#it's not like i want to date him
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
one thing that took me embarrassingly long to learn is "sometimes when people say things, they will not be true."
I used to tell people about this revelation and they'd be like yeah.....duh.....but like, why wouldn't my base assumption be that you're communicating to me in a straightforward manner. anyway, I get scammed a lot.
#example: a 'friend' in middle school told me I should ask a guy out. she said 'he'll totally say yes'.#he did not. which was the obvious outcome#but it took me years to realize that she'd said that hoping to fuel some drama for her own entertainment.#ANOTHER EXAMPLE#a guy in college approached me saying that he'd been seeing me around campus but was always too shy to talk to me#and that he really wanted to get to know me#so I was like wow 🥺 romance 🥺 and hopped into bed with him#and afterward I was like what do you wanna do 😊 should we see a movie 😊 should we go out 😊#and he was like nope. byeeee.#and I realized I got bamboozled into sex#total shocked pikachu face#I'm still not the best at this tbh. I'm like 'why would this person lie to me. lying is bad'.#anyway this is why I not looking forward to entering the dating world again#DONT BAMBOOZLE ME I'M GULLIBLE
18K notes
·
View notes
Text
historical drama/sitcom where two gay best friends (woman and man) get lavender married--and proceed to spend the Fancy European Honeymoon their parents paid for acting as each other's wingman
#and hijinks ensue. obviously.#BONUS POINTS if they're gender nonconforming/questioning/trans coded#back at home they'd get dressed up then switch outfits in the taxi on the way to the gay club#now that they're married/on vacation in a new country they just wear what they want#he already has a glamorous collection of silk dressing gowns but she's the one who drags him out to buy a closet full of evening gowns#he tries to throw his suits out to make closet space and she steals them for her own wardrobe#also i think they should be a fun mixture of supportive and Cattily Judgemental about each other's dating decisions#just for funsies#like when your bestie is making a mess of their love life but you're in no position to lecture them bc youre WORSE#no wait wait wait#FINAL SEASON they both realize they're trans and move abroad permanently--where they each assume the other's legal identity!!!#SERIES FINALE: a joyful double wedding--wherein they lovingly divorce each other#and (under their switched identities) legally marry their longterm partners
25K notes
·
View notes
Text
should i follow him on insta or wait 2-3 days...
#wildesqdreams#like he's very cute#very very attractive#and he's insto music!!#rock#metal#well i'm more of a pop gurly but nevermind#and he looks very nice#and he's tall#well he is nice#and we like kinda talked today#JUST A LITTLE#but yeahh#though he's a year younger#but oh well#it's not like i want to date him#he just seems cool#so should i?#instagram
1 note
·
View note
Text
you're laughing. beloved network tv show 911's resident single dad with repressed homosexuality is dating three people at once and you're laughing.
#911#911 abc#buddie#eddie diaz#i know it's pointless to make theories about this show now since they've gone full unhinged on abc#but never in my wildest dreams did i see eddie starts dating a shannon lookalike#i don't even want to know the layers of this man's brains i am perfectly fine loving him like this
6K notes
·
View notes
Note
YOU MANIFESTED THE TWEEL CARDS CONGRATS
YOU'RE WELCOME EVERYBODY!
seriously though I was probably like. 60-80% thinking we'd get at least one tweel for chapter 10. but I was NOT expecting it so soon! both of 'em! in August! a shame we're not getting a Coral Sea event after all...but I guess I can be resigned to that and ALSO excited for getting shiny sparkly glowing(!!!!) mertwins along with Azul fighting his inner demons and going right for the eyes! AHHHH I CAN'T WAIT
(also heeeey I recognize that rowboat... 👀)
#art#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 10 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 10 spoilers#omg they're real#hey twst as long as you're pandering directly to me#che'nya card for riddle's chapter??????#it's not going to happen. but. WHAT IF#anyway i suppose they could get this one out a bit faster since the tweel sprites already exist#let's hope for a non-ob octozul cameo too! 🤞#as much as i want to see him though i do think it would be extremely funny if his dream were just#everything's the same in the coral sea except he's in human form the entire time#no real reason he just feels like it#chapter 10 though! the hype!#floyd is one of the characters i can't even begin to imagine what his dream might be#(the other one is ace) (i got a couple theories for him but floyd i just have NO idea)#i know it might just be for the diptych but i am VERY intrigued by the implication that the twins might be having the same dream#they're both dreaming about the time they teamed up to ruin some couple's cute rowboat date#and you know what. i believe it.
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
In the world of heavy metals, love is denser than hate!
#Poorly drawn SVSSS#SVSSS#luo bingge#luo binghe#ask#Is that right? Two different character tags? I think that is right.#I'm calling myself out with screenshotting the asks with the dates because my full ask box has become a problem I'm determined to solve.#I promise you that if I did not respond to your ask it was because I 1) *really* wanted to hold on to it to make a doodle reply#or 2) really was so touched by the message and got overwhelmed#So expect many year + old asks suddenly gaining a reappearance! I'm going to get to them ALL.#Back to Luo Binghe (both versions). You see...the substance he is made with has a chemical reaction to affection.#Like how a pokemon has multiple paths to evolution depending on it's friendship points or exposure to random stones#so to does he evolve into various forms. I feel like Bingge (Ht) would be a noble gas. Unable to form bonds#I could also see him as a Halogen-type of element! Highly reactive and only truly found in manufactured environments.#And Binghe (Lv) would be an alkaline earth metal (+2). Sturdy. Forms bond better but not freely giving them away.#this is the second time I've related characters to elements - and I am far less familar with Scum Villian so please feel free to chime in.#I could be way off base here and I am very down for someone to talk chemistry and character themes.#Thank you all for the love you have given my silly little LBH. It means a lot to me B*)#Don't...don't look too hard at the lack of mark on his forehead here. I gave up. It's just...hidden behind his bangs.
948 notes
·
View notes
Text
Older Sylus as actual dad 😭👌✨
#u can't tell me he doesn't sound like divorced dad who tried his best to reconnect with his daughter & care her on her cramp clumsily#love and deepspace#at least it is until the part he started the massage; tbh only after i think of him as a dad that his charm point increases for me#i just feel the whole thing with sylus is weird like it is kinda forced that he is overly affectionate as the bad guy#love and deepspace fanart#lads fanart#fanart#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace mc#love and deepspace kieran#love and deepspace luke#love and deepspace zayne#sylus#luke#kieran#zayne#lads zayne#lads sylus#lads luke#lads kieran#lads mc#i want him olderr damnit!!! make him actual mafia father#fshdh the way he made small talk about the blanket was so dad#and the way he clumsily talk about the sugar is so dad#what the hellll HE is SooooOOooo daaaddd..........#plsss adoopt my MC and stop being flirty with me (impossible)#sorry guys i don't want to date sylus i want older him to become mc's adoptive dad dot png
915 notes
·
View notes
Text
Prompt 102
Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath. In for ten seconds, out for eight. Alright. Okay. “Let me get this straight,” he didn’t motion to the three teens- or not teens even if two apparently looked like they were- but it was a close thing. “You-”
Phantom perked up, white hair flickering with what he was pretty sure were stars as they turned away from the window looking out into space. “-are two years old.” The fae-esque being who looked more like a fourteen year old gave a half-distracted nod. Which, for a toddler, they were paying attention pretty well.
“You-” Klarion looked up from where he was fiddling with the cuffs that had been on him, cat sprawled on his shoulder now that it was out of the carrier. “-are six?” Another distracted nod, the apparently-child seemingly enamored with the sounds the cuffs made when they clinked together.
“And you-” He turned towards Marvel, who shrank back before seemingly steeling themself. “-are in fact ten.” The… well they had thought demigod but apparently all three were some sort of realms-being, which had apparently made Constantine pale and start cursing before stomping out of the Watchtower. Another nod and shaky thumbs up.
Alright. Okay. They had in fact let a ten-year old join the league, which wouldn’t have been so bad if they had known. Especially the fact that apparently Marvel was only half-human, which suddenly explained so much about how he didn’t know so many things about a human life. Which-
“You,” he turned towards Phantom again to make sure he was listening before returning his attention to Marvel. “And you have both lived at least a year in the human realm with human companions, but your-” He turned his gaze towards the ravenette in the center. The six year old apparently. “-experience with the human realm is literally just with the Light.”
Yet another distracted nod. Okay. Bruce was tempted to scream in a room for the entire situation that had cropped up from the single action of taking Klarion’s familiar and then the boy himself into custody. Then again, it was honestly a much better thing they had apparently caught this.
“Alright,” he sighed, suddenly feeling incredibly exhausted. “To make sure I have all of this correct-” Because it was already a shitshow and the amount of shouting had absolutely spooked the child. To the point he’d- according to Marvel- made what was apparently some sort of very distressed noise that had made both him and Phantom running. Or rather flying and portaling.
“-in the realms, people there make friends through fighting,” Bruce pauses to make sure he got that part correct. The origin of this entire misunderstanding with the chaos-lord. Lordling?
All three nodded, Klarion losing interest in the cuffs and starting to pet his cat. Familiar. Everyone had referred to it as a familiar and Marvel had appeared utterly horrified that they had taken said familiar away. Somehow he was the one the trio were currently trusting and weren’t doing the same towards any of the other league members.
“And you have been trying to make friends with the Jr team, which they have been taking as an attack due to this miscommunication.” Honestly they should have gotten more information, though he couldn’t exactly blame any of the teens, what with everything they were currently dealing with.
“... is there any sort of guardian or something you might have, that can be contacted? Or anyone that could help prevent a situation like this from happening again?” All three avoided his eyes, suddenly finding things like the table and walls very interesting.
Oh. Hm. This could be a problem.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#Bruce is so done#Danny: I would have a guardian but the observants locked him up in his clocktower 'cause he used to date the king#Marvel: Does Tawny count?? Like he's a tiger but he also talks and is sapient...#Klarion: Mother Chaos is busy so dropped me off in this world to play#Bruce: Oh no#Bruce already filling out temporary custody papers: Oh No#Bruce: Do any of you know how to do human things#Danny: Oh my human caretakers were mad scientists-#Bruce: OH NO#Marvel: Oh when I'm smaller the street kids help me out#Bruce grabbing a blanket: OH NO#Klarion: I am doing good at being human a completely normal thing to want a good grade in#Bruce already bundling them up: OH NO#They all have familiars lmao#Klarion has Teekl the cat#Danny has Cujo the dog#Billy has Tawny the tiger#JL in the other room having a breakdown or five#Why yes they were fighting a literal child#And yes apparently they did let in another child and literal toddler#Danny: Hold on can I at least get my sister before we go anywhere#Bruce: Hnnnn#His kids are going to laugh at him for bringing home 4 kids
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
"When I was a young man, I fell in love with a woman-"
"Oh, hey, is it that late?"
"Sit."
This is such a funny father and son moment between these two, and I love it way too much.
Not only with Raph trying to get out of hearing a story from his dad that he's not interesting in/in the mood to hear, but also immediately wanting out the second he realizes it's about his dad's love life.
#Rise ain't the only ones who had the turtles not want to hear about their dad's dating history#Raph is like ‘I don’t wanna hear this mushy shit’ *proceeds to be apart of mushy shit with his own gf seasons later*#don't worry Raph you'll understand when you meet a special lizard lady in season 4 ;D#I can imagine Raph's kids doing something similar to him in the future#like Raph starts going on about a story (or how much he loves his wife) and his kids are just not having it lol#TMNT 2012#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt raphael#TMNT raph#tmnt raph 2012#master splinter#tmnt splinter#TMNT season 1#turtle temper
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
pelican town, ‘72
#stardew valley#stardew valley spoilers#sdv#sdv spoilers#grandpa#mister qi#mr. qi#idk how dates work in stardew universe im just bullshittin#i love qi’s huge fucking eyebrows you dont notice them at first but theyre there#(gives our collective grandpa a ponytail) i think he had one. whatever#’why isnt mister qi blue’ my hc is he is blue from long-term iridium supplementation#and was originally just a regular person#but also it’s nice to see ur fav be like a normal human color#if u read tag essays tho consider this:#qi discovers secret to immortality (consuming iridium in a specific manner)#wants to share discovery with his farmer (player’s grandpa) and in that way. they will have all the time in the world to build#a perfect farming/business empire whose legacy will last forever and ever and theyll be 2gether forever#but it turns out. like a lot of normal people would. his farmer does not want to live forever#and obv he doesn’t#in an attempt to try not to ever lose the thing that means more to him than anything else in the world. qi inadvertantly ensures he will#because his farmer is dead. and he’s going to live forever#but. it’s kind of ok. because he has infinite money and was able to figure out how to talk to his dead bf#and now YOU help them fulfill their joint goal of making the farm’s legacy last forever#smile. heart#sobbing
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Prompt:
It’s not that Jason forgot, per se.
But between smuggling a toddler out of the League of Assassins, trekking halfway across the world, and finding a suitable hiding place that’s also child friendly… well, it kind of slipped his mind that he’s supposed to be… dead.
Something that comes back to bite him in the ass when he takes Dami out for some ice cream and just so happens to run into non other than Brucie-fucking-Wayne
#look I’ve found a new fave trope and it’s Brucie Wayne having to keep up his act while internally LOSING HIS SHIT#Jason isn’t very into the whole revenge thing here#his mind is 85 parts ‘keep Dami safe’ 5 parts ‘kill joker asap’ and 10 parts ‘avoid bats at any cost’#Jason doesn’t know who Damian’s father is#dealer’s choice if Jason establishes himself as Dami’s dad or older brother#his build certainly makes him look old enough#if you don’t look at his baby face lol#Jason runs into Brucie and goes straight into survival mode#Damian who is very observant for a toddler immediately clocks Brucie as THREAT based on Jason’s reaction#Brucie blue screens and desperately tries not to lose Jason in the crowd#jason is absolutely trying to lose Brucie in the crowd#while clutching Damian like his life depends on it#for all he knows it does#the visceral terror that your pseudo dad will take away your little brother/baby#Bruce who just wants to know if he’s hallucinating again: W A I T#jason who is terrified of being put in Arkham for killing people: no FUCKING WAY#hm maybe Jason plays the ‘I’m not Jason’ game again#it’s not gonna hold for long#but Bruce absolutely thinks that Damian is Jason’s bio child for a while and he’s on the WARPATH#Jason was sixteen when he died and never showed any interest in dating so literally every red flag is waving in brucie’s mind simultaneousl#or maybe Jason manages to get away and all Brucie is left with is the memory of his supposedly dead son#running away from him#and clutching a tiny kid#prompts#jason todd#batfamily#Damian wayne#batdad#brucie wayne
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Pray for Gongyi Xiao 😔
[ID: A Scum Villain Comic. All characters are depicted in a chibi style. The first image depicts QJ!Disiciple Gongyi Xiao with a finger pointed up to his chin and a slightly nervous expression saying, "Ning-Shijie, I don't think Luo-Shixiong likes me very much..." with a thought bubble next to him showing Luo Binghe with an arm around Shen Qingqiu giving a glare behind him, presumably towards GYX. The next image depicts Ning Yingying with her hand raised to gesture, replying "Don't worry! A-Luo is just a little...protective. You'll be fine as long as you're not in love with Shizun!" It cuts back to GYX who has now clasped his hands together looking towards NYY with a heavily flushed and nervous expression, simply going "...". NYY looks back with her hand now clutched into a fist, an equally nervous expression responding "oh no", a thought bubble behind her depicts a mini version of her hands raised and eyes closed in anguish saying "A-Luo's gonna kill him..." End ID]
#dw lbh wouldnt actually kill him it would make shizun sad#svsss#scum villain#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#gongyi xiao#ning yingying#bingqiu#mxtx#qj!gyx au#myart#compared to mf i think nyy is like 'of course shizun has a bunch of people wanting to date him hes great :D'#but she also knows that anyone who does have a crush on him is immediately on a-luo's shitlist lmao#svsss au
764 notes
·
View notes
Text
pookie is pensive. 🥺🖤 Ω
i love him so much.
#my art#omega ghoul#the band ghost#nameless ghouls#omega#meliora#ghouls#demons#ghost band#ghost fanart#digital art#he is everything#can you tell he's my favorite ghoul#goddd#look at those strong arms that soft tummy ok#an aroace can dream even i would never date irl#let me be carnal for omega#terzo i understand#yknow what i want him to be my bff#i want a friend like omega
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
hehe ghost-turbo haunting felix au
turbo is connected to the last piece of his code in the whole arcade - a trophy he gifted to felix in mid 80s as a symbol of him genuinely caring about their relationships on par with being the best racer. felix also gave him one of his medals and both kept their gifts next to other rewards, but when roadblasters and turbotime were unplugged, the medal was gone with everything else
now, after burning in cola-lava turbo is basically dead, but scraps of his code still were intertwined with the trophy (after all, it was his first winner's cup, but felix never knew about it), giving turbo an opportunity to exist as a shadow incapable of interacting with anything and anyone besides felix, who kept the trophy even after the roadblasters incident
also I went crazy in tags, feel free to check them out
#turbo#turbotastic#fix it felix jr#80s boyfriends#hammertastic#headcanon about them exchanging their trophies isn't mine but i loved it A LOT#and “darling” is turbo making fun of how felix was calling him in 80s#this hc about “doll” and “darling” pet names also is not mine but i adore it#turbo here is a complete freak who just stays around felix most of the time even when felix has moments with calhoun#and felix is an ass who keeps secrets from everyone bc he doesn't want his dirt to come out#he's ashamed of his previous relationship with turbo and doesn't want anyone to know any details#and calhoun to just know about it#this just gets worse and worse#they also didn't actually break up and were still technically dating when turbo went gamejumping#and he's mad af at felix because he's the reason ppl in the acrade made a boogeyman out of turbo and he couldn't come back#like imagine your bf says to you what you are better than others think of you#and then behind your (presumably dead) back tells everyone that you're just an egocentric maniac#i believe turbo has other reasons why he gamejumped (besides jealousy which took place but wasn't the most important reason)#and felix is an unreliable narrator#so yeah turbo HATES his ass#(but still would-) no im not making it suggestive#anyway i hc that turbo had put A LOT of emotions in this relationship even tho he's bad at this#he tried his best with felix but they were just making each other worse#and turbo while feeling betrayed never really moved on (yes even after 25 years he's PATHETIC)#and felix is just full of regret about everything but he won't admit his mistakes in his relationship with turbo#bc “well he turned out to be a bad person so that automatically makes me in the right about everything”#but felix had made a lot of bad decisions while dating turbo and was just classically ignorant about a ton of things#sorry about this random ass essay in tags i'm done for now#wreck it ralph#wir
751 notes
·
View notes
Text
Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#toshiro nakamoto#chilchuck tims#kabru#BF in this context could be boyfriend or best friend. The line is so blurry.#Chilchuck less so but whatever is going on between Shuro and Laios & Kabru and Laios is giving strong:#“dude if you were a girl I'd date the hell out of you”. And from the genderswap extra's that sentiment is canon for BOTH.#This was made prior to the translation of the Laios & Kabru & Shuro restaurant date comic and honestly I am just feeling vindicated.#I don't even know what to call this dynamic other than a situationship. There is so much going on between all of them.#Even on a purely platonic reading - the miscommunication and male yearning for friendship hurt so bad.#When we got the Big Hug scene in the epilogue arc I was whooping and hollering! Pure catharsis moment!#I also don't like hugs very much so I really felt it went Shuro ('hates being touched') went in for the bear hug.#Do not get me started on the agony of 'always lying' Kabru telling the truth (I just wanted to be friends)#and 'always believes' Laios thinking it's another lie and brushing him off.#I am once again supporting dungeon meshi day by posting art. Please watch dungeon meshi.#obligatory edit because I’m tired: YES. Chilchuck cares for Laios and him admitting it was a huge part of his arc#YES he is more just fed up with him that actually hating him.#I needed a third guy to be canonically done with his ass for the THREE WEED SMOKING GIRLFRIENDS reference
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
⚜️wear the hat, ride the cowboy⚜️
This one has a nsfw ver. too! The link to it is on my Twitter!
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obm#mammon obey me#obey me mammon#obey me fanart#mammon#obm mammon#i fucking love him GRAAHHHH#I just kept adding more and more things to him#like half the details here were thought of plus added while making it#I want him in a way that’s so crazy and so strong that the world would shatter if I tried to tell you#I’m chewing on my cellular while looking at him#fuucckkkkkk he’s perfect
3K notes
·
View notes