#it's been tough coming back to rping

[mobian-of-science]

@emeraldtied said : In an instant the hero had taken off towards the mouse, claws and spiked sneakers tearing up the ground at his feet. And he showed no signs of stopping.

Primal fear gripped the albino's heart like an iron hand, her shoulders tensing up defensively, but one instinctive flinch was the only movement back she made. Flask took a defensive stance, holding firm balance on top of her rollerblades and her hand on top of the wide array of glass tubes on her belt. The other hand was raised towards the werehog firmly.

"Arrow! Please, be aware of your surroundings! You are four times as big as you usually are, remember?!"

[crownmemes]

Advice; Everyone Should Be Making the First Move

There's been a trend within the rpc here for years now where nobody is willing to make the first move. The problem with this is that if nobody ever makes the first move, then nobody is ever going to write anything. Considering that, everybody should be making an effort to be the first one to reach out to their writing partners more often.

Examples of making the first move:

Sending an IM to say hi, then suggesting a plot

Sending a meme to start a new thread

Responding to starter calls and open starters

All of this is just as valid for old partners as it is for new. If you haven't written with someone in a while, maybe it's time to reach out to start a new thread?

The most common reason I see for people not making the first move is social anxiety. I'm going to give you all a bit of tough love here: speaking as somebody who once had crippling social anxiety (and still does in irl settings), the best way to overcome it is to push yourself to try the things that make you anxious.

Communicating with people is a really important part of rp because it's not a solo hobby, therefore you are going to have to talk to people at some point. It's unavoidable. Here are a few reminders to help you feel a little less nervous:

If somebody follows back, they're doing it because they're interested in writing with you. They are not going to be upset if you send them an IM with plot ideas

Most people are friendly! In 12 years of rping on this site, I can count on one hand the number of people who I've talked to that were actively rude to me

It's okay if someone says no to you! People have different styles and not all of them will work together. If someone says no, say thank you for the consideration, then move on. There are more people to write with out there

If somebody is nasty to you, you can block them. Don't be afraid to do this; you don't have to explain yourself, and you wouldn't want to write with someone who's rude to you anyway

If you're not sure what to say, I usually go with a version of "Hello! Thank you for following/following back! I've looked through your rules and about pages. Would you be interested in plotting something for X and my character, Y? I have an idea already, if you would like to hear?"

Don't just say "Hi!". Cut to the chase and tell them why you're messaging so they immediately know what the conversation is about

Reasons why it's good to message first:

You look actively interested in writing. This is a huge boost in your favour when it comes to asking to write with someone

It makes it a lot easier to get new interactions

It makes you appear more active

If you're a new blog, you won't have a lot of examples of your writing on your blog yet. People will be more willing to give you a chance if you approach them first

If you don't message first, you are likely to be waiting a long time before somebody messages you

It's easier to make friends if you have an active conversation!

Some other thoughts on messaging first:

You have followed the person because you are interested in writing with them. Think about why you are interested, and suggest this as a plot idea

Make sure you read through the rules still. It's very obvious when you haven't. Also, look through the muses on offer so you can suggest which you'd like to write with

If the rules say they're not mutuals only, or that you're welcome to IM to introduce yourself if you want to plot, don't be afraid to message. They wouldn't have put that in their rules if they didn't mean it

If someone is reblogging memes, it's because they want to write responses to them. Send them in! If they didn't want them sent in, they wouldn't have reblogged the meme

IMing to plot is often a better idea than liking a starter call or sending memes if you have never interacted with the person before. It gives you a chance to work out what kind of thread would work well before you start something, so the resulting thread has a lower chance of fizzling out quickly

However, all that being said, it's not just up to the person messaging first to make all the effort. If the receiver doesn't put any effort in in return, then the person making the first move is going to think they aren't interested. Eventually, they may give up messaging people at all, because what's the point if it never goes anywhere? Some tips for not seeming uninterested:

If someone IMs you, try to reply to them in a timely fashion. Especially try to reply to them if they sent you a plot idea. You don't have to agree to do the idea - it's just very annoying to be ghosted the second you actually start plotting

Suggest your own plot ideas in return, or build on the idea that the other person has given you

If you agree to write a starter, or one is written for you, follow through with it. Write the starter, reply to the thread. If it's going to take a while, let your writing partner know that you've seen it but you're going to be slow for a while

Similarly, if you post memes, reply to the ones people send you. If you never reply, people will pick up on this and eventually stop sending you things

If you go on hiatus, message your writing partners directly when you get back to let them know you'd like to write again. This will demonstrate that you really are active and ready to write again

[hwghyjnn]

OKAY I TOOK A BREAK FROM RPING BUT I AM BACK PPL

currently unemployed so i have a shit ton of time to kill + i reply fast if that will entice you guys some more hehe

it's been tough out here, especially finding a partner that i totally vibe with. i'm very friendly ooc so be prepared to hear from me a lot LOL. i will send you tiktoks... i also love continuously plotting as our plot progresses and coming up with random headcanons; it just makes everything so much more fun! also i am 25 years old, so mdni please. no jail time for me.

anywho, i write as hyunjin from skz, and unfortunately i only write mxm, sorry girlies! my writing style is semi-lit, 3rd pov, present tense. length can vary depending on what's going on in the plot but i tend to mirror my partner anyways. i'm also not too picky on who you decide to write as! although right now i am VERY MUCH itching to write hyunjin x lino

as for plots, i'm really open to all ideas! i am just itching to write. although i do love a good angsty plot with looots of tension building. the more our muses hate each other, the better. i do tend to gravitate towards slightly darker themes, but that doesn't have to be the case! pls don't be shy, i love hearing ideas. i do love nsfw as well, it just makes the plot sm more interesting. i generally write hyunjin as bratty/power bottom. kinks & limits can be discussed in private, but i wouldn't say i have too many limits? message me & find out ig hehe...

the platform i use is discord! so feel free to interact & i'll reach out to you or we can skip that step & you can just add me directly @bellethecreator

hope to hear from you guys soon, pls write with me ):

[muse-matrix]

So... It's been a while since I last logged in here. Longer still since I properly did... much of anything here, outside of a few scattered posts. Part of me had been kinda dreading coming back here but looking at when my activity really dramatically dropped off, I think I understand what happened.

So, way back in february of last year, I was bouncing between a lot of things. I was running around doing a bunch of stuff to try and secure a new job, and I did manage that- A big component of my not being here was just me adjusting to having to work again, after being unemployed for almost an entire year. It was tough to get the right structure going, but I managed it. And despite starting college just a couple weeks ago, I've mostly managed that too so far, I think.

But that isn't... the main reason why. Probably. I think.

You see, what else happened in february, was that I got booted from a community I'd been a part of for years. It encompassed my involvement in a card game I loved, as well as the FF14 free company I'd been part of at the time. Someone who was, at one time, a good friend of mine misinterpreted something, and was so incensed by it, they took some things I said out of context and absolutely slandered me to the mod team of that community. (Yes, it actually is as bad as it sounds. I checked.) As a result, I was privately labeled some pretty nasty things, and shunted from their discord server without so much as a word. None of them would speak to me, none of them would even give me a chance to tell my side of things.

Obviously, that stung. A lot.

It had me pretty dejected about a lot of stuff, for a really long time. Probably why I mostly got off of here- I retreated to a different blog where there was less pressure (self-imposed) and more freedom for me to just, kinda, do whatever I wanted without fear or worry. I needed space and freedom to move myself around how I wanted for a while. And then that led to me feeling bad about not coming back here, which made me put off coming back here even longer... You see where this goes.

But at this point, it's been a year and a half. I'm pretty much over that fiasco, I haven't spoken to any of those people since, and they've evidently been content to leave it alone too, given I haven't had any mobs of angry pitchfork-wielding card game players coming after me.

And recently, Kako came back! She's RPing again and that's fun to see. I know a lot of you I've still been in contact with regardless, her included, so most of you probably are already aware of a lot of this stuff, but writing all this out is part of my process, so bear with it. The important thing is, after a lot of time and thinking about things, and seeing friends return to RPing and watching things happen from afar... God, do I want to get back into it with you all.

I very likely still won't be super active, but I'm going to at least try to be consistent. This is supposed to be my main, after all. I'll probably take the next week or so to clean up the muse list, cut a bunch of stuff, get a bit more focused and the like. Not that I'll actually stop playing any given muse- I'm wont to flip-flop between characters I enjoy, and I'm loathe to let fun interactions pass me by just because a character 'isn't on my muse list', but I ought to give myself a bit of structure, at least.

So... I'll try to be here every day, at least. Even if it's just to check in. This'll be a fresh start for me, I'd say, not that any of my old lore or whatever is getting abandoned. It's just... It's been a long time. It'll take some easing back into things for me, so I'm not even going to worry about whatever asks have been left to rot in my inbox, stuff like that.

Given it's been such a long time, some of you may... have blogs that I'm not currently following, cause I've missed them or what have you. So uh, if that's the case, please shoot me a message so I can correct that.

[ratasum]

*breaks into your bedroom* if You're cool with it, can you talk about ur version of Zojja 0v0

So I'm gonna put this under a cut but there are two things to start with: Jenn and I had been considering how to rework our original story with the announcement, and have since decided we won't be changing our stuff at all.

The most important thing to note is that we had been rping for the last decade like Zojja had been there the whole time. And we had considered "Maybe we'll switch that around now that they're bringing her back!"

And then, in our opinion and it's fine if you don't agree but in our opinion, they absolutely botched it.

So we made the decision that she didn't go to the wizards, someone else entirely winds up there, and that's completely altered the trajectory, which I can get into later on. To start: what's up with Zojja?

While back in Rata Sum post-HoT, she was a captive audience. We know from canon that she was a very sought after genius, and since she was stuck in a medical ward recovering, she couldn't stand all the stress. It was something she relayed to Vezz in letters frequently, and spoke to when Taimi visited, as well as once Qirri was well enough herself to visit. She mentioned it often to Eir, as well, since she would come by to check in on her. (This is another complicated bit but! We press on!)

During this time she also thought Leyya was dead. This was because Leyya had run off after learning what happened to her and hadn't been seen since.

It was some time after this, near the end of S3, that Zojja got to the point that she was tired of feeling like she was being watched, feeling like something was present, and feeling the council breathe down her neck to use as a pawn. But right as she was planning to find a way to sneak away was when Leyya finally got over her fear of telling everyone the truth and came back.

There was a half angry, half tearful reunion, with both of them discussing their struggles and anxieties, and finally decided to head to Lion's Arch together. And with help from the Order of Whispers, they got set up at @wall-legion's Odetta's soap shop.

This did involve dealing with Sheridan, a Mordrem. We haven't figured out how they figured that out yet but it takes some time.

It's a lot, but it helps both of them. Zojja can work on recovering peacefully among people she trusts with someone she cares about, even though the chronic pain and fatigue never fully leave her.

They reenter the actual narrative for the first time in Icebrood Saga, when Rytlock calls in a favor from Tyria's premiere dragon expert to help, and she's present when Garrus and Qirri are badly injured by Bangar. Frustrated with her continued struggle with her recovery from Maguuma, she at least does what she can to help out.

(There's an important scene here with Qirri and Zojja that I want to draw but I'm still very shaky in my art confidence so... someday.)

She even helps the krewe get set up in Cantha, watching the two girls she mentored finally come into their own as tough, capable young women. And starts wondering if they still need her guidance at all.

Which is why Zojja is eventually with Odetta and Leyya when they get to wizlandia in the first place.

We had swapped the order of WLB/WLW and the epilogue, so after the epilogue Caithe disappeared... and imagine everyone's surprise when they find her in Wizlandia instead. And talk starts of this talented young elementalist with a deep well of unusual power. If only she'd stay with them...

I can go into more detail on whatever anyone would like, but that's more or less the nutshelled version of it!

[puzzzlepieces]

𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙍𝙊𝘿𝙐𝘾𝙄𝙉𝙂… gabriela sanchez (she/her). gabriela is 30 YEARS OLD and has been at OBLITUS for FIVE YEARS. she works as a ARSENAL GUARD and lives in the RESIDENTIAL AREA. she's awfully DILLIGENT and AGGRESSIVE. heard ARMY DREAMERS BY KATE BUSH? then you've probably seen her.

HELLO !! i'm g, i'm 27 aka ancient and in the aest (forbidden) timezone. i literally havent rped or been on tumblr for 3 years and im so quirky for coming back for this rp!

i'm not a huge discord girly bc i feel that distracts me from rping and writing sometimes (adhd gworl here), but pls message me anytime!

anyways, in melissa barrera we trust our pro-palestine queen.

about gabriela:

originally came to oblitus in tow with her younger sister but ha ha we don't talk about that (her sister has since been k*lled by the creatures)

prev worked in quantico for a while, so she can definitely take care of herself

an older sister through and through. easily annoyed. protective. ever-changing moods etc etc

gabriela misses her sister like she misses her own heart (i know my sister like i know my own mind, she will choose her happiness over mine every time)

gabriela is VERY closed off and emotionally stunted bc she's terrified that if she shows any emotion then the creatures will appear and try to kill her or someone else (this is basically what happened to her sister one night during a heated argument)

i would like to say that gabriela is very morally good but lets be honest, she's quite morally grey.

final girl - esque vibes

if i had to compare her to anybody it would be... lexa (the 100), raven reyes (also the 100 lol), michonne (the walking dead) katniss everdeen (the hunger games), and kate austen (lost)

gabriela can seem quite closed off and un-fun but she really is just always On Guard, and Always Watching. she's 1000% who you'd want with you when shit goes down because she's extremely good at surviving and she's tough as nails

she can hold her own - both drinking wise and fighting wise. while she won't initiate anything or act out, she is definitely the kind of person who's always somewhat simmering under the surface

ALWAYS WATCHING

just misses her sister so bad tbh, her sister was her primary family and ya she definitely will never get over that trauma but o well baby!!

diplomatic but won't hesitate to speak up

nowadays she's pretty lowkey. mainly keeps to herself but is nice enough when you talk to her, won't be rude for no reason except if ur a MAN !! THEN DNI !!! jk kinda not really

very helpful and always willing to help out too, if u need help with anything i actually don't think gabriela will ever say no

is kinda resigned to the fact that oblitus is now her home and is mainly fine with that

prioritises keeping oblitus and its residences safe - so anyone who tries to fuck w the peace will be getting staunched by gabriela

idk what else to say lol

ill post wanted connections in a week or two, once i've properly fleshed out gabriela and gotten a vibe for her - but in the meantime, FEEL FREE TO ASSUME ANY CONNECTION !! im a fast replier and need to actually rp to rlly feel out my characters and understand them so thatll be my main goal, but pls feel free to mssg me ooc if this seems overwhelming JKFDNJKFNK

mwah love yall talk soon

ps i havent been on tumblr in literally 3 years so pls forgive me if i don't know the hippest ways to do styling and stuff dkjnfdnkjfn IM LEARNING I WILL GET IT SOON ur patience is so appreciated

[synnthamonsugar]

on the most recent post on fandom & personalisation of characters and backlash about hc: it's not directly fandom but it's also very hard in writing and roleplay spaces where someone has a character they've poured lots of love and time into and have essentially become extensions of themselves, because any narrative critique or any events that happen to that character are then taken as events that YOU, OOC, are doing to THEM, OOC, because they can no longer conceive of a character not being a stand-in for the person moving them around. character bleed is a bitch and I think in fandom it affects a lot of people who feel very closely linked to certain characters like you said and that they don't have the vocabulary or experience, or willingness even, to describe that that's why they feel that way.

Yeah. It's tough. I know a lot of people make OCs and RP to explore parts of themselves. I also realize that real life harm can come to people when a character's boundaries are violated in RP settings, and don't want to minimize or justify that.

But in an RP setting where ground rules have been laid out for player behavior and narrative content, where everyone has agreed to those rules and not introduced anything that wasn't negotiated beforehand, and boundaries haven't been crossed, I think it's important to not get too precious over characters.

This is something I struggled with when I was brand-new to RPGs, playing a character in ways that harmed the party, were meta-gaming-ly OOC, and overall not fun for me, the other players, or the GM.

It's not a 1:1 comparison because I don't think I projected much onto this character, but I still loved her and loved playing her. And in the end, I didn't get to for long because the campaign imploded. I'm not self-centered enough to think I was the sole cause, but I definitely didn't help the morale of the other players or GM.

Ultimately, I wish I'd gotten more into the RPing aspects even if it endangered her, and, well, played the game instead of trying to keep her encased in a bulletproof bubble at all times. Lesson learned.

I guess how this ties back to fandom is maybe we (fandom) should collectively learn to be okay with loosening the reins a bit. Consider alternate interpretations for characters and practice not get defensive when people have other headcanons. We should reflect on the flaws of characters instead of only idealizing their best attributes. Maybe we should even try headcanoning characters in ways that are different from ourselves, or get into characters who aren't "just like me", because it might actually build a shred of empathy to fixate on someone who's not like you at all. Or at least the willingness to engage with media that doesn't exclusively center and cater to the most dominant demographics in society.

Of course I think this only works if we can all agree to it. I think the current state of fandom, which seems to be tipping away from the transformative and toward the affirming / curatative, discourages exploration. It's hard not to get defensive when you're told even having headcanons is wrong, and that we have to be searching for the true meaning of a piece of media, the true motivations of a character, their true relationships, etc.

[toothycollections]

As per the text post: tell me about your fav oc!!

It's Vera. They're my little, initially human, creature that is forced to dimension hop upon each death that they or their best friend, Briar, manage to stumble into. They don't know why this is happening to them and their bestie. But, through every universe that they are catapulted they learn more about what's going on while feeling like there's less and less control over any of this and the possibility to do something about it grows smaller each day. And their hunger grows with each jump refusing to be satiated by anything but the flesh of other sentient and sapient life.

To say that they're stressed and desperate is an understatement.

Despite this, they keep trying to make jokes and lightenthings up a bit. Every absurd story they pull from nowhere to tell Briar is a tiny escape. Bad puns and inappropriate joke are an effort to remain human and sane. It's tough.

Sometimes, no one seems real to them outside of Briar. And it gets so easy to just push people into unknowns and see what happens to them, like they're video game characters you toss into a blender to see if violence was programmed into the game. But, it's not a game. It's reality, and it makes it so much worse when their empathy clicks back into place and they realize what they've done.

So, before a breakdoen can overtake them, the jokes continue and weave themselves into darker corners, and Vera doesn't know what it means to be a person anymore. They know feeding, fighting, hiding, death, and pained laughter. Briar is still there, but they both shift - in skin, in bone, in organs, in being organic at all - with each jump and neither can recognize the sludge coming out of their wounds for the split second before it heals back up.

Hovering on the edge of reality is something that keeps them going and ot has a voice that only Briar can hear. Can't break down when Briar is around, having it worse, and Vera making it worse with their appetite chewing away at the few friends the two of them make. Solutions have to be somewhere, and they'll dig through every book and bone to find one.

But they break down. Dig through the flesh of their own body to see what's beneath, eat the pieces of themself that have been used as weapons even though it does nothing to sate hunger, pain, or fear. Then they have to get up again because there is no death, only this endless cycle. And it's better to try and make someone laugh.

Briar belongs to @machinedemon and I definitely recommend rping or just world and story building with friends.

[grumblr-confessions]

ooc EVERYONE COMPLAINING ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO PLAY A CHARACTER COMPLIANT TO THE ALTERNIAN EMPIRE I FEEL YOU I FEEL YOU SOOOOO BAD. I’m stopping caps now but I genuinely and deeply feel irritation when everyone’s characters mutant or otherwise are like “Erm actually culling is bad I’ve always thought so” or otherwise get over it as soon as they have a low blood friend/partner. I’ve been in so many situations where I feel legitimately compelled to dumb down my own writing of a character’s psychology because I genuinely was terrified people would attack the character I found compelling because they would fall back on alternian ideologies of culling and status because NEWSFLASH GUYS! 20+ years in alternia doesn’t come undone in just a few moments! Hell, “it’s been a year they’re better” is pushing it! Your Purpleblood isn’t going to become kind and gentle and immediately lose all of their chastisement/mutanism internal or otherwise in a few days! Like if you don’t want to play that I totally understand and am sympathetic (I am a POC) but I’m so tired of people who DO want to write that and otherwise ‘castist’/‘mutanist’ characters getting treated as a butt of a joke and not like. People. Who think like People Would Within The Context of The Story. Like no I don’t support classism or racism but in this fictional setting with characters who are supposed to have development and depth you’re just being Weird. Let people play Alternians man (Sorry, this is really long. Thanks for all your work, genuinely- this can’t be easy. Take your time and rest as necessary, confession blogs are tough.)

“I don’t want to engage with this topic” is completely valid and fair, I get why people opt out, but that’s also a personal choice. Literally leave people rping the canon compliant guys alone? Like nobody’s making you interact with anyone else? That’d be insane? Block and move on friends, it’s not that deep

(And thank you but I made this so I can complain, it’s so easy and also fun, I love bitching on the internet)

[darkheartedprince]

♒ Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in? ✮ Have you managed to stay away from drama? ✿ What do you think about public call out posts?

MUNDAY MEME

Dang , Silas , you really wanted me to come for blood with this one , huh ? Okay , we'll start simple . Thoughts on the fandom I'm currently in . I'd call Kingdom Hearts my home away from home {my home fandoms actually being Harry Potter and Once Upon A Time since as far back as 2012}. I found this fandom sort of by accident , in a great way , because of @lightheartedwarrior {thank you, Rissa}, and have not ever looked back since . This fandom has made me laugh , made me cry , and I have had the absolute pleasure of making some of the most amazing friends I will never forget {psst Silas , you are included in this}. This fandom has gotten me through some really tough times , and not get sappy , but I don't know what I would have done without it .

This got really long , which is why it's under a read more . Long story short , I will say that I have been pretty fortunate to say that this fandom has been fairly nice to me . I am blessed to have made the friends that I have made , and to have had the wonderful experiences that I have had . I also know I'm blocked by some people for who I write with or for some things I write . While it hurts to know I can't interact with those people ever {some who blocked me prior to us ever interacting or talking}, I have accepted it was not meant to be . I deeply appreciate those who I have found in my little corner with my little light Riku and who have made my time in the Kingdom Hearts fandom a dream come true . You all are delightful angels and I am so glad to have met you <3

Okay, squishy time has ended . This is a salty munday meme , after all . I also know that this fandom is . . . um . . . I guess there's no beating around the bush here , it's cliquey . Not following people because they don't like their icons , not following people because they don't like that they don't format , not following people because you might like their writing but hate one specific headcanon they have , etc . I've seen a few people say that it kind of reminds them of high school and I don't blame that comparison on anyone . I understand avoiding people for ships you don't like , but going as far as to spread hate about people for it is not okay . At all . We're all adults . Just unfollow someone or block them and move on . No need to run to your group of friends , say a bunch of misinformation about them , and then cause things to happen . It's not worth anyone's heartache . As a community that is centered around a video game about accepting people's differences and making friends , we really need to get better at it .

No two people write a muse the same way , and no one is 100% canon to a T . So , we all need to be more accepting of various portrayals . On the note of ships , this fandom has some strong opinions about them . Like . . . really strong . Don't get me started on the SoKai vs SoRiku vs SoRiKai thing . We need to chill with that . Not everyone's ships are everyone's cup of tea and that is more than okay . Also , no one can agree on what age any of the main characters are {you can try to argue with me on this , but I have written with 16 Soras over the last four years and maybe three have the same age}. If you make them 18 then they're 'too old' but if you make them 16 - 17 then they're 'too young' . Pick a lane . For everything {not just ships} we can all accept one another's differences and move on . No harm , no fowl .

I have [ [ m o s t l y ] ] managed to stay away from drama . In this fandom , anyway , I have . Perhaps it's because I'm shy and don't talk to many people . Probably that . Am I [ [ a w a r e ] ] of the drama that has happened around me ? Of course . I pay attention . This fandom is big , and yet so small , at the same time . Every fandom is , really . On that note , I'm going to lump the last two questions together . Public call out posts . . . I don't usually agree with . Mostly because they always seem to be a lot of he - said - she - said , and that's very , back to my second paragraph , high school . Now ! If there is a behavior that has been done by one person who has been proven to be toxic time and time again and hurt multiple people time and time again , then that is a different story . Especially if someone claims to have 'changed' only to repeat that same behavior . You can change the cookie but you can't change the filling . I have seen call out posts about people like this . I will say , the ones I have seen have been thorough , with multiple pieces of evidence to back up their reasons , etc . That being said though , as a whole , I don't tend to agree with them ,

[kpopprincessx]

Hey Guys it's been awhile. 2024 has been kind of a tough year. The most upsetting thing to me is loosing my beloved Discord account back in February.

I keep thinking I want to come back to rp on here but I also feel like I love rping on Discord too.

If anyone is interested in reconnecting/catching up or willing to rp on Discord then I just simply hit me up.

Discord: mythicaldreamer413

I hope everyone is and has been doing well.

Also you can follow me on my personal blog which is

[undeadorion-archive]

Did I ever share the being accused of soulbonding my own OC thing here? If I did, I've forgotten. So it's time to tell it.

So, everyone who knows me knows about Crawford. He's an OC that I've had since like 2003. The story that is now River City slowly grew around him. Everything else morphed around him but he's been roughly the same most of the time. But where he really took root as like my Main Guy was when I started RPing with him on LJ, around 2009. Back when I was relatively oblivious to all the ways a person can hate you. Though I still have a lot of fond memories from that time, there was a lot of questionable shit that happened.

A most of the people in charge of the game I was in were local friends. Or rather, I thought they were my friends. I'd known one of them through a different mutual friend, then re-met them again through this whole RP thing. And they were all friends with my roommate at the time and some of them ended up moving in to our apartment complex. Then others that were involved in the game would come hang out. And I was mostly oblivious to a lot of the stuff that was simmering under the surface.

One of the members of the group who lived an hour or two away resented me for reasons that I still don't know to this day. They just flat out didn't like me from day 1 and gave me the stink eye every time I was around when they were. This is R, we'll need their name for later.

For an example of what these people were like, because I couldn't possibly get into even a summary of everything without this turning into a novel. The game required you to apply to join. The page for applications said they were processed on a weekly basis and they often posted the responses on Saturdays. Well, they almost never did that and sometimes would take weeks to process apps. All of which were public. They would then annoyed when people would ask about app status. And they did this, to me, while I'd had my own application sitting there for them to review for like 2 weeks. They wouldn't take "have you considered communicating with people if you're having trouble reviewing the scant few applications you get?" for an answer.

That's how A worked. Everything had to go their way. No, they wouldn't tell you what their way was until you broke one of their super secret rules. Like they absolutely hated chewing noises. I could understand that, chewing noises are gross. But if your chewing was in any way audible, such as eating something crunchy, they would scold you or glare at you. You weren't even allowed to say "nom nom" around them because they counted that as eating noises. They also scolded me for burping like I'd let out a big nasty beer belch right in their face. When it was one of those barely audible closed mouth throat rumble types. That's the level of control that A demanded.

I eventually left that game and that apartment complex. And thought I'd never cross paths with them again.

Then came the incident that killed RP for me.

I was in a pretty rough emotional state for a long time and just wanted to indulge in one of my favorite hobbies. So I joined a game with a fandom character I enjoyed playing (Thor). Things were going pretty okay for a while, if a bit awkward with some cast mates. I got in a bit over my head, and overwhelmed with everything. A lot of people really wanted to play with Thor but necessarily my version of Thor. They wanted their own personal version they'd imagined from canon. So I got fed up and said fine. You get an OC instead.

Now, Crawford is intentionally a very abrasive character. The only emotions he's comfortable showing are indifference or anger. He solves all of his problems with violence. Until someone can crack through his tough exterior and see what a hot mess he is on the inside. It takes a lot, but he's made friends and even adopted a teenager or two in a way.

So I dropped this angry man full of rage into a town where he was trapped and couldn't return home. And I made it clear that if you wanted to play with Thor you had to play with the angry redhead, first. The catalyst had been people treating Thor crashing hard after some pretty serious events and calling him "smelly" and "lazy" when I said he was basically just sleeping for days on end so I could take a damn break.

Things were going moderately well. Crawford got a fair bit of traction. Rubbed elbows with demons and witches. You know how it goes. Then shit just hit the fan.

While I'd seen that A was in the game, they weren't active at all so easy enough to avoid. What I'd missed was that R was in the game, too. I didn't even clock their name as familiar, because I'd forgotten about their strange hatred of me. Well, I made the grave and heinous error of.................interacting with their character. I know. I'm just such a monster. It wasn't even anything major. They never responded and I forgot I'd commented on their post. So I was really confused when a friend popped up saying "Hey, people are shit talking you on the wankgate." Wankgate being an anonymous community where people rant about the most petty shit.

You can't tell me shit like that and expect me to leave it alone. It would eat me alive. So of course I looked. And they were just eviscerating me and my character. Over the stupidest stuff, too. Literally my OC was bad because they didn't like him. That's it.

They said he was "all edge and no substance." And that he was a self insert and swore to much and that being an angry self insert was "on brand" for me. The sort of comments that showed they just wanted to hate him and me without showing they knew nothing about either.

And then there was this comment.

"omg you're not talking about the crawford oc by colin are you? could never fucking stand that character, and the player soulbonds hardcore with him. he's so boring to play off of despite the edgy tryhardness because he's one-note and it feels like interacting with a brick wall."

Obviously I can't prove who posted these things. For all I know it was all just the "friend" who told me about all this nonsense. But I have a strong suspicion R started it, because this started very shortly after I responded to them. And I'm fairly sure the comment above was from A.

A and R were the only two who knew me from far enough back to remember me that well. And the only thing I can even possibly think of that could be seen as "soul bonding" was that for Halloween and conventions Crawford was my go-to cosplay/costume when I didn't have any other ideas. Because it was comfortable. And easy. And it was the first steps in discovering I was trans, because trying to look like a man made me so much more confident in myself.

I was utterly devastated after these comments. I felt hollow and raw and like I couldn't trust anyone. It was made worse by the fact that a friend was being really insensitive that night. The next day she got super mad at me when I said "hey, you know I don't like jokes like that." So I just unfriended her and her friend/roommate who I also followed. I didn't want to deal with any of it. And within the hour the friend popped up yelling at me, accusing me of unfriending her because I suspected her of being involved with the anon stuff. I hadn't mentioned it to either of them. And I haven't spoken to either of them since.

I tried to keep going with RP. A different character in a different game, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I left for a long time. I've tried going back, but it's like scratching at a wound that still hasn't fully healed.

Perhaps, someday, I'll feel comfortable in one of my favorite hobbies again. But I don't think it's going to happen any time soon. At least not in such a public manner.

[cryptiique]

concept: what if i came back here

[wsknbfanaccnt]

Hihii! I love your content!! 😍 I was wondering if maybe you could do a scene where Aomine is at high-school practice and his s/o comes to watch him play and he tries (but fails miserably) to act all tough around his teammates because he can't control how soft he is ffor them? Please🙈

Damn it's actually been years since i wrote anything- I used to be so active on Wattpad and such lmfao

But well, I've been rping in my absence and I hope that makes up for the writing I've lost-

And i do miss writing, so I'll do my best to satisfy and thank you for requesting!

Edit: SORRY IT IT FELT WEIRD- IDK AOMINE SEEMS OOC TO ME HERE BUT I TRIED MY BEST

Soft Navy Blue

You had a bit of time after school today since you had already finished all your homework in class. You and Aomine hadn't planned to do much these days, so you decided to take a peek at the gym to see how he was doing. The moment you stepped into the gym, you immediately lay eyes on the navy blue-haired teen. He just shot a 2 pointer, wiping off the sweat from his forehead with a towel as he headed back for the benches. You smirked and went behind the benches as discreetly as you could. Aomine was too immersed in nothing in particular that he had no idea that you were behind him.

Just as he took a sip of water, you grabbed his shoulders and let out a loud "Boo!" from behind.

"AAH WHAT THE FUCK?!" he suddenly screamed and coughed out the water, falling to the floor in front of the benches. You burst out in laughter, holding your stomach as you bent over.

"That wasn't funny at all!" he hissed at you, coughing a bit more from choking on the water. The rest of the team had caught Aomine's attention from his loud yell, chuckling quietly as Sakurai just hid behind another teammate.

"That was priceless! You should have seen your face Aho!" you laugh, but hold out a hand for him to take. He reluctantly put his hand in yours, but he smirked inwardly as he suddenly pulled you towards him, making you fall directly on top of him.

"Hey-! Daiki...!" you whined in annoyance, but your voice was quickly cut off by him wrapping his arms around your waist and a small kiss on the back of your neck. You felt the blush creep up on your cheeks, feeling the team's eyes bore down at the two of you.

"Oi, Aomine! Stop flirting with your girlfriend and practice with us!" he shouted, Aomine groaning in annoyance. You chuckled and just pat his leg, getting up as he followed suit.

"Go practice Daiki, I'll be here," you smile cheerily at him, the boy sighing and pouting.

"Fine..." he grumbled, going over to the court hesitantly as you smiled softly. After all, he couldn't resist you, especially since he knew that you were trying to prevent him from getting into any more trouble and that you cared for him.

"Oi, Sakurai."

"Y-Yes?? I'm sorry-!" the apologetic mushroom immediately bowed at him, but Aomine leaned into his ear and whispered something. Sakurai nodded as he pulled away, messing up his hair. Of course, you were watching with curiosity as a small smile curved y our lips, and your eyebrow slightly raised. But Aomine suddenly shot up and shoved Sakurai to the side, realizing that you were watching him. The poor boy was confused, just apologizing to Aomine a million times.

He had always shown a mean facade to his teammates, but deep down he cared about each and every one of them. Now that his s/o was watching him, he tried to toughen himself up even more but it was clear that he was failing miserably. As one of the first years accidentally got hit in the face with the basketball he immediately rushed over to him, checking to see if he was okay. Only to pull away and scoff, the tips of his ears tinting red as he insulted the boy under his breath. You observed how he was acting, and having dated Aomine for so long, knew exactly what he was doing.

Soon practice ended and he went to the benches to rest for a bit. You approached him with some water and a towel, the navy-haired teen smiled softly and drank the water.

"Don't try putting that tough act on me Daiki..." you pout, sitting next to him. He turned his face away from you ever so slightly, not wanting to embarrass himself.

"What are you talking about?" he said, intending to hiss at her but really it just came out in a slightly panicked tone. You chuckle and wrap your arms around him from behind, putting your chin on his shoulder.

"I know how much you care about your teammates. I think it's really sweet.." you smile, whispering so that no one else could hear. He only hummed softly in response, leaning against you a little. But knowing him, you didn't want to make him feel awkward any longer.

"Go take a bath, you smell." you suddenly sneer, shoving him away and putting your shirt over your nose to tease him.

"And who was just hugging me huh? Admit it, you love the smell."

"EW! You're disgusting!" you exclaim, just to have him laugh at your remark. He suddenly grabbed your head and pulled you toward his chest, making you gasp with the scent of his sweat going into your nose.

"AHOMINE GET OFF!!"

[badclown]

✖ How has Tumblr RP changed since you started?

Oof this is so tough to explain. I started rping on tumblr in 2015. That was back when formatting and graphics weren't really a thing. We all wrote replies with HUGE gifs instead of icons, and we got them from posts where rp helpers (which used to be a thing, and I used to be one) would kind of gather up every gif they could find of a faceclaim and you could just bookmark that post and link back to their urls. We all had very basic themes and were generally kind to one another and there was no real basis for elitism because there was no one way to do rp that was seen as superior to another way except maybe rpers who wrote in first person versus those who wrote in third, but essentially they just left each other alone. There was no judgement on the basis of your font size, you know?

Back then people understood that indie meant you found your own partners, and otherwise you could join a group rp, but now group rps literally advertise in the indie tags. I think the thing for me that stands out the most was the feeling. Now when I think about tumblr rp, even as a grown ass woman, I feel a certain level of anxiety related to judgement and gatekeeping. I've never felt any type of way about my writing because it's something I pursue seriously, have a natural talent in, and am actively working on improving-- but often that doesn't matter in rp because partners are chosen based on power and control: is this person a part of my clique, can they be bullied, are they perceived in the way that I want to be perceived-- rather than choosing your partners based on their skill, interests, and kindness.

Rp has become so much about how rpers see themselves and others (self esteem and perceived social status), which leads to shit like gatekeeping and theft, and quite frankly emotional terrorism. I've been through things on tumblr rp that I literally had to work through in therapy, but I've also met some of my very best lifelong friends through rp (many of who left rp because of the evolving toxicity but stayed in touch). Ultimately, I'm trying to find people who reject these ideals of rp and embrace that there are only two things about rp that are important and that is creating something worthwhile, and creating that worthwhile thing with someone who treats you well.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[ruby-rolls]

Hey all! Just wanted to give an update on things, since it’s been another several months since I posted anything.

To start off, I’m doing just fine! The anxiety meds I’ve been taking since what happened have helped a ton, and just in general I’ve been doing good. Been keeping myself really busy with games and work, stuff like Xenoblade 3 (fantastic game, you should go play it right now) the new Splatoon, FFXIV of course, and I also recently picked up the Nier Switch port. So to anyone who was worried about me: I’m doing perfectly fine.

As to when I’ll get back to doing stuff on here... honestly that’s a lot harder to say. Recently work has been keeping me rather busy during the day, which can make finding the time to write afterwards tough when I have to try and squeeze that in between my other hobbies. (It doesn’t help that I can’t really multitask writing, at all, so in order to do it I have to basically stop everything I’m doing) There’s also the factor that just having been a way from it for so long can make it getting back into the swing of things tough. There’s been a couple of times recently where I’ve tried to work on some of what I owe people and I had trouble working up the motivation.

All that to say, I do hope to eventually return and be more active again sometime. I definitely still enjoy the idea of RPing and wanna get back to it, so I think me coming back likely is a matter of when rather than if. The challenge is mostly just finding the time and motivation.

So yeah! TLDR: I’m doing fine, just been busy and don’t know when I’ll be back. No need to worry!