#it’s like our leading newspaper lmao

[sapphia]

honestly, fuck reddit. l ready can’t download pictures from there without making them ugly, their links are impossible to link to without linking through reddit, and now a third of their userbase and subs dropped out or lost quality because of their own shitty decisions. like, yeah i’m still there because without that the only social media i use will be tumblr, and i don’t think that’s healthy for anyone. but honestly if it dies, it deserves it.

[oillipheist9000]

Heyy

So, this is mostly just a fun timeline I made with little research backing it, but I thought it might be cool to share?

It goes through what historical events happened throughout Alastor’s life that might have impacted him and sets the stage for what his life might have looked like. It does hinge quite a bit on US history, so I will also touch on parts of that for our friends who aren’t from the US and don’t know : D

Now keep in mind that this is more of just a list of fun facts that i’ve shoved into a readable outline, than anything put together lol.

Alastor is said to be in his 30’s or 40’s when he died in 1933, this puts his year of birth at a rough range of 1890-1900. For the purpose of this timeline, I will be assuming that Alastor was born in the year 1902 because I want to. This would make him 31 at the time of his death.

In 1892, the supreme court ruled on Plessy vs Ferguson, which was what established the idea of ‘Separate but Equal’ <- (i'm assuming people know what that is and stuff, if you don’t know, feel free to ask, I can give more of a history lesson)

From 1900-1909, education past the 5th grade did not EXIST in New Orleans for black children. This is a large part of why I believe a birth year of at least 1900 would be more accurate for Alastor, as he would have been 7-9 (2nd-4th) when middle school (6th-8th) became available to him.

In 1917, McDonogh No. 35 High School became the first public high school for black teens. Alastor would have been 15 in my timeline. This means that he would have likely been out of school for a year under the assumption that he wouldn’t be able to go anymore. (There were a couple private schools, but those were Expensive!!)

1920: KKK reemerged in Louisiana <- (again, assuming people know the history on this, if you would like a quick history lesson, lmk!!)

In 1921, Alastor graduated! Yay!! He is now 19!

Now, a fun fact! Throughout all of this, radio has not existed as a Thing in New Orleans. Alastor would not have grown up listening to the radio. It would have been new tech for him!!

In 1922, the first radio station came to New Orleans!!! It’s called WWL and it runs … drumroll please … ADS!!! In an attempt to raise funds for Loyola University! Exciting, right? : D

By 1927, the Federal Radio Commission was established in an effort to help organize airwaves, which had become messy and disorganized from the abundance of unlicensed, random people broadcasting.

1933: Alastor dies D:

Also 1933, oddly enough, A newspaper somehow managed to get radio stations in New Orleans legally banned from airing news from the last 24 hours?????

An interesting note. This ban went through in the summer. Deer season is in the winter (Dec-Jan), so it was either banned 6 months before or 6 months after Alastor’s death

1934: FRC is replaced by the Federal Communications Commission

This is pretty much all I have. I also am including some of the links to sources that I thought were interesting. Super open to discussions and questions lol. Hope someone enjoyed reading all this lmao

And also @nunalastor cause you seemed interested and I finally got everything together lol

[glorified-red]

oooo a 5k? Are you a student athlete?is that how you got a full ride?

Yes, but no, but yes, but no.

I've been an althete for my entire school career up until my senior year of highschool, so I guess? Student Athlete?

For a year or so I was a gymnast. (My sister and I did it together, she stayed her entire life, I did not, obviously)

Then for a few years I played T-Ball (recently found out via my mom that I made the front page of the city newspaper because I hit the ball and then felt really bad so I went to go pick it up instead of like....playing the game).

Then I played soccer for, so many years, I couldn't tell you how many, I lost count. (I was offense most of the time, rip my ankles)

I almost did volleyball but chickened out last minute (wouldve been a setter or libero).

Then, being the band kid I was, I joined marching band my freshman year. (ah seven years of playing an instrument leads to this)

Got bored of that so I switched to colorguard for two years which was soooo much more athletically demanding my GAWD. (two years of ✨trauma✨ but I might buy a sabre soon, idk, feeling kinda silly)

And Senior year I did nothing and got a job to fill the void of having way too much freetime for me to know what to do with. How do you guys not do sports? What do you do with all the free time???

So yes, I was a "student athlete," kinda sorta, not really, but sure. If I kept playing I probably could've gotten a music scholarship but I haven't touched that instrument in almost 3 years. Same with maybe a marching band scholarship? Idk if my college does that tbh.

But how I actually got my scholarships? Tests and Parents pfft.

5.2 + 3.98 GPA (dont ask why its not a 4.0, I will literally start crying, went my ENTIRE LIFE with a 4.0 only for the lAsT sEmEsTer of SENIOR YEAR---full disrespect: fuck college Spanish), straight A's MINUS ONE CLASS (if I could fist fight college spanish I so would).

I was a dual enrollment kid so I was half a highschool student and half a college student, shot my GPA through the roof and got me to graduate with my AA the same year I graduated highschool. I was the Jason Todd, loved school, was great at school, never struggled, never studied, etc etc.

SAT scores and ACT scores got me a 75% scholarship to any college I wanted to go to in the area (I was only a few points away from 100% but I was too lazy to try again lmao). Then I got another scholarship for being a military brat. Then I got another one for having parents with post-military issues where I basically get paid to go to school. All of that just combines to a full ride, plus any extra money from the scholarships goes to me which is more than I need so it's in my savings acct.

First two years of college were completely free because I was in the dual enrollment program (free college woo), next three years are free because of multiple scholarships, I just say full ride cuz it's quicker to say and gets the point across.

As for the 5ks: My mom and I like to do them together and do at least one a month. This month we're doing an obstacle 5k where you physically cannot complete it without a buddy or a group. Army crawling under electricity, balancing on things by countering each others weight, ninja warrior wall where your team is at the top to catch you, etc etc.

My family (found moreso than blood) is going as Justice League members because there were too many of us to be the Power Rangers. We're doing another one of these in Dec. and then the 10k version of it next year and then hopefully the 15k version. I know my mom and I want to eventually do a marathon.

My main goal is to complete a triathalon. I've ALWAYS wanted to do one so we're gonna try to do it sometime late next year. Starting with the shorter triathalons and slowly working our way up to the more average/long ones.

Now don't get it twisted, I'm not like, a runner or workout junky. Quite literally the opposite. My mom is a runner and its her therapy. Mine? Meeting new people, getting some sun, getting the body moving, and maybe getting some nice scenary. I do run parts of the races, but for the most part I like a nice brisk walk since its healthier for my body than running (yay chronic pain and stupid ovaries!)

I hate the stereotype that you have to run the whole thing or be super fit to do marathons and races. No?? Anyone who wants to can. The point for me isn't to win or to place, its just to finish and have fun. Do I enjoy having a good time? Hell yea, I beat my time by 10 minutes last solo 5k I did. But I'm also the first person who will happily sacrifice a good time so I can enjoy meeting other racers and walking with them.

The last 5k I did was a forest one (it fucking sucked) where the terrain was sand and there were soooo many branches and hills. I watched a racer sprain their ankle right in front of me so we ended up walking the rest together and I carried them for some bits. So my time was terrible, but hey, I got to meet someone I never would've if I didn't stop---and that's more valuable to me.

[patrywoso]

(Heads up this is long so get comfy)

Hey lovely girl, for starters if you would like to take a break, go ahead! It’s your life and you decide how to live it :) me and the other anons will be here when you return! (Do let us know beforehand though I’m still recovering from the near heart attack I had when I found out u were in the hospital) if you would like, I can try and request more stuff but I’m afraid I only like quite a small group of people haha and my taste is kinda bad.

Hope your dad gets discharged soon darling and you can both enjoy the countryside together. If not, I do hope that you at least take some time off to recharge yourself!

I’m gonna be honest with you the study method varies by the subject and what’s being tested. There are certain ones where I do something very unhealthy called procrastinating. Basically I attempt to cramp all the information into my brain in under 24hs. Is it detrimental to my health? Yes physically and mentally. Does it work? Unfortunately so.

But a more healthy method which I rarely use is to write out everything you need to know and space out the topics each day leading up to your exam. For organisation, I use notion! I find it easier to spend some time at the start of my course to create a notion page that can keep track of all my assignments, exams and any due dates I might have. It’s also helpful as I can link the list of topics tested and see what needs to be done clearly. Additionally, when listing out the topics, I make sure to also indicate how confident I am in doing it/ remembering it while also highlighting which topics seem to be harder than the others. From there I pick what to prioritise and try to space out my study schedule evenly to ensure that I’m not studying hard topics everyday back to back cause I would literally kill myself. I’ve also found it helpful to reindicate my confidence level in the topic after revising it to see if I should take a final glance at it the night before my exam! This is for subjects/exams that require a large amount of topics or information.

Another thing I learnt off one of my classmates back when I was younger was to study smart. Make friends with people in your class, share notes, don’t be afraid to ask for help from the professors and consult them regularly! Additionally, I’ve found that everyone studies differently so what works for me might not work for you! Do take what I’m about to say with a grain of salt.

For starters, none of my study plans really worked in the beginning, so I had to invent my own. Basically, I really enjoy talking/ telling stories so I treated my content heavy subjects as like a giant talking session. I would either talk to my friends and go through the content with them, basically teaching them or I would literally just pretend I’m tutoring my siblings on what I’m studying. Additionally, treating it like a giant gossip session allows me to simplify content into memes or stories that I understand. When I used to study history, I just treated myself as like a newspaper girl spreading the latest gossip in the square lmao. It might not work for u tho but do give it a go!

This is getting kind of long but I do hope it’s helpful to you cause literally no one online helped me for years so I built all this myself haha.

For some methods that have worked on my friends but not me,

They would buy/ use whiteboards to regurgitate all the information they needed to know and draw like huge Mindmaps. This is kinda like my gossip tea spilling method except it’s silent and you look less batshit crazy doing it yourself.

One of my friends just bought notes off our really smart classmate and memorised it. Sometimes u can find free notes online/ for a discounted price so if ur short on notes start there.

My friends and I also use different study apps that lock away distraction apps on ur phone (social media etc) and u can start a timer to see how long u can study in a day. General thoughts on this is that it really isn’t for everyone. It caused me to severely neglect my health as I felt peer pressured to be studying whenever they were studying thus resulting in me not taking breaks. I called it quotes after I pushed myself to study through a fever until I actually started hallucinating my work.

These work for memorisation courses but if for whatever reason your doing things like Math (why??? This subject can burn in hell) you just need to practice. Like learn the formulas then just spend the rest of your time practicing cause this bloody subject isn’t something u can memorise. Hence it does not work well with my procrastination.

Okay this is bloody long, let me know if there’s anything else you would like to know! I’m free to answer any study related questions haha. If u do go back for your masters, that’s great! Cause we should keep on learning. But do remember to take care of yourself in the process and take breaks when necessary. You’re doing great, and that you made it so far you can complete it. Take care, love you xoxo.

Thank you so much sweetheart, i didn't mind a bit it was long cause i found it really interested to know what you do and they way you explain it and i really appreciate it so much, i have the ideas wrote down on my notebook and i will try to kind of practice them with some work related things to see how i feel and if they can help. Thank you so much for taking the time to send it you're the best.

You can always send ideas or anything, you're really good at It so if you have one you want to send do it 😊

I don't think i'm taking a break but if i do i will let you know i promise.

Hope you're having a wonderful day, love you

[reikunrei]

I told you I was attacking your inbox >:)

Okay so like you I fully believe that El and Vecna were both present with Will in the UD, albeit in varying ways

I'm literally thinking this as I'm typing this (plz bare with me by brain worms are cuput rn) but what if it's a different Henry an El? Or maybe it's the same Henry but it's an El that took Henry up on his offer and grew to resent that decision, leading her to helping Will. When you think about timelines and all that,,,it's possible. It also coincides with your theory about El from a different timeline. Back to the lights, kinda

Okay I do think that Will has some powers, like you said yourself, but it makes me think that maybe Alternate Timeline El would've had something to do with that...somehow. Like choosing him to right her wrongs. Will and modern El are close and that's worth a note. Also modern El somehow knew who Will was before seeing him? Makes me think timeline fuckery

Your lights theories have lead me down this rabbit hole, thank you.

The difference with the lights and how they act and the purpose they serve does make you think of a push-pull going on the UD...Henry and Alternate timeline El.

I want to say more but my brain is so mush I'm sorry, but Wilbur your lights post is 100% phenomenal. You picked up on something I haven't seen anyone else pay attention too- it amazes me

I completely forgot about the fact that El recognized Will!! I meant to put that in the post but I think I just glazed over and forgot to put it in lmao. but for real!! why does she know his face!! makes me think that either future El or alt timeline El spoke with our young El and either showed her or pointed Will out to her to know he’s the one that “swapped” with her, so to speak. or potentially in some twist of events, Will ends up in the lab and she sees him there, even just a glimpse. lots of possibilities with that!

there’s also definitely a lot of fuckery wrt the different kinds of El’s and “Henry’s” that we get. I for one do not think that our Vecna that we see is Henry. it’s possibly that at least some of the 001 that we see is Henry, but I believe that Vecna is the Edward we see mentioned in the newspaper about the Creel murders (it’s blurry but it’s there! I saw it with my own two eyeballs in the actual show!). and you know I love the idea of there being some timeline where El does decide to work with 001 or Vecna, where they both work together to change the world or whatever. Evil Eleven, if you will. it’s definitely worth considering at the very least, bc it is a fun idea!! especially since it wouldn’t be a stretch to picture El agreeing with Vecna and 001 about their qualms with society and the world. she’s been mistreated in it too, after all!

there is just so much going on with it, and this is all just from the lights and some basic context, so I don’t even want to begin to imagine how my brain will start leaking out of my ears when/if I decide to delve further into any one theory or in a general search for more evidence. it’s all wacky!!!!

thank you for reading my essay about blinking lights and thank you for your input sam!!! I always love hearing your ideas hehe

[slttygeto]

exploring a haunted place!

request: [anon] exploring paranormal activity in a haunted house with jjk men? :) ( Heavily inspired by the buzzfeed series LMAO )

featuring: gojo satoru, geto suguru.

genre: crack.

c.w: mention of dead bodies and ghosts (duh), suguru is kinda mean 😭 mention of hospital.

—gojo satoru

he's not scared. like at all.

idk how to explain but hes down for anything as long as it involves being with you

he's a little shit tho he will literally move stuff and pretend like the 'ghost' moved it.

he will say shit that will most likely get his ass possessed or haunted one day😭

"how come ghosts are always from the 1700s?" gojo grumbled as he made his way inside the house, you gripping his shirt from behind as you kept your flashlight close to your face, almost as if it was going to protect you.

"I don't know but I already don't like this." you mumbled back to your boyfriend, wary of the way the house already looked terrifying with clothes scattered around, dusty furniture and broken windows. this was a bad idea.

"I want a ghost from 2007 to haunt me, we'll sing Britney Spears together—hey what if this ghost is actually from the early 2000s? should I blast Baby One More Time?" why was he having so much fun while you were practically dying over here?

you glared at him as he pulled out his phone and opened Spotify, the tune of said song started playing out loud as he skipped his way towards the kitchen since it was the first room that greeted you two.

"c'mon ghost, I know you like some tunes around here, right pal? I was gonna say man but I would be assuming your gender and that's mad disrespectful," you sighed at how your boyfriend was so chill, looking around the kitchen and searching for clues of who once lived here. you found nothing, only old newspaper from a long time ago along with ripped books. what a waste.

"hey let's do something," satoru grinned at you, placing the flashlight he had on the counter before staring at you who was looking at him suspiciously.

"we'll ask the ghost to do something to see if they're actually here."

"satoru, you're crazy."

"I'm just making sure this ghost is not an actual coward." how did he not get his ass possessed?

standing next to you, your tall boyfriend lazily rested his arm around shoulders before speaking loudly and clearly.

"if you don't want us to be here, turn this flashlight on."

"satoru what the fuck—"

the flashlight turned on. you were screwed, absolutely and clearly fucked.

"nope."

"hey they said something!"

"I AM LEAVING"

—geto suguru

why is he even there

he is unfazed by everything

a ghost could literally appear in front of him and he would still be like wassup ghost how is life then be like oh right you're dead lol

like satoru, how did he not get his ass kicked by a ghost already

"this actually looks like a pretty terrifying place," you knew suguru was being sarcastic. he always was when it came to stuff like this and you were starting to regret coming to this haunted hospital with him.

"it is supposed to be terrifying, they used to transport dead bodies down to the... basement or whatever that place is," you said followed by a shiver, pointing your flashlight to the random writings that were scribbled on the walls that lead down to the place that made you the most creeped out about this hospital.

"talk about first class treatment," you could see suguru's smirk without having to face him, a huff leaving your lips at how he was so calm compared to you.

"hey I have an idea." first time suguru suggested to do something while you two went out on something like this and you were starting to hate it.

"you said they used to transport dead bodies down there right?"

"right."

"so we don't know what's down there, right?"

"..right."

"and that actually stretches out for a long distance, right?" he had a grin on his face, you were getting nervous.

"...suguru what is it?"

"what if you go down there and I stay right here and we both turn our flashlights on and we'll see if we can see each other?"

a moment of silence passed with you just staring at him with a blank expression, one he couldn't read but made him hold back a laugh for some reason.

"what if you go fuck yourself, how about that?"

well, he sure wasn't expecting that with how he bursted out laughing, pulling you towards him with a hug.

"don't be so scared! I'm sure it's not that long of a distance,"

"you're sacrificing me!"

"what if we were in a zombie apocalypse, you wouldn't sacrifice me?"

"no?!"

suguru sure didn't share the same opinions as you when it comes to stuff like that.

2022 © all works belong to slttygeto. do not repost my work anywhere else.

[inkdemonapologist]

HI THOUGHTS ON THE NEW TRAILER (if you've seen it - or if you're going in blind, ARE YOU EXITED)?

GOSH i have… CONFLICTED FEELINGS!

First, briefly, elephant in the room: I don’t really support JDS the real life company. No judgement to those that are excited to get the game, you know, no ethical consumption under capitalism and all that and we all gotta just make our own choices about where we draw our own lines. But just for me, I… personally don’t feel good about the idea of, deciding all their weird behaviour and mistreatment and unprofessionalism is fine in the end as long as the trailer looks cool. I’m intrigued by where BATDR will go, and it’s apparent the folks that worked on it put a lot of love into it. It’s possible I’ll change my mind; maybe as time passes it’ll become clear that they’ve cleaned up their act (though that one staff member’s passive-aggressive reactions to the last controversy video are uh, not promising). Or maybe someone will finally speak on this, say that the backlash to all their earlier bullshittery was a wake-up call, and they took steps to get their shit together so it would never happen again, but they didn’t want to address it publicly until they had a game in hand to regain the community’s good will. That would make sense. I don’t really expect this to happen, though, so I am not planning to buy/play/stream the game for now.

But, you know, I never played the original BatIM, either, and that didn’t stop me from being totally obsessed. So setting my misgivings about the actual company aside: THE TRAILER

I LOVE…. SON BOY BENDY…. IM SO HAPPY HES CUTE… I can’t believe Bendy is actually going to be in a Bendy game. This is hands down the thing I am the most giddy about. ALSO I KNEW HE WAS GONNA BE IN THE VERY END OF THE TRAILER I KNEW IT

It’s really encouraging to see them teasing new characters and new story and new circumstances, rather than leaning on Established Old Favs for hype… feels like there’s really a new story to tell here, with big changes in the status quo of the studio, rather than just trying to make More Of BatIM?????, which is great to see. It looks potentially really cool for fans of the original game.

“Beware the ink demon” “What’s an ink demon?” is actually great

At the same time… I have this feeling that I'm not the target audience. Like, it looks potentially way better than I expected, but those good choices ultimately lead further away from the stuff that interests me most (the pre-ink studio). The inky studio is interesting to me as a consequence of JDS, as a vehicle through which to discover what went wrong in the real world… and from what we’ve seen in the trailer, we’ve kinda moved beyond that in BatDR. I think that’s a smart creative decision that bodes well for the game, while also being not quite what I’m looking for. It’s a strange feeling! I'm not EXCITED like many of my fandom friends, but I am intrigued and interested.

(while proofreading this answer this morning in order to post it, the JDS Press Archive updated on the website with the first newspaper clipping and IM IMMEDIATELY FEELING WAY MORE DELIGHTED.... the trailer is fine BUT APPARENTLY WHAT I REALLY WANT IS MORE NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS LMAO)

I usually find comparisons of BatIM to Bioshock sort of reductive (like….other horror games have audiologs….BatIM doesn’t have plasmids or anything like the Big Daddies/Little Sisters or a Would You Kindly Twist or Critiques of Objectivism or ANY OF THE BIG ICONIC THINGS so like, the inspiration is clear but I really don't think it's Just Trying To Be Bioshock) but BOY HOWDY DOES BATDR SEEM TO BE TURNING THE BIOSHOCK VIBES UP TO 11 LMAO. thats not a complaint it just SURE IS THAT

One of the things I find a shame in batim proper is how quickly it stops being an animation studio with a weird cult around its main character. By chapter 3 it’s all SO mechanical like some kinda nonsensical factory… and this beautiful sprawling world in BatDR looks really cool, with a design that's filled with love and care!! but is also less and less an animation studio where something went wrong. Again, conflicted feelings!!

OBVIOUSLY if Sammy appears in the game for more than a cameo I AM REALLY CURIOUS what all of this has done to him. Is he dead? Is he still in Chapter 5 mode and incoherent? Is he able to find a new purpose in a world that’s supposedly free of the Demon? Or is he a “demon follower” who’s gone into hiding since his god was (allegedly) murdered? BECAUSE THAT LAST ONE COULD MAKE HIM QUITE AN IMPORTANT ANTAGONIST ACTUALLY,

(this is getting into wild speculation territory but i would ALSO be down for Sammy having immediately attached himself to this wilson fellow. Just keep up the trend of putting your total faith in the least trustworthy people Mr Lawrence!!!)

Like every other girl-liker on the planet i am also delighted about malice with gun

The lost one is cool-looking

I immediately want to know more about the implied DOCUMENTARY ABOUT JOEY DREWS LIFE???????

[jakesguitarstring]

where this all leads || dr. j.m.k 

{part two}

summary: working for dr. j.m.k and having a crush on him has never been easy, but it gets even harder on a trip to a conference. 

words: 4.7k (this one got away from me a little bit lmao) 

warnings: pure smut (18+ minors dni!), masturbation, unprotected sex (always wear a condom folks!) 

masterlist 

taglist: ahhh i love all of you so much  @ageofflowerpower @theweightofstardust @mywaysooon @bumblebeeswrite @franciskiszka @dazzlinghazeaboutyouu (please message me to be added)

“Thank you for calling the office of Dr. J.M.K. How may I direct your call?” You answered the phone with a practiced calming tone. It was second nature by now, having worked for the good doctor for several years. Almost four years ago, you'd answered a newspaper ad for a receptionist position for a therapist. You could remember the day like it was yesterday, walking into a cramped office full of unpacked boxes and yelling if anyone was there. A curly-haired man came stumbling out of a back room, disheveled, and he’d told you that the office wasn’t open yet. You’d told him that you were there for an interview for the receptionist position. He smiled and offered you the job and asked if you could start at that moment. You shrugged your shoulders and set your bag and resume that he never looked at down and got started helping him unpack and decorate the office. The two of you had worked side by side together since that day, as the business grew and he gained traction and numerous clients. Two years ago he had promoted you to his second in command and gave you the title of Deputy Executive Director, you assisted him in picking a new larger office space and designed it. You also helped him expand the business, hiring two other therapists and another part-time receptionist, so you could focus on other duties for part of your workday. 

You hung up the phone after helping the potential new client as Dr. J.M.K came out of his office with his final client for the night. He took her hands into his and gave her his classic goodbye. “Thank you so much for your time. May you continue our work together. And I will see you next week.” Once she left and he locked the door, he turned his attention to you. 

“Are we all set for the conference?” He asked as he walked over to your desk. He grabbed one of the mints out of the bowl on top of the desk and unwrapped it and popped it into his mouth. 

You pulled the bowl off the desk. “Those are for the patients.” You smiled and he returned the smile. “But yes, I’m all set to go. I sent you the itinerary and the car is all packed up. Ready whenever you are.” His smile brightened, highlighting the tiny little gap between his front teeth and causing your heart to flutter. You looked away to ignore the way his smile warmed your entire body. 

“Let me go grab my bag. I’ll meet you in the car.” 

Two hours later the two of you were halfway to the city where the conference was. The doctor was going to be a keynote speaker, speaking about one of his more controversial ideas on spiritual sexuality. “Are you nervous?” You asked, watching a raindrop make a trail down the windshield. He laughed. 

“No. I don’t get nervous.” 

“That’s a lie and you know it, Josh.” 

“I never lie.” You laughed and threw your head back on the headrest. “I didn’t know I was such a comedian.” 

“No, you’re just stupid.” The smile he gave you made you blush and you were grateful that it was dark enough that he couldn’t see your reddening cheeks. He opened his mouth to say something, but a sound coming from the engine stopped him. “What was that?” The sputtering continued and then the car slowly came to a stop as he pulled it off to the side of the road. 

“Well, that’s not good.” He muttered. 

“Yeah, no shit.” You both climbed out of the car and he popped the hood. It looked completely normal to you, so you turned to him and he shrugged. 

“I have absolutely no idea.” 

“Oh, that’s great.” 

“I saw a motel just down the road. Why don’t we head there to get out of the rain and I’ll call a mechanic or something.” You shrugged. He grabbed his bag and yours. When you reached for yours he shook his head. “I can carry it.” 

The clerk at the desk of the motel was scrolling through their phone and didn’t even look up when you entered. Josh cleared his throat and they looked up with an eye roll. “Welcome to The Highway Motel. How can I help you?” 

“Hi. Our car broke down just down the road and we need two rooms please.” Josh explained. 

“We only have one room left.” 

“Alright! I guess we’ll take it!” He exclaimed before you could reply. You pulled on his arm and he looked over at you. 

“Josh.” You whispered, anxiety coursing through your body. 

“It’s okay.” He gave you a calming smile then stepped up to the counter to finish checking in with the clerk. They handed him the key and he guided you out to the motel room. “The clerk also gave me a number for a mechanic. They don’t open until the morning though. So we’re stuck here until then. I’ll call the conference and tell them what happened. I don’t speak until the evening, so it shouldn’t be a big deal. It’s all good.” He could sense your nervous energy. 

“If you say so.” You sighed. He unlocked the door and pushed it open. You walked in. “Oh,” you said. 

“What?” Josh asked as he stepped in behind you. “Oh.” He repeated. There was only one bed. “I’ll take the couch.” 

“I’m taking a shower.” You felt completely overwhelmed. And just wanted to be alone to calm down. After a long shower, your hair dripped onto your bare shoulder as you threw on a t-shirt and some old sweatpants. You took a deep breath before opening the door into your shared room with your boss. He was reclining on the couch, although calling it a couch was being nice, it was more of a loveseat and, despite his shorter stature, his feet were dangling off the edge. While you were in the shower he had changed into a pair of gray sweatpants but remained in his favorite white long sleeve shirt. He looked up as you stepped out of the bathroom. 

“Enjoy your shower?” He gave you a soft closed-lip smile. You nodded and quickly rushed to the bed, feeling somewhat exposed in your pajamas. You pulled the comforter and sheet up and slid into the surprisingly comfortable and soft bed. “I called the organizer of the conference and they’re fine. As long as we’re there by about noon.” You nodded again and bent your legs to bring your knees up and rested your chin on them. He set his book down and sat up to look at you. “Are you okay?” 

“Yeah, I’m fine. I was just stressed out.” 

“Did you try those breathing exercises I told you about?” He asked. 

“Uhh, I…” 

He chuckled and slid his glasses up to rest on top of his curly hair. “Do you believe in my work?” Your jaw dropped, but you were silent, having no idea how to respond to that question. He sighed and ran his hands over his face and to the back of his neck to rub it. “Sorry. I didn’t mean it to be accusatory. Of course, you believe in it. You’ve stuck around this long. It’s just…” he stopped and shook his head. 

“You can tell me.” You whispered, not confident that you could speak any louder. 

“I just don’t know if I’m doing the right thing anymore. The business is growing exponentially.” He waved his hands to accent his point. “But I feel like I’m missing something. Years ago when I started this, all I wanted was to help people. I want people to feel good about themselves. And to learn to make other people feel good. Now it’s so businessy. Like I go to these conferences or I publish books or articles in academic journals. All this that I’m supposed to do. But it isn’t what I want to do.” 

You were quiet as you let his words settle between you. “What do you want?” You finally asked. 

He took a deep breath and then let it out. “I don’t want to be this expert in my field or whatever they call it. It’s annoying anyway.” His hands made a motion as if he was physically pushing the moniker away from him. “I just want to connect with people. I want everyone who crosses my path to learn something. I see so many people in my life that I could help, but I don’t even have the time because of all the idiotic parts of owning a business.” 

“Who would you help?” 

“Is it too much to say everyone in the world?” He grimaced. You laughed. 

“Maybe start smaller.” You suggested. 

“I could help you.” 

“What?” 

“Can I ask you a question?” 

“I guess.” 

He smirked. “When was the last time you connected with your inner feminine divine?” 

You coughed, taken aback by the question “I’m sorry. I don’t think I know what you mean.” 

“How long have we worked together?” 

“About four years.” 

“And have you ever used spirituality to improve your sexual experiences?” 

You blinked. He watched you. He was being serious. You shook your head. “And yet you said you believed in my work?” He clasped his hands in front of him and set his elbows on his knees and then rested his chin on his clasped fists. He studied you while you tried to come up with an answer. When nothing came to mind, he spoke instead. “Does my work make you uncomfortable?” 

“No! No! Of course not!” You yelped. “I suppose, I just don’t really understand it. I worry about the business side of it all. I figure you take care of the spiritual and I’ll make sure the bills are paid. The sex stuff isn’t important to me.” You shrugged. 

“Sex isn’t important to you?” He inquired with a lift of his brows as if it was the most ridiculous statement he’d ever heard in his life. 

“That’s not what I said, Josh! Your sex stuff isn’t my top priority. I get on just fine on my own, thank you very much.” 

“So you’ve found a person who worships you then?” 

“What?” 

“You need, no deserve, someone who will worship the goddess within you. Someone who’s only desire is to make you feel desired. And to make absolutely certain that you…” 

“Cum.” 

His chuckle was low and deep and thrummed through your body. “Yes. If you want it bluntly.” He rubbed his chin in thought. "Have you ever experienced a spiritual orgasm?” 

You gasped. “Josh!” He could absolutely see the blush rising from your chest. Your cheeks felt as though they were on fire. You knew this was wildly inappropriate and you were slightly embarrassed, but you were also desperate for this conversation to continue. Although you could not put your finger on the reason why you couldn’t help yourself. It wasn’t hard to deny the attraction you had to the doctor, he was enigmatic and well-spoken, anyone would fall head over heels in a matter of moments. But you also knew the other multifaceted sides of him. You knew him beyond just Dr. J.M.K, you knew him as just Josh. You’d seen him when he was stressed and his hair was wildly pointed in different directions from him messing with it while he paced in his office. You knew the sleepy Josh who could barely keep his eyes open, but was still insisting on working and you would have to force to go home. In all honesty, he was one of your closest friends, although you’d never admit it. He was still your boss after all. 

“It’s only a question, I don’t mean to offend or make you uncomfortable. That is never my intention.” He held his hands up defensively and you smiled at him. 

“No. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced such a thing.” 

“Oh, trust me you would remember if you had.” The smirk he gave you went straight to your core and you had to stop yourself from clenching your thighs together. 

“You know I’ve had sex before. I’m no shrinking violet.” 

“I never said that. I can tell that you’re a sexual being… we all are after all. But you’ve never experienced it as something deeper than just yourself. As something spiritual and sacred. Sex and masturbation are sacred. It’s connecting yourself with the divine entity that exists within you, the creator of the universe around you. It’s two cosmic beings becoming one, connecting on every level possible, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.” 

“Only two beings?” You couldn’t help yourself. 

His laugh faded into a smile with a warm glint in his eyes. “Let’s start slow.” 

“Okay. So what’s it like?” 

“What’s what like?” 

“This magical experience. Otherworldly sex.” You stretched out your legs and then crossed them so you could lean forward to listen intently. 

“It’s indescribable.” 

“That’s a cop-out.” You commented with an eye roll. 

“But it’s the truth. You have to experience it. You can’t be told about it. You must live it.” 

You exhaled and laid back on the bed, stretching your arms above you. “A shame I’ll never experience it then.” 

“And who's to say that?” 

“I can’t afford your classes, Doctor.” You joked. 

“Would you like to learn?” He whispered. “Would you like to learn your body more intimately than you have before? Do you want to know what it’s like to experience the deepest love from within you? Can I teach you? Let me teach you.” 

You stared at the ceiling, there was a crack leading from the window and some water damage in the corner. All you could hear in the small room was both of your breathing, in sync and profound. “Teach me.” You eventually answered. 

He remained seated and you continued to stare at the ceiling, it felt as though if you looked at him it would all become too real and the implications would overtake your yearning and you would have to stop. You didn’t want to stop, but if you thought too hard, you knew you would have to. So you focused on the water spot in the ceiling and waited with bated breath. 

“Tell me how you normally masturbate.” He instructed. 

“Josh…” you muttered. 

“Would it help if I asked questions instead?” You nodded. “Okay. Do you lie in bed?” You nodded again. “Good. I want you to lie as you normally would. However you feel most comfortable.” You moved and got comfortable. Once you were settled he spoke again. “Take deep breaths with me. I want you to breathe completely in, feel the breath throughout your whole body. Tense your muscles on the inhale and totally relax them on the exhale. Fill up your lungs. Good.” You breathed together for a few moments, you felt any tension in your body dissipate with each breath. “You’re doing so good.” You bit your lip to stop the whimper that threatened to escape. 

“If you’re comfortable, could you undress for me? You can stay under the blankets if you’d like.” You pushed the blankets off of your body and lifted your hips to take off your pants. You sat up to pull off your shirt and then laid back down, as gracefully as you could, but you felt like you failed miserably as your breasts jiggled. A flash of embarrassment raced through your body. 

“Beautiful.” He muttered to himself. You were sure you weren’t supposed to hear it, but it still calmed any embarrassment immediately. He cleared his throat. “When you are ready I want you to think of an intention for this session. What do you want to gain from this experience? What could you bring into your breadth of understanding that could serve you better? As you think, continue to breathe. In and out. In and out.” You focused on your breathing and thought about the possibilities of your intentions. “Once you’ve found something I want you to concentrate on that intention. No need to tell me your intention, just as long as you are satisfied with it. Keep maintaining your breathing.” You focused on your intention and breathing, feeling as if your body was practically floating above the bed. 

“You are doing an exceptional job. I’m so proud of you. Once you have your intention completely set in your mind, I want you to begin to touch yourself. Where do you love to be stroked on your body? What parts of you long to be licked, nipped, or kissed. These places are called your secondary erogenous zones. They are very important to the sexual experience, both alone and…” he coughed, “and with a partner.” You started with your neck and moved down slowly and purposefully to your clavicle, using your hands and fingers to rub and massage with differing pressure, focusing on any spots that felt especially good. You felt your breath change and become faster as small whimpers and moans fell from your lips. “Maintain your breathing, my dear. In and out. In and out.” You concentrated on his voice as you continued to explore your own body. When you finally made it to your breasts you stroked them slowly as you moaned. “Yes, good. Make noise. So perfect. The sounds you make activate your chakras.” You wanted to roll your eyes if you weren’t so focused on your own pleasure because of course, he would bring up chakras while he was guiding you through masturbation. You didn’t know how to activate your chakras or even if you wanted to, but you continued to make noise as it came naturally. Especially when you started to give attention to your nipples. Slowly, you worked your way down your body, you massaged your hips and your thighs and then to your center. 

Your back arched as you began to touch yourself. “That’s it. Touch yourself. Take it slow. An orgasm is not your end goal. The goal is the intention you set for yourself. Focus on your intention. Focus on your body and your breathing. Feel every part of your body thrumming with ecstasy. Feel how it starts at your center and moves throughout your whole body. Do you feel it?” 

“Yes!” You gasped breathlessly. You tried to focus on your breathing, but it was getting harder as the pleasure built up in you. 

“In and out, baby. In and out.” You followed along to the mantra he began of ‘in and out.’ And then you started to use the words literally and began to pump your fingers in and out of you to his description. You used your other hand to rub circles around your clit. “When you’re ready, let go. Let the pleasure you’ve created for yourself wash over you. Connect with your inner divine. You’ve made yourself feel so good.” 

“So good.” You muttered. You felt the pressure building up within you, it had been increasing slowly since you started, but now it felt like it was rushing forward, like a pot about to boil over. You breathed in and out and let yourself make noise as your hips bucked in rhythm with your fingers. And then you felt yourself fall over the edge into the most beautiful feeling you’ve ever experienced in your life. The waves of pleasure rippled through your whole body and they wouldn’t stop. You kept breathing through it and you could hear Josh praising you in the background. As the pleasure slowly subsided and you returned to Earth, you resumed your deep breathing. 

“Very good. You barely needed me. You were so incredible.” Josh beamed. You could feel the admiration in his voice. You opened your eyes and turned to look at him. His face was flushed and at some point, he’d returned his glasses to their rightful spot resting on the bridge of his nose. His hands were gripping tightly on the arms of the loveseat. And your eyes scanned lower to see why, his arousal obvious in his sweatpants. Even though you had just experienced the best orgasm of your life, you felt a familiar pulse flutter at the sight of him. 

“Josh.” You breathed. He took his time tearing his eyes away from your body to look you in the eyes. You took your bottom lip between your teeth when his eyes met yours. His eyes blinked slowly and he swallowed deeply. When he stood up, your heart sped up. This was all you wanted. You needed his hands on you, his mouth nipping and kissing, all of him connecting with all of you. 

He ran a hand through his hair and tugged it slightly before dropping his hand at his side with a thud. “I - I should, uh, take a shower.” He started toward the bathroom and you urgently sat up on your knees in the bed. You grabbed him before he got very far. 

“Don’t. I can take care of you too.” You murmured. His eyes fell toward your lips. But then he shook his head. 

“You don’t need to do that. I didn’t guide you to get anything out of it. That’d be highly unethical.” 

“Do you always get hard when guiding your clients?” 

He laughed nervously. “No, no I, no I never do. It would be inappropriate.” 

“So I’m just that special.” You rubbed his arms that were in your grasp. 

“Of course you’re special.” His features softened. “But we can’t do this. It is against all my training. I don’t touch my patients. Never.” 

“Good thing I’m not a patient, Doctor.” You smirked. He tried to take a step back, but you stopped him. “Josh. I am a consenting adult. I am not one of your patients. I did not contract your services. Nothing monetary has been exchanged between us. We are just two people who want each other.” 

“You want me?” You wanted to laugh, for a sex doctor, he was pretty clueless. 

“Emphatically.” You allowed yourself a small breathy laugh. “For a long time. Do you want me?” 

“Ardently.” He replied and pulled you against him, your breasts grazed the fabric of his white shirt and you let out a breath. “Can I kiss you?” 

“Please.” His lips were soft against yours, just like you imagined they would be. He deepened his kiss as his hands roamed your body, his fingers, and palms mimicking the same paths yours had earlier. 

“So soft.” He murmured against your lips and you used the opportunity to slip your tongue into his mouth. The moan he emitted rang through you, all the way down to your toes and you tangled your hands into his hair to pull him closer. His glasses bumped against your face and he pulled away and threw them behind him onto the loveseat as you giggled. He was breathless as he looked at you, his eyes roamed every part of you he could see, as if he was seeing his favorite piece of art in person for the very first time. His attention made you feel like the most beautiful and prized thing in the entire universe. Your breath caught in your throat as his tongue circled one of your nipples and he pulled it into his mouth. His hands caressed your hips and then moved to massage your ass. 

“You’re so perfect.” He sighed and kissed a trail across your chest to your other breast. Your own hands began to explore his body, running down and back up his back and then his sides. You slipped your hand underneath his shirt and pushed him away slightly so you could pull it off. Before he could resume kissing you, you leaned forward and started to kiss and nip at the edge of his jaw just below his ear. You were rewarded with a breathy whimper and you smiled against his skin. As your lips explored his neck and chest, your hands wandered further down, palming him over his sweatpants. His hips jerked into your hand. You kissed down his body and shimmied yourself back further on the bed until you could lie on your front in front of him. You pulled down his pants and grabbed him in your hand. His tip was red and glistened with precum. You kissed it and he moaned. “You don’t have to,” he started, but you smiled up at him. 

“I want to.” And you took him into your mouth slowly. Even this felt like an exploration, as your tongue and lips swirled and sucked. He leaned over you and massaged down your spine which caused you to moan on his dick and you felt him falter. A few seconds later he pulled away from you. 

“I won’t last.” He said. 

You smiled a toothy grin. “Aren’t all you sex yogis supposed to be experts at lasting a long time?” You joked. 

“I’m not a yogi. I don’t think you know what that means.” He laughed and you shrugged slightly. “And yeah, I normally can. But, you’re driving me wild.” You sat back up on your knees and pulled him closer to you. You kissed him slowly and maneuvered so he could guide you onto your back and he could lay on top of you. “You don’t know what you do to me.” 

“Show me.” You instructed. He reached in between your bodies and began a lazy pattern on your clit, as you two stared into each other’s eyes and your breathing synchronized. You gasped when he slipped a finger inside you and almost instantly found the perfect spot. He massaged it until you were gasping and practically begging. Then he added another finger and continued his movements until you were writhing beneath him and gripping tightly onto his biceps as your pleasure came crashing through you. He guided you through it with both his hands and with encouraging words. He leaned down to kiss you as he removed his hands. “Please, I need you.” 

“Baby, I need you too.” He carefully slid himself into you, filling you up perfectly. You felt yourself stretch to accommodate him and you wrapped your legs around him and moved your hips to meet his movements. At first, he was unhurried and relaxed in his movements, but you could see that he was trying to restrain himself. So you lifted your head to kiss him and pulled him closer to you so you could ground your hips faster. He sped up to meet your pace. Your mouth went to his bare shoulder to muffle your noises as his hand slipped between your bodies to yet again find your sensitive bud. “That’s it. So beautiful.” He rambled. It seemed even during sex, he couldn’t stop talking. But you didn’t mind, because his voice felt like his kisses. They fell across your body and made you feel wholly perfect. You weren’t really sure about the whole inner divine goddess thing and didn’t know how to connect with it or her or them. But the way Josh talked to you made you feel like you could figure out how to create stars and hang them in the sky or command the ocean to ebb and flow or teach a bird to fly. No one had ever made you feel so in control and at their will all at the same time. You barely recognized as your pleasure hit its peak yet again, but you held on tight to Josh as your body shook with satisfaction. He found your lips and kissed them hard as he found his own release. He peppered lazy soft kisses along your neck and jaw as you both came down from your orgasms. 

“So that’s what it feels like.” You drawled as your muscles and body felt like jello. 

He laughed into the crook of your neck. “It can be even better.” He murmured. 

“Hmm, you’ll have to show me. I want to learn everything you can teach me.” You twirled one of his curls around your finger. 

“It could take a lifetime. The study of sexual tantra is never complete.” His eyes focused on yours. Your hand fell from his hair to the back of his neck. He leaned down toward you. 

“Sounds perfect.” You said right before you connected your lips with his. 

[marwritesgood]

Just Me | S. Basset

Pairing: Simon x WOC!Reader

Timeframe: Early Season One

Summary: Simon and Y/n had a long history together. So why did it take reading Lady Whistledown’s latest column for her to learn about his blooming relationship with Daphne Bridgerton?

masterlist

A/N: This fic is over 6K words. 

The mere thought of a BIPOC love story set in the 18th Century is enough to make me swoon. So I decided to give it a go and write one myself. There’ll be two more parts after this :)

I also wanted to keep the reader description applicable to any and all women of colour, so it’s a bit vague just to ensure all of us (women of colour) can feel included. Please let me know if there any parts of this fic that don’t do this and I’ll fix it asap! 

If you’re white, this fic is not for you to identify with x

Also, if at any point you find my attempt at mimicking the language used in Bridgerton laughable... you are not the only one lmao. This has been super fun to write and also very challenging, but I am well aware it is farrrr from perfect :)

Nonetheless, I hope it’s a nice read for my WOC readers <3

Simon and Y/n first met when they were children. Her mother was very closely acquainted with Lady Danbury, so naturally, a friendship grew between the two of them- and a strong one at that. 

For years, their interactions had remained within confinements of what was socially acceptable. They bickered. They laughed. They shared inside jokes about the people within their social circle. Their feelings for each other never extended beyond what was befitting of a friendship. 

That was until they grew older.

When marriage and love became more and more ingrained into casual conversations, Simon and Y/n explored their feelings for one another. Questioned the extent to which they cared for each other and whether there was something more beneath the surface.

However, just as Y/n came to realise her love for Simon, he left for London. After a few short weeks, he returned with a new title. A new vow that the Hastings bloodline would end with him. Subsequently, with it, any hope Y/n had of her relationship with him becoming anything more than all it had always been: a friendship.

A year had passed since the sorrowful conversation resulting in Simon and Y/n agreeing to not indulge in the affections they shared. Since then, Y/n struggled to focus on securing a marriage proposal from one of the suitors in her town.

“This is your second season,” Y/n’s mother cried as she paced across the sitting room. Y/n sat in silence, having been interrupted from playing the piano by another one of her panicked outbursts. “Your second season and yet you continue to reject every marriage proposal you receive.”

She couldn’t blame her mother for being frustrated with her. As her only daughter, she needed to find a good match and be married off as soon as possible. Her father was of old age, but even he remained restless that Y/n be married. He much preferred the prospect of dying knowing that the estate would be inherited by Y/n’s husband instead of his nephew.

“I did not reject Mr Graham’s proposal, mama,” Y/n responded, unnervingly calmly considering how distraught her mother was. Mr Graham’s proposal was the latest one she had received that season. “I... simply asked for more time to consider my answer.”

“What on earth is there to consider?” Mrs Y/l/n shrieked. Her frustration only grew when her daughter was unable to answer her question. Y/n turned away from her mother. “He is a good man. He comes from a good, honourable family and will give you a good future- something you will not have if you continue to turn away suitors.”

“Mama, please.” Y/n could not say anything more, for fear that her mother’s anger toward her would only grow if she were to find out the truth. The real reason she could not yet bring herself to accept a marriage proposal.

“Why do you need time to consider, Y/n?” Her daughter had stood up from behind the piano and had her back turned to her mother. That did not stop her from continuing to pry. After so many rejected proposals, she felt she had a right to know why her daughter refused to marry. “I beg of you, tell me- what is there to consider?... What could possibly be keeping you from marrying Mr Graham.”

They stood in silence for a moment before Y/n sighed exasperatedly and turned back to face her mother.

“I do not love him,” Y/n replied in a hushed cry, only just loud enough for Mrs Y/l/n to hear from across the room. “He may be a good man, mama, but I... I do not love him, and I do not believe I ever could.”

She knew from their first encounter that she could never love him. Perhaps it was how he mispronounced her grandmother’s name or the way he possessed the same arrogance as every other suitor Y/n encountered. 

“My dear,” Mrs Y/l/n said, her voice and expression softening entirely. She reached out for her daughter’s hand and took hold of it gently. She knew precisely how Y/n felt, which meant that, unfortunately, she knew there was nothing to be done. “We have talked about this. Women like you and I... we do not have the luxury to make decisions based on our own feelings.”

Y/n was surrounded by women who did not share the same experiences she did. Women who could not empathise with the challenges she faced and being a woman in the 18th Century. Not even if they tried.

Therefore, whenever Y/n found herself hoping for the same things as the white women around her, she had to bring herself back to reality. She had to remember that if life was unkind to white women, it would always be hell for women like her, no matter who married into the royal family.

“I know,” Y/n answered. 

She did. She knew it was incredibly reckless of her to reject all of the proposals she had received. She knew she was naïve for basing her decision based on love. Yet, even so, she could not keep herself from holding out on the hope that she would not end up in a loveless marriage.

“I do not mean to upset you, Y/n,” Mrs Y/l/n said sincerely, as she guided her daughter to the nearest seat. “But I fear that if you continue on, you will have no more proposals to reject, and I... I simply cannot bear the thought... Please, dear, you must-”

Y/n began to close her eyes ready to brace herself for what she feared would inevitably happen- her mother insisting she accepts a proposal. However, just as she did, a maid knocked on the door and promptly brought in the newspaper. When Simon left for London, Y/n requested that any newspaper copy or mail sent to her from London be immediately handed to her. She looked forward to any kind of update on him.

“Thank you,” Y/n said to the maid as she handed her the newspaper. Without hesitation, she immediately turned to Lady Whistledown’s column.

“What does it say?” Her mother asked, giving up on her attempts at convincing Y/n to accept a marriage proposal, at least for the time being. 

Y/n’s blood ran cold as she read the column. She had expected to hear more about the bitter impression Simon was leaving in London. She was going to comment on how typical arrogant white elitists villainising anyone who did not approach them in a way that appeases their ego.

But that was not what she read.

Instead, she read about Simon showing a particular interest in the woman named the ‘Diamond of the Season’ by the Queen herself- Miss Daphne Bridgerton. She read about him courting her and spending a significant amount of time with her. She read about flowers, the expensive kind, and walks through Hyde park, and she was unsure whether to feel betrayed or feel furious.

It was one thing for Simon to begin courting another woman, after explaining to Y/n that he would never marry. It was another for her to have to learn all of this from reading the Lady Whistledown column. 

Without providing her mother with an answer as to what the column wrote, Y/n slammed the newspaper against the table beside her and stood up abruptly. 

Her mother went to reprimand Y/n for slamming the paper so violently against her favourite table. However, Y/n walked hastily into her bedroom. She began to plan what she was to pack when she would leave for London in the morning.

She was adamant on learning the truth in its entirety. And, this time, not from an anonymous publisher but from Simon himself.

***

Y/n had an aunt who lived in London with her husband and their three kids- all much younger than Y/n was. She knew that if she could get away with arriving in London unannounced with intent to stay for longer than a week, her only luck was with her aunt.

After she was escorted inside by one of the workers, Y/n stood and marvelled at her aunt’s husband’s estate. It looked nothing like the sitting room at her home. It looked fancier with much nicer things, leading her to think back to why her mother pushed so hard for her to marry. Mrs Y/l/n had helped her younger sister find a match, and now she lived in a beautiful home in London. 

Perhaps all she wanted was to ensure the same future for her only child.

“Y/n, my dear!” Her aunt came bursting through the doors with arms stretched out. She pulled Y/n into a tight embrace as she always did whenever greeting her niece. Before her three children, she had Y/n. “Oh, how I have missed you!”

“I have missed you too, Aunt Philippa,” Y/n smiled, gently clutching her aunt’s hand as she held her cheek. “Please forgive me for arriving here unannounced. I would have written to you in advanced, but I have an urgent matter to attend to.”

“Do not be silly, my dear,” Philippa laughed, before guiding her niece out of the sitting room and towards the staircase. “You are welcome to stay here for as long as you may need. Though I imagine your mother will be impatiently anticipating your return... how is my dear sister?”

“As restless as ever,” Y/n mumbled. Philippa’s laughter echoed across the halls. Just as she expected, her older sister had not changed. Not one bit. “She is adamant that I am engaged by the end of the season, which is part of the reason I needed to leave home so quickly.”

“I do not blame you, dear,” Philippa murmured. She knew from first-hand experience how relentless Y/n’s mother could be. Even so, she knew it was out of love. Y/n knew as well. “Now... what is the urgent matter you need to attend? I imagine you will need a chaperone... and perhaps a carriage?”

Y/n smiled in relief. Everything she had done leading up to her arrival in London was purely impulsive. She hadn’t even thought of how she would get to Simon or who she would have to escort and chaperone her. 

“You wouldn’t happen to know the whereabouts of... the Duke of Hastings?”

Philippa’s eyes grew twice in size. Whether it was shock or excitement, Y/n could not figure out. It wasn’t until her aunt pulled her into the nearest empty room, checked to see if anyone was listening in, and grinned at her that Y/n concluded it was the latter.

“When I read about the Duke and Miss Bridgerton, all I could think of was you,” Philippa began, speaking in a hushed tone, though unable to contain her excitement. She did not typically indulge in gossip, but she was entirely invested in staying updated to her niece and Simon. “You never did tell me what happened when he returned. Did you confess your feelings?”

Philippa had generously volunteered her afternoons so that her niece could practise what she would say to Simon. She hoped those afternoons had not been spent in vain.

“I did... And then he did too... Before telling me, he would never marry,” Y/n explained, trying to conceal the way her breath hitched and the way tears welled up in her eyes. “Though, after reading Lady Whistledown’s column, it is clear that perhaps he meant that he would never marry me.”

Philippa frowned and lifted her hand up again, holding the side of Y/n’s face and swiping the few tears she couldn’t stop from escaping. As she did so, Y/n inhaled sharply- trying desperately to keep herself from indulging in her sorrow.

“I am sure that is not the case, dearest,” Philippa insisted. 

She refused to believe Simon would do that to her niece. Not after the stories she had heard from Y/n as they grew up. Not to mention all the times she caught one staring at the other across ballrooms and dining tables. 

“We must hurry,” she chirped, dropping her hand so she could grasp her niece’s arm. “I believe the Duke will be in Hyde Park with Lady Danbury. ‘Tis best we leave now if we wish to catch them.”

Y/n smiled. Being with her aunt was a nice change of pace to being with her mother. She would have scolded Y/n had she caught wind of what had happened. 

***

Upon their arrival at Hyde Park, Philippa approached Lady Danbury. Her plan was to make conversation with her, find out more about Simon and Daphne’s relationship. Then, she would ultimately create a segue for Y/n to have a somewhat private conversation with Simon.

However, Y/n had other plans.

When they arrived, she scanned the park in search of Simon. Once she spotted him walking alone on the pavement, she threw caution and decorum to the wind. Before her Aunt Philippa could stop her, Y/n sprinted. 

Once she reached him, she grabbed his shoulder roughly, prompting him to turn around.

“Peach,” Simon whispered, dumbfounded by Y/n’s sudden appearance.

He stopped calling Y/n by her name when they were five. Instead, he called her Peach, for reasons that remained a mystery to Y/n. Despite not knowing the reasoning behind it, she always adored it. She was the only person he had a unique designated name for.

More recently, she wondered if Miss Bridgerton would soon become an exception.

“You owe me an explanation,” Y/n said harshly, not having the patience to beat around the bush. This was primarily because she wanted to know the truth and because she was out of breath from sprinting to Simon.  “Do I really mean so little to you, Simon?”

“Please lower your voice,” Simon begged, subtly grabbing Y/n’s arm and quickening their pace to avoid the crowded area of the park. 

“Do not speak to me as though I am a child,” Y/n growled, yanking her arm away from him and stepping back. 

“Then do not act like one,” Simon retorted.

Y/n scoffed, before dusting off her dress. Simon rolled his eyes to cover his nervousness. He had a habit of concealing it with aggression. Y/n was often able to see through it, but she was guilty of doing the same.

“What changed?” Y/n asked as she looked back at Simon. “You seemed so certain when you told me you would never marry. Now you have extended your stay in London to court Miss Bridgerton?”

“I wish I could give you an answer,” Simon responded honestly. It was perhaps the most honest statement he had made all month. 

His courtship of Daphne was a mere ruse to attract more suitors for her. Truth be told, Simon was incredibly stressed by it, but he was too deep into the lie to give up any time soon. He hadn’t anticipated Y/n would be caught in the middle of it.

“Well, what could be hindering you from doing so?” Y/n cried, confused by how vague and cryptic Simon was acting.

He struggles to find the right words. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Y/n any more than he already had, but he could not give her the answer she wanted. Although he was not actually courting Daphne, he still would not marry. Thus, he could not do what would make her happy, which was the main reason he kept his distance from her in the first place.

“Things are different now,” Simon said apologetically, hoping to deter Y/n from prying. Though he desperately wanted to say more, he knew that doing so was incredibly risky. “We... we are not children anymore.”

Y/n blinked, astonished by Simon’s reaction. It was far from what she had expected. She expected an explanation. She expected assurance. Instead, she has pushed aside as though she and her feelings were disposable. 

This was a familiar feeling to Y/n.

“Is that all you think of me?” She asked angrily. Simon, of all the people in her life, had the most power to hurt her. And he often did so without realising. “A child?... And our relationship? You think it is something as easy to put behind you as your childhood? Is that all this is to you, Simon?”

She went to speak again. To demand what she felt she had a right to. However, before she could get a word out, a woman appeared from behind her. She was fair-skinned and wore a dress that resembled her complexion. 

“Miss Bridgerton,” Simon gasped. He did not know whether to be grateful for her arrival or concerned about how it would affect Y/n. He eventually became both. “May I introduce you to Miss Y/l/n. She is a... very close family friend.”

Y/n had to keep herself from scoffing. She was more to him than just a friend. Y/n knew that well, despite Simon’s denial.

“I am terribly sorry,” Miss Bridgerton cried, averting her attention to Y/n. “I did not mean to intrude.”

“Not at all,” Y/n assured, smiling sincerely at Daphne. Her anger was entirely directed towards Simon. Unlike him, Daphne had no pre-existing history with Y/n to remain considerate of. “I actually must return to my aunt. It was lovely to finally meet you, Miss Bridgerton.”

Before Y/n turned to walk back to her Aunt Philippa, she glanced back at Simon, who was very clearly terrified of how calm Y/n was. He could only imagine the amount of anger she was harbouring. Deterring her would prove to be much more complicated than he expected.

“Your grace,” Y/n snarled through gritted teeth, before forcing a smile as she turned away.

***

It had been a week since Y/n and Simon’s interaction at Hyde Park.

Y/n sat beside her aunt Philippa in a carriage as she read through her mother’s letter. She had made vividly clear, through an eight-paged rant, that she was absolutely livid with her daughter. Y/n’s hands were trembling. 

“I assume she is quite upset?” Philippa asked, though she already knew the answer. 

Y/n had extended her stay to a week just so she could attend a gala at Lady Danbury’s estate. It was her last hope of catching a moment alone with Simon and gaining, at the very least, some form of closure. She hoped it would not come to that, but from their last interaction, Y/n was losing confidence.

“She is furious,” Y/n answered shortly, before folding the letter abruptly and placing it aside. Her mother wrote one demand that sent chills through her bones. “If I am not home within a week, she will come to London and take me back herself. Then, I will have to accept Mr Graham’s proposal.”

Philippa’s stomach dropped. She placed her hand atop her niece’s. Y/n looked down to conceal the tears that began to gather in her eyes. Philippa noticed and wrapped her arm around Y/n, gently squeezing her shoulder. 

“I am sure it will not come to that,” she whispered soothingly, though she struggled to sound sincere. Y/n nodded. She didn’t quite believe her aunt, but she knew there was no point in losing hope entirely. At least not yet.

Once they arrived at the gala, Philippa made conversation with a friend, whileY/n made way to Lady Danbury. The event was held in her courtyard. While others marvelled at her estate, Y/n felt a warm sense of nostalgia. When Lady Danbury brought Simon to her London estate during summers, she would often invite Y/n and her parents. While her parents and the Danburys made conversation in the house, Simon and Y/n would run about freely outside.

“Welcome back, Miss Y/l/n,” Lady Danbury smiled warmly, as Y/n and her aunt approached her.

“It is a pleasure to be here, my lady,” Y/n responded curtly, before laughing out loud as Lady Danbury pulled her into her arms for a tight hug. 

Once she let go, they made small talk. Lady Danbury asked Y/n how her parents were. Y/n asked Lady Danbury how she was and how her fruit orchards were. After they ran out of things to discuss, Y/n could not help but scan the room searching for Simon, who was nowhere to be found.

“I am not completely sure where he is,” Lady Danbury said, startling Y/n who had not realised how far from natural she was acting. “Though, he did complain about how suffocated he was by the throng here... I imagine he has gone to a place where it will be difficult for most to find him.”

Y/n thought for a moment. Lady Danbury was cryptic by nature, and after years of knowing her, she had a knack for figuring out what she meant. Once Y/n knew, she smiled at Lady Danbury, before excusing herself from the gala.

Y/n headed away from the gala and towards the maze area. It was well-lit, which she was grateful for as it meant she could navigate her way around swiftly. It felt like second-nature to her; running about in the Danbury’s London Estate. She forgot how much she enjoyed the thrill of running through and past the hedges.

Once she reached the maze’s centre, she saw Simon standing idle, his back towards where she stood. That was the place they spent most of their time. When they were younger, they would sit there and play games. As they got older, they would sit there and talk. Sometimes he would read while she drew. Sometimes vice versa. But most of the time, they spoke—about everything worth talking about, and then some.

“I remember the first time we played here together,” Y/n began, causing Simon to jump. Once he turned around and saw Y/n his tense posture softened, and a small smile appeared across his face. She felt relieved by it, though she didn’t want to let her guard down entirely. “I got lost, almost immediately, and you found me sitting here, cross-legged, in a puddle of tears. Do you remember?”

Simon chuckled. Of course, he thought. 

“You were inconsolable when I found you,” he mocked, prompting Y/n to reach out and lightly punch his shoulder. His laughter only grew.

“We were five,” Y/n reasoned. She would never admit that she was dramatic. Not even as a child. “I genuinely thought no one would ever find me... and then you did, within a matter of minutes.”

She joined him in laughing. It made for a very entertaining story that they retold relentlessly. While others were sick of hearing it, neither of them were sick of recounting it, for their own reasons.

“I told you I would never leave you behind,” he added, smiling as he thought back to that day. His smile faded quickly when he realised the irony. He frowned and took a step towards Y/n. “Peach, I must apologise-”

“-No... I am the one who must apologise,” she intervened. Simon stood back in confusion. Y/n sighed before clarifying herself. “I did not mean to blindside you so aggressively before. I did not come here to argue with you, Simon, I... I came to ask you if it is true... Are you courting Miss Bridgerton... with the intent of marrying?”

Simon winced. 

He felt conflicted by both his love for Y/n and the promise he made to Daphne to uphold their ruse. He could not in good faith outright admit that he was merely pretending to court Miss Bridgerton. However, he couldn’t bear the thought of breaking Y/n’s heart a second time.

His lips parted, but his mouth ran dry. Before Simon could keep himself from blurting out the wrong thing, he was overcome by a habit he developed over the last month of playing along.

“I am,” he answered.

Just as he did, he lifted his hand to his temple and scrunched his eyebrows. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Y/n. He was still haunted by the look on her face when he told her he would never marry.

“Right,” she sniffled, unsure how to react. Y/n had convinced herself that there was more to the story than what she had read from Lady Whistledown. She regretted how in-denial she allowed herself to become. 

One thing Y/n knew for sure, though, was that she did not want to be near Simon. Although she was on the verge of sobbing, she still turned around and intended to leave him, but Simon grabbed her arm and kept her from doing so.

“Please let me explain,” he begged.

Y/n’s tears halted as she glared at Simon, shocked. She shook her arm out of his grasp and took a step back from him. She had always despised the way men often treated women as though they were disposable and replaceable. She never expected Simon to be one.

“There is no explanation necessary,” she scoffed.

“Y/n, please, you do not understand,” Simon cried. It was rare for him to call her by her name, but Y/n dubbed it as him trying to manipulate her emotions. She would not let that happen. 

“No, of course, you would deceive me,” Y/n spat, unwilling to let Simon get a word in. She was tired of waiting around just to hear from him. This time, she would be the talking. He would be the one listening. “-about not wanting to marry or have children, and of course, I believed your ridiculous lie, like the fool I have always been for you.”

“Ridiculous?” Simon hissed. Y/n’s dismissal of his vow sparked a fit of anger that overcame him before he could realise it had done so. No one had ever called to question or criticised his decision to remain a bachelor for life. No one until Y/n.

“Perhaps not a ridiculous lie,” Y/n sneered. “No, it was more-so childish and nonsensical.”

“And yet, you believed it... What is that to say about you, Miss Y/l/n?” Simon scorned. Y/n flinched. Simon had only ever addressed her in such a way to either tease her or to emphasise his anger. It had been a long while since he had done so for the latter. “It was not a lie, Y/n, I... You could never understand the immense pressure I have been placed under my entire life-”

“- Pressure that significantly decreased with the death of your father,” Y/n argued. Simon acted as though he had a monopoly over her when it came to challenges in life. He could not have been more wrong. “I, on the other hand, am placed under severe pressure and will continue to be, long after my parents pass... That is one of the many things you will never understand.”

“That is not true,” Simon fired back, only for Y/n to continue speaking- this time, with a louder voice.

“We may be the same in one sense, but we are significantly different in another, because you, Simon, are still a man with a title.” Y/n and Simon both shared similar challenges as neither of them were white. However, where Simon inherited certain advantages for being a man, and a Duke, Y/n was only disparaged more. He often forgot that. “You, at the very least, still have the luxury of choice. To choose how you wish to fulfil your future, and whether or not that may include a wife or children.”

Simon lowered his eyes defeatedly. Though he was still angry, there was no denying the shame he felt. 

“I do not. Those choices were made for me the moment I was born a daughter and not a son. So do not act as though you are in a position to empathise with me,” Y/n said. “Especially when you have been the least bit empathetic after I came all the way here, just to confirm the truth about you and Miss Bridgerton.”

“I never told you to come to London,” Simon snapped.

“No, you did not,” Y/n retorted, with just as much, if not more, annoyance in her voice. “You did not tell me anything. I had to find out at the same moment as everyone else in England, as though we are strangers.”

Simon flinched as Y/n progressed from speaking loudly to outright shouting. He had always relied on having her sympathy and her support, even when he was in the wrong. Thankfully, they were far from the gala. However, Simon still feared someone had heard her reprimanding him.

“You claim you are different, now that you are a Duke, but you are the same as you have always been,” Y/n continued. She knew how he had always been. Better than anyone, let alone Miss Bridgerton, that was for sure. “You are still rigid and arrogant. You are still a coward who will never allow himself to feel any kind of joy. And you are still revolving your every decision in life around a man you claim to despise.”

“You do not know a thing,” he whispered, which only confirmed to Y/n that he was scared. He was intimidated. For as long as they had known one another, Y/n rarely confronted his relationship with his father.

“I have watched you go from living only to please him to living only to spite him, even if it means hurting the people who actually care for you,” she cried. She had no more anger within her. Not any more. She had only sadness. “Did it ever occur to you how much it hurt when you rejected me?”

“That was never my intention,” Simon said regretfully. 

It was the truth, though Simon had begun to realise that his wrath against his father blinded him from what he cared about more: her happiness. 

“Peach,” he whispered, inching towards Y/n as he lifted his hand and held the left side of her face. “Please, believe me, I never meant to hurt you.”

Their eyes locked for what felt like an eternity. It had been so long since they had shared a moment like that. An intimate moment shared between no one but them. Where Simon was not the stoic and emotionally detached Duke of Hastings. He was Simon. Dare she say, her Simon.

Despite that, Y/n was the first to turn away. She wanted to indulge. To take advantage of the opportunity to reconcile with him. To enjoy how vulnerable he was, after months of distance. 

But she couldn’t. 

Not when there were still questions burning in her mind. She could not rest until they were dealt with. After all, she was her mother’s child.

“Then what about Miss Bridgerton?” Y/n’s expression remained stagnant, but she could not keep hands from trembling. Simon winced at the mention of Daphne. “You... courting her after rejecting me... You cannot possibly tell me you did not intend to hurt me when you did that.”

Simon opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He had no response to what she had said because there was no justification for what he had done. All he could do was curse quietly to himself for taking so long to realise how foolish he had been.

“I had always expected this to happen,” Y/n began, sniffling as she tried to compose herself enough to explain herself. Simon remained quiet and decided he would until she finished. He figured he owed her as much. “I always knew I would be turned away for someone like Daphne Bridgerton.”

It had been the subject of many of her mother’s lessons. Before she was introduced to society, her mother made it a point to prepare her for rejection. To not hold out hope for any man, until a marriage proposal was made. 

Simon had been Y/n’s only exception to that rule. 

“It’s happened to me my whole life,” Y/n laughed bitterly, as she recalled all the times she had lost to a woman of fairer skin than her. All the times she wept to her Aunt Philippa and to Simon. “I always expected this would happen. But I never expected this would happen with you.”

Simon’s eyebrows furrowed as he watched Y/n struggle to stifle her cries in between her sentences. He had watched her sit in this sorrow many times, just as she had done for him, for this was a pain she shared. But this time was different. This time he was the one responsible. 

He didn’t know pain, so heart-wrenching, was possible. But watching her cry and knowing he could do nothing to fix it. That pain had never felt more real.

“I do not blame you, Simon,” Y/n whimpered, which only made him hurt more. He wanted her to be angry. To berate him some more. It was the least of what he deserved for causing her such sorrow. “She is the ‘Diamond of the Season’ after all, and... I am just me.”

Y/n hated the pity party she was throwing for herself, but she could not help what she felt. After a life of being classed second to white women, who could blame her for internalising this? 

He was dying to say something. To tell Y/n that she had it all wrong. He wanted to reveal that his courtship of Daphne was all a ruse. That he could never bring himself to entertain the idea of marrying anyone but her. But his fear of only making things worse left him paralysed. 

“You have made it abundantly clear that I was a fool forever waiting around for you,” she said to Simon. Unfortunately for him, she had taken his lack of response as confirmation that what she had concluded of the situation was accurate. “I will not make that mistake again.”

“Peach-”

“Goodbye, Simon,” Y/n blurted as she turned away hastily. 

Left in too much shock to reach out and stop her, Simon stood, dumbfounded, and watched as the woman he loved walked away from him and back to the gala. Looking back, he wished he had called out to her. Simon wished he had run after her. But he did not.

When Y/n reached the courtyard where the gala was being held, she couldn’t help the wave of disappointment that rushed over when she realised Simon let her go. This assured her that she was right to leave him, but it did not alleviate the pain in doing so. 

She made her way through the crowd and searched for her aunt. As she did, she felt her cheeks burn and her pace of breath quicken. She had gone through all the effort of coming to London just for what she feared most to be the reality. 

“There you are, my dear!”

Y/n turned around and saw her Aunt approaching her. Philippa smiled brightly as she walked towards her niece. However, when she realised that Y/n’s enthusiasm fell short of matching hers by a significant margin, her smile began to fade.

“Where is Simon?” She inquired, her voice lowered to not draw attention to their conversation. From Y/n expression, Philippa inferred that was the last thing she wanted.

Y/n’s lip quivered as she tried desperately to answer her aunt’s question. When she failed to do so, she hung her head- too embarrassed to face her aunt. Philippa frowned. A line appeared between her brows as she reached out to her distraught niece.

Though she was dying to know, the details of Simon and Y/n’s conversation were the least of her concerns. All she cared for was her niece and helping her in any way she needed. 

“I will call for our carriage,” she whispered, before guiding Y/n out of the courtyard. 

Once their carriage arrived, Philippa sat opposite her niece and watched worriedly as she refused to make eye contact, let alone speak.

“Is there anything I can do?”

Y/n took a long moment to respond. She stared at her gloved hands as she thought about what to do next. She regretted all the proposals she had turned down, and all the ways she put her life on hold for Simon. She felt ashamed that she had allowed herself to be in the situation she was in. 

Then she realised the only thing she could do to fix it.

“May you organise a carriage to take me home tomorrow?” Y/n asked. Her aunt’s eyes widened. Returning home to face her mother was the last thing Philippa expected Y/n to want to do. 

She watched her niece closely, trying to figure out what her plan moving forward was. Y/n finally looked up and met her aunt’s gaze. To Philippa’s surprise, her niece had a prominent sense of confidence in her expression. 

“Why, my dear?” Philippa quizzed, her eyebrows still knitted in confusion as well as fear. The way her niece was suddenly overcome with confidence after being on the verge of tears was concerning. She couldn’t imagine it would lead to anything good.

Y/n inhaled sharply, pursing her lips as she did so. She knew her aunt would disagree with what she planned to do. But she also knew that, given the circumstance, Philippa would reluctantly do as she asked. Before she answered, Y/n momentarily glanced down at her hands and turned back to her aunt.

“I have a proposal to accept.”

NEXT PART

[actuallyintro]

Could you write something about Ed and Lorraine dealing with insults and taunts from the media? Like, in the middle of a talk show they’re trying to stay calm and stop each other from losing their composure (or punching the host’s teeth out, in Ed’s case).

Hi anon! I'm back with a fic for you. This one ended up taking a little longer than I had originally planned but I did research for it. I wanted to base some of it off of the University scene from the "Conjuring 1" and the interview scene from the "Conjuring 2" so I tried to find the actual scripts for those scenes. I hope you enjoy it and always feel free to send in another anon prompt!

Summary: While taking part in a media interview, one of the other guests manages to insult both Ed and Lorraine, causing Ed to come to his wife's defence. Luckily, she knows how to tell when he's upset and how to calm him down. (And yes, she does.)

Wordcount: 2051 - I do apologize for how long this ended up lmao. Once I started, I realized I had quite a few scenes I wanted to add.

Untouchable

“Heros or a Hoax?” Lorraine read quickly, looking at the article in front of her as she took a sip of her morning tea. What had started out as an attempt to peacefully read the morning paper, quickly turned into her reading an article all about both her and her husband.

With their profession, she’d quickly learned that no matter where they went, who they talked to, controversy or opinions followed never far behind.

They’d been relatively successful with the different college classes they’d been invited into, often finding the younger generation more susceptible, more willing to believe in what they did day to day. They asked questions and had a pure curiosity, something they didn’t often find in people their own age.

She’d found that being in front of people, the two of them presenting together made it a lot easier for people to accept what they were talking about, compared to the few times they did public interviews. The interviews always came in with the bias of being sceptics, and while she understood why, it made it a lot harder for either of them to explain what they both did.

As she thought back on it, one interview always stood out to her. It was always the interview they had participated in right before they’d been called into the Hodgson case. Lorraine wasn’t one for such public interviews, never wanting to put her gift on show for the world, but they’d been persistent and eventually, they both gave in, agreeing to be a part of it.

They’d gotten dressed that morning, matching his tie to her skirt like usual. She knew Ed would never admit it, (too much pride) but they both enjoyed matching, it made them feel connected. Their strong bond evident, even if just in their clothes.

Ed drove them to their interview, noticing right away just how nervous his wife looked. While driving, he reached over and lightly grabbed her hand, hoping she’d talk to him. Not wanting her to put all the pressure on just herself.

“Lorraine.. we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. We can just tell them we changed our minds.” He told her seriously, looking over to her as much as he could before refocusing on the road. He’d always been more willing to try and embrace the media than Lorraine, something both of them understood.

Ed knew he didn’t have a gift to protect, at least not in the same way Lorraine did. While the cases and the stories affected him from time to time, he knew it was nowhere near how it affected Lorraine. Where he always ended up thinking back to the time she locked herself away for eight days.

Letting out a small sigh, Lorraine shook her head. “It’s alright Ed. I saw the newspaper this week, the way they’re talking about us. It’s important to set things straight.” She told him, still holding his hand.

Ed nodded, not wanting to push the issue this close to the scheduled interview. He trusted her judgement and trusted her to know her limits, what she could and couldn’t handle.

As they arrived at the interview, Ed opened the passenger door for Lorraine, letting her take the lead in this process. He figured that if nothing else, giving her the chance to be in control, might help how nervous she was.

Once they were inside, they were both quickly rushed off to the last minute microphone and makeup cheeks. Lorraine didn’t enjoy the feeling of the makeup they often tried to use on her, preferring the feeling of her own brands, the brands she knew she liked.

“You look beautiful,” Ed told her lightly once they were reunited. Not much had changed but he still noticed the makeup she was wearing, something she hadn’t been when they’d left earlier that day. Lorraine smiled over at him, happily accepting the compliment as they made their way to the interview stage.

They took a seat next to each other on the interview stage, waiting for the rest of them to arrive.

One other “expert” joined the stage, sitting opposite of Ed before the interviewer took a seat at his own desk. Lorraine let out a small breath as she waited, hoping this could be over as soon as possible.

“And we’re rolling in 5-4-3-2-1.” Lorraine heard the cameramen announced as they started filming.

“Today, we are pleased to announce our guests, both Ed and Lorraine Warren and Dr Steven Kaplan and we’d like to thank all of you for being here.” The interviewer told all three of them, as the camera panned to show each one on screen.

The first half of their interview went as well as Lorraine could have expected. She noticed Kaplan didn’t say too much, mostly observing both of them. But she also couldn’t quite get over a bad feeling she had about him, that he was waiting to say something.

After the first half was done, the cameras were paused, giving them all a few minutes for a break. Lorraine grabbed Ed’s hand as she led them off-stage, into a part of backstage where nobody else was around. She didn’t need to talk, words weren’t necessary but rather she wanted to know he was there. He took the hint right away, pulling her into a tight hug as they stood in the quiet, Lorraine listening to his slow heartbeat as he did.

A few minutes later, they both knew they couldn’t avoid going back out there any longer. He wanted nothing more than to keep holding her, hoping she’d let him do just that once they got back home, but hearing the noise from the stage, Ed knew it was time to go back.

“Ready?” He asked quietly, looking down at her as he did.

Lorraine nodded, grabbing his hand as they headed back to their seats, only separating once they sat back side by side.

“And we’re back with paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren, talking about their experiences at the Amityville house and the name they’ve made themselves in their profession.” The interviewer started once the cameras were rolling again.

‘Now, we’re going to talk to our next guest, Dr Steven Kaplan. He says the investigations the Warren’s conducted into the Amityville haunting happens to be a load of hogwash.” He finished, as the camera panned over to Kaplan, sitting up and looking smug in his seat.

Ed looked between the two of them, before interrupting, “And why is that?” He kept his voice as calm as possible, not wanting to say something rash.

“Well, it’s well established that Amityville was a blatant hoax. There’s no evidence to prove anything happened here.” Kaplan told him, his voice matter of face. He was confident in his research and the knowledge that nothing bad ever happened at Amityville.

“That’s never been proven-” Ed started before being cut off, Kaplan trying to finish with his reasoning.

“But yes it has. The Lutz family made everything up so they profit off of all the publicity. The book-deals, the movie contracts and the public interviews.” Kaplan finished, never wavering from his stance.

Lorraine could tell her husband was getting agitated, knowing all the ways he tried to hide it. She could tell as his posture tensed up and how his once relaxed hand, now sat clenched together at his side.

“That's just not true.” He started, looking directly over at Kaplan. “Understand, we see this all the time. It’s very easy to sit on the outside and pick apart their story. But it’s something very different to have been there and experienced it for yourself.”

Rather than wanting him to get more upset, Lorraine took a chance and reached over to grab his hand. She sighed silently in relief when he unclenched his fists, feeling them relax against her own.

“Listen.” Kaplan reclaimed, focusing all his attention back on the interview.

“Ed Warren’s never seen a house that he didn’t think was haunted. And by the time his wife is done blowing smoke and ringing bells, they’ve got everybody else believing in ghosts, too.” And for Ed, that was the moment he stopped playing nice. It was one thing to question him, to question the things he did, but it was another thing entirely to question his wife.

“What exactly are you a doctor anyway?” Ed asked, his voice sarcastic as if he dared Kaplan to keep speaking.

“Come on, Warren. Try and show a little class, will you?” Hearing those words, Lorraine flinched slightly, knowing nothing good would come from that. She held his hand tighter, hoping it would be enough to calm him down. Just long enough so they could get out of there.

“I’m not going to show class to somebody sitting here telling lies about my wife and I.,” Ed said, refusing to take him seriously anymore. He understood why people could be sceptical, what they did… what they experienced wasn’t something most people would ever come into contact with. But that didn’t mean, he’d let him sit there and insult who there were as people.

“Be careful who you call a liar,” Kaplan told him, leaning back into his chair as he looked over at Ed.

Before either Lorraine or Ed could respond, the interviewer stepped in at the direction of the director.

“And that’s all the time we have tonight. We’d like to thank all three of you for being here again.” The interviewer told them as the cameras stopped filming and the interviewer let out a breath he’d been holding.,

Once “cut” was called, Lorraine practically pulled Ed out of his chair, not wanting him left alone with Kaplan.

She pulled him backstage, handing him his coat as they got ready to go, knowing neither of them would want to be there longer than they needed. “Lorraine... I’m sorry.” He told her as he put his coat on, figuring she’d already be upset with him.

Lorraine put her own coat on, ready to head out, just as they were stopped by one of the members of the production.

“Mr and Mrs Warren, we know things were slightly tense out there, but we wanted to thank you both again for agreeing to this interview.” The crew member told them, reaching out to shake both of their hands.

Smiling as much as she could, Lorraine shook their hand back, telling them, “Thank you for having us. We appreciated the opportunity.” Once they were done, she let out a small breath as they made it back outside, finally feeling like she could breathe again.

However, rather than getting right into the vehicle as Ed had expected, Lorraine pulled him over to the side of their car, giving him a tight hug. Slightly surprised, it took a second for him to react before quickly hugging her back, relieved it seemed she wasn’t overly mad at him.

“I didn’t mean to react the way I did. I know.. people don’t usually get it, but I just hate hearing the way people talk about you.” Ed explained as if it wasn’t something she already knew. She knew he was protective, especially about her and their daughter.

“Ed, I know. I know he was trying to get under your skin and I know you were just trying to defend me. Obviously, I don’t love when you’re short like that, but I get it.” She emphasised, wanting him to know that no, she wasn’t mad at him.

Looking down at her, he ran a hand through the top of her hair before eventually moving back just enough from their hug as he placed a hand just under her chin so he could lean down to finally kiss her. “I love you.” He told her sincerely.

“I love you, too,” Lorraine told him, still holding his hand before looking up at him with a mischievous smile.

“Is now the appropriate time to say I told you so about interviews?” She teased lightly, letting him open the passenger door for her, ready to finally get home. Judy was staying at a friend's house for the night, meaning she’d get her husband all to herself for the night. And no matter how much she could admire him defending her, she enjoyed cuddling up with just so much more.

[of-a-chaotic-mind]

Love Birds

Summary: Sam and Reader are super lovey dovey, much to Dean’s annoyance.

TW/CW: Sam Winchester x Reader, flirty/lovey dovey Sam.  

Requested?: Yes! The amazing @the-departed-potato  said, “Hey I just saw that you were asking for Sam Winchester x Reader ideas and 100% had to ask. So I was wondering if you could write something where Sam and the reader are dating and in the “honeymoon phase” and Dean is friends with the reader and likes them together but acts all discussed by the constant PDA and cuddling and all that. (Third wheel Dean basically.) Anyway thank you!!! 😇”

Word Count: 978

A/N: How in the world do I manage to come up with fully detailed cases in just the time it takes to write this out?? Like I did it with another imagine the other day. I just don’t include all the details and stuff that I come up with lmao. Anyway, love to all, and All Requests are Open!!

Your POV

   I grab both plates off the kitchen counter and carry them to the map table. I place Sam’s in front of him and go to take a seat beside him with mine but he pulls me into his lap instead. He wraps his arms around me and hugs me tight as he nuzzles his face into my neck, “Thank you, honey. It looks delicious.”

   Across from us, Dean fakes like he’s going to vomit, “I’m trying to eat here.”

   I shake my head as Sam releases me and take my seat in the chair beside him. I take a few bites of my food before asking “So, what do you guys have?”

   Dean doesn’t even pull his eyes away from the newspaper spread out in front of him, which is clearly just the comics section, “Marmaduke is befriending a cat.”

   I roll my eyes, I swear the comics are the only reason he gets a paper anymore, “I meant the case that you two said you had. You know the one we’re supposed to leave for as soon as we’re done eating?”

   Dean only laughs at the comic so Sam finishes the bite of food in his mouth before answering, “Something weird is going on in Lafayette, Louisiana.”

   He passes me a print out of several news headlines. I look through them before returning my attention back to him, “Any ideas on what it is?”

   “A few but none of them quite fit right,” he answers. While we finish our food, Dean puts his comics away to join us in our discussion about what this case could and couldn’t be. Before long we finish our food and Sam stands to take both our empty plates to the kitchen, “Meet at the car in 15?” Dean and I both nod and go our separate ways to grab our bags from our rooms.

   Almost 4 hours and approximately 230 miles later, we’re stopping in Tulsa, Oklahoma for lunch. We grab a booth by a window and I slide into one side with Sam following behind me and Dean sitting across from us. We look over the menu and soon the waitress comes over and takes our order before rushing off again.

   “You two any closer to figuring out what this thing might be yet?” Dean ask as Sam pulls out his tablet.

   “Sammy had the great idea of putting our thoughts onto a chart on our way,” I say grinning at them both.

   “We’ve narrowed it down to a few things, but I’m still combing the article to narrow it down even more,” Sam says as Dean rolls his eyes.

   I wrap my arm around Sammy’s and lay my face against it, “Why is it so cold in here?” Sam chuckles and wraps his arm around me, using the other to scroll on his tablet.

   “It’s been 6 months now, shouldn’t this honeymoon phase be over already?”

   Just then someone drops into the seat beside Dean, “Aw, squirrely bear are you jealous of moose and his sweetheart?”

   Dean narrows his eyes at Crowley, “No, I’m not jealous. Why are you here?”

   “To see if you three know what’s been killing my demons in Lafayette,” he says nonchalantly as the waitress drops off our drinks. She looks at Crowley expectantly but he declines, “I don’t need anything. I won’t be here long.”

   She rushes off again as Sam gives Crowley a confused look, “Those people were demons?”

   “Indeed. I’ve never seen it before which is why I was hoping you three had a lead on it. Now do you or do you not?”

   Sam looks back at me, “Guess we should hit the drawing board again. Nothing on our list can kill demons.”

   I shrug, but before I respond, our waitress brings our food and Crowley takes off again as we descend on our plates like hungry vultures. We haven’t eaten since breakfast.  

   After we get back on the road, it’s another four hours before we stop for Dinner and then another four after that before we make it to a motel just outside of Lafayette. Once we’ve settled into our room, Sam looks at me, “Shower?”

   I nod with a mischeivious grin and follow him to the bathroom. Behind us a frustrated Dean sighs, “I guess that means I’m going next door to the bar for a bit. Don’t use all the hot water. I’ve gotta have a shower too.”

   The next morning, I wake up to Sam leaving little kisses all over my face and neck. I sit up and stretch as Sam smiles, “Good morning, sleepy head.”

   I mumble a good morning as he hands me a cup of coffee. Across the room, Dean rolls his eyes, “You two lovebirds hurry up and get ready. We’re supposed to meet with the coroner in an hour and it’ll take thirty minutes to get there.”

   I chuckle and down the last of my coffee before getting up to get ready for the day. I pull on my suit jacket just as Dean grabs his keys and heads for the car, “If you’re not in the car when I kick it into drive then you’re getting left here.”

   Sam and I both laugh and follow him out to the car, Sam smacking my ass on the way there. Dean glares at him for it as he gets in the car, “You know, I’m all for you two being together. You both seem happier because of it but for the love of all things good, give me one day where my best friend and brother aren’t all over each other. That’s all I ask.”

   Sam looks back at me with a grin on his face, “We might be able to manage that.” I laugh at the two as Dean pulls out of the parking spot and speeds off towards the county coroner.

Masterlist

Everything Taglist:

Sam Winchester Taglist:

[vantaenims]

paper bandits | jimin

pairing: jimin x reader

genre: high school au | fluff, humor, angst

word count: 12.9k

warning/s: stealing and lots of ogling Jimin moments lmao.

summary:  It’s pretty irresponsible for a student librarian to abandon her tasks in exchange for hiding behind a bookshelf at the back of the library, doing something impermissible with the class president you’re starting to crush really hard but oh well.

masterlist

all rights reserved © vantaenims - do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

--

The flag ceremony has been taking too long for your liking since the principal of the school managed to squeeze in her infamous ‘short speech’ that’s not even short to begin with as it has already been fifteen minutes when the speech started and she’s probably unaware that she has already taken ten minutes of everyone’s homeroom period.

Also, it isn’t very ideal to stand for an extended time and endure the cold spring air, specially in the early morning. Your school uniform isn’t enough to protect you away from the cold. Sure, you’re fully clothed with your long sleeve shirt, black vest, and navy blue blazer yet your lower body is freezing and suffering with only a skirt to cover your legs hence the reason why you’re brushing your shin against the back of your leg for some warmth.

You were relieved to hear that the principal started to conclude her speech, thinking you could finally do your unfinished Calculus homework for homeroom only to crush you down when she called the Student Council President, Kim Namjoon, for an announcement regarding his school project advocacy he implemented at the beginning of the school year - Project Paper Drive.

It’s main purpose is to encourage students to recycle paper materials such as newspapers, carton boxes, and other paper recyclables you can name. Essentially, the class with the highest contribution of recyclables by the end of the school year will be granted a pool party by the school’s very own swimming pool area plus a free food catering that will only be exclusive for the winning class. 

It’s also the reason why the competition has become fiercer between classes, specially those who are leading in the ranks. Ever since the project started, your class and Namjoon’s have always been battling to take the first place to which Namjoon’s class claimed the top spot during the first quarter only for your class to take their place by the second quarter, leaving you on a tie as of the moment.

“Good Morning! I am here to announce the top five classes this third quarter for Project Paper Drive” Namjoon announced to the microphone as he looked down on the paper he’s holding.

“Do you think we’re at number 1 this time?” Sora - your friend - asked you as she looked back at you with a quite anxious look that mirrors your exact same face right now as you eagerly wait to hear the results.

“I hope so” 

“The top two this time is…” you closed your eyes as you crossed your fingers, hoping that it’ll be Namjoon’s class but you were distracted upon the loud screams by your right when Namjoon spoke up, “Class 3-2! Congratulations Class 4-1 for taking the first place this third quarter!”

You bitterly looked over at Class 4-1 which happens to be Namjoon’s class. A scowl on your face is evident when you see them excitedly cheer each other, knowing how they now have the advantage of winning the project but that’s not what particularly is ticking you off. 

“Isn’t it unfair to let Namjoon’s class participate in this project?” you snickered to Sora.

“I bet he told them the project before the school started so they could have a head start.”

You were about to complain more when Namjoon announced that they'd discovered the school’s archived newspapers in the recyclables but they were unable to trace to which class it came from since all of the recyclables are combined all together and ready for sorting when they have found out. 

Namjoon then warned that the class will be eliminated from the project once they found out which class is responsible for stealing one of the school’s property.

“Everyone sure is competitive to go through those lengths” Sora said as she chuckled but you disregard her statement as you ask about one thing you’re more interested in.

“What happens though if we win next quarter? I mean-” you weren’t able to finish your sentence when your class adviser, Ms. Sung, shushed you as she ordered you to stand straight and put your arms on both of your sides, not even noticing that Namjoon’s done with his announcement, leaving everyone to go back to their own classrooms in an orderly manner. 

As you got back to your room, the once quiet and disciplined class in the school grounds turned into a bit of a chaotic scene now that you only have twenty minutes left for your homeroom period, making everyone in a rush as some get in and out of the room to get their things in their locker while the others are chatting loudly or how the others are doing their unfinished homeworks like what you are doing right now.

You fell asleep last night when you were working on your Calculus homework and you sure do regret it now as it’s the next subject after homeroom and you still have four questions yet to be answered or maybe you could blame it on the school principal’s ‘short speech’.

“Are you done with your Calculus homework?” you urgently asked Sora who just plopped her books down on her table next to yours, reminding yourself to get your things once you're done with this. 

“Here” Sora handed you her homework, thanking her as you wrote down the answers as fast as possible and once you were done, you stood up as you hurriedly made your way towards the door to go to your locker but Ms. Sung called you before you could make it outside the room.

“Y’N, can you call the class president while you’re outside?” you nodded as you got out of the classroom and you were instantly greeted with an empty hallway, considering everyone went through their lockers earlier except for you but you’re clueless where the class president is because you’re pretty much the only person in the hallway that is until you turned around the corner.

You first saw Jimin chatting up with his friends, Taehyung and Minjae, in a serious conversation as they seemed to not even notice your presence when you passed by. Not wanting to disturb their conversation just yet, you opted to head first towards your locker, looking over your schedule that’s pasted inside the door to get the text books you needed for today.

You looked back to see that they’re still completely unaware of your presence until you closed the door of your locker a bit too loudly when you hit it with your shoulder, cutting their conversation short as they glanced up towards the source of the noise.

“Jimin, Ms. Sung is looking for you” you said, walking to them closer with a bit of an embarrassed look for unexpectedly causing too much of a noise.

Jimin looked at his wristwatch, eyes widening once he took notice of the time, “Hey, let’s get back to the room.”

You continue to walk on your own after having said that but then Taehyung appeared right by your side with a big grin, “Y/N, are you done with Calculus?”

“Yeah, it’s on my table” you smiled, rolling your eyes in the process albeit playfully.

Taehyung is the one you’re closest with out of them three, simply because he’s the one sitting behind you. Truth be told, you were annoyed with him at first because of how he would constantly kick your chair during a quiz to ask you for answers but you eventually warmed up to him when he helped you out on that English quiz and since then, you’ve become ‘cheatmates’.

“Stop bothering her” Jimin said as he shoved Taehyung, making the latter chuckle as he ran off towards the classroom, shouting a thank you to you before he disappeared with Minjae inside the room.

“Here, let me help you” Jimin grabbed your books from you whilst offering you the sweetest smile you’ve ever seen.

This is one of the reasons why every girl in high school looks at him with hearts in their eyes but who wouldn’t anyway when Jimin has such a loving nature and an angel like personality - a total surprising quality for boys like his age who are rather rowdy and annoying. 

Not to mention, he’s also smart and reliable thus the reason why he has been consistently elected as the class president for years now which is totally a plus point  and it is true, that Jimin is indeed irresistible but let’s just say that you could describe your admiration for him as a passive one.

Reason is, it’s way too exhausting to like a boy that every girl likes and you don’t even want to deal with the competition so you don’t even wanna bother to join the other girls though you can’t guarantee that you’re safe away from exhibiting the same heart eyes for him from time to time because come on, we’re talking about Park Jimin here - no one can resist his charms.

“Thanks” you said as Jimin placed it on your table, smiling once again before he went towards the teacher’s table.

“Don’t start” you glared at Sora just as she was about to open her mouth.

“I haven’t even said something”

“I know what you’re going to say” you annoyingly replied, knowing full too well that she was just about to tease you as she always does since she’s that kind of person that sees malice in every little kind gesture from a boy and you sometimes hate how she thinks like that but oh well, you’re teenagers after all.

Jimin then walked towards the teacher’s table as he listened to whatever instruction Ms. Sung is giving him and then he politely bowed with a smile after they were done. He then went up the platform, walking towards the center as he spoke to call everyone’s attention.

“Everyone, I think you’ve all known that the project has been more competitive now that Class 4-1 reclaimed their place but there’s nothing to worry about. We still have one quarter left to top them and our recyclables are less than three kilos from them so it’s not much of a hassle to reclaim the top as long as we work on this together.” Jimin said with full determination, igniting everyone’s competitiveness. He was about to step down the platform that is until one of your classmates shared a brilliant suggestion for everyone to follow.

“I’ve got this from our neighbor” Jihyun stood up, raising her four liter plastic water container she brought with her today for the project, “Why don’t we start to collect recyclables around our neighborhood? It could help raise our numbers for this.”

Jimin clapped his hand as she pointed to Jihyun, “Ah yes, that’s a nice idea Jihyun. Any more suggestions?”

Everyone then started to relay one by one all their brainstormed ideas and it’s just fun to watch how the class looks so eager to win the project much like the attitude everyone exudes when it’s the school’s field day. 

Nothing unites a class more when they’re after the same goal of winning, specially when we’re talking about an exclusive year end class pool party. 

--

“Hey, isn’t it time for your shift already?” Sora asked you whilst looking at her wrist watch, making you do the same only for you to see that it’s already 12:40 in the afternoon which could only mean that you’re duty as the student librarian started ten minutes ago.

You scrambled on your feet as you aimlessly collected all of your things including the book you’re too engrossed reading that caused you to miss the time, “I’ll see you later!”

You hastily went out of the cafeteria as you rushed to the short cut, climbing the stairs two steps at a time until you finally made your way inside the library. You paused for a bit as you tried to catch your breath whilst you leaned your hips against the circulation desk.

“Y/N, you’re late” Ms. Kim, the school librarian, looked at you with a smile then looked back down to continue her duty of photocopying some papers, “I’ll let this pass since you’ve never been late.”

“I’m sorry, i was too busy reading and i didn’t notice the time” you said with relief evident in your voice as you went behind the desk to take the remaining papers from her.

Being a student librarian was not something you imagined to do but ever since junior year started, you decided to take on anything that could build up your student resume and get extra credits in preparation for the college entrance exam you’ll be taking in your senior year.

It’s not like it’s an actual bad thing considering you love reading books anyway but besides that you’ve also decided to compete during the school’s field day for the Volleyball game that got  your team winning first place and to top that, your Science Investigatory Project was chosen to be featured during the Science Fair.

An average student is what describes you best but you muster every effort you got in you to be one of the best students out there since you’ve been dreaming of getting into Seoul National University though you must say that you’re still quite lacking when it comes to academics, specifically at Math.

“Is there anything else i can do?” you asked, placing down the stack of photocopied papers next to her.

Ms. Kim shook his head no at you, “There’s nothing else to do so why don’t you use this as your free time.”

You went to sit down on the corner meant for student librarians like you as you do what Ms. Kim has instructed you and it isn’t quick before you get fully immersed again in reading until you notice that you have a few pages left before the book ends.

“Ms. Kim, has the sequel for this book got returned already?” you asked, remembering how the book is supposed to be returned by now but you don’t recall putting it back on the shelf.

“Oh right”, Ms. Kim snapped her fingers as she remembered something, “I forgot to tell you it was returned last week.”

Getting up, you then proceeded to go to the fiction section where you instantly spotted the second book. You’re reading one of the most in demand book series today which is The Maze Runner. Since everyone’s been dying to borrow it, you took it out of the fiction section as you went at the far right end of the library where the Math section is located to hide it there just because no one really scans Math books anyway which makes it the perfect hiding spot.

As you were about to leave, you heard a knock coming from the back door of the library, causing you to furrow your brows at why would someone knock there when that door isn’t meant to be used since it leads to the fire exit. Regardlessly, you walk around the bookshelf covering the door only for you to discover something unusual.

A boy is crouched down in front of the door as he got an old newspaper from the pile next to him, slipping it under the door where it was pulled fastly as if there’s another person at the other side of the door. You were confused about what's happening until you started to piece out everything just when you recalled Namjoon’s announcement regarding the Paper Drive Project.

Holy shit, this must be the culprit who’s stealing newspapers for the project.

“Ms. Kim! I found the…” you shouted out, ready to snitch the boy who’s cheating their way in the project but you weren’t able to finish your sentence when the boy turned around with a quite startled look and next thing you know, he had his hand around your mouth to shut you up, eventually pinning you against the bookshelf in the process. 

“Y/N…?” the boy in front of you sighed, removing his hand from you to place it instead on top of his chest.

“Jimin?” you bewilderedly looked at him with so many questions running around your head as you look over the pile of newspapers and then back at him, “Are you...the one stealing newspapers?” you asked, lowering your voice as you said the last part.

Before Jimin could answer you, he went back to the door to knock on it two times as if he’s sending some sort of a signal to someone from the other side. Jimin ran his hands along his hair only for him to pull it from frustration whilst he had his other hand rested on his waist with a quite stressed look.

“You’re not going to report me, are you?” Jimin glanced up at you with a worrisome look.

“I don’t know?” you stammered as you try to process everything.

Of course, he forgot that you’re a student librarian and it’s obviously your job to report instances like this but a part of him is confident that you won’t snitch him just because you’re in the same class and you both know that you don’t want the class to get eliminated from the project though he could only hope you’re thinking the same thing as him.

“Um, I guess i need to explain” Jimin grabbed your hand to drag you out behind the bookshelf as he guided you both towards the rows of tables and chairs but your attention was called before you could even settle on your seats.

“Y/N? What happened?” 

Well, you thought you’re being so clever to find out the culprit only for you to end up digging your own grave or let’s just say a mass grave for your class because what are you supposed to say to Ms. Kim? That you find the newspaper thief who happens to be Jimin? 

No,you can’t do that - you can’t risk your class not when the pool party is at stake here.

You should probably think of a lie right now but what’s worse is that you’re a very bad liar and that’s a fact but you should put your best into saying something that’ll make sense. You’re way too deep making up a lie in your head that Jimin had to squeeze your hand - that is surprisingly still holding his - when he noticed you’re taking way too long to answer.

“Ah i found the sequel” you nervously laughed as you pointed your hand swiftly towards the Math section, too swiftly that your hand almost slammed into Ms. Kim’s face who’s clearly startled by your sudden movement, causing you to bite your lip in embarrassment.

God, I’m so awful.

“I was looking for it in the fiction section and it’s - Sorry, i just got excited...i guess” you stopped yourself from rambling, not trusting yourself that you might spew out some nonsense and make yourself more obvious. 

“Alright but remember the rule” she eyed the acrylic banner on the wall that says ‘Please Keep Quiet.’

“Yes, Ms. Kim and I’m sorry again” 

Ms. Kim smiled at the both of you as she left, leaving Jimin to tug you towards the table that’s the farthest from the occupied ones and you are once again reminded of your still intertwined hands that you’ve unknowingly been holding on to ever since you caught him at the back of the library.

As you both sat down side by side, you cleared your throat awkwardly as you tried to unclasp your hand from Jimin who quickly detached your hand from his as he muttered an apology.

“Thank you for not telling,” Jimin muttered as he intertwined both of his hands instead on top of the table but he was suddenly taken aback with the tone of your voice when you spoke up.

“You could’ve been in so much trouble only if it weren’t for me! What would you do if you were caught by someone else!?” you whispered shout as you voiced out your frustration but more so because you’re still stuck in a state of disbelief that Jimin did this and it looks like there must’ve been a glitch in the system for him to be the culprit.

“Well, I guess, I’m lucky you caught me,” Jimin said as he tried to gauge your previous reaction, not really expecting for you to go off on him.

“That’s not the point. I mean, why do you have to steal those newspapers?” you can’t decipher why he needs to risk the class by stealing when there are good various suggestions made by your classmates awhile ago for you to win.

“I’m not stealing, I’m recycling them” Jimin stated out, causing you to furrow your brows even further at his dumb sounding statement, “Look, do you want to have the pool party or not?”

“I do, as much as everyone else” Jimin pointed at you, thinking he got his point across when you’re in fact still a bit lost.

Jimin then began to explain to you that this plan started after the end of the second quarter when your class placed first for the project and everyone looked joyous at the achievement. That specific moment sparked some kind of pride in him hence the reason why he felt the need to win the project for the class.

“Why newspapers though? Why not cardboard boxes, don’t they weigh heavier?”

“Yes, cardboard boxes are heavier but newspapers are being printed daily and they become pretty much useless the next day” Jimin glanced back towards the back of the library before continuing, “There are newspapers there dated five years ago. Why just keep them there when you can recycle them, right?”

Jimin quirked his brows along with a mischievous smile and you could swear that you feel like he’s being such a villain yet a hero at the same time - a Robin Hood of some sorts when he got you convinced by his statement right then and there.

“You’re not the only one on this plan, are you?” you narrowed your eyes as you remember how the newspaper was fastly pulled out as soon as he slipped it under the door.

“Taehyung and Minjae as well but i hope you won’t tell this to your friends or the class since you know, it could be risky and the fewer, the better”

“Okay” you sighed as you got up, ready to leave to go back to the circulation desk but Jimin is a bit discontented with your answer as he’s still perplexed if he could really trust you not to tell everyone.

“Wait” Jimin held your arm, making you sit back down “Do you think it would be smart to have another one in?”

“What do you mean?”

“I just realized that you can be my lookout and since you’re the student librarian, that automatically makes you the least suspicious one to be doing this”

“Like an inside job?” you gave Jimin a deadpan look because if you agree, you could be at risk of losing your extra credits and potentially ruin your credentials if you were caught by chance but on the other note, the pool party is too tempting.

“If you like to call it that way. So is it a deal?” Jimin cheekily smiled, leaning forward to you with his hand held out under the table.

You didn’t contemplate it too much because next thing you know, you grabbed his hand to seal the deal.

--

You were out of focus as soon as you heard your stomach grumble, too hungry to even process the discussion about the difference between Ionic Bond and Covalent Bond in Chemistry. As if the gods were in your favor, you looked at the clock above the whiteboard to see that there’s five minutes left before lunch time.

Bored as wits, you pushed down on your click pen as you synchronized it with the ticking movement of the second hand of the clock but it looks like Sora’s not too pleased at what you were doing as she snatched the pen away from your hold.

“Stop, it’s annoying” Sora hissed.

“I’m hungry” you grumbled, regretting it now that you skipped breakfast and recess just because you told yourself that you’re going to take your diet seriously now but it looks like you can’t even make it through your first day.

“What did I tell you? Skipping meals is unhealthy.”

“It’s called intermittent fasting” you reminded Sora as you huff, laying your back against your chair, still looking at the time that seems to be slower than ever so you decided to observe your classmates in the room.

Half the students at the back were either sleeping or chatting up with their seatmate while those who are in front are too engrossed in the lesson whilst you in the middle seems to be caught in between the mood of those who are at the front and back.

Your eyes then remained to the person on the right side of the room who’s seating one row ahead of you, realizing that it has been a week already since you caught him stealing newspapers at the back of the library. 

Also, it has been a week when you became part of the plan though you still have not done your job of being a look out since you suggested to Jimin that you need to wait for at least a week for the issue to die down before you could continue. 

You have mutually agreed that you could only steal the newspapers once or twice a week with no particular day since having a pattern could get you caught plus you still have to do your job of being a student librarian.

But that’s not what you have in mind right now because you’re stuck in admiring Jimin’s face and observe how he has such a perfectly nice jaw yet he has such cute fluffy cheeks that you’d want to squish and bite if given the chance because look at him, he looks like such a warm rice cake served every new year.

You snapped out of your weird thoughts that are definitely caused by your hunger and thankfully, the bell rang just as you glanced back towards the clock, causing you to immediately stand up as you rushed towards the door but your attention was called before you could make it outside.

You looked at the source to see Jimin raised his eyebrows at you, taking the hint that today’s going to be the first time you’ll be executing the plan with them and you’re painfully nervous for it that you only even spent twenty minutes out of your allotted thirty minutes lunch time before you got yourself in the library.

Thankfully, Ms. Kim’s always lenient with you and you don’t have that much task to do today besides stapling twenty sets of papers. After that, you headed straight towards the back of the library to meet Jimin who’s sitting on the floor as he patiently waited for you and once you’re back there, he began to slip the newspapers under whilst you stayed behind the bookshelf as you peeked outside in between the spaces.

“Do you know the reason why the council was able to find out about the stolen newspapers” you asked as you looked back on Jimin who’s busy slipping the newspapers under the door whilst he’s crouching down.

“Why?”

“It’s because the school seal is stamped at the back.”

Jimin paused for a moment to look at the back of the newspaper to confirm your statement and sure enough, the school seal is there to straight up remind him how dumb he must’ve been to not notice it.

“So you better remove that page before you put it in the paper drive” you said.

“See, this is the reason why it’s smart to have you in” you shook your head, smiling as you went back to looking outside.

“I think it’d be also good if you could switch your place with Taehyung or Minjae to not raise suspicion” 

“Okay, then we’ll do that”

Since there are only a few students inside the library, you sat down on the floor with your crossed ankles and your right shoulder against the bookshelf. Your position right now has given you a perfect view of Jimin discarding his blazer at the moment, leaving him only with his buttoned up white shirt but not only that, he also rolled up the sleeves up to his elbows as if that isn't such a sight to look at.

Jimin may be facing his back to you but this is enough for you to get a good view of his physique but then you should really stop these inappropriate thoughts. 

As if Jimin sensed you watching him, he’s just right in time to catch you in the act of gawking at him that made you straight out bashful as you try to look anywhere but him.

“Are you tired?” 

“Just a bit” you twisted your body so you could direct your gaze through the gaps of the bookshelf whilst you busy your hands as you pressed your palms down on your legs to act as if they’re hurting though you’re more likely just fizzing out your embarrassment.

It was silent after that and it just made things awkward, specifically for you as you try to think of a topic you could talk about since you and Jimin are not close to begin with, maybe just an acquaintance. 

You were racking your brain for some ideas until your eyes wandered over the Math Section, “You’re good at Calculus, right?”

“I think i just take it in well” 

You let out a little huff as soon as you heard his humble remark, “You always get the highest scores in exams.” The compliment made Jimin shy as he smiled in a way that made his eyes turn into little crescents, making him look so undeniably adorable.

“What about you?” 

“I suck at Math” you chuckled, “I’m pretty good at History though since i could memorize the dates or details pretty easily.”

“Well, i suck at History so that makes us fair”

Jimin knocked on the door twice, once he slipped the last newspaper as he dusted off his hand before sitting down with his back against the door and is now facing you, “I could teach you Calculus if you want.” 

“Huh?” The offer came out of nowhere and it was so sudden, causing you to raise your eyebrows at him in surprise.

“I mean, we have a test on Calculus this Thursday” Jimin said as he looked at you, waiting for your response but he was met with none, “If you just want help is all.”

You don’t have to say anything for Jimin to figure out that you were not interested at all and he regrets it now that his statement might have sounded too forward for you so he stood up, unrolling his sleeves as he grabbed the blazer off of the floor as quickly as possible.

“Yeah, sure” you stood up as well, straightening down your skirt as you watch Jimin halt his movements. 

You don’t even know why you got nervous for a moment when Jimin just asked if he could help you in Calculus but your mind sure does have a way of thinking that maybe he’s making a move on you when in reality he’s just being the kind person he is.

“Oh okay, does after class sound good?” Jimin’s voice peeked a little at your answer.

“I still have to go here after class though.”

“I could go here then we could also study here, is that okay?” 

You think your heart just skipped a little after hearing that but you composed yourself as you nodded at him but you think your heart skipped for the second time when he smiled to display once again those cute little crescented eyes that you so began to adore just now.

--

Sora twirled the blue ribbon from your ponytail around her fingers as she watch how focused you are in writing down the notes for your last subject whilst her attention is the total opposite from you, too eager for the class to be dismissed so you could now both go to the mall to eat out and do some window shopping.

“Where do you want to eat?” you stopped writing, head turning sideways as you raised your eyebrows until it dawned on you that you have agreed to go to the mall with her last week and it must’ve totally slipped your mind hence why you’re giving her now an apologetic look.

“Can we go tomorrow instead? I kind of need to study today”

“Study with Jimin?” you playfully rolled your eyes, ignoring her question as you went back to write, “What’s with you and Jimin?” 

“Nothing”

“Well, you sure do spend a lot of time together lately” Sora is in fact not lying when she said that. Not only were you just getting the archived newspapers at the library but your after class study sessions have become a daily routine for you two ever since last week.

You understood Calculus much better now and thanks to Jimin’s help that you’re now able to get higher scores in your quizzes and you must say that he’s equally doing good in History too because as it turns out, you discovered that Jimin retains the details much better when someone is quizzing him.

“Normally, i’d be pissed you forgot our mall date but i’ll let you pass since we’re talking about your lovelife here.”

“Sora” you warned, getting annoyed at her constant teasing.

“What? I have a feeling you’d end up with Jimin before the end of the school year” you scoffed at her oddly specific statement.

“And how could you be so sure about that?”

A piece of paper was placed on top of your notebook and upon seeing it, you immediately saw your full name and Jimin’s though it’s a bit incomprehensible to read because of how the common letters are crossed off for unknown reasons until you saw the word ‘FLAMES’ written on capital letters below your names and you could only glare at Sora when you saw where the circle landed on - L for Lovers.

“What are you? A middle schooler?” you soon burst into a chuckle, finding the whole thing ridiculous.

“FLAMES never fails, trust me” you shook your head as you went on to pack your things once you heard the bell ring.

“I’m sorry Sora, See you tomorrow then” you waved, slinging your backpack over your shoulder.

“You better not forget it” Sora accusedly pointed at you, chuckling as you nodded your head as you went out of the classroom.

You stopped by your locker first to stuff in your things except for your Calculus book and notes since Jimin will be teaching you about Limits on Combined Functions for today.

Arriving first in the library, you then proceeded to finish your task for today which is to return books into their proper place. Thankfully, there were only four books that got returned, leaving you with pretty much nothing left for you to do after so you instead got yourself settled on one of the tables as you opened the textbook and scanned the notes you took that you barely understand anyway but might as well try.

“Hey” Jimin greeted you, sitting himself down next to you as he unzipped his backpack to get out his things, “Did you understand the lesson a while ago?”

Shaking your head, you give him an apologetic look, “Not so much.”

“That’s okay, I'll just explain it from the start” Jimin told you as the sweetheart he is. 

Opening the textbook, Jimin started to explain the lesson a while ago with no difficulty as he constructed graphs and wrote out the solutions so you could see the step by step process. You’re thankful that he’s being so patient with you no matter how many questions you throw at him but he said that it’s good to be inquisitive than to be uninterested.

Once you finally get the gist of it, you find yourself staring lost at his face and watch how he looks so cool just talking about functions and their limits. How unfair is it that he doesn’t have to exert much effort to look so ethereal, no wonder he’s so good at catching everyone’s hearts.

So handsome.

Jimin suddenly looked at you with a smile forming on his face when he caught you looking at him and you panicked thinking that you might’ve voiced out your thoughts out loud but he’s looking at you as if he’s waiting for you to speak.

“Huh?”

Jimin smiled as he then pointed towards the parabola he constructed on the Cartesian Plane, “I said, What’s the f(g(-8))?”

“Oh um wait” you grabbed the paper from him as you analyzed the graph, “It’s 5.”

Jimin enthusiastically nodded his head, “It’s not so hard is it?” 

Your study session for Calculus went on as Jimin gave you five more exercise questions from the textbook before you called it a day once you proved that you understand the lesson when you answered all the questions right.

“Aren’t you going home yet?” Jimin asked as he stood up to push in his chair, backpack clinging into his shoulder.

“I still need to clean up a bit then I'm good to go” you told him as you picked up some crumpled papers under the table.

“I’ll help you”

“No, it’s fine” you dismissed him as you waved your hand no to him but he already removed his backpack as he helped you by aligning and fixing the tables and chairs. Knowing Jimin, he would persistently insist to help you no matter how many times you try to deny his offer so you just let him be as you went on to shut down the computers.

“Leave that, it’s fine” you chuckled when he was about to remove the trash bag from the bin, “Good bye, Ms. Kim!”

“Good bye” Ms. Kim waved to the both of you, “Oh and thank you Jimin for helping us clean.”

“No worries, Ms. Kim. Take care!” As you said your farewells, you and Jimin both descended down the stairs as you got out of the building.

It’s such a weird sight for the quadrangle to be this empty and you figured that you must’ve studied longer than the usual when you see the sky painted in hues of pink and orange that could only mean that the sun had already begun to set - it’s already quarter to six when you took a look on your wristwatch.

“Ah, I can't believe it's rush hour already” Jimin sighed once he saw how crammed the bus stop right beside your school is with everyone aggressively fighting for their way to get onto the bus quickly, “Do you want to go to 7-Eleven to past time?”

“Yeah, sure” It’s late anyway so what’s the difference with getting home later when you know that you’ll be standing at the bus stop for fifteen minutes or so before you could eventually get in a bus and go home.

The door chimes rang once you got inside the store with you heading straight towards the Slurpee machine to get yourself some Wild Cherry. Jimin followed suit as he got a cup for himself, placing it under the dispenser for Coke but what intrigued you the most is that he mixed it with Wild Cherry.

“Does that taste good?” you gave him a look of distaste as you watched him put the lid on his cup.

“Why don’t you try it for yourself” 

“My cup’s already full”

“Drink it, the attendant wouldn’t even see you” Jimin stood beside you to give you some cover and you took the chance to hurriedly sip on your slurpee which you kind of regret now that you got a brain freeze.

“Sometimes i think you’re just being nice so you could cancel out doing your little evil things” you chuckled as you mixed a quarter of Coke into your Wild Cherry. 

“Not really” Jimin smiled as you both lined up, “Do you want some snacks? It’s my treat.”

“See, you’re back to being nice again but you don’t have to, it’s okay” you said, opening your wallet to get some money but Jimin beat you to it when he handed the bill to the attendant.

“Think of it as my reward for you since you did pretty well on Calculus today.”

“Okay, thank you then” you smiled, walking over towards the seat and table by the window, you both sat down side by side, sipping on your mixed flavored Slurpees - which is surprisingly good -  as you watch the bus stop across from where you are.

“You sure you don’t want anything to eat?”

You shook your head, “It’ll be dinner time soon and my mom would scold me if i told her i’m full.”

“Well, same here” Jimin chuckled as he stopped eyeing the aisle of chips behind you, joining you instead in looking out the window.

“Who do you think will get on the bus first? Miss striped shirt girl or Mister black turtleneck?” you asked as you take interest towards the two figures standing in front, giving them an advantage to get in the bus quicker than the others.

“Wanna bet on it? You need to treat me the next time we’re here if i win.”

“Okay and if I win, you need to treat me again”,  you said, “I’ll pick Miss Striped Shirt”

Jimin stroked his chin as he think of something to say about the man, “I think Mister Turtleneck will let Miss Striped Shirt go in first just because he dresses like a gentleman to me”

You scoffed, “Chivalry doesn’t exist when it’s rush hour, specially when everyone is equally itching to go home.” 

“Let’s see and wait” and so you did with full seriousness as you put both of your arms on the table, still sipping on your slurpee as you keep your eyes focused on the two of them until a bus arrived, blocking your view of Miss Striped Shirt and Mister Turtleneck completely thus you wait until you can fully see again the bus stop.

“What do you want?” you spoke defeatedly as soon as Miss Striped Shirt disappeared, leaving behind Mister Turtleneck on the bus stop.

“This same Slurpee and a Jjapaghetti.”

“Fine.”

“Oh and some hot bar too and maybe -”

“Hey! you’re milking it” you argued whilst you pushed his shoulders albeit playfully.

Jimin laughed, standing up as he readjusted his backpack and throwing out the now empty red cup into the bin, “Let’s go, it’s getting dark.”

And that’s how your daily study sessions in the library also turned into daily food trips across the 7-Eleven in front of your school while you wait for the rush hour to die down, betting on people at bus stops as you drink on Slurpees and snack on convenience store food finds that is sometimes treated by you or Jimin - depends on the winner of the last bet.

Slowly, you’ve come to learn that rush hours are not so bad after all.

--

It’s lunch time and you’re supposed to be at the back of the library but you’re stuck behind the circulation desk this time as you were told to cut up evaluation forms which means that Jimin is left to fend for himself though you’ve warned him to be cautious for the time being you’re not there to be his look out.

Letting out a hiss, you dropped the scissors as you pressed your fingers on the red spot that appeared along the base of your thumb and index finger, relieving them from hand fatigue. If it had not been for the broken paper cutter, you would’ve been done by now but it just had to be broken when you needed it the most - how cruel this world is.

You didn’t let the sound of the door opening bother you but you were able to make out the conversation between the student and Ms. Kim for your ears to perk up. The student is asking her for an Accounting Book - not sure why she’s looking for it but Ms. Lee answered her with delight as she pointed out that it’s in the Math Section.

Math Section.

Those two words are enough for you to drop what you’re doing as you leaned backwards in your chair, taking a good glimpse of who this student is and to your surprise, she just happens to belong in Namjoon’s class.

Before you could interject to say that you’ll look it up for her, she left as she walked straight further down at the back of the library, causing you to stand up as you briskly follow her footsteps but she just seems to be much quicker than you now that she’s halfway through.

Gladly, she stopped from walking as she looked over the voice that called her name. She waved to the group of students seated on a table as she first made her way to them which is enough for you to buy some time and go towards the back of the library to remind Jimin.

“Someone’s coming over here” you whispered as you tapped on Jimin’s shoulder.

“Who?”

“I don’t know but she’s in Namjoon’s class” you told him frantically but Jimin rather looks way too relaxed as he still continuously slips out newspapers, “Come on, let’s go before we get caught.”

“Just a few more.” 

“Jimin, I think that’s enough already” you’ve seen way too many movies or documentaries about thievery or such for you to know that most of them goes unsuccessful because they’re being greedy at the last minute when they could’ve made it if they just chose to let some of it go. 

Well, you could only hope that it won’t happen to the both of you.

“Two newspapers and i’m done” you huffed as you let him be, seeing that Namjoon’s classmate is still talking with those students.

You continue to peer through the spaces of the shelf until Jimin alerts you with bad news, “Shit, it’s stuck.”

“Push it” you looked back to see that Jimin managed to insert a bunch of newspapers in one go, making it impossible for the newspaper to go through the other side no matter how much he pushed it with his hands.

Abandoning your position by the shelf, you went to the door as you kicked the newspaper forcefully but it wouldn’t budge so you lower your head down by the space under the door to give out a message. 

“Taehyung, pull it out harder.”

“Why won’t it go through!?” Jimin whispered in frustration as he continued to push it whilst you just stared at him with an annoyed expression when he should have listened to you in the first place but this is no place for you to argue so you just stood up as you went back behind the shelf.

Panic settled in within you once again when you saw Namjoon’s classmate gone on the table and now see that she’s making her way towards the Math Section. 

“She’s coming! Hurry!” you whispered and looked back to see that there was no progress for the stuck newspaper, making you lose your mind as your anxiety picked up because getting out of the place is surely not a viable option for you anymore, not when she’s too close in your area.

“Fuck! What do we do now!?” Jimin’s hair is messed up with how many times he mindlessly ran his fingers through it.

“I don’t know, just pull it back inside” you clutched both of your hands on the shelf, causing a book to fall with a thud, cursing yourself when Namjoon’s classmate looked at your direction and you swear you wanted to cry right then and there when she instead took the path towards where you’re hiding.

“Oh shit, she’s going here” you try to think of any lie to save your asses but you can’t come up with anything and this might be the end of it - Karma finally managed to catched up to chew on you both and you could now only bid your farewell towards the pool party you’ve all dreamed to have.

You heaved, finally accepting your demise when you suddenly heard the two knocks coming off of the back door but before you could even process it. A pair of hands grabbed you by the shoulders, turning you around so swiftly that made you step back to regain your balance until your back hit against the shelf.

There’s a little to no space between you and Jimin but that space was soon closed off when Jimin leaned dangerously close to your face and you didn’t have enough time to ask what he was doing when you felt a pair of lips against yours, taking your breath away completely.

You’re not entirely sure what’s happening right now or maybe your mind cannot wrap around the fact that Jimin is kissing you right now and holding you so close with his hand placed on your waist whilst the other is on your neck.

Instinctively, you flutter your eyes shut as you place your hand on his shoulders, kissing him back and it must’ve caught Jimin off guard when you felt his body suddenly get tense and how his hold on your waist tightened a bit. 

You can hear the sound of your rapid heartbeat through your ears and you’re quite clueless if it happens to be coming off from the adrenaline or right in this exact moment but just as you were getting into it, your thoughts were then interrupted by an audible gasp coming from your side.

“Oh um...sorry.”

You broke the kiss, head turning to the side to conceal your face away from the person who just caught you two kissing. You let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding in the beginning as your mind wandered at the fact that Jimin’s arm is still around you, keeping you close as ever.

You gently pushed Jimin’s shoulder to create some distance between you two because you’re quite not sure if your heart could bear more this kind of intimacy that felt so foreign yet felt so good at the same time and you don’t know what to make out of this situation.

What the hell just happened.

Stunned, you touch your still tingling lips with your fingers as you try to process everything. You’d actually thought you were going to be caught but you totally weren’t expecting that you’d end up kissing Jimin or how you actually didn’t expect for this to be your first kiss even.

Glancing up, you were immediately met with Jimin’s eyes but you instantly avoided his stare as you tried to look elsewhere other than him as awkwardness began to slowly fill in the air. It must’ve looked like Jimin’s dumbfounded with what just happened too as he started to act fidgety just like you do.

“You uh have something there” you broke the silence as you pointed to the corner of his mouth where you could perfectly see the pink stain that came from your tinted lip balm. Jimin glided his tongue along his lips before he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

The awkwardness remained when Jimin refused to talk, leaving you to move your feet quickly as you tried to escape out of there but you didn’t have the chance when Jimin suddenly grabbed your hand, holding you back in place. 

“Y/N, I’m - There’s no other way to explain why we’re here” Jimin said as he scratched the back of his neck.

Well, that’s a fair point because honestly, it’s more reasonable for two students to be caught making out at the back of the library than to be caught stealing archived newspapers except that the former sounds way too controversial but do you really have a choice back there?

“Um yeah, at least we’re not caught” you chuckled and you cringe at how forced it sounds.

“Yeah” Jimin muttered that’s barely above a whisper. It’s definitely getting more awkward here so you take this as a cue to leave again.

“I have to go back” you eyed Jimin’s hand that’s still holding you, “you know, to cut up some forms.”

“Right, yeah” Jimin chuckled as he loosened his hold around your wrist to pick up his blazer off the floor instead, “Um are we good?”

“Yeah, of course” you reassured him with a smile as you finally met his gaze.

Walking back, your smile completely faltered as you thought about how Jimin believed you right there when in fact you’re still a bit unsure for yourself if things could go back to normal after this but it looks like you must’ve improved in telling lies and you don’t know if this is something you should be proud of. 

--

Lowering down your book, you take a glimpse of the surroundings around you and your gut feeling is right to tell you that someone is staring at you or should you say that everyone is staring at you unsubtly. 

“Is there something on my face?” you asked Sora as you closed your book to put it down the table, making everyone look away as they go back into their own worlds. 

“You have a new pimple on your chin” Sora pointed out to you using her chopsticks before picking another piece of Gimbap to chew on. 

That isn’t surely something for everyone to look at but you have a bad feeling that this has something to do with the kiss you shared with Jimin yesterday but could news really be that fast to spread out? 

“Anyway, i need to get going” 

As you walk to exit the cafeteria, you try to keep your head down, feeling extra conscious today with everyone’s attention on you and that is something you hated - to be the center of attention.

When you got yourself inside the library, you went inside the circulation desk to sit on your corner as you grabbed the scissors to finish up the remaining forms but your movement was halted when a hand was placed on top of your shoulder.

“Y/N, how are you feeling today?” Ms. Lee said with a lace of concern in her voice.

You were confused for a moment until you recalled that you excused yourself for your after class duties in the library yesterday, telling her that your dog had just died even though you clearly don’t even have a pet at home.

“I’m fine, still a bit sad is all” 

“I’m sorry again for your loss but it’ll get better day by day” Ms. Lee rubbed her hand on your back before she went back to her seat, leaving you to continue your task.

Honestly, you’ve made up that excuse just so you could go home right away and not meet Jimin for your study session in fear of facing him. You just can’t control being shy or an awkward mess around Jimin after the kiss hence the reason why you try your best to avoid him in all places as much as possible to save you from embarrassment but you can’t help but be curious about one thing.

“Was Jimin here yesterday after class?” you asked.

“Oh yes, he was actually looking for you so i had to relay the news to him if you don’t mind.”

You smiled, nodding your head in understanding but there’s also one thing you’re curious about, “Did he stay here to study?”

Ms. Lee hummed, “He even helped me to clean the library before I closed it down, such a good friend you have”

“Yeah, he is” you mumbled, feeling bad that you stood him up and how childish it is of you to avoid him just because you really don’t like confrontations. You’re just trying to compose your thoughts and feelings before you could muster the courage to face him is what you like to prefer what you’re actually doing.

Before you could delve into it too much, the ringing sound of the landline phone distracted you. Ms. Lee then tapped you on the shoulders, telling you if you could attend to the student in front of her whilst she answered the call.

“Hi, how may i help you?” you asked as you sat down on Ms. Lee’s chair.

“I’d like to check out these books please.”

“Please scan your I.D.” you instructed whilst you typed in the necessary details but you can’t help but notice how she whispered something to her friend who’s right beside her but you were only able to coherently hear the word ‘ribbon.’

You lifted your head only to be able to meet her widened eyes as she frantically blurted out a question to you, “Your ribbon looks nice, where’d you get that?”

You touch the ends of the blue ribbon wrapped around your ponytail, a bit skeptical for her sudden enthusiasm about the ribbon when it’s plainly just an ordinary thing and can be commonly found almost everywhere but you gave her an answer nonetheless.

“I bought it in a department store” you politely smiled as you handed her borrowed books.

“Ah it’s very pretty” she gathered her books off the desk, smiling at you, “thank you!”

You suspiciously looked at the girl as she left the library but shrugged it off completely, thinking you’re just being too paranoid and she’s just genuinely curious to know about your ribbon.

There’s no way this is about you and Jimin.

Lunch break flew by in a matter of seconds because next thing you know, you’re sitting inside the classroom once again, taking down notes about the Joseon Dynasty when you noticed Sora looking at you in your peripheral vision.

“What?” you asked. Normally, you’d just ignore her but it bothers you that she’s evidently looking at you the way everyone has been doing since this morning.

Sora lifted her fingers as she gingerly twirled your blue ribbon around her fingers, “You never told me you weren’t just studying with Jimin.”

“What do you mean?” you leaned closer, hoping that she won’t say the exact same thing you’re thinking about. 

“Well, according to the news spreading around. Jimin was seen in the back of the library making out with a girl wearing a blue ribbon around her ponytail”

Oh no.

So you weren’t being delusional after all but you guessed it right that news about you and Jimin has spread like wildfire around the campus judging by everyone’s looks and how the girl from the library awhile ago isn’t actually curious about your ribbon but she was particularly playing to be interested because you happen to be the mystery girl involved in the school gossip.

“And everyone thinks it’s me?” you scoffed.

“It’s a very specific detail and it perfectly describes you plus all i know, your hair has always been styled like that ever since middle school.”

You were about to get more defensive that is until a sudden loud thud caught you by surprise, making everyone in the class direct their attention in front to discover that Mr. Song apparently slammed the textbook against the teacher’s table on purpose.

“Ms. Yun and Y/L/N, would you like to share your conversation with the class?”

In a matter of seconds, everyone’s eyes turned towards the both of you and you could never wish more for the floor to swallow you whole. 

“I’m sorry” you meeked with Sora following after you.

“I’m sure everyone is interested to hear whatever you’re talking about, right class?” Mr. Song chuckled and you swear you’re so close to tearing up because your teacher has to downright embarrass you in front of everyone as if today’s events aren’t the worst for you. 

Biting your lip, you remained silent as your shaking eyes scanned to look at your classmates and you’re just thankful they didn’t find Mr. Song’s statement to be humorous at all as their face remained stoic or they’re just too intimidated to speak up. 

Coincidentally, your gaze fell on Jimin who offered you an apologetic smile and you can’t say that the gesture comforted you a little bit though you didn’t explicitly show it to him as you quickly diverted your eyes back on the floor.

“I won’t endure this kind of behavior again, is this clear for everyone?” Mr. Song sternly looked at the both of you before he continued the discussion.

You slumped on your seat as you put your hand against your temple. Sighing, you picked up your pen, trying your best to diligently take down notes despite your worsened mood and as you remembered your conversation with Sora, you loosened the blue ribbon around  your ponytail, letting your hair cascade down your face for the first time ever in school.

--

You can’t believe you find yourself at the back of the library again despite how the place has gone controversial for you because of the school gossip but you remind yourself that you’re only here because this is going to be the last time you’ll play your part as the lookout since the winner for the project will be announced at the flag ceremony on Monday.

Obviously, you’re not with Jimin this time but with Taehyung. It has been a week and you’re still avoiding Jimin who’s still consistently trying to get you to talk with him. He would constantly send you messages but you never click on it to view it or how he would still go to the library after class even though you won’t show up.

All those efforts made by him eventually stop after you have ignored him for four days - he altogether didn’t send you messages anymore, he didn’t even come at the library after class, or how he would also ignore you whenever you pass by each other at the classroom or the hallways which eventually made the gossip rapidly die` down when everyone seemed to not believe it with the way you were acting around each other.

You would say you started to feel bad for avoiding him but you just don’t know how to approach him. It’s so easy for you to tell yourself to act normal but you always chicken out whenever you try to come near him and apologize because there has been one thing you’ve realized.

You’re crushing really hard on Jimin.

“Which cram school are you going to this summer?” Taehyung asked you, snapping you out of your thoughts.

Oh right, summer’s coming and that means you have to get yourself into a cram school by the end of the school year to prepare for college entrance examinations and it looks like you were too preoccupied with other things to forget about this.

You pick on the loose thread at the end of your skirt, twisting it around your fingers before you pull on it to remove it, “I don’t know, I still haven’t looked around, what about you?” 

“Same here but i think i’ll go with whatever Jimin picks.” 

With the mention of Jimin’s name, you looked back on Taehyung who knocked on the door twice before he sat down on the floor to face you. Taehyung has never mentioned to you about the gossip before, thinking that maybe he’s just clueless to what’s happening or he’s just minding his own business.

“Speaking of”, maybe he’s not clueless after all,  ''What university are you planning to go to?”

You chuckled, thinking he would bring up Jimin, “Seoul National University, I hope.”

“Oh wow, it’s hard to get in there” Taehyung exclaimed and you thought that maybe you sounded way too ambitious.

“I was just hoping for it but you’ll never know. What about you?”

“I was hoping for Seoul National University too but i don’t think i’ll get in there so i’m fine with wherever i’m accepted” Taehyung said it like it isn’t much of a big deal to him though it’s clear that he’s serious in talking about it and surprisingly, you’ve never seen Taehyung act so seriously until now.

“You’re smart, Taehyung”, you assured him.

“You think? I mean, I have good grades this year and it’s all thanks to you.” 

“You’re just not serious about it now but i can tell you’re smart. I mean, you helped me on an English quiz before so you’ll never know, right?”

“I guess, thanks” Taehyung gave you a warm smile.

You continue to talk with Taehyung for the rest of your lunchtime and you eventually talked about the Project Paper Drive that’s coming off to an end today. Time surely does fly by quickly when you felt like it was only yesterday when you joined the plan and all you have to do now is wait for Monday to come to hear the results.

It’ll be a truly joyous moment if your class happens to win and have a year end pool party like what everyone is dreaming of but it’ll be disappointing if you happen to lose after all the efforts you’ve done for it.

As Monday rolled in, you’ve never been this excited or nervous to hear what Namjoon has to say about the results but as usual, you’re impatiently waiting once again for the school principal to finish her ‘short speech’.

The weather is beginning to feel hot which is very much the opposite back to Namjoon’s last announcement during the third quarter. Speaking of the devil, Namjoon has finally made his way towards the platform with the final result on his hand.

“Good Morning! I guess you all know that i am here to announce the winner for Project Paper Drive but before i could do so, i would like to thank everyone for participating and getting involved in helping the environment. All in all, we have accumulated a total of 328 kilos worth of recyclables.”

“Do you think we’ll win?” Sora asked you.

You nodded your head as you crossed your fingers, eyes closing as you whispered repeatedly the name of your section - your class is going to win and everyone will be having a pool party. You’re claiming it already because that’s how the law of attraction works.

“And the winner for Project Paper Drive is…” Namjoon unfolded the paper as he read out the result.

“Class 3-2!” 

“Class 4-1!”

You whispered at the same time as Namjoon announced the winner but the roaring screams didn’t come from your line. Looking to your right, you see Class 4-1 jumping with joy as everyone hugged and cheered for each other whilst you looked back to your class to see everyone looking defeated, specially when you looked over at Taehyung, Minjae, and Jimin.

I guess, karma finally managed to catched up to you this time.

Once you all got back to the classroom, half of the class are quiet whilst the other half are conspiring against Class 4-1 for cheating the results when ironically, it was your class who had done it yet you didn’t even manage to win.

“Hey, you okay?” you looked back at Taehyung on your seat.

“No because why do we only get a chocolate bar for each person as the second prize?” you complained as you break a piece of chocolate to pop it in your mouth.

“A pizza party would’ve been nice huh?” Taehyung broke a piece from yours but he already ate it when you swatted his hand away.

“Hey! Eat your own” Taehyung chuckled, turning a deaf ear as he broke another piece from yours to feast on.

“How about we get to have our own pizza party for the class then we could also have our own but it’s just me, you, Jimin and Minjae - can’t let out efforts go in vain”

“Go tell it to Jimin then” you said but it kind of sounded spiteful the moment the words came out of your mouth though you don’t intentionally mean it that way.

“You tell him”, Taehyung gave you a knowing look as he raised his eyebrows in a teasing manner, breaking another piece from your chocolate again despite the cold glare you’re sending him.

“I guess, you don’t need my Chemistry homework then” you grabbed your paper off of Taehyung’s table but he stole it from you just in time.

“Alright, fine i’m sorry” Taehyung laughed, licking his fingers that are covered with chocolate before he grabbed his pen to do his homework.

It dawned on Taehyung that you and Jimin are not on speaking terms because of how you always divert the topic to another one whenever Jimin’s mentioned and that goes the same with Jimin as well. 

There’s just something about it that makes the whole situation between you both amusing for him because he might be clueless at times but it’s not that hard for him to figure out that there’s clearly something going on between you two yet you’re just too stupid or maybe too stubborn to recognize and talk about it.

--

Final examinations are next week and you have trouble in keeping up with the new lessons in Calculus but no matter how many Youtube videos you’ve watched at home to help yourself, you just don’t seem to get it. It doesn’t look easy at all compared with the way Jimin's teaching it to you and that’s enough to frustrate you.

You let out a sigh as you lay your head down on top of your Calculus textbook, giving up from trying to understand it as you instead blow out puffs of air towards the pencil you place in between the pages, watching as it rolled back and forth towards your face and the middle of the book.

Looking over the expanse of the library, you noticed how you’re the only one remaining in the study area just because it’s already closing time and the reason you’re still here is because you still have to study more and help Ms. Lee in closing down the library.

You were then brought out of your state of staring into nothingness when the pencil hit your nose along with the sound of the doors opening, making you turn your head to the other side to see who’s this student that managed to get in here beyond closing hours.

You immediately scrambled into your seat as you sat up straight, bewildered at the sight of the unexpected guest as he went towards the circulation desk to talk to Ms. Lee and you hope that he’s just here to have some nice little chit chat.

What is Jimin even doing here anyway?

You thought it was clear that he has given up trying to reach you after his many attempts but he’s here, standing a few meters away from you. If anyone’s watching you right now, you looked honestly ridiculous for panicking as you try to search for exit points within the library just in case Jimin will come over in this area. 

But then, maybe you’re just too quick to think things that he’s here for you and you just need to come off your high horse and stop thinking that the world revolves around you. You just wish that you could get rid of these feelings so you could stop being awkward around him but it seems like that will not happen any sooner.

Panic sure fully settled in when you saw Ms. Lee’s hand pointed towards your direction, causing you to instinctively remove yourself off the seat as you walked towards the nearest bookshelf to hide yourself.

It’s a disadvantage that you can’t see past the bookshelf to see what Jimin is going to do which just makes you more anxious and maybe it’s better to stay here until it’s time for the library to close. You’re just going to organize the books for the meanwhile to set off your panic state.

“Hey”

Why? 

You whispered to yourself with your eyes closed as you recognized the voice to be Jimin’s. Sucking in a deep breath, you reminded yourself to just be normal and stop acting so scared all the time when there’s nothing to even worry about - a lie but you’ll just pretend it’s not until your brain believes it to be true.

“Jimin”, you smiled as best as you could muster, “What are you doing here?”

“Can you help me study History? I mean, we have a quiz for it tomorrow and finals are approaching but it’s fine-”

“Okay” you cut him off from rambling as you walked past him and sat down where you were sitting just a while ago, thinking you should start right away so it could also end right away.

Jimin followed you as he then sat down next to you, handing you the reviewer you sent to him weeks ago. You scan through it to find that he highlighted the important details and color coded it just like what you suggested to him before and you don't know why that made you feel a bit giddy inside. 

In your peripheral vision, you can see that Jimin has his body facing towards you as if having him near you isn’t nerve wracking at all. You tried your best to compose yourself, focusing solely on the reviewer as you then read out the first sentence to quiz him.

“It was the last dynasty of Korea and the longest ruling Confucian dynasty.”

“Joseon Dynasty.”

“He was the fourth king of the Joseon Dynasty and the one who created Hangul”

“King Sejong.”

“What was the capital of Korea before the Joseon Dynasty started?”

The question isn’t actually hard at all considering you’ve been studying this topic since elementary school but it looks like Jimin’s mulling it over when you glanced at him once you noticed he’s been taking a while to answer.

“Sorry” Jimin muttered.

Clearing your throat, you then read the question more loudly just in case he didn’t heard it properly, “What was the capital of-”

“YN, I’m sorry”, Jimin said a bit more clearly, “I know that you don’t want me to be here since you’re probably mad at me but i just wanted to say that i’m sorry if the kiss made you uncomfortable and it wasn’t my intention to make you feel that way but i guess that’s too late for now and i understand if you truly hate me.”

“I don’t hate you”

“You don’t?”

“I’m sorry too for avoiding you but I was not doing it because I hate you” you momentarily looked at Jimin before you went back to look at the reviewer to fold it’s edges.

Are you really going to say the real reason?

You believe that Jimin’s just being nice as he is and you’re mistaking it for something else. Also, the kiss surely is nothing but only a cover up anyway so you figured that it’s best to let him know the real reason so that you could end your suffering quickly and move on from how you don’t stand a chance from him to begin with.

“I just feel awkward and I think that’s because” you lower down your head a bit so that you could perfectly hide your face behind your hair, “ I um...I like you.”

You whispered the last part, hoping he missed what you said though you know he had perfectly heard it - you’re in the most quiet place after all.

Jimin is probably used to hearing countless confessions made for him so this must be not a big of a deal for him but it sure is to you. You waited for a moment for him to say anything back and when you’re sure that he’s not going to open his mouth at all, you stood up as you quickly gathered your things.

“I guess, i have to go”

“Wait” Jimin grabbed your wrist, “Don’t run from me again.”

Jimin gently tugged you down, sitting you back in your place beside him. You were quiet as you idly stare straight ahead, not really knowing what you’re supposed to do now when you just want to get out of here, regretting the fact that you just confessed but Jimin’s hand is keeping you in place so it’s not like there’s no other way.

Suddenly, you got surprised as soon as you felt Jimin’s fingertips ghosting over your palm ever so slowly until he eventually slipped them in between the spaces of your fingers, completely intertwining your hands.

Could this mean that Jimin likes you too?

You looked up at Jimin to see him already staring at you with a sweet smile as he grazed his thumb up and down against your own. Flustered, you turned your head to the other side, biting down on your lip to contain your smile from getting bigger as you try to keep in mind to get a better hold on yourself.

As if the butterflies on your stomach couldn’t get any more wilder, Jimin then squeezed your hand three times and you guess that’s enough for your feelings to be reassured.

--

A/N: Hi! It’s been a while since i last posted and finally, i was able to finish this after procrastinating it multiple times and here you go hehe, hope you all like this! Anyway, how is the Dynamite comeback treating you all? Taehyung definitely had me dead with his ethereal beauty :(

[thelosthargreeves]

I wanna hear more about Diego not experiencing racism! Cause I thought that was weird too! And I think you can still speak on it you’re still a poc

Ok I don’t even know where to start with this because I have thoughts, as does my dad, so lemme start with a ty for the ask, anon–please feel free to send more unrelated ones or have me clarify on this! 

I myself have never experienced racial discrimination, but as I mentioned, my dad has–he was a Mexican immigrant to California in the 70s. We both agree that his story was an unrealistic representation of what a lot of people went through. My dad was a child and still faced racism in his own community for years after the 60s, so it is very unrealistic that a Latino man in the 60s wouldn’t. Again, I would never, EVER wish racism, prejudice, or discrimination on anybody but even if it had had no effect on Diego or his story, it still should’ve been included as a representation of what people experienced. My writing below is,,,a mess so bear with me I’m trying to summarize the convo with my dad (shoutout to my dad for some reason he was very eager to give thoughts on TUA).

I think a lot of it came down to the way the writers created Diego and handled his character. If we break him down to the bare essential tropes, he’s a hotheaded and aggressive man with daddy issues (which my dad also pointed out is a Latino stereotype). If he had faced racism, he would’ve no doubt reacted strongly and attacked/defended himself, which would’ve lead to a whole other subplot. 

I also think that a major hallmark of the show is that the siblings all lead different and disconnected lives as a result of their past but still have to come together for the end of the world. If there had been a shared experience between two of them, like Allison and Diego both experiencing racism, that would’ve broken up the whole “divided until united” plot. We repeatedly see the Hargreeves siblings unaware of what the others are doing, which leads to antics, to say the least, so to have two siblings unite on the front of civil rights/having their stories being disrupted by racism would mess up this dynamic and create too much of an indirect partnership.

I think that in season 3, we’ll most likely be seeing our Hargreeves siblings come together, so maybe the writers are saving the moments when they connect more until then.

I will say though, in reflection, Diego went through a few things that could be compared to the effects of racism, but never were and were treated as unrelated. If the writers had tied these events to racism, it could’ve at least acknowledged the struggles of Latinos, but they didn’t. For example, he was quickly arrested upon arrival to Dallas, for what the newspaper clipping described as “loitering”. A white man would practically never have gotten arrested for loitering, but Diego did. Of course, he had plenty of knives, but they weren’t all visible and were most likely discovered after his arrest. He’s literally brought to a mental asylum, no doubt prompted by said knives, but this is a pretty extreme reaction. I think that if the writers had made the effort to link these events to racism, they could’ve both created an accurate representation but also messed with their storyline, which is probably why they didn’t (does this make sense?)

Also, it’s entirely possible that the writers just,,,don’t know about the extent of racism against all BIPOC, which sounds ridiculous but could be possible. I know a lot of people who don’t know about the Latino rights pushes and Chicanx movements, so maybe they just weren’t aware altogether.

This isn’t me,,,attacking the show/writers in any way, since it’s absolutely my favorite show of all time lmao, but I think this is definitely something that needs to be talked about and I’m glad I was able to get input from someone who was basically in Diego’s shoes. In conclusion, stan my man Diego Hargreeves I love my himbo king.

[jupiteronic]

hi, i have pisces mars, how can i develop it? i suck

don’t do the whole “i suck” thing for starters. It’s hard ik especially for those of us who are mentally ill and/or went through trauma and have conditioned thoughts like these, but also it can be helpful to remind yourself that your thoughts do not define you and to redirect your thoughts rather than bully them away or blame yourself for them (let me know if you want resources on this!) so as to diminish later blowups/ guilt-tripping behaviours. a lot of Pisces mars people very much are willing to change their ways/ listen to other perspectives like you! telling people you suck doesn’t really come across as taking responsibility though, a lot of people will take offense to that - rightfully so - and think you’re being manipulative or simply looking for validation, acceptance or forgiveness. probably wasn’t your intention, it’s just important to think about how others would interpret our behavior. 

accept that feeling bad isn’t an excuse to avoid preemptively thinking about how your actions impact others, it takes practice but make a conscious effort and you’ll be surprised how much good you can do despite overwhelming emotions! in a similar vein though, do NOT ignore or repress or minimize your emotions for the sake of others. if anything that will lead to more uncontrolled anger, manipulative behavior, and self-pitying feelings/thoughts which further reinforce the unhealthy behaviours you’re trying to rid yourself of

BEWARE OF WHO YOU SURROUND YOURSELF WITH

if you can, avoid fixating on what you did wrong and feeling shame + guilt for it. focus on how you can improve or eliminate the behaviours you don’t like & more importantly how you can make it up to anyone you hurt - especially if that person is yourself. easier said than done, especially for the obsessive types, but again i find that redirecting thoughts makes this easier than blaming yourself for fixating on your guilt. it can be an endless cycle really. how do you apologise to others + how do you apologise to yourself? if you don’t do either of those much, start working from there

get feedback from others where appropriate but take the feedback with a grain of salt until you have multiple perspectives

watch self regulation skills vids or read about it or... cant believe i’m saying this.. listen to a p*dcast. whatever helps you absorb information the fastest. ideally you would learn about this through written/ spoken word of both your own and others, through audio, visually, artistically etc to master self-regulation but that’s obviously not realistic or convenient for everyone so start small with what seems most realistic to you!!! I know especially Pisces mars can get quickly lose interest or motivation when it comes to things involving thorough detail lol. the next point expands on this but what works for me is pretending I’m my own parent. in a way we all are our own parents, but emotionally investing myself in that fantasy helped me apply my energy to things I’d rather not do (like doing assignments is still very hard for me, and to avoid discouraging myself from doing them, i kind of have a conversation with myself about it and kind of take on the role of child + parent. this is just an example - sometimes it just helps to use your traits to your own advantage, like Pisces mars being more interested in fantasies/emotionally engaging things than boring menial tasks; i used an emotionally engaging fantasy to motivate myself to do work, be creative <3). avoid relying on others for regulation & discipline. this can be very difficult for some of us + i understand and empathize with this. the point here is to be as independent as you can be.  also something going wrong does not necessarily mean it’s a sign from the universe to stop trying i promise

on the note of independence, take steps to becoming your own cheerleader. motivate & encourage yourself through positive self talk. in times where you feel demotivated, helpless or worthless, and say encouraging things to yourself. be aware that this will often seem silly and a waste of energy and u know how much Pisces mars like to save their energy at all costs lmao so this is definitely a common, normal reaction but every time this discourages you, remind yourself that IT IS worth trying and YOU are worth trying for yourself. sometimes I literally have to say cheesy shit like “you can do this” out loud repeatedly until I convince myself. it’s tiring & maybe embarrassing but recovering from chronic self-pity is even more tiring and embarrassing. avoid relying on others to uplift you & make you feel better. not to say that people shouldn’t help people, but just so you’re able to have your own back as much as possible

be more intellectually present oh my god 🤡 I beg of you. this can be very difficult especially for people who deal with adhd/mental illness(es)/trauma/learning disorders/developmental disorders etc. I don’t have all the answers for that but one thing most of us can do is engage in activities that nurture our intellectual health more frequently ; whether that’s reading (nonfiction preferrably), doing newspaper puzzles, crosswords/sudoku apps, problem-solving activities that don’t involve emotional appeal, etc just do it often. we all know how emotionally attentive Pisces mars can be but engage your intellectual side gamers (i.e. don’t game). I say this as a Pisces mars myself lolz please this is literally self-care

ik this is a snooze point but physical stimulation especially exercise can be really good for emotional wellbeing/ release. otherwise find literally any form of release - healthy forms I cannot stress this enough

wrt anger, bitterness, feelings of defeat: Pisces placements often have an external locus of control and thrive when they consider/have faith in something bigger than them. could be astrology, spirituality, religion, art, community, culture, all of the above, whatever makes u feel connected.

question your own intentions (but don’t overdo this); why am i acting this way or feeling this way? am I fishing for attention? if so, is there anything I can do to give myself the same warm feeling attention/validation from others would give me? am I acting like this because I feel hurt or taken advantage of? if so, is it possible for me to have a safe, healthy conversation about this with the source of the problem? WHAT is the source of the problem? what can i do about it? write this down if you can somewhere private and read it back to yourself later, notice any cognitive distortions in your thinking and make adjustments. this will help you practice using your intellectual side in distressing moments but there’s less point in using your thinking if it’s warped if you feel that’s the case for you. so google cognitive distortions & how to deal with them to get examples! try to make the adjustments next time you feel overwhelmed or have heightened emotions/senses

be firmer with your boundaries. with others AND yourself. the less you resist against boundaries the more your life will know peace because you are more careful with the people and/or behaviours you allow into YOUR life. do *not* ease up on your boundaries for the sake of other people. betraying yourself for others or immediate gratification is rarely a good idea in the long run. I’ve done the mistake of betraying my values for others many times and it’s caused unnecessary conflict which we are notorious for avoiding. that is until the evil puppeteer living in our brains snaps their fingers and commands us to go ham

[woozi]

the thirst tweets yza 😭😭😭 i cannot. as much as fun this was, we were so close to getting jaebs with cats <//3

headlocking sk 😭😭 DJJDSKSK i would stand there like wonu clapping in the soop, for you <3. it's hindi ( actually it's my 2nd language but i speak in it the most w ppl outside of family djdjdjk ) my mother tongue is almost dwording djdjdkdk </3 i think im last gen who still speaks it, kids these days only know hindi or english.

ALSO!!! the footwork in senses choreo???? i liked it sm <3 yugyeom makes it look so easy to move like that?!?

same jdjdkddk godddd sometimes it takes a month to complete a drama which i like and started on my own will and sometimes it only takes 3 days. it doesn't matter how much i love something if i won't watch it, then I won't watch or consume it at all 💀.

ohhh, i've known jamie as an after school club mc first and singer second. like there was this time i was suddenly obsessed w eric nam's before we begin album i think around that time i first listened to one or two songs of jamie ( it was all spotify's doing jddjks) but then i forgot abt both and went back to listening to my regular ones. honestly i feel like i've gotten to know and appreciate jype artists ( those i know ) more, only after they've changed agencies it could just be me or my timing tho djdjdjh. have you listened to hanbin's solo album? honestly it's been no.1 album from 1st half of 2021 for me. i was not even looking forward to it or even knew djdjsk but i'm so glad i did i really like the songs & lyrics.

almost whatever jackson has released after mirrors has been to my taste leaving few bsides here and there. i love lmly <3 idk why for some reason i tend to mix pretty please and lmly up a lot djdjsk maybe it's bc of white tee and jeans. both mvs concept and songs are fantastic but if i have to pick one w/ mv & only considering the song, i do love lmly a little bit more then pretty please. wbu? <3

mark kept saying ' when we go back ' during the live so i got more confused each time, went on twt and got to know djdjdk. twt list of both svt & got7 of update accounts is like my newspaper, in free time i open it to see what is going on, sometimes jdjddk.

and of course i know abt woozi's cover <3 i've listened to it a lot jdjdksk he's so <//3

i could listen to his voice all day.

there is one cover of 10 cm hoshi dropped last year i like it sm <3 it made me so happy!!, around that i was obsessed with some of 10 cm's songs. help is one of my most favorite.

i really really wish for dokyeom to cover more day6 songs or just any songs </3 would really appreciate one from mr. joshu_acoustic too 😿.

did you see the way dokyeom woke up with a smile on his face in 5th in the sopp ep <//3 he's so precious 😭 (i'll try to link next time idk links go through asks tho djjddj sometimes tumblr eats it up). i don't even know what a smile is for first 2 hours after i've woken up. also i think i like this (sk coming and karaoke one - 5th) ep a lil more bc of that half minute of singer cheol it served us. i need him to sing more omg <//3

the soop song tho it's so sweet 😭💕. i love love how they brainstorm and make songs it's such an interesting process. i love what going seventeen is now but i miss watching the song making & recording process (even rho they do show it in inse after cb but jdjdks). the one where they made gose song, recorded it and made choreo/mv i love. it's still remains as one of my most favorite ep. they compose & write songs so smoothly & make it look so effortless <3

thank you for letting me ramble abt silly little things and responding to them, yza <3 love hanging out w/ you. i hope you're also having fun djjddj (i'll try to keep these short fr 😭 djdkdk i feel a bit bad for making you read so much nonsense :3)

take care of yourself, yza <3 sending good week wishes. - 🪂🪂🪂

I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT TO SEE JAEBEOM READ THIRST TWEETS BEFORE MY VERY EYES WHICH ALTERNATE AU IS THIS 😭

also mood tbh we could've gotten something like jacks' puppy vid </3

LIKE WONU CLAPPING FJKDJKFDJFD in true infj fashion <3 wait naurr that's so sad </3 do they not teach it in schools?

ALSO YES OH MY GODDDDDDDDD house king show us ur fancy moves <3 as a fellow dancer i am throwing him my shoe rn <3 also i literally have never seen smth like this in kpop how did people fucking sleep on this icb it..

I FULLY RELATE HELLO????????????????? what dramas have u been watching? and which genres are u into? <3 i also just finished vincenzo today it was so good 😭 took me like.. a week, i think (?), though bc svt has SO MUCH content and i dont like being behind on svt shit esp bc i also run an update blog lmaooo 😭

WAIT I FORGOT SHE ALSO DID EMCEEING 😭 she's such a fun person </3 AND ERIC NAM FDKJDFJK i have one-sided beef w him lmao when he was still new to the scene he would reply to everyone's @s but he never replied to me so i felt v .. </3 (also this is what.. 13 year old me speaking so this def does not reflect how i feel abt him now JKJKFJKDFF) i also get that </3 i feel like jype doesn't manage them well (i dont know shit behind the scenes and shit abt the industry in-depth but u know... it Kind Of Shows esp w how the artists themselves speak abt the agency lol). and i have not!! i am truly a svtpoppie 😭 i will though bc u recommended it to me <3 i also have been seeing him frequently on tiktok lol, ALSO BC OF LEE HI!!

honestly i haven't been keeping up w his albums anymore just the title tracks so i cant say much 😭 i also def prefer lmly over pretty please i was actually obsessed w it for a while!! i love jackson's vision so much though, the cinematography is EVERYTHING

literally reading abt what our boys have been up to like reading the morning paper KJDSFKJDSJKSJKD

V GOOD FOR U TO HAVE COME ACROSS THE COVER... I JUST DISCOVERED IT BY ACCIDENT 😭 also i have to agree although i definitely do not want to admit that i am more than willing to listen to some man sing to me all day 😭😭😭😭😭 jihoon's voice is just... different to me for some reason. i have a hard time picking between him & seokmin tbh </3 hbu, who's ur fave svt vocalist?

ALSO YES THAT WAS SO CUTE OF HIM!! AND V ON BRAND TOO </3 the way u listen to 10cm..... im giving u an award rn <3 im guessing you listen to k-indie too?

DK THOUGH... I'M VERY MUCH WILLING TO ADMIT THAT I'D LISTEN TO HIM ALL DAY.... something about him... AND NOT THE JOSHU_ACOUSTIC FJDJFDJKFD 😭😭😭 i hate his username so much- why... WHY...

I DID!!!!!!!!! and i was so surprised too bc.. who wakes up smiling?????? what'd he dream of???????????? he's such a happy person i cant imagine what thats like 😭 the first thing i do when i wake up is make the >:| face JFJKFDKJFD also oh my god i just read that you're experiencing the same thing 😭😭 bestie trait!! KJJKFDKJFD ALSO YOU COULDN'T BE MORE RIGHT?????????? im always campaigning for vocalist coups im SOOO glad u feel the same way <3 his voice is just so comforting to me </3 idk i just really like his timbre

and v true omg i'm always fascinated to see how they actually work all this out!! the bts recording/choreo making vids are also my favorite gfkjdfkjdfj HOW ARE WE SO SIMILAR WE MIGHT AS WELL BE THE SAME PERSON 😭also jihoon in that gose behind vid........... in universe factory............... i still think about that Look from time to time... 😭this is also why i respect the boys sm tbh. everyone in the industry undeniably works so hard but to actually get this much creative freedom and to basically lead the group and their direction music and performance-wise is so insane to me... no wonder jihoon's always in his studio. i couldnt be happier that they get to live off of doing what they like im also so so proud of them they must work so hard <3 esp w all the content they're giving us.. icb it's always like this in caratland im so used to being an ahgase that gets like.... 1 cb a year😭

AND NOOO OMG DON'T BE SORRY I REALLY LOOOVE GETTING UR MESSAGES </3 and i love how lengthy they are makes me feel like ur just not making small talk (i hate small talk sm 😭) and that you're actually interested <3 i genuinely love bonding w u through these little asks i can never thank u enough for sending them <3 i hope ur having a lovely week as well!! u can always talk to me even if it's not kpop related and u just want to talk abt life or when u need some cheering up <3

[folkelorde]

* / GUIDE: CHARACTERS AT A NEWSPAPER.

hi, hello ! here’s just a guide for creating a character who works in a newsroom/for a newspaper. most of this is drawn from personal experience (+ my parents’ experiences) but i did some googling on your behalf as well. this guide isn’t just because i wanna see more accuracy, but also because there’s a lot of things about this environment that would be fun to write that i don’t really see being taken advantage of. so, check out under the cut for all my tips.

note: if you have any questions about your journalist or journalist-adjacent muse, i’m happy to try and help answer ! let me know if you have more questions this guide doesn’t cover, i just went to the points that might be most helpful for your muse plot-wise.

1. WHERE IS THE NEWSPAPER LOCATED/WHAT KIND IS IT? this makes a huge difference. 

the environment in a small town paper is going to be a lot more lowkey and casual than a larger city paper. 

most large papers are now all owned by big companies so really unless they’re the nytimes, they’re suffering because of constant budget cuts, layoffs, etc, that affect their ability to report the stories that the people in their area care about. they’re generally just pulling from AP articles. small town papers these days are mainly weekly or biweekly. 

another thing that has become really popular (at least in the US) are altweeklies. there’s probably one of these in your state, and they generally have a huge focus on narrative journalism, come out weekly, and almost have a magazine-like feel? most probably started out as arts publications but now do a lot of news coverage to make up for the lack of coverage in their area. these are generally independently owned. if you’re curious, there’s a whole list of them here. 

essentially, if you’ve got a larger, conventional paper, it’s probably consolidating and the workers are suffering. if you’re in a tiny small town paper, it’s probably chill and if there’s ever any kind of real news, it’s the story of the fucking year. and if you’re at an altweekly, you’re kind of in the middle and maybe new to reporting news, since you have to make up for what your big city paper isn’t doing.

2. WHAT DOES YOUR CHARACTER DO? there are more people at a newspaper than writers and photographers! in fact, a lot of newspapers don’t really have staff photographers any more, just an army of freelance ones that they call on. here are some ideas for positions that your character can have:

intern: if your character is a writer under 25, they’re probably an intern. internships sometimes blossom into full-time gigs, if the paper is doing well enough to hire someone new on. 

staff writer: if your character is under 30, they’re probably one of the youngest people, if not the youngest, especially if they work in news (arts sections might have a few more younger people, but i’ve never really met a reputable news writer that wasn’t 30+). writers DO NOT spend much time in the office at all and are often on the go, running around, working from home, whatever, and popping into the office for meetings and such. seriously, they’re never there. 

freelance writer: maybe your character writes niche things on the side for a publication, like movie reviews, a political column, book reviews, etc. i know a woman that’s really into opera and she wrote into our paper asking if she could write about that so whenever there’s an opera she writes about it and that’s it. generally the people who have a column (doing reviews of some kind especially) are freelance and don’t work for the paper full time. so if your character is like a “book reviewer,” maybe consider having them do something else too. tbh, they’re probably an author. 

editor: this depends SO MUCH on the size of the paper. at the paper where i work, there’s a news editor and an arts editor. however, a tiny paper probably just has one editor for everything, and a larger paper probably has an editor for each and every section. so consider the size when you consider your character’s role, and seriously, if your character is younger, they will NOT be in this position. managing editors don’t rly exist any more unless you’re like the nytimes or something. even then. 

data journalists/data editor: again depending on the size of your paper, there’s probably one or no people that do this. however, this is becoming a crucial part of most newsrooms – people that do data analytics, build charts, work with lots of spreadsheets. these people do a lot of great shit and have been the frontrunners on a lot of big stories as of late. also, whenever you’re reading something and it’s got charts and graphs, it’s probably a data person behind that. this is really crucial with politics and elections, but also with all of the incoming data about climate change. 

web people: even the smallest fucking newsroom probably has one person who’s doing all the website stuff. web is just as important as print these days, as you probably know, and the only people surviving without good websites are the tiny small town papers because that’s a really niche market. but even they have websites, even if they’re not too snazzy! 

designers: so important!! these are the people that are at the office ALL THE FUCKING TIME, mainly because they can’t really do their work from home and they’re working on deadline, not only with the writers/editors but with the sales department too. where i work, the designers are loud and crass and fun and they’re all super close friends because like i said, they’re there all the time and a lot of late nights working on the paper and on ads and stuff.  

photographers: like i said, they’re mostly freelance and they want to be. but maybe if they have a really good relationship with the paper and have been there a while, they might have a full-time gig. jonathan byers would not have a full time job in 2019. 

sales team: even at the smallest of papers, there’s a good chance the sales team is the biggest team on staff. this is how newspapers rake in money, unless they’re on a nonprofit model, and in that case they probably don’t really have a sales team because they’re entirely funded by the readers (it works like NPR). sales team is probably in and out of the office a lot because they’re making sales calls and full of some interesting characters, you know, like on the office lmao. because of their relationships with businesses, it’s not uncommon for them to be the first ones to hear about a story OR to be the ones bitched at when a story portrays someone unfavorably, especially if its someone who advertises w the paper. 

marketing/social media: nonexistent in a small town paper, but otherwise, this is becoming a more crucial part of newspapers. a lot of newspapers also put on community events, so there’s a lot of event planning and promotion involved here too. 

secretary: a good job for a younger muse, probably answering phones and the door and organizing the calendar and helping with the classifieds and all of that bullshit. this person has to be a real people person. they’re also probably at the office all the time. 

publisher: head honcho! they generally own the damn place and make the calls on all the big picture decisions. if they’re not the owner, they’re still CEO-adjacent, yk?

3. YOUR MUSE PROBABLY WORKS WEIRD HOURS. like almost definitely. the news cycle is 24 hours and even if your character isn’t reporting on breaking news, they’re operating around other people’s schedules to get the story or put it in place, AND, yes, they’re probably working around breaking news or dealing with a crisis. or, unexpectedly, a story can go viral and that affects everyone in the office too. so, sometimes your muse might go into work at 11am and stay until 8pm or they’ll get called in at random times or have to go. this can lead to conflicts with other muses who don’t quite understand, or affect relationships when there’s an important moment and your muse has to jet off for work. it’s nice to keep in mind that your muse probably doesn’t just work 9-5. your muse also likely works holidays and such too, and if they’re not working, they’ve got their phone on them. always gotta be plugged in. more conflict! 

4. LAYOFFS. it’s impossible to talk about the industry without it. here’s a story my coworker told me the other day: “i just started my job at [redacted large paper] and the company was going through layoffs. since i was the new guy right out of college, i thought i’d be the first to go. but i wasn’t. they kept me and started laying off all the old-timers, people who had been with the paper forever.”  – THIS IS A HUGE STRAT FOR THESE CORPORATE PAPERS. it’s actually cheaper for them to keep the newer workers and lay off the people who have accrued a lot of benefits and pto and are close to retirement and such. this could be an interesting angle for a younger muse who’s pushed into a position of a lot of responsibility that they weren’t prepared for, or a muse who was at a paper and is layed off and now works for a smalltown type of paper – could be a fun sort of muse to play in your typical “small town” rps – some bigwig talent that’s now struggling after being laid off. the big name to know is gannett, who owns a huge majority of papers in places big and small, but they’re now merging with gatehouse...which is leading to even more consolidation right now.

p.s. if you’re curious, my coworker was eventually laid off from said [redacted large paper] later on

5. THE BIG SCOOP. your muse probably isn’t constantly on the scoop of the century, even at a big paper. especially if your muse is younger, they’re probably not being given that responsibility. so, if part of your plot is that your muse is breaking a big story, they probably don’t do that sort of thing all the time and it’s a big deal to them! it’s also not unusual for a writer to be working on a story over a long, long period of time, especially if it’s a very big story, or for them to be covering it in bites (like a murder trial). 

6. JACK OF ALL TRADES? writers especially are sort of expected to have a lot more proficiencies than just writing. you gotta be able to shoot your own videos and pictures too, add your posts to the web, so on. there’s more to it than just ‘writing,’ as you probably know. keep that in mind, although your muse might not LIKE that they need to do all of these things. 

7. FOLLOWING THE LAW! you’ve got to let people know that you’re interrogating them for the news, that they’re on the record, all of that shit. it’s hugely unethical if you don’t, and you can’t just be publishing people’s photos without their permission. you see a lot of movies where journalists go undercover and don’t tell people that they’re interrogating them for the paper and that probably wouldn’t happen (gale weathers from the scream movies would’ve been sued so fast for all of her defamation). also, newspapers spend a LOT of time dealing with government bureaucracy. like you expect a records request to get answered within the legal time frame, but it never fucking does, and often times you’re waiting on the state or even suing them for not sending you the records but they don’t give a fuck, they’re the state. it can be a lot of jumping over hurdles and through hoops to get any kind of info from the government...especially from the police. so even if information is supposed to be public, sometimes it can be a challenge to get, and maybe something your muse can struggle with. if your muse is in a roleplay where government workers are also present, this could be a fun plot/conflict to play out.