#it’s weird to just put that out on the internet

[y3sterdaysproblem]

smoke and mirrors - chris sturniolo

chapter three

summary: your best friend Matt backs out of plans you had made together, so you replace him with his brother. the only problem is the two of you can’t stand each other.

{enemies to lovers, fake dating}

includes : explicit language, fluff, smut(penetration, oral, fingering, etc.), angst if you squint, lots of bickering, slow burn

tw: slight body issues in this chapter.

wc: 3.2k

-

The wedding was in a week and you found yourself out shopping with the triplets trying to find Chris a tie that would match your dress, which was just a simple, deep red, slim fitting, sleeveless dress. It was sexy and flattering, but nowhere near enough to draw attention from the bride or bridal party.

You had been shopping for a while, mostly goofing off, but now you guys had made it to Men’s Warehouse and were actually looking for what you needed. You carried around a swatch of your dress color so you could find something as close as possible, holding it up to every dark red tie you found, but nothing was to your liking just yet.

“How about this one?” Chris asks, holding another one up, and you walk over and hold up your swatch, shaking your head. “Too bright,” you say, to which he groans.

“We’ve looked at like twenty different ties, one of these has to match,” he complains, putting the tie back.

“The perfect match is out there, I know it is. We just have to keep looking,” you tell him, still perusing the array of options throughout the store.

Matt and Nick followed behind you guys, chit chatting with each other while you and Chris bickered over whether or not the reds matched, which they obviously didn’t.

“Haven’t you ever seen those pictures on the internet?” You ask Chris.

He raises an eyebrow, looking down at you. “Very descriptive, I definitely have,” he replies sarcastically.

You roll your eyes. “You know, the ones where girls ask their boyfriend if they can tell the difference between two really similar nail polishes? Most of them can’t tell the difference, but women can! So when you say that these ties are ‘close enough’, they’re just not. It has to be perfect, these pictures are going to be around forever, and as much as I wish you weren’t in the pictures, I at least want to make sure we look good.”

“Stop comparing me to a boyfriend, dude, it’s getting weird,” Chris shudders at the thought and you just shake your head, knowing that he wasn’t listening to a damn thing you were saying and is just trying to rush through this store. “How about this one?”

Chris holds up a tie for you to look at, and you hold your swatch up to it, instantly beaming up at him. “It’s perfect!” You tell him, bouncing on your toes in excitement. “See? Don’t you see how well that matches?”

He looks down at the two colors pressed together and reluctantly nods. “Yeah, that looks pretty good,” he agrees.

“Great!” You smile, grabbing the tie from his hands. “Now we buy this and we’re all done.”

Chris lets out a sigh of relief and turns to his brothers, ready to be done conversing with you for the time being. He makes eye contact with Matt who smiles at him and mouths the words ‘help me’ while pointing towards your frame that happily skipped up to the register.

Matt laughed and patted Chris on the shoulder. “You agreed to it,” he tells him.

Back at the triplets house, you’re all crowded in Nick’s room, your dress laid out on his bed and Chris’s suit laid right next to it. “You put yours on first,” you tell him.

You wanted to see how you guys looked together before the actual day of the wedding, so you decided to try everything on now that you guys were both home and had corresponding outfits. You had brought your dress over earlier before you went shopping so that it was ready for you when you guys got back home.

Chris picks up his suit from the bed and walks into Nick’s bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

“How are you handling being Chris’s girlfriend?” Nick asks curiously, waggling his eyebrows at you.

You just laugh. “It’s not that bad, we just take pictures together every so often, but it’s just pictures. As much as I hate it I just have to remind myself that he’s giving me a date to a wedding so I don’t have to hear everyone asking me why I don’t have a boyfriend. A couple pictures in return for a night of silence sounds like a win to me.”

Nick and Matt chuckle, still shocked that you guys agreed to help each other in such an intimate way, considering your history.

“Why do I have a feeling you guys are going to fall in love?” Nick teases, but you just scoff at him.

“Yeah, right. I’d rather date you,” you smirk at Nick and make a kissy face towards him, leaning in like you were going to kiss him.

Nick cringes and puts his hand in your face, pushing you away as you guys hear the door open, Chris walking out in his suit, his tie in his hand.

“I, uh, don’t know how to tie this,” he says shyly, holding it out, clearly embarrassed.

You look around at his brothers and see them both looking just as clueless as Chris did. “Seriously?” You ask them.

“Our mom or dad always did it for school dances,” Matt tells you. “Never really worn a tie other than that.”

You huff and stand up off the bed, walking over to Chris, snatching the new tie out of his hands. “You guys are helpless,” you mumble, starting to situate the tie around his neck.

“‘M not helpless,” Chris says lowly, his voice slightly pouty.

“Oh, of course not,” you reply, looking up at him. “You’re just a twenty one year old boy that doesn’t know how to tie a tie, or fill out forms, or make a restaurant reservation…” you trail off.

“The fuck? I made a reservation for you and Matt tomorrow,” he argues.

“Tomorrow?” Matt whips his head around to look at his brother.

“Yeah?” Chris responds, looking at Matt over your head. “I told you I’d book it and then let you know when it was.”

“You didn’t think to ask first? Chris, I have plans,” Matt groans.

Chris’s eyes widen. “What fucking plans?! You never go anywhere.”

“I have an actual date tomorrow, I can’t make that. You should’ve told me when it was first or asked when I was free,” Matt tells him, finality clear in his voice.

“Kid, I had to put fucking a deposit down for this place, it’s non refundable. You need to go. Just reschedule your date.” Chris tells him.

Matt shakes his head, looking at Chris seriously. “No, dude, I’m not rescheduling. You should’ve asked.”

Chris groans and throws his head back, currently hating his life. You finish up with the tie and reach up to brush off Chris’s shoulders, then swipe your hands down his arms quickly before backing away. “Done,” you tell him, admiring your work. “You know, you could just suck it up and grab dinner with me. I’m not the worst person to be around.”

Chris turns around and goes back in the mirror to look at himself, shrugging a bit. “I’d prefer not to, but I also don’t want to lose my deposit.” He walks back out of the bathroom and past you, going to sit on the bed. “Alright, try your dress on now so I can take this off.”

You nod and grab your dress before walking into the bathroom, shutting the door after you. You slip off all of your clothes and step into your dress, pulling the straps over your shoulders. It fits well, and when you bought the dress a couple of months ago, you fell in love with it and the way it looked on your body, but now as you stare in the mirror, pulling the sides tight against your waist as the zipper was still down in the back, you couldn’t help but focus on all the imperfections staring back at you in the mirror. It almost makes you fully take the dress off and call it a day, figuring you’ll just put it on the day of the wedding and suck it up, but you would feel too bad making Chris get dressed up just to back out.

You’ve never explicitly told any of the triplets about any of your insecurities, just threw a few self deprecating comments out there like people normally do, and for the most part you were a confident person, but everyone had their days, and today was just one of those days.

You reach back and try to pull the zipper up, but you’re only able to zip it about halfway up on your own, so you slip back into your happy demeanor before you open the door and walk out, smiling at the three boys staring back at you. “Can one of you zip me up?” You ask.

Chris stands up from the bed and walks towards you. You’re shocked to see him volunteering without being coerced into it, but say nothing, afraid to startle him back to his senses. You just turn around and move your hair off your back, pulling it over your shoulder and he reaches out, grabbing the zipper and pulling it all the way up. “Good,” he tells you, and you turn back around to face him again.

“How do I look?” You ask the room, smiling wide and putting your hands on your hips dramatically. Chris moves out of the way so his brothers can see you, but keeps his eyes on your body.

“The same as you always look,” he retorts bluntly.

“You look hot,” Nick nods his head enthusiastically in approval.

“What Nick said,” Matt says in agreement. “I’m kind of sad I can’t make it now.”

You giggle at Matt’s words, feeling your ears heat up a little bit. You didn’t necessarily have a crush on Matt, but you couldn’t ignore the fact that he was attractive and his words did have a little bit of an effect on you.

“Thanks, guys. Come here, Chris, I want to look at us in the mirror.” You tell him and walk back into the bathroom where he follows you.

You both stand in the mirror together, looking at your outfits. You scrunch your eyebrows together and brush your hands over your dress, trying to pull it in a couple different directions to make it look more flattering on your body.

“What are you doing?” Chris asks you, watching you through the mirror as you play with your dress.

“Trying to fix the dress,” you mumble, sucking in a little bit as you turn to the side to stare at your reflection from another angle. “I think I gained a little weight and I just.. don’t really like how this is looking.”

Chris turns to look at you instead of your reflection, seeing how distraught you actually looked by the sight of your body in the dress.

“There’s nothing to fix, the dress is fine.” Chris is clearly uncomfortable at the way you’re speaking, but has no idea how to manage the situation. It was bad enough that he wasn’t good at dealing with other peoples’ emotions, but you two also weren’t close, so his urge to run away was even stronger than normal.

“It’s not the dress, I just…” your voice falters, eyes still glued to your body in the mirror. “I look bad.”

“Stop it,” he tells you, reaching out to turn your body towards his. You turn and look up to meet his eyes, your own starting to well with tears. “Why are you crying?”

You sniffle and shrug your shoulders, unable to speak in fear of your voice giving out on you.

He reaches behind himself and shuts the door, blocking his two brothers from earshot of you guys. “Why are you crying?” He asks you again, more firm this time.

You look down at the ground, sucking in a deep breath. “I’m just upset at how I look,” you tell him, voice high pitched and squeaky. “I really liked this dress when I got it but… I don’t know how I feel now.”

Chris sighs and reaches forward, placing a finger under your chin so he could tilt up your head. “Stop crying,” he tells you. “You look really good in that dress. Your body is incredible and you know it, that’s why you always walk around my house in your little booty shorts and a sports bra, isn’t it?”

You cough out a laugh and reach up to wipe a couple tears that fell down your cheek. “Not really, I’m just really comfortable around you guys. Even you wouldn’t think to comment on my body. You’re dumb but you’re not that dumb.”

Chris rolls his eyes at you and shakes his head. “Well, I’m commenting on it and I’m telling you that you look fine. Girls would kill to look like you. Once you do your hair and your makeup and shave your legs or whatever girls do you’ll feel way better about how you look. So, sort yourself out, change back into your clothes and go cuddle with my brothers or whatever weird shit you do with them.”

You smile and nod, the tears subsiding almost completely as he speaks. “Okay,” you mutter. “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it,” Chris replies. “Seriously. Ever. I don’t ever want anyone knowing I… comforted you.”

You giggle at his words and watch as he turns to leave the bathroom before you try and stop him.

“Wait, Chris,” you touch his shoulder and he turns around, looking at you confusedly. “I need you to unzip me.”

“Oh,” Chris starts, moving his feet to come back to you. You turn around and place your hands over your breasts to hold the dress in place once it’s unzipped and he reaches up to unzip it down to your lower back, the small spaghetti straps falling off of your shoulders as he does so. “There you go.”

You turn back around to face him, still holding the dress. His eyes couldn’t help but wander, taking one last look at your body, so close to being completely naked in front of him. All you had to do was let go and the dress would fall to the floor-

“I said thanks,” you say loudly and Chris clears his throat, looking back up to your eyes. He doesn’t respond, just leaves the bathroom and shuts the door, not even speaking to his brothers before he leaves Nick’s room and heads towards his own.

You turn back to the mirror and drop the dress, staring at yourself a few minutes longer, and the more you stand there, the more you feel your mood shifting, and what started as a judgmental and negative stare slowly turns into you checking yourself out, posing for yourself almost completely naked apart from your underwear. You hum to yourself and send a wink towards your reflection before getting dressed again, walking into Nick’s room.

Right now you wore sweatpants and a loose crop top with the collar cut out so it hung off your shoulders, but you strutted over to Nick’s dresser where you had some clothes you had left and he had so graciously washed for you, digging out a pair of old Nike pros and a sports bra, turning around and smirking at the boys that watched you from the bed, eyes wide.

“What… happened in there?” Nick asks, scared for the answer.

You just giggle and rip your shirt over your shoulders in front of both boys, causing Matt to gasp and cover his eyes with his fingers, though he might’ve kept a small slit between his pointer and middle finger, who knows, whereas Nick’s eyes just got even wider, his eyes trailing over your body as you pulled the sports bra over your head, changing your bottom half next until you were fully changed, letting Matt know he was okay to look.

“I know you’re my best friend but I am still only a man,” Matt tells you, not so subtly checking you out, which only boosted your confidence more. Maybe you were searching for validation in the wrong people, but fuck it you needed it right now and if Matt and god forbid Chris were going to be the men that made you feel like they were going to melt at the sight of you then so be it.

“It’s like window shopping,” you tell Matt with a grin. “You can admire but you can’t touch.”

Matt couldn’t help his cheeks turning slightly darker at your words. “Sure…” he replies, definitely not sure.

“Anyway,” you start, clapping your hands together. “You guys hungry? I’m in the mood to cook.”

-

You had scrounged up what you could in the triplets’ kitchen and ended up cooking them some basic pasta, throwing all the boys’ portions onto a plate along with your own, putting everything on the table, calling Matt and Nick to the table who sat on their couch waiting patiently for dinner to be ready.

“I’m gonna get your brother,” you tell them with a smile before skipping towards the stairs, heading down them quickly. “Chris?” You call, standing in his doorframe.

He glances up at you quickly then back down at his phone before he rips his head back up, doing a double take, eyes scanning over the new outfit that had adorned your body. “Uh,” he drawls, looking up to meet your gaze. “Can I help you?”

You smile and place one foot on top of the other, your front knee buckled slightly, hands placed on the doorframe as you stared back at him where he lay on his bed. “I made dinner. You coming?”

Chris thinks about it for a moment before he shakes his head. “I’m not hungry.” He tells you, looking back down at his phone.

You huff and walk over to him until you’re standing next to his bed, reaching down to grab his phone and pull it behind your back. “Already made you a plate.” You tell him.

Chris furrows his eyebrows and sits up on the bed, quickly getting frustrated with you. “Stop fucking doing that shit every time your spoiled ass doesn’t get what you want. Give me my fucking phone.” He says aggressively, voice a tad louder than it normally is.

“Not until you come have dinner with us. I don’t want your food going to waste,” you pout, both hands now securely locked behind your back, phone held sideways between them. “Don’t be so rude, it’s fucking annoying.”

Chris scoffs out a laugh and shakes his head in disbelief. “I’m rude? You’re just coming in my room and snatching shit out of my hands like a fucking toddler, that seems pretty rude to me.”

You take a tiny step closer to Chris, jutting out your bottom lip. “Please?” You beg.

He’s still for a moment, and at first when his body starts to move, your first thought is that he’s giving in and standing up to go have dinner with you and his brothers, but you’re quickly proven wrong when he stands up and grabs your bicep, flipping your body around. You squeal at the sudden movement, stumbling over your own to feet as he spins you.

What you definitely didn’t expect was him facing you towards the bed and grabbing your hands that were still behind your back with one hand, his other hand taking his phone and shoving it in his pocket. He pushes you down on the bed aggressively, your feet still on the floor but your body bent over with your chest pressed into the mattress, leaning over your back until his mouth was next to your ear, making sure you heard the words that were about to fall from his lips.

“Watch your fucking attitude around me before I fucking make you.”

He aggressively shoves your arms, pushing you into the bed roughly as he lets go of you, glaring your way as he starts to walk out of his room, eventually turning his head and exiting, stomping up the stairs.

You use your now free hands to push yourself up until you’re standing straight again, then use them to reach up to your bun that almost completely fell out, grabbing the hair tie and ripping it out.

It took you a moment to process what had happened, but you thought back to it and how it made you feel, and most importantly the newfound throbbing between your legs. You stand there in silence, arms dropped to your sides, until you let out a quiet and confused,

“What the fuck?”

-

a/n: the tension is buildinggggg yall feel it??

taglist

@liiixsturniolos @madelinesturn @st6niolo @mattslolita @ifwdominicfike @sophand4n4 @chris-hallelujah @sophsturns @ariana2saucyy @045696 @scorpioosworld @byhrxb @vickytaa @taelovesmattsturniolo @secret-sturniolo @theboredknightcat-blog @slvtf0rchr1s @flouqissss @gabri3la-sturns @delilahsturniolo @starstrucktyrantinfluencer @vanillsstuff @sturnlsstuff @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @mattsbrat @mattsfavoritestar @dominicfikeenthusiast @certified-sturniolo @chrisslollipop @noplaceissafeanymore @sofiaaguilaxx @idrk2292 @dylansfavwife @pvssychicken @sturnl0ve @sturnioloangelxoxo @afilmbykay @sofia-is-a-sturniolo-triplet-fan @r0s3luvr @milasturniolo @mattsdillion

[savanir]

A sister's love

The justice league hurriedly responds to a call for backup at a little in the middle of nowhere place by the name of Amity Park. 

The situation had seemed so simple. 

A Star Sapphire had suddenly shown up on Earth which isn’t immediately cause for concern but she was unidentified, so a lantern was definitely going to have to look into it if only just to make sure that nothing bad was going on. There are two planet side green lanterns, Simon and Jessica. So they responded to handle the potential situation. 

Things rapidly spun out of control when they realized it wasn't just a Star Sapphire. 

"I hate to say this but we're gonna need backup" Simon tells Cyborg, "the Star Sapphire has brought something with her. My first guess was a white martian but..." The other one can do some manner of density shifting, and he can go invisible, but they know ways around that. Whatever this one is doing isn’t that though.

"Why isn't this working!?!" Comes Jessica's slightly panicked voice in the distance, "he keeps just going through my creations! dammit, think think Jess" She tried to contain him with a flamethrower construct but he just ignored it, like he’s seemingly ignoring everything else she’s throwing at him.

"Our constructs have zero effect on the other one, the alien, meta? man I don’t know he’s human shaped" 

"What is the situation other than the two hostiles?"

"Uh we got some government agents who are retreating because of the Star Sapphire wrecking their stuff. And the civilian people here seem to be falling under her influence, so she must be human. She's from here, she needs emotional connection to pull that stuff off."

The people are furious, the violet glow around them clearly indicates that the girl is using her ring to amp them up but if Simon didn’t know any better he’d say this was red lantern stuff.

Well there are more ways to whip people up into a frenzy, by hurting their loved ones for example.

There is a brief moment where it can be heard that Simon and Jessica try to get into a more advantageous position. 

Simon grunts, "dammit, those agents seemed to have weapons that actually worked on the other guy but the Star Sapphire used her violet constructs to shield him and destroy their guns and we've been struggling since" this whole situation stinks, he has a weird feeling about all of it.

"Simon this is really really bad, i can't keep restraining all these civilians, we're running out of energy fast!"

Cyborg tries to get a visual on the situation from his position in the Watchtower while he’s notifying any league affiliated heroes who are nearby and available. 

But all of a sudden he realizes there is just nothing, just a big lap of void where the two lanterns are supposed to be, there is no cctv footage, no cell towers, no internet connection. Just what the hell is going on here.

Then the audio transmission starts to violently crackle.

A new voice laced with static can suddenly be heard, "There you two are"

"Shit"

"Is the justice league coming yet? Are they finally going to do something?" the staticy voice continues.

"Stay back you-"

"Or maybe they still need more of a reason to act" 

The audio cuts out. 

"Jessica! Simon! Come in!" ... "Shit!" 

Cyborg finally gets a clear picture with the satellite cameras and now sees the entirety of Amity Park has been covered with a crystalized violet dome. It’s then that he remembers the story Hal told quite some time ago now about a Star Sapphire who managed to put a whole planet into love stasis.

They are gonna need more help with this one he thinks.

Meanwhile Jazz is still shakily trying to figure out how her new pink powers work, now that all the fighting is over (for now), the GIW forcefully expelled from Amity, and the two Justice league people captured and restrained.

Everything happened so fast, one moment the GIW had knocked out her brother and were forcefully taking him away and while she saw them drive off (she was pretty sure she was screaming) a pink thing just froze her in place, She was pretty sure someone said something about “great love in her heart” and then she was… well she was flying and- and there wasn’t really any time to question things then so she may have kinda gone and ripped into the van that had Danny.

She’s pretty sure she healed him, and then things just completely spiraled out of control from that point on. and now she’s here.

She’s pretty sure this is crazy villain behavior, she’s going to get put on some sort of watchlist and then she’ll never get to be a psychologist but it’s fine.

Her little brother is safe, that’s all that matters. And she will keep it that way.

[badger-tales]

Sick Days// W.W x Reader

a/n: I'm so excited to write my first deadpool request i love wade so much!!!!!!!

request: If it’s possible, can I have Deadpool x nb!reader fluff? I feel like he doesn’t get enough fluff in fanfics. Basically, they’re married (shocker that Deadpool’s dumbass can get married ik). Nb!reader is off from work for being sick (like fever or something probably) and Wade decides to not take any bounties (taking this for the movies kinda so he’s basically a hit man-ish??) to take care of his partner. Thanks if you decide to do it!!!

-🎀 (yes ik it’s a weird signature)

word count: 3.6k

Wade clumsily waltzed into the bedroom, balancing a tray of what could only barely be called breakfast—burnt toast, a misshapen omelette, and an oversized cup of orange juice that sloshed dangerously with each step. The tray wobbled as he approached the bed, his eyes fixed on y/n, who was bundled under layers of blankets, their cheeks flushed from the fever. Wade paused dramatically at the foot of the bed, clearing his throat.

“My darling, my sick little munchkin, I present to you... the finest cuisine this side of the apartment building.” He gave an exaggerated bow, managing to keep the tray steady through sheer luck and questionable balance. y/n blinked blearily at the scene, stifling a laugh as they pushed themselves up on their elbows.

“Wade, is that supposed to be an omelette, or did you just fight it?” they asked, their voice croaky but full of amusement.

Wade gasped, his hand flying to his chest in mock indignation. “I’ll have you know this omelette put up quite the fight. I took it down for you, love. You should've seen the flips it was trying to do in the pan—but I was like, ‘No way, Mr. Egg. Not today.’” He set the tray down on their lap with a flourish, tilting his head as he took in the chaotic sight of breakfast. 

y/n smiled, despite the pounding headache and the heat radiating from their skin. They picked up a piece of burnt toast, eyeing it thoughtfully. “You know, it’s not half bad,” they said, taking a small bite. Wade practically beamed, settling on the edge of the bed beside them.

“Really? I mean, of course not! It’s made with love—and maybe a little bit of ash from the toaster. But hey, nothing says ‘I love you’ like breakfast that might give you extra crunch.” He reached over and gently adjusted the blanket around y/n’s shoulders, his movements softer now, the usual chaos tempered by genuine care.

“Thanks, Wade,” y/n said, their voice barely a whisper as they leaned back against the pillows. “For everything. Even the crunchy toast.”

Wade waved a dismissive hand, but his eyes softened behind the mask. “Hey, you’re my favorite person to take care of. Even if you are all sweaty and gross right now.” He paused, then leaned in conspiratorially. “Don’t tell anyone, but I think the sweaty look kinda works for you.”

They rolled their eyes, nudging him lightly. “You’re impossible.”

“And yet, you married me,” he shot back, his voice full of that playful warmth that made everything feel just a bit better. He picked up the oversized cup of orange juice and held it out to them, the liquid still threatening to spill. “Now, drink up, my love. Vitamin C is the key to beating this fever… or at least, that’s what the internet said after I ignored all the pop-ups about enlarging certain body parts.”

y/n laughed, a real one this time, and took the cup from him. “To good health and burnt breakfasts,” they said, raising the cup in a toast.

Wade tapped an imaginary glass against theirs. “To my favorite patient. May you get better soon so I can go back to being the one who needs all the attention.” He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to their temple. 

And for a moment, despite the fever and the exhaustion, y/n felt warm in the best possible way.

“You know what you need? A Wade Wilson patented cuddle burrito,” Wade declared, yanking the comforter off the bed. Before y/n could protest, he wrapped it around them like a human burrito, tucking it tightly so that only their head poked out. Wade grinned proudly at his handiwork, stepping back to admire the blanket-wrapped figure before diving onto the bed beside them.

y/n gave an exasperated sigh, though a smile tugged at their lips. “Wade, I can’t move at all,” they said, their voice muffled by the layers of fabric.

“Exactly! Now you’re safe from all potential threats—and by threats, I mean me, because I’m about to unleash the most intense cuddles known to humankind,” Wade said, his voice dropping dramatically as he wiggled his way closer to them.

He snuggled up to y/n, his arms wrapping around the burrito-wrapped form. “There. Snug as a bug in a Deadpool hug,” he whispered, rubbing his masked nose against theirs in an Eskimo kiss. y/n rolled their eyes playfully, warmth spreading through their chest despite the fever that still lingered.

“Wade, you’re ridiculous,” they muttered, though their tone held no real annoyance.

“Ridiculously awesome, maybe,” Wade replied, giving them a gentle squeeze. He shifted a little, making sure the blanket was still snug around them. “Besides, I read somewhere that the best medicine is plenty of cuddles. And I am nothing if not a dedicated cuddle doctor.”

y/n couldn’t help the laugh that escaped, though it quickly turned into a cough. Wade patted their back gently, his tone softening. “Hey, easy there, patient zero. I’ve got you. No coughing your way out of this burrito.”

y/n settled back against him, the tension easing from their body as they relaxed into the warmth of Wade’s embrace. Despite everything—the fever, the exhaustion—it was hard not to feel just a little bit better wrapped up and warm with Wade’s over-the-top affection. They closed their eyes, allowing themselves to enjoy the comfort.

“Thanks, Wade,” they murmured, their voice barely audible. Wade’s grip tightened slightly, and even though they couldn’t see his face beneath the mask, they knew he was smiling.

“Anything for you, my favorite burrito,” he whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of their head.

“Who needs bounties when I can be a professional nurse-slash-chef-slash-best-husband-ever?” Wade muttered to himself as he stirred a pot of what could generously be called chicken soup. The broth looked a little… green. Maybe chicken soup wasn’t supposed to look green? He frowned, shrugging off the doubt as he poured a bowl anyway, determination etched in every exaggerated movement.

He strutted into the bedroom, bowl in hand, a wide grin plastered on his face beneath the mask. “Soup’s on! Literally!” He presented the bowl to y/n with a flourish, as if he’d just served up a five-star gourmet meal. They blinked at it, their eyes narrowing slightly as they took in the strange, greenish hue.

“Uh, Wade… why is it green?” they asked, their voice a little hoarse from the lingering sickness.

Wade tilted his head, examining the bowl as if he were seeing it for the first time. “Extra vitamins?” he offered, sounding more hopeful than confident.

Y/n chuckled weakly, shaking their head. “I think I’ll stick to tea for now,” they said, the warmth of their smile softening the rejection.

Wade gasped dramatically, clutching his chest with his free hand. “You wound me, my love. This is the finest soup this side of the multiverse. Gordon Ramsay himself would cry tears of joy—or tears of rage, it’s hard to tell with that guy.”

They couldn’t help but smile at his antics, their head resting back against the pillow. “I’m sure it’s… something, Wade. But I think tea is all I can handle right now.”

Wade set the bowl down on the nightstand, giving a resigned nod. “Fine, fine. Tea it is. But I’m still counting this as a win. You laughed, and that’s all that matters,” he said, leaning down to press a kiss to their forehead.

Y/n closed their eyes, feeling the warmth of his affection through the cool fabric. “Thanks for taking care of me,” they murmured, their voice barely above a whisper.

Wade’s eyes softened, and he reached out to adjust the blankets around them. “Always, my favorite patient,” he whispered back, brushing a gloved hand gently against their cheek. “Even if you won’t eat my magical green soup.”

Y/n smiled, their eyes growing heavy. “Maybe next time,” they muttered, already drifting off.

Wade grinned, standing up straight and giving a mock salute. “I’ll hold you to that, sweetheart. Rest up. We’ve got more ridiculousness to get to when you’re feeling better.”

And with that, he tiptoed out of the room, leaving y/n to drift into a peaceful sleep, their heart warmed by his unwavering love and care.

—-

Wade settled down beside y/n on the couch, remote in hand. “Alright, babe, I picked out the perfect movie for a sick day. *The Notebook*. Because nothing says 'get well soon' like Ryan Gosling crying.” He hit play and then snuggled in beside them, wrapping an arm around their shoulder.

Y/n gave a small chuckle, leaning into Wade. “I never thought I’d see the day you willingly watched *The Notebook*,” they teased, their voice still a little raspy.

Wade gasped dramatically. “How dare you! I’m a sensitive soul. I have layers, like an onion. Or a parfait. Plus,” he added with a wink, “I’m just here for the kissy parts.”

Y/n smiled, shaking their head slightly as they rested against him. Wade gently rubbed their arm, his attention shifting between the movie and y/n’s face. Every time they coughed or shivered, he’d pull them a little closer, wrapping the blanket tighter around them.

“Plus, I’ll be here to provide director’s commentary. Spoiler: Ryan Gosling doesn’t wear a mask. Rookie move,” Wade added, his voice laced with humor.

Y/n looked up at him, their tired eyes full of warmth. “I’m just glad you’re here,” they whispered, their voice sincere.

Wade looked down at them, his eyes softening. “Wouldn’t be anywhere else,” he said, his voice losing some of its usual bravado. He pressed a gentle kiss to the top of their head, holding them close as the movie played on.

As the rain-soaked scene between Noah and Allie unfolded, Wade sighed dramatically. “See, that’s where he went wrong. Should’ve worn a red suit and used a few jokes. Guaranteed happy ending every time.”

Y/n laughed softly, their head resting against his shoulder. “You’re impossible,” they murmured, their eyes growing heavy.

“And yet, you still love me,” Wade replied, his tone softer now, filled with affection.

“Always,” they whispered.

Wade smiled, tightening his hold on them slightly as he turned his attention back to the movie. “Sleep tight, babe. I’ll keep Gosling and all those pesky feels at bay,” he whispered, his voice filled with love.

“Alright, time for the fun part,” Wade said, shaking the bottle of cough syrup enthusiastically, the liquid inside sloshing against the glass. He approached the bed with all the seriousness of a doctor ready to perform a major operation. “Open wide, sweetheart,” he instructed, holding up a spoon filled to the brim with the sticky liquid.

Y/n gave him a suspicious look, eyeing both Wade and the syrup. “Wade, do you even know how much to give me?” they asked, their voice skeptical.

Wade squinted at the bottle, turning it around a few times as if the instructions might magically reveal themselves to him. “Of course I do!” he declared with exaggerated confidence. “It says right here, ‘enough to knock out a bear, but not enough to call poison control.’ Totally safe. Trust me, I’m practically a doctor,” he added, giving a thumbs-up.

Y/n groaned, rubbing their forehead. “Why do I feel like I should be worried right now?”

“Because you’re a rational person,” Wade said, “but also because you clearly don’t appreciate the finesse of my medical expertise. Now, come on. Down the hatch! It’ll make you feel better. And I’ll even give you a kiss after. The good kind, not the peck-on-the-forehead kind.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, though the effect was somewhat lost under the mask.

Y/n sighed, their shoulders slumping in resignation. “You better make it a good one,” they muttered before reluctantly opening their mouth. Wade brought the spoon to their lips, his hand surprisingly steady as he carefully fed them the cough syrup.

“There we go. That’s my brave little patient,” Wade cooed, setting the spoon aside once they swallowed the syrup, their face contorting in disgust at the bitter taste.

“Ugh, that’s awful,” y/n said, shuddering. Wade gave an exaggerated nod of sympathy.

“Yeah, no one said getting better was gonna taste like chocolate cake. But fear not!” He leaned in dramatically,“Time for the promised reward.”

He gently pressed his lips against theirs, his kiss soft and lingering, full of affection. Y/n melted into the kiss, their earlier annoyance dissipating. When he pulled away, Wade wiggled his eyebrows again. “See? Told ya it’d be worth it.”

Y/n smiled, their cheeks flushed—not just from the fever. “Okay, maybe it was,” they admitted, leaning back against the pillows.

Wade beamed, pulling the blanket up around them snugly. “Alright, you rest up. Doctor Wade prescribes plenty of fluids, a lot of cuddles, and maybe some more of those kisses—strictly for medicinal purposes, of course.”

Y/n chuckled, closing their eyes as they felt the exhaustion beginning to pull them under. “Thanks, Wade,” they murmured.

“Anything for you, babe,” Wade replied, his voice softening as he brushed a gloved hand through their hair. He stayed by their side, watching over them protectively as they drifted off to sleep, his heart swelling with love for the person who somehow made his chaotic life feel a little more complete.

—-

“Alright, so once upon a time, there was a super sexy mercenary named Wade, and his equally sexy partner, who was sick in bed,” Wade began, sitting cross-legged beside y/n, holding a comic book as if it were a storybook. He cleared his throat dramatically, flipping open the comic book and pretending to read. “And Wade, being the hero he is, fought off the evil Fever Monster with nothing but his charm, rugged good looks, and the most amazing butt in all the land.”

Y/n laughed, though the laugh quickly turned into a cough. Wade immediately shifted closer, patting their back gently. “Hey, hey, careful there. The story’s supposed to heal you, not kill you,” he said, his voice softening. He paused until y/n caught their breath, then continued with renewed enthusiasm.

“So, where was I? Oh, right—the super sexy mercenary. So, Wade, with his trusty sidekick Blanket Burrito—you, by the way—decided to venture into the treacherous land of Sickville.” He waved his hand dramatically, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “It was a terrible place, filled with snotty tissues, terrible coughs, and the worst of all… bitter cough syrup.”

Y/n smiled, resting their head back on the pillow as they watched Wade with tired but amused eyes. “Did they make it out?” they asked, playing along.

“Did they make it out?” Wade repeated, looking appalled. “Of course they did! Not only did they make it out, but they did it in style. Wade distracted the Fever Monster by showing off his amazing dance moves.” He wiggled his hips for emphasis, causing y/n to let out another chuckle. “And Blanket Burrito used their secret weapon—being absolutely adorable. The Fever Monster didn’t stand a chance.”

Wade flipped the comic book page dramatically, even though it was blank. “And then, after a lot of cuddles and some truly heroic soup-making attempts, they defeated the Fever Monster and lived happily ever after, cuddled up in bed with Wade never leaving their side.” He closed the comic book with a flourish, bowing his head toward y/n.

Y/n smiled, their eyes beginning to droop as exhaustion set in. “Sounds like a good ending,” they murmured, their voice barely audible.

Wade’s expression softened behind the mask. He reached over, gently brushing a few strands of hair away from their forehead. “The best ending,” he whispered, leaning in to press a soft kiss to their temple. “And, spoiler alert, there’s a sequel. It involves more cuddles, more ridiculous stories, and a very stubborn mercenary who refuses to leave your side.”

Y/n closed their eyes, their lips curving into a small smile. “Can’t wait,” they whispered, already drifting off.

Wade settled down beside them, his voice dropping to a low, comforting murmur. “Sleep tight, my love. I’ll be right here, ready to fight off any more Fever Monsters that try to mess with you. You’re stuck with me, y/n.”

——

Wade burst into the bedroom, music blasting from his phone. “I heard the best cure for a fever is… a dance party!” He started doing his best (or worst) dance moves, flailing his arms and shaking his hips. Y/n watched from the bed, trying not to laugh too hard, but the ridiculous sight of Wade’s limbs moving in ways that should defy physics was too much. “Wade, you’re ridiculous,” they muttered, but they couldn’t help the smile spreading across their face.

He spun around dramatically, pointing both fingers at y/n. “C’mon, you know you wanna join me. I’m breaking out all my best moves—look, it’s the sprinkler!” He mimicked a sprinkler, spinning in slow, exaggerated circles. Y/n shook their head, their voice still hoarse. “Maybe when I’m not dying of a fever.”

Wade pouted, stopping his sprinkler dance. “Aw, but you look like you’re already feeling better! Just a little shimmy?” He hopped onto the bed, careful not to jostle them too much. “Fine, fine, I’ll just dance for both of us.” He turned the music up a little, starting to moonwalk across the bed, his socks sliding comically over the blanket.

Y/n couldn’t help but laugh, their eyes watering slightly from the effort. Wade looked over at them, his face lighting up at the sound. “There it is! Laughter—nature’s best medicine. Right after dance parties and questionable amounts of orange juice, of course.” He flopped down next to them, still bopping his head to the beat of the music.

“You’re impossible,” y/n murmured, shaking their head, but their smile remained.

Wade grinned, leaning closer. “Impossible is my middle name. Well, technically, it’s Winston, but let’s not get into that right now.” He wrapped an arm around y/n, pulling them gently against his side. “You know, you could just sit here and let me do all the work. You get all the fun of a dance party without the sweating part.”

Y/n snuggled against him, their body feeling heavy with exhaustion but comforted by his warmth. “Thanks, Wade,” they whispered, their eyelids growing heavier.

“Anything for you, my sick little dance partner,” Wade whispered back, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of their head. He reached over to turn the volume down, the music fading into the background as he settled in beside them. “Rest up, babe. We’ll have a proper dance-off when you’re feeling better. Spoiler alert: I’m totally winning.”

And as Wade quietly hummed along to the fading music, they felt the warmth of his love and care surround them, making even the fever seem a little less daunting.

As the day came to an end, y/n lay back against the pillows, feeling drained but grateful. Wade was sitting on the edge of the bed, his mask pulled halfway up, feeding them spoonfuls of ice cream. The cold sweetness helped soothe their sore throat, and the warmth of Wade’s presence made everything feel a little more bearable.

“You know, you’re pretty good at this whole taking-care-of-me thing,” y/n said, their voice still raspy but filled with affection. Wade’s eyes crinkled as he smiled, a glimmer of tenderness shining through his usual bravado.

“Yeah, well, don’t get used to it. I’m still a badass mercenary. But for you, I guess I can be a nurse every now and then.” He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to their forehead, his lips lingering for a moment longer than usual. “Love you, even when you’re all gross and sick.”

Y/n chuckled weakly, their eyes fluttering closed as they savored the simple, intimate moment. “Love you too, Wade,” they whispered, their voice barely audible.

Wade shifted closer, placing the empty ice cream cup on the nightstand before wrapping an arm around y/n, pulling them gently into his side. “You know, you’re kind of ruining my reputation,” he murmured, his tone playful. “If anyone finds out that I’m capable of this much mushy, lovey-dovey stuff, I’ll be out of the mercenary business in no time.”

Y/n snuggled into his warmth, a small smile playing on their lips. “Your secret’s safe with me,” they muttered sleepily.

“Good,” Wade replied, resting his chin on top of their head. He could feel the rise and fall of their breathing as they started to drift off, the steady rhythm bringing him a sense of peace he rarely experienced.

He looked down at y/n, his heart swelling with love and protectiveness. “You just focus on getting better, okay?” he whispered, his voice losing some of its usual playfulness. “I’ve got you. Always.”

Y/n gave a small nod, already half-asleep. “Always,” they echoed softly, their voice a mere whisper.

Wade stayed there, holding them close as the room grew quiet. The only sounds were the gentle hum of the heater and the occasional rustle of the blankets as y/n shifted in their sleep. He watched over them, his heart full, feeling more content than he ever thought possible.

“Sleep tight, my love,” he whispered, pressing another kiss to their forehead before settling in beside them. The chaos of the world outside didn’t matter, not when he had this—these quiet moments with the person he loved more than anything.

And as the night wore on, Wade stayed right there, his arm wrapped protectively around y/n, ready to fight off any fever monsters or bad dreams that dared to come their way. For now, all that mattered was that they were together, safe and sound in each other’s arms.

[a-bucket-in-the-void]

i need a break please

i feel like i’m always just barely getting the bare minimum done

i don’t know why??? like logically i should be doing fine, i barely have anything to do

idk sorry for oakley weird vibes times

[interstellar-productions]

Thinking so many thoughts honestly, about Aaron currently (spiritually not situationally I relate to him, it’s complicated). Aaron so specifically speaks to me because of how (at least with the crumbs we’re fed by canon) he internalizes and deals with his trauma. He WANTS to be normal. In fact he tries so hard to be normal (as society interprets normality) that he actively distances himself and represses any part of him that may lead people to viewing him as anything other then normal.

In my mind this was probably done intentionally, it creates a contrast between him and Andrew (and is probably why Neil is able to tell the twins apart pretty much from the get go). Andrew doesn’t speak about his trauma but he also doesn’t necessarily minimize it. Andrew makes himself big, body language wise he’s very loud. “Look at me, at what they did to me. Look at who I became”. Andrew is a warning sign, he lets his bleeding wounds show and mixes them with ragged bone and snarling teeth. Andrew is telling people without telling people what will happen if someone crosses him.

In contrast Aaron hides, his pain and his scares. Aaron turns everything inwards, shoving it all into closets and under beds. If he blends in then maybe no one will notice him enough to pick him out. Hiding in plane sight. Aaron works so hard to be normal and is canonically known as the least interesting and most normal fox, despite having a murder charge and being a recovered addict. He is the normal fox. People overlook him, glance right over him, his teammates, peers, everyone. Perfect grades, good at his sports, girl next door girlfriend. Aaron is so painfully NORMAL.

It speaks so deeply because it’s so obvious to me that its a coping mechanism and not actually because that’s how he really is. If he was just painfully normal we wouldn’t get some of his more violent or assholeish out burst and he probably wouldn’t have that grudge against Bee. His grudge against Bee is actually what sparked this whole thing for me. He hates Bee, he says that he’s never actually spoken a word to her and even when he starts sessions with Andrew he’s really just speaking to Andrew while Bee is in the room rather then directly speaking to Bee. My little psych major mind (mixed with my personal feelings but HUSH) is just screaming that this whole “I’m normal look right through me please I’m normal”. It’s how he COPES. This guy grew up at least a little bit inside a church (because Luther) and had to hide both bruises and addiction and whatever else was going on inside that house. Statistically speaking there’s two major ways you internalize trauma like that. And I love Aaron and Andrew because their those two ways basically. Aaron is trying so hard to be so Normal that he becomes basically invisible. Blending into the background.

He probably has everyone convinced that he’s got it all in the bag, all his shit? It’s in a sock, don’t even worry about it. He’s got the grades, the girlfriend and he plays a sport. Bro is literally sitting pretty to be so uninteresting that he gets nothing but a cursory glance, and it’s totally part of his scheme. No one’s going to think to ask questions he doesn’t want them too. Not about his past and not about what’s going on in his life. “Oh that’s Aaron yeah I’ve got advanced chem with him, yeah good guy. I think he plays exy.” Aaron doesn’t want people to ask questions, because he knows he’s towing the line. Does he have it all together? Or is he desperately trying to keep all his shit in the boxes he’s stuffed it in? Who knows. Aaron probably doesn’t even know.

Aaron gives me “fake it til you make it” vibes that it actually hurts my soul. This man wants to be normal so bad that he’s doing everything he can to not have to address what’s actually wrong, because acknowledging something’s wrong means acknowledging that he is in fact NOT normal. And he wants to be normal because being normal is how you survive. (How he got Tilda to not beat him for dragging the wrong sort of attention to her)

My psych major mind is absolutely consumed by AFTG because to me they represent all the different ways that trauma can manifest in people. Basically all of the foxes (even and Renee Wymack) are the violent kind. Their teeth and warning signs, don’t get too close, don’t step on my toes. But they all show it so differently. Renee for example is the healed sort of violent, she’s faced the majority of her demons and won, she knows she’ll be able to handle you if you step out of line (see her ruining the nest). Nicky is the loud kind. He’s not the break bone sort of violent but he is the make you uncomfortable kind. So much of Nicky’s early character (Foxhole court) is him giving off borderline predatory vibes. His jokes, his mannerisms, the whole Edens trip. It’s his version of violent. He makes you uncomfortable so he knows whose safe and who isn’t.

Then you have aaron and his whole character is a ticking time bomb. Aaron isn’t normal because he’s healed, he’s normal because its the only way he knows to survive. That’s why he doesn’t like Bee. Bee is a psychologist, her whole job is to know their problems and fix them and the fact he even has to go sit in a room with her is a threat to his overall performance of normality. Because normal people don’t NEED therapy.

Screams into the void, I’m so normal about him.

Also all of this is just my personal little ramblings about a purely fictional character that reminds me of myself as it relates to the topic of interest I’m currently studying. If you don’t agree with me that’s totally fine, if you have different preconceptions about him thats totally ok too. This is just my little brain rot corner of the internet and I’m just trying to have fun.

To the 3 people that wanted to see my deranged psych rambles i hope this reaches you, this is all for you!

[autisticlenaluthor]

idc if it's technically public record, y'all are fucking weird if you're posting katie's CV & agency info online

[thegreatyin]

i feel like ive made yall feel way too safe regarding my gaming opinions. im gonna post ffxiv hottakes until someone begs me to stop

[hella1975]

hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x

[cranberrymoons]

.

[endlessfuckup]

saw your post about no longer wanting to be a phan blog and i just wanted to say i get you especially the reaction to this tour has been very uncomfortable and i could never figure out exactly why it felt... overbearing ig??? but it has been building and the tour leak and announcement just seemed to put a spotlight on people seem to have learned nothing from the previous years and seem to think that now that they're back it's okay to push their boundaries because they're engaging with us again. and tbh i appreciate you for helping put into words the discomfort ive been feeling and it sucks that it turned out like this that the enjoyment of the thing gets harder because of others

I was so so hoping it wouldn't get like this again

The first 5-6 months of the gaming channel being back were mostly wonderful

Everyone was behaving and respectfully enjoying dnp being back as a duo

I've seen/felt it building up over the past few months but I kept ignoring it because I figured it was just newer phans who didn't know about any of "the lore"

But every time I'd check their page out it would almost always be someone in their mid-late 20s who has been around for 10+ years

I was dumbfounded

I genuinely cannot believe people still treat Dan and Phil like tv characters who exist purely for entertaining the masses

Its really sad

[klutzytomb]

I'm posting this for transparency reasons

[skitskatdacat63]

I wish AI images didn't make me so intensely upset. Just the existence of them bothers me a lot, because it's just clutter without meaning or emotion or any genuineness. But recently something happened that made me very upset, and I feel so irrational saying this, but it really gave me this sick, heart-wrenching feeling, and I wish it would stop. My mom was looking through Facebook, and showed me this image of birds that to me was so obviously AI. But she wasn't 100% sure it was fake, only telling me after I had told her it was definitely AI, that she had been a bit unsure about it.

I hate how intense my feelings are about it, bcs it made me want to irrationally almost infantalize her without meaning to. It just made me overwhelmingly sad that this is state of things. That people are being fed this imitation, this trash, and aren't familiar enough to recognize it all the time. Every time I think about it, it hurts my chest.

[hitachiincest]

.

looking at an old sideblog of mine on internet archive n in 2016 (i was v young then) i had a stamps section in my about & 1 of the stamps is a pastel "anti-ddlg" stamp (that i remember was in my mains stamp section too) & at the top it says "dont like/rb my stuff if ur cgl/ddlg you'll be blocked" but like... i dont recall if i cared tht much. like of course id see it all the time in post captions telling them not to interact or w/e & probably posts abt how the klnksters were sexualizing kldz or whatever but i think me putting those was performative bc everyone around was hating it so i was like ah yes its Gross. & everyone in this community doesnt allow them to interact (like, NO exceptions. everyone hated them. there were maybe like 2-3 blogs tht didnt have it on a banner or in their bio) so me as well. but i legitimately cant remember. but it feels odd to see since ive never been staunchly anti-klnk afaik. was there a lull between the days of my klnky problematic fic reading id do & my fitting-in arc or was it just hypocrisy from the very 1st word uttered. or was i legitiamtely swayed for a while tht others' klnks mattered or whatever. idk.

[f1owermoon]

sorry i just. need to rant for a second

[automatonknight]

thinking about how to approach this one guy that seems cool and i migth as well put up a fucking cork board and start pinning notes to it and connecting them with yarn at this point with how hard i'm trying to figure out how to make myself seem "normal"

[kerosene-saint]

I hate being an aroallo autistic person whose sexually matured before I'm allowed to have sexual liberation