#it's honestly not funny how often it keeps happening even though I did laugh at some instances

[eashgirl]

I'm not going to lie,looking back I'm surprised no one ever really mentions how many times Skywarp keeps getting backstabbed, it's happened so many times I'm wondering if it's one of the staples to his charecter at this point.

G1 : got betrayed by Starscream and thrown out of the ship and left to die,just so they could lighten the load

IDW : betrayed by both Starscream, Thundercracker and if I'm not wrong Galvatron as well.

Wfc trilogy : backstabbed by Jetfire (quite literally)and died,just before informing Starscream of the betrayal.

Earthspark: got betrayed by Starscream twice when he left her and Nova storm to save himself,and when he turned on every other decepticon

Transformers Prime(novels) : betrayed by Starscream who sent him out on a suicide mission with the intent of blowing him up just because he got jealous Megatron complimented another seeker Infront of him,and then got killed by a sharkticon when he was plotting starscream's murder.

Cyberverse: kind of indirect but starscream betrayed every other seeker and she was the only survivor.

Skybound : self explanatory, I don't think I even need to explain how messed up his treatment was here.

Idw2 : ok this one probably does not qualify as I think he WAS the one who kept being a turncoat and switching allegiances at merry whim since for the most part he was pretty trigger happy/crazed,but definitely has hilariously horrible luck.

Armada(comics) : betrayed by Scavenger

[oldwritingm]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Ninjago x fem!reader in which the reader is a super nice cutesy person, but is really scary when she gets mad. Basically, she's the embodiment of "looks like a cinnamon roll, but could actually kill you"

Yes ofc!

Ninjago - Ninjas With a Sweet and Terrifying s/o

Kai

Don't get me wrong, he loves it when you're cute, but he ADORES it when you get mad

He just gets this starstruck/amazed face with rosy cheeks while he watches you

But the first time he saw you get mad he was terrified

Once you cooled down again he realized that it was kind of... hot?

Honestly he probably tries to get you mad again at least once

He wouldn't want it directed at him, of course, so he'd come up with some crazy scheme to get you mad at one of the other ninjas

And of course it totally backfires and you end up blowing up at him

And then he never messes with you again

(dw, he came clean about the plan and you guys talked it out)

You think it's kind of funny that he's attracted to your "demon mode"

One time you winked at him after absolutely DESTROYING someone in battle, and he just. exploded.

Like, he actually burst into flames.

You, being the sweetheart that you are, rushed to his side to make sure he was okay, and you never did it again

(he secretly wishes you would though)

Jay

Jay has a thing for girls that could kill him I think

So while he thought you were pretty cute, he really only fell in love with you when he saw you mad for the first time

He was honestly less terrified and more enamored

In that moment he decided two things:

One, that he'd never make you mad (on purpose) because he would actually die

And two, that he had to make you fall in love with him

He definitely pulls the "My girlfriend could totally beat you up!!" card when he's in trouble

And if his enemies see you, of course they just laugh

But they're not laughing when they're in a pile on the floor, bruised like peaches put through a drying machine

Meanwhile you and Jay are just skipping away, hand in hand, like two giddy schoolkids

He always reminds you how cool you are too

"That was awesome, Y/n! You're so cool... <3"

Cole

He finds your duality interesting

He loves your cute side, especially when you're being all affectionate with each other

Getting all fluffy with you is definitely one of his favorite pass-times

But he also totally respects your tough side

He learns pretty quick to get out of your way when you're mad, especially in battle

He'll just get all quiet and take a few steps back, whispering to the other ninjas to do the same

Ever since you first got mad in front of him he knew this was necessary if he didn't want to get blended like a smoothie

He likes keeping your dangerous side secret; he loves the dumbfounded looks on peoples' faces when they see you mad

And when they give him the "did you know about this??" look, he just nods with a smirk

It's an expression that seems to say "yep, that's my girlfriend. she is insane and I love her."

And when you start to cool down, he'll approach carefully to check if you're okay (emotionally and physically)

If you're hurt, bandaging you up is a good excuse reason for Cole to be by your side while you try to relax

Zane

Zane is truly terrified of you

He loves you, but he has a deeply internalized vow to never tick you off

He was shocked to silence the first time he saw you mad, and he couldn't speak for a long time after either

You eventually had to ask him if something was wrong, and he just stared at you

"Does that... happen a lot?"

You laugh sheepishly, reassuring him that you weren't like that all the time

The sweetness of your voice puts him at ease

Your bubbly personality always manages to calm him when he gets scared of you

After a while he doesn't get scared as often; he just stays out of your way (advising others to do the same) and looks forward to seeing your cute smile again :)

And he even starts to appreciate your tough side, especially if/when you prove yourself useful on missions

He'll just watch you silently, at once grateful for and fearful of your rampage

Lloyd

He finds your stark two-sidedness somewhat alarming

Especially because he thinks he's good at reading people; when he first met you, he was certain that you were just this sweet girl

And then when he saw you mad, his mind was blown

He felt like he didn't know you at all

But, if anything, that was just motivation for him to actually get to know you

He loves all the intricacies of both of your sides

Your cute side he loves because he can get all soft and cuddly with you :)

And your harsh side he loves because you know how to stand up for yourself, and you certainly know how to get what you want

He's usually the first one at your side when you start to calm down

He'll be beaming with pride but trying to speed up your cooldown at the same time

He'll tell you that it's all right now, and you can relax

And then he'll kiss your cheek, smiling when you switch back to your sweet side and kiss him back

Nya

She's ecstatic to meet someone like her

She's definitely someone who's capable of sweetness and destruction, depending on her (often unpredictable) temper

Because of her touchy temper, she's more prone to destruction though...

But that just means she knows what to do when you're mad

She steps out of your way most of the time, but she also loves to get involved

Especially if she has the slightest reason to be mad too

You guys are a force of nature when you're both mad

And only you can get each other to cool down, because you understand each other

Nya knows how to relax you, and while she typically indulges in rage with you, she also knows that sometimes you just need to chill out

She's probably the only person brave enough to approach you when you're mad, let alone to try and calm you down

But you always cool off at least a little at the sight of her

And it's the same for her; she only listens to you when she's mad

Soon enough you two are back to being sweet girlfriends 😌 (just ignore the broken stuff surrounding you)

[chevelleneech]

As delusional as they are, it’s kind of interesting watching Tkkrs construct their version of events in real time.

I’m usually working when an episode of AYS airs, so I always see their take on things hours later, and after already having seen other people’s opinions. But to be one of the people who watched it a little earlier, so I saw the scenes before seeing anyone else’s opinions, I can genuinely say, it’s honestly almost fascinating to watch them squirm.

People can think whatever they want about JM and JK and their bond, but to see Tkkrs go from “Jimin was the third wheel!” as they cropped him out of stills or as they claimed Tkk were cuddled up despite it being a quick photo, last week to seeing how they are almost completely ignoring the show this week is wildly funny.

The Jikook tag on Twitter is currently a lot of “Jokers will always be Tae’s number one fan!” “Jokers can’t keep Tae’s name out their mouth!” “Even after all their so-called moments, Jokers only care about Tae!” even though there aren’t actually a lot of Tae centered posts coming from Jikookers. And when they’re not trying to claim Jikookers are for whatever reason focused on Tae, they’re saying all the Jikook moments that happened this episode don’t matter, because Tae and JK went on a trip without cameras, while Jimin and Jungkook said in episode one they hadn’t seen each other in a bit.

I don’t know. It just really interests me how they are so comfortable and so confident in how they decide what matters and what doesn’t, and how they twist whatever else is left to be in their favor. Are You Sure? was scripted bullshit for a year, plus the first two episodes. Episode three was proof JK actually wanted Tae, and Jimin was the tagalong. Now episode 4 is irrelevant because Tkk went on a trip last year or whenever, without filming it.

Their reasoning is so extremely unreasonable, lol. Because why watch a show you know revolves around two members you hate seeing interact? At the same time though, them watching the show and being so angry at JM and JK and Jikookers tells me they really do understand where plenty of Jikookers are coming from.

Not shipping Jikook is fine. Disliking the idea that Jikook are together is fine, but it doesn’t make them any less questionable, and I think people who are watching the show are realizing that more and more.

Jimin and Jungkook went from being attached at the hip during the duration of the group being active. When they paused to enlist, JM and JK, in their own words, drifted. Again in their own words, JM and JK realized they weren’t seeing each other often and decided to rectify that by blocking out a long weekend to go on vacation with just the two of them, and chose to document it. Upon having fun, they decided to extend their filming and vacation in more places, again, just the two of them. Once the show was complete, JM and JK did not then go back their separate ways. They enlisted in the military as a collective unit. A choice they made prior to their vacationing being done.

The entire existence of AYS is honestly just a reminder of how much the two of them value their relationship, whatever it may be. Episodes 1, 2, and 4 specifically. They show how much they enjoy being in each other's space, and how much they click with one another, even though they have close and loving relationships with the other members.

So seeing Tkkrs seemingly come to genuinely understand that, yet hate it, is quite a thing to witness. None of us know the status of JM and JK’s relationship, and we honesty don’t need to. But to watch Tkkrs realize it is fully not at all what they want it to be (as in, Jungkook hates Jimin and Tae is the person he prefers to be with) is something to behold. Because no matter how angry they get, what new scenarios they create, or how much they ignore, the reality is what it is.

Jimin and Jungkook want to be around each other, and they enjoy being around each other. They make each other laugh and smile, and people who watch them together in their actual lives, all agree that they click. I would say I hope Tkkrs come around someday, but I think it’s too late. They’ve made up their minds and will never see the joy JM and JK bring each other, because they’ve built an entirely different world in their heads about what’s going on

[sarcasticbambi]

Enchanted Chapter I

Next>

“Why did I agree to come again?”

Was the thought running through the heads of two people, neither knowing how the night would end for them.

“I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you in one of these events, miss…”

“MDC, Monsieur. You can refer to me as MDC”

“Right… MDC you say…”

“...”

“So, what brings you to the Wayne Gala this year? Oh,I hope you understand the curiosity, it is the first time you’re participating in the event after all.”

Just because you make it sound polite, it doesn’t mean you’re actually being polite you-

To say Marinette was done with the fake and pretentious high-class pigs was the understatement of the century. 

Just because you have enough money to be invited here doesn’t mean you’re all that. It just means that M. Wayne will have more money to donate to the associations that will actually use it for something productive.

But then again, she too was invited so it’s not like she can say much. However, she never covered her words with honey to insult someone.

“I’m here as M. Stone’s plus one” “Wasn’t M. Stone’s plus one his manager Ms. Rolling?”

“No! Haven’t you heard? This year he invited his  designer!” 

Here comes the gossip…

“You mean the very exclusive designer known for working with Clara Nightingale and being the only one capable of keeping up with his extravagant personality?”

“I hear they keep themselves anonymous and so never go to galas and such even though many high-profile personalities invite them everytime.”

“THAT designer?”

The way they all turned to look at her could only be described as a predator ready to launch on their prey.

The compliments were very appreciated, even if her confidence sometimes made her think otherwise. Honestly, if it were in any other situation she’d probably be a blushing and sputtering mess, but considering that it came from these old people with nothing to do but flaunt their money all day, well, lets just say that she felt no remorse in putting the mask of professionalism that often came with dealing with annoying press *cough*Alya*cough* as Ladybug. She just wasn’t sure if the red and gold mask was enough to cover the glare she was sure was on her face. It sure wasn’t enough to cover the deadly annoyed aura she emitted.

“Yes, I-”

“M! There you are! Dad and Penny are looking for you!”

“Oh, Luka! I’ll be right with you! I’m sorry ladies and gentlemen, it seems I’m needed somewhere else. Wouldn’t want to leave M. Stone waiting now would we?”

If Marinette saw the pale faces of the people remembering a certain disaster pertaining to the impatience of one Jagged Stone, neither her nor Luka mentioned anything. And so, the pair of best friends left the group of pretentious old people to their gossip and judging words covered with honey so thick it might as well give you cavities. “Is Uncle Jagged really calling for me?”

“No, but I had to intervene, you looked ready to murder those people with your glare alone!” Luka said with a chuckle. “Ugh! Stop laughing, it’s not funny! Why did I even agree to come again! This is exactly why I’ve rejected all of the invitations!!”

“Well, you know how dad can be…” another chuckle

“Don’t I?! He threatened to destroy one of the suits I made him! And not just any suit, but the one specifically  made to open the stage on his upcoming tour!”

“It can’t be that bad, I mean, you made them almost 100% Jagged proof so no accidents could happen right? Even if he tried I’m pretty sure it’d be very difficult to damage them beyond repair”

“Oh no, you don't understand. He threatened to have Fang “play” with the suit! I may have made them Jagged proof, but they’re hardly CROCODILE PROOF!!”

“... You don’t really believe he’d go that far,do you?”

“Oh dear Luka, I don’t need to believe, I know so. And you want to know how I know that? Because he actually had the audacity of sending a picture of the suit dangling in front of Fang and the little menace looking at it like the most delicious snack ever!!!”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.”

The silence that fell upon them was the comfortable kind, the one that wraps you like a warm blanket on a cold evening. Even though their relationship didn’t work, they didn’t let that get in the way of a very understanding friendship. Both parties know how to appreciate and lift each other up when needed, especially with the weight of the responsibilities held in their shoulders.

“I think I'm going to stay on the side for a bit. I'm pretty sure if I have to continue another one of these fake conversations, I'm going to say or do something I'll regret and maybe get Uncle Jagged in trouble.”

“It’s ok, after a couple months of following dad to these things I know how bad they can be. And by the way, you - more than anyone else really - should know that my dad doesn’t need you being honest with these people to get him in trouble. He gets himself in trouble all the time! Honestly, I can't say with 100% certainty that trouble isn’t somehow his middle name.” The snort that followed this comment was somehow covered well enough to look elegant, how he did it? She’s still trying to figure it out.

“Yeah, I’m well aware” a soft smile appears on Marinette’s face, memories of various chaotic fittings coming to mind when thinking of her honorary uncle. Sometimes she wonders how Jagged and Anarka managed to give birth to the most quiet (and shy, in Juleka’s case) kids she knows, considering their personalities! Kagami is the only exception to the rule since her quietness and composure comes from years of training and discipline.

“I have to go find dad, you know he needs someone to keep him in check and Penny is trying to get a night to herself. Are you sure you’ll be ok?”

“Yes, I'll be fine. Go find him and help Penny keep the few years that Jagged has yet to make her lose to stress” Marinette said with a giggle.

“Ok, but be safe. If you need anything just call and I’ll be right here.”

“I didn’t know I brought my mum with me.” She said with a roll of her eyes “Don’t worry, I’ll just stay on the side of the room, I’ll even text you if I decide to go and check if the gardens are as amazing as they claim.”

“Ok. I’ll see you in a bit then, you know dad wants to introduce you to his friend.”

“Oui, oui, now leave so I can people watch and judge if these macarons are good enough.”

After one last reluctant look at the petite girl he now considers a sister, Luka left to find his dad.

Marinette walks to the table holding the array of snacks and picks up a pink macaron, turning it side to side judging its appearance first and then taking a small bite. It’s not as good as the ones she bakes with her parents back home, but considering all she has eaten in the US in the past week, suffice to say that it was up to her standards. She would not mind having a second one.

Resting her back against the marble pillar at the corner of the room, she settles with people watching for the time being. Wandering bluebell eyes land on the group of kids on the other side of the room where they were playing with each other, before spotting the tall ginger gentleman in a crouch speaking with a little girl. At first she was suspicious, but judging by the little she can see of the interaction - the little girl giggling at something the man said - she relaxes a bit more, guessing it’s someone she knows or is acquainted with.

After people watching for a couple moments more, she gets bored and decides to indeed check the famous Martha Wayne Gardens, perhaps she’ll even get a strike of inspiration, who knows. Sending a message to Luka so he doesn’t worry,  she moves along to the exit, unaware of the little green eyes following her form.

-----------------------------

Roy Harper was definitely not listening to Jason Todd ever again. No matter what.

“It’ll be fun!” he said.

“I’ll be there with you the whole time!” he said.

“Lian will have fun!” he said-

Ok, that last one is true. She is enjoying herself and playing with kids her age outside of school. But still, WHY DID I AGREE TO COME TO ONE OF THESE THINGS? The suits are uncomfortable, the people are annoying, Jason is off somewhere (probably at the bar avoiding the dangling pieces of meat that can’t seem to understand the word ‘no’) the list goes on and on!

Turning around, Roy leaves to go check on the kids. He knows he doesn’t need to worry, the Waynes would obviously only get the best of the best, security included, so he knows his daughter is in good hands. But he still prefers it when he has eyes on his little girl, no need for unnecessary troubles…

And Jason can make fun of how she has him wrapped around her pinky all he wants, later.

Not like you can say much right, Uncle Jay Jay?

Going up to the little kids group, Lian spots him immediately and runs up to him, mischief clear in the same green eyes he sees everyday in the mirror.

“Hey baby. Everything good?”

“Of course daddy, I’m a big girl now! You don't need to go around worrying about me!” she exclaimed, puffing her little chest up and making herself seem taller to get her point across.

“I know princess. I’m sorry for doubting your capability of not getting yourself in trouble or not creating chaos”

“*le gasp* Daddy!” The grin that appeared on his face betrayed the look in his eyes. He would do anything to protect his little girl, mischievous or not. He’d do anything for her, hunt the whole world down for whatever she asked and from whoever had it, if only to be able to keep that smile on her little face everyday.

“I don’t get in trouble! Trouble is the one to always find me! What do you want me to do, ignore it? You yourself said that it was rude to ignore people..”

Oh Lord. She knew exactly what she was doing, and there was absolutely nothing he could do, so with a resigned sigh he looked up at his daughter again and cleans the little bit of cream from the pastry she was eating earlier.

“Was the cream puff so good that even your cheeks wanted a bite?”

“Yes! You should try some yourself!” The little giggle she released hid the glance she threw at the masked lady on the other side of the room.

“Let's go then.”

—----------------------------------------------

Glancing around, the gardens were indeed quite beautiful. It’s a pity that Martha Wayne passed away, because even though it’s been years since the accident and someone else is in charge of it, it’s very obvious that the foundation of the garden is still the same as it was some twenty years ago.

With the care she is sure the gardens receive everyday, she can see why they’re called the best gardens in Gotham after the Gotham Botanical Gardens. But that is only because it’s Ivy who’s taking care of them - it doesn’t matter how good you may be at caring for plants, no one can beat Poison Ivy’s ability of bringing them to the best of their potential. 

It’s not long after moving around the gardens that Marinette hears her name being shouted from the entrance of it. 

guess it’s time to go back to that insanity. It was good while it lasted

Getting up from the bench she found around one of the several fountains, she fixed her dress and moved back inside.

——————————————-

Seeing Lian try and “sneak” another cream puff from him, Roy decides that that’s enough. 

“Come on little troublemaker, enough cream puffs. Your daddy won’t be able to endure another sugar high session.”

Ladies and gentlemen and non-binary people, this single statement brings forth the most challenging battle Roy has ever fought - and if you know about his… nightly past time, you know that he’s had several and very complicated battles, some even had him on the brink of death!

I introduce you, ‘The Pout’, by Lian Harper!

Obviously, Roy can never say no to his precious little girl. Who would be able to after seeing ‘The Pout’. At this point, not even Jason can say he’s managed to achieve such a feat!

“Princess, baby, light of my life, don’t do this to me. Please!”

“But daddy, just one more!” ‘The Pout’ intensifies…

“You said that last time too…”

“I promise! I’ll even get away from the table! We can go outside to the gardens!” 

If Roy wasn’t so desperate to get his daughter away from the pastry and snacks table, he would have been able to identify the glint that appeared in his daughter’s eyes whenever she was up to no good. But alas, he was too busy.

“Ok honey, one last one and that’s that! You promised!”

“Yes, yes. Now let’s go into the gardens! I saw a fairy move there and I DEFINITELY need to meet her!”

“… a fairy?” The look of confusion on his face spoke volumes.

“YES! She was wearing a gold and red dress! And her hair was so pretty too! It shone in the light! I’m pretty sure only fairies’ hair shines like that!”

Thinking it was another one of Lian’s fairytail settings where he’s required to play along and help her uncover mysteries or save someone (*cough*princess Lian*cough*), Roy just sets her down, holds her hands and guides her to the closest balcony. It’s too cold outside for them to actually walk around the garden, but it’ll be fine to stay on the balcony where they can oversee them. Should be enough for whatever adventure Lian’s mind conjured this time. 

—--------------------------

“Daddy look! It’s the fairy!”

Looking out the balcony towards where Lian's small fingers pointed, Roy finally understood what she meant when she said she saw a fairy. 

There, standing in front of the fountain with a glass of what he can only assume to be the expensive champagne being handed around the party, stood the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid his eyes upon. Luscious strands of midnight hair fell down her back only to stop at the small curvature of her back. The strands were so dark it shone blue in the light of the full moon that for once was visible in the dark, gloomy and foggy sky of good old Gotham.

Her red dress fell down to the crisp grass he was sure Alfred kept at the exact same even height every single time. Whoever made the dress, knew for sure what they were doing, because it seemed to float even though he saw it drag through the grass  when she moved. Although there wasn't much he could make out from the distance he was observing her, he could still see the shine of the gold lining and details in the dress with the small movements she made. 

And wasn't that a blessing. Because when she moved, he was able to see a bit more of her features; the pale skin that seemed to glisten in the moonlight, and the blue orbs that shone as bright as the bluest of sapphires to have ever been found, looked in his direction, and he was sure that time stopped right then and there. 

Like some kind of spell, he was entranced by the beauty that stood feet away from him surrounded by the most beautiful of greenery, making her fit for the word his daughter had used to describe her: a fairy. A Garden Fairy. He should tell Alfred that he did such a good job at keeping the garden in shape, that it was blessed by the presence of the most ethereal of fairies.

After a couple seconds of eye contact, her attention was given to something else - probably someone calling her, from the way she seemed to react. And so, after another glance his way, the Garden Fairy (as he’s decided to call her until he finds out her name) turns fully towards the building and starts walking inside, finally vanishing under the big balcony he was standing in.

“Awww, she left Daddy!” his daughter spoke for the first time since getting into the balcony with him. Or he’s assuming it was the first time, since he was completely  entranced by the Garden Fairy and would probably not have heard any comment from his daughter. Which, by her mischievous smirk, was a very accurate assumption.

“She was very pretty wasn’t she? I told you she was! Did you see her hair? I told you it was amazing! I also want hair like hers!!”

“Yes, yes she was. And you were very right, she does have pretty hair. Maybe we should get back inside to get away from the cold and maybe find this Garden Fairy of yours to get some hair tips?”

“That’s a great idea! Let’s go!”

Picking up the 6 years old, Roy turns around to head into the salon, when his daughter gets his attention again. And the look in her eyes? It spelled trouble.

“But Daddy, I never called her Garden Fairy!”

Next>

[dootznbootz]

I saw your rant post about Odysseus x Zeus (or whatever else that is) and honestly I feel like epic fandom in general doesn't treat it to be that deep. You are of course allowed to have a negative reaction to it, but honestly there are so many people making "Odysseus adopts Astyanax AU" as well and treating it as a lighthearted thing when it was literally infanticide. People have fun in AU without thinking too much about the morality of it because it's all fiction. But certain fictional characters can also make us emotional because they are relatable or dear to us, but we can't expect all people to feel the same for fictional charas. I hope this helps you a bit and I have blocked the big artists that support this AU (nothing against them, I just don't wanna see it) so you can do the same for some peace.

Anon, this is genuinely really really sweet. 🥺 Thank you for your kindness. I appreciate it <3

ngl, it just felt nice to vent. I usually try to keep my "angry" takes private but it did feel nice to let it out :)

And I know I can't really "stop it" lol. And even if I'm not a fan of something, I NEVER wanna stop people from making art. I still think there's complexity in that, but in the blankest terms, Art should be of anything. (and definitely folks should not like, "witchhunt" the people who make this AU. that's not cool. Don't do that.)

And someone else in the replies kind of explained how it's mostly the kind of absurdity of the situation that like, "makes it humorous". Like a "pigs could fly" thing. I don't completely understand it but it kind of makes sense. (My neurodivergent, traumatized ass got all worked up lol)

I mean I'm already not the biggest fan of "Whump" and this whole AU felt like "Whump but we're laughing at and making fun of the Whumpee"

I mean as you mentioned with the whole "Astayanax lives AU", idk, while to me it feels... like it's removing the point of both HIS sad story AND Epic's "Just a Man" and it's impact on Odysseus. It STILL is like, a "fix-it AU". granted it's fucked that that poor baby isn't with his mother as he should be but it's still a "yay! Happy things!" sorta AU. It's removing the infantcide lol.

I mean even Epic with it removing Odysseus' SAs from the Goddesses. Still showing his discomfort and distress but he also doesn't need to go through it like in the actual Odyssey. Another "Fix-it" type of AU.

This whole thing was just... very funky for me. Odysseus is already called a manwhore because people do NOT see what is blatantly in the text. And it being treated as something funny just... yeah. ;~;

Helen kind of portrays it best but there's this feeling sometimes of even after what happened and you know it's not your fault, you still feel like some "whore". There's a lot of victimblaming in fandom AND irl.

And I've noticed there's this...common thing I've seen?? Where folks (especially men) who were victims of SA are often portrayed and/or talked about as though they are natually "promiscuous" and that's why what happened to them happened. I mean look at how often Helen is portrayed as a dumb bimbo who "fell in love" with Paris. >:( even if that may be the exact opposite of their feelings and/or wants.

I mean, there's Asterion from BG3 for example. I have not played the game yet (though I really really want tooo) but from the sounds of it, he was "owned" by someone else and you are there with him when he is finally free. And it sounds like he is kind of the most "vanilla" and/or least interested in sex canonically but there's still a lot of stuff that portrays him as very sexual and/or promiscuous.

Hypersexuality is a common coping mechanism/aftermath ofc, but that's a bit of a different conversation lol.

When the whole "Odysseus x Zeus AU" first happened, I was just kind of like "mmm, okay, no thank." but as it got bigger and bigger and with it kind of becoming more...Crude?? And with some of the language used it just really messed with me.

I don't ship Odysseus with anyone other than Penelope but even with folks who ship him with others, I've still thankfully never run into coercion and/or assault with those relationships. Honestly if it was just Zeus x Odysseus, I'd be like "oh dang, not for me" and then just move on but with it being to SAVE his friends? The same thing that happened before? yeh.... I still want a tag that I can block. lol

idk why I rambled so long but it felt nice. :) Again, thank you for your kindness, Dear Anon. <3 I appreciate it.

[modelbus]

Hello! Do you think you'd be interested in doing part 2 of the Tommy x male reader and the destiny duck thing? i found it so funny and think it def deserves a part 2

I'd love to! I apologize for vanishing for a few weeks and for how short this is, school has been hectic with AP exams. Check out the first part :)

Pairing: CC!Tommyinnit x Male!Reader

Childhood Friends to Lovers - Soulmate AU Part 2

After reuniting with Tommy, life only seems to keep going up. The two of you click in a way you've never had happen before, conversations flowing better than beer at a frat party. And this time, you had his number. He wouldn't be vanishing on you again.

You learn that he's actually some crazy popular streamer, which only pissed you off a little. Seriously, you could've done one internet search and found him! But no, you had to spend forever wondering if you'd ever see him again.

Although tentative at first, you had become a little more comfortable walking in on his streams if you were in the area. It was rare, but it was amusing to see Twitter become chaos afterward. You certainly didn't give a shit he was a streamer though, simply enjoying Tommy for, well, Tommy. In all his stupidly funny and very chaotic glory.

Tommy had dragged you into a lot of bad ideas already. At the campground after the two of you met, you were both gone for so long that his parents called the cops! That was only the start, too. From spontaneously deciding it'd be fun to swim at night to convincing you to learn how to jet-ski with him, the two of you did everything together.

So, really, you shouldn't be so surprised when he asks you to do a stream with him, but you are. Streaming was certainly a big part of his life, and you'd put his streams on in the background to support him, but that was it. Yet here you are, sitting in a chair in his office, streaming with him.

His office was a cozy place, truly reflecting his personality. You liked it, a lot. The only downside was that you two couldn't cause too much chaos.

"How did I meet him?" Tommy reads off one of his monitors. It's open on the chat, messages rolling in to replace old ones.

"Shit." You laugh. "It all goes back to one fucking campground."

"Yeah, it kind of does. Huh, that's so weird!" Tommy grins, then leans back. "Answer them!"

"What?"

"Are you just going to leave poor chat waiting? Tell them how we met!"

Oh, that asshole.

"Fine." You sigh. "It was a dark and dreary day in December-"

"That's not what happened!" He yells.

You roll your eyes, moving your chair a little closer to his microphone and computer screens.

"We met when we were really young at a campsite, but then lost each other for a long time." You sum up. "We were too dumb as kids to think about having our parents meet each other, so I only had a picture of us to remember him by."

"But!" Tommy jumps in. "We both went to the campsite again and found each other!"

"I wouldn't say we found each other. More like... got chased into each other."

"I'm still convinced those geese-duck birds were sent by mastermind assassins! Like, what are the fucking odds?" Tommy pauses to read the chat for a moment. "Geese?" He reads. "Yeah! These two geese chased us until we literally ran into each other! I thought they were going to fucking kill us!"

"It hasn't happened again, or I'd think we were cursed." You joke.

The little story sends chat flying, and you look away so as to not get a headache. How Tommy did this so often you had no idea, but it was certainly admirable.

"Hang on, what the hell are destiny geese?" He asks. "Soulmate geese? Which is it? Here, you google it."

Tommy pushes his keyboard and mouse toward you, and you take them. Honestly, you aren't even sure which monitor and which tab you're typing in until the search is already complete and he's stolen the mouse back.

"Hey! I was using that!" You protest.

"You snooze you fucking lose. Oh, it's some type of legend! Wilbur would know what this is, his lame ass."

"Old, lame, and somehow still a fucking nerd."

If there is one thing you can hop on, it's bullying Wilbur. You had met him quickly, and according to him you were "perfect for Tommy." Although you and Tommy had spent the hour before that taunting him about Hamilton, so he was clearly biased.

"So what I'm reading is that soulmate geese just chase two soulmates into each other?" You ask, reading the article he had pulled up.

"So what, we're soulmates or some shit?" Tommy wrinkles his nose.

"Absolutely not, no way I'm soulmates with a bitch like you."

"Oi! Says you, dickhead!"

You feign hurt, shoving him to the side, only for him to shove you back.

"Fight me, right here, right now, pussyhead!" He yells, standing up.

Similarly standing up, you raise your fists in front of you instead of adopting the weird crouching position he had going on. You mime throwing a punch and he dramatically collapses to the ground.

"I've been hurt! I've been killed! Abuse! Abuse!"

"And that is why I'm better." You say to the stream.

[starlightkitten19butartsy]

Love your Kid Headcanons 😍❤️🙏

Can you do some about Killer too?

Sorry, I'm slower with writing than i am art. Hopefully you like it.

Funny enough tho at least i finished on killer's birthday.

‐------

Killer Head cannons:

- Killer is a himbo. He looks like he is calm and collected and though he does take care of things as kid is more outgoingly dumb, killer a bit dumb too. This man goes along with whatever Kid says, doesn’t matter if it is, dumb loyalty. (Still counts)

- Killer is quiet and because of his mask it is hard to tell what he really feels for you with expressions. Honestly for the longest time you might think he hates you or is indifferent to you.

- You'll have to pay attention to his actions, the little things he may do for you, how close he stands, how often he is near you or in the same room for no obvious reason.

- Do note that even if he likes you or if you ever did share feelings, Kid will always be top priority to him. He's been with him since the beginning and will be with him till the end.

 -If after a while you don't catch on he might be a little more bold. Casual touches here and there. Your shoulder or back as he passes, your hands when he gives or takes things from you. Compliments on things you do.

[-If kid likes someone he likes, killer would let kid have them. (Now there is the possibility of them most likely coming to a agreement of a poly relationship but that's a different post maybe)]

-It will take a long time for him to show you his face and even longer before he accidently laughs in front of you one day, before it was always his silent laugh where his shoulders shake. He will suddenly freeze and your reaction could make or break him.

-That’s the would reason he wears his mask in the first place, He hated his laugh so much that he covered his face to even hide his silent laughs. The first time he lets that laugh slip will be one of the times he is enjoying your company with his mask off. You do something so dumb/silly/ unexpected he lets it slip.  He will most likely cry if you react in an accepting way. He won't cry often but he will for this. (Kid will fully accept you after this too)

- His hobbies are cooking and drums. (<- cannon) HE will make you food or treats from time to time, He will also absolutely love it if you sit with him as he does.

- He likes to be physically affectionate with you. He is relatively quiet so he has to show his love somehow. He will hold your waist or hand frequently. Sometimes he will just pick you up and hold you in various ways, sitting in his arms, putting you on his shoulder, occasionally just wrapping his arms around you and holding you so your feet just dangle there.

- He will love if you walk up and wrap your arms around his waist or shoulders (if he is sitting). You will be able to make him blush by your sweet affection (Thank goodness for the mask) and will hide behind his bangs if he doesn't currently have it on.

-He has such nice hair that he will adore you taking care of each other's hair. He will share his secrets for how he keeps his hair amazing and brush your hair for you occasionally or wash it when you both shower. HE will melt if you give him the same, brushing his hair (Let’s be honest, it's tough with them muscular arms and how long it is.) When you snuggle and just run your hands through it, mindlessly playing with it, braiding it, he loves it all.

-He has a very calm anger and if upset. He is also a silent when pouting which he will do if you tease him since he can't beat you of all people up. (Normally anyone else would get beaten up or killed.)

- Also know that killer and kid share all sorts of stuff so just know he won’t give him details but kid will know all about you both. Heat and wire may too, since the 4 of them are all close, but kid is best friend so he will know more.

 

 During/ After WANO

- You both were most likely separated during everything that happened and for once more than thinking of kid he worried for you.

- When you finally reunite, he is terrified of your reaction to him. He is stuck with a weird smile and his laugh is constant now. He just like before will be concerned how you will react to him, will most likely tear up a bit when you accept him just like before. 

[system-of-a-feather]

The parent that turned my did into pdid is showing signs of dementia & is in denial. She failed her memory test at the doctors & it’s only getting worse. Its funny, I spent a lot of my childhood being ridiculed by her for symptoms of my DID & now she will likely have some of my formative experiences in her last days: not knowing where she is, confusing reality, etc etc. This is the kind of woman to laugh at panic attacks. my siblings are making themselves scarce before it gets worse.

It feels like poetic justice, but I see a train wreck waiting to happen. She’s POA for my other older relatives. My question to you is if you’d try to help this person if you were in my shoes. Part of me wants to do a family intervention. Part of me wants to watch her to crash & burn.

The irony is that if she had shown me that grace & empathy as a child, this wouldn’t even be a problem. But she set up this toxic dynamic in the family and so she feels the need to double down & pretend it’s not happening. And now it’s gonna bite her in the ass.

Would you stage an intervention now to head this off with senior planning or let the chips fall where they may?

Honestly? I don't really have a "I would do this" sort of response to this. Even putting aside how I don't really have the full picture, context, history, etc to navigate the nuance of the situation, I honestly just don't think this is really something where there is a clear answer and it's really one of those things that you have to kind of just come to the conclusion on what will sit right with you. Whatever path and direction you go, I honestly wouldn't blame you or judge you in anyways tbh.

Personally though, I generally default to neutral or slightly positive non-engagement. If there is a situation I'm torn on, have mixed feelings over, or find myself largely emotionally charge (especially if its simultaneously in opposing directions), I tend to default to respectfully doing the minimum necessary to keep issues from arising due to the lack of action (or sudden decrease in action) and typically continue whatever baseline I have been doing.

That tends to allow me to postpone any significant decision long enough for me to 1) sort out how I feel a little more clearly 2) see how things progress with me doing little to nothing different than what I'm currently doing and to see if that works for me and 3) removes a sense of time pressure and a sense of responsibility over others that is either not possible or not necessarily sustainable for me to take on

I understand the irony and schadenfreude of the situation, cause honestly, I do get how its kinda funny and there's a sense of karma at the whole situation. But in my experience, chasing that schadenfreude / sense of revenge often kind of kept me in a space of trauma and hurt and honestly kept me from exploring and experiencing opportunities in life that were better and/or possibly better spent elsewhere.

That isn't to say that you have to forgive, or that you have to care for her either. People tend to put revenge and forgiveness as a black and white binary, but honestly, you can not-forgive but also choose to not put yourself in a mental space centered on trauma and past hurt by also choosing to not seek revenge.

If you don't feel like she has earned / deserves care that she didn't give you, you aren't obliged to give it to her. It's not your responsibility and I wouldn't blame you if you took that approach. It's your right to go and live on your life apart from negative influences in your life and if she was and is currently a negative influence on your life, I don't think you are a bad person for just walking away from it.

But if that's the case, I'd also just check in with yourself and just make sure that - with the situation regarding the POA and all for other relatives - you are okay with the potential risks that might pose for any relatives you might like and make sure to weigh your care for those individuals against your lack of interest in helping address the situation.

If you do step in, make sure you know what and why you are choosing to step in and stage an intervention. Know what matters to you and what is at the core of your actions and just try to keep that in mind when you decide to step in as it can probably help in persisting when it might not feel like something you want to do.

At the end of the day, its one of those situations where you just kind of have to find where you draw the line and if you feel she deserves that act from you. Do what works best for you both now / in the present and with what you feel will genuinely make you feel the best in the long long run.

Either way, I've done and been on both sides of the coin with similar situations - particularly with my dad - and I honestly get both perspectives.

It's a non-answer, but I hope it helped you nonetheless.

[burning-fcols]

"Why do you like me? A lot of people don't. Well except fizz." baby blitz @ stolas - ✧ ˖ ˙ 「 @bliitzo 」 ˙ ˖ ✧

「 ☆ 」 Blinking with surprise at the abrupt question— and even more-so at the explanation that follows ( even if he had somewhat witnessed it during Blitzo's show, it's still difficult to believe people aren't fond of the delightful Impling ) —Stolas prepares to respond, but is cut-off by balls falling atop his head in rapid succession. In the midst of a juggling lesson, he's discovered a crucial aspect of the craft. Do not get distracted. Rubbing his head with a muttered ❛ ouch ❜ , he spares a moment to marvel at how clowns such as Blitzo can manage to perform while in the midst of other things. He truly is a talented individual.

Reaching down to gather the colorful spheres, Stolas tries again free of interruption, ❝ Well, I like you for a lot of reasons... For one, you make me laugh. ❞ Since Blitzo told his first joke, he'd been an expert at tickling the Prince's funny bone. It's not often he's given opportunity for merriment. Although, Stolas had liked Blitzo before that. Since he laid eyes on the other boy, honestly. Even if he couldn't quite explain it... Not without delving into reasons from the fairy tales he adores. Full of concepts like love at first sight, destined soul mates, and other wonderfully romantic sentiments he knows better than to bring up. Not to BLITZO anyway.

Stolas may have mentioned his fanciful pondering to Stella, much to his friend's annoyance. But he could hardly help himself! They both know their future marriage is a matter of circumstance, so it's not as though he's at risk of genuinely hurting her. Not when something this exciting was happening. Although Stolas is smart enough to know it can't last. He never did care for tragic love stories. An opinion he holds even stronger now that he's part of one... One-sided as it must be.

❝ You're also very brave... and bold and you have wonderful aspirations. When you talk about your goals— this grand life you've imagined for yourself, I can't help but believe in them. In you. ❞ Arms laden with balls, a few tumble from his grip when the owlet stands up straight. Cheeks dust pink as he flashes a sheepish smile, ❝ I enjoy spending time with you and you seem to feel the same. Most people, heh... don't seek out my company. ❞ Fidgeting in place, he awkwardly averts his gaze.

Probably shouldn't mention that Blitzo is cute too.

❝ Um... Would you like me to keep going or—? ❞ He tentatively asks. 「 ☆ 」

[toastess-with-the-mostess]

Let's Rewind! Toast watches Voltron: Defender of The Universe (1984)

Season 1, Episode 43: Voltron Frees the Slaves Season 1, Episode 44: Voltron vs. Voltron

Episode 43: Voltron Frees the Slaves Do I recognize this episode name? I think so

Allura - tries to be positive, Hunk - immediately pessimistic Like I fully agree with hunk here don't get me wrong but cmon man enjoy the peace for a bit like Keith said

"Lotor you are my son, may I be forgiven, and some day you will be king, may the evil gods help the planet. I have a special assignment to see if you could prove worthy of the throne" LMAO ZARKON ISN'T EVEN HIDING HIS DISDAIN FOR HIS OWN SON ANYMORE, I LOVE HIM FOR THAT

Idk why zarkon keeps trusting Lotor with destroying Voltron, like dude do you not remember the last 42 episodes lmao

oh I don't recognize this episode, was I wrong? I kind of know the looks of these characters, weird also a girl died in front of her lover by missile strike and ofc that was censored, but it was a funny one because we get no context as to why the guy just starts sobbing

Have other planets been named after Zarkon after being taken over? Why is this one just now being called Zarkonia

DID HAGGARS CAT JUST PUSH A GUY OFF A CLIFF?? WILD

is Voltron a universe wide legend then? I know that's probably obvious by now, but it's still wild to hear, and believable honestly since our cultures share the same stories in the same ways

well these kids are stupid if they think they can take lotor hostage, like itll probably work because its dotu and everything goes in their favor but still

I definitely recognize this episode now, I just don't know the plot like I thought I did

"this is a man's work!" kill die maim I know that was them trying to be brave and then setting up the only girl there to fight them on it to help to show she's strong but ugh

aand immediately the plan gets fucked because haggar's cat spies on them, if one of those kids doesn't die ill be disappointed

even better they're used as hostages, though that's gonna go south for lotor real fast

im sorry no launch sequence for the team? i guess they were saving money this episode at least the team knows it's a trap and is prepared for it

animation error, the little girl's dress is the same blue as her brother's, but it goes back to an off-white when it zooms out

"That mighty robot will be desTROYED" Lotor has no patience for kids confirmed

"Voltron doesn't know the gravity of the situation, but I do!" Lotor stop using good puns to trick people into thinking actually funny, you may be a clown, but you sure aren't the kind that makes people laugh

DID THEY NUKE THE KIDS WHEN THE TEAM CAME BY? THAT IS SUCH A WILD TURN FROM "CHANGING GRAVITY TO SLOW DOWN VOLTRON FOR THE ROBEAST TO GET HIM" they're all alive though fucking somehow because everyone merged into this weird orb thing

nobody remembers a goddamn thing about how it happened

WHY IS PIDGE SUDDENLY THE SMART GUY NOW, WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE HAS A SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATION BRING ME BACK FERAL REGULAR SMART PIDGE

sorry hold on, were the kids trapped on a whole different planet? This is why we need context good god now that they're saved the team is going to actually free the real planet

this robeast just looks like a regular mech again, what happened to the monster designs I liked those a lot

was that dodge a jojo reference

voltron has been automatically calibrating their weapon fire this whole time?? I feel like the team should be rusty after that because it's been a while since they became a team

does voltron have a retractable mace as a weapon, what the actual fuck why don't we see these cool weapons more often

oh a classic scene, one strike from each opponent where one gets hurt but one truly loses of course voltron wins because he pulled out blazing sword

the fight scenes this time around for voltron v robeast was actually pretty cool, I was more invested in it than I thought I'd be

these kids wanna be part of the vf huh? Inch resting ideas are coming to me the planet name is Bravura by the by

/episode end

Episode 44: Voltron vs Voltron Now this one I know FOR SURE

i love when episodes open with zarkon complaining, he's such a mood

Haggar's cat is just a full-time nark isn't he

"I provided a glamorous touch by darkening the circles under his eyes!" Haggar turned Voltron emo by giving him black eyeliner

Pidge I know fighting in a giant robot is cool, but I don't think it's good to WANT to fight lotor every time you visit a new planet the implications are implicating

honestly I totally forgot they came to planet Yadyl already, but it's nice to see SOME consistency in the show for once

why is it always children who recognize something is wrong, like I get that nobody would see that the robeast this time is a voltron dupe but why is it only the kid who's like "hmmm why does voltron have an escort with him??"

i think my gif this time around will be of the kid weirdly digging in the sand to leave voltron an early warning LMAO

I know the team is forming voltron to go to yadyl and properly celebrate with them, but it's still wild to see that voltron comes out even when there's no emergency

this other kid KNOWS it should be the governor who's answering the transmission from voltron, did he assume that someone else answered for him or is lotors impression of the guy just THAT good

team - sees people staring at voltron in fear keith: no people- HEY THERE'S AN ARMED ROBOT, THE SOS WAS RIGHT, EYE BEAM AND THEN HE PROCEEDS TO BLOW UP THE ENTIRE TOWN WHEN THERE LITERALLY WERE CIVILIANS how is the team not getting more bad will from some other planets like how hard is it to have a planet go rogue on them for not thinking their actions through

lotor why are you running INTO THE EXPLODING TURRETS I'm on zarkon's side here, you should be dead dude

animation error, dupetrons leg went from blue to yellow after sand blew on it but then went back to blue in the next cut

the chest on dupetron just turned into the drule skull symbol, haggar really did make him goth LMAO

oh man this thing really is getting to voltron, we haven't seen the blazing sword formation get interrupted before

Keith how did you know the signals were getting picked up, i can't just feed into the belief that this man is some tactical genius without some SUBSTANCE

its just some dude in dupetron,, also which they'd say that beforehand so i wouldnt assume it's a robeast and when it's really an overly complicated mech

WHY DO THEY KEEP SAYING RED LION IS HUNK, LANCE PILOTS RED LION ASSHOLES KNOW YOUR GODDAMN BASICS MY GOODNESS also who knew that voltron could detach his arms and then the arms can act as their own units WHILE STILL BEING ABLE TO FORM BLAZING SWORD, insanity

i changed my mind i know what i want to be the cover gif for this episode sidnvois

/episode end

[01turnkill]

2024 Media Post Time - Master

1. Total Drama Island (2023) and Total Drama Island (2024)

I would personally consider Total Drama as one of my first "fandoms". One of the first times I went into the online community and talked to people... I had a DeviantART account which I made as an Ask Account for one of the characters.. Only answered about 2 asks before I stopped. I made image collages on a website online and posted those too. All before I found out how to download art programs as a kid..

It's been a long time since I watched those but sometime 3 years ago I did actually rewatch the first Total Drama Island and Total Drama Action, but stopped at World Tour and definitely didn't touch Revenge of the Island or All-Stars.

This new season is very obviously taking inspiration from the original, going back to the classic style with the characters and the challenges. Chris is back, even! There are a lot of characters in Reboot that feel like pieces of TDI put together. Though, I mean this in a good way, they feel balanced and different but not too exaggerated. Realistic but exaggerated at the same time.

When the characters were introducted I thought Ripper had the funniest intro of all time honestly. In the rest of the show he was amusing but that fart episode man. I also found Zee hilarious almost every time he spoke and Wayne too. I just laugh.

The Reboot introduces Homosexuals for the first time which is pretty cool, I won't lie. I thought it was amusing the gay guy Bowie's whole personality is just being gay and also being a bit of a petty gossip girl antagonist, but then there's Raj who is not so explicitly gay- his personality is being a stupid hockey jock (but not too stupid). It was good but I feel like the season, while it does focus on the characters interpersonal relationships, doesn't have nearly enough down time or conversations between characters in their cabins or at breakfast.. Just during challenges.

After becoming a hockey fan this hit harder and funnier to me than it could have before. Plenty of hockey references and jokes. They have the character Wayne who is a hockey jock but also stupid and since Raj is the gay one, Wayne is just really stupid and that's all he has got going on. I thought he'd maybe put his physical strength to use or something but no. He does get battered and bruised every other episode though..

I think I and a lot of people really did not enjoy Emma and Chase. Chase in the 2nd season was really funny but he wasn't there long and the whole rest of his and Emma's time on the show was a little irritating. Funny at first but as it went on ... man. I don't really care much for the romance elements in the show. Even the gays though I did appreciate it and this was kind of cool like, I think I would have been more on board if Emma stayed sadistic whether or not she liked or hated Chase at the moment and didn't keep flip flopping but I don't know what kind of a message that sends haha.

There was also a farting episode and a massive vomit scene with coloured vomit and it's like... hey now. You are gonna give people fetishes so deep in their head it won't crawl out until they're 20 and it's going to be vicious.

Could say more but yeah I love stupid shows like this every so often. I am good at laughing at everything, especially kids shows. I know how to be shocked every time something odd happens even though this is a cartoon and enjoying the same joke ten times.

Edit adding:

Wayne mentioning his Sidney Crosby rookie card gets destroyed story. Me shedding a tear 'I actually know who Sidney Crosby is..' How it feels finally knowing who a celebrity is in a TV reference... Not to mention I'm a card nerd.

[clowncalvary]

Reading All of Garfield (Up Until This Point) The 1981 Post

So in a hilarious and delightful turn of events I have managed to circle back around to loving reading the Garfield comics again! I'm sure this won't develop into the ups and downs of binging Garfield or anything.

Anyway, read the Garfield Archive and join me!

I personally enjoy that Lyman was even an option for who ate Jon's sock. Is that something that he does often? I love that for the months that we do not see Lyman he is out here eating Jon's socks. Absolutely the worst roommate ever.

Look at that! The nap attack bit is back! We had this one last year and I did not enjoy is that much then either. But I'm trying to look at this with fresh eyes! Anywho, Garfield The Archivist.

OH GOD, IT'S HAPPENING, JON IS WEARING LYMAN'S SHIRT

Ooo, the linework has changed for this panel! It looks like from here on out Davis is using a different kind of pen!

I'm.... Do you usually put mayo on salads, Garfield?

Why living a boring life just to have a boring death? Enjoy your demise, Garfield~

That is just how an owner talks about their cat though, absolutely savage. Also this strip made me fuckin' gasp while laughing so it gets an A+ for that.

A literal reaction to some of these strips, I think I am in the flop era. Either that or I am just anticipating the mighty return of Lyman. I know he's out there somewhere!

I'm Sorry, Jon.

Okay, I take it back, no flop era, I love every comic with Nermal in it~

Now this is just god (Jim Davis) having a laugh at Garfield's expense! Also, I would hate mondays too if they involved having pianos dropped on me!

LYMAN IS BACK, WE LITERALLY HAD NOT SEEN HIM SINCE JAN, BUT HE IS HERE AGAIN JUST IN TIME FOR GARFIELD'S BIRTHDAY! Now back into the closet with him.

One of my felines would disagree! She loves the leash and harness because it means that she can go roll around in the dirt.

She used to date Lizzie Borden!? I'm not sure if this is an age joke, or honestly just a fun thought experiment.

Oh you just KNOW that, that cat food is going to taste terrible. Sorry, Garfield, you're too honest to act.

Honestly, me too, I can't keep a straight face through nasty food either.

So, first I had to look up what the heck an "apteryx" was; and then I had to look up why this comic would be funny. Shout out to this thread on reddit where someone was as puzzled as me.

I too would like to become a moose because my life has gotten too routine.

Love how ready he was for this bit, man positioned himself in front of that mirror and everything, he was ready to make sure she knew how pretty he is.

Jon really went and taught Garfield how to fetch, that is fucking adorable. Look how happy Garfield is about it too! This cat just needs to let himself enjoy life more often in a simple way!

In a different timeline this is where Jon died. I really should have been keeping track of how many times that happens.

Imagine putting a landmine in your cat's breakfast. I can't imagine that this was the kind of spice that Garfield was wanting with his breakfast.

WHY DOES HE LOOK SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS?! For everyone out there that does not have cats count yourself lucky that you have never had to deal with wet cat food. Bathing cannot save you from the smell of cat food in your hair.

After I finish reading all of these I have to check out a garfield family tree, poor Uncle Nick.

HOLD UP! 🫵

ENHANCE

ENHANCE

FREEZE FRAME! THERE ARE NO ANCHOVIES ON THAT PIZZA! THAT IS VERY CLEARLY A BURNT TO ALL HELL PEPPERONI!

I have beheld that struggle, most relatable Garfield comic to ever exist.

When I tell you my eyes got so wide. I want there to be a returning bit where Jon is forced to chase his own mice and gets one of these put on his chest in the night

A perfect place to end this year! On A Threat.

[silverbladexyz]

Hello :) Can you do a fem!reader x fyodor, nikolai, sigma and jouno (separately) where she unintentionally touch there (yk) no no square (they're in a relationship)

genre: crack, fluff, bit suggestive

Ofc, if you're comfortable with it .... Thank you (⁠灬⁠º⁠‿⁠º⁠灬⁠)⁠♡

Hello! Tbh this idea was kind of funny ngl, but hopefully I wrote it well! >.<

The images do not belong to me. They belong to their original owners.

TW: Suggestive, reader trips. And sorry that this was short ;-;

Fyodor, Nikolai, Sigma and Jouno when fem!reader accidentally touches 'there'

Fyodor:

-Fyodor probably won't show that much of an outward reaction honestly

-He knows that you weren't doing it on purpose, but it still is adorable to him to see you blush and immediately start apologising to him

-Internally though... his chest did feel a bit hot, but his ego is too big to admit that

-He makes you blush even more when he says ‘why are you apologising, hm? Wouldn’t it be normal now that we’re in a relationship? Fyodor yes I know you’re hot and all but like not everybody is as comfortable as you lol

-But Fyodor would warn you to be careful, since he might not be there to catch you whenever you fall. But it’s because he wants to be the only one who catches you lol

-Would tease you a bit for your reaction, but he will let you know that he wasn’t offended or anything. If you are a bit upset because of it, Fyodor would comfort you, but there’s no hard feelings

-Fyodor would cuddle you to make you feel better. He is still smirking a little when he sees your embarrassed form in his arms, but he doesn’t tease you that much. Fyodor understands how mortifying embarrassment was, so he’ll keep quiet as he gives you time to recover

-If you tease him saying that ‘I felt you get hot’, Fyodor would be smirking as he lifts your chin with his fingers to look you in your eyes with those deep amethyst pupils hot

-‘Oh? Then I take it that accident was intentional? I never knew that my dear needed me that much. How about I’ll grant your little wish, hm?’ And his smirk would widen when he sees you blush even more

-Don’t do it that often, but it would be funny if you did it sometimes. Bonus points if you catch him off guard, because his reaction will be priceless. He always gets back at you though

Nikolai:

-Okay, but in the first few milliseconds he will tense up and be slightly flustered, however, he will tease the hell out of you afterwards

-Nikolai would also laugh a lot, but he will let you hug him. He finds your red cheeks and embarrassed voice so cute that he can’t help but tease you about it

-’Nikolai.. stop’ you huffed as you buried your face into his chest. He let out a laugh, but he ruffled your hair playfully. ‘I’m sorry, but you’re so adorable that I can’t not tease you~’ Whack him.

-Tease him back though! His eyes will widen and he will stiffen up a bit, but prepare yourself for the onslaught of teasing that’s going to happen. Nikolai also isn’t really bothered by the incident, although it did catch him off guard

-If you keep doing it to him however... he might just do it back to you, but in another way. Nikolai is great at ‘innocent’ touches that actually are quite suggestive in their own manner. I hope you don’t get flustered easily, because he will be doing it quite often. But he’ll stop if you’re uncomfortable with it

-Nikolai always brings up that incident to tease you, because he loves seeing you flustered for him and only him

Sigma:

-I think he wouldn’t really realise at first; he’s more preoccupied with the fact that you had just tripped and would’ve fallen to the floor were it not for him catching you

-Sigma immediately asks if you were alright, while helping you stand up and checking you for any potential injuries. He breathes a sigh of relief when you say that you’re fine, but your red cheeks made him stop and ask you again

-Literally was not expecting the answer that he gets. Sigma blushes faintly, but he quickly gets rid of those feelings in his chest. He doesn’t want to make you feel more embarrassed, and so he comforts you with a ‘it’s alright Y/N, it was just an accident’

-Does not tease you for it because he hates making you feel embarrassed or bad. Will comfort you the best he can if you were feeling a bit upset and mortified because of it

-Sigma will never mention that incident again, however, it doesn’t mean that he hated it... ;) lmao sorry fjffjhjfjd

-He’s really sweet, and definitely won’t make a big deal about it. Hug him and hold him tight

Jouno:

-A personal favourite lmao

-Jouno probably wouldn’t register it that fast; he’ll catch you and make sure that you’re okay, not paying attention at first to the slight touch that he felt down there

-It’s when he feels you stiffen up and your heart rate quickening does he realise what had happened

-I feel like Jouno would be kind of confused on why you were embarrassed, because it wasn’t like you two were strangers or anything. He was your partner and weren’t things like this considered normal in relationships? (well excluding the whole tripping part)

-But he won’t be clueless for long. When he understands why you were embarrassed... he is going to smirk and tease you a lot

-He loves the sound of your heartbeat speeding up as he teases you. Jouno’s a sadist but we still love him anyways

-If you tease him back though... one thing may lead to another and I’ll leave it to your creative imaginations on what happened afterwards 🤭

I tried ;-;

@pixyys @nekokinax @pianotross @xxelfmamaxx @yuugen-benni

[ladyvlolypop]

Post-Merge Kai falling in love Hc's pt.2

Post-Merge Kai Parker falling in love with human reader(not part of the MF Gang)

I hope I didn't keep you waiting for too long guys, I kind of fell into a Draco Malfoy rabbit hole and now with the release of HOTD I was suddenly pulled into the GOT fandom??(I didn't watch either of these shows)

Since I have holidays now and I'm feeling inspired, I thought it be a great idea to finally finish this. I hope you enjoy

More Kai Parker Headcanons

(not my gif)

You'd prolly meet in the Mystic Grill

I can imagine him eyeing you from across the place and kind of already preparing himself to walk up to you

After a few minutes he'd walk over to you and just start chatting with you

With all his charm and wit he'd kind of pull you into staying and make you more interested

It surprised him that you didn't immediately walk away

You were surprised when approached by such a handsome man but also, kind of worried. Because Mystic Falls is no safe city with all the unsolved murders and the chilling rumors of creatures so horrifying that were a danger even in broad daylight. But soon after you talked with him a while you noticed that he wasn't any danger. Kai, that's his name. He talked non-stop but not without making you talk at least half as much. He was funny, charming and he seemed to be kind. Your soft look on your face didn't go unnoticed by Kai,. It was a look that intrigued him as much as he intrigued you. He loved to make you laugh and he loved listening to your voice. A much better voice than that of Damon or Bonnie. The conversation between you went so smooth that you were talking at least 1-2 hours without any awkward silences. Neither of you even dared to look at their phone in fear of killing the vibe. But once you caught a small look at your watch you gasped slightly and Kai immediately stopped talking mid sentence and looked at you worried. "What? What is it?" He followed your eyes curiously and looked at your watch. He reacted with much less shock. After all, he has no where to go. "Ah, nothing really it's just that I need to head home" you said a little quiet and looked outside and saw how dark it has gotten "I'm really sorry but I need to go now" You said and started packing your stuff. He watched you quietly, not sure what to do now.

Kai was a bit disappointed but immediately started panicking when he saw how quick you were on leaving

He went after you and decided to walk you home

He even got your number when dropping you off

He didn't leave that bad of an impression, so when he asked to meet up again after a few days you were excited to meet him again

With time you'd both meet up more and more and you'd form quite a good bond

He'd call you often when something reminded him of you or text you about literally anything that happened in his day

Of course he wanted to hear about your day too, but he had lots of stuff to talk about

You'd hang out whenever you both had time and honestly, it formed into a more friendship type of thing

He didn't mind because he was thrilled to have someone to talk to

He lowkey did want something more though

He unobtrusively checked whether you were a supernatural being or not and when he figured out you weren't he started wondering wether he was bringing you in danger

Especially when you told him that you didn't talk to the Salvatore Brothers and the people they were friends with

At least it eased his mind that they wouldn't try to talk you out of being friends with him

He did start worrying a lot though again and would get you to let him sleepovers since "His dad was strict and he never had one as a child so he wants to catch up to that"

He doesn't talk about his past a lot

But he did mention something about an abusive household and fake friends that are trying to ruin his life

Anyways, he started sleeping over often and you'd often wake up to him making breakfast

You'd spent all day and when he felt like you were working too much he'd start play fights and taking the things you need and hold them above his head so you wouldn't get them

(He secretly really liked having you touch him and be close to him like that, even if it was only platonic)

He craved that touch, that attention

Your touch

Your attention

He started craving things like that

And he'd kind of always hang out with you

And even if you were busy, he'd lurk around, making sure you're safe

Soon he started feeling weird when seeing you

And let's not forget the raging jealousy that had developed when he saw you flirting with another man

You noticed his eyes and it started worrying you

Have you angered him?

He also started spoiling you with gifts

Things you've told him you wanted

and he started paying for food or drinks

All in hopes of you suddenly falling into his arms like in all the books and movies he's read and seen

He did notice his feelings for you and was contemplaited whether he should confess his feelings

But he was deathly afraid of ruining the friendship

He even asked Elena

And Elena told him the obvious(even when she hated his guts) to confess

After a few weeks of him hanging out with you less and worrying you sick

He went to your place at almost 1 in the morning and confessed right at your doorstep

A decision that could only be made hot headed and past 11 pm

When you didn't immediately answer to his confession(you were half awake) his body was flooded by a wave of anger and panic

You were woken up by your door ringing aggressively and you groaned frustrated. You sighed loudly and slowly got up. you yelled "I'm coming already!! Stop assaulting my doorbell!" and the ringing stopped almost immediately, making you wonder if the neighbors kid were playing a trick on you. You rubbed your eyes and opened the door and sighed a little when you saw Kai standing there. He was standing a little more slouched than usual and he seemed tired as well, but not the normal tired, the exhausted and ill tired. "You-" You wanted to say something but he gripped your arms and said "ListenIhadtotellyouthissincethebeginningbutIdidn'tandwhatIreallywantedtosayisthatI'mdeeplyinlovewithyou".

... "I'm deeply in love with you" ... did he really say that?

"What?" you said. Kai looked at you scared. Did she catch what I said? I can't say it again. He let go of you and swallowed thickly. Did I do the right thing? Oh god she must hate me now. Your tired and confused look started looking like a look of disgust and deep hatred to him. He took a few steps back, suddenly feeling like 7 y/o Malachai again, watching his father look at him like the monster he is. He engraved your face in his brain, so that he could at least remember his first crush when he started over somewhere else.

Suddenly you were wide awake, you noticed him straighten up and his panicked face. He looked so pale it almost made you think he might be sick. But you caught on to his posture. He's about to run away. He wants to run away! He took his first step into the other direction wanting to go into a full sprint but you reached out for his arm and pulling him back hard. Kissing him softly and surprising him greatly.

Hope you guys like it I'll make another part with witch reader that's part w the mystic falls gang

taglist:

@huskyhunny

[erodasfishtacos]

Crackin’ the Code

prompt: Harry and YN tie the knot in a beautiful castle off the coat of Italy. Harry reflects back on his life before his love. YN has past insecurities creep on on her before the wedding. 

note: this is the necklace that YN receives as (one) her wedding gifts from H and she wears it during the ceremony.

word count: 9k

warnings: smut

***<-- click for visuals throughout (super important for this one shot!)

if you enjoy this fic (which i worked REALLY hard on) please reblog, like, comment, and come talk to me!

please please considering donating to my kofi since all my work is FREE to you guys!

---

The world expected an extravagant wedding with week-long festivities, celebrations in destinations only the richest could afford, and all the big names of the business world who ran in his circle.

The media outlets were just waiting, quite impatiently, for the day that the richest man in Europe settled down with a significant other. They would have news stories for decades when it came to the couple.

Of course, Harry Styles was going to marry a household name - the public thought. 

Whether it be an heiress, a model, maybe even an actress? The choices for the most eligible bachelor were limitless.

Any time he was at an event, usually a charity gala or black-tie dinner, paparazzi would take candid pictures of him with any female and then the following day publish an article about how they were a couple.

However, what the world didn’t know was that he’s been in a relationship for a year and a half, has already been engaged after the eight month mark, and moved into pretty soon after but that was hushed.

Nearly no one except a few key employees and family members knew about the couple. Everyone in his office building in the heart of London had to sign NDA’s at the beginning of their job - though almost all of them didn’t know she existed.

Harry did not put any limits on YN for the wedding planning. 

No price, no expectations, nothing. If she wanted ten-thousand people or zero people in attendance that was her call. If she wanted to drop ten million dollars on a wedding or a hundred that was fine too.

The CEO never fantasized about a wedding. 

Well he had but no in the terms most do. He didn’t sit and imagine the venue, the food menu, or the decorations. 

No, he didn’t care about any of that, he daydreamed about the fact that he and someone would commit themselves to each other for the rest of their lives.

Harry wanted to marry his fiance after their first date.

He was usually a very patient man, couldn’t have gotten where he was if he wasn’t. When it came to this, each day he wasn’t married to the love of his life felt like torture.

Since he proposed to her in his briefs in their bedroom, he had imagined her looking immaculate in whatever she chose to wear, exchanging vows of devotion, and then being tied together for life.

He never thought he would get here. He’d never felt a connection with someone like he had with the feisty waitress who bumped into him. Begin to believe that he was broken or lacking emotion because no matter how sweet the girl was he couldn’t see himself with the person.

Don’t get him wrong. 

He took many women out on dates that were downright awful. Asking him about money, suggesting he take them on expensive vacations or buy them a designer item, being too forward and palming his crotch in the middle of dinner.

One of the last dates he went on before he gave up was the one that made him stop looking all together, about six months before he ran in YN.

---

It was an expensive restaurant in the heart of London. It had a waitlist for months but one call and they could magically make an available booth for the billionaire within the hour. 

The girl he was sitting across from was a so-to-speak blind date. 

A set up by one of his business partners who stated that they would be a good match. Harry had rolled his eyes at that but couldn’t come up with an excuse fast enough to say ‘no.’

Her name was Aria, she had a respectable job at a local law firm as an assistant to a very well-known lawyer in the area. 

She was beautiful in the way of looking just like an instagram model with long dark extensions, false eyelashes that made it hard to determine what color her eyes were, and an outfit that made Harry a bit embarrassed to be seen with her - short and low cut at a five-star restaurant.

“Yeah, I just got back from Mallorca with a group of friends,” She tells him, flipping through the photo album on her phone to show him pictures. 

When she ‘accidentally’ swipes (and slowly swipes) again so that Harry definitely gets a glimpse of a nude selfie.

Harry internally groans, couldn’t be less turned on by that, and doesn’t acknowledge it - much to Aria's disappointment. 

She was fishing for a compliment, maybe a request for him to take the phone and look closer at the picture like most men would.

Instead he sits back, takes a sip of his wine, and nods curtly, “It looks like you had a good time.”

She stumbles for a second, confused by his sudden standoffishness, and clicks her phone locked before putting it next to her on the table, “Did I offend you?”

He was already done with the date, with the dating scene, with fucking everything honestly. 

What a goddamn waste of a night.

Harry barks out a cruel laugh, “It takes a lot more to offend me than a picture of y’tits but it’s a bit offensive that y’think so little of yourself that you think that’s how y’going to impress me. Those tits didn’t impress me much, darling.”

Aria’s eyes narrow in blatant disbelief at how much of an asshole he was being. 

Granted, she did feel a bit of embarrassment creeping up in her stomach about thinking showing him that picture was a good idea but still, he didn’t need to react like that.

“It really makes sense why you don’t have a girlfriend, it’s because of what an asshole you are,” The girl sneers with venom as she tucks her phone into her clutch, swigging down the last drops of the expensive wine.

He shrugs like he’s unbothered, a nasty feeling quilling in the pit of his stomach as he keeps an outward expression of nonchalance and ease, it make the raven-haired woman even more furious as he replies cooly, “I’m not being an asshole, honesty hurts sometimes. Maybe if you think the way you attract someone is by nude pictures, you should try Tinder or Bumble.”

“I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have,” Aria tells him before pushing out her chair and leaving before the main course even arrives. 

Harry sits there for a moment, swallowing and pleading with himself to not let the nasty words set in because they felt too real and too personal - she had actually struck some type of chord within and it had his stomach churning.

When he pays the bill, apologizing profusely for leaving dinner before the entree arrives but with an excuse of a company emergency - it’s eerily quiet in his car as he drives home to his massive home with no one in it.

It doesn’t happen often. 

He should call his mum, Gemma, Dorothy even to talk it out but he feels so fucking alone because he can’t get it right. He can’t connect with anyone and it is starting to feel hopeless.

He is angry, so angry at himself, that he can’t shake the feeling of it and he feels like he’s losing control because he never fucking talks about his emotions.

A beautiful set of dishware was sitting out his dining room table, the housekeeper had carefully unwrapped them earlier in the day. 

They were imported from Beijing, decorated with real gold, and handcrafted. It had cost him nearly forty-thousand dollars for a set of fucking plates and bowls.

I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have.

It is repeatedly on a loop in his head, glares at the items on the dinner table like they’re mocking him, and he has no wits about himself before he’s taking one of the beautiful bowls and throwing it against the wall as hard as possible.

I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have.

By the time he’s done, his chest is heaving, and his face is red. 

When reality starts to set back in, every single item from the set is destroyed on the floor, the wall’s paint chipped from where he’d hurled them.

He was so fucked up.

-

Harry couldn’t help but relieve the feelings of that nasty flashback. He couldn’t believe that he had been at that point in his life - not when he had the most all-consuming, amazing in every single way woman laying next to him in his bed.

YN had shown Harry that he had never been broken, he had just been waiting. 

She was his soulmate and he had been waiting for her since forever. He truly believed that as he looked at the girl next to him with enough emotion his heart might burst.

She was just...everything.

YN was so fucking funny - the funniest person Harry had ever met. She was loving in a way that made you feel like you belonged. Compassionate in a way that makes you want to be more selfless yourself. Intelligent enough that it was breathtaking and unreal - and that was just the tip of the iceberg.

She was uncaring of who Harry was - in the most perfect way. 

Money wasn’t a personality trait that she defined him with. She loved him for who he was at the bare basics, stripped away from his public life.

She was confident in a way that girls rarely were. 

Bared face and more beautiful than the highest-paid models. 

Her body was her own, embracing every curve and inch of it without any shame. Let herself be authentic in front of Harry which made him feel like he had won a secret lottery.

Right now, she was fast asleep next to him in bed after stuffing herself full of oreos that she was dunking in milk. She ignored Harry’s looks of disgust at the soggy cookies and munched away happily which made him happy in turn.

She still had a dark crumb on the corner of her puffy lips, her mouth parted just the slightest amount, and her face smushed halfway into the pillow. 

The shirt she had on was so oversized she was swimming in it and a pair of soft pink cheeky underwear.

Currently, she was the farthest thing from graceful and Harry loved that so fucking much. 

As they lay mere days away from their wedding, remembering that nasty flashback, he can’t help but remember their first date and how he had known from them that he had finally found a spark, a connection to another human being.

--

Harry cannot remember the last time he had been nervous. 

Maybe back in his teenage years? If that. 

It was an unsettling feeling that was currently pooling in the pit of his stomach as he changed his outfit for the third time before finally being somewhat satisfied with the suit he had picked out - tighter black jeans, black button-up, black blazer - couldn’t go wrong there. ***

YN had texted him asking what she should wear for their first date when Harry told her he was going to keep it simple and take her to a restaurant.

He had to dress nice, it was an expensive restaurant that he had not taken any other dates to before, it was right outside of London - going towards the countryside with a beautiful view of a meadow and stream.

When he had arrived in front of her apartment, well he had never been on this side of town, and it quite frankly looked like the roof of her building was about to collapse at any minute. It was rough to say the least.

Harry had picked out a car he thought would impress her. He remembered her saying the doors of his Lamborghini were stupid so he picked a car with normal doors this time. It was his new Audi Quattro that had cost him upwards of 170,000 pounds. ***

YN had popped out of the front door, her face didn’t read impressed when she saw the car like he had hoped. It was interesting before YN, he did not care whether or not his dates were impressed by him - now he craved it.

She looked extraordinary in a form fitting silky black dress that hugged every single curve of her body perfectly while accentuating them at the same time. Minimal makeup, loose waves, and simple high heels - it was like a dream that he was taking this girl out on a date. ***

When she slips into the passenger seat, the smell of her floral yet cinnamon perfume makes the car smell heavenly, she looks over at him and says, “You didn’t even come open the door for me. We’re off to a bad start, Harry.”

His heart sinks, fuck - he had been blindsided by her beauty that he wasn’t even being a proper gentleman, “M’so sorry, I wa-”

She chirps out a tender laugh, patting his arm, “You’re face, oh my god. I was just fucking with you.”

Harry’s frown turns into a pout, “S’not nice, pet.”

YN shrugs before a bit self-consciously adjusting the fabric around her midsection, “Erm, I hope this outfit is nice enough? It’s really the only semi-decent thing I own.”

He shakes his head in disbelief, “Y’look absolutely stunning. I can’t even believe y’real to be honest, so fuckin’ pretty.”

YN gives him a shy, unsure smile but he can tell she’s preening at the compliment internally (which she totally is).

The restaurant is one of the nicest in England, let alone London. 

There wasn’t even a menu, they just served eight courses over a few hours time by servers in suits with bowties on. 

YN had never felt more out of place.

As they sat down, Harry was proud that he was able to show off his abilities for a good date, YN was looking around nervously before looking up at the server and saying, “We didn’t get menus yet.”

The man gives her a humorous expression before telling her, “We don’t do menus here, miss. Your date is a regular, I am sure he can fill you in. However, we are starting off with a Cabernet from 2001 imported from Napa, California.”

As he pours the wine into their sparkling glasses, she asks unknowingly, “I don’t really like wine. Is there any way I could get a Coke?”

Harry frowns when the server laughs meanly at her, “Ma’am this isn’t McDonald’s. We do not carry soda. I can provide you with water, if you so wish.”

Harry can’t help but snap at the waiter, “Oi, she’s never been here before. Lay off with the attitude alright?”

“My apologies, Mr. Styles,” He murmurs obediently before finishing the pouring off the whine and retreating from the table.

YN is trying to hide how uncomfortable she is but it is still obvious with how she fidgets in her seat, doesn’t quite know what to do with her hands as she doesn’t even bother to reach towards the wine glass.

“This isn’t really your scene, is it?” Harry murmurs, embarrassment with his failure to impress her with an expensive car and dinner. 

It was falling flat and it was the only thing he knew how to do - flaunt his wealth, everyone else had always been impressed.

“No, it isn’t,” She agrees quietly, fingers folding the edges of the cloth napkin to keep her anxiousness directed somewhere, “I appreciate this, er, dinner. I thought we were going to go somewhere like Mary’s.”

Mary’s was a restaurant that was considered ‘nice’ to the commoners in the city. It was a bit more expensive than a pub and the attire was a bit fancier than if you were going out to a bar. 

For someone like Harry, that was not considered a fancy restaurant. 

However, YN was not him and this was not something that she had ever been accustomed to. He now definitely felt like an idiot.

It’s made even worse when a massive plate is put in front of each of them. 

The plate is huge but the dish is merely one scallop with a lemon sauce and sprinkle of parsley on top. YN can’t even try to hide her confusion at the food.

 “I’ve mucked this date up,” Harry sighs, nearly thirty minutes into the actual date. 

YN had taken a small bite of the scallop before setting down her fork and not touching it again - it tasted like dirty feet. Did rich people like that taste?

She decides not to answer directly, “I already know you have money. It doesn’t ‘wow’ me. I was hoping for a fun date, this is….nice but quite truthfully, not for me. I prefer a pub or bowling - this feels more like a business meeting.”

Harry usually doesn’t have dates that are this honest with him. 

He feels embarrassed but he really did appreciate her honesty. He should have known to do something different than this but he was comfortable with his normal pattern.

“Can we get out of here?” YN asks, placing the napkin back on the table and gathering up her small purse to swing over her shoulder.

He feels defeated as he nods, paying for the meal in full as he accepts that he’s fucked up the date beyond repair by being an arrogant, ignorant asshole who doesn’t truly know how to talk to a girl he likes.

It’s quiet as he starts the car and pulls back onto the road, he startles a bit when YN points to a glowing sign of a golden arch and demands, “Go there.”

With a bit of confusion, Harry pulls into the McDonald’s parking lot and then to the drive-thru as she motions for him to do so. 

God, he hasn’t been to a fast food joint in years now if he was being honest.

When they pull up to the screen, YN leans across and shoots out their food order with ease before sitting back with a smug smile, “We’re going to have a date my way.”

Harry sighs with relief when he realizes the date isn’t over - but really just beginning. They sit and chat in the parking lot. He is thoroughly impressed when YN manages a box of nuggets, a fry, and a milkshake without shame.

Not like she should be shameful - just usually on dates women were hesitant to actually eat and instead picked carefully at their food instead. Their conversation in the car is bright, at some points deep and meaningful, but refreshing. It made him feel young again.

After they finished eating, she’s ordering him to drive a bit further out into the country where he can’t help but make the joke, “Are y’taking me somewhere to kill me?” YN smiles happily with a wide grin, “You’ll just have to wait to see.”

It ends up being a lake. A beautiful body of water that was surrounded by trees that were being reflected into the ripples with the light of the moon. The only sounds were of crickets chirping and the light lapping of the water against the small shore. ***

“I used to come here a lot in the summer in high school,” YN murmurs as Harry takes in the scenery of everything. It had been so long since he had appreciated nature - not the bright clear waters in the tropics but something like this.

“S’beautiful,” Harry replies, can’t help but observe this girl he’s infatuated beauty in the moonlight. 

Her skin looks like it’s glowing, the moon sparkling off the twinkle of her iries, and she just looked...ethereal. Like she belonged in the beauty of the wilderness.

He couldn’t believe his eyes - had to blink harshly a few times to make sure he’s not imagining it when she pulls the thin straps of her dress down her shoulders and shimmy the garment down her body until she’s left in a delicate lace bra and cheeky pair of underwear.

Harry, always the gentleman, keeps his eyes (with effort) on her face. Unsure of what is going on in her mind before she turns around with a little run and dives headfirst into the deep waters before popping back up and giggling, “Jump in!”

She’s just so...carefree, adventurous. Harry hadn’t felt free in fucking years.

It has him shucking out of all of his clothing, just down to his tight black briefs before he’s diving in, right next to her, and feeling around. He wraps his hand around her ankle to teasingly tug her under with him before they both surface.

As they wad in the water, YN swims over to him, and wraps her legs around his waist, arms around his neck. Her soaking wet hair was dripping and he was breathing heavy, feeling his ribcage expand against her soft tummy.

She murmurs quietly over the light lapping over the water, “You haven’t even looked at me once.”

Harry swallows, feeling like a schoolboy again, “I...I didn’t want to without permission.”

“I want you to look at me,” YN replies, letting her nose nudge his and her eyes searching into his nervous ones. 

He nods, closing his eyes when he feels her lips brush his, letting his large palms grip at her sides and pull her closer to his chest. Their lips not breaking when his hands begin to explore the intricate, plush curves of her body.

They don’t do anything else, don’t go any further but he groaning when she traces her fingertips down his muscular, defined abs and thumb rubbing over the trail of light hair leading into his briefs.

After a swim, filled with splashing and dunking, they retired to lay in the grass. Both of their backs, looking up at the clear night sky, moon full and stars glittering against the stark darkness that surrounds it.

YN wriggle until she’s tucked into his side, hand running up and down his chest, as she says, “I’m sorry your date didn’t go as planned. I ruined it.”

“Y’didn’t ruin anything. I...I haven’t felt like this in a long time,” Harry admits as he gives off an embarrassed laugh, “I..I’m a little bit scared, to be honest.”

“Scared? Of what?” YN asks, lips pressing against a tattoo on his bare shoulder.

“Because I already am falling for you,” Harry utters, heart racing and his eyes glued upwards and pointedly not wanting to see her interaction.

“That’s a relief.”

His eyebrows shoot up, “A relief?”

“Yeah, I would say. I’m falling too,” YN whispers before leaning up to connect their lips once more as the moon rises further in the sky and the crickets sing a little louder. They lay like that for a very long time.

Harry went home that night for the first time not feeling the empty weight of his loneliness, instead he feel asleep imagining the beautiful, spontaneous girl next to him in his bed.

--

It wasn’t going to be the wedding everyone expected for The Harry Styles. **

There was not many invites set out for this event. It wasn’t the wedding of the century or the most expensive wedding of the decade.

Harry would have let his wife-to-be have this day however she wanted without complaint but could say he was very happy that it was going to a be a low-key event. It was going to be some of YN’s family, though she didn’t have much, and Harry’s extended family. No one from work or business. Just family.

They had just gotten finished with the rehearsal dinner, the couple being ordered to separate rooms for the final night before they were married. It was tradition. 

Harry had walked YN to her hotel room, they were staying at the venue, and pressed her up against the door. His hand coming to weave into her meticulously curled hair and cupping the back of her head, bring her mouth to his.

He wastes no time in letting his tongue find hers, hips coming to press her further back against the aged wood, and his teeth nipping roughly at her plump bottom lip, “Baby, y’gonna be m’wife tomorrow.”

YN’s eyes twinkle up at him like they did during their first date, “I can’t wait. I can’t wait to spend forever with you.”

His fiance laughs kindly as he gets a bit watery eyed, her thumb coming to swipe under his eye, she jokes, “Are you regretting proposing now?”

“Just never knew I could be this happy,” He murmurs against her lips, can’t help but reach around to grip a generous amount of her backside and pulling her flush against him where he’s hardening quickly.

“Mm, down boy. You don’t get the goods until tomorrow,” YN scolds, hand wrapping around his wrist and squeaking when he squeezes harder to get the point across - how much he wants her, all the fucking time.

“Want it now, pet,” Harry whines lowly, grinding his hips forward into her, “Give it t’me, y’mouth, y’cun-”

“Alright lovebirds! Separate now!” Gemma barks to interrupt with the laughter of their childhood friend Chloe.

They pull Harry by the back of the shirt and push him forward towards his room, Gemma smiles back at YN, “Make him put a ring on it before you give it to him!”

“Gem!” Harry scolds with a whine, giving his fiance puppy dog eyes and a pouted bottom lip, “Baby, don’t let them take me!”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, I love you!” YN shouts back, waving and smiling to herself as she opens up the door to her room and then locking it after she steps in. It feels weird being in a hotel room without him but she was a bit sweaty and her nerves were wiry so she decided a nice bath would be a good idea.

-

It’s past two in the morning and she was no less ready to find sleep. The worries of whether everything will be set up properly, if she’ll stutter during her vows, there were just so many things that could go wrong.

Life didn’t even seem real at this moment. 

She was marrying her husband at an amazing castle on the coast of italy with family to surround them in love. She had the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, the perfect partner. ***

She had never had it easy. Never thought she would deserve something like this. Harry had made her feel worthy of all this, they deserved to have a happy ever after. 

When it hits three in the morning, she can’t stand the quiet of the italian countryside anymore, and is swinging her legs over the bed. She pockets the keycard Harry gave her earlier in the day in her cotton shorts before sneaking out of her room.

After she taps the card to the sensor, the large oak doorknob clicks, she slips in and closes the door as silently as possible. YN steps in to the room, Harry's asleep in his bed on his stomach, face smushed into the pillow.

Harry’s facial expression and body language while he was awake was so severe, serious, intimidating. In sleep, his face was lax and his limbs loose. He looked more boyish when he was dreaming.

YN’s heart aches at how much she loves him, pulling the covers up, and crawling under them until she’s jostling him unintentionally, waking him from his light sleep with a mumble, “Baby, y’okay? Wha’s wrong? Y’alright?”

She giggles at his dazy panic, “I just missed you.”

“Mmm,” Harry agrees, pulling her all the way down and rolling on top of her, “Missed y’more.”

“You’re like a toaster!” YN squeals as he’s encompasses her, laying on her with his weight. His lips finding her pulse point and gently sucking. He was barely awake and he still couldn’t stop himself from her finding comfort in her body.

“I’m warmin’ y’up,” Harry growls against her neck before giving her a lick which has her giggling even more and pushing him off until he falls on his back and she’s swing her legs over his waist, straddling him.

“Y’breakin’ the tradition, m’heart.”

YN shrugs, humming while he palms at her belly, and she (much to his disappointment) ignores where he’s hard and waiting for her.

“I want t’sleep with you,” She pleas sheepishly, leaning all the way over to connect their lips in a quickie peck before she’s moving off of him and into his side.

“Never say no to you, y’know that, dovie,” Harry replies as if it’s obvious (it is).

“We’re getting married tomorrow,” YN whispers into the dark, like it’s a secret just between the two.

Harry nuzzles his nose against her temple, “Never wanted anythin’ more than I want you.”

YN can’t help but sniffle softly, overwhelmed with emotion and love, “You’re so good to me. I don’t deserve you.”

“You saved me. You saved me from myself, from where I was going. You gave me hope, feeling again. Y’are m’heart, it fuckin’ beats for you.”

It may not be tradition but YN wouldn’t of had it any other way, sleeping in a magnificent castle on the ethereal coast of Italy in a classic hotel room, and the excitement of their wedding rumbling in both of their stomachs.

--

“You sneaky bastards!” Bethany screeches, door flinging open with Gemma in tow as they intrude into Harry’s room - finding the couple curled up under the covers with Harry spooning YN with his face tucked into her hair.

“Fuck off,” Harry groans, pulling his fiance closer into his chest as she wriggles awake and whimpers lowly, “Mornin’ lovie.”

“Out out!” Gemma shoos, pulling the covers off of them and the sisters showing no mercy while they yank YN out of the bed and titter about how she needs to start getting ready, no time for cuddles, breaking traditions.

“Bring her back!” He whines childishly, hurling a pillow at his sister’s retreating back as they guide YN back to her own room.

“You’ll see her in a few hours!” Gemma shouts back before slamming the hotel room door and leaving Harry to doze off for just a few more minutes.

-

Hair and makeup went fast. 

It was getting closer and closer to actually walking down the aisle towards her soon-to-be life partner and she’s never felt more nervous.

Rosemary and Bethany were all rushing around - attempting to get ready in the midst of getting the bride ready.

YN didn’t want to look like a doll or have any intense makeup. It was a soft champagne smokey eye with dewy skin and a glowing highlight. A nice lip with a bit of glittering gloss.

Her hair was in big, loose curls that cascaded down her back with the front pulled off of her face. A real white flower holding it back.

Then it was the dress. She was anxious about whether Harry would like it or not. She wasn’t sure what he was expecting her to wear - a massive ball gown, a form-fitting mermaid, or something less over-the-top?

It was a show-stopper that had her memorized when she had first seen it - could automatically imagined herself getting married in Italy with this on her body.

It was also one of the only times she didn’t even care about the price tag - she knew this was it. Yes, it was absurd to spend fifty thousand pounds on a dress but it was the one time she took advantage of Harry’s wealth.

It was flowy, reminding her of the soft waves that lapped at the coast of the italian beaches. It was sophisticated, classy with a sharp starch white that billowed into a dreamlike beauty.

What had made her fall in love was the sheer, detailed sleeves that gave the dress more of a vintage, glamour appearance than the modern tight-fit, overly sexy gowns that most brides wore nowawadays. ***

The train was long and sleek. It would trail beautifully down the aisle before being bustled for the reception. It made her feel confident in a way that an item of clothing next had made her feel before.

“Your tits look amazing,” Bethany compliments before giggling when their grandmum pinches her arm for her crude language.

YN couldn’t find it in her to laugh. She felt like her voice was stuck in her throat and it wasn’t moving. 

It started to feel real.

The fact that Harry had proposed, had planned a wedding with her, that he was agreeing to marrying her today.

It was starting to scare her - no, not cold feet but anxiety that he would realize that he could do better than the lowly waitress.

Now, on a normal day, she wouldn’t be having these irrational thoughts. Today was different and it felt too good to be true.

Rosemary and Bethany sense the tension in the room, rub her shoulders, and respect her wishes when she asked for a moment alone.

YN debates picking up her phone, knowing he was busy with his bigger side of the family in the groom’s suite.

She finds herself picking up her mobile, dialing his number, and waiting with bated breath for his syrupy, warm voice to pour through the speaker.

“Everythin’ okay?” He answers, she can hear Anne and Gemma tittering about in the background, yelling at him to get a move on.

“I’m scared,” YN whispers, she holds back her tears because the last thing she wanted to do was ruin her meticulous makeup.

“Leavin’ me at the altar?” Harry jokes lowly, stepping away from prying ears.

YN giggles at his teasing tone, “Never. I…I feel like this is all too good to be true. Like it’s a dream and I’m going to wake up.”

Harry huffs, “Sweetheart. Y’my soulmate, if y’wake up - I’m right there with you, okay? God, if anyone is dreamin’ it’s me. I get t’marry the most beautiful, intelligent -“

Gemma’s voice interrupts him, “You already seduced her into marrying you! We don’t have time for this sweet talk!”

The line goes dead but YN feels much better now.

—

Rosemary was going to be the one walking her down the aisle to her new husband. It didn’t feel right to have anyone else do it as she was the one who raised her into the strong, independent woman she was today.

YN knew she wanted to have an outside wedding. 

What would be more perfect than a cool evening in Italy? It was what she had dreamed about since she was little without the idea that it would ever happen.

The weather was absolutely perfect. There was a slight warm breeze that would keep the guests from being overheated, the sun was peeking in and out of vibrant white clouds that complimented the blue sky.

She knew exactly where Harry would be standing. 

Underneath a beautiful, dated archway with intricate designs about. 

The old material had lovingly grown luscious ivy that kissed the walls in a swirling, natural design. 

YN would never forget how beautiful that ivy had looked on her wedding day, encompassing the magnificent that was her soon-to-be husband.***

The venue was open, airy but still gave off an intimacy. There weren't many rows of chairs because not many were invited to share in such an ethereal experience where soulmates have found each other and were announcing their commitment to the world.

“Are you ready, my daughter?” Her grandmother had asked quietly as they lined up behind the expansive, old brick wall that hides them from the rest of the ceremony and crowd. She could hear the whispering as people took their seats.

YN nods, her vocal cords refusing to cooperate as she imagines Harry just as nervous on the opposite side with his family. 

When the twinkling, traditional music begins from the small orchestra off to the side - the realization hits her - it is actually happening, right now.

Bethany puts her bouquet in front of her, giving one last meaningful smile at her sister before she takes her cue to turn the corner and begins her walk down the aisle. 

It meant Harry was up there, watching as she was about to appear.

Then the orchestra’s melody became louder, more grand in the signaling for the guests to stand and turned toward the back of the room - awaiting the bride’s entrance to the ceremony. 

Rosemary takes the initiative to hook their arms and guide her past the wall.

YN clutches onto her own flowers as if it’s her lifeline. ***

Every fear, insecurity, moment of self-doubt dissipates when her eyes connect to Harry’s. There is no longer a doubt in her mind that she wasn’t enough. It was a deep, unbreakable stare as Harry’s mouth parts in a gasp of awe.

He was in a suit that was undeniably him. It displayed how fucking regal he was, how it looked like he was handcrafted into the italian design, how it fit him just perfectly.

It wasn’t a normal tuxedo. It was a perfectly tailored, custom (of course) Gucci suit that excentuate his broad shoulders and the nip of his narrow hips *** ***. 

YN can’t even hear the noise of the guests - whispering about how beautiful she looks.

All she can see is her future husband, who swallows harshly as an unexpected sob wracks through his chest at the sight of his bride.

The guests can’t help but look with wide eyes as the man they know - who they’ve barely ever seen smile, let alone cry, cannot control his emotions.

Gemma, who was his ‘best man’ which they deemed ‘best woman’, rubs his back soothingly with a watery smile herself at seeing her brother so estastatic as he looks at the woman of his dreams.

Harry rubs his eyes before meeting hers again.

YN is holding back her own tears as she reaches the end of the aisle.

In tradition as old as time, Harry steps forward and Rosemary passes her hand over to him in a signal that she trusts him to take care of the girl she’s spent meticulous time raising and cultivating into the person she is today.

“I trust you to take care of my girl, she is now yours,” Rosemary tells Harry, her tone is calm and full of emotion as she allows Harry to lean over to kiss her cheek softly.

Harry nods, his usually stable voice shaky as he replies, “I promise, I’ll take care of her until the day I die.”

Rosemary nods before patting his cheek and finding her seat in the audience.

When they are finally standing face-to-face, YN reaches over to thumb off a stray tear that was sliding down his cheek before he turns his head to kiss her thumb then kissing her palm. 

Harry didn’t even acknowledge that there was anyone else watching - it was just him and her.

“Y’look breathtaking, can’t believe y’mine,” Harry murmurs trembling, his chest moving faster than usual and it felt like it was nearly impossible for him to catch his breath as he looked at the woman in front of him.

When it comes to the vows, Bethany hands over her small piece of paper that she had scribbled onto and scratched out multiple times - never quite able to get the wording just right and she says just that.

“I couldn’t find the right words to explain my love for you,” She starts, voice raspy as she looks up to see Harry watching her raptly, eyes intense and only focused on her.

“And maybe there aren’t even words to explain it because nothing felt like enough. It is how I feel a lot of the time with you. I’ll never have enough of you because you’re all-consuming to me. I have never felt happiness like I have with you.”

YN is trying to stifle her tears as she continues, Harry reaches out to rub her arm in reassurance then he lightly brushes over the new necklace he had gifted her, “You’re by far the most complex, closed-off person I have ever met. I feel like you’ve allowed me to crack the code and once I did, I wasn’t disappointed. I’ve cracked my own code, you see.”

“The code to explaining my feelings for you will come with my dedication, love, loyalty to be your wife for the rest of our lives.”

Harry can’t help what he does next despite it not falling in line at the ceremony.

His hands come up to cup her jaw and he sears his lips to hers, kissing her with all the passion and emotion he cannot seem to keep in any longer. It’s too much, has to show her in that moment how much he loves her.

A few of his uncles whistle from the crowd as their wives smack their chests in warning.

YN giggles, returning the kiss before pushing him off. 

The look in his eyes is one she knows extremely well - it sends shivers down her spine and makes her hair stand on end -, the stare down of lust and want.

“Mr. Styles,” The officiant redirects, nodding towards the piece of paper he has in his hand.

“Yeah, sorry,” Harry mumbles, unraveling the wrinkled notecard he had tucked in his inner suit pocket.

“I knew I was in love with you the moment you spilled that drink on me and undressed me in that dodgy employee bathroom,” Harry says with full sincerity, smirking at YN’s blush when he brings up the way they met.

“I tried to talk myself out of it. It was impossible to fall in love in mere minutes of meeting someone but it was the truth. I knew after our first date that I wanted y’to be m’wife. I knew after the second that I wanted y’to be the mother of my babies one day. And by the third date, I was planning on buying you a ring.”

“It sounds insane because it is. I’ve never been an impulsive, spur-of-the-moment, hopeful person before you. You made me throw all that out of the window, you make me feel alive, and when I tell you that you saved me. You saved me, m’love.”

“There is a lot of uncertainty in this world but I can tell you one thing that is absolutely fuckin’ certain -”

“Harry,” YN hisses with an eye-roll at his crude language.

“The one thing that is absolutely certain in this world is that I will always love you, always take care of you, and always do everythin’ in m’power to make you happy.”

The guests in the chairs are quite speechless. 

They’d never heard such passionate, meaningful vows from a couple. 

This was not what they were expecting of Harry who had never once put his heart on his sleeve and right now he’d laid it all out on the table.

--

“YN LN, do you agree to take Harry Edward Styles as your husband? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, until the end of your time on earth?” The officiant asks, voice ringing against the walls of the castle.

YN has to take a big breath before she replies in a strong, firm voice as her eyes bore into Harry’s, “I do.”

“Harry Edward Styles, do you agree to take YN MN LN as your wife? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, until the end of your time on earth?” The officiant repeats.

Harry, in ever typical fashion, in his loud, booming voice replies, “Of course I fuckin’ do.”

The guests in the audience laugh lightly as the officiant states, “I now announce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Styles. You may now kiss your bride.”

It doesn’t take more than a second for Harry to step forward, grip her face and pull her in for a kiss, it doesn’t matter that their family is there to him as he licks into her mouth which is bordering on obscene before YN brings it back to a softer, more appropriate one.

He whispers against his lips, barely audible, “Can’t believe y’my fucking wife, m’fucking heart.”

--

As people are moving towards the reception area, Harry manages to find a secluded area of the outside gardens where there is no one in sight.

“Baby, baby, y’married me,” Harry is nearly chanting, like he’s in disbelief, at the same time he’s cornering his new bride up against the brick wall with his mouth trailing sloppy wet kisses down her shoulder.

“Mmm, it was everything I ever imagined, it was so beautiful. Everything I had imagined for our day,” YN replies blissfully, hands running carefully through his meticulously styled hair.

When he bends down and lifts up the bottom of her dress, she giggles when he ducks his head underneath all the tulle and fabric, finding a very skimpy pair of white lace panties that are supposed to be saved for later.

“Harry,” YN scolds half-heartedly, it would only take one person to find them in this undeniable inappropriate situation but she willingly let him push her further against the brick and take one of her legs over his shoulder.

“Baby, these fuckin’ panties,” He groans, muffled by the barrier of the heavy fabric, and she hisses when pulls them down to the thick of her thighs and his mouths finds her center within moments.

“Fu-fuck,” She hisses, trying to keep her moans down as he wastes no time in pushing in two thick fingers to curve towards her front as his tongue laps quickly and sloppily on her clit until it feels like she’s about to explode.

“S’right, fuckin’ m’cunt. I have it f’the rest of my life, found the best one,” Harry mutters against her wet skin, almost to himself like he can’t even believe the words, before he’s back to speeding up his fingers to match the rhythm of his mouth until she’s quivering for a whole other reason now.

It takes a few minutes for Harry to calm himself down enough to be able to go into the reception, he tells YN that he can’t even look at her right now because if he does he’ll be perpetually hard throughout the whole thing.

--

The reception is more of a dinner than a party. 

Fairy lights strung above the two long tables where decadent, mouth-watering food was served with the orchestra playing light, melodic music in the background. ***

It was perfect. 

Their family drank, laughed, ate, and were merry. 

Everyone was basking in each other’s company, congratulating the new couple, and enjoying all the beauty that was surrounding them at the castle. 

There is not much more to say than that. 

--

The honeymoon suite was located on one of the highest floors of the castle, away from all of the other wedding guests and staff.

YN was sure it was beautiful but from the moment she was carried over the threshold, she didn’t see anything but her new husband - he was blinding in his beauty. His skin was glowing, a slight sheen of sweat from the reception, and the still warm bite in the breeze. ***

“Sweetheart, baby. Please let m’undress you, y’my wife,” Harry pleas softly, his hands are everywhere - her face, her shoulders, hips - continuously wandering as if it’s impossible to find one place to settle.

“Please, c’mon. I need you, H,” She agrees, letting him take down the zipper on the side of her gown.

The expensive garment discarded on the floor in a pool of fabric as he fully takes in her lingerie set. ***

“Fuck me, darlin’,” Harry chuckles in amazement, fingertips tracing over the delicate lace that was stitched by Alessandro Michele himself for the bride, "Y’body is a god damn dream, look at you. - fuck.”

“Please,” His wife whimpers, voice desperate as his light and careful touches are no longer enough. 

She needs him close, she needs her husband.

“Okay, okay,” He simpers, moving her back until he can have her right where he wants her, on her back in the middle of the massive, blanket-ridden bed - her white lingerie standing out against the dark duvet.

Harry had always imagined this night. 

To have someone laid out underneath him. 

No rush, no urgency but to truly, physically show that person through touch that you love them.

He starts near her collarbone, feathery heated kisses that warm her skin as she welcomes him with heavy weight on top of her so eager he wasn’t even undressed yet.

When his mouth finds her nipples through the sheer fabric, she pushes her chest up in encouragement as he bites at the nubs with sharp but careful teeth that wet the fabric.

“It feels so good, baby,” YN mewls, letting him nip and suck for a moment before pushing him up until he’s rid of every inch of fabric that had been covering his body.

“M’always gonna make y’feel good. I’ll fuck you wherever, wehenver cause you’re m’wife,” Harry grunts, impatiently reaching behind to unclasp the corset until her breasts spill free and jiggle in a way that makes his mouth water.

“Wait, wait,” YN puts a hand to his cheek when he already has his mouth darting out to lap at her hardened nipple.

“Don’t make me wait, m’heart,” Harry grumbles with a furrowed brow, his hand still unable to stop from reaching up to palm at her full breasts, thumbs rolling the nipples as he stares fiercely up at her.

“You know how you got me a present?” YN murmurs, biting back a whimper when a zip of electricity shoots from her nipple down to where she’s already dripping for him, “I got you something too.”

Harry’s face relaxes, it’s like he finds his grounding again, “Baby, didn’t need t’get me anythin’. Y’the best fuckin’ gift I could have gotten. Does look beautiful sittin’ between y’tits though.”

His new wife giggles, “Well I really hope you like mine….it’s non-refundable.”

He looks at her with confusion even more so when she wriggles down her panties and flips on her belly with her arms resting under chin.

Of course, Harry finds it immediately and she can tell by the deep, pleased growl he emits from the back of his throat, “You fuckin’ didn’t.”

“I did.”

It was his name, small and cursive right on her bum cheek. 

After they got engaged, he went out and got her name tattooed on his pec - much to her dismay. 

She had never talked about returning the favor and had kept it the ultimate surprise.

“I think I almost just came from this,” Harry rasps, his fingers tracing the small ink over and over in awe, “Baby, y’put m’name on your bum. It makes y’look like my property, sweetheart.”

“I am yours,” YN giggles, yelping when she feels his teeth graze the sensitive skin before he’s suckling and licking at his name - can’t take his eyes off the beauty of her.

“Yeah, you fuckin’ are,” He agrees whole-heartedly, his hands calming to cup and palm at her cheeks as he fawns over his wedding present, “This is the best present I’d ever fuckin’ received, fuck - never goin’ to get over this.”

He doesn’t want to look away from the tattoo but knows how he wants to fuck his wife for the first time so he flips her onto her back once again, lips finding hers. 

She whispers, hand wrapping around his cock, “Still have to pay you back for earlier.”

“No blowies tonight, pet. We’re goin’ to do it the right way, m’gonna make love to you,” Harry murmurs, his lips finding hers as he bats her hand away to grasp at his thick base. He teases the sensitive head over her clit and entrance a few times before slowly sinking in.

“Ohh, been ready for you all day. You looked like a fucking wet dream standing at the alter, waiting for me,” YN sighs happily, wriggling her hips to adjust a bit before she spreads her legs and lets Harry rest in between them, “Ever since I saw you in the suit, I’ve been waiting.”

“Yeah, baby? I can tell, y’so wet, warm f’me,” Harry praises, his movements are slow and unrushed, their hips meeting gently as he pushes in each time with care, “Can’t believe y’gonna let me have this for the rest of m’life.”

“I love you so so much,” She utters breathlessly as he continues to make her feel so fucking full - emotionally and physically, “Best husband ever, can’t believe it.”

Harry chuckles tenderly, “Baby, I need y’to come soon. I’m so close, never come this quick. The thought of y’being my wife is making it impossible to last then with the tatto-”

YN soothes his hair in understanding, pushing up to meet their lips and allow their tongues to dance as he lifts her thigh against his hip to thrust in with a bit more force. His thumb comes to her clit to spur her along which doesn’t take much with how aroused she’s been all day.

Harry follows right after, much to his embarrassment of his lack of stamina but can you blame him? He has the hottest fucking wife on the planet.

“Round two?” YN smirks as he leans down to pepper kisses all over her cheeks. She knows the night has just begun.

“Mmm,” He agrees instantly, “Now that we made love, m’gonna fuck y’from behind so I can watch my name jiggle on your arse.”

And that’s what he does. It takes nearly no rebound time, flips her on her belly again to gaze and worship his name as he fills out in no time again. His fingers occasionally dip back between her thighs to tease at her entrance before he swipes her own wetness on the tattoo to lick it off.

She’s tired, exhausted from the events of the day but wants to reach that last orgasm before sleep overtakes them. 

On her hands and knees, Harry doesn’t pound into her like he normally would. 

Instead, he eases back in with eyes darting between his wedding present and where they’re connecting, his thumb diligently rubbing hard and steady circle on her nerves.

“C’mon wifey, need y’to not be stubborn,” Harry goads, feeling his release coming again - he pinches her clit with just enough pressure that has her whining before Harry has to hold her up by the waist as she quivers.

It has him finishing right after with a gentle smack to her bumcheek, the skin already tender and sore from all of his attention on the spot as it was.

“I loved your vows,” YN murmurs against his chest. He had wrapped her up in one of the plush blankets and he had pulled on a tight pair of briefs and they were laying on a lounge chair on the blacony under the italian stars.

“I loved yours just as much, y’did crack the code m’love ‘cause now I’m yours forever,” Harry rumbles, his voice raspy with drowsiness.

Little did they know that in a few short years, they would be back under these italian stars with knowledge that they were growing a little product of their love in her belly.

A litte baby named Ivy, just like the beautiful, lucious nature that had decorated the place in magneificent as they spoke vows - dedicating their lives to each other.

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[snowangeldotmp3]

here, have a part two to this.

Robin can’t focus on anything that’s not the small vampire across from her. They’re supposed to be looking for one of Nancy’s necklaces, made from pure silver, to test one of Dustin’s stupid theories about what works against vampires and what doesn’t. But Robin can’t tear her eyes away from the brunette curls tucked behind Nancy’s ears. 

“Stop staring at me,” she says, not looking up from her vanity. 

Robin sputters, “Wha—I’m not—fine. I’m sorry.” Nancy looks at Robin’s reflection through the mirror on her vanity, red eyes playfully scanning Robin. Or sizing her up. Robin may never truly know if Nancy considers her food or not.

(Honestly, she’s okay with that.)

“It’s just…” Robin trails off. Nancy spins around, head cocked to the side. 

“Just…what?”

“You have, like, cute little pointy ears now.” Robin smiles. Nancy’s expression turns deadly, but Robin knows there’s no bite behind it. 

“I could kill you, you know,” she states, strolling up to Robin. Robin crosses her arms, an easy smile tugging at her lips. 

“You could. But you won’t.” She watches Nancy’s face contort, fighting back her own smirk. 

Nancy has to look up to fully meet Robin’s eye, challenging her. Do you really want to find out? 

And then there’s the warm, funny feeling that Robin gets. Truthfully she felt it way before this happened, but something about Nancy’s situation pushed them together further. Robin would’ve done anything (and would still do anything) for Nancy because that’s just who Robin is and what friends do. She’s been reprimanded for it before, throwing herself into reckless abandon just for the sake of someone else, with little to no regard for her own life.

(If you had known Robin before, you would know that she’d be surprised that she’d made it this far. She’d gotten so bored with life, especially in Hawkins, that she genuinely didn’t know what else would come from it. Add that with the fact that she’d often felt like her whole life was one big error, a spirit placed--trapped--in the wrong place at the wrong time, and now she suffered the consequences. And then Starcourt happened. And while it was scary as hell, she thanked whatever deity was listening that something interesting was happening in Hawkins. Even if she did get drugged by Russians in the process. She’s glad she has made it this far; where else would she get to see vampires?)

But now…now Robin can’t imagine her life without Nancy. Without her wit, her sharp tongue, her competitiveness, and the way she’s the only one who can hold an intellectual conversation with Robin. The way Nancy is perhaps the kindest person she knows; even though Nancy denies this, Robin’s seen how she joins Holly, playing with the dolls in the dollhouse and her stuffed animals. She’s seen her old “costumes” from when she dressed up for Mike’s Dungeons and Dragons nights. (Robin has tried to convince her to do it again, only if she can relish in the adorable nerdiness that is Nancy Wheeler.)

Robin’s heartbeat picks up at the thought, and she hopes that Nancy can’t hear—or at least will ignore—the slight uptick in her heart.

She ignores how Nancy’s pupils look just a touch wider than they did a moment ago.

“Oh my god,” she says, Nancy’s stare still burning into her own, “are you trying to use thrall on me?”

Nancy laughs, “What? No!” 

Robin struggles to keep her face firm, “Mhm. Mhm. Sounds like something someone trying to use thrall would say. Unless you’re just trying to get a good look at my eyes, Wheeler,” she finishes with a wink before dissolving into her own giggles.

Nancy smiles this time. It’s a real, full smile that shows her dimples and her fangs and makes her eyes sparkle. Not the closed-mouth ones she’d used to hide her fangs. Robin thinks that it’s gorgeous; she could stare at it forever. 

The words spill out of Robin’s mouth before she can stop them, “I’ve missed that smile, Wheeler.”

Nancy stills. The smile—the beautiful, radiant, brilliant smile—drops from her face. Robin watches as Nancy fights the frown, lips quivering, trying to hold it together in front of Robin.