#it's really way way way too hard choose all time favorites ahhhh

[nyoomerr]

Very curious about #11, your favorite fics :)

#11: recommend your favorite fic for the fic rec ask game

ahhh honestly it is way too hard to pick out all time favorites, there's just way too much good food in this fandom!! so here's a few qualified favorites, if that makes sense... !!

favorite recently discovered fic "says the shadow" by tciddaemina: when sy transmigrates, it isn't a simple soul possession - sy is an eldritch being that puppets sqq's body while still lingering outside of sqq's body too, invisible to everyone… except for lbh. although lbh starts off terrified of the horrifying spectre that's taken over sqq, over time he begins to love him. after all, lbh can see and hear all the things the spectre does, and since sy doesn't think anyone can see him, he is constantly using his multitude of arms to pet at lbh's head, and muttering to himself about how good lbh is

favorite currently ongoing fic "In the Red" by ibex_ascendant: bingge reverse transmigrates and buys out sy's debts so he can have some control over sy's life, all while hiding his identity as "luo binghe" from sy. i know i just recc'd this fic for another prompt on this ask game, but i really mean it 🙈 the way bingge is written as so awful and yet still so deeply pathetic... hghnhh.

favorite comfort reread fic (oneshot) "Critical point" by mamiser: lbh, raised by huan hua and taught to hate cqm, ends up working with sqq on a mission. this leads to lbh struggling to recognize that he was only taught cruelty and lies by huan hua, including lies about his own self.

favorite comfort reread fic (multichapter) "Tongfang" by The Feels Whale: canon divergence where sy is the well off young master of a household that binghe is sent to work for during some off seasons of cang qiong's training. working as young master shen's personal servant quickly shifts binghe's career goal from "cultivator" to "bride."

[wovenvessel]

Been asking around to see everyone’s fav bmc songs. So: I wanna know what’s your favorite! Full rant and everything!! >:)

oh em gee. AAHHH OKAY >:DD

Okay it's genuinely so hard to pick just one bc I really really like every song from both of the albums but AHHH if I had to choose one I think I'd gotta say...

A guy that I'd kinda be into

FOR LIKE SO MANY REASONS SO GET READY TO HEAR ME RANT.

Okay so this is specific to Broadway but that fact the scene that plays right before that song is the bowling alley performance art scene ;3;

But okay anyways the fact that in both versions Jeremy tells her he can ask him anything (and I KNOW that's the squip feeding him a line) but just the way those words make a doubtful a disheartened Christine feel comfortable enough to launch into song just--AHHHGHSJNSB

okay but anyways the song!! I LOVE THE INSTRUMENTALS SO SO MUCH.  IDK WHAT INSTRUMENTS ARE PLAYING BUT AHGGG in both versions they are just so brain scratching.

THE WAY CHRISTINE SINGS JEREMY'S NAME MAKES ME MELT.

Jeremy's imagination taking over more and more!! Like the pink hearts showing up AHH

Christine's whole mannerisms during this whole song AHHHH.  Jeremy asking the squip if she's talking about him and the squips smugness "of course she is". The swell of the music when that line "i dont always relate to other people my age, except when I'm on the stage. There are so many changes that I'm going through" HDVSUBFJSJS first of all the line is a little to relatable Christine. And then when she says "I guess there's a part of me that wants too!" And THE CHIMES THAT PLAY AFTERWARD!!?! AND THEN JEREMYS IMAGINATION AND FEELINGS REALLY KICKS IN when like the ensemble start vocalizing in a way I swear is supposed to mimic his heart rate and then the harmonizing!!

And then Christine let's herself go on and on with her "i guess a part of me's" and omg whats happening in the scene!!! When she grabs his hand and swings it up and creates like a bridge the hearts cross through!! And then they get pushed together AND THEN THEY LIKE DO THAT AWKWARD SLOW DANCE MOVEMENT as the music continues to swell and the hearts circle around the two AND THEN JEREMY LIFTS HER UP?!!?! AHHHHHH I especially like that in the Broadway version it doesn't stop abruptly so it just flows so nicely.

AND THEN THE ENDING OF THE SONG. I literally think its the best. After ALL OF THAT after convincing the audience/listener that Christine is talking about Jeremy. And the squips stupid smug little face while Christine is admitting who this guy is only for her to say THAT IT'S JAKE. it's so funny and you can pinpoint the exact moment Jeremy's heartbreaks in half >3<. Its so funny watching first time listeners shock when she doesn't say Jeremy's name.

A guy id kinda be into is a song I have loved so consistently and it's just super sweet and makes me wanna dance. Christine's energy is just so infectious and Jeremy pining for her during the whole song AHKHNGNDJ.

Tysm for asking :3c I love the music

[spookyserenades]

THIS IS FOR 1ST YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF TROUVALLE 🎉 🎊 🍾

Readers answer this Prompt- what is your fav moment between y/n and each of the members? (posted by anon).

HERE IS MY RESPONSE!

Jungkook- at first I thought my fav moment would be his 1st scenting scene but after reminiscing on it for awhile I feel like my fav moment with him so far was the bench scene. I don’t know why, but theres something about her reassuring him that she has no favorites that just warms my heart ❤️ also when he thanked her for his b day celebration it was so SWEEET! (Ik thats two moments but i cant choose between then :,(

Taehyung- The moment when tae back hugs y/n at his first art exhibit while they look at the photo he took of her 🥹 that moment is tied with the moment y/n said she trusted him after he told her what happend while he was trying to escape. 

Jimin- Gonna be honest it was hard for me to think of a specific moment between them, I could be wrong but I haven’t seen my mans in a while (besides little tiny moments) 😭. My fav moment has to be when y/n gave surprised him with visa 🥺 she literally shipped a HORSE for him omg 😱 he’s just a manly country man and any time y/n gets the hots for him (like when he was working on the roof of the barn 😉) is always fun lol. Also after his scenting scene (which obvi I love duh) when he talks abt his family and sis 🥺😔

Hobi- The moment when hobi whistles after jin and y/n enter the house after hobi called them when they were sitting in the trunk. He whistles and gets nervous that she gets annoyed by it but she calls it charming and says that its a great way she can find him when hes lost at the grocery store 🥺🥹 sorry i know im rambling but its so cuuute. His scenting scene is also super intense and one i really enjoyed 😉 

Yoongi- The scene during his first basketball game where she ran into his arms!!! He was looking for HER and it is so heart warming to read over and over again. Anytime they tease each other in the kitchen as well!

Joon- Ok, I dont know why but the scene where y/n looses to joon in chess is just so funny to me! And when she throws the chess piece at him and he’s like “you wanna do that again? Hm”. Also when he gave her that opal (i think some stone) after she gave him his b day gifts to show his true appreciation 🥺🥹

Jin- When jin wants to go to the cooking class with HER. 🥹 Also anytime they’ve held each other in their arms while sleeping, like after jin talked about his past with her. This ones short bc honestly they have so many little moments together and so does yoongi and y/n so its hard to pic 🥺 also maybe when she gives him the lord of the rings book, my boy was in his feels 🥺🥹 

TY SO MUCH DANA FOR THIS MASTER PEICE IT IS MY FAV COMFORT FIC PLZ TAKE CARE OF UR SELF AND I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK FOR THIS YEARRRR!!!

HAPPY FIRST YEAR OF TROUVAILLE AHHHH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT BESTIE 😭😭😭😭😭

SQUEALING over all of your choices UGH I'm also a HUGE sucker for that moment with the chess match between Y/N and Joon 🥵 There's so many little moments to choose from, maybe I should pick my faves too? 🤔 AH

I LOVEEEEEEE this prompt so much and I'm so grateful to everyone who's joined me on this story's journey so far😭 Thank you for everything, and thank YOU bestie for reminding me of some of the sweetest moments between the characters so far 💕💕💕💕

[mgjong]

Kotoko - 1, 4, 6, 7, 12, 14, and 23!

Ahhhh Rainbow I hope you are doing well! Thank you so much for the... WOAH 7 QUESTIONS!

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

Gahhh ok so many reasons. Main one, probably her writing. I guess this applies to all the milgram characters too. They are so complex and three dimensional and I love that. I love how each of their actions is carefully thought through. For Kotoko's case I guess it is because she is not only an incredibly well written character but she mixes themes that I am just so interested in. The vigilantism and moral dilemma that comes with taking the life of a criminal "in the name of justice" and the way that mindset is explored. How she is actually a very kind person but her radical ideals drove her into a self destructive cycle where she actively pushes away others and dehumanises herself. The fact she is a walking contradiction, aware of all her wrongs and how she has become a monster just like the ones she hates but unable to stop and put an end to all the pain she is causing. It's so rich, tragic, interesting and just a goldmine to explore. I am never bored when thinking about her. Add that to a great GREAT design and actually funny and clever personality (yes. You heard that. I will defend this.) and boom you have successfully lab crafted one of my biggest blorbos of all time. And. Yeah. I am. Very gay.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

Honestly Kotoko is so interesting by herself that I think I would love to see her in any other media. Hmmm... Maybe... Ah this is hard. I'll find an answer eventually. For now let's just say any form of media which includes supernatural powers. Or probably just a murder mystery novel. She would be so funny in one of those.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

Body type, hair style, clothing choices. I am trying to do a cosplay actually I am sure it will be great haha... Other than that probably eating/sleeping habits and some thoughts on the law system.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

Let's see... I feel like despite not liking her, everyone seems to agree that Kotoko has had a great role in the narrative wether you decide to delve deeper into her character or not. I always love seeing people commenting on how she really carried the second trial.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

So many uhm let's see... I like to think that she fidgets with her rings when she is nervous and usually curls up knees to her chest to try and soothe herself and concentrate. In my mind she must have scars over her body, probably around her arms and maybe on her face but very faint now. Her actual real smile is very tiny and soft.

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

Uhhhh UHHHHHH I know nothing about fashion so I'll just answer with clothing styles. I like seeing her with pastel goth, it's funny to me. Other than that, probably anything tomboyish. Or something more formal, I love suit Kotoko.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

You are making me choose?! I can't do that, I might as well spam you. No minigrams cause that would be unfair.

And many others. I am sorry I just love so many of them. Not to mention the amazing fanarts people make <3

[bisamwilson]

WIP meme: 🗣️ ❌ 💗

thanks for the ask, zainab!!! <3

🗣️: Talk about your favourite WIP

ahhhh this is a hard question because generally my favorite WIP is whichever one i can be assed to work on at any given moment, which is currently none of them rip. but if i had to choose one, it's probably gotta be "buy me some peanuts and cracker jack (i don't care if i never get back)" aka the baseball au!!!

i've got a lot of various things planned for this one, all kind of etched out in a vary long conversation in mysu, but the basic plot is sam and bucky being fwb-that-both-actually-have-feelings-but-they-won't-tell-each-other-that-bc-they-think-the-other-one-just-wants-sex while being first on rival baseball teams and then on the same baseball team! there's going to be more puns than i probably should make about hitting various bases and the fact that bucky's a catcher and sam's a pitcher and a lot of taking care of each other post game/practice turning into intimacy (ice baths, massages, sam is most definitely gonna get a Weird Thing about IcyHot).

also the least sexy thing about baseball is absolutely its players propensity for dip, so in protest, bucky starts chewing various flavors of bubble gum all the time bc he wanted to be able to chew without the chew. sam's got more than a bit of a Thing for it

❌: What WIP do you find the most challenging? Why?

also a bit of a hard one, just because they're all kind of challenging in their own ways. a lot of the aus just have a lot of worldbuilding that kind of has to be figured out before the au really gets written, which is why those get stalled, so those are by definition challenging

but honestly the most challenging is probably the fic where sam's struggling with an eating disorder and bucky's trying to figure out how to help him, just bc it's a little too personal. it's hard to write, because if i'm not in the perfect headspace for it it'll either end up being triggering or just making the already bad food days worse. i really like that fic, but i knew when i started it it'd be a surprise if i ever finished it

also i have no idea how i would end it, because it's a struggle that continues to be ongoing for me (and would probably be the same way with sam)

💗: Is there a scene you can’t wait to write for a WIP?

ooh this is a good question!! i've got a couple bits of the star wars au i'm excited about!!! i think i want to flash back to how sam and bucky first met at some point, which i'm excited to flesh out, and also i'm excited to write their eventual post order 66 reunion (which happens like 10 years in the future and will be probably be fairly angsty bc both of them are in Bad Places right now)

send me an emoji from this wip questions list!

[ovrtimelove]

i actually have a lot of kpop idol ocs with one of my friends, and we make 'fanfic' aus of them heehee. we even have kpop fic author ocs???? lmk if i cooked, u guys (THE LINKS AND USERS ARE FAKE. THEY JUST LEAD TO "https://domain.ext/path/")

anonymous asks : miss nainai!! welcome back to tumblr 🫡 its been a while. have you read any fics you want to suggest 2 us? naizu-visualz : ahhhh thank you so much for the wb o(￣▽￣)ｄ !!!! nainai's class' field trip was very fun, and i read many physical books lol. if im allowed to recommend from the selection there, i enjoyed jack reacher lolol.. it might sound unexpected, because it is mystery and thriller, but i like any genre of book as for fanfic, hmmmmm :3 it's very hard to choose when there are so many good ones... i'll list the ones i remember off the top of my head (≧∇≦)ﾉ !! but i might make a big post? hehe our weathered hearts will remember by @.88czns. myungyun, chaptered, finished. if you enjoy past life trope and want to see reincarnations too, owhwr is a good read for you :D!! it has many emotional moments that can resonate with one's heart. the author has gotten comments and asks that say they've cried to the fic many times.. that means its very good!! i also cried and sent something to her. TT... if you find that you want more after the ending, don't worry!! there is an am:vl spinoff sm!au where they have frequent reappearances, even through the children's banter lol ヾ(≧▽≦*)o blood of the covenant by @.ryungswr. myungyun, chaptered, finished. religious themes, vampire!myungdae, and 1900s vibes, all wrapped into one?? nainai never really thought that it would work with myungyun, but considering bite me era, i dont think i should be surprised.. the way yongsun was handled here made me gasp!! his character was very iconic (as much as i hate to say it LOL) and impacted the story.. poetically written, give it five stars o(￣▽￣)ｄ... if you finish reading it but want more, there's a crack au and a no-schedule 'sequel'! sunflower and angel's trumpet by @.0425zz. lunette, florist!linette x mafia!dailu, chaptered, ongoing. i was a casual dreamie listener, but this made me look into the group even further.. if you like old money aesthetics, double life, and very dynamic character dynamics, please read this story.. the characterization is so fun and refreshing, and there are direct references to sweeties' inside jokes lol. there's even ANGST!! AND I THOUGHT SWEETIES WERE ALLERGIC TO ANGST!!!! /HVYJ....... and it's so well done...... it will make you cry. TT....... chapter 57 'poppy' is nainai's biggest opp. (╯▔皿▔)╯!!! grrrr i will get you, zizi.. bite the bullet by @.88czns and @.mawuwamaz. ot6 rdwy (myeongyoko, magnetz, flowerz) ft. dreamie, mafia au, multi-fic series, ongoing. btb is not one fic, but multiple inside one named bundle! it is basically many stories set in the same universe with the same characters lol. my personal favorite is the flowerz one, because while the dynamic is similar to sunflower and marigold.. there is something more shocking when you get to the middle point hehe. btb has too many good things to talk about, so nainai suggests that you check it out for yourself and leave a reblog!! 🙇‍♂️ we are endless by @.endeulset. post-disbandment, ot7, chaptered, finished. nainai believes that this one is the most emotional, especially for endeuls.. two chapters cover one member (except for seongsu2 who stick together in their chapters) and detail speculations, how they feel about separating from czn and skytali, staying to work there (like sunwoo, jeonghui, and jiyoon), and even having a special chapter inspired by subin's twitter post with the bunnies at the restaurant.. it's very nostalgic and melancholic, your heart feels calm as you read ^^. as an endeul, it made me feel happy for the members, knowing that they've gone on paths that they know they'll be truly happy with.. but they'll still find ways to be together that's all!! maybe nainai will make a bigger post with all her recs, but that's for another day..

i wanted to make nainai's blog real (i even made a sideblog) but with school, ill be too busy to manage it lol.

[enn0s]

Hey theree,

a wild one has appeared again D. 🦝__ 💨

Life slows down for no one sadly but sometimes a busy life is a good distraction. Hopefully it’s not bringing you any unnecessary stress. Ahhhh that’s always nice to hear. I actually was going through your art tag a couple weeks back and realized you were one of my favorite artist when I was using the app more. Glad to still know your phalanges and artistic drive is going strong. I draw but I wouldn’t consider myself an “artist” artist. I’ve been having art block on and off for years, but I will admit I have been picking up the pencil and paper here and there, but I’m not satisfied still with how often I do it.

Do you have any goals when it comes to your creative path? Like maybe one day make it a career or is it just a hobby for right now?

Ooooh~ yes, especially! On the No Mercy EP. I have to say all those songs are favorites. But First sensibility, also got a good amount of favorites 1004 definitely, Check On and Shady lady lady lady~. I looove their rnb vibe too and I don’t like a lot of K-pop music with rnb influence. It’s just the ear feel isn’t always the same lol idk maybe it just me.

Omg…speaking of I officially have a group an actually like to the point I’m watching their videos and actually being invested. I haven’t been like this since B.A.P really honestly haaa. I will say I’m felling cringe about it…but I know I shouldn’t :,^]. But euuuu liking someone to this extent? Brother euuuu. But it is what it is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

They’re called EVNNE and I’m going to see them in August. If you’ve heard of them do you have members you like or songs? I wonder if we’d like the same peeps, if one of them starts with a H…we may scrapp 👊💥

Nahh I’m playinng around lol they deserve all the love and just shows you have good taste to me.

Ahhhh that sounds like fun. I enjoyed the BYG concert, but I feel like the fans weren’t that hype for me but still! Great vibes all the way. Well lol I’m going to another one so thank you for wishing it into existence 🙇‍♀️

And don’t worry about pronouns I’m not a stickler about it but quite nice of you to ask. But to the MBLAQ throwbacks. OH YEEEAH OH YEEEAH OH YEEEAH YEAH YEAH! Vibe and continue getting that dopamine.

Until next time… D. RACC OUT! 🚪🦝 _💨💨

P.S.

I always enjoy these convos as well, especially, it’s kind of not related, when I find people who watch or watched early 2000s - 2010s anime’s. The Nostalgia is always nice. And to share it with someone? Double win.

Reminds me when I wore my Powerline Concert Tee from The Goofy Movie. And the store clerk started singing Eye to Eye. But lol fr this time, I wish you well until the next we speak again.

Oh! And also if you had to choose an animal what would you identify with?

Toodles and 🍜✨~

hello friend i was just thinking about you the other day! hoping you were doing well on your side of the world lol.

thats an incredible compliment for me to hear about my older art, i appreciate you so much 🤧 in my mind, if u try to make art then you're an artist lol im proud of you for picking up the pencil again! its hard to start up again after a long time, your hand doesnt move quite the way it used to and you gotta get used to your speed and your style again like meeting an old friend after a long long time...awkward at first but then you fall right back into it and its different but still good. i definitely had a dip in creative drive for a solid...5 years? idk it comes and goes and i've learned to just let it. no shame in a rest period!

I actually went to school originally to pursue art and design but i discovered very early on that i dont respond well to being told what to create so an art-focused job was just never gonna be something i was going to succeed in without burning out completely.

These days i just have my tiny 10 dollar sketchbook and i've been pulling out the colored pencils and crayons and glue and scrap paper and just. having fun... and it's really kickstarted that urge to create bigger, more polished pieces again. i think my goal is just to keep that love close to me and not lose it again in the hustle and bustle of being alive.

i gave evnne a listen and i like the sound of the ride or die EP! even the b-sides are solid, theyve got great voices, they got a little sauce right out the gate and i see a lot of potential for them! im a long haul kind of person for bands so ill keep checking in on them for sure, they got good things comin for them. They look soooo young to me lmao i just wanna get those kids some sandwiches and a nap 🥲 you can tell theyre working their asses off.

I wonder if you had to make a list, what your top 10 songs (doesnt have to be kpop) would be~ im always looking for new music and i love hearing the songs people love and why they hit the way they do.

Bro powerline tho!!!! what a fucking legend!!! a goofy movie and shrek are unironically masterclasses of cinema to me lol, i had goofy movie on VHS and id play that thing to death, its just so good and eye to eye is a banger. Taste.

Wishing you peaceful nights and delicious foods till the next time we talk friend!

[tsuki-sennin]

Who's ready to cry over a little cactus guy today~? Me~? You~? Us~?

Fun~! More little guys~!

Spoilers, I guess...

-Spanner gave Boruto a bad review so he got attacked by a salty Naruto fan who knew that he was right.

-MechaniChani...

-Crab...

-I wonder who exactly made Isaac.

-Awwwww

-Little guy~!

-You're gonna help us, huh Smaphone?

-Sma!

-Funny enough, Faiz and Kaixa have Ride Chemy Cards just like you in the toyline. You'd fit in great~!

-He caught something~!

-Gotta think the way they think!

-Think fast, chucklenuts!

-Hi, MechaniChani :)

-These're just the most

-Delightful little guys

-Ah, there's our conflict for today.

-No teamwork today, huh?

-Rinne didn't really do anything, but-

-Hello there, kiddo.

-"Can you... please take care of this guy?"

-Filling up a flask, eh? I see this is Labyrinth rules. Where's the Fresh PreCure crew when you need 'em?

-Lachesis again today, eh?

-Okay, have fun, be home before dinner.

-Riku, huh?

-Ahhhh, dads.

-This poor kid...

-Yeah, wiping these innocent people's memories isn't a good thing at all. This is probably the first thing that's gonna go.

-Thinking ahead, are we?

-I concur with Rinne here. I don't think that just because he's a kid means he'll be immune to becoming a Malgam. If Malice in Gotchard works the same way it does in Zero-One, I think just one bad fight with his parents can turn him into a Cacturne. And those bastards are terrifying on Sandstorm teams.

-"Too slow, mine now."

-You get graded based on Chemy catches? Oh, that's concerting.

-C

-Church, I didn't even register that this was a church.

-A bit ironic, considering that alchemy can be traced back through Islamic tradition and Ptolemaic Egypt.

-Easy there buddy, I know you're kneeling before Lachesis in a nun habit, but-

-Oh hey there, Mama. Hotaro ran out and... apparently Sabimaru teleported out, but we can help~!

-"MONEY!"

-"Oh... hey. Get outta here."

-Hotaro does know what people want, at least.

-Ohhhh, steel drums~! Enhance the comedy~!

-Hotaro, if you fail at fifth grade math, I swear.

-Oh

-Cram schoolers, man.

-Poor kid...

-"Round 2! Kick the can! I happen to know a can, I know all their weakpoints!"

-Fight bugs with bugs!

-Ohhhhhhh, seems like Sabimaru's a bit of a stool pigeon.

-Don't lie to me, Kurogane. You've got your own favorite little guys, and they go vroom!

-"This guy seriously sucks. >:("

-"And who am I to tell him he's wrong?"

-It's extremely difficult to win without capturing any pieces... but it's extremely easy to lose without capturing any pieces.

-I see Spanner doesn't trust Minato-sensei either.

-How the fuck can he snipe so hard

-"SPEAK UP MAN, I'M IN A WARZONE!"

-Tea time :)

-Rinne's overwhelmed.

-Oh, hey Atropos, what's up?

-Might wanna choose a less conspicuous outfit

-Tonbo~!

-"Just so you know, this'll be on the quiz later. You might want to take out a notepad or take a picture of the screen with your pet smartphone."

-I live for these costumes

-HE ATE THE NEEDLE

-Shoot him! Shoot him!

-Beefed his jump.

-Hawkstar~!

-Hotaro once again relies upon his understanding of elementary school math.

-NeedleHawk!

-Those shoulders are definitely reused from Bravo.

-SABO!?

-Et tu, cactus friend?

-WHERE

-RINNE???

-ATROPOS???

-Well fuck, man! Guess I gotta watch the next episode now!

[chilumi-shipper]

Ready to Hold On

Xiao x Adeptus!Fem!Reader x Zhongli

Summary: Why not both? Love works in strange ways, and fate has given you a choice. Let it be known that your choice is not to choose, but to love them both. You had a realization when you hear from Xiao that Zhongli apparently had excused himself from your "hangout", you wishes that you could be with both Zhongli and Xiao at that moment.

(Alternative Ending to Ready to Let Go, I suggest you read it first. This version is where you start a polyamory relationship with both of them.)

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"He said he needed to do some extra work because of all the mora he's been spending." Xiao explained as he watch you mold the cookie dough to little spheres before placing them neatly on the tray.

You two were so close to each other, exactly how you wanted it to be. Somehow, you felt as though, you feel something missing. Despite your close proximity with Xiao, him standing right next to you as you create your first every batch of cookies, encouraging you when you say they're probably not gonna be that good, you kind of miss a certain someone who would say very long, unnecessary details about the very origin of cookies, giving you some baking advice so you don't accidentally make a stomach destroyer cookie batch.

Perhaps it was the lingering feeling of golden orbs (aside from Xiao's) that would watch your every move with care, just to make sure nothing is a miss. Maybe it was the feeling of a strong chest behind you or a constant hand of reassurance resting upon your shoulder.

"Y/N..." The soft voice of Xiao calls for you, you looked at him questioningly, stopping what you were doing. "I--" His face seem to turn bashful as he looks down, ears starting to turn pink.

You smiled a bit, feeling giddy as the Yaksha looks for the right words to say. Your eyes gleam as you stare at him expectantly, this was the time you were waiting for!

"You like me?!" In your excitement, you accidentally blurted out your thoughts before he could even finish his sentence.

...

He looked at you, a bit surprised, not expecting that you would blurt something like that out. And yet, you looked equally surprised yourself, covering your mouth with your wrist, since your hands had been handling the cookie dough.

'Ahhhh!!!' You cursed yourself with every bad word you know, screaming internally as you turn your back onto him. 'You're so fricking stupid, Y/N! Why the heck would you say that?! You piece of-'

Even if he did like you back, that's still so awkward!

"I'm sorry..." You whispered, feeling your legs weaken with embarrassment. You heard him sigh from behind you before chuckling.

You felt his hands gently grasping your shoulders, slowly turning you around to face him.

"Was I as obvious as you?" The cat-eyed boy spared a teasing remark, just for you. You can't help but feel shocked, Zhongli said you were obvious too! But Xiao, who doesn't interact with humans to even know how others react when having a crush, is saying that your feelings were pretty obvious? You gotta be real transparent for that one.

You felt your face heat up at what he said, but still, the comment made you laugh. "You're unpredictable, but I like that about you." You finally looked at his golden eyes, and they were filled with happiness, because of you. He is happy because of you.

You scoot yourself closer, now just inches apart from a sweet first kiss. "I like you, Y/N." He finally said it, the words you would imagine him say whenever you're lost in your wondering thoughts, but now, it's actually real. "Is this okay?" You nodded slowly, still starstruck as he gently holds your chin with his gloved fingers.

Xiao tried to initiate slowly, but you smashed your lips against his immediately, stumbling both you back a little, but his other hand slid around your waist, whilst you wrapped your arms around his neck. You felt his smile as you kissed him, which he returned with equal passion.

You slowly pulled way from him, opening your eyes before smiling, "That means, I like you too."

"You're one piece of work." Xiao stated as you retract your arms, ready to go back to baking. "It makes me understand why I'm not the only one who likes you." You freezed at his words, looking back at him like he's grown another head.

"W-what?"

"Morax, he's quite fond of you too, butterfly."

Butterfly, you almost melt at that. Wait, that's not the point, the Zhongli "Morax"? Fond of you too?

Your now lover (hehe, lover) chuckles, although it does not contain any malice or jealousy, unlike how you'd imagine a person to react when they find out another person likes their lover.

"You mean like, friends fondness, right?"

"No." The Yaksha shakes his head.

"How would you know that...?" You quietly asked, still having doubts about what you said. Xiao slides your loose hair behind your ear before cupping your face.

"He acts the same way I do around you." But in your eyes, that still wasn't proof that Zhongli likes likes you. Besides, aren't you only supposed to have one love interest?

"But maybe that's just how he normally is. Why are you so sure?" You questioned him even more.

"Do you feel like you really want him to be here with us right now?" Xiao asked you instead, it's like he was reading your mind or something, you did kind of wish he was here.

You just nodded, not trusting your voice anymore. You looked down to your hands, wiping them clean with a towel.

"You miss him when he's not around, trust him the most, you feel comfortable around him..." You nodded at his words again, not sure where he's getting at. "Then you like him too." You're eyes widen at Xiao's words, your mouth dropping in shock.

"...Xiao, I like you." You explained to him, yet the lingering feeling that maybe he was right started embedding itself within you. He just sighs, before gently holding your hands.

"You can--" He can't help but look down and shake his head. "I can't believe I'm actually the one doing all the talking." You giggled at his little comment, although the feeling of confliction didn't seize.

"Zhongli confessed to me last night, all about how he felt about you. Why he's not actually here today." Xiao finally said, gently caressing your hand with his thumb. "But I forced him to come today." You were a little surprised, Xiao, who would stop at nothing to serve the Geo Archon, actually went against the Archon's wishes. However, you're even more surprised that the mentioned man walked into the Wangshu Inn kitchen, and you already know that he's heard everything.

"Mr. Zhongli!" You try to act normal, but being bombarded with your own conflicting feelings were talking a toll on you. "Uhm..."

Xiao let go of your hands as the older man stood in front of both of you.

"Do you like me, Y/N?" Zhongli asks, despite his sincere smile, you felt the nervousness that courses within him, the same nervousness flowing within you.

You think about this really hard. You've had feelings for Xiao for a very long time, but through all that time, maybe there was another love that sprout without your notice, because you always believed that you could only love one. Both of them have been there your entire immortal life, all of you working side by side to make sure that each of you and Liyue is safe from harm. In all your years of pining, you realized, you crave for both of them when they're not with you, the moment doesn't seem as special without both of them, they're the most important people in your life.

You could never choose one over the other.

Looking up at another pair of golden orbs, you slowly nodded, grabbing one hand of each of your most beloved people in the entire universe.

"I think... I know that I love both of you so much." You smiled as you took both their hands close to your chest.

Zhongli then proceeded to kiss you too, a quick sweet kiss on the lips.

You jumped, "Oh, I forgot about my cookies." Letting go of both their hands, you go back to tending to your treats. "I hope my two favorite people can help taste test after I'm done."

"Of course."

"I'll try it."

You let out a cheerful chuckle, this was probably the most confusing but happiest day of your eternal life.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Requested by: @amethystrain77

[hopefullystillatheatrestudent]

i'm so excited about you taking asks again ahhhh okay so. if you'd absolutely had to choose. what would be your top 5 cockles moments, and why? thank you ily <3

here’s the thing: there are so many routes i could go down with this, because cockles moments come in all shapes and sizes and formats. these include moments from their panels, their bloopers, the footage we get when they don’t even know they’re being recorded, stories being passed down from photo ops & autographs(one of my personal favorite ways to get cockles, tbh, because they’re all insane), and social media(tweets to each other, instagram posts & comments, etc.). 

SO! since many a list like this has already been made, and i want to stand out from the crowd, what i’m gonna do is definitively give the number one spot to each of these five categories.(i might even throw in honourable mentions because they’re so despicably in love that they warrant that. i really put my whole pussy into this, guys, i hope you’re happy.) 

disclaimer: these are my own personal opinions. but that also means i’m right. so. enjoy. 

number one: top cockles panel moment

so we’re starting off with a bang, because how do you even BEGIN to rank what atrocities jensen and misha commit at jibcon. every single one they’ve had is damning in it’s own right, for different reasons.

however, considering just how much unabashed fuckery they’ve given us to sift through, it’s a good thing i do have a personal favorite despite it all. it’s heartwarming, the sweetest thing i’ve ever seen, AND it’s jarringly cinematic - mainly because it has a whole ass arc to it that was years in the making. it might even be surprising to some people, but my favorite cockles panel moment, and what i consider the one that encompasses their entire gut-wrenching journey from 2008-2013 in the most sweepingly romantic gesture possible, is this one.

i want this burned into my retinas. i am not even joking. when i'm through with my explanation, let me convince you why this is thee most romantic cockles moment of all time.

first, some history: people call this the resume off, but many seem to forget the botched attempt at a resume off a year prior. and yes, you guessed it: it's during their break up. it's a juicy time period for a reason, guys. it came across as exceedingly one-sided and VERY awkward. let me refresh your memory as to just how bad it was, and just how hard jensen was trying and ultimately failing at winning misha over: the funniest part of the whole resume off in 2013??? every joke/bit had literally already been made/done. they were just going through the motions again, but the difference THIS time...is that misha reciprocated jensen's energy. it. is. fascinating. i want to get into it more detail in another post, and i'll link it here when i'm done, but the main takeaway, i think, and the main difference that showcases how much they've grown in a year, is that in jib 3, misha flat out refused to do an accent, and this time around, he indulges jensen for literal minutes. when i tell you they're crazy, they're crazy. i can't wait to actually dive into it later.

ANYWAY, the resume off culminates in this moment here. and, like, a million things happen in this gifset. actually, more like a million and one. the music starts playingneediremindyouthatthesongissingingintherain(h e l p), misha starts dancing, jensen 'perpetually fake grumpy' ackles lets misha think he's not going to join, misha sits down defeated, but no!!! that was jensen's plan all along(look at his stupid fucking smirk) and he offers his arm to his dance partner who immediately grins like a fool, jensen then leads misha into their kick step, they perfectly synchronise and let loose, and are then very clearly having the time of their lives, hanging off of each other with joy and ease. from their expressions alone i can tell that this moment is so. so. so. so! much more than what initially meets the eye. i mean-misha is fighting back the biggest smile i've ever seen. to me, it reads like jensen is offering something to misha, something that misha kind of gave up on expecting, and him offering his arm like that is like, a surprise to him in the best possible way(and it's so not platonic, let me just say that.) as soon as jensen did that, it ushered in a new era of cockles. this panel is jensen and misha's favourite for a reason, and i think this moment is the biggest clue as to why.

whew!!! ok. that took a lot out of me and that was only point one. moving on,

number two: top cockles blooper moment

cockles bloopers hold an extremely special place in my heart, because it shows just how fucking disastrous jensen and misha are. they are so goddamn infatuated with each other that they HOLD UP PRODUCTION ALL THE TIME TO FLIRT WITH EACH OTHER(???). let me repeat. let it sink in. jensen ackles; arguably one of the most professional actors on that show who puts everything he has into each scene, with mountains and mountains of notes to prove it: would rather hold up production to flirt with misha collins. this sounds fake. it's not. he does it. all. the. time. and here's the thing guys!!! i'm gonna let you in on a secret!!! misha loves it. he loveesssss it. on top of that-misha collins: overlooked because he's pranked and people assume he's unprofessional as well, but his only pranks are in retaliation/off-set, and he rarely if EVER causes problems if he can help it....lets himself get carried away when it comes to jensen making kissy faces at him!!! are you actually kidding me!!! i mean. misha. it's just a face. you've seen it a million times. i don't buy that it triggers something in you that strongly....you like it, and you like jensen's reaction. you can't fool me!!! lisa berry's face in that one gifset shows just how fed up the crew is with their gross, coupley boyfriend antics.

i could pull up so many examples. sooooooo many. but my favourite was sealed since the moment i saw it.

i actually already wrote an analysis on it but i can't find it :(((( which SUCKS because i really unpacked the whole thing. i'll try to summarise.

basically, a backstory is part of this too!!! jensen and misha both had a really really hard time with this scene(because it's explicitly romantic there i said it), they sat down for hours and poured over their scripts together, they were super super nervous going into filming, both of them, jensen especially, were super hard on themselves for their performances not being true to their characters but they both complimented the other's work(boyfriend moments fr). so, yeah. they weren't confident going into shooting. and how do they get themselves to feel better???? by cuddling each other, apparently.

a lot. a LOT. happens in this specific blooper. to the point that i saw it years before i knew about cockles and it raised all sorts of flags for me.

1) stop pulling my face towards your crotch(as a thinly veiled request that misha would, in fact, move jensen's face towards his crotch, considering it was jensen moving himself there in the first place. also, why so comfy down there guys???) 2) you're my baby daddy i know(in the most intimate voice i've ever heard please) 3) i know, i know, i love you too i didn't say i love you i know but you wanted to say it etc. misha's right, of course. that's what jensen meant.

it just reeks of comfort, familiarity and intimacy between the two, and it's a moment that is extremely sweet and silly at the same time. they're so <3

number three: top cockles found footage moment

WONDERFUL category. truly the culmination of the cockles experience. many people have said that shipping cockles doesn't work because 'they're just onstage you dummies!! they're playing it up for the audience!!!' here's the thing, love. i could not disagree with you more. once you climb your way up the cockles ladder, you soon learn that they are, in fact, playing their dynamic DOWN, not up. they really are just Like That™, and they could not care less about the paying audience, if we're being honest, considering how much time they take to giggle with each other and refuse to let the audience in on the joke. and i love them for it <3

anyway, my point is that this category is for all you naysayers out there, all you 'jensen and misha's relationship is just for show and is real life queerbaiting'(?????lordhelp???) oh yeah? ok, explain this.

he. he. he calls jensen sweetheart. literally enough said. there's nothing to really add here, except, misha and jared then immediately engage in damage control. jared's method is distraction and misha's is retconning('get out of the car, dude') this was what got me to buy into the cockles dumpster for GOOD good. you don't call your buddy sweetheart accidentally and sound so completely earnest while doing it! especially not when that buddy is jensen ackles!!! you think he would let any of his friends call him that? do you?

one more thing; if it was a slip of the tongue, little mouth thing or whatever, you think jared wouldn't have jumped on it immediately??? i can hear it now. 'did you just call him SWEETHEART???' yeah. that's what i thought. you know why he didn't? because it was too revealing.

number four: top cockles autograph moment

i mean, i think we all know what it's gonna be, and if you don't, well, do i have the piece de cockles resistance that is gonna send you over the edge.

if you haven't heard of this story by now, as a cockles, truther, i'm gonna go ahead and get you to read it, because there is no possible heterosexual explanation for any of it, and you're fooling yourself if you think otherwise.

spoiler alert: it's the story where phones weren't allowed in an auto session, jensen nuzzles himself in misha's hair, leans his full body weight onto him, holds his hand, etc. etc. i'm imploding just repeating this back, actually. also, just, the sheer amount of stories from photo ops where they tackle hug each other or slap each other's asses or sing romantic songs to each other or almost kiss is, frankly, a lot. if i could wish for anything, it would be to witness them in person.

and finally,

number five: top cockles social media moment

this one is super difficult, because there's obviously a lot to choose from. but you know what? full send, i'm going with this one:

i just. what to say about this. how often do misha and jensen watch sunsets together for it to qualify as ‘always’ ??? why are sunsets synonymous with their relationship??? that’s like??? a very romantic thing????? ‘this guy’??? the fact that it’s a CANDID??? i don’t know guys.

that could have been better but i am TIRED so. there you go rose ily

[sweetestlamb]

Try A Little Tenderness

Summary: Han Seo gets treated with kindness and affection and he doesn’t know how to process these foreign feelings. Also he gets a first eye contact of the mafia couple. 

Author's note: A few of you said you would like to read this so I popped it out real quick in between real life and all that mess, I did something like this for IOTNBO and really enjoyed that sometimes it’s fun to see a relationship from an outsider’s pov. I also saw a few people say that they ship our puppy with a certain someone so I threw in some crumbs because the visuals would be very pretty and good for my health. It has talks of past abuse (see psychopath brother) but I don’t think it’s any darker than the regular show. Happy reading! 

He keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop, for them to realize that he's nowhere near good or smart enough to keep alive such less work so closely to them and listen to their plans. They trust him, he can tell by the way that conversations don't taper off if he comes into the room with another question about how to use the copy machine- there are so many buttons and it's confusing figuring it out by myself.

This first time he sheepishly asks for help after reading articles online and coming no closer to understanding the massive machine, he expects more fanfare; a slap on the cheek, a rap on the forehead or just a simple sigh and "idiot" that he would smile in the face of but the word would stick to his heart for days on end. His eyes were glued to the ground after his inquiry so he missed whatever look they originally gave him but surprisingly enough Ms. Hong stepped forward, he almost flinched as the hand approached his view but instead of pain he just felt warmth on his shoulder.

Guiding him with the hand on his shoulder, she led him back over to the machine and patiently explained all the buttons to him, even smiling gently when he pulled out a little notepad to write down the many directions.

"You really only need these three buttons this is the power button, but this thing is ancient so sometimes it may need a good kick." He jumped marginally at the loud bang of her foot against the side, quickly writing that down as well.

Really old. Needs kick.

"Then you press this button to choose the amount of copies, choose double or single sided and choose with staple and that's it." His eyes darted rapidly trying to keep up with her directions while taking his notes. It sounded simple enough but his brother had taught him that if there was a way to fuck something up, he would find it, naturally. So his nerves skyrocketed when she turned to him with a grin and said, "Are you ready for another test? Make 20 copies of these." She handed him a small stack of papers. 

His heart jerked in his chest and suddenly he was fifteen years old again staring at a test sheet and knowing none of the answers. It was hard to study with the fear of Han Seok barging into his room at any moment to do another sick experiment on him, once he had sliced his finger just to watch it bleed. He'd told his father that he accidentally cut himself while cooking and let the shame wash over him as he got a look that screamed that he was incompetent and pathetic.

"Han Seo? Are you okay? You seem like you're a million miles away." The pretty lawyer's concerned voice brought him back to reality and he could feel the stares of the other men in the room on his skin, Vincenzo being the heaviest. He really didn't want to look stupid on front of the man for some unexplored reason. He swallowed hard before facing the machine, feeling like he was going off to war.

He pressed the big power button, shaken when nothing happened but suddenly remembered his notes and with an almost unnoticeable glance he found his answer, swiftly kicking the beast of a copier he watched it roar to life and almost on autopilot he mimicked the motions that Ms. Hong had just demonstrated and watched in terror as the paper was swallowed and the copies were spit out from the compartment in the bottom.

I did it.

Everything seemed to be in order and the machine hadn't exploded. Yet. 

"Oh."

The triumphant smile that had graced his face slide off like rain on a windowpane.

"I messed up. I'm sorry. Please let me try-"

He was bowing before he could stop himself, shame a familiar friend at this point in his life. There were very little moments that he didn't feel a tsunami of shame crashing over him in a thick heavy sheet.

"You just forget to select stapled. But that's minor, we can just staple them by hand." She responded nonchalantly picking up the copies and bringing them over to the table, "Good job though. Next time you'll probably get it perfect right?"

It was pathetic. He was pathetic. There was no reason for pride to grow in his chest like a mustard seed, he had only completed a basic task. Something that even a monkey could, actually monkeys could do even more complicated tasks.  It was nothing to be proud of. He shouldn't have been smiling as largely as he was, they would think he was insane and kick him out.

But.

She'd said he did a good job. That wasn't a phrase he was used to hearing, he wasn't someone who did anything worth praising. He shuffled away back to the shelves that needed to be organized in alphabetical order, moving a large file to the front of the row unaware that there was an equally huge smile on his face. It stayed there for the rest of the day.

Working there was different from working with his brother. Astronomically. Nobody hit him there, even when he made mistakes. Instead he just got three heads over his shoulder helping him fix said mistake or Mr. Nam pushing his chair out of the way and taking over with only a gentle chide of, "Be careful next time." And it's clear that they all care for and respect each other. It's evident in the way that there's no clear hierarchy at the law firm, when they have meetings they alternate on who makes the coffee for the team, take turns buying meals and they are all allowed to speak and share their ideas without waiting for approval. It's nothing like he's used to and it makes him wonder if this is normal and what he's used to is...not.

It's enough to overwhelm him.

Then something catches his attention in the peripheral of his eye, Ms. Hong impatiently goes to take a sip of her coffee ignoring Vincenzo's firm warning against doing so and she flinches at the heat of the beverage, sticking out her tongue instantly after the first sip, blowing and huffing theatrically- something he's grown used to seeing from her. This isn't what shocks him though, it's Vincenzo's reaction. Immediately he walks over to the water cooler, filling a little paper cup before bringing it back over to her and thrusting the cool liquid into her outstretched hands.

"I told you to be careful." He says voices filled with exasperation as she gulps down the water, shooting him puppy dog eyes.

"I thouf it mould be cool enouf." She replies around her extended tongue and he watches the interaction with wide eyes, that only grow larger when the murderous Mafia member picks up the lawyers mug of steaming liquid and starts to blow on her coffee, his lips puckered into a perfect o. Ms. Hong watches absently as if this is expected behavior and after a few minutes, Vincenzo takes a sip of her coffee deeming it cool enough before handing it back to her. She takes a sip dangerously close to the spot his mouth had just occupied and hums at the temperature, shooting him a brilliant smile. To his utter surprise the usually stoic Mafia member smiles back fondly, before walking off to make a call. Ms. Hong watches him walk away before realizing that he's watching their interaction and a delicate blush blossoms in her cheeks before she stutters walking off to her table.

He glances between the two with his head tilted. Feeling curious.

Once he starts looking it's almost indecent how often the two touch each other, Vincenzo's hand never too far from Ms. Hong's back or arm and she never reacts to the sudden touches, no flinching or tensing up when a foreign hand is suddenly on her person. That's a new concept for him, he doesn't like surprise touches.

Then there's the fact that Mr. Cassano never allows Ms. Hong to hold anything, when she comes bustling through the doors with bags in her hand the smell of pasta permeating the room the older man is already making his way across the room tugging the bags from her hands wordlessly. He places them carefully on the table before smoothly dragging out her chair and guiding her into it with a hand on her waist.

"I brought your favorite. Authentic Italian food." She smirks up at him, opening the containers and he feels his mouth water at the tantalizing aroma that fills the room even more than before.

"It smells amazing! Where did you find authentic Italian food?" He asks inserting himself into their conversation and for a minute, he second guesses himself gearing up for a blow. But it never comes and Ms. Hong waves him closer, pushing a container of thick noodles in his direction.

"Are you hungry? Here have some!" She shoves chopsticks into his hand and watches him eagerly and he can do nothing but follow her orders, stuffing the tomato sauce drenched noodles into his mouth. When he looks up he sees that they are both watched him avidly, awaiting his review and he smiles around his bulging cheeks putting up two thumbs.

"It's delicious! Best Italian food I've ever had!" He stares excitedly and he's unprepared for Vincenzo's sudden glare, it's the first time the man has thrown such a look his way he gulps nervously at the unnerving sight.

"What- did I say something wrong?" He warily asks watching the Italian man angrily stomp off whilst muttering something indecipherable to him but that makes Ms. Hong smile mischievously, grabbing the container and chasing after the fleeing man.

"Stop being a snob! Have some, say ahhhh!" He can't comprehend the sight that he's watching, dumbfounded as the petite lawyer hangs on Mr. Cassano's arm and tries to feed him the Italian food.

"No! I don't want it, stop! Why do you keep bringing that here?" The Italian Mafia boss whines pushing her away but he notes that he never pushes her too hard, his shoves are very soft barely rocking her slight body. When she starts to chase him around the room, Han Seo can only watch in shock the behavior too childish for him to reconcile that these are the same people who have been thwarting all his brother's plans. Not even Mr. Nam entering the office is enough to stop their shenanigans and in the end it's Vincenzo who admits defeat, backed into a wall. Han Seo waits for her to give him the food and for this moment to come to an end. But neither one of them make a move, frozen against the wall staring at each other looking a million miles away.

It's then that it clicks for him.

They are more than just partners. 

When one of the various plaza tenants burst through the doors only then is the tense moment severed, Ms. Hong jumps back flustered thrusting her hand at his face and Mr. Cassano has to open his mouth lest he get smashed in the jaw. He watches amused as a grimace crosses the older man's face as he swallows the food as if it's poison.

Ms. Hong flies across to help the cute pianist that he's seen around a plaza a few times. He stares at her from under his bangs, looking away when she catches his eyes. Coughing loudly he walks away to do something important that doesn't involve losing his wits because of a pretty girl. Maybe he can talk to Mr. Cassano later just to ask about her, there's nothing wrong with being curious about your neighbors after all.

He doesn't know where else to go so he comes to Jipuragi, letting out a sigh of relief when he sees all the lights off. He pulls the key that Mr. Nam gave him from his pocket, still in disbelief that they trusted him enough to give him a key to the establishment. He had blinked away tears when the older man pushed the small metal object into his hands, it felt like a huge responsibility. Almost like he was being accepted into their makeshift family. It was far more than he deserved. 

Sitting down on his chair, he lets the agony wash over him. His cheek is throbbing, sore and swollen from the open handed slaps against the skin. Their stocks had dropped again from all the accusations and bad publicity, and his brother had once again taken it out on him berating him like a dog before kicking me out. It's nothing new, nothing he's never experienced before but it feels worst. Now that he's been around people who don't treat him like he's dirt, it hurts even more to go back to the old ways. He's so lost in thought he doesn't notice the door opening or the person creeping inside.

"What are you doing here?"

He jumps at the unexpected voice, twisting in his seat panicked. His heart rate settles once he sees the cool eyes of the man he's grown to respect. Vincenzo Cassano. He slumps in his seat, no excuses coming to mind and then it's too late and the other man is crossing the room and taking a seat across from him.

Those cold eyes narrow as they search his face, "What happened to your face?"

Images of his brother looming over him and slapping him on the ground flood his mind, along with his screams of pain as he pleads for him to stop. Then visions of a much smaller version of himself pleading similarly as his brother pulled his hair and laughed at his cries. He's crying before he ever realizes that the tear has condensed. 

Vincenzo tenses across the table, looking lost and uncomfortable.

It only makes him cry harder. It's so much better than getting hit.

Without a word the Mafia boss stands up pushing his chair away, stomping powerfully to the door. He watches alarmed before finding his voice and calling out, "Where are you going?"

The man looks at him darkly answering, "To kill your brother."

He gapes at the statement said so matter of fact and a bubble of laughter rises to the surface, making him chuckle through his tears. He rears back further at the other man's blatant confusion following his outburst, feeling freer than he's ever felt because this is the first time someone has tried to defend him.

It feels nice. Better than nice, unbelievable.

His heart thumps as he looks at the other man that he has every reason to be scared of but instead he feels safer than ever in his presence, it almost feels like what a brother should. A real brother not the one that he has who would kill him tomorrow without batting an eyelash.

"He's not done suffering yet. But thank you." Vincenzo shifts awkwardly at his show of gratitude never accepting of thanks something he has noticed while observing the enigmatic man, he vaguely wonders what this man has been through to make the complicated person he sees in front of him. Maybe one day he'll ask.

"Well if you're going to stay here, there's a bed up there."

Impulsively he replies, "Have you ever used it before? Is it really okay for me to use?"

He's met with a puzzled look, which he returns with a calculating one and then he spares a quick glance over to Ms. Hong's table and the gears click and Vincenzo is tomato faced and yelling, "Watch your mouth you brat! Do you want a beating?"

It shouldn't be funny with his face still throbbing from a beating just hours earlier, but he laughs so much his stomach hurts and that pain dulls the ache in his face.

"Oh my goodness what happened to your face?" He's barely able to get out an answer before Ms. Hong is jogging across the room, ever so gently catching his face in her small warm hands. Immediately he's reminded of his mother and he has to look away before he embarrasses himself.

He mumbles a lie about tripping but she's already sending a ferocious knowing look over to her partner and he watches their silent conversation with large eyes, until her voice breaks the pregnant pause.

"I can't wait until we kill that punk. How dare he put a hand on you? I'll go get some medicine, you-" she points to Vincenzo, "get him some ice before it starts to swell." The man automatically follows her instructions, looking like a dutiful husband.

And that's how Mr. Nam finds them, Vincenzo pressing ice wrapped in towels against his cheek as Ms. Hong squeezes creamy ointment onto her finger and smears it across his cheek. He blames his glossy eyes on the pain in his cheek and not the one in his chest.

It's his first time walking around the plaza and he tries to ignore the suspicious eyes that trail him, he knows that they know him as their enemy's brother and underling so he doesn't blame them for not trusting him, he would do the same. The clang of piano keys catches his attention and leads him to the source of the noise like a siren luring lost men, he watches transfixed through the glass as delicate fingers fly across the keys in a frenzy. It’s mesmerizing. 

He was forced to get piano lessons when he was younger, he was surprisingly good at it even better than Han Seok thus his brother became enraged and smashed his fingers putting a permanent end to his lessons.

The music lulls him into a sense of comfort so much so he doesn't realize when it ends and the small pianist notices that she has an audience.

When he finally looks up and catches her eye, he freaks out expecting her to look at him like all the others have today so he's unprepared for the door to slide open and for her to beckon him in with a crooked finger. He walks in almost as if in a trance, she's so pretty it's almost unnatural a supernatural glow surrounding her in her white flowing dress.

"How does it feel working at Jipuragi?" She asks suddenly catching him off guard, he sputters before taking a deep breath and looking away before replying, "I feel useful. It's....new."

That's all he can disclose and honestly it's more than he intended on saying but a knowing smile stretches across her pale face.

"Vincenzo, he's someone special who can make others feel special too." He smarts at the clear adoration in her voice, of course. She liked Vincenzo too. Every woman at this plaza probably did, the Italian was much more appealing than he would ever be- naturally charismatic and handsome, every woman's dream.

He smiles defeated stepping further into the space, running his fingers longingly across the piano keys. Something else that just wasn't meant for him.

"You like him too. It makes sense, he's really cool." He whispers, self deprecation swaddling him like a blanket. 

It's obvious who else he's referring to only Vincenzo and Ms. Hong seem to be in denial at this point everyone else assuming that they're already dating.

She doesn't deny his accusation. It's his own fault for having hope but that knowledge does nothing to tamper the hurt that rumbles in his chest. 

She hums before walking closer to him, fingers trailing across the black and white keys.

"I did. But they're good together."

He stills in shock, lightly pressing down on the key beneath his finger the sound vibrating through his skin. Then she presses another key that rings harmoniously with his and he can't not look over at her and he jolts breath stuck in his throat when he finds her already staring at him with a serene smile, "There are a lot of interesting people here though, someone else has caught my eye."

He plays the final note to fulfil the chord they started and their eyes never leave the other, music floating on the air between them.

Full. He’s never known what that felt like before but now he feels full of everything and he can't go back, can't ever go back to the way things once were.

There’s no looking back, only forward. 

[calltomuster]

Star Wars Fic Recs Part the Fourth

[first fic rec list] [second fic rec list] [third fic rec list]

Been a few weeks since I've done one of these and I've read/reread some great fics recently so let me share them with you now!

And I Fear Nothing by @maiseey (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 11/? chapters, 43.4k words) Picture this: I am sitting in the parking lot of my local grocery store, having just bought a load of perishables. I get the email that And I Fear Nothing has just been updated. What do I do: run home to preserve the food I just paid for, or sit in my car and read the new chapter right away? The answer is obvious, of course! That is exactly the situation I found myself in last week when chapter 11 dropped and I did in fact choose to read it in spite of my groceries, that's how much I love this fic. In this fic, Obi-Wan and Cody are raising Luke and Leia together on Tatooine, and they've got so much trauma, and new + old wounds, and love for each other and the children they're raising that it both warms your heart and tears it apart. But that's not all, this fic expands beyond just the small home in the middle of the Jundland Wastes and explores Ahsoka and Rex and their journey to de-chip as many clones as possible. I love this fic because it doesn't shy away from hard conversations, but it does it in a way that makes you want to cry and give everyone involved a hug. Plus, there are some fantastic minor clone characters that you will 100% want to die for by the time you finish reading. Cannot recommend this fic enough.

Obligate by @communistkenobi (gen, one-shot, 23.9k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) Just when you thought the Deception arc didn't have enough pain, this AU sees Anakin fake his death instead of Obi-Wan! My heart is physically ripped out of my chest just thinking about this fic, so imagine what it'd do to you actually reading it. Anything @communistkenobi writes is so well-done and I've gone through his works list on AO3 multiple times, but somehow I missed this when it was first posted and it was like a wonderfully delightful surprise when I ran into it the other day. So, so good. Highly recommend!

Moirai by damonkey (gen, WIP, 4/? chapters, 9.2k words, Obi-Wan & Qui-Gon) All I can really say about this fic without giving anything away is that it's a Phantom Menace AU and it's so intriguing. The author is very deliberate in having a vague summary and only tagging as the story progresses, so I truly have no idea what's ahead of me but it's so -- as I said -- intriguing that I'm happy to strap into the ride. Ahhhh I'm skimming through the fic and there are so many things I want to mention but I don't want to give anything away!

Almost Home by @frunbuns (gen, one-shot, 5.2k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) You know, every time I recc a Modern AU I'm like "I don't usually like Modern AUs but..." and then proceed to gush over the fic. I went and checked and I've recced a Modern AU on almost every fic rec list I've made! Maybe I do like Modern AUs?? Or maybe the fics are just that good -- and this fic is definitely that good. In this fic, the first of a planned series of fics set in a modern Star Wars universe, Obi-Wan is reeling from the loss of his adoptive father Qui-Gon and has to care for a young Anakin. Ooooooof. Definitely hits you right in the feels, this one. Love the non-chronological storytelling too!

Naked and Not Paid by biscuitlevitation (Obi-Wan/212th Attack Battalion, WIP, 6/? chapters, 14.9k words) This fic is essentially ~15k words of the clones thirsting over Obi-Wan and it is the funniest thing I have read all year. I'm not kidding, I just read the last chapter which features space-church-lady!Anakin and I laughed so hard I cried. I'm cracking up just thinking about it. I promise you will have a good time reading this fic. And if the tag "Obi-Wan Kenobi/212th Attack Battalion" puts you off, let me just say there's no sex in this at all, it's just thirst. And it's hilarious.

Full Disclosure by @trixree (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 2/3 chapters, 7.4k words) ROTS AU in which the Force bonds Obi-Wan has formed with a few members of the 212th save them from the chip and Order 66, but it doesn't stop the devastation from happening on a mass scale and they all have to try and deal with Mustafar and Luke and Leia. This fic manages to be both extremely soft and extremely gut-wrenching at the same time, and I wish I could leave more kudos. Full disclosure (get it, little pun there for ya), I will be dying until the final chapter comes out. Time to go listen to Olivia Rodrigo and reread this fic and just live in my feels.

Thirteen Days by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 (gen, one-shot, 4.1k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) Post-Zygerria arc, Anakin dresses an unconscious Obi-Wan's injuries and struggles. Ahhhh this fic is one of my favorite Zygerria arc fics, and given that that's my favorite arc, that's saying a lot! Obi-Wan doesn't say a word in this fic, but his presence is very much there, if you know what I mean. And the descriptions of injuries here are pretty graphic at times, but it's so good that you'll want to keep reading even if you have to do it through the fingers covering your eyes.

brother, let me be your shelter by @kenobilovebot (gen, one-shot, 1.6k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) This fic packs so much tenderness in a short amount of words. It covers an AU in which Obi-Wan's issues from Zigoola never really resolve, and Anakin finds out when -- well, you'll just have to read for yourself. I love Zigoola because it is such an excellent whumpfest for poor Obi-Wan and this fic is great for that, but also highlights Anakin and Obi-Wan's relationship.

A Padawan At War (Again) series by @itstimeforstarwars (gen, 3 parts, 100k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) In this series, Obi-Wan and Anakin are transported from The Phantom Menace into the Clone Wars and have to deal with all that comes with it: fighting wars, discovering a Padawan you never knew you had, dueling your grandmaster who apparently is a Sith Lord now(?!) and all the rest. This series is a great ride, and I look forward to every update. Note: the first fic in this series is a one-shot that was expanded upon, and it drops you in media res. The second fic is a prequel that shows how they got to that point, and the third fic is the sequel that shows what comes after.

The Desert Storm series by @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning (complete, 24 parts, 1.144 million words) There has never been a better time to start reading this series. If you read Star Wars fics on AO3, then you've definitely seen the Desert Storm series before, but maybe you were daunted by the high word count, or felt like it would be too much effort to go all the way to the beginning of a series but couldn't just jump in halfway. Let me tell you, it's 100% worth it, and now is the perfect time to read this series if you haven't already. This series is complete, but it turns out it's all just Act 1 of the larger story, which will continue in the Rise and Fall series. @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning is taking a break right now before starting the next series, so you have ample time to get caught up, and YOU REALLY SHOULD. Let me tell you, this series had me on the edge of my seat more than any other piece of media I can remember. With the most recent chapters, where everything that has been building for a million words came to a head, I would get so worked up after each chapter that beforehand I would have to queue up calming things to watch afterwards, and it still wouldn't be enough and I'd be too full of feelings to get anything done the rest of the day. Seriously, this series is amazing. And if you HAVE read it before but haven't reread, now is the perfect time for that as well. I've reread this series multiple times and it's so rewarding because the author sprinkled in so many hints as to what will come that you only understand the second (or third) time around. I know I've written a lot for this rec but this is a long series and it deserves it. Go read! Now!

If you like any of these fics, please consider reblogging so they can get more exposure! And if you noticed I missed someone’s Tumblr account, or linked the wrong one, please let me know!

[ahundredtimesover]

i was in tears reading the honeymoon chapter 😭 i miss OC and Kook so much 😭 i love love love how you managed to write about their thoughts and insecurities and them talking about it 😭🥺 communication is a must!!!

anyways!!!!! i just thought of asking you this! based on your CEO/boss/workmate list, which fic is your most recommended/screams must read?

i know is hard to choose hahaha i’m sorry 😞

Ahhhh thank you so much!! I'm glad I got to write the bits about them learning to love each other their way and the other person’s way. I'm glad you enjoyed it 🙂

Also! Okay I've learned to love those tropes and those stories but from that list, here are my absolute favorites which stuck to me and with scenes that are embedded in my head:

Second chances by @parkhabits (CEO jk) - OC and JK are on the brink of a divorce and the longing and the pain were so heartbreaking! But also really beautiful. I think about this story all the time.

Illicit episodes by @hoseoksactualass (CEO jk) - this one's pure smut but really, really good smut.

Not quite lovers by @junqkook (CEO OC) - I love the role reversal with JK as the assistant. The drama and the smut are 👌🏽

The proposal by @hansolmates (Boss JK, fake dating) - based on the romcom and I love the way this was set up, including that family holiday (Joon, Yoongi, & Jimin are wonderful here).

Rocket to the moon by @roseok (Workmates, roommates) - this is quite misplaced bc it's more of a roommates fic since there're just minimal interactions at work BUT this is one of my favorite fics ever. It's such a roller coaster ride of emotions & just beautiful.

Temptation series by @aiimaginesbts (Workmates, werewolf au) - I love the elements of a werewolf fic that's in here and the smut! And the drama! And this JK!

Cherry bomb by @bubblebeom (Workmates, bar au) - I think I scream about this fic whenever I can bc JK here is an absolute sweetheart. The flirting and the smut are wonderful.

Thigh-highs and neckties by @you-know-bts - Also pure smut but really, really good smut. With a sort of twist!

Cardiovascular palpitations pt1 + pt2 by @hayjeon (Workmates, hospital, fwb) - I love their relationship, the smut is great, and they're both idiots.

Dexterity + stupidity drabble series by @hueseok (Workmates, hospital) - The tension is wonderful and I love this JK!

re:untitled pt1, pt2, pt3, pt4 by @to-star-lake (arranged marriage, CEOs) - I realized this wasn't in the list but this is one of those stories that you think about for a looooong time. It's heartbreaking and so beautiful.

OKAY so that's 1/3 of the list haha and as you see, I love screaming about the fics that I love. I hope you enjoy these, and those on the list, too! ☺️

[youranxiousnerd]

Spring Break Thoughts

bc i want to get stuck in an airport and break into first class

spoilers below

EJ DOING THE INTRO

the most...profound intro?

“maybe it’s really about other people” looks at gina

i have jumped on the portwell train

when i first saw they were doing zoom backgrounds i was not on board, but they’ve grown on me carlos’ sucks

miss jenn and the zoom backgrounds

NI NI HEL LO

nini didn’t you get cut?

you know miss jenn they could get together out side of school (at least the kids who are here)

olivia is so pretty

aww carlos called miss jenn his madrina

HA I KNEW IT OF COURSE CARLOS INVITED SEB

seblos tension, ill get to that later

they’re so passive aggressive guys i love it

ASH AND EJ

CASWELL COUSINS YESSS

“You guys are watching like, old, old movies”

“This is why we’re soulmates” the redyln goal has been reached bye

this...this is the only line they get?

miss jenn has obviously not gotten the memo

three weeks and you havent blocked act two

“not it”

of course sebby is the last one to leave

“bye” awww miss jenn

GINA THAT LITTLE GIG YESSSS

just one complement after another ej

AHHHH EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YESSSSS

he looks so good ej should do it more often

ej fell hard guys

jack in the background doing tik toks i cant

gina and signs

RICKY IN A BLANKET

ugh its lynne

i dont care enough to spell her name right

“just being a burrito here”

bitter ricky, i feel ya

“I’m sorry to hear that’s it over” *smiles*

nini you should have just posted a video

ope empty notebook

awww ej’s insta

gina and jack

thats it

“she changed her name” nina is literally her real name 

the leg pull away

ricky and bedding is my new favorite ship besides therapy

“Your boy Jack”

when i first saw the promo for this nini scene i was worried it was gonna be another solo (shes had like 16)

I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE A RAINBOW HEART

my gay heart is bursting

nina really said “rainbows are awesome” this episode

and the necklace is off

guys i love improv scenes

it was so goood

soooo howie and kourt just get no closure after that killer song last week? no nothing? 

BAHAHAHA KOURTNEY BREAKING UP

i love kourtney

sofia is so pretty

okay i dont ship jack and gina but they’re fun together, little chaos demons

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT AHHHH

“my friends, like, my castmates, they think it sucks what you did on opening night”

good talk, long overdo. nothing is solved by any means but little steps

the therapy line omfg 

“HI, CUPCAKE”

“I’ll meet you in the pool” there is an ocean right behind you

 “Don’t ask me”

“Ashlyn, Big Red, Miss. Jenn, Carlos”

the way seb’s face just DROPS when he mentions carlos

“Are you guys fighting” big red looked so happy omfg

“That would imply that we’re speaking”

“Who has time to talk when you’re busy posting selfies with random guys in a cabana”

guys i had to pause for five minutes because i was dying

jealous seb... where did you come from?

ALRIGHT IT IS TIME TO TALK ABOUT SEBLOS!!!!

first off, it seems the writers love to make major seblos things happen off screen. examples include there pinning and officially getting together

where... where did all this tension come from? it has been light the past two episodes then bam, everything they say to each other is bitter. since when is seb jealous? the writers have so many other conflicts to talk about and they choose jealous seb? off all thing?!?! im honestly kind of disappointed because there are so many other things to talk about from previous episodes and instead they choose this?!?!?! hopefully this isn’t the only thing that is addressed next week, it cant be. they better talk about the constant “no seb” because its an issue. 

moral of the story is i hope the fight next episode isn’t about seb being jealous bc there is so much more to talk about

i am loving passive aggressive seb like i hope that doesn’t go away when their conflict is resolved bc it’s awesome

HERE are my thoughts on the zoom call

okay seb’s line about doing public makes sense with the full episode

everyone on the call is just like “wtf happened to my otp”

EJJJJ

EJJJJ I LOVE YOU

THE BEST EJ SCENE 

“Hi Nini!” ejjjj

you have to watch the scene twice, one to watch nini and ashlyn and another for ej

EJ AND THE PUPPET THATS IT IM DONE

sassy gina i love her

guys i just love everybody

ASHLYN AND NINI I MISSED THIS DUO GAHHHHHH THEY’RE ADORABLE

ej is a child i love it

ricky i feel you with the songwriting

look at big red being best friend of the year now give him a plot line

i am under the impression jack recorded gina 

SHIT THE CANDLE TO LAMP TRANSITION YESSSSS

i love transitions and that was it

matt is ripped

julia lester showed up this season. queen shit 

she is perfect

YES BIG RED AND KOURTNEY DANCING I WANT MOREEEE

i am so confused with seb’s gloves

that has been bugging me for two days 

carlos has more style then a hawaiian shirt and khakis

im in heaven the harmonies are soooo good

they are amazing they sound so good

you can hear all there voices

julia popped off

aint seen nothin is really good, i wasn’t sure about it at first but its grown. they sound so damn good the talent they hold. not the best song but its fun

the video actually looks better than i thought it would

“Wow” me too richard

jack is fun, i’d be okay if he comes back. he is a little chaos demon.

i like how the writers didn’t make them romantic (for once), hopefully gina got his number bc i would

i want to be stuck at an airport with jack

“let you go” is genius. so far the best original song this season. josh has been killing it lately. this is the ballad ricky deserves. lyrical genius. he sounds sooo good.

the one time i agree with lynne

EJ YOU CAMEEEEEE

OMFG THEY’RE ADORABLE

PORTWELLLLLLL BABY WHOOOP

HE IS GONNA TREAT YOU SO GOOD GINA 

HE BROUGHT YOU FOOD AND TOOK YOUR BAG 

GAHHHHHH 

nOoOoOoOo thats it?!?! i cannot wait a week i refuse

i normally don’t talk about promos but episode 10 (im a sucker for sleepover episodes) is my most anticipated episode so we gonna do it. 

for starters ricky has a guitar, so he might sing?

AWW THE SETS THEY ARE SO PRETTY

ooo lily is back?

blueprint?

ashlyn and ricky where have you been?!?!

seb and the girls yesss

since in a heartbeat is next episode seb probably leaves? i hope it is a private moment

oh please talk about your other issues pleaseee

“why did i never hear about this?” nina no, it was an accident alright?

gina and nini haven’t interacted this season and the first thing they do is fight.

lets hope there “beef” doesn’t take the a slot 

maybe another seblos kiss?

did you know i love seblos

i have stocked up my tears for next week

[washymylifeaway]

Haikyuu Angst fanfic recs

EDIT: I added in the ships for each fic LOL, prolly should’ve done it like that from the beginning smh my bad :’)))))

EDIT 2: I made a pt 2 linked HERE

No one asked me to do this, but I’m providing it anyway because we all need a little angst in our lives. Right? Anyway, this entire thing is going to be something you need to read warnings, tags, and summaries in advanced because everything here will be angst. Anyhoo, in no particular order, here comes the sadness... And also don’t come at me for putting fics I’ve recommended in the past,,,, it’s an angst post I have to put all of them.

WARNING: Almost all of these fics deal with either some sort of death, trauma, or mental illness so please I BEG OF YOU to proceed with caution. Also in NO way am I romanticizing any of these things, these fics recs are merely pieces I thought were written extremely well, and that portray major events from multiple perspectives skillfully. If you are struggling, please contact a hotline and get help, you are never in this alone!

National Suicide Hotline: 800-273-8255

boiled frogs by reginagalaxia (E) 91.5k /MatsuHana/ is it possible to hate a character this much? I never realized how much hate/rage I had in me. Really. Like. Imma boutta fight this MF LIKE SQUARE UP. The way I tried to manifest a fake characters death like,,,, Anyway. If my RAGE doesn’t explain how good of a freakin writer they are, then idk what will. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

In Another Life by LittleLuxray (T) 23k /BokuAka/ it’s a classic, what can I say? You into some BokuAka angst? Here’s the fic. Go right ahead. Don’t be shy :’)

the galaxy is endless (i thought we were, too) by cosmogony (T) 30.9k /KuroKen/ again, a classic. We do love a good soulmate AU tho :)))))))

^^ I didn’t write much here cause I wrote my general thoughts on a different post (linked here) so yea it’s not that I don’t like the fic, it’s just that I didn’t want to be more redundant than I already am LOL.

Oikawa's Last Wish/es by DanaiaCake (G) 5.1k /IwaOi/ this one, man it’s short but painful LOL. Proof that angst doesn’t have to be long to completely break you ahhahah. It actually has a sequel (which is less angsty), but yea if you like finish this fic and are like broken, read it for some.... glue?

The Sky and Guilt Are the Only Feelings I Have Left by oopsthisisqueertoo (NR) 267.7k /BokuAkaKuroo/ ngl I picked it up as a rec from someone else after misreading that it was THIS long haha. But like I kept reading, and the suspense omg. It HAS a happy ending, so if you’re reading it and you start to feel empty, push through (tho take breaks) and finish because it DOES end HAPPY. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

Made to be Broken by todxrxki (T) 8.1k /KuroKen/ this one focuses more on the after than the build up, and it made me so sad (as it should cause this is literally an angst fic rec post smh @ myself). I usually don’t cry too much but this one made the waterworks turn ON. Sighhhhhhhhhhh. Bless Akaashi.

Even Though it All Went Wrong by plumtrees (T) 9.2k /MatsuHana/ THIS IS THE REASON THIS POST CAME TO BE. I love this fic with all my heart (or what’s left of it). Like LOVE as in, this fic really broke me beyond just breaking me. Like. When Oikawa says what he says to Mattsun after the thing (you’re sorry __ _____ __ ____) and the Iwa right after (we know __’__ ___ ______ to make you ____ __ ____) (if you’re wondering wtf I’m putting here, just ctrl F you’re sorry and you’ll see), you cannot believe how hard that hit. GOD. (I am okay if you’re wondering :’)) This is my #1 favorite angst fic of all time and if you are okay mentally and have read the tags and warnings and are fine with them, then please read it. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

Better For Us Both by abrandnewheart (M) 15.7k /SakuAtsu/ THE MUG FIC. There was a sequel and when I saw that it took me another week to read it cause I was like,,, am I ready to have my heart break again? No LOL. But the sequel is actually not as angst, so if you want like a semi-broken whatever, just read the sequel LOL. It’s so sad and it made me physically hurt every time someone even mentioned mugs afterwards (LOL why am I so dramatic but it’s the truth :///). Go ahead and hurt with me.

Crumbling Foundations by Captain_Hughes_ZU, ToshiChan (T) 106.3k /MULTI/ I was debating whether or not to put this fic cause it actually doesn’t even have the angst tag (which I personally think it should). Honestly, it’s more a trauma fic than an angst fic idk I just wanted to put it somewhere because it’s written super well and although it was technically a ‘happy ending’ the interviews after prove else. Despite only being rated T, it’s got some intense TW so (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

arbitrary nature of thought. by wadingpool (NR) 5.6k /SunaOsa/ this....... ah... ahh.... The pain...... I really love the SunaAtsu friendship agenda. The ending was happy (I keep doing this LOL) but the build up to the break,,,,, AHHHH. Yea the ending was really heartwarming....... BUT THE BEGINNING. Yea it really jumbled me up..... JFLJDSFLKJHDLFHS

How To Be A Kick-Ass Brother: A Guide by Miya Atsumu by Egosdelirium (E) 25k /SakuAtsu + SunaOsa/ what personal vendetta do I have against Osamu? Nothing, literally nothing he just happens to always suffer in the fics I choose oops. This fic is one I really like, and it portrays the close outsider’s perspective on a horrific event really well. I was iffy on putting this in because it’s not really the angst type I was going for (more death less trauma?) but I really liked this fic, and while I was making my end note, I kept thinking about it so yea. Atsumu best boy. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

You might be thinking, done already? Wellllllll there were a lot of fics where I decided against putting them on (cause I felt like it didn’t really match what I wanted to be recommending but idk what the theme was LOL oops but yea I would look at a fic and think well it is angst but not the right TYPE of angst y’know?) and I really hate reading angst (there’s a lot of days where I shouldn’t cause my mental health said no thanks LOL). Also I wanted like FULL angst fics, but most of them have like happy endings (which made some of these iffy and is good but also it wasn’t what I wanted to put :////) So yes, I may add to this post (we’ll see) but like it’ll depend on whether I can convince myself that reading angst at 4 am is a good idea LOL. (pls recommend me some too!)

[juliandev0rak]

Heya! First i want you to know that your blog is wonderful and your hcs are really good!

So here it is- Main 6 (maybe add Valerius too if it's okay) with a really kind and soft MC who loves everything (even the simplest or silliest things) and is really sweet and loving to everything and everyone? Thank you!

Ahhhh thank you so much 🥺🥺🥺this was such a sweet message, and I love this request! We need more people like this MC in the world 💗

Asra

he loves to watch the way you love the world

you find joy in everything and it never fails to bring a smile to his face to watch as you smile at a stranger or stop to smell a flower you find on the edge of the road

sometimes he worries that the world is a hard place that will crush the kindness out of you, but he’s seen the strength you have under the surface, and he knows that being gentle doesn’t mean you’re weak

he tries to find ways to make your life even happier, bringing you flowers or taking you to his favorite places around the city to see your excitement

there was a time when he thought he might never see your sweet smile again, so he never takes a moment of your happiness for granted 

Julian

he’s truly never met anyone like you, someone who so genuinely sees the good in others

your outlook on life is so different from his bleak one, and he loves being able to see the world through your eyes instead

you find the beauty in everything and he hopes that someday that happiness and wonder will rub off on him

he loves to watch the way your eyes light up when you smile and the love he feels for you when you’re being so sweet feels nearly overwhelming 

at times he doesn’t feel like he deserves how kind you are to him, but you’re always there to remind him how worthy he is of kindness and love and every other good thing that life can bring

Nadia

she never mistakes your kindness as naivety, despite what others might assume

your softness is your strength and you remind her every single day to be better and to do better

in the stressful role of countess she sees so little kindness from others and she loves you for giving your kindness so freely without ever demanding something in return

she’s dealt with too many people who try to flatter her to get what they want but she knows that you’re being genuine

if someone takes advantage of your kindness she’ll be the first to stand up for you and make sure that you’re given the respect you deserve

Muriel

for so long he’s been alone with his pain, but now you’ve come along

he’s had to face all of the cruelty that the world could throw at him and he almost doesn’t know how to handle someone so kind and gentle

you treat everything in the world so kindly, from the smallest of creatures to your dearest friends, everyone you meet is treated with the same gentle sweetness 

he’s amazed at your ability to stay soft in a world so hard, at your ability to make him feel safe and worthy of kindness from others

you inspire him to be kind, to open up to others, and to see the beauty in everything, and it makes all the difference in his life

Portia

being with you is like seeing the world through the eyes of a child, the eyes of someone who chooses to see the good even amidst the bad, and it’s Portia’s favorite thing about you

your excitement for life, for the simple things, is something she shares with you and the two of you could spend hours in the garden soaking up the beauty of nature 

she thinks it’s endearing that you extend your kindness to everything, even if it’s just you trying to save a spider while she screams at you in fear to “GET RID OF IT!!!!” 

your first instinct is always to be kind, even when facing your enemies, and she wishes she could be more like that 

she calls you “sweetheart” constantly because you truly have the sweetest heart she’s every seen

Lucio

his whole life he’s been taught that being soft or kind is a sign of weakness and, in his world, only the strongest survive 

your kindness takes him completely off guard and he doesn’t trust it at first, assuming you must have some ulterior motive

when he learns that you really are as kind and gentle as you seem he’ll be unable to resist the pull to be just as kind and gentle to you in return

he loves to surprise you with things to make you smile, but he soon learns that what makes you happiest is watching him learn to be kind to others

you’re nice to everyone you meet and it reminds him to mind his own manners, if only to make you happy 

it’ll take him a long time to understand how you can stand to be so vulnerable and loving all the time, but he loves it about you all the same

Valerius

his first instinct is to assume you’re being fake, there’s no way someone could actually be so sweet to people they don’t know

he’s surprised that you continue to be so nice, even as he insults you and treats you coldly, until finally he’s forced to realize that you are as genuinely kind as you act

his personality doesn’t change much, he continues to insult you or try to make you upset, but your kindness in return always shakes him

he watches as you go about your days, smiling at everyone you meet and trying your best to make everyone feel accepted and seen even when they don’t treat you well in return

almost unconsciously he finds himself seeking you out, looking for someone kind to talk to in the midst of a palace full of plotting and uncaring courtiers

he doesn’t want to admit that seeing you smile is what gets him out of bed in the morning, he’s eager to see you smile again, if only from a distance