#it's just so raw and pure emotion i love it so much
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joelmillerisapunk ¡ 12 hours ago
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OH MY GOD??? The intensity here is unreal. This fic punches you in the gut and refuses to let go, it’s suffocating in the best way. The tension between the reader and Javier is so raw, so visceral, it feels like you’re standing in the room with them, choking on the unbearable weight of heartbreak and desire. The intricate web of emotions is just chef's kiss—anger, betrayal, obsession, need—it’s all laid bare, tangled in this messy, intoxicating relationship.
The prose is so vivid and detailed that you can practically feel the damp heat of the shower, the sharp sting of the reader’s heartbreak, and the way Javier’s presence overwhelms everything like a tidal wave. The moral ambiguity is written so perfectly—it’s masochistic, it’s destructive, but it’s also undeniably human.
The way the story captures Javier’s complexity—his arrogance, his fragility—is pure poetry. And the reader’s inner turmoil? That delicate balance of anger and longing, her refusal to let go even when she knows she should? It’s painfully relatable in the best (and worst) way.
The sex isn’t just sex—it’s this volatile, emotional battleground where their love and hate collide. It’s messy, flawed, and oh-so-human. The power dynamics, the desperation, the unspoken confessions buried in every kiss, every thrust—this is messy, it’s painful, it’s addictive. You’ve written something that just lingers with you long after reading. Freckles!!!! You’ve wrecked me, and I’m thanking you for it. Honestly, I need a cigarette (I don't smoke), a drink, and maybe therapy after this. Some of my fave lines cause the entire thing is my favorite <3
You think you're so mysterious and complicated?! Well,  news flash, I've seen plenty like you. You’re just another man. You're not even that, you're a child. A child who's afraid of his own shadow when it comes to relationship Raven, angry and fearful. He knows you can read him like an open book and this unleashes an awareness upon him that crushes him to the ground. His voice sounded softer when he talked about you. You lulled yourself into that feeling You allowed yourself to hide it in a part of your brain where you never looked-that was a mistake. Making the hunch barely a firefly when it was supposed to be a bright neon sign.
Javier approaches, bending slightly to reach your mouth, his mustache brushes against your cupid’s bow and you don't even have the strength to turn your face away anymore. 
When your lips collide you let it happen. It’s like when you drink too much Tequila. It burns on your tongue, leaving you almost anesthetized as soon as you down it, and then an aromatic taste wafts into your mouth; it is lysergic, unusual, unmistakable. You love it, so you keep doing it.
Javier is the same. He's sharp, stiff at the edges, burns like fire, but he has an aura that you won’t mistake for anything and he hypnotizes you. He’s not like anyone else, despite what you told him. There is an underlying despair in him, a cry dying in his throat, “How can you love someone like me?” He says it only with his eyes but you hear it clearly.
Just put it in there. You think. I just need to feel your flesh against mine, inside me, claiming me like the rag doll that I am now. Stupid bitch trying to have you when you’re damaged like a shattered glass, when you can bring nothing than heat to my body and freezing ice to my heart You come, weeping. Grasping to him like your last shred of hope.But there’s no hope anymore. You know you can’t go on like that.
You leave him there, wondering, lost as he makes you feel. There will be two broken hearts.  You wait for the elevator, still hoping to see his ruffled raven hair poking out the door, his voice calling to you, his hand tightening on your wrist. None of this happens. The only ones who will follow you are your ghosts.
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How could you love somebody like me?
Pairing: f!reader x Javier Peña Words count: 3032 Rating: + 18, NSFW, MDNI. Summary: Javi is under protection and has asked you to join him in the hotel room where he is confined. When you discover his secrets and lies, however, that room will become too small. Too small for both of you. Tags/warnings: POV second person, no use of y/n, Javi is still a DEA agent but it's a modern setting so the man has a smartphone. Reader is described having female genitalia and breasts, no other description of her is given, she doesn't blush and her hair is not described. Mention of alcohol, mention of cheating, Javi is a cheater, no happy ending, we will go through the man's phone (you're not supposed to do that but I never said my reader could do no wrong, right?), use of pet names (gatita which means kitten in Spanish, baby, darling), smut, angry sex, unprotected p in v (do better irl), cream pie, of course a little nipple play ‘cause it’s still my fic, toxic relationship, self doubt, mention of Steve, a huge pile of lies, Javi is bad at feelings, some reader’s thoughts marked in italics. I think it's all, let me know if I forgot something and I'll add it right away. A/N: Written for @jolapeno 's "Dear-uary" challenge. This was my prompt, I struggled a little bit at first but I ended up having a blast writing this ❤︎ Heavily inspired by this song (from which the fic also takes its title), I heard it randomly on Spotify one day and I thought "wait, this is perfect for Javi!" and I ended up being obsessed with two more songs by the same artist. LOL Many thanks to: - @aurorawritestoescape , my beta, for her help and advice, she will probably dream of elephants because of me tonight hahaha Kate I own you a big one, thanks baby so much, I love you ❤️ - The person who basically pulled this out of my brain and supported me throughout the process, my precious, my peanut @joelmillerisapunk. 🥰 Love you so much it's ridiculous🥹 - @milla-frenchy for letting me blather about this thing some days ago. Love you, bb ❤︎ English is not my first language, every single mistake is still on me, I deeply apologize if you find any.
Edited - because I forgot to change the most important detail, of course. I’m not myself if I’m not doing a mess. Yay. It’s okay now.
“Why the hell am I here? Was I the only available hole this week?”
“No,” he whispers. 
“So what?” 
Javier came back and found you in the middle of the room.
You were brandishing his phone like a sword in the air, the banner of everything that was wrong.
His face went pale when he saw you like that. 
Eyes wide open. 
Mouth agape. 
He tried to say something but you immediately hit him with a vomit of words.
“I know what you’re doing,” you hiss under your breath, feeling your eyes sting.
Javier is a marble statue in front of you, his lips pressed together, his absent eyes not even looking at you, staring at a spot behind your shoulders, his arms abandoned along his sides. 
He seems anchored to the ground. 
His last words to you still burn on your skin like a fire you cannot extinguish.
A heavy silence between you fills the air of the room and makes it unbreathable. 
“Fuck, Javier, talk to me,” you whisper angrily.
You clutch his phone in your hands, so tightly that your knuckles are white from exertion, as if you were clinging to it to keep yourself from falling off a cliff. 
“You knew I was no good,” he says sternly.
You have been in this room for two days. 
Officially, Javier has to stay here because henchmen of one of the new drug lords in town are set on taking him out. 
Unofficially, he has you infiltrating the room. 
Typical Javier, spending his time under protection fucking someone. 
You foolishly almost believed it was romantic, until this morning. 
“So you’re trying to say that it’s my fault? Is that what you want to say? It’s my fault that as soon as I turn my back you go and stick your cock in someone else's pussy?” You don’t even have the strength to scream right now. Your voice comes out rancorous but low, hoarse, like a blown growl. 
Oh, you’re not going to accept being lectured by him, fuck no.
“No, I’m just saying -” he tries to explain and you glare at him, making the words die in his mouth.  
"What?" 
“Fuck, I'll never change,” he shrugs as if it were a truism that only you can't grasp.
His eyes shift to the ground, dull and absent.
“You don't change because you are convinced that you can't,” you admonish him, feeling anger rising from your chest. 
"That's not true," he murmurs, keeping his gaze on the crimson and gold carpet that lies at your feet.
“Yes, it is,” you insist, ”and you seem to like to think of yourself as an incurable asshole.”
He still fails to see the real problem, the elephant in the room that lives and thrives among you. 
"Then you tell me, if you think you know me so well,” he asks with defiance. 
“You bet I fucking know you,” you lash out. “You think you're so mysterious and complicated?! Well,  news flash, I've seen plenty like you. You’re just another man. You're not even that, you're a child. A child who's afraid of his own shadow when it comes to relationships.”
“Don’t fucking analyze me,” he hisses, finally setting his eyes back on you. 
Raven, angry and fearful. He knows you can read him like an open book and this unleashes an awareness upon him that crushes him to the ground.
You bitterly laugh, “Truth hurts, huh? I know something about it”. 
The wrinkle between his eyebrows deepens, his nostrils flare, and his mouth tightens into a line so thin you think he’s about to burst. He stays quiet instead, eyes back on the damask carpet decoration. 
_____________
“Yes, Steve, I'm fine. That jerk won't find me here, and anyway it's full of police outside the door.” 
A pause and a sigh. 
”No, no one followed her, they don't know who she is.”
You stood behind the half-closed bathroom door listening. 
You smiled. 
His voice sounded softer when he talked about you. You lulled yourself into that feeling. 
Until you heard something else. 
A booming laugh. 
Water ran in the shower, tiny droplets coated the wall as the mirror fogged up.
“Whatever. Of course I'm still screwing around. At least, I was doing it before that asshole started chasing me,” his voice suddenly lowered so you took a chance and opened the door a little more. You wanted to make sure you heard right. 
Your hand trembled against the doorknob, you grabbed your wrist to hold it steady. 
“You idiot,” he scoffed. “Yeah, we'll be in touch.”
Suspicion. The black wing of a crow that had been wrapped around your heart for a long time.
But then why did it hurt so much? 
You allowed yourself to hide it in a part of your brain where you never looked-that was a mistake. Making the hunch barely a firefly when it was supposed to be a bright neon sign.
He always places the phone with its screen down when you go out to dinner, softly smiling at it when he checks it after a few vibrations, telling you “it’s Steve” when you ask. 
But you know that crooked smile. 
He dodges when you ask him about his day "oh work, you know, just work." 
He tells you he is with Steve but you hear female voices in the background. 
Every time you try to confront him it always ends the same way, him telling you, “you’re paranoid, there’s no one else, just you, baby. You’re the only one I want.”
And then he fucks your doubts into oblivion.
You heard the thud of the phone on the blankets. And then Javier calling you. 
You swallowed the gall rising from the walls of your stomach and just smiled when he joined you in the bathroom and suggested that you shower together.
You wanted some proof before you charged him. 
If there was anything you had learned from being with him, it was that hard evidence was the key. So you played cool. 
He fucked you against the shower wall and you moaned into his neck. 
He licked your pussy like a man starved and you just bit your lips until you felt iron on your tongue.
He kissed you with that liar's mouth, and you let him.
And you fell asleep beside him, on the unmade bed of your uncertainties. 
This morning someone from outside called him into the hallway to report the latest movements of the guy who was looking for him. 
His phone was on the bedside table.
It was like a magnet, pulling your hand to it.
You were almost sure you knew his unlock code ‘cause you had watched the movements of his finger many times. 
You tried twice without success. 
The third time you let out a long sigh, visualized in your mind the movement one more time and unlocked it. 
You were in. 
Your heart was beating wildly in your chest as your fingers swiped and clicked on the screen. 
And there they were.
Dozens and dozens of messages and pics exchanged with 4 different women.
You scrolled through one of the chats with a certain Maria, who regularly sent him pictures of her tits and her legs spread wide, her pussy in the shot.
There was sexting, arranged dates, same promises he gave to you, things you never asked for but he kept repeating like a broken record. Even the same pet name. Gatita. 
Blood simmered in your veins, a jolt in your heart, throat dry. 
Your finger furiously scrolled through the chat, finding tons of messages he had sent her while he was with you.
You switched to another one and you found pretty much the same. And yet another, message after message containing flirting and explicit sex.  
“Oh Javi, you keep getting better and better with that cock of yours”
“My pussy needs you, darling, can you come over?”
“I can’t stop thinking about your huge cock dripping on me”
And the more you scrolled, the more a question formed in your brain, rumbling through your temples like a deafening drum. 
Was he ever sincere with you?
________
When he looks up at you again, you see it. A veil of fragility in the dense blackness of his gaze.
He looks almost helpless. “I know you tried,” he admits, ”You tried harder than anyone else.”
“Apparently it was no use,” you chastise him.
He doesn’t reply. 
Instead he comes closer and closer. 
You pull back, responding to his every step forward with a backward one. 
“Please,” he whispers. 
“No.” 
“Don't do that.”
“You have no right to tell me what to do,” you bark.
”I know...” 
“Fuck off, Javier, leave me alone.”
You pull back until you hit the wall behind you. 
Javier approaches, bending slightly to reach your mouth, his mustache brushes against your cupid’s bow and you don't even have the strength to turn your face away anymore. 
When your lips collide you let it happen. 
It’s like when you drink too much Tequila. 
It burns on your tongue, leaving you almost anesthetized as soon as you down it, and then an aromatic taste wafts into your mouth; it is lysergic, unusual, unmistakable.
You love it, so you keep doing it.
Javier is the same. 
He's sharp, stiff at the edges, burns like fire, but he has an aura that you won’t mistake for anything and he hypnotizes you. He’s not like anyone else, despite what you told him. There is an underlying despair in him, a cry dying in his throat, “How can you love someone like me?” 
He says it only with his eyes but you hear it clearly.
He is a time bomb that explodes in your heart every time he touches you. So you keep doing it.
“Fuck,” you whisper against his lips. 
“Yeah…I know. I’m not worthy.”
And yet, you’re still here.
You let him peel off your every layer of clothing, to leave you naked and vulnerable in front of him. 
You do nothing when he undresses too. Hastily taking off his shirt, fumbling with the button of his jeans, nervous hands and short breaths.
It is like some mind fuck game, intoxicating, dangerous, capable of leaving permanent marks.
He lowers his jeans just enough to free his cock, no boxers. Always ready.
His hands run over your hips and you groan. 
His tongue slides over your neck, his eyes closed, his breath heavy and warm on your skin. 
He makes you cry, but you don't say no.
His lips latch onto your nipple and adrenaline rushes through your veins up into your head, hitting hard like a jackhammer.
You don’t pull back anymore, you push your tit into his mouth so eagerly you feel his teeth closing on your bud and you whine in pleasure. 
His growing erection leaks against your center. You are trapped. Not so much because you are between him and the wall but because you no longer know how to get him out of your head. 
Right now it doesn't matter how much it hurts. 
He slides his hands down your thighs and you know what he wants, without needing to speak. You wrap your legs around his waist. He kneels on the bed with you still clinging to him, you lie back on the soft blankets that smell of you both, arch your back and press against his cock. You folds splayed and dripping for him.
His fingers go up your rib cage, stop under your breasts and grasp there, he draws you back to him and your mouths collide again.
You let his tongue enter. You let the fleeting pleasure of this instant take over all the no's you know you have to say.
There’s no right kind of love here, this room is drowned in angry sex.
Angry at how you can never say no to him, angry at how he makes you feel, angry because you know that no one has ever fucked you the way he did, invading your body with a pleasure so addictive that it makes you sick. Angry because maybe he's right, he can't change. 
You break the kiss and bite on his shoulder, a small act of revenge that really does no harm compared to your bleeding heart. 
Your hands grasp on the golden skin of his back, leaving marks with your nails digging into it, your miserable attempt to leave marks on him in return.
You moan convulsively under his touch, your mouth wide open against his, your tongue desperately seeking him out. 
His hands tighten on your ass, lifting you slightly, his cock slides over your wet opening, a guttural sound comes out of the back of your throat without you being able to hold it back. 
You want him inside you. 
You need him inside you.
And it’s wrong, and desperate. It’s masochistic.
You don’t even care for his jeans’s zip scraping your skin.
The thin line between pain and pleasure is so blurred now.
It’s a pathetic shit show of need and urgency. 
You��d walk away from any other guy but Javier is the person you can never have just for yourself and at the same time he is the only one you want. 
He is the knife and the wound at the same time.  
When he asks “Whose pussy is this?” in his deep groaning voice that fucks directly with your brain, you can only reply “yours.”
Digging your nails deeper, biting more, wailing louder but just pleading with him.
You take his shaft in your hand and rub it against you in blind desperation, wetting it with your juices. 
He groans into your ears while his hand reaches for your nipple and his big strong arm holds you close.
You are sitting on his thighs, your legs crossed behind his back.
His fingers pinch your nipple as you don't stop stroking his big throbbing cock.
Just put it in there. You think. I just need to feel your flesh against mine, inside me, claiming me like the rag doll that I am now. 
Stupid bitch trying to have you when you’re damaged like a shattered glass, when you can bring nothing than heat to my body and freezing ice to my heart. 
“Fuck me,” you groan. 
He pushes against your core, entering you with one deep thrust.
Your pussy is weeping so much it doesn’t even hurt.
You clench on him with all the strength you have, chocking his cock with your walls.
“Fuck,” he growls. “You’re gripping me so hard, baby. There’s nothing you want more than this, huh? Me fucking you raw?” 
“Shut up,” you hiss. 
He starts moving, pumping into you as his hand reaches for your clit, brushing it in circles.
You whine, clinging onto his back, your face hidden in the crook of his neck.
You can’t look him in the eye, you can’t face your own shameful reflection in his pupils, you can’t think of anything else than this pleasure firing your body, your limbs, your mind.
Your pussy never gets the memo when it comes to him. She just clenches, and cries and asks for more.
At the verge of your brink, when you’re so utterly overwhelmed you could swear, you’re about to jump out of your skin, you hear it.
It’s the softest whisper on your skin, so low you barely catch the words, “I love you” 
You cry a single tear that slides down the column of his neck, it could be mistaken for a bead of sweat so easily and Javier doesn’t notice it. But it’s there. You’re crying again.
You come, weeping.
Grasping to him like your last shred of hope.
But there’s no hope anymore.
You know you can’t go on like that.
You cried before. You argued before. It’s all useless.
A devastating orgasm shoots through you, leaving you without defense.
It’s the last thing you want but you need to get it over with. 
You lie on the bed, feeling his last twitches inside you, his cum dripping onto your walls, his cock pressing against that spot that belongs only to him.
He lies down on you, gently crushing you with his weight, his sweaty skin against yours, the smell of your orgasm filling your nostrils.
You’re hopeless and breathless. 
He's still inside you, like he doesn't want to leave. 
You know you have to. 
Eventually he shifts, lying on the other side of the bed muttering, “god, you really are something else.” He takes the pack of cigarettes from the nightstand and lights one, taking a long drag.
“I'm not enough,” you want to scream looking at him through the cloud of smoke enveloping him. “Or maybe you're not, for me.”
When he is about to fall asleep, you get up. You pick up your clothes off the floor and put them on silently.
“Where are you going, gatita?” he grunts. 
Does he think he has solved it? Does he think you will forgive him as you did the other times? 
You don’t reply.
"You only ever tell me the truth when you think I won't hear it,” you type on your phone and send it to him, before coming out of the door without turning your back.
You leave him there, wondering, lost as he makes you feel.
There will be two broken hearts. 
You know he loves you and you love him.
He is convinced that he doesn’t deserve you and pushes you away every time you get close to his soul. 
He knows that you see him clearly; that scares him.
You are tired of fighting for the both of you.
You push the elevator button under the gaze of an unsuspecting policeman who urges, “Where are you going, miss?”
“I'm leaving.”
“Do you need someone to accompany you?” 
“No, thank you.”
“Someone could follow you,” he counters.
“No one knows me, you don't have to worry.”
You wait for the elevator, still hoping to see his ruffled raven hair poking out the door, his voice calling to you, his hand tightening on your wrist. 
None of this happens.
The only ones who will follow you are your ghosts.
Tag list: @baronessvonglitter , @almostempty , @probablyreadinsmut , @thundermartini , @gothcsz , @cas-readsandwrites , @harriedandharassed
Archive tag: @pedrostories
If you want to be added or removed just let me know! Thank you very much for reading❤︎
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dietlemonadee ¡ 2 years ago
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ok fuck this I'm gonna post this song cuz i cried listening to it and still am
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serotonins-stuff ¡ 4 months ago
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As a boy Katsuki never understood why men cried whenever they saw their bride for the first time.
When it came to his turn to stand at the altar, suited up and slicked back hair,he finally understood why.
His heart is pounding violently against his ribcage, so loud that he can hear it reverberate through his head. His palms were damp, and his gaze stays fixated on the double doers before him. The doors that will soon open to reaveal the love of his life.
His foot meets the floor repeatedly in a tapping motion, and his hands are rough as he shifts his collar side to side. His body litters with goosebumps and involuntary quivers.
He's suddenly grateful for this being a small wedding with only close family and friends. He wouldn't want a large crowd witnessing his nerves get the better of him.
Kirishima smiles though the tears flowing down his face. He's honored to be the best man on his best friends big day, because that means he gets to see the tough Katsuki find pure happiness and put his walls down for the one he loves. If it's enough to make the great lord explosion murdered god dynamite nervous, then it's love that should be cherished.
Katsukis stomach flutters when the pianist begins to play your song.
It's time.
He fiddles with the cuffs of his blazer and submerges the urge to run his hand through his perfectly styled hair.
When he locks eyes with you for the first time that day. It feels as if time itself slowed down. In this moment, every ounce of anxiety he had been carrying fades away. You are radiant under the soft orange glow of the sun, your skin shimmering like a precious diamond. His precious diamond.
His heart dances swiftly against his chest, touching every nerve in his body.
He catches a glimpse of your hands nervously fiddling your dress by your sides and remembers that he isn't alone. You, the love of his life, are sharing the same nervous flutter of butterflies in your stomach.
He begins to see you more clearly as you approach him. The soft glow of your eyes, your perfect lips and curves.
And when he hears his name flow so sweetly from your lips he can't help it. He chokes out a sob, and immediately your hands reach up to gently swipe away his tears.
The audience give a numerous amount of awww's, which cause a smile to tug its way onto his lips.
His glossy eyes stare longingly into yours. "You look beautiful" he whispers.
Saying his vows was the hardest part. He just couldn't stop crying, and the tears wouldn't stop flowing. You were there assuring him and giving him gestures of love. When you started to say your own vows, seeing his redened nose and tear stained face cause tears of your own to flow down your face.
With a gentle yet firm grip his palm finds comfort on the curve of your waist. The minute the officient said you may kiss the bride. Your arms evelop his the soft skin of his neck and your heads tilt to the side as if it's instinct.
This kiss hold a firm yet sweet connection, a silent promise that this love would endure for eternity.
He was finally married to you, his angel, the girl of his dreams. He looked forward to calling you his wife, to starting a family-
Hot tears stream uncontrollably down his face, an explodion of raw emotions he can't contain. His heart swells with overwhelming swarm of love, joy, and deep appreciation, a feeling he once never believed possible.
With a shaky breath, he pulls away softly before resting his forehead on yours. "I love you" he choked "so fuckin much"
You huffed at his cuteness "I love you more Katsuki"
He places one more kiss to your lips, and nuzzles your nose with his.
"Impossible"
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yawnderu ¡ 7 months ago
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Simon’s gut clenched, the pure heartbreak in your eyes lashing at his heart like whips. He choked back tears, swallowing the thick lump in his throat to keep himself from falling at your feet and begging to be forgiven. Deep inside, he knows it’s selfish to keep you with him. 
“‘M sorry.” His first confession is nearly muted by the traumatized, war-hardened soldier deep within his soul. 
“I’m so sorry. I asked for the leave, but bloody Makarov just…” He pauses, realizing that no matter how many excuses he comes up with, his mistake will never be forgiven. It doesn’t deserve any forgiveness, and that’s something he’s fully aware of, gnawing at his conscience from within. 
“I love you. I love both of you. I promise— no, I swear, that I won’t ever leave.” His gaze drifts down to the newborn baby in your arms. A tiny sweet girl, her big brown eyes looking at him with so much curiosity and love. For a second, it takes every ounce of strength for him not to reach out and hold her. 
Simon clenches his fists tightly, as if holding back the tide of emotions surging within him. The last thing he wanted was to be like his father— an absent bloody cunt, yet it seems like the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree no matter how much he tries.
The sight of the tears rolling down your cheeks feels like daggers straight to his soul, and yet a part of him thinks he’s not allowed to feel pain. Not when he let you be alone and scared in the delivery room, surrounded by nurses sporting expressions of pure pity for you. A first-time mother who kept insisting her husband was going to show up this one time. 
“I was so scared, Simon.” The first words you’ve told him the entire night hurt more than any bullet he’s ever taken. 
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so fucking sorry.” He swallows the thick lump in his throat, hesitantly reaching out to brush the tears from your cheeks, his hands shaky. His dark eyes fix on your face, soaking you in, wanting to remember even the smallest detail. As exhausted as you are, you’re still the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on. 
“Let me make it right. I promise I’ll do everything to make up for it.” A grim part of his soul knows that this is just one of the many cracks in your marriage that will never be repaired. Still, the sincerity in his voice echoes in the room as he leans forward, pressing your foreheads together. 
“I can’t imagine how you felt, baby. How scared you must’ve been…” He whispers, his chest constricting. His gaze drifts down to your beautiful girl, tears brimming his eyes the moment her tiny hand reaches out to hold one of the straps from his gear. 
“I’m here now. I’ll never leave, I promise.” If finally hanging it up is what it takes to amend your marriage, he’ll do it. A small smile pulls at the corners of his lips, picturing being able to see his little girl grow up with the chances he never had, and despite knowing that he deserves the rawness of the moment, Simon makes it a life goal to be with you at all times. To fix everything he once broke.
From the ex-husband Simon series.
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supernaturallyliterate ¡ 2 days ago
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Oh I didn’t notice this parallel! I think it also shows Blitzø’s growth and shifting perception of love, friendship, and relationships.
With Fizz, he still equates love with sexual love and physical intimacy. He doesn’t know how to tell Fizz that he loves and cares for him. (And even if Blitzø did have a crush on Fizz as a kid, it’s been 15 years of being enemies and Blitzø is in a situationship with Stolas, not to mention Fizz is with Ozzie.) I don’t think that Blitzø truly wanted physical and romantic intimacy with Fizz in this moment of reconnection. Rather, it’s the only form of love that he has allowed himself to accept. So instead of saying, “I missed you. I love you (as a friend). I’m glad that we reconnected and realized everything was a huge misunderstanding.” He defaults to “would it ruin the moment if we made out right now?” Because it’s how he knows to communicate love. (He does the same thing with Millie and Moxxie until Ghostfuckers in Season 2.)
But with Stolas. He’s not expecting a kiss. Sure, he’s got the hero smirk in the first still, but when Stolas goes in for that huge smooch, Blitzø is surprised! And I think he’s so surprised because it’s so different than their Full Moon kisses or the time they made out when Stolas saved I.M.P. from the human government. Those were sexual kisses. This moment at Stolas’s old house is a very romantic, emotional, overjoyed kiss. It’s raw. It’s unfiltered. There’s no sexual intent or undertone, or expectation of more. It’s pure, it’s a bold declaration of “I love you!” Just like Blitzø cutting that ice dragon’s head off and rescuing Stolas was.
Plus, Blitzø has come to accept that love comes in many forms, including sexual, romantic, and platonic. He accepts love, period. That he is worthy of love.
And I just love this development so much.
I feel like not enough people are making this Oops vs. Sinsmas comparison...
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Versus:
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If we need any more proof of these two being two halves of one whole lovable idiot...
(Further proof of why he likes Stolas if you ask me).
93 notes ¡ View notes
hoseoksluna ¡ 11 months ago
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LIQUID STARS | jjk
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pairing: fuck buddy!jungkook x f. reader (feat. bam)
genre: angst, smut
word count: 11.8k
summary: to seal the deal, you give jungkook what he wants—your kiss, your cunt and your virginity.
playlist: liquid stars / pinterest board: wine
warnings: size kink, heavy dd/lg themes, provocation, dry humping, dirty talk, mentions of porn, oral sex (f. + m. receiving), multiple orgasms & countdown, dom/sub dynamics, reader has daddy issues (like the writer), first time, jealousy, inner child healing, plushie used during intercourse, jungkook fucks her numb & dumb, praise kink, cum eating, pet names and the establishment of a title, bondage, raw sex, tummy bulge, desperation, pain felt during intercourse, squirting
note: as difficult as it was to write this, i'm immensely thankful. this changed my life; it healed me and i'll dream about it for a long, long time. i was as exhausted as oc once i finished this, because i truly did give my all. everyone, this is part four to my series 'wine' and therefore the very end. this is the very beginning of jungkook's and oc's relationship. can be read as a standalone as there aren't any quirks from the other parts (except for bunny), though if you wish to read them now, now is the perfect time. now you can see the beautiful gradual development of their relationship. please, enjoy as you read and let me know your favorite parts bc i need to talk about this. heed the warnings as there are dd/lg themes that can be uncomfortable for some. thank you! and thank you for all the love on this series. i'll never forget it. i love you, guys. ʚɞ
side note: give some round of applause for 3D daddy provider jungkook everyone!! he deserves it!!!
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Silky lilac bows adorn the tops of your pigtails that cascade down in loose braids, sprawled on the cotton of his pillow and on the soft belly of a bunny plushie. There are still traces of sunlight left on the bedding, which dissolve, little by little, into nothingness as the large star goes down, saying goodbye. It’s lightweight, the atmosphere—homely almost. And much to your surprise, you feel relatively at ease, despite the fact a man lies on top of you—a man you have a certain liking for. 
It was natural for you to end up here and you, yourself, wished for it, even. Deemed it was only right after the man took you around for a walk while his silly Doberman guarded each and every step both of you had taken in sync, especially so when he persisted in buying you a small plastic ring of the same bunny you’re lying against. He didn’t even forget about his own canine friend waiting outside patiently like the obedient dog he is, and fed him the snackies he got for him as soon as he returned from the shop. You swore Bam was as giddy as you when he received his gift. 
Now the ring glints in the last rays of the sun. His, too. 
While yours is as white as the cloudy morning sky, Jungkook’s is as black as the drowsily dozing night sky. You think it’s the perfect contrast between the pair of you. Not that you should be noting these things, considering you’re just friends. But his skin is satiny soft, painted in impressionist tattoos, while his muscles, that his well-fitted T-shirt graciously allows you to see, are strong. You’re sure he could just lift you and throw you around without much of a strain. And it certainly doesn’t help that he’s such a striking image of pure beauty. How could you not notice these intertwinings when they’re this lovely?
You like him—without a shadow of doubt. Can feel the call of an emotional attachment forming the more he studies your skin with the tip of his index finger, embellished with the Miffy ring, and it’s owed to the fact you’ve never been touched this way before. No one has ever come this close, no one has ever been interested in the moles scattered upon your shoulders, in the veins that make the pathway to the column of your neck. No one has ever gazed twice at them—but Jungkook?
He hasn’t stopped looking at them ever since he laid you down in the middle of his bed. 
How could you stop such a call? Such a lull, such a magnetic pull. You know you should, but for the meantime, you simply don’t want to. Can’t lose this moment, can’t lose this once in a lifetime opportunity—
Jungkook presses his lips against the prominent mole in the center of your left shoulder. Those pretty, puffy lips, closing against your skin, the smallest dart of tongue swiping past. It shocks you for a moment before the feeling dissolves beneath, adjusting within the freshness of your system. How could you refuse such dynamic poetry, expressed against your own forlorn body? When it’s so blatant that it’s natural, that your body willingly accepts it without a fight. 
You couldn’t. 
Stretching your fingers between the thick strands of his hair, you close your eyes to savor the feeling of being wanted. The movement of his mouth, going even as far as to the first vein rooted in your arm—following it with those half-closed pillows. Up, up until he finds the line of your collarbone. Jungkook pauses there, simply breathes against you before he interperses little pecks there, nibbles and gentle swipes of tongue. The lining of your top won’t let him go further down, so he changes direction—relies on the pathway of your veins to guide him to your neck. And there… at the first contact, you grip the roots of his hair. 
His kisses and nibbles are much harder here. And what’s worse, he takes the sensitive skin into his mouth and sucks. You fail at containing the whimpers that break out of your mouth and Jungkook reacts to them. Hums ever so deeply, rocks his hips against the mattress. You wish you were a bit bigger so you could feel the collision, but you’re just so small compared to his large form. You imagine he’s writing down the poems collecting inside of him with each cursive roll of his tongue. Wonder if there’s enough paper on your skin for all his words. 
“You sweet little thing,” Jungkook coos onto the crook of your neck, dragging his lips up and down before he stops at your jaw. You feel the warmth of his breath and his body heat seeps into yours, creating unity, blackening the ink. It feels strange, it feels so new. Brisk and springlike, like fresh air in a stuffed room. You want to stay here for a long time, tasting the wholeness of spring captured in him. You want his words to flush you red with the tinge of the entire sunlight that opens the buds of flowers during all seasons in a loop. “Can I kiss you?”
You haven’t gone beyond the innocent touching of hands with him. You brim with a tight feeling of thankfulness that he asked you such a graceful question, although something else steals your attention entirely. 
“Little?” you say, the smile on your lips pulled so taut that it quivers ever so slightly. It makes you crazy that he calls you that, but you play the game. Revel in it. “What do you mean little? I’m bigger than you.”
Jungkook cocks his brow at you, mouth falling into a lopsided grin. He sits back and you feel a whiff of coldness pass by the perimeter of your body, as if someone opened the window and let the winter air in, when it’s just his brief distance that caused it. The forming attachment in you tenses and before you can think about your actions, your hand finds his knee, his thigh and traces slow patterns there. Jungkook suddenly squeezes your waist, surprising you, and the ecstatic fluttering of butterfly wings break havoc all over your body. The solidness of his hands, their weight, their firmness, giving life to your body, meaning. You note how his fingers touch when he has his hands enveloped around you like that. And the inkling that your body matters in his hands like that slips into your mind, spreading through its axis. 
You bite your lower lip. A small ache begins to grow in your intimate parts. It’s so nice to be wanted, to be considered good enough to be touched, to be kissed. 
“You? Bigger than me?” Jungkook squeezes your waist again. Sucks in a breath through his teeth. Smiles softly; in a way that you find unbearably endearing. “No, you’re just little. Just a tiny, little bug. So tiny in my hands.” 
For the breath he inhaled, you exhale it. 
He leaves his hands there when he bends over you, hovering his lips over yours. His weight, his heat. You sigh against him in relief, in a newly blossoming excitement that he’s back again. You spread your legs wider, feet grazing his calves—
“Let me kiss you, please.” 
You’d give in, but the game is just so pleasurable. 
Your laugh is but a breath. “You wanna kiss me?” 
You exhaled, he inhaled. 
“Don’t ask stupid questions.”
“Since when do friends kiss?” You cock your eyebrow at him just like he did, prodding your tongue on the inside of your cheek. 
He hovers a little bit higher above you, hanging his head in defeat, sighing. Places his hands in fists on either side of you, caging you in. 
“Premium friends do,” he mutters, lifting his head, face all serious. You dig your toe into the toned muscle of his thigh, twirling sweet little circles, gliding up and down. Watch as his eyes lid and he tries to control it. “Don’t do that or I’ll fuck you.” 
Your body panics, but you will it to relax. 
“Does that come with the premium subscription?” 
Jungkook purses his lips, supports his weight on one hand as the other, the tattooed one, grips your jaw. He squishes your cheeks, bites his lip once—seemingly ponders whether he should play your game or not before he lets go of your pout, but still keeps his hand there. He traces the shape of your lips with this thumb, feeding his desire to kiss you with scraps. 
“Yes,” he utters. “Kisses, orgasms, my dog. It’s all—”
Orgasms, not just sex. Orgasms. 
“I get to take Bam?” 
Jungkook tuts at you. “You get to take me,” he corrects you. “Though, can even such a little thing like you take me?” 
Probably not. Definitely not. 
“But what about Bam?” 
He looks at you as if he couldn’t believe the words you’re saying, turning his head slightly to hear you better. Then, he scoffs, running his tongue across his lips swiftly, letting them express the enjoyment of your provocation by stretching into a smirk. He places his hand back on the right side of you, thinking over his words. 
“Bam is mine, but you can pet him. You can kiss him.” You can hear the feigned venom in that word as he spits it and you grin, pleased with yourself. You enjoy doing this to him. “And if you’re good, I’ll let you take him out for his walkies.” 
You gasp slowly, fingers absentmindedly gripping his thigh. Butterflies buzz you with a mere hint of arousal and to convey it, you wet your top lip with the tip of your tongue. The dominance, the principle of proving to him whether you’re deserving of something. Your heartbeat quickens, reaching for him with each swell. 
Oh, you’ll be good. You’ll be good until he’s sick of it. 
It seems he’s as pleased with himself as you were with yourself, reading your body language as he beams down at you, dimples poking holes in his cheeks. You want to stick your fingers there, pinch the skin at the corners of his mouth. Feel them, kiss them—
“Deal.” 
Jungkook blinks at you. He most likely expected you to be difficult. You like the look of surprise on him. A sweet kind of glint perches itself upon his irises. You’re at awe of how he manages to be so adorable and alluring at the same time. You could never understand it. You deem he must be otherworldly. 
“A kiss to seal the deal?” he tries, raising his brows, lowering himself to his elbows. 
He skims his lips across your cheek, descending to your neck. Places one, singular kiss there. Lifts his head to hear your answer, a soft curtain of hair falling across his forehead. 
You make a face as if you’re thinking about it. 
Jungkook groans. 
It’s cold, the way he turns away from you and it startles you—but then he slides his hands under your back and lifts you with ease, sitting you down on his lap. He moves you from the muscles on his thighs to the hardness of his intimate parts and you groan at the feeling of it. You’re wearing an airy short skirt with tights and knee socks underneath, the barrier so thin that you feel the solid, thick shape of him right under your femininity. 
You rock against him once. Jungkook lets out a sound akin to yours, fingers flexing—hands almost reaching for your behind before he decides against it and keeps them planted against your back. 
He desires your consent. And that makes you feel light-headed. Tipsy on the wholeness of him, on the pleasure coursing through your body. 
You rock your hips again—and this time, Jungkook whimpers. 
You take your hands and, slowly, you make a pathway down his chiseled chest. He twitches against you when your fingers pass by his nipples, his body following and squirming along. And once you reach the definition of his abdomen, your hands rise and fall against its quickening movement as his lungs heave. You’re mesmerized by his reaction to your touch. It’s as if it was his first time as well and something about that makes you woozy, savage and absolutely feline. 
And something about the way you’re allowed to do as you please, whereas he’s not, strengthens that state of mind, enriches it, thoroughly worsens it. 
You want him. 
It began with a ring and ended right here. 
And the process of your decision starts at his hips, finalizes at the pebbles of his nipples and finishes completely at the sides of his neck. He gives you the same, if not better, reaction, his manhood moving against you, and it’s settled. 
The giving of virginity to seal the deal, not just a kiss. 
Hovering your lips against his, you slip your hand to the place where you’re connected to feel up the shape of him. You moan onto him, vigorous power seizing you, propelling you to wrap your fingers around him. The breaths Jungkook emits are desperate, tortured, wafting over you, intoxicating you. It fills you with confidence unlike any other that you’re able to coax such a thing of beauty out of him—that you, the artist, have the upper hand momentarily while he doesn’t. 
And he waits, depends on you. You want to cry due to how happy it makes you, due to the way it suffuses an empty part of you, left abandoned by someone who should’ve taken care of it a long, long time ago. 
Because of that—if it’s kisses that he wants, you’ll give him as many as his body desires as a thank you. 
“You’re so hard against me,” you whisper. 
Jungkook grips your waist hard. 
“If you want it, you have to seal the deal,” he mimics your intonation, voice deep, tingling your tummy. 
“I want it.” You clutch both of your hands on his jawline, thumbs finding the invisible dimples. 
“Kiss me, then.” 
You whimper at the longing to do so. Your tummy clenches, butterflies inside swarm around and—
When you close your lips against his top lip, they burst into smithereens. Jungkook sighs in relief, enveloping you in his warmth. 
The kiss is hungry. You expected his first taste of you to be careful, contemplative, but he goes all in. Takes charge of the lip lock, swallowing you whole, moving against you, uttering low sounds that make your head spin and you just comply. Accept that you’re the one who submits to his craving and you find yourself liking it; find yourself wanting to deepen your submission. 
You wrap your legs around his waist, your head tilted as you reciprocate all of those hard kisses. When he comes up for air, he just gazes down at you, out of breath. One hand still on your back, the other cradles your cheek. There’s something puzzling in his eyes, as if he was fighting something within. You’re radiated by that energy, heavied down by it, letting him pet you like a puppy while you wait for the next step. 
“You’re so good that I’m considering letting you take Bam out,” he breathes, curling a wisp of your hair behind your ear. “Sweet little thing.” 
He pecks you once. You grind against his manhood and as he shortly groans onto your mouth, you splutter into giggles. Behind you, as if he heard him, the dog peeks his head out of the door, giving his Daddy a questioning look. Jungkook chuckles. 
“Bam, house.” 
The dog leaves and Jungkook sinks his fingers into your hair, sighing. Kisses you, again without tongue—only does what you’ve allowed him, but you overflow with the desire for more. He’s so considerate, so respectful and while you’re grateful for it, you want to break it. Your trust in him, made whole by all that he’s done for you, settled within you, made a bed in the sensitive parts of you that now shine. He doesn’t need to remain there—you want to go beyond that. 
“Touch me, please.” You look up into his eyes as you say it, willing them to see with all your energy how much you want him. 
He rubs soothing circles on your back. “If I touch you, I’ll fuck you, sweetheart.” 
You lift your butt ever so slightly and bounce down on him, your skirt furling. Jungkook moans, pleasing you to the core. It’s bratty of you, but it serves him right for being so stubborn, so firm in his control. You want to break him. 
“Can’t you see how much I want that?” you purr, bunching the cotton of his T-shirt in your fists. 
He merely shakes his head, licking his lower lip, fucking with you. He tugs on one of your braided pigtail, the other hand gliding to your hipbone. “This little girl is horny? I couldn’t tell.” 
A yellow light, sleepy in nature, spills through the blinds, latching onto the side of your neck. His eyes flick to it and his teeth sink into the wetness of his lip. He looks back at you when he says, “what was it that made you horny? The neck kisses?” 
He straps both of his hands to your hipbones now, adjusting you so your sweetest spot rests against his cock, rocking your hips like he wants them to. He swallows down his noises, makes room for yours. You figure he wants to hear them. 
You think about what made you horny. His respectful behavior. An electric spark spasms in your core at the memory and you roll your body against his at the impact—nipples pebbled, grazing below the hardness of his pecks. You moan loudly. He breathes heavily, can’t for the life of him contain that, gripping you with strength that will surely leave bruises. You add it to the list. 
His control—the momentary, delicious lack of it, too. The dominance that follows it. His noises and how unrestrained he is when it comes to them. The allure and the attractive charm of his looks, blended with that insufferable cutesiness. His hard cock. The neck kisses, too, of course. 
You summarize your answer and you tell him, “you.” 
A hitch in his throat. “Fuck.” 
Fuck, indeed. Fuck the steady rhythm—Jungkook speeds up your movement, the pace so fast your pigtails and your ribbons bounce, tits following suit. Your breath falls in step, moans echo within the walls of his room. He kisses you harshly, but that doesn’t silence you. He swallows your noises down, grunting. 
“You wanna know what made me hard for you?” 
You nod your head, lips forming a natural pout at the loss of contact. 
“Those fucking pigtails of yours. The knee socks. How tiny you are in my hands. Seeing you lose your fucking mind when I kissed your neck. Those marks I left behind, hm, fuck yes. Those marks made me crazy,” he mutters, staring you down. “And you know what else?” 
You wait for his answer as white flashes blind you, your roaring orgasm beckoning you close. He doesn’t stop rocking you against him, not once. Fills your brain with emptiness with his words coated wet by his dominant energy. You feel your own wetness soaking the fabric of your panties. 
“Your brattiness,” he says. “I want to fuck it out of you and make a good girl out of you that won’t misbehave again with her smart words.” 
A faint part of you, half affected by the pleasure he gives you, arises to stand up for you. “But I was good and you said so.” 
He clicks his tongue, disapprovingly shaking his head. Slows down the pace so you’re able to hear him loud and clear, your orgasm backing away. “You see the thing is with little bratty girls like you, even when they act good for me, there’s still that dark little side of them that hides. Unless I fuck it out of them, they play with me. And trust me, I like the game until I don’t.” 
You frown at him, but a moan betrays you. A fight throngs inside of you, his dominance yet again permeating you, causing you to flourish, but on the other hand, you don’t like being added to the mix. You want to be the only one—and it makes you angry that he had someone like you before you, that he even said it altogether. Though unfortunately, that’s something you can only keep to yourself. 
The forming attachment breaks, splitting into two, with the knowledge that your wish is futile. You understand he said it for the sake of the role-play that you both naturally, wordlessly established through sexual attraction, but you still have a lot of getting used to within the dynamic. He’s experienced, you’re not. Though, when you think about it, he doesn’t know a thing about your purity. You never told him. 
You blame yourself for your own pain. It’s your fault—you should’ve had a conversation with him about it before you let him do anything to you, instead of playing flirty games with him. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt, if he knew you were a virgin. The thought of what you’ve done stains you, makes you feel filthy, but you will it to kneel inside of you like a wounded animal. You need to be strong if you don’t want to storm out of his room in tears. 
No attachment, no liking. 
Just sex. 
There’s still a frown to your face, despite the fact you set yourself free with your decision. Jungkook chuckles at it, oblivious to your internal storm. 
“You didn’t like that, did you?” You didn’t like being compared to other girls he’d been with; there’s nothing to be said of the like about the role-play aspect. Being called bratty did rouse a moan out of you. “You prove my words right.” 
You roll your eyes. Jungkook grips your ass hard and spanks you. As the sting reverberates, along with it comes the realization you got what you wanted. 
You broke him. 
And now you have to face the repercussions. 
Good thing you’ve sobered up from the stupefaction of your arousal. 
You cradle his face and kiss him deeply in effort to change the narrative. No feeling of affection from earlier hangs upon your heart and you find that it’s easier like this. No strings, no pain. It relieves you—so much that you sense a layer of lightness to your body and tiny, manageable tears well in your eyes. You get to enjoy this after all. 
There’s radiance to your eyes, rooted in hope, and true softness to your words when you say, “I want you to fuck it out of me. I want you to be my first.” 
You want to be different—your pride is uninfluenced by your decision. If he fucks it out of you, the new narrative you’re longing for will fully take place and make living through this bearable. You know you can’t have him the way you’d like, but if fate wrote that you’re to have him this way—you don’t mind altering it to the little desires you’re allowing yourself to have. 
Once in a lifetime opportunity. You can’t lose it. 
Jungkook is left astounded by your words, eyes widening, shock evident on his features. Like your words, he softens, unclenching his fingers from your suppleness, the darkness in his irises making a way for gentleness to come through. He rubs the small of your back, hands ascending to your spine, feeling the clip of your bra, until he finds the nape of your neck. He holds you there, tenderly, as if you were a porcelain doll he now was careful not to break. 
The change in his demeanor is stark. It surprises you as well—and like everything that has happened within the hour, it isn’t something you expected from him. The emotion that emerges from the roundness of his eyes touches the hardness of your decision, tries to get through, pokes a gap inside, letting the light in. 
He tucks his darkness back inside. Strokes the back of your head, the silky ends of your ribbons sifting through his slender fingers. You relax against him and your body does it for you. It welcomes his tenderness, glad for the truth to be out. You fight against it—against yourself, willing your decision not to break but remain firm. 
No strings, no pain.
But to no avail. The light spreads. His light. Celestial twinkles of stars, small parts of him that make him who he is. 
“You’ve never had anyone before me?” he husks, regret glossing over his eyes, holding your head firmly as he awaits your answer. More stars spill like liquid. 
You shake your head ‘no’, your chest tightening. 
He kisses you and there’s something different about the way he does it. Now you can sense the carefulness you searched for earlier and you taste the primal core of loving care in the movement of his lips. The kisses are long, deep. As if you’re a different person now, a girl unlike any of the ones he mentioned. Someone who matters, someone who’s solid. You’re back at the beginning. 
A lump forms in your throat. 
“You sure about this?” he asks. 
One part of you, greater and illuminated by his stars, wants it gently like this, with flowers of innocence and purity besprinkled across his features, never leaving you out of his sight, taking care of you. But you fear that if you allow him to be tender, your heart will choose him again and cling to his side. The other, more faint part of you, affected by your decision, thinks it’s better to stick to the role-play, for there’s the aspect of illusoriness that will not bruise anyone’s hearts, especially not yours. It will make you horny, Jungkook will get you off and, glowing, you’ll go home.
You can’t decide. It’s too much of a heavy weight to bear on your shoulders. You can’t do it.
You need him to say the word. You need him to decide what will be the face of the trajectory of your premium friendship. 
Flowery or deceitful? 
A small candlelight in you hopes for gentleness and purity before your fear unfairly puffs it out. 
“Yes, I’m sure. I want you.” 
Jungkook lays you down and, at last, you feel his manhood against you. He bends to pepper apologetic kisses along the column of your neck and you feel the authenticity of his regret, thrumming against you warmly. Your breath hitches in your throat, the principle of the candlelight in you not being a high hope after all—
“I’m sorry. I should’ve gone about this better.” A kiss to your cheek; you stifle your sobs. “I should’ve checked in with you, but I jumped straight in. This was a mistake on my part. I’m sorry.”
He blames himself, not you. 
You want to remain stoic, but his authenticity beckons yours to come out and envelop him whole, gives access to your emotions and you can’t stop the miniature teardrop from flowing down the side of your nose. Neither can you stop the words that follow its footsteps. 
“I should’ve told you first,” you whisper, sniffling. Jungkook furrows his brows at the expression of your pain in tender emotion, wiping it away. “But I was bad—reckless.” 
He chuckles softly, caressing your hair. “You’re an angel. Sent to my side for me. You weren’t bad. I didn’t mean what I'd said.” 
His words, his touch, the kiss he adds to your cheek to punctuate his sentence—Jungkook erases everything that has just happened. 
Newness rushes in your chest, the pouring of spring into summer permeates your whole being. You hear the birds sing, the rustle of flimsy flower petals on tree branches as the warm wind grazes it with its touch. Jungkook seals this feeling by pressing a kiss to your sternum. 
He said it, so it must be so. You trust him. 
The firmness of the cage around your decision unlatches. Doesn’t fly away like the birds. Is a little bit afraid of peeking out. The candlelight returns to light up the room around that cage, blossoming into the sun. 
“We don’t have to do anything, if you don’t want to,” he says, looking up at you from the place where he dragged your top down to kiss your skin. 
The sun rays in you absorb all of the darkness. The firmness extends one wing. 
You run your fingers through his hair. Figure the only thing the summer in you is missing is the heat. You want him, you want sex and you don’t want to think about feelings or consequences. You don’t want to choose between anything anymore. You just want to enjoy yourself. 
“I meant it when I said that I want you to be my first,” you say, fingers curling around his ear. Jungkook leans into your touch and it’s as if he’s massaging the wing to alleviate it from a cramp due to being tucked in for so long. 
“Okay,” he sighs, taking your hands and pinning them on the pillow and bunny above your head. He sits up, examines you and you wonder if he can see how truly fragile you feel. “Do you trust me?” 
He’s had half a year of going out with you, mingling his life with yours, spending money on you and treating you like an absolute treasure to build your overall trust. And what he did just now? How he erased your pain? Your nod is immediate; you don’t need to think twice. 
“Of course I trust you.” 
“Good.” A soft smile. “I’ll make sure your first time will be beautiful for you.” 
Your heart thuds. His words steal all the breath in your lungs, smoothing out the surface of your body for his stars to fill. Tears prick at your waterline. 
“Are you scared?” 
You’re an empty canvas. 
“Not anymore.” 
Jungkook nods, gladness pulsating off of him. “I’ll be here the whole time. I won’t leave you, not even once, okay?” 
“Okay.” 
He finds the zipper on the side of your skirt and yanks it down. “How many times do you wanna come?” 
The ridiculousness of the question makes you laugh and you hide your face beneath your palms. “To be honest, I don’t expect to come at all. It is my first time after all.” 
You marvel at the honesty seeping out of you. His work, no doubt. 
Jungkook frowns, ridding you of the skirt, fingers hooking under the hem of your top. At the reveal of your pink, flowery, see-through bra, he stops altogether, stunned. He fondles the material, grazing over your soft nipples, at last reaching the embroidery of the small petals. He gasps in wonder, eyes flicking to your intimate parts to see if you’re wearing a matching set. 
The same flowers adorn the suppleness of your tummy. 
Jungkook smiles at his discovery. Is hasty as he drags the nylon of your tights down your legs, along with your knee socks. 
“I’ll decide how many times you come for me, then.” 
Heat pools in your femininity. There it is, the dominance that you love. Yet this time, it’s laced with his gentleness. Heaven on earth—a meadow full of flowers in the middle of summer. Like the ones on your lingerie. 
Joy grasps your heart. “Do I get to know before you start?” 
Jungkook chuckles, pressing a kiss on your tummy. “What, you wanna count them down for me?” 
You asked just because, but the idea excites you. You nod. 
Your response prolongs the rumble of his laughter and you feel its vibration as he kisses his way up to your clothed breasts. You’d think he’d focus his attention on them, but he straightens—reaches for something behind him and retrieves your white knee socks. He bunches them in his hands and puts them on you as if he were dressing a child. 
Paradoxically, goosebumps spread all over your thighs. 
Smoothing the material over your thighs, he lies back down against you, lips latching on the spillage of your breasts that your bra gives him. While it feels dizzying, you still want to know the number. You poke him in the bulging muscle of his arm and in the process, you flush his cheeks red. 
Jungkook pushes your tits together and licks over the line in the middle. The sight of the shine of his wet tongue against it drenches your pussy, ruining your pretty underwear, and you want him there, on your sweetest spot. Your nipples stand to attention and Jungkook listens to their call, thumbs brushing across them. 
You mewl, grinding your hips against his stomach. 
“Two times when I eat you out; two times around my cock,” he answers finally, awakening your butterflies. “How many times is that, then?” 
Amidst the pleasure, you do the math. “Four.” 
“That’s right. You think you can do that for me?” 
You’re not sure. In fact, you’re not sure of anything—lost in his touch, in his energy. 
“I don’t know,” you say, truthfully, skimming his face for a sliver of disappointment in his features. 
You find none. Only tenderness—round, soft eyes, brown in the light he radiates, nose and mouth buried in your tits, sucking on the skin, making you feel good. 
“That’s okay. We’ll try together. Nothing bad is gonna happen to you if you don’t come as many times. Or at all. I promise.” 
Your chest clenches. You grab his face and kiss him, licking over his bottom lip before you slip your tongue inside. Jungkook grunts, rolls his own muscle over yours, tasting you, feeling you. He inhales sharply against you, once again taking charge of the kiss, taking each and every thought and negative feeling you had and crushing it to smithereens. 
He lifts you and switches places with you, sitting you down on his lap with your back supported by his chest. He roams his hands all over you—tits, tummy, hips, sides and thighs while he busies his mouth on your shoulder. As your eyes follow each movement, you notice the marks he embellished your breasts with and your arousal grows—so much that you take his wandering hands and hook them under the waistband of your underwear, guiding them down your thighs. 
There’s a change to his breath when his index and middle finger feels up the fleshiness of your cunt for the first time. Hard, raggedy and absolutely tormented. He glides those digits up and down your dewiness, listening for the squelching sound that makes his cock twitch beneath you. 
He moans onto your neck, nose tracing the column on its way to your ear.  “How do you touch yourself?” 
A sudden shyness overtakes you and you turn your head, needing to hide in his neck this time. You remain silent, the words lodged in your throat. 
Jungkook sees you. 
“Do you rub your little clit from side to side or in circles?” he questions, helping you answer. 
“I—I like both,” you whisper onto his skin, moving your hips so his fingers slip to your clit, the sweet spot where you need him the most. He grabs the back of your thigh and lifts it, spreading you open, meanwhile you chase the firmness of his fingers.
“Just like that, ride them,” he husks, eyes dazed, fixed on the roll of your pelvis. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” 
Head on top of yours, you nod, never ceasing your movement, transfixed, just like him, by the constant way the pads of his fingers fondle your clit before dipping between your lips. The heat of the summer tightens in your lower belly and it’s a desperate litany of begging what your mouth utters, despite the fact you’re not really sure what you’re asking for, but you let him hear it. You’re close, so unbelievably close, yet still have a road to walk on before you, and you close your eyes to feel the delight of his touch more deeply, only to find that you manage to do nothing of the kind. 
When you sense his eyes on you and by instinct you reciprocate his stare, that’s when you feel the depth you sought after. Mouth parted, pupils dilated, eyelashes a drowsy catastrophe, messy hair casting a soft shadow over the planes of his blissed-out face. You want to kiss him. You want to make him feel as good as he’s making you feel—
“Let me do it now,” Jungkook says hurriedly, sensing the nearness of your climax. 
“Yes,” you croak out, halting the movement of your hips—and ‘yes’ is the word that ripples out of your mouth a hundred, a thousand more times when he spreads you wider and rubs his fingers on your clit from side to side. 
He feels the pleasure in sync with you, accepting all of your yes’, twisting his face the moment yours does, quickening the rapidness of his hand once he switches to circles to carry you to your summer-breathed paradise. 
And when you come all over his hand, he slips two fingers inside your hole.
He stills the buck of your hips. 
You widen your eyes at the new feeling of fullness and, panicking and constricting around him, you look at Jungkook, who merely strengthens his hold around you. 
“Trust me,” he says, breathing heavily. He doesn’t move his fingers past his first knuckles; he lets you adjust to the size. Gives you a kiss full of tongue to distract you. “Does it burn?”
You begin to pant against his mouth, the high of your orgasm long gone. You’re uncertain to count it as one when it was so short lived, ruined by the sudden plunge of his digits. But much to your surprise, you don’t detect any burn in your walls that he speaks of, which you realize was his intention.
“No, it just feels a bit uncomfortable.” 
He kisses you again. You feel your lips go numb, eyes lidding at the pressure you feel as he sinks his fingers a little bit deeper and begins to move them sluggishly, your slick creating another ring for him around his fingers. You try to meet his thrusts as the visceral sensation of being filled by longer, thicker fingers settles within you and takes roots. You discover that movement is the key to parting the uncomfortable feeling and it steps to the side to let the pleasure walk forward.  
Jungkook presses his palm flat against your clit, guides the pleasure to envelop your body when he plunges his fingers deeper, past the second knuckles and fucks you in swift jerks. Your mouth falls open in a silent moan and he fills in the sound, expressing his fiery delight for you at the clench of your walls against him, accommodating for him, for his desire to stretch you out, so when he finally enters you, no pain comes to greet you. 
Deeper and harder—yes, that’s what feels good. You roll your body, becoming waves of the sea as wetness and the build up of pleasure—seafoam—is all your senses wrap around. 
“Feels good, baby?” 
His need to check in with you speeds up the nearing expansion of your orgasm. Pointer and pinky finger digging into the skin of your backside, you watch the in and out motion, the digits coming out wetter and wetter each time.
“Feels so fucking good. I’m gonna come. I’m so close.” 
It’s quicker. Way quicker than your first tiny orgasm. He slips in and out of you so smoothly—you’re obsessed with the sight, ravaged by it entirely. You grind your hips and fuck yourself back, picking up the pace but slowing down instantly when you feel yourself at the peak of your climax.
You want to prolong it. You love the feeling too much to end it too soon.
Jungkook stops your movements fully.
“I want to be the one who makes you come,” he murmurs. “I want to be the one who fucks your brain out. I want to feel you squeeze around my fingers. Fuck, I want it so bad.” 
His hand drifts to your neck just to hold you there, the other, the busy one, fingers you harder, your fast approaching orgasm blinding your senses. Your drenched cunt squelches around him, the sound so lewd it causes you to seek comfort—your hand flies to his on your throat, fingers wrapping around his wrist, the tip of your pointer reaching the fat bulb of bunny’s head on his ring. 
Harder and faster. A scalding fire burns you and you just take it. Loll your head back against his shoulder, giving him the space to grip your jawline. Flames grow closer and closer, leaving a layer of sheen on your body in its wake. You feel the sudden need to pee.
“Oh my god, Gguk—” Your muscles tense. Close, so close. “Gguk, Gguk—”
“What, baby? What’s the matter?” he husks, squeezing your neck once. “You’re gonna come for me? Gonna come on my fingers?” 
You nod quickly, too quickly. Flames of the sun, licking you. Flames of the summer heat. Just what you wanted. 
Jungkook opens your jaw, swirling his tongue around yours. “Let go. Come for me. You can do it, I got you—I got you. Come for me, baby, please.”
Obeying his desperate order, you do.
A small stream of your pleasure, a faint fountain, trickles out of you and into his hand. He gasps, in unison with your whimpers, and you’re transmitted elsewhere. The wildly colorful, blooming meadow on a hill, overlooking the languorous sea and he’s there. Reaches behind himself. Offers you his hand. The wind ruffles his black hair, sweeps it back and you’re giddy—as giddy as Bam, as giddy as you were in the moment the slid the white bunny ring on your finger—to take the last two of his slender fingers, the pinky and the ring, and sit with him by the edge of the cliff. 
“Did so well for me.” 
The whisper takes you back and you awake. 
You’re different. Incandescent. Of life, of stars and its light, of growing fondness for the man you sit perched on the lap of, whose fingers still remain sheathed inside of you. He changed you. Perpetually, absolutely. He changed you and made you into something new. Something that is softer, more elegant—smaller but assertive. Alluring and kind. Indisputably good. 
He fucked everything negative out of you with his fingers. Left the vast canvas of stars inside of you.
You’re no longer a plain spread of cotton, but a living, breathing artwork. His artwork.
Once he fucks you with his cock, you wonder what further internal changes are going to occur within you.
You feel a great deal of gratitude for him—and you want to reciprocate all that he’s done for you. You want to work hard at it. Spoil him. Make him whimper. You believe he deserves it.   
“You finger yourself often? How come you took my fingers so well, hm?” 
You’re panting, unable to speak. Absorbing the sharpness of the stars, acclimatizing to the change. 
“I guess you do, huh?” he deduces. “Good little girl, preparing herself for me.” 
For the life of you, you can’t catch your breath.
Jungkook kisses your cheek deeply. Pecks you on the same spot a hundred times, slowly taking out his fingers. Lets you see your slick coating his fingers and, softly, you gasp at the little ripples of wrinkles upon the tips of his fingers, mouth parting.
And then he sinks them into your mouth. 
His hardness twitches behind you and you moan, your daintily bittersweet taste making your head spin. And when you look at him, you’re met with the utmost pink-dusted adoration painted on his face. You kiss it, inhaling it, letting it flow into your system so it suffuses your bloodstream, letting him taste you. You may not feel your lips, but the sentient poetry of the stars begins to sing in you. His stars. You feel like a flushed floweret visited by a bee. Spent, but happy. 
Happy to be wanted.
Good, because he said you were.
As if internally intertwined with him, you feel the identical heat tinge your cheeks. 
He says nothing as he lays you down and spreads your legs back to the way they were. Though when he’s graced with the sight of your bare cunt in all her glory, his face says everything that his mouth isn’t capable of. Hunger and torture—lips agape, corners of the mouth shiny with the rush of drool and Jungkook wipes it away, then lowers his fingers to your clit, to your lips, becoming more acquainted with this intimate part of you that no one had seen before him. He traces your small hole, even going as far as to your other, tinier hole and you yelp, stopping his exploration. 
Jungkook merely chuckles, eyes darting to yours. “You’re so pretty.” You grow so hot that you think you must be on fire. “Especially there.” 
You mewl, shrinking, hands looking for anything to hold and finding his bunny plushie. You take her into your arms, inhaling a scent that could never be hers. You recognize immediately whose it is. 
Musk, vanilla, wood. 
The thought of Jungkook cradling her while he sleeps moves you and you pout. 
“How we feeling?” he asks, still caressing your fleshy cunt, dripping with dew. 
Overjoyed. Overstimulated.
Heavenly.
“Good.” 
A foxy smile. “How many orgasms was that, hm?” 
You don’t know where your shyness comes from and why it chokes all of the words you want to say. You bury your face in bunny for a moment, taking a breath to fight against it, so you can please him because that’s all you yearn to do. 
You open your mouth, but no words come out. 
Jungkook stifles a laugh and it makes you feel terrible. And it’s worse when he leans over to kiss you, turns his head at the last moment and faces bunny.
“Bunny, how many times did she come?” he asks her, offering her his ear to hear her answer. Looks at you. Widens his eyes. Gasps. “Two,” he mouths. Listens some more. Nods. “I know she thought she wouldn’t come at all. Crazy, right?” Then he lets out an endearing sound. “She said she’d believed you could do it the moment you said it. She’s so happy for you. How cute,” he coos. 
You giggle, the bridge in your throat loosening, light flooding you, over and over, until you think you can’t take any more of it. You feel so full, so happy and the sensation threatens to pour out of your tear ducts. 
It heals something within you—that he treats you like this at your most vulnerable state. Your inner child flares, the stars the strength that fixes her stoop, helping her arise, stand straight, stand powerfully. 
He smiles down fondly at you. “So what number are we at?” 
You hide your face behind your hands. “Two.” 
“What did you say? I didn’t catch that.” 
You drop your hands and with as much energy as you can muster, you repeat the number. 
He purrs, caressing your cheek. “Good girl.” As a reward, as if the praise wasn’t enough, he kisses you deeply. “Will you let me taste you?” 
You swallow his desire, but speak up your own, “I want to taste you first, please.” 
Jungkook hums, curses under his breath. He straightens and kneels before your form, fingers pinching the back of his T-shirt and pulling it over his body. You catch the sight of his broad shoulders, of each dip and muscle, and your irises grown in width. Him ridding himself of his clothes dishevels his hair and as he untangles his arms from the material, he smiles down at you, noticing your stare. 
He caresses the back of your thigh before his hand flies to his hard length. He palms himself once, then continues to undress—tugs his sweatpants down to his knees, though he doesn’t bother himself to fully take them off. The shape of him is more prominent through the fabric of his white Calvins, the bulge of his mushroom wet and pellucid, and you sit up, hand itching to touch him, to join his in making him feel good, but he cups your chin—forcing you to look up at him. 
He swipes his thumb over your lips. “You want it?” 
You nod. “So bad.” 
Jungkook curses again, the sound low and rough. 
“Touch it,” he orders and both of your hands listen, wrapping around his girth, squeezing beneath the head of his cock. The thickness of him makes you see the light of the stars that you sense fluttering feverishly inside of you. Your mind is too empty, too washed out by your orgasm, by the change that you don’t even think about how you’re going to take him. Jungkook hisses, tilting his head back before he looks down at you intently. “You did this before?” 
You’ve never seen one in real life before, let alone touched one.
“I’ve never let anyone get this close.” 
Jungkook strokes your pigtails. “How come you know what to do then?” 
Instinct or memory from porn you watched—you don’t know, it all blends together within the fuzziness of your mind. And you tell him.
“I watch a lot of porn.” 
Jungkook smiles coyly and it strikes you. You’ve never seen him smile this way before or, even, feel this way before. All you know from him is dominance, dominance and dominance. 
You release him from the confines of his boxers and repress your gasp. His ever glistening tip reaches just below his navel and the thickness of his girth obscures most of his pubic hair. Along with the sound of your surprise, you also have a hard time swallowing the saliva collecting in your mouth. 
“I want you so bad,” you whisper, needy eyes looking up at him. Shy, too shy to let your gaze linger at the most intimate part of him. 
He sucks in a breath at your words, hissing. And you need him inside of you all over again. 
Fuck fuzzines in your mind. You’re fuzzy all over. Wrecked with nerves, suddenly. Your hands tremble, hovering in front of his manhood. Jungkook covers them with his, soothing you, and guides you to his shaft. Wraps your fingers around him. Doesn’t let go. 
The feel of him under his supervision is slow. He allows you to take in every ridge of him, every vein—the softness of his skin, the warmth and the weight. Round after round, up and down, until you get familiarized with him. A trickle of his male essence drips down the side of him and your tongue instinctively darts out. Like your hands, Jungkook’s breath shakes and he anticipates your next move, despite the fact he’s in charge. 
He’s been patient all this time, giving you the time you needed. But that hardly applies when you have him in your hands, when you own his neediness. His whimpers while he waits coax your slick out of you, soaking the bedding beneath you and you can’t take it anymore. 
Neither, evidently, can he. 
“Baby, please,” Jungkook croaks out. Tortured, so terribly tortured. Grip tight and clammy around your hands. 
So vulnerable. 
You ache. 
You lick up a stripe of his essence on the side of his cock and Jungkook shudders. Shifting onto your knees, you show him the milkie on the tip of your tongue and Jungkook pulls your hair, tilting your head back. Kisses you nastily, licking into your mouth. Moans, lowly. Then, he holds his girth at the base and pushes your head. 
When you take him, a mewl ripples around the thickness of him. His eyes roll back and his grasp of your hair tightens, burning your scalp, adding to the fire. He lets you feel it out; lets you figure out what to do, testing your knowledge from the porn you’ve watched. And the tensing of his stomach divulges his strained effort not to fuck your mouth. 
You go slow about it. Swirling your tongue around that rosy head of his, along that delicious ridge, licking a flat stripe across that line of his slit. Getting to know him in all those intimate places, relying on your senses—on them to tell you what he likes. Your hand begins to move on its own, gliding back and forth in tandem with your tongue stimulating his sensitivity. You try not to think about how you can barely fit him in your mouth, because if you do—you’ll ruin his bedsheets. 
But then Jungkook hums in approval, sending a gush of wetness out of you and you whimper—you whimper at the worsening ache you feel, at the helplessness that pools in your system by being just so filthily wet and horny. 
He moves your hand faster. Breath jagged, bedroom eyes zeroing down on you. And then—
Jungkook moans your name. Over and over, clenching and unclenching his hand on the back of your head. 
“Don’t have to teach you shit,” he spits. “You just watch porn all day, don’t you? Naughty girl.” 
Losing control for a split second, he rams his cock into your throat—and you don’t panic, you don’t yelp. Instead, you groan. 
He pulls you away from him with a sharp tug. Kisses you harshly. Shoves you down into the pillows with one push on your sternum.
Bending you in half, he drinks your cunt. Lips immediately suck on your needy bundle of nerves and it’s so fast you don’t even know which part of you he’s focusing on because he’s everywhere. Clit, hole, clit, hole—sucking, licking. Alternating, alternating so swiftly and deliciously that you completely lose your mind. 
And then he lifts your hips and holds them in the air, wanting you to see what he’s doing to you. Like you, he darts out his tongue and teases you, hovering the muscle above your clit. Shiny, nimble, capable of doing unspeakable things to you. He watches as your pussy drools for him and he chuckles darkly. Tongue lowering to collect it, but unlike you he never does it. He lets the dew trickle down your skin. 
“Cute little pussy. So wet. Wetter than when I fucked it. You liked playing with me on your knees, didn’t you?” 
With your fucked out brain, you don’t think it’s taunting what he’s doing. You deem it’s just him reveling in what he’s able to do to your body—in the fact that he owns it, that he teaches it new things. The glint in his dusky, lustful eyes proves it. 
Jungkook drags a long stripe on your clit, making your eyes flutter closed and your teeth to sink into your bottom lip to cage in your moans. 
“Talk to me.” 
You can’t. You don’t know how to talk. 
He stares you down. 
No answer from you. Just hard pants. Pussy drooling. 
“I won’t play with you, then.” 
Panic. “No.” 
He cocks a brow at you. “No?” 
Silence. 
He begins to lower you down but you grip his forearm. 
“Jungkook.” 
Bent over above you, head low, he merely flicks his eyes to yours. Duskiness, such blackening duskiness in those orbs. 
“Beg.” 
All your muscles tense. Wetness gushes out of you. 
Lucky for you, that word he wants is the one you haven’t forgotten. 
“Please.” 
“Please what?” 
You groan in frustration. 
“Be nice or—”
“Please, lick me.” 
That dark chuckle. You feel yourself becoming obsessed with it. 
“Where?” 
A challenge. Your throat dries up. 
“There.” 
He shakes his head disapprovingly, making a sound that expresses just how much he didn’t like that. 
“Try again. Last chance, little girl.” 
The loving smile on his face says everything about how that threat is feigned. You hear it tell you—you have as many chances as you need. He’s merely encouraging you to step out of your comfort zone. 
And something about that mellow, hidden kindness gently ushers you to do just that. 
“Lick my clit, please.” 
A hum. A long stripe on that sensitive, thumping spot. A roll of his tongue forward and backward.  
“Like this?” 
You choke out a moan. 
“Yes, please.” 
“Or—” He blows on you, causing you to tremble. “Like this?”
He shakes his head against you briskly, not yet at a full tilt. Just like his, your body shudders in his hands and he tightens his grip on your supple hips. You can’t take it, the pleasure is overwhelming and—
“Look at me,” he orders and you open your eyes, immediately. “Like this?” 
Jungkook adds more pressure and rapidness to the movement, leaving you glazed sweetly in the sheen of his saliva. He moves your hips up and down on the firmness of his tongue and you scream, taking a strong hold of his hair.
“Oh my god, yes, fuck, Daddy—”
Shocked, Jungkook groans against your pussy, slowing down to ingest what your mouth has just uttered. It’s more than natural to call him by a title like this, instinctual, innate. It fits him so well and it drenches your pussy, your slick amalgamating with his liquid love. You’re certain he feels the rush.
Your Daddy. 
You roll your hips against his tongue. Dark and more dark, those eyes of his. Bottomless pit.
“Fuck yes, call me Daddy again.” 
The whimpers you let out are pathetic and Jungkook shudders at them, groaning. You whine the title over and over again, a verdant, dreamlike litany of your feminine sexuality pampered, cared for, supervised. Jungkook accepts the gravity of it all, each declaration propelling him to suck your clit harder, bruises forming on your hips from his deathly grip, black eyes never leaving yours, hypnotizing you. 
And when you come like this, it’s unification what happens. 
You’re bound to him and he’s bound to you. 
Daddy and little girl. 
Throughout your sexual experience today, you had a hard time accepting things but this—this is something that slept inside of you all your life and just now has been awoken to a flickering canvas of bright stars. You feel it blink, adjust to the piercing light, before it smiles dolefully—happy to be conscious, happy to be caressed.
Jungkook kisses you and takes his time. The taste of your femininity, the fresh coldness of your change, the strong wine of his desire. You’re drunk. You’re slurring your mewls. 
And one thing about unification, it’s a mirror. 
You swallow down the same mewls, uttered by his throat. 
“Daddy’s gonna give it to you,” he whispers, adjusting between your legs. “Will be gentle. You’re safe with me.” 
He rakes the tip of his length along the entirety of your little sea-kissed seashell. 
“You want it? You want Daddy’s cock inside of you?” 
Jungkook looks into your eyes deeply as he asks you that question, the tip ready at your significantly smaller hole. He peppers kisses along your jawline and chin. 
“I’m scared it’ll hurt,” you murmur, brows furrowed. 
He kisses your cheek, the corner of your mouth. 
“We’ll chase the pain away,” he promises.
Your frown deepens. 
“But what if it doesn’t fit?” 
You expect him to chuckle, but he does no such thing. He absorbs your worry by kissing you tenderly. Then he glances at your body. Remembers he never took off your bra and fixes his mistake. 
“You may be small, but you were made to take me,” he says and your heart skips a beat; you wonder if he understands the gravity of his words as they take roots within you, rising to bloom into splendid flowers. “Besides, my dick is tiny. You won’t even feel it.” 
It is so far from the truth that you burst into giggles. He laughs along with you—a mirror reflected. 
Stars and flowers. Sea and freshness. You were made to take him. You trust him. 
He kisses your breasts, licking over your nipple—but briefly. Holding his shaft, he asks if you’re ready. You nod, your fingers desperately searching for his and Jungkook notices. Sinking slowly inside of you, he grabs his bunny plushie and tucks her into the crook of your elbow. 
There’s a pinch of pain, blended with the feeling of discomfort as your walls stretch around his head. 
Seeing it painted on your face, Jungkook draws close, enveloping you and bunny in his heat. Pushes a little more in. You wail softly, the pain intensifying. Fear intermingles with your features and Jungkook—the worry in his countenance makes you almost weep.
“Hold onto me,” he says, brows scrunched, so—so serious. “Relax, baby. I got you.”
You hook your arms around his neck, bunny sandwiched between your chest and his. Jungkook saves this time to let you adjust around him. 
“I know it hurts,” he whispers onto your mouth, index finger, the ringed one, stretching to graze your cheek. “Just relax your muscles for me. It’ll feel good soon.” 
You nod, trusting him. 
He pecks you. Smiles. 
“How many orgasms are we at?” 
You roll your eyes, your own smile threatening your lips. “Three.”
Jungkook hums. Pecks you again. You feel your walls loosening, little by little.
A smug smirk. “You didn’t expect that, did you?” 
“You obliterated my expectations.” 
“Just wait until I fuck you properly.” 
You blush, eyes twinkling. 
“Pretty girl.” He kisses you and you feel your attachment forming again, though this time—newly. As light, as free as an entanglement of seaweed upon seashore, you and him. Connected. Bound. No fear, not even a hint of it. “I heard you watch porn.” 
Your flush deepens. Jungkook sinks a little deeper. A faint pain—nothing bad. 
“Who told you?” You laugh, the sound ridding you of your shyness. 
But Jungkook grows solemn.
“Tell me what kind you watch,” he whispers, angling his head to give you a tiny kiss. 
Your cheeks hurt from the smiling, from the onrush of emotions within you, sloshing to and fro. You feel hot all over.
“The one where all the focus is on the girl,” you whisper back. “The guy uses all kinds of toys on her and she just takes it. Comes so many times and there’s a countdown for it.”
Humming, he begins to nibble on the skin beneath your jaw, making your breath shallow. He pushes in another inch—and the pain is worse. You tighten your grip around him.
“And how many times do you come when you watch it?” Deep, deep is his voice, the calmness to your nerves due to the pricking you feel. 
“I don’t stop coming.” 
Jungkook swears under his breath and clenches his digits into a fist beside your head.
“And you finger yourself?” 
You nod, confidently. Another inch. He smiles at your confirmation of his deduction.
“How many fingers?” 
You scoff. “Just one.” 
“Well done,” he praises, kissing you once, keeping his mouth on you even as he asks, “ready?” 
You nod, again, even though there’s fright to your eyes. He sees it and he brushes his eyelashes against your eyelids while he kisses you, taking it all away. And he doesn’t stop, even as he pulls out and thrusts back into your heat. Gently, so awfully gently. 
He didn’t break his promise. 
Jungkook rocks his hips in slow, sensual, prolonged staccatos, moaning into your parted mouth. You’re so focused on him—on the bulging of his muscles on the either side of your head, the broadness of his shoulders, the slick sweat dripping down his neck, right from the top of his tattoo; on the sheerness of his pleasure as he moves in and out, carefully so as to not frighten you, that the pain quickly subsides. 
And there you feel it. 
The sensation unlike any other. 
He rams into you, seeing the wrinkle between your brows smoothing, the lust clouding your eyes as the delight spreads all over your body, bringing along little dots of goosebumps. The night sea, windless, still hot from the afternoon’s goodbye kiss. You feel it—and you feel it deeply, sinking inside of you with every inch of his manhood. So much that you meet his thrusts. 
“That’s it, baby. Fuck yes,” Jungkook murmurs, enraging the waves within. “Feels good, doesn’t it? Being fucked?” 
Stars and its light. He picks up the pace, hooking your leg over his shoulder, entering you deeper and deeper, giving you more than half. The thrill of feeling so full—you curse, you moan, you can’t hold it in, even if you tried. And Jungkook coos at your conveyance of the pleasure he’s giving you, never lifting his eyes off of yours, off of your features, your emotions. Surveying you, controlling you, making sure you’re okay—more than okay.
You sense the pressure coil deep within your core, the sense of your climax approaching and you’re astonished at how quick it is. You halt your own movements, needing—wanting him to be the one to get you there, the one who owns your orgasms. 
“Gguk, Gguk, fuck—”
“I know,” he breathes. “I’m gonna make you come all over my cock.” 
He fucks you harder, making you cry out. Deep, deep staccatos, so different from the slow, languid ones. You can’t catch your breath, the sea within you sloshes violently and then—
Softly, you sprinkle him with your fountain of pleasure. Not enough to drive him out, but sweetly enough to force him to groan against you and pound you harder into the mattress. Continuing as if you hadn’t come. 
You don’t have the time or the space to think about what just happened—he fucks each and every thought of you. 
“My little squirter,” Jungkook mutters, kissing you. “One more, baby. One more for me and I’ll paint you with my cummie. Hm, you want that?” You’re gone, flung out of this world into a tranquil island. The palm trees, the sea and his cock. Your emotions are numb, body limp. All you feel is his cock, ramming and ramming into you. “Or you wanna swallow it for me like a good girl?” 
“Swallow, please,” you croak out and Jungkook makes a sound of approval. Rewards you by giving you the full thing, filling you balls-deep. 
“You feel me?” He kisses you, tugging your bottom lip with his teeth. 
Glorious, glorious delight. You can’t breathe. Too much. 
“I feel you—” You lift your head to look down where you’re connected. “I—I feel you in my stomach.” 
Sitting back, he lifts your hips and palms the bulge just a little bit above your mound. Feels it move under him once he resumes fucking you. He replaces his hand with yours, keeping you distracted as he undoes the ribbon in your hair and ties your wrists with it. Right there above the bulge, where he fucks you. Then he latches onto your hips and jackhammers his cock into you, watching as your tits along with bunny bounce with each slam. 
“You look so pretty like this, tied up for me, taking all that I’m giving you,” he says, thumbing your clit, making you cry out. “Such a good fucking girl for me. I’m bringing you up so well.” 
“Daddy,” you call out and Jungkook nods.
“Yes, that’s right. Daddy is fucking you so good.” 
White flashes. Seafoam. The pressure in your tummy deepening and deepening. The roar of the night sea and your body following—you come all over him, painting him iridescent with your dewiness. His joggers, dragged halfway down his thighs, his boxers are all ruined—pelvis, thighs and cock glistening. It’s such a beautiful image to you that it suffuses you with energy and you begin to speak. 
“Please, come for me.” 
Surprised, Jungkook chuckles. “Don’t you have orgasms to count down?” 
The ever persistent need for control. You kiss him, slip your tongue into his mouth to shut him up and you struggle against your ribbon, for the feeling of kissing him without your hands makes you feel iffy.
“Five. I came five times for you just like you wanted,” you whisper. “You fucked me so good. I’ll never forget it.” 
And it’s the truth.
Jungkook pecks you once deeply, humming into the kiss. He pulls out of you and whilst he strokes his cock, his fingers tug down the ribbon around your wrists. You take your place on your knees, gazing with awe and hunger at his shiny length. And as if he needed it, he plunges his fingers into your mouth for more lubrication. Then, grabbing your jawline gently, he pulls you in towards his cock, letting your lips play with his tip the way you like it as he jerks himself off. You flick your tongue under the ridge of his head and his length twitches, stunning you. You do it again, more rapidly, and you don’t stop until Jungkook begins to tremble. Pulling him inside your mouth, then out, flicking faster and faster. Repeat. 
Jungkook grunts. 
“Yes, like that, princess. Fuck, I’m gonna come for you.” 
He announces it, but it still comes as a surprise when the first rope of hot cum spills onto your flushed cheek. You suck him harder for a moment before you stick out your tongue, eyes flick up, as he empties his balls for you, his hand never ceasing the swift tug on his length. 
And he just keeps coming. Rope after rope. Liquid star after star.
And you swallow it all. 
Spent, sweaty and breathless, he helps you swallow it. Dragging his fingers to the places your tongue can’t reach, he feeds you his cum and you suck on his digits. Your heart thuds in your ribcage, especially when he begins to play with your tongue, smiling down at you in that dopey way. 
He pats you on the cheek once you show him you’ve swallowed it all. 
“Good girl. Good little princess.” 
That you are. A changed person for all eternity.
“Is your tummy full?” 
You nod, beaming vehemently up at him, the aftertaste of the bitterness of his liquid stars still wafting through your senses.
The three forbidden words rise in your tongue, even though you don’t believe them—you think it’s just the opulence of new emotions and experience that forces those words on your tongue. But they remain adamant when he bathes you clean, when he brushes your hair and gives you his clothes to wear to bed. They provoke you right there on the tip of your tongue when he gives you his zipper hoodie to wear on his balcony once you tell him you need a smoke and he joins you, giving you his pack of cigarettes. 
And they come off the edge, in a different form, when you tell him of how he changed you while you hold his hand and he caresses your damp strands with a cigarette propped between his index and middle fingers, kissing your cheek. The smoke fixes a makeshift halo around both of your heads. One body, one halo. Bound.
“You’re such a lovable person, Gguk.”
What you don’t know is that those mere words changed the entire trajectory of his life. Yours, too.
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Š 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved.
BACK to masterlist / read part one, read part two, part three
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yakutarts ¡ 3 months ago
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Nightmare and Dream but feral, non-skeletal body!
For the love of god PLEASE click on the image for better quality + close ups and clothed version under the cut!!
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Would you kiss them?
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Video process:
I made these using a specific context
A while ages ago I drew and posted a drawing of Nightmare and Dream on their light ball form but with some alterations/personal headcanons.
On the post, I expressed my desire to draw the twins in a universe were Nim didn’t need to give them bodies, and just let them grow naturally. And specifically give them an animalistic appearance, instead of a humanoid one like most artist do.
You can see on the process video that it took me 1000 sketches to make something that looked good and I was happy with, the video is obviously sped up, the total time it took me to make this was 28 hours and 15 minutes.
Now explaining some things:
Why are they so big?
I read on a post made by Joku that Nim, before giving them skeleton bodies, tried to make them human ones, but the pure amount of magic and power the twins had made the human bodies explode or some shit. So she picked skeletons since the magic could flow freely through the bones without being confined by muscle and flesh. That made me think if their power had physical forms, it would be gigantic. So I gave them gigantic forms to better represent their status of strength and power, beings made from raw magic to serve as guardians of all emotions throughout the multiverse, of course I needed to make them big and intimidating!
Why the horns?
Artistic design choice, I gave them little horns and a chubby tail in their light ball form to purposefully make them more animalistic, wanted to keep it while making these. Also just giving them a smooth head with nothing much going on looked weird and boring.
Why the draconian look?
Dragons had been created and depicted as symbols of pure power above humanity and worshipped as deities throughout several cultures around the world, different depictions of dragons has been one of the only things present among almost all cultures, like a default folklore creature. While I tried to incorporate other mythical creatures in the design, the draconic body plan felt more right due to the influence of dragons on human beliefs, and their representation as magical and powerful beings beyond human comprehension. Plus I just really love drawing dragons.
Why the clothing choice? Also why is Dream half naked while Nightmare has everything covered?
While designing the clothes for Nightmare, I used as reference clothing that usually royalty would wear, Nightmare has a really big ego and sees himself as a king, so he uses fancy, expensive clothing and jewelry, adapted and designed for his anatomy. Not practical for battle, but his corruption can go through the fabric without damaging it, and most people and monsters just run when they see him, so he doesn’t worry about it getting dirty or tearing, Nightmare just expects every soul to instantly submit when they see him, so he never worries about getting into a battle and getting dirty he has that big of an ego.
Dream is the opposite, his style of clothing much more practical for running, jumping, flying, fighting and general exercise. He has 4 bags in total, 2 on each side, inside them he keeps several items, be it healing food, magical artifacts, first aid kit, gifts he receives, stuff he buys or random things he finds and wants to take home with him. Dream’s crown is now a colar couldn’t figure out how to make it work with the head shape and horns, his cape is from his official design, but changed to white, was planning to make it yellow but when I looked at it my eyes hurt because there was too much yellow everywhere. I made Dream’s clothes with the intent to match his official design, I didn’t to the same for nightmare because a turtle neck with a hoodie on a dragon would make him more huggable than intimidating. Plus I like to think that the leg warmers was a gift from Blue, and the ring on his horn a gift from Ink. Didn’t add more stuff on him because I couldn’t think of something that would look good and match Dream’s vibe, the rest of his clothes on his official design didn’t translate well here. Oh, while I was drawing this, I drew the colar and the leg warmers first, without the cape, Dream looked like a twink with a pet play kink.
Side note; neither Nightmare or Dream see the use of clothes as a necessity or as decency. For them clothes are nothing but pure decoration and to show off status for Nightmare, they can wear full body suits, partial clothing, just jewelry, or nothing at all, which is what they usually go for when at home, wearing or not wearing stuff doesn’t make that much of a difference to them at all.
Do they act as animals or do they have human intelligence?
Despite me using the word “feral” all the time to describe them, they do not actually act as animals. I’m only using “feral” to describe their body/anatomy, Nightmare and Dream are fully sentient and have human level intelligence/awareness. They are capable of speech and have opposable thumbs on their front paws, they can grab, write, hold… do anything a human can do with their hands with dexterity. But they do have to use only hand one at a time, and balance themselves with the other. To use both hands, they have to be sitting, or be supported by something, they can balance themselves on their wings if they have to.
And now contradicting what I just said, they have some animalistic behaviors. The twins can growl, purr and roar. Despite Nightmare being able to use his tentacles and Dream being able to shoot magic arrows out of his wings, they to also scratch and bite while fighting. Since they are big and heavy, they can easily crush bone under their weight and their bite force is strong enough to split someone in half. If you need a reference, just use Smaug from The Hobbit, he has more or less the balance of animal behavior and human intelligence I’m looking for.
Expanding more on this, the twins stretch just like felines, and often sleep in positions usually cats sleep in (they don’t actually need to sleep but do anyway). Dream likes to go fishing, and by fishing I mean jumping in a lake and chasing the fish underwater. He finds it more fun than sitting around and waiting for the fish to come to you instead.
I guess you count their lack of necessity to wear clothes as animal logic too?
_________________
If you have any more questions about them, I will be happy to answer!
And yes, I do plan on making more drawings of Nightmare and Dream on this form!
Dreamtale belongs to @jokublog
Feral concept/design by @yakutarts (me)
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mssalo ¡ 4 months ago
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Hummingbird - Part: II
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Summary: In the quiet town of Jackson, Joel becomes consumed by a dark and overpowering obsession with his new neighbor. What begins as fascination quickly spirals into something much darker as he loses control over his desires.
11k
Warnings: 18+, MDNI, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT, dark!Joel, obsessive!Joel, manipulation (emotional and psychological), gaslighting, power imbalance, age gap (not specified), stalking, dubious consent, daddy kink, breeding kink, possessive behavior, noncon elements, oral (pussy eating), unprotected PIV, creampie, voyeurism, possessivel controlling dynamics, trauma exploitation, Joel using your vulnerabilities against you, power play, obsessive desires, Joel blurring lines between protection and ownership. Joel is a huge red flag and reader has major daddy issues. Enjoy!
long&intense
Here's Part I.
· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··
Joel’s days had settled into a new rhythm, one that orbited around you.
Every moment spent outside Jackson’s walls, on the lookout for threats, was consumed by a burning impatience to return. The dangers he once faced with such resolve now seemed trivial compared to the intense need he felt for you. His thoughts were constantly on you, wondering what you were doing while he was gone. He imagined your gentle smile as you taught the youngest children in the settlement.
His patrols, once a predictable routine, now felt like an unwelcome interruption—an unwanted separation from the focus of his obsession.
You.
And now, he was determined to make you love him.
When he wasn’t on patrol, Joel made excuses to cross paths with you. He’d drop by the schoolhouse under the pretense of checking on repairs or offer to carry supplies for you.
At first, you were taken aback by his attention—after all, the quiet, gruff man who led patrols through the wilderness outside Jackson wasn’t exactly known for being sociable. But your innocence worked in his favor. You didn’t question why he lingered a bit too long when you spoke or why his gaze followed you so intently whenever you were near.
“Mr. Miller,” you greeted him one afternoon, flashing that soft, sweet smile that stirred something dark in him. “Here again?”
“Just Joel,” he corrected, his voice low and rough as he leaned against the doorframe of the classroom. “Figured I’d check in. See if y’all needed anythin`.”
You laughed lightly, brushing a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Always so helpful. I think we’re good today, but thank you.”
Joel’s eyes wandered to the children seated on the floor around you, their attention fixed on makeshift toys. He watched as one of the toddlers tugged at your dress, seeking your attention.
You were made for this. Made to be a mother.
He had seen you with them, crouched down, your voice soothing as you explained lessons or comforted tearful faces.
The way the children gathered around you, their trust unwavering, only heightened his primal urge. There was something about the way you nurtured and cared for them—the tender touch, the encouraging words—that stirred a desire in him beyond mere lust.
The sight of you, so gentle and attentive, sparked a deep, almost possessive longing in him. He imagined you with a child of your own. His child. The fantasy of you, swollen with his baby, your body soft and round, consumed him.
Joel pictured you in your small home, barefoot and glowing, your belly growing larger with each passing day.
The thought twisted something deep inside him, merging his desire with a possessiveness that bordered on madness.
You were too pure, too kind to grasp it, but Joel knew. You were meant for him—to bear his children, to belong to him in every sense.
His gaze darkened as he envisioned taking you right then and there. To bend you over one of the small desks, your soft curves pressed against the rough wood, his hands gripping your hips as he filled you—over and over.
The thought nearly overwhelmed him, the raw, primal urge almost too strong to control.
His hands flexed at his sides, clenching and unclenching as he fought for control. This wasn’t the time. Not yet. You weren’t ready. You still smiled at him with those innocent eyes, unaware of the dark hunger building inside him.
Joel wanted more than to claim you physically—he wanted to own every part of you. He wanted your mind, your heart, your body. He wanted you to be consumed by him the way he was by you.
He could wait. He’d be patient.
For now.
“Joel?” Your sweet voice cut through his haze, pulling him back to the present.
He blinked, realizing he had been staring. Your eyes met his, and you tilted your head slightly, concern touching your features. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” he rasped, clearing his throat, his voice thick with a rough edge. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
You smiled again, that same sweet, innocent smile that made his blood boil, completely unaware of the filthy thoughts running through his mind. You were so trusting. So naive.
Joel forced himself to return your smile, though it didn’t reach his eyes.
“If you need anything,” he said, his voice low and deliberate, “anything at all, you just let me know, alright?”
Your smile widened, and for a moment, his heart skipped a beat. “I will. Thank you, Joel.”
He nodded, turning to leave before his control slipped any further. As he walked away, he felt the weight of your gaze on his back, innocent and oblivious. He clenched his fists, his jaw tight as he stepped out into the cold air. His cock already throbbing again. His mind raced with plans, ideas forming and reforming. You were going to be his—he was going to make sure of it.
But first, he had to make you need him as much as he needed you.
· · ────────
In the weeks that followed, Joel's plan took shape with meticulous intent. Every interaction was calculated, every word carefully chosen to weave himself deeper into your life.
He began lingering outside the schoolhouse after his patrols, finding small tasks to do—fixing a loose door hinge, offering to carry supplies.
Always nearby. Always watching.
You began to smile at him more often, a soft glow in your eyes whenever he appeared.
Joel knew he was becoming a part of your routine, a constant presence you started to rely on without even realizing it.
The simple greetings, the quiet moments—each one brought you closer to him.
You started seeking him out.
You’d ask him for help with things around the house, questions about Jackson, and slowly, unknowingly, you let him into your world. Joel played the part of the dependable neighbor with ease, masking the deeper hunger that burned underneath.
It wasn’t just about being near you anymore. It was about making sure you needed him—emotionally, physically.
He wanted to become the one person you couldn’t live without.
One late afternoon, he found you sitting on the porch of your house, the sun casting a soft, golden light over everything. You had a worn notebook in your lap, absently humming a soft, familiar tune as you scribbled something down.
The sound was sweet, gentle, and it tugged at something deep inside Joel. He paused for a moment, just watching you, captivated by the way the melody seemed to wrap around you like a warm embrace.
When you finally noticed him, your face lit up, and his chest tightened at the sight.
“Hey, Joel,” you greeted him with a soft smile, the tune fading into the quiet evening.
“Hey,” he replied, his voice rougher than usual as he approached, the wooden porch creaking under his weight when he sat down beside you. “What’re you workin’ on?”
You glanced down at your notebook, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Oh, just some lesson plans for the kids. Busy day.”
Joel’s gaze softened as he watched you.
The way the light caught the soft strands of your hair, the way you absentmindedly tapped your pencil on the edge of the notebook—everything about you was so gentle, so perfect.
His hand twitched at his side, aching to reach out and touch you, to feel the warmth of your skin beneath his fingertips.
Instead, he kept his voice steady, though the desire simmered just beneath the surface.
“You’re good with them. The kids, I mean.”
You smiled again, a little shyly this time, the compliment making you blush just slightly. “Thanks. I try.”
The way you smiled at him, the trust in your eyes—it was all he needed to know that his plan was working.
You were beginning to let your guard down, to lean into his presence. Every time you looked at him like that, so open and unaware, it drove Joel further into his obsession.
my pretty little hummingbird.
The melody of your earlier humming lingered in his mind as he sat next to you, and he couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to have you all to himself—to be the one to hear you hum as you moved about your shared home, maybe with a child cradled in your arms.
The image of you, round with his child, your body soft and full, made his heart pound, once again.
He wanted that. He wanted everything with you.
You had no idea just how deeply he wanted to be your everything, just like you were becoming his.
For now, he would keep playing the part of the protector, the one you could count on.
But it wouldn’t be long before he’d make sure you needed him just as much as he needed you.
He could already see the shift—the way you sought him out more, the way your eyes softened when they met his, how you were humming more often, especially when you were near him, like you were already growing comfortable in his presence.
You were slipping into his grasp, slowly but surely.
And soon, you’d realize just how much you needed him—how much you craved the protection and the stability he offered.
He watched as you turned back to your notebook, your lips parting slightly as you absentmindedly hummed again, lost in thought.
Joel clenched his fists at his sides, the desire to claim you in every possible way nearly overwhelming. But he could wait.
For now.
· · ────────
That same evening, as the two of you sat on the small, worn sofa in your living room, the air between you seemed heavier, more intimate.
Joel was sitting close, the warmth of his body radiating toward you as the low light from a nearby lamp flickered softly against the walls.
There was a strange comfort in his presence, a grounding sense that you hadn’t expected to feel. Yet there he was—always there.
You hadn’t planned to talk about it, not with Joel, not with anyone.
But something about the quiet of the evening, and the way he sat so close, made you feel safe enough to let it out.
You shifted, pulling your knees up onto the couch, hugging them slightly as you stared at the floor.
“My father… I don’t talk about him much,” you began, your voice low, almost a whisper.
Joel didn’t interrupt. He just listened, his fingers barely grazing your arm, his touch subtle, steady.
He was patient, waiting for you to open up.
“He was never really the same after my mom died. He was… distant, like he was there, but at the same time, he wasn’t. I kept trying to reach him, to get him to see me, to just… care.” You paused, the lump in your throat growing harder to swallow.
“But no matter what I did, no matter how hard I fought for his attention, for his approval, he just... pulled away more.”
Joel’s fingers tightened slightly around your arm, his silent way of telling you he was there, listening. Right?
“We survived together for a while, just the two of us, after everything fell apart. He wasn’t much of a father by then, more like… just someone I had to follow, to keep up with. I was always trying to prove myself to him, to show him I could handle it. But it was exhausting.”
Your voice broke for a moment, and you felt your breath catch in your chest.
Joel shifted closer, his arm resting behind you on the back of the sofa, offering you the comfort of his presence without a word.
“And then… he died,” you whispered, the pain of the memory washing over you like a wave.
“We were out there in the wilderness, trying to survive, just like always. He got hurt, and I tried—I tried so hard to save him, to keep him alive.
A silent tear slipped down your soft cheeks, "But, again, it wasn’t enough. I wasn't enough. He died, and then he really left me. For good.”
A shudder went through you as you recalled those final moments, the coldness of his absence washing over you again.
"He left me, Joel. After everything. I was so alone after that. Completely abandoned.”
You took a shaky breath, the weight of your confession settling between you. "The anniversary of his death is soon."
You could feel the weight of the silence between you, the raw emotion of the confession hanging in the air.
You hadn’t spoken those words aloud to anyone, not since it happened. The loneliness, the helplessness—it had all stayed locked away inside you for so long.
Joel’s grip on your hand tightened, his thumb stroking the back of it in slow, soothing circles.
He shifted slightly, moving closer to you on the couch until his thigh pressed firmly against yours. His other arm, warm and strong, wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you toward him with a gentle but insistent force.
“Come here, sweet girl,” he murmured, his voice low and thick with that unmistakable Southern drawl that had become so comforting.
Without thinking, you leaned into him, your head resting against his chest.
The solid weight of him, the quiet rise and fall of his breathing, made you feel grounded in a way that nothing else had. His fingers tangled in your hair, stroking lightly as he held you close.
“You shouldn’t have had to go through that,” Joel whispered, his lips brushing the top of your head.
“Your father… he should’ve seen how hard you fought for him. But he didn’t. He failed you.”
The words struck a chord deep inside, and you felt another tear slip down your cheek, quickly absorbed by Joel’s shirt as he held you tighter.
He made it sound so simple, so black and white, and in this moment, it was comforting to believe that maybe it really had been that way.
· · ────────
He’d watched you closely in the weeks that followed, noting your increasing need for support, how you seemed to lean on him more and more.
It was all part of his plan, a strategy to make you depend on him, to crave his presence in ways you hadn’t before.
He saw the cracks in your composure, the way your smiles were less frequent, and how your gaze held a kind of forlorn hope whenever he was near.
And then he began.
Joel had put his plan into motion, slowly pulling away over the past week—just enough to make you feel the cold sting of his absence.
The timing wasn’t random; the anniversary of your father’s death was looming, and he knew the weight of that grief would come crashing down on you.
It was the perfect moment.
He could see it already in your face, the way sadness mixed with confusion, the subtle flickers of desperation as you searched for his familiar presence.
You leaned on him more in those days leading up, seeking comfort, but now, with him gone, you were left alone again, the emptiness creeping in.
Joel understood what that feeling of abandonment could do—it would remind you of the ache of being left behind.
But this time, instead of pushing you away completely, it would draw you closer to him.
You’d start to wonder where he was, why he wasn’t there, and with each passing day, your need for him would grow stronger.
And that’s exactly what he wanted.
The power of it fueled something dark inside him, but Joel didn’t flinch from it. It wasn’t cruelty, he told himself.
It was necessity.
· · ────────
The night of the anniversary, he knew you’d be at your most vulnerable. The idea of you coming to him, desperate and broken, fed his twisted satisfaction.
And sure enough, as he watched you from his porch, he saw you approaching his house, your posture hunched and hesitant, your eyes red from crying.
You were exactly where he wanted you: fragile, yearning for comfort, and completely under his control.
When you knocked on his door, your voice barely more than a whisper, Joel paused deliberately, savoring the moment.
His face stayed cold for a beat longer, a flicker of something darker dancing behind his eyes.
He knew it was you—he had expected this.
The satisfaction of your inevitable need for him made his chest tighten, not with tenderness, but with a twisted sense of control.
His mind wandered briefly, picturing you on the other side of the door—fragile, vulnerable, and craving him in the way he wanted.
The image sent a rush through him, his hand flexing at his side before he reached for the doorknob.
Joel knew what you would look like, how you would be standing there with those wide, innocent eyes, pleading silently for comfort.
It was exactly where he wanted you.
As he turned the handle and slowly opened the door, his gaze traveled over you, drinking in every detail.
You were wearing one of those soft, simple dresses he loved—the kind that hugged your curves in just the right way, brushing against your thighs.
The fabric clung to your chest, outlining the subtle rise and fall of your breath.
Your hair, slightly tousled, framed your face, and the way the fading evening light touched your skin made you look even more delicate. Almost ethereal.
Joels eyes lingered on your body a little too long before he forced them back to your face, taking in the sadness in your eyes.
You were so beautiful like this—small, fragile, clearly aching for someone to hold you.
The thought of you being this broken, this dependent on him, sent a pulse of something darker through his veins and all his blood rushing to his cock.
He let a slow breath out through his nose, shifting his expression into something softer, more concerned.
But underneath that, there was a twisted thrill.
You didn’t even realize how much you needed him, how perfectly you were falling into the trap he had set.
"Hey," he said, voice low and calm, his gaze flicking up and down your body before settling back on your face. "You alright?"
But the way his eyes darkened just a fraction as they swept over you again hinted at more.
His need to consume you was barely hidden beneath the surface, masked only by the false tenderness he had learned to wear so well.
You hesitated, a mix of hurt and confusion on your face.
“I… I don’t understand,” you said, stepping over the threshold and into Joel’s home, your voice wavering with uncertainty.
“You’ve been so distant lately. I thought—” Your gaze flicked up to him, pleading for answers. “I thought we were closer than this.”
Joel closed the door behind you with a deliberate, measured movement.
His eyes followed your every action, noting the way you hesitated at the entryway, clearly unsettled.
The sight of you, standing there with your heart exposed, only intensified his dark satisfaction.
He could see the raw need in your eyes, the desperate hope that he might provide the comfort you were seeking.
“Come on, baby,” he said softly, his voice laced with a false warmth that barely masked his true intentions. “Sit down. Let’s talk.”
As you settled onto the couch, your fingers twisting nervously in your lap, Joel took a seat beside you, his proximity charged with a subtle tension.
His gaze remained steady, almost predatory, as he observed the way your defenses were weakening.
The dim light in the room cast a soft glow over you, highlighting the vulnerability in your features.
Joel’s eyes lingered on the curve of your profile, the way your shoulders seemed to slump in defeat.
For a moment, he stayed quiet, eyes flicking down to where your fingers fidgeted in the fabric of your dress.
Then, in a voice that was strangely soft, he broke the silence.
"I thought maybe..." He paused, his jaw tightening slightly as if weighing his words carefully. "I thought maybe you'd gotten too used to me."
His words caught you off guard, and your eyes shot up to meet his. "Too used to you?" you echoed, confusion evident in your tone.
Joel nodded slowly, his expression shifting to one of thoughtful hardness.
There was something in his eyes, a shadow of frustration mixed with a dark calculation.
“Yeah,” he said, his voice gruff. “Maybe I’ve just been around too much. Maybe you’ve been handling things just fine on your own.”
His gaze was steady, almost penetrating, as he watched your reaction.
You could feel the weight of his words, a subtle threat hidden in the casual tone.
The idea that he might pull away, leave you to handle things alone again, seemed both daunting and unsettling.
“Joel, I didn’t mean—” you started to say, but he cut you off, leaning in closer.
His hand rested on your thigh, his touch a mix of warmth and intensity, grounding yet unsettling.
“I’ve been thinking,” he continued, his voice dropping to a low murmur, “about how you’re managing. Maybe you don’t need me as much as I thought. Maybe it’s time I stepped back and let you handle things on your own. Alone.”
The way he spoke made you feel the absence of his presence even more acutely.
His hand on your thigh was a stark contrast to the coldness in his words, a reminder of what you could lose.
Joel’s gaze remained locked on yours, his expression a careful mix of concern and something darker.
Joel’s fingers traced a small, deliberate path on your thigh, each touch a reminder of his influence and control.
“Maybe it’s time I let you prove it. All on your own”
As his words sank in, a rush of fear and vulnerability overwhelmed you.
You felt a cold, biting loneliness creeping in.
The memory of being abandoned, left alone in a world that felt hostile and unforgiving, came rushing back.
“Please, don’t leave me alone,” you pleaded, your voice trembling. “Not again. Not like this.”
The desperation in your voice was raw, a stark reminder of the pain from your past.
Joel’s expression softened ever so slightly, though the darkness still lingered in his eyes.
He watched as you struggled, the fear of abandonment triggering old wounds.
You could see the glint of something almost satisfied in his gaze, a cruel sort of pleasure at the way you were unraveling before him.
His hand on your thigh remained steady, a reminder of what you stood to lose if he followed through on his threat.
Joel leaned in, his voice a whisper of false reassurance. “I don’t want to see you suffer, baby. I just need to know you really want me here. That you need me.”
"You don’t know how much I need you," you whispered, your voice barely audible.
The words came out before you could stop them, a slip of your guard that Joel pounced on immediately.
He smiled, but there was nothing soft about it. "Yeah?"
His thumb, again, began to trace slow circles against your thigh, the touch deceptively gentle, though the look in his eyes was anything but.
"Because, baby, I’ve been needing you. More than you realize."
His voice dropped lower, and he shifted closer, his presence suffocating in its intensity.
"And I’ve been thinking... maybe you didn’t want me the same way. Maybe I pushed too hard, too fast."
You opened your mouth to protest, but he cut you off again, his hand moving from your thigh to cup your chin, forcing you to look him in the eye.
"But I get it now," he murmured, his voice dark and possessive. "I see it. You need me just as much. You’re just afraid to admit it."
His words hung in the air, heavy and laced with meaning, and you felt your heart pounding in your chest. Joel leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear.
"You don’t have to be afraid," he whispered. "You don’t have to hide how much you want me."
His hand slid from your chin down to your shoulder, then lower, grazing the fabric of your dress in a way that made your breath hitch.
He was testing the boundaries, pushing them, seeing how far he could go before you pulled away. But you didn’t. You couldn’t.
"I just needed to know," Joel continued, his voice soft but insistent, "that you want me, too. That you’re as hungry for this as I am."
Your lips parted, but no words came out.
Joel’s fingers trailed down your arm, intertwining with your own, holding them still.
His grip was firm, grounding, and yet there was that undercurrent of dominance there—the same unspoken claim he always made, like you were something precious and fragile, yet wholly his.
"I’m sorry," he murmured, though the apology didn’t feel entirely sincere. His voice was calm, soothing, but the darkness in his gaze remained.
"I didn’t mean to push you away. I just needed to make sure you wanted me like I want you."
His hand brushed over your cheek, the gesture tender, though you could sense the raw desire behind it.
"Tell me you want me, baby," he coaxed, his thumb stroking the side of your face. "Tell me I wasn’t wrong."
Your heart raced as you met his gaze, the intensity in his eyes almost too much to bear.
He was pulling you in, breaking down every last wall you had left, making you crave the very thing you’d been trying to deny.
"I need you," you breathed, the confession spilling from your lips before you could stop it.
Joel’s smile widened, that dark, twisted satisfaction gleaming in his eyes.
His grip on your hand tightened, his other hand slipping around your waist, pulling you closer.
"I knew it," he whispered, his lips brushing your ear. "I knew you couldn’t resist."
Joel’s eyes darkened with a twisted satisfaction as he leaned in closer, his hand brushing against your arm with an intimacy that belied his words.
“You don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing, but with a dark undercurrent. “I’m here now. I’ll take care of you.”
You shifted slightly, feeling a mix of relief and unease as you looked up at him. Joel’s gaze was intense, his expression one of smoldering desire masked by a veneer of concern.
He watched as your defenses crumbled, your need for comfort making you more vulnerable to his manipulations.
“Just let me be here for you,” he continued, his hand moving to your cheek, his touch almost tender but charged with a possessive edge.
“You don’t need to worry about anything. I’ll take care of you, baby. You just need to trust me.”
You nodded slowly, your resolve faltering as you leaned into his touch.
His words, though laced with a veneer of sympathy, were a seductive promise of control.
Joel could see the way you melted under his gaze, your need for him growing stronger with each passing moment.
He let his hand slide down your arm, his touch deliberately lingering as he coaxed you into his embrace.
“You’re safe here with me,” he whispered, his voice low and sultry.
“You don’t have to think about anything else. Just let me take care of you.”
You were too overwhelmed by your emotions to resist as he gently pulled you closer.
His hands roamed over your body with a possessive urgency, each touch calculated to deepen your dependence on him.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear. “I’ve wanted this for so long. You have no idea how much you mean to me.”
The warmth of his breath, the intensity of his gaze, and the possessiveness in his touch combined to create a heady mix of pleasure and apprehension.
Joel’s manipulation was complete—he had broken down your defenses, making you crave his presence as desperately as he desired to control you.
As his hands explored your body, his touch became more insistent, his words a blend of comfort and dark desire.
“You want me, sweet girl, don’t you?” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
As Joel's words and touch sank in, you felt a wave of relief mingled with your desperation.
The fear of being abandoned, of losing the small comfort he provided, made you cling to him even more.
Despite the unsettling edge to his words, the fact that he was showing you kindness again brought a surge of gratitude.
You wanted to feel cared for, wanted to be held in a way that made you forget the fear of being left alone.
"Please, Joel," you whispered, your voice barely above a breath. "I want you."
Joel’s touch became a tangled mix of comfort and possessiveness.
He held you close, his hands roaming over your body with a growing insistence, reinforcing the notion that you were his and his alone.
His whispers and touches were a heady mixture of dark desire and a twisted form of affection, leaving you both comforted and caught in his web of manipulation.
Joel’s voice was low and soothing, yet carried an undercurrent of dominance.
“You’re just a girl who needs someone to look after her,” he said, each word dripping with arousal.
“Let me take care of everything for you. You don’t need to worry about a thing while you’re with me. Just relax and let me handle it all, baby. I’m here to make sure you’re okay.”
His touch was slow and deliberate, slowly tucking up your dress, his words designed to reinforce both his control and your vulnerability.
You shivered as his lips pressed against your skin, your mind clouded with a mix of longing and confusion.
Joel’s voice was soft, almost tender, but with an unmistakable edge.
“You’ve been so lost and vulnerable,” he murmured, drawing you closer.
“You need someone strong to guide you, to make you feel safe. Let me be that for you. You don’t have to handle any of this alone. Just let go and let me take care of you.”
His lips brushed against yours, soft and insistent.
"Let me be that for you, let me take care of everything. You don't have to do anything but trust me."
As his lips pressed firmly against yours, he deepened the kiss, each movement reinforcing his words, pulling you further into his control.
His tongue slid into your mouth, exploring and claiming you with a possessive fervor.
"You're so sweet," he murmured between kisses, his voice raw and heated.
"I've been waiting for this, needing to feel you like this." His hands roamed possessively over your body, pulling you closer as he deepened the kiss, his desire unmistakable in every touch and caress.
Joel’s lips remained locked on yours, the kiss growing more urgent and desperate.
His hands wandered over your body, exploring with a mixture of hunger and tenderness.
One hand gripped the back of your neck, pulling you closer, while the other slid down to your waist, pressing you firmly against him and his pulsing length.
His kisses were relentless, each one deeper and more insistent than the last.
He traced the contours of your lips with his tongue, his touch turning more possessive.
“You feel so perfect,” he whispered between heated kisses, his breath hot against your skin.
“I can’t get enough of you.” His fingers roamed over your body with increasing boldness, every touch stoking the fire between you.
Your body responded instinctively to his touch, even as your mind struggled to catch up.
Every caress, every lingering touch made you shiver, a mixture of confusion and pleasure rippling through you.
Your breathing quickened, each kiss and stroke sending waves of warmth through your veins.
Though you were unsure and your thoughts swirled with uncertainty, the sensation of his hands roaming over your skin felt undeniably good.
You leaned into his touch, your body betraying your confusion with a need that grew stronger with each passing second.
Your fingers clung to him, finding solace in the way he held you, even as a part of you grappled with the intensity of the moment.
You just want to finally feel safe again.
You clung to him, breath shaky and eyes wide with a mixture of confusion and need.
“Please,” you whispered urgently, voice breaking, “I need you to take care of me, to make me feel safe. I can’t do this alone anymore. I need you to be the one to make me feel good, to give me what I’m missing. I want you to be everything for me.”
Joel’s eyes darkened with a mix of lust and satisfaction. He pulled you closer, his voice a low, seductive murmur.
“Oh, sweetheart, you have no idea how much I’ve been waiting for you to say that. You need me to take care of you, to make you feel safe? I’m going to give you everything you’ve been craving. You don’t have to worry about a thing anymore—just let me be the one to fulfill all your desires.”
His hand traced a heated path along your side, each touch designed to ignite your senses further.
“Yes, please” you whimpered into his mouth.
That’s all he wanted.
Joel’s touch became reverent, his hands exploring your body with a possessive hunger. His lips followed the path of his fingers, kissing every exposed inch of skin as he spoke with a fervent, dirty intensity.
“Fuckin‘ perfect, every part of you is just for me,” he whispered against your collarbone, his breath hot and tantalizing.
“I want to worship every curve, every soft spot. you’re so fuckin beautiful, and you need me to show you just how much. Let me savor you, baby—every touch, every kiss is for you. You’re mine now, and I’m going to make sure you feel that deep in your bones.”
Joels lips slowly traveled down your body.
His breath was warm and heavy against your skin as he knelt before you. His gaze was dark, filled with an unrestrained hunger as he whispered, his voice a sultry murmur.
“so sweet, so irresistible,” he said, his fingers grazing your inner thighs with a teasing touch.
“I’m going to show you just how much you need me. You’re like a little princess who needs to be worshipped, and I’m more than happy to oblige. Let me taste every part of you, baby. I want to make you feel so good, so full of pleasure, you’ll never want to leave my side.”
Joel's hands were deft as he slowly peeled away the rest of your dress, his touch both deliberate and reverent. His lips traced a path along your skin.
"Need someone to think for you, hm?" he murmured, his breath sending shivers down your spine.
"To make every decision, every choice for you. You just need to surrender to me, let me take care of everything. I'll make sure you’re completely taken care of, baby. Just relax and let me handle everything."
His fingers continued their slow, teasing exploration, each movement fueling his deep, perverted desire to have you wholly in his control.
Joel carefully lifted you into his arms, carrying you toward his bed with a purposeful stride.
He lowered you gently onto the mattress, his hands lingering on your waist as he took in the sight of you in nothing but your underwear.
His breath was warm against your exposed skin as he settled beside you. "You're so perfect," he murmured, his voice a mix of tenderness and unspoken hunger.
"Just relax. I'm going to make sure you feel good."
His fingers traced lightly over your exposed skin, each touch both soothing and charged with a possessive intensity.
The sight of you, vulnerable and exposed, ignited a primal hunger deep within him.
Every curve of your body seemed to call out to him, each subtle movement you made only heightening his intense need.
The way you looked, soft and eager, made his pulse race with anticipation.
He imagined the many ways he could take control, shaping your need and dependence to match his desires.
The thought of making you entirely his, of fulfilling his fantasies and watching you respond to his every touch, filled him with a dark, thrilling excitement.
His cock, leaking and pulsing inside of his - now too tight - pants.
He couldn't help but notice the way his body reacted to you-how every time you were near, his pulse quickened, and that familiar ache stirred deep inside him.
It was unexpected, really. At his age, he thought those days were behind him, but being around you had changed everything.
His body responded to you in ways he hadn't felt in years, his cock hardening almost every time you so much as smiled in his direction.
It was like his body refused to let him forget just how much he wanted you-constantly reminding him, throbbing with need whenever you were close.
He lowered himself to the bed beside you, his breath warm against your skin.
“You’re so perfect,” he murmured, his voice laced with both tenderness and an unspoken hunger.
“Just relax. I’m going to make sure you feel good.”
His lips brushed softly against your stomach, his kisses slow and deliberate, hinting at the path his hands and lips might take.
“Let me show you how much I care,” he whispered, his breath making your skin tingle with anticipation.
Joel's hands moved with deliberate patience, his touch growing more assured as he pressed your thighs to open.
"You don't have to think about a thing. Daddy's got you."
Your breath caught in your throat when the word left his lips—daddy. It hit you like a shock, a jolt of something both unfamiliar and undeniably magnetic.
You weren’t sure how to process it, weren’t even sure you should. But it stirred something deep inside, a part of you you hadn’t acknowledged in so long.
The air between you thickened, your heart racing as the room suddenly felt smaller, warmer.
You knew you should say something, stop this before it went further, but your body betrayed you, leaning into the heat of his touch, the promise in his voice.
The word echoed in your mind, twisting through your thoughts, confusing you with how natural, how right it sounded in his mouth.
You wanted to push him away, to ask what he thought he was doing, but you didn’t.
Instead, you stayed—silent, wide-eyed—because part of you wanted to hear him say it again.
Part of you wanted to be taken care of, to be small, vulnerable, safe in a way you hadn’t been since...
Your heart thudded in your chest, and you couldn’t deny how the word sent a rush of warmth through you, settling low in your pulsing cunt.
Joel's lips hovered just above your skin, each kiss trailing lower, igniting a soft, trembling need within you. You moaned.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” he whispered, his voice rough with desire as his hands gripped your hips gently, holding you in place.
“Daddy’s gonna take care of you.”
His mouth moved slowly, deliberately, his breath warm as he teased you, each moment making your body tense in anticipation.
“You’ve been needing this, haven’t you?” he murmured, “My poor baby“, the words sending a shiver down your spine.
“Needed daddy so bad, hm?”
He paused, his lips hovering dangerously close, his voice dropping lower.
He lowered himself with a deliberate slowness, his gaze locked onto you with a mix of fervent anticipation and adoration.
“Let me show you just how much I want to take care of you,” he whispered, his voice a husky murmur, slowly taking of your damp panties - leaning in close.
His prominent nose brushed teasingly against your pulsing clit, sending a shiver through your entire body.
Each delicate nudge felt almost like a promise, hinting at what was to come.
The sensation left you both confused and intrigued, your breath quickening as you struggled to process the mingling of shock and unexpected pleasure.
His tongue made a tentative, deliberate swipe against you, licking your pussy gently, sending a shiver up your spine.
The sudden warmth and wetness made you gasp, your body reacting instinctively to the unexpected sensation.
A mix of confusion and pleasure swirled within you as your breath hitched, your fingers gripping the sheets, trying to steady yourself amidst the overwhelming, unfamiliar pleasure.
Joel noticed your inexperience in every hesitant gasp and shiver. It only made his cock harden more in his Jeans.
Joel's focus remained intently on your little cunt, his every touch purposeful. He moved with deliberate slowness, savoring the reactions you elicited.
His tongue traced light, teasing patterns onto your twitching clit, his breaths warm and soft against your skin, making you shiver with every delicate touch.
His lips lingered on your most sensitive part, the sensation of a subtle, rhythmic suction, barely perceptible yet unmistakably suggestive, creating a wave of shivering anticipation through your whole body.
You, already, were so close to the edge; Joel could see it clearly.
Your breaths came in rapid, uneven gasps, and your body quivered in response to his touch. He noticed the way your muscles tensed and the subtle tremors that ran through you.
The urgency in your breaths and the way your legs slightly shook were unmistakable signals of your nearing climax.
He pulled back just enough to watch, relishing the heightened tension as your eyes fluttered open, a mix of frustration and anticipation evident on your face.
Joel’s voice was low and filled with a dark, seductive promise. “I can feel how close you are, baby,” he murmured, his breath warm against your skin.
“I want to feel you come undone, baby. I want to watch you lose control. Just give in and let Daddy take care of you.” His voice was a seductive whisper, every word designed to heighten your need, as his touch lingered, coaxing and teasing.
Slowly taking off his pants.
As Joel’s pants fell to his ankles, the sight that greeted you was both startling and mesmerizing. His leaking cock was noticeably larger than you had imagined, with a thickness that made your eyes widen in surprise.
The smooth, dark skin of his shaft was veined and visibly engorged, hinting at the intensity of his desire.
It was already leaking a glistening bead of pre-cum, which pooled at the tip and gave it an almost ominous sheen.
Joel's gaze never wavered from you, his eyes dark and filled with an unsettling mix of satisfaction and dominance.
“This is what you’ve done to me,” he said softly, his voice rough with need.
Cock jumping every time you looked down at him. “You’re the only one who makes me feel this way.”
You hesitated, a mixture of confusion and reluctance evident in your eyes. “I don’t know, Joel…”
He paused, his voice taking on a more commanding tone.
“If you don’t let go, baby, I might just have to leave you to figure it out on your own. You don’t want that, do you? Daddy’s here to take care of you, to make sure you’re okay. Trust me and let me help you.”
His words were wrapped in a mix of persuasion and a subtle edge of threat, aimed to coax you into surrendering.
You felt a flutter of apprehension mixed with a yearning need for his touch. His whisper, dripping with both authority and promise, coaxed you into a state of surrender.
“You don’t want me to leave, do you?” he murmured, his voice a low growl. “Say it, baby. Tell me you want me to stay.”
Your breath hitched as you struggled with the rising tide of vulnerability. Scared of being left alone again.
With a soft, hesitant voice, you finally whispered, „I want you to stay.”
His eyes darkened with a mixture of satisfaction and hunger as he heard you utter those words.
He cupped your face gently, his fingers tracing along your jawline as he continued to whisper soothingly, “That’s a good girl. Let me take care of you. Just relax and let me handle everything.”
His touch, though tender, carried an unmistakable edge of possessiveness, making it clear that he was in control.
He gazed at you with a warm, tender smile, his eyes softening as he brushed a stray lock of hair from your face.
“You’re so pretty, you know that?” he murmured, his voice gentle and affectionate.
“Such a good girl for me. I’m so proud of you.” He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, his tone filled with genuine adoration.
“You’re perfect, just the way you are. Let me take care of you.” His words were laced with a blend of endearment and possessiveness, wrapping you in a comforting cocoon of reassurance.
You felt a surge of warmth at his words, a mix of relief and comfort flooding through you.
You looked up at him, your eyes glistening with vulnerability.
A shy smile tugged at your lips as you leaned into his touch, finding solace in his praise.
The reassurance of being called "pretty" and "good girl" felt like a soothing balm, calming the storm of confusion and fear within you.
In his presence, despite everything, you felt a strange, tentative peace.
He leaned in again, his lips brushing softly against yours.
The kiss began gentle and tender, filled with a careful exploration of emotions.
His touch was both reassuring and passionate, gradually deepening as his arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer.
The heat between you intensified, the kiss becoming more urgent and consuming. Every caress of his lips was a promise of intimacy, blending comfort with an insistent desire.
As the kiss deepened, his hands began to explore your body with a gentle, possessive touch.
His fingertips traced a slow, deliberate path down your sides, moving closer to your chest.
With a careful, almost teasing touch, he caressed the curve of your breast through the fabric of your bra, savoring the way your body responded to his every movement.
His voice was low and commanding, his breath hot against your skin.
"Let me see all of you," he murmured, his hands already starting to slide your remaining clothes off with a mix of urgency and reverence.
"| want to see you all laid bare, just for me."
His eyes burned with intensity as he eagerly worked to reveal more of your body, his touch lingering with every movement.
As the fabric slipped away and your bare breasts were revealed, his eyes darkened with a primal intensity.
He gazed at you hungrily, his breath catching as he took in the sight. His fingers roamed eagerly over your skin, their touch lingering and possessive.
"God, you're incredible," he groaned, his voice dripping with desire.
"|'ve wanted to see you like this for so long." His hands explored your breast with a ferocity that left no doubt about his hunger, his gaze fixed on you with an almost obsessive fixation.
He couldn’t help but revel in the sight of you, so exposed and vulnerable before him.
His hands roamed possessively over your breasts, fingers tracing the curves and contours with a reverent touch.
His lips finally descended, capturing one of your nipples in a gentle, teasing kiss.
He nuzzled and licked, savoring the softness and warmth, his tongue flickering with a hunger that made his intentions clear.
Each delicate brush of his lips and tongue was an unspoken promise of his complete adoration, his perverted fascination with every part of you laid bare.
As Joel's tongue traced over your nipples, he couldn't help but let his mind wander.
The sensation of your skin against his lips, your warmth radiating through him and your sweet moans only fueled his thoughts.
He imagined you carrying his child, his own mark on you in the most intimate way.
Each teasing lick and gentle suck was accompanied by the fantasy of you pregnant, fulfilling a desire that went far beyond the present moment.
His mind drifted to the idea of you nourishing him in the most intimate way, the anticipation of tasting your milk driving him wild.
His cock throbbed incessantly, each pulse a painful reminder of just how much he yearned for you.
The ache grew with each touch, each kiss, until it became a near-constant throbbing, demanding release.
The sensation was overwhelming, an almost unbearable pressure that seemed to grow with every inch of contact, his desire for you mounting with every second
Joel’s breath grew ragged as he pulled back slightly, his eyes dark with desire.
He looked at you with a mix of need and intensity, his voice low and gravelly.
“Daddy needs to be inside you, sweet girl” he murmured.
He stared at you with a burning intensity, his voice a hushed whisper of urgency.
His movements were deliberate and filled with a raw desire that was impossible to ignore, his body pressing closer to yours with each passing moment, his breath hot and uneven against your skin.
You could feel the unmistakable pressure and heat of him as he positioned himself, at the opening of your tight pussy.
His eyes locked onto yours, a fierce determination in his gaze.
“I’ve waited for this moment,” he growled, his voice thick with desire.
Silently your voice whispered out to him, “Daddy,”
The sound of your voice seemed to unlock something deep within him.
Joel groaned as he pressed deeper, feeling the way your body clenched tightly around him.
The stretch was almost too much, and you could feel just how thick he was as he slowly sank inside, inch by inch. 
"God, you're so tight," he rasped, his voice thick with strain and something darker, almost possessive.
He paused, giving you a moment to adjust, his breathing heavy as he fought for control. 
"You feel so perfect around me," he murmured, his lips brushing your ear, the weight of him settling heavily against you. "Just relax, baby. Let me in." 
As Joel pushed deeper, your body reacted to the overwhelming sensation—a mix of pleasure and a sharp, lingering ache.
Each inch of him brought a new wave of heat that burned through you, the stretch almost too much, yet somehow not enough. 
You gasped, your body tensing under the pressure, unsure whether to pull away or draw him closer.
The pain ebbed with every slow movement, replaced by a growing warmth that made your pulse quicken.
“Easy,” Joel whispered, his voice thick and soothing, his lips grazing your neck.
“I know it’s a lot… but you’ll get used to it. Just let me take care of you. My sweet, pretty girl”
Your body responded instinctively, a wave of pleasure crashing over you with each deliberate thrust, making you feel completely and utterly exposed.
He pressed into you with a steady, deliberate force, each thrust deep and insistent.
The sensation of him moving inside you was both overwhelming and all-consuming, his control evident in every motion.
His thrusts were measured but powerful, pushing and pulling with an intensity that made each moment stretch, filling you completely.
The way he moved was both commanding and passionate, amplifying every sensation and hinting at his unrestrained desire.
Joel's sounds were raw and primal, each groan and sigh escaping him with a deep, guttural intensity.
His breaths came in short, ragged bursts, every exhale a mix of pleasure and need.
The way he grunted and muttered, his voice rough and strained, made it clear how much he craved and needed you.
His movements were urgent and powerful, driven by an almost feral desire that made him seem less controlled and more driven by pure, unfiltered instinct.
As he continued to move, he couldn't help but notice how perfectly you enveloped him.
Every shift and thrust seemed to be met with an almost intoxicating tightness, making each motion feel even more intense.
Joel's voice was rough, almost primal, as he spoke through gritted teeth.
"You're driving me crazy," he growled, the need in his voice palpable.
"I've been waiting for this, to have you just like this. You're so perfect, so tight...I want you to scream my name."
Each word was punctuated with a forceful thrust, his eyes dark with a perverted hunger.
"Tell me how much you need me, baby. Let daddy hear you."
You moaned softly, your voice trembling with a mix of desperation and surrender. "I need you so badly. I want you to take care of me, to give me everything."
His grip on you tightened, his breath hot and ragged against your ear.
"That's right. Tell me how much you crave me, how much you want me to make you feel good. I need to hear you beg for it."
Each thrust was deliberate, designed to push you to the edge of your limits, to make you feel every inch of his need.
He watched you intently, eager to hear every plea, every expression of your deep desire for him.
“Please,” you begged, your voice breaking with raw need. “Please, just—make me feel good. I need you so badly. I want you to take me completely.”
He thrust harder, a dark satisfaction in his eyes.
“Beg me. Tell me exactly what you want. How you want me to make you feel. I want to hear it.”
You whimpered, your body trembling under his relentless pace.
“I want you to touch me everywhere. Make me come so hard, I don’t know my own name. I need you inside me, every inch. Please, Daddy, don’t stop.”
His smirk widened, a cruel thrill in his voice.
“That’s it. Let me hear how much you need me. Tell me you’re mine.”
Your voice was a desperate, pleading whisper as you gasped, “Please, take over. I can’t think straight—just make me feel what I need.”
His eyes blazed with a primal hunger as he heard your desperate plea.
A low growl escaped him, filled with raw, unchecked desire.
"You want me to take over, baby?" he rasped, his voice thick with lust.
"'Il make you feel everything you need. Just give yourself to me completely."
His grip tightened, and his movements grew more urgent, driven by an insatiable need to dominate and fulfill your every desire.
His thrusts grew more insistent, every motion deliberate and filled with a primal urgency.
He pressed deeper, feeling the tightness of you enveloping him, each movement stirring an intense reaction within him.
His hands roamed over your body with an unrestrained hunger, lingering on your breasts as he traced their shape with a feverish touch.
He cupped them firmly, his fingers gently kneading and teasing, feeling your sensitive nipples.
He leaned closer, his voice dripping with possessiveness.
“You’re my perfect little girl, aren’t you? Let Daddy make sure you feel everything you’ve ever needed. I’ll take care of you in ways no man could ever do. No man ever did. “
Something about the way he said it - the promise, the claim - ignited something deep within you.
Your body responded to his words before your mind could catch up, and a wave of pleasure washed over you, muscles tightening around him as you trembled, overwhelmed by the release.
As Joel’s movements grew more insistent, his breathing quickened, the tension between you palpable.
His hands roamed over your body, his touch both commanding and tender.
Every thrust, every caress seemed to draw you both closer to the edge of an all-consuming release.
His eyes locked onto yours, dark with an intense, almost primal desire.
“Tell me you need me,” he rasped, his voice rough with the effort of holding back. “Tell me you’re mine.”
The pressure of his body against yours, the heat of his breath, and the intensity of his gaze all combined to overwhelm you.
You felt your own need rising, a reflection of his own desperate hunger.
“I need you,” you whispered, your voice trembling with both emotion and desire. “I’m yours.”
Joel’s grip tightened on you, his control slipping as his own climax approached.
“Good,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with a dark satisfaction. “That’s exactly what I wanted to hear.”
His movements grew more urgent, his body pressing against yours with an almost unbearable intensity.
You could feel the unmistakable heat of his cock, deep inside. The rhythm of his thrusts becoming more erratic as he neared the point of no return.
With a final, deep groan, Joel’s body tensed, and you felt the surge of his release, his warmth spreading inside you.
His hands held you tightly, his breathing ragged as he let out a low, satisfied sigh.
The moment was both primal and intimate, a profound culmination of the need that had driven you both.
As his movements gradually slowed, you could feel the lingering heat of his cum inside of you, a reminder of the intense connection you shared.
Joel’s voice, now soft and breathless, whispered against your ear. “I needed this… I needed you.” His hands continued their slow, lingering caress, as if unwilling to let go of the moment, of you.
You lay there, caught between the afterglow of your shared intensity and the deep, unspoken understanding of what you both had given
Joel turned to you, his gaze dark with an intensity that made you shiver.
His hand wandered, brushing lightly against your lips before sliding down to gently caress your breast, a possessive touch that left no room for misunderstanding.
You looked up at him, a mix of confusion and an unspoken need flickering in your eyes. “But what happens now?”
“You don’t have to worry about anything, baby,” he murmured, his voice low and seductive.
“Tonight was all about showing you just how much you mean to me—and how much I need you.”
Joel’s fingers traced idle patterns on your skin, his touch both tender and insistent.
“It means you’re mine,” he said, his voice dropping to a more intimate tone. “And it means I’m here to take care of everything. You don’t need to think about a thing.”
You shivered as his thumb brushed over your nipple, the sensation sending a jolt through you. “I just want to feel like I belong somewhere.”
Joel’s smile was a mix of satisfaction and possessiveness.
“You belong with me. I’ll make sure you never feel empty again. We both have our voids, but together, we fill them.”
His fingers continued their slow, teasing exploration, making your breath catch with each gentle touch.
“You’re not just filling a space, baby. You’re giving me everything I need.”
You felt a strange blend of relief and anticipation. “I guess... I needed this too. I can just let go.”
Joel’s hand lingered on your breast, his grip firm yet reassuring.
“That’s right. You don’t have to think about anything else. Just be here with me, and let me take care of you. I want to see you happy, feel you close.”
The way he spoke, his voice thick with desire, made you feel a mix of comfort and excitement.
His touch was a constant reminder of the connection you now shared, both physical and emotional.
As you settled into his embrace, you felt a strange sense of completeness, knowing that, in this moment, you were filling the emptiness for each other in a way that was both intense and deeply satisfying. It’s all gonna be okay. Right?
· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··
These two really need therapy! Hope y’all enjoyed x
Probably will only do oneshots & smut scenarios with these two fuckers- from now on.
Also, I had no beta, so if you see anything that needs correction, let me know!
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oldsoul007 ¡ 7 days ago
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not a lot, just forever
joel miller x reader
summary: joel keeps grieving about what could’ve been of you two had kids…
a/n: angsty but also fluffy
joel miller masterlist
Joel leaned against the weathered railing of the porch, the cool evening breeze ruffling his shirt as he watched y/n through the open door. She was inside the house, cradling Tommy and Maria’s baby in her arms, her soft laughter mingling with the gentle cooing of the infant.
The sight hit him harder than he expected.
He had seen y/n with children before—she was great with them, always patient, always so gentle. But seeing her hold that tiny, perfect little thing, with a look on her face that could only be described as tender longing, made something shift deep in Joel’s chest. It was a quiet ache, one that had been there for years but had never been so sharp before.
He knew that look. He had seen it in the way she held Sarah when she was younger, the way she’d always cared for the people around her. But now, watching her with Tommy and Maria’s baby, he realized something he’d never allowed himself to think too deeply about: the family she might’ve wanted—the life they could’ve had—was a dream that had been stolen from both of them by the outbreak.
Joel clenched his jaw, trying to swallow down the lump in his throat.
It wasn’t fair.
Not to y/n. Not to anyone, really. They had lost so much, so much that words couldn’t even begin to explain. But when he saw her, holding that baby, a different kind of loss settled over him, one that felt heavier than the weight of everything else.
He could never give her that. He could never be the man who could offer her the kind of future she deserved. He had tried, in the early days, to imagine a life beyond survival. But he knew better now. Every time he let his guard down, every time he allowed himself to hope for something, the world seemed to take it all away again. And this… this was one thing he could never give her—something simple, something pure: a family. A child of their own.
He pushed himself off the railing and took a deep breath. The ache in his chest was still there, gnawing at him, but he wouldn’t let it show. Not now. Not when y/n was happy, not when she was in a moment that brought her peace. She didn’t need him to carry that weight for her.
Stepping inside, he paused in the doorway, watching her with the baby in her arms. She was smiling down at the infant, her eyes soft with a mixture of affection and something Joel couldn’t quite name. She looked up and caught his gaze, her smile widening in that way that always made his chest tighten, even in moments like this.
“Hey,” I said softly, my voice warm and inviting. “Come on in. Maria said we could keep her for a little while longer.”
Joel nodded, his throat tight. He didn’t trust himself to say much, not with the lump still lodged there. Instead, he stepped closer, his footsteps quiet on the wooden floor.
He reached out, brushing a lock of hair from my face. I tilted my head slightly, my smile turning into something softer, understanding.
“I know,” I said quietly, reading him in a way only I could. “I know what you’re thinking.”
Joel gave a small shake of his head. “I don’t know what you mean.”
I didn’t push, just offered him a look that was equal parts sadness and understanding. “It’s okay, Joel,” I murmured, my hand reaching out to rest on his. “I’m okay. We’re okay. It’s just… a moment.”
He swallowed hard, his hand trembling slightly as he placed it over hers. “I should’ve been able to give you that,” he said before he could stop himself, the words spilling out before he could rein them in.
I was silent for a moment, my gaze flicking to the baby in my arms before meeting his eyes again. “You gave me so much more than that,” I replied, my voice steady but full of emotion. “You gave me your trust. Your love. And you gave me the chance to live again, to be here. That’s all I’ve ever needed, Joel.”
The words settled over him like a balm, soothing the raw ache that had been gnawing at him. He let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, and for the first time in what felt like forever, the heaviness lifted, even if just a little.
He looked at her, really looked at her—the woman who had stayed by his side through the worst of it all. And in that moment, he realized that he didn’t need to give her the things he’d lost. What mattered was the life they had now, the one they were building together, despite everything that had come before.
He took the baby from my arms, his hands steady as he held the tiny life against his chest. She smiled softly at him, the love in her eyes undeniable.
And for once, Joel allowed himself to believe that maybe this—just this—was enough.
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I sit on the couch, staring out the window at the setting sun, trying to settle the mix of emotions swirling in my chest. I know Joel’s been brooding; I could feel it even before he walked into the room. His footsteps are soft but heavy, his presence unmistakable as he steps inside
He doesn’t say anything right away, just stands there in the doorway. I can feel his eyes on me, on the empty bassinet where the baby had been sleeping earlier.
I don’t look at him. Instead, I say, “You’ve been quiet all day.”
He lets out a low sigh, stepping further into the room. “Just been thinkin’.”
I nod, knowing what’s coming but not sure I want to hear it.
“She is… somethin’ else, wasn’t she?” he says after a moment, his voice soft. “You looked good with her, y/n. Real good.”
I finally turn to look at him, leaning back into the couch. “She’s a sweet baby. But you know it’s not about her, Joel. Just say what you’re thinking.”
He hesitates, his eyes drifting back to the bassinet. “I can’t help it,” he finally says, his voice thick with emotion. “Holdin’ her, watchin’ you with her… I keep thinkin’ about what could’ve been. If the world hadn’t fallen apart. If we’d had a chance to…” He trails off, his voice catching. “To have a family of our own.”
My stomach twists, and I take a steadying breath. “Joel…”
He shakes his head, looking down at the floor. “I think about Sarah, about how things might’ve been different. I think about Ellie. And then I see you with that baby, and all I can think is… we never got the chance.”
I sit up, folding my hands in my lap. I know this pain. I feel it too, but I’ve had years to reckon with it, to make peace with what life took from us. “What do you want me to say, Joel?” I ask softly. “That I wish we could’ve had kids together? Of course I do. There was a time when I wanted that more than anything.”
He looks at me then, his face a mix of regret and longing, his hands still shoved deep into his pockets.
“But that’s not how life worked out,” I continue, my voice steady even as my heart aches. “And it’s okay to feel the loss of what could’ve been. But Joel, you’re all I need. You always have been.”
He stares at me for a long moment, his jaw tight, his eyes searching mine. “You mean that?”
I nod, giving him a small, sad smile. “I do. We’ve been through hell and back, Joel. And I wouldn’t trade what we have for anything. I just need you. That’s enough for me.”
Joel exhales slowly, like he’s been holding his breath. “I’m sorry, y/n,” he says quietly. “For not seein’ it sooner. For… not bein’ enough.”
I reach out, taking his hand in mine, squeezing it gently. “You are enough. You’ve always been enough. We’re here now, Joel. That’s what matters.”
The room falls quiet again, but the tension has eased. Joel sits down beside me on the couch, his shoulder brushing against mine. He doesn’t say anything else, and neither do I.
The bassinet is empty, but the space between us feels full—of love, of pain, of all the things we’ve lost and found together. And as the sun dips below the horizon, I lean into him, letting the silence say everything that words can’t.
“She’s lucky to have you watchin’ over her,” he says, his voice lighter now.
“And she’s lucky to have you around too,” I reply, a small smile tugging at my lips. “Uncle Joel has a nice ring to it.”
He chuckles, the faintest hint of a smile on his face. “Guess it does.”
We stand there for a moment, the weight of the past still there but just a little easier to carry. For now, that’s enough.
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18+ MDNI!!!!
NSFW under the cut
Soft Sex with Dabi
Dabi is not the most… open with his emotions.
He loves you, he knows it and so do you. He shows it in his own way.
He loves feeling like your protector, swears he’d kill anyone who would even dare to look at you wrong. He’s proven it before too, having burnt multiple guys who have tried hitting on you to ash.
He loves to show you off, having you sat comfortably in his lap during League meetings (much to Shigarakis displeasure) and making sure you’re securely in his arms when the league is lounging in the bar. They all need to know you’re his.
Most of all, he loves fucking you into his bed so hard that your makeup stays on his pillow and you can barely walk for days. That’s how he expresses his love the most. He’s rough and unforgiving, leaving marks and handprints on your body and bruising your cervix with every thrust.
Don’t get it twisted, you love when he does that too. You love him in all ways, but your expression tends to be much softer.
You care for the man who never got the attention he deserved and so desperately craved. In quiet moments you run your fingers through his box-dyed hair and massage his scalp until he eventually falls asleep against your chest, his relaxed expression almost giving him an innocent boyish look despite all his hardships.
You make sure he eats after missions, making him food so he can come home and relax, not having to think about his next meal.
You let him talk to you for hours about his life before he was “Dabi.” You’re the only one he wants to tell about it. He vents about his family, how they wronged him, how much he actually misses his mother.
You love him purely, in the softest way you possibly can, because you know he needs it.
So one night, when Dabi starts to slide his hands up your thighs and under your skirt in the middle of the bar, and the two of you get to making out on his bed, you make a proposition to him:
“Can I take care of you tonight, love?”
He lets out a little scoff at your statement before realizing that you’re serious. He’s not used to relinquishing control, and he’s definitely not accustomed to doing anything gentle.
“Babe, you know how I am. I’m gonna get restless the second you start to tease and you’ll end up pinned-“
“Just let me baby, I wanna try something…”
His eyes widen at your insistence. Never have you been so persistent at getting what you want in bed before. Every time before now had consisted of you giving yourself to him completely, letting him make a mess of you and claim you as his own.
“Jus’ wanna show you how much I love you, Dabi…”
He can’t say no to you. Not when you’re pleading this way. Looking down at him so sweetly from your place on his lap. Professing your love for him.
“Sure, doll, go ahead. But if I decide it’s not my style you’re getting flipped straight onto your stomach.”
You giggle at his “threat” and he thinks it’s the most angelic sound he’s ever heard.
Slowly but surely you begin to kiss down the scars on his neck, making your way to his collarbone and the bit of chest that his low cut shirt exposed.
You slide your hands under his shirt to feel his marred chest. Soft skin meeting rough scars with only a haphazardly placed row of staples patch it together.
A soft gasp leaves his lips as you grind softly down on his painfully hard bulge.
“You’re killin’ me doll face. Can’t just tease like this…”
“You’re really pretty, Touya.”
He stops in his tracks and stares into your eyes at the mention of that name. You’ve only called him that a few times before, never in bed, only ever when he was having one of his rare vulnerable moments.
You wanted to see him. All of him. Raw and unmasked and at your mercy. Not that you wanted to take advantage of him, no, quite the opposite.
You slowly lift his shirt above his head and push on his chest until his back meets the admittedly worn out mattress.
He looks at you like you’re the only thing in the world that could ever save him. Like you could forgive every sin he’s ever committed.
You kiss down his chest until you reach the button of his jeans. Instead of unbuttoning it and touching him where he needs you most, you reach to interlace your fingers with his.
He pauses before locking his digits in yours, reciprocating the incredibly soft action.
This isn’t his style. Not at all. Something in him aches at the gentleness. It almost feels like guilt.
He can’t seem to get a word out.
“Is this okay Touya?”
“Mmhm- keep goin doll…”
If he spoke just a word more he might have choked on it. You remove your dominant hand from his, still holding the other, and skillfully unbutton his jeans with one hand. Reluctantly he releases your other hand so you can pull his pants and boxers down.
“I’m not gonna suck you off, not just yet. Wanna be close to you love. Need to feel you inside of me…”
All he can do is nod as you straddle his hips and line him up with your entrance. As you slowly sink down onto him, you guide his hands to your waist.
“Hold onto me, grab me, squeeze me, whatever you want baby, just let me take care of you right now.”
For the first time in his relationship with you he feels like he has no clue what to do.
Well, that’s not entirely true.
He’s felt clueless about how to be a good boyfriend before. He never thought he could ever make someone happy, never thought he could be enough for someone to call him their love, their everything.
He felt clueless the first time you kissed him, before he even asked you to be his girl. It had never felt like that before. You had poured every ounce of care and compassion you had for him into that kiss and he could feel it all. The only thing he knew after that was that you had to be his. One way or another.
But he has never felt clueless when it came to you wrapped around him, taking him so sweetly. Not until now. Now he had no control, and that left him without any knowledge of what to do.
You lean down to kiss his forehead as you reach the base of his aching cock.
“You feel so good baby, always feel so good.”
Your breathing is heavy now and he can tell you’re losing your composure. A small smirk appears on his face as he guides his hands up your torso to softly squeeze your breasts.
“Can ya move now doll? Please?”
Never has Dabi begged. He swore off begging that day at Sekoto peak.
But he’d do anything for you.
You begin to slowly ride him, laying your chest against his while he wraps his arms around you in a tight embrace. Your speed increases as he kisses the top of your head.
“Fuck baby. Just like that doll. Please don’t stop… feels so good… I-“
“You’re so— ngh- fucking perfect Touya. Amazing. I love you so much.”
He can’t help but let a tear slip from his eye at your words. Given the context it shouldn’t be making him feel so sensitive.
But he is loved. You love him. Someone out there loves him. And that someone is giving every part of themself to him in this moment.
And consuming every part of him in the process.
“Fuck… y/n…I love you too.”
With that you clench around him, reaching your high and spurring on his release as well. You collapse against his chest to catch your breath.
You feel something wet fall onto your head.
“M’ sorry doll, don’t mean to get all fuckin’ soft on you n’ shit-“
“Don’t apologize. I love you. I mean it. Just wanted you to feel it.”
Dabi is crying, something you’ve never seen him do before, yet he smiles softly down at you.
“I dunno what I did to deserve ya doll.”
“You don’t have to do anything. You’re perfect how you are.”
You’re tearing up now too. He chuckles softly, wiping your tears with his thumb.
“Well shit. Now I’ve made you cry too. We should get cleaned up hm?”
You nod at his suggestion and kiss his wet cheeks.
“Wanna stay here for just a moment longer. Let me love on my man.”
His hand runs through your sweaty hair.
“I really do love you doll.”
“I love you too, but you already know that.”
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0omillo0 ¡ 5 months ago
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MODEL! HYUNJIN X FEM! MODEL! READER
autor’s note: hi! this is my first post, I hope you’ll like it!
warnings: none!! pure fluff
Hyunjin, a renowned Versace model and gifted artist, has grown used to the fast-paced world of fashion. But when Y/N, a new model, steps into the scene, her authenticity catches his eye. As their paths intertwine, Hyunjin finds himself drawn not just to her beauty, but to something deeper—especially when he discovers a personal connection to his art in her life.
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The lights above the runway glowed bright as you walked, your heart racing with every step. It was your first major show—Versace, no less—and the pressure of the fashion world felt like it was resting squarely on your shoulders. You kept your face composed, though. It was the life you had chosen, after all.
As you reached the end of the runway and struck your final pose, you caught a glimpse of someone standing backstage. Hwang Hyunjin. A name you had heard whispered many times, both in the modeling industry and beyond. He was already legendary as a Versace model—and as an artist. He stood with that ethereal grace, watching the runway with a calm confidence. His aura drew you in instantly.
Backstage, the models buzzed with excitement, but you found yourself scanning the room for Hyunjin. You weren’t sure why—maybe it was the effortless way he carried himself, or the way his expressive eyes seemed to speak without words. But there he was, standing near a rack of designer outfits, quietly sketching in a notebook.
He must have felt your gaze, because his eyes lifted from the page and met yours.
You blinked and quickly turned away, embarrassed to have been caught staring.
A moment later, you heard a voice behind you. “Nervous?”
Turning, you found yourself face-to-face with Hyunjin. His smile was small but warm, and it made your heart stutter. “A little,” you admitted, forcing yourself to breathe.
“You didn’t show it out there. You looked great.”
Your cheeks flushed. “Thanks. I wasn’t sure if I would survive that.”
He chuckled, his laughter soft and genuine. “We all feel that way at first. Trust me.”
You nodded, trying to keep your cool. “You were sketching something?”
“Oh,” he glanced down at the notebook in his hand, almost shyly, “yeah, just passing time. It’s nothing.”
“I bet it’s beautiful,” you said without thinking. His sketches were famous—everyone knew Hyunjin wasn’t just a model but an incredible artist. His works sold out faster than any runway show.
Hyunjin raised an eyebrow at your comment, looking a little surprised, but his smile grew just a bit wider. “Maybe one day you’ll see for yourself.”
---
Days turned into weeks, and as more Versace events brought you together, you and Hyunjin grew closer. What began as polite conversations evolved into genuine exchanges—talks about art, fashion, and life beyond the glitz and glamor. He was different from the others. Though he was breathtaking in every way, Hyunjin never acted like it. Instead, he carried himself with a quiet humility, a soul deeper than the world around him realized.
One evening, after a long day of fittings, you sat backstage, scrolling through your phone to relax. Hyunjin approached, as he often did these days, and sat beside you. His presence had become comforting.
"What are you looking at?" he asked curiously.
"Oh, nothing special," you said, not thinking much of it as you showed him your phone. But his eyes widened slightly when he saw your lock screen.
It was one of his paintings—a swirling combination of colors and emotion that you had seen in an exhibition once. You loved how raw and alive it felt, and you had put it as your wallpaper without realizing Hyunjin might ever see it.
"That’s... my painting," he said softly, his voice almost touched with disbelief.
You felt a sudden rush of heat rise to your face. "Oh my god, I—yeah, it is. I didn’t think you'd—uh, I really loved it. It just felt so... powerful. I hope that's not weird."
He stared at the screen for a long moment before meeting your eyes. His usual calm demeanor had shifted, and for the first time, you saw something vulnerable in his expression.
"It’s not weird," he murmured, his voice lower than usual. "It’s... actually really special."
His hand brushed against yours as he handed your phone back, and neither of you moved away. The air between you seemed to thicken with something unspoken.
"You know," Hyunjin began, his gaze dropping for a second before looking back up, "people don’t usually talk about my art like that. They just think of me as a model."
"I don’t," you said softly. "I think you’re an incredible artist."
Hyunjin looked at you like you had said something life-changing. His hand stayed close to yours, and you felt a magnetic pull between you, as if something deeper had just clicked into place.
"Thank you, Y/N," he whispered, his voice almost fragile. "I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that."
---
As weeks passed, the connection between you and Hyunjin only deepened. The fashion shows continued, the flashing lights, the crowds, the interviews—but somehow, when you were with him, it all faded into the background.
He would seek you out between shoots, and you found yourself drawn to him in ways you couldn’t explain. His attention to detail, the way he viewed the world through an artistic lens, the kindness in his words—it made your heart race every time you saw him.
One evening, after a long day of rehearsals, the two of you found yourselves alone in the studio. Hyunjin was working on a painting in the corner while you sat nearby, watching him with quiet admiration. He glanced at you every so often, his eyes soft.
"Can I ask you something?" he said, breaking the silence.
"Of course."
"Why my painting?" he asked, his voice careful, but curious. "Out of all the art you could’ve chosen, why mine?"
You thought for a moment before answering. "Because it felt real. When I saw it, I felt something… like it was a piece of your soul. It wasn’t just a pretty picture—it had emotion, depth. I could see you in it."
Hyunjin stared at you for a long moment, something intense flickering in his gaze. He set his brush down and took a slow step closer.
"You saw me in it?" he repeated, his voice softer now, almost vulnerable.
"Yeah," you nodded, holding his gaze. "I did."
Hyunjin's breath hitched, and in that moment, something shifted between you. He reached out, gently taking your hand. His touch was warm, and his thumb brushed over your skin as if testing whether this was real.
"I see you too, Y/N," he whispered, his voice trembling with emotion. "More than you know."
You stared up at him, your heart pounding as he stepped closer. His face was inches from yours now, his gaze flickering down to your lips before meeting your eyes again. And in that quiet space, where words seemed unnecessary, Hyunjin leaned in, capturing your lips in a soft, lingering kiss.
The world faded away, and for a moment, there was only the two of you—two artists, two souls, finding each other in the midst of the chaos.
———
I hope you enjoyed this story! Requests are open!!
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sound-of-scoups ¡ 3 days ago
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Moth To A Flame | JJK & KMG | 03
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Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Female!Reader x Kim Mingyu  Genre|tags: Idol!au, series, established relationship, infidelity, lots of angst, lots of drama, smut, maybe fluff.  Word count: 15.8k + Rating: Explicit adult content (MINORS DNI). Chapter warnings: Angst at its finest, like, literally this is pure and raw angst (poor baby is going through it), mentions of Jungkook smoking, crying, everyone here needs therapy, mentions of Jungkook not handling the BTS hiatus very well, arguments, abuse of power by a superior (?). Lemme know if there's more. A/N: 1. Time to get some questions answered...; 2. As ARMY, it's so strange/painful, but at the same time, relieving, to write about the things that happened in 2022 with BTS, knowing that it's already 2025 and the war is over; 3. I have no idea when chapter four will come out, I decided it will be a surprise, so it can come out tomorrow or in two weeks hehe.
Summary: Four years ago, you crossed paths with a charming member of the K-pop group Seventeen during their tour stop in Osaka. The two of you shared three intense, unforgettable days before life took you in different directions. It was painful for both of you, but you knew you couldn’t take things any further and had to say goodbye. Now, back in Seoul for good, you’re in a new relationship with another idol: Jeon Jungkook—whose charm and stability make him everything you thought you wanted. You are very much in love with him, and as your connection deepens, it feels like your life is finally falling into place. That is, until you meet one of your boyfriend’s best friends and are stunned to discover it’s the same man you fell for in Osaka all those years ago. As buried emotions resurface and secrets begin to unravel, you find yourself torn between these two men, caught in a whirlwind of love and conflict, testing the boundaries of loyalty and the choices that could change everything. 
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The moment you walked out of HYBE headquarters, your entire body seemed to spiral into a state of complete mania. You paced around the block for a few moments, overwhelmed by an intense urge to scream and laugh uncontrollably—all at the same time.
Your phone showed multiple missed calls from Jungkook, likely eager to know how the meeting had gone, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to answer any of them. You didn’t know how to tell him the news without sounding like you were on the brink of psychosis for reasons entirely unrelated to the happiness of landing the biggest opportunity of your career.
Instead, after minutes of aimlessly wandering the streets like someone who had just escaped from a psychiatric hospital, you made the only choice that felt right: you called your best friend.
“Wait,” Dahee said, holding up a hand to stop you mid-sentence, her steps faltering as if the physical pause could help her process everything you’d just unloaded on her. “Mingyu? As in Osaka Mingyu?”
You nodded, taking another lick of your strawberry ice cream. “Yep.”
You nodded, taking another lick of your strawberry ice cream. “Yep.”
Initially, you both met at your usual spot—a cozy restaurant downtown, tucked by a window that overlooked the bustling street. The aroma of barbecue wafted around you, blending with the soft clink of dishes and the murmur of voices. You and Dahee dove into a meal not much after, her excitement about her upcoming wedding filling the air immediately. She animatedly described the flowers, venues, and music with her eyes sparkling, and you simply couldn’t bring yourself to interrupt her with the chaos that inhabits your mind.
As the hours passed and you started walking together along the Han River, Dahee finally looked at you, curiosity shining in her eyes. With a gentle nudge, she asked what was going on with you. Her sincerity was unmistakable, and after a steadying breath, you began unraveling the turbulence of your life events, spilling every detail you’d been holding back all day.
Dahee’s expression after you finished telling her everything was like you’d sprouted two extra heads right there on the riverbank. She blinked a few times, processing each piece of information you’d just handed her. Finally, she shook her head, eyebrows raised.
“Oh my God,” she whispered, her voice barely above a gasp as she tugged you toward one of the benches along the shore, her hand gripping your arm tightly. “First of all, I’m hurt that you never told me that Mingyu from Osaka was the Kim Mingyu.”
“I couldn't, babe,” You shrugged, leaning back comfortably against the bench. “Seventeen's legal team made me sign an NDA. I couldn't even be telling you this.” 
You felt a pang of frustration as you recalled the weight of that document, the way it had silenced your thoughts and feelings about everything that had happened four years ago between the two of you. 
Dahee’s jaw dropped, her mouth opening and closing a few times before she finally found her voice. “An NDA? Seriously?”
You nodded, gaze shifting to the river, its calm surface contrasting sharply with the turmoil inside you. “I couldn’t say a word to anyone about what happened. I couldn’t reach out to him. Hell, I wasn’t even allowed to be in the same country as him for years.”
The words slipped out of you like a confession, each one weighted with the years of secrets you’d held inside, now finally spilling free.
The pain of knowing he had chosen this path remained buried deep within you. You still felt naive for believing in everything he had said and promised that morning before you went your separate ways. Four years had passed, and while you were no longer the person you once were, and thought the green light of forgiveness had already been lit, even if only on your end, it still hurted.
Out of the corner of your eye, you watched as Dahee studied your face, brows knitted together. “I thought NDA’S were just myths.”
“Oh, they’re real, all right,” you replied, a bitter smile touching your lips. “And terrifying.”
“How did they even ban you from being in the same country as him?” Dahee asked, her eyes wide with disbelief. “That is incredibly so unfair.”
“It was part of the NDA. They included a clause that forbade me from trying to contact him or even being in the same place as him for a certain period of time,” you said, taking another bite of your ice cream. “They wanted to protect his image, to keep the media from blowing anything out of proportion. To not make a big thing out of something insignificant.”
Those exact words that came out from his manager’s mouth, hitting you like a slap across the face and reverberating in your mind with an almost cruel precision for years. You could only guess that you were insignificant enough to be erased from his life, but important enough to warrant a whole legal agreement about it. 
Probably what he thought too.
“I didn’t have a choice; it was either that or risk legal action.” You completed it.
Dahee stared at you, completely dumbfounded, her jaw slack as she tried to process what you’d just said. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, and buried her face in her hands for a moment before letting out a muffled groan.
“That’s insane. How do you even enforce something like that? Did they just expect you to… what? Erase him from your memory like he’s some kind of ghost?”
“Pretty much,” you replied bitterly, taking the last bite of your ice cream. “Until last year, at least.”
“That's why you didn't come back sooner,” she said softly, her eyes searching yours for reaffirmation.
You nodded, a rueful smile playing on your lips. “Yeah.”
Dahee let out a low whistle, leaning back against the bench. “Wow. That explains so much. And now,  you’re telling me that the biggest opportunity of your career just so happens to be working with him? Talk about fate having a sick sense of humor, bestie.”
“Exactly," you muttered, dragging your hands down your face in exasperation. "It's like the universe is laughing at me. 'Oh, you're finally moving on? Cool, let me drop Mingyu right back into your life for funsies.'”
“And no one at HYBE thought this might be, I don’t know, a tiny bit problematic for the two of you?”
“I don’t think they know, or even care. Pledis wasn’t part of HYBE back then. So to them, I’m just another freelancer with a decent portfolio,” you let out a dry laugh, shaking your head. “I think no one there remembers what happened between us.”
Dahee sighed deeply. “I’m so sorry, babe,” her expression softened. She reached for your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “That sounds incredibly painful to hold to yourself.”
You felt a lump form in your throat as you nodded, grateful for her support right now. “It’s been a struggle. I thought keeping busy would help me forget, but seeing him again…” 
You trailed off, unable to find the words to fully explain the emotions crashing through you. Memories you thought you’d buried deep had come rushing back with such force it felt like you’d been blindsided for four years. 
Dahee’s grip on your hand tightened, her voice firm yet gentle. “You shouldn’t have to go through this alone, you know. Why didn’t you didn’t tell me the second you connect the dots about his connection with Jungkook?”
“I didn’t know what to do, to be honest. Considering how everything went down, I… thought he’d forgotten about me, Hee.”
She raises an eyebrow at you. “And he didn’t?”
You hesitated, biting your lip before shaking your head. “No.”
That much you were sure, since he hadn’t left you any room to think otherwise. It was clear in the way he looked at you, like he wanted to ask a thousand questions but held himself back, respecting Jungkook's presence beside you. The way he kept conversation, the way he and his friends talked about Osaka and referred to you, even without knowing it was you. It was almost like he wanted you to see he still cared, but didn’t want to be direct about it. 
You just couldn't understand why.
“Did he say something to you? Otherwise you wouldn't be thinking about it.”
You hesitated again, the words lingering on the tip of your tongue. Maybe Dahee was right—if nothing had happened, if he hadn't followed you to the bathroom, if he hadn't asked to talk, if he hadn't looked at you like that, as if it were the first time he was seeing you in his life, or said us that way, maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t still be dwelling on it.
"He asked if we could talk.”
Dahee straightened up, her expression a mix of curiosity and cautious concern. “And what did you say?”
You shrugged, fidgeting with the edge of your coat and looking away from her. “That I would think about.”
You could feel her gaze studying you carefully, her faze was sharp but not unkind. Dahee sighed deeply and you held your breath for a second, believing you were going to get scolded by your best friend for having allowed even the smallest space to open, giving the guy who had broken your heart in the worst possible way a sliver of hope that he might talk to you again. 
“So let me get this straight,” she started, planting the palms of her hands on her own legs, the marquise-shaped diamond of her engagement ring shining brightly. “Mingyu, the guy who allegedly tried to erase you from his life and left you with a suitcase full of unresolved emotions and the biggest heartbreak of your life, wants to talk. And you didn’t say no, but you didn’t say yes either.”
“Pretty much,” you admitted, feeling the weight of it all press down on you again.
The fact that he wanted to talk set off a cascade of flags in your mind. What could he possibly want from you now? Why, after all these years, did he choose this moment to break the silence? Hadn't he been the one to make the decision for both of you all those years ago? Was it because he saw you with Jungkook that your ego couldn't handle it?
Deep down, you knew he wasn't like that. You knew perfectly well that he wasn't that kind of person. But now your brain was already working with far-fetched answers to the confusing questions surrounding it and the only person who could answer them was the one you weren't ready to face yet. 
Dahee let out a sharp laugh, shaking her head. “This is the kind of plot twist I'd expect from a bad drama, not your life. Are you okay, though? Like, how are you feeling now?”
You took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. 
The truth was, you weren’t allowing yourself to feel anything, while at the same time, you were feeling everything—the good, the bad, the messy ones. It was a paradox that seemed to stretch you thin, tearing at the edges of your composure. For the longest time, you found yourself torn between two extremes: the desperate yearning to see him every day, and the equally fierce desire to never lay eyes on him again. 
Sitting there by the river, with Dahee’s presence beside you, it was the first time in years you allowed yourself even a sliver of vulnerability about this subject. The chaos of seeing Mingyu again, of being thrust into a situation you’d worked so hard to avoid, made your defenses feel paper-thin. And now, after landing the job that could very well change your life, you felt like that fragile piece of paper was precariously floating on water, ready to dissolve into nothingness.
The idea of starting fresh as Seventeen’s stylist should have excited you—it did excite you—but the weight of the past lingered, heavier than you wanted to admit. You knew that from now on, there would be no avoiding Mingyu. In fact, you would be seeing him far more than you ever could have imagined over the past four years.
Seeing Mingyu again wasn’t just a footnote; it was a headline, bold and unavoidable.
How could he suddenly reappear in your life and completely upend everything? How could he suddenly seem to be everywhere?
These thoughts wouldn’t stop circling, growing louder with every passing minute under the moonlight. It felt like a cruel twist of fate, like the universe had been waiting for the perfect moment to throw your carefully built world into disarray. You had spent years carefully locking away every memory, every feeling tied to him, convincing yourself it was better this way. That his absence was a closed chapter, one that didn’t need reopening. Yet here you were, about to walk into a reality where he wasn’t just present—he was unavoidable.
“I don't know. I mean, I thought I was okay. I’ve spent years trying to move past it, convincing myself it didn’t matter anymore. But seeing him again… it’s like all the progress I made just evaporated.”
After everything, you were the only one who ended up with wounds to bind. And now it looked like it was all open wide while someone dumped a bag of salt into it.
“And the worst part? I’m not even angry at him anymore. I’m just… sad. Sad that it ended the way it did, sad that I still don’t fully understand why,” you said softly, your voice barely audible over the gentle lapping of the water against the shore. “But then there’s Jungkook, who is perfect, and makes everything feel so magical, so right and…” you paused, letting the morning's events replay in your mind. “He asked me to move in with him this morning.”
Dahee froze, her eyes widening and mouth falling open in astonishment.. “Wait, what?” she finally said, her voice tinged with disbelief. “How did you even respond to him?”
“I didn’t,” you admitted, letting out a long sigh and pressing the heels of your palms against your eyes. “I also told him I’d think about it.”
Dahee groaned, rubbing her temples like she was getting a headache just from hearing everything. “Okay, so Mingyu reappears, bringing all your unresolved trauma back to the surface, and a week later, Jungkook, your incredible, loving boyfriend who would probably lasso the moon for you, asks you to move in with him?”
“That sums it up,” you said with a weak laugh, though there was no humor behind it, and taking your hands from your eyes to your hair, restlessly. "Two weeks ago, I wouldn’t have hesitated to say yes, Hee. Damn it, why does everything feel like it's moving so fast now?"
“Babe, that's… huge,” she murmured, gaze softening again with understanding. “Like, life-changing huge. Of course it feels fast. You’ve got a whole lot of emotions to process, and now this. No wonder you’re feeling overwhelmed.” 
You blinked rapidly, the lump in your throat threatening to spill over into tears. It was actually a surprise that you hadn't shed any tears yet today. “I mean, I should be happy, right? Jungkook is everything I ever wanted and it took me so long to feel like this again after Mingyu. But now…”
“It’s like you’re second-guessing things because of Mingyu.” Dahee finished your sentence as if she’d read your mind. 
“Yeah.” You buried your face in your hands. “It feels like I’m being pulled in two different directions, and I don’t know which one is going to tear me apart first.”
The words hung in the air, raw and heavy, as your chest tightened with the weight of your own admission. It wasn’t just about a choice—it was about the uncertainty, the guilt. 
On one hand, you did want to say yes to Jungkook because he’s everything you’ve ever wanted, and you know he loves you, just as much as you love him. But on the other hand… there’s Mingyu. And it's not like you're thinking about going down that road again, because you're not. But just the idea of ​​him being a part of your life again is enough to throw you completely off balance.
Dahee reached out, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Have you told Jungkook anything yet?”
You shook your head, biting your lip. “I haven't.” You exhaled shakily, lowering your hands and staring at the calm river in front of you. 
How do you even begin to explain this to him? 
'Hey babe, remember how I told you I had a complicated past? Surprise! My ex-situationship is Kim Mingyu, your best friend, and we’re going to be seeing each other almost every day now. Do you still want me to move in?’
“I’m scared, Hee,” you admitted, your voice trembling. “I just… I’m terrified of how he’ll react. What if he thinks I’m not over Mingyu? What if this ruins everything?”
Dahee frowned, tilting her head as she regarded you with a mixture of concern and resolve. “But you’re not holding onto Mingyu, right?” she searches for your face, and when you say nothing, she asks, her tone turning more serious, “I mean, how do you actually feel about him?”
Mingyu.
Mingyu.
How did you feel about Mingyu? It wasn’t an easy answer. One you were still working to figure out. Just his name alone brought a flurry of emotions you didn’t want to confront. Guilt, anger, sadness, longing—all of it muddled together, making it impossible to think straight.
“I…”  you admitted finally, your voice barely above a whisper. You looked away, focusing on the ripples in the river as if they might offer some clarity. “I don’t know.”
Dahee didn’t push, giving you space to sort through the chaos in your head. But the silence wasn’t comforting—it felt like an interrogation room, the weight of the truth pressing down on you.
“It’s not that I’m still in love with him,” you finally said, your voice barely audible. “It’s just… seeing him bring back everything I tried so hard to bury. The what-ifs, the unresolved feelings, the stupid hope that maybe, somehow, he didn’t forget about me too.”
“I’m not gonna lie,” she started, her tone playful. “For a long time, I thought the guy from Osaka was your imaginary friend or something.” You laughed at her effort to lighten the mood, grateful for her attempt to break the tension within you. “The way you talked about him back then, it was like he’d disappeared into thin air. Poof.”
You sighed, the weight of your thoughts settling in as you laid your head into her shoulder. “Maybe it would have been easier if he had.”
Dahee let out a soft hum, her hand gently rubbing your arm as the two of you sat in silence for a moment. The city lights reflected on the surface of the river, casting a shimmering glow that felt oddly soothing despite the storm of emotions swirling within you.
“Maybe,” she said finally, her voice quieter now.
You glanced at her, a small, wry smile tugging at the corner of your lips. “Do you think I’m a horrible person?”
She shook her head immediately, her expression softening.
“Not even close,” Dahee said firmly.”I think you are someone who has never gotten closure from your past.”
You looked down, letting her words settle over you like a balm. They didn’t erase the turmoil inside, but they softened the edges, making it feel a little less insurmountable.
Closure? What's that like?
“I just…” you began, voice trembling. “I don’t want to hurt Jungkook. He’s... he’s everything. And I’m scared that even considering talking to Mingyu is betraying him. I love Jungkook so much, Hee. He’s everything to me and I’m scared shitless of losing him.”
Dahee sat silently for a moment and her gaze drifted to the river. You could almost see her mind turning, sorting through the weight of your words and the emotions you’d finally allowed yourself to express, raw and unfiltered for the first time in ages.
“Listen, you don’t owe Mingyu closure. Not after what he and the company put you through. But you do owe it to yourself to figure out how you want to handle this. Whether that’s keeping things strictly professional or finally getting the answers you deserve.”
Her gaze seemed to be piercing your soul. You knew that no one was better at listening to your mental confusion than her, and you couldn't be more grateful that you had chosen to turn to her first.
“I do think you should give yourself some credit. You’ve been blindsided in a massive way, and anyone in your position would feel a little unsteady.” Dahee gave you a look that was equal parts stern and compassionate. “However, you need to talk to Jungkook about this. Not about Mingyu specifically, maybe, but about how you’re feeling. He loves you, anyone with eyes can see that. He deserves to know before this becomes an even bigger mess.”
You swallowed hard, her words hitting a little too close to home. Deep down, you knew she was right. Jungkook deserved honesty, even if it scared you to lay everything bare.
“I don’t even know where to start,” you murmured, your fingers curling into fists in your lap. “How do you tell someone you love that you’re suddenly tangled up in unresolved feelings from the past without making it sound like you’re questioning your relationship with them?”
Dahee let out a soft laugh, shaking her head. “You’re overthinking it, babe. Just tell him what you told me: that seeing Mingyu again threw you for a loop, but it doesn’t change how you feel about him.”You stared at her, the simplicity of her suggestion making your chest ache. Maybe it really was that simple—if you didn’t let fear complicate things further.
“And what about Mingyu?” you asked hesitantly, the name tasting bitter on your tongue. “Do I... talk to him? Or do I just pretend he’s not there and hope this whole thing goes away?”
“That depends,” Dahee’s expression hardened slightly, her lips pressing into a firm line. “If he wants to apologize, maybe hearing him out could give you some closure. But if he’s just trying to wiggle his way back into your life with no good reason, you don’t owe him anything.”
You exhaled, the weight of her words settling into your chest. She was right, as always—but that didn’t make any of this easier.
“I don’t even know if talking to Mingyu will give me the answers I’m looking for. Don’t know if I’m ready to hear them either,” you admitted. “What if it just makes everything worse?”
Dahee tilted her head, her expression thoughtful. “Or what if it gives you the closure you need to finally move forward? You can’t control how it turns out, but avoiding it forever isn’t going to help either. Sometimes the only way out is through, babe.”
The thought both terrified and comforted you. Could you face Mingyu again, knowing how much he had hurt you—and how much you’d tried to move on? Could you really hear whatever it was that he needed to say without letting it unravel the life you’d built?
“I guess the question is,” Dahee continued, her voice softer now, “are you ready to let go of the past? Because if you are, maybe this conversation is exactly what you need to do.”
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After your conversation with Dahee, you spent a few minutes alone in your studio-slash-apartment, carefully sorting through your thoughts until everything felt perfectly clear. You had finally made up your mind about telling Jungkook the whole truth, convinced that he deserved to hear all of it from you, and by all of it, you meant all of it, including your hesitations regarding the biggest opportunity of your career and why. 
No more secrets. No more running from your past. 
Still, even though you were certain of your decision, stepping out of the elevator in Jungkook’s building, you couldn’t ignore the nagging feeling that the road ahead was about to become much more complicated. 
Could he handle all of it? Could you handle laying it all out for him?
It wasn’t just about the past; it was about the future, too. The idea of moving in together, of merging your lives more deeply than ever before, felt both exhilarating and terrifying. If you said yes, would this be the start of something even more beautiful than you already had now, or would the ghosts of your past threaten to tear it all apart? 
Your mind has been your worst enemy lately, and you knew that. It felt like the only things occupying it were unanswered questions and nagging insecurities. It was as if you had regressed four entire years of therapy to deal with things like that. 
The hallway on the top floor of the building where Jungkook lived was silent as you typed in the password and let yourself into the apartment. The familiar beep of the keypad was followed by the faint click of the door unlocking, and you stepped inside. 
Almost immediately, an excited Bam darted toward you, his nails clicking against the wooden floor. His dark eyes sparkled with recognition, and he let out a happy bark, throwing his front paws at your legs in a determined effort to reach your face. You laughed softly, crouching down to greet him.
“Hi, my baby,” you cooed, running your hands over his silky fur as his thin tail wagged furiously. “Did you have fun with uncle Junghyun today?”
Bam responded with an enthusiastic lick to your cheek, making you giggle despite the heaviness of your thoughts. You stayed there for a moment, scratching behind his ears and pressing a quick kiss to the top of his head, letting his boundless energy soothe some of your nerves.
Straightening up, you glanced toward the living room, where the glow of Jungkook’s mood light projector cast a soft, familiar warmth. Looking around, you saw that the television was paused in some reality show, and somewhere in the apartment, you could also hear the soft melody of an R&B song somewhere, although Jungkook was nowhere to be seen. 
“Bamie, where’s appa?” you asked sweetly, slipping off your shoes, setting your bag and phone on the console, noticing now that it was out of battery. Bam tilted his head at your question, then turned and trotted toward the hallway, as if to guide you. Smiling, you followed him through the apartment, your own footsteps muffled by the plush rugs beneath your feet.
The nerves began to creep back as you walked towards Jungkook's room, your heart picking up speed. You knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but the thought of holding back from him felt even worse. And you also knew that, despite your fear, he deserved all your honesty. 
Your footsteps faltered as your ears registered the sound of a soft sniffle coming from Jungkook’s room. The weight in your chest shifted, no longer nerves there but a pang of worry. You stood still for a moment, your fingers brushing the edge of the door frame as you leaned closer to listen.
“Jungkook?” you called out softly, your voice just above a whisper. His name hung in the air, but there was no immediate response, just the faint rustle of fabric and a muffled sound that could have been a shaky exhale.
Pushing the door open further, you stepped inside and were met with a sight that made your heart twist. Jungkook was sitting on the edge of his bed, his elbows resting on his knees, and his head hung low. One hand raked through his dark hair in a way that seemed almost frantic, while the other clutched at his phone. His broad shoulders were hunched, and even in the dim light, you could see the slight tremble in them.
“Kookie,” you said again, your voice firmer this time but still gentle. Bam brushed past your legs, padding over to Jungkook and nudging his knee with his nose. Jungkook glanced up, startled, his wide, watery doe eyes meeting yours for a brief moment before he quickly wiped at his face, as if trying to erase the evidence of his tears.
“Oh, hey, babe,” he mumbled, his voice thick and strained as he forced a small, unconvincing smile. “Didn’t hear you come in.”
You crossed the room in a few quick steps, kneeling in front of him to meet his gaze. “What’s wrong, baby?” you asked softly, your hands instinctively reaching out to rest on his knees. “Why are you crying?” 
“It’s nothing,” he said, shaking his head as if to dismiss your concern, but the crack in his voice betrayed him. He looked away, biting down on his bottom lip as his phone slipped from his hand and landed on the bed beside him. “I just… It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid if it’s making you feel like this,” you countered gently. Your mind raced through every possible scenario, trying to understand what could have left him like this. “You know you can talk to me, right?”
He nodded but hesitated, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed hard. You ran your hands comfortingly through his damp hair, realizing that he must not have gotten out of the shower long ago, since the towel was still on the bed, and he was wearing only sweatpants.
“Did I do something?” you asked, unsure if the tears could have anything to do with what had happened in the kitchen this morning.
Jungkook shook his head immediately, his eyes widening as he met your gaze again. “No, no, baby, it’s not you. It’s not anything you did. I swear.” His words were rushed, almost desperate, as if the thought of you blaming yourself had pulled him out of his emotional haze for a moment. “You could never…”
Relief washed over you, but the worry remained as you watched him struggle to find the words. His warm hands came up to cover yours where they rested on his knees. He gave them a gentle squeeze, his thumb brushing against your skin as if grounding himself with your presence.
“Then what is it?” you asked softly, leaning in closer so your faces were only inches apart. “Please, Kook. I hate seeing you like this. Let me help.”
He inhaled deeply, his shoulders rising and falling as he tried to steady his breathing. For a moment, the room was quiet except for the faint hum of the music playing in the background. It seemed like he might brush it off again, but then he sighed heavily, his gaze finally meeting yours. His brows knitted together, his lips trembled, and fresh tears pooled in his reddened eyes. 
“I’m scared,” he whispered.
“Scared of what, baby?” your voice was soft as you massage the back of his hands with your thumbs. 
“Of the hiatus,” he admitted quietly. "Of what it can do to the members and me. Of having to do it all alone.”
Your heart sank at his confession. The weight of Jungkook's fears settled heavily in the room, making your own chest tighten. You should’ve known. It should’ve been your first thought, after seeing him struggling with it alone for days, refusing to share it with you; to worry you, just because he was that kind of person—the one who would never bother anyone with his problems.
But just as you had already predicted earlier, now that BTS were going to take a break to focus on their solo projects plus the military service that would start by the end of that year with Seokjin, Jungkook wasn't handling this in a very healthy way. He was sleeping poorly, smoking more, and skipping meals. He thought you didn’t notice, but there was nothing about him you didn’t see, and Jimin made sure to keep you updated on everything when you were apart.
You knew he enjoyed being active, being with the members, and doing what he loved most, giving it his all. You also knew that the idea of not being able to do that for a certain amount of time scared him more than he was willing to admit. Jungkook had a featuring song to be released with Charlie Puth in less than a week, and you knew he was feeling pressured by it. You just wished he had voiced his concerns before it got to this point. 
Reaching up, you gently cupped his face, brushing away the tears that slipped down his cheeks with your thumbs.
“Baby,” you murmured, your voice trembling with empathy as you shifted closer. “You don’t have to do it alone. You’re not alone.”
His eyes closed at your touch, his lashes wet with tears. “It feels like I am sometimes,” he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. “The members… we’re all doing our own things, and I know it’s what we need, but it’s hard. I’m used to having them by my side, to leaning on them when it gets too much. Now, it’s just going to be… me.”
“But you have them,” you reminded him gently. “Even if you’re working on your own projects, they’re still your brothers.”
“I know that," he said, his lips trembling a little. “But what if I don't know who I am without them?”
“Then this is the moment you'll find out, love,” you said softly, your hands still cradling his face. “Trust me, this isn’t about losing who you are; it’s about finding new parts of yourself, ones you didn’t even know were there.”
He opened his eyes, his gaze searching yours as if trying to find reassurance in your words. “What if I mess up?” he asked, his voice cracking under the weight of his doubt. “What if I’m not good enough without them?”
“You won’t mess up,” you said with conviction, pressing your forehead gently to his after kissing the tip of his nose. “You’re talented, Jungkook. The most talented person I know. And more than that, you’re hardworking, dedicated, and passionate. Those things don’t disappear just because you’re standing on your own for a while. You’re more than enough, with or without BTS.”
For a moment, he didn’t respond, his eyes fluttering shut again as he took a shaky breath. Then, he nodded, his hands reaching up to grasp your wrists gently, as if he was trying to ground himself again. 
“I don’t want to let anyone down. I don’t want to disappoint them, ARMY or you. I don't want these speculations to become true.”
The looming uncertainty of BTS's hiatus had been on everyone’s mind since Tuesday. It was an ongoing topic across the country and the world. Rumors of disbandment flooded social media and the news, but just as the members, you knew they weren’t true. They were still working on group projects, filming content, and recording songs; still together. 
The difference was that now they would have the freedom to explore their individuality and show the world who they truly were as artists. 
“First of all,” you whispered softly, placing a kiss on his temple. Jungkook had always been hard on himself, striving for perfection in everything he did, but seeing him let the words of strangers chip away at his confidence broke something in you. “You could never disappoint me. And the members, they understand, they know what you’re going through. As for ARMY, they would walk through hell for you. You’re not in this alone. Never.”
He stayed silent again, just breathing, as though taking in your words. You watched as the fear that had been evident in his eyes slowly started to fade, replaced by a mix of gratitude and uncertainty.
Jungkook leaned forward and pressed his forehead to yours again, his hands gently cupping yours where they rested on his face. “I’m so lucky to have you.” 
“Believe me,” you whispered back, “I’m the lucky one.”
For a few moments, the two of you stayed like that, comforted by each other’s presence, the weight of his worries slowly lifting, if only for a moment. In that quiet space, with his hand in yours and his heart open before you, everything felt a little more manageable. So manageable that for at least that moment, you forgot what you came to do here tonight. 
But Jungkook made sure to bring you back to reality not long after.
“Now let’s forget about me,” he said, his voice sounding a little bit more upbeat now. “What about you doll? Have any big news to share with me?”
You chuckled softly, tilting your head to the side for a moment, to look at him carefully. “Are you sure you're okay, tough? If you want to keep talking, we can leave this for later.”
Was it selfish of you to want to avoid the subject? Maybe.
But really, you just wanted to make sure he was going to be okay, that all these treacherous thoughts would leave his mind and never return again, even though you knew this was like an impossible mission at the time.
Jungkook sighed, rubbing his face with his tattooed hand. “I’ll be okay. Just... a lot on my mind.” He looked at you, his eyes soft but weary. “I don't want to drag you into this. But thank you for asking.”
You bit your lip, not wanting to push him further, but unable to ignore the weight in his words. 
“Baby, I always want to be dragged into whatever is happening in there,” you murmured, using your index finger to point to his head. “It's my job to try to ease your bad thoughts.”
He smiled faintly, appreciating your offer, but you could tell he wasn’t ready to dive deeper into the conversation. Instead, he shrugged and said, “We’ll figure it out later. But for now, I just want to hear how your meeting went.”
The silence stretched between you two for a moment. You gave him a small, understanding nod, your hand resting lightly on the edge of the table between you. You didn’t press any further, trusting that when he was ready, he would find the words.
“Okay, but you know where to find me,” you said quietly, your voice steady and calm, offering him the space he needed.
Jungkook looked at you then, and for a moment, the storm in his eyes seemed to settle. “I know,” he said softly, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Now tell me, please. I’m dying here.”
Looking back now, you knew that moment should’ve been the moment you told him everything. You should have used the confidence you had earlier to stop running from the truth you had kept hidden so far. 
But when your gaze met his beautiful doe eyes again, still red and puffy from crying, you also knew you couldn’t bear to do that to him. You couldn’t be the one to introduce more doubts and uncertainties into his life. Hell, there was nothing in the world you wouldn’t do to never see him cry like that ever again.
So you changed course, deciding that leaving the topic of Kim Mingyu and Japanese nights for another time was the best choice. To protect that small glimmer of peace you saw returning to him.
“They offered me a position as lead stylist for one of their major groups,” you said, trying to force the best smile you could. At the same time you were happy about the biggest opportunity of your career, your heart broke from having to hide things from Jungkook.
Jungkook’s eyes widened slightly, his lips parting in surprise before a smile broke through the lingering haze of sadness. The shift in his expression was instantaneous, his tears momentarily forgotten as excitement replaced the storm cloud in his gaze. He got up from the bed immediately taking you with him.
“Babe, that’s amazing!” he exclaimed, his voice carrying a newfound energy as he wrapped you in a hug and spun you around in the air. “I told you! You’re so talented, of course they’d want you!”
The genuine enthusiasm in his voice was enough to both warm your heart and deepen the ache of your guilt. 
You nodded, unable to stop yourself from smiling at his words, even though a knot twisted in your throat. “Thank you,” you said softly. “I’m really excited. I’ve been dreaming of something like this for years.”
After years of working with big artists and accomplishing great things in this industry, things that had never been properly rewarded or given credit, you knew you deserved something like this. It was more than just a dream come true; it was the result of all your hard work. Every late night spent hemming clothes in cramped apartments, every early morning dragging garment bags through crowded subways, every tear shed over designs rejected without a second glance—it had all led to this moment.
“You’re amazing,” Jungkook said, pulling away slightly to look at you with admiration in his eyes. “Babe, I’m so proud of you.”
You returned the smile, though it was a little strained. “Thank you, Kookie,” you said again. 
You desperately wanted to take solace in his unwavering faith in you. And perhaps, just perhaps, gather the courage to tell him everything soon. For now, though, you stayed silent, allowing his love and support to envelop you, even as the weight of your secret pressed heavily on your heart.
“Did they tell you which group it was?” he asked, pulling you to sit on his lap as he sat on the bed again. 
You nodded, trying to avoid his gaze but afraid of raising suspicion. “It's Seventeen.”
You watched as a smile spread across Jungkook's face, his entire expression lighting up with joy at your news. You had expected this reaction, his excitement was inevitable. You knew he’d be thrilled not only by the idea of you being nearby again, but also working directly with his friends.
The problem, however, was that this was the one part that made you hesitant. It wasn’t that the rest of the members were at fault for your situation; you were certain they were incredible guys. Based on everything Jungkook had shared with you and what you’d read about them, you knew they would embrace you warmly and make you feel valued in your work.
Still, you couldn’t shake the feeling of butterflies in your stomach—the bad kind. It was a sensation that went far beyond the typical nerves of starting a new job. It felt like a premonition.
“It just keeps getting better,” Jungkook spoke in an excited tone, just as you imagined he would be. “That way I can ask Mingyu to take care of you.”
Your heart clenched at Jungkook's words, even as you tried to maintain your composure. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on you, and the mention of Mingyu’s name only deepened the knot in your stomach. You forced a smile, nodding slightly as you leaned into his chest, hoping the motion would shield your conflicted expression.
“That’s sweet of you,” you said softly, trying to keep your tone light as you rested your head on his shoulder. “But I think I’ll be fine. It’s a professional environment, after all.”
Jungkook chuckled, the sound warm and reassuring as he stroked your back. “I know you will. You’re amazing at what you do. But it doesn’t hurt to have someone looking out for you, right?”
You swallowed hard. What reasons would you have to say no? “Right,” you echoed, though the word felt hollow on your tongue.
The truth you had promised yourself to share with him earlier that evening now felt impossibly distant. Jungkook's excitement and trust in you only made it harder to picture disrupting this moment with the weight of your past. Yet, even as you held on to the comfort of his embrace, a quiet voice in the back of your mind reminded you that the longer you waited, the harder it would be to face the truth.
You squeezed your eyes shut, desperately trying to drown out the voices swirling in your mind, letting yourself get lost in the warmth of your boyfriend's arms, stealing just a little more time before you faced the storm.
“This is huge for you. We need to celebrate.” 
Jungkook's enthusiasm was infectious, so you allowed yourself to be swept up in it. His smile was wide, bunny teeth on full display now, and his arms wrapped tightly around you like he never wanted to let go. Deep inside, you wished he wouldn't. 
“Celebrate?” you repeated, opening your eyes and arching a brow, unable to keep the smile off your face. “What did you have in mind, Jeon Jungkook?”
He hummed, the corners of his lips quirking up mischievously. “A fancy dinner? Or... I could cook for you. Something special. Your favorite, maybe?”
“That sounds perfect,” you said softly, your heart swelling at the thoughtfulness in his voice. You didn't want a fancy dinner or anything else. You just wanted to enjoy the rest of the night with him and Bam; to stay right here in his embrace. 
Jungkook’s eyes lit up at your response, and his lips curved into the kind of grin that made your chest warm in the best way. “Then it’s settled,” he declared, leaning back slightly to look at you more closely. “Let’s open a bottle of wine too. You deserve it. This is your moment, babe.”
“Alright,” you said, your smile soft but genuine. “I want to help.”
Jungkook groaned dramatically, shaking his head. “No way. You’re the guest of honor tonight. Your job is to sit back, relax, and enjoy.”
“Guest of honor?” you teased, tilting your head. “I live here half the time.”
“Exactly,” he said, leaning closer until your foreheads nearly touched. “Half the time. Which means tonight, you get to be spoiled.”
You laughed, unable to stop yourself from leaning into him. “Fine,” you conceded. “But I’ll set the table.”
“Deal,” he murmured, his voice dropping to a soft, affectionate tone. For a moment, the weight of your secret felt just a little lighter, his unwavering love wrapping around you like a shield against the storm you knew was coming soon.
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If you were being honest, you had expected the night to end like this. Not with warmth and laughter, but with words sharp enough to leave invisible cuts. You hadn't anticipated, however, that it would be for entirely different reasons from those you thought. Or maybe, deep down, you had known. You should’ve known, at least, that this subject had probably been taking up residence in his mind throughout the day.
It had started so innocently. You had an amazing dinner with Jungkook, sharing Japchae and a bottle of wine. You’d explained your work with Seventeen, detailing the complexities of managing their schedules, moods, and preferences, all while ensuring their cohesive look as a group. He’d listened attentively, supportive as always, even suggesting he could travel with you when his own schedule allowed.
“Wouldn’t it be cool if I could join you and Mingyu for part of the tour?” he had said, his excitement genuine.
The night seemed perfect and as it came to a close, you insisted on helping him at least put the dishes back in the cupboard. But Jungkook refused, gently telling you to go get ready for bed while he took care of all the cleaning himself. Feeling the drowsiness from the wine setting in, you didn’t put up much of a fight and headed off to unwind.
You were calmly brushing your teeth when Jungkook entered the bathroom, quietly sitting on the toilet lid, after putting Bam in his room to sleep. Through the mirror, you saw his eyes heavy with sleep and the lingering effects of the wine on his face. 
“You didn’t have your phone with you today?” he asked after a moment, tilting his head to the side as he looked at you through half-closed eyes.
You paused mid-brush, the question catching you off guard. “I did,” you replied after a pause, spitting out the toothpaste. “But it ran out of battery at some point during the day, and I didn’t see it until I got here.”
Jungkook didn’t respond immediately. He simply watched you, his expression unreadable. “Where did you go after the meeting?”
You frowned, sensing something off in his tone. You hadn’t expected him to ask about your day in such detail, especially considering how understanding he’d been about your busy schedule. You could tell there was something in his tone that made it feel less like casual curiosity and more like... concern, maybe even unease.
You quickly finished brushing your teeth and rinsed your mouth, turning to face him, your hand still holding the toothbrush in a vague gesture of distraction.
“I went for a meal with Dahee,” you said slowly, testing the waters. “We haven’t seen each other in ages, and it was nice to catch up.”
His jaw tightened slightly and Jungkook sat there, watching you with a contemplative expression, his gaze flicking to the toothbrush you were setting down on the counter. “And how did you arrange that?”
“Through my phone…” You trailed off, suddenly feeling defensive.
“Right,” he muttered, nodding almost imperceptibly. “So your phone died, but you managed to message Dahee before that?” His voice was calm, but the underlying tension was unmistakable.
You paused, trying to gauge his mood. Jungkook was always the type to give you space if you needed and he had never been insecure about your relationship, nor had he shown any distrust towards you at any time during the past six months. But there was an intensity in his eyes now that made you wonder if something was bothering him, if he would have talked to someone who was possibly much braver than you when it came to telling the truth to his face.
“Jungkook,” you said, turning to face him fully after drying your hands on the towel and placing your toothbrush beside his. “What’s going on? Are you upset I went out with my best friend?”
“No,” he said quickly, shaking his head. “It’s not that. I just…” He exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “You couldn’t text or call me back? Not even once?”
His words hung in the air like a challenge, and suddenly the warmth of the evening felt suffocating. “I’ve been busy,” you said, crossing your arms defensively. “I told you today would be packed.”
“And you couldn’t spare five seconds to let me know you were okay?” His voice was rising now, the hurt unmistakable.
You blinked, his words landing heavier than you expected. Jungkook’s tone wasn’t angry, but it was raw, tinged with something that felt like hurt. His wide eyes searched for yours, the vulnerability in them throwing you off balance.
“I—” you started, only to falter. Maybe you deserved it after ignoring his multiple missed calls. “Kook, my phone was dead. I didn’t even think about it because it was such a last-minute thing with Dahee. I wasn’t trying to ignore you.”
He leaned forward slightly, elbows resting on his knees as he buried his face in his hands for a moment. When he looked back up, his expression was softer, but the tension in his shoulders remained. “I know you weren’t ignoring me. It's just... when you didn’t have your phone with you, and I couldn’t reach you... I started to wonder if you were avoiding me after this morning.”
And there it was. 
“Jungkook…”
“I don't want to scare you off with the idea of moving in; I just thought that—”
He broke off, running a hand through his hair. The vulnerability etched across his face made your heart ache. You knew, from the moment you had walked out of the kitchen this morning, stating you needed to think about it, that this matter would linger unresolved in his mind. You had felt it would create a tension that would only grow if you didn’t address it according to his timing. 
“You just thought what?” you prompted gently, your voice soft but insistent.
“That it might bring us closer,” he finally said, looking up at you. “That would show you how serious I am about us. About you.”
The warmth of his words seeped into your chest, the tenderness behind them making your heart flutter. But just as quickly, doubt crept in.
You swallowed hard, your thoughts swirling. You told yourself Jungkook wasn’t trying to guilt-trip you about this—at least, that’s what you kept repeating, hating yourself for even entertaining the idea. Still, the unease lingered inside, as if your freedom to think it over was somehow a source of discomfort for him.
You couldn’t help but study his face, your eyes scanning every feature, searching for even the slightest hint of uncertainty about this. There was none—his expression was steady, resolute. Unlike your own mind, which was spiraling, racing through every possible reason for your hesitation.
“I meant it,” he stated, eyes searching for something in yours. “I don’t want you to be anywhere else but here with me. I love having you around. And honestly, it feels like the right time."
You took a deep breath, your chest rising and falling heavily, before opening the door and stepping out of the bathroom. Entering the bedroom felt like seeking refuge, as if the space could somehow ease the tightness in your chest and help you breathe better. His words echoed in your mind, their gravity sinking in as you started pacing around his bedroom, your movements restless.
Your thoughts raced wildly—this wasn’t just a step; it was a leap, one that would change everything. The idea was both thrilling and utterly terrifying.
And you wanted it. Didn’t you?
Jungkook was everything you’d ever dreamed of—kind, stable, and endlessly patient with every quirk and flaw you carried. You loved him, deeply and fiercely. Yet, the thought of merging your lives so intimately made your heart race for reasons that weren’t entirely joyful.
The events of the past week and this afternoon loomed in your mind, a dark shadow cast over the light you’d found with him, lingering just enough to make you question if now was the right time.
Jungkook came out of the bathroom and was now standing near the closet door, watching you silently as you paced around, his dark eyes tracking your every move with a mix of curiosity and patience. He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his expression unreadable but more calm than before. He wasn’t rushing you, wasn’t pushing for an answer—just waiting, giving you the space to process what he’d said.
“I… I don’t know,” you began, biting your lip. “It’s a big step, don’t you think?”
He nodded, his lips curving into a small, reassuring smile. “I know,” he replied gently. “It’s a huge step, but I’m ready for it, and I want to take it with you.”
You took another deep breath, running your fingers through your hair and feeling the walls closing in around you. Jungkook’s expression faltered, confusion flashing across his features as he watched you.  
“What’s wrong? Don’t you want to?”
“It’s not that I don’t want to,” you said finally, your words carefully chosen. “I just… I feel like maybe it’s too soon?”
He studied you with a frown. “Too soon? Y/N, it’s been six months. I love you. I want to build a life with you.”
“I know,” you whispered, your voice cracking slightly. “And I love you too. But…” you trailed off, unable to put into words your emotions. 
“But what?”
Oh, I don't know, I'm kind of keeping a secret from you that I slept with your best friend four years ago and we pretended we didn't know each other to your face, and I don't know how to deal with that. Do you still want me to move in?
The absurdity of saying it aloud hit you like a cold wave, and your breath caught in your throat. It wasn't just the words themselves, it was the potential devastation they carried, the way they could shatter everything you and Jungkook had carefully built together so far. Not that this situation was making things much better, you thought.
You shook your head as if trying to physically dislodge the thought. This wasn’t the time, not now. Maybe not ever. But the weight of the unspoken truth lingered above your head, pressing down on you even as you stood frozen in the middle of the bedroom.
This wasn’t about doubting your feelings for him. You loved Jungkook more than words could express. He had shown you time and again that he was there for you, steady and unwavering, no matter what. But taking this step—making this commitment—wasn’t just about love. It was about letting go of the fears that whispered what-ifs in the quiet corners of your mind.
And mostly, letting go of the past. What you weren't sure you were ready to do anymore.
You had been so sure of yourself just hours ago. Why doubt clawed at your chest now?
Finally, you stopped pacing and turned to face him, your arms wrapped tightly around yourself as if for comfort. You shook your head, unable to meet his gaze. “But what about everything else? My work, your schedule? It’s a lot to juggle.”
He shrugged, a small smile tugging at his lips. “We’ll figure it out. I just want to be with you, come home to you. I think it could be amazing. Just think about it, babe, no more running back and forth, no more late-night drives. It’s closer to work, and you’d waste less time in traffic.”
“What about my apartment?” you asked, but deep down it was clear you were just looking for reasons to stand your ground.
His response was immediate, as if he’d already thought of it. “You can turn it into your studio. I can help you with that.”
“You’ve thought of all this.” It wasn’t a question, though it sounded like one.
“I have,” he admitted, his tone soft but certain. “I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”
What the hell was wrong with you? Why didn’t you want to live with this perfect man standing in front of you, offering everything you’d ever wanted?
You chewed your lip again, hesitating before you spoke again. “I just think we should wait a little longer.”
Jungkook sighed, and the playful lightness from earlier vanished. “Y/N, if this is about me leaning on you too much, then say so. I don’t want you to feel pressured.”
“No, it’s not that,” you replied quickly, though doubts began to creep in.
“Then what is it?” he asked, his tone tinged with hurt.
You opened your mouth to explain but faltered. How could you share that the memory of Mingyu’s piercing gaze and your unresolved history loomed in your mind? That, despite your love for Jungkook, moving in together felt like a complicated risk right now?
“It’s not that I don’t want to. I do. It’s just…” You sighed, shaking your head, frustration bubbling to the surface. “You’re acting like I should drop everything and just say yes!”
His expression darkened, confusion morphing into irritation. “I thought we were building a future together, and now it feels like you’re pulling away!”
“It’s too soon!” you shouted back, the admission tumbling out before you could stop it.
Jungkook blinked, his expression a mix of hurt and disbelief. “Too soon? Y/N, we’ve been together for six months. I love you. I want to build a life with you. How is that too soon?”
“I don’t know!” you cried, running a hand through your hair again. “I just… I need more time, okay?”
“More time for what?” His voice cracked, the vulnerability in his eyes making your stomach churn. “To figure out if you even want this? If you even want me?”
“Don’t do that,” you said sharply, your hands trembling. “Don’t twist this into me not loving you, because you know that’s not true.”
“Then what is it?” he demanded, stepping closer. “Because right now, it feels like you’re running away.”
“I’m not running away!” you yelled, your voice echoing in the bedroom. “I’m just… I’m trying to figure things out. My work, your schedule—there’s so much to juggle.”
“I told you: we can figure it out together,” he said, his tone softening for a moment. “But I can’t keep doing this, Y/N. I need to know you’re all in.”
Your throat tightened, tears stinging your eyes. “I am all in,” you whispered, though now even you weren’t sure if it was entirely true.
“Then prove it,” he said, his voice low but steady. “Because right now, it doesn’t feel like you are.”
The silence that followed was deafening, the weight of his words crushing you. You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came. How could you explain the doubts that clawed at you? How could you explain to him that you were scared to death that your past would come back to destroy what you had built together without telling him who your past was?
Silence lingered between you, heavy and suffocating. Your shoulders slumped as you sat on the edge of the bed trying to control your legs that you hadn't realized were shaking. “I’m too tired for this right now, Jungkook. Can we please talk tomorrow?”
He stood there for a moment, staring at you with a mixture of hurt and anger before shaking his head. “Fine.”
Jungkook grabbed a spare blanket from the closet and headed for the couch, the soft sound of his footsteps retreating down the hall. You stood there, your reflection staring back at you in the mirror wall, tears streaming down your face for the first time this week.
The night had ended exactly as you’d expected. Just not for the reasons you’d hoped.
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You’d officially step into your new role as Seventeen’s lead stylist three days later, after submitting your resignation letter to Elle Magazine. The transition from one job to the other had been anything but smooth, even though HYBE had done their part to ease the process. You were grateful for their professionalism and for agreeing to handle any complications with your former employer, even providing a temporary replacement until a permanent hire could fill your position, showing how much they wanted you to work with them.
They wanted you to start immediately, which meant you’d already spent the last three days coordinating the group’s wardrobe remotely, finalizing adjustments, sending approvals through a dizzying chain of emails, and constantly contacting their former stylist, named Mitsuri Miyawaki, known as Stormi. 
Three whole days of nonstop emails, virtual meetings, and late-night alterations that had blurred together, confined to your apartment-turned-studio, sewing and sketching, and though you were now more excited about the chance to leave an even greater mark in the fashion and entertainment industry, your whole body bears witness to your tiredness.
All of this, however, meant that you hadn’t spoken or seen Jungkook in three whole days. The next morning, when you woke up, he had already left for work, and you couldn’t wait for him to come back, since doing so would’ve made you late. The only messages exchanged between the two of you over the past three days had been about Bam, aside from the one you sent this morning: a simple "Fighting ❤️," knowing today would be the release of Left and Right.
You wished things were different right now, but there wasn’t much you could do to improve the situation, especially since your answer to what he wanted so desperately remained unchanged.
As always, for the past three days you have been using your coping mechanism: focusing on work to forget your problems. 
And Stormi had been a lifeline in your chaos. To your surprise, she was now TXT’s new stylist and, apparently, also Vernon’s girlfriend. That particular tidbit had been casually dropped into one of your conversations catching you off guard, but making you have an immense empathy for her immediately, since you were practically in the same boat. 
She was extremely kind and attentive to your questions, and within just a few days, the two of you had already spoken more than you had with anyone else this week, constantly staying in touch through countless messages, video and phone calls. Her guidance was invaluable, but it was clear she was more than ready to hand over the reins. 
For your first day, she had offered to show you around the building and take you to the cafeteria for an iced americano, mentioning it was one of the largest and most varied she had ever seen, which, of course, you couldn’t deny. 
“Have you met Choi Arin sunbaenim, yet? The supervisor?” Mitsuri asked you, when you two entered the cafeteria. 
You shook your head, scanning the spacious cafeteria with curiosity as you joined the line to place your orders. You immediately recognized some familiar artists scattered at tables, chatting and eating animatedly, along with various members of the staff team.
“Not yet,” you admitted, glancing at Mitsuri as you queued up to place your orders. “We've only communicated through email. She mentioned she'd stop by my studio before introducing me to the members.”
One of the things you had discovered was that here, the team of stylists of each group had their own separate space to work, even though the general HYBE wardrobe room was available to anyone who needed it. And since you were in charge of guiding Seventeen’s stylist team, you also had a private studio for yourself, which you had appreciated very much.
“She's a cow,” Mitsuri said, without beating around the bush. “She’s been on my case since day one. Honestly, it’s a miracle I wasn’t fired when she found out about my relationship with Hansol.”
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “She’s the one who discovered it?”
“Unfortunately.” Mitsuri rolled her eyes dramatically. 
“I'm guessing she didn't approve?” You let out a genuine chuckle at the expression on her face.
“That’s putting it lightly,” Mitsuri snorted, grabbing a tray for her order. “She’s a stickler for rules, and she doesn’t care much for personal connections interfering with work. Can’t say I blame her entirely, things can get messy if you’re not careful, but still, it’s exhausting.”
“She must’ve been intense,” you said, cringing at the thought of a stern supervisor breathing down your neck.
“Oh, absolutely,” Mitsuri said, chuckling softly. “To be fair, HYBE has some pretty strict policies about that sort of thing. But you know how it is—long hours, close quarters. Things happen.” She shrugged. “That's why I was relocated.”
The mention of personal connections and professionalism hit a little too close to home, given the delicate balance you were already trying to maintain between your personal and professional life. The last thing you needed was for someone like Arin to scrutinize your every move.
Mitsuri seemed to sense your unease, her expression softening. 
“Don’t let her intimidate you, though,” she continued, her tone lightening as you moved down the line. “You’re ridiculously talented. They wouldn’t have hired you if they didn’t think you could handle it.”
Her words brought a small smile to your lips. “Thanks, Stormi. That means a lot.”
She shrugged with a grin. “Just speaking the truth. Besides, you’re gonna kill it here. I’ve seen your work and it’s amazing. The guys are lucky to have you.”
The line moved forward, and you placed your order, grateful for the brief reprieve from the whirlwind of thoughts swirling in your mind as always. While Mitsuri grabbed a piece of iced lemon loaf cake to enjoy right away, you decided your stomach couldn’t handle much more than an espresso to keep you awake. Still, you couldn’t resist grabbing a chocolate chip cookie for later because it looked too good to pass up.
“Okay, but enough about Arin,” Mitsuri said, offering you a reassuring smile. “You’re going to love working with Seventeen. They’re a handful, sure, but they’re good guys. They make all the stress worth it. And if you ever need a break or a rant session, just call me. I’ll sneak you out for coffee, or a drink if it’s really bad.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, her easy going demeanor putting you at ease despite the lingering nerves. “I might take you up on that.”
As the barista handed over your orders, Mitsuri raised an eyebrow, her smile never fading. “You already know some of them, right?”
The two of you weaved through the maze of tables, heading toward one near the floor-to-ceiling windows. The sunlight streamed in, highlighting the bustling cafeteria as you settled into your seats, the view of the city below serving as a stunning backdrop.
“Yeah,” you said, nodding as you took a sip of your coffee. “Seokmin, Minghao and... Mingyu. They are friends with Jungkook. I don’t know them much more than that.”
You knew that starting a friendship by lying wasn’t the best approach. But what could you do? She was still a stranger—albeit a dear one, but a stranger nonetheless. It wasn’t like you could just spill personal details about your life, especially when it came to your past. The NDA was still in effect, after all.
After your answer, Mitsuri proceeded to give you a complete dossier on each of the members, describing them with an excited smile and evident affection. It was clear that she had loved working with them, and it probably hadn’t been easy to be reassigned to another group. Still, she seemed to like TXT just as much, mentioning that they were great, though less chaotic than Seventeen.
Despite the nervousness, you found yourself laughing, already imagining what kind of dynamic they must have within the group. It sounded like Seventeen was a vibrant mix of personalities, each one offering something unique to the group, and you’d soon be a part of that energy.
“Jeonghan looks like an angel, he’s even nicknamed Angel, but trust me, there’s nothing angelic about him. Not in a bad way, though,” Mitsuri added with a grin. “I say this with great affection. His language of love is disturbance. He’s a great listener also.”
“Disturbance as a love language, huh?” you chuckled, taking another sip of your coffee. “Sounds... intriguing.”
“Oh, it is,” Mitsuri replied, her grin widening. “But you'll love him. Jeonghan has this way of making everyone feel at ease, like he’s scheming something, but in a way that makes you curious rather than nervous. He’s got that kind of charm.”
You couldn’t help but smile, her enthusiasm contagious. It was clear she held a deep affection for the group, which eased some of your anxieties about stepping into your new role. If they were anything like Mitsuri described, you had a feeling this job, though challenging, might also be a lot of fun.
As the conversation continued, Mitsuri moved on to talk about Joshua, the group's resident gentleman, and his impeccable manners that somehow made his occasional mischievous moments more surprising. Then there was Seungkwan, who, according to Mitsuri, was a whirlwind of energy and emotion, a living embodiment of both comedy and heartfelt sincerity.
“Don’t even get me started on him,” Mitsuri said, shaking her head fondly. “Seungkwan’s like a serotonin boost in human form. But be prepared, he’ll probably want your opinion on everything, from wardrobe choices to which snacks should be stocked in this bedroom.”
You laughed. “I’ll keep that in mind. He sounds like he’d be hard to say no to.”
“Oh, he is,” she confirmed with a mock-serious nod. “And then there’s Mingyu…” Mitsuri’s tone shifted slightly, a hint of something playful but cautious creeping into her voice. “You’ve already met him, right?”
“Briefly,’ you said, keeping your tone neutral. “We were introduced through Jungkook a while back.”
Mitsuri hummed thoughtfully. “Well, Mingyu is... Mingyu,” she said finally, her words laced with amusement. “He’s an absolute sweetheart. Tall, a bit clumsy, but honestly one of the kindest people you’ll ever meet. Not to mention, he’s ridiculously good-looking.” She smirked. “He’s got this... aura about him. Basically the human equivalent of a golden retriever. But don’t let that fool you. He’s a flirt, and he knows it.”
A shiver ran down your spine. Oh, you knew it too.
You wanted to smile at the fact that, despite everything, Mingyu was still the same, but you held yourself back. Every detail Mitsuri described knocked on the door to the basement of your heart, bringing back a faint sense of familiarity you hadn’t realized was still lingering there. It felt like looking at a photo of someone you used to know. 
You just nodded, filing away the information. 
“He’s a perfectionist, though, so don’t be surprised if he’s the one asking for adjustments on his outfits the most.”
You let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Trust me,” Mitsuri said, leaning back in her chair. “You’re about to experience the Mingyu Effect firsthand. And once you do, there’s no going back.”
You knew she was right. You had lived through it, you were more than familiar with it.
Mitsuri had moved on to the next member, and you were lifting your coffee to your lips, laughing at her description of Hoshi, when your attention shifted to the counter. You analyzed a group of four guys who had just entered the cafeteria, causing several heads to turn in their direction.
They all had their backs turned to you and Mitsuri. The first one had black hair, and despite his small stature, his physique was strong and well-proportioned. The second one wasn’t much taller, with a lean, toned physique and brownish hair. The guy who came right after him had light brown hair as well, but his muscular, athletic build—with broad shoulders and strong arms—made him clearly the second tallest of the group.
The last one of the group was much taller than the rest, with a long, muscular torso that clearly drew attention wherever he went, including from the group of girls sitting just a few inches away from him. His black hair was a little messy, falling over his ears and you could see the muscles on his back through the fabric of the white shirt he was wearing.
From that angle, he looked like thousands of other ordinary men in Seoul, but you knew exactly who he was.
It was as if he had been summoned.
Unable to look away, you were paralyzed, waiting for the moment when he would turn around and spot you, right in his line of sight, after nearly two weeks since you told him you would think about it and had remained completely radio silent. 
“Y/N?" Mitsuri calls out to you, following the direction of your gaze. You hold your breath for a moment, relieved when a group of staff members stepped into her line of sight. "Is everything okay?”
You blink, stunned. This couldn't be happening. “Uh... Yeah. I... I just…” You trail off, searching for the right words, but your mind feels foggy as you try to focus on anything else but the man standing across the room.
You looked back at the counter and saw his eyes locked on you, his face completely incredulous, as if he was feeling the same way you were about him: like the sight of you there was some sort of figment of his imagination. He blinked a few times and you swallowed hard.
The moment you saw his feet moving, instinct takes over your body, and a surge of self-preservation propels you out of your chair.
“I'm sorry, Storm,” you said, glancing at her. “I have to go.”
She looks puzzled by your sudden behavior but simply says, “Oh, it's okay.”
“I just remembered I need to make some adjustments, and…” Your eyes dart up, catching sight of him coming closer. “Yeah. I'll see you tomorrow. Thanks for everything.”
You grab your bag, sling it over your shoulder, and rushes between the tables, darting out of the cafeteria at a speed you didn’t know was humanly possible. Without daring to look back, you hurry toward the elevator's hallway, your heart racing, unsure if he’s following you or not.
The elevator doors seem to take an eternity to open as you anxiously tap all them, stealing quick glances over your shoulder. Each second feels like a lifetime, your heart pounding in your ears, drowning out the hum of the bustling building.
You silently beg for the elevator to arrive, gripping the strap of your bag so tightly your knuckles ache. Just as the sign shows it’s on the 9th floor, you catch sight of him stepping into the hallway, his tall figure unmistakable even from a distance.
“Y/N.”
The sound of his voice calling out your name freezes you in place, sending another chill down your spine again. You feel the weight of his gaze even before you turn to meet it, and you swallow hard again, hand hovering over the elevator button as you consider your options. Run, face him, pretend you didn’t hear him—none of them feel like the right answer.
You glance over your shoulder, trying to appear composed, though every nerve in your body is screaming to run. Mingyu is just a few feet away now, his expression a mix of disbelief and something you can’t quite place. Relief? Confusion? Frustration? Maybe all three.
“Y/N,” he calls once more, and this time, you can hear the unmistakable urgency in his voice. The gentle way he says your name tugs at something inside you, making it even harder to stand your ground. 
The elevator dings, its doors sliding open, offering an escape route. You hesitate, torn between stepping inside and hearing what he has to say. Suddenly, your feet seem to have forgotten their purpose right at the moment that you wanted to shield yourself from the storm brewing between you and the man standing behind you. 
“Y/N. Seriously?” he says softly, his tone carrying a thousand unspoken meanings.
You exhale sharply, your resolve crumbling at the vulnerability in his tone. Slowly, you turn to face him, your bag still clutched tightly against your side. His dark eyes lock onto yours, searching for something, though you’re not sure what.
“Please,” he says, his voice quieter now, almost pleading. “Just give me a minute.”
“Hi," you finally manage to say. You’re trying to figure out what to say, but your head is filled with a jumble of meaningless words. Hi? Really? Who, in their right mind, says something as dumb as 'Hi' at a time like this?
"Are you...?" he begins, his voice breathless. "Why are you avoiding me?"
You blink, caught off guard by his question. For a moment, you're paralyzed, unable to respond. It feels as though time slows, the noise of the building fading into the background as his voice echoes in your mind. 
It wasn’t exactly your intention to avoid him, but lately, it seemed like that was your only response to everything being thrown your way.
You open your mouth, but the words don’t come out right away. “I’m not... I wasn’t…” You trail off, unsure of how to even begin explaining. “I didn't mean to,” you finally say, your voice barely above a whisper. You take a step back, trying to create some space between you two, but his gaze doesn’t waver.
“You didn’t mean to what?” His voice is softer now, tinged with something that sounds like frustration, but also concern.
You glance down, feeling the weight of everything you’ve been trying to avoid coming back to you all at once. You want to tell him everything—the reasons you’ve kept your distance, the mess of emotions tangled up in your heart—but it’s too much to say all at once. It’s too raw, too complicated. You need to be mentally and emotionally prepared for a conversation like this.
He stared at you for a beat longer, his brows furrowing as if he were trying to read you. It felt like he was slowly beginning to grasp the weight of the situation, the realization dawning on him bit by bit. “It’s been a long time.”
“Yeah,” you replied, your throat tight. The tension between you felt palpable, like you were both standing on the edge of something you weren’t ready to face yet. “It has.”
His voice was laced with something that sounded almost… regretful as he said, “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again after...”
You blinked, taken aback by the rawness in his tone. “Yeah. Neither did I.”
But your confusion only deepened with every word he said. He was the one who left. He was the one who disappeared without a trace after that last day. He was the one who had shoved that NDA down your throat. And yet, here he was, looking at you like he hadn’t wanted that.
You couldn’t make sense of it.
The air between you felt thick, suffocating you in this huge hallway. You looked away, trying to steady your breath, trying to keep control. But his presence was overwhelming, stirring things inside you that you didn't even know how to explain without seeming like you were still madly in love with him.
Because you weren't.
You were hopelessly in love with Jungkook and only him.
“Mingyu,” you said, struggling to swallow the lump in your throat as you speak his name out loud for the first time. “I’m sorry, but I have to go. I have a meeting in fifteen minutes.”
He leaned down, his face leveling with yours.
“Are you kidding me?” His eyes were wild, full of disbelief. He took a step forward while you took one back, your back hitting the metal of the elevator doors. “You think I’m just going to bump into you again, say ‘Hey, Y/N, what’s up?’ and let you walk away again? Just like that? No more words, no more talking for another four fucking years? Have you even thought about talking at all?”
Your breath catches at his words, and for a moment, everything feels like it’s collapsing in on you. You wanted to make sense of what he meant by emphasizing the word again. But at the same time, you were afraid that knowing might make things inside you worse. His intensity, the raw emotion in his voice, it’s all so much harder to face than you ever expected. 
“I'm not ready for this conversation yet,” you admit quietly, looking away from him to stare at your own shoes.
“You need to be ready to talk to me?”
“If there’s anyone I need to be ready for, it’s you,” you admitted, your voice almost low enough that he wouldn't hear. But he did. You saw it in the way his entire face seemed to contort in pain, exactly like the pain twisting in your own chest.
“I just need…” he begins, searching for your gaze. “How are you? How long have you been back?”
“I’m fine,” you answered mechanically. “I got back in August.”
For the last four years, you've been angry, convincing yourself you were above it all, but just one single look at his face was enough to make you understand that you weren't. 
Quite the opposite, actually. 
Somehow, you're holding it together, barely managing to keep your composure, but you knew that if you stayed even a second longer, you wouldn't be able to keep it up. The way Mingyu's face seems to mirror the confusion that's going on in your head, combined with only two hours of sleep and no clue when this day would end, is too much for you to handle right now. You need to get out before everything unravels.
“I have to go,” you say, your voice suddenly desperate. “Okay?”
Before he could respond, you turned and walked away, heading straight for the first elevator with its doors wide open. You’re aware he could’ve caught up to you in a few quick steps, his long legs easily closing the distance, but he doesn’t. And as the elevator jolts downward to the 15th floor, you couldn’t shake the feeling that he's still there, just behind you.
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When Choi Arin finally arrived at your studio, around three in the afternoon, your nerves had completely calmed, though a throbbing pain in your head prevented you from thinking clearly enough to continue sewing the gold studs onto the leather of the black jacket that would soon belong to Wonwoo.
To your surprise, she didn’t say much, simply asking you to follow her—and so you did. Now, the two of you were trapped in the elevator, traveling from the 15th floor to the 6th in almost complete silence, the only sound being the soft hum of the metal.
You glanced at her from the corner of your eye, but she remained unchanged: her gaze was focused on the metal doors, her posture erect, hands clasped behind her back.
Her demeanor almost made her seem like a strict high school principal, but she was much younger than you had anticipated. If it weren’t for the badge hanging from her neck, clearly marking her position within the company, you might have easily mistaken her for one of the company’s female artists, especially considering her striking beauty.
“How has your first day been so far?” she finally asked, turning her body slightly to look at you. Her eyes are piercingly intimidating, yet her voice remained calm and gentle, echoing through the elevator.
You felt the weight of her gaze, the intensity of her presence making it hard to keep your composure. It's as if she’s already assessing you, measuring you in ways you aren't prepared for. You straighten your posture, trying to mask the nerves bubbling up inside of you.
“It’s been... busy,”  you replied, trying to keep your tone light, though her intense gaze still made you feel on edge all over again. “I’ve been mostly settling in and getting familiar with the team. There’s a lot to process, but it’s all exciting.”
Arin nodded thoughtfully, her expression unreadable as she listened. “I’m glad to hear that. Transitioning into a new role, especially one like this, is never easy.” Her gaze briefly flicked down to your sketchbook, which you clutched in your hands. “I’ve heard you worked with Bangtan Sonyeondan before.”
You nodded, feeling a hint of pride. “Yeah, I worked with them for a while.”
At that moment, you assumed she would start a conversation about your past work experience, as most people in this field flipped out with excitement when they learned you were responsible for securing Dua Lipa a million-dollar contract with Versace or how you had styled BTS for the VOGUE X GQ Korea 2022 January issue and the Grammy’s. 
But you couldn't be more wrong. 
The way she clicked her tongue and pressed the button to stop the elevator on the eighth floor made her intentions very clear, exactly as Stormi had predicted: she wanted to intimidate you.
“This isn’t like the last time you worked here, so I would like to clear a few things up.”
Arin’s voice remained calm, but there was an edge to it now, one that made the air between you feel thick. She stood straight, her posture unwavering, as if she were delivering a warning she expected you to understand without questioning.
“First of all,” she began. “I don’t like you and that’s not going to change. If it was it for me, you wouldn't have been hired. I know your history and I don't approve of it. I’m the supervisor here, which means you answer to me. I don’t care that you have experience in this field or that your boyfriend is famous. I’m the one in charge here.”
The weight of Arin’s words hitted you like a physical blow, each one cutting deeper than the last, the abrupt shift in tone catching you off guard. You tried to keep your face neutral, but it was hard when everything inside you screamed to respond. You had worked for years to earn your place in this industry, to get to a position where you could walk into any room with confidence. But here, in front of Arin, that confidence felt like it was slowly slipping away.
“I don’t care how many people you’ve worked with, how many magazines you’ve graced, or how many contracts you’ve secured. None of that matters here. This is a different ball game, and the rules are mine. You follow them, or you’re out.”
You could feel your pulse quicken, and for a moment, you wondered if you should just walk away. But you knew that would be foolish. No matter how much Arin seemed to want to break you down, you weren’t the kind of person to let someone like her get the best of you.
“I understand,” you replied, keeping your voice steady.
"I expect you to follow protocol exactly as it's laid out, no exceptions," she said, leaning forward slightly. "And whatever personal connections you might have? Leave them at the door. This is a professional environment, and I won’t tolerate anything less than that."
You took a steadying breath, forcing yourself to remain composed. "Understood," you said evenly, meeting her eyes.
Her lips curled into a tight smile, but it wasn’t warm. “I want you to know that there will be no fraternizing with any of the group members. If you do, you’ll be fired. Do you understand?”
The intensity of her statement lingered in the air, her piercing gaze challenging you to flinch. But you didn’t. You square your shoulders and met her eyes, willing your voice to stay firm. “Crystal clear,” you replied.
“This is a very different environment,” she continued, her eyes locking with yours, as if daring you to challenge her. “Here, we don’t do things the way you might be used to. There’s no room for mistakes, no room for error. We work fast, we work hard, and we work with a level of professionalism that you might not have encountered before. I trust you understand that.”
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes, her subtle jab not lost on you. Instead, you forced a polite nod, your expression calm despite the fire building in your chest. “Yes. And I respect your position. I’m here to do my job, and I intend to do it well.”
“We’ll see about that. I have my doubts. I hope you prove me wrong.”
You nodded again, not trusting yourself to speak. The pressure in the air felt suffocating, but you could tell that Arin wasn’t finished yet.
“You’ll be working under my direct supervision,” she continued, her tone sharper now. “And if I catch even the slightest hint that you're not living up to the standard I expect, you’ll be gone before you even realize what happened. Got it?”
You didn't even know if she had the power to do it, but it was clear that there was no room for negotiation. It was clear that Arin wasn’t interested in a discussion, only in making sure you knew exactly where you stood in this power dynamic.
“Got it,” you said again, your words tight but firm.
“I’m in charge here,” she adds again. “Anything I need goes through me.”
“Sounds good.”
“I don’t know how your last experience here worked, and I don’t care. Anything goes down with you and someone in the group, you’re fired. Remember one thing: I have eyes everywhere.”
The repetition of her words didn’t escape you, but you didn’t feel the need to comment on it. Arin was clearly intent on asserting dominance and testing how far she could push you. It was as if she needed to keep reminding you of the same boundaries, like she was trying to convince herself more than anything else.
You noticed the way her eyes kept scanning you, searching for cracks in your composure. It was strange—almost obsessive, as if she feared that a single slip-up would unravel everything. You could feel her frustration simmering just beneath the surface, her control slipping in these subtle ways that only someone used to being in power would notice. You almost wondered what it was about you that made her so intent on stamping out any hint of rebellion.
“Understood,” you repeated, careful to keep your tone neutral. Your mind was already spinning with the implications of her words.
You had worked in this industry for a long time, and Arin’s rules seemed arbitrary, almost paranoid. She couldn’t control everything, and if she didn’t relax, her insecurity would show.
You still had a job to do, and you weren’t about to let anyone make you doubt your place. “I’m here to work,” you said, trying to keep the slight edge from your voice. “And I’ll follow the protocol, exactly as you laid it out. No issues.”
Arin paused for a moment, studying you intently, as if she were searching for any hint of insincerity. But when her gaze softened, even just a fraction, you knew that she was registering your compliance. It wasn’t the warmth of trust, just the relief of a brief moment of silence where she wasn’t feeling threatened.
“Good,” she said at last, her voice slightly less sharp, though still guarded. “I expect no less.”
She pressed the button and the elevator started moving again with a jolt that almost made you lose your balance.
When you exited the elevator, you walked behind her until you reached one of the rooms, marked with a sign that reads: SEVENTEEN - Do Not Disturb - Rehearsal. 
“Welcome to the team,” Arin said over her shoulder, her tone colder than the temperature of the hallway. It wasn’t a greeting—it was more of a command. And then she opened the door to the practice room.
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ppongie ¡ 6 months ago
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K.MINGYU — Leavin’
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“If that’s how you feel then it won’t happen again. Just get over it okay?” The last part wasn’t so necessary to say but.. at least it was all over.
He was ready to leave you alone in the kitchen, so when he took a few steps, you reached your hand out to hold his wrist. “Don’t.”
He was confused, shocked to say the least, by the hand on his wrist. “What?” He sighed out. Your lips parted wanting to say something but it seemed like your tongue was tied in knots.
He raised an eyebrow at you after waiting for less than five seconds “You got more to say?” He knew. Because your dilated pupils were shaking. “We never argue like this..” you dropped your hand from his wrist.
For some reason he missed your touch there, still feeling your hands wrapped around his wrist, like the feeling when someone’s done pinching your skin. It burned.
��We always make sure we’re okay in the end-“ “And we are-“ he cut you off to continue but you shake your head “No, we’re not.”
It was already hard for him to deal with his emotions but this conversation with you was harder to get out of. “I was going to leave you, gyu…” you remind him.
The sight of you grabbing your bags and throwing your clothes in. “I don’t know how you got this stubborn.” Did it take two years to put out the spark you two once had? Never knew there was a time limit to your love.
“I’m not stubborn,” now he’s being defensive. “It’s just..” he paused and by the look in your eyes, you wanted to know what he was going to say next.
Instead, he looks down at you. As if his time with you is running out. Everything came back to his senses once he realized that his choice of words, and actions, were all awful.
He never thought about your feelings in the process of it. He knew by then he’d lost you. His eyes went glossy so he looked the other away. “Never mind.” He stopped himself from saying anything further. Knowing if he kept going, he’ll keep fucking things up.
You only stayed quiet, you should’ve seen it coming. Him bottling up his feelings not wanting to be vulnerable with his emotions. Showing raw emotions wasn’t his thing. You should’ve left.
“If that’s how things are going to be between us, not solving anything and just ignoring each others feelings- I..”
Mingyu knew this was coming, but today?
He shook his head and now it was his turn to grab your wrist. “No don’t do this.” He held your hands and you tried pulling away from him. “I can’t Mingyu.”
No more gyu or other pet names will fall from those loving lips of yours that he adores so much. “Let me go.” You say in pure sadness.
Suddenly he felt like he was on quicksand. The world swallowing him whole and he can never reach to you. Ever.
“My bags are already packed. I’m going to Lia’s place.” He then followed you behind once you were making your way towards the bedroom.
“I’m sure you want the bed to yourself- it’s been a rough night.” You kept talking as your feet walked through the hallway where you two would often make out, make love- where you actually felt loved by him.
He didn’t reply to your words, the sounds of his footsteps behind you were the only response.
“I’ll get my keys, I’ll drive myself there.” You quickly say so he wouldn’t get the chance to offer. Not that he wanted to anyway.
He called you by your favorite nickname so you’d look at him, but your back was protecting you from seeing his face.
You let the tears stream down your cheeks as your shaky hands were trying to find your car keys. “You’re not leaving the house-“ “yes I am!”
“No you’re not!” He slammed his fist on the vanity table.
This was his first time being so loud, making you flinch. You slowly turn to him and he looked like a mess, just like you.
He repeats his words, calling you by your nickname as well “You’re not leaving me here. It’s two am. and who knows what the streets are doing-“
“I’ll be fine-“
“No, you won’t be.”
“..I’ll be fine-“
“It’s too dangerous out there.”
“I said, I’ll be fine-“
“You wont be safe!”
“This house isn’t safe anyway!”
You two exchange similar looks, both were scared. Should one hold the other? Should this argument continue? Who knows, but what you do know is that the two of you were tired.
“I’m tired of taking the blame all the time.” Your voice small, slowly you can hear the cracks forming in his heart just by looking at how miserable he is.
“I’m..”
Is he going to say it? Is he going to say it because you told him to, or is it because he really cares..
You. don’t. know.
“I’m sorry” he breathed out and your hand found the keys in your drawer. Taking it, you picked up your bag. “Should’ve said it sooner.”
He stood there in his place even when you left the house, the house you two made memories in. Walking away from him felt wrong, because he wasn’t chasing after you anymore.
Maybe that was a sign. That he was, and will never be, good for you.
part 1
part 2
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moonchild9350 ¡ 8 months ago
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Need You
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Summary: Jisung is a little needy for you.
Pairing: idol Jisung x fem reader
Genre: smut- 18+ MDNI please
Word count: 755
Warnings: cursing, p in v penetration, creampie (wrap it folks)
Note: Reblogs and comments are appreciated :)
This is in no way how Jisung is in reality. This is solely for fun.
Please do not copy, translate, modify, use, or repost this work elsewhere without my permission. Šmoonchild9350 (2024)
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Jisung came home in a rush.  He only had an hour before his next scheduled activity and he needed to see you now.  He unlocked the door, walked into your shared apartment, slamming the door behind him.  He rushed to the bedroom since you weren't in the living room or kitchen. You stuck your head out from the bathroom where you were doing your makeup.
“Hey Ji, you’re home e…” but you were cut off by your boyfriend giving you a heated kiss on the lips.  
“I only have one hour, babe, I just needed to see you, needed to feel you.” 
You nodded at his statement and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer.  Jisung continued to press kisses to your lips, his tongue swiping across your lower lip, in which you accepted.  The kiss was hot and messy, as you knew Jisung did not have much time for sweet and slow, which you did not mind one bit.  
Jisung backed you into the bathroom counter, gave you one more peck, before turning you around so your back was facing him.  He looked at you through the mirror as he bent you over the counter, running his hand down your back before giving your ass a slap.  You groaned at this, clenching your thighs together.  You loved these quick fucks, where there was only raw emotion and desperation with your and Jisung’s actions.  
You rubbed your ass against his bulge, causing him to moan out and grasp your hips tighter.  He pushed your shorts and panties down to your knees, in a hurry to sink his cock into your sweet pussy.  Taking his fingers, he brought them down to your folds, collecting your arousal.  
“You’re already so wet for me babe.  I’ve barely touched you.”  
“It’s all for you Ji, only wet for you,” you whined.  
After a few more swipes through your folds, you felt the tip of his cock breach your pussy.  Jisung rocked his hips out of pure desperation, running his cock through your folds.  He needed you.  He wanted to hear your moans that always seemed louder during these quick fucks. He couldn’t fault you at this, as it seems like he always came the hardest during these moments too.  
“Put it in Ji, I’m ready. Go ahead baby.” 
“Always so good for me, my sweet baby.” Jisung pushed his cock in, bottoming out, his eyes rolling back in his head feeling how warm, wet and tight you are.  You were right there with him, moaning at the stretch from lack of preparation.  You loved that stretch, the fine line between pain and pleasure.  You knew you could take it, so you started rocking your hips back on his cock.  
Jisung loved this sight, watching you fuck his cock, ass bouncing as it hit his pelvis.  Gripping your hips tighter, he began pounding into you, his balls slapping your clit repeatedly.  Jisung fucked you hard and deep, there was no room for being gentle.  He wanted to get you to your release fast.  Taking one hand, he quickly wet his fingers, bringing them to your clit.  With the extra stimulation, you felt close, pussy clenching repeatedly.  Grasping the counter, you rocked back on Jisung’s cock matching his pace, both of you chasing your highs.  
With a few more thrusts, you were cumming, screaming Jisung’s name, knowing surely the neighbors heard you and would probably be filing a noise complaint.  Jisung grasped your hips with both hands once more and pounded deeper into you as he was close to his release.  Three thrusts later, he was cumming, filling you up with his cum.  He ran his hand down your back once more and leaned down to kiss your neck.  He then slowly pulled out, watching as his cum oozed out of your pussy and down your thighs.  He pulled his boxers and pants back up and grabbed a towel to clean you up.  Pulling your panties and shorts back up, he gave you a kiss.
“Thank you baby, I needed that.  Was thinking about you all morning.” 
You didn’t mind, not in the least.  You gave him one last kiss before you watched Jisung walk out the bathroom. You heard him put his shoes back on and walk out the door to head back to the studio. As you listened to his exit, you could feel his cum still seeping out of you, a reminder of what had just gone down, one of the best fucks of your life.
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solxamber ¡ 3 months ago
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Hello! I saw that you said it was fine to request still, so if it's alright I'll give you my thoughts/promt if it's fine by you.
Also wanted to say i love you're fanfics! Super entertaining and well written so i was wondering if you could write one that's Vil x mermaid! Reader (romantic) the prompt is-
Vil has been slowly falling in love with the reader; not just by her beauty but her personality the two have these little meet ups where she sings/the two talk endlessly and just enjoy eachothers company, but what I'm getting with this,is that Vil would take time to process his feelings but eventually he gets there and confesses. Maybe it could be a friends x lovers?
whatever you want to do with this idea is cool beans, I just really want to see what you come up with!! Alright,that's all much love ♡♡
Vil Schoenheit x Mermaid! Reader
the idea is so big brained!!! I hope you like it <3
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Vil has always appreciated beauty. He lives and breathes it—the art of refinement, the craft of elegance. But lately, beauty has taken on a new form for him, and it looks suspiciously like you. He can’t pinpoint exactly when it started, but he knows it’s tied to those secret meetups you two share by the shoreline.
You’re a mermaid, and you make a point to remind him of that every time he mentions something about the "unbearable" human world. You always roll your eyes dramatically, your tail shimmering in the moonlight as you laugh at his over-the-top complaints about fashion disasters, inferior skincare routines, or the latest scandal in the entertainment industry.
"You humans are so fragile," you often tease, resting your chin on your hand as you float lazily in the water. "Honestly, Vil, it’s a wonder you haven’t all crumbled under the weight of your own drama."
He gives you a sharp look every time, but there’s always a trace of a smile pulling at the corner of his lips. "And yet, here you are, meeting up with one of these fragile humans every week."
"I didn’t say you weren’t entertaining," you retort with a sly grin. "It’s like watching a soap opera, except with more skincare tips."
Vil chuckles, running a hand through his perfectly styled hair, which somehow manages to stay flawless even in the salty sea breeze. "You’d be lost without my advice. I’ve seen your seaweed face masks."
You pretend to gasp, putting a hand to your chest. "Seaweed is a perfectly valid skincare ingredient! In fact, it’s far superior to that toxic concoction you call moisturizer."
"Seaweed smells like the bottom of the ocean."
"And you don’t?"
That’s how it always goes—banter, teasing, comfortable silences filled with the soft crashing of waves, and eventually, music. You sing sometimes, when the mood strikes you. It’s never anything planned; it just happens. Vil always listens, captivated, because your voice is something he can't quite describe. It's raw, but pure, untouched by the expectations of the stage or the pressures of fame.
Sometimes he sings back, though he pretends he’s only doing it because you insist. "Come on, Vil. Just a few bars. You know you want to."
"I am a professional," he says, crossing his arms. "I don’t perform on a whim."
But you know how to coax him, and soon enough, he’s harmonizing with your lilting melody, his smooth, controlled voice intertwining with yours in a way that makes the night feel magical.
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It’s been months of these little meetings, and Vil has never been quite sure what to make of you. You’re beautiful, of course—stunning, really—but that’s not what has him coming back to the shore every week.
It’s the way you make him feel completely at ease, the way you challenge him without being mean-spirited, the way you listen to him vent about things you couldn’t care less about yet still offer thoughtful responses.
And then there’s that laugh of yours—sharp, like the crack of a wave against the rocks, but warm enough to make him feel lighter every time he hears it.
He’s always valued control—over his image, his career, his emotions—but with you, he’s found himself slipping. He realizes, with some discomfort, that he’s been looking forward to these meetings a little too much. It’s not just the singing or the banter anymore. It’s... you.
That thought bothers him, because Vil Schoenheit does not get "distracted." He doesn’t fall for anyone. At least, not like this.
But here he is, walking down to the beach again, heart beating faster than usual as he anticipates seeing you. Tonight, though, something feels different. Maybe it’s the way the moon is hanging lower than usual, casting everything in a silvery glow, or maybe it’s the fact that Vil can’t deny his feelings anymore.
You’re already waiting for him when he arrives, sitting on a rock with your tail swishing lazily in the water. "Late again, Mr. Superstar?" you call out teasingly.
"I’m fashionably late, thank you," Vil replies, though there’s a softness in his voice. He takes a seat on the sand, smoothing out his coat with practiced precision before looking at you.
"You’re slipping," you say, eyeing him critically. "Usually, you’d have a comeback ready. What’s the matter? One of your beauty products finally backfired?"
Vil snorts softly, shaking his head. "No, though if it did, you’d be the first to hear about it." He looks out at the horizon, his expression thoughtful. "I’ve just been... thinking."
"Uh-oh," you say, folding your arms over your chest. "That sounds dangerous. What about?"
He hesitates for a moment, unsure of how to approach this. Vil has always been calculated, measured in everything he does. Confessing his feelings, though? That’s not something he’s prepared for. He glances at you, and suddenly, the words start spilling out before he can stop them.
"You know, for someone who claims not to care about humans, you certainly seem to enjoy spending time with me."
You raise an eyebrow, clearly intrigued by the shift in tone. "Are you fishing for compliments, Vil? Because I don’t need to stroke your ego any more than it already is."
He chuckles, shaking his head. "No, it’s just... You’re always teasing me about humans, about my world, but you keep coming back. Why?"
You tilt your head, considering his question for a moment before replying. "Because you’re interesting, Vil. You’re not like the others I’ve met. Most humans get caught up in themselves, but you... you’ve got a spark. You’re genuine, even when you’re being all high-and-mighty. And, well, it’s not like I’ve got a lot of options for good conversation under the sea."
Vil’s heart skips a beat at your words, and he finds himself smiling despite the nerves building up inside him. "I see. So I’m just your entertainment, then?"
"Oh, definitely," you say, grinning. "But you’re also... more than that."
Vil blinks, his breath catching slightly. "More?"
You nod, your expression softening. "You’re someone I look forward to seeing. I like being around you, Vil. You make me feel... seen. And I’m not just talking about my looks. It’s like you actually care about me as a person, not just a pretty face."
He swallows, his chest tightening as he listens to your words. This is it. He can’t hold it in any longer. "I do care," he says quietly, his voice trembling ever so slightly. "More than you know."
You look at him, your teasing expression fading as you sense the weight behind his words. "Vil...?"
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself. "I think... I think I’m falling for you."
There. He said it. And now his heart is racing, his palms are sweating, and for the first time in what feels like forever, Vil Schoenheit is unsure of himself. He braces for your reaction, half expecting you to laugh it off or tease him like you always do.
But you don’t. Instead, you blink at him, your mouth opening and closing as you process his confession. "You... what?"
Vil clears his throat, forcing himself to meet your gaze. "I’m in love with you," he repeats, more confidently this time. "I’ve been falling for you for a while now, and I didn’t want to admit it, but... I can’t keep it to myself anymore."
There’s a moment of stunned silence before you break into a wide smile. "Vil, you absolute idiot."
He recoils slightly. "I beg your pardon?"
You laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. "I’ve been waiting for you to say something for months now! I thought I was going to have to spell it out for you."
Vil blinks, taken aback. "You... you knew?"
"I didn’t know know," you admit, "but I had a feeling. You’re not exactly subtle, Vil."
He stares at you, a mixture of relief and embarrassment flooding his system. "Why didn’t you say anything, then?"
"Because I wanted to see how long it would take for you to figure it out yourself," you say with a smirk, leaning forward slightly. "I didn’t think it’d take this long, though."
Vil narrows his eyes, though there’s no malice in his expression. "You’re insufferable."
"And yet, you love me," you tease, reaching out to cup his cheek gently. "What does that say about you?"
He huffs, though his heart is fluttering in his chest at your touch. "That I have terrible taste."
You laugh again, the sound bright and infectious, and before Vil can say anything else, you pull him in for a kiss. It’s soft, gentle, and Vil feels like his entire world is melting away in that moment. The taste of saltwater lingers on your lips, and for the first time in a long time, Vil isn’t worried about appearances or perfection. He’s just... happy.
When you finally pull away, both of you are smiling like fools. "So," you say, your voice teasing, "does this mean we’re a thing now?"
Vil rolls his eyes, though he can’t stop the grin spreading across his face. "I suppose it does."
"Good," you say, leaning in to kiss him again. "Because I’m not letting you back out of this one, Mr. Superstar."
Vil chuckles against your lips, his hand sliding to the back of your neck to pull you even closer. "Oh, trust me," he murmurs, his voice low and smooth, "I have no intention of backing out. But I do expect you to stop wearing those dreadful seaweed masks."
You gasp dramatically, pulling back just far enough to look him in the eye. "Excuse you! Seaweed is nature’s skincare miracle, Vil. Just because it’s not wrapped in fancy packaging doesn’t mean it’s ineffective."
He raises a perfectly sculpted eyebrow, his lips curling into a playful smirk. "Perhaps, but you’ll have to let me introduce you to something a little more refined. If we’re going to be a couple, I simply can’t allow my significant other to use subpar beauty products."
"Oh, is that so?" you ask, amusement twinkling in your eyes. "I didn’t realize I was dating a beauty tyrant."
"It’s for your own good," he says with mock seriousness, though there’s a warmth behind his gaze that betrays his affection. "Think of it as part of your glow-up. You’ll thank me later."
You can’t help but laugh, your heart swelling with affection for the man in front of you. It’s strange, really—how quickly this has all come together, yet how natural it feels. You never would’ve guessed that your casual banter and late-night talks would lead to this, but now that it’s happening, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Vil reaches out and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch gentle but purposeful. "You know," he says softly, his usual sharp tone melting into something softer, "I’ve never met anyone quite like you."
You smile at him, feeling the warmth of his words settle into your chest. "I could say the same about you, Vil. You’re not as scary as people think, you know."
He chuckles, shaking his head slightly. "That’s a well-maintained persona, I’ll have you know. Can’t let people think I’m soft."
"Oh, but you are," you tease, poking him lightly in the chest. "At least with me."
He scoffs lightly, though there’s no real bite behind it. "I’ll deny it if you tell anyone."
You laugh, resting your forehead against his as you savor the closeness between you. For the first time in what feels like forever, you feel completely at peace, as if everything has fallen into place. Vil, with all his elegance, wit, and sharpness, has somehow become the person you’ve come to care about more than you ever thought possible. And now, as he holds you close, you know that you wouldn’t trade this for the world.
"I’m glad it’s you," you whisper, pressing a light kiss to his cheek. "I never thought I’d fall for a perfectionist with an ego the size of the sun, but here we are."
He lets out a soft, genuine laugh, his arms wrapping around you more securely. "I never thought I’d fall for someone who argues with me over skincare, but I suppose life has a sense of humor."
"Looks like we’re both in for a wild ride, then," you say with a grin.
Vil hums in agreement, his hand gently stroking your hair. "As long as it’s with you, I think I can handle it."
You smile, feeling your heart soar at his words. There’s a certain magic to this moment—a kind of fairy tale that feels like it’s been written just for the two of you. And as you sit there, wrapped up in each other’s warmth, you can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, this is the start of something truly beautiful.
"Well then," you say, pulling back slightly to look him in the eye, "looks like you’re stuck with me, Schoenheit."
"Forever, I hope," he says softly, before pulling you in for another kiss—this one longer, deeper, filled with the promise of something lasting.
And in that moment, with the moon shining overhead and the waves lapping gently against the shore, you know that whatever comes next, you’ll face it together..
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satorurize ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Rebound.
Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader, past satosugu
๋࣭ 𐙚˙⋆.˚cw. 18+, MDNI, angst, hurt/no comfort?, satosugu break up, bi!satoru, bi!reader, character death, sex, virginity loss, sex worker!reader, fem reader.
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What was Satoru supposed to do with this new found level of emptiness after his estranged lover, his bestfriend, his one and only, Suguru died? It was a profound emptiness settled in his chest, a void that seemed to burgeon with each passing moment. He thought grief was when Suguru had left for the first time all those years ago, but his definition of it evolved now along with the hollow ache that threatened to consume him from inside out.
A strange, uncharacteristic idea came to his mind this one time, that he'd see himself in a red light area, seeking someone's company to dull the sharp edge of his despair.
Satoru, who had no prior sexual experience because of the way his life was, apart from kisses and steamy make out sessions he shared with Suguru— comes to you, booking you for the an hour after seeing you behind the glass box in a display, swaying your body in pure sin. Your eyes magnetic, all welcoming to provide him with whatever service he'd ask for. Pretty, with your face packed with a little heavy make up and your body attired in skimpy lace lingerie, designed to draw in lonely men like him.
As you made him comfortable after leading him inside when he confimed his payment to your manager, he couldn't help but think of how this transactional relationship had a dynamic where he had been given the power to choose, a privilege he didn't have before at the exchange of only a sum of yen.
'Love is everywhere if you look hard enough.'
Satoru, who questions whether love was really this easy, convenient and cheap to get with his already distorted perception of it—when you take his hands in yours and guide him to the silken sheets of your bed inside the brothel's room that was splashed with a tacky red light in it's entirety. You were all professional and trained to bring the men or women pleasure that came to you for your company and body.
He's flippant with the way he speaks to you, nothing too unusual about him, but it's nothing you haven't handled before either. The patience and ease you talk to him by was almost clinical while you pushed your supple breasts onto his arm. It makes him a little annoyed.
"We're not gonna get anywhere if you don't tell me what you want, pretty boy" And he hums with a smile at your crafted, saccharine tone, next caressing your cheek with back of his hand with a pointed knuckle, his cerulean eyes cold and devoid of much emotion. A look that you knew well and saw often, a look of yearning. Unfulfilled, raw, yearning which leads you to the question of—
"You can pretend that I'm some other person, no judgement here" To which he bitterly scoffs, pushing you into the mattress with your wrists trapped on the either side of your head, he looked offended at what you said.
"Wouldn't chose you if I wanted you to pretend that you're him, so just be you" He stated bluntly albeit it was duplicitous considering the reason why he was here in the first place, to fulfill the gnawing emptiness inside him that he hoped you could give a temporary fix to. Yet, he felt offended that you offered he could pretend you were someone he loved, it was repulsive and a disrespect to Suguru.
You obliged as well and how he spoke to you didn't really matter with the prospect of a wad of cash waiting for you at the end of it.
That desire to forget was evident in the way he fucked you, you don't bring up how he's frantic and messy at the beginning, yet experimental in his touching. Or how he was almost shivering when he entered you, giving you a hint that this was his first time. He looks into your eyes, searching for what gets you going, but frowns at the moans being faked. He wanted you to be into it.
"Hey, no. Don't do that, give me the real ones.." He speaks with his nose craddled onto your cheek, his thumb flicking over your clit that makes you let out a mewl, so much more natural.
"Yeah..this is what I'm talking about.." He rasps, grasping the way you wanted you clit rubbed and you decide to supplement it with some advice. "Slow down your thrusts..fucking hard isn't always ideal.."
The man accepted your guidance although not without passing a few words of playful mockery, "And here I thought I was the one getting serviced.."
Before you couldn't clarify that he didn't have to, the roll of his hips becomes calculated, your back getting lifted in a prompt arch by it, when his tip ridged against your spongy g-spot each time.
His mouth latched onto your nipples, leaving them damp and glossy as he alternated between them, the buds becoming tender at his incessant tongue and teeth, your hands traveled on his defined back and down to his buttocks when he snapped himself into you faster and harder, indicating building up of his climax.
He doesn't think of Suguru as his face contorts in pleasure, blinded of his feelings as he hears your dulcet sounds, passing your pretty lips like a sweet refrain supplemented with the way you clenched around him like a vice at the sight of his handsome face contorted in pleasure with a soft furrow of his brow.
He was so devastingly beautiful, especially when his whimpers octaved higher with a cute hitch of his breath and a strangled moan passing his lips as he pulls out, stroking himself to shoot ropes of his ivory cum onto your tummy, your mouth falling agape at how much came out. Wow, he was deprived enough to not even jerk off.
His chest heaved as his head was tipped back momentarily, before he focused his gaze on you again. "Shit..you didn't cum, did you?" He leaned in a little—voice taking on a huskier quality as he smeared his release onto your abdomen, so nastily. His concern to rhythmically make you orgasm along with him leads an unfamiliar flutter in your stomach. He acted differently after the fuck session, less guarded, more..desperate after the feel of your pussy. Ugh. Men. And how they thought with their dicks.
You just laugh out of sheer surprise when he props himself between your legs with your thighs weighted on his broad shoulders. No client was ever so set on to make you cum. It was a little cute, pathetic even, compared to how arrogant he was before.
However, a knock on the door with a sharp warning saying "Time's up sweetheart!" From your manager indicated how your time together was up and there was a next client in line—just when his mouth was millimeters away from your drooling cunt made you chew on your bottom lip to press down a smile at the utter disappointment written on his face.
"Yeah! Send them in, in 20.." you spoke loud enough that your manager heard you while you cleaned yourself up, getting ready for another round of work while Satoru was being hit with intense bout of post-nut clarity as he too got dressed.
He slept with someone who wasn't Suguru and he felt jealous that someone would touch every crevice of your fucking body like he did just now, all over again? Why is he bothered anyway, it's your job. You're not Suguru.
And still, he leaves with money on your desk more than what was agreed on and a kiss on your lips. While he convinced himself of a lie that he wasn't starting to develop something and it was all just to distract himself from Suguru—how it was a one time thing anyway but becomes a regular at the place, always demanding you, never forgetting to make you cum like he did, the first time.
Afterall, you were just a distraction. Right?
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