#it's over for me . good bye
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finally finished This Wip from Ever ago and so now i ask you ever look into another dudes eyes and suddenly want to do whatever he wants
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#professor x#magneto#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#the kids are here too but i aint taggin them vaeLKEVJKLJ#snap sketches#posting this now and not obsessing over the details i need to SLEEP#please click/tap and zoom to read anything im sorry theres so much dialogue#i thought i was gonna finish this sooner but i went grocery shopping with my bro today and that took longer than expected !!!!#ALSO CHAT. if youre up to date on My Lore via my tags ... my prof's lettin me submit my assignment ... life's so good...#speaking of life being good i was giggling like stupid while drawing this . i named it 'this is stupid' and i stand by that#this is so unserious im gonna make myself throw up ITS SO CORNY i make myself sick with what i draw <- will continue to do this#only god knows if this is even how that power of his works i just saw an opportunity and ran with it#the trick here is he doesnt even have to use any 'power' he can just do that to charles by default#however im making them be obnoxious about it. i am making them obnoxious over dramatic grandpas because i can#my only crime is loving the utter cheese and corniness of the 60s comics like God. anyways bye !!!!!!!#maybe one day ill finish that other comic i sketched for this weekend but i fear i wont have time to so next weekend me thinks ....#for now i hope you all enjoy this. goofy as hell nonsense jLAKJVEKLVJ
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finished mgs3 yesterday oh my goodness
#really enjoyed it. the ending got me so bad#game was SO LONG but still worth playing! had a good time#the boss is now my fav from that game i will never get over her thanks#you guys asked for doodles here have doodles#the boss#the joy#naked snake#big boss#eva#eva mgs#mgs3#snake eater#metal gear solid#ok bye
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cw: babies!!!! you’re also referred to as “ma” once
okay but like,,,,,first time dad Bakugou giving his baby their first bath after coming home!!! you’re fluttering around the kitchen, trying to make sure you have your daughters towel ready, her baby safe soap, a tiny washcloth, that her teeny tiny pajamas are in the dryer.
it’s only when you take a second to ask Bakugou something do you finally just—pause. your gaze instantly softens, a lovesick smile inching on your face as you watch your big buff pro hero husband hunch over the kitchen sink.
your daughter is resting in the baby bath seat, lilac colored and reclined back. she squirms when Bakugou lets the warm water run over her naked, fat little belly. her face scrunches at the new sensation, fists balling up against her chest. he coos at her, gentle,
“I know, ya little princess. Feels weird on ya, doesn’t it?” he asks her, voice so small under the running water. he cups his hand, holds a handful of water, tilts her fat cheek up to let it slide in her neck rolls that always smell like milk. she whines at that, sniffles and hiccups before she cries. you go to take a step forward, to console her, but Bakugou is so patient.
“It’s alright,” he kisses her tears away. “Daddy’s just tryna help you.” he runs the water all over her body, and paired with his softly spoken words, does she finally quiet after a few seconds. her little body trembles with the aftermath, pouty lips puffy and he can’t help but smooth his hand over the softness of her face.
“Yer a crybaby, just like your ma.” he whispers to her, grinning when that breaks you out of your stupor to smack him on the shoulder. you both laugh at that, and you finally feel the peace that is your little family. you lean against Bakugou’s shoulder, pressing a kiss to his jaw before looking at your daughter again.
“You’re gonna be a great dad,” you mumble into his skin. he doesn’t say anything, but you can feel his shuddering breath, and the calmness that blankets the rest of your house.
#ugly crying on the r floor#I thought about this earlier and forgot and then remembered again#and I was soooo happy bc I love this thought#first time baby baths were a nightmare with my niece LOL#she was colicky and hated everything so what was supposed to be a cute n sweet moment#was just her screaming to the tops of her lungs lol#but I believe bkg has a very well tempered first child which makes him want more#then the second one is HIM all over again and he’s like. thanks I’m good no more for me pls AKSJDKD#okay bye I’m gonna catch up on the dash 🏃🏽♂️#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#bakugou treats! 🍬#dad bkg
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Thinking about vampires, death, life, and the space they occupy in between
#to be or not to be. that is the question#ty adam for being my model for dramatic vampire moment#musings on the thinkings about:#when to live you are required to hurt others. you must repeatedly ask yourself what the value of your life is#To sleep... perchance to dream...#ah. THERES THE RUB.#ok I actually couldnt come up with too many thoughts. I had a lot more while I was drawing this but I guess I put them in the painting LOL#reading that soliloquy and being like damn this is just like vampires#the reality of course is that the soliloquy is a debate over suicide and ultimately making the choice to live#even if just out of fear of the unknown#and vampires are about dying and then in undeath choosing to continue to live#despite the fear of eternity and loneliness and hurting others#theyre not the same. but like let me thiiink come onnnn I'm allowed to thiiink and have incomplete thoughts#I would have to write like a proper essay about this to organize my thoughts. this is the tags on a tumblr post.#anyways finished episode 79#working on patreon stickers for this month (and next month soon)#and working on book 4. taking a pause from episodes cause I've got 3 weeks of buffer now... UGH#I'm so mad that they changed it. it would have been 5 weeks before but it's fine it's whatever#anyways yeah taking a break from episodes to make my book now!#its good stuff.#and this painting is good stuff#banger after banger from me tbh#this was a little relaxing giving myself a couple hours to muse#it's necessary for my health and I always forget that til I do a painting...#I loved doing the little landscape in the background too I should do that more! I love how plants are just like whatever shape you want#like you can make up any plant you want and not only does that plant PROBABLY exist somewhere#a weirder plant exists somewhere too. so. literally whatever you want#ok bye again for a few days while I get back to work
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the thing is. juno & nureyev's relationship has been such a major guiding thread throughout the podcast and the major drive of season 5, and the fandom has built itself so much (as fandoms often do) around shipping the two of them.
and yet nureyev doesn't show up at all in the last episode! or, he does, but it's only implied (for all we know it could be like. alessandra strong)(i know it's not but it would be really funny) and we don't hear his voice.
and it's so important to me that despite the room that their romance has taken in the plot and in our hearts, his absence reinforces that the point of juno steel's story wasn't a lady getting his man, it was about learning to grow as person for himself and for his friends (and not just his love interest), and it was about finding his footing in life and being at peace with himself and his place in the world. and he did! his growth and relative serenity is so apparent and just. a balm to the soul
and the fact that his man is back is just a nice add-on, not a necessity for his happiness
#juno steel#my aro ass has been sitting still and staring at a wall thinking about this ever since listening to this episode#mannnn i'm just. so completely floored about how good this finale was#juno's been all over the place and his growth has been up and down throughout but like.#it's so nice to hear just how. serene he was this episode#he's doing alright guysss#juno steel is fine#he's accepting affection and expressing it back#i Will be reading massive amounts of fanfiction about juno and nureyev'#s reunion when it comes out but i am super happy it wasn't a part of the episode#i was a bit bummed out for sure cos like. hearing his voice is always a good time#but there's a different between what i kinda want to hear and what i actually want out of the episode#and i got allll i wanted outta this one#also i'm super into urban planning (starting a masters in urban governance in september hihi) so the new town description had me 😈 meow#🤌🤌#juno steel spoilers#tpp#tpp spoilers#the penumbra podcast#i am soo excited to find out which mildly unpleasant to outwardly despicable characters the writers will make us love next as they grow#mannnn now im thinking about caroline again#back to staring at a wall bye
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this drawing is from a couple mouths back now; ......but i still like it 😝 forbidden love as witnessed by ms. Varona. it killed off my traditional art kick when i was done with it, but i had fun. i used very faint watercolors for this one just to see how well i'd do with them and pencils together. my favorite part of it is this tree, love how it looked in this WIP pic i took:
and some random bits of the drawing but closer because i do love pencils as yk✍
had to compress the whole pic a bit cus it was huge, but a version that's a bit better can be seen heare, still not the best it could be, still crunchy, but better nonetheless
#tes#skyrim#talvas fathryon#neloth#varona nelas#my art#second nelvas drawing on a full A4 format....... i should make another and have it be an incoherent trilogy#filling out big areas with black is literally no joke LMFAOO i wanted it to keep the texture so didn't really give it a much darker -#- watercolor backdrop#it's kinda Cute how u can see me go out of bounds with the watercolors in places Ok WERK#dramatized drawing for dramatization purposes bcos neloth isn't taller than talvas but i needed it for the power imbalance to happen Bye#nelvas been so good to me art wise this year i like to see it as me already perfecting my Thinking skill and devoting more time to -#- 'art' instead; while last yr i was just trying to mold my thought pattern on skyrim characters to perfection instead#instead of focusing it on 'art'.#not related to the whole shtick of 'drawing the same characters over and over and getting better' cause i don't like that viewpoint people#- have on their drawings; i'm getting better because i want to ..... and i have something special going on with talvas fathryon...exactly#i'm very......in touch....with my.......nelothian side!#(diagnosis sheet)#i'm sorry for being a reincarnation of him in this timeline it really is a tragedy
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I’m actually scared of alienating some of my followers and moots with all the trans discourse I’ve been steeping quietly in and contemplating, but… I’m trying to not let being scared shut me up about this. That, in and of itself, is erasure and silencing.
Fuck staying quiet. Trans men and mascs deserve a voice, and we, as a group, are not oppressing or invalidating anyone else by using that voice. (Obviously there are shithead exceptions!! Anyone can be an asshole.)
I really hope that if I ever speak about any of this in the future, that people recognize that it’s not ever, ever trans femininity as a concept I have an issue with. It’s people who
- try to divide the community
- are reinventing gender essentialism from the ground up but make it trans
-police other people’s identities and decide for them what oppression they must face because of a tiny set of superficial traits
- simply. Don’t understand what intersectionality means.
- disregard and invalidate anyone who doesn’t fit a very specific (binary, rich, white, abled, flawlessly passing) idea of what it means to be trans.
None of those things are specific or exclusive to one identity. There just happens to be a community of transfems who are currently espousing many of these ideas as gospel. They are understandably defensive because of real actual transmisogyny they face. But other trans people are not your enemy. Accusing anyone and everyone who tries to point these flaws out as radical transmisogynists is simply not true. Pointing out bigotry is not bigotry in itself.
I don’t want the trans community to constantly be at each other’s throats. We each have to sit down and think if we ever catch ourselves blaming an entire other marginalized group for our issues. That’s just fascism babes.
#I don’t remember who and I’m sorry if this was you#but I saw a LOOOOOONG time mutual put a post sewing transfem v masc discourse and I just#can we not. we all have issues. why don’t we like… help each other with them instead of proving x or y have it ~worse~#but also for real the threats of violence and anti masculinity ‘jokes’ going around have really been getting to me#fucking. stop it. *bap bap bap bap bap bap* it’s not feminism to ascribe negative traits to an entire group of people#it’s not woke to put down an entire identity.#transandrophobia#transmisogyny#trans discourse#trans#trans unity#transfeminism#if anyone calls a tme theyfab over this post I’m launching into the sun#good bye guys. going to step into traffic and get isekaid to eorzea where I can live with my beautiful transgender catgirlboy husbandwife#my post#hopefully this doesn’t start *too* much shit because I’ll be for real I’ve blocked half the people on these tags#this started as a thing addressing those moots though so. my target audience is not blocked lmao#me: has political opinions also me: DONT HATE ME IM NORMAL I SWEAR#I mean. fuck being normal. just not bigoted. I’m just tired of being the butt of every joke#and being blamed for something I had less than nothing to do with
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im just imagining nandermo in a very enclosed space like for some reason they gotta be chest to chest pushed up against a wall and its awkward for a moment but then nandors eyes are just boring into guillermos and guillermo has that uncertain but unwavering stare too, and is this what is gonna take for them to kiss?
#at this point im just running all scenarios in my mind and spilling all my thoughts about them into the ether#i swear i am not fine#they kiss nandor blurts out i love you please dont ever leave me please dont die#and they share their feelings while kissing and bang against that very wall while telling the other how much they mean to them#nandor expecially is a flood of YOURE SO AMAZING GUILLERMO I LOVE YOU PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE#im going INSANE over them hahahaha#guillermo is too stunned and enjoying the physical sensation to be so close to nandor and to see nandor be so vulnerable#nandermo#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#atp im just saying whatever insane shit is passing through my head at any given moment. but thats what tumblr is for basically you will#forgive me about it. i just am a very physical person and i think a physical moment is always very good to unfuck a totally fucked dynamic#like talking of course would be preferrable but these two have so much shit under the bridge#that theyre sort of stuck in this ‘the love is requited they are just idiots’ cycle#annnnyway#bye#some messy liveblog tag#comment#*
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This is it, this is finally my last straw
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sighh late night extra bc i got pissed off and what i feel she feels
#futaba sakura#persona 5#futabadoodles#i hateee neurotypical people#ive calmed down since then but i got screened for adhd and she dismissed me a lot for not being stereotypical enough#and the POSSIBILITY that it was anxiety even tho i said like ten times it wasnt. pissed me tf off i swear#and i wouldnt have been given any information on how to get a proper diagnosis if i hadnt been like uhh ????#and i thought this was like a starting point to being refferred to someone else to go thru the process but i guess not??#like i have been screened before girl ik 😭 like i definitely have adhd and genuinely i think the only way im getting like#denied. would be w this stupid ass bs about not being stereotypical or struggling enough. anyways uh#i will be getting a proper diagnosis chat🫡#hopefully this time theyll actually look for both autism and adhd bc all the good ones do that 🙂↕️🙂↕️#and i suspect i could be autistic but im FAR less sure on that one than i am adhd thats up to them to say ya know#rant over bye bye
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personal happiness or what the fuck ever
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#jeans here too but ssh#snap sketches#i havent posted anything in what feels like forever and i GUESS i have to remind people i do draw sometimes. whatever.#aka in my brain i have at LEAST a five-page doujin where this gets incredibly nsft but i dont have TIME for that these days do i#so for now we get just. these scribbles. ill be able to make something exemplary again someday i swear <- optimistic#i think im going to close my comms off for the rest of december once i get through the batch i have now#which ... doesnt sound hard since the amount i have will probably take me to the end of december anyway 💀#i just need everyone to believe me i have better visions for yaoifying issue 309 .... the opportunity is right there...#like wdym the dream sequence is gon end on a panel of erik's eyes as he reinforces the idea charles needs happiness like scott and jean's..#call up your ex. right now charles.#what got me peeved about this issue is i have no idea what color eriks outfit could be vjaeLVKEJARK its like.#is he wearing a lab coat over a suit .... i think thats the intention ... or maybe it is a trench coat....#idk shit for me to figure out if i ever get the time to explore this thing again#LIKE UGH IM SCREAMING i have Such Visions that i dont have time to execute and theyre killing me#maybe ill just write them down idfk <- trying to write fanfiction ends even worse for me than trying to draw#anyways. im gonna drive myself mad good night everyone#i have to go to a christmas party tomorrow night. later tonight. whatever.#BYE
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downtime
#sorry guys the hospital yuri brainworms took me over again#it’s just. such a good time#almost makes you forget the impending horrors#maybe in a sweeter life that bubble wouldn’t need to be broken#it could just be all that there is#but for now they could still have this#and as much as that kills me what could be more wonderful than that?#fuck. i hate them#i didn’t ask for these emotions TAKE THEM BACK#you know what to say#partners (affectionately derogatory)#vash#vash the stampede#wolfwood#nicholas d. wolfwood#vash x wolfwood#vashwood#trigun#trigun maximum#ok bye
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yesterday twas my mission to completely memorize the (mark 4) hev suit
#something took over me idk#ive been incredibly art blocked lately#its not completely accurate but yk..#my stuff#half life#hl1#gordon freeman#halflife#half-life#also sims 1 music is so good……#one part of one of the songs is used again in the later games as a sound effect#if i remember right#and it jumpscared me so bad#YEAG WHEN YOU COMPLETE A WANT IN TS2 ITS 26 SECONDS INTO NEIGHBORHOOD 3#i should show u guys my sims2 black mesa dorms omggghghg#ok Bye#also this made me realize i always put the circle (flashlight??) on the left instead#why did i do that???? idk#maybe some mirrored promotional art Idk
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It's my right to tell myself I can do just a little animation just for fun just for really quick to do some action and then spend 3 days straight on it
#animation#we were legion#2d animation#sketch animation#sketch#zagan#I jut really like drawing action okay...#Time and time again is too nice of a comic ykwim its like all about grief and forgiveness and self love#so the whole point is that there's other ways and we will always try for something better#and we will grow together#BUT NOT THIS COMIC!!!<t#this comic is about a demon who is a complete asshole and resorts to violence over literally everything!#he like gets better#but there's still action the whole time...#cause its not about anything serious its about like hey maybe theres OTHER things you can do that are cool#and that violence immediately isn't the best way to go...#but like sometimes violence is allowed#and so even in the end once he's better as a person#there can still be fights#YAYYYYYY#I love action AHHAHAHAHA#its so much fun to draw#ughhh#such a fuckin wonderful way to explore my love of anatomy and dynamic poses#like YES yes yes yes yes yes yes#let me draw a guy at like 100 different angles and they all have to match up believably#PLEASE GOD ITS SOO GOOD I LOVE IT#also I keep watching the animation. I like how it came out a lot...#ok bye.
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Putting a collar ‘n leash on Lucifer <3
#he gets all relaxed in puppy subspace trusting you’ll take care of him#and you do!!!-#pamper your sweet sub (Luci needs it)#soft kisses and sweet praise#maybe peg him- but not rough and hard…..it has to be slow soft thrusts and more sweet praise until Lucifer’s gasping#and cumming all over the bed underneath him.#then a nice hot bath together tell him how good he was for you and how much you enjoyed taking care of him <3#lunchtime thot~#subby Luci’s been on my brain all morning wtf#obey me!#obey me lucifer#obey me smut#om!#luci <333#i blame this thought on the subby Lucifer asks I got- I’ll answer them soon I promise!!!!#‘kay bye <3
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#ryu ga gotoku#rgg#yakuza series#ryu ga gotoku 7#yakuza like a dragon#yakuza 7#daigo dojima#ryo aoki#masato arakawa#snap sketches#im annoyed looking at this jaGELARKGJ#I LIKE MY LNIE ART BUT .... just nthing was clicking with me rtying to shade this#i only meant for this to be a quick thing today but i ended up mulling over it for longer than i wanted so im just throwing it out there#every time i make a rendered drawing of aokis office it always dark as hell like bro PLEASE you have a lamp#theres like ONE instance where i dont make it dark and it was in that goofy Rumor Mill comic#LIKE EVEN THAT COMIC ABOUT ARAKAWA BEING DEAD IT'S DAYTIME YET I STILL MADE IT DARK VJLAKJVAE#ridiculosu.#moving on ive wanted to draw them playing chess for months i just kept. Not Knowing How To Do It#whats funny is that i initially was planning an entirely different thing but i was thinking about that too much i got stressed#so . thats why i worked on this. and then i got stressed over this 💀💀💀#speaking of chess ive always wanted a chessboard birthday cake with edible pieces .. that a lotta work tho ...#i love chess ... am i good at it probably not but i still lke to play it on my phone sometimes ..#guess ill work on that other thing now that im free and i know what i wanna do now that ive slept on it ... lol ...#mk bye i dont like rendering
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