#it’s really just me yapping for a bit
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Something that’s been on my mind as I’ve lived in the sunturine ao3 tag for the past week is how the fandom (generally writers and fans) tend to depict and interpret the relationship between Sunday and Gopher Wood.
Now I’ve seen a lot of interpretations where Sunday is reprimanded by Gopher Wood a lot either through punishment, emotional abuse or physical abuse. I’m not going to argue and say “oh those are inaccurate and wrong” because I can see how people could interpret the relationship between them like that. I’m here to offer my own perspective on the matter because I think it’s interesting.
I think that rather than abuse, Gopher Wood excelled at manipulating Sunday. He manipulated and carefully crafted situations where his point of the Harmony’s flaws would always be true, example being, when Sunday was appointed as the Bronze Melodia. He knew that Sunday would see how the long-time resident Dreamchasers would affect Sunday, wavering his belief in the Harmony and push him towards the Order. He INTENTIONALLY created such a circumstance where Sunday had very little power and was forced as an observer and the few times Sunday did actually try to help (recall back to when he tried to help someone wanted by the BloodHound Family) he was punished for his kindness, another thing Gopher Wood did intentionally.
He also purposefully gave Sunday control of Aideen Park and the insane set of rules because he knew that it would affect Sunday, once again, he slowly manipulated and moulded the Sunday we saw in the Penacony quest over years. He made him believe that Robin’s ideals were too romantic, too foolish for so long that he couldn’t even admit to himself or anyone that he likes her songs because of the rules and manipulation done by Gopher Wood.
Yet at the end of it, Sunday doesn’t blame Gopher Wood. He doesn’t seem to hate him or particularly resent him for anything which makes me wonder if there a genuine bond between them but it’s hard to say since there’s a lack of depth on Gopher Wood’s side. But overall I believe rather than abuse, Gopher Wood took advantage of an emotionally well-meaning child like Sunday and manipulated him into a puppet, devoid of any notable traits. It also worth noting that, all of these incidents ended up giving Sunday a saviour complex and seeing himself as expendable/ creating even more hatred for himself, as ive mentioned in my previous post
Of course, this just my opinion lmk know what you guys think too because the power dynamics between their relationship are also very interesting to me
#honkai star rail#hsr#hoyo games#hoyoverse#hsr sunday#gopher wood#character analysis#I heistate to call it that#it’s really just me yapping for a bit#penacony
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Happy 1 year anniversary to Mr Sherlock Holmes! Here's a litttleee celebratory comic from me
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#writing these tags on the 29th of september#which is when john and sherlock ACTUALLY met <3#so there you go#uh once again shout out to candy for letting me talk through some of my processes#it helps immensely and i really wanted to be sure i was getting across what i wanted to with this one#speaking of which - usually i yap a lot in the tags of these bcus i love talking about art#for this one...im not sure i want to comment too much#because i'll be here forever and i think most things can speak for themself#but let me say this one thing#for the first five pages i was drawing john on paper and sherlock on the computer exclusively#and then bringing them together..#uh it really made me think of paul and harry. recording on opposite sides of the world. brought together by the power of editing#its not a particularly emotional scene but i hope ive infused it with. something.#anyway thats it from me#if u want to ask about any particular aspect i would love to yap about the process but i'll just leave it here for now or i'll never shut u#happy 1 year podpals#patsart#oh yeah i will say i did have to take quite a bit of liberty with the audio in order to do what i wanted. forgive me#or dont idc
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Happy (late) new year everyone!
I hope 2025 is a bit more productive than the last
#le ocs#my art#doodle#really late obligatory new year post#I never change huh#/checks last login#tho I don’t think no one was expecting something from me so it’s fine#this thing only makes sense if you check when was the last time I posted btw#I was so ready to just give up this was suppose to be a quick thing but I just kept changing stuff until I like it#but I never did! cursed cursed little try-of-a-comic-thing#but I wasn’t gonna wait another year just for the bit so have it#I keep yapping when I did that enough in the original post sorry good night
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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#abuse tw#i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant#i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing#but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse#i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment#i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him#again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others#if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile#i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse#my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes#so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*
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"A little chirpin' going on here from Tkachuk. He's still yelling at the bench, 'Hey, that's what you get! That's what you get!' And it was Hagel who got wacked along the wall, and it was Hagel that he was yelling at for the most part. [...] Yep! There's Tkachuk, he is loving it. This is his kind-of game." "Hagel obviously leaking over there on the Lightning bench. He laid a big hit on Barkov in the opening minutes of this one."
"Welp, they got the upper hand right now and Tkachuk being who he is, he's taking advantage of that. But that sets the table for tommorow night, and he dun care about that. He will be more than happy to have it go that way. See, he's still—" Matthew: That's what you get! All of that! [?] "He's talking about how sorry you're gonna be. He's talking to Guentzel and a couple other guys. Just setting the table for tommorow." "Oh, man! He is not letting up down there is he?" "Nope!"
"That's what you fucking get. That! (referring to the Kuli on Hagel hit that caused Hagel to go to the bench) That's what you fucking get."
florida panthers @ tampa bay lightning | 12.22.24
#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#naturally maffhew who saw that hagel hit on sasha in the opening minutes and just stared him down as he got on the bench#also had the chirp him at the end as if he personally laid down the hit himself#this is also kuli being very frustrated with the refs for not giving him a boarding call with girgenssons#(to which he did talk to them about it after it happened)#i love maffhew yelling so loud it gets caught on the mic#hot mic! hot mic!#at the end of the day it always leads back to sasha huh#a shame the bolts telecast didnt have a good view of the hit but sasha does wobble a bit#so yeah karma babe#mr i hate tampa more showing how much he hates tampa#i just love them going this is about hagel [zooms out to kuch and jake at the end of the bench]#mr i love kuch but i will mercilessly chirp him too#and also jake#hey babe its a shame youre in blue now because i have to cheer extensively when maffhew engages#yap off who will win sibneys daughter or guy who has found in a cardboard box wet and all alone#thank you bolts telecast for this one i had to suffer your awful commentary but you did give me this so really#it doesnt balance out at all but you knkw
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❤️💛
#soft poolverine my beloved#I contain multitudes as far as trope enjoying goes (Logan likes Wade's yapping AND Logan likes to shut Wade up the old fashioned way)#(aka sticking his tongue down his throat)#(among other things but we're sticking with that for this one lol)#Wade is yapping about something#anything really because he can monologue about anything under the sun#and Logan just reaches over wordlessly and grabs his face and Wade just KEEPS TALKING#and every time Logan comes up for air Wade just starts up again#and Logan just smirks and takes a deep breath and goes back in#he gets some silence for a moment AND gets to feel that endless energy fizzing on his tongue#as Wade focuses his nervous mental energy on exploring Logan's mouth for a bit#you know they are SLOPPY kissers#just drool and teeth and tongues EVERYWHERE#I bet kissing Wade is interesting too because his tongue and lips are all ridged and scarred#anyway I just think Logan would shut him up once in a while for like hours long makeout sessions#and then peacefully go back to listening to him yammer endlessly about the minutiae of the My Little Pony Extended Universe#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#deadpool#kinda wip?#are any of these ever really FINISHED or do I just give up on them and move on 🫠#also dont get me wrong they def fuck nasty too#but I think Logan “Touch Starved As Fuck” Howlett would really revel in just being able to touch him lazily for hours#idk man I'm too far gone I need to be anaesthetized#deadpool & wolverine#deadclaws#wade wilson#poolverine fanart#deadpool x wolverine
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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I finally figured out why I feel so strongly about DRDT characters compared to mainline danganronpa/other fangan characters. (a short yapping session)
With Kiyotaka (my favorite mainline Danganronpa character), I met the character and, he died within two days bc I was binging. Not much time to get attached, but still enough to care a lot, you know?
But with Eden? Ace?? It's been a year and a half 😭 I've gotten impossibly attached to those silly guys.
Honestly, the hiatus has probably elevated this series into what Danganronpa is supposed to be (in my opinion): characters you really love dying.
We've gotten so much time to fall for these characters that having them killed is that much more painful. But that could literally just be me! Idk!
#this is really just me yapping#feeling a bit antsy for chapter 15 for no reason at all!! ahaha!!!#drdt#danganronpa despair time#drdt spoilers#kinda#will probably delete this iii dont really think this is a profound thought
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He has no idea he's like a daughter to me. My middle aged male daughter
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ASIT is making me real sad and lately I have been spending every waking hour thinking about nothing but Elim Garak
I have also been reading this wonderful fic by Cucumbermoon and it is making me sadder but it's beautifully written and very good https://archiveofourown.org/works/30310065 I am very enthusiastic to read the sequel once I am finished (it is possibly correlated to the fact I am menstruating as of current but I cried multiple times while reading so. Really good!!!)
#ferry yaps#ds9#star trek#deep space nine#elim garak#I might be mildly going off the deep end here#I feel a bit silly for being so strongly attached to a character#I'm not really sure why#I've had negative experiences in previous fandoms that have made me try to approach the#m#with a lot more caution I suppose#and I think that's making me anxious about everything I do#even though everyone's been lovely to me so far!#I'm also in general a very sensitive person#which makes posting things on the internet that other people can see and interact with#very scary#eek#just had to get that off my chest I guess??#now you know!
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I've been browsing the Surugaya (japanese secondhand store mostly for all kinds of fandom goods) website, which fyi you SHOULD NOT do if you're like me and easily drawn in by fun merch, augh my wallet, but anyway, I've been looking around the Blue Lock stuff that was only sold at the special exhibition. That's pretty much the only official merch you'll find of characters that are manga-only so far.
And the sheer amount that anything Kaiser-related costs more than any single other character merch?? I could have been convinced to buy a little pin badge with official art of that bastard's face, but not for over 40 euros, wtf! I could get one of Ness for around six euros though. They also have little collectible (I think blind box) figures of the characters and they are adorable. Most of them will run you around 11-15 euros secondhand, some more popular characters like Isagi or Nagi go up to around 30 euros. And Kaiser? Can be yours for 12,282 yen. Which is. Over 75 euros!!
And. Honestly I'm not even that surprised, but it still sure is something to see. It's actually kind of hilarious. Side note, last summer I went to a con with a friend and we saw three Blue Lock cosplayers. All of them were cosplaying Kaiser.
I wonder what that all will evolve into once the guy actually makes his anime appearance.
#i am a bit appalled but mostly deeply amused#blue lock#michael kaiser#poor financial decisions#no i will not buy overpriced secondhand kaiser merch#i did however order a pretty unholy amount of tokyo revengers merch for mostly really cheap hehe#toffi talks#don't mind me yapping i just find it really interesting how popular this manga-only character is
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I somehow only Just noticed how Lucifer's wings move when he laughs in Surprise Guest interactions and I'm. Kind of obsessed? Like that's inexplicably adorable what
I've been due for some wings brainrot for a while now, hoping this one sticks around for a while afhsfjsf the tails got more than their fair share of my attention i Need to be spinning the concept of wings around in my brain at all times for the next three months At Least--
(Bonus hc infodump in the tags bc I have minimal self restraint)
#obey me#obey me headcanons#<- all in the tags💀#obey me nightbringer#obey me lucifer#lucifer#how have i not fully processed this big scary* demon having big fluffy probably emotionally reactive wings#his feathers probably fluff up when he's content and comfy#he 100% uses them to make himself seem even bigger and more threatening when he feels like he needs to#which now has lost its threatening capabilities to me bc he's just doing Bird Things xfjjgxgx#he's threatening enough on his own adding the bird tactics on top just loops back around to Little Guy territory somehow--#anyways wings good#they probably make nice sounds when they move and the feathers brush against each other and they're probably really soft in some places and#he'd probably start purring if you pet them (while you're alone ofc lol) especially the places closer to his back#or wherever else he might struggle to reach himself#I'm gonna be so real tho i think doing anything that could qualify as preening to Any of the former/current angels would get to them a bit-#Lucifer would be more subject to returning the favor tho (subconsciously or intentionally. probably both at different times lmao)#the instinct/cultural association with it has died down a bit in the rest of the brothers (at least conciously)#bc it did mostly just apply to helping other angels they were close with with their wings specifically#so lucifer being the only one with feathers would've probably had that habit/association stay more ingraned than it did for the rest of them#bc he'd be reminded of it all the time#ok i should make an actual post about this at some point i think instead of dumping it in the tags bc jfc-#bc im about to start spiraling into how the brothers adapted to their new bodies and being so out of their own culture when they fell#and etc etc#and I'll yap for Years and also maybe cry a lil--#tldr Preening As A Sign Of Affection (mutual) and it effects Lucifer the most for several reasons#personal headcanons
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YO-TOBER DAY 10....A DAY LATE: PISTACHIONYAN
....Plus a little message!
(The Rongo Swirll was an idea from a friend aidjoekf)
But anyways, just gonna say that as much as I wanna, I'm not gonna have time to do it every day as I'm sure you've noticed (* ´ ▽ ` *)ノ thank you for your understanding!!
Under cut there'll be the usual alt as well as a small doodle dump!! ^u^
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Alt + sketches for my favorite day of yo-tober so far 💔 I love the Tough Tribe!!!
Heres this little shading practice I'm kinda proud of! I had fun drawing the eye :)
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A LOT of squid stuff.....and I still have more. I'll post them on SpaceHey tho!! (@squ1dcurry btw -u-) one of those is a goofy different outfit inspired by the puni puni event fit + his original!
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And timidevil!!! He's a cutie pie ^u^
anyways, I'll be off for now!
#I know it doesn't matter that much but I was really hoping I'd be able to do this one#I just feel kinda guilty bout it i suppose. plus i haven't been having time to/even if I do kinda ignoring my messages#Ghhhghthghjgf sorry for the random vent here basically! It's been a bit more of a struggle than usual w depression but I'll push through +□#if I don't really interact with other's posts for a while#I've been staying off social media except when I post stuff!#If you want me to see something in particular it's best to tag me wahaha#Anyways enough yapping ahdioeof see you next time!!#●posts from yomakai#□ yolo watch 2!#yokai watch#Yo-tober#Yotober#pistachionyan
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gonna be real i hate edgar x miles. i hate them by themselves. madeline x edgar x miles? epic, i love it. but madeline x edgar is so peak. only way to make it better is to add me brah
#i hate miles generally i really don't understand any amount of appeal. he's an ugly mid dude with issues like go to a therapist you freak#i understand to an extent why he's as much of a freak as he is but he's the kinda guy i'd reach for my taser for if i had to sit next 2 him#hate him so bad it's actually not funny.#im gonna say it; if madeline and miles switched roles. if madeline ACTED like miles. yall would fuckin HATE her.#she's already a bit neglected in the fandom ffs and it just. ugh. wtf are yall doing.#hate you forever miles they couldn't pay me overtime to like your ugly ass#[ YAPPING ]
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me bc my favorite fanfic updated & now I don’t know what to do with my life after I finished the latest chapter…maybe reread it all again…😐
#im on a bit of a hiatus just bc my friend is visiting😆😆😆#but I’ll be back to actually posting at the end of the week…#I might do a diary post tomorrow tbh I’m tattooing him tomorrow & I’m really excited about it#& ae have just been hiking and eating seafood so far since he arrived😆😆😆 5 years of yapping to catch up on…#when I’m able to I’m going to a) catch up with all messages/comments !!!!!!!!!!#and b) start to tackle my inbox bc I have 40 asks😳😳😳#please keep asking me things though I love drawinf to answer these things!!!!!!!!!#and also the fanfic😳😳😳 I just got home read the update and✋😐🤨🫨😳#anyways hope you’re all having an amazing week!!!!!!!!
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disclaimer before i start writing this is just kind of a brain dump. so. yeag 👍
it really fucking bothers me. how the mouthwashing fandom tags things. especially their character HATE. ohh my god.
They will make a post that is just "I HATE JIMMY" repeated 27 times. And then they put it in #Jimmy Mouthwashing.
Now, I completely understand WHY. He's an absolute piece of shit and should rot in hell for all eternity.
But it also... really sucks. I dunno. Maybe I'm being a little bitch, but it's always so aggressive. Saying that Jimmy should kill himself and that you want to kill him and all of that.
It really sucks. And as a fictive of Jimmy, it's upsetting to a point where I sometimes worry about making posts about myself, because we are so violent to him.
Sometimes, when I'm having a really rough time, I like to go look through my tag. It's nice. I like seeing art of myself. It's fun!
But I can't, because I know that I'm going to see "Jimmy should actually kill himself," and I know that it's going to be untagged.
Maybe I'm just overreacting? I dunno. I truly do understand why we say these things, but it's really shitty to me. I mean, come on. The general untagged "kys" jokes bother me anyway, but it especially hurts like this.
I'm not mad at anyone. I'm not upset. I'm not apologizing for canon. I'm not taking moral high ground. I'm just talking about something that upsets me.
If you took the time to read this, thank you. I appreciate it /gen
It's not even that you have to keep everything out of the character tags! Maybe just use "#fuck jimmy" or "#i hate jimmy" or something? Make it a common thing, so that filtering it actually does something.
Again, thank you! Much love to the entire community, y'all are awesome 💖 /p /gen
Sincerely, Jimmy 📗🌿 :)
#this is your co-pilot speaking#jimmy fictive#jimmy kin#jimmy fictionkin#mw fictive#mw fictionkin#mw kin#mouthwashing fictionkin#mouthwashing kin#mouthwashing fictive#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing#I'm going to turn off anon for a bit#just for my own peace of mind#but if you're reading these tags#first off holy shit you're still reading /pos#second hihi!! :)#thanks for listening to me yap lol#i really do appreciate it#i'd just like to have somewhat standardized tags so that i can block stuff#because i understand your anger! you are not wrong for being angry! i just wanna filter it lol
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how it feels getting crumbs for the sequel of your all time favorite movie that child you used to pray for and came out when you were in elementary school (i’m a college animation major now)
#so excited for the first trailer#i need to see nick and judy working together like IN a movie#not just bits and pieces from like rides and comics:(#as an animation person i usually have qualms with all these sequels#BUT i really have faith that this won’t be a crappy cash grab#like inside out 2 really the only on par sequel so far imo#disney NEEDS to invest in original ips#but i think a few stories do have some natural room to grow#*cough* NOT ANOTHER TOY STORY *cough*#it’s a whole thing i could talk forever on#and i don’t wanna do it in a post’s notes#tldr only sequels bad- original ips and sequels that make sense and have effort and love put in good#idk i haven’t slept really in three days#truly this movie has been so special to me since i was little#and now i’m an adult going to school for animation#i have a whole new appreciation and love for it like 🥹#sorry SO much yapping i’m just SO EXCITED <3#ALSO DYNAMITE COMIC IN EIGHT DAYS!!#THATS GOOD CONTENT IN THE MEAN TIME!#zootopia#zootopia 2#disney#disney animation#judy hopps#nick wilde#disney zootopia
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