#it's like yeah sorry if you want treatment you either have to be able to pay for it on your own or jump through an amount of hoops that is

[aromanticbastards]

like at this point they can't even really deny that the system is designed to kill mentally ill people

[phagodyke]

was brave and talked to my doctor abt my period bs + she said it might be endometriosis without me even having to bring it up... 💀

[six-eyed-samurai]

SUMMARY: It's been some time since your death and yet none of the Hashira still have the heart to remind Muichiro you're gone. A/N: I'm not too sure if the title means what I think it means so let me know if it's wrong...anyways I got the idea from a fic of @oceanxmoonz, so credits! Also you can probably tell I got lazy at the end... WARNINGS: (y/n) is dead. That's it.

“Where’s (y/n)?”

Shinobu’s smile was a little faker than before as she turned around to face the expectantly waiting Mist Pillar, who seemed a little upset. She couldn’t answer that quite yet. “Are you looking for them?”

“Yes,” Muichiro said plainly. “I couldn’t find them at all this morning. Or afternoon…have you seen them?”

Was it sadder to watch Muichiro lose his closest friend - if not something more - and grieve about it for a long time after or sadder to watch him forget they were long dead? That they weren’t avoiding him like his amnesia had him think, that they actually couldn’t? He always needed to be reminded and Shinobu didn’t like to be the one to do so.

“Tokito…they died a few months ago, remember?”

“No, they didn’t. Ginko would’ve told me.” His eyes widened, then narrowed angrily. “I don’t think that’s a very funny thing to say, Kocho.”

“But, Tokito-”

“I’ll go find (y/n) myself,” he said abruptly, then walked off.

Of course he came back later with the same question; of course Shinobu’s smile faltered.

***

“…I forgot your name.”

“…”

Muichiro blinked at the stoic Pillar before him. “You’re the…something Hashira, right? I think (y/n) mentioned you. Are they back from both of your mission yet?”

Tomioka hesitated. He was honest but he wasn’t cruel. He knew exactly what Tokito was talking about, knew that he suffered from huge blanks in his memory. He envied the younger Hashira a little, to be able to forget such tragedy - however seeing him constantly wander around wondering where they’d gone was a pitiful sight.

So in the end he decided to evade the question. “Yes. (y/n) came back safely from the mission.”

The Mist Pillar’s eyes lit up. “Thank you. I’ll go find them now.”

Yes, (y/n) came back from their mission together safely. If only the same could be said of the last.

***

“HAR?”

“I said, where’s (y/n)?” Muichiro sighed after his almost shout at the disbelieving Wind Pillar. “Has your mission damaged your ears?”

“You little-” Sanemi checked himself. “I know damn well what it was you said.”

“Okay then, where’s (y/n)? I found this flower I wanted to show them.”

The older man’s mouth fell open, probably to harshly remind Tokito for the fifth time that month that who he was looking for was long dead and gone. Then it closed again.

Sanemi was not a soft man, evidenced by his scars, shouts, and treatment of his younger brother. But at the end of the day his intentions, though misguided, were what he wanted best for everyone. It was a tragic world out there and whether his next words were going to exacerbate it he would accept the consequences whole-heartedly - no one would fault him for not wanting to bring the poor kid back to shattering reality either, right?

“Probably out on another mission. You can’t keep hogging them to yourself, Tokito.”

“That’s odd…I thought they just came back…”

“Yeah, well, demons don’t wait for anyone!” Sanemi barked. Sadly, too true.

***

“Oh, Tokito…!”

“…Kan-something-san?” Muichiro’s face twisted in confusion as the pink-haired lady threw herself at him crying, pulling him into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.” Mitsuri straightened and wiped at her face, plastering a bright but trembling smile for the younger Hashira.

Muichiro blinked. “Okay. Have you seen (y/n)? I just got back from a mission but I can’t find them.”

“…perhaps they’re busy?” Mitsuri swept the tears on her cheeks again. “Don’t worry, I don’t think they’d ignore if they had a choice, Tokito!”

“Oh…alright then.” Muichiro drifted off, readily accepting Mitsuri’s story despite the obvious holes for lack of better explanation.

Mitsuri bit her lip, guilty at her lie. Every day Muichiro would approach with the same question and every day someone or some way it would be broken to him that (y/n) was long gone but as terrible as it made her feel Mitsuri never wanted to be the one who did it.

He’d found the love she’d always been searching for. Unfortunate one didn’t survive for long.

***

“Young Tokito! Are you looking for someone?!”

“You’re really loud…” Muichiro tilted his head. “Have you seen (y/n)?”

Tengen and Rengoku shared a look - the Sound Pillar broke the pause first. “Tokito, don’t you remember?”

“Remember what?” Muichiro’s attention span was already running out. “I think I saw them today but I can’t remember where.”

“You couldn’t have seen them,” Tengen starts again, for it’s not the first time the Mist Pillar has mistaken someone else for (y/n). “They’re-”

“Oh, right…at the Butterfly Mansion, I think. Thanks for…helping?” Muichiro left and the two Pillars glanced at each other again.

“Who’s gonna tell him? He can’t keep walking around thinking they’re still alive. That’s just cruel.”

“But if he remembers his spirit will be beyond crushed - you remember how he was when he first found out. For now, when we need to be most vigilant, perhaps we should let him be!”

Rengoku’s voice carried a tremor of uncertainty, however.

***

“I saw Kanroji and you talk a few days ago. Did you make her cry?” Obanai glowered menacingly at the deadpan Mist Pillar.

“No? She was crying?”

“Yes!” Kaburamaru hissed with his owner.

“Oh…right. Now I remember. I didn’t make her cry.” Muichiro looked up. “At least I don’t think so?”

Obanai resisted the urge to slap his hand on his forehead. He leaned in clsoer. “Why was she crying?”

“I have no idea,” Muichiro said, leaning back. He brightened. “Oh, right. I was asking about (y/n).”

“(y/n)?” Obanai stiffened but took a step back. “Oh. I see.”

“Which reminds me…I wanted to go see her after our sparring, but I don’t know where they are.”

The Serpent Pillar and his snake shifted uncomfortably. “You’ll find them.”

Not really. Obanai hoped for the sake of his comrade that he’d forget he’d already asked the question and not stumble upon (y/n)’s grave.

***

Himejima too cried.

It didn’t really make sense to Muichiro, but he let the oldest Hashira lay a hand on his shoulder and say some prayers. He didn’t really pay attention to the wording but he caught his name and (y/n)’s.

It was safe to assume the Stone Hashira didn’t know where they were so Muichiro bid him goodbye (or at least he thought he did) and set off to go find them himself. From behind the trees one Shinazugawa Genya watched him go before joining his master’s side.

“Why isn’t anyone telling him?” Genya couldn’t imagine what it was like to lose someone so close to you, someone to love and care for, and not even remember when they were no longer there.

“Some things must be found out by himself.”

“Isn’t it unfair to (y/n)’s memory if Tokito doesn’t remember?”

“I’m sure (y/n) will understand…they were very patient with him. They will understand that he needs to take his own time in coming into terms with…”

“Coming into terms?” Genya’s frown deepened. “You mean it’s not just his memory thing?”

“Grief and denial are strange things.”

***

“Where are you, (y/n)?”

Muichiro knelt down by the headstone, dropping the bouquet next to him. “I hope you’re happy, wherever you are. I’m sorry I forgot about you for so long.”

He takes a deep breath and begins to tell about his day, like he’s been doing every day ever since he regained his memories after that fateful fight at the Swordsmith Village and befriending Tanjiro. He thinks they’d like this version of him much more.

“The demons have been awfully quiet lately,” Muichiro mused. “They say Kibutsuji’s planning something. They’re probably all out to get Nezuko. A big all out war’s going to be coming, I think, and I’m sorry I won’t be able to visit when that happens. So I’ll come more often now.”

He dusted off the stone, staring sadly at the inscription. “I’ll kill the demon who got you. I promise.”

At the price of his own life, (y/n) knew, sitting invisibly next to him, crying transparent tears but he wasn’t to know that.

[kikyoupdates]

Otherworldly Attraction ⭑˚🔮⭑ 𝑚𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑛

yandere!jjk x f!reader

yandere, reverse harem, isekai, jujutsu kaisen x fem!reader, slowburn, slowburn yandere

You don't know how or why, but you've been isekai'd into the world of Jujutsu Kaisen. Although your first instinct is to stay away from the plot, you've been blessed with an abnormal amount of cursed energy, and for better or worse, you find yourself sucked into the storyline. You decide that you may as well use your newfound powers for the greater good, and if you're lucky, you might succeed in rewriting some of the characters' fates. But it turns out that your presence in this world is an even bigger deal than you first thought, and soon, everyone wants to make you theirs.

previous | story masterlist | next

“Hehe.”   

You stare down at your brand-new selfie—taken with none other than Gojo Satoru . He’s smiling and posing while making peace signs with his fingers, and on your end, you’ve got a stupidly wide grin on your face, looking like you’ve just won the lottery. Which, in all fairness, you kind of did .   

“There you go,” Gojo hums, then he stops to cross his arms for a moment. “But why the selfie request all of a sudden? I’ll admit, I’m pretty popular in the world of jujutsu sorcerers, but you shouldn’t know about any of that.”   

“I don’t,” you nod. “I just think you’re really hot—I mean, really cool. Y-Yeah. You just seem really cool.”   

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Fushiguro staring at you in disgust.   

Goddammit. That dude must have an absolutely terrible impression of you so far.   

“Very true,” Gojo grins, swiping his hair back like some kind of L’Oréal shampoo model. “I am pretty cool, if I do say so myself.”   

Fushiguro looks even more disgusted now.   

Gojo claps his hands together. “Anyways! Time to head out. Take one last moment to make sure you’re not forgetting anything, because once we’re there, well… I can’t guarantee when you’ll be able to come back.”   

It’s a good thing your parents aren’t actual parents, because it’s safe to say that there’s no longer anything tying you to this place. Of course, you’re terrified of what the future may hold, but you made the decision to be brave, and to try to help people in the process. If you play your cards right, maybe lives can be spared. Maybe not everyone has to die.   

So, yeah. You’re ready to leave. You’re ready to start this new chapter.   

And you also now have a selfie with Gojo Satoru. So far, life is pretty good.   

The trip to Tokyo takes a couple hours by train, but fortunately, you’ve got Itadori to keep you company the whole time. You try to engage Fushiguro in conversation as well, but he mostly keeps to himself and just stares out the window without saying anything. It doesn’t help that he’s clearly suspicious of you, but whatever. Not much you can do about it right now.   

Some time passes, and eventually, you reach your destination. Fushiguro separates from the group and goes off on his own to receive treatment for his injuries, so you’re left behind with Gojo and Itadori as you venture further into the mountains. 

“I can’t believe this is really Tokyo,” Itadori marvels.  

“Even Tokyo’s like this on the outskirts,” Gojo brushes off. “More importantly, Yuji, you’ve got an interview with the principal right away. If you mess up, you might get rejected, so do your best, okay? No pressure.”   

“Huh? Does that mean I’ll get executed right away?!”   

“What a disappointment. So, you’re not even the leader?”   

A familiar voice. You freeze up at the sound of it, unsurprised to find Sukuna’s mouth on the side of Itadori’s cheek. A partial manifestation, or whatever the hell you might call that. Either way, it gives you the creeps.   

“A hierarchy not based purely on strength is boring, if you ask me,” Sukuna chuckles.   

Itadori slaps his palm over his cheek in a hurry to shut Sukuna up. “Sorry about that. He pops out sometimes. I can’t always help it.”  

Unfortunately, Sukuna refuses to disappear, and this time, he manifests on the back of Itadori’s hand instead.   

“You really did a number on me earlier. I’m letting you know right now. Once I make this boy’s body completely mine, you’ll be the first one I kill!”   

That stinky old bastard is just running his mouth (quite literally), so you’re not really fazed.   

At least, not until he turns his attention to you.  

“And you ,” Sukuna mutters. “The strange girl. You never answered my question before. What are you? What in the world is going on with your cursed energy? It’s bothersome. Hurry up and give me a straight answer, or you’ll regret it.”   

“Ugh, again ?” Itadori fumes, stomping his foot in frustration. “Go away, already! You’re so annoying! And leave [Name] alone!”   

Fortunately, Itadori manages to fully suppress him this time, putting an end to Sukuna’s incessant yapping. Dude is seriously in love with the sound of his own voice.   

Unfortunately, Gojo already heard everything he said loud and clear.   

“Sukuna appears to have a fixation on you,” Gojo remarks, pressing his hand to his chin. “Well, I guess it’s not really that surprising, considering the ridiculous amount of cursed energy you’re constantly emitting. It’s obvious that you’re not a sorcerer because you don’t seem to know how to control it, but in terms of sheer capacity, it far surpasses that of an ordinary human.”   

“N-Neat,” you reply stupidly.   

Gojo stares at you for a few moments, then throws his head back and starts laughing.   

“Haha! Sure, I guess you could call it that. Being strong is pretty neat, without a doubt. I was going to say how honored I am to be the target of Ryomen Sukuna, but it looks like he’s even more interested in you, so you’ve got me beat in that regard.”   

“I’m not honored at all. I want nothing to do with that nasty guy.”   

Gojo laughs again. “Yeah, I bet. I can only imagine how confused you must be right now. Not to mention freaked out.”   

“So, is Sukuna really that famous?” Itadori asks.   

“Yes,” Gojo nods. “Ryomen Sukuna. He’s a demon of lore with four arms and two faces. But the truth is that he was actually a human who existed, although it was well over a thousand years ago. In the golden age of jujutsu, sorcerers gathered up all their might to challenge him, but ultimately, they failed to defeat him entirely. Crowned with the title of Sukuna, we couldn’t even destroy his grave wax, and he thus traversed the ages after his death as a cursed object. Without a doubt, he is the King of Curses.”   

“So, who’s stronger, you or him?”   

“Hm. Well, if Sukuna were to regain all his power, then it’d probably be pretty draining.”   

“Would you lose?”   

Gojo slows his steps for a moment, then tilts his head towards both of you, a cocky grin plastered across his lips.   

“Nah,” he chuckles. “I’d win.”   

Oh my god. I really got to see him deliver that iconic line. And he looked hot as hell while doing it.   

You stare at him with hearts in your eyes, already in full fangirl mode (which is pretty much your default mode, to be fair), but Gojo beckons the two of you onwards before you can get lost in your thoughts.   

He leads you inside one of the buildings, where you’re greeted by a familiar face.   

“You’re late, Satoru. Eight minutes late. Not quite enough to chastise you for, but I thought I told you to fix that bad habit of yours.”  

It’s the principal, of course—Yaga Masamichi. He’s currently in the middle of crafting a new puppet, and he’s also got more than a handful of them already surrounding him. At first glance, they’re adorable, but you know that their appearance is awfully deceptive, and they’re a lot stronger than they look.   

Poor Itadori’s about to get bitch-slapped by one of those puppets soon.   

“That old dude’s randomly making really cute stuff,” Itadori whispers in your ear.   

“If it’s not enough for you to get mad about, then cut me some slack, will ya?” Gojo sighs. “I figured you’d just be making your dolls anyway. Eight minutes is no big deal.”   

Principal Yaga gestures towards Itadori. “That’s him, right? Sukuna’s vessel. And the girl beside him… must be the other student you mentioned. The one with the abnormal amount of cursed energy.”   

“My name is Itadori Yuji!” your friend introduces, bowing his head in a hurry. “I like girls like Jennifer Lawrence! It’s nice to meet you!”   

Shit. Is it my turn now?   

“I-I’m [Last Name] [Name],” you say, bowing as well. “And I like, um… I guess I like cool guys. Like Gojo. And funny guys, like Ryan Reynolds. I also think Timothée Chalamet is pretty cute—”   

“Stop, stop.” Principal Yaga presses a palm to his forehead and exhales loudly. “I never asked either of you to start listing your personal preferences. Cut it out, already. And why was Satoru’s name randomly thrown in there?”   

“I can’t help that I’m extremely cool,” Gojo shrugs.   

“Satoru, that’s enough out of you. More importantly, why did you come here?” Principal Yaga asks, now addressing Itadori.   

Itadori looks confused, of course. “Uh… I came here for an interview. I’m pretty sure.”   

“But why Jujutsu High?”   

“To learn… jujutsu? And stuff?”   

“I mean beyond that. What do you hope to find once you’ve studied curses and learned how to exorcize them?”   

This time, Itadori glances towards you, almost as if he’s seeking some kind of guidance. “Beyond that…? Well, I mean, I’m gonna collect all of Sukuna’s remaining fingers. It’s dangerous to just leave them as is.”   

“But why ?” Principal Yaga presses.   

Gojo chuckles and taps you on the shoulder. “This is probably going to go on for a little while. Come. Let’s go wait over there. The principal likes to ramble every now and then.”   

You offer Itadori an encouraging smile. You obviously know what comes next, but that also means that you have full confidence in him. You know that he’ll pass Principal Yaga’s test and get accepted into Jujutsu High. It doesn’t seem you’ll be put through any interviews yourself… probably because you’re not Sukuna’s vessel, but you expect that most people are probably going to be pretty wary of you anyway. Since you’re an anomaly and all that. And since Sukuna couldn’t keep his stupid mouth shut.   

So, you watch. You watch as Itadori gets smacked around by one of Principal Yaga’s puppets, all the while having to answer the questions he keeps throwing at him nonstop. It’s definitely not fun to have to see your friend get beat up, but again, thanks to the knowledge you have of this world, you’re not worried. And it’s certainly not like anyone’s life is at risk right now.   

That won’t always be the case, though.   

“You pass,” Principal Yaga eventually states, and he cracks a small smile, even offering Itadori his hand so that he can stand up.   

Itadori smiles back at him. “Thank you. It’s nice to properly meet—”   

He promptly gets pummeled by the puppet again.   

“Oops,” Principal Yaga mumbles. “Sorry. I forgot to stop the incantation.”  

“Looks like everything went well,” Gojo muses. He peers down at you curiously. “But I have to admit, I’m a bit surprised. You didn’t look concerned at all. Weren’t you worried that he’d fail? In which case that would mean that his execution date would be pushed up.”  

You shake your head. “I believe in Itadori. I knew he’d be able to pull it off. And… I believe in you too, sensei. You said you’re the one that convinced the higher-ups in the first place, right? I can tell that you’ll protect Itadori. You wouldn’t let him be executed. I trust you completely.”  

You grin ear-to-ear, and even though you can’t see it, Gojo’s eyes briefly widen, underneath his black blindfold. Of course, it’s not the first time people have relied on him. Being the strongest jujutsu sorcerer there is, it comes with the territory. But it’s strange that you’re already willing to put your full faith in him, despite not knowing anything of this new realm you’ve just ventured into.   

Admittedly, it’s rather endearing.  

“You’re exactly right,” Gojo chuckles, reaching out to gently pat your head. “Leave it all to me. I don’t intend to let any of my students get hurt on my watch. It’ll probably all seem overwhelming at first, but you won’t be alone. I promise.”   

Gojo Satoru is patting my head! %$%^*@^$!*!  

Your brain short-circuits for a few moments, and you briefly think that, honestly, you could probably die happy right now.   

Itadori approaches you while you’re still stuck in fangirl mode, and fortunately, you snap out of it in time to congratulate him for passing the principal’s test. Meanwhile, Gojo and Principal Yaga step off to the side.   

“The boy is one thing, but the girl, [Name],” Principal Yaga frowns. “I’ve never come across cursed energy like hers before. And you say that Sukuna himself expressed interest in her?”   

Gojo nods. “It’s even weirder than no one’s noticed her before. With that kind of energy, you would think she’d have stood out a long time ago. But she clearly hasn’t been trained in the ways of jujutsu. It’s almost like she sprung up one day, completely out of nowhere. But surely that kind of cursed energy can’t just randomly appear on the spot. It would make sense if she’d been born with this kind of power and had cultivated it over the years. Do you think it’s possible one of the great clans have been hiding her all this time?”  

“I suppose we can’t rule it out, but it wouldn’t make any sense. If that were the case, she would surely have been trained from a young age.”  

“Well, we’ll just have to look into it, I guess. It’s fine. Better to have her nearby so we can keep an eye on her. I knew from the moment I saw her that I couldn’t just let her go.”   

Gojo stares at you from afar, watching as you and Itadori happily converse. The two of you are so carefree and innocent. You have yet to be exposed to the horrors that the world of jujutsu has to offer. He knows he won’t be able to spare either of you from the bitter reality of things, but all the same, he’s going to fight for your futures.  

After a brief pause, Gojo smiles, then claps his hand together.   

“Alright! With that out of the way, let me show you guys to your dorms.”

“Perfect!” Itadori grins, stepping back to admire his handiwork. Namely, the giant poster of Jennifer Lawrence he just put up on the wall. “Man, these dorms are huge, huh? I wasn’t expecting us to have so much space!”   

“They’re nice,” you agree. “My new dorm is even bigger than my bedroom.”   

Both in this world, and back in the real world.   

“I’m just relieved I was able to make it through the principal’s interview. I wasn’t expecting those dolls of his to come to life! That was pretty crazy, huh?”   

“Y-Yeah. Who could’ve seen that one coming…?”   

“Anyways, Gojo was saying they’re gonna need me to help locate the rest of Sukuna’s fingers,” Itadori continues, adjusting the poster slightly. “‘Cause I’m not just a vessel, but some kind of radar, too. Honestly, I don’t get what’s happening with my body, but I guess there’s not much I can do about it at this point. I really don’t think Sukuna’s gonna cooperate, though. I doubt we’ll be able to come to an agreement that easily.”   

“I’m sure he wants to find the rest of his fingers, because he’s trying to regain his full strength. There’s no way he’d miss out on an opportunity to become more powerful. But… yeah. Be careful,” you nod gravely. “He definitely can’t be trusted.”   

“Why’s he so obsessed with you, anyway? Everyone keeps going on about how you have a whole bunch of cursed energy. Have you always been able to see curses and stuff?”   

“Uh…”   

You’re not sure how to respond. Technically, yes , as in, you’ve been able to see them from the moment you materialized in this world, but you’ve only been here for a solid few weeks. Perhaps you’re better off being honest this time.   

“Only recently,” you admit. “I think I started being able to see them roughly a few weeks ago. I noticed them right about when I transferred into our old high school. There were a couple of small curses hanging around and clinging to people from time to time. But I thought I was going crazy, so I didn’t mention it to anyone.”  

“Damn. That must have been scary. Oh,” he realizes. “Is that why you said you weren’t interested in joining the Occult Club? Because of all the weird stuff you kept seeing?”   

“Um, pretty much. I wasn’t sure whether or not it was all in my head, but I kind of wanted to keep my distance, just to be on the safe side. Sorry. I would’ve been upfront from the start, but… obviously, it’s a bit hard to believe. Especially since you weren’t able to see the curses with your own eyes.”   

Itadori smiles. “You don’t have to apologize. I get that you must have had a lot on your mind, and you’re right that it’d be a pretty difficult topic to bring up. Anyways, don’t worry! I’ll keep Sukuna away from you. It sounds like things are gonna get pretty complicated, but I’m gonna collect all those fingers so that no one else has to get hurt. Including you.”   

“Are you saying you’ll protect me?” you chuckle.   

“Of course! If you ever get scared, don’t hesitate to use me as a shield!”   

Itadori proudly flexes his bicep, and you giggle in response. You have no doubts that he’ll be looking after you along the way, because that’s just the kind of guy he is, but hopefully… you’ll be able to protect him too. You’d like to make his painful life at least a little bit easier.   

“By the way, you asked Gojo for a selfie earlier. I didn’t realize you liked him that much. I guess he is pretty cool, objectively speaking.” Itadori scrunches up his brows. “Is he the kind of guy girls are usually into?”   

“I think it depends. Girls like all kinds of guys. Especially strong, caring guys like you,” you grin.   

You were just being honest and trying to hype him up a bit. Itadori’s a friendly, extroverted guy, after all. You don’t even remember him ever looking embarrassed when you first watched the anime.  

Which is why you’re surprised to see him blushing.  

“R-Really?” he chuckles awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck. “I feel like you’re just saying that. But thanks! I appreciate it. While we’re on the topic, I bet most guys would have a crush on you , [Name]! Because you’re so pretty and nice!”   

If there was water in your mouth, you would have probably spat it out right about now.   

You start melting into a little puddle of embarrassment, but thankfully, Fushiguro steps into the room and saves you from some of the humiliation.  

“You guys are so loud,” he grumbles. “And seriously, why’d they put you next door to me? There are a bunch of empty rooms to choose from.”   

“Oh, hey, Fushiguro!” Itadori waves. “Glad to see you look better now. Also, Gojo was saying it’d be more lively and fun if all our dorms were close by.”   

“Classes and missions are more than enough,” Fushiguro mutters, rolling his eyes in annoyance. He stops just in front of you, and of course, that crease in between his brows deepens.  

You strain a smile. “Um… yes? Is there something you wanted to say to me?”   

“Not really. You’re just kind of confusing, if I’m being honest. And you’re weirdly obsessed with Gojo.”   

“Only because he’s hot,” you protest. “I mean—dammit! Because he’s cool ! I like him because he’s cool, okay?!”   

Fushiguro makes no effort to hide his disapproval, and you let out a heavy sigh, eventually hanging your head in defeat. It’s no surprise he doesn’t trust you yet. Your circumstances are far from ordinary, and you even told Itadori outright to eat Sukuna’s finger. If you were in his position, you’d probably have your doubts too.  

Itadori taps both you and Fushiguro on the shoulders. “Hey, guys. [Name]’s selfie with Gojo earlier got me thinking. Now that we’re all gonna be classmates and dorm buddies, we should commemorate this with a photo or something. Right?”   

“I like that idea,” you smile.   

“I don’t ,” Fushiguro grimaces.  

“Okay, let’s all take a selfie together!” Itadori exclaims, and he proceeds to pull you and Fushiguro close—despite the latter’s protests—then he uses your phone to snap a picture of all three of you.   

Just like that, you have a new picture saved. Fushiguro is scowling irritably, of course, and your smile looks a little dorky because it all happened so spur-of-the-moment, but you decide that it’s good as it is. It makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.   

“I like this picture even more than the one I took with Gojo,” you beam. “I’m gonna make it my lock screen right now.”   

Fushiguro blinks. He wasn’t expecting such a bright, infectious smile. It’s just a selfie. Is it really worth making such a big deal over? He’s not sure why, but something about your expression makes it difficult for him to maintain his grumpy demeanor.   

Even though he doesn’t really want to admit it… you’re kind of cute.   

More chapters are available on Quotev and Ao3!

⊱.⋅follow + post notifications on for story update announcements or join the author's discord!⋅.⊰

🔮 main masterlist! ♡ oneshot masterlist

[loveyouprongs]

melting into you

grumpy sirius black x fem!reader

upcoming content: fluff, mentions of massages, mary is kinda a mean girl (sorry!) but only for two sentences

authors note: my first time writing for sirius and i kind of hateeee this but i also wanted to put it out anyway! despite any photos used in the header, it’s important that people of all races can identify with my work so please let me know if any of the descriptive language i use is exclusionary, i’m trying my best!

word count: 3k

masterlist

the chatter of the crowded pub immediately enveloped sirius as he stepped through the door. his body couldn’t decide if the various, loud voices were grating on him or if he was relieved to be able to get lost in the sea of bodies and finally relax after the long day he had. he glanced around the room, eyes falling on his group of friends all sat at their usual table in the corner. a seat was left empty, assumedly for him, and his gut twisted with something unidentifiable (or at least something he was trying very hard not to identify) when he saw your figure in the chair beside it.

you were a friend of james’ from work. well, near james’ work. you owned a little massage parlor, set up right across the street from the rugby field james’ trains at. sirius still remembers the day james first discovered you. james had practically melted into the bar stool, a dopey smile gracing his face.

“you look particularly happy after a day of training, mate,” remus remarked. james did nothing but let out an angelic sigh.

“alert the media lads, i can confirm heaven is real because i was just there,” james exclaimed.

“what the fuck are you on about?” sirius asked, not used to james’ relaxed state, it was… off putting. james was always either full of energy, or absolutely exhausted (from burning off said energy). sirius couldn’t remember the last time he saw his friend so at peace.

“this girl-” james started,

“i hope you showered before you came here then,” sirius quipped.

“not like that you dolt,” james remarked, “this masseuse, more like an angel, she just opened up a practice down the street from the field and my back was fucking aching after practice today so i popped in, and UGH,” james let out an almost pornographic sigh, attracting the attention of the other bar patrons.

“she couldn’t have been that good,” remus said.

“oh, but she is! i already scheduled weekly appointments with her! you guys should check her out, she’s really nice too.”

sirius rolled his eyes, “i think i’ll pass on some middle aged lady rubbing lavender on me, thanks, though.”

“she’s not middle aged, she’s our age! and you could do with some relaxation pads, you’re so bloody tense all the time. remus, you should give her a call,” james said, handing remus a pale purple business card, “she can help you with your joint pain.”

remus looked down at the card skeptically, he’d tried every single ointment, doctor, treatment, you name it, to help fix his, as his friends so nicely called it, “old man bones”, and nothing. but james was looking at remus with wide, pleading eyes and remus conceded, tucking the card into his pocket.

a week later, sirius, james, and everyone were hanging out at lily and marlene’s flat. “where’s remus? i thought he was coming with you,” lily asked sirius.

“beats me, i tried calling him twice this past hour, went straight to voicemail.”

“i know where he is,” james sung.

“oh yeah, where?” lily challenged.

“getting a massage!”

“james, no one likes massages other than you, and it’s becoming creepy,” sirius remarked.

“i don’t care! i bet you fifty, no one hundred, no two hundred pounds, when moony gets here, he’ll be singing her praises!”

“you can find out now,” lily said, as remus stumbled into the living room, the same dopey smile on his face that was on james’ last week.

“no way you went to james’ hippie-dippie massage place,” sirius said, the vanilla aroma coming off remus’ body already wafting through his nose.

“i feel amazing,” remus slurred, flopping onto the couch.

“jesus, you’re acting drunk!” marlene said, a disbelieving smile on her face.

“i feel drunk! like a jellyfish that’s had too much champagne, who can float around the ocean without a care in the world” remus said, staring into space, his grin practically splitting his face.

“i told you! she’s the best, i don’t know how she does it.”

lily and marlene started talking about going to see these “magic hands” for themselves and sirius just grumbled, sinking further into the couch watching remus roll around on the couch like a cat basking in a warm spot of sunlight, and even sirius couldn’t stop his smile, seeing his usually achy and in pain friend so at peace. even if he did look like a drunk jellyfish.

since then, everyone of james’ friends and family have had a session with you, each feeling so much better, physically, and thought you were the nicest girl this side of the city, so when james’ suggested inviting you to pub trivia one night, there were no objections. that night you floated in, a shimmery blue top and long white skirt donning your frame as you greeted everyone, but most you were already familiar with, except for sirius. and unluckily for you, you caught him on a bad day. a really bad day. his head was pounding and ears were ringing from already pulling a double at work, and frankly the scent of eucalyptus that clouded you was making him nauseous.

“hi sirius, it’s nice to meet you,” you spoke softly, the sound of your voice soothing his pounding head involuntarily. he responded with a not friendly, but not unfriendly hum of acknowledgement.

“i fear i don’t know anything about these categories,” you continued, looking at the blackboard above the bar that marked the trivia.

“bad day for you to join us then,” sirius said, and he expected you to take the hint but you just laughed, a tinkling tune floating through the air.

“oi, no it’s not! don’t listen to him, he’s just in a mood,” james assured, glaring at his always grumpy friend.

“i suppose you’re right,” you replied to sirius, your calm smile never faltering despite the now awkward air.

“we lose about half the time anyway,” remus spoke and your eyes visibility relaxed at the outward friendliness.

“oh right! didn’t you tell me that most of your back pain came from carrying the team?”

the group let out an echo of “heys!” at your question to which remus only laughed, “exactly.”

“how are you feeling anyway?”

“much better, that thing you did with my lower back, it really helped.”

“i’m glad,” you responded sweetly, and sirius again felt a pang of gratefulness flow through him towards you, for the relief you brought his best mate. only to be quickly drowned out by the annoyance of the day heightened, multiplied, by your and james’ exuberant energies. both loud, giggly, and for some reason every missed answer that you took in stride, rubbed sirius the wrong way. and don’t even get him started on the adorable ridiculous outfits you wore, made up of colors he’s never even seen before. so as you became a regular in their friend group, he kept his distance. you were nice enough, he’ll give that to you. always saying hello to him and asking how he’s doing, offering him a spot at your practice any time -to which he always declined- despite his standoffish behavior towards you. he already had a james, he didn’t need his twin, he didn’t think he could take it. your seemingly endless energy, joy, ability to talk, so the two of you just never grew close like you did with everyone else.

this didn’t stop the yearning, stomach twisting, desire to awaken whenever you were near. at first sirius thought he was sick. but one night when you were telling a story about an older man you were treating who fell asleep during your session, sirius couldn’t help but bark out a laugh and the pure happiness in your gaze made his heart melt instantly. oh, no. sirius thought, and immediately trained his face back into a neutral expression. but it wasn’t fast enough for james to miss it.

“so, i noticed something tonight,” james said as the two stood on the balcony, each nursing a cig.

“good for you, jamesy, tomorrow go for two things,” sirius replied with a smirk.

“hmm, funny. but i noticed how a certain someone was looking at a certain someone else.”

sirius didn’t dignify him with a response.

“oh, come on padfoot. it’s so obvious that you like her,” james goaded. sirius shot him a look that he hoped was indifference, but he could tell james could see the fear in it. the fear over if he really was being obvious, the fear of being vulnerable.

“i mean, obvious to me, she still thinks you don’t like her a bit,” james responded.

“i like her just fine.”

“i think it’s a little more than that, don’t you?”

“i don’t know what you’re making up in your head,” sirius snapped, taking a long drag, letting the smoke warm his nose as he blew it out.

“okay, so i’m just imagining all your lingering glances at her when she isn’t looking -and you called me a creep when i first met her, might i remind you!- and how you always get extra grumpy when some bloke chats her up at the pub.”

“i do not!” sirius retorted childishly. it was annoying, okay? how you would stand at the edge of the bar, waiting patiently to order a round for the table and men would just flock to you like moths to a flame. sirius couldn’t help but roll his eyes at their corny (and horny) pick up lines, to which you were always too nice about in response. he didn’t understand why someone would put up with that, but you never say an unkind word. it was annoying for that reason, only.

james sighed, stamping out his cigarette, “you just need to let yourself be happy, man, i think you would be really good together,” and with that james went back inside, the sliding glass door not closing soon enough for sirius to not catch your enchanting, tinkling, laugh.

back in the present, sirius let out a sigh, steeling himself for the night. “you made it!” james cried, throwing a tipsy arm around sirius as he sat down.

“happy birthday prongs, packed house, tonight,” sirius said, looking around the table that was more than just his usual friends, peter, thomas, and mary, all here, too. he felt a slight scowl creep up his face, he wasn’t the biggest fan of peter or thomas, and even more so wasn’t so fond of mary. he remembered back in school, she could always be a little stuck up. but she was the only one who could match sirius when it came to alcohol, so she wasn’t so bad to have around for a drink.

“hey sirius,” you spoke softly, your temple resting against your fist.

“hello,” he said back, letting his eyes quickly dance over your form. you were wearing a poofy pink dress that fell to about mid thigh, making you look kind of like a cupcake with legs. he’d love a taste. the thought entered his mind as quickly as he forced it away. the skirt of your dress partially covering a white bag crumpled under your thigh and being squeezed tight with your other hand.

sirius had an array of ready to go answers on the tip of his tongue for your inevitable asking of how his day went. “it was fine.” “not so bad.” “long.” but the question never came. you were staring at the large television screen playing an old recording of a rugby game from the eighties.

“didn’t know you were into rugby,” sirius murmured and it took you a few seconds to realize he was speaking to you.

“oh! oh, not so much, but this one is quite interesting,” you responded simply, eyes shifting back to the screen.

you regularly annoyed sirius, that part was true, but this time it was different. why were you acting so strange? how come the fruity drink in front of you was seemingly untouched? it wasn’t like you to be so… silent.

as the night went by, sirius grew more agitated. did some bloke take it a step too far before he got there? you were definitely present in the conversations being held around the table, never one to be rude, but you didn’t join in like you usually would and sirius noticed you were chewing your bottom lip almost bloody.

“is she your girlfriend or something, sirius?” mary asked as sirius was hanging by the bar, waiting for the boys and his drinks to be ready, eyes still fixed on you as he watched you listen intently to james’ story, the regular glimmer in your eye gone.

“what?” sirius responded, unsure as to when mary even showed up.

“that girl, you keep staring at her,” she said, lips wrapping around her straw as she also cast a glance at you, giving you the once over.

“no. no, she’s not my girlfriend.”

“i figured, i would’ve been really surprised had you said yes,” mary said with a laugh.

“and why’s that?” he hoped the defensiveness in his tone wasn’t noticeable.

a short laugh escaped her, “it would be like dating a child! james meets the oddest people, doesn’t he? before you got here, she was wearing this hat that was quite literally a birthday cake sprouting from her head, oh my god sirius you would’ve died laughing!”

sirius felt a simmering heat rise in his chest. your slumped posture and wilted disposition, the thought that someone was mean to your face, mean enough to make you clammer into a shell he didn’t even know you had.

“bring the drinks over won’t you, mary?” sirius tossed a few pounds on the bar and made his way over to you without looking back.

sirius halted as he stopped right at you, his tall body looming over yours. his feet must have moved faster than his brain because he had no idea what to say to you now, but you hadn’t noticed him there anyway, still absentmindedly nodding along to whatever the group was talking about, leg bouncing anxiously under the table, hand white knuckling what sirius assumed was the hat mary made you feel bad about.

“oi!” he let out, causing you to flinch looking up at him with wide eyes. nice going.

“sor-sorry,” he cleared his throat, “um,”

“are you alright, sirius?” when you say his name he loves the way it sounds.

“yes, i’m alright,” sirius said, soft in a way you didn’t even know could come from him.

you blinked up at him, eyes wide like you were looking at him from inside a fishbowl. “well… that’s good,” you said in response with a slight smile, confused as to why he suddenly started talking to you.

“don’t listen to mary, alright.”

“w-what?”

sirius sighed and plopped himself back into his seat next to yours, and it took everything in you to not look at how his black jeans hugged his thighs, or get lost in the earthy cologne he always wore. you had no clue why sirius and you didn’t click- and some days it irked you to no end, you had been nothing but kind to him, almost desperate for him to

shoot that charming, intoxicating smirk your way- but it seemed he never thought of you twice. (that still didn’t stop your thoughts from wandering to him and what the heat of his body would feel like if you were pressed against his side late at night under the covers.)

“don’t listen to her, okay? can’t stand to see you so… melancholy… its proper annoying,” he muttered, avoiding eye contact. both of you had heated cheeks.

“i’m not melancholy, sirius. i’m just glad i didn’t make a fool out myself,” you laughed awkwardly.

sirius rolled his eyes and twisted so he faced directly towards you, inadvertently caging you in his legs. your dusty pink flowing over his dark denim.

you felt your breath escape you as he fixed you with a look you’d never seen before, his brown eyes swallowing you completely. “you care too much about what people think,” he said astutely.

“what?” you sputtered.

“you need to toughen up.”

“o-okay?”

“you can’t- you can’t just let people push you around or make you feel badly about yourself.” sirius had no idea where he was going with this.

“i- i don’t feel badly about myself,” he could see right through you.

“oh sure, then why have you been sitting here all slumped over and mopey then?”

“i haven’t been mopey!”

“hmph! you literally look like fucking eeyore right now,” sirius quipped with a huff, his natural, sarcastic demeanor coming back to him, coated in flirtation?

you couldn’t hold back a laugh, leaning further into him, “well we wouldn’t want that, now would we?” you asked quietly, biting your lip.

“no. no we wouldn’t. but its too late now,” sirius said, reaching over your leg and snatching the crocheted hat out from under your leg.

“oh!”

sirius shook it out with flare and shoved it on his head, absolutely fueled with glee over making you smile, not having it in him to resist anymore.

“the birthday cake is mine, you’ll have to find your own.”

“you-look-a-maz-ing,” you said, each syllable punctuated by uncontrollable laughter.

“pads!” james gasped with a drunken squeal.

“what?” he grumbled, turning to his friend, his grumpy temperament back as if it never left, but it was impossible to take him seriously with the bright pink, triple tiered cake sitting on his head and his cheeks ruddy with blossoming, crackling chemistry.

“i’m the birthday boy! that should be mine!” james cried, flailing arms reaching to rip it off his head.

“not a chance, potter!” sirius declared, confidently throwing his arm around the back of your chair. he could feel you watching him from the corner of his eye and with wonderment you leaned further into the crook of his arm.

“sorry jamesie, i’ll crochet you your own, promise!”

[blueishspace]

Hero, Villain God 25

(Prev) (Next) (First)

*Grian's pov*

You look at her... waiting... she said it was complicated... you have no idea what that would even mean in this context.

"Well, I'm listening."

She waves in the air dismissively.

"... Yeah, yeah... I have to say that It happened for two reasons mostly...even then though...gross oversimplification"

"Oh?"

"As the goddess of wisdom I see things even you don't. Or maybe saying I notice things is more correct"

"I doubt it"

"Do you want me to explain or?"

"Right, sorry Pearl, go on"

"Have you seen the hero association? Looked at their behavior? The one here in Hermmittopia is not unique in It's corruption and treatment of heroes but trust me... it's really bad"

You get that much.

"... Yeah, when I inteviewed they ask me how I fit the brand. A bit cringe of them."

"Yes ... Cunts, all of them."

She huffs as she looks away.

"So what? Did you become a villain to stop them?"

"I did not choose to become a villain, I started as a vigilante but they named me a villain for messing up too many of their dealings... I decided to stick with it, the fearsome reputation gives a lot of possibilities."

"And vigilantism and villainy is the only way?"

"Are you really asking me that Grian?"

"Oh, Not judging by the way, my reasons are far less noble no matter how you spin it ... Guess I'm just curious."

"You really are prideful aren't you?"

...huh? That was just out of nowhere! You don't get why she would even say that.

"Do you really think only you can handle more then one identity?"

"Oh... So you are doing like me aren't you!? How exciting!"

"Heh, you could say that mate... Though not nearly as many as you... I do actually have some amount of sanity"

The two of you look to eachother in silence for a few seconds, it is weirdly tranquil here in this place, Pearl's domain is not somewhere you are used to be in...wisdom and chaos don't really mesh well and you can feel it even with her holding the worst of it back. Let's just get this done with so you can go.

"And the second?"

"... The second reason, yes"

"I'm guessing you are less proud of this one, I can tell by the voice."

"You could say that, villainy is a good way to deal with a certain rage."

... You don't remember Pearl having anger problems, quite the opposite really, as the goddess of wisdom you thought she would be really hard to anger.

"Anger? That's...new?"

"The corruption of the blood god, it seems one can cure it only so many times before they themselves become the target"

The blood god corrupted her? She doesn't look like most corrupted beings, she seems pretty aware and not murderous.

"... Bloodlust?"

"Yes ... I can hold it back most of the time but I need to let it out at times or it might bottle up and eventually explode out"

You sit back, you do have a question. Well, you have a bunch of questions really but you'll start with one... For now at least, that might change later.

"But why have you not cured yourself like you do to others? Isn't that like your whole thing? Curing the blood curse?"

"I can't... The curse takes hold every time I try... When that happens, or whenever the hunger wins... I have named that me Scarlet Pearl... I really hope you don't have to meet her."

You don't mind violence, you doubt it would end up badly for you either way.

"Oh I disagree, I'm sure we would get along great"

"Don't even joke about it"...

"Why have you not contacted the older gods? Like me?"

"You can't cure something like this and when I asked Life she wasn't able to do much...only Time and Order could do something and they will not intervene with the natural course of events. You know that even more then I."

"That's...true."

The two of you spend some time in the garden of wisdom, recounting the last few hundreds years to eachother...you do skip over a bunch though, you don't enjoy being here... You have never been paricularly close with Santa Perla, you have barely interacted really, but you suppose you are in this together now...It's... Well, you'll see how it goes. You want to say something but you are beat to it by her.

"I think we should return to the mortal plane"

It's like she read your mind, or maybe she did, who knows.

"Yeah..."

And like that you are in the alleyway and she is gone, left behind is a phone number written on a piece of paper.

It seems your civilian identity is going to meet someone new pretty soon.

[risingphoenix24601]

Why (stage) Nessa is Ableist: An Essay

Disclaimer: I am disabled, but not a wheelchair user. I am chronically ill (EDS + all the bs that comes with it) and neurodivergent (ADHD, SPD, awaiting an Autism eval).

I will start with my personal perspective. My gripe with Nessa is that she is spoiled, her father favors her, and she expects everything to be done for her and soaks up everyone's pity. I'm not saying this never happens, but I feel like a lot of people just assume our parents coddle us and that our lives are easier, as if being disabled is some sort of advantage, and I've even seen us represented as going around looking for people entrap into helping us. When I was in high school, some kids found out I had a 504, became jealous (bruh, I'm jealous that you were born with high-speed internet brains) immediately assumed I was an arrogant prick who thought I deserved "special treatment," and took it upon themselves to make sure I felt like a burden. Believe me, being born into a world that doesn't know you exist is NOT an advantage.

Getting into more specific stuff: the movie did a great job correcting this, but since I'm talking about the stage version, I'm just going to list it: Elphaba's going to school just to care for Nessa, but I don't think she's in a position where she would need a full-time care-taker, so there's the trope of us entrapping people to do our bidding and that we're burdens on others (movie made clear that the dad is the asshole here and not Nessa). Second, many characters, some of whom don't know her at all, wheel Nessa around. You NEVER touch a person's mobility aids without their permission. Again, move fixed this. Third, Nessa says to Elphaba "I'm about the first happy night of my life!" Don't get me wrong, having a disability can really suck, but it doesn't mean our only emotion is misery. Plenty of disabled people live meaningful, fulfilling lives. My uncle has commented to me that he'd never guess I'm sick because "those people usually go around with a scowl." My uncle is Vietnam war vet. I'm sure if I knew half of the hell he went through, I would be shocked that he doesn't walk around with a scowl either-- but life goes on.

I'm going to address the controversy of the cure in Act II. Let me make this clear: plenty of disabled people want to be cured, and portraying someone who wants to be cured is not problematic. What is problematic, however, is that this is a very complicated topic and the show presents it in a way that is very simple. I'll use myself as an example: I would cure my EDS in a heartbeat, but neurodivergence, I honestly don't know. I am now at a point where I don't hate myself and actually like the way I am, but there are still days that I wish I was normal. I don't view my neurodivergence as a "gift" or another way of being, it is a disability and my life is harder because of it. And yet, I would be a completely different person without it. And I'm not sure if that's a person who I'd want to be.

We must remember that Nessa has been disabled since birth, this is her normal. And more than that, it's part of who she is. Suddenly being able to walk would be a massive change, and not necessarily a welcome one-- I think she would have the same fears that I have regarding fixing my neurodivergence. I also don't think Nessa is in a significant amount of pain or discomfort. So, ultimately, she is not disabled by her physical condition, she is disabled by the world around her.

This is, is my opinion, the biggest problem with the Wicked Witch of the East scene. Nessa's life is undeniably harder, but the lyrics incorrectly ascribe her suffering to her disability, when her suffering is actually caused by ableism. Also, wheelchairs are tools of accessibility. They are not bad or shameful things.

So yeah. I'm sorry that was long, but I've been seeing a lot of people asking about why it's ableist and there's no way to explain in one or two sentences, because this a complicated topic with complicated feelings. I hope I covered all the bases.

[cryvelv3t]

Cody x domtop! Male Reader

Warnings: Oral, Breeding, rough fucking, Semi-public/locker room, Praise, Musk, Feminization

"So, what's next for the tag team champions?" A reporter asked you and Cody "I don't really know; all I know is that we're going to beat everyone that comes at us." Cody responded, his hand finding your shoulder. You smiled in agreement and placed your hand on his thigh, Cody's smile faltered slightly as his cheeks flushed. "Any more questions?" You asked while slowly bringing your hand down to the bulge in his pants, "Yes! Cody, why did you choose him as your tag team partner? I'm sorry but it all seems so sudden." He smiled "So, um. My friend here is-" His voice broke as you began to apply pressure on his bulge. He let out a heavy breath "Sorry, I got a little distracted, but he's really fun to work with. And he's a stronger fighter while I'm a stronger talker." You smiled at his answer before pressing a little harder, Cody's hand went up to hide his face. You could hear a low groan come out of him; his hand able to hide the sound from the mic in front of him. "We really are the perfect team." Cody took his hand off your shoulder. He looked at you for a few seconds until a reporter called you name "Yeah?" you responded quickly "It's similar as the question before what made you agree to Cody's offer?" You smiled widely "Okay, the story is pretty long both in the ring and in the dressing rooms. But long story short I hated him when he first asked but as I watched how hard he worked in those matches and how much strength he has. It changed. The man has a lot of will power and I respect it." You released the pressure off his bulge "Wha-" Cody's eyes were wide, and he had a huge smile "What? Too much admiration?" You smiled lightly. Cody shook his head quickly "No, no it was swee-"Don't ruin your moment." You cut him off applying pressure to his cock once again, his head dropped and fell against the table "You good?" He nodded and brought his head back up. Cody's face was redder than a tomato. He looked around waiting for someone to ask a question before he hears someone say something about how the conference is coming to an end.

You and Cody both walked out off the stage and into one of the locker rooms. "What the fuck was that?" He turned around quickly as you closed and locked the door. "What? You don't like the princess treatment." You leaned in to kiss his neck. Cody lets you, his hands finding his way to your biceps "That's not princess treatment, that's humiliation." "Hm, either way. You love it." Your hands make way to his waist to bring him closer. "Fuck." He groaned lightly as he felt your erection rub against his own. "Please, please." He brought his hands up to your face "Kiss me.". With no hesitation you roughly pressed your lips to his. His breath got heavy, and his moves frantic to work off his jacket. "Fuck baby, you're so beautiful." You breathed out, your hands running up and down his body. You sat him down onto a bench in the locker room. "God you're so fucking perfect." You praised. He smiled at your kind words, letting you do whatever you wanted to his "perfect" body. You kissed down his body as you got down on your knees. "Lay down on the bench." You ordered, his eyebrows furrowed "Wh-"Just trust me and do it baby." His eyebrows relaxed and laid down. "What are you going to do?" He asked as he leaned up on his elbows "Just wait, and you'll find out." You hooked your fingers under his belt and pulled them down to his ankles. "I think I have an ide-" his little comment was interrupted by a loud gasp at your warm mouth wrapping around his cock. "Fuck!" He brought a hand up to his mouth. Your cock twitched at his little whimpers; they were so high compared to his normal voice. "God, fuck." He groaned as your sucking became more enthusiastic. He tried to tell you little random things, but it came out as unintelligible babbles.

Your mouth trailed lower and lower to his surprise. "Wait, what are you doing?" He leaned up on his elbows again. Your head popped up "Why? You don't want it?" You climbed back up "No, no, it's fine but what were you doing?" Your eyes widened slightly

Your relationship was still fresh, and it was constantly interrupted by work and your storyline together. And you suspect that you might be Cody's first boyfriend. Because of this new relationship, you want to make him as happy as possible.

"I was going to eat you out. Is that okay?" You asked hoping for clear communication. Cody's eyes widened slightly; he stutters a bit obviously shocked but gives you the okay. You smile at him before kissing down his body, trying to get him to relax. You give a long lick from the base to the tip of his cock, reviling in the way he groans at the action. "Fuck, you smell so good." Cody makes a confused noise, you just got done with a match, he's covered in sweat, and he probably smells like it too. All those thoughts were wiped the moment he felt your tongue swipe his hole "Fuck!" He gasped out. You groaned into his hole as you finally pushed you tongue in, he tasted amazing. This is your new favorite food; your tongue's movements were fast and almost desperate. You were practically making out with Cody's hole, and Cody loved every second of it all. It felt filthy all of it, the sounds, your praises, the action of it, and the fact you were getting off on it too. You pulled away and let your thumb drag across the rim, tugging ever so slightly. You watched as spit dripped out of his messy hole. "Fuck, your cunts so wet." His back arched at the use of the word "cunt". "You like that? You like your hole being called a cunt? Is that right, my good girl?" You whispered the last bit into his ear before dragging your teeth along his ear lobe. He cried out pleading for you to fuck his tight cunt.

You smiled and leaned back down to lick at his hole only this time you added a few fingers. Your fingers searched for that perfect spot inside him "Fuck! Right there. Oh shit! Right there." He let out a string of curses as you abused his prostate with your fingers.

It didn't take much more for Cody to tip over the edge, all it took was one slurp and he came harder than he ever has. "Fuck, oh my god." He breathed out, his breath heavy and hot. "You okay baby?" You climbed back up to be face to face with him "I'm okay." He said quietly "Good." You gave him a small kiss before pulling away to clean him up.

Cody made a disapproving sound "Oh no, we're not done!" He grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to him. "Baby, I don't have a condom, lube. Nothing." "I don't care, you're fucking me." His hands found their way to the sides of your face and kissed you forcefully. You felt your cock twitch at his desperate sounds he let out into your mouth. You let out a light groan as you ground your erection into his. Quickly, you unzipped your pants, eager to feel him wrapped around you. "Fuck. Please daddy." He whined at the feeling of your dick teasing around his hole. He froze up once he said that "I-" He pulled away from you with wide eyes "I'm sorry," You cut him off with a deep kiss "That's a good girl, let daddy take care of you." You whispered into his mouth. He moaned loudly, back arching once again making him pull away from your mouth. You leaned up to look down at his hole before spitting directly on it as a replacement for lube. You heard a small whimper punched out of him. You lined up your erection with his hole and pushed in slowly.

The two groaned out in sync "God, you're so tight." You said through gritted teeth. Your body bent over him, your forehead bumping against his collar bone "And you're so big. So full." He whispered out, his head thrown back. Once you bottomed out both of you completely stopped moving, no sound other than your hands rubbing his skin and the sound of heavy breathing.

"Move. Move please." Cody's voice was breathless and higher than normal. Genuinely how could you deny such a pretty boy, with a pretty voice to match. You began thrusting slowly but harsh and deep. Cody moaned out at the action. "God, your cunts taking me so well." You groaned, watching your cock disappear inside him. Cody moaned out a string of curses as he shakily leaned up on his elbows to see before immediately laying back down at the sight, crying out even louder. If you weren't so entranced by the beautiful picture Cody makes you would be more worried about the crash you heard when his head made contact with the bench. "Kiss me, kiss me, please daddy!" He moaned, reaching his arms out to grab you. You obliged, leaning down to capture his lips in a messy kiss. He could barely kiss back he was such a wreck. Drool pooled out of his pink, swollen lips, and he could not stop moaning as your thrusts became more and more harsh. The onslaught abuse to his prostate made him sensitive, he knew he wasn't going to last much longer. "Close." He managed to spit out "Me too, baby." "Inside, inside please." You smiled "okay, baby. You want me to breed you full?" "Yes! Yes!" He moaned, nodding desperately. It only took a few more thrusts before he came on the two of your stomachs. "Fuck." You groaned at the tightness that made you spill your load.

"So, so fucking full. Thank you, daddy." He smiled as he worked to calm his breath. "I love you, Cody." You whispered into his neck "I love you too." He wrapped his arms around your neck and kissed the top of your head.

"Hello?" You heard someone yell outside the door. "Fuck." You whispered; both of your eyes wide. "Dammit." You two rushed to get dressed.

[nanamissuit]

Aaa I just discovered your blog with the Kon Kon and reader with autism—my heart ;u;

is it possible to ask for a part 2 of that, if that’s ok! Maybe like early stages of König and his partner but maybe the reader has also never experienced a romantic relationship?

so sorry if this is odd or anything ;3; I hope you’re having a great day and staying hydrated!!

His love - König 2

Pairing: König x Autistic!GN Reader

Warnings: Gun mention,Fluff

Boyfriend!König Who has had eyes on you before he even knew your name, he found you so intriguing. When he finally built the courage to ask for your name and number you gave it to him.

Boyfriend!König Who notices very early on that you don’t really understand his flirting and some of his jokes so he makes his best efforts to make it extremely obvious to you so you’re not confused.

Boyfriend!König Who is so excited when you finally pick up on his hints. He asked you out on a date and you happily accepted. 

Boyfriend!König Who listens to all your little rambles on your first date no matter what it was about just because he loved hearing your voice and you being so interested in something, but that’s when the topic of relationships came up.

“Yeah so I’ve never had a serious relationship, my autism kinda gets in the way is what I’m told.” “People are douchebags Schatz you’re perfect. I promise your autism isn’t an issue. I’ll love you no matter what.”

You smiled at his statement and when the date was over you invited him to your house for a little movie date. He remembered the movie you talked about at dinner and immediately put it on for you just so he could see you get all excited, and that's when he first learned about your stimming and he was so in love.

Boyfriend!König Who buys you loads of flowers and you’re not used to all the kind treatment he shows you so you get embarrassed and just say, “Thank you Kon Kon.” Which is a nickname you gave him early on because you thought it would suit him.

But one day you slowly understand the flowers and you start giving him kisses on the cheek instead, and his face gets all red and he has to pretend that didn’t just make his heart all fuzzy and warm.

Boyfriend!König Who makes sure you understand his jokes and humor. He makes sure that no one around you makes fun of you either because you can’t quite understand the difference in sarcasm and seriousness.

Like for example someone called you dumb and that was sarcasm so he looked at you and just said “Sarcasm.” And you nodded but one time someone called you annoying and he said “Seriousness” And you got upset and he punched them.

Boyfriend!König Who remembers all your hyperfixations and buys things that are related to whatever you like, whether it be a book, action figure, album, tapestry, etc. He’s bought it for you. 

Boyfriend!König Who lets you have designated times alone so you can regroup and calm down. If you ever go to his base and someone dares to bother you during that time? 10 Laps and 30 Pushups. He wants his love to be able to calm down after a long day of loud noises and annoying people.

Boyfriend!König Who lets you do his skincare, makeup, nails, or even hair. Whatever you wanna do he lets you. He has no problem embracing his feminine side a bit. 

Boyfriend!König Who lets you pick out every song in the car if you go on a road trip just because he loves to see that little smile and adores you when you get all happy over something small.

Boyfriend!König Who has let you touch his guns with the safety lock on. You have no idea how many people he’s killed with that but you find it so fascinating he just has them. He smiles whenever you observe them and ask questions about them. 

Boyfriend!König Who orders food to the house instead of going out because you hate loud surroundings and crowded ones you despise so he’ll order whatever food you’re craving just because. He’ll even feed it to you if you asked him to. And he makes sure to use the right spoon,knife,and fork so you’re not uncomfortable.

I really like this HC sm RAHHHH<3

[park-jimin-isnt-real]

"edge of tonight" part seventeen ~ the withdrawal

pairing: namjoon x reader (lots of platonic ot7 x reader) rating: T 16+ genre: mafia au, angst this part: Maybe you should go back. tw: mafia au!, angst, swearing, talk of dissociation, jimin is an asshole, i cannot stress enough how much you will not like jimin by the end of this chapter (you'll love him by the end of the next one), jungkook is a sweetheart and we don't deserve him word count: ~7.6k track #20: Addicted ~ Kelly Clarkson: “It's like I'm lost, it's like I'm giving up slowly.” the edge of tonight masterlist an: special thanks to everyone who stuck around long enough for this update. sorry it's late. life happens. but better late than never i guess! please let me know what you think! a little comment or dm goes a long way to helping me get through writing the next parts. thank you so much for reading!!

You stared back at your reflection in the window until it disappeared, the world outside becoming brighter. You didn't even bother trying to sleep; still in your dress, heels abandoned by the bed, arms wrapped around your legs as if that alone would protect you from your demons.

Today was going to be a bad day.

This was going to be the kind of day where, were you still in Busan, Jackson would smile and handle you gently. He wouldn't raise his voice, wouldn't bring anything up to remind you of your past. These types of days, you would be a ghost, and they were Jackson's favorite days.

But Jackson wasn't here. Jackson wasn't talking to you. Jackson wouldn’t walk you from one couch to another, wouldn't feed you small bits of kimchi, wouldn't take care of you the way you couldn't take care of yourself.

You'd hardly had any days like this since coming to Seoul, but even when you did you were still able to call Jackson. It wasn't the same, you being curled up all alone on your shitty couch in your shitty apartment, Jackson's voice crackling through the receiver instead of whispering gently into your ear.

He wasn't there, but you still had him.

Now you didn't have anything.

There was a knock outside your door. You didn't respond, hoping whoever it was would think you were still asleep and leave you be. A few minutes passed—and you thought you had been left alone once more—before you heard the last voice you wanted to.

"I know you're awake, beautiful," Park's overly cheery voice rang through the open crack. "You can either open the door on your own, or I can huff and puff and blow it down!"

A frustrated groan managed its way out of your throat, and you simply dropped your head into your arms. Maybe if you kept ignoring him, he'd take the hint and go away?

You felt the door being opened more than you heard it. "Fun night?" Park asked, walking in despite not being invited. You knew you looked terrible, and you knew that he knew, based on your appearance alone, that you did not have a fun night.

You still didn't respond, still hoping that the silent treatment would work, but you also knew that the chance was slim. He was proving to be as annoying as Jackson. Your arms squeezed a little tighter at the comparison. Park wasn't Jackson, he couldn't do for you what Jackson did.

But he might be the closest you could get right now.

"Come on, beautiful," Park continued talking to you even though you weren't answering back. "Let's get you in the shower."

A soft and warm hand grabbed at one of yours and started pulling you up. It was his touch that finally broke you from your near-frozen state. "Don't touch me!" You ripped your hand away, looking up to glare at him.

You were only met with a bright smile, but it didn't meet his eyes. "There you are! For a minute there, I was wondering if Choi Jaeseong actually managed to break you." You couldn't hide the flinch at the mention of Choi's name. His smile faded. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Now come on," he repeated, this time gesturing to the bathroom. "Shower time."

You tried moving away from him more, but you hadn't moved in hours and your limbs were too stiff to act quickly. Still, you spat out, "I can take care of myself."

Park looked you up and down several times, skepticism practically radiating out of him. "You might wanna try that line again when you don't look like last night's leftovers."

The amount of rage-fueled adrenaline that started coursing through you was something you hadn't experienced often and was usually only brought about by something Rosé's ex-boyfriend said or did. But Park's comment was enough to get your heart rate up and your body moving, if only to try and kill him.

"Get! Out!" You yelled, grabbing the pillow you used on the couch and hurling it at him. Park simply caught it and tossed it back onto the couch.

"Shower," he told you again, but at least he was headed towards the door this time. "You have half an hour before I come back and drag you downstairs for breakfast, regardless of what state you're in!"

"Fuck off, Park!" He had mostly closed the door behind him and you could hear his footsteps get further away, but you swore you could hear a snicker at your screamed explicative.

"Half an hour!" He called in return, his voice considerably quieter due to the distance now between you.

You rolled your eyes, not even willing to consider that his threat was real. But he did also seem like the exact person who would pull you from the middle of your shower and take you to the kitchen, half-covered in suds and only wrapped in a towel, so maybe you should treat it with some level of solemnity.

You started stretching your body out, realizing just how uncomfortable your position had been all night. Once you felt okay enough to stand, you went to the bathroom and turned the shower on.

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

"Morning," Taehyung greeted you as you walked into the kitchen half an hour later, not looking up from his phone. Park was at the stove, apron on, flipping pancakes onto a plate.

"Hey," you responded, walking to the island but not taking a seat. Tae moved one over from his stool, probably giving you some more room. You could also sense the tension between the two of them, and you wondered briefly if it was the same problem from the beginning of the year.

Park looked over his shoulder as he turned the stove off. "Damn, you look way better," he smirked. "You're welcome."

You crossed your arms, trying not to explode at him. "I didn't ask for your help."

"But you needed it." He picked up the plate of pancakes and turned, placing it in the center of the island. "Eat up!" He said with an overly bright smile. Taehyung rolled his eyes.

You stood still. "How do I know you didn't poison them?"

Park's smile didn't drop, but it did turn the tiniest bit sharp. "Seriously?" You didn't react, waiting for him to make a move. He stared you down only for another moment, then picked up the top pancake with his hand and shoved nearly half of it in his mouth.

You waited until he had swallowed before speaking again. "That doesn't tell me anything."

"Oh my god." Now his smile dropped and he had to take a deep breath to keep himself in check. "Y/N, I admit that I am not Jin-hyung in the kitchen, but I'm also not Namjoon-hyung." He picked the plate up again, moving it closer to you and dropping it enough to hear the glass rattle a bit. "Eat the goddamn pancakes."

Park took off the apron, balling it up and leaving it on the counter, then walked past you on his way out of the kitchen. You waited just a bit longer before meandering your way over to the island to poke at the food.

"I watched him make them," Tae spoke up for the first time since seeing you. "He didn't poison them." He still didn't look at you, and it was a little weird how he hardly ever did when he talked to you, but you supposed that was part of his whole thing.

"Is he always like this?" You asked in return. Jungkook kept trying to tell you Jimin-hyung is actually really nice but you just couldn't see it. Taehyung took his own deep breath.

"No," he answered, "he really isn't. Jimin is normally very nice and considerate and understanding, while still being a little shit."

You finally sat down and pulled the pancake plate to you as you listened. "How come he's being a big shit when it comes to me?" You picked up the half-eaten pancake that Park left and started ripping it into smaller pieces to eat.

"Because he thinks he's helping, and I understand why he's doing it but I don't agree with the execution. He should be a lot nicer to you."

You didn't want to admit that the pancake was good. Not Jin good, but good. No traces of poison anywhere to be found. You didn't really think that Park would try to poison you, but you just didn't understand why this one person just couldn't give you the same space that the rest of the members had.

"Why's he doing it then? Why isn't he being nicer?"

Taehyung sighed and didn't answer you for a moment. He put his phone down but still refused to look at you. “Ultimately, that's not my story to tell,” he said. “You'll need to ask Jimin yourself.”

“Ask me what?” The devil himself asked as he came back into the kitchen. You barely spared him a glance and noticed he had changed into his usual suit get-up, hair parted perfectly to expose his forehead.

If you were different people, it would've been attractive.

“And where are you off to?” Taehyung asked as you took another bite of pancake, hoping it would keep Park from talking to you.

“Hot date,” the answer came, and you were surprised by the anger that started coming from the man next to you. They were friends and had a strange bond, but you couldn't help wondering what was so wrong about Park going out that had Taehyung all worked up.

The cruel voice in your head tried suggesting that you and Park were more alike than you'd like to believe, and Taehyung was his Jackson. You shut that thought out before it could gain root. Even if you were right, you didn't need to gain any sympathy for Park and how he was treating you.

“Have fun, you two!” The bastard called as he headed out the door.

“Doing what?!” Taehyung yelled back before the door could fully close. Park only stuck his head back in, a stupid, cheeky grin on his stupid face.

“Make sure she doesn't dissociate.” The door closed fully faster than you could fling a stupid pancake at him for the comment. Taehyung dropped his head into his hands, giving up, as you both heard the garage opening and Park starting his car and driving off.

“I am going to kill him one of these days,” you said around a pancake bite.

Taehyung only sighed again but looked at you this time. “I’ll let you beat him up a bit, how's that?”

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

You were getting tired again. You could feel it in your soul, in that weight you carried no matter where you went. You were tired of all the late nights, the bad sex, the lack of relevant information. The only thing that had kept you so present lately was Park's now daily pestering.

Honestly, If it weren't for fucking Park and his fucking meddling, you would've become that ghost of yourself Jackson loved so much. And then maybe Jackson would've sensed that change in you and would've unblocked you by now and you'd be talking to him again but noooooo. Park just had to keep pushing every button to get you angry, and if there was one thing that cut through your bone-deep weariness, it was your anger.

It was this dissonance in your head that kept you from really focusing on whatever theory you, Namjoon, and Jungkook were trying to figure out at that moment. After the third round of repeated questions and gentle shoulder touches to bring you back, Namjoon softly suggested that maybe you take a break.

“Jungkook and I can keep working on this if you want to go do something else?” His tone was nothing but genuine concern, but the words themselves reminded you too much of similar things Jackson had told you.

“You don't have to be here, you can go train or something.”

As sympathetic as his suggestion was supposed to be, Namjoon only made you feel that tired more.

“Come to the gym with me tomorrow.”

Both your head and Namjoon's snapped to the youngest in surprise, not expecting him to speak up, much less offer anything.

“Why?” You asked. In the almost three months you had spent living with them, Jungkook had never invited you to his gym before.

He didn't immediately answer you like he usually did. Instead, his eyes flicked between you and Namjoon several times, bottom lip bitten due to nerves.

“I was told not to tell you why or who told me to ask you,” he finally said. Namjoon only looked more confused, but that tired you were just barely feeling switched over to the anger.

“Why?” Namjoon echoed your question but you could already guess the who and the why.

“Park can ask me to do things himself, instead of getting you to do his dirty work.” Your only immediate regret was that your tone made Jungkook flinch back from you the smallest amount.

“Jimin-hyung thought the suggestion would be better coming from me,” he explained quietly, trying not to upset you further. It made you feel worse about accidentally taking your anger out on him. Jungkook didn't deserve that.

So you turned to Namjoon instead, who also didn't deserve it but could at least throw it back at you if you went too far. It was a skill every gang leader needed.

“Can you get Park to back off? I'm perfectly fine without his help.”

Namjoon sighed, clearly already done with the topic at hand. “I've talked with Jimin several times already, as have most other members. I don't think there's any stopping him at this point.”

You threw your head back with a groan. “I just want to be left alone! Is that really so much to ask?”

The room was silent for a moment, then Jungkook quietly spoke up again. “Jimin-hyung thinks that it would help you if you got out of the estate during the day, and Hobi-hyung said that you used to train a lot when you were in Busan, and the best place to train is at a gym.”

While you were once again upset at the mention of Jimin thinks you should do this, you were surprised to hear Jungkook say Hobi-hyung rather than Hoseok-hyung. As far as you were aware, you were the only one who referred to him as Hobi.

Maybe you had a greater influence here than you originally thought.

“And you own a gym?” You guessed. You had remembered a gym name being thrown around occasionally, and it was an easy assumption that Jungkook's side business would be somewhere he and the rest of the members could train themselves.

“It's not a bad idea,” Namjoon said, albeit hesitantly. He didn't want to force you into anything you weren't comfortable with, but giving you a healthier outlet would be beneficial. “I bet Yeji would like to meet you.”

“And you would get along with her so well!” Jungkook added.

You stood up, officially done with this conversation, and spoke as you headed to the office door, “I don't need any more friends, female or otherwise, but thanks for the offer. Tell Park to fuck off for me.” And with that, you left the office.

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

There wasn't a night where you didn't miss Rosé, but most nights the longing was so quiet you hardly noticed it anymore.

Jungkook's offer to go train at his gym and Namjoon's suggestion of meeting Yeji (whoever she was) brought your attention back to the first real female friend you ever made, and the tragic circumstances of her disappearance. Only now you knew how she disappeared, and you knew she was happy.

That didn't make the feeling go away, though. 

You were so fucking tired of feelings. You were tired of being fucking tired, too. If Jackson would just unblock you, he could help you not feel so tired, or at least help you stop feeling in general.

Maybe you should go back.

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

It took you three days to accept Jungkook's offer. You weren't happy about it, but Park was right again. Getting you out of the estate for a bit would help you, and punching things and/or people would be a great way to vent your stupid emotions.

If it worked in Busan, it would work now too.

The Basement was a standard gym, with treadmills and weight machines and punching bags. You asked Jungkook why he named it The Basement, but he only smirked at you.

“It's where I'm supposed to stay.”

You didn't bother asking anything further to decipher the cryptic answer. It sounded like an inside joke and you weren't interested.

As he led you further into the building, you saw a couple of boxing rings, both of which were occupied by people sparring with each other. One had a young woman with her red hair tied up in a high ponytail, going at it with another girl with blonde hair who looked similar in age.

It reminded you a bit too much of Busan.

The other ring had two men sparring. Both the women and one of the men had purple bands tied around one arm.

“Anyone with that purple band is a member of the ‘staff’,” Jungkook explained, showing you the one he had on. He leaned a bit closer and continued quietly, “They know what we do, and to certain extents, they help us when needed.”

You nodded your understanding. You'd make sure not to use the members’ real names then, just to be safe. Jungkook continued to guide you to the boxing ring with the two women. “Yeji!” He called up to them, and they both stopped and turned. “Come down and meet Y/N!”

You felt your face redden slightly at the sudden attention. Several heads turned your way, staring unapologetically. You started considering making a break for it, but you'd have to walk back to the main estate. You didn't know the way, and it'd be too dangerous for you to be out on the streets alone like that.

You were stuck here. Unfortunately.

The redhead climbed out of the ring quickly, pulling the gloves off with her teeth. “Hello!” She said with a quick bow, still slightly out of breath. “I'm Yeji, it's so nice to finally meet you!”

You offered a small smile and bowed back, but you still didn't say anything. You failed to see how Namjoon thought you two would become friends.

“Yeji is from Jeonju,” Jungkook brought up. “Y/N's been in Busan the past few years.”

Jeonju piqued your interest. “How'd you get up here?” You asked her quietly, not sure if it was a story she'd be willing to share.

“My dad couldn't pay off his drug debt, so the boss took me instead,” Yeji replied, a twinge of sadness in her eyes, but nothing else gave her emotion away. “I was sold in the Trade—” what the southern underground called sex trafficking “—and eventually found myself in Seoul.”

You looked between her and Jungkook, a bit afraid to ask your next question. “How'd you get out?”

“The Y/N Initiative,” came the reply from both of them, but Yeji continued, “So you're a different kind of famous in the lower circles.”

“No wonder me coming back from the dead made such a stir.” Yeji and Jungkook laughed, but you didn't understand why.

“Yeji, why don't you get Y/N warmed up while I go get her a band,” Jungkook said, then walked away, leaving you and this new girl who was supposed to become your friend alone.

“Busan's pretty rough.” Yeji led you to the now-empty boxing ring. "We don’t get many girls from that far south up here very often.”

“I wasn’t planning on being another one,” you vaguely explained. “Everything just sort of happened and now I’m here.” You pulled yourself up and slid between the ring ropes, feeling a sense of familiarity amidst the new environment. You knew your way around a boxing ring very well, and a part of you wondered if another member owned or had easy access to a shooting range.

“Well, I’m glad you made it,” Yeji told you, climbing up after you. She handed you a pair of boxing gloves, which you took a bit too hesitantly. “And hopefully you aren’t too rusty, it’s been a long time since I’ve sparred with someone from the South.” Her cheeky tone made you smirk, and you almost missed the wink she sent your way.

Sparring with Yeji was reminiscent of sparring in Busan, and you found yourself more present than you had been in months. Something was refreshing about not overthinking into the void and just throwing punches and kicks.

There was also something infuriating about fucking Park being fucking right fucking again.

You even had a chance to go toe to toe with Jungkook once he returned with a purple band for you, and you had to admit that you had fun. You'd never had fun training before, but something about Jungkook's stupid bunny grin as he egged you on and told you “You can hit harder than that, come on” brought a smile to your face.

Something resembling a smile, anyway.

You were panting and drenched in sweat by the time you called it quits. Yeji led you to the girls' locker room so you could rinse off, and even left you some simple clothes for you to change into.

“We always have extras here,“ she explained as she handed the jeans and t-shirt to you. “Just in case someone needs them.” She winked and left, giving you your privacy. Something about that sounded a bit flirty, but you could tell it was harmless. It was probably for the Y/N Initiative.

You didn't take long in the locker room, not wanting to hold Jungkook back since he was your ride. You didn't see him, though, when you walked back onto the main floor.

You shrugged it off, he was probably doing some kind of business management thing. He wouldn't leave without you, so you decided to make your way to the front and wait for him. You walked past a couple of different small groups of people on your way.

The last one made you double-take.

“Oh. My. God.” Your voice caught the attention of the group and the man you were looking at. His eyes went wide in recognition as you continued. “This is where your little rat ass made it?”

“Those are big words coming from such a little bird,” Jay Park taunted back. “Where's your owner? Shouldn't he have you on a leash?”

“Is your dick still functional?” You fake whispered, catching the attention of others nearby. Park's face turned red from embarrassment and anger, while a few girls laughed.

“Are you the one who did that to him?” someone called, and the guys surrounding him snickered. Apparently, you were a legend in more than one way.

“He had to learn no means no somehow.” Jay Park stalked towards you, but you held your ground. You hadn't seen him since that day, and if you thought back hard enough, you could still taste the blood in your mouth. Park took a deep breath on his way over, calming himself back down. That was unusual to you—he used to have a temper as bad as Rosé's ex. You weren't sure what to make of it, or how to respond, so you stepped back.

“For as much of a little shit you are, it's nice to see you finally out of Busan.” You only blinked at him, completely thrown off by his 180-degree shift.

“Didn't think you'd be one to care,” you said back, but not with the same amount of bite you had before.

Park shrugged, “People change. I didn't care about a lot of things until I got out and found this place. Jungkook put a few good beatings on my ass.”

You still didn't fully trust him, or what he was saying, but he also sounded genuine. You knew that getting away from the wrong place, the wrong people, could make someone turn around for the better. You just never expected it with Jay Park.

He had a purple band on, though. If Jungkook trusted him, then maybe you could give him a shot too?

“How long have you been up here?”

“Since the day after you tried biting my dick off.” You couldn't help the twitch of your lips into a small smirk. “I got in a bad fight with Jackson over it. Told him to fuck off and then got the hell outta there. He isn't here too, is he?” Park glanced around, nervous to see the person you were dying to hear back from.

“Jackson's still down in Busan,” you admitted in a smaller voice than you would have liked.

“He let you come up here all by yourself?”

You refused to look at him, your gaze pointedly on the ground. “I… kind of ran away. And now he won't talk to me.”

“Shit,” Park muttered, “you're getting help from Bangtan and still trying to stay in contact with the person you're running from?”

“I didn't run from Jackson,” you spat out, although you weren't sure you believed the statement yourself. “I was offered a really good job up here and I took it. And then things started falling apart, so now Bangtan is helping me. And Jackson doesn't like that I'm not back in Busan working with him. So he stopped talking to me.”

Park stood in silence, taking all of that in. It was weird, having him just listen to you, to not hear some stupid comment from him. But, at the same time, it was nice to see someone you knew from Busan. It was nice to talk about Jackson with someone who also knew him.

“You know,” Park finally said, “for as much of a dickwad as he is, Jackson does care a lot about you.” And you did know that. “You said you were working on some kind of job up here, and that's cool, but if he's not talking to you, you may wanna head back down to Busan for a couple days and try to patch things up with him. Maybe even see if he'll come back with you and start helping.”

“Hey Jay, let's go!” One of the other guys called for him, and the rest of the group headed into one of the sparring areas.

Park nodded to you, “Guess I'll be seeing you around, ya little bitch.” Then he turned and ran to rejoin his friends. You couldn't even offer a decent comeback. You just stood, nearly frozen, digesting his words. There was only one thing ringing around in your head.

Maybe you should go back.

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

You stayed in, sending Hueningkai a message to take the night off. There were too many things bouncing around inside your head to try and seduce information out of others tonight.

You were thinking too much, and you couldn't get your brain to stop. A single thought drowned out the rest, weaving itself into each idea, playing like a broken record.

Maybe you should go back.

Jackson could help you. Jackson could get your mind to stop. Jackson could calm your worries with a few words, a quick fuck, whatever was needed. Jackson was the one you needed.

And Jackson was in Busan. So maybe you should go back, you should definitely apologize, and hope he puts your months-long act of defiance behind him. He'd forgive you eventually, he always did. Especially if you were good.

Jackson does care a lot about you, Jay Park had said, you may wanna head back down. Never in your wildest dreams would you have ever thought you'd be considering Jay Park's advice, but all he really did was say out loud what you had already been thinking. Jackson cares about you, and you should go back.

With a small groan, you rolled yourself off your couch landing facedown on the floor. The slight change didn't do much for your racing mind, but at least the different environment convinced your body that moving was okay. After breathing in the carpet for another moment, you pushed yourself up, slowly getting on your feet.

Silently, you crept towards your door, slightly ajar as always. While part of you understood you didn't need to creep around, that no one here was going to yell at you, you did still want to be respectful of the time. 3 AM wasn't an ideal time to be awoken, but you knew at least one member who would still be up.

You tiptoed down the hall, glad your target's room was only one down from yours. The light in Namjoon's office was on, the door mostly closed, but you could hear the leader snoring inside. You were safe to be a little louder.

Quickly, but still quietly, you knocked on the door four times. After waiting a few minutes and not receiving any response, you tried again a little louder this time.

Still nothing.

You let out a soft sigh. Either Yoongi was actually asleep, or he wasn't here tonight, which meant you couldn't badger him for some more sleeping pills. You just wanted one good night's rest for once, it couldn't have been too much to ask for.

You turned around, starting to head back into your room, but a quiet voice stopped you.

“Y/N-ssi?” Jungkook spoke softly, his tone concerned. “Are you okay?”

You turned towards the youngest, who was in sleeping clothes but somehow looked more awake than he should be, and offered a small smile. “Yeah, just wanted to see if Yoongi was up.” It wasn't a total lie.

“I think he crashed at his place tonight,” Jungkook said. “Something about being at the studio for too long and not wanting to drive all the way out here.”

You nodded, then offered a small wave. “Well, good ni—”

“Do you want to get a late-night snack?” Jungkook asked, interrupting you. You just looked at him, confused, until he added, “I was gonna get something for myself, but we can share if you want to.”

Your stomach started aching a bit at the mention of food. You did eat a small dinner, but that was many hours ago. Maybe another small something would help you rest a bit more. You simply nodded, walking towards him and following him down to the basement.

“Would you prefer sweet or salty?” Jungkook asked as he stared at the snack pantry. You made a beeline for the couch, wrapping yourself up in a blanket to shield yourself from the cold.

“Neither?” Your answer sounded more like a question. You weren't sure what you were craving, not what exactly they had to offer.

“Savory it is, then.” You heard the sound of plastic crinkling, then peered over the back of the couch to see Jungkook carrying a package of jerky. Your mouth watered a bit. That would be perfect for a midnight snack. He sat at the other end of the couch, then opened the package and offered it to you first. You snaked a hand out from the warmth and grabbed a few pieces.

The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a while, just snacking. Jungkook looked awake and asleep at the same time, and you wondered if you needed to be the responsible one and get him back into bed.

Jungkook stood once the jerky was gone, stretching his arms above his head. “Thank you for letting me sit with you, Y/N-ssi.”

Maybe it was because it was nearly 4 AM and you were tired and restless all at once. Maybe it was because this kid had been so sweet and respectful since you got here that it wore you down. Maybe it was because you were sick of hearing him say Y/N-ssi when everyone else here was far less formal with you. 

“Jungkook,” you called as he headed for the stairs. He turned around, sleepy but curious. You swallowed. “You can call me Noona, if you want.”

A big bunny grin slowly spread across his face. “Really?”

“Go to bed.”

He just laughed. “Goodnight, Noona!”

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

You were about to lose your mind.

It had been months since you'd last spoken to Jackson, since he had cut you off, and you couldn't take it anymore. Between his voice echoing in your head every night, to shitty sex that hardly got you what you wanted, to all of Park's stupid fucking remarks—you hadn't slept properly in weeks because you couldn't get out of your head long enough.

You were thinking too much, and you couldn't take it anymore. You needed Jackson back, and if that meant going back to Busan, then that's what you were going to do.

And maybe Jay Park was right! Maybe if you went back and showed how sorry you were, Jackson would come back to Seoul with you, and then you and he and all of Bangtan could work together to solve this mystery!

(Somewhere deep inside, you knew that wouldn't happen, but if that idea was what got you back to Busan, back to Jackson, then that's what you would keep telling yourself.)

Maybe you would spend just one or two more days here, and then have Hueningkai drive you to the train station. You'd have to take all the money with you though—it was half the reason you took the job in Seoul. Maybe you'd take a night train then, to be less conspicuous, but that would also mean walking through the dark streets of Busan with a large amount of cash on you.

Could you get Kai to drive you all the way to Busan?

But you really shouldn't be asking anything more of Kai, he was so young, and driving you all the way down to Busan and then coming back to Seoul all by himself? No, that was too much. Would one of the others be willing to drive you? Jungkook was from Busan originally, maybe he'd like to visit? And he would be able to handle himself if anything happened, which was always a possibility in the South.

Yeah, maybe that's what you'd do. In another day or two, you'd ask Jungkook to drive you down to Busan. Wait, no, fuck, you couldn't ask Jungkook, he's wanted dead or alive in Busan! It's too risky for him to take you, and no one else would without a very good reason. Could you pin it on a new lead? Some thread of information you collected one night from who knows which man you slept with. No, that wouldn't work either, they'd all see right through that.

Goddammit, why was this so hard? You made the plan to leave Busan in an hour and executed it the next day. Why couldn't you make a plan to get back to Busan?

You were going to have to take the train, and you would need to get someone to take you to the train station. Or maybe you'd walk there yourself. You could probably figure out the way. Could you get there before a rival gang recognized you and tried to kill you? Or worse, what if Song's men caught you and tried taking you back to wherever Song was?

No, you'd need someone to actually drive you there. You'd have to leave the money here, too. Just tell Jackson you got most of it back but you had to leave it in Seoul for safety reasons. That would make him come back to Seoul with you, too.

Okay, yes, that was it! You'd leave the money here. Someone, Jungkook probably, would drive you to the train station. You'd go back to Busan, meet up with Jackson, eventually gain his forgiveness, and then tell him you got most of the money back but you couldn't travel with it. Then he'd bring you back to Seoul where you'd reunite with Bangtan and continue making strides towards solving the mystery but now with help from the one person you needed most.

It would be perfect! What could possibly go wrong?

┈     ┈     ┈     ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟     ┈     ┈     ┈

You waited for the next day Jungkook would take you to the Basement with him. He didn't take you every day, despite a certain member pressuring the two of you to go. Some days Jungkook had his own share of gang activity to take care of, and you still wanted to keep some distance between Yeji and Jay Park. You enjoyed taking shitty naps on the good couch on those days, until said certain member decided you'd had enough alone time.

Maybe you would stab him just once before going back down to Busan.

So here you were, just a few short weeks after your first time at the gym, dressed the same way you were when you first arrived in Seoul. You tucked your hair behind your red baseball cap and tugged your green jacket around you a bit tighter. Jackson had given you these forever ago, and you knew he'd be happy to see you return in them.

And you wanted to make Jackson as happy as possible. It would make getting back on his good side easier.

You checked the time on your phone once more, then tucked it into a pocket and temporarily left your room for the last time. You'd be back. You just weren't sure when. You didn't let yourself look back or turn around, this was happening and it was happening now.

Jungkook was waiting for you in the living room, messing around with Taehyung on some phone game. Park stood by the entrance to the kitchen, scrolling absentmindedly on his phone. They all looked up when you reached the bottom of the stairs.

“Are you ready to go?” Jungkook asked you, only slightly confused. You took the jacket with you just about everywhere—he knew that—but he didn't usually see you in the hat anymore, not to mention you weren't dressed for going to a gym.

“Yeah,” you answered, not stopping. If you stopped, they'd have a chance to question you and you needed to get Jungkook into the car. Jungkook started to follow you, but fucking Park moved to block your way.

“You don't look like you're going to the gym.” He was much less confused, far more stern, something you were more used to with Jackson. He slid his phone into his pocket, giving you his full attention.

You tried sidestepping him multiple times, but he wasn't letting you pass. Jungkook moved away, giving you two space, while Tae watched from the couch.

“Move, Park.” You were so done with him, with his stupid voice and comments and “helpful” tips about what you should and shouldn't be doing. You already had one man trying to control your life, you didn't need another one. And you were trying to get back to the first!

“Why are you dressed like that?” He asked instead, making himself more comfortable in the doorway. You clenched your fists at your sides, beyond ready to throw a punch at him. He was still a member of Bangtan, though, and you were still trying to keep physical violence out of it.

He wasn't making it easy.

“Why do you have to critique every choice I try to make? Why can't you just let me live my life?”

“Why were you searching for the train station schedule?” You took a small step back in shock. “Are you planning on going somewhere?”

How did Park of all people know that? You were alone in the kitchen when you made that search earlier. You had heard someone come in while you were washing your breakfast dishes, and you had left your phone on the island counter but you were sure—

“You left your phone unlocked, with the schedule right there on the screen.” Park didn't smirk, but with his tone, he might as well have.

You closed your eyes, taking a slow, deep breath, trying to keep yourself under control. You'd have more control over the situation as a whole if you remained calm. No matter how difficult Park made it.

When you opened your eyes again, you met Park's gaze directly. There was no hint of amusement or enjoyment. He had the same fierce determination that you did.

“I don't answer to you.”

“No,” he agreed, “but you do need to answer to the person who's driving you.” He pointed behind you to Jungkook, and you turned to look at the youngest.

Jungkook was very clearly worried about you, about what Park was implying, about what fight might break out. This wasn't going the way you wanted it to, and if you had any hope of salvaging your plan, you needed to get yourself and Jungkook in a car now.

“Can we just go, please, Jungkook?” You asked softly. In a way, Jungkook was like a mini-Namjoon or a mini-Hobi. He'd probably do whatever you asked, and you really needed to take advantage of that right now.

Unfortunately for you, he was also a mini-Jimin.

“Where do you want to go?” He asked in return, just as softly. You could see the hope in his eyes, the desire for Park to be wrong. He wanted you to just go to the gym with him like you had planned, not whatever his hyung was talking about. You needed to check the time, check and see how long this confrontation had taken, and make sure you could still catch the next train to Busan, but it would look too suspicious.

Each member in the room waited in tense silence for you to answer Jungkook's question. If you saved face and said the gym, then once you were in the car you wouldn't be able to change his mind. If you admitted you were planning on going to the train station, he wouldn't take you there now.

At this point, you had been silent for too long, and your answer was clear. Park spoke up again.

"I swear to god if you say you're going back to Busan—"

"Yes, I'm going back to Busan!!" You finally snapped, entirely too fed up with him. You turned on your heel, glaring into his too-serious face. "I can't take it anymore! Jackson hasn't unblocked me and I'm thinking too much and no one else can make it stop!! So get out of my way you fucking asshole!!" You looked over your shoulder back at Jungkook for only a moment, who stood there with wide eyes and was several more steps away from you now.

As you opened your mouth to say "let's go" to him, you were quite literally swept off your feet and flung across Park's shoulders, which were now digging into your chest and stomach painfully. He had one hand firmly around one of your ankles and the other had managed to capture both your wrists.

"Let me GO Park!"

"Jimin, what the fuck, man?" You heard Taehyung speak up for the first time since you descended the stairs.

"Hyung, what are you doing??"

"That's the first genuinely honest thing you've said in weeks," Park said, though you weren't sure if he was talking directly to you or commenting to himself. You struggled against his hold, but this was a position you had never really been in before and definitely hadn't trained to get out of. If you were only slung over one shoulder you could manage, but you couldn't get a decent hit or kick in.

Part of you was starting to panic.

Each step he took up the stairs bounced, and shoved his shoulders into your flesh more, making whatever was going on more uncomfortable.

"I'm calling Namjoon-hyung!" You heard Jungkook threaten. The fact that neither of them was actively trying to stop Park meant they believed you weren't in any serious danger, but you couldn't help the terror creeping through you.

Park released your ankle to open a door, presumably to your bedroom, and grabbed at it again before you could maneuver yourself out of his grasp. You weren't paying attention to where he was taking you, just that it was in the opposite direction of where you wanted to go. A light flicked on and you caught a glimpse of red—so, not your room—and then heard the door slam shut.

The sound was enough to get you to stop fighting. It shocked you back to ten years ago, when you were just as vulnerable and defenseless and alone. You weren't getting out of this.

He took large strides further into the room. The world twisted again as he threw you from his shoulders to something soft.

A bed.

He crawled over you, your body too scared to move. Your mind was racing and frozen at the same time. You looked up into his eyes, dark but not hungry, intense but not angry. You weren't sure what to make of it, so you said the only thing you could.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Your body might be down for the count, but you could always count on your mouth to do something. You expected him to smirk, but he was nothing but serious.

"Jackson isn't the only one who can fuck you stupid."

i have been waiting for this next chapter since i wrote "the bar"!!! this is the one i replay in my head over and over again and i am so excited for you all to finally read it!!! thank you again for your patience and i look forward to hearing back from you what you thought and if you liked it. also let me know if you want to be added to the taglist, i'm redoing it. happy new year!

@snurtsnurt @remmykinsff @sakuyakira @jazajas @mochi13 @fly-you-dam-fools @orangegaytorade @iliketowrite-2 @ijustwnatablog @secretxl @livingbubbles-blog @clowdyblue @nc-anon @shylia

[imtrashraccoon]

Sorry about the shorter chapter today. This prompt was tricky to fit into the current arc and I realized I couldn't include a little scene at the end. So I had to cut it, but not to worry! I should be able to make up for it tomorrow.

@owl-bones

First, Previous, & Next Day

Bad Sansuary II: Nightmare - Paint

Word Count: 598

Note: Donovan is the name I chose for Nightmare in this AU.

Before either of you could even begin to explain, Donovan suddenly whipped out a vial containing a glowing cyan liquid. He dipped a single phalanx into the paint and, using his tendrils to hold you still, traced an odd pattern on your forehead.

"Don't touch it," he growled when he finally released you.

You let out a huff and crossed your arms, fully aware that it made you look like a petulant child but not caring either way. You were only curious about why he had randomly decided to mess up your fur. Whatever that was smelled sort of earthy and you had the urge to spread it all over your face.

Donovan turned to Dirk, who had been looking at you with an amused look. The rogue was given similar treatment as you, although he didn't struggle as much, possibly because he knew better. When Donovan pulled back, you noticed he had drawn a closed eye on Dirk's skull.

"Why did you do that?" you asked.

Donovan let out a quiet hum. "I heard about what happened from Reven and Maul. This special paint has been imbued with my own mana and will protect you from the eye's influence."

Before you could express your amazement at how quickly he had figured out a solution to the possible mind control, the dark lord fully turned his attention on you. "How careless could you be?" he growled as his tendrils tightened around your wrists. "If anything had happened to you, I... I don't know what I would do if I lost you!"

You bit your lower lip and glanced away, flattening your ears against your skull in shame. "I'm sorry. We were trying to leave, I-!"

He interrupted by pulling you into a tender kiss, swallowing your gasp of surprise. It was like his frustration disappeared the moment he had finished scolding you.

"Dearest, the fortress is so lonely without you," he whispered against your lips before he drew back again. "I want nothing more than to bring you home right now..."

Dirk cleared his non-existent throat awkwardly, reminding you that he was still in the room. "that might be easier said than done..." he murmured, keeping his gaze firmly fixed on his feet.

"How so?" Donovan inquired, turning around to face him.

The rogue jerked his thumb to the door he was still leaning against. "behind this door is the creepiest monster i've ever laid eyes on and a half dozen robed freaks."

An amused grin spread across the dark lord's face as he glanced at the cultist robes you were wearing. "Am I to presume you tried to disguise yourselves with their own costumes?"

"something like that..." Dirk muttered as he removed the cloak, dropping it on the ground like a piece of trash. "that monster is somehow suppressing my mana so we had no choice but to try sneaking out."

"I see." Donovan stroked his chin thoughtfully. "That explains why my scrying wasn't working. I was able to transport myself to my dear Scout thanks to our soul connection, but it seems that now even my own mana is limited."

"So what do we do?" you asked quietly.

"We leave by whichever means necessary."

You raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I gathered that much, but that thing outside is really strong. What if we have to fight it?"

Donovan gave you a strange look, as if he was wondering if you were serious. "Then we fight it," he stated in a matter of fact voice. "I swear, I will ensure that we get out of here alive."

[beanghostprincess]

I wanna know who your favorite vinsmoke sibling is so bad actually please tell me 👀✨

My friend and my brother laughed at me when I told them my favorite Vinsmoke is Niji, and I genuinely was embarrassed that day because I didn't really know much about him at the time (I think I had only watched a few eps of WCI) and it's pretty clear in the show that he's, uh, the worst of the Vinsmokes. And by "the worst" I mean: The one who's portrayed as the worst because he's the most active one when it comes to abuse and supremacism within the family line. Unlike Ichiji (who's more serious) and Yonji (who's more playful, somehow) Niji is the one who has to actually fight for a role in his family and that's why I think he's so fucking annoying all the damn time. I hate him. I love him. I want to hug him. But also I wouldn't mind punching him very, very hard. I have mixed feelings, but yeah, Niji is my favorite Vinsmoke. And you haven't asked why, but I feel the need to do some sort of mini argument about this because I am a very resentful person and I want to show my friend and my brother that Niji is actually a very interesting character!! And my fiancé thinks I just like him because he's hot, and she's right but only like a 20%. Maybe 40%.

I will try to put my thoughts into words, but it's pretty difficult because I have a lot of things to say about this blue evil gremlin.

I like Niji the most because I think he is, between the three brothers, the one who shows feelings and ambitions outside their emotionless selves the most. I know they technically are the same, but I don't think so (btw, please assume I'm not including Reiju in this text because she's canonically different from them and I'm just referring to the brothers).

As I mentioned before, I think Niji is the one brother who is the most annoying and evil because he feels the need to stand out. Ichiji is serious, and calculative and has a secure place in the family. He is the number one, even if Reiju is the oldest (I would like to talk more about how Reiju, being a woman, even if she's the oldest, she's the number 0. Because she is the oldest but she's a woman, so she obviously doesn't and would not be able to wear the number 1 like a man would. She is the oldest and yet, she has less significance in the family line than Ichiji. But, yeah, this is something that has nothing to do with Niji, sorry). Ichiji, like all of his siblings, wants recognition from his father, but he doesn't have to try as hard as the others to be impressive because he is, after all, the oldest. The typical "older sibling in an abusive household who has to deal with all the bullshit to protect their siblings"? That's something Reiju took over. That's Reiju's responsibility as the oldest and the woman. Ichiji literally doesn't have to do anything besides leading the team and being the evil, emotionless machine his father created. That does not mean that I don't think he could be able to develop more feelings, because I think he could and I love the concept of him being the first one to protest against Judge's behavior, but you get me. When you're the oldest brother with an even older sister, your responsibilities are pretty limited. So he doesn't have to be anything but there and himself.

Yonji, on the other hand... He is the youngest. Even younger than Sanji. He doesn't have to try, because Niji and Sanji should be the ones to do so. Little siblings are not expected to do much besides existing because irl parents are usually tired of raising children and they end up either getting neglected or seen as decoration. As a little sibling myself I can confirm that these things affect really badly to your brain growing up, but I got a more Sanji treatment so I can't speak for Yonji here. The thing I can say, though, is that in comparison to Niji, Yonji is just there. He's silly and goofy. He's funny. He's dumb. He has the excuse of being the little one to act that way. Getting lost eating or doing whatever. Even the fact that his powers are more physically focused instead of power/intelligence centered shows that he can just punch away his issues. He's the gym bro of the siblings. Don't expect much from him. <- Thing that's often said about little siblings, btw, and affects real fucking badly in early teenage years. The fact that he's portrayed like that is so on point tbh but after all, they don't have high expectations for him, so little to no effort is everything he does.

Then there's Niji, of course. My favorite. Love him. Hate him. Whatever. Niji is the middle child. And God, do I have to say things about middle siblings.

The thing about Niji is that he actually has to try and make a name for himself in the family because otherwise he'll probably get forgotten. I often wonder if he had that fear of becoming the next Sanji once he "died" (he's the only one genuinely asking if Sanji died on them before Yonji and Ichiji say they don't care) because his role is not as noticeable as the others. Reiju is the woman, Ichiji is the successor, Sanji is the weakling getting bullied (being technically one of the little siblings but still being in a limbo of middle/youngest because the little one is Yonji), and Yonji is the little one. Then... What's Niji?

Niji needs Sanji way more than he's willing to admit, and I love that. I absolutely love how he's written because he constantly shows that he needs Sanji, through both words and actions. He needs him because without Sanji's existence -without Niji being his bully- Niji is nothing but number 2. And there's nothing more frustrating than being the number two when it comes to family hierarchy. Not going to mention every little thing he does, but as I said, I love how well-written he is. He's the sibling Oda uses the most to show the abuse Sanji went through, but that's only because Niji is the only one who needs to do that. Niji is the one to talk to Sanji first, all the damn time. He gets angry when Sanji doesn't respond. He gets angry because Sanji can't be bullied anymore. He gets angry out of fear, in my opinion, because if the weakling can't get abused anymore, then he's not worth anything. If Sanji isn't the third, the second one is left alone. 2 can't fight 1 because 1 has the protection of starting the line. And 2 can't fight 4 because there's a missing link that keeps 2 from 4. So Niji is mad at Sanji because Sanji isn't the same weak crybaby he used to be, and he can't use him anymore to be secure and safe.

That's fucking horrifying when it comes to family hierarchy.

I like Niji because, despite being an asshole, he has reasons to be like that. First of all, because his father literally made him this way. But also, the little feelings he has (selfish emotions, yes, evil. But they're feelings, anyway. Urges. He's supposed to be emotionless and yet he knows how Sanji feels enough to use that to his advantage) are used as a way to feel superior and safe because he feels inferior. I think he's the one showing more emotions out of the three, even if those emotions aren't healthy or good and it's just him being angry all the time. That means that if he has urges and needs like that, even if he doesn't fear his own death, he could end up developing more and more empathy. His type of empathy comes from a place of fear. He feels what Sanji feels. And it's not that he doesn't care (I mean, I am aware that he technically doesn't, but let me dream) but it's just convenient for him not to care and keep bullying him to secure his place in the family.

Also pointing out that I like Niji because, being the one who says he hates Sanji the most, he's the one to protect him with his own body when that scene of the siblings helping Sanji escape happens. The others only clear the way, Niji stays with him. There's a really cool post about this on Niji's tag somewhere!!! I personally think he does this because, as that post said: Niji keeps seeing Sanji as weak, instead of believing in him enough to just clear the way. He protects him because he thinks he can't protect himself. Because he's weak.

And yes, it might sound offensive and emotionless and it doesn't make Niji a better person. But it makes him an older brother. Believing in Sanji would be great, but thinking that he's weak and needs protection after years of projecting on him only shows that the weak one is Niji. That he wants and is willing to protect his brother, too. If he didn't care about his well-being he would've just cleared the way for him, not caring about what could've happened to Sanji. But he goes all the way to help him out and protect him longer than the others did. Idk. I find that a very beautiful way of ending their relationship.

All of this being said, I have to be honest with you: When I said I liked Niji for the first time I only did it because people around me kept saying he was the worst one and it bothered me because I found his design pretty fucking cool. And tbh when he started being an actual character? I loved him even more. Because during WCI he's a fucking asshole but the way he acts towards Sanji is wanting to get a response from him, and I just find that so curious and complex... Like, if he just wanted to be evil he'd be more the Doflamingo type. But Niji looks for a response in Sanji's eyes. He wants to feel powerful because he knows he isn't.

And also, well, he's very cute and I like his hair a lot and he makes me furious sometimes which is great because if a character doesn't make you want to punch him at one point, is he really a good character? Look at him! He deserves to get slapped in the face. But also, I would love to kiss him afterward. What's that Olivia Rodrigo lyric? Ah, yes: "I wanna break his heart, then be the one to stitch it up. Wanna kiss his face with an uppercut." That's how I feel about him.

I really hope it's obvious, with all of this, that "Succession" is one of my favorite TV Shows, because I could go on and on and on (and nobody would listen but idc) about how the Vinsmokes are just the Roy family. Both One Piece and Succession deal with family in which hierarchy is crucial in a very specific and accurate way. It makes me sick. I love it.

Anyway, have some pics of my blue idiot:

I want to hit him in the head with a baseball bat.

[scekrex]

I know there's a fandom thing going around that Adam doesn't like eating women out but.... bro I need to see trans! male! reader sitting on Adams face and getting eaten out... like..

I mean reader doesn't count cause he's a guy?? right?? it's not the same guys.. (I mean this in like Adams POV)

I also think it'd be silly if Adam WAS inexperienced in that.. category. Like, bro I want to humiliate him SO BAD!! I love his big ass ego but that makes me want to do it more.. So maybe the reader degrading him or talking Abt how inexperienced he is just to get on Adams nerves while he's eating him out?? I think it'd be silly.. Adam would fold if he was ever degraded or something by the reader, I mean he was constantly praised for being the first man, and was given a lot of special treatment so for the reader to make it CLEAR that he won't be the same way?? YES!! anyway I'm a little hungry for Adam guys sorry <3

Tbh I haven't heard of that headcanon yet but while I agree that Adam would not eat a woman out, he'd definitely suck dick and eat out trans dudes idc what everyone else says. To Adam it's just sometimes different to pleasure a dude with his mouth and I stand by that.

Suck it up, big boy

pairing: Adam x trans!male!reader

warnings: language, oral sex, no use of female privates though (it's briefly implied that reader has a biological female body though)

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

He tried to play it cool, tried to kill the voices in his head that were trying to tell him to pull away and tell you no. He was aware he could stop this at any given point, that you would not give him shit for doing so but he wanted to prove a point. He had bragged a little too much about knowing all the right ways to make you cum, he had dug his own grave when you had brought up that he could simply eat you out then and he had confidently responded with a cocky, ‘Yeah, no fucking problem’.

So when you lowered your hips until you sat on his face and Adam’s mind went completely blank, he wanted to fucking die again - for good this time though. He wanted to melt into the mattress and never come back. Fuck, why did you have to bring up the one thing he had just done once before and back then he had not fucking enjoyed it at all. Maybe that had been due to his partner being quite insensitive about him being inexperienced - you were different in any way and he knew that. It was also an entire different deal to eat a dude out, right? That was not comparable to eating out a woman despite you and his former female partners sharing the same sexual organs. Eating you out would be different, you were not a woman, you were a dude after all, just like Adam himself. Slowly the heavy fog that had clouded his mind lifted and he opened his mouth to let his tongue lick over your front entrance, a quiet moan fell from your lips and that encouraged Adam to keep going.

You were not able to hide the grin that had curled around your lips in victory. You had known it from the start, Adam had not the slightest idea what he was doing down there and for the first time ever since the both of you had started dating, your roles were reversed. For the first time it was Adam who had to learn how to please you instead of the other way around and you had to admit that you liked the thought of it a lot. And despite having no experience, he was trying his best - not that you’d let it slide that easily though. “I fucking knew you were all talk,” you hummed as you grinded your hips down against his face, your body tried to swallow his tongue but it seemed that Adam had other plans since he kept withdrawing it. Either he had other plans or he had no idea what he was supposed to do with himself. You were quick to notice the flinch that went through his body at your comment - the first man was used to a lot of your shit by now, degradation was not one of them. You felt how he wanted to pull back to argue and decided it was for the best to not let him, if he would need a serious break he’d let you know. “Don’t fucking talk about how good you are with your dirty mouth, Adam, show me instead,” you explained as you held his head in place by grabbing a fistful of his brown hair tightly, a needy moan rolled over Adam’s tongue and was sent right through your body.

The brunette’s tongue kept circling your entrance and you impatiently yanked on his hair as you growled, “Just fucking use your oh so magical tongue, dickmaster.” The nickname that usually sounded like a praise coming from your lips now sounded taunting and Adam was overwhelmed by the realization that he in fact liked it. His body reacted by bucking his hips up into thin air. Your free hand slapped his hip bone harshly before you pressed it against the mattress, “Behave, whore, you won’t cum until I taught you how to eat a man out properly.” And your words that sounded like a promise and a threat at the same time made his body shiver in excitement and another moan - this one was a little lower - fell from his lips.

With a shift of your hips your body was finally able to swallow Adam’s tongue and the choking noise that the brunette made at the sudden shift was music to your ears. “For your bragging about how good you are at this you’re pretty fucking weak, hun,” oh and you loved the way his body reacted to your mean sounding comments, the way his hips pressed up against the palm pinning it down, the way his hands - which were loosely holding your hips to keep them busy - would clench, nails digging into your skin to keep himself grounded. His golden eyes were open the entire time, scanning your body and its very move. “You’ve never done that before and it fucking shows,” you moaned as you kept grinding your hips against his face, trying to get is tongue to touch all the right areas, without him knowing where those are that turned out to be more tricky than you would have thought though. “Really thought I wouldn’t notice that you’re basically still a virgin when it comes to eating someone out, huh?” And that word - virgin - made Adam’s walls crumble, never in his entire life had someone called him that, let alone told him that he fucks like one. A high pitched whine left his throat and that sound you liked even more than the choking noise he had made earlier. “And someone like you dares to call himself dickmaster,” you huffed as the hand that had been busy with pinning his hips against the mattress teasingly ghosted over Adam’s erection, the brunette was quick to try and lean into your offering touch instantly. A muffled, “Fuck,” came from the man underneath you - well, at lest that was what Adam tried to say, the sound that actually left his lips sounded a little different. Not that either of you cared, no not really.

“Move your tongue to the right- no the other right, boo- oh fuck,” instructions he could definitely take and execute quite well despite the fact that he had been in a leading position his entire afterlife - he was the leader of the exorcists after all, not a really a position that would teach a person to execute orders well. Yet Adam did what you told him to do and earned himself a throaty moan of yours in return. “Look at the inexperienced bitch finally learning how to eat- oh dear God~” your degrading little comment was cut off by Adam thrusting his tongue all the way inside of you, licking down the inside of your walls and swallowing the liquid your body produced due to the lust flowing through your veins. Fuck, he surely had caught on quickly, huh? You felt the shiteating grin that you were sitting on and you did not like it - well, that was only partly true. You did like it that he seemed to grow more confident in his task, you did not like the control that took from you so the fist of yours that was still buried in his hair tightened in a warning manner. Adam’s hands grabbed a proper hold of your hips and slightly lifted them off his face to respond to your lust filled cry of Father’s name, “Not quite, but I’ll let it slide.” The fist in his hair tightened even more, then you yanked on the sweaty mess on his head firmly, drawing a beautiful sounding moan from your lover as you yanked his face closer to your privates again.

“Shut the fuck up and swallow, bitch,” you bit back a little harsher than you had intented to, but you knew Adam would not take that personally at all - if anything he would comment on it later how hot it was. His eyes locked onto yours as he continued to eat you out, the tongue of the first man was moving so skillfully by now, like it was his second nature, like he had been practicing this ever since he had been created. You knew better than anyone that wasn’t the case though. Moan after moan fell from your lips and the brunette underneath you drowned in the sounds you made for him, drowned in the thought of your body craving his just as much as his body was craving yours. Why was he so fucking good at this? He surely had no right to be, not when he was oh so inexperienced. You wanted to keep the dirty talk and therefore the degradation up but you had not enough air inside your lungs to do so, not when Adam kept drawing those beautiful sounds from you.

[ryuichirou]

RE: Ortho (+Shroudcest) post replies

Phew, alright, I think I didn’t skip anyone. If I did, I’m sorry, I’ll reply to you next time then!

Thank you so much for your wonderful messages of support and for your takes. I really appreciate it! I say it all the time but it saying it again feels appropriate: we had no idea we would ever see so many people who share our point of view despite not shipping Ortho with Idia or any other character. The fact that we can have this conversation really makes me happy.

You are welcome to share more of your thoughts if you want, but unfortunately I might not be able to reply to everyone. I will do my best though.

All of the asks in this blog are related to this post.

Anonymous asked:

Different anon, I think Ortho is in this nebulous situation like superboy in young justice who is physically 16 years old but chronologically 16 weeks old. I genuinely hate the uwu babying of characters. The dwarfs are all second years(so theoretically 17 at the youngest) but no one makes anything with them. Heck the characters I see get lewded the most are the octo trio who are the same age.

Heck, even Grim gets the baby mascot treatment by fans when he's also lumpedwiththefirst years. Like yes, he's a whiny brat but he's also grown up all alone as far as he can remember. I can't help but compare him to Puppycat who acts similarly and is a grown ass man.

Yeah, this probably plays a role too! Ironically, we were just having this conversation about Stitch the other day lol Being new to the world you exist in (and to existing in general) and being a baby aren’t necessarily the same thing.

And even in that case Ortho doesn’t fully fit into the trope because he was created quite a while ago and is already pretty well adjusted. But since he is still learning and doesn’t always understand people + doesn’t always get things like sarcasm, people consider it to be a proof that he is a toddler lol Who am I kidding, their reasoning doesn’t even go that far. They say “he died when he was a baby therefore he is a baby forever” and call it a day.

I feel bad for people who love Grim, I haven’t even thought about it… The Puppycat comparison is so spot-on lol

Grim is inexperienced and doesn’t know much about the world, but yes, he is one of the freshmen + just as he at times acts like a whiny brat, there are also times when he tells Ace that he should be more considerate of Deuce’s feelings, like wtf was that? That was Grim. Because Grim also isn’t a baby, he is a furry gremlin…

Anonymous asked:

As one of the most avid Ortho stans, it really is a pet peeve that people act like he's a little kid

You're so right that it's people that want to write him like Idia's little convenient plot device

I do want to note that it's also sometimes just the infantilization of an autistic coded character

God forbid he be somewhat optimistic, this must mean he's just an innocent baby /s

One small thing that gets me: Ortho can and has made his own gears!! Idia doesn't need to and maybe this is inspired by a post I saw that used the fact that Idia has made his stuff to take away Ortho's agency in what is supposed to be him having a tattoo analog. Not having a character be the architect of their own body mod equivalent is wild and I just.

He's a silly little guy, but he's not a fucking baby!

Indeed, Anon. I feel like people either completely ignore Ortho or see him as Idia’s appendix. I absolutely love them together, and of course I am biased towards scenarios that focus on their deep codependence, but I also really love how they get to have their own adventures, their own relationship, their own experiences separate from each other. Because they are wow, different characters, and Ortho has his own agency. He had it even before ch6, but after that he fully and officially became his own person. Being with Idia is his choice, not his only option. And just like you mentioned, he makes his own gears pretty much all the time now… even though I don’t agree that Idia making his gears has anything to do with Ortho’s agency.

I don’t even think Ortho is that optimistic. He is a little sunshine, but not even close to people like Kalim for example. Ortho even has his own cynical moments and douchy moments that people also tend to ignore. But even if he was 100% optimistic and naïve, it still would not be a valid reason to infantilise him. And you are absolutely right, people do that a lot. With Kalim too, actually, now that I think about it.

Anonymous asked:

Aaaaah, Ryuichi, after reading your post (rant) about Ortho, made me very happy! I'm glad there's someone else who shares the same opinion. The number of fans who infantilizes Ortho is beyond me. I absolutely hate the argument Ortho's mentally "8 years old" it's like they completely forget his storyline.

I'm guessing that the people who genuinely believe the theory that he's "8 years old" are younger fans with no media literacy so no hate towards them but it's frustrating when fans pretend it's Canon when it's not.

Not only that but it’s so sad to see how he's also so mischaracterized by the fandom. He's always seen just as Idia's little brother but never himself despite the fact that Ortho's life doesn't revolve around Idia. He has his own interest and hobbies different from Idia AND he is NOT innocent! Fans tend to forget this is a game about a school full of villains and that includes Ortho too! If I remember correctly Ortho has multiple times tried to blow up the school with his laser! He's violent! He's not a kid.

Unfortunately, I've seen this kind of stuff happening across all fandoms this isn't exclusive to Twisted wonderland. Heck a few months ago I've seen fans in the black butler genuinely believe that Ciel's in fact 9 years old instead of 13 year old!? And then they call us weird? The SebaCiel shippers? Like why do YOU want him to be younger?? I'm getting too old for this.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy you also agree.

I don’t hate younger fans, and I know that some people might be genuinely confused; but I also believe that there are a lot of people that simply do not care about Ortho’s actual story and any arguments one could make about this case. The actual issue isn’t Ortho being a certain age, it’s a pretext, an excuse, an invitation to harass. If Ortho didn’t exist, they would still do it with other characters, and even if all the characters were adults, they would still find a reason to do so, like, for example, their appearance. There is no winning in this game, this is why factual arguments won’t work even if Ortho Shroud himself looks in the camera and says “hi, I don’t care if people ship me with my niisan, I am also in fact not 8 years old”.

I am also very glad you mentioned Ortho being his own person! I mentioned it in a previous reply, so I won’t talk about it, but yes, you are absolutely right. Ortho is a menace, and all of his disappointed “come ooon, niisan, don’t do that” moments come from his desire for Idia to have more friends, not because he genuinely cares for other people. He clearly doesn’t – hence his multiple attempts to blow up the school lol

I love it when characters just keep getting younger with every single wave of this shitstorm. Didn’t you know he is 13? How dare you post something like that about a 9 years old! He is a toddler who is only 3 months old! That’s one powerful fountain of youth right there. Antis in Kuroshitsuji fandom do that a lot, just as antis in TWST fandom.

Anonymous asked:

I really feel bad for people who have Ortho as their oshi. It's not like fans of other characters don't get shit on too, apparently pretty much everyone is an immoral heathen these days, but I feel like Ortho gets often excluded in fan content, especially when it features any mature theme.

Also, if you a problem with people liking Ortho in the same way as they do with the rest of the guys, you should take your issues to the creators, since that was definitely their intention when they put him in the pretty boy gacha. Or maybe just play another game.

Anyway Ryu and Katsu, keep doing your thing, cause you guys are awesome!

What I love about it is that Ortho himself would be so pissed if he learned that all the other guys get to do fun mature stuff and he doesn’t lol That’s so not fair, he’s charging his lasers as we speak!

Also yes, it was absolutely the creators’ intention. He is supposed to look like that, just like Lilia is supposed to look like that – both caused confusion in the game story with how young they look, and yet both are a big part of the cast (+ As we know, even Idia was supposed to be younger looking…). Ortho has one of the biggest amounts of cards, he is clearly a popular character, not just a lovely addition or a mascot. 

Thank you so much for your support, Anon <3 It means a lot. This shit might be upsetting, but it will never stop us from creating.

Anonymous asked:

While I am not an Ortho/Idia shipper, I do like your art pieces because your art style is straight-up gorgeous. So when I do see your Shroudcest art Im like: not my cup of tea but I respect the time and effort made into this. (And here is my rant siding with you bc they are fictional characters)

The babyfication of Ortho is something I do not understand. As much as Idia made RoBro in trauma, rn I doubt he wants RoBro to remain stagnant in mind and hardware. With Ortho's ability to learn, he is practically a teenager like the rest. He displays more emotional maturity than most ppl despite his killer laser beam. Kindness, hope, and optimism are traits not limited to children. Shortness is also not limited to children. If we treat other characters by traits often shared by children, then Neige's fellow dwarf classmates are also children. What they don't count bc they are not human? Ortho is not human either. Similarly, Kalim and Silver display positive internal traits of kindness, hope, and optimism. Shortness? Well, we got Grandpa Lilia and the Napoleon complex twins Riddle and Epel. They are all teenagers (minus Lilia) and no one is babying them.

...And are we ignoring all the shit he has seen on the internet. The amount of porn (from adult sites and even the soft-core types you can even find by watching some twitch/yt streamers) that can be seen. Videos of violence, crimes, and ppl doing their best to win the Darwainism Award. Ortho could access and go through like 5 terebytes by the time I reach page two of Google.

As for the Shroudcest, they are fictional characters! You can go straight to phub and have incest type (the sheer amount of the step family porn troupe) porn being acted out by actual breathing people. Do you want to metaphorically die on this hill of ppl shipping fictional 2D characters? Are we just going to ignore you targeting this harmless ship? At least go for a larger target like Game of Thrones or House of Dragons. So much incest in those media that it has it's own fan wiki page, but you don't see ppl go for George R. R. Martin's throat for writing about characters willing or unknowingly committing incest.

It is like people reading/watching media of horror movie killers. It's something you can enjoy or have a preference for because you, as a sane person, will not become a serial killer. AND, as a productive member of society, you condemn actual, real-life serial killers. You read horror stories or watch scary movies for entertainment value not for a guide to be one. Similar logic to furries. Furries consider anthropomorphic creatures as hot, but those same furries are against beastilaity.

TL;DR: While I am not personally a fan of incest or shota type of media, I do not mind they exist (or go after creators who use FICTIONALLY characters to enhance their form of FICTIONAL media), bc they are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS from a FICTIONAL MEDIA. Stop with the performative activism. Use that effort and go after people who do it for real in real life. If you prevent/stop an actual crime from happening, I will applaud and thank you! AND I DOUBT I WILL BE THE ONLY ONE.

Thank you so much, Anon! I am happy that you like my stuff despite not shipping some of our ships. I am very grateful for the respect, and also for your message! I really like your points and I’ll go through them briefly.

The entire part about all those traits not being exclusive to children + about other characters having those traits but still not being babied – YES, thank you so much for that. Like I already mentioned, the game clearly plays with those tropes, and even though the characters are young-looking, they are still of high school age (other than Lilia). Ortho is weird, Ortho is different from some of the other boys, but all of them are weird in their own way, Ortho is just a robot. If we can make “not a human” excuse for the dwarves, why can’t we look at Ortho that way? And yes, Ortho absolutely knows stuff a kid wouldn’t be able to digest lol All of his difficulties come from him being an AI – he doesn’t always get sarcasm, he doesn’t fully understand why people do certain things and doesn’t understand some limitations of human’s body and mind; none of it is tied to him being childish or too innocent.

Incest in media is very popular indeed, and it’s SUPER popular in porn! You are right. If any kind of media ends up “normalising” this kind of relationship, it definitely won’t be shippers of incest. But also that won’t happen because wow, it doesn’t work that way. People love to say that fiction affects reality, and while in a way it does, it’s never a “everyone is going to start shooting people because the videogames brainwashed them” type of deal, and this is exactly what they’re doing with their arguments. It’s fear-mongering, moralism and ignoring the fact that people do in fact know how to separate fiction from reality. And the key to making sure no one is going to jump out the window because their favourite character did so isn’t in censorship, but in people learning this difference and always keeping in it mind. Ironically, that would mean that people who harass others over cartoons can’t make this separation very well because of their lack of critical consumption of media; but then again, they can’t even see (and don’t care, which makes it worse and my point stronger) how their own reckless actions seriously affect real people in real life, and I think this is a more important issue to resolve lol

Unfortunately, people who prefer performative activism very rarely end up becoming real activists, but I do hope that they will at least find some other hobby, something that doesn’t cause so much harm to both innocent people and the cause they claim to be fighting for.

I got a bit carried away there, but yeah, I totally agree with your point, and once again grateful for your understanding. There will always be media that makes you uncomfortable – and that’s the beauty of it. Creativity is a boundless ocean and no amount of bricks can contain it.

Anonymous asked:

I was just scrolling through and saw your explanation of ortho and shroudcest the other day. As tiring as I’m sure it is, it always gives me hope to see people who remember what shipping is really about. I mean problematic content has existed all through human mythos and history, and society still survives! According to the studies the “art morality” argument is roughly the same as “but da violent games!!” Argument, or metal music, or clothes, or any other form of media deemed ‘new’ or ‘too different’.

Anyway, I don’t ship cest stuff myself but your art is lovely and it’s become one of the things I can view without feeling uncomfy despite how my head usually responds to such content (woohoo free therapy??? /j)

I ship ortho with an OC who’s also 16. Said oc’s mother said she would never treat her child differently for who they choose to love, and while she definitely wasn’t expecting a robot, she’s not going back on her word.

Thank you so much, Anon!! YES, this is exactly what shipping is all about! It feels like “umm but they’re not even canon” type of people are suddenly the majority in fandom spaces ahhh lol

As long as art exists, there will always be people who are against it, especially if it’s something niche, and despite how popular fandoms are, all of the fandom activity is a niche, ESPECIALLY shipping, ESPECIALLY this kind of shipping. So unfortunately it’s unavoidable, but it’s so useless and annoying!

I am very happy that you like our stuff. Thank you for enjoying it. Your OC’s mother is amazing and very supportive lol I am sure she and Ortho will get along swimmingly.

[atmymercy]

Thank you very much for answering my request about Jihyo twice, I’m scared to be greedy but can you read about Yun sung bin also he the man who date Jihyo now so can you read about his feelings towards her I’m curious about him cause I didn’t see a lot reading for his feelings too so if this possible please read about him ( I’m sorry for bothering you and thanks again 🤎

♡ celebrity gg corner ♡

aww! it was my pleasure, honey! thanks for coming back and saying thank you! i appreciate that! woot! psh! i don't mind! i read once that gossip can have a positive effect because it grows our sense of community and caring for others! so happy to partake in some fun gossip with you! woot! lol

but of course, let's not be greedy! we don't want to step into territories where we grow the negative effect of gossip either! lol but it's all about that balance! and doing another can't hurt since we're already on the topic and it does seem right to get the pair done together! lol

and yeah, you wouldn't see a lot about his feelings in the last reading since jihyo was our focal point for the last reading! the queen goes first! lol

may the celebrity we are getting a reading about today have a good day! we only wish the best of vibes when we do celebrity gg corner but obviously, the truth is what we seek! woot! (i thought i would start doing a blessing for the celebrity beforehand so they know we come with good intentions!)

for your entertainment, i got the 4 of swords, 4 of cups, 9 of coins, 4 of wands & the lovers.

interesting! look at all this four energy everwhere with them! okay! so he loves her! he adores her! he wants to be able to bag her, honestly! he would want to marry her and slow down her whole life! because he wants to be able to keep her almost to himself! to protect her from the world! to give her all the finest things and for her to not have to work anymore! wow! there's a lot of feelings he has going on when it comes to her! i see why they burn so hot and heavy for each other! he misses her when she's not around and he worries about letting her down because a lot is expected of her and of her lover aka him! he doesn't like to worry her or make her life harder. he tries to not complain about how busy and hectic her life is. he tries to stay on the lighter side of life for her so she doesn't get anxious. it's nearly impossible to avoid though because they just feel less stable when they're not together. it's giving a sense of home to each other for sure. i'm totally seeing the princess treatment for her too when it comes to how he treats her!

hope you enjoyed it! please give feedback or buy me a coffee/tip when you can! if you want to explore this further, please also consider a private read. also thank you for sharing with me!♡

love & light!

-tea

♡ message me for details/questions & to book this reading! ♡

[camaro-and-smokes]

Nightmares

Chapter 6: Eddie

No warnings for this chapter. Just some more good old angst (honestly this whole fic is angst, don't know why I even bother to point it out lol). Notes: It seems that I'm able to get out a chapter every three months... Well, it's more than no chapters at all I guess :D Moodboard by the ever so talented @a-redharlequin 💜

Read on AO3 >>

Summary: The morning before Eddie is leaving for the hospital for his treatment is gloomy.

::::::::::

For once Eddie didn’t have any nightmares. It wasn’t as if they’d suddenly magically disappeared but because he couldn't sleep the whole night. Even though he was sleeping between Billy and Steve. Usually he slept there like a baby, but tonight all he could do was to try to memorize how their breathing sounded like when they slept, what it felt like to press his nose into Billy's neck or how Steve's chest hair tickled when he pressed his cheek against it.

Though he knew he wasn't the only one who was not sleeping well from the way Billy kept tossing and turning. Eddie wanted to calm him, to hug and assure him that he was still here without waking him up. But he knew better than to hug Billy in his sleep, though. What was Eddie's loving hug in real life, in Billy's dreamworld it might be the suffocating squeeze of the mind flayer—and Billy might act accordingly, fight it to teeth and nails. So, Eddie hoped that his body pressed against Billy's and his nose buried into Billy's curls was enough.

“Can’t sleep?” Billy asked a moment later with a hoarse voice.

“No.”

Billy turned around and on his other side, nuzzling his head under Eddie’s jaw, and Eddie wrapped his arms around him.

“You know…” Eddie started.

“Mmh?”

“About the other day. The music.”

Billy was quiet.

Eddie felt a sting in his chest because he knew that Billy was hurting because of what he’d said. “I was having a bad day. Didn’t mean it like that.”

Billy still said nothing.

“I’m sorry, peaches.”

“I get it,” Billy whispered after a while.

Eddie felt something wet on his chest. Tears. “Fuck,” he whispered, the guilt squeezing his chest. He pressed his lips against Billy’s forehead, hardly able to hold back his own tears and hugged him tighter. “Oh, peaches. I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was an idiot.”

For a while Billy just sniffled and Eddie just hugged him, tight, holding on for dear life.

“It’s not just that,” Billy whispered when the tears had eased.

“Yeah, I know,” Eddie whispered, carding Billy’s hair with his fingers.

Billy pulled back and looked at Eddie in the dim light of the night light, examining his features and sliding his finger over Eddie’s nose, lips and chin.

Eddie usually bit the finger by the time it reached his lower lip, causing Billy to yelp, him tickle attacking Billy, one thing leading into another…But today the crease between Billy’s brows was deep and his eyes were sad—and Eddie didn’t feel like teasing Billy either, so he just smiled. “How did I get this lucky?” he asked instead, from no one in particular. “Because I wonder that each and every day.” Now he was the one who couldn’t hold back the tears.

Billy curled his arm around Eddie, and they held each other as they both shed more tears.

Eddie could feel Steve stir behind his back.

He turned around, pressing himself against Eddie and his cheek against Eddie’s neck “Hey, what’s going on?” he asked quietly.

“Mutual pity party,” Eddie tried to lighten up the mood.

“Why wasn’t I invited?” Steve asked as he rubbed his cheek onto Eddie’s neck and snaked his arm between Eddie and Billy.

Eddie knew it was a joke, but it still stung. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Steve whispered.

“As if.”

“Eddie, come on,” Steve scolded him gently, hugging him tighter and sighing. “What if it all works out? What then? All pity partying for nothing. Imagine that. All the wasted sobs and feeling sorry for ourselves…”

Eddie snorted. “Okay, I get it.”

Steve pressed his face into the crook of Eddie’s neck. “Since it seems where all up, maybe we should go for breakfast. What do you think?”

“Sounds good,” both Eddie and Billy confirmed.

Eddie was slumped in his chair, his head pillowed on his arms, observing Billy and Steve who were going about the usual morning routines; Billy by the stove, Steve filling the coffee maker and putting slices of bread into the toaster.

Boring everyday life with his boyfriends. For so long he’d taken this as given, and now he would give a lot to have this moment last just a little bit longer.

Billy was making Eddie’s favorite, scrambled eggs and bacon. It wasn’t that Billy didn’t make it every day anyway, but today there was something different about it. It felt like a last meal, and Eddie didn’t like the notion. In fact, he hated the way his brain concentrated only on the cons of the operation he was about to go through, how he didn’t seem to be able to see the good things it would bring. He was terrified of the whole thing, so he figured it was that why he was so concentrated on what could go wrong instead of what could go right.

When Billy started piling up food on their plates with a smile, Eddie’s gloomy thoughts eased a little.

There was shuffling in the corridor, and they all turned to look at El walking in. “Morning,” she said with a weary smile.

“Slept well?” Steve asked as he went to the cupboard, taking out one more plate.

El nodded and sat next to Eddie on the table. “How are you?” she asked him.

“Hanging on,” Eddie replied.

“It’s going to be alright, I know it.”

“Yeah. Everyone keeps saying that.”

“It’s true. I can feel it. Here,” she said with a smile, placing one hand over her heart and grabbing Eddie’s hand with the other.

Eddie felt the by now familiar lump gathering to his throat. All he could do was to nod and squeeze her hand. It wasn’t that he normally didn’t trust El’s premonitions, this time it was just…too close. Too real, for him. Everyone was right about needing to stay positive, he knew that, but…

“Hey, Bambi,” Billy said as he pushed a plate of eggs, bacon and toast in front of Eddie, “snap out of it and eat.”

Eddie let out a laugh and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “Trust you to keep it real.”

“Just want you to stay in the moment, baby,” Billy replied and brushed Eddie’s cheek with his hand. “’s all we have.”

Steve poured them all cups of coffee and handed out sugar to El, then took out milk from the fridge and splashed it into his own. Billy and Eddie took theirs black.

The atmosphere around the table was gloomy. No one clearly felt like talking, so they munched their breakfast, everyone succumbed to their thoughts.

Finally El broke the silence. “So, Billy, what do you need me to do while I’m here?”

As if they hadn’t figured that all out already before, Eddie thought. But talking it through again was better than sitting in silence.

“Well, driving Steve around, I guess. Help with the groceries. Make sure I remember to take my meds,” Billy said. “Helping if I have a bad day. Going with me wherever I need to go outside the house. That kind of stuff. Just aiding with whatever I might need. I won’t let you touch the stove though,” he continued, grinning towards the end.

“Okay,” El said with a smile. “And what about you, Steve?”

“Uh…well, basically with everything Eddie does. I mean, I will do my part, and help with whatever I can. But when the vertigo hits all of a sudden things get halted and I need to take a break.” Then Steve sighed. “And yes, driving me around, too. You better be ready at six am to drive.”

“I can do that.”

“And…” Steve started and looked at Eddie. “Keep reminding him that everything will work out and that he’ll be back to us. Alive.”

El nudged Eddie’s leg with her knee and smiled. “I can do that, too.”

They talked more about what Billy and Steve could use her help with. About laundry and in general making sure they always had what they needed. Normal everyday chores. Until Eddie would come back and as long as Eddie’s recovery took, both Billy and Steve kept emphasizing that. It made Eddie feel more confident that maybe everything was going to be alright in the end. Even if he maybe didn’t believe it as strongly as they did.

He had a good reason to be sceptical. All previous treatments, tried and experimental, even though always promising a lot, had been unsuccessful in actually healing him. They’d always fell back to just trying to reduce the viral load at least for a while, because nothing else had worked even that much in the end.

And now this would shut down the last bits of his of his own immune system. If this didn’t work, then no one knew if anything ever would again.

“Hey, Earth to Bambi, again,” Billy said, snapping his fingers in front of Eddie.

“Ah, what?” Eddie said, blinking and looking at Billy.

“You went all glassy eyed there for a moment. Don’t need you to go there.”

Eddie looked back at his half-eaten eggs, nodding and prodding them with his fork. “Sorry, I’m not really hungry anymore.”

Billy smiled softly and reached out his hand over the table to place it on Eddie’s. “’s alright, baby. We get it.”

After breakfast Billy and El were left to finish cleaning the kitchen while Eddie and Steve went to check on the last things Eddie needed to take with him.

There wasn’t much. He’d already packed earlier accordingly to Dr. Owens’ guidelines. There was no real need for his own clothes since he’d be in isolation for the first few weeks and was provided everything from the hospital. And he’d given Owens lists of what he’d want to do and listen to while in isolation.

+ + +

Owens’ face had been worth seeing when he’d gone through Eddie’s list for books he wanted to read and music he wanted to listen to. “You have quite a list here.”

“Yeah. If I can’t play, I can at least listen to music and read. Those are just the ones I haven’t read. Yet.”

“You read a lot?”

“Around 50 books a year. More or less. Haven’t kept count lately.”

“And the music…I haven’t heard of any of these before. ‘Symphony for Destruction’? Sounds quite menacing.”

“Well, that album is more critique about destruction than provocation to it,” Eddie replied with a tilt of his head.

Owens nodded without a word. After a while he said, “We’ll make sure we have all this when you come in. But you know, we can organize basically anything you want here, more than this.” He paused for a moment, smiling sadly. “It’s going to be tough as it is. We don’t want to make it any worse. We just need to disinfect everything early enough.”

Eddie looked at his hands. “Yeah.” Then he looked back up. “I’ll provide a list of all the things I could do while I’m here.”

+ + +

The mood was gloomy for the rest of the morning and during the quiet drive to the hospital.

Owens was waiting for them at the reception of the hospital. “Hello, Eddie,” he said, “and Billy and Steve. Nice to see you two again, too.” He was surprised to see El with them. His smile widened at the sight of her and he asked, “How are you, El?”

As they started walking towards the elevators, El nodded with a small smile. “I’m fine, thank you. Helping Billy and Steve while Eddie stays here.”

“Right. Well, that makes sense. How are your studies?”

“Alright. I’m getting the practical part covered with this.”

“Well, that’s good.” He looked at Billy and Steve. “You two are in good hands.”

“Um, could you walk us through the procedure once more?” Steve asked in the elevator.

“Sure,” Owens replied. “It’s quite straightforward. We administer the drug straight into the nervous system in a rapid succession. This might have a severe impact on the immune system which is the main reason we keep Eddie here during the treatment but of course because we need to see the drug also in action. Then we wait for the results. When Eddie’s immune system has recovered enough, he’ll be ready to go home.” Owens glanced at Eddie. “We hope that he can leave the hospital as soon as possible but it’s impossible to say at this stage when it could be. It could be in a week or then in a month or two. The drug is experimental and Eddie is unfortunately the first human Guinea pig.”

“So the results from previous stages have been promising?”

“They have,” Owens nodded with a small smile. He paused, clearly to choose his words carefully. “Let’s be honest here, because I know you all appreciate that. The results have been promising with rats but a human is a whole different animal. And Eddie isn’t having a cancer, he’s having a virus that’s been impossible to kill so far. But since this drug has killed some of the nastiest viruses as a side effect, we’re trying it on him.”

“Because there’s nothing to lose,” Steve continued while looking at Eddie to whom Billy was clutching. “How many rats survived the killing of the nasty viruses?”

“More than died. But not by much.”

A heavy silence fell over them for the rest of the way up to the research labs.

When they arrived in the floor and stepped out of the elevator, Owens turned to Eddie. “This is the final stop for the rest of you for now. It’s just me and Eddie from here onward. Eddie, are you ready?”

Eddie nodded. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

Billy had been tangled with Eddie the whole drive, both of them just wanting to be close to each other, and Billy had managed to remain without crying. But now the tears poured on his cheeks uncontrollably.

Eddie hugged him, running his other hand through his hair, pressing him against him as close as he could. And Billy returned the gesture. “Peaches,” Eddie whispered. “We’ll talk every day, alright? You can call me any time, day or night.”

Billy nodded into the crook of Eddie’s neck, letting out a quiet sob.

“I love you. You’re my everything. Never forget that,” Eddie whispered, meaning the words maybe even more than he ever had before.

Since Billy wouldn’t let go of him, Eddie gestured to Steve to join them for a hug.

“I’m going to miss you,” Steve said quietly as he wrapped his other arm around Billy and the other around Eddie’s waist. “We’ll come see you as much as they let us. All you need to do is fight.”

Eddie took a deep breath of both Steve’s and Billy’s scent. “I will,” he whispered back, tightening his hug on them both. “I love you both.”

“We love you too,” Steve said, pressing his lips against Eddie’s cheek.

It wasn’t a kiss exactly, but it was more than Eddie had ever gotten from Steve outside sex. It made the moment bittersweet. That it took this high a stake for Steve to finally show Eddie was important maybe in other ways too than just on a family level. He pulled back a little from Steve and looked at him, mouthing ‘I love you’.

Steve did the same, and it made Eddie feel bold enough to carefully lean towards him, his lips slightly parted, asking for a permission to kiss him.

Steve leaned in the rest of the way to meet Eddie’s lips.

Eddie melted from inside. There was no doubt in his mind that he couldn’t fight for this. Knowing that he didn’t have just a half of the deal waiting for him on the other side—but all of it.