#it's not her blandness that's offensive (to me)

[notdefendingtaylor]

hot take thursday

if swifties weren't an unpaid pr firm for taylor and music 'journalists' weren't a paid pr firm for her and the nfl wasn't a quid pro quo pr firm for her

i don't think there would be any anti tag activity

[nyaskitten]

New Ninjago Markets Minifigure Leak (I think)

I'm not too sure who she is or why tf she's an archer, but I'm under the assumption that she comes in the Ninjago City Markets set (because I REALLY don't want ms. generic-girl-face number 100 to be Sora or smth)

She also apparently works at NGTV News so like, who knows, maybe we could also be getting Vinny Ninjago from the hit television series Lego Ninjago?

[suguru-getos]

Kid Gojo goes to Kid!Fem-Reader's House

This is a part II to a drabble I wrote, Part I.

Satoru's footsteps matched hers, trailing towards an unknown path leading to a normal-looking house. It was beautiful though, bright colours, gardens had flower beds of roses, tulips, a ceramic pot with fresh water for the birds. Homely, the house looked and felt what the Gojo estate never did. For a ten year old, who wasn't accustomed to this new found feeling, Satoru didn't know what to say, how to react. He hums, "small, your house is small." kicking a piece of gravel from the pavement.

She was on her tippy-toes, reaching for the door-bell and ringing it. "Mean." She pouted, looking at Satoru with a disgusted face. Like he has shit his pants and she can smell it kind of disgusted.

"What is that face?" He fumbles, taken aback, eyes siren in offense. She shrugged, sticking her tongue out, "I make this face at meanie poopy people." She crossed her arms, always works. No matter who it is.

The faint echoes of footsteps carry from farther away in the kitchen to the hallway, becoming clearer as the door opens. "Oh hello Y/N! Welcome home sweetheart!" Her mother beams, bright and joyful. Her eyes scan the little kid next to her, from his clothes he definitely did not look homeless. Beautiful, all-knowing, almost frightening eyes. "Oh? You made a new friend?" Her mother inquires, looking at Satoru. Now, Satoru Gojo was used to people bending backwards for him, this bland reaction was refreshing.

"My name is Satoru Gojo." He hums, "She dragged me here." He scoffs. Of course not, but the heir of the Gojo clan can't look eager for some cookies?

"She did? Oh my" Her mother gasped a little, knowing the kid was just behaving of his age. "I just wanted him to taste your cookies mama, he protected my favourite water bottle tumbler from the poopie kids!" She grins, walking inside. For a moment, Satoru looks hesitant. What is he even doing, he has roles and responsibilities. Cookie-tasting is definitely not one of them. He can have cookies from any part of the world, Paris? Even London's bakeries- why even-

His trance is broken the moment his wrist is grabbed by her, cheerful eyes beaming and dragging him inside. The moment Satoru's footsteps get inside, and the delicious scent of cookie dough fills his nostrils, he decides to stay. Cookies are important. He could get cookies from anywhere but these are the best ones, yes. The girl herself, said so.

"Come sit," Her mother coos, "Satoru kun, Y/N." She hums, getting them both a chair in the dining table.

Satoru's eyes linger around, the house is cute, not too vast. The distance between him and Y/N is also minimal, because the dining table is not so big. It's perfect actually. He grins, he feels happy, the spacing makes him feel included.

"So? What is your job?" Satoru asked, crossing his arms, looking at the girl.

"My job? I dunno- mama's daughter? Though when I play Police with my friends I am never the thief!" She grins. Satoru is… jealous. Satoru is… enamoured.

"No like, okay leave it- what is your dream?" He asks again, surely there can be some similarity where he can link his life to hers.

"I am gonna be an Astronaut!" She grins wide, "Gonna see the pretty moon, the pretty stars!"

Satoru Gojo pouts, he's ten, and his birth shackled him to one role. He wants to be a sorcerer because he doesn't know any other thing. He thought being a sorcerer was his decision, training was his decision. An eerie bewilderment presses his soul, hollowing it like a cavity. Why couldn't he think about becoming someone like an Astronaut?

"When you come here next time- we should play together." Y/N hums, feet shaking in boredom.

Next time… why would there be a next time? Her mother comes in the room, freshly baked cookies with a glass of milk, a slice of the cake she just made.

"Oh drooling!" Y/N whines, watching her mom place them on the table.

Satoru acts, sophisticated, there is no way some cookies would make him say that, he's not a dog! But they smell so good- NO WAY!

Y/N quickly takes the first bite, happy shakes and wiggles follow with whines. "Oh my god mama this is the best!" Satoru looks flustered, hesitantly taking a bite as well. The flavours melt in his mouth, it was perfect. Wow… "This is good." He announces, watching her mother grin and leave the two alone. He gets headpats, Y/N gets headpats. Satoru doesn't get headpats, the flustered expression on his face is evidence enough.

"Y-you were saying?" He asked, taking another bite.

"Oh yeah! I was saying, when you c'mere next time, we should play House." "House?" What is that game?

"Like, house? Or we could play Police too…" She grins, so excited, so thoughtless.

"I don't play kid's games. I am ten years old." Satoru scoffed.

"Aw- okay." She looked down, taking another bite, interest and excitement killed. Satoru's eyes glare at her, stop doing that! "Maybe just once." Satoru Gojo was kind, he knew he was… just didn't want to show it to others especially in a scathing world like the Jujutsu community where he is worshipped. "Okay! Let's play House then!" She grins, perking right back up.

Ten year old Satoru Gojo had already promised a second meet to play House. Is this how you make friends, he wonders…

[dangermousie]

2024 list - cdrama edition

Yes, it's cdrama world so even though December is halfway though, they may drop 10 more dramas I will check out between now and 2025. But if I wait, this will never get done and it can always be updated, so here we go. This has been one of the best cdrama years for me!

This is only going to cover cdramas that aired in 2024; if I watched it but it was made in a different year, it’s not on the list. As always, very subjective.

DRAMAS WATCHED

(In order of liking from least to most as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list)

61 My Divine Emissary - it’s actually a pretty good drama year when the worst cdrama I’ve checked out this year is merely utterly shrill and brain dead but not horrifyingly offensive to good taste.

60 Are You the One - no you are not. There are objectively worse dramas I've ranked higher but this is here because I am annoyed at the waste of Zhang Wanyi and this drama's popularity and douban rating. I am a petty bitch.

59 Fight for Love - they had wonderful actors and a great premise and utterly wasted it. There might someday be a good drama about a female general torn between a royal and an enemy general but this ain’t it.

58 Peacock in Wonderland - I am a few decades too old for this brain dead fest but I am glad Zhou Jun Wei is not canceled at least.

57 Her Fantastic Adventures - honestly, this, MDE and Revenger are all the same type of subgenre - they aren’t offensive they are just as empty as air. This also suffers from casting an utter dud as ML and a charisma boat as SML. Why?

56 Lady Revenger Returns from the Fire - the main thing I remember from this is that Miles Wei must have stolen the wig maker’s parking spot. That wig is the one that should have gone into the fire.

55 Fox Matchmaker: The Red Moon Pact - it’s so pretty, so full of gorgeous costumes and actors and I enjoyed the first few eps, but ultimately it was like watching colorful paint dry. It was so dull, I couldn’t even hate watch it, and that is more damning than anything.

54 Your Trap/Imprisoned Love - the plot of this mini made no sense but the softcore vibes of sanitized 1990s cinemax were on point!

53 The Unexpected Marriage - cutesy dumb period romcom. Could be worse, not that this is much of a praise.

52 Love’s Rebellion - so twee, so precious, so full of cutesy awful CGI and actors who aren’t bothering. I am not sure why Zhang Linghe and Jing Tian are in this mess that looks like rainbow vomited on a xianxia set.

51 My Wife’s Double Life - her life may be double but her brain is only half.

50 Jade’s Fateful Love - I lost some braincells trying this one, but (a) it’s gorgeous and (b) no transmigration say you? Multiple transmigration in first ep alone! Good for you, makers!

49 Follow My Heart - how do you have Luo Yunxi, Song Yi and Cheng Lei and waste them so utterly? First few eps were nice and then it’s like exercise in how much you can tolerate before you call it quits.

48 The Story of Pearl Girl - almost made me dislike ZLS and LYN and that's a feat. Dull and stupid and pointless from beginning to end.

47 Brocade Odyssey - more like Snooze Novella.

46 Melody of Golden Age - see write up for FMH because it fits here. This is bland with a side of bland.

45 The Legend of Taotie - an unequivocally bad drama but the look is such a nostalgia trip and I had fun.

44 Sword and Fairy 4 - it’s kinda a mess but I loved the actors and some of the plots and you can do worse.

43 Dawn Amidst Hidden Clouds - I enjoy watching Chang Huasen as a ML but the rest is eminently forgettable.

42 Blossoms in Adversity - dumb as a set of particularly dumb bricks and ML I don’t think could act if his life depended on it, but it was strangely addictive and I watched it often before better dramas. It’s just a genuinely good time somehow!

41 Judge Dee - it’s not you it’s me in action. It’s smart and gorgeous and well acted, I just don’t do procedurals.

40 The Substitute Princess’ Love - it’s like some of those trashy web novels I enjoy. It was clearly cut, its budget was equivalent to loose change found in the pockets of makers of Fox Spirit Matchmaker, but it was a surprisingly fun watch, though I enjoyed the first half better than the second. Also as a drama old, it was a fun blast from the past seeing Dylan Kuo (if you have never watched the old twdrama The Outsiders, what are you even doing with your life?)

39 Rise from the Ashes - a wacky as hell mini where reborn FL wreaks revenge with help of her fake uncle as they carry on as some sort of Borgia/Phillip II of Spain fame hybrid. If you don’t need to use your brain, you could have a worse time.

38 The Legend of Heroes - it suffered from me seeing other versions of this tale before that I liked more and not loving how dark looking it is but that cast is A+ and Wang Hongyi was a revelation as Yang Kang.

37 Beauty Strategy - a mini of what a few years ago would have been a proper angsty drama of palace scheming enemies while lovers, powerless emperor etc etc. Honestly, I loved it.

36 Lovesickness - this year’s gender-reversed Ancient Love Song, not as artistic or good but still a good time about a woman traveling back in time and falling for a powerful but doomed duke.

35 Fragments of Kylin - demon slayer falls for a demon; this one came out of nowhere and didn’t have much of a budget but is surprisingly lovely.

34 Love of Nirvana - the good parts are vvvvv good and points for making the emperor the villain, but it almost never emotionally grabbed me, and a lot of time was spent on narratives I had no interest in.

33 Enslaved by Love - the only reason it’s not the most fucked up drama on this list is because Shadow Sect, Palace Shadows and Burning Flames exist. The ML is toxic enough to be banned by the Geneva convention but FL does get some of her own back and also if you ever wanted to see blindness-curing sex, boy do I have a drama for you!

32 The Princess Royal/The Grand Princess - I am in the minority of finding this drama very mid. The acting was fine (except for former eunuch dude), the writing was fine, but I never really got invested alas. I don’t even know why. I think it’s just not my type of narrative; there was no intensity.

31 Secrets of the Shadow Sect - head of sect lady and her very very subby bodyguard. What’s not to love?

30 Palace Shadows: Between Two Princes - ML pretends to be his own twin, bdsm and sluttiness ensues. I cannot even explain how wild this drama is but the acting is on point and way way fun!

29 Dashing Youth - I had no expectations of this drama (was either indifferent to or disliked everyone in the cast, wuxia and wuxia-adjacent is rarely my genre, the number of characters is huge) but I loved how under its bright colors, it eventually gets very dark (it’s quite old school that way) and somehow I am invested in everyone in the huge cast. This being a prequel to The Blood of Youth makes us know the fates of many of the characters and this adds the air of tragic inevitability to it all.)

28 The Last Immortal - a surprisingly sweet and touching xianxia that works largely because Zhao Lusi and Wang Anyu are so so so so solid separately and together.

27 Burning Flames - the most gonzo drama on this list. I love it for committing to insanity as it should (if you pick insane source material, commit.) Humans taking on the worst Gods since Olympus, fur and chains, sentient crystal FL, ML who goes from Crown Prince to mine slave to rebel leader, bare chests and fur, demon elves, a villain that leaches color from the world - this drama has everything and I loved its unhinged glory.

26 Lost You Forever 2 - it would have been higher except it fell apart in the last third so badly I am still wondering how the makers could misunderstand their own characters and their own narratives so badly. The first season was a masterpiece. This is a hot mess.

25 Fateful Love - this was released after years in the dungeon and feels old school in the best way. It's what reading one of those OP FL web novels feels like, and the OTP is shockingly competent and adult. I loved that.

24 Love Game In Eastern Fantasy - excellent start, mid middle, and a terrible last third but I cannot have truly hard feelings since before it fell off, it really was fun.

23 Love in a Dream - it's a mini that has the most gorgeous cinematography I've seen all year except for Fangs of Fortune and Eternal Brotherhood. I loved the vibes and the story (though of course it suffered from mini running time constraints) and its feeling of tragic love and lost time.

22 Different Princess - a ridiculous amount of fun and ship about an author falling through to her own novel and falling for the villain.

21 Kill Me Love Me - the story is a mess and a half but the OTP gave me some incredible incredible scenes, and Wu Jinyan, Liu Xueyi and Baron Chen are gorgeous and acting their hearts out, plus the whump mmmm.

20 Meet You at the Blossom - this is a Thai/Taiwan/China coproduction so I am including it. It's my list! An uncensored BL adaptation with delicious dysfunction, sunshine x murder boy, angst, shippiness, groveling and wigs that are surprisingly decent for the budget!

19 Sword and Fairy 6 - I love this tale; the young OTP (a whale weapon and a clone of her trigger? More wholesome than you think) who are so ride or die for each other, the other amazing characters (sect leader who has to live as a man and her “twin” who is an ancient trapped spirit, a wolf demon, etc…) It’s just genuinely good and proof that targeted to younger audience doesn’t have to be bad.

18 In Blossom - sure, we all know JJY can’t act, but the narrative was so fun and the visuals were so gorgeous and Liu Xueyi so gorgeous and magnetic in his first proper Male Lead role, it was all worth it. I liked the first half when they were still cautious of each other more than the second but this is just a good time!

17 Snowy Night Timeless Love - a classic, tragic, romantic wuxia the way "they don't make it any more" only they did. Just lovely.

16 The Rise of Ning - such a pleasant, easy slice of period life with a side of revenge and fakecest (but only a teeny side.) Secondary characters are not particularly engaging and the plot suffers from being limited to 40 eps, but the main OTP is so enjoyable and Ren Min and Zhang Wanyi are doing such nuanced, lovely job that I can't even complain.

15 Hard to Find - my second favorite mini on the list, this is an aesthetic feast. The doomed couple from enemy kingdoms, the vengeance, the twists - if ever a mini deserved to be a proper drama, this would be it. But alas, if it was they’d probably not let it.

14 The Double - unhinged web novel vibe done so perfectly in the inimitable Yu Zheng style. The leads were so good even the amazing villains didn’t truly steal the show. Like with a lot of cdramas, it lost a lot of steam in second half for me, but still a great watch.

13 Strange Tales of Tang Dynasty 2 - I never like procedurals. Somehow both seasons of this show are the sole exception. It is so gorgeous, so impeccably acted, with such great characters. I cannot wait for s3.

12 Love in the Desert - a mini drama in story but with a proper budget and run time, this is such gorgeous sensual fun with a great main OTP, a truly incredible secondary OTP and some beautiful visuals.

11 Fortune Writer - the best mini this year and better than most “proper” cdramas (Douban raters agree), this tale of villains in love fighting the narrative has a lot to say about writing cliches and writing conventions. I love how clever it is and how it actually made me care for the characters.

10 Tender Light - except for that ending, this was in the running for my favorite 2024 cdrama. The writers’ lack of ability to commit and carry through pushed it lower but otherwise it’s a genuine masterpiece. The acting, the chemistry, the looping narrative, what it has to say about abuse and complicity of society and blazing your own moral path is something else.

9 Derailment - who knew a little quasi scifi modern would be this high but this one is amazing. If you watch one modern this year, make it this one. Our FL is a rich girl a little in the future who somehow wakes up in a different timeline a few years back in the body of that universe’s version of her (who is poor and has been missing) and her one connection is a young man who was in love with that universe’s version of her. I don’t want to say more so as not to spoil because the twists are twisty but this is EVERYTHING and also addresses transmigration, what it means to love, what is ethical etc etc. And that OTP!

8 Will Love in Spring - this is a year of miracles because I don't just have one modern among my favorites, I have a bunch. This is a gorgeous story about love and healing and awkward, scarred emotionally and physically people feeling if their odd angles and prickly flaws actually fit and working towards a future with fits and starts and it's just so chemistry driven, so tender, so gorgeous.

7 Snowfall - a fever dream of a vampire narrative set in an alternate universe of the Republican era, it’s gorgeous, passionate, hella queer and just like watching the most amazing fanfic come to life.

6 Heroes - a complete masterpiece about three men about to be on the scrapheap of history in the Qing Dynasty about to fall (a constable devoted to obsolete norms, who spent his whole life studying for the imperial exam which got canceled, the world’s best swordsman in the era of guns, and a former imperial guard who emerges from prison into a different world) whose stories intersect as they search for treasure and the women and other people in their lives. This is smart, impeccably acted, filmed in a stunning way, bleak and funny at once and - I don’t use the term masterpiece often but I will use it here.

4 (tie) Blossom - a romantic fever dream, with gorgeous damaged destined lovers. The director is the person who made A Familiar Stranger and Butterflied Lover into amazingness on a short run time and no budget, so when he actually has a proper run time and a budget - oh boy - it's romantic and beautiful and intense, a drama as opera.

4 (tie) The Legend of Shen Li - I am often indifferent to xianxia that suffers from too much CGI, hella immaturity and not enough stakes. Shen Li is everything. It’s gorgeously filmed, it’s adult, it gives the story time to breathe and centers it on characters and relationships. And the OTP is everything you can ever dream of - it reunites Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin, totally healing those Princess Agents wounds - their chemistry is still utter fire but the narrative supports them every step of the way.

3 Eternal Brotherhood - if JoL2/FoF did not come out this year, this would be my favorite cdrama of the year. It’s clearly a passion project with a small budget but this complex and grim tale of three rather different sworn brothers in a world at war is gorgeous, smart, well acted, dark and inspiring at once. There are shots that take my breath away, the love stories are amazing, the pace is perfect, and ohhh our complex mainsssssss.

1 (tie) Joy of Life 2 - (almost) nothing can beat this masterpiece. The first season was perfect and somehow the second is even more perfect. It’s smart, it’s funny, it’s heartbreaking, the cast is still impeccable and Zhang Ruoyun still gives a completely jawdropping performance as the focus of all the madness Fan Xian. If you watch only one cdrama this year, make it this one; well, this and Fangs of Fortune.

1 (tie) Fangs of Fortune - this is an emotional and visual feast, with such incredible characters, interesting explorations of fantasy and mortality and morality and what makes life worth living. It made awful actors good and mid actors amazing (and amazing ones extra amazing.) It is also the most stunning drama I've ever watched as well as throwing me back into what it's like to be immersed into an amazing fantasy book as a kid and the characters and the relationships and the themes sing to me. A miracle.

FAVORITE DRAMA

Fangs of Fortune - I have rarely seen a drama that speaks to me so personally, but it is also narratively perfect, emotionally devastating, with impeccable acting, complex characters and visuals that are beyond stunning.

Joy of Life 2 - there is not one second I forwarded, not one unnecessary scene, not one weak link character. It’s a smart, fierce masterpiece.

Eternal Brotherhood is a runner up - it came out of nowhere and owned my whole heart. It’s the sole other cdrama this year where I did not ff a second.

WORST DRAMA

My Divine Emissary may have been the lowest ranked drama on my list but honestly, a drama with a tiny budget and a bunch of nobodies does not deserve to be listed as the Worst. What does? Fox Spirit Matchmaker - a huge budget, fancy stars etc etc and yet it's a completely and utterly unwatchable mess. To make something this thoroughly dull is a genuine feat. I cannot think of a drama that insults its viewer more not just this year but any recent year.

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER

Fan Xian (Zhang Ruoyun), Joy of Life 2 - how could it ever be anyone but smart, irreverent, fierce, broken, idealistic, funny Fan Xian. The man who fights against the horrors of the universe, who remains human while being so larger than life. This character is everything.

Or Zhu Yun (Hou Minghao), an ancient, irreverent, vivid, borken demon who wants to die even as he might finally find a reason to live in Fangs of Fortune.

Runner up: Zhou Luo (Zhang Xincheng), Tender Light - idealistic loner who refuses to compromise his principles even as it would be easier to, even as it destroys his life, ZXC has always been a solid actor but here he is beyond.

Alternatively, Zichuan Xiu (Yang Xuwen), Eternal Brotherhood - only way to describe Xiu is “trauma sunshine.” He’s funny, he’s irrevocably fucked up, he is magnetic and intense and he fights for his hopeless ideals and he breaks and he keeps going.

or Xing Zhi (Lin Gengxin), the lonely ancient god in Shen Li discovering the pleasure of life for the first time in aeons.

or Zhuo Yichen (Fangs of Fortune) - a traumatized idealist who goes through so much hell but retains his heart and his core of steel even as he grows up about complexities of the world and the human heart.

FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER

Shen Li (Zhao Liying), The Legend of Shen Li - so fierce, so certain, so alive. She is a goddess but ZLY made her feel so real.

Runner up: Nan Ya (Tong Yao), Tender Light - an abuse victim who keeps trying to find a way out, she’s strong and damaged and complex and honestly, one of the best performances this year.

Alternatively, Jiang Xiao Yuan (Liu Haocun), Derailment - she makes a character that in other hands would be boring or trite, someone I want to reach through to the screen and protect and love.

Or Mi Lan (Ouyang Nana), Snowfall - a tiny, suicidal, abused, seemingly helpless blind girl who decides she needs to protect a deadly ancient vampire as her reason for living and she is unstoppable, fierce and a force of nature in her goal.

NEEDS TO BE MURDERED

99% of the denizens of the town in Tender Light - selfish every day denizens monstrous because of their very everydayness - they watch abuse and choose to blame the victim and gossip and enjoy the view. I hated them all.

BEST BAD GUY

Li Lun (Fangs of Fortune) - with his glorious mane, equally glorious eventual redemption, and incredibly dramatic attitude to a bad breakup, that was a feast.

The Emperor (Joy of Life 2) - a magnetic monster, smartest and the most ruthless character in any scene - Chen Dao Ming gives an insane performance.

Wang Jia Luo (Heroes) - a revolutionary for conservatism, a young man with brains and ideals who gets destroyed by them, who out-Javerts Javert, his descent into villainy and inability to live in the modern complex world, is one of the most compelling and tragic arcs of the drama.

Shen Yurong (The Double) - both repellent and somehow sympathetic, it takes skill to make me feel for a man who tried to bury his wife alive in ep 1. The performance of the whole drama for me.

City Lord (Eternal Brotherhood) - an utterly vile toad of a man, with nothing truly human and yet hiding it under weak and caring facade. I need him taken out.

"HAROLD, THEY ARE LESBIANS" AWARD

Wen Xiao x Pei Sijing, Fangs of Fortune - Duh.

"HOW DID CENSORS NAP THROUGH THIS" AWARD

Vamp Daddy and Loser Li in Snowfall and the entirety of Fangs of Fortune.

MALE LEAD MOST LIKELY TO BE BROUGHT HOME TO MOTHER

No, thank you! The few modern ones she'd not approve of (a mortician with issues? A teenager? A man who had his memories rearranged?) and the period ones are no go since few moms would be keen on wild-eyed, bloodied sons in law however hot and long haired they may be.

FAVORITE SHIP

Dou Zhao x Song Mo, Blossom - one of the most perfectly in sync couples out there, smart, competent, different kinds of damaged, get each other before they love or even trust each other. Your OTP could never. Unless your OTP is them.

Fan Xian x Lin Wan'er, Joy of Life 2 - she is his peace and his haven and the place his busy mind can rest, he is her safety and happiness and ability to live and not exist. They are everything to me.

Shen Li x Xing Zhi, The Legend of Shen Li - the chemistry, the yearning, the slow inevitable collapse into admittance, the way he protects the world and she protects him, the way they dance around each other, her being the aggressor, his surrender to forbidden emotion, their utter mutual belief in each other’s competence. They are everything to me.

Whatever the throuple (with sides?) thing was going on in Fangs of Fortune - I've raved enough about it elsewhere but that was insane in its intensity and gorgeousness and emotion and narrative arcs.

Runner up: the OTP in Derailment - those two went through some mind and soul breaking stuff and made it out.

FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP

Hands down Ruo Wen x Ge Xinwei, Love in the Desert. An amoral, magnetic bandit leader and a princess gone wild on spring break stole the drama utterly. His unhinged energy was so matched by her sfl but with an appropriate target fixation. They made me swoon, laugh and cry.

Amusingly enough, Fu Xin Bo is the male actor in two - the crossdressing sect leader x wolf demon OTP in Sword and Fairy 6, and First Prince x Eldest Princess in Joy of Life 2. What can I say, man knows how to pick them. Those OTPs are both utterly adorable!

If we are talking about an OTP where it’s not that it’s not the main but it’s not a ship-centric drama so they don’t get much time, then we have Si Yilin x Ka Dan, Eternal Brotherhood - they are both such desperately good people in a mad world, tender with each other despite surrounding cruelty and Shen Zhiheng x Mi Lan, Snowfall - a vampire age gap romance done well, the ancient gentleman vampire and the tiny fierce blind girl who decides to protect him.

And of course Qing Geng x Fei, Fangs of Fortune - Ai Mi and Zuo Ye breaking my heart yet AGAIN.

NOTP

The couple in Fox Spirit Matchmaker - such pretty people, and so bland and boring and pointless together. It was kinda amazing.

HOTTEST SCENE

Ka Dan and Si Yilin (Eternal Brotherhood), the primmest, properest OTP of them all, consummate their love without any marriage, but with plenty of golden light.

FAVORITE SCENE

God, so many good scenes this year so far - Fan Xian watching the death of the old censor and the aftermath, in JoL2; his confrontation with Wan'er after she finds out about the truth behind her brother’s death, the scene where he poisons Second Prince, his scene with the registrar. Xiu giving up his future to protect the surrendered soldiers only to come back and find Di Lin executed them all in EB, the scene in Ning’s bedroom when he tells her how he really feels because she can’t hear, the very end of that season and Di Lin striding into the light, Ka Dan and SYL’s letters to each other. XZ literally defying heaven’s lightning and all their longing in Shen Li. The last scene of LYN and his girl in Heroes, the way Heroes always intercuts the golden past of the guard and princess and the dreary present (especially when we see her bicycle spin out of control back when and her husband lose it in the present and this time there is nobody to catch her), the big reveal in Derailment and the hairwashing scene, Mi Lan touching Vamp Daddy’s face as their thing in Snowfall, and the cage stuff, the aborted sex scene in Will Love in Spring, so many scenes in Fangs of Fortune but especially the aftermath on the stairs between ZYC and ZYZ post the latter's loss of control, the final sacrifice,Li Lun x ZYC x ZYZ battle against the bad guy, the whole plague demon storyline, ZYC becoming a demon, ZYZ having to slap himself to nerve himself to walk to his death, everything. And we haven't gotten to it yet, but the scene in all Blossom previews where Song Mo falls to his knees in front of Dou Zhao from a dead run is imprinted in me.

BIGGEST CRUSH

Shen Zhiheng (Gao Weiguang), Snowfall - Vamp Daddy made me hormonal in a way I haven’t felt for a cdrama lead since the heady days of Darren Wang in The Wolf. Those outfits, that hair, that height, that restraint, that lack of restraint. THE CHAINS

BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER

Liu Duan Duan as Second Prince in Joy of Life 2 - what a performance! Unhinged, magnetic, pitiable, terrifying and always mesmerizing. The Second Prince is Fan Xian’s foil and a worthy one. LDD is always a great actor, and with a role that actually gives him something to sink his teeth into - wow!

Runner up - Baron Chen in Kill Me Love Me. It's the year of unhinged royal princes, I guess.

BEST COSTUMES AND WIGS

Fangs of Fortune - the whole design is exquisite!

MOST EXTRA OUTFIT

Burning Flames - this drama was a feat of extraness and that meant costumes but even among those, costumes worn by Peter Ho's human king and Jeremy Tsui's psychotic god stood out.

FAVORITE SECONDARY ML

Wu Shan, Blossom - this man is a literal sunshine angel.

MOST BLATANT INNUENDO MOMENT

The Double - As our FL fondles her wet flower petals in the bath, our ML wields and swings his giant sword shirtless in the rain. That was eye popping.

FAVORITE 2024 CDRAMA SONG

This Chen Xueran song from Eternal Brotherhood:

MVP OF THE YEAR

Liu Xueyi (In Blossom, Kill Me Love Me) - this is the year LXY finally achieved leading man status and he was spectacular in both of his outings - so very different in both but equally magnetic in either even if the dramas themselves had flaws. I have a new fave!

ACTING SURPRISE

Ouyang Nana - Li Muge performs miracles. He made Yang Chaoye be good in Heroes (2022) and now Nana, who was always as wooden as a post, is a revelation as blind abused girl who becomes a vampire in Snowfall.

Hou Minghao - I've always found HMH a stunningly beautiful man and a thoroughly bland actor. But he was surprisingly solid in Dashing Youth and utterly blew me away in Fangs of Fortune. Like jaw on the floor level blown away.

Wang Hongyi - found him bland as paint in LYF (both seasons) but his Yang Kang in Condor Heroes blew me away and then he repeated that feat as a very different character in a very different drama (Snowy Night.) Consider me a new fan.

NEEDS A SEQUEL

Joy of Life 2 of course - I need to see the looming confrontation between Fan Xian and the emperor, though not sure how that will pass censorship.

NEEDS SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

FF button has cured me of finding contenders for this category, but perhaps cutting out a lot of terrible acting and lack of stage presence of “not yet a eunuch” dude in The Princess Royal, would have improved it.

TOO MANY SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT

Lost You Forever 2 - there were other issues with it, but all the cuts couldn’t have helped with coherency.

TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE

Same as last year - the emperor cannot be irredeemable. WTF, China, you are a communist country! Though they are nibbling at the edges this year. Also fake feminism - I am all for girl power but not when it's ridiculously anachronistic for the period with no explanation at all. And finally NO MORE TRADE DRAMAS PLS PLS PLS

FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF

Men (and women) knowingly fighting for a doomed cause because otherwise they’d cease to be who they are. Or if we are being shallow all the beautiful men in chains.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT

Lost Your Forever 2 - the first season was my favorite drama of 2023 but LYF2 just fell apart so so so badly, it was almost fascinating. It totally eviscerated the characters and the meanings of the story.

BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE

So many of top dramas on my list are not dramas that were on my radar at all before airing - Heroes, Eternal Brotherhood, Fangs of Fortune, Will Love in Spring and Snowfall were not anything I anticipated, let alone I realized how much I’d love them. Same for Derailment and Tender Light. This has been a year of surprises.

2024 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH

I have honestly watched everything I wanted.

BEST NON-2024 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2024

Lighter and Princess, hands down. I rarely even enjoy moderns and this one made it into my Top 5 cdrama of all time. This is how you make a love story. This is literally perfect. PERFECT.

Runner up: Strange Tales of Tang Dynasty - I, a procedural and mystery hater (especially when there is close to no romance) somehow fell like a ton of bricks for this gorgeous, smart, impeccably acted show.

MOST ANTICIPATED

A Dream Within a Dream looks like Fortune Writer with proper length and budget, Legend of the Female General looks epic and I love the novel, Divine Tree with Deng Wei is all my fave tropes, Veil of Shadows is peak Guo Jingming, and so many more.

[66kenobi66]

Vivziepop Can't Write POC

TW/CW: Racism, S/A mention

Surprisingly Vivziepop's work actually has more POC characters than I first realized. And all of them are...less then splendid.

Valkyrie

Valkyrie...poor, poor Valkyrie...

Forever cursed to sit in the back, shut up, and only stand up and contribute when her white savior girlfriend either royally screws things up or needs moral support.

I've spoken about my strong feelings on Valkyrie many times before in previous posts so I'll only really give one new shred of criticism I've realized: Making your main POC female cast member a former genocidal murderer who spent supposed years killing her girlfriend's kind is...a choice.

Emily and Sera

My biggest issue with Emily and Sera (especially Emily) is that you can hardly even tell that they're meant to be Black. Their skin is a weird dark grayish brown, their features are stock and bland (both of them lacking proper noses), and their hair is some puzzling mix of straight and poofy.

And the writing of them both is also unimpressive. Emily is a carbon-copy, stock "Bubbly young girl" archetype who never really does much other than sing and move around. She acts more like a piece on a chessboard than a character, simply moving and doing what the scene needs her to do. Sera on the other hand, is a personality-less stick figure who just kind of does things because...the plot requires it. Also, great move Vivzie! Making one of the main villains a Black woman who endorses genocide and has to act like a babysitter/manager to the loud, obnoxious, hate-spewing white guy. How progressive!

Velvette (Kind of?)

I...actually have no real words to say about Velvette. Which sounded like a positive until I realized the reason I had nothing to say about her is because she does nothing. Like, ever.

She just kind of stands around being annoying and ignoring her fellow Vee's whining fits and sex crimes. Jeez, uh...that argument between her and Carmilla was stupid, I guess?

Velvette: She sure is one of the characters of all time!

Valentino

Not even worth mentioning, you already know he's terrible.

Alastor/Husk

Oh dear god, Alastor...

Words fail me at how much of an insane fail both of these characters are. One is a offensive caricature of Voodou that would make Dr. Facilier roll in his grave, who's also somehow whiter than snow despite being half Creloe. And the other is a constantly complaining douche and a hopeless alcoholic, who has a whole song devoted to calling a sex worker a loser for being abused/not having a proper coping mechanism. Oh, AND he's enslaved by the other "Black" guy! HOW PROGRESSIVE 😀

Oh and Carmilla is there too, but I've been awake for too long and also have nothing to say about her :/

[arc-misadventures]

Can we have Jaune and Coco rag on Cinder for her outfit she wears to blend in at Beacon? Its not very good looking.

(Also is it offensive to have Coco do a gay disappointed stare?l

We Need To Talk

Cinder: Alright, we've got our uniforms, now it's time to blend in with the rest of the students.

Mercury: This should be easy enough to do.

Emerald: They'll just see us as any other student.

Neo: (Rolls her eyes as she fellows these three imbecile)

Cinder: Alright, now all we have to do is mingle a little so we don't stand out as a bunch of loners. Let's ming...?

Jaune: ...

Coco: ...

Cinder: Uhhhh... Hi...?

Jaune: You are wearing... a school uniform...?

Cinder: Of course I am. I'm a student of, Haven Academy, so of course I wear their school uniform.

Jaune: ....

Coco: ...

Coco: It doesn't fit her.

Cinder: What?

Jaune: And, yet... it does?

Coco: It's her face.

Jaune: Partly.

Cinder: My face, what's wrong with my face?

Coco: She looks too old to be a student.

Cinder: Old?!

Coco: But still, the school uniform does fit her.

Jaune: In the porn film category?

Mercury: Pfft!

Coco: Yes, that's why it fits so well! She looks like she's the star in a porn film!

Cinder: EXCUSE ME?!

Jaune: But, not the bland crap you'll find in, Atlas: Girl with pigtails being done in by the school jock.

Coco: Of course not! She has too much class for that! She is more like the kind you find in, Mistral. Where she seduces the shy classmate with a massive package, or is seduced by her teacher showing her how much of a daddy complex she has~!

Cinder: A what complex?

Jaune: Or, she's the milf seducing her daughters schoolmate while wearing her old uniform.

Coco: Nice~!

Cinder: W-W-What...?

Mercury: Piftails?

Emerald: Daddy complex?!

Neo: (Silent laughing!)

Jaune: Overall grading?

Coco: Seven out of ten. She looks good in that school uniform, but she doesn't look that good in it. You?

Jaune: Six out of ten. She just looks too old. Like five years to old to be in school.

Coco: Agreed.

Jaune: There you go, six point five out of ten. Congratulations!

Cinder: Thank you...?

Coco: So, lunch?

Jaune: Yes, I am quite famished.

Cinder: W-What just happened?

Yang: Whoa, that was close...

Cinder: Close?

Yang: Yeah, those two are part of, Beacons Fashion Trio. They judge everyone's fashion, and based on their verdict. You can suffer grave consequences based upon your fashion choices.

Emerald: They judge you based on your fashion taste; What do they do, say really mean things?

Mercury: write you a strongly worded letter?

Emerald: Pfff!

CEM: Hahahahaha!

Yang: They water boarded me.

CEM: HAHA-Ha...?!

Emerald: T-They did what?

Yang: They waterboarded me... for wearing fucking crocs.

Cinder: Y-You're kidding me...

Yang: By the gods I wish I was... So you lot better be careful. If you dress unfashionably... You will learn true fear...!

CEMN: ...

Emerald: The fuck is with these people?!

Cinder: Don't worry, I'm certain nothing bad will happen. Afterall we all dress fabulously~!

~~~

Cinder: BERERERE!?! GERGHERGHERH?!!

(Splash)

Cinder: Bwah! (Cough, Cough, Cough!)

Coco: A leather vest, a leather pauldron, grey tight sports pants, high heel shoes, and fingerless bicker gloves... What the fuck were you think that, that was fashionable?!

Cinder: It was just an outfit!

Jaune: It was a crime against fashion!

Coco: And, don't even get me started on the bandages you're using as a bra! Lady, ditch the bandages! There isn't even anything to show!

Cinder: Hey?!

Coco: Why are you even associated with this walking trash bag, Roman? I thought you had better taste then this?!

Cinder: Roman...?

Roman: Hey, she threatened me into working with her! I've been trying to get out of working with her cronies. You think I want to work with this slob!

Cinder: You betrayed me...?

Roman: I may have made a lot of money working for you. But, the threats to my, and Neo's lives..

Neo: (Smiles, and waves~!)

Roman: And, your plans to destroy, Vale have soured my moods to keep working with you. But, your taste in fashion?! That's too far for me missy!

Cinder: What?!

Glynda: She was going to do what? Roman, why didn't you tell me, I would have dealt with her?

Roman: Her fiery red dress was fashionable enough I let it slide, but this! This thing crosses the line!

Glynda: Understandable. Now tell me what it was she was planning, and I'll get you a plea deal, to avoid a lengthy jail sentence.

Roman: Deal!

Cinder: TRAITOR!

Roman: Oh, pish posh. I was never on your side to begin with. The only side I'm on was mine, Neo's, and fashion!

Cinder: When I get out of here, I am going to gut you like a...?!

Roman: Blah blah blah! Dunk her, Neo!

Cinder: Wait no!

(Spash!)

Cinder: BERGERHUR?!! DURGEHEREDEREDGUR?!!! BUDERDGHER?!

Glynda: She's holding her under rather violently...

Roman: Bitch melted her ice cream.

Glynda: A true monster...

[moonselune]

EEE THE INBOX IS OPEN I hope you're at least a lil familiar with dungeon meshi, would you do maybe some headcanons (or whatever works best for you) for your choice of crew with Tav being like Senshi so they're a BOMB ass camp cook and also incredibly resourceful and creative with ingredients and such- no offense to Gale but just like, if Faerun has a similar culinary scene to England like most high fantasy does and then camping on top? then... ya know... euh... BUT IF NOT THEN NO WORRIES- I LOVE YOUR WORK ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I unfortunately have no idea about dungeon meshi but i completely get the concept. Gonna do it for the boyssssss

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Gale:

Camp was calm, the fire crackling merrily as the group gathered after a long day of adventuring. You had long endured Gale's enthusiastic—but consistently mediocre—attempts at camp cooking. His confidence was unshakable, even in the face of countless charred, bland, or overly experimental meals that left the group quietly swapping snacks after dinner. Gale meant well, and his ego swelled with every polite nod or forced smile after a meal. But tonight, enough was enough.

As Gale hovered over his latest attempt—a watery, over-salted stew with floating lumps of... something—you decided it was time.

"Move over, Gale," you said firmly, stepping beside him with a cooking knife in hand.

He looked up, affronted but amused. "I beg your pardon? Move over? I’m creating an artisanal experience here."

"Artisanal isn’t the word I’d use," you muttered under your breath, then louder, "Look, you’ve done well, but it’s time someone with a bit more culinary experience took charge."

Gale froze, his spoon poised dramatically mid-stir. "Oh? And you believe you’re more skilled than I? A Wizard of Waterdeep? An acclaimed intellectual?" He set the spoon down with exaggerated care, crossing his arms. "Do elaborate."

"I’ve kept quiet long enough," you shot back. "But if I have to eat one more overcooked slab of boar or mystery stew, I’ll lose it. Just let me take over."

Gale smirked, clearly intrigued and slightly offended. "If you think you can do better, darling, the fire is yours. Impress me."

The group, now invested, watched with keen interest as you strode confidently into the supply tent. You emerged moments later with an assortment of herbs, spices, and preserved ingredients you had personally gathered and prepared over the course of your travels. Gale, feigning disinterest, lounged by the fire, but his eyes were glued to your every move.

First, you prepared a base for a savory stew with precision, chopping fresh vegetables, seasoning with a deft hand, and even adding a splash of wine that Gale had claimed for magical rituals. The aromas began to waft through the air, causing Shadowheart to wander closer, feigning an excuse to refill her waterskin. Astarion sniffed the air dramatically, muttering, "Finally, someone in this camp who doesn’t treat food as an afterthought."

Gale’s smirk wavered as you added a homemade spice mix, explaining to the group the balance of flavors—earthy, sweet, and smoky.

"It’s all about layering," you said, casting a sly glance at Gale. "You don’t throw everything in at once and hope for the best."

"I would call that an oversimplification," Gale countered, sitting up straighter.

When dinner was finally served, the group fell into a stunned silence as they took their first bites. Scratch barked happily as he devoured his own share, and even Lae’zel—typically indifferent to culinary flair—muttered, “Efficient and pleasing. Acceptable.”

Gale took a tentative bite, his expression shifting from cautious to betrayed. "Well, it’s not... bad," he admitted grudgingly, but the twinkle in his eye gave him away.

"Not bad?" Karlach guffawed. "It’s leagues better than the watery shoe-leather you call dinner!"

Gale huffed, folding his arms. "Well, clearly, you’ve had more... practice."

"Oh, stop pouting," you teased, reaching out to pinch his cheek. His indignant yelp only made you laugh harder. "You’re still my brilliant wizard, just not my brilliant chef."

He tried to maintain his grumpy façade, but as you leaned in and kissed him lightly, the corners of his mouth twitched upward. "I suppose I’ll allow this arrangement... for the good of the group."

"Magnanimous of you," you said, laughing, as you handed him another bowl. "Now eat up, Gale. Even a Wizard of Waterdeep needs sustenance."

From then on, camp dinners were a delight, the group often offering to hunt and gather for your concoctions. Gale, in his own way, found new joy in watching you command the firepit and create meals that brought smiles to everyone’s faces. And though he pretended otherwise, you caught him sneaking second helpings of your food more often than not.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Astarion:

The campfire crackled softly as the evening wind danced through the surrounding trees. Dinner preparation was in full swing, with you at the helm. Your skill in the kitchen—or, rather, your campfire culinary prowess—had become legendary among the party. Tonight, though, your focus wasn’t on the usual hearty stews or roasted game. It was on something far more delicate and tailored for one particular companion who had stolen your heart.

Astarion.

He lounged near the fire, idly flipping through a book with the air of someone completely unaffected by mortal concerns like hunger. But you’d noticed how he sometimes watched the others eat with a wistfulness he’d never admit. Being unable to enjoy food as he once did was just another quiet burden he carried, a reminder of what vampirism had stolen from him.

Tonight, you were determined to change that.

The idea had struck you earlier that day while hunting—a blood sorbet. It was resourceful, creative, and perfectly suited to Astarion’s unique palate. After securing the freshest blood you could (thanks to some carefully collected boar blood and a little bit of your own), you set to work. Using a simple chilled container enchanted by Gale to keep things cool and some foraged ingredients for flavor, you worked on crafting something that might actually please Astarion.

When the sorbet was finally ready, you approached him with an air of nonchalance.

“Astarion,” you said, setting the small wooden bowl in front of him, “I made this for you.”

He raised a skeptical brow, setting down his book. “Darling, while I appreciate your boundless generosity, I’ve told you before—food and I no longer have a pleasant relationship.”

You leaned closer, grinning. “This isn’t just food. It’s blood sorbet. Humor me. One spoonful”

Astarion blinked, his red eyes darting to the dish. It was an unexpected gesture, even for you. Slowly, he took the bowl, sniffing delicately before scooping a small amount onto the provided spoon. The crimson, semi-frozen mixture caught the firelight, glinting like rubies.

He hesitated, then slipped the spoon into his mouth.

His reaction was immediate—a slow blink, followed by a faint furrow of his brows. He removed the spoon, turning it over in his hand as though trying to parse what had just happened.

“Well?” you asked, unable to hide the eagerness in your tone.

“It’s…sweet,” he admitted, his voice laden with reluctant surprise. “And oddly palatable. Not quite as… visceral as I prefer my meals, but… impressive nonetheless.”

You grinned triumphantly. “Told you. I’m a culinary genius.”

Astarion chuckled, shaking his head. “I still prefer it straight from your vein,” he said, his voice dropping into a teasing lilt as his eyes lingered on your neck, “but I suppose I can’t fault your creativity.”

“Maybe next time I’ll make you a blood pâté,” you quipped, leaning in slightly. “Or a nice blood reduction to drizzle over some… I don’t know, undead foie gras?”

He rolled his eyes, though his lips curled into a genuine smile. “You are insufferable. Delightful, but insufferable.”

You smirked. “And you love it.”

Astarion leaned back with a contented sigh, swirling the remaining sorbet with his spoon. “Perhaps I do. Though next time, darling, save yourself the effort and just let me drink directly from you. It’s far less fuss, and I promise to be gentle.”

You flushed, unable to keep from laughing at his unabashed audacity. The rest of the party looked on in various stages of amusement and confusion as Astarion savored your latest creation, the blood sorbet proving to be an unexpected success—and a sweet reminder of the lengths you were willing to go to bring a little joy to his long and hungry existence.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Wyll:

The day had been long and grueling, filled with skirmishes and moments of harrowing danger. Wyll sat by the campfire, his posture slouched, his usual poise dimmed by exhaustion. Gale was busy stirring a pot of something that smelled… fine. But fine wasn’t what Wyll needed right now. Fine wouldn’t fill the gnawing emptiness that came from the taxing day. Wyll didn’t say it, but the look in his eyes spoke volumes: he needed something warm, hearty, and comforting. Something that felt like home.

You caught his expression from where you were tidying up your gear. Quietly, you set your things aside and approached him.

“Rough day?” you asked softly, kneeling down beside him.

He glanced up at you and gave a half-smile. “You could say that. But it’s part of the job, isn’t it?”

You hummed thoughtfully, brushing a hand lightly across his forehead, your touch lingering as you pressed a gentle kiss there. “Give me an hour,” you murmured, your voice as soothing as the promise itself. “I’ll take care of it.”

Wyll blinked at you in surprise but didn’t argue. Your confidence had a way of being infectious. As you left the camp, he leaned back with a puzzled but slightly lighter heart, curiosity mingling with the exhaustion.

Exactly an hour later, you returned, carrying a steaming dish and a goblet of wine you’d swiped from Shadowheart’s stash (you’d deal with her later). The smell wafting from the bowl was intoxicating—savory and rich, with hints of roasted herbs and spices that teased at the memory of home-cooked meals.

“Dinner is served,” you declared, handing the bowl to Wyll with a flourish. The smile that spread across his face was immediate as he accepted the dish.

“You are a lifesaver,” he said, voice filled with gratitude. “No, really—this is why I adore you.”

You laughed lightly, shaking your head. “You haven’t even tried it yet. For all you know, I could’ve put a goblin’s toenail in there.”

“If it smells this good, I’d still eat it,” he replied, already picking up a spoon.

Wyll took his first bite, and you held your breath, watching for his reaction. At first, his expression froze, and your stomach sank. Did he hate it? Did you go too heavy on the spices? Did you accidentally add—?

“Oh gods,” Wyll finally said, his voice trembling as tears welled up in his eyes. “It’s… it’s perfect.”

The spoon clattered back into the bowl as he set it down, his hands moving to rub at his eyes. “I—I don’t even know what to say. Thank you. I didn’t realize how much I needed this.”

A warm smile tugged at your lips, and you reached out to squeeze his shoulder. “You’re welcome, Wyll. You’ve had a hard day. You deserve something to make it a little better.”

“No, seriously,” he said, his voice still thick with emotion. “If I didn’t already love you, this would’ve sealed the deal. You’re incredible.”

You grinned, sitting beside him and nudging him lightly. “Eat up, then. Don’t waste it on tears.”

Wyll chuckled through his sniffles and dug back in, savoring every bite. For the rest of the evening, he didn’t stop singing your praises, his spirits lifted immeasurably by the simple but heartfelt gesture. As far as you were concerned, that alone made the effort worth it.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Halsin:

The sun filtered gently through the canopy of the forest as you set the final touches on the picnic you had promised Halsin. The woven basket sat open on the soft blanket, revealing the bounty you had prepared using the finest ingredients the forest had to offer. Halsin approached, his broad frame moving easily through the woods, and his face lit up at the sight before him.

"This is… remarkable," he said, crouching down to take in the spread. "You truly are full of surprises."

You waved off his compliment with a playful smile. "I promised I’d take care of everything, didn’t I? The forest has so much to offer if you know how to look."

On the blanket sat carefully foraged dishes, each showcasing your resourcefulness and creativity. There was a fresh salad of wild greens and herbs, dressed with a vinaigrette made from wildberries. Accompanying it were roasted mushrooms, their caps stuffed with a savory mixture of nuts and herbs. A loaf of dense, nutty bread you’d baked on a hot stone was paired with a small jar of fresh, hand-churned butter, a sprinkle of dried herbs worked into it for flavor.

Halsin’s grin widened as he inspected it all. "And here I thought this picnic would be simple—perhaps some berries and dried meat. But you’ve created a feast!"

As he settled onto the blanket, you passed him a plate, and he dug in eagerly. The pair of you ate amidst light conversation, the forest’s natural symphony providing the perfect backdrop. Every bite Halsin took was met with a hum of approval, his appreciation only making your heart swell with pride.

Once the main meal was finished, you gave him a conspiratorial grin. "I saved the best for last," you said, reaching into the basket.

From it, you produced a small jar of honey-sweetened custard. It was a delicate dessert, crafted with painstaking care using honey you had collected earlier, blended with creamy milk and infused with a hint of lavender. Halsin’s eyes widened as you handed it to him.

"You know my fondness for honey," he said, voice touched with both surprise and delight.

You chuckled. "I might have paid attention to a few things."

Halsin didn’t waste time. Using the spoon you offered, he took a bite, and the look of bliss that crossed his face was worth every moment you’d spent preparing it. He devoured the dessert quickly, barely pausing to breathe, which left you laughing as you noticed a streak of honey glistening on his cheek.

"Slow down, you’re worse than Scratch," you teased, reaching over to wipe the honey away with your thumb.

Before you could pull your hand back, Halsin caught it gently, his warm eyes fixed on yours.

"You’ve truly outdone yourself," he murmured, his voice low and sincere. "But I think I’m still hungry for something else."

You barely had time to respond before he leaned in, his lips capturing yours in a kiss. It was warm and sweet, tasting faintly of the honey he’d just devoured, and it stole your breath away. When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, a quiet laugh rumbling in his chest.

"You’ve made this day unforgettable," he said softly. "Though I think I may have to insist you let me cook for you next time—if only to match your artistry."

You grinned, your heart fluttering at his words, and nestled closer to him, the remains of the picnic forgotten as you lost yourself in his presence.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Hope this was okay nonnie! And I hope you guys enjoyed this ! Again thank you all for your sweet comments, hopefully will get back to regular posting soon - Seluney xox

If you want to support me in other ways | Help keep this moonmaiden caffeinated x

[webshooterrr9]

Seven Minutes in Heaven with Gojo Satoru

college!gojo x gn!reader (no description of reader's features)

w.c: 1.4k words

content warning: college au, suggestive, they make out, reader is sassy as always, they get interrupted at the end :(

just a little drabble cuz im rewatching jjk

You weren't sure what to expect when the bottle landed on you. Hell, you weren't even sure why you agreed to play this game. The only person you knew at this party was the host, Shoko. She briefed you earlier on some of her friends who'd be attending - including the guy who just spun the bottle - but you weren't really listening. You recognized him, though. There wasn't anyone else here with white hair and a blindfold.

"Guess it's you two," some guy said. "Have fun."

You shrugged and made your way to the empty closet where you'd be spending your 'seven minutes in heaven'... with Gojo Satoru. You had heard of his reputation of being somewhat of a ladykiller, but you'd rather see for yourself.

The two of you sat down on opposite sides of the closet, but it was still cramped. After the door closed, the only light illuminating the shadows was the one peeking from underneath the door. The two of you sat silently for a minute, since you didn't really know each other at all.

"So... you're stuck with me, hm?" he grinned slightly in the dark space. He sat crisscross maybe three feet in front of you.

"I guess." you say, crossing your arms. "You're stuck with me, too."

He chuckled a little. "Yeah, you don't look bad though." His eyes were glued to you, although you couldn't really tell due to his blindfold. Even still, you could feel the weight of his stare - as if he was analyzing you. He uncrosses his long legs, stretching them out to either side of you.

"You're a fucking tower." you comment, keeping a playful tone to try and lighten the awkward mood.

He laughs. "Yeah, I guess so. You ever played this before?"

You shake your head. "Nah, but I know what it's about. It's just a little weird sitting here with a stranger."

Satoru nods understandingly. "Yeah, this game gets a little awkward when you're stuck with someone as stunning as me." he teased.

"Oh fuck off." you laugh, nudging his leg. "You aren't nearly as attractive as you think you are."

He gasps dramatically before letting out a little "hmph!" and pouting. You roll your eyes with a smile. "I mean, you aren't ugly - just don't get cocky. It's not about that."

He regains his smirk. "If it isn't my charming good looks, then what's got you so uncomfortable, hm?"

"I dunno, it's just weird. Being in a cramped closet with someone I barely know isn't exactly my idea of fun. No offense."

"None taken, sweetheart." he leans forward, now only about a foot away from you. "Why'd you even come to this party, then?"

You shrug, "Well, I know Shoko. But other than that, I don't really know anyone here. I only know who you are because she's talked about you."

Satoru's eyebrows raise in curiosity. "Oh?" he tilts his head with a bit of a smirk. "What has she said about me?"

"Nothing special. Just that you're annoying." you watch as he gasps once more, leaning back and feigning offense. His theatrics make you giggle - just a little.

"How rude, you don't even know me! You're not even giving me a chance."

"Do I need to?" you tease, crossing your arms over your chest. "I think your behavior right now says enough."

He huffs and there's a brief pause. You study his face, well, as much as you can in the dark. His outfit is pretty bland other than the fabric partially covering his face. "What's with that blindfold anyway? Can you even see through that thing?"

"Yeah, I can see just fine." he reaches up to adjust it, fidgeting with the cotton a bit as he speaks. "Why? Do you think it looks stupid?"

You shake your head. "No, it looks fine. I just don't see the point. If you're as hot as you think you are, I don't see why you'd want to hide your eyes from people."

"Well not everyone can handle seeing these beauties." he grins, leaning back in to where he was before.

"Yeah? Why don't you take it off, then? Lemme see for myself."

He laughs, accepting the challenge. "How impatient. You just can't wait to see how gorgeous my eyes are, huh?" He slowly lifted his blindfold off of his head with his long, slender fingers. His vibrant blue eyes pierced through yours, even in the dark. They were pretty, sure, but nothing too crazy.

"Cute." you say once you're satisfied with examining his face. "Although I'm still not sure why you wanted to hide them."

As embarrassing as it was to admit, Gojo's heart skipped a few beats when you called him cute. He'd been described by a variety of things before: handsome, hot, sexy, etc. But being called 'cute' was new. He huffed again, disappointed with your underwhelming response to his beautiful face. He shifted a little closer to you, dropping the blindfold beside him. "Just cute? Nothing else?"

The wall behind you stopped you from leaning back, keeping the distance between you two as minimal as possible. "Yeah, just cute." You see him grin slyly, and you raise an eyebrow. "Wanna tell me why you've decided to get so close?"

"Just wanted to get a closer look at you, that's all." His head was tilted as he took in your features again. You just kept getting prettier - and the sass didn't help. He reached out and booped your nose. "You're pretty cute, too."

You boop him back. "Thanks." a small laugh escapes you, leaving behind a smile. You take a glance at your phone. "Only a few minutes left, then we can get out of this closet."

He got all pouty, using his newly-revealed eyes to enhance the effect. "Aw, why do you wanna get out so fast? It was just getting fun."

"Because that's the game, Gojo." you laugh. "We only have seven minutes, not that hard to understand. Not like there's anything to do in here anyway."

He scooted closer once more, his knees knocking into yours, leaving only a few inches between you two. "Well... there's always one thing we could do," he mumbled, a smirk on his face.

"Yeah? And what's that?"

"Oh, c'mon, don't be dense. You're smart enough to figure it out." Satoru's tone was low, his eyes drifting down your face.

"Maybe." Of course you knew what he was implying - you knew what this game was about when you agreed to play it. But you wanted him to cut the act and stop playing coy. "But you gotta say it, or else I'm not doing anything."

"You want me to say it out loud, hm?" his smile widened and his knee now slotted between your legs.

"Yup. Or we aren't getting anywhere. Say it with your chest."

Gojo rolled his eyes, but your stubbornness amused him. He tilted his head, his lips now just barely ghosting over your ear. "I wanna kiss you," he whispered, trying to keep his composure so as not to sound desperate. "But you're making it very difficult to do so."

That earns a giggle from you. "Aw, poor you." You grab his jaw and shift his head so that he's looking at you directly. His eyes widen, going speechless for a moment. "I guess we'll just have to fix that, hm?" you hum, giving him the same smirk he's been giving you this whole time.

You plant a small kiss on his cheek before pulling away again. He froze with surprise. He tried to regain his composure, but he couldn't hide the small rosy hue that now dusted his cheeks. "You're such a tease, damnit."

"Do something about it, then."

Satoru was getting tired of this game. He mirrored your action, grabbing your chin. He pulled you closer and crashed his lips into yours. You met his affection with equal fervor, quickly sliding your arms around his neck and crawling into his lap. He hummed into the kiss, your mouths embracing like they were specifically molded for one another. You couldn't lie, despite how annoying he was, Satoru Gojo was an incredible kisser. What you didn't know was that he was thinking the same thing about you.

He groans as you run your hands along his neck, all the way up to his undercut. Your hips grind down onto his lap and the two of you make out with the rush of a couple of inexperienced teenagers. Satoru's hands find your hips, pulling you impossibly closer to him while your tongues meld together.

Much to your dismay, just as your kiss was starting to heat up into something better, the door swung open - the hallway light cascading into the room.

"Time's up, lovebirds!"

sorry for ending it LMAO

i'm just evil like that >:)

[aemondsquill]

In Honor's Name

Aemond Targaryen × Fem!Reader

Synopsis: Your new husband, Prince Aemond Targaryen, is truly an enigma. While he is cold and dismissive, he also proves to be quite the formidable protector of his lady wife

A/N: reader is from an unspecified House and has no physical descriptions

Warnings: Aemond's rizz is atrocious, violence, toxic relationship, hurt/comfort, Aemond IS a WIFE GUY, slight angst, floooof, implications of smut

Aemond Targaryen was not known for wearing his heart on his sleeve; actually it was quite the contrary, much to the dismay of his brand new wife. Attempting any form of conversation with the man was like yanking nails. He only gave one word answers or hum in response.

However, while he was not gifted in the arts of wooing his wife with his words, Y/N appreciated just how physically attentive he was. A gentle hand on her lower back when he guided her through the halls of the Keep, his fingers resting on her knee during long dinners, or his presence looming over her shoulder at banquets and feasts. These touches were the only indication that he even tolerated her.

----

Y/N was in no mood for the festivities laid out before her. Aegon decided to throw another feast for whichever unknown Lord's nameday or birth of an heir or perhaps he was just bored. Aemond, as always, was seated next to her. If he had not helped Y/N into her own seat, she would not even had known that he was there. The silence between them seemed to be even more stifling than the obnoxious noises of merriment that echoed through the great hall.

Y/N glared at the couples dancing, envious that they seemed to be enjoying themselves. She learned the hard way that Aemond does not dance. A sharp 'no' from his lips when she invited him to dance on their wedding day was enough to discourage her from ever asking again.

'How lucky am I to be married to such a bland brooding man?' She thought scornfully. He was confusing with his gentle touches, but harsh words and Y/N was done trying to figure him out. She would only do her duty: be a loyal wife and produce an heir or two. It wasn't much of a life, but there were worse ways to live.

Y/N reached for her cup, full of a dark Dornish red, and drank it greedily. The wine was delightfully bitter on her tongue.

Soon enough, a buzz flowed through her veins like warmed honey and made her brain slightly heavy. Y/N's spirits were lifted as the music swelled and the laughter all around her felt contagious.

With a new surge of confidence, Y/N turned to her ever-stoic husband. He eyed her curiously at her sudden movement.

"I supposed I shan't ask you for a dance, Lord husband, allow me to take my leave so I may find a willing partner." Without waiting for a response, Y/N shot out of her seat and grasped her velvety skirts and stalked towards Tyland Lannister.

Aemond's mouth gaped, slightly resembling a fish plucked out of the water. He could only watch helplessly as his wife, giggling and eyes shining, began an elegant waltz with the Lannister.

His knuckles turned white as he gripped his fork tightly, jealousy boiling in his chest at the site of Tyland gripping his wife's waist and twirling her about.

Perhaps Aemond deserved to watch his wife fall for another. He knew he had not been a doting husband, but at least he wasn't cruel. He just felt uncomfortable expressing his affection for his Y/N!

Aemond would not accept the consequences of his own actions. She was his and everyone in the Keep would know it, especially that slimy cunt Tyland.

His anger was only spurred on when he watched the Lannister grip Y/N's arm tightly and whisper a salacious secret into her ear. Her face contorted in offense, causing Aemond to nearly leap over the table in front of him.

In a split second, Aemond was nose to nose with blond Lannister.

"I will fucking tear your eyes out of your head and force them down your throat if you so much as glance at my wife again." Even Y/N felt the chill of fear tingle her spine at Aemond's threat. Tyland only smirked at the brutal confrontation. Copious amounts of wine and ale only made Tyland more bold. And foolish.

Aemond placed his hand on the small of her back, more forcefully than usual.

"Come, wife, allow me to escort you to your chambers."

"Perhaps if you weren't such a frigid cunt maybe your wife wouldn't seek company elsewhere. Leave her to me and trust she will be taken care of."

Y/N felt the surge of humiliation warm her cheeks at Tyland's horrific words. The anger rolled off Aemond's shoulders in heavy waves as Tyland tugged Y/N back into his chest and continued his vicious tirade.

"Unhand my wife and I shall reward you with a swift death."

"I heard your wife has the sweetest cunt in Westeros", his nose grazed along her neck, inhaling her scent. "I wish to taste her."

A vile glint flashed across Aemond's violet eye and in an instant he yanked Y/N out of Tyland's arms, tossing her carelessly as he pursued the Lannister further.

Y/N yelped as she stumbled to the stony floor. She could only watch in horror as her husband's hands wrapped around Tyland's throat so hard that the veins bulged.

"I am the only one who will taste my wife's cunt."

Tyland's face turned red, then blue, then an ugly shade of purple as Aemond's hands slowly squeezed the life out of him. Tyland feebly attempted to grip Aemond's arms, chest, anything he could get his hands on as he crumpled to the floor.

"She tastes of the sweetest honey. She will only bear my heirs. She is mine and only mine." Y/N couldn't help the feeling of her cheeks flush at Aemond's obscene flattery.

Aemond did not let up his assault. Instead, the bulging of Lord Lannister's eyes seemed to egg him on to press harder and harder.

Y/N shouted for the nearby guards to stop her husband from killing his House's ally.

It took nearly four men to wretch Aemond away from the scoundrel. Once he stood he shrugged off their hands and immediately stalked towards Y/N. Her eyes widened in fear as she stumbled backwards slightly. Her flinch halted Aemond in his tracks briefly, a pang rattled his chest painfully. His little display of violence and jealousy only scared his beloved wife.

Aemond took a couple more steps, this time with caution so as not to frighten her more before placing his hand on her back.

"Let us retire, little wife." And she allowed him to guide her back to her chambers in silence.

The winding corridors allowed her to replay the scene over and over in her head. Never had she seen Aemond react to anything in such a way. Nor had he spoken this many words to her in the few months they had been married.

They reached the large oak doors of Y/N's chambers and Aemond ushered her inside.

"You should not have done that. You could have killed him."

Aemond regarded her coldly, "I wish I did. I wish everyone in that hall witnessed me killing him." Y/N rolled her eyes at his stubbornness. Aemond approached her and reached for her hand, but she pulled away before speaking sternly at him.

"No. You do not get to touch me after embarrassing your House like that and nearly killing a man!"

"I was defending your honor! Tis my duty as your husband!" He snarled. He reached out and grabbed at her again, this time pulling her into his chest and she squirmed against him.

"Stop resisting me. I wish to hold my wife and I shall do so!"

Never had Aemond been so vocal and obvious about his affection towards her. It threw Y/N into a whirlwind of emotion.

Finally, she stopped fighting against him and met his glare with her own. The two breathed heavily against each other, neither used to such intimate proximity outside of fucking.

"I have been damned by the gods to love you."

Y/N scoffed. "I never knew you could be so romantic. First you nearly kill a man, now you're saying you hate loving me."

Aemond closed his eye and sighed, mentally kicking himself for his fumbled words. His arm tightend around her waist. Y/N was annoyed at the warmth that flooded her chest at the feeling.

"I love you, little wife. So much so, my words seemed to escape me, but it's true. In the short time we've been married I have fallen deeper than I can possibly fathom. It frightens me. Seeing Tyland Lannister put his hands on you drove me to the brink of madness. I would kill a thousand men and their widows if you asked me to."

Y/N's eyes softened at his clumsy declaration. In his own strange and murderous way, he held a great affection for her and Y/N's heart melted at the thought.

She brushed a lock of hair out of his eye, sighing.

"You know you cannot kill every man who speaks to me."

"I know, but I can kill most of them." She chuckled at his attempt at a jest.

Aemond found himself not able to resist any longer. He kissed her soft supple lips with fervor. Y/N moaned softly in delight.

"I have to make good on a promise I made to that Lannister cunt, little wife."

[cactusnymph]

A Former Borg And A Half-Klingon Walk Into A Bar

“You did not tell me that we would be going to a bar”, Seven says in that tone of hers that always sounds judgmental, no matter what she says. And, as always, it pisses B’Elanna off.

“I don’t want to be here anymore than you do, alright? I was volunteered.”

“You would think that after all that time in the Delta Quadrant there would be more Klingons in Starfleet to be ‘volunteered’ for this sort of mission”, Seven responds, looking around warily. Her hair is in its usual perfect updo and she’s wearing—well. At least she’s not wearing one of her usual cat suits. But to say that she’s dressed well for the occasion would go a little too far. She looks extremely bland, dressed in a dark sort of suit.

B’Elanna thinks that maybe someone should have briefed her better on what exactly it is that they’re doing down here.

“Open some of those buttons”, B’Elanna says, gesturing at Seven’s button up shirt. Seven raises one perfect eyebrow.

“Excuse me?”

“Your buttons. You look like a business woman who took a wrong turn. This is a Klingon bar. If people in there are supposed to believe that you came here voluntarily you have to slut it up a little”, B’Elanna says. Seven’s eyebrow raises even further.

“’Slut it up’?”, she answers.

“Have you met Klingons? All they do is fight and fuck. So if you want to go in there and not do the fighting, you have to look like you’re there for the fucking.”

There is a pause in which B’Elanna thinks that Seven is going to punch her in the face or simply turn around and leave. Instead, she slowly raises her hand to undo four buttons of her shirt, revealing a terribly perfect cleavage. B’Elanna was never self-conscious about her body—aside from its Klingon features, of course—but standing next to Seven can make even the most confident woman feel a little lackluster.

She nods emphatically and tousles up her own hair while Seven stares at her unblinkingly.

“What?”

“I am simply trying to infer how your clothes look as if you are here to ‘fuck’”, she says. B’Elanna crosses her arms in front of her chest. She’s wearing simple dark pants and a vest that shows off her toned biceps.

“Seven. No offense. But this is a lesbian bar. Lesbians love a good biceps.”

Another pause.

“Lesbian. As in homosexual female Klingons.”

B’Elanna can’t help but snort.

“Yes. Why else did you think they would send you here? Could’ve gone with… I don’t know. Someone who’s not a walking fridge.”

“I assume that many biceps in this bar will be more impressive than yours, seeing as to how you are only half Klingon”, Seven says and B’Elanna could swear that there’s the hint of a smirk beginning to form in the corner of her mouth.

“Yeah, what can I say. I’m counting on being a fuckable novelty. Let’s go. And try not to look so—well. Like you.”

Being back on Earth has allowed B’Elanna many things. Taking a guest teaching job at the academy, getting back in touch with some old friends and also… well. Getting to know some of her new friends better now that they’re back home. She’s spent an astounding amount of time with Harry, seeing as to how the two of them couldn’t be more different. And after a while off from the whole Starfleet thing, she also decided to go back to active duty, ending up more often than not with Seven.

B’Elanna never thought she’d ever help anyone else adept to Starfleet Academy or find herself arguing on behalf of it or going on an undercover extraction mission with Seven to a lesbian Klingon bar. But when the Captain asks nicely, B’Elanna is bad at saying no. She owes that woman so much.

“Would it not make more sense to pretend that we are a homosexual couple”, Seven says, pulling B’Elanna out of her thoughts and back into the real world in which Seven’s cleavage is very distracting and the Klingon hard-rock coming from inside the bar is still very loud.

Now it’s her time to pause.

“You want to pretend to be a couple. With me”, she says.

Ah, there’s that eyebrow again.

“It seems the most logical course of action. And I would, in fact, not need to look as if I was searching for sexual conquest if I am already there with a partner.”

B’Elanna can’t help but laugh about that, but she decides that maybe now is not the best time to explain the Klingon love for an orgy or the concept of polyamory to her. Instead she grabs Seven’s arm and puts it around her own shoulder before she loops her own arm around Seven’s waist.

“Well then, Ensign. Are you ready to be a lesbian?”, she asks.

“I do not think—“

“It was a joke, Seven. Loosen up.”

“Right. A joke”, Seven says, not commenting on how she has never loosened up in her life or how ‘I am Borg. I do not loosen up’. B’Elanna thinks it to herself and chuckles quietly, trying not to think about how well they actually fit together like this as they step towards the bouncers—two enormous Klingon women, wearing very little—and push open the doors.

The music thrums inside B’Elannas ribcage as they make their way towards the bar. Most of the women in here are drinking bloodwine, but there are some non-Klingons who carry fancy, colorful drinks that sparkle in the low light. B’Elanna takes note of the brawls taking place over in a corner, of the door to a separate room that probably leads to something Seven has never seen before in her entire life, Borg or no Borg, and she scans the room for their target.

“I have found our target”, Seven says next to B’Elanna. “She is sitting at one of the round tables, playing what looks to be a game involving daggers and three very lightly dressed women.”

B’Elanna doesn’t need much longer to find Sukav Resh after that particular description. She is indeed surrounded by three women who wear barely more than leather underwear and some jewelry that proudly and clearly proclaims their sexual preferences to the entire room. Most people out in these types of bars wear it. It’s not because Klingon’s are too shy to ask, they simply value efficiency. Threatening someone and buying them drinks to get laid only to find out that they’re not compatible with you is a waste of time for everyone.

“Should we attempt to join in this knife game to get the information we need?”, Seven asks and B’Elanna can’t help it. It’s simply all a little surreal.

“Would you say that you’re a submissive bottom looking to be thrown across a room, bitten extensively and spanked all night?”, she asks.

“I am unclear what my own sexual preferences have to do with our target”, Seven says, looking puzzled. B’Elanna wishes it was easier to rile her up. No fun at all.

“The women she has at her table all wear jewelry signaling that that’s what they’re looking for and look at Resh’s chains and the metal piece on her right hand. She’s signaling that she’s looking for someone to rough up, to put it mildly. So I doubt she’d want us there unless we advertise ourselves as such”, B’Elanna says, stepping up to the bar and shouting at the barmaid in Klingon to get her attention and buy her and Seven a drink.

“You have extensive knowledge about these things, Lieutenant.”

B’Elanna hands Seven a drink.

“I dabbled. Back in my academy days.”

“Dabbled”, Seven repeats. “You have had many relations with male crew-members over the course of our journey, but none with female crew-members.”

“Seven, I’m not going to discuss my sexual preferences with you while we’re on a job”, B’Elanna says and Seven opens her mouth, closes it again and sniffs her drink before pulling a face that makes B’Elanna laugh.

“That’ll put some chest on your chest”, she says with a big grin and throws her drink back.

“I doubt that I need more ‘chest’ on my chest”, Seven says and it makes B’Elanna laugh more. She looks at Seven’s cleavage and then back up.

“Yeah. Maybe not.”

Seven sips her drink and looks as if she would love nothing more than to spit it back out. But, like a brave Klingon warrior, Seven swallows her small sip and then turns her back to Sukav Resh.

“If you have intricate knowledge of these… mating rituals. Then we should make use of them to get to the target. What kind of jewelry do I need to—signal all of that. What you said before.”

“You mean that you’re a submissive bottom who wants to be—“

“Yes. That”, Seven interrupts. Maybe her cheeks look a little red, but maybe it’s just the drink or the lighting. Either way, B’Elanna finds herself weirdly charmed by it. It’s not often that you see Seven of Nine even remotely flustered.

“You don’t have to do it. I doubt you’d survive two seconds at that table. I can do it. I’ll get the information we need and when I have it we’ll find the backroom they do their business in”, B’Elanna says, opening up her vest and starting to rummage around in her pockets. She finds what she’s looking for and hands Seven a heavy necklace while she puts three metal bracelets on her left wrist.

“You had all of this at home”, Seven says and it’s not a question. B’Elanna does not comment on it. She takes Seven’s drink from her, throws the rest of it back and then tousles her own hair some more before walking over to where Sukav Resh is sitting. She can immediately feel herself be appraised as she approaches and there’s a familiar tingle that makes its way up her spine and back down into her fingertips.

It’s been a very long time since B’Elanna went to a bar like this and what Seven said is true. But it’s surprisingly easy to fall back into old habits, even if those habits have been put away for a long time. She has no idea what Seven is up to, if she’s watching or buying another drink. The dagger in Resh’s hand spins and B’Elanna smiles before she punches one of the women sitting at Resh’s table square in the face, sending her backwards over a chair.

“So. I can see there’s a seat free here”, she says, grabbing the drink of the woman she just hit and throwing it back. Resh stares up at her and then she starts laughing, hitting the table with one hand.

“I can appreciate some healthy competition. You here to play?”, she asks, looking at the bracelets on B’Elanna’s wrist and the chain dangling between her boobs.

“Why else would I sit here?”, she says, holding out her hand for the dagger. Resh’s grin grows sharp as she hands it over.

“Well then. Let’s play.”

*

One of the reasons why B’Elanna stopped going to these kinds of bars is because of her non-existent ability to regulate her own risk-seeking behavior. Getting through the academy days was already shitty enough without running to the medical facilities every second weekend. The looks of the nurses when they saw the bite marks were usually enough to make B’Elanna’s skin crawl with old, internalized issues she never really dealt with.

Being thrown back into it is… weird. And thrilling. B’Elanna likes being rough and she likes it the other way around too, she simply has a preference of roughing up men and being roughed up by women. Seven doesn’t need to know that. B’Elanna might have thought about Seven being just as strong as a Klingon with her Borg enhancements. Usually the people B’Elanna fights—or fucks—can’t hold a candle to her strength. Most of them are humans.

But Seven could probably—well. It doesn’t matter. It’s not a road B’Elanna should go down. She has a job to do and a kid to raise with a husband she’s getting divorced from. Adding sexual desires for her former Borg colleague to the mix would simply complicate things too much.

After half an hour B’Elanna is tipsy bordering on drunk, has three minor stab wounds in her arm and has been promoted to sit on Resh’s right thigh. This is definitely not how she saw the night going. She has the info. But she needs an out so she can reconvene with Seven to find the backroom for that damned business transaction. Resh grabs B’Elanna’s chin roughly and turns it towards her face. B’Elanna maybe licks her lips, trying her hardest to remember that she’s here on a mission and that she’s on duty—but she doesn’t have to ponder this for very long, because right as she’s about to elbow her way out of this situation, she’s pulled out of Resh’s lap and before B’Elanna can say anything to stop it, Resh is thrown halfway across the room.

“The game is over”, Seven says, cheeks a little flushed and hair in slight disarray. It looks really good on her.

“What are you doing?”, B’Elanna hisses, trying not to stare at Seven’s cleavage or to think about how hot it is that Seven can throw a Klingon across a room as if they weigh nothing. Thankfully Klingons love bar brawls, fights and any kind of violence, so the second Resh is thrown over to the dance-floor, three full brawls erupt and they manage to duck away into one of the side rooms.

“Do you have the information”, Seven says, making her question sound like a statement as she’s so often want to do.

“I do. I could have gotten out of there by myself, you know”, she says, feeling a little flustered. Seven raises one eyebrow.

“I am sure you could have. But I was being propositioned by nine different women while you were gone and I was tired of waiting.”

B’Elanna snorts and looks around.

“The backroom is down this corridor. Third door on the right”, B’Elanna says, looking around. “I don’t think we’re supposed to be here—“

Right on cue there’s a commotion at the entrance of the corridor and some shouting about “They went that way!” and B’Elanna doesn’t really have any great ideas aside from the one.

“Follow my lead”, she hisses and grabs Seven by the collar. Seven looks quizzical, eyes darting around to find an out. There is none. So B’Elanna does the only thing she can think of to justify them being in this corridor without immediately being thrown out by a bunch of angry Klingon lesbians.

She tucks on Seven’s collar, hard, pulling her down and forward before she presses herself against the wall, hoping that Seven gets the gist of it. The seconds their mouths collide Seven makes a sound that is half surprise, half something else and B’Elanna finds herself reveling in it, blood boiling and heat rushing through her body.

Seven’s lips are incredibly soft and incredibly clumsy.

But despite her obvious discomfort and surprise, she reacts immediately, grabbing B’Elanna’s wrists and pinning them to the wall above her head. B’Elanna tries to tug on them and yes. It would take her serious effort to get out of this. She makes a big show to struggle against Seven’s grip, kissing her hard and with most likely too much tongue and teeth for Seven’s liking, but the second the voices come closer and two people stare down the corridor there’s just loud laughter and some crude whistling before the women disappear to leave them to their make-out session.

B’Elanna almost forgets that this is her colleague and that they’re undercover, because her tongue in Seven’s mouth feels incredible and the tight grip restraining her is making her heart soar. Seven’s boobs are pressed up against her and… yeah. It’s hot. Hot as fuck.

The second they’re alone in the corridor again Seven releases B’Elanna’s grip and pulls back from the kiss. Her cheeks are bright red now and her hair has given up on staying tied up entirely. B’Elanna thinks she should wear it like this more often. They stare at each other, both of them breathing hard.

B’Elanna licks her lips.

“Sorry. That was my only idea”, she says a little sheepishly. Seven swallows visibly, then turns her head away.

“I will live”, she says, deadpan. B’Elanna laughs, a little breathlessly. So they make their way down the corridor and B’Elanna tries to think as clearly as possible through the alcohol and the aroused haze that has taken over her brain now.

There’s a beat of silence as they inch forward. Then.

“Will you explain the jewelry to me after this is over? For… scientific research.”

B’Elanna has to stifle a laugh and presses a fist against her mouth. The mouth that was just kissing Seven a few seconds ago.

“Sure thing, Seven. I can help you do some research.”

This mission definitely didn’t go as B’Elanna expected. But apparently that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

[blacklegsanjiii]

I saw the post you reblog (about Bepo and Law and favouritism) and it got me thinking what if Sanji and Bepo got closer in Wano (because he is so fluffy and warm) and Chopper got jealous lol.

Like beforehand other than the ladies Chopper always got special treatment, but now it's the ladies, Chopper, and Bepo.

Also I feel like it will fit into the golden!Sanji, Sanji is not into stuffed animal, he is literally is into real animal. Always try to bring home real animal (tame and wild) that Mihawk have a hard time saying no to.

Idk it's so weird and random

Welcome back! This is hilarious and I think fits in really well with Lawsan too.

Sanji definitely brought a lot of animals to Mihawk. After a while Sanji got along with the human drills but they're not pets. It seemed almost every supply runs Sanji would wander up with some new animal to Mihawk. Mihawk takes a deep breath and tells his son gently at first that they cannot have an animal on the island because of the human drills. The more it happens though the more bland and less gentle as the years go on.

Mihawk will find his child in a park covered in animals. Sanji gets a flea bath every time before they leave and it's almost comical to the point that Sanji will just do it. Before he leaves for Baratie Mihawk warns Zeff, who doesn't believe him.

Until Sanji befriended almost all the East Blues animals during restocks. Mihawk laughs, sharp and short over the den den before hanging up on Zeff. He won't say 'i told you so' but he will laugh. Sanji is probably so good with animals because of his observation haki but that also means he's amazing with minks. But Chopper is first and Chopper sees Sanji spoil the ladies and while it's not to the same level Chopper's sweet tooth is often catered too. Plus when Chopper has nightmares Sanji will take him to the galley and make hot cocoa with lots of whip cream and marshmallows and sprinkles.

When Sanji starts screwing around with Law, he keeps hearing about Bepo and loves hearing about Law's crew from the surgeon. He shares some facts about his dad in exchange. He hears all about Bepo and Law teases him about the ladies and Chopper which Sanji laughs off, says they're cute like Bepo in a way. Sanji also says he can't wait to meet Bepo. He doesn't get to meet Bepo until he's in Wano. When the crews are all gathered and Luffy is proudly displaying the 'Dracule Sanji' and it's not the 330,000,000 bounty, it's like 700 million something if not higher. Law is rubbing his temples. Sanji looks exhausted and falls asleep and Bepo lays next to him because he's tired and then passes out. Sanji burrows into the bear to sleep and Law is losing it internally. As is Chopper because it happens through all of Wano. They're freaking out in different ways.

Eventually Sanji brings Chopper with him to the Tang and tells Law they're having a sleepover and to get Bepo and as much as he wanted alone time with his boyfriend he agrees but has his questions. It's before they leave Wano so they have more time after the raid and Chopper has said he missed cuddling Sanji and has been getting jealous so Sanji smiles and hauls him up.

"Why are we doing this?" Law asks.

"Chopper thinks I like Bepo too much but he hasn't cuddled Bepo so I need to show him and I do it now you won't be as pissy later." Sanji points at as Chopper hides his face in embarrassment and calls him a dummy and meanie.

"I take offense." Law bites as he leaves to get Bepo.

"You were supposed!" Sanji yells after him. When he returns with the bear and they all lay on Law's bed(and Bepo because he takes up most of the bed) it only takes a few minutes for the bear to be out and Sanji tucking Chopper into his front as Law spoons, pouting into her neck.

"Wow he is soft." Chopper yawns.

"Mhm, so are you, Chopper, now get some sleep." Sanji coos as he pets him. He falls asleep not long after and Sanji puffs a laugh softly. "You're still pouting." He smirks.

"I thought Nico-ya and Zoro-ya spoiled him enough." Law grumbles.

"He's adorable, I can spoil him too. No one said I couldn't." Sanji grins as Law adjusts himself to lean over him. "By all accounts I spoil you as well, shitty surgeon."

"Oi." Law gruffs.

"You sound like my dad. He would always get upset when I brought something home, even when it wasn't dangerous." Sanji pouts this time. Law looks at him appalled and taken back.

"What the hell were you bringing home to Mihawk that made him upset?" He asks.

"Birds, mice, rats, a few cats, one time a circus broke out on the island we'd do supply runs at and he and the ring leader found me with most of the animals. Then he killed the ring leader." Sanji lists off.

"You're like a goddamned fairytale princess." Law says kissing him.

"Mm, he wasn't happy when I found a wolf and wanted to keep it." Sanji hums.

"Did you?" Law grins.

"No, shitty bastard said we had the human drills and that was enough." Sanji bemoans.

"My poor darling, you only had some apes on the island as pets." Law laughs as he lays back down after they share another kiss.

"Nah, they had swords, they weren't pets." Sanji mumbles as sleep starts taking him. Law blinks a few times as the words sink in but he's out by the time he collects his thoughts on the matter.

[sealofarchives]

Misc mini-oneshot 1 (Mainly platonic)

Warnings: None

A/N: I didn't make any edits so if some of the dialogue feels wonky (I had to deal with some annoying real life stuff which sort of influenced to writing this)

This is probably shorter than what I usually write so, I don't want to jinx myself with other stuff while I'm busy with classes

The three turtles hovered over the softshell turtle's shoulders as Donnie looked over (Y/N)'s new phone and the phone case covering it.

"For something that's supposed to protect the phone, Raph doesn't get why it has to be close to 50 bucks..."

"Its mainly because of the phone case, also acting as a charging system for some wireless ports."

"I still don't believe its quote on quote 'made of recyclable material' from what the packaging box says."

Donnie hands back your phone to you as you sighed.

"I kind of got rushed to pick a case because apparently there's also a difference between the regular and pro versions."

"I didn't want to stick with a bland basic color one but, the other options were either really tacky stuff. Or just random flower decorations."

"I think the flowers look really nice!"

"We could surprise you with a different phone case for your birthday!"

You smiled back at Mikey as his brothers were slightly humored at the idea.

"No offense, still insane that you went a week and four days only using it for assignments."

"And when you spent an entire Sunday waiting on a replacement battery from the store. Only for it to be a waste of time, realizing how old the phone really is."

You winced looking at the new phone just as Raph lightly smacked Leo's forehead from his comment.

"The old phone was a gift from one of my aunts but, since it takes like an hour to get there. Including her being busy with work, where it took until this Monday where she finally got the transfer pin..."

"I don't want to drive the same bad luck at Donnie."

"I dunno you were pretty lucky that your teacher got your email about the sudden situation. And she didn't mind the small updates in case the phone battery got in the way of your assignments."

"Also you got to see an old favorite character of yours from an unexpecting place regarding this year's halloween theme."

"Donnie would have gone into mad scientist mode if he got stuck with the situation you were in."

Donnie furrowed his brows at the box shell turtle in annoyance as you quickly changed the subject.

"Part of me was kind of stubborn not wanting to start fresh with the new phone."

"Like I was realizing how much I saved a lot of goofy photos of stuff I like and eventually..."

"The good times we have hanging out together."

"I might have gone on my parents' nerves about it but, I don't regret making that decision. Even if it felt like a witch cursed me with the worst tech issues."

Gentle smiles brightened the lair as Donnie scoffed.

"A cybernetic witch is nothing compared to my superb tech ninpo!"

"She could not handle the arsensal of various weapons aimed at her or making the worst mistake of picking on (Y/N)!"

"Mikey was right about the mad scientist part, just under a different context."

Donnie then proceeded to chase after his siblings as Raph saw a glance of your phone's screen.

The alligator snapping turtle grinning at the same photo that finally made you part of their chaotic friend group. Almost squished together in a group hug with April but, you hugging back at them.

[tempestswing]

Ranking the Dark Council:

hi! I was writing some notes for a piece of SWTOR fiction I am working on, and decided to create this list as a fun way to share that information.

Dark Council Pre-Shadow of Revan:

12. Darth Aruk - we know nothing about this character, other than that they were head of the Sphere of Sith Philosophy. According to the Wiki, rooting out Revanites was supposed to be their job. What a failure, hopefully they still have a job after Shadow of Revan?

11. Darth Rictus - Also kind of a mystery, which is ironic since he was head of the Sphere of Mysteries. Rictus does appear in a novel called 'Annihilation', but that book is mostly about Theron Shan. All we really know about Rictus is that he's (A) old, (B) dislikes aliens, unless they're murderous enough, and (C) founded the Dread Executioners to take down the Dread Masters. Not enough information to rank any higher.

10. Darth Acharon - at least this guy appears in the game. He's kind of a nothing character though. He defended the imperial occupation of Corellia unsuccessfully. He was head of the Sphere of Biotics. Since he died on Corellia, he would presumably have been replaced by Shadow of Revan, but we don't know who by.

9. Darth Arkous - hate this guy, but he's still technically head of the Sphere of Military Offense after the Hutt Cartel plotline. God, what a bag of dicks he is though. The one good thing about this character is that he's technically Lana Beniko's master? Although she's an advisor rather than an apprentice, so he gets no credit for the existence of awesome Sith wife.

8. Darth Decimus - Also found in game on Corellia! Decimus is actually present in the imperial quests, so you get a lot more interaction with him than Acharon. Canonically, he also trained Krovos! Krovos is really cool, so decimus should get a few points by association. Not enough to bump him up the list though. For the head of Military Strategy, he's not a very good commander.

7. Darth Ravage - You can meet Ravage at the end of the Inquisitor and Warrior storylines, and for all imperials he is present during the cutscenes preceding the Emperor Malgus flashpoints (although does nothing to help?). The main reason I'm putting Ravage so low is that he's a little bit inconsistently written. He'll gladly say "good riddance" to Darth Thanaton's death in the inquisitor plotline, but if you kill Baras in the Warrior plotline, he'll show up at Nathema and be all offended that you claimed power by murdering your master... does he know what a Sith is?

6. Darth Mortis - I have a bit of a soft spot for Mortis. He's got a no-nonsense demeanour which is rare amongst Sith, and he's clearly serious enough about their philosophy to join a secret conspiracy against the alliance if you "squander" the power of the Eternal Throne - a petty move, this man is a bitch after my own heart. He also is the one who snaps Darth Thanaton's silly little neck, which definitely earns him a few points in my eyes. As a point, he's involved in the Macrobinocular missions, which I did not enjoy, but he was a highlight of the questline.

5. Darth Acina - WOMEN IN POWER!!! Empress Acina is better than Emperor Vitiate. Unfortunately Acina is kind of bland, I really don't feel strongly about her either way. I've killed her on Iokath in most of my playthroughs, even if I don't intend to defect to the republic later. I might be lesbian but I just don't like her that much. Her reforms to the Empire are interesting though, I do have to give her credit for making the Empire slightly less racist and Sith dominated.

4. Darth Vowrawn - Silly guy!! This man is genuinely quite funny. He's a blast to spend time with at the end of the Warrior story, after dealing with Baras' grumpy ass for close to fifty levels. His choice to help the Wrath with the Hand on Rishi says... something. He's genuinely an interesting character to me, especially since he maintains that joviality when he becomes Emperor. It's tempered, to be sure, but I think it does show it wasn't entirely an act. Vowrawn could be a genuine friend to the Wrath.

3. Darth Jadus - Sue me, I like unapologetically evil characters. Jadus is not just an evil clown, he's an evil circus. Schemer to the core and melodramatic as fuck. I chose to serve him without a second thought in my agent playthrough. I appreciated the name drop on Iokath and I have 1% chance 99% cope that he will return at some point in the story.

2. Darth Occlus/Nox/Imperius - OCs are fun. No further notes. I should probably drop the lore for my verison of this character, huh... maybe in another post.

Darth Marr - Everyone's favourite tired Dad just trying to keep his society from collapsing as his colleagues bicker about inane bullshit. I reckon he drinks coffee straight outta the pot in the Dark Council's break room. I really wish he hadn't died, but his force ghost shenanigans were neat and I liked seeing him find a measure of redemption. Again, I am on a high dose of copium but if Malgus can return after being killed and abandonded on an exploding space station why can't someone scrape Marr off the floor of Zakuul and rebuild him. I do also low-key ship Marr with Satele Shan?

anyway, that's my totally subjective ranking of Dark Council members.

[beadyeyes]

Alien Romulus review so spoilers because I'm so so disappointed after being told by every one how good it was and how great the effects were (you all lied to me) so so so long so so so so I don't know if it's worth reading

👍 Loved that they kept up the tradition of killing the people who smoke on screen first

👍 Technology design choices were so fun and did what Prometheus failed to do as a PREQUEL. Also failed to do what the movie itself should've done as a SEQUEL and kept notably similar design choices BUT STILL ADVANCE THE TECHNOLOGY?

👎 They made a group of people so unlikable or undeveloped that I didn't care if they lived or died.

👎 The cousins blatant bigotry against Andy came off mostly as racist AND ableist with no good reason whatsoever. Especially since it clearly wasn't justified by his mother's death because the synthetic in question that "caused her death" was justified in saving more lives over the few. His choice to leave his own family behind despite being so torn up about his mom too? And finally his weird breathing and hovering scene with the pregnant sister right after his girlfriend died was lowkey creepy and I hope it wasn't trying to imply he was the one who got her pregnant? Bottom line he deserved it and his death was the only entertaining one. Was that supposed to be on purpose?

👎 The boyfriend was a bland unlikeable character who failed to even be good enough for meat fodder + deserved to die for wasting screen time AND for letting his cousin be a racist dick to Andy despite them needing the for the whole fucking trip to happen. Worthless character.

👎 First facehugger impregnation being a woman. What a spit in the face.

👎 The fact that it was also a woman I didn't even know the name of! But had 1 more second of development than the rest and seemed like she could've been a cool character if the screen time wasn't logged by unlikeable men. Her alien birth scene was so tone deaf to the original horror of the series idk. I get not wanting to repeat the same thing but the worthless guys survived those facehuggers too easily for her to be the gratuitous birth fodder.

👎 Pregnant sister. I don't know how that could've been done differently but yea. Her boob slime was so. 🙄

👎 Her alien wannabe engineer baby thing sucked. It was so corny I laughed outloud I don't know how it could've been done better but making the aliens more humanoid but not in an uncanny way, like a weird trying too hard to be scary way, felt like a disservice to the viewers intelligence? The fact that it was a full sized thing in like 3 seconds too? No offense but wouldn't it be scarier to fight something small and newborn baby like instead of Grown Ass White Man #72

👎 Rooks facetracking shit was so gagworthy and bringing him back wasn't the tribute to the og movie like they wanted it to be. Remember how the big bang theory would make references by just naming randome nerd shit in succession? That's what he was. Just because you have a character come back doesn't mean it fits the theme of the movie you're developing.

👎 Rook's non-ambiguous characterization as evil. Just lame and defeats the complexity of the original character as well as how the synthetics have been developed.

👎 Her name is Rain and that's my name she wishes she was me so bad.

Rain was just so? Such an underdeveloped character who kicked ass and I appreciated her like? Waiting till Andy had seizure to help him out? I don't know. She just had no backstory or substance and Andy's whole character being there to protect her was fucking lame. Seeing her change that at the last bit was like yay development but then Andy gets killed so then it was just whatever.

Andy's character again, being there to protect Rain and not develop on his own. His disabilities being "cured" for most of the movie. Why the accent? Anyways I'm glad he was there because he was the shining star of the whole thing and even that felt a bit too on the nose as if they knew every one else was worthless.

The movie had a few jumpscares and the gore was nothing compared to ANY of the previous movies. Ultimately I felt nothing for the entire hour and half except for when the cousin got slimed, which I laughed. The mix of CGI was strange. 1 out of 10 as fuck! Do you think they're gonna make a sequel?

[changbokkii]

“You’ll be okay”

Paring: Kuina x reader (platonically) (Maybe some Chishiya x reader)

Summary: your best friend, Kuina helps you through your wild pregnancy journey.

…

"Come on, come on, come on..." you sighed heavily and looked down but looked back up when you heard the door open and loud music in the background. Standing there was a blonde man with shoulder length hair and a white zip-up jacket. Wasn't his name Chishiya? Kuina told you about him but you've never met him before. It's interesting how a dude can look so beautiful.

"Hi! Is Kuina here?"

"Yeah, she's in her room blasting music. You can come in if you'd like"

His voice was bland and cold. It matched his apathetic appearance but still. He stepped aside for you to come in and as you walked in he shut the door. You walked over to Kuina's room and knocked. The loud music that was playing suddenly stopped.

"Come in!" You slowly opened the door and walked in and Chishiya followed behind you.

"I'm going home Kuina." Chishiya said, his voice not changing from his nonchalant tone.

"Okay, Bye!"

Chishiya waved and left out the door.

"Hey you okay? You don't look like your normal self. You're normally loud and annoying. No offense though because I like you like that."

"Well...there's something I've been needing to tell you...I ummm...im pregnant.."

"YOU'RE WHAT!?"

Kuina shouted loudly that her neighbors could probably hear her but she didn't care as she already has enough noise complaints as it is.

"You're pregnant!? By who?! Don't tell me it's your boyfriend!"

"W-well..."

"He's no good for you! I've told you this already! He's toxic and he's obviously not ready to raise a child with you!"

She's not wrong. He has cheated on you with many girls and you've forgave him many times. Kuina is extremely pissed every time you do it and when you complain to her every time she gives you the same advice but you do your own thing. The one thing Kuina Hikari hates about you.

You want to leave him, you really do but what are you going to do without him? He think you're nothing without him and maybe he's right. But who knows?

"Can you help me...? If I'm gonna keep the baby I'm going to need some serious support."

"Of course! Besties help each other no matter what! I promise you'll be okay. And they baby as well" You smiled at Kuina and she smiled at you.

"And I couldn't have asked for a better bestie"

"I love you so much!"

"I love you even more!"

You both share a giggle and hug each other and hugged. You start to ramble about the most random things.

"Since bf/n isn't going to be the father of the baby maybe I can convince Chishiya to date you and raise the child."

"First of all, don't make that man do anything he doesn't want to. He looks miserable enough. And second of although he is cute I'm probably not his type."

"I can ask-"

"Absolutely not! If you do I'm going to microwave you on high heat!"

The both of you laughed. You always made jokes like this ever since the two of you met. When strangers heard you make jokes like this, they would look at the both of you concerned. But the both of you know that either of you wouldn't harm each other.

You both share your random thoughts with giggles here and there until you get a notification. It’s from your boyfriend

"I have to go...I'll see you later" You break the hug and start to walk out the front door

"make sure to dump 'em bestie!"

You giggled at her words.

"I will don't worry!"

And with that you left her apartment hoping you will be able to explain your soon-to- be ex boyfriend.

…

When the baby is born Kuina is there by your side holding your hand as you squeeze out the baby.

"You got this n/n! You're almost there!"

You let out another scream of pain and push as hard as you can and the baby was born.

"You did it! I'm so proud of you!"

She hugs you very carefully making sure that she's not hurting you because you are very delicate in this moment.

The doctor hands you the baby. It's wrapped in a pink duvet. It's a girl.

"Awwww! It looks just like you!"

You start to cry tears of joy as you hold your baby girl. You smile down at her and she takes your finger and plays with it.

Even if she doesn’t grow up with a father (or her real one), she has you, Kuina, and possibly chishiya. That’s good enough for you.

…

For the next few days at the hospital Chishiya was your doctor for the rest of the time you spent in there.

“You should be able to leave in a day or two. The baby is healthy and has no health problems. If there’s anything you want or need call me or Kuina.” Chishiya said in his calm voice as he checks your vitals. You nod your head and sigh softly.

“And if you ever need someone to take care of the baby or you call me”

“Thank you”

“It’s no problem. And please don’t try to get up from the bed unless me, another doctor, or Kuina help you.

“Okay…I’ll try”

Chishiya walks out and starts talking to someone. As Chishiya disappears in the distance Kuina comes in with a smile.

“How are you doing?”

“Good I guess”

“Do you need any snacks or anything else?”

“No…but Chishiya is hot-“

“That’s my friend! And I will not be a third wheel the next time we hang out!”

“Weren’t you trying to set me up with him a few months ago-“

“Thats different!”

…

Your baby is now one years old and couldn't be happier. You and Kuina are going to the bar for a girls night out and Kuina convinced Chishiya to take care of your child.

You hear the doorbell ring and you assume it is Chishiya but to your surprise it is you ex Boyfriend...

"Why are you here?"

You ask with a slight tone of surprise and anger. Your ex boyfriend chuckles a bit.

"I just came to see my little girl. Is there something wrong with that?"

"Yes it is! She's not your daughter! You will not be apart of her life!”

Your baby comes crawling over to you

“Mama…mama…”

“Hey sweetheart!”

You pick her up and she lays her head on your shoulder. As soon as she sees bf/n she starts to cry.

“Shhh…it’s okay baby. I won’t let him hurt you.”

Kuina walks up behind you.

“Is something wrong? And what the hell are you doing here!?”

“I’m just trying to see my daughter”

He put his hands up in the air mockingly.

“She’s not your daughter and will never be!”

Your ex boyfriend rolls his eyes and smirks. You wanted to slap his face so bad.

“Hey Y/N go back inside with your baby and I’ll take care of him.”

You nod and walk back into the house.

…

After all that you and Kuina didn’t have a girls night together but instead had a fun night with Chishiya and your baby.

You two laughed your asses off when your baby tried to put make up on Chishiya. Your baby just smiled the whole time.

“Mama!” Your baby said proud of what she did to Chishiya’s face.

You four had the best night together and you couldn’t ask for a better daughter, best friend, and maybe future boyfriend.

[horizon-verizon]

Have you met Daemon Targaryen ?? No seriously, what book did you read? For god’s sake, did you read the scene with Blood and Cheese? It’s unspeakably horrifying! We are supposed to come out of that room realizing that nothing is worth this, that a line has been crossed and innocent lives utterly destroyed, that the man who ordered this is not roguish, but GENUINELY EVIL AND MONSTROUS. Daemon is responsible for ordering his 6 year old great-nephew killed. That the Greens betrayed Rhaenyra does not mean they can be held to account for everything the Blacks did for the rest of the war. This is Morality 101, Daemon is a grown man who knew exactly what he was doing, if he wanted to avenge Lucerys death, why he didn’t murdered Aegon or Aemond?

Really, I know that the ASOIAF fandom is full of male obsessed pick me, but how is it that Daemon, sexual predator and child murderer, never lacks for defenders? Are people just confusing their archetypes and thinking of him as an appealingly roguish and dashing rulebreaker? Because, no, he’s just a blatantly and consistently terrible person. He’s a bland and deathly boring parody of Oberyn (and it’s highly offensive to Oberyn because he seeks vengeance for the violent death of his sister and her babies, while Daemon violently murder children and drive their mother to insanity and suicide).

*EDITED POST* (6/11/24)

A)

We are supposed to come out of that room realizing that nothing is worth this, that a line has been crossed and innocent lives utterly destroyed, that the man who ordered this is not roguish, but GENUINELY EVIL AND MONSTROUS.

Anon may be answering to this post or any of the last dozens of helaena posts.

So....apparently, you didn't think this way when Lucerys (13) died, who was the first child who was killed in cold blood by his older uncle, Aemond (19) after said dude rushed after him, incensed and eager to prove his masculinity after Maris Baratheon mocked him for not fighting this 13 year old. Who killed a child who was acting as an envoy, who was acting as an envoy because their side decided to takeover the Red Keep to hold a council to persuade/force them to crown Aegon and usurp Rhaenyra, thus pushing the blacks to search/survey those who would be at their side in case a war broke out?

Who drew first blood? Who was the first to kill a child? Who invited the inevitable anger and grief of the family of the murdered child? This isn't Romeo and Juliet where the origins of the rivalry are unknown, lost to time.

Who created the heft of the conditions that lead to Rhaenyra's usurpation?

And when did I say Daemon was just and deserved to wreak revenge through a another child's murder, anyway? IF HE ACTUALLY ARRANGED B&C. Show me where I say that, anon. There's such thing as "nuance",

(if Daemon actually did it, bc again link above where I note that GoTHistorian of TikTok explains how it may not have actually been Daemon bc it was just too strategically stupid and risky, and Daemon has shown enormous restraint during the black council--for him, or the expected/reputed version of him--it could have been a party who wanted to either push the sides to war or want to sow discord amongst the greens and withi the blacks as well) Daemon was wrong and responsible for his own response, yes...AND it wasn't an act he just decided to do willy-nilly, as if the other side hadn't done anything likewise.

Look, I'm sorry that not everyone is as sympathetic or as hateful towards Daemon AFTER said kid's adult relatives decided to begin the war in the first place and murder Rhaenyra-Daemon's child. When they were never in any actual danger from either person (you'd have to prove that Daemon was making plans to and under Rhaenyra's nose other than vibes, aside from his last act w/Nettles, he has performed no serious act of rebellion against Rhaenyra's authority/clearest orders). No, his laughing, making fun, and ignoring his own nephews in favor of Rhaenyra is not evidence of him actually plotting their deaths. Does that mean that every time someone you hate or hates you laughs at you, they have to be willing to murder you if they have the chance? The nephews didn't present any sort of active threat, but neither was Daemon really fond of them bc--as the text states--they made him more insignificant....or more likely, bc they happened to be the scions of his own rival, Otto/the Hightowers instead of someone like Aemma Arryn, who was both his first cousin (through his aunt Daella) and from a more dedicated house. We have never seen Daemon perform violence against a perceived enemy unless there are imminent or already-done attacks done against him and those close to him. The greens attacked, so he went after them.

Yes, it ruins Helaena and leads to her suicide. Yeah, murder is bad, and yes this was a tragedy...did you (Aemond) have to invite the anger of the other side without the assurance of meeting them in arms?

And once, more, if we trace the fault, who exactly taught Aemond to be so hostile and mocking of his own nephews? To see Rhaenrya as "stealing" his and Aegon's supposed "birthright"? Since you claim to have read F&B? To inspire him to stoking his rage and jealousy towards the ruin of these "bastards" who he feels has what he is owed--again, not just recourse for the idea, but actually the "birthright"?

I suppose the counterargument is that Jaehaerys' death was "more" tragic or horrific bc he was younger than Lucerys and he wasn't on a dragon or had anything substantial to protect himself. But Lucerys' dragon, Arrax, was way smaller and younger than Vhagar. He was lunchmeat. And Lucerys was still much younger than Aemond, his killer while also being a child himself as Jaehaerys' childness was to Daemon's adultness.

B)

how is it that Daemon, sexual predator and child murderer, never lacks for defenders? Are people just confusing their archetypes and thinking of him as an appealingly roguish and dashing rulebreaker? Because, no, he’s just a blatantly and consistently terrible person. He’s a bland and deathly boring parody of Oberyn (and it’s highly offensive to Oberyn because he seeks vengeance for the violent death of his sister and her babies, while Daemon violently murder children and drive their mother to insanity and suicide).

Well, do you know who Lestat the Vampire is? He's a sort of "rogue" figure in his own way--while being one of the most charismatic figures in literary and fiction history. Called the "Brat Prince", too. Also hates to be told what to do, but very loyal to those he loves. I imagine that some fans' love or awe for Daemon is similar. Lestat is also an objectively terrible person...doesn't stop people from loving and "loving" him for his unpredictability and ability to shake stuff up. People like devil-may-care attitudes with hearty hearts who nevertheless value loyalty, and Daemon's got it all that. So does Oberyn. Both are extremely loyal to their houses and families and indifferent to every one else.

Also part of it is that many of the stuff that people accuse Daemon of doing bc of HotD, he can't have done or he wouldn't have done not out of morality but because it'd bite him in the ass--therefore he's not as "crazed" or irrational as some make him out to be. What's offensive to some people is the disingenuous and/or misinformed indictment of a person--even when that person is evil OR morally ambiguous. Because that disingenuity is more often not about them but about stifling the roguish behavior, the disorder element or because they feel that this attitude reflects an event they experienced at the hands of someone like this character and perceive/relive--like the greens and Otto did--it is a way for people to resist or become some sort of threat to their own plans. Last one may be too personal & reaching, but I'm covering my bases here so I won't have to repeat myself.

C)

I also wouldn't say that Oberyn was a "good" person either. We should probs be careful: but one could say that there's an indication that the way he raised three of his eldest his daughters into them also not doing great things to kids--or planning to--in his name for revenge shows a lack of real care for altruistic morality on his part. Oberyn himself, yes targets the right person, but this doesn't mean he also wasn't doing crazy shit--Obara's mom? Alayaya, the 16 year old prostitute he has sex with while at KL?

And before we say Daemon and the maidens, IF Daemon did that in his youth...

and Oberyn did that to Obara's mother in his youth // Oberyn sleeping with 16 year old Alayaya in his adulthood (42-43)

VS

Daemon didn't continue to sleep with young girls into his 30s or by some evidence b-y-the-text like he did in his late teen-early 20s. There's more evidence from the respective texts to say Oberyn is still sleeping w/teenagers into his 30s and 40s while with Daemon it's much more up in the air officially. Me, I think he didn't--the greens/maesters/people around Dragonstone and Driftmark and KL would have talked of it either against Rhaenyra or just to gossip.

Well. Doesn't look good for your guy.

Look, I do like Oberyn, but I'm not going to say he was Mr. Angelman, that he was Daemon's moral superior either--esp to women, compare his morality to another person, or erase Daemon's decision to sublimate his own claims to support/protect his own family by the Gods Eye episode to do so.

Oberyn, Elia/her kids--Daemon, Rhaenyra/their kids.

It certainly doesn't help that Daemon is a character we have no PoVs for, and we see Oberyn through other characters' PoVs--namely Tyrion's. Or that we aren't in Oberyn's head. Much easier to paint Daemon as categorically worse if we just desire to without feeling the need to support our own thoughts with text-based evidence. But by text-based evidence, Oberyn is not at all a moral superior to Daemon.

I really hope to god you are not also a DaemonxNettles truther. Please. The "sexual predation" better be more about him and Rhaenyra, where it's much comparatively more plausible. The mentioned comparison to Oberyn is sending red flags.