sidled up to her wife and wrapped her arms around her waist, mug now abandoned on the counter. "You, my dear, are the best mom those girls could ask for." She looked into the green eyes she knew far too well before pressing a kiss to the lips she had memorised and could draw in her sleep. "We've done everything we can do for them. And our girls are the toughest girls in the world."

"And they're ours."

"Our little babies." Nat said with a soft smile, her head leaning down to rest on Wanda's shoulder.

"Don't let Y/N hear you saying that. She was snappy about me thinking she was 4 earlier."

"That girl is a whirlwind. She's as wild as her hair sometimes." Wanda reached up and pushed a lock of Nat's red hair behind her ear, admiring the colour which matched the twins' almost perfectly.

"And I know just where she gets it from." The Sokovian said with a smile before kissing her wife. Nat tried to deepen it now it was just them, but Wanda pulled back. "I have work to do. As much as I'd love to stay here with you all day, those emails won't answer themselves." She left the room with an aura of grace surrounding her and Nat found herself staring at the door way long after she was gone.

— ⧗ —

The day went by quite fast. Wanda worked in her office until 4pm, whilst Nat left for her studio at 1pm to start preparing that evening's classes. Competition season was a stressful time but she handled herself well, staying on top of what she needed and when.

The final bell rang and the corridors were soon filled with hoards of teenagers, everyone racing to get home as quickly as possible. Y/N and Isla stopped by their lockers, chatting with friends as they exchanged the textbooks needed for tonight's homework.

Despite their quarrels and petty arguments, the twins shared the same group of friends at school. They were known by everyone, but Bucky, Maria, Clint, Kate and Steve made up their main group. They were pretty popular, partly due to the fact that there wasn't a single person who disliked their moms. Nat and Wanda were the favourite parents which somehow elevated the girls' social status in school. Maybe it was also because of the parties they were allowed to host.

Natasha and Wanda's main focus was to give their girls as normal of a life as they possible could. Which meant letting them live like teenagers. Going to football games, school dances, hosting house parties, trips to the mall with friends. Anything that normal teenagers did was allowed. Alcohol was monitored and smoking and drugs was a strict no. But the twins followed the rules, knowing they were a lot luckier than most.

"Shit. Mom needs me in the studio." Y/N read aloud as her locker slammed shut. Isla peered down at her sister's phone and sighed.

"Y/N I've got track practice in 15 minutes. I can't get you there and back in time." Her sports bag hung off her shoulder and she watched her sister grab the emergency dance bag from her locker that she kept purely for times like this. "Well, I suppo-"

"I can take you" Bucky spoke. He was leaning with his back against the lockers like he usually did, watching Y/N with a soft smile.

"No I-" Isla started to protest but stopped herself. She knew how much Bucky was crushing on her sister and she was in full support. "Actually, Bucky, that would be amazing." Everyone else was aware of his crush, all except Y/N. She was completely oblivious, which obviously Isla took full advantage of and teased her about it almost on a daily basis.

"Do you know where it is?" Y/N asked casually. She had been crouched down by her bags to swap her stuff over and so had missed the looks and glances that everyone shared as Bucky offered. So as she stood back up everyone was smiling wide which confused her. "What?"

"Yeah my little sister does ballet on saturdays there and I pick her up sometimes." Bucky had already fished his car keys out and was tossing them in his hand.

Y/N noticed her sister's smirk out of the corner of her eye as they all walked to the exit of the school. "Isla, what is it?"

"Nothing. You guys have fun. But not too much fun." And with a wink, she turned towards the track and ran off to join her friends who were already on their way over in the distance. Everyone else said goodbye and went their separate ways for the night, leaving Bucky and Y/N by his car.

Y/N was definitely the kindest out of the twins, so she could easily make conversation with anyone. She didn't think anything special of the car ride to her mom's studio, except maybe that Bucky was really nice to offer her a ride. It was only a 10 minute drive but she was still so grateful.

"Thanks a lot for this, by the way." Y/N said as she stared out of the window. She knew this route like the back of her hand but something about the sun shining through the trees made it extra special today.

Bucky shook his head. "It's no problem. Always happy to help."

Y/N looked over and smiled at him. "You're a really good friend. I'm glad I've got you."

Bucky's smile slipped but he fixed it quickly as they came to a red light. Once again he was pushed back into the friend zone, but it was his fault for not making his feelings known. As he looked over at her, the sun catching her red hair, making it look like fire, her body swaying slightly to the music of "You Make Loving Fun", he realised just how much he liked her. But Y/N was sweet to everyone, so it held him back. Maybe she didn't see him the way he saw her. Or maybe she liked someone else.

His thoughts had distracted him and the lights turned green, earning a soft poke in the arm from Y/N who gestured to the lights.

They both hummed along to the music and chatted the rest of the way, Y/N sending her mom a quick text as they caught the rush hour traffic.

"You really are amazing for doing this. I'll pay you back at some point, I promise!" Y/N gratefully thanked him as she grabbed her bags to climb out of the car. Bucky offered to get out and help but Y/N's stubborn nature refused any help.

"Don't worry about it. Enjoy yourself. You're an amazing dancer!" He leaned out of the window and waved as he drove off, sending a blush creeping across Y/N's face.

Maybe the feelings were reciprocated. Just a little...

"Hey angel," Nat called out as Y/N walked through the main entrance doors.

"Hi Mama."

"Who was that outside?" Nat asked after Y/N said hi to the receptionist. She made her way over to her mother, who was stood by the door to the main studio and cafe.

"Oh, Bucky gave me a lift here. Isla had track so she couldn't get back in time." Nat couldn't help the smirk that crept onto her face, identical to the one Isla wore just before they left school.

"Oh so that's Bucky? Nice." She turned around and walked down the hall, leaving Y/N to chase after her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" The teenager called out, but Nat just shrugged and checked the windows outside studio 1b. "Mama. Please tell me. Isla had the same smirk. I'm not stupid so just tell me what's going on."

Y/N's huff and pout made Nat 'aw' and she pinched her daughter's cheek before her hand was quickly slapped away. "Nothing baby. I just expected to see Isla, that's all. Not Bucky."

Y/N folded her arms over her chest, careful not to let her backpack or sports bag slip off her shoulders. "I don't believe you."

Nat patted her on the head and unlocked the door to the studio. "Okay. Now come on. I want to work on your solo. We have that turns section to sort out so hurry up and get changed."

Y/N groaned and dropped her back off her shoulder, where it landed with a muffled thud ad her feet. "Mom give me a minute. I just got here."

"I have no minutes to give. It's comp season, you know that Y/N/N. No time to waste." Nat was already over in the speaker corner, connecting her laptop up so it was ready. "Why are you still standing there?"

"Can I just have 2 minutes to breathe?"

Natasha turned around and placed her hands on her hips, mirroring her daughter perfectly. "Do you want Yelena to take your private instead? She's free right now actually. I could be teaching junior tap instead."

Y/N's eyes went wide and she quickly grabbed her discarded bag. "No no! I'll hurry. I'll change and be back! Please don't sent Yelena in here!"

"Good. And I won't. She's taking your class for ballet later anyway. So you have that to enjoy."

The teenager was halfway to the changing room before she stopped dead in her tracks. That was her worst nightmare. "Mama! She's gonna be all 'Those feet are horrible. Point them. Why do your hands look like claws. Are you a crab? Are we doing Little Mermaid dance? Your posture is like potato couch. Why are none of you flexible?'" Her Russian accent sounded nothing like her aunt, which made Nat raise an eyebrow. She'd taught her daughters better than that. Or so she thought.

"Potato couch?"

"I think she meant couch potato. But yeah she said that to Becca last week. It helped though. Her posture was better last night."

"Then she's a good teacher." Such a know it all.  "Do you stretch every night?"

Y/N went to answer and Nat gave her a knowing look. "Well, not every night."

"Then everything Yelena says is true. So don't complain. She tells me everything."

"I don't see how you guys are sisters. You're so different. She makes you seem almost angelic." Y/N fiddled with the lock on the changing room door.

"Exactly what your mom and I say about you and Isla. Now stop being cheeky and go get changed. And I want the hi-cut black leotard because we're working on legs today. Oh, and Y/N, bring your half soles because I don't want to completely destroy your feet before the rest of your classes." Natasha was bossy but it's what made her one of the best teachers around. She knew what she wanted and what it took to get there. She could recognise the potential in her dancers but would only work with those who put the work in themselves.

There was something so special about working with your daughter. Nat loved it, even if she didn't get to do privates like this much. Yes, she went into dance teacher mode and Y/N was no exception, but the pride she felt when she watched her daughter dance was something she didn't feel as much with the other dancers. Just like when she watched Isla win her races, seeing Y/N dance made her heart swell so much it felt as though it would burst.

10 minutes later and Y/N emerged from the changing room, a hair tie between her teeth as she pulled her hair up into a ponytail. Nat wasn't strict on hair with privates, only with normal class. So she just put on some calming music and started stretching with her daughter. Yes, it was weird seeing her mom effortlessly do the splits, but Y/N was used to it by now.

They gossiped the whole time, Y/N filling her in on any school drama that was of interest. As Y/N moved to the bar to stretch her leg holds, Nat couldn't hold back her questions anymore.

"What's going on with you and Bucky?" Nat asked and then burst out laughing as she turned to face her daughter. Y/N had her right leg pulled up to her head, but the most confused and shocked expression on her face. It truly was a hilarious sight.

"Uh- nothing? But I feel like you know something I don't? That's the second time you've asked me today."

Nat shrugged. "Well, he gave you a lift. I'm just curious."

"Well there's nothing to be curious about." She switched legs as she was talking. "He's just a friend. You know that. We've literally been friends since middle school!"

"Okay. I'll just ask Isla then." Nat smirked and walked over to her laptop.

"Mama, she will just tell you the same! And if she doesn't then she's just causing drama. Or making my life a living hell."

"She's your sister. That's what she's supposed to do. You do the exact same to her, even if you don't think so." Y/N rolled her eyes, moving to the centre of the room. "Okay, let's run it. You ready?"

"Is that why you and Aunt Yelena can't direct the same dance show? Because you argue?" Y/N smirked as her mom shook her head. "I'm right aren't I?"

"No you're not. And she's Miss Yelena to you. Just like I'm Miss Natasha. Now, dance."

"Yes Mama." Y/N wore a shit eating grin as she moved to her starting position, trying to get into the character of her dance so she didn't burst out laughing.

She was grateful for the relationship she had with both her moms and family meant the most to her. Even Isla had a special place in her heart, despite their quarrels and petty arguments. Those sisters would do anything for each other if it came down to it. Which was surprising to everyone except Wanda and Natasha. They saw the sisterly bond like no one else did. It was unbreakable.

[faegutz]

Hmmmm cuz I have a headache rn, what about the 141( + Konig and Los vaqueros) helping a gn reader with a migrane?

migraines and how they help ☆ pairing: 141 + los vaqueros + konig × gn! reader

authors note: i barely have migraines but when i do it hurts so much. Im gonna be honest and say im not too proud of these and i had no idea what to write sometimes- But hope you feel better soon anon and i hope you enjoy! :)

tags: migraine, hurt comfort?, domestic, probably ooc, medicine mentions, soft cod men

"CAPTAIN JOHN PRICE"

- dad mode activated !

- has a whole cabinet specifically full of medicine, some thermometers, etc.

- gives you some aspirin and water

- the type to make you go to bed and nap and will refuse to let you get out of bed or do anything yourself

- just tell him what you need and he'll get it!! no need to get up

- will lay down with you and caress your face, occassionaly giving you soft kisses on the forehead

- will always take care of you when you dont feel good and make sure you feel better before he stops

"Let me take care of you,"

"SIMON GHOST RILEY"

- kinda confused on how hes supposed to help you but hes trying okay

- will go to the store and get you something that will help you with the pain

- hes never really taken care of someone before so hes a little awkward

- he wants you to lay down and get some rest but he also doesnt want to baby you

- so he just kinda stands there while you do your thing, watching and waiting in case you need his help with anything

- if you ask him to lay down with you, he will and he'll make sure to hold you close

- "It's okay, love,"

"JOHN SOAP MACTAVISH"

- i feel like he gets sick maybe once a year so he has no clue how to even help with a migraine

- will stand in the medicine aisle at the store, staring at every single thing thats on the shelf and having no clue what to grab

- doesnt want to call you and bother you because youre in pain, so he ends up asking someone else in the aisle what the hell youre supposed to get for a migraine

- gets home about 5 minutes later than he should because he took so long just standing in the store with a confused look on his face

- will make you soup or something warm because that usually helped him when he was sick or in pain

- he almost started a fire because he forgot he was even making you food since he was more distracted by worrying over you and making sure you were comfortable !! how fun

- "Uh, the soup is burnt.."

"KYLE GAZ GARRICK"

- he definitely gets sick often, and hes almost an expert on how to help you

- makes sure you drink water regularly and occasionally take an aspirin

- most of the migraines hes ever gotten was because he was stressed

- so he practically gives you a therapy session and asks you what gave you the headache and if you were stressed

- lets you just talk it out if you were stressed

- keeps a close eye on you and makes sure you drink enough water and that you eat

- "Tell me whats been bothering you,"

"ALEJANDRO VARGAS"

- immediately notices that youre in pain when he sees you wince or squint your eyes

- is ready with pain medication and some water

- he offers to give you a back massage and hes very skilled with his hands so it feels amazing

- he makes sure to close all the blinds or curtains so its darker inside so the pain is less for you

- whispers in your ear about how much he loves you just so you feel relaxed and comfortable

- gives you kisses on the top of your head and soothingly rubs your back in circles

- "Te amo mucho,"

"RODOLFO RUDY PARRA"

- out of all the characters on this list, I have a feeling he would definitely be the best caretaker for you

- makes sure you get sleep and drink water, will literally hold you down if he has to

- he holds you against his chest while you sleep, staying by your side the whole time

- will cook meals for you and basically do everything for you

- suggests turning on some soothing noises or guided meditation sounds on the TV that will help you relax

- he also will brush your hair/do your hair for you if you find it relaxing

- "Solo relájate, cariño."

"KONIG"

- ohh hes so sorry that youre in pain and he tries his best to comfort you in any way he can

- hes not sure what to do himself but if you ask anything of him he will get right on it

- frequently asks if youre comfortable or if you need him to do anything

- it almost gets annoying, but he just wants to make sure youre taken care of and that you feel better soon

- he has no clue how to cook most things so he does the next best thing and goes to the store and buys all your favorite snacks for you

- "Do you need anything else, meine liebe?"

[dawnofh]

Getting saved by 141 [Headcannon]

Price

Disappointment but not surprised, how hard was it to stay put and don’t get kidnapped?

Made an entire rescue mission just to get you back.

Was the first face you saw when he came to your aid.

“I’ve got you Son.” Reassured you that you were alright and in safe hands.

“I’m sorry Sir, I told them about the team’s whereabouts…” could care less that you gave them information, more about the fact you were tortured for it.

Shines a flashlight in your eyes and tells you to follow it just to make sure you’re still functioning.

Is angry but not at you, likely at himself for allowing one of his own to be taken.

Will offer to carry you on his back if you can’t walk.

Patches up your wounds by himself, warns you in advance when disinfecting the wounds, “This is going to hurt like a bitch so suck it up.”

10/10, give this man father of the year. Don’t expect candy from this man, he will offer you a cigar though.

You’re on probation. Don’t even try change Price’s mind. He’ll just give you a pat on the back and apologise, “It’s for your own good, Kid.”

Checks up on your mental state daily and recommends you a military councillor.

Ghost

Knight in military uniform.

Sneaks into the warehouse you’re being held captive in.

Stealthy asf, no one ever sees this man coming and if they do then it’s already too late.

Jumpscare.

If he isn’t opening fire then he’s probably throwing knives into necks.

Throws you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes if you’re injured, doesn’t matter what injury, he’s just not patient.

Stabs adrenaline into you to keep you alive.

“You breathing, Soldier?” Gently slaps your face to keep you awake.

Will undress you from your uniform without second thought to patch up a wound so you don’t bleed out.

Sits next to you on the plane ride back to monitor your state. If you were unconscious when he found you then he’d allow you to lay on his shoulder but if you’re conscious he’ll make sure you stay that away until you’ve received medical attention.

If you’re the former then he’s probably not the best face to wake up to.

“Holy shit, am I dead?” “You nearly were.” “Because I’m seeing a Ghost.” “I still don’t find you funny.”

He definitely killed everyone in that warehouse for harming one of his own but will never admit that to you and simply just tells you, “Everything is taken care of, Kid. Go rest up.”

Puts you on probation and during that probation he’ll teach you some moves so that he doesn’t have to save you again.

Soap

*Panicked Scottish noises*

Radios you over and over to try get your location, when he finds out you’ve been taken he goes into Captain Mactavish mode.

Doesn’t really make a plan, runs straight into danger. Definitely blows something up just to live up to the demolition expert title.

Would quite literally NOT tackle someone out of a window onto a car but simply will throw them out of one. That Captain Mactavish mode has its limits.

Rushes to your side and cuts off your restraints. Cups your face with his gloved hand and tilts your head back and forth to check for any head injuries. You could be staring him dead in his eyes and he’d still check your pulse.

Will fireman carry you if you can’t walk or you’re unconscious.

Clicks his fingers in your face and then asks you how many fingers he’s holding up. You look at him dumbfounded, “5…?” “Fuckin hell you need medical treatment…”

If you’re falling off to sleep then he’ll keep you awake by teaching you some Scottish slang. “So you’re telling me that Elizabeth or Lizzie is slang for…coffin dodger?” “Or old cunt.” “I will be sure to use that more often now.” “Aye but do be careful of who you’re saying it around. You know how Brits get.” “……”

Gets Price to put you on probation even if the injuries aren’t serious. He’s just not taking any chances.

Gaz

“You broken?”

Panic mechanic Gaz.

Acts on his knee jerker responses to which needs Price to hold him back and keep him in check.

Threw tear gas through the vents and came through the roof opening fire. Couple of knives went through eyes, one of them nearly hit you. So much for a rescue mission.

Gaz would probably stare at you if you’re unconscious to see if you’re breathing or not. Gets up real close to your face, “Okay good, you’re still alive.” He was just afraid to be the one to collect your dog tag so he didn’t want to check your pulse.

Doesn’t have enough muscle mass to pick you up so would either drag you out of danger or let you lean on his shoulder.

Gaz is definitely the type to over bandage you, “Can never be to safe than sorry.” You looked mummified after he’s done with you.

Will let you sleep on his lap if he found you unconscious, after every 5 minutes he put a finger below your nose to check if you’re still breathing.

If he found you awake he tries his best to keep you awake, “Hey buddy, keep your eyes open or else you’re going to die.”

Doesn’t sugarcoat, tells you exactly what injuries you have, “I think your knee is dislocated, do you want me to relocate it now?” “Sergeant, please don’t.” Will relocate it anyway.

Tells you about his life story and how he got recruited into 141, “I was born at a very young age.” He really tries to lighten the mood.

Threatens to shatter your kneecaps if you don’t take at least 5 weeks off.

[tropes-and-tales]

Sleep to Dream

Day 10:  Somnophilia (Beau "Cyclone" Simpson x F!Reader)

(For the 2023 Kinktober event that I created on my own because I am boring and basic and am trying to keep it simple this year...found here!) 

CW:  Somnophilia; dub-con (because of the somnophilia, but consent is discussed obliquely); smut (PiV, unprotected; possibly a hint of breeding kink?); 18+ only.

Word Count:  3145

AN:  This was requested by an anonymous person!

AN2: Barely edited and never beta-read. Live dangerously, friends.

Beau Simpson operates under extreme stress almost every waking minute of every day.  Career military is difficult enough, but commanding the elite fighter pilots that pass through TOPGUN is like playing the game on expert mode.  There’s so much protocol, so much paperwork.  There’s politicking up the chain of command, but most stressful of all:  there’s trying to balance the mission against the lives of the men and women under his command.

A weaker man would have broken years ago, but Vice Admiral Simpson can bear it.  His job has always been his life—he never married, never had kids, so his work filled up all the space in his life until there wasn’t room for anything else anyway.

Until now.  Until he met you, months and months ago, a date set up by mutual friends that he only agreed to because the question came during a low point of loneliness, right around his birthday when the weight of his solitary years seemed more than he could bear.

The date had been awkward, both of you stilted and out of practice with being sociable.  Beau had been fantasizing about going home, shedding his suit, and cracking open a bottle of scotch when you gave a light laugh and threw your hands up in surrender over the basket of bread sticks.

“Let’s just say this isn’t going anywhere after tonight,” you had said.  “So there’s no pressure to perform and we can just have a nice meal together, okay?”

Such a simple solution.  Beau had smiled at you—his first genuine smile all evening—and agreed.  Yes, this was going nowhere.  Let’s just eat our delicious food and relax.

Except once you both relaxed, no longer under your self-imposed pressure, the date evened out and found its rhythm.  Beau found himself unclenching.  He noticed how your shoulders dropped down from where they had been hoisted up by your ears.  You both relaxed, and by the time the check was being laid down on the table, Beau was enjoying himself.

An awkward first date led to a less awkward second date.  Months and months later, he’s here:  after a long, stressful day at work, he’s slipping the key you gave him into the door, easing himself into your small bungalow home, easing his shoes off and padding back to your bedroom—sometimes his bedroom too; he has a drawer in your dresser and space in your closet.  You’re fast asleep and he doesn’t want to wake you, so he undresses quietly, slips into the bathroom to brush his teeth, and then he slips into bed beside you.

You’re in one of his shirts, a ragged one from his academy days that is faded and stretched along the collar.  It’s long on you, but when Beau pulls back the covers, he can see where it’s rucked up, revealing a pair of white cotton panties that have no business making his mouth run dry, yet they do.

He usually just goes to sleep beside you.  He usually just wakes you enough to let you know he’s there, then holds you until you slip back to sleep.  He usually just buries his nose against your hair, against the back of your neck, takes in the familiar scent of you.  He usually just tugs your lax body to his.  Beau finds comfort in the simple fact of your body—solid, warm, breathing deep and even.  The little sighs you make as you settle against him. 

That’s what he usually does, but not always.  You’ve made certain parameters clear to him.  Certain…allowances.  Beau was uncomfortable with the thought of it at first, but then as he fell more and more in love with you, as he saw the trust you had for him and as his trust for you grew…

You can’t communicate it verbally if you’re asleep.  You communicate it in other ways.

If you’re not open to it any particular night, you wear black or colored panties to bed.  But white panties?  Those mean something else entirely.  That means you’re his completely, however he wants you.  He can wake you up…or he can let you sleep, but you’re his in every sense of the word.

You’re generally a pretty deep sleeper.  Beau has only done this a few times, and it’s the strangest kink he’s discovered yet.  There’s a sense of ownership, of having total control over your body while you sleep, but it all feeds into a deep intimacy, the purest form of trust he’s ever had in a relationship.  It’s purely erotic, entirely hot—he’s already hard, his cock straining against his boxers at just the sight of those white panties molded to the cleft between your legs—but it also makes his throat tight as he stares down at your peaceful, sleeping face. 

Beau kneels over you, and he peels the sheet the rest of the way off of you.  You shift a little at the loss of it, but it’s San Diego—the room is warm, and you switch the AC off at night.  He waits for you to settle again, then he reaches out and touches you.

Everything in Beau’s life is hard.  The politics of his job, the needless red tape, the life-and-death decisions.  Even his loneliness until now has been hard, a heavy thing to bear for so many years, but you—the sudden appearance of you all those months ago—you are soft.  You’re light and warm and kind, but above all, you are soft, and you are soft under his hands as he touches you.  He curls a hand into a loose fist, runs his knuckles over the smooth skin of your thighs, and when he reaches the rucked-up hem of his shirt, he slips his palm underneath.

The softness of your belly, the curve of your waist.  Up to the swell of your breasts, loose in the oversized t-shirt, and Beau cups you there, revels in how perfectly you fit in the palm of his hand.  He runs the pad of his thumb over your nipple, strokes you light as air until you start to pebble against him.  He pinches you lightly, barely any pressure at all, but it’s enough to draw a sigh from you—your lips part in sleep and you sigh, and there’s a hint of a moan behind it.

But you don’t wake.

He climbs off the bed long enough to shed his boxers, then he rejoins you.  He lies beside you, propped up on one arm, and he touches you with more intention with his free hand.  He reaches down and strokes your knees, the rounded tops of your thighs.  He slides his hand like a knife’s blade between your thighs, the softer skin there and far warmer, and then he grasps the curve and heft of your leg before he ghosts his forefinger along the white cotton of your panties.

Beau fixes his gaze on your face as he touches you.  He strokes you between your legs, over and over, feather-light but with enough pressure that he can feel you getting wet from his ministrations.  You don’t wake but your breathing picks up, and Beau can see your eyes moving behind your eyelids, and he thinks you must be dreaming.  He wonders if you’re dreaming of him.

Beau’s dreams before were always stress-dreams related to work:  dreams of being stuck in a runaway car, a runaway plane.  Dreams where his teeth fell out or where he was late for a final exam he never studied for.  He rarely had good dreams, and he almost never had erotic dreams.

After he met you, though?  It was like a switch was thrown in his brain, and now he dreams of little else.  Sometimes they aren’t necessarily sexy—he dreams of you sitting across from him in his office, or he dreams of you in his childhood home.  But they are often erotic dreams—even when he can’t remember the details, he wakes up hard and aching for you.  He wakes with a hunger so soul-deep that if you’re not beside him in that moment, if you’re not within arm’s reach, he feels panicky, like maybe he imagined you, like he dreamed you up, and he can’t quite calm until he hears your voice again or sees you or—best yet—can pull you into his arms.

What are you dreaming now?  How is your mind interpreting the way your body is responding to him?  You grow wet; the white cotton turns translucent as your arousal soaks through it, and Beau hooks a careful finger along the elastic edging and moves it aside.  He parts your folds, shifts his gaze from your face to between your legs.  In the scant bit of light, he can just make out your perfect pussy:  slick and glistening, the swollen bud of your clit. 

He can’t resist it; he leans down and presses a plush kiss to you there, open and searching, and when he laves his tongue along your seam, you breathe out a sleepy, quiet moan.  Beau freezes—he doesn’t pull away, but he doesn’t move.  You don’t wake, though.  You only shift in your sleep, but you part your legs more, you squirm against the mattress before you settle again.

It becomes a game to him:  teasing you, seeing how far he can push the limits of engaging with your body without waking you.  He licks against you, flicks his tongue along your clit.  He pushes one finger, then a second into you, and it always surprises him at how good you feel—the tight confines of your body, snug and warm.  He fingers you so slowly, pushes in until his fingertips brush that spot inside you, pulls them out again.  When you shift or sigh or moan, he stills and waits for you to settle.

When you do, he continues.

It’s a game for him too.  It’s delayed gratification.  Beau is a master at denying himself; most of his life has been spartan, austere.  He’s foregone the usual comforts that most men in his position rely on—he’s never married, and he rarely dated much, but now that he has you, he luxuriates in these moments.  He stretches them out until he reaches the end of his patience.

It takes a while for him to reach his limit now.  He keeps thinking you’ll wake before he breaks, but you’re a deep sleeper and must have been especially tired tonight.  You shift and sigh and moan, but you don’t really start to wake until after Beau carefully climbs on top of you, after he reaches down to grasp his aching cock and line it up with your entrance.  After he starts to push into you, your pussy opening to him like a flower, and he gets halfway inside you before your eyes flutter open and you whimper out the sweetest, most drawn out, “oh.”

Beau never would have thought of this as a kink he’d enjoy, and it took him a while to get past his discomfort, but now?  Oh, he loves this part, you waking up as he enters you, that moment when your face is absolutely without artifice at the sensation of his cock splitting you open.  Your wide eyes gazing up at him without an ounce of fear, just pure love and trust, and tonight you reach up a clumsy hand and cup the side of his face as you breathe out his name.

Beau loves the sound of his name in your mouth.  To everyone else, he’s Vice Admiral or Sir or Cyclone, but to you?  He’s just Beau; he’s just a man without a chest full of medals, no commendations or accolades.  He’s just a man loving you, his woman, so when you draw him down for a kiss, he happily obliges you.

You must taste yourself on his lips and his tongue.  You give a sleepy groan, and then he feels the curve of your smile against his mouth before you whisper, “been having fun without me?”

Beau pushes the last fraction into you, feels the press of your hipbones against his, and when he pulses forward your eyes widen.  You whine at the sensation, and he feels how you clench down against him before you shift underneath him and wrap your legs around the backs of his thighs.

“You were here the whole time,” he whispers back.  He sucks a kiss against your pulse point, laves the mark with his tongue. 

You hum at that, lift your head enough to kiss his collarbone as he braces himself above you.  “Was dreaming about you,” you tell him.  You don’t whisper now, but your voice is husky with sleep. 

“Good dream?”

You nod, kiss him below his earlobe.  “Very good.”

“Remember anything about it?”

You laugh, a little breathless, and one of your hands reaches down to rest lightly on his ass.  “Kinda went like this.”

Beau plays dumb.  He likes to hear you say it; it’s another kink he’s uncovered, hearing dirty talk.  He wants to hear you say the words, the flip side of this game between you—the start where he teases you as you sleep, where he gets as much of his cock inside you before you wake.  Then the end where you use your words.

“Like what, sweetheart?” he asks.

“Like this,” you say, and he starts to move.  He pulls out, pushes back in, feels how your pussy grips him so well as he does.  “Like you…ah, Beau, fuck…like you were fucking me…”  You trail off, whine as his rhythm picks up, long and deep thrusts that make your eyes flutter each time he seats himself deep in your cunt.

“Use your words,” he orders.  “Describe it.”

“Beau…”

“Describe how I fuck you.”

“So good.”  That comes out quick, a babble, but you take a breath and focus.  Your eyes lose their fuck-drunk glaze and focus on him.  “You fuck me so well with your cock.”

“Yeah?”  He buries himself in you and pauses there, pushes his hips forward, pulses into you deeper.  He feels where the base of him grinds against your clit.  “Is that all?”

“N-no.”  You shake your head, refocus.  “God, Beau…you’re perfect.  You have the perfect cock.  So deep I can feel you for days afterwards.  No one has ever been so deep…love waking up to you fucking me.  Never wanna wake up any other way.”

Beau loves this too, the implication that he’s the best you’ve ever had.  He has the barest bit of insecurity here, has been alone for most of his life where you’ve dated other men, and in his idle moments, he wonders if he’s doing right by you.  You’ve assured him time and again that he is doing right by you—he’s wonderful, he’s the best—but he believes you the most here, when you’re half-asleep and pliant as he thrusts into you.

“Please,” you add, and you pull him back down for a kiss.  You mumble against him, “please, Beau.”

He knows what you’re asking for.  He reaches down and maneuvers you, hooks your legs high on his hips first, then slips his arms under them until your legs are on his shoulders.  He folds you damned near in half, and the change in angle affords him even more depth into your cunt, enough to feel the where the tip of him brushes against the mouth of your womb, but the sight is even better.  You folded underneath him in his own academy shirt, still in your white panties that are absolutely ruined by your combined arousal but framing where his thick cock splits you open over and over as he fucks you.  You’re entirely at his mercy—your feet nearly touch the headboard, and your hands grip his biceps, but you are also entirely undone, entirely wanton in the noises you make, the way you beg him to use you, to mark you, to ruin you so that no one else can even come close to how well he fucks you.

He can feel you getting close, can feel you clenching down on him with each punishing thrust.  He’s close too, the tight coil of tension in his gut, in his balls, at the base of his spine ratcheting each time he buries himself in you.  He’s covered in a sheen of sweat, his close-cropped hair is mussed, and he feels his orgasm thundering towards him.

He knows how to get you there a beat before him:  he ends each thrust by pressing against you, by pressing the sparse curls at the base of his cock against your clit and grinding there, and you spit out a “fuck, Beau, please” but you’re already there:  your contorted body trying to arch as the orgasm tears through you, your fingertips biting into his arms, and your lips parting as you wail out his name.

And then a beat later, his own orgasm crackling along his spine, and he pants out his usual question because he needs to hear you say it, so he asks, “where?” and you manage to whimper through your own orgasm as you tell him inside you, to come inside you, that you want to feel him coming inside you, and so he does—he thrusts as deeply as he can and then he stills.  He paints your cervix with his cum, and he feels how your pussy ripples along him to pull it deeper inside you still.

-----

It always takes long moments to extricate himself from you:  to lower your trembling legs from his shoulders, to slip out of you (and your groan of disappointment always makes his cock twitch).  You each clean up, but you leave your ruined panties on as you crawl back into bed, and the thought of his cum nestled inside you always makes Beau feel a pleased sense of possession, as if you’re marked as his.

He pulls you against him, spoons you as you settle into the bed.  “Were you really dreaming about me?” he whispers against the back of your neck, and you laugh lightly.

“Not at first,” you admit.  “I had this dream that I was on an indoor roller coaster.  At a mall, I think?  But then…then I dreamed of you.”

Here, Beau wishes he had a better sense of romance.  He wishes he could say sweet, poetical things without feeling like a fraud.  He’d say I dreamed of you too or something like that, but when he opens his mouth to say it, the words stick in his throat.

Instead, he sighs at his own cowardice—the brave Vice Admiral undone by mere words; he can’t even say the three words that stick in his throat too.  Instead, he sighs and kisses the back of your neck, right along the knob of your spine, and whispers, “sweet dreams, sweetheart.”

[pizzaboat]

Eda Clawthorne and BPD

Eda is a character I never really associated with something like BPD(Borderline Personality Disorder) until I’d done more research on the disorder myself. Initially, I’d had a one size fits all idea in my mind for what a manifestation of BPD could look like.

But after finishing the Owl House in its entirety, and dispelling some of my ignorance around the topic I’ve come to the headcanon that Eda has BPD.

So to start, what I understand about BPD(Borderline Personality Disorder) is that it’s a personality disorder belonging to the cluster B section in the DSM-5.

It’s generally described that people living with it, might engage in risky/self harming behaviour, have an intense fear of abandonment, struggle with addiction, and have unstable/turbulent relationships with others. People with BPD also struggle with an intense feeling of internalised shame and numbness.

BPD usually manifests after some sort of prolonged mental abuse/physical abuse/sexual abuse/ psychological abuse or trauma, and that usually happens in childhood.

Well, what does any of that have to do with Eda? How does her character link in any way to what I've described? Let’s go through it;

(I’m not an expert, this is just a headcanon that I use to look at Eda)

Addiction/Substance Abuse

Eda is implied to be an alcoholic in the show. Apple blood, her infamous favourite drink, is often used as a stand-in or a direct reference to the topic of intoxication or turning to the bottle to cope with big feelings.

Proof of apple blood being an alcohol signal can be when Luz mentions in early S2, that Eda was hard to get off the roof after she drank too much apple blood, implying she became irrational and unreasonable after drinking too much.

Another example is when Eda was seen in a tavern in Eda’s Requiem, she canonically has a large and unpaid tab in that tavern, and was drinking apple blood (from a juice box) while lamenting about the current events of her life.

A scene like that is a heavy reference to the trope of getting drunk and venting to your local bartender that can be seen in a lot of movies and tv-shows.

Eda is also potentially implied to have Depression during the show and is typically grumpy/unapproachable before her first drink, early in the morning.

I’ve headcanons before that Eda uses Apple Blood to self medicate her mood after the implications in season 2 that she is drinking more heavily (the joke about the roof, her chasing free appleblood, drinking in the tavern when she’s sad), and after season1, and during all of season 2 her mental health had taken a clear nose dive after traumatic events and perceived abandonments.

I also mentioned that people with BPD struggle with a feeling of emptiness and numbness, and Eda’s low and irritable mood could be interpreted as coming from a place of feeling hollow. (That’s my headcanon).

Addiction is also considered a risky/self harming behaviour, which leads me to my next point.

Risky/Self Harming behaviours

Eda is an impulsive and risk taking person, that usually contributes to a pretty popular ADHD headcanon for her character, but I’d also like to argue that her risk taking behaviour could also be a sign of BPD, as it typically leads her to dangerous or life threatening situations, often on purpose.

A small example of this is when searching for titan blood, she pushes herself in front of a laser beam and urges King to shoot her with it to trigger her harpy powers. In that episode she was struggling to go harpy mode;

And the episode before that, Knock Knock Knockin’ on Hooty’s Door, she was shown depriving herself of sleep and worrying about not being ready for the day of unity. Eda had proved she was anxious to be ready and willing to hurt herself to be so, stemming from an internal feeling of frustration and worthlessness because she didn’t have what she needed to be ready.

In the cave, I think her action to jump in front of the laser, disguising her actions as a childish and silly request of bone-headedness was her hiding her self-destructive instincts and inner frustration in plain sight.

Her risky behaviours are driven by a deep self hatred and that leads me to her most risky action of all…

Fear of Abandonment

When Eda overhears the kids talking about telling her something, she spirals and assumes the worst. She spends that episode devaluing herself, trying to self-soothe with apple blood, and distancing herself from the kids in response to her assumption that they only have the worst news for her.

Luz is leaving and King wants to live with his dad.

She spends the day living out what appears to be a fantasy with Raine, where she is ‘Mama Eda’ to the younger BATTs members and she and Raine are playfully dancing around each other with some not so subtle flirting. It resembles a family life, where her and Raine are married, or atleast happily together, and the BATTs are like her very own kids that need her.

(it’s key to point out that Raine did most of the heavy flirting and was active, while Eda just bathed herself in the situation. Likely because while it was what she wanted, she’d also expressed earlier in the episode that she felt everyone left her in the end and all good things ended).

When this fanasy/substition falls through and the rebellion is busted, her and Raine play a murder-suicide duet attempt together, where Raine then learns that there’s more to the story than Eda is letting on, and that she isn’t just being motivated to do the heroic thing because she has nothing to lose.

Raine clearly realises Eda is trying to die because she has something to lose, and she assumes she is losing it. Dying to Eda is less painful and scary than being abandoned again.

I mentioned that childhood trauma/abuse can cause BPD to develop, and I’d argue that having a curse that caused the people she loved to leave her because she pushed them away, or because it seemed like her curse made her too monstrous to love, is pretty traumatising.

And that fear of abandonment predates even the curse, as it was revealed in the flashback episode where her and Raine met, that Eda had no friends, was ostracised by her teachers/principle and that she was terrified of being separate from Lilith; her only friend. Eda didn't know what an expulsion would mean for their relationship, if Lilith would still be her best friend, or if Lilith progressed onwards without her, would she abandon Eda?

Well, that worry was validated when it was revealed their sister relationship fell apart sometime between their late teens and mid-forties, when Lilith is introduced as Eda’s rival and Eda’s expression is stormy when she first sees Lilith on screen, it’s laos important to note that Lilith attacked first at the convention with her words, and Eda, having some very stormy feelings about her sister, responds to the greeting by cutting Lilith down in front of young fans in a way she knows will rile up her sister.

She basically attacks Lilith’s mask by mentioning that Lilith peed herself at a convention as a kid, and then proceeds to act childish in Lilith’s presence to wind her up and prove to Lilith that she is no better than Eda and that she’s not changed a bit since they were kids where it counts, according to Lilith.

We don’t know what caused Eda and Lilith to feud like this, but it can be assumed that LIlith joining a coven that allows only two days off a year made Eda feel like she was abandoned by her sister in some of the worst years of her life, by the person she once called her best friend.

The breakdown of such an important relationship would be upsetting to anyone, but to Eda, in the situation she was in, that would have to be further traumatising.

To add to the familial issues, Eda has issues with Gwen.

The entirety of keeping up a-fear-ances was about how gwen had failed both her daughters, but for this post, it’s that Gwen treated the curse, something so integral to Eda and her life at this point, something that Eda cannot change or separate herself from, like something her mom needed to cure her of.

To eradicate. So much so that she disregarded Eda’s bodily autonomy and safety at multiple points in just one episode and caused Eda to snap. She scared Eda into running away as a teenager, and she had to apologise to Eda in that episode for making her daughter feel like she didn’t love her. “I love every part of you.” - to paraphrase what Gwen said.

It’s not hard to imagine that feeling like your own mother would rather risk your health and happiness, disregard your wishes and try to remove an unremovable part of your person, would make you feel more unlovable and broken than you already feel.

I’m sure that this contributed to Eda’s fear of abandonment and would help cultivate the already existing internal shame she feels just for existing next to her loved ones and feeling like she’s not good enough to be in their lives because all she does is hurt them.

Yup, this is setting up my next point…

Shame/Low Sense of Self-Worth

Proof that Eda’s self-worth is low and her inner shame is high comes from how she treats her kids and her father. Eda struggles to look at people she feels she’s let down. While some individuals with BPD might do everything to avoid abandonment, Eda tends to abandon people first and devalues herself in the process, convincing herself she doesn’t deserve to fight for them or be in their company.

Her inner shame mostly stems from how she handles her curse, its impact on her life, and her past relationships. With Luz and King, she initially keeps up a protective wall and avoids physical affection. When she believes they are leaving her, she justifies her suicidal thoughts to Raine by denying her role as their "mother," revealing her deep-seated belief that she's unworthy of such a title.

Despite considering them her children, Eda questions her ability to be a suitable mother figure, expressing doubts about her worthiness. It takes reassurance from Raine for Eda to begin to accept that she is needed and, consequently, good enough.

Her relationship with Dell, though mentioned sparingly, has left lasting scars. Eda blames herself for hurting him and struggles to forgive herself, even when her father asks her to move on from the past.

In Knock Knock-Knocking on Hooty’s Door, Eda implies that she is haunted by nightmares of her breakup with Raine, blaming herself entirely for their breakup. This implied consistent rumination suggests that she feels responsible for every abandonment and rejection she has experienced, exacerbating her inner shame.

Raine was likely the last stable influence in Eda’s life, and her breakup further solidified Eda’s belief that she is the cause of her own abandonment. This cycle of self-blame and perceived rejection has left lasting mental scars, reinforcing Eda’s sense of brokenness and perpetuating her feelings of endless abandonment.

By examining Eda’s behaviour and internal struggles, it becomes evident that her shame and low sense of self-worth are deeply ingrained, shaping her relationships and interactions throughout the series.

Splitting

I can’t really talk about a BPD headcanon without mentioning its most famous feature. Splitting, from what I understand, is when a person's mood, sense of self, or perception of others shifts dramatically in the other direction in response to a threat, stressor, or trigger.

It might not just look like, “I like this person.” “Now I hate this person.” It can manifest as more dynamic, extreme black-and-white thinking, where something is either all or nothing:

“She always does this.”

“He never does that.”

“Things always go wrong.”

“This always goes right.”

The black-and-white thinking can be either positive or negative and can even be about a person's own self. And this is where my headcanon goes a bit shaky, because all I really have to go off of is Eda’s initial attitude of “We weirdos stick together,” and then how she switches those ideals up when she’s devaluing herself and her importance within the relationships she has with friends and family.

This is particularly evident with the kids and her extreme and impulsive suicide attempt, where I get this feeling of “I’m not good enough, and I will never be good enough.” off of her.

She also changes her mood with Lilith very quickly during the season 1 finale. A few minutes ago, she was ready to kill her sister and saw her as the most vile person she’d ever met. The next minute, she is letting her sister back into her house and wanting a relationship with her again after she split the curse.

There is this kind of emotional impermanence where she forgives Lilith and goes straight back to wanting to be friends with her at a speed and level that isn’t common at all. No matter what is done to Eda, she seems to bounce back quickly, no matter how badly she’s hurt in the end.

That's all I've really got for that, to be honest. If I find more that explores this idea better, I will probably make a post about it.

Conclusion

I think that turbulent relationships, a massive fear of abandonment, risky and impulsive behaviours and high shame/low self esteem are key parts of Eda’s character and that’s why I headcanon her to have BPD(borderline personality disorder.)

[aria0fgold]

FINALLY! MY FIRST ALL PERFECT SONG :D

I even got Airi giving me a heart aww! Thanks Airi, I'm celebrating it too!

[bountycancelled]

monster trio + sensitive/angry reader who's pmsing

opla x reader

requested: yes, but reqs are closed right now<3

genre: headcanons, no pronouns used, no use of y/n, reader has periods but gender isn't specified.

a/n: not taking reqs for now since I'm writing my finals and also working on an smau. but I am taking commissions if anyone is interested, totally not a must at all♡ unedited, no caps on purpose, its also a little short, but I hope you enjoy it!

☆luffy☆

–1000/10. brushes off your sour mood with a cheery smile and nothing floating around in his eyes.

if you were hoping that he would act a little more... sensibly during this less bearable part of your cycle, then you're dead wrong. boy is completely clueless.

everytime you lash out at him or otherwise act way more emotionally than you usually do, he genuinely doesn't think anything of it.

if you explain to him that your hormones are the reason for your behaviour, he'll just shrug and carry on as usual.

he doesn't necessarily understand how your body works, but he'll do anything you ask if it means making this time for you better to manage.

cuddling with you when you're in pain, comforting you when you get overly emotionally or giving you space. (this one's really hard for him, not because he can't be away from you, he just keeps forgetting and walking into the room your in to talk to you)

overall, this brown-eyed, straw hat wearing pirate may not be a pms expert, but he'll sure as he'll try his best for you. (no sharing food though, so don't ask.)

☆zoro☆

extremely perceptive, so he notices something is off about you, but shares that same lack of knowledge that luffy has.

he's also not the most emotional or confrontational person, if you want to talk about whatevers bothering you, then you know where to find him. he's not going to actively seek out answers.

he can take you attitude and mood swings like a champ too, so it's only when he overhears you chatting with nami about your period pain kicking your ass that he puts 2 and 2 together.

again, he's not exactly sure how to help you, this isn't a problem he can solve with his swords. so, he offers you the next best thing in his opinion, sleep. and lots of it.

if you're sad, he'll let you cuddle him until you eventually pass out (he's as stiff as a cardboard box when you're wrapped around him, but he's trying, okay?) if you're angry, he'll train with you until you can't get a word out, let alone think pissy thoughts, and you'll both nap on the closest comfy surface.

he always falls asleep before you tbh, buuuuuut. he always wakes up before you, still as he can be, making sure that you don't stir in your sleep, seeing as it's one of your only respites to the highs and lows of highschool footba– I mean, of your hormones. its not much, but he hopes that his presence serves as a comfort to you.

☆sanji☆

out of the three, he's the most likely to be hurt by your change in behaviour.

knowing sanji, he probably thinks that he's done something to encite your sudden moods and he'll seek you our immediately to apologise for whatever he's done that's made you act like this.

when you explain to him the actual situation, he calms down for a split second because now he knows he hasn't done anything to upset you, and then immediately goes into caring partner mode.

although he prides himself on knowing women better than most men, he's a bit clueless in this regard. but, if there's one thing he truly does know the ins and out of, it's you. your likes, dislikes, dreams, pet peeves, he'll pull out all the stops, each and every single action of his that you've ever talked about in a positive manner, he'll do.

I'm talking cuddles, compliments, cooking meals for you odd hours of the night when you're craving something specific, he'll do it all, if it means making this a little easier for you to deal with.

and though it pains him deeply to be away from you for any reason, he's grateful that you distance yourself whenever you're a bit snappy. he's sensitive by nature, and he'll come sprinting to you once you've cooled off a bit, ready to smother you with love once again.

[tofu83]

Lottery To Upgrade 3

Knowledge bank

Sebastian was a genius and a university professor, proficient not only in history but also in biology. His academic status is admired and his teaching is loved by students. Because being obedient to Masters in his capacity helps maintain social stability and makes humans more willing to be dominated by aliens, he is also exempted from participating in the lottery.

But he actually secretly excavated the history erased by Masters and studied the physiological functions of alien creatures, hoping to find a way to fight back against Masters, free mankind from the fate of slavery, and regain freedom.

"I seem to have found it! The weakness of these bastards is actually..." His excitement lasted less than three seconds because the door of his secret laboratory was destroyed.

"Professor Sebastian, you have been accused of illegally spying on Master's secrets, and you must immediately participate in the lottery! In order to thank you for your contribution to society, the winning rate is 100%!" The leader of the hunter bot pronounced his fate.

"No! It's just one step away from success!" He tried to escape, but was soon subdued by a hunter bot and injected with a mysterious liquid and passed out.

"Expert bot-SN001 active, ready to serve and advise" the newest humanoid robot woke up and stand at attention. Its appearance was half human half machine, smooth and muscular, wearing nothing but a pair of briefs.

"Oh My God! Professor Sebastian? Is it you?" a young scientist who was Sebastian’s student could not believe what he saw.

"It is Expert Bot-SN001. Professor Sebastian is ceased to exist but his personality is stored in database. Do you prefer this bot simulate his personality?"

"Oh yes!"

"Confirmed." The robot nodded and asked, "what’s the question?" in Sebastian’s tone.

"It’s really you! What happened to you?"

"I volunteer to become the first expert bot. This kind of robots stored the most amount of information about our Masters. It’s mission is to make humans understand Masters better, so that they can be more reverent and obedient to Masters. It is the most advanced non-combat robot."

"I don’t understand. Why such a successful person like you would like to be converted?"

"I tried to explore a method to destroy Masters’ rule but failed. Thanks to Masters for keeping me alive and instilled all knowledge of Masters in my mind. Therefore I understand that human have no chance to win the war against Masters. Masters are much more powerful and advanced than us. I'm stupid but I can be saved, as long as I become a robot and spread the master's knowledge and disintegrate the human resistance consciousness."

"So you wanted to resist Masters and you know the weaknesses of Masters now?"

"Warning!" Sebastian became Robot mode again and said "Inappropriate questions are detected and education is required immediately"

"Wait! I just…" But the young scientist couldn’t finish the sentence. In front of him, the robot became completely naked and on its crotch was a phallus shaped hypno-gun emitting beam to the young man’s head.

Moments later, the young man snapped to attention and said out loud, "I understand! Masters are great. I obey Masters’ rule without question!"

The Expert bot-SN001 made its groin area cover in briefs, and asked again, "any more questions?"

"No, sir! All I should know is Masters are great. I will convert more men to robots for Masters. Thank you, sir. Have a nice day!"

"Have a nice day, too!" While seeing the young man leaving, Expert bot-SN001 experienced a long time of pleasure, it knew it served Masters well and was glad that it could be an obedient robot forever.