#it's about the montage of all of the people the doctor has let down
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aletterinthenameofsanity · 10 months ago
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Me, to my new date: doctor who thinks it's a sci-fi story because the Doctor thinks it's a sci-fi story and because the companions think it's a sci-fi story, but it's really just a story about ghosts. a story about an ancient creature carrying the ghosts of everyone they have ever loved, meeting new people, and seeing them only as future ghosts. they are haunted by the future and the past and the present because they are the only constant in a world constantly in flux, and they are running as fast as they can to things before they burn and fade to dust but everything will always end, you understand, because this is the only thing the Doctor understands and yet they keep going. they love too much to stop. doctor who is not science-fiction, it's horror and optimism and spiritual more than anything else, it's religious unto itself, the TARDIS is a haunted house and a church and a graveyard and a hospital and the Doctor is the most haunted being in the universe but more than anything, this is a love story, because how can you love something without being haunted by it- hey, what are you doing?
My date, shoving breadsticks in their purse: I have to go-
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mistresslrigtar · 8 months ago
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Master Work List 2024
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One-shots inspired by song prompts featuring various Zelinks throughout the ages.
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First chapter is up! Read on AO3 This is a sequel to my modern rock star au I Belong to You. Read it here on AO3 before September 1st. Weekly updates.
Summary:
As Zelda begins her doctoral fellowship at the Ghirahim Institute, she finds its founder’s intentions toward her may extend beyond professional admiration. Meanwhile, Link is forced to step in as the frontman for his band, Hyrule Warriors, when crucial member Revali decides to go solo.
They'll face the ultimate test of their relationship when they find themselves juggling their demanding careers and being caught in the midst of a scandalous tabloid storm.
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Summary:
Link is a down on his luck pirate with a bounty on his head large enough he could buy an island. He thinks his luck may have changed when the fallen King Gustaf Harkinian implores Link and his crew to rescue his daughter, Zelda, before she's forced to wed the usurper of the crown, Ganondorf Dragmire.
Link isn’t as interested in a princess, all prim, proper, and boring as he is in obtaining treasure beyond his wildest dreams. However his tune quickly changes when he sees her and decides to woo her. Too bad she thinks he’s a dirty rotten scoundrel.
Read Captain Link Araki and the Harbinger of Destiny
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Summary:
A written montage of snapshot moments between Link and Zelda post-TotK, as they come to terms with the traumatic events of the Upheaval and slowly rediscover each other and their love. How many times can two people be forced to start their lives over?
Each chapter will be under 1k, so easy to read. Read Third Time's a Charm
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Summary:
Link’s stride slows to a stop as he holds her gaze. “Would you care to play hide and seek with us, Princess?”
Zelda blinks down at him, feeling a flush creep from her breast to burn her cheeks. Did he just ask her if she wanted to play? No one has ever before asked her that question–either in her past life or this new one.
Read Playtime With Zelda
Summary:
When Sophie’s son was born he didn’t cry and his skin was the dusty hue of blue nightshade after it’s been hung up to dry.
Sophie was determined she’d make the most of the time she had with him and nurture his spirit as best she could. She’d instill in him the kindness and compassion that his father possessed. Tucked away in the rolling foothills of the Lanayru Mountain range, she would shield him from the harsh realities of the world outside for as long as possible.
of recipes and courage is a companion piece to my series collab with the fantastic @bahbahhh ! Read mine and then click on the the series to read hers about Zelda's mother, the Queen
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Summary:
Across Time - A zelink timeline project - Tears of the Kingdom
Zelda and Link have been so busy rebuilding Hyrule they’ve hardly had any time for themselves. When they’re invited to officiate the first annual Tarrey Town hot air balloon festival, they jump at the chance, hoping for some well-deserved alone time while there. Of course, it doesn’t go exactly as planned.
Read Just Our Luck
My collab piece with the amazing @zeldaelmo for ZAT!
Summary:
Across Time: A Zelink Timeline Project — Skyward Sword
Zelda sneaks away to prepare for her performance during the Wing Ceremony, hoping Link heeds her advice to practice flying with his Loftwing. Link, however... well, let's just say that's not exactly how it's going.
Read Practice for Keeps
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Summary:
It's an annual tradition in Hateno for women to offer gifts of appreciation to those they care about on Sowing Day. Little does Zelda know that the gift she gives Link expresses more than platonic affection. Will she realize that perhaps he means more to her than she has dared to realize?
Read Sowing Sees of Love
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Summary:
Zelda surprises Link with an unexpected birthday celebration in a hidden courtyard of the castle. Written for my birthday prompt.
Read Moonlit Interlude
Marital Bliss at its Finest Summary:
Zelda tasks Link with the daunting task of building her secret study, but all he really wants to do is take a break. Written for CJRacing.
Hyrule Warriors Dénouement of War 'zine one-shots
Trials for a Chosen Hero summary:
Unlike Princess Zelda, Impa’s not so certain Link is the Chosen Hero. She puts him through his paces to test his limits. Will he prove himself worthy enough to wear the Hero’s garb?
Unconditional Summary:
How deep is a horse’s love? Just a sweet one-shot from Epona's POV after a long day's travel.
Residents of the Wild 'zine one-shot
Champions at Play Summary:
Today, a frazzled Professor Symin does his best to be heard over the cacophony of his young students' voices. His latest lesson plan, that he thought would lead to animated discussions and speak to his students' creative sides, has proven to only incite them to heated debates. As a matter of fact, he wonders if his idea to produce a school play reenacting the defeat of Calamity Ganon will ever come to fruition, and is beginning to rue the day he ever introduced the notion to his students. 
Drabble Challenge
Summary:
A collection of short, easily digestible one-shots
Previous lists:
Master Work 2023
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princess-of-the-corner · 4 months ago
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Quirk Awakenings
Because ya know what? Fuck it! If they ain’t gonna give us solid explanations, I'mma make my own until told otherwise! At least to get The thoughts out so they stop spinning in my head!
So! What’s a “Quirk Awakening”?
Well, it seems to be when a Quirk gets stronger, obviously. But not gradually, through training, but all at once. Usually in response to a perceived threat, or if the person in question is under extreme duress - usually physical, though emotional or mental seems to count in a few cases. So, we’ll say a “Quirk Awakening” is a survival mechanism, a response to a threat, meant to ensure someone’s survival. Similar to an “adrenaline rush” in us regular humans, the kind of thing that let’s mothers move whole cars off trapped children, or lets a human survive almost being frozen solid, or losing a limb. The part of the human body and psyche that makes us go “Not Today, Bitch!” and then perform some sort of god-mode glitch we will never be able to replicate. 
Of course, such actions have consequences. Like, that mother absolutely saved her trapped kid. She also wrecked all the muscles in her arms and back, and will need a lot of physical therapy to recover. So, do Quirk Awakenings have that? Do they effect people that way??
No Idea! Cause what the FUCK do Quirk Awakenings look like, really? They seem wildly different for everyone - which makes sense! No one has the exact same Quirk! But like. What counts as an “Awakening”? Kirishima has his “Unbreakable” mode, which yes, he got through training. But he trained by hardening up, and having people use him as a punching bag. He put himself under duress, to improve his Quirk! Does that count as an Awakening?? Izuku has random power jumps all over the place, as new Quirks come in - does that count? No clue!
Honestly, the only thing that sticks out to me, the thing that makes me think, and tentatively codify this, is Iida.
Hear me out.
So, there’s that scene where Tensei tells his little brother about a “secret technique” that will make him stronger. Normally, in Shonen manga like this, that sort of thing leads to a training montage, mastering some “hidden art” or finding a new understanding. They’ll condense it down, but it’s implied to take a long time, or it should. But that’s not what Tensei tells Tenya. No, the super special “secret technique”? Rip out his mufflers, so they’ll grow back stronger. When I first saw this, I was like “what????”. That doesn’t seem like “training” to me - that’s a little extreme, especially if you watch that scene! Iida has cloth in his mouth, a first aid kit next to him, and IS CLEARLY IN AGONY. He’s sweating, tense, he looks like he’s about to cry. There’s BLOOD. Not to mention the setting, I was absolutely flabbergasted. I questioned why the HELL Iida was out in the woods doing this - if it’s known about in his family, then why isn’t Iida being sedated in a sterile environment? Why isn’t there a trusted doctor team HELPING with this?
Then I thought about it more, and I think I know what it is.
The Iida family’s “secret technique” is them forcing their bodies through a semi-controlled “Quirk Awakening”.
A Quirk Awakening only seems to really happen when a person is put under duress. A “Do or Die” situation. When they don’t have a choice but to either fight back, or fall. Uraraka is implied to get one in the manga, making a Sort of “field” around her where she controls the gravity, without her having to touch anything. Bakugou gets one at some point, seeming to gain the ability to control his sweat, waterbender style, to create explosions at a distance, with better control. Both of them were in situations where they, quite possibly, could have (or should have) died. They were put in a situation where they were told “live or die”, and hit that survival threshold that lets people do insane shit when threatened. So, this Iida Family Secret Technique? It’s mimicking that, which means it really only works when done in suboptimal conditions.
Think about it. The Iida family are one of the older hero families. Why would they hurt themselves like that unless there wasn’t another option? The Engine Quirk has probably gone through a few iterations, some of them likely had their mufflers ripped out while Heroing. They probably noticed that the mufflers that grew back were stronger. Some of them probably figured the “grew back stronger” and tried to do the same in controlled conditions, and I bet you anything it didn’t work. They grew back barely stronger, the same, or maybe not at all. Cause In controlled conditions? You’re safe, and you know it. There isn’t that pressure, that drive that forces your body past its limits. The thing that says “we need to be stronger RIGHT NOW”. It only really works when you put yourself in conditions that force a similar feeling of duress as an actual fight - hence Iida going into UA’s back yard with a first aid kit and no painkillers, without telling anyone where he was going or what he was doing.
This also made me think, that a Quirk Awakening? Is more like a rapid Quirk “Evolution” or “Advancement”. It’s your Quirk jumping ahead to save your life, regardless of how trained you are, or if you were “evolved” enough to handle it. I think it’s totally possible to train to the same (or at least similar) level you would get from a Quirk Awakening but it takes time, effort. It’s that same Quirk Awakening, but done slower, letting everything adjust and grow more gradually. Like, if you go through a proper Quirk Awakening? It’s like a growth spurt during puberty, suddenly your balance sucks, everything is stretched and it hurts, you’re hungry and tired - your body has developed rapidly, not really giving you time to adjust for it, making you play catch up with yourself. To use Kirishima as an example, if, say, during the USJ, Kiri had been put in a situation where he needed that Unbreakable Mode? I bet you he’d unlock it. But I also bet, afterward, he’d be sore, maybe dry skin, tense muscles, need to eat for three and sleep for a week. Iida probably needed to almost relearn how to run with the new mufflers, needed to stretch more, drink more OJ, his whole legs were sore, not just where he tore the mufflers out.
So, like, another example - Let’s say Sero goes through a Quirk Awakening. Well, what happens? His tape gets better, obviously, stronger, he can make more of it, but what else? Well, he’s already flexible, and I posit part of his Quirk is his joints - like, his Tape comes from his elbows. So he gets more flexible, especially in the joints, but what if the tape needs to come from somewhere else? Well (I’m almost sorry for sharing this, but I had the thought, and I refuse to shudder alone) how about the path of least resistance - his nails? Instead of just finger- and toenails, now they shoot tape too. How about his wrists, or ankles? Spread it to every joint.
What about Tokoyami? Does the bird thing get more prominent? Does he get talons? Wings? Does Dark Shadow change in anyway?
We’ve all posited that Hagakure’s Invisibility could do something crazy - it’s light refraction. Could she change colours? Create illusions? Hell, a laser? Could she CONTROL light, through reflection and refraction? A mirror and a torch, and she can make a mirage?
(Running out of thoughts, so would love to hear your feedback! Specifically, how you think this fits with Touya [both Sports Festival and AfO’s Fuckery] and Kurogiri. Also Tomura, cause, like. Look at him)
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OH HELL YEAH
Honestly there do seem to be some exceptions to the ‘survival’ thing in a way. Specifically thinking about Toya because even in Canon, his fire went from red to blue out of emotional distress, but not life-or-death(though he immediately wass put in a life-or-death situation right after lmao). And this carries through to Chaos Children, though the circumstances change it’s still emotional distress and pure determination.
Also I totally forgot about the ripping the engines out like OOF but yeah it makes sense that a family of Heroes who have been in fucked situations like that would click on to a way to kinda. Force an Awakening.
But also at the same time, people are in distressing situations like that a lot. Especially Heroes and Villains they’d be getting Awakenings left and right. They don’t always get Awakenings. I actually brought this up recently in Road to Hell! Enji’s first thought on how to deal with his weaknesses was actually to try and force an Awakening in his own Quirk, but decided that because he’s been through distressing enough situations without one, that there must be something else that would trigger an Awakening.
And yeah my thoughts on it are that there’s multiple options for where an Awakening can go! to show with what I mentioned before re: Toya’s different Awakenings and also Kurogiri:
In both Toya’s first Awakening and then the Oboro to Kurogiri thing, that’s an evolution of their pre-existing Quirk. Toya’s Quirk evolves from just regular red-orange fire, to hotter blue flames. Oboro’s Cloud ads on abilities to protect himself and to escape danger, becoming Warp Gate.
But with Toya’s second Awakening in CC, there’s not really anywhere for his Quirk to evolve in terms of just fire. Like in theory it could evolve the fireproofing, but it didn’t have that in the first place. It’d be adding something ‘new’ rather than changing what’s there. So instead the Awakening dug into dormant genetics. Even though it didn’t initially show up on Toya, the bits and pieces for his grandfather’s Quirk are still in his DNA and if he somehow had a bio kid there’s a chance of the Quirk showing up again. So the Awakening tapped into that instead, bringing the genetics to the surface and adding it to his Quirk.
This is what I feel would happen in the latter suggestions you mentioned like Sero getting an Awakening. There’s little room for his Quirk to evolve drastically, so instead it would dig into whatever’s lying dormant in his genetics.
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casliveblog · 13 days ago
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Custom Toonami Block Week 196 Rundown
The Witch from Mercury: The group continues to try to infilitrate Quiet Zero but it turns out everyone in the corporate world had a Death Star in their back pocket just waiting for the battle of the teenager drama queens to break out so they had an excuse to use them. The Space UN has their own giant laser ready to just blow up Miorine’s dad’s whole deal and let the creepy cult ladies and Real!Ceres take over so we got a Death Star vs Starkiller base situation going on since this one eats solar energy and craps world destroying beams. Suletta desperately tries to get through to Eri while Chuchi drives without wifi to shuttle everyone inside and something unspecified stops Eri from blowing them up right off the bat. Meanwhile Guel and Lauda are still having their family fight and Lauda’s just like “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU KILLED DAD DID YOU THINK I’D GO CRAZY OR SOMETHING!?” and Guel’s just like “Of course not, you’re clearly handling it very well right now” and they really made me think they might actually kill Guel for a second there but luckily their girl has anti-explosion charges ready to stop his dramatic death and seal their family problems for now. Miorine breaks into the Death Star and they fight Prospera and eventually end up hacking a world-destroying superweapon with tomatoes or some shit, I don’t get it but hacking montages are all nonsense anyway so at least this one’s thematically relevant. Miorine tells Prospera she’s a bitch of a mother-in-law and turns out Miorine’s dad is up and about enough to fake a Zoom call for a few minutes to distance the group from the literal Death Star but the bad guy with the most punchable face in the world fires Starkiller Base anyway and Eri blocks it with her ultimate wifi shield though it blows her up in the end because in the end the thirst to kill people for war was stronger than the thirst to kill people for peace.  
Ranma ½: It’s Ranma’s first day of school and it’s time to flesh out all the secondary love interests now that we’ve got the premise and main pairing down. First Ranma runs into Dr. Tofu (seriously is that an actual name?) we don’t get much on him but he’s a deceptively strong but gentle doctor and seemingly the only male presence Akane’s actually fond of. Next we kinda get some insight on why Akane’s kinda done with the whole male gender as she’s greeted by every athlete in the school trying to fight her every morning because resident Kendo President Kuno told them only the person that defeats her can date her and I kinda don’t get it like Akane’s cute and high school boys like a challenge I guess but she doesn’t seem ‘every boy in the school willingly gets the shit beat out of them every day for her’ pretty. Anyway Ranma and Kuno fight and they seem even-ish (the powerscaling in this show is kinda weird because they have to mix it with comedy) but gender shenanigans ensue as it starts to rain and it hadn’t occurred to me that they had to keep Ranma’s girl identity secret, like I thought that’d be an open thing but the whole double life deal is kind of another wrinkle. The whole school eventually finds out Ranma and Akane are ‘engaged’ and I know arranged marriages are a thing but is it still legal in Japan to literally force someone to get married against their will? Either way Kuno and Ranma fight again but end up getting interrupted when Ranma’s death-defying third story kung fu jump actually lands him in the pool which is technically safer but gives him his extra floaties no ones allowed to see. Still through some shenanigans and Akane trying to help keep Ranma undercover, Kuno gets his shit kicked in by Girl!Ranma and ends up falling in love with her because old-school love triangles are so passé, this is a THREE DIMENSIONAL love triangle with the gender identities of participants swapping around and that’s kinda fun, like I feel like it’ll get old real quick and they’ll never quite address the confusion this places on Ranma but for now it’s fun and his and Akane’s relationship is inching a little more familiar even if they’re still in ‘stupid baka’ tsundere levels.
Castlevania: It’s final fight time, Ratko and Varney attack the Underground Court while Germain’s forces siege Castlevania while he does human transmutation upstairs where Dracula died. Trevor fights Ratko and takes way too long to use the awesome new weapon he just grabbed, resulting in the death of that one lady who finally came to her senses and is like “I have a heroic sacrifice now, we good right?’ and bitch no, you did one good thing after months of running an insane kangaroo court and abusing your people, we’re not square, like I’m not mad at you but I’m not gonna scream your name (whatever it was) and do a rallying cry of “AVENGE HER” during the final battle. Meanwhile the other forces attack Alucard’s castle with a foreskin monster that looks like those giant demonic chicken things in Lost Izaleth that no one bothers fighting, so they have to move inside the castle. Alucard legit finds Germain in his childhood bedroom gloating how he can by his own admission sacrifice dozens of people and create an abomination against god just so he can get his dick wet. I don’t think I like Evil Germain very much, much less interesting, much hornier, bad show. Alucard doesn’t have the time or mental faculty to process all THAT shit so he goes to help people not die from the foreskin demon. Meanwhile Trevor finally finds his new weapon upgrade and uses it to kill Ratko while Varney finds the big transportation mirror and jumps through it (I mean there are other big transportation mirrors, was that really the only one available to them? Seems like a lot of work for a glorified bus ride, like they KNEW where they were gonna be doing this, why didn’t they just meet up ahead of time?) either way Trevor and Sypha jump through the mirror too and all the protagonists are finally back in one place, whoo.
Dandadan: Since Momo is not ready to process the guy she’s been thrust into a supernatural plot with having the same name as her celebrity crush, Ken gets the nickname Okarun to make this all flow more smoothly. The two realize they’ve literally been up all night fighting aliens and go to resident Oshino-style apparition hunter Momo’s Grandma’s house for help, having to lower the protection against evil spirits to get Okarun in since he’s technically an evil spirit now. The two bond a bit and Momo tells him she’d still hang out with him even if they weren’t in horrible danger and literally contractually obligated to not get more than a few feet away from each other right now. Something I like about the characterization in this show is they are kind of hilariously petty and dorky and will fight over silly things but they’re also very chill with each other and don’t start shit over nothing, a lot of the time the ‘you can insult your friends’ trope kinda runs too hard and seems like veiled abuse but here it’s really silly and wrapped in such genuine care it’s nice. Anyway they get attacked by a Sumo Alien and it turns out aliens and evil spirits basically work on the same rules so if they can get the barrier back up it’ll be cool. They try to use Okarun’s Hollow Senku powers to stop it but it just turns him into a depressed Zoomer and he can’t hold onto it long enough to get a definitive blow. Eventually through teamwork and Momo Tatsumaki-ing her way through the alien’s Jet Gatling long enough to dig a hole in the wall they do get rid of it but the exhaustion catches up with Momo and she passes out, letting Okarun’s curse run free in the decidedly un-zoomer way.
Delicious in Dungeon: The group don’t have much time to contemplate their new species and ages before they’re attacked by the Gargoyles again and find that they ARE the changeling mushrooms so creating a ring with their bodies also changes things which is a fun little mechanic though I question the biology of that, but yeah much like Resident Evil 8 it turns out the real mushrooms were the friends we made along the way. They kinda figure out off-screen that they can just… take a bath and get rid of the mushroom spores, like they even say it’s an anti-climactic answer in-universe but I guess it is a logical next step from discovering you have magic mushroom spore powers and eating changeling variety roulette dumplings. They get on a dwarven trolley and Laios gives the cliffnotes of his backstory while Marcille realizes just how much she misses Falin and how much they meant to each other. Senshi comes up with the idea that if they kill Falin again and only eat the dragon parts, digestion works as a kind of ‘unbinding’ for magic so it literally beaks down the dragon bits to not be able to regenerate anymore. I have questions about this since Falin’s bones are all that are left of ‘her’ and she’s way smaller than the dragon even now even though they only ate a small slab of the dragon meat but far be it from me to question digestion magic. But yeah, we’ve had “We must slay the dragon”, we’ve had “We must fuck the dragon”, now we have “We must EAT the dragon”! That’s where we end the season, just deciding to use the power of friendship to eat Falin, good times.
Gleipnir: We immediately jump back into the fight already in progress, getting enough of a flashback of this girl who’s attacking them and the flashback’s like 50% pantyshots but long story short she’s a runner and got stronger with the coins but isn’t into having demon claws so she wants to un-monkey’s paw her powers with more coins and just FUCKING HAPPENS to overhear Clair dumping exposition last episode, like holy shit the contrivance, I know coincidences that get the protagonists into trouble instead of out of it are supposed to be fair game but that’s kind of a stretch. Anyway Clair maces runner girl and Shuuchi is not down to do a murder so they run and runner girl chases after them even though, like, she’s in Clair’s apartment, she could just wait for her to come back or at least take a shit in her bed or something, alternatively Clair and Shuuichi could go to the police but getting them involved in Mascot Monster Murder Mayhem 2015 is probably not the best idea even though that’s exactly why she’s chasing them. They exposit for a bit and Clair unzips his mascot outfit and makes a gratuitous amount of sex puns about slipping into his meat curtains and runner girl just kinda… finds them… somehow, never explained. Unfortunately for her the two are now a gundam and the perfect combination: a beta male in a furry suit and a sociopath, truly an unstoppable combo. They beat the shit out of her and it becomes very clear just what a fucking unhinged bitch Clair is like she’d probably be doing half this shit without the furry suit but yeah they don’t get any more exposition out of runner girl so they snap her leg and Clair pulls a giant gun out of nowhere and shoots her, so if she just had a gun I guess the whole melee brawl was just for kicks. Shuuchi is very uncomfortable that they just did a murder but Clair has the post-coitous glow of disemboweling a barely established but still relatively ignorant human being with a giant revolver. They try to salvage this and pretend it’s not just abuse with Clair basically making a suicide pact with Shuuichi but part of me’s not buying it, like throw all the panty shots you want at me I don’t fucking trust Clair. She made it very clear this was a relationship of convenience and kinda gaslit Shuuichi into thinking the world’s gonna be out to get him even though it’s her fault runner girl found out about him and even her stunt to try and jump off a warehouse balcony to pretend to die with him probably wouldn’t have done more than break her legs, like girl is an insane amount of crazy and if they’re actually trying to play that side of the relationship straight I may pull out my hair. Also Clair’s sister has a crush on Shuuichi and made the wish that turned him into a furry or something idk.
Revolutionary Girl Utena: Wakaba’s back in the story after like six episodes and you bet it’s for plot relevance as Touga sets his sights on her as the weak link in Utena’s group. Meanwhile Utena still feels weird about Touga saving her and hates his guts but also wonders if he might be heroic like her ideal prince deep down, no one can seem to get a read on Touga and even the other evil council members are trying to figure out how far his Aizen planning goes between getting Saiyonji expelled and having Nanami lose her duel. He confronts Anthy, claiming she needs to do nothing but be a pretty trophy and Utena tells her to stand up to him and she does but he’s like “Aha she stood up to me just like her fiancée wanted, such an obedient bride” like you can’t really win on that one since Anthy never really puts her foot down on anything, like it’s clear she has other interests but she also doesn’t as vehemently reject her position as Utena does for her. Utena still thinks Touga’s her flashback prince even though she literally depicts him in her memories with completely different hair and mannerisms and it combined with Touga giving mixed signals leads to a weird sexual tension between them when he’s like “I’mma kiss you nah on second thought let’s fight with swords at dawn.” Though spending some time with Anthy and having her finally express an independent thought to branch out more and make more friends motivates her enough to say she don’t need no man and she’s gonna protect her girlfriend even if it fucks up her backstory. Still, when the duel comes and Touga dances around her until she tries to use the Dios Thrust, he abandons the will to fight her and she loses her will to strike him as well, only for him to cut her rose off at the last second. Utena still thinks she can salvage something and asks Touga to free Anthy out of the goodness of his heart and take whatever reward he can without her. However Touga reveals something kind of complicated, Anthy’s a blank slate and not only didn’t feel any need for freedom but COULDN’T, she’s just a mirror that reflects what the person who owns her gives her and the slice of life shenanigans and budding desire for freedom where just Utena’s projections onto her. Now this does kinda ring true a bit since Anthy never really expressed much of the wishes Utena was talking about and just kinda nodded along, not that Utena’s wrong for suggesting it, she’s the only person who genuinely wants what’s best for Anthy and even if that’s a projection she knows it wasn’t ALL fake, Anthy declaring a wish for friendship on her own was real, her horrible cooking was real, glimmers of joy within her were real and that’s enough for Utena to resolve to get her back.
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prongsmydeer · 1 year ago
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Ayesha Liveblogs the Good Place S1-S2
I’ve watched this first ep like three times and it took me until now to realize Michael is probably named after the show creator lmao
“One of the other people in your neighbourhood is your actual soulmate, and you will spend eternity together.” I just noticed Eleanor turning around and checking out Jianyu 
What happens if you were already married to your soulmate? Do they have a separate afterlife for singles 
“Why does she still have that accent? No one else here has an accent.” Chidi’s accent should definitely sound more Senegalese or at the very least have the tinge of a Francophone if there’s any accent retention after-death
Love how even when Tahani and Eleanor are being snarky about each other it’s through the lens of finding each other cute:
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Unclear if the look on Jianyu/Jason’s face is guilt or worry for himself lol:
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“It’s merely the construct of a dog. It feels no pain, or joy, or love.” This is because all dogs are in the Other Good Place LOL
Honestly I’m with Eleanor I didn’t realize Chidi ever had his own apartment in this show lol
“I won’t let you down... starting now.” I enjoy that Chidi’s face is a cross between ‘what have I gotten myself into’ and genuinely endeared by Eleanor’s ridiculousness
“I got a present for you... Senegal.” “That’s not a present; that’s just common decency.” Talking to white people really be like that sometimes
“I have what doctors call ‘directional insanity.” I’m Chidi, Chidi is me
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I admire Jason’s prolonged stoicism lmao that takes dedication 
“Basically my life’s work is 3,600 pages of garbage.” Every writer has this feeling every so often LOL
“Not to mention, you have a rockin’ bod.” I really do hope they make a point of Eleanor being bisexual 
Lmao the transition from Jianyu to Jason is INCREDIBLE someone give Manny Jacinto an Emmy 
“Everyone here thinks I’m Taiwanese. I’m Filipino. That’s racist. Heaven is so racist.” GOD THE WRITING ON THIS SHOW IS INCREDIBLE
“Is she single, or is she married to Michael?” Team Jason/Janet 4ever
The depiction of Florida on this show is right on brand with everything I have ever imagined about Florida 
The hope on Eleanor’s face when Chidi offers Jason a lifeline GOD we love a man
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“I am here to learn about ethnics.” Everything Jason says is so funny I’m losing my mind
Kristen Bell is really the only person who can pull off this role of being so excited for doing the bare minimum of human decency and actually make it endearing 
Based on Michael’s timing of showing up every time Eleanor and Chidi are mid-argument I wonder how much of his day is just dedicated to creeping on them in preparation for dramatic moments lmao
“It’s very... middle thermometer.” They’ve managed to capture my South Asian parent-child experience in less than ten words lmao 
Disclaimer/sidenote: Despite saying this, I am exhausted of the way people in western media write South Asian parents lmao. Give me an Ek Ladkhi scene where the parents are also willing to beat down people who insult their kids. It’s so one-sided:
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Rich people are wild I cannot imagine giving up millions of dollars just because my parents loved me less than my sibling. Even if you didn’t want the money it could serve so much use to other people
I love how down Eleanor is to have sex with any person she meets given the right circumstances
“I know we’ll never be soulmates, but we’re friends.” ARE YOU SURE ELEANOR
“How do you row a boat?” With great difficulty; oars are very heavy
Which woman is so hard up for available friends that they would entrust Early Eleanor with a dog with kidney disease
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“She’s so pretty like Nala from the Lion King.” The levels to this comment
"Three person couple.” “Does not compute.” Janet said no polyamory rights kjhkjhkjhjk
I really enjoy this montage of Michael and Eleanor enjoying human activities they are truly #friendgoals lmao
“Do you like France as much as I do?” “Well, they enslaved my country for 300 years, so no. But, they have great museums.” “Yes.” Tahani and Chidi’s conversation about France kills me lmao
I guess Tahani can’t really fault colonialism since she’s British LMAO
I like that they experiment with all the younger main characters together lmao there’s some implied chemistry in a lot of directions with Eleanor, Tahani, Chidi, Jason and Janet 
Fshjdghkjdshgkjhds
Eleanor: But leave up the sexy mailman. To remember me by.
Chidi: [nods seriously]
Janet’s delivery always kills me but her Count Chocula Sobs and whispered confident, “Yeah,” is truly something else:
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“Those are the coolest boots I’ve ever seen in my life.” I’m so Chidi sometimes u catch urself telling very pointless lies for either a very mediocre reason or no reason at all just because ur caught up in a conversation and can’t stop saying things to fill the silence and then later it haunts u
“Killing is one of the most famous moral no-nos.” Every line of this show is beautifully written
KDJHFKSJHFKJ I love that this episode is the turning point for Chidi actually having his own moral failings
"And even if she were okay, it would be too painful for me to live with these lies.” CHIDI U HAVE BEEN LYING SINCE EP 1 LMAO IT’S A LITTLE LATE TO DECIDE U DON’T WANT TO
“The problem in the neighbourhood is me.” Say what you will about Eleanor at least in the afterlife she really cares about her friends:
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“You will spend eternity with murderers, arsonists, and people who take off their shoes and socks on commercial airlines.” By this metric, at least one member of my immediate family is going to The Bad Place
If, as by Michael’s measure of Eleanor we are counting on the impact of our actions and not just intentions (i.e. Eleanor making her cousin happy as a positive) then objectively it is bizarre that none of the good Tahani has done for others through charity or even just like, hosting events for other people, means anything in the afterlife. What gives
“You’re too nice to humiliate.” I feel like this is foreshadowing of Michael being a Ineffective Demon and Great Friend
“There should be a medium place for people like me who kind of sucked, but in a fun, chill way.” [Sad chuckle] “I agree.” Awwww Chidi is sad to see her go
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“You should smile more.” Adam Scott really has mastered the art of portraying an unpleasant man lmao
OMG CHIDI AND ELEANOR HOLDING HANDS WHEN SHE GETS OFF THE TRAIN
“You know, it doesn’t matter if you know things. All that matters is what’s in your heart.” Jason said Himbo/Bimbo rights
“Sorry you’re snorting the... concept of time?” I’m sure people on cocaine feel this way occasionally
“Who are they gonna believe, me, or a woman?” Men really do be like that sometimes 
“He’s the wise, eternal Judge who sits on high, has the final say on all disputes between our two realms.” “And his name is... Shawn?” The real tipping point for believing this is not The Good Place should’ve been how every person in charge of it is depicted as a white man lmao
Djfhkjh I forgot when Tahani found out about Jason. The end of episode reveals are great they really do know how to make you want to watch the next one 
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How does Tahani know every celebrity EXCEPT Ariana Grande lmao 
“Oh Ariana, we’re really in it now.” God. I love Jason so much 
“Hooking up with someone with the exact same name is kind of a fun, narcissistic fantasy, I could be into it.” [’NSYNC voice] bi bi bi
Who in their right mind would let Chidi be a team captain lmao
“Congratulations, Chidi. You filibustered recess.” Kjfgjdhgj teach them early  
Every time Eleanor mentions a political philosopher I had to study I feel sympathy for how truly boring they are lmao. Honestly I didn’t retain much
KJHFJHSKJHFKJHKJAHKJ ELEANOR’S MONOLOGUE ABOUT LOVING CHIDI LMAO
Chidi running away because two beautiful and fun women have expressed feelings for him, is really a my-diamond-shoes-are-too-tight scenario
Janet giving Jason his favourite kind of wings 💗 They’re so sweet
“So you also love Chidi? And you just told him, right before I did?” “Technically you told him that he loves you, but yes.” lmao u right Eleanor
Happy Pride Month to Tahani whose every interaction with a man screams of comphet LMAO
I know Eleanor and Tahani is not what they’re aiming for here but jhgkjhg:
Eleanor: Are you ready to take our bonding to the next level?
Tahani: [gay intrigue]
Ahhh Uzo is such a good friend he knows Chidi and he’s so chill about him being anxious I love this dynamic I feel bad that Chidi’s dead
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“Jianyu is a hot dummy, definitely my type.” LMAO I FORGOT ABOUT THIS AND ALSO ELEANOR REALLY WOULD SLEEP WITH ALL OF HER FRIENDS (EXCEPT MICHAEL OBVS) LMAO
OH MY GOOOOD POOR UZU AND A MONTH BEFORE HIS WEDDING TOO
“Does anyone here object to this marriage?” “Of course we do, how could we not object?” “Yes, it is a terrible idea.” “Overruled.” JANET KJHJKGHJKFH
Get someone who looks at you the way that Jason and Janet look at each other:
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“True love is what Janet and Jianyu have.” YEAH IT IS
Digital Getdown being on the Jasonet wedding playlist was really an iconic move
Really it has to be a very mundane kind of torture to having someone foist a love confession on you lmao but I guess [Sartre voice] Hell is other people 
“I got ten bucks to my name. I spent 8 of it on this burrito, and the other 2 on the guac.” Been there Pillboi
The fact that Jason thinks Michael is Janet’s dad kkjdhgkjhg 
“I wasn’t a failed DJ, I was pre-successful.” I want to live in Jason’s brain
God we love a man who has emotional intelligence. Jason may not have a lot of logical reasoning skills but he knows how to calm someone down and how to love 
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“Even when I do nice things, I’m only doing something so I get something out of it—the ability to stay here—which means none of this had any real moral value.” This is excellent Tahani foreshadowing but also I call bullshirt. 1) Doing good things inherently makes you feel better, so I think it would be very hard to find entirely selfless actions and 2) If you give care, time, or money to just causes and helping others whether you’re doing it for recognition or not you still have vastly improved someone’s life. It DOES count
“What if he reboots me and we fall out of love?” 😭😭😭 Let them be together!!!
Having Mindy live with her incurable addiction but be unable to fulfill it is a very medium thing to do
Eleanor’s first act of making herself comfortable in the Medium Place being putting photos of Tahani, Jason and Chidi 😭😭😭😭 She is SO endearing
Ajfhdkjhfsj Chidi immediately still wanting to jump in to defend Eleanor even after watching firsthand all the horrible things she did what kind of wholeass love and friendship
I have so many questions about where Janet’s genitals are located based on those diagrams, why did the second one not work
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“I brought you two a little treat.” Oh my god Michael in Janet’s outfit hjkhkjhgkjfdk
Also I know it’s meant to be some form of torture, and like remind them of their impending doom. But what I see is a guy giving his friends a little snack
“I’m sorry Eleanor, but I engaged a ride-or-die protocol, so I’m loyal to Jason forever.” Get u a wife like Janet
The real question is why they had Kristen Bell play her high school self in a flashback if they were going to cast a teenager to play her later anyway 
Also as much as I love Kristen Bell: Definitely not a high schooler LMAO 
Maybe to draw a distinction between things she purposely did without regard for other people (as her main self) vs. when she was subject to other people’s neglect as a kid 
“I was dropped into a cave, and you were my flashlight.” Eleanor saying goodbye with a reference to Plato’s Allegory of a Cave the ROMANCE
I’d heard that the actors didn’t know about the reveal until they shot this scene so I’d be curious to see if they broke at some point 
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“Didn’t you raise like, $1,000 for charity or whatever?” “60 billion actually. But it didn’t matter, because my motivations were corrupt.” Yeah call me a consequentialist but for one final time: I just can’t buy that doing nice things for a selfish reason COMPLETELY negates it??? Tangibly improving someone’s life situation, no matter what reason, seems like a good action. Fuck you Kant
“Side note, I might legit be into Tahani.” Tahani’s [gay surprise] expression oh my god 
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I love how quick Eleanor is to think on her feet. Improv master lmao
Hjhjhkjhkjhlkjh now reading the credits: Pleased that they cast a Bengali actress as a Real Eleanor (who said she was from Bangladesh—even though they were accurate for Manny Jacinto’s ethnicity I wasn’t really sure if they would be regionally specific, like as far as I know William Jackson Harper doesn’t specifically identify as Senegalese
Also: Kills me that Bambadjan’s real name is Bambadjan, which implies both that his name is better than whatever name they had in the script, and that he is playing himself
“Eleanor - Bad Place,” would actually be one letter less than “Eleanor, Find Chidi,” but I understand that the message is less about identifying the lie and more about finding morality and her friends
We are finally progressing into the parts of the show I don’t know/remember 
“I won’t let you down.” “I think you will. I think this entire project of yours is stupid and doomed to fail. I think you’re going to be retired, eliminated from existence, and burned on the surface of a billion suns. And I have no doubt that you and your cockamamie experiment will go down in history as colossal failures.” “You know I think that—” “Toodeloo.” My high school guidance counselor to me when I said I wanted to go to school out of province lmao
“I can’t wait to have breakfast with Kant, and lunch with Michel Foucault, and then have dinner with Kant with Kant again so we can talk about what came up at breakfast.” “I’m sorry Chidi, all the great philosophers in history ended up in the Bad Place.” I believe this
I thought for a second Pedro, Angelique and Pevita were ALL Chidi’s potential soulmates and got excited, but straight people strike again lmao:
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I have been wondering for a while whether or not sexuality plays into soulmates though. Does anyone have platonic soulmates in the afterlife lmao
“But good, would I go as far as to say to say you look good? Doubtful.” Chidi trying to be the appropriate amount of nice turns into negging lmao
Rhkjhgjhgg Eleanor immediately recognizing the slightly more whack energy this time around
“Charmed, I’m short.” Fghgkhgkgh the immediate fixation on her soulmate’s height and appearance in a way she didn’t do so meanspiritedly for any of the gang. Tahani said all of my friends are hot and Eleanor’s the only one allowed to be short
Tahani said: If Eleanor’s busy, I’ll step up to the plate to represent the Girlies Who Are Seconds Away From Losing It at All Times:
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“Some of the [soulmate] pairings are platonic, some are romantic.” I guess that answers that question
Honestly didn’t think about it until now but it’s impressive that Jason can wear a Buddhist’s monks’ clothes the exact correct way based only on a single observation. He shows his intelligence in his way!!
“I am a Ferrari, and you don’t keep a Ferrari in the garage.” Vicky aka Real Eleanor knows her worth
The parallel storylines revealing what each character has been doing are very fun
Genuinely impressed by how much prop paper Kristen Bell just ate
“I’m too young to die, and too old to eat off the kids menu! What a stupid age I am.” Me too, Jason:
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I also think having to go to a jazz show would tip me off that I’m in hell
“This is your soulmate, Tahani.” I know you can have a platonic soulmate now but I believe in my heart that this one wasn’t 
“Can you just chill out? Is that possible, Janet? Can you just chill out a little?” “Nope, it’s gonna be the same every time.” Me talking to my mother LMAO
“We are on strike until our demands are met.” #PayYourWriters
It’s impressive how many times Michael has managed to lose most of the only four people his entire neighbourhood is designed for
Chidi not hesitating for a second to tell Eleanor he loves her back:
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“How many times have Chidi and I slept together?” “Eight different days, but like 20 different sessions.” GOOD FOR THEM LMAO
“I want to team up with you guys.” Michael said: Let me in the gang 💗
I am also genuinely endeared by Michael. His definition of torture is honestly so polite. Jazz and froyo LMAO 
“I’m sorry, has it been 100 hours?” Hahahaha I love how Tahani is genuinely intimidated by Eleanor’s confident dismissal 
Ethics question: If Tahani’s lack of care of other people is the reason she ended up in the Bad Place, do they also take into account the emotional abuse by her whole family and the way other people insistently dismissed her for Kamilah as part of that motive? Does enduring that so many times without complaint not tip the scales in her favour at all?
“And since you’re the only actual humans here, I’m on board for whatever fun little schemes you guys come up with.” Janet’s ride-or-die protocol is still engaged at heart
“Make all your memos one page, max, with pictures.” Vicky would’ve fit right in for the [Redacted] presidency
“These Millennials, they have no work ethic. Oh, sorry, a Millennial is someone who’s only been torturing people for a thousand years.”
This really is a good summary of what it’s like to take a philosophy class:
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“Man, repressing your feelings is great.” Michael’s midlife crisis is very human man, down the to convertible and the much younger woman
Gdhkhdkjdh Tahani 🤝 Michael
Having very benign visions of what being tortured is like, as with someone throwing a better party than you
This is the line I quote most from this show out of everything:
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[Gasps] “A family pack?” Me 🤝 Eleanor
Unprocessed spicy memories bubbling up in the middle of a mundane task in a communal space 
“You’re cool, dope, fresh and smart-brained. I’ve never seen you dance, but I bet you’re good. Because... you’re good at everything. You’re awesome. Be nicer to yourself.” Tahani 🤝 Jason 🤝 Jason
Falling in love anyone who is nice to you for more than a few minutes
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“What do you think about writing a rap musical about Kierkegaard?” I want to read the songs that Chidi wrote LOL
“My name is Kierkegaard, and my writing is impeccable. Check out my teleological suspension of the ethical.” THANK YOU CHIDI FOR IMMMEDIATELY DELIVERING
You can tell this was filmed in 2017 because it is PEAK Hamilton era
“Plus they’re all French, so they’re going to the bad place automatically.” HGGHKGHGHKGH. Oh the French
“You’ve never dated anyone like Jason before.” Not Tahani getting love advice from Jason’s ex-wife
Take a shot everytime someone in this show says, “This is why everyone hates moral philosophy professors.”
Michael said: Chidi please adapt to my practical learning style
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“But I tell her she’s pretty a hundred times a day, and she’s never said I’m pretty once.” Illegal. Tahani should be court-ordered to tell Jason he’s pretty
I believe in my whole heart that Janet lost a thumb because even as their couple’s therapist, she is still in love with Jason
“I’m your hottest friend. No, Tahani. I’m your nicest fr— no, Jason. I’m your friend!” LMAO at least Eleanor is self-aware
Fkfkjfhfjfh I guess technically Michael was doing his job by torturing Chidi
Also imagine the psychological trauma Chidi absorbs from having to decide to kill people so many times in the trolley problem. A reboot button would be helpful for him now 
“Aw, I’m happy for you guys.” [retches and vomits out a frog] JANETJASON ENDGAME
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Michael’s little evil laugh also gets me every time. I love Ted Danson
“I call them ‘opposite tortures.’” “Do you mean, ‘presents?’” Hahahaha
Chidi’s a better or more morally stagnant inflexible than I am because I do think making people happy is a good thing even if the gifts are bribes in pursuit of forgiveness 
The way Janet malfunctions every time she supports Jason and Tahani. SHE’S IN LOOOOOVE
“Glitches may be a sign that your Janet is processing or disseminating information that is incompatible with objective truth.” Because she’s lying about her feeeelings
VINDICATIONNNNNNNNNNNN:
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[Chanting] “Kill me, kill me, kill me, kill me.” Janet is perfect and also Jason was right she is Michael’s family LMAO
“The reason is friends!! You’re my friend, Janet, that’s why I can’t kill you.” MICHAEL SAID I AM A DEMON WHO CAN GROW
“This is my new rebound boyfriend Derek. I made him!” OH MY GOD
I guess Tahani and Jason have one thing in common aside from being hot: Their irreverant disregard for everything outside of themselves hahahaha
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The cut between Tahani and Jason having a picnic and deciding to get married vs. Chidi, Eleanor and Michael having an ethical dilemma about whether to break them up the greater good of society (themselves)
“That [teacher-student relationship] used to happen a lot at Lynyrd Skynyrd High School, but this time you won’t be arrested.” 1) Someone please help the people at this high school and 2) We know that these are not the vows Jason is meant to have. Send Nude Pics of Your Heart to Me lives in my heart forever
Fjfkhfhfkj Poor Janet, she’s been through more human emotions in the past couple of weeks than in any iteration of herself before:
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Eleanor ready to take the opportunity to forget she’s in love with Chidi jghkghg
“This isn’t about your wind-chime penis, in fact it’s not about you at all.” Underrated line from Janet LMAO
[Concerned] “Can you get pregnant from reabsorbing?” I would like to believe this is a lingering hint of jealousy from Jason
FKSJHSKJHS THE FACT EVERYONE LISTENS WHEN ELEANOR TELLS THEM NOT TO LOOK
This episode is emotionally a bummer for all involved couples 
“You really did just come here to chat. To shoot the shirt with your ole pal Eleanor.” “I guess so, why?” “It’s just a very human-y thing to do.” Michael and Eleanor are perhaps my favourite friendship
Eleanor said I’ve only had Michael as a friend for two weeks but if anything happened to him I’d stake the eternal souls of everyone in this room and then myself:
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“What the here, dude?” Hahahahaha also a good line
“The other worst moment of Tahani’s life? Every other moment of her empty, pointless life.” This is like that scene in She-ra where they’re like ‘this feels way more personal compared to fire’ 
However, I do appreciate the dropping of hints that Michael is laying out: “Derek” Bortles - last song of a party -  the train/trolley
Janet’s version of magnet intoxication wanting to braid people’s hair is Peak Drunk Not-A-Girl in the Bathroom of a Nightclub Energy
[Sobbing] “You’re my friends and I wanted to save you.” I love one (1) Demon Buddy
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Honestly props to Eleanor for figuring out Michael meant for them to stay because I personally would’ve interpreted the mention of Mindy St. Clair as enough reason to go 
“Here’s a willing sex robot and two duffel bags full of cocaine.” Mindy’s Medium Place is going to tip the scales in favour of the positive for her I guess lmao
“Maybe I should’ve realized this wasn’t the good place because of all the diarrhea.” “Maybe you shouldn’t be eating frozen yogurt right now.” Jason providing our Asian Lactose Intolerance Representation 😌💕
It actually does make sense that Eleanor loves Chidi when Chidi does not return those feelings because aside from the fact she has had that knowledge several weeks longer than Chidi, she is also a person who has consistently trusted her gut, and her gut tells her that she loves him, whereas Chidi needs time to think it out
“Once, you handed him a tissue right before he sneezed nd that simple act of anticipating his needs made him fall for you.” 1) Cute and 2) This isssss a love language
Ghkhgghkghg Michael coming into this with no plan and hoping to discover one along the way. Relatable demon 
The height difference with Tahani and everyone else is really apparent in this shot:
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Chidi and Jason in particular doing the same dance move is so endearing. They all have something in common!! 
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“All every wanted to was to know what it was like to be human. And now we’re going to do the most human thing of all. Attempt something futile with a ton of unearned confidence and fail spectacularly.”
Michael 🤝 Greed from FMA
Being primarily motivated by their love of their homies and general inclination towards more human emotion than any of their counterparts
“As long as I’m with you guys, I’m always in the Fake Good Place.” I want to give Michael a little kiss on the forehead
 “I just made an aphorism.” I just learned a new word
“Any time I had a problem and I threw a molotov cocktail, boom, right away, I had a different problem.” Jason does think outside the box
Tahani’s American accent is actually very good lmao 
“Principles aren’t principles when you pick and choose when you’re going to follow them.” I understand here Chidi means ‘principles’ to mean ‘fundamental truths’ and not ‘moral decisions’ but when it comes to an ethical principle, a person is always going to decide to follow it or not. That is the nature of being autonomous 
Unrelated to anything that’s going on in the Bad Place, the costume change really highlights that Manny Jacinto is so incredibly handsome, look at him, he’s like a painting:
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Fully did not realize that Dax Shepard makes a guest appearance in the Bad Place. However. I believe it 
“Hang out with Johnny Depp enough, you become pretty good at lying.” This feels like a prophecy of some sort
“But then I remembered: I’m a naughty bitch.” The dialogue in this show has really transformed since they started being allowed to swear
“A moral particularist, like me—I’m one now, I just decided—would say there’s no absolute rule. You have to choose your actions based on the particular situation.” Turns out I am also somewhat of a moral particularist, Eleanor 
Honestly shocked and perplexed that it’s taken THIS long for anyone to catch Michael in a lie
Say what you will about Jason, he’s very good at molotov cocktails and knowing his own heart
“Goodbye Eleanor.” MICHAELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. He is the best demon buddy they could ever ask for:
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I don’t know who I envisioned as the All-Knowing Judge of All Realms but I do feel like Maya Rudolph is a strong choice
“In the words of one of my actual friends: Ya basic.” I love Michael absorbing Eleanor’s vocabulary
Tahani’s soft gasp and “Oh no,” at what the spa employees and bikini waxers think of her kjgkhgjhg. Fair and relatable but you’d think it’d be the butlers and waiters, considering it’s a morality test
The gang wanting to all stay together in their failure or success 🥺 I love them
You know, I think Tahani letting go of what her parents think of her IS success, even if it’s not technically the exercise
GO JANETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
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Eleanor choosing not to reveal that she is the only one who has gotten past her fatal flaw (selfishness, as opposed to Chidi, Jason and Tahani failing to get past their indecisiveness, impulsivity and care of how others think of her) is also her being selfless 
“Hey guys! How ya been?” THE GANG’S ALL BACK TOGETHER:
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“If I’m right, the system by which we judge humans, the very method we use to deem them good or bad, is so fundamentally flawed that hundreds of millions of people have been wrongly condemned to an eternity of torture.” THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING, MICHAEL
“Whatever progress I have made, it’s because you and I have become friends.” I love Tahani and Eleanor’s friendship, they’re so sweet
“Jason, I love you.” “Oh, word?” “Word.” JASONJANET ENDGAME 💘
“I think I love you too girl.” YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH JASON!!! HE DOESN’T KNOW MUCH, BUT HE KNOWS HIS HEART
DOUBLE YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, GO CHIDI, HE KNOWS HIS HEART TOO:
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They all love each other so much they don’t want to be in separate Medium Places 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 THEY ARE THE CUTEST FRIEND GROUP
Hahaha, I notice that her roommates call her Elea-NOR instead of Elea-NER like her friends do which feels like something intentional 
“Do you want to come to Lauren’s baby shower?” “Do you want to chew on my ASS-ortment of brownies that I will be bringing to Lauren’s baby shower?” [Eleanor Shellstrop voice] Pobody’s nerfect
“That took a lot of courage for you to admit that, and I admire your honesty. You stupid skank! How could you do that to me? I hate you!” Newly Not Dead Eleanor is about to learn about moral particularism 
“I still think he’s kind of hot.” “I guess, in like a sick Victorian boy kind of way.” “Oooh, yeah yeah yeah, I want to like, feed him soup.” Brittany is fun. Also I know they said Benedict Cumberbatch but this is exactly how people talk about Timothy Chalamet
Michael loves his friends so much he cannot help but nudge them along through Moral Interventions at the Sports Bar:
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“I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people, and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put: We are not in this alone.” I LOVE this brand of moral philosophy
Also this last nudge to bringing them back together is a really great way to end this season. This show is SO GOOD 
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pandasmagorica · 1 year ago
Text
Ongoing watch: Be My Favorite Episode 11
I thought the seven years of their relationship montage was absolutely delightful. Too bad the episode 11 curse hit with such a vengeance.
Spoilers follow.
Early in the episode, we get a visit from the Crystal Ball uncle chewing out Kawi for wasting his time travel on get rich quick schemes (the lottery) and informing him that, with his 20,000 baht ($645 US?) lottery win, he's used up all the luck in his life.
We did in fact see earlier in the series where Kawi tried unsuccessfully to find the winning lottery numbers, so the new scene is not totally out of the blue. (Does anyone have a post on how the lottery works in Thailand? In the US, you can bet on whatever numbers you want. You might have to split the prize if other people put in the same number. If that's how it worked in Thailand, you could have it that on that day in that particular timeline, everyone in Thailand bet on the same number and it didn't even pay back the price of the ticket. But apparently, that's not how it works in Thailand, as we saw in the earlier episode where Kawi was trying to find those numbers.)
Okay, that's ambiguous. Any kind of luck? Lottery luck? Because he does land a long term boyfriend, which might be Kawi's work on himself but it's also luck.
But it also might mean that when he gets the flu it progresses to life threatening pneumonia.
To be clear, we know it doesn't look good for him medically, or with regard to rights for Pisaeng (see @bengiyo post on ep. 11) to make any medical decisions for him (have they even talked about what Kawi would want?)
Is it in Kawi's destiny to die at 27? We know he made it to 30 in the original timeline. So probably not his destiny. But people can lose their lives without it being their destiny.
But what if he doesn't die? What if, because there's no official relative to make the decision, he lies there in a coma for years? Even with the doctor relenting and letting Pisaeng, Max, and Pear visit Kawi, there's no way they are going to let Pisaeng make a decision about that.
So, rather than live in this limbo where Pisaeng blames himself for Kawi's state (whether or not he is right), Pisaeng tries the crystal ball music box and finds himself back in the past just before the Bangkok World trip and starting a new timeline.
We know it's a new timeline, because the first time Pisaeng turns the music box (episode 10? I'm not going back to check it now) he gives a hmm look and sets it down. This time though, he gives a panicked look before setting it down. So definitely a new timeline.
And this totally blows my theory that Pisaeng's episode 10 (?) turn resulted in a trip to Pisaeng's 15 year old past. Because if his reaction to his first time travel is panic, then he didn't time travel that first time he turned the globe. All he did was unintentionally set up a hook (in the computer programming sense) for the actual time travel in episode 11 to land.
So, then the question becomes, why didn't he time travel in episode 10 or whichever? He certainly had reason to. Remember, in an earlier episode, he told his mother that she couldn't bully him into the closet at 20 like she could at 15. And we got that coda where he approaches Kawi in high school, so his interest goes back to then.
Was him coming out at 20 enough? Maybe it was. Maybe it was enough that he was with Kawi now and didn't have to try for it to happen in high school. (Although then why did we get the high school scene? Was the line about 15 and 20 to his mom just a throwaway line?) Maybe it was that he was with Kawi now and didn't want to take a chance on messing it up.
But he clearly now believes he put Kawi in this mess. So he has a reason to go back.
A big part of fantasies is figuring out the rules of the fantasy. We (or I) thought it was sufficient to turn the music box to time travel. But maybe you need to turn the music box when you have a reason (good or bad - lottery) to time travel.
As for the theory that Kawi is going to die no matter what (regardless that he didn't die before 30 in earlier timelines), that would give Pisaeng even more reason to keep travelling to the past, so he could have more and more time with Kawi.
One thing we don't know is whether time travel back erases your age or whether it's cumulative, so Kawi isn't really 27 when he gets pneumonia, he's 37? 47? 57? 67? 77? He's done a lot of time travel.
I may have more to say about this after I've read @telomeke's post about how time travel works in Be My Favorite.
Anyway, now I'm going to follow the various links in @twig-tea's Be My Favorite meta post.
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babsvibes · 2 years ago
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What are your five favorite Logan moments? 😚
Come on man. Do you know how hard this was for me?? I had to narrow it down to favorite character defining moments that aren’t just favorite Logan lines, aren’t favorite Louise-focused interactions, and aren’t favorite babygirl!Logan moments. You’d think with that criteria I’d be down to only five, but you’d be wrong.
Five favorite Logan moments + a couple bonuses
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As for why these make the list (or at least one of several lists):
Tumblr keeps duplicating my points ahhh
I got a little wordy sorry sorry
It’s not that common for a character’s motivations to be so clearly spelled out, but you can see everything Logan cares about right here. Logan wants to create a relaxed environment, wants his friends to be comfortable, and doesn’t want people impeding on that space. It also showcases that he’s an oddball. Like the language he uses is so specific and detaches himself as the leader and one responsible for the space around him. It’s also emotionally aware (like we’ll see again later). Every single one of Logan’s actions can be explained by these couple of lines, so they’re incredibly important.
It’s not that common for a character’s motivations to be so clearly spelled out, but you can see everything Logan cares about right here. Logan wants to create a relaxed environment, wants his friends to be comfortable, and doesn’t want people impeding on that space. It also showcases that he’s an oddball. Like the language he uses is so specific and detaches himself as the leader and one responsible for the space around him. It’s also emotionally aware (like we’ll see again later). Every single one of Logan’s actions can be explained by these couple of lines, so they’re incredibly important.
The entire montage of Louise following Logan around and him just letting her is so gold, and it kicks off with this character defining moment. He’s not going to give up, and he’s going to make up some bullshit about his psat scores to solidify that. He just likes the ears. He doesn’t mess them up or let his friends hold them, and he doesn’t go out of his way to bother Louise more when he’s “winning.” He’s just a competitive, stupid teenager.
Look… he so obviously thinks of himself as a ladies man while he’s posturing in this tiny, tiny moment where he’s talking to Shanaya, and I think that’s hilarious.
He’s annoying and gross while he works in the restaurant, that’s a given. But the moments he has with Gene, Tina, and even Linda for a split second all show that he’s really not there to cause problems to people who aren’t causing him problems. Gene’s excited to hang out with another boy, and Logan indulges him with high fives. Tina asks Logan a bunch of embarrassing questions, and he just tells her it’s top secret guy stuff. It’s cute in a “oh, you little shit” way.
Okay I caved and included two Louise and Logan interactions, but come ooonnnnn. He’s such a little wimp that Louise, the girl he keeps getting in fights with, is now the safest option for him to hide behind despite her being, by his own admission, “the worst and smallest choice” for a human shield. He’s so DUMB. Next, he doesn’t take her down with him. When it’s clear he’s about to be pummeled, he pushes Louise away. Lastly and most importantly, we learn he calls his dick and balls his unmentionables. All equally important things.
Again, this is an example of him being very aware of what’s going on internally. AND we find out he’s seeing a doctor. I mean, not a very good one, but he’s going. I like the little bit of him having to reassure everyone listening that he’s “totally normal” because… he’s not. He’s got some issues. Yes, I think babygirl!Logan moments are hilarious, but this bit where he is an actual antagonist and has these depths given to him give me a lot to work with in fic. Usually the depth is mommy issues, but you know. Depth lol.
In one gif, we see that Logan 1) can analyze themes of love and acceptance in cheesy movies 2) is incapable of shutting up 3) flinches and is easily taken down by Louise even WITH a warning.
In conclusion, I love him your honor.
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storiesforallfandoms · 3 years ago
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and the winner is... ~ eminem
word count: 1784
request?: yes!
“hey, love your writing sm ❤️ I really like the concept where the reader is a young actress with Eminem, so can I request one where they go to Marshall’s award show for the first time publicly, they try to keep it low key but the reader presents an award and when Em wins they share a warm moment on stage and the media loses it? thanks in advance”
description: in which they say they’re going to be lowkey for their first public appearance as a couple, and then he wins the award she’s presenting
pairing: eminem x female!reader
warnings: swearing
masterlist (one, two)
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It was hard to keep my hands off of Marshall as we walked down the red carpet. It was our first public outing as a couple, but Marshall wasn’t very into PDA so we had decided to keep it somewhat lowkey. It seemed like a good idea in theory, until Marshall did the unthinkable and showed up dressed in a suit. How am I supposed to not jump his bones when he looks damn fine in a suit?
Every time I so much as glanced at him the paparazzi would go crazy. So many flashing lights that eventually I was seeing spots. It was hard to keep smiling when I couldn’t even see ahead of me.
Marshall put an arm around my waist - which of course led to more flashing lights - and walked me off the red carpet into the venue. The minute I walked through the doors into the dimly lit room, it really was like I couldn’t see. I had to take a minute to let my eyes adjust to the sudden light change.
“Weird how quickly I go from basically a nobody on a red carpet to a hot commodity just because I have attractive arm candy,” I joked.
A half smile tugged at Marshall’s lips. “You were never a nobody. Not to me anyways.”
“Awe, that’s so sweet it’s kind of gross,” I teased.
This earned me an actual laugh as Marshall pulled me in for a kiss. Without any prying eyes around, we felt free to actually be a couple.
We engaged with some others in the industry, including those Marshall considered to be close friends of his. I felt out of place at this music award show as an actress who was still trying to become more than just a side character in the movies she starred in. I was grateful to have Marshall there to help me through it.
When we took our seats as the show was starting, Marshall reached over to take my hand. “Are you okay?”
I shrugged. “Nervous I think. Which I shouldn’t be because it’s just me announcing an award, but it’s my first time on an award show stage for any reason, and it’s a pretty big award.”
“And it’s one I’m nominated for.”
I looked over at Marshall with wide eyes. “What?!”
“You didn’t know?”
I shook my head. Now I felt so much more nervous. What if I pulled a Steve Harvey and said the wrong name because I wanted Marshall to win? Or what if he actually did win but everyone thought I said he did because we were dating? I tried to focus on the stage ahead of me but my heart was beating so fast that my vision was starting to get blurry. I felt warm, like I was sweating, which made me worry that my makeup was starting to run. I was going to look disgusting with my makeup running on live television.
Sensing my new found nervousness, Marshall gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.
“Hey, look at me.” I glanced over to meet his gaze. “It’s going to be okay. You’ve rehearsed this speech so much that you can say it without the teleprompter. It’s not going to be any different just because I’m nominated. If I win, you give me the award and I do a speech. If I don’t win, you give the award to whoever does and they make a speech. It’s not a big deal, (Y/N), don’t worry too much about it.”
I wished I could’ve just let my fear rush from my body, but it was still there. Before I could say anything else, the lights went down and the show officially started.
I tried to just sit and enjoy the show but it was hard when I had my upcoming presenter role looming over me. Of course, it was one of the last awards of the show, so I had to sit there and let my nerves build as the suspense for the winner of the award grew as well.
Every now and then Marshall would give my hand another squeeze and I would calm down for that split second. Having him by my side helped a lot, but every time I remembered that he might be the recipient of the award I became nervous again.
Finally, it was my time to take the stage. They passed me the envelope with the name of the winner and motioned for me to take the stage. I plastered a smile on my face as my name was called and I walked onto the stage. I hoped the cameras couldn’t pick up my shaking, and I really hoped my shaking wouldn’t make my voice sound as bad as I feared it would.
“This award can only go to the best of the best,” I started, glancing at the prompter in front of me to make sure I was saying the words correctly. “The person who worked the hardest and had the best payoff with their release. The competition this year is fierce, and it was hard to narrow it down to just these five artists, as there have been so many amazing works of art released this past year. It has been an even harder choice to pick who of them all is the best, although I might be bias in saying I’ve already chosen my favorite.”
The audience chuckled at my improved addition to the speech.
“Ladies and gentlemen, here are your nominees.”
I watched the video that played of the nominated artists. My heart skipped a beat when Marshall came up, a few clips from the music videos he had filmed playing in a short montage. He had worked so hard on his latest album, every part of me hoped that he would be the winner I was announcing.
As the video came to an end, I turned back to face the audience (and the cameras) to announce the winner.
“And the award goes to...”
I tried not to let my slight fear show as I fumbled with the envelope for a moment. I started to worry that I wouldn’t even be able to open it and completely embarrass myself on live TV. I tried not to sigh with relief when the seal perfectly popped open and I was able to pull the card out. The smile on my face had to have given away the winner before the words were even out of my mouth.
“Eminem!”
The crowd cheered and stood from their seats. A camera found Marshall, who was standing from his seat and hugging Paul and Denaun before making his way to the stage. I couldn’t help but smile proudly at him as I extended the award I was holding - his award - to him.
I was taken by surprise when he wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me in for a kiss. It was brief since he had an award to accept, but it was enough to make my head spin, the way his kisses usually did.
When he pulled away I was still so stunned that I almost forgot to give him his award. I could see him trying to hold back a laugh as he took it from my hands and turned to the microphone.
“Thank you,” he said to the still cheering audience. For a minute I forgot there was anyone else in the room, and realizing so many people had watched that kiss made my cheeks heat up. “I’d like to thank my manager, Paul, who for some reason still backs me with everything I do and produce even when it pushes the boundaries a little too much. I also want to thank the good Doctor, who has been supporting me since day one and who has always believed in me and gave me this platform to make music and to push the boundaries that Paul has to deal with. My daughters, my biggest inspirations. And of course, I’d like to thank the beautiful lady who presented this award to me tonight. I may not show it publicly but I am my happiest when I’m with you and I cannot thank you enough for that.”
I blinked away the tears forming in my eyes as I clapped along with the audience. The music started playing as Marshall offered me his arm to walk me off the stage. I felt like I was floating on cloud nine as we walked down the stairs and backstage, away from the cameras and the thousands of people watching us, both in person and on TV.
We were greeted backstage by other presenters and winners who were still mingling and celebrating their wins. Marshall was congratulated and a few of the other presenters told me how well I did with my presentation. I was proud of myself for getting through it, but I was more proud that I didn’t go completely airheaded after Marshall kissed me.
When we finally got away from the large amount of people, Marshall pulled me in for another kiss.
“So much for keeping it lowkey, huh?” I teased when I pulled away.
“I was caught up in the moment,” he said with a shrug, but I wasn’t completely convinced.
“That speech was uncharacteristically sweet,” I said. “For your public persona anyways. I figured you’d keep it short and sweet and maybe get the show into a little bit of trouble with an unplanned curse word.”
He chuckled. “Well normally that would be how things go. But I meant what I said during my speech: you make me the happiest I’ve ever been. When you said my name I just couldn’t help but feel this unfamiliar surge of happiness and excitement at winning. You know I don’t care about these types of award shows, but the fact that you presented this award to me made me care for just a second. I know I’ll be the talking point for the next few days because of this, but right now I don’t care all that much.”
Tears were welling in my eyes again as I pulled him back to me. “Shut up, you’re gonna ruin my makeup.”
His laugh filled my ears as he pulled me for another kiss. The happiness he said he felt coursed through my veins too. I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else in a moment like this.
When he pulled away he put his arm around me again and started to walk towards the door. “Let’s get out of here. I think I wanna celebrate my win with the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met.”
I smiled brightly at him. “I like the sound of that.”
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queen-beefcake-sqx · 2 years ago
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Out of every MXTX ship, beefleaf deserves a mermaid AU the most
Okay, okay. Hang on. Beefleaf does deserve more mermaid AUs, but I raise you one better - selkie AU. My brain is rotating this so hard. Consider this, anon:
Shi Wudu is heir to a massive fleet of commercial fishing vessels, and the largest supplier of seafood in the region. Shi Qingxuan is his adorable little sister who is wildly uninterested in the business side of things and just wants to wander the beach and collect seashells.
Except Shi Qingxuan is deathly afraid of water; as a child she fell overboard and almost drowned. Of course she was miraculously rescued and left ashore but has absolutely zero memory of her savoir. Shi Wudu always says he saved her from the water…
One day she finds an injured person on the shore. They’re incredibly beautiful, pale and inky black long hair, and horrifyingly naked, allowing SQX to see injuries that look like harpoon gouges. She’s no doctor, but sewing up a wound can’t be that much different than sewing up a ripped sail, right? Right! :D
He Xuan is Not Pleased at being woken up in this state. They’re defensive, silent, refuses to answer any of SQX’s questions or let her near their wounds. They speak without showing their teeth, eyes out toward the ocean. It’s only with extreme convincing that they allow her to sew them up and bring them a sailor uniform from the docks. They part ways as He Xuan insists on staying at the shore, searching for their “lost things”.
(Later, SQX hears one of the sailors got into a fight aboard one of the commercial vessels when a strange person climbed aboard the ship and attacked them. Like a monster from the depths, surrounded by billowing black hair like seaweed. Surely a coincidence, right?)
And because it’s beefleaf they just… keep running into each other along the shore, and eventually by the docks. Shi Qingxuan pries information from He Xuan a parcel at a time — his family is all gone, his home somewhere he cannot return to, rendered unlivable. Shi Qingxuan tells him about her life inland, her brother and his business, her love and fear of the ocean.
Of course there has to be a whole montage of He Xuan teaching her to swim. That’s a given.
And He Xuan seems genuinely soft at how much she enjoys the water, the freedom she feels in the waves as the breeze rocks her back toward shore. And he knows, quietly, that he’s in trouble.
Shi Qingxuan slowly shows He Xuan their little fishing village, introducing him to her friend Xie Lian, who weirdly tells her to be careful with strange people… but He Xuan is her friend, too! There’s no reason to mistrust him, hahahaha! Silly Xie Lian!
(If Hua Cheng makes knowing eyes at He Xuan over Xie Lian’s shoulder, SQX doesn’t notice it. Hua Cheng also lost all his family and wandered alone for a while, maybe they could be friends?)
(Author’s Note: Hua Cheng totally knows, because he’s a selkie too.) (The HuaLian selkie AU also writes itself and I’ll totally write a follow up post for that)
Shi Wudu is Not Happy with SQX’s new friend, and warns her to stay away from them. SQX pointedly ignores this and continues sneaking out to the beach while Shi Wudu is out at sea.
Eventually she mentions the incident from her childhood, and He Xuan is… strangely cold to her after this. Shaken, if she didn’t know them better. They ask if she ever wondered how her brother saved her from the waves. She doesn’t know, never bothered to ask.
And of course Shi Wudu is totally dismissive when she asks. Because it isn’t like he’ll admit what he did…
It isn’t like he’ll admit he saw her pulled ashore by a large seal, who hovered over her with jaws like it might bite down…
It isn’t like he’ll admit to firing the harpoon gun he always carried with him, spearing the creature he saw as a threat to his little sister...
It isn’t like he’ll admit to watching as the skin fell away — revealing a woman, struck dead by his impulsive actions — and collected it even as he bundled the woman in his boat and sunk her body to be reclaimed by the sea and those within it…
It isn’t like he’ll admit the skin hanging on the wall of his room in their home is the same one from that night, and the skin he found by his commercial vessel after the fisherman attack sits bundled in a chest at the foot of his bed.
The same skin He Xuan desperately wants back. Because they know Shi Wudu took it. They saw him fish it from the waters as his men fired harpoons on them. And now that Shi Qingxuan has told him so much about their business, he understands that the only boats out on the water were ever under Shi Wudu’s control. He dropped He xuan’s fiance back into the sea to be found by her lover. He overskimmed the nearby seas, resulting in less and less food every year for the selkies and mermaids, leading to He Xuan’s family’s starvation. 
But Shi Qingxuan knows none of this. No one will tell her. No one will rescue her from her ignorance. Instead He Xuan convinces her to take him to her house, because he knows the skin must be there. And of course Shi Wudu comes home as he’s in the middle of removing his dead fiance’s skin from the wall.
All havoc breaks loose. Shi Wudu is furious - he warned her, warned her to be careful of the stranger from the beach. He Xuan bares their sharp teeth for the first time before SQX, revealing themself to be a selkie. And with Shi Wudu’s harpoon gun in hand, he offers the choice - Shi Wudu can die or lose his sister to the sea, turned into a monster like them. A life for a life either way. 
Of course Shi Wudu dies. Losing SQX to the sea was never a choice. Everything leading to this moment was to keep her away from the water, away from the dangers lurking there. He Xuan leaves SQX there in the home, mourning her brother’s body, taking the skins with them.
… And it is a very, very long time before Shi Qingxuan visits the water again. Months, a year. But slowly she begins walking out to the waters again, sitting on shore where she met a beautiful person with a beautiful heart that was twisted by cruelty and trauma. She knows that now. 
And she visits every evening, religiously, sitting on the sand where the water barely kisses her toes and waits until the nights turn too cold to continue sitting.
And one early spring evening she falls asleep by the water, and wakes up to find an old tattered cloak draped around her shoulders, the same one she used to wear to visit He Xuan, the same one she left with them the last time before…. Everything…. And she catches sight of a seal diving beneath the water.
Of course she runs in. Of course she forces her limbs to remember everything He Xuan taught her, braving the icy waters to try to reach him. The waves pull her under, knock her about. Isn’t it ironic her brother’s sacrifice would be in vain? She really would let the ocean claim her…
Except again for a second time in her life she’s saved by a seal dragging her ashore, teeth latched onto her clothes and pulling until she’s breached the surface and gulping air. She clings to them, unwilling to let go. Refusing to let go, even as they try to squirm to the sea again.
And she tells them everything she’s felt for months, all the fear and the sadness but even more than that, the loneliness and ache for her friend. And she doesn’t beg them not to leave, but instead… take her with them. Let her come be with them. 
He Xuan doesn’t, that night. It’s many more reluctant visits, quietly rebuilding what was lost between them, before He Xuan sheds their skin again and wraps them both in it, walking them into the water. 
and I'm stopping it there because this got wildly out of hand. Anyway that’s it that’s my selkie AU. [bows]
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rosetheshapeshifter · 4 years ago
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I have decided to ignore canon in every fandom.
And so, this is what’s canon in Fairy Tail (according to me.)
*Disclaimer: No, these are not true. As much as I wish they were, Mashima is a coward who refused to let these things happen)
-Acnologia is very much alive, when the final battle happened, all Natsu did was take his magic out of him and destroy it. Thus rendering him to being a magic less human. And so, he travels around now as a cranky ass doctor who’s got a stick up his ass permanently.
-Irene lives in a secluded home in the middle of the woods. She has a nice ass garden and prefers to be left alone to her own devices. Erza has visited, but the interactions are awkward.
-Ivan Dreyar, dead. Killed without hesitation. He comes back after the GMG in an attempt to start stealing magic off of Fairy Tail members. He fails, and ends up being killed
-Mest Gryder? Also dead. Again, killed without hesitation by August for being a dumbass. (This is a Mest hate account. I will not accept anything that isn’t slander on this man here)
-Brandish is a part of Fairy Tail, except that she doesn’t like hanging out in the Guild Hall
-Cana lives in Fairy Hills (its a miracle she hasn’t been evicted)
-the dragon slayers have hoards
-They can also turn into fully fledged dragons
-They have some form of Twitter (the guilds are all verified, and Blue Pegasus likes to talk shit)
-Warren becomes their world’s Bill Gates because he invented the cell phone. This causes Makarov to extort him for money all the time
-Gajeel’s hair is either silky smooth or a whole rat’s nest full of tangles, no inbetween
-You know the little montage of scrapbook scenes in the 10th ending? This is a project done at the guild one day after the war (Please let me elaborate on this at some point)
-Makarov, Macao, Wakaba, and Gildarts (when he was in town) all helped raise the children that joined Fairy Tail at a young age. They clearly failed, and thus turned them into society’s problem.
-Porlyusica, helped occasionally. She wasn’t too present, cuz she doesn’t like anyone ofc.
-Serena’s stupid ponytails are gone. (No, I will not accept any criticisim)
-I’m not entirely sure if this is canon or not. Part of me thinks I saw it in a fic once, the other thinks it is. But the location of Gray’s house is unknown.
-There is a Fairy Hills like building for the dudes, this is where Gajeel lives and how he managed to get close to Jet and Droy who also live here. 
-Freed and Bickslow live here too. 
-Laxus does not, because he refuses to share an apartment building with his guildmates. Also, his biggest fear is Natsu ever stepping foot in there. Therefore, his apartment is on the other side of town, away from the Guild. Freed, Evergreen, Bickslow, and Makarov are the only ones who know of its location.
-I think the idea of Wall Eehto staying alive is really funny. Mainly because, he’s an off brand Gajeel. But also, consider him having to work as a customer service employee for Warren later on. He works for the equivalent of Apple and is dealing with customer service. -SPEAKING OF CUSTOMER SERVICE. The Magic Council’s complaint department is 98% complaints about Fairy Tail. The poor workers are constantly dealing with problems people have with that guild. (which is completely understandable tbh)
-Meaning, the Magic Council definitely has an entire department just to handle Fairy Tail and their misdemeanors.
-The only reason the guild hasn’t been forcibly shut down is because it hold’s Fiore’s strongest mages who are all about family and sticking together. They beat Zeref and the Spriggan 12 along with Acnologia. Would you really want to be the person to have to tell them that they legally cannot all be under the same roof at any time? Didn’t think so.
-Silver Fullbuster is alive
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untaemedqueen · 4 years ago
Text
Third Wheeling
CEO!Yoongi x Reader
Genre: Strangers to Lovers!AU, Angst, Fluff, Smut
Chapter 6.
Warnings (Updating Still): Smut, Cheating, Unexpected Pregnancy, Unfaithful, Emotional Damage, Asshole!Yoongi
A/N: As always, my loves @ppersonna, @ladyartemesia, @xjoonchildx consistently support me and make me feel better about how I’m writing. I’m so fucking grateful to them! I really wouldn’t be here without them and of course without all of you <3
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Hospitals have always frightened you. They always smelled a little too much like cleaning supplies and for some odd reason they always had an underlying scent of sickness. Not that you could equate the smell of sickness to anything in particular-- but it just had that scent.
You can remember when your mother got her appendectomy and your dad told you to bring her doshirak while he went off to work, it scared the ever living hell out of you.
It's not that you were a hypochondriac or at least you didn't think you were. But now, as you stand beneath the large entrance to the VIP admittance area, your skin begins to crawl.
Maybe it’s the fear of entering the hospital and getting sick from others or maybe it’s the fact that you’ll be in a small space with the father of your child quite like that fateful night.
You hear a car quickly approaching behind you as you stare up at the gold trimmed sign of the entrance and you can practically feel him. You choose not to turn around, memories of your shopping trip still stuck in your mind like superglue.
Shopping with Yoongi was like a very failed, fucked up montage. You would try something on, come out of the dressing room and he would grimace and wave his hand while sipping champagne telling you to go put on something else.
Namjoon told you that he is a good person, and his life has been hard so being a dick is how he compensates. You want to believe him, but it’s just so hard.
“Little dove. Good morning,” you hear from behind you.
Angling your head to the voice, you take in his appearance. His black hair was combed back, a few odd hairs landing on his forehead. His eyes were fierce and piercing as always. And, his voice is as smooth as silk. For the first time, you notice two piercings on his left ear as he approaches. One is a small hoop made of diamonds and the other just a diamond stud. They look good on him, really fucking good.
“Hi.” you say, lifting your arm awkwardly to wave.
“You ready to see the Kisung heir?” he asks as he looks down at his Rolex.
Just the thought has a lump forming in your throat. Are you ready? This is all so fast and so fucked up.
“I think so,” you reply, earning half of a smirk from him.
“Let’s go up. We have other things to do today.” he tells you as he walks off to the entrance without you.
He makes you feel like such an intrusion. You really are a pauper in his lifestyle.
He holds the door open for you and you’re immediately hit with the smell that can only be akin to a hospital. It makes your stomach churn and suddenly you feel flush. Your skin prickles with heat, a thin layer of nervous sweat beginning to build up on your body.
Stopping at the entrance, you watch as nurses and doctors pass by without a second glance. The simple sight of scrubs and surgical caps is enough to have you leaning against the large potted plant that sits adjacent to the door.
Yoongi begins talking and the sound starts to drown out as you focus on the marble floor.
“Hey. Y/N.” you hear him call impatiently.
“Water,” you whisper softly as your vision begins to tunnel.
“Y/N?” he asks again, softer this time.
“I-I need water.” 
Your mouth is going dry and it’s starting to become hard to swallow.
Your shaky hand reaches out for the lip of the planter beside you to hold you steady.
“Oh fuck!” Yoongi yelps out, he catches your arm as you begin to fall.
“Can I get some water over here?!” he calls to the receptionist and they’re quick to do his bidding.
“I-I’m sorry,” you feel your eyelids getting heavy as you speak.
“Just relax. Calm down. What is it? Is it the kid?” he asks softly in your ear as he hauls you up. Tugging your arm just enough, he’s able to slide his body behind yours. You can feel the hard plains of his abs through his crisp shirt as he molds your body to his.
A receptionist rushes over with the bottle of water and he cracks it open quickly before handing it to you.
“Let’s sit down for a second. Come on,” he whispers in your ear.
Your feet feel as heavy as bricks while he pulls you over to the seating area. Tying your hair up in a ponytail, you lean back into the plush couch with a sigh.
“Drink the water.” he commands, his voice is gruff but the tone is riddled with nervousness.
You sip the water slowly, the spots in your eyes beginning to diminish as he puts his hand on your knee.
“Look at me, just focus on my face,” he calls, tapping his index finger beneath your chin.
Slowly turning your head to him, you can see his eyebrows furrowing with nerves. He cards his fingers through his hair as his thumb rubs gentle strokes on your knee.
“Is it...morning sickness?” he sounds uncomfortable even saying it. You feel uncomfortable hearing it.
You shake your head to him and that seems to make him relax just a bit.
“I have an irrational fear of hospitals,” you reply as your heartbeat begins to slow down. He tilts his head curiously and he wonders to himself what you’ve been through to get a panic attack quite like this.
Was it something that’s happened to you in the past? You seem to be scared of almost anything.
Usually, Yoongi would be annoyed at the mention of anything irrational. But, he fights it for once. For once, maybe he should be honest too.
“I’m afraid of hospitals too,” he admits to you.
“Really?” you ask as you press your hand to your stomach, the feeling of nausea slowly settling away.
His eyes flicker to your hand and he swallows uncomfortably. He turns his head to the large painting on the wall, he traces the abstract lines and shapes on the canvas before nodding.
“Yeah. It always smells weird and the thought of getting even more sick makes me nervous,” he says.
“Me too.” you murmur hopelessly as you look down at his hand on your knee.
“But, this hospital is really good. My family owns it. It’s one of three that we own in Seoul. You’re safe here. I promise,” he swears as he turns his attention back to you.
It’s almost comforting to hear his words. Right now, in this moment, it’s almost difficult to remember how much of an asshole he is.
“When you’re ready, we’ll go up,” he says softly.
His eyes drift over others in the lobby. They’re all staring. His hand rubs uncomfortably at the back of his neck and you follow his gaze.
He shouldn’t be down here with you like this. He’s married. It hits you all in one second.
“Let’s go.” you tell him as you stand up on shaky legs.
“No, Y/N. Wait. Sit down and relax. It’s okay.” he calls to you, but you’re already off to the elevators.
He watches as you slam the button for the elevator, his hands slide over the knees of his pants before he’s standing up to follow you.
Maybe you weren’t a leech. Maybe you were just kind.
You hold the door open for him and he brushes past people without an apology before stepping into the elevator.
“You have a fear of elevators too?” he quips but his joke is brisk and it makes you scowl.
“No.” you murmur as he pushes the fifth floor button.
The silence is uncomfortable as the doors slide shut, the saxophone elevator music would be comical if your crippling embarrassment wasn’t beginning to swallow you whole. Now that your senses were returning to you, you just seized up as soon as you stepped inside the hospital.
You almost fell on the fucking floor like a flopping fish! How embarrassing!
Yoongi can practically sense your nervousness. He can see it in the way your knees knock together, and certainly how your hand grips the railing of the elevator. Your knuckles are practically white as you stare at the floor.
He should find a way to make you feel better, he thinks anyway.
“I like your dress. Looks not so homeless,” he says and he closes his eyes at how he sounds.
Maybe Maya is right, he needs to think before he speaks.
“Oh. Nice. Thanks.” you mutter as you pull at the fabric of the dress.
So much for trying.
“No. I mean-”
“I wear deliciously brown burlap sacks. I got it.” you retort as the doors open. He sighs to himself slightly as he watches you leave him alone in the elevator.
You walk off without him and he’s only a few steps behind but he feels as if he’s losing his ground.
Not only did he almost beat up Park Jimin at the mention of you, but now he’s starting to feel sorry for the things he says? Just what the hell is going on?
But, he can see a different personality almost peeking out of you every time he confronts you. It’s almost nice to see you being different then just nervous and scared.
“Oh! Mr. Min! Right on time, you can follow me!” a nurse calls to him from the reception desk.
“This is the VIP wing, only my family is taken care of up here,” he announces to you. You feel his hand press gently to your lower back and you pull away uncomfortably as you follow the nurse.
His hand feels too comfortable on your back for your liking.
The VIP room is gigantic, so far beyond what you originally had thought just a little while ago when you were downstairs.
The table with stirrups looks intimidating and uncomfortable.
“Just take off your underwear and the doctor will be right in,” the nurse says, her hand slides over Yoongi’s shoulder and you find yourself grimacing at how comfortable he is with it.
It’s like he doesn’t even register that to normal people, that would be uncomfortable.
“Thanks Mira.” he says as he folds his arms.
You watch the door shut and you shake your head in disbelief as he casually sits down in the chair beside the examination table.
“You fuck her too?” you ask him as he pulls out his phone.
“Just once. She wasn't into what I'm into,” he replies calmly and you roll your eyes.
Looking around for somewhere shielded to take off your underwear, his eyebrow quips up.
“I have seen all of you before, y’know. You can just take off your panties and give them to me,” he gives you a big smile as he holds his hand out and you scowl at the notion.
“Asshole.” you whisper, earning a chuckle from him as you walk into the bathroom.
Taking off your underwear, you stare at yourself in the mirror. This was just an out of body experience at this point. You were so far beyond the point of anything making sense. Your life has quite literally changed in a matter of weeks and today you’d be moving into a completely different home. You’d be seeing your child that was a surprise. Everything was moving so fast and it’s so terrifying.
You put your underwear in your purse, one that Yoongi has actually bought you instead of having to borrow Leenas.
Yoongi hasn’t moved an inch as he looks up from his phone, “Your room is ready. The kid’s too. Looks good.” He says as you walk over to the table.
You can only wonder what it looks like, did he buy cheaper things because he feels like that’s all you deserve? Or did he buy expensive furniture to really sell just how much money he actually has?
“I didn’t buy the kid furniture though. Thought you might want to do that. Maya said women go through something called nesting? Sounds like a bird,” he says as he looks back down at his phone.
He sounds really fond of Maya. You wonder what she must be like for him, the king of assholes, to be fond of her.
“Sounds fun!” you reply earnestly as you hop up on the table.
“Fun?”
You hum in agreement as you pull the dress down lower to your knees. “I think picking out furniture and stuff is fun. Leena let me pick out all of the furniture for the penthouse apartment. I like doing that stuff.”
He nods, his lips puffing out like he’s almost impressed before the door opens.
The white lab coat the doctor wears is almost enough to send you into a spiral once more but before your breathing can even hitch you hear the father of your child. “Drink your water. Now.” he calls to you.
He doesn't know where it came from but all he knew was that the water helped before and you should feel better with it. He seemed to get protective of you in that mere second.
“Min Yoongi. A pleasure,” the doctor says as they shake hands.
You practically chug the water, the cooling liquid seems to bring you a sense of peace as he approaches you.
“Y/N, I’m assuming. It’s so nice to meet you,” you shake his hand and out of the corner of your eye you watch Yoongi stand tall before taking his place beside you.
“Hold my hand,” he instructs briskly and you grimace at the thought. He rolls his eyes as he grasps your wrist before placing your hand in his.
You notice just how sweaty his hand is… or is it your hand that’s sweating? There’s moisture, for sure.
“Are you ready to see the Kisung heir? This must be exciting!” the doctor says as he sits down on the rolling stool before you.
Swallowing thickly, you give a small nod. Now, the nerves are really getting to you. Yoongi squeezes your hand tighter before looking down at his phone like this isn’t important to him. Or as if he was trying to avoid it.
“Okay, how are you feeling, Y/N? Any nausea? Tiredness?” the doctor asks as he puts on gloves.
“I’ve been really tired lately. Not so much nausea,” the doctor nods as he sets up the ultrasound equipment.
“Any breast tenderness? Are you in pain?” the question peaks Yoongi’s curiosity and he looks up from his phone to look at you as you nod.
“Yeah, they’re really painful,” you reply softly, almost embarrassed at the questions.
He had no idea. You hadn’t said anything about pain.
“That’s normal. Abdominal pain too? Getting mildly bad cramps?” you nod again and the father of your child blanches.
Jesus, you don’t make it seem like you’re going through a rough time. You really may just be stronger than you look.
Maybe this is what Maya meant about you going through a difficult time.
“So, the things you want to look out for are lightheadedness, cramps, very little vaginal bleeding, breast changes, food aversions, mood swings, and increased vaginal discharge,” you nod studiously as he grasps what looks like a wand in hand.
“You got all that, dad?” Yoongi’s eyes widen and he points to himself in confusion.
“Who? Me?” he asks aloud and you hide your smirk behind your hand as the doctor nods.
“Yeah, you. You got her into this mess, right?” yhe doctor jokes as he rolls a condom onto the end of the wand.
Yoongi scoffs gently. “Well it takes two to tango.” he mumbles to himself uncomfortably.
Your giggle makes him instantly relax. This isn’t the first time this has happened and it’s beginning to really freak him the fuck out. Sometimes, the things you do calm him so easily, set him into such a state of peace. It’s terrifying.
“This may be uncomfortable for you. I’m going to insert this and we’ll be able to see your baby,” the doctor says to you.
With a nod, you look at the black screen of the ultrasound machine. Yoongi buries his face farther into his phone at the mention of seeing his kid.
But, he’s pulled out almost instantaneously as you squeak out uncomfortably as the wand invades you. Your hand grips tighter in his and his eyes are on you in a second.
“You’re alright. Don’t worry,” he doesn’t know where the kind words came from but he doesn’t take them back.
The screen begins to shift to dark greys and whites, earning Yoongi’s attention.
“We may be able to hear a heartbeat, we’ll find out.” the doctor says happily.
You wriggle uncomfortably as the wand continues to invade you. Squeezing your hand a few times to try and set you right, Yoongi stares at the screen with a raised eyebrow.
“There!” the doctor says loudly and you both jump with nervousness as you see the small blip on the screen.
It’s so small.
You feel your throat clenching uncomfortably and you close your eyes for a second to make sure this is real.
For Yoongi, he feels his heart begin to beat faster. He can practically hear it in his ears as he squeezes your hand tighter.
This was his kid. He fucking made this. He has to become a parent to this small little thing.
“Oh my God.” he mumbles to himself, but in the large silent room you can hear him so clearly.
“Let’s see if we can hear the heartbeat,” the doctor says before pushing a button on the machine.
The sound is voraciously loud in your ears. The heartbeat is strong and unwavering. It makes you smile. Although this isn’t what you had planned, it feels good to see your child.
Yoongi lets go of your hand quickly, as if you had burnt him. He pockets his phone and his hands before looking down at the ground uncomfortably.
“What do you think, dad?” the doctor asks him happily.
What the fuck does he think? That this is terrifying. That he made a child he has to take care of. He thinks that he’s not ready, at all!
But, it’s his child. That heartbeat -- he made that. He created something so small and so perfect.
His eyes begin to burn uncomfortably, as if he’s about to cry and he makes his way back to the seat before plopping down and taking in a deep breath.
“I think it looks like some sort of weird worm,” he replies to the doctor.
Snorting gently, you tilt your head at the screen.
“Like a sesame gremlin,” you say.
Just your words make him chuckle and he looks down at his shoes before closing his eyes once more.
“So the baby’s heartbeat is really strong which is great! From the size, it’s about five weeks and three days old. Everything looks great, but you’ll be coming back once a month to make sure things aren’t changing or getting out of hand. We’ll take a blood test now to see how your levels are but other than that, things look really good over here. Congratulations.” 
That was the first time either of you have been congratulated on the news.
Yoongi can feel himself filling with something akin to pride.
It almost makes him respect you more. You’re carrying his child.
Looking over at you, he feels as if he’s never actually looked at you before. He’s always known how beautiful you are. But now something feels different. It feels explosive. Like something cosmic was coming into being.
“I’m going to give you some prenatal vitamins for you to take, no smoking, no drinking, no raw fish, no hot tubs or saunas, you should eat really well, drink a lot of water and make sure you just take it easy,” the doctor says as he pulls the wand from you.
You can feel a weight lifting off of you as you look at your child. You certainly aren’t ready. You would never begin to call yourself ready but just seeing the child within you makes you hopeful.
“That’s it?” Yoongi asks the doctor, ripping his gaze away from you.
“That’s it! We’ll take the blood in another room near the elevator before you leave. I’ll get Mira to take her blood,” the doctor takes off his gloves and throws them in the garbage before clapping his hands finitely.
He helps you down from the examination table and you excuse yourself to the restroom suddenly feeling the urge to pee.
While he waits, Yoongi can’t stop staring at the screen. While the heartbeat isn’t loud in his ears any longer, the image of his child is still staring him dead in the face.
“Do you print those pictures?” he asks softly, looking over at the closed bathroom door.
“I can if you want me to.” the doctor replies as he sanitizes the examination table.
Yoongi nods at the thought. “Yeah. Can you print two sets?”
Waiting for the elevator, you squeeze your arm tightly trying to stop the blood flow from when Mira took your blood. She was eyeing Yoongi the whole time like a five star meal and it only got more uncomfortable as the minutes ticked on.
“Here.” the CEO says as he hands you a white envelope.
You look down at the package before tilting your head as you both get on to the elevator.
“What is it?” you ask as you open it up.
“The kid’s pictures. Thought you would want some of our sesame gremlin.” his voice sounds distant but you begin to smile at the small black and white photos before you.
“Did you get some for yourself?” you ask happily as you put the pictures in your purse.
He hits the button for the ground floor before leaning back against the railing of the elevator as it descends.
“Why would I need pictures of a five week old kid?” he retorts.
You shrug with a smirk before looking down into your purse and staring at the pictures.
His hand brushes the pocket of his suit pants, feeling his wallet that secretly holds the picture of your child.
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The drive to Yoongi’s mansion sends butterflies fluttering around in your gut. This is like going to a new school in the middle of the year and being awkward and uncomfortable. The silence in the Rolls Royce apart from the random gusts of wind that come through the window don’t help either.
Yoongi is completely comfortable, his legs are outstretched as he scrolls through his phone. You wonder if there’s ever a time where he doesn’t look like he stepped right out of Time magazine.
“Oh, here.” he says as he pulls out a credit card before handing it to you.
You hold the black card in your hand for a second, the weight is as light as paper but just the notion feels heavy.
You throw the card into your purse without a second thought and you miss how Yoongi smirks at your actions.
“You’ll also have a driver. I picked out Minho. But, if you don’t like him then I can get someone else.” his voice is flippant. He’s probably used to firing a bunch of people without wondering about their home life and how much they need their jobs.
The car pulls up to the gated community which Yoongi lives in. Now, you too.
“Welcome to my home. Well...our home.” He says as the car drives past a large fountain that is spurting water on all sides.
You take in a bunch of large mansions as the car drives down the large stretch of road that is lined by pretty cherry blossom trees. Everything about this is so picturesque. You can imagine just how gorgeous his house must be.
“Wow!” your voice is above a whisper as you look off into the distance. You can see a few people riding horses in the far off distance.
“Namjoon’s wife loves horses. She breeds them for contests.” Yoongi states as he follows your gaze.
Leena has told you so much about high profile life, but actually being here surrounded by what feels like billions of dollars is jarring. It’s almost difficult to put into words.
Every stone, every tree, even the flowers seem like they’re perfectly placed as you continue to drive.
“Don’t go into Sera’s wing please. I don’t want to hear her bitch,” he grumbles as he puts his fist beneath his chin.
You give a small nod to him understanding before looking ahead as his mansion comes into view.
“You got knocked up by the right person, huh?” he chuckles as your mouth opens slightly at the sight.
The face of the house is enough to make someone weep, it’s all marble with black quarts trimming and large perfectly clean windows. Each piece of marble is perfectly cut and precise. It’s almost too beautiful to look at.
“I had an architect from Greece come out and build my home. I used to live in it alone until y’know, the demon came.” he says as the car drives around the large marble fountain in front.
“Jeez.” you whisper as he gets out of the car first.
You follow behind him not knowing where to look and wanting to look at all of it. The house spreads out wide and surrounding it are gorgeously cut hedges and tall growing flowers that look perfectly taken care of.
“So. The first two wings on the bottom floor are the gallery. Don’t fucking touch anything. There’s millions of dollars in paintings and statues.” Yoongi says as he steps up the black quartz stairs.
There’s even a man at the front to open up the double doors for him. Which is ridiculously posh and so completely out of your element. Your eyes gaze upward taking the whole house in and you swallow at the sight.
“Little dove, I really don’t have all day. Get your pert ass inside.” Yoongi calls to you as he enters without you.
You follow behind him clumsily, thanking the doorman who gives you a smile in return.
Stepping into the entryway, you can all but marvel at how gorgeous everything is. You do not belong here.
“It’s like a museum,” you whisper and you jump at how loud your voice is in the quiet area.
“Whenever I go out of the country, I like to pick up art or a statue. They’re collectors pieces. Do not fucking touch anything.” he warns you. 
Nodding quickly, you look down the large stretch of the front wings before following him as he continues into the house.
You'll definitely have to look at all of the beautiful art later.
His hands clasp behind his back and you grip tighter onto your purse afraid to touch anything.
None of this looks real, it’s so grandiose and so amazing that it feels like you’ve stepped into a movie.
“Both of these staircases lead up to either wing. Our wing is the right one.”
Walking past the staircases, you spot a sitting room filled with luxurious black furniture and so many throw pillows you have no idea how anyone would sit on them. They seem like they’ve never been touched before. A bar lines the wall behind it and your eyes widen at how fancy it looks. Mirrors line the back of the bar and the dark oak trimming really brings the room together.
“We don’t sit down here in the sitting room. It’s more for show. Doesn’t mean you can’t, it’s your house now too. But, you have your own living room upstairs in your room.” Yoongi says and you turn to him slowly as he leans against a carved marble pillar.
“I have a living room in my bedroom?” you ask softly to which he grins.
“Yeah. Doesn’t everyone?” he quips with a chuckle.
You blanch at the thought before rolling your eyes as he winks at you.
“Come.” he commands as he pushes off the pillar.
“Holy shit.” you mumble as you walk further into the house.
The kitchen is fully open, with two marble islands and top of the range equipment that make you gasp. There’s a long bar lined with chairs that barricades the kitchen from you so you can eat and it makes you blink rapidly at the sight. You can see people working in it, keeping the place tidy and at the mere sight of Yoongi they bow deeply before returning back to work.
“We have a chef from five in the morning to twelve at night.” Yoongi tells you as he leans against the long bar.
The chandeliers that line the place are absolutely beautiful and yet again, you have no idea where to look.
“This is the dining room, where we don’t eat because it’s for parties and I don’t host parties. The leech does.” Yoongi says as he slides open two cherry wood doors beside the kitchen. The table is long and beautiful bouquets of flowers line the cherry wood top.
“Jesus Christ.” you whisper as you clutch the purse tighter to your body.
He closes up the doors before putting his hand on your lower back and pushing you past the kitchen.
“This door right here leads to the maid’s quarters. You don’t have any reason to go there.”
You nod to him as a maid opens up the door before bowing to you both and heading towards the kitchen.
“This is the library slash poker room. Thursday nights are for poker. It’s one of my hobbies.” he says as he grips the gold handles before shoving open the doors.
You’ve always loved reading, maybe in here you can find some good books and take them to your bedroom to read.
“Do you like reading?” he asks softly as you step inside.
“I love reading!” you reply as your fingers graze the marble bookshelves that line the walls from top to bottom.
You then realize how rude it was of you to just barge in and start touching stuff. “Sorry.” you murmur as Yoongi walks over to the bar caddy.
He pours himself a glass of whisky before shaking his head at you.
“This is your home now too. You don’t have to be scared, little dove.” he says above the lip of his glass before downing the contents in one burning go.
Your eyes spot a few books that look interesting and you make a mental note to check them out later when you’re settled in.
“Past this room is the game room. There’s a pool table and some old fashioned pinball machines. Stuff for decoration mostly.” 
It brings up a question that just bursts free from you.
“So you’re exorbitantly rich, you have all of these cool things inside of your home and you never use any of them?” you ask as he closes the library doors behind you.
“Well in order to be exorbitantly rich, you need to work hard. I don’t have time to just sit on my ass and play Pac Man all damn day, little dove.” he whispers in your ear. You blush at how insensitive it must have sounded.
“Through those glass doors is the indoor pool. It’s heated but not too hot for the baby,” he tells you as a maid opens the doors for you both.
He comes to realize that was the first time he hasn’t called your child ‘kid’ or ‘thing’ around you.
Maybe seeing the small sesame gremlin on the screen really did do something to him.
“Wow. This is amazing Yoongi. Your parents must be so proud of you.” you say as you walk along the heated floor of the pool. He chuckles to himself as you look at the marble recliners that are for relaxing on the side.
“Parents.” he snort at the notion.
He tilts his head cryptically as you look out the glass walls of the room. It’s almost as if you’re in a snow globe. Every wall is glass, there’s some stained glass pieces that fleck the floor with pretty colors as the sun comes out from behind a cloud.
“Shall we go up to our win-” his voice is cut off by screaming in the distance and you jump at the screeching noise.
“That’s the leech. She probably lost a follower on Instagram.” he says as his hand wraps around your arm before tugging you toward the noise.
While you haven’t been fully versed in just how evil Sera is, you’re positively nervous to see her. Leena told you to look her up on the Internet but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You were too frightened for what you would find.
“Sir!” the voice is absolutely elated and so sweet sounding that it puts a small smile on your face.
Yoongi positively lights up as an older woman approaches the both of you from the maid’s quarters. Her hair is in a neat bun and her clothes are wrinkle free. She seems a bit older and has a tan to her skin as if she’s been out in the sun working.
“Y/N. This is Maya. Head maid.” you shake her hand happily as Yoongi begins to smile.
“It’s so nice to meet you! I've heard amazing things about you!” you say happily as she puts her hands on her hips.
“Well! Aren’t you just absolutely gorgeous! Welcome to the home Madam, I’m so happy to be of service to you!” Her words are so kind and she’s so sweet but it’s the intent of the words that make you feel uncomfortable.
“Oh, Maya. No. You can call me Y/N. You don’t have to treat me like Yo-”
“Nonsense! You’re a big part of the home just as much as the other two that live here! Don’t be silly!” you hum uncomfortably as Yoongi snorts.
“Please be as kind to Maya as you possibly can. She’s an angel.” 
This is the first time that you’ve heard him speak so kindly about someone. It’s heartwarming, if you’re being honest.
“Let me take your purse.” Maya says softly, noticing how you clutch onto it for comfort.
“Oh no. It’s okay.”
“Give her the purse, little dove.” Yoongi retorts before snapping his fingers as you pass the kitchen.
“Yes, Sir?” a woman in the kitchen asks as he stops short.
“What do you like? Strawberry? Lemon?” he asks as he leans into the long marble bar.
“Both.” you reply curiously.
“Strawberry lemon sparkling water. And a vintage whisky. Now.” he calls out before turning back to you and Maya.
“Show Maya the pictures.” he says as his whisky is handed to him.
He must love her a lot. His demeanor seems to change when she’s around like no other.
Digging into your purse, you pull out the black and white pictures of your baby before handing them to her.
“Oh my goodness! Look at this! How amazing! With such a handsome father and a beautiful mother, your baby is going to be absolutely breathtaking!” Maya says and her voice seems to choke up as she stares at the picture. She turns thoughtful as her thumb swipes slowly over the picture in hand.
“I raised Yoongi from when he was very little, y’know.” Maya says proudly as she hands you back the pictures.
That’s news to you.
“Okay, Maya.” Yoongi mumbles uncomfortably.
“You did a great job,” you compliment her and her smile is megawatt as she rubs your arm comfortingly with her hand.
Yoongi smirks above the rim of his glass before tilting his head. Maybe you two would get along, you’re kind enough and Maya certainly is. Maybe there won’t be so much toxicity around the mansion anymore.
“Do you like to cook?” you ask her gently as Yoongi pulls the seat out of the bar for you to sit.
“I love cooking! Although Frederic is in the kitchen seven days a week, I hardly get to use it.” Maya says as she fixes Yoongi’s tie. 
You watch how well she takes care of him, how she babies him and how he doesn’t move or feel uncomfortable at the notion. It’s like watching a rabid dog be kind only to his owner.
“Maybe soon, we can get in the kitchen together. I love cooking too. Give Frederic the night off.” you offer with a smile.
The smile lines by her eyes crease in delight at your suggestion. “That would be a lot of fun. I’d love that.”
“I would get a night off? That sounds amazing to me.” you hear a heavy French accent behind you and you turn to the chef as he hands you your water. He winks at you with a smile and you return it before sipping your water.
“Wow!” you whisper at the taste.
“Everything is better in the higher class.” Yoongi whispers.
“MAYA!” You hear scream throughout the mansion and you cringe at the sharp noise.
Jesus, she is loud.
Everyone in this house is so nice and kind. Even if you feel uncomfortable living here, the people may make up for it.
“Yes, Madam?” Maya calls sweetly as her thin frame peeks down from the second floor.
Even from far away Sera is blindingly beautiful. Her cheekbones are high and filled perfectly, her lips are the perfect pout and her eyes are big and doe-like. She’s absolutely stunning.
“Didn’t I fucking tell you to put a different fabric softener in the laundry? I don’t like my clothes smelling like a fucking flower field!” She barks out as she throws something off of the marble balcony onto the floor.
“I’m sorry, Madam. I must have forgotten. I won’t forget again.” Maya promises as she scurries over to the dropped shirt.
It’s almost a sin to watch the sweet woman fumble over herself to please her. While she may be beautiful, she’s a bitch. And, you’d hate to be confronted by her by any means.
“Bitch.” you and Yoongi mumble at the same time. He chuckles to himself as her gaze lands on you and you find yourself wanting to cower but the way Maya shifts nervously makes you angry. Really fucking angry.
“What the fuck is that? A new maid? Or a dig ditcher?” Sera barks out as she points her perfectly manicured finger at you.
Yoongi opens his mouth to speak but you beat him to it. “I’m Y/N. The mother of Yoongi’s child.” you call to her.
Her face begins to flush pink before she’s scoffing. “Should have picked someone prettier Yoongi, ugly women make ugly kids!” she calls down to him as she retreats back to her wing.
“Ugly personalities make ugly people.” you retort softly, bringing your glass of water to your lips.
The father of your child chuckles softly beside you and your heart warms at the noise.
“That’s the leech. I’m sure you’re thrilled to have met her.” you hum playfully in agreement before hopping off the bar stool.
The only thing in Yoongi’s mind is just how right this all feels. How perfect you are as a person, to each and every person you see. You’re strong willed and stronger than he previously thought but he likes it. And, he wants to see you come out of your shell here. He wants to see you thrive like a flower.
Maybe he should ease up on being so downright negative around you.
“Let’s do the rest of the tour and then you can relax. Alright?” he asks as he guides you to the staircase.
“Madam!” Maya calls to you and you don’t register the word for a second before turning to her with a smile.
“I’m really happy you’re here.” Maya says sweetly and you giggle as she bows to you.
“Me too, Maya. Thank you for being so welcoming!” you reply happily as you ascend the steps with the CEO.
“One half is mine, the other half is yours. My side is the right side and yours is, well obviously, the left.” Yoongi says as his hand drifts over the black quartz wall.
At the end of the long wing, you can spot rushing waterfalls that come out of the walls and into the floor, the sound is comforting as you get closer.
“So the third floor of the mansion is for my hobbies in particular and my home office. I rarely use my home office but it’s up there if you ever need me and I work from home.” Hobbies? What kind of hobbies does he have?
“Taehyung told me that you like painting? Apparently Leena talks a lot about you in her post coital glow-” you laugh at his words as he swings the first door open, “- So I got you some painting supplies and turned this room into a studio for you. It’s really bright so you can work well.”
It’s so thoughtful. The studio is beautiful, canvases of all sizes line the walls and the amount of paints and brushes are almost too good to be true.
“Thank you, Yoongi. That’s so kind of you.” you say as you step into the room.
Your fingers gently graze over the fluffy heads of the brushes before turning to him in the doorway and smiling.
“I do love to paint.” you say happily as he leans against the door jamb with folded arms.
“I just won’t paint anything orange.” he rolls his eyes with a snort at your comment before pushing off of the doorway and moving on to the next room.
“This is your closet. I had all of your clothes moved in here, even the ones you insisted on bringing here. I’m a giver.” 
You roll your eyes at how degrading he is and you don’t even open the doors to your closet as you walk past.
You don’t care about materialistic objects like clothes or bags. You think the mansion is gorgeous but it’s just all materialistic stuff! It shouldn’t mean that much to someone.
“This is the nursery. It’s pretty empty still. Maya thought it would be a good idea to put in the rocking chair she used with me so...that’s in there.” 
The admission makes your eyebrows raise. She must have taken care of him from when he was so small. Maybe Maya is like his mother, that’s why he loves her so much.
“Then this room is your room,” he continues on, not wanting to stand in the nursery for longer than two minutes. Just looking into the room reminds him of the pictures that sit heavily in his wallet.
When you open the doors to your room, the wind is almost knocked out of you. This is not a room. This is a fucking house. A small living room and a television situate themselves before your eyes and you walk around the thin marble wall that shields your bedroom from view.
You have a balcony, sitting chairs, a fucking vanity and the bed is so gigantic it can probably hold four people comfortably with room to spare.
Even the sight of the en suite bathroom is enough to knock you on your ass.
“Jesus Christ. This is... Wow.” you say breathlessly as you sit down on your bed.
“Now do the finer objects in life hold weight?” Yoongi jokes as he sits down in the armchair by the balcony.
“Not everything is about money, Yoongi.” you retort as your hand skims over the plush black comforter.
“No. Not everything. But, it’s still nice.” he says as he lifts his whisky glass to his lips.
“There’s a television in the bench at the end of the bed.” he whispers loudly across the room to you.
“A...television in a bench?” you mutter pulling your legs off of the bench and onto the bed.
“Mmmhmmm.” he drolls with a chuckle.
You’re so absolutely stunned at all of this. This is where you live now. This is your home.
He can tell just how starry eyed you are by all of this. It must be overwhelming to be thrust into such money from out of nowhere.
“I’ll leave you to it then.” he says as he slaps his knee. Your mouth opens and your hand raises to wave goodbye but he doesn’t look back at you.
You look around your room once more taking in all of the new gadgets and toys before throwing yourself back on your bed. Your hair fans out around your head as you stare up at the silver chandelier above you.
“Jesus Christ.” You mumble before turning and pressing your face into a pillow.
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Next Chapter --->
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Third Wheeling Taglist- @wickizer, @imluckybitches, @slothykreuger, @claireelise19, @ggukkieland, @rspbrryy, @iv-bts, @bambuzlee, @chanelbts, @mxxngxdss, @bluewhale52, @milesjeon11, @diamonddia-mond, @vinylphwoar, @yxnxxli, @hubbytaehyung, @140503at-dawn, @bts-7beauts, @jadeblackwoll, @sunshiine-hobii, @creatorspalace, @eclectically-esoteric, @nikkiordonez12, @kaitswrld, @skamlover200, @sevgilove98, @kooeuphoria, @jikooksgirl19, @hobbledehoy26, @singular-itae, @dchimminie, @lowlifeoeuvre, @sugaslittlekookies, @bloopbloopb, @pjmcth, @softysuho, @codeinbelle, @jaiuneamesolitaiire, @betysotelo18, @jeonmisha, @iwanttohitmyself, @ayyyocee, @neverthefirstchoice, @itsbangtanoclock, @little7bitchh, @veryuniquenamegoeshere, @deathkat657, @firstlovesuga-93, @namjoonia, @paperpurple, @muzikabijou, @liebeoppa, @veronawrites, @kleff03, @ruinsofangels, @brightwingr5, @leekanchol, @rkivemagic, @ithinkileftmycoatoutside, @melaninkpops, @y00ngisbabygirl, @ungodlyjoon, @prochnost513, @dunixxd, @athenakyle, @igotnotype, @chxmachxps, @tinymintyoongi, @vangameren-blog, @alpaca1612, @ohcarolinamin, @thegreatestsushi, @jooniebugg, @eltrain80, @btsmylife21, @deeepvibes, @httpminyg, @deliciouslydisturbed365​, @rkchmestizangmaldita​, @jimin-chu​, 
Some people couldn’t be tagged, I’m so sorry about that!
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enigma-absolute · 3 years ago
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10, 17, and 18 for the Eddsworld asks! >:3c
10. What do you think is the funniest joke in the series?
Damn, that’s a GOOD question. So much so that I had look back on a couple eddisodes to make me think, but here’s my response.
I think it’s in the comics.
Not that the show doesn’t have some great jokes, but the funniest of them for me are within the comics. Specifically with Edd’s last era prior to Space Face releasing, and a little into the start of Legacy. They were how I got into Eddsworld in the first place.
A good chunk of my improvised humour was learned from Edd’s ability to make anything a visual or linguistic pun. I get more of a chuckle out of stuff such as ‘immature cheese’, ‘wrapper in my pocket’, ‘Dr Names’ and that one arc of Matt getting an honest-to-god date.
That being said, I loved seeing Tom getting spun around and yeeted by that tank in the Moviemakers montage. Also, from the end of said montage:
Laurel: I wonder what happened to all those space cats... Edd: Well, do you see that tiny speck up in the sky? Laurel: Yeah? Edd: That isn’t them. They’re dead.
Edd’s delivery of that line legit makes me crack a grin and chuckle.
17. Which Eddsworld character do you relate to the most, and why?
Again, good question.
After thinking on it a bit, I think it’d still be Edd, and not just because he’s my favourite.
In the classic era, he’s the artist/animator, the one who initiates the initiative of the episodes and is simultaneously DONE with his friends’ antics AND eggs them on further.
Sounds like my kind of guy.
(Actually, on a writer’s note, Edd taking the initiative for adventures is what I think has been missing from much of Legacy AND Beyond’s writing. He took the initiative to go to Atlantis when Matt lost the fridge keys, and when Tom bought that film camera with all their life savings, he took the initiative of making a film instead of just relying on a 2008 YouTube clickbait video Tom made. His friends started it, sure, but EDD was the one who kept saying ‘alright, let’s go get this stuff done’ AND DID IT.)
(I think I could write a whole thing on how this is really the show’s Writing Engine, and how it started to vanish circa Hammer and Fail Part Two and Space Face, but that’s another day. Or time. Or ask. Speaking of writing…)
18. If you could write an episode, what would it be about?
Oh BOY. Buckle up, I’ve got several ideas swirling in my head and I’m about to pitch them - hell, if any of you think they have standing power, hit me up and we can figure out a way to team up and make them exist!
Suction Cup Man vs Tord’s Giant Robot. It’s a more fully fleshed-out version of the voice-acting post I did for a skit a while back, and I’m unashamed to say that it’s a roughly copied plot of SCM 2 (including references to it and all).
Suction Cup Man gets captured by a mystery man from the future to take down some jerk’s giant robot in the present. Cut to The End Part Two with Tord gloating in the giant robot, and it all goes to chaos from here.
Fun fact about this one: I’ve already handwritten most of the script’s first draft, and have three different endings planned out, but I’m not sure which one would be best for the skit. They’re all good in their own ways, but whilst I had the initial idea to PrynceJJayden of twitter fame, I’m not sure if he’d be accepting of script pitches from other people at this point in time. On top of that, I don’t know if his VA talent who does Tord (@/The_Rey_Rey on twitter) would be keen to do that sort of thing too.
PowerEdd 2: The Devious Drenchings of Doctor H2O. (Formerly titled The Eddvengers, but considering there’s an AU with that name already, this seems more appropriate.)
When a freak science experiment near the antiques store strikes the lads, Edd’s superhero powers return, and this time Tom and Matt join with their own. But their enemy isn’t an evil director or an old friend, but some maniac with a drinking water tank on his head and a desire to sink London into his New Atlantis.
If the name ‘Doctor H2O’ sounds familiar to some of you, he was actually a villain character Edd Gould created! You can find an uncoloured drawing of him from Edd’s old tumblr from about 2011.
This story idea also has some meat to it - lore pages on how their powers worked, old script bits, writing ideas - with the intention of becoming an audio drama as so not to stress out animators. I still have the notebook I scrawled the idea out in from years ago, and I even had some concept art from current-day EW animator Fran Pun!
Unfortunately, as much as the more influential people behind the first attempt had resources, fame and means to make it, this one fell onto the back burner due to unclear plot beats (my fault), no scheduling (this was just a bad habit in general from said people) and one of my co-writers just… not going anywhere with it. Some jokes from him felt a little forced. Gratefully though, I still have the intro scene script somewhere in my drives, and I think it holds up. I’d love to come back to this one someday.
Miniseries: Through the Time Machine
Saloonatics had the Wild West, WTFuture gave us time travel, so what if we went back and forth in time to find our favourite lads having adventures in other points of history?
Before Penguins of Madagascar was my first fandom experience, Phineas and Ferb was my first Fan experience, even just from mostly flash games online and watching the episodes in pieces on YouTube. But what I remembered most was a miniseries of specials where the formula for the show was translated into different time periods and story genres to give a unique flavouring to the stories.
So come on, imagine: Eddsworld Caveman episode. Eddsworld pirates episode. Eddsworld Medieval episode. Even an Eddsworld Y2K Futurism… future… episode. (Look, all I’m saying is that the aesthetic could SLAP.)
Would there be an overarching plot? Not really, they could just be for fun! And I’d love to throw my hat in the ring to try it out. It’d be so much fun!
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callmebrycelee · 2 years ago
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NEW AMSTERDAM REACTION
This reaction is for the season 5, fifth episode titled "Grabby Hands" which originally aired on October 18, 2022. The episode was written by Graham Norris and directed by Lisa Robinson. Spoilers ahead!
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Since my last reaction got a bit longish, I'm going to keep this one as short and sweet as possible. I want to start off by saying I really liked this episode. With each episode we are getting in this final season, I'm reminded why I fell in love with this series in the first place. This week's episode is all about good intentions and how our desire to help those we care about can result in them getting hurt or worse. Let's start with Dr. Lauren Bloom.
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Lauren moved in with her sister at the beginning of this season despite protests from her friends and colleagues. Lauren wants to reconnect with Vanessa (Kathryn Prescott). Both of them have endured immense amounts of trauma which has resulted in them both becoming addicted to drugs and alcohol. Thankfully, Lauren has been sober for two years and has somehow miraculously remained so while rooming with her sister who seems perpetually drunk and high. Lauren has been faking taking shots just so she can win her trust. While Lauren's desire to re-establish her relationship with Vanessa is pure, her approach is all wrong.
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At the end of the episode, Vanessa finds Lauren's sobriety chip and flips out. I felt so bad for Lauren in this moment but I also understand why her sister is upset. It would feel super violating to have someone come into your home, cozy up to you, and lie to you daily. What Lauren's done for the past four episodes can be filed under the category of manipulation. Again, I get that she wants things between her sister to be like they were before both their worlds came crashing down, but Lauren also needs to realize that her sister is an addict and just as she made the decision to clean herself up, Vanessa will need to make a similar decision. Sorry, Lauren. I'm #TeamVanessa on this one. I do hope things between these two can work out in the future but a lot of healing needs to be done.
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Next up is Dr. Floyd Reynolds. When three patients arrive in the emergency room exhibiting the signs of a rare poisoning. When Max and Lauren figure out that the three patients live in the same building, Floyd leaves New Amsterdam and makes his way over to the apartment building. What follows is a montage of Floyd interviewing the residents of the building and learning about all the things that are wrong. Apparently the place is laden with black mold, rats, spiders, and a host of other issues that made me think perhaps maybe the building should be condemned or burned to the ground.
Allow me to digress for a bit. I get why New York City is so appealing. Having visited there back when I was in high school, it was a nice change of pace from living in a smaller town in the south. I loved how much culture was there. On any given day, there's so much to do. Museums ... Broadway plays ... sports ... the best restaurants ... I get why people visit the place. What I don't understand is why anyone would want to live there. On top of the rent being sky-high, it seems like everything is so grimy and miserable. Hearing these characters talk about all the money they pay just to live in a rat-infested hell-hole made me so appreciative of my small town life.
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Once again, we have another doctor at New Amsterdam with good intentions. For some reason that's not readily apparent, Floyd becomes invested in wanting to solve each of these residents' issues. He suggests that maybe they pay extra in rent so the owner can afford to fix their apartment up. Naturally the residents poo-poo this idea because they barely have the money to pay rent as is on top of paying medical bills. Just when things are starting to feel hopeless for Floyd, he comes up with an idea that would involve the residents paying more, only instead of them paying rent, they would be paying a mortgage. New Amsterdam would foot the bill by giving them a loan. I do find it funny that the whole narrative of New Amsterdam, since season one, has been how broke the place is yet they are able to give out substantial loans to random people in the neighborhood but I suppose I'll overlook this detail in favor of celebrating what seems like a win for Floyd. 
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A part of me thinks that when it comes to his personal life, Floyd feels helpless. Every relationship he has never seems to work out which is why he is too scared to try something new with Gabrielle, the new nurse at the hospital. By the end of the episode, it seems like he may be open to trying something, even if it's temporary. Oh, another funny part of this episode was Floyd trying to figure out what her name is after she didn't tell him in the last episode. Him making guesses felt very Rumplestilskin to me. Up next is Dr. Iggy Frome. While Max, Lauren, and Elizabeth are holding things down at the hospital, Iggy takes four of his teenage psych patients out for a day in nature. As he tries to garner some enthusiasm out of them, he notices they are more preoccupied with their phones than with whatever he is talking about. He pulls over and demands they turn over their cellular devices and he hands his own phone in out of solidarity which is such a bad idea. 
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Speaking of good intentions, Iggy is concerned the teens may be too focused on their technology instead of the world that's around them. This is a valid concern, especially from a behavioral health provider. However, rather than be reminded of the saying, everything in moderation, Iggy overcorrects and his actions result in the five of them getting lost in the woods. Well, you know what they say, when it rains, it pours. Literally. After huddling near a tree during a pop-up storm, Iggy and the teens build a fire in the middle of the woods. What's interesting is that no one seems too terribly upset with Iggy for getting them lost in the woods.
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Perhaps the funniest part of the episode is when a notification goes off and everyone looks at one of the teens who assures them the sound they heard was a bird. The notification goes off again and finally the kid reveals that while he did turn in his phone, he kept his iPad which has both power and a signal. With iPad in hand, Iggy is able to lead the kids back to the van and back to civilization. Iggy, it seems, has learned a valuable lesson. His good intentions backfired on him and someone, including himself, could've gotten hurt in the process. One of the biggest complaints about Iggy is how impulsive he is, especially in his personal life. Often his actions result in those around him - his kids, his soon-to-be ex-husband, Martin - getting hurt. I hope we get to see him spend the rest of the season growing because as I've said before, Iggy Frome is my favorite character on the show. 
Last up is Dr. Max Goodwin. Last episode, he got some pretty unsettling news concerning his health, however, we don't really get to deal with that this episode. Instead, we start the episode off watching him and Luna making breakfast. Luna is little and wants to help out but Max is too focused on making sure she doesn't climb up on anything or make a mess. He wants to keep her safe but ultimately she still gets hurt when she picks up a knife and cuts her finger.
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Max takes Luna to work with him and Auntie Lauren patches up her finger. I loved seeing Luna interact with Lauren because it's yet another reminder of how the doctors are each other's family. With Luna's problem temporarily fixed with a finger stitch (ha, that rhymes), Max has to deal with one of his nurses getting arrested after she accidentally administered a fatal dose of a drug that killed a patient. The nurse's arrest has a ripple effect around the hospital when other nurses start second-guessing their actions out of fear of making a mistake that could get them sued or worse. 
Max is at his wit's end. On one hand he understands why people would be concerned. Nurses are the first line of defense in healthcare and if a mistake is made, especially one that results in a patient getting hurt or worse, the blame is almost always shifted to them. Max understands why these men and women are concerned but he doesn't think that healthcare providers should prioritize themselves over their patients. While I get where Max is coming from, a part of me thought to myself during this episode that it's easier for Max to have this view because he's a doctor and it's nurses who are feeling the brunt of this.
For once, there are no easy solutions to this issue and it's quite refreshing to see Max not be able to charm his way out of this issue. This is a very real issue and I'm sure there are nurses who watched this particular storyline and felt seen and heard. Ultimately Max's solution is to keep fighting which doesn't really feel like a solution at all. Accidents will keep on happening because accidents happen and fingers will yet again be pointed at the nurse who was involved. It's just a fact of life. However, with that said, Max's non-solution felt very realistic. So much of what's wrong in healthcare and in society, in general, is unfixable. The way the system is configured makes it next to impossible to implement any positive change and I'm glad this show is finally acknowledging that. It's a bleak ending to this particular storyline but at least Max is able to fix things at home.
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At the end of the episode, Max explains to Luna that he loves her and wants to protect her and always will want to protect her. He also tells her that he has to find a way to let her be more independent without letting his concerns get in the way. See, Max gets it! Balance is the key! At the end of the episode, Max finds a way for Luna to help out with making breakfast that gives her independence while in a safe environment. I love seeing Max and Luna together. I know it must be rough being a single parent. I just hope that whatever is going on with his health is curable because Luna has lost so much and I don't want her to lose Max.
As I said earlier, this was a great episode. Sure, some of the plots were a bit shaky and the resolutions were a bit questionable, but ultimately I was thoroughly entertained by this episode. What made this episode particularly enjoyable is getting to delve deeper into these characters we've grown to love. Each of our characters learned valuable lessons about good intentions this episode and a few of them got hurt in the process. I do think Lauren will be able to make peace with her sister, even if it means they don't have a relationship. I think Reynolds will finally find what he is looking for, which is someone to love and for the person to love him back. Iggy is finally starting to learn that simply having good intentions is not enough. He's hurt a lot of people, including himself, and it was nice to see him take some accountability for once. As for Max, he's learning that life isn't fair and that sometimes instead of fighting to win, you have to fight to maintain. I can't wait to see what happens next! Until next time ...
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theparanormalperiodical · 4 years ago
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Top 10 Controversial Horror Films That Are Famous For All The Wrong Reasons *gags* *cries*
At the beating heart of horror is offence.
From that undeniable sense of something not being quite right, to the CGI-blood-spurtin’-adrenaline-fuelled scenes that leave us shaking in our boots, horror pivots on the knife edge of controversy.
It’s used to drive plots. It’s used to drive hype. And at the end of the month, it drives studio executives to the bank.
Horror films can be traumatic enough. But there are some films that bear the cross of controversy more than others. There are some films that have been branded as so damaging to their potential viewers that merely circulating copies of the film is illegal.
And yet their infamy has forged cult viewership. What was once shielded from us has now become ‘must see’.
Today we are going to be counting down horror’s most controversial films and what made them quite so topical.
*I’m going to star the ones that you can actually watch without getting traumatised. Some are controversial not because of their content but because some religious or political groups disagreed with them*
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#10 - The Blair Witch Project (1999)*
Let’s ease in with a classic - a classic you can watch without sleeping with the light on.
In this found-footage flick we see a team of film students as they explore a local urban legend. But what they find leads them to unknown and ungodly territory.
The problem with this film is that it was marketed as a true story. No, not based on a true story, a true story. Yep, they claimed what we were seeing was real, found footage of some teens going mad as they forage deeper into mysterious woods.
IMBd went so far as to report that the actors were dead. Then, the movie studio super-charged their efforts to confirm to the public that not only was this film 100% real, the three main actors were still missing. The parents of the actors then started receiving sympathy cards.
There’s even a mocked up website that perpetuates these claims. 
#9 - Night Of The Living Dead (1968)*
Time for another not-too-disturbing film.
This is the original zombie apocalypse film saw a group of Americans attempt to survive an incoming attack of the undead while trapped in a rural farmhouse.
But the Motion Picture Association of America wasn’t too happy about it. The film rating system was yet to be in place, allowing children to also show up for an afternoon screening and be greeted by a 97 minute montage of extreme violence.
“The kids in the audience were stunned. There was almost complete silence. The movie had stopped being delightfully scary about halfway through, and had become unexpectedly terrifying. There was a little girl across the aisle from me, maybe nine years old, who was sitting very still in her seat and crying”
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#8 - Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)
In this psychological film, we watch a random crime spree take place at the hands of a couple serial killers. Loosely based on real murderers Henry Lee Lucas and Ottis Toole, its controversial reputation was founded on the gore ‘n’ guts screened in the movie.
Whilst it didn’t receive much attention from the public, various classification boards across the world ensured new versions edited with certain scenes - often involving sexual assault and necrophilia - removed for viewers.
In 2003, the BBFC (the UK classification board) finally allowed the uncut version to be released and Australia followed suit in 2005.
#7 - I Spit On Your Grave (1978)
It’s the original rape-revenge flick. And it managed to piss everyone off.
Originally titled Day of the Woman, it tells the story of a fiction writer who exacts revenge on a group of four men who gang rape her.
Despite its pro-women claim-to-fame, the 30 minute rape scene begs to differ. Furious debate surrounds its feminist label as a film that forces the audience to endure rape from a female perspective and long-winded violence against men (something which is often reserved for women in horror). Regardless, the graphic violence earned it a steady ban in Ireland, Norway, Iceland, and West Germany.
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#6 - Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)*
You don’t get many controversial Christmas films. They typically stick to a cookie-cutter plot ‘n’ purpose every holiday season. But there are no strong women who need to rediscover the meaning of Christmas here.
Instead, we see a child traumatised by seeing his parents murdered on Christmas Eve go on a seasonal rampage as an adult.
A week after its release in the early 80s, it was pulled from theatres due to backlash. Marketing was focused on a Santa Claus killer with adverts often airing during family-friendly TV programmes and meant numerous children developed a phobia of Father Christmas. Large crowds protested cinemas with one notable protest involving angry families singing carols at the Interboro Quad Theater in The Bronx.
It was only in 2009 - 25 years after its original release - that a DVD of the film was first made available for purchase in the UK.
#5 - Psycho (1960)*
This legendary film follows the disappearance of a young woman after her encounter with a strange man called Norman Bates, one of horror’s most iconic figures. The controversy that would engulf this fim lay not in the violent attack on an innocent woman or even the disturbing content of the film.
Oh, no. It was because of what the leading lady was wearing.
In the opening scene of the film, we see Janet Leigh wearing nothing but a bra.
*gasp*
This racy attire was emblazoned across promotional material, meeting Hitchcock’s high standards of creating controversy around the movie. There was a no late admission policy for movie theaters, and the posters told viewers “Do not reveal the surprises!” to maintain a mysterious aura around the plot twist.
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#4 - The Human Centipede (2009) (all of ‘em)
I’ve watched a lot of horror films, in case you couldn’t tell.
I’m used to watching a scary movie, shaking off the anxiety, and moving on with my life. But there are some that stayed with me. I only watched the trailer for the first movie, and it legitimately traumatised me. It gave me quite a severe, sudden bout of a depression for a solid month when I was 13.
Throughout horror’s goriest franchise, we see an evil doctor and amateur mad scientist attempt to sow several people together into a centipede-like chain from mouth to anus.
*retches*
At the heart of promoting the franchise was controversy. Tom Six, the director, forced a narrative that claimed from the first film that this was "100% medically accurate". He even alleged a Dutch doctor helped inspire the film, confirming that with an IV drip, this was entirely possible.
Although it didn’t receive furore that amounted to serious censorship or long-term banning, it was infamous for having its viewers vomiting in the cinema aisles.
The second film, however, was subject to much more severe controversy and could not legally be supplied in the UK until 2011 due to its heavy focus on sexual abuse, more graphic violence than the original film, and it’s pretty vile depiction of a murderer that was intellectually disabled.
Audiences were used to the graphic nature of the franchise by the third and final release. As the least-controversial and least-enjoyable film according to critics, it barely made a dent in the horror community.
Good riddance, I guess?
#3 - Faces Of Death (1978)
I’m not sure I’d recommend this one per se - but I will give it credit for being an interesting project.
This documentary-style film is a montage of footage of people dying in different ways. As a result of its very graphic and very real content, it was banned and censored in many countries. Only in 2003 was it released on DVD in the UK after a scene was cut featuring dogs fighting and a monkey being beaten to death.
Germany, Australia, and New Zealand followed suit, reversing their bans and releasing edited versions.
However, 7 years after its release, the media revamped its interest in the film after a maths teacher showed it to his class at a Californian high school. Two of his students claimed they were so traumatised they received a costly settlement to reimburse their emotional distress. Things took a darker turn a year later, when a 14 year old bludgeoned a classmate to death with a baseball bat; he claimed he wanted to see what it would be like to actually kill someone after watching Faces of Death.
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#2 - Cannibal Holocaust (1980)
This Italian film’s title alone hints towards two frightening things: flesh-eating humans and genocide. In this found-footage movie we see an anthropologist lead a rescue team into the Amazon rainforest to find a group of filmmakers that went missing.
The rampant graphic content including sexual assault and animal cruelty showcased in the film (7 animals were killed during filming in some pretty horrific ways) led to it being banned in 50 countries.
Some also alleged that a handful of deaths seen in the film were real, as were the missing film crew. In fact, the actors portraying the documentarians signed contracts that stopped them appearing in motion pictures for an entire year to maintain the illusion of reality.
And only 10 days after its premiere, the director was charged with obscenity and the film confiscated. All copies were to be turned over to the authorities. There are currently a range of versions that have been edited to varying degrees and are allowed for circulation.
#1 - A Serbian Film (2010)
No.
Nope.
Don’t do it. Don’t watch this film.
A Serbian Film follows a retired porn star who agrees to feature in an “art film” for some cash. Little does he know this film will include rape, incest, pedophilia, necrophilia…
Just don’t watch it.
It is still banned in South Korea, New Zealand, Australia. It is supposedly a parody of politically correct films made in Serbia that are funded by foreign groups and allegedly speaks openly about post-war society and the struggle for survival.
*shakes head*
Off to have a 3 hour shower, brb.
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Take Your Father to Work Day (S2, E4)
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As many people have said: This is one of the STRONGEST Prodigal Son episodes to date. It was incredible. My time-stamped thoughts for this episode are below. 
I reference Malcolm’s mental health and sexual violence in this one. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading.
SPOILERS AHEAD:
0:16 - OMG. Destiny’s Child. Whoever is in charge of the soundtrack for this show needs a raise. Or an award. It’s SOO GOOD.
0:18 - How great is this montage of Martin’s prison life too? I mean the insane mundanity of it combined with “Survivor” and Michael Sheen’s incredible acting is some perfect mix between hilarious, captivating, and just brilliant. 
1:06 - I feel so bad for Mr.David. He has to deal with Martin’s theatrics every day. Poor guy looks done in this episode.
1:35 - CAN HECTOR BECOME A BIGGER CHARACTER?! PLEASE. He’s hilarious and I love him. “Bro. You got your ass jumped at Sunday School.”
2:09 - Wait. What? Jerry’s getting released?!? I mean, I understand that he’s no longer in need of psychiatric care......but he still killed someone. Shouldn’t he just be getting transferred to a different prison?
2:25 - Does Jerry have a death wish?!?! He’s talking about being released in a room full of jealous murderers. Everyone looks sooooo pissed at Jerry. 
2:54 - Martin is such a liar. However - Michael Sheen’s performance is astoundingly good. Like he shines brighter than usual in this episode. 
 3:17 - Poor Malcolm. “What’s going on?” Poor boy looks terrified. 
3:23 - I love everything about this scene. I love how freaked out Malcolm is. I love you extra Jessica is. BUT HANS. Holy shit. I want Hans in every episode. He’s crazy in a good way and such a beautiful comedic relief. 
3:30 - OMG.  “Skinny milennial” might be the best thing anyone has ever called Malcolm. Someone please tell JT and Dani - hell, even Gil. They would tease him forever and I want to see it. 
3:45 - 1) Malcolm is a terrible liar. 2) Jessica knows he’s lying. 3) This story about the wine is interesting. I wonder when and how Malcolm first told Jessica the story. Was it the same night? AND HOW DID ENDICOTT’S BODY END UP IN ESTONIA?!? I WANT MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THAT NIGHT. 
3:54 - “Ainsley and I came back from the hospital after Gil’s stabbing.”....we never saw Ainsley at the hospital. Was she there and left before Malcolm got there? Or is this a plot hole I need to ignore?
4:05 - The way that the flashbacks of Endicott’s murder is spliced into this scene with Malcolm’s cover story is so perfectly executed. It’s so captivating and so so well done.
4:14 - Malcolm’s eyes look quite manic during the retelling of this story. Poor guy is desperate to have everyone believe the story. Poor guy probably wants to convince himself that the story is true. 
4:16 - Wait. What? Ainsley has always been clumsy? .....interesting. I’ve seen no evidence of it but I’ll believe it for the sake of the plot. 
4:23 - “At least one of you has a soul.” Holy shit.  hahaha Hans is brutal. I love him so much. I also love how this line makes me, as a viewer, think “does that mean the writers want me to think that Ainsley doesn’t have a soul?” ...or more likely that she doesn’t feel emotion (which can be interpreted as a lack of a soul). That she’s a psychopath like Martin?
4:27 - OMG. Jessica loves Hans. He speaks to her dramatic rich woman soul. So entertaining. 
4:30 - Poor. Malcolm. This boy is always in some sort of emotional turmoil. For once I wish he was happy (but also I love the emotional whump so if that could continue that would be great). 
4:44 - “It’s so much more than that.” *chef’s kiss* comedic genius.  I would watch a whole episode of Mr.David making fun of Martin. But can we all just take a minute to appreciate that Martin doesn’t seem bothered at all that Mr.David is basically verbally telling him that he sucks? It’s almost like Martin thinks they’re friends?
4:50 - Martin is strangely chill talking to Mr.David in this scene. It’s a little off-putting. He almost seems normal. He’s not putting on his usual theatrics or ranting about doctor stuff. It makes you wonder how many different sides of Martin that Mr.David has witnessed. 
5:01 - “Oh no. Not Jerry.” LMAO. HOLY SHIT. Michael Sheen needs an Emmy. His delivery of that line might be the funniest thing this show has ever given us. hahahahaha
5:29 - Damn. This is not Gil’s month. First Jessica dumps him. Then he has to deal with Martin Whitly in the flesh. That plus the on-going drama of worrying about Malcolm’s mental health and the stress of reintegrating into work after a STAB WOUND.
5:31 - Gil’s face. hahahahaha he’s like, “Kill me. This can’t be happening. I hate everything. I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole.”
5:37 - “Yeah. Why’d you do it?” GIL. OMG. I’m so proud of Gil for dissing Martin to his face. BUT ALSO I worry that that’s going to give Martin more of a reason to hate Gil. I’m genuinely scared that the writers have Martin escaping as the pre-finale episode and Martin trying to kill Gil as the finale. Maybe Gil shows up trying to save Malcolm, AInsley, and Jessica (whom Martin is trying to abduct or hurt or something) idk I just feel like it’s going to be a likely subplot somewhere. I don’t want an attempt on Gil’s life to become a season finale tradition. 
5:56 - Ew. “Gilly” That is a terrible nickname. I think I threw up a little. 
6:00 - Damn. I love this scene. I could watch Martin and Gil pretending to be civil to each other for years. So entertaining. 
6:29 - hahahahaha OMG. Gil’s reaction to Martin saying, “Thank you” PLUS Edrisa’s sudden excitement at realizing she’s 10 ft away from Malcolm’s Dad - a medical legend, is magical.
6:35 - Not gonna lie. When Edrisa said, “Ok. I’m gonna play it cool.” I had to pause my TV and walk away to calm down. I was experiencing a mixture of second hand embarrassment for Edrisa’s inevitable behaviour, excitement for what is to come, and fear that Martin would be a jerk to our precious Edrisa. 
6:44 - Edrisa and Martin interacting was everything I’d hoped. It was strange, funny, sweet, and disturbing at the same time. The sweet, eccentric girl who attends cuddle parties is getting buddy-buddy with a literal serial killer. Hilarious. Even better is Gil’s background reactions as he desperately tries to keep Edrisa away from the psychopath. hahaha <3 
7:12 - Gil is currently living in a nightmare. hahahahaha 
7:47 - I love this. I love how Malcolm and Ainsley interact. Malcolm is such a good big brother. IDK something about these two adult siblings chilling on a couch and warning each other about Mom’s current rampage reminds me of myself and my younger brother. <3 Warms my cold dead heart. <3 PLUS has anyone else noticed that (as long as Ainsley isn’t hounding Malcolm about a story or airing out his mental health diagnoses like the bs from Q&A) Malcolm is extremely calm around Ainsley. Like maybe the calmest we’ve ever seen him?
8:20 - “Oh Ainsley, that’s a horrible idea.” This is adorable. Malcolm is totally acting like Ainsley’s surrogate dad. He’s trying so hard to protect her. <3 
8:42 - There’s something about the way that Malcolm says, “Hey Gil” that makes my heart swell. Idk why. I just their father/son relationship. So much. And it makes me so happy to see Malcolm having semi-normal interactions with people in general. 
8:48 - This. Is. The. Funniest. Episode. Of. Prodigal. Son. To. Date. Holy shit. The comical dread on Malcolm’s face. Martin’s glee on the phone. Gil’s general “done with life” body language. Ainsley’s utter joy at her luck. MALCOLM DRAINING THE ALKA-SELTZER. Ainsley saying “chug chug”. So perfect. 
9:27 - Is it just me or has Jessica been showing way more concern for her children’s well-being this season? At first I thought it was because she was so happy with Gil....but that’s not a thing anymore (because Jessica is a MORON - seriously if this show gets cancelled before Gil and Jessica are living happily ever after I will riot) so now Idk. 
10:02 - EDRISA WHY DID YOU NOT TELL GIL AND MALCOLM THAT THE SURGEON WAS ON THE PHONE?!? For a hot second, poor Malcolm looks like he thinks he’s hallucinating. 
10:40 - Gil hanging up on Martin and then telling Edrisa that she needs to make new friends is everything. It’s vicious. Gil looks absolutely furious in this scene and I love it. 
11:07 - Yo. Edrisa’s got some baggage. hahaha Malcolm looks soooo uncomfortable with her outburst.
11:18 - I would pay good money to watch Martin and Gil have a pissing match in front of Malcolm every episode. It’s amazing. They’re constantly trying to one-up each other. The tension is palatable. And someone Malcolm is the only one acting like a mature, working adult. Malcolm. My mentally unstable, skinny millennial. 
11:34 - OH SHIT. Martin did not just bring Jessica into this. Oh SNAP. Does Martin know that Jessica dumped Gil?!? 
11:56 - “I’m going to need a little more than that.” Damn. Malcolm looks pissed here. Pretty sure he hates that Martin just brought up Gil/Jessica. Malcolm’s bio-dad and real dad are fighting and it’s very clear that Malcolm is on Gil’s side.
12:17 - The look that Gil and Malcolm share here is perfect. I love it so much. You can see how annoyed they both are, how much they hate that they need Martin on this case, how much neither of them want Martin’s help. <3 
12:23 - SOMEONE GIVE GIL A MEDAL. This man just grit his teeth, smiled, and let MARTIN WHITLY - the man who tried to KILL HIM work on his case. Why? Because Malcolm silently asked him to. Because Gil loves Malcolm and knows that it’s better for Martin to work with them officially than for Malcolm to work with Martin in secret. At least this way he can look out for Malcolm. 
12:42 - “It’s taken Dr. Marsh years...” soooo was Dr. Marsh the name of the Asian doctor leading group therapy last season? Is this just a new actor, same character scenario? OR am I supposed to forget that Asian doctor existed last season? 
13:04 - I can’t tell if Gil hates this whole “father-son in group therapy idea”. He looks kind of like he hates it (although he is looking at Martin in the shot). I’m inclined to think that Gil is worried. He doesn’t like how nice Martin is acting toward Malcolm. He doesn’t want Malcolm to get hurt again. BUT I also think there’s probably a part of Gil that thinks group therapy might be beneficial for Malcolm’s mental health? I mean it was only ever going to be terrible or amazing. Nothing in between. 
13:12 - “They hate you don’t they?” GIL BRINGING THE FIRE. hahahaha angry Gil is really funny.
13:43 - OH HELL YES. More Hector. <3
13:46 - hahaha YES. Hector this is Malcolm - the son. You know, the one you had to role-play? hahaha I feel like Hector is a really cool dude (aside from the murder). 
13:53 - Damn. Hector pays attention in group. He has a lot of info about Malcolm. I would’ve thought the other inmates would just tune Martin out when he starts his monologues. 
13:59 - “He’s got a thing with hands?” hahahaha OMG. How did I never connect the hand thing. DOES Malcolm have a thing with hands? ....I kind of want that to be cannon?
14:00 - “You’re crazier than me.”  Ouch. That must’ve hurt. Think about it - Malcolm is ridden with guilt about Endicott. He’s haunted by what he experienced as a kid and by what his father is. Malcolm believes he’s broken beyond repair. On some level Malcolm thinks he’s crazy. Now a literal killer just told him he’s crazy. That just affirms what Malcolm already believes about himself. :( PLUS right after Hector tells Malcolm that he’s crazy - the camera pans to Martin. MARTIN looks scared. Martin is losing control of the situation and he doesn’t like it. Martin knows on some level that he ruined Malcolm’s mental health. He almost looks a little guilty?
14:31 - FINALLY. We have a cannon occurrence of someone calling Malcolm “Mal” (or “Malc” if you’re going by HULU’s subtitles?). I hope the writers start having people call Malcolm by Mal/Malc more often. 
14:35 - I can’t ignore it anymore.  DID HECTOR HAVE THAT SCAR ON HIS FACE LAST SEASON?!? I DON’T REMEMBER IT. 
14:38 - YES YES. Malcolm looks angry. I LOVE IT. Scream at him Malcolm! Give him hell!
15:03 - Yikes. Malcolm sounds like he’s about to cry here. :( My heart breaks for him. .....I wonder if this is the first time Martin has ever heard how much pain he caused Malcolm straight from Malcolm? Martin looks hella uncomfortable here. 
15:25 - The inmates (literal murderers) empathizing with Malcolm is twisted, beautiful, and haunting. These guys understand how much it sucks to hang out with Martin. These guys can see the real pain in Malcolm’s expression. They know he isn’t lying. Part of me honestly wonders if one of them is going to try and hurt Martin for Malcolm. They looked pissed enough by the end of the conversation that I kind of believe they might. 
16:00 - Malcolm is not acting here. For once he’s not projecting his problems onto potential suspects. He’s just venting to suspects. No pretence. I love it. BUT 100% of me wants to know where Gil is during this session. Is Gil listening? Is the session being recorded for evidence? There’s no way Gil (or Dani) wouldn’t confront Malcolm about this. Even if they just asked him if he’s okay. 
16:10 - hahahaha look at Doctor Marsh. He’s like “ooookkkkkaaaayyyy. I’m a psychiatrist in a psychiatric facility for people who have committed violent crimes. BUT THIS IS THE NUTTIEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN.”
16:12 - Look at the way Martin narrows his eyes. He’s trying to figure out if Malcolm is acting. He’s finally realizing that Malcolm truly hates what Martin subjected him to as a child. I honestly think this interaction will cause Martin to shift his “become a murderer like me” agenda from Malcolm to Ainsley. He’s finally seen the depth of Malcolm’s hatred and pain and knows deep down that Malcolm will never turn into a serial killer. But there’s still hope for Ainsley. That’s not to say that Martin won’t stop gaslighting Malcolm - he totally will.
17:10 - Martin has been at Claremont for 20 YEARS. How is it that he didn’t know a gold card existed?!?
17:21 - I honestly thought Marsh was going to get shanked. For the gold card. No other reason. 
18:07 - It’s not supposed to be funny but Burt freaking out and punching Marsh is HYSTERICAL. hahahahaha
18:10 - That guard who pushed Malcolm out of the room and into a safe area? He’s in my good books. Every time I watch him push Malcolm to safety I want to give him a hug. Just for doing his job. What the hell is wrong with me?!?
18:18 - UGH. I hate that creepy, satisfied look that Martin gives Malcolm. It’s the same look he gave baby Malcolm in the pilot. It’s the “we’re the same” look and it clearly bothers Malcolm. :( 
18:26 - Oh look. 18 minutes into the episode and we finally have a Dani appearance!! annnnnnd no mention of JT. I mean, I get it. He’s on paternity leave. I’m happy for him. BUT TWO EPISODES WITHOUT A JT APPEARANCE IS TORTURE. At least give me a throw away line about how happy JT is or about the baby!?? Honestly - it’s my biggest gripe with this episode. 
18:56 - soooo either Dr. Marsh is a terrible psychiatrist OR you can’t “cure” murderers. 
19:08 - The NYPD knows that Martin cured Jerry?!? HOW? Did Mr. David get Martin to admit to shocking him? Did Mr. David tell the police?!? I don’t remember Martin telling Malcolm. I specifically remember Malcolm saying, “I don’t want to know”
20:02 - Damn. I want Ainsley to go dark so badly. I want to see how badly it would destroy Malcolm and Jessica. I am evil. 
20:52 - Malcolm’s burgundy jacket is gorgeous. That is all.
21:10 - Malcolm knows that Martin wants to escape. This is good. I love this. 
21:55 - THERE’S A WOMENS WARD?!? REVOLUTIONARY INFORMATION. I THOUGHT THEY HAD A SEPARATE HOSPITAL. 
22:00 - Oh wow. Finally - a perk to gender inequality. 
22:52 - This Brightwell scene is so cute. I love watching Malcolm be excited about solving the crime. I love watching Dani gently tease him about how weird he is. I love watching them subtly flirt. Is Malcolm ready for another relationship - hell no. Do I think Dani has forgiven him - not totally. If they got together now it would end badly. But I do want them to be endgame. 
23:11 - Andre is really suspicious throughout this whole scene. I’m convinced that if Dani and Malcolm weren’t too busy flirting Andre would’ve become a suspect really fast. 
23:15 - Why do people get released from psychiatric prisons?!? This is a genuine question. I would’ve thought that everyone in Claremont has committed some seriously heinous crimes and only a very small portion of them are actually sick. The rest of them just pleaded insanity and had good lawyers. But even if they are/were sick. I don’t think the types of mental illnesses that drive people to murder and/or rape is something that can be cured.  Sooo why are they getting released? I guess I just wonder because there’s this guy that’s been in my local news on and off for like 10+ years. He’s molested/raped many young women between the ages of about 16-25. He’s been arrested and released multiple times. He keeps getting released to different major cities in my province (usually a city with a big University) and reoffends within 6 months of being released. Most recently he was arrested last month after being released in October 2020. Clearly he’s going to keep reoffending - so why does he keep getting released? I guess I just don’t understand what the criteria are that allow an inmate who has committed that sort of crime to be released. Here’s a link to one of the more recent news stories if you’re interested: https://vancouverisland.ctvnews.ca/police-warn-of-high-risk-sex-offender-moving-to-victoria-1.5149264
23:23 - hahaha Andre is like, “Yo. This dude is freaky.”
24:15 - Look at how proud Malcolm is of his whole “lobster = murderer” profile. <3 So freaking precious. <3 and Dani looks so amused with him.  <3
24:37 - Sooooo Mr. David isn’t listening to this conversation? He left the room?
24:40 - Jessica going to Martin for parenting help is terrifying. This is a woman in crisis. 
25:20 - But Jessica was right to be paranoid in 97′. She wasn’t being cheated on romantically but her husband was murdering people. 
25:24 - Martin is so selling his kids out here. He knows it. He doesn’t care. He’s having too much fun torturing Jessica. He’s rejoicing at the fact that he gets to play the “I turned the kids to the dark side” card. 
26:40 - Poor Jessica. She looks suspicious and scared. Scared that she raised a killer even though she tried desperately to prevent that very behaviour. 
26:56 - Damn. Martin is having a really good day. First he gets to annoy Gil Arroyo in the flesh. Then Edrisa talks medical with him. Then he gets to work with Malcolm. THEN his ex-wife calls him and he gets to toy with her mind. THEN his daughter, who has literally murdered someone comes to visit him. He is a proud Dad right here and he’s having an amazing day. 
28:00 - Rhonda is terrifying. This girl has perfected the “I’m sweet and unthreatening” while lying and manipulating people. I swear she’s a teenage Queen B personality with a side of violence. 
28:30 - I love how protective Malcolm is of Ainsley. Look how positively livid he is that Marin is talking to her. Malcolm is terrified that Martin is going to purposefully and successfully turn Ainsley into a serial killer. Malcolm doesn’t want to lose his sister. He doesn’t want Jessica to lose her ‘stable’ child.
29:09 - This scares me. This is the kind of Ainsley behaviour from last season that made me believe she is the Whitly child most like Martin. Her ruthlessness and lack of a conscience when it comes to looking for a news story is extremely upsetting. 
30:11 - What the hell happened to Tevin? AND WATKINS?!? We got no closure on those guys. Are they dead? In prison? Is Tevin still in Claremont? Were they transferred to facilities outside of New York State?
30:28 - Malcolm yelling at Martin is perfect. *chef’s kiss* Finally this boy is being honest with his father and he isn’t holding back. 
30:40 - Michael Sheen is an incredible actor. This is an Emmy worthy scene. By Sheen AND Payne.
30:48 - I love how you can see Mr. David just chilling. Sitting outside the door and staring across the hall during this scene. It’s just....can’t he hear the screaming?!? Is he just like, “I can’t take anymore of this today. Not my circus and not my monkeys.”
30:55 - Soooooo this is Martin showing his true colours. There’s definitely a part of Martin that hates Malcolm. I honestly wonder if that part of Martin actively tries/tried to emotionally torture Malcolm now and throughout his childhood. 
31:00 - “And your mother. And you ruined HeR!!!”....does this mean Martin was trying to make Ainsley a serial killer? Maybe after the camping trip when he realized Malcolm was too “weak” to kill anyone? Is this Martin saying that Ainsley is ruined because she didn’t become a serial killer? Or that Ainsley is ruined because she killed Endicott?
31:05 - “But that’s not me.” hahaha OMG. Michael Sheen just flipped between two personalities like nobody’s business. Respect.
31:08 - Martin’s outburst hurt Malcolm. Badly. You can see it all over his face. Even now, when Malcolm is being strong and showing some backbone to Martin, Martin can wound Malcolm with a single phrase. :( 
31:41 - soooo where has Gil been for the past 10 minutes of this episode?
32:02 - Sooooo did Andre kill Jerry for Rhonda? Or did he just know about the murder and keep quiet for Rhonda? Or is his oblivious to the fact that Rhonda killed Jerry? I’m honestly confused here. 
32:20 - Holy shit. Rhonda is crazy. Andre is dead now. Right?
32:48 - Wait. Why did Andre have a gold card? Mr. David only has red. What kind of qualifications does a guard need to get a gold card vs blue, green, or red?!?!
32:55 - Claremont isn’t a punishment for Martin. Solitary is. Martin should live in solitary. He deserves to suffer for his crimes (and the ongoing torture of his son). 
33:05 - How messed up is it that Mr. David’s job is to protect a serial killer? I don’t think I’m brave enough to do something like that. I also don’t know if I could do that for moral reasons. 
33:14 - Damn. That elevator looks like it hasn’t been cleaned since it was installed. It’s sooo much nastier than the hallway outside of the elevator. 
33:50 - Sooo does this mean Martin is eventually going to try and murder someone down here?
33:54 - HE CALLED FOR BACKUP <3 <3 <3 OUR BOY IS GROWING UP AND I’M SO PROUD. <3 
35:40 - FINALLY SOME MALCOLM WHUMP. <3 THIS SEASON HAS BEEN LACKING IT. 
36:00 - This is really interesting to me. I honestly wonder if Martin has some sort of split personality disorder (personality #1: murderous, selfish, psychopath; personality #2: loving, concerned father and lawful doctor). You can see how desperately he wants to escape. But also how much he loves his son. I honestly thought he was going to leave Malcolm to die. 
36:06 - Ugh. Look at his whumped face. <3 <3 <3 ....one thing that I couldn’t stop thinking during all the tazing (which was amazing FYI, I’m not complaining) is this: in QxA (1x07) Mr. David says that he only has a single shot tazer. Why did Andre have a multi-shot tazer? Is this a gold card vs red card thing?
36:40 - WHY THE EFF DOES BACKUP NOT INCLUDE GIL?!?! I KNOW HE’S STILL IN THE BUILDING. 
37:03 - MARTIN, IF YOU TOUCH A HAIR ON DANI’S HEAD I WILL PERSONALLY HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU MYSELF. He honestly looks like he wants to murder her. 
37:50 - Martin’s speech is not going to help Malcolm’s mental state. At all. 
38:31 - No. No. No. Martin you do NOT get to talk to Dani on a first name basis. Look at how much Dani hates it. 
38:35 - I love how soft Malcolm looks as Martin lifts him up. Look at how Malcolm gently leans into the touch. It breaks my heart. After 20 years Malcolm is still comforted by physical contact with his father. :( 
38:37 - “Put your hands on me again Dr. Whitly, and I’ll blow your head off.” OH HELL YES. Dani is my hero. Iconic. Also - anyone else notice that Dani is chewing gum in this scene (I don’t think she’s chewed gum on camera since the pilot?) it makes her look like so much more of a badass in this scene. 
38:55 - Oh look. The rest of the backup finally showed up. Where were these assholes 5 minutes ago when DANI WAS ALONE? AND WHERE IS GIL?!?!
39:00 - Malcolm thanking Dani is so so precious. And the fact that he’s clearly struggling to breathe and stay conscious is giving me life. ALSO Dani saying, “YOU’re welcome.”?!? *chef’s kiss* :) :) <3
39:30 - So Malcolm definitely knows that Martin almost left him to die so that Martin could escape. 
39:33 - ......Ainsley is currently living with Jessica. Why is Ainsley not at the family dinner? We literally see her in the house in like 30 seconds. 
39:35 - Malcolm in a polo shirt. Malcolm in a polo shirt. Why is it so attractive?!? He looks like a baby cinnamon roll? <3 
39:51 - WHO THE EFF LET AINSLEY INTO THE MURDER BASEMENT?!? WHY AM I EXPECTED TO BELIEVE THAT JESSICA DIDN’T RE-SEAL IT AFTER WATKINS?!?!
40:15 - Jessica desperately tearing apart the living room is heartbreaking. :(
40:29 - Question: Did Jessica send her staff home before she tore apart the living room? Because I can just imagine two of them staring into the living room from the hall like, “She’s finally snapped. Should we call someone?”
41:00 - Jessica is the queen of drama. HOLY SHIT. This reveal was so extra and so perfect. 
41:13 - “I killed him.” “You’re lying.” I love this interaction between Jessica and Malcolm. Malcolm has spent his whole life trying to convince people that he’s not a murderer. To protect Ainsley, his baby sister, he will say the words “I killed him”. Even though that is literally killing a part of Malcolm. Jessica knows it. I love that Jessica can see that Malcolm is lying. She’s not trying to convince herself that he’s innocent. She literally just accused him of murder. She’s scared. Because Malcolm just admitted to killing someone - his biggest fear - and it was a lie. 
41:35 - Watching Bellamy Young’s facial expression as Jessica realizes that Ainsley killed Endicott is a thing of beauty. This woman needs an Emmy too. HELL, CAN WE GIVE THIS WHOLE EPISODE AN EMMY?!?! 
42:00 - Poor Jessica. The guilt she must feel. She’s always thought that Malcolm was the one at risk of being a murderer. He’s a boy (they’re statistically more prone to violence than girls), he was older than Ainsley, he remembers terrible things, Malcolm had continued exposure to Martin throughout his childhood (Ainsley didn’t - I think?). But the child she neglected, the child she thought was safe, the child she thought remained free of Martin’s evil killed someone. It’s a plot-twist that just ripped Jessica’s heart into a million pieces. 
42:30 - Yep. I promise you Malcolm has been psychoanalyzing Ainsley’s past behaviours since the moment she killed Endicott. He’s found traits common to serial killers and he’s terrified that she’ll become one if she remembers what it felt like to kill Endicott. He’s probably kicking himself for not noticing sooner. He’s probably questioning his ability as a profiler and as a big brother. AND the fact that MALCOLM has to protect Jessica AND Ainsley is heartbreaking. It’s way too big a burden. No wonder Malcolm’s mental health is on a downward spiral. 
42:33 - This is the moment Jessica begins grieving for Ainsley. The fear, disbelief, and horror on her face. It’s torture that I can only describe as someone telling a mother that her daughter is dead. Because Ainsley is dead. The person Jessica believed Ainsley was - that little girl is dead. Because Jess just found out the truth. 
42:55 - Jessica is now terrified of her own daughter. That is maybe the most upsetting thing this show has given us. 
43:00 - I saw an interesting theory about how Ainsley is regressing back to her childhood (crawling into bed with Mom, moving back in with Mom) and I must say - that would be a really interesting way for this story to go. Ainsley regressing to a child-like state as she is convicted of murder. As a result she ends up in the women’s ward of Claremont because she can plead insanity. 
This episode was amazing. Seriously, one of the best Prodigal Son episodes to date. Definitely the best of season 2 so far. If you’ve read this far - thanks for hanging out. 
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anunvalidcritic · 4 years ago
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Justice League: Snyder Cut
(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.)
Oh, the time has come my friends! Now, I originally did a review on Batman V.S. Superman and I didn’t care for it, so I deleted it. But before I start, I would like y’all to read this statement made by @verified-villain-fxcker - You can click HERE to read it. As I stated in my repost, I couldn’t have said it better. May Autumn Snyder continue to rest in peace. Let’s get started!
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It’s been so long since I’ve made a post I can’t even remember how I do this LOL.
CLARK is outta there to say the least...
WONDER WOMAN and LOIS look flabbergasted, as they should... BRUCE as well.
Talk about a shock-wave scream 
All jokes aside, the hate that LEX has towards SUPERMAN is just to much energy to be giving to another person..
THESE BITCHIES ARE READY
why are they letting a minority approach the fucking the cube?!?!
*insert travel montage scene here*
                      Part 1 - “Don’t count on it, Batman.”
BRUCE knows damn well he’s talking to AQUAMAN. Let’s move this shit along lol
“Oh Gotham? How’s that shit hole?” - AQUAMAN
Ik these bitchies aren’t singing rofl
I’d sniff anything wore by Jason Momoa too.
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“Maybe a man who broods in a cave isn’t cut out to be a recruiter.” - ALFRED
TALK YO SHIT ALFRED!!!!
AMY ADAMS can literally take my heart, step on it, throw it in a river and I still wouldn’t be mad. 
Here comes the lovely WONDER WOMAN!
broooo her hands were moving like Donnie Yen in Ip Man!
Fucked that entire ceiling up
Ofc the one who tried to touch it would make the stupid statement. 
STEPPENWOLF is really wildin’ out
Don’t look back! I hate it when they look back!!
These are some strong as women!
                             PART 2 - “The Age of Heroes”
“It’s toxic, that’s good.” - STEPPENWOLF
I can only imagine that this is how toxic people think. 
this dude really just threw that lil demon fella like it was nothin’ lmao
You know you're working at a job for too long when you say this is the first time in a while that they're going home early smdh
Now that shit was pretty lit....
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SILAS thinkin’ shit I better check on my son. 
“You know a lot about monsters, don’t you? Especially how to make them.” - CYBORG
If that isn’t teen angst, then I don’t know wtf is lmao
Seeing Gal in this tomb makes me want to re-watch Wonder Woman 1 all over again!
DARKSEID ol’ trifflin’ ass
plopped him down like he was dirty laundry
God bless Willem Dafoe, this man is a fuckin’ legend!
“This world is divided. They’re a primitive species. Unevolved and at war with one another. Too separate to be one.” - STEPPENWOLF
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DeSaad kinda looks like Doctor Doom in the Fantasic Four reboot lmao
GREEN LATERNS!!!!!!!!!!!! OH SHIT!!!!!!!!
we really need a Green Lantern Corps moving...
ZEUS + ARES = A Dynamic Duo When They Aren’t Being Dicks To Each Other
You know I feel bad for man because all they did was bury that shit in the ground rofl
                  Part 3 - “Beloved Mother, Beloved Son”
BARRY + IRIS = Love at First Sight 
The burger can’t be that good like damn. 
Bro the detail on his fucking shoes and the glass!!
ROFL PLEASE TELL ME HE TOOK THE HOTDOG FOR HIS DOG!?!? 
damn did the car really need to explode...
lol BARRY must really need the job lol
... I would’ve just played dead after he threw me against that rock...
Man of Steel probably has one of the best soundtracks not just for a superhero movie but just in general
Americans love their football!
I have this love-hate relationship with CYBORG being in the JL and not with the TITANS you know since he’s a kid, but he’s a college student in this one. 
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Thank God DIANA spoke with VICTOR instead of BRUCE because I honestly don’t think he would’ve gotten him on board.
Everyone can literally zigzag zoom across this planet at undeniable speed except for BATMAN lol
Come on, VIC, help the lady out.
You know honestly, BARRY has a pretty cool pad for someone who's trying to get by paying for a Criminal Justice Degree. 
“A very attractive Jewish boy. Who drinks milk, I don’t drink milk.” - BARRY
“Fuck the World.” - CYBORG
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dang Ik DIANA has every right to grieve over STEVE, but damn that man has her whipped!
“You’re looking at the hottest thing on Earth. The exact same thing I said to my prom date. She dumped me anyway.” - RYAN CHOI
Why does MERA have an accent in this but not in AQUAMAN?? (ik the answer)
DAAAYYUUUMMMN MERA TURNED INTO A WHOLE BLOOD BENDER!
                               PART 4 - “Change Machine”
CYBORG just glided over silently
STEPPENWOLF + WONDER WOMAN = EPIC FIGHT SCENE
Seeing BARRY move like that to stop the debris and to ping DIANA’S sword really is amazing..
But he should not be screaming like that LOL
How do you not remember the planet that’s habitants almost killed you?? Because if that was me, I wouldn’t have forgotten that shit at all!
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 Would've held a big ass grudge until I could go back. 
“I know we’re all thinking the same thing right now. Who’s gonna say it? I’m not gonna say it.” - BARRY
WOOOAAHHH J’ONN JONES?! (forgot about that)
 “There are six, not five. There is no us without him.” - BRUCE
Damn, no faith at all 
                         PART 5 - “ALL The King’s Horses”
ICONIC DIALOGUE
BARRY - “Wonder Woman. What do you think, man? You think she’d go for a younger guy?”
VICTOR - “She’s 5,000 years old, Barry. Every guy is a younger guy.”
I would’ve kept swippin’ that ID like a cashier at Wal-Mart swippin’ a debit card.
They're movin’ a little too slow for me. Ik they’ve never been on the ship before, but I would’ve been zoomin’ through that entire ship just to hurry and get the job done. 
NOT THE PREGNANCY TEST
Damn, they couldn’t have at least picked up the photo??
The foreshadowing was spectacular! It will always amaze me. 
I’m sure Allstate will cover that person’s car...
Just when LOIS was about to move on. 
CLARK grabbed DIANA like miss me with that Rafiki shit.
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I would’ve come back to my senses too after looking at Amy Adams. 
AQUAMAN + THE FLASH = A CONUNDRUM
DR. SILAS takin’ one for the team
                              PART 6 - “Something Darker”
As crazy as radiation is, it’s quite an amazing spectacle.
I wish this Justice League movie could’ve held off until we got some other heroes such as the Green Lanterns, Hawkgirl, and many others. 
Our generation was truly blessed to have an incredible actor as SUPERMAN, and we are not putting him to use!
JONATHAN sounds like President Biden lol
Alright, team?! Break!
AQUAMAN is totally enjoying this fight. He rode that Parademon like a surfboard.
AQUAMAN + CYBORG + FLASH = *THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN*
I swear every scene that WONDER WOMAN enters into does not fail to include the “Ancient Lamentation Music”. 
VICTOR hurry up and say “one” god damnnit!!
SUPERMAN COLD!!!!
Somebody needs to put this fight on WorldStar
BARRY = HE’S A RUNNA HE’S A TRACK STAHHHHARRR!!!
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THAT WAS FUCKING IMMACULATE
The Unity  = The Three Bitchies
I bet DARKSEID will remember that shit now
                        EPILOGUE - “A Father Twice Over”
VICTOR = A Final Requiem
LOL VULKO and MERA look stressed tf out!
“Uh, I have too much to live for. And more important things to do.” - LEX
A cocky motherfucker LMAO
Alright, we’re back in this type of dream sequence. 
“Who have you ever loved?” - MERA
Uh, bitch his parents, Robin tf?!
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Thank you, JOKER, for stating the facts for Ms. Fish-stick
 Oh shit, they let LOIS die, goddamn it!
HARLEY’S DEAD TOO?!?!?!
BRUCE LOOK SICK AF!!!
Well, the dream is over once again...
I just don’t see how people can live with all those fuckin’ windows. 
“Oh, and some have called me The Martian Manhunter.” - J’ONN
Alright...
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Yes, the movie was long but what needed to be expressed was. As we already the Snyder Cut wasn’t supposed to be seen because a father simply wanted to grieve the death of his child. I’ll once again reiterate what @verified-villain-fxcker you don't have to like the film but at least give it the benefit of the doubt from its predecessor. For me, I did enjoy watching his version, but let’s be honest what he who shall not be named did was just fucked up. 
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