#it's also just weird? in ways that the others aren't

[dduane]

Hi, *insert childhood adoration here* just got home from work and don't really have access to true coherent thought. Um. Okay.

Do you know why sometimes, books in a series, from the same publisher, will be in two different sizes? My sister and I figured out that sometimes the exact same book from the same publisher will have two different thicknesses of paper and so one will be slightly thicker, but we can't work out the height and width thing. Same cover design type, like, same edition. Just. One of them is bigger. Do you know why?

Thanks for the wizard books that first made friends of my cousin and me.

First: you're very welcome. I'm glad to have been of service.

On the size question, though: This is one of the Great Imponderables that drives books' writers at least as far around the bend as their readers.

Now there are some explanations that make at least some kind of sense. Sometimes, for example, even within a single edition of a single book, there may be difference-in-thickness issues for some concrete reason: the challenge is discovering which reason (assuming the publisher hasn't themselves told you about it, which is likely to be the case about 99% of the time). ...A common problem is when, for some reason to do with ongoing geopolitical crap or national/international crises, the price of paper changes suddenly. This will cause publishers to try to reduce costs on a book by (the next time it goes back to press) changing the paper quality for something thinner. One of these changes might come between volumes of a series, which is why you might suddenly get a difference between the paper quality of book 5 and book 6 of what's otherwise supposed to be a unified set.

(There's also a similar weirdness in which going up a level of paper thickness will allow your publisher to shove a book of a given length into a slightly higher price point. So, whammo, it happens, and no one bothers consulting you about this detail.)

Or alternately: All of a sudden, somebody at your publisher decides that your series needs to be packaged in a slightly different format that—for reasons that possibly no one in the field even fully understands—is becoming associated with better sales at some other publisher (or some other imprint at your own publisher). So, bang, between one book of a series and the next, the next volume to come out is a quarter inch taller or half an inch wider. And/or 15% thicker (because the pulp of the paper involved has had more air pumped into it than previously). And your books will continue to look like that until some other fad or trend at the packaging end affects them.

(Or alternately, it doesn't affect them, because your publisher's focus has changed in some inexplicable way—or the in-house accountants have crunched their numbers in some new manner—and they've decided your books aren't worth spending the format-change money on.)

(sigh) Tl:dr; There's no damn telling. (It's vanishingly rare that anybody tells us, anyway.) And I wish I had a clearer answer for you than this. Apologies. :/

[nonotnolan]

No Regrets

My roommate's body keeps looking at me like I'm supposed to be making the first move. It was weird enough when my roommate and his girlfriend swapped bodies for the weekend, but the unspoken tension was starting to become unbearable. "Seriously, Tiffany, you're starting to creep me out. Don't you and Daniel have plans for tonight?"

She just smiled at me. "No plans. I'm still deciding how I want to spend my evening. Daniel, though... he's taking my body out clubbing tonight. He wants to see how many free drinks he can score, and I think he's also planning to get laid." Gross. I knew better than to say anything out loud, but my face must have given me away. "Don't be such a prude, Jeff. You know we have an open relationship."

I tugged at my collar. "I know, Tiff, I'm sorry. I just... body swaps that cross the gender line still make me uncomfortable. It feels wrong, somehow. And, I mean, technically they are illegal."

"Oh please, get over yourself," she said, tossing herself onto his bed. "Swaps over 12 hours are also illegal, but that didn't stop you from hiring someone to take your Calc exam two weeks ago. You need to learn how to relax. Not everything you were told on Sundays is true, you know. Some things aren't actually all that bad. You're only clutching your pearls because society told you that swapping genders was bad. What harm is there, as long as both people consent?"

I wanted to argue, but I knew Tiffany was absolutely correct. There wasn't anything wrong with the two of them swapping bodies outside of society telling us that men and women could only swap with other men and other women. Which... given the way that their open relationship also defied societal expectations, I suppose it wasn't too much of a surprise that the two of them thought so little about swapping like this. "You're right, and I'm sorry. I... I'm trying, really. You've heard how conservative my childhood was. It's a lot to unlearn."

"Well, maybe it's time to start unlearning," she said, beckoning me closer. "You want to know the real reason I'm still here? It's because of you, stud. I'm here to see you." Did Tiffany just call me a stud? She had to be mocking me, but I could feel myself blushing all the same.

Tiffany started to unbutton my shirt, brushing her fingers along my exposed chest as she did so. I could feel myself growing erect. Were we... were we really doing this? They were in an open relationship, after all, it wasn't like he was helping Tiffany cheat on his roommate. With his roommate? God, Swappers made things confusing.

"I've seen the way you look at Daniel," she said, rubbing a hand across the stubble on my chin. "I love the man, but he's too straight and too clueless to pick up on those stares. And honestly, I can't help but think that you're too sheltered to realize you're even doing it half the time."

"I... thought I was hiding it better," I said, trying to steady my emotions. Her fingers started to tease my nipples, leaving me squirming with raw pleasure. "I still don't know if I'm bisexual, or gay, or just... Mormon. But I didn't think it mattered. He's already in a relationship with you. What I want isn't important."

"He's in an open relationship," she said, staring at me like I was a hunk of meat to be devoured. "He's also not here right now. I'm in control of this body right now, and I want to fuck you senseless. If that's what you want too, well..." Tiffany slipped her hand inside my waistband, giving my manhood a firm squeeze that had me gasping for breath. "Tonight's a perfect night to let loose. No regrets."

I couldn't hold back anymore. I leaned in for a quick kiss, which Tiffany returned with tongue. The two of us stripped down as fast as we could, though I made certain not to let her pull me onto the bed with her. "Not on Daniel's bed," I said, dragging her over to my part of the bedroom. "His sheets reek of frat boy sweat, and I doubt he has any lube."

"I, uhh... you're alright with being on top, right?" I asked, as I handed her the bottle of lube from my nightstand. It occurred to me that we hadn't actually talked through any plans, set boundaries, or anything like that. "The way you phrased it, I'm assuming that's what you meant, I just--"

"Stop. Thinking." Seeing Daniel's face looming over me, with a look of pure lust on his face, it was everything I never knew I needed. I started rolling over onto my knees before she yelled at me. "Not like that, stay on your back. I want to see your face as I fuck you senseless."

Tiffany spent the entire time telling me exactly what to do, and it was everything I could have ever wanted. She got me lubed, eased me onto her massive manhood, and railed me like there was no tomorrow. My chest was coated in strands of my own cum, while Daniel's cum slowly leaked out of my ass. I'd never had a no-hands orgasm before, but holy hell I could not believe how amazing that felt.

"I can't believe we just did that," I said, trying to catch my breath. She responded by scooping up some of the jizz off of my torso and putting it into her mouth. She was making an entire production out of licking it off of her finger, and I could feel myself getting hard again. "So, uhh... you... you'll be in Daniel's body for the entire evening?"

"If that's your way of asking me if I'd like to fuck you again? The answer is yes," she said, giving me a wink. "Even better, we might be able to make this a weekly thing," she added, standing up to grab some towels. "I don't think I'll have to fight too hard to convince Daniel to swap. What sort of straight man doesn't enjoy having boobs?"

God, I was falling for her so hard. What had I gotten myself into? Life was going to be a long, awkward hell once my roommate was back in his own body. And yet... I had to admit, I had no regrets.

[theelf-online]

Hello I’m taking this as approval to infodump my entire piglin lore onto you and you can’t avoid it. This will be all over the place and also below a cut. because it gets LONG

Anyways Piglins have a non-monogamous culture but not really in a traditional sense. They have many different relationship types/types of love that are all seen as equally valued. Many of these types are ones that by human standards carry an implication of power dynamic, but for piglins the point is that they're an equal exchange. Some of these are a relationship like that between a mentor and a student (think about how a student learns from the mentor, but mentors also learn via teaching their students) or a caregiver and their ward, but there are others that are between two piglins who are "total equals", between rivals/competitors, and one that's more like friends with benefits. And all these relationships are not inherently romantic. They can be any combination of romantic, platonic or sexual. For example one couple might be platonic and sexual, another purely romantic but not sexual, etc. etc. All of them are held on the same standard of "serious relationship" regardless of the details. And also more familial dynamics that are like "basically siblings" and other similar 'found family'-esque relationships because biological family isn't really a thing (more in depth explanation later). There's also no strict male/female requirements (gender/sex stuff described more below) so homophobia just really isnt a thing. Some piglins also only want to have one partner per relationship/love type which is closer to the piglin equivalent of monogamy but that is very much a personal preference, and many piglins don't mind having overlapping dynamics between partners, and some only have relationships of one type. There are also rare piglins who are entirely monogamous and only hold one partner, but it's not the norm and they might get teased by friends about it. (My friend likes to insult me and compare this section to homestuck quadrants or uh... leprechaun relationships? I don't know homestuck /lh)

There are gender roles within piglin society but their sexual organs do not correlate to gender. They are sort of are what they are. There are many piglins who might be considered trans by human standards who wouldn't see themselves as trans because their physical features never changed or defined their identity. There's also a third gender beyond "male"/"female" which has a more spiritual role similar to that in many native cultures. Because of this, its very normal for "male" piglins to also give birth. As far as children go, everyone takes care of kids and parents aren't really responsible for their kids, and its common not to know who exactly their birthing parents are, but for those who do know its not really a big deal. There are some piglins who take on more of a care giving role as a sort of job but they are not exclusively responsible for the young piglets.

Their society is very barter based, and the reason gold is so highly valued is because it's easy to work with due to the softness of the metal, especially due to the heat of the nether. The societal "love language" is gift giving and creating things for others (usually out of gold). The way they "mark" their partners is by creating things for them to wear. For example one piglin might create an earring for their romantic partner to wear, signifying their committed relationship. Should the other person intentionally take off the earring (outside of regular maintenance, hygiene, etc. reasons) it would be seen as a sign that they no longer consider the person their partner. And because of the polyamorous nature of piglin society, many piglins are decked out in golden jewelry from their partners and friends. Different gifts also mean different things, but that is a very social based thing, and between two groups of piglins, the same object could have very different meanings.

Piglins also have weird biology. Piglin "brutes" can easily reach 9 feet tall, with normal piglins hovering around 7-8 feet regardless of sex, although there is natural variation with some piglins just naturally being shorter or taller. Piglin "brutes" are a combination of a job role and a genetic variation. They have traits that make them perfect to be the role of 'brute' (who actually are guardians and protectors of their groups, and often hunters as well being highly respected), but just because someone is born with those variations doesn't mean they'll automatically choose that path in life (but many are pushed by societies standards into that role anyways) and piglins without those natural variations often become "brutes" job-wise. However most players can't tell the difference between the two and so it's mistaken that all Piglin Brutes are variation piglins. All piglins are naturally adept for the heat, and raising their internal body temperature will basically never kill them, unless they're literally on fire. Also because of the heat of the nether, there isn't much bacteria or viruses because they're basically just killed off. Because of this, Piglin immune systems are not equipped to handle them at all, and if they got infected by something like a cold they'd basically just straight up die. Instead their immune systems are built to help fend off fungal infections which are a common risk in the nether. They also don't sweat (no need to bother regulating internal temperature and also water is a precious resource)

Piglins are also in tune with the natural day-night cycle of the nether. The player, being from the overworld, just never can tune into it because it's unnatural to them. Players also don't understand how to get water in the nether (also don't place the water anywhere like an idiot. Netherack is a porous volcanic rock, of course it's just going to go into the holes in the rocks and just evaporate from there). It is possible, but a closely guarded secret by the piglins. The air in the nether is actually incredibly humid, that's what allows the mushrooms to grow in such quantities. All the water in the nether is present in the air, unlike in the overworld where it's mostly in the ground/in rivers and oceans. Piglins have devised a way to make 'cooling rooms' deep underground where water is condensed using cooled sheets of metal. The water that piglins need to survive however is usually just acquired through food. Mushrooms act similar to cacti in actual deserts, often holding a lot of water inside them, and the water that's naturally in the hoglins they eat as well. (They don't require that much water to survive, but they do still need it.) The collected water they do have is seen as a precious resource and is treated in a spiritual manner. Water bathing is done, but again it's a deeply spiritual and ceremonial act, reserved for before unification's, children surviving past a certain point, etc. and normal hygiene is usually done with dust baths (similar to chinchillas). Pure water also isn't drunk much, and is usually made into teas to get rid of the minerally/rock taste that all water ends up with. Tea is usually made with vines, sprouts and roots, and occasionally shroomlights depending on where they live. Shroomlights can be squeezed/crushed to get a sap/nectar-like liquid out of them that could be added to water, so not really tea like the others but close enough. Netherwart was also used, but typically more as a medicinal thing than just for recreation.

Piglins also don't just grunt, they have a complex language system but it's entirely tonal with very few actual vocalized sounds which is why most players just hear it all as grunting (even though there are sounds outside of grunts used). Different groups also have differences in slang and exact tones leading to many different "accents" that sometimes border on being a whole different language. Like someone with a really really heavy Scottish accent and someone with a heavy New York accent might both be speaking English, but that New York accent person will probably have a really hard time understanding the person with a Scottish accent.

These are what I can remember off the top of my head but I'm pretty sure there's more and I'll answer questions if anyone has any. Anyways Peace.

Can we like- start a movement for Piglin rights or some shit

With how much mojang is trying to demonize piglins I really feel like we need to have them unionize.

Start headcannoning random characters as piglins. Make long and educational posts about their lore. Spite the living shit out of what the Minecraft Movie and Minecraft Legends is trying to pull.

[swimming-karyss]

Sabo: loneliness, connection and affection

Trying to organise my thoughts on this matter hehe

I just thought that Sabo's relationship with loneliness and connection are very interesting, and not much people talk about how terribly lonely his childhood days were(even compared to Ace&Luffy).

Ace has been alienated from people from the beginning. Raised in the middle of the jungle, by bandits who never showed much affection, and who repeated the same hurtful words as others did. The state of loneliness is the norm for him. He has never known any other life. Naturally, he'd be protective of what little he has(Sabo) and reluctant to open up and accept new connections(Luffy).

As for Luffy, he has been left alone. Shanks left him after a year staying at Windmill village. Garp constantly took him out of his regular life only to leave him alone in the jungle. And he as well took him away from the village and Makino, after he ate his devil fruit. And while he didn't have [present] parents, he had been cared for. Luffy knows the difference between loneliness and companionship. Which is why he chased Ace's recognition so much.

Sabo's situation is more similar to Luffy's.

But do you ever think that Sabo loved his parents? That he wanted them to love him too? He wouldn't have drawn them if he didn't. He wouldn't be so disheartened at their dismissal if he hated them from the start. But his parents made their love conditional. Sabo had to earn their love and his happiness, while they ignored his pain and attempts to connect. 

And as you know this kind of relationship could leave a lasting impact on how one navigates their future relationships! But on that later😊

Now, Sabo ran away and that opened a whole other can of worms. He's a child, that for five years didn't have anyone to rely on. Of course, Ace was with him, but after he left for the day, Sabo was left completely alone. I mean, at least Ace had Dadan and occasionally Makino and Garp, they shared meals together, he could turn to them in case something happened and they provided him with company and a roof above his head. Sabo lived on the Gray Terminal by himself, in a place where people considered him either a troublemaker to avoid, or a pest to get rid of (those like pirates and bandits). So through Ace and Luffy Sabo gains not only brothers but also other connections and people who care about him! And he welcomes both Dadan and Makino with a bright smile :) Now that I think about it, just like Ace told him about Luffy, he also must've told Sabo about them too🥹

And while all this is nice, his previous problems didn't go away magically. 

(… But his issues aren't stated or shown as explicitly as Ace and Luffy's, so they are easier to dismiss.)

Even though Sabo trusted Ace with his life, he still kept his origins a secret from him, whether it was because he felt them insignificant compared to Ace's or because he feared abandonment in case Ace would be disappointed. And he was more than willing to keep his secret until the very end - Luffy&Ace literally had to beat(strangle) the truth out of him. Sabo also put distance between them in another way too: Ace thought the two of them would sail together, Sabo didn't.

That is honestly also a point to how controlling his parents were. Sabo wanted freedom so much that he didn't mind the loneliness that came with it. Well, he got what he wanted ;) 

Now it would be easy to say that his amnesia also erased his trauma. But it didn't! Sabo still felt hid parents' influence. (And unlike the other weird amnesia case (the sea sure likes to take people's memories huh) - Big Mom - he didn't revert to his younger self, he only lost access to his memories, his feelings and 'character development' remained). If anything it only led to Sabo not being able to identify the cause of his issues → not being able to treat them properly. Now, the RA seem like decent guys, they very well could be the needed support system for Sabo, but again, it's an army with a whole lot of other issues to deal with. So either way his trauma most likely was allowed to fester for a while as we see its consequences show in his adulthood. 

Even though Sabo seems to be doing well as an adult, there's still some signs of emotional distance. He has never reciprocated a hug, even though he doesn't have a problem with physical touch in general, he didn't even think about approaching Luffy in Dressrosa at first and was very tense when actually talking to him. And it's honestly fascinating just how stiff his body language was in Dressrosa (maybe I'll talk about it in general some other time) - be it shock or anger he keeps his arms to his body, unlike Koala or Hack, who choose violence.

He also showed barely any reaction during Vegapunk's speech despite the panelling focusing on him specifically. I'd say he mostly keeps his negative emotions in check, bc in Robin's little flashback he was quite expressive! The main counterpoint is 'special Luff' where he is very open about his anger, but he has a really decent reason for it: his feelings being made fun of. And as you'll see later it's a very sensitive topic for him →

To begin with, he avoids talking about things that have emotionally impacted him in any way.

1.This one might be a stretch, but he begins to talk about his encounter with Fujitora, only not to say anything in the end, idk what's wrong with him; 2. After a very emotional fight with Burgess Sabo dismisses any worries without even mentioning the fight; 3. He refuses to talk with Hack about Luffy, even though we know that he loves to yap about him to Dragon. And that is right after he didn't want to wake Luffy up to even say goodbye! He also changes the topic quickly so Karasu wouldn't be able to further question him.

Even though these scenes are played as gags, he really seems to have trouble with emotional intimacy and opening up about his feelings. And that makes him seem inattentive and irresponsible, thus affecting his relationships with others even more… 

And speaking of which, he is accustomed with either suppressing his feelings or at least just keeping them in check. He hides his worries from his colleagues, appearing as cheerful as always. And during his meeting with Dragon and Iva he brushes aside his guilt and grief for king Kobra (but, I mean it's a work meeting, they need to be professional) and never once he acknowledges his injuries.

And if he's willing to disregard such a thing as grief, how do you think he really feels about his new title, which was gained by the blood of a man he failed to save?

And frankly, right now we don't know much about Sabo! We know about his childhood, and the way he presents himself now(and that is some material to work with), but the 12 years in the Revolutionary Army are a mystery, and again it's an army, I bet he's seen many things, especially considering how high his position is!

tldr: like Luffy, Sabo has a special relationship with loneliness and abandonment. But unlike Luffy, who especially in pre-ts hated separation, Sabo pushes people away. And what makes it even harder for others to connect with him, is that he tends to hide his feelings and problems.

(like a cat)

but again, I might be reading something wrong, my bad

[slushiedog]

Gonna be real and just say this shit. Fuck anyone who is rude to you because you're in tcc or dislikes you just because you're in it. Don't let people like that get into your head cause as long as you aren't harming others why should they care? You like something then like it why should people give af about what YOU do and like if it ain't hurting anyone. If anything they are going out of their way to harm you mentally by being a dick to you which makes them just as bad as they think you are for liking something that wouldn't be deemed as normal. Don't feed into those mfs either if they wanna say some shit and not acknowledge how you feel then why should you acknowledge how they feel? People like that most likely just wanna say some shit to start an argument most of the people being dickheads are gonna forget about it in a day so don't give af about what they say. At the end of the day its all about you fuck anyone who tells you otherwise. Be as weird as you wannabe or in general just be yourself cause no one should be able to control how you wanna be and what you like.

-

Also I don't understand how people think its okay to be jerks to people in tcc. Were all human and nothing can change us from being that. Its weird that they'll care so much to say something but not realize they're acting like some of the perpetrators bullies.

[tweevee3]

Yeah yeah and "communists allied with nazi germany in WW2" and "there's "socialist" in national socialist" so communist = nazi. Amazing how this response is proving my point MORE.

And now also you see this is problem with calling literally any transphobic woman a TERF. Woman =/= feminist. Most of the "TERFs" doing that aren't TERFs at all, they're conservative women who were called TERF once and just ran with it not knowing what it means. They're just TE and not RF.

Well anyways first off I hate nazis infinitely more than any TRA and most radfems I know are far leftists, so let's get that out of the way. How about you argue about my actual points instead of this weird attempt at guilt by association.

Personally I'm not really as big on the trans issue but these are the reasons I'm against the idea of gender>sex.

The entire idea of gender is sexist. No, people aren't born feminine or masculine and gendered brains aren't a thing.

Removes importance of sex-based rights, like abortion. Also implies that women can self-ID out of misogyny. TRAs telling radfems to "just transition" in response to us disliking misogyny is an example.

Allows rapist men to self-ID into female prisons or women's shelters. Idrc about the bathrooms and sports though honestly, cis men can walk in whenever and people take steriods.

Feminists shouldn't have to shut up just because other women do.

Honestly I've noticed that a lot of the anti-terf shit is like McCarthyism

Like the "if they talk about feminism a lot they're probably a TERF"

reminds me of the shit like "If they talk about workers rights they're probably a communist"

Like damn maybe kind of accurate but how is there no "are we the baddies" moment here?

Like seriously what is this shit bro? @oarfishing�� https://www.tumblr.com/oarfishing/758650339125821440/alright-im-sick-of-seeing-terfisms-on-my-dash?source=share

[rayyanishere1]

"Studying? Yeah, Totally."

A Short FiddleStan Oneshot

(Part of the Loser Ford AU, but isn't relevant to the lore whatsoever lmao)

One night, Ford announced that he'd be at the library for a couple of hours.

"Knock yourself out, Sixer."

Once he left, Stan and Fiddleford looked at each other.

"Wanna..?"

"You don't even have to ask."

Stan led Fiddleford to the couch with only one motive in mind.

Forcing him to watch trashy television! They spent good money on that TV, and by God, they were gonna use it.

"Ladies and Gents, welcome back to 'Your Guess Could Be Royally Wrong!' The show where you don't win prizes, but you don't get punished, either. I'm your host, Zain Squalus—"

Ah, yes, gameshows. The peak of entertainment.

"Is this really what you wanna watch?"

"It's either this, weird chick dramas, or the news."

Welp, can't argue with that.

Fiddleford tried many times to make a move; pretending to yawn to wrap his arm around Stan's shoulder, not very subtly inching his hand towards Stan's thigh. Hell, he tried to go in for a kiss at least 3 times!

Without fail, something would make Stan dodge his advances. Oh, he suddenly has to shift a little in the opposite direction to grab something, oh, something shocking happened and he needed his whole body to react to it.

Seems fate was planning on cockblocking Fiddleford today. Not cool, man. Not cool.

During a commercial break, Stan left to get some snacks. That gave Fiddleford some time to think.

It was obvious that subtlety was getting him absolutely nowhere. He just had to be a little more direct, right? Yeah, that's definitely it.

Stan returned with a bowl of chips and sat back down. Now was time for Fiddleford's master plan.

He used every tactic he knew all at once. Wrapping an arm around Stan's shoulder, leaning in closer. Maybe he should also try getting Stan's mind off of this weird gameshow he was so invested in...

"You know, Stanley, we're home alone."

"I would hope so, yeah."

"And we aren't doing anything."

"Yes, we are! We're watching Your Guess Could Be Royally Wrong, the totally original gameshow based in Oregon."

"I just thought that, with Stanford gone, we'd be doing something else."

"...I don't follow."

That's Stan Pines for you, folks. The dumbest genius on Earth.

"Stanley..."

Fiddleford didn't know if he wanted to laugh, cry, or scream. Instead, he decided that his plan of being direct was the right way to go.

"Stanley Pines."

"That's my name. Am I in trouble?"

"You're going to be if you don't kiss me right now."

"Haha, what?"

∆∆∆

The TV buzzed on in the background as they practically devoured each other's faces.

"Fidds, if you were this—hah—pent up, you could've just told me.."

"I tried to! For an entire hour!"

"Wait, really?"

"Lord, yes! I suppose something was keeping you from noticing."

"Uh huh.."

Deeming the couch to be too uncomfortable, Fiddleford took it upon himself to bring them somewhere more suitable for their.. Activity.

He picked Stan up like he weighed nothing and carried him to the bedroom.

Many kisses later, the two were shirtless and all over each other. It was like they were trying to fit multiple days worth of making out into one session. To be fair, though, it wasn't often that they had alone time like this.

Stan pulled away for a moment, much to Fiddleford's dismay.

"Ford's been out later than usual. He could come back any minute..."

Just as he said that, they heard the front door open.

Oh, God.

They rushed to put something on, not bothering to check what they had grabbed. If Ford saw them like this, in their shared space, Lord knows they'd never hear the end of it.

"Wait, are you wearing my—"

Too late to change now!

A few lazy knocks came from the door before Ford went in. He didn't even look at them, he just dropped his bag on the floor and flopped face first onto his bed.

Stan sighed in relief. It was a good thing that Ford was so tir—

"Wait."

The couple tensed up, expecting to get berated for their "inappropriate behaviour." Instead, Ford just took his glasses off and put them on his side table before promptly passing back out.

That was close...

[deeninadream]

First Name Basis (My One Shot from Ao3)

Warnings: Bar setting, alcohol consumption, drunk reader, that’s about it I think, oh and this is my first fic!

Summary:

You go out with the team to wind down after a long week. You planed on only getting one drink...but ended up getting crazy drunk. In the end Hotch has a soft spot for you and you like using his full name. ---- This was going to be a part of my future series, "Necessary, Needed, & Wanted," but I though i just put it up first. Enjoy!

While you decided that a night out with the team, drinking, dancing, and gossiping would be a good way to forget the most recent case, you had certainly not expected to get this drunk.

Derek sat to your right; an arm slung behind you on the sticky booth. Pen sat, or really happy squirmed, to you left. At the beginning of the night, you suggested they sit together, and that you could sit with Spencer.

This was only really because you didn't want to get too crazy tonight, and you had recently read an article you would love to discuss with him. However, they insisted that they squish you in between them to protect you from any guys that came your way.

Dave sat across from you with Hotch on one side, and Spencer on the other. Emily had convinced JJ to go dancing a few minutes ago, but you're sure they'll be back soon.

Now, how did you go from getting a Shirley Temple to getting hysterically drunk? No fucking clue.

So here you are, jumping in between every conversation. Whether it's office gossip, a new scientific discovery, Jack's upcoming birthday party, or why you don’t have someone to go home to at night.

At least that's what it feels like to you, to everyone else though…they're having productive conversations, and you're randomly (and rather cutely) asking not so productive questions.

“Daaaave?!” you ask in a whisper yell. Dave looks over from his talk with Hotch to see you leaning over the table. You’re sure no one else can hear you, though your whisper yell is more at a raspy talking level.

Dave doesn’t even have to raise an eyebrow for you to continue.

“Okay, so obviously I know his middle name from the documents I look at all day loooong. But I can’t find it in me to remember his first name. What is his first name?!”

Now everyone is looking at you, not that you notice. They aren’t surprised you’ve asked such a weird question, but they are definitely intrigued.

Dave chuckled, glad that you’re finally letting loose, ”Who’s first name, darling?”

“Like I know his middle name, right, ‘cause I think it's funny that I’m the only one that can call him out on his shit like that. But it doesn’t work if I don’t know his first name,” you wine a little at the end. Like you’re five and he's not getting you ice cream.

Hotch raised an eyebrow at that, he had never seen you so delirious. He had been around you with barely any sleep for a week once, and you were more put together. Not that he’s complaining.

Now it's Derek's turn to chuckle, "Pretty girl, if you want us to answer you, you have to tell us who you’re talking about.”

You pay no mind to Derek; it's like you had a tunnel going from you to Dave. This just makes everyone laugh. Emily and JJ are coming back around, not that you have any idea.

At that Hotch puts his beer down and leans into your line of sight slightly. Your eyes immediately lock onto his. Everyone’s waiting, knowing that if anyone can get something out of you, it would be Hotch.

“Who are you talking about?” Hotch asked, surprisingly also wanting the answer.

You just stare into his eyes. If you weren't already unaware of your surroundings, you certainly aren't now.

Pen sees an opportunity to chime in, "Are you talking about that hot guy from budgeting?”

Your head snaps up, and directly to Pen’s,” OH MY GOD! Pen, please tell me I didn't say he is hot! I’m not supposed to say that!!” you wined, looking frantic and mortified.

Emily chuckled next to JJ at their chairs at the very end of the booth they now occupy, "Okay, are we talking about the mystery man, or the budgeting one?”

“I thought they were the same person?” JJ jumps in, though she's still looking at Emily. Spencer nodded his agreement with furrowed brows.

You now look towards the couple, seemingly forgetting about your momentary outburst after a sip of your drink.

“Mystery man," you say with a nod of finality, "Also ‘mystery man’? He’s your boss, Emily. How could you forget his name…? Oh wait, that's what I was asking. Dave, what's Hotch's first name?”

At that, everyone at the table excluding you and Hotch burst into a laughing fit. After a few moments of everyone trying to catch their breaths, and you looking around the table for some clue on what is so funny, Dave speaks first.

“Hotch’s first name is Aaron, you know this,” Dave helps you out, as if Hotch wasn’t sitting next to him.

“AARON BENJAMIN HOTCHNER!!” you take a small sip of your drink, "Thank you! I will be using that every chance I get!” Now your drink and pointer finger is aimed at Hotch.

Hotch looks at you with wide eyes and then smiles a smile that only seems to be for you. He then shakes his head, reaches across the table to pluck your glass from your hands.

You look up at him with a pout, ”Hey! I will use your middle name again!”

He just lightly chuckles and slides out of his side of the booth, "I don’t doubt you. Come on. Let's get you home.”

“But, but, but…” he just gives you one of his signature Hotch stares,” Oh, okay. Goodbye everyone! Mwah, mwah, mwah! I'll see y'all on Monday.”

Everyone says their respective goodbyes as Hotch helps you out of the booth. As you stand up, you trip a bit due to your heels, and your uncoordinated state. Hotch quickly catches you, putting an arm around your waist.

After standing fully up, you put your arms up in the air, and yell loud enough to be heard above the music, "AARON BENJAMIN HOTCHNER, EVERYONE!!”

Your group and most of the people around you laugh. Hotch shakes his head and starts to lead you out of the bar.

When you finally step out into the cold air, you look up into those coffee eyes. They tell you that while you may just be on a first name basis, there's a lot more than that for both of you.

Guess getting a little crazy doesn't have to be such a bad thing.

Notes:

Hope y'all liked this! I'm new to this and would love to know what you think!

[seeingteacupsindragons]

On using epithets...

A lot of advice on them is to not use them at all or to use them very sparingly when a name isn't indicated. And I understand that impulse because...yeah they get overused a lot especially by writers who aren't confident enough yet to overcome the fear of "overusing" a name (very rare problem) or haven't figured out more seamless and invisible ways to indicate a character.

But an epithet can also do a lot.

Basically, using an epithet indicates that this description of them is the most overriding and distinguishing feature a person has. This is how you're referring to them and how you're indicating this person specifically.

Obviously people do this when they know nothing else about someone (nameless guards, soldiers, audience members...whatever). But it's a lot more unusual when the reader and characters know who a character is and knows a lot more of their traits and quirks and thinks of them as a character or a person. My friends don't think of me as "a blogger" or "that online weirdo" (uhhh, probably)—they think of me as "Marr" (or in @quill-of-thoth's case, my government name). Because "Marr" encompasses my whole ass identity (or at least my online one).

But there are still times even after you know a character and everything about them that epithets can be useful and warranted.

"Their friend" at a pivotal moment emphasizes a friendship. Usually you wouldn't have to do that because your reader knows the friendship. But during a betrayal, a smile from "their friend" to indicate this is still somehow the person they love? Killer. "Their friend" to indicate this is the most important relationship to them, even if they're risking making it a romance or something? Killer. "Their friend" to contrast someone else in the scene to emphasize that a third person is not? Killer.

"The soldier" can do a lot to describe that every other facet of who they are has been emotionally compartmentalized away for combat. "The soldier" can do a lot to describe the way someone tucks away their individuality for their cause. "The soldier" can do a lot to describe someone's readiness and constant vigilance.

"The elder" can do a lot to emphasize their maturity. Or their weariness. Or their rank.

Epithets can be really powerful and useful tools to make an incisive, descriptive point.

They just feel weird when they're not being used to make a point and hanging out subbing in for a name, the same way using an excess array of various dialogue tags instead of sticking to more unremarkable ones the majority of the time.

Epithets are a lot more visible than names are, the same way, "he shrieked," is a lot more noticeable than "he said," or just an exclamation point.

Your reader will notice your epithets. What do you want them to notice?

[heartz4levi]

mhm... i keep thinking ab scummy till..

you're screwed up and brilliant !

☆ thinking abt scummy till . . .

☆ till (alnst) ,, gn reader . . modern!au ,, actor!au ,, reader is a mua ,, till is ooc in favor of making him be as scummy as i could ,, till is just. a bitch in this one. and reader cannot stand him ,, is this?? anything at all?? i tried anon, i tried. hope i executed ur ask to ur liking. </3

stark in contrast to the character he plays, till is an absolute scum.

alien stage, one of his biggest projects, but not the most. you're co—workers with him.. sort of. he's an actor in the series who plays a pretty big role, but all you are is a make—up artist for the cast.

while the cameras were rolling, you would drop by ever so often to see which scene they where shooting, to get a better grasp on what the plot is and also to see the brilliance of each actor up close.

everyone was generally kind whenever they were getting their make—up done. some are quieter than others and don't say much, some are more energetic, but all in all each and every one of them treats you with basic desency. the bare minimum that till doesn't even think about achieving, because of course, out of an entire roster or renowned actors someone has to be a lot shittier in terms of personality behind the camera.

you love your job, you really do. you get to collaborate with a bunch of celebrities, you get to create some of their most iconic cosmetic looks and, most importantly, it's fun to do make—up on people. but sometimes you feel like dropping out of this project solely because of till.

he willingly sits still in the chair when it's his turn to get his make—up done and he isn't picky about what styles he does and doesn't like. makes him seem like a regular client, right? wrong.

till will stare at your reflection in the mirror, shooting you the dirtiest looks known to man. if you notice and ask him what's wrong, he'll complain. oddly enough, never about the make—up, but about you, nitpicking any and every single thing you do. it feels like you're not even allowed to breathe in his presence.

if you ask him to calm his face muscles down because you cannot work on someone's face when the canvas is contorted all weird, till will do the complete opposite. he'll scrunch his face up even further, refusing to relax and allow you to do your job in peace. that shenanigan just makes him look childish. but don't tell him that, or else he'll throw a hissy fit. a childish hissy fit.

to be fair, you aren't the only person whom he critiques whenever he gets the chance to. he does the same with his co—actors, shooting nasty glances their way and calling them out on their acting specifically. as if he has a shit ton more years of experience and has better technique.

before you know it, filming for alien stage is wrapped up. then, some time later, it officially airs and although the fans gravitate in every direction, to each character, a lot of them choose till as their favourite. understandable, because his character is a lot less of a douche.

you would think that such a dedicated fanbase could only serve to inflate till's ego even further. but it doesn't, because he doesn't need any fans to consider himself superior and able to judge everyone without ever suffering any consequences. till cares about those fans just about as much as he cares about everyone else who has worked with him — long story short, he does not care. like at all. no fucks given.

but people still don't know that. during promotions for alien stage, till doesn't say much. he leaves all the talking to his co—actors, spacing out and occasionally nodding because god he does not want to be there with all of those people — yeah, he likes acting and starring in ambitious projects, but the promotions part? yeah.. no.

if any reporter, or anyone else for that matter, decides to ask him a question, till will do anything to evade it. if the question isn't about him and he is there witb a fellow actor, he will immediately glance pointedly at them, a silent order that they should do the talking, not him. if he can't evade the question, the answer he gives is short and blunt, making the interaction be as brief as possible.

well, that is none of your concern. he's done with sitting in your chair, having your products be applied on his face and you're done with having to tolerate him for hours on end. thank the fucking stars.

or maybe.. don't thank them.

plenty of time passes before you're thrown into another project that is bound to gain endless popularity once it's out. it'll take a while, it'll take a lot of hard work, maybe even some blood, sweat and tears — but you're glad to be apart of the team regardless!

you're glad until you see who is playing the main character.

not again...

[decepti-thots]

☕ i vaguely remember a meta post of yours mentioning that point one percenters were a useless concept and that it also messes up megs' narrative, i'd love to read the full version of that take!

You are remembering this post, which covers the basic reasons I feel like IDW Megatron specifically does not work as a point one percenter!

More broadly, I have two big problems with the concept existing in a general sense. The first one is that it's simply ill-defined in a way where it simultaneously is not clear what it even means and yet that ambiguity is not taken advantage of for storytelling purposes the way that, say, the nebulous idea of what an outlier is gets used. Outliers don't have a clear definition, in the story- but the basic concept of 'some of these robots can do weird superpower shit outside the norm, and they are recognised as being a kind of weird group everyone sort of side-eyes suspiciously' is easy to understand as a reader and by keeping it vague, it can be used to explain quite a wide variety of character abilities without running into too much nitpicky 'hey, but that ability doesn't really match what we know about outliers, so...' stuff. It's also presented pretty value neutrally a lot of the time; Skywarp and Thundercracker aren't like, Special Chosen Ones because they can do a couple weird tricks other characters can't, they're just sort of anomalies with a couple useful abilities up their metaphorical sleeves, yknow.

Compare that to a 'point one percenter'. What is the one-sentence elevator pitch for this concept? That their sparks are... stronger, somehow. (Higher energy? More resilient? Harder to snuff out?) Okay, and what does that mean for the characters, what does that do? Well. Maybe it's why Megatron is Just That Strong, apparently. MTMTE also says this, not being an outlier, is why Minimus can wear external armour without issue- but also it's not like every point one percenter can necessarily do this, so I guess it's different depending on the mech? Or maybe they can all do it and just don't. Who Knows. I guess it's why Overlord survived becoming a phase sixer- but it's not what makes him Just That Strong. But also I guess Megatron could beat him in hand to hand combat at some point. Magnus can't though, and he's ostensibly a point one percenter? Basically, there's never really even that very broad line drawn around what the hell it means or why anyone cares someone has an extra-radioactive green spark.

And I think the point there is that like... most of the fandom just assumes Minimus' ability is being an outlier, right? And for a good reason: a ton of the stuff point one percenters can potentially do is better explained by them simply being outliers! And there we hav a problem. Having these two unrelated groups of mechs that are nebulously Different And Special to explain certain things they can do that other characters can't is just confusing when really, one would realistically do, and the reason I think it's the point one percent concept that ought to go and not the outlier concept is that the latter just raises a lot less questions.

Questions like, you know, hey, why the entire hell does this comic need an objectively measurable way to tell if someone's soul is somehow just inherently kind of "superior by" some metric. That's such a bizarre fucking thing to introduce into a narrative trying to do what MTMTE is doing; if the forged/cold construct divide brings a lot of baggage into MTMTE's themes, the point one percent stuff is just a total albatross around its neck, IMO. All point one percenters have forged souls (even Megatron, that being the twist of EC), and point one percenters are all these big important genuinely Just Plain Better characters like Megatron and Optimus and so on where the reader is clearly supposed to have this feeling of like, 'oh of course those guys are the special ones'.

If there was some attempt to explore how like, being a point one percenter just meant you could lift real good or whatever and wasn't actually meaningful in any other way but became unfairly treated as a sign of greater "superiority" nonetheless, I might see a clearer goal to the concept being introduced; you could maybe do something with "this thing that is actually very small and arbitrary is fluffed up by the powers that be as way more than it actually is". But like... all the named point one percenters we ever see outside a couple cons Megatron made bigshots in the army are genuinely these people who outside just being physically very strong, are on a narrative level understood to be the sorts of characters one might call 'destined for inherent greatness', or something. Right? There's no random nobody never-did-anything-special Lost Light background character who turns out to be a point one percenter who's just Some Guy, or anything. They're all iconic named high command type characters with Epic Fates and shit, lmao.

(Minimus could have been that character, even as a protagonist, because of the conceit of his arc in MTMTE- but they really never manage it with him either, tbh. And again, it really feels like that was much more in line with the outlier concept, and fits better there anyway.)

There's just a lot of 'have your cake and eat it too' with this whole barely-touched plotline in MTMTE, for basically no payoff that couldn't be achieved another way. Where Roberts falters with character writing is IMO when he's writing characters he is kind of precious about due to being a longterm, hardcore fan with nostalgia- you see a lot of that sentimentality at points when he's writing these characters from his childhood like Optimus or Megatron. A sort of elevation of these characters due to their metatextual status as iconic and narratively important that other characters (including, notably, Rodimus) benefit from not being subject to. And the point one percenter idea is, ultimately, a way to try and make that an objective fact in universe, it feels to me. Some of these characters just are better in a special, vague, you-know-why way. But like. MTMTE is a story that wants to talk about how presenting certain kinds of people as Just Better is wrong and cruel, too- and that tension doesn't wind up being used for anything productive. So if there's one single piece of worldbuilding I would fully remove wholesale from the comic, it would probably be this one. More than just being largely narratively irrelevant, it's also genuinely something of a problem for the comic's attempted themes.

[marzipanilla]

And right now the only wall bashing happening is my head against the bricks lol

I love how we've totally managed to swap which thread is actually discussing SU stuff lol

Jasper finally breaking down like YOU HAVE THE POWER OF A DIAMOND. you are a diamond! And yet you wander around. paying for things. staring at the scenery. I WOULD CONQUER GALAXIES IN YOUR NAME. why aren't you ordering me to use MY power to do that? am I too small now, my diamond?

And poor Steven just having to be like, okay, first off, stop calling me that- here, eat this donut, we're gunna watch the sunrise and I'm not gunna unpack all that bc it's not my job anymore. you can figure it out Jasper. I'm pretty sure you already know the answer.

J: because you're weak?

S: -.- Try again.

lol Nolan hobbies powered by spite. yeah. Him suddenly being supportive of Mark going to college if he goes in for journalism xD Mark awkwardly meeting up with SpiderMan later after his dad has him shake him down like, hey dude, we good? you aren't secretly evil, right?? and Peter having to throw that line right back at his face and then they get the ultimate irony later. Aw, now I'm thinking about Peter and Aunt May hanging out with Debbie and Mark after lol

Would JJ lose his shit or actually start a Omni-Man was framed campaign??? he works against Invincible and Spidey now xD JJ and Powerplex in a room together. oof.

You saw my ep reorder ramble already but yeah !! Powerplex should have opened the season. Then the way I see it, Mark then has his future Immortal run in and is then all fucked up about having to kill him/not wanting to/being forced into it, and maybe he tells Cecil about what happened because they are still kinda buds at that point ! And then the Doc Seismic shit is happening and Mark is holding back bc he just killed a guy again and is wigging out and everyone gets screwed. Then when Mark loses it on Cecil he can be like the GDA doesn't get to decide shit. Powerplex worked for you, stole from you, and murdered his own family. And Cecil gets to be like You JUST came back from the future and told me you were an emperor who left Immortal in charge !! I NEED a way to contain you ! It would make his willingness to be so stupidly overhanded make more sense if he had just heard this kid merked and even older Immortal.

All of the pieces are there !! why is the narrative so out of sorts !! WHY

I actually legit thought Powerplex was new to the show for a moment before he said his name and I saw his family and my brain supplied an image of them flash fried and I was like, oh yeah, I kinda recall this xD

Oliver talking about what he remembered of his parents would have been so fucking important to open with ! I should not be learning this at the end of the fucking season ! And instead of bullshit with Paul we could have gotten a moment from Debbie expressing what she goddamn thinks about Nolan's legacy. What she actually has been telling Oliver about his family, if anything. How she feels about her role in everything and not some bs stock 'normal' shit which she has never expressed wanting before. There is a meter between 'world conquering jackass' and 'total stale white bread' and I think she deserves not to be stuck on world conquering jackass, but she should be nowhere near stale ass white bread.

Way back in S2 I was actually chatting with some other folks who had also read the comic, and honest to god one of the things we talked about that I hoped would happen aside from Oliver being totally written out (a fucking pipe dream but I honestly thought only 3 months had gone by in the show and not the 6 from the comic until the show ass pulled another three months out of Mark's time at high school somehow...) was that if they did keep Debbie raising Oliver that they LET her be weird and a little resentful and that was why he turned into such a prick who was down to murder. Because no matter how decent she was trying to be to this kid who didn't deserve being treated like garbage due to who his father was she couldn't fucking help it, and I would have been fine with her showing that bit of weakness. but they kept everything pretty much the same except they allowed her to not be totally into it from the get go like the comics.

Right now the stuff I like about S3 are, the Cecil flashback, Nolan's breakout, and ep6. Like. hope to god y'all saved your entire animation budget for the last two eps and they don't totally crash and burn so at least if the story continues to be meh I can at least watch something fun.

I know you want to put Powerplex and Mark in a room together but Debbie talking to him. like. I lost everyone. all my friends were murdered. my husband was a monster. my son nearly died. all my close friends of the last 20 years were murdered. You see me out there killing randos and picking fights? No. I'm getting my shit together and building something. You had a family and you pissed it away.

God. I think I just miss seeing her be a little mean to people. Even her talks with Cecil come across as sad more than angry. Let Debbie fucking yell at people again, what the fuck happened there. She was so dismissive of the white house attack ! of Nolan ending up in another dimension ! YES LET HER BE RECKLESS. let her be callous. stop having her suddenly being a fucking doormat for other people's freakouts. its okay baby, I support you no matter what ! FUCK THAT. she needs to snap or at least be shown getting some support so I understand why she isn't just fucking killing people lol

Debbie designating herself a fucking Problem when. Her and a crew of villain adjacent buddies coulda been so fun. Cecil not being able to spy on them anymore bc she now has resources to get that shit off her back. I need people in her corner so fucking bad. A much more gray morality Debbie tho. It's honestly one of the things I really appreciated about S1. She doesn't tell Mark to be good, she tells him to make choices he can live with. The closest she gets to a 'be a hero' statement is nobody is beneath help. God. I would love for that convo to come back up between her and Mark. for it to get nasty re: Nolan.

Eve just starting a business is like, okay whatevs, but that is a federal prison. Government contracts have so much shit built into them ! how they work what you need to do to qualify ! and this fucking teenager just gets the contract?? it definitely shows that heroes are above the law bc wtf. Is it bc she worked with the GDA before that it got greenlit?? If there were attempts to bring a fucking court case against Invincible in recent memory and the public was shaky on his image bc his dad just tried to take over the fucking planet why would he qualify for government contracts !!! if you really want to try and fucking double down on his stupid prison is the only option mandate, than fucking have him go into a damn job interview and give the best police brutality is justified cop speech ever, bc prisons are responsible for the health and safety of their inmates and them hiring man who punches things does not speak highly of the care they give. Tie his fucking job into why he is a hero and not 'damn I need money guess this'll do'. and it is once more something he does not pick. Doormat Mark expose when. just... damn.

Where did the character drama go ??? why do episode one off randos get more depth ??? The exchange between Kate and her brother was great, and it was 100% the kind of conversation Mark should have been having with someone. I also immediately wanted to be like 'oh are you going to mention that you were willing to let everyone believe you were dead just to run away and get out of things Kate? including your brother remember that? no? hm' Why is Rae suddenly living out Kate's apparent fucking dream of retirement. like wtf happened there.

While I'm not too familiar with the DCU- your batfam meta posts are intiguing- so in transfering some of the broader strokes from them- I think you tackling a 'Mark isn't Nolan's biological son' fic would be fascinating. Sort of a step to the side of the 'what if Mark never got his powers' fic that sometimes pop up in the fandom

OOOOOO chewing on this currently, hm, the much a distinct flavor of exactly what you’re talking about, but the potential for more family drama depending on WHO knows. Does Mark know?? Is he waiting every day only to be crushed? Does he confused non-Debbie features with Nolan’s? I suppose I’m not the most enthusiastic about non-power AUs, but I think there’s something very fun to explore about Mark having to settle with, if he knows all his life, he will never have powers? I think the trajectory of his dreams will obviously shift, I can see him still having that distinct fatherly idolization, but perhaps embraces being useful to the GDA? Cecil’s number one intern—only intern—curtesy of nepotism, ha! There is something tickling me about Mark taking the Robin Route/Role for the Teen Team in terms of having no powers, just insane skills, BUT there’s something way more delicious about intern Mark when s1e01 happens and Mark tries snooping around to find out the truth about what happened to his Dad.

I wonder if, with Mark having a whole another father, if they’re more or less distant relationship, depending on WHEN Nolan entered Mark’s life? Like if Debbie met Nolan later for this, or just for fun, they dated once, separated (Mark being born during then), then they happened to stumble into each others lives again and Mark’s already been born, anywhere from tween to teenager so there’s a gap in how close they are. I feel like one important aspect of the whole Family Drama is how close they’re supposed to be, a functional, loving family turned upside down? So I wonder what more distance does. I wonder how Nolan copes when his family is entirely human and he can’t project onto Mark.

I love thinking about these, omg.

[always-a-king-or-queen]

The ache will go away, eventually. 

That was what the Professor told them, the day they got back. When they tumbled from the wardrobe in a heap of tangled limbs, and found that the world had been torn from under their feet with all the kindness of a serpent. 

They picked themselves off of the floorboards with smiles plastered on child faces, and sat with the Professor in his study drinking cup after cup of tea. 

But the smiles were fake. The tea was like ash on their tongues. And when they went to bed that night, none of them could sleep in beds that were too foreign, in bodies that had not been their own for years. Instead they grouped into one room and sat on the floor and whispered, late into the night. 

When morning came, Mrs. Macready discovered the four of them asleep in Peter and Edmund’s bedroom, tangled in a heap of pillows and blankets with their arms looped across one another. They woke a few moments after her entry and seemed confused, lost even, staring around the room with pale faces, eyes raking over each framed painting on the wall and across every bit of furniture as if it was foreign to them. “Come to breakfast,” Mrs. Macready said as she turned to go, but inside she wondered. 

For the children’s faces had held the same sadness that she saw sometimes in the Professor’s. A yearning, a shock, a numbness, as if their very hearts had been ripped from their chests.

At breakfast Lucy sat huddled between her brothers, wrapped in a shawl that was much too big for her as she warmed her hands around a mug of hot chocolate. Edmund fidgeted in his seat and kept reaching up to his hair as if to feel for something that was no longer there. Susan pushed her food idly around on her plate with her fork and hummed a strange melody under her breath. And Peter folded his hands beneath his chin and stared at the wall with eyes that seemed much too old for his face. 

It chilled Mrs. Macready to see their silence, their strangeness, when only yesterday they had been running all over the house, pounding through the halls, shouting and laughing in the bedrooms. It was as if something, something terrible and mysterious and lengthy, had occurred yesterday, but surely that could not be. 

She remarked upon it to the Professor, but he only smiled sadly at her and shook his head. “They’ll be all right,” he said, but she wasn’t so sure. 

They seemed so lost. 

Lucy disappeared into one of the rooms later that day, a room that Mrs. Macready knew was bare save for an old wardrobe of the professor’s. She couldn’t imagine what the child would want to go in there for, but children were strange and perhaps she was just playing some game. When Lucy came out again a few minutes later, sobbing and stumbling back down the hall with her hair askew, Mrs. Macready tried to console her, but Lucy found no comfort in her arms. “It wasn’t there,” she kept saying, inconsolable, and wouldn’t stop crying until her siblings came and gathered her in their arms and said in soothing voices, “Perhaps we’ll go back someday, Lu.” 

Go back where, Mrs. Macready wondered? She stepped into the room Lucy had been in later on in the evening and looked around, but there was nothing but dust and an empty space where coats used to hang in the wardrobe. The children must have taken them recently and forgotten to return them, not that it really mattered. They were so old and musty and the Professor had probably forgotten them long ago. But what could have made the child cry so? Try as she might, Mrs. Macready could find no answer, and she left the room dissatisfied and covered in dust. 

Lucy and Edmund and Peter and Susan took tea in the Professor’s room again that night, and the next, and the next, and the next. They slept in Peter and Edmund’s room, then Susan and Lucy’s, then Peter and Edmund’s again and so on, swapping every night till Mrs. Macready wondered how they could possibly get any sleep. The floor couldn’t be comfortable, but it was where she found them, morning after morning. 

Each morning they looked sadder than before, and breakfast was silent. Each afternoon Lucy went into the room with the wardrobe, carrying a little lion figurine Edmund had carved her, and came out crying a little while later. And then one day she didn’t, and went wandering in the woods and fields around the Professor’s house instead. She came back with grassy fingers and a scratch on one cheek and a crown of flowers on her head, but she seemed content. Happy, even. Mrs. Macready heard her singing to herself in a language she’d never heard before as Lucy skipped past her in the hall, leaving flower petals on the floor in her wake. Mrs. Macready couldn’t bring herself to tell the child to pick them up, and instead just left them where they were. 

More days and nights went by. One day it was Peter who went into the room with the wardrobe, bringing with him an old cloak of the Professor’s, and he was gone for quite a while. Thirty or forty minutes, Mrs. Macready would guess. When he came out, his shoulders were straighter and his chin lifted higher, but tears were dried upon his cheeks and his eyes were frightening. Noble and fierce, like the eyes of a king. The cloak still hung about his shoulders and made him seem almost like an adult. 

Peter never went into the wardrobe room again, but Susan did, a few weeks later. She took a dried flower crown inside with her and sat in there at least an hour, and when she came out her hair was so elaborately braided that Mrs. Macready wondered where on earth she had learned it. The flower crown was perched atop her head as she went back down the hall, and she walked so gracefully that she seemed to be floating on the air itself. In spite of her red eyes, she smiled, and seemed content to wander the mansion afterwards, reading or sketching or making delicate jewelry out of little pebbles and dried flowers Lucy brought her from the woods. 

More weeks went by. The children still took tea in the Professor’s study on occasion, but not as often as before. Lucy now went on her daily walks outdoors, and sometimes Peter or Susan, or both of them at once, accompanied her. Edmund stayed upstairs for the most part, reading or writing, keeping quiet and looking paler and sadder by the day. 

Finally he, too, went into the wardrobe room. 

He stayed for hours, hours upon hours. He took nothing in save for a wooden sword he had carved from a stick Lucy brought him from outside, and he didn’t come out again. The shadows lengthened across the hall and the sun sank lower in the sky and finally Mrs. Macready made herself speak quietly to Peter as the boy came out of the Professor’s study. “Your brother has been gone for hours,” she told him crisply, but she was privately alarmed, because Peter’s face shifted into panic and he disappeared upstairs without a word. 

Mrs. Macready followed him silently after around thirty minutes and pressed an ear to the door of the wardrobe room. Voices drifted from beyond. Edmund’s and Peter’s, yes, but she could also hear the soft tones of Lucy and Susan. 

“Why did he send us back?” Edmund was saying. It sounded as if he had been crying.  

Mrs. Macready couldn’t catch the answer, but when the siblings trickled out of the room an hour later, Edmund’s wooden sword was missing, and the flower crown Susan had been wearing lately was gone, and Peter no longer had his old cloak, and Lucy wasn’t carrying her lion figurine, and the four of them had clasped hands and sad, but smiling, faces. 

Mrs. Macready slipped into the room once they were gone and opened the wardrobe, and there at the bottom were the sword and the crown and the cloak and the lion. An offering of sorts, almost, or perhaps just items left there for future use, for whenever they next went into the wardrobe room.  

But they never did, and one day they were gone for good, off home, and the mansion was silent again. And it had been a long time since that morning that Mrs. Macready had found them all piled together in one bedroom, but ever since then they hadn’t quite been children, and she wanted to know why.

She climbed the steps again to the floor of the house where the old wardrobe was, and then went into the room and crossed the floor to the opposite wall. 

When she pulled the wardrobe door open, the four items the Pevensie children had left inside of it were missing. 

And just for a moment, it seemed to her that a cool gust of air brushed her face, coming from the darkness beyond where the missing coats used to hang.

[sainteclectic]

Actually hell yeah put those freaks in an insanely codependent qpr. I 100% understand this and actually I think all weird codependent freaks are simply meant to be qpps. The religious worship themes with wholesoul are a bonus

put those beasts in a loosely defined but insanely codependent qpr!! they are incapable of being normal about each other in a way that romance just cannot properly describe. they probably wouldn't define it as a qpr themselves, but they are "together" in the same way the strings of a tapestry are together. completely intertwined, unable to separate without unraveling the whole thing.

[welcometogrouchland]

Its all good man, I'm major busy atm too. Good point about how Steph's gender is a core part of her character in the sense that her female relationships are as important as, say, her experiences with gendered violence. I think a lot about her relationship to female mentorship, re: Cass, Dinah and Babs. All very complex relationships with a lot of rough patches but you can tell that when they're good, especially w/ the batgirls, all of them feel very...seen, I guess. Encouraged.

But yeah Steph and Nocturna's dynamic has been revisited approximately twice since this initial arc and i find both instances interesting but lackluster- there's one post-crisis in the gotham gazette mini, which is sort of a thematic prologue to Steph's batgirl run (lots of talk about how Steph's been left behind by the batfamily but is still fighting, how people return to Gotham despite everyrhing fkr a second chance- all of which shows up in Steph's BG run). Nocturna's comitting a robbery, Steph stops her (and weirdly has invisibility tech?? That she stole and is never brought up again??? Okay?) Its overall not a very significant interaction, just interesting that they pull on nocturna as a rogue for Steph instead of any of her dad's gang. I like that.

(Gotham Gazette: Batman Alive? #1)

Post-Flashpoint (and post-rebirth and infinite frontier...i think?) Steph and Nocturna interact in road to dark crisis #1 where we have a story about Nocturna taking advantage of Batmans 'death' to rob a museum, only to have a sort of hostile heart-to-heart with Steph, who talks her out of it. It's an interesting little appearance for multiple reasons? It seemingly tries to canonize every version of nocturna as one, using pre-crisis nocturna as a reference for flashback art, referencing her robin 93 version by having her already know Steph (and know her civilian name too weirdly? HC that was one of the things Steph told Nocturna on the roof ig) AND referencing her post-52 version just via design and whatnot.

(road to dark crisis #1)

Certainly doesnt work continuity wise but that was kinda the motto with the dark crisis era soft reboot. Also implies Steph was chillin' with Jason's adoptive mom. Funny to me

Anyway it doesn't get too into the weeds of nocturna and Steph's history and in fact most of it is actually about how they're feeling about Batman being gone (so, second time they've reunited post-batman seemingly dying. If i had a nickle, etc etc).

It's interesting to contrast how Steph feels in dark crisis compared to how she expressed herself in, say, world's finest #4, and it's also interesting that even tho Nocturna tries to needle Steph's insecurities (and she doesn't let it get to her, which, good for her!) implying she's inferior to the "real heroes", Nocturna seems to bring out some vulnerability in Steph.

It feels like it could tie into her whole ~lower inhibitions~ thing she had going on (could've been a cute use of the spoiler ninja mask actually) but that's not really said.

(road to dark crisis #1)

(sidenote: Clayton Henry is a very talented artist but man this may be the absolute worst the spoiler suit has ever looked post-flashpoint. Too shiny, Symbol is an off-purple shade and overlapping the paneling, no texture on the paneling. Frightening stuff here)

Again it's just an interesting pull for a Steph rogue and also interesting to me that they keep pairing nocturna with Steph during times of uncertainty/upheaval in Steph's life (not counting their first meeting which is actually one of the more stable periods of Steph's on-page life probably), considering how pre-52 nocturna was all about getting people to Reveal Truths n junk (via her weird girl astrology and pheremone powers).

Neither interaction references the 'sisterhood' they once shared (which makes sense bc it was only a few days in canon and ended w/ nat getting sent to S.T.A.R labs by Steph) but it still feels like there's untapped potential there between the two of them.

Finally re-reading Robin 101-104 (the nocturna arc) bc I remember being intrigued but overwhelmed the first time and looking back I really, really enjoy it (it's timsteph at their most enjoyable and has decent balance between the conflict in Tim's life and the inner workings of Steph's life, which was always unequal in Dixon's robin to the point of being slightly infuriating) but an interesting addendum to what you were saying a bit ago visa vie Steph's costume: Nocturna keeps saying to Steph "I see the colours you wear" as a means of arguing that her and Steph have some Fundamental Aspect in common. Which is potentially connected to womenhood/feminity? Said bc Natalia calls her "little sister" during the second time she mentions the colours Steph wears and bc Steph connects hers and Natalia's experiences of gendered violence in her head. I also mentioned in my comments on that post that the pink/purple colour choice feels connected to Steph's status as the 'young girl' character of the batman cast at the time (since Cass' character actively subverts a lot of teen girl stereotypes that Steph's character more incorporates and is in conversation with, Buffy Summers-style) so that feels like a personal win lol. Tbh a connection between Steph and Nocturna over ~feminine energy~ is kind of fitting from a modern lens considering like, modern tiktok influencer 'woo woo crystal energy' spiritual girlie phrases and buzzwords that sucker young girls into believing a bunch of borderline medievalist garbage.

Which got me thinking about Steph and Nocturna and how brief their relationship is but how interesting it is and how it's been referenced and revisited briefly in modern continuity but that's a whole other can of worms. Wish someone would take the time at DC to sort out the continuity between Nocturna's tbh, pre-crisis post-crisis and post-flashpoint all feel so different I can't reconcile them really, even tho post-crisis and post-flashpoint are meant to be the same(?) now.

Anyway yeah. Random Steph and Nocturna thoughts as I reread this arc! Hope they give some food for thought

Thank you for this! Im always so happy to see I got an ask from you, you always have such great Steph takes and thoughts.

I totally get how this arc can feel overwhelming. On one hand, I adore how much detail and nuance Jon Lewis brings to the table when it comes to Steph, and I definitely appreciate how we get so much of her internal monologue aside Tims, really emphasizing her perspective as a valid and important one. (As you point out, this stands fairly in contrast to Dixons approach). But on the other hand: there’s so much fucking internal dialogue. Swaths of it. It’s a lot sometimes, especially when it’s not broken up, and (for me at least) is sometimes easy to get lost reading.

(Also have to confess something: i didn’t realize Natalia was meant to be a version of Nocturna. Whoops. Definitely good to know, thanks.)

Big fan of the take about Stephs costume and femininity. Especially fun to look at this in contrast to Cass. Like you mentioned, Cass stands in contrast to the expected archetypes and trappings of a teen girl character, while Steph tends to conform to them. (Which is especially ironic to me given Cass begins with the explicitly gendered title ‘Batgirl’ while Spoiler is gender neutral.)

Steph being a female character is (for better or worse) essential to how her character is treated on every level. Misogyny and especially sexualization and sexual violence are kind of core parts of her character. Unlike Cass, Steph isnt detached from femininity, she is constantly reasserted to be part of it and hurt by her association with it, both through the sexual violence she is threatened with consistently and more than that through the way she can be narratively treated, dumbed down and villainized and discarded when convenient.

But Steph’s ‘femaleness’ can also be core to her character in a (somewhat) positive way. Her strongest familal relationship (while rocky) is by far her relationship with her mother. While pretty much every male relative in her life we see is some degree of absolutely shitty, Crystal and Steph’s relationship is deep and compelling and genuinely touching.

One of the first missions she gave herself as Spoiler was to track down Jim Murray: for the specific reason of protecting other young girls he might try to prey upon.

So given that, I’m interested the read of Steph’s femininity as connected to the purple of her costume. Given how often is Steph doomed or defined by her femininity I think it’s interesting to have it grounded in her costumes coloration as well, for better or worse.

Anyways, another bit of the connection between Nocturna and Steph and femininity which you got me thinking of is the moment where Steph tries to contact Natalia’s mother.

Maybe it’s just because I’ve had Crystal and Steph’s relationship on the brain so much recently, but it’s so interesting to me that Steph thinks to try to contact Natalias mom.

Especially as a character who we know spent a long long time seeing Crystal as unreliable or unsafe to confide in, and who Steph is at times more accustomed to seeing as someone she has to take care of instead of Vice versa.

Maybe this is because they’re in between these rough points right now. Steph is probably experiencing a high point in their relationship. (Crystal is clean and present, they’ve commiserated over how shitty Arthur is, and Steph has gotten a lot more time getting used to her mom wanting to be there for her.)

Good point about the whole ‘feminine energy’ spiritualistic stuff w Noctura retaining relevance, huge agree.

Their relationship is just generally very interesting, with the ‘little sister’ of course, and Steph seeing Natalia as a child to some degree, and their connection through music. I also find her convo w Steph with the stars just so enduringly touching, definitely a highlight for me.

(And who fucking knows w continuity at this point. It’s rough out here. Also, didn’t know her and Steph’s interactions had been revisited, that’s very interesting, good to know.)

Anyway great thoughts as always, thanks for the ask, and sorry this took like literally forever to respond to I’ve been stupid busy.

[sukibenders]

The way people are becoming anti-children nowadays is really sad. And I'm not talking about people not wanting to have kids of their own, that's fine and something that shouldn't be shamed nor up to someone else to debate. No, I'm talking about the people who adamantly hate these little humans for simply existing, wanting to ban them from spaces due to them having emotional reactions that they are still learning to understand (you know, the kind of lessons that everyone had to learn and figure out at one point). It's gotten to the point where I've even seen these types of people genuinely support children being harmed and deny their hurt under the consensus of "Well then maybe they shouldn't be there," in your average public space. Like, imagine thinking hating on children, people who need assistance and guidance, is something to be proud of.