#it’s my birthday today and i’m trying to find the joy in it

[70th]

.

[pocketjoong]

❥𓂃𓏧BIRTHDAY SURPRISE

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (SYNOPSIS): Wooyung decides to surprise you on your birthday...twice!

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (PAIRING): Idol!Wooyoung x gn!reader

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (GENRE AND AU/TROPE): fluff. established relationship. a sprinkle of angst. sfw.

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (WARNINGS): just lots and lots of fluff. wooyoung is whipped for you.

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (WORD COUNT): 1.4k

ꕥ𓂃𓏧 (A/N): HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWINNIE @nebulousbrainsoup!! I hope you have the most amazing day ahead!! <3 I'm honeslty super super thankful to have met you, and it honestly makes me go 👁👄👁 when I look back at how far we've come in the last year (from being moots to being friends and you becoming a super important person to me). I love you so much and I hope you enjoy reading this lil wooyo floof!!

“Hi, love,” Wooyoung’s voice greets you warmly as the video call connects. In the background, the bustling activity of the other ATEEZ members winding down after their schedules in Japan is evident.

“Hi, Woo!” you reply, mustering a sleepy smile. You’d been woken by the vibrating of your phone and were about to turn it off when you realised who was calling you.

Upon hearing your voice, the ATEEZ members divert their attention to Wooyoung’s phone, their faces breaking into wide smiles upon recognizing who he was talking to.

“Look who’s here!” San exclaims excitedly, leaping over a couch to join Wooyoung. “Happy birthday!”

His cheerful words are echoed by the rest of the members, prompting Wooyoung to playfully complain about being beaten to the punch in wishing you.

“You should’ve wished them at midnight like I did,” Yeosang teases his friend, while Seonghwa smoothly intercepts the phone from him. “Happy birthday! Did this troublemaker wake you up? It’s probably super early where you are.” He frowns, trying to mentally calculate what time it is for you. “You’re like… more than half a day behind us, aren’t you?”

You grin at Seonghwa’s remark. “It’s all good; I needed to be up early anyway.”

“Why’s that? Isn’t it the weekend?” Yunho interjects, leaning in next to Seonghwa so that his face is visible to you.

“Your exams are done, so you can sleep in today! It’s your birthday after all,” Mingi adds, appearing on Seonghwa’s other side.

“I’m going out with friends for the day,” you explain.

“GIMME MY PHONE!!!” Wooyoung’s voice echoes through the screen, causing the other boys to flinch at the volume; you can also hear Hongjoong admonishing him to lower his voice. After a flurry of movement, Wooyoung reappears on the screen, having left the room. “Sorry about that. So, what else are you gonna do today?”

“I’m not sure honestly, my friends have a lot planned today, so I’m probably going to be with them for the rest of the day.”

“I wish I were there,” he sighs wistfully. Finding a table to perch on, Wooyoung hops onto it, yelping when it wobbles. You shake your head at his antics, cautioning him to be careful.

“I’m sorry I can’t be there for your birthday, love,” Wooyoung’s voice carries a hint of melancholy.

“It’s okay, honestly. I wasn’t there for your birthday either. Even though I tried to get a couple of days off from uni to go see you in Seoul,” you reply, offering him a reassuring smile. “When you come back here in a few weeks, we can go out and celebrate both our birthdays. Or stay in to do that. I wouldn’t mind either.”

“Let’s do that.”

Just then, the doorbell rings, and you frown in confusion; you aren’t been expecting anyone this early. Your friends had told you to be ready by 10, which is almost 4 hours away. Making small talk with Wooyoung, you head to the door to see who’s at the door.

“There’s a delivery for you,” the man at the door announces, presenting you with a beautiful bouquet of red geraniums, pink ranunculus, and white gardenias. Along with it, he hands you a small box from your favorite bakery.

Taking the gifts inside, you eagerly look through the bouquet for a card, your eyes lighting up with joy when you find one. Lost in the moment, you momentarily forget about Wooyoung, unaware of the silence that had fallen over the call.

My dearest,

Happy Birthday! Words fail to express just how thankful I am for your existence. I’m sorry that I can’t celebrate your day with you in person today, but I hope this small gesture can bring you even a fraction of the joy you bring into my life.

With this bouquet, I wanted to convey the depths of my love and admiration for you. Each day, I am profoundly grateful that fate brought us together, even if it began with the clumsy spill of coffee on your favorite white hoodie (my sincerest apologies for that).  I wouldn’t change it for the world because it gave me the greatest gift of my life: you.

Please enjoy your day to the fullest and celebrate yourself! I hope you can feel the love I’m sending from across the ocean.

Yours, always,

Wooyoung

P.S. I’ve also included assorted cupcakes from your beloved bakery!

Unbeknownst to you, tears well up in your eyes and a single droplet cascades down your cheek, landing softly on the card. Startled, you brushed the tear away, your gaze shifting to Wooyoung’s face on your phone screen.

“I love you,” you manage to say, too choked up to say anything else.

A warm smile spreads across Wooyoung’s face. “I love you too, tears and all.”

“You’re so unserious,” you teased, mustering a laugh despite the tears. “But thank you for this. It truly made my day.”

“Now, what are you waiting for?” Wooyoung’s playful tone fills the air once more. “Light a candle on that cupcake so I can serenade you with the best performance of ‘Happy Birthday’ that you’ve ever heard.”

A sudden clatter startles you awake, pulling you from the depths of slumber. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you wonder about the source of the noise, your mind still foggy with sleep. A muttered curse sends a jolt of apprehension through you – you are supposed to be alone. Quietly, you slip out of bed, reaching for your pepper spray and phone, prepared for the worst.

To your surprise, the intruder in the kitchen isn’t a stranger. Instead, you find a familiar black-haired figure rummaging through the refrigerator.

“Wooyoung?” you call out, lowering your defenses as you recognized the figure.

Caught off guard by your presence, Wooyoung jumps at the sound of your voice, accidentally bumping his head in the process.

“Ouch, love, why did you have to scare me like that?” Wooyoung pouts, massaging the back of his head as he turns to face you. His expression shifts from playful to apprehensive as he registers your presence.

“Well?” you prod, curious about his unexpected appearance in your kitchen considering he’s supposed to be in Japan and not in your kitchen. “What are you doing?”

“I was attempting to whip up some pancakes, but I seem to have botched it,” he confesses sheepishly, presenting the thin batter that fails to resemble pancake mix. “I may have gone overboard with the milk, and it appears we’re fresh out of pancake mix…”

“I do have more in the pantry, actually,” you chuckle at his bashful smile, handing him the unopened box. “What brings you here, though? Weren’t you supposed to return to Seoul later tomorrow?”

“I might have sweet-talked manager-nim into letting me come to see you earlier,” he confesses, pouring a cup of mix into the bowl and muttering a small ‘yay’ as it reaches the perfect consistency. “I couldn’t make it in time for your birthday, though. I had to take a connecting flight from LA, and then the drive was kinda long...”

“I’m not complaining. Now that you’re here, I’m not planning on letting you go,” you tease, wrapping your arms around his waist and burying your face into the warmth of his neck from behind.

“That doesn’t sound too bad, honestly,” he says with a smile, turning around in your embrace and gently rubbing his nose against your cheek before placing a tender kiss there. Unable to resist any longer, he leans in and plants a playful kiss on your lips. You can’t help but giggle as Wooyoung lifts you onto the counter, his hand tracing over your thighs.

“I missed you so much,” he murmurs against your lips, playfully nipping at them. Then, with a teasing flick of his tongue over your bottom lip, he pulls away and gestures toward the dining table. “Go sit down, or I’ll never finish breakfast.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault you can’t resist me,” you tease, playfully dodging when he attempts to catch you.

“The pancake is burning, you goof. Go rescue it,” you point toward the kitchen, hoping he’d heed your words.

Wooyoung shoots you a playful glare, torn between saving the pancake and indulging in a tickle fight. Duty wins over mischief, and you breathe a sigh of relief as he hurries off.

“I hope you know that I’m not letting this go so easily,” he calls back with a mischievous grin.

[sthavoc]

Hi bestie!! Can I please request this It’s Enzo’s birthday party at a club and you’re friends but not like besties and of course you have a huge crush so during the party he tries to spend a lot of time with you and you’re like is this real? but a lot of friends and girls are congratulating him so he steps away.

So when he comes back to you he says “I know what I want as my present” and you’re nervous like ok ? and he goes “I want a kiss” so you smirk playfully and say “oh sure close your eyes” and you kiss his forehead and he looks at you like stop messing with me and you go “oh is this not what your looking for ? Maybe you want this ?” And you kiss idk his cheek and you get closer and closer to his mouth until he says “don’t tease me you’re gonna regret it “ and you’re like “prove it “

And bam. Sparks fly. 🎆🎇

My inspiration was this video honestly he looks so good ! Thank youuuuu

https://x.com/enzovarchive/status/1767580921610268732?s=46&t=RPVpXPGkWnVvjZR8AmB-Qw

🎉꡴ 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓 | ENZO VOGRINCIC

·˚ ༘ pairing: enzo x fem!reader

·˚ ༘ summary: for enzo’s birthday there is only one thing he asks and wishes for, a kiss from you.

·˚ ༘ warnings: teasing.

·˚ ༘ note: guys I’m so lateeee but I still can’t believe enzo turned 31. he looks so good in that videooo. where I live it’s still enzo’s birthday so I decided to still post something. I’m so sorry if I have any grammar mistakes, I didn’t have time to proofread.

Today was Enzo’s birthday. You couldn’t help but feel the excitement pump through your veins as you stood in front of the man, your heart fluttering with joy as well. The devoted attention only made your heart go faster and the thoughts that were rambling all over your brain couldn’t be controlled.

You couldn’t believe that Enzo instead of spending his birthday dancing and hanging out with the rest of his friend group was spending it with you, out of all people. It was surprising because the both of you were not that close as much as the rest of the cast, and even if you weren’t you still couldn’t help but gain the feelings you accumulated.

“espérame tantito chiquita, ya regreso.” Enzo walked away quickly to be able to greet the people who were arriving at the club for his birthday.

He had been going back and forth in greeting, but he would always come back to you. Tons of girls were trying to flirt with him and being touchy but he would find a way to shut them out and come back to you.

You waited stirring your drink patiently with your hand resting above your chin. “No me imagine que fuera a venir demasiada gente.” His voice crashes your thoughts but immediately makes a smile appear on your lips.

“Pues te lo mereces.” The soft smile continues on your lips as you watch him, he as well smiling at you. “¿Te la estás pasando bien?”

“De masiado.” He drinks. “Pero te aseguro que to tan bien como ellos.” He points to the guys.

They were all gathered in a huge circle causing a riot. Their screams of enjoyment filled the area and the voices of singing did as well. They were for sure drunk.

“Hmm. ¿Y que te dieron?” You make a motion with your chin towards the birthday bag that he had placed over the bar table.

“Un perfume, o algo así.” He shrugged squinting his eye for a split second. His next sentence followed after a sip of his drink, something that made you think. “¿Te acordas que me preguntaste algunas veces que quería para mi cumpleaños?”

“¿Ah huh?” You nod not thinking so much about it.

His eyes stared into nothing else but your eyes. “ Ya se lo que quiero”

His look made you a tad nervous, swallowing you replied. “¿Y que es?” but his answer was the cherry on top for your nervousness.

“Un beso tuyo.” He smirked as he noticed your reaction, but you thought, two can play that game. You weren’t sure if it was the alcohol.

“¿Un beso?” Your lips reflected his smirk as you stared at him. Was he getting closer? or was it the tension that was growing?

“Sí.” He passes his tongue through his lips wetting them.

You had thought about wanting to kiss Enzo, there was no denying it. But for it to ever happen was never in your thoughts, for you guys never spoke on the daily or for hours.

The bit of alcohol you had in you was giving you the confidence you needed.

“Dale.” You nod followed by a smirk, but thought of something. “Cierra los ojos.”

He did as follows, and obviously what he didn’t see coming was that you got closer to his forehead instead of his lips. This action made his eyes instantly open and made you giggle.

Enzo let out a small sigh as he smiled again, his eyes talked more than his mouth. A look that told you he didn’t want to be messed around with anymore.

“¿Oh eso no es lo que quieres? Quizás, ¿es esto?” You let out with a hint of tease in your voice.

Your lips met his cheek but they slowly began to move towards his lips, staying close to his but not moving.

“Ya no juegues chiquita, lo vas a lamentar.” He whispered with his hot breath hitting you making you swallow.

He was challenging, and that’s what you liked about Enzo. He would prove what he was capable of doing.

“Pruébalo.” You say.

And you didn’t need to tell the man twice. His hand went towards the back of your neck pulling you towards him to cut the space that was left between the both of you. Kissing Enzo felt like a craving you were finally able to eat, a problem you were finally able to solve, and the satisfaction that came after that felt amazing.

He would constantly bite your lip but you didn’t stay behind, as so would you.

But the two of you remembered where the both of you were so you cut the kiss. Your lips couldn’t help to form a soft dumb smile, the plumpness of them was noticeable to Enzo as he passed his finger through your bottom lip, this made him bring you back for another kiss that caught you by surprise.

“Otro regalito que quería.” He whispers making the two of you chuckle.

“Feliz cumpleaños Enzo.” You looked him in the eyes as both of your hands rested on his shoulders.

To Enzo, this was the best gift he had received through the whole night because it came from you and it was you.

[crackedpumpkin]

𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐌𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬 | 𝟎𝟓 |

a/n: okok im sorry this series is lowkey super slow i promise it gets better without compromising on the soulmate stuff aight <3

[ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 ] | [ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ] | [ 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ]

“Should I grapes?” 

Your dad blinks. “I beg your pardon?” Squinting at the bunch of grapes in your hand, your foggy mind tries to comprehend what you are trying to ask. Eventually, you get there, the lost words finding their way back to you.

“Should I eat grapes?”

“If you want, just be sure not to be late for school.” He shrugs, taking a sip of coffee. He holds it out, offering some to you. Shaking your head dismissively, you tiptoe and grab the container of ground coffee, placing it down on the counter. “Order up,” He jokes, watching you prep the coffee for the espresso machine.

You’d gotten it as a gift on your nineteenth birthday, having picked it out yourself online before heading down to the store with your dad to buy it. It’s your baby, your pride and joy, and you’d use it to its fullest potential each time. 

There’s even a dedicated rack of syrups and other things you’d purchased online, but you always made an iced latte in the mornings. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have the strength to get through the day. 

“I’ve got my first session today with Master Wu, so I’ll probably be back late.” You inform him, sitting down at the table after making yourself a vanilla latte. Emily's already made a plate of French toast that he’s munching on, having saved two slices for you.

You eat it regardless, choosing not to acknowledge this fact. A glance at the clock tells you that you’ve got plenty of time to finish up and make your way over to the university. You mentally tick off the checklist in your head, assured that you’ve completed most of, if not all, your work and assignments. 

Although, that wouldn’t stay true for very long. The professor in your third lesson would probably give you yet another essay. At least you get off school early, which means that you’d have plenty of time before your lessons with Master Wu would start. 

“Have you made any new friends yet?” 

The remains of toast in your hands halt halfway to your mouth, eyes flitting from it to your dad’s inquisitive gaze. Slowly, you bring it to your mouth and bite off a piece, averting your gaze and chewing slowly.

He sets down his phone, the morning news displayed on the bright screen. Clearing his throat, he takes another swig of coffee before massaging the area between his eyes. “Did you get into a fight? At least tell me you won.”

“I did not get into a fight,” you say with mild outrage, offended he’d even consider the option. “And for your information, I have made two new friends.” you point the crust of the french toast at him with a frown. 

He leans back in his chair with a raised brow. “What are their names?”

Crap.

“For your information, they prefer to not have their names disclosed. Confidentiality reasons.” To be fair, you aren’t exactly lying, per se. It’s somewhat true. The ninja are technically your new friends now, right? And you can’t just reveal their names, it’d destroy the whole point of a secret identity.

You nod absentmindedly, your thoughts making perfect logical sense in your head. The coffee is almost gone from your cup, and you peek at the espresso machine that’s practically calling your name. Surely there’s time for another cup, right?

“Sometimes I wonder if I dropped you on the head as a baby.” He mumbles with a tilt of his head, though the corners of his mouth hint at an amused smile. “Even if I did, I’m pretty sure I’d have taken you to the doctor’s. I think.” 

Casting him an odd look, you shrug and quickly do the dishes. Realising there isn’t enough time to make another cup of coffee, you decide to head out to your first few classes of the day. 

“Be back by 8!” You call out at the doorway, slipping a finger into the back of your sneakers to help shove them over your heel. The tote bag almost hits you in the face as you lean down, narrowly avoiding it and swinging open the door.

Warm sunlight greets your skin, happiness rushing through your veins as you pop in your earbuds and make your way to the university. Each step has a slight spring to it, and the colours all around are surprisingly more vibrant than usual. Delicious scents warm the air as you pass by Chinatown, mentally marking it down to visit another day.

With your entire being brimming with joy, there’s surely nothing that can go wrong, right?

— — — — — 

Wrong. 

This is all very wrong. 

“And I was telling her all about how the professor is a total quack! Right?” Your body tilts to the side as someone shoves it teasingly, almost falling off the chair then and there. Mustering all the energy you have left, you lift your head and take a deep breath, plastering on the brightest smile you can muster. 

Abby sits next to you, the table crowded with students. “Anyway, did you know she’s taking lessons from Master Wu??” The entire table gasps in shock, you included (sarcastically, of course. But it went unnoticed, unfortunately). 

She gives you an odd look, tossing your response aside in favour of talking excitedly about how one time one of the ninjas saved her from a falling building or something of the like - you weren’t paying attention. 

Instead, you’re busy planning for a way to escape from the group. You’re not even sure how you ended up here in the first place. One moment, you got paired up for an assignment with Abby, and the next, you’re sitting down in one of the food courts around campus after she found out you had lessons with Master Wu after school.

In hindsight, it was stupid of you to reveal that. Back home, no one cared if you had connections to a celebrity, unless they actually showed up. You’d subconsciously let down your guard, and now everyone’s bombarding you with questions about the ninja.

“So, is it true that Kai uses hairspray and not gel?”

“Does Zane eat?”

“Can you help me get Nya’s shirt??”

That was probably the final straw. You clear your throat and instantly everyone quiets down, waiting with bated breath for your reply. Pausing for a moment, you smile as you part your lips to speak.

“I’m gonna be late for class.” 

Taking advantage of the silence that follows while they process your short reply, you grab your bag and run, leaving them behind. It’s not long before chagrined voices start to complain, feeling only slightly guilty for Abby who’s left behind to salvage the social situation.

That wouldn’t be hard for her though, you suspect. She seems to be a social butterfly, which works out great, but also horrible, considering that she pretty much dragged you there. Wanting to make friends is a goal you want to cross off, but not this way.

The rest of the morning passes by fast, but your mental stamina starts to drain more and more with each passing hour. Finally, the professor releases you for the day, with the bright and cheery smile she gets from seeing her students suffer, like all professors do.

The classroom fills with chatter as the students all leave until you’re the only one left trying to stuff the laptop into your tote bag. A sudden tap on your shoulder makes you flinch, turning in surprise to see a brunette standing behind you.

She fiddles with something in her hands, eyes darting everywhere but at you. “Can I help you?” The moment you speak, she flinches a little, taking a visible breath before pressing her lips together determinedly.

“Hi, I’m Holly. You left this behind in the food court earlier…I was sitting at another table.”

“Oh, thanks,” you say with mild surprise, taking the student pass she holds out with a grateful smile. “I wouldn’t be able to get in the classrooms tomorrow if not for you,” you joke, waving it at her with a wink.

She seems to ease up, shoulders visibly relaxing as she laughs. “How’d you get into the classroom today then?” You shrug.

“I was behind someone else who was headed in the same direction and got too lazy to pull out the card, so I asked them to open it for me. Luckily, he was in the same class.”

“That’s so fair,” She replies with a wise nod. “Anyway, it’s nice to meet you. I’m in this class too. It’d be great if you could consider me as a project partner sometime!” 

Humming, you thoughtfully mull the idea over before nodding. “Sounds good to me. I gotta head off now though. I’ll see you around Holly.”

“See you!” She waves you off as you rush out the door, an odd warmth in your chest. Thinking back to your interaction with her makes you smile. She hadn’t asked about Master Wu or the ninja…

Maybe she might just be your first friend.

— — — — — 

The climb up the steep steps of the mountain is the usual, though this time you’re supercharged by the thought of having potentially met your very first friend in school. Even your loud knock on the monastery doors sounds cheery.

Zane opens the door, surprise written on his face at your bright smile, though maybe your flushed cheeks and beads of sweat rolling down your face don’t help convey it. “Hey there buddy,” you greet.

“Hello there friend! You arrived early today. Do you need a shower?”

You shake your head, walking inside and instantly being greeted by the regulated cooling system that keeps everything at the ideal temperature they decided. “I’ll just sweat it all out. Hey, is Cole around? I gotta return something to him.” 

“He’ll be back soon from patrol. In the meantime, why don’t you come and grab a drink?” Zane offers, leading the way at your eager nod. The moment you walk to the doorway leading inside, Zane pauses, turning to stare at you.

“...Can I help you?” 

He tilts his head slightly, eyes narrowing as if contemplating what to say. “I do not mean to offend you, but I strongly advise taking a shower. It is not that you smell bad, but you will need it, based on my personal experience.”

Crossing your arms, you raise a brow at him. "Are you saying I smell like a gym sock?"

He hesitates. "...No. I'm just saying that most people who climb up the mountain end up smelling like a gym sock and usually shower afterwards."

Flinching slightly, you press your lips together into a thin line. "Touché, ninja. Touché."

You take the lead, your body vaguely remembering where the bathroom is from your last visit. The shower is a separate room inside the bathroom, ensuring the utmost privacy for whoever uses it. 

“Here, you can change into these after.” Zane hands a set of clothes toward you from a drawer. Accepting them gladly, you head to the bathroom and lock the door. Taking a quick shower, your body welcomes the lukewarm water that flows down your skin, dripping off your fingertips. 

Upon changing into the loose black shirt and training pants, you secure the latter by pulling the strings and tying them tightly so they won’t fall. Zane nods in approval once you step out more refreshed than before, tossing the towel in the laundry basket off to the side. 

“Thanks, I’ll be sure to wash and return these.” Lifting your arms and swinging them back and forth a little creates a slight gust of wind that cools down your armpits wonderfully. That, combined with the sunny weather outside, is a picturesque scene for training. 

He shakes his head with a smile. “There is no need. Feel free to keep them. We have too many clothes here, and it’s better to give them freely.” 

Slightly odd response, but who are you to question their recycling decisions? Choosing to take it as is, you grin and continue the walk to the dojo. Zane waves goodbye to you, sliding the door shut. 

Master Wu sits in the middle of the room with a cup of tea, sipping away in peace and calm. Approaching him, you automatically bow a full ninety degrees. The practice was drilled into you until it was almost instinct, especially if you were indirectly rude. Sometimes, you can still feel the screaming pain of your thighs crying out for mercy, forced to remain in a training position as punishment.

Rising from the bow, you hesitate slightly, waiting for Master Wu to acknowledge your presence. His eyes remain closed, his breathing deep and steady, embodying the very essence of tranquillity. After what feels like an eternity, he opens his eyes and meets your gaze with a serene smile.

“Sit,” he says softly, gesturing to the mat across from him. You comply, folding your legs underneath you and trying to mirror his calm.

“You have come far in your journey,” Master Wu begins, setting down his cup. “But there is always more to learn. You are skilled with the blade, but true mastery requires understanding beyond the sword.”

He rises gracefully. “Today, we will focus on adaptability,” Master Wu explains, “Kendo teaches you to be direct and powerful, but sometimes, you must flow like water.” He walks over to the empty wall and presses a hidden button.

A section of the wall moves, smoothly rotating to reveal a wall or neatly displayed weapons on the other side. He grabs two wooden swords, throwing one at you. Your hands reach out to grab it as you stand, shifting into your stance.

“Now, we shall spar.”

What?

Before you can blink, a sharp pain blooms on the side of your torso. Stumbling back a few steps, you gulp in a mouthful of air as you process what’s just happened. Master Wu is only a few steps away from you, the sword in his hand no longer there for a light demonstration. 

You ready yourself, thankful he’s given you a few moments to breathe. The pain still throbs, ignoring it to focus on him. The blade stills in your vision, fingers tightly gripping the handle. It’s barely another second before you swing the blade, charging toward his nonchalant figure.

With a swift, fluid motion, Master Wu deflects your strike effortlessly, redirecting your momentum and causing you to stumble past him. His movements are smooth and unhurried, a stark contrast to your forceful approach.

"Adapt," he advises calmly, "Use your opponent's energy against them."

You turn quickly, regaining your balance and taking a deep breath. This time, you focus on the flow of his movements, watching for an opening. He remains relaxed, his stance fluid and ready. You feint to the right, then pivot to the left, aiming a strike at his side.

He counters with ease, the wooden swords clacking together sharply. Instead of resisting, you let the force of his parry guide your movements, spinning around and striking from a different angle. His eyes light up with approval as he blocks again, your movements starting to resemble a dance more than a duel.

"Good," he says, his voice steady. "Feel the flow. Do not fight it."

You continue sparring, each strike and block becoming more instinctive. He still lands more than his fair share of hits, while your wooden blade barely brushes against the fabric of his robes. Gritting your teeth at the sharp blow dealt to your leg, you tense every muscle in your body and continue to spar.

The sounds of your wooden blades clashing fill the air, your heavy breathing included. The fluidity and grace in his motions piss you off, a stark contrast to the rigid discipline of Kendo. 

Why won’t he let me hithimgodfuckingdamnit-

A slight bonk on the side of your head snaps you out of your thoughts, skidding back and breathing heavily as you process it. “...Did you just hit my head?”  

Master Wu blinks. “Yes.” 

Then he strikes again, this time a slightly gentler hit on your calf, compared to the previous ones. You’re not sure whether to be thankful or frustrated - he’d just shown you how severely lacking you are, after all. 

“We shall take a break,” he announces. It’s only then when you lower your sword that you notice the abundance of sweat dripping down your face, your back completely soaked. You collapse to the ground, legs sprawled out as you finally get the chance to catch your breath.

As you continue to practically gulp in mouthfuls of air, you turn to look at Master Wu who’s sitting down with another cup of tea. “I have a question.” He hums curiously, raising a brow. “Why’re you teaching me this and not Kendo?” 

Hell yeah, drop that old man wisdom on me.

“The strikes and stances of kendo are ingrained in your muscles,” He explains, “but it does not mean you are invincible. Kendo has its strengths, but it also has its weaknesses. By learning to be fluid with your movements, you will become a better fighter than before.”

He tilts the teapot, pouring tea into a separate cup which he then holds out to you. Summoning all the strength in your body to crawl (yes, crawl. It’s embarrassing, but you’re truly too tired to care) to the small table, you pull yourself up and sit opposite him. 

Without thinking twice, you tilt the cup back and down it in a single gulp, exhaling happily as it goes down your throat and warms your body.

Opening your eyes, you spot Master Wu’s bemused gaze, freezing momentarily before offering him the empty cup with a sheepish smile.

He fills it up at your silent request, letting it pass. “Your body is that of a cup. It can only hold so much, but once you break past your limits, you can expand its capacity.”

You nod slowly, the warmth of the tea seeping into your bones, easing the aches from your recent sparring. "So, I need to break my limbs?" That’s probably not what he's trying to get at, from the way his eyes widen at your response.

“Not at all,” he chuckles, “challenge yourself. Learn as much as you can. Then, make it your own. That is why I am teaching you. Not just because of your stepmother, and not just in the name of self-defence. You enjoy it, don’t you?”

Pursing your lips, you choose to sip quietly. He’d seen through you as easily as glass. You wouldn’t easily admit it to anyone, but you missed the intense training and the time spent sparring with your previous master. 

The blood rushing through your veins and the sweat dripping down your brow every time gave you a rush of adrenaline you’d grown addicted to.

Now, it’s hard to refrain from. That’s not to say you’d do it every day of the week of course, but at its core, you found it fun.

“Ah, Cole.” He greets, raising his cup. You tense, turning back to see the Earth Ninja all dressed up in his gi. He takes off the hood, mirroring the baffled expression on your face. “Just in time.”

Cole approaches the both of you, bowing to Master Wu and sitting beside you. He looks over, eyes filled with surprise at your presence. Lifting your cup, you offer it to him in a show of good relations. “Tea?”

He shakes his head in refusal. Shrugging, you retract your offer and sip away.

Only to choke when you see him take out a cup of his own. Master Wu seems unfazed, pouring the tea into his cup as if it were the norm to carry it around. “Dude, do you keep that on you?” 

He raises a brow at the pure amusement in your voice. “You got a problem with that?” 

“No, not at all.” You reply, pressing your lips together to hide the growing smile on your face. “I’m sure you’ve good reason to do so. Like urgent tea sessions or when the kitchen doesn’t have any more vessels for beverages.” You add with a solemn nod.

First Papa’s, now this? What next, an emergency blanket?

“Okay, snob. I bet you don’t have your own cup, anyway.” He retorts with a huff, rolling his eyes.

“For your information, I happen to have the best mug in the world. It was a birthday gift, not sure if you’ve ever had one though.” 

“A mug? As a birthday gift? What are you, lame?” He snorts, shaking his head in amusement.

“Where the hell do you keep it anyway? Won’t it get crushed because of all the fighting and stuff?” You ask, choosing to change the topic. He goes along with it (thank god), taking a sip before explaining that he puts it in a pouch that’s designed to turn stiff when pressure is placed on it.

Master Wu interrupts your discussion by clearing his throat and peeking an eye open. Cole Instantly straightens his back, delivering his report on the day’s patrol. “Anyway, I’ll get going now.” He starts to get up, only to pause when Master Wu puts forth a suggestion.

“Why don’t you stay and have a spar with her?”

“Me? Spar with her?” He looks you up and down, taking in your flushed cheeks and sweat-ridden body. “Won’t she collapse?”

Your lips part in a silent gasp, offended by his tone. “Excuse me,” you haul yourself off the floor with a grunt, taking a step forward and jabbing a finger into his chest. “I’ll have you know that I can beat your ass any day.”

He smirks, pushing aside your arm and taking a step forward, leaving barely any space between your bodies. “I’d like to see you try.” Your eyes narrow into a glare, infuriated by the smugness in his eyes. 

Another cough interrupts you both, breaking your gaze and turning to see Master Wu’s raised brows as he stares at the both of you. You hastily take a step back, pushing him away in the process. 

He lifts a hand and brushes off the imaginary dust left by your finger. You glare at him, grabbing the sword that lies at Master Wu’s side. You toss it to him, frowning when he catches it with ease without being caught off guard by the sudden toss.

Walking over to an empty spot in the dojo, you breathe in slowly, sucking in the cool air through your teeth. “Remember, true strength lies not just in power, but in the ability to adapt and flow,” Master Wu advises from the side, using his cane as a division between you both.

Your form is almost perfect, every muscle tense as you grip the handle of your sword with determination. You would not let this bastard get the upper hand on you. Even if he is a ninja, he can’t always be on his toes the whole time.

“Begin.” 

In the split moment that Master Wu’s command rings through the air, you lift the sword and strike. Cole manages to barely dodge it, the gust of wind generated by the powerful blow moving a few strands of his hair across his face.

He does a backflip, landing perfectly on his feet and holding the sword out in defence. He chuckles wryly. “Not bad for a musketeer.” Your cheeks warm at the reference, recalling the night he’d found you in that hole not too long ago caused by the very thief who snuck into the fundraiser. 

“Very funny, Earth Ninja. Am I supposed to applaud?” You ask sarcastically, lunging forward and striking once more. He parries easily, only for you to use the momentum to aim a kick at the back of his legs.

He stumbles to the ground, landing on his knees before bolting back up again with a glint in his eyes. “Fair point. I guess we’ll be doing this seriously after all. Don’t chicken out.” 

“Are you sure you should be saying that?” You fake a sympathetic pout, tilting your head in pity. “Don’t you need ointment for those bruises first?”

The ghost of an amused smile flickers across his face, holding his sword up and moving toward you once more. The blades clash with a resounding knock, the vibrations travelling through the wood and into your hands. They tremble slightly, neither of you willing to give way to the other. 

“Wanna make a bet?” He suggests through gritted teeth, though you can tell he probably isn’t using his full strength. You’d heard about his supposed ‘super-strength’ through Melody’s rambles, and you’d rather die than admit that you’re grateful he isn’t using it.

Contemplating it through heavy breaths and aching muscles, you decide to accept. Not readily though, of course. “What’re the stakes?” You ask, before using his weight against him and side-stepping out of the way to nail a punch at his side.

He dodges it easily, leaving you to groan in frustration before putting some distance between you both. Barely a second later, your swords clash again, this time with an emotion resembling that of humour behind either of your intentions. 

“Loser buys dinner.” 

Deeming it an acceptable bet with a nod, your mind races with ways that you could potentially win. Drop the sword and surprise him with a punch? Try to kick his feet? Deal more strikes, but swifter and faster than before?

Unfortunately, fate is unkind to you as always. Before you can react fast enough, he twists his body sideways, bending low and using the blunt of the blade to deal a sharp hit to your abdomen. 

It knocks the wind out of you. You’re barely able to defend yourself before he sweeps his leg, knocking yours from under you and making you land on your back. Your body erupts with coughs as you try to catch your breath, your chest heaving.

“Looks like I’ve won.” He shrugs, nonchalant words accompanied by the smug grin on his face you wish you could wipe off.

With the tip of the blade pointed at your throat, you raise your hands in surrender, rolling your eyes in the process. “Motherfucker,” you mumble under your breath, accepting the hand he holds out to you regardless. 

He helps you up, ignoring the way you purposely put more weight behind your grip in an attempt to drag him to the ground. Giving up, you stand of your own accord, hissing in pain at the way your chest stings from that last blow dealt.

“Well done, both of you. Your lesson is now over. I will see you again next week. Perhaps Cole too, if he wishes to join” Master Wu states with a knowing smile, exiting through another door and leaving the both of you behind.

You share a look, staring at the door he’s just left through. 

“You don’t think…” 

“Nah,” you shake your head with a nervous laugh. “There’s no way he knows. You didn’t tell him, right?”

“No way,” Cole denies instantly, shaking his head aggressively.

“Okay, damn. Don’t gotta be so strung up about it…” You grumble, crossing your arms. A twinge of hurt blooms in the pit of your stomach, but you choose to push it away, focusing on putting the weapons back onto the wall. Fumbling around for the hidden switch, you’re interrupted by a familiar hand pressing its exact spot, the wall rotating back to hide them once more.

He turns back to you with an expectant look. Tensing, you can already hear the money in your bank account beginning to fly away. Releasing a breath, you pinch the space between your brows. “Where to?” You ask in defeat.

“I’ll tell you that after you shower.” Looking up to see Cole’s wrinkled nose, you spot him subtly fanning the air. “You’re stinkin’ up the place right now.”

That’s it. I’m gonna punch him, ninja or not.

— — — — — 

Taglist: @candyquokka @mattchka @em-100 @cursedreader @alicesmile1 @alexa24 @raegreenie4 @burdeningbitch @viennasthings @cadencannot @ml3czqo @nanasemo @certified-cole-simp @beescomet @theblindhag @mitbin24 @sweetlittlebumblebree @brooklyniswriting @cantbecreative @something-else3 @iinlovewithfictionalppl @itz-moonlight

[doumadono]

Hii!! I wanna send an emergency request and I'm sorry if it's too much or anything but a week ago it was my birthday and the exact same day my grandma passed away. My grandma is one of the people dearest and close to me so losing her,especially on my birthday, It hurts alot. My birthday wasn't happy that day, usually my grandma would bake me a cake and my favorite foods that would always bring me joy and now it's gone, she's gone and I can't do anything about it but accept. I was wondering if you could do Katsuki comforting gn!reader? I really appreciate if you do. 💕

"Lean on me" - Bakugo x gn!Reader

A/N: I’m so so sorry for your loss. Your grandma sounds like an incredible person who brought so much joy to your life. It’s okay to grieve and miss her deeply. Hold on to those cherished memories and allow yourself to feel all the emotions

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST - PART 2

The sun had long since dipped below the horizon, casting the dorm room in a gentle twilight. The only sound was the soft rustling of pages turning as you sat curled up on the sofa, trying to distract yourself with a book. Yet, the words blurred together, your mind too occupied with the heavy weight of grief to focus.

Your birthday had always been a day of joy, a day filled with laughter, homemade cakes, and your grandma's warm embrace. But this year, the day had taken a cruel turn. The news of her passing still echoed in your mind, a constant reminder of the irreplaceable loss you had suffered.

A gentle knock on your door pulled you from your thoughts. Before you could respond, the door creaked open, and Katsuki Bakugo, your classmate, walked in. "Hey, nerd," he said, his voice gruff yet unusually gentle. "Mind if I join you?"

You nodded, managing a small, grateful smile as he settled beside you.

For a moment, the two of you sat in silence, the unspoken words hanging heavy in the air.

"I know today was supposed to be different," Katsuki began, his voice low and steady. "And I know it hurts like hell. Losing someone you love, especially like this... It's not something you just get over, goddammit."

You glanced up at him, surprised by the depth of understanding in his words.

Katsuki had always been tough, sometimes even abrasive, but in this moment, he was showing a side of himself you rarely saw.

"I don't have any magic words to make it better," he continued, his eyes meeting yours. "But I can tell you this - it's okay to feel like crap. It's okay to miss her, to cry, to be angry. You're allowed to feel everything you're feeling."

A tear rolled down your cheek, and Katsuki reached out, brushing it away with surprising gentleness. "She loved you. And she wouldn't want you to be alone right now."

You nodded, unable to speak past the lump in your throat, and more tears streamed down your flushed cheeks.

"Remember the good times," your friend said softly. "The way she smiled, the way she made you laugh. Keep those memories close. They don't replace her, but they can help you carry on."

His words were like a balm to your aching heart. You leaned into him, finding solace in his warmth and strength while you choked yourself on your own tears. "It's not fair!"

Katsuki wrapped an arm around you, holding you close as you let the tears flow freely. "I know, Y/N. But I'm here for you," he murmured. "Not just today, but every goddamn day. Whatever you need, whenever you need it. Just tell me, yeah?"

For a while, you simply sat there, finding comfort in Katsuki's steady presence. The pain of your loss was still there, a deep, aching void, but his support made it a little more bearable.

Eventually, the tears subsided, leaving you feeling exhausted but a little lighter. You looked up at Katsuki, offering him a small, grateful smile. "Thanks," you whispered. "I just hope I'll be able to... You know... To go through this."

"You're strong, and you'll get through this, no doubt here. And I'll be right here with you, little nerd. And you can always lean on me."

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Your Savior

Pairing: Cop!Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.9k

Warnings: angst, being taken hostage at gunpoint, fearful of your life

Request by @jessicalynnann: What about cop/detective dean and him and the reader are in an established relationship and she owns a cute little bakery… well what if something happens like she gets attacked but doesn’t tell him and he finds out and is upset but comforts her… 

Summary: You have a little bakery that is your pride and joy and a boyfriend on the police force who you're so proud of. He doesn't have a lot of dangerous cases until one day, three gunmen decide to take a bank hostage. A bank that is a couple of blocks from your bakery.

Square Filled: criminal au (2022) for @spnaubingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

You have to bake two dozen cupcakes, a two-tier cake, and a half dozen cookies before the end of the day and you’re working as hard as you can to get that done. You have flour on your apron and face, quiet music is playing from your speaker, and you have your hands elbow-deep in a bowl of batter.

The bell on the front door rings signalling someone walked into your bakery store, and you try to peek out of the room to see who it is.

“I’ll be right with you!” you call out. “Give me one minute!” The person doesn’t wait for you to come out to them so they walk into the kitchen. You’re about to yell at them when you see who it is. “Dean!”

“Hey, sweetheart,” he grins.

Dean is a respected cop that everyone knows. He has been on the force since eighteen, and he’s only gone up from there. He walks behind the counter and kisses you even though some of the flour gets on his face.

“What are you doing here?”

“What, I can’t stop by my girlfriend’s bakery?” You raise an eyebrow at him and he laughs. “No, I just wanted to say hi on my break.”

“Hi,” you smile. “Today has been hectic and I haven’t been open for nearly an hour. I just got this big order in for a birthday party this weekend. I’m trying to get as much as I can done so I don’t have to do it later.”

“Where’s Maria?”

“Coming in late. She has a sick kid at home, and her husband won’t be able to pick him up until after ten.”

“I was going to take you out for lunch but I can come here.”

“No, Maria can hold down the fort for an hour. I’d love to go out to lunch with you.”

“Okay.” He grabs one of the fresh muffins you made and takes out a ten dollar bill which he sets on the counter. “I’ll be back at twelve.”

“Hey, I don’t need your money.”

“It’s stealing. I’m a cop. I uphold the law,” he grins. He leans down and kisses you. “I love you.”

“I love you, too!”

Right before Maria shows up, your bakery filled with customers who are hungry for your sweets. With her at the register, you can focus on the big order which you’re almost done making the batter for. This whole bakery idea is all because of Dean. When you two were in high school, he encouraged you to continue bake. The school held a bunch of bake-offs which you participated in, and everyone fell in love with your food.

Starting junior year of high school, you started selling your baked goods for cheap until you got orders from practically everyone. His family owned a section of a building in the mall for their seasonal work, so they let you use it when they weren't. When Dean became a cop, you made cookies and cupcakes for all the officers in the office.

Being a cop is something you wished Dean didn’t pursue because it’s a very dangerous job, and you’re always worried that he’s not going to come home. He’s mostly a beat cop who does a lot of desk work and will occasionally do the big things like drug busts and hostage situations but those are far in between.

You don’t like it but you know he’s the best person for the job. He’s determined, he loves helping people who can’t help themselves, and he has a passion for the job. Just like you.

Noon comes faster than you think it does, and you start to clean your work space so that when  you return from lunch, you can start with a clean area. Dean walks in through the front door just as you’re finishing up.

“Y/N, Dean is here,” Maria calls from the front.

“Coming!” You put the dirty rags in the small hamper and take off your dirty apron. There is some flour on your clothes but not enough to cause you to not go out in public. That’s the reality of being a baker. You have flour on everything you wear. “Where are we going?”

“Razzio’s.”

“Italian food. Yum,” you giggle. “I’ll be back in an hour.”

“Have fun!” Maria smiles.

Razzio’s is located in the same block as your bakery so you two walk over there. The owner knows Dean from when he stopped a robbery fromt aking place, so now he gets free meals and discounts when he comes in. Dean still pays full price for the food even though Razzio doesn’t always take it.

“Dean! Welcome in!” Razzio greets.

“Hey, Raz. Got a table for me?”

“Of course. Window okay?”

“Perfect.”

Dean likes to try everything on the menu so he has Razzio cook him up something new every week without ordering, and every week, you end up loving what he brings to the table. It’s not unusual for Razzio not to lay menus down for you.

“So, I was thinking this weekend, we can take some time off,” Dean says.

“Like a getaway?”

“Yeah. My family has a cabin up north that I’d love to take you to.”

“It will be nice to relax instead of worrying about what orders I need to prepare for next week.”

“See? Win-win.”

“You’re a dork,” you giggle and kiss him.

Razzio is perfect like always, and you walked away with a free meal. What Razzio doesn’t take, Dean leaves as a tip for him. You walk back to your bakery hand-in-hand with a full stomach and a happy heart. You reach his police car when the radio he has strapped to his shoulder crackles to life.

“Unit 27, I got a 10-31 in progress. All three subjects appear to be armed. Please respond.”

10-31. You’ve been with Dean long enough to know that it’s a robbery. Subjects being armed means they have guns.

Dean grabs the small radio and presses the button to respond back.

“Unit 27 responding.” He turns to you. “I gotta go.”

“Please be careful.”

“Always,” he winks.

He kisses you goodbye and hops into his police cruiser. You watch him peel out of the parking lot before going back inside. It seems like not a lot of people have come in while you were gone so nothing bad happened. You resume your baking in the kitchen and slide in two batches of cupcakes into the oven when the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

Something isn’t right.

You walk carefully to the closed kitchen door and peer out of the small window to see three men with big guns inside the store. Maria and the other customers huddle together in fear. Are these the three subjects the same ones that the dispatcher was warning Dean about? How did they escape? Why did they come here? Are they looking to steal some food?

You take your phone out and dial Dean’s personal cell and place it to your ear. Pick up, Dean, pick up. Come on, pick up. You get his voicemail because he’s probably busy with the situation he got called away on.

“Dean, I need you here. There are three men with big guns in the bakery. Please hurry. They might be--”

“Hey!”

You look up and lock eyes with one of the suspects. You quickly hang up and duck down but he has already seen you. The man storms into the kitchen and grabs your arm tightly. You’re thrown off balance that your phone is dropped when he drags you out where everyone else is. You don’t struggle to get away in fear of being shot and let them tie you up.

“Are you the owner?” the leader asks. You nod because you have tape over your mouth. “Where’s the money?” You shake your head and he cocks his weapon. “Where’s the fucking money?!”

You mumble something underneath the tape, and one of the them rips it off you.

“Fuck,” you hiss at the pain. “I don’t have a lot of money. You’re wasting your time here.”

“No, you see, I know you have money. I see you leave this store every day with a bag full of it. Where is it?”

“Not here.”

Like hell you’re going to tell them there is a big safe hidden behind a picture frame in the abc with a bunch of cash stored there. You have most of the cash in the bank but you keep a chunk of it here for emergencies only. You’re not going to give them your hard earned money.

“Okay.” The leader points his gun at you and Maria cries where she sits. “You have until the count of three to tell me where the money is or I blow your fucking head off. Deal?”

The fear has sunk in and you start crying not only for you but for everyone else here. MAria is such a good mother and wife, she doesn’t deserve to be killed. Every customer in here has a life, someone they go home to. You cna’t do that to them. You have no idea if Dean got your message so you can’t rely on him to be here and save you.

“One.”

You look up to answer when you spot someone moving behind him. You look and see Dean’s beautiful green eyes looking into yours. He has four other cops with him that snuck in through the back.

“Two.”

He puts a finger to his mouth to tell you to keep quiet, and you look back at the man who is threatening you with a gun.

“Thr--”

“Wait! I’ll tell you!” you gasp.

“I’m waiting.”

“Okay. If I tell you, you let them go. They have nothing to do with this,” you gesture to the other hostages.

“We’ll see. Where’s the fucking money?”

You look behind the three gunmen and notice Dean and the other cops come out quietly with their guns out.

“Right behind you.”

The leader turns right into the barrel of Dean’s gun. He goes to raise his own to fight but notices the other four cops with guns on them. They are outnumbered and they don’t want to die.

“Man, you three were hard to catch. Why’d you come here?” Dean chuckles. “Lower your weapons. All of you. Turn around with hands behind your backs.”

The three men do as they’re told, and three officers put them in handcuffs. Another ones goes over to the hostages and starts to get the out of their ties while Dean rushes over to you.

“Oh, my God, Dean,” you cry.

“I’m right here, baby. You’re okay. You’re safe now.” Once free, you get up and run into his arms. You break down crying and he smoothes down your hair in comfort. “I’m right here. You’re okay now.”

One of the cops calls for backup so that the gunmen are taken away in three separate cars. Paramedics come to check everyone out, and the money that the gunmen took is being processed to return back to its owners.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Dean asks.

“Yeah. They didn’t hurt us. Well, one of them grabbed my arm hard but I don’t think it’s enough to form a bruise. I didn’t think you got my message. I didn’t think you were coming.”

“I will always come. I will always be here to protect you,” he promises.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[gg-pedro]

can you hear the music (ch. 3) - joel miller x reader

masterlist

summary: everyone in jackson is trying to distract themselves from something. you teach ellie piano and find yourself trying to help more than one miller settle into their new world.

chapter 3: today, it would be sarah's 34th birthday. but today, tomorrow, and every other day, joel needs you.

warnings: post outbreak!joel, jackson!era, joel x reader, AFAB!reader, platonic!ellie x reader, implied age gap, smoochin', gropin', mentions of death, joel grieves, joel sings, arguing/fighting (kinda), mental health discussions, lewdness, angst, heavy feelings (and there's more where that come from!)

words: 3.4k

a/n: man. can u tell I rewatched episode 1? i’m proud of this one. also, I hope this reaches my fleetwood mac lovers.

-

Joel, while in the middle of hauling a bag of horse feed over his good shoulder (and ‘good’ was being generous), realized he was getting old. This was the tenth revelation of the day, give or take. From when he forced himself out of bed onto aching joints, to when he hadn’t heard Ellie come up behind him in the kitchen, and most notably, to when he realized Sarah’s 34th birthday would’ve been today. 

It didn’t sting anymore. Not after this long, not after 20 years. It didn’t even hurt. 

It just ached. 

He sloughed the feed into the trough, stepping back to catch his breath. He glided his hand over the pretty little mare that he usually took out. She seemed too small to not be a pony, but hey, equine standards had flown out the window 20 years ago along with everything else. 

Tommy knew, too. He never forgot. Maybe that's why he patted Joel on the back at breakfast that morning and told him to go ‘take a ride’. Clear his head. They still had work to do today. The Earth never stopped spinning. Joel thought that by now, it should’ve.

To be fair, the date could’ve been a little off, but the air was that same lukewarm cold and the sun shone blinding in a clear blue sky the same way it did on the day Sarah was born. Winter was melting into a tepid spring in Wyoming, and Joel was still here to fucking see it.

For a second he wondered if his vision was going, too, having to do a double-take when he noticed you leaning against the wooden beam of the stall entrance.

“Jesus,” he mumbled. “Y’ever heard of knocking?”

You rolled your eyes. “Must’ve missed the door.”

“How’d you find me?” He asked, finally turning to really look at you. Irritatingly beautiful.

“Ellie,” you answered. “Said you were going for a joy ride.”

He sighed, coming over to wrap his arms just below the dip of your spine. “Kid couldn’t keep a secret if her fuckin’ life depended on it,” he grumbled, pausing afterwards to give you a slow kiss.

“I like the honesty. She’s got nothing to hide, especially if it has anything to do with you.” You grinned and fell right into his little ploy. 

“Mmh. Lucky me.”

He had you backed against the wooden railing in an instant, his hand creeping up below your shirt and onto the soft skin of your waist. The touch raised goosebumps all over your body. You placed two hands on either side of his neck, gently, enjoying the way he was feeling you up with his lips glued to yours.

“Now? Right here?” You asked once you had the chance to break away from his mouth. “A little risky, Miller. Don’t forget, I’m still your worst kept secret,” you chided.

“No, not right here. And fuck you.” He pulled away until all but one hand was still stroking your side through your shirt.

“Likewise.”

And Joel loved you. Maybe not in the same way he loved Tommy or Ellie or Sarah, but still, he did. He loved your smart mouth, the way you blazed like a fire in bed with him, your natural talent, the way you made it all ache less. 

And you did– make it ache less. That was reason enough. 

He gestured to the horse that was a few feet away, still eating its breakfast. “You wanna join?”

“Can’t say no,” you said. “What’s the occasion? I thought they were strict about leaving for non-essential reasons.”

Joel was looking at you until he wasn’t, his gaze going right through you. He could tell you. He knew he could. You knew about his daughter and you still never brought it up. You’d lost people too, he knew that. He could tell you and you would bring him into your arms and say something like, I’m so sorry, Joel. I’m here. I’m here if you need me. 

He would tell you. But not today.

He shrugged and pressed a kiss into your hairline. “Just another day. I want you to come.”

“Alright, then.” You nodded towards the guitar sitting in the corner of the stall. Dark stained wood around the edges fading into a lighter mahogany. It was beautiful. “Bringing that, too?”

“Yeah, why not. Here, let me help.” He grabbed it and lifted it over your head, situating it so that the body of the guitar was resting against your back. “You ever played?”

You shook your head. “No. Good thing you do.”

He brought the horse out into the open, making sure he still had everything important– a gun in his pocket and a broken watch on his wrist. He helped you up onto the saddle, sitting behind him and flush with his back. 

Outside the walls, It was a beautiful day. The sun had melted away the heavy snow on the peaks of the rolling hills, the first kiss of spring. New life, grass that had started to green. You had your arms wrapped tightly around Joel’s middle, face pressed against the back of his shoulder. The fields seemed boundless. You hadn’t realized just how infinitesimally small your world had grown since being in Jackson. 

“Are there usually infected around here?” You asked. 

“Not really. The valley helps. We’ll stay out in the open, don’t worry, baby.”

You didn’t even have to ask. The little tour he was giving you around the east end of the fields was mostly an effort to case the surrounding area, his senses on high alert for anything dangerous. The truth was, this place was secure. Still, Joel would move mountains to keep you safe. Would do anything. He’d made mistakes in the past that he wouldn’t let happen again. Couldn’t.

After a loop around the outer wall, riding with a mixture of the horse's friendly canter and Joel intentionally speeding her up to scare the shit out of you and make you hold on tighter to him, he settled on a plateau at the top of a hill, a few steps away from the thick evergreen forest.

After helping you off the mare and spreading out the woven blanket he had rolled up on the back of the saddle, Joel sat down with a heavy sigh. You tied the lead to a low tree branch where the horse seemed content to roam. After, you pulled the guitar over your head and handed it to him.

It was still early in the day, and the sun was barely cresting over the hilltops from this view. 10:42 AM. That’s when his daughter was born. He looked down at the broken face of his watch out of habit, even though the thing had been broken for years at this point. 

You dropped down next to him and your head immediately connected with his shoulder. Looking over at him, his eyes were far away and glassy. “What’re you thinking about?”

Joel shook his head and pressed a slow kiss into your forehead. “Nothin’. Just wondering what I should play.” He brought the guitar into his lap and strummed it a little, pausing to tune the top string down half a step. “Feel like I gotta impress you.”

You huffed a laugh and shook your head. “You don’t have to. Who’d you used to listen to?”

“Oh, Jesus…” he had sort of let go of the fond memories he had of old music. With you, though, he was starting to miss it. “Some Zeppelin, some Billy Joel, Pearl Jam… Nirvana was just gettin’ good, too. Lots of Chet Atkins when I was younger.”

You just smiled, moving your hand to stroke his knee. “None of that surprises me.”

“You like Fleetwood Mac?” he asked after a while. “Stevie Nicks, always one of my favorites. My daughter’s, too.”

Your heart hurt a little at that. Joel had never brought up the daughter he’d lost with you. You kissed his shoulder as he started picking the strings to the tune of Landslide, that gentle back and forth that you hadn’t heard in more than 20 years. 

“That's a good one, baby.”

You still remembered the lyrics. He did, too. 

I took my love, I took it down

I climbed a mountain and I turned around

And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills,

‘Til the landslide brought me down

Joel’s playing wasn’t perfect. He’d picked the guitar up again a few times in the last couple weeks, but before that, it had been a lifetime ago. On that radio station in Austin, The Best Of The ‘70’s, this one would come on all the time. Sarah would grin and sing her best rendition, as loudly as possible, always egging Joel on to join in too. Sometimes he would, but not always. He regretted that. 

He thought your voice was beautiful. Clear and bright. His voice was probably an octave below yours, gravelly and out of practice. The two of you mixed together like honey into whiskey. 

Oh, mirror in the sky,

What is love?

Can the child in my heart rise above?

Can I sail through the changin’ ocean tides?

Can I handle the seasons of my life?

He would’ve liked to scoff at that. There's nothing to do but handle it. Push forward and deal. He didn’t die on September 26th, 2003, despite his best efforts and no matter how much he wanted to. He was here with you. Singing with you, laughing through the verses, watching the sun light up your eyes. And for that? A part of him had to consider himself a lucky son of a bitch.

He couldn’t stop himself from wanting to make a life with you. The extent to which he could see that to fruition, he wasn’t sure. Everything was uncertain. He didn’t even deserve it. Nothing he had done over the past 20 years was worthy of you. But fuck, he could be good. If he tried, maybe, he could be good for you. And trying? It’d be worth it. 

Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’

‘Cause I’ve built my life around you

But time makes you bolder

Even children get older

And I’m getting older, too

Joel had to stop singing. Tears were swelling in his dark brown eyes and one wrong move would break the entire dam of emotions. He kept playing, though, into the second chorus, happy to listen to you.

Well, I’ve been afraid of–

“Joel?”

You turned away from the landscape to look at his face. Tears were streaking his cheeks, his eyes staring straight ahead of him. You didn’t say anything– you took the guitar out of his arms and brought him into yours instead. You rubbed slow circles into his flannel-clad back, holding him tight as his shoulders sagged and shuddered with every shaky inhalation. 

“I’m sorry, baby, I’m sorry," he managed to say.

“It’s okay, Joel. You’re okay. It’s just me, you know I don’t mind. I got you, come on, just get it out.”

You had your own guesses as to what was getting to him so bad. You told yourself a long time ago that you wouldn’t pry. He wouldn’t tell you like that, anyway. He had to do it himself. 

After a few pregnant moments passed with the two of you like that, his breathing finally evened out enough for him to speak clearly. He pulled away from you, taking your face into his hands so you couldn’t look away. His eyes were reddened and puffy, his cheeks wet.

“I ain’t gonna let nothin’ happen to you. D’you understand that? Nothin’. I’m gonna take care of you. Keep you safe. Keep you happy.” He tucked your hair behind your ears before gliding his thumbs over the skin just below your eye. “I will. You just gotta let me.”

You gently pried his hands away from your face, taking them into your own and pressing a kiss into his knuckles. “Okay, baby. I’ll let you. I’ll let you,” you repeated. “I’m safe with you, I know.”

He pulled you in suddenly, practically squeezing all of the air out of your lungs with the grip he had on you. “I promise you. I promise.”

He promised you, and you believed him. 

And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills,

Well, the landslide bring it down

Oh, the landslide bring it down

-

At your lesson with Ellie, she seemed more motivated than you did. Sooner or later, she was going to exhaust the entire Star Wars: A Beginner’s Score sheet music book that you had found a few years back. 

After successfully sight reading the first few bars of The Imperial March and promptly declaring that she had had enough ‘piano-ing’ for the day, Ellie gave you a look.

You furrowed your brows. “What?”

“Nothin’,” she said flippantly, looking away from you. “Just– are you and Joel, like, together?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Ellie turned, looking exasperated. “Pft. You know exactly what I mean.”

You rolled your eyes and jokingly shoved her away from you by the forehead. “We’re getting married next week, actually,” you said, laughing. “Mhm, we’re running away with each other. Gonna buy a big white house with a big picket fence down south– you know, to keep you out.”

“Oh, fuck you, dude.” She giggled too, punching your shoulder in return hard enough to push you down the piano bench. “I have a right to know! And besides, I don’t have anyone to tell. I can keep a secret.”

“I disagree, but– if you memorize your F# minor scale by Tuesday, I’ll tell you all about it. Has to be perfect, though,” you qualified.

“Fine,” she said with stubborn resolve. “And… there's one more thing.” Her eyes cast downwards and her shoulders drooped a little as she gave a long exhale.

“What is it?”

She looked back up at you through her dark lashes. “Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda?”

“The– the who?”

With a completely straight face, she said, “Yeah. He’s lucky it was a soft drink.”

Ellie’s laughter could barely be heard over your exaggerated groaning. You had your head dropped into your hands and Ellie in tears when Joel walked in through the front door.

Ellie, sighing and wiping her eyes, said: “I told her the ol’ soda-can-to-the-head one. Pretty good, right?”

“Jesus…” you heard Joel mutter.

Shiny-eyed and smiling, you pointed to the door. “Out of my house. Both of you. And don’t bother coming back.”

Ellie grabbed her coat and was out the door before Joel could even open his mouth. “See you Tuesday!”

“Don’t let the door hit you on the way out!”

-

Later that day, in the hot and unusually busy Tipsy Bison, Joel was too drunk.

It was the perfect conclusion to the most bittersweet day he’d had in a while. Had the morning with you, finished up a roofing project just after dinner, and against his better judgment, asked if you wanted drinks. You arrived as a pair, undoubtedly eliciting new whisperings from your fellow Jackson residents, but Joel was starting not to care.

You’d mentioned going out together in passing to him after he had told you about the bar scene when he was younger, commenting on how you wished you’d gotten to experience that. And yeah, maybe this felt more like playing pretend to him than anything, but he wanted to give you good days. Good memories. A real life, where you could experience things with him and not have to worry about how long the happiness would last.

Tonight, it backfired. A year ago today, he would’ve been mixing whiskey and oxycodone to forget it was Sarah’s birthday. But now, he was too drunk with Tommy, and you were watching all of it, and he wished he still had a handful of pills to knock him out. 

“She your girlfriend now, brother?” Tommy slurred, clapping him on the shoulder. 

Joel grabbed you roughly by the waist from his seat at the bar, tucking you in close to him. “Yeah, she’s my girl,” he cooed. “Ain’t that right, pretty baby?”

Tommy chuckled, slamming his glass down onto the counter. “Same way Tessa was your girl? Or different this time?”

Joel wanted to be sick. “The fuck’s wrong with you, asshole?”

You, a little tipsy yourself by this point, smoothed a hand over Joel’s curls in an effort to de-escalate this conversation. “Joel, hey. He’s your brother. Don’t start a fight.”

Tommy shook his head and patted you on the arm. “It’s okay, baby, let him speak.”

Drunkenly, Joel stood up, pointing an accusatory finger at his brother. “If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be saddled with all this shit,” he started. “Always chasin’ your sorry ass. Halfway across the fuckin’ country this time. If it weren’t for you, Tess’d be here.”

This was an old argument, but they were drunk, and it seemed like the perfect time to rehash it. 

Tommy stood up to meet his eyes. “Oh yeah? Really? If it weren’t for me, Joel, you’da had a bullet in your head by now. Oh, y’haven't told her? Your girl? Go on, tell her. Tell her all about Sarah. Happy fuckin’ birthday to her.”

“Keep her name out your motherfuckin’ mouth, you– bastard–”

You had your arm interlinked with Joel’s, but he flung you off of him in an instant. He swung at Tommy, but his aim was a little diluted from the gin and Tommy ducked anyway. He only got one attempt in before five different people were pulling them away from each other to opposite ends of the bar.

You followed Joel, thanking the two men who were restraining him as he shouted strings of profanities and nobody, assuring them that you could take it from here. 

“Joel, you gotta calm down. Hey. Hey, Miller, I’m fucking talking to you.” You grabbed his face in your hands and forced him to look at you. “Take a breath. Just take a breath.”

He did as he was told, but his eyes were still darting rapidly around the room. “Tommy…” he breathed out. “Fuck. I didn’t mean to, I swear. Did I hurt him? I hurt him, didn’t I?”

“No, baby. You– uh, you missed.”

“Ah,  fuck.”

Maybe narcotics wouldn’t have fixed this, either.

Joel let you drag him back to your place without putting up much of a fight. Sarah. She would’ve been ashamed of him. There was a mounting list of things that Sarah would’ve hated him for, and this was just the icing on the cake.

Back on your couch, lying on his back, he wanted today to be over. 

“I was s’pposed to be doin’ good for you,” he said quietly. “Bein’ better for you.”

“What are you talking about?” You asked, your voice straining with the force it took to tug off his left boot.

“I’m no good for you.”

“Joel–”

“I ain’t, babydoll. I ain’t. Not for you, not for Ellie, not for Tommy, not for Tessa, and not for Sarah,” he mumbled. “It’s her birthday.”

“I know.”

“I miss her,” he swallowed. “Real bad.”

“I know, Joel.”

There was a lump in his throat and a tightness in his chest. Landslide was still stuck in his head.

… saw my reflection… snow covered hills …

He shut his eyes. “Is Ellie alright?”

“Mhm. She’s asleep down the street,” you said, tracing lazy shapes into his stomach.

“She’s a good kid,” he mumbled. “Tough kid.”

“She is,” you agreed. “She relies on you– cares about you. Lots of people care about you.”

… time makes y’bolder, children get… older …

Joel hummed in response. “I still need you.”

… I’m gettin’ older, too … 

You bit your lip. You should really get back up, make sure Joel had a glass of water and painkillers near him for when he woke up. Maybe even a bowl from the kitchen. But your body felt like it was being weighed down by lead, and the infrequency at which you actually drank alcohol was making you unfathomably tired.

You laid down on top of him, head pressed against his chest. His breathing was slow and even and his heart rate was calm. 

“I need you, too.”

-

[cherryredcheol]

me!

tldr: i promise that you'll never find another like me a/n: i unironically love this song. and lover is in my top 3 taylor albums. don't fight with me about it. tw: mentions of drinking/drunkenness (not shown)

i know you never get just what you see but i will never bore you, baby

laying in bed, seungkwan thought it was almost eerie how quiet the apartment was, but he was grateful for it. last night it was packed to the brim, bursting at the seams with friends there to celebrate your birthday. songs were sung, music was blasted, and the laughs were abundant. now all seungkwan could hear was the steady sound of your breathing next to him, the distant hum of traffic outside, and the pounding in his head. the sun was bleeding through the curtains, too bright and too warm. his skin felt sticky and sweaty. which was probably due to the hangover he would be nursing for the rest of the day. 

seungkwan had no idea what time it was. the two of you could’ve been asleep in that bed for a few hours or a few days. he was sure you’d feel even worse than him when you finally woke up. you had gone hard last night and would be reaping what you had sown today as a consequence. he had a fleeting thought about climbing out of bed to get some medicine from the cabinet in the en suite but just as he was about to actually do it, you shifted on the mattress curling closer to him, as if seeking his comfort. he couldn’t leave you in that state, could he? he didn’t think so. 

you had surprised him last night. not usually a heavy drinker, you hadn’t been that drunk in a long time. he couldn’t even remember the last time he’d seen you like that, if at all. he probably should’ve kept a closer eye on you and helped you pace yourself. but when you turned to him, already slightly tipsy after two shots thrown back in quick succession, lips wet with liquor, and eyes sparkling with unadulterated birthday joy, he couldn’t tell you no when you asked him to do the third one together. but three shots suddenly turned into two bottles of soju each and by then all bets were off. seungkwan has always had a hard time telling you no, and apparently, that still stands even when you’re both wasted. 

“i can feel you staring at me.” seungkwan was startled from his thoughts by the sound of your raspy morning voice, made worse by the lingering sting of alcohol.

he laughed and pressed a soft kiss to your temple, hoping to ease some of the pain he’s sure you’re feeling, “i’m trying to decide if i should risk crawling out of bed for water and medicine or if our love for one another is enough to cure this.” 

this time you laughed, wincing slightly from the jostling of your head you pointed out, “our love is strong but it’s not magic.” 

“i don’t know, feels pretty magical to me.” eyes on you, he watched a blush creep across your cheek that wasn’t squished into the pillow, the exact reaction he hoped his cheesy comment would have. 

eyes still trained on your closed ones, he wasn’t surprised when your soft voice reached his ears after a few moments of stillness, asking the question he was already expecting, “can we just lay in bed today? i know it’ll be boring but-”

seungkwan cut you off, “i’m never bored with you, cutie.”

you ran after me and called my name i never wanna see you walk away

soonyoung probably didn’t mean anything by the offhanded comment about seungkwan’s repeated choreography mistake but he took it personally. today had been so long already and it wasn’t over yet. he was desperate to leave the practice room. craving fresh air and some quality time with you. sweet you, who was sitting on the floor, back pressed to the wall, head tilted down, enthralled by whatever was on the screen cradled in your hands. well, you were captivated until voices started getting loud.  

you look up from your phone to see the flurry of seungkwan’s hands moving animatedly, decibel climbing with every word. just at the peak of the crescendo he heaves a sigh, turns on his heel, and promptly exits. 

the tension left behind is thick and uncomfortable but you’re on your feet following him out the door before it could even slam in its frame. 

you could see him down the hallway, the distance between you two growing with each of his purposeful steps. “seungkwan-”  you called out to him gently, not trying to make anything worse, but wanting him to know you were behind him. 

he turned at the sound of your voice, the frustration on his features softening into fondness as he watched you catch up to him. 

as soon as you’re close enough he reaches out to you, fingers intertwining, and suddenly he felt exhausted from all the effort he had put forth today. here in the hallway with you was the first moment since he left you in bed this morning where he felt like he could relax. 

looking at him and seeing no signs of the earlier outburst you decide to test the waters, “are you alright? need to talk?” 

seungkwan closes his eyes, squeezes your hand, and releases a slow breath. with a small nod of his head, he reopens his eyes, meeting your own,  “i had you meet me here so we could go out to dinner tonight and it would’ve all been great because we were supposed to get done with practice an hour ago except i keep messing up and it’s keeping everyone here late and you’ve been sitting on the floor and i just-” he closes his eyes again, tilting his head back and releasing a hard breath through his nose. 

you barely hear him when he says, “i’m so tired.”

this time you squeeze his hand briefly before releasing it. choosing instead to wrap your arms around his middle, offering wordless support as he wraps his own arms around you and pulls you closer. you two stay like that for a moment and when seungkwan has finally collected himself he whispers again, “do i have to go in there and apologize or can we just leave and pretend this never happened?”

sensing his teasing tone, you giggle, “oh kwan, you definitely owe them an apology. storming out of the room is pretty childish, not cute.”

he pulled back, looking incredulous, “what do you mean ‘not cute’? it was cute enough to work on you! you came running right after me!”

you laughed again, “yeah that’s because i never want to see you walk away.”

i promise that nobody’s gonna love you like me

seungkwan eased the car to a stop at the red light, looking over at you in the passenger seat. your head was turned, looking out the window admiring the bright colors of early summer that have bloomed across seoul. 

glancing at the light to make sure it was still red, he broke the comfortable silence, “any idea where i’m taking you?”

you turned, meeting his teasing gaze with your own, “obviously not. that’s the whole point of a surprise, isn’t it?”

he held your eyes for a minute, the moment only broken by the sound of a polite beep! alerting him to the change in signal. he focused his attention back on the task of driving, a feat in and of itself that was near herculean when he could feel your eyes lingering on his profile. 

another few moments of quiet passed when he spoke again, “would you like to know where i’m taking you?” 

you couldn’t help but continue to tease him, “it kind of seems like you want to tell me. not the other way around.” 

he scoffed, “i do want to tell you! i planned this whole thing for you. i know you’re going to love it.” 

you smiled, “you better tell me then. i’m dying to know.” 

throughout this whole exchange, you had been too busy watching seungkwan’s expressive face and didn’t even notice the car had stopped. only when you felt seungkwan shift the gear into park did you look around. 

“you brought me to a…parking lot in a random seoul neighborhood. cool.” 

seungkwan shifted in his seat to turn and look at you, “this is not just any parking lot in a random seoul neighborhood, cutie. this is the parking lot for museum kimchikan!”

your eyes widened in disbelief and a smile stretched across your face, “you brought me to the kimchi museum? holy shit, i love you!”

you were giggling and unbuckling your seatbelt in a flash, hurrying to get out of the car and into the museum you had seen on instagram a few weeks ago. it had come up on your feed as something unique to do and you had promptly sent the post to seungkwan, telling him how cool it would be to go and learn the history of such a staple food. he hadn’t seemed that interested and you’d kind of forgot about it so when he planned this surprise date for you two, you had not been expecting this at all. 

crossing the parking lot, fingers clasped together, you pulled seungkwan to a stop, “thanks for planning this for me. it means a lot that you remembered.”

he blushed, giving away how touched he was by your words despite his simple answer, “of course i remembered, i love you.”

[therealdogsinmymind]

✩ Turnabout ✩

18+ MDNI

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

AO3 Link | Word Count: 5,206 | Chapters 1/1

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Synopsis: Jinwoo comes home injured and you’re brimming with excitement at the idea of being able to tend to his wounds like the good old days, however things get a bit carried away…

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Pairing: Sung Jinwoo/Male Reader, Sung Jinwoo/You

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Tags: Reader POV, Male Reader, S-Rank Jin-Woo, Minor Injuries, Domestic Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Communication, Established Relationship, Cock Tease, Face-Fucking, Hand Jobs, Premature Ejaculation, Dacryphilia,

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Picture from @oo0mika0oo ‘s icon edits

It’s not often that S-Rank hunter Sung Jinwoo suffers defeat these days. Frankly it just doesn’t seem to happen anymore, and you’d never admit it to anyone but you wish just a smidgen that sometimes he would come home bloodied and bruised like he used to when he was an E-rank hunter. You miss taking care of him; kissing his wounds better and knowing that you serve a purpose in his life. You’re not really sure what your purpose is these days; you mostly cook for Jinah and wait for Jinwoo to come home from fighting whatever big bad he’s facing. Not that he does most days.

You’re not expecting today to be the day he comes home, uncharacteristically beaten down. You find yourself brimming with delight when he appears from nothingness behind you, smelling of dirt and blood. It’s fucking gross, but the point is that he’s disheveled and that’s a rare sight. You don’t turn around, you can’t, he’s taken to slumping over your back; however you can see him in the reflection of the window, his face is busted up.

”Tough fight?” you hum the question, internally vibrating with joy that he’s come home to you seeking comfort.

”No. Just unnecessarily long,” he sighs into your hair. You want so badly to turn around and look at the full damage but he has you trapped under his weight. You’re sure he wants to wallow in his displeasure at having been injured so you’ll have to make do. You reach back and card your fingers through his hair, it’s lightly coated in dirt but not too bad. He sighs softly at your touch, leaning into it. You wonder what he got up to while he was gone. You missed him so much it almost doesn’t feel like he’s really here but the warmth seeping into your back is solid proof.

“You’ve been gone for a week, y’know?” There’s a slight melancholy air to your tone that you can’t disguise. He tenses up and you can’t help but feel bad for kicking him when he’s down like this. “It’s fine, I know you’re busy. I just wish you’d call.” Jinwoo tightens his hold on you as if you’ll wither away at any moment.

”I was inside a system gate, I’m sorry my love, I didn’t intend to be away for so long.” The stupid fucking system, sometimes you hate it, you know it saved Jinwoo’s life but sometimes it feels like it’s also trying to take everything he has. It’s taken large chunks of his emotions, he’s had to fight to regain some sense of some of them. It’s taken his time away from his family, his normal life, and one day you fear it’ll take him away from you entirely. It’s just some kind of game after all.

You pull yourself away from that line of thought. ”Like I said s’fine. I used your black card, so we’re even… sorta.” You pause for a moment, before explaining further, “It’s a gift from both of us to my mother, her birthday is next week.”

He sighs into your hair before kissing your head, “My love, you can use that for whatever you want. I don't care. I would actually prefer you do.”

”Yeah well…” The thing is, you still flinch when pulling it out, the concept of spending money scares you. After spending so many years where you and Jinwoo’s family barely scraped by, it's a hard feeling to shake. “Anyway that’s not important, you seem tired. Why don’t we sit, hm?” He doesn’t fight you, seemingly content to let you guide him to the couch. Once in a while he doesn’t argue when you try to get him to sit down for two seconds and it’s a fucking blessing but you don’t suspect it’ll last long. 

Sitting him down on the couch you take a step back to assess the damage while he leans his head back and closes his eyes. His legs are spread wide and his arms are sprawled across the back of the couch, he seems exhausted. He’s notably tired and visibly frustrated, you assume he’s annoyed with having been injured. There seems to be blood on his shirt, you wonder if it’s his, but hope not. Most glaringly his face is busted to shit. His nose seems to have some dried blood under it, he clearly scraped his cheek and it looks like he has a black eye forming. Not to mention he’s absolutely filthy, but otherwise okay. Smiling crookedly you step between his open knees, placing one hand on the back of the couch for balance as you lean over him and place a whisper of a kiss on the corner of his mouth. You miss intentionally to get his attention then start to pull away in tease.

“Mm, do it right.” He snakes a hand behind your head and brings you back in. Pulling you into a soft kiss that clearly resonates ‘I’m home, sorry I was gone, I’m here now.’ It’s an I love you in its own right. 

You kiss him softly for a few moments before pulling away just enough to whisper, “Let's take a shower.”

He huffs a laugh against your lips, “That bad?” 

“Well you’re covered in blood for one... But I’ll wash your back so don’t worry about it m’kay?”

”You don’t have to do that,” Jinwoo says, gently tucking a stray piece of your hair behind your ear. 

“Yeah but I want to… Are you saying you don’t want to see me naked?” You reach up and your hand captures his mid-air. You press it to your cheek and he strokes your skin with his thumb.

Jinwoo shakes his head in defeat, ”Hard bargain.”

”I’m known for those,” you grin.

He pulls you in for another kiss, this one heavier than the last but still airing on the soft side. It’s wet and hot but slow, no real sense of urgency behind it. When you part he bumps his nose against yours, “You’ll let me cook after?”

”You’re injured so that’s gonna be a no, but you can cook tomorrow. Make me breakfast in bed or something.”

”I can do that,” he says with absolute seriousness. 

”That was a joke.”

”No, you’ve put the idea in my head now, I’ll think of it as a quest.”

”Oh shut up.” You’re laughing regardless, maybe the system is good for something once in a while. You offer him a hand and you swear to yourself that you’re fully prepared to pull him off the couch but you know you aren’t that strong, he’s deceptively heavy. Your hand stays offered anyway and he takes it mostly just for the sake of touching you, getting up entirely of his own right. He holds it for a few seconds, squeezing it gently once, and then lets go before striding towards the bathroom. You note that he walks away with far too much grace and ease for an injured man. For fuck’s sake the guy could at least pretend to be phased. It seems like he took his two seconds on the couch and now he’s good. Shaking your head you follow him, pulling your sweater and shirt off in one movement behind his back; maybe you can at least surprise him a little. You slip your shorts and underwear off much the same way, struggling a little to not make noise or stumble in your walking as you do so. All that’s left is your stupid little over the knee socks because your legs get unbearably cold but pants were the devil's invention. You have no way to take those off easily but that's okay, you suspect he won’t mind. 

You say nothing, letting him flick the light on to the dressing room and turn back to you on his own. Jinwoo’s about to say something but as he sees you he pauses hard, completely short circuiting for a moment. You have to hold it together at the slack-jawed look on his face. 

“Hi,” he says stupidly, fully acting as if he’s never seen you naked before. You lose your battle, as his response makes you bust out in a fit of giggles. 

“Hi, baby- You good?” 

“Yeah…” Jinwoo says, dazed, “I just forget how lucky I am.”

”Alright smooth talker…” you roll your eyes, you really don’t think you’re all that special; especially not when he has celebrities and S-rank hunters with their eyes on him. He seems to know what you’re thinking so he grabs your hand, dragging you further into the dressing room. You toss your clothes near the washing machine and let him pull you along. He pushes you against the sink and boxes you in. You don’t even have to meet his eyes to know he’s looking at you with that intensity that you fell in love with. 

He seems to struggle with his words for a moment, you know he’s not always the best at fully expressing himself these days, it’s okay you can wait. Eventually Jinwoo lets out a soft breath and says, “I love you.”

You blink at him, wide eyed. He doesn’t say that much, he shows it in other ways, but he rarely says it. You smile softly, reaching up to caress his cheek for a moment, “I love you too.” 

He captures your lips as soon as the words are out of your mouth; this kiss is different from your last. It’s wetter, harder, Jinwoo slips his tongue into your mouth quickly. He slides an arm behind your back and pulls your hips flush, your bare cock rubbing against his pants, it forces a moan out of you. The sound seems to get lost in between your lips but the way his grip tightens means he heard it just fine. His other hand grabs your thigh and hikes it up so you’re left resting in his hands lest you want to balance one leg alone. You know he’s insanely strong but it always makes your cock throb when he lifts your full weight like it’s nothing. Then as if hearing your thoughts he uses his grip on your back and thigh to lift you onto your toes so you truly have to rely on his strength alone, unable to support yourself in any meaningful way. His injuries are momentarily forgotten by you as you’re too busy whining into his mouth and gripping tightly at his shirt. 

Thankfully things shift and it’s his turn to moan when his hand adjusts itself on your thigh and comes in contact with your stocking. You can’t help the small bit of laughter that bubbles from your lips, forcing you to pull away from the kiss.

Surprisingly, Jinwoo speaks before you can, “Remind me to get you more of these…” He plays with the hem of your stockings, they begin to slip down past your knee a bit and his breath catches ever-so-slightly. “They’re good.”

”You’re so ridiculous.”

”I’m a simple man.” 

“Yeah baby, I’ve noticed.”

Jinwoo doesn’t bother with a retort, opting to kiss you instead. You let him kiss you breathless for a few minutes until you pull away and mumble against his lips, “You’re wearing far too many clothes.”

”I can fix that,” he mumbles back. He seems loath to pull away from your lips, kissing you again and grinding his hips against your bare cock, almost certainly just to hear you moan.

He pulls away, setting your leg down gently and gives you a second to find your balance before he steps away, pulling his shirt over his head as he moves. You usually try not to boost his ego too much but you find your eyes raking down his chest regardless. He smirks and you roll your eyes, caught red handed you guess. He does seem to have a blossoming bruise on his ribs but no blood so that’s good at least; it must not have been his. Jinwoo shucks off the rest of his clothes and you pointedly don’t watch just to avoid giving him the satisfaction.

When he’s done he moves back into your space and you hum, thinking about what you want to do; this is supposed to be about him after all. If you give this man an inch he’ll take a mile. You can’t let him take control, he'll aggravate his injuries for certain. Instead of letting him pin you to the counter again you take his hips gently and spin the two of you around. When you push him against the counter he raises his eyebrow, curious enough to let you do as you will. 

It’s then that you sink to your knees, glad for your socks, you’re sure your legs would be freezing otherwise. You hear Jinwoo suck in a sharp breath and you hold back a smile. Instead you lick your hand, letting a dollop of spit fall out of your mouth into your palm before you take a hold of Jinwoo’s cock. He hisses as you begin to stroke him slowly, twisting your wrist every so often, bringing him to full hardness. Occasionally you swipe your thumb over the head but largely you stay away from any movement that could really bring him to the edge. Instead you choose to pepper his hips and thighs with kisses. 

He whines a little, “You- hah- you're being mean…”

“Oh?” you hum, your tone lifting in a way that makes Jinwoo stiffen.

“No- You're not mean. You're not mean I didn't-”

“Baby if you want me to be mean-” your hand lightly squeezes the base of his cock right before you lean forward and give the head a small kiss. His hips jerk a little but it's a miniscule reaction in comparison to the moan that's torn from his chest moments later when you properly wrap your lips around his cock. 

“Please, please-”

You pay him no mind, instead taking care to suck slowly and softly at the head of his cock. Sounds of distressed pleasure spill from Jinwoo’s lips as he contorts over you. You pull off of him with a pop and sigh in mock disappointment.

”Baby you’re going to hurt yourself. You’re injured!”

“I can fix that! Will you stop fucking with me please and thank you-“

You bite him unkindly high up on his inner thigh to which he jerks again. “You want me to take care of you! You came slumping back to me after you got your ass beat so sit there and be good! Stop bitching and maybe I’ll be nice to you, fucking hell.” You know that’s not true but sometimes being mean to him is the only way to get him to shut the fuck up.

”Yes, dear.” He drags a hand down his face, acting resigned to his fate as if he’s not about to get his dick sucked. 

You eye him dubiously, usually you love his spirited nature, but right now you’d much rather he just relax, he never does that these days.

You wrap a loose hand over his cock and stroke it gently, the barely there pressure a tease of a touch more than anything. “Jinwoo…” you coo softly, your fingertips running up his cock lightly, “Will you let me take care of you? Pretty please?” you ask nicer this time, trying to soften him up to the idea of not pushing himself for fucking once.

Jinwoo sighs in that way he always does when he’s about to tell you no, so you lean forward lick a stripe up his cock before taking the head in your mouth and swirling your tongue over the tip. He takes a shuddering breath and seems to pause in his answering so you pull off and plead again, “Please, baby? I like taking care of you, you know I do. Let me?” You don’t waste time before putting your mouth back on his cock, he hasn’t even answered yet but you need to keep him in your good graces. Is this a little manipulative? Definitely, but god forbid this man be kind to himself so maybe you need to take drastic measures. 

“Okay- okay, you win-” he concedes, voice a little strained, hands gripping tightly at the counter. That was actually easier than you thought it would be. You wonder if he’s wound up after a whole week in a system dungeon, doesn’t time pass differently there? You can’t remember. Regardless, you'll do what you can to help. 

  You hum around his cock, delighted due to his obedience, happily taking him deeper into your mouth in turn. The weight of his cock on your tongue feels good almost too much so. Sometimes you wonder if you’re a little too far gone for this man. Sitting with half of him in your mouth for a moment, the rest of his cock in your hand, you wonder what kind of face he’s making. Is he finally being patient? He’s stopped bitching at least. All that you hear from him is heavy pants as you begin to bob your head. He whines a little as you rub circles into his hip with your thumb, a silent plea for him to not buck his hips. When you’re pretty sure you’ve gotten the message across you take his cock down to the base. It invades your throat and you struggle with its size, trying desperately to accommodate and not pull off entirely. Jinwoo gives a choked moan and pride surges through you despite your current struggle.

You must accidentally dig your nails into Jinwoo’s hip as suddenly there’s a hand on the back of your head holding you there. “Shh, it’s okay you’re doing amazing,” he says, panting slightly, “When you pull back breathe through your nose. You know how to do this, you’re almost there, just relax.” You squirm under his hold a little, not because you want him to let go, it’s the opposite really. His sweet words flood heat to your stomach and you’re reminded very quickly that you’re not wearing any clothes when your cock throbs. You manage to further relax your throat, but you get to a point where you absolutely need to breathe so you tap his leg and he lets go of your head. You pull back slightly, making sure to keep half of him in your mouth while you take a breath, before taking him back into your throat. You gag around him a bit, drool sliding down your chin faster than before. 

“Can I grab your hair- please-“ he begs, voice strained. 

You take a moment to suck on the tip of his cock before pulling off entirely, “Mhm, go for it. You can move my head around if it would help you feel good, I know it’s been a while since I’ve done this…” Not that that’s your fault, he never fucking lets you, always too determined to fuck you within an inch of your life. 

“I- You’re doing perfect I just…” you raise an eyebrow at him, Jinwoo never gets this embarrassed you wonder what it could be. 

“If there’s anything-?” You want him to feel good. 

“Can… I cum on your face?” You hum in faux contemplation, you’re going to say yes but it feels good to see him stare at you longingly, eyes blown wide, red splotching his cheeks. 

“You wanna mark me? That it?” You stroke his cock slowly, it twitches in your hand, how delightful. 

“Yeah,” he says, nearly choking on the word. 

“Mm, sounds nice. Go ahead baby, take what you need.” You say sweetly, taking a steadying breath before you take the tip of his cock into his mouth. Barely a moment later he grabs a fistful of your hair and shoves your head down onto his cock entirely, forcing himself into your throat. You gag harshly and a loud moan escapes him, echoing through the room. With one hand on his hip to steady yourself, your other hand sneaks down to your own cock, finally granting yourself some relief. You fist your cock and tug at it harshly, now that you’re finally touching yourself you’re unwilling to build up slowly; you’ve been waiting long enough. Jinwoo uses your mouth not aggressively but it’s forceful enough to make you gag on every thrust, tears streaming down your face.

“F-fuck, you’re so pretty when you cry…” he chokes out, tightening his grip on your hair before he pulls you off for a second. “Breathe.” You take a few harsh gasping breaths, then he guides it back into your mouth and quickly shoves your head down; breaching your throat once again. This time he doesn’t pull your head off, he keeps you there, squirming. You dig your nails into his hip and tug rapidly at your own cock, twisting your wrist on every stroke, getting more desperate as Jinwoo uses you. You can’t even see him anymore, tears flowing too openly. You fear you must look like a mess. With spit pouring down your chin onto your chest, cheeks soaked with tears, cock spilling precum over your hand; truly this man knows how to reduce you to nothing. You’re glad that Jinwoo seems to be enjoying the show at least. More than enough proof coming in the form of him panting, whines escaping him whenever your throat constricts around him.

Eventually he yanks your head back, tugging at his cock quickly, your spit making his hand slide across his skin with a quick slick sound. You kneel at his feet gasping harshly, your own pleasure paused momentarily. You close your eyes and the sound of his broken moans mingle with your gasping breaths. It fills the air and for a second it’s all you know.

“I-” he starts, just slightly too late, cumming on your face without any real warning. You whine quietly, you love him so much. You wish you could see the blissed out look on his face but you know he wants to look at what he’s done to you for a minute. 

Unable to help it, your tongue pokes out and licks a drop of his cum off your lip, it’s terrible, truly. You don’t mind if it’s him though. Especially because he moans a little at the sight. 

“There’s ah, hold on.” Water runs for a moment and then a warm wet cloth gently dabs at your face, notably your eyelids, he must not have wanted you to get anything in your eye. “You can open your eyes now.”

You blink your eyes open a few times even as he continues to wipe softly at your face, cleaning tears off your cheeks and saliva off your chin. He looks at you intently as he cleans you up, determined to do a good job, he’s too sweet sometimes.

“You didn’t cum,” he says, matter of fact.

Shrugging, “I was more focused on you, I’m not concerned.” You’re hoping he drops it but you suspect he won’t. You will your boner to magically fucking disappear.

“I am,” he insists and you don’t have time to stop him before he moves and drops to his knees beside you.

“You’re injured-ah!” Your protests about his health are cut off when he takes your cock into his hand. He strokes it twice before running his thumb over the tip and you give a choked whimper, bucking your hips. 

Grasping for his wrist you try desperately to pull his arm away as he strokes your cock but you feel weak all over. “You- I can’t- Jinwoo!” As you call his name you fold over, spilling cum over his hand. You sob broken syllables that sound like a mantra of pleas as he continues to jerk at your cock until tears are streaming down your face again. 

When you bat weakly at him he finally lets go of your cock and you lean against him, panting. He presses a kiss to the side of your head and you whine, if he says a single fucking thing about this you swear to god; you'll have to kill him.

“That was faster than usual,” he comments idly, as if talking about the weather. 

“A week! You were gone for a week!” You smack him tiredly, you know it doesn’t phase him at all but it’s the thought that counts. This is why you didn’t want him to touch you, you were entirely too wound up, you knew if he put his hands on you at all you’d embarrass yourself. He sighs and kisses the side of your head again, mumbling an apology into your hair. You sigh in return and nod against him despite the pit it sets in your stomach. You wish he wouldn’t do that now, you hate apology sex, that’s not what this was supposed to be. 

You try to push yourself off the floor only to find your legs weak, man fuck Jinwoo, you hate that guy. Your face goes red as you mumble, “Help me up…” you tack on just for good measure, “And if you laugh I’ll kill you.” 

“Of course, of course.” He stands with a grace that you envy and proceeds to not help you up but instead sweep you up into his arms. You make some vague noises of protest that he ignores and he laughs quietly. He sets you on the counter and kneels to slip your socks off, he really is acting like he’s not hurt at all. You didn’t do much to help, did you? 

You sigh, disappointment filling you, so much for caring for him, things really have changed. He’s going so many places you can’t reach; what are you supposed to do with that knowledge? What will you do the day he doesn’t need you anymore? It feels like that day has already gone and passed and you’re not sure why he keeps coming home to you. 

“You’re getting in your head,” he says from where he’s knelt before you. 

You hum and give a noncommittal shrug, unsure where to even start. Hopping off the counter you softly mumble, “I’m going to shower.” When you shuffle past him you enter the bathroom and make a point to gently close the door behind you, despite the original intention of a shared shower. It’s a quiet sign that you want to be alone. Despite this, he enters a few moments later, once you’ve turned the water on. You sigh, he’s terrible at reading signals, or maybe he just prefers to ignore them. 

”Hey,” Jinwoo starts as he wraps his arms around you from behind, flattening himself against your back. “Did I hurt you?”

There’s no point in hiding it, ”No… yes… it’s not you, I just miss meaning something to you.” He makes a wounded sound that you can hear clearly over the water. It’s surely warm enough by now but his arms tighten around you and you’re unable to step under it, trapped in his hold. 

Resting his chin on the top of your head he asks quietly, “Why would you ever think you don’t?”

You sigh restlessly and pull yourself from his arms, “You know how I used to have a purpose? You would come home beat to shit after a raid and I would take care of you? That doesn’t happen anymore! I even had one job today and I fucked it up! I barely did anything for you! I didn’t even tend to your wounds…” You find yourself breathing heavy, tears beginning to spill from your eyes. You sniffle hard, wiping at them aggressively. Digging the heels of your palms into your eyes you wail your biggest fear, “ I don’t have any use to you anymore!”

He tugs one on one of your wrists, pulling on it gently and persistently, until you let it fall away and look at him. ”You don’t need a use, dumbass. You’re not a tool. You’re the love of my life,” he says it so straight faced you physically reel back, accidentally stepping directly into the shower stream and scaring the crap out of yourself. You jump out of your skin when the water touches you suddenly. Jinwoo has to use his hold on your wrist to pull you into his chest, keeping you from falling. 

Your tears freeze up out of shock, “You don’t have to be mean about it!” You cry, shrilly, “I’m wallowing!” You push off his chest and scrub any remaining tears off your face.

”You’re being stupid!”

”Ouch!” The mood feels worlds lighter, Was that it? Did you really think of yourself only as a tool? You feel like this insecurity won’t go away overnight but at the moment you feel less like you’re drowning so there’s that. Regardless of your lighter mood you sigh, “I still think you should get beat up more often, I like taking care of you.” It’s mostly a joke but there’s a crumb of truth to it, maybe you guys can compromise somewhere. Perhaps he could come home for dinner more often or something, you’ll talk to him about it later.

”That’s…” he pauses for a while before he sighs and goes on, “I didn’t get beat up.” He rubs the back of his head, a nervous tick he’s never quite kicked. “I tripped leaving the system gate. Busted my face on a pile of rocks if you can believe it…” He can’t meet your eyes, looking anywhere else as his face goes quickly red.

You blink at him, wide-eyed, “No fucking way…”

He groans as if he’s dying, ”Do you think I would make that up for fun?”

You can’t help it, laughter bubbles out of your throat and escapes you in uncontrollable bursts. You can’t breathe, you’re going to die, holy shit there’s no way. Oh man, you shouldn’t be laughing at him like this but it’s just so human. 

You have tears in your eyes as you tell him, “I love you so much- you are so uncool.”

Jinwoo’s head whips towards you, cheeks still red, “Says the guy who-” 

You nearly choke on your words trying to get them out faster than he can, “Do not finish that sentence!”

He holds up his hands in surrender before scratching at his chin, “You know… I thought it was kinda cute.”

You turn away quickly, padding over to mess with the water temperature, “What was that? I can’t hear you over the water!” 

Jinwoo silently comes up behind you, which shouldn’t even be possible with the wet floor, bullying you up against the wall. He boxes you in from behind and speaks into your ear, “If you’re that pent up… How many orgasms do you think I can wring out of you?” You shudder against him and open your mouth to speak but only a whine comes out when he places a loose hand on your throat. Not to choke, just resting there and feeling your pulse more than anything. “Let me take care of you this time, hm?”

“Hah- Jinwoo-” you whine. This man fights dirtier than anyone you’ve ever met. Maybe you can’t say anything, you did the same shit earlier, turnabout is fair play and all. 

[ghuleh-recs]

It's @chapel-of-rizztual's birthday!! So obviously I had to make us a mixtape of my favorite rizz fics. I was stoked to make this one because it meant I got to reread some of my favorite ghoul smut 😈 If you follow rizz you know what a joy it is to realize you're both on tumblr at the same time. You'll notice your feed slowly being taken over in the best possible way by a wonderful stream of consciousness reblogging spree. I have to add that chapel-of-rizztual is so damn supportive of fellow creatives, as well--sharing anything and everything we make. So let's all treat ourselves to some s tier ghoul smut in rizz's honor and maybe leave a comment or two as a lil' bday treat. ♡

recs under the cut.

In the heat of the moment - phantom x rain x mountain (polyghouls)

“Shit, I’m sorry-I didn’t realise.” He raises his arms as Rain pulls a clean hoodie on him. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.” Rain chuckles lightly, running a hand across Phantoms chest, smoothing out the hoodie. “You’re in heat, darling. I wouldn’t expect anything different.” He blinks up confusedly at Rain trying to take in what he’d just said to him. “I-what? What!?” Or…. Phantom goes into heat onstage but doesn’t realise because it’s his first one topside.

The only exception - aether x dewdrop

Aether smiles sweetly at him, brushing a few stray hairs from his face. “You feel better after that, Honeydrop?” Dew nods, not trusting his voice. His eyes drop down to Aethers lips for a spit second before looking back into his eyes. Aether chuckles lightly. “You want a kiss, darling?” Dew nods again and Aether surges forward to capture Dews lips in his. He gives Dew a few little pecks before pulling back. Dew whines and follows his lips. “More.” He whispered. Aether cradles his cheek and pull him in for another kiss, a proper kiss thins time, not just little pecks. Dew let’s Aether lead the the kiss, letting himself melt completely into it with a contented sigh. Or… After a stressful day Dewdrop finds himself seeking comfort from the one ghoul he trusts the most.

tumblr ficlet - lingerie - cumulus x mountain x swiss x phantom x rain

“I-uh- well, we? We all saw it in the shopping centre the other day. And we all thought- well it’s just- we all thought of you? So…yeah.” Mountain fidgets nervously as he edges his way towards the door. “I’m-uh- going back to my room, the other are also there. You can-Uh-you can join us when you unwrap it.” He seem to snap out his nervousness for a second. “If you want! There’s no pressure! I just..yeah, no pressure.” He gives her an awkward thumbs up and slips out the door without another word. Cumulus would laugh at him if she wasn’t so excited to find out what was making him so nervous. She tears the paper from the box, giggling and rolling her eyes when she recognises the lingerie brand that’s stamped on the box. Typical Boys.

Don't want to close my eyes - mountain & aether (& dew)

Mountain’s insomnia has been flaring up recently, the past few weeks he’d been getting less and less sleep each night, which led to the last couple of nights where he’d been unable to sleep. Tossing turning in his bed, eyes heavy, unable to switch his brain off. He’d given up trying to sleep tonight. His room felt too suffocating, too familiar, the endless tossing and turning had become boring. Or… Mountain hasn’t been sleeping. Aether helps.

With desire flowing through my veins - copia x mountain

After realising no one had seen Mountain for almost a week, Copia, riddled with anxiety and worry, sets out to find the Earth Ghoul. He gets a little more then he bargained for when he does eventually find him.

tumblr ficlet - first time - dewdrop x phantom

Despite what everyone thought, Dew liked the new ghoul. Sure, he wasn’t Aether, but Dew didn’t think that was a bad thing. He liked how easy the new ghoul was. How desperate for attention he was, how he’d do anything with a simple command, no fighting back. Dew liked how much control he had over him, something he never really had before, he liked how he could do anything to the new ghoul and he didn’t even question it, he’s just happy to be getting the attention he desperately wanted.

tumblr ficlet - body worship - copia x dewdrop

It was a joke. A self deprecating one, but a joke non the less. And it had made the congregation at mass laugh, all be it an awkward laugh, but it was a laugh and Copia was taking that as a win.  Dew didn’t find it funny. If he’s being honest he didn’t really understand what Copia was trying to get at, he’d always viewed the man as some above godly creature, so to hear him say something so…low about himself made an uneasy feeling swirl in his belly. 

𖤐 you know the drill--bookmark, read, and leave kudos/comments!

Did I forget your favorite? You've got a standing invitation from me to add your own rec and reblog ♡

[cleminthewriter]

Mom Said It’s My Turn To Do The Writing

This was supposed to be a small fluff drabble but i quickly realized that I can’t write anything under 300 words for the life of me so here’s a full one shot. Enjoy :D

~~~~~~~~~~~

Alex wasn’t really sure how long the two had been running for. Maybe minutes, maybe hours,maybe for just seconds. But Alex could tell by now they really couldn’t keep it up. Their legs were shaking which each step, their breathing had quickened, and everything seemed to be blurred despite having their glasses on. Clyde seemed filled with just enough energy to keep going, surely it wouldn’t notice if Alex took a small break to catch their breath and lean against a tree.

But notice it did. Alex watched through closing eyes as Clyde ran back over to check on them. 

“Sandwich Human! We don’t have time! They’re gonna get you!” Clyde hurried them. Alex held up a finger to signal for a minute. Then got off the tree and ran a bit further… before losing breath again and falling over.

Clyde rushed over to them, panicking. “Sandwich Human you are not dying today! There’s far more that needs to happen and your death is not for a while.” Clyde muttered. It placed a hand on Alex, which immediately made them sit up.

The duo had found out just a little bit ago the two can touch without Alex dying (immediately), Now after months of trying not to touch each other, it just felt… strange. It wasn’t like it hurt; Alex was just expecting to suddenly feel more teeth and to start coughing blood, and not just a semi-solid ooz hand (?) on their shoulder.

Clyde had already removed its hand from Alex, but still looked concerned. Then it seemed to have an idea. “Don't panic over what I’m about to do.” The veldigun told them. Before Alex could even question what they were about to do, they were immediately picked up by the veldigun. 

“Come on, let’s go find a cave or somewhere and get you some rest.” Clyde whispered as it began to run and locate a good place for the duo to sleep for the night. 

Alex really hadn’t been held like this since they were incredibly young. They had just grown out of asking to be carried and by then they were far too tall to be carried properly. Clyde was a bit taller than them, and was way stronger as well. It was odd, but strangely comforting to be carried around like they weighed nothing.

Just as Alex grew comfortable with being carried, Clyde looked to the side in joy. “Finally! A good cave!” It announced as it brought Alex inside. Clyde seemed to search around for some unknown reason before placing Alex down in a spot far from the opening. It readjusted the blanket Alex had been carrying to be wrapped around them.

“We need a nest, stay here.” Clyde whispered as it scurried away. 

Wow, tonight was a night of firsts for Alex, wasn’t it. They were hunted by the police for the first time, ran for more than half an hour for the first time, were carried for the first time in years, and now they were sleeping in a nest for the first time. Last time they had this many first was their 18th birthday, first time drinking and first time waking up in Mr. Jones’s shed with their clothes on backwards. What a night they still couldn’t remember.

As Alex thought about this in a headspace they were too sleepy to actually think about things logically, they had barely noticed Clyde coming back with a pile of supplies, which was now being used to make a makeshift nest. Alex examined the nest closely. It had what looked like some tree branches, leaves, some discarded trash, what was either a tent or a hammock, and fluff that they couldn’t identify (maybe it was cotton, maybe it was spider webs, maybe- actually, Alex didn't want to know). Alex was still unsure of how it was being held together because it looked poorly woven, until they noticed Clyde gliding a finger across the nest structure, leaving a trail of goo(?). So that was that question answered.

Eventually once Clyde had finished construction of the nest, it reapproached the human. “Alright, the nest is done, from the position of the moon it’s should be 4 or 5 am, so I’m gonna block the cave and sleep with you. So you hop in the nest, be there in a minute.” It told the human before grabbing leftover branches to cover the opening with. 

Alex made an “attempt” to move into the nest, but they were so tired they’d rather just lay on the ground then move another inch. It made them feel terrible cause Clyde just spent its time building a nest that it didn't need to, but here Alex was not getting in it. God they were just like their old family cat, Neptune, who never slept in the nice cat beds they’d buy him and instead sleep in the box it came in. Neptune was a nice cat, don’t get Alex wrong, just a tad annoying. Shame Neptune went missing mysteriously one day- actually no wait now that they think about it, it was highly likely Clyde had found him first and-

“Need help Sandwich Human?” Clyde offered as it towered over their body. Alex just made a vague yes noise and grabby hands. They heard the veldigun laugh as it picked them up. 

“Wow, your way more tired than I expected.” It chuckled as it laid the both of them in the nest. “Six, this must be what Winfrey felt when I stayed up past 6 am hunting and begged to be carried to our nest.” It chuckled again.

They stayed like that for a minute. While the nest was comfy, Alex found themselves unable to truly fall asleep. “Blanket maybe?” They thought as they unwrapped their blanket and threw half over Clyde. It was probably cold as well. Clyde seemed a bit shocked to have gotten half of the blanket around it as well, but grateful nonetheless.

Alex, however, was still having trouble sleeping. They were incredibly tired, but couldn’t get to that state where they were asleep. 

Clyde looked soft.

Alex wrapped themselves around the veldigun. This was something they probably would have considered a death wish maybe a few months ago, but at this moment it just felt… right. 

There was a small pause between the two. Maybe Alex had taken it too far, maybe this was the moment Clyde decided they were too much trouble, maybe-

Clyde wrapped its own arms around Alex, and its tail wrapped around theirs. This was… incredibly comforting. Maybe tonight had been, probably the worst in all of Alex’s life, but right now, in this cave, in this nest, in a moment of peace between human and eldritch beast, Alex had a thought they hadn’t thought in sometime:

“Maybe things will be ok.”

[beastofburdenxo]

Raising Catherine chapter 3

Catherine has turned 18, and things are getting complicated. MINORS DNI 2k words

tags: masturbation, Voyeurism (Tommy is literally a peeping Tom), use of alcohol, possible non con if you squint.

It was Catherine’s 18th birthday. Tommy decided to take her on a picnic like they did when she was little to celebrate. Just the two of them. It was a nice sunny day out as he laid out the blanket and she took the sandwiches and other snacks out of the basket. “Happy birthday, love,” proclaimed Tommy as he pulled a little box out of his pocket, “A little something for my not so little girl.” Catherine opened the box to find a little ruby pendant in the shape of a heart, with a petite gold chain. “Oh Tommy,” Catherine cried out, “You shouldn’t have! It's beautiful!” He took it to help put it around her neck. “Thank you so much I love it!” Tommy kissed her forehead, “You’re welcome sweetheart, every woman should have at least one good piece of jewelry, eh? I saw it in the store window, and I just knew it belonged around your neck.” Catherine was so giddy about her new gift, and it brought joy to Tommy to see her like that. He loved making her happy, regardless of if others thought that he was giving her special treatment. He thought that she deserved it, after all, he made a promise, didn’t he?  

“Oh, won’t be long now and you’ll be leaving me behind, eh?” Tommy joked. Deep down he knew that one day she would, and that brought him deep sadness. “Oh, stop it Tommy, I'm just now 18. You act like you’re some ancient old man just withering away!” Tommy laughed, “Well dear I am pushing 40, sometimes I feel older than that.” “Well, you don’t look it,” Catherine replied, “Who knows, you might get married off before I do! You might just be leaving me!” Tommy was married years ago, before she came into the picture, but his wife suddenly died. He doesn’t speak of her much, but paintings of her are all over the house. “I’m sorry Tommy,” Catherine finally realized what she said after a moment of silence, “I know it’s a sore subject for you. Forget I said it.” Tommy gave her shoulder a soft nudge, “It’s okay, love. Being married feels like a lifetime ago. I’ll always love her, but I know she would want me to be happy with someone and marry again if I so choose. I'm not against it, it just hasn’t happened. Besides, why on earth would I marry and leave my girl behind, eh? You are stuck with me I’m afraid.”  

A comfortable silence follows as they begin to dig into their food. “Would I make a good wife, Tommy?” Catherine suddenly asks. Tommy almost chokes on his sandwich, “Y-Y-Yes you would,” he manages to sputter out, “You are smart, funny, talented, respectful.... And quite the beautiful woman.” Catherine turns away at this, as she doesn’t want him to see how flushed her face is at his compliments, “Any man would be lucky to have you, love. Why? Is there someone in mind?” Tommy asks lightly, not wanting to let on that his blood is boiling. He isn’t ready for her to marry off. “No, I was just wondering.” Tommy puts on a small smile at this, “Don’t worry too much about it, love, you have plenty of time for all that. Focus on your schooling, you are almost done. Top of your class, eh? My smart girl?” Catherine throws a grape at him; he dodges it with a laugh. “Plenty of time,” he thinks to himself, “Plenty of time, relax Tom. No need to take your gun out again. Relax. She is still yours.” After the picnic, there is more celebrating to be had at the Garrison. Arthur snuck Catherine a shot of whiskey, “Just between us, yeah? Tommy would have me shot if he found out.” With a wink. Polly baked a beautiful cake, and everyone had a great time.  

That night at home, after a few more drinks snuck under the table, Catherine made her way to Tommy’s bedroom. He was still up, sitting in bed with his usual paperwork. “There’s the birthday girl,” he exclaimed, “Did you have fun today?” Trying her very best to walk right, she made her way closer to him. “I-I-I did, Tommy,” she managed to get out, the whiskey was starting to get to her head. “Can I sleep with you tonight? Pleeeease?” Tommy raised his eyebrows at this, “Now Cathy dear, you aren’t 12 anymore, it’s inappropriate to share a bed with me now. You are grown, what if the maids find out? What then, hmm?” Sitting on the bed to keep from falling over you chuckle, “Who cares? If they tell you can just fire them, right?” Tommy swats her with his papers, “Catherine Michelle, you know better! What has gotten into you?” Coming closer to her he smells it, “Have you been drinking?! Damn it, Arthur!” This causes her to fall over with a case of giggles. Tommy takes off his glasses with a sigh, “Alright, get in. Only because you’ll probably be sick in the morning.” Catherine clumsily makes her way under the covers. “Go straight to sleep now. I've got a busy day tomorrow. And from now on you will sleep in your bed!” Catherine curls up next to Tommy, trying her best to hold back her laughter, “Well of course Mr. Shelby sir.” Tommy just rolls his eyes with a smile, “Good night, Cathy, I love you.” “I love you too Tommy, no good night kiss?” Catherine cackles. “Oh, for God sakes, go to sleep!” 

It was a long night for Tommy. The whiskey put Catherine right out, but he just couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t stop looking at her, she looked like a little angel next to him. He knows that he fussed at her, but deep down he wouldn’t care if she slept with him every night. And she was right about the maids, they could easily be fired. He loved having her next to him, even in an innocent way like this. Things could easily be not so innocent; he could just reach over and take her at any time. But he showed restraint. She deserved better than him, even though at the same time he wanted no one else to have her. Let's just say things have gotten complicated since she’s gotten older. He decides to get up before the restraint wears off and try and do some work. At his desk, thoughts of her in his bed keep running through his mind. Catherine lying there in a little silk nightie, beckoning him to her. Him sliding the straps gently off her shoulders as she steps out of it for him. Gliding his hands over every inch of her body. Her smiling at him as she undoes his pants for him.... “Stop it,” he thinks to himself, “Just stop it, Tom. It's wrong to think like this.” But it’s too late, his body has reacted to his little fantasy. His erection out and proud, demanding attention. From Catherine specifically.  

“Just go over there and take her,” a little voice demands, “She is pretty much yours; you’ve scared every other man in town. Give her what you know she wants from you!” While arguing with the voices in his head, he is oblivious to the fact that he squeezed his pen so hard it burst. Ink is all over his hands, and his paperwork. He notices his hands and throws the pen across the room in frustration. “Tommy...” A little voice comes in the doorway, “I woke up and you were gone.” Catherine walks into his office rubbing her eyes. Tommy scoots his chair up just in time to hide his problem. “Sorry love couldn’t sleep. Thought I'd do some work and made a mess instead.” Holding up his dirty hands, “Do you care to go get me a wet rag sweetheart? Before it dries.” In the time it took catherine (still half drunk) to get a rag and come back, Tommy managed to calm himself down. It's a good thing too, because when she made it back, she pulled his chair back and plopped down on his lap. She grabbed his big hands and proceeded to try and wipe the ink off. “I’ve got it, go back to sleep love.” He told her to try to get her away in case of another surprise appearance, but she wouldn’t hear of it. “It’s alright, I've got it. You’ll wind up getting ink everywhere.” She looked so cute on his lap, drunk and sleepy while still trying to concentrate on his hands. “You’ve got something else for her to concentrate on, eh Tom?” the voice teased, making him tense up. He lightly pushes her off his lap, heart racing. “Go on to sleep Cathy, it’s late now, eh? You need to sleep the rest of that whiskey off.” She stands shakily, putting the rag down on his desk. “Tuck me in?” she asks, her eyes big and sweet. Tommy can’t take much more of this. “Go. Now.” he points sternly across the hall, “Don’t make me carry you like a sack of potatoes.” This causes Catherine to pout, but she leaves like he asked. But, not without mumbling, “You are mean Mr. Shelby.”  

Many hours later, or what seemed like it, Tommy decided to try and sleep again. His hands are still slightly gray from the faded ink, he assumes he’ll have to wear the rest of it off. Reaching the doorway, he sees Catherine lying in his bed, moonlight coming from the window making her glow. She is breathing heavily, at first, he thinks she’s in the middle of a drunken nightmare. Then he hears it, A soft whimper coming from her lips. He can’t see one hand, but he sees the other squeezing her breast. She is neither asleep nor having a nightmare. She is masturbating. In his bed. He stands frozen, watching her. Catherine’s big eyes are closed in pleasure as her hips start to rock. Tommy doesn’t know what to do. Does he ignore her? Help her? Leave? With all honesty he wants to watch her, especially since they are now alone in the house. The maids left hours ago. He is afraid that she will eventually notice his shadow looming in the doorway, so he sneaks into his own bedroom. Her eyes are still closed, back softly arching exposing her hard nipples through her gown to him. He grabs the cover while she is still at work, and slowly pulls it off her. Her pale legs spread in the moonlight for him. He moves to the corner farthest from her, hand now in his pants at the sight of her.  

Tommy can hear just how wet she is in the silent room. He is fascinated by every sweet sound she makes. She is just so pretty. Just for him. He times his own strokes with hers, biting his lip to stay quiet and hidden from her in the dark. “Tommy...” Catherine whispers, “Tommy...” Hearing this causes Tommy’s eyes to roll back as he silently comes all over his hand. She was touching herself to the thought of him. She was for sure his now. In a moment of pure bliss, she cries his name one last time as she comes all over his sheets. Her whole body was shaking. Tommy can’t take it anymore; he must go to her. He fixes himself and goes to bed, taking her in his arms. “Shhh, Shhh,” he coos in Catherine’s ear, “That’s it, I'm here now.” He rubs her back as she comes down. “My angel, thinking of me, eh? Such a good girl. I love you so much.” Catherine is still quite drunk and doesn’t realize that he watched the whole show. “I love you too, Tommy. Will you tuck me in now?” With a chuckle he replies, “Yes sweetheart, but let me clean your hands first.” He goes to get a warm wet rag and now it’s his turn to clean her up. He puts the cover back on the bed and puts her underneath it. Catherine scoots over for him, and he sits right on the wet spot she made. He lies in it with a smile. Knowing that she is his just as much as he is hers. She just may not remember it tomorrow.  

[nights-at-crystarium]

January 9 is Vivi’s birthday \;w;/ The date’s cheeky, it’s when I reached ShB on him ingame. A year ago. JUST A YEAR. No other oc of mine had such an intense development process. I wanted to try writing a disaster, and, well....

Lemme have today as an excuse to ramble about his influences. Of course I didn’t merely lump these together, I kept realizing the likeness as time went on.

The concentration of unhinged blondies and literal idols is past the critical level, take cover, it’s gonna blow.

Spoiler warning for everything.

Anarchy Panty

Because his full name’s Vivien Fucksalot Rell x’D A good number of their tropes match perfectly.

This speech could as well be copypasted into his final battle with Emet:

Panty: You're right, I'm just a little bitch and I'm proud of it. But guess what, douchebag? That's not the point. News flash, I don't need special fucking powers to beat the shit out of you. You know why? Because I'm a bitch who doesn't give a fuck. You and your half-dead face can preach about hymens and demons and other weird words that supposedly mean shit, but that doesn't change the fact that if any of you fuckers get in my way, I'm gonna kick some twisted-ass ass. You hear me dick? I'm a hot bitch angel named Panty. And no matter what anyone says, I DO WHAT I FUCKING WANT!

Princess Ai

An edgy fashion icon that I'm still in love with. Brainstorming the visual styles for Vivi, I simply decided to indulge as hard as I can.

Howl

Howl gets his redemption arc, Vivi, uh.... Surprise, the entire ShB part of Fragments is his redemption arc of sorts. But he exists outside ShB as well. He’s not meant to be a goody two shoes. But hey, his drama queen moments are entertaining to watch.

Raha has a lot of Howl in his character too. With Vivi, he’s basically this, except he doesn’t swallow him.. Okay he does but in a different way *kicked*

Arataka Reigen

Because I’m physically incapable of writing a classic hero.

Vivi has a complicated relationship with his career and a pragmatic approach to most things in life. He also prefers words to violence, will fight only if that fails.

When confidence and persuasion carry so hard you don’t really need anything else. Vivi firmly believes in everything he says and does. He doesn’t derive any fucked up joy from being right, but he knows as a fact that he IS right.

Sakuma Ryuichi

Duality my beloved \o/ And dorkiness. Other than that, Ryuichi doesn’t have as much influence on his character, but the visuals?

I mean I literally use this shirt and necklace as an easter egg/homage. Gravitation triggered my queer awakening in the faraway 2006, might as well give it the acknowledgement it deserves.

And, lastly, the he.

What else do you expect from a character tailored for a ship \o/

Short. Sassy. Dorky. Gremlin. All of their direct likeness stems from ARR, while the more subtle parallels and extreme opposite values form later.

If Raha’s eccentric, Vivi takes that just a tad bit further, simply because he’s always been allowed to.

What Raha keeps repressed, buried deep down, Vivi embraces in full. He’s an unruly, effervescent spark of life, he’s meant to be Raha’s “manic pixie dream boy” according to tvtropes, to slowly lure him out of his shell and teach him confidence, the joy of living, and find a way to stop him from killing himself over and over again.

Words of praise and affirmation have no effect on them. Both are competent in some field, but never brag about it. While Raha has a severe imposter syndrome, Vivi knows he’s cool as a fact, which still doesn't mean he loves or values himself as he should. He just acknowledges and uses his status for his own benefit as openly as the world keeps using himself.

Destiny (affectionate) and destiny (derogatory).

Raha’s The Adult (tm) Vivi needs to stay somewhat stable. This’s the reason they don’t quite get along in ARR yet, Raha must go through that century of suffering that, despite all common sense, refines him into something delightful, Vivi must go through HW-SB to realize his priorities in life and frankly get fucked up enough to form a perfect chemistry with Exarch.

Raha has a moral compass that he may adjust at will, Vivi has none at all. How much more questionable would they be if they weren’t cute and charismatic :’D

They’re feisty and competitive towards each other, Raha especially so. Vivi has a red cloth effect on him. Forever wrestling for that imaginary control (yep, in bed too). On the emotional side, it’s forever “you matter, I don’t”. They’re mirrors of each other, reflecting some parts as they are, twisting others in most peculiar ways.

Vivi literally wouldn’t exist without Raha, both ic and ooc. So I daresay Raha has the most influence on his character, at the same time he’s his own guy enough to stay interesting. I’m so proud of him. I’m holding him by the scruff and helplessly shaking him in the air.

[under-the-eye]

Joshua’s Prayer Journal

Dear Watcher,

It’s my eighteenth birthday, and James is gone. He ran away in the middle of the night with Jonah Shearer. 

Mom hasn’t stopped crying all day. Dad has been driving around looking for them, and sometimes he calls to yell at mom, saying it’s her fault and calling James all kinds of names and slurs.

I’m sad that it had to come to this, but I’m not sad about James. I know my brother. He was always so reserved, so afraid of something being wrong with him or getting on Dad’s bad side, but when he was with Jonah he just opened up. He laughed, told jokes, grinned in that way I’ve rarely seen since we were eight. Being with Jonah makes him happy. 

The Irisites always preached that being gay was wrong, because of a quote from the Book of Sclera: 10. Lie not with those to which you are unwed, nor a man with a man or a woman with a woman, for I have created them as two halves of one whole, to be joined in sacred union that can never be broken.

But today, while Dad was driving around and Mom was crying, I snuck onto the computer the way Penny taught me and went to the website of the Scleran church she goes to in Willow Creek. They had a PDF of your book that was a different translation than the Irisite one, and in that one the verse read: Nor a man with a boy or a woman with a girl, for I have created children as one half of a whole, to grow in trust and love that should never be broken. To me, that sounds more like outlawing child abuse than forbidding gay relationships. 

I don’t know for sure which translation is right. But what I do know is that Jonah makes my brother happy, and in the Book of Symns it is written: The Gaze of the Watcher is not a burden to be borne, but rather a holy gift of joy. 2. To find joy in one’s life is the greatest joy of the Watcher, the Holy Creator who crafted each Sim in perfection, who knows all of one’s flaws and desires. 3. It wants nothing more than for It’s children to find joy, as a parent does their child. That translation was the same in the Scleran version of the book. 

I’m starting to have second thoughts. Not about you, but about my parents. About the Irisites. It never seemed like anyone in my church was ever truly happy. Everyone pretends to be happy, because they’re supposed to be, but none of it ever felt genuine. 

I promised James I wouldn’t try to get in contact with him until he made the first move, in case our parents found out and tried to use me to get to him, but it might be time to talk to Penny.

[sashi-ya]

➡ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐦 𝐖𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 ~ 𝐊𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐤𝐢 𝐁𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐱 𝐅! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 [𝐂𝐡.7]

so, I know I took a LOT but since today is the baby's birthday... what's better than posting it today? please, enjoy this chapter that's the end's begin! I won't say much, but expect the unexpected! 🙊

tw: no nsfw! i think there aren't a lot of things to warn for this chap, because if I do i might spoil you! however, if you find something that triggers you please tell me and I'll add it! love u all 💖 also, I have inspired the "scientific" part in Masaki and Isshin's past. Also, it is not stated anywhere in bleach (yet) that pregnancy make mothers weak and lose their reiatsu , it's just a hc of mine! This story is about to end, so please, enjoy!

masterlist

A03

wc: 4.9k

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟕: 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠

“I’m just tired, Byakuya… that’s it” you tell him, trying to ease off the fogginess that traps your mind. 

The ever-serious Shinigami tucks your hair behind your ear, being as subtle and delicate as always, with that caring aura that makes you weaker every time. “(Name), I’m not stupid. And I know you aren’t either… could this be…?” 

You widen your eyes, even if you have no energy to stand up or snap back, you quickly deny the pregnancy allegations. “No. Don’t you even mention it…”

The deep blue eyes of your ex-captain keep shining, like you are sure they never did. For the first time you see him smile widely, and his arms surprise you when they hug you tight. This feels nothing like Byakuya, and in fact, you are sure this is just a dream. 

“I’m so happy. I’m so so happy right now” he says, nuzzled on the crook of your neck. “I’m gonna be a father. I- I-“ 

The sudden reaction amazes you. Nothing could have predicted this man to get this happy because of a possible pregnancy. You never thought he would want a child, especially not after the way he treated you a few days ago. 

“I don’t know Byakuya… I- I’m not sure. I didn’t even think of the possibility…” you try to tell him, you have no proof besides your symptoms. Yet, deep inside, you wish there was a light of pure love and joy growing inside you.  

“Let’s go to squad 4! Captain Kotetsu will tell us!” Byakuya chimes, so excited and forgetting he said a few minutes ago that he wanted to protect you and for that you couldn’t go back to the barracks. 

As he lifts you up in his arms once again, he is ready to perform his flash step to get faster to the medical squad of the Gotei 13. But you stop him. 

Uncontrollable tears fall from your eyes, and your fists once again hit his chest. Even if this time your punches are weaker, like the touch of a feather on his skin, he aches. The pain in your eyes, the sloppy mourning… 

“Why are you doing this to me? You rejected me, you humiliated me, you looked down on me, you punished me in front of the people who should respect me… you pushed me away from you, from my squad, from the people I have fought for almost 100 years… and now, you are acting like you are happy?” 

You can feel his arms going weaker, his strong hold becoming a shaky one. His eyes widely open, the shimmer fading. 

He slowly kneels on the ground, with you still in his arms. Looking up to the sky, the tears in his eyes become the perfect mirror in which the moon reflects. “You don’t know, you simply have no idea how much I’ve hurt myself telling you those words back then” he simply whispers. 

You scoff. Himself, he talks about himself. But what about you? What about your reputation and the pain he instilled in your heart? 

“You? You hurt yourself?” you mumble, using what’s left of reiatsu in your body just to tell him the things you need to. “I knew you would never love me. Or at least not the same way you loved Hisana. I know you would never, ever, be able to confront your family again because of me…” you keep going, realizing you should stop, but being unable to do so. 

The tears that fall from his cheeks wet yours as he can’t look you straight into your eyes. He keeps looking at the silver star above the sky, slightly trembling, vanquished, ashamed. 

“And I never asked for it. But you could have told me, we could have worked it out. If you had enough love for me, you would have told me that we couldn’t be together and I’d have respect it that… but you decided to hurt me… you killed my hea-“ 

“STOP IT, (NAME)” Byakuya suddenly screams. He rarely does. In fact, you have never heard him shout. You shut up, scared. The last thing that he is left to do is become violent with you. 

“I don’t- this is not- I-“ he stutters, he clearly can’t speak; tears have taken over, his throat is closed, his tongue is tied. “Don’t do this to me, please. Please (Name). I- I love you more than anything in this world, you simply don’t understand” 

“Love… me?” You can’t say anything else; you can only lift your hand to wipe the tears that pool on his long lashes. “As much as you have hurt me… I can’t afford to see you cry. I’m sorry” you whisper. 

Byakuya looks at you, pulling you closer to his body. He presses his forehead on yours. Both cry, and with no words, the pain, the mistakes, everything washes away. This time there is no rain but the one falling from the sakura trees surrounding you two. The pink petals form a halo of protection, just like Senbonzakura does, around two suffering lovers that couldn’t be away from the other… their souls couldn’t. 

“I only wanted to protect you. I needed all of them to believe you weren’t important to me. Please, try to understand… if they… if they thought you weren’t important, they wouldn’t hurt you.. .I’m sure of that!” he begs for you to believe in him. Byakuya clearly doesn’t know how to lie, so the only way he had to protect you was simply hurting yourself too. It’s not new, he has always been this way. 

You let a little smile take over your lips. Your dizziness can’t stop you from touching his pale countenance. “I love you more than anything in this world, Kuchiki Byakuya” you murmur, caressing his cheek with your thumb. 

He kisses your hand, pain but also relief could be seen in his face. He sits down, nesting you in between his legs. Sliding down his hand to your lower belly, with a soft smile. 

“I swear nothing is ever gonna hurt you two…” he says, sniffling. Byakuya is so sure you are pregnant, like the sky is above and the earth is beneath. 

You giggle… would it be that bad to indulge in the possibility? Your hand lands over his, as he traces little circles over your belly button. “I never thought you wanted this” you whisper, kissing after his cheek. 

“I never thought I would either…” he says; Byakuya may seem like a heartless soul, but he has the biggest one inside of his chest. 

You aren’t sure if you are growing inside you a mini Kuchiki or not, but the only idea of him being happy makes it wanna be true… 

Some minutes pass, but even if he would love to enjoy the moments of peace his sense of responsibility wouldn’t let his mind alone. “(Name), I can’t let you wait. You are really weak now; I almost can’t sense your reia…” 

Darkness again. You feel like floating, like a flame extinguishing.

…

“Doctor Yamada, please come in” 

You hear Byakuya’s voice echoing in your head; you ask yourself who is he talking to since he has never addressed Hanataro that way. And, in any case, where you are exactly. 

"That voice sounds too self-assured to be coming from Hanataro… which Yamada is this?" You mumble, too dizzy to recognize any face around you. 

Someone grabs your hand, and scoffs. "That's my brother, dear. I'm Yamada Seinosuke. The Kuchiki clan doctor" 

You gasp. That means you are then back at the manor… but why? You weren't supposed to be there after all.

"Now, allow me to assess you. I'm worried about your state. And don't worry, Kuchiki-sama is right by your side" he says, allowing you another person to grab your hand. And there is no doubt, that hold is from your delicate noble lover. 

You let the doctor work. He touches your belly, that should be enough for him to sense the growth of new reiatsu… but none of you, nor Byakuya were able to feel it. Instead, it was the constant loss of it what worried Dr. Seinosuke.

You aren't sure what's happening, but you trust them, nevertheless. The doctor keeps thinking and touches your stomach once again. He hums and seems troubled.

Byakuya clearly becomes impatient. A virtue he had managed, was to tame his burning soul but this situation has begun to break him. 

"So, is my w-... is (Name)-san pregnant, Dr?" He asks, stopping himself from calling you his "wife". Even feeling this way, you become sad… it breaks your heart, was he thinking of Hisana? 

Seinosuke covers your stomach with fine cotton sheets and crosses his arms. You can barely see and hear them, but the news are for sure clear to you; "(Name)-San isn't pregnant. She is, however, in terrible danger, her soul chain has been wounded but I don't really know how. This isn't a job for me, this is a job for the twelfth squad… or even… squad zero" 

You can hear Byakuya gasp. In less than a second him and your doctor are out of the room and you are left alone, dizzy and weak for some minutes. 

With almost no strength you take your hands to your lower belly. There was nothing growing there, and, your soul chain has been broken. But nothing matters to you the most, than to disappoint Byakuya… you couldn't give him something he never knew he wanted but that he did so bad, and even worse, he was now suffering the loss of another woman in his life. 

You close your eyes, allowing a single tear to fall from the corner of your eye and wait there for the unstoppable call of death. 

But, he won't ever leave you. No. 

"Let's go. Mayuri surely knows how to fix this" he says, lifting your almost limp body up in his arms. 

"I'm sorry, Bya… I wanted to- I really wanted it to" you mumble, but his lips against your forehead are enough to understand he is holding his tears up and nothing, absolutely nothing matters the most to him than you. Byakuya is only focused on something; saving your life. 

"Now rest. The moment you get better, we are getting married. I can’t stand not calling you my wife. We will have plenty of time to have children. As many as you want" his only words before you passing away with a smile in your face. 

You aren't sure for how long you've been asleep. It doesn't matter, honestly. You are sure there is nothing else for a soul when it perishes, so, in any case the pristine blinding lights of the roof above you, are proof you aren't dead. 

The lights, the sounds and the man beside you sleeping over the white sheets of a hard mattress where you lie. 

"B… Bya…" you mourn, trying to touch his head. You notice your hand connected to some little tubes, but you don't care. The soft feeling of your lover's straight hair and his reiatsu is the only thing you wanna indulge in now. 

He wakes up, abruptly and scared. His delicate hand grabs yours, he smiles for the very first time in days, so genuinely and warmly. 

"You are back! Are you ok? You want- you want water?" He chimes, and it's inevitable for you not to remember the time when this happened to him and you were right by his side as he woke up. 

You giggle. There has been a light all during the darkness of your absence, and it has always been his, right next to you; like a sun in the middle of the night, like the shine of a firefly as you walked through a dark, dark forest. 

"Wha…t happened?" You ask, once he has given you water, drop by drop. 

He sighs, it clearly hurts him to answer that. "You've been poisoned, (Name). And it's been all in front of my eyes" he mumbles, turning around.

Byakuya is clearly embarrassed, and judging by the way his eyes abandoned yours, he feels like a failure to you. But you don't think he is one, nor even that he should feel ashamed. He has only protected you, saved you.

"Byakuya, my love… are we still getting married after all?" You ask, to show him how much you love him and that, even if you don't remember half the things that happened, that promise kept engraved in your mind. 

He turns around and soon he kneels in the ground. Kuchiki taicho's shihakusho flows like the first day you saw him; dramatically and stylishly as he is. 

"You still want me to be your husband?" He asks, surprised and yet so happy. 

"Of course, you can't go back now. Plus, you said we are having as many kids as I wanted, well… I want five… no! Six! you know to match the squad number!" You joke, enjoying Byakuya's eyes wide in terror. "Just kidding, one would be enough" you laugh, turning around to the side where he is. 

The captain breathes alleviated, and smiles kindly with eyes as sweet as candy. "I- yes… but, you aren't fully cured yet" he says, tucking a hair tuft behind your ear. "You should rest more, you were…" 

"Death. Technically death. Well, double death. Welcome back to life, (Name)-san ♡~" a sweet voice, playful and well known, chimes. 

Urahara Kisuke stands right by the foot of your bed, accompanied by Youruichi Shihoin, that strong woman who has given you little Byakuya's red cord. 

You blink twice, and laugh at your future husband's eye twitching when Yoruichi annoys him. "He saved you, (Name)! You are lucky Byakuya-bo has such a strong reiatsu!" 

What did he do? And why and how you've been poisoned? But, most importantly, why is there Urahara and Yoruichi san here? 

The slam of a door opening scares everyone off. "STOP ACTING LIKE THIS IS YOUR LABORATORY, URAHARA KISUKE!"  

Ah… Kurosutchi Mayuri. His peculiar voice, and the tiny kid now following him everywhere he goes that once used to be the vice captain of the twelfth squad, Nemuri. 

While Kisuke lifts his hands in the air, with a silly smile asking for forgiveness, the eccentric captain of the scientific division comes closer. 

"I, Kurotsuchi Mayuri have saved your life with my advanced techniques!" He says, lifting his index up in the air. 

"And I helped ~ " Urahara adds, stating how clearly he is the real genius. 

In any case, you don't care. You only care about being alive and able to grab Byakuya's hand who isn't letting you go for anything in the world. 

However, the doubt of who have poisoned you still remains. And, you need to ask. 

"I'm deeply grateful for saving my life" you voice, trying to sit in bed as Byakuya helps you with utmost care. "But… what exactly happened to me?" 

While the two geniuses fight for who is gonna explain it first, and Yoruichi laughs, Byakuya sits by your side in bed. He looks at you, fixing his night sky eyes on yours. "As I said, You've been poisoned… and the ones who did it, were… my own family…" he whispers, with tears forming on the corner of his eyes. 

You gasp; how comes they did that? How? And why?

"We have had several outbreaks in our labs, and, one of them had to do with an ex officer stealing one of my poisons. I was developing a new drug where the opponent would die by losing reiatsu slowly but surely" Mayuri explained, as Nemuri seemed to write something on a butterfly stamped notebook. 

"And, as a result of that drug, your chain of the soul had been altered in a way where the bridges of its components were unable to fix back into the original state. So, we used a technique where Kuchiki-san's spiritual pressure would replace the reiatsu you were losing as we tried to flush all the poison out of your system" Urahara adds, bowing Yoruichi who becomes blushed at such words. (You wish you knew why, but you can imagine) 

Both scientists and the beautiful cat woman leave with smiles on their faces. They know you two need some time, and much to Mayuri's regret, he understands his lab has now turned into some kind of love spot. 

You salute them; happy and thankful. But, it’s not over. You wait for Byakuya to explain when did someone use that poison on you. And so, you look at him. He knows you are waiting for an explanation, and, him as the honourable man he is gets ready to give it to you. 

"The elders have hired that same ex-officer to be our chauffer and servant. I was ignorant of such fact, and I should be blamed. There was another complicit to all of this… the 14th place of my own division who dated him; and her sister, our maid… you have eaten the poison at some point" he explains, ashamed. 

"The pancakes…" you mumble. The times where you have eaten those, were coincidental with every person. And now, you understand. 

Byakuya stands up. His hand finally lets go of yours and with a severe look he tells you; "Now I know exactly what it was. You have woken up, a day before the trial. I wanted to use Senbonzakura, but I knew you wouldn't allow it" 

You blink repeatedly, he knows you more than anyone else. 

"Nor Dokuhebi. Somehow, since we are scientifically bonded, as Urahara Kisuke said, Senbonzakura and her had been… uh- you know…" he stutters. But It's surely what you would have thought it would happen… Your Zanpakuto had fallen in love with Byakuya's. It makes you laugh; your lover's rosy cheeks makes everything better. 

"If you are feeling better, I can take you there tomorrow. I want them to look at you and plead for forgiveness. But, knowing you, I won't allow you to forgive them. They will pay" he finally states. Byakuya can't stand people hurting his pride, his family. 

You nod; to be fairly honest… you want them to pay too. "I want them to pay… but what is gonna happen with the elders… are you still…?" You dare to ask, feeling as guilty as possible. Wasn't for you becoming someone in his life, this would have never happened. 

Byakuya points at his kenseikan adorning his beautiful hair. "I'm still the head of the Kuchiki clan. And, my grandfather wasn't aware of all this. The moment he knew, he asked me to come see you whenever you are ready, and only if you want to. He wants to apologize" he says, looking at you with great pride in his eyes. 

You extend your hand to him. You don't want him to leave, you only want him to be close to you. And you suspect the feeling floats both ways. 

He grabs it once again, kissing, like a prince, the back of your hand. "I'm ashamed of wanting you to be part of the Kuchiki clan after this… but, help me be different" 

"You have always been different, Bya…"

…

The trial is about to start. You have never been in one, nor even imagine how they were celebrated. In any case, Byakuya told you that if you didn’t want to attend it would be ok. The allegations, and the evidence were clear. However, the Kuchiki clan was devastated, broken.

A great shame has been brought to the family, and Byakuya was the one suffering the most. You, still weak but surely feeling better, grip tight to his shihakusho sleeves. For the first time, Kuchiki-sama is being seen with a woman by his side, publicly and most importantly after Hisana passed.

Every influential member of the noble clans is there, and the gossiping didn’t take any time to start. You felt a thousand eyes scanning your face, looking at you as If you were some kind of rat that had been poisoned for being like a plague. But you don’t care, as long as the man you love was right by your side.

“Listen, if you wanna go back home you just have to tell me. I won’t be able to accompany you since I have to stay, but Rukia and Renji will be with you” he says, assuring you everything will be ok. You nod, and even if your legs keep shaking, you feel secure next to him. Is not that you are afraid of the nobles, but you don’t want to keep creating problems for your lover.

As you are about to sit, on a stone-cold seat, surrounded by people whose faces are covered by white panels and everything is dark around, you feel a hand on your shoulder.

“Dear, (Name)-san?” a man asks.

You turn around to discover Kuchiki Ginrei right behind you. You stand up, bowing immediately before him. Is not that you owe him any respect, but you couldn’t think of a better way of showing Byakuya how you really care about his family. Even so after what had happened.

“No need for you to bow, my dear. I should be the one doing it. Please, take a seat” the old version of Byakuya, with silver hair and a funny looking moustache, says. Byakuya immediately pulls you down, softly but surely. He isn’t allowing anyone to hurt you, not even his grandfather… not again, at least.

Ginrei then, sits right by your side. His hands take yours, but his eyes are on his grandson. He wants to show him he won’t do no harm to you. However, Byakuya has trouble trusting him yet.

“My dear, I won’t ask for you to forgive them. I won’t even ask for you to trust me. But please, trust my grandson. Byakuya will always protect you no matter what. You are welcomed into our family if you are willing to give us a chance, those who have hurt you have been permanently kicked out from our clan”

You smile at him. That man have spent centuries carrying a ton of noble bastards on his shoulders, taking care of young Byakuya when his parents passed away, helping, and making him the way he is now. You couldn’t blame him, you really couldn’t. “It’s all good, Ginrei-sama. I’m really thankful for this, and I trust in your grandson with my eyes closed” you whisper, quickly, as the judges begin hitting their gavels against the old wood of “justice”.

The servant, the one who looked at you with despise while took you to Byakuya’s inn, after the visit to the Rukon-gai, still does. By his side, your officer. She, who had blamed you of trying to steal Renji’s spot in the squad, of being a gold digger. And her sister, the one who brought you breakfast that morning where Byakuya and you understood how much both love the other.

You are surrounded by the top authorities of the clan, and those who have degraded you are now facing you next to simple servitude. Byakuya takes your hand, squeezing it. His palm feels sweaty, and despite his stare being as cold and with superiority air, you get he is more than nervous.

You look at him, and he looks back at you. A little curl in the corner of your lips, your eyes fixed on his, the complicit stare of two lovers that need no words to say infinite messages. And your message says he must be strong, he isn’t in the wrong and there is no man who could question him right now; Byakuya is the one who holds the power now, and you, too. You have the power, and his heart.  

The trial doesn’t take much. Ginrei and Byakuya stand before the noble clans to address the official expulsion of the members who tried to kill you. The jury accepts the request and as soon as that’s settle, the nobles, the servants and ex officers are indicted of their sentence.

You take a moment to look at them imitating Byakuya’s stare. You have for once understood why he insisted on it. You realized that it wasn’t simply because he thought he was better than the rest, but because if not he would have been perceived as weak. And weakness leads to what happened to you.

However, this time you weren’t there to show strength, but, how different from there you are. Because, indeed, Byakuya and you are better than any of them.

“Oh, how the tables have turned” you think, watching with a deadly smile at the bitch who claimed you were a whore. You turn to Byakuya, and with that same smile you place your head on his shoulder. “He is mine, bitch. He has always been mine ~”

It’s over. They are in jail now. Outside of the Gotei 13 now. Out of Byakuya’s home, too. “We should go back home, love” your lover whispers softly, as you walk outside that cold chamber like place, grabbing his arm.

“Are you sure?” you ask, seeing how an old, deteriorated Ginrei walks towards you to match your pace.

“He is coming too, he wants to give you something” Byakuya says, with a loving smile as both stop to wait for his grandfather.

All the way home both men have been silent. It isn’t rare, the actual captain of the six squad is as reserved and calmed -in public- as his predecessor. It’s even a little funny to you to imagine that maybe Byakuya will look exactly like him in a couple of decades. Though you are not really sure about the moustache.

As you finally arrive at the overly huge manor of the Kuchiki, you feel like something new was just starting to bloom. A new way of managing the noble house who is entitled to tell the story of the soul society is about to be born.

Tea is served in the winter garden, five cups. Rukia and Renji have arrived earlier and taking a sweet look at the last buds closing the cherry blossom season, they wait for you. You smile at Rukia, who will maybe become your sister-in-law sooner than later. She smiles back at you. If there is someone who you don’t want to let down, is her. You feel like a potential threat to the memory of her sister and that should be addressed with her sooner or later.

“Captain, I like your new haori!” Renji chimes, pointing at Byakuya’s new attire. The captain, a fashion victim, is always modifying his white distinctive to match the Kuchiki pride with great taste. He is now wearing more blue and less gold, with a little hint of pink here and there. Maybe it is meant to match with his cheeks when he notices Rukia smiling at how he is holding your hand.

You both quickly let go, with shame, remembering days before when your vice-captain and her girlfriend (you all know, by now) found you two during a passionate love making scene. You swallow, Byakuya does too. But he ultimately is the one to speak to break the ice.

“Thank you, Renji. You have developed good taste lately” Byakuya says taking a swift look at Rukia. He then moves your chair so that you can sit, imitating his vice-captain doing the same for his sister with now blushed cheeks. Before the women sit, however, you wait for Ginrei to sit.

You take a quick look at the cup of tea in front of you. Is not that you don’t trust Byakuya, but… last time you took breakfast, you were severely poisoned. And he notices.

Byakuya’s hand passes before your eyes, with a delicate motion like a dance of flowers he grabs your cup. “Don’t worry” he states, taking a little sip from it. “It’s been tasted by me, all of them”

You gasp, you want to protest. Why would he do that? Why? because he loves you, because he is there to protect you all.

The afternoon goes by with simple chatter, warm ambience but with the impossible goal of relaxing yourself. Is not that they make you feel nervous, but this is all different.

Ginrei enjoys the taste of cherry blossoms tea while taking soft looks at you and Byakuya. He remembers the way his grandson asked, plead, and begged for him to let him marry Hisana, and realizes that this time there is still a chance to make things different… that Byakuya deserves happiness, and all the love in this whole world.

“Dear (Name), I’d like to return something to you” the old man says all of the sudden, making you all shut up immediately. He stands up with difficulty, but Byakuya helps him.

Ginrei takes something out of his pocket and asks for you to lift your arm. You do, knowing too well what he will give you; Byakuya’s mother’s bracelet. And indeed, the rose gold finest chain rounds your wrist, as if it was made right for you.

“It is a pleasure to give you back what my grandson has given to you. He chose you, and you have all the right to have it. Byakuya-kun, I hope you could forgive this silly old man” he says, owning a smile from the man who once was a little kid of big blue eyes and short temper.

Rukia and Renji giggle in the back, they are so excited and happy.

You feel as if the bracelet would weight a ton. The responsibility of having it around your wrist is what’s heavy, but it shines so beautifully, like your lover’s eyes when he sees you smile. “The pleasure is mine, Ginrei-sama. I will take care of this treasure to honour your son and his wife, the ones who created the man I love with all my heart” you state, taking your eyes from the old man to Byakuya.

Your captain breathes. He was probably nervous, maybe he thought you wouldn’t accept it. But in reality, what has him troubled are the next few words he needs to pronounce…

He swallows and kneels right in front of you. Rukia squeaks. Renji bites his lips not to scream excited. And you feel like everything around you slowly disappears… Byakuya is kneeling right before you, with a little box in his hands…

“Uh- (Name)-san… I- now that I have my grandfather, sister and vice captain’s blessings… would you… marry me?”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ💖

[courtoftheold-fashionedloverboy]

Birthday -- Joel Miller

AN: first time posting my writing. I suck at writing and I wasn’t going to post this but it made me really happy so I hope it makes someone else happy even if it’s just one person.  This is completely self indulgent so I might have gotten things wrong especially since I’ve only seen the show. Feedback is welcome! Thank you. I was  also listening to “Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy” By Queen when I wrote this because that’s how Joel Miller makes me feel. I tried to write how I feel Joel talks, but I prolly botched it lol so I’m sorry

Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: little bit spoilers for episode 9, in the beginning. pure fluff and bad writing. Age difference implied. I did not give an age for the reader but I imagine she is in her 20's. Joel is in his 50’s like in the show/game. reader uses she/her pronouns but no physical description is given. Please let me know if I missed anything. Thank you. 

Summary: It’s your birthday and Ellie bakes you a cake and Joel gets you a gift.

Word count: 2,493

Today did not feel special, despite it being your birthday. Ever since the outbreak, it had only been about surviving. You never felt like celebrating your birthday, especially not when your family was gone. What was there to celebrate? 

You were currently in Jackson having stayed with Joel and Ellie after everything that had happened.You were sitting outside writing in your journal, writing about how dreadful today was. Ellie was inside or so you thought.

“When were you planning on telling us today is your birthday Y/N?” You turned over and noticed Ellie behind you. You quickly shut your journal. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to snoop.”

“I know you weren’t.” You sighed, “And I wasn’t planning on telling anyone that today is my birthday.”

“Why not?” Ellie asked as she sat down next to you.

“There’s nothing worth celebrating.”

“There is. We’ve managed to survive.”

“I know, it just doesn’t feel that way when my family is gone.”

“We’ve all lost someone, don’t you think the people you’ve lost, that we’ve lost would want us to find joy where we can in this world?”

You turned to face her. “Yeah, I think you’re right. You’re very wise for a kid you know?”

“I like to think I am, so, can we celebrate?” 

“Sure, but don’t tell a lot of people. I don’t like making a big deal.” 

“Does that include Joel?” 

“Uh sure, I guess, if he wants to celebrate with us.” 

“He’ll want to, don’t worry.” 

“How are you so sure?”

“I just know these kinds of things.” She got up. “I’ll leave you to your writing, I’ll come back for you when it’s time to celebrate.”

“Okay. What are you planning?”

“I just thought we’d go to the movies and maybe make something to eat together?” 

“That sounds good.” You replied. Little did you know Ellie was planning a small gathering. Ellie left and you continued to write, but instead of something bad or sad, it was something much happier. 

——

Ellie went to find Joel to let him know about Y/N’s birthday. She was hatching a plan to get them to admit their feelings for each other. “Hey, Joel?”

“Yeah?” 

“Did you know that today is Y/N’s birthday?” She asked.

“No. I didn’t. How’d you even find out?”

“I accidentally saw her writing about it in her journal. I asked her about it and and she said it was her birthday and she said she wasn’t planning on telling anyone. I convinced her to celebrate.”

“She never talked about her birthday in all the years I’ve known her. What do you need me for?”

“I need you to get her something.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s her birthday and she deserves something nice. Duh.” 

“And that’s all there is to it?” Joel asked, not quite believing that that was all.

“Yes.”

“I don’t believe you. What are you up to?”

“Nothing.” Joel gave Ellie a look. “Can’t you just get her something without questioning my motives?”

“No I can’t, not when I know you got somethin’ up your sleeve.”

“I’m not going to tell you. Just get her a gift.”

“Fine. What should I even get her?”

“I don’t know, something nice. Something that she’ll like.”

“Yes, because that narrows it down.”

“Well you’ve known her longer, so you figure it out.” 

“Gee, thanks for the help.”

“You’re welcome.” Ellie smiled brightly at him.

“And what are you gettin’ her or you ain’t tellin’ me that either?”

“If you must know, I’m baking her a cake.” 

“Good luck with that.”

“I don’t need luck. In fact, I’m a really good baker and it’s gonna be the best damn cake ever, so you better make your gift good.”

“Fine, now go. I gotta figure out what to get her.”

“Get it by 6, I’m throwing her a little surprise party at Maria and Tommy’s. Also if you see her don’t tell her about it.”

“I know how a surprise party works kid.”

“You’re also not good at shutting your mouth around her.”

‘What’s that s’posed to mean?”

“Oh, would you look at the time? I gotta go.”

“I get it, don’t tell me. See you later Ellie.”

“See you Joel!” She said and left

—

You were reading a book, when you felt someone tap your shoulder. You turned around. It was Ellie. “Hey Ellie, what’s up?”

“Maria sent me, she needs your help with something.”

“Okay, tell her I’ll be there in 10. By the way are we still going to the movies later?”

“Yes.” Ellie said and then left. You finished reading the page of the book you were on. Then you realized you looked like a mess, so you went to go change into something clean. It was also your birthday so you might as well try to look nice, especially if you were going to celebrate later with Ellie and maybe…with Joel. 

You went over to Maria’s and knocked on the door. No answer. You opened the door and entered. Maria and Tommy always said if they didn’t answer it was okay to come in. “Maria?” You called out. No answer.  You looked for her in the kitchen and the living room. No sign of anyone. Maybe she was out back, like she sometimes was. You decided to go to the backyard and see if she was there. 

You opened the door and immediately you heard. “Surprise!” You saw Maria, Tommy, their baby, and Ellie smiling at you. You didn’t see Joel and your heart sank, but you didn’t let it show. You smiled and gave each one of them a hug as they said “Happy Birthday” to you. 

“Thank you all. You didn’t have to do this.”

“When Ellie told us it was your birthday, we knew we had to do something. Even if we haven’t known each other long, we consider you family.” Tommy said. Tears filled your eyes.

“Thank you.” You looked to Ellie and said, “You were right. There is something worth celebrating. This family.” They all smushed you into a hug. After a minute they pulled away.

“I have a surprise!” Ellie shouted.

“What is it?” You asked.

“Maria and me made you a cake!”

“Thank you Ellie and Maria!” You said and Ellie went inside the house to go get it. 

Ellie entered the house and noticed Joel looking at you longingly through a window. “You know, staring at her like that won’t do you any favors.”

Joel turned around, “Huh?”

“Look, I know you have feelings for her, so when are you going to tell her?”

“How do you know?”

“Joel, you stare at her like an idiot every time she’s in your presence.”

“I didn’t know I was that obvious.”

“Well you are, so tell her.” Insisted Ellie.

“She’s not going to wanna  be with an old man like me.”

“Don’t you think that’s for her to decide? When you make up your mind tell her.” Ellie grabbed the cake and went to go back outside. Joel hesitated for a bit, but followed Ellie outside. He saw Y/N and immediately lost his breath.

You saw Ellie come out with the biggest smile on her face and an absolutely beautiful cake, covered in your favorite colors. Maria, Tommy and Ellie began singing “Happy Birthday”. You were so focused on everyone that you didn’t notice Joel come in behind Ellie until he joined in the singing. You heart skipped a beat when you locked eyes with him. You gave him a smile and he smiled back. After the singing was over, you cut the cake and handed everyone a slice. 

“This is delicious Ellie and Maria!” You said after tasting your first bite.

“You have Maria to thank for that. She helped me a lot.” Ellie said.

“I’m sure you would have done great regardless of my help. You’re pretty good at this.” Maria responded.

“I agree.” You said and you gave Ellie a hug. 

You finished your cake and excused yourself to go to the bathroom. When you came out, you saw Joel standing around in the living room. He turned around to look at you and he quietly said “Wow, you look beautiful.” 

“Thank you, Joel.” You decided to say, even though you knew he probably didn’t mean for you to hear it. He looked away, as if he was having trouble looking you in the eyes.

“You, uh weren’t s’posed to hear that.” 

You decided to tease him. “Does that mean you’re taking back what you said about me being beautiful?”

Something in him shifted and he decided to be bold. He looked at you. “No, I don’t wanna take it back because I mean it.”

“Do I still look beautiful even after a day of hard work? That’s when I feel the least beautiful.” You don’t know why you admitted that last part.

“You always look beautiful, even then.” You were suddenly feeling shy that the man you were in love with was calling you beautiful. You were silent for a while, neither of you knowing what to say. 

You spoke first. “I was starting to think you weren’t coming.”

“I was always meaning to come, just not late. The reason I was late was because I was trying to figure out what to get you for your birthday.”

“You didn’t have to get me anything, I appreciate you just being here. Your presence is the biggest gift I could get.”

“Ellie insisted I get you a gift, and I think it was a good idea.” He grabbed a leather bound journal from the couch and handed it to you. “It’s not much, but I know you love writing.” 

“Joel, I—I wouldn’t have cared if you got me a pen, or a card or nothing at all. This is perfect. Thank you. I love it. I love you.” You said those three words unintentionally but you were feeling so overwhelmed that they slipped out. He came closer to you. You looked down, hoping you didn’t just ruin everything.

“Hey, look at me.” Joel said as he lifted your chin. You stared at his beautiful brown eyes. “I was s’posed to say that first.” Your breath hitched. “I love you too, Y/N.”

“Really? You’re not just saying it out of pity?” 

“Look at the inscription in the journal.” 

You opened the journal and saw Joel’s familiar handwriting. The inscription said:

“Y/N, I know you’ll make good use of this journal. You write so beautifully and I hope you never stop writing. I also hope that you continue to share what you write with me. I want you to know that it brings me such joy to hear you tell me your stories and poems. I admit, I wish that you would write something about me in there. You have been such a bright light for me these past few years. You mean the world to me and I love you, so, so much. — Joel”

You had tears running down your face. “Don’t cry darlin’. I meant every single word.” He cupped your face and wiped the tears with his thumbs. His face was so close to yours. 

His gaze flicked to your lips. “I want you to kiss me, please Joel.” And he did. He kissed you softly, as if you were some delicate porcelain doll that would break if he kissed you too hard. You pulled away. “Joel, you can kiss me harder than that, I promise I won’t break.” He kissed you again. This time a little bit harder, and the kiss felt like it lasted for hours. 

You both pulled away and he put your foreheads together. “You don’t know how long I’ve been wanting to kiss you.”

“Me too.” You smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. He pulled you into an embrace as if he never wanted to let you go and so you said, “I’m not going away. Ever.”

“I know and I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

“Finally!” You both turned to the voice and saw Ellie.

“How long have you been standin’ there?” Joel asked.

“Long enough to know my plan worked. Do you know how hard it was to get you two together?”

“I knew you were up to somethin’.”

“But you can’t be mad can you Joel?”

“I guess not. Thank you for the nudge.”

“Nudge? I’m offended, that was a push. You wouldn’t be here kissing if I didn’t do something. You two are such lovesick puppies it hurts.” Joel rolled his eyes. 

“Thank you Ellie, for the push. We were being idiots this whole time.” You said

“Yes you were but I’m happy for the both of you.”

“C’mere kid.” Joel said to Ellie and he gave her a hug, that you joined in as well. 

After a while Ellie said, “All right, lovebirds. Time to go back outside.”

“Fine.” Joel grabbed your hand. “Let’s go darlin’.” 

“Can you give me one last kiss?” You asked.

He gave you a short kiss. You pouted and he said, “If I gave you anymore, we’re not going back outside.”

“Ew, get a room! Or at least wait until I’m not here.” Ellie said. You and Joel both rolled your eyes. 

“We love you too Ellie.” You said. 

“Yeah, yeah. I love you both, now let’s go outside.” You followed her outside with Joel’s hand in yours, something that didn’t go unnoticed by Maria and Tommy.

“Finally.” Said Tommy. “You both were such idiots.”

“Yeah, we know Tommy.” Joel said.

“I’m happy for you brother. I really am. You deserve to be happy.” Tommy gave Joel a hug. He then gave you one. “Y/N you’re a keeper. Now be sure to keep him in his place.” 

“I heard that.” Joel said.

“Don’t worry I will.” You replied smiling.

Maria also hugged the both of you. “I’m happy for both of you.”

“Can we dance now?” Ellie asked.

“Of course. Play whatever you want Ellie. The box of records are over by the record player.” Maria said.

A familiar old love song started to play. “Of course Ellie chose a love song.” Joel said.

“Care to dance?” You asked and held out your arm.

Joel kissed your hand. “I’ll always dance with you, sweetheart.” You smiled and put your arms around his neck. He put his hands on your waist and you danced to the music.

You two were in your own little world, smiling like the love sick puppies you were. “I have something to tell you.” You said to Joel.

“What is it?” 

“The poems I’ve shared with you weren’t about an old love like I said, they’re about you. I just never had the guts to tell you.”

“I think that deserves a kiss.” Joel said and he kissed you.

“More dancing, less kissing!” Ellie shouted. You both laughed. You danced the night away with the love of your life and your found family. This is the life you searched for and you finally got it.