#it's good for my teeth but bad stuff went into making the toothbrush and i hate the feeling and if i swallow the toothpaste I'll die

[goatmilksoda]

People online will really act as if not everything all the time is a morally grey issue.

There will be good and there will be bad to literally everything ever and life is all about weighing those. To some people one thing may be more important than another. Sometimes these views are swayed by malice or misinformation or personal experiences or even just simple personal taste, but no matter what if something exists, it is gray in one shade or another.

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Hi, I've got a request for Gavi where reader tells him that she's pregnant. That's pretty much all I thought of sorry

Also known as Gender Reveal (10)!

Blessing - P.G6

Summary: Two small lines can change the world for you and your husband, Pablo.

You were throwing up once again, it was the five day in a row and the third time today you visited the bathroom to let all the content of your stomach out.

"¡Amor!" You heard your two years husband, Gavi before you felt him burst in into the bathroom pulling your hair up and pat your back softly "Let it out"

"Don-ugh!" You lift your hand but quickly cut yourself off and grabbed the end of the toilet. You waited for a few minutes and after you had let everything out, you sighed and quickly shut the lid and flushed the toilet.

With the help of Pablo, you sat on top of the lid as you wiped your mouth looking down at your lap.

"Amor" Pablo crounched down and you looked at him feeling embarrassed and not wanting to worry him "Hey, hey... Look at me"

"I'm fine" You whispered softly

"Don't lie to me straight to my face, please" You looked away and sighed "You throwing up daily these past days and you throwing up three times today while it's barely even 2pm is worrying me. This is not just a stomach bug anymore"

"Don't worry, please" You whisper

"How could I just not worry? You're my wife, I'm always worried that something may happen to you and the fact you're just dismissing this is worrying me even more"

"I honestly don't feel bad" You look into his brown eyes "I'm just really tired lately and I feel really hungry out of nowhere"

"But then you throw up" You nod wanting to cry

"I don't know what's happening to me" You hid your face into your hands and start breaking bit by bit

"Hey no, don't cry"

You feel Pablo's arms tightening around your frame and soon you are feeling his lips on top of your hand, exactly where your cheek is, you quickly push that hand away to allow him to kiss your skin as your hand mets his cheek lovingly.

"I know you don't like doctors" He starts as you turn to face him as he wipes your tears away "but I think it'll be good if we check what's going on, if its the flu-"

"Baby" You cut him off shakking your head

"-maybe you have a low value, platelets? hemoglobin? what do I know, but we can discard anything. Please" His eyes pleaded you "I just don't like seeing you like this, I want you healthy. Always"

You also didn't like feeling like this and after a few seconds, you nodded.

"Okay" You nod

"Okay?" He asks with a small smile as you nod softly "Okay" You kiss his ear softly

"Can you pass me my toothbrush, please?"

"I will kiss you right now"

"Ew, no" You shook your head

"I will" He leaned in as you leaned back "Y/N"

"No" You laughed

"Gimme a kiss" You shook your head

"I will give you a kiss after I brush my teeth"

"I really don't care about it, you can give a kiss now and a kiss after"

"No!" You laugh and soon he joins leaning in to kkiss your cheek before he removes himself from you and goes to the sink to look for your toothbrush

"Al cabo que ni quería, que te huele la boca horrible" (After all, I didn't even want to, because your mouth smells horrible) His tone let you know he was teasing you

"I just threw up!"

"¡Fua, que horrible!" (how awful!)

"¡Pablo Martín, ven acá que te beso de una!" (come here and I'll kiss you!)

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

"So, you already went to the doctor?" Aurora said as you nod softly drinking from your ice coffee "What did it say?"

"I'm good, everything's good" You say "but I'm still taking some vitamins just in case" She nods

You had gone to the doctor with Pablo, two weeks ago and did every kind of tests, to make sure nothing was out of place or had some kind of virus and stuff. Nothing, absolutely nothing was wrong.

"And the throwing up?"

"It's not often now" You shrug "I think it was some burrito I had" You say not minding it but then you yawned

"You feel tired?" You nod

"I don't know why. I mean, I took a nap before coming here but I guess work has been hetic and I guess I was just catching up on it" You look at her smiling softly when out of nowhere you felt hungry and looked confused "I'm hungry" You said "I want an avocado with chocolate ice cream"

"You what?"

"I'm craving some avocado with chocolate ice cream" You said simply "Do you think they'll sell it here?" You looked around "Maybe with a cracker too"

"Y/N" Aurora said but you didn't heard her, too busy looking for a waitress "Cariño" You looked at her waiting for her to speak

"Can I have some of your ice cream? I'm really hungry and I don't think they will sell that here, the most I'll get are weird looks from everyone" She only handed you her ice cream to see you dig into it

"When was the last time you had your period?" You hum inserting two full spoons of ice cream into your mouth

"I don't know" You shrug softly "I can't remember very well right now... I think it was the 25th?"

"Month?" You stopped eating ice cream and got serious knowing where she was getting into, you look around for your phone "The last time I got my period was two months ago" You looked at Aurora "Aurora..."

"Are you regular?" You nod "We need to do a test"

"But it's impossible, I already did blood tests nothing came out of it"

"Maybe they didn't do a pregnancy test? I don't know but there's a possibility of you being pregnant"

"Are you kidding me?"

"Does it look like I'm kidding you?" You whined starting to eat once again the ice cream "I feel so happy right now"

"What if he doesn't want it?" You asked "I mean... We talked about it but we never started trying for it"

"Pablo's crazy for you, he loves you and he talks about a future with you, he would love to have a baby with you"

"We don't even know if I am pregnant or not"

"And that's why I'm here for. Let's buy a test"

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

"Ok, one minute left" You said sitting on Pablo's side of the bed "Two lines pregnant and one line not pregnant" You say and Aurora nods going over to hug you "I'm so nervous, I don't even think I peed right"

"What?"

"I don't even know what I'm saying"

"Calm down"

"How can I calm down if there's a possibility of having a half Pablo and a half me inside of me right now?" You ask standing up "Is the minute done, now?"

"It has gone barely five seconds" She looks at her phone

"Why time goes fast in some things and slow with ohters? I need this already" You whine as Aurora laughs

"Babygirl, don't worry too much. If it is, it'll be the most loved baby in this world both by its parents and by its whole family. And if it's not it'll be a false alarm"

"A false alarm I kinda want to be true" You said "After you told me about that, I have been thinking and thinking of it and I just- I don't know" You lift your shoulders "I want to be pregnant" You said softly looking at your sister-in-law

"Your time will come, Y/N/N. And if the time's now, it'll be the right one" And as if it was by magic, the timer went off "Are you ready?"

"I'm nervous" You said

"You want me to watch it?" You doubted for a few seconds before shaking your head

"I go" You went inside the bathroom and grabbed one of the three tests. You sighed deeply before looking down at your hand.

Two lines.

Your breath got caught in your throat, you quickly grabbed the other two and the answer was the same.

Two lines.

Pregnant.

You were shaking and feel your heart full, you smiled and teared up before crossing your hands around your yet non-existent belly. "Dear lord. I'm pregnant" You whisper looking down at yourself with a big smile

"Y/N?" You hear Aurora ask and went out "What is it?"

"I think you need to help me get some ideas on how to tell Pablo, he's going to be a dad" Her mouth opened and screams, from both of you were heard.

"I'M GONNA BE AN AUNTIE"

"AND I'M GONNA BE A MOM"

"A sexy one, by the way"

"Oh shut up" You laugh "That explains my sudden mood changes, my weird cravings, the throwing up, everything"

"You're having baby Páez inside of you. If it's a boy like Pablo, he'll suck the energy out of you" You both laugh "I remember mom being drained out after putting an annoying Pablo to sleep"

"Shit. I'm pregnant" You say once again "How do I tell this to him?"

"Right, we gotta find the way to tell my brother"

Three days have passed since you knew that you were pregnant and you couldn't hold back the news anymore and almost messed up the surprise you and Aurora, prepared.

The doorbell rangs and you instantly run towards the door.

"It's mine!" You announce watching how Pablo was already standing up to get it

"Careful, amor!"

"I got it! I'm alright!" You said opening the door to find the package Aurora left for you a few seconds ago on the floor. You picked it up, turning around "AH!" You yell scared, you didn't expected your husband to be behind you "Joder, amor. Me has asustado" (Fuck, baby. You scared me)

"I'm sorry" He smiled softly coming over to side hug you "What's that?"

"I-uhm... A little something I bought"

"Uhm" He said with his lips pressed to your cheek "May I ask what?"

"A little something for you, well us but you'll see soon"

"I'm curious. Let's open it?"

"This is just like the invoice of the purchase, what I bought comes around eight? seven? months" You said a bit unsure

"What did you bought? Something handcrafted? Why it takes so long to arrive?" You smile

"You can say that. It's in the making" You nod

"Now, I'm hella curious" He smiled "You know, you didn't have to gift me anything, amor"

"Well, it's something that just came up, it was unexpected but yeah... it's done already"

"What did you bought? And why is the invoice in that big box? Why did it came earlier and not with the package?"

"You're asking way too many questions, Pabs" You laugh nervous "but this has the answers" You gave him the white box

"You didn't killed anybody, right?"

"Oh dear god, just open that box" You say wanting to eat your nails

"Ok, I will" He said shooting you a smile before he undid the bow and opened the box "What...?"

After learning you were pregnant, you and Aurora went to the hospital and asked for an ultrasound, in there you found out you were one month and three weeks into the pregnancy. You bought small baby socks and a small barcelona jersey with the iconic GAVI 6.

You also did a small note that read "Hola papá. ¡Espero conocerte pronto, te quiero mucho! Att: Baby Páez Y/L/N" (Hi daddy. I look forward to meeting you soon, love you!) along with the pregnancy test you did

"What does this means?" He asked, his eyes lighting up with hope. "Is this...?" You smile to your husband and softly nod

"We're pregnant"

"Joder, Y/N. Thank you so much, mi vida!" He said hugging you tightly "You don't even know how happy I am, right now" You laughed "I'll be a daddy and you will be the most amazing mom, ever. Thank you so much, amor, thank you, thank you" He kissed you several times around your face "Joder, we are pregnant"

"We are" You said smiling

"Thank you for this blessing, mi vida. My little but perfect familia. Los amo a ambos" (I love you both) His hand caressed your flat tummy as you peck his lips smiling

"Y nosotros a ti, guapo" (And we love you, handsome)

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela

[dawnrider]

OTP Prompt Challenge request:

9. Morning Routine: InuKag

(I’d love to read some fluffy, domestic married Inukag morning routine bliss, but please write if/ as you feel so inspired ❤️)

Hello @xanthippe-writes ! Thanks for the prompt from this list.

This felt like it fit into my Bushel and a Peck universe so have some domestic morning routine. While not blissful, per se, it's fluffy and happy. And hopefully a bit real...

Fancy Cheese and Size Threes

“Don’t forget to grab diapers,” Kagome called from Sara’s room, the sounds of an angry baby not wanting their diaper changed following her words.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes in the mirror as his toothbrush hung out of the side of his mouth. He was trying to simultaneously wrangle curls into pigtails – Izzy’s current style of choice – and brush his own teeth while not dribbling on his shirt. “There,” he declared with a sigh, tugging on each one to pull them tight. “Go get your bag and your sweater.” Grasping the handle of his toothbrush, he got back to brushing.

“But I’m not cooooold,” Izayoi whined. Inuyasha paused in his brushing and gave his daughter a sharp look in the reflection of the mirror. She pouted, then turned on her heel to do as asked. He heard his wife cooing to Sara in order to distract her while trying to dress her. She’d hit the stage where she hated being changed in any capacity and tried to escape the changing table while you fought leggings onto her chunky little legs. “Daddy! I can’t find my sweater!”

“Nice try, pup. It’s on the chair,” he called back, spitting out the last of his toothpaste.

“Oh.”

“Uh huh.” He stepped out of the bathroom just in time to be handed an armful of squirming baby. “Well good morning to you too,” he muttered, dropping a kiss on top of her head. She squealed angrily at being restrained, little arms flailing.

“Here,” Kagome murmured. Her fingers swiped something from his face, then grabbed a towel just inside the door. “Toothpaste,” she clarified with a grin when he gave her a confused look. He sighed dramatically, then chuckled when she went up on her toes to place a kiss on his cheek. “Diapers.”

“I heard you the first time.” Inuyasha adjusted Sara in his hold to keep her from climbing over his shoulder. “She still in a size three?” Kagome nodded as she pulled socks from the top drawer and tried to balance on one foot to put each of them on before giving up and plopping onto the floor. “Anything else we need? The C word?” he whispered the last, glancing toward the doorway. Izayoi was in her room, presumably struggling her way into her sweater based on the sounds she was making.

Kagome grinned wryly. “Probably not a bad idea. Just don’t get the soft kind. She doesn’t like those anymore.” He nodded. No string cheese, only the sticks. Got it. “Can you grab a bottle of wine too?” He knew if he asked her what kind she would say anything was fine, but he would end up grabbing two and hope one of them was serviceable.

“I’ll even get us some of the fancy stuff and the you-know-whats you like.”

Kagome’s eyes glowed. “Can we watch that movie I’ve had saved for later?” Inuyasha pretended to hate the idea, but nodded anyway, a sly smile lifting his lips. Fancy cheese and cracker night was a long-standing tradition. Especially now with both girls, they rarely got the chance to get out for an actual date night, so an old romance adventure movie on the couch with “fancy” grocery store cheese and crackers was about as much of a date night as they could reasonably expect.

“Am I gonna be late, Daddy?” Izayoi called from her room. She had only minimal understanding of the clock, but knew that time was a factor in their day. Inuyasha glanced at his watch and swore under his breath. “That’s a bad word!” Izayoi scolded, sounding scandalized.

“Yea, yea. Just don’t repeat it. Bye. I love you,” he murmured, kissing Sara’s squishy cheek and handing her to Kagome. “You too.”

Kagome grinned as he pressed a kiss to her lips, snatching his collar for a moment to keep him there. “Love you. Fancy date night.”

“And diapers. I know.” He grinned, kissing her one last time, then went to scoop up the four year old. Despite her protests, she’d put on her sweater and had her little backpack strapped on her back, the clip done in front. “You’re gonna have to take that off in the car, you know.”

“I know. I don’t wanna lose it!”

“Kid, that would be some kinda skill to lose your bag between here and the car,” he said with a chuckle. Despite his teasing, he wouldn’t put it past her to set it down somewhere and get distracted. He asked her about what she planned to do at preschool today and she told him elaborately the picture she planned to color and the tower she wanted to build in the block corner because Joey – another hanyou child she seemed to have a love-rivalry relationship with – had knocked over her last one before it was finished.

As he was backing down the driveway, he looked up and spotted Kagome holding Sara, chubby baby hands banging on the window glass and a face that told him she was squealing with laughter.

“Wave bye to your sister.”

“Bye Baby! Bye Mama,” Izayoi called as she waved back. Inuyasha grinned and gave a little wave too, making Sara screech and smack the glass again. Kagome was barely holding in laughter and she wiggled her fingers to say goodbye as well. “Daddy?”

“Yea, pup.”

“When I’m bigger, can I eat fancy cheese too?”

Inuyasha nearly choked, then smothered a laugh so he could look at her seriously in the rearview. “Sure, pup. You can eat fancy cheese when you get older.”

“Good. I wanna know what’s so great about it. You and Mama never share.”

“Trust me, Iz. When you get older, you’ll understand.”

“You alllllways say that.”

“Yup. And it’s pretty much always true.” He shook his head and smiled, seeing the slight pout on her face. “Guess what.” Her ears perked up, her pigtails quivering behind them. “We have to stop at the store on the way home from school later. You want to pick out a treat for you and Sara?”

Her eyes got huge and her mouth dropped open. “Really?!” He nodded. She squealed in excitement, then stopped almost immediately as both their ears flattened at the noise. “Sorry, Daddy.” Inuyasha only reached back behind his seat and patted her leg. She still had a lot to learn about being hanyou, but she was learning, and he couldn’t be more proud.

[ni-kiiiii]

Insecurities • Hwang Hyunjin pt.2

Pt.1 pt.2

-angst, fluff

A/n: I made apart 2 because someone asked ( thank you for enjoying it💗) and because I like the storyline.

Enjoy

——————————————————————————RECAP

Hyunjin wraps his leg over you and you fell asleep like babies.

——————————————————————————

You woke to Hyunjin room door closing. You didn’t think anything of it so you went back to sleep and cuddled back with Hyunjin.

Hyunjin was already awake when you woke for a second time but the thing is he was just staring at you.

“What are you staring at” you lowly cause you still have disgusting morning breath.

“ Your beautiful face” he said proudly.

“Yeah whatever” you mumble. You were still insecure about yourself so no matter what hyunjin said it wouldn’t matter.

You got up out the bed and went to the living room to get your bag with your stuff. While you walked to The living room Sohee and her minions were staring at you with grins . You didn’t know why so you just grabbed your bags and walked to the bathroom. When you got in and opened your bag you saw the most disgusting things on your clothes. Mustard, relish, rice, ketchup, and you name it. You were so pissed off right now. But the only thing safe was your toothbrush ‘thank the lord’. You turned the sink on and You put toothpaste on your toothbrush and dipped your toothbrush and water. Then you started brushing your teeth and tongue ( ppl forget to do that like wtf) until you felt like your were finished.

You left the bathroom and went straight out the main door to go home.

- Time skip (then next day at school)

You were happy that you and Hyunjin were on good terms but not only that y’all were dating officially. But no one knew about it of course.

When You were walking through the school gates you noticed almost all of the girls were staring at you with disgusted eyes. Then when you walked through the school halls you saw people whispering when they saw you. You knew it had something with Sohee, she was the so called “QUEEN” in the school. Her parents where the head of the school so she would never get in trouble.

- time skip

Lunch is when things start to get bad. When you leaving fourth period to go to lunch someone grabbed you by the hair and threw you on the floor. Then proceeded to drag me by the hair all the way to the girls bathroom. You were so much pain you couldn’t even describe it They caught you at a good time because no one was in the halls when this happened.

“ your a fucking slut for sleeping with Hyunjin”

“Who do you think you are sleeping with him”

“ your not even pretty”

“ your just fat and ugly”

“She should kill herself”

‘Welp there goes my confidence’ you thought.

These girl went on with these horrible comments until one of the girl went on one knee to be on my level. “ the next time we see you with Hyunjin we will really hurt you” she snarled. Then they left while laughing.

You sat there with tears threatening to fall from eyes because you didn’t want to cry for stupid people like them. But it was very hard not too because your scalp felt like it was gonna explode from the pain.

You took yourself to one of the bathroom stalls and checked your phone. You smiled when you saw Hyunjin had texted you. At least you knew he was worried about you.

You took a deep breath, looked in the mirror to make sure you didn’t look hurt in anyway and left the bathroom to go to the lunchroom. When you arrived to the lunchroom EVERYONE WAS STARING AT YOU, even the boys. You just tuned everyone out and walked to sit across from hyunjin. When finally you sat down and looked at Hyunjin looked like he wanted to punch someone.

“ what’s wrong Hyunjin” you asked

He didn’t even bother to respond he just pulled up the video of me getting dragged with hateful comments.

“Oh” you deadpanned.

“It’s fine I’m really o-” you were cut off by Hyunjin.

“LISTEN UP EVERYONE!” HYUNJIN yelled grabbing everyone’s attention.

“ME AND Y/N ARE JUST BEST FRIENDS WE KNEW EACH OTHER SINCE SECOND GRADE SO OF COURSE WERE CLOSE. SO STOP BULLYING HER BECAUSE SHE DID NOTHING WRONG. …. TO THE GIRLS WHO BULLIED Y/N, YOU GUYS NEVER HAD CHANCE WITH ME , ESPECIALLY THE WHO GRABBED HER BY THE HAIR. ALSO I ALREADY HAVE A GIRLFRIEND SO PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE.” Hyunjin had yelled so that everyone could here him since the cafeteria was huge.

Hyunjin sat back down but this time next to me. He started massaging my head since he knew getting dragged by the hair definitely hurt.

You turned to look at him “you didn’t have to do that you know”

“I know I didn’t I did it because care for you” Hyunjin replied.

You put your head down because you flustered and tired from just happend.

- time skip to later that day

(Fluff 💗)

You were cuddling on Hyunjin couch since you guys made plans to hang out. You had your legs wrapped around his waist while you had your head nestled between the crook of his neck. Hyunjin had his arms wrapped you holding you tight. This was the norm. You guys were comfortable with each other so nothing felt weird or awkward.

You wanted spicy things up so started kissing him neck. You felt hyunjin get tense so you stopped not wanted to invade his boundaries.

“Why did you stop?” hyunjin whined.

With that response you started kissing him on the neck.

“ now baby kiss me on the lips” he said out of the blue.

This time you got tense.

‘ OMG HE WANTS ME TO KISS HIM IN THE LIPS’ you screamed in your mind.

“ I wouldn’t hyune but I don’t know how” you say putting your head down in embarrassment.

“ It’s okay I don’t judge ” he grinned

Hyunjin lifted your head with his thumb and kissed you. You didn’t know how to kiss but you sure tried for him.

-

You and Hyunjin were endgame together. No one ever fucked around with you every since hyunjin stuck up for that day. Which was amazing for you because you knew your insecurities weren’t gonna get any better if those girls kept bullying you. As time passed so did your insecurities and Hyunjin helped you with it. He told you every day that your perfect the way your until you believed him and that’s why you loved him.

THE END

——————————————————————————

A/n: Ty guys for liking my work it means a lot me. @armystay89 here you go💗

I hope you guys this story

[br1ghtestlight]

random thought but i love eugene mirman's gene sounds ESPECIALLY when gene is sleeping. they're so good & cute

louise tina bob and linda looking @ gene literally exactly like this when he forgets how his song goes at breakfast LMAOO

love that tina and louise seem to actually pay attention to what songs gene is writing and what they're about despite the fact that there are SO MANY. supportive family <3

gene's dream.... bro that was god speaking to you. like for real wtf

also im only a minute in and there are SO MANY good screenshots already he's such a cutie i love him so much!!!! <3 gene episodes my beloved

"Now I'm going to change into last night's pajamas, AKA my only pajamas, and brush my teeth with Tina's toothbrush because that's what I accidentally did last night."

"Wait, what?"

gene and tina are so silly?? 😭

me and gene share many similarities including waking up in the middle of the night every two hours for no fucking reason. like THATS relatable

MR AMBROSE APPEARANCE LETS FUCKING GOOO‼️‼️ why does his voice sound slightly sped up is he okay. does he have a new voice actor?? he sounds slightly off not like in a bad way its just strange

THERE WAS A NEW VOICE ACTOR BCUZ BILLY EICHNER WASNT CREDITED maybe bcuz its such a small appearance but thats very weird. i feel like mickey fans in season 12 episode 6 when loren did that horrible mickey impression 😭😭 also whoever did his voice in this episode wasnt credited so it was somebody from the main cast doing an impression of him. will try to figure out who. sorry episode review cancelled i need to figure out who the hell voiced mr ambrose in this episode

based on the fact that u cant obviously tell who it is i dont think its eugene mirman and probably not h jon benjiman?? dan mintz can only do one voice so its not him either. probably either john roberts larry murphy or a random crew member who they didnt bother to credit

(most likely billy eischner just wasn't avaliable to voice mr ambrose due to his movie career etc so i dont blame them but it was noticeable enough to ME that i needed to figure it out. not even a bad impression honestly the average fan wouldnt notice)

"What do you lucid dream about?"

"I do revenge stuff on people who were mean to me in high school, some fantasy and science fiction, some adult stuff I can't tell you about."

this is literally the gayest thing mr ambrose has ever said omg FHFMDDJKSKS i cant believe this drama club ass nerd was bullied in high school who could have guessed. not me thats for sure

(now somebody has to write a fanfic about mr ambrose having Adult Stuff dreams about mr frond. i want this on my desk by 3pm tomorrow)

love mr ambrose and his gay ass curly hair..... mr ambrose my beloved <33 kisses u

i dont have anything to say im just strangely invested in gene's lucid dreaming plot at this point. Love all his silly little dreams and its incredible he never seems to have any nightmares or anything!!

this is reminding me of the movie where gene had a dream and he was scared that he wasn't good at music and that people weren't going to like his performance and the aliens came down to told him to stop 😭😭💔 his insecurity that he might not be that good a musician literally makes me cry. he's so sweet and kindhearted my babyy boy

CAN I SKIP SCHOOL AND GO BACK TO SLEEP LMAO

"Even successful musicians went to sixth grade, Gene."

"That's a MYTH!!"

weirdly mr ambrose started sounding completely normal at some point like did his voice actor come back and just wasn't credited?? or whoever did this impression was REALLY good jfc

mr ambrose HATES these fuckign kids bro

HES SO UNHINGED LMAO 😭😭

NOT THE STARING AGAIN. why are they literally just this image every single time gene plays music in this episode im gonna cry

love this specific frame of gene running his hand through his hair

awww bob is such a good dad

sidenote but this subplot with tina and louise is so stupid it actually made me laugh LMAO the fucking girl cricket. thr female cricket. like what if he's gay huh what then

"or if she's not his type she also makes a great best friend. she's a good listener" THANK YOU louise for acknowledging the cricket might be gay. she's an ally 🙏

AWW GENE WRITING HIS SONG <3 eugene mirman isnt a Good singer (not hating he literally says that all the time. they have to record each line seperately bcuz he cant sing on key) so its hard to tell when they're trying to make gene's songs seem good or not but this is really sweet. u can tell he just loves music so much

why is gene's song kinda making me emotional..... like this show is usually 50/50 on if it actually wants to take gene's songwriting ability seriously but in this episode its so clear how much he LOVES music and songwriting and how talented he is at it. he has trouble with focus and commitment sometimes but thats never an issue when it comes to his music and he'd happily spend an entire afternoon writing a song from start to finish (even skipping out on dinner) because he was so hyperfocused. love how much respect they give gene in this episode tbh

deeply appreciate the "larry murphy as teddy" credit despite teddy not having one single line in this entire episode. Literally just a legacy credit at this point

I LOVED THIS EPISODE 😭😭💕 i dont think it'll be as widely popular as some other episodes this season but as a gene fan and an artist this episode really resonated with me. the ending sequence was actually really beautiful (gives me the same vibes as "your heart's not broken its only growing" tbh) and i loved gene's song and all the different costumes they put him in for his dreams!! tina and louise's subplot was really cute too. very enjoyable episode if you're a gene fan or just a casual viewer who wishes he got more focus. he's SO SWEET and so passionate <3

[rotationalsymmetry]

A Spoonful of Sugar

I'm a teenager. It's a school day and my alarm just went off. 20 minutes later one of my parents sticks their head in my room to complain that I'm not up yet.

I'm a kid, not sure what age exactly. My dad comes in and pretends to be a dog to wake me up. (This has happened many times. He does it with the exact same phrasing and intonation and pretty much the same set of behaviors each time. Probably got it from a parenting book or something.) Kid-me finds this hilarious and an excellent way to start the day.

I'm an adult, early to mid 20's, with a group of other mostly young people in New Orleans post-Katrina, to tear down houses contaminated with black mold at the request of their owners (mostly black people) so that even if they don't have a house any more at least they own the land. If we don't do this, the city will hire people to do it at the owners' expenses and seize the property (ie the now vacant lot) if the owners don't pay it back. Anyways, point is, someone comes around with a guitar and a song when it's time to wake up.

I'm thinking about all the things parents of babies and toddlers and otherwise very young children do to cajole them into doing things. Stickers and little prizes. Oh, you aren't sure you want to eat that? What if the spoon was an airplane flying around, what then? Which toothbrush do you want to use, the red one or the blue one? (I loved getting to choose my school supplies, what cartoon characters the pencils had on them, the erasers shaped like fruit that didn't really erase, all that.) Bedtime routines. Bath toys.

Little kids are still young enough to make it everyone else's problem when they're forced to do something they don't want. So, everyone else finds ways to make it so that it isn't being forced, so that the kid wants whatever has to happen. Gummy vitamins. Chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs.

But adults, teens, older kids, have enough self control for that fight to be strictly internal, and often when other people stop cajoling us into doing what's best for us we don't pick up the slack ourselves, we push instead of finding ways to pull. And one thing I love about this site is the genre of posts that are about finding ways to get yourself to want to go into the carrier.

I've been pretending I'm in ninja training while brushing my teeth. Do not ask me how tooth-brushing prepares me to be a ninja. I got the idea to stick though. I've been using mnemonics -- ridiculous association mind games -- to practice remembering people's names, something I've always been bad at to my embarrassement. I have so many things I don't really want to do but that I think I should do. Sometimes it's not fun silly stuff, sometimes it's more sort of stoic reframing, like "ok I'm dreading this doctor's appointment because I'm telling myself it'll be frustrating and a waste of time, I can't make sure it's not a waste of time but there is some chance it won't be a waste of time and if so then showing up is doing the right thing, and I can make sure that I show up" (and so I give myself a good grade in showing up to a doctor's appointment, something that may or may not be normal to want but is in fact possible to achieve as long as you're doing the grading yourself, or can convince someone else to do it for you.)

I'm trying to notice intrinsic joy more. Taking a shower feels good so I get free "reward" as long as I'm noticing that it feels good. Physically moving my body, stretching and using my muscles, at least some of the time, feels good. Resting can feel good. Routines like having tea in the morning feel good and give me something to look forward to and some sort of continuity in my life, predictability. This feels good. This feels good. This feels good. This feels good.

[meditating-dog-lover]

Health Update

I had a phone call with my functional medicine doctor and it went well. I know we focused a lot on gut and hormone health (primarily insulin and cortisol), which can cause skin inflammation. But what ultimately causes both these issues is an inflammatory high sugar diet and stress. They don't just happen on their own (maybe in rare cases but I'm not going to claim that's my case). Stress and a bad diet make you more susceptible to gut inflammation and microbiome imbalances and high cortisol/insulin resistance.

The goal here is just to follow an anti-inflammatory diet and reduce stress. Every other goal is secondary. My diet has been good recently and I've been adding a lot of key anti-inflammatory foods like green tea, turmeric, black pepper, sweet potatoes, and fish. I've been eating less inflammatory foods as well. Of course I want to find a balance, I just want to establish that eventually. But I've been eating pretty anti-inflammatory. I did go out for some coffee and chocolate today and got some sweet potato chips. I might want to look into a less inflammatory savory snack. They're going to be having ice cream and hot dogs/burgers/fries/mozzarella sticks at work. I'm not big on ice cream, nor hot dogs/burgers, but I love mozzarella sticks. I might have some and it's going to be on a Friday which is when I normally have a treat. Again I'm going to find a balance. I'm just happy I know the type of diet to follow and what foods to add and the fact that I've been adding foods.

Despite my diet, however, I've had some skin inflammation. I know it's due to stress. Since I went back to work and started to be productive, that puts me in a much better mood. So I was less stressed in general, and my skin looks better. I know stress management is so important and I know it's something I need to work on. My flareups started in college when I was very stressed, and they recently got so bad since the war in Gaza started. Even worse since the start of this year. So I've been in a better mood this week thankfully. I've always been so bad at managing my stress, but if it means it's going to prevent me from a horrible flareup and re-experiencing the hell I've been going through since January, then I'm going to start now.

My doctor and I spoke about some supplements for gut healing and cortisol reduction. I know I want to reduce my cortisol, but I feel general stress management would be a much better approach than popping a pill. I can use something for anxiety relief if it goes through the roof. For gut health, again the main cause of gut inflammation in my case is an inflammatory diet and severe stress. I know some people have a microbiome imbalance because they were on multiple rounds of antibiotics, were not breastfed, were born via c-section, etc... But that doesn't apply to me and it's due to something that's 100% within my control. I did want a thing I can drink to help my gut, but not a supplement and doing so while knowing that diet and stress management are way more important. So I bought some unsweetened aloe juice. Aloe vera is great for gut inflammation. I had some in a shotglass and it tastes fine. A bit sour, but not awful. It's a nice addition to my anti-inflammatory diet and I don't mind the taste and it's great for the gut lining and general inflammation. I don't know if it's safe to consume in prolonged large doses, though.

I also bought some dental tape because it's apparently better than dental floss at cleaning between wider spaced teeth. I used the generic Walgreens brand and it feels like it cleans well. It scrubs. I use woven floss but this might actually be better. Fro my experience Glide floss does not clean well at all. I have some teeth that need to be scrubbed more than others, so this thick scrubby tape can help. I need heavy duty stuff for my teeth, along with my 300$ Sonicare toothbrush. Otherwise nothing else does the trick. It might be the spacing, it might be that I have genetically more porous teeth. But it's worth trying the tape out.

[smolkiwi98]

Hii!

Can I pls get a period comfort fic with Eddie? Like reader is staying the night at eddies trailer and then they go to sleep and it’s all cuddly. But later in the night Eddie feels something warm and wet in the bed, so he lifts the comforter and sees blood. He feels bad for reader and stuff and takes care of her?

You really don’t have to, but I just need this rn❤️

Of course!! I haven't take request in a while, so I'm sorry if it's a bit bad. I hope you enjoy!

Eddie Munson x Reader

WARNING! Mentions of period and blood.

If you want to make a request go head and click here

Comfort

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tonight you were going over to your boyfriend's house which isn’t new, but the only problem there is…you woke up with cramps this morning. You’ve been around Eddie while on your period before, but you always got a little nervous when spending the night while on it. Luckily for you there was no blood, so hopefully it was a little stomach ache and nothing else. 

Eddie sat on your bed watching you walk back forth from your overnight bag to your closet to your dresser back to your bag. You didn’t know he was coming over early to pick you up, so you didn’t bother packing right away. As you were grabbing things from your dresser Eddie was going on about some D&D campaign he had planned “After this campaign is over I think the boys….and Lady Applejack wouldn’t mind if I were the Dungeon Master again. I mean I’m a great one! They would have to let me do it again.” You chuckle softly and stuff your things in your bag “I’m sure they’d love that, but your campaigns are always…brutal.” Eddie tilts his head a little and squints his eyes at you “What do you mean?” Is he really that confused? You were going to answer, but a sharp pain shot across your abdomen making you pause for a second “Are you okay?” you heard Eddie ask. You cleared your throat and nodded “Yeah!” You said with a small smile “Um…I gotta grab my toothbrush and I’ll be ready to go.” You grabbed your bag and walked to the bathroom to grab your toothbrush and to be on the safe side some pads. 

After everything was packed you two were on the way to Eddie's place. You spend a lot of time over at his place, so it feels like you should just move in already. Of course Eddie has already proposed that to you. When you two finally made it to his trailer you raced inside. Nights at Eddie’s meant snacks, movies, and cuddles. You walked into his room while he went into the living room to set up a movie. You put on a pair of night shorts and Eddie’s Dio shirt that you found laying on his bed. You let out a sigh and walked out to the living room and sat on the couch “What are we gonna watch tonight?” You asked while hugging one of the couch pillows. Eddie inserted a VHS and turned to look at you “I rented the Poltergeist.” He said with a smile “I know you like some scary movies, so I got this one.” You smiled up at him and stretched your arms out signaling him to come and hold you while you watched the movie. 

20 minutes into the movie and you passed out. Eddie was laying on his back and had you laying on top of him. His hand was in your hair and the other resting on your lower back rubbing it. Your body was so tense and you kept getting cramps every 10 minutes. Eddie knew something was up, but didn’t want to mention anything and possibly upset you. He glanced down at you and saw that you were passed out, so he thought it would be a good idea to just go ahead and take you to bed. 

~ 1 hour later ~

It was in the middle of the night when you felt someone softly pushing on you “Sweetheart~” Eddie whispered “Come on, love you gotta wake up.” You were half awake and you could hear a bit of worry in his voice. You slowly opened your eyes and blinked a few times “What’s wrong?” you asked sleep still in your voice. Eddie had his bottom lip tucked in between his teeth. You sat up a little still looking at him until you felt a wet spot in your shorts. You furrowed your eyebrows and looked down at yourself. The sight made you blush with embarrassment, you could feel tears start to build up. You had started your period in your sleep and not only did you ruin your panties and shorts, you ruined your boyfriend's bed. You looked back up at him and then you quickly looked away again “I-I’m sorry…I-I didn’t know I was going to start…” You started to ramble on not looking at him once. In the middle of your rambling Eddie gently grabbed your face with both of his hands “Sweetheart, it’s okay.” He said in a calm voice. His thumbs ran across your cheeks and under your eyes wiping away your tears “You’re not mad? O-Or disgusted?” You asked in a whisper. Eddie looked at you confused and let out a small chuckle “Why would I? This is a normal thing that happens, it’s okay.” He leans in and kisses your forehead “Why don’t you go get cleaned up and I’ll change the sheets. We can cuddle and if you want, talk afterwards.” He suggested. You didn’t really want to speak, but nodded your head at his proposal. 

After you showered and Eddie changed the sheets the two of you were back in bed. He held you close, resting his hand on your stomach rubbing it in hopes to help your cramps. Eddie had asked you a few times if you wanted to talk, but you just wanted to lay there. Eddie not wanting you to sit in your head and over think the small situation started to talk about a bunch of different things! His band, D&D, some comic book he found, what he found in his van, just different things to make you smile and forget about what happened. When he saw that your eyes were closed again and smiled to himself “I love you, Y/N. Very much.” He whispered in your ear before drifting off into sleep himself.

______________________________________________

I hope you enjoyed this little imagine! If you would like to tip me you can do so by clicking here! ❣️

[michinnyun]

could i maybe request wanda comforting the reader after they’ve just had a really bad day and are like crying and stuff? wanda just holds them and tells them everything is gonna be okay and gives forehead kisses because they make everything better!! the reader maybe is struggling with mental health / depression? don’t feel pressured to write this!! i just need comfort lmao.

Okay um. I went way overboard. Are we all depressed rn LMAO. i also like don't think i followed the prompt correctly but IF IT'S BAD JUST LET ME KNOW AND ILL TRY AGAIN

A Hug and a Kiss

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x gn!Reader

Summary: Love is patient, love is kind

Tags: Showers × showering together × milf moments tm × im love her × non sexual showering × Depression × Crying × Fluff × Fluff and Angst × Self-Esteem Issues × Self Confidence Issues × True Love

Words: 1.2k

Ao3 link

Some days are better than others. That’s how it is for everyone, right? So then why is extra damn hard for you sometimes?

That's what you think while you wallow in bed. You had things to do today, errands and chores and such. Self care. Meals to make. None of them got done.

You don't want to call Wanda. She shouldn't see you like this. Strong, beautiful Wanda, who can create new realities with a snap of her fingers. She’d just think you were pathetic.

Tears slip out for what feels like the millionth time at that thought and soak into your pillowcase. You thought you’d run out of those by now.

As if your thoughts had summoned her, there’s a knock on your apartment door as Wanda lets herself in. You bolt up in bed, panicking. She calls your name and you scramble to make yourself look semi-decent.

Your hair is a greasy rat’s nest and you've had the same sweater on for three days. What is she going to think of you now? She’s never seen you during an episode before.

“Are you okay? You weren't answering any of my messages-” she says, walking into your bedroom and taking in the sight of empty water bottles and protein shakes on your nightstand.

Your lower lip wobbles, and you can't meet her eyes. You feel ashamed, caught. She was never supposed to know about this.

You’re positive she's going to leave, disgusted with you, when she coos and descends upon you, taking you in her arms.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she murmurs, kissing your forehead, your cheeks. You start crying in earnest, and she kisses your tears too. “How long has this been going on?”

You sniffle. “A couple of days. I don't know. I kind of lost track of time.”

“Have you eaten anything?” Your eyes dart to the empty bottles on your side table and she nods, understanding.

She kisses your mouth, sweetly, and you fight the urge to push her away. “Haven't- brushed my teeth. Or showered. ‘S gross,” you say, embarrassed. She kisses you again anyway. You wrinkle your nose.

“Let’s take care of that then, hm?”

You nod hesitantly as she leads you into your bathroom, lifting your sweater over your head and taking her own clothes off. She ties her hair into a high bun on her head and turns on the shower as you take off your pajama pants and underwear. Your cheeks burn.

She grabs your toothbrush and puts a dollop of minty paste on it, coaxing you into the warm spray so you can wet your hair and brush your teeth at the same time.

Once that’s done, you leave your toothbrush next to the shampoo bottle as she lathers two pumps of the suds into your hair.

She’s careful to keep it out of your eyes. You didn't realize how much you needed this, how good it feels to get clean again. How good it feels to have some help when you can’t take care of yourself. Plus, a little bit of human touch never hurt anybody.

You sigh involuntarily as Wanda massages into your scalp. She laughs softly. “Feels good?”

You hum, nodding. She rinses the suds out, then starts on the conditioner.

You’re crying again, suddenly. After feeling nothing for so long, the tightness in your chest is unbearable. You want to hold her, thank her, kiss her and praise her until you dissolve into each other and disappear from the face of the Earth. You can’t believe she's doing this for you. It’s so unbelievably kind, especially coming from someone who’s been through so much.

You turn around, wrapping your arms around the soft skin of her middle and kissing her. It’s not with any urgency, you just can't find the right words right now to let her know how you're feeling. How she makes you feel.

Wanda seems to understand. She strokes your cheek, a gesture filled with so much affection that you think you're going to die. She’s going to kill you, and you're going to go happily, because it's her and she's taking care of you.

She pulls away, smiling at you as she takes the shower head and rinses away the rest of the slippery product.

Finally, she soaps you up, bending down to clean your legs and reaching around you to scrub your back. She presses a kiss to your mouth and leads you under the water, finally clean for the first time in days.

You step out onto your bath mat, grabbing your towel and drying yourself methodically while Wanda quickly finishes in the shower.

She comes out in all her naked glory, and you hand her her own towel.

You dry off together, then head into your room to grab fresh pajamas.

Wanda sits on the edge of your bed, her fiery hair slightly frizzed, wearing one of the huge cotton t-shirts that you keep just for her.

She beckons you over with a towel, scooting back so you can sit in the cradle of her thighs, silent as she methodically dries your hair.

You’re deeply refreshed in a way you haven't felt in a while. Her hands have transformed you, made you clean and better and whole. Well, you'll never be whole, but you've been pieced back together, at least temporarily.

She tosses the towel into your overflowing hamper when she's done, pulling you back into bed with her until your head is laying on her chest and your legs are tangled together.

She makes you so warm. You don't want to cry again, so you just turn your face into the crook of her neck. Hiding from the world. She smells so good, like honey and skin and soap.

“Thank you,” you murmur, and she strokes your hair, still a little wet from the shower.

“Of course. I wish you would've called me,” she says quietly.

Don’t cry, don't cry. You sniffle again. God damn it.

“I just- I didn't want you to worry about me,” you say lamely. She holds you closer, pressing a kiss into the crown of your head.

“Silly. I'll always worry about you.” She rubs her hand comfortingly up and down your arm, and God, this is more than you deserve.

“I don't deserve you,” you say, echoing your own thoughts.

She tsks. “Don't say that. I love you. We deserve each other.” Then she hesitates. “I get like that too sometimes, you know.”

You furrow your brows. “You do?”

She shrugs. “Well, yeah. Sometimes it all just gets to be too much, and I just shut down. All the sadness, and the what-if’s. It drains you. Drowns you. There obviously more to it but- yeah, I get it.”

You nod, amazed that you're not alone. That she understands you.

“I love you so much,” you murmur, snuggling into her, sighing gratefully when she holds you a little closer, a little tighter. “You’re wonderful. I can’t believe I met you.”

She laughs, kissing your forehead. “I love you. You’re going to be okay.” She tilts your head up, pressing her lips to yours. “I’m here. I love you.”

“I love you,” you whisper between more kisses. “I love you."

[study-coffee-chicago]

Seasons of PD: Season 7: Don’t You Ever Do That Again, You Hear Me? (A Halstead Brothers + Halstead Sister! Imagine)

A/N: There are mentions of B1ack Liv3s M4tter (apparently this ended up in that tag, so I changed the wording, so hopefully it’s not there anymore) in regards to peaceful protests in this. And there are mentions of counter-protesters causing riots. I tried my best to portray this as professionally as possible with Y/N's views, Kevin's views, and Jay's views. I did not try to offend anyone at all and I'm very sorry if I did.

Also, I don't know if one part counts as threat of sexual coercion, but I'm fairly certain that's what it's called, so trigger warning for that.

Your age: 18

Jay's age: 32

Will's age: 34

"I get that it's important to you, but I'm not letting you go!" Jay argued as you stood across from him in a screaming match.

"Why? Because You don't believe the same things as me because you haven't met a bad cop? Because you fought for this country and know people who died for it?" you yelled back.

"Yes, me being a cop and a soldier obviously has something to do with this! But I'm also trying to keep you safe! They turn into riots!"

"You do know that's not the Black Lives Matter protesters who start them, right? They're peaceful. Counter-protesting assholes come and start things to give peaceful protesters a bad image!"

"I don't want you to get hurt if something happens! Tear gas hurts, kid. I don't want you to come home with burning eyes and the possibility of going blind and tell me I'm right. I'm trying to prevent that!"

"I know you are, Jay! I just want you to let me have my own damn opinions and do what I want for once!"

"Has a cop ever hurt you in some way? Pulled you over illegally?" Jay roared.

You wanted to tell him your story about something like that that had happened five weeks ago, two weeks after the infection scare across the entire city, but you couldn't because you knew he'd do something stupid and you didn't want that. "No, but--"

His phone rang, cutting you off. "I'll be there," Jay said quickly. Then, he turned back to you. "I gotta go, caught a case. I'll see you later and we can talk about this. Calmly."

"So, you're saying there's a chance you'll let me go?"

"There's maybe a .001% chance, but sure, believe what you want."

You rolled your eyes and he left. But, as he shut and locked the apartment door, he stopped. "Love you," he whispered. Because, with what he did on the job, he knew that there was the possibility every day of him not coming home to you.

***

When you woke up, you were shocked not to see a text from Jay between 3 and 5 am saying that he wouldn't make it home tonight. He usually made it a priority when on a case to tell you that he wouldn't be coming home so that you wouldn't worry.

But, there was a voicemail from him around 11 pm last night and it was currently 9 am.

You put your phone on speaker and played it.

"Hey, Y/N, I'm sorry about arguing. If you really want to go, I think Kevin has his RDO tomorrow so I can see if he's going if you-- OW!" Then, the line just continued playing, and dragging noises were heard until there was a crash and the line went dead.

"Jay? Jay?" What the hell had happened? You quickly replayed the message to make sure it wasn't an issue with your phone, but when you heard the same exact thing again, you knew something had gone terribly wrong.

You went to dial Hailey's number to ask if she had seen Jay when there was a loud knock on your door. You quickly ran across the apartment and looked out the peephole. You saw Hailey and Adam and quickly flung open the door.

"Hey, Y/N," Adam said as he entered.

"Have you guys seen Jay?" you asked.

You saw Hailey visibly swallow. "Listen," she started, but you cut her off.

"What happened? What's going on? He usually texts me if he's going to be working until the morning and I didn't get a text and I got a voicemail and--" You took a deep, gasping breath.

"What voicemail?" Hailey asked as she placed a hand on your shoulder.

"I- It cut off partway through and he yelled and-- wait, he wasn't with you?"

"No," Hailey answered. "He said he had some personal stuff to take care of when we were at a scene and then took off. Then, he never came back, so we decided to check here to see if he just came home or something happened."

"He never came home." Your eyes widened, finally processing what it meant if he wasn't here and Intelligence couldn't find him. "You're telling me he's missing? Again? Oh, no. This can't be happening, not again. Not after our fight last night. I didn't even tell him what happened or that I loved him or--"

"Y/N, I need you to take a deep breath," Hailey told you and you tried to match her breathing. "His radio might just be dead or something like that." She knew that she was lying, but she was trying to stop you from freaking out. "Can you give me your phone so Adam and I can listen to the voicemail?"

You nodded and handed Adam your phone. He pressed play and you watched as his jaw clenched as he was listening to it.

"Shit," he muttered once he was done. "We need you to come to the district with us. Just for safety."

"Can you give me a minute?" you asked. "I- I'm in my pajamas and I haven't brushed my teeth and--"

"We'll leave in half an hour, okay?" Hailey asked and you nodded. "While you're getting ready, we'll send the voicemail over to Kim and Kev. Jay's gonna be okay."

"How do you know that?" you almost whispered.

"Because Jay's one of the strongest people I know," she answered. But, in reality, she wasn't sure about that. They had no idea where he was and according to the timestamp on that voicemail, it had been a little over ten hours since he sent it. For all they knew, Jay could be out of Chicago right now. Scratch that, he could be out of Illinois.

***

"When did you get this voicemail?" Hank asked as everyone in Intelligence, minus Jay but including you, were in the bullpen and trying to trace where the call came from.

"Around 11 last night, Boss," Adam answered for you.

"Okay. So it's been almost 11 hours," Voight said.

"I need a break, excuse me," you said and quickly excused yourself to the locker room.

You made your way to the locker room and sat down and leaned against the wall. This couldn't be happening again, not after that crazy borderline sociopathic drug dealer kidnapped Jay a few years ago and Erin went in and saved him. This could not be happening again.

You thought back to the fight last night and something your mom would always say when she was in a fight with one of the boys or when you had thrown a temper tantrum and then had to go to bed.

I'll always tell you I love you because when you walk out that door or go to bed, I'll never know if that was the last chance I had to tell you I love you.

God, if you hadn't argued with Jay, maybe you wouldn't be feeling this way. Obviously, you'd be feeling scared and upset because Jay was missing and no one had any idea where he was, but at least you wouldn't feel guilty like you currently did.

You felt guilty about starting that fight in the first place by bringing it up even though you knew what his answer was going to be. You felt guilty about yelling. But most of all, you felt guilty and you regretted not saying love you when he left...because that might've been the last time you'd have been able to tell that to your big brother who had always been there for you...even when he really didn't want to.

Jay's Nokia flip phone buzzed as he walked out of school. It was his mom.

"Hey, Mom," he greeted.

"Jay Halstead, if you answered your phone while you're driving..." she trailed off, trying to think of a good threat.

"Mom, I didn't. I was talking to some friends about going for tacos tonight, so I just walked out of school a minute ago."

"Oh," she said.

"What oh?" Jay asked. "That sounded like a bad oh, Mom."

"Well, I wish I would've known that before a professor called in sick to give an exam to his students and I agreed to pick up the extra hours."

"What are you talking about?"

"I can't bring Y/N to the dentist. And I thought since you weren't busy, you could. I also may or not have promised her that she could go to Build-A-Bear after to get a new outfit for Beary because she's so scared."

"Mom," Jay groaned.

"I know, I'm sorry. But, how about this: you do this for me, and I'll extend your curfew by two hours on Friday and Saturday."

"Three," Jay countered.

"Two." Amelia Halstead stood strong.

"Three."

"Two and a half."

"Deal," Jay agreed.

"Thank you. I'll see you tonight. Love you."

"Love you, too."

***

"No," you whined as Jay told you that you had to leave after he walked you home from school later. "I don't wanna go to the dentist. They scary."

"No, they're not," Jay told you. The doctor was what was scary for him with all the needles for the shots. But, the dentist had never bothered him, even when he was a little kid it had never bothered him.

"No!"

"What if I let you bring Beary into the dentist, would you go then?" Jay practically pleaded.

"And you give me chocolate before we leave?"

"If you promise to grab your toothbrush and brush your teeth in the bathroom at the dentist, then yes, I'll give you some chocolate to eat on the way there." Jay was desperate at this point. He knew he shouldn't be giving you everything you wanted, but what were big brothers with a giant age gap for anyway if not to try and spoil his little sister?

"Okay!" You ran off to go grab Beary and your toothbrush and toothpaste while Jay made his way to a high cabinet in the kitchen and grabbed five squares of Dove milk chocolate, three for you and two for him.

In the car, Jay handed you the cholates and you started eating them while you held Beary close to you, trying to gain some comfort out of your favorite stuffed animal.

***

You gripped Jay's hand as you sat and waited for your name to be called. Beary was held in your other hand and you were squeezing him tight against your chest. You had just brushed your teeth like you promised Jay that you would, but you were still utterly terrified.

"Y/N Halstead?" a dental hygienist came out and asked.

You didn't say a word, just held Jay's hand tighter.

"That's you," Jay said gently and with a smile on his face, trying to make you feel less scared.

"No, not me," you told him as you frantically shook your head.

The dental hygienist squatted down in front of you. "Are you Y/N?" You didn't do anything, but Jay must've nodded to confirm that it was indeed you. "And who's this?" she asked as she shook Beary's paw.

"Beary," you said shyly.

"Well, I'm fairly certain that Beary will be with you the entire time. We even have little sunglasses you and he can wear when we shine the really bright light on you to protect both your little eyes. Does that sound good?"

You turned to Jay. "Me and Beary get sunglasses, Jay Jay!"

"I heard! Do you want me to come back with you?"

You thought for a second. "Please come."

Jay laughed. "Okay." He turned to the dental hygienist. "Is that okay?"

"Perfectly fine."

You stood up and held Jay's hand as you walked back into the dentist to get your six-month check-up on your baby teeth.

***

"That wasn't so bad was it?" Jay asked as the two of you walked out to his car after you finished.

"No!" you said as you shook your head. "I even got a pretty bracelet with Belle on it, see?" you exclaimed as you held your hand out to him to show off your yellow bracelet with a charm that had Belle from Beauty and the Beast on it.

Jay acted all surprised and said it was pretty even though he watched as you had picked it out while he had explained to the secretary how your mom would call to schedule your next appointment in six months.

Jay opened his car and made sure you were buckled in and then got in himself and started driving.

"Do you know where we're going?"

You gasped. You had forgotten you got to go to Build-A-Bear after!

"Build-A-Bear!" you yelled. The volume of that yell would've made Jay wince had he not been driving.

"Yup, that's where we're going."

"I think I'm gonna get Beary some new pajamas," you decided.

"What color?"

You held Beary out in front of you. "What color pjs do you want, Beary?" You brought him up to your ear and nodded as he "told" you what color pajamas he wants. "He said blue!"

"Blue pajamas. I'm pretty sure we can find those."

***

Jay and you walked into Build-A-Bear Workshop at the mall and you were met with children running around. To Jay, this was the definition of hell. Except for you, he was fine with you running around, but he really didn't like all the other kids that he had to be careful not to bump into.

"C'mon, Jay Jay!" you told him as you tugged him along to the pajama section.

He allowed himself to be tugged along by you and then you held up almost every single pair of blue pajamas to Beary to see which one was his favorite. He had decided on a pair of light blue pajamas with stars all over them. There was even a cute little hat with a pom-pom on top to go with the pajamas.

Jay paid and then you left with Beary and his brand-new pajamas. You had plans to have him sleep in those pajamas tonight, too.

Unbeknownst to you, Jay hadn't even really wanted to come. The only reason he brought you was that he got his curfew extended. But to you, it was just another fun afternoon with your big brother.

You were startled out of your daydream when you felt a hand on your shoulder. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

Kevin.

"It's fine. I'm fine," you said quickly.

"No, you're not. And that's okay. Hailey and Voight went to see if Jay's where his phone pinged at."

"We fought," you told him.

"You fought?" Kevin asked as he slid down the wall to sit next to you.

"It was stupid. I should've just agreed with him and maybe I wouldn't be feeling like this."

"Like what?"

"Like utter shit." You sighed and ran a hand through your hair. "We were arguing about the BLM protests that were happening tonight. I wanted to go, but he wouldn't let me. The last thing I did was roll my eyes at him, Kev."

The two of you sat in silence for a few moments while Kevin figured out how to comfort you.

"Maybe talking about it will help. What'd you argue about?"

"Just that I wanted to go and he wouldn't let me because he thinks riots will break out. And you and I both know that's not the BLM protesters, that's the counter-protesters. But, he thinks I'll get hurt. I also think it's because he's a cop, so he feels like I'm protesting him, but I'm not. I'm protesting the system."

Kevin nodded. "I get it. Believe me, I do. I live it every day."

"How do you do it?" you asked. "Be an activist and a cop at the same time?"

"Just try and do the right thing with the information you have. And, explain that you're protesting the system and the bad apples, not the police force as a whole."

"I tried. But Jay doesn't think I have a right to protest because I've never had a bad experience with a cop." Which was a lie, but you weren't ready to talk about that just yet.

"Did he say that exactly?" Kevin asked.

"No, but, he asked me if a cop has ever illegally pulled me over."

Kevin nodded. "I know Jay and I know he would never say that you didn't have the right protest. He fought for that right. He mention anything else?"

"That tear gas hurts."

"I think he just wanted to keep you safe, same thing I'd do for Jordan and Vanessa."

"He sounded like he changed his mind on his voicemail, though. He thought that maybe if you were going, then he'd let me go...at least, that's what it sounded like."

Kevin nodded. "All I can say is that until we found Jay, I'm not going to one. Getting your brother is my first priority and it's the first priority of everyone in this unit."

"My first priority, too."

"Kev!" Adam yelled as he banged on the door. "You in there?"

"Yeah, bro! What's up?" Kevin asked.

"We need you to meet with someone!"

***

The hours passed and with each of them that did, you got more and more nervous for Jay's safety. You guessed that this is how he felt when you asked if you could go to the protest, knowing that he'd constantly be worrying about you until you came home safely.

"Y/N, we gotta go," Trudy said as she entered the bullpen around 9:30 pm that night.

"Why? What's going on?" you asked as you grabbed your phone and started following her.

"They found Jay."

"Is he okay?" you asked quickly.

"Y/N..."

"No! He can't be dead, Trudy! He can't!" you wailed.

"He's not. But, he has been shot."

You froze. Shot. Jay had been shot.

"He's en route to Chicago Med right now."

"Can you- can you bring me there?"

"That's where we're going right now."

***

"Will!" you yelled as you ran into the ED and saw your oldest brother.

You ran right up to him and hugged him, not caring that he almost dropped his iPad he had been using to chart.

"Whoa, Y/N." He set the iPad down. "Hey, I know. But Crockett's operating on him right now and he's one of the best surgeons in the hospital."

"I thought you were better than him. You need to do the surgery, Will. you need to save Jay!"

"Y/N, I know it sucks, but I'm family. As much as I want to operate on him, I can't legally do that."

You paused and looked up at him. His eyes were slightly red, but he hadn't been bawling the way that you had been.

"Dr. Halstead! Incoming!" Maggie yelled.

"What does she mean?" you asked, still hanging onto him. "You're still working?"

"There's been a ten-car pile-up on the highway. I have to. It's my job."

"But Jay's in surgery!" you yelled as you pulled away from him. "These people are more important to you than your own brother?"

"They aren't but--"

"But you're working anyway instead of waiting to find out what happens to him?"

"I can't do anything to help Jay right now. But I can help all these people who are pouring in."

"Dr. Halstead!" Maggie shouted again.

"I'll be up in a few hours, I promise," Will told you.

***

A few hours had passed and it was now past midnight. Jay was still in surgery. Will was sitting next to you, in a spare pair of clothes he had packed instead of his scrubs that were covered in blood, and you were leaning your head on his shoulder, close to being asleep.

That was until Crockett came out and Will jumped up, causing your head to hit the back of the chair.

"Ow," you mumbled.

"Sorry," Will apologized and then turned back to Crockett. "What's the verdict?"

"He lost a lot of blood," Crockett told the two of you.

"But he's gonna pull through, right?" Will asked what the two of you were both thinking.

"We'll be out of blood soon."

"What do you mean out of blood?" Will asked, taking a step toward the surgeon. "There's no way you can be out of blood!"

"With that pile-up, we can. I'd recommend you go and say your goodbyes and pray for a miracle."

Will put his hands on the back of his head and started pacing the room. Your breath caught in your throat. This could not be happening. Jay couldn't die, he just couldn't.

Crockett started to walk back towards the operating room.

"Wait!" you yelled. You didn't know what had taken over you, but at this moment, you'd do anything to save your brother. You rolled up your sleeve. "Take my blood."

"Y/N," was all Will could manage to get out.

"I'm sorry, Y/N, but there's protocol for that. I'd love to let you do it, but--"

"Fuck protocol!" you yelled, all the anger and sadness and anxiety that had built up over the past fifteen hours exploding at this very moment. "Rush my labs. Or don't even get my labs done at all. I haven't had sex, so I don't have any STDs. I don't have any diseases or deficiencies since I moved in with Jay years ago. My blood type's O-neg, so I'm a universal donor. Take my goddamn blood, Crockett!" You didn't care that all that information was out in the open because you were barely processing what you were saying. The only thing you cared about was making sure that your brother was okay.

"Y/N," Will said as he walked up to you and placed a hand on your shoulder.

"Don't touch me! And you sure as hell don't want to tell me to calm down!"

"Y/N," Will started again as he took his hand off your shoulder. "What Crockett's saying is that it's not ethical for him to do this. He could get fired."

"Where's the paperwork?" you asked as you turned back to Crockett. "I'll sign whatever I have to sign to make sure you aren't liable at all, that I'm donating this of my own free will. You can even take double the amount of blood that you normally do since I'm a universal donor. Just get me the paperwork."

Crockett and Will shared a look.

"I'll go get a nurse to get you the paperwork."

"Wait, no, no, no," Will said as he walked closer to Crockett. "You can't be serious about this!"

"She said she'll sign it."

"But, I have to co-sign it since she's a minor. So, no, you are not donating blood, Y/N. You almost passed out when I drew vials of your blood years ago. You know what's gonna happen if we take two units of blood? You are gonna feel like utter shit."

"Last I checked, I'm 18, so I can sign my own paperwork! God, I'm not a fucking child anymore, Will! I can make my own decisions!" you yelled back. "And if I don't do this, Jay will die. He'll die, Will. So, I'm giving him my blood with or without your support."

***

You sat in a chair, the ones that Will had told you about years ago with the big padded bar thing that came down in front of you in case you passed out. Typically, they'd just have you lay down in a bed, but since they were short on beds and Will told them that you had a history of getting dizzy and nauseous during simple blood draws, they had decided to put you here instead.

"Last chance to back out," Will told you as the nurse tied off your arm with a blue rubber tie and started to rub your arm to get the big vein in your left forearm to show.

"Jay's dying. No way in hell am I backing out."

Will sighed. He knew you were doing the right thing, but he also knew that you were going to feel terrible after, and he hated seeing you like that. "Okay," he said. "I'll stay here until they get the needle in you and then I'll get you some juice and cookies."

"Ready?" Monique asked.

"Ready," you confirmed. You turned to Will and squeezed your eyes shut as the needle pierced your vein. You heard the sound of the machine and knew your blood was going in there, but you didn't want to look. Getting your blood drawn, you could watch. But this, this was just too much blood to see, so you looked at Will.

"Doing okay?" he asked a few minutes later.

"Yeah," you answered because that was the absolute truth: you were feeling just fine.

"Okay, I'm gonna go get you some cookies and juice. I'll get an update on Jay while I'm out there, too."

You nodded and he left the room.

This wasn't so bad.

***

Okay, so you were lying to yourself. You were currently in hell. Giving the blood hadn't been an issue, it was how you felt after you were done giving blood.

You were currently sitting in that same chair, drinking some juice that Will had brought you. He told you that there was still no update on Jay, but that they were sending the blood back to him right now. (They had rushed labs on a small vial of blood that Monique took before you started the donation. The results came back while you were giving blood, and since your blood was clean, you could give it to Jay.) But, God, but you felt absolutely awful.

"You doing okay?" Will asked.

You shook your head and then stopped because it made you dizzy and put your head in your hands. "No," you groaned.

He handed you a glass of water. "Drink a bit of this too and then I'll open your pack of cookies."

"Why do you want me to drink water and not juice?" you asked as you closed your eyes and tried to stop the spinning in your head.

"Because, you're sweating, Short Stack. Need you to stay hydrated."

You took a few sips of water and then went back to your juice. Will handed you your pack of chocolate chip cookies and you started to eat them.

"Mhm," you groaned and laid your head down on the padded bar thing in front of you that kept you from falling out of the chair. "I don't feel so good."

You felt hot and cold at the same time and the world seemed to spin every time you lifted your head up. And, those cookies did not sit well with you.

"How do you feel? What hurts?" Will asked, jumping into doctor mode since Monique wasn't around. Will assured her that he could look after you while you recovered from your blood being donated at twice the normal amount.

"I just feel like shit," you told him, not picking up your head.

"You gotta give me some symptoms. Give me some symptoms and then I can help."

"Mhm, fine." You looked up at him and blinked slowly. "I feel hot and cold and sweaty. And I feel dizzy and nauseous."

"Okay. That's either a vasovagal reaction or from your blood pressure being low or from your  heart rate being slowed down."

"What's that reaction thingy?"

"You don't like blood in general, so a nervous system response can happen, which could explain your reactions. But, your BP could also be low, which could explain all this too. And, it's one in the morning and you haven't slept yet, so tiredness could also be a factor."

"Great," you said sarcastically as you remembered the last time your blood pressure was low.

You had taken some of Jay's medication that he had to ward off his PTSD-induced nightmares after you were involved in a shooting at a house party. The one time you took them without sleeping directly after, you felt almost exactly like this...except without the sweatiness. You just mostly felt dizzy. You had called Will, he came over, and then you ended passing out and he had to get you to Med. Then you were admitted and they got your pressure back up. You were also prescribed sleeping pills which had helped immensely.

Will grabbed a blood pressure cuff from a drawer. "Arm," he told you. You held out your arm and he wrapped the cuff around it and pumped the end of it.

You waited as he looked at the gauge on the blood pressure cuff. Will said one number over another number, which meant nothing to you, but must've meant something to him. You raised your eyebrows, hoping he was going to tell you what those numbers meant in non-medical English terms.

"BP's low, which explains most of the symptoms," he told you.

You took another bite of your cookie and washed it down with some juice, but then immediately after started dry heaving.

Will rushed around and then thrust a pink basin under your mouth.

You took a deep breath after you finally stopped dry heaving about thirty seconds later.

"Better?" Will asked. You shook your head. "I'm going to get you an IV of anti-nausea medication."

You were going to argue with him about how he wasn't working, so he probably couldn't get you that. And, you were fairly certain he couldn't prescribe things to family. But, you felt terrible, so you really don't care if Will was being reckless and borderline unethical/illegal right now.

You nodded and then laid your head back down.

When Will came back, he thought you were asleep, but when you heard footsteps, you looked up.

"Alright," he began as he assembled the IV. "Last poke of the day, I promise."

"After this can I take a nap in the on-call room?" you asked as you held your arm out to him once again.

"You know I can't let you do that." Will tied a blue band around your arm and started rubbing it to get a vein in the inside of your elbow. Then, he noticed your pale and sweaty face. "Fine. Hopefully, Goodwin won't fire me after this. But I have a good reason. Turn so you don't see the needle."

You did and closed your eyes. You felt the poke and squeezed your eyes shut, but then it subsided and you felt that weird feeling of the medicine going straight into your veins. God, you hoped this worked.

You hoped Jay would survive because you didn't just go through all that for nothing.

***

You slowly opened your eyes as you felt someone shaking your shoulder. "No," you groaned as you turned to face the other side of the bed.

But then you remembered where you were: the doctors on-call room because Jay had been shot. Maybe it was Will waking you up to tell you--

"Short Stack, wake up. Jay's awake."

That got you wide awake.

You snapped your eyes open, rolled over, and jumped out of bed.

"I take it you're feeling better?" Will asked.

"Sleep helps. Let's go!"

Will quickly led you out of the room and through some hallways and up a few flights of stairs to Jay's recovery room.

He was currently talking to Hailey.

"Jay!" you exclaimed as you burst into the room to see him with a sling and see Hailey helping him with his jacket.

"Hey, Short Stack," he greeted and then turned his attention back to Hailey. "Sorry, what were you saying?"

"Uh, just that I'm glad you're back," she told him. "I'll give you some time with your siblings." She turned her attention to Will. "Oh, and the things you told me to tell Kim to get are in that corner." She pointed to the left front corner of the room. "Bye, guys." She waved and then left.

You gave Jay a huge hug and tried to avoid his arm that was in a sling. "Don't you ever do that again, you hear me?" you told him seriously and then looked up at him with tears in your eyes.

Jay chuckled. "I'll try not to."

"You better do more than try." You went back to leaning your head against his chest as tears soaked his t-shirt.

"Hey, hey, don't cry," he soothed. "I'm okay. I'm fine, Y/N."

"I was so scared. The last thing we would've done was argue. I'm so sorry. I should never have asked to go to those protests. I know you were just trying to protect me--"

"Hey, it's okay for you to have your own opinions and views. It's just gonna take me a while to get used to you being an adult now and not that little sister who would always hold my hand and beg to go to Build-A-Bear."

"Speaking of Build-A-Bear," Will started and then walked over to the corner of the room and picked up two boxes. They were white boxes with dark blue designs on them. You knew those boxes: they were what the workers put new bears in when a kid came and bought one. You let go of Jay. Will peeked into one of the holes. "This one's for you." He handed Jay a box. "And this one's for you." He handed you the other box.

"You got us Build-A-Bears?" you asked as you raised an eyebrow.

"Just open the boxes."

You did and laughed when you saw Beary in the box, dressed in a hospital gown and white little bunny slippers. Your brothers were not kidding when they said they'd get one for you.

Jay laughed as he opened his. His Build-A-Bear was a light blue color and it also had on a hospital gown as well as a sling on one arm. The bear also had on a policeman cap. "Oh, man," Jay said as he continued laughing.

"Press the right paw," Will told him and he did, causing Ruzek's voice to float through the room.

Stop getting kidnapped. Glad you're okay, though.

You started laughing hysterically at this point.

"One more thing," Will said as he walked over to the counter and pulled out a marker and two hospital bracelets. On one he wrote Beary Halstead. "Jay, what are you naming your bear?" Will asked.

"I gotta name it?"

"Um, it's not an it. It's a he or a she...could be a they, too," you said.

"Fine. I gotta name him?"

"Yes," Will told him.

Jay groaned. "Fine. Blue."

"Boo! That's boring," you said.

He groaned again. "Detective Blue. There. Better?"

"Better," you confirmed.

Will wrote Det. Blue Halstead on the other hospital band. Then, he handed Beary's to you and Detective Blue's to Jay.

"I cannot believe you," Jay said.

"I can," Will laughed. "Now put it on him. Just like Y/N's doing with Beary."

Jay reluctantly put it on Detective Blue's arm. But then he realized something. "Wait, why does Beary have a hospital gown if Y/N wasn't in the hospital?"

"Yeah, about that..." you trailed off.

Jay cocked his head to the side. "What did you do this time?"

"Other than save your life, I got nauseous and Will had to give me anti-nausea medication," you explained.

"Wait, back up. You saved my life? How?" Jay asked as he looked between you and Will.

"She essentially cussed at Crockett until she got what she wanted," Will said nonchalantly.

"Which was...?" Jay pried.

"Giving you blood because the hospital was out because of a car accident. If she wouldn't have given you blood..." Will trailed off, not wanting to say the words.

"I'd be dead," Jay practically whispered.

"Yeah," Will confirmed, his voice at about the same volume as Jay's.

Jay felt himself getting choked up as he pulled you in for another hug. "Thank you."

"I know you'd do the same for me."

"In a heartbeat, Short Stack. In a heartbeat."

You stayed like that until Will went ahead and broke the comfortable silence that had fallen over the three of you.

"I hate to break this up, but there's something else I need to tell you guys," Will said.

You and Jay both turned to him and you let yourself out of Jay's embrace. "Which is?" you asked.

"Voight gave Jay two weeks furlough to recover and I talked Goodwin into giving me two weeks vacation--"

"How in the hell did you do that?" Jay asked.

"Let's just say I'm going to be working Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year's Eve, and New Year's Day. But that's beside the point. We have two weeks of vacation time."

"You do know I work right?" you asked.

"At a coffee shop, not at a big kid job," Will said. "And, I had Kim and Adam stop in there on their way to get the bears. They explained the situation and your work gave you two weeks off. Adam said he may have had to flash his badge, but that's beside the point."

"And you took vacation because...?" you asked.

"We need to make sure Jay relaxes and there's so many protests-turned-riots happening right now that we should probably get out of here."

"You do know it's not the peaceful protesters starting those, right? It's counter-protesters and other people who are racist bigots and people who decided they have no other choice but to be violent," you said, making your views known once again.

"I'm very much aware, Y/N. But, no matter who started it, people were running from tear gas and burning buildings last night."

"Alright, back on topic," Jay started, not wanting to have another argument like he had two days ago with you. "Where are we going?"

"I figured Wisconsin would be a good choice."

***

"It's my turn to pick the music," you whined as Will looked for another song on your long drive to Wisconsin.

"I'm the oldest, so I get control of it," Will argued.

"No, you've controlled it for the last three hours. I've had to listen to nineties hip-hop for that long. My eardrums are gonna bleed. Please make him give the aux, Jay."

"Dude, just give her the aux, and then she'll be quiet. Remember, she likes early 2000s pop-punk and 2000s stuff in general. We'll probably know most of it."

Will reluctantly handed you the aux. "Thank you. And, just to remind you two, I'm a big fan of Taylor Swift's first few albums and 5 Seconds of Summer."

You clicked play on Take What You Want by One OK Rock featuring 5 Seconds of Summer. You queued up some more songs by 5 Seconds of Summer and two by Taylor Swift, just to mess with your brothers, and then you added songs they would know like All the Small Things by Blink-182, Check Yes, Juliet by We The Kings, Dear Maria, Count Me In by All Time Low, and Ocean Avenue by Yellowcard.

By the time Dear Maria, Count Me In started playing, all three of you were jamming out, which caused Jay to forget to put his blinker on when he changed lanes...and there was a cop right there in the emergency turnaround.

Jay heard and saw the sirens behind him and slowed down. He knew the drill from pulling people over on his days on patrol. Now that he was in Intelligence, he practically just ripped the criminals out of their cars and handcuffed them against the side of their (usually stolen) car.

He got out his license and registration, along with his badge because he did have his service weapon with him. He'd be damned not bringing it with him in this day and age...and sometimes there were coyotes and he and Will didn't know if the old hunting rifle at the cabin that your grandpa used to use even had ammunition in and if there was even any ammunition at the cabin.

Jay rolled down his window as the officer walked up to him.

Your hands started to sweat and your heart started to race as you remembered your last encounter with an officer that you didn't know.

You were driving home from the library late at night after studying for a biology exam. And no, the library wasn't an excuse for going out and partying. You genuinely had gone to the library and had had a great and very focused study session for a few hours.

All of a sudden, you saw flashing lights and heard sirens. You turned down your music. You looked in your rear-view mirror and saw that the cop was right on your tail. He turned off his sirens and then turned them on and off quickly.

You were the one getting pulled over.

You pulled off to the side of the road and then rolled down your window.

"License and registration," the officer told you. He looked young, maybe a rookie.

"What's the problem officer?" you asked. Jay always told you that you had a right to know why you had been pulled over.

"You were going three miles over the speed limit, did you know that?"

"I don't recall how fast I was driving." Jay always told you never to admit to speeding because then you could fight the ticket if you ended up getting one.

"License and registration, please," he repeated.

"Reaching into my glove compartment and moving some CDs to get my registration," you narrated and then handed the registration to the officer. "Reaching over to my passenger seat to grab my purse which has my license in it...unzipping my purse...reaching in for my license." You handed him your license.

He ran your information and then came back to the window. "I'm sorry, Miss, but I have to give you a ticket."

You furrowed your eyebrows. For three miles over the speed limit? No fucking way was this happening.

"Uh," was all you could say.

"But, there is something you can do to get out of this ticket. You help me out, I help you out."

"I- I don't understand," you stuttered.

He looked down and you followed where he was looking and cupping himself with the hand that wasn't holding your license and registration.

"I- I..."

"Or I can just up this speeding ticket to going twenty miles over it. Say there was an open container in the car, too," he said.

You had no idea what to say. You couldn't risk getting your insurance upped and getting a minor in possession charge. You'd never be allowed to drive again!

But, there's no way you'd do this. You couldn't. But he was so much bigger than you that he could hold you down with one hand tied behind his back.

He placed his hand on the door handle. "You have three seconds to make your decision. One...Two..."

"My brother's Jay Halstead! Badge number 51163! His Sergeant's Hank Voight!" Your voice trembled as you yelled that and you were close to tears.

He looked back down at your license. It did say Y/N Halstead on it. He handed you back your license and registration. "Have a nice night."

Then, he walked back to his patrol car, got in, turned off the sirens, and drove off. You were so scared that you didn't even look to see what his last name or badge number was.

Once you had stayed pulled over for a good couple of minutes to make sure that the cop was nowhere in sight, you started driving again. You stopped at a drive-thru and got yourself a chocolate flurry with Oreos. Then, you sat in the parking lot with your hands still shaking and your heart still racing as you ate and started to cry. You cried for almost half an hour and waited there for another fifteen minutes so your eyes wouldn't be as puffy when you got home because you didn't want Jay asking questions.

"Y/N, you good?" Jay asked, taking you out of your thoughts.

"Yeah, yeah," you said quickly...almost too quickly. "Why?"

"Will just asked if you wanted to go back because we missed a song and you didn't answer."

"Yeah, I can do that." You quickly went back to the previous song and tried to sing with as much happiness as you did previously. But, you didn't get the image of that night or the feeling of dread out of your stomach for another hour.

***

You woke up the next morning very well-rested. The boys had taken the loft and the two twin beds that were up there and you got to take your mom and dad's old room because you were the only girl, so they said it was only fair that you got the bedroom.

You heard the dripping of water and got out of bed and then padded down the hall and to the kitchen. Jay was standing there in pajama pants and a t-shirt. (Thank God he wasn't shirtless for once in the morning. Your brothers really needed to learn how to put shirts on when they walked out of their rooms in the morning...and maybe by you telling them to put a shirt on all the time, you training them had finally paid off.) He drummed his fingers on the counter while he waited for the coffee to be done.

"Morning," you said.

He turned around. "Good morning. Shocked you're awake. It's only 8 am."

"And I'm shocked you haven't been up for two hours," you retorted.

"Oh, I've been up for an hour, just been reading upstairs. Will's not up yet, though."

"He always sleeps late when he doesn't have to work though, doesn't he?"

"Pretty much. We've made breakfast plans before and he's missed them because he was sleeping."

The timer went off on the coffee pot, alerting you that it was finished. Jay started to pour his in a tumbler. He held out a tumbler to you. You raised an eyebrow, silently wondering why he wasn't pouring it into a mug.

"I was gonna go for a morning canoe ride. You can come along if you want. Wouldn't want hot coffee spilling all over us," he told you.

"Did you bring creamer?" you asked.

"Irish cream creamer, just for you."

You reached into the fridge and grabbed the creamer.

"So, canoe ride?" Jay asked.

"Sure."

He poured coffee into a tumbler for you and then slid it to you to put your desired amount of creamer in.

***

Twenty minutes later, you were starting out in the canoe. You told Jay there was no way in hell that you'd be doing the rowing. He told you that he could only row with one arm because of his sling, so you'd have to do the other side. Skeptically, you started rowing. Jay told you that you'd be fine, just to follow his instructions.

Fifteen minutes later, when you were out in the middle of the lake, facing the forests of Wisconsin, he stopped.

"Why'd you stop?" you asked.

He picked up his tumbler of coffee off the floor of the canoe. "We need to talk."

"About what?" you asked as you picked up yours as well and held it with both hands.

"About your reaction last night when I got pulled over. You freaked. I need to know why."

"I- I didn't freak. I was just tired," you lied.

"You had quite the amount of energy right before that," he quipped.

"It's nothing."

"Y/N, I'm not letting this go. Is it because of the protests and riots and because of all the media coverage and those few bad apple cops and, I guess the system, that you're seeing that's making you nervous?"

"No, it's not that."

"Then what is it?"

"You're not going to let this go are you?" you asked.

"I will stay in this canoe in the middle of the lake until you tell me what is going on, Y/N Halstead."

"You wouldn't."

Jay shrugged with the arm that wasn't currently in a sling. "Try me."

You sighed. "Just don't be mad that I didn't tell you sooner, okay?"

"I won't. You have my word on that."

"So, a little over a month ago I was driving home from the library..."

***

When you finished, you were in tears. "Did you get a last name? Badge number?" Jay asked as he rubbed circles on your back with his good hand.

You sniffled. "N- No. I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. Nothing at all."

"If I wouldn't have said- said your name...He had his hand on my door handle! And he was so much bigger than me. I'm sorry!"

You turned and buried your face in his chest. "Y/N, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"I should've told you right away, though! But you just had that really rough case and I didn't want to put too much on your shoulders and--"

"Y/N, I need you to take a deep breath. You need to breathe. This was not your fault. None of it was."

You calmed your breathing and just sat there, silent tears streaming down your face.

"That's why I wanted to go to the protests," you said after a few minutes. "Because I've actually had a bad experience with a cop."

"Which should've never happened in the first place."

"I was so scared," you whispered.

Jay just hugged you tighter as he thought about how strong his little sister was. You had given blood to save his life even though you knew you'd feel terrible after and you hadn't told him about this horrible cop--which he would kick this cop's ass the minute the got back to Chicago--because you didn't want him to have too much on his plate after that terrible case where he put an innocent man in jail and got him killed...which was the main reason he had been shot.

"When we get back to the cabin, I'll try and call Voight. I don't know if I'll have service, though."

"Why?" you asked.

"I'm gonna have him look up who was on their beat near you that night so he can go interrogate people on my behalf. Probably best he does it and not me." Because Jay knew that the minute he saw that cop, he wouldn't be able to hold himself back.

You nodded.

"Hey, cheer up, kid. We're here for two weeks, away from everything. Away from the city and everything that goes on there. And I can promise you that that cop will get what's coming to him, whether that be losing his job or going to jail or prison."

"Do I have to tell Will? Or can you tell him? I really don't want to talk about this again."

"I can do it," Jay answered. "Speaking of Will, if he's not up when we get back, what do we say we wake him up with some cold lake water?"

"Like dump it on him?" you asked as you widened your eyes. Jay nodded. "No, that's mean. Then he'll have to wait for his sheets to dry out and they'll smell the entire time."

"We have spare sheets and blankets in the closet."

"Fine, let's do it. But just so you know, I'm telling him that it was your idea and I also have a lock on my bedroom door here, which will make it harder for him to sneak in and dump water on me."

"I will be sleeping in your room tonight," Jay joked.

"Nope. It was your idea, so you're gonna have to live with Will's payback."

Those two weeks were filled with laughter, pranks, board games, corn hole, swimming, fishing (well, you read either in the canoe or on the dock while the boys fished), and just spending time with each other. You were glad that Will had the bright idea to take two weeks up here...even though he got drenched in cold lake water the first morning by you and Jay.

A/N: I got a request from @ La_lectrice_33 on wattpad for Y/N going to the dentist, so I hope you liked that little scene! I also got a request from an anon on here about Jay and Will's reactions to her growing up, so I put that in here, too. Thank you for over 23k reads! I won't be posting until this Sunday (August 1) when I start posting AUs for AU-gust. Please remember to like/reblog and comment because I love seeing those like/reblog notifications pop up and love reading your comments and asks! As always, if you would like to be added to my tag list, just tell me and I’ll add you! Finally, like my imagines? Buy me a coffee (only $1 through Paypal and other currencies can be used) here: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/Kayela

taglist:  @theambracer88  @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27  @anotherfan07  @thexplosivegirl @dreamingwithlens @xoxmariaxox @onechicago18 @iamasimpingh0e @i-like-sparkly-things  @herecomesthewriterwitch  @liampayne88

[mypoisonedvine]

The Kind of Girl You Take Home to Mom | Andy Barber x reader (part 1)

summary: Jacob was finally taking his college girlfriend home to meet his family.  how was she, a sheltered Harvard girl, supposed to know not to trust the famous, respected lawyer who just so happened to be his father?

word count: 3.5k

warnings: smut (dub con??), age gap, infidelity, fingering, dirty talk, a lil choking, wedding ring kink, lots of awkward conversations lmao

@donutloverxo @evnscvll @ballyhoobarnes​

“They’re gonna love you,” Jacob beamed at you as you buckled into the passenger seat.

“I dunno, Jake, I’m not usually a parent’s favorite…” you mumbled nervously, adjusting to be comfortable for the drive.  It wasn’t that long of a trip— just from your dorm at Harvard to the southern suburbs of Boston; your discomfort was a lot more psychosomatic, in fact.  Isn’t it normal to be afraid to meet your boyfriend’s parents?

“Well, my parents are pretty chill,” he assured you.  “Besides, what’s not to like?”

You still felt a little dizzy as you tried to prepare yourself for a weekend with them.  You’d hoped Jacob would just have you guys meet at lunch or something but nope, he insisted that you come with him the next time he visited over a three-day weekend and you’d agreed cause you didn’t know how to say no.  Now here you were, practicing ‘Hi, it’s so nice to meet you!’ in your head as if you were going to forget how to speak English in the next fifteen minutes.  

Honestly, with how nervous you were, it was plausible.

The sun through the trees cast flashing light and shadows through your window as you watched the scenery roll by.  Something by Bon Iver was playing through the car speakers, but the mumbled lyrics were lost to your distracted mind.  You’d heard a decent amount about his parents through him— his dad was apparently quite the bigshot lawyer— but you had no idea how much they knew about you.  You hoped he talked about you a lot but you also sort of hoped he didn’t, so that you’d have a clean slate to start with.

“Your destination is on the left,” Google Maps informed you both.

“There it is,” Jacob smiled as he lifted a hand from the wheel to point to the house.  It was nice, really nice, and a little tinge of jealousy hit you.  

You took a deep breath and gave him a weak smile as you prepared to meet Mr. and Mrs. Barber.

~

You went through the motions of every great introduction to people who need to like you.  So nice to meet you, I’ve heard great things, you have a lovely home, all that good stuff.  Laurie, his mom, was bubbly and kind, and insisted you not call her Mrs. Barber because it made her feel old, apparently; Mr. Barber was a little more stern but still seemed warm enough.

After some basic hand-shaking and introductions, Laurie had explained that she was making dinner.  You offered to help but she insisted that you wouldn’t lift a finger while staying in her home.  That sure did sound nice, though you felt guilty.

So, while Jacob unpacked your and his stuff in the guest bedroom, and while Laurie was cooking, you and Mr. Barber were stuck together in the living room.

“We’ve been hearing a lot about you,” he informed you.

“Oh, r-really?” you stammered.  “Only good things, I hope.”

“Only great things,” he assured.  

You nodded, not sure what to say but realizing the conversation was going to peter out quickly…

“You can relax,” he encouraged with a smile, “we’re not giving you the third-degree or anything.”

You let out a little laugh of relief, trying to keep from looking too rigid.  “I’m sorry,” you sighed, “I just really want to make a good impression.”

“You already have,” he assured you.  “You’re a natural.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” you laughed nervously, “I’ve never met anybody’s parents before.  I mean, of course I’ve met people’s parents, just not a boyfriend’s or anything— that’s not usually my sort of thing…”

His eyes went a little wide, and you mirrored it as you realized the implication.  “Oh, I don’t mean— it’s not like I only do hook-ups or something, I don’t do that, I just meant I’ve never really had a serious relationship before—” oh god, is that a bad thing to say?  Does it make me seem like I’m too immature for Jacob; or does he not think we’re serious?  “I mean, it’s not like we’re serious serious, it’s not— we haven’t really— we’re not thinking that far ahead, we’re young and all that…” God, even Jacob and I haven’t had this conversation, why am I having it with his father?!

“Well, whatever it is that you two are, he seems to care for you greatly.”

“That’s… good to hear,” you sighed, hoping you could just keep your mouth shut for a few minutes.  Awkward silence was leagues better than this.

“The weather’s great so I thought we could sit outside for dinner!” Laurie suggested.  

“Sounds lovely, honey,” Mr. Barber nodded, jumping off of the couch at any excuse to get out of this conversation.  You resisted the urge to hide your face in your hands.

Their patio was spacious and covered in meticulously-gardened plants, with a glass table that had already been set with four place settings.  You helped carry out some of the food and took your seat in the wrought iron chair.

“Do you want any wine, sweetie?” Laurie offered as she turned towards you, bottle in hand.

“Oh, I’m not twenty-one yet,” you explained quickly.

“Well, yeah,” Laurie raised an eyebrow, “but we’re not so sheltered, we know what college kids get up to— just a glass won’t hurt.”

“You’re kind to offer,” you relented, “but I don’t drink.”

“Really?” Laurie questioned, looking a little incredulous.

“Really,” Jacob butted in.  He laughed when his mother gave him a look of surprise.  “Yeah, I know, she’s like, the one person at Harvard who’s sober.”

“Finally, a little respect for the law in this house,” Mr. Barber added as he stepped out onto the patio.  

“You want a glass, honey?” she asked him, seeming to ignore his apparent distaste for her offering alcohol to you.

“Sure,” he nodded, taking a seat.

“So,” Mr. Barber addressed you as he sat down, “what are you majoring in?”

“English,” you answered with a nervous smile.

“And what do you wanna do with that?”

“Whatever lets me read as much as majoring in it allows me to,” you chuckled.

“Do you think you’ll go to graduate school, get a Master’s?” he pressed.

“Actually,” Jacob interjected, “she’s thinking of going for a doctorate.”

Mr. Barber turned back to you with an impressed expression.  “Wow!  Smart girl.”

Something about him calling you ‘girl’ made you feel yourself blush slightly, and shift in your seat.  Or maybe it was the praise.  Still, for some reason it coming from him felt wrong but wonderful at the same time.  “Um, I suppose so…”

It continued on like that for a while; he and Laurie asked you questions, you and Jacob told a few stories.  Mr. Barber managed to get you to open up a little and not be so worried about him judging you or assessing you all the time.  But then again, you’d heard he was a bigshot lawyer so he probably knew how to get people comfortable and talking so he could go in for the kill.

Sometimes you caught him looking at you like he was about to go in for that kill at any moment.

~

“Do you think it went okay?” you asked with faux nonchalance as you slipped into bed, watching Jacob brush his teeth in front of the mirror.

“Okay?  I fink it went greaf!” he responded, the toothbrush in his mouth making his words difficult to parse.

You laughed a little at his silliness, though you were glad to hear he thought it was a successful day.

“And they don’t mind us sharing a bed?”

Jacob snorted with a quick laugh before spitting out his toothpaste into the sink.  “They’re not conservative like that,” he dismissed with a shake of his head.  “I mean, we’re boyfriend and girlfriend, it’s normal for us to share a bed.”

You nodded because it was true, but you also found yourself twisting a piece of your hair between three fingers; you wondered if his parents assumed that you two did everything that was normal for boyfriends and girlfriends to do… and, as always, you wondered if Jacob was growing impatient with you in that regard.  He always said that he didn’t mind and was going to wait as long as you needed, but it was still hard to believe.  Sometimes you just wished he would break up with you so that he wouldn’t have to deal with celibacy and you wouldn’t have to deal with the guilt.

“You ready for bed?” he prompted, tearing you from your train of thought as he sat down on the other side of the bed.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” you agreed with a nod, laying down completely and plugging in your phone.

Jacob switched off his bedside lamp, and you were ready to fall asleep, but he quickly pulled you into him.

Oh, yes, cuddling.  This was normal, this was expected; you should feel relaxed right now, and not nervous and confused.  You tried to force yourself to, but it didn’t really work. 

He hummed contentedly, kissing behind your ear.  “Goodnight, honeybun.”

Another girl would love this kind of attention.  Any girl should.  You smiled, but it was fake.  “Goodnight, Jake,” you replied quietly.  You really did like him, you never doubted that.  But as he drifted to sleep beside you and you took in the surroundings of Jacob’s old room— renovated and updated, but still feeling like the graveyard of a childhood— you couldn’t help but question why you were here at all when you knew, deep down, that this relationship was missing something that couldn’t be found.

~

You woke up for no particularly good reason in the middle of the night, a habit of yours.  Squinting as you lifted up and unlocked your phone, you read the clock: 2:16 a.m.

You sighed and realized that you weren’t going to be able to get back to sleep, at least for a while.  

Peeling Jacob’s limp arm off of you and slipping out from underneath the comforter, you tiptoed out of the bedroom and shut the door behind you.

The streetlights cast faint yellow light into the kitchen, enough that you could see somewhat; enough that you didn’t stub your toe, thankfully. 

You did your best to open the refrigerator quietly as you searched for a snack.  I could make a sandwich but that’s a bit too much food.  There’s so much weird diet food in here, is that Mr. or Mrs. Barber’s?  A glass of juice probably isn’t enough.  Yogurt?  Hmm, maybe…   

“Burning the midnight oil?” the deep and smooth voice of Mr. Barber came from behind you.

You jumped a little as you spun around, finding him standing in the entryway to the kitchen, wearing pajamas and a smug little smile.  You let go of the door and it slowly closed itself; Mr. Barber turned on a dim light and you were able to see him a little better.

“I think we’re a little bit past midnight, sir,” you chuckled softly.

He seemed slightly uncomfortable with the title, shifting awkwardly and clearing his throat.

“Did I wake you up?” you asked, concerned.

“No, no, not at all,” he shook his head.  “I haven’t been sleeping so well recently.  A finger of scotch usually helps…”

For some reason, him telling you this felt too intimate.  You cleared your throat nervously as he poured the aforementioned drink into a crystal glass.

“You really don’t drink?” Andy asked you suddenly, and you laughed a little.

“I don’t know why it’s so hard for you guys to believe!” you replied.

“No, no, I believe you…” he trailed off.  “I guess I’m just surprised because Jacob seems really into the party scene.  You two seem sort of opposite in a lot of ways.”

“Yeah, we are,” you admitted.  “I think it works for us.”

“You keep him honest?” 

“I keep him from failing out,” you scoffed, though as soon as you’d said it, you instantly regretted your brutal honesty.

“Ah, I get it,” Andy smirked.  “He’s partying while you’re back in the dorm studying enough for the both of you.”

“That’s not—”

“Don’t lie to me,” he instructed, a little more stern than you anticipated.  “With what I do for a living, I’ve learned to spot a lie from a mile away.”

You swallowed, thinking this was getting a bit out of hand already.  “Well, I ought to get back to bed,” you realized, “and… so should you.”

As you stood up and started to walk past him, he suddenly reached out and grabbed your arm, stopping you.

“Mr. Barber, I—”

“Call me Andy,” he encouraged, stepping closer until you were pressed against the wall and he was pressed against you, finally releasing your arm but leaving you just as trapped.  This close up, your height difference was staggering.

“O-okay, Andy, I don’t—”

“Has he fucked you yet?” 

The question made your eyes shoot wide open and your stomach burn with embarrassment.  How could he ask you something like that?  But he seemed cool and collected, staring down at you as he took the last sip of his scotch and set the glass aside.

“I think as his father, I have a right to know,” he added firmly.

“I… we don’t… he and I aren’t…”

“So, no?”

You nodded quickly.

“Well, why not?  Is there something wrong with him?”

No, there’s nothing wrong with him at all, and I hate that about him because I should love him but I don’t.  “N-no!”

He looked you up and down quickly before responding.  “I can’t imagine how he keeps his hands off you…”

You knew you shouldn’t be enjoying this kind of attention, especially from your boyfriend’s father, but something about his gaze made shivers erupt in its wake.  You looked away and forced yourself to remember everything great about Jacob.

“He’s been very patient with me,” you explained shakily.  “He knows I’m not ready.”

“Not ready?”

“To be with someone… that way…”

You shivered when his fingers began to toy with the hem of your nightgown.  “This is nice,” he complimented softly.

“Um, thank you…”

“You’re a very beautiful girl,” he informed you, leaning in a little closer.

“I—” you began, but he was already about to kiss you.  You almost melted into it, you almost let your eyes flutter shut as you tilted your head; thankfully, you stopped yourself at the last second, pushing your hands against his chest.  He was strong enough that your protest would’ve been useless if he hadn’t chosen to stop in the moment.

“Andy, your wife…” you explained weakly.

“She hasn’t touched me in years,” he grimaced.  “She just wants my money, and the appearance of the perfect family.  You have no idea what it’s like to lie next to someone every night and still be completely alone.”

For a split second, Jacob flashed in your mind and you wondered if you did have an idea.  

“I’m… sorry to hear that…” you mumbled.  “But I can’t— you can’t—”

He lifted your chin with one finger, and you looked up at him with wide doe eyes.  “Is he treating you right, sweetheart?  Is he everything you deserve?  Don’t lie to me…”

“He’s…” you whispered shakily, unsure how to respond, “he’s great.”

Andy chuckled incredulously, seemingly not believing your answer.  “Listen, he’s my son; I love him, obviously.  But I know his flaws better than anyone.  And even though I like to think he’s smarter than a lot of boys his age, they’re all the same when it comes to one thing: girls.”

“I think he’s pretty smart in that regard,” you defended.

“If he was smart, he would be taking you to nice places, buying you nice things, treating you right.  If he was smart, he would’ve fucked you already.  If he was smart,” he smirked a little, “he wouldn’t have left you alone with me.”

His hand slipped under the bottom of your nightgown, grabbing your thigh.

“Andy!” you yelped, but he lifted a finger to his mouth with a soft shushing noise.

“Don’t wanna wake anybody, now do you?”

I kinda do though… you thought to yourself.

His fingers travelled higher and higher, nearly brushing against the edge of your panties; you shivered, wondering if you should stop him, and if so, how.

Your hands were still resting on his chest from when you’d tried to push him away, but instead of fighting back all they did was clench and pull at the soft cotton of his t-shirt as his pointer finger hooked into your underwear and pulled them down.

The thick, calloused pad of his finger swiped through your folds, and you bit your lip.  Something about it being the middle of the night, about the forbidden nature of it all, about the way his gaze burned right through you made your entire body so sensitive.  He found your clit instantly, and barely had to touch it to get you bucking your hips into his touch; you only somewhat managed to suppress your gasp.

He leaned in to kiss you again, but this time it actually came to fruition and his lips were soft but determined against your own.  You reciprocated eagerly, eliciting a little smile from him as you both realized how bad you wanted this even when you shouldn’t.  The moment his tongue slipped into your mouth was also the moment his middle finger slid into your tight and pulsing channel.  You moaned with surprise and it mixed with his own soft groans while your tongues intermingled.

A second finger joined his first, stretching your walls and making you nearly bite down on his lip in your mouth.  He smiled and twisted them within you, pushing right against a spot that made your knees weak, while his thumb stretched out to keep circling around your clit.

He broke the kiss to watch your face, admiring the way your brows furrowed together, and your eyes fluttered shut, and your swollen lip caught between your teeth.  Your head fell back against the wall, the effort of supporting it suddenly seeming too much, and it caused you to look up at him and make some awkward yet sensual eye contact.

“Has he ever made you come like this?” he whispered, jealousy apparent in his tone.  You shook your head ‘no.’  “Has anyone ever made you come like this?”  You shook your head again.  “Fuck,” he groaned.  “Including yourself?”

You nodded and he laughed a little, stooping down to kiss your neck.  “Always such a good girl, huh?”

His tone shifted as realization crossed over his face.  “Baby… am I the first thing that’s ever been inside you?”

You bit your lip, feeling a bit embarrassed, and nodded again.

He groaned and pressed his hips forward into your hip; the hard shape of his cock against you made you gasp.  “Feel what you do to me?” he smirked.  “God, you’re too fuckin’ perfect…”

“A-Andy, ‘m close,” you whimpered 

“Come on my fingers, sweet girl,” he encouraged.  “I wanna see how pretty you look when you let go.”

It felt like a wave of sensation was about to crash over you, faster than you knew how to handle it.  You reached down and tried to push him away by the forearm, an instinctive way to run from the intensity of the feeling as it started to make your eyes roll back and your toes go numb.  But he was too strong; your fighting was useless as his fingers kept fucking into you and pressing against your constricting walls.

“No, baby, you can take it,” he hissed.  “Come for me, sweetheart.”

Just as you were sure you were about to scream, his other hand clapped over your mouth.  You could feel the hard shape of his wedding ring against your lips and just as guilt hit you, so did your orgasm.  Your knees went weak; you would’ve fallen if it weren’t for the hand inside you all but holding you up.  

Your moans were muffled into his calloused palm as pleasure rippled through you.  You felt your channel grip his fingers at the same time as a gush of arousal coated his hand and even began to drip down to his arm.

Your breathing slowly stabilized, and Andy trusted you enough to finally take his hand away.  He pulled his fingers out of you and brought them to his lips, licking them with a smirk.  “You taste like heaven, honey,” he praised.  “Go ahead, clean off my fingers,” he instructed as he pressed the fingers into your mouth; it was already hanging slack from exhaustion.  You closed your lips and sucked on his fingers, moaning at your own taste and at the way his skin felt on your tongue.

Once he was apparently satisfied with your work, the hand in your mouth moved back and instead wrapped around your neck as you whimpered.

“Tomorrow,” he growled against your ear.  “I’m gonna get you alone, and we’re gonna finish this.”

You were a little too busy panting to respond to that.  Honestly, you had expected that you would have some post-nut clarity at this point, or even just be satisfied once you’d reached your peak.  But apparently not; even still coming down from it, you already wanted more.  With a sigh, you realized that you were already completely addicted to Andy Barber, and you were going to come back for more as soon as you could.

“Tomorrow,” you agreed in a raspy whisper.

(part 2) // (part 3)

[lighthousegod]

Yall know that rejection sensitive dysphoria thing that comes along with adhd sometimes? Yeah everyone talks about that in the context of thinking your friends secretly hate you bc of little things like change in tone and stuff, and that is a big part of it for sure, but can we talk about like. The fuckin dentist.

Like, I have pretty shit teeth, but it's not for lack of trying. I mean, yeah, I could floss more, but the point is I do make an effort to keep them cavity free. And yet, every time I go to the dentist, lo and behold: cavities. Never bad ones, never even on the tops of my teeth. Just these little ones that get in between my back teeth because they're so close together. Now, normally you'd just say "hey, what can ya do. Bad teeth, bad genetics, I'll just floss more because mine are more prone to cavities. The end." Except, no, not the end. ESPECIALLY not the end when the dentist acts like you did it on purpose. I went to an adult big kid dentist today instead of the pediatric one bc I'm old now, and they were SO much nicer to me. Didnt try to insult me or make backhanded comments about my hygiene. In fact, the ensured me that my hygiene was GOOD. I still feel shitty for having cavities, but way less now that I know they weren't disgusted by and/or pitying me the entire time. The pediatric dentist would literally be so rude like. Girl if I had perfect teeth you'd be out of a job get away from me 🤚 But in all seriousness, it like. Really fucks me up when people say things like "You have x amount of cavities. Really really REALLY floss. Always brush." Cause yknow, at the kid dentist they assume I'm a kid and I just suck at hygiene. And yeah, I'm still feeling kinda bad from today's visit, but they made sure I knew that they were small cavities, not caused by me being incredibly irresponsible or unhygienic, NOT MY FAULT. At least, not completely.

So yeah, adhd makes the dentist kinda hard. And seems like in places where they should be more kind and aware of things like RSD, they are less instead.

I got a new toothbrush tho less goooo

[the-scandalorian]

Tempered Glass: Chapter 5

Pairing: Din Djarin x Female Reader Rating: M (will become explicit) Word Count: 6.4k Warnings: canon rewrite, slow burn, canon-typical violence, sexual harassment/unwanted sexual advances, cursing, sexy thoughts, pining Summary: When you’re caught in a firefight with a bounty hunter and the Crest is damaged, you and Mando stop on Tatooine to find a job. A shadow of your past catches up with you. Notes: Sorry not sorry for making Toro even worse than he already is. Taglist: @bbdoyouloveme @beskarhearts @dincrypt @dunderr @honey-hi​ @just-me-and-my-obsessions00 @mbpokemonrulez @red-leaders @speakerforthedead0 @theflightytemptressadventure @zoemariefit

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Image from The Art of Star Wars: The Mandalorian

After leaving Sorgan, you and Mando chose a second “backwater skughole” several systems away as your next destination. Mando set the nav, and the automated voice of the computer informed you that the trip would take almost five days. The thought of spending five days confined to the Crest was not appealing, but you knew it was important to keep your stops as remote as possible.

Time was a functionally meaningless concept in space anyways, hours and days bleeding together. Without the usual environmental cues to govern your circadian rhythm, you had to rely on a schedule to maintain some semblance of normalcy, keeping alarms on your chrono to remind you when to sleep. Mando, on the other hand, seemed so completely accustomed to this slippery sense of time that he needed no reminders; this was natural for him.

If you hadn’t already seen some of his skin, you might actually think he was a droid. Aside from his hard metal exterior, the most compelling piece of evidence to support this theory was the fact that he didn’t seem to need much sleep. He disappeared into his bunk for maybe four or five hours a day, plus twenty minutes here or there to eat. You suspected he settled into a half-asleep, half-awake hibernation mode when he sat in the pilot’s seat for hours at a time without moving. Once, he jolted so violently when the child sneezed that he had to catch him by his collar before he slid off his knee.

His relationship with the kid, though, was achingly, heartwarmingly, vulnerably human.

You lived for the glimpses of their bond—the way Mando would remove a single pauldron so he could rest the child’s head on his shoulder to lull him to sleep, whispering to him as he swayed gently. When the kid was restless and energetic from being cooped up, Mando would roll the little silver sphere from a control in the cockpit along the floor of the hull for him to chase. For a generally impatient man, his patience for the child seemed almost inexhaustible; he would hold him and pat his back endlessly while he wailed his way through particularly bad tantrums.

You collected these precious moments and held them close to your heart, unwittingly creating a catalog of comfort that you’d return to later. They weren’t necessarily your moments to claim, as a visitor in their world, but you treasured them nonetheless.

***

You were out of colored contacts. You could only wear each pair continuously for a month, and your current pair was due to be switched out any day. The morning you threw them away, Mando stopped you as you passed him in the hull with a light hand on your shoulder. The kid was tucked in his other arm.

He stepped in front of you, just inches away from your chest, tilting his helmet down to look at you. You looked up to meet his gaze, puzzled. He cocked his head, a silent question.

Not for the first time, you wondered about the color of his eyes.

You held your breath, unsure of what he was going to do.

He said nothing but brought his gloved hand up to your face, running this thumb along the crest of your cheek—so lightly, the leather was barely touching you. The tender gesture brought goose bumps to your arms, and your heart stuttered in your chest.

The kid reached up a tiny hand toward your other cheek, mirroring Mando’s movement. He babbled quietly, breaking the tense silence. You flicked your eyes down to watch him but remained still, not wanting to disrupt the spell of the moment. The baby wiggled his fingers and whined when he realized he couldn’t reach you. You smiled.

You looked back up into Mando’s visor. You wanted so badly to reach out and touch him back, to pull him closer, but you let fear keep you rooted to the spot.

To your astonishment, he dipped his helmet, as if he was going to lean his forehead against yours. He was inches from your face—you could see your surprise reflected in his visor and hear his steady breathing through the modulator. But Mando seemed to change his mind mid-gesture, and the moment was over before you knew it. He straightened, dropped his hand, nodded stiffly, and stepped past you. The child let out a frustrated cry in protest.

Without the kid’s lingering whines, you might have thought you imagined the whole thing.

Little by little, you were revealing your real self to the Mandalorian, placing your safety in his hands. This would have been harder to stomach if you weren’t getting pieces of him in return. Spending this much time in such close quarters with someone—even someone as closed off as Mando—was enough to get to know them fairly well.

For instance, you weren’t quite fluent, but you were getting really good at reading his body language. He relied on his armor to mask his intentions with strangers, and he wasn’t accustomed to people spending extended amounts of time with him—time to learn his patterns and tells. Over time, it became apparent just how many minute things there were to unpack: subtle tensions in his back and shoulders, clenching of his fists, tapping of his fingers, the lean in his hips, audible inhales or exhales, the tilt of his helmet. Plus, there were nuanced flavors of each movement: a sassy head tilt, an angry head tilt, a confused head tilt. Soon enough, you’d be able to create a dictionary of the Mandalorian’s body language. 

It was strange to think that you’d only been with him for a few weeks, and you might be the only person in the galaxy who could read him so well.

Something else you’d come to learn about Mando was that he was very particular about where his things were kept. This made sense—he’d clearly been living alone for years, if not decades. Of course someone with such a nomadic, unsettled lifestyle would want to carefully control what little in his environment that he could, but his compulsive organization was next level.

You came to this conclusion after you scooted his toothbrush and toothpaste over just slightly in the med cabinet to make a space for yours. The next morning, you opened the cabinet to find his things exactly where they had been before you’d moved them. You looked down to see that yours were sitting precariously on the edge of the sink, waiting to fall to the floor at the first sign of turbulence. Seriously?

That inspired you to devise a fun game—well, it was fun for you. You were pretty sure Mando hated it, though to his credit, he didn’t say anything about it for several days. Every day, you’d move one of his items just slightly to see if he’d notice and move it back. So far, he’d caught every tiny adjustment. He even reoriented his bar of soap when you moved it so it sat slightly off-kilter in its dish in the shower. He hadn’t even showered yet that day.

After three days, he finally cracked.

He was digging through a storage compartment, huffing dramatically though his modulator as he searched for something.

“I can’t imagine you’ve lost something,” you said, from where you were sitting on a crate sharing a ration pack with the kid, who was perched on your lap. “Not with how terrifyingly organized you are.”

“Yeah, well, that was only true before you started moving my stuff around.” 

You grinned. “I was wondering when you were going to say something.”

“I was wondering when you were going to stop,” he huffed, but you detected the lightest trace of amusement in his tone.

“I haven’t actually moved anything,” you laughed. “Just... adjusted.”

He harrumphed, still digging around in the box.

The kid chittered and reached toward your hand for more food. You gave him another piece.

“If you let me leave my toothbrush and toothpaste in the med cabinet, I’ll stop.”

He looked up. “That’s it?”

“I’m a reasonable woman.”

“Deal.”

When you went to brush your teeth that night, one of the three shelves in the med cabinet had been completely cleared for you.

As you slowly began to insinuate yourself into Mando and the kid’s life, the guilt of not telling him about the bounty on your head started to weigh heavier on your mind. He deserved to know, but you couldn’t imagine him letting you stay if he found out. Why would he assume any extra risk? I’ll tell him soon. We probably won’t be together much longer anyways.

***

“I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold.”

The unfamiliar voice of the bounty hunter echoed over the com in the cockpit. A ship was hot on your tail, landing several shots that rattled the Crest violently. The child, who was strapped into the seat beside you, seemed to enjoy the excitement of the chase, arms raised and giggling. Mando maneuvered the Crest quickly and deftly, so the pursuer was suddenly directly in front of the viewport.

“That’s my line,” he said dramatically, as he pulled the trigger and obliterated the ship in his sights.

Despite the fact that your heart was pounding in your chest, you couldn’t help but let out an exasperated laugh at that. 

The chase had been short-lived, but the hunter had managed to inflict some serious damage. Alarms beeped and warning lights flashed along the console.

“Losing fuel,” said Mando. He was working hastily, his hands flying from one control to the next. He was trying to address several warning alarms at once.

“You work on that. I got this,” you said, unbuckling.

You stood next to him, attending to the controls in front of you.

“What are—Don’t do that,” he said, “Stop. I need to—”

He didn’t finish his sentence when he realized you were doing exactly what needed to be done to stabilize the ship.

“I thought you said you worked in programming.”

“I did. Mostly avionics.”

The second thruster sputtered and died. The cockpit went dark. All of the usual mechanical sounds that the ship made whirred to a halt. Mando turned in surprise, looking around. He clicked a few buttons. Nothing happened.

The child giggled from his seat.

“I’ll get it.” You walked to the back of the cockpit and wrenched open a panel to do a manual reset of the controls. Some of the lights came back on. Mando flicked several switches, and the displays came alive.

Together, you got the ship in good enough shape to limp to a nearby planet. Luckily, you were already close to Tatooine. The Razor Crest rattled alarmingly as it cleared the atmosphere, and Mando landed the ship with an unceremonious clunk in a bay in Mos Eisley.

Mando left the now sleeping baby in his bunk, despite your objections. That never works. He walked down the ramp to haggle with the mechanic.

Peli was a gruff woman, sassy and straightforward. You liked her right away. Mando deserved the sass Peli dished out, considering he had begun their interaction by shooting at her pit droids when they tried to approach the Crest.

He really hates droids.

You and Mando headed to the cantina to inquire about work. As soon as the ship went dead, you’d both known you’d need to pull a job to pay to fix the damage because there was no way the Crest was making it to your destination in its current state.

You trailed a few steps behind him, watching the intimidating way he stalked down the sandy street, his cape billowing behind him. He seemed less scary now that you knew he secretly had a sense of humor and an occasional flair for the dramatic. And that he once let you sleep on his shoulder. And tied your shoe for you.

When you entered the cantina, you shivered from the abrupt change in temperature. Outside the twin suns beat down; inside the dark cantina, it was cool.

Mando strode up to the bar. You followed him, taking in your surroundings.

“Hey, droid. I’m a hunter. I’m looking for some work.”

“Unfortunately, the Bounty Guild no longer operates from Tatooine,” replied the droid in a stilted voice.

“It doesn’t have to be Guild work,” you clarified.

“I am afraid that does not improve your situation, at least by my calculation,” said the droid, continuing to wipe down the surface of the bar with a rag.

“Think again, tin can,” interrupted a smug voice behind you. You and Mando turned.

A young man, his legs propped brazenly on the table in front of him, continued, “If you’re looking for work, have a seat, my friends.” He gestured to the seats across from him.

“Name’s Toro, Toro Calican. Come on, relax.” He beckoned for you to join him again.

You and Mando exchanged a look and walked over to where he was seated.

Toro swung his legs off the table and slapped a bounty puck down in front of him as you slid into the booth and Mando followed.

“Picked up this bounty punk before I left the Mid Rim,” Toro explained. The hazy image of a woman with dark hair hovered over the puck. “Fennec Shand, an Assassin. Heard she’s been on the run ever since the New Republic put all her employers in lockdown.”

Toro had thick brown hair and dark eyes, a boyish face despite the scruff of five-o’clock shadow on his jaw. He couldn’t be older than 25.

“I’ve heard the name,” said Mando.

You nodded beside him. Fennec Shand was a legend. Having been chased by enough hunters, you were familiar with the big players.

“Yeah, well, I followed this tracking fob here. Now the positional data suggests she’s headed out beyond the Dune Sea. Should be an easy job.” He shrugged.

This kid clearly has no idea what he’s doing.

“Well, good luck with that,” said Mando, standing up. You stayed where you were, relaxed against the back of the booth.

“Wait, wait, wait, hey. I thought you needed work?” Toro looked from Mando to you, confused.

“How long you been with the Guild?” asked Mando.

“Long enough,” Toro spat unconvincingly.

“Clearly not. Fennec Shand is an elite mercenary. She made her name killing for all the top crime syndicates, including the Hutts. If you go after her, you won’t make it past sunrise.”

Mando looked at you and jerked his head to signal that it was time to go. He started to walk away. You stayed seated, saying nothing.

Toro looked at you, pleading. You nodded toward Mando: “You’ll have to convince him.”

Toro scrambled after him. Mando turned to face him, and Toro had to look up to meet his visor.

“This is my first job,” he admitted in a strained voice. “You guys can keep the money, all of it. I just need this job to get into the Guild. I can’t do it alone.”

Mando looked to you. You smiled knowingly, and he let out a sigh and nodded.

The man cannot say no to someone who needs help.

Toro was visibly relieved.

“Meet us at hangar three-five in half an hour. Bring three speeder bikes and give me the tracking fob,” instructed Mando, holding out a hand.

Toro’s shoulders pulled together. Someone doesn’t want to let go of the fob.

Without any warning, he smashed the fob on the wall. It sparked.

Mando gave Toro his angry head tilt.

“Don’t worry, got it all memorized,” assured Toro, tapping a finger on his temple.

“Half an hour,” growled Mando.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me now, guys,” Toro said triumphantly, turning to look at you.

Mando pushed past Toro and walked back to the booth, leaning down toward you. “I am not that predictable,” he muttered in a low, irritated voice.

“You really are,” you smiled up at him. “I’ll meet you at the hangar in 20. I want real food.”

He nodded and left.

Toro looked very pleased with himself, grinning at you.

“You better go track down those bikes,” you reminded him, gesturing for a droid to come take your order.

Toro ignored your advice. Instead, he looked you up and down in a way that made your skin crawl and slid back into the booth across from you.

“You know what? I have an even better idea. Me and you can take Fennec ourselves. You look like a girl who can handle herself. Let’s ditch that rusty bucket right now and do this together. Fewer people to split the reward.” His eyes sparkled.

Is he fucking serious?

You already weren’t a huge fan of Toro and his cocky attitude, but the minute he called you “girl” like that, your regard for him plummeted. What little patience you had for this kid was wearing thin.

“Not interested.”

The droid came over, and you placed your order.

Toro, still looking at you expectantly, scooted around the table to sit next to you, and you moved in the opposite direction to maintain the distance between you.

“Mando is old, you know? I don’t know if you can tell, but I can. That’s an old man under that shiny armor. You look like you need someone younger to keep up with you.” He winked conspiratorially, as if the two of you were sharing a mutual joke.

You watched him through narrowed eyes, a sour feeling settling in your stomach.

He was clearly terrible at reading people because he responded to your disgusted look by reaching over to run a heavy hand along the inside of your thigh. He barely made it an inch past your knee when you ripped his hand off your leg, tightening your fingers around his wrist until your nails dug into his skin.

“Touch me again and lose a hand,” you spat at him, releasing him and pushing up from the table. You wrapped your fingers around the hilt of the blade at your hip.

“Whoa, whoa! I was just being friendly, sweetheart,” he said loudly, holding his hands up in mock surrender. He looked around at the other patrons as if seeking outside confirmation that you were the one who was being unreasonable in this situation.

“You should leave.”

“I was obviously kidding about ditching Mando,” said Toro, shaking his head. “You really need to lighten up.” He didn’t even have the decency to look abashed.

You spared him a biting response, fixing him with a glare instead.

“I’ll go find those bikes.” He stood to leave, purposefully brushing past your shoulder as he went.

***

After finishing your meal, you stalked out of the cantina and back to the terminal to find Mando.

He was sitting at the top of the ramp of the Crest fiddling with an open control panel in the wall. He looked up to nod at you when he heard you approach.

“I don’t like that kid, Mando. I don’t trust him. I don’t think we should do this.” You stopped in front of him and put your hands on your hips.

“I know. He’s inexperienced, but he’s harmless.”

“No, that’s what I’m saying—he’s not harmless.”

“What did he say to you?” Mando continued working on the open control panel, only vaguely listening to you.

“He tried to talk me into ditching you and teaming up with him, so we didn’t have to split the reward three ways... He also hit on me.” You added the last part as an afterthought and grimaced at the memory of his gross hand on your thigh.

His head snapped up to look at you. “He—what?”

You looked at him, waiting for him to verbalize a more coherent question. You weren’t sure which part of what you’d shared horrified him the most.

“I—what—uh, yeah, I know... I don’t trust him either,” he continued, “but there are two of us and only one of him. We need the credits—and we’ll get the full reward, like he agreed, whether he likes it or not. We’re not going to find many other jobs here, and I don’t think he’s smart enough to pull anything.”

“I guess,” you shrugged. Toro doesn’t seem capable of critical thinking, let alone concocting and carrying out an elaborate scheme. The bounty was too high and other jobs too scarce to resist.

“We’ll keep a close eye on him. Let’s just finish this job quickly, and then you, me, and the kid can move on.”

“Okay,” you agreed, reluctantly. The way he emphasized the fact that you and him and the kid were a team was an obvious attempt to quell your worries. And it did. Mostly. It was a little startling how well he knew you already.

“Where’s the baby?” you asked, suddenly realizing the door to his bunk was open, and it was empty.

“He left the ship, and Peli found him. She agreed to take care of him while we do this job.”

Again, here he is, trusting a complete stranger.

“I told you he never stays put,” you scowled.

“Don’t worry, Peli already gave me an earful about how much I don’t know about kids.” He sounded defeated, so you decided not to pile on.

“You’re doing a good job, you know. The kid really loves you.”

He seemed surprised by your sincerity, his shoulders pulling back slightly. “I’m not, but thanks.”

It hurt your heart a little to hear him say that. 

***

When you left the terminal fifteen minutes later, Toro was outside, leaning against one of two speeder bikes with a cocky smile on his face.

Peli, who was holding the kid and arguing with Mando about payment, stood in the doorway to see you off. You caught the curious look that Toro gave the baby in Peli’s arms.

“Hey, what do you think? Not too shabby, huh? I could only track down two. You guys will have to share,” Toro said.

You and Mando looked at each other. Mando started to inspect the bike closest to you. Before he could beat you to it, you threw a leg over the speeder bike and sat down at the front of the seat.

“What are you doing?” Mando asked you.

“Driving,” you said, shrugging and reaching into your bag. You pulled on a pair of googles and wrapped a scarf around your nose and mouth. You secured your bag on the back of the bike.

When you noticed that Mando had made no move to join you, you looked at him and tipped your head back toward the seat behind you. “Let’s go.”

You could tell by the resigned drop in his shoulders that he knew it would be more work to try to convince you to scoot back than was worth it. He climbed on the speeder behind you, crowding you forward and reaching his long arms around you to grab the controls.

“Nope. Nice try,” you said, slapping his gloved hands away and grasping the controls yourself.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around your middle. You hoped he didn’t notice the goose bumps that appeared on your neck when he touched you. It was way too warm out under the two blazing suns to explain them away.

You jerked your wrists down and leaned forward to take off across the open sand, not waiting for Toro to mount his speeder.

“What the hell??” he yelled after you.

He caught up after a few moments.

After awhile, you let yourself relax back against Mando’s chest, and you smiled to yourself when he tightened his arms around you. 

The suns slipped lower in the sky as you coasted over the shifting surface of the Dune Sea.

***

You and Toro slowed your bikes to a halt when Mando released your waist to hold up a fist.

“What’s going on?” asked Toro.

“Look. Up ahead,” The rasp of Mando’s modulator in your ear and the concurrent rumble in his chest made you shiver, so you hastily hopped off the bike.

Mando stayed seated while you and Toro each pulled out a set of binocs to scan the landscape. Neither of you had the heightened vision that Mando’s helmet afforded him.

Through your binocs, you spotted two Tusken raiders standing beside two very hairy Banthas a short distance ahead. You lowered your binocs and scanned the immediate area.

“Tusken raiders. I heard the locals talking about this filth,” spat Toro, who was still watching them through his binocs.

You stepped back toward the bike as two Tuskens crested the hill you were on. Mando reached out a hand to grab your wrist, squeezing gently. You looked at him, and he nodded reassuringly.

“Tuskens think they’re the locals,” Mando said coolly, turning back to Toro. “Everyone else is just trespassing.”

“Well, whatever they call themselves, they best keep their distance,” Toro remarked.

“Yeah? Why don’t you tell them yourself?” asked Mando.

You grinned. There’s that flair for the dramatic.

Toro turned, and the two Tuskens screeched at him. You laughed at the way Toro positively jumped. Mando stood, raising a calming hand toward Toro, and told him to relax. You followed him as he approached the Tuskens and started gesturing to them, clearly proficient in their sign-based language.

Mando’s hands moved smoothly though deft, controlled movements. You looked down and bit your lip, trying to focus on twisting the toe of your boot back and forth in the sand to prevent your mind from wandering somewhere less appropriate.

“What are you doing?” Toro asked Mando.

“Negotiating.”

The Tuskens signed back to Mando.

“What’s going on?” asked Toro.

“We need passage across their land.”

“What did you think he meant by “negotiating”?” you said, raising your eyebrows at Toro.

“Let me see your binocs,” said Mando, holding out a hand to Toro.

“Why?”

Mando said nothing but kept his hand out, waiting. The two suns, now low in the sky, reflected brightly off his helmet. Toro handed them over begrudgingly, and Mando tossed them to the Tuskens. The Tuskens looked satisfied with their payment.

“He—hey! What? Those were brand new!” stuttered Toro in surprise.

“Yeah? They were.” Mando stalked away and remounted the speeder bike. You followed him.

And there’s that sense of humor. It’s sassy.

“You couldn’t have taken hers instead?” Toro asked, nodding at you.

“Nope,” said Mando.

You smiled sweetly at Toro as Mando scooted back in the seat and let you climb on in front of him.

***

The next time you stopped more abruptly. Mando raised his fist and barked, “Get down!”

You and Mando sprang off your bike in unison and crouched down. Toro, struggling to keep up with what was happening, fumbled with his goggles before following suit.

The three of you made your way to the edge of the dune in front of you, staying low. You set yourselves up on your stomachs at the top of the rise. Not far below, a dewback trudged forward slowly with what looked like a dead rider trailing after it, a rein wrapped around the figure’s limp ankle.

“Is that her? Is that the target?” asked Toro.

“I don’t know... I’ll go.” He looked at you to say, “You two cover me.”

You nodded.

He looked at Toro to emphasize, “Stay down.”

You and Toro pulled out your blasters. Mando ran hurriedly down the dune, his own blaster drawn. He approached the dewback slowly with a reassuring, “Whoa, whoa.”

Mando flipped over the prone body.

“So, is it her? Is she dead?” yelled Toro.

Mando turned, “It’s another bounty hunter.”

Toro turned to look at you. “He’s not planning to keep all that stuff for himself, right? I at least want that blaster.”

You rolled your eyes at him. “Can you shut up for one second?”

He gave you a disbelieving look. You ignored him and focused your attention back on Mando.

Mando started to rise, turning suddenly to yell, “GET DOWN!” as blaster fire hit his pauldron, knocking him to the ground.

“Mando!” you yelled.

He scrambled back to his feet and broke into a run. He crested the hill as a second shot screamed after him. Again, it hit him in the beskar, sound reverberating off the metal. He threw himself down with a grunt, rolling towards you in a shower of sand.

“Are you okay? You didn’t get hit, right?” You reached out towards him.

“Yeah, it hit me in the beskar. And at that range, the beskar held up.” He sounded winded.

“What happened?” asked Toro, as Mando set himself back up on the crest of the hill, lying between you and Toro.

“Sniper bolt. Only an MK-modified rifle could make that shot.”

“Fennec,” you said. Mando nodded.

“Did you see where the shot came from?” he asked you.

“Yeah, from that ridge.” You pointed.

“Okay, we’re gonna wait until dark.”

“Well, what if she escapes?” asked Toro from where he was resting on his elbows on the other side of Mando.

“She’s got a good position,” you said. “She’s not moving.”

“Exactly,” agreed Mando. “She’ll wait for us to make the first move.”

Mando rolled over and stood only part of the way up, offering a hand down to you. You grasped it and got to your feet. You both hunched low to keep yourselves behind the protective swell of the dune.

“We’re gonna rest. You take the first watch. Stay low,” Mando said to Toro.

You followed Mando back to the bikes.

“Be extra careful. I don’t like you being out here with no beskar,” he said to you, more quietly.

“I will.” 

Your stomach clenched at the way Mando’s voice warmed when he was talking only to you. He spoke to Toro in a clipped tone, like he was scolding an unruly kid. He spoke to you like an equal, a partner. You couldn’t pinpoint when he’d started talking to you this way, but it had shifted recently. It was a tone you’d heard him use with the kid and with Omera. Something that felt a lot like hope sparked in your chest at this realization.

He slumped down against your speeder bike and reached up to pull you down next to him. You leaned back against the bike next to him, your body flush with his, and let your cheek fall against his shoulder.

After a few moments, you could hear a light snore rasping through his modulator. Apparently this man can fall asleep anywhere.

Eventually, you fell into a light sleep, not trusting Toro enough to sleep deeply.

***

You woke to Toro saying, “Time to ride, guys.”

“Come on, wake up!”

You opened your eyes and lifted your head. It was dark out; the last lavender traces of the sunset were disappearing along the horizon. Mando was still beside you, his chest rising and falling rhythmically.

“Look at him, asleep on the job. I told you he was an old man,” leered Toro.

You felt the cadence of Mando’s breathing shift beside you.

“You’re right. He’s ancient—basically dead already,” you quipped, patting Mando on the knee to signal that you knew he was awake.

Toro couldn’t tell if you were mocking him or joking with him, so he just looked at you, slack-jawed, trying to parse it out.

“Not quite,” Mando said, jabbing you in the ribs lightly with his elbow. Toro started at Mando’s words.

You stood, this time extending a hand down to help Mando up. It was more of a symbolic gesture than anything else—he weighed way more with that armor on than you could ever lift. Nonetheless, he took your hand as he hauled himself to his feet.

“We’re going to ride as fast as we can towards those rocks,” explained Mando, pointing to where Fennec was presumably perched.

“That’s your plan?” scoffed Toro. “She’ll snipe us right off the bikes.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t seem remember the amazing plan that you came up with?” you sniped, raising your hands in disbelief.

Mando snickered, a short rasp through the modulator, and in answer to Toro’s question, he tossed a small item his way then handed something to you.

“They’re flash charges. You two will alternate shots. It’ll blind any scope temporarily. Combine that with our speed, and we got a chance.”

You looked down at the charge in your hand, noting the button that would set it off.

“A chance?!” blurted Toro.

You bit back a scathing retort, turning back to your bike.

“Hey, you wanted this. Get ready,” replied Mando, tipping his helmet at Toro.

Mando stepped close to you, lowering his voice. “Let me sit in front this time. In case she manages to make any shots.”

You nodded in agreement, appreciating his protective nature.

You mounted the bike behind him and wrapped your arms around his middle, the charge grasped tightly in your right hand. Mando wrenched his wrists down, and your speeder bike took off, with Toro in your wake.

Mando pushed the bike as fast as it could possibly go, launching it over the swells of sand. You gripped him tighter, and the wind whipped the edges of his cape against your legs.

Apparently Fennec spotted you easily from her vantage point on the cliff because she started her assault immediately, firing at Toro’s speeder first.

Mando reached one hand down for a moment to squeeze your arm, and you understood. Holding his waist tightly with your left arm, you reached your right one up into the air to set off the charge. It went off with a screech. Even through your closed eyelids, you registered the blinding flash of light.

Fennec recovered fairly quickly. She resumed firing only moments after the light dissipated. Mando weaved the bike in a serpentine pattern to avoid the shots.

He turned to Toro and yelled, “NOW!”

Toro let off a charge. Another searing light rippled across the landscape.

After a moment, Fennec fired again, her aim becoming more precise as you drew closer to the cliff. This time, she didn’t miss. A direct shot screamed across the sand and hit the front of your speeder bike. You let go of Mando in the jolt of the impact, and you both flew over the top of the bike and landed in the sand.

Ouch.

Toro zoomed past, looking back for only a second. You didn’t like how easily he left you both behind, but logically, you knew that someone needed to get to Fennec as soon as possible.

You stayed prone on the sand, lifting just your head to see where Mando had fallen a few feet ahead of you. You were relieved when he sprang to his feet and ran back towards you. Without any warning, he lowered himself down over you to protect you from any more incoming fire. He braced himself on his elbows and knees so his body was pressed against yours, but he wasn’t crushing you with the combined weight of his body and armor.

“You okay?” he asked, his voice right behind your ear.

“Yeah.” Your face was pressed against the warm sand. “You?”

“Good. You got the charge?”

You handed it up to him. Luckily, you’d managed to hold onto it during the impact. Mando fumbled for a moment, then lifted an arm to set it off.

After the searing light faded and the dark blanket of night returned, another blaster shot landed in the sand a few feet from your head. Mando edged forward and rested his helmet on the sand above your head. You were completely shielded.

“Thanks,” you muttered up to him, slightly self-conscious that this purely protective position was affecting you so much, a slow heat coiling tight in your stomach. His whole body was flush with yours, his breath heavy and fast in your ear, and you could feel the steady rise and fall of his armored chest against your back. The places where he wasn’t covered by beskar pressed warmly against you. Think about anything else.

A shot pinged off his back. Mando tensed and grunted at the impact. You gritted your teeth and focused on burying your fingers in the sand, definitely not thinking about what other things might draw similar sounds from him.

“Alright, I think Toro got to her. Let’s go, but stay behind me,” Mando rasped in your ear, squeezing your shoulder with a gloved hand.

You nodded beneath him, stifling the shiver that was threatening to run up your spine. Think about anything else.

He rolled off you, and you both got to your feet. You breathed a sigh of relief and positioned yourself at his back, both of you drawing your blasters. In the dark, you could see red streaks of blaster fire on the cliff where Fennec had been perched.

“We gotta run,” you yelled, pushing him forward. “Toro wont be able to take her alone, Mando!”

You stayed close behind him, a hand on his lower back, so he knew you were with him.

When you reached the foot of the cliff, you could hear Toro’s groans and Fennec’s grunts, but you couldn’t see them. You and Mando scrambled up the sandy incline that was littered with boulders and crested the cliff right as Fennec wrestled Toro to the ground.

“Nice distraction,” said Mando, training his blaster on Fennec. She reluctantly released Toro from her hold and put her hands up in defeat. You waited, partially concealed behind Mando until you knew she was restrained.

Toro grunted in pain as he stood up slowly.

“Cuff yourself,” Mando ordered Fennec, tossing the cuffs in front of her.

“A Mandalorian. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen one of your kind.” She stood. “Ever been to Nevarro? I hear things didn’t go so well there, but it looks like you got off easy.”

Fuck, just how much has she heard about what went down on Nevarro?

Fennec smiled even wider when you stepped out from behind Mando. There was no avoiding her now. Sure enough, recognition flickered in her eyes.

Uh oh.

“Well, well, well... if it isn’t my favorite bounty,” she drawled, and before you could react, your name—your real name—fell from her lips. “You lead me all over the damn galaxy, sweetheart.”

***

Chapter 6

[bruhlsbees]

paradox burning ; 3/5 || ernst schmidt x fem!reader

gif credit to @/guillermodltoro

summary: the domino effect begins, schmidt and reader are thrown into hot water, mundy's arms shows up at the worst time

pairing: ernst schmidt x fem!reader

word count: 7,502

warnings: major character death (no not reader or ernst), spoilers for the cloverfield paradox, semi-public sex, orgasm denial, dick riding, yeah yeah y'all know what this shit about to be, minors dni, 18+, nsfw

a/n: we are almost done with the series!!!! figured i'd throw in a good smut scene before the angst of the ending - if you haven't heard already there will be a sequel to this (and yes it will be around 13 chapters) hope you enjoy!!!

translations (god i hope these are right):

Желим те - I want you, Волим те - I love you

Watching the clock, you waited until the hour hand clicked in place, the new hour beginning. You had been waiting in your room now for an hour, calming down before deciding that enough was enough and you had work to do. You wouldn’t be sitting in your room for the rest of your time aboard the station. Damn the Commander and damn anyone who thought differently.

Standing up from your bed, you didn’t bother with putting your suit back on as you made your way out of your room, down the hall, and back towards the medbay. Inside was Acosta who seemed to be taking a break from the woman in the wall and working on inventory. You walked in the room, watching as he looked up from his clipboard and towards you, his expression falling.

“Hey, you know the-”

“Acosta, please...I’m fine,” You shrugged and made your way over to the gloves, pulling a pair out before putting them on, “I did what the Commander told me to do and cooled off, I’m not just going to sit in my room forever.”

Acosta didn’t want to be the one to admit it, but he agreed with the Commander. Your mental state was failing the longer you were on board the Cloverfield Station - at this point it was only a guessing game as to when you would snap like Volkov or Schmidt. But Acosta cared for you, looked at you as if you were family, he was worried, but he knew how to talk with you about it.

“Yes, you cooled off...but how are you feeling still?” You opened your mouth to speak before catching Acosta turn and look over his shoulder, “Don’t lie to me, I am a doctor after all.”

You smiled at his joke, rolling your eyes before you sat up on the examination table, shrugging your shoulders. “Honestly? Not great.” Nodding, Acosta turned now and made his way to the examination table you were sitting on, leaning against it beside you.

“I know...you know, when I was looking over files to see who would be a good fit for the medical bay with me, you were always my top choice,” The confession surprised you, your gaze looking over at him as he smiled and nodded, “It’s true...I was always impressed with your work. When the Commander told me about your psychological evaluation and your low score, I didn’t care. You’re a great nurse and that’s what I care about.”

You could feel your eyes watering, but you didn’t care if Acosta saw you cry - it was Acosta after all. The words of encouragement were ones you had heard before, but coming from him, someone who had mentored you the past two years, it meant more than anything.

“We all have our faults, that doesn’t make us bad...what makes us bad is living by those faults and letting that define you.” Feeling his hand on your shoulder, you leaned into his touch before falling into a hug, wrapping your arms around his middle as he did the same to you, holding you close.

He smelled of warmth, bay rum, a father’s embrace. Acosta reminded you deeply of your own father - caring, quiet, and yet at the same time so full of knowledge that his mind alone could make up for the lack of his own words. He knew what to say and when to say it.

Pulling away, your hands rested on his back while you stared at him, smiling before closing your eyes as he leaned it, pressing a gentle kiss to your hairline. “Don’t let the bad thoughts take away from all that you’ve achieved. You’ve done so much just to let your own mind take that away from you.”

Nodding, you brought your knuckles to your eyes and swiped away the tears, letting out a sigh as your mind lulled, your brain desperately trying to focus on what Acosta was saying.

Think of the good stuff, think of what is true.

Looking up, the corners of your mouth twitched as you stared at Acosta. You nodded once, thanking him before watching him pat your knee and get up to go and continue on with his work. You kept your seat on the examination table before getting up to join Acosta in taking marks on inventory.

As you went to open the cabinet that had the medicine for common colds, the doors to the med bay whooshed open, Schmidt and Tam stumbling in with Volkov in their arms. Setting the clipboard down, you rushed over to the examination table that Volkov was now on.

“How long has he been like this?” Acosta asked, pulling out his small light to look over Volkov’s eyes, “What happened?”

“He tried to kill us!” Schmidt rushed, catching his breath as he stood at the end of the examination table beside Tam, motioning towards Volkov as he stayed unconscious on the table. It was the Commander, who must have followed them in, that spoke up next.

“Tam? Why do you have a gun?” He demanded. You hadn’t noticed until you finally looked at Tam, seeing the gun that was

When Tam explained that he had approached them on the X-Deck, threatened them with it, your heart sank. You looked over at Schmidt, a worried expression glazed over your eyes while he shook his head, silently telling you that it was fine and that he would tell you about it later.

“Just lock it away, Tam!” At this point, Mundy and Hamilton were joining the rest of the crew in the medbay, watching as Acosta and yourself looked over Volkov. While Acosta used his flashlight to look down his throat, you pressed your fingers to his wrist, feeling for a pulse.

You tried to focus on finding a pulse, moving your two fingers up and down his wrist. You figured that because he was unconscious, his pulse would be harder to find - evidently he wasn’t as unconscious as you thought to believe because when he suddenly grabbed your wrist, you let out a gasp and stepped back, tugging your wrist out of his grasp and stumbling back, the Commander caught you from falling and kept you pulled back away from Volkov who began to finally spit up blood and violently shake.

“W-What’s happening?” You found yourself asking, although nobody seemed to truly know what the hell was going on, all standing around in shock at the disturbing sight of Volkov. His convulsions grew more rapid before finally his spine snapped up, silence deafening the room as he fell down before being replaced by the sound of his flatline.

You never were a fan of Volkov, but you would be lying to yourself if you said that you were happy to see him gone in such a gruesome matter. You wouldn’t wish that on anyone, not even your worst enemy, not even Volkov.

“No...no.”

Glancing to your right, you frowned at the sight of Mundy, who slowly approached the end of the examination table, looking down at Volkov. Hamilton extended her arm out to console Mundy, but then suddenly out of nowhere, Volkov was at it again, only this time it was one final blow.

The worms that came out of Volkov’s mouth was one thing, but the quantity of the slimy earthworms that erupted from him. They coaxed the floors and your feet like mud, impossible to step away from them as you, like the rest of the crew, began to stomp down on them, desperately trying to get them away and off of you.

When the worms suddenly stopped, lying now on the floor, you leaned against the wall, catching your breath after the incident that just happened. Your eyes glanced at Schmidt who was looking at Tam to see if she was okay. You smiled weakly and looked around the rest of the room, noticing that everyone else seemed to be okay as well.

“Well we found the worms.”

You didn’t know if it was Mundy’s poorly timed joke, the excessive amount of worms on the ground and the guts that were seeped into your shoes, or the horrifying sight of Volkov on the table, but something made your stomach churn, and you followed Hamilton closely as the both of you rushed out of the room, back into your quarters to throw up.

Your body hurled over the toilet, the sudden smell becoming almost unbearable. You quickly flushed the toilet before leaning back to shut the lid of the toilet seat, standing up and sitting now on the toilet while you brushed your teeth, trying your best to get the taste out of your mouth.

Leaning over the sink, you spit out the contents of your mouth, rinsing your toothbrush off before cupping your hand under the sink to collect water, bringing to your lips to intake and swish around your mouth, spitting the water out after a moment.

Making your way out of your bathroom, you wiped the beads of sweat that collected over your forehead off, leaning against the doorway to catch your breath. You kept your eyes closed, taking slow deep breaths in and gently exhaling through your mouth. You stayed this way until you heard your door open and shut.

“What happened? Are you okay?” Your attention shifted from the floor and up in front of you to Schmidt who now held you in an embrace, his hands placed on either side of your face, looking over you to make sure you were fine.

Shaking your head, you leaned forward and buried your face into his neck, hugging him tight as you began to cry.

“Volkov...I-,” You whimpered and clung to his suit tighter, “Ernst, I can’t unsee that. Even when I blink I can see him lying on that table and I don’t think I will ever get that sight out of my mind. What if that was yo-”

“But it wasn’t...it wasn’t! Hey, look at me,” He pulled your head back carefully, his thumbs running along your face as he swiped away your tears, pressing a kiss in between your brows, “I’m right here, okay? I’m not going anywhere. I’m always going to be here.”

At this point he had pulled you back into his arms, cradling your head into his neck as he rocked side to side, his right hand on the back of your head while the other rubbed your back.

“I want to go home, Schmidt...I don’t want to do this anymore. I can’t!” You thought of your family, your small home in the country. You always thought you were trapped in that home, sharing a room with your younger sister until you left for school. But now that you were in space, stuck aboard the ship, you only wished to be back in your room with Mila.

Schmidt’s heart sank, wincing at the sounds of your cries and pleads to return home. He wasn’t sure what to do, how to comfort you in that moment. You couldn’t reach your family, so calling was off the table, all he could do was hold you and listen to you cry. Eventually your sobs stopped and were replaced by faint whimpers that vibrated against his neck.

“I’ll get you home. I promise, I promise you’ll see your family again. But you have to stay strong until then, okay?” Schmidt kissed the top of your head, squeezing you one more time before pulling you back to coax you into your bed, laying you down before getting in beside you.

“You don’t have to-”

“I know, but I want to. I don’t think Tam is in any hurry right now, and neither am I.” You were surprised to hear him put you first - you understood why he never did given your secrecy of relationship and the fact that his role on the station was so important. But even now, after everything, hearing him put you first even for just a few minutes, it made you realize just how much you were in love with him.

You leaned forward and kissed his forehead, cradling his head now close to you as you laid with him. Your fingers running through his hair while his ran along your waist under your shirt. If it weren’t for how exhausted you were, you would have asked him how he was doing.

He wasn’t surprised to see you fall asleep so quickly, given how startling things were today for you. While he watched you sleep, holding onto him as if he were your teddy bear, he knew that he would need to leave you to go and get some work done. Schmidt didn’t want to, but he knew that he had to.

Gently pulling your hands away from him, he moved out from the bed and laid your arms down, watching as you shifted your position to your other side, your back facing him as you now faced the wall. Schmidt smiled and leaned down, pressing a kiss to your cheek before tucking you in, standing back up to turn and exit your room.

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

Evidently you needed sleep. You had hardly done anything that day, but given the circumstances of what went down with Volkov, all you wanted to do was sleep off that nightmare. You were only slightly disappointed to see that Schmidt was no longer with you, assuming that he was back up on the X-Deck with Tam.

Rolling into the pillow beside you, you pressed your face into it, letting out a sigh before intaking the faint scent of Schmidt that lingered onto the pillow from his time sleeping in your room. He smelled like home - happiness, love, and your mother’s baked goods.

Mama, she would love Ernst.

You knew that you needed to stop dwelling on your family. The lost communication signal and being so far away from Earth should have motivated you to want to help more, but instead it made you scared - your mind fleeting instead of fighting.

When the doors to your room opened, the light footsteps rushed in, cutting you off from your thoughts, you frowned and moved your head up from the pillow, your glare softening once you saw Tam.

“Tam? What are you-”

“It’s Schmidt!” She rushed, pointing towards the door. She began talking so fast that you could hardly make out what she was saying.

“Slow down, Tam, what are you saying?” You focused on her words slowly, trying your best to make out what she was telling you in Mandarian before you finally made out what she was telling you. The Commander had taken Schmidt to the airlock; apparently Jensen, the woman from the wall, was accusing him of working with German Intelligence to keep the Shepard offline.

Shooting up from your bed, you shook your head and got up, making your way towards Tam, “No, no that’s not true. Schmidt wouldn’t do that.” Tam nodded her head and sighed, of course she knew that - anyone who had a brain on board knew that Schmidt wasn’t the enemy. Sure he had his moments where his anger got the best of him, making it hard to see how he was any different from Volkov, but he was different, he was good and he wouldn’t betray you like that.

You couldn’t wait any longer, you had to see him. Excusing yourself from your room, you quickly rushed out and down the hall, making your way towards the airlock that was on the other side. Weaving through the halls, you cut the corners sharp, trying to not get caught by anyone and get down to him as quickly as you could.

Finally, after what felt like a dozen mazes you had gone through, you finally reached the airlock. Making your way up to the door, arms crossed with a frown on your face, you watched Schmidt raise his head from his knees, squinting towards you before rolling his eyes, looking the other way.

“Whatever it is you’re here to lecture me on, I’ve heard it already.”

You weren’t surprised by his irritated remark - hell, if you were thrown in isolation, you’d be pretty pissed too. Your mouth twitched into a smile before you shook your head, leaning against the small opening of the door, your forehead pressed against the glass.

“Do you always have to see me as the enemy? Even now, I think it’s safe to say that I’m here as a friend.” You explained, watching as his head slowly turned back towards you, his body language seeming to calm down.

“Just a friend?” He questioned, his own smirk playing at the corner of his mouth.

You smiled and shook your head, your eyes gazing as he stood up and made his way towards the door, leaning forward to mimic your stance, his forehead pressed where your’s would be on the glass.

“More than a friend.” You finally answered, your fingers coming up to rest against the glass, running down where his face sat behind the glass. God you wished you were there with him, to hold him and feel his warm skin against your own.

His fingers raised up to the glass, pressing down where yours sat on the other side, a sigh escaping him - the glass in front of his mouth fogging over.

“I don’t believe them, you know. I know whatever Jensen said was a lie. You wouldn’t do that, Ernst. You’re better than that.” His mouth twitched into a smile and nodded, pulling away from the glass after a moment. He took a step back and stared at you, watching as you frowned, head tilted to the side.

“I wouldn’t say I’m better than that. Now you’re just making me sound like the good guy.” He noted, crossing his arms over his chest. You matched his posture, growing a little annoyed at the sudden lack of faith in himself.

“And aren’t you? You expect me to believe that this was expected of you?” You laughed and shook your head, tears welling in your eyes, “You’re insufferable, you know that? Can’t ever just believe in yourself can you? Always have to live up to what others think of you.”

“Can you blame me? I think it’s fair to say that I’ve had enough and tha-”

“And what?!” You snapped, cutting him off. You dropped your head down for a moment to catch your breath, looking back up at him after a moment. “How do you think I see you? Like the others?”

You took a step towards the window again, staring him down.

“You know what I see? A man who is too stubborn for his own good, who thinks that arguing with everyone to prove a point will get him anywhere,” You paused when you saw his head drop, standing like a child who knows he did something wrong. “I see someone who is too scared to ask someone to just believe them because you’re afraid that nobody will.”

Stopping, you took a deep breath before continuing, “But I also see someone who smart, funny despite your poorly executed jokes, and someone that I lov-”

You cut yourself off quick before the word could come out. Mouth gaped open in shock, you stared ahead at Schmidt who was equally shocked, his head snapped up and staring at you. The tears were now falling from your cheeks, face even redder than before as you shook your head, taking a step back as he took one forward.

“I’m sorry, I-”

“No, wait!”

But you didn’t listen to him. You ignored his pleads for you to come back, to finish what you were about to say. Your chest tightened, your heart hurting as you left the hall, flinching every time his scream for you became louder until finally there was nothing.

When you finally managed to escape the embarrassment of confessing your love at the worst time, you realized that you were down by the medbay. You were pleased to see that Acosta was in there, continuing to work on taking inventory in - the last thing you wanted to be right now was alone.

As you headed inside, his attention pulled from his clipboard and towards you, a weak smile on his face, “You okay?” He asked, noticing your clear discomfort. To him he only knew of Volkov, and how you ran out of the room at the sight of him throwing up the worms, he didn’t know that you were on the brink of tears from your moment with Schmidt.

“I-I think so...maybe, I don’t know,” You sighed and immediately went to work, trying to distract yourself, “I just think everything is finally getting to me. Seeing Volkov like that...I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, not even-” You paused and took a deep breath, closing your eyes before shaking your head.

“It makes you really understand death, how it can come out of nowhere and take anyone, right in front of you,” Your mind went to Schmidt, your family, the rest of the crew on board. Dying was one thing, but to die so horrible and unexpected, that was an entirely different kind of pain. “It makes you wonder about him, what his family must be thinking - if he had any.”

Acosta turned and looked at you, frowning as your back turned to him, continuing to work on your own inventory sheet, “If you live everyday dwelling on the idea of death, you won’t ever enjoy life…” His words paused your work, looking up from the clipboard and turning slightly over to him, watching as he approached you, “What is it that you’re afraid of?”

It took you back, the question. What were you afraid of? Well you were scared of many things - spiders, the dark, and frogs ever since your brother decided to cover you in them when you went camping. But those were silly fears, ones that didn’t eat you away. What you were so afraid of, was losing all your loved ones, to be alone.

“I’m afraid of-” You words fell silent, your breath hitching to your throat as you looked around, finding the confession silly now, “I’m afraid that once we leave the station, I won’t see anyone again. That Ernst will go back home and all of this, all of this was just because of the circumstances we were in.”

And then it hit you - why you were so afraid to tell him. It wasn’t that you were embarrassed or in doubt, you were afraid that he wouldn’t feel the same, that when you told him whatever you two had built over your time on the station would disappear in a flash.

You didn’t realize you were crying until Acosta took the napkin in his pocket and dabbed your cheeks. A weak laugh escaped from you as you shook your head, “It feels like everyday I’m crying more and more.”

“You’re human, crying is normal,” Pulling away from you, he threw the napkin in the trash as your tears soaked through it, leaving it thin and tattered. “Don’t ever apologize for showing emotions. God only knows we could show a little more around here.”

You smiled and shook your head, “You could say that aga-”

But before he could, the medbay doors opened and the Commander came rushing in, his face contorted into a scowl when he locked eyes on you. Did he catch you going down to see Schmidt? What did you do now?

“Commander, is there something we can help you wit-”

“Monk, I need you to be honest with me,” The Commander began, his gaze still locked on you, “How often is she down here alone? What does she do when you’re not here?”

Acosta took a step back, baffled at the questions that the Commander was asking him. Was he trying to accuse you of something?

“Commander, I don’t know what you’re trying to go on about, but if you’re accusing her of doing something I would like to know what it is-”

“We have reason to believe that she is stashing medicine away to take back with her when we land as part of the ongoing alliance with Germany against Russia.”

The laugh that escaped from you did not help your case, but what in the actual fuck was the Commander on? Reason to believe? Who was feeding him this bullshit?

“Commander, this is ridiculous! Why would I be stealing medicine? You know that I wouldn’t do anything to harm anyone on this ship,” You were taken back when the Commander walked over to you, grabbing your arm and pulling you with him, “What are you- let me go!” You cried, desperately trying to pull away.

Acosta attempted to grab you, but quickly stopped when the Commander turned around, “No, Monk! I’m not doing this anymore. I’m not risking another life on board this ship. Until we get back, her and Schmidt stay locked up. If Jensen is right, then we need them to be kept awa-”

“Jensen? The woman from the wall? That’s who is telling you this? Where is your integrity, Commander, if you can’t even trust your own crew?”

The Commander’s eyes fell to you, staring at you for a moment. Inside he knew that it was wrong of him to be so hostile towards his crew, but after everything that happened, he didn’t want to take any chances. He shook his head and kept silent, pulling you with him out of the medbay and down the hall.

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

The blow to the floor knocked the wind from you - rolling to your side, you groaned and laid your palms flat on the ground before pushing yourself up, catching your balance before staring at the Commander through the small window of the airlock.

“Commander, you know this is ridiculous!” You yelled, watching as he shook his head and waved you off. Scoffing, you threw your hands up in defeat before taking a step closer to the door. “You’re going to believe Jensen? The woman who came out of the wall? Someone who is from a different dimension? Over your own team-”

“Enough!” The Commander roared and you cowered back, stopping in your tracks by Schmidt who was behind you, his hand on your back to keep you from tumbling back.

Letting out a sigh, straightening up, the Commander shook his head, almost in a disappointed way. “We trusted you both, for two years. Two years we saw you as our friends and just to find this? Messages to Germany and Serbia on complying with orders to keep the Shepard offline? To steal medical supplies for your own good?” The Commander paused and looked over the two of you carefully, his eyebrows bunched together.

“We trusted you...and you betrayed us. You’re going to sit here until we get back to base and then you’re going to explain to everyone why you did what you did.”

Before you could get a word out, the Commander was already turned and heading down the hall, leaving you and Schmidt in the airlock. You let out a sigh and felt your shoulders sink before dropping your head down into your hands, hiding your face in case you needed to cry.

Schmidt, while doing his best to comfort you, was still confused by earlier when you stopped by to see him when he was first thrown in isolation. The two of you hardly argued the way you did and his mind was still racing on what you were going to tell him. Of course he had an idea, but he wanted to hear it from you - he didn’t want the assumption.

“What happ-”

“What do you think happened, Schmidt? That bitch from the wall has everyone convinced now that I’m part of whatever scheme they think you’re on!” You shoved yourself away from him, crossing your arms over your chest as you turned your back to him, seething in your own anger.

He wasn’t taken back by your outburst, that he had come to face before, but took him back was his name - his last name to be exact. You never called him Schmidt unless you were absolutely pissed beyond pissed, it was always Ernst.

Catching your arm, Schmidt tugged you back to face him, a glare casted over his own face, matching yours. You went to push him off you again but he caught your wrist, tightening his grip around both wrists now as he pushed you against the wall, pining you in place.

“I’m not the enemy here, remember?” Pinned to the wall, your hands beside either side of your head, you glared and moved your foot up, gently kicking him back until he stumbled away, giving you the opportunity to dominate him, grabbing his waist and tugging him down until he was pinned onto the floor under you. With your hands on his wrists, pinning them above his head, you sat on his lap, looking down at him.

“I remember, but right now, you’re being a real pain in my ass.”

As the two of you huffed, glaring at one another, it was you who finally made a move, leaning forward and kissing him deeply, his hands instantly breaking out of your grasp and coming to your head, holding you close as the two of you kissed.

His neck strained as he leaned up to kiss you, soon growing tired of the burning in his neck and sitting up fully, moving your legs to wrap around his waist as you continued to kiss. You became needy quickly, unzipping his suit to push down until it settled at his waist, the shirt under his suit coming off just as fast as your own shirt did.

In the moment that led up to you sitting in the airlock undressed, on Schmidt’s lap, you all but forgot your surroundings, realizing just how exposed you were to anyone who wanted to come near the room.

“Schmidt, wait, someone is going to-”

“Nobody is going to see us. Someone will hear us if you don’t keep quiet.” He insisted, his mouth open as he tried to catch his breath. His suit was around his knees, shirt discarded with the rest of your clothes while you hovered over his dick naked. Schmidt did prefer the comfort of your room to fuck you in, but in the heated moment the two of you shared, pissed at the world around you and deciding to take it out on each other, this would do.

Blushing at his words, you bit down on your bottom lip and nodding, doing your best to keep quiet while you rested your knees on his thighs, feeling him guide himself into you, his free hand coming to grab your waist, moving you to settle down on his dick. Your head fell back as you moaned, clinging to his shoulders while your hips rocked down onto him, Schmidt’s head falling forward into your chest, kissing the tops of your breasts before nipping at the skin of your neck and jaw.

“You’re so beautiful...how did I get so lucky?” He murmured, pressing wet kisses up your neck before finally looking into your eyes. Your gaze was locked on Schmidt’s as you continued to ride him, leaning forward to wrap your arms around his neck, forehead pressed against his as you raised up and sank back down onto his dick.

“Shh, don’t, don’t say that,” You whimpered at his words, closing your eyes tightly. You didn’t know why you were getting overemotional, but his words were so soft compared to how rough he was thrusting up into you - it didn’t hurt, but it didn’t match the tone of his words. “Please, Schmidt, just fuck me.”

And he did. He kept his grip locked down on your hips as he guided you up and down his dick, the sounds of skin slapping against each other echoing the room. You couldn’t bite your moans back any longer and pressed your lips to his shoulder, moaning into his skin to muffle you. His lips found your own shoulder, biting and sucking dark bruises into your skin, his pace quickening as he felt you tighten around him.

“Желим те, please Schmidt, oh, plea-”

“What? What do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you, liebling.” You whined at his words and felt your core tighten, locking in place sunken onto his dick while he gasped, his fingers digging into your ass that was in his lap.

“I want you, Schmidt,” You weren’t quite at your peak just yet, but you were getting close. Schmidt, on the other hand, wasn’t going to let you quit now. Tugging your head back by your hair, he stared up at you, smirking to himself at the sight of you.

“Not yet,” He warned, one hand in your hair, the other around your waist. He needed to hear it from you, what you were going to tell him, “Not until you tell me what you were going to say.”

It caught you off guard, his demand. Of all the times he wanted you to think, now wasn’t the time. Casting your gaze down at him, eyebrows knitted close, you shook your head, confused.

“I don’t, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” You whined when he thrusted up in you suddenly, trying to get you to focus, “Ernst...please...I don’t remem-”

“When you came to see me earlier - you said all those things about me, you didn’t finish the last part,” He kept his hips moving up into you, reaching his peak as he stared up at you. All he wanted to do was cum in you as you told him that you loved him, “Please...just tell me.”

He was so desperate to hear the confession. His eyes glazed over as he pressed his forehead to you, closing his eyes tightly. If you didn’t love him as much as you did, you might’ve found him to be rather pathetic at the moment.

“Волим те,” You whispered, clinging to him as your orgasm began to finally hit you. You whined and wrapped your arms around him tighter, your legs shaking as you pressed your lips to his cheek, peppering his face with kisses, “Волим те....Волим те….Волим те.”

Of course you had to say it in Serbian - the one language Schmidt still had yet to learn. Before he could beg you to tell him in English, he felt his cock twitch in you and his orgasm finally hit. With a grunt, he sank his teeth into your shoulder, panting against your skin as he came down from his high. You on the other hand, went limp against him, trying to catch your breath.

Both of you sat like that for a few moments, catching your breath while gently petting one another. Your hands running up and down his neck while his went up and down your back. When your brain finally cleared, you sat back and looked down at him, a smile on your face. Schmidt smiled back up at you, taking your face into his hands before kissing you softly.

The kiss was sweet, delicate, pure. This was the Schmidt that you knew, your Ernst - your beloved spaceman. You knew despite all his pent up anger, he was good and gentle. When you both pulled away from the kiss, his mouth fell open to speak, but was cut off by the door opening, although nobody was standing outside.

“Did you do that?” Schmidt found himself asking, staring in shock at the door. Your attention was pulled from the door and at him.

“Ernst, how could I have opened the door if I’m sitting on your dick?” You questioned. You watched his cheeks go red, his eyes glancing towards you before nodding, “Right…”

Helping you up, the two of you quickly pulled your clothes back on, smoothing your hair down to not make it so obvious that you had jumped each other's bones in the airlock. You cleared your throat and took a step forward to see what it was that let you out before coming to a sudden stop by Schmidt.

“Wait, I’ll go first. You just stay back, okay?” You knew there wasn’t time to argue. You obeyed and stayed back, lingering in the doorway of the airlock while Schmidt ventured out, the faint tapping noise picking up the farther he got out.

“Be careful!” You warned, your fingers toying with the string of your sweatpants. Your gaze kept locked on Schmidt as he continued to move down the hall, his steps soon slowing to a stop as he turned, looking down the other end of the hall. He seemed to be in shock with whatever it was that he saw.

“What? What is it-” As you made your way towards him, your own gaze went down the hall where the noise was coming from, your words cut off by your gasp at the sight of a single arm crawling down the hallway.

“Stay here, make sure it doesn’t leave!” Turning, Schmidt quickly rushed back to the door of the airlock, pressing down on the intercom to get everyone down there. “I need the whole crew on M-Deck, as fast as you can.”

Your eyes kept focused on the arm that was crawling to you, stepping back once as if it were going to jump at you. From your spot down the hall you heard the Commander ask who had let them out of the airlock, all for Schmidt to urge them to hurry.

As Schmidt made his way back towards you, standing beside you, both of you couldn’t take your eyes off the arm. It looked to be Mundy’s arm, but you weren’t sure if it was or wasn’t. Of all the things that were happening, this was by far the strangest.

It didn’t take long for the crew to make their way down to M-Deck, the rest of the crew surrounding you and Schmidt as he pointed towards the end of the hall, the arm continuing to make it’s slow approach towards you. When you looked over at Mundy who was beside you, your eyes widened at the sight of his missing arm.

Well that would explain the arm crawling around.

“We need to catch it,” Hamilton explained suddenly. She was right, you couldn’t just stand around watching it, “I’ll go get something.”

While she rushed off to find something to capture the arm, Tam and Schmidt rushed forward, grabbing it and holding it steady until Hamilton came back with a glass box, placing it over the arm to trap it.

“Be careful with it!” Mundy cried. Looking up at him, you offered an apologetic smile, “I just don’t want them to break it.”

“I don’t think you have to worry about that, Mundy.”

He winced slightly, lips pulling to a thin smile before looking back ahead as Schmidt approached Mundy. You were just as annoyed as Mundy was when Schmidt asked if he were controlling his arm.

“I’m not controlling it! It’s over there!” Mundy explained, motioning towards his arm that was kept in the box.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes I’m sure! Because right now I’m giving you the finger!” The two men locked eyes for a moment, as if ready to start arguing before turning back towards the arm.

“How is that alive?” You found yourself asking, crossing your arms over your chest as you took a step closer towards it, wanting to take a closer look. Before you could get too close, Schmidt pulled you back.

“Don’t get too close to it, we don’t know what-”

“It’s my bloody fucking arm, Schmidt! What else could it be?” Letting go of you, Schmidt sighed as he glanced around the room.

“One thing is clear. The overload did it. None of us believed it was real, but this is the paradox,” Of course nobody wanted to believe him, it was too out there to believe that it was real. “Particles interacting with each other across different dimensions. Two distinct realities in a multiverse...fighting to occupy the same space, creating chaos.”

Schmidt paused for a moment, catching his breath from his scientific explanation, Mundy having a seat to process everything while everyone else stayed frozen in their spots around each other.

“These aren’t the things we know...because they don’t belong to us.”

And then it began to click with everyone. Jensen, Schmidt’s communication logs, your own hidden stash of medicine that the Commander found. This wasn’t from your reality, but another.

"While another paradox is thriving, our's is burning...failing." You mumbled. You glanced over at the Commander, who looked between you and Schmidt in guilt. Of course you were still pissed at the accusation, but it seemed to finally click with him that you were telling the truth. Yes, Jensen was too, but that was in her reality, not your’s.

“Uh, guys. I think my arm is trying to write something.”

Looking over your shoulder towards Mundy’s arm that was captured, you were only slightly surprised to see that it was, in fact, trying to write something.

“Quick, somebody get a pen!” At the Commander’s order, Hamilton quickly turned and looked around for a pen, coming back with a red marker and handing it to Mundy, who gave it to his own arm.

“Oh, that’s creepy.” He groaned, stepping back to watch his arm.

As his arm began to scribble, the crew surrounded the glass cage, reading the words CUT VOLKOV OPEN.

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

Standing on the other side of the table that Volkov lied on. You glanced ahead at Acosta who held the knife in his hand, shaking as it hovered over Volkov’s chest. He seemed uncomfortable, not able to cut open into him. When he dropped the knife, he sighed and looked around.

“I’m sorry, I can’t do it.”

“Come on, you’re the doctor-”

“Give it to me, Acosta,” You explained, cutting Mundy off with your hand extended out in front of you. When Acosta did, you took a deep breath and looked down at Volkov. It was almost as if he were sleeping, and perhaps that’s why it took you a moment before finally cutting into him.

The knife sinking into his chest wasn’t the worst part, cutting down until you had enough to rip open. It was ripping him open that made your stomach turn. Taking a hold of either side of his opened chest, you broke open his front, trying to ignore the tearing sounds and the smell from his organs.

When the smell hit you in the face, you jolted back, your arm coming up to your face to cover your nose and mouth, gagging harshly. You shook your head as Tam came up to you, holding your hand in front of her.

“I’m okay, I’m okay.” You smiled weakly at her before turning back to Volkov, exhaling through your mouth before going back in.

Your hands sank into Volkov’s organs, surprised to feel the warmth still in him. It reminded you of Thanksgiving with your family, how you always refused to stuff the turkey because you hated the feeling of the guts.

“Mama, please, I don’t want to do this, you know I hate it!” You whined, your face turned away as your hands sank into the turkey, your face going green.

“Oh just smile! I want to put this in the scrapbook!” Your mother insisted, holding a camera to your face.

You winced and peeked an eye open, “Mama!” You whined, earning a laugh from your father who sat at the table prepping the potatoes with your brother and sister.

“Come on dear, just smile once for your mother, it’ll be over before you know it.” Your father cooed, pausing his moments from slicing the potatoes to look over at you near the oven.

Groaning, you glared slightly for a moment before complying, opening your eyes and smiling weakly at the camera, watching as the flash went off before your mother grinned at you.

“Okay, I think that was enough torture for you. Go wash up and come back and you can help me with the pie.”

Ripping your hands from the turkey, you quickly rushed out of the kitchen and down the hall towards the bathroom, the repeated “ew, ew, ew” echoing throughout the home.

You tried to not think about what you were digging through, your eyes sealed tight as your arms sank in Volkov more, elbows deep before finally feeling something. It felt cold, sphere shaped, something that clearly didn’t belong inside of someone’s organs.

“I found something!” You exclaimed, gripping onto whatever you caught and slowly pulling it out of Volkov. When you stood up straight, holding out what you found, you nearly dropped it in shock. It was the gyro.

The missing gyro was inside Volkov.

[writernomore]

The Blood Ball

Please do not publish my work/ content to different websites and platforms, I only post my work here on tumblr and wattpad.

A/n: This wasn't Proofread because I had been tired and just wrapped this out after writing it on word, also to inform you guys that reader would use he/they pronouns.

Male!Reader

It was pretty much a normal day for you on the Dream smp, you had some minimal chores to do around your base before having to go do other stuff collecting resources for a big project you had been working on, it was a little party, you wanted to celebrate stuff with old friends and new ones where everyone can get along.

Adjusting your armor and such checking your bookbag which you filled with things that were certainly not books inside it if it was closed securely so that none of your things fall out.

Grabbing your axe you walk to your table to grab a list full of materials you needed to gather, you already did your farming and fed your animals and pets so you were okay and set for the day to go gathering materials for the party you were planning .

Going to the door you turn the knob and open it, raising an arm to shield your eyes from the sun, you were going to step forward when a letter was on your doormat, glancing around you don't find anyone.

He picked up the letter and examined it from the front of the letter and to the back of it, the back had his name written in cursive and there was a red wax seal on the letter.

Opening it they were greeted with an invitation, to a banquet.

Dear Y/n ,

We are here to inform you that you have been cordially invited to the Red Banquet.

We hope to see you there along with our other friends!

P.s. Please dress in red attire.

Your friend,

Badboyhalo

He put back the invitation inside the envelope and had pocketed it inside their book bag, and took note to look at their formal clothing later after gathering materials.

Y/n hadn't been hanging out with Bad lately or his friends from the Eggpire because he was suspicious of their actions, they avoided Bad because of Bad constantly trying to persuade and convince him to visit the egg.

They agreed back then but the following had happened wasn't very pleasant, they trapped him inside the egg and told him about how the egg wanted him on their side and how it already had a hold on him, He was trapped there for 14 hours breathing heavily and feeling the pressure of the walls moving and closing in on him.

Sam saved him after he found out Y/n was trapped inside the egg, Y/n was clinging on to Sam for dear life as if they let go of him the egg would get them again Puffy brought Y/n home while Sam had to confront Bad and the others about it.

Y/n now hated the sight of the egg or anything that included it.

He shivered at the memory and just went to close his door and went to gather some wood because they were running out on birch logs.

They also had to go mining for some more stone, and finally find a place to build where he would hold the party.

He would have to also go to the cow farm and gather plenty of milk to make cakes.

Taking out a note book he wrote down what he needed and how many of it he would have to get.

-------------------------------------------------

Putting down their bag on their table they went to their chest they had placed specifically for the materials for the party.

They also had gathered a bunch f sugar cane to make paper since they ran out of paper back then to make more books to write in, they always wrote a lot during free time and they had already filled about three books so it was about time they restocked on materials.

Taking the sugar cane they went to the crafting table and turn them into paper for the invitations they will send soon, it was nice that he was invited to the Red Banquet he needed a break from all the constant material gathering they did whether it was when someone asked him a favor or it was that he needed to let out some steam by focusing his tension on his pickaxe or axe trying to tire himself out.

Wiping sweat from his forehead he finished crafting the sugar cane into paper, placing the stack of paper on the crafting table he went to the straps of his armor and went to place it on his armor stand, he took note that he needed to start mending his armor since it was starting to be worn down.

Walking back to the crafting table he took the papers and placed them in his bag from his kitchen table, going to the cupboards he retrieved a glass and field it with water and took some potatoes out from a chest he placed them in the furnace and while waiting he went to his chest room to check on his materials seeing if anything needed of restocking.

Grabbing some wheat he went back to the kitchen placed down the wheat on the table and went to retrieve his potatoes and munched on them and drank another glass of water before taking the wheat and go outside to feed his animals before going to retreat for the night.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

-*Day of the Banquet *-

Opening his eyes he groaned bringing a hand to run through his hair, standing up he went to fix his bed and go out to the kitchen to prepare something to eat then he had feed his animals so they wouldn't starve for the day while he was gone.

Going to one of his chests he took 2 eggs 3 pieces of bacon and took out some bread, going to the kitchen with food in-hand he took out a pan from his cupboard he placed it on top of the stove and started it, he cracked the eggs and put them on the pan hearing the sizzle of the eggs he placed the bacon along with the eggs, going back to the kitchen cupboard he took out a plate, glass and fork and placing them on the kitchen table.

Pouring himself some juice in his glass he took a bite out of his bread, taking the eggs and bacon out of the pan and placing them on his plate he placed the pan inside the sink.

Stabbing the eggs and bacon with his fork he brought them to his mouth and chewed his food while looking out of his kitchen window.

Finishing he also went to place the dish in the sink and took a sponge from it's container and went to turn on the sink to wash his dishes because he didn't like leaving his dirty dishes around because he was living alone, but sometimes the minors would come and trash his place after eating snacks and telling stories, long story short the minors saw him as of a big brother figure because he helps them alot especially when they get in trouble with the adults in the smp.

Kids would be kids you know? Someone has to look out for them.

Chuckling he finished up cleaning his dishes and went to grab a cloth to dry the dishes and place them down on a dish rack and wipe his wet hands with the kitchen towel.

Going outside the kitchen he went inside his chest room to grab some wheat for his sheep, yeah I guess I haven’t mentioned he loves caring for sheep did I? well now you get to know what animals he took care of all this time, he cared for all of his sheep like they were his children, like how Ghostbur had an attachment to Friend, why he chose to care for a bunch of sheep? He just thinks they were cute.

Opening the gate, he was greeted with the sheep going to him hoping for head rubs, he pets the soft fur of the sheep he made his way to place the wheat on the feeder as soon he finished placing it the sheep went eat the wheat, opening the gate he grabbed a bucket and filled it with water to pour water in the water feeder.

Closing the gate, he went outside the barn and went inside his house to freshen up, going to the bathroom he took his toothbrush and toothpaste and began to brush his teeth, his face had some scars from previous wars in the smp, Y/n was pretty involved with the war he always sided with the minors he made a promise to protect them and not let anything bad happened to them, not after the…accident, shaking his head he spits out the toothpaste.

The whole incident with Tommy being trapped in the prison and being killed by Dream made Y/n much more overprotective towards the younger smp members, he knows they can protect themselves but it’s just a constant battle with his instincts of making sure they were safe and weren’t harmed.

Gathering water with his hands he splashed it in his face and grabbed a towel to dry his face with.

After he went to take off the shirt he wore to bed and went to his bedroom and grab a black button up shirt to wear underneath his red suit, buttoning up he too off his night shorts and grabbed his pants from his closet and put them on.

He grabbed his red jacket and put it on buttoning the 2 buttons and running his hands through the clothes smoothening it out, grabbing his gloves he put them on and took his black earrings from his night stand, looking at himself from the mirror of his bathroom he ran a hand through his hair to fix it.

Examining himself he stuffed his hands into his pocket contemplating if this was really a good choice, he could bring something for a backup plan if anything went rouge during the Red Banquet.

The Eggpire shouldn’t be trusted.

Don’t go.

It’s dangerous.

The voices in his head were fighting with each other whether Y/n should go or not, shaking his head he looked back up to the mirror and turned on his heel and twisting the door knob opening and closing the door once he was outside.

Walking to where people would have to wait for the Banquet to start Y/n was fiddling with his black earrings, back then in the old days of the smp Y/n was good friends with the Dream Team, he hung out with them and the earrings he had currently Sapnap and Dream had them too, he didn’t know if they still had them since he wasn’t able to catch up with them.

Y/n hasn’t visited in Dream so long after what he did to Tommy because he kept his distance with him.

Arriving to the destination he saw Niki, Hannah and Puffy there along with Fundy, Eret and Hbomb.

Walking a bit faster he went to the group of people and greeted with a bright smile “Hello Everyone!” he said.

“Y/n! Well, don’t you look dapper today.” Puffy said putting a hand on her hip, looking down at Puffy Y/n gently took her hand and kissed the back of it “Puffy, looking gorgeous as ever.” “You Flatter me Y/n.”

“I see you went all out.” A voice said looking behind him Eret is there looking at Y/n with arms crossed and a smirk on his face “I see you did too.” “Looking stunning as ever, Eret.” Y/n went to do the same thing to Eret by kissing the back of their hand.

“Aren’t you a big flirt.” Puffy says as Y/n turns around and scratches the back of his neck.

“The Banquet would start shortly, now if you come with me…” Antfrost says, their attention going to him as people follow him down to where the Banquet would be held, there is a hallway where one room branches from it to the left where there is the coat room, Y/n sees Sam “Well don’t you look nice Sam!” He says.

“And you’re looking rather red today Y/n.” he says smiling to the man, nodding Y/n follows the rest of the guests to an open area.

It was all red…

R E D…………….

Shaking his head he looks around, vines coming up from the ceiling blood vines and all that but there is a wooden pathway that would lead to a dance floor, looking around they see the others chatting amongst themselves.

Turning around they see Foolish just coming out from the entrance they walk over to Foolish and greet him.

“Foolish! You look so handsome!” They say looking at Foolish with admiration in his eyes “Thank you Y/n! You look very nice too.” Foolish says chuckling.

“Shall we?” Extending a hand to Foolish they walk to the others laughing “Foolish!” Puffy extend her arms and hugged her son “Don’t you look dapper!” she says smiling up at her son.

After everyone had finished greeting each other they go over to the open area where there was a booth where songs were playing next to it there was a table with drinks, grabbing himself a glass Y/n downed the glass and hummed relishing the taste as the liquid goes down their throat.

Looking around they went to catch up with the others attending the party, laughing at patting George on the back for finally being in time and attending the party Y/n missed talking with George and they talk about how they should hang together just the two of them again some time like they used to back then when everything was normal between everyone before all the wars and explosions started.

"Y/n! You came!" A familiar voice says from behind them.

Turning away their attention from George they are greeted by Bad a smile slowly making it's way to his face he hugs Bad and he turns the gesture by hugging back pulling away he says "Ofcourse I would! It's been long since we all came together!"

"Well I see you're wearing all red." Bad says looking him up and down with the red suit he adorned for the evening "Yeah! Fortunately I had a red suit lying around for some reason." he says scratching the back of his head.

"Oh, George I told you to wear red!" Bad says placing his hands on his hips George could only shrug and laugh, shaking his head Bad chuckles "Well, I hope you guys are enjoying yourselves food will be served soon and we'll do a toast later on, just call Me, Ant or Ponk if you need anything have a good evening to the two of you!" Bad says before turning around and went to interact with the other guests.

*-*

Sitting on one of the chairs laid out along with the long table with plates and glasses, you sit next to Foolish the two of you talk about recent projects the two of you are thinking of doing and about the mansion Foolish was building for Tubbo and Ranboo, you told him to take breaks from time to time and not to exhaust himself while building.

Then the clinking of a spoon against a glass wine cup catching everyone's attention, all focused to the front of the table where Ponk, Bad, and Ant stood.

Clearing his throat.

"Friends, it is an honor to be here with you all today as a community."

Bad says with arms extending to gesture to everyone seated at the table.

"I wanted to invite everyone here to unite us as a whole, to unite this server amongst all the fighting and all the wars we are still a big family and see each other as such."

"And if anyone would like to say a speech please rise and say what you would love to say." Bad said as he took a seat.

“I guess I could go then.” Foolish said.

“Go ahead Foolish.” Bad says.

Foolish takes his glass and holds it on one off his hands “Well, for starters it’s nice to let by gones be by gones, and that sure you may have done some violent stuff back in the past and all of those stuff with the vines and uh..blowing up my summer home.”

“But! Here’s to being given the fourth fifth chance!” Foolish raises his glass and downs it, before sitting down as everyone raises there glass and clap.

“Will anyone else like to go next?” Bad questions.

“I guess I could go next.” Eret says standing up from her seat.

“Oh! Eret, go ahead,”

“So as the Monarch of this server it is awesome to see how the smp is being reunified again and see how we aren’t going to have to worry about fighting on opposing sides.”

As people clapped and Bad called on to ask who love to go next everything was muffled and a sudden ringing was inside Y/n’s head, he clenched his fist and closed his eyes a bit to try and soothe this pounding headache, but alas their effort to was to no avail, a voice started talking in their head, a voice they have not heard of before from the usual voices they heard of.

You really think he could like a person like you?

What?

You heard me

I don’t understand…

You poor thing, thinking that the person he holds close most would return their feelings in return…

What are you going on about?

You think Foolish would reciprocate your feelings?

How do you know about Foolish?

Let’s not go to the matter of how I know but of how I could help you with this situation of yours…

Why would I want your help?

I know you wouldn’t want my help but if you join me maybe I could help you with your love problem, just as long you joined me in the Eggpire….

No, Why would I do that?

……

I don’t want to help you or need or want you help either!

…Then it cannot be helped…

What do you mean?

As Y/n said that red vines were attacking them and restraining their limbs.

They went to scream but their mouth was soon shut forcibly.

Muffled shouts and pleas were landed on deaf ears as Y/n struggled to break free from the vines.

As everything went black for them.

*~-_-~*

As Puffy went to open the chest she had planned to fill with armor and weapons if anything were to go wrong during the Banquet she stared at the now empty chest.

“Oh, Were you looking for this?”

As Puffy lifted her head to look at Bad at what he meant, he along with Ant, Ponk and Hannah were wearing the armor she had stored in the chest.

“What?”

As in cue Y/n stood up from his seat and walked towards the group of four with his head cast down and faced them, Bad put a hand on his shoulder and smiled.

“I’m sorry Puffy, I had to tell them..” Hannah says smiling at Puffy.

“What? But-“ Foolish stutters “Y/n? you’re with them?” Foolish says looking in horror as he stares at Y/n.

As Y/n lifted his head gasps of disbelief and horror were heard, Niki places a hand over her mouth as everyone looks at their friend who now had deep red eyes and his neck had vines running up his neck.

Foolish sees as his friend was standing in front of him his eyes holding no emotion in them as if he was staring at the void their (s/c) had turned gray.

Letting out a shaky breath Foolish shakes his head and looks away because if he were to stare longer he might break into tears.

“You told them about the armor, Hannah?” Sam says.

“I had to tell them, it was the only way.”

Sam glances at his friend, they were perfectly fine a while ago what caused this to happen? Furrowing his eyebrows he mentally took a note to help bring Y/n back to normal.

“Time to go to the main eve-“ before Bad could continue he was cut off by Sam.

“Tragic you told them about the armor well, good thing I had another plan up my sleeve because I didn’t trust you.” Sam says glaring at Hannah as Puffy looks at Sam and nods.

"We can all agree that this whole thing with the egg has gone long enough, and I'm tired of all the fighting so why not blow the egg up for good?"

Sam says walking to the vines and lifting it up to reveal a lever.

The Eggpire watches in confusion on what Same meant.

“So why not blow it up with an amount of tnt that it cannot survive.”

Tnt comes falling down on the egg and start to blow up smoke covering the egg from the explosion but once the smoke cleared it revealed the egg covered in crying obsidian, the crying obsidian slowly fades and it reavels the egg unharmed, they stare in confusion.

Why is the egg still okay?

Why isn’t it blown up?

Bad laughs and says “Did you think tnt would work after that little stunt Quackity tried to pull?” “We took some planning and some preparing so that we wouldn’t have issues with the egg about tnt anymore.” He added.

“Y/n?” Puffy asked looking at him ecpectingly to react or say something but alas they were greeted with nothing just a hollow shell of their friend.

Putting a hand on Y/n’s shoulder Bad said “Don’t worry about him the egg would take really good care of Y/n, so you wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore.”

No please! Help me!

“Now if you would follow me, we could start the…Summary executions.” Bad says smiling.

He walks up the platform with Y/n following in suite gripping a diamond axe in one hand.

“What!?”

“No! What about the speeches man! What were they all about!?” Fundy asks.

“Those speeches were to lure you into a false sense of hope and security.” Bad deadpanned.

“You see in order for the egg to hatch it needs something and this something is we’ll be taking from each and one of you, you see the egg needs energy.”

“And that energy in particular is absorbed into the egg when people die near it and that is the roles you guys will be fulfilling!”

“So now one by one-“ once again Bad was cut off by someone.

“You’re a monster.”

“Excuse me?” Bad raises a brow.

“We trusted you.” Eret says clenching their fist.

“You are one to talk to about trust!” Ponk says angry at the person in front of them.

“That’s all in the past now.” Eret says looking down.

“I changed since then, I know better to not break other people trust anymore.”

Bad stares at Eret and open his mouth to talk “You know what? Eret, I think you’d be the perfect person to…sacrifice first!”

*~-_-~*

In darkness Y/n stood there bound in vines.

Watching as their body is controlled and is doing things they didn’t want to and had no will in what is currently happening.

Please someone…

…./n

…..Y/n..

Y/n!

Y/n gasps and looks up from their kneeling position they are greeted by two entities the one to the left was all white with yellow eyes looking down at him and the other one to the right was all black with white eyes looking at the vines constricting them.

Are you okay dear?

I..I think so?

Helos dear, can you help him with the vines?

I’m already on it.

Being freed from the vines Y/n looked up at the entity in front of him their hand outstretched which he gratefully took helping him stand up.

A shout was heard and they looked to see that a sword was being raised and lowered.

Wincing Y/n put a hand to his head trying to soothe his headache, how does he gain control to his body again?

We can help you with gaining control again.

Looking at the white entity he says “What?”

She said to gain control of your body from this red things influence dingus

The other entity says hitting Y/n upside his head.

Helos!

What!?

*~-_-~*

Gasping Y/n gasps desperate for air feeling his neck as if he was being chocked looking over at everyone they see Puffy with tears in her eyes and everyone staring somewhere.

Looking to what everyone was looking at they see blood and…Foolish’ body..?

Foolish’ body was slowly disappearing leaving yellow dust.

Furrowing his brows and his grip tightening his hold on the diamond axe “WHAT THE HELL!?” he shouts catching the attention of everyone in the room to see Y/n back to normal again.

“Oh! Hello Y/n, had a pleasant nap?” Bad asks him innocently.

“Hm no matter whether you’re awake or not from the influence we would go back to you once this is over ,now , who should we execute next?” Bad asks.

As Bad and the others were deciding who to execute Y/n loosened and tightened his grip on the axe and slowly backed away from the four shaking his head, he could feel the pounding sensation going on in his head and he can’t take it anymore.

Dropping his axe he sits down and puts his head in his hands, no one is going to trust him ever again.

A hand was placed on his shoulder and he was greeted with Fundy looking down at him with a worried expression “Are you okay?” he asks.

“To be honest? No, I’m not.” He says looking at Bad.

As he went over who they could kill out of nowhere Quackity came from a wall and landed in the room.

Quackity calls Bad’s name and tells him to stop.

“Relax Bad, Relax” Quackity says smiling at Bad “I know what you’re doing here, but stop right now, stop.”

“Oh my gosh, look at what you’ve done here, Bad this is impressive.” Quackity says looking over the room and the egg.

“You have to stop Bad.”

“Stop?” Bad repeats.

“This whole egg thing is getting way out of control, you just killed a man is this what you wanted? Is this what you wanted to do all along? Killing innocent people?” Quackity says putting on enchanted armor.

Bad scoffs “You think putting on armor would scare us away and make us stop? Why do you think we went through all of this effort?”

“All of this is for the egg and for what the egg could give us.” Bad says “ So don’t get in our way.” Bad growls.

“You can’t stop us because we’re to powerful.”

“Look at what you’ve done bad.” Quackity says gesturing to the whole room “You’ve trapped all these, these innocent people.” He says shakily.

“And what you’ve discussed as a party?”

“Just look at this Bad, What have they done to you?” “I’m telling you, you’re a pawn for power.”

Quackity rambled on about how the egg doesn’t care about him and that how it doesn’t mean anything, while the Others looked at the egg Quackity gives Puffy a golden apple and a netherite axe quickly hiding them in her inventory whilst Quackity talked.

“How about we stop playing games Bad?” Quackity suggests.

“I can’t you know I can’t.” “You’re not like this Bad.”

“If I stop, then I can’t have what I need.”

“The last chance Bad.” Quackity warns “You and your buddies drop your weapons, leave and let these people go.”

“Or what?” Antfrost asks.

“I’m not talking to you, I’m talking to Bad.”

“No.”

“No, How about you drop your weapons and prepare.” Bad says loading up his crossbow and points it at Quackity.

“Because Quackity if you wanted to stop us, you should have brought more than yourself, Quackity.”

Quackity’s grin widened and he let out an airy chuckle “Guess what Bad? I did. In fact I brought the next best thing, I brought my Biggest enemy.”

Quackity laughs “I’m not alone.”

“Alright Quackity where is this egg?” “It’s right here.” Technoblade walks in though the gap in the wall where Quackity had dropped in bringing along an army of dogs with him.

Y/n stared at all the dogs dropping in, and went to stand up steadily grabbing the axe he had set down but stopped when a hand was placed on his shoulder turning around with furrowed brows he sees Fundy looking at him and shaking his head as in telling him not to.

Which he behaved and just sat back down with a huff he couldn’t fight right now he needed to stop the headache.

“Not only that I crossed the entire lands looking for the best mercenary I could find, because guess what? I couldn’t take you alone so I got the two best fighter in the entire server to help me out with this, so Welcome him Bad!” Quackity cheers.

“What?”

“Purpled!” And on time Purpled had busted in through where Technoblade and Quackity busted in through not so long ago.

“What!? We hired you to take out Puffy and you joined the enemies side!?” Bad shouts at the young man.

“To be frank Bad, Quackity just had the better price.” Purpled says shrugging.

Bad huffs before looking to Techno “And Techno! You and Quackity are enemies, Why would you side with him?” Bad questions.

“Listen, I didn’t want to work with him either but this, this egg is going to far it’s warping peoples mind and it won’t stop till it influences the entire server.” Techno says before getting his dog off the magma block before it kills itself mumbling something to himself.

“And this egg stands for everything for everything I stand against as an Anarchist and if I don’t stop it now, it would be the end of the world.” He says before taking out his rocket launcher “So yeah, I’m working with Quackity.” Techno answers the Demon.

“No, We still out number you it’s 4 against – “ before Bad could finish that sentence as if in cue Puffy takes a strength potion and screams “Antfrost you’re dead!” before charging at Antfrost with axe in hand surprising him and the others “Puffy stop!” Bad calls out.

She swings her axe at Antfrost hitting him and went to hit him again but the clang of His sword coming in contact with the axe was heard, Puffy was quick retract the axe and killed Antfrost with the final blow with the axe to his abdomen.

It was then that Quackity shouts “Attack!” that swords coming in contact with each other wolves attacking and biting the opposing side and arrows being shot.

“Save us!” Fundy screams.

The Dogs went after Ponk and attacked him growling at the one armed man as Techno launched more rockets causing explosions of color “Bad! I’ve always told you that this egg brings nothing but trouble, trouble I tell you.” Quackity “I’m done with fucking games.”

“This is not going to end here Quackity.” Bad screams.

At this point Y/n had already stood up “Get him!” Screams Fundy, all he could do is look at his fox friend and sigh shaking his friend.

“Retreat!” Bad yells.

“What?” Y/n says under his breath.

They see that Bad had dug out a tunnel leading out to an escape route “What? No!”

People run up to the platform and to see the tunnel “Stay here, don’t go after them.” Quackity instructed.

“Purpled I want you to go ahead and track them.” Quackity orders Purpled.

“They’re not going to get away with this.” “Is everyone okay?”

“No.” Y/n deadpans “I don’t know, we just got lured into this place no one had no idea.” Fundy exclaims.

You rub his back and he just buries his head in your shoulder sighing in frustration.

A hand was placed on your shoulder and you turn to see Sam “Are you… doing alright? You in there and not being controlled right now ?”

You give him a tired smile and shook your head no, he nods and rubs your shoulder.

Purpled had returned and told Quackity that it was a Labyrinth down where they escaped “Shit, did we really just lose them?”

“I’ll build a prison for the egg.” Sam states.

“No, Sam there has got to be a way to destroy it right?”

“I’ll try to find another way but for now I’ll lock it up till I find a way how to get rid of this thing.” Sam says looking the egg up and down.

After Sam and Quackity discuss about containing the egg Quackity asks everyone if they’re okay.

“Hey, Y/n” He hums in response “You don’t look to well, your looking a little under the weather.” Quackity says looking worriedly at his friend.

“Yeah, just feeling a bit rough after being..” He stops talking and just gestures to himself by twirling his fingers around his head and points to the egg “Okay..uh just hang in there.” Quackity pats him on the shoulder “Well then I hope hanging by a thread counts.” Y/n jokes snickering at himself.

Leave him alone it’s how he’s coping right now.

“Okay, our objective right now is to get these people out of here, we’re going to get them out through where we came through okay everyone , Purpled you go ahead and lead these people out of here.” “Alright.” Purpled says.

As everyone was being carefully escorted inside the opening Techno, Quackity and Purpled entered through.

As they had finally ascended up to the surface everyone was so happy, having gobe out of that hell hole.

Breathing in the air Y/n looked up at the sky and decided to say goodbye to everyone and said they were going to head home to sleep.

Walking to the direction of their house they thought maybe they shouldn’t throw a party at the moment.

When his house was in sight he sped up and went to run to his home opening the door and slamming it close.

Looking around he took in the surrounding and quiet atmosphere he ran a hand through his hair messing it up even more.

He began to unbutton his suit jacket and take it off walking to his bedroom and plopped into his bed and buried himself within the comforters.

He was to late…

He wasn’t able to save Foolish in time…

He can’t let something like that happen again…

I couldn’t protect Foolish but I could protect others to prevent them from dying to the hands of the egg or anything that wanted to harm them, even if it costed his life.

Closing his eyes, he swore to protect the other people he holds dear.

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Again, sorry that this story isn't proofread I tried rushing this So I'll be able to get this story out as soon as possible.

Anyways, I intended to have had publish this a few more days later but I just decided against it.

Anyhow, If you like my writing why not consider and give me a follow and donate to my ko-fi? It would mean a lot to me! :D

[axoxtxhxh]

Nobody is You - Chapter 8 - Somebody

Summary: Reader and Miche continue their relationship and learn more about each other as well as themselves. Meanwhile, a celebration slowly approaches. Song: I don’t care – Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber (honestly this song is sort of a recurring theme and less related to this chapter specifically) Content: NSFW – Handjob and teaching a handjob so maybe that’s masturbation too? Also some cute, fluffy romantic stuff, and some little moments with all the vets minus Levi. Word Count: ~ 4,800

A/N: This chapter is sort of like a ‘missing moments’ chapter which can be seen as filler, but I like to think it’s entertaining filler since you get to see Miche in love, but also some vets interactions.

As always, feedback is appreciated :)

Miche knew he should have brushed his teeth before going to bed the night before. His breath reeked of alcohol and knowing how much he drank, he really should have at least used mouthwash. His tongue felt like a dry cotton ball and he rubbed his eyes roughly, trying to wipe the sleep away as he rolled out of bed and headed to the bathroom. Erwin had the door closed while he showered and Miche knocked to make sure it was okay to come in.

“Yes?” Erwin called, his voice muffled by the sounds of the shower.

“I’m coming in. I need to brush my teeth.” Miche could smell his own breath as he spoke and nearly gagged.

He opened the door and reached for his toothbrush, popping the cap off the toothpaste and squeezing a glob onto his toothbrush. He turned the sink on to wet it, only to have the glob fall off his toothbrush and into the sink.

“Damn it,” he sighed, opening the tube again to put more on. As soon as the minty freshness of his toothpaste hit his mouth, Miche sighed again, scrubbing his tongue clean and rinsing. He added more toothpaste and started brushing a second time.

He was lost in the relaxing and invigorating feeling of brushing his mouth clean that Miche didn’t notice when Hange and Y/N walked into the room.

“Boo!”

“Ah! Fuck!” He jumped back, opening his eyes and seeing them standing there laughing at him. He grumbled to himself and went back to brushing his teeth. “It’s too early.”

“Well we have some good news for you then.” Hange was bouncing where they stood.

“What’s that?”

“That overnight mission got moved to next month so we will be coming back tonight.”

“What!”

“What?!” Erwin pulled the curtain back a little so he could see everyone, frantically rubbing the soap from his eyes. “Wait! What’s happening? How do you know all this already?”

“We just came from the Commander’s office.” Y/N explained.

“Was there a meeting?”

“No, it was a quick thing. He called Hange and me in and told us to tell you guys.” Hange nodded, staring at the shower.

“Did he say anything else?”

“No, that’s it.” Y/N watched Hange’s head angle slightly as they continued looking at the shower.

“You know Erwin,” Hange started, “when you pull the curtain so tightly to that end, I can see your skinny, white ass hanging out from this side.”

Erwin shrieked and pulled the curtain back to hide himself. Hange laughed loudly, holding their chest, and left the room. Y/N stood there and was still staring quite closely at Miche. He stared at her and wondered what she was looking at.

“What?”

“Are you growing a beard?” Miche looked in the mirror to see what she was talking about. He had forgotten to shave yesterday and now the two days of stubble had come in.

“No, I just haven’t shaved yet.” He shrugged, grabbing hold of his toothbrush and continuing to brush.

“Well it looks good.” She smiled and turned to follow Hange. Miche looked back in the mirror to check it again. He never thought about not shaving before, but it didn’t look that bad. Plus, it would be a lot easier for him to get ready in the mornings. He rinsed his mouth and put his toothbrush away, checking his face one more time. Thinking of the smile Y/N had on her face, Miche rubbed his scruff and slid all his shaving stuff into a drawer, deciding not to shave.

…..

“God, I’ve been dreaming about this all day.” Miche spoke quickly. “I’ve never been more glad for a mission to be postponed.”

He hopped around, pulling off his boots before grabbing the collar of his shirt, removing it and bringing his lips back to hers. It was nearing midnight when they all came back from the training mission and Miche quickly pulled Y/N’s hand before they went back inside. He had asked her if they could go to the stables first and she agreed. A decision she was really wondering why she made, but these days she was finding it increasingly difficult to say no to Miche.

Miche’s hands moved from her jaw to the buckle of her pants and Y/N put her hands on his chest, lightly pushing him back. He leaned away from her, wondering why she was pushing him away.

“We can’t,” she started, “I’m still on my period.”

“That doesn’t bother me.” He held her cheeks once more and brought her lips back to him, lowering his hands to her waist and pulling her against him. Again, she put her hands on his chest and pushed him back.

“It bothers me.”

“Oh.” He mouthed, stepping back a little, but kept holding her hands. “Do you want to maybe just kiss? Or we could cuddle.”

She stepped back, turning around and rubbing her face, knowing she was feeling things that maybe she shouldn’t be feeling. No, that she definitely shouldn’t be feeling. More importantly, she was feeling things she didn’t want to be feeling, things she had actively forced herself not to feel for such a long time.

“We’re friends… with benefits. And I’m not able or willing to give you those benefits right now.” She turned back to look at him. “Why do you still want me here?”

Miche smiled at her and it was one of the few times it wasn’t that smug smile. This was a boyish smile. It was a tender, closed-mouth smile that crinkled his eyes before he closed them. This was the face he makes when he enjoys something, when he smells something good.

“You’re still my friend. And even more, you make me feel like I’m somebody.”

“What?”

“It’s… nevermind. You relax me.” He moved back to her, putting his hands around her waist. “I love being around you. Come on.”

He laid down on the bed and held his arms out for her, that dopey grin on his face. She smiled and laid down with her back to him. His face went to her neck right away and breathed her in.

“You smell so good.” His lips reached her neck and he kissed along her jaw, his tongue dipping out to join in occasionally. He moved to her shoulder and slid her shirt to the side to give his tongue more room to work.

“Miche?” He hummed in response. “This isn’t really how friends hang out.”

“Sorry.” He laughed, pulling away and holding her waist tighter. She turned around to face him.

“But I didn’t say stop.” She stared at him, a warm look in her eyes until she smiled at him and he matched her smiled, leaning back in with his lips over hers. Miche wasn’t very good at only kissing, at least not with Y/N. He always found himself wanting more of her and Y/N was no different. Even though she said she didn’t want to have sex, she was the one who grabbed Miche’s hips and pulled him closer, her leg sliding in between his, and his leg in between hers where she let herself grind against it.

“That feels good,” Miche panted, grabbing her hips to rub her against his already stiff erection.

Miche licked his lips and kissed her again, trying to focus but struggling against giving in to the desire and the feeling of her warm body lightly brushing against his cock. Y/N knew this couldn’t go much further but really loved seeing Miche like this and didn’t want to stop. She pulled back a little, sliding her hand in between them and gently palming his erection. Miche moaned into her mouth, his hand resting on her cheek.

“Please don’t stop,” he whispered into her.

She wanted to continue, to keep going until he was satisfied, gripping-her-body-tightly-against-him-and-moaning-into-her type of satisfied. She wasn’t really sure how to do that though. Men were the same in a lot of ways, few differences here and there, but this was completely new to her.

“Miche?”

“Hmm?” He ran his tongue over her lips.

“I’m not really that confident with my handjob.”

“Really?” He stopped and leaned back to look at her. “Why not? Handjobs are like the easiest thing.”

“None of my exes ever asked for it so I never got the practice.”

“Never?”

“Not really.” She shrugged, unable to meet his eyes, and Miche could see that insecurity she had showing through. She always needed to be the best at everything, he knew that very well, but the fact that she was feeling that hyper competitiveness even now amazed him. He smiled a little as he watched her shift around.

“Well, do you—do you want to practice on me?” He chuckled at the strange question and she looked up.

“Do you want a handjob?”

“I’m certainly not going to say no to one.”

“Okay, how should I start?”

“Well first… hang on, let me get…” He unzipped his pants and pushed them down, with his underwear, past his hips. “Okay, here. Give me your hand. Hold it like this.”

“Like this?”

“Yeah. Now just sort of—not so tight.”

“Sorry.” She frowned, worried that she hurt him.

“It’s okay.” He chuckled at her inexperience, a side of her he had never seen. “You can follow how my hand moves—like this—and just kind of do the same thing. You try.”

“Something like this?” Miche closed his eyes, a moan being pushed out as he bit his lip.

“Holy mother of goodne—your hands are big.” He breathed.

“Does that mean it’s—”

“It feels so good.” He moved his hand to her shoulder, biting his lip even harder as his body reflexively thrusted lightly into her hand.

This was a new feeling for her. Miche was groaning, his face turning a deeper shade of red and that little pout starting to form, all with very little work on her part. He was kind of right, handjobs were actually pretty easy. She just couldn’t figure out why he kept thrusting into her hand and was thinking maybe she wasn’t going fast enough.

“Should I be doing something differently? You keep thrusting.”

“No, no. You’re doing gre—mmm, it’s great. Sorry, it’s kind of a reflex.”

He moved the hand that was on her shoulder to her hip, gripping lightly to get some leverage with his thrusting. A part of him felt bad because he couldn’t help his moans, as quiet as they were, but the way they were positioned made it so he was kind of yelling in Y/N’s face. He moved closer to her, his lips brushing against hers.

“Is it still okay?” She asked and he nodded, sweat beginning to form on his forehead.

“But it’s a tiny bit dry.” He barely winced and she stopped her hand.

“Oh. Should I…?” She thought about how she could help the dryness, but honestly wasn’t sure what he wanted so she waited, hoping he would explain what to do in the situation.

“You could spit on it.” Her eyes shot up to him.

“You want me to spit on your penis?” She whisper-yelled at him and he laughed loudly, his head thrown back, unable to handle her cute reaction. His hands moved up to her cheeks and he pulled her quickly into a kiss.

“Just spit on your hand.” Miche was still laughing as he watched her. “If you want, I can spit.”

“No, I can do it.” She readjusted herself, bringing her hand to her mouth and starting to spit before realizing he was watching her. “Don’t look.”

“What?”

“It’s weird.”

“I’ve had every part of your body in my mouth and you’re embarrassed to have me see you

spit?”

“Yes, well I’m not—Just close your eyes.” He closed his eyes, but tried to peek and she noticed. “No peeking.”

He groaned as he closed them again and just to be sure he wasn’t looking, she put her free hand over his eyes which elicited another laugh from him.

“How much do you need?” She looked at her hand, not sure if the amount of spit she made was enough or not.

“Just enough so it’s not dry.”

“Okay, I think this should be good.” He opened his eyes to take a look but she was already stroking him again and his eyes closed. “Good enough?”

“Mmhmm.” He inhaled sharply at the smooth, and now extremely wet, feeling. He didn’t see how much she spit, but she must have really made sure it was enough and Miche felt himself growing even harder. “A little faster.”

He kept his eyes closed, his hand returning to her hip, allowing himself to squeeze the fleshy parts of her body that he loved so much. He was breathing heavily, sighing deeply as he tried not to be too noisy with her face right in front of his, but when it came to orgasming, Miche was never able to keep quiet.

His hand moved farther up her torso, trying to get as much of her as he could, before moving back down, his grip on her hip tightening.

“I’m… gonna come.” He breathed.

“Really?” Her eyes opened wide. “You’re so quiet.”

He managed a small smile and swallowed hard, his throat dry from breathing heavily.

“I didn’t want—I’m too loud…your face so close.” Y/N watched him lick his lips and smiled, leaning a little closer to him.

“I like when you’re loud.” The air that tickled his ear from her breath had goosebumps raising on his body. She sped up her movements a tiny bit and Miche groaned, leaning into her and kissing her roughly before moaning loudly into her mouth, his hands gripping her hip for leverage again.

Just hearing Miche’s moaning and seeing his face shifting with pleasure had Y/N’s eyes closing, her mind clouding with arousal. Judging by his volume, she could tell that he was close. His grip on her hip tightening had her opening her eyes, watching his face turn a deep red and contorting, nose scrunching up and mouth falling open with a grunt. The thick veins in his neck were bulging further as his body gently shook in front of her. As her eyes were glued to him, she was quick enough to move her other hand over, blocking the thick, hot liquid from making a mess. As she slowed her stroking, she watched his features relax, his eyebrows lifting and the red color draining from his face a bit as he gasped for air and groaned quietly.

An overwhelming feeling came over her, but unlike the majority of the time, this time she wanted to be closer to Miche. Unable to touch him or hug him with her hands the way they were, she leaned forward and kissed him, his mouth opening for her and she let herself in. Miche’s hands went around her head as he pulled her close, his tongue finding hers easily and she moaned into him, causing him to smile against her lips.

He pulled back, opening his eyes and looking at her. There were always so many things he wanted to say to her during moments like these. He never could though. He always just held it in and looked at her with a smile on his face. If only she knew all the feelings he had for her. If only he could explain it to her. But instead, all he would say was a quiet “thank you”.

Knowing it was already late, he stood up and grabbed a towel, cleaning up her hands and moving back to clean himself up and move some of the things that got dirty to the corner so he could wash it in the morning. He thought he was moving quickly, but by the time he finished up and went back over to her, she was asleep. Miche smiled to himself and laid down next to her.

He crossed his arms as he watched her sleep, wondering what she might be dreaming about. Her features were softened a bit, but she still had that hard, serious look on her face, even while she slept and it made him smile. His eyes followed the curves of her face and he sighed. What was he doing these last five years if not looking at her? He went so long looking past her that when he thought about it, he wondered how much he must have missed.

Her hand was resting in between them and Miche reached forward and gently picked it up, playing with her fingers, delicately bringing each one to his lips, kissing it before moving on to the next one. He brought her palm to his nose and breathed in deeply.

Yes, he could smell himself on her hand. Yes, he felt really good about that, continuing to breathe in the mixture of his scent with hers. Yes, there was a small part of him that was happy because of it, knowing that at this point, he could pretend that she was his. He kissed each one of her fingers again, holding her hand and letting it run over his face, her fingertips bumping up and down as they brushed over each of his features. He covered his face with her hand again, closing his eyes and breathing her in. The only smell that had ever been better than hers was the mixture of both of theirs together and Miche couldn’t get enough of it.

Not wanting to wake her, he set her hand back down and pulled her closer, letting himself fall asleep to the pleasant scent of the crook of her neck.

When Y/N woke up, it was dark. Even in the darkness, she could feel that she wasn’t in her bed. In addition to that, something was wrapped tightly around her and she felt around, gathering that it was Miche. She struggled against him, but he latched on like a koala when he slept. He was sleeping behind her and he had both of his arms around her body, keeping her way too securely against his chest. One arm wrapped around her waist, the other arm looped under her neck and around her chest.

She did her best to pull away from him, but his grip was too tight. It wasn’t until she pulled him closer, snuggling her back into his chest, that he loosened his grip a little. She shifted her position and turned around to face him, hoping to use her arms to get some space to breathe. Damn, he smells good. Even in his sleep.

She pushed away from his chest a little, successfully giving herself more room. His arms slacked, resting over her waist. She smiled at the way his mouth hung open slightly as he slept, the way his bangs were falling in his eyes, and the quiet snores that he steadily breathed. His hand gripped her hip tightly and he groaned.

“I wanna hold you.” His voice was groggy as he grumbled and she let him pull her closer into him, his arms wrapping tightly around her again. The overwhelming feeling in Y/N’s chest swelled and her breath caught.

She let out a shaky breath against his chest, the warmth of his body surrounding her. He was still shirtless and his chest hair tickled the tip of her nose. She tried to smile as she closed her eyes and let her nose nuzzle against him. She was shaking, her heart fluttering like crazy in her chest. God, this feels good. Ugh, why does it feel so good? She couldn’t keep doing it to herself though. She sighed, clenching her jaw and resting her forehead against his chest. She took one last deep breath, breathing in the weirdly comforting smell of his body and moved her arm over his waist. Miche groaned again and she smiled, closing her eyes and falling asleep.

The next time she woke, it was much brighter in the stables, the early morning light shining in through the window behind them. She squinted as her eyes adjusted to the light and turned to lay on her stomach. The shifting around woke Miche up and he turned to face her, his eyes adjusting to the brightness as well. He let out a sigh and smiled, his eyes closing again.

“I could really get used to waking up next to you.” His voice was dry, gravelly and rough with sleep and it twisted a knot so tight in Y/N’s stomach she forgot to breathe. He slid closer to her, the morning smile still on his face, and snuggled them both under the warmth of the covers.

She couldn’t understand how he was always able to pull her so close to his body without any limbs getting in the way. His entire body was always somehow flush up against hers, each arm and each leg having their own designated position and never getting in the way of the other.

“I’ll spare you my morning breath.” He laughed softly and kissed her forehead, but for whatever reason, that wasn’t enough and she pulled back and looked up at him.

“Don’t spare me.” He laughed through his nose lightly and looked at her, seeing something, a seriousness in her face that he hadn’t seen before. There was a split second where he was about to ask if she was okay, but instead quickly rushed forward to kiss her and her arms went around his neck, her legs wrapping around his waist.

He suddenly rolled her over so she was on top of him and in one quick motion, she pulled off her shirt, her lips going back to his. Miche’s hands slid behind her, inching towards the clasp of her bra.

Then, just as suddenly, Y/N pulled away from his lips, her head falling to the crook of his neck and she groaned. Not a sexual groan, but a last-minute-realization-and-frustrated groan.

“Damn it.” She sat back up and looked at him.

“It’s fine.” He sat up with her, his nose brushing her collarbone. “I don’t mind that you’re on your period. It really doesn’t—” “It’s not that.” She rubbed her hands over her face. “We have that meeting with the commander this morning. I don’t even know what time it is now.”

“We can be late.” He moved his lips to her neck.

“No, we can’t. And we don’t even know if we already are late.”

“We’ll be quick.”

“Miche!” She complained and he groaned, feeling annoyed.

“You’re right.” He sighed. “You’re right.”

She stood up and grabbed her shirt, putting it back on and helping him find his.

“Well, you know my birthday is in a couple days.”

“Yeah…” She handed him his shirt and wondered where he was going with that thought. “What are you getting at?”

“I have a special request—” He smiled and she narrowed her eyes a bit. “—From you.”

“O…kay…?” She could feel herself getting nervous on what he was going to request.

“Do you think we can spend some time together up here?”

“You don’t want to celebrate with Hange and Erwin?”

“No, I do. We can celebrate with them, but then maybe afterwards, we can come here—” he watched her face “—and just be together.”

“You want like some special birthday sex type of thing?”

“No, no, nothing like that. I mean, we can definitely have sex, but I was hoping to spend time together… Just us.” He grabbed her hand and held it. Y/N couldn’t understand why he would want that when they had friends to celebrate with.

“Okay. We can do that. If that’s what you want.” Miche nodded, smiling, and started swinging their hands back and forth.

“Would there be any way I can convince you to spend the night with me?”

“I thought you never slept up here.” She narrowed her eyes and smiled.

“I don’t.” He laughed timidly and his hand instinctively went to scratch the back of his head. “But we just did and I kind of… I really liked it.”

“Well, it’s your birthday.” She shrugged and they both hopped down to the first floor.

…..

“Y/N, go find Miche and stall him so he doesn’t come in here.” Erwin ordered, both he and Hange were trying to get the last few additions onto the cake before Miche finished his monthly review with his squad leader.

“Why do I have to do it?” She complained, watching them both try to work on the same section. Hange kept accidentally nudging Erwin to which he grumbled at them.

“Because you were banned from helping with cakes at Hange’s birthday.” Hange laughed at the memory.

“I quite liked the cake.” They added, bumping into Erwin again.

“Hange!” Erwin looked up and let out an irritated sigh. “Now the titan has an enormous left thigh.”

“Titans come in all shapes, Erwin.” Hange reminded him. “I think he’s cute.”

“There was a very specific purpose for this one and it wasn’t to be cute.” He spoke through his teeth, letting his aggravation show. Y/N knew what Erwin was like when he was upset and it wasn’t something she wanted to stick around for so she left the kitchen and went searching for Miche.

He was probably done with his monthly review at that point which meant he was either in his room, in the stables, or in the bathroom. The easiest place to start was his room. She opened up the door, stepping inside and closing it behind her.

“Hey.” She stayed in front of the door. Miche was sitting on his bed, tossing a baseball into the air. “I’m here to stall you.”

“They working on the cake?” His face lit up at the thought.

“Yes, but you aren’t supposed to know that.”

“Maybe if this was the first time doing this I would be surprised.”

He was right. They did this for everyone’s birthday, every single year. She couldn’t remember when it started, but at some point, every birthday became the same. Three of them would bake a cake and decorate it in a specific theme for the birthday person. The cakes usually turned out disgustingly, but the decorations were where it mattered most. Each year, they became better and better with the practice.

“So how are you going to stall me?” He set the baseball on his desk and stood up.

“By standing in front of the door like I am right now.” She smiled and held the doorknob tighter and he slowly walked over to her. There was a small part of her that thought he might try to get out and run to the kitchen.

“That’s no fun.” He smiled playfully, standing close to her. “I can think of some things we might be able to do.”

She kept her hand on the doorknob, tightening her grip just a tiny bit more. Miche pressed himself against her, his face lowering to hers and she turned away.

“Miche, I’m not really in the mood now.”

“I’m pretty sure I can get you in the mood.” He bent over, dropping his face to eyelevel with hers.

“You think you know all there is to know about what I like, don’t you?” She teased, looking at him and unsuccessfully hiding her smile.

“Please, you make that nearly impossible.” He laughed. “But make no mistake, I know quite a bit.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?” She let him play with her belt loop, arching her back a little away from the door.

“I know you have a sensitive spot on your neck.” He leaned into her, his nose barely grazing her jaw. “And you’ll pretty much let me do whatever I want if I keep my mouth there.”

“Beginner’s luck.” She angled her head away slightly, giving him more of her neck and he let out a laugh through his nose.

“I bet you I can find it right now.” His voice was low as he moved to the crook of her neck. His nose brushing lightly against her skin.

“Let’s see.” Miche moved in the last little bit, his lips pressing against her neck. He licked over it, opening his mouth and closing his lips around the sensitive skin. She gasped and he knew he’d found it. He brought his hands to her hips as she let out a quiet moan. Her hand ran through his hair and Miche moaned into her neck, sucking harder as he pulled her hips against his body. She let out a soft, but audible exhale and he pulled away.

“Damn, I left a small mark.” He rubbed it with his thumb and looked at her.

“It’s fine, I’ll yell at you for it later.” With the hand still in his hair, she pulled him back down to her and kissed him. Miche smiled into her and lifted her up, pressing her back against the bedroom door.

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