#it's like 8 bucks and I read comics too so it's worth it
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Teen Titans 1x01 Blind Reaction
I haven’t watched the OG Teen Titans yet. Sue me. I wasn’t allowed to watch cartoons as a kid so I’m playing catch-up here. As usual, spoilers and cursing under the cut! Also. apologies for the short sentences, it was like 3 am.
A disclaimer: This is entirely for fun and a lot of the comments I make are based on my preferences for media as well as the way I, as a writer, would have written things.
If I say something you disagree with (more likely in my analysis posts than my reactions) then I am more than happy to hear your opinions so long as you are respectful!
If you followed me for Detroit Evolution content I promise I’ll post the rest soon. Formatting and proofreading takes ages. I also might start liveblogging my adventures in screenwriting so look out for that!
That being said, let’s get into it!
[In brackets is added post-watch.]
Holy old animation Batman. It feels like Phineas and Ferb.
BB Sounds like Phineas.
The cheesy intro tho
Seriously which Robin is this cause I think it’s Dick but Idk
“Titans Go!”
The theme song is iconic
Love the OG Raven design
Is the theme Japanese?? It kinda feels Japanese
I love that Starfire’s outfit isn’t like literally a bikini it’s nice since she’s designed like a sixteen year old
Epic fight scene™️. Makes me feel like something’s going to go wrong.
“I am stronger than I look” fuck yeah Star get his ass
Honestly wtf Rob you’re like twelve and you don’t have powers??? Also is he wearing steel toe boots?? I thought they were converse at first. Seriously Batman, what’s with the child soldiers??
Cyborg?? I love him
Ouch that was a fail
Ok the bo staff is a Tim Drake signature as far as I know so wtf???? Which black haired mf is this???
It’s Dick. I googled. [I love DC and I realize that most of the Robins were designed before having diverse characters was a thing but literally they all look the same. Like personally I’d love to see a Romani or other non-white rep for Dick.
{I gleefully return to this post with news that Dick is canonically Romani! He’s been played so often as white, including in the new Titans, which I will be making a post about, but he was confirmed to be poc in Devin Grayson’s Gotham Knights. He’s part Romani on his mother’s side. She, according to Tim Seeley’s twitter, is an immigrant. He was originally presented without a confirmed ethnicity! My apologies for being uninformed about this. I stated Romani specifically here before knowing because I had seen people talk about him as such and really enjoyed it.}
Maybe a mixed Jason? I feel like Tim is white mostly bc he’s rich IN GOTHAM,,, but like I never turn down the possibility of poc characters. Damian is canonically middle eastern so if I ever see a live action Damian not played by a middle eastern brown kid I’m rioting.]
What a petulant child. Blaming each other. Now they’re fighting. [This part feels very overdramatic to me personally. I do think that if this wasn’t animated it would be toned down quite a bit. That being said? I do think it’s in character for Dick, especially late Robin-era Dick, to have outbursts like that, especially as a character that I see as needing a lot of control.]
Oh wonderful. He quit. That’s overly dramatic.
Oh goddamn it Slade.
I’m not supposed to know he’s Slade yet tho huh. [Rip the element of surprise with that, I have a habit of learning everything from things before investing my time in it, and my obsession with other versions of DC comics isn’t helpful in this situation. Also the 25 pages of AO3 I’ve read about the Bats gives quite a bit away.]
Oh ew that’s a plasma monster
He looks like fuckin,,, Underbelly! that mf from the Red Hood/Arsenal comics. [Underbelly is the personification of the criminal world. I got through four RH/A comics as of posting this so once I finish that storyline I’ll probably post about it]
“It’s pointless to get upset about Cyborg” breaks glass. [I personally really fw Raven being like ‘master of meditation i feel nothing’ but then these dumbasses get all up in her brain and she ends up loving them like honestly that’s amazing]
“I’m fine” fucks up that punching bag. Master of emotions this bitch. [I don’t think that this little tantrum is entirely because Cyborg left. Again, Dick was raised by Batman, and neither of them are too good about losing control and fucking up. This to me is very much a mix of guilt for having driven away a friend and teammate, anger at Cyborg for leaving, and also anger at himself for a perceived failure. Bruce really needs to get his kids therapy bc the complexes are really shining through.]
Now they’re sad like bitch ur the one who kicked him out???
He’s eating something and it’s gross.
“That stuff can’t be good for you” Robin,,, sweaty,,,
The puns. Jeez Louise.
Immensely powerful half demon lady and the best you can do is some cans?? [Again with the things you shouldn’t know, Theo. Yeah I get that she’s still a kid and the demon lady thing isn’t exactly revealed yet, but I maintain that the barrels -- which I realized that they’re barrels not cans -- could be improved upon]
“You giant zit”??? A Child [Seriously how old is he because it’s concerning that he seems as young as he does. @ Bruce wtf did you do to your kids]
Phase three what an ominous asshole
Again with the puns Rob like jeez just fight this mf
Star,, you’re an alien?? Why are you screaming??
Both eyes on the road while flying Raven
He just extends the bo again bro what kinda bat bullshit is this
Cyborg saving the day!! We gotta love that. “Still got the sonic if you still got the boom” what kids I love them
I love that he just,, brought Cinderblock with him. He’s just that powerful.
Wtf is up with this knockoff Alfred mf with Slade? Also?? What stereotypical villain shit Slade step it up. [Titans (2018) Slade is like,,, so much better at this. Hell, even Arrow Slade is more nefarious.]
[I know it’s stupid to say this about an antagonist from a kids show vs two YA/Adult shows but like?? Titans Slade had the Motive, and Arrow Slade was Deep. In my defense here, I’m only on Ep 1, I’m sure he gets more interesting as the show progresses.
My non-sleep deprived rating? 9/10. Points off for melodrama but points on for nostalgia and attention grabbing. I’m not really into kids shows so I did my best to be fair despite that. Personally I think it’s a little much on the fighting especially for a pilot and it definitely seemed a little bit rushed. But, the animation is fun, I love the way each character is distinctive in costume and personality.
Keep in mind I prefer watching things with writing/pacing like Arrow, The Flash, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, and the new Titans TV show and all of my ratings are going to be skewed based on a preference for stronger and darker material.
With that in mind, I did enjoy the episode and I do want to continue watching. I think if I had watched this as a 10-11 year old, it would’ve been amazing.]
#theo watches Teen Titans#teen titans#dc comics#dc universe#dc multiverse#I rly bought a dc universe subscription for this#it's like 8 bucks and I read comics too so it's worth it#if you have hbo ur set tho#raven dc#starfire#robin#dick grayson#og wonderboy#beast boy#cyborg#I know enough to have ships already#tbh robin/starfire is cute as hell#and is supported with comic evidence#*cough Red Hood and the Outlaws cough*#*kori gets her powers zapped and says Dick's real name while she's knocked out*#raven and beast boy are kinda cute too
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"Not My Yacht" *Chapter 2*
Yes, for two days this is a semi short chapter, but I had another long today and have one more tomorrow and I wanted you to have SOMETHING. Weirdly though I had an entire different chapter written in my head, but when I started typing this came out instead. My original idea is still coming, this just added a fun little bonus getting there. I promise, tomorrow you will get a longer chapter.
Thank you loves for sticking by me through everything! I love you all.
Also, I'm finally using CHAPTER. I kept wanting to use it instead of PART but I just kept writing PART and was like WELP. But they're chapters, right?!
Ok I'll shut up.
Part 1 Here
Part 3
Tag List
@madamsnape921
@lolliepopsicle
@chasingeverybreakingwave
@milkshqke
@wanniiieeee
@word-scribbless
@gibbs274
@sassyada
@aprildecker-blog
@bookishfanfic
@stars-in-the-skies-world
@stars-trash-18
@omgsuperstarg
@objection-argumentative
And @storiesofsvu for Rita check. lol.
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When five o’clock rolled around, Rita came walking out of her office with a stack of papers and her briefcase, balancing her purse on her barely free arm.
“Y/N, Why are you still here? Did I not unlock your chains?” She laughed.
“Haha….no, ma’am” You nervously laughed. “I um, I think I’m waiting for someone,”
“You think?” She raised a curious eyebrow. “If you’re waiting on Barba, you’re going to waiting a long time, sweetie,”
“Wha-? How--? Why, exactly?” You asked her totally flabbergasted by the insinuation that not only had Rafael asked you out, but was bailing already.
“He tends to get a little...involved, in his cases. Poor man is a workaholic,” She feigned pity for him.
“Right,” You nodded to her comically overflowing briefcase and papers. “Something you know nothing about,”
“Touché,” She winked. “I’d give him a call, make sure he hasn’t forgotten about you, dear. Before the cleaning staff shows up,” She laughed and sauntered out of her office, leaving you alone in the dark.
You glanced down at your phone. He hadn’t really specified a time, just-- “Tonight”. What did that even mean? Tonight. Like early evening dinner, or a midnight snack after he was done with his cases? You should probably text him. Or call him. Or text him.
TO BARBA: Heyyy….
Wait. Was three y’s too many? Wasn’t that a rule? You show affection by how many y’s you use? Is that a thing kids do these days? Wait, no you’re not a kid. And he certainly was NOT a kid. No. Be a grown up about this.
TO BARBA: Hi I’m just...checking in.
Checking in? What did that even mean? And why the ellipsis? There doesn’t need to be a pause in a text. That’s why it’s a text. You pause in your mind before typing. Idiot.
TO BARBA: What’s up?
Ok. Short and simple. To the point. No pressure, no demanding. Just... ‘checking in’. You hated yourself. Alright fine, good enough send it. SEND IT. HIT SEND NOW.
MESSAGE SENT.
Your phone shook in your trembling hand as you waited for the ellipsis of him writing back. That was too much, no no just put it back in your pocket and he’ll text you when he--
BARBA CALLING
Oh god, a phone call? Who calls people anymore? Grown ups, that’s who. Answer the phone like an adult.
“H-Hello?” You answered it as if he had the wrong number.
“Hey, Cinderella,” His smooth voice came through your earpiece. “I’m so sorry, I should have been more specific about the time,”
“Oh, yeah no-- no big deal, I’m just here at work….alone, in the dark…” You muttered the last words to yourself as you looked around the dark office.
“Right. Well, I’m kind of wrapped up in this case right now--” He started, making your heart drop. Well, Rita called it. He’s just married to his job, no time for women, let alone you. Time to just--
“....Would you hate me if I asked you to come help me?”
“...I’m sorry, what?” You blinked in confusion at your phone. So, was he actually asking you out or trying to snake you as an assistant from Rita? Is that what he meant by ‘dinner’? “Hey come bring me food and help me file these cases, because I’m so sexy and cocky and--”
“You know what, I’m so sorry I just heard how that sounded. You’ve been doing this all day, the last thing you wanna do is come--”
“Sure!” You cut him off a little loudly. What were you doing?! You’re just going to lay down and let him use your services for free? Well, when you put it that way it sounded pretty skeezy about yourself.
“....Are you sure? Because we can just have dinner another night--”
“....Yeah I have a feeling that will never happen,” You cut him off with a laugh.
“Wha--no, it will! I just--”
“Your wife comes first, I get it,” You cut him off again.
“My wife?”
“Yeah you’re married to your work,” You smirked into the phone.
“Wow, quippy Cinderella. Guess you’re more confident on the phone without my gorgeous face tripping you up now, aren’t you?”
“Do you want my help or not, Casanova?” He was totally right; without those green emeralds staring into your soul you were actually a pretty funny and smart person. Maybe it would be better to just have this date on the phone.
"Yes, absolutely," He sighed with a smile.
“Did you want me to bring food, or am I just supposed to eat paperclips and vending machine leftovers??”
“I’ll order some pizza, do you like pizza?”
“....I live in New York Barba. Obviously I like pizza,” You teased.
“Right,” He chuckled. “Well I’ll be here--”
“I know where your office is,” You cut him off for the third time.
“Oh, do you?” He asked in a sneaky tone, as if he thought you’d been googling him or something.
“Um, yeah,” Your voice fell an octave softer. “Actually I’ve been there several times, dropping off stuff from Rita for you,” Of course he wouldn’t remember that. Why would he remember that? You weren’t anything special.
“Shit,” He muttered as if chastising himself. “Y/N I’m so sorry, I--”
“It’s fine,” You assured him as you headed down to the subway. “I’m uh, I’m getting on the train so I’ll see you soon,” You hung before he could reply.
--------------
It wasn’t that far to Rafael’s office from Rita’s, just a few stops away. You quickly hurried up the stairs back into the Manhattan air as you swiftly walked through the sea of people leaving corporate America to go home to Suburbia. Finally you reached the building, went for the door and-- it was locked.
Well of course it was locked, nobody else in their right mind would be here this late-- so clearly you and Rafael were out of your minds. Shit. Should you call him? Was there a buzzer? Before you could think of another solution a pizza delivery man was walking up to you. Maybe ‘man’ was too generous, he was probably around 16 or 17.
“Delivery for Mr. Barba,” He handed you the pizza. Did you look like a “Mr. Barba” to him?!
“I um,” You stammered as the hot pizza burned the sides of your arms you were holding it on. “I’m not Mr. Barba,”
“Are you taking it to him?” He asked you with a slight attitude.
“I um,” You thought a moment. Well you were going to see him, so yes theoretically you would be taking the pizza with you to him. “...Yes,”
“That’ll be 46.57.” He whipped out a credit card scanner on his phone.
“E-Excuse me?” You were taken aback. Now Barba had you buying him dinner? And what kind of pizza costs basically 50 bucks?!
“2 Large pizzas, an order of cheesy bread, a dessert pizza and delivery fee,” The kid read off the receipt from his phone. “I only accept credit or debit cards, and please tip generously,”
“Yeah right,” You muttered with a roll of your eyes as you pulled out your credit card and swiped it across his phone. The light turned green and a receipt printed off an attachment to his phone. He ripped it off and handed it to you, then nonchalantly walked back down the stairs to wherever he was parked.
“Awesome,” You sighed. You still didn’t know how to get inside, and now you were carrying all this hot food. All of this for a pair of green eyes?!
To make matters worse, your phone started going off in your purse. You groaned and tried to put all of the boxes down softly, but the night wind blew them onto the pavement, HARD.
“Shit!” You groaned louder as you tried to salvage the food while pulling your phone from your purse. Of COURSE.
BARBA CALLING
“I can’t get in,” You simply stated as a greeting on the phone.
“What?”
“I can’t get in the building, Barba,” You grumbled, now on a 8 on the annoyance scale.
“Oh! Oh God,” The line went dead. Awesome.
After a few minutes while you were trying to rebalance all of the boxes in your arms, one of the big glass doors swung open right into you. The boxes all pressed against you, their hot, saucy, cheesy and chocolatey goodness smearing all over your work outfit.
“SHIT!!!!!!” You screamed in horror.
“Oh my god, Oh god Y/N I am SO--” Rafael started to apologize profusely, but you noticed he was trying his best not to burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry, do you think this is funny?!” You asked angrily while you peeled a pepperoni from your hair.
“No, not at all,” He shook his head vigorously, but kept giggling behind his eyes.
“You do!” You stomped your heel, causing marinara to roll down your legs. ���You are absolutely laughing at me being covered in all of your stupid food that I had to pay for by the way--”
“Oh no, really?” He suddenly turned sincere.
“No, Rafael,” You scoffed as you tried pulling cheese from your skirt. “I just had sex with him in the parking lot and we called it square,”
“Really--?!”
“NO NOT REALLY!”
“Okay! Okay I’m sorry, really I am,” Rafael tried to show you sympathy, but you looked so damn cute covered in a tasty meal.
“Yeah I can see that, you’re grinning like a five year old,” You rolled your eyes.
“I’m sorry, Y/N I really am,” He gave up trying to hide a laugh. “But you have to admit it’s pretty funny--”
“I DON’T THINK--” You started to scream at him again, but his smile made these cute little crinkles in his eyes, and his laugh was like an angel’s chorus. You might have been covered in food, but you would be covered in manure if it made him laugh like that.
“For what it’s worth, you look delicious,” He teased you, pulling an actual full piece of pizza from your chest and biting it.
“Oh my god, you’re so gross,” You did your best not to laugh, you were still supposed to be angry.
“Yum, Y/N flavor, my favorite,” He laughed for a moment just as you both realized what he had said. “Uh, I mean--” He looked away in embarrassment, and you swear you saw his face flush red.
“Um no counselor,” You bit your lip with a smile. “I’m pretty sure I taste better than a mix of pizza sauce and chocolate,”
“I’m sure you do,” Rafael bravely retorted, now that he knew you were in the playing mood.
“....But seriously, now I have to go home and get this shit off--”
“I have a shower in my office,” He blurted out.
“....Excuse me?” You blinked, not believing you heard him right.
“I...I have a shower in my office,”
“Oh my god, Rafael Barba are you that addicted to work that you live here?”
“No!” He rolled his eyes. “It’s for emergencies,”
“Emergencies? Like what?”
“Like a beautiful woman covered in pizza toppings and chocolate,” He smirked. “Now come on, I don’t want anyone around here thinking I’m dating a crazy person,” He opened the glass doors again and escorted you into the lobby of the building.
Your mind didn’t know what to focus on first; the fact that he had this mysterious office shower, that he had offered for you to use said shower, or the fact that he just referred to you as a ‘woman he was dating’. You just followed him silently into his office with a smitten grin on your face.
He wasn’t lying when he was in the ‘middle’ of something. Papers were strewn all about his desk, a white board with bullet points for arguments and cross examinations scribbled on it. You finally got a good look at him without the anger of having food all over your judgement. He looked tired, not the usual smooth and pristine Rafael Barba you were used to. But when he looked back at you to show you where his shower was, his green eyes sparkled gazing into yours.
“So, I have some spare suits in a closet here, would you mind hanging out in one of my dress shirts while I wash...these?” He gestured to your dirty clothes. Wait, wash?
You suddenly realized he had led you into a secret room to the side of his office, behind a bookcase.
“Wha…” You looked around the room. There was a shower, a wardrobe, a washer/dryer combo, and a suit steamer. “Jesus Barba, are you sure you don’t live here?”
“No I promise I don’t,” He shook his head with a laugh. “...But I may have on occasion fallen asleep here enough to invest in this,”
“And what happens when this office is passed on to a new ADA?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Then I’m sealing this place off like a mausoleum,” He stated very seriously, causing you to giggle. He loved your giggle, it was so small and soft, just like you.
“Anyway,” He shook off his momentary daze at your giggle hoping you didn’t notice. “Like I said-- Shower, dress shirt. Just put your dirty clothes in the washer and we’ll pop them in the dryer later,”
“Right,” You nodded, definitely having noticed his dreamy stare at your giggle. How had you gone from completely under his radar to making him giddy like a school boy in two days?
“Right,” He nodded back. “I’ll just be out here...ordering another pizza,” He smirked. “By the way, I’ll totally reimburse you for the one you’re wearing,” He stuck his tongue out at you with a huge grin.
“Oh you better,” You gave him the same face back. “Or I’ll cover you in it,” You lightly pressed a marinara sauce covered finger into his perfectly white dress shirt. He glanced down at it in horror.
“Oh that was so--” He started to tickle and attack you, but realized that would only make his outfit dirtier. “This isn’t over,” He wagged a finger at you as he pointed you to the shower. You gave him one last cheeky smile as he walked out and shut the door to his secret room.
What was happening? Why were you getting to him so easily, so fast? How could he have not even remembered that he had ‘met’ you several times? Well, one thing was for sure. He was never going to forget this night.
#rafael barba#rafael barba imagine#rafael barba fanfiction#rafael barba x you#rafael barba x reader#law and order svu#law and order svu fanfiction#not my yacht
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Static Shock: Shock to the System and Aftershock Review
“You know what? 13 years ago, me and some friends sat in a restaurant all night and daydreamed about the kinds of stories we would tell if we had the chance. We wanted to expand the concept of superhero to include characters that kind of looked like us, who had some of the same background, experiences and dreams as we did. We wanted to create something fun that a new generation would respond to the same way we responded to our childhood heroes -and damn if we didn't succeed beyond my wildest dreams. Today, Static Shock is a household name with millions of fans of all ages (Is there stuff I'd do differently? Yeah, almost all of season four but why nitpick?) Static is the most successful thing I've ever helped create and I'm both proud and gratified that people have taken it into their hearts. “
Dwayne McDuffie, Co-Creator of Static and Writer for Static Shock
This review is dedicated to Dwayne McDuffie and Robert L. Washington III. Rest In Power Static Shock is awesome. I grew up with the show watching it both first run on the WB and second run on Cartoon Network and loved it as much as I did other large parts of my childhood courtsey of DC like Batman the Animated Series, Teen Titans and both Justice League Shows. What makes this unique among the DC Properties is that Static wasn’t really a big name when he got a show. He wasn’t even part of the DC Universe.
See as I had no idea for probably a good decade, Static actually came from Milestone Comics, a company ran by and focused on african americans. The goal was understandable: While black heroes existed at the time, and there were some fantastic ones like Storm, Jim Rhodes and Steel... these guys weren’t the center of their universes. The big faces of the big companies, Spider-Man, Wolverine, Hulk, Iron Man, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, The Flash.. were white. So milestone was a shakeup of that with the main teams and heroes all being black, from Icon, an alien who’d lived among man but rather than end up in kansas like say superman ended up imprinting on a slave woman centuries ago and has been with us since, who was encouraged by an energetic teenager named Rocket to put on a costume and do something with his powers and his community, Hardware, a tech genius who had his work stolen by a white asshole and wanted to fight back and BLood Syndicate, a group of gang members all caught in the “The Big Bang”, a huge fight between all of Dakota, the midwest city where the comics take place, that ended when the police released a bunch of experimental gas that gave them all super powers.
As most of you who have watched the show already know, this is where Static comes from. Static was the company making their own Spider-Man, i.e. a nerdy teenager who suddenly gets super powers, in this case Virgil Hawkins who at the prodding of a friend took a gun to The Big Bang to get revenge on a bully. .but ultimately couldn’t go through with it, decided it wasn’t him and got rid of the gun and ran.. and still ended up in it, becoming Static, a young hero dedicated to using his powers to fight other “Bang Babies”.. a term that dosen’t really sound that great and they really should’ve thought through. But Phrasing aside the character was great and I look forward to reading more and only haven’t because I have to buy the issues gradually, but DC is currently re-releasing the individual issues of Static, Icon, and Hardware weekly in anticipation of a reboot of Milestone Coming in May digitally on Comixology at only 2 bucks a pop, and rereleased the original print collections that were long out of print for 10 bucks each, though i’m getting static on it’s own since i’ts really not that much less expensive as it only collects four issues while Icon and Hardware both collect 8, so I can wait a bit there on Hardware and already own Icon: A Hero’s Welcome.. and really need to review it at some point.
While Milestone’s output was good, at least from the two books i’ve read, with Robert Washinton III, who sadly not only ahs also passed but was fucking homeless for a while in the 2000′s.. what the actual hell, writing Static alongside Dwayne McDuffie, whose later moved onto animation writing tons of Static episodes all of them classics including the school shooting episode, the first three rubberbandman episodes and both Anasazi episodes. Point is it had good writers and artists and even had a distrbution deal with DC, so they had a leg up on the glut of other comic book companies.. but happened to start at the start of the comic book crash, a huge downturn in sales in the 90′s as the speculator boom, i.e. a bunch of people assuming every number one would be worth golden and silver age money, forgetting a character has to BUILD INTREST and this stuff takes time, and whose attempts to sell fast flooded the market with comics no one wanted,, caused the roof to cave in and with a bunch of assholes pegging milestone as a “Company for black people” rather than you know, a company trying to add fucking diversity and represntation to the comics industry, and that simply wanted a unvierse that was centered around people of color instead of white guys. The company eventually had to shut down, and was left to lisencing. This is where the show comes in. Producers HAD been trying to make shows based on Milestone for a while, as far back as the mid-90s and the company was was all for it but the closest it got was an x-men style team series using various characters whose first draft was terrible and whose second draft by Alan Burnett, a producer on various DC Animated shows who’d go on to produce Static Shock, that McDuffie and others really liked but sadly did not get picked up. eventually though with presistance Static ended up getting a series and as I said McDuffie went on to write for it though he did not develop it. Some changes went into place naturally to make it work for an early 2000′s kids show and while i’ll probably miss so since again, only read one issue as we go. But due to Milestone coming back my intrest was peaking, hence finally reading the copy of Icon I had to buy from the library years ago due to keeping it overdue but am now EXTREMLEY glad I own as i’ts incredibly rare and really damn good, and wanting to read static, doing so lately since it’s finally on digtiial and again not too expensive. So join me as I give you a shock to the system and revisit this hell of a series to see if it holds up.. which just to cut that short it does and i’m only holding off binging MORE because I want the first two eps to be fresh enough in my head to review properly.. and also go over the various voice actors because that’s a thing with me now and charcter co-creator dwayne mcduffie because he’s awesome.
As I like to do when covering a series first episodes, let’s run down the voice cast.
First up is an UTTER LEGEND, and I use the term voice acting legend a lot, and mean it every time and have good reason to use it when I say it, and Phil LaMarr is a GOD in the buisness, having done a metric ton of voice acting roles, and being easily the most proflific black voice actor in animation. He’s also done some acting work, mostly in pulp fiction which I have not seen, but his true staying power and talent is in animation so here’s just the roles I feel are most notable or may not be very notable but i’m bringing up anyway because it’s my list.
His roles besides Virgil include Lester Payton the Texas Ranger who showed up for one very good episode of king of the hill to be badass and show up the hickish, stupid and very punchable local Sheriff, Gearld’s obnoxious older brother Jamie O on Hey Arnold, Hermes Conrad from futurama, Carver from the Weekenders (PUT IT ON PLUS DISNEY), Axel Foley for exactly one bit in Clerks the Animated Series, but anyone whose seen it will know exactly which one, Micheal on the Proud Family, Black Vulcan on Harvey Birdman (In His Pants), Hector Con Carne and Dracula on Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy and Evil Con Carne, Jack on Samurai Jack something I didn’t know for decades (and I didn’t know about the carver thing till today though i’ts obvious in hindsight), John Motherfucking Stewart on Justice League and later Steel and Adult Static in the Unlimited seasons, Osmosis Jones on Ozzy and Drix, Bolbi Strogofski on Jimmy Neutron (And yes i’m just as shocked as you are.), Wilt on Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, Marcus on Life and Times of Juniper Lee, Bull Sharkowski on My Gym Partner is A Monkey and Also a Sociopath Please Help God My Life is a waking nightmare..... okay the rest of that title is implied but we all watched the same show, we all know in our hearts that was the title
Moving on, he was also, and yes there’s MORE: Maxie Zeus on The Batman, Philly Phil on Class of 3000, Both Robertsons AND Fancy Dan on the Spectacular Spider-Man, Jazz on Transformers Animated, Kit Fisto and Bail Organa on Star Wars the Clone Wars, Gambit and Bolivar Trask on Wolverine and the X-Men, Aquaman I, L-Ron and Green Beetle on Young Justice, J.A.R.V.I.S. and Wonder Man (Simon Williams) In Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, Gabe and Carny on Kaijudo: Rise of the Duel Masters (Really miss that game and have been snapping up what cards I can get lately), Baxter Stockman in the 2012 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (And there’s also an awesome photo of him with 2003 Baxter... the two best together in one place. I got chills), Dormammu (I’ve come to bargin) in various Marvel Shows, Noville in Mighty Magiswords, Zach’s dad Marcus in Milo Muprhy’s Law, Craig’s Douchey Brother Benard on Craig of the Creek, showing he’s clearly come full circle, And Mr. Scully on the Casagrndes. And given It took about two paragraphs to cover all of this, yeah, I MEANT legend.
Next we have Kevin Micheal Richardson as Virgil’s Dad Robert, and it’s the first time since I started introducing Voice Actors on a show that i’ve overlapped. I already covered him during the second episode of legend of the three caballeros, but for the short version he’s also very acomplished, very damn good and I somehow missed he played the old blind guy in hey arnold> Needless to say the dude is awesome.
Virgil’s Sister Sharon is played by Michele Morgan who was in the rap group BWP and did some smaller roles outside of this the one exception being Juicy on the PJ’s, which I have not watched much of but REALLY do not like, though i’ll at least give it credit for being a decently long lasted black claymation sitcom at at time when there were, and hoenstly still aren’t, many black animated shows.
Back to long casting sheets, next up is Jason Marsden, who is one of my faviorites as i’ve realized recently as Ritchie. As I also found out only recently he started on the Sitcom Step By Step and while that show is .. ehhhhhhhhh, he is great in it because he’s great in everything. He also apparently has his own internet variety show which I have to watch now. His roles include Max Goof, ironically given I was just talking about that role a few days ago, Haku in the english dub of Spirted Away, Micheal, the kid being yelled at by a bunch of 80′s cartoons characters not to take drugs in Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue!, Nermal in the DTV Garfield movies and The Garfield Show, Tino on the Weekenders (SERIOUSLY DISNEY), Snapper Carr on Justice League, Rikochet on Mucha Lucha! for the last season (Why I do not knkow and while I love the guy he was not the right choice), Felix on Kim Possible, Chase Young on Xiaolin Showdown (WHich I did not realize was him and now I do easily his best role and I REALLY should’ve), Red Star and Billy Numerous on Teen Titans, Speedy on Batman Brave and the Bold, Impulse/Kid Flash II on Young Justice, and Fingers on Kaijudo. He hasn’t done as much lately which is a shame but hopefully i’tll pick up again.
Next up is Hotstreak, Virgil’s brutal bully turned unhinted pyromancer played by DANIEL COOKSY, another actor i’m happy to talk about and another faviorite I haven’t seen much of lately. Daniel was an actor from childhood, playing Budnick on Salute Your Shorts, but he quickly gained a long and storied catalogue of VA Work: His first big roll was as Montana Max on Tiny Toon Adventures and if there is a god he’ll be back for the reboot, Stoop Kid on Hey Arnold, the incomprable Jack Spicer on Xiaolin Showdown, far and away his best role and part of why Chronicles sucked so bad was he was he didn’t get to reprise the role, The titular Dave the Barbarian, Django of the Dead on El Tigre (Had no idea), Kicks utterly insufferable big Brother Brad on Kick Buttowski and apparently he’s back at it again after laying low for a bit as he’s voicing Snag in Long Gone Gultch.. which I already really needed to watch but hot damn, I missed him. Sign me up.
Frieda, Virgil’s crush and close friend who in the comics was his main confidante and love intrest but here is eventually pushed aside, is voiced by Danica Mckeller whose work didn’t seem all that familiar.. until I found out she was Ms. Martian on Young Justice. Hello, Megan. Very talented and she did get a major role in a dc show eventually so good for her. Can’t wait for season 4.
So with our major players out of the way, let’s talk about Dwayne. McDuffie is an AWESOME man and my respect has grown for him more and more with time. A writer and editor at Marvel, McDuffie has a decent resume doing smaller but awesome books, which I got most of for free last year when Marvel was giving out free digital collections due to the lock down, like Damage Control, a sitcom set in the marvel universe about the company that picks up after superhero battles and the logistics and antics that insue and Dethlok, about a pacfist trapped inside a cyborg zombie. He was as mentioned one of Milestone’s founders, and wrote Icon, Hardware and co-wrote the first few issues of Static. He’d go on to a pretty stacked career in animation, writing on this show and Justice League before becoming story editor and show runner for Unlimited , even making a return to comics as a result writing the Marvel miniseries beyond and an arc of Fantastic Four in which Black Panther and Storm filled in for Reed and Sue while the two of them worked on their marriage after Reed did.. pretty much everything he did in Civil War. He also became head writer and show runner for Ben 10: Alien Force and Ultimate Alien, revamping the franchise a bit, and Alien Force, at least the first two seasons are awesome and I feel people overreacted on the changes. Ultimate Alien is okay, but has it’s problems but the finale was awesome and left the man’s legacy on a high note.. as he sadly passed in 2011 due to heart complications. He is truly missed and produced some utterly amazing stuff whlie he was alive. So on that melacholy note let’s see what happens when his creation hits the tv screen shall we?
Shock to the System:
This episode is written by Christopher Simmons, who is apparently a huge art designer guy.. but i’m not sure that’s the same chirsptoher simmons. Much more notable is the writer of the episode after this Stan Berkowitz, who was showrunner for season 1 and has done a LOT of DCAU work and is suprising talent, having written a lot of awesome Justice League episodes including Secret Society and The Royal Flush One. Point is we’re in first class hands. Before the episode itself I want to talk about the intro and how it’s unique among DCAU shows. Like most Western Animation the intros for DCAU shows didn’t change much over the seasons with the most I can see is JLU changing up the footage to preview the current episode and later adding Hawkgirl to the intro after her return to the team. I THINK superman the animated series changed some of it’s footage too, but I can’t confrim it and may of just been imagining it. As i’ve talked about on my blog it’s normally a pet peeve of mine, mostly because shows you know, change after season 1, characters get added some one shot characters used for the intro never return, and after a while it can feel dated especially in more recent shows where the status quo is not at all set in stone and things change quite a bit. But sometimes it can be good enough that either the dated elements don’t matter or general enough that you don’t need to change it and i’ts just that good.. and given Batman the Animated Series has both in spades, you can see why i’ts probably my golden standard for intros and after superman the animated series DC mostly followed suit. But being part of the teen superhero boom of the 2000′s Static is unique in that it splits the diffrence: It’s intro gets the character across perfectly like a good intro should starting with Virgil getting out of bed and running a comb across his head before showing off to his sister to bug her and literally running into his dad who hand shim his bag and smiles, silently showing off his family. He then runs to school and runs into some trouble.. and said trouble changes for each intro, with Rubberband Man for season 1, Kanga (Whose name I only know because I happened to run across it) for season 2 and your guess is as good as mine for seasons 3 and 4, though Hotstreak is a constant. They still save some money for seasons 1 and 2 by recycling some animation.. but that’s alright with mea s it was good animation, and the improtant thing is cycling out old villians for new ones, while Season 3 is the only out and out redo to show off Richie taking on the Gear identity, adding about 10 seconds of intro to let him show off. Seriously it’s an utterly great intro and like the other DCAU intros outside of superman, stuck in my brain.
The other change that’s ENTIRELY diffrent from the rest of htem is that the music changes each time. The first two have the same formula just with a difrent vocalist and backing track: a superhero theme but with some hip hop beat boxing over it. The first intro is fine enough, not specattcular but stilll god. The second song.. is eh. Not really great and feels like a marked downgrade from season 1 and just dosen’t blend an ocrehstiral superhero theme with the beatbox elements NEARLY as well. The third song though is my faviorite.. even if I HATED Little Romeo as a kid because I really did not like his nick show, it’s more a straight up rap song, but it has a faster beat that fits the intro better, and Romeo’s bragging fits Virgil’s character and penchant for Spidey quips perfectly. I also find it ironic that the theme that blends in with the dcau the most, the first season’s, is the one from BEFORE they decided to put it in the same universe. Still this season’s intro slaps, I just like the LIttle Romeo one a bit more. The opening scene is picture perfect. Some masked crooks looting a warehouse are loading some stolen TV’s into a van when suddenly the lights come on one by one above one of the crooks before his tv switches to various channels before going haywire. Cue our heroes’ entrance. Let’s tak ea good look at him
Static’s Costume is awesome. While I prefer the season 3 redesign, and clearly DC agrees as the redeisgn was used for both pre and post new-52 when they used him, and while he’s getting a fresh design for the reboot, said design takes a lot of cures from said outfit. As for how the outfit differs from the comics itself this is the design he had in the comics
It didn’t change much from the first issue, with the exception of his now iconic big puffy jacket which was added pretty early into the character’s history but I was unaware of that and just assumed he had the bodysuit the whole time. The more you know. But as you can see outside of the cool puffy jacket over a costume the two couldn’t be more diffrent. While the Dakotaverse outfit is more a standard superhero outfit, with some regular clothes touches on top the first cartoon outfit comes off more realistic, looking fantastic, but still coming off as something two teenagers could realistically have thrown together with what clothes they could buy, while still looking awesomely superheroy. IN short it’s perfect and only topped by the season 3 onward look...
But the slicker look, with an even cooler jakcet and the new colors all fitting the lighting ascetic better, but fits: not only has Virgil come along farther since he started, but with Richie now having a genius brain as Gear, he can provide a far slicker, far more professional superhero outfit on the budget the two have. This show is just great at costume design.
So getting back to the episode at hand, Static puts up a huge sign in elecrticy saying “Bad guys here”, PFFFT, and then hides away and narrates that a few days ago he’d be the last person anyone would’ve expected to be a hero. Cue Flashback.
We meet Virgil Hawkins on an average day: rapping into his razor, getting into a petty argument with his older sister Sharon, as a younger brother myself I relate to this, and talking to his dad who tries to get them to cut that out. We find out his mom has passed via his sister making really terrible eggs and saying that’s how mom made them. Exposition! Though we do get a great bit through this as when his sister gets distracted by her boyfriend calling, he uses the opportunity of her leaving the room to dump the eggs.. after having earlier jokingly prayed to his mom for a way out of breakfast. “Thanks for looking out for me mom” That’s both very sweet and very hilarious.
This is a change from the comics it turns out as I was utterly flored to find Virgil’s mom alive and well when reading the first issue of Static. Turns out this was a change made during development and one Dwane McDuffie admitted in the interview I got the tribute quote from to not liking as he had a good reason for having Virgil have a nuclear family, as most black families in media at the time were just one single parent and a kid or two with the other having either left or died. He wasn’t too bothered by it as while he preferred what he came up with in the first place, the show DID get some really good stories out of her being gone and didn’t just have her be absent because shut up. Virgil is still working over her death and the way HOW she died ends up playing an important role in this episode and gives Virgil a dislike of guns, as she died to gang violence. So the change wasn’t for stupid or racist reasons, but likely both to keep the character count down while giving them something to work with for storylines. Or it could’ve been for stupid reasons and the writers simpily made lemonade out of that very dumb lemon, either way it ended up working. Virgil also plans to ask his friend Frieda out. Frieda was a bigger deal in the comics, being Virgil’s friend and confidante as well as his ocasional love intrest, but here while she was inteded to at least be his love intrest here, that sorta fizzled out. As for the best friend role we meet her replacement in Richie, which McDuffie conceded was the kind of change a studio would make swapping out a female character for a male one. That being said the crew made the best of it and Richie is awesome, a bit of an overcompensating dipstick at times, but a good sounding board and pal for virgil and funny as hell too. He was also gay, something only revealed post series by McDuffie.. but unlike say Dumbledore, it’s a bit easier to swallow here: The early 2000′s were an even worse time for gay characters in tv let alone cartoons, and if they couldn’t kiss or have sex scenes on regular tv, there was no way we were getting any representation in a children’s show. So it was largely just hinted at by Richie overcompensating in how “into girls” he was and i’m once again fine with this being word of god as it was literally the best they could do and his counterpart in the comics was also gay, if not as relevant. Ritch encourages Virgil to work on his opening to ask her out as it’s awkward as heck, hits a bit close to home.. but I do appricate the show just .. having him try and ask her out from the first episode. They likely would’ve drug thigns out a bit granted had they used Frieda more, i’m not blind to the convetions of the time. .but as someone who got the very wrong idea from tv that just waiting around meant a girl would like you eventually, when no you need to actually try even if rejection happens, I honestly wish we had more of this in media than the other garbage morals at the time.
So he prepares to , not helped by her mentioning guy after guy is asking her out.... but before he can F-Stop, the future hotstreak, shows up. F-STOP
That being said...... it’s not as bad as the original gangster name for the comic’s version, Biz Money B. Yes BIZ MONEY B
So yeah while F-Stop is no more intimidating, it at least means I can stop laughing. Francis, because I can’t type F-Stop without laughing and this review is already behind, shoves Virgil out of the way and agressively hits on Frieda, even saying “you smell good”, the international sign your a douchebag and also to call the police. Virgil steps up to the guy and gets PAINFULLY slammed into the lockers, something I give the animation team a lot of credit for, as you can FEEL how fucking painful that was. Virgil is saved by Wade, another local gangbanger who in the comics was a close friend of Virgils but here saves him seemingly just because.. seemingly.
On the way home though Virg’s problems don’t end as naturally, the giant sized asshole with nothing better to do has his goons corner virgil before VIOLENTLY beating him.. off screen but the noises, and the clear brusies including a black eye, on virgil afterwords.. just holy damn i’m suprsied they got away with this but it shows just how horrifing it was and that this is a step above regular bullying, which make no mistake is absoluttley terrible and the series would later do an episode on it and school shootings, into straight up gang violence. Wade shows up again and gets the bastards to flee.. but also makes it clear he can’t keep doing this.. and forces Virgil to meet him at his base under the bridge. And it’s a tense sequence, with Virgil KNOWING this is a bad idea but having no real choice and Wade making it abundantly clear that he wants Virgil to join his crew, and makes a chilling point: while Virgils dad RIGHTFULLY dosen’t want his son to join a gang as Virgil points out.. he can’t be there for him all the time and eventually one of those times, Francis will be around. And he may not surivive that. Virgil nods noncomittaly. At home it gets even more grim as he dosen’t open up to his family, understandably as his dad would jsut say to call the police and well.. we’ve seen how the police treat black people. At best they’d just try and use Virgil as an informant and that likely wouldn’t end fucking well for Virgil. Ritchie points out he can’t join a gang, virgil’s mom died that way.. see told you it’d be important to the plot.. but I like how the story dosen’t offer an easy answer.. well okay he gets electric powers soon enough but without the fantastic element this is just an innocent kid caught between either joining the very thing his mom hated or hoping a system not built to protect him will keep him alive. It’s utterly saddening and chilling and holy shit is it amazing a cartoon in the early 2000′s was able to get away with.. ANY OF THIS, and they handle it great, paired down a bit from the comics but even then it’s still incredibly balsy they got THIS much in.
Naturally Wade calls in his favor and our hero is forced to come running.. and soon finds out Wade’s brought him in for a massive gang war. Welcome to the big bang, baby. He hands Virgil a gun as things get started and Virgil.. drops the thing and tries to escape, in a harrowing sequence.. and runs into Francis because god apparently REALLY hates this kid today. As if to prove that the police show up and while that prevents a beating, they demand they disassemble. then release untested gas on them because of course they do.
As a result the big bang truly begins, with the various gang members getting mutated.. and naturally so does virgil. Though he wakes up the next day seemingly fine. How’d he get home? Does his dad know where he was?
I don’t know and we’re not getting any answers, but Virgil soon finds weird stuff happening like his clock shorting out, change being attracted to him and his razor going wild. It’s only once he get sback to his room he gets an inkling of what’s going on and calls Ritchie to meet him at the Junk yard.. though it is a bit of a dick move as he dosen’t you know, tell him anything about Wade or Francis right away. He does at the yard though.. and that he has powers, having finally figured out how to use them to a point. And the series does provide a decent justification later as to why he’d get this so quickly: Virgil is a smart kid, gets great grades at school and apparnetly there’s even an episode later where he gets a scholarship to a fancy genius school. So him getting how elctromagntisim works or being a quick study on it makes perfect sense.
Richie suggest the obvious.. to become a superhero. And the thought.. hadn’t occured to Virgil. It’s honestly a nice twist on the old trope. That he hadn’t thought of it, not because he’s selfish or any of that or needs to learn a hard lesson, those have been done.. simply because the rush of getting his powers, and implicitly of having a way out of his current predciament, a way to keep Francis off his back and keep Wade from pulling him in further. His own path. But once i’ts brought up.. he jumps on it. Part of it is being a nerd like you or I, of course he wants to.. and being a good intetioned one, he knows this is the right thing to do. It’s waht makes a superhero a hero: Anyone can get powers in a universe like this, esepcailly the dcau, but it takes true courage and heart to use them selflessly and knowing you’ll be in danger. It’s why I love surperheroes: they often didn’t ask for this but they do it anyway because somebody’s gotta. We also get an intresting wrinkle is superman is, at least I think in this episode I could’ve missed it or misremembered things, mentioned as a fictional character. That’s because originally like the comics this wasn’t part of the DCAU.. but eventually the crew decided it shared staff from it, shared a network, both first run and on reruns, why not just make it part of the DCAU proper. I fully support this decisionf: While i’m midly annoyed unlimited never really used anything from static shock outside of Static himself in the time travel episode, despite you know Static and Gear having BEEN to the tower and not being much younger than Kara and defintely older than Courtney, I chalk it up to weird rights issues or something like that. But having Batman, Batman Beyond, Superman, Green Lantern and the Justice League itself all guest star was a good idea, and expanded both static’s universe and gave the DCAU something differnt as most heroes in it were older and more experinced in contrast to the up and coming virgil. Again really would’ve been nice if he and gear could’ve been a part of the expanded league but production might of just been too far ahead or, given he had his own series, they might just have wanted to stick to toher characters. Also begs the question why Icon or Hardware wasn’t adapted for the expanded League but hey, questions for later and the tricky logisitics of the milestone rights might’ve been the issue. I don’t know I wasn’t in the room.
So we get a costume montage, including Black Vulcan from Superfriends, who again ironically would be voiced by Lamarr not too long after this, though weirdly they DON’T use his outfit from the comics for this montage. I mean why not? It fits the gag and would’ve been a good second to last choice.But what could’ve been aside we get our winner and cut back to present day...
Thanks boys. Static finds out one of the things in the warehouse is a shipment of computers for the school and can’t help but show off, showing up to the school, where Frieda and Richie are setting up for the dance, and dropping off the computers, and even saying his catchphrase for the first time “I’ll put a shock to your system” (Which Richie chimes in with awesome line and I agree, great catcphrase), before helping set up and flirting with frieda.
Though as Richtie says he’s a natural. He’s not wrong as he can work a crowd. .but back it up too as his first run out had him easily taking out the crooks, and as many teen superheros and fans of heroes of hte type, myself included will tell you, getting it right in one is not easy. Not even Miles MOrales was immune. All Static needs now is a villian.
And the end of the episode provides one as we see, in horrifc and once again damn suprising detail most of hte new metas aren’t doing so good and are melting and other stuff and we catch up with Francis whose burning up.. and naturally given that hair, though given he named himself F-Stop it’s the least of his problems, he’s got fire powers and escapes to “Have me some fun”
So with that we end episode 1. And it’s excellent, a great way to introduce the hero and while the warehouse opening is a bit superflous, it is a decent addition, showing our heroes first outing in costume and giving us a bit of an action scene to get us through the very heavy rest of the episode. But the rest of the episode is no less grippping, telling the tale of a teen caught in an unwinnable scenario who suddenly finds a way out. And speaking of which waht of Wade? Will we see him again? Is he perhaps Ebon, the series big bad as I thought when I was a kid? What comes of the man who directly caused static’s origin?
Yeahhh that’s the one mistep I think the pilot makes. Frieda is understandable as that was likely a simple change in creative direction. This though? Why build this guy up if your not going to bring him back. I mean where he went was probably the grave, as he probably did due to his mutation, but it’s still VERY weird to spend a whole episode focusing on this guy, building him up as a big personal threat to our hero.. and NOT have him become the series big bad. And maybe he WAS supposed to be ebon and they just changed their mind. I don’t know but it bothers me it bothers me a lot. Otherwise though flawless. ONe more to go.
Aftershock: We open outside an electronics store, as our heroes watch the news reacap what happened in the first episode, with the media dubbing it the Big Bang and revealing their could be hundreds of “Metahumans”, as Virgil dubs after deciding the media’s term “Mutant” dosen’t fit, a nice wink to the fact that that’s the term used in dc comics and I believe milestone but could be wrong there. Me I like the term, has a nice ring to it.
At the store while Richie mulls over waht this means Static finds out he’s a human CD player.... this was before mp3 players and streaming on your phone made them horribly obsolete mind you and if you don’t know what one is congradualtions you live in some sort of bubble and you made me feel really old junior.
Frieda happens to be there and Virgil quips “What’s the matter they run out of britney cds”. Dude she’s not bad. Also be careful what you wish for man. Nickeback returned the year after this. You have not truly suffered through bad music yet my young friend. They spot a kid looking feverish, and he soon turns into a purple werewolf, as you do. It’s a bang baby.. those are richie’s exact word and you may not want to start a panic there bud. Just saying your best friend is one. THeir not all like this. Our heroes book it only to run into Francis who naturally refuses to let them leave and only doesn’t try to beat up Virgil because Virgil points otu the werewolf and nonplussed, he goes to fight it, scarring it off by revealing his own powers. He’s now dubbed himself Hotstreak which points for getting an actually good name kid. No points for what happens next as unsuprisingly getting powers did NOT mak ehim a better person and he attacks Virgil who blocks with a garbage can lid and thankfully is blasted into an ally. Richie tries to guard frieda for damn obvious reasons but gets hsi shirt burnt up because shut up Thankfully Static shows up, and we get our firsdt full on superhuman fight as both fight each other with aplomb, and it’s a damn good fight.. and one that goes pear shaped for Virg as he’s caught off guard when he finds out Hotstreak can use his powers to fly, and tackles him and his previous trauma causes him to freeze up. Thankfully , as Frieda put in a call earlier, the fire department arrive and HOt streak has to retreat, though Virgil is bummed that he “Choked”. And I love this as it not only shows Virgil’s inepxerince, as this is his first time fighting a bad guy but that just because he HAS power now dosen’t mean trauma and his previous fear of Hotstreak goes away or you won’t freeze up from time to time. It dosen’t make him weak or anything like some assholes would call it .. it makes him human. Humans make mistakes, and it makes him all the more relatable that he’s not pefect and that he did freeze up as I know I certainly would at last once in the circumstances.
Things don’t get better at dinner as Sharon and Pops argue over the bang babies with Pops calling them a meance and Sharon pointing out Static exists so they can’t all be bad. See assuming a group of superhumans are bad because a handful of them ar edick sis why the x-men had to get their own island nation. You can only save an ungreatful populous so many times before you say “fuck it i’m getting my own island, pay me for life saving drugs, save your damn selves and stop doing genocides on us. Kay thanks”. But he does bring up a valid point that rattles his son: We don’t know anything about the Bang Babies or their biological structures and it’s likely they might further mutate into monsters, Static included.
Virgil, understandably, wants to check this and thus he and richie compare blood samples in science, to no real conclusion. She he checks out with his doctor who assumes he’s sexually active in a great getting crap past the radar bit and a bit of realisim, but he agrees to the test though if something came up he would have to tell Virgil’s dsad and is up front about this. Nice dose of realisim.
That night City Council has a meeting and the Mayor TRIES to deflect Papa Hawkins questions about the bang babies which again, while being a judgmental ass as not every person hit was a gang member (Virgil, and as we discover later some others), and not every gang member is there by choice, some by circumstnace some, like virgil almost was, because they HAD no other option. Again years of reading x-men may of just made me a bit touchy on assholes admitely assuming superpower people bad. But it’s clear the public is upset and while she says an investigation is underway... Virgil and Richie are not only not convinced, but figure she’s actively covering it up. And unlike everyone else there who probably suspects the same, they can do something about it and tail her. It’s during this, and cleverly as I didn’t realie till writing this using similar skills to his human cd player act, Virgil listens in and discovers whose behind it: Edwin Alva, whose apparently richer than bill gates and a beloved phinarophist Alva, as it turns out, was actually the arch enemy of Hardware in the comics, taking advantage of the guy in his civiliian idtentiy and thus casuing him to launch a war on the asshole. He does transition into this series well though, being the one behind the gas that caused it and with the mayor agreeing to back off, planning to simply dump the info about the big bang on a disc then destroy everything for now till the heat dies down. Yup sounds like a corprate douchebag.
Static tails him, finds the lab and infiltrates it, stealing the disc.. but getting caught by Alva’s goon, and trapped in a glass prison, forced to use ALL his power to escape and barely getting out alive, but not before bouncing off alva’s car. Still he now has the proof.. and meanwhile Hotstreak, who I was wrong did get captured, is forced to take pill sbut spits them out once the orderly is gone. Dude.. WHY DIDN’T YOU WATCH HIM. Make sure he swallows that shit especially since, as he has no powers right now and can’t harm you.
Hotstreak escapes off screen and our heroes discuss the disc before he shows up, and we get a REALLY fucking amazing scene: Virgil ducks into an Alleway and ritchie is worried.. and Virgil disarms him with just one word responses Ritchie: Virg you can’t take him. Virgil: Gotta. Ritchie: Well at least wait for the fire department Virgil: Can’t. It’s simpile but it gets the point across: This is his fight, he can’t wait for help, and people need him. And this is what makes a true hero: It’s easy to be a hero when everythings going well.. but it’s the true ones who stick it out against the odds and fight anyway. And he’s going to. So we get one hell of a fight, though naturally Hotstreak burns up the disc. And I do like this as it dosen’t feel contrived.. yes Static could’ve left it with ritchie.. but he wasn’t thinking in the moment and dind’t really have time to think abotu the disc, only that people were being hurt and he was all they had between them and Hotstreak. It was no choice at all. Still that pisses Virgil off that the last night’s work is now worthless, and he fully charges up and curbstomps francis who retreats into a clearing. Hostreak brags when static follows, as even he’s figured out Static needs to be around metal, as he’s usually on his disc or the street, and in the park there suppodsidly isn’t any. But he’s not THAT smart as Virgil points out two things: one, he hoped to do this on PURPOSE so they wouldn’t be around people and no on e would get hurt and 2).. this is a city, there’s metal everywhere.. and he awesomely and cleverly proves it by unlodging a sewage pipe with his powers and dousing his foe, winning and proving his stuff. I love this solution, it’s a clever spider-man type way to disarm him, using smarts and the einvroment instead of just brute forcing it. Though the sewage part wasn’t intetional our hero still won and gets praise from the people dumb enough to follow the fight.
However at home Virgil points out it was Pyrrhic Victory and shows off his smarts by telling the tale behind it, which I didn’t know,because tv tropes didn’t exist yet: king pyrhus fought the romans and WON.. but had so little armies left that he still lost overall. That’s what this feels like to Virgil: he beat hotstreak but any chance at a cure for Bang Babies and Alva going to jail for causing them is gone. His mood does get a boost though as the doctor calls and reveals he’s fine, he just has a bit too much elctrolytes and just needs to lay off teh salt. He celebrates, we get a quick gag and the episode ends
Aftershock is another stellar episoe, giving us Virgil’s first super foe and a personal one at that, while showing some growth. As richie tells him he’s not virgil anymore he’s static and he can’t let his past get to him.. and he does’nt going from cowering in fear to easily beating his foe with simple logic. It’s a good followup that answers questions you may have from the first ep, like what does this do to virgil’s body, who supplied the gas, and why has no one done anything about this, and sets up another villian for Static in Alva. Great stuff. I highly recommend these episodes and the show as a whole: it’s fast paced, grounded and enjoyable, having just enough levity to not be too dour but just enough tension and stakes to be intresting. A throughly fantastic superhero show and one that i’d certainly love to revisit on this blog If you have an episode of static or the dcau in general you’d want me to cover, my comissions are open and details are on a tab on my blog or can be gotten simply by asking me via ask or dm. Tommorow we’re going deeper underground, there’s too much damage in this town as the Lena Retrospective continues. So expect gay ducks, straight ducks and some terrfirmains. See you next rainbow.
#static shock#static#virgil hawkins#richie foley#robert hawkins#sharon hawkins#hotstreak#milestone comics#dc comics#dc animated universe#dcau#dwayne mcduffie#robert l washington IIII#kids wb#hbo max#2000s#animation#black lives matter#black history month
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(100) Million Dollar Lawsuit
Intro | part1 | part2 | part3 | part4
We are on the last chapter (for now) and this the most chaotic one. Mainly because it doesn’t follow any kind of chronological order (or logical sense), it’s just Russ going in circles for literal years.
But I’ll try my best to condense it for you, so all you need to do is to keep your seat belt fastened until the aircraft stops completely.
Right after the failed Ari lawsuit, Russ goes back to his one and only love: Taylor Swift 💫 And he has learned a lesson — not a good lesson, mind you, but a lesson: small claims courts won’t take him anywhere. If he really wants to punish women for not complimenting his suit, he will have to file a multi-million dollar federal lawsuit.
But, since denying sex from The Russell isn’t illegal (yet), he had to come at it from a different angle. I’m going to give Russ a chance to explain himself first.
Before you ask: yes, the following was Russell’s response to a woman thanking Taylor for visiting an 8 year-old girl who was very badly burned in an accident.
As I’ve always said, it’s okay if you aren’t fluent in Bullshit. That’s what I’m here for.
You see, Russell views human interactions as a series of transactions: I make a tweet worth liking, you go on a date with me; I take you to Olive Garden, you give me a handie for free; I put on a suit, you hug me and smile; I write you a song and sue you, you produce said song. Whenever women don’t fulfil their side of the deal, he becomes enraged.
But the reason he has such a strong hate-boner for Tay, is because she seemed to also follow his same ‘moral code’. A kid makes a cute video, she visits them at the hospital. A fan writes her a letter inviting her to their wedding, she goes to the wedding. A couple of kids fold 1989 paper cranes for Andrea, Taylor invites them to one of her concerts.
Russ thought “this is a done deal”. He didn’t write that song for Taylor because he particular liked her; he just thought she’d be the most likely artist to produce it — or at least acknowledge his existence.
I mentioned before that Russ wrote a whole-ass book about this. And I think it’s as good a time as any to talk about it. For a short amount of time, Russell chilled out about the ✨100 million dollar lawsuit ✨ but my guess is that he thought his book would get him the same results as a lawsuit? To be fair, the book is fantastic. 5/5, would recommend.
He details the harassment he went through after suing Taylor Swift (the first time). Apparently old ladies at coffee shops would scream at him because he dared to sue Our Queen. A Mexican even pointed a gun at him (it wasn’t me, guys! Just a fellow countryman ❤️) and ordered Russ to drop the lawsuit. Computers at his job caught on literal fire because he was sent very powerful viruses. His friend Ken — who definitely exists! — was hit with a Molotov cocktail. Yep. 2016 was definitely the year people were willing to murder for Taylor Swift.
There’s also this brilliant dream sequence that involves an owl with the voice of Morgan Freeman, and Taylor’s agents guarding a tower in which she’s being held captive.
ALSO ALSO: an entire chapter is called “SHE CHOSE HIM OVER ME”. Taylor Swift chose Joe Alwyn — a man she actually knows — over a man she’s not even aware exists. Women, amiright?
I think Russell would enjoy the Kaylor community to a certain extent. Not the lesbian part, obviously: he doesn’t trust women who don’t want to touch his peen. I just mean the baseless hatred of Joe. Look, I made a little collage of his rants ❤️ tell me if any of this sounds familiar!
You know — I’ve been joking around a lot about Russell just wanting to do the nasty with Taylor. But you know me, I like joking around. In reality Russ only wants what is fair. He wants to put a stop to all these senseless acts of kindness perpetrated by Taylor ‘The Generous’ Swift.
This isn’t about him at all, actually. Shame on you for thinking there’s an ounce of greed in that selfless little body of his. HE’S DOING THIS TO PROTECT THE KIDS WITH CANCER!
There are no ulterior motives here! This isn’t about a date!
THIS IS NOT ABOUT A DATE AT ALL GUYS STOP SAYING THAT.
I think this is my favourite post of his, because– grammatically speaking –he doesn’t specify which of them is wearing the red dress. And that sends me every goddamn time.
Anyway. The book, as magnificent as it was, got him absolutely nowhere. I know, I can’t believe it either. So he went back to focus on his lawsuit. But apparently not enough, because he didn’t serve her properly..? Now, don’t expect me to understand this, because I am very stupid (so it’s quite a good thing that I haven’t sued anybody for millions of dollars) but something about him sending the lawsuit to her old legal team..? And then trying to force UPS to serve her? I think he even said he was going to serve her in the middle of one of her concerts... but I’m guessing that didn’t go as planned 🤷♀️ oops.
Of course, Russie wouldn’t allow such an anticlimactic ending. Can you guess what he did? Please tell me that you can guess what he did. HE MADE ANOTHER SONG 😭❤️
This one is called ‘I Don’t Get You, Taylor Swift’. Another masterpiece that we definitely didn’t deserve 🙌
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This was around April, 2019. By then I was being lured away by Kaylors, so I broke it off with Russ. I know that he filed a 3rd lawsuit against Taylor last year, which is just like the second one but hopefully this time he’ll be able to serve. And listen— I know that sounds like an awful thing to wish on Taylor, but I’d rather have Russell occupied suing a rich woman (who isn’t even going to deal with him), than a poor sex worker in Nevada. I bet TayTay would prefer that too.
Well guys, I’ve mentioned this a few times already, but I really had to be selective with the amount of information I was going to throw at you. I’ve avoided some of the shittier stuff he said or did, because I wanted to keep these posts as lighthearted as possible. I also didn’t touch on many things because they would just derail us. Like for example: one of the few lawsuits he has filed against someone who isn’t a woman, was against the state of Utah. I know, right? He’s trying to singlehandedly legalise prostitution in Utah, and even wrote a book (more like a pamphlet) brilliantly titled ‘Why I'm Making It Legal for Your 18 Year Old Daughter to Get In Bed with a Complete Stranger for Only 500 Bucks: A Short Essay from a Pro Se Litigant who is Challenging the Utah Brothel Bans’.
I copy-pasted that title guys, I swear to god.
The book is very graphic. This one I certainly do not recommend as I still suffer nightmares because of it.
Soren is a character who also had to be cut out — which is a shame because he really tried to be a good christian and help Russell. Not as in “I support you, Russell” but as in “why don’t you take a nap, Russell”. Turns out, even cinnamon rolls have a limit. Russ, of course, blames Taylor Swift for the fact that he’s losing his friends. I’m not joking — it’s an article in his lawsuit:
Greer has lost family relationships, friend connections and business connections because of the trauma of Taylor Swift. His family tells him to "get over it," resulting in shouting matches and strained relationships. Greer's friends get annoyed by his focusing on the trauma of it, when nobody knows the pain of getting rejected by a public figure — twice — and the fallout that has resulted from it.
Russell embodies that comic/meme of the little guy who puts a stick in his bicycle’s wheels and then blames Taylor Swift when he inevitably falls.
Sooooo...
Maybe someday I’ll write a post about Russ’ latest antics. I know he still posts stupid stuff on Facebook, which he later deletes. He shined especially bright at the peak of the BLM movement. He also plead guilty to electronic communications harassment— did you see that conviction coming? Yes, yes you did 😌
Regarding Taylor, I read that Russ knew someone who knew Todrick Hall — and Russ sent him a song and video for Taylor. All he got back was a Cease and Desist letter. But I’d have to do a bit of digging to get the details. I was already so overwhelmed with organising the information I was previously aware of, that I decided to leave the newer stuff for another time. You know, once I’ve had some time to inform myself... as well as a really long shower.
Since I left so much shit out, I’ll be taking questions if you have any. And if you can muster the courage to ask them. I’m weirdly proud of being some kind of Russell encyclopaedia. I might not have much going for me...
There’s no ‘but’ — that was the complete statement.
Before I go, I wanted to add this screenshot. I absolutely love it because it summarises ✨The Russell Experience✨. Russ wants Taylor to know pain, poverty and punishment. But when asked “why?” his answer is just “oh, I was ignored lol”
*none of the screenshots are mine
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June 2020 Reading Wrap Up
This was another reread month for me, and possibly the most books I’ve read in a month ever. I began June with a camping trip and started my internship at a local museum. Here’s to July also being a successful month!
1. The Wrath and the Dawn by Renee Ahdieh (4/5 stars): This has been on my tbr for a long time, and I knew how much hype it had back in 2015/16 so it was a book I still wanted to read and check out. I liked it overall, and it had a lot of tropes I enjoy. The Webtoons comic that is currently in progress is worth checking out too.
2. Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi (4/5 stars): A reread, since I had recently purchased the second book and I didn’t remember much from this one. I enjoyed the book again a second time.
2. Children of Virtue and Vengeance by Tomi Adeyemi (3/5 stars) I was sadly let down by this book, and I did not enjoy it nearly as much as the first. I still plan on finishing the series, but I hope the third one is better.
3. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by JKR (5/5 stars): The longest hp book, and still very very good
4. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by JKR (5/5 stars): Possibly my favorite of the series? I can never decide
6. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by JKR (5/5 stars): I enjoy this book more each time I read it and it may be a close second favorite of the series. This concluded my great 2020 HP quarantine reread! Too bad jkr had to be such a horrible person this spring
7. The Tales of Beedle the Bard by JKR (4/5 stars): some short, interesting wizarding fairy tales.
8. The Rose and the Dagger by Renee Ahdieh (4/5 stars): a decent, satisfying concluding to the story, I don’t think I liked this one quite as much as the first, but it was still good. I can tell by the writing that this is more of the younger side of YA and maybe if I had read it back when it was released I would have been over the moon for this duology.
9. Graceling by Kristin Cashore (5/5 stars): I read this series back in 2014/15ish and I’ve been meaning to reread them. I instantly remembered why and how I loved these books. Kasta’s arc is great and so important.
10. Fire by Kristin Cashore (5/5 stars): My favorite of the series and one of my top 5 favorite books of all time. I loved this one a lot when I was younger and this is just a book I could pick up and read whenever. Fire is such a great character and I could rave about this book for hours.
11. Bitterblue by Kristin Cashore (5/5 stars): I loved this one a lot more reading it this time than when I was younger. I love the politics and intrigue and just the way that the nation is trying to heal from the madman who was king. It brings up such good conversations about remembrance vs moving on and how we deal with grief and trauma. This book also has a special place in my heart now.
12. The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman (4.5/5 stars) This was a reread because I bought the illustrated edition that is simply gorgeous.
13. The Kiss of Deception by Mary E Pearson (3/5 stars) A really quick, romancey YA that was okay. I enjoyed the second half much better and the other two books are better also.
14. The Call of the Wild by Jack London (3/5 stars): A classic that I had surprisingly never read. I don’t have much to say about it.
15. The Sea Wolf by Jack London (4/5 stars) I really like London’s prose and this story was a wild ride. The basic premise is: Victorian twink gets picked up by a crazy but intelligent sea captain who he has deep philosophical conversations with while staring at the sea captains muscles. The second half diverted from the first and was a change in tone, but this book was just so buck wild that I couldn’t give it any less than 4 stars based purely off entertainment level.
So there you have it! My favorite book I read this month was Fire and Bitterblue (with HP too). My least favorite was either the Call of the Wild or Children of Virtue and Vengance. I plan on taking a bit of a break next month from YA fantasy books, as I’m a bit burnt out from them. I’m going to tackle some rereads and finish the Daevabad trilogy!
some stats:
rereads: 9
new reads: 6
female authors: 5
male authors: 2
poc authors: 2
YA: 12
fiction: 3
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GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER.
Can be used for RP and non-RP blogs to get to know a bit about the person behind the screen!
1. FIRST NAME: Jonathon! But you can call me Jawn. Or Jon. Or Dumb Blonde. Or Montgomery Salamackia. I don’t really care.
2. STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF: I am extremely double jointed. I can turn my hands around to do the owl-glasses thing on my head, I can bend my thumb back to my wrist, I can put my leg behind my back, the whole nine yards.
3. TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON: Eyes, voice and lips.
4. A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF: Baked Cheddar Ruffle chips. I could eat five bags right now and I’m not even joking. They are a godsend and I can live off them for the rest of my life. Incidentally, if I did that, I’d probably only live to 30. So.
5. A FOOD YOU HATE: Onion. Period. It’s just not good, man.
6. GUILTY PLEASURE: I... don’t think I have one? I like what I like, I love what I love. I have no shame in liking or loving them either. Don’t see much point.
7. WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN: My skin and whatever is on it!
8. SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS: Serious relationships. I’m actually demisexual, so flings for me don’t work out for me. I am physically incapable of just having a one night stand or somesuch. And if there is an emotional connection between me and someone I’m going to have a “fling” with, it wouldn’t be a fling to me anymore, because I probably have feelings for them at that point. And I think the idea of a fling is you part ways after some “fun”, right? So. Yeah. I put way too much thought into this answer, BUT HERE WE ARE.
9. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE: Nothing. Everything I’ve done up to this point or that has happened to me, has happened for a reason. I am who I am because of my experiences. --that said, i might go back and stop me from eating some food that gave me the worst food poisoning ever, but i digress.
10. ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON: Yes! But only towards friends and loved ones.
11. A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN: Lord Of The Rings Trilogy
12. FAVORITE BOOK: To Kill A Mockingbird. I’m not an avid reader as I used to be, but that book has always stuck with me. I could read it over and over again, especially on a rainy day in or otherwise.
13. YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE: A cheetah. Or a bear. Both.
14. TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS [IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG, YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL]: Riku/Kairi, Riku/Aqua, Deadpool/Rogue, Deadpool/Domino, Deadpool/Cable, Carol Danvers/Jessica Drew, Edward Elric/Sakura. Yes I put way more than 5. No I don’t care.
15. PIE OR CAKE: bOTH. STOP ASKING ME TO PICK. IT’S NAUGHTY.
16. FAVORITE SCENT: Vanilla and cherry blossoms. Also Lavender. And Jasmine. And lots others. It’s hard to say, because I have a hyper sensitive nose and love lots of smells.
17. CELEBRITY CRUSH: Mandy Moore, Hilary Duff and Jensen Ackles. Have you SEEN these people? GOD. WOW! WOWOWOWOW! wow.
18. IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO: New Zealand, Philippines, Australia, England, France, Germany, Sweden--pretty much everywhere. But mostly where my greatest friends are!
19. INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT: Extroverted introvert. I think. It depends. It’s Complicated-ert.
20. DO YOU SCARE EASILY: Yes, someone scared me the other day and I died. It’s a real shame.
21. IPHONE OR ANDROID: IPhone. This is coming from someone who has an Android and they have SO MANY PROBLEMS. GOD.
22. DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES: Yes. Not as much as I used to ironically, but that’s me being careful with my spending. I find that most modern games that call themselves “Triple AAA” experiences are either disappointments or bore the fuck out of me. Or I finish them way too quick. And there goes 70-80 bucks. But I do play all my old games, I consider myself someone engrossed and informed of most of what goes on in the gaming industry as a whole.
23. DREAM JOB: Becoming a screen writer for a gaming company in the future, specifically for CD Projekt Red.
24. WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS: Give a lot of it to my folks who rightfully deserve more than a million dollars, help them get a proper house of their own and whatnot. Pay off all my friends’ debts, help them get a proper foothold in life and so on. I really wouldn’t want much of it for myself, other than to pay maybe a year’s worth of rent and. food.
25. FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE: This is tricky. Because honestly, I don’t really HATE any characters that I’m not meant to hate, because bad writing and such goes to the writers’ fault. Not the character. That makes me sound boring, but WELL THAT’S HOW THE COOKIE CRUMBLES. If I had to pick one? Xehanort, I guess. Horrible man that fucking ruined so many lives. He can perish.
26. FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER: A lot. Supernatural, Anime, Comics, Nintendo, etc.
tagged by: stolen from @deadxscream
tagging: @hopesaved @xenovair @pyrhass @rosewiltd @heroeth and anyone else who wants to!
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Raising Bell (pt. 1)
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Defamation, Libel. 8 cts: First Presbyterian, Chittenden County &c. (see Appendix C)
* * *
“We’ve got her”, I said.
“Jason. I’ve told you a million times not to barge in here after— Who?”
The boss’s desk is big, but he makes it look small. Tall and fat, he always wears a dark brown coat that somehow makes him an even more imposing presence. You'd never catch him during working hours without a cigar in his mouth, and even then you’d never catch him for more than a couple seconds at a time. He wasn't the easiest guy to get along with, but the only reason this operation was still in the black was because that man worked around the clock to make it go. At the moment he was busy with paperwork, a task that he never started until 7:00 at the earliest, because “the real work goes on when the sun is up, kid!”
“Dorothy,” I said.
“Dorothy McAdams?”
“Dorothy McAdams.”
His eyebrows raise and he offers a breathless “Dorothy McAdams...” in reply. “How the hell did you manage that?”
“She came to town because of her brother, and the word on the street is that she’s sticking around for a year or two. Besides that,” I smile broadly, “I suppose it’s just to your credit for hiring such a charming talent agent, that got her to call you back before St. Anthony.”
He grunts. That was a little too showy for any other day, but with Dorothy in my pocket he’d damn well better cut me some slack.
“How much did it cost me?”
“Well, sir...”
“Snap it out Jason, I haven’t got all night.”
“Sorry, sir. Salary isn’t worth writing home about, double what the other four-in-handers get. And no signing bonus, just a condition.” I pause. He removes the cigar from his mouth and waves it in a circle, annoyed that I'm talking so slow. “We have to take on a kid named Timothy Courtson.”
“Who the hell is Timothy Courtson?”
“Does it matter?” I say, confidently.
“It might,” he snaps back. I guess he's right. Could be an arsonist, he always says. That sure would be bad for business, you know. I glance down at the file in my hand, and swallow hard.
“It doesn’t.”
“He any good?”
I’m sure the millisecond of silence was answer enough, but I answered him. “He can play C and D4.”
He puts the cigar back in his mouth and smirks. “So, no.”
“Positively dire, sir. But it’s no bonus with the kid; 2.5 without.” A second of silence is all it takes to get the words spilling out of my mouth. I spent too much money on her and if I lost the cash back… “Look, we just double up Karen and shift down the bass. The kid can sound like a dying cat and nobody’s going to know the difference down there. Garrett can teach him to mart properly and he’ll get the rest in the extra lessons from Tanya.”
He waves away my explanation. “Yeah, yeah, Jason. You made the right call. Good work.”
I bow my head, and take the opportunity to collect myself, knowing that the goodwill won’t last long. “There— sorry, there’s another thing. Louis told me to give you this.”
I hold the file out to him, and he recoils. “Does it look like I've got the time to read this thing?”
“Please, boss. It's important.”
He snatches the file in one hand, and with the other he grabs a pair of comically undersized glasses. Plopping them on his nose, he opens it and starts reading. It takes about three seconds for the color to drain from his face and his mouth to twist into a bitter scowl.
“What the SAM HELL is this, Jason?” I shrug. Could have been worse, if we're being honest.
“Just a list of notes that Louis kept when he had her, and everything he could find about her past behavior.”
He starts to shout at me again, but thinks better of it and rubs his temples. “Jesus Christ.”
“Language.” It’s instinct, but I know it’s a bad idea from the instant the word comes out of my mouth.
“Jesus Christ have mercy on this woman’s soul,” he snaps back. “But judging by this rap sheet, there’s not much chance of that.”
“She’s a genius. Every genius has some quirks.”
“Hell with quirks, Jason. This is a problem.”
The words hang silently in the smokey air of his office. He tosses the folder to the side and turns away from me, looking out the window at the view of nothing, just a few yellow streetlamps and the broad side of the next concrete building.
“You still want her, though, right?”
He’s quiet, still facing away from me, but there’s no hesitation. “Yes.”
“We’ll just have to keep a tighter leash than Louis did.”
“Take your good-for-nothing file and get out of here,” he grunts softly, and I oblige. As frightening as Boss can be when he’s a swirling rage, I know he’s much scarier when he gets that quiet.
* * *
A/N: As usual, you can see the entire writing process below the break.
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Second Draft
See savefile-1 for suggested edits. I don’t think we need to do a full rewrite of this, but if you get inspired, this would be the draft to do it. I think the original was pretty inspired, though, and it went though a lot of revision with all the retellings.
* * *
Okay, I’m just going to let this one go through on the second draft. It’s fine and I’m too drunk to do real edits. Maybe if I can stay sober for a whole night I’ll make it work, but fuck Coronavirus, amirite?
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First Thoughts
Okay, let’s do the first person thing.
What does Jason notice in their narration? They notice Boss, first and foremost. Boss is tempermental and demanding, so this is a survival mechanism. And with such sensitive information that he’s bringing, he needs to be hypervigilant.
What does he miss? Emotions, for anyone except Boss— and even then, only as they’re written in his face and serve as tells toward his behavior in the immediate future, or things that he does(n’t) want to hear.
Also, it’s not that he misses it, but he’s not going to wax too poetic about the office; he works there, and he works long hours too.
From all these outbursts, especially with Boss— forgivable because of the situation, but not ideal— we can tell that Jason doesn’t have much impulse control. Even though I don’t like the ‘not even for’ line, this characterization might not quite come through without it. Play around.
Dropping the F bomb feels just a little off. It's not about the “Language” outbust (that's part of what makes the joke); it's just that Boss is someone who commands enough respect that they don’t have to lash out to get what they want. And yes, this McAdams’ rap sheet is pretty wild but it just seems like he would say it a tad more eloquently.
You should probably, at some point, actually draft this rap sheet. For the extended version I can easily see each chapter starting with an item from the sheet, when the chapter is about shenanigans in that regard.
If we’re going to call this Chap 1 instead of Prologue, I could easily see the line item here being:
Defamation, Libel. 8 cts: First Presbyterian, Chittenden County &c. (see Appendix C)
I mean obviously I’m making this citation style up wholesale, which is okay because the real citations are in the appendix, duhhhhh. Also obviously I don’t need it to be Chittenden County, Vermont; but wherever it is, is presumably where Louis runs his empire.
==========
First Draft (written over multiple sessions)
“We’ve got her”, I said.
“Jason I’ve told you a million times not to barge in here with— Who?”
[Exposition]
“Dorothy,” I said.
“Dorothy McAdams?”
“Dorothy McAdams.”
His eyebrows raise and he offers a breathless “Dorothy McAdams...” in reply. He looks up at nothing in particular, visions of fame and fortune surely filling his head. “How the hell did you manage that?”
“She came to town because of her brother, and the word on the street is that she’s sticking around for a year or two. Besides that,” I smile broadly, “I suppose it’s just to your credit for hiring such a charming talent agent, that got her to call you back before St. Anthony.”
He grunts. That was a little too showy for any other day, but with Dorothy in my pocket he’d damn well better cut me some slack.
“How much did it cost me?”
“Well, sir...”
“Snap it out Jason, I haven’t got all night.”
“Not even for Dorothy McAdams?” Probably shouldn’t have said that; my wit got the better of me. He glares.
“No.”
“Sorry, sir. Salary isn’t worth writing home about, double what the other 4-in-handers get. And no signing bonus, just a condition.” I pause. He removes the cigar from his mouth with his hand, that he then waves in a circle, annoyed at my slowness. “We have to take on a kid named Timothy Courtson.”
“Who the hell is Timothy Courtson?”
“Does it matter?” I say, knowingly.
“It might,” he snaps back. I guess he’s right. He always is.
“It doesn’t.”
“He any good?”
I’m sure the millisecond of silence was answer enough, but he’s clearly not in the mood for games. “He can play C and D4.”
He puts the cigar back in his mouth and smirks. “So, no.”
“Positively dire, sir. But it’s either 0 bucks with the kid, or 2.5 without.” He doesn’t answer, and my words start spilling out. “Look, we just double up Karen and shift down the bass. The kid can sound like a cat on meth and nobody’s going to know the difference down there. Garrett can teach him to mart properly and he’ll get the rest in the extra lessons from Tanya.”
He waves away my explanation. “Yeah, yeah, Jason. You made the right call. Good work.”
I swallow, knowing that the goodwill won’t last long. “There—there’s another thing. Louis told me to give you this.”
I pass over the file. He grabs a pair of comically undersized glasses, glaring sarcastically at me. Putting them on, he opens it and starts reading. It takes about three seconds for the color to drain from his face and his mouth to twist into a bitter scowl.
“What the SAM HELL is this, Jason?”
“Just a list of notes that Louis kept when he had her, and everything he could find about her past behavior.”
He starts to shout at me again, but thinks better of it and rubs his temples. “Jesus Christ.”
“Language.” It’s instinct, but I know it’s a bad idea from the instant I say it.
“Jesus Christ have mercy on this woman’s soul,” he snaps back. “But judging by this rap sheet, there’s not much chance of that.”
“She’s a genius. Every genius has some quirks.”
“These aren’t some fucking quirks, Jason.”
The words hang silently in the smokey air of his office. He tosses the folder to the side and turns away from me, looking out the window at the view of nothing, just a few yellow streetlamps and the broad side of the next concrete building. I look at him. He doesn’t move.
“You still want her, though, right?”
He’s quiet, but there’s no hesitation. “Yes.”
“We’ll just have to keep a tighter leash than Louis did.”
“Get the hell out of here,” he grunts softly, and I oblige. As frightening as Boss can be when he’s a swirling rage, I know he’s much scarier when he gets that quiet.
==========
Who needs Brainstorming or Freewriting?
What actually is happening here is that I wrote this almost four months ago so the writing process looks a lot different than I’m trying to do now. But I really wanted to get this polished up a bit, so I committed to posting it soon.
#bells#handbells#music#handbell choir#noir#i think?#cornering the handbell noir market#fiction#prompt response#from a real life friend#the pt. 1 in the title is what we call... aspirational#still not really in the mood to do longform fiction#but this absolutely needs a continuation#not sure about the title#i really want it to just be like the name of the church#or one of those cheesy band names#'Dorothy and the Carillons'#i have literally no idea how long it took to write this#it's been on and off for like four months
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CAS is an essential part of the IB programme, but coming up with ideas for it can be very challenging, especially if money is tight. Therefore, I present to you 99 Free (or at the very least, inexpensive) CAS ideas!
Please like/reblog if this helped you, and so that it can help others! ❤︎
Creativity
1. Learn a new language: Free apps or websites like Duolingo or Mondly can help you learn a variety of languages. Here is a post about the language availability on various apps. You can even practice by manually translating song lyrics, which really is just an excuse to listen to Bollywood hits, K-pop, or even Shakira- there’s no reason to not have a little fun with it! If you do just 10 minutes a day you’ll get over an hour of CAS done every week. If you do 20 minutes a day, you’ll get over 2 hours a week, and by spending a little more than 20 minutes on one or two days you can easily get 2 and a half hours of CAS a week. 10 weeks of this and you’ll have 50% of your creativity hours done, and all while having fun listening to songs, and not having to spend a penny!
2. Making gifs or edits: You’re already on tumblr, why not use it as an opportunity for CAS? Making original content takes time, and will quickly fill up those 50 hours! If you don’t want your CAS supervisor see which fandoms you’re a part of, make school related content, for example making subject moodboards (self spon), edits of your required reading (maybe typography for your favourite quotes?), or giffing your favourite historical figures. If you’re experienced you can mass produce content, and if you’re a beginner you can check that “new skills” box! GIMP is free, and Photoshop has a free trial. After that you can either pay for it, or perhaps scour the internet for alternative ways to keep it (though you didn’t hear it from me). If you fulfill requests then it counts as service as well.
3. Art: You can either create digital art using the programs listed in the previous suggestion, or you can do it the old fashioned. While art supplies tend to cost a lot, there is no shame in making sketches or comics using good ol’ ink and lead pencils that you already have in your pencil case, and doing it in a notebook. If you’re willing to splurge, there are tons of ways to go with your art!
4. Photography: While a good camera is expensive, you probably already have a camera in your phone. The quality won’t be ideal, but you can easily practice photographing different motifs in different styles. You can also retouch and enhance the photos with GIMP and Photoshop, as mentioned above.
5. Join or create a low maintenance club: Baking and music may be fun, but ingredients cost money, and so do instruments. A debate club or film club won’t cost anything, except maybe if you buy popcorn! Regular meetings will ensure regular CAS hours.
6. Write poetry: Writing a good poem can take many, many hours, which in the context of CAS is a good thing! Take a stroll in the forest or by the seaside and feel those creative juices flowing!
7. Write a book: You know that idea for a novel you’ve had for ages? Write it down. It may feel awkward to show to your writing to your supervisor, but think of it as a free editor or focus group. This is a great excuse to fulfill your dream of becoming an author. Who knows? Maybe the final product is good enough to send to a publisher, or to self-publish on amazon so you can make some money!
8. Make Redbubble designs: A spin-off of the digital art suggestion. Whether it’s simple text or intricate fanart, Redbubble is a great place to display your creativity, and can even make you some money if you’re lucky!
9. Join a choir: Privately owned choirs may cost to join, but your local church will probably let you in for free.
10. Play an instrument: If you don’t already own an instrument, this isn’t a great option on a budget. However, some of you will already own a keyboard or a guitar, and may even already be taking lessons. If you are, then there is no reason not to use it for CAS. And if you own an instrument but don’t go to classes, simply practice on our own or watch tutorials on YouTube.
11. Dungeons and Dragons: Shocking, I know, but it is actually quite easy to justify D&D as creativity. A friend of mine succeeded in doing this, stating that it involved team work, initiative, commitment and problem solving. It goes to show that most things can be justified as CAS if you word everything well enough.
12. Makeup, nail art, or body paint: I highly doubt that applying mascara in the morning counts, but there are certainly many ways to express yourself with makeup. SFX, intricate patterns and new techniques certainly require creativity.
13. Dance: Dance will be expanded on in the Action section, but dance is not only exercise, but a form of expression which requires passion and creativity.
14. Learn coding: Coding has become a valuable skill in the recent years. There’s an endless amount of sources online, many of them free. Not only is it an interesting skill, but it’s an impressive skill to see on a résumé.
15. Make a game or an app: Game development is certainly not easy, but that just means that there will be plenty of hours for you to log! It also has the potential to make you money, which of course is a plus!
16. Start a YouTube channel: Buying a microphone and camera is expensive, but unless you’re aiming to become a YouTube star there’s no reason to spend money on equipment. CAS doesn’t discriminate between a $500 camera and a built in webcam, or between Adobe Premiere and Windows Movie Maker, so utilize what you have.
17. Join the school newspaper: The school newspaper is a great way to ensure regular hours, and can even count as service. There are many different types of articles, so you can get some variety in it too.
18. Send in articles to a newspaper: If you think the school newspaper is aiming too low, you can always submit articles to local newspapers or online magazines such as Buzzfeed. Your submissions may not always be published, but it’s worth a try, and the hours will count anyway!
19. Make a PSA video: There are tonnes of important causes you can promote, and a PSA video is a great way to do it. Furthermore, the service aspect will count for service hours, and if you do it with a friend it can count as a CAS project.
20. Acting: There are plenty of auditions around, whether it be to a school play or primetime TV. You don’t even need to get a role, simply auditioning is enough as you’ve been a risk taker (your coordinator will appreciate you using the IB learner profile in your reflections), and been creative.
21. Making a short film: Combining he last two points, making a video and acting, take this chance to make a short film (or a full length one depending on your ambition) and Kenneth Branagh’ it as producer, director, writer and lead.
22. Learn animation: Self-explanatory, and a very impressive skill to have.
23. Free online courses: Whether it be public speaking or anthropology, there are many free courses online which can be justified as creativity. Some courses may even look good on your résumé.
24. Make a board game: Board games are a lot of fun, but harder to make than they seem. Your creation might not be the next Monopoly, but it may provide some entertainment when you’re meeting your friends, and wouldn’t playing games with your friend be a great way to get CAS hours?
25. Gardening: A beautiful garden is a challenge to create, but challenges are a part of CAS! From a terrarium to a full scale English garden, there are many options for gardening. Here are some cheap ideas.
26. Make a podcast: Podcasts have become quite popular in the last few years, so try it out for yourself! There are many different topics you could cover, some which could count as service. Discussing one of those topics with a friend could be a great idea for a CAS project.
27. Make a website: This one is quite self-explanatory. Like the podcast, you could easily add a service aspect into it, and working with a friend could make it a CAS project.
28. Translating transcripts of spoken word poem: this one comes from @kahvia, who says “I found the transcripts of the poems on the Internet (some are hard to get, so once I just messaged the author on Facebook) and translated into my native language. It's hard and time consuming, but can be done on the go, so you can do CAS when commuting.”
29. Calligraphy: I must confess that I don’t know a lot about calligraphy, but I assume that amazing tools can cost quite a bit. But remember, CAS isn’t about quality, it’s about quantity, so screw expensive tools and just go for it!
30. Create your own font: Like with most things in life, wikihow has got your back.
31. Make an interactive story: Cool and largely uncharted territory, and definitely a unique experience. This will help you out.
32. Learn origami: Origami is beautiful, and the possibilities are endless. Although origami paper is preferred, it is possible to use regular paper too, which will save you some bucks. Google and YouTube have a million tutorials, so they got you covered.
33. Make a Studyblr: Do you have any idea how many hours I’m getting just by making this list?
Action
1. Go jogging: Perhaps the most obvious free exercise is jogging. All you need is a pair of sneakers and you’re good to go (jogging)!
2. Play Pokémon Go: If you are still one of the few people playing Pokémon Go, walk until your eggs hatch. You could simply walk, but games make it a bit more interesting. On your CAS worksheet you can simply say you plan on walking 2km a day, but in your head and your heart it’s an epic quest for Pikachu.
3. Yoga: Yoga has numerous health benefits and is a great choice for those who don’t like exercise. Power yoga is an option for those who prefer a challenge, but beginner’s yoga isn’t too strenuous and can easily be done at home. Although a yoga mat is preferable, a lot of the moves can be done on the bed or just the floor. YouTube and the app store have thousands of free options, so there’s plenty to choose from, from 10 minutes to an hour. Half an hour before bed each day will have you finishing up your activity hours in no time!
4. Swimming in a public pool, lake or ocean: There are some public pools, but many pools require an entrance fee. The ocean does not. It’s not as easy to swim laps as in a pool, but it will do in a pinch.
5. A 30 day exercise challenge: The internet is full of 30 day exercise plans. Although they’re usually not an ideal fitness plan it will challenge your commitment, and you can get a month worth of CAS.
6. Biking: Assuming you already have a bike, biking is a very cheap method of exercise, but very efficient. Biking to and from school will count, and if takes about 20 minutes back and forth a day, you’ll get 100 minutes in a school week. It’s regular exercise, and therefore it’s regular CAS.
7. Free apps: There’s an almost unlimited amount of exercise apps in the app store, and many of them are free. Try them out! Even a 7 minute exercise app can be useful. 49 minutes every week can be rounded up to 50 minutes, which is a great place to start if you’re new to CAS.
8. Dog walking: If you have your own dog, good for you! Take the adorable little pupper out for a walk. And if not, ask a neighbour if you can steal their dog take their dog for walks. Another case of regular exercise resulting in regular CAS hours.
9. Dance: Not all dancing has to be taught in class. Online you will find numerous tutorials for various dance styles, from belly dancing to hip hop. And if you choose to learn a dance style from another culture, like India’s kathak or the Latin samba you get to learn about other cultures and therefore be a global citizen (as the IBO likes to tell us to be).
10. Dance apps or games: This activity isn’t as focused on independent learning as the previous dance suggestion, but it works nonetheless. Games like DDR or Just Dance are found in many households, so you might already have access to them at home. Just Dance includes an exercise mode, so give it a go! And if you don’t have them, there’s always the free Just Dance app, which should do the trick, memes aside.
11. PlayStation or Wii games: Certainly not a cheap option if you don’t already have the consoles or games, but if you have Wii Sports or PlayStation 3 Sports Champions you have a great way to exercise without leaving your living room.
12. Self-defense: When you can’t afford to go to a self-defense class, we have the internet. Learning proper self-defense is sadly very important, but since it’s important to learn, why not learn it for CAS? Practice with a friend until you’re a ninja, or until you have 15 hours of activity completed.
13. Celebrity workout tape: You know the ones. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a Jane Fonda tape from the 80s which you recreate in a leotard, but then again, why not? You could use a random person’s workout tape, but I think Jane Fonda can be trusted (I mean she’s 80 and have you seen how good she looks?). Cheesy as celebrity workout tapes are, especially the ones from the 80s, there’s something special about them. Many of them can be found online, so give them a go, leotard or no!
14. Jump rope: Chances are you still have a jump rope lying around the house from when you were a kid. Rope jumping is actually very good exercise, so try to find your old toy again- it will come in handy!
15. Chair workouts: Fulfill your dream of becoming Britney Spears with some chair exercises. There’s no need to buy fancy equipment when you can just go to your kitchen instead.
16. Basketball: No need to join a team as long as you have a hoop at home. Many people still have a hoop over the garage door from when they were children, why not utilize them?
17. Join a school club: Of course, any club works, but most clubs will require an entry fee. School owned ones are unlikely to ask for one.
18. Hiking: Fresh air, breath-taking views, and all that crap.
19. Running competitions: 5k runs are frequently put on, why not join one?
20. Walk home: Is it cheating? Probably. But walking is activity, so why shouldn’t you take advantage of it? You don’t need to specify that you’re walking home, you can simply say a daily walk of x minutes.
21. Basic gymnastics or acrobatics: When I say basic, I mean basic. Somersaults, cartwheels, the works. It’s technically exercise, and you can say you’re doing acrobatics without going into further details.
22. Tree climbing: An alternative to rock climbing, only it’s free.
23. Use stockings as resistance bands: I honestly don’t know how well this works, but google said it works so it must be true.
24. Water gymnastics: Once again, doing things properly is overrated. Go to a pool and try to figure it out yourself, or with a friend. It may look ridiculous, but you’ll be trying. Another option is to do it some meters away from an ongoing class, because stealing exercise kinda works according to an episode of Will and Grace.
25. Badminton: When I say badminton, I don’t mean fancy professional badminton, I mean “get a gas station badminton racket and play in the park or your lawn”.
26. Foraging: Go look for mushrooms in a forest and keep track of how long you’ve been out and how long you’ve walked.
27. Orienteering: Although I personally despise orienteering with a violent passion, I have many friends who enjoy it, one who even does it for fun. Orienteering can be planned with friends, and can take place in a forest or a city.
28. Treasure hunt: Almost an extension of orienteering, you can plan a treasure hunt in a city or a forest. With the added element of the treasure hunt, there’s a case for creativity, and doing it in a group can work as a CAS project.
29. Frisbee: Frisbees are cheap and can be bought at a gas station, and work as a fun group activity.
30. Help the elderly: As you will see in the Service section, elderly neighbours might need some help cutting grass or shoveling snow. And as anyone who has ever shoveled snow knows, it’s a surprisingly efficient exercise.
31. Gym trial: Many gyms offer a free trial for a day or a week, or even a month, which is easy to take advantage of. Use the free days to their full extent, and if that isn’t enough, go to another gym chain and use their trial. Obviously this won’t be a long term thing, but if you work long, and not necessarily hard, 15 hours should be manageable.
32. Pilates: An alternative to yoga that works as well at home as at a gym.
33. PARKOUR: … don’t die.
Service
1. Join Amnesty: Amnesty is an organization that raises awareness for a number of important issues, and often collect signatures for their causes. Be the one who hunts for signatures and watch the service hours roll in.
2. Join the Red Cross, or any other charitable organization: The Red Cross needs no introduction. It is perhaps the most famous charity in the world, and does a lot of good. However, there have been controversies surrounding it in the past, so if you want to support another charity instead, go for it! Find a charity that is important to you and the service hours will feel even sweeter.
3. Blood donation, or spreading awareness for it: Donating blood will often get you a small payment, and you can’t do it often, so it isn’t ideal for service. However, going to your local donation center and asking for pamphlets and sign up forms to bring to school or a stand at the mall is a great way to raise awareness and encourage other people to go donate blood. It’s one of those things people talk about doing but always put off, so be the person that changes their mind-set!
4. Helping out at school events: School discos, bake sales, or bazaars always need volunteers, and it’s a great way to get many hours done at once. Contact the PTA at your school or other schools in the area and see when upcoming events are taking place and you’ll easily get at least 15 hours of service done. If you really phrase things well you might even be able to get some creativity hours.
5. Dog walking: Expanding on the point in Action, you can walk other people’s dogs as service. Ask a neighbour if they need help, or post an ad at the grocery store. Service hours and spending time with dogs, what more could you want?
6. Volunteer at an animal shelter: Like the previous point, this really is just a great excuse to hang out with animals. Check the local shelter to see if they need any helpers!
7. Volunteering at a senior center: Senior centers are always in need of more hands. Whether it’s cleaning the resident’s rooms, walking with them or just making sure they have some company, there will always be something the center will need help with.
8. Volunteering at a hospital: Not all hospitals allow untrained volunteers, but some hospitals do. If you volunteer at a hospital you will not perform the duties of a nurse, but instead simply provide some company for the people staying there.
9. Homeless shelter: Homeless shelters always need more volunteers. There’s a variety of roles you can fill, from handing out food to collecting donations. No matter what it is you do, it will have a great impact on the people who rely on the shelters.
10. Make a PSA video: As mentioned in the Creativity section, making a PSA video is a great idea for a CAS project as it combines creativity and service, and results in lots of hours.
11. Bake sales: Baking yourself will obviously cost a bit, but most ingredients can probably already be found in your home. Set up a stand in the school corridor, and find a charity to donate the profits to.
12. Volunteer at a library: Most libraries have a variety of volunteer opportunities, from tutoring children to teaching seniors how to use technology. Go to your local library and see what volunteer programs they have!
13. Shoveling snow: Winter doesn’t treat people who live in cold places well. In case of snow you might have several neighbours struggling to clear the snow from their lot. Offer them a hand and feel the CAS hours piling up!
14. Cutting grass: Like shoveling snow, cutting grass is something people need to get done, but it’s backbreaking and time consuming. Go around the neighbourhood and see if anyone needs any help with it!
15. Assisting elderly neighbours: If you have any elderly neighbours, offer to do chores for them, like cleaning and cooking. They’ll be sure to appreciate it, and it can get you semi regular CAS hours.
16. Car washing: No, this does not have to include a red bikini, but it does give you two options: either offer to wash cars for free as service, or to set a price so you can give the profits to charity. All you need is a sponge and some water, so get scrubbing!
17. Scouts: Most scout groups require a member fee, so it’s not ideal to become a scout if you aren’t one. However, if you’re already a member, being a scout leader will get you many, many hours, so take advantage of it!
18. Student union: Student unions work hard, and can therefore get you many hours. There will be a wide range of activities to organize and participate in, so you’ll have some much needed variety.
19. Prom committee: If you’re not interested in joining the student union, there may be some committees that are separate from the union. Prom committees, graduation committees, etc., are all great options that can get you plenty of hours.
20. Babysitting: Give your neighbours a night off by offering to babysit for free. Remember, it doesn’t count as service if you get paid, so make sure the only money you get is to pay for dinner.
21. Tutoring: Some schools have study halls, or a homework club, aka after school homework help for the younger kids. And if your school doesn’t offer it already, ask if you can start it. It’ll be a chance for you to tutor younger kids, and if nobody shows up and wants your help, so what? You offered the service, and even if no one came, the hours count.
22. Start a club: Being a member of a club will get you creativity hours, starting one will get you both. Do it with a friend and you’ve got a CAS project.
23. Join a big brother/big sister organization: There are several of these organizations going around, and a popular one in the US is bbbs.org, which states that their mission is to “Provide children facing adversity with strong and enduring, professionally supported one-to-one relationships that change their lives for the better, forever.” A noble cause for sure, and one which your CAS coordinator will adore. It will tick most outcome boxes, and you will gain something from it too.
24. Volunteer in a political campaign: If there are any elections happening in your country soon, get involved for the good of your community, and your CAS hours!
25. Volunteer at a hotline: Many countries have crisis hotlines that often need more volunteers, why not help out?
26. Start Kiva team: kiva.org is a great website that revolves around microloans. It has the option to make or join teams of lenders. Make a team and try to gain members, spread awareness and get donations to lend money to people in need around the world. As they are loans, you get money back in kiva credit which you can then donate to someone new, thus creating a circle of good. Team meetings to decide which individuals, countries or field partners to donate to next will get you many CAS hours.
27. Plan an athletic event for charity: Whether it be a 5k, orienteering, a treasure hunt (all as mentioned in the activity section), or anything else you can think of, it’s a great way to involve a community, and any entrance fee can be donated to charity. By participating yourself, you can tick all three CAS boxes, and doing it with one or more people makes it a great CAS project.
28. Writing letters to soldiers: This may not be an option everywhere, but some countries have organizations where you can write letters to the soldiers overseas who don’t have anyone writing to them, which is sure to be a morale booster.
29. Host a free workshop: Workshops are a great way to learn new skills, or to teach your skills. Maybe you can teach something you learned from/for your creativity hours!
30. Neighbourhood watch: Neighbourhood watches are a great way to help ensure safety in your local area, so either join one or start one.
31. Volunteer to help immigrants and/or refugees: There are many organizations that work to help immigrants and refugees become integrated in society, whether it be activities for children or events to help newly arrived people learn the local language. Look up any local organizations and see if they’re looking for volunteers!
32. Park maintenance: Many parks need help with a lot of maintenance, from cleaning to repainting benches. Contact whoever is in charge and see if they need any volunteers.
33. Studyblr: Coming up with 99 free CAS ideas is surprisingly time consuming, and so is everything else about a studyblr, so give it a go and get those hours!
#International Baccalaureate#ib#creativity action service#CAS#studyblr#CAS ideas#ibo#study blog#study#school#ib programme#ib program#IB problems#tagging everything i can think of because this took SO LONG TO MAKE#y'all... i started mid november#hanna was here#i got 99 problems but CAS aint one
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The Roundup: June 2018
Look, I’m as shocked as you are. I had no idea that last month when I set up a recurring feature, I’d actually be able to stick to it. It turns out that once a month is way more feasible for me than once a week (like Bargain Bin or Album of the Week, god rest their souls). Maybe I’ll try for every two weeks with some different features.
It’s been a really hard few weeks. Not for me necessarily, but for the world at large, shit sucks. Being constantly angry and vigilant is exhausting, but not being angry feels irresponsible. I want to write about the things I love for you all to read, but it all feels so unimportant in the face of this goddamn administration.
So, to keep both of us balanced, with every entry on the Roundup this month I’ll include One (1) horrifying fact about the world today, and One (1) extremely good fact about the world today. Hope you enjoy.
Hausu: I thought I knew the basic premise of this movie (a realistic fantasy about the atomic bomb) and I was extremely, extremely wrong. Part of me wished someone had told me just how weird and silly and somber this movie was going to be, but I’m honestly glad I didn’t know. I won’t spoil too much of it for you, but suffice to say this is NOT a realistic fantasy in any way. Almost nothing about this movie is realistic. A man gets turned into bananas, for christ’s sake.
Mitch McConnell stole a Supreme Court seat, and it seems unlikely that the Democratic party will attempt to steal Kennedy’s back.
Otters hold hands while they sleep so they don’t drift apart.
Splatoon 2’s Octo Expansion: I loved Splatoon 2’s main story, so I was very much looking forward to this. The entire aesthetic of it is slick and charming as hell- I love the idea of exploring a rundown subway line and uncovering different weird sea creatures, but the actual missions were hit and miss for me. It was a toss-up each mission if you were going to get “inventive level design” or “difficulty for difficulty’s sake”. The 8 Ball levels were absolutely fantastic, and just the right level of challenging, but every single ‘ride the rails’ level was hell. It’s hard to be mad about 80+ levels for 20 bucks, plus a new character model, but I felt like the Splatoon team vastly overestimated the skill level of most of their players. I skipped the majority of the latter half of the expansion, and it feels super frustrating to not be able to play the game I bought.
There are currently state-sponsored concentration camps all throughout the southern U.S.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a young socialist, just ousted the chair of the Democratic Caucus.
Incredibles 2: The Incredibles is my favorite Disney movie, bar none, so I had pretty high hopes for The Incredibles 2. I’m not sure it reached them, but that has more to do with me than the movie itself. I digress; this movie kicked ass. The animation was gorgeous and beautiful, and the philosophy behind it was a huge step up from the accidentally-objectivist plot of the first one. The focus on Elastigirl was much appreciated this round, and actually seeing Bob struggling with fatherhood was really enjoyable. This is an excellent follow-up to The Incredibles, and one of my favorite Pixar movies to date.
There are currently two living white rhinos, both in captivity.
Science has proven your cat genuinely loves you.
Black Bolt: I really, really loved Saladin Ahmed’s 12 issue Black Bolt run. Christian Ward’s art is as vibrant and beautiful here as it is in ODY-C, and that space-opera feeling serves the Inhumans so, so well. Black Bolt is a really interesting character, and I feel like Ahmed and Ward did him justice. I was a little bummed when the art style switched over during issue 7 and Frazier Irving took over- not because I missed Ward, but because the almost impressionistic style of Irving was really beautiful and fit the story’s shift in setting, but didn’t stick around for the rest of the run. I also thought the ending was a little rushed- I enjoyed it still, but I would have liked a few more issues to pad out Black Bolt and Blinky’s story. I know this is comic books, so it probably continues in some other series, but still.
If Trump gets the second supreme court seat, he can make gay marriage illegal again.
Cows are known to have best friends.
Jabberwocky: I really wanted to like this movie. I love almost every Monty Python production (lookin at you, Meaning of Life), and the concept seemed like a knockout. Unfortunately, the end result is just…boring. There’s very few jokes, and even fewer worth laughing at. I think I only genuinely laughed once, during a scene with a catapult and a murderous religious fanatic. I had really high hopes for Jabberwocky, and it’s hard to imagine more ways it could have been disappointing.
They’re going to keep making Jurassic World movies.
There’s a video of Kermit The Frog singing Talking Heads’ Same As It Ever Was
The Vision: I’ve read Tom King and Gabriel Hernandez’ The Vision three times now, and I never love it less. It’s genuinely imepeccable. It’s one of the only superhero comics I’ve read that feels like literature. It’s about synthezoids and Ultron and Victor Mancha and a bright green dog and it feels like fucking Shakespeare. I love it so, so much, and I keep coming back to it. Also Viv Vision is the greatest character in anything ever and I love her so much.
We’ll never get to see Edgar Wright’s Ant-Man.
By all reviews, Ant Man & The Wasp is a much better movie than Ant Man.
Mamma Mia: This is a cheerful fuckin movie. This is the kind of movie we need right now. Just great acting, silly writing, and ABBA. I’ve been listening to Mamma Mia and Super Trouper on repeat since I saw it. There’s some genuine tearjerker stuff here, naturally, but by and large this movie is fucking saccharine. Can’t recommend it enough.
Children as young as three are being separated at the border and forced to represent themselves at deportation hearings.
Mamma Mia 2 exists, and will be in theaters shortly.
Dr. Strangelove: This is another movie I wanted to like more than I did, but I certainly liked it more than Jabberwocky. I didn’t really appreciate this movie until after I saw it because I didn’t even realize Peter Sellers is 3 different characters! I genuinely had no idea. Dr. Strangelove is interesting mostly because of how it well it balances its cynicism with its laugh-out-loud moments. There are bits in this movie I’m still quoting, and that’s as good an endorsement as any.
Its entirely possible that Roe v. Wade will be overturned.
Modders are hard at work to make Zelda fully playable in Breath of the Wild.
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Homestuck Day 3 (Coolkids and also John Is here Too)
Alright folks I’m back, this time with 8 hours of sleep and a bracing morning lake jump under my belt. (Okay so it was almost noon but still) Point is I’m ready to jump back into Homestuck and maybe even make some progress this time. Anything could happen. Including a weird flash animated all-caps BETA LAUNCH.
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=5
I wasn’t expecting sound on the next page and the typing sound effect about made me eat my own hand. In other news, we’re doing the Pooplord thing again so that’s always a good time.
Seems like this is the same nonsense from before redone in flash.
Update: Ooo it’s interactive this time though, that’s pretty neat.
Well that was a strange little side path. Did this actually come before the main comic or what? I am confused. (Breaking: I’ve just been informed that this was indeed a “beta” that came out before the stuff I’ve been reading. What fortuitous timing!) That aside though, we can now return to our irregularly scheduled Homestuck.
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=001922
I wonder why Sburb is late. Perhaps this is where the plot kicks in?
I can actually relate to this, It was a wedding though, not a birthday, in my case. After a while the very concept of frosting becomes nauseating.
MORE IMPORTANTLY THOUGH John’s getting a message! Could this be the fabled “character interaction” I see on the distant horizon?
Dear Lord John. This wallpaper is why bad things happen to good people.
If I know anything about programming though, it’s that “FUCK FUCK FUCK” AND “AAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH” are very realistic file names.
Also are those file extensions carrot cake and tildeath? I . . . have nothing to say.
Let’s open Pesterchum. (I’m just gonna take a moment here to appreciate how good that name is for a messaging application)
So John is ectoBiologist I take it. Ecto as in ectoplasm of course, because by his wallpaper he’s apparently a massive Ghostbusters fanboy of the worst possible kind anyone could possibly achieve.
It appears that he has only three friends, which seems a bit low even for a weirdo with three buck teeth and a penchant for pranks. Maybe it’s just showing the important ones for narrative convenience.
turntechGodhead huh? Someone has an ego on them. Fun fact about the word godhead: it and “maidenhead” represent the only two surviving uses in English of the suffix -head, which derives from Middle English -hede and is related to -hood as in “fatherhood”. There you learned a thing today. Now let’s answer DJ Ego
I did not expect the first conversation in Homestuck to be about peeing in apple juice. I’m not sure what this says about the future of Homestuck, but it has me concerned, to be sure.
John talks exactly like what I’d expect of him. He has the discerning tastes of a starving cinematic billy goat. He uses punctuation though, something that TG evidently is too cool for. Speaking of which, I’m going to hazard a wild, completely unsubstantiated guess that he’s the shades-wearing “coolkid” I’ve seen around the internets.
He went to the trouble of buying a game that he isn’t going to bother to play because it “sounds boring”. Classic coolkid behavior. Trust me; I have university credits in biology so you know I’m legit.
There’s absolutely no way that Game Bro isn’t the best the world of gaming journalism has to offer. Bro.
I guess all my trees weren’t terribly proper either. This is troubling.
I uh, really don’t think that’s how the mail works, John.
Then again, he doesn’t look like someone who would know, does he?
Look at that innocent face. Not a gorm to be found.
In other news, we have our first quest: check the mail.
Our grand quest immediately runs into complications. I wondered before whether we’d ever get to see Papa Egbert. Perhaps the next pages will hold the answer?
Or perhaps not.
Ah yes. Housetrapped.
It seems the order of the day is further screwing around.
Screwing around, yes, but the flash is actually pretty neat, It seems to link back to other MSPaint Adventures. I wonder if those are worth checking out as well? For now I’ll just leave them be though.
This book is an affront to basic decency. Just look at that abomination of a color scheme! Also ‘practical’ is not a word that I normally associate with ‘japery’.
Foreshadowing? Come to think of it, the scale is probably wildly out of balance, but I’m surprised he can even lift this monster.
Wait. First of all, bully isn’t an adjective, but more importantly, one of the moods is palsy?? To copy paste, palsy is “complete or partial muscle paralysis of a body part, often accompanied by a loss of feeling and uncontrolled body movements such as shaking”. I’m really not sure I want to live in a world where that’s a common mood.
Expert level prank John. Well done.
He says this like everyone down to elementary schoolers goes around routinely allocating strife specibi. Which, come to think of it, might be true in this world.
Naturally.
I just need a moment to bask in the glory of this terminology. Okay moving along.
Wait.
Is that . . .
FancySantakind?
If this doesn’t come back later on I’m going to be highly upset.
I wonder if maybe it’s going to be extremely relevant? Call it a hunch.
That does seem like John. As I said in my last session, this inventory system seems pretty useful actually. I want one.
Oh hell yes.
Sidenote, but how exactly is Sburb pronounced? es-burb? or like ‘suburb’ but with the first vowel awkwardly missing?
The Bro behind the phrase “Brotel Rwanda” needs like eight Pulitzers. (Coolkid mentioned having an awesome Bro. Maybe this is his work? Probably not though, since he admitted Game Bro is trash and he doesn’t strike me as the type to voice anything but praise for his brother’s work.)
Little does John know that an artifact of such masterful brosmanship can only be destroyed by the most infirm of sick fires in which it was forged.
I’m going to end today’s session here because I feel like I’ve made a good amount of progress and I’d like to have the time and energy to get some writing practice in before the little death of sleep comes for me. All going according to plan, there should be more liveblogging on the morrow, but until then toodles!
#homestuck#mspadventures#homestuck liveblog#hsday3#brosmanship#on the origin of coolkids#lord of the bros#guttersnipe homestuck
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Do you have any tips for writing fanfics? Or writing in general?
I have a few, and I’m flattered af that you would ask me!
1. Just write. Seriously. Just write whatever you want to. You don’t have to post it or fix grammatical errors or any of that, just write. I spent a good chunk of four years just writing on paper or on my phone and only shared the fics with my friends. That got me used to the flow of writing and what to expect when I write and loosens you up. (Plus, my writing from when I first started to now is SO much better, and I still have a long way to go, which is okay!!! I’m proud of my progress and you should be too!)
2. Don’t be afraid to share your work and have someone critique it for you. Honestly my writing would be SO much better if I let someone do that, but I’m super insecure so I don’t. I encourage you to at LEAST share some of your writing with a friend or two and ask them if they have questions about it. That’s an easy way for them to bring up problems in your work that need to be looked at without insulting you, and it makes you feel better to explain your work and understand how the reader interprets your fic. ALSO!!!! I find that I ADORE when people ask me questions about what I’m writing because then I know people are interested and invested in my story! So it’s really a win-win!
3. After writing a one-shot or a chapter, don’t look at it for a few days. Become unfamiliar with it, so when you go back to edit, you read it as a READER not a writer. Sometimes what you try to convey doesn’t exactly come out on paper, and you don’t even notice it until later when you read it yourself. This is also the time I use to edit spelling mistakes and the like.
4. Embrace shitty fanfiction. The amount of fiction I have written is astounding (literally 200 unfinished fics on my flashdrive) and I can tell you only like five of those are even worth reading. Guess what? That’s still okay!!! Every time you write you improve! All of those crappy fanfics brought me to the point I’m at now! It’s really exactly like an artist drawing every day every year and gradually improving. Writing is an art form, after all.
5. Read!!! Read novels and comics and manga and and fanfiction written by thousands of authors from all different periods. Through this you’ll see different writing styles and themes and amazing characters and their unique personalities. One of my favorites to read is Water For Elephants. An amazingly descriptive novel that I aspire to obtain in my own writing.
6. Along with reading, analyze the crap outta whatever you read and even watch on tv! If you’re good at analyzing you’ll be good at writing. Note little things characters do. Watch how they speak to one another. For instance: Shawn Spencer from Psych. Shawn is a character notorious for being over the top and ridiculous and childish. Why does he act this way? It is revealed in multiple episodes that he’s ashamed of being smart and hides his intelligence with a ridiculous and flashy show of stupidity. Take Adrian Monk from Monk: since episode one they had him sleeping on the left side of the bed, leaving an empty space on the right, and never sleeps in the middle. Why? That’s where his wife used to sleep before she was killed by a car bomb. Characters have reason and motive behind everything they do just like real people.
7. Research! Very important. While writing for Guzma I had to do extensive research on many things. Such as: why someone would want to cut their thighs, chronic depression and other disorders, and the affects alcohol has on an alcoholic AND how it interferes with depression. Research also helps you avoid offensive stereotypes! Another way to do research besides google is speak to someone involved in what you’re writing. Ask if you can question an current/ex alcoholic about what it is like to have that addiction. Ask someone who is disabled how they take care of themselves and the terms for prosthetics/wheelchairs/etc. Make sure to ask if you CAN ask them a question first, though. Never assume that they are willing.
8. Get the app Dictionary.com. It’s a blessing bc not only is it a dictionary, but it’s also a thesaurus. It’s incredibly helpful.
9. If you have the time, take prompts! Tumblr is full of people eager for fanfic content and they’re always ready to give a prompt to those willing to write.
10. Give yourself time. If you get bored with what you’re writing, take a breather. Your writing suffers if you continue to write when you don’t want to and it takes all the fun out of it. Don’t force yourself.
11. Buy self help books! If you want to become a writer like me, this is something that should be done. Buy a book about how to create complex characters and dynamic dialogue, it will help you for years to come. If you are only writing for fun, however, you probably won’t want to shell out 15-20 bucks on a book about writing. So this one you can take or leave depending on your situation.
12. Plan out the plot. It really does help. I avoid doing that and it only causes me problems. I recently planned out 32 chapters and now I know exactly how I want Alone and Hunted to end! I don’t have to worry about whether or not the next chapter will fit along with the story, because everything is planned out for me.
Sorry this got long!!! These are only a few I could think of lol. I could honestly ramble on forever about this. Good luck to you!!!
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More books (and other things)!
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I’m selling things again. Physical goods of course. I tried to sell those really old books but selling things that don’t have bar codes is a taller order than I anticipated so I’m scaling back the age of the products back to something with bar codes and this time I have a bunch of children’s books.
Just want to reiterate. There is a standard fee for selling items on Amazon. It is 5 dollars. If I price anything lower than that I’m basically paying Amazon to get rid of it for me. That’s silly. I’d rather burn it or give it to a library than owe money giving an item away.
So the bottom line price for the books is 8 dollars. Some things will cost 10 but 8 is going to be a standard. I have a minor collection to sell. As a seller I am Aaron Lee Johnson 2nd (I’m not being ponce by the way I had to use my whole name otherwise Amazon would reflect it as someone else’s name) and if you are going to buy any of these items from me you have to buy it from that seller.
All right. Lets list the items. I’ll get my salesman pitch shtick going.
I've tried to sell this before but I’ll attempt to sell it again.
I have a plate for sale! “Tender Coaxing” Signs of love series Polar Bear Plate.
It is a decorative plate made in 1982 by Edwin Knowles. It’s a very cute plate. I think it would be just the thing for family home and at 10 dollars it’s a good deal. As a side note, the real life Polar Bears are doing just fine. The videos/ads where they’re seen on an ice floe without land or food to keep them alive makes it seem like they’re being screwed but um. It’s a lie.
I have the hardcover version of Middle School: How I Survived Bullies, Broccoli, and Snake Hill
It’s typically priced at 8.34 but I’m knocking that down to 8.00 dollars. It’s great deal. These books are timeless. I call them Super Fudge Books, because as far as I can remember these books are designed in a similar manner to Super Fudge and Beverly Clearly books (And yes, Super Fudge is made by Judy Blume).
I have a hard cover version of Wyatt Burp Rides Again (The Adventures of Jo Schmo)
I've never heard of this book before. It’s a short book so you reckon it’s not worth much but you’d be wrong! It’s roughly 10 dollars but we’re going to do you a favor and lower that price to 8 dollars instead! It’s in perfect condition and I’m giving this book away and I’m giving it away, because I think it’s worth it.
I have yet another hard cover book: This one is Middle School: Just My Rotten Luck by James Patterson
We can never have enough stories about misadventures in the school system. That’s because public education is absolutely horrible but at the very least the adversity it provides makes for fun stories and hey, you don’t exactly find a lot of childhood friends online do ya? (Do you?). This book is going for 11 bucks. Not a bad price for this book but I can do it one better. I’m selling it for 10 dollars! It’s in good condition. You’re going to like it!
This book here is Dork Diaries 7: Tales from a Not-So-Glam TV Star
I’m not familiar with the other 6 and I’m very familiar with the word dork. I don’t think my understanding of it is going to be pertinent though. I’m selling this book for 10 dollars and that is what it’s worth. You’ll buy it from me though, right?
I have The Invisible Library which was a book I bought for my sister for Christmas last year. I sure hope she read it. She does read, and I pride myself on finding books for her to read although I feel like I have more of an influence on what comics she reads than basic books. This book is worth 8 dollars and that’s what I’m selling it for.
Speaking of comics I have Caveboy Dave: More Scrawny Than Brawny for sale.
It’s a comic book, or a graphic novel (Comic Novel? Graphic Book?) or something. I actually looked through this a bit and it’s nice. If you liked The Croods, this should be right up your alley. In fact I’m so positive about this book that I’m charging slightly more than what’s worth. It’s being sold for 7 dollars. I’m bumping that up to 10.
Okay. I've given it some thought. Maybe that’s too much so I’ll just charge 8 dollars for it, you’re getting a good deal here so enjoy it!
Here’s a change of pace Maisto Special Edition Red Ferrari F50 1995 1:18 Scale
There are listings for this toy car that go as far as 90 dollars. That’s intense. It’s the mint condition price and it’s very expensive. I don't have a mint condition version of this product. it’s still in the box though and the box is not in tatters. The adhesive on the plastic cover has worn away. The item itself is still untouched by human hands.
Because of this it’s not in perfect condition of the item I’m not selling it as a collectible and I will instead sell it as a normal item that’s kind of rare. I’m charging 45 dollars for this!
This is the lowest price for this, You’ll be hard priced to find a better deal than this!
Here is the last item I have for sale. It’s a collection. I am selling a variety of Wimpy Kid Books. Virtually one of a kind sale because I made this listing from the ground up. I did that because it’s a specific grouping of books. You’ll get exactly. Long Haul The Last Straw (Hardbook version) The Third Wheel Dog Days Diary of a Wimpy Kid Double Down (Hardbook).
Buying these books separately will run you $53.63 but if you buy this collection from me you’ll only have to pay 35.00! When the Shipping is all said and done I’m not making a whole lot but I wanted to create a product that will be an affordable deal for the person who loves these books or wants to invest in giving them a read!
Buy it today! Please! Buy it!
All right. That’s all for now. I’m doomed to sell more things in the future. I have a lot of those plates I need to start getting out of the storage so people can buy them. Because you want plates right? Please tell me you want plates.
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So I finally made a list of all my gripes with X-Men Disassembled right now. I know -1% of my followers care about comics, much less events/arcs, but I’m pretty heated and wanted to vent.
The “plot” is just a bunch of cliche X-Men mashed together. You have a mutant cure, an evil kid from the future, Four Horsemen, Age of Apocalypse, Angel becoming Archangel, and other stories you heard dozens of times before.
At least the cure plot is almost completely forgotten about just as soon as it’s brought up.
The story’s 10 issues long. Even though we’re getting this story weekly instead of monthly, this makes the event/arc really long. Longer than it has to be, if I’m being honest.
And the events of this arc will spill into the next arc, and we’ll get a billion spin-off books to tell side stories. It just won’t end.
Hey, remember the poster they made advertising this event? It had about 52 different X-Men on it, and it looked like this was going to be a massive event with a lot of characters, just like Avengers: No Surrender.
Only about 20~ X-Men have appeared. (Oya’s not in the picture, but she does briefly appear.) The characters with orange rings are ones that appear, but do jack shit or just show up once.
Every issue is basically just Jean Grey, Psylocke, the four kids (but mostly Pixie, Armor and Glob), X-Man, and maybe Bishop. I’m being generous with some of these green rings.
Multiple Man barely counts. He was more of a red herring plot device, repeating his schtick from that horrifically bad Multiple Man solo.
(Speaking of - guess who’s taking over the flagship X-Men book after this event? But I guess it’s not fair to judge him on that book. I should also judge him on that mini-event nobody liked, or that mini-run on Astonishing nobody read.)
Angel turns evil, again. And then he becomes Archangel, again. He complains about existence, but then helps the X-Men against the Horsemen. His whole story, especially his turning into Archangel, was pointless.
Also, despite freeing him from X-Man’s control, Psylocke doesn’t try this on the other Horsemen.
I’m only giving Anole a green ring because they’re incorporating him into the cure plot for some reason.
I can’t even really count Polaris as important, since she was used all of twice, and one time was just to throw Laura.
The 8 billion spin-off books might focus on other X-Men at least? I know Dani is confirmed for one. I think Evan is in another. But the book that’s supposed to be focusing on the X-kids? It’s focused on fucking Glob.
I will say that I’m glad Trinary didn’t show up. She was a good idea, but holy shit did she become cringe-inducing once they brought in the internet stuff.
Laura/X-23, who is normally quiet and reserved, is written as quippy, energetic and one who makes silly faces. I guess the writers confused her with Honey Badger, her annoying meme goblin sidekick.
She also indirectly talks shit about the X-kids, despite being in the same grade as them, and all of them being students longer than her. Pre-school murder training be damned, they went through a lot of shit with her.
Also, the X-Men giving the X-kids shit jobs and not respecting them. Looks like this’ll be a plot point, where they learn that they’re wrong?
Nope! The kids were in the wrong and they not only don’t know shit about being X-Men, but they’ve also never experienced true loss and hardship.
Except the fact that they’ve been X-Men for years, on serious missions
And Pixie graduated and became a full X-Man, but I guess they retconned that out.
And we had several years’ worth of stories that contradict this lesson, including a book entirely about how the X-Men let them down, and how they had to grow up, fight like soldiers and try to survive after losing everyone and everything around them. A book that lasted 42 issues and five years, six if you count New Mutants?
Hey, remember Necrosha?
Hey, remember Nimrod?
Hey, remember the 42 dead kids?
Hey, remember when even more kids died immediately after?
Armor even brings up Magik as an example of how X-Men suck and just kind of leave people MIA. Pixie and Rockslide met Magik while they were all trapped in Limbo, and Pixie lost a piece of her soul because of it. Yeah, I think they know the score.
But yeah, no. They’re just little shits, I guess.
Kitty is quick to abandon them in a hellscape, too. Like she doesn’t even try to save them, and it’s up to Bishop to convince her she’s being an idiot. The kids were at least right about one thing: the X-Men don’t give a shit about helping their fallen.
But I guess we know why Julian’s not in this event; it’d be hard to tell the guy who has lost several friends and his hands fighting for the X-Men that he doesn’t know about suffering.
I did like Armor shit-talking Bishop for the Hope stuff, though.
But the whole adults vs kids stuff. This is, what, the fifth hero vs hero plot in an event? Civil War, Civil War II, Secret Empire, Infinity War (sort of?) At least they’re just opposed to each other, instead of fighting each other.
Speaking of Civil War, I have reason to bring up the 42+ dead kids again. Or hell, Annihilation. (This doesn’t have anything to do with this book, I just wanted to complain about that.)
There are three writers, and it becomes really obvious when Psylocke starts inserting “bloody” into every other sentence.
This isn’t a problem with the story, just a problem in general, but why are they still pushing Glob? Because he has a unique look? Like nobody likes him anymore. I want Beak. Preferably without Angel Salvatore, since she sucks and I hate her.
The kids are seemingly transported to the Age of Apocalypse timeline, but the TWIST is that they’re actually trapped in Legion’s mind. Except the twist was accidentally spoiled in the “previously on...“ page at the beginning of the book. Whoops!
Also also also, Glob nearly chokes/suffocates Rockslide. But I thought Rockslide doesn’t need to breathe? Pretty sure he was even out in space at one point. He doesn’t even need a body, technically, since he can just reform himself. I’d say that the writers used this as a subtle plot point that the timeline they’re in is fake, but that would require the writers to actually know about Rockslide.
I’d say that quality control isn’t doing their job, but it’s clear that they don’t exist anywhere across the line.
Either that, or the writers just have so many horrible ideas that they can only catch so much. I don’t hate the writers, I know they have quite a few good stories under their collective belt. But I’ve heard about writers going buck wild and needing to be reigned in.
EDIT: On top of everything, we’re 8 issues in and barely anything has happened. Like, stuff happened, but not much of it really mattered.
Also, super-powerful Legion and X-Man mind-fuse and become one. Okay, sure. What the fuck ever. Who fucking cares at this point?
At least fucking Quentin Quire isn’t in this event.
Or Jason Aaron. Holy shit, a flagship X-Men book under Jason Aaron sounds like the worst timeline. Good thing that never happened, right?
Fucking Wolverine and the X-Men though.
I know he has nothing to do with this event, but seriously, fuck Jason Aaron.
Fuck Quentin Quire, too.
Completely unrelated, but anyone else watching The Gifted? I want to know what that pop song was in the last episode.
I’m just hate-reading at this point. The hate gives me power. I have 0 hope for this X-Men relaunch, but I’m going to keep trying. There are so many characters I love and want to see again. I don’t even dislike Rosenberg, despite the shit-talking. And, like, at least it isn’t as bad as Jason Aaron’s take on Robbie Reyes.
But if I can say one thing to the three writers behind this horrible Frankenstein of bad ideas, it’s this: 42 dead kids I know it’s hard, trying to wrangle up characters with decades of history and trying to make a coherent, interesting story that also respects their characters. I know that sometimes, you have to use characters you don’t want to just because they’re popular (Jubilee) or being pushed (Glob.) On top of it all, you have three writers trying to work together, while also under management’s mandates and guidelines. I get all that, and I can sympathize. It doesn’t excuse X-Men Disassembled, but I can understand that you guys must have tried your best, given the circumstances. And I also know that, despite this little hiccup, you guys are all good writers.
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do you have any good fic recs?
On Fanfiction.net
My personal favorite author is paganpunk2. They write the most adorable batfam (though mostly Bruce and younger Dick). I would start with Firework which is a retelling of Dick’s first year at Wayne Manor and the rest are listed on her blog.
Where’s Robin and Without Me (one story told from two different perspectives, would start with WM) is also super cute. It’s by Glimare who also has written a ton of excellent one-shots. Robin is sent to an AU where there never were sidekicks. Also Hostages, Hero’s Debt and Necessary Lies are very enjoyable. Daddy, not Bats is interesting. It’s if Bruce adopted all his kids when they were younger and, to care for them, gave up being Batman.
Roots is the start of a series by TV Maniac 2. It’s how YJ Robin ended up with Batman. Yes, this story is 1st person from Dick’s POV but just stick with it, it’s worth it. First story in a while I stayed up late into the night to finish. Subsequent stories in the series are Hooked, Identity, Fragility and Loyalty is still ongoing.
Father by Lawless67 is really great showing each time the kids call Bruce dad for the first time
Also No Good Deed and Charades by Black Friar are particularly heart-wrenching. In NGD, Dick is taken from Bruce due to abuse accusations and the other Dick is kidnapped (again), really good dad bruce
Linchpin by Tiger Lily Roar is honestly amazing and read it and it’s short sequel Family Matters- A linchpin interlude. Like wow. I can’t even describe (Buried by her is also another intense Dick kidnapped story)
Pressing Matters, (More) Pressing matters by Sly are really cute just adopted Dick stories with a loving daddybats. I also like (Un)fortunate Son where Dick takes Dami and runs to safety before BI #8 instead of letting Bruce hand over Damian to Talia (sadly it’s unlikely to be finished)
WorldsGreatestDefective (Totally read I’ll Follow You Anywhere, The More Things Change and Dodge of my fav FF interpretation of tiny Jason)
Young Justice: Darkness Falls and Young Justice: Titans by Angelus-v1 is SUPER good. It’s a proposed season 3 and 4 of YJ and it’s very detailed plots involving so much from actual comics plus adding it’s own little fun things in. YJ:T is just finishing up and damn is it great.
Trepidation and Worth by sidekick heroisms are both very short, nice stories
FinalArc writes some really good interesting batfam with a really realistic, complex Bruce who tries and fails, a lot. Totally read Instinct, Citation, Bumper Stickers, Paved with Good Intentions, It’s the Thought That Counts is really super cute
How We Fall by Skylark Evanson is a LONG story of Robin coping if Bruce died sometime during YJ.
Officer Calling 1080 by A Tragic Galaxy is very fun where Robin gets pulled over for speeding by a naïve cop, Bruce is very protective.
Weezila does great stuff with Brothers, Show-off, Twenty Bucks, Flying Lessons also Three Little Birds is a great AU
midnightluck is the master of simply spoken but impactful one-shots. A Good Plan, A halo for your finger, Cause Walking Gets too Boring, dare not meet in dreams, just like bad wallpaper, The Circus Crime Protection Squad
aradian nights The Bond of Street Urchins, Where are all the goddamn knives, Fall and Fail, Stages of Deterioration is particularly devastating in which YJ-verse the Bats find Jason after he crawled out his grave and him trying to reintegrate into the family.
On AO3
- ANYTHING BY HEARTSLOGOS. I swear to Ford her stuff is just the absolute best and I’ve read everything so many times. SO mANy. Her Tim… is my Tim. favs: Clockwork, Executive Assistant to the Batman (READ THIS AU! HILARIOUS AND TOUCHING), Nanny, Awful Child, Drabble, Drabble, Things Left Unsaid, Think of the Cold, Our Silences are so Weighted, Quartet, Shutterbug and like… everything she has ever written, ever
- Really been enjoying Fracture by wintersnight which updated the other day I was soooo excited! (tw for light Jaydick and implied Jaydicktim) for Tim leaving and reintegrating into the Batfam post RR. Also in the Distractions collection she has a sad racture AU “No Home for Dead Birds” which is terrible in the best way.
- Bird by Bird, [Incident, Coincidence, Pattern], Five Times Jason Todd Saved His Brothers, and One Time They Saved Him by laceymcbain
- Slipcast by wisia is sad Tim :( and Class Differences for timkon
- Classics: One and Two by Protagonistically (The_Protagonist) is very good early Tim and Dick bonding and awkward Bruce trying to understand
- Support Systems, Make Believe Everything’s Alright, To be a Good Child, A Reason to Celebrate by keeptogethernow does very very good stuff
- Heart, Humble by Betty is GREAT Tim/Jack Drake bonding, it humanizes Jack Drake and makes me like him a bit more
- Life Lessons by Fire Dancer is watching child Tim develop his skillz
- Forgotten by Souliebird is bb Tim at Wayne Manor
- Try to Talk by drakesounds is Tim leaning on Bart and Kon for help
- Of Milkshakes and Marathons, Weighing Ones Worth by Rascal Joy (Dark Quill) for depressed Tim and Jay/Dami being good brothers (tw for suicide attempt in the second)
- Replace the Need with Love by Aviatricks (Also for Timkon, The Mystery of the Superboy Shirts which !!! was a birthday present from me and I remember this and I cry because I LOVE this story)
- For Timkon which is mostly focused on the realtionship not the smut- Trade in these wings for some wheels and your heartbeat in a thousand miles and Ink for Youself by victoria_p (musefool), Matters of the Heart and Reveries by DM (dragonmist30), TK! by Loud Lucy, Through Another Lens by animegoil (tw for slight unintended abuse that’s immeaditely shut down) and Gonna be a better one (A thousand miles to your door) by Traincat.
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Dropshipping success stories From Zero to $1M in 8 Months | Awesome Dropshipping Success Stories
During my years of doing dropshipping I’ve met countless people who wanted to make money online and build a lifestyle business where they can travel the world and work from their laptop. Of all of those people, I can count only a handful who really made it a reality. These people are self starters who actively search for other sources of income or who have turned selling on eBay into their main revenue source. But what about becoming a millionaire from ecommerce or making $30,000 a month? I know it sounds far fetched but in this post I will introduce you to three exceptional individuals who are the embodiment of dropshipping success stories.
Top Dropshipper #1: Irwin Dominguez
From zero to $1M+ in less than 12 months
Meet Irwin Dominguez from San Diego who within 8 months made $1,000,000 in profit as a dropshipper.
What drove Irwin to e-commerce entrepreneurship as a dropshipper ?
Dominguez happen to have a very good friend who was bringing in large amounts of cash on a monthly basis as a dropshipper. Irwin had no clue how to start dropshipping but he figured he would give it a try since he felt he had more to gain than to lose. He started by doing three simple things:
He learned about e-commerce using Google
He opened a Shopify account
He started using Oberlo which is a platform which helps you import dropshipped products into your ecommerce store and ship them directly to your customer
What was Irwin doing before dropshipping and how did he make his first sale ?
Before becoming a dropshipping success story, Dominguez was a local marketing consultant helping small businesses increase online traffic. The skills he acquired through this job no doubt helped him succeed in his new online venture.
He made his first sale using Facebook ads which he says ate into most of his profit but was well worth the investment in order to jumpstart his business. He swears by advertising on Facebook and says he owes most of his success to this form of marketing though he stresses that business owners must learn over time how to balance the cost of Facebook ads with profit margins.
Let’s talk numbers – what is Dominguez’s revenue per day
On his best day of e-commerce, Irwin pulled in a cool $30,000 and on average pulls in $10,000 a day though he says he is trying to increase these numbers. He talks about finding a niche product but that at some point you have tapped most of your target market so you need to find new products in the same niche (learn how we found the perfect niche) or move on to a different niche entirely.
What recommendations can you give to aspiring dropshippers ?
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Pro tip # 1: Before dealing in large quantities, validate your product idea by making a few sales before jumping in head first.
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Pro tip # 2: Be prepared when the floodgates open! Once you find a product that is super popular, make sure you have a mechanism in place to deal with the demand.
Top Dropshipper # 2: Kate
$32,000+ monthly revenue from her dropshipping business
Kate is not making millions like some other dropshippers but I decided to write about her since I think her business story and strategy contain great actionable insights for dropshippers across the board.
Who is kate and what is her background ?
Kate works for Aliexpress’s e-commerce department creating and testing promotion strategy for dropshipping stores. But kate knew nothing about dropshiping just three years ago when she started working for Aliexpress – before that she worked as a journalist and as a saleswoman at an offline gift store.
From “Account Suspension” to “eBay awards”, we’re sharing everything from our journey to $100k in monthly sales.
We’re learning a lot and so will you.
And don’t worry, we hate spam too! You can unsubscribe at anytime.
What type of ecommerce store did Kate create ?
Kate decided to create a dropshipping store using anime (roughly: Japanese comics) theme based on research she did which told her that there was a lot of interest in this niche. Her logic says that many dropshippers can make money by pooling different items from a variety of dropshippers based on a common theme and thus create a dedicated shopping base.
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Pro tip: Kate stresses that her idea was perfectly legal as anime creators do not aim to profit from merchandise as opposed to Disney for example who absolutely does aim to profit from paraphernalia – make sure your themed drop shipping store is not legally infringing on anyone’s copyrights.
What is your strategy for finding successful products to dropship ?
Offer a large variety – Kate says that even when she got to 100 products in her store’s inventory it wasn’t enough to quench fan’s thirst.
New products – You constantly need to add new products, kate says. Don’t just look at ‘Best Sellers’ on Aliexpress or eBay, also look at the ‘new arrivals’ and you will often find your next top selling products.
Duplicate and modify – Constantly check which products are selling best and which are not. Try and get rid of the items which are unpopular and import more items similar to the successful ones in order to generate more sales.
How do you learn about your target audience?
Google Analytics – Kate uses google analytics to find out crucial information about her customer base such as age, gender and country. Since she now knows that most of her customers are young men from developing countries she tries to keep prices low in order to move more merchandise.
Targeted Facebook advertising campaigns – Kate says Facebook is also an integral platform both for advertising and data collection. Facebook and google complete and complement each other.
Tell us some more about how you promote your dropshipping store on the internet ?
Instagram – The store’s Instagram account currently has 1,851,910 impressions, 81,000, 8,272 posts and has an ever growing fan base.
Kate used a variety of simple methods to achieve these astounding results including:
Writing an appealing bio
Analyzing the most popular hashtags
Experimenting with different post formats
Using Instagram Ads
2. Facebook – On Facebook the store is also very popular with 34,000+ followers – the main tactic is providing high quality content and attracting buyers and visitors vis-a-vis Facebook ads.
Content Marketing –
This includes writing original content or rewriting original content which is related to the product and publishing this on the store blog and on Facebook. This is a great way to engage people and get them interested in your product in an indirect way.
Google Shopping –
This is a semi – automated option and generates 300 sales on average per month. When someone searches for something related to the product, in this case anime, a picture of some products and prices appear in the google search.
How successful is your dropshipping business ?
The numbers talk for themselves – as of October 2017 Kate’s dropshipping business had 922 orders and $32,000:
Note the conversion rate which is 1.31%, this is a standard conversion rate for eCommerce sales so there’s a lot of opportunity to improve here, as you’ve probably read already, we increased our eBay conversion rate by 220% by optimizing our eBay listings.
Top Dropshipper # 3: Aloysius Chay and Galvin Bay
$60,000 a day within a year of starting their dropshipping store
How did these guys get started in dropshipping and what were they doing before ?
Before becoming successful dropshipping entrepreneurs, these guys were professional poker players in the Vegas like city of Macau. Like so many others, they had heard of friends who were making big bucks and wanted in on the action.
What challenges did these guys face ?
Towards the beginning they really struggled to find the correct product and the correct market. They failed at the beginning, trying to sell 20-30 different items. “Creativity and perseverance are key to success”, they both say.
They started selling Jewellery in June 2016 but did not end up even breaking even but they did learn many things such as the need to target specific audiences by country.
Chay and Galvin don’t really have a niche – they sell products that seem to be in demand or try selling products that are new on the market (you may remember the post we wrote about what to sell on eBay, these guys are implementing some of the best practices)
How did they promote and develop their business ?
These guys swear by Facebook ads and say that this was hands down the best marketing tool at their disposal. They say that it is super user friendly and any information or skills they lacked were easily enough found in online tutorials.
The pair also recommends networking and sitting down with friends and family who are involved in e-commerce in order to exchange and improve ideas (you’re welcome to read some of our eBay selling advice and how to boost eBay sales to get ideas for your eBay business).
What do you love about running a successful dropshipping company ?
Chay and Galvin love the most obvious and envious things – the income and the freedom. Now that they are totally independent they have a large source of income and they get to decide when they work and when they don’t. For most people in the workforce this sounds nothing short of a magical dream.
What is your highest sales record and what advice do you have for new entrepreneurs ?
Their record is 5 figures in one day and they hope to make it to six figures.
As far as advice for new entrepreneurs – always add new products (learn more about finding the best things to sell on eBay)! This will keep your business fresh and customers coming back. They say that the risks of adding new products pay off in the long run.
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My pro tip: This is a valuable advice for any online seller, it’s very important to understand that as a business owner you must be on your toes all the time, ready to make bug changes in order to grow your business. I always say that a business who’s not growing is essentially slowly dying and finding new products is a lifeline to business growth.
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work”, Thomas Edison once famously said. All in all there are many dropshipping success stories but also people who have failed. Failure lays the foundations for success and we can learn from both experiences. I hope this post gave you some insights into how to better start or run your dropshipping business – I would love to hear your stories and experiences with dropshipping below.
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Ian’s top ten best PSVR games of 2019 • Eurogamer.net
Welcome one and all to this year’s exciting instalment of the Ian’s VR Corner Top Ten list where I’ll be going over my ten favourite PSVR games of 2019. As per usual, the following list is completely my opinion and it only features games that I myself have played, so if I’ve missed out one of your favourites, chances are it’s either because I thought it was a bit bobbins, or that I just didn’t have time to give it a go. Either way, please do share the love for your favourite PSVR games of 2019 in the comments below and hopefully, together, we can inspire others to try them out too.
You can check out the video version of this list just below these words where you can watch footage of each game featured or, if reading is more your thing, you’ll find my entire top ten list just under that.
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10 – Ghost Giant
Anyone who has watched the Ghost Giant episode of Ian’s VR Corner will know that I had a fair few issues with the game’s motion controls, or more specifically, the fiddliness of picking things up that were just a little too far out of reach. Thankfully, there’s a lot more to Ghost Giant than just its control scheme and I was able to push past those faults and appreciate the emotionally charged story at its core.
In terms of production values, Ghost Giant is way up there and it actually shares a lot of similarities with Moss, one of my favourite games of 2018. The level of detail in Ghost Giant is incredible and the paper-craft dioramas that make up the levels look stunning in VR. It almost feels like you’re sat, centre stage in your very own Tim Burton movie, able to reach in and touch and interact with every inch of the world.
I didn’t just enjoy playing around and exploring these ultra detailed, model villages though, I was also enthralled by the life and personality of the characters that were expertly animated and voice acted. If you can look past the unwieldy interactions caused by the less than accurate Move controllers you’ll find a beating heart which is full of sweetness and sadness and there lies a story that will stick with you for a long, long time.
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9 – Everybody’s Golf VR
Someone famous once said that golf is a good walk spoiled, so it’s probably a good job then that Everybody’s Golf VR is a completely stationary experience. By cutting out all those boring strolls it means the game and its players can concentrate on pure, unadulterated virtual golfing across three gorgeous, 18 hole courses.
As the name would suggest, Everybody’s Golf is indeed for everybody. That means seasoned golfers will instantly be able to enjoy batting their balls around while newcomers can make use of an incredibly intuitive in-game interface to practice swings and judge the power and angle of each shot before going all in for a hole in one. The tracking of the Move controller is pretty much spot on with Everybody’s Golf VR and I didn’t notice any kind of drift or inaccuracy at all. Holding a single Move controller with two hands like you would the grip on a club feels just like you’re holding the real thing and this adds a lovely sense of immersion to the already relaxed vibe of the game.
While Everybody’s Golf VR is slightly watered down compared to other games from the series, especially when it comes to the lack of multiplayer, it does feel like a perfect fit for PSVR and it’s an ideal starting point for any golf enthusiasts out there who may be nervous about trying VR for the first time.
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8 – Falcon Age
It’s hard not to fall in love with Falcon Age after mere minutes of playing it and a lot of that has to do with your cute as hell companion, whom I decided to name, Pudding. Pudding is a falcon that you raise from a squeaking ball of feathers into a fully grown, mech murdering bird of prey and it’s pretty safe to say that caring for Pudding is probably the closest I’ve probably come to treating a VR animal as if it were a real-life living being.
Falcon Age is a rather compact open-world affair in which you stick it to awful robotic industrialists one act of sabotage and rebellion at a time. You head out into this world with a neat whip-baton thing in one hand and Pudding on your other, and you can send pudding to attack things, collect things, yank things about and then hold them up while you give them a good shoeing.
Just having Pudding there on your fist makes you think about it on a very emotional level. Seeing Pudding get hungry was enough to make me want to learn the rudiments of the cooking system, but pulling spikes out of her after a fight genuinely made me furious in a way a dog owner might be if someone mistreated their beloved pooch while they were out on a walk. This is a game about nurturing, about trust, about friendship and loyalty and about having an awesome Falcon friend who’ll do your bidding and smash evil robots for you. I love you, Pudding.
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7 – Sairento VR
You know that bit in The Matrix when Keanu Reeves goes, “I know Kung Fu!”? Well I had a few moments of realisation just like that during my first hands-on session with the PSVR port of Sairento VR. Don’t go into Sairento VR expecting to be a badass from the off though. There’s an incredibly steep learning curve here and there’s a lot of things you’ll need to learn in order to feel comfortable when navigating the levels.
In fact, this game should definitely be thought of as being on the extreme end of the comfort scale because it expects you to do double jumps, bounce off or run along walls and scale great heights. All whilst swinging swords, shooting guns and triggering super cool slow mo super powers. The first couple of levels really ease you into things, but by the third, the action is relentless and enemies come at you rapidly, shooting and hitting you from all angles.
This onslaught can be terribly frustrating at first but it forces you to learn quickly and it won’t be long before you’re chaining leaps and bounds together with slow-motion headshots and slick slide kills where you split opponents in two with your blade. When everything does start to click, the combat becomes so absorbing that it’s easy to forget about the normal world that exists outside of your headset. That’s why it’s well worth putting in the hours to practice your skills because when everything is going your way and you’re flowing through the levels, Sairento VR is one hell of an experience.
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6 – Spooky’s Jump Scare Mansion HD Renovation
Spooky’s Jump Scare Mansion HD Renovation is the first game in the world to have ever made me swear at a piece of toast and for that it instantly gets a thumbs up from me.
This VR remake of the cult classic PC horror game sees you trapped inside an ever changing maze comprised of 1000 different rooms, each one potentially home to a jump scare or two. Despite the budget look to the graphics and a rather slow start, I was surprised by just how scary Spooky’s Jump Scare Mansion could be. Being stalked through the rooms by some of the games more unsettling specimens would honestly be bad enough in the flat version of the game, but in VR it’s panic inducing as you can almost feel their physical presence gaining on you as you try to escape.
That feeling of being chased never gets old either, as the rooms, locations and your pursuers keep changing in unexpected and unpredictable ways. Basically it’s like dropping acid and going to a Halloween Horror Fright Night even at Thorpe Park, except you won’t need to drop acid and there won’t be a massive queue to get in. Now hurry up and release this in the EU please, Albino Moose Games!
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5 – Trover Saves the Universe
If you didn’t already know, Trover Saves the Universe is made by Squanch Games, a development studio run by Justin Roiland of Rick and Morty fame. So, if that kind of wacky, sweary, tasteless and self-referential sci-fi humour is your bag, Trover Saves the Universe will have you covered. In spit and poop, mainly…
Playing a bit like an Astrobot for adults, Trover Saves the Universe sees you galavanting around the galaxy, intruding on the often disgusting inhabitants of Alien worlds, all whilst trying to rescue your two pet dogs from the eye sockets of the evil Glorkon who is hell bent on destroying life as we know it.
There’s a fairly big game here and it basically includes everything you’d expect from a standard 3D platformer like combat, jumping, bounce pads, puzzles and item collecting. Everything in Trover has this dark and disgusting Roiland twist to it though and this leaves you constantly surprised and occasionally sickened by the events that occur. The bonkers scenarios and the imaginative characters that live within them are often either comically creepy or absurdly annoying and as such, fans of Rick and Morty are bound to be in VR heaven with Trover. For some, this constant barrage of weird humour may be a little too overwhelming and that’s totally understandable, but I played it through twice because I’m also super weird.
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4 – Borderlands 2 VR
Technically Borderlands 2 VR came out in 2018, but it appeared on the Playstation store so late in December that my Top Ten list for that year had already been published. In fact, I didn’t even feature it on Ian’s VR Corner until January when I came back from my Christmas holidays so its inclusion on this list totally counts. Totally.
Far from being a short spin-off experience, Borderlands 2 VR is a complete conversion of the flat game, featuring the full 25+ hour campaign. Plus, after the release of the free Bad Ass MegaFun DLC pack in September of this year, it also includes the four add on story missions and a bunch of upgrade packs too. That’s a lotta bang for your buck indeed!
I had a lot of fun when Borderlands 2 VR first came out, but when Aim controller support was added in another update, the game just got better. Being able to hold, admire and shoot any of the bazillion guns that are available to you in VR while holding the aim controller just adds to the immersion and it makes shooting all those Bullymongs and bandits feel super satisfying. Borderlands 2 VR is an incredibly well produced title that looks beautiful in 3D so it’s well worth revisiting if you’ve played the game before in flat version. If this is your first trip to Pandora however, this is a must buy that’ll keep you busy for ages. WUB, WUB, WUB!
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3 – Ace Combat 7
I’m absolutely terrified of flying in real life but flying in VR? Well that is a completely different story, especially when it comes to Ace Combat 7’s VR levels. There may only be three unique missions available in the VR portion of the game but when they’re this gorgeous, this exhilarating and this immersive, you’ll find plenty of excuses to replay them. I mean, I certainly did!
There’s just so much to love here, from the ultra detailed, interactive inheritors of the cockpits and the adrenaline pumping intensity of the VR dog-fights, through to the way that water droplets roll across your aircraft’s canopy as you leave thick cloud cover and burst out into the sunlight and thunder your way towards yours foes.
The sense of speed, power and of just ‘being there in the moment’ is truly exceptional here, so it’s a damn shame that Ace Combat 7’s biggest fault is that only a small portion of the game is playable in VR. Please, Bandai Namco, give us a full VR campaign and I promise you, I’ll buy it twice! Ace Combat 7 may have come out right at the start of 2019 but I still think about its VR missions regularly and I pull out my HOTAS and strap myself into my jumpseat whenever I get the chance.
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2 – No Man’s Sky Beyond
No Man’s Sky Beyond is almost the perfect VR game. It’s infinite, it’s incredibly immersive and if it wasn’t for the low resolution of the visuals, I could quite easily spend a large portion of my life just pootling around the galaxy digging through planets for valuable minerals like some kind of space age mole man.
The experience of exploring the universe in No Man’s Sky in VR is every bit as jaw dropping and massive as you could have hoped for but the ever present blur does kill the magnificence a bit. All those stunning vistas and the mysterious alien flora and fauna that you may remember from the flat version now look like indistinct smudges on the horizon and this works towards dampening that awesome sense of discovery that made the exploration so compelling.
Get past that though as you’ll find that the rest of the game is an absolute joy to play. The sense of scale in VR is amazing and the ability to fly around from planet to planet and galaxy to galaxy while being encased in the game is incomparable to anything else I’ve played in VR. This is a straight up, never-ending VR adventure and depending on your patience for the survival genre, you could easily end up spending countless hours exploring brand new world after brand new world. No Man’s Sky Beyond is an amazing achievement and I’d recommend it to anyone with a VR headset, if only to get a taste of what VR adventures could be like in the future, if the platform continues to grow and expand.
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1 – Blood and Truth
Right now, at the point of writing this feature, everyone in the world is getting excited about a brand new James Bond trailer. Everyone that is except me, because this year, thanks to Blood and Truth, I was James Bond.
The beauty of Blood and Truth though is that I wasn’t just James Bond, I was actually loads of things. I was a soldier in a warzone, a cockney gangster literally riding shotgun in a sports car and I was even some kind of parkour hitman, dodging machine gun fire from a helicopter as I legged it across the floors of a barely built block of flats before throwing myself through some plate glass windows as I shot enemies in the face during some glorious scenes of slow-motion gun-fu.
In Blood and Truth you are the star of your very own action movie, no more passively watching the action unfold on a flat screen, oh no. Here you’re right there in the thick of it, catching and throwing back live grenades, dual wielding pistols and generally living out all of those action movie fantasies that you never thought would come true. There’s an excellent supporting cast who’re brought to life by some top notch voice acting and motion capture and this serves to give you a real connection to the characters in some of the slower paced scenes, while each action set piece is just varied enough to make you constantly gasp out loud with the thrill of it all.
The gunplay is excellent too and while the on rails nature of the gameplay could be seen as a turn off for some, it keeps the pace rattling along and allows the developers to do some really clever and unexpected things with VR. If you own a PSVR you need this game and that’s the bloody truth of it.
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And that, my lovely friends, is that! Hopefully you enjoyed this look back at my favourite PSVR games of 2019 but if I did miss any of your favourites out, do remember to tell us about them in the comments! Before I wander off to snaffle some pre-Christmas mince pies, I’d just like to say a big thank you to each and everyone of you for the continued support you’ve been giving my VR coverage. Can you believe Ian’s VR Corner has been going for over a year and a half now? Crazy!
Here’s hoping things get even more exciting for VR in 2020, whether that’s for PSVR or for the wider range of headsets, because if 2019 has proven anything at all, it’s that VR just keeps getting bigger and better and it’s definitely not going to go away any time soon! If this list is the first you’ve seen of my VR coverage by the way, Ian’s VR Corner happens every Sunday on this channel so do pop on over and subscribe for more VR videos whenever they’re uploaded. Oh and of course, do have a lovely Christmas and a wonderful new year!
from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2019/12/ians-top-ten-best-psvr-games-of-2019-%e2%80%a2-eurogamer-net/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=ians-top-ten-best-psvr-games-of-2019-%25e2%2580%25a2-eurogamer-net
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