#it's not the most complicated thing buuuuut I think it's cute

[daily-awoken-vessel]

dribbling little ghost like the basket ball

Most important way to enrich your sibling

[lumiereandcogsworth]

you may have already talked about this so forgive me buuuuut what were Belle and Adam's reactions to each pregnancy? and their baby's reactions as they joined in on the fun of learning they would be getting siblings?

i have been SO excited to answer this all day. i love pregnancy discoveries/announcements SO MUCH i just think they’re so cute. (i mean, they can certainly be Not Great news, but in otp land!!!! CUTE!!!!) so without further ado, let’s get INTO IT!!

okay for their first baby… gosh i’ve probably written and rewritten this scene twenty different ways over the years. this is the BIG ONE!! the moment they go from a married couple to PARENTS!!! it’s HUGE it’s LIFE CHANGING!! i think about it all the time. and i think after all these years i finally have a scenario that i’m most happy with, that i’d really love to write and sort of insert into my canon, but just haven’t finished yet. and the funny part is that i’ve already written The Conversation™️ i just have to set it up and context and story and all that jazz. but anyway, i think it’d be such a big thing for both of them.

for belle, she really never imagined she’d get to be a mother. and i think the idea of motherhood, in a way, sort of scared her. she LOVES children for sure, but i think growing up in the village with no real prospects, no chance of getting out and being free, the idea of becoming someone’s domestic little housewife and homemaker was just such an awful idea to her. she wanted true love, she wanted a family of her own, but she just didn’t want it to be in that little provincial town with no hope of escape. and marrying someone and having their kids would just tether her there forever. and she wanted more for herself!!

so then, when she marries, idk, THE PRINCE? and becomes THE QUEEN? everything just changes. she’s not just some guy’s little wife. adam would rather die than let that happen. adam believes in her and pushes her to be as incredible as he knows she is. she has so many responsibilities in her role, she’s a freakin powerhouse!!! so when she does end up pregnant, almost a year after they get married, she’s actually quite excited by it. because she Knows she’s so much more than a homemaker. she doesn’t have to compromise herself to be a wife and mother, as she had once feared. she gets to have a baby with the love of her life and still fulfill all her own dreams. she can really do it all, your honor! so, in short, realizing she’s pregnant that first time is exciting and a huge relief knowing this isn’t the end of her life, just another chapter.

for adam it’s more like AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH !!!??!! PANIC PANIC PANIC WORRY WORRY WORRY !!!!!! but i can elaborate further. essentially, adam was never really keen on fatherhood. surprise surprise, having an abusive father and growing up suppressed and bullied and then directionless and scared and all that… didn’t really enthuse him on the idea that he’d be a great parent for any kid. despite that, of course, he did know deep down he would have to have an heir at some point. probably with some random woman who was deemed a politically advantageous match, someone he didn’t care about, the way he didn’t care about anything. but he ignored that prospect as often as possible, the same way he ignored all his other royal responsibilities. BUT! NOW? he Loves his wife……… he loves his wife so much and everything is different now. he’s a changed man now. he’s trying so hard to see the goodness in the world now. everything is brighter and it’s scary but he’s strengthened by her and supported by her and loved by her and… and… she’s pregnant 🥺

i’ve written this scene so many different ways mostly because adam’s reaction is just so��� complicated. he wouldn’t be angry but i don’t think he’d be overtly happy either. he’s changed, he’s grown, but “fatherhood” is such a Deeply Rooted issue for him that i think when belle tells him, he just doesn’t even react at first. he knows he loves her and knows, logically, this is a good thing, so he holds her and starts worrying about her and starts processing this great big change in his life. and he fears becoming his father, despite the fact that it’s his mother’s kind heart beating inside him. and belle tells him there is no one else on this earth she’d rather have children with, because no one would ever believe in her the way he does. the way she believes in him. so they have lots of reassuring talks over the course of the pregnancy, and of course, that beautiful day when their first little one finally arrives, it’s just magic 🥹

GAH! first baby euphoria consumes my soul. i could talk about it forever, clearly. but i’ll move on to baby number TWO!

i actually HAVE written this fic of belle telling adam!! it’s a couple years old now so i’m tempted to not link it but it’s still how i imagine it happens in canon so it’s okay. i shan’t cringe at my old writing!! anyway, it’s christmas 1743 when belle tells adam they’ll be spending NEXT christmas with one more little angel than this year 🥰 adam is a lot happier on the second round, now that he’s been a father for a bit of time, now that he’s positively fallen in LOVE with his daughter, he’s more excited to keep growing their family. renée, however, is not even two yet when this is happening, so she really doesn’t have any thoughts about it lmao. HOWEVER, once her baby sister arrives, she is Not enthused by the sudden lack of attention. i’ve written a cute one about that so i’ll link that as well <3 i really want to write the moment renée meets juliette, i think it’d be sort of funny considering how young she was, but i just haven’t gotten around to it. my fic about the day juliette was born is already so hectic for other reasons, so it just didn’t work to write renée into it.

LASTLY!!! LE PRINCE!!!! it’s like you’re in my HEAD bro because just Yesterday i got a cute idea for how this pregnancy may be discovered. (and i have considered multiple possibilities, this is just the latest and greatest). i was imagining perhaps juliette (age 4) comes down with a cold of sorts, so belle’s been taking care of her. then belle starts to feel sick, and she just brushes it off thinking she caught juliette’s bug. but then juliette gets better and belle is still feeling like GARBAGE. and eventually it clicks that it’s because she’s pregnant <3 i think this third one catches them both off guard just a bit because the girls came so quickly one after the other and then it’s been almost five years and nothin??? i mean it’s the 18th century it’s not like they were doing anything to prevent it. (i am aware of 18th century contraception methods but these two definitely were not using them lmao). regardless, when it finally clicks, adam and belle are both just sort of like “oh shit!!!! NICE!!!!” lmao. they had gotten settled in life with their two girlies, but they’re certainly not mad about adding to their number 💖

as far as the girls’ reactions, i would also like to write that some time, but haven’t yet. in general, i think renée (who was very nearly 7) just EXPLODES with a million questions. she’s also very adamant that this baby Must be another girl (spoiler alert: it was not💙) and she’s just in general trying to be as obnoxiously involved as possible. she’s always tossing out name ideas (usually characters from the books she’s reading, but also lots of flower names like chrysanthemum and hyacinth). she also loves putting her hand on belle’s growing bump and asking “what’s the baby doing now??” like 20 times a day. (she loses her mind whenever she feels him kick🥹)

juliette, on the other hand, takes a long time to process it (it’s the autism, but also she’s just younger). but it sort of helps that, at the time, lumiere & plumette were already expecting their second child. so adam & belle could be like “you know how auntie plumette is gonna have a baby soon? well now so are WE!” and juliette’s like “oooooohhhhh 🤔 (doesn’t get it at all).” but when that baby arrives (a lil lad named xavier🥰🧡) juliette gathers what’s going on. that is a BABY. she does like feeling the baby in mama’s tummy move as well, it’s very wild to her. she’s much more quietly curious about her future little sibling than renée is, but she’s just as excited when they do finally meet him. which i HAVE written 🥹🥹🥹

AND, juliette gets the credit for giving her little brother his lifelong nickname. when her parents told her they were naming him maurice, she very quietly replied “hi, reece☺️” and he is forever called reece/reecy by his family and friends henceforth 🩵 (it also helps to differentiate from his beloved namesake grandfather!)

renée isn’t super excited about having a brother instead of another sister, (especially when lumiere and plumette already have TWO boys. (ENOUGH WITH THE BOYS IN THIS GOSH DANG CASTLE!!!😒)) but she does come to love him!! even though he’s annoying as hell!!! but it’s his gotdamn right as the little brother💛

[mrs-dynamight]

Be Nice To Me 2

Part 1.

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Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x fem!Reader, Denki Kaminari x fem!Reader

Warnings: Eventual mature content, angst, hurt/comfort, love triangle, the reader is lowkey toxic, everything will be adressed in every episode (:

Chapter warning: Swearing but just a little bit of it. Mentions of past relationships between the 1A students. Everything else is pure Fluff.

Chapter: 2/? Still don't know how long this is going to be, I just have so much to write ;-;

Synopsis: You're in love with your best friend Bakugou, and you're cofessing to him but things get a lot more complicated when Denki starts to treat you different *wink wink*

Word count: 1.7k

Author's note: I love friends to lovers troupe sm, this chapter and the next one gave me butterflies writing it O=w=O

Chapter 2 Do you want to die together- Stars

We walked the rest of the way talking about hero equipment and how much of a cry baby he is and about that new shojo magazine every girl (and Bakugo ofc) have been reading.

In the front door of the UA was Ochako and Tsuyu, they saw us walk together and gave me a thumbs up, I was so embarrassed that I could feel my heartbeat in my throat. Bakugo just said his usual “Tch” and kept walking, I just said “see ya” and waved. As I walked towards my friends I noticed a strange look on their faces so I asked them if there was something wrong.

-Y/N, you really like Bakugo- Said Ochako with a big grin in her face

-I mean yeah, I guess that I like him a lot- I say a bit embarrassed and a light pink flush in my cheeks

-No but, you actually love him, we can tell just by looking at you- Said Tsuyu followed by a classic Tsuyu “Kero”

-I can’t believe you haven’t made a move yet, I think he likes you back, I mean it’s Bakugo, you can never tell, but you are way too obvious, since day one- Said Ochako

“Since day one…” I think my friends knew I was falling for him way before I did, besides that I didn´t wanna admit that I had feelings for my friend.

The first one to notice was of course Tsuyu-Chan, she saw us coming out of the gym one late afternoon and I was mocking him about how ridiculous was every option he had for his hero name and Bakugo being Bakugo was angry as he can be, telling me how “an extra like me” would never get an awesome name even if it punched me in the face.

-You like him- Said Tsuyu, it wasn’t a question, and it didn’t have any rude intentions, for her it was a mere fact.

-WHAAAAT?? Fcourse not- I said blushing.

-Y/N, I’ve seen how you look at him, you even blush when he addresses you- Tsuyu said.

God, what if she’s right?

-He’s just my friend, maybe a little crush, I’m sure it’ll pass -

But it didn’t, if anything only became more painful obvious and difficult to handle, I caught myself staring at him in class, thinking about him any time I saw something spicy, every time I saw a Pomeranian my head automatically went “Bakugo”, any skull related thing had his face imprinted in my mind, every song had his drums in it, even when watching fashion shows with the girls at UA dorms made me think about his family issues. It was undeniable I was falling deeply in love with Katsuki Bakugo. I didn’t wanna ruin our friendship, so I just sucked my feelings up and keep on with our routine like I wasn´t completely captivated by everything that boy did. That was until I decided it was enough. It was now or never, the last year, I had to make my move.

That was one of the longest weeks in my whole student life, I spend most of the time avoiding any kind of contact with Bakugo, and it was obvious to everyone, I usually hang out a lot with the whole Bakusquad, but this time I just simply started walking the opposite direction every time I crossed them in the hallways.

-Are you sure you’re doing the right thing avoiding him completely? - Said Deku with a concerned look in his face

-I just don’t wanna say something stupid in front of him and have him regretting having a date with me- I replied giving a big much to my lunch

-I’m sure he thinks that anything anyone besides him say it’s stupid, so I wouldn’t worry about that Y/N- Said Shoto

-Yeah, and besides, you were the one who said that you didn’t wanna ruin your friendship, so don’t do it and just keep everything normal- Said Ochako.

Normal… Nothing will be “normal” again between us after today, in the worst scenario possible we will stop talking, our friendship will be ruined completely and there will be no turning back to how things were before; in the best, the feeling is mutual and we start dating. Dating Bakugo, I’ve pictured it a hundred times before, but now that it might happen… No, focus Y/N there is still a long way before that actually happens, first I have to survive today without throwing up all these years of butterflies in my stomach.

It’s finally the last class for today, just this last one, going back to the dorms for a quick shower and a change of clothes, and I’ll be having my first date with the boy of my dreams; but before I entered the room someone grabbed my hand and pulled me into an empty classroom, it was Denki Kaminari.

-Denki wha…- I started saying but he interrupted me abruptly

-I don´t know what I did Y/N but please talk to me again, I’m so sorry if I did or said something wrong, I’m really really sorry but please don’t ignore me like that- He said with tears in the corner of his eyes.

Me ignoring Denki? Oh shit, I didn’t thought of that when I was avoiding Bakugo, I didn’t even realized it, was so worried about don’t messing it up before today that I forgot that his friends were also my friends

-Denki I’m so sorry, you didn’t do anything wrong, it’s my fault I was so caught up with my stuff lately, I didn’t realize that I was ignoring with my friends-

He looked a little confused when I said that, he looked directly in my eyes.

-You weren’t ignoring me specifically? – He almost sounded offended

-Of course not, I guess I was being distant with everyone but you were the only one who noticed it, I’m sorry Denki- I went for a hug but he stopped me

-You don’t have to apologise Y/N, is just that I wanted to talk to you this past days but anytime I ran into you, you seemed to run away from me and I just, I don’t know, I thought you didn’t wanna be my friend anymore and I was so scared and…-

This time he didn’t stopped me and I hugged him. He put his head in my shoulder and sighed.

-I wanted to be like this for so long- He said wiping the tears in his eyes and looking away

-We should head to class, if we are late again Aizawa will kill us- I said grabbing Denki’s sleeve, but he stopped me.

- Y/N wait, I wanted to talk to you, it’s kinda important- He was as red as an apple and his eyes were fixed on his shoes.

Is Denki Kaminari confessing to me?!? I mean, yeah he has always been kind to me, and we do spend a lot of time together, and have sleepovers with mina and sero, and I go to every one of his gigs, and that box of chocolates for valentines, and those playlists, and the pinterest moodboard, and… Oh fuck, Denki Kaminari likes me. Before I could say or think anything he says:

-I have a gig next week, I know you come to every one of them, but this one is special and I would love seeing you there, not like the others weren’t special, because they were, you know how much I like when you come to see meUS! I was thinking maybe arrive a little earlier with me, to the soundcheck, I know it’s a little boring buuuuut I get really nervous if you’re not there and I just…, please come with me next week- He was clearly a handful of nerves, and knowing Denki he rehearsed that words over and over, he was so cute.

What? I could have sworn he was going to tell me something else, but a Gig? I’ve seen every performance ever since the first one at the cultural festival from first year, he didn’t have to get so nervous for that, unless there is something else he isn’t telling me, or maybe I misinterpreted all of it, maybe it was actually something special and he is afraid of asking anyone else for emotional support, yeah that makes sense, we always have been there for each other when things got tough, when he found out that Jirou was in love with Momo in first year he spend a whole week crying in my dorm, when he and Shinso broke up I had to force him to come out of his bed and act like a semi-functional human being, that was a whole semester of romantic comedy, sad music and junk food, thank god we both passed the year; it makes sense he came to me if he was feeling nervous about anything, nothing more, right?

-I would love to, Denki, I love seeing you on stage. I didn’t knew you get nervous when performing- I say with a chuckle.

-Well I usually don’t but this time I’m going to sing a song, and let me tell you, the struggle is real, have you heard Bakubro criticism? In the last rehearsal he made me cry five times-

Denki is going to sing?! OMG, usually Jirou is the one who takes the lead vocals, he just sings the harmonies, I’ve only heard him actually sing in karaoke nights, this is going to be so much fun, of course I wouldn’t miss it for anything in the world

-Yeah, Bakugo tends to be a real pain in the ass sometimes, but don’t worry I wouldn´t miss this gig for anything in the world-

-Pinky Promise? – Asked Denki with his best puppy eyes

-Pinky promise- I replied intertwining our pinky fingers and feeling a little electrical buzz

-OUCH! What was that for? – I said giving Denki a playful punch in the arm

-That was for ignoring me all week, I really missed you Y/N- And then he lean in and kissed my forehead -Now let’s go before Aizawa wakes up and see we are not in class, I don’t want to clean the common room in the dorms, again-

“And before someone sees us and thinks something wrong” I thought to myself.

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Part 3 here

OMG! I have so much fun writing this, remember if you want to be in the tag list just message me, hope you enjoy reading it as I had writing it

[tfw-no-tennis]

ani....morphs.....

ok so picking up after the david trilogy, which hit hard as FUCK, we have book 23, which basically was a semi truck that ran over my corpse, jesus christ, they really followed up the david trilogy w/all that....

23 was so so good and also painful. its the culmination of a lot of tobias’s characterization in the series thus far and also we finally get the reveal we’ve been waiting for about elfangor....ooooh man 

and there was a lot of painful stuff in this book but the worst imo was tobias wondering if it were possible that somebody wanted him and would take care of him, only to have it all come crashing down in the worst way when it turned out aria was visser three in morph, ouch. 

that was so brutal augh. and when he figured it out and just crash landed and kept thinking about how he wanted to die and how he was stupid to think he could have a home...bro get these kids some THERAPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

so yeah that book was absolutely brutal but also so good...and it further fleshed out the animorphs working as a near-flawless team, w/the whole setup of tobias meeting w/the lawyer being so airtight and well-planned 

also more free hork bajir!! its cool that there's stuff happening w/them offscreen, I like that 

I literally had to take a break from reading the books bc the david triology + 23 was like so much, and also bc the olympics were on and all my time got dedicated to watching those, but then I opened 24, not sure what to expect, and BAM it was the helmacrons lmaoooo

I don't even remember the helmacrons but ig a lot of people hate them? lmao so that whole reputation preceded the book and I was like oh wow time for a change in tone

which wasn't wrong but also I liked that book?? I was never bored, even tho the whole thing was patently ridiculous and also had very little bearing on the overarching story

but I think it would be a standout if it were a TV episode w/a good budget - the visuals were amazing even in text, and I can imagine all the cool shrinking/growing/cellular stuff would be WICKED cool visually (ideally 2d animation but an ant man-esque live action adaptation wouldn't be terrible if they had the budget for it)

whatever let me dream. so yeah I didn't hate the helmacron book even tho the helmacrons themselves were...sure something. lmao I think they come back? that should be interesting

next book is the arctic one, we have yet another alien of the week style adventure - I liked this one too, it felt like more plot-y stuff happened since they destroyed the base, and marco’s POV is always fun 

I do find it funny/interesting how sometimes when the animorphs do something - like in this book, destroying that base in the arctic - it doesn't really seem to impact the yeerks much/it doesn't get brought up much after that. and then other things like them destroying the ground-based kandrona get mentioned a lot (that example is understandable tho bc that WAS a big deal). its just hilarious to me how blowing up entire building complexes has become so routine that it isn’t even worth mentioning at this point

Also I adore when they meet other random people/kids and are chill w/them, like w/that kid they met in the rain forest earlier on w/the time travel 

the descriptions of the brutally cold weather were great. I hate the cold so I was like oof this is a nightmare lmao

also ig that was the first ghostwritten book and I did kinda notice it was slightly different than usual? maybe? I could be imagining it tho 

okay but book 26 tho...BOOK 26. bruh 

that was SO good and I really didn’t know what to expect - but when we finally revisited Jake’s dream w/crayak I knew it was gonna be good (but I didn’t expect it to be a chess game war epic..!)

basically I loved it. SUCH a good Jake book - I really appreciate his character now as opposed to when I was 10 and often overlooked him (sorry jake).

similarly, when I was a kid and read these I sympathized a lot w/the chee and felt bad for them towards the end of the series when they had to get more involved in the war (genuinely don’t remember what they even do but ik I felt bad) 

but now I've basically 180′d and I'm like damn those chee sure are hypocrites huh. 

like they could solve So many of the animorphs problems but their stringent adherence to nonviolence leads to them actively getting in the animorphs way sometimes? and obviously pacifism is a complicated topic, but in this case it also intersect w/the whole ‘child soldier’ thing, and as beings who are insanely old and wise, the chee probably shouldn't just leave all the dirty work to a bunch of literal middle schoolers

aaaaanyways. there’s so much I love about this book. the iskoort! they were sure something. and the ‘plot twist’ that they are actually 2 beings, the Isk and the Yoort - and the Yoort are essentially Yeerks - that slapped. the symbiosis of it all! 

I loved the part where they all realize what this means, that this is why Crayak wants the iskoort destoryed - because someday the yeerks might come across them and realize parasitism is not the only way. I love it! 

alas I don’t recall the iskoort returning in the story (but also my memory is terrible so who knows?) but still that would be cool

basically I feel like this is the book where Jake Truly comes into his own as a leader, in every sense. he outmaneuvers Crayak, and even the ellimist, who’s yanking them around in his own way

the scene where jake shoves the howler off the cliff and jumps off and morphs and acquires the howler...that was fantastic and tense. 

also the murder is definitely becoming more overt. I mean, it has been for a while, but it isn’t really pointed out as much anymore. oof

more on the chee - as Jake points out in this book, and other characters point out in other books - the chee could have saved the pemalites, but instead just stood by while their creators were slaughtered. on the other hand, jake says, what do the chee do AFTER they’ve killed the howlers - where to point them next? when is the end of their violence? 

buuuuut also standing by while atrocities occur is pretty damning, as is frequently mentioned in this series - from the very beginning, when marco initially doesn’t want to get involved in the war at all, and the other animorphs basically tell him that turning his back on the war and acting like he doesn’t even know it’s happening would be immoral and cowardly (which imo this reaction helps to push marco in the direction he ends up going, but I digress) - this topic comes up again in 19 when cassie quits the team and rachel is upset bc she sees it as cassie elevating her own feelings above the greater good (as in, as long as cassie feels good about how she acts, it doesn’t matter how much preventable evil the yeerks are committing while she turns away). etc etc. but that’s essentially what’s happening w/the chee - even tho they help w/intel, the lack of any sort of Action on their part means that they’re essentially allowing awful things to happen when they could prevent them. this is rambly but basically...animorphs deals so much in grey areas, and the chee are noticeably black and white in their actions, despite falling, in a meta sense, in an extremely grey area. its such good, thought provoking writing!

anywayssss I keep talking about the chee lmao what else was there. oh YEAH jake and cassie kissed for the first time awww that was super cute 

and ofc immediately marco teases them as asks jake if he’s gonna kiss him next, and all I can say is...marco is a bicon 

also I love the background worldbuilding w/the iskoort, how they have all these groups and guilds and stuff - its not dwelled on much, which actually works really well to give the world/species a sense of lived-in realness 

okay oh man and the reveal at the end that the howlers were just like...children who thought the whole thing was a game...AUGHH man that’s sooo fucked 

like, when jake morphs the howler and has rachel ready to knock him down in grizzly morph if he gets out of control due to the howler’s murderous instincts, and he morphs to find that the howler is...playful, like a dolphin morph. SUCH a good fucked up sense of dawning horror there 

and the fact that as far as I can tell the chee KNEW this, but wanted revenge anyways, so they let the animorphs assume that the howlers were Evil On Purpose

also I love smaller moments, like jake seeing that ax is ashamed for briefly running away during one battle w/the howlers, and then entrusts him w/an important task bc he knows that ax will see that as redemption - and when everyone thought jake was dead and were so happy when he wasn't (they all love each other so much im gonna cry about these child soldiers augh)

basically that book was so good

man one thing I absolutely love is that the longer the series goes on the more obvious it is that andalites, despite inventing morphing technology, barely use it themselves 

like, most of the andalite characters we see barely morph. its kind of a last resort to them, as they’re already plenty dangerous in their regular forms 

meanwhile for the animorphs, that’s all they have to fight with. that’s their only weapons against the yeerks, and its so fun to see them use the power in so many varied ways, and so creatively, while the andalites have barely scratched the surface of their own technology

its also interesting to contrast against the yeerks who start out w/absolutely no technology, and the andalites share some but not all of their technology w/them...its too bad that morphing technology was just starting out cause that would’ve been interesting

like imo a lot of the conflict w/the yeerks could’ve been avoided if they could just nothlit into better forms - of course, there’d still be plenty of yeerks who want to go start wars or w/e, just like pretty much any species in the series, but a lot of yeerks would probably be like ‘yeah I'm good’ and just chill out as nothlits

also people online love to talk about how humans are alienfuckers and would definitely have sex w/sentient aliens and whatnot, and while I'm not saying that's untrue, its just funny bc in animorphs the truest alienfuckers are definitely the andalites

as of the hork-bajir chronicles, we now have a second instance of an andalite morphing another species to be in an inter-species alien romance (and eventually have kids) 

speaking of, I don’t think I’ve talked abt the hork bajir chronicles yet??? even tho I read it a while ago lmao 

HBC was great...I honestly haven’t really run into an animorphs book I’ve actually disliked at this point, I’m sure it’ll come w/all the ghostwriting and whatnot, but I’ve liked at least some aspects of every book

anyways HBC was great, and it’s funny bc I remember that I read this book as a kid, and yet rereading it now I didn’t remember a single bit of it lmaooo

I really liked the framing device of the free hork bajir telling this story to tobias. I also liked how we know from the beginning that this story wont have a happy ending - we know all the hork bajir end up enslaved by the yeerks, but it’s still somehow hopeful at the end? I think this is largely due to the framing device tbh. 

also I love toby, and I love that the First free hork bajir named their kid after tobias ;_; 

and oooh mannn I LOVED the different POVs from this book. all the characters were so interesting! aldrea was fascinating - I really like the increasingly negative view of the andalites that the readers are getting, all while maintaining the sense that they aren’t like, actively evil, just that they have their issues - like aldrea’s arrogance, and the general andalite arrogance which lead to the loss of the hork bajir. also, who knew andalites had their own brand of sexism? Ls

I did like getting a female andalite tho, that was cool. and dak was really cool, he was such a good, compassionate character who was able to maintain his morals in an interesting way throughout the story

and VISSER THREE...or should I say esplin 9466, because he’s not visser 3 yet...getting his ‘origin story’ was excellent - I really like how we’re learning about visser 3 backwards - we start off the series w/him as the main villain, and he’s campy and menacing, and then we see him in the andalite chronicles as a power-hungry sub-visser trying to climb the ranks and eventually getting alloran as a host, and then back even further here, w/the start of his focus on the andalites and the beginning of his ambition. its been very cool and interesting to see

plus, the beginning of the yeerks as we know them! seerow! alloran! it’s a party and nobody is having a good time, except for some of the yeerks. 

I like how it’s pretty obvious that the andalites are well-meaning with their interactions w/the yeerks, but go about it the wrong way - they give them enough technology that the yeerks realize there’s a whole world out there to experience, and then they blockade the yeerks on their planet and tell them they can’t leave. nnnnot the best approach imo

again, as I said above, I’m interested in how things could’ve gone if the andalites had given the yeerks morphing technology early on - could a lot of the conflict have been avoided, or would it have been worse? the yeerks seem pretty evil in this book, immediately jumping to enslave anyone they can. otoh we hear from esplin that not all yeerks like having host bodies, and find it overwhelming, preferring to swim around in the yeerk pool as a slug - I assume as host bodies became more available this type of thinking was probably stamped out in yeerk society or w/e, but there are a lot of interesting what-ifs in the situation 

I loved the scene where esplin first experiences having a host, and immediately knows he can’t go back. there are a bunch of great sensory descriptions, and it’s a nice scene to pinpoint as a foundational moment for the visser three in the current story, who spent a lot of time and energy getting what he sees as the best possible host body, an andalite

I find it interesting how much visser three clearly respects the andalites, even while constantly deriding them. and you can see the origins of that here as he immediately focuses in on the andalites, working to become an expert on them in order to make himself useful enough to move thru the ranks

another thing I like is how esplin seems a lot more crafty and ambitious than the visser three from modern times - I would guess that reaching his goal (andalite host body) and being given all that power was detrimental, playing on his weaknesses instead of his strengths. basically, I don’t think it’s ooc or anything, I can see how HBC-esplin became animorphs-esplin, especially w/TAC in between

as for seerow...poor dude. you really do have to feel for him, because you get the sense he really did just want to be kind to the yeerks, but it was borne from a place of pity, and he (and the other andalites) consistently held too much power over the yeerks for the species relations to ever be truly equal and functional 

AUGH I have so many thoughts about alien space politics. omg. I need to talk about the actual story lmao

so yeah I also feel for aldrea, she had a rough time, watching her entire family die and being thrown into a hopeless war

and then the andalite council or w/e not listening to her bc she's a girl AND seerow’s daughter...oof

also, I really really liked the running theme of the andalites - specifically aldrea - looking down on the hork bajir as ‘simple’ and constantly underestimating them, especially dak

and I like how this is portrayed as a bad attitude for aldrea to have, and she still remains and interesting and sympathetic character even while having obvious flaws. it’s about being 3-dimensional baby!

and oh man I love that dak realizes that aldrea looks down on him, and his entire species, but he can see that that’s how the andalites are, and it all connects back to the beginning of the story w/the yeerks, bc the andalites looked down on the yeerks and treated them with pity and kept them pinned under their proverbial thumb ‘for their own good’ and look how that turned out 

but dak is wise and kind enough to not hate aldrea for this, even acknowledging when she’s using him, but not pushing her away because he recognizes good in her too - and she ends up changing, partially because of his faith in her

and I feel like it can all be compared to that scenario of like - a hypothetical creature that lives in a 2D world suddenly being thrust into a 3D world, and comprehending what its seeing, and understanding that there’s so much more out there outside of the flat lines of its world - and then its dropped back into 2D-land with the knowledge of all the stuff its missing out on, and no way to get back to it or explain it to anybody else

I loooove that ‘trope’ or w/e you wanna call it, and it’s done beautifully here w/the yeerks - whos the say they wouldn't have been fine in their pool swimming around; as esplin said, a lot of the yeerks were terrified of having a host, it was only from the andalites’ perspective that their lives were sad and pitiful, and the andalites showed them what the world could be like, and then said ‘no, you can’t travel the stars like we do, you have to stay here on your planet and do what we say.’

and then again, w/the hork bajir - dak talks about how, even though he drinks up the knowledge that aldrea gives him, in the end it might have been better to just have lived peacefully, not knowing what was in the sky or the Deep - as aldrea says: “It was too late for Dak: he knew that the stars were not flowers.” 

plus the hork bajir having to go from a completely peaceful species who don’t even understand the concept of violence, to a bunch of soldiers fighting a war...oof 

basically everyone in this story uses the hork bajir. the yeerks use them as hosts, the andalites use their planet as a convenient place to dump seerow and then take their sweet time coming to help, and the arn created them as means to stabilize the planet, but block them off from their society and refuse to help when the yeerks come

like, the arn modifying themselves to be un-infestable by the yeerks and then being enslaved for physical labor instead? oof guys. if they had teamed up w/the hork bajir resistance things might have gone better, but probably not 

more on aldrea - throughout the story I was always thinking ‘how am I supposed to see her? as a good person, or as a bad person?’ 

as a POV character, especially a ‘good guy’ andalite, you just start off automatically thinking of her as a good person, but as the story goes on, she starts getting lost in revenge and begins using dak and the hork bajir, and you’re left wondering if this is a story about her slide into darkness, and then towards the end of the story her character development culminates in her making the decision to stay w/the hork bajir, and the be with dak, and that’s about when I went ‘ohhh right this is animorphs so every character is pretty much gonna be grey’

I feel like that moral grey-ness was on full display w/aldrea, and I really enjoyed that. I love so much when characters who are good do bad things, for good or bad reasons, especially in media like animorphs that’s aimed at kids. it’s so compelling. 

oof, and the ending when aldrea convinces dak to mobilize the hork bajir and teach them violence...and dak asks her if she’s ever killed another andalite, and she’s horrified, and says of course she hasn’t, and he says that that’s what she’s asking him, and all the hork bajir, to do - to kill their own people, even if they are being controlled by the yeerks. biiiig oof. I love that dak can keep up w/aldrea and her andalite supremacy attitude - it seems that the non-andalite characters who get along best w/the andalites are the ones who wont take their bs 

what else happened....oh my god how could I forget about alloran, and his quantum virus. oooof. I like how we find out about alloran in parallel to visser three, in the same backwards way - in animorphs he’s the tragic host of visser three, in TAC he’s the disgraced but still semi-respected war-prince who becomes the first ever andalite controller, and here he’s the guy who decides to commit some war crimes because, hey, we haven’t tried that yet 

but yeah that was fucked up, I love it. I’ve said it before I think but I like that alloran isn’t some perfect martyr tragically taken by the yeerks - it’s a lot more compelling that he’s a very flawed person who was taken as a controller partially due to his own bloodthirstiness. 

but yeah, the part where aldrea morphs alloran and ‘sneaks’ into that room was great. aldrea’s dedication to disposing of the virus is a great indicator of her character development - it really feels like the straw that broke the camels back w/re: to the andalites not being what she thought they were, w/their tardiness coming to help the hork bajir planet and the way her father was treated being the precursors to this realization. it all culminates nicely in aldrea saying ‘fuck this actually’ and nothlit-ing into a hork bajir.

and it’s really tragic but realistic that even though aldrea and dak end up seeing eye to eye at the end and getting together, the virus ends up being released anyways (and fails in its objective to stop the yeerks from using the hork bajir - the whole thing was p much a lose-lose situation oof), and aldrea and dak still die fighting a hopeless war 

but then we have the free hork bajir on earth, including toby, who, like tobias, has andalite ancestry, but no DNA to show for it - I like that they have that connection as well as tobias being her namesake

so yeah I enjoyed that one and its many-layered themes

WOW this got long uuuuuhhh ok I think i’ll leave this one off here. at the time I’m actually finishing the writing and editing, I’m on book 35 lol so I have some backlogging to do. never fear, I have a lot to say....

[female-dating-strategy]

Why is the concept of a man paying for a date so triggering and nightmarish to some men?

I keep hearing is brought up completely randomly as some sensationalist horror meme to manipulate people, alongside "entitlement is evil".

Oh and…lemme clarify. I’m apathetic about this personally or used to be (no, didn't date around--was focusing on myself until I found an exception). Ended up meeting a sweet, cute man my age that pays autonomously anyway despite me never asking and he’s my fiancé now anyway. Buuuuut…I woulda lived without it. It’s just…really nice and he doesn’t want me to worry. So now it feels normal and for the first time in my life someday I might actually want to have a child--granted in 10 years the marriage still goes strong. I didn't at all expect this (this was my fun best friend, we just talked for many months and hundreds of hours before he confessed), yet this has surprisingly made me feel genuinely safe and not pressured that I always would have to work and take care of the house and child. The option now exists.

Only a few years ago it was normal in society for men to pay for dates. Yet I’ve seen dudes out there screeching about how psychopathic and love-destroying it is (LOL).

Let’s see why a man paying for a date is fairer than it seems…

Women objectively face more of the worst risks of dating more often in the short and long term (pregnancy is life-annihilating); and men are gifted with having to worry mostly just about money. You’re meeting a stranger; you don’t know what’ll happen. Most men probably have “fuck or duck” on their minds. Hell, a man who pays then expects sex on the first few weeks is a gigantic red flag—which is great for us to see so we can dump him

Apparently women have a “time frame” to get this shit done and so their youth and time is valuable and precious

Women usually spend 100-1000$s on their looks a year and a ton of emotional, mental, and physical labor maintaining them in multiple ways, while men mostly spend peanuts and sometimes work out

Dolling up also takes a ton of time; time is money

(Crudely) shows initiative and investment on the part of the man which is actually a lot more important for women to look for. I’d say the man who pays more on average cares more (not always); research usually shows the same

Oh. And my favoritest:

Hhem. So. Lemme get this right. You ask out a girl on a date, exhibiting the typical blatant gender traditions, want to show her a good time and impress her probably waste her time, spend gas money…and…you just want to pay half?

I guess that’s fine. Plenty of decent dudes buy into it, sure, but I honestly don’t think it’s that crazy to prefer the tradition frame, weighing what women have to do and sacrifice.

I think more intuition can be used to judge payers versus 50/50ers (both can be bad or good), though I feel like if you want men to pay and feel reluctant, then…you might as well just be forthright instead. It does the men who aren’t into that a favor too. Better be honest up front then get pissed at them later for being cheap - which is what often happens - but for whatever reason this seems to inspire extreme outrage in men instead. TOTALLY makes logical sense.

There seems to be this really…bent push for extreme centrism and equality between the genders in “all” ways. A willful refusal to understand that in some ways things are just unfair, and…I’ll be honest…just not worth it to a lot of women if they have to break even on everything (because in nature things aren't equal, there's far different risks). I don’t actually think the world can even compute egalitarianism yet in a wholesome, good way. And even then it won’t always be perfect, because Biology is unfair as hell, and so are gender relations.

Why is this so complicated to understand? I'm not saying men are obligated to pay for everything or should be held 100% accountable for the severe depravity and flippantness of many of their peers, but some things are just quite easy to do. Where's the is real issue?

Sorce

[bigassheart]

OK, I just watched The Old Guard on Netflix and now I can’t get the idea out of my head for an Umbrella Academy/Old Guard crossover. 

Still trying to brainstorm how that would fit together. Ideas under the cut. I would love some feedback. 

OK, so first the basics. 

A lot of the general framework in The Old Guard has obvious characters that fit from TUA. 

Current 4 person team: Luther, Allison, Diego, Klaus

Love interests in that group: Allison and Luther 

Possible betrayer: Klaus (I love him, but he did eventually give up Five to Hazel and ChaCha in exchange for drugs)

New addition just discovering their powers: Vanya

Former team member that is now dead: Ben

Former team member that is now missing: Five

Rich dude that wants to use the team for his own ends: Reginald

Buuuuut.... I’m not sure how closely I want to follow that outline. 

1. Allison and Luther

Unlike a lot of folks, the Allison/Luther relationship doesn’t really bother me. I think they have some cute moments and some good chemistry. BUT, that being said, they’re not a relationship I’m terribly invested in and I don’t really know how to write them, which is going to make writing a century long true love romance for the ages story like Nicky and Joe’s a little difficult. 

I’m thinking it may stay in the will they/won’t they realms of maybe there’s some history there, but also maybe there have been other relationships along the way, but there’s still that romantic tension between them. 

2. The betrayer

Klaus as a 29 year old addict would absolutely betray his family for drugs, BUT I feel like several hundred year old Klaus who has probably been through a lot worse would absolutely NOT betray his family for drugs. I think the reason needs to be more substantial. Also, I want to stick with the Old Guard framework of the betrayal being a good intentions bad actions kind of situation, which leads me to...

Allison would be the most sympathetic betrayer. She has a kid. Maybe Claire isn’t the only kid in this fic. Maybe she too had to watch her family die and wants to find a way to share their immortality. 

Luther is the other option I can think of, mostly because he is 100% full of good intentions and 100% terrible at choosing good actions to go with those good intentions. (OK, maybe only 90%. He does have a few good moments)

I don’t know though. Thoughts? 

3. I don’t know about killing off Ben. 

If they have their TUA powers in addition to the immortality in this fic, Ben still gets to be a part of things if he’s dead, but it also undermines the message that all things do eventually come to an end. 

Also, if Ben is alive, maybe Klaus and Ben is the central caring relationship in the group (Maybe not romantic, but it’s a nice dynamic that I don’t want to give up)

But maybe if he’s dead and Klaus can’t see him, that’s the motivation for Klaus to be the betrayer after all? 

But I also really want him to be in this fic.

I don’t know. Lots of mixed feelings on this one. 

Last two decisions I’m trying to make right now are ages and (as previously mentioned) whether to include the TUA powers. 

Ages:

It makes the most sense to put the ages in order of their numbers (Luther being the oldest and Vanya being the youngest), especially with there being a character who literally only goes by their number. But there are some other ideas and complications to consider. 

1. Five and Luther

In the comics, I believe Five and Luther turn out to be twins. That would be an interesting approach to this fic. What if Luther wasn’t alone at first, but Five was with him: twins blessed/cursed with immortality? Gives them a strong bond and makes giving up on finding Five an even bigger emotional kick. 

2. Ben (if he dies)

Not sure about the comics, but in the movie, there’s an implication that the members of The Old Guard just stop healing because they’re old. If their ages match their numbers, then Ben would be pretty young to die and not come back. 

BUT they do say they don’t know why they stop healing AND Ben being younger would put more weight to the risk they’re all taking. 

And of course, if Ben doesn’t die, that means someone else needs to die for them to know that’s a possibility. And if they’re all numbered, that would mean you would need to have someone else missing in order for the numbering to make sense. (why count only themselves and not their fallen brother/sister?)

For the Powers, is it too much to have those on top of immortality? Also the issue brought up before with Ben being dead but not dead. 

I don’t know. Thoughts? 

[konako]

I WANT SUM SHEPARD AND THE WOLF- I STAN THAT 3 LITTLE PIGS WHY DIDNT YOU WRITE FOR OUAT DA HECK

BECAUSE IT WOULD BECOME A RUBY CENTRIC SHOW AND I WOULD TURN IT INTO A SHAMELESS HAREM

The Shepard and The Wolf – should have been  a blossoming bromance born of brooding bloated b… jealousy.

This is a blanket story for the dynamic of David and Ruby. It starts when they first meet, and ends with their ends, much like Snow and Regina’s grand narrative.

But the core of it (and the moral of the story) takes place in FTL, before the Dark Curse.

Snow White meets Red first, and it’s Red who introduces her to this wild world of survival, living in the forest, fighting with her fists, fending for herself. Snow White before Red was a hopeless runaway princess, hiding in strangers cabins and stealing eggs – nothing like the Snow White that met Charming, years later.

Point is, Snow White and Red share a history together. We know Red owes her life to Snow; she stood by Red through the worst of her wolf, through the loss of Peter, Anita, her identity, everything. But – Snow wouldn’t have survived without Red’s teachings, Red’s guidance, Red’s wild spirit. Snow White, too, owes her life to Red.

And, in this story, Charming has a hard time understanding that at first.

Charming meets an independent, strong, fierce Snow White. Fearless and so smart… Charming falls in love. Deeply. And so does Snow. It’s True Love, after all. Buuuuut, things start to get complicated.

Aside from Charming’s whole thing of pretending to be his twin brother, a Prince, and having to marry King Midas’ daughter, we have the bigger problem: Regina is after Snow White. And after all of the issues are solves in Charming’s end, the great obstacle, and the reason they need all of their forces, is the Evil Queen and the War that is brewing.

Charming knows Snow White has some strange friends. Fairies, dwarves, huntsmen… she’s had a long and tough journey before she met Charming, and he understands she’s made some curious friendships, but – when a werewolf comes through their door, Charming is genuinely afraid.

He’s learned how to fight – he had to be a convincing Prince, and his previous life as a Shepard taught him one thing or two. Most importantly, he learned what to be cautious of. The sheep knew, and so did he. A Wolf is not good company.

And wan’t that the kind that turned during a full moon? Large teeth, paws eight inches across, big long claws…? Those were dangerous, right?

I mean, fairies and dwarves are one thing, but…. werewolves? There has never been a sign of a friendly werewolf! There were always human-hating monsters. Sure, fairies are light and good and grant wishes, that’s cute. Dwarves can be rude and inappropriate, but nothing too serious. But a werewolf? Is Snow serious? Has her hopefulness gone too far? Isn’t she being too trusting, too kind, too… blind?

It’s immediately clear: Charming doesn’t trust Red.

Snow tries her best to convince him that he has nothing to be scared of; that Red has the kindest heart she has ever seen; that Red saved her life; that there isn’t an evil bone in Red’s body – but Charming is smarter than that. Red is a wolf in woman’s clothing.

And it’s not like she’s not a good person. She tries to befriend him. There’s a stiffness to her, though. She stares at him for too long, when he’s with Snow. Her smiles seem weak and falter when he puts his arms around Snow’s shoulder. Her eyes lose some of their color, when he kisses Snow. And he can swear he once heard her growl low in her throat in her sleep.

Wolves are territorial creatures, and Red was once Snow’s once friend. And Charming believes he was discovered the problem: Red is threathened by his presence. Somehow, she’s claimed Snow for herself (like a werewolf does), and will not allow Charming near. But he is Snow White’s true love and he isn’t going anywhere – so she is pissed. And he knows an angry werewolf cannot be trusted. So he doesn’t. Not even a little. Not even once.

Not when they’re running from King George’s men. Not when they’re fighting the Dark Knights of the Queen. Not when they’re huddling together for warmth in a cold night – Snow in the middle as a buffer. Always in the middle, as a buffer.

Charming always keeps an eye on her. He never lets his guard down. When they fight, he never turns his back to her, in case the Wolf bloods takes over in the heat of battle. He always keeps his hands on his sword longer than necessary, long after the fight is over and they are regrouping and Red comes join them, blood on her lips, eyes slightly golden and a little breathless.

It takes Snow putting her hand on his, to calm him down.

But he doesn’t trust Red. And he is vocal about it. To Snow, at least. He cries danger.

“Snow, be careful. Snow, don’t get too close. Snow, please, she’s dangerous. Snow, no. Snow, come back. Snow”

Snow doesn’t listen, but he keeps on crying.

Until the day Snow is not there, to act as a buffer.

She’s kidnapped. A vicious bounty hunter that has been tracking them for months – that slipped through the cracks of mistrust and inner conflicts – he gets to them and takes Snow, in the middle of the night. A night when Red is off running and Charming was supposed to keep a loo -out, but Snow had insisted that he joined her in bed – that Red would howl if there was any danger.

But she doesn’t. And Charming doesn’t see it coming. The man takes Snow in the middle of the night, as she leaves bed to use the bathroom. He just takes her, and Charming wakes up to her screaming.

He runs to them, fast enough to see them taking off on a horse, disappearing into the dark forest. He sees the details on the man’s bag, and he knows who the stranger is (insert coincidental backstory here idk). But he is not fast enough to catch them, and falls to his knees, crying.

Red appears behind him, after his tears have dried and his already up, gathering his weapons.

“Where were you?! Why didn’t you sound off the alarm? He took her!”

Red fights to have a word in.

“You were the one with her! Why didn’t you do anything?!”

“We trusted you would protect us-”

“You never trusted me!”

“And now I know why!”

Red can’t keep fighting like this. She once was used to arguing – with Granny and Peter, but it was always about pointless things, never… never her very existence, her nature, her… worthlessness. She can’t argue, because she agrees with him.

But Charming doesn’t mind that he’s hurt Red. He’s blinded with rage, and he’s putting on his armor.

“Where are you going?” Red asks.

“Where do you think? After them!”

Red nods. “If I turn, I can catch them–”

“No! I will find them! Snow’s my responsibility, not yours”

“Excuse me?”

“I mean–! Oh, you know what I mean. I have to find her.”

Red bites her lips. “I’m faster than you. I’m faster than a horse. I can find them. I’ll track Snow’s scent.” She starts getting ready, too. Her hands are on her cloak, again “It’s not far. I can still smell her. If I go now–”

Charming grabs her by her forearm, and it startles her. Green eyes are wide, staring at him. “No. I’ll go.”

“This is not the time for a competition” Red easily pulls her arm out of his grip. Her temper is getting worse. It’s a full moon, and Charming has a way of getting under her skin. “I’m going. You can stay here, and resent me, all you want”

Red turns to leave again, but Charming runs in front of her and gets in her way. He has his sword drawn, and it takes a moment for Red to register the offense fully. Honestly, she didn’t expect things to get this far.

“Red. I’m not asking you.” His voice is a warning.

“What do you think I’ll do, Charming?” She mocks the nickname. “Snow White is my friend. I will get her back, that’s it” She finishes, but makes no attempt to move.

Charming is silent, but his eyes say everything. “Why didn’t you warm us?”

Red suppresses a snarl at the implication. “I didn’t hear him coming. I was busy”

Charming presses his finger harder around the hilt of the sword. “Doing what?”

Red breathes. “What do you think?” It’s a challenge. One Charming doesn’t accept. “What do you expect of me?”

“I expected a look-out”

“That’s a lie. You never trusted me.” Red steps closer, until the tip of the sword touches her chest. It’s not silver, so it’s not a problem. “And now, they are getting away, because you can’t trust me to bring her back”

Charming doesn’t have a response, but it doesn’t stop him from trying. “I don’t trust you to keep her safe. Not like this” He runs his eyes over her entire body, and Red realizes what he means – her temper and the full moon above their heads. “You were running to stay away from us, right? To keep us safe from the Wolf? So stay away. Please”

His pleading is hollow, and Red is pissed. She breathes in. “I was running to clear my head. I’m not a danger. I’ve got my wolf under control”

Charming is breathing heavily now. It’s his tell, that he’s scared. “It doesn’t seem like that to me”

“You are the one pointing the sword at me”

Charming seems self-conscious, but it’s not enough to get his guard down. “I’m going after Snow–”

“I’m the best at this! I can run faster, I can track her scent, I can get her back safely to your arms. She’ll still love you more, don’t worry–”

Red stops herself, but it’s too late. She’s already said it. Fuck. She bites at her lips. Fucking full moon.

“I’m not…” She tries again. “I’m not going to run away with her, Charming,” She sounds utterly tired, now. “I’ll bring her back to you.”

Charming is not backing down. “I shouldn’t need you”

“But you do,” Red tries not to growl. “You’ve waited too long, now I’m our best chance at getting her back, okay?”

“You should have sounded the alarm–”

“I didn’t hear anything–!”

“She shouldn’t have been taken–!”

“I was running, I thought you were taking care of her–!”

“I should have been!”

It echoes.

Now Charming messed up. Nice. “… I should have been. From the start. I shouldn’t… need you.”

Red frowns. She doesn’t know what to say. “You don’t need me. Snow does.” A moment. “Or… Snow did. Up until…” She motions her hand to Charming, but says nothing. “I helped her when she needed me, and she helped me back. We’re friends. We’re at War. Help is needed. That’s all it is…”

Charming watches her for a moment. She’s got a point. But, still, there’s… something about her. Confusing energy and rough breathing. A full moon. 

He put his sword back, yet somehow it does little to defuse the tension.

“It’s a full moon,” he says, simply, as if it’s enough of an argument.

“Good. It means I’ll be at my fastest” Red’s answer is nervous.

“It means a close confrontation is dangerous. One thing is a vast army in an open field. Another is a one-to-one fight in a dense forest – with Snow held hostage”

It takes a second for the insult to reach Red. “You’re kidding.”

Charming switches to his commanding voice, and Red’s skin itches.

“Let me find Snow. Keep clearing your head. Stay”

Ooooh, that word does something to Red.

Stay.

Like a dog. Like the countless comments she pretends not to hear from afar. Like the jokes Grumpy tells and Charming sometimes smiles at. Like the tail between our legs.

It does it, for Red. She just pushes forward, past him, into the forest. He yells at her back to stay. But she’s done listening to him. He runs after her and grabs at her cloak to hold her back. There’s a resistance at first, but then the knot is undone, and Charming falls back.

Shit gets real. The cloak is ripped off of Red’s shoulders, and just like that, the Wolf is out.

Charming falls on his ass, and the Wolf stops in its track. Oh, shit, shit.

Charming stumbles up to his feet again, as the Wolf turns to him, the dark fur almost indistinguishable from the night around.

“Red…” He whispers, hand held in front of his body.

The Wolf steps towards him, then stops. They stare at each other. Golden eyes fall down to the blade, then up at Charming again. It’s a question. Will you use it?

Charming gulps. “Please. I have to get her back.”

A huge paw stumps on the ground, and Charming almost jumps back. Almost.

“Please…”

The Wolf steps even closer, and Charming fights to stand his ground. Slowly, the Wolf turn back, towards the depths of the forest, and looks over its shoulder, to Charming.

It’s an invitation.

The Wolf lowers its head, then its body. Charming finally understands the command. Come on.

It takes a lot for him to move. His mind races, as he considers the danger, the leap of faith. The man getting rapidly getting away with Snow, and the only chance Charming’s got to reach them and save her.

It truly takes a lot, but, slowly, his hand lets go of the sword. 

On shaky feet, he gets closer, and with even shakier hands, he grabs onto the thick mane around the Wolf’s neck, swinging his leg over the beast’s back, and sitting on top of it.

He can feel the vibrations of a silent growl under his body, but before his fear can permanently set it, the Wolf is already taking off at full speed, into the forest.

Charming’s never been so fast in his life. The tree pass him in a blur, and he has no idea where they are going. The strong strides barely touch the ground, but shake his entire body with a force he’s sure will bruise him.

It’s strangely empowering. His fears are quickly dulled in comparison to this. This speed and strength. He’s never felt so strong before. Never so sure of his chances. This is the most powerful he has ever been. 

It doesn’t take a minute for them to catch up to the man. Never was a horse so slow and a chase so short.

The Wolf jumps over them, and lands in front of their path, blocking their way. Charming struggles to keep his balance on top of the Wolf, as he takes his sword out once again.

“Red! Charming!” Snow cries for them, a huge smile on her wet cheeks. “What…?”

The horse is startled by the Wolf, and the man can’t keep it still. They fall off of it, and Snow falls to the side. Charming gets off the Wolf and runs to her, helping her up.

Meanwhile, the man is getting up, rubbing at his head. The Wolf growls a loud, terrifying sound and the horse runs away, leaving the hunter alone, without his weapons.

Charming hugs Snow close to his body, and they join the Wolf’s side, facing the man. Bared teeth and a sharp sword, pointed at him. He’s caught, he can’t outrun a wolf or fight a Prince. He surrenders, getting on his knees and raising his hands above his head.

The heroic moment is savored.

Charming, the Wolf and Snow, standing side by side, a good team. The silence of victory is sweet and all, but Snow has to comment. She looks over at them, one on each side of her.

“Took you two long enough”

And it has more than one meaning.

And so they stand there. Snow rubs behind the Wolf’s ears and pull its head close against her body, hugging the fluffy mane. With her other hand, she hold Charming’s arm, resting her head on his shoulder.

The Wolf grunts and huffs at the proximity, and Charming is still stiff and sweaty, but it’s a start… 

It’s a start.

[earlgraytay]

Review: Disney Attractionistas

So I realize it’s a bit of a fools’ errand to review a doll line that’s been out since 2015, but I just got my hands on four of the Disney Attractionistas and I wanted to give my 2 cents on ‘em. They’re still selling them at the parks, AFAIK, soooo...

nota bene: I got these dolls used. Some of my gripes amount to “these dolls are used and were clearly played with at some point. also this review is for GROWNUPS not CHILDRENS these dolls cost LOTS OF REAL MONEY YES. </topical joke> 

So here are the four Attractionistas I got. Each Attractionista, in case you don’t know the doll line’s gimmick, is a gijinka for a Disney attraction. From left to right, we’ve got Gracie/the Haunted Mansion, Nellie/the Jungle Cruise, Pearl/Pirates of the Caribbean, and Celeste/Space Mountain. 

Each doll comes with sundry accessories, including a Cute Animal Friend and a hat. Nellie is missing most of her accessories, including her hat, her messenger bag, her Cute Animal Friend, and her shoes- these are random witch boots that I thought belonged to Gracie at first. 

The obligatory size comparison, with Queen Amidala standing in as our default Barbie. The Attractionista looks much taller than the regular Barbie, but she really isn’t- most of the size difference is the neck and the giant noggin.  

Amidala has a TNT waist for some ungodly reason (and I feel old now!), so I switched to Nolee, my OOAK My Scene, for the next few comparison pics... 

Attractionistas can wear Barbie clothing just fine. (to be one of my dolls and be loved, you MUST submit to the mortifying ordeal of wearing Godawful Vintage Barbie Cutoff Jorts.) 

Barbies can more or less wear Attractionista clothing- the tops and the boots fit okay-

Buuuuut the pants don’t fit so good. I think if I struggled a lil I could get them to close over the butt, but Barbies seem to have slightly wider waists than Attractionistas. 

Going back to the dolls themselves: 

This is what Nellie looks like with her outfit “taken apart”. That bra is not standard, it was clearly painted on by her previous owner. Three of my four dolls have this. 😒The only one who was spared was, for some reason, Pearl. At least it makes this review less likely to get flagged...

These gals have 5 points of proper articulation- depressingly small, I know. Their heads are hard vinyl without much squish to it- kinda like Bratzillas. Their bodies are hard plastic, and so are their arms- their legs are that annoying rubbery Vintage Barbie Plastic, and they have click knees. I hate hate HATE click knees. 

The clothes are nicely detailed, and while the tops are only one piece (even the more complicated ones like Pearl’s corset/blouse), everything fits well and is mostly sturdy enough for play. The one exception to this? Sleeves. 

See, Attractionistas have big weird hands...

They look more like Monster High hands than Barbie ones, and are spread out much wider. Unfortunately, unlike Monster High, their hands aren’t detachable. And with no articulation and fairly narrow sleeves... getting their hands through is a bit of a chore. 

Their legs are also pretty rubbery. Some dolls with click legs still manage to have the ability to hold a pose- these ones don’t. 

Moving on to the other dolls...

You can probably guess that Gracie is my fave, for the obvious reasons- she’s a Victorian Goff, she has a top hat, she represents the Spoooooky Haunted House...

But also: BUSTLE DRESS. I want to reverse-engineer this thing. 

She also comes with a cute animal friend who I think might be my toysona... 

(seriously it’s a lil purple bat in a top hat, how can you not love this friend?) 

In fact, now’s a good time to talk about the animal buddies: 

I got three of the four - like I said, Nellie’s tiger was missing. They’re super cute and loaded with Disney Charm (TM). I especially like Gracie’s bat and Celeste’s dog- they’ve stolen my heart. 

Speaking of Celeste.... She came to me decapitated. Maybe she was cosplaying in honour of Space Mountain: Ghost Galaxy’s demise. :( 

It looks like her neck peg broke and her previous owner couldn’t fix it. If I try to recapitate the girls (TM) onto new bodies then Celeste will be the first attempt. 

She’s very cute, though. I get kind of a Miku vibe from her. SPACE MOUNTAIN SAID TRANS RIGHTS!

As for Pearl, the Pirates of the Caribbean doll:

I’ve said most of what I wanted to say about the line as a whole, so I don’t have that much to say about Pearl other than- yeah, I like her. Her Pirate Outfit is cute and I’m a sucker for dolls with giant manes of curls. Her hat doesn’t want to stay on, and her parrot can’t really sit on her shoulder- gotta work on that.

And here’s The Gang together on my shelf!

final verdict:

These dolls have some of the cutest designs and some of the worst construction I’ve ever seen from a legit doll. I can’t tell who the target audience is- these are too cheaply made to really appeal to collectors, but too delicate and with too many fiddly pieces to appeal to children. 

I’d rate these 6.5-7/10- they’re good dolls if you can get them for cheap like I did, but they’re not worth paying full price. (Especially not if “full price” requires a trip to the Disney parks, good lord!) 

And I fully intend to customize them- maybe even do a head shrink, if the acetone can handle it. >_> 

[standfortheangels]

What song makes you feel better?what’s your favorite candle scent?what flower would you like to be given?say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical).what calms you down?what’s your ideal date?how are you?what’s your comfort food?do you still love stuffed animals?what’s something you do to de-stress?hugs or hand-holding?morning, afternoon or night?what reminds you of home (doesn’t have to mean house… just things that remind you of the feeling of home)? [for mun

What song makes you feel better?

Ooo, this really depends on a lot of stuff. But weirdly, one song I go to a lot is Tubthumping by Chumbawumba. The names really tell you the vibe of the song >w>' it's silly- too silly to really take much seriously when you're listening to it, so it gradually cheers me up that way. But it's mostly the chorus bit that does it.

"I get knocked down, but I get up again! You are never gonna keep me down!"

Repeated over and over again with pride and happiness like a football chant.

It's the kind of mood that's just infectious, it's a crowd celebrating something, enjoying where and who they are. Pair that with the message in those lines, and, I dunno. It just really helps me~

_

what’s your favorite candle scent?

Oh this one is tough. My sense of smell isn't that great, usually I can smell a candle if I pick it up and sniff it, but when it's lit I don't tend to smell anything. There are very few candles I can light and smell in the room. So I tend to just pick candles based on colour tbh x'D

One thing I do love though is oil diffusers. A few drops of violet essential oil in the water, it comes out as steam, makes the place smell really nice.

_

What flower would you like to be given?

Aww, that's a cute one~ I'd love to be given any flower really, but if I have to pick... I'd say a sunflower. I think it'd be really funny to have someone pull this giant flower from behind their back and hand it over. X')

_

Say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical).

That's six! You can't fool me there >w> buuuuut fine.

Physical: I like my eye colour, I've got a general hourglass shape that I like, and I'm told I have very comfortable shoulders to lean on? Haha

Non-physical: I'm fairly intelligent, have a lot of patience when I need it, and I'm pretty weird, which is often funny for other people x')

_

What calms you down?

If I'm anxious, I have a few apps on my phone I can use that usually help. 'What's Up' is a great one, it has different tools you can use like grounding exercises and retargeting your thoughts and stuff. I also have games on there like Zen Koi and Alto's Odyssey, which I find relaxing. They're not too complicated to manage but they do grab my attention and have chill music on them.

If I'm calming down from being angry.... Dogs. I find if a dog comes up to me for a hug or something, I have to relax my muscles more, I have to be gentle with them and reassure them that it's all okay, it's like a conscious effort I make for their sake. So it puts a stop to my stressing out long enough for me to just start enjoying the fact that I have a dog. ^^

_

What’s your ideal date?

Ooo good question...

At the minute I can't really date at all with my health being this bad, so I'd probably go for a casual date where we play a low-pressure game together at home. I'm talking battleship, tetris, any Super Mario game that has a multiplayer feature, Snipperclips, Jenga, Wii tennis, anything. Just us chilling, having a little bit of playful rivalry maybe, a few healthy snacks~ that would be awesome. Some of these games we could even play from two separate places with a video call going, which would mean I wouldn't have to push myself to host or leave the house or even force myself to shower in advance; I could even stay in bed and just prop myself up with some pillows if I really needed to, take a laptop and we could go play something online maybe.

In the future though (because I really hope I'll improve eventually and get some of my life back) I'd still love the more casual fun dates, but not stuck inside. I'd love to go minigolfing and be terrible at it so we can both laugh at my awful shots, and I'll do some hopeless ironic trash talk and then lose by a mile~

I'd like to have a dog we can walk together. We could go to a quiet beach, which will probably be cold and muddy because it's England but we'll let the dog loose and smile at how much fun they're having, maybe play fetch or something, and then at the end be so so grateful that we thought to put old towels over the back seats of the car for our very very happy, very very very wet dog~

It'd be fun to go to a theme park together, or walk around a garden centre and plan out a garden we'll probably never get around to. Or a zoo! That'd be a great date place, a zoo, or SeaWorld, both are good.

I'd like to go for ice cream and sit on some random grassy bank to eat it together. To go to an art gallery with a camera and most of my photos would just be of my date seeing something she likes~ maybe I could even take a sketchbook too, and I could draw her in the styles and/or poses of whichever pieces she wants me to, while she poses in ridiculous funny ways and makes me laugh so much that I have to stop and then we move to the next room.

I've been too ill for too long and had so much emotional crap in my life, I wouldn't choose the rigid restaurant dates with all the same rules and the pressure, or strive to try and be the most romantic couple or whatever else.

For me, what I'd value most is being able to get out of the house and enjoy the world, and having a date with a light-hearted atmosphere.

_

How are you?

Tired as always! X') but for real, today has actually been okay. The last few days have been really rough pain-wise, but it hasn't been quite as bad today, so hopefully it'll ease off back to normal from here~ I've also been pretty productive in the last two days so I'm very happy with myself rn ^^

_

What’s your comfort food?

I have a couple! Chocolate, of course, is a classic one (chocolate peanuts in particular are something I reach for for comfort). And also, a hot pasta-based meal like lasagna or, heck just pasta in a nice sauce will do. Those meals are more like the comfort of being warm and homely, the kind of thing I might love if I were really tired and feeling sorry for myself, while chocolate peanuts are the "I'm upset so I'm eating my feelings" food. X')

_

Do you still love stuffed animals?

Of course! I don't have tons all over my bed purely because it's inconvenient, but I do keep two huge ones- a dog and a shark- on top of my wardrobe, and my littlest childhood friend is always in my room somewhere~

His name is Scruffy, and right now he's sleeping in my crystal box (open) on top of all the empty velvet bags. ^^ I used to take him everywhere, cuddle him every night as a slept.. he usually smelled pretty gross because I never wanted to give him up to be washed, haha X) thankfully he doesn't have that problem now~

_

What’s something you do to de-stress?

This might sound lame but, jigsaw puzzles. It has to be real ones, at the table with some music in my headphones. If I can't do that for whatever reason, I go to the bathroom and run cold water over my wrists for a minute or two, over the veiny side. It's kind of a mini cleansing ritual. I sometimes combine that with some deep breaths and imagine the water is literally washing the stress out of me, and it really does help. It's something I can do quickly and easily, I can just do it while or after washing my hands or something and that's that~

_

Hugs or hand-holding?

Hmm... prolonged, I'm not a huge fan of either? Eventually if you're holding hands it's like, when do you let go? What if your hand gets warm and clammy, or sweaty? Same with like a cuddle. Once you're in it, how do you say "hey I'm kind of uncomfortable now, this physical contact has gone on too long"? You don't want to be rude, and it might be hard to explain, so you've probably got to blame on being too warm even if you're not, and then that's a lie, and.. it's just awkward.

A regular hug though, that's okay. It can last longer than usual and still not be a problem, because at least, you know, you won't be hugging for half an hour, at some point soon you'll let go. And it feels nice, you know? From someone I care about and trust anyway~ it's like a physical way of saying "I love you" and it's nice to have someone's arms holding you, to wrap yours around them and just hold them tight.. you both feel warm inside and secure and wanted. I wouldn't be keen on a hug from a stranger or an acquaintance, even a new-ish friend. But someone who's close to me? All the hugs. Give me the hugs, let me hug you back, many many hugs. X)

_

Morning, afternoon or night?

Night! Actually I love those really early mornings, you know when the air still has that kind of... Crispness to it. That is amazing. But I'm never awake for that anymore.

(^▽ ^;)ゞ

_

What reminds you of home?

Thunderstorms, loud planes overhead, chinook noises, soft hugs when I'm upset, mum's cooking, pictures of our old dog Harvey, little fluffy dogs running about.

Most of this is easy to figure out I'm sure, but I do want to talk about the first couple.

Until the age of 11 my family lived on a military air base, so there were always big planes taking off and landing, and I really do mean always. We learned the difference between some of them by sound. I could be sat at home and we'd hear one and know, that had to be a Herc landing (landing always sounded different to taking off), or a teacher would have to stop talking at school to let one go by, and everyone knew that one was a VC10. (VC10s are the LOUDEST thing I have ever heard to this day. I'd probably still recognise one now~)

We also saw and heard Chinooks a lot. Now for anyone who doesn't know, those are the weird helicopters that have two... Fan parts? I don't actually know what they're called. X') (I looked it up, they're called rotors!) They kinda look like the bit of a retro telephone that you'd pick up and hold to your face.

Now having two rotors means that they can carry a Lot of weight, but it also means they don't sound like normal helicopters do. The two rotors are timed out so that the blades from each side can go through the same middle space without hitting each other, Left blade then right blade then left then right then left, and you can kind of hear it happening. Instead of the kind of 'Wubbubbubbubbubbub' of normal helicopters, a chinook sounds more like 'Wokka wokka wokka wokka'.

Where I am now, we only hear some small jets once a week at most when they take practice flights, and sometimes a normal police or ambulance helicopter. It took me a long time to get used to the quiet of most places, and sometimes I miss all the overhead noise we had back then.

And we got so many thunderstorms! Every single summer, usually at night. Now that I think about it the pollution from all the aircraft might have been involved in this too. >w>" But I loved it. We'd all gather in mum's room and open the curtains wide to watch. My little sister was scared of thunder back then so it was better for her to have people around and to make it fun. I was always just excited! And I still get that way if I hear thunder now~

[theorynexus]

Double Fives are first, today-- or two together-arranged, 55, I should say.

Also, we’re at Meat 30.   It would seem Jake, Karkat, and Dave are spending time together, this time.

Oh gosh...   I hope Karkat wasn’t made to endure that, considering he supposedly only ever left his house once per year, even if that might be a hyperbole. @w@            His interests and Jake’s are strongly opposed on that from, it would seem.   Thus, it might have been bad for deal-making, for reasons of souring Karkat’s mood; regardless, let’s see whether their other interests might align, or some non-detrimental arrangement (for Karkat, but hopefully for Jake too) might be found between them.

Ouch.    On the other hand, at least Karkat seems to have (likely) become more comfortable with outward signs of his blood’s color.   I doubt he would have failed to realize that it likely gives that impression, even if he originally intended it to be a sign of his closeness with Dave. He almost certainly would have semi-paranoid-ly weighed the pros and cons for his emotional well-being and/or all other consequences involved, and only come to the decision that the suit was acceptable for him to wear after deciding both connotations were acceptable.

Honestly, all things considered, Jake is very much correct. Considering the boost from all his rungs on the escheladder, there’s no way his physical capabilities should be that bad.  ... Though Jake’s estimates probably would be wrong for any other sort of being that was traveling with him. I don’t think his expectations are probably all that well gauged to the individuals in his company. It’s not that I think poorly of his intelligence, mind you. It’s just that Jake can be... rather oblivious, sometimes, if memory serves.

Yeah, his judgment is totally based on his own experience. Still, though, even coated in like 5 layers of fur, Karkat shouldn’t be that worn out. At least, from a world-building perspective, this doesn’t contradict the established rule that-- oh, wait, that was ghosts changing to fit the person’s perceptions, not God Tier players’ appearances, wasn’t it?  Hmmm.

Yes. Karkat’s diplomatic skills are impeccable.  There is absolutely nobody that can beat this guy when it comes to maintaining good relationships and reputations among the important powers of the world--- nobody!

I would suspect that Alt!Calliope is being petty, here, but I think it’s just Karkat being so tired that his coordination has dropped a bit.   (Also, this is honestly rather cute, and I appreciate the opportunity to giggle at it.)

Frack, Dave is good at bringing things up in the most awkward way possible. Also, that Karkat only estimates himself as being able to beat 99% of all humans in a “threshecution threshing match” is both quite comical and somewhat sad. ._. One Percent is a whole lot of people.

***facepalms with the greatest of groans***    SHE REALLY SHOULD FRICKING NOT!!!                        (Internet freedom for all!)   That said:  GAH, Dave, are you trying to sabotage Karkat’s chances, here? On the other hand: Maybe this propensity for blunt, careless words is one of the reasons that he decided he didn’t want to run for President, himself.   If so, good on him, I guess, for knowing himself that well.

( I will say, though, that that was honestly a nice segue, despite the fact that he sortof botched the lead-up to this via his rudeness.    Karkat gets a pass, though, because everyone knows he’s crude, and that’s part of the appeal.)

The real question is:  Are these campaign dollars as in a certain allocated amount that is allowed for each candidate, or money which was donated to the campaign by those who support them and/or Dave/Karkat?  That is a pretty important distinction, politically.  Not that either will likely be addressed and/or matter directly to the outcome of the race, probably. Oh, and those adds sound incredibly silly. I am not 100% sure that they will actually in all likelihood be effective, but they sure do sound comic-(sans)-ical. On the other hand:  Jake seems to be trying to mentally suppress what’s happening to him, probably due to his feelings toward Jane.   Welp.   :|

This is a very complicated issue, and for the sake of not offending either side, I shall choose to remain silent on the real world matter at hand, here.  On the other hand, I love the way that Karkat is just like, “SHUT UP, ALREADY.”   XD

Reminds me of Caliborn.     Indeed, that is definitely the reason why such committees are actually put into place (other than the compelling economic reasons incentives).    Doesn’t mean that they actually succeed in doing so perfectly, however.    It just makes it a grey “I guess maybe they were involved,” regardless of whether the person actually suggested such adds ought go into effect or not. Buuuuut... I’m going to refrain from pushing my promised non-commentary further than that-- and only did comment with this because of its relevance to Jake’s thought process.

It seems that Karkat agrees with my assessment of this matter.  Also, Alt!Calliope sure is quite sassy, compared to the grim and highly reserved person I thought she was. I wonder if it’s because she’s been watching essentially television for eons in order to properly understand humanity+maybe the trolls or whatever, or if it’s because she’s doing it on accident, as was my initial guess/impression, as related earlier in my liveblogs.

That’s not the point, Dave. The point is that, for one, it probably makes the audience think of you as irresponsible; secondly, it wastes the most precious resource in politics: the citizens’ limited attention spans; finally, it may actually make the two of you come off as being condescending and/or not having any actual idea what you’re talking about, which would be absolutely horrible for your chances, come election time.    While campaigns can indeed turn around in the latter months of election season, first impressions are also very important!

That is a very interesting point/question. And very ironic for him to ask; not that Dave actually can’t be properly understood through his layers of irony-- but rather, while he does indeed have a talent for that, his other qualities obscure it so badly as to make it seem quite unremarkable and hidden. And there Dave goes again, saying “thats basically true [sic.]”.   Magnificent. ***will not touch the matter of how straight-forward Dirk is***

...     Man.  Hopefully, this will serve as a lesson to the both of them.    Jake’s reaction is so bloody on the point, though. @w@

I do honestly appreciate that too.  Wow, though, he is being surprisingly civil and respectful as a result of this.  It shouldn’t honestly be a surprise, considering who Jake is.  It’s just... wow. I really appreciate the breath of fresh air.

Yeeeeesss!!!~    <3       I love everything about this that follows!    While he can be quite oblivious at times, I have always thought that Jake’s intelligence was top-notch, and I quite appreciate his flexing it, as well as that wonderfully noted breath of FREEDOM whizzing into his sails!

Boooooo!!!~     I really quite appreciate the correct and excellent display of entomological knowledge, here, but DANG, if Dirk isn’t a slimy piece of garbage, sometimes!     I mean, my gosh, the sociopathic logic, here.  It’s horrific! As for Jake:  I am very proud of him, and appreciate his very appropriate question. Everyone should ask the qualities that politicians bring to the table, policy-wise, and their (+ dis-)advantages--- not just how charismatic they are. Of course, such a statement is stating the obvious. ‘s still good to see it in practice. ... Wow, I really love Alt!Calliope’s sass. So much.

HECK YES! :’D

***grooooaaan***    

FINALLY, CERTAINTY!!!

Aside from his lack of attraction for her, which says nothing of importance, I do in fact agree with Karkat, here.  This is essentially the equivalent of the moment when the United States switched to the Constitution, and the country absolutely needed a Washington.  If Adams had actually been elected, instead of getting the second-highest sum of votes, then both the contry and the entire world could have turned out quite differently.  I, too, do  believe that Crocker could be reasonably said to have a fair chance at acting as a President who doesn’t really shake things up too terribly, and actually manages to set a perfectly fine, perhaps above average standard for Presidents to come.   There are, however, certain points in history which require great leaders if things are going to pan out well in the long-term. Crocker just presents far too many potential problems while not offering enough in the way of positives for me to give a strong endorsement of her, despite my desire to see a female president eventually take office in the United States’ equivalent of the station she and Karkat are competing over.

(SUPPORT KARKAT FOR HIS BETTER APPRECIATION OF FUNDAMENTAL PHILOSOPHICAL ORDERS OF IMPORTANCE.)

Yeeeeaaaahhh...   She was already quite twisted up (read: pained) inside during the session as a result of her concern for maintaining appearances and manipulating peoples’ perceptions of her, unless my memory is horrible in this particular act of dredging up long-ago readings’ implications, so I could certainly see that growing to be a problem as she grew up.    I’d sortof hoped that that would cease to be so much of an issue, after their session was won, considering the rewards involved/gained as a result of that.    :/

...    Yeah, that is a good deal of whiplash. I am honestly pained.

Dangit, I was so swept up in my spiel about the direct political consequences of that decision/strategy that I forgot to emphasize the very obvious danger of it actually alienating Jake from her!

***sobs***   I am so proud of him!    (Though this is not exactly the best reason for choosing one’s political decisions, I can definitely get behind the idea of him striving for independence from that manipulative cur.) 

What Dave said, but less profanity-laced! Also:   Am I incorrect in remembering that God Tier players past a certain Tier are able to wield any weapon they desire, regardless of whether they have a       Kind Abstratus of the appropriate sort in their strife specibus?  That could become relevant, some time in the near future.

[owl-quill]

Sooo, nobody expressed a preference what I should work on, buuuuut @abutterflyobsession mentioned elsewhere she liked Bog and Dawn BroTP stuff, so I cleaned up chapter 2 of my PixiePine story. Here’s chapter 1 on AO3

Dawn followed Bog’s lead. The scrape and clicking of his armour echoed faintly, but they arrived at the entrance she had avoided because there were noises coming from there without incident. He hesitated, but leaned towards it.

“Do you want to go in there?” Dawn whispered, hovering behind Bog to get closer to his ear. It made him twitch a little bit, as if the sound of her voice had surprised her.

“Yeah. I need to ask some questions. Of goblins.” He held out the stick with the inert cobweb orb to her. “Take this. Hold this for me. Stay hidden. Be careful.”

“You too.”

He gave her a nod before stalking into the deeper dark of the corridor leading to the sleeping quarters. He could hear a lot of people’s calm breath, and some people snoring. There was light filtering through the central column, which was open to the sky, and between that and his memory and carefully feeling his way, Bog made it to the first cubby. Behind a coarse weave curtain was a small room with… two cots? Giving his eyes a few moments to adjust, Bog considered, but speculation proved superfluous when behind a potato-shaped lump the expected size, he made out the characteristic snapper face, this one with one antenna shorter than the other. So Stuff and Thang were sharing quarters now? Well, good for them.

After hesitating briefly - this could go very wrong - he ducked inside and, kneeling next to the cot, leaned close to his former right hand, and whispered. “Stuff? Stuff, wake up.” After a bit more of that, and a quiet grumble from the smaller goblin, Stuff opened her eyes a little, grumbled, and squinted.

She sat up and breathed in; Bog raised a hand. “Quiet, please. I just have a few questions.”

She threw her hands over her mouth and took a moment to gather her wits. In a strained whisper she said, “Sire? You’re back?!”

“It’s complicated. Listen, Stuff, this is important.”

“Yes?”

“First, how is my mother?” She had visited him a few times, but that seemed to have stopped long ago, if he could trust his feeling of time.

“I’m not sure…”

“What happened to her?” Bog tensed, his wings flicking involuntarily. If Sugar Plum had harmed her, he would find a way to make her regret it.

“Not– nothing as far as I know. I mean, after the third time she tried to free you, the, the new queen banished her from the castle. Griselda said she would go and visit her cousins out East. Haven’t heard from her, good or bad, since.”

Well. That deferred that question until later. Bog hoped she was all right, and tried to not feel too relieved that he would not have to deal with her meddling right now. He settled back.

“Is the Sugar Plum Fairy a good queen?”

His answer was silence. Bog sighed. “No test, no trick. I want to know if I need to try to take her down, or if she can stay were she is. I want an honest answer.”

“Well, she’s… different? She lifted the ban on love, er.”

Bog made a dismissive gesture. “I know it wasn’t popular. What about consequences? Is the Dark Forest in chaos?”

“I’m afraid not? I mean, not more than usual. She… does a decent job at arbitering problems brought before her. She couldn’t wrap her head around logistics, but she found or had trained good people for it. Winter stores were very good last year even though the year was nothing special. And she’s working on trade deals with the fairies, but being careful about it and humouring the elders…”

“Sounds good. I shall trust your judgement.”

“Sorry, sire? What will you do?”

“Talk to her. I have no intention of causing trouble, but I need to talk to her. Could you arrange that?”

“How…?”

“Just give me a few minutes’ headstart, then tell her about it. I’ll wait in the throne room.”

“As you say, sire.”

“Thank you. And to avoid… misunderstandings, how about if you call me Bog.”

“Uh. I’ll try to remember.”

“Good.”

Bog retreated from the cubby, where Stuff started hissing something at Thang. Bog took to the wing when he reached the small corridor leading out of the main tower, and in the main corridor alighted and looked around for Dawn.

She floated down from the ceiling. “Everything all right?”

“Yeah, we should be able to see the Sugar Plum Queen soon. Come on.” He led her with the confidence of someone moving through his own home, for that’s what this castle was. He had grown up here. It was strange to think that it was not his any more but… He had spent a lot of time isolated, alone, and without any responsibilities. He couldn’t say he missed trying to get several hordes of goblins organised and impressed enough to avoid anyone challenging him.

The throne room was lit by a half moon casting a slanted pillar of light through the glassed skylight onto the weathered floor. Bog considered taking station in the shadows near the wall opposite the throne to get a chance at something resembling an entrance, and instead stood close to the set of stairs that led into the slightly higher part of the room which held the throne.

Bog turned to Dawn and held out his hand. She gave him the cobweb orb immediately, and then didn’t quite seem to know what to do with her hands. She looked around at the different entrances and niches and holes.

“What’s going to happen?”

“Someone, or some people are going to show up. I hope it will be the Sugar Plum Queen and maybe a few goblins. We will tell her about the danger for the kingdom and then… we’ll see what happens. Or she doesn’t trust me and sends in goblins she trusts to take me prisoner again. Or she weaves a spell I didn’t know she had.” Whatever happened, it would be more interesting than his day would have been if Dawn had not shown up. But the fairy princess had obviously been prepared for stealth. “Would you prefer to leave now?”

She straightened out her arms at her sides, hands balled to fists. “I’ll stay. I’ll tell them about Roland. I’ve met him. That’s better. First-hand information is more reliable, and I can answer questions.”

“Thank you.” Bog gave her a slight bow, which drew a smile from her.

Silence played on their nerves, ragging their edges. Bog found that looking up into the moonlight was soothing. There were half-formed thoughts in the back of his head wanting to link it with the light of the orb prison, but they dissipated when a bluer light entered the throne room in a swoop. The sounds of goblins coming closer followed.

The Sugar Plum Fairy hovered a way left and above the throne, looking at the former king with narrowed eyes. Half a dozen goblins emerged from the corridor she had come out of and spread out. Gaze flicking to the soot-covered fairy, she said, “I guess that answers how you freed yourself. You didn’t.”

Bog, the stick with the dark cobweb orb in his left, bowed to her, making her float upwards a little and curl her tail in surprise. “Please don’t hold it against her, your majesty. She has important news.”

Floating closer to them slowly, she asked, “Bog, what are you playing at? I was expecting a fight and you disappoint me!”

“I don’t want to fight. I want to talk.” He could hear more goblins behind him, above him. He didn’t have to look around to know they were coming out of various cubbyholes to watch. There were awed sounds and hisses and whispers. His wings flicked in irritation and he fought down an impulse to flare his pauldrons to look bigger. “We want to talk.”

Dawn, who was standing a step right and behind him, leaned to the right to look around him, and waved the fingers of one hand at the queen. The whispers grew louder. More voices. “It’s really him!” “What will happen now?” “If they fight, who do you back?” “Betcha we’ll have a king again tomorrow.”

Was the whole crew waking up and flooding the throne room? But even if, it shouldn’t make Bog nervous enough for his wings to jitter. He seemed to be able to hear every single voice clearly, but it made it hard to focus on Plum, and reading her right was absolutely necessary.

“Talk, you say? I’m supposed to believe that?”

“Rip off his wings this time!” someone yelled from the back of the room.

“He’s a goblin, you traitor!”

The queen raised her voice, making Bog flinch. “Stop it right now!” It got the attention of nearby goblins, but not those arguing at the back of the great hall.

Bog turned, aghast. Outside a quiet circle around the queen, more arguments broke out. Bog tried to reach for the authority he used to be able to command, but he couldn’t think, each voice getting a hook into his attention and they all dragging it into different directions.

Then a painfully high voice screamed, drawn out, “QUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!”

When Dawn’s scream faded, every goblin was covering their ears, including Bog, who had dropped the stick. The orb remained undamaged. Bog was not so sure about his hearing.

The fairy princes gave a decisive little nod. “Queen Aura, please let us talk somewhere more privately. It will most likely be more productive.”

“Maybe. Who are you, under all that dirt?”

She hesitated a bare moment. “I’m Princess Dawn, Dagda’s daughter, princess of the Fair Fields.”

“Oh, cute. Well, if you say you have important news, I might listen.” She pointed at the prison Bog had built for her, and her voice dropped to a snarl. “But that thing stays here, active or not!”

“What?” Bog’s ears were still ringing.

The Sugar Plum Fairy caught Dawn’s eye, then looked at Bog and waved in an unmistakable gesture for them to follow, before floating to an empty hole far above ground.

Dawn pointed at the stick, then made a warding gesture. “That stays here.” She pointed at Bog, then herself, then Sugar Plum. “We follow.”

Bog nodded, and they both took to the air. Dawn stopped, fluttering, finding the hole smaller than expected, and indeed too small for her wings. Bog held out an arm. “I know that route,” he said louder than necessary. “I can carry you.”

Hesitating a few moments, looking down at the agitated goblins, Dawn finally nodded and slung her arms around Bog’s neck before furling her wings. He pulled her towards him, his narrow, vibrating wings taking them through the dark, winding hole safely.

When they reached a small platform at the end of the tunnel, Bog thought his hearing was going back to normal, judging by the sound and echo of his wings. In the silence after landing, he said quietly, “Uh. Thank you. That was… necessary.”

“I saw how nervous it made you. You wings…”

Bog cleared his throat. “I’m not used to crowds any more, it seems. Anyway. Thanks. But. Please don’t do that again when I’m standing next to you.”

“Oh. OK.”

“Good.”

Around a corner there was amber light mixed with blue in a study that had once been his own.

[nessiemccormick]

All nosy asks please

This one is reaaally long so Im putting it under a read more (that hopefully works on mobile ;;;)

THANK YOUU!!! Oh my god hERE I GO

0:Height1.57m aaand in ft I think it’s 5,41: Age25 :c2: Shoe sizeReally?? I’m a, uhh… 36, and 37 depending of the shoe. I have little feet, don’t make fun of me ;;3: Do you smoke?Nope! My lungs are very weak even for the smoke!4: Do you drink?A little bit! I’m a lightweight tho 5: Do you take drugs?Already answered!6: Age you get mistaken forThis is veeery embarrassing, but I’m always told I’m 16  And when I tell them that no, I’m 25, their faces change!!! It’s hilarious!7: Have tattoos?Answered!8: Want any tattoos?Answered!9: Got any piercings?No ;;;10: Want any piercings?I’ve always wanted one on my belly haha bUuuuut as I said before, I have a crippling fear of needles (and my tummy is not suited for piercings)11: Best friend?I can’t decide ;;;12: Relationship statusSingle, for a long, long time and more time to come13: Biggest turn onsI don’t really feel these ;;; bUT I’m gonna treat it as something I like. Blue eyes, lean figure, blond hair… Klavier Gavin.14: Biggest turn offsDIRTY STUFF. 15: Favorite movieNghhh Kill Bill 1,2,3. YES I LIKE KATANAS AND BADASS GIRLS.16: I’ll love you if…Already answered :(17: Someone you missAh :(18: Most traumatic experienceSomething really really embarrassing happened during my tender years of primary school and it ended up in laughter while I was suffering. That, or when I learned my father actually hit me, and that I had repressed all those memories (I still get them from time to time, it feels awful)19: A fact about your personalityI can say another one! I am very cheerful but when overwhelmed, I go to hide somewhere, asks for some time alone, scream on a pillow, and I’m back to being cheerful!20: What I hate most about myselfEVERYTHING.21: What I love most about myselfI can never say ;;; sorry22: What I want to be when I get olderI’m already older ;;; But I guess I wanna be living my dream; a small house with a lovely garden, lots of canvas to paint and lots of time to draw. And a nice partner! And cats! And chickens!23: My relationship with my sibling(s)It’s really good!24: My relationship with my parent(s)It’s… complicated. Mom is good, dad is… it’s good but sometimes it’s not.25: My idea of a perfect dateAlready answered!! I won’t embarrass myself again!!26: My biggest pet peevesAhh i guess the chewing with an open mouth!!!! And making noise when eating!!!! And leaving the bathroom door open!27: A description of the girl/boy I like… I’d rather not.28: A description of the person I dislike the mostI am his spitting image. But I can’t say I hate him; I don’t really hate anyone, even if they’ve damaged me.29: A reason I’ve lied to a friendAlready answered!30: What I hate the most about work/schoolAlready answered 31: What my last text message says“Oye what what???? What?????”32: What words upset me the mostHate, ok, clavicordio, clavecín33: What words make me feel the best about myselfAlready answered!34: What I find attractive in womenHHHHhhh I… i like that they’re like, so much more delicate than me, like… smooth?? Soft??? I love that! Very cute!!! Very beautiful!! And if a woman is funny, likes listening to me and laughs at my awful jokes, they’re perfect!! I hit the jackpot!! Which will never happen!! Because I don’t think someone like that could have eyes for me!! lol35: What I find attractive in menMen without beards!! I don’t like beards, they’re kind of… yuck to me, I’m sorry! I also like delicate looking men! Kinda like high cheekbones and defined jawline and all that Jazz. I love almond shaped eyes too!! It makes for a very pretty stare, I love it!!And blue eyes make me go weak in the knees  for both!! 36: Where I would like to liveI want to live in a beautiful place, something that’s way more advanced than the town I live in, a place that’s open to changes and new people  and while you guys probably have snow and hate it, I WANT SNOW SO BAD AND A PLACE WITH SNOW SOUNDS PERFECT TO ME!37: One of my insecuritiesMyself. I don’t trust myself, nor my decisions, not my actions. Nothing.38: My childhood career choiceAlready answered  Oh yes, and I also wanted to become a paleontologist.39: My favorite ice cream flavorCHOCOLATE!!!40: Who I wish I could beI’m choosing not to answer this one either.41: Where I want to be right nowIn a faraway country, really far from here, living my dream.42: The last thing I ateCookies!43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediatelyIM THINKING KLAVIER BUT THAT’S NOT VALID AND IM ALSO NOT CHOOSING TO ANSWER 44: A random fact about anythingIf you do a small thing for me, no matter what it is, I’ll love you and cherish you forever!OH GOD THESE ARE A LOT!! thank you!!!!! I never expected someone to ask me to answer them all, and I love the distraction :,) It got a little bit too personal at some point, and I’m sorry for that ;;; 

But if you’re still here reading, I wanted to tell you that you’re amazing, and you’re gonna have a beautiful day!!! Because you deserve it!!!

[tumblunni]

The big post about how i love my sneasel who is great

Welcome to that post. It might get long.

Reaper the level 100 Naughty nature Sneasel with Keen Eye who experienced pokerus once and has contest ribbons from too many regions oh my gosh Leeeeeeets get going on how much I adore my little guy!

Okay, the story behind him. He is kinda unofficially my starter pokemon?

Cos of course there was no way to keep your mons from RBY and GSC back then, but I’d kinda only had one pokemon anyway. I was a dumb kid who just solo’d both games with my raichu Chuppy. And sadly I ended up losing them even before the whole transfer issue, someone stole my Gold cartridge during school and when I found it half smashed in the playground all the data had been corrupted. It did actually play though, just with some colour issues I think? I never really restarted cos it felt cruel to Chuppy to do it. So I’m happy that the virtual console rerelease let me reincarnate Chuppy and even make them a cool new alola form! (though they had a different gender this time, but meh i get to headcanon my chu is trans like me, haha) So yeah thats the story of my official first pokemon, but Chuppy didnt really have any personality or headcanons back then cos I was so new to the franchise. And Reaper ended up lasting way longer and sharing every single other region with me, so he kinda took the spot of ‘starter’ even if he wasnt ‘first’. (I still was really happy to welcome reincarnation Chuppy home tho!)

Reaper actually came from Pokemon Colosseum, of all places! His OT name is the completely-wrong ‘Tom’ cos he was from when I restarted my game after getting stuck and just buttonmashed one of the default names out of frustration. I actually caught him in a master ball just cos I was that excited to hug the lil guy! Sneasel was my fave gen 2 mon but i never managed to catch one actually in GSC, i didnt know it was limited to a rare encounter in the very last area. And even before I caught him I knew sneasel was in this game via guides, so i was waiting with baited breath and establishing headcanons even before i found him. Then I just COULD NOT WAIT, hence the master ball! XD I kinda preemptivel based him on the iron mask marauder’s sneasel from the celebi movie, cos shadow pokemon are similar to his brainwashing stuff. And I always liked his sneasel, scizor and tyranitar, for such minor roles they are. It was a nice nuance for the bad guy’s pokemon to be shown as VERY MUCH not evil, just enslaved by magic brainwashing and mistreated. It warmed my heart seeing them freeing each other and escaping in the end once the control was broken! But also it established sneasel as a really cool badass fighter that I wanted to have someday, yknow?

So yeah I got this guy from colosseum before I even played RSE, and he ended up being my ‘starter’ in that game so much that i cant even remember which one i picked. I boxed it right away and never thought about it again, I was a callous kid! It was actually really interesting playing ORAS and finally getting to see what the hoenn starters are actually like, lol And Reaper remained my best friend across like ELEVEN OR MORE REPLAYS of every single gen 3 game except emerald. Cos at that time in my childhood i literally did not have any other games. i spent around three or four years with just sapphire, leafgreen and final fantasy tactics advance. (Oh boy that game’s script is stuck in my brain for all time) And getting attatched to the characters and making new ones all the time was how i kept from getting bored this way ^_^ Buuuuut... it kinda meant that I just discarded most of them super fast to make more. the only other pokemon that migrated to sinnoh with Reaper was Nether the sableye, who was kinda his rival/best friend. (Tho I mispelled it as Neava so he’s stuck that way, lol. And both of them are in all caps forever...) Nether is kinda the basis for my recent oc Malachi, so he’s like an entirely different story for another time. But he was my Sapphire buddy and Reaper was one region older via the power of spinoffs.

And oh man yeah i totally loved the shadow pokemon plot lol! I just headcanoned his plot with regards to that was the same as the marauder’s mons. Perfectly nice tiny sneasel boy is kidnapped and experimented upon by evils, but my love saved him and now he is soft once more. He didnt really have much angst from it, but it helped such a wild spirit grow to trust my hero and trust humans in general after such a rocky introduction to them. I imagined it was like training a dangerous dog to be a police canine, with that arm guard thing that they bite! Shadow pokemon training must be WAY more tough than it seems on the surface! So like ash’s charizard plot, where it ends up with really fire forged family love after all the hardship. I think that before he met my trainer he was just like a loner robin hood type character who valued his freedom and thought that tamed pokemon were all wusses. But alas, he was forced to experience human hugs, and now he’s addicted! but he’d still be quite rebellious and wild and have a lot of goofy cute interactions as he tries to learn all this complicated stuff about being a pet. Why cant I pee on the carpet?? Why do I have to eat pellet food? Why are you mad when i bring you dead mice and pidgey eggs?? bad bad influence on the other mons, but also a softhearted big bro who WANTS to be a good influence. He pretends to be all aloof and stoic cliche angsty antihero, but always messes up and looks cute instead! And he gets crushingly sad if any of his lil siblings actually does get afraid of him. Noooo the grumpyness is for the humans! Not for you!! No-one is allowed to pet the sneas except the other pokemon. It my duty to protect my new pack of strangely shaped sneasels! Oh and he likes booze. In human terms he’d be around 25-30, but still its not good for animals to drink human liquor. Never stopped him though! He’d always find ways to sniff it out and swipe half-finished cans from the trash and stuff. Bad angstman! I know thats part of your archetype but stop it!

So... basically he was like.. cloud? original version from ff7 where he was sassy and goofy sometimes, except reaper is like that all the time with less angst and pretty much zero ego. He’s just like a kind yet not completely competant fun uncle who tries his best to put up a cool guy front to impress the kids (and push away scary humans) but his innate sweetness means he always messes up. And he’s super tsundere about the fact he considers his trainer part of his infinate pack of children, even if every other human is DANGER MODE. Must protect this human from the other ones! Must teach them the ways of the sneas! Oh, and I imagined his appearance as a gijinka would be kinda like Squall from ff8. cos he actually started off as a parody of that unlikeable angstman archetype, and i didnt even know Cloud existed until yeaaaars later. (Played the ffs completely out of order...) So i figured he’d be like squall but with dark skin and a kinda sirus black hairstyle. (Cos that guy contributed the kind uncle part of his inspiration!) Oh and of course a sneasely colourscheme for the fur coat. And I ended up making him hold Blackglasses so often that it was an in-joke that he actually wore shades 24/7 even in normal pokemon form XD

When I first got him in Collosseum he was really useful for his Brick Break move, and im actually really happy that the brick break image on bulbapedia is the collosseum sneasel using it! It was very very good as one of the few mons available with that move in the very limited choices you had for that game. But his signature move kinda ended up being Surf, even though his stats would have been awful for it even if I’d ev trained him properly XD I just found it so bizarre that sneasel of all things could learn that HM! I imagined he formed a surfboard out of ice to carry the trainer, cos there’s no way you could stand on the back of a 30cm tall weasel...

And man lets just have some random sneasel headcanons now!

* Their feathers exist to sense wind fluctuations, which are useful in their natural environment to anticipate snowstorms and track prey in low visibility.

* The ear feather is just for this, its the more sensitive one. The tail feathers are more for manipulating objects and other day to day life. They’re more matted and dont really have the same hearing ability, but the joints are way more flexible so they can be moved independantly like three actual tails. Sneasels can pick up small delicate objects by brushing them up between the tails, then rolling them down their back to reach their mouth. they also use the tails to brush away dirt, hide their tracks in the snow, form surprisingly intricate igloo-like nests and groom their fur with the utmost precision.

* Sneasels will outright resent any attempts to groom them by anyone but their closest human friend, since inevitably humans cant do as good of a job. But humans can scratch behind your ears and give cuddles, so it all works out!

* In the wild, sneasels eat primarily eggs, some nuts and berries, scavenged semi-rotten meat and not so much live prey. Even though they’re very skilled, they’re also very fragile and cautious because of it. They’ll only hunt in extreme situations, instead preferring to confuse and mislead their way to dinner. Sneasels are very social and loyal to each other even if they’re not to anyone else. Their most common strategy is the whole pack wards off a dangerous foe while one lone unit sneaks past and robs that pokemon’s food stores, to share with the family. Even if they’re forced to hunt their own prey, they still follow these strategies and try to just outrun the enemy until it dies of exhaustion or freezes in the blizzard. They’re experts of making cuts that disable but don’t kill- going in close enough to deliver that final blow means risking a valuable pack member’s life!

Not really a headcanon now but back to reaper himself, I always kinda imagine him looking more like a real weasel. I like sneasel’s design but the bipedal humanoid proportions arent exactly the best thing, yknow? i feel like it should have had shorter more pawlike back legs and just been top-heavy with the super claws. Like.. I imagine kinda a furret? just the appeal of actual weasels and stoats plz. I love sneasel but when i looked up weasels as a kid i was like MY HEART!!! they’re sock puppet babies with lint fuzz faces Also I think sneasel’s claws are kinda comically short and boring considering theyre like its Big Feature. I liked when they were drawn a bit longer in older artworks, and i always imagined reaper had longer ones like scyther-y level. Thats why I named him that! Crescent moon claws of awesomeness, striking in the night~! ...he would be really cool if he wasnt such a cuddly dork. I love him so much, he’s my baby. And my dad. And my uncle?? he’s just a very good friend and im happy videogames can touch my heart like nothing else let me love my nonexistant magic weasel from cyberspace forevermore~!

[kissmethroughthebone]

So, I did something foolish, and yet still empowering.

I hooked up with a man, to get over my ex. Just a passive fling, nothing much.

Did it work? Yes. Now I can stop thinking of that terrible gutless man, and have new memories of the sexy new guy that can give AMAAAAZING massages, tells me how much he adores my body, and can do absurdly atrocious and yet goddamned godly things to the inside and out of my vagina.

Does he adore me, or even *like* me? Past sex, probably not. I'm not even gonna waste time pondering on it. Since of course a man will drop everything to have sex with me for a few hours in exchange for whatever food I feel like and lots of orgasms, BUT not for a late night conversation or bothering to maintain whatever friendship was forming from before.

But, I am a sucker for flings, which has hurt me in the past......

So as I broke up with my ex, I:

Met a new guy. Incredibly hot, incredibly fine, somewhat suave but quirky. Had lots in common. But he kept beating around the bush about however he felt for me. Long story short, I cut him off, and then found out he was doing his "i really really like you quite a lot" schtick with other girls... Same pet names, same flirtations and every thing. Grossssss. A simple "I'm not interested romantically but enjoy a very casual thing", or something, would suffice..... But, men play games.

Met another guy. Sweet, cute; also a virgin at 21 years of age, which made me wonder if I could make him into a trick or so..... He ended up losing interest first. Never fully explained why, other than vague stuff about how he's inexperienced or something... I try not to think about it, it probably would hurt my feelings knowing I put in some effort with the guy.

Met ANOTHER person. They were great, buuuuut men make things complicated, so instead of a straight up "I think you're great, but am not interested".... You guessed it! Got lead on.

And now, I scored a decent enough fellow that would pay for my food without hesitation, and thinks I'm the finest woman he's ever laid eyes on. BUT is not as into me as I am into them.

Shame I never learn, it seems!

Self notes:

If a man isn't chasing you, he doesn't want you, period.

You can steer his interest if you want, but then it's too many mind games to keep them around. "Do I text back fast? Do I respond slow? One word? Ask questions? Am I asking too many questions? Too blunt, too prudish, too open?" Shush. You're great. Just leave him when you can tell you're gonna lose yourself over them. Better to leave, than to stay and hate.

And of course, all men are the same. Rowan was a fine as hell "sensitive" UK guy who messaged me every morning, Kieran was a marxist bass player type guy who bad more feminine traits and supposedly preferred honesty with others, Cam was the sensitive type with zero experience whatsoever....

But, of course, they weren't too different from any other guy.

If they weren't interested, they'd distant without a second thought. If they wanted me, they'd reply INSTANTLY. Lots of things, truly.

And if sex was hinted at or available, it would be what they wanted. And once it was had, any obligation to be sweet, kind, or remotely interested was gone.

Sad, since the recent FWB had been so polite and sweet before..... But we can't hit that "oh this girl I don't know is so sweet, and very polite, I don't know why men disrespect her often?", sorta thing again. Since welp, the sex was had, and since we had sex two days in a row, they probably think I am "an easy lay", like they said another guy had probably thought of me.

(Which isn't entirely a lie, but not the truth, either; Marco was a guy who used me for sex and lied too much when I was younger. And fast forward some time later, he went from ghosting to begging for me to come back, offering to suck my toes, give oral sex, buy me rooms, food, jewelry, rides... Anything at all, if it got me back to him eventually.)

Men are useless. If they're FWBs, they'll only semi-respect you if they know you prior to sex a bit more in person. If they don't past texts, then, you're fucked, and they won't give a damn.

Ironically, men are more prone to care about you long term, even when you both agree to not have any strings attached.... If you stray from having sex. (Yes, true.)

Or if they're whipped before even meeting, or if you don't care as much as they'd expect you to.... then boom, they will chase after your emotions since they've already had your pussy.

Men are pathetic.

Just get more things from them. I only did it with my most recent guy since I really wanted a new person to fantasize over. (WHOOHOO, NO MORE HAUNTED MEMORIES FROM THE TERRIBLE MAN I DATED FOR HALF A YEAR! More hot guys with sexy dad bods that give KILLER massages and can bury their face in my pussy for ages.)

God, that boy is mad blessed.... Whew, blessed!

Anyway. Aiming for less emotional attachments to men. I think I should just go for more fuckboy types; the ones that show up in my DMs spamming me, instead of the ones who I chase.

Since honestly, I don't feel too attracted to men very often. And at least with the most disappointing or unattractive men, they at least have the decency to be repulsive OFF THE BAT! Instead of a slow burn trap that feels like you'd have to gnaw your own leg off to freaking escape from...

Plus, I respect that the stupid or ugly ones in my area feel the need to "flex" with me. I'm naturally down to earth, (a.k.a. I didn't think a 19 year old withdrawing 500 from the bank is cute,) but seeing how hoelike these men can be..... fuck it. I can go "Let's just grab a burger and open up!", and they'll get annoyed, realize they have no real substance that would interest me and refuse to try to connect, past the dynamic of "i must woo this girl with my money as she strokes my ego and pretends that im fucking amazing", and they leave..... So fuck em.

I recently made a Yelp list of every high end restaurant in my city.

Any time an overly flashy and godawful guy comes into my DMs, trying to flirt, or strike up unprovoked conversation, I'll just hit them with a "So when are you gonna take my cute self out to eat? I hope it's somewhere nice to show me off at".

Then boom, get a guy to take me to a high end restaurant I'd take myself to. Keep him interested, but not stroke his ego. The typical "oh, this hot girl isn't interested in me??? How do i win her over????", and then..... oh look.... the restaurant is RIGHT next to the mall.....

Then from there, let's hope he spends.

Its worked in the past, should work now.

Peace yalls.

[tumblunni]

aaaaaaa rune factory 4 is SO GOOD i cant stop playing it i am so attatched to my tiny virtual friends already and the farm gameplay is really good even if you dont wanna focus on the story and characters seriously its such a refined and perfected form of the genre! so many different ways to make profit, so much so much to dooooo~ only problem i think is that the ‘soil health’ mechanic is really complicated and badly explained ive been playing for so long and still dont really know how on earth to work it and the magnifying glass that shows you ‘soil stats’ is so confusing cos its just a wall of numbers and you have no clue what any of them mean or how to raise/lower them or what ones should be high or low or what they effect?? and if you sickle a fully grown crop you get a new seed but is this how you’re meant to get the upgraded seeds? do i just keep growing and sickleing the same seed til it gets bonuses, or does it do nothing unless i figure out how to ‘level up’ the soil?? but still its perfectly easy to gain money and such even if you never figure out the soil thing its just annoying cos some of the quests require the soil thing, and i cant unlock other quests til i finish those, and i cant buy certain seeds, and etc buuuuut the game is such a great well-crafted sandbox that you can totally find some of the seeds you cant buy if you go off exploring stuff out-of-order and train up enough to survive in high level areas and wooooooo GRINDING PINEAPPLES BY STABBING PINEAPPLEMEN in an area 50 levels above my current story point! IM SO OVERLEVELLED NOW I LOVE MY PINEAPPLE FIELD its so funnnnnn so many cool thingsssss aaaaa and dylas is the most well executed tesundere love interest ive ever seen! and arthur is really cute and charming! and leon has a cool design and he’s pretty sassy and cool. And I wanna try romancing everybody to see their events because its so hard to make a choice on my spouse!!! and AAAA i still feel bad cos arthur was the first one i romanced and i dont wanna let any of these people down aaaaa glasses man and grumpy man and sass fox man and aaaa i havent even started befriending the others aaaaa so many good choices in this woooooorllld and its grandpa’s birthday today and I’m so bad i dont have the right ingredients to craft any sweets and i still dunno where you get the tea ingredients so i hope he’s okay with this strawberry milkshake and seriously i dropped everything and ran halfway across the worldmap while poisoned just to give arthur his birthday spectacles in time WHY AM I SO ATTATCHED TO THESE NONEXISTANT PEOPLE i love this whole town aaaa im gonna be so sad when this game is over