#it's just SO FUNNY TO ME

[soaps-mohawk]

Building off of the anon who said Simon has beef with Omega's bear; I saw that and immediately imagined those TikToks where the boyfriends wait for their partners to leave the room so they can punch their Squishmallows and other stuffed animals. Imagine Simon just *throttling* the bear for the hell of it and Omega catches him and bans him from her nest for a week for bullying her bear 😭

Definitely happens when he's just chilling in her nest and the bear is just sitting there staring at him with those beady eyes wearing his shirt.

Gets up to berate it and things get heated and the reader walks out of the bathroom and sees him throttling it. Gets all upset about her precious ghost bear and how it didn't do anything to him and boots him out of the nest 🤣

Goes pouting to Johnny and Johnny's just like..."You beat up an innocent teddy bear? You deserve it." 😂

[chibitorra]

Loid Forger is so fucking funny.

Like he’s this world renown spy. He’s very sharp and quick-witted. He’s able to pick a person out of a crowd by simply their gait or decode an incredibly obscure SSS conversation about some wine.

But 73 chapters into this story and he still hasn’t picked up on the fact that his daughter is a fucking telepath, or that his wife kills people on the reg.

Like, what is this man even doing lmao

[rosekasa]

post kwami's choice marinette couldn't POSSIBLY be THAT normal about chat noir so quickly SURELY. bc i cant stop imagining adrien sitting next to his girlfriend on the bench at school while she sketches on her iPad -- STILL having not managed to even hold her hand yet -- and just as he's about to compliment how cute the little cat she just drew is she accidentally minimises the canvas and an entire gallery of self insert art of her kissing chat noir on the mouth pop up and she SHRIEKS.

[they-didnt-last]

currently reading the lockwood and co books, and nothing could have prepared me for how much lucy fucking hates george in them. literally every chance she gets, she just roasts the shit out of him. she will be describing the most mundane of actions and still find a way to insult him. absolute hater behavior, i'm obsessed

[radiosummons]

I'm having a lot of fun with Link's inherent Tony Hawkness lmao

[doom-dreaming]

I love finding wild screenshots on Halopedia.

No one is looking in the same direction. Linda is staring directly at the camera like some sort of armored cryptid.

[pearlynia]

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

How'd you spend your last day of 2023? For me I just read a fic about Harry Potter's dead father and Harry Potter's dead dogfather's long dead brother falling in love over and over again till 4am🧍🏻‍♀️

[beantothenighe]

Something I just noticed about Adam's battle robe in the final episode.

There is a gold leaf thing sitting where his crotch would be! How did it not click till now?! Why didn't any of you tell me? I feel a fool Adam you loser, Eden was 10,000 years ago. Move on.

[sbd-laytall]

Okay, this is genuinely the funniest snarky remark an opponent has said in this series.

[firefighterkinard]

People always joke about the 118 being very clique-y but rarely mention the sheer hilarity of Hen inviting Bobby for drinks in Bobby Begins Again, and Bobby showing up to find a grand total of three people there, and one of them is the person who invited Bobby!

Or the part in The One that Got Away that basically confirms that, yeah, Tommy was probably only other person from the 118 that Hen and Chimney gave a fuck about.

[7nsomnia]

the fact that it's been 16 days since Justice came out and I've already made over 30 gifsets. normal behavior

[qsmp-construction-worker]

still thinking about the fact that cellbit thinks bad is on the pills because he was having fun messing around with his vtuber model.

[solitarelee]

I actually have a unique reason why I can't use tampons and use pads instead!

Tampons make me pass out. Immediately.

Let me explain my tmi story.

Initially, I thought it was just a panic attack because I was freaked out about putting a tampon in. It happened twice, a couple years apart, so I just didn't use tampons. But, somewhere in my early twenties, I was like, I've had sex now and am comfortable with my body and tampons are no longer scary and I'm sick of pads. It was July 4th and I was wearing a cute dress and wedge heels. My sister and mom re-explained how to use them to me and I went and bought some. We went to my dad's house to pick something up and I decided to just do it there.

Now, my family is very open about bodies and sex and things like that, but I didn't mention to my dad that I was trying tampons again because it just didn't occur to me to do so.

I go upstairs, insert the tampon, pull my underwear (with a pad in it just in case) back up, and stand up to look myself in the mirror over the sink.

Immediately, I feel like I'm going to pass out. I've passed out many times in my life and know what it feels like. The color drains from my face, my ears start ringing, I break into a cold sweat, the works. I stumble over to the bathroom room, leaning heavily on the handle, and call for my sister.

Me: "[Sister]!"

Sister: *annoyed* "What?"

Me: *trying not to pass out* "[Sister]!!"

Sister: *more annoyed* "What?!"

Me: *losing steam* "[Sister]...!"

Sister: "Fine! I'm coming."

She takes one look at me and goes, "oh my god."

Thankfully, my sister was a certified nursing assistant and much stronger than me, so she has no trouble moving me back over to the toilet. I'm mumbling that I'm gonna pass out and she's trying to talk to me but I'm having trouble communicating at that point.

Then my head hits the back of the toilet and apparently I twitched weirdly.

My sister screams, "DAD, GET UP HERE!!!"

He comes up the stairs and, remember, he has no idea what's going on. Usually he's very confident in situations like this, but I think because my sister already had a hold of me and he had nothing to do, he just stood there in shock.

A few seconds later, I'm conscious again, but not fully lucid. My sister asks, dead serious, "Do you want me to remove the tampon?" And I say yes.

Hilariously, she tells my dad to turn around, even tho I would not have cared if he saw.

My sister, absolute hero, removes my tampon for me, tosses it, pulls my underwear back up, takes off my heels, and helps me into my bedroom next to the bathroom to lay down in bed.

Eventually my mom comes over to check on me as well while I have water and the a/c going to cool me off. We're all discussing it, trying to figure out what happened.

Panic attack? No, I wasn't nervous at all.

Incorrectly inserted? No, my sister confirmed it looked correct, since she got a look at it.

Toxic shock?? That shouldn't happen immediately tho...

Allergic??? Would I be allergic to cotton only vaginally??????

Unable to figure it out that day, once I was more recovered, we moved on to celebrate the fourth of July.

It was another year or two later, when I had to get my first pap smear as an adult, that I discovered that speculums ALSO make me pass out. They couldn't complete my pap smear because of it.

Was I allergic to cotton and surgical steel only vaginally?????? That made even less sense.

It was when I was seeing a different doctor the next year, this time at Planned Parenthood, for a pap smear that we discovered a probable explanation.

It's probably pressure on a vasovagal nerve, the rectal one specifically.

There's a rectal nerve that they have to be careful about with enemas and colonoscopies because it will sometimes make people pass out, according to this doctor.

But every body is shaped differently and the nerve must be just close enough to the vaginal canal that pressure will activate it. It doesn't help, I later discovered, that my uterus tilts fairly far forward (more than most people's but not outside the norm), so to get to the cervix, a doctor has to use the lip of the speculum to dip under my cervix and tilt it upwards in order to get the pap smear. So they're directly putting pressure downwards, toward that nerve when doing so. It likely doesn't happen during sex or masturbation because the area engorges with blood during arousal and the vaginal canal actually extends, so the pressure downward doesn't penetrate. Plus, during sex, pressure typically doesn't direct downwards anyways.

And that's why I can't use tampons!

I've considered the cups, but those seal with pressure and I worry that would press on the nerve as well. I have since been able to successfully complete a pap smear a couple times with caution, using a smaller speculum, and warning the doctor beforehand, altho I alway feel bad afterwards cuz I get close to passing out and feel nauseous for a while.

it's her.................... it's the vagina that makes you swoon dramatically

btw I also have a VERY VERY VERY tilted uterus (mine's to the point where it causes issues) and I have the same problem re: pap smears. my bro my guy my sis my fam they hurt so fucking bad when ur tilted and i don't think that's very known. my gyno is very apologetic about it but i get horrible cramps for weeks after due to the maneuvering they have to do to get in there.

[scarstarved]

Please show the standee

Who the fuck is thisss?? 🤣 noOOoo.... please, help me. I'm so embarassed, dude. He's 6ft tall... I don't know where to put him. I first bought it as a joke, because I thought 'oh haha we going back into our obsession bad since the first film', and then experienced immediate buyers remorse when I saw the order confirmation. Like, who just buys a Patrick Wilson standee? I have no room.

[forzafinally]

"Charles is good, Charles is easy, he's very quick." Sebastian Vettel you fascinate me. Sebchal teammates you will always be remembered.

[girlfrommars28]

If I had a nickel for every time a person who would later become a Knight of Camelot was injured and unconscious then brought to Merlin's bed, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.