#it's just a fucking fact im sorry it's true
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Got a packidge today from Ireland and it's an adorable embroidery that @andordean made, I'm so so so very happy and so grateful and... 😭❤️😭❤️😭❤️😭!!!
#i swear to god m#y moots are the best people on this earth#it's just a fucking fact im sorry it's true#hnnngg!!!!!#TT____TT#the Skadi is sneefing and snorfing the boxes by the way#she inspecc
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everypony hates me for my complete and utter disrespect of authority
#99.txt#ouhb u think youre above me for arbitraty made up reaons. and IM the asshole with a problem ?? okay detention for me :(#ive been like this i think since i was born. maybe it comes with the tism#but like. hierarchy is made up im not gona play your stupid game#and ppl like doctors and stuff have to earn credibility. im not gona believe everything you say just cos u have this job. damn#everyone in the world is just another person you cant believe everything they say just cos they have some specific job#''did you hear [xyz] is true !! it says so in this news article'' ok well a journalist is still some fucking guy#especially opinion pieces.... ''youre gona disagree with this ??? but it was in an article !!!'' sry yeah i am... 🤷♂️#ppl who take everything word for word without thinking about it are stupid..... sorry#studying stuff is supposed to make you think about it. not just memorize it#aauououagh ''jung or whoever said this so its a True Universal Psychological Fact !!'' nu uuhhh !!! just some guy. you have learned nothing#return to start do not pass go !!!#idk why am i making myself mad about this at 4am 💀💀 this is literally from nowhere#but i think a lot of ppl put way more stake in authority than they realise....#dude i flat out dont believe in the concept of authority. and if youre saying youre above people youre an insane person#i have recieved many a detention... many a sent to back of the class
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oh lord people cannot write blade they can't they have to be allergic to it or SOMETHING
#GAWWDDDD THE POST ABOUT FANDOMS JUST RECYCLING TROPES REGARDLESS IF THEY FIT THE CHARACTER ARE TRUE WHAT IS THISSS#how are people making him boring...either gross as fuck or just fucking BORING#now. i haven't gotten to him in the story story but going off of his voicelines and his story in the character screen...cmon now#the lack of reading comprehension im so sorry this is so saddd how are we fumbling this badly#people are NOT familiar with the fact that there is more than one way to love... there's just this sanitized version of the idea of love#and its soooo sick!!! to write is to actually use your imagination and stuff yk??? what are we doing rnnn#oughOUGH ITS SO SAD HE SEEMS LIKE SUCH AN INTERESTING CHARACTER AND YOURE GIVING ME THE SAME 2 OHHH DARK AND NEEDLESSLY EDGY TROPES 😭⁉️#absolutely insaneeeee this is such an egregious and malicious L 😞😞😞#☆.sunni squeaks
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One day I will learn, that just because the bottle is low, does not mean I need to finish off the bottle.
#imma be so fuckin hungover tomorrow#someone should kiss me#and i moght be either asexual or aromantic or both which like woo thats funny to only me for so many trauma reasons#i love#im so drunk#i too drunk#i stated typing thos at 12:30#imma smoke pot after i post this#if your reqding my tags hi i love you. why are you reading this though like im a schizo bipolar depreased trans girl im unhinged in the tags#i need to stop drinking by myself#if think im an alcoholic as well if it wasnt for the fact that i can genuinely stop when ever i want but idkmaybe that changes?#at this point im just typing to annoy myself cause i think its funny to annoy other people and itd be hypothetical to not annoy myself#im ramblimg in the tags and honestly its your fault for still reading this#trans thought time#i wish i was born with a pussy but i do like having a cock and there is a possibility im genderfluid and fuck me that sucks if true#like how do you transition if your genderfluid? like i kinda want a cock and pussy and i know thats an actual option#but is it the right option?#i hate being trans but not knowing what kinda trans maybe ill hit where im at with my gender and just say tranny#cause i already say faggot for my sexuality instead of anything specific maybe i should just say tranny#this is probably what a therapist is for but idk if i can justify paying for this instead of saving money to buy a hoise#america sucks#capitalism sucks#love is such a bullshit thing#how can i be in love with some ane be in love with someone. being in love is nothing but selfish but also you have to be selfish for youryou#like i know that doesn't make sense sense but it makes sense to me and i also know its wrong#maybe i should give up and spend money on a therapist#i love my freinds and would sacrifice myself for them literally#12:51 and i have one more short tag to add#i hope you didnt read this far cause even in a drunk state this tag is embarrassing and im sorry you know me irl im sorry this is rambly+ugh#but if you dead read all the tags <3 i love yoh and would die for you
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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tell me about your correct opinions. I love hearing opinions...
Honestly I can't think of any specifics rn hdggjndg I just know I am a Nishikiyama Understander. I think one off the top of my head is that yes, he's clearly more emotional than others, but he is not remarkably so and he is NOT a 'crybaby'. Like every time he's cried on screen it's been for very understandable reasons and in highly emotional situations.
Or the idea that him not reciprocating Reina's feelings is like, an inherent character flaw??
#smol responds#dont get me started on k_zum_ji i will appear to be such a hater and im NOT i SWEAR its just i dont think theyre built for a cutesy domesti#relationship theyre FUCKED okay aaaand im gonna shut up they WILL kill me xgmdkg#also my opinions on the first half of the ship on his own cause like i KNOW he's beloved i KNOW his heart is in the right place but GODDDDD#HE PISSES ME OFFFFF and part of my frustration comes from the fact I recognise myself in him and it hurts man!!! We Cannot Keep Doing This!#Maybe one day I'll collect my Discord ramblings together fsjjf also i realise how full of myself i sound??#in that im not just a Fan but an Understander cause i do feel there's a difference. Its like with my bestie she loves this one character#and other people call themselves the no. 1 fan and i believe em i think she's the true Understander though yknow?#classic 'i love this guy AND i see how he really sucks and i love that' and she says im the same with Nishiki#I see his flaws man and i get em i SEE where he got this from but im bot disliking him as some 'incel niceguy' like its not a common take#but ive seen it a couple times and im like are you stupid??? hes not some wifebeater?? are you daft?? no he shouldnt have slapped her#but if your takeaway from that is 'he hates women' or some shit you might be a fool. Shoutout Atanx for that very correct post a while back#sorry turns out i DO have opinions lmao basically Nishiki Is Mine Yall Cant Have Him zfhzfn#WAIT MY MIREI OPINIONS- [i am dragged away once more]
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sorry to young royals but *haymitch voice* simon could live a hundred lifetimes and NEVER!!!!!! ever deserve wilhelm
#’YOU’RE JUST LIKE YOU’RE MOTHER!!!’ DO YOU MEAN ???? THE QUEEN ???????#he will never understand#uwu im sad bc vilhelm cant be w me and actually the audience should be on my side#SHOULD THEY ?????????#hes the PRINCE !!!!! YOU WERE AWARE OF THAT FACT THE WHOLE TIME !!!!!!!!#simon is literally just a generic angsty teenager#*on my knees begging* please dear writers properly convey wilhelms struggles#please atleast make simon TRY to understand#hes selfish and only cares about his own interests……..#sorry but its True#im sorry that dating the fucking prince wasn’t easy lmao#HE COULD LIVE !!! A HUNDRED LIFE TIMES!!! AND NEVER DESERVE THAT BOY#im swedish so im allowed to say these things btw#god they better fucking break up in the finale i beg of you#wilhelm deserves so much better
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screaming crying yelling my prof being like 'have any of you written fictional stories before' as i have my messy breakup masadai fic open in another tab
#snap chats#//THROWS UP//#ITS THE WAY HE WAS LIKE 'oh can you talk about your process :) do the characters live in your head do you hear them'#and im just sitting here like absentmindedly talking like#'oh yeah i guess they do haha uh like whenever i write something 'they wouldnt do' i hear them say 'i wouldnt do that''#which is true whenever i go to write one of these fucks doing something and its not right i hear a bitch in my ear like#'i woudlnt fucking say that' like youre so right my queen im sorry let me reread the text fifty times to get it right#ITS HOW HE GOT SO ENTHUSIASTIC TOO LIKE 'oh my gosh really :00 isnt that so fun isnt that cool :DD'#if it werent for the fact i can perfectly hear will yun lee in my head at any given time then sure i guess#anyway my professor doesnt understand the depths of my mental illness but im glad fanfic writing has become relevant to my academic career
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huh. i mean uhhhh yea yea that was intentional i know what i'm doing
#yes yes im a good artist i do ''studies'' and look at ''theories''#i just fucking love clouds dude#the true inspiration for that sky was the fact that the artwork for lost for a while by red vox changed my life#i havent been the same since. clouds are their own work of art in my eyes now JDHKDH#favorite album cover ever tbh#objectively lamer answer than intentional Themes And Such in a drawing jdhjdh#ty for the sea of gold comment tho later in these tags i an thriving now#something something healing and gold. sunflowers and life and death and hope. i will think on this tonight <333#also something something coldplay yellow joke 👍#this has nothing to do with anything hut i just gotta say it since i mentioned it#yellow is mid. sorry. least interesting song on that album 😭 IT'S SO OVERPLAYED EVERYTHING ELSE IS *RIGHT THERE*#chat
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people with restrictive eds being overly aware that being skinny does in fact come with "social currency" if you will vs naturally skinny people being convinced they are being disctiminated against for being skinny
#im sorry if you've ever lost weight or struggle with restrictive eating in general you KNOW you will be rewarded the lower you go#kinda ties in to the whole health thing#when i was the sickest aka lowest ive ever been guess what? everyone was so impressed and happy lol#not trying to pat myself in the back just sharing my experience. you will be praised for being skinny and you will be punished for gaining#we can sit and pretend skinny is out but that wont make it true#tw/ ed#oh and as another fun fact. when my knees got fucked i by mere coincidence was at my highest#so of course the doctor just said 'lose some weight' as if all that weight hadnt only been there for like 2 months#meanwhile my fucked knee had been there for years. but yes im sure it's the weight i gained last month thanks for that
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I think if merui livesteams 1.8 i may possibly drop by to watch some of it.
#certified storm moments#im just intrigued at how the storyline would go#and the fact that windsong was sent by zeno to strictlly only do what they told her to do#so would that either mean there's a betrayal scene or her going 'fuck zeno im helping these guys out idgaf'#something something her character intro being 'best case scenario they call me professor or doctor windsong; worse they call me: liar'#im just entertaning an eventual betrayal scene for the possibility of the most homoerotically divorce-coded exchange w/ vila once#she and/or the others find out about windsong and zeno's hidden agenda#some dude said this on twt and its been on my mind ever since. please bluepoch i beg u to make this true#i'm sorry for being yuri-pilled😔 it will happen again
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That was probably my last fanfic for a while. Just so everyone knows. rambling in the tags for the curious.
#grems know bc ive been moaning about it but writing takes a lot out of me especially because im unmedicated#im out of ideas for narumitsu and writing for franmaya to dramatically less audience is fucking depressing#it's not that i dont appreciate the interaction i DO get it's just that i want to write franmaya and it seems like nobody cares about it#i dont care if that makes me vain or overly dependent on flattery or a bad writer. maybe that's true.#i have come a long long way on not needing outside validation but that doesnt change the fact that writing for a void is depressing#any fics i write are already written for my friends at this point and published for my own sense of self satisfaction#but all my ideas left are franmaya + very long and very involved and i just dont have it in me anymore#if you like my writing then please follow my game dev account#it's @sadghoststudios everywhere#i want to write something that fulfils me and is worth my time and maybe fanfiction isnt that anymore#and im working on some game stuff that is gonna be really awesome. it deserves to be my primary project for once#hashtag promo if you like AA you'll like what im working on :))))) sigh#i have a great catalog of fics im really proud of. and i dont regret a second i spent writing them#but i think i'm done. for now at least#sorry. thanks for everything
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yk i think like. im trying desperately not to depress people around me w how close to doomerism i can veer but like. at a certain point its like. the effort and exhaustion that goes into maintaining just being alive in this world is not worth what comes from being alive and like. girlies we may have reached it. el oh el.
#like obvs its different for everyone like. what i really mean is that i have reached it or like. tht was always inevitably the case#for my life. which ik feels really depressing to say nd im sorry tht it makes ppl sad but idk like. its just true at a certain point#absolutely not from a lack of trying from the good things within my life to be clear not at all like. ik have sm great parts to my life#tht like. just mean so so much to me and im so so lucky to have but as upsetting as it is to say and think abt#at a certain point having to choose between being trapped in a situation were you can never authentically exist or like#have any control over your life and exist on your own terms even in v small ways while having to constantly be around people whove#caused you so much pain and trauma and hurt and being is a situation were like. at best your constantly working to afford living and you#are constantly exhausted by this and have no time for being yourself anyway and at worst you just cant afford anything and you die#and that could happen to you at any point idk like. these are my two options and i cant change anything about that fact#no matter how much i want to and that feeling is just. so so crushing and inescapable and just idk i dont know how to deal with it#like. idk iv done everything to try to but its only ever a temporary distraction#bc the problem isnt fucking like. mental or emotional its the facts of my reality and that cant be changed#so ofc im going to be constantly fucking miserable things just. are misearble#and idk. im sorry tht thts something other ppl have to deal with when it comes to like. knowing me bc genuinly its like.#they dont deserve that its sm pain for somoene to deal with and if that someone isnt. somone whos come to term with what#my fate invetiably is like have ik its too much nd im sorry for like. putting that on ppl i just. idk im sorry#idk what up with me suddnely. i mean i do but like. idk why i cant just hold it together like. this has always been the case idk why#im letting it upset me sm suddenly . ig bc i let myself have hope at some point. like an idiot.#idk im sorry. and its nearly 1am so i think im just going to go to sleep.im so sorry for just. all of this.#lucy if your reading tihs im so sorry for not sending and answering asks but i want to say that i love you so so so much. and im sorry#flappy rambles#vent#ask to tag
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my pattern of girls i've had crushes on is so funny
#like in elementary school i had little girl crushes but i couldnt really articulate that they were crushes#and then in ms i liked the only other 2 gay girls i knew because thats how it goes#then in hs i was like fuck it. ima go all in and have crushes on whoever#so then it was like. one straight girl 2 years older than me. one lesbian 2 years younger than me.#one straight girl dating one of the hottest men at our school and she was madly in love with him.#pretty sure those are the only major ones Hah#only bringing this up bc my MALE SITUATIONSHIP had the AUDACITY to tell me he DOESNT THINK IM ACTUALLY GAY#AND IM CONVINCED HE WAS JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE HE DOESNT WANT ME TO BE A LESBIAN#LIKE BE SO REAL.#also he gets offended whenever ppl bring up the fact that the only men i find attractive are men who look like girls#like sorry that its true. u look like a girl babe.#r
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lit cannot stress how much fuckability masato lost after becoming aoki like emo death is real and its so so tragic
#snap chats#sorry but this has been my truth for months its time i speak on it#its true tho i dont think this is a shocking revelation to anyone#s'just like saying grass grows and birds fly#i will not support his prep phase its not happening hes such a dweeb now#rgg knew this fact with him showing off his tit despite that being like. The Worst Place Ever to inject yourself#we already discussed how he wasnt physically able to fuck and that was a nerf it was to humble him and keep him controlled and thats awful#frame one got me lookin at the screen like 👁👁 and then he open his mouth and my eyes get bigger and i sit in dead silence#was crackin jokes and chattin with myself every other second and then 🧍♂️ Go On Beautiful Keep Talking Idc What You Sayin#im a man until he starts talking about 'his girl' and then suddenly im feeling some kinda way#tho that might just be cringe cause why does bro talk like how i used to in high school 😭😭😭😭#thats the funniest part about masato/aoki to me like. there's so much bullshit bout them that reminds me of high school#but thats the thing that was High School like im grown an shit this bro never grew up apparently AND HE STARTS THE GAME AT 23#wait back to the subject line of this post i be acting like aoki dont got me unwise a total of like. four time either#sorry everyone there was something in the water today and now im ill#its cause i cant draw this weekend so i have to be disgusting some other way#gonna make it everyone else's problem but worse#anyway i have to end this post because the more i t hink about the high school comparison the more i start to cringe
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Hi! Have you seen that nct jaehyun, dooyoung and jungwoo made a sub-unit? Their song is called perfume and it is just SO FUN! The song itself reminds me of some of the old suju songs because the beat is so fun and makes you wanna dance, but the choreography is also ridiculously fun! You should check it out) I was reading your posts about the lack of fun in kpop, and this was honestly very refreshing to see. The mini-album is also quite good, and they even did a live-band cover of their songs. As always, nct guys are incredibly talented musically, good job
i actually really did not like their release....or their subunit.....or the album............
#like are they musically talented? yes. are the songs fine and technically good? sure#but i find them SO bland and im pissed off that theyre using the full nct brand for this discount cbx nonsense#should have been an nct lab!!! or an sm station!!!#also ngl i fucking hate the mv. like i HATE it. i have NO patience for pov fanservice stuff it makes my skin crawl. its insufferable#is it an effective method? sure. but i am NOT the target audience and am very much Too Gay for that#its one of my true pet peeves. i really. really fucking hate it and the fact that the mv was mostly like. 'chic perfume commercial'#was quite literally rage inducing.#so uh. sorry. that release is actually the opposite of fun (for me)#text#answers#nct w#slkdjfsd im so sorry you send me an ask and its RIGHT on a topic that i feel very strongly in the negative about lmao#pls dont be offended its not personal#also i need to clarify. i never said that kpop itself wasnt fun. kpop has and will always be fun.#i specifically said that a lot of fans (kpoppies) TREAT kpop like its not fun/actively eschew the fun parts of kpop#like flop groups or brighter concepts or just. taking it all too damn seriously#fans are not willing to look outside the main popular groups and so they dont actually SEE groups doing fun and cool and interesting things#like if you want to watch an actually fun mv go watch blitzers macarena#also idk how to tell you this but. ACTUAL nct music is so insanely fun. this ''subunit'' was just made to appease all the ''fans''#who complain nonstop about 'how nct sucks now' when THEY DONT Y'ALL JUST WONT ACCEPT THAT YOU DONT LIKE SOMETHING UR FAVES MADE#anyways. i will stop talking now since this is probably gonna make ppl mad lmao#my nuclear take is that most nct fans dont actually like nct as a concept. they only like the idols. and those people are wrong
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