#it's a pretty lighthearted idea regardless

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

I don't know if I want to write a mini-series about Stray Kids as American football players or if I just want to focus it around one member. Hmm.

[lovemikage]

𝘽𝙀𝘿 𝘾𝙃𝙀𝙈 : 𝙢𝙚𝙜𝙪𝙧𝙪 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙖 𝙭 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 ( 𝙛𝙩. 𝙞𝙨𝙖𝙜𝙞 )

summary: you confess to your boyfriend bachira you think his best friend isagi is cute. he decides to do some meddling of his own. wc: 1.4k warnings: fem!reader, dub-conish (reader isn't aware isagi is there oops), humiliation, praise, gratuitous dialogue a/n: hello hello beautiful people ! this is my submission for @ficsforgaza 's kinktober event, with the prompt bachira & humiliation ! please check out the other writers + fics if they tickle your fancy. i have not written smut like this in ... a year, i think, so please be gentle with me. hope you love it, please comment & rb if you do ! credit to @/cafekitsune for the beautiful mdni divider !

" he feels the same, you know. i don’t know why you were so secretive. "

your eyes, previously squeezed shut, fly open, and every muscle that had been turned into jelly from your recent orgasm tenses up immediately. you shift with the intention to move away from your boyfriend, but it’s in vain – bachira’s large palm and long fingers splay against your pelvis, pushing you down into the bed. it doesn’t hurt, nothing with bachira ever does, but it’s insistent in the same way his fingers circling your clit are. 

" what do you – ah! – m-meguru, what do you m-mean? " you know what he means, you’re unsure why you’re asking. bachira doesn’t mind, though, he always loves to tell a story. 

“ well – " his tone is sing-song, sickly sweet, and it’s clear he’s having way more fun than he should be ( than you think he should be, anyway ). a lithe finger pushes its way through your folds to slip inside of you, and your hips buck at the same time you whine – too much, not yet, still sensitive. he won’t listen, “ remember that one time you told me ‘sagi was cute? then played it off like you were joking? you were right, by the way, so don’t think i’m mad, promise i’m not. but it got me thinking – "

one finger turns to two and the burn makes you squeeze your eyes shut again. it’s nothing compared to the stretch of his cock, but enough to make you just that little bit uncomfortable. it doesn’t help that you’re so on edge, “ bachira – "

“ shhhhh. anyway, it got me thinking, you know? he’d never admit it ‘cause he’s my best friend, but i know he thinks you’re cute. " the look you give him has his head shaking, “ don’t talk! i’m not done – i remembered, when we first met you he called dibs. you liked me more – obviously – so that didn’t matter, just a funny joke after the fact. regardless, i had the idea to … well, i was eavesdropping on you the other day – "

an indignant sound leaves you and you squirm more; bachira sighs, lets his golden eyes flick down to your ankle, pretty pink panties dangling from them. quickly he pauses, uses the hand on your hips to pick it up. you whimper, both from the loss of movement inside of you and because you know what he’s about to do, you’ve had enough sex throughout the course of your relationship ( more than normal, according to your friends ). you’re proved right when he taps the side of your cheek, prompting you to open up – you do, ever-obedient, despite the red-hot humiliation burning in your cheeks. cotton presses between your lips and fills your mouth, your whine becomes muffled. bachira beams, “ there we go. always so good for me, hm? “ another pat to your cheek. your eyes start to water – you feel like a prized showdog or something. 

“ much better. " you fight the urge to roll your eyes; it doesn’t last long because bachira’s back to hovering next to you, his shadow imposing. you feel vulnerable, exposed and open for whatever he wants to do. right now, it seems like all he wants to do is make you cum in the most embarrassing way possible. he scissors his fingers and grins when you cry out, big and goofy and too lighthearted for what he’s talking about, “ back to what i was saying – i was eavesdropping on you and your friends the other night. sue me, i’m curious. heard you talking about him – agreeing when one of them said he’s hot, you know, stuff like that. kept it in the back of my mind for later. but then – yesterday, when i came home, i got here earlier than you thought i did. found you. ” 

your mind races in an attempt to figure out where your boyfriend is going with all of this. yesterday, yesterday – oh. oh my god. 

“ you’re so cute when you moan, you know? i know i always tell you, but i can’t help it. so pretty, just like – " bachira curls his fingers, lets them brush against that sweet, spongy spot inside of you that makes you see stars, eliciting a low, muffled moan, “ – that. you were doing that, saying my name, like always. i was just about ready to go in when i heard his, too. s’when i realized it was time. "

the tears previously welling up fall, now. big, fat droplets running down your face, taking your mascara with them and smearing the pretty makeup you’d done for your date tonight. you feel pathetic, like you’d been caught. it makes sense, now; you thought you had heard him come in before he announced himself, but it didn’t make sense, so you brushed it off. now you realize he had just gone back out and made a point of announcing his entrance the second time. you want to look away in embarrassment but bachira won’t let you, his fingers picking up their pace at the same time he grips your chin in his hand. combined with the panties stuffing your mouth, you can’t say what you want to – i’m sorry, i’m sorry, it doesn’t mean anything, i’m sorry. 

what’s worse is it all feels so good, bachira’s fingers pumping inside of you at an almost dizzying pace, thumb carefully circling your clit with just enough pressure to make all thoughts leave your head. you can feel your orgasm fast approaching, a knot in your tummy threatening to unravel. it always amazes you, how bachira knows just how to make you fall apart within seconds. he knows you inside and out, could take you apart and put you back together again. sometimes you think he’d probably like to. 

in your panicked state, though, you hadn’t realized what he said – it’s time. time for what?

wide, wet eyes, embarrassed and earnest all at once, meet bachira’s own – tender, loving, with that bit of mischief behind them. the eyes you love so much. 

as always, he seems to read your mind, and his soft, fond smile turns to another shit-eating grin. his fingers don’t stop their pace when he speaks again, “ thought i’d ask him to join us. you’d like that, wouldn’t you baby? oh – " his words break off into a moan, his collected exterior cracking if only for a moment. the way you clench around him tells him everything he needs to know. 

not like he’d just take that as an answer, though. 

“ she likes that, huh? pretty pussy needs two cocks to be satisfied. i know, i know, s’okay – we just need to make sure that you want it. i need to make sure you want it. don’t needa use your words, you know that. be good for me, baby, like you always are. ”

you break, then – you gush around the fingers digging deep inside of you, your eyes blown wide, glazed over from his sweet talk. all embarrassment melts away, your brain mush. while your legs shake and your hips buck you nod, almost wildly, whining and crying around the intrusion in your mouth while bachira fucks you through it all. you do want isagi here, you want them both, you want – everything, really. your hand grips his arm so hard you’re sure you’re leaving nail marks, pulling him close in what you can only describe as an attempt to make him a part of you. your bachira. 

“ fuck this. you’re an asshole, bachira. can’t believe you made me fucking watch. i’ll be there in ten. ”

you freeze, snapped out of subspace in an instant. you register a lot of things, then – how hard bachira is against your leg, cock thick and heavy and leaking; how that voice definitely belonged to isagi, irritated and gruff; and how bachira’s no longer grinning at you but at the laptop set up on his desk. the one you’d thought was off. 

“ don’t be mad. ” again, bachira knows you, which is why he says it the second the call drops. you’re too embarrassed to speak, just looking at him dumbfounded and still fucked out from your previous orgasms, “ and don’t try to clean up. he’ll be sad if it’s not messy. ”

you shut your eyes to try and push away the humiliation. there’s a pause from your boyfriend, and while you can’t see him, you can feel him slinking down the bed, making himself comfortable between your thighs. you crack an eye open to see him looking up at you, almost pleading, “ think you can give me one more? pleaseeeee. he’s gonna hog you when he gets here! ”

you can’t do much else but nod, accepting your fate. it was what you wanted, after all.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

FOOLISH SPRING WINDS, BLOW MY WAY ; SATORU GOJO

summary; a snippet of the spring you share with a certain satoru gojo — who seems intent on making your high school life as difficult as possible.

word count; 5.4k

contents; satoru gojo/reader, gn!reader, enemies to friends (..but the ’enemy’ part is kinda one-sided), fluffy n sweet overall, satoru doesn’t know how to make friends + thinks lighthearted bullying constitutes as a bonding activity, he’s a little shit but he means well, switching povs, lots of gojo slander (but reader sees the light eventually), big shoujo vibes, they’re both tsunderes <33

a/n; i ended up scrapping the series i wrote this fic for originally, so i thought i’d rewrite it and repost it on its own!! teentoru is such a grumpy little kitten i need to squish his paws

satoru gojo is annoying.

it might seem blunt, but after many weeks of careful thinking, you’ve decided no description could possibly fit him better. 

when you first met him, on that first day of school, you had no idea what to think. no real expressions or tonal shifts to clue you in on who he was, how he felt — nothing but the slightest peek of a terrifying blue to set your nerves on edge. 

in hindsight, you’re almost certain it was intentional. he wanted to appear unreadable. purposefully hiding his personality and mannerisms, to gain the upper hand — observing you, dissecting you inside his mind, while revealing nothing about himself apart from his surname. 

it’s a kind of power; a safety measure.

… but evidently, holding back isn’t exactly gojo’s forte. the very next morning, he was already beginning to loosen up, after getting more accustomed to the new environment and classmates. showing you his true colours; just a little hint of cerulean, a single dip of paint on the blank canvas of his soul.

and with the revelation of his genuine personality — your unease around him festered even more.

where could you even begin to describe him? for one, he’s childish. and cocky. and loud. arrogant, selfish and flamboyant — just generally an asshole? you could go on and on. none of the traits are particularly flattering, and you know he couldn’t care less.

gojo is annoying, plain and simple. almost constantly up to something, eager to push someone’s buttons, to get attention. like a bratty toddler. uninterested in manners, or even common courtesy; he says what he feels, regardless of how other people take it. 

to put it simply, he has no regard for the people around him. his self-interest is limitless. 

as if that wasn’t annoying enough — you have no choice but to admit that he does have a certain presence to him. a kind of charisma, or what you think could become charisma, if he’d just get off that high horse already. he won’t, though. you know he won’t. he revels in it, in looking down on everything and everyone, annoyingly boisterous and irritatingly tall. freaky, long limbs. like a noodle and an alien had a baby.

but, more than anything — above all else — what frustrates you most is the fact that his unbridled confidence isn’t exactly unwarranted.

as much as it pains you to say it… gojo is maybe just a little bit incredible. a natural-born genius. he’s intelligent, and observant, and awfully pretty, with those baby blues eyes and those snowy locks of hair. and he has no issue getting what he wants. 

absolutely zero. 

there’s something admirable about it, in a twisted way. like he doesn’t even need to try. he’s good at anything, if he just gives it a single chance. you can only assume he’s never given much thought to the prospect of being a decent guy, because that’s the only thing he sucks at.

effortlessly perfect, in the most imperfect of ways. that’s probably how you’d describe him.

… annoying is still the most fitting word, though. or maybe obnoxious. he’s got this spoiled rich kid vibe that irks you, gets under your skin. you doubt he’s ever had to empathize with anyone, in his entire life. 

and, yes — maybe you’re being a little harsh to him. but why should you bother being jovial when he won’t return the favour?

gojo is annoying; and when you say that, you mean annoying to basically everyone. as a basis for existing. always teasing and taunting, looking down from that high horse of his. you’re no exception to this rule, of course. but you’re almost certain that he has it out for you specifically.

you know he looks down on you, from behind those tacky sunglasses. you’re sure of it.

compared to geto or shoko, you aren’t very self-assured — and you think he must have sensed it the moment he laid eyes on you. sensed that you’re a little meek, a bit of a doormat, easy to push around and get a rise out of. maybe he also noticed your apprehension towards him, your apparent unease. 

you’re easy prey, to put it simply.

evidently, he’s developed a fondness for getting under your skin. it started as soon as introductions were over, and it still hasn’t gotten better. he loves catching you off guard, throwing you an unneeded comment or two, just to see what reaction you’ll give him next. almost like he’s solving an equation — said equation being you, the limit of your patience. and you keep giving him what he wants; a scoff, a roll of your eyes, an earnest fuck right off. you can never seem to successfully ignore him. he’s just far, far too good at being insufferable.

… and, more than anything, he’s far too out of reach. even when you try to get along with him, it backfires. you don’t have a single thing in common. you don’t understand him at all. 

(and that suits you just fine.)

a heavy sigh slips from your parted lips, as you examine your blurry reflection in the surface of the mirror. fatigue clings to your skin like a layer of sweat, your mind muddled, stuffed with anxious thoughts and discomforting feelings.

you’re exhausted. completely and utterly spent, even though the day’s barely begun — running on three pitiful hours of sleep, all broken up and jumbled by nightmares that wouldn’t stop spooking you. not a single wink of proper rest. 

and it’s painfully obvious. in your face, your posture, the dark crescents beneath your eyes; in the way you can’t help but drag your legs as you walk, your hair disheveled, little sighs and grumbles slipping from your lips for every step you take. all you can do is sluggishly blink the exhaustion away.

you just feel so tired.

it could be worse, though. you don’t have any classes today, no real reason to get out of your comfy bed, leave the safety of your cozy little dorm room. but you need breakfast, right now, or else you’ll literally explode — so you still get up on shaky legs and try to mimic the appearance of someone… even moderately well-rested.

it doesn’t work, but that’s besides the point. 

so you make your way to the dormitory’s shared kitchen. walking idly — clumsily — enjoying the sight of fleeting, fluttering cherry blossoms through the windows you pass. little pink butterflies.

once you’ve crossed the threshold, you’re relieved to find the open space entirely devoid of people. no shoko, no geto, not even a mischievous gojo. running into the first two wouldn’t be the end of the world — but it still wouldn’t be ideal. you don’t want anyone seeing you like this, tired and meek, a little vulnerable.

(least of all gojo. you shiver at the bare thought.)

with laboured, groggy movements, you waltz around the kitchen, getting cups and plates and turning on the coffee machine. enjoying the soothing melody of the pan sizzling, singing along to the purring of espresso being made. it’s nice and pleasant to your sensitive ears, as you blink under the rays of sunlight shining in, throwing together a lazy breakfast. 

you waste no time in taking a seat by one of the tables once you’re finished. eager to soak in the peace and quiet, wolf down a sandwich and copious amounts of caffeine.

but, as always — the world seems to have it out for you specifically.

”oh? well, look who it is. and here i thought you had left too.”

you stiffen. ever so slightly, barely noticeable, but still enough that you physically feel the dread envelop every single cell of your body. the voice that echoes out across the open air is a chipper one, a familiar one. a voice you were desperately hoping not to hear today. 

all you can do is continue to sip from your cup of coffee, inwardly wincing, silently going through all five stages of grief simultaneously — before accepting your unfortunate predicament. 

(that’s just your luck, isn’t it?)

finally, you raise your weary head, knowing exactly what sight you’ll be met with once you do. 

and, lo and behold — there he is.

gojo looks the same as always. grinning brightly, a little woflish, wearing those ugly sunglasses and making his way across the room like he owns it. a trait you can’t help but admire, envy, hate and worship at the same time. he plops down next to you like it’s nothing, a little too close for comfort, unconcerned about your concept of personal space.

”whatcha up to?” he chirps, in that sugar sweet tone, layered over with a boyish kind of excitement. there’s a teasing tilt to it, too — the one that always accompanies his voice when he’s speaking to you.

under normal circumstances, you’d flip him off. maybe even just glare at him, silently, or raise a brow in challenge.

but you’re far, far too tired to. too anxious. too in need of sleep, in need of a peaceful breakfast that he oh so cruelly ripped from you. all you can muster is the energy to glance his way.

for just a second, your eyes meet. not like you can actually see them, from behind his glasses — but you know they’re there. menacing and uncanny, bright and excited. too much to handle, right now.

”… morning.”

as soon as the mutter has left your lips, you take a tentative bite of your sandwich. gaze trailing sluggishly back to your plate.

gojo blinks.

he immediately notes that your voice sounds meek. even more so than usual. he expected you to give him a scoff, or even just a timid huff — but no such luck. 

you’re just sitting there, quiet, curling into yourself.

after a moment’s consideration, gojo opts to look at you. to really look at you, study your face, the way those twitchy fingers move to curl around the ceramic handle of the cup you’re drinking out of. the way your eyes shift from place to place, unfocused, your eyelids flicking shut every couple seconds. slow.

he’s always been observant — but it doesn’t take a genius to see that you’re tired. 

gojo is silent, for no more than a mere moment; contemplating his next course of action. he’s never seen you like this, before. did something happen?

…

(— well, it doesn’t matter. not his problem.)

”you look like a zombie,” he grins, a little teasing, showing off the white of his teeth. even though you look out of it, he can’t help himself — despite his own intuition telling him to let you be. 

you’re just too fun to tease. suguru and shoko only ever raise their eyebrows at him, or stare him down like a misbehaving dog, but you always have a good reaction to give. something to entertain him when he’s bored, distract him when his mind is too full of noise. 

so he can’t help but tease you, a little. hoping it’ll soothe the restlessness inside his chest.

but for once, what gojo expects isn’t what he gets. 

what he expects is for you to glare at him. tell him to leave you alone, or even just sigh in exasperation — either one would be fine. it’s just mindless enjoyment, to him, a little fun to lighten up his day. 

especially now, when suguru is away on some day trip he wasn’t privy to. that traitor. shoko is nowhere to be seen, either, probably off smoking in some random alleyway. or hanging out with one of the kyoto losers.

… the whole dorm is so eerily quiet.

(gojo would never admit it, not in a thousand years… but maybe he’d feel just a little bit lonely without any of you around.)

for a while after waking up, he assumed he’d have to spend the whole day alone. no one to talk to, no one to look at. he was practically dying of boredom. but then he entered the kitchen — and saw his saving grace. his dear little irritable classmate. 

he was so relieved. content in the knowledge that he’d get to push your buttons to his heart’s desire, bask in your playful banter and cold, joking little looks until suguru finally comes home.

only this time — you don’t react at all. 

you don’t give him what he expects, don’t indulge his little antics, in the way he’s grown so accustomed to. you just keep eating your breakfast, and drinking your coffee, in total silence. 

gojo waits, just a couple moments more. hoping for a delayed reaction, a witty counter, a snarky comment. anything. 

but it never comes.

finally, he starts to sulk. slumping against the leather seat behind him, quieting down with a low huff. furrowing his brows, as his glossy, cherry-tasting lips curl down into a little pout.

honestly, he’s kind of annoyed. just what is your problem? what is with you, today? 

… it’s no fun if you’re not playing along. 

gojo can’t help but grumble, a little, under his breath. you’re usually so responsive, so easy to rile up. so what’s wrong? why are you just sitting there?

…

whatever. so what if you’re not talking to him? so what if you won’t even spare him a glance? gojo has better things to do, bigger fish to fry. he wasn’t even that excited, when he saw you. the thought of bantering with you didn’t lift his spirits, even in the slightest. 

not even a little bit.

…

but, really — would it take so much effort for you to just say something? to just respond to his friendly little quip? you can’t possibly be that tired. 

or, what — did you get insecure, or something? because he called you a zombie? no way. you’re not that sensitive… are you? or is that it? 

what a hassle.

you know he’s just messing with you. he knows you know. so why are you acting so…. 

(sad, gojo wants to think, but he buries the thought before it can reach his frontal cortex. he doesn’t want to empathize with you, not right now — doesn’t want to feel that discomforting pang in his chest.)

a strange sensation bubbles up in his chest. something frustrated, a little unnerved; at your lack of a reaction, the weak glint in your eyes. he just doesn’t understand why — and that frustrates him even more. 

why can’t you just bite back, like always?

(… it’s fun when you do.)

the silence lingers on, stretches out across the room, festers and grows as you gulp down your breakfast. all while gojo keeps on sulking, still sitting beside you, waiting for something to happen. he briefly considers getting up and leaving, or saying something annoying to hopefully spur you on —

but you stand up before he can convince himself to go through with either option.

having finished your breakfast, your legs carry you to the sink. finally, you can head back to your room. gojo’s being weirdly quiet, but you pay no mind to it; methodically washing your dishes in silence. 

you don’t bother saying goodbye to him, either. still sitting there, seemingly deep in thought, grumbling something under his breath. 

he watches as you leave, gaze trailing after you, until you’re completely out of sight. 

then he lays down, flat on his back, with a frustrated huff. trying desperately to brush away the memory of your dim eyes, the slight frown on your lips. the dark circles under your eyes, that he tried so hard not to notice because they made him feel so weirdly uncomfortable. the meek, meek look you gave him.

gojo sighs.

(he feels just a tiny, tiny bit bad.)

when you wake up from your slumber, you immediately note that your body feels lighter.

this time, no nightmares came to haunt you. having practically collapsed once your head hit the pillow, your body finally decided to give you some peace of mind, some well needed rest. thankfully.

with a groan, you lazily stretch out your limbs — enjoying the feeling of your veins waking up, gaze falling on the clock on your wall. you’ve only been asleep for about two hours, or so, but it’s more than enough to give you the little jolt of energy that you need.

what to do, what to do. you still have the whole day ahead of you. another nap wouldn’t hurt, but you don’t want to waste your precious free time just rotting in bed — maybe you could take a walk around the schoolyard instead? the cherry blossoms have started to unfurl, and the grounds of the school are just littered with them.

even just the mental image is enough to have you changing into some light and comfortable clothes, reaching a hand out to push your door open. excitement stirring in your veins.

as you do so, something is knocked over.

all you hear is a soft little thud, accompanied by the sensation of something colliding with the door. a low curiosity overtakes you — eagerly peeking around for a look at the mysterious something.

your gaze falls on something pink.

it’s tiny, awfully out of place, just laying unassumingly on the dusty floorboards. as you crouch down to get a better look, you recognize it instantly; a small carton of strawberry milk. a plastic straw plastered on its side, and an evil looking cow mascot staring at you from the front. one of the items sold in the schoolyard’s vending machines — your personal favorite. you drink it every time you need a tiny pick-me-up, the sweet taste always managing to soothe your spirits.

and it was sitting right outside your door.

you stare at it, silently, in deep contemplation. holding it in your hand as the gears turn inside your head. could someone have dropped it? no, that’s dumb — who’d drop it right outside your door and then not pick it up?

… did someone leave it for you, then? because they know you like it? that could be it, maybe, but who would —

…

your mind stills. 

(no way.)

when you think about it — that’s the only explanation that makes sense. shoko and geto aren’t there, and you barely know any of your senior students. yaga-sensei would never give you strawberry milk without a lecture on the dangers of cavities, either.

that just leaves one possible culprit.

but you can’t wrap your head around it. why would he do something like that? he doesn’t like you — you know that much. so it couldn’t possibly be him.

… then again, you have seen him drink it. both of you like it, contrary to your other classmates; shoko doesn’t like sweet things in general, and geto wouldn’t go for strawberry milk if he could choose something else. it might as well be the only thing you and gojo have in common — the one thing that binds you two together. 

a single carton of strawberry milk. 

it’s almost comical.

(if it’s really true — if he really did do it… then you wonder why. maybe he noticed that you were feeling under the weather, and figured it’d make you happy. 

you wonder if it’d be foolish of you, to believe that it’s true — if only because you kinda like the idea.)

your feet move on their own, before your mind has a chance to question the decision. 

where could he be? in the kitchen, still? in his dorm?

just as you begin to wonder, a flash of white dances in the corners of your vision. when you glance out the window, you see it; white, soft hair, like a fluffy cloud, in the midst of all the pink petals fluttering about. 

you stop.

then you start walking again. with more decision, this time. hurrying to the exit.

gojo is sitting right outside the dormitory, on a wooden bench, legs swinging idly as he gazes at the sky. his hair sways slightly with the breeze, soft strands moving and caressing his skin. pink petals dance all around him, gracefully descending down to the ground, together with a trail of bubbles. gojo is blowing them, haphazardly, following their movement with his keen eyes. they glimmer in the sunlight, reflecting all shades of the rainbow.

the sight is just a little bit breathtaking. 

the ground crunches beneath your feet, when you take a step forward — and gojo turns towards you. you stiffen like a deer in headlights, instantly regretting your decision. blinking nervously. you walked here almost entirely on impulse, but now that you’re face to face…

(it’s a little scary.)

… still, it’s far too late to back out now. you can’t do much except join him, so that’s exactly what you do — albeit a little hesitantly.

trying to ignore his continuous stare, burning into the side of your head, you plop down beside him. feeling the steady bench beneath you, breathing in the scent of sweet-smelling cherries and soap.

an uncomfortable silence lingers in the air around you both, as he waits for you to say something. 

it’s a little tough. mustering up the courage to say anything, even just to face him. the decisiveness you felt just a moment ago has faded, now only the ghost of a sensation — you’re too nervous to verbalize anything.

but eventually, after a deep breath or two, you force yourself to speak. hoping you won’t come to regret it.

”… hey, gojo?” 

it’s almost a whisper. soft and fragile, mumbled beneath your breath as you stare at the cherry trees in front of you. you know his eyes are on you, though. you can feel them, almost feel their weight in the palm of your hand. like marbles.

weakly, you raise up the carton of strawberry milk. glancing over at him, not quite managing a smile, but trying your best to look somewhat appreciative. 

”thanks.”

a confused blink. gojo looks down the strawberry milk, and then back up at you. eyelashes fluttering.

a moment passes. 

then he turns his head away, swiftly, his hair tousled by the movement — a couple pink petals stuck between the soft strands. you can’t see his face anymore.

”i have no idea what you’re talking about,” he huffs, with a voice you’ve never heard him speak through.

when you look a little closer — you think the tips of his ears may be just slightly red. it makes your lips curl up into a small smile, but you barely feel it.

(like this, he’s actually kind of cute.)

cherry blossoms flutter in the wind, dancing joyously, without a care in the world. a spring breeze ruffles gojo’s hair, as he sits beside you, having begun to blow his bubbles again. not saying a word, and looking straight ahead. but you can’t help but stare, as sneakily as you can muster.

you find yourself thinking that he looks right at home, among the petals. fleeting, hard to get a grasp on, so pretty, and so out of reach — despite being so close. 

if you wanted to, you could reach over and touch him. you could reach for his sunglasses, lift them off his face, and finally see those eyes he’s so intent on hiding. you could see him, see straight into his soul — and find out who he really is.

you won’t, though. some boundaries aren’t meant to be so callously crossed.

instead, you puncture the pink carton in your hand with the plastic straw, and take a tentative sip. the sweet taste soothes you, straight away, blooming on your tongue. you can’t help but sigh, softly, relaxing even further — it’s absolutely perfect, for this kind of weather. the sight before you, cherry petals and shining bubbles, a boy you don’t like, but definitely don’t hate. 

you both look up, following the bubbles with your eyes, as they float up into the sky; as they get smaller and smaller, farther and farther out of reach. neither of you say a word, but the silence is comforting. light. 

gojo is the first one to break it — in a voice so small you barely hear it.

”… you don’t look like a zombie.”

a second passes. you’re left blinking in confusion, trying to decipher the sudden statement. you can’t get a good read on his expression, with those eyes of his conveniently hidden; he must have regained his composure, then.

it takes a couple seconds for his words to sink in — but once they do, all pieces seem to fall into place. 

and you burst into laughter.

gojo blinks at you, caught off guard, his eyelashes flapping like a little dove scrambling to get off the ground — staring at you like you just grew a second head. that makes you laugh harder, a bout of giggles spilling past your lips — you just can’t help it. 

”did —” you wheeze, softly, thoroughly amused. trying and failing to bite back the laughter. ”did you think i was bothered by that, or something?”

gojo looks at you. a little stunned, for a moment. the sight only makes your smile bloom further, eyes crinkled as you meet his gaze. from the angle you’re viewing him through, leaning back against the bench, you catch a glimmer of his eyes. they’re awfully pretty — blue and bright, full of life. when you look closer, you can see tiny, tiny splotches of white. 

they look like the blue sky. 

you called them menacing, before, but now you aren’t so sure. they seem soft, in the sunlight, especially when seen like this — right after catching him off guard. it’s a rare moment, terribly precious. something to savour.

gojo doesn’t let it linger, though. 

after a moment of two, he scoffs — turning away yet again. a soft, soft pout on his lips.

”obviously not,” he huffs, sounding nothing but irritated, resting his jaw on the heel of his palm. ”but with how sensitive you are, i wouldn’t be surprised.”

usually, a comment like that would irk you. now it just makes you giggle, lightheartedly — the tips of his ears turning redder at the sound. 

(he really isn’t so bad, after all.)

for a while, you don’t say anything else. afraid of ruining the tender atmosphere. you feel closer to gojo than ever before — and you wonder if maybe this is the gojo that geto sees. childish, but well meaning. arrogant and cocky, but oddly innocent. selfish — but not really. you’re starting to think that you may have been slightly off, with that one.

the strawberry milk on your tongue tastes sweet. a little sweeter than usual, though you choose not to dwell on it.

”hey,” you break the silence, surprising even yourself. the words fall from your lips like soft little breaths, rolling off your tongue like marbles pouring out of a glass bottle. ”i don’t dislike you, you know?”

it’s an impulsive admission. saying it out loud doesn’t feel wrong, though. maybe a little humiliating, sure, but not wrong. not dishonest.

you suspect that gojo may be looking at you, out of the corner of his eye, but you aren’t sure. after all, you’re vehemently avoiding his gaze — a little embarrassed by your own sincerity. 

he doesn’t know how to respond. you’re being strangely unpredictable, today, and it makes him feel unsure of himself. your tone is soft, almost friendly. he only ever hears it when you’re talking to shoko or geto.

not learning his lesson, gojo opts to tease you again. as always. afraid to let the silence linger for too long. it’s a halfhearted attempt, though, more of a vaguely amused huff than anything. 

”what, got a crush on me or somethin’?”

this time, you don’t scoff, or roll your eyes, or give him an earnest fuck right off. you only chuckle, in a way that almost borders on fond. you’re not one to tease, contrary to the boy on your left, but your words are teasing even still. ”i have better taste than that.” 

gojo should be irked, should grumble and bite back, but you don’t give him the chance to. 

”i just… you know,” you taste the words on your tongue. ”i still think you’re annoying. and childish.” gojo huffs, and your lips curl up. ”but i really don’t dislike you.”

you take a sip of the strawberry milk, before continuing, hoping it’ll make the words easier to say. ”… and it’s not like i know you, anyway. so i’m sorry for making a bunch of assumptions.” 

a pause. for a split second, you quiet down, a little flustered. gnawing on your bottom lip.

”… that’s all i wanted to say,” you exhale, gaze glued to your lap. feeling a heat on your nape.

as always, you can’t tell what gojo’s thinking. out of the corner of your eye, you try to catch a glimpse of his face, but you have a nagging suspicion that it wouldn’t tell you anything anyway. his eyes are hidden by those sunglasses, after all, acting as a wall between him and the rest of the world. so you don’t know if the words reach him, if they mean anything at all. 

but you hope they do. even as you brush cherry petals and non-existent dust off your lap, and get up to leave.

gojo just sits there, for a second, deep in contemplation. 

he tries to bury a certain thought, before it has a chance to reach his frontal cortex — before he has to accept that it exists. only this time, he doesn’t succeed. the words die before they reach his tongue, but he hears them, in his head. he hears them loud and clear.

and he flushes under the light of the sun.

(i don’t really dislike you, either.) 

what actually ends up leaving his throat is merely a scoff, so faint he doubts you even hear it. 

”whatever,” he mutters, hoping it’ll come across as cool and unbothered. it doesn’t.

one last smile reaches your face, before you head back inside. gojo stays behind, on the bench, lost in thought.

tossing the now-empty carton into a trash can, you try to calm yourself down. feeling oddly excited, as if you’ve reached something, the start of an eventual conclusion. something worth cherishing.

you still don’t understand satoru gojo. but you get the impression that you just grew a little bit closer to him. there are layers to him, more than what meets the eye, hidden behind those sunglasses of his. you can only imagine what the world might look like, from his perspective. what you look like, reflected in his eyes, a blur of colours and facial features, sparks and dots.

you wonder if the whole world looks like a painting, to him. 

you feel a little ashamed, for thinking you had him all figured out. a spoiled, self-centered rich kid, with no functional empathic abilities. it might be partially true, but you’ll have to reevaluate the statement. to see how well it holds up. you still don’t think his emotional intelligence is anything to gawk at, but you may have been underestimating it. it’s there, despite everything — in those eyes, in that single carton of strawberry milk.

you think there’s a certain maturity, there, in spite of his childishness. or perhaps the latter is no more than a product of the former, a way for damaged children to dress their wounds. the way he carries himself and the way he speaks both seem a bit forced. like he’s used to performing, used to moving in a way that demands attention. all eyes on him, at all times. 

you think that sounds just a little exhausting. 

even as you return to the safety of your dorm room, you still can’t help but wonder. there’s still so much you don’t know. despite the moment you shared, and the connection you think may be growing between you, he’s still so out of reach. almost lonely, in a way. you wonder what he looks like, when he’s alone, when there’s no one around to perform for. 

(what is an actor without their audience?)

and, despite everything, after all is said and done — you really, really don’t understand satoru gojo. not at all, not in the slightest. not one bit.

but you think you’d maybe like to.

[lacy-oh-lacy]

Tara Carpenter ･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ

NSFW Alphabet

Scream Masterlist | Main Masterlist

CW: Fem!Reader, general smut, semi-public sex, masturbation, praise kink, oral, strap-on, vibrator, sexting, scars

Aftercare

Yes! Tara’s so into aftercare. In general you two are so soft and sweet with each other so of course after sex you just want to cuddle up and make sure the other had a good time.

Body part

On you: Your chest. It’s where your heart and your boobs are, how could she not love it?

On herself: She likes her hands, for someone so petite they’re pretty strong. Plus, the effect they have on you doesn’t hurt.

Cum

In theory Tara wouldn’t want to make a mess but when she’s in the moment feeling your cum or seeing her cum on you turns her on so much.

Dirty secret

She likes the idea of getting caught having sex. She doesn’t genuinely want to be, but when she knows there’s a risk of it it’s such a turn on for her. She’s also into the idea of being caught masturbating but only by you, and she has deliberately let that happen before.

Experience 

She’s only had a few hookups but that’s enough for her to know what she’s doing.

Favorite position 

Cowgirl is her favorite, regardless of who’s on top. She likes getting to take charge when she is and, again, she’s fond of your chest so of course she loves watching you bounce on top of her.

Goofy

Serious and emotional sex does happen, but in general the mood is pretty lighthearted, lots of giggling and good-natured teasing is the norm.

Hair

She proffers just a neat trim.

Intimacy 

Your relationship is very sweet and intimate so that shines through in the bedroom, all your actions are filled with so much love and affection.

Jack off

Sometimes. It was more common before you got together. When you start having sex you do it pretty frequently so it’s not often she has to take care of herself.

Kink

She’s got a praise kink, enthusiasm in general turns her on so she adores a vocal and active lover. Once again, she’s also into the idea of getting caught. Besides that she does like testing out other kinks but none have really stuck.

Location 

Having roommates, you’re not only limited to the bedroom, you’re also limited by timing. Because of that (and her aforementioned kink) you do have a lot of semi-public hookups when you get the chance, like at parties for instance.

Motivation 

Kind of obvious, but flirting is how she usually gets in the mood, seeing your sultry side -whether you’re a natural seductress or a total dork- always gets her going.

No

She’s not too into sadism, giving or receiving. Pain play and degradation just kind of put her in a dark headspace.

Oral

She loves giving and receiving oral, what she proffers may change on the day but if she had to pick one: probably giving.

Pace

Kinda medium, maybe a little on the fast end but Tara does like to take her time when she can.

Quickie 

Absolutely. Sometimes you pretty much have to because you’re rushing to finish before your roommates get back.

Risk

As long as the stakes aren’t too high Tara is into some risk-taking. She’s not afraid of getting caught or experimenting, she actually likes the thrill of it.

Stamina 

One round is usually satisfactory but she could easily go a couple more if you felt like it. She has that final girl stamina.

Toy

A strap-on’s the only thing you guys use regularly. You also own a vibrator but it’s more of a special occasion when that comes out.

Unfair

Honestly she teases you more in a non-sexual way. The sexual kind does happen but she can’t really bring herself to deny you for long.

Volume 

She moans, groans and gasps a lot and they’re all pretty loud. It’s always a struggle to keep her quiet when you’re in a riskier location.

Wild card

You two sext a lot, usually initiated by her, often when you least expect it.

X-Ray

She has a lot of scars on her tiny body, and though she isn’t especially insecure about them she does appreciate confirmation that you find her attractive under her clothes, whether that’s through praise or the lustful way you look at her.

Yearning 

Her libido’s a bit on the high side. She doesn’t try to get in your pants every time she sees you or anything, but ideally she’d like to at least a couple times a week.

Zzz

She loves falling asleep together afterwards, or if not at least cuddling and talking for a while. Either way she doesn’t want to leave the bed too soon.

[hannieehaee]

18+ / mdi

content: friends to lovers, sub!seungkwan, sub!reader (but not as much as him lbr), smut, f reader, non penetrative sex, grinding, too many run on sentences, etc.

wc: 1521

masterlist

bestfriend!seungkwan and you, who have insane underlying sexual tension that neither of you is willing to talk about but everyone else can see.

the way you two jokingly argue with each other, constantly scolding the other one second, and cuddling chest-to-chest the next.

kwannie who envies any type of attention you give his members because you're HIS best friend and you should be doting to him only.

kwannie who gets annoyed at the sight of you giggling endlessly at chan's jokes and unknowingly flirting with vernon, who doesnt realize his best friend is in love with you and is wishing him a very inconvenient evening for even daring to steal you away in his presence.

kwannie who gets fed up of watching you go to yet another member and strike up conversation (flirting with mingyu ?? seriously ?) from afar and drags you away under the vice of 'why are you hogging my friends? get your own!' and leads you to a more secluded area.

you, annoyed (but not really) at his antics, start to pick a fight with him, enjoying the unserious back and forth you tend to have with each other.

it's all going as usual; both of you still in denial about the tension between you and the reason for your constant discomfort at seeing the other in near proximity to anyone else. that is, until things take a shift.

the atmosphere seems different somehow. this time, kwannie seems to be taking your lighthearted flirting with his members to heart; something that you had never encountered in your years of friendship.

"why are you always flirting with them?", he whines. "do you think its fun watching MY best friend ditch me the moment she sees a pretty boy walk by? what about me??"

this is now a good ten minutes into the argument. one that is usually light-hearted enough to take place in front of the other members and ends in the members teasing seungkwan about his dependency on your attention. this time, however, seemed different.

"what about you, kwannie? you know it doesnt mean anything. theyre my friends too, they know its not serious," you argue back, feeling nervous at the serious tone of his complaints.

"its not that, its just..." he cuts himself off. "even they see it, but you dont. why is it always them? .. why wont you look my way?"

that last sentence stops you in your tracks. whatever rebuttal you had in your mind suddenly going away, not knowing how to respond.

unsure as to whether that was a confession or simple frustration at having to share his best friend, you stare blankly at him, breathing heavier than ever.

"kwannie .. of course i look at you. i love you, you're my best friend," you try to salvage the situation in the most ambiguous way you can, not knowing where this is going.

he lets out a heavy sigh, looking down at your shoes, unwilling to make eye contact with you, something very unlike the seungkwan you know.

"kwannie .. ?", you inquire and step towards him.

"we'll always be friends, right?", you nod at his question, urging him to continue "so it's okay if i talk freely? we'll always be there for each other, right?", he asks rhetorically, nodding at his own question to reassure himself.

he takes a deep breath as he walks towards you. "you know .. jeonghan hyung told me over and over to just tell you, that you would love me regardless and that i'd never lose you. but i guess you might already have some sort of idea, don't you?", he smiles sadly at you, timidly extending his hands towards yours.

you accept the embrace of his hands and nod back; head down, feeling vulnerable at the situation.

seeing as he's already put his cards on the table (kind of), you decide to walk the rest of the way for him.

you step forward and run your hands from his hands to his arms to his shoulders, closing any distance between you. he seems slightly surprised at what seems to be your reciprocation, but quickly recovers, not wanting to ruin the tender moment.

like in any teenage movie, you both stare down at each other's lips, breathing heavily at the thought of finally getting something you've wanted for years.

you make the first move and softly press your lips against his, causing you both to instantly moan against each other's mouths. it escalates quickly after that. with mouths open, and tongues desperate to get a taste of one another. your hands moving from his shoulders to his hair, pulling him as close as possible. his landing on your waist, finding their way under your shirt softly but desperately scratching at your skin.

your kiss becomes so needy and desperate it's almost impossible to call it a kiss anymore. incessant moaning into each other's mouths and spit covering both your lips. your resolve breaks first, causing you to push him into the nearest surface, which takes form of a sofa bed located behind seungkwan. you push him down, readily straddling his waist and pressing yourself even closer to him.

if seungkwan had any thoughts in his mind prior to you kissing him, theyre even further gone now. he has no control of himself as he runs his hands all over your back, wanting to remain respectful of any boundaries you may have, but going insane at your lips on his and your crotch laying so so closely to his.

you take notice of his desperation and pull off your shirt, making sure to take your bra off with it. you receive a reaction you had only ever dreamed of before.

seungkwan's desire and desperation are clear in his eyes, with his eyebrows furrowed and a whine escaping his mouth at the view of his best friend's chest bare in front of him.

"p-please, god. fuck. can i- please. please let me ..." he whines nonsensically, hands and mouth nearing your tits but not quite touching them before getting your permission.

with no verbal answer you grab his hands and fondle your own breasts with them, moaning at his whines and pleas to get his mouth on them; something which he does soon after.

grinding your crotch against the very obvious bulge in his navy shorts, you whine at the stimulation from his mouth desperately licking your tits, teeth softly pulling at the sensitive buds as he whines at the taste of your skin.

"kwannie .. fuck kwannie dont stop fuck please ..." you breathe out, shoving his face closer to your chest, grinding even faster.

despite your frustration at wanting even more pleasure from seungkwan's body, you disconnect yourself from him to remove your pants and instruct him to remove the rest of his clothes. he whines at the sudden interruption, but hurries to undress himself as soon as he sees you expectantly watch him with just your panties on, wanting you back on him as soon as humanly possible.

with now only two thin layers separating you and seungkwan, you feel the pressure of his dick against your clit even more, causing you to whine into his open mouth.

you know your grinding may be more pleasurable for you than for him, but the pleasure makes you so delirious you cant bring yourself to stop, grinding even faster and shoving your tongue in his mouth, hands harshly grabbing onto his shoulders for better accuracy in the rutting of your hips.

"kwannie- fuck please i promise i- shit. i'll do whatever you want, just let me- please let me finish. it feels so fucking good," you cry, speeding up even more, completely drunk in the feeling of your clit deliciously grinding against his pulsing length.

he seems to not mind it, even helping you meet your undoing by grabbing onto your hips and pushing them against his crotch in order to optimize your pleasure. his mouth is open, letting out whines at the thought of all the pleasure he's causing you by just sitting there.

unbeknownst to you, seungkwan is also nearing his end, felling insane pleasure at the friction caused from the canting of your hips against his. he's the first to find his high, whining into your neck as your never ending grinding continues its course atop his sensitive dick.

it's soon after that you also reach your high and deflate against his warm chest, weakly running your hands into his hair, pulling him for an uncharacteristically sweet peck.

"thank you," you breathe against his cheek. "i wasnt sure where that argument was going, but im glad it ended here," you giggle as you feel his chest shake from his own chuckle.

"sorry i was so dramatic, but i guess it worked in both of our favours so .. you're welcome," he jokes, running his hands up and down your back soothingly.

after a few more teasing comments back and forth, you help clean each other up with whatever wipes and tissues are at your disposal and dress yourselves back up.

it was safe to say that after this, flirting with his members was strictly prohibited.

a/n: i love seungkwan more than life itself which is why i feel kinda bad writing such filth abt him but i also want him so bad so .. anyways this was not proofread bc im too lazy to reread this many words over again. pls lmk if theres anything that makes zero sense that i should change tho <3

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Can we have T-Dolls/Gryphin staff (Angelia + Kalina) getting a message from the medical bay about their S/O getting injured when test firing a new gun?

It was the recoil. It’s on par with a Nikke’s weapon. They got ragdolled across the firing range.

(GFL/NIKKE) M16A1, M4 SOPMOD II, Angelia, Kalina, Rapi, Anis, and Neon's S/O getting injured by recoil

M16A1 winces at the message received and gives a wry chuckle.

(M16A1) "Oh man, that's gotta hurt..."

It's a good thing they never tried the gun she usually carried in her case, she was pretty sure that would tear a human in half. Not even most T-Dolls could withstand the recoil on that bad boy.

Regardless, she makes her way to the medbay with a lighthearted smile.

(M16A1) "Yo, heard you got knocked on your ass."

(S/O) "Agh, yeah something like that."

(M16A1) "Was the gun at least functional?"

(S/O) "I mean, I guess I did obliterate the training dummy."

(M16A1) "Then good job! You further advanced science, or something like that."

(S/O) "Did you come here just to tease me, Sixteen?"

M16A1 just smiled at that.

SOPMOD immediately hops off the chair was sitting in and rushes towards the medbay.

(M4 SOPMOD II) "OH NO! S/O was using my guns, weren't they!?"

Those weren't even sanctioned by Griffin, mostly being her own personal test weapons!

A T-Doll couldn't handle them, let alone a human!

SOPMOD opens the door and breathes easy, seeing them thankfully alive.

(M4 SOPMOD II) "S/O! Why did you use my guns- No, wait! Did they work, were they cool?!"

(S/O) "Ack, that was yours?! How do you even lug that around?!"

(M4 SOPMOD II) "I carry it in a REALLY big bag! But how did you even get access to it?"

(S/O) "It was thrown alongside the experimental weapons the Commander wanted tested! Did you mix that pile up with yours?"

(M4 SOPMOD II) "...Oops."

Angelia sighs upon receiving the message on her phone.

(Angelia) "Well, can't say I'm exactly surprised."

She goes to personally see S/O in the medbay, with her leaning against the wall as soon as she entered.

(Angelia) "Told you so."

(S/O) "Ow...! Yeah yeah, you were right, I was going to get hurt."

(Angelia) "Did you at least brace the way I told you to?"

(S/O) "Hah, tried to. Kind of hard to do that when you're flying in the air."

With a little hum of acknowledgement, she turns around and waves a hand.

(Angelia) "Well, you'll live. Just see me when they let you out."

Kalina can't help but cringe at the news, fingers fidgeting as a slight feeling of guilt washed over her.

It was her idea to go test out the new weapons, so she couldn't help but feel partially responsible.

(Kalina) "Oooh, crap!"

She pokes her head through the medbay door to see a cast over S/O's arm.

(Kalina) "Ouch! How bad is it?"

(S/O) "Just 2 weeks, nothing that broken, just one hell of a bruise...And uh, muscles pulled. Maybe more than a few."

(Kalina) "Sorry, I should've warned you that those weapon tests aren't really kind to us humans!"

(S/O) "Psh, no kidding! Well, we got the results at least but I can't say I'm exactly entirely pleased about it...You're not making me foot the medical bill out my paycheck, are you?"

(Kalina) "C-Come on, would I really do that?"

(S/O) "..."

(Kalina) "Hey, don't go all silent on me!"

Rapi is of course concerned, but she isn't exactly surprised.

A NIKKE's weapon was extremely powerful, and ordinarily humans shouldn't even be going near them.

But S/O volunteered for weapons testing for the Commander, which led to her sitting next to them in the medbay.

(S/O) "G-Guess I underestimated how easy you guys make it look..."

(Rapi) "We were designed to handle the weapons, S/O. I'm just thankful you aren't hurt more than you are."

(S/O) "That'll teach me to try and help you all fight, hah..."

Rapi squeezes their hand gently, making sure not to hurt S/O further.

(Rapi) "You don't need to do something so dangerous to let me know how you feel, S/O."

Anis can't help but snicker, at least a little.

I mean, S/O was going to fire a NIKKE weapon, what were they honestly expecting? To take the recoil like a human gun?

She brings some soda for S/O as she plops down on their bed, flashing a cheeky grin.

(Anis) "Soooo, how'd it go?"

(S/O) "You tell me! How do you even fire your launcher without it forcing your entire body back?!"

(Anis) "Psh, what you were handling is a pea shooter compared to mine! You're lucky your arms didn't go flying off!"

Patting their leg she tried to brighten their mood, which thankfully was working.

(Anis) "Next time, leave the weapons testing to Neon? She may be smaller than you, but she can actually take a hit."

Neon immediately begins panicking at the message.

S/O was test firing her guns?! They were probably in 400 pieces in the medbay right now!

(Neon) "S/O, ARE YOU ALIVE?!"

(S/O) "Somehow...-"

Neon goes in to hug S/O, making them wince in pain.

(S/O) "Ow! Neon!-"

(Neon) "Whoops, s-sorry! Master told me that you were trying to test my weapons! That kind of firepower isn't meant for you to handle!"

(S/O) "I can at least see why you like it so much, the destructive power is insane, and that's just the kickback!"

Neon puffed her chest out a little in pride at their comment.

(Neon) "Well of course! Anything less than that would be an insult to the art!"

[lanawinterscigarettes]

Hello, there! I would like some Rachel Green x reader fluff, please?

I absolutely can! I've been rewatching Friends recently so I figured now would be the perfect time to work on some of the asks I have for it

Lipstick Stains (Rachel Green x gn reader)

Warnings: none unless the idea of a semi-permanent lipstick stain on a shirt collar bothers you

You and Rachel had been seeing each other for the past couple of weeks, unbeknownst to your group of friends. It's not that you didn't want to tell them, you just knew how nosy they were and didn't feel like answering a ton of their prying questions. Not to mention it would make things awkward between you and Ross since he and Rachel used to date.

Everything had been going perfectly until one fateful morning when you arrived at Monica's apartment before work, as per custom. You greeted everybody like usual and gave Rachel a knowing look that said you'd kiss her if there wasn't anybody else around. Nothing was out of the ordinary, or so you thought.

"Hey, are you still single?" Monica suddenly asked as you poured yourself a cup of coffee.

"Um..." You quickly glanced over at your secret girlfriend, who'd immediately perked up at the question. "That all depends, why?"

"Well, because there's someone I go to work with that I think would be perfect for you," she continued as she took a seat at the small kitchen table, not noticing the look you and Rachel had shared.

"Actually, I'm kind of already seeing someone." The words slipped out of your mouth before you could even stop them. I mean, you didn't exactly want to lie about your dating life, especially when the person you were seeing was sitting right there.

"Really?" Both Monica and Rachel said in unison at your response. Monica looked confused whereas Rachel just seemed curious.

"Uh, yeah, really." You set the coffee pot down and blew on your cup before taking a small sip, to taste. "I know I haven't really talked about her before, but we promised to keep things between us for the time being."

"Clearly not entirely between you two," Phoebe piped up from the background, letting out a soft scoff.

Tilting your head slightly to the side in confusion, you asked, "Sorry?"

"Um, the lipstick stain on your shirt collar is a great indicator of 'keeping things between only you'," she sarcastically answered while gesturing to your shirt.

You looked down, and sure enough, there was a lipstick stain right on the inner collar. "Oh. Well, this is embarrassing."

"Try having a mom who talks about her sex life on TV interviews, then come tell me about embarrassing," Chandler muttered, to which Monica gave him a lighthearted slap on the back of the head.

"Hey, doesn't that color look familiar?" Joey asked as he stood and got closer, his brow furrowed in concentration.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," you feigned ignorance while focusing on your cup of coffee.

"Hey, yeah, it kind of does," Ross agreed as he also studied the lipstick stain on your shirt collar. "You know, it's really funny, because when Rachel and I dated she used to leave lipstick marks on my shirts all the time on accident. And it was in this exact color, and they were always... always on the inner part of the collar, too..." His voice began to trail off as he started to put two and two together.

Everyone turned to look at Rachel, who was attempting to focus her attention on her recent manicure rather than the other people in the room. "Oops," she muttered under her breath.

As if on cue everyone turned back to look at you again. You had your head tilted down slightly and your eyes looking at the floor. Slowly, you lifted your head back up and gave them an innocent smile before asking, "So about Chandler's mom, that's really crazy, huh?"

End notes: this is pretty short but I couldn't think of anything else to add so I just ended it there 🤷‍♂️ I hope you like it regardless

Likes < reblogs | comments are greatly appreciated | requests are currently open

Main masterlist | Friends masterlist | wanna be added to my taglist?

🏷 taglist: @missmewts @ghot-girl @your-next-daydream @alexxavicry @noisy-dumb-piece-of-shit @lovelyy-moonlight @theonetruepotato87

[m34gs]

so, a little rant.

Hey so, if I choose, when writing fanfic, to write Yukio Okumura or Renzou Shima doing Not Great Things, making Not Great Choices, or straight-up Behaving Badly; that is not an indication that I hate them, nor is it an invitation for people to come bash their characters to me. I'm not doing it out of malice for them. I'm doing it because I love them. I love their bad choices. I love their frustration and their anger and the fact they are literal teenagers acting how teenagers will. I love the different facets of their characters.

I love that Shima comes across as the "girl-obsessed play-boy" type when he's really not. I love that, while he is somewhat lighthearted at times, he's mostly hiding part of himself. I love him so much. It's easy to, from an outside perspective, condemn his joining of the illuminati. However, he was a teenage boy, in a family where he was told EXACTLY how his life was gonna go, and made to feel that he had to carry a burden he didn't want, and constantly reminded of the oldest brother that died that he never got to meet. It's normal for teens to want to try new things and to try and be independent and make their own choices (even if those choices end poorly) in even a regular, healthy setting growing up. With all of that added on, is it any surprise that he thought spying for the illuminati would be a good idea? Furthermore, the illuminati aren't fucking idiots. Of course they found the child that seemed to be struggling with following along a course of life he found no real attachment to. They're not gonna be able to convince someone who's sense of identity is rooted firmly against them. They're going to prey on a person's insecurities and needs. Not once did Shima feel like he was asked what he wanted to do. His brothers are old enough to remember the oldest, and to feel strongly about his death and want to take on the mantle, but Shima doesn't have those memories and connection. Of course he's gonna feel like he's being forced into things he doesn't wanna do. And then something interesting comes along and he decides to try it. Again, he is a teenager. He can't be expected to conduct himself within the same expectations as an adult.

Plus, he figures it out in the end. He figures out he values his friends. He feels guilty about the betrayal. He chooses their side later on. He makes a choice. But, it's *his* choice, not something he was forced to choose.

I also can't help but feel that if he didn't have that "girl-crazy" aspect to him, people would be a lot more forgiving to his character. Which is annoying. I mean, don't like him if you don't want to like him, that's fine. But he's also acting like a teenage boy in that moment. Yeah, his jokes don't always land and they're pretty perverted at times; but have you ever fucking met a teenager, regardless of gender? They make dumb jokes. They say stupid shit. They talk about raunchy things. And, as we go further into his character, it's not actually that he's Like That. He exaggerates a lot of his characteristics. I mean, who would think that the goofy, can't-get-a-date, yet desperate for girls, teenager with pink fucking hair is someone even capable of being a spy? Yeah, he likes girls. Yeah, he likes Izumo. Yeah, he's a bit of an idiot and he really can't seem to get a date, and he's a dork, but when we finally get the betrayal and the reveal, there's a part of him that is *different* and it has been hiding. He has more confidence than he lets on. He's more skilled than he lets on. And he's more conflicted over what he's doing than he lets on.

Let's not forget he's also being monitored by the illuminati, even if he is spying for them. As I said, they're not stupid. So, of course he has to put on a front, even when he might think he's alone with friends.

The thing is, I love his character, I love his development. I love experimenting with him making bad choices or engaging in dark behaviour. He's special to me. I tend to avoid fics that bash him or hate on him, which is my personal choice. I won't go after people writing those kinds of fics because they can write whatever kind of fic they want and enjoy it however they choose. But don't think for one second that I'm ever happy to see people hating on him in my comment sections or messages. I don't write him as dark or twisted because I hate him. I do it because exploring negative character aspects and negative character growth is one of the highest forms of love I can bestow upon my beloved faves.

The same goes for Yukio.

Yukio is, again, a literal teenager. He was forced into an adult role far too soon. He lost his father figure and didn't even get to say goodbye. He is fucking *grieving* but at the same time he now has to help his older brother figure out the world of Exorcists, while also keeping it a secret that he's the son of Satan. Unfortunately, Rin is not that good at keeping those kind of secrets and also has a shit ton of factors working against him; like unexpected visits from Amaimon, difficult to control powers, and being a bit hotheaded. Yukio is supposed to protect Rin, but within a few months of realizing his powers, Rin is suddenly being persecuted by The Entire Vatican, and scheduled for execution. Do people think it's easy to watch your twin brother get persecuted for something that's not his fault?

Not only that, but Yukio has an inferiority complex. Rin was born with the physical strength. Rin was born with Satan's flames. Yukio was not. Yukio was reliant on Rin when they were really little. And that still frustrates him to this day. On top of the fears of Rin being executed, the stress of being an exorcist, the demands of being a teacher, and the loneliness of having lost Shiro, Yukio also feels inadequate and has a thirst to prove that he is just as good as Rin. While Yukio has to work his ass off to get where he is, Rin comes by strength more naturally and that irritates Yukio. Yet, he also hates himself for feeling that way because what kind of brother thinks like that?

In addition to all of this inner turmoil, Yukio lives in constant fear that he will awaken demonic powers as well. He has a front-row seat to how much people hate Rin on-sight for just existing as the Son of Satan with blue flames. Yukio has built up reputation, connections, and skills. He has worked so hard for this. But, if he shows one ounce of demonic ability, it could all burn to the ground. And this is something he has zero actual control over.

It's clear when, in the manga, he does start to awaken things, just how panicked he is. He's skipping his physical. He's trying to avoid others. He can't let them find out because all his hard work will be as good as gone and not having demonic powers was both at once a source of jealousy against Rin but also a fucking comfort because he wasn't up there on the chopping block.

He is in so much turmoil, and for people to just go "he's treating Rin poorly" or "he's not fair to Rin"; like, yeah, he isn't. He is not treating Rin fairly or nicely. But it's not like most other people would be able to manage everything he is going through AND be the Ultimate Best Supportive Brother on top of it all. Give the guy a break.

I hate the idea of characters needing to always act Correctly (TM) even when facing the most extreme and awful circumstances, lest they become condemned and hated by fandom. For one, it's nowhere near realistic. And two, how fucking boring would it be to never see characters make big, high-stakes mistakes? No, their circumstances don't mean their actions are "good" or "excusable"; but it gives a lot of light onto why they act the way they do and that is the more important part. Understanding characters and their motives is way more important than making sure you only like the "good" characters. That's where the reading comprehension comes in. That's where people can practice and learn to think about how a person's circumstances and environment might influence them. That's where people can explore the fact that "good" and "bad" are overly simplistic terms that really have no business being applied to people; as people can behave in both "good" and "bad" ways...often even within the same day. People are far too diverse in personality and actions to ever be categorized fully into neat little boxes of "good person", "bad person", and that is reflected very well in both Yukio's and Shima's characters.

[under-the-dirt]

Hello!!! Could i get Price x reader who ends up falling him but ends up ignoring him couse they to fall in love kind of thing but then he confronted them eventully.

sorry i didn’t answer this earlier!! i started it and then it deleted the draft :[ but anyways, i love this req ty nonnie!!

pairing: john price x gn!reader

tags: a lil angst but not really, somehow i managed gn!reader w a lil smut, implied masturbation, uhhhh lmk if i missed anything cuz i probably UNDER 13 DNI RAH

Avoiding the captain was hard. He was just about everywhere you went, regardless. Wether it be the gym, common room, kitchen, anywhere you went, he seemed to be there.

It’s not that you were desperate to avoid him, it’s just that you couldn’t help the butterflies that took flight in your stomach every time you saw him, or the blush that dusted your cheeks when he talked to you, calling you love or sweetheart, all lighthearted but god, so, so sexy.

You’d been avoiding him for weeks now, and you’ve noticed he’s begun to seem almost.. annoyed. Easier to rile up, blowing up at rookies, etc. You hoped you weren’t the cause.

It all came to a head on your recon mission, you’d been paired up with the captain and it seemed normal, up until he pulled you into an alley and pinned you to the wall, ensuring both your comms were off before he began.

“You go’ a reason fer avoidin’ me, yeah?” He questions, sliding his knee between your legs to keep you up and unable to move and squirm.

“N-no sir.” You respond, gathering yourself from the surprise of his sudden actions before he pushed closer, lips right by your ear.

“You sure, sergeant?”

“Yes sir.”

“Then why am I seein’ ya run away like a little school girl with a crush? Hm? Don’t think I ‘ear your pretty little moans late a’ night when you think I ain’t listening? Think I don’t ‘ear ya calling my name?” He purrs gruffly into your ear, pressing his chest to yours, moving his knee up further to rub against that spot between your legs.

“S-sir-“

“Don’ wanna ‘ear it, sergeant.” He growls, moving his knee back and forth between your legs, pulling a muffled whimper from your lips. “Ah, so thas’ why? There’s my answer right there, lovely.” He coos, chuckling before pulling away.

“Captain we can’t-“

“Wha’ did I say? Now, my office, 1900 tonight, understood, sergeant?” He asks, and you nod. “Words, sergeant.”

“Yes sir.”

“Good.”

ok this was fun to write. btw, i’m wanting to start a big series, but i have no idea what it’ll be. probably ghoap x reader, price x reader or tf141 x reader. which might b difficult cuz i’m not the best at writing gaz but wtv lmao if y’all have any tips please lmk!! also, i’d prob make an autistic coded!reader bc i’m autistic so it’d be hard not to bc i’m not sure what it’s like to be ‘normal’ on a psychological standard, so the reader would be accidentally autistic because i tend to make the reader kinda like me. but, any big series ideas please give them!!!! i want to write longer and better!

[peculiar-potato]

Among Us animated series trailer analysis post!

(+ a theory on who dies first and who the impostor might be!)

here’s the trailer if you want to watch it yourself :)

This is going to be pretty long, whoops.

~~~~

Firstly, overall impressions on the tone/artstyle!

I mentioned a lot about the art style and everything in my first analysis post, but I just want to reiterate that it’s fun and I like it, and I like seeing how they take details of the game and translate them into the show.

From what I can tell the tone seems pretty lighthearted, well, as lighthearted as a murder mystery can be. It’s a little silly but in a charming way- but with a slight hint of dread. Kinda what I expected.

I think there’s still probably a little way to go before the show is ready considering there were no voice lines in the trailer, and it seemed more like “these are the characters look how fun they are” then actual plot/scenes, but that’s okay I actually really like that we’re not really seeing any glimpses of the plot or voice acting yet!

Anyways, now to the actual trailer!

So opening shot here is The Skeld. We already kinda knew it was going to be set there, but confirmation! At the moment I don’t think the planet/moon/asteroid thing behind them is important, it’s probably just to fill up the background, but who knows, it could be something!

Maybe impostor(s) come from there or something… or maybe it’s just a rock in space.

(My theories get better I promise)

With this image, we finally have an answer to my question from last time- what kind of pizza do the beans eat?

I noticed immediately that there was prosciutto and arugula (a specific kind of bitter lettuce) on the pizza, and with a little googling and a few subsequent suggested searches, I managed to find recipes for fig and prosciutto pizza with, you guessed it, arugula and cheese. (There were multiple kinds of cheese it could be- goat, gorgonzola, mozzarella to name a few)

So those round things are figs. Who would have thought?

Next up we see our first glance of the additional room they added to the Skeld for the show- the kitchen! And the first glance at a depiction of an impostor!

Yellow and Brown seem like good buddies. I wonder how long that friendship will last when impostor stuff starts happening.

My guess is the depiction of the impostor here is a bit more figurative- Nobody really notices them (expect one bean, but we’ll get to that later), and they just kinda seem to be lurking around being scary. Feels more like, idk the idea of an impostor than the actual impostor? I don’t know if I’m explaining that super well.

Maybe this is like the impostor checking out the crew before they start actually impostoring. Idk.

Also, seems like one shadow (although who knows honestly). Maybe it’s a sign of there just being one among the crew? …or maybe I’ve flipped the other way and am interpreting this too literally now.

Regardless, the impostor(s) do/does certainly seem very alieny.

(Alternate impostor conspiracy theories- impostor switches between crewmates/they’re all impostors (which would kinda defeat the purpose tho) or everyone’s just paranoid and there is no impostor (I feel like people would get disappointed by that though so they wouldn’t do it)).

After that we head to navigation.

Here, Red is slacking off playing video games (oddly enough with a human in them- as someone pointed out in the Innersloth discord server, which has some interesting implications. To expand on that myself, it seems like a kind of ancient-civilization human, which is interesting. I tried to figure out what game this is with a reverse image search but I couldn’t, I wonder if it’s a real game or something one of the devs made or something else.)

Anyways Red receives a call from a shadowy figure, presumably a boss of some sort, and scrambles to look like they’re doing what they’re supposed to. The image looks kinda similar to how they’re animating the impostor, but this could be an intentional red herring or just how they’re showing an unrevealed character or an “everyman” type being. Regardless, vaguely ominous.

As for navigation itself, I like the vibes honestly. I want to go there. I love the little headslug bobble head and a lot of the details in the background. Can’t assign everything there directly to a task, but it does have the three consoles and the chair. Also I noticed the bright yellow sticky note- like the “dum” visor cosmetic! I wonder what those papers on the floor say.

Next we’re in the cafeteria. (You can tell by the coloring of the wall, this is probably the vent near weapons)

A couple things I noticed here!

First of all, everyone’s very nonchalant about Lime venting. That seems to mean it’s established that Lime is an engineer like the role in the game (honestly I’m a little surprised a new role was included here!) and that the crew knows this and doesn’t think Lime traveling though vents is a big deal. Will this extend to other crewmembers? Will this put suspicion on Lime as things progress? Who knows!

Also, small thing here, but Cyan signs Orange’s waiver (on the clipboard they seem to carry with them everywhere) simply as “Cyan”. I assumed they would just be going by colors the whole time and not have names or anything, but this kinda confirms that.

(By extension, maybe colors aren’t even codenames or anything for them lore-wise, maybe their names are literally their colors. Also makes me think there may be just one of each color in the entire series if they sign simply as a color. Then again, here I am over analyzing small details again.)

We follow Lime through a vent and into the reactor, which is being watched on the cameras by Purple.

I don’t have a ton to say about Purple, they just seem to be doing their job here. I do find it interesting that the shadow blocks out the reactor camera and then makes it malfunction (is something going to happen in there?) but it may just be a kind of moving the trailer forward type thing.

Also, side note, what’s Lime’s deal with the reactor? They run up to it and snuggle it with hearts floating above them. Engineer really loves their engine I guess haha. I know people have to have already been meming this.

Next is a scene in the medbay.

They do seem to have the medical scanner in the background there, so I wonder if that visual task will ever come into play.

Also I see the MIRA logo on a poster in the background, so my guess is they are somehow under/related to the MIRA corporation.

Green is blushing as Blue checks their reflexes. I remember Blue’s character being described as very attractive, so it could be possible that everyone gets that way around them, or it could just be Green. Idk I’m not here to navigate the minefield that is shipping beans.

White is busy swirling around wine(?) until of course, the impostor shadow thing creeps in as with all the other scenes.

This time, however, someone notices. White.

My guess is White is going to die, and they’re going to die pretty early on.

I was already kinda suspecting White was going to die first simply because of how their character is described. Rich, here because they won some kind of contest, seems to be a bit of a jerk. Feels like the kind of person who would die first idk, just a vibe I’ve had for a while.

Also, I was thinking that 11 is kind of an interesting number, especially considering there were 12 original colors. (Side note, my guess is they’re waiting to include Pink alongside Coral and Rose as “the pinks” or something if they add the new colors in a later season). I feel like maybe they wanted a main crew of ten (because that is what the original lobby size is and thus what a lot of people associate with the game), but needed someone to die early to set up the plot so they needed up with 11.

Now, White being the first and only one to notice the shadow creeping around, and to immediately look terrified and be overtaken by it on screen? My guess is they’re the first to go.

One could also argue that this is an indication of them being an impostor, but idk that feels too obvious of a way to reveal that. (Also I have a different theory as to who it could be). My guess is we won’t know who the impostor is as the audience for a while.

Finally we have this image. I have quite a bit to say about this one!

First of all, I just love this image in general. Makes me so happy to see all the beans!

Anyways, the impostor shadow thing comes in and covers the “not” in “we’re not dead” and I love that I think that’s fun. Also, again, love the falling apart blinds (why are there blinds on a spaceship?) and the balloons duct taped to the window.

We also see them eating the aforementioned fig and prosciutto pizza. There are also a lot of red spheres on the table, which I haven’t quite figured out yet. Fruits of some kind? Or decorations perhaps? Maybe all red gumballs? Whatever they are, Orange is holding one. There’s bologna or summer sausage or something near Brown, and a gray disk in front of it. Not sure about that either, looks kinda like a giant coin, or one of those round lights you tap to turn on and off. Red’s reading what seems to be a rule book (they really don’t seem prepared aha), and there’s also an image of a crewmate on the other side. I can’t tell if it’s supposed to be Pink or Tan.

Blue has a piece of paper with a skull on it which looks pretty ominous, and Brown is holding a knife, but I think those are just red herrings related to their professions. Blue’s a doctor and Brown’s a chef, and Yellow is also holding a cooking implement.

Also, once again, no sign of an emergency meeting button. (Unless the weird gray circle is related somehow?)

With that I was almost ready to wrap up the analysis…

but then I noticed something.

Idk if it’s just me but this image is giving the vibe of the Leonardo Da Vinci painting The Last Supper. I don’t know where my mind pulled this from, but I just kinda looked at it was like… wait this looks familiar. At first I thought it was just my brain making connections, but when you look at the two images right beside each other, it seems like a pretty deliberate parallel.

If it is intentional… Orange is in almost the exact same position that Judas (the betrayer) was in in the painting.

Just saying ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Maybe the red gumball thing made them an impostor /s

Also, just spitballing here, not really part of the theory, if Orange is working against the crew (either as an impostor or an accomplice), and they’re apparently affiliated with HR… what kind of implications could this have for the lore as a whole? Red’s probably just talking to their boss or something, but it feels ominous- what if MIRA (assuming that’s who’s in charge here) is in on the whole impostor thing?

But again, this is also kind of obvious of a hint, so I’m slightly skeptical of it.

Anyways, lots to think about with this, as you can tell I’m pretty excited.

[moonspirit]

Hello, Moon

Here is a headcannon we would love to hear from you about.

Since AOT is an anime that never gave us the typical beach episode as is so common, 

What do you think something like that would be like with the Ambassador Gang,

Can you picture the mischief those rascals would get up to at the beach? Id love to hear your thoughts!

Here are a few ideas I have, what do you think

Jean, Reiner, and Connie are all trying to do the beach buff thing to varying degrees of success.

Armin starts looking at lovely seashells, totally in heaven, and then he turns to see Annie in a bikini. Poor boy, he won't even stand a chance.

Bloody nose,red face

Armin has to insist he is not ill

Reiner,Jean and Annie quickly realize what happened and the two boys are laughing their heads off,

Armin and Annie are embarrassed,

Jean is laughing until he sees Pieck  in her swimwear, (I don’t know if she would be a bit more conservative with her swim wear, I always see her as choosing a one peice) despite that she is rocking it

Jean is also quickly afflicted like Armin was

Reiner is in fits

Connie legitimately believes the beach may be contaminated(he’s precious like that)

Regardless they continue their day goofing off and swimming, Armin takes Annie behind a large mound of rocks to “Look for Seashells” wink wink nudge nudge

Its a good day for all,

As always I love hearing your ideas on this.

Obligatory beach episode!!! We were robbed of more lighthearted aot content tho, yes!

When it comes to Annie & Pieck in swimsuits, idk, maybe it's just me, but I see them as wearing comfortable things haha xD So that could be a tshirt and shorts, or just a very very comfy bikini/one-piece/whatever, easy to move around in; but whichever it is - you're right that there are two (2) nosebleeding boys!

RIP Armin in particular, because Annie looks so cute no matter what it is she's wearing. A tshirt and shorts? Well it's cutely tied up at her waist so it doesn't get in the way, and her shorts are baring plenty of her strong legs. When she gets into the water then, he's the one that has to keep a check on his shorts because the sight of her wet shirt = hot as hell. And then her hair is wet, water running down her neck, sand sticking on her arms and legs, the outline of her (bikini?) underwear visible through the clothes. She's the one that's making him sweat, not the sun!

(But she's so pale, her skin burns easily, and Pieck takes her sweet time rubbing sunscreen on her much to Armin's regret. He wishes he was doing it. Pieck is very evil, as expected.)

There is no Ambassador beach episode without somebody pitching in the idea of burying Reiner in the sand and building him a mermaid body. That normally comes with building a pair of sand-boobies too, but his boobs are already so big, they decide to leave it. The result is Reiner sipping tender coconut water as he lies there under the sun, sand mermaid body and all ft. natural human tits.

Connie proposes beach volleyball! It's him & Pieck vs Jean and Annie. It's a tough match, Pieck's endurance vs Annie's agility mainly, while Reiner's their referee stuck in the sand. What's Armin doing, you ask? Well he's the pretty dainty princess, sitting under the beach umbrella and reading a book.

Not for long because they decide to kidnap him and throw him into the waves.

The six of them go for a swim! Underwater exploration! Cool fish! Colourful sea plants! Weird creatures! It's all fun and games until somebody spots a shark fin (obligatory Jaws episode?).

Beach lunch! Cold fruits and drinks! Lazing around under the sun! Playing sand games! Building a sandcastle! Turning heads (because they're all so hot, my god). Getting tanned and sunburnt!

And lastly, beach sunset viewing :3 With the fiery orange light colouring their faces, the six of them sit, quiet and tired, watching the sun go down. There's nothing more beautiful at that moment except for the shared silence of their friendship, a precious intangible thing, alive and breathing. And how many more such sunsets will they watch together?

Many. They have time now.

(That's when Aruani sneak off to "look for seashells" hehe XD)

[idyllic-affections]

HELLO!! YOUR BAIZHU WITH CHRONICALLY ILL READER IS THE BEST THING THAT'S EVERY HAPPENED!!! I've never seen a blog that does only platonic things, and as an aroace person, IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY! I wasn't too sure if you requests were open or not, but I was wondering if you could make either some headcanons or a fic where the reader (from that series) has a flare up or gets sick and Baizhu takes care of them? I'm unfortunately sick right now (just in time for when my final school assignments are due, slay 😍) but found family and hurt/comfort are literally the best thing ever, and, if put together, I'm pretty sure will cure me /j. If you requests aren't open, then please disregard this message!

Anyway, I gotta go sleep before the fever messes up my brain (if it hasn't already); so good bye, and thank you again!!

a slip of the tongue.

summary. how does baizhu care for his junior herbalist when they fall ill?

trigger & content warnings. flu-like sickness, lighthearted mentions of death.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. hurt/comfort-ish. baizhu & reader. 1.1k words. they/them pronouns for reader. this post is an expansion of invisible disability? it's rather visible to me & contains vaguely implied spoilers for baizhu's story quest.

author's thoughts. hello lovely!!! thank youu <3 i am slowly collecting people that like this series like how i collect shiny rocks. its great to get a request related to it. i hold this series very dearly, so please (and this goes for everyone reading this!) never be shy to send thoughts about it or requests related to it. anyway, i love catering to aroace folk, you all are so special to me. im on the aro spectrum myself, so i get it. i know from experience that it can be super frustrating looking for fanfic content that's non-romantic. please remember to take care of yourself! i totally understand the feeling of needing to finish final assignments while being sick. me and you are in the exact same boat LMAO... my requests are always open btw! ive no intention of ever closing them. in the end, i went with our poor reader being sick rather than having flare ups, since i already briefly touched on that idea in employee benefits.

how does baizhu care for his junior herbalist when they're sick and out of commission?

baizhu is most often the first to know when they're sick or otherwise unwell. he's so impossibly attentive to their bodily condition, simply because their health is partially his responsibility. he's their teacher. what kind of mentor would neglect to take care of their apprentice? a bad one, that's what kind.

(he also feels somewhat indebted to them—even though they're chronically ill, they're always doing anything they can to help him recover after his "secret art" treatments. even though he's the doctor, they've helped care for him on more than one occasion. he has to return the favor whenever he can. just because he's older doesn't mean he gets to freely take advantage of their kindness.)

if he's not the first to know, he's the second, because the only instance where he wouldn't know first is if they woke up ill at home.

he'll always end up being the second to know, at the very least. someone will inform him of their condition, whether that be a parent or a sibling or another family member. sometimes a friend of theirs may tell him, such as xingqiu, chongyun, hu tao, or xiangling.

in hu tao's case... she may be distrustful of him, but she does tell him when they aren't well. [name] is a childhood friend of hers. she cares about their health and, surprisingly, doesn't want to put them in the ground just yet!

even though she dreads the path they've chosen to walk down... she still cares for them, very much so.

(junior herbalist!reader's lore drop is finally here?!?!?)

regardless of how baizhu finds out, they'll end up being cared for at the pharmacy.

though he could prescribe them medication and let them be taken care of at home...

he often wants to care for them himself.

gui has asked why in the past, and baizhu really has never had a good answer for him.

he's really not sure why he wants to be the one to monitor them. perhaps it's because it gives him a sense of calmness and reassures him that they're recovering well.

after all, if their condition were to rapidly decline for any reason... he could fix it.

(to some others, his concern might seem overprotective. unnecessary. however, something as simple as the flu has been known to take lives. he worries that, because of their chronic illness, they may be more susceptible to a severe case than others are.)

he has the means to save them if something like that were to happen, and undoubtedly, the life of his sweet and kind apprentice is one that deserves to be saved and protected.

perhaps it's also because it seems to put qiqi at ease; baizhu's noticed that she gets fidgety in [name]'s absence during work hours, but when they're ill and being cared for at the pharmacy, she functions very well and often even remembers to check on them herself.

sometimes when they have a fever, qiqi may sit by their side for minutes at a time and just press her little cold hands on their forehead to cool them off. she also ensures that they stay hydrated.

both baizhu and gui find this behavior very endearing. qiqi cares deeply for her big sibling (despite the fact that she's technically older...). her bond with them is something very special and sweet to bear witness to.

bubu pharmacy's work environment is familial and tightly knit by nature, so it isn't too hard to imagine that something would feel wrong if one of the four herbalists were gone for whatever reason. even those who don't work there are affected by the absence of one or more of the pharmacists.

overall, baizhu takes very good care of them when they fall ill.

he monitors them closely, hand-crafts their medicine depending on what they need, makes sure that their fluid intake is maintained...

he dotes on them tbh.

"Ugh..." they groaned, blearily blinking up at their mentor. Baizhu's hand against the feverish skin of their forehead was cold; they couldn't help but lean into the gentle touch. "Bàba?"

He didn't point it out. He hardly even acknowledged their words, as if he were somehow used to it. He only smiled, hand stroking tenderly over their disheveled hair, taming the defiant strands no doubt caused by restless sleep. "So sorry to wake you, dear."

Even Changsheng was quiet—she only hummed thoughtfully from her place around Baizhu's neck. Normally, she'd find something to tease them about (usually because they started it!), but now... she seemed to know that it just wasn't right to tease them in their hazy state of mind.

Gui was quiet, too. He was surprised. He had never heard them address their mentor such an... informal way, let alone with familial terms. He did once briefly think that the dynamic they had with Baizhu was awfully family-like, but...

It was still unexpected.

"Come, now. It's time to take your medicine again, and then you can go back to sleep, okay?"

Gui watched, still silent, as they hummed in absentminded acknowledgement, rubbing their eyes ever so slightly. It didn't seem to help them come to at all; their gaze was still distant and unfocused and they didn't even realize how they addressed the doctor. If they did... they'd probably apologize, embarrassed, but they showed no such emotion. Baizhu gently guided them into a sitting position, rubbing small circles on their back.

Gui handed the cup filled about halfway with herbal medication off to the doctor. Baizhu gingerly guided it to their lips, knowing very well that the guidance was needed; they looked half-asleep sitting up. Archons know they were in no condition to successfully do it themselves. They took the medicine without so much as a whine about its bitterness—they only grimaced slightly after swallowing. Gui supposed that they never really were one to complain about it, even when fully coherent. 'I think it would set a bad example for others if I complained,' they once told him. 'Plus, it's not like Dr. Baizhu gets some kind of sadistic pleasure from giving medication to me, so there's no reason to complain. It's herbal. There's nothing to be done about the taste... I know he doesn't like taking it either. Hehe. It's kind of funny, actually, like we're hiding some kind of company secret. Herbalists who don't like the taste of herbal medicine.'

It was only after he left the room with the doctor that he pointed it out:

"They called you bàba."

"Hm?" Baizhu hummed, turning to Gui. "Oh. Yes... [Name] has done it quite a few times, actually, whether that be because of fever delirium or a slip of the tongue. I don't mind it. It only means that they feel safe enough to be vulnerable here. Qiqi has done it a few times, as well. Those two are only children, so... it is to be expected."

Gui then smiled, nodding. "It's cute."

Baizhu couldn't help but agree, his lips tilting upwards into a little smile himself. "It is."

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

[lemonhemlock]

so, i'm going through your anti team black tag and living my best life, but one post in particular that you made got me thinking.

“george made damn sure rhaenyra’s bloodline sat on the throne at the end bc, if the hightowers won, house targaryen would have been reformed, and he couldn’t kill them all off at the end of the main series”

i'm pretty sure this might've just been a joke, but it makes me curious. do you think something like a targaryen reformation would be possible, hypothetically speaking? i certainly wouldn't mind it in a "greens win" AU scenario, but that's just me. i wanna know if anyone else sees potential in this. 💚💚💚

Hello, yes, this was mostly a joke, as it happens. 😅 (anon is referring to this post) To introduce another lengthy parenthesis, I remember at the time that some of the reactions to that post were in the range for "why doesn't anyone understand that the Hightowers are also feudal lords vying for their own interests and not some great reformists out to save Westeros", which... Listen. 😄 To put equitably, this fandom has a considerable issue with knowing when to level criticism and when to just treat banter as lighthearted horsing around and not take it too seriously. Something which even I'm not exempt from, I don't think. 🤷‍♀️

So, in the interest of making a meme, that post was kind of half-true in that it simplified a more nuanced concept (that was never an avenue that the author decided to explore anyway) for the sake of humour. I have, in the past, detailed my thoughts on House Hightower and what I think is their role in the wider narrative. This is based on the information we have on them presently. If I'm wrong, then I'm wrong. Who knows, maybe Lord Leyton and Melara plan on blowing Oldtown up for shits and giggles. We don't have to guess everything correctly - another aspect this community struggles with in their fandom wars and obsession with having the most correct, morally pure take.

Regardless, yes, the Hightowers obviously are a privileged family at the top of the social food chain, benefitting from the exploitation awarded by feudalism - a political-economic system based on vast inequality. Therefore, any type of reform they might be willing to undertake will be limited and not really something that significantly changes the status-quo. Just like the beloved, fan-favourite, and mostly confirmed "winners" - the Starks. A third element that our fandom has trouble accepting is the concept of incremental change. I feel like it would basically be a truism to point out that incremental change has been the most reliable vector of socio-economic evolution throughout human history. So, bad news for them, I suppose, but any superficial study of history will reveal that feudalism hardly collapsed overnight. Which leads us back to the idea that any small change, no matter how limited, does matter in the long run, because, as time passes, it will be compounded with another small change and so on.

Anyway, coming back to the question. Would Targaryen reformation be possible? Certainly! GRRM could have made up any story he wanted. Anything is possible if you plan for it and it makes sense within your worldbuilding. As it stands, the Targaryens are foreigners with a questionable culture, hailing from a land that used to engage in practices that even the feudal Westerosi found backwards, distasteful, barbaric or immoral: slavery, human sacrifice, incest, great feats of violence such as pillaging and conquering neighbouring lands for the sake of feeding their population to their volcano gods etc. The Targaryens also have fire-breathing monsters that, while not exactly enough all the time to prevent any rebellions from happening, are weapons that no one else has access to and that can cause a great deal of damage that no one else can replicate.

So, in order to "reform" and integrate, they would need to renounce all that. They would need to do it the traditional way. They do some of the work, but never go all the way. They accept the main religion of the land, but they don't let go of inter-marrying, because they don't want to lose their access to dragons. There are attempts to integrate, but, by the time of the events of the main series, they have returned to incest. Funnily enough, Aegon V plays a role in both - he marries outside of the family and has no dragons left, but his succeeding son and daughter marry each other and, eventually, Aegon decides that bringing back dragons is not such a bad idea after all. I do think that the symbolic weight of Daenerys having both her parents and her grandparents as brother-sister sets is laying the "dragon blood" metaphor thick - and that it holds more magical weight than any mathematical calculation of her actual watered-down Targaryen DNA.

In any such scenario where GRRM decided to go down a Targaryen reformation path, IMO it would have been thematically-relevant to ease into it via a marriage alliance with one of the oldest families in Westeros - a well-respected, rich house that also has close links to both the only centre of higher education and the main religious organization in the land. Hence the meme. :) But it doesn't last and the Targaryens go back to their dastardly ways eventually, that's the point of them in the story, because the author chose it to be the point.

[satans-bf]

NSFW Alphabet - Satan

Hey! This is a new OM! blog that I made to encourage myself to write more often, so I figured a good first post might be the NSFW alphabet I wrote for Satan last month. It shouldn't need to be said, but...

‼️MINORS DNI‼️

A: Aftercare (What are they like afterwards?)

He’s very sweet. He’ll praise you a lot and tell you how much he loves you, and he’s fairly affectionate afterwards. If he scratched or bit you or anything, he’ll look over you to make sure you’re okay and take care of anything that needs it, and he’ll help you get cleaned up. While not normally very cuddly compared to some of the other brothers, he wants after-sex cuddles.

B: Body (What’s their favourite body part or parts of their partner’s? What is their partner’s favourite body part or parts of theirs?)

He likes your hands! You can tell a lot about a person from their hands and the subtleties of them from person to person are individual and unique. He also loves to have your hands on him—he finds it similarly intimate. For the same reasons, he also likes your eyes; I know these are supposed to be sexual headcanons, but I imagine Satan is a very romantic kind of person and that sexuality is very tied to romance for him.

C: Cum (What do they do with it?)

He likes to cum inside you; it’s romantic to him. Whether it’s ass, pussy, or mouth doesn’t really matter. (Of course, that’s just what he likes, and he won’t if you don’t want him to; your stomach is his second favourite place, and that part goes both ways if it's you finishing on him.)

D: Dirty Secret (What’s their dirty secret, if they have one?)

I honestly can’t really think of a dirty secret he’d have... however! Consider this: he is absolutely not a piercings kind of guy. However, if you planted the idea, he might eventually be interested in the idea of getting a Prince Albert or something like that for you. Since it wouldn’t affect his outward appearance, and no one would know about it but you, if you brought up the idea, he would think about it every so often. It’d be very intimate to him knowing that not only do only the two of you know about it, it also heightens the pleasure you both get. But this is very much an, “if you brought up the idea, expressed interest, and gave him enough time to think about it” kind of thing. He wouldn't do it of his own accord; it just wouldn't interest him.

E: Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s not very experienced, so you’d have to be patient with him. That said, if you’re willing to be patient with him, show him some things, and explore some stuff with him, once he’s comfortable with you he might surprise you with some of the things he’s into.

F: Favourite Position (What’s their favourite position?)

His favourite positions are where he can see your face while he takes you, so probably missionary or cowgirl. And yes, he’s a top—regardless of what you have, I can’t see him being comfortable with being penetrated—but he’s not necessarily dominant. He’s just as eager to be flat on his back panting and moaning while you ride him as he is to have you on your back with your legs wrapped around him. If you're not into being penetrated either, that's okay too—he really likes oral.

G: Goofy (Are they more serious or humorous during sex?)

He’s definitely more serious, but he can be pretty... playful? I wouldn’t call him goofy, but sex with him can feel like a game, in a good way. I feel like lighthearted and whimsical are probably better words to describe it than humorous is. I can see him laughing during sex, but between serious and goofy, I'd say serious is more accurate.

H: Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes?)

Not that he grows much hair down there to begin with, but he keeps it very neat! It wouldn't match, but he shaves it anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.

I: Intimacy (How romantic are they during the moment?)

Usually, it’s pretty romantic with him. He’s a hopeless romantic and that informs a lot of the way he tends to see sex; he’s the love-making sort of type. He’s the type to hold your hands, kiss you, nuzzle you, keep his arms around you during sex, etc. That said, he has a wilder side too, and can definitely get into less romantic and more physical moods.

J: Jack Off (How often do they jack off? Do they do it at all?)

He does, but he wouldn’t be able to admit to it if you asked. I wouldn’t say he does it infrequently either; his sex drive is higher than you’d expect it to be, and if anyone found out he’d probably die from embarrassment. Also, because of that, I imagine it’s as much for everyone else as it is for him—as the Avatar of Wrath, I don’t imagine a sexually frustrated Satan is anything that anyone wants to deal with, including him. Precautionary measures as it were.

K: Kink (How many kinks do they have?)

He’s got a few kinks; although he’s perfectly happy be pretty vanilla with you most of the time, if you’re willing and interested in trying some kinks, there’s some he’ll go wild for and would even make a regular part of your sex life if you wanted. Pet play is definitely one of them; he loves cat ears, tail anal plugs, those paw pad thigh high socks…and he’s into either of you wearing them. He’d love to see you in it, but he’d also love to be a pretty little kitty himself, and if you want to do it together? You’ll get to see his wilder side, it'll be one of the rare times he prefers to take you from behind, but watch out! He bites. ;) Besides pet play, in his less romantic moods, he can be pretty rough and risky. He’s both a little sadistic and a little masochistic, and if you’re into it you’re both going to be covered in scratches and bite marks, he’ll want to pull your hair and let you pull his, and he loves it when one of you is pinned while getting fucked—whether that’s you or him.

L: Location (What are their favourite locations?)

In his more romantic moods, he prefers your bed. Something about fucking you in your room gets to him; sure, all the brothers like to hang out in your room, but every time you get intimate with him in your room it feels particularly like laying claim to you. In his less romantic moods, he likes semi-public places where he’s pretty sure you won’t get caught but there’s still a slight chance that you could be. He doesn’t actually want to get caught, and he’s not sure what he’d do if he was, but the idea that it’s possible for someone to walk in on him buried in you or between your legs does something.

M: Motivation (What turns them on?)

A few different things will get his attention in particular—cat ears (of course), but also…confidence. He likes it when you’re forward towards him, whether it’s in a dominant or submissive sort of way, and finds it very difficult not to react to it. He’s the type who, if you act sort of bold or cheeky when he’s not expecting it, he will have to distract or excuse himself immediately. He also likes it when you sit on him, whether that’s on his face or his dick, and when you let him pin you down and/or be dominant with you—he can be very submissive, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like being dominant, too.

N: No (What are their turn-offs?)

Bottoming; if you look at his hole a little too long, he will look at you like you’re actively plotting to kill him. It’s very funny but also very tragic because he is so pretty and would look so pretty with a cock in his ass, but you’ll make him cry if you want him to. The only exception I can see him making is for the aforementioned tail plugs, but he’ll only let you play with his butthole if he knows it’s specifically for that, because the desire to be a cute little kitty is strong.

O: Oral (Do they prefer giving or receiving? How good are they at it?)

He prefers receiving, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like giving, too. He loves going down on you and making you squirm with his mouth and hands, but if you return the favour, he’ll barely be able to contain himself. He will whine and pull your hair—he’s very sensitive.

P: Pace (Are they fast and rough or do they like it slower and more sensual?)

Depends entirely on his mood. His default is slow and sensual so that he can kiss you and hold you and love you properly, but if he’s in the mood he’ll absolutely fuck you senseless.

Q: Quickie (What do they think about quickies?)

In general, he’s not really a fan. He’d much rather take his time with you and really enjoy it, but if he’s particularly horny and/or you’re in a semi-public place it’s not out of the question for him to be up for it.

R: Risk (Do they like to experiment and take risks?)

Yes and no; sometimes he can feel pretty bold and risky and in the right mood he’ll be excited to experiment with you, but if he’s not in that mood he can be easily scared off by it.

S: Stamina (How many rounds can they go? How long do they last?)

By demon standards, his stamina isn’t amazing, but by human standards he can last quite a while. You might be surprised that he’s still going after a few rounds, and wonder where it’s all coming from, but it’s one of the times you remember that not only is he a demon but a powerful one, too. He’ll be able to keep up with you until you’re thoroughly satisfied and if you can manage some sort of control over finishing, he’ll adore you if you cum at the same time. Either way, he’s pretty much always sweaty and winded when you’re done.

T: Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them?)

He doesn’t before he meets you, but he’s not against trying them if you like them. He doesn’t really use them for himself, and doesn’t really feel like he needs to. If you like them though, he doesn’t mind, and if you want him to use them on you, he totally will. He’ll think it’s hot to watch you come undone without even being inside you; he’s like, “wow, do I really make you that horny?”

U: Unfair (How much do they like to tease?)

He loves to tease; as mentioned in G: Goofy, sex with him can be pretty playful, and a lot of that is the two of you messing with each other and playing a sexy game of chicken, trying to see who can get a better/stronger/quicker reaction out of the other, how well you know each other’s likes and reactions, and how long you can stand to be teased before one of you gives in.

V: Volume (How loud are they? What sounds do they make?)

He’s pretty noisy. He’ll try (key word: try) to keep his composure at first, but it’s not difficult to make him moan and whine for you—especially if he’s dressed like a cute little kitty cat. He’s not terribly loud in volume, but he is often vocal. He’ll make the most delicious little whimpers and whines, although sometimes he’ll try really hard to stop them from coming out and you’ll get a strangled-sounding gasp out of him.

W: Wild Card (List a random hc here)

I have a difficult time (personally) imagining him as anything other than gay. I can’t put my finger on what it is about him, but imagining him with a woman or a feminine nonbinary person (AFAB or AMAB) feels strange and forced to me, like it doesn’t make sense, but imagining him with a man or a masculine nonbinary person (AMAB or AFAB) seems natural. In addition, I don’t think he’s lacking in sexual thoughts or feelings—I think it’s more likely that it’s repressed and he’s embarrassed about them.

X: X-Ray (What do they look like under their clothes?)

Pretty. Like all the brothers, he’s got decent muscle tone. Honestly, it’s probably just because he’s a demon; they’re just built different. That said he has more of a lithe and graceful figure than anything, and some moles here and there. As for his cock, it’s just as pretty as the rest of him, and big enough to hit pretty deep, but not terribly thick or anything. ;)

Y: Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

It’s higher than you’d expect. He’s not open about it at all. It’s mostly reserved for actual partners, so you wouldn’t know, but it’s not low. He’s a little bit of a whore, but only for his partner. ❤️

Z: Zzz (How quickly do they fall asleep afterwards?)

It’ll take him a minute. He needs a bit to calm down afterwards—not too long or anything, but it’s not immediate.

[chickensoup-4-mysoul]

herculean (drrr x f!reader) - chapter 11

Chapter 11 - Defenses Are Down

synopsis: you wake up in the apartment of a very enigmatic man, one whose name you've grown much too familiar with.

word count: 4,358

warnings: descriptions of murder

"her eyes got bigger they shimmered like some pots of gold s/he pointed at my soul and then s/he took it,, s p a c e - jay squared feat. santana davinci

"............Maybe if you spoke up more......"

".................how you're feeling.........."

"......hope you understand............"

"I wouldn't think you to be above many things, Orihara, and I was foolish to believe that kidnapping would be one of them."

The heat that radiated onto your face would normally be therapeutic, but at the moment, it just made it hard to stay asleep. The brightness greatly aggravated the ache that swelled beneath your eyelids. Groaning, you threw your forearm over your face, turning away from whatever the source of light was. "Now look, Namie, now you've gone and woke the poor girl up!" Namie..... Who's Namie???

Hold on a minute, where are you!?

You hastily sit up, immediately regretting the decision as your blood begins to rush at the shift in weight. You hiss, palm flying to your forehead to soothe the pulsing dizziness. Light floods your vision as you slowly open your eyes. As you gain a better understanding of your surroundings, you meet the gaze of a young woman who you definitely don't recognize. Despite the obvious look of disdain in her eyes, she's a very pretty lady. She scoffs, rolling her eyes and ending the staring contest between you two. Your stare follows her form as she walks off.

"Don't mind her. Females are often territorial when another female invades the space." Someone sits on a seat across from the couch you were laying on. You're embarrassed by the yelp you let out in surprise. It's none other than Izaya Orihara, leaning back into his chair as if it were a throne. You can only stare at him, too many thoughts swirling around your head to say anything. For example: 

Where are you? Who is that woman? How did you get here? How long had you been asleep? Where did that lady get that gorgeous sweater?

"You're silent, but I have a pretty good idea of what you must be thinking. Don't worry, despite what my secretary may think, I haven't kidnapped you. You're free to leave whenever you'd like." He takes a sip from the mug in his hands, humming pleasantly. "You were pretty worn out last night, so I decided to bring you here. That being said, I welcome you to my home."

You pull your feet off of the couch, swinging them onto the floor to face him. He lived here? Inspecting the area, you got the impression of some sort of office, not someone's home. It was very spacious with a similar layout to your apartment, and there was a set of stairs leading up to what you assumed to be more rooms. The sheer size of the place convinced you that it was a house, but the sight of a skyline outside the window revealed that it was some sort of apartment. Being an informant must pay very well. "Thank you," you murmur, struggling to meet his gaze.

"Why, you're very welcome." His smile is lighthearted and carefree, different from any you've seen on him before. Regardless, even that grin carried an air of mischief to it that set you on edge. The two of you sit in silence as he enjoys his coffee. 

"You're...Izaya Orihara?" you finally ask. He chuckles, finally setting down the mug. 

"Yes, I am. You've heard of me." It's not a question, but a statement. Nonetheless, you nod dumbly, disconcerted by the man's attention on you. You'd hate to just sit here and ask questions, but there were so many to be asked.

"Do you know who I am?" His laughter is louder at that, head tilted back haughtily. Your gaze is glued to your lap in embarrassment. Perhaps it was a stupid question. Why would he know about someone as insignificant as you? Informants worked with the police force and the mafia and--

"(Y/N) Brigall." Your eyes snap back to him in an instant. "Also known as that one fashionably dressed foreign woman, also known as the new addition to Kadota's gang, also known as the woman who withstood a hit from the Shizuo Heiwajima, also known as the woman who went on to steal his heart."

Your cheeks are burning as the list continues. So he did know quite a bit. "M-most of those are just weird rumors, I swear!" you sputter, shrinking under his teasing stare. He shakes his head, smiling into his coffee mug as he takes another sip. The pause in the conversation has you reeling, itching to defend yourself further.

"No worries, I'm sure they are. We information brokers have a good eye for discerning what's a silly fallacy--and what's the solid truth." His eyes narrow at the latter half of his statement and you feel as though you might shrink right where you're sitting. It's surreal; sitting there, staring at him in awkward silence. Seeing him up close like this, you didn't know what to do with yourself. He wasn't that different from Shizuo in that people treated him like some sort of urban legend. They were enemies, weren't they? Should you even be here?

He didn't give off bad vibes, per se, but you felt so skittish in his presence. You noticed it, how he had been scanning your every move from the moment that he woke up. There was no telling what he was capable of, not after what he had done with that knife the night before. What would he be willing to do with his secretary sitting a mere few feet away? 

"Namie, would you mind preparing our guest some tea?" Your eyebrows raise. Before you could tell him no, there was no need for that, the woman was surprisingly already headed to the kitchen. You're embarrassed by how mesmerized you are by her movements. What brought such a graceful woman here, to be involved in such a devious field of work? She silently sets a mug down in front of you. Even when you thank her, her expression remains indifferent.

"May I ask where you got that sweater?" The widening of her eyes is barely noticeable. The momentary break in her cool facade gives you a little bit of hope. She pinches a bit of the sweater's fabric, inspecting it thoughtfully. "I'm not sure...I've had it for a while." There's a flatness to her voice, but it's music to your ears all the same.

"It's lovely. Looks great with your skirt, too. The combination of greens and reds is such an underrated color scheme, in my opinion." It takes effort to stop yourself from going into another one of your rants. Her face has softened from the glower that had previously inhabited it. It's not a smile, but there's no contempt, which you could deal with. "Thank you," she says simply, leaving you with your tea to return to her desk.

"Enchanting, isn't she?" Izaya regains your attention. Bashfulness wells up in your chest; he probably had you all figured out. "Unfortunately, winning her heart would be a difficult task...she's devoted all of its room to her younger brother." He speaks so brazenly about her, as if she's not even in the room. "How sweet," you nod in understanding, keeping your voice low in an attempt to be polite. Sometimes family was most important. You respected that. Izaya has revealed his eccentricity in the small moment that you had been there. You could only imagine what he must be like as a boss. She must have incredibly thick skin.

As you begin sipping on the tea(it was delicious), Izaya leaves you for a moment. Peeking over your shoulder, you sneakily watch him search through his desk drawers. He returns holding a manila folder, crossing his legs in his chair as he peruses its contents. "I hope you don't mind if I get some work done," he says, not at all apologetic. You shake your head no, quietly enjoying your tea as he works. Your eyes are trained on his face, taking in every detail; the furrow of his brow, the concentrated look in his eye, the downturn at the corners of his mouth the moment he stops addressing you. The same enigmatic air that radiated off of Namie radiated off of him tenfold. It didn't help that he himself was a pretty attractive guy. You were drawn to him, as much as you hated to admit it.

What were you still doing here, anyway? You woke up in this man's apartment--this man who Shizuo despised, who your friends had told you very clearly to stay away from--and here you were, enjoying a cup of tea with him. What if he had poisoned it? What if there was some form of sedative in it, and the moment you fell asleep, he would kidnap you for real...

"It's rude to stare." Oh boy, you know. It was a major bad habit of yours. You clear your throat in a pathetic attempt to hide the fact that you had obviously been gawking at him. 

"Just...wondering what you're working on..." you lie. It's only after he raises a brow at you that you realize how intrusive that was. Really?? The guy was an informant! He wasn't exactly going to post his work all over the channel 9 news!! "J-Just wondering, though! You don't have to tell me, of course--that's why I was just keeping it to myself." Wow, this tea was really good!! Good enough to just bury your face into the comedically large cup. Maybe if you go deep enough, you won't be able to tell the difference between the steam of the tea and the steam blowing out of your ears!

"I'm looking into this cold case to see if it can aid me in servicing one of my clients." Was he actually telling you? You hadn't expected an informant to have such a loose tongue. Peeking out from behind the teacup, you notice how his body is directed and open to you, his forearms rested against his knees and upper body leaned towards you. The folder was discarded onto the table, wide open for your viewing pleasure. All you had to do was peek. "Are you interested in true crime at all, (Y/N)?"

"Actually, I do watch a lot of crime TV shows!" You're bolstered by your familiarity with the topic. A real-life cold case was a different realm from the fantastical plotlines you watched on TV, but it had to be close enough, right?

"Now that I think about it, you may be of service to me. You see, this case occurred in the same country you're visiting from--at least...where I assume you're visiting from." Oh, he knew. He really doesn't put any effort into covering it up. There was no reason to, you guess. It was natural that information would be so accessible to him. It didn't bother you--you liked to think that you were an open book, with nothing to hide. You had no dark secrets or blackmail material. As you thought about it, you grew less apprehensive. He couldn't really do anything to you, could he? Sitting in front of you, having discarded that heavy coat, he looked smaller. He didn't have bulging muscles or broad shoulders. The coat had made him appear larger, at least by a little bit. If it had been intentional, you were impressed.

What other kinds of information could he find? How much could he find out about people's lives, their secrets, their personal affairs, their pasts....

"Well, I never did pay much attention to the news, so I don't know much about real cases, but I don't mind trying." Now that you thought about it, you had never sat down and watched the news. Your father never had cable TV on in the house and you always watched your shows through streaming services.

"How about the Three of a Kind Murders? That sound familiar?" He's retrieved the folder now, sifting through the different materials it held. You shake your head no, already sensing that you wouldn't be as helpful as you'd hoped. "That's quite alright. I'll give you some background. Four years ago, January 25th, four families lost their daughters.  It was in a wealthy, upstanding part of town, so of course, everyone was horrified. The case even gained traction at a national level. However, the culprit has yet to be found."

He described it so matter-of-factly, yet it still sent a chill down your spine. To an extent, you could handle such gruesome topics in TV shows, but the idea that this was a real event--a recent one at that--rubbed you the wrong way. Even so, curiosity ate away at you, and you found yourself growing more interested in the event. "Is it certain that they were murders? And why the name Three of a Kind??"

"Oh yes, it's a fact that the girls were murdered. In fact, the name Three of a Kind refers to how they were all killed in different ways. A bit morbid if you ask me."

"And how is that?" His eyebrow raises once more. You shrink in your seat, embarrassed by how eagerly you had asked the question. "Th-that is....how did they die?" A chuckle bubbles from his mouth. You notice how he stifles it in an attempt to stop himself from devolving into full out laughter.

"I'm sorry, I just didn't expect you to be interested in such grotesque details...It was quite the bloodbath, really. One drowned, one strangled, and one stabbed multiple times...that last one was probably the most grisly of them all. It was concluded that the murder weapon was a kitchen knife from the same house they had been killed in, but interestingly enough, it was never found."

You wondered what the girls looked like. In the TV shows you watched, the victims were always angelic and sunny-faced. When the person lost is a beautiful young woman, it makes it all the more tragic. They must have lived such pleasant lives and had such bright futures. Even four years later, you can feel your own heart aching over it. Those poor families.

"I was able to dig up photos from the crime scene, as well as some other materials. Would you like to see?" He pulls out a sheet from the folder, holding it so that you could only see the blank white back. Your eyes could burn holes through the paper with how intensely you stare at it. You're silent, eyeing the paper pensively as Izaya patiently awaits your answer. You blink rapidly and shake your head, surprised by how much you were considering it. Looking at crime scene photos? That would be horrible!

"No, I'm fine, thank you," your voice quivers more than you'd like it to. Becoming aware of the teacup still in your hands, you notice how cold it's gotten. What a waste...Taking it as a sign, you clear your throat and stand, leaving the cup on the coffee table. "I'd hate to overstay my welcome. Thank you for your hospitality."

"It's no problem at all."

All of your instincts are telling you to leave right now. The man was involved in a whole different world that you don't want anything to do with. You should just scurry out of that apartment, head straight home, and never come back again. In spite of that, you just stood there, eyes glued to his courteous smile that so distinctly clashed with the look in his eye. Your feet felt like weights, forcing you to stay in place.

You had to ask him something...something that you could possibly come to regret.

"How good would you be...at doing background checks...l-like learning about a person's history?" It's hard to word such an odd request correctly. The man hums, leaning back in his chair and scratching his chin.

"Well, it depends on just how well-hidden that person's history is. I will say, though, that I'm such a trusted source for a reason." I've been told otherwise, but okay.

"Would it be possible...I mean yeah, I guess it would--to do one of those...c-could you do one on me?" Topics regarding your past quickly became a sore subject in your household. Whenever you tried to bring it up and ask anything about it, your father would get oh so sad. You assumed it was remorse that he couldn't have done anything to save you or your memory, and mentioning the past was only a bitter reminder. As a result, you seized questioning any further for the sake of your father's mental health. That didn't mean that every moment you spent in the dark wasn't plagued with incessant curiosity. It was too painful for Father to tell you and that was fine--you would just need to find out another way...

"Now, why would you need me to do something like that?" he laughs, way too relaxed for your liking. This was business now.

"As long as everything goes well, you should be able to find that out." You find it in you to be more assertive. "I'm willing to pay whatever you require."

The intensity in his eyes has returned as he stares you down. You couldn't help but feel as though he was daring you, like you wouldn't follow through with the arrangement. He was underestimating you. Now more determined, you return his gaze head-on. "Well?"

"I'm not one to turn down business. I'll tell you what, I'll see what I can find and you come back in a night or so. We'll discuss your payment then."

That was easy. So much easier than you expected, that you don't know what else to say. It takes every muscle in your body not to thank him. He wasn't doing you a favor. You were going to pay him. This was business. Instead, you simply nod for closure. Now, your feet are ready to do their jobs, carrying you to the front door. It feels odd, silently making an exit, so you turn back to the other two in the room. Your gaze flickers between him and Namie, who actually bothers to look up at you from her computer. 

"G-Good day," you stammer, before hurrying out the door because wow 'good day'????? You were doomed. Truly.

...

Taro Tanaka: I've seen tons more Yellow Scarves hanging around lately.... Kanra: Me too! Kanra: With all that bright yellow, they're so much easier to spot than the Dollars! Sora: Something tells me they don't mind that... Setton: Yeah, they've been around for a while. Setton: But lately they seem kinda different! Sora: Different, huh? Taro Tanaka: What do you mean? Setton: I can't say for sure Setton: Something has clearly changed though... Setton: I guess.... Setton: It seems like this is the most violent that they've ever been.

Resting your chin in your hand, you ponder the meaning behind Setton's message. It makes sense. After all, the Yellow Scarves hadn't been much of an issue when you first came to Ikebukuro. They had only made a resurgence just recently. A shudder racks your body as you recall the previous night's events, how the man Horada had threatened you in such a disgusting manner.

Saika has entered the chat.

Taro Tanaka: Oh hey there, Saika! How are ya? Sora: Hello, Saika! Kanra: Greetings! Setton: Welcome! Saika: Hi, everyone Saika: Um, I'm sorry... Taro Tanaka: What are you sorry for? Kanra: It's easy to catch a virus when you're so new to the net. Kanra: That's what caused all of that rambling before, right? Kanra: It's not like you could help it! Sora: Yes, no worries.

You had to force yourself to believe such an easy explanation. Of course, this Saika was acting completely different from the one that had appeared before. However, the way it had talked so specifically, especially about you and Shizuo, it was hard to believe that it was some sort of crazy virus. Despite your apprehensions, you try to be welcoming to this new Saika. It's not too difficult. Even through mere text, she comes off as so meek and apologetic. It honestly reminds you of a certain little friend of yours.

Kanra:  By the way, Saika, have you ever heard of a gang called the Yellow Scarves? Saika: You mean all those people walking around in yellow bandanas? Kanra: Yeah, those guys! There's a group out there that's pretty similar to them. They call themselves the Dollars. Kanra: And now because of that whole Slasher thing that terrified everybody.... Kanra: There's some serious tension going on between those two! Saika: ...what do you mean by that? Sora: Hey now, that's no way to greet a newbie.  Sora: Let's talk about something fun and cool, so she doesn't leave our sorry asses.

You giggle childishly at the swear word. It was all harmless fun to take on Sora as a different persona. It was true though, that you were irked by Kanra's remarks. They seemed so pointed, as if she meant to tease Saika. Maybe she hadn't believed the whole virus thing either--but to bother her about it? That's just rude. Setton sends a message agreeing with you and you smile. It had occurred to you after the night of the slashing incident that Celty had to be someone in this chatroom. While Setton was believed by everyone to be male, he reminded you of her the most. 

Kanra: What!! I disagree... Kanra: Everyone living in Ikebukuro should know this!! I mean, the Slasher's still out there somewhere... Kanra: Both the Yellow Scarves and the Dollars have people that got hit! Kanra: And each side is completely convinced that the other group is behind it all! Sora: Eh, I think you're exaggerating as always, Kanra Taro Tanaka: Yeah, it doesn't seem to me like the Dollars are making a big deal about it. Taro Tanaka: Everyone's just confused because neither side knows each other.

You huff as Kanra continues her antics, raving about rising tensions and gang wars. Really, did this woman have any tact at all? She was a friend, you suppose, but you find her obsession with gossip to be utterly distasteful. It was her that had started the chat in the first place, though, so there wasn't much that you could do about it. There's a brief pause in the influx of messages before Saika breaks the silence. However, there's something about her message that's strange to you.

Saika: Okay, thanks for the tip.

What did she mean by that? Was she thanking Kanra for giving her that information? Weird... After Setton and Saika turn in for the night, the conversation seems to die down, so you take your leave as well. You roll backward in your desk chair, sighing in annoyance. Kanra always found a way to say things that made your head hurt. Like, of course tensions were rising, we all know that, no need to make a big deal about it! Really, you were all wound up at the reminder of the men who had attacked you. After all, nothing was stopping them from coming at you a second time. It was a miracle you had even gotten out of it the first time!

You had been in Ikebukuro for a month and you had already been attacked two times--three if you count Shizuo's lovely street sign of death. At this rate, you were gonna be on the back of a milk carton by November. Oddly enough, the apparent danger that came with living in the city didn't deter your enthusiasm towards it. On the contrary, it invigorated you more than anything. The issue was that you were walking a fine line between living a life of adventure and not living at all. Perhaps you should brush up on some self-defense techniques...? How exactly would you do that?

You haphazardly scroll through self defense videos on the internet, mostly just to pass the time. As you continue browsing and even watching a few, however, you begin to actually consider it. After all, the probability that no one else was going to mess with you during the rest of your stay here was looking pretty low. Hooking up your phone to your living room TV, you surf the internet before coming across a series of instructional videos. The quality was grainy, indicating the age of said series. It had to have been filmed in the 80's at the very latest. Regardless, the reviews were full of relatively positive reactions. As the intro flashes across the screen, you immediately burst out laughing. It was entirely too flamboyant and definitely warranted a strobe light warning. Despite its hilarity, the video was actually very informative.

The hours passed surprisingly quickly as you embarked on a marathon. Even when you took a break to eat, you sat on the couch and watched intently as the instructor taught you how to incapacitate someone who had a firearm. Occasionally, you rose to your feet, acting out the different motions in hopes that muscle memory would take its course. However, doing them all on your own felt a little awkward. Practicing with a partner would definitely help a lot more--but who would ever be willing to just stand there and let you beat the crap out of them? 

Shizuo, bless his heart, was instantly out of the question. He'd probably be willing to, but you can't help but worry about his strength. Erika would be a suitable candidate, but she doesn't seem to be the most fighting-savvy. The same could be said for Walker. You don't think you could be violent towards Anri if you tried. No offense to Mikado and Masaomi, but their teen bodies are drastically different from anyone who you'd have to fight off. You're scrolling through your contact list now, contemplating each name before counting them out and moving to the next. The search is starting to seem fruitless as you draw closer and closer to the bottom of the list. However, at the sight of one name, you regain an ounce of hope. Calling the contact's number, you cross your fingers that the hope would be validated.

"Yo."

"Hey, Kyohei? I was wondering if I could ask you for a favor."

[cupid-tune]

Hello, I really want your opinion about the rejection of Beforius, and how he influenced society. We learned from Openbound that the high-bloods take care of the low-bloods. And many have the theory that the Highbloods basically cull other trolls when they have a disability, or a mutation that makes them unable to live on their own, and take on the responsibility of caring for them. Pretty good idea if it didn't have a lot of downsides. What do you think, could Kankri be "rejected" on the beforius, what influenced his character in the future:? or he also initially concealed his blood color, and only during the session he stopped concealing it:? If you think about it, then Rufio is also a kind of mutant, but when he grew up, for some reason he hid in the forest, away from settlements, like cities, as if afraid of someone:?

Apologies in advance for the disturbance :ззззз

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW HAPPY THIS QUESTION MADE ME

I've been thinking about this just recently!! I enjoy looking for content that tries to fill the gaps in between the experience of Beforus, whether it be dialogue or fan stuff. It upsets me that we weren't given too much insight into things, but the fun part is making do with what we have. This post is mainly focusing on mutants on Beforus, but I think this could apply to lowbloods and trolls with disabilities just as much.

Long post ahead!

A lot of what I could gather about the culling on Beforus was from Kankri's dialogue, which peaked my interest the most reading through it. In any other instance, I would take his remarks in the intended humorous manner, but if we really want to dive into this, taking what he says more seriously is a big help.

Kankri describes the problems of Beforus as more underlying and insidious, which makes perfect sense with everything else we have. Feferi was the ruler on Beforus, and as such, was likely a kind ruler with a much more peaceful system in place. The problem is, utopia can't really be achieved, no matter how hard you try. What we're seeing is a flawed system, with trolls who, despite their peaceful way of life, still behave similarly to that on Alternia. You're going to have bad people with bad intentions, and they will most certainly take advantage of the system in place because it's so easy to do.

The theory that highbloods will cull lowbloods and mutants the same amount that it happens on Alternia sounds about right, even if their version of culling is near opposite. Mutants are pitied in such a society, and will be treated like fragile beings who are in need of help. Beforus and Alternia are both bad on opposite sides of the spectrum. One cares too much, the other cares too little. I think a good comparison for this would be the foster care system and how much corruption lies within it. Though, I'd rather not dive into serious real life matters like that while trying to talk about fictional trolls, so it's just good to keep in mind for future reference. Highbloods can take in mutants to care for them, and that seems to be about the extent of context we get. We could go different ways about this and guess whether or not their treatment of these mutants is monitored, or they are left to their own accord and simply trusted.

Coddling seems to be a big deal for Kankri, as one of the only times we see him flaring up in defense is when Porrim shows him coddling-like affection. This could be taken as pale or motherly, but either way, it's upsetting for him. Again, this is probably written to be lighthearted and entertaining, but seeing as this is the only time we see Kankri aggressive, I consider it a trigger of his. Touching, in general, I think is another trigger of Kankri's, which might also come from his culled upbringing.

Kankri pulls away from Porrim a lot, seeing as he directly insults the sweater she gave him but continues to wear it regardless. There is sentiment there, but Kankri shows conflicted behavior. Another alternative could just be that Porrim forces him to wear the sweater, since...Yeah, that pant line. It's understandable. When it comes to Kankri and his relationship with his blood color, the sweater could represent his pride and will to show off his blood now that he's no longer on Beforus. Kankri might've hid his color back then, or was encouraged to wear more neutral colors by his culler like Karkat does.

Further into the coddling nature, Kankri rejects any kind of form of endearment, since his view of it is that it feels belittling and condescending. I think this idea comes from the fact that he experienced similar treatment from whoever was taking care of him on Beforus, which he had grown to dislike either back then or came to realize during the game. He's even willing to take insults if it means not using "wiggler nicknames," which further shows just how much he dislikes this treatment.

Analysis out of the way, the theories of culling on Beforus can go many different directions. Kankri was culled on Beforus, yes. He didn't hide away like Karkat, he wasn't able to in his circumstances. As such, he was raised by a troll, a highblood most likely, who treated him as though he were a prized possession. Kankri could've been pampered and spoiled, which may explain his entitled behavior, but this kind of treatment comes with a lot of downsides. His culler may have been too protective of him, not letting him socialize normally like other trolls and keeping him isolated, or instilling this idea that he needed to be watched over, that he wasn't capable of living a life on his own because of his mutation. This could've been a common practice for many cullers, manipulation and conditioning in order to keep their culled troll under control. Of course, this is a darker way of looking at things, but realistically, this is a very likely reality for many mutants on Beforus. Like I said before, the nature of trolls are a constant, and that means bad people willing to take advantage of a bad system. The only reason I'm willing to take this route is because of how defensive Kankri gets about being treated like a wiggler, and why he strives to know more than others and stand above them. His upbringing shaped who he is now, and one could think that when those kids finally entered the session, Kankri was a free troll.

With Rufioh, he probably had a much easier time escaping the culling system. His wings sprouted later, so he wasn't immediately culled upon birth. He made a life out in the forest with other lowbloods, which allowed him to live relatively peacefully, at least outside of society. Things could've been a lot different for Rufioh had he undergone the same treatment Kankri did, but we can only guess how he would react under those circumstances. Rebelling sounds about right, but who knows how far he could've gotten with that?

Rufioh's behavior is very passive, and he seems pretty content with his life as a mutant. He treats it normally, while Kankri on the other hand hates terms like "mutant" and sees it as a more derogatory term than anything. This is just a Kankri thing, but this could very well be why it's a Kankri thing. I like to think the two have somewhat bonded over being mutants in the past, and Rufioh knows the extent of the culling system and its effects. It's a good thing he ran away while he could, whether it be intentional or not. Rufioh's relationship with his mutation is because he was able to grow up in a setting that didn't shame him for it, allowing him to be carefree and treated like any other troll. This is what Beforus should be, or what the ideal was meant to be.

Beforus culling can be just as bad as Alternia culling, in the way that the victims of it suffer the effects for the rest of their lives. Many culled trolls might even die early on, either because of natural causes in mutations or other health issues brought upon them from the culling treatment. Kankri was conditioned to believe that he shouldn't exist, but to be thankful that he was taken care of anyway. If the people of Beforus were under the impression that culling was an honorable responsibility to take up, caring for the life of another, the ones who were culled are less likely to get help in their situations. His distaste towards the caste system and its inequalities is justified, and that seems to be where a lot of his priorities lie, on educating others about that underlying hierarchy. He's pretty ignorant on other subjects like Porrim's arguments about gender roles on Beforus, and refuses to learn more about it. Which, is not a good thing of course, and is definitely on the list of things he needs to work on, but there are explanations. A lot of what I think are Kankri's personal triggers came from his upbringing, though we can only speculate. Stuff like this is why I enjoy digging into canon, speculation and theories are something I'm not able to indulge in often.

But in conclusion, damn.