#its almost 12 am but i was inspired lol

[etheravenlivrenvari]

here @broosepayne have some batblobs!

[imaginesbymk]

*that tiktok sound* hey!!….. hey…….. how y’all doing………..

i have a lot to say but lemme start off by saying i am SOOOOOooOoOoO sorry for ghosting this blog for a year. same thing’s been happening with wattpad. i ghosted 2 fics on there. and that includes my original dystopian scifi novel that has been in self development hell (as i like to call it)

my only explanation is that i grew unmotivated and grew out of writing fics. it came to a point where im just maladaptive daydreaming, the maladaptive daydreaming takes over and it doesnt let me actually create anything. the other reason is timing. i worked my ass off and finally graduated college with a 4.0 GPA, i did more commercial modelling and runway for a university fashion show so i can build my portfolio, i work full time and my pay is big, i made more art in my sketchbook... basically i just lived my life outside of tumblr.

another thing, the giant elephant in the room, i met cameron monaghan and morena baccarin at fanexpo canada! cameron went through my sketchbook, signed my jerome/jeremiah fanart, and asked me if i was an art student. after i told him i was rejected twice, he looked through every single page in my sketchbook and told me, "aw. well, fuck 'em!" that "it looks like [you] don't need art school" after all. he saw my reservoir dogs acrylic portraits of mr. pink and mr. white and told me he used to watch that film almost 600-700 times when he was 12. he then took a pic of my Grace Van Dien fanart (when i met her in 2022 at fanexpo canada) and he told me he's gonna send it to her. i had no idea they even knew each other.

i couldn't afford a table selfie+autograph combo at morena's autograph sessions so i only paid for a selfie. i said "oi" and "obrigada" to morena before and after taking a selfie with her and she said thank you back with a big smile :D so fanexpo was surreal.

i've always wanted to meet cameron monaghan and after years of writing fanfic for jerome and jeremiah valeska and other gotham fandom character imagines, i *finally* got to meet him.

ive been thinking about coming back and writing again, not just tumblr but on wattpad and getting serious with my original scifi dystopian novel. there's so much that i wanna do in life other than become financially stable and become a successful petite model until i no longer look the part. its hard for me to write because i get so easily stumped. even when i create some ambiance and rewatch the fandom to get inspired, it just drops again. writing is hard. that is why i have respect for my mutuals and my favourite famous authors that got me to write when i was 12. (lol) and anyways, i made new friends and im the happiest ive ever been romantically that i dont need to *imagine* anything with a fandom character, i do it for those who imagine it themselves!

im so sad to come back here and see that a few of my mutuals are inactive or have deactivated. and i became like them and abandoned my work. to be fair, my writing isn't that good, and it still isn't, and if i get something written and published here or on wattpad on a professional hardcopy of my book, i won't believe that it's my best work - and i aced my creative writing elective in my program, so that's a bummer.

i think meeting cameron is giving me a nudge to get back to writing. it feels weird wanting to write jerome/jeremiah fanfic after interacting with the actor himself for less than 5mins of his time, and that he's a human being that experiences human stuff like we all do, the only difference is that he's famous. im not sure if it healed my parasocial mindset with my fave celebs. i do want to take my time and write *something*. i am not doing the requests that have been in my drafts and inbox for a year (sorry :O) im just gonna take my time and readjust and get something down.

<3 mad love to my mutuals @myriadimagines @spacetalbot @arrogant-sonofa-bitch @littlemissvincentvega @emcon-imagines @writerdream22 @jjsmaybank20 @witchthewriter @musicallisto @locke-writes @zodiyack @mahvericks @karasong @moonlit-imagines @randomfandomimagine + many more moots

[dansevilpianotea]

ramble ahead about time, tatinof, 2015 and changing one's life

tatinof is very special and im so happy they did this video to acknowledge that its not cringe at all and that theyre proud of their past selves !! there's sth genuinely healing about that !! ive had a hard time in 2015 and even tho i was 12/13 and just discovered that online fan communities of things i was into were a thing and was nowhere close to the phandom (i joined after BIG), this is the fandom internet that i joined back then. thats why its so poetic that they sing 'the internet is here', because to me this is the time it started to be there for me. it wasnt always kind to me and instagram was not a great platform to start on if your bullies and other ppl from school were also on it, but it was also when for the first time ever i realised that there were not only people who liked what i liked but that those ppl also have created their own culture and community online !! i was not totally alone !! there is a life outside of school !! i would never chose to go back to that time ever like it was horrible (that applies to any time in the past tho, i hate the idea of 'going back in time' with a passion) but im glad that the internet was there for me because no one else really was if im being real with you.

more below the cut because im an insufferable yapper (dan is a terrible influence haha tit joke)

this all is maybe why i find it hard to go back to watch dnps older content and also the stuff from the tatinof era. dan's sarcastic self-hating persona and phils innocent nerd persona are both hitting a bit too close to home and i want to both cry for them and for myself. we knew nothing back then. we were lost and yet did sth we were proud of. yet here we are almost 10 years later and how the fuck did we end up here but oh my god im so proud of us. all it took for me was to watch dan's coming out video. all it took for them was to be embraced and loved by their audience (us). dan also needed a break which is something that at the time it happend was really hard for me but then i found my wonderful lovely phannie discord friends here. we really all got here together and if i ever see any single person say that dnp hate us or dan hates it or that dnp are cringe or that we are cringe etc etc i will block you so hard because what are you even doing bringing up drama when in reality dan and phil and the phandom have developed the most remarkable symbiotic relationship between artist adn fans ever. they are our dads and i honestly just want to say how fucking proud i am of them for how far theyve come and what theyve done since 2015. dan really did the whole mental health and gay thing but then he did the mental health again!! and i think ywgttn and wad need to be given more credit here because idk if you remember pre-wad dan but he wasnt anything like post wad dan. every since wad he seems so happy and genuinely authetic and in peace. (im ignoring dystopia daily here because that was filmed before wad and his dd persona also reminds me too much of 2015 depressed dan than whatever high concept he was going for lol, im just not a dd fan). like wad changed his relationship with us and its warming my entire heart when i see dan smile so much now. he deserves to be happy and proud. and if dan deserved it after going through so much and coming out on top (literally), then i deserve it too. and phil? i love how he's just so confident now. fuck. (literally). he is not the innocent nerd anymore like he actually is fully really himself now and feels comfortable in his body (crop top, phlonde, etc) and openly expressing his sexuality ! even compare this phil to phil from the beginning of the hiatus!! he got so much more confident and relaxed since then!! like fully, really, if he can do it, if he can strip himself of the persona that ppl have attributed to him because of his anxiety, then i can do that too. im so proud of phil. he is an inspiration and the more he's being himself publically with no shame, the more an autistic phannie will feel hopeful for their future. im so proud of both of them.

like its crazy you go through your life thinking you're going nowhere and never making any progress and will never reach your goals but then you stop and look back what you were like 6 months ago and realise how many lives you have lived since then. it always goes back to BIG when dan said this:

[...] I thought I was trapped in a situation forever when in reality, the entire world I lived in and my life changed completely. I thought it was hopeless when in reality there was so much to hope for and that's it. Time changes everything. With the lives that we have, we can try anything we've dreamed of. I want anyone that's ever felt like this to realize you are never trapped. There is always hope. You just need to believe in yourself and get to the other side.

this everyone, changed my life. and i will never be able to thank dan enough for it, no matter how much i pay for tour tickets, how often i watch their videos or share my love for them on here. i just want to mention this because its never just 'light entertainment', it means the world to many of us and we have build a wonderful and loving community despite the hardships of the past and pointless discourses of the present. like, we can change shit for ourselves because we see these gay idiots do it who have done soooo fucking much in the last 15 years like they were on radio 1 and on a hollywood billboard and hosted various big big events. and yet, they decided they want to use their time to do things for themselves and their community. they have said many times that they havent made a profit from (parts of) their tours but they do it regardless. they do really love us and i dont think ive ever really felt loved by people who i was in a fandom for like that. its really not as parasocial as it might seem anymore. we got here together and we should be proud of that. i love dnp and i love you phannies so much !! 💕💕💕💕💕

[ar-feyniel]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by dear @luthien-under-bough

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

52

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

878,730. That's insane actually now that I think about it.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

HOTD/ASOIAF, but also dabbling into "The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue"

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Maternal love - Aemma-centric time-travel fix-it

Armistice - slow-burn(ish), enemies-to-lovers epic fic with human sacrifice and a lot of denial of feelings. And magic!

daughter's wrath - early marriage Daemyra, basically a "what if Rhaenyra married Daemon once her father's marriage to Alicent is announced". Brat!Nyra to its fullest.

Violet-Eyed Jealousy - my biggest claim to fame, the thing that started daddy-in-law agenda, canonverse.

Passion driven - my very first attempt at writing for this fandom and in English overall, the whole fic is shorter than some of my current one-shots lol, but it still hangs strong in top-5.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! Unless they are mean, obnoxious or demanding.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably you took everything from me because it's Daemma, canonverse, and they are doomed lol.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Tbh almost all my fics end with "they fuck and are happy", it's hard to pick just one.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I do, occasionally, and sometimes it upsets me, sometimes I just block and move on.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Mostly F/M, but also F/F and Multi. Haven't written any M/M yet, and as for kinks - well, I don't think I have any hard-nos at this point haha

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

counting tides is technically a crossover because it's heavily based on "The Odyssey" and is adapted to ASOIAF setting.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes, unfortunately.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, without my permission lol. I made the mods take it down.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I plan to! With an author who I consider to be a dear friend of mine. <3

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Daemyra - and if we talk about other fandoms, I have my preferences, but Daemyra is *the* brainrot.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

the poison in my blood has your name. This fic was plagiarised and I have no idea whether I will come back to it.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Characterisation, probably? I also like to believe my premises are creative.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Consistency, that's easy haha. My creativity and inspiration are too fickle.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't see the point. Whenever I encounter High Valyrian or any other language I don't speak in a fic, I just skip this part and never bother with looking for translation.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The Silmarillion.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

maybe this thing was a masterpiece ('til you tore it all up) - it's an angsty modern AU that is probably my best writing ever. I cried when writing it, and every time I reread it, there is a knot in my chest. This is something I am really proud of.

no pressure tags @calenlily @grandlovescheme @awfullylongtime

[lil-oreo-crumbles]

Care to discuss Zarina?

HELL YEAH she’s my GIRLLL 👑

Princess Zarina Kardona of Septarsis, second hatched child of the former (now passed) Rulers of Septarsis, and unofficial second in charge of Septarsis after her older brother, the legendary Seth of Septarsis.

Gonna try and keep this brief-ish (this is not brief omfg I’m sorry this is so long)

Zarina spent all of her early childhood in Septarsis. She never travelled outside of it. Septarsis was all she ever knew.

Just like her brother, she’s seen the extent of the horrors of Mewmankind. She too was stolen from Septarsis and taken to the same place Seth was where they were both put under the worst circumstances for 89 years. (I’m intentionally being vague on the details of this)

Seth feels personally responsible to take care of his sister since he was 15 years older than her. Around the time they were taken there was a notable mental age difference (Zarina was 35 and Seth was 50, making them in Septarian aging the equivalent to 8 and 12 respectively), and even if the gap has been closed and they’re both basically the same mental age, he still carries with him that responsibility, even if she can take care of herself now.

^^^“Just don’t leave me alone wondering where you are” “I am stronger than you give me credit for”

Zarina in her current form had no chance to actually blossom until after those 89 years. She realized her identity and gave herself a new name in the middle of those 89 years, but due to their situation she was hard pressed to do anything about her physical appearance :(

Seth is endlessly supportive of his sister’s new name and her transition. He loves her to death.

She and Seth worked as a team (with the help of the other captured monster kids) to get out of their situation and eventually made it back to Septarsis, and she sobbed at the sight of her homeland in its dark age.

Because of the atrocities they both were subjected to, both Seth and Zarina have a close, almost unbreakable bond. Yes, they quarrel all the damn time and get on each other’s nerves, but they rarely keep anything from each other. If one of them did, let’s say the other would be crushed.

In situations where the siblings work together for a cause, Seth is the outspoken one who inspires crowds of people and gets everyone hyped. He can command an audience and be charismatic and win people over. Zarina, however, is a lot more introverted. She cares a lot more about interpersonal relationships. She’s the type to privately talk to people, ease their fears, and inspire hope individually. Seth will speak to the crowd, Zarina will speak to the person.

In those same situations they both work together on strategy, both offering their own unique perspectives but ultimately finding compromises.

Zarina was the one to give the final blow that killed the man who not only took over Septarsis and put their civilization into its dark age, but also orchestrated the murder of their parents. It was liberating.

Despite her calm, reserved, formal, and polite exterior, if you dare get on her bad side/make her angry she can get so much more threatening and violent than her brother. You do not want to piss this woman off.

Zarina is, to put it bluntly, sheltered as all hell to anything outside Septarsis and those 89 years. This makes her incredibly socially awkward. She carries with her a sense of grace and formality as the Princess of Septarsis, but that’s mainly because she doesn’t speak in front of people too much. If she’s confronted about anything she’ll freeze up and mutter something if she doesn’t know or otherwise. (This is why Seth was the chosen leader lol). Plus she’s also very introverted so she just prefers being alone or with a few close people in general.

Zarina is also, notoriously, a horrible liar. She may be able to keep a secret but finds it difficult to lie when confronted. This ties back to her social awkwardness. She could not lie to save her life, it’d be written all over her face.

She was the first person to actually hear Mylanie out about her peace ideology. She asked Mylanie privately to discuss her ideas. She put aside her own biases and experiences to listen deeply and intently to what Mylanie was trying to do, being one of the first people to realize how honest and earnest she really was about this whole thing. Zarina convinced Seth to hear her out too, sparking the friendship and bond between the three of them.

Zarina, despite her past, gains a nuanced opinion about the Mewman situation. This is when she withdrawals from firmly siding with her brother to something in the middle between him and Mylanie.

Zarina finds herself as the awkward middleman between her extroverted pessimistic brother and their extroverted optimistic friend, Mylanie, as the introverted realist who calms them down when things gets too heated. She’s kind of like the referee which I think is hilarious

Mylanie was the one to finally coax Zarina out of her shell, opening her mind to the various cultures amoungst the different Monsters and even Mewmans. Seth was a lot more well travelled as the Supreme Lord, so Mylanie got to be her personal guide to the outside world.

Being around Seth and Mylanie for so long finally influenced her to be more outspoken and develop her skills in leadership and delegation. They inspire her.

She hates the whole courting thing because she knows it disrespects Mylanie’s boundaries. She always angrily tells Seth to quit it.

Like Seth, Zarina similarly loves Torrence (aka Toffee) very much. She isn’t as outwardly affectionate because of how reserved she is, but shows her appreciation in little ways that mean a lot (she basically allows him free access to the Septarian library, for example)

When Mylanie passed away, just like Seth and Toffee, she was devastated. Seth avoided confronting his grief by piling himself into the war effort and Toffee had Eclipsa to lift his spirits, but Zarina had basically no one. She was alone in her grief and fell back into the cycle of isolation.

The first time she stepped outside after Mylanie’s passing was when she confronted Eclipsa and lost her arm. Rasticore created a prototype robotic arm (that was later improved by an actual engineer…) for her to use as a prosthetic that she greatly appreciates. And because of this Seth doesn’t let her go anywhere without a soldier by her side.

Zarina and her nephew are very close.

Zarina, unlike Seth, really values people’s boundaries. With that being said, she doesn’t put any extra pressure on Toffee after she and Seth take him in and leaves him be for the most part, but is always there with open arms if he needs her. She never refers to Toffee in any familial way— she knows how he responds to that *cough*Seth calling him son*cough*— even if he’s the closest thing to a son she’s ever had. She loves him with everything she has, but he’d never guess it since she rarely feels like she can express it.

Toffee’s bad boy phase gave her grey hairs she lost her temper with his attitude and cockiness so much.

Zarina offered to go as the representative for Septarsis when Comet sent out the banquet invitation before Toffee offered.

After the Comet situation and Toffee and Seth’s fight, Zarina tried to talk to him one on one. However, Toffee was far too angry that the two of them ended up having their own quarrel before he left.

I’ve alluded to this, but Zarina and Seth were both devastated when news of Toffee’s death finally reached them. Zarina uncharacteristically acted impulsively and wanted to send out the army to give Moon and Star a taste of real Septarian aggression for murdering one of their most prominent figures. Seth, on the other hand, despite being just as furious, had to seriously talk her down and explain that it’s not smart to rush into things and waste Septarsis’s resources. It took everything in her power to not take action against the Butterflies, but did back down.

I feel like there may be this underlying inferred inferiority complex, because of how well known Seth is and all of his accomplishments, but I wanna make it known that Zarina holds no animosity towards him. Sure, she’s a bit disappointed that no one really knows who she is, but also simultaneously relieved. Again, she’s not the outspoken type, so it works in her favor if she can chill in the shadows.

Sometimes though people do mistake her for Seth’s wife which… makes both of them fly off the handle with vocal disgust for fairly obvious reasons. That’s the hard part about not being known, but she manages.

WOWOWOW I loved talking about my girl Zarina she’s so fun I love her.

[fuckfuckgoback]

paracosm dashboard simulator

Inspired by @maddgical-boy :D

🌃 justice385627 Follow

Repeat offender caught west of main. Subject has short brown hair, brown eyes, and was known for pickpocketing. Confiscated goods are pending return.

🤺 bcbd-group Follow

caught west of main

thats our area you fucking leeches what the hell

🫐 orions-belt Follow

We actually ran into them in the mid city, and chased them all the way over. 😅

🌃 justice385627

And we wouldn't have had to if any of you could do your jobs.

73 notes

🕶️ monsterfucker378 Follow

something about that slime guy from last week... c'mon police just let me visit i could fix him

17,084 notes

🌃 justice385627 Follow

In reference to the reblog below this: Let him figure it out on his own.

🪨 scumoftheearth Follow

girl he's been posting pics of baggy Ts with khaki shorts please let me intervene

🌃 justice385627

K told me to reply "It's a canon event" and you know I'm not a girl?

#confusion aside it hurts me as well but he has to start somewhere

340 notes

🫐 orions-belt Follow

does anyone have any fashion advice

🫐 orions-belt

like, how it works?

🫐 orions-belt

where do people buy clothes...?

6 notes

powers-kill-deactivated20360709

This attack on our city cannot go ignored. The public should not fear humanoid monsters or people creating electricity to destroy and steal from our community stores. It is revolting.

Possessing powers at all makes these individuals inherently dangerous, but we should not ever see them used to their extreme like this. Action must be taken.

🕷️ gayspiderlover Follow

oh to be able to summon lightning and take down capitalism with my spidergirl girlfriend

powers-kill-deactivated20360709

These people are causing real chaos and destruction. You are sick for joking about this.

🕷️ gayspiderlover

😚🏳️‍🌈🕷️

mwah

#happy six year anniversary to this post #and the attack ig #i hope theyre still together

58,341 notes

💁‍♀️ gender-fucked-nbee Follow

"his pronouns are she/her!" - E probably

🌃 justice385627 Follow

What? I am well aware tack uses she/her pronouns.

🫐 orions-belt Follow

It's a joke, it's based off a different meme, I think they're just saying you'd say something like that.

🌃 justice385627

This site is a waste of time.

35 notes

🥼 ethical-lesbian-crimes Follow

been experimenting with making small bombs recently and i put one in my bag and almost brought it home on accident. if my little sister had found that....

john-deactivated20420312

what is it with these fake self proclaimed "vigilante crime fighters" nowadays trying to be so cool? we know you don't make bombs, quit stroking your ego

🥼 ethical-lesbian-crimes

hey.

673 notes

coquette-n-cute-deactivated20411230

if you have any of the slots on your ci ring set to anything fancy unfollow me immediately. its frankly quite rude to switch into that in front of your friends who can't afford something so expensive

tumblruser-deactivated20420214

a ci ring is $6000??????

iiiiidiots-deactivated20420123

LMAO imagine complaining about not affording a suit yet owning the rich person identity stealer 2000

#everyone here died 💀 #anyway its super easy to make knockoffs

37,064 notes

💕 fangirl-hours Follow

whoes that new guy with the blue hair? I think hes been running around with the team down by the bottom of the hills? vigilante fans help me out here!

🫐 orions-belt Follow

thats me actually! I am newer around here but I'm with E's group. my hair might stand out a little too much lol

💕 fangirl-hours

OMG. uh hiiiiiiiii. youre very cool I love when you do stuff with uhh gravity. wanna hang out sometime?

🫐 orions-belt

uh, E doesn't really want us meeting up with anyone outside the group in our secret identities. so probably not.

💕 fangirl-hours

oh well can we still dm?

💕 fangirl-hours

hello?

12 notes

💁‍♀️ gender-fucked-nbee Follow

🪨 scumoftheearth Follow

definitely left

💁‍♀️ gender-fucked-nbee

poll canceled everyone my partner is here 🥰

🌑 night-fight Follow

doesn't your blog say you're aroace?

🪨 scumoftheearth

yeah and it also says that im in a qpr with them so whats your fucking problem

#do people on this site not read?

203 notes

📌 tack---- Follow

#gaming

2,078 notes

[mistysharks]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @hilarychuff thank you! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

11! For now:)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

75,643

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Stranger Things for now! I would love to branch out but the hyperfocus does what it wants and I am just along for the ride!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I'm Stupid (Do Me) Steddie/M/Getting together/first time (first one I wrote of them!)

All you have is your fire (and the place you need to reach) Hellcheerington/E/Sex Pollen

Five times Steve Walked in on Eddie and Chrissy (And one time they walked in on him) Hellcheer + Hellcheerington Pre-slash/M/Accidental Voyeurism

5 times Steve absolutely didn't have a bisexual meltdown (and one time he did) Hellcheer + Hellcheerington/M/Getting together

Some lonely night we can get together (and I'm gonna tie your wrists with leather) E/Hellcheerington/ final part of my Vampire Eddie and Chrissy series!

(I need to start doing shorter titles :') )

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! Almost always, though it might take me a while! I always appreciate them all <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ok so honestly? I don't do angst much haha, and literally never sad endings. Its all gonna be tied up with a neat little happy bow from me, baby! I think I left chapter 3 of Bardic Inspiration in a pretty sad state - does that count?

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Orgasms cout, right? ;D Right now what comes to mind though is the only fix-it fic I've really written - (I only need) the working of my hands Where I give Hellcheer the happy, sexy ending they deserve (but make it Sapphic with a side of coming back wrong)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet! Fingers crossed it remains that way! I usually try and stay miles away from any fandom drama tbh

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I am determined to! Like sure I would call some of what I've already written smut but I feel like I'm not quite fully there yet. I haven't fully realised the lengths of perversion/intimacy hyperfixation that sits in my mind! Its an ongoing process hehe

Regarding what flavour of smut I write, its always queer, soft, and a little gothic in the undertones... Would love to do some more genderqueer stuff in the future as well

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet! I'm not against them, and I loove a good AU, but nothing has stuck so far. Maybe one day I'll write that Stranger Things Persona 4 AU. (look it would work so well!! Eddie as Kanji makes me feral ngl)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I love that that is a thing people do <3

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but that would be super fun! I tried RP once couldn't get into it:( Sharing ideas and bouncing plot points is always fun though:)

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Thats too hard! I'm just gonna do a current top 5 lol 1. Steddie 2. Hellcheerington 3. Hellcheer 4. Lan Zhan/Wei Ying (Untamed) 5. Kanji/Naoto(P4)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I have 2 unpublished, lengthy chapters of a Steddie pirate AU that I love but I really don't know how to keep going with :(

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm pretty proud of how I set the mood of a scene - the colours, the light, the sounds... just hinting at a feeling without describing the feeling itself.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I can like, either do super dialogue heavy bits, or really descriptive bits, and its so hard to marry the two together!! ahh!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Look english is hard enough lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry potter haha, wrote some truly terrible angsty self-insert when i was 14 (luckily that is gone forever!!)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Honestly, I really love When I am done, its such a snap-shot kind of fic, and its got such a mood that I love. Keeping a one-shot simple and to the point is really difficult, and I think this one is my best attempt at it.

Thanks for tagging me as always, Hil! I'm tagging whoever reads this hehe - if you made it this far you should totally do it too (these are fun!)

[anistarrose]

20 questions for fic writers, tagged by @holdmecloser-gandydancer (thanks reese!) tagging @fexalted @3hobbitsinatrenchcoat @novantinuum and anyone else who wants to!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

86, very soon to be 87!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

397,102. my god.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The majority (over half) of my total fics on AO3 are Gravity Falls, but my current passion right now is obviously TAZ Balance, which is a pretty close runner-up. TOH is a lot further behind, but I have at least one WIP I want to finish up early next year!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Some Sunny Day (Gravity Falls), Tulip's Return (Infinity Train), Stan and Ford Vs. The Future (GF), Fateful Detours (GF/IT crossover), Missteps and Miscommunication (GF).

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Usually, and especially when they give me a chance to infodump about the writing process! I just don't necessarily respond quickly lol

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

In recent memory, it might be but the strange lights in the sky were shining (TAZ). I write more happy/bittersweet endings than sad ones, but that one... that one has one of my absolute favorite twists :)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

to eat from a poisoned plate (TAZ) is one that I almost didn't write a happy ending for, but I'm so glad that I did, because I go back and reread that one a lot, admittedly.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Usually no more than annoying but generic "please update" comments, but back in the Gravity Falls fandom, there was this one person that you've probably heard of/encountered if you wrote a lot about Bill Cipher back in the day.

They were a guest account user who'd get so mad if you killed off Bill, to the point of making threats (albeit exaggerated, not really realistic ones), and also one time they told me I should go read a particular MLP fic and take inspiration from it in my own. Which, no shade against MLP, but as someone who's never been in that fandom, that's literally the funniest entitled comment I've received in my life.

9. Do you write smut?

Nope, but I do occasionally write characters being horny. There's a huge difference between those things for me, and that probably has everything to do with where I lie on the ace spectrum lmao

10. Do you write crossovers?

A couple times, though I used to be way more into them than I am now. There was the aforementioned GF/Infinity Train one, and my gateway into writing TAZ fic was actually a very silly "what if the Pines family were the protags of TAZ Balance" fic.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and fingers crossed it doesn't happen 🤞

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a few times! My buddy @yourbonesarenowmycoat translated several of my Gravity Falls fics into Spanish back in the day, for one thing!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

This should come as no surprise but it's Blupjeans forever and ever <3

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh, god. Probably the one that I wrote like 9 chapters (out of 10 planned ones) to cope with being chronically ill and to convince myself to go to therapy, and then abruptly stopped writing when it was almost done because I figured out how to manage my chronic illness and soon after, started going to therapy. On the one hand, it would be tragic for it to never see the light of day, but on the other hand, it kinda... served its purpose for me already?

16. What are your writing strengths?

Fic as character study! Sometimes I set out with the goal of elucidating a particular theme or character motivation, and sometimes it just happens along the way, but I am a genius with regards to character analysis and my brain is galaxy and I'm not afraid to share it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue is one thing for sure, I get a lot of compliments on it but it's also such a challenge for me. Possibly because I, personally, don't talk like a remotely normal human person irl. The other thing is brevity and killing my darlings — I literally can't count the number of times one of my fics exceeded the expected word count by orders of magnitude.

The aforementioned character study thing? Yeah, that's also a weakness, because a lot of my fics (even including some very, very long ones!) exist to explore themes I couldn't figure out how to word in a simple headcanon post. In fact, I'm probably gonna post a fic of that exact variety this weekend, lmao.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Definitely not fluent enough in any language to do it on any larger scale, unless I get serious about learning Spanish again.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Not on AO3, but in general, it was definitely Pokémon! I was writing time travel stories set in Sinnoh before Legends Arceus made it cool.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

As previously mentioned... probably "to eat from a poisoned plate". In the vaguest possible terms, learning to love cooking again in spite of some prior bad experiences has been a struggle for me, too, and I truly think that without having written that fic, I wouldn't be succeeding.

On a related note, I'm about to spend my afternoon making a blueberry pie.

[jackalope-with-a-pen]

ok hi! pinned post time, since I'm finally using this blog a bit!

I'm Jack (or JT, or Jackalope) and I've been writing for most of my life but I really haven't shared much yet. hoping to change that soon, though! hence this blog. :]

I have WAY too many ideas and WIPs to list 'em all, but here are a few of the writing projects I am currently focusing on...

A Tale Of Two Spies (And Some Other People) (Many Of Whom Are Also Spies)

...or ATOTS(ASOP)(MOWAAS) for short, lmao. It's the first fanfic I ever started writing; I was lowkey too intimidated to try writing fanfic for a long time, but this idea sank its teeth into me and I had to give it a shot. It's an alternate version of the Tin Can Brothers' epic musical Spies Are Forever. I've been working on it for a good while now and it has ballooned into quite a massive undertaking because I am... deranged. <3

Part one, The World's Greatest Spies, is a prequel. It will cover the span of time & our favorite agents' changing relationship from their first meeting to the beginning of the musical. I have MOST of it outlined, and I'm really having a lot of fun with it!!!

111 Waylon

Another fanfic, but this one is for Starkid's Hatchetfield universe! It's heavily inspired by I The Mighty's song "111 Winchester."

111 Waylon is just about fully outlined with 12 chapters, and it will be much shorter and quicker to write than ATOTS, lol. I'm actually going to start writing the first draft very soon! (like... tomorrow. 👁)

This story is about the night some of the popular teens from Hatchetfield High decided to hang out at an old creepy house that definitely isn't haunted and definitely isn't dangerous. Everything is gonna be fine, no need to worry. <3

The Necromancer & The Musician

This is an original work! It also doesn't have a real title yet, even though I've been working on it for almost a year lmao. help. I've done SO MUCH worldbuilding, including designing an entire glyph alphabet for my sneaky secretive necromancers to write all their sneaky secrets in, and I've been having an absolute blast with it all.

The characters in this story mean the world to me, especially the two leads: Zadock Severine (the antisocial necromancer who is Perfectly Content with their life as it is, thankyouverymuch) and Everett Flair (the overly friendly musician who likes to wander and is always on the look for his next fun experience). The two are brought together through the meddling of the nosy god Death (who gave Zadock their magic and is a little too invested in their social life) and become unlikely traveling companions. Oh, and they're both trans and aromantic. 😎

If you'd like to know more about my stories, feel free to send me some asks about 'em!

No guarantees I'll answer every question (gotta keep some things to myself! 😘) but I'd love to share what I can.

[loveoaths]

writing log: 2021 + 2022

a recent conversation with a good friend made me realize: holy shit, i struggle to acknowledge my accomplishments, especially the creative ones. so i decided to start doing a yearly writing recap to log what work i've done, contextualize the environment i did that work in, and take a moment to just sit back and appreciate how i spent my year. this is the first time i'm doing this, so i'll be combining 2021 and 2022.

in 2021, i...

...got headfucked by illness, but kept writing.

this is not one of those "inspirational disability" things. long covid is the worst thing that's ever happened to me, physically and mentally, and that's saying something. i spent a solid two months not being able to walk, let alone think, and it took three more months for me to be able to read for longer than a few minutes at a time. at one point, my sixty-something year old mother had to hold me up so i could walk a lap around the block that i had been running months prior, and it was a super dark time. i am proud of myself for fighting for my health, advocating for humane treatment, and re-learning how to find solace and comfort and reprieve in reading and writing. i was recuperating in bed most of 2021 (when i wasn't struggling to keep my job lol) so i had a lot of time to come up with project ideas but zero stamina to finish them. i'm still not recovered, and have new chronic illnesses out the wazoo now, but i'm in a much better place these days.

...worked on 21 scripts.

includes new and old projects. my brain was scattered, but i tried.

...developed 12 new project premises.

some are good, others are dogshit. but who cares!

...finished 5 scripts.

three half-hour scripts, and two elevens. combined, that's almost two episodes of prestige television. i'm coming for your ass, tony gilroy!!!

...read 25 books.

comic books, ya novels, non-fiction, autobiographies, picture books; you name it, i read it. most of what i read went in one ear and out the other because of the covid brain damage, but i remember how soothing the act of reading a book while curled up with hot tea under a warm blanket was to my aching brain and body, and i'm glad i tried my best to read even if i knew i could barely understand. a third of this list is picture books and/or middle grade books and graphic novels because that's all i could handle at the beginning of the year. and you know what i found? a lot of those kids books are great, and heart-warming, and delightfully more nuanced than i had ever dreamed. the kids are gonna be alright.

...took 6 writing classes.

i'm glad i did this, but looking back on it this was kind of stupid. my brain was burdened by illness and my response was to... burden it more? for fun??? insane behavior. i highly recommend every course i took (chris amick's pilot development, multiple classes at writing pad, rad sechrist's project tv writing class, patricia villanuvella's 11-minute episode format class, and more) but i do not recommend taking them while your head is fucked. if anyone is interested in learning more about these courses, let me know!

...took on my first pitch project.

i was hired to help write and pitch a kids show, and learned a lot about the pitching process. mostly i learned that an upbeat attitude and a corny joke or two will go a long way. also, that the tv industry is an ouroboric cesspool constantly feeding on its own shit, but i digress.

...developed my first original show pitch.

it's uglier than sin but i love it. developing the pitch actually made me realize the concept is better as a novel series than a show, but i appreciate how much that process taught me about exploring format, structure, and the art of pitching.

...landed my first staff writing gig.

this was my proudest moment. in between numerous ER visits, doctor's appointments, health scares, housing issues, and more, i broke into the industry i love.

in 2022, i...

...was still pretty fucking sick, but doing better.

title says it all. despite losing my emotional support animal to leukemia, i hung in there. feels good.

...took on three writing mentees.

this is still the most shocking thing i did last year. i became a mentor to three fellow brown folks and i love them all dearly. i don't know if i'm a stellar mentor or anything, but i would do just about anything to help them reach their writing goals. i always thought i hated teaching, but it turns out i really enjoy working one-on-one with people as a guide rather than an instructor. my goal is to help all of my mentees break into their respective industries in the next two years.

...took three writing classes.

at this point i'm mostly taking these to meet people and learn new tips and tricks, but i still found them highly rewarding. plus, i realized i work best when i know someone expects to read what i've written the following week. nothing makes you keep a writing deadline like the pain of disappointing a peer! :D

...wrote 63,207 words for work.

i worked two staff writer gigs and seven freelance or contract gigs, and wrote more in a year than i ever have, ever. i know this number isn't high to prose writers, but a 25 page script is around 4,800 to 5,000 words. that's a lot of pages.

in total, i wrote around 22 scripts for work last year.

...wrote 50,018 words for original projects.

i only finished three scripts, and most definitely did not hit my goal of finishing my feature script, but i still finished. all three projects were complex, adult-oriented, and of personal significance to me, and it felt really good to finally finish them. i don't love all of them, honestly, but one of them got me my current manager and generated some buzz around my name that kept me employed, so i'm incredibly appreciative of the work i put into them, and the work they've given me in return.

...read 50 books.

this is my crowning achievement of 2022! i used to be an avid reader and then stopped out of nowhere for several years, but last year i fell back in love with reading, big time. i am proud to say that after a year of re-cultivating my reading comprehension and attention span, i can once again knock out a 300 page book in a day (with some assistance from my good ol' friend, hyperfixation). coaxing myself to just read five pages a day really helped me with some of the executive function issues of not wanting to pick up a book. if you're struggling with reading habits, i really recommend lowering your bar to entry. read for a minute, or read one page, or even just one paragraph. eventually the habit will reform and you'll be back to reading longer.

...wrote 51 loglines.

i struggled to come up with new, creative ideas in 2021, so this jump from 12 to 51 was startling, but highly satisfying. once i stopped worrying about whether the ideas were good, i was able to do more with the freeness that comes with happily being shit at something. and you know what? once i got the shit ideas out, i found a couple of really good ones at the bottom of the barrel.

...had a pretty alright year.

shit still went sideways, i was overworked and exhausted, and my personal life imploded, but looking back on it, i had a lot to be grateful for, and a lot of love and support in my corner, and i'm going to try to be mindful and thankful for the aforementioned as i push myself a teensy bit further in 2023.

...have a few goals for 2023.

they are:

work less, read more

write more indulgent stuff (gay porn, fic, all the nasty dark shit i like)

eat more veggies

do some fucking wrist exercises and get a desk pedaler because holy shit my joints are aging like MILK

thanks for reading.

[sweetswesf]

Hey hey, y’all.

I’m mad Tumblr STILL hasn’t responded to any of my support tickets to get my messaging back. As an engineer, I am criticizing the app in a different way than most lol. There’s a lot of cool things with the UI, but the way you can’t separate primary & secondary blogs, some of the playback, the slow or no responses on support tickets is kinda getting to me. I didn’t think it’d frustrate me this much, but it does…Maybe it was protection…

I made a lot of progress last week. I feel like I am making strides and getting stronger with concepts. I had 2 onsites and a practice technical and I felt I did pretty good in all of them. Rejected from one in less than 24 hours, but that 1 involved a lot of semi negative back & forth with the recruiters for over a month, so I felt the decision was made before I even did the interview.

I was exhausted, but felt like I was detaching from the pain of things and just telling myself get through it. Even in my workouts. My body was tired but it felt like it was moving without my mind. I know it’s only God…I spent less time on social media, I spent less time procrastinating, and I can get through most 12 hour days without needing a nap. I am completely wiped out on my break days (Sundays) and take 4 hour naps then lol but I remember a time during my early months of being laid off where I couldn’t get through the day without a 3 hour nap.

I am about done with the sections of the API YouTube course I want to go over. It is a really good course and it’s at a good level of detail I need. I was familiar with the material, but this was good to solidify understanding of certain concepts. I think I have like one more day left that I’d like to spend on it for prep for my interviews. A lot of things make a lot more sense. I wanted to get past it so that I can focus more on system design and algos, but it was necessary to go over. I’m trying to balance learning quite a bit of topics: system design, APIs, DS&A, OOP, behavioral questions.

For you that have been commenting on my posts encouraging me, especially @mythgrippa-blog & @tenaciousdeveloper, I want to send a particular word of appreciation. Whenever I get a bit discouraged, I remember your comments, so thank you so much.

I even caught a butterfly by its wings! I’ve always wanted to do that, but I don’t think I’ll ever do that again. I won’t forget how surprisingly strong it was wriggling to get free. I quickly released it when I realized I could be hurting it’s wings! I’m sure I did though and the thought makes me sick. I never meant to hurt it. These are sentient beings. There was no need for me to do that. I didn’t realize I would hurt it before I did it. I was on break from an on-site, feeling good, listening to this song, and intrusive thoughts took over.

It flew away fine, but still…I’m sure I damaged the wings just by touching it. I felt a similar guilt when I thought my car would clear and not hit this cat that was laying in the middle of the street. It didn’t and I killed a little collar-less white kitten 😔. This was almost a decade ago. I don’t even own a car anymore but I still think about it & feel guilty.

I took a Cruise autonomous car ride. That was my 3rd time in an autonomous car ride, but 1st one by Cruise. After it, I was inspired. This is the type of things that drew me to tech in the 1st place…

School loans start accruing interest again at the end of this month, and I would like to pay those off. I haven’t looked into deferring my payments because I’m hoping I can pay them off before needing that option. It is humbling to go from having a lot of autonomy with spending to relying on government assistance. Life comes at you fast…I can’t judge anyone. I do, but I shouldn’t and I try not to. I am reminded everyday, with every new experience or challenge, that you truly don’t know what people are facing or what the heck you would do if in a similar scenario. Ideas & history are different from reality.

Pastor at church today said, “You think you have strong faith until something happens that tests it,” and I related hard. I reflect on everything. Sometimes I just sit and stare like, “I’m tired and I’m ready for a different reality.”

My mom comes at the start of September too, and I would like to fully enjoy that with her with my dream job. I will enjoy it regardless though.

I order from DoorDash less, to save money, and also, because there’s not that many options that are healthy, and regardless if the meal is healthy or not, I’ve had it so many times that I’d rather just try to make a replica of my own if I have time. Some things I just can’t replicate, but I do like that I’m empowering myself to have some control over that. I’m often negotiating between saving money and saving time when it comes to this food stuff.

Also, food at this point is one of the only break aways from work that I’m allowing myself to enjoy right now. A LOT of my community has left the city or don’t reach out despite my efforts of trying to maintain the relationship. I don’t want to forge new ones right now, because the emotional and financial investment is… a lot right now. Anytime you want free time outside these days, you end up spending like $50 at minimum! I also feel like I need to find someone to help on Sundays. Sundays are for rest though, and so far, I’ve taken up the whole day washing my hair, going to church, grocery shopping, cooking, eating, napping for 3 or 4 hours, reflecting, and YouTube video watching. I don’t study, I don’t do any chores, and I don’t even like cooking those days. I appreciate my Sundays for what they are for: rest.

A few people close to me asked me again this week if I wanted to keep doing this and I was audibly annoyed. They don’t think I’ve made success in the way I should, but they don’t know much about the industry or how things typically go on this side. They also don’t know my plan. They don’t have to, but it does because it kind of feels they don’t believe in my abilities. I don’t want to be struggling forever, but I don’t think I should give up. I want to do this. I mean, I even get the question a lot in interviews. Like, I transitioned about 3 years ago. Why are you still asking me why I transitioned? You’re wasting time when you could be asking me about my qualifications for this role. I’m sure non-career-transitioners (people with traditional backgrounds) don’t get asked why they chose that field. Does it matter WHY I’ve chosen it if I’ve been gainfully employed in it for years and am applying to keep doing it? It shouldn’t. This question is totally valid outside of interviews. I appreciate answering it then. It just feels invasive when asked in interviews. I could see if I was fresh out of my old career, but I’ve been working as a full time software engineer for more than 3. It almost feels like, “well duh!” at this point when it comes to choosing tech. Look around you. Why not?! EVERY industry damn there has been elevated and can’t survive without tech. It’s really hard to cover your basic needs and a lot people on a 6-figure salary are living paycheck to paycheck given how outrageous rent is. At least tech gives you a fighting chance. Look at me! A tech worker still with debt who’s now had to rely on government assistance…It feels similar to interviewers asking why I majored in something. It doesn’t matter at all when you should be looking at the work I’ve done for money.

It was recommended, and I agreed, that I should stop interviewing with startups and start interviewing with companies I would like to work at, so I’m doing that soon. I feel a bit impatient and when I do, I try to refocus and remind myself that I shouldn’t give up and potentially blow the progress made thus far (another word of encouragement from y’all reading, so thank you!). I just need to keep going, stop feeling rushed, be fearless, be strategic, have confidence, and know that God will give me something great in due time that’s fit for me that exceeds my expectations.

I’m grateful for vision, dexterity, my mental health, my education, having hot water, still being able to afford a gym membership and to never go hungry. To spend on organic groceries. I also still have quite a bit of savings. I didn’t realize but my high yield savings account has been kicking me back about the amount of a week’s worth of meals & groceries every month. Praise God. I also am still able to tithe and be generous to people who need help during this time.

The things that I wanted months and even weeks ago, like purses, shoes, etc. all seem so frivolous now. Thousands on these things? I’ve never spent that much on purses & shoes. I’ve never been that girl, but I HAVE bought a lot of excess before, or bought things, albeit cheap, that I thought I would use one day. I even imagined that once I get a job, I would treat myself on one of those $1k+ purses, just because I’m a 30 and never have bought anything designer. Now, I don’t even care about taking a vacation. I just want to wake up employed. I WILL take a vacation, but I don’t mind just visiting something local. I miss NYC like crazy! I’ve always wanted to visit Atlanta (my 1st visit was at night and was too short, I had to drive back to Nashville in the morning). Those purses and shoes are still NICE but, I don’t HAVE to have them like I once felt…Imma still treat myself, but the treats won’t be as extravagant/often/out of my honest price range.

Fashion blogs seem so DUMB to me now. The THOUSANDS people will pay and still be in debt or not own any assets seems CRAZY now. But it took this to open my eyes. I’ve been unemployed before when I was fresh out of bootcamp, and I went into super frugal mode, and promised myself to maintain those habits. I did a lot, but still made dumb decisions after I got employed again. Freeing myself from want this time around, I hope it sticks.

There were days this week where I woke up wanting to contact a particular dude from my past. Just thirsty and lonely and craving a hug. I kept saying, “I just want a hug.” It’s really just me. Day in & day out. Friends & family only call. Everyone close to me I have to talk to virtually through a screen/over the phone. It gets to me…someone will love me hard and give me the affection I crave one day. I need to rely on God’s love though and remember not to put too much dependence on people, but it’s okay to want a partner. God honors marriage and says a spouse is to supply the other’s needs for affection. Not one way: this is for both partners.

I’m grateful for everything this time has taught me and I don’t know if I would have learned it without this. I shun fear of not getting what I want. I refuse to believe that my efforts will go unrewarded. I chase away the devil that made me believe I was less than. In the meeting with my mentor last week, he said, “I’m going to be candid: the team did NOT like that you were let go. We all felt that you had made so much progress and we actually had a rant session about it.” That almost made me cry, because I felt like the weakest link on the team at that time, but to know that people respected my work and felt like great things were coming for me, confirmed my suspicions too that I KNEW things were looking up. I had finally felt comfortable, and then it felt like my progress was stopped. But I know, and I knew even when I got laid off, even without my next position, it wasn’t a mistake. God tends to shift things when you’re feeling comfortable. He’s trying to elevate me. I will be in a higher position my next role, potentially making more than double what I was. More than what I could have gotten if I stayed. I don’t fear getting let go as much anymore because I know how to do these algos, or, I know where I can go to refresh my understandings of them. I lived in fear before this and couldn’t truly enjoy anything because I knew there was a huge hole in my understanding of things in the interview & my career that I felt I didn’t have the time to learn. Nothing is by mistake and I’m grateful to Him. Amen!

I hope y’all are well too. Be blessed <3

[parageist]

fuck it im gonna do all of these

1. elegyEstranger, which is also the username for my oc reverie willow, main character of my webcomic exspiravit :3

2. nope. just mixed two cool sounding words together lol

3. don’t have one! :’)

4. nope. maybe i’ll try getting them into it though lmao

5. not in any serious way but i do like to act like dave, nepeta, june, aradia, and a bunch of other characters a lot and i relate to them a bunch x3

6. oh boy i’ve changed it so much i think i’ve identified as almost every aspect and class at least once before lmao. i think im either a rogue of life or a rogue of time but idk, they’re all so cool lol. and im a prospit dreamer

7. yes! i made a bunch of dave stickers last year

8. yeah, i’ve made fan comics on mspfa, which is what got me into making webcomics lmao

9. nope

10. yup, i was vriska as halloween for 2018 (which may or may not have been a heavy sign that i was trans), dave as halloween for 2019, and aradia for 2020. im going to comic-con this saturday and might go as dave, i still have all the stuff lmao

11. nope

12. nope

13. dave 😎

14. hmmm. it really depends on what value you measure how “favorite” they are… but probably one of the alpha trolls like damara, horrus, or porrim, which i am 100% guilty of neglecting them due to their tiny screen time. they’re just so forgettable, but that’s likely hussies fault.

15. uhhhhh… davekat? junedave? davejade?? (not beating the “crush on the cool guy fictional character which i first thought was just me idolizing him but then as i got older i realized it was just my closeted bisexuality and liked to imagine myself with him” allegations 😔)

16. huh?

17. you’re just making up acronyms at this point smh

18. no, but i would like the fandoms awful reputation to go away.

19. ive played hiveswap act 2, but not friendsim or pesterquest or the epilogues/homestuck^2

20. literally the greatest inspiration to me, everything down to my artstyle. i’ve been a fan since i was like 10/11 lmao (my parents did NOT like me reading that at a young age) and so it pretty much defined all of my middle school years

21. yes! i saw someone at my old school with a homestuck shirt and we became friends. we still talk sometimes but they moved far away :(

22. yeah

23. i never really fully read all of it, i stopped being able to understand after act 4 lmao. but i eventually “read” and by read i mean skimmed through the rest of it a few times, along with reading the wiki, watching videos about it, and watching other people read it, so i would say that culminative experience counts

24. i skipped most of the dialogue after act 4 lmao. too many words formatted in an inaccessible way for my adhd and dyslexia xD the animations and art was the one thing that kept me through it though

25.🙂

26. very very very cool i love the way it’s presented and the interactability and the art style and animations and music and characters and writing (besides some very questionable things) and lore and concepts and GOD ITS SO COOL RARRRRGH I LOVE SBURB AND GOD TIERS AND STUFF ASHDHHDHJJG

27. humans, for relatability. sometimes i think trolls are overrated but they’re also cool. and carapacians are underrated little guys but besides being silly little guys there’s nothing much more to them. besides badass ring power shit and the midnight crew and royalty

28. descend, cascade and collide were all so fucking awesome

29. hmm. the trolls all killing each other? vriskas return? but i guess at the same time they create really cool narrative stuff, they’re just unpleasant from a watching-your-blorbos-kill-each-other standpoint lmao

30. im tired, no

31. im into it, im inspired by it, i may post stuff about it from time to time, but that’s it lmao

“Homestuck Isn’t Dead” Tag

I wanted to make one, so send a number or reblog to get one!

1. Do you have a chum handle? What does it mean?

2. Is your username homestuck related/have you had one hs related?

3. Do you call your s/o a matesprit?

4. Do you call your best friend your moirail?

5. Are you “kin” with any characters or commonly called a character?

6. God Tier?

7. Do you make HS fanart?

8. Do you make hs fanfiction?

9. Do you roleplay homestuck? where and how often?

10. Do you cosplay homestuck characters? Who and where?

11. Are you apart of ask blogs?

12. Are you in any homestuck groups?

13. Favorite character?

14. Least favorite character?

15. OTP?

16. NOTP?

17. BROTP?

18. Do you want homestuck to just die already?

19. Are you following up with hiveswap? Do you play? Watch YT videos?

20. Tell us how homestuck has effected you in real life?

21. Have you met anyone through homestuck?

22. Have you left the fandom before?

23. How many times have you read through it?

24. Did you ever skip intermissions/dialog/animations?

25. Opinions on the fandom?

26. Opinions on the comic?

27. Do you favor the trolls, humans, or carapaces?

28. Favorite moment of all of homestuck?

29. Least favorite moment of all of homestuck?

30. Tell us a homestuck based story.

31. How homestuck related is your blog?

[str4yp1xel]

WHO I AM.

12/09/2024

I am this guy :3

And also this guy

Uhhh this guy too…

Actually, I am many people.

I go by Perry but call me whatever, Stray, Pixel, Peregrine, whatever feels most formal to whichever is casual and informal, I don’t care.

I use He/Him, Ve/Ver, and Rot/Rots pronouns. Take your pick.

I’m a trans masc, genderfluid, trans and technically gnc man. And I enjoy making complicated characters :3.

Half Samoan, fluent English speaker—American dialect, and learning German (surface level understanding)

Master of many, Jack of all trades, maybe.

Psychology, paleontology, archeology, anthropology, history, philosophy, art, sociology, cultural, paranormal, literature, medical (in general), and zoology enjoyer.

Multifandom + Multishipper (prosh!ppers STAY AWAY. YOU AREN’T WELCOME.)

I am a self-taught artist and I make shitty doodle art to express storytelling because big rendered projects take longer and by the time I’m done I’m already over it or I’ve forgotten.

I am also a MINOR!!!! 13+!

WHAT I AM DOING.

Your mom

I am making a shittily drawn comic about some Minecraft OCs I’ve had baking for a while now.

I’ve always wanted to put my thoughts on…Paper? A digital canvas? Whatever.

Don’t expect high quality comic pages lol. They will never happen. (Or, if you’re expecting anything at all for that matter…)

I have almost no executive function! Which means, art can come late. I might be in a large hiatus for an unnecessary amount of days, and I’ll most likely forget about this account after a certain amount of time, but hey. What’s an artist without life constantly hitting at them? It’s alright, things happen.

WHY?

Simple. Entertainment!

Okay, maybe that’s not the full synopsis.

I’m a creative mind, and for a while I’ve wanted something to show for that. But, I had nothing.

I’m a self-taught character design artist who designs beyond the way the character looks.

I enjoy making characters with purpose, and I like making them according to personal experiences, most of them being metaphors.

I also rewatched some pretty awesome cartoons *COUGH COUGH* Gravity Falls, Steven Universe, and The Owl House *COUGH COUGH*, and needless to say, I got inspired…

INSPIRATIONS

(credits/recommendations)

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

Gravity Falls!

Character Development + more

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

Steven Universe

Character Development

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

I know I mentioned The Owl House, but it was indeed, not The Owl House.

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

Minecraft!…Duh!

World building…Obviously.

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

Call Of Duty (Cold War’s AND BO6’s campaigns)

Character Behavior + World Building

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

Death Note

Character Development + Character

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

One Punch Man

World Mechanics

🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷🫁🦷

More will be added soon…And yes, I’ll add actually people and not just franchises. Just give me a minute…

I WILL DO A FAQ IF AND WHEN PEOPLE HAVE QUESTIONS!!! ITS TIME TO PUT YOUR CRITICAL THINKING AND OVER-ANALYSIS SKILLS TO THE TEST!!! :D

DISCLAIMERS!!!

I am not an expert

I suck at anatomy (go-figure) and also landscaping (no shit)

I’m not an accurate source for things like war, cultures, ethnicities, politics, or anything of that sort. This includes communes and non-western militant groups/movements. I know nothing about most of the histories I source, and I do quick units on each culture I base my characters + The End’s, The Nether’s, and The Overworld’s biomes on.

I’m not a professional, I don’t have PhDs, nor do I major or specialize in these kinds of topics, so I could be on about nothing.

Don’t underestimate me, but don’t EVER take anyone’s word on the internet. PLEASE find sources and sites off of a reliable place, and come back to me when things make sense.

FEEL FREE TO CORRECT ME OR SHARE IF YOU SEE AN INACCURACY IN YOUR FEATURED CULTURE!!! YOU WOULD KNOW BETTER ABOUT YOUR OWN CULTURE THAN I DO.

I would love to learn more!!!

I also feature some disabilities + heavy topics on trauma, and psychosis, so if you have personal experience or if you know more about psychology and physiology, BY ALL MEANS, LET ME KNOW!!!

This comic is still a rough draft, meaning the majority is based off of viewer’s engagement! So if you see a flaw, or if there’s something neat or a headcanon you’d like to add, yes even grammar corrections, my asks and replies will always be open— BUT! I will never open DMs, unless I make an exception.

No, I don’t add people or offer for others to work with me. I’m a minor and even if I’m above 13, I do not feel comfortable talking to people online casually. Conversations will stay formal, and if I do let anyone work with me on this (I highly doubt anyone would want to), I’d keep the relationship purely professional. No, this isn’t a paid job, and no, this isn’t a big time company project, but it’s what I’m comfortable with, unless I’ve seen you IRL.

I’ve also seen people reblogging with image ids, listen, I’m all for making things more accessible, but my brain is fried by the time I post my art. Feel free to add those too :D!! You can also correct words from different languages, or translate my work! Do whatever you need to, you will not be judged.

I do not want to make profit off of Minecraft’s or anyone else’s hard work (even though Mojang is already pretty rich— I MEAN WHO SAID THAT—) so in my defense of copy right, I’m just a game loving nerd who likes the characters more than the actual plot.

MY ART IS “WOKE”!!! I WILL REFERENCE POLITICAL ISSUES AND EVEN MAKE BIOMES AND VILLAGES/COUNTRIES BASED OFF IT!!! ONE OF MY CHARACTERS RUN A REBELLION, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!

I make pretty controversial characters with controversial labels/character traits, so if you see a trait you don’t like— GOOD! If it’s an actual offensive problem, please let me know. I will also do polls to see if it’s just a personal bias or an actual general sentiment- upon request or personal judgement of course.

I make inaccurate fake gore, if you see something I right or if it’s not correct, let me know! And I’ll try to ‘redraw’, so to speak, the panel.

YOU MADE IT

Yay! The end! That’s all I have. For now…

Until then, stick around for the journey. Maybe this account will actually grow and maybe even go places. I’m excited to see where this takes me, and I’m glad I found a way to finally make this work.

Here, a picture of one of my main characters. On the house, for your troubles.

[shawnjacksonsbs]

"Far be it from me, and forgive me for asking, and I don't mean to pry, but would you consider yourself a happy person?" 4-13-24

"How many of us, I wonder, can recall a childhood moment when we experienced happiness as a state of being? That single moment of untarnished joy. That moment when everything in our world, inside and out, was all right. Everything was all right. But, now, we've become a colony of adults and everything is all wrong, all the time. It's as if we're on a quest to get it back and yet the more we focus on our own personal happiness, the more it eludes us. In fact, it's only when we are otherwise engaged, you know, focused, absorbed, inspired, communicating, discovering, learning, dancing, for heaven's sake, that we experience happiness as a by-product, a side-effect. Oh no. We should concern ourselves not so much with the pursuit of happiness, but, with the happiness of pursuit." - Professor Coreman from Hector and the Search for Happiness

I watched.

I watched Hector expecting, eh. . .

but he ended up finding his silver (-ish).

I learned, what most probably already know, most of us don't have the money or the means to go all- eat, pray, love in the search for happiness.

We have to try and find it here, in our . . .stuckness, which is inherently part of the problem in itself.

A little traveling and moving can work wonders on those of us who needed a journey of discovery to find our truth.

I am one of the fortunate ones in that respect. I think I'm somewhere between the poor inner urban kid/poor white trash kid from the country - and that eat, pray, love shit. Lol no lol

~some notes, not edited:

Writing all the time letting you all know how I found it.

May not even work for some of you.

Do you even know what makes you happy?

And are you a happy person?

~more, unedited:

Happiness, just like the rest of my emotional states are . . .varying and in bouts, with peace and joy at the pulpit.

~even more:

Happiness as a state of being probably hasn't existed inside of me since before the fear of knowing "life's not forever" really took hold of me.

Early childhood, probably. It's been bouts ever since.

What is happiness?

Are you happy?

Ask me as a question looking back on a limited amount of my time, and my answer will be yes . . .now.

That wasn't always so.

In the now, it may or may not be, but inevitably, it's always on a rising curve, for grading purposes. At least it has been for about the last 10 years or so. Lol no lol

Ever changing, ever learning, ever growing, and of course, ever grateful.

Almost, always, like as almost to always as you can get without being actual always, I am at peace.

It feels so . . .always most of the time.

Its close enough to constant for me to say, always.

~end of notes.

Hector and the Search for Happiness did play me. I shouldn't have prejudged. I hoped it would be good and it surpassed that. I really liked it.

Instead of one final quote at the end, I'm going to share Hector's list from his journey. If you get a chance go watch the movie. Let me know whatcha think.

Remember to share your love and your laughter with all the rest of us.

And please be kind as always as possible. Civility is only the back up plan. Lol

Until next time;

"1. Making comparisons can spoil your happiness.

2. A lot of people think happiness means being richer or more important.

3. Many people only see happiness in their future.

4. Happiness could be the freedom to love more than one woman at the same time.

5. Sometimes happiness is not knowing the whole story.

6. Avoiding unhappiness is not the road to happiness.

7. Does this person bring you predominantly a. up b. down?

8. Happiness is answering your calling.

9. Happiness is being loved for who you are.

10. Sweet Potato Stew!

11. Fear is an impediment to happiness.

12. Happiness is feeling completely alive.

13. Happiness is knowing how to celebrate.

14. Listening is loving.

15. Nostalgia is not what it used to be." - Hector

[crehador]

2 18 25 ! 🪱

combining these!

2) what work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

all of them no in all seriousness uhhh maybe the one that necessitated these tags

of my three appare-ranman fics two were so uwu and then there was this old man bastard yaoi lol

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

i feel like i rarely actively seek out inspiration these days, it comes from everywhere! there's too much of it in fact!! my problem has always been too many ideas and not enough time/creative ability to write them all

for icsm especially it comes from all over the place, everything reminds me of them lmao like i'll just be watching haruki play totk and my no thoughts head empty icsm only brain will be like "oh oh oh samatoki plays totk"

12) your weaknesses as an author

oh so so many and i don't even say that as a bad thing, it is always good to know you have room to improve!

i think one of my biggest weaknesses is descriptive writing. not all writing has to be Very descriptive to be good, but it is something i would like to improve on in my own work

another is... earnestness, maybe? like sometimes i worry i pull away from meaningful moments when i should be leaning in to them

also action scenes/fight scenes! i don't write them very often and would love more practice with those

13) your strengths as an author

i hope it's dialogue and comedy lol because i am always writing those a lot and they are very fun to write! lovely commenters have also said on some occasions that i am good at characterization which feels almost too generous but would be neat if true

like personally i don't think my characters (in fanfic) are necessarily always the most in-character, but i do think one of my strengths is keeping characterization consistent and believable within a fic. so even if it's maybe a bit off from canon, within an isolated fic it more or less tracks and ends up feeling (i hope) like 'good' characterization

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they?

many!! i don't think i have enough self-awareness to know exactly what affected me in what way, but i was one of those book-a-day kids growing up (oh to read that regularly again) and i'm sure many of those works influenced me greatly

i was also a memory-issues kid so i would struggle to remember what was most impactful though lmao

while it doesn't answer this question directly one thing i do remember is always struggling with like reading something great and thinking "this is good writing! and i don't write like this! therefore i must be a shit writer!" which is a way of thinking that is very important to unlearn lol (good writing can be good in different ways!)

so my recent journey has been more about not deliberately trying to emulate other writers too much, though i had a disastrously long phase of my youth in which i read way too many old white guys so tbh i probably write like an old white guy rn

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of

the first thing that came to mind was a moment in pride (tg!au) but it's like the moment that i kind of don't want to pull out of context lol (the "i like you weird" conversation)

so i will go with a bit from stay gold that i skimmed again and don't hate:

"I would have rather had your bite," Usui admitted candidly, palming the gold coin and making it disappear into his sleeve once more. "I would have rather known you were capable of mourning your own life, of believing its loss would be worth avenging. But when you wouldn't bite down, even when I forced the coin between your teeth, even as your life bled away from you, I came to a realization. "It didn't matter if it was your bite or mine, if it was your choice or mine. There was a time when I believed the choice to live could only be made by you and you alone, and I must confess I still long for the day you'll be able to choose to live for yourself once more. "But until that day arrives, until you are prepared to make that choice, the others and I will choose for you. Because what matters to us, Taishin-sensei, is that you live."

[sometimesanalice]

Ah Fabiola!

This was such a fun reblog to get! Thank you for taking the time and effort to write all of this out! I'm so happy you enjoyed it! I loved writing it! I loved getting to revisit these two!

more for you friend!

I liked how you described her indecision in choosing the costume. The image of her in front of her wardrobe while she stares at all her clothes and tries to put on a costume was so real! As was her agitation to meet Bradley's friends.- Its that moment when you put so much pressure on yourself that you're kind of blinded by everything trying to find something perfect. I loved the idea of her having this immaculate closet that looks like its been hit by a tornado because she's trying to will something perfect to come inspire her.

“You, 12:23 PM: And you only have yourself to blame for those pushups. (PS. I told you what time it was before I got in the shower, you were the one who invited yourself to join. PPS. I liked that thing you did with the shower head)”

Their text exchange drove me crazy, really sexy! Now I can't think of anything other than Bradley and the seven settings of the shower head🫠❤️‍🔥- This was so fun! I usually plot out my stories pretty fully, but their text convo was something that snuck up on me and I love how it turned out! I wanted to show why they were a couple worth rooting for, even as they both kind of spiral individually. It was fun to let them be cheeky and flirty!

“But it didn’t matter because it was all going to end the same way: with you tipsy and giddy and in Rooster’s bed.”

Seems like the best way to end the night 🫠

I loved the moment when she had the idea of ​​dressing like Bradley, especially the fact that she used his shirt, I found this gesture of wearing his clothes so sweet and intimate. - I'm so happy you thought that part was cute! I really liked it being the shirt he had left behind in his rush to get out the door that morning. Also, here's the shirt I imagined it being!

“And the others?” Rooster asked with a smirk.

“Let’s just say I’m a better pilot than I am with a piping bag,”

I perfectly imagined the expression with which Mav said this sentence😂- bless him, he TRIED! I loved the idea of the domesticity of Penny and Mav having a cute little baking night in, and Amelia just absolutely ROASTING him, lol

“Once your girl sees these abs she might be my girl by the end of the night.”

Okay, Jake's entrance was epic, in true Hangman style! I also loved his costume choice, it's so spot on for him.- THIS MAN! He's so funny. He definitely think's he's the main character, but she's only got eyes for the man with those long legs in the short shorts!

“Well, if it ain’t Rooster,” he hears Hangman call out from across the room. “We just did this, man,” he tosses back, not bothering to look up from his phone.”

This part was so beautiful. The natural and playful way Jake called her by Bradley's call sign, AHH i loved it, I think maybe her entrance was the best, I like how she captured attention and left everyone speechless. And the fact that Bradley initially thought he was referring to him and was almost annoyed by Jake's comment was brilliant.- Jake is so observant, it HAD to be him who first noticed her! It was a fun way to tie in their dynamic from Oh Christmas Tree too, because the first glimpse we get of her is her teasing him, but also he's the one she calls when she needs help with something that Bradley can't help her with. So getting to revisit them here was such fun!

“No, not you. The better Bradshaw,”

The better Bradshaw😂- I have had this line written for MONTHS! (since JANUARY!) And I've adored it endlessly since them, so finally getting to share the whole story with this moment was so exciting for me!

It's my favorite getting to blend in the cheeky and the emotional with the humor, so I'm so happy you enjoyed all those elements in this one!

Seeing Double

Summary: Two weeks had felt like more than enough time to come up with something. And now you’re costumeless and in a panic less than a couple of hours before you’re supposed to be meeting your boyfriend’s closest friends. You’re ready to call it quits when you’re suddenly hit with a burst of inspiration.

Pairing: Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x Female Reader

Length: 6k

Warnings: fluff, allusions to smut, and Bradley Bradshaw in short-shorts (minors dni)

(This fic is a one-shot that is set before the Oh Christmas Tree, but you can read it on its own! Enjoy 🧡)

Looking at your closet, filled with everything and yet absolutely nothing, you’re beginning to realize just how totally and royally screwed you are.

The thing is you’d had time. More than enough time, in fact.

When Bradley had first invited you to go with him to this Halloween party, two weeks had seemed like plenty of time to concoct the perfect costume.

And then the more you’d thought about it, the more you’d overthought it, the more annoyed you’d gotten for overthinking it. A vicious spiral that not even hours of searching on Pinterest had helped to pull you from.

One that had left you costumeless for a party that was supposed to start in less than two hours with all of your boyfriend’s friends.

Fuck.

It was one outfit for one evening. You should probably be more concerned about Ciara from Marketing and her not-so-subtle scheming than what you were going to put on your body for the next five or so hours.

As you a sift through your perfectly color coordinated clothes, dragging hangers across the closet rod as if you’ve been personally victimized by the wardrobe you’d bought with your own money, you can’t help but wonder if you might have some self-sabotaging tendencies.

Bradley Bradshaw had snuck up on you when you were least expecting it. And what you thought was just going to be some summer fun had quickly turned into something more.

More often than not, you were thinking of him.

More often than not, he was texting you throughout the day.

More often than not, you were sharing a bed with him at night.

The last three, almost four, months had flown by in a summer haze and you liked Rooster more than any other man you had dated in the past.

You might even love him, but that was something you were keeping close to your chest for now. It felt too soon to be feeling the way you did about him.

He was more than just the pretty face and easygoing smile that had swayed you into giving him your number. He was more than just a fun night out and some no-strings-attached-yet-mind-blowing sex that you had tried to convince yourself it was.

He’d made it impossible for you to try and keep it casual in the way that he’d thoroughly swept you off your feet. You’d given up trying to keep him at arm’s length after your fifth date with him.

If you couldn’t beat him, you might as well join him. And so far, it was a gamble with your heart that was paying off.

Which was probably why you had given yourself the world’s worst mental block trying to figure out a costume to wear.

You’d met a few of his friends, like Natasha and Jake, during the nights he’d taken you to the Hard Deck. He’d told you that after one of their missions earlier in the year, the members on the squad had been in high demand. But this was the first time you’d be hanging out with them all at once.

So yeah, you were more than a little nervous about this evening.

And you didn’t just want to make a good impression, you wanted to absolutely charm and delight them. These people were so important to him, they were his family. They mattered to him and he mattered to you.

You pull out a black cocktail dress and debate whether you could pull together a Breakfast at Tiffany’s look with the pearls your grandmother had left you. It was a classic for a reason, right?

Or did it make you look like you were trying too hard? She was basically a callgirl after all.

The formfitting little dress goes back on the rack with a little more force than is necessary.

It’s just a causal get together, so why are your palms sweating?

You eye a silky pink slip dress and think about pairing it with one of your overpriced sleep mask. But you think you’d look less like you were flirty, thirty, and thriving and more like you forgotten to get dressed after rolling out of bed.

There are still a couple of cozy plaid button ups that you’d brought with you from home, but unless you carried around a roll of paper towels all night, it was an idea that might get you a more than a few perplexed looks. And there was nothing worse than having to explain your outfit for it to make sense to people.

Or worse, you’d be the one cleaning up spills all night.

You wanted your effort to look effortless.

Cool but not try hard. Thought through but not over the top.

You remember seeing some friend of a friend’s post from last weekend where she was dressed as Kim Possible. Green pants and a black top feel very doable. And she’d looked very cute and low maintenance, which was just the kind of vibe you were going for.

Remembering a pair of green khakis your sister had somehow talked you into the last time she came to visit, you go to your dresser and yank out the drawer you think they’d be in and toss it on the floor. You’re over trying to keep some semblance of order, that’s a problem for future you to deal with now.

Digging around in the pile, you will a flash of olive green to appear before your eyes. And when the items formerly nicely folded drawer and nothing but a heap of wrinkled, olive green-less chaos, you’re hit with the realization that the khakis that had seemed like a bad idea when you’d first gotten them had felt like a bad idea every time you looked at them and they’d ended up in the donation pile during your last closet purge.

You flop down and take in the carnage.

Half open drawers, random tops and skirts flung on your bed, the perfect rainbow of your closet now some technicolored disarray.

You’re almost afraid to pull out your phone to look at the clock, that pressure growing in your chest keeps getting worse. You can almost feel each individual second as they tick by. Glancing down you see that there’s a new message from Bradley, one that you missed in your frenzy to find something, anything to wear tonight.

Bradley, 9:52 AM: That wake up was worth the extra pushups I had to do for being late.

Bradley, 11:10 AM: Did I leave my shirt at your place this morning?

You, 12:22 PM: I’ll check when I get home and let you know. But I’m sure it’s there since I vividly remember the way you took it off last night.  

You, 12:23 PM: And you only have yourself to blame for those pushups. (PS. I told you what time it was before I got in the shower, you were the one who invited yourself to join. PPS. I liked that thing you did with the shower head)

Bradley, 2:37 PM: As I said, worth it (PS pretty sure the only thing I heard you chanting was my name. Also I just ordered a new shower head for my place, one with a fancy handheld and everything)

You, 3:04 PM: I guess I’ll have to wake you up with my mouth more often then. (PS. just curious how many settings does it have? Asking for a friend.)

Bradley, 3:10 PM: Jesus Sweetheart, I’m up next to do a hop… (PS more than enough, and by enough, I mean 7)

You, 3:10 PM: 😘 (PS. can’t wait, I’m more than happy to product test)

Bradley, 3:11 PM: Yeah, I bet you are...

You, 3:11 PM: (Want to know the best part of working from home? I can get off any time I want. Have fun flying with that hard-on, Roos.)

Bradley, 3:12 PM: Baby, you’re killing me here

You, 3:12 PM: Fly safe ❤️

🔴 Bradley, 6:14 PM: Just got home, I can’t wait to see you tonight. What time should I pick you up? You might have to come down though, I don’t know if they’d let me in...

Skimming the previous messages from earlier in the day helps relieve some of the anxious energy that was thrumming in your veins. Because he’s just so Bradley.

He hadn’t been the only one who got to work late this morning. You’d actually worked from the office that day, but it had been more fun to tease him from your desk than draft the internal communications you were supposed to be working on.

The original plan had been to work a half day and then leave early and figure out your costume situation. But then you’d been pulled into an emergency PR meeting on your way out the door for one of the company’s biggest clients and had got home much, much later than you’d planned to.

You’d spotted Rooster’s shirt crumpled on the floor by the foot of your bed, from where he’d shucked it off the night before, the second you’d flown into your bedroom. Now it is carefully draped against the back of the soft blue tufted chair in the corner of your room. It was a colorful patchwork of beach themed vignettes in soft corals, teals, and dark blues. In addition to the palm trees and foliage, there were also planes and ships on it.

It was one of your favorites because you always felt like you were finding something new on it every time he wore it.

He’d told you once early on when you’d first gotten serious, after you’d teased him about his seemingly endless supply, that he’d even gotten curious one drunken night and looked up the resale value on some of his favorites and was shocked at the numbers. That it had taken him a month to put one back on because he didn’t want to ruin any of them on accident, now that he knew what exactly his father had left him.

You knew how much Bradley valued his collection, what they meant to him. You were even watching a few vintage ones in nice condition on Ebay to give him for Christmas.

Letting out a ragged sigh, you look back at the pile on the ground.

You’ve always prided yourself on being a problem solver. And the one time you needed to spring into action with a pivot plan is the one time you’re at a complete loss. You felt paralyzed by indecision and the kind of pressure that only you could put on yourself, which made everything that much more frustrating.

How you had kept the novelty six-pack tank top you’d taken home from a White Elephant exchange, but donated the green khaki pants was beyond you.

Out of the two, one would have been much more practical in this particular moment.

You pick it up off the floor and feel the fabric between your fingers. It was surprisingly soft for something that you’d expect to feel like sandpaper no matter how many times it got washed.

That tank top had never seen the light of day, yet always seemed to make it through your yearly purge unscathed. Probably solely on the fact that it made you giggle whenever you saw it. You always forgot about it, but it was a happy surprise when you pulled it out from where it was tucked away in the back of your dresser drawer.

You let it fall back onto the top of the pile.

Your thumbs hover over the keyboard of your phone as you try to figure out what to say to Bradley, as you look back and forth between your mountainous mess and the empty text box.

You know you could call him and he’d pick up before the third ring. You knew you could text him and he would reply the moment he could. And you know, if you told him you were stressed about meeting all of his friends and wanting to impress them, to impress him, that he would understand. He’d tell you- in that soothing way of his- to not worry about it, that you could just wear whatever made you comfortable, no costume necessary.

He’d probably even ditch his own so that you weren’t the only one there in normal clothes, even though he’d been dropping teasing hint about his for days now. He was so excited for tonight, you didn’t want to bring the vibe down before you’d even arrived.

You close your eyes and allow yourself a couple moments to reset.

What you wore didn’t matter. But whatever you wore, you were going to have a great time with Bradley and the people he cared about. And that was the only thing that mattered to you.

You could throw on your little black dress, or a red and white striped sweater with a pair of glasses, or some skintight leggings and a leather jacket. But it didn’t matter because it was all going to end the same way: with you tipsy and giddy and in Rooster’s bed.

Already feeling much better you open your eyes again.

You’re greeted again with those perfectly sculpted abs of that silly little tank top that still sits on top of the mound of clothes on your floor. But out of the corner of you eye, those cheerful colors adorning your chair in the corner wink out at you.

The glimmer of an idea settles over you like stardust.

It’s on that the more you sit with, the more perfectly solidified it becomes in your mind. Oh, you can see it so clearly now.

It’s an idea that makes you feel like you could bubble over in excitement.

You shoot off a quick text to Rooster and set about grabbing all the things you needed. You’d be a little late, but not terribly so. Fashionably late.

And you’re hopeful it’ll be worth the last-minute change of plans.

There was only one thing you needed that you didn’t already have, and you knew just where you’d be able to find it.

Just a quick little pit stop on the way to the party.

On your way to Bradley.

When Rooster parked in front of Fanboy and Payback’s place he shouldn’t have been surprised to see the Spanish-style house they rented together absolutely covered in every type of decoration imaginable.  

He’d heard Reuben moan and groan about it enough over the last few weeks.

Halloween was Mickey’s favorite holiday and there was nothing more he loved than going all out on a theme. It didn’t matter if it was St Patrick’s Day or National Cheeseburger Day, he always committed.

They’d all be pulled into the argument about whether or not a faux body bag filled with empty bottles should be strung up on the front porch. Fanboy lost that one by a mere two votes. And Bob had been the one to broker the peace by suggesting they make some ghosts to hang up instead.

Dozens of glowing pumpkin lanterns hung from the trees outside and lined the pathway up to the front door. The bushes were wrapped in fibrous looking cobweb material as lights flickered and flashed underneath them. There was a fog machine hidden somewhere because wisps of smoke were curling and crawling along the lawn. Custom gravestones littered the yard along with a few well-placed plastic skeletons. The front of the porch was filled with more pumpkins of various sizes and shapes and colors as well as those truce ghosts and a few oversized bats swaying in the chilly October night breeze.

Rooster wasted no time letting himself in the glowing entryway, rubbing his arms as he hustled to get inside. Normally he ran warm, but he’d been covered in goosebumps from the moment he’d gotten out of the Bronco.

His costume had earned him more than a few wolf whistles when he had stopped to get gas. He’d simply shot them a wink and a smirk as he’d strut past them to go inside and pay.

He looked damn good.

But there was only one person he’d wanted to show off this outfit to.

He didn’t know how it was possible but the inside was even more decorated than the outside of their place was.

There were stands and strands of colorful string lights in black, purple, and orange strung across the ceiling covered by gauzy black fabric. There were more cobwebs covering every exposed bit of the walls and flameless candles lining the floor of the hallway. And there was a mix of eerie forest sounds playing under the Halloween party soundtrack that Coyote had been roped into making for the night.

Bradley follows the hundreds of little plastic spiders decorated the wall leading him to the living room. And almost collides with someone as he rounds the corner.

The shorter man he’d nearly taken out had on an overly bleached and spiked wig with a goatee and was wearing more neon orange flames than any one person should be allowed to wear.

They were both eyeing each other waiting for the other person to lob the first comment.

Rooster sees the way Mav’s cheeks are twitching as he takes in the length of the shorts he was wearing and just how much leg he had on display.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s hear it, old man,” he snorts, reaching out and taking the drink from Mav’s hand and taking a swig from the mostly empty bottle before passing it back.

“Did they lower the drinking age and I missed the memo, kid?” Mav tosses back easily, pointing to Bradley’s clingy, red Rydell High School t-shirt. “Don’t need a Class A misdemeanor on my record, that file is already big enough on its own.”

“Laugh it up, Flavortown,” Bradley snorts, “You on your way out?”

“Yeah, just wanted to swing by for a minute before I go over to the Hard Deck to help Penny out for the night. She sent me with some treats too, they’re over on the table. Where’s your girl? I was hoping to see her before I left.”

“Oh, uh, she’s meeting me here. Said she got caught up in a last-minute meeting,” Bradley says rubbing the back of his neck. He was trying not to over think the text you’d sent him. “So what’s Penny dressing up as?”

Mav uses both hands and gestures to his costume, face flat.

“No shit,” Bradley laughs.

“Amelia hustled the both of us,” Mav says shaking his head fondly. “I’m telling you, kid, teenagers these days are a scary bunch.” He takes the last swig of his beer and passes the bottle to Bradley, patting him on the shoulder. “Make sure you and your girl try the candlestick cakes. The realistic ones are the ones that Penny made.”

“And the others?” Rooster asked with a smirk.

“Let’s just say I’m a better pilot than I am with a piping bag,” he says with a self-deprecating laugh. “Happy Halloween, Bradley.”

“See you on Sunday for brunch.”

He and his godfather exchange a hug before Pete strides out the door, giving him one more pat on the back before he leaves.

Rooster makes his way further into the living room and goes to check out the food situation and to grab a drink in hopes that it’ll help settle that anxious coil in the pit of his stomach.

He waves over to Fritz, Yale, and Omaha, who are dressed up as the Sanderson Sisters, as he makes his way to the dining room. Fritz has his arm draped over his wife’s shoulder who is dressed like a black cat and they’re all gathered around the keg in the kitchen like it’s a cauldron.

Under a display of floating candles, Fanboy and Payback’s dining table is filled to the brim with all kinds of party food. Breadsticks that looked like fingers, a charcuterie board being clutched by a skeleton, a carved pumpkin puking some kind of tasty looking dip, and rice krispies with an ungodly amount of red dye number forty wrapped up in plastic on Styrofoam trays. And of course, the candlestick cakes. It was obvious which one’s Penny had made and which were Mav’s handiwork.

He pops one in his mouth, making a mental note to text Penny about how good they are.

Off to the side there was a homemade cooler shaped like a coffin and a witch’s cauldron bubbling away with dry ice filled with something potent, if the patriotic punch from the Fourth of July was anything to go by.

He grabs one of the plastic syringes from the bowl that says free shots and sips it down easily, trying not to grimace at the ratio of tequila to cranberry cocktail, and then dropping the now empty syringe in the hazardous waste bucket that’s placed next to the bowl.

Checking out the inside of the cooler, he sees it’s been stocked with a good variety of beers and ciders, he even spots your favorite which he knows you’ll be excited about.

That is whenever you get here.

Bradley pulls out his phone from the back pocket of his tight-fitting shorts to see if there’s any new message from you yet.

No ETA, no update, no on my way. Nothing since his last text nearly forty minutes ago. He’s tempted to shoot you another one, but he doesn’t want to come across as overbearing.

Rooster knew you were a bit anxious about tonight, even though all his friends really liked you, but he was starting to think that maybe he might be deeper in this than you were. He was trying not to let his mind spiral about why you didn’t want him to pick you up, but the only thing he kept coming back to was that maybe you wanted a way to make an easy escape if you weren’t having a good time with him or his friends.

He was worried that you might have one foot out the door.

You’ve met most of his friends now, just at different times and never all at once.

After the Uranium Mission, their team quickly became very in-demand. Getting requests to join other training contingents, classified trials and testing of new tech in development, and smaller specialized missions. It’s very rare now that they’re all in the same place at the same time. It always feels like there’s always someone missing, they’re always going and doing.

His team has always been good about finding ways to let off steam.

Although, he’s been less frequently found behind the piano bench of the Hard Deck since he’s taking on a more starring role in your bedroom. His friends would tease him on base about keeping you to himself. But he wouldn’t apologize for wanting to spending all his free time with you than the people he already spent the majority of his days with. Bradley doesn’t want you to feel like he’s trying to keep you away from them, he just would rather soak up all of your attention than share you with everyone else.

He liked that you were his girl.

Sighing to himself, Rooster puts his phone back in his pocket and walks back out to the living room before anyone can accuse him of sulking.

Callie and her fiancée are dress up as Velma and Daphne and chatting away with Bob over by the fireplace that is filled with skulls and thick pillars of candles. Bob’s homemade chef’s hat is glowing lightly from the inside and showing the silhouette of a little rodent.

He watches as Fanboy in his Hamburglar costume heading over of the bathroom with a trash bag looking more than a little suspicious. Bradley is sure he has more than a few pranks up black and white striped sleeves tonight.

“Where’s your Sandy, Danny?” Nat asks, sliding up to him and passing him a beer.

“You know, I don’t actually know what she’s coming dressed as. She never gave me any hints,” he admits, taking a small sip as he takes in her costume. She’s got fluffy bunny ears on and her nose is painted pink. The only thing missing from her Lola Bunny ensemble is the basketball.

“Oh?” He can tell Phoenix is trying to school the surprise on her face. “I just figured with you wearing that and all.”

He just shrugs, his thumbnail picking at the label on the bottle.

Bradley had thought about floating a couple’s costume when he had invited you to come with him, but he pivoted at the last moment, not wanting to put pressure on you to agree to commit right away.

“Is she on her way?” Nat asks, looking at him out of the corner of her all too keen eyes.

“Hopefully, if she doesn’t change her mind,” he says ruefully.  

“Why would she do that? Did you do something to piss her off?”

“Not that I know of. I know I’m reading into things, but I was supposed to go pick her up and she texted me last minute saying that she’d meet me here instead. And I don’t know what to make of it, it just isn’t like her.”

“Is that why you’re standing here look like a sad puppy? You know I’ve never been able to get through those ASPCA commercial without them getting my credit card information. Can I read the text?”

“Sure, have at it,” he says, unlicking and handing over his phone to her. “Uh, just the last few though.” He tacks that last part on quickly and she just gives him a pointed lift of her sharp eyebrow.

He feels dumb watching Nat skim the texts, he knows he’s overthinking things. But he also knows he’s not going to feel better about any of it until you get here and he can see your face.

“She said she’ll be here, Bradshaw. I don’t know how else you’re reading into this, but I imagine the mental gymnastics must be getting tiring.”

Bradley huffs a laugh, because she’s right.

As always.

“Yeah, I know,” he sighs, running his hands through his hair, “It’s just- I really like her, Nat.”

“Oh, we know. You moon after her with those big cow eyes all the time” she teases, nudging her elbow against his ribs. “But I’ve also seen the way she moons after you too, so relax.”

He can’t fight the small smile that works its way onto his face. The idea of you watching him the same way he knows he looks at you when you’re not looking at him makes his chest fill with warmth.

Nat peers around him and he spins to see who’s just arrived.

“Jesus, Rooster. Aren’t you worried about your dick falling out of those? They’re indecent,” Jake drawls, looking every inch the action hero he thinks he is.

“Please,” Bradley says with a roll of his eyes, “You wish you could pull these off, Bagman. If you got it, flaunt it.”

“I’m flaunting plenty,” Jake counters as he flexes. His shirt is unbuttoned all the way to the waistband of his pants. Although, Bradley is pretty sure Indiana Jones at least had sleeves. “Once your girl sees these abs she might be my girl by the end of the night.”

Seresin shoots him a wink and struts away, the plastic whip on his hip bouncing with every step. Rooster just shakes his head after him, watching as he high fives Javy, who is dressed as The Rock complete with a fanny pack and chain around his neck, in greeting by the sliding glass door that leads to patio.

“I still can’t believe you use to date him,” he ribs Nat lightly.

She plucks his beer out of his hand, claiming it as her own in retaliation. “Me neither,” she grunts, but he hears the hint of affection in her voice.

“Hey, you two look great! Do you need anything?” Mickey asks enthusiastically. His shifty eyes and overly wide smile instantly making Bradley edgy.

“Where’d that trash bag you had earlier go, Fanboy?” he asks warily.

“That’s for me to know and Javy to find out about later,” Mickey says slyly.

Rooster and Nat exchange a look.

This was the thing he was worried about when Cyclone had announced the news earlier in the week that they’d all tentatively have the next couple of months off through the new year. A well-earned break. No extra assignments. No extra transfers or additional training seminars.

Mav had told him in confidence that there was one small deployment that might get approved near Thanksgiving and that he was going to pull some string to see what information he could find out about it. Bradley was hoping that you might ask him to come home with you and meet your parents, so he had his fingers crossed that his name was left off that list.

The mood on base was already light. Mickey and Javy had started a series of pranks against each other that had slowly been escalating over the last few days. And Rooster knew that this extroverted bunch would be leaning in at full force and cutting loose tonight.

“Can you do me a favor, man? Can you hold off on the pranks for an hour, I don’t want you guys to scare her off the second she walks through the door.”

“She’s met us, she knows how we are.”

“I think that’s that point,” Nat quips.

“She likes us and we like her, so what’s there to worry about?” Fanboy asks rhetorically.

“Not all at once,” Bradley mutters.

“Lighten up, Rooster! I’m sure she’ll get here soon. In the meantime, go have some of the Potion of Peril punch that I made. I promise we’ll be on our best behavior. I won’t even ask her to grab something from the fridge for me,” Fanboy says that last part with a concerning laugh as he scurries away.

“You won’t what? Wait, Fanboy, come back,” Rooster calls after Mickey. He sees Payback dressed as Marty McFly coming down the stairs, and catches him. “Reuben, hey, what’s in the fridge?”

“Mickey has been collecting all of our empty jars for weeks now. He filled the damn fridge with jars of heads. It scared the shit out of me the first time I saw all of them. I haven’t been able to find the open container of mayo for days, and I’m tired of eating dry sandwiches.” Payback lets out the biggest sigh and rolls his eyes before he leaves them making his way over towards Coyote and Hangman still by the patio.

“See, Nat? This is what I’m worried about. We’re a lot, in more ways than one.”

Bradley pulls out his phone again, probably for the fifth time since he’s arrived and begins working on a text to send her. There’s nothing wrong with a little heads up and if he can get a little update from you then he’ll consider it a win.

“Well, if it ain’t Rooster,” he hears Hangman call out from across the room.

“We just did this, man,” he tosses back, not bothering to look up from his phone.

“Hey! Bradshaw’s girl has got a better set of abs than he does!” someone else calls out.

That gets his attention.

“What the fuck are you guys talking about?” he grunts irritably, as he tries to put his phone back in his pocket.

He doesn’t get a response because Phoenix is already turning him towards the entryway, the room erupting in a series of hoots and hollers as the rest of the party takes notice of your costume.

You’re shifting a little on your feet under the attention, there’s a small shy smile on your face and you have your pretty eyes already trained on him.

Hangman wasn’t kidding when he said you had a better set of abs than him.

You’re wearing a pair of frayed light blue denim shorts with a truly impressive screen-printed washboard stomach is on full display tucked into them. Over that you had on the Hawaiian print shirt he’d left at your place on accident this morning, it was one of his favorites with all its bright colors, along with a pair of sunglasses dangling from the pocket.

There was no mistaking who you’ve come dressed up as, not with that striking press-on mustache you were wearing.

It’s all he can do to just stand there and stare at you.

You’ve always been so damn beautiful, and even with a felt mustache on your face, you can make his heart pound away in his chest. Not to mention, he really likes the way you look in his shirt.

Your face lights up as you take him in too. Your eyes sweeping over his two-sizes-too-small shirt and the white short-shorts that left nothing to the imagination.

There is such fondness on your face he can’t believe how he’d let himself get so twisted in knots.

He forgets about all of his friends and their commotion as he struts over to you taking your face between his hands and kissing you. You make a little noise of surprise that he uses to his advantage to slip his tongue into your mouth.

When one of his friends catcalls them, he waves them off with one of his hands, and then drops it down to your ass to pull you in closer to him.

A flash goes off, the light bright behind his eyes.

He can feel the laughter bubbling out of your chest before comes out of your mouth, even he fights to tamper down his own amusement in favor of kissing you more.

Pulling away Bradley gently takes your chin between his finger and thumb turning your head left and right to admire your costume of choice, up close and personal.

“I gotta say, sweetheart, you’re really working that mustache.”

“I get your attachment to it. I think I wear it pretty well,” you say looking very pleased with yourself. You reach up and affectionately brush your fingers along his own.

He’d thought about shaving it off for the sake of his costume, but ultimately couldn’t go through with it. And now he’s really glad he didn’t.

“It’s not just that ‘stache you’re wearing well,” Bradley says low just for her, toying with the hem of his shirt draped on you. “You know I like the way you look in my clothes.”

He can’t help up enjoy the way you’re getting bashful under his appreciative gaze and compliments.

“I had to make sure you got the shirt back somehow,” you say with a smile.

“So it can end up on the floor of my bedroom instead?” he teases, kissing your cheek.

“I like the sound of that, and not just because my bedroom looks like a crime scene.” He cocks his head at you, but you just shake your own at him in response before continuing, “But I’m letting you know right now, the mustache is staying on when you have your way with me.”

“You have yourself a deal as long as you share your routine with me,” he murmurs, running a finger down the line of the faux abs of your tank top. “Can’t say I remember seeing these this morning in the shower. I’ve got a girl to impress, so I’d be happy to show you how grateful I am for any tips and tricks.”

“Think you’re doing just fine in those short-short of yours,” you reply, taking a step back to give him a thorough once over, “What inspired this eyeful of an ensemble?”

“I knew the shorts would make my ass look good,” he says with a shrug that send you into a fit of giggles. He’s ready to skip the party all together, in favor of appreciating how good you look outside of your costume. Your eyes are dancing with amusement and he finds himself wanted to admit more, “And because, you know…”

He thought his costume idea had been pretty witty, but now he felt a little sheepish because he didn’t want you to think he was being corny. Sure the shorts had been the thing that sealed the deal, but he’d picked good boy Danny Zuko for a reason.

“No, Bradley, I don’t think I do. Will you explain it to me?”

“Summer lovin’ happened so fast and all that.”

“‘And all that’, huh?” And there’s that look of your, he was absolutely putty in your hands when you looked at him like that. “Ok, ok, but I need to know,” you pause for moment, and look up at him with a very serious expression, “Did you have yourself a blast?”

He watches as you bite your bottom lip trying not to laugh at your own joke.

And in that moment, he just knows.

The sureness had been taking up residence in his bones since he’d first convinced you that trying to keep it casual with you wouldn’t cut it for him.

“Would now be a bad time to tell you that I love you?” he asks, threading his fingers through beltloops to pull you in closer to him.

“While I’m wearing a tank top with a six-pack dressed up as you? Seems a little narcissistic, does it not?” He’s never seen your smile this big or this bright before.

He knows. He knows. He knows.

Rooster pulls you back in for a deep kiss.

“I love you too, Bradley,” you murmur against his lips.

He kisses you until he can’t keep the smile off of his face.

“Hey, Bradshaw!”

Surprised, he pulls away from you to see Nat waving him over. He takes your hand, ready to take you over with him.

“No, not you. The better Bradshaw,” Phoenix announces as she points at you, crooking a finger and holding out a shot syringe for you.

You pull him to you, giving him one more quick before floating over to join Nat near the kitchen.

He’s feeling more than a little dumbstruck in that moment.

And not just from the sight of your shapely legs in those cutoff jean shorts.

Bradley’s feet feel cemented to the wood floors beneath his black hightop converse as he watches you throw your head back in laughter at something Nat says.

He doesn’t want to get ahead of himself, but he thinks his last name looks good on you.

You smile wide and beaming, your eyes shining as you turn to look at him from across the other side of the room.

Yeah, it looks really good on you.

Happy Halloween, Friends! This little moment has been living in my head since I posted my first ever fic on here, 'Oh Christmas Tree'! I'm so glad to finally release it to share with you! Thank you for reading!

If you want to find out what happened next for these two, just follow the link above!

If you're curious about what all of their costumes look like, you can see them here!

You can read more of my stories here!

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