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mimi-cee-genshin · 2 years ago

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Friend-zoned? - Alhaitham x f!reader

Summary: How many Akademiya guys does it take to figure out whether or not you've friend-zoned Alhaitham? After discussing how strong he is, Kaveh, Cyno and Tighnari analyze his relationship with you. Things get interesting when you join their table.

Other info: fluff and humor :D, female reader, my extension of the conversation in Alhaitham's character demo because I loved the guys' interactions there so much

Words: 2.7k

*****

"Essentially, more time on contemplation, less time on execution," Alhaitham tells them. "Simple, isn't it?"

"... Not really," Tighnari and Cyno reply.

"Ugh, I knew I shouldn't have brought this up with you," Kaveh complains.

"I thought my answer was quite engrossing," Alhaitham says. He raises his hand. "Boss, this is good wine. I'll have the same please."

Kaveh swirls his cup. "Well, he has at least one weakness," he comments.

"Do tell," Cyno says.

"He's had the same crush for years," Kaveh tells them. "The guy's completely smitten."

"You can't be serious," says Cyno.

"Why is that so surprising?" Alhaitham says. "It makes less sense that I wouldn't be attracted to her."

"See what I mean?" says Kaveh. "You should see how he is around her. He practically treats her like a queen."

"I have a hard time believing that," Cyno says, crossing his arms.

"Stop exaggerating," Alhaitham tells Kaveh. "I just treat her the way she should be treated."

Kaveh only laughs at his answer.

"I thought you didn't like social interaction," says Cyno. "Or had any friends for that matter."

"It's not tiring to be around her," he says. "She's different."

"Of course she is," says Kaveh.

"Well this is interesting," says Tighnari. "What is she like?"

"We've known each other since we were kids. She was mature for her age. She did things like helping me resolve issues I had with others to keep the peace, making sure other kids didn't bother me while I was reading… Also, comforting me whenever I got discouraged…"

"You? Discouraged?" Kaveh scoffs.

"Yes? I'm only human you know," Alhaitham simply replies. "Anyway, you get the picture."

"That seems reasonable," says Tighnari.

"So it's one-sided?" Cyno asks. "As far as I can tell, you're still single."

"No," says Alhaitham, crossing his arms. "It's not one-sided."

"You're kidding me, right?" Kaveh says. "Are we even talking about the same person?"

Tighnari raises a brow.

"Every time she introduces him to another woman, she's a little too obvious with sharing why they'd be good for Alhaitham," Kaveh explains, "as if she's trying to sell them off to him."

"Don't be so dramatic," Alhaitham says. "She's not selling anyone."

"If that's the case, then why are you sure she likes you?" asks Cyno.

"Well for one, she comes by often to check how I'm doing."

"Perhaps she simply thinks you're incompetent at your job," Kaveh chides.

"Two," he continues, ignoring him. "She's always willing to hear about the latest book I'm reading, no matter how boring others think of it."

"Hmm…" Tighnari mumbles. "I can understand that."

"And three…" Alhaitham puts down his cup. "Whenever she reaches out for my hand, like when she wants to comfort me, she stops short of actually holding it."

"She does?" asks Kaveh.

"Interesting. So it seems that while she does display some sort of affection for you," says Tighnari, "perhaps she just didn't want you to get the wrong idea."

"So you're doubting my conclusion?"

"I'm simply saying it's difficult to judge based on the evidence you've provided. We may need to observe the two of you for ourselves."

Alhaitham sighs. This isn't going anywhere.

"Does she have any reason to not want to date you?" Cyno asks. "I wouldn't be surprised if you were overly critical of her, commenting on her every action."

"I give her nothing but compliments. She knows I think very highly of her."

"Huh," Tighnari says. "That's quite unexpected."

"I've been telling you guys," Kaveh says, "but he's really something else around her."

"Is she… actually older than you by any chance?" asks Tighnari.

"She is."

"Hmm… Well this changes things. Perhaps, she still sees you as a kid and is simply just doting on you."

Kaveh turns to Alhaitham, eagerly waiting for his reply.

Alhaitham clears his throat. "She's less than a couple of years older than me. It's not a big deal."

"Just admit that you're friend-zoned," says Kaveh. "Who'd treat their love interest like a kid?"

"I'm not so sure…" Cyno says.

Both Kaveh and Tighnari raise a brow.

"I think that Alhaitham has a clearer picture and can judge more accurately than any of us. They've known each other for long enough."

"It's just his wishful thinking on his part," says Kaveh. "Who wouldn't want to read into their crush's actions?"

"I agree to an extent," says Tighnari, "but perhaps we're missing some crucial information here. We don't know how well Alhaitham can judge a person's actions when romantic feelings are involved."

"I'm thinking quite clearly, thanks," Alhaitham says.

"This is why you aren't getting anywhere," Kaveh scolds him. "You're assuming she has feelings for you when she doesn't. You still need to win her over."

"Then what do you suggest I do?" Alhaitham crosses his arms.

"Ha. As if I'd help you. She could do way better than you anyway."

Alhaitham groans. Why is he even part of this conversation?

"Well, have you ever told her how you felt?" asks Cyno.

"Of course," replies Alhaitham. "I'm pretty obvious about it."

"For someone as reserved as you, I highly doubt that," Cyno adds.

"I wrote her a letter, eloquently expressing my love for her."

"Pfft. What?" Kaveh snorts.

Tighnari stares in disbelief. "Oh. I get it. You did that when you were children."

"I'm referring to the one I gave her yesterday."

"Pfft."

"That's… pretty obvious," Tighnari adds.

"I bet it was more of an essay than a love letter," Kaveh says with a smirk.

"Well, in that case, she either doesn't like you," says Tighnari, "or there's something that prevents her from admitting her feelings."

"Perhaps she's intimidated by your position," suggests Cyno.

"It's unlike her to care about those things," Alhaitham says. "She even treats me like a kid at times."

"So you do admit she just thinks of you as a kid," Kaveh says.

Alhaitham doesn't answer.

"Honestly, this case is closed," Kaveh continues. "There's nothing more to it."

"Hmm... Have you tried to make her jealous?" asks Cyno.

"You're still not convinced?" Kaveh is surprised at him.

"Knowing the result of that would likely draw us closer to a conclusion," Tighnari adds.

"Why would I purposely try to hurt her?" asks Alhaitham.

They exchange glances. Alhaitham still had the ability to make them go speechless with his matter-of-fact tone.

"Well, he's definitely serious about her," says Cyno.

"I told you," Kaveh says. "Seems like she's the only person he'd open up to as well."

"Of course she is," Alhaitham replies.

"I wonder…" says Tighnari. "Has she ever shared her own struggles with you?"

"Why would that be a factor?"

"Well, that would display how comfortable she is around you."

"Hmm… Not bad…" Alhaitham seems to agree with his line of reasoning.

He goes quiet and uncomfortably so because the other three exchange awkward glances at each other in the meantime.

"Well?" Cyno breaks the silence.

"You may be right," Alhaitham tells Tighnari with a sigh. "But that certainly raises more questions."

"Can we just start playing Genius Invokation TCG?" asks Kaveh. "We just keep going in circles with this topic."

"So you guys did just drag me out to play cards," says Alhaitham.

"It would be interesting to meet her," says Tighnari. "It's gotten me curious."

"Same here," says Cyno.

Kaveh looks up at the tavern entrance. "Huh? She's actually here."

Alhaitham's eyes flicker open for a brief moment. "Nice try. I'm not falling for that."

"I didn't expect to see you here, Alhaitham," you say, ruffling his hair.

He freezes and the three of them take a closer look at his face.

"I never expected him to have that kind of expression," whispers Tighnari.

"Me neither," Cyno agrees.

Alhaitham clears his throat. "They simply invited me here for some cards," he tells you. "Nothing more."

"Can I join?" you ask.

Without question, Alhaitham gets up from his chair. He holds the back of his seat and slides it out, gesturing for you to take it.

Cyno and Tighnari widen their eyes.

"Is it just me or did that feel kind of odd?" says Tighnari.

"Coming from him? You're not wrong there," adds Cyno.

You hesitate for a moment before you accept his kindness and take his seat. He stands next to you, waiting for the other guys to start preparing the game.

The two onlookers feel slightly uncomfortable for some reason while Kaveh tells them another round of 'I-told-you-so's. There isn't anything out of the ordinary as you all take your turns playing each other. Cyno is intense as usual, not just with his tactics but also with how he approaches the battle like an interrogation. Tighnari was calm and collected even under pressure, and Kaveh spoke his mind with every move, regardless of whether it's his or his opponent's. But having you there with Alhaitham is… strange.

Nothing really happens of significance. The two of you treat each other well and with respect. Just having Alhaitham being a complete gentleman around you is unnerving for the rest of them. Curt responses and sarcastic remarks are absent. He's completely agreeable with you and his usual temper isn't there either. Everyone plays the game in peace.

"You should save that card for later," Alhaitham tells you. "He can't do anything for the rest of the round anyway."

"Hmm… I'm not quite sure if that's what I want to do yet," you respond.

"Alright," he says. "You should do what you think is best."

"This guy…" Kaveh turns to you. "How do you get him to be like that? If it were any of us, he would've scolded us with a lengthy explanation about how we'd lose if we didn't follow his exact instructions."

"What? She can think for herself."

"And none of us can't?"

"I'm already familiar with how the three of you play and where you go wrong. I want to see if she does anything differently."

"It seems that he really does only compliment you, huh?" Tighnari tells you.

"Why would I do otherwise?" Alhaitham states.

His straightforward remark stuns them once again.

"Okay, we get it," says Kaveh. "We all know about your huge crush on her."

"Seems like you can't say anything bad about her even if you try," Cyno comments.

"Of course I can."

"You can?" you ask.

The whole table looks at you funny. You fiddle with the cards in your hand, pretending you weren't shocked for a split second.

"Interesting," says Cyno.

Alhaitham crosses his arms. "What is it?"

"I'm keeping my observations to myself for now."

Alhaitham raises a brow, but lets it go for the meantime.

A few rounds go by and you help set up for the next. When Alhaitham picks up a die for you from the floor, your hand brushes against his and the die falls off the table once more.

"What's wrong?" Alhaitham asks as he picks up the die again. "You're not usually this clumsy."

"I don't think there's anything wrong with me," you say.

He takes a closer look at you and you avoid his eyes. "Alright," he says. "You still ready to play?"

"I'll need to head out soon," Tighnari says. "It's my turn to be on patrol for tonight."

"Hold on," Cyno says, placing his cards on the table. "One last round. I'll be your opponent this time," he tells you.

You finish setting up the game and test your skills against Cyno. He certainly doesn't make it easy for you. You fall behind pretty quickly, but at least he's not as intimidating as when he played with some of the others.

"So," Cyno says, "what do you think of Alhaitham?"

Your eyes widen at his sudden question.

"You're straight up asking her?" says Kaveh.

"Why not?"

"I guess he has a point," says Tighnari.

They turn their attention to you to see what you'd say.

"Well…" you say, "he's very intelligent and talented."

"No, not what everyone else says," says Cyno. "What you think."

"What do you think you're doing?" asks Alhaitham. "Are you interrogating her right now?"

"Just let her answer the question."

"Well…" you say, "he's nice? And sweet?"

Cyno raises a brow.

"He's cute?"

"Pfft." Kaveh holds in his laughter.

Cyno ignores him and presses the question.

"I don't know how to respond," you tell him. "We've known each other for so long I can't just sum it up in a sentence."

"Alright. I'll get straight to the point," says Cyno. "What do you think of Alhaitham's feelings for you?"

"I think he should get to know other people… and try dating someone else?"

"See?" says Kaveh.

"I've already told you I'm not interested in anyone else," Alhaitham says.

"No, you should listen to her answer," Cyno tells him. "She's not lying."

"What?" Alhaitham widens his eyes.

"I'm not done yet," says Cyno. "There's more." He turns to you. "How serious do you think Alhaitham is about you?"

"He's definitely sincere."

"I'm pretty sure that was obvious," says Tighnari.

"But you don't take his feelings seriously," Cyno tells you.

"It's not that. It's just…"

"You don't?" asks Alhaitham.

"Alright. It's your turn from here," Cyno tells him.

"But I thought I was clear," Alhaitham tells you.

"You were."

"Apparently not clear enough."

"Look. You used to follow me around like a duckling whenever you weren't reading a book," you tell him. "How was I supposed to take your crush on me seriously?"

"It's been more than a decade since then."

"I... Okay, fair enough," you concede. "But it would disappear once you learned I didn't live up to your expectations."

"What expectations?" Alhaitham raises his brow.

"I don't know. That I'm this perfect woman that you've been pining for more than half your life. You'd know I'm not so great if you'd actually try liking someone else."

"Is that what you've been telling yourself?"

"You never say anything bad about me."

"Why would I want to talk about your flaws? Especially when I've been trying to win you over," he says. "Besides, aren't they obvious to you?"

"What?" You're genuinely surprised. "Like what?"

"Like how stupid you're being right now."

You freeze.

"Besides, I've been around you long enough," Alhaitham continues. "There's plenty I don't like. Like the way you cut me off at times–"

"What?"

"–or your atrocious style–"

"Okay, that one hurt a bit–"

"–or how stupid do you have to be to keep asking Kaveh for money –"

"Alright. I get it."

"–or that time you–"

"Okay! I get it! You like me!"

Kaveh looks at you as if you've grown another head. "How did you come to that conclusion? Are we even listening to the same conversation?"

"I think she's finally realized that his feelings were deeper than she initially thought," says Tighnari. "Especially since she knows that Alhaitham is still objective with her and not blinded with infatuation."

"That's right," Cyno says. "She's been the exception to his behavior for a long time. It makes sense she would think his judgment would be clouded with the information she had."

You hide your face from them. It's embarrassing how they read you like a book once your guard was down.

"I didn't expect the solution to be so simple," Alhaitham says.

He slips his hand into yours and you let out a little squeak. "You've also been wanting to hold my hand for some time haven't you?"

"Ugh. You're all smug now because you know that I return your feelings."

"I also don't like how you rearranged my bookcase."

"You can stop now."

"I think it's time for us to go," says Cyno.

"But we haven't finished our match yet," you tell him.

"I'll just forfeit this one."

"I'm with you on that," says Kaveh. "Anything before they start being gross with each other."

"I guess this is a good time for me to head out as well," says Tighnari.

The two of you are suddenly left alone at the table with a bunch of dice in front of you.

"Well, that's one way to win a match," Alhaitham tells you. "I'd say it's pretty ingenious actually."

You simply groan. You know what's coming.

"Do you want me to help you win every time?"

"Please don't."

*****

I hope you liked it. :)

This is one of those fics I wish had inline commenting like on Wattpad. I would've loved to see how everyone reacted at certain parts in real time but unfortunately Tumblr doesn't have that.

Anyway, you can find links to my masterlist and taglist on my pinned post if you want to check out more of my writing.

#alhaitham x reader #alhaitham scenarios #alhaitham fluff #alhaitham fanfic #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact scenarios #genshin scenarios #genshin x reader #genshin impact fluff #genshin impact fanfics #genshin fluff #cyno #tighnari #kaveh

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fizzie-frog · 2 months ago

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I don't even know where to start, sorry, buuut Ghostfuckers spoilers ahead.

"Who needs you anyway?!"

Blitz's avoidant coping once more. I am guilty of avoidant behaviour just like Blitz and while it technically eases stuff, it becomes too much when there's so many problems you ignore and they pile up. This behaviour also makes it hard for someone to be vulnerable, which obviously is the case for Blitz, too. It hurts to be vulnerable. We avoid being vulnerable, because we avoid being hurt.

So instead of trying to talk through with Millie, Blitz opts for being avoidant.

The imagery in this episode is fucking amazing.

Now this is just cruel. :(

She's so pretty, omg...

Once again, the imagery is amazing. It's so beautiful, but so tragic. Fucking horrible in the best way. The torment Blitz is going through of that fateful day.

He's breaking down... Crying in front of someone else; this man is avoidant, as stated before, so if he could help he would NOT do this. He's really tormented by his memories.

They're both so badass damn.

"You don't hate me?" I'm disintegrating rn. Help me.

How am I supposed not to sob my eyes out when I see that face?! Taking mom's accessory piece back.

Holding hands!!! Please, yes!!!

"You've always been so unbothered by everything, almost bulletproof"

That's avoidance, baby! Blitz needs to stop being relatable...

But why-

This absolute POS beating up his already injured son has me fucked up!!! I don't doubt Cash probably beat Blitz many times before, but doing so after being burnt too is a special kind of fucked up! He's always been horrible, and I'm sure this is where Fizz too got his issues (with perfectionism that is) and made him an easy target for Mammon. This mdf really fucked everyone over! Fk him!

And then separating them when they both needed each other so much! Blitz and Fizz needed each other more than ever in that moment, and yet that POS preferred to have them suffer! I'm riled up honestly, we've never seen much of this mf but he's managed to make himself insufferable with just a few short scenes! He's horrible and if he's not dead then I wish him the worst.

I miss my baby-

Being forced to watch all this... Fuuuuck.

He's so terrified of losing Millie too! Fuck!

"Blitz can handle this!" Fuck yeah girl, call that mf's bluff.

"So I'm your best friend, huh?" He's so surprised about that I can't.

"I've never had a real friend that I didn't wanna fuck..."

...Does that include Fizz? Hm?

This episode was fucking beautiful.

#helluva boss #Blitzo #Millie #Moxxie #Loona #Fizzarolli #fizz #cash buckzo #Stolas #Ghostfuckers #Ghostfuckers spoilers

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pirateshelly · 4 months ago

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One thing that really fascinates me about interview with the vampire (the show) is this sort of tension between power and powerlessness in all of the characters. Because it doesn't present becoming a vampire as something that just gives you power and magically makes you completely detached from all human concerns and struggles.

And that seems to be something Lestat does very much want to believe, and he's in enough of a position of privilege that he's able to convince himself it's true, and it's a fundamental area where he just cannot understand Louis because Louis CAN'T pretend even if he wants to. (And of course Lestat cannot ACTUALLY separate himself from "human troubles" the way he likes to think he can, he just has an easier time pretending than most). Because as much as becoming a vampire grants these characters supernatural power it doesn't just magically take away the very tangible human ways that they were previously vulnerable or powerless.

Becoming a vampire doesn't negate Louis' struggles with racism; in some ways it amplifies them with how he is alienated from his own family and community; his closest connection becomes Lestat. He loses his economic independence and becomes socially dependent on Lestat in a way he wasn't to anyone as a human because in some ways becoming a vampire made him MORE vulnerable, despite granting him physical strength/speed/etc. The promise of freedom in vampirism Lestat presents to Louis (that I do think he does genuinely mean, but "freedom" means very different things to Louis than it does to Lestat) is never fulfilled.

Likewise Claudia learns the hard way with Bruce and later with the coven that she may be a vampire but the world still looks at her and sees a vulnerable young black girl and that will always put her in danger.

Claudia rescues Madeleine then turns her into a vampire, but rather than protect her from future harm the "crime" of turning her becomes the very thing that gets her killed by yet another angry mob.

And 514 years as a vampire will never be enough for Armand to truly trust or believe in his own power. Because the first 200 or so years of his life he was literally never once allowed any agency at all over his own identity or his own body (child slave sold to a brothel, sold to an abusive master, captured and violently indoctrinated into a vampire cult for centuries). No amount of material strength and power is going to undo the psychological effects of that. (And I know some people like to read his frequently passive demeanor as simply manipulation and a way of catching people off guard (because how could someone so old and powerful possibly feel a genuine sense of fear/vulnerability/etc 🙄) but to me that's an incredibly disingenuous reading of him. But that's a different rant for another time!). Being a vampire does not save him from being horrifically abused, nor does it save him from the lasting emotional effects of that abuse.

And I think there's something interesting to be said about the way that, in order to survive safely, they have to feed on the most vulnerable members of society (people undesirable and therefore least likely to arouse suspicion) in order to go unnoticed. If they want to live they have to prey on those vulnerable in possibly the same ways they themselves once were (and in many ways still are).

There's a frequent argument I dislike that we shouldn't be viewing any of these characters through too human of a lense because they're literal monsters (to be honest it's an argument I see most often made when people simply don't want to talk about the show's complex depiction of racism/misogyny/abuse/etc and used to dismiss those as issues "too human" to be relevant to a story about a bunch of monsters with a supposedly alien sense of morality), but I think the show itself makes a huge argument that for these characters there is no escaping or separating themselves from the very human struggles and vulnerabilities that marked them before they ever became vampires. It's like a sort deconstructed power fantasy.

#interview with the vampire #louis de pointe du lac #armand iwtv #claudia iwtv #lestat de lioncourt #madeleine eparvier

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michelle-is-writing · 6 months ago

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Interview, Matthew Gray Gubler

He's so goofy, I love him

Word Count: 2.1k~

(C/n) : Character name for the show

I think even after all the years of doing acting, I will never be able to feel completely comfortable in an interview. Over time, it's gotten easier, but the lingering feeling of nervousness still creeps up into me. I always worry I'll say something that can be taken out of context, or I'll blurt out something I wasn't supposed to reveal just yet. However, if I'm with friends or co-workers during an interview, the anxiety isn't so prevalent.

Thankfully, right now, I'm in one of the rooms on set with four of my closest friends as a reporter from a nearby magazine publishing company interviews us. Kirsten, A.J., and Shamar sit along the largest sofa while Matthew and I share the loveseat in the room. It's fitting, actually.

Over time, Matthew and I have formed a relationship with each other outside of filming Criminal Minds. It wasn't planned, of course. We met on set knowing our characters would soon be forming a romantic relationship, and so, we started a friendship to better portray the chemistry on set. However, that chemistry went farther than I could've expected in such a short time, and now we sit as two lovers who can't reveal themselves to the world just yet.

In the show, my character, (C/n), and Spencer still haven't gotten together. They're perfect for each other, my character having been written specifically for Spencer's character, but they have issues like any other two people trying to get together. It's lead to a lot of ups and downs with many fans going online to tell us to just kiss already. Luckily for them, the next episode that's next to come finally breaks through that relationship barrier and our characters get together. Because of this, the producer has told us that it was alright Matthew and I could be together off-screen - however, we must keep our relationship secret and hidden away from the public to avoid any spoilers about the episode being released.

Due to the pressure of trying not to do any of the things I would usually do with Matthew, I'm a bit scared of this interview. I know the interviewer is going to ask us questions about our ever growing on-show relationship - that's a definite. With the increasing romantic tension between our two characters, I don't even think she has to ask any questions to get the answer she wants. It's happening, and it's obvious.

Once the interviewer enters the room, she introduces herself as Lacey and greets us all with a welcoming smile. Sitting down in the only arm chair in the room, she starts off by talking about the recent season to the camera while other cameras pan around to catch video of us all. With all of us being watched and recorded, Matthew waits until the cameras are pointing away from us before sliding his hand discreetly over to mine and linking our pinkies together. The simple action, makes me a bit calmer as a smile soon makes its way to my lips.

"So, JJ And Will," The interviewer starts, facing A.J. with the same smile as before, her arm draped against the arm rest while her leg is crossed over the other. "Are they thinking about having any more kids after this recent one? Maybe another boy, or a girl for change?"

At the question, A.J. smiles with a small laugh. "I think for now, Henry and Michael are enough for Jennifer," She explains, folding her hands together and placing them in her lap. "Plus, I think Mekhai and Phoenix are enough for me at the moment too," A.J. adds, causing all to laugh with her. The boys are wonderful, but with Phoenix barely six months old at the moment, I can understand why she would be apprehensive over thinking about another baby so soon.

"They are adorable kids, A.J.," Lacy tells her, earning a warm 'thank you' back. Turning toward Kirsten and Shemar, Lacey asks them her next question. "What about your characters?" She asks, "Are there anymore developing things to soon come along?"

"Just the same ol' incessant flirting from this old woman," Shemar jokes, earning a slap to his arm from Kirsten much to our amusement. However, Shemar quickly earns his friendship back from Kirsten with a hug as she struggles to keep her angry face. "But it's the flirting that I love! I love it! I'm glad it's incessant!" He further clarifies, taking Kirsten in his arms and swaying her as she laughs at him.

With that, our laughter grows until finally quieting down as Kirsten is back to wrapping her arms around Shemar's neck in a non-threatening gesture. This time, the interviewer turns toward Matthew and me with a smirk on her lips, his hand having already left mine moments ago as we felt the questions coming.

"Now," Lacey begins, her voice slow and calculated. I can't help but feel a bit anxious under her unmoving stare. "We have seen the relationship between (C/n) and Spencer grow and have breakthroughs on-screen, but, my question is..." She then pauses, her smirk turning into a grin. "What all do you have to say about yours and Matthew's relationship off-screen?"

Her question takes me by surprise. All of the questions we've been asked before were centered around the relationship between mine and Matthew's characters - never are they about me and Matthew in real life. We always chalked it up to the fact that we make sure we're careful in not revealing that we do have a relationship, but maybe Lacey just kind of sensed it. Although, how could she not?

"Oh, well," I start, looking over at Matthew as he smiles at me. To the others, it's just a plain, nonchalant smile, but to me, I can see the corner of his lips turning up into a smirk. "Our relationship is nothing more than friends," I lie, my voice calm as I continue lightly grinning. "We play around and joke around with each other constantly. We're very close," I add, being truthful for once. I know that Matthew desperately wants to stop hiding our relationship from the public, as do I, but we can't. At least, not for another week.

Lacey hums a response with the smirk back on her lips. "So, Matthew's arm around your shoulder was just a friend thing?" She can't help but ask.

"Okay, so, we're best friends!" I exclaim, rolling my eyes before letting out a small laugh. "Two friends can put their arms around each other without it meaning anything else. Right, Shemar?" I add, hearing the man in question agree with a 'I know that's right'. Meanwhile, Matthew has his own way of dealing with the unwanted questions.

"Whoah!" Matthew states, leaning back with a blank look, his hands help up in surprise. "Did you just friendzone me, babe?" He asks in a ridiculous voice, making me stifle a laugh. He's so goofy, but I guess he's trying to help me play it off all the while calming me down too. Like anything else he does for me, he's doing it successfully.

"You're lucky I even said 'best friend,' buddy," I add, crossing my arms with a smirk as I lean back against the couch rather than Matthew's arm like before. Meanwhile, Matthew just stares at me with his mouth agape, trying not to laugh at my words.

"Bu-buddy?!" He questions, purposely stuttering the word for a dramatic effect. "My heart!" He shouts, slapping a hand to his chest. This time, everyone begins laughing at our exchange as we smile at each other and slowly settle back down.

Thankfully, realizing that she won't get the answer she was wanting, Lacey doesn't question mine and Matthew's relationship again, nor does she ask anything more about Spencer and (C/n)'s growing relationship either. In fact, her attention is so far away from me and Matthew at this point that she doesn't even notice our new position with my back against Matthew's chest and his arm lazily strewn across my lap. Any other time, this wouldn't be happening, but with us establishing that we're just "friends" like Shemar and Kristen (funny enough, the only two that actually do know about our relationship), I feel as if we're in the clear.

After the interview is over and we're all released to head back to our dressing rooms, I make my way to mine with the intention of taking my makeup off before heading home and taking a nap. Of course, when I say 'home,' I mean mine and Matthew's apartment. Unfortunately, it's yet another thing we have to hide from everyone else.

Just as I toss my used makeup wipe into the trash bin, I hear my dressing room door open behind me before shortly closing afterward with a click. Turning around to see who walked in, I'm greeted by the person whom I want to see the most, and we can't help but smile at each other as soon as our eyes meet. Barely a few seconds pass before Matthew's arms are around me and my lips are on top of his.

Despite our touches being soft and sweet, they soon turn into something more as I find myself pressed against my dressing room counter with Matthew in between my legs and his hands planted firmly on my waist. "Matthew," I murmur in between kisses as his lips move down to my jaw. I know that if we don't stop now, there will be no stopping at all.

"Matthew, we can't," I whisper, pulling myself back to look at him. Staring back at me with lust blown eyes, I watch as he tries to catch his breath while I do the same. Having to hide our relationship everywhere we go builds up a certain passion that sometimes comes out in situations like now. Although, it's usually at home and not where practically anyone can catch us. "Not here."

"Why? No one's going to hear us," He quickly points out, shrugging as if it were nothing. Diving back into my neck, Matthew presses his lips onto the skin of my collarbone, prompting me to move a hand to his head and tug his hair back. Thankfully, this brings a halt to his actions, and instead of crying out in pain, Matthew jerks his head back into my hand and sighs through his nose, smirking. "Unless you keep that up."

Resisting the urge to laugh, I shake my head at him. "That's what I'm saying!" I almost exclaim, moving my hands to the sides of his smiling face. "Besides, we haven't come out as official yet. We were told to wait until next week's episode that way we don't give away our character's relationship at the same time," I remind him, feeling my heart slowly break as his smile falters.

Knowing that I'm right, Matthew sighs before laying his head against my chest in defeat. "I know, but I'm tired of waiting," He murmurs, his voice gentle and almost in-audible. Out of the two of us, I think Matthew's the one that this affects the most.

"Me too," I agree, my hand that had previously pulled at his hair now soothingly combing through the longer locks. "But, it's just another week, just one more," I point out, reminding us both that we don't have to wait that long anymore. "And then we can finally kiss and hold hands and hug without having a finger waved at us."

Nodding with a chuckle, Matthew continues resting against my chest as I massage his scalp. Although, a flip is switched within a matter of seconds and he's back to smirking. "You know, we could always just give them a sneak peek, nothing more," He suggests, turning his head to nuzzle further into the exposed skin from my v-neck blouse.

"Matthew, you are an animal!" I quietly exclaim, laughing as I have to once again push him away. With him grinning playfully, I move to stand back up in front of him, a similar grin making its way onto my face before I lean up and press my lips to his in a soft, but quick kiss. "I do love you though."

Smiling at my comment, Matthew tightens his arms around me and holds me close, my face now pressed into his chest for a change. "I love you too, (Y/n)," He murmurs, lowering his head as I feel him press a kiss to my hair. One more week is all we have to wait before revealing anything, and honestly, I don't know if this man is going to last that long.

And to be honest, I can't blame him.

#matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler imagines #matthew gray gubler imagine #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #dr spencer reid #spencer reid #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds oneshot #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid imagines #bau

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incorrectbatfam · 11 months ago

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Types of obnoxious batfam stans

Written by an obnoxious batfam stan

Not really a rant but something I've noticed over the years interacting in different spaces and I've decided to make your problem now.

Please note that I'm not saying there's any "right" way to be a fan because we all suck by virtue of being comic nerds, but there are certain kinds of batfamily fans that stick out to be in particular.

Anywho, here are 12 kinds of annoying batfam stans that you've probably run into and you better get a laugh out of it *points gun to your head*.

1) The Newbies Who Never Heard of Google

There's no shame in being new to something. It's a phase that we're all guaranteed to go through, whether we're 11 or 101. However, in this day and age, so many things can be easily googled that you don't need to shout every question you have into the VVorld VVide VVoid. If you need comic recs or a reading list, google it. If you wanna know a character's origin story, google it. If you need to know the color of Batman's underpants in a particular issue in 1965... well that's probably too specific for Google but Reddit will definitely have an answer.

2) The Middle School Authors

Before the 13-year-olds get up in my notes, I'm not saying everyone that age writes like this. Middle school is a state of mind. These fanfic writers usually stand out in a few ways.

They're oftentimes first-person POV or reader-insert. Give Y/N a break, she's tired.

The grammar is stunningly atrocious. I get if you're inexperienced or if you're writing in a second language, but we are in the prime era of autocorrect. If you need help, it's right there. Also, fuck c*nsoring b*d w*rds and fuck "unalive."

The characters do things that are out-of-character because the author is projecting their own personality. Bruce Wayne is a lot of things but he does not listen to the fucking Mountain Goats.

There's a lack of experience or research when it comes to certain topics. That's not how physics works. He can't walk that injury off. And that's definitely NOT how you do the horizontal hokey pokey.

3) The Neckbeards

Unfortunately, these basement-dwelling mouth-breathers tainted the image of what a comic fan is, though that's been changing recently. Still, we've all seen them. They gatekeep via pop quizzes, 'cause obviously you're not a real fan unless you know what page 10 of Batman #138 smells like. They give unsolicited commentary on people's cosplays, nitpicking the guys and being gross toward women. And heaven forbid the comics add a little diversity.

4) The Moviegoers

Nothing inherently wrong with getting into the fandom via the movies, nor is there anything wrong with sticking to that. I just feel like we're two different species of Galapagos finches, you know?

5) The Christopher Nolans

Separate from casual fans of the Nolan movies. I'm calling them the Christopher Nolans because these people have a tendency to reach for the grimdarkest thing possible. It's like they cannot fathom Batman having any other emotions besides punching and gargoyle brooding.

6) The Canon Purists

Wanna share a fun headcanon? NO, because Stephanie Brown never used cherry lip balm in the comics so therefore that must be the absolute truth. These people are a stickler for comic accuracy to the point where it's like... why bother interacting with the fandom in the first place? The worst part is when they're adamant on following a single continuity and refuse to consider anything else. This is comics we're talking about. Everything either has been or will be canon at some point.

7) The Fanon Worshippers

On the opposite end of the spectrum, we have the people who base their entire perception of the characters on something either they pulled out of their ass or that their mutual with 16 followers came up with, despite evidence directly contradicting it. I love WFA, but I feel like that's partially responsible for further perpetuating certain popular myths. Also, these fans tend to focus solely on the batfam/their ships. It's one thing to have some people in the foreground vs. background, but put some respect to Bart Allen's name you goddamn cheesecakes.

8) The Golden Age Dads

These guys aren't really obnoxious. I actually find it kind of cute how they think Jason Todd is still dead.

9) The Chronically Online

I have a rule of thumb when it comes to discourse: if it's not something I'd hear about at a bar, it's not worth my mental energy. Some people haven't gotten the memo, though.

These are either the well-intentioned but misinformed teenagers or grown-ass adults beefing with children because they don't have a life. They have takes that are oversimplified, rage-inducing, TikTok algorithm attention-grabbers that no one cares about in real life.

Don't get me wrong, we've got a bunch of issues in comics and fandom that are worth discussing. However, there comes a point where you're splitting hairs and need to go the fuck outside. I'm not gonna link the post 'cause I don't wanna call them and their 7 notes out, but the other week I saw someone saying Stephcass was a racist ship because something something colonialism parallel. You gotta be Elastigirl to have that kind of reach.

10) The Corporate Simps

I love comics. I appreciate the writers and artists. However, you will find my carcass in a ditch before you catch me licking the boots of DC/Warner Bros. Basically, these fans, fewer as they are, can't seem to fathom that their favorite franchise can (and does) put out some steaming motherfucking garbage.

11) The Hot Cosplayers

Not actually annoyed, I'm just a little jealous. Stop being hotter than me, please and thank you.

12) The One With A Punchline For Everything

Wait–

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hundredandsix · 2 years ago

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loser!ellie headcanons

✩ I haven't been able to get loser!ellie out of my head so...here we go. I love that this is basically the same thing as canon!ellie. Slutty thoughts at the end so mdni (18+) ✩

✩ I don't think she would be the first to make a move. She would do little, very subtle things like hold the door open for you and then panic because oh no that was too much! You're going to know!

✩ She would think she's being obvious, and she is, but not for the reasons she believes. Let's just say her brushing her hand against yours is not nearly as obvious as the way she follows you around and the way your smile makes her face turn red all the way to her ears.

✩ Speaking of her following your around, she is so unintentionally clingy, even before you get together. You would get up to go to the bathroom and when she realizes where you're going, she tries to play it off like she wasn't about to trail after you. When you bring it up to her, she's genuinely confused because no, she is not following you around on purpose. She would never do that.

✩ It would take her forever to realize you're into her, but when she finally picks up on it, that confirmation gives her confidence. She wouldn't be as afraid to make her feelings more apparent.

✩ Has such terrible rizz that it somehow comes full circle and makes her even more charming.

✩ She LOVES bossy, confident women. Ellie is not afraid to ask for what she wants, and she is definitely not the type of girl that would have you ask the waitress questions for her. But there's something about a woman that could put her in her place that she loves.

✩ At first, Ellie is always rubbing the back of her neck or playing with her fingers when she talks to you. She doesn't want to look like a dork, but she can't help it because you make her so nervous.

✩ She's literally the definition of a golden retriever masc. She's got the beat-up truck (that's actually Joel’s, but you don't have to know that), an outrageous amount of flannels, and carabiners to provide it.

✩ When she gets really excited about something, her brain moves faster than her mouth. She'll fumble her words and stutter. She gets really annoyed when this happens and has to take a deep breath and start over.

✩ She loves to rant about her interests to you. Don't you dare seem like you're not listening because she'll get really quiet and upset.

✩ I could see her having issues with being treated like "the man" in past relationships. It confuses her at first because she wants to protect her partner and care for them, but she also wants to feel that same love and desire toward her. She would be so drawn to you if you don't treat her any differently because of the way she dresses or presents herself. Obviously, she presents as more masculine, but she still wants to be treated like a woman.

✩ She has sooo many playlists. There are some about you of course but she also has some that are so highly specific. When you go on your first date, she has a playlist for picking you up and two different ones for dropping your off, depending on how it went. She definitely has the classic "depressed gay longing" playlist.

✩ She has exactly two pictures on her Instagram. One is her and Joel on his birthday and the other is a selfie she uses as her profile pic for everything.

✩ When you follow her back on Instagram, she loses her shit and starts fantasizing about what it would be like to be with you. She's screenshotting every selfie you put on your story and thinking about them in ways that are not very appropriate.

✩ She's the queen of "this reminded me of you" and will bring you literal rocks because "it looks like the whale from the aquarium we saw last week." Whether it's modern!ellie buying you little trinkets or jackson!ellie bringing you things from her patrols, she loves seeing you in all parts of her life. Even if you're not physically there with her.

✩ I love the pages of her journal we get to see in the game because they show us peeks at her internal monologue. They show us she is still very much the eccentric, starry-eyed girl we see in the first game. She's learned to hide it. Maybe to fit in or maybe because she's learned that wearing your heart on your sleeve can hurt. It's literally canon that she writes about her romantic feelings in her journal, so I think she would have little drawings and blurbs about you. She for sure has a stupid grin on her freckled face as she draws the highlights of your eyes and maybe even the dip of your hips. It's the only way she can think of to get you out of her head.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

✩ She's an ass girl. She loves every part of you and will literally kiss your eyelashes if you let her, but she has to physically hold herself back when you bend over.

✩ I can't think of who posted it, but I remember reading something about Ellie fake fucking you when you're bent over and she would totally do that at the absolute worst times. You'd swat her away and look at her with a raised eyebrow, but there's no stopping her because she thinks it's the funniest thing ever.

✩ The first time you kiss is an out-of-body experience for her. She's panicking because she didn't think she'd ever get this far. She wants to touch you but she doesn't know where or what you would like, so her arms are stuck at her sides. She's 🧍until you grab her hands and move them to your waist.

✩ Has a huge obsession with your neck. Loves to leave marks if you'll let her. Will come up behind you and wrap her arms around your waist while leaving wet kisses all down your neck.

✩ I could see her wanting to be both the big and little spoon. It depends on the day and the context. When she's the big spoon she'll jokingly hug you so tight you can barely breathe and wrap all of her limbs around you like she's trying to suffocate you. When she's the little spoon, she likes it when you play with her hair.

✩ Is an absolute slut for you playing with her hair. She's an insomniac and it helps her fall asleep. When you're arm gets tired and you want to stop, she'll whine and pull your hands back to her head.

✩ She would be more comfortable topping and doesn't want to admit that she likes to bottom just as much. She's a service top that would do anything to make you feel good.

✩ Girly is so shy when she bottoms. She'll get all blushy and tries to cover her face with her hands/arms. She loves it, but it feels so foreign to her to have someone's sole focus be on her.

✩ Loves eye contact, especially when your mouth is on her. If you look up at her from between her legs while giving her head, she has trouble thinking straight.

✩ Likes it when you pull her hair during sex and will groan for you to pull harder. Just move her wherever you want her because she thinks it's the hottest thing ever.

✩ I think she'd use a strap if you wanted her to, but it's not her instinct to grab for that. She rather you come apart on her fingers or mouth.

✩ If you wanted to use a strap on her, I think she would let you, but again, it's not something she would ask for. To Ellie, It would be more about pleasing you than her.

✩ Absolutely passes tf out after sex. She always tries to stay awake, but as soon as both of you are cleaned up, she's dozing off and letting out cute little snores.

✩ In summary, Ellie is the switchiest switch to ever exist and I will be taking no criticism on this

#hundredandsix #ellie williams smut #ellie tlou #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams #ellie williams x female reader #lesbian #tlou #tlou smut #ellie x reader #ellie williams x reader smut #ellie williams x you #ellie williams imagine #ellie x y/n #jackson ellie #bottom!ellie #switch!ellie #loser!ellie

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trexiejan · 10 months ago

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Some Toxic Dickbabs moments that happened in canon. (LONG POST)

so i saw a dickbabs shipper talking crap about dickkory saying they're the most toxic nightwing ship? and they also claim dickbabs is the most healthiest ? it's ironic considering I've seen many dickbabs comic panels where dickbabs is being toxic towards each other plenty of times in the canon comics. Looks like Tom Taylor wants to brainwash people and make them believe that Dickbabs is such a perfect healthy loving couple since day 1, when that hasn't been true at all before he was put in charge of the nightwing comics to write dickbabs wattpad fanfiction in the book every single issue, this ship has done nothing but damage both characters even in tom taylor's run Dick is turned into a happy go lucky himbo who is incapable of accomplishing anything on his own without being monitored and babysat by barbara 24/7.

Anyways let's proceed with dickbabs history of being a toxic couple.

Remember those times where Barbara physically and verbally assaulted him when he was only trying to be nice and polite. She yelled at him, called him stupid, a crybaby and beat him up.

Also they keep calling Kory a victim blamer for something that happened once in over 30 years ago but ignore the fact that Babs has victim blamed him and slutshamed him multiple times in the modern comics when he was sexually assaulted and raped by Tarantula and when he got shot in the head by the Joker.

Dick just got raped by Tarantula and was traumatized by what happened but instead of comforting Dick, she has the nerve to mockingly say Dick likes his rapist. her jealousy always clouds her judgement.

I'm sorry But Barbara is canonically a victim blamer and a slutshamer. Don't forget how she also insults and slutshames other women like Helena when she gets jealous of the other women in Dick's life. She called dickhelena a cheap one nightstand even though Dick clearly told Helena he doesn't do casual sex and and she mocked Kory and refused to help her on a mission when her people were dying.

so yeah let's get back to her history with victim blaming Dick. She victim blamed him again after he got shot in the head and had an amnesia and when his memories was restored, she lashed out at him for forgetting about her when he had an amnesia.

And remember that time when Bludhaven was burned down and Dick lost his apartment, he came to Barbara to ask if he can stay at her place but she kicked him out of her apartment the next day. She's totally fine with him being homeless but dickbabs shippers claim babs has always been very loving and supportive towards him while calling Kory a slut.

Even in elseworld stuff she treats him like garbage. Aside from cheating on Dick with Batman and getting pregnant with Batman's baby in the BTAS universe, she's also very emotionally abusive to him in comics where dickbabs shippers brag about them having a kid in it like in whiteknight.

Barbara was always out there acting like a toxic judgemental domineering bitch in the modern canon comics, Barbara behaved like this consistently for more than 30 years but Kory is the one we should crucify over something that she did only once from 30 years ago 🙄 Did they crucify Barbara too when she was ableist to Cass and called her stupid because she can't read.

And they call Kory a sexual assaulter? Because she kissed him when they first met. Did they forgot that Kory was an alien, she was clueless about Earth laws when she first came to earth, she didn't know that you're actually not supposed to kiss someone without their consent, she had no clue that it was considered inappropriate and she kissed him not to sexually assault him but for her to learn english. Her people can learn other languages through kissing and Kory didn't learn anything about Human law until she officially joined the teen titans, so you can actually excuse her for her behavior what's not excusable is Barbara who is a human being who studied law for years, but still has the nerve to commit a sexual crime. As always, She violated Dick's personal privacy, she put a spy camera on his apartment so she can enjoy watching him naked without his consent. Look it up on google the crime is called voyeurism. Barbara would be considered a creepy criminal by human law. I'm not surprised considering I always think of her as a type of gf who has no respect for her partner's personal space especially when she's Oracle, She never respected Dick's privacy even in tom taylor's run, she keeps monitoring his every move in her computer, she always invades his personal space. Dick is trapped in this relationship. It's not a good relationship if you constantly watch your partner's every move and if you keep following your partner around like a dog wherever he goes.

Many people think Dickbabs is such a healthy couple because of Tom Taylor's run. I think for someone who is a huge dickbabs shipper like tom taylor it's expected he's gonna try to convince people to believe that to sell his favorite ship but in reality even in Tom Taylor's run Dickbabs relationship is pretty toxic and forced. It's toxic when your partner doesn't respect your privacy, when your partner constantly stalks and keeps an eye on you on every single thing that you do, when you wanna talk to other people but she's there lurking in her computer listening to your conversations with other people, when she puts a camera on your mask so she can always see what you see and hear what you hear, as if you're not a real human being who needs your own privacy, and constantly follows you around like a dog, like Barbara does to him every single issue. It really is a sign of an abusive relationship when there is no respect. How is Tom Taylor's Nightwing good when the book keeps destroying Dick's independece by having Barbara stuck to him like a leech 24/7 . The book is called Nightwing but Tom Taylor turned it into a Nightwing and Batgirl fanfiction series where 90% of the time Dick hasn't done anything on his own and where his IQ is chopped off in half to prop up Barbara as the smarter woman in their relationship. Dick can't even handle his own missions without constantly being babysat by Barbara in her computer like a sidekick who needs to be watched 24/7.

Poor Dick he became Nightwing to stop being Batman's sidekick and be independent only for Barbara to take away his independence and treat him like a sidekick again. Dickbabs has always been a toxic ship in any kind of form.

and don't forget Tom Taylor himself is a toxic misogynist slutshamer. He keeps throwing shade on Kory on twitter by liking comments that slutshame her on twitter

You know what would be the best way to fix dickbabs? is by letting them move on from each other! Let them grow tf up and move forward in life outside this relationship.

Babs is an anchor that brings him down whenever she's too involved in his life and same with Babs because do dickbabs shippers even care about Barbara. I haven't seen any barbara fan complain about barbara not doing anything on her own other than chasing dick around like a dog in his comicbook every single issue.

#dickbabs #anti dickbabs #antidickbabs #anti tom taylor #dickbabs shippers are the most hypocritical fandom i've ever seen

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breakyourrxles · 17 days ago

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❥between two breaths (m) | 𝟟

𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥

↳ Lulled into a false sense of security, disaster strikes MVNE in a way that feels far too close to home, and as a result, you lose just that much more willingness to make the decisions that you know you should.

kim sunwoo x fem!reader (side lee juyeon x reader) — idol!sunwoo, fan/trainee!reader. forced proximity, forbidden love, friends to lovers, angst, slow burn, idolverse-typical themes regarding; dating, image, public perception, etc. happy ending, plot-heavy!! reader thinks she's nonchalant about it but she rly isn't. smut. [6,2k wc ongoing] cws: heavy themes of wanting-but-can't-having, mild jealousy, explicit sexual content, a little alcohol consumption, dancing on the edge of career suicide, poor decision making because of The Wanting.

❥ masterlist | ao3

Woori huffs out a chuckle from under her breath and says, "Some of us are a little more bound to the rules of hierarchy than others. I've witnessed that with my very own eyes."

For reasons that you cannot quite come to understand, content filmed with Juyeon is incredibly well-received.

MVNE's comeback is slated for early March, and with only a few days remaining of February you have spent far more time with him than the man you are actually friends with.

However, training with Juyeon has been easy and incredibly lucrative. He is kind and talented and happy to lend what he can to you to the best of his ability. He is not pushy; does not think himself to be better than or above you in any conceivable way, and though the two of you had entered this circumstance with little intention of actualized growth, you realize that you have, in fact, benefited greatly from his services.

There are other more pressing matters to tend to, though.

You need to talk to Woori, and doing so in a private setting just for the two of you has proven to be incredibly difficult over the past few months. It has become increasingly unusual for any of you to be in situations where there are no prying ears that may be able to overhear a conversation, and any singular moments of such are quickly ended by a manager or another member quickly shuffling through and breaking any privacy that you may have found.

Thus, you will have to force the issue, because this cannot go on for any longer without knowledge of where everything currently stands.

Vocal training is less tiresome this comeback on account of being heavily dance-performance based. The debut was a song meant to showcase those skills, and now MVNE will round out to showcase a different set of them. It will highlight members like you, Woori and another girl—Hyemi—who is something of an all-arounder, though you've not had much chance to garner closeness with her compared to some of the other members in the group.

It's still early on and in all fairness to her, you consider this a fairly expected occurrence. With so many women in a group and little time spent during the actual trainee process, the majority of you are still effectively strangers to each other. You don't share a dorm with Hyemi, and unlike Woori, she has not had the misfortune of dealing with all of your unexpected and undesired situations, either.

You do still remember her, though. As one of the girls who sat giggling in the shadows when the details of your previous involvement with Sunwoo began to rear its ugly head.

Water under the bridge, or so you would like to believe.

The producer finally calls the day once Miyoung finishes a line after only a handful of takes. You and Woori sit on the leather couch together and alternate between cheering her on and scrolling through your phones as to not make her so nervous that she cannot focus, and while the producer gives Miyoung feedback, you take this as your only opportunity to finally put an end to the torment of the unknown that has festered in your mind ever since then.

You lean over slightly to her and say, "Can we talk privately after this?"

Woori stops scrolling, her eyes pop up from the screen and stare ahead as if she is somewhat confused by this offering. "Sure, I'll tell her to go ahead when we're all finished up."

Miyoung waves as she meanders down the hall, leaving only you and your leader remaining there. Neither of your managers are all that thrilled about being asked to leave the both of you to it, but with little risk assessed of the situation, they agree and head for the elevator themselves.

When the coast is clear, all of the performative confidence that Woori has drains from her figure. Her shoulders droop, an exhausted sigh leaves her, and she slumps herself lazily against the wall.

"What did you want to talk about?"

The question confuses you, because how could she not know the purpose of your gathering here today? It seems sincere, and her attention remains firmly focused on you as she awaits your response. Thus, you have no other option than to take it in good faith, inhale a sharp breath that you hope gives you the strength to once again revisit this, and you say, "That night. At the party."

"I thought we already talked about it, we talked about it then. What's left?"

"Have you… told anyone else about it?"

Woori's face immediately twists into a grimace and without a moment of silence following the question she quickly replies, "What? No! Of course not, why would I tell anyone?"

"I just didn't know if any of the other girls—"

"Look," Woori interjects quickly, "I'm none too thrilled about it, but going around and gossiping about it isn't going to make it better, and would likely only make things worse." She bobbles her head amusedly a bit, eyebrows perking up like she's sort of having fun with the whole idea now and then says, "I have concerns, sure, but that's for me to worry about, not anyone else. We will handle the situation, we are the only ones that need to know about the extent of it, especially in the event that this gets… Well, messier than what you think it will be. Which is likely."

"Likely?" you reiterate, mildly slighted by the assumption.

"Yes, likely. If it happens once, who's to say it won't happen again."

Oops.

"And then," Woori goes on to say, "Who's to say it won't continue, or become even more of a thing. I know you said it won't but it's a dangerous game to play. There's the logic of it versus everything else, and let's be honest; you're interested."

You swallow hard. "I wouldn't say I'm interested."

"If you weren't, it never would have happened to begin with. If you weren't, you probably never would have been his fan to begin with," Woori reasons. "I get it, and as much as it kind of terrifies me and the future of this group, I'm not going to sit here and play dumb about the whole thing; pretend that anyone saying it's a bad idea is going to magically talk some sense into you and nothing will ever happen again. Maybe you're that delusional, but it's at least good if one of us isn't."

"I'm not delusional!" you say, though there is hardly enough bite in your tone to make it sound even remotely believable. She is reading you to completion, and there's little you can do to dampen the blow.

She gives you a knowing look. "Just… Do me a favor and try to be smart about whatever it is that you're going to do, and if nothing else happens, then great! But if it does, just try to remember that your choices are going to impact a lot of people, not just yourself. About nineteen other people, in fact, but who's counting?"

When she finishes, silence finds the hallway between you. The two of you look at one another for a long moment, as if an unspoken agreement is being made at this very moment. Woori is logical and reasonable; isn't interested in trying to micromanage and determine your life. You appreciate this about her, though in an effort to understand the source of her acceptance, you cannot help but ask the most obvious and pressing question left behind.

"Why does it sound like you're giving me permission to do this?"

Woori pushes herself off the wall and once again finds the wherewithal to maintain her typically poised stature. She looks at you, smiles and simply says, "Because you're going to do whatever it is that you want to do anyway. They always do."

"The final TikTok," Juyeon announces through an alleviated huff, "Good riddance."

The dance studio is humid and the air is heavy with the remnants of many hours spent practicing for the final time together. Your shirt is soaked through with sweat, Juyeon's hair sticks in black pieces to his forehead, and empty bottles of water litter the sidelines after having long since served their purpose.

It's bittersweet in a lot of ways. Over the weeks, your relationship with Juyeon has easily transformed from that of strictly colleagues to something far more familiar to you as a friendship. Being around him feels so natural, and Juyeon is kind and gentle in ways that might come as a surprise to those less knowledgeable and only basing their assumption off of his appearance. In reality, Juyeon is funny and personable; you enjoy your time with him on the days that you are scheduled to have it, and now find yourself mourning the future loss of that as a part of work in your life.

He posts the last video and tiredly makes his way over towards you. With his back against the wall, he takes a sip from a crushed water bottle and then glances down to say, "Content aside, it's a little unfortunate that this is coming to an end. It's nice to spend some time with someone that isn't the same people I see every single day."

"It's been nice," you agree, perching up beside him similarly. "I don't know, maybe we can keep doing it. Talk to our managers, it's obviously been helping me, but it's probably a hard sell to make it worth your time to them if not for the content portion of it all."

With the bottle pressed to his lips, Juyeon smirks. "Well, they don't have to know everything we do every second of the day, either."

Curiously, your eyebrow perks up and you look towards him. "Are you suggesting we sneak off together and engage in scandalous activities such as… dance practice?"

"I might be."

And it is easy, you know this better than perhaps even he does. The amount of sneaking around that Sunwoo has done prior to your life now, and even just the amount of time you and him have managed to attain since then just goes to show the simplicity of carving out the precise right slot in the day to do whatever it is that you might set your sights on doing. However, the thought of Sunwoo lingers in your mind once it enters, as does his hopeful insistence of the two of you continuing to engage in activities that neither of you should be doing at all. What Juyeon is proposing is the kind of thing that would garner a displeased slap on the wrist from management but otherwise, would be forgotten just as quickly as it would be found out. What Sunwoo is proposing, however, could become an avalanche of misfortune with insurmountable collateral damage.

So why have you not told him no yet?

"Of course," Juyeon starts, cutting through your thoughts, "I understand the trainee life and that of women especially is much more precarious than where I stand now. You have a lot more to lose, so I don't really blame you if you don't want to push your luck."

"Oh, you know about women's lives in the industry, do you?" you reply, playfully doubtful in tone.

"Naturally," he says, a sharp glance once again finding you. "I have dated since becoming an idol, after all."

For reasons entirely unbeknownst to you, this information comes as a surprise. It shouldn't, not by any logical metric, but you cannot help the welling curiosity that begins to bubble up inside of you as you scan over his features for any hint of jest that he may be offering you. There is none.

"And how did that go?" you question plainly, hoping to play off your budding interest in the topic.

Juyeon shrugs and says, "The way it typically goes. It wasn't anything serious, which is also the way these things typically go."

You mouth an ah in response before verbally replying. "Right. A means to an end."

"Not necessarily. You make it sound so… mechanical. So robotic." He laughs, finishes the remaining water and then lazily tosses it towards the pile of the rest. "It's less like that—at least for me—and more like… I can genuinely care for someone and have interest in them but still understand that we're both involved in a lifestyle that doesn't really lend itself to any meaningful outcome, you know? Who knows, maybe if we weren't doing this then it could have been something long-term, but we are doing it, and it can't, so it just is what it is."

"Are you seeing anyone now?"

The question falls from your lips before you have a chance to think twice about it, before you have the opportunity to reconsider whether or not it is even appropriate for you to ask. Mortified by your shortsightedness, you rush to amend the misstep but before you are able to get the words out, Juyeon is already leaning towards you with squinting, menacing eyes and minutely upturned corners of his lips that appear so sly and calculated.

"Wouldn't you like to know."

The two of you have been in close proximity before, though not without the limiting veil of work hanging heavily between you. Now, Juyeon's face is close enough that you can easily see the detailed handiwork of the stylist that has applied dark, shimmery shadows to his eyes and a fine line to the corners to aid in elongating them. A sinister stage persona—devilish in appearance but so different from the person that you have since discovered him to be.

Your breath sits caught in your throat, and you are rescued by the sound of the door being abruptly shoved open and a familiar voice echoing through the otherwise quiet space.

"You have to come with me to a schedule tomorrow, Kevin doesn't want to go because he isn't feeling well and—Oh."

Snapping to attention, you look in the direction from which the voice has come, and though you're a little thankful for the interruption… It certainly could have been pretty much anyone else.

Sunwoo stands only a few footsteps inside, the door automatically closing behind him. He blinks a few times without saying a word, but that is short-lived, as you would expect it to be. "Uh, hello? Did I fuckin' interrupt something?"

His voice lends a comical aid, rather than something angry like the words might suggest. You do, however, know better than to hinge all of your trust in regards to Sunwoo's feelings on any particular thing on his immediate, in the moment delivery.

"No! We were just talking, don't be ridiculous," you say. "Why do you always have to jump to the weirdest case scenario?"

"Uh, looks pretty fuckin' weird to me," Sunwoo says, crinkling his nose in disgust. "He's all looming and limbs. Scary."

You look back at Juyeon, who rolls his eyes and shrugs before making his way towards Sunwoo. He makes an attempt to throw an arm around Sunwoo's shoulders, a gesture that is quickly rebuffed, and gives up fairly easily after that.

"You don't have anything to worry about," Juyeon says, face leaned down towards Sunwoo's face. They are making their way away from you and towards the door, and though you can't see the entirety of Juyeon's expression, you can make out enough of that lighthearted predisposition for trouble that lets you know he is about to set this whole thing up in flames. He makes another attempt to wrap an arm around Sunwoo, and though it is ardently fought off he says, "After all, we're just friends."

Sunwoo reels and jolts himself out of Juyeon's grasp in ways that you can only describe as cartoonish. He is babbling and cursing through Juyeon's exuberant giggles, and though the gall to make such a joke is not lost on you, Sunwoo's precious sensibilities in relation to it have long fallen to the wayside in favor of hearty laughter; watching on as Sunwoo chases the culprit around the room with viciously murderous intent.

Three days later, you wake up to the sound of loud, frantic pounding against your closed bedroom door.

You are tired and startled, shooting upright in your bed and to the point that you nearly bang your head against the wooden frame that holds the topmost bunk. This is all a little incomprehensible to you immediately; what day it is, what time it is, whether or not any of this is even happening at all, but even though the noise stops for a moment, it begins again with little more repreve.

So, you call out to grant yourself time and give acknowledgement of some sort of message being received. You shuffle your sweatpants on and wrangle a sweatshirt that may or may not be backwards but based on the urgency of the sound, that's of little consequence to you right now.

The door swings open, Miyoung and Nara are standing just in front with phones in hand and abject concern splashed across their faces. They look nothing short of absolutely horrified and for a split second, your stomach simply drops.

"Something happened," Miyoung says, and then presents to you the article brought up on the screen. "Woori is coming soon, we have to go in for a meeting right now."

Reading over the text, your stomach continues to fall but your anxiety dissipates ever so slightly. This is bad, very bad for the lot of you but… not for you in particular. There is always a chance, some inkling of a possibility that some misdoing of yours is somehow going to trickle out from its containment and find its way into the hands of people that it does not need to be. That is not the case today. At least, not for you.

This does, however, explain a lot of previous threads of confusion.

"Where is Hyemi?" you ask.

"At her dorm," Nara says. Her arms are crossed over her chest and she appears to be a little less concerned and far more amused by all of this. Suppose you land somewhere in between. "Which is probably for the best. I can't believe that after everything, we're still going through this."

Fair enough, because your name is mentioned in the article but only in a passing acknowledgment of the connection between the two. You blink slowly and then read through the article a quick second time, just to make sure you're understanding all of this correctly. Really, there's no mistaking it, though.

The post is from a gossip news site that, while not wholly reputable, is reputable enough that people follow it and most certainly use it to keep up with celebrity happenings. It alleges that MVNE member Hyemi has lived a previous secret life of being a dedicated fansite of a currently active male idol group—something she has decided to keep under wraps in hope of it never seeing the light of day—and is now being forced out into the spotlight in the most distasteful and unbecoming ways.

There are photos included. Screenshots of her fansite and pictures of her at events with her equipment and other friends presumably doing much of the same. Why she would attempt to hide this, you cannot begin to understand, but the group in question has done numerous appearances alongside The Boyz, and suddenly, everything during your trainee days begins to come together with the final recovered puzzle piece.

She has seen you before, and perhaps, had been hoping to use this knowledge against you in an effort to gain the upperhand.

Your mention in the article is incredibly brief, only a callback to the fact that you have similar fandom backgrounds but chose to be transparent about this fact from the very beginning. A little ironic, you think, the voice chosen throughout, because it was hardly a choice you had made of your own and rather a hand forced in an effort to minimize future scenarios just like this one.

Turns out that was the correct decision, after all.

A knock comes at the front door of your dorm and Nara rushes off to answer it. There are a couple of girls' voices heard—Woori's in particular—and so you and Miyoung make the decision to join them rather than lingering in the doorway.

Head bowed, Hyemi stands behind Woori with an obvious reluctance to enter.

"You could have just been honest," Nara says straight away, and the anger in her voice is evident though she is clearly making an attempt to reel it back. "You weren't even the only one, you saw that the company was going to be able to handle it. We could have mitigated all of this, and now we're just going through it regardless of any other effort made. Why weren't you just honest?"

Woori's eyes cast towards her, a stern look apt for a leadership role. She doesn't say anything, but the point is still made: Take it easy.

"I'm sorry," Hyemi says. Her tone is soft, voice broken and meek and no ability to meet the eyes of anyone else in attendance of her lashing. "I just… I didn't want anyone to know. I was scared."

"You were perfectly happy to let everyone know about my history," you say.

This must strike something particular inside of her. Hyemi's attention snaps to you, eyebrows furrowed in a sort of disdainful way and she abruptly answers, "We were trainees and it was cutthroat! I was going to do whatever it took to make sure I was able to debut."

"Wow," Nara says, head shaking slowly, "So, you really were trying to get her eliminated by spreading that rumor."

"Well, it wasn't much of a rumor, was it? It was true! I never lied, I didn't make anything up. I thought there was no chance that the company would allow a fan of one of their senior idols to debut in a group, so it wasn't meant to turn into such a big situation. If they had made the right choice—to eliminate her—then even if my history came to light then it wouldn't look so bad with nothing to compare it to. How was I supposed to know that these people were happy to leverage it for some fun, quirky little story?"

"I don't think talking about this right now is going to get us anywhere," Woori interjects. "We have to go in for a meeting to discuss what this is going to mean for all of us moving forward and how they're going to handle it from here on out. We have a festival appearance in five days that we have to focus on. We really don't have time to lend to this right now."

"So, what? I just have to pretend that she wasn't trying to ruin my career because it suited her own, personal narrative? I have to pretend that everything is fine?" you question.

Looking directly at you, there is something knowing and apprehensive in Woori's gaze. Deep down, you know precisely what it is meant to convey. A silent insistence to stand down, because you are standing far from a place of higher ground. The rest of the members may not know it, but the two of you most certainly do.

Hyemi made a poor choice when the two of you were strangers and being a trainee felt something akin to a life or death situation. You have made a choice now, and the feeling of Sunwoo's hair tangled between your fingers is not something you have easily forgotten.

"Yeah," Woori eventually says, her tone pointed and knowing. "That's exactly what you're going to do. Welcome to being an idol."

Tensions are high backstage, and with no particularly interested eyes glued to your every minute movement, you are allowed to express your feelings precisely as they come to you within these private, confined walls.

It is always best to put on a happy face with and in front of staff, and you are happy to do so. The people in charge of making sure that you present to the fans as the best possible version of yourself are everything you could have ever hoped for; lovely and kind, fun and thoughtful and you genuinely enjoy being around them. The rest of the girls are laughing and talking amongst themselves around you as they dress and primp themselves for the inevitable performance that awaits you soon, though Hyemi sits relatively quiet in comparison and evidently still tormented by whatever the future holds.

On the company side, they will handle it to the best of their ability but as a result of the way that the information has come out, there is little that they can do to circumvent it. The rest is up to the fans and the various people who happen to stumble across it. Admittedly, the general perception is not kind, and part of that is in contrast to you.

She should have just been honest about it, one comment had said. The other girl admitted her past and we all laughed and moved on, why couldn't she do the same?

It's not even an idol in the same company, another user posted. This is so embarrassing for her now. Being sneaky and trying to hide it but eventually, it all comes out, doesn't it?

It's weird to debut girls who have a history of being fangirls already, but at least the SW fan came out with it honestly and didn't try to hide. That can at least be respected.

You close the browser tab, set your phone down, and catch Woori's eyes from beside you in the reflection of the mirror.

She is watching you intently, but this is far from the kind of place to engage in any sort of discussion about the topic. From where you sit, you can see the way that she is nervously chewing at the inside of her cheek, eyes still fixed on you as if there is something that she desperately wishes to say, but can't.

So, you inhale sharply and simply say, "It's fine. We're all gonna move on from this."

"I know that, but I also know what contempt looks like when I see it."

You search for Hyemi in the reflection, seated off to the back corner and alone as she scrolls through her phone solemnly. No doubt reading much of the same comments that you were just now.

"Am I not allowed that?"

"You are, but divisiveness within the group isn't going to do any of us any favors. You're going to have to let it go."

"I know, and I will, but you'll have to forgive me for still feeling as though it's fairly fresh," you say. "It hasn't even been a week. I was forced into a situation where I had to put all of my business out for public scrutiny regardless of my feelings about it by someone who had been doing the same."

"And you came out on top as a result of it," Woori reasons, turning her attention to her own reflection now. "Hyemi is being eaten alive by public perception and you are being heralded as this strong bastion of honesty." Her eyes find you again, but this time there is a coyness to her expression. "Is that really fair?"

You know as well as she does that the answer is no, because there are many skeletons that linger in your closet. Sinister, and far more disastrous secrets that could easily spell the end for your career in its entirety. No more media play, no more discussions on how to move forward; it could very well be the nail in the coffin. The only thing standing between you and that fate is Woori, Sunwoo, and a dash of luck.

Though your stomach twists at the thought, Woori's ambient insistence of the fact carries truth. It isn't fair for you to hold this against Hyeri as much as you seem to be, and eventually, you are simply going to have to get over it. Sooner, rather than later.

Still, you want. You are angry, and the offering of something beyond what has been previously explored still sits somewhere in the back of your mind no matter how many times you have made the effort to completely dispel it. Bad choices have been made, but far better ones have won out and with much more frequency than even you would prefer. At some point, you wonder if the thread is going to snap, and then the pieces must simply fall where they may.

You can't avoid Sunwoo forever, and though you have the ultimate option of telling him that enough is enough and that this must not continue to move forward, you have not done so; nor can you seem to muster up the ability to.

And worst of all: A part of you believes that you can get away with it.

"All I'm saying," Woori begins again, "Is try to take it easy on her. You guys are stuck together, and who knows what might happen in the future."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She shoots you a look, one that implies that the both of you know very well what it is that she is referring to.

"It means that I've got my work cut out for me, and I'd like for MVNE to have a little bit of a stronger foothold in the industry before something tries to bring it all crashing down."

The response dissatisfies you, though there is little that you can say given your current surroundings. Your attention leaves her and instead settles on the reflection ahead. Anger rears itself inside of you, skin prickling ever so slightly at the desire to express yourself in all of the ways that you absolutely cannot. Everything is appearances now. Outside of the company building or your home, you have no ability to conduct yourself as anything less than perfectly becoming.

Now, that fact is making your stomach turn.

"Would be nice if I wasn't the only one on the receiving end of such criticisms," you say, firm and resolute in your convictions. You don't need to name any names, because you know perfectly well that your leader is more than capable of threading the needle of suggestion. "But I guess hierarchy doesn't allow for such a thing, does it?"

And as if the words roll off her back without so much as a second thought, Woori huffs out a chuckle from under her breath and says, "Some of us are a little more bound to the rules of hierarchy than others. I've witnessed that with my very own eyes."

There is less than ten minutes until call, and in the narrow corridors backstage bodies are crammed between equipment in an attempt to keep everyone precisely where they need to be.

Over twenty idols stand there in the enclosed space—including MVNE—and your senior group are quickly being shuffled to join the fray. There are staff members everywhere; venue people, sound people, visual coordinators, managers and last minute stylists meant to make sure every hair and piece of fabric is exactly where it needs to be once the audience's eyes fall upon it. Your group is meant to go first, the minutes are ticking by faster than you can even fathom, and more than anything is that mixture of anger and adrenaline that relentlessly still courses through your veins.

Your attention is not on any one thing or person in particular, and your thoughts are lost on the conversation you had with Woori only a short time prior. Her words repeatedly cycle through your head, each time only adding more and more to the contempt that has already been festering inside of you.

The lights are low here, and visibility is so incredibly limited that you have noticed that the venue staff have little other option than to aid in getting the idols up the stairs and towards the stage. You can barely even make out the expression of the girls to either side of you, much less those of the people further up ahead. A sliver of light shines in from the opening leading up and out from this place, but does little to illuminate where you stand as of now.

Murmurs amongst groupmates fall away in favor of a loud, booming sound system that displays a VCR on the screen for the audience to enjoy. The crowd springs to attention, their cheers crashing in and serving as an aid to ready you for this upcoming performance. Soon, you will go on stage and pretend that absolutely nothing is wrong behind the scenes, that everything is perfect and the ten of you could not be any happier being together like this. Fanservice will be displayed between you and your leader, Hyemi will smile and do aegyo and thank everyone wholeheartedly for coming without ever alluding to the fact that a dark cloud of distruth hangs widely over her head. Tonight, you all will play pretend. Tonight, you will put on your very best performance thus far.

A staff member calls out eight minutes from somewhere, though it's impossible to place them. It's too dark, too loud; all of your senses are overstimulated.

Then, a hand wraps tightly around your wrist and you are firmly yanked away from your current standing position.

You think to scream, yet cannot even manage to, making your best attempt to not stumble to your knees as you desperately find your footing. Instead, a curse drops from your mouth before you have the opportunity to consider it unbecoming of an idol at an event, and what that grants you in response is a voice that is all too familiar.

"Relax," it says.

The word can barely be heard over all of the other noise, but you know it for what it is as soon as it leaves the lips that have uttered it. Your head is spinning with disorientation by the time you are capable of standing on your own without help, but just as quickly, your back is shoved up against a wall; hands are tightly gripped against either side of your waist as if you give you no hope of ever escaping them, and soft known lips once again find your own.

And worst of all, you give in. You give in to it all. Though your surroundings are pertinent to you, you allow yourself to have this and relish in everything being offered. Your own hands match Sunwoo's placement on you, pulling him closer and harsher against your body. He must not be expecting it, because you feel a gentle curve of his lips against yours as if surprisingly pleased by his findings. This is insane, this is dangerous, but most of all; it is intoxicating.

Sunwoo holds himself against you with a kind of confident insistence that you don't have the wherewithal to withstand. The fragrance clinging to his skin is potent and does little to assist you in gathering your strength to put any sort of end to this, and that is only compounded once his lips smooth down to your jaw, and continue a warm, premeditated path along the column of your neck.

"Makeup," you say, the best that you can do with the way your mind is racing.

He smiles against the skin, lips pressing and teeth lightly nipping just below your ear. "You think I don't know that?" he says.

With no more strength left in you to fight this, your head falls back against the wall and grants him full access to that which he desires. You've fought this—perhaps not to the best of your ability—but god does it feel so good to just give in and let go.

Sunwoo's hands smooth from your waist around to your back, pulling you impossibly tighter against his hips. There is next to no space left between your bodies to be spoken of. A silent hunger for something previously dismissed now the driving force within an engagement that should not be taking place at all.

This is not the time nor the place, and Sunwoo expresses the notion just as much as you know it to be true.

His lips find the shell of your ear, your skin tingles at the sensation of warm breath cascading across the flesh there. He says, "Please see me later, after this." Tonally however, his insistence is desperate. Begging not far off from being an operative word for it. His mouth presses into your neck again before you have the chance to reply, his hips offering a slightly more pertinent and expressive press against your own in such a way that any convictions you might have had about the plea immediately melt away in favor of something far more risky and duly desired. "No one will know," he says against the skin, "Our little secret."

Sunwoo comes up again, kisses you on the mouth with a sort of feral hunger you've not yet felt from him, and with barely even a second to catch a glimpse of the cunning grin plastered across his face once he pulls himself away from you he just as quickly shoves you back out into the sea of hustling, endlessly moving bodies of people; little more to take away from it all than the lingering feeling of his body against yours and a heavy question of where it will be that you find yourself in the late hours of the night.

#sunwoo smut #tbz smut #the boyz smut #sunwoo x reader #sunwoo imagines #sunwoo scenarios #tbz x reader #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #the boyz x reader #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #kpop fanfic #kpop smut

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wutheringskies · 1 year ago

Text

Wei Wuxian: The Untamed Hero

Wei Wuxian had to be killed even if:

1. He carried his sword

2. He didn't use gui dao

3. He didn't create Yin HuFu

4. The Wen remnants were not in the plot

Then, why? The reason is here, voiced by Jin Zixun of all people:

Wei WuXian, you are too bold! Did the LanlingJin Sect invite you today? And you dare run wild here. Do you really think that you’re invincible, that nobody has the courage to confront you? Do you want to overturn the Heavens?”

Wei WuXian smiled, “You’re comparing yourself to the Heavens? Excuse my language, but your face is a little too thick, isn’t it?”

So, you see, this untamed heart can only meet with tragedy as the world is unrighteous, as those who are in power think their actions cannot be contested (and they often aren't!), and that their words are like the law. How many times have we seen, a convicted powerful person escape the justice system? Far too many. And how many times innocents or victims were framed for crimes? Also too many. People like Wei Wuxian aren't condemned by fate, but rather, being born into a world where the "heavens" are those who are powerful and corrupted, he very well might be destined to live tragically, along with others of his type.

Returning to the matter of this particular scene: on one hand, the Jins throw private banquets, gilded with gold. The major scandals are: Jin Zixun is forcing the Lans to drink alcohol! You see, Lan Xichen can't outrightly refuse, so he is trying to be polite about his rejection. Jin Guangyao is trying to reason and excuse, and distract. The crowd spurs Jin Zixun on, wanting to see the Lans drink for once and fall to their level.

Everyone is in their own fine little world, doing their niceities in their golden halls drinking expensive wine, admiring pretty women, gasping at scandalous behavior, asking for favour, gossiping etc.

And then Wei Wuxian walks in. Uninvited. He simply drinks the wine himself, before demanding these people to spare him their time for real wordly issues, such as deaths, debts, cruelty, the parts that society wishes to hide. A few scenes later, we are shown with much description, just how terrible Qiongqi Path is. That's the Jin's backyard. You see their achievements that are drawn on those big walls? We see the reality of the people making them.

Now, let us come to another incident. Think of the soup incident. I fully expect before Wei Wuxian came into the scene, people were simply gossiping, uninterested in finding out what was going on, why Lady Jiang is crying. Then, Wei Wuxian comes and realizes Jiang Yanli who never really cries... was crying, and firstly decides to beat the shit out of Jin Zixuan. Secondly, he understands the whole truth, beats Jin Zixuan up for humiliating his Shijie, and also makes the other girl face responsibility.

Although his shijie had an easy temper, except for how they cuddled and cried together the day the three of them reunited after Lotus Pier was destroyed, she hadn’t really shed many tears in front of others, much less cry so loudly, so pitifully in front of so many people. Wei WuXian was filled with panic. As he tried to ask her, Jiang YanLi was crying so badly that she couldn’t even speak properly. Then, when he saw Jin ZiXuan standing on the side, astonished, he fumed with anger, wondering to himself why it was the dog of a person again. With a kick, he pounced on Jin ZiXuan. The fight between the two would have alerted the Heavens. All of the cultivators around the base came to break up their fight. Amid the ruckus, he finally understood what was the cause of all this, and became even more angered. He spread his tough talk, saying that one day he’d definitely make Jin ZiXuan die in his hands, he told people to drag out the cultivator woman.

A round of questions later, the truth emerged, and Jin ZiXuan’s entire body was frozen. No matter how much Wei WuXian continued to curse at him, he returned neither words nor fists, his face dark. If not that Jiang YanLi held up her hand a while later, while Jiang Cheng and Jin GuangShan came to pull Wei WuXian away, it was likely that even now Jin ZiXuan wouldn’t be able to attend the hunt of Phoenix Mountain.

See.

The point is, perhaps, people feel Wei Wuxian's actions are unnecessary. But imagine if he wasn't there! The consequences as I predict them will have been:

1. Jiang Cheng who doesn't want to upset a prominent clan would've grumbled and cursed underneath his breath, but eventually just moved away from the ruckus and taken his sister away.

2. Perhaps the truth would never have been found out, unless Jin Zixuan later searched by himself.

3. Thus, Jiang Yanli's reputation would be stained for the years to come.

It's because Wei Wuxian dared that the truth was revealed. I took this small incidents simply to highlight this, without the addition of more factors. In the book, often, it might seem like people are trying to stop him from creating trouble. You might often wish, ugh, this is going to be so bad... The point is Wei Wuxian knows! He's not stupid, he knows of the consequences of his actions.

But he isn't the one creating trouble. It was already created by the likes of those very people who try to stop him from investigating deeper. The trouble in question is that immoral and unrighteous words and actions and decisions have already been made. Society tries to hide them. If you can't see it, it's not there. Yet, even if it is not visible, a crime has its traces and it will bleed into their world sooner or later.

Wei Wuxian forces people to snap out of their comfort zones. He doesn't care for the barriers they set around themselves. Here are some examples to explain what I mean by these barriers:

Who dares hit Jin Zixuan, who's the only heir of LanlingJin, even when he deserves it? Protected by his status, his birth, his clan who dares? Wei Wuxian does.

Who dares to annoy Lan Wangji, the second jade of Lan, who from birth is considered otherwordly, strict, immovable, rigid, untouchable and protected by his extreme cold aura? Wei Wuxian dares.

Who dares to enter cultivation society without even wielding sword, without even cultivating a core? Wei Wuxian!

Since time unknown, treasures have belonged to the powerful sects: The Lan Clan and their library, their many secret techniques. The Jin clan and their treasures, their gold. The Nie Sabres. The Zidian. Yet, a son of a servant somehow ends up possessing the most powerful treasure all by his own! Everyone goes to this popular refinery, some famed blacksmith, or that popular sect to get specially created spiritual weapons, yet Chenqing, one of the most powerful weapons, was forged alone by Wei Wuxian during his 3 months in the Burial Mound!

Since years, the cultivation world has taken to heart rules of Lans, words of the powerful sects, and their leaders! Then, once again, this orphan child comes and bends the world and changes the cultivation society forever! Yiling Laozu said that... Yiling Laozu created... Yiling Laozu's manuscripts...

His words literally become the law.

Think of how 13 years after Wei Wuxian's death when "all was peaceful" despite us knowing very well, just how much shit happened after his death - slaughter of minor clans, deaths of two prominent sect leaders, xue yang etc (because, you know, most of it was purely accidental, kept hush-hush, or the victims were people who weren't important), he comes back to life and in a matter of a couple of months, upends the cultivation society again.

The "problem" is that this guy simply doesn't conform. The problem is that he is better. The problem is that he is not unnecessarily humble about it, despite his origins. He doesn't seem to treat himself as an outlier, but an equal. (That's why I hate insecure Wei Wuxian, like this guy is righteous enough he won't even treat himself badly.) The problem is that all those barriers - social classes, power, the locked doors - they won't keep him away.

Even if he was only the Jiang Da-shixiong with a bright golden core, he will still not be a conformist. To those who aren't used to having their decisions questioned, he is their worst enemy. To whose who are used to talking in circles, spreading rumors, he is asking them. What source do you have? What is the factual evidence behind what you are saying? Why are you saying this now?

Think of how he cross questioned a petty seller selling Yiling Laozu portraits in Qinghe, and how he questioned the gathered cultivation sects in Lotus Pier during Sisi and Bicao's intervention with the same sort of attitude. Surely, there was a major class difference, power difference between the two. Yet, they don't matter to him. What matters is the truth.

So, no matter what, when the people who are in power, start having too much dirty laundry and corpses in their backyards, he will definitely know. For this guy, knowing isn't enough - he will get to the crux of the issue. The problem is, he even has the skill for it. He has the ability. One also can't distract him with offers, promises, gifts, riches, status, women. He doesn't care for any of that. He perhaps might even hate one's victims. Yet he will stand up for them.

Of course, those who are in power, all smile at each other. They understand things sometimes have to be done. People sometimes have to be silenced. "We know better."

Then, Wei Wuxian comes in and says, actually you don't. He comes in with factual accounts, evidences, forces you to face your misdeeds. Says you're all a bunch of hypocritical people. No, perhaps what is worse is that he will make you realize that's what you are! Because he's got to be good at talking, too! He's not going to act on anger or be stunned in fear.

So, now you have someone who's not only digging into your evil deeds, someone who's capable, who's not easy to persuade, but also someone with high emotional intelligence who can play the same role as you do, of being a noble, accepted gentlemen with immaculate manners, of very high literacy and outdo you. Because this guy knows very well how society works, he can comprehend social cues perhaps better than you can. He can use your own polite words and nature against you.

It's precisely because of this he must be killed. Perhaps, in every world, Wei Wuxian will end up being the victim. It's only that in MDZS, these were the particular circumstances, and those were the particular excuses.

My personal take is: sometimes it is good to be a centrist, and hold everyone's better intentions in mind. most of the times it might not be, as there are many conflicting systems in place that allow for true victims who are stuck. most often, the victims are always the ones who DON'T have a voice, who are brushed over as numbers of corpses, rather than people with stories. most often, kindness is shown in little action that are trampled upon by those who hold true power. most often the people who are good, who are heroes die young, or are hated and ridiculed, for speaking up for the victims. it's not right, and never will be.

if someone like wei wuxian or his presence in the book makes you uncomfortable it might be because you hold the "niceities" and the pleasantries to be of more importance than the issues at hand. just because something is too troublesome doesn't mean it is wrong. if everytime he enters the scene you're scared of what he's going to do next, you should know it's not him who is the problem but the prople who aren't doing anything who are. don't be scared of "trouble-makers." he's not erratic or spontaneous. he has considered society's standards and deemed it useless. why is that that the koi tower scene, where he is in his "yiling laozu, loss of control, threatening" moment is followed immediately by him being extremely kind to Wen qing ? it's not that he's losing control. it's that Jin Zixun wouldn't have acted and told him where the people were without him using intimidation tactics. Wei Wuxian is the one forced into bad corners by the powerful people, where he has to show his edges. Don't end up twisted the narratives. if you bite someone for a while, expect to be hit.

#wei wuxian #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #wangxian #my meta #my thoughts #cultivation world bullshit #my essays #When i first watched the untamed Wei Wuxian made me uncomfortable and scared at times #I felt uncomfortable reading the bits of his YLLZ era #and koi tower scene #ive done some introspection and grown

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