#it's probably just the depression though

[fuzzytrashbird]

i dislike that im not like 'casually' into things i am ""Lazily"" into things like i like Jujutsu Kaisen but i have not watched past season 1 since i watched it a while ago bc i just don't feel up to watching anime. i am also SUPER into Obey Me, but i'm also YEARS behind everyone else. i'm like on lesson 26 on the original and maybe 9 or 10 in Nightbringer bc i just don't feel up to reading

yet every time i look into content it's spoilers running rampant bc everyone is Actively into things and reading things or watching things as they happen/release and i don't even have the energy to go through and block tags so i don't see the spoilers and i know it's the easiest solution and it will save me so much but fuck man i barely have enough energy to not sleep 24/7 you expect me to go out of my way to fix this ?? nah i'm just gonna live knowing everyone in everything i like suffers greatly or dies tragically and vaguely how they suffer/die while also knowing i wont actually see or read it for another 5 years if ever

[tubbytarchia]

Someone's antlers fell off for winter

[tea-cat-arts]

Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

[mellohiizz]

dropping off some of my unstable universe art because im going insane and we got 3 episodes in like one week?? below is just some sketches i dont feel like finishing but you guys can have them too i guess

[aether-weather]

SAGESUNE MIKU >:DDD

[torchstelechos]

I do think its really important to remember that SY was suppose to be the villain character but its only because of his kindness and newly gained life that he didn’t end as one. In the very beginning of the story we learn that Peerless Cucumber Bro often left comments on how SJ didn’t get his dues and needed to be punished more, and only after he transmigrated did he acknowledge how awful of a death SJ had. He also made point to explain that he only read the book for LBH, which he noted to enjoy his decisive actions and deft ability to kill. Markedly, he liked his brutality and personality over the erotica that the majority of PIDW fans enjoyed. Peerless Cucumber Bro is someone who loves action and the ability to cut right to the chase, something that he does not do and most likely has difficulty with in his world.

Speaking of, it is something to note that Peerless Cucumber bro is rich. He had head chefs, he could pay for a 6k+ chapter book of erotica in 20 days, he noted that he could not understand SJs envy and ambition for power since he lives well, and he even noted to himself that his family was well off. He is incredibly wealthy, and it shows. Which is important to note because he, not once, showed any guilt or remorse on dying and leaving his family behind. Yes, he sometimes refers to people as being similar to his family but he never showed any pain for losing that life like he did when he lost LBH. This is important because I genuinely think SY was depressed and self destructive to himself, which goes against popular HC that he was chronically/terminally ill (I do like this HC and like how its portrayed in fanfiction). It would explain how he ended up dying all alone by himself, and how blase he was to his own life and death.

SQQ is a self destructive force who ended up dying three times, and didn’t feel anything about death itself. He was worried about others and the effect it had on them, but for himself it was up and on again like it never happened. He does not care for his health, had self isolated as SY to the point he died alone, and has a horrible self esteem to the point that he continuously agrees when other people put him down and often calls himself the villain. Even though we have seen the evidence of someone who is always being thrust into new situations and awful plots, he calls himself lazy and easy going. He hides his thoughts and feelings behind his fan and has a remarkably thin face. At the very base of his actions and his thoughts, he is self destructive, powerful, and smart. This is the set up for a villain.

However, when shown the actual people in front of him and forced to act as SJ did towards LBH and his disciples, he flinches from it. He notes that it happening in front of him was different. His entire self soothing comedy monologue went quiet when he had to enforce the Endless Abyss scene, and grieved for the childish innocence he killed from one of his favourite people. SY was set up to be the villain and obviously thinks of himself as one, but can not act as one. If he had the choice LBH would have been his sticky sweet white lotus disciple for as long as LBH wished to be.

His kindness, as seen in the book, is what turned him from being “the scumbag villain” to the protagonist we see in the novels. Which, yes, he is a protagonist! He even has the protag halo that LBH has and its very funny in the meta way for SQQ not to realize this, but thats for another post. But he loves his disciples, he loves his peak lord siblings, he loves his Binghe, he loves his new life, and he is kind. That is what kept him from being the villain he sees himself as, his kindness and love for others. Whether that be romantic, platonic, or familial, he loves the people he has met and he treats them kindly. That is why it is important to remember that he was set up as the villain by everything in the story we do not see, but what we do see is him continuously changing the story to fit a new genre that lets as many people as he can save live. Sorry sorry, I just think about SY being set up as a villain so much. It changes a lot of views I have on the series when I remember the duality of SYs story and character development.

[wishchip106]

i’ve made it a habit to post something right before i go to sleep 🤨

for tonight i am saying these guys got freaky before erik tried to kill his sister

thank you and goodnight.

[hazellvsq]

headcanon that hazel had the most parasocial beef imaginable with shirley temple. 8 year old hazel was writing hate mail to the local paper with her crayons calling the also 8 year old shirley a sellout and an industry plant. in 2010 hazel's watching nick at nite on the fifth cohort rec room tv and sees the 2 minute long shirley temple box set commercial and loses her fucking mind.

[ganondoodle]

having emotional outbursts about my hyperfixation, (NOT a meltdown - that is far worse and doesnt happen online and i wouldnt wish that on anyone bc it feels like you are posessed), its like my head is flooded with feelings and cant drain or process them fast enough, and the only outlet i have is to post about it, where people can see it (to no one doesnt work for some reason..) stupidly enough (i know its not the optimal outlet, i havent found anything else that worked .. its also hard to control impulses, and my first impulse is to talk about it, i dont have anyone in real life that cares to listen bc they dont understand anything .. i have to rant to people who know what im talking about? idk, its weird)

i feel like its much more a stress response to something i dont like happening to something i care alot about (that isnt something IRL), like a hyperfixation alot of my projects revolve around, which is why it only happens like this about negative things and not positive ones and why im fine shortly afterwards ... left feeling guilty/ashamed; the feelings have been drained and im feeling ok about, i probably still dont like it, but i can accept it, work with it (even if the response is "fuck that, im doing my own thing now")

the fact that i only get these outbursts about negative things might skew peoples perception of me, which i worry about since alot of things i care about happen here, and i dont like the thought of people thinking thats how i normally am when i am not; while positive stuff happens much more rarely bc i am neutral about most things and only love very specific ones (and even then keep it more to myself .. i also dont know why, fear of allowing yourself to be happy about sth bc then something really bad will happen? like it kinda even was that with totk, after the first trailer i was hyped up like never before, but it didnt take long for the anxiety to set in that it might turn out bad or how i wouldnt like ....... i think i have had this happen throughout my life and it really sucks that it kinda turned out like that again..)

[sesamenom]

some ideas from an au where maglor just keeps living in britain (/himring?)

especially in the earlier eras he had to put a lot more effort into styling/dyeing his hair to cover his ears & the blueness/Elf Sparkle. he also wore glasses for a while to dim the Treelight Eyes (because even as badly faded as he is, it's still really obvious with how old he is).

[nikothebookdragon]

to anyone not feeling the "christmas spirit" or any kind of cheer in fact, I'm sending you much love. we may be strangers behind screens but in spirit we are holding hands and getting through this together <3

[nu1lst4rs]

bllehhgg first week of school and i jave ten thousand exams!!! theophagy will be withheld until further notice (like 3 monrhs. i hayte school.)

anyways.. uhm throws this stuff onto everyone to make up for it

(this is a headmate!! /sys please be careful of that but idgaf about using it as ur pfp or something.)

[your-average-toast-enjoyer]

Omg it's finally winter solstice

THE DARK DAYS ARE OVER

I CAN WAKE UP AND SEE THE LIGHT AGAIN

[nathaniel-underwood-is-an-intj]

At first I thought Bartimaeus couldn't stand Nat's laughter because it sounded like the stereotypical megalomaniacal villain laugh and he was worried Nat was about to get even nore unhinged.

And then I realised it's just unsettling because he hasn't really heard Nat laugh much... or at all. In five years of knowing him not hearing him laugh once and now all of a sudden he's laughed twice? I'd find it creepy too.

[vinegar-n-salt]

SO niche but I love the idea of a yandere4yandere relationship where both the people in the relationship are insane about each other and one more person/other people (fuck it, polycule time) who very much does love both of them back, but that other person is very much aware how crazy (and morally gray/actually evil) they are to people that threaten their relationship so they just pretend that they don’t feel anything so they don’t get murdered. The two actively in the relationship are very much unaware that the other person/people are scared to their wit’s end of them finding out about their hidden feelings

[the-spooky-children]

Can't stop thinking about unhealthy co-dependent teen!fireskulls..