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#it’s not like I’m gonna stop thinking abt the version that lives in my head. it’s just a shame about the official ending that’s all.
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Bnha makes me so mad because it could’ve been good. It had a lot of good aspects. But in the end none of them were satisfyingly resolved so it just feels bad.
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syscultureis · 14 days
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This might me a weird confession or not something you guys wanna talk abt but I need someone to hear this so here we go anyway.
I used to be a system, kinda, I used to think I was a system and was openly a system in online sys communities with system friends; one day I just kinda disappeared because I was(and still kinda am I think?) convinced I was actually a faker and didn’t have OSDD. Ever since then I’ve been living as a singlet, or at least under the assumption I’m a singlet, and have been kind of ignoring every symptom I have; but recently I’ve been getting more system community post on basically every social media and it’s making me rethink everything. Even when I was a sys faker or whatever it is I was I would go through phases of doubt and blamed all my symptoms on other issues, I’d straight up blame all the different voices in my head on psychosis and shit. I don’t know how to move on from here, I feel like I’m realizing I could potentially have not been a faker like I thought and just went back into a state of unawareness because it stressed me out so much to think abt and now I’m becoming aware again. If anyone has any advice for me I’d really appreciate it.
Sorry for the big submission/ramble.
We do this a lot actually, this blog is our own way of trying to remind ourselves the proof we have that we aren't faking
For us it's always just been "even when I'm trying my hardest, my symptoms never stop"
I can ignore them all I want, but it doesn't change that I get stuck dissociating for hours. Or that I lose so much time. Or that I act so differently constantly that people call me on it. Or that I hear others thinking in my head (even if I try to write it off as my own thoughts)
I get stuck with intense "this is not me" when I look in the mirror
When I try to ignore my symptoms I feel like I have no identity and that I'm playing pretend. When I stop ignoring it slowly I'm reminded it's because all those versions of me aren't really me, they're other alters who exist to help even when it doesn't feel like it
I might not be explaining this well, I'm really blurry and think we may have switched half way through and I don't really remember where we were going with this lol
But if you're questioning, research is your best friend. Outside of social media specifically. And also it's okay to be wrong! You're not gonna get everything right every single time, we have been so wrong about our own system so many times it could be a post on its own lmao
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were-wolverine · 9 months
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percy jackson ep3 live reaction
yesss the attic it looks perfect
the voice crack on “hi” i’m cackling
“oh geez” HES SO PERCY
annabeth immediately i love him.
percy’s gf requirements: has to be willing to push him down a flight of stairs without hesitation
let percy understand the horses PLEASE
“i chose you” i thought it was gonna be like ‘because you’re my best friend’ but nah he is just suspicious of grover dang. “i trust you” DAMN HE REALLY LYING HUH. poor grover totally believes him too. good thing he earns his trust back eventually and remains his best friend forever
“i’m gonna pack the best snacks” HE IS THE BEST KIND OF FRIEND
why tf are there lobster traps in the cabin. WHERE IS HIS BED???
“i think they’re canadian maybe? or from chuck e. cheese i dunno” he’s literally my favorite person ever
“these are… interesting”
thalia’s tree :(
when do they tell percy that grover was thalias protector 🤔
“the most powerful being in the universe’s best idea to save his daughter’s life… was to turn her into a tree?” YEAH FR GET HIS ASS PERCY
bro really does not know how to read the room 💀 “she met a pinecone’s fate” dude she is talking about her dead friend/sister-figure. grover’s literally like “wtf man”
how tf did they get a taxi from long island to the city bro
“i’m sorry to hear that” UR THE BEST ANNABETH
why is grover singing… THEATRE KID ENERGY
“our voting system’s broken” hgjfhdhd
BIG OOF ????
the autism makes decisions so hard very real
NOT THE TOSTITOS /j
“they smell fear” “that’s bees” EXCUSE ME? BEES WHAT NOW??
damn dodds that’s brutal
“perhaps the most formidable demigod child alive” i adore how they make 12 y/o annabeth so fucking powerful. like i really really love that they do that cuz ppl always talk about how powerful percy is but not how powerful annabeth is
defeated by shitty evacuation skills smh
…we’re lost in the woods, somewhere in new jersey
“i didn’t even know they had forests in new jersey” king. what.
ahhh i wish they just made them 13 i really cannot see them as 12 year olds
ope it is revealed. GROVER STOP TRYING TO REDIRECT THE CONVERSATION ITS NOT WORKING
annabeth IMMEDIATELY knows it’s medusa lol
thinking abt how sally used medusa’s story to teach lil percy that appearances aren’t everything and “not everything that looks like a monster is a monster”. very interested to see what they do with her in this version of pjo
“and i definitely trust my mom” percy is such a momma’s boy i love it
i hope they don’t make her evil pls pls pls. SHES NOT EVIL SHES AN SA VICTIM. “a survivor” :(
“the gift the gods gave me is i cannot be bullied anymore” yes 🙌
girl really said “it’s not a gift it’s a curse” as if she was there 💀 ilysm but clearly the story you’ve heard isn’t what really happened
“so did i” :( she was a worshipper of athena
“i wasn’t like you, i was you”
ANNABETH “that isn’t what happened” GIRL YOU WERENT THERREEEEE
you tell them medusa !! her and percy get matching “i hate poseidon” shirts
team #trust issues
oop. yeah fuck poseidon.
okay yeah i really like this characterization of her. like a good person with a skewed moral compass. or at least good intentions but not great actions
leetle snakes hiss hiss
annabeth watching percy defeat alecto… she literally has heart eyes hehe
THEY BETTER SHIP HER HEAD TO OLYMPUS I SWEAR
you tell them grover!!!!!!
oh he really did choose grover because he trusted him aw :,)
YES SHIP THE HEAD
“i am impertinent” ily
the song 💀 this is why they are besties
LIN MANUEL MIRANDA? *lip bite*
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spaceagebachelormann · 9 months
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Platonic hcs for Adam Frankenstein and a gender neutral reader that befriends him? hope you’re having a great day btw!
platonic adam frankenstein hcs !
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✧ warnings: some swearing
✧ additional info: oh my god i got so excited when i saw this request by all means pls send more for my classic monsters m.list and/or phantom of the opera (if you’ve seen it ofc) this made me so happy ur an angel. also can be read as either the book or movie versions <3
✧ m.list — nav.
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so like
he’d probably be intimidated when u first come across him
like he doesn’t trust you but he isn’t going to hurt you because he doesn’t have a reason
you probably need to show him ur not gonna do anything before he stops trying to get away from u
and when that happens he’ll still be a bit suspicious
just start by introducing urself and explaining ur intentions and he’ll calm down
he finally introduces himself to u as gently as he can cause he doesn’t wanna like. scare u away ofc
once he gets comfortable he’s such a good friend
one of the first things he does is ask u abt ur life cause he feels like it’s important to know what ur friends lives are like (he’s right go check up on ur friends rn if ur reading this 😒)
he knows he can’t like stay with u (probably) and u can’t stay with him so he gets kinda sad when u leave
goodbye hugs absolutely happen!!
and he’s super gentle cause he’s really strong and could easily crush u
also def gives head pats
erm anyway
typa guy to walk into ur house like he lives there (if u live alone)
but if he doesn’t i feel like you would be going to wherever tf he is more than him coming to u
and he gets so happy if u just show up unexpectedly
like that shit makes him more happy than showing up on scheduled time
and if ur ever late cause u had a problem for someone else oh my god
a) u came to the right person because he’s very sweet and understanding and will listen to u and give input if u ask
b) he’ll stomp that mf like a bug if u want him too
c) his hugs are fucking amazing
he’s so good at comforting <3
other than that he’d probably know how to cook from living alone so he’d like making u food
even if u don’t ask he has something ready for u
and you WILL eat it or i’m gonna come after u 😒
would also randomly bring u gifts as a thank you for befriending him because now he isn’t as lonely and has someone to talk to! <3
the thought of him like getting all happy when u come through the door to see him is making me so happy and sad at the same time he’s such a cutie patootie
this one might take some time. but once he’s rlly rlly comfortable he’ll prob tell u abt what happened with victor
was mainly afraid of telling u cause he wasn’t sure how u would react
has so much more respect for u when u aren’t rude to him abt it <3
if u have any random drama bro is invested
“SHE DID WHAT” core
will think ur in the right literally no matter what
u could’ve done some shit scandalous and he’s defending u
u could probably help him come outside more cause he’d always be inside
just say to him “hey we should go for a walk!!” and with a bit of convincing ur suddenly outside in the woods on a walk
THE ANIMALS LOVE HIM SO MUCH
like it’s so cute he’s sitting on the ground trying to pay attention to 15 animals at once
even if he’s deformed they know hes rlly sweet and wouldn’t do anything to them
also he’d fucking love picnics
like just sitting there and listening to u talk abt whatever
he loves it <3
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kirbyliker12 · 1 year
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What's ur full analysis on Susie
Ohoho….😏😏😏I suppose…..I’ll Unleash the Thoughts all at once😏😏😏😏😏normally you’d need more kirbyliker14EXP(exposure points) for it to be comprehensible but recommended levels are always wrong (this is the worst intro I have ever made
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Ok first of all to get That out of the way uhh the whole star Allies Susie desc got mistranslated(classic star allies!) basically it’s supposed to be like “helping other planets with technology” and the whole exterminate thing is supposed to be just crushing bad people okay are we clear did we get that good (also I’m gonna be putting my Suzy kaomoji between points because I Said So(It might act b me favorite ?? I’m reely happy w how it turned out 😙my magolor kaomoji ᴑ /₍⸌╷╷⸍₎\ ᴑ is close but I think it’s mostly bc I felt proud as hell after figuring out how to put the ears on one line)
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Ok first off her lore basically blah blah Suzy was Exposed To The Internet At A Young Age
Fun(?????????) fact😋 as it makes no sense for Max to have done those experiments with star dream with his only daughter in close proximity so it’s highly likely that Suzy disobeyed her fathers warnings and prohibition and technically caused her own disappearance (why am I mentioning dis??😏ermm aheu heu you’ll c)
Suzy returns after seeing the Horrors and now works for Max
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Come to think of it idk if Suzy even knew of max’s real goal like ik the novel made it so he openly misses her but ?? The novel also made him live at the end so No Im not counting that data in my
Anyway blah blah Suzy feels resentment for max and how either A)simple minded his goal of “unlimited money” is or B) that he doesn’t even recognize her
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Notably this is prevalent in the Japanese version as shown which means he intentionally tried to forget his feelings (in other words what makes a human=human) and then started forgetting them more after more usage but didn’t see a problem with it (why are the haltmanns Like That)
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Anyway time for the main story events
It’s been established that this is after Susie clawed her way out of hell(???) (before magolor made it cool) at like idk 11 years old so that’s slightly less impressive than the average Kirby adventure
Also that max has now lost abt 90% of his self (willingly??? Idk don’t ask me) and appears to focus entirely on money
Mr maxx pulls a questionable rant out at Kirby and tries to obliterate this 9 year olds entire world after losing a single battle but Suzy takes the helmet right after it touches his head(a tiny bit too late to enact the action?? A tiny bit too early???? Is this the worst outcome????Could he have survived and been reasoned with after defeat ???? I still don’t know STOP ASKING ME) and she enacts her famous line
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She was so real for that she yippyd before it was cool oh anyway she then comes out(WOOOO GOOD FOR HER💥💥💥💥💥) as someone who’s been Against max all this time (in other words…disobeying her father…..😏😏😏I can’t believe Suzy made a Suzy reference)
However her calculated plan backfires and as the helmet touched his head but he didn’t have the helmet he gets 99% of his entire self destroyed and now the cold calculated machine decides to destroy the universe (erm…WHOOPS!😂😂😂 susie is so losercoded I can’t believe everyone calls her the Normal Person how do you screw up a plan this bad like seriously oh my god marx and magolor enacted their plan perfectly and taranza managed to technically bring the heros of the lower worlds to sectonia but Susie completely screwed up they should start calling her Losie)
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However when learning of this susie doesn’t react in a normal way like there’s no sulking or sad face she gets up and immediately thinks of a plan to defeat star dream (giving Kirby the gimmick that notably cannot fly for very long without certain abilities and has quite short ranged attacks) then meta knight shows up n gives a much better plan by using his cool ship
As you can see her body language is all formal and cool and she’s all commanding and stuff (her autistic stare has captivated my soul) HOWEVER😏😏😏😏😂😏ohhh babyyyy I was dying after realizing this
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As soon as they fly off screen susie immediately establishes a more desperate pose and language (in like. Every other version I think this is the American version even Europe got it better Suzy uses a formal name for Kirby instead of pinky)
In other words Suzy refuses to show her weakness in front of people(LOSIE THEORY CONFIRMED??????) then at the end she immediately leaves pop star instead of like lingering around to celebrate with Kirby like taranza did or the end of rtdl with Kirby’s chums (u can probably use ur imagination for the possible reasons she chooses to be alone😙😙😙)
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ok robobot events over wooo anyway I Wasnt Sure How To Title This
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Robobot is known for having a similar lore story to Taranza where villian that dies actually lost their self prior to the events of the game and the villian who gets redeemed had a persona connection with them
When we later see Suzy in Allies she appears Completely Normal And Fine compared to taranza
However I really doubt that she’s just FINE I mean you saw during the cutscenes I bet offscreen she’s tormented by thinking abt what her dad could have been and how he ended up and how she caused his fate (ok I changed my mind I don’t want losie theory to be confirmed take it back)
Notably, she’s completely dedicated herself to max’s company even though she seemed to really dislike him at the end(she coulda just made a whole new company)is this her way of apologizing for destroying him ?? A way of making her dad proud ????? Where do these questions keep coming from
While taranza gets to openly grieve and dedicate some time to receiving closure Suzy does Not the whole thing abt planet robobot is constantly upgrading and improving and so on and GRIEF is COUNTER PRODUCTIVE (oouuhhhghgghh I feel like things obtained from evolution that are counterproductive to modern life could b soo interesting to explore with Suzy like uh adrenaline giving you paranoia and complex emotions such as guilt and embarrassment being a side effect of brains developing more)
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No more “girlboss” Susie we’ve advanced to LOSIE susie now 👍👍👍👍👍👍
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haeresyys · 2 years
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Gonna just rattle off some of my general Dottore thoughts + headcanons here
THIS IS KINDA LONG LMAO I’M SO SORRY IN ADVANCE ENJOY MY FUCKIN... MADDENED RAMBLINGS IG??? This bitch has been living rent free in my fucking head for months now and I don’t know how to evict him
We haven't gotten confirmation either way on how the Segments work I don't think, so I'm headcanoning them as at least partially organic until further notice jgksdjgk
Also I know we got that shot of that weird THING where Dottore's eyes should be when his model got posted, but you can pry red-eyed Dottore from my cold dead hands !!!!
(I personally think they just fucking slapped some textures under there because we're not supposed to see what his eyes look like yet. Think Kaeya's eye under the patch)
The way I draw him, he does have scars around his eyes underneath his mask, though I've probably tweaked how they look about half a dozen times by now. I'll post him later probably
My idea with that oneshot I wrote is that, despite his best efforts not to, Dottore is still capable of feeling emotions. Beyond basic things such as anger though he is... Not very well in touch with them. He insists he doesn't feel guilt in disposing of the other Segments. (If anything he almost sounded happy abt it while talking to Nahida bc it sounds like they never shut the fuck up lmfao) It only starts to sink in that maybe he does have some regrets when he starts having those nightmares.
He had countless pairs of eyes to give himself different views of the world, and now he only has himself. But he keeps pushing onward and shoving it back down, because to accomplish his goals, no length is too far. Dottore is completely and utterly ruthless, I think we all know this by now.
That also lends credence to how he could end up playable as well. I personally see him eventually getting a Cryo Vision, as (iirc) it's been shown that basically every Cryo user we've gotten so far has gotten theirs due to family conflict. And when you think about it, what he did to the Segments could be interpreted as him effectively killing his brethren or maybe some kind of extremely convoluted suicide WHDFHDSF it could honestly go either way
It's still too early to say on the Vision front tho lmfao it'll likely be a good year before he's playable
Moving back onto the Segments for a moment, the reason he gives in-game for creating them is... A lot more understandable than I expected. Giving himself multiple views of the world and effectively stopping time for that version of himself. The lengths he goes to in pursuit of knowledge are genuinely fucking impressive, and also go to show how utterly unhinged he is.
I saw this on Twitter first, but Dottore is extremely focused on preserving the past. Even outside of the Segments, there's lore in artifact descriptions and the like that point back to him as well, and though he keeps it under tight wraps, his conversation with Nahida gives a lot more insight into his mindset + who he is as a person than at first glance.
He says it himself: Humans have a hard time making peace with themselves. Wouldn't that also imply things like the passage of time? Growing older, and one's own mortality?
CHRIST I KNOW THIS IS A LOT BUT I THINK DOTTORE IS THE MOST INVESTED I'VE BEEN IN A CHARACTER IN A LONG FUCKING TIME LOL I AM FILLED WITH THOUGHTS™
There's a lot of potential with his character, and I think that's part of why I love him so much. He's just so fucking fascinating to me. Like. I know I haven't done RP shit in a long ass time (definitely FAR less than I used to), but Dottore is the closest thing I've had to a muse in years. Getting into his head is so unbelievably fucking fun for me
Anyway rant over lmfao back to your regularly scheduled whatever
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yostresswritinggirl · 4 years
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hi! ik sojourner's already ended but i have an(other?) idea in case u ever pick it up since i love ur albedo 😳😳 ok so
what abt a reader who is rlly excited abt alchemy, but they avoid talking abt it bc they start rambling and stuttering and stumbling over their words bc they're so excited? they get assigned/asked to go w/ albedo bc they're rlly good at alchemy too, but they end up fidgeting a lot, muttering and stopping just a few words in before their volume rises and giving short answers when w/ him bc they're afraid of rambling (since they do it to think better when alone, sometimes insulting and arguing w the objects when they don't get the expected result) & being seen as annoying or unprofessional?? i'd like to see how he reacts to these and what he'd think!! and how or when he discovers the reason reader is acting like that
it's kinda (a lot, rlly skowkskdk i always have ideas but never write them) specific, but i rlly like the idea!! i'd love to see what u do w/ it if u ever pick it up in the future :D hope you're staying hydrated and well🥺🥰 -🌌
What do you mean Sojourner's already ended, Sojourner is eternal, Sojourner is forever-
Kidding aside, this is too cute to pass up, even if it's quite a lot! Cute Albedo brainrot moments always please. It might be too much sometimes but I hope you enjoy my interpretation of it! Scenarios format! Starry night, oh I'm always hydrated, thank you and I hope you're well!
For the Record
Albedo working with a Reader that's highly enthusiastic about alchemy but insecure about rambling... (masterlist)
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You dealt with Alchemy a year before the Kreideprinz entered Mondstadt, your attunement to the mystic arts baffling and intriguing you every time. During that period, you're not really sure of what art you're doing but in the end, you kept doing great that the people had acknowledged your talents.
Through your own effort and self-study even if unnamed, you managed to put your talent into this art of Alchemy and created discoveries regarding powders and mineral-focused ingredients. It was a shame there was no one to share it to, and when you talk to scholars/practitioners alike, you end up rambling so much to the point that on their end you barely make sense. Whether this was caused by your eaten words or lax and personalized vocabulary over the matter, you're not sure.
Their confused and judgmental stare haunts you, leaving you alone with your raging thoughts and overworking mind when you just want to learn and expand your discoveries to other people without driving them away. Your enthusiasm is great and all, but it's not enough to make others understand.
So when the Chalk Prince entered Mondstadt, blessing the city with his scholarly knowledge and boundless creations, he easily made a name for himself and in extension the city itself.
Before Sucrose and Timaeus, you were called upon by the Grand Master Varka to accompany Albedo and be his temporary assistant seeing as his field in the division is still quite new and you were the only other 'Alchemist' in town besides him. You're both giddy and nervous, like really, really nervous.
You've heard of Albedo and maybe a caught a glimpse or two, but you've never actually interacted enough to know exactly what he looks like or how he is as a person. All you know is that he's a very, very attractive person overall.
"Good-looking, carries this aura of wisdom around him, he's just really charming," were the words that rang through your mind as you pointedly watched your steps, following the carpets leading to Ordo Favonius' laboratory while Lisa's words rang through your head.
Is he really that kind of person? You've heard that he's quite stoic too, but if he's really that distracting, you're scared that it would be harder for you to focus and help out. Honestly how would you even deal with him when your fields of Alchemy are so different from each other?
You have no idea how long you've been thinking, standing in contemplation in front of the set of double doors that leads to the workshop with nothing but doubt in your mind. But upon realizing the teal gaze of another person silently waiting instead of wooden doors, you figured it was far too long.
"Ah, I'm sorry! I was in my head, I wasn't expecting you to-!" You flailed your hands around comically before abruptly stopping, noticing the now confused stare of Albedo of which are distracted by your hands. Clearing your throat, you extended a hand towards him to shake, trying to stare anywhere but his face. "I'm (Y/N), I'll be your assistant until you're well settled in the city. It's nice to meet you, Ma-"
His hand finds yours in a firm grip, a firm shake so sudden you bit your tongue back, "Albedo, Kreideprinz of the Art of Kemia, but just Albedo is fine, I'll be under your care."
Albedo finds it intriguing and surprisingly not that distracting whenever you talk to yourself or to the ingredients whenever you so much as feel the slightest frustration. "Ugh, this Zinc powder is so stubborn, clingy," you angrily mumbled under your breath as you washed off the blue powder that spilled at your hand, "So, so clingy." Since you're facing the sink, you couldn't see the way he was holding himself from laughing audibly at your amusing antics.
You seemed lively and open, is what Albedo thought when he first met you. But this observation soon shattered when he kept getting hanged upon your abrupt stops when delving into your field, something he was really irked about the first few times. Your art of Alchemy is much different from his and he's wishing that you'd clarify and expound all your learnings to him, but in the end, you somehow step back everytime your words became lengthy.
Are you hiding something? Did you not want him to learn the same arts as yours? If those were the case, he couldn't bring himself to ask a simple question such ad why. Every time it crosses his mind, it brings a purse of a pout to his lips and furrowed eyebrows.
Every response you gave always hints even tiny bits of trivias and tips he's never heard, Albedo always takes note of your spills that always cuts before reaching its climax. "-sorry, yes, this is activated charcoal Geo and Pyro slimes reaction." He lets out an audible sigh upon your retreat, your frustrated mind too occupied to notice.
"Please," his desperation drips in his word when he looks at you with eyes filled with raw emotion you'd never know he'd be able to pull off. Your tightly locked lips only pressed on further at his puppy eyes, "Please continue, I wish to know more about your Alchemy, if you would be so kind."
"It's not really- I'm not really the best at explaining it..." You're almost fidgeting, cheeks aching from tensing and warmth. But he regarded you with a blank stare, forcing you to fill the silence, "If I- If I start, my ramblings may not uhm they're not easy to comprehend... or something."
Albedo had been watching more than he'd like to admit, and he's come to relieved (yet still confused) realization that your treatment with him wasn't his alone. You always step back before things get lengthy, words then cutting short and concise with a steeled expression. Lips caught between teeth.
"I digress," his hand motions to yourself to emphasize his next clause. "As your field and sole practitioner of this art, like my own condition, your word of mouth is the best ground of knowledge."
If he was irritated, he's doing a very good job in hiding it. And even with the respectable yet close distance in between you still felt cornered. This is still your master and it's not professional to refuse a scholarly talk, "The electro crystals when charged... ionized? create sparks, while also producing the same result when smacking- mining!"
The scribbles of his pen against his clipboard as he nods in attention urges you on, realizing his focus and sincere interest on the topic, "So when you put the little tidbits or even powdered version in a beaker thingy, depending on the material, they interact with the spark. Honestly, I'm unsure yet how lethal it is but if you put the sparks under fire too, they make like those makeshift gunpowder as well as additional reactions such as-!"
The lilt and proceeding high pitch in your voice usually signifies the approach of your insecurity as well as the climax of your enthusiasm. At this point, you pull your hand up to shut your mouth forcefully, and when Albedo really detests the abrupt end of the conversation his hand would shoot forward to grasp your own.
He'd intertwine your fingers to distract, before urging you to continue with a challenging stare, as if daring you to use your other hand to pull that off again. This whole scene felt oddly scandalous, but oh boy does it send your mind into a bambling, overloaded mess. A heated head forces your lips open even if they sometimes come out in a jumbled string, he learns to decipher them.
The more you get used to or feel more comfortable, Albedo uses that fondness skillfully whenever he wants. "Can you tell me more about the scarlet chunks from Dragonspine?" He throws it so casually in the silence as you two work back to back in your stations, without a beat as your mind is partially preoccupied, you answered into a narrative of trivia. It almost feels like you're talking to the flames of the bunsen while you wait, but Albedo smiles at the now filled silence as he listens with divided attention.
He really likes your voice, and the word of wonders you bring along with you.
"For the record, I don't mind it at all," his breath hovers on your lips, cold and prickly, "Whatever comes out of these lips, I want to hear it all."
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That last part eheh
Woah, this went long. Like reader babbling hahaha. I said I'm gonna speedrun, not freaking write this long smh
@zelos-simp @legionqueensav @snackgod @rxsalinee @cala-ran @wind-wheel @lilydewi22 @yellowflowre @traveler-lumine @nonniechan @creation-magician @hanniejji @gojos-baby @just-some-stars @volleybloop @tartuu @moaa @dandelion-dreams @witchsungie @lehra @albaedhoe @xiaophilia @heisenwurst @childe-simp-exe
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cdroloisms · 3 years
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so... the red banquet, huh?
im not going to lie, i was cheering on the eggpire the entire time (/lh) - what can i say, something abt the demon possessed resident evil crew just speaks to my heart. theyre FUN, ok? 
anyway, a lot of people were theorizing abt what c!dream showing up at the banquet could look like - and, well, i thought i’d write my version of it. this takes place in the “guard dog au” developed primarily by a gc im in on twitter (@stabbysideblog being the main originator of it, do check sunny out !!) - the basic premise is post-getting the revive book from c!dream, c!quackity continues to get his, uh, “use” out of him by basically treating him as a bodyguard/guard dog as he goes around the server - which should probably give you a pretty good idea of how this is going to go :] 
tws: death, grief, implied torture, starvation, abuse, blood, murder, unhealthy relationship, dehumanization, possession, trauma, mental illness, violence, dark content, dark imagery, emotional distress, mental instability, pandora’s vault/prison arc, c!quackity critical (not really, but a very dark portrayal of him) 
A strangled sob claws its way up Puffy’s throat as she watches Foolish fall.
He drops in a spray of golden ichor in the crimson, brilliant green eyes trained on hers, jaw slack in horror, pain, dipping to the ground and whiting out before he’s even fully collapsed. The others’ screams hardly even meet her ears; all she can see is her son, falling, her son, dying, her son, that same sunlit kindness still held in the curve of his lips in this room that knows nothing but pain and betrayal, gone gone gone gone-
Because of her.
Ant’s still staring at her, pupils thinned to needles from the brightness of the lava at their backs, ears alert but stance entirely calm as he twirls his sword, still dripping gold. His mouth is moving but she cannot hear anything above the ring ring ringing in her ears, the world swirling and blurring dangerously from the tears gathering in her eyes and spilling over her cheeks, Ant’s eyes polished rubies where there had once been a cloudless sky. Bad gestures at the crowd, pushed back towards the lava’s fire in their fear, leaving her to stand in the middle of the room as one desperate dying scream, the egg, standing as a silent witness to it all-
“Bad-” a flash of blue, and there’s someone standing in front of her, shoulders pulled back, a diamond sword glittering their right hand, “Stop it.”
“Quackity.”’
Bad snarls, tail whipping back and forth; Puffy takes a step back, then another, shoulders still shaking in grief for her son, for her friends, for everyone who’s about to lose their lives in this twisted realm of crimson and hellfire. There is no fear on Quackity’s face though he stands unarmored, and for the first time in this awful day something like worry flashes over Bad’s face. There’s history here, she realizes - what did Bad say about Quackity attacking? - but none of this is making sense, not the self-assured way Quackity is carrying himself, wings relaxed and folded at his back, not the simmering unease making itself known in the foreign cadence of Bad’s voice.
“Oh my gosh, look at what you’ve done,” Quackity says, voice almost patronizing, like a parent stumbling in on the mess their child has made out of their bedroom, “this is impressive, I’m not going to lie, this is quite impressive.” Puffy swallows thickly, hears the shuddering gasp of someone behind her - Fundy, probably, or Sam - as Quackity’s voice drops. “You have to stop right now.”
“Stop?”
“This whole Egg thing is just getting out of control - you just killed a man,” Quackity stalks across the netherbrick floor like he has all the time in the world, ignoring the crossbows that the Eggpire has trained on his back, guarded only by the off-white shirt he’s wearing, an untied tie hanging limply around his neck. She sucks in a sharp breath through her teeth - my son, they killed my son, she means to say, but the words stick to the walls of her throat and only escape her lungs in another series of wracking sobs. “Is that what you wanted to do, Bad?”
He laughs - laughs, of all things, and there is something here that Puffy is missing, that isn’t clicking through the muddied fog of grief hanging grey and suffocating around her head, but Quackity is speaking again and she can’t think about it all, not now, “-and I’m not gonna have it anymore, Bad.”
He slips over by the crowd, eyes glancing all of them huddled in one fearful mob over the tables, eyes dark and daring and cold; the Eggpire keeps their eyes trained on him, Bad’s eyebrows furrowed, Ant’s muzzle twisted in a snarl. Puffy watches, their words passing over her like water skidding against the surface of a rock splitting a stream in two, heart thudding in her ears, marking out the heartsick beats in this poisoned melody - one-two, her-son, her-son, her-son-
He stops in front of her in the middle of monologuing, eyes trained on her own like he’s trying to tell her something. His eyes flick down and she follows their gaze to his other hand, the one not clasped around a sword handle, watches as he gestures vaguely in the direction of the Eggpire. She frowns, confusion cutting through the grief - what is he trying to say? - and Quackity sighs, index finger slashing in the air in the shape of what might be an A as he spins on his heel to walk back towards Bad and the others.
“So how about we just stop playing?”
Quackity smiles, teeth white and glittering from the lava’s glow even as the Eggpire surrounds him, pushes him back against the wall. Bad seems to hesitate, hand clasped around the trigger of a crossbow he keeps pointed at the other’s head; when he speaks, he almost sounds mournful.
“I can’t,” he mutters, quiet, stepping forwards as his shoulders straighten, pushing Quackity back in a motion that the others are quick to follow. Puffy watches, an awful sinking feeling falling through the hole left in her chest by the sight of her son, falling, her son, dead - watches as Quackity’s wings open, shine golden in the lava’s light - what is he planning?
“You know why I can’t stop.”
Quackity heaves a heavy sigh through his lungs, “Bad- you and all your buddies here, drop your weapons, and leave. Let all of these people go.”
“Or what?” Ant’s voice is sharp, but Quackity barely pays him a second thought, swinging a glare at his head and cutting him off.
“I’m not talking to you,” he laughs, dismissive, “I’m talking to Bad.”
“No-” Puffy watches as Bad’s hand tightens on his crossbow, punctuating the word with a step forward. “You put your weapon down. If you wanted to stop us?” He’s too close to Quackity for Puffy to make out either of their faces, crossbow bolt aimed and ready to send straight through his skull. She stiffens, sees from the corner of her eye as the ones beside her look away, and resigns herself to the inevitable spray of blood on brick - not again not again don’t make me watch again - “You should’ve brought more than just yourself.”
Quackity laughs.
“I did,” his voice is dangerous in its levity, making Bad, then the rest of the Eggpire step back as his wings spread open further, watching with bated breath and wide eyes as a swarm of white descends from a hidden hole in the wall, “Or, well, I did the next best thing. I brought my worst enemy.”
“What?”
“Alright Quackity, where’s this Egg thing?”
Technoblade jumps down into the room in a familiar purple-black blur of expertly enchanted netherite armor, form impeccable despite the seeming exhaustion in his voice. At his feet, a pack of wolves gather, pace, muscles coiled and clearly ready to strike; he rolls his shoulders back, signature fireworks loaded into his crossbow, and the crowd behind Puffy immediately breaks into shocked murmuring and soft cheers.
On Quackity’s other side, someone else flips into the room, wearing a suit of all things, crisp and well-pressed; Purpled grins, entirely too gleeful as the Eggpire presses back further, held off by the dogs swarming and growling at their feet.
“Purpled- we hired you!”
“To be frank with you, Bad, a sword appears in Purpled’s hand and he flips it casually, blade thin and gleaming, “Quackity just had the better price.”
“We- we still outnumber you!” Bad’s voice is a near-scream in its desperation, his tail lashing back and forth as he shifts his weight forward, “It’s four against three- we’ll still win-” Despite herself, Puffy’s mind spins; either way, they’re still at a disadvantage from sheer numbers alone, never mind Quackity’s lack of armor. Maybe if they all work together, they’ll be able to sufficiently stop them, but there’s no way she can see this ending in anything less than a bloodbath-
“I didn’t want for it to come to this, Bad,” Quackity’s voice drops low and sweet, the sincerity in his tone belied by his glittering eyes and jagged grin. The shift in tone sends a shiver down her back, has even his allies shifting uncomfortably in what seems to be confusion - Puffy catches something like a murmured no from Sam, behind her, before Quackity whistles, loud.
It all happens too fast for her to follow; one moment, the Eggpire is standing, weapons raised and ready to fight; the next, and there is a new netherite-clad figure in the middle of the room, signature sparks of purple from a pearl still glittering around them, axe buried into Antfrost’s chest. The room devolves into shrieks as his body dissolves, Bad gasping sharply and something dark bubbling in Puffy’s chest - good - as the newcomer in the room moves over to Ponk, bloodstained axe swinging in a downward arc, only barely stopped in time by a diamond sword catching on the crook of the blade.
“Go!” Quackity’s voice rings out above the chaos, and Techno and Purpled - seemingly shaken from their shock - fly into motion, fireworks bursting in flashes of red and black that send Puffy blinking out stars from her eyes, Purpled moving to match blows against Hannah and Techno’s army biting at the ankles of the Eggpire leader. Around her, people scream in relief, cheering as the Eggpire, clad in eggshell-blue, are pushed back one by one, hindered by a shifting wave of teeth and claws and clashing blades and netherite moving smoothly over the uneven floor - Bad screams, “RETREAT!”, and they disappear into the wall.
Purpled curses; “I’m going after them.” Puffy watches, still reeling, as he dives into the corridor that Bad had revealed, a flash of purple and blue melting into the shadows; the mystery figure - still hauling a heavy, bloodstained axe, nearly dragging against the floor - moves forward as to follow.
Quackity snaps his fingers, and the figure stops, turns, immediately moving to the winged man’s side. Behind her, Puffy can make out cheers, gasping, hysterical sounds of relief; she can’t join them, feels nothing but the shuddering weight of her grief pressing further on her lungs as the adrenaline fades, head dizzy with Foolish’ sharp gasp in pain, Ant’s yowl of agony. Her eyes flick to the side, catch on Sam pacing, muttering under his breath; when his eyes meet hers, they widen in something like - alarm?
She shakes her head; she can’t think about all of that, right now. Her hooves stumble over the vines and rot strewn over the floor, carrying her forward to the glitter of gold on red, to where her son had fallen and she could do no more but watch with a scream caught between her teeth.
A hand lands on her shoulder- “I’m sorry we couldn’t make it in time.”
She whirls around; Quackity’s looking down at her, face twisted in sympathy. Behind him, the armored stranger looms, hair long and tangled, helmet keeping their face in shadow and hiding their features from view. There’s something distantly familiar to them, in the way they shift from one foot to the other, something that makes her eyes narrow and throat tighten-
“Who are you?” The words tumble from her mouth, making Quackity freeze, jaw snapping shut, the figure behind him tensing almost imperceptibly under their armor. “Who-”
Quackity’s eyes are dark, piercing; she can’t read them, the flat line of his mouth as confusing as it is frustrating. His eyes flick up to somewhere over her shoulder before moving back to her own
“How rude of me,” He smiles, gold tooth glinting, “I didn’t even introduce our special guest.”
His right wing presses against their back, and they drop, immediately, to their knees, making her step back in shock. Quackity’s hand slips easily under the edge of their helmet, ripping it off with little care and letting their hair fall in a wave of dusty browns over their face; he pulls the strands back roughly, revealing the paleness to their skin, the hollows in their cheeks-
“Dream?”
Her breath shudders in her chest, eyes snapping up to Quackity, still smiling, hand still pressed against the back of his skull. Dream’s face is pale, thin, clawed with new scars that highlight the jut of his cheekbones and the dullness of his eyes. He looks up at her, eyes glassy, skin almost grey, and for a moment she’s looking at Foolish, eyes unseeing in death, the luster of his skin stolen like the air from his lungs, and she nearly screams.
“Puffy, Puffy,” Quackity murmurs, almost kind, “It’s alright, see? Everything’s fine now.”
“He- he’s supposed to be in prison,” she hisses, not missing how he flinches, not missing how even that is hindered by the hand braced against his head. He looks strangely small kneeling at Quackity’s side, dwarfed by the netherite he’s wearing; even with an axe strapped to his back, the blade still wet with crimson and reeking of iron and decay, he hardly looks like the villain that had terrorized the server, the son she could no longer recognize in the midst of the bridges he burned.
“Oh- don’t worry about him,” Quackity shrugs, wings fluttering, “It’s all being done with the Warden’s permission, Puffy, I know what I’m doing.” As if to prove his point, his hand tightens on the other’s hair, tugging his head back by the roots; Dream hardly even reacts, simply letting himself be manhandled, throat bare and exposed to the air, similarly criss-crossed by scars. “He’s perfectly well-behaved now, you see?”
Her throat closes, the pit in her gut torn open by the sight of her son with a blade skewered through his heart only growing wider, hungrier, by the dullness in the eyes of the other. Foolish’ death had happened too fast for her to react: one moment, he was staring at her, eyes mournful in goodbye; the next, he was a tumble of gold and green and blue against the floor, half of his name still not having left her lips. Dream’s head swivels to hers, face entirely blank; there is nothing quick written in the gauntness of his face, more scar tissue than skin, in the shadows under his eyes or how they seem to stare, unseeing, in the long, knotted strands of hair twisted over Quackity’s knuckles. He looks like he’s been dying, slowly, for months, and the screaming cry of YOU FAILED ringing in her head in Ant’s voice only grows louder.
“What did you-” the words scrape roughly against the inside of her mouth, “What did you do?”
Quackity shrugs, letting go, and Dream’s head tips forward to stare at the floor. “What had to be done.”
He clicks his fingers again, and Dream stands, falling behind Quackity with his shoulders pulled up to his ears. Quackity hands him back his helmet, keeping his hand stretched out, palm up, even after Dream takes the netherite and fastens it back over his head. Puffy watches, heart stuck in her throat, as Dream fiddles with something by his throat, pulls out a thick coil of iron chains, pressing the end to Quackity’s outstretched hand - the other side, she realizes, fastened around his neck.
Her breath stutters when he looks back at Quackity, gut roiling at the familiarity - it’s an imperfect copy of the way he used to look at her, a skittish shadow at her tail, all awkward smiles and fidgeting hands. Only now, his eyes don’t dance with the same light, his lungs shivering in fear instead of wheezing laughter; she watches as his head follows Quackity like he’s the only person in the room, a duckling imprinted on the nearest person and ready to follow to the ends of the world and further, and her heart shatters all over again.
“Anyway,” Quackity’s eyes soften, lips curled in sympathy, “My condolences, Puffy, for your son. It really is a tragedy.”
She watches him leave with tears in her eyes, a sob once again caught in her throat. The images overlap - Foolish, smiling under the sun’s glow, sitting on the roof of his summer home - Dream, grinning in the treetops, eyes as green as the leaves surrounding him - Foolish, falling in a spray of ichor and a gasp of pain, Dream, grey-eyed and silent, dead as the crimson rot surrounding his beaten body-
My condolences for your son, Quackity’s words echo in her skull, and not for the first time, she laughs miserably, tears falling from her eyes.
Which one?
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milliumizoomi · 4 years
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Tiktok Challenge: Take it
Pairings: Midoriya x POC Fem! Reader, Bakugou x POC Fem! Reader, Kirishima x POC Fem! Reader
All characters aged up!
For those who don’t know the dance, here.
A/n: I literally just saw this on tiktok and went Y E S💀
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Midoriya
So lemme give y’all he run down.. my manz was OUT
Like on the street when this happened
He was out with the boys of class 1-A
They was just chilling having a nice time yk
While you were with the girls of class 1-A at home
Basically y’all had a girls and boys day
The boys had gone to a movie and then a restaurant to go eat.
They had already ordered so they was just waiting
Things get hot from here luv👀
They were all on they phones and signing autographs
Cuz ppl recognized them
Then all of a sudden Kaminari literally SCREAMED out
“MIDORIYA! YO YOU HAVE GOT TO SEE THIS!” Kaminari yelled sticking the phone in Midoriya’s face
“Alright! Just calm down Kaminari you’re drawing attention!” Midoriya answered.
“Damn loud mouth” Bakugou chimed in too. “Nerd lemme see what that dumbass was so hyped for anyways.” He said again.
“Alright Kacchan but I haven’t seen it either-“
“Just shut up and watchhhh!” Kaminari urged.
They all just rolled their eyes and soon enough all the boys, including Kaminari, crowed around the phone.
And when I tell you their jaws dropped to the FLOOR
It was on tiktok was of you ofc and you were with the other girls doing the dance
Mind y’all, y’all were wearing the little pajamas the he absolutely loves on you, which were these.
So when y’all was lifting up your legs and y’all thang was thanging, nobody could move
They were stuck, especially Midoriya
His eyes was just following you. Your braids were swings and your skin was glowing.
And luv best not forget that your nails were done.
You and Mina did the dance together and when I tell you it was just ass and thighs EVERYWHERE.
And then the others girls hyping y’all up in tha back.
They was clapping ‘nd making people know wassup
And not to mention the comments, they were thirsty asl.
You had guys and girls in your comments talking bout some “ma I’m tryna treat you right” and “damn girl you gotta man👀”
Dudes literally said power off like not one even fidgeted
Next thing yk you at home with the girls getting all these texts from the Midoriya
He saying “Angel.. My love.. I saw you dancing on Tiktok with the girls.. I’m not sure what you think you doing yk all that’s for me”
GIRL YOU WERE SHOOKKKK
Like is this the same man who be stuttering over his words 24/7??
Talking to you like this??
Chile..in the next couple minutes, the girls were outta the house while Midoriya hauled ass to the room with you over his shoulder.
Bakugou
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So boom (no pun intended💀🤚🏽)
My man was working
Just in his office, doing some paperwork at his agency then later he was supposed to go on patrol
He was just minding his business, just doing his job
That was until the bakusquad started FaceTiming him none stop
Like ignored the call ATLEAST 5 times but they would not give up
He eventually just got fed up with the constant calls and answered the phone
“What the hell do you want?! Do you realize I’m working?!” Bakugou yelled at them, rolling his eyes.
“Dude you are NOT gonna be working when we show you this video..!” SERO said having a nervous grin
“Hah? What video?! You called me for a stupid ass video?!” Bakugou called out.
“Trust me Bakugou.. you’re gonna find it far from stupid” Mina chimes in, scratching her head
“Y-“ Bakugou started.
“No shush, I’m gonna send it to the chat now” Kaminari said
“.. Did dunce face just shush me?!” Bakugou said.
“We’ll talk about that later..! Now watchhhh” Kirishima said.
“Whatever” Bakugou said as he rolled eyes and went to the chat.
He clicked on the video and when I tell you he literally CHOKED
His brain? Factory Resarted
Who do you think you are shaking your ass like that all up in the camera
And it made it no better that you were doing this in one his custom made hoodie after the shirt he had in high school.
The bakusquad was laughing at Bakugou cuz manz looked like he was DROOLING
“Ight ima talk to y’all later I got an important phone call to make..” Bakugou said and hung up and called your ass IMMEDIATELY
You was just chilling when you got the call and when I tell you this man told you ALL the things he was finna do to you when he got home
Girl the hairs in your head was shaking
Your braids? They were shivering and that don’t happen much
Miss maam when he got home..
Let’s just say he had your black behind walking like your legs were broken the next day
Kirishima
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The poor man was in a interview
ON LIVE TELEVISION
And you gon’ do him like this???
He was in the middle of answering the interviewer’s questions when his phone just started buzzing nonstop
He wanted to look but once again.. ✨live television✨
He had to ignore them until the commercial break but he was glad that nobody could hear it buzzing
After the break came on he hurried to look at his phone quickly
Now to side track I just KNOW this man follow you on tiktok I just know it.
And your notification was on his phone but he ain’t see it and went straight to where Kaminari and Mina were spamming his messages
One of Kaminari’s said
“IDK IF YOU GOT THE NOTIFICATION BUT YOU NEED TO GO ON Y/N’S TIKTOK RN”
Kirishima was L O S T
He read the rest of Kaminari’s messages the went to Mina’s where she was basically saying the same thing
Mina was saying “KIRIII YOUR GIRL GETTING IT ON TIKTOK AND SHE LOOKING FINE TOOO”
Now he was like “hmmm I gotta see this now”
So he closed out of his messages and went on tikitok and when he opened it immediately yours was the first to pop up and it had thousands of likes
He froze at the sight of you.
There you were, in the female version of his hero costume.
Shaking your thicc behind self all up in the screen
Even when you was barely moving everything was jiggling
Manz had to cover his phone and hurry to put it in his pocket when the commercial break was over
He was literally SWEATING while his mini ‘shima was abt to make an appearance in this interview if these ppl ain’t hurry up
He could not focus at all
He was fidgeting all over the place and all he could think of was you in a recreation of his hero costume
He looked EVERYWHERE but at the interviewer so he wouldn’t crack
Best believe when that interview was over than man moved like the he was running for his life
Manz was GONE in the blink of an eye
Them interviewers while so confused when Kirishima was screaming thank you at them while he bolted out the door.
Meanwhile you just finished making some other tiktoks to post later
Mind you, you had already changed out of your costume
When all of a sudden, in a matter of minutes, the door just busted open with Kirishima huffin’ and puffin’ at the door.
Manz was look mad ASF
Girl u almost pitched right tf over
You went to swinging cuz the door was right behind you and you almost hit him until he grabbed your hand mid swing
When you looked up and realized it was him chile ya whole body relaxed
“DAMMIT! Eiji you scared the crap outta me! Don’t do that!” You screamed
“Be quiet brat..” Kirishima growled.
“Eiji what are you- AYE! BOY IF YOU DONT PUT ME DOWN!” You screamed when he threw you over his shoulder.
“I saw your Tiktok babe.. you looked so hot dressed up like me.. but you were shaking what’s mines.. you know better..” He said lowly.
You was trying your best to break free but my man had the grip of steel on you
You knew you wasn’t going nowhere soon
And chileeee...
The next few days after that, walking was a difficult task.
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©Property of Miashimaa. Please don’t rectify, repost or modify without my permission.
Taglist: @uniquabackyardigans @haikyu-whore @kiribis-confesion-page (Open, but please specify which taglist you want to be added to)
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bonky-n-steeb · 2 years
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sorry for this rant
I feel like I’m not normal as I don’t know how to talk to people as I was sheltered as a kid and wasn’t allowed to go to bday parties or play dates. So I never really learned as people started to ignore me probably think she won’t hang out like I invited her b4.
So now I’m actually don’t feel normal as I make scenarios in my head that I have a fake friend group doesn’t matter if it’s my own characters or from a tvshows/movie. Like rn I’m in a friend group with characters in stranger things. Like I do wish I could live a life where I can be happy and make friends like I do in my head.
Like everyone around me is making friends and I’m in the corner quiet and just in my scenarios. Like is this normal for others cuz I can’t really talk abt it to my friends cuz I do feel like they would judge and not understand y. Cuz I told my friend abt the bday/play date things and she told me it was stupid that I’m resenting that and saying it’s why I can’t talk to others.
And it’s just stupid cuz if I put my scenarios self and like the scenario me is more sarcastic and sassy. But when I am sarcastic in irl I don’t think ppl understand I am trying to be. Which is kinda mean but I like I do feel like this version of me would be happier cuz they seem really fun to be around. But I still don’t really know how to hold a convo as in my scenarios I’m always already in one so I didn’t need to worry and for making friends I just know the ppl b4. Like when I hang with my friend that helps gets the other me does come out but my friend is leaving so i feel like it’s gonna be gone.
like it’s just weird for me cuz I did rant to someone anonymous somewhere abt me making scenarios and they were like that’s weird which makes me think i’m not normal for doing it.
yeah I just feel like I only make the scenarios as I have social anxiety so talking to ppl is hard and like ppl always tell me just don’t care abt other’s opinions but in my mind I seek validation from others as im a people pleaser but it never really works out. like I also feel out of place cuz I always like movies and talking abt my favourite characters and my “best” friend idk if I can even call her that makes fun of me saying I have crushes on them which hurts cuz I just want to talk abt a interest of mine. like I can tell she’s making a joke but like she does it a lot to the point I don’t think it’s a joke and it makes me uncomfortable but ppl find it funny so I never say to stop cuz then I feel like i’m ruining everything. like I sometimes feel like she’s only my friend cuz she lost her old best friend right before we became friends.
I honestly think it’s pretty okay to make fake scenarios in your head cuz I do it too. I definitely can’t say for other people, but for me it’s a very safe way to cope. So pls don’t feel alone. Also I think it’s better to be alone than have such friends, but that’s just me I guess. And if you feel too low, pls seek for help from professionals who will help you much better. I hope you have a good day!
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rafecameron · 4 years
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dancing on my own
request: Angst with no happy ending? How abt *insert actor/character* getting married and their ex (the reader) kinda 'forcing herself' to go to the wedding bc she really wants to see their mutual friends again but like doesn't wanna see the wedding. And reader just watching the love of their live get married and be happy with someone else and their heart silently being ripped apart? Too cruel?
pairing: ex!luke patterson x reader
word count: 2.1K
warnings: heartbreak, no happy ending
a/n: here you go cruel anon. turns out im not that great at heartbreak but hopefully this makes your heart crack a little bit. (also idk if people read authors notes but my requests are currently closed!) 
Y/N thought back on all the times she could have turned around. When she was getting into her car. When she reached the airport. When she queued to board the plane. When she checked into her hotel. When she began to get ready. Now she was facing the very last time she could turn around. Stood outside the venue, all dressed up with no one to walk her inside. But just like the times before, she didn’t turn around, she pushed on. Her heart breaking a little more with each step, she knew that surely by the end of the night there would be nothing left but crumbs. She had promised herself two things before this trip. Number one; she would not speak to him. Number two; she would not cry. She wasn’t entirely sure she would be able to keep either of the promises to herself, but repeating them in her head made her feel that little bit calmer.
She situated herself beside a table lined with drinks, helping herself to a flute of champagne. She was anxious for the doors to be opened so she could find a seat, somewhere in a corner at the back would suit her just fine. Out of sight of anyone who would surely recognise her, she had no intentions of engaging in conversation until the reception. But seeing as what was happening today she should have known it would be her unlucky day.
“Well aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” a voice speaks beside her and she turns, landing eyes on someone she had not seen for far too long. His suit was tailored perfectly to his body, his long hair tied in a bun at the back of his head. “I wasn’t sure you’d come.” He pulls her into a hug.
“I wasn’t sure I would either,” she admits as she pulls away, “I wasn’t going to, but I wanted to see everyone...most people.”
Willie laughs softly, “I’m glad you’re here, sit beside me?” He asks, motioning with his head towards the doors that were being pulled open.
“Oh, I was just gonna sit in the back,” she stumbles over her words as Willie takes ahold of her hand, “Aren’t you going to sit with Alex?”
“He’s preoccupied.” Willie states simply, ignoring her protests as he pulls her towards the front of the room to take a seat in the front row.
She sighs as she sits down beside him. The sick feeling in her stomach growing as the room slowly became more and more full, people lining up on the benches and getting ready to watch the ceremony.
Willie reaches down and takes ahold of her hand again, giving it a light squeeze and offering a comforting smile, “You don’t have to stay.” He whispers.
“I do.” She nods, “I want to see everyone, I won’t stay all day but I need to at least say hello now I’m here.”
Willie nods his head, squeezing her hand one last time and patting her knees before turning back to face forward, the ceremony would be starting any minute and she found that her eyes were glued to the pattern on the floor.
For the entirety of the ceremony she didn’t look up. She didn’t want to risk meeting his eyes, didn’t want to see her friends sympathetic looks and definitely didn’t want to see the bride looking beautiful in her white dress. She tried her best not to listen, she couldn’t stomach hearing the vows and knew if she heard the words I do in his voice she’d cry. So she thought about anything else but what was happening in front of her.
She finally looked up when the couple was safely past her line of sight, eyes instantly meeting that of an old blonde friend. He gave her a wave, she was sure the smile was supposed to make her feel better but she just felt more pathetic. Why was she even here? She’s sure the invite was out of politeness and not an actual invitation to come. And if her friends were going to be tiptoeing around her and treating her like a porcelain doll she wasn’t sure she could cope. The nicer people were to her about this the more likely it was she would break down.
She didn’t want to think about it, about him, sure she was at his wedding but that didn’t mean this day had to be about him. She wanted to have a catch up with her friends, avoid her ex the whole night and then go back home, cry with a bottle of wine and forget this whole thing ever happened.
“I’m glad you came.” Alex says as he reaches her, pulling her into a hug, “It’s good to see you.”
“Yeah, it’s good to see you too.” She responds truthfully, “Can we go to the reception? I think I need a drink already.”
Alex laughs, taking Willies hand in his own and leading the way towards the after party. The amount of people that were there she was sure she would be able to avoid the groom for the night. She found herself situated on a table with her friends, helping herself to a glass of wine and making sure the bottle was kept close to her.
No matter how excited she was to see her friends she found that now she was here she was finding it hard to hold a conversation. The group around her were still familiar with each other, still seeing each other and having things to talk about, she felt a little like a spare part. But still she smiled along and listened to their conversation. Something about a recent party they had attended where Reggie had drank a little too much, she laughed along with them unsure of what else to do. The more they spoke and tried to involve her in the conversation the more she realised she didn’t really know the people around her anymore. Sure she had good memories with them and she would always consider them her friends, but she didn’t really know them.
The best thing about weddings it that you can be invisible if you wanted to be. The bride and groom were always busy, everyone wanting to talk to them and congratulate them, and the drunker the guests got the easier it was to slip away from conversations and merely watch the scenes unfold. Which is exactly what she did. She watched her friends get drunk and progressively louder, not noticing anymore if she wasn’t joining in their conversation. If the night continued this way she was certain she would make it out in one piece.
She thought she was doing a pretty good job of avoiding the one person she feared seeing the most. But halfway through the night a hand landed on her shoulder and a familiar scent filled her nose. She felt her skin ignite where his fingers touched and she begged the butterflies in her stomach to go away, to fly away and disappear forever.
Turning in her seat she finally meets his eyes for the first time that night, forcing a smile onto her face as she stands up and allows him to pull her into a hug. Her heart hammers in her chest and she uses every ounce of will power within her to not shed any tears, she felt the epitome of pathetic. Wanting to cry at a wedding like she was in a bad romcom movie. Only if this were a movie she’d get the guy, or a second guy would come sweep her off her feet and make her forget the first one was ever there. She didn’t see that happening anytime soon.
“Thanks for coming.” Luke smiles, “You look great, that colour really suits you.”
She returns his smile with a tight lipped one of her own, “Thanks, you don’t look too bad yourself.” She attempts a light hearted laugh.
She looked away, she couldn’t stand looking into his eyes any longer, his gaze intense and stirring way too many different emotions inside of her. She wanted him to be horrible to her, to tell her to leave and never come back, not to tell her she looks great. How was she ever supposed to get over him when he was nothing but nice to her all the time. She wished he had done something at the end to allow her to hate him. Cheat on her maybe, or tell her he never loved her, then maybe she’d stand a tiny chance of getting over him and moving on with her life. Instead he was selfish and kept her at arms length because he knew he always could and that should have been enough for her to stay away, but she just couldn’t.
“Congratulations,” she looks back at him, eyes settling just above his to avoid his gaze, “You seem really happy, I wish you all the best.”
“Thanks,” he smiles and it’s genuine, something which breaks her heart a little more.
Of course she wants him to be happy, but a bigger part of her wants him to be happy with her and not anyone else. She knows that’s selfish, but that doesn’t stop her from trying to wish it into existence no matter how futile she knows it is.
“Have you met Jess?” He asks, placing a hand on her shoulder as though about to lead her somewhere.
“Oh, no I haven’t but she looks busy,” she quickly shrugs his hand off, the bride she could see from the corner of her eye, laughing at something another guest had said, “I’ll introduce myself later.” She lies.
The only thing she could think that would be worse than this wedding was having to actually meet the bride. To meet her replacement, the better version. The one who had stolen his heart and been worth enough to keep it forever. She forces a smile and excuses herself to the bathroom.
As she reaches the bathroom she can feel her eyes stinging, shutting herself in a cubicle she fans her face, determined not to let a single tear fall. She had made a promise to herself and the least she could do was keep it. She leant her head back against the door, letting out a shaky breath to compose herself.
Once she was sure she wouldn’t cry she exited the bathroom again, thankful to see that he was no longer at the table she had just ran from. She took her seat and no one asked where she had been or if she was okay, she was glad for that at least.
As the night wore on she thought she was doing okay, one little hiccup but no tears since, she’d even found herself genuinely laughing at a couple points. He’d spoken to her and she hadn’t thrown up on his shoes, he had no reason to try and speak to her again.
But then it was time for the first dance and she felt her chest tightening. Her calm composure being over taken by a sinking feeling of dread. She watched for a minute, watched him hold her close and smile. Watched him lean in to kiss her gently before spinning her under his arm and pulling her back in. She wished more than anything that it was her in his arms, her who he still looked at like the world shone behind her eyes. But it would never be her again, and his bride she was sure was far more beautiful than she could ever hope to be.
She watched as more dancers joined the floor, her friends among them. She tried to smile, but the sight was too much for her. Her friends laughing and dancing with their loved ones while she sat on the side lines and watched feeling like a stranger. The slow music a melancholy soundtrack to her emotions, reminding her of something she could never have.
She stands from the table, dragging her eyes over each person she knew, lingering on Luke for a moment longer before she turned and walked out of the room. She knew that this would be the last time she ever saw him, because she knew seeing him happy with someone else would be a slow form of torture. So she walked away, from him, from her friends forever, leaving whatever little pieces were left of her heart behind. By the time she exited the building she felt nothing more than a hollow shell and she finally let the tears fall.
tags: @lovesanimals @makebank @chrlsgillespie @crybabyddl @marinettepotterandplagg @caitsymichelle13 @kcd15 @kinda-really-lost @alexpjoyner @meangirlsx
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wormsound · 4 years
Note
THOUGHTS ON NIE MINGJUE
HHHHHHHH OKAY NIE MINGJUE I HAVE MANY THOUGHTS ON NIE MINGJUE! most of them are just I LOVE HIM and he deserved BETTER and the rest of them is just kind of incoherent screaming in my brain BUT I shall try 2 make words out of them
OKAY SO tbh I don’t know when my brain decided to get on the love for da-ge train but it did and oh boy it’s not getting off any time soon. I think I watched fatal journey and vaguely considered nielan for A Bit Too Long one time and now I’m just kinda stuck here. 
I honestly didn’t really give Nie Mingjue that much thought at all until I watched fatal journey and then the thoughts came through with reckless abandon. in fatal journey you certainly see NMJ in a very different light compared to what you see in CQL. you see his raw emotion and his thought process, his tactics as a leader and first and foremost you see how he functions as an elder brother. BUT this is bearing in mind all of this is while he is heavily under the influence of Jin Guangyao’s version of the song of clarity. you see much more of how much JGY’s remix is actually changing him and how different he has become in comparison to the Nie Mingjue you see in the earlier episodes of CQL. it is much clearer that it wasn’t just enhancing the resentment of the sword spirit within him. it was enhancing every little feeling and emotion tenfold.
you see this probably the most clearly with the different way he interacts with Nie Huaisang from the start of CQL to the start of fatal journey. when you’re first introduced to NMJ in CQL you see that he is annoyed and frustrated at NHS when he finally returns from galivanting around with WWX, yet it is no more than a sharp look and a sigh, mostly coming from the worry that NHS didn’t come straight home when he said he would. when Nie Huaisang’s actions frustrate him again at the start of fatal journey (when under the influence of the JGY remix) he lashes out at NHS so much that he nearly physically hurts him. of course, he never does because he cares for him so much and not matter how much the song of clarity enhances his rage and frustration, it also enhances how much he would never want to hurt his little brother and its why he never does, because he can’t. when he’s almost completely taken over by it and kills Zonghui and the rest of the disciples, he can’t hurt Huaisang. and even when he is dying he can still fight through it when he sees his little brother. 
NMJ is fiercely protective of his loved ones and his little brother is clearly at the top of that list. I’m pretty sure that his overprotectiveness - particularly for Nie Huaisang - stemmed from his father’s death. when his father received a severe injury from taking NMJ on a night hunt and later died as a result, it left Nie Mingjue - only a teenager – with the responsibility to step up as sect leader, to raise his little brother and to carry the burden of the soul spirit and the curse of the Nie sect. all this as well is weighed down by the fact that NMJ would undoubtedly blame himself for his father’s death and the fact that he was unable to prevent it. this is what shapes him into a strong willed and determined sect leader, strict with rules and discipline. he uses the guilt he feels over his father’s death and channels in into running the Nie sect. determined to keep the Nie sect as strong as possible, he follows the same routes his father and ancestors did; running it in a military like style and continuing to allow sacrifices to be made to the sword spirit. Nie Mingjue knows what his sword spirit will eventually do to him, that he will not be around to pass it on to another generation and the fate will befall to his younger brother. so, when it comes to Nie Huaisang, all NMJ wants for him is to do well within the cultivation world, for him to be able to grow into a strong sect leader in the way he knows he himself will never live to become. he is strict with him because he wants his little brother to be able to be strong enough to never have to burden himself with the sword spirit. and it’s the knowledge that one day NHS may have to that ignites his frustration with him when Nie Huaisang shows so little interest in following in what he wants for him. because all he ever wants is for Nie Huaisang to be able to do better than he has done in his life. he wants to be able to always protect him and it kills him that he will one day be no longer able to do that. so, when Nie Mingjue is dying, when he is qi deviating, the need to protect his little brother is still there, in fact it so strong that it breaks through everything else. the need for NMJ to still be there to protect NHS is stronger than his rage and hate for JGY. in that moment, if JGY hadn’t intervened further NMJ could have most likely been pulled back from that edge. Jin Guangyao pulled every string in NMJ’s brain and increased every little thing he was feeling until he was nothing but a ball of rage and hurt and sadness and a tremendous amount of love and protection for his brother and the others he cared about. it’s why in the end, it didn’t work. JGY still had to have Xue yang cut NMJ’s head off to kill him. he never considered the other parts of Nie Mingjue he was changing when he put his little plan into action, the things that would still anchor him down and keep him human. and in the end, his cruel way of revenge and killing NMJ for his own gain ultimately backfired on him and led him to his own downfall.
what hurts so fucking much about what JGY did to NMJ is that it wouldn’t have worked it NMJ didn’t let it. obviously he had no idea what JGY was doing to him but he allowed him to be close enough for it to work. ultimately NMJ tried to work with JGY as best he could. he was devastated abt what meng yao did and that he had to banish him. he still worries about what became of him after he left and inquires after his wellbeing when he thinks he went to Jinlintai. his true distrust in JGY only starts – quite rightly so - after the events during the Sunshot campaign. and imagine how NMJ must have felt when he saw what JGY was capable of during Sunshot? NMJ saw meng yao, an outcast bullied by his peers and degraded for his parentage. so, he gave him a chance, stood up for him when everyone else was kicking him (literally) to the curb. all JGY wanted was the recognition of his father and NMJ figured he deserved the chance to get that. he built him up and gave him a strong position of power, even wrote to Jin Guangshan to persuade him to recognise his son. but then when JGY turns around and abuses that power he gives him and uses it to get away with literal murder and to crawl his way up the ranks, NMJ would’ve felt responsible for JGY actions because he was the one who enabled him to be in that position in the first place. NMJ had very strong, very rightful doubts about JGY after he killed his captain and his disciples during Sunshot, yet he cared about him in the past and he saw that some of JGY’s actions benefitted the good, and he saw how much trust LXC has in him and he allowed it to sway his gut feelings. you can see as they become sworn brothers that the distrust is still there quite strongly so I like to think that initially NMJ agreed to become sworn brothers with JGY as a way of “keeping the enemy close”. he would’ve wanted to keep a close eye on him, protect LXC if necessary, and partly because he still wanted to see if the good he once saw in him was still there. he wanted to believe that he was wrong and that JGY wasn’t lying. LXC suggested the sworn brotherhood as a way to build a bridge between NMJ and JGY, and honestly? it worked. but only on one half. and that half is Nie Mingjue, not Jin Guangyao.
in order for NMJ to let JGY play him the song of clarity in the first place, the trust he originally lost in him, he must have started to regain again over the years as his sworn brother. he would’ve seen JGY do good work and rise up the ranks, step ‘humbly’ into Jin Zixuan’s place and he would’ve seen how much trust LXC had in JGY. each little thing lessened that distrust to the extent he allowed JGY to know of how the sword spirit resentment affected him, and to trust him enough to let him try heal him. his distrust in JGY clearly never went away completely, but during those 16 years, NMJ trusted him enough to put his life in JGY’s hands and ultimately paid the price for it. 
but this is where I think Jin Guangyao went wrong. he never saw past the rage and distrust NMJ had in him at the start and instead used it as another excuse for his actions. he never considered the fact in allowing JGY to get so close that he could try kill him in such a way, that that was the very reason not to. and even if he did realise that NMJ trusted him again, he was too far in his grab for power to stop. instead, Jin Guangyao took the small amount of distrust that NMJ still had in him, and then increased it and made him feel it ten times worse over and over and over, until NMJ finally snapped with him. JGY made NMJ resentment for him ten times worse for himself to finally give him more means to justify killing him than it simply being that NMJ stood in the way when it came to his grasp for power. but in the end, all JGY was doing was sowing the seeds of his own destruction.
putting aside all the depressing plot stuff for a minute bc if I think abt it any harder for any longer I think I’m gonna combust SO I’m gonna jump back to just how much I LOVE HIM and I just DO I don’t fucking know why, I suppose I have a lil bit of a thing for tragedy and oh boy is the life of Nie Mingjue a tragedy, and I guess I have a soft spot for the “guy with a tough exterior is in reality really soft and goofy around those he loves and cares abt” trope. I guess what I also love abt him is that not many people see it. yes, he has an incredibly tough exterior that many people find it difficult to see past, but NMJ is soft, he is kind and he cares so very deeply about the people he loves. you see him so different once you go back and watch CQL from the beginning knowing the plot and having seen NMJ screaming and sobbing in his brother’s arms, his death looming ever so close on the horizon. You can see past his exterior and realise that he isn’t just Nie Huaisang’s angry older brother. you see him kind and eager and teasing with Lan Xichen and what can be first seen as anger with NHS is really just worry. and… it just makes everything just so much more heart-breaking. Because you realise what’s going to happen to him, what he is going to go through and you realise just how much he never fucking deserved it.
and now I’m very sad and feel like I should go write smthn abt him retiring with LXC and taking up beekeeping or smthn idk I just want him to be HAPPY :( 
i probs could write more but im not gonna bc yikes this got long and probably is just still a bunch of incoherent rambling if it feels like there’s stuff missing there probably is my brain has the thoughts lmao it just doesnt have the capacity to realise what they are and get them written down SO 
tldr;
NIE MINGJUE IS SOFT AND KIND AND CARES ABT EVERYONE HE LOVES SO GODDAMN MUCH AND HE REALLY FUCKING DIDN’T DESERVE WHAT HE GOT
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zontiky · 4 years
Text
okay so i tried to save this ask as a draft and it got deleted because tumblr is just such a functional website like that <3 but the prompt was “the hargreeves as ghosts in the apocalypse with five” or something like that i’m going to scream
this is SUPER long so i’m putting it under the cut hfkjsd
pre-five: the hargreeves siblings are dead. wait i feel a drabble coming on ooh
The Hargreeves siblings are dead.
Ben isn’t very aware of this at first. He’s been dead since 2006 -- he’s quite used to it, by now. What he is aware of, first, is light. Blinding white light. And Vanya, in the middle of it. He doesn’t close his eyes because he can’t feel pain, but if he could he thinks she would have made him blind. There’s light, and heat, and power, and then he closes his eyes anyway because the ceiling is collapsing around him and it’s instinctual.
When he opens them again he sees ash. Ash -- and Klaus.
He’s gotten used to Klaus, too. Klaus has a memorable sort of face; even if he didn’t, Ben has seen it every single day for almost twenty years. He doesn’t know if it’s actually been twenty years, for him. He doesn’t know how time moves for ghosts. Klaus has assured him it moves the same as it does for the living. Ben isn’t sure Klaus, stoned out of his mind, bleeding sluggishly from his arm, knew what he was talking about.
Anyway.
Klaus.
He’s wearing the coat he’s been flaunting around for the past week. His shirt is see-through, with little stars on it, like a pale imitation of the sky. Ben remembers his pants had laces on them, he’s sure they did not a minute ago, before the brightness that threatened to wipe out his very soul -- his soul is all he has left, really. His gaze drifts down anyway, to check.
Yes. Klaus’ pants have laces up the sides.
“No,” Ben says. Klaus is laying in a heap on the ground, his fingers curled like his tendons have been cut.
His lips feel numb because they always feel numb. Because Ben can’t feel at all. He takes a step. “No,” he says again, louder, surer. “No!”
Klaus looks up at him. His makeup is smudged, like it tends to be. His lips are bitten raw, like they tend to be. His hair is a mess, like it tends to be, and like it will be, always, because Klaus isn’t breathing.
Klaus is lying in a heap on the ground. Klaus is standing above his own body. Klaus is reaching for Ben like he’s hoping to touch him for the first time in years. Just when Klaus’ cold, dead, fingers brush his face, a voice from behind says, so quietly, dripping with disbelief: “Ben?”
Ben shuts his eyes and wishes desperately he could cry.
He feels a hand on his shoulder, for the first time in so, so long, but he also doesn’t feel it at all. He feels-but-doesn’t-feel someone turn him around, until they are saying, “Ben? Ben!” and he has no choice but to open his eyes and face the music.
Diego is gripping his shoulders like he is a dying man and Ben is the answer. Behind him, Luther and Allison watch them, stunned silent. Allison’s hands are pressed to her mouth. She looks like she wants to cry. 
And Vanya. Little Vanya, painted white. Her head is hung as her shoulders shake with the weight of the destruction she has so inevitably caused. (Ben would say he always knew she was destined for great things -- but he can’t, because he didn’t.) (Nobody ever said great things had to be good.)
The Hargreeves siblings are dead. Their bodies are strewn across what is left of their childhood home, smouldering and burning, and Ben is very aware of that fact.
righto anyway. so they have an emotional reunion but its also kind of bitter? id have to actually write this for it to make sense so lets skip it for now lol
five shows up
he cannot see them obviously bc theyre all ghosts
god if i did write this it would be such a monster of a fic and would take me like 2 years to finish i already know fhkjdsk
somehow ?? they manage to influence the world around them maybe? idk maybe now that klaus is dead hes sober
or maybe hes high for all eternity?
for the purposes of this au lets say he died sober or in the late stages of withdrawal, and bc ghosts cant feel pain in action hes sober
so EVENTUALLY they figure out how to corporealize bc klaus is like blam wham ghost powers
asdlfk that sounds so stupid im sorry
he would say that tho imho,,, it sounds like something hed say,,,
if i DID write this it would be alternating povs also,,,
ok so out of all of them klaus and ben have the most experience homeless
and while being stuck in an apocalypse is not at all the same thing as being homeless it does help to have some knowledge
five doesnt eat the twinkie!! good for him
dammit okay. theres 2 options we can take here. in the comics five couldnt get back bc he fucked up his math and spent 15 years doing the wrong thing, but if u apply that here, with 6 other ppl checking his work this could be avoided and they end up skipping the whole assassin shtick and just hopping straight back to 2019, ready to prevent the apocalypse
OR five still gets hired for the commission but the sibs are tagging along
i think bc five isnt completely alone in this au unfortunately dolores doesnt exist :((
for each other the 2 paths tho theres also options?? bc they (ghosts) can go back in time and inhabit their past selves bodies? OR they could just,,, cease to exist
IM JUST NOW REALIZING HOW MANY PATHS THIS COULD TAKE,, AAH FUCK
okay gonna split this into parts. this is gonna be so long brace yourselves.
1) they go back in time because math checking and the ghosts swap out for their past selves
after multiple years of being stuck in an apocalypse together i think they would learn to get along with each other. like at least a little bit
which would make it easier for them to prevent the apocalypse
bc theyd:
trust each other more
already know abt the apocalypse and not have to wait for five to grace them all with his knowledge
are working as a team from the very beginning
have open lines of communication
yeah uh. so there
vanya is also already aware of her powers so the whole harold goading her into turning against her family and snapping to wipe out all life on earth thing? yeah that doesnt happen
oh and harold wouldn’t know how to do that in the first place because klaus wouldn’t throw out reggie’s journal! this solves so many problems wtf
there’s still commission issues bc they (and by they i mean five) are on the commission’s radar
so there’s still dope fight scenes sdlkfd pinky promise
okay idk. they stop the apocalypse and everything is okay the end hfkjd
2) they fix the math but only five can go back and the ghosts cease to exist
this is just sad! it would be sad okay! im sad! lets move on
subset of the past one: ben CAN go back with five because he was already dead and time travel affects them differently or something idk
aaaaaa
five & ben dynamic duo would be dope as shit BUT five would not be able to see him... so they use klaus as a middleman fjsdsfd
is there 2 bens? is one ben deleted in favor of the time-traveling ben? i dont know! i dont know my brain is melting
either way shit is happening yall!! obviously klaus is clued in, directly or indirectly it doesnt matter but he is on board the ‘don’t let the entire world end in flames’ train
3) they join the commission and then when five goes back in time they all go back
this is fun because now five is a highly trained assassin who is also lowkey a complete marshmallow for his siblings and once again TEAMWORK WOO
basically the first path but now five has a gun fhsdjk
4) they join the commission but five has to leave them behind and they cease to exist
five with a gun but hes sad now
i didnt go into how much losing his siblings would suck in the prev path but like. it would suck so much. he’s already lost them once if you think about it when he time traveled the first time and yeah he found the adult ghost versions but,, its different
and now suddenly hes stuck with these strange adult versions of the people he knows and he KNOWS them but also he doesnt? at all? they dont have all the years of shared experiences together? and theyre all grown up from the first ‘set’ of siblings he had which for five was like 40+ years ago??
SCREAMS
i have losing my mind disease (self-diagnosed)
subset: five has to leave them behind but they still exist because the commission is out-of-time kind of? idk but they’re still floating around somewhere and come back to impact the plot later or something
yeah idk. literally just wrote them down bc i didnt want them to die^2 hfkjwehd
subset: they still exist but instead of being just Somewhere they’re specifically at the assassination of JFK onwards because thats where five left them and they either go on ghosting and make an appearance in s2 OR they cease because them-wise they havent died yet but that doesnt make sense because ghosts can time travel so nevermind
i dont have the brain energy left to explore this one aaaa
okay jesus christ i think that’s all
I DON’T KNOW. i don’t know. i might write some more of this because honestly it is a very fine flavor of angst + hurt/comfort <3
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kae-karo · 4 years
Text
so i just finished watching the absolutely incredible mha musical (x) and if ur wondering what to expect (aside from frankly amazing voice acting, excellent cosplays AND acting, fantastic musical adaptations, and a better and more comprehensible plot than bnha):
inko dabs
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shiggy calls all might's cell phone
(all might’s ringtone is never gonna give you up)
inko pulls the ‘would you like to stay for dinner/would you like to stay forever’ line while flirting with all might
baku trying to shush the audience for cheering for todo
aizawa’s intro being him telling the kids to shut up bc “this is a classroom...people sleep in here”
baku on the ground screaming instead of doing the dance routine
aizawa and inko fight for narrator rights
a lidl advertisement with all might, a cement? commercial? with cementos, a deodorant commercial with hagakure and mineta, a water commercial featuring all mights ass
baku telling todo that only he is allowed to threaten deku
inko (whilst narrating) patting shouto on the head
kiri and kami arguing over biology homework only for baku to be like ‘we deadass don’t have bio class in this school’
iida walking up, opening a locker, closing it immediately and giving deku a thumbs up before walking away
all might getting ‘stuck’ in the locker, deku shoving him back in and him stepping out around the locker prop
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shiggy threatening all might with a letter made of cut-out magazine/newspaper letters
mineta asking deku if he’s gay
uraraka calling deku out on only owning one pair of shoes
after baku wins the tournament he carries a tiny trophy around with him everywhere like EVERYWHERE
aizawa tries to kick deku out of ua to protect him (what should’ve happened in the first place tbh)
todo calls deku out for hiding from the class in order to “cower in shame for his biggest failure” of getting kicked out of ua
todo and deku shake hands and the entire audience reacts as if they started making out
todo then proceeds to have the most hilarious gay panic after a duet with deku and SPRINTS off stage
BAKU HAS BET ON IT STRIPPING SCENE, JUMPS OFF THE FUCKING STAGE AND RUNS THROUGH THE AUDIENCE I’M-
bo----both????
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frankly a more realistic and effective plot than anything in bnha, with actually better messaging sfdlsdfjkldsjkl
deku throws a donut at shiggy to stop him from killing all might
the outcome of deku’s detroit smash is just shiggy staring at deku like this for a solid three seconds
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some really impressive acting by shiggy’s actor like oh my god give this person a live action role honestly
baku beats up shiggy specifically to tell him that he is the only one allowed to bully deku
shiggy dropping a ‘i would’ve gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids’
aizawa high fives deku
SHIGGY?? REDEMPTION???? ARC????? by going. fishing. with aizawa and mic. we love some implied erasermic in this household
bakudeku fist bump receiving the same audience screams as tododeku handshake
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jaws theme for dark shadow (somehow unattached to tokoyami sdfljdsfk) sneaking up on shiggy to spook him
this,,,,,,,is nezu,,,,,,,
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deku deadass thinking the love note uraraka left him was not for him
BAKU ACCIDENTALLY GRABBING SAID LOVE NOTE FROM URARAKA AND THINKING IT’S FOR HIM OH MY GOD
todo calling deku breathtaking oh my god jlfsdjklsdfkljsdf all i can think abt is how the intro card for the show says that ‘any changes made to the plot were for the purposes of adapting it to a stage environment’ i see u creators i fuckin see u AND I RESPECT U
kiri does the worm. everyone throws money on him. baku does this.
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todo has sunglasses.
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uraraka crawls on the floor to grab all the money.
and of course the music is basically all hsm-based, which means we get:
baku and deku performing a version of ‘what i’ve been looking for’
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uraraka and iida performing bop to the top during the ua entrance exam
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all of 1a doing status quo (and bashing their own quirks)
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todo having his breakdown during the sports festival fight with deku to a version of scream from hsm3
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uraraka performing when there was me and you about deku (complete with backup dancers)
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todo and deku singing the what i’ve been looking for reprise sfdlkklfdsjlksdlj some tododeku shippers produced this show for fuckin sure lmaoooo like they deadass put lyrics ‘my heart is trembling when you’re next to me’ sfdkldsfjkljkl
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AFTER WHICH BAKU DOES A RENDITION OF BET ON IT ABOUT DEKU OH MY GOD
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all might and deku doing a version of start of something new i’m-
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OBVIOUSLY the entire class 1a doing we’re all in this together complete with og dance moves ofc
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anyway if u want to watch something like bnha but at least ten times better, watch this i cannot stress that enough
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r0h1rr1m · 4 years
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rambly inception thoughts bc i watched this movie for like the fifth time this week and i can’t let it go
i just saw a lil post about an umbrella academy/inception crossover and that au is not really relevant to this but it made me think. i got to wondering whether someone w superpowers would be able to use them in a dream, or if that would violate the suspension of disbelief/make-no-waves rules and call the projections down on u. the specific rules of this mechanism--and of forging, and limbo, and lots of other stuff--have a definitively movie-logic ambiguousness to them, but let’s say that using powers in a dream, even if you have them in real life, stretches belief a little too much and angers the projections. it would also explain why (from a watsonian perspective, at least) dreamsharers don’t just give themselves fantastic abilites to make things easier. (i kinda wanna go off on another tangent about what that implies about who you have fool, be it dreamer or mark or both, and the effect of varying levels of imagination, but few enough people are gonna read this whole thing as is :’))
but then (in this extremely niche and overly specific hypothetical situation, yes, i’m sorry) if powered ppl using real powers in a dream would be too unbelievable, it follows that dreamsharers would have to be at least slightly more boring versions of themselves in a dream, probably less skilled and just less weird. real life is consistently stranger and more unexpected than imagination
this is where this veers off into unrelated territory a lil bit bc then i started imagining the conversation that would happen if Ariadne started figuring this out or if Eames told her. without any effort at good or in-character dialogue, it might go something like this:
A <<so then the stablest/most forgiving dreams would be of the people with the most imagination? like children?>>
E <<probably, but who would go in the mind of a child?>>
A <<u literally make a career made a career out of violating people in a way so profound u’d have to be clinically paranoid to even worry about protecting against it, but u draw the line there? at children? why is it okay to do it to adults?>>
and so on until i started having some characterization hcs. bc i see Eames as the coldest/most ruthlessly pragmatic character in the movie (i’ve had conversations where ppl argue it’s Cobb, but he’s not ruthless. he is, in fact, sabotaging his own career w an overabundance of ruth. he’s just desperate and making some kind of myopic justifications. like that scene early on in the first level? i get the distinct sense that when he’s blowing up at Arthur he’s overcompensating to separate himself from the blame of a situation for which he’s at least 50% but arguably more responsible for. sorry tangent over) and i don’t think he’d worry abt this too much.
he knows that he lives his life in a bit of a moral gray area and unless he wants to make sm srs changes to his lifestyle there’s not a lot of point stressing. he’s not like totally relativistic, bc relativism isn’t that useful and he’s pretty utilitarian (i think these words also have, like, official philosophical definitions but idk anything abt that n i’m not using em that way), but he’s aware that a moral code is a tricky thing, even for ppl who are not international career criminals. rules like “no kids as marks” are easy to follow, and make simple, instinctive sense. i think he’d make a lot of moral decisions js on gut feeling.
in the hypothetical convo above where he tells Ariadne as much, mbe he adds:
<<if u want to talk abt it w someone who’s actually thought abt this, i’m sure Arthur has, but i don’t think it’ll make u feel better>>
bc Arthur is mbe a bit too good at compartmentalizing and justifications (not like Cobb, tho. Arthur is loyal to a fault and dedicated to looking after other ppl in a way he seems generally disinterested in doing for himself), seeing as he’s apparently the kind of person who can cheerfully ID someone’s murderer to their face and then just casually switch topics after like 5 words of explanation.
he’s characterized as v focused on planning/details and thoroughness/coherency, so it tracks that he’d want to articulate/organize his thoughts on Why I Do What I Do, but the subjectivity of his justifications would be especially apparent to Ariadne after this convo w Eames. and like, “convince ur friend to go to therapy” and “follow ur friend around the globe enabling his increasingly aimless and self-destructive mission to break into ppl’s heads for money” are on opposite ends of a spectrum i don’t want to know anything about. js bc this dude gets prissy abt Eames js Feeling Things Out and is convinced he’s Mr. Logic doesn’t mean his logic isn’t absolutely fckn buck-wild.
so Ariadne’s reaction to all this is what? it’s highly unlikely anything could make her give up dreamshare, so. are there legit alternatives to the criminal side of things? in the movie it’s not rly clear. when Dom goes to Miles and says that becoming a fugitive took away his legitimate options for his skills, it seems like that would imply there are, in fact, legitimate options. but then why was Miles only training/able to suggest a normal ass architect and not a dreamshare Architect?
anyway, the point is if legit dreamshare work exists, Ari could hand the work of deciding on ethics and regulations off to a boss or legislation. whether or not she’d choose to do that i think is a matter of personal hc and the movie could support it either way. if on the other hand, tho, only illegal uses for dreamshare exist, she has to find her own moral guidelines in criminal work (i like the hc that Arthur helps her be more selective than a newbie would typically be allowed to be. helps her vet jobs and keep from getting in over her head/beholden to someone. it just seems like something he would do. and mbe his reputation needs a little repair after however long he ran w an increasingly unstable and unreliable Dom Cobb, but if ppl like Eames are still calling him the best pointman he must have enough clout to help Ari get some good jobs). for myself, i think even if there are legit jobs Ari would choose to stay on the illegal side of things anyway, at least at first. she’s addicted to the limitation-free aspect of it, and, in the proud tradition of geniuses and prodigies everywhere, she’s demonstrably bad at taking censure/advice. she has to make her own mistakes. not to mention, her own morals might be a lil wobbly anyway, from how easily and entitledly she invaded Dom’s privacy. like, it turned out to be for the best, but it was still kinda fcked up
anyway surprise i wasn’t working towards any sort of point but i can’t stop thinking abt this movie and my family’s sick of hearing about it. thanks for reading. vote
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chezforshire · 4 years
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sometimes you just wanna talk abt your ocs and that’s what i’m gonna freakin’ do
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First off are these two nerds, astrea (left) and kagang (right)
Astrea Maryam-Lalonde is the descendant of Kanaya. She’s a nerd just like her moms and loves to read and stuff. She’s good at meticulous work and stuff and loves drawing and writing stories. She’s a pretty cheeky little dork and is sassy as hell. She thinks being in a family of gods is the raddest thing and she’s kinda got the ‘I was born for destiny!’ anime protag mentality so yknow she’s pretentious about that.
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She’s got a pretty short temper and is ready to fight all the fucking time. Rose is just “man that was me when i was a kid, huh” and all the betas just nod and laugh at her. She loves learning shit and is always up to teaching people new things too but in a lot less pretentious way than Rose used to be, you know. She sometimes just goes “oh, i know some trivia about that stuff. wanna hear?” and if they say no then that’s the end of the convo but otherwise she unloads so much info on them. She loves drawing and Dave, Callie and Roxy helps her with her art and Dirk, along with Rose, helps her with writing. Jane taught her to cook and bake and she loves visiting her and June for pastries and when Karkat and Jake’s there they also watch movies and argue over the quadrants of the characters and the action scenes. Jake and Vriska take her out a lot for hikes and little escapades, sometimes Terezi tags along but mostly Terezi tells her about laws and stuff. Jade, Kanaya and Callie also teach her a lot about gardening and she just likes doing stuff that take a bit of effort and time, helps her be patient about things.
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This is Kagang Vantas-Strider. He’s an ecto-mix of Karks and Dave and it’s a whole thing that im still mulling over but yeah he’s half human-half troll and HOH so some people give him shit for that but then they look over their shoulders and see Astrea so yknow that’s fun. He used to be really shy but then grew up to be a little shit as well just like his dads lmao. He’s a bit of a prick in a way that he’s just subtly rude like he’ll be vague and subtweet you irl and he’s just open about his dislike of shit you do or say. Karkat kinda just looks at that and goes ‘wow that is my kid huh’ and kanaya just pats him
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He’s sort of a mellower and more patient version of Karkat when he was younger like he can be really really passionate about something and just keep talking about it for hours on end and just not let anyone interrupt him and defends things with fervor. He’s a passionate guy lmao. He’s also a pretty sentimental kid and keeps gifts around no matter how useless they are. Dirk used to be a little weird around him for Bro reasons but some talking and a really sad Kagang kinda kicked some sense into him and so makes him little things for fun. He likes music a whole fuckin’ lot and even gets violin lessons from Rose and piano lessons from June. Jade, Jake and Vriska take him out sometimes for little adventures like going out into the forest and just looking at fauna and flora. Jade, Terezi, Roxy and Callie tell him a lot about plants and history and he just kinda fuckin loves that shit and visits them a lot just to listen to that shit. He also asks a lot about troll and human biology to Kanaya and Jane, he likes that kinda shit and he thinks theyre the coolest fucking things.
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This is my precious little prick, hence I don’t draw them often I just think of them fondly lmao. Their name is Protan Isiara and theyre a pompous little purple blood that believes they can become the perfect leader of the world lmao. They used to be part of a pretty weird cult kinda thing that believes in the hemospectrum still and the god dude that the purple bloods believed in but a small mishap had them running into Vriska and Terezi when they were out adventuring and they just kinda looked at them and were like “This kid’s a prick. Let’s fix that.” and basically adopted them. The two kinda had them unlearn a lot of toxic stupid shit like the hemo-fucking-spectrum and also that the old ways of culling and other troll culture they only vaguely know about being the ‘best way to live’. They still want to be a leader and shit but they’re a whole lot kinder about it and realistic.
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They were picked up by the two when they were about 10 to 12 during one of Vriska and Terezi’s escapades out into the world and the three of them have been travelling together since then. They’re a bit shy about affection being given or when they give it out but they genuinely appreciate it and care about the people around them. They respect Vriska and Terezi very much along with the rest of the survivors after they meet them, but they hold a special place in their heart for the pair because they were the first they met outside their little cult. 
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They’re colorblind and i can’t remember what colors it was but they got those special glasses when the three of them went the nearest city after Terezi found out about it. They love being out and about, never really staying indoors for too long so they love taking up Jade and Jake’s offer for foraging or going to little adventures. They also love books and so they visit Kanaya and Rose a lot for book recommendations and even ask some from Dirk as well, and whenever they visit they love listening to Callie tell them stories, doesn’t really matter what it’s about they just love stories. They also just fucking love comedy for some fucking reason and they laugh at even the dumbest shit they fell for updog once and they haven’t stopped laughing at it so June and Jane are just the best freakin people to them they think their pranks are top tier shit. They think coding is some amazing shit and talk to Dirk and Roxy a lot about it though they are absolute dog shit at it but yknow keep tryin and all that. They’re just as interested in guns as the HarlEnglish and so the three of them just spend long hours talking about them and even going along with their outings looking at new stuff like that.
Anyway yeah these are my loser kids and i have another one sort of in my head but maybe I’ll deal with that some other time. I’m making a better ref for these losers for my prompt list next month so it’s been Kidsstuck city these past few days lmao
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