#its a lot nicer than my current one

[karda]

ordered a new drawing tablet >_<!!!!! im so excited...

[plaidos]

Something mildly interesting happened today. I'm in the car with my mother and for some reason we end up getting onto the topic of transmisogyny and its pervasiveness in USA society and culture. I forget exactly how we got there, but I'm talking about the cultural attitudes of transmisogyny and my mother brings up terfs. I'm like actually yeah you're right, and bring up Bechdel and Michfest and my mother just immediately goes "Oh yeah, I know all about that."

You see, my mother was in her 20s in the late 90s and actually knew people who went and also knew all about the discussions going on around their exclusionary policies during that time. And she's just like "Oh yeah no I get it Bechdel is 100% a terf" and like. I love my mother but she's a little out of the loop on queer issues, being 50 and her disabilities keeping her from getting out much, leaving her with a somewhat spotty education on current queer topics.

These people being like "oh but Bechdel can't be a terf" have less transfeminist politics than my mother, who doesn't even know a whole lot about transfeminism.

it’s literally that easy. people have constructed white cis butch lesbians from the 90s as this totally morally untouchable group, and in reverse, have constructed their idea of terfs to exclusively be the rabid crazy open nazis like Posie Parker…

it might sound wild to a lot of people now, but folks like Alison Bechdel are the original people the word “terf” was meant to refer to — it was literally coined to describe the people who attended Michfest specifically, how more straightforward does it get than that? — but the overton window has shifted to be so much more violently & aggressively transphobic that she seems like a trans activist in comparison to say, JK Rowling, because she has had the decency to be polite about trans people once or twice.

People don’t seem to understand that the general public is actually much more transphobic than they were fifty years ago; it was generally accepted that reassignment surgery would fundamentally make somebody their “desired gender” even if it was looked down upon, and the radical feminists Bechdel looked up to & took her politics from (like notorious OG terfs Adrienne Rich & Mary Daly) redefined womanhood as specifically people assigned female at birth, and she kept totally in line with those beliefs for decades even whilst she paid lip service about how trans people deserve to be treated nicer. even her so-called pro trans bathroom comic has the undercurrent of the very present terf belief that trans women are reinforcing sexism by presenting traditionally feminine, and that we are treated nicer by straight women for it — like that is fundamentally the punchline of her trans bathroom comic!

but as long as she’s still bragging about how awesome Michfest is in her books, i’m going to call her a terf, because that’s what the word means, so she still is one. i’ll stop when she apologises for being a spineless bigot for decades.

[itsclydebitches]

Hazbin Hotel: Let's Talk About Cursing!

Trigger warning for lots of cursing in this post (obviously) and discussion of canon abuse scenes

As I delve further into the Hazbin Hotel fandom, I’ve inevitably come across a variety of people who dislike the show for an equal variety of reasons. One criticism I’ve seen with some consistency is in regards to the cursing and yeah, I get it. That’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. However, the repeated claim that the cursing is only there as a—failed—attempt at bad, lazy humor got me thinking about why I personally liked the cursing, and why I think it serves a greater purpose in the show.

Now yes, some of the cursing does function as an arguably simplistic joke. The most common setup I’ve noticed is one that leans into a contrast in tone/personalities. We see this a lot with the polite, comparatively timid Charlie as she navigates her distinctly vulgar domain.

Charlie: “Hi, mister!” Demon: “Go fuck yourself!”

The entirety of “Happy Day in Hell” plays with this contrast, setting up Charlie’s slightly skewed, but significantly optimistic perspective of Hell. We are shown again and again how her lyrics are contradicted or twisted into something less innocent through the visuals: a “revealing” street where it’s “hard not to stare” has BDSM going on in a nearby window, Charlie will “open the door” for her people and then literally does so... for a guy who’s already dead. (Or, you know, temporarily out of commission until he heals, or whatever demons do when they’re ‘killed’ by things other than angelic steel.) The entire point here is to contrast the happy, skipping girl claiming that there’s a “warm, fuzzy feeling” in the air with the actual environment of unchecked fires and decaying limbs. And yes, that can be amusing. Not necessarily for everyone as humor is highly subjective and dependent on context, but distilling this contrast down to the shock of a polite greeting getting a “Go fuck yourself!” in response is a kind of entertainment. Especially when Charlie’s reaction adds another layer: for me that’s a very funny—and currently relatable—expression.

We can potentially make the case that this humor format overstays its welcome, but I personally think the show does a good job of keeping Charlie’s cursing both simple and comparatively rare, so that when she is put into these contrast situations the humor lands better. The best example I can think of in the latter half of the show is Susan. There we get the whiplash of polite, trying-to-get-these-people-to-like-her Charlie reaching a breaking point to become “FUCK YOU, YOU OLD BITCH” Charlie. It’s a moment that builds off of the earlier surprise of the courteous Alastor calling someone an “Ornery old bitch”—while Rosie is trying (and failing) to find a nicer way to phrase this.

However, as stated above I think the cursing serves more of a purpose than to just be funny for (some) viewers. Beyond those who simply find cursing distasteful, I’ve seen a fair bit of, “This is so stupid. No one even talks like that!” going around.

Except... I do? I talk like that.

See, I like cursing. I was born to former hippie parents and grew up playing MMOs, so cursing was something I became pretty acclimated to. Personally, I’m glad I was because I’m fascinated by language and cursing—for better or worse—is an integral way that many people communicate. I was taught to see cursing not as the Bad Forbidden Thing You Must Never Ever Do, but rather as just another form of expression, something to be used in moderation and under specific circumstances. Once I became an adult I already understood how I wanted to curse and when it was appropriate to do so. People at work are often shocked when I tell them I curse a lot because no, of course I’m not doing that at my job. That isn't considered professional in this space. Among my friends though?

We can sound a lot like the Hazbin crew.

Undoubtedly the most common curse in the show is “fuck” and its variations, which very much tracks with my personal experience among other people who curse. In fact, it’s so ubiquitous that it barely counts as a curse at all in some groups. It’s more of an easy, accepted way to add emphasis. Vaggie’s “What the fuck was that?” about Alastor’s commercial is a perfect example. She’s pissed and simply saying “What was that?” doesn’t carry the same weight, no matter how angry she may sound when she says it. Vox’s long “Fuuuuuuuck” at the end of “Stayed Gone” conveys an emotion you just can’t capture any other way. No dialogue at all would create a fundamentally different experience of Vox’s feelings and another non-cursing response is just gonna hit different. Not necessarily bad, just different.

“I don’t want to go to the party!” “I don’t want to go to the freaking party!” “I don’t want to go to the fucking party!”

The above represents three distinct characters to me and I think Hazbin Hotel gets that. Cursing isn’t thrown around randomly because something something cursing supposedly sells; it’s all linguistically logical. Characters curse when something surprising or bad happens, or when something unexpectedly good happens, when they’re angry, trying to be sexy, or they want to add that emphasis. That’s a lot of different situations where cursing can be useful and when you use “fuck” in your daily life a lot you become pretty desensitized to it. As said, for many it’s barely a curse at all. Which means that when you really want to curse you’ve got to up the ante. It doesn’t surprise me one bit that the two uses of “cunt” I can recall—a word that is generally considered far worse than “fuck” and makes a lot of people understandably uncomfortable—is used by two of the worst characters in moments that are meant to horrify the viewer:

Adam: “Can’t wait a whole year to slaughter those little cunts / I know it’s just been a week, but we’ll be back in six months!” Valentino: “When I say you’d better get that fucking cunt out of my studio, you say...?”

This horror is especially emphasized in Valentino’s scene. The creators know this word is coming up and deliberately build towards it. Angel is currently being abused and has been reminded that Valentino “owns” him. The above question is a part of a trio that Valentino asks (a standard structure in writing), wherein the third option is the outlier/most shocking of the three. The animation leans into that shock, with the music building and Valentino grabbing Angel to pull him close right on the word “cunt.” Perez even puts emphasis there because he knows that this is a significant word that will change our understanding of Valentino.

Despite having hit Angel multiple times and taunting him with the contract, this is the moment Valentino stops playing the ‘nice’ employer. This is the real him. No more fake compliments and endearments aimed at Charlie, no more fake comfort/intimacy aimed at Angel. That “cunt” conveys a hell of a lot about how Valentino really sees them and when you have a cast of characters who are already cursing on the regular, it takes a word on that level to do that kind of work. If Valentino had said, “get that fucking bitch out of my studio” it wouldn’t have had nearly the same impact because he’s the kind of guy who uses "bitch" even when playing ‘nice.’

Adam’s line from “Hell is Forever” does very similar work. The scene needs a word to align with the horrific reveal that another extermination is just six months away, that conveys Adam’s deep disgust for Charlie’s people, and that still catches the viewer’s attention even though he’s the character (I believe) who curses the most. Here the music drops and Adam is a little closer to speaking than singing; there's this shift because, like with Valentino, our perception of him is shifting. This isn’t just some egotistical idiot who wants to be called “Dick Master,” he’s the leader of an army coming to gleefully kill them. Framing a whole world of people—people Charlie loves—as “cunts” while treating their murder as a holiday that can’t come soon enough creates an, 'Oh shit. This guy is actually a threat' understanding that you can’t quite get with anything else.

On a smaller scale, cursing does other character work throughout the whole show. I watched a number of cursing compilation vids for this meta (that was a trip lol) and again, cursing is not thrown in randomly. Each character has a unique way of cursing that aligns with their personality and motivations:

As said, Adam curses the most in the show which helps sell his truly over-the-top, irreverent personality. Linguistically, the amount he curses also allows for some fun grammatical play. Lines like, “Fucking love putting my name on shit, shit’s the best!” help convey the versatility of cursing.

Also as said, Charlie curses a fair bit but she’s comparatively polite and her cursing tends to be a result of genuinely big emotions—like saying “Crap” when she’s shocked and falls, or “Shit!” when Adam locks her out of the room—rather than sprinkled into her conversations as a modifier. That leaves space to create those moments of amused surprise when Charlie really let’s loose.

Sr Pentious curses even less than Charlie which fits his secretly gooey center. He talks a big game at the start of the show, but he’s actually quite bad at being, well, bad (especially the Amazon version compared to pilot!Pentious). His idea of getting one over on Alastor is ripping a bit of his coat. He loves his Egg Bois and “doesn’t want to live” without them. He has no desire to go into battle without minions/a big machine to hide behind and, of course, he’s the first to be redeemed. He's too much of a secret sweetheart to curse a lot.

Interestingly, Niffty doesn’t seem to curse at all. At least, not enough for me to think of examples off the top of my head. Right now I’m inclined to read that as an extension of her lived experiences/design—the cute 1950’s housewife archetype who is obsessed with keeping things clean doesn’t [gasp!] curse—as well as a way to maintain her legitimate creep factor. As said, cursing is common among the hotel residents and is a way for them to linguistically fit in. Niffty, however, is positioned more as an outsider (despite how much they all obviously love her): she’s actually scary in a way most demons aren’t and despite how weird this whole world is, she stands out as someone no one else can make sense of (even Alastor). If cursing is normal, Niffty is a character who is decidedly positioned as not normal.

Angel curses a fair bit, though his irreverence is conveyed more through innuendos. Angel is great at verbally twisting others’ words (especially Husk’s) to give himself a conversational advantage:

Husk: “Go fuck yourself” Angel: “Only if you watch me~”

Husk: “You’ve come—” Angel: [very loud orgasm noise] Husk: “...to the right place.”

Meanwhile, Husk uses “fuck” plenty, but he’s also one of the few characters who use “bullshit" too. I wouldn’t say there’s anything particularly revealing about that choice, but just giving him a go-to curse that’s otherwise used infrequently helps make his character distinct in a cast of other cursing characters.

Vaggie occasionally curses in Spanish, showing us her heritage if she used to be human, or a distinct knowledge/verbal preference if she’s always been an angel.

Heaven, as the ‘good’ side, doesn’t curse as a general rule, which leaves room for cursing to do more of that silent character work. We’re reminded of the stuffy, overly critical beings she’s dealing with when Charlie receives the combined judgement of the court for saying, “Fuck yeah!” In contrast, we understand just how shocked St. Peter is to see a Morningstar when he lets out an unintentional “Fuck!” The angry vindication of Charlie’s “That’s what the fuck I’ve been saying!” lands harder after multiple scenes of very little cursing, and Lute’s “Some crack-whore who fucked up already? / He blew his shot like the cocks in his mouth—” helps set her apart as an exorcist + Adam's second in command: her shocking violence comes through in her word choice too; words that supposedly don't belong in Heaven.

In what’s arguably the funniest line in the whole show, Lucifer undermines his dramatic standoff with Adam by going, “You mess with my daughter and now I’m going to fuck you.” Beyond just cutting the tension, that fits his bumbling, oblivious personality perfectly. Lucifer is crazy powerful and can absolutely wreck Adam. He also has none of the classy intimidation that, say, Alastor displays when he tries to convey that. This is a depressed himbo who makes ducks in his free time and settles on, “Hey, bitch!” when greeting his estranged daughter. Of course he’s going to accidentally turn a threat into a promise of sex.

Which finally brings me to Alastor, someone whose cursing is already understood well by the fandom. He’s characterized as manipulatively courteous, using manners to both hide his true nature and draw attention to his power—’You’re so beneath me I’ll just calmly sip my coffee and politely ask who you are, despite the fact that we've fought multiple times.’ This is a guy who calls people “My dear” and unironically insults them with the phrase “wacky nonsense.” So when he curses you can BET it’s gonna have an impact. It sure did for me. I had to pause the episode after Alastor’s first “Fuck you” because it was so shocking to hear that language from him. And that’s the point! The scene wants that reaction from the audience. The "Fuck you"s visceral anger contrasting the fake laughs he and Lucifer have been giving, the quick-fire exchange that’s suddenly cut short by Alastor’s choice of a direct insult, the fact that he’s officially dropping the polite veneer they’ve both been indulging in and raising the stakes before Charlie intervenes, the loss of the radio filter that otherwise demonstrates his control over a situation... all of it screams, ‘THIS IS AN IMPORTANT CHARACTER MOMENT.’

"Fuck you” reveals that, for the first time in the show, Alastor is legitimately threatened by someone. Which makes sense given that, you know, Lucifer is the King of Hell. Cursing for Alastor isn’t normal, so when he does curse it’s going to reveal something about a guy who otherwise is obsessed with being unknowable. Having the King of Hell dismiss him is actually infuriating in a way Sir Pentious’ threats could never be and the exchange kicks off a rivalry that rattles Alastor in ways Vox’s never has. (Side note: is it any wonder people ship them? Character A making control freak Character B feel vulnerable is classic!) It’s no surprise to me than that the one other true curse we get from Alastor is, “I’m about to end your fucking life,” delivered to Adam who, like Lucifer, poses a legitimate threat and does end up beating him. I say “true” curse because calling Susan a “bitch” does similar work for him, but the takeaway is humorous rather than dramatic. It’s funny that the only people who can piss Alastor off enough to curse are the First Man/a powerful exorcist angel threatening his life, the literal King of Hell... and Susan.

So there’s a lot going on here, more than what many viewers might assume if they approach the show as just “stupid,” needlessly vulgar entertainment. As shown above, I don’t think the cursing is needless, especially given that, well... they’re in Hell. They’re sinners, supposedly the worst that humanity has to offer, so of course they're going to curse a lot. Does cursing mean you’re a bad person? No. Can you craft a hellish world that doesn't rely on cursing to convey a group's immoral nature? Sure.

Does it make sense that a writer would equate a sinful, irreverent cast with linguistic rebellion and would want to convey a certain vibe that, frankly, you just can’t get without dropping an F bomb?

Yeah, I think so. No one has to like that kind of creative decision, but it’s worth acknowledging it as a deliberate choice.

That’s all! Thanks for reading this fucking long post ✌️

[terribleinfluence-tour]

I will phrase this nicer than i did in my own blog, but please if some of you could be a little more patient with us around finding preshows and the quality of them.

The preshow i reblogged early was the first one i found when i woke up this morning and i didn’t listen to it i just posted it. I’m very sorry that the audio quality wasn’t up to standard HOWEVER this blog is an archive of all things tit related, that means we are archiving everything including ‘bad audios’ because it serves as part of the tours legacy.

I am forever grateful to anyone who has recorded any audio of the show and preshow and any videos of the preshow, and i think some of you should be grateful too because the people doing this don’t have to but they do!

I just want to give you guys an idea of my day during tour so you can understand why I can’t always post the best audio or a film video first thing in the day.

I work 40 hours a week, I am not currently in the right timezone, most of the things happening with tit right now are while i’m sleeping.

I currently wake up at 8am, i have a quick look through tumblr and twitter and i post whatever i find, i have 30 minutes to get ready for work in the morning and i genuinely spend 15 of that on this blog. I then go to work. sometimes throughout the day I will check to see if anything new has appeared (there’s normally about 2 audios and a video by then) I take a quick break from my job to post those and then i go back to work. When i finish work i check twitter and tumblr again and then I go through m&gs and i screenshot them all and post them, this takes a few hours. (sometimes peyton will do this and that’s very helpful) I then go to sleep and the cycle starts again.

Running this blog is literally a second job. It’s hard work and it takes up a lot of my time, the blog is nowhere near even at its potential yet, i have so many pages etc planned that i barely have time for.

I am trying my best, i love updating this blog and I am so committed to it. All i ask in return is a little patience and a little less condescension from some people.

I love you all!

Bethanie

[doodledrawsthings]

Hello, I'm currently in an art class and I'm taking storyboarding. I noticed that people draw their storyboards in VASTLY different ways. Some people draw it super rough and minimalistic while I've seen others with super fleshed out and cleaned panels that boggle my MIND. I remembered that you're an actual storyboarder in the industry so I wanted to ask which style tends to work better or is more is more popular among studios? Sorry if this question came out of nowhere :/

(Also I've recently been admiring how you do line art in your art in particular its very thin and clean :]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] )

It really depends on the project you’re working on. The boards I did at CN were allowed to be a lot more loose than the boards I did at Rough Draft.

In my opinion, boards should lean more on the loose side so as not to stress out the artist, but due to industry trends it seems like cleaner ones are becoming more and more common. Although I do think a lot of the time, the super clean boards you’ll stumble upon on Twitter would probably/ hopefully have gone through layout and revisions to make them look as clean as they do.

Based on what I learned, though, what I think matters most about boarding is clarity. Are the boards legible and is it easy to tell what’s going on, which characters are on screen, who’s talking, where they are, etc? Are things consistent or are you breaking 180 rule too much or trying to do too many complicated things where something simpler would be more efficient or effective? At CNS Academy I was told that I should judge how much time I put into drawings based on how important they are to the scene. (i.e. this close up or establishing shot is important to the tone of the scene and lasts a couple seconds longer than the very quick shot of the character speaking coming up next, so I will put more effort into making the former shot look nicer, because it’s more specific.)

Important to keep in mind no matter how loose or clean your boards are.

[npookie0]

Swimming With The Snake.

This was supposed to be an ask but I deleted it- I'm so so so sorry </3 Still posting it tho! :) Trigger warnings!

Ronin being himself.

Mentions of suffocating and drowning.

Hurt / Comfort

Anxiety

Have fun!!!

Water was keeping you in its embrace, comforting yet heavy.

You are currently in your swimming practice. You're a professional swimmer, ever since you were a child you loved the feeling of freedom that water gave you.

Now it wasn't your passion, it was an obligation. Something you had to do, something you had to be good at. And what would happen if you're not? You can as well be gone from the world. You're nothing without swimming, an useless human.

That are your thoughts, or more precisely, the thoughts that your coaches and parents pushed you into following.

You were made for swimming. You had to be fit. No fun, no friends. Nothing. Only you and the pool.

At least that's how your life looked until you met this weird mechanic.

You remembered this day like it was yesterday, you were driving home after another won competition, there wasn't any other feelings that exhaustion. Exhaustion from this life, from the routine you have going. Your life is an endless cycle; wake up, eat, swim, repeat. You hate it, yet you can't break it.

While you were lost in your thoughts, your car suddenly broke down, you cursed your breath.

"Just my luck."

You mumbled as you called the nearest mechanic to fix your car.

And that's how you met Ronin, a guy who's a walking definition of the word "edgy".

Somehow you were interesting enough for him to ask you for your number, at first you were unsure of accepting.

You accepted.

What's the worst that could happen? It's not like he's some sort of a serial killer like the Butcher, right?

After meeting Ronin, he would text you a lot, invite you for hang outs. At first you turned him down. You had to train. To work harder and harder every day. To get better, to earn more wins.

Well, your new friend stayed stubborn, he texted you, flooded you with invite after invite. You just had to agree.

And now, here you are. Standing in front of a cafe in one of the "nicer" outfits, it was your first friend hang out after all. You were nervously tapping your foot, you were supposed to prepare for a national competition, not wait for some guy who's just interested in you.

"Hey there swimmer."

Here he is. Ronin. A man so mysterious you don't even know his last name or anything besides the things he cared to share.

"Good to see you. You're worse than my coach you know?"

You said sarcastically. Somehow seeing another human who didn't tell you to swim as if your whole life depended on it felt good. Almost too good. It's like you were something more than just a swimmer, a human with your own thoughts and feelings.

"Oh, so a shitty coach hm?"

Even with that cocky grin, you could still see the dangerous look in his eyes. Like he had some wicked plans in his mind.

"You... could say that, yeah."

You sighed. Your coach is a terrible person, even worse than your parents. He pushed you too far, sometimes didn't let you take breaks. It was exhausting, you swore that it would kill you one day. You just had to wait for that day to arrive.

Weeks passed. The finals for one of your many competitions were getting closer every day,

Your relationship with Ronin was blooming into something more. He would pick you up from your practices, take you to his favourite places or just to hang out around the town. His mysterious aura kept you craving for more of him. He started to be the only thing on your mind, besides swimming.

Unfortunately, you had less and less time for the meeting. Your coach made sure to push you even further, keep you longer in the practices.

One of these days, when you were swimming for so long that your body felt even heavier in the water. Your body simply gave out.

Exhaustion, mixed with all the anxiety that you felt due to the pressure you were under, they won over with your abilities to swim.

You were drowning.

Trying your best to swim, making it only worse. The water got into your nose and mouth, slowly making its way to your lungs. the sensation was burning, there was ringing in your ears and sour tears mixed with water.

Your coach left for a smoke earlier. He wouldn't save you. Is this how your story ends?

Are you going to drown? Alone and unloved?

As your body grew heavier and heavier, suddenly strong arms were holding you, pushing you up.

You were placed on the cold tiles, your vision blurry, but you could make out the plum coloured hair that were dripping wet.

"For fuck's sake... Y/N I swear."

It was Ronin. He saved you. But why was he present at the pool? And what was this irony scent that came off of him.

"Don't even say anything. You... This asshole, if I knew that this is how hard he-"

You couldn't really understand what he was mumbling about. Your whole body was heavy, you were just so exhausted...

Ronin watched you as you fell asleep. He sighed, you were so exhausted, and this was the fuck's fault.

He wiped his blood stained hands into his shirt, so he could pick you up and take you home.

Oh yeah. Blood stained.

Ronin killed that asshole.

He was watching your every practice, seeing that asshole made his blood boil. He was the only thing that stopped Ronin from setting you free, from helping you find your best shape.

"Don't worry darlin', now you will be set free."

[sserpente]

A/N: Billy Hargrove and a mistletoe. There was no way I wasn’t going to write this.

Words: 1014 Warnings: mentions of bullying

The way to the kitchen was blocked. Well, not really. But there was someone leaning against the threshold that you, under all possible circumstances, whatsoever, were keen to avoid.

All you wanted was some more mulled wine. You’d need an awful lot more in order to get drunk on the hot beverage but you were determined and you were thirsty.

So get it together. High school is over! Mentally slapping yourself, you shook your head and fought yourself a way through the partying crowd in the hallway. Push past, don’t look him in the eye, ignore him, pretend you didn’t see him… it should have been easy. With your heart in your mouth, you turned sideways to fit through the door—a significantly hard task when two people were casually conversing right in its middle—until you were stopped by a strong arm stopping you from entering the kitchen like a bloody human barrier.

“Whoops.”

The nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach only intensified when he spoke up. He was taller than you, of course, looking down at you with an amused expression on his face. His outfit… not only was it unsuitable for the current weather conditions but also direly inappropriate for a Christmas party. And who wore a leather jacket without a shirt on anyway? And why did he have to be so shredded? You knew he worked out but Jesus H. Christ… up close, that six-pack looked even more defined. Why was it always the arseholes who were this attractive? Why couldn’t it be the nice guy next door, the one who took your mail in when you weren’t home?

No, it had to be Billy fucking Hargrove, your own personal high school bully who’d tried to make your life a living hell. Well… more or less. In fact, you were pretty certain he was the very reason you were still single. If Billy Hargrove told you not to date a girl… you didn’t. That’s just how Hawkins worked since the fucker moved here from sunny California.

“Let me through, Billy.”

“You didn’t follow the rules.”

You rolled your eyes. You had no idea what he was on about but you were already getting annoyed. Should have climbed through the bloody window instead.

“Seriously, all I want is some mulled wine. I won’t let my festive mood be spoiled today, least of all by my school bully.”

“Are you kidding me?” He added your name at the end, making you swallow. He never used your name. It’d only ever been nicknames—teasing nicknames that’d had you seethe. “I wasn’t bullying you.”

“Of course not. What else would you call it then, huh?”

“What, are you that daft? I wanted to get with you so bad the whole fucking school knew.”

You blinked. “Excuse me?”

“Oh yeah. You embarrassed me quite a bit, doll. You were the only girl at school who resisted my charms.”

“Charms is a strong word.” You didn’t believe him. Not a word. Or did you? You bit your lower lip. You’d seen him bully others. He’d gotten into physical fights more often than you could count. He’d never… insulted you either, just… teased you relentlessly? The closest you’d come to a physical attack had been when he’d knocked your books from your hands on Halloween. Come to think of it, he’d said the exact same word he’d said to you just now back then when—

“Whoops.” Billy’s shit-eating grin grew wider when you tried to slip past him again. Without any effort whatsoever, his arm came up to block your way yet again no matter how hard you pushed against him.

“Whatever. Should have treated me nicer then… if that was true.” But part of you couldn’t help but wonder… if it was. You thrust forward yet again, eager to escape the situation.

“A-ah. I’m afraid you’re still gonna have to follow the rules, doll.”

“What rules?” you spat, refraining from rolling your eyes at him. Billy smirked with his mouth slightly open, his gaze travelling up above your head. A fucking mistletoe. Of course.

“After all, it’s Christmas.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Why?” He grinned. “Are you afraid it could be…”—he leaned in closer, lowering his voice—“…good?”

“I have absolutely no desire—and I mean no desire—to kiss you.” And that was a fucking lie. You’d wondered often enough if he really was as good as the girls whispering about his many talents in the bedroom said he was.

He didn’t listen to you anyway because before you could turn away and flee, his lips were on yours. It wasn’t just a quick peck. Hell, you couldn’t pull away even if you wanted to. Billy wrapped his arms around you in an instant, his palms resting on your hips dangerously close to your bum, keeping you close. Much to your dismay… your eyes fell shut. The sucker knew what he was doing—and he made it so easy for you to kiss him back.

It was a combination of the cheering that got loud around you with a start and his tongue that teasingly slid against your bottom lip that made you break the kiss before it could escalate.

“Looks like she wasn’t immune to your charms, after all, Hargrove!”

You raised an eyebrow, bending back to create some distance between you. “You’re gonna have to do an awful lot more than kiss me underneath the mistletoe if you want to convince me.”

Billy grinned. “Shall we say eight, then? Tomorrow? There’s a nice restaurant just outside of Hawkins I’m sure you’ll love.”

You considered it for a moment. What could possibly go wrong? A, this could be a terrible prank. B, he could kidnap you and chop you to pieces in the woods, or C… he meant it. You sighed.

“Fine. Don’t make me regret this.”

“That’s what I’m talking about, baby. Wear something pretty. I’ll come pick you up.”

“Uh-huh.” You pushed past him again and this time, he let you through. Yeah. You definitely needed more mulled wine after this.

[joshenstein]

Can you tell us more about Penelope?? She’s soooo pretty I love her, what is she like personality wise?

SHES PRETTY BUT SHES MEEEAAAN !! SHES SOOOO MEAN …. SHE ONLY LIKES PEOPLE THAT FIT HER STANDARD OF “ ATTRACTIVE “ AND WILL BE SO CRUEL TO OTHERS THAT DONT . SHE KNOWS SHES CUTE AND THAT SHES ABLE TO GET AWAY WITH A LOT OF STUFF BECAUSE OF IT ( SHES ALSO GOOD AT MANIPULATING PEOPLE WITH PRETENDING SHES NICER THAN SHE ACTUALLY IS )

SHE LOVES CANDY ESPECIALLY GUMMY WORMS AND LOVES TO USE HER FUNNY FLIP PHONE

SHES A VERY GENERIC MEAN GIRL AT HER CORE . SHE THINKS SHES OWED EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING IF SHE WANTS IT , SHE BELIEVES EVERYONE EITHER IS IN LOVE WITH HER OR IF THEU DONT LIKE HER ITS CAUSE THEYRE JEALOUS , SHE USES PEOPLE AND WILL DROP THEM IF THEYRE NO LONGER USEFUL OR IF SHE FINDS SOMEONE “ BETTER “ , SHE WILL THREATEN TO KILL HERSELF AND OTHERS IF HER CURRENT BOYFRIEND TALKS TO OTHER GIRLS OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT . SHES ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO WILL LOSE THEIR SHIT IF THEIR PARTNER LOOKS AT THEM WRONG OR IF THEIR TONE SHIFTS , AND IF THEY EVEN DARE EVEN THINK OF BREAKING UP WITH THEM ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE !!! ( ONE OF MY FRIENDS OCS IS ONE OF HER EXES AND HE HAD TO FLEE FROM WHERE HE LIVED )

[alittlepudge-neverhurtnobody]

kinktober #21

Chained Up ⛓️ / Silky Soft 💕

One day, in another world not far off, unburdened by such things as “lease agreements” and “student loans,” Marcille and Falin will live closer together. They’ll have a dreamy little two-bed full of plants and terrariums and soft colors, and they’ll take turns cooking dinner and Marcille will volunteer far more often than it’s her turn because cooking is her favorite form of magic and she likes knowing that Falin is well-fed.  

But until then, she’s stuck rollerblading across town with a dozen eggs in her backpack, precariously padded by a t-shirt, boxers, sleep socks, and tomorrow’s clothes. The grocery store near Falin’s place isn’t as nice as the one near Marcille’s, and the eggs there are always either sold out or smashed in their cardboard nests, so she’s resorted to bringing her own if she really needs them. Falin won’t eat them on her own, but Marcille can hard-boil the rest while she bakes tonight and keep them in the work fridge for her lunch all week. Her job at the university library — well, that and Falin’s graduate courses — are what brought them together in the first place; Falin is in one of those fancy master’s programs where they pay you to study, which is great because studying is objectively what Falin’s best at. Marcille is a good librarian but a better researcher, but research doesn't pay the bills.

Falin's got an evening class tonight, so Marcille lets herself in with the spare key under the large ceramic frog on the front porch. When they’d found it at a yard sale, its paint was grayish-brown and flaking off, and Falin took it upon herself to repaint it with a startling degree of accuracy as a North American leopard frog. 

She throws the eggs in the fridge, peels off her pads, leggings, and hoodie, and takes a quick, brutal shower — Falin has the nicer apartment but the worse hot water system — before changing into her comfy clothes and hanging her skate clothes on the couple feet of clothesline she and Falin rigged on the tiny back porch to air out in the crisp October breeze. Then she ties up her wet hair and sets up shop in Falin’s galley kitchen, separating her eggs, zesting a lemon, and lining up the other ingredients with their corresponding measuring cups and spoons. 

She’s made plenty of chiffon cakes by now, and she falls into the rhythm of it as she bops along to the K-pop playing from her phone. While the cake bakes and the rest of her eggs boil, she starts on a whipped cream frosting and adds a packet of the instant vanilla pudding mix Falin keeps around for emergencies to stabilize it.

By the time Falin comes home, the cake is done and frosted and the boiled eggs are safely ensconced in an airtight container, and fortunately the kitchen smells a lot more like the former than the latter. “Surprise!” exclaims Marcille as Falin steps toward the kitchen, and Falin’s face lights with a grin. 

“I didn’t know you were coming so early! What’s the cake for? It looks amazing.”

“Special occasion,” beams Marcille. “Guess.”

“It’s not our anniversary,” says Falin, puzzled. “That’s not for another couple of weeks. What’s today?”

Marcille takes her in her arms and pulls her in close. Falin’s current favorite soap is somewhere between basil and mint, green and leafy, and Marcille thinks she always smells like a bright summer day. “A year ago today,” she says, the tip of her nose just brushing Falin’s, “we held hands for the first time.”

“Oh, my gosh,” says Falin, laughing. “On the boardwalk? When I kept falling over on my skates?”

“Yes,” says Marcille, twirling her around. “We did technically hold hands, because I had to keep you upright somehow. And we decided it was technically our first date later! So it counts!”

“It counts, it counts,” Falin agrees. “I just can’t believe you remembered what day that was.” She drops her backpack by the door and kicks off her brown loafers. Her navy slacks hug her plump legs, and her cream-colored sweater has caramel-colored suede patches sewn over the elbows. A slim headband holds her hair back from her face, and she looks so cute and textbook-scholarly that she’s hard to look at dead-on. “Let me change and then we can have cake?”

Marcille nods. “Did you have dinner?” she calls after Falin as she starts down the hall.

“Cake is dinner!” Falin yells back, and Marcille rolls her eyes affectionately. Not that she can really fault her. Falin’s learned by now that Marcille is clinically incapable of serving her just a single slice of cake, and Marcille has learned, to her profound dismay, that Falin is deep in the habit of forgetting about food when she could be doing school instead. Hence the emergency pudding packets, emergency instant mac and cheese cups, and emergency Pop-Tarts in the cabinet. Marcille has made it her mission to create a life for Falin where she doesn’t have to think about what she’s going to eat because Marcille has already thought about it for her and made it appear in front of her, but it would be a lot easier to do from the same apartment.

While Falin changes, she rinses some blackberries from the farmer’s market in the park nearby and sets them out in a dish, then gets out the sparkling wine she specifically planted in the back of Falin’s musty liquor-and-specimen-but-mostly-specimen cabinet a few weeks ago. Tonight has been in the works for months, not because Marcille feels especially strongly about celebrating minor dates, fun as that is, but because that day on the boardwalk, the two of them dissolving into giggles as Falin lost her balance over and over again, was the day she knew that what she felt for Falin was unlike what she’d felt for anyone else. She wanted to go over every bump in the road just like this for the rest of their lives, hand in hand and laughing. 

Falin appears in the doorway just as Marcille is pouring wine into plastic champagne flutes she’s had squirreled away behind the baking dishes for at least a month and a half. She looks resplendent in a white tank top that shows off her pillowy upper arms and incredible boobs and barely covers her wide, plush belly. Her lavender sleep shorts are patterned with little dragonflies and only fall to the tops of her plump, dimpled thighs, and Marcille can see every pink stretch mark, every delicate fold on her soft, creamy skin. 

“The wine!” says Falin, pointing, and Marcille yelps as she realizes she’s pouring sparkling rosé all over the table.

“Shit! Ah!” She sets down the wine and dives for paper towels, and Falin grabs the dishtowel from the hook by the sink. 

“Well, at least it was cheap wine,” says Marcille, mopping up the spill and tossing the sopping paper towels into the trash. “Sorry, I was momentarily blinded by your beauty.”

Falin beams and does a little curtsy thing with the edges of her shorts. None of these clothes are new, they’re things Marcille has seen her wear a thousand times, but they still take her breath away. The way the shorts tug around the abundant curves of her hips and backside, the little hint of stretch-marked cleavage she can see above the dip of her tank top’s neckline, the way the fabric clings just enough for her to see each roll of Falin’s ample belly when she sits —

“Sit, sit!” says Marcille, scooting the less-full glass in front of Falin and heading back to the kitchen for the cake. “And you’d better eat some blackberries, too, so we can agree that this is a multi-food group meal.”

“Already on it!”

“Good.” Feeling grand despite her new-hire orientation university t-shirt, boxers from the men’s section, and slouchy socks, she carries out the cake and sets it triumphantly in the center of their little folding table. “Voilà!” she proclaims, and Falin gives her a smattering of light applause.

“Thank you, thank you,” she says, taking a bow before ducking back to the kitchen for the cake knife. “All right, say when.”

She makes the first cut into the cake, then moves her knife to signify a larger and larger hypothetical slice.

“Yes,” says Falin blithely when the knife has moved to about a quarter of the way around the cake. Marcille almost drops the knife.

“Really?”

“Sure,” says Falin with an angelic smile. “I didn’t eat dinner. I had a Pop-Tart for lunch. Why not?”

“I packed you lunch!”

Falin shrugs. “I ate it when I got up this morning. I didn’t feel like making something else.”

“I swear to god,” says Marcille, pointing a fork at her playfully. “One of these days I am going to get you eating three meals a day.”

Falin flutters her eyelashes — clumsily, which is all the more endearing. “Please! I would love three meals a day. I just don’t want to make them.”

Marcille grumbles good-naturedly and heaves Falin’s quarter of the cake onto her plate. “Thank you!” Falin chirps, sprinkling blackberries over it. 

She cuts herself a slice and waits for Falin to take a bite, and she isn’t disappointed when she does. Falin’s eyes flutter closed, and she makes a soft, tender sound that kick Marcille’s feet out from under her, even sitting down. 

“Oh, Marcille,” Falin breathes. “This is so, so good.”

Marcille beams. “Good! The way you looked when you tasted it is the way you make me feel.”

“How did I look?”

Marcille makes what must be a poor approximation of Falin’s pleasure, because Falin bursts out laughing. “Is that how I make you feel?”

“Listen!” yelps Marcille, but she can’t help laughing too. “Just take my word for it, okay? You made a really cute face!”

“Well, you made a really good cake,” Falin returns, taking a tiny sip of sparkling wine. “Oh, that’s nice! Fruity.”

“You’re nice and fruity.”

Falin wrinkles her nose in a laugh, but the gesture is interrupted by a hiccup. “So are you, but you’re easier to swallow.”

Clearly Falin did skip some meals today, because she finishes her chunk of cake in record time and pushes her empty plate back to Marcille. “A little more, please?” she says sweetly, and obviously Marcille says yes.

“Another quarter, or a … half of a quarter?”

“That’s an eighth,” Falin corrects. “But maybe another quarter. I kind of like the idea of eating half a cake. It sounds like it should be hyperbole.”

Marcille, unable to help herself, says, “You sound like you should be hyperbole.”

“Yes,” says Falin, palming her belly where it bumps the edge of the table, “I am subject to amplification, it’s true.”

She grins while Marcille makes disgruntled noises and plates her second piece of cake. Falin takes more blackberries, and she hiccups again when she takes another sip of wine. She tells Marcille how her classes went today, and Marcille tells her about the silent drama two students have been waging by taking out and returning the same novel with notes in it over and over again. 

Finally, Falin sets her fork on her empty plate and leans back in her seat, eyes closing happily. “That was so good, Marcille. Thank you.”

“Any time,” says Marcille, coming around to take her plate and drop a surprise kiss on her cheek. “Always. Did you have enough?”

Falin nods, resting her hands on the crest of her belly. “Mmm-hmmm.”

“I’ll wrap up the rest of the cake,” says Marcille, stroking through Falin’s hair. “You go get comfy in bed and we can cuddle for a bit?”

“I’d love that,” says Falin, stretching her arms over her head. One hand on the cake plate, Marcille reaches down with the other to jiggle the soft, perfect roll of belly that falls out from beneath her shirt.

“Sorry, couldn’t help it!” she says, dancing away as Falin laughs and grabs for her hand. “Go to bed! I’ll be right there!”

She wraps the cake at the speed of light and swallows the last of her wine, then practically sprints across the small apartment to Falin’s bedroom. Falin’s propped up on a couple of pillows, which is probably prudent given the amount of cake she just ate, and she looks so lovely, like it’s unfathomable that someone could have even invented the word lovely without first seeing her. 

Marcille dives into bed next to her, jostling the mattress enough to make Falin’s body jiggle. “Hi,” she says, brushing her flyaways out of her face. Falin laughs and cups Marcille’s face in one soft, warm hand.

“Hi,” she says. “Come here.”

Marcille cuddles up next to her and leans her head on Falin’s shoulder, one hand creeping under her white tank top. Her belly is so perfectly doughy, soft and springy like the beginnings of bread or buns, and Marcille wobbles gently as she lies against her, breathing in her fresh, green smell and scalp prickling as Falin strokes her hair.

She slips her hand just below the line of Falin’s sensible cotton underwear, where there’s the silkiest slip of skin Marcille has ever had the mind-melting pleasure of running her fingertips over. She sighs gently, and Falin’s body moves with a laugh.

“Did you find the spot?”

“Yeah,” says Marcille dreamily. She runs her hand down Falin’s thigh, carefully squishing the thick, dimpled fat at their backs, then walking her hand back up so she can start again. “Your body’s so good. I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” says Falin, pulling one of Marcille’s hands up to kiss the back. “I love that you remembered which day we first held hands. That was a really nice day.”

“Yeah, it was.” Marcille idly plays with the soft flab of Falin’s upper arms. “I could have sat at that little ice cream shack with you forever.”

Falin nods. “I barely even noticed how cold it was because I was having so much fun with you.”

Marcille nuzzles her face into Falin’s arm. “You were the one who suggested ice cream!”

“It’s never too cold for ice cream!”

“Okay, okay, fair.” Marcille rubs her socked feet against each other, trying to warm them up a little. “Hey, I know there’s still a while before your lease renews, but —”

“But you want to move in?” asks Falin, eyes bright, and Marcille nods.

“I know we sort of talked about it a few times, but I didn’t want to —”

“Yes!” says Falin, sitting up a little straighter. “Yes, yes. Even if I have to pack everything up and find somewhere new, I want you to be with me.”

Marcille feels like that bottle of sparkling wine, thrilling and fizzing with pleasure. “Perfect,” she says, snuggling close to Falin. “I can’t wait.”

[jujumin-translates]

★ Main Story | Act 13 - Budding Spring | Chapter 10 - Forced to the Starting Gate

Itaru: (I think it’s about time to head out… ah, right.)

Itaru: (Now that I’ve got a rough idea of our performance schedule, I’d better apply for paid leave before I forget.)

Boss: Chigasaki-kun, may I borrow you for fifteen minutes?

Itaru: --Of course.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Boss: It appears you’re all here.

Itaru: (Looks like there’s a few of my colleagues… and a handful of younger guys too.)

Boss: I called you all here to ask if you’d be interested in participating in an urban development project that our company is currently working on.

Boss: The project itself is already in its final stages, so what we’d like from you is to provide support in the form of an induction course.

Itaru: (So this is that large-scale overseas urban development project. The one about creating a theater establishment and developing the surrounding area to be a center of arts and culture…)

Itaru: (I checked out the outline since it was related to theater and sounded interesting.)

Boss: It’s not mandatory, of course. It would just be something to do alongside your current jobs.

Boss: That said… there is a reason you all were chosen specifically.

Boss: As individuals who are important to the company’s future, I truly hope you consider becoming core members of this next project.

Itaru: (Eight racehorses competing in the promotion race line up at the gate. Favored to win is Communication Skills Demon, but My Parents Are Absolutely Loaded is also attracting quite a lot of attention.)

Coworker A: I’ll do my best to meet your expectations.

Coworker B: I’ve been interested in this project for quite some time now, so I’m honored to be part of it!

Itaru: (The gate has opened and both of the favored horses have taken off running.)

Coworker C: Considering the state of my current workload, I should be able to participate in the induction course.

Itaru: I… sorry, can I have a little more time to think about it?

Itaru: (If it weren’t for the timing, I probably would’ve been all in, but…)

Itaru: (Honestly, I’m so busy with the troupe and the Fleur Award right now that I just don’t have time to think about anything else.)

Boss: …Ah, because you have your own theater company to worry about, right, Chigasaki-kun? Please do consider it based on your schedule with that in mind.

Boss: However, the theme of this urban development project is the arts, which is why the other team members were really hoping to work with you, Chigasaki-kun.

Coworker A: …

Itaru: I thank them for considering me.

Boss: I’ll set up another opportunity at a later date to explain more on what the induction course entails and to introduce the project’s team members. I hope to see you there.

Itaru: I will seriously consider it.

*Door closes*

Itaru: …

Coworker B: He seriously can’t just say he’ll consider it and then refuse.

Coworker C: Must be nice being in a position where you can just quit the company if worse comes to worst.

Coworker A: Well, it is a popular theater company, and the fact that it’s generally well-known definitely doesn’t make it any easier for the company to deal with him.

Itaru: …

Itaru: (If you’re gonna say it, at least do it behind my back.)

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Chikage: I’m so sorry, but my hands are full at the moment.

Company Employee A: I see. I apologize for dropping it on you so suddenly.

Chikage: Let me know if there’s anything else I can help you with.

Itaru: …

Itaru: Wanna head somewhere a little nicer, Senpai?

Chikage: …I don’t even want to try and guess where that might be, but go on.

Itaru: The hell is that supposed to mean?

Chikage: Haah, I suppose I can’t say no. I’ll go with you.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

*Punching SFX*

Itaru: Start by cheesing it and then follow that up with a double finishing move and K.O.! Man, is there any greater high than this?

Chikage: If you’re going to try and hide the way you actually feel, do it a little better.

Itaru: …Ughh, this is so stupid. Why can’t it just be the people who actually wanna be part of the promotion race at the starting gate?

Itaru: I mean, they should dip if they don’t wanna do it. Directing hate at me isn’t gonna go anything.

Itaru: There’s supposed to be a fine line between noobs like them and a mid-tierer like me. Why is it that the more of a mid-ranker you are, the less human rights you get?

Chikage: There aren’t really that many mid-level people to begin with.

Itaru: The company knows what to expect from the “Elite Chigasaki-san”. That’s why they’re hiring guys fresh out of college to steadily raise them into the perfect corporate slaves.

Itaru: I get why my colleagues are so desperate to advance their careers by using their outer appearances and mild manners to do so.

Itaru: From their point of view, it’s gotta be infuriating to see a guy who acts so carelessly while chasing after both theater and a career.

Itaru: And hit ‘em with a triple combo finisher-- But I’m just trying to figure out where I stand, so just eff off.

Itaru: Must be nice for you, Senpai. You go overseas a lot and get to level up your career stats in the least complicated way possible.

Itaru: And the things people say about you aren’t nearly as harsh, either.

Itaru: Me, on the other hand, I’m just stuck being the “can-do guy” who does a little better than decent work around the office.

Itaru: At the end of the day, I’m just a mediocre handyman at best.

Itaru: Even if I’m not being treated like the favorite, I still don’t slack off with my work. I may not be the most motivated, but I’d like to think I’m still doing everything I’m supposed to.

Chikage: You sure move your mouth and your hands a lot.

Itaru: What am I even trying to do in the first place?

Itaru: Should I sell my soul and become a corporate slave like you, and aim so high that no one can ever possibly complain about me not being good enough, or should I try and attain a rank that’s purely “Itaru Chigasaki”?

Chikage: Dad jokes and pro-level dodging techniques, huh? (1)

Chikage: Anyway, shouldn’t your first step be thinking about what you want for yourself?

Itaru: What I want… Well, I guess just to maintain the status quo so I don’t have to deal with everyone’s complaints about me… No, actually, maybe I want to speedrun my way to early retirement with passive income…?

Chikage: Then stop spending money on pulls and start investing.

Itaru: Absolutely not.

Itaru: …I originally chose this job based on the benefits and was lucky enough just to get in, so it’s not like I have any real desire to climb the corporate ladder.

Itaru: Most of the troupe have more than one thing on their hand, but they all have dreams and love what they do.

Itaru: And then there’s me who’s job is just a source of income. I feel like I really don’t have a whole lot to bring back to the troupe.

Itaru: It’s an important time for Spring Troupe to compete, and here I am getting caught up in a promotion race while all my coworkers talk behind my back.

Chikage: So you’re in a position where your hobby is more useful to the troupe.

Itaru: Exactly. To be honest, I wonder if there’s even any point in me continuing to be an office worker, but I don’t have the backbone or the self-confidence to just quit and do theater as my full-time job.

Itaru: Basically, I just wanna have something to fall back on.

Itaru: Ugh~, who would’ve thought I’d still be having these kinds of student problems even now… You ever think about this kinda stuff, Senpai?

Chikage: Well… there’s a variety of upsides to my job.

Itaru: A variety?

Chikage: A variety.

Itaru: Oh, okay. By all means, don’t elaborate or anything.

Chikage: No matter where you are, there are always two sides to things. There’s the side where you’re appreciated and the side where you’re disrespected. It’s not just you.

Chikage: The same goes for me, just with a different set of people. I guess I’m just glad to even be able to do theater activities in the first place.

Itaru: But if we’re actually nominated for the Fleur Award this time around, I doubt the company’s gonna be too eager to accommodate for that.

Chikage: Well, the company does have a performance-based evaluation system. If you can’t contribute to improving the company’s image, you’ll be told you need to be giving your work your undivided attention.

Chikage: At any rate, that doesn’t change the fact that we need the results of our next performance to be good too.

Itaru: I guess you’re ri… Hell yeah, I win! Haaah, I feel better now.

Itaru: Oh, right, didn’t you get asked to do something annoying too, Senpai?

Chikage: Ah… I was asked to accompany a client on an overseas business trip as an interpreter, but I had to decline because I just don’t have the time for that right now.

Itaru: Guess even cheaters like you have it hard sometimes. But y’know, I’m sure there’s tons of people who would kill to have the opportunity to do some sightseeing while all you have to do is be an interpreter.

Chikage: Well, it’s not to a country that I particularly want to go to.

Itaru: But you know the language, don’t you?

Chikage: I guess.

Itaru: Yeah, okay, we get it, you’re cheater.

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] • [ Next Part ⇢ ]

• • •

T/N:

(1) Itaru says “役職 『茅ヶ崎至』 に至る” (yakushoku “chigasaki itaru” ni itaru), literally “Attain the position of “Itaru Chigasaki”. The joke is that the verb “to attain” (至る; itaru) and Itaru’s name are the same kanji and have the same pronunciation, hence why Chikage mentions dad jokes.

[drawcupidsbow]

Hi i made a post on instagram about the top five games i played for the first time this year and thought id share it here! none of these are in any particular order. except the last one. my favorit....

first up is oneshot! it took me wayyyy too long to play this game. oneshot feels kinda like one of the staple rpg maker games, yet i went into it pretty much completely blind, "finished it" in one sitting, found out there was over half the game left, played the rest, and cried real hard. such a good game that breaks the fourth wall in really interesting ways. and also it has niko who doesnt love little fella niko

♡

second is halope! this is a game i had never heard of before my friend ángel (@raccoonlover333) told me to play it and i feel like i still dont really see people talk about it? it has a very unique style i think and each of the areas have their own atmosphere and feel to them (aside from the fact that all of them have distinct color palettes lol). very lovely game i enjoyed it a lot. also one of the first times i played a game with multiple endings and felt satisfied not going out of my way getting any i missed ? i enjoyed what it had to offer and didnt feel the need to pry for more (good thing)

♡

hard shift from story based rpgmaker games but next is webfishing. webfishing is good. its so good youve probably heard a lot of people say this by now but its just so fun and calming to sit around with friends and fish for hours. theres something special about the kinds of online games where theres a physical space you share with people, especially those you havent met in person. makes you feel like youre there with them. and also you can get a man i love fishing shirt whats not to love

♡

o yea baby farming sim. this game is so charming and has a lot of quality of life features that i feel are missed in other farming sims. it is still in early access so i cant be too harsh on it, but i will admit that the characters feel a bit too flat currently. a lot of nothing burger dialogue which isnt always a bad thing but when 20 characters tell you Hey this weather huh? must be good for farming! its hard to differentiate their personalities in your mind lol. im sure thatll be added to in the future though like i said its still ea and only has enough content to last you about a year in game. what it does have is very fun though and i would recommend it

♡

You knew it was coming be honest. where do i even start. technically i Did play isat for the first time last year, however, it was for like one hour and then i didnt pick it up again for half a year. so it counts to me. and also i take any excuse i can to talk about this game

in stars and time is a game that portrays characters and relationships in such a realistic light to a degree ive never seen in any other game. it makes it so easy to immediately become attached to this group of friends despite knowing them for less than ten minutes. its a very emotion heavy game. and who can forget the time loop Ohhh yes the time loop. siffrins slow decent into hopelessness and anguish after failing to escape time and time again is something rarely shown in time loop media i feel. at least to this degree. madoka magica comes pretty damn close though lol. also looping in time and zoning out through dialogue (and doing so having consequences) is such a cool game mechanic

while im talking about isat im slipping its prequel game in too, start again start again start again a prologue (or just start again). this one, though much shorter and more of a proof of concept, feels much more harrowing in the ways it pulls it off, especially without a certain characters presence. but i wont say more than that as to not spoil it teehee

this game changed my life for the better. and has been causing me psychic damage every day for 8 months. heart ♡

♡

and thats some of my favorite games i played this year! there were more but not enough for it to be 10 and 5 was a nicer number than like 7 lol. happy new year! i hope this year treats you all well and i cant wait to draw one million fanarts as i have been doing for the past 5 years. Yayyy

[mechanicalriddle]

My journals are liable to be a little barebones this year since I have been extremely busy for the past 2 months lmao.

To my dear and WONDERFUL Exalted Secret Santa....

Hirudana Siithavari- Current Gunstar Autochthonia PC, Worm of my heart (also brain)

If you're not in the know about the 2e Gunstar Autochthonia shard, everyone lives in Autochthonia and its a lot nicer than regular Autochthonia but also its in space and also the Yozis are chasing you 100% of the time. We've got it sort of star trek vibes but a little grungier and a tad diesel/rustpunk.

Siithi (32 y.o., she/her, 5'6") is a dipshit No Moon necromancer. She's a bit of a golden-hearted asshole, and while quite capable of taking things seriously, she also loves acting like a complete hooligan. Unfortunately lately she hasn't really been acting herself lately on account of she is maybe a little bit stressed out.

Her main character arc so far has been overcoming her own insecurities to come into her own as a powerful Chosen. Now she is finally getting the hang of it, but also currently dealing with like 4 different parties all vying for her allegiance (a number of whom are literally inside her head), trying to unlock the secrets of necromancy while being the Deliberative's first and only practicioner (with no formal training in anything involved), and slowly drifting away from her best friend, the dragon-king Meteor-Dream, who has formed a maligned pact with the Viator of Nullspace and lost most semblances of "humanity" that they had left. So shes basically pretty cranky, and not getting a lot of sleep. She finds working with her hands to be very therapeutic, so she's mostly trying to keep busy to forget about it.

This is working as well as one would expect.

She's blessed with the ugly bastard's confidence, and usually sporting either severe RBF, a wide & wry grin, or something smugly between. Sort of a slouching creeper. She emotes exaggeratedly and has a little bit of natural rubberhose stretchiness, plus a very minimal concept of personal space.

Motifs- The colors of chemicals, grime, and industrial decay (rust-red and algae green, ochre, dusty grays, various shades of black and brown) paired with the bright hues of warning. Rustpunk machinery chic, gears and bits and bobs. Black leather, vinyl, and latex, with silver studs and hardware. Machines that hiss and undulate. Mysterious stains, diaphonized specimens, sludge, slime, small skittering and squirming vermin.

Anima- Siithi's iconic anima is a moonlit mangrove swamp except the water is oil and the trees are made of steel and pulsating tubes and the moon is really really huge and reflective, also she is suspended over the surface of the water by a bunch of tubes connected to her back because thats fun. Her glowing/burning anima is pretty much like the regular Lunar anima except that its kind of gloopy and flows like wax in a lava lamp.

Her spirit shape is the Asian Buffalo Leech (Hirudinaria manillensis). Feel free to draw either her human or hybrid form.

Ideas (I like to put in a list of these in case you wanted to draw a little scene but arent sure what to do; feel free to ignore them completely)-

She's a bit of a gearhead, so you could draw her peeling an engine apart, covered in oil

Or disassembling a rotted corpse on a steel table with a bonesaw, covered in blood

Ruefully drinking coffee out of a go mug, or nursing a glass of dark-colored liquor on the rocks at a sci fi dive bar

Smoking weeeeeed

Notes- She is very much musclefat. Please don't omit details relating to this like her double chin, rolls, etc. She has a couple hairstyles listed in her references (take your pick), and sometimes has sparse facial hair which you can choose to include or not.

Cynis Niraj- Traitorous Twink of the Realm

(most of my art of this guy is either like 5 years out of date and/or trapped on my former PC, so hopefully these give you enough to work off of. he doesn't really have a signature outfit so you can have some fun with it!)

Niraj (21 y.o., he/him, 5'8") is a little water aspected bastard boy I held close to my chest for a very long time; he happens to be probably the most important Ledaal Tedeo backstory character (besties+magic college roommates, also Niraj has been dutifully covering Ted's tracks to try to prevent him from being detected by his Realm detractors).

He is sort of on track to be Cynis's next spymaster because while he may be a sorcerer he has all the sneaky bastard manipulator spells... infallible messenger control, corrupted words, silent dreams etc etc. More damningly he is the present wielder of Calumny (spoilers). A large proportion of his time at the Heptagram was spent cultivating his ability to lie and diplomacy his way out of anything, and the rest was of course spent doing... You know. Sorcery. Has the capacity to self reflect to some degree (e.g. why he didn't spurn his best friend completely right off the bat and has been reassessing his loyalties to the Realm as a result) but he's also a nervous animal who wants nothing more than to seek comfort in the familiar. Probably not the worst guy in the world but he is a rich kid, full stop.

Niraj carries a constant level of tension well beyond his years (it happens when you're lying thru your teeth on the daily to essence 5 shikari on behalf of your pet solar). Lately his anxiety has been much more difficult to hide. His outbursts are snide and a little temperamental but usually all hot air. The poor devil hasn't put on a genuine smile much in the past decade.

Motifs- Eels and various other toothy fish. Thick smoke and clouds of incense. Orchid and lotus flowers, draping vines, tobacco & potpourri, and general floral motifs. Dark-stained wood and leather. The night, and deep water. Dark, rich, luxurious garbs and tapestries; comfort over looks over practicality. The colors of his house, and of affluence.

Anima- Dark underwater cavern with toothy formations; deeper in the cave you can see dark shapes swimming in hypnotic patterns. Also, he has a little red lantern hanging over his head like an anglerfish lure.

Ideas-

Miserable in the bath. SFW only as per the rules of the event. Maybe he's in a nice bubbly bath. Or maybe he's bathing fully clothed.

Or simply laying facedown in an estate fountain. Not really his best angle, though.

Sitting in a dark room, forging a correspondence by candlelight.

Looking contemplative and/or nervous on the prow of a boat.

Also smoking weeeeeed or hookah

Notes-

I would say make sure his skin tone is accurate and also hes got magic top scars (depicted) in case you do choose the bath option or have him with his shirt slightly open all sexy or something. IDK

Keeping most of my other OCs on reserve this year. Have fun with one of these little freaks.

[beavauna]

Carmine Discussion

Okay, I’ve never done this before, but considering there are a lot of Carmine haters on here, I thought I’d give it a try.

I’m getting sick of going online and seeing Carmine portrayed negatively. There’s people calling her racist, sexist, xenophobic, and all around other horrifying things. It’s like I can’t go anywhere without seeing her drawn in a negative lot, and there’s even porn art where she’s portrayed like this, and I thought it’s time someone put a stop to it. (which I stumbled into on accident.)

Look, I get she’s supposed to be protective older sibling character, but people keep treating her like she’s not a character, like a puppet they can throw their problems on.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Bea.” But I do. There have only be three known sibling groups in Pokemon, Carmine and Kieran being one of them.

The best example I can give is Clemont and Bonnie. They’re brother and sister, and of course- they have their issues. Clemont is the older, protective sibling character, while Bonnie is the younger sibling who just wants to be trainer, but is often followed by her brother who wants to protect her and keep her safe.

I get Clemont’s nicer than Carmine is initially, but I’ve NEVER seen any hateful art drawn of him. It could be just because of how popular XYZ was, but like-

There should be people who portray him negatively, but I’ve never seen that.

The XYZ anime was great. Most people consider it the greatest Pokemon series of all time, with all its characters, story, Pokemon, (coughs. Amourshipping.) and much, much more.

If you ask someone, they’ll most likely tell you that their favorite anime is XYZ. And it’s the same with me.

(I’d like to mention I’ve never watched the anime where May and Max came from. I don’t even know the name- shsjsvsh. I’m not forgetting about them, I just have never watched it.)

But my point is; It’s like people automatically think that Carmine was supposed to be the Clemont character and Kieran was supposed to be the Bonnie character.

“Oh my god she’s so mean to Kieran. She doesn’t give a shit about him.”

Because older siblings are like that?? I’m an older sibling to a (currently) 7 year old brother, and our relationship is like this.

When people first saw Carmine, people were in absolute awe of her design. There was fanart galore, discussions, ext ext.

But when the game officially came out, here came the hate.

And to be honest? I hated her too, but after playing the Teal Mask for a while, I started to like her. She reminded me of myself in a way. (Despite me being transmasculine/nonbinary) And for the love of her design to immediately go to ‘hey let’s make awful art of her’ makes me sick.

She’s honestly my favorite comfort character. She makes me happy.

And I know there’s awful art of characters in every fandom, but my point is: Why hate on Carmine when she’s simply just the living example of an actual sister and brother relationship? People can change, you know. Like goddamn…

She can go through changes. Plot exists for a reason. Like- can people actually get their act together and realize things aren’t so fucking black and white??

That being said; If you’re a Carmine hater, block me and move on. If you’re a Carmine hater but understand what I’m getting at, feel free to stay around! I’m always happy to spread the word and remove one of my favorite video game characters from a negative light.

~ Bea

[object-vault-9]

Question I have about the vault itself, do you have an idea of what it looks like? The whole interior layout and everything? I've been wondering for some time now...

Ohh I should really sit down in a map maker and put it together ! A lot of the inspiration for the layout comes from Vault 101 and Vault 76 in the fallout games, plus a huge agricultural inspiration is from Vault 33 This is gonna be long and have pictures from the games/show/my comic/etc so it'll be under a break, might include some rambling about the way the vault used to operate too ! Very rambly/unorganized for now

Vault 9 is built into a cliff face, and behind it is a mountain range.

The vault was built for much more people that currently live there, and large portions of it are ominously empty. You can genuinely get lost in there, even Timer/Shovel/Mousetrap can even get turned around in there and they were born and raised there. Had Car Key survived he was intended to be the one that knew the layout almost perfectly, being the head security officer (and lone survivor of the security teams prior to the opening of the vault). If I were to draw less visited parts of the vault, portions of it would be roped off. The largest open areas in the vault are the farm (above) and the cafeteria

Vault 9's structure and culture when established was less individual, there were not a lot of rec rooms, rooms were all bunks to hold multiple people, etc. A lot of stuff involves some degree of depersonalization, etc. So thats why despite there being so many empty rooms presumably, most characters are shown to share rooms when their rooms are shown. Lcukily, especially with a colorful cast of characters from different backgrounds and over a century past its establishment, people are more encouraged to be themselves here There's a few rooms set aside for professions, there's the clinic, plus a larger room beside it for long term patients, though with the small population Mousetrap keeps people close to better monitor them There are classrooms, pretty much always empty, Spade/Shovel/Timer/etc are among the last to "graduate", and school years were not hosted every year due to the diminishing amount of people being born. So while Timer is a little older than Spade and Shovel, and Push Pin was a little younger, they likely all attended the same "grades/classes" together. Usually the family will teach basics (basic math/reading/writing) before the official vault curriculum, with classes starting for older students (like 10+) instead of starting at kindergarten

The intention of Vault 9 was mostly on self sustaining populations, so most people were intended to be involved with the care of the farm over anything else. Other roles were security/education/medical/culinary/etc, as well as leadership roles like a peoples court and the overseer The armory is very small and depleted/half destroyed, and there is only one or two quarantine/prison rooms

The floor structure is built in a way that the further down you go, the less likely you need to be there, this is my vague idea of it but with floor plans some things might be rearranged The surface level is only the door, airlock and door controls. Some storage is kept up there too Second floor down/B2 is the largest area. Farm, cafeteria, public rooms, clinic, classrooms, etc. There's a small library Third floor/B3 down are the living quarters, as well as the overseers office, peoples court, and locker rooms for showering and stuff. The overseers office is the best furnished room in the vault, and it had personal living quarters for the overseers family that were nicer too Fourth floor/B4 are guard armory/small training room/most storage/certain aspects of vault maint, etc. Fifth/B5 is storage and machinery for the most part. The boiler/furnace/etc, there's also a work shop down there and where Hehe/Apricot/CoG hang out. There's also the columbarium and morgue down there

Lowest level, heavy clearance, is where the power is. It's still nuclear power, the intention is to keep it buried so a failure might destroy the vault but cause less damage on the surface

I'll revisit this soon and have drawings and floorplans hopefully

[colourful-void]

alright closing umineko for the night!! i had a great time with it so far!! i really like the writing style, and for the most part its actually a lot less dense than i was expecting. I thought it might be some house of leaves stuff but no this is pretty easy to read, at least so far! im rlly glad for that like it doesn't feel too simple, not too complicated, its good!

current character thoughts run down, though i've barely started so i dont know much yet: ginzo: he sucks he totally sucks and im convinced that he made some kidna deal w/ beatrice in order to take advantage of the earthquake and war and such. not entirely convinced hes not about to just murder the whole family bcs he seems like he would do that. krauss: also sucks. just a real dick, but in like. he's a standard asshole really. natsuhi: much in the same vien, but she's got that matriach of the family thing going on i hope will b explored more <3 jessica: she's neat i like her! looking forward to more on her. Eva: i was digging for her a while and then i saw how she treated shannon and it went out the window hideyoshi: ive yet to expirence a thought on this man George: he's very tropey in a good way and i enjoy he's friendly guy swag. looking forward to it inevitably falling to pieces rudolf: DICK!! kyrie: girl leave your husband. i can treat u better <3, im glad she has some decency but my mind aint set on her yet battler: HES SO CRINGEEEE <333333333333333333333333333333333333333333 sometimes he does genuinely offput me but mostly he's just stupid <3 rosa: be a bit nicer to ur daughter, but beyond that shes chill i think. no big thoughts here. i do like her dynamic in relation to the rest of the siblings so far maria: MARIA MY DARLING MY DEAREST SHES SO SWEET AND SILLY AND CLEARLY OMINOUS I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT DARK MAGICS OVERTAKE HER OR WHATEVER <333 maria for whatever the fuck she wants 2024 love her so much no crazy thoughts on the head butler or doctor but i think in a different world the butler and ginzo had crazy gay sex shannon: shes soooo sweetie <3 suspiciously so this game wants me to like her so bad and i do <3. i am aware of one key spoilery fact about shannon uncovered in some content warnings i recieved, but its kinda fun seeing the set up for that! everyone be nicer to my girl kanon: hes suspcious but overly so and i wonder what his deal is. i also think all the servants need to be treated better this fucking furnature stuff <3 its awful i love it narratively gohda: i think he would kill someone with very little hesitation. i wanna try that panna cotta. kumasawa: shes like a grandma to me <333 i like her!!

i havent met beatrice yet but im looking forward to it she looks super neat.

i also apperciate how slow burn this is, a few hours in and very little has happened yet it's nice. there's already a lot building but like. nothing big yet it's nice. i like it. it feels like it's moving at exactly the pace it wants to and i enjoy it a lot. the sound design is also rlly good. the music is really nice a couple times i got distracted and just listened to it in the bg. the sfx r nice too.

i do not regret my sprite choice i like these designs they're fun, but i do think maria looks a little off for her alleged age of 9, but it's easy to ignore after a min or two.ironically when i was loading the game and saw her on the steam page it def aligned better, but at the cost battler to my eyes is now yassified. he cant be a pretty boy to me he's too lame.

voice acting is great everyones putting fucking everyting into it and i enjoy that. fully commited to the enviroment and its great.

where i left off: everyone just finished having lunch! kumasawa covered for shannon not knowing the red sauce's ingredients. that's all for now! not sure when ill paly more, probably tomorrow, but its been good!! good game so far i like this setg up!! im also eagar to get more into the murder and violence and witch stuff but like, it does a good joib of setting up the characters so i dont feel impatient, and unlike a lot of games w/ murder n mystery that get right into it i kinda find it refreshing how slow this one is to start its like we all know itll get there so the tension of everyone being relatively calm is great.

anyway, umineko day 1: it was good =D

[sketchehm]

Going back to the whole bastion situation since let's just say after the mafia comes back to the bastion, that place does not have a single piglin brute when they're done. When sapnap first sees them he goes right over to where shadoune is and is blubbering and crying that they all left him. While the others are currently on a piglin killing spree, shadoune is calming sapnap down while he's clinging to him like a koala. It's earlier on, so I think this is before he gets a lot closer to the other guys and is very clingy to shadoune. He still thinks farfa is the coolest if a bit scary. He also likes serpias since he's one the nicer ones at the beginning, and with shadoune convinced the other guys to keep him around.

When they're all finished, they go straight up to shadoune and sapnap to make sure he wasn't hurt. Luckily, being fire resistant and having the best toddler armor is pretty good for protection in the nether. I think they'd all in their own way comfort him whether it be serpias giving him a couple of kisses on the top of his head, hand pats, ruffling his hair, or just talking to him from the others. I think it opens their eyes to see sapnap so clearly distressed and overstimmulated. He's had tantrums, but he looks more upset than they've ever seen him. He probably won't leave shadoune's arms until they get back to the overworld.

Then, when shadoune lets him down is when peele comes back, and he goes straight to the toddler and tries to make him laugh and get his mind off of the scary experience. That's when they set the rule of someone having to watch sapnap and making sure there's always eyes on him. They mostly give a lot of shifts to goncho, but they also all take turns when they go on missions or grinding materials.

I'll definitely have to write out different interactions for everyone, but they each have fun with him. They each get even more attached than they expected. (Especially farfa which they tease him about endlessly. See the juan incident lol)

I just want you to know I read this before going to bed last night and I told myself, "this is gonna be mine at least for tonight" LMAO

I did NOT want to share because I love this SO fucking much

I imagine once sapnap is back and is reunited with Peele, he's much calmer and is just exaggerating how amazing he was at the bastion to Peele

Peele knowing better: Oh WOW. You were very braveee!

Sapnap: Si si si si!!!! Muy brave!!

Shadoune with his shoulder covered in snot and tears: yup.....

I assume the rest of Team Mafia will tease baby Sapnap of the incident for a while after that too (I know my dad always kept bringing up the Traumatic Baby moments when I was a baby lmao) though I think they'd learn eventually that while Sapnap will go "nooo >:( I'm not a crybaby!!" he does get a nervousness when the nether is mentioned more often now...so they try to avoid it for awhile

There's this thing my mom and grandma used to do when you get Scared:tm: pretty badly that I'm not sure if other hipsanic cultures do? But its rub an egg all over you, crack it in some water, and it'll soak up the Traumatic energy(there's more to this but I forget oops) and the wisps of the egg whites in the water indicate how badly you were actually scared if the spikes of the wisps are crazy. I was always fascinated by it and I still believe it works to this day haha, my own superstitious belief you can say :>

I imagine a baby Sapnap getting nightmares after this and one them having to rub an egg on his and humming to him so he feels better in the dead of night. Just being soft with him in general. Sapnap waking back up and seeing the egg cup and is like >:0!!!! All the scary is out of me now!!! Look!!! It's all in this egg!! He'd tell Sylvee about the magic egg during their next playdate of course