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Look at that woman (breaking my heart) | part one
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Vettel!Reader
Summary: For one and a half years Lewis and y/n managed to keep their relationship a secret, until it blew up in their faces. Now, they're trying their hardest to pick up the pieces...
Warnings: age gap (reader is 27), heat!!!!, other drivers are mentioned, tiny bit of angst, english isn’t my first language
Prologue
That night…
“As much as I absolutely adore you guys.”, Y/N says as she joins the group, her lips connecting with her champagne glass:” This party is super boring.” The men all look at her, while some eyes make their way up and down her body. One more often than the others.
“Well, I don’t think it’s that-.”, poor Lando gets cut off almost immediately. “I know that this is your first party, considering how they didn’t host them during Covid, however, believe me- back in the good old days these summer parties were the main event of the year for us.”
“Don’t say it like that.”, Lewis scoffs softly, furrowing his eyebrows in distress:” ‘Good old days’, please. Don’t make it sound like we’re in our sixties now.” George giggles.
“Anyway, Lando. When my brother was an active driver, we used to steal a bunch of champagne bottles and hide out in the Ferrari garage.” Her eyes shift back to Lewis, and she stares at him for a moment:” Don’t make that face.”
“What face? I’m not making a face.”, he blinks in confusion. Y/N shakes her headc while holding her index finger up at him: “Don’t act like you weren’t the main burglar back then. Sneaking behind the bar and just handing those bottles over to me like your life depended on it.” At that, all the other drivers in the group laugh out loud. “That was the old, alcoholic me.”, Lewis explains, his eyes scanning her features- almost as if he’s searching for something he can’t quite put the finger on.
“Well, what’s stopping us from doing that again?”
“Wait what?”, Charles asks and exchanges looks with the men around him:” Are you implying we-.” “Bingo.”, she takes another sip of her drink. There’s just something about the way Lewis looks at her side profile that makes her knees weak…he has been staring a lot lately. After a few seconds, Lando is the first one to react, he nods almost violently:” Okay, well- I mean, why not? Could be fun! Lewis and Y/N, you go get the bottles, and the rest of us-? I don’t know. We just distract the others?”
Lewis nods:” Well, yeah. Sure.” He chuckles as he notices the smile emerging on his best friend’s face and the woman quickly sets her glass down on the closest table :” We’ll meet you guys at the exit in five.”
Y/N can sense his presence close behind her. She doesn’t have to turn around to check. His brown eyes are moving down her backless dress and he subconsciously wets his lips at the scenery in front of him. “What’s so funny?“, he asks, as if he knew she was silently giggling to herself.
“Oh, nothing.”, Y/N replies as they reach the bar. The y/h/ced woman quickly leans over and grabs two bottles before shoving them into his hands. Then she takes two more. “You’re still good at this, aren’t you?”, he asks, voice low. “Only when it comes to expensive things. Now, let’s hurry.”
landonorris has made a post
liked by y/nvettel, mclaren, f1 and 378,500 others
landonorris: first f1 summer party- many more to come 🥂🥂
view all comments…
user 1: 😍😍
user 2: hes so fine GOD
y/nvettel: cheers 🙂↕️🥂
user 3: my favorite 🤩
user 4: is it true that y/n and lewis left together
user 5: please you guys are starting to sound ridiculous they’ve been friends since forever
user 6: @/user 5 thank you!!! plus friends don’t date their friends younger siblings
user 7: @/user 6 yeah they do
mercedesamgf1: that garage sign looks familiar 👀
“I think we should head out.”, Lando lets out and yawns, pointing at the clock on the wall. 03:56 am. A soft sigh leaves Y/N's lips while she eyes how the men all get up from their spots on the floor.
“Wait, you’re all leaving?”, she asks, a hint of disappointment in her voice. “I don’t think Lewis is.”, Charles says and cracks his neck. Y/N turns her head to look at her best friend who merely shakes his head.
“Well, okay. Yeah, sleep tight you guys.”
A silence falls on the garage, as the sounds of the voices and footsteps gradually fade away. “I like your outfit, by the way.”, she suddenly declares, cringing as soon as those words leave her lips. She doesn’t understand why she’s becoming so nervous around Lewis- it’s only Lewis, right?
He chuckles:” Thanks. It’s the new collection.” Y/N's gaze falls to the glass in her hands.
“You look stunning.”, he whispers, and when their eyes meet again Y/N suddenly understands why she has been feeling so strange around him recently. “This is going to sound creepy.”, she clears her dry throat:” But I’ve read your latest Vogue interview, where you said-.”
“I like black dresses.”, he cuts her off, eyes once again roaming her body:” You’re trying to impress me?” He knows the answer already. “Well, what kind of impression are you trying to make?”
The younger woman chuckles softly:” A good one.”
“Ans you’re successful. You look unbelievable.”
There’s a line. And they both know it.
Y/N takes another sip of her drink while peeking out of the garage door and into the night sky. She shouldn’t be doing this, she really shouldn’t. Instead, she should be getting up and leaving. Walk away before she does something extremely stupid.
“Can I ask you something?”, Lewis tilts his head. “Of course, yeah. Always.”, Y/N tears her gaze off the stars and looks back at one of her brother’s oldest friends. She should leave.
“What’s your end goal here?”
”I think we both know what my end goal is.”
#lewis hamilton x reader#f1 texts#web weaving#lewis hamilton imagine#lewis hamilton#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1#f1 social media au
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some shit i have to say about this particular thing from the frankly insane ass article sorry:
GH: Why Miami? JC: I love it. Just for me to get away sometimes. That's where I was working out when I came out of college. I don't see myself living there, but it's a nice spot to stay sometimes. GH: You seem to be New Orleans through and though. That's where you would live, I imagine. JC: I don't know. I haven't really decided on what I want to do when it comes to living in places, yet. GH: Do you see yourself being with him the rest of your career or a good part of your career? JC: I see it for a long time right now. We've been together for a long time. We enjoy each other's company. I don't see anybody leaving.
not to be an insane joemarr girlie YET AGAIN but -> ja'marr adores the shit out of nola that much is obvious: choosing to stay in nola for lsu, the way he speaks of it and how he never lets go of his accent even if people struggle to understand him, the shout outs, the fleur-de-lis pads tattoo big ass new chain etc etc so loud in his love AND YET he doesn't say that there's where he would end up in the end. he hauled his ass to cincy, stayed there and made it clear he doesn't plan on leaving (cincy and joe), has a condo in miami with all the beaches and waters he loves but he doesn't see himself living there, etc et-fucking-c AND JUST!!! not to be insane its like he knows that joe is for ohio. joe always comes back to his roots–wanting to go to nebraska like his fam, choosing osu, leaving osu to lsu and choosing to go back to ohio in cincinnati and just not leaving he has shit to prove there he loves it there it's where his family is it's where he grew up it's where he's loyal to and ja'marr just. follows him. 'i don't know' on whether he'd stay in nola where he spent his childhood and college years. 'haven't decided' like there's a place in his mind but he's unsure if he should or if his welcome is for forever or what the boundaries and lines of that forever is and if it's just a wolf-howling-at-moon-never-to-meet shooting-himself-in-the-foot kind of situation. like do you feel me??? i feel crazy like do you get what I'm trying to word out 😭
and like ugh if i can just mention about joe's fondness and love for all the things he's been a part of is so 😔❤️ still wearing all those silicone bracelets to this day the lsu one, covid days bengals one, etc. his ohio state, geuax tigers, athens etc sweatshirts and hoodies that he wears to this day that are in near pristine condition but also looking worn in a way that shows he wears them often and cares for them deeply so they last to this day. showing his love and appreciation in such in your face ways like the burreaux senior day name change, ja’marr’s jersey, etc other examples i can't think of bc my brain is fried :(((((( and so it's like.......maybe that is something that ja'marr notices and wants him to keep you know?? so if he stays in ohio for joe it isn't even remotely a hardship because the city has embraced him so readily and lovingly and he's repeatedly said that he loves the city even if the chili is shit so :(((( just incredibly loyal to a fault these two aaaaa
#its kind of hilarious if you link joe in cincy with#lebron coming to the cavs and winning a chip#lol#but anyway#ja'marr chase#joe burrow#joemarr#joemarr meta#i feel this article will forever be known as The Article for me#also i kind of don't see joe ever leaving cincy tbh. he wants a ring im sure but does it outweigh his love for the city is the question#like is he playing for a ring or is he playing for /cincy/ to get a ring#in osu he /had/ to move to get /somewhere/ in his career yk. but hes here now. and he has the city and the city loves him and well. well.#also they're literally the kind of rich i curl my lip at so they can easily own multiple houses in multiple states and just hop to.#'condo in miami' i will bite you.#also maybe not that readily considering the rookie preseason drops but that just fueled his need to prove himself to the city and joe so
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In a month and a half I have read through the Temeraire series and the entire Laurence/Tharkay tag on AO3 so now I am just sitting here like
#temeraire#it's the one thing getting covid again was good for#like sure i'll probably end up with even more long term health problems but#i have done nothing but lay on my couch for all of november and december#and dream about dragon captains and the spies who love them
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.Magenta.
#in a nut shell...#my whole team betrayed me minus 2#i was told and swore up and down that my absences related to disability were not an issue#come to find out that wasn't the case#there was resentment and everyone did a damn good job putting on an act and masking#i cannot begin to describe the kind of betrayal i am feeling#i believe in being transparent especially if you're part of a team of people who help others with mental health issues#i expressed many times that if my conditon caused inconvenience or problems then approach me and we can navigate around it together#i worked with these people for over 10 months and no one said a damn thing#i had no indication or inkling there was anything amiss even when i inquired before.#even my supervisor who was supportive and freely gave me and approved of time off lied to my face#and as a i handed in my belongings today everyone was ordered not to engage with me because on monday i utilized the chill space#aka the rage room after hours when the kids were gone because after getting interrogated by HR trauma from former work places came up#and with long covid stuff im still figuring out i needed a spot to vent#im not the only employee btw that used that room for personal raging everyone at some point has used it to either be contemplative#scream or toss punch and throw things so long as the kids are not on grounds we can do that#yet when i finally hit that point and want to decompress safely suddenly i am the dangerous monster#these people are supposed to be trauma informed#well trauma informed my ass#on a positive blessing i never have to work with these assholes ever again and i pray we never meet in public#its going to take a long time and a lot of healing before i think i will be able to trust people fully again#savage magenta#magenta is my vent word
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in the Horrors bonanza year that has been 2024 nobody expected the oldest and dearest Horrors of all (covid horrors) to make a third act comeback
#:)#girl who is so clinically vulnerable she's one of the like 10 people the nhs is actually offering the covid vaccine to this winter#anyway for those not in the know my parents are super extreme anti the covid vaccine#and went to great lengths to keep me from getting it in 2021 that were very deranged and tiring to think about#and then went to an antivax rally right at the height of the winter 2021 outbreak and gave me covid from that#and i was so sick i was bedbound until april sleeping 20 hours a day with circulation/bp issues and lost 175 pounds in 12 months#and then entered the 'catching covid very bad every few weeks' carousel that most of you will be familiar with#which probably ultimately ended up being the thing that killed my organs and put me in critical care lmao#anyway!! my health developments did NOT sway my parents' views on anything so the minute they figure out i've been offered this#the good old brainworms will once more take center stage and girls i have too much going on to endure this shit again#genuinely think if things get dumb over this it'll be the final straw that actually pushes me over the edge lmfao
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I need a massive sudden hyperfixation shock to happen again
#that era when i'd just got out of the onceler divorce of summer 2021. and then listened to everywhere at the end of time in october#and it was ruining my life and i couldn't sleep and there was nothing really good happening#like it wasn't Bad bc at least i wasn't depressed anymore like i was in the summer but it was still just dead. and i couldn't get#the last 6 minutes of eateot out of my head#and then. suddenly. got shot with the *blurry screenshot of stan and kyle as adults* beam#south park post covid trailer released. everyone who had ever been in that fandom was awakening from their graves#it was like 'future episode??' 'why have they got noses' 'what the fuckkkk' 'is anything real anymore?' etc#it was such big news that it instantly shocked me out of my existential crisis and reawakened that hyperfixation for the 9347384th time#and i vividly remember going on tumblr the morning after it aired and trying to avoid spoilers bc i hadn't watched it yet#but i accidentally saw a sentence something along the lines of 'kenny's a billionaire philanthropist now' and. ok i had to see a picture?#so i did and he looked like the epitome of a cool uncle#and then i was walking to uni that morning probably looking like i was crying or something bc like. kenny successful future#and the whole thing just brought my general mood up so much?? so by the time it was 2022 i was absolutely fine#and then 2022 was so good. up until like august and september#and things got a bit dangerous again like my mood was alright but the slightest thing could bring it down#and then my best friend/housemate got a girlfriend and it was that whole drama and her existence basically ruined my last year of uni#and since then i've become so bitter and cynical and all victimy and it's so annoying and i don't even realise i'm doing it#so now i only ever notice negative things happening and have done since like the end of 2022#and i just need one of my old hyperfixations to do something insane again. like sp post covid.#i need. idk victor hugo to come back to life and publish notre dame de paris 2. or something#or for pip to come back to south park. that would actually fix me forever tbh#or the golden ratio to announce they're touring the uk for free. okay no ykw that would fix me#orrrrrrrrr idk. secret history made into a film but it's actually good#anyway. the south park kids as adults with noses set off an entire like 8 months of Pure Optimism in 2022 and i need her back more than ever#ramble
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Fanny, my sweet, beautiful girl
17.11.2012 – 14.04.2019
#my art#artists on tumblr#I cannot accept that it has been 5 years already#I know covid messed with everyone’s sense of time but it simultaneously feels so much longer and so much shorter than that#exactly five years ago I was holding onto my mom for dear life and sobbing as we watched lilo and stitch together#not the best movie to watch when you’ve just lost your first ever pet you know#and then I cried myself to sleep at the next morning we never mentioned her again#I know it’s because it was way too painful for everyone involved. but I do wish I was allowed to process that grief properly#instead of bottling it up and pretending everything was okay until I was reminded of her#feeling like my heart was being shattered over and over again every single time#well anyway. enough of that. I’ve allowed myself a nice long cry today and got most of it out of my system#and once I was feeling okay I decided to draw her#and I can count the number of times I’ve drawn animals on one hand so.. I’m not too sure about the result#but it felt like to commemorate her in some way.#so yeah. here she is. my dear girl. the best dog in existence. she was always so affectionate and kind#which I didn’t always appreciate bc of how young I was. when you’re a kid it feels like pets will live forever#never barked. never bit anyone. her only crime was chewing on my mlp and lps toys that I left out on the floor#but I’m grateful she did that. it taught me not to leave my toys lying around and to clean up after myself#she really was taken from me way too soon. ideally she could still be alive right now. but I’ve been down the road of guilt and regret#there was nothing I could do. I was a child. I can only hope that she knew she was loved right until the very end#even if I didn’t know how to show it properly. and great. now I’m tearing up again#I suppose it’s unavoidable. April 12th will always be a melancholy day. and maybe that’s not such a bad thing#it’s good to have a day when I can freely remember her and cry if I need to. it’s healthy. it’s better than crying every day#she never liked it much when I cried. always tried to comfort me. that’s the kind of dog she was. I miss her so much#when I move apartments and get a dog of my own I’m getting a spaniel. just like she was#well. maybe a different colour so I don’t end up sobbing every time I look at it. but spaniels really are the perfect breed#I mean. cavaliers especially were bred for love and warmth. that’s just what I need. it will be nice to have someone waiting for me at home#and while I don’t necessarily believe in the afterlife… I do hope that Fanny’s watching over me#spiritually comforting me when I feel all alone in the world. it’s a nice thought for sure#and hopefully she won’t mind me getting another spaniel too much. it will be done in her honour after all. to make up for my past mistakes
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: :
.....h-h-hemlo.....?
#** t h e c o n n e c t o r [ OOC. ]#|| surprised tumblr still remembers my tags#uhm#hello#i've been once again crazy busy with life#for good reasons this time at least#my routine looks like it's going to be leveling out in the coming weeks#and i want to get back into writing here#especially nams#i miss her so much#and a talk with a coworker today just really reminded me of how much i love one piece#roleplaying was the one thing that got me through covid#and i've made so many friends here#i can't just let that go ||
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I don’t even know what to say about the songs Hozier released today. They’re so PERFECT. I can’t even pick a favorite among them.
#AAAAAAAAAAAA#eat your young#all things end#through me (the flood)#hozier#they’re all so good!!!!#HOW????#also help I wanna go to one of the concerts when he comes to north america but I also don’t want to catch COVID again and die :(#anyway Hozier gets it and I love his music so much
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i gotta say. it is getting so damn hard as a disabled trans+queer jew with a shitty immune system to not feel completely overwhelmed w/ sadness and dread at every moment i'm sure a lot of yall feel the same but like man. idk how any of us are dealing with it at this point
#s.txt#it's just so... it feels like every part of who i am is under attack rn yk? and obv this is not a unique experience by any means#but everywhere i turn there's just such blatent antisemitism and dogwhistles and eugenics wherever i turn and i feel like i'm losing my min#and i'm missing pride again bc i super can't risk covid again and no one fucking gets it besides nat#but like!!! g-d it's so hard!!!#and i've had two different friends reach out to me this week being like i miss you and i'm like!! i miss you too but you don't really mask–#anymore and i don't do unmasked indoor stuff and every outing requires so many checks and balances for me to do and it's just hard#not to mention the guilt i have for like. not being there when things are under attack! it feels like i've abandoned my family#but like. in a lot of ways i've been abandoned first bc things are just not safe for me to participate in yk??#this is the longest rant i'm so sorry g-d#i'm going through it and i just really need something good to happen for me like PLEASE#i'll take a single thing skjdhks#chronic illness stuff
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idea in my head: i would love to animate what the little buddies would do while you get a combo, even if it's just like 5 frame "animation" bc i'm not good at animating
problem: how do i. draw out and animate a combo. like the actual puzzle game part, how would i even start to do that. do i just leave it up to the imagination
#i have a few in mind aaaaaaaaaa i wanna draw the little pig spinning around#i know this makes sense to none of you but i wanna talk about it#I HAVE AN OLD DRAWING OF DEO AS THIANA THAT HAS BEEN LAYING AROUND FOR *YEARS* NOW KJFHDJG#THIS IS AN IDEA I'VE HAD FOR A VERY LONG TIME BC THIS IS MY FAVORITE GAME#a distant dream of mine would be to actually retexture the game and make it playable i would kill to see that happen#but im ***so bad*** at sprite art. i draw in pixel art sometimes but i mean like. 32*16 sprite art HOW DO YOU DRAW THAT SMALL#augh i tried to make one a very long time ago for a long-dead video game au and the creator of the au liked it but. i did not.#maybe if i try again i could do a bit better today#if i retextured even one stage i would actually cry like could you imagine if that worked#i dont even know how to access that info in my roms but clearly someone knows how#bc i have an english version of the japanese game#ALSO COOL THING IF YOU'VE READ THIS FAR I ACTUALLY HAVE THAT ENGLISH/JAPANESE ROM ON A CARTRIDGE :D (it's for the snes)#the cartridge is 3d printed and red it is SOOOOO cool. got it shipped to me for $13 and it is my prized possession that's my babygirl kjfhd#i get to use my super busted up held-together-by-electric-tape controller on it yippee wahoo i like the computer roms but#i like the feedback of the real snes controllers. i have a few usb ones but it's not the same#i thought about replacing the buttons with my (second) real snes controller buttons#but. then i lost my screwdriver set when i moved back home for The Covid Year. so :/#wow that was an essay. i really needed to talk about something that wasnt strictly mcyt fkjdhg i needed a good soul cleanse i think#chat
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bad enough that i am stuck in my life but even worse when i have to work through / around the stuckness in front of people i care about / explain it / be perceived in experiencing it. UGH!!!!!!
#purrs#i live in my childhood home i share a bedroom withy sister it hasn’t been redecorated since before we were born i don’t even have a license#ive never dated or even been liked like that by someone i know except one time ive never done like 75-80% of the things ppl my age do and i#gonna show up empty handed and empty brained to everythi ng and be seen as stupid and uncaring and whatever when really im just tired and m#life is so flat rn and i don’t have the strength to pull it up by myself and give it shape again but i have to. i don’t think i have covid#thank GOD) but i can say even without having ever gotten it and hopefully never getting it that it has ruined my life like genuinely. i mea#good things have come out of it too but i was already socially / emotionally stunted and then being locked down for a year and a half like#literaly not leaving my house for anything but medical stuff until july 2021 was so PRPFOUBDLY damaging. i feel like someone has taken a th#motion blur tool i. photoshop and just drawn like a scribble over me so some parts of me are stretched to where they need to be and other p#parts are stuck at like age idk 16 and i think i need to have most of the parts motion blurred to like… move forward! but i can’t make that#happen and i have to explain it and move around it and it’s so EMBARRASSING omg. girl help i am flowering on the wall i am blooming late i#am hiding in my shell and i want to come out but i also DO NOT so i am cowering in fear forever and never standing up for myself or standin#up at all to be honest!! lol 😸👍#anyways this post is brought to you by how INSANELY much i do not want to reply to a particular email in my inbox or spend my time tonight#[redacted] on express when i am already so exhausted. and if that makes me a bad person then so be it i guess i am one#* i don’t even have a LEARNERS PERMIT let alone a license. lawl <3
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...
#i truely have so much anger built up inside me about my job. ive done a very good job of making it unbearable#and after taking a 10 day vacation. plus 2 days of not working bc im sick. i really dont wanna go back#i was planning to take 3 days to not do fucking anything but my boss just emailed me with some time sensitive#logistical things. so like i guess i gotta fucking do that tomorrow. i started reading the email and it made my head hurt#and she started it off like. hopw ur feeling better and i dont wanna cause stress but...#like bro. listen. if u tell me these things u put them in my head and i csnt stop thinking abt them until theyre done. and its not her#fault bc im the one that put myself in a place where im barely keeping it together. its just frustrating#bc it feels like hope u feel better but also kill urseld 💖 but again thats just how it feels bc im so. idk how to describe it im like in a#state of post burnout. im sitting in the ash. alone in a desolate landscape and its like jesus how tf do i fix this?#and i cant even run out my anger rn bc im sick. and i mean i have the energy to run i dont feel lethargic but like i doubt that would aid#recovery lol. ugh. 2 months. thats all. then i move away. assuming i find a place to live lol. bc i currently haven't yet#but whatever. assuming i get better quickly and dont get worse and dont get covid on top of this cold bc my dad got covid#it will have been a bit of a blessing i came back sick bc i have a clear justification for not working and for telling people to fuck off#when they ask for things from me. like today a lab mate asked if i could sample Monday. which it technically#a holiday but i probably would have said yes if i wasnt sick. and i would have had to teach undergrads some bullshit friday if i wasnt sick#instead i just did nothing all day bc i almost moved bsck my flight and didnt leave home until the weekend anyway#i guess its good i didnt bc then i would have been stuck in ohio bc my dad found out he had covid yesterday#idk its all just frustrating bc im halfway in a transition and im not doing very well but i cant do anything to fix things until i leave#the southwest. like i dont even kno if i have health insurance rn. my benifits change request was processed but like does thst mean it was#approproved? fucking idk. so everytime i do anything i imagine a worstcase scenario where i end up hospitalized and damned to an empty#bank account or eternal medical debt. tho my mum said they passed a law where they arnt allowed to do thst to u anymore 🤷♂️#whatever. im annoyed. i dont wanna work 😫#unrelated
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Magenta...
#I'm in a conundrum#so i have covid again#started showing symptoms last friday and into the weekend it got worse#i have missed a week of work#and i am getting better in some ways but not others#I'm still very much in the thick of it#i already told my boss if I'm still showing symptoms and no signs of getting better I'm going to the docs on Monday#she cool with that and has been very accomodating#but idk wtf im gonna do about bills coming up#and the higher ups at my work place ended covid protections and covid pay ie for the days you'd be out due to covid they'd take care of you#said higher ups also tried to pressure my boss into convincing me to come in on Tuesday at least#i can't in good conscience show up to work even if masked if I'm still having symptoms#I'd feel horrible if i gave it to my colleagues and especially the kids i work with#but also the you're one paycheck away from homelessness thing is digging my head#but i also need to take care of myself#idk man#idk wtf to do i feel trapped and I'm going insane because of it#help? police? murder? advice?
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#some days are so hard like I am very not okay a lot of the time these days but rn I’m actually okayish so I can’t put it into words#but like basically I’ve been have trouble sleeping recently and it’s only gotten worse…to the point where I’ve been waking up every single#night and it’s so hard to get my brain to be sleepy again and go back to sleep#and it’s ruining my life like being exhausted makes life sososo hard I’m miserable and everyone around me is laughing and lighthearted and#I just wallow in my own misery…like when I’m okay I’m okay but when I’m not I question everything#I should really just quit my job and focus on dealing with this chronic insomnia I have now but I’ve been trying different things and#nothing has stuck..part of me probably isn’t trying hard enough but how can I with a full time#job and the need to feed myself and chores and getting my mind of everything and trying to workout more like??#that’s why I need to quit but I am hesistant to move home like I don’t have to but still then I wouldn’t need to pay for rent yknow but I#I also kind of don’t want to move home bc it’s quite nice not to and for covid reasons bc I’m like the only one I know that still cares#about covid lmaooo but like there are definitely pros too like I’m glad I still have the option tbh#but I wish I could just sleep and didn’t have to fight my own brain every single night why can’t I just be normal like I know no one is#normal but also why does everyone else do such a good job hiding it while I just feel like I’m just bringing the mood down by struggling so#much..like also my dept so small rn and I actually do lie my coworkers they really already take a lot of weight comparatively and are#reliable that I feel bad idkkkk why can’t I just sleep like seriously. wtaf is wrong with me#random thoughts don’t mind me#I’m so fucking tired
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Austria coming in with another masterful execution of law!
Now that the covid mask mandate isn't valid anymore we revert back to a law that got approved in 2019 I think... Its a law that prohibits you from masking your face! (literally just made bc of Islamophobia)... So now it's illegal in Austria to wear a mask in public! But also at the same time required to wear a mask if you tested positive! And when your in like a hospital and retirement homes! So now if you wanna wear a mask you need a doctor's note so that you are allowed to in public! :D
#Public includes stuff like trains and busses. University. Most Workplaces.#Not like it's still also a good idea to wear a mask even if you just have a cold or sth so you don't infect ppl etc#It's literally so dumb... Like last year it was still 'its illegal to not wear a mask' now it's illegal to do that?? What???#The law was a dumb law from the start they should have just removed it or at least work on removing it#I really hope the votes next year get our politics more normal again bc it was just absolute chaos the last few years#One dude tried to sell Austria to the Russians or sth like that and then that other dude took over and#Then ppl said that dude is also corrupt so there was an investigation and stuff so someone else took over#And then I think they didn't find something so a few other parties called to get him out of office and then he just quit I think or was#Bullied out and then we had a vote again but the other parties all had shit candidates for chancellor#And I think in the meantime we changed chancellor again as well??? Like I literally have no idea who was chancellor since Kurz (2nd dude)#And then in the middle of covid our health minister also quit I think? 😂😂#Oh and also a satire party (the beer party!) was really popular as well and that dude (Marco pogo) ran for president#Like he didn't get it but still he got like 3rd place with 8% of all votes#It's just all a fkn mess#OH RIGHT and then there was also a thing with an old Nazi song book that was used in the youth group of one party or sth like that#But I honestly can't remember if that was pre or post the Ibiza incident (selling to Russia thing)#Also I haven't fact checked anything in these notes. Be aware that it's 3am and I've been awake for 22 hours at this point.#And that my memory is bad so I might be conflating some stuff or miss remembering
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