#it’s like jd doesn’t want people to keep playing on plus

[feralportalmaster]

So no more seasons?

[ncisfranchise-source]

NCIS: Sydney offers a little insight into team leader Mackey (Olivia Swann) in the latest episode, with the investigation forcing her to open up about her past.

While the team has someone in custody claiming he killed the victim, and Mackey is willing to believe it at first — she is very much against deserters, as Frank (Linal Haft) was after serving and receiving the Navy Cross — it soon becomes clear there’s more than it seems to the case. He couldn’t have killed the victim for the reason he claimed (blackmail) since the other man was repatriating the medals he’d found.

And so, in an attempt to get Frank to talk, Mackey reveals that while she was stationed in Afghanistan, three guys wandered off base and wound up in a village on the wrong side of the border. She disobeyed a direct order and with two others, went to rescue them. The three guys made it home to face the music, but the two with Mackey did not.

Below, Swann talks about Mackey opening up, filming that scene, a possible connection to NCIS‘ Gibbs (Mark Harmon), and more.

I like Mackey!

Olivia Swann: I feel like she comes in so hot that I think it could be 50-50 whether people are going to like that or be a bit taken aback by it, but I’m thrilled that you like her. I love her.

We finally see her opening up, but she does it reluctantly and only for the sake of the case, and she turns off the microphone so JD (Todd Lasance) can’t hear her. So how much did that take out of her, not just because of what happened, but also because it’s something she doesn’t talk about?

Yeah, I think it’s such a pivotal moment for Mackey, and it really does kind of add this different layer to her. She’s always someone who will put herself, her job, and her body on the line for a case, and this is no different, even though I think it affects her way, way more. And I also love that choice to switch off the microphone because it still shows that no matter how she’s clicked with JD, there’s still this element of, she’s not okay being vulnerable in front of him just yet. And I love that. It still creates space for them to do more connections and more delving into each other, and figuring each other out. But I think it’s a big moment for her. It really is. And like you said, she’s doing it for the case, but it’s a moment for her that, I think, takes a lot to go there.

How was it filming for you? Because it’s the most vulnerable that we’ve seen Mackey thus far.

It was a very interesting day on set. Usually days on set in this season were full of laughter, just nonstop laughter and messing around and hanging with everyone. But it was just myself and Linal Haft, who plays Frank so incredibly, and I knew that I had to get into a zone and into a space that reflects where she’s at in that scene. From even just going into the makeup trailer in the morning, I had music, and I was trying to stay as much as I could in that emotional state, which was tough because I love going into work, and it’s always such a wonderful vibe, but I had to make sure that I was honoring where she was and the emotions and the feelings she was having. So it was quite a somber, intense day, but it was necessary for that scene, and I’m glad that I was able to get to a space where I could do justice to that emotion and also the beautiful writing that Tamara Asmar, who is the writer on this episode, had done. I just wanted to honor it.

What is it going to take for her to open up to someone else from the team, other than DeShawn (Sean Sagar), who knows about her past, to tell JD about this?

I know I’m intrigued, too. I have no idea what it’s going to take, but she’s the kind of woman who will probably keep her cards as close to her chest for as long as possible as opposed to facing being that vulnerable in front of people that she’s growing to care for. I think also part of her is used to being stoic and strong and the leader. She’s used to not showing any cracks or vulnerability. I’m not quite sure what it will take for her to willingly give up that information, so we’ll see.

Mackey and JD reluctantly started working together. How is their dynamic going to continue to evolve for the rest of the season?

I think we definitely just see them falling more into this seamless teamwork that was very clear from the beginning, but like you said, they were both very reluctant to maybe allow it to become a thing or allow it to exist. But I think we started to see Mackey actually genuinely enjoying JD’s company and seeing how he operates and kind of respecting that. I think the wonderful thing about the two of them is that no matter how much they respect each other and grow to respect each other and like each other, they will always hold each other accountable for their actions, and they’re not afraid to disagree with one another. And I think that’s where the respect comes in. They get each other, but also they’re trying to run their own show. It forms a really, really cool dynamic.

I have to say I really like the dynamic between Mackey and Blue (Mavournee Hazel), and I felt so bad for her with that bird.

I know! Oh my God, I adored filming those scenes because I love Mav so much. But also, I hated them because I had to be so kind of blunt, and I don’t know, whatever the word is, standoffish, and all those things direct to her, but I also love that dynamic. I think it’s just so fun, and it reads so well onscreen.

In the premiere, Mackey says it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission, Gibbs’ rule 18. When I asked Morgan O’Neill if that means she knows Gibbs, he said, “there was a certain former NCIS agent who reached out to her at her lowest moment and dragged her back into the organization. And that agent may or may not be Jethro Gibbs.” So, what can you say about the possibility of that agent being Gibbs?

I think Morgan summed that up perfectly. I don’t have to say anything different. Can I copy his answer? Because that’s exactly what I would’ve said, too.

And what can you say about whoever that was, what does that person mean to Mackey, and what happened there that shaped who she is now?

I think, in that moment, that person gave her a lifeline, and she’s extremely grateful for that. What we see of her now is that lifeline that she has been given, and she kind of leads with it with such pride and such honor, which is why I think she takes her job so seriously because it was given to her in a really dark time and a time that she really needed it.

[takethistoyourstardust]

Mage Ranks the JD2023E Map... CAN’T STOP THE FEELING!

With a lull in the Lover Coaster, we’re finally starting on the Enter the danceverses story mode/playlist!

MAP: CAN’T STOP THE FEELING! - Justin Timerlake DIFFICULTY: Easy EFFORT: Moderate JD+ NEEDED?: No SEASON: Base game/Enter the danceverses playlist

Get that sunshine from your pocket as I talk about the introductory map to this story mode!

--

Am I the only one who doesn’t feel strongly about this song? Like, I’m leaning towards positive with this song, but as someone who was way too old for the Trolls movie (which this song was first made for) when it came out, I just think of it as just another pop song. Nothing terrible, just doesn’t stand out.

The dance for this map is... fine! I don’t mean that in a derogatory way, it’s genuinely fine. It’s supposed to be the very first map in the story mode, and might even be the first map that someone plays after they boot up the game, so it’s going to be a bit simple and repetitive in it’s dance moves, especially if you know the dance moves the guest coaches are having Sarah and Wanderlust copy. But the dancing is fun and energetic (matching with the Moderate effort tag), and seeing the interactions between Sarah and Wanderlust is very cute.

Speaking of... Sarah and Wanderlust!

Starting with Sarah first, she’s SO adorable. I’m not sure why a girl who was uncomfortable dancing in front of her friends was suddenly comfortable dancing with Wanderlust, a complete stranger, but she gains the cutest outfit in the world so i don’t mind nor care. The space buns, the yellow fluffy jacket, the shiny neon green pleated skirts, the splashes of bright fucking pink... Literally an icon of our time. HER SHOES ARE CHUNKY TOO that’s a very important thing. The way she dances is cute, it’s like she’s dancing for the first time.

Wanderlust is cool as hell. First off I’ve always loved the word “wanderlust”, and I think it fits great with a guy who’s able to open portals to any danceverse he wants, and is the son of an alien goddess and Copyright Friendly Doctor Strange. His outfit is a bit confusing to me but it’s alright because he’s my friend. I abhor the crown though, and it’s the one thing he can’t remove according to the Just Dance twitter. But other than that, he’s just a super friendly coach who wants to help Sarah out of her shell, and show her the wonders of dancing. He’s a friendly guy! And no one can hate on that! And if you do hate on him for it I’m gonna fucking kill you!

Also fun fact, his actor, Jerky Jessy, is the one who choreographed both this version and the alt map version, so good for him.

Watching the routine, I feel like there’s a lot of moments where people who like Sarah/Wanderlust can point and be like “look at that, they’re being so cute”, and I support you guys. However, I do just genuinely see it as “Wanderlust shows his new friend around the danceverses”.

Four other coaches make cameos; TGIF’s coach, I Like It’s coach, Temperature’s coach, and Sweet Sensation’s coach. They don’t do much but have Sarah and Wanderlust copy their moves, which is fair and cute, especially if you’ve been keeping up with the series. Plus, two of these coaches (I Like It and Temperature) are from maps Jerky Jessy also choreographed.

Of course, a fifth coach shows up at the very end to kidnap the four guest coaches, causing Sarah and Wanderlust to fucking book it, but we’ll get to her map tomorrow...

As simple as the routine is in this map, what truly sells it is the spectacle of it all. Moving from place to place, constantly shifting camera angles, and just an overall sense of how HUGE this place is. This is the childlike sense of whimsy and wonder I’ve been missing for a while. To be completely transparent, I haven’t played a Just Dance game since... 2014, if memory serves. So a lot of these references are lost on me. But I can see how big the world of Just Dance has become since it landed in my peripheral vision, and it’s truly both fascinating and a bit fucking mind boggling. I remember when one of the biggest criticism lobbied at the game series was “where the hell is Lady Gaga’s song Just Dance”. I remember playing the first one in 2010. Fuck, I remember playing Rayman Raving Rabbids TV Party back on the Wii, the minigame collection with the dancing minigame that inspired the creation of the Just Dance series in the first place. It’s so fucking wild that I’m still talking about a series I remember playing with my older sister when I was in middle school, a series that simply started off with Ubisoft going “hey the casual market liked the dancing minigame, let’s make that a full game with real dancers”.

Fuck, man. The more things change, I guess.

--

GENERAL RATING: THUMBS UP!

SPECIFIC RATING: 9/10

Man, this map is just fun. It’s a wonderful introduction to both the Enter the danceverses story line, and honestly to the game in general. It truly celebrates the game in a way that doesn’t feel too overly cheesy (unless you’re me who’s suddenly remembering how old you are lol), and the hook at the end where Night Swan appears and kidnaps the guest coaches is genuinely intimidating, and a great way to get players to look into the next map in the playlist. The only thing keeping it from being a perfect map is that I don’t care much about the song, the routine can be a little too easy for experienced players, and the almost ONE MINUTE LONG OPENING SCENE WHAT THE HELL. I get we needed to build a little character for Sarah and show how she got literally into the game, but could we not have done it in a slightly more truncated way? At least five seconds could’ve been cut off. But, overall, fun map, fun coaches, fun way to start the story mode! You can’t ask for much more than that!

--

Thank you for reading! These story mode posts are gonna be slightly longer than normal, if only because I have to discuss characters and cutscenes. Not asking for a follow, just reminding you I’m ranking every map for this game, and if you’re a villain liker, you might wanna stick around for tomorrow’s ranking ;). And I’d love to know your thoughts on the map! Was it really the first one you played? Let me know, and I’ll see you tomorrow!

~ Mage <3

[darlington-v]

I know different interpretations of a work are generally enriching and cool... but c!dream villan interpretations is like how to tell me you only watch Tommy without saying you only watch tommy.... which would be fine but its not a great place to be making statements about the whole nature of the dsmp lol

Wild speculation, but sometimes I wonder if like, because the dsmp didn't really start as a narrative, and a lot of fans don't nessecarily enter it expecting a narrative, but then there is one and the fandom is really discourse heavy and everyone is sort of excpeted to have an opinion while maybe not expecting to form one from the begining or not having a ton of experience with narrative in a way that would "expect" them to have an opinion or not take things at face value??, I don't know if I explained that well at all... and I don't really even think thats right nessecarily... but like wow sometimes some of the takes about power and government and villany...

Honestly, it makes sense!!!

I think something interesting is like.... looking at how animatics have shaped the like tone and culture of the fandom essentially. Like, an interesting fact that I didn't really fully grasp until SUPER recently is like...

c!Wilbur out the gate admits he is manipulating c!Tommy. Like his first youtube video on the Dream SMP he admits his goal is to manipulate c!Tommy and people like c!Tommy into helping him achieve a potion ("drug") empire to monopolize on potions because there were a lot of people on the server who like to min-max, which is to put all of your effort into this one specific skill essentially. so like... i know minecraft doesnt have a skill tree but if it did, it would be putting all your points into that one specific branch of a skill tree. So he wanted to exploit the labor of all the TommyInnits to.... maintain a Potion Empire.

THIS IS A LONG POST BC I GOT CARRIED AWAY SO BUCKLE UP

And I don't think a lot of the fandom who joined later on knows this. I certainly didn't until like a week or so ago? Like... I knew c!Wilbur had been manipulative from the start because I'm a mod of (shameless self promo incoming) @dsmpanalysis and we have a lot of different POVs in that mod team and discord and we talk about it really frequently. I joined the fandom as someone who was really big on L'manburg ESPECIALLY crimeboys, and have turned into.... *gestures vaguely to my blog*

And ngl I owe a lot of it to @1-michibiki-1 in terms of c!Dream "Apologism" but all of the mods there have expanded my thoughts and views on the storylines of this narrative.

My application consisted of like largely essays about like... how I think Dream was the villain but he was meant to be the villain because you don't get any insight into his character WHICH.... IS A FAIR ASSUMPTION AT FIRST GLANCE. People are easily villainized when you cannot get a glimpse into their thought process. It's easy to dwindle someone down into this flat character and starting out I knew Dream didn't stream the SMP on purpose.

And I personally came to the conclusion of "Oh! So Dream is supposed to be the villain." However as the story continued and I learned more about what Dream went through I began to realize that... it's more than likely a form of a red herring. My opinions on this were immediately solidified when I watched Ranboo's 2 MIL stream because both Ranboo AND Dream agree on enjoying red herrings.

There have been MANY times were Dream has said that c!Dream is a complex character and he's not a wholly evil guy and there have been times where the narrative has honestly just proved that.

Anyways, what's important though was that... I learned most of this from other people who were more focused on c!Dream rather than myself. Eventually I shifted from c!Tommy to c!Ranboo and c!Techno after c!Tommy betrayed c!Techno and I began to realize.... everything I learned before hopping in wasn't exactly what it seemed.

Part of this is because I'm older, I heavily identify with c!Techno's sense of loyalty and philosophies on government, but I especially identify with the anguish c!Techno voiced in... a lot of lore but especially the lore around Doomsday.

I'm not 16 anymore. I don't always feel wronged by adults, or older people in my case, whenever they absolutely have done something wrong by me, but I do feel wronged by my close friends. I also felt like c!Tommy's sense of loyalty didn't line up with mine after what felt like him constantly flip-flopping and refusing to understand c!Techno's morals on government didn't line up with his.

In short, it was easier to identify with Tommy in these animatics versus in the actual stream content because c!Tommy is played by a 16 year old. I'm not a teenager and my line of thinking doesn't entirely line up with people that age anymore. It's harder to place myself in the same shoes of someone's OC who is played closer to their actual age, because I'm not that age.

Regardless, I was still on the c!Dream is a villain train. I wasn't ever like... c!Dream is repulsive I hate him, but I was like omg hot villain lad go brrr.

Even when the first like... mellohi, panic room, Ranboo lore stream popped up I thought "Oh! c!Ranboo corruption arc?"

And I was excited because I really wanted this shy, nervous character to turn into villain buddies with his good pal c!Dream. I'm a total sucker for villains and corruption arcs and all that good shit.

SO I STARTED GETTING REALLY INTERESTED IN ENDERSMILE. I'VE BEEN ON ENDERSMILE SQUAD OUT THE GATE. NOT THE SAME WAY I AM NOW, BUT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED THEM TO TEAM UP.

So... upon not really keeping up with c!Dream and being relatively??? indifferent? I don't think I started arguments on c!Dream back then, but I might have. But I remember like... starting to participate more whenever c!Dream came up and looking more into Dream's character BUT ESPECIALLY TALKING WITH OUR SERVER'S C!DREAM SPECIALIST MICHI ABOUT DREAM A LOT MORE.

And because Michi has been a watcher since day one and was a DTeam fan rather than a SBI fan, she was able to provide me with more information on how the server worked pre-Tommy but especially pre-Wilbur.

Now, you could definitely argue well Michi probably has clear bias but it made sense to me when I looked back on how the storyline had been constructed and was going along, and everyone in the server talks a lot about our own biases and how we want people to maybe not lean so hard on them. Michi would also provide like anecdotes on what had happened and I'm sure links were probably provided at one point but the point was I felt like Michi had no reason to lie or manipulate how the story was told and if she did, eventually someone would have pointed it out because... Group of like... right now it's around 20 or more analysts but I don't remember how many at the time there were. POINT BEING, WE'VE ALL GOT POINTS TO PROVE AND IN MY EXPERIENCE NOT MANY OF US HAVE BEEN SHY TO PROVE THEM.

So if anyone ever had any differing opinions they would be talked about and we literally had and still have discussions.

REGARDLESS.... I DIDN'T FACT CHECK IN DEPTH BECAUSE I THOUGHT PEER REVIEW WAS ENOUGH WHEN YOU HAVE LIKE HOURS UPON HOURS OF STREAMS TO WATCH.

Anyways. Eventually I started paying closer attention and looking more into c!Dream lore but only recently have I started to triple check before speaking about c!Wilbur lore because I know everyone has biases and while I did trust everyone's thoughts and analysis in the discord, whenever I make essays I typically like it to be largely air tight and if theres a mistake, I want it to be because I forgot not because I just trusted what was said. Plus, I wanted to get down to the specifics of how Wilbur had always started with manipulation on the mind.

SO I WATCHED HIS FIRST VIDEO ON THE DREAM SMP.

AND WHAT I WAS NOT BY ANY MEANS EXPECTING WAS WILBUR TO SAY WORD FOR WORD, VERBATIM,

"SO WHY DON'T I START AN INDUSTRY WHERE I USE THE TOMMYINNITS OF THE WORLD TO WORK FOR ME, TO CREATE THINGS THAT THE MIN-MAXERS OF THE WORLD WILL WANT."

Like... this is in no way an attempt to like hardcore villainize c!Wilbur like everyone does Dream, it's just more so to like REALLY outline how far off a lot of fandom interpretation of c!Wilbur is....

Because of SBI focused animatics.

Now, when I joined I watched A LOT of animatics that really highlighted like... Wilbur being this self-loathing JD-esque, "I destroyed it because I had to because the world was against me because no one loved us, Tommy" type of character. At least... that's what it came across as.

And it definitely highlighted the fact that Tommy was a victim, which he is. He is undoubtedly a victim and no not even any dream apologist can change my mind otherwise. Tommy, despite being an instigator sometimes, didn't deserve the abuse he received.

But these animatics never shown the fact that c!Wilbur started L'manburg as a shady ploy to exploit people like c!Tommy and vilify c!Dream so he could have power.

And that was easy because Dream and Tommy had wars before. They had spars and pranks and here's the plan to take back my disks and here's the plan to out smart the thieving little child etc etc.

And all of the animatics I watched never mentioned this. Neither did the recaps though. The recaps gave the events flat out, there didn't sound like there was bias, and honestly I don't really know if there was rather than like... a lack of nuance. And it's hard to provide a recap with that much nuance in a short period of time for a youtube video, to be perfectly fair.

However, this creates a perfect formula for entirely rewriting the history of a server. c!Wilbur quite literally fucking succeeded TO A META LEVEL. He slandered and ran smear campaigns against Dream and like he even does that with Sapnap in the beginning. But what's crazy is that it transferred over into the meta! Most of this fandom understands Wilbur as a victim of mental illness, and yeah maybe? He definitely wasn't mentally well by the end of pogtopia, but he never started out with honorable intentions. L'manburg was never a victim, only its citizens. The TommyInnits of the world.

I just think it's like... such an interesting case study. Because this is like... an opinion like shared by at least half of the fandom, but the vilifying of c!Dream is shared by MOST of the fandom I would argue. Which is like even more crazy for me because that was c!Wilbur's goal!!!

LIKE I GO INSANE WHEN I THINK OF THIS BECAUSE HIS REACH IS JUST TOO POWERFUL. HE'S NOT EVEN ENTIRELY REAL, JUST A MANIPULATIVE PERSONA OF SOME BRITISH GUY.

And I mean... maybe people who have watched Wilbur's video on the SMP still maintain this idea that Wilbur wasn't always the bad guy, but honestly... I wouldn't be surprised if their introduction was still an animatic. Like bias is hard to check and I'm not going to lie I could have sworn I watched both Wilbur's AND Tommy's video on the SMP in the beginning and yet I STILL was a ride or die for tragic yet on some level still honorable Wilbur and a resilient Tommy.

Like... upon watching Wilbur's first video... possibly again I was surprised because I thought I did watch it like right before I even started watching the streams and yet I was still so invested in c!Wilbur as this tortured anti-hero.

It took 6 months of... not being in an echo chamber, full of multiple different people of different ages, different stream POVS, and people who joined the fandom at different points in time.

IDK IF THIS WAS EVEN ENTIRELY RELEVANT IT JUST FELT TANGENTIALLY RELEVANT AND THIS WAS SOMETHING I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT FOR A HOT MINUTE AFTER LIKE WATCHING WILBUR'S FIRST VIDEO AGAIN.

TLDR;

SBI CENTRIC ANIMATICS HAD A LASTING AFFECT ON THIS FANDOM AS IT'S HARD TO GO BACK AND ACTUALLY CHECK THE NARRATIVE FOR SOLID FACTS FOR YOUR OWN INTERPRETATION BASED ON THE FACT THAT THIS NARRATIVE SPANS OVER HUNDREDS OF HOURS WORTH OF TWITCH STREAMS.

[mattpoitrass7thgoal]

Imagine thinking people hate JD because we wanted him benched, no we wanted him to wake up with the benching because he was not playing at the level we know he can play at. Yes he may have been on the wrong side but most games I couldn’t pick a single thing he done at all, he was underperforming. Plus did y’all not watch that one game where he left the puck in our own zone while multiple players from the other team were right there and skated to bench. I know you get upset cause his your uwu boy but sometimes he needs to experience stuff like Bjork, Kuraly and Heinen experienced when they weren’t playing to their potential or just ‘Bruce’s level’. And for some reason instead of taking him out of the lineup he just gets benched on the bench where he doesn’t play nearly full periods, it’s not the same. It wasn’t enough because it wasn’t showing him that someone else is hungry and willing to be in the lineup and fight for that spot. He NEEDED that benching and I’m glad he got that goal hopefully that gets him going and keeps his confidence up. Because we know he is capable of playing solid games and scoring consistently.

And before you say that Krejci only got his first goal and he should’ve been benched or something stupid like that. You gotta see that he has 12 assists so far compared to JD’s 4 assists. Krejci is one of the best playmakers I’ve ever seen so I would never suggest benching him cause even if he isn’t scoring he is setting up amazing plays.

[crash-cinematic-universe]

a sickly satisfaction (ch.1)

pairing: jason dean/reader

summary: high school sucks. jason dean makes it a little better.

warnings: uuhhhh murder, language, suicide discussion

notes: i have every chapter of this written out already, so every wednesday I’ll release a new one <3 in total the story is 7,800 words! but there are some parts that are kind of short, forgive me for those.

            Eyes down. Walk fast. Stay out of their way. Three simple steps to get through the day. They had an iron grip on the school, their perfectly manicured nails digging into the oily skin of the entire student body. High School was a bloody battlefield in the war that is life. However, the epitome of cruelty, the ultimate teenage angst inducing, self-esteem crushing, happiness shattering war machine came in the form of three girls and their weak-willed sidekick. That’s right; my biggest threat in high school is Heather Chandler, Heather McNamara, Heather Duke, and Veronica Sawyer. Veronica at least has some semblance of regret and empathy-- she’s just doing what she needs to survive. Unfortunately, that means the rest of us have to struggle to keep our heads above water. 

            Thankfully, I have a sanctuary. A refrigerator heaven filled with endless isles of roadtrip snacks and hangover remedies. Of course, this junk food Garden of Eden also happens to contain my best friend, Tommy Geller. Tommy is 18, emo, and gay, so naturally we got along pretty well. He sits behind the register and lets me hang around until closing. It’s actually pretty nice-- sometimes he lets me do busywork around the store. Sure, it’s sort of pathetic that Snappy Snack Shack is my main source of serotonin, but you know what? There are worse places to be. 

            “Pop open a bottle of champagne, Tommy, because today is a special day!” I cry, pushing open the small class doors. To my delight, the store is empty. There are no irritating customers there to make me keep my voice down.

            “Oh? And why is that?” Tommy inquires, his jet black hair falling in front of his eyes. He’s tired-- and bored-- and I’m the perfect remedy for that. 

            “Today marks exactly six months since I first stepped foot in this town,” I grin. Tommy’s eyebrows perk up.

            “Really? Congrats, kid,” He’s humoring me a bit, but there is a genuine reaction beneath his sarcastic remarks. 

            “Thanks, Tommy. Y’know, that’s twice as long as my time in New Jersey and three times as long as my run in Nebraska. I have a feeling dear old aunt Maria might actually stay here for good,” I hop over the counter before grabbing a can of Coke out of the fridge. I prop me feet up on the counter, but Tommy knocks them down.

            “You know the rules, kid, no stompy boots on the counter.” I roll my eyes. He wipes off the place where my shoes were before organizing the lotto tickets. “Anything interesting happen at school today?”

            “Eh, same old same old. The Heathers were bitches, Veronica was desperately trying to keep up, and I got tripped in the hallway,” Tommy frowns.

            “God, those girls really need to get humbled,” He spits. 

            “You don’t need to tell me. They constantly act so… self-superior, as if their power doesn’t depend solely on whether or not everyone else hates themselves to believe they’re inferior to three teenage girls who are the definition of ‘peaked in high school’,” I squeeze the soda can in my hand, the metal crunching under the pressure. “They need to be more than humbled. The Heathers deserve to be dealt as much pain as they served,”

            “Watch it, kid, you’re sounding a bit homicidal,” Tommy jokes. If only he knew. 

            “It wouldn’t matter anyway. I don’t think they can die-- they’re like a Hydra. If you kill one of the Heathers, three more will grow in her place,” I sigh. Tommy looks concerned.

            “Y/n, you don’t actually want to kill them, right?” I hesitate. The silence makes Tommy worry.

            “I wouldn’t exactly lose sleep if one of them did die,” I reply nonchalantly. “It would be like a public service. Similar to killing the black mold that grows in the girl’s showers,” Tommy looks at me for a second, his expression unreadable, before turning back to his counter. 

            “That’s morbid,” he says. “You know that? You sound like a killer in the making.”

            “Sometimes bad people deserve bad things.”

            “You’re absolutely not helping your case,” Tommy laughs. I can feel someone watching me. It’s an odd feeling, but I brush it off.

            “New topic?” I ask. Tommy nods.

            A mischievous grin grows on his face. “You got a boyfriend? Girlfriend? Partner? All of the above?” he asks hopefully.

            “No, Tommy, and don’t get your hopes up,” I chuckle, before standing up and admiring the neon sign outside.

            “Oh come on, there has to be someone. You can’t possibly go to that hellhole every day and not see at least one hot person!” Tommy groans.

            “Everyone at Westerburg is either evil or boring. No one interests me and I’m not interesting to anyone. Plus, my attention is mainly focused on getting through the day in one piece, not getting laid.” I neglect to mention the stranger I saw in the Cafe yesterday. He was pretty hot, and didn’t seem to be a douchebag-- in fact, he shot two of the douchiest douchebags with blank bullets. A real rarity at Westerburg.

            “God, you need to get out more. I see some pretty people pass through here occasionally, I’m going to start pawning you off,” he jokes.

            “Oh, god, no,” I joined in on his laughter.

            “Yup, I’m going to give every hot person your photo and your address until you finally score yourself some arm candy,” Tommy can barely form sentences through his laughter.

            “I’m gonna to get murdered if you do that, Tom,” I giggle. 

“             And that would be damn shame,” A voice calls from across the counter. I look up to see the most attractive man I’ve ever seen in my entire life. It’s the same guy from the Cafe-- although in the bright convenience store lighting he looks more like a ghost than a man. His jawline looked sharp enough to slice me in half, his cheekbones high and defined. His hair was gorgeous and his teeth were really, really nice. 

            “Uh, yeah, that would totally s-suck,” I choked. Tommy shot me the most horrified look I’ve ever seen. “I’ve, uh, seen you around. That stunt you pulled in the Cafe was wicked, man, seriously.”

            “Hey, it was a public service,” He smirked. Tommy gave me a ‘holy-shit-I’ll-leave-you-two-alone’ look before disappearing in the isles across the room. I could see him peeking through the cereal boxes. “I’m Jason Dean, but most people call me JD.” He offers his hand for me to shake.

             “Y/n, Y/n Ln,” I grip his hand firmly and try not to have a breakdown over the contact. “Y’know, there are much less extreme ways to get people to fuck off than, well, shooting them.”

              “The extreme always seems to make an impression, though, doesn’t it?” His voice was a little bit lower and he leaned in a little bit closer. Tommy was freaking out across the aisle, his eyes wide as his hand raked through his greasy hair. 

            “That it does,” I grin. “There are quite a few people in that school that deserve certain... extremities,” 

            “I think you’re right,” Jason smirked once again. I kept my composure as best I could. “Speaking of extremities, I saw you and Kurt in the hallway last week,” My face is lit ablaze as I recall the incident. Kurt had been continuously pestering me the entire day, and eventually I reached my limit.

            “I guess they aren’t joking when they say the chin is the knockout button,” Jason seems impressed, although I can’t really tell because looking him in the eyes seems like a death sentence. “Landed me three days detention, though. That sucked. Although I guess it can’t compare to whatever they’re dealing you,” At this point, one of the regulars began approaching the front doors. Tommy sprinted out before they got in, seemingly explaining that my entire love life depends on whether or not I can play it cool.

            “Eh, what can I say. I sort of dug myself a grave there,” I spoke without thinking.

            “The only graves that should’ve been dug are Kurt and Ram’s. My one critique? Use real bullets next time,” I froze. Why the fuck would I say that? I mean, I’m not wrong but I doubt JD would stick around after--

            “I like the way you think,” JD laughs, his ears tinted pink. Jason looks at me, and for a moment, I look right back. There’s something behind his eyes, something festering and enticing. I wonder if my eyes communicate anything. “I’ll see you around, Y/n L/n,” 

            “And I’ll see you, Jason Dean,” With that he winked at me, spun on his heel, and walked out the front door. Tommy practically sprinted across the room as I released every muscle I’d been tensing. I slowly melted onto the floor. Laying on the tile with my eyes trained on the bright lights overhead.

            “Oh my god,” Tommy breathed. “Oh my fucking god that was-- oh my god.”

            “I know,”

             “Did you see him? He’s like a greek god,”

            “I know,”

            “And he was totally into you, like, totally,”

            “I should’ve given him my address. I wouldn’t mind getting murdered by him.” I say breathlessly. Tommy sits on the counter and looks down at me.

            “I think I need to teach you how to talk to boys,” Tommy sighs, shock still lingering on his face.

            “Pssh, I can talk to boys just fine,” I retort.

            “You almost collapsed when you saw him,” he says flatly.

            “That was--”

            “I thought you were going to pass out when he told you his name,”

            “But I--”

            “I genuinely believed you were going to vomit when he shook your hand,”

            “Alright! I give! I can’t talk to boys! You caught me! Lock me up and never let me embarrass myself like that again!” I surrendered, throwing my arms in the air before letting them collapse over my face. “He probably thinks I’m a freak,”

            “Are you joking? He was more smitten than you were!” This caught my attention, and I tore my arms away from my eyes. 

            “Huh? Elaborate!” I snapped.

            “You seriously didn’t notice? He’d been staring at you since you stepped foot in here, didn’t you see him? At first I thought it was weird, but then I realized he was smoking hot so I decided I’d let it slide,” “Comforting,” Sarcasm drips from my words. “Y’know serial killers and stalkers can be hot, too.” I rolled my eyes.

“             I seem to recall you saying something along the lines of ‘I wouldn’t mind getting mur--’,”

            “Alright, Tommy, we get it.” I cut him off in embarrassment. “Please continue.”

            “He comes in here a lot, so I knew he was alright. He was beet red the entire time you were talking. Didn’t you see the way he was in a perpetual state of stupid smiling? Dude, he was definitely into you and really bad at hiding it,” Tommy concluded.

            I smiled a big, dumb smile. I didn’t notice the fact that he was nervous, so he probably didn’t notice that I was dying, right? 

            “Tommy, I think we might have a keeper.”

            “Thank god, I don’t think I could stand to see you go to Prom alone. That would be too depressing, even for me,” Tommy enthused. I propped my feet against the edge of the counter, staring at the tips of my boots. For the first time in a long time, Tommy is silent. I can’t get his eyes out of my head. Then again, I don’t know if I want to. 

_________

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Gift of Magi; Brian May x reader

*Author’s note*

Here is yet another little special Christmas fic I have for you all. If you loved my Joe Mazzello one then you guys are REALLY GONNA ROT YOUR TEETH WITH THIS SWEET FIC. As you can see by the title, this is inspired by the beloved Christmas tale of the same name, for a year now since getting into the Queen/BoRhap fandom I’ve wanted to do this fic with one of the members of Queen but I didn’t know which one to do it with. Finally after doing some thinking and planning and realizing I hadn’t really done  a solo Brian May fic in a long time, I decided our beloved space poodle DESERVED this story. Enjoy my lovelies :)

Warnings: TOOTH-ROTTING FLUFF, Brian’s sickness (takes place in 1974 so that’s when he had his hepatitis scare along with some other things I had read up that happened during that time), Roger’s chaotic behavior, Freddie being a loving fairy godmother (you’ll see soon enough), and fluff, fluff, and you guessed it EVEN MORE FLUFF!!

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things​

@waddles03​

@psychosupernatural​

@ixchel-9275​

@simonedk​

@queensdivas​

@queen-paladin​

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​

@queendeakyy​

@geek-and-proud​

@wormzteef​

_______________________________________________________________

There it was.  The perfect gift for Brian.  The Refractor telescope, 30 power.  Don’t ask me what I just said cause I wouldn’t be able to tell you what all it does.  All I can say is that Bri’s been eyeing this bad boy for years and with an empty tripod he’s had since graduating University, he needed something to look up at the stars with (one of his classes he had to rent out a telescope and then return it to the professor once the semester ended).  

Yeah dating an astrophysicist Rockstar is one thing, but shopping for said astrophysicist rockstar is another, especially around the holidays and birthdays.  Sure he says all he needs is my love but I want to prove myself to him.  Plus I want to give him something special after the major health scare he had when he and Queen were touring with Mott the Hoople at the beginning of the year.

It was horrifying but I was there to help Brian recover from his Hepatitis scare and assure him that the band wasn’t going to replace him (bless his little heart, he was so sure the band was gonna abandon him) but they didn’t and they were there whenever they could, also they would send in some demos for me to play for Brian so that he could still have a say in the songs for their Sheer Heart attack album.

Now that Queen was slowly now getting recognized for their talents after “Killer Queen” made the top 10 in the charts, scratch that the entire album was going up the charts I wanted Brian to have something special to go with his tripod.

I took out my wallet and counted up my tips that I had been saving all year to buy this telescope. I was still a few pounds short but after today I should finally have enough to buy the telescope for my guy.

“Don’t you worry Bri. You’ll see the stars once again.” I put the money back in the side pouch of my purse and looked down at my watch. “Shit I’m gonna be late for work!” I exclaimed and quickly raced down the block towards the tree shop.  I had taken a second job at the Christmas tree shop to help with getting better tips for Brian’s telescope.

When I finally arrived, I walked into the open tree lot and punched in my timecard before the loud exclamation of my boss’ voice cried out.

“YOU’RE LATE!!”

“I’m sorry sir, I was……”

“Doesn’t matter! Now get out there and get those papers organized we’ve got customers out there who need trees!” I nodded and quickly went over to my desk and took out some of the reserved papers that some people filled out to confirm their tree orders.

The day was long and cold but every little penny counted.  I filled out the paperwork, helped the customer’s find their tree and even bypassed the boys at the shop and helped put the trees on top of the customer’s cars.

“Welcome to Mad Pete’s Tree shop how may I help you?”

“Yeah see my mate here is looking for a pretty cute tree, around (y/h), (h/c) and has two of the star glistening eyes he’s ever seen.” I looked up and low and behold there stood Roger and Brian.

“Really Rog? Did you have to go and say all that?”

“Hey bout time you got a taste of your own medicine of what we’ve had to deal with everytime you miss (n/n)!” I shook my head softly chuckling.

“So you guys really here to shop for a tree or are you trying to get me into trouble with the boss again?”

“Hey Fred and I did not cause that fire!” Roger defended himself.

“You guys were the only ones smoking at the time, you’re lucky I didn’t get fired from that little stunt.” I sassed him.  Brian gave him a disapproving look while Roger tried to brush it off, but as soon as he saw my scowl, he submitted and put on that puppy dog face of his.

“Sorry lovie. Can you forgive me?” I went up to him and embraced him.

“Of course I do yah big puppy dog.” I ruffled his long golden locks which made him exclaim as he tried to fix his hair back to normal.

“Oi! Do you know how long it takes for me to get my hair like this? It’s called a miracle darling.”

“Now you didn’t answer my question, what are you guys really doing here?”

“We figured we’d go and get us a tree since we couldn’t get one last year. Since we got some money now instead of hardly anything.” Brian said.

“Ahh I see. Well let’s see what I can help you with. Follow me gentlemen.” I guided them towards the back and there were some of the smaller trees that hadn’t been reserved and that could be affordable for Bri and Rog.  “I know it’s not much but I know you guys can afford these trees. Pete’s been trying to skyrocket the prices, especially for his prized 10 footers.”

“It’s perfect love, thank you.” He kissed me softly on my lips.  I slowly wrapped my arms around him when I felt him take my string necklace revealing my great grandmother’s diamond encrusted locket. “You know, that locket deserves a beautiful golden chain.”

“Brian.” I took his hand in mine and held it against my cheek. “You know you don’t have to.”

“But I want to. Just imagine in, that scared locket chained up to a beautiful chain around that pretty neck of yours.” I blushed and pressed my head against his chest.

“You flatterer. You may not know your way around the dance floor but you have a way with words. No wonder you’re an astrophysicist. Speaking of which, you still got that tripod right?”

“Yeah. I still keep it cleaned, even though I’ll never be able to afford a telescope of my own for years if I’m lucky.” Oh little does he know.

“Well you never know. Santa has his ways.”

“You know love, it’s kinda weird how you still believe in Santa Clause even at your age.” Brian said. I let out a dramatic gasp.

“How dare you! You are never told old to believe in Father Christmas. Right Rog?”

“Damn straight! Just ignore your boyfriend (n/n), he thinks he’s too clever for Christmas.” Rog said as he took me away from Brian and wrapped an arm around my neck.

“Now hold on I didn’t—” a throat cleared and that’s when I saw a middle aged couple with their two small children.  The father who had a greying beard and wore some prescription circular glasses.

“Excuse me, we—we’re looking for a tree.” He said shyly.

“Oh did I hear you folks looking for a tree? Well step right over here and I’ll show you the best trees I’ve got!” Pete soon came in saying and guided the parents away from the smaller trees, right towards his prized 10ft.  I glared at him and turned to the guys.

“Think you both can find a tree yourselves?”

“No worries love. Do what you’ve got to do. I’ll see you tonight though right?”

“Of course. I’ll be over at your flat by 6pm on the dot. At least I’ll be on time unlike you are, yah scatterbrain.” He gave me that disapproving scowl (you know where he tilts his head down and his brow raises up and a deep frown crosses his lips). I giggled and pecked his lips and said, “You know I love you right?”

“With those insults I’m starting to doubt it.” He mocked.  I playfully swatted his arm which made him chuckle then I proceeded to follow the family to get them a more affordable tree.

After looking and looking through the very back of the lot, I had found the perfect tree that would suit the family just right.  I took it around to where Pete had his 10 footers displayed.

“I really am sorry madam but the rest of my trees have been reserved, these are the only ones I’ve got. You don’t want these kids going without a tree this year do you?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

“We are gonna get a tree? Aren’t we daddy?” the little girl around 5 years old said.

“But—this is all we have.” The father said as he took out what looked like one pound and threepenny pieces.

“Then that’s just enough for a down payment.” Mr. Pete said as he readied the contract.  Okay that’s it.

“Ugg excuse me!” I made myself known. “I’m sorry to interrupt but uhh—I managed to find this out back. It hasn’t been reserved or anything, maybe you and your family would like this.” I walked up with the tree and set it down.

The kids all ooed and awed at it, it was just slightly bigger than the two of them were.  The father shoved the contract back into Mr. Pete’s hands and he said to me joyously.

“We’ll take it! Oh thank you so much miss.”

“No problem, let me help you get this tree set up onto your car.” I took the father’s money for the tree and walked with them back to their car.

As they drove away waving and thanking me for the help, I waved goodbye back to them and wished them a Merry Christmas.  I counted up my tips and felt my heart skip a beat.

“I did it. I—I actually did it! Oh it’s finally enough to get Brian that telescope!” I cheered as I jumped up and down until a shadow came over me.  I stopped and slowly turned around and saw Mr. Pete seething down at me, his cigar bit between his yellow teeth.

“I HAD THEM HOOKED ONTO BUYING ONE OF MY TEN FOOTERS!!” he yelled in my face which made me slip and fall flat on my back in the snow. “And I’ve decided to take what I would’ve made out of your payment!” he snatched my bag of tips out of my hand.

“No let go of that! I need it for someone special’s Christmas gift!” I exclaimed as I tugged on the other end of it trying to take it back.

“Not. My. Problem!” he said.  With one final good yank, I was once again back in the snow as Mr. Pete pocketed my tip bag. “And just for the record. YOU’RE FIRED!!” he walked away from me with my bag of tips.  Not just from working at his lot but my waitressing job tips as well.

Of course I wasn’t upset about getting fired from the Christmas tree lot, I was just upset that all my hard work was now for nothing.  Guess I’ll be going to Brian’s empty handed.  I stood up, brushed the snow off my pants and walked away solemnly from the lot.

Thinking just how in the hell I’m gonna get Brian that telescope now.  There’s no way I could come up with the money by 4 o’clock today.

*Brian’s POV*

After picking out the perfect tree from the lot, Roger and I drove down back to the flat.  As we drove down the road I quickly said to Roger.

“Pull over.”

“What?”

“Just pull over Rog!” I snapped.  He muttered angrily and pulled the car into the pawnshop parking lot and I quickly stepped out and went up to the window and saw it.  The gold chain I’ve had my eyes on to give to (Y/n) to go with her locket.

“Forget it Bri, you’ll never afford it!” I heard Roger exclaim from the car.  I glared down and turned towards him.

“You underestimate me Rog.”

“All I’m saying is that we barely had enough to buy this tree. Trident is really screwing us over with our payment. John’s trying his best but he can’t seem to prove it legally. Yet.” He said to me.

“I know. It’s just I want to give (Y/n) the perfect gift this year. After everything that’s happened especially with my health, I want to show her just how much she’s meant to me. Without her I—I doubt I would even be standing here right now.”

“Now don’t go getting sappy on me now mate. (N/n) is a diamond in the rough, but you know she’s never wanted any riches or fame. All she ever says she needs in the world is you. God now you got me talking sappy! I hate you both sometimes!”

“Oh what? Mr. Hard-rocker can’t take a little sweetness in his life?” I teased as I got back in the car.

“Shut up or I’ll run your arse over.” He threatened.  I softly chuckled as Roger pulled away from the pawnshop.

Soon.  I’ll get that gold chain soon enough.  I just need to figure out a plan, but I only have 6 hours left so I need to think fast.

*My POV*

GRRRRR!!! Why can’t life be like a fairytale sometimes? I sure could use a fairy godmother right about now to give me enough money for Brian’s telescope.  I sat down at a nearby park bench and fiddled with my locket.

“(Y/n)?” I perked up my head. “(Y/n) darling is that you?” I looked up and there I saw Freddie with row upon row of shopping bags.

“Freddie? Wha…..what are you doing here?”

“Doing some last minute Christmas shopping. Of course shopping for that man of yours is a nightmare! Okay a living hell! No offense.”

“None taken. He—can be difficult to shop for at times.” I said solemnly.  Freddie cocked his head curiously like one of his cats and he asked me.

“You okay dear? No offense but you look like someone threw you in a dumpster and the dumpster spat you back out.”

“I could be better.” He came over and set his bags down at our feet and he said as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

“C’mon. You tell ol’ Freddie what happened darling? Why are you so down at this festive time of the year?”

“To put it bluntly, I got fired from Pete’s tree lot.”

“What?! Alright that’s it I am going to march straight down there and have a little chat with Mr. Pete.” I grabbed Fred’s arm and said.

“That’s not what’s bothering me though Fred. Honestly, I could care less whether or not I worked there next year or not.”

“Then what else happened that made you so sad?”

“If I tell you, will you promise not to tell Brian?” he gasped.

“Please tell me you’re pregnant.”

“What no! No! Fred that’s not it at all. You see, you know how Brian always has that empty tripod at yall’s flat?” he nodded. “Well I did some digging and found the perfect telescope that can go with his tripod. Since the start of the year I’ve been saving up all my tips just to get him that telescope. The tree lot’s really been helping my tips grow compared to my waitressing job. And today I managed to reach my goal.”

“Well that’s great so—”

“But that’s when Pete took my tip bag away. All of it.”

“What!? Why the fuck would he do something like that!?”

“Because I stopped him from selling this sweet family an expensive 10ft. tree. They knew they couldn’t afford it yet Pete was pressuring them. So I sold them a small and affordable tree and they were excited about what I showed them and took it. Pete said he was gonna take what he would’ve made off the tree out of my pay. So he took everything. My entire bag of tips that have been saved since this year.”

“That low-life…..you sure you don’t need me to go ‘speak’ to him?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore Fred. I only have 2 hours till the shop closes and no way of paying for that telescope. Now Brian will never be able to look up at the stars the way he dreams of doing.” I leaned my head against Fred’s shoulder and he wrapped his arms around me, gently rubbing my arm and pressed a soft kiss on top of my head.

“You know what I always found to be the cure for a sour face?” he asked me.

“What?”

“Trying on new clothes. C’mon let’s go down to BIBA and pick you something nice to wear for the party. My treat.”

“No, no Fred I can’t do that. Plus what about your shopping?”

“Ahhh I was done with it anyways. Now c’mon. Maybe taking your mind off of your sad morning will help you come up with a plan. And here why don’t you take this?” he reached down and grabbed one of his shopping bags. “It’s something I was planning on giving to that space man of yours, but it seems you need it more than I do.”

“Freddie I—I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you’ll take it. That way you can at least not feel guilty of coming to our flat empty handed. And maybe give me a sneak peek of what to expect from you for my Christmas present.”

“In your dreams Mercury. I never spill Christmas secrets.”

“Damn it!” he pouted.

“C’mon you, I was promised a shopping trip so I expect you to deliver.”

“Darling have you met me?” he stood up and I helped him with some of his bags and the two of us walked towards BIBA.

After finally getting into a warm store, I shivered and rubbed my arms frantically trying to get some friction on them and warm myself up.  Freddie and I then proceeded to try out some clothes.

Freddie was right. After awhile of trying out various types of clothing and giving Fred my personal opinion on what he could possibly wear for a future concert, I was starting to feel better.  Currently I was trying on a winter hat and looking at myself in the mirror.

“Hold everything (Y/n) darling! I’ve found the perfect thing for you!” I heard Freddie exclaim all the way from the other side of the store.  I buried my face under the hat as people looked towards me.  Fred came racing over to me and he held up a cute red Christmas shawl with little snowflakes on it.

“Oh my god this is cute!” Fred then tied it around my neck but tied it in a fashion knot, making sure my locket was the key feature showing above my shawl.

“Figured this could go great with your great-grammy’s locket. That thing is worth millions.”

“Yeah. Pure diamond encrusted and……” I trailed off. “That’s it. THAT’S IT!! Fred what time is it?!” I asked him urgently.

“Uhh it’s uhh…..10 till 4.”

“Uggh! There’ll be no time to get there by the road. Nevermind I’ll just run. Yeah run as fast as I can to the shop and get Brian’s telescope! Thanks Fred you’re the best but you can take Brian’s gift back I think I’ve found the perfect way to get Brian that telescope!” I ripped the shawl off my neck and handed it back to Fred and raced out of BIBA and ran as fast as I could.

Now running and snow are not a good combination but I couldn’t stop now.  Not even as I was slipping and sliding along the crosswalks, all that mattered to me was getting to that shop on time.  I would look up towards Big Ben to see how much time I had left and time was running short.

I still had about six blocks till I got to the shop and I was down to my final 3 minutes on the clock.  I soon spotted some teenager boys sledding up along some railings and bus benches.  I walked up to one of them and quickly asked them if I could borrow his sled for a moment.

At first he pondered on the though till finally he agreed to let me have it.  I told him where he could come collect it in the next five minutes and I proceeded to sled the rest of the way to the shop.

Now gaining some speed, I could see the shop just down the hill.  I took a deep breath and proceeded to slid down the street towards the shop but as I got halfway that’s when Big Ben began to gong out the next hour. GONG……GONG…..GONG…..GONG!

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! As I got to the bottom I saw the shop starting to close up, the lights went off and soon the old shopkeeper came out and locked up. I stood up and ran towards him.

“Wait sir wait!” he turned to me.  He was an elderly man roughly around his mid-60s, he wore prescription glasses and his hair was white and thinning, he also was growing out a small white beard.  “I—I was wondering if you’d be willing to make a trade?” I took my great-grandmother’s locket off my rope chain. “I was hoping to trade in this locket for that telescope you have on display. The 30 power Refractor one. It’s for my guy.”

He took the locket from my hands and observed it closely.  He hummed sadly and said.

“Sorry ma’am. That there is a pretty locket but it won’t do much in my shop.” He handed me back the locket and pocketed his keys. “Well, Merry Christmas.” He told as he began to walk away.

“Please sir this locket was a family heirloom. It belong to my great grandmother back in the early 1890’s. It’s diamond encrusted and pure gold you can see if for yourself.” I said walking alongside him, showing him the locket once again.  He sighed and told me.

“I know love but—what I sell in my shop is stuff people actually use in their lives. And as I said before as pretty and as valuable as that locket is, no one will want it in my shop.” I stopped and looked down heartbroken. He hummed sympathetically and continued as he placed a comforting hand on my shoulder “Tell you what, why not go down to the pawnshop across town and you can sell it there? Then once you got the money, come back here the day after Christmas and then we’ll discuss about that Refractor 30 power telescope.”

“But I need it by tonight. This was my last chance to get my Brian something special after the horrid year he’s had. I would give anything in the world to get him that telescope, even if it’s a precious family heirloom.”

“Anything?” he asked quizzically. “Tell me poppet what else are you planning on giving for that there telescope?” he said with his arms crossed.

“I’d give all my love if I could. As sappy as that sounds but it’s true. Brian he’s—” I looked towards the sky and could already see the first star in the sky. “He’s my shining star.” I heard the shopkeeper chuckle.

“Now that’s how you make a sale. Sure wish there were more young compassionate lovers like you and this man of yours. Reminds me of me and my wife Gertrude. God rest her soul. C’mon in come on in and we’ll discuss that trade.” I smiled and in my adrenaline of pure joy, I hugged the old man and heard him softly chuckle.

Later that night, I arrived at the boy’s flat ready for the Queen Christmas party.  The boys along with Mary, Veronica, and Roger’s girlfriend Jo were all there by the time I arrived.  We had a warm and delicious Christmas eve dinner and exchanged the gifts. First the guys gave out gifts to each other, then us girls proceeded to give our gifts to each other.

I had gotten Ronnie some baby clothes (yes she was a couple of months pregnant at the time and had given us the big announcement just a month ago).  I gave Jo a copy of her favorite Jimi Hendrix album, and as for Mary I got her some new makeup from the latest designer line.

I had gotten some winter hats and scarves from Mary, a copy of my favorite Shakespeare play from Ronnie, and Jo got me the new Beatles album.

After most of the gifts had been exchanged, I quickly went to the back of the tree and pulled out my gift for Brian.  I groaned and heaved it up.

“Jesus (n/n) what did you get him a pool table?” Roger asked as he lit up his cigarette.

“Ha-ha you’re hilarious Taylor.” I sassed sarcastically.  I then turned to Brian and I said to him, “Hey Bri, why don’t you go get that tripod out from your room?” he chuckled nervously and fiddled around with his shirt collar nervously as he said.

“Actually….why don’t you open yours first? And maybe even let us see that locket of yours. I don’t think Jo’s ever seen it before.” Now I started getting nervous.

“Oh she wouldn’t be interested in that old thing. Here, why don’t we open our gifts together?”

“At least do something!” Freddie and John both slapped Roger over the head making him exclaim in pain. Brian handed me my gift, a small but beautiful wrapped box with a gorgeous red bow, while I carefully handed him my giant box.

The two of us unwrapped our gifts and opened up the tops and my eyes widened as I let out a soft gasp.

“A—a gold chain to go with my……locket.”

“Oh my god (Y/n)! You got me the Refractor 30 power telescope for my—tripod.” Wait why did he trail off at the end? I turned to him and saw that he had a sorrow-filled expression on his face.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you like it?”

“Oh (Y/n) I love it. I really do, I’ve always wanted my own telescope it’s just—” he sighed heavily. “I just had to trade that old tripod to get you that gold chain.”

“What?”

“Pawnshop’s son was into space and he needed a tripod for his telescope. So I told the pawnshop owner that I had one since that one was practically collected dust instead of stars.” Oh Brian.

“And I traded my locket to get you that telescope.” Brian and everyone else softly gasped.

“Oh (Y/n), I can’t believe you would trade away a family heirloom for me.” Brian said.

“I would’ve given anything Brian. After—everything that’s happened this year. From your hepatitis scare, to the ulcer and even fear of losing your arm I—wanted to give you something special. I don’t care if it costed me an arm, leg or even my own heart. I would’ve done anything to at least see you smile that real Brian May smile I’ve come to love.”

He cupped the side of my face and brought me closer to him, our lips joining together in a soft, delicate, loving kiss.  Of course Roger and Fred just had to make it embarrassing by telling Bri to give me more tongue.

“Come with me.” He silently said urgently as he guided me out to the small backyard behind their flat. “There now we got some privacy away from the pests that is Freddie and Roger. I swear those two are mentally 5 years old 24/7.”

“Well Fred is, Rog is more like 3 years old.” He snorted out a soft laugh.

“Anyways what I wanted to bring you out here to tell you is that while I appreciate what you did to get me the telescope, you didn’t have to trade your locket. I know how much it meant to you.”

“I know but like I said earlier, I would’ve given anything to see you smile again.”

“Just being by my side is enough to make me smile.” He said as he cupped each side of my face, his calloused thumbs caressed my cheeks.  I smiled and he pressed his forehead against mine, our noses gently nuzzling against one another’s before he captured my lips in another kiss.

For the rest of the night, we all sang some Christmas songs, watched some Christmas films and when it got late we all decided to turn in for the night.  I was in Brian’s room, the two of us cuddled up close on his bed.

“I just hope by next Christmas we’ll have ourselves a house.” He said.

“Let’s take it one step at a time my love.” I said as I tucked my hand into his unbuttoned t-shirt softly stroking his collarbone and gave the junction between his neck and shoulder a kiss.  “For now I’m content to how this Christmas turned out.”

“Me too. Even though we basically recreated the gift of Magi tale.” I smiled and felt Brian kiss the top of my head which his fingers slowly stroked up and down my spine. “Happy Christmas my stardust.”

“Happy Christmas my space man.” Brian covered the two of us with his duvet and we fell into a peaceful slumber in his arms.

[hystericalcherries]

aeon (6/6)

Pairing: Keith/Lance Words: 10.5k Rating: M Warnings: mild violence Tags:  Post-Season/Series 07, quantum abyss, Flashbacks, Flashforwards, Prophetic Visions, Visions in dreams, Mind Control, Dimension Travel, Boys Being Boys, Falling In Love, Mutual Pining, Gay Keith (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron) when the going gets tough... the tough write fix-it fics, Allura (Voltron) Lives, because fuck you jds and lm

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Summary:

Keith does not leave the quantum abyss untouched.

“Home can be anything, you know,” Lance says in lieu of a conversation starter.

Slivers of moonlight filter through the blinds above their heads, casting lines of truth across the sheets. Lance tilts his head forward and a band slides over his eyes, catching the ocean in them and drawing Keith into their rolling tides. And as distracted as he is, he doesn't put up a fight when a hand clasps his own, reeling them heartward.

“Home is just something you can come back to.” His knuckles brush against the soft fabric of a nightshirt, the v-neckline falling loose to reveal a sharp collarbone, and Keith feels his breath hitching. “Something that keeps you grounded.”

READ IT ON AO3

The day of the Alliance Feast comes and Keith finds himself sulking in a corner as he watches an alien chat Lance up.

Allura had stuffed them all in Altean formal wear, color-coded and high-collared, capes draped tastefully across their shoulders. The material of the suits are surprisingly breathable despite all its excess, stretching and bunching up in just the right places to cut them all into impressive figures. The princess had been very particular in how she wanted them all to look and had forced herself into more than one fitting room back at the Garrison; Shiro’s hair is slicked back, Hunk’s headband folded into the pocket of his jacket, Keith’s loose ponytail tied with a red ribbon, Lance’s waist adorned by a silver chain and Pidge’s glasses exchanged for a sleeker pair. If the star-eyed looks they’ve been receiving ever since they landed on New Altea is anything to go by then she must have succeeded.

Lance, Keith must admit, looks particularly dashing. His suit makes his shoulders look broader and it’s a problem. More so because it’s obvious that the red paladin isn’t the only one to take notice, more than one individual coming forward to introduce themselves to the friendliest member of Voltron.

Keith glares.

The alien doesn't take the hint and keeps talking, going so far as to place one of their four hands on the blue paladin’s upper arm when they laugh. Lance looks pleased.

“You should go talk to him.”

A crick forms in his neck when he jerks to attention at Allura’s voice. She fills up the once empty space next to him, having somehow snuck up on him, wearing low heels and a pale pink dress; she looks the epitome of aristocratic, with jewels dripping across her collarbone and dangling from her ears. His heart jumps at her words when they finally register, unable to help the quick glance he sends to the tables. “No,” he says immediately, turning away when he catches the unilu delegate peering at him from over the blue paladin’s shoulder. “He looks fine where he is. I don’t want to butt in.”

The princess frowns, obviously displeased at his reluctance. She crosses her arms and juts out a hip in a move that’s far too Keith-ish in nature for his liking. “You know, Lance loves to dance and—”

“Awesome,” Keith grouses.

Allura glares. “—and I’m sure he would say yes to one if someone asked.”

There’s no denying that the blue paladin has had no shortage of dance partners; ever since the band had started playing the boy had been on and off the dancefloor, spinning past him with someone new every few minutes. Some bitterness sneaks into his tone when he says, “I’ve noticed.”

“Now that’s not fair. You’ve had all evening to make your move. Don’t be upset that others are doing what you can’t.”

The words sting and Keith isn’t quick enough to hide it.

Allura’s expressions soften and he bristles a bit, less at the thought of being the recipient of someone’s pity and more knowing that he’s actively doing everything to deserve it. “Keith,” she says, and it’s soft and encouraging. “You are one of the most courageous people I know and you’ve faced things far more imposing than this.” She ducks her head to look him in the face. “It’s just Lance.”

“I know,” he says eventually, making a visible effort to relax. He sighs. “I know. It’s just… I don’t want to mess it up.”

“There’s nothing to mess up,” she assures, touching his arm. “Lance is a fellow paladin and, more importantly, your friend. You’ve been through much together and nothing could break the bond you have because of it.” She pauses, carefully manicured hands digging into his sleeve. “And if he’s the one from those visions of yours then talking to him would be the first step towards the rest of your life.”

He really regrets telling her about the flashes.

“It’s him, isn’t it.” It’s more of a fact than a question and Keith can’t even conjure up the energy to deny it.

Lance laughs again.

At his silence, Allura gasps. “I knew it! Oh! How romantic! It’s just like those books Hunk recommended to me, but better because—well, this is real, isn’t it?” Her hands clap together excitedly. “To think, the history you share is just a precursor of what is to come. It must be destiny!”

“Allura,” he warns.

“If he is from the visions, then you mustn’t just talk to him. You have to dance with Lance too! Keith, you absolutely must!”

“I don’t think that’s the best idea.”

“And why not?”

“Because, well, we’re not… it’s complicated. Plus, I don’t really dance.”

Allura tuts at him, booping him on the nose as she takes on a tone of one talking to an ignorant toddler. “Not with that attitude, you don’t. Come on. It will be fun.”

“And what if I don’t wanna have fun?”

The princess purses her lips and she tugs at his sleeve impatiently. He resists when she makes a move to drag him away from his corner, twisting away from her with a scowl. Knowing of her strength and how it outmatches his by miles, he karate chops her other hand when it reaches out for him. She gasps, offended at his defiance, and then redoubles her efforts.

“Why must you be so difficult?” she growls, circlet slipping over one pointed ear as she shoves herself in his space. Her elbow digs uncomfortably in his gut as her other hand fumbles for the wrist of his hand. “I’m only trying to help.”

“Allura, I swear—”

“Well, don’t you two look cozy.”

The two freeze and it’s almost comical, getting caught like this—the red paladin and the altean princess, important figures in their own right, mid-scuffle and cursing at each other—yet Keith doesn’t laugh. Doesn’t laugh because while they had been arguing, a figure had snuck up on them. A figure with very broad shoulders.

Allura recovers first. “Lance!”

The boy belonging to the name smiles. “Mind if I cut in?”

“Of course!” Allura gushes, letting go of Keith and all but pushing him at the blue paladin regardless of the fact that he hadn’t specified who he wanted to dance with. She takes a moment to fix her appearance, smoothing down hair and adjusting her dress, looking haughty. “I’ve gotta find Coran and make sure he’s not overdoing it on the nunvill, so you boys enjoy yourselves.”

And with that, she leaves. Leaves Keith in the middle of a party with his bonafide first and only crush.

He looks up and meets Lance’s eyes. It’s been months since he came back from the abyss and the half inch he had over the other boy is gone now, making them eye level. He knows neither of them are done growing and their heights will continue to change but Keith finds that he likes it this way for now.

“So,” Lance starts, biting his lip. “Dance?”

A quick look across the hall and his stomach flutters nervously. “I’ve never really…”

But Lance is already moving right along, grabbing his hand and tugging him in the direction of the dancefloor. Dazed, Keith lets it happen, focus torn between their clasped hands and the back of the other’s head. The crowd parts easily for them, curious looks and whispers following at their heels only to be hastily hidden when he glances away from the pinking ears of his partner. Lance must be determined to ignore their audience, expertly spinning Keith around to face him and guiding their bodies in a starting position.

The music is already in full swing and Lance takes a step to match that of the other dancers, gently tugging Keith along in a strange mix of a waltz and shuffle, confident where he is stiff.

After maybe a half a minute where they steadily avoided each other’s eye, Keith speaks up. “Is this something we do now? Dance.”

Blue eyes flicker past his face and he doesn't have to imagine the silent conversation that's happening over his shoulder. Lightning quick he looks behind him, but, much to his chagrin, Hunk has already schooled his expression from where he sits at one of the many tables and is staring back at him with all too innocent eyes.

Lance clears his throat and Keith turns back to a nervous smile. “Yeah, I thought we could try it out… See how you—er, we feel about it.”

There must have been something in the drink he had earlier of his because Keith can feel himself melting.

“It’s nice,” he says, watching as the other boy’s smile turns into something more lighthearted. “I’m not very good but, yeah, it’s… it’s nice.”

Eyes twinkle in the warm light. “I think it’s nice too.”

There’s a bit of a hitch in the music and Keith spies a few of the musicians being switched out, exchanging string instruments for ones that look like a cross between trumpets and accordions. It must be getting later in the evening because some of the dancers leave, replaced by a much younger crowd. He spots a few familiar faces, both humans—Atlas technicians, old classmates, Garrison faculty—and aliens—bounty hunters, altean colonists, royal dignitaries—all unabashedly shedding their professional appearance in exchange for a good time. The energy pulses upwards, pushing them closer together and causing the weird rumbling in Keith’s chest to give way to butterflies, transparent wings brushing along the inside of his ribs in a way that has his heart thumping madly.

When the song increases in tempo Keith accidentally steps on Lance’s foot. He cringes. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Lance assures. ”Just lighten your steps and pretend it’s a training session. Move with me, not against me.”

Keith tries the step again and nearly trips over his own feet when he miscalculates how many times his partner would step back, causing a table of girls nearby to twitter with amusement at the sight of him. Lance doesn’t mock him for his clumsiness, just adjusts his hand so it presses a bit lower on his back; Keith feels the touch like a brand, barely catching onto the way his palm shifts in accordance to the next step.

It gives Keith something to focus on and, eventually, he falls in line with the steps.

“See? You’re a natural.”

Keith snorts and Lance grins, proud. “Not really—not like you anyway. How did you get to be so good?”

“I'm Cuban,” he says as a means of explanation, swinging his hips leisurely with the beat a drummer starts playing, obviously enjoying himself. It’s… distracting. Especially when the song changes to something with more bass and he lines their bodies together, starting up a heavy sway that Keith falls into after the initial jerk of surprise. Then there’s a thigh fitting between his legs and Lance is letting go of one hip to guide his gloved hand to the small of his back, casual as can be as the boy rolls back into the touch.

“This is, um.” Keith takes in a shaky breath. “I’ve never done this before.”

“Yeah, I don’t think there are many opportunities for this out in the desert. You really missed out—the Garrison dances always ended up this way. Didn’t matter how many chaperones they assigned.” Lance’s voice is level with his ear, their cheeks brushing as they move to the music, causing goosebumps when he feels the contradictory smooth-roughness of the other’s freshly shaved skin. “But we’ll count this as making up for all the ones you missed. Better late than never, right?”

Breathing is difficult but Keith manages it, if only just. “Right.”

Lance makes a noncommittal hum, pressing closer to let a couple trip pass them. Keith watches them go from his view over Lance’s shoulder, only slightly scandalized when the shorter alien unabashedly slips a hand over their date’s backside. It causes his hand to twitch, the pad of his thumb finding the indent of his partner’s lower back through his suit. With a startling clarity, Keith realizes how far his hand has fallen and tenses, waiting for Lance to notice and take offense.

But nothing happens. No one comments on how close the two paladins have gotten, probably because they aren’t the only ones to do so. The dancefloor is a mesh of bodies, all moving to whatever dance they know and hiding them from the view of the spectators sitting at the tables. He’s not pushed away in disgust, nor is he laughed at. Instead, Lance drapes his free arm over Keith’s shoulder, smoothing down the baby hairs at the back of his neck.

It gives Keith the courage to glance over; he spies half-lidded eyes and a warm flush under golden skin. Enticed by the fluttery feeling low in his gut, he settles his remaining arm over the other’s bicep, just above the edge of his elbow-length gloves. A slow inhale, followed by an even slower exhale, and the pulse under his fingers jumps.

He’s never been held like this before, as if he was the beginning of an addictive end.

The song—the fifth they had danced to and Keith deliriously wonders where the time had gone—starts to come to a climax, and Lance stirs. He looks at the band, then the other dancers and then Keith. There’s something in his eyes and it’s like taking a deep breath before diving under, adrenaline-inducing, willing to be pulled wherever the current takes him. The moment builds like a cresting wave—higher and higher, curling with seafoam and impending desire—until Keith is sure that they're going to crash together, that he’s going to lean in closer and kiss him. Involuntarily, he slips his eyes closed.

“And now, the big finish!”

His eyes fly back open. "What—"

But Lance is already twisting them around and throwing himself backwards. And Keith has no choice but to hastily lean with him, biceps flexing as he tightens his grip around Lance’s waist and hastily puts pressure between his shoulder blades. The top of his head barely misses cracking against the floor. Still, Lance cackles like it’s great fun.

“I can’t believe that worked,” Lance says too loudly when they’re back to standing normally, clapping with the rest of the crowd as the band announces their fifteen minute break. The moment officially over. “I usually drop my partners when I try to dip them.”

“That was embarrassing.”

“Eh, you liked it.”

A little called out, Keith hunches his shoulders and scowls. “I did not.”

But Lance goes on like he didn’t say anything, giving him a million-watt smile. “We did pretty well, all things considered. Probably cause we make such a good team.”

And how is Keith supposed to keep things together when he goes and says things like that? All sincere and butterfly-inducing. “Yeah,” he tells the boy, feeling brave and scared and more than himself, making it so that the back of their hands brush. “We really are.”

After that the party winds down.

The crowds thin and people start saying their goodbyes, respectful salutes paving way for hearty handshakes and more than one inebriated embrace. There seems to be a line forming in front of Allura, everyone wanting a final word with the princess before the night is officially over; Keith merely gives a wave as he and Lance pass her by towards where Hunk and Pidge dally around the buffet table, thinking nothing of the quick smile she gives in return before looking at the diplomat talking to her, knowing that he’ll see her tomorrow at their usual movie night.

Hunk is polishing off his plate of what looks to be pigs in a blanket while Pidge shoves leftover hors d'oeuvres into her shoulder pack. “I’ve got to get this recipe,” the former is saying when the pair come within hearing distance, looking up at the sound of their footsteps and doing a triple take before not-so-subtlety nudging his smaller companion with his elbow. With both gazes trained on them, Hunk gives a too-innocent smile. “Looks like you guys had fun. How was the dancefloor?”

“Crowded,” Keith replies at the same time Lance says, “Cozy.”

The yellow paladin’s eyes flicker between them. “Okay, yeah. Well, we were gonna head out soon… Are, um, you guys gonna…”

“It is getting pretty late,” Lance agrees, leaning forward to steal the last bit of the food from Hunk’s plate before slipping around Keith and draping an arm across his shoulders. He pops the finger food into his mouth and makes a show of chewing loudly when Keith frowns. “You’re going back to the Atlas, right?” he asks him, oblivious or uncaring of the two pairs of eyes that dissect the entire interaction. “Do you think I could hitch a ride with you? I’m staying with Veronica tonight and I think she already left.”

“Sure.”

“Cool.” Lance leans away far enough that he nearly topples the two of them over and Keith has to lightly brace his hand on the other’s waist to better balance them. “See you later, paladudes.”

They four exchange fist bumps and then the red and blue paladin are angling themselves towards the exit, Keith trying not to combust when their arms stay wrapped around each other. More than one eye sticks to them and even more bodies put themselves in front of them to give a deferential goodbye; Lance takes it in stride, giving a sincere wave here and an over-the-top wink there, and it more than makes up for Keith’s own stilted replies. He only blunders once and that’s when Shiro catches his eye over the brim of a champagne glass, smile smug and unbearable.

Finally, they make it to the building’s transport dock where the Black Lion sits docilely.

The forcefield dissipates before Keith even asks and there’s a low rumble in greeting when the pair walk up the ramp, which Lance reciprocates with a light pat to one of the wall panels before following Keith to the cockpit. Then it’s just a means of setting a course to the Atlas and watching the stars pass them by as the mechanical lion does the rest.

The Atlas is empty save for the night shift, all of whom pause in their work up in the control room to watch the Black Lion land and the two paladins that exit it make their way across the room. It is almost eerie how their footsteps sound like a military march in comparison to absolute quiet that reigns once the cabin pressurizer comes online but Keith doesn’t give himself any time to consider it, not when he has a preferable distraction walking alongside him. Lance fills in the silence easily, looking princely as he charms Keith with anecdotes of parties past, laughing alongside him as he recalls the time he had won the Winter Formal crown and the resulting awkward dance that had followed, set to an early century song that he attempts (and fails) to beatbox. It makes the trip up to the floor with their quarters all the more enjoyable and when it’s over, Keith wishes it wasn’t.

Lance flashes a smile at him. “Night, Samurai.”

He sighs in return. “Night, Sharpshooter.”

Then the boy is turning around, disappearing down the hallway with only one look over his shoulder. And Keith, not wanting to look more foolish than he already has by getting caught staring at the spot his crush had occupied, quickly unlocks his door and slips inside.

His mother is in the kitchen, slicing up something that looks like a blue tomato, and looks up when he lingers in the doorway. “You’re back,” she says neutrally, transferring the food to a serving platter and pointedly ignoring the cosmic wolf that watches her every move, drool starting to collect at the base of his largest molar. “How was the party?”

He shrugs. “It was alright.”

“Just alright?”

He shuffles away and into the living room, collapsing onto the couch. His neck cranes back, giving him a perfect view of the ceiling tiles. There’s a scorch mark in the top-right corner from when Kosmo had mistaken one of Krolia’s blasters for a chew toy. He squints at it, thinking, and his mind instantly snags onto the phantom brush of thighs and the strum of an alien guitar. Mouth dry and more than a little embarrassed, he squeezes his eyes shut.

The couch dips slightly and then a clawed hand is stroking his hair, pushing his bangs out of his face and behind his ear. The gesture quells the loud noise in his chest and he lets his head dip to the side, heated cheek squished against the cool felt of the couch.

“It was maybe more than alright,” he finally answers. For some reason, it’s this admission that had him blushing and curling his toes in secondhand gratification. “I had fun, more fun than I thought I would have anyway.”

“I’m glad to hear it.”

She doesn’t ask, but he knows she wants to know. Better yet, he wants to tell her.

“Everyone was there.”

She hums and continues to comb through his hair.

“Shiro, Pidge and Hunk and Allura. Lance too.” A pause where he clears his throat, far from casual. “We danced.”

“That sounds nice.”

“Yeah, it was—nice.”

They sit in silence for a bit and his mind lingers on the dance he had shared that evening. He plays it on loop, going over every detail until he could sketch it out on paper, framed and made all the more real. Eventually Krolia stops her grooming in favor of offering him a slice of the strange fruit; he takes it and plops it into his mouth without question, surprised at the sweet taste.

“It’s weird, feeling this way,” he says absently, grounded but with his head in the clouds. “Weird that this is where I am. That life’s like this now.”

“The universe works in mysterious ways,” she tells him with a hum and he would scoff at such a cliche saying if it weren’t for the way his mother says it so genuinely. “Sometimes, it takes a lifetime and a half to find your place in it. I’m glad you’ve found yours.”

The flashes start coming faster and—

—Lance’s warm hand in his as they walk through a line of stalls selling alien wares. Merchants offering gossamer scarfs the same shade as the rising sun and jewelry that shines like they’ve been plucked straight from the night sky. Gaggles of children running through the streets, laughing as they dodge through the crowds. An ornate dagger purchased and gifted—

—fingers gently rubbing a sticky substance over the stretch of his cheek while a voice drones on about the benefits of skincare—

—his shoulder leaned against a doorway as he watches Lance address a class full of recruits, eyes twinkling when they catch sight of him hidden in the shadows. The loud trill of a bell and the shuffle of children eager for lunch, tempered by the arms wrapped around his neck and the kiss bestowed on his cheek—

—the shudder that goes through him as they rock into each other, skin sweaty and breathes loud. Hands gripping his thighs and his teeth nipping at an exposed neck, leaving marks so the world would know who they belonged to, now and to the end. Words whispered in the dark just as stars burst across his vision—

—eyes connecting over a crowd, secretive and happy—

—Keith fumbling with the black box in his pocket as he paces their room, repeating the words he wants to say to the man that he loves, nervous and excited and everything that comes after—

—he never wants them to stop.

They are hanging out in Keith’s room three days after the ball, sitting on the floor and leaning against his bed as they enjoy each other’s presence. Between them, Kosmo rolls onto his back, expecting belly rubs now that they’re no longer distracted by the show they had been watching, ending credits rolling after twenty-three minutes of terrible storytelling and bad animation. Lance is talking with the assumption that Keith will listen, going on loudly about how his character in the show is the main protagonist while delivering pats to the space wolf.

And Keith is… distracted.

Distracted in a sense that he can’t focus—or rather, he can’t stop focusing. On the energetic hand gestures and the expressive emotions that flit across Lance’s face as he speaks, pausing intermittently in order to coo at Kosmo and ask his opinion on things, always answered with a happy pant and an excited tail wag that has the blue paladin nodding sagely before continuing. He focuses on the way he feels now, in this moment, content like he’s never felt before.

A wet tongue licks a stripe up Lance’s cheek and he rears back, half disgusted, half charmed, and Keith can’t keep quiet any longer. Just blurts out, “We should do something this weekend.”

His friend blinks owlishly. “What?”

There’s fire coursing through his veins, invigorating him. It gives him courage to continue, to make so that the flashes are no longer flashes but memories. “I said we should do something this weekend. Do something together.”

“Yeah, okay.”

The casualness of the answers makes him think that the boy doesn’t quite understand the request. Assumes what he’s asking is for something they’ve always done. They hang out all the time, yes, but this is different. He wants this to be different.

“No, I mean we should go out this weekend.” Keith sends him a certain look, waiting for Lance to catch on.

He doesn’t catch on. “Huh?”

Dark eyes roll toward the ceiling and Keith shakes his head, and there’s that something again and oh, it’s fondness—it’s a look of fondness quirking his lips.

“What I’m saying is…” He takes a quick moment to shift on his hip so that their knees are almost touching and, after a moment of consideration, Keith slides his hand down and over until the tips of their pinkies bump into each other. “We should go out this weekend, like go on a ride out to town. Whatever you want, really.”

Lance’s blinks once, twice, three times, and—there. Comprehension floods and it takes only half a second before a high pitched noise scratches out of the boy’s throat. His eyes are wide, comically so, and he stares at Keith, mouth parting in an eclipse of a red moon. Then, just as Keith is committing the image to memory, he snaps his mouth shut and visibly shakes himself. “O-okay, I see. You mean like a scouting mission, right? For any lingering drones out in the desert. Well, yeah, um, as long as it’s okay with Shiro—”

“No,” he quickly cuts off, partially frustrated at the gap in communication and partially embarrassed that they would need clearance for what he has in mind. “I meant—a ride together—as in, you and me. No mission. Just us… together.”

The boy swallows loudly and Keith tracks the moment involuntarily.

"Oh.”

A lapse follows, not uncomfortable, but full. Keith buzzes in the aftertaste of his impromptu proposition and holy hell, he just asked Lance out. They’ve still yet to talk about the ball and how they had danced all night, and, despite the looks they receive from their teammates, neither of them have been brave enough to breach the silent agreement of keeping whatever feelings they had to themselves. However, now everything threatens to burst. His heart finally catches up to his words, beating in overdrive as he waits for an answer. But Lance seems not to care for the nervousness pulsing in his veins or the butterflies fluttering in the base of his stomach because he keeps up the uncharacteristic silence. It remains that way for a solid thirty seconds, until, finally, Keith can't take it anymore.

He clears his throat. “So, is that a yes?”

Lance jerks to attention, looking caught. “I, uh, what?”

“Do you want to go?”

Something incredible happens then. It’s wild and previously unthinkable, but Lance blushes.

He blinks and his vision doubles, half of it going auburn in a wash of caribbean light. He is by the waterfront, the sound of crashing waves dissolving into background noise when compared to the breathy laugh that washes over his face. Darkened cheeks lift in a smile that crinkles eyes and Keith goes a bit red himself at the image. The flash indulges him in a scene of utter bliss; velvety sand and supple lips, parting against his own.

Without thought he leans in, chasing the moment not yet passed. It causes present Lance’s eyes to go wide and it’s nothing like the cool burn of his half lidded gaze on the beach, salt drying on his lashes and sun-born freckles prickling his cheeks.

“I—ah, um. I—I’ll go.”

“Yeah?”

Lance looks away and then back. His voice is the quietest he’s ever heard. Almost shy. “Yeah.”

And it really is that easy.

The days go by slow after that, drawling in an agonizing pace. Second by second, minute by minute, hour by hour. Nearly stagnant, Keith hangs under time’s dispassionate influence, watching the clock and willing it to move. It’s a blessing when it finally hits five o’clock on the following Saturday. He stops the pacing he had been doing for the past hour and checks his reflection for the sixth time in as many minutes, tucking and untucking his shirt and running a hand in his hair in an futile attempt to tame it. When the results only further his agitation he gives up, collecting his nerves to the best of his ability making his way out the door with the intention of a quiet getaway.

Which makes him startle when he runs into Romelle outside his door, hand raised and poised to knock. “Keith! I've been sent to retrieve you!” He sees her gaze flicker down to take in his outfit—his cleanest pair of jeans, a corded necklace with a hanging Marmora pendant, and a leather jacket so new that its tag is stuffed in his back pocket—and he stops himself from turning back around and locking himself in his closet till the end of time. “Dinner is almost ready and Coran has made the most spectacular—”

“Actually,” he interrupts, unable to maintain eye contact, “I’ve got other plans.”

Romelle opens her mouth, but Keith, knowing the girl’s knack for rambling, is already speeding through the hallway.

Unfortunately for him, the living room is not as empty as he had previously thought. The yellow and green paladin are sitting on the couch, surrounded by a hurricane of blankets and pillows, the leftovers of a raid on Shiro’s candy stache sprawled across the coffee table.

“Aw, Keith, you look nice. What’s the occasion?”

Pidge looks up and over her screen, lips curling in a sly grin that instantly puts Keith on edge. “Yeah, Keith, where are you going?”

“Nowhere,” he says immediately. Then, “Out.”

“Out with Lance I bet. Isn’t your date today?”

Hunk gasps. “You guys are going on a date?”

“How did you…?” He spots his phone on the couch next to her and huffs angrily, stomping over and snatching it back. He quickly unlocks it, frowning when his last conversation with Lance immediately pops up, the other boy having sent a barrage of emojis in affirmation that their outing was still on. “Stop looking through my stuff and for the last time, we aren’t—it’s not a date. We’re just going for a ride, maybe check out the town market. It’s whatever.”

“I don’t know, that sounds a lot like a date to me. Hunk, any thoughts?”

Hunk has just one. “It’s totally a date.”

Heat flushes his cheeks. “Don’t you have your own quarters? Why are you even here?”

Pidge leans back, priggish smirk still in tact. “Matt and N-1 are having their rebel friends over and I didn’t want to third-wheel it, so Shiro said I could crash here for the night.”

Keith internally curses Shiro and his mother hen tendencies. Outwardly, he searches for the key card he’s pretty sure he left on the table the night before. His hair falls into his face as he ducks to check under the furniture and he brushes it back behind his ear, thinking maybe it would be more manageable in a ponytail.

“Look at him.” Pidge snickers. “What a schmuck.”

Hunk shushes her with a light pat of the arm. “I think it’s sweet. It means he cares. And don’t you worry Keith, I’m sure Lance will appreciate the effort you put into today. It’s also perfectly normal to be nervous for your first date— ”

“I’m not nervous and it’s not a date.”

Their response is lost when he goes to the office in the next room and searches there. But it’s all for naught because Shiro is a veritable mess when it comes to anything other than flying because there are papers scattered everywhere and it would take hours to file through even half of it.

When he comes back out, Allura has joined them. She perks up at the sight of him, but he ignores her in favor of checking in between the cushions of the armchair. However, Allura is not deterred. “Keith, Pidge and Hunk have just informed me of your date with Lance. If I may, I have some suggestions—”

“I don’t need any suggestions. I just need to leave or I’ll be late.” Pidge squawks indignantly when Keith shoves her to check her side of the couch.

“Yes, you’re right! Punctuality is very important for these types of things. Early duflax gets the wyvin, as Coran always says.” It seems pointless to mention that not once has he ever heard Coran say that. “But if I could impart some advice before you go. Now, I don’t know much about Earthen mating rituals, but Pidge tells me that courting is a common practice here— ”

“I’m not listening.”

“—gifts are imperative for a successful—”

“Can’t hear you.”

“—when you present, do so when tensions are high—”

“Allura, please, stop.”

“—and then, finally, you must lay claim—”

“I’m leaving,” Keith announces loudly, trying and failing to drown out the giggles that come from Hunk and Pidge’s side of the couch. Forget the keycard. It’s not worth this pain. “Bye. I hope you all have a terrible day.”

They are unfazed by his words, grinning like madmen as they wave. He stalks out of the room, shoulders hunched all the way to his ears as he desperately tries to block out the kissy noises Pidge is making. He can’t believe there was a time he was worried that they would be out of his life; he must have been having an existential crisis or something because this is a new level of embarrassing.

He’s so consumed in his thoughts that he nearly barrels into Shiro on his way out. It’s only the steady grip of his automated arms that Keith doesn’t crack his head against the doorframe and give himself a concussion.

“Whoa there. You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just…”

“Looking for this?”

There, dangling from Shiro’s prosthetic fingers, is a familiar key card.

Keith lets out a deep breath, a whisper of relief cooling down the anxious fire within him by a few degrees. He sends his oldest friend a strained smile and takes them. “Yeah, thanks. Where did you find them?”

“Under the couch with one of my shoes, the holoscreen remote, Hunk’s headband, and Allura’s earrings. It seems like Kosmo’s starting a life of crime.”

He lets out a chuckle, unraveling just a little less. “I should probably put a stop to that.”

Shiro nods, patting his back in that sorta awkward, manly sort of way. It’s encouraging and he steps past the other man with a deep breath. Feeling more like himself, he secures the key card to his belt loop and turns to head down the corridor, promising himself that he’ll only start running when there’s no one to catch him doing it.

“Oh, Keith?”

Keith whips around, nerves already reinflating. “Yeah?”

Shiro fails to keep his smile in check. “Have fun on your date.”

And before he can even begin to retaliate, the door is sliding shut and he’s left there, standing in an empty hallway, red to his tips.

Lance looks nice. Really nice. Really, really, really nice. It’s actually a little distracting how nice he looks.

They had met up at the east end of the loading docks and Keith had fought to keep his cool when he had spotted the tall form of his fellow paladin casually leaning against a security rail. His white v-neck and ripped jeans contrasted with the industrial setting, his denim jacket faded and adorned with a couple of pins, sleeves rolled up to showcase the collection of beaded bracelets wrapped around his left wrist. But what had truly pulled it all together was the smile he had sent Keith upon noticing him.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hi,” Lance returns. “You clean up good, Mullet.”

The compliment flusters him a little and he nearly walks straight into a support beam, only just managing to avoid it with a side-step that brings him close enough to brush shoulders with Lance. “Thanks. You, uh, you too.”

Unsure of what to say next, he ducks his head and leads them to the area the coordinator had assigned him when he had called in the favor. Section A-26 is large and the usual aircraft that docks there is nowhere to be seen; instead, there his hoverbike sits, scavenged from the Blue Lion’s cave and restored to its previous glory. He hoists himself up into the seat with practiced ease and looks down at Lance expectantly.

Pink tints the other boy’s cheeks, but there’s this mischievous smile on his face as he asks, “Why do you get to drive?”

“Because I’m the one that knows where we’re going.”

“Wow, you actually have a plan. Um, okay, then where are we going? Or is that top secret?” He bounces where he stands, looking for all the word: giddish.

“It wasn’t until you asked.”

Lance looks pleased at the response and climbs up behind Keith.

The hoverbike dips a little at the uneven dispersion of weight and he offers his hand as a brace, blushing faintly when it’s taken. But thankfully, Lance doesn’t see, focused as he is on swinging a leg over the seat and scooting close enough to Keith that his chest brushes sparingly at his back. Then hands are wrapping around his middle, loose, and it’s embarrassing how responsive Keith’s body is to the touch, rolling in one long shiver that’s unmistakable. If Lance notices he doesn’t comment on it.

“Ready to roll,” he says, breath ghosting over the shell of his ear.

Keith puts on the goggles hidden in the front compartment and passes the extra pair he brought to his back seat passenger. Then it’s a matter of twisting the throttle and feeling the engine come to life beneath them, four hundred pounds of metal under his control. And it’s like it was just yesterday he was speeding across the desert with Shiro, tasting freedom for the first time, his hands gripping the handles like they were always meant to; the circumstance has changed but the feeling hasn’t and Keith, with the luxury knowing that he’s got time on his side, grins and drives.

“Woah!” Lance exclaims when Keith tears out of the loading docks, erupting into laughter when they take a sharp turn at the gates of the Garrison compound and startle the men stationed there.

Then it’s just the open desert road, flat and red-tinged. The torrid heat follows at their backs, rolling alongside tumbleweeds and whistling in the wind that buffets the nose of the hoverbike. Dust swirls under the speeder's anti-gravity fenders, curling over the shadowy silhouettes of cacti that they fly past. It brings the beds of the distance buttes into startling focus, massive against the clear sky and infinite horizon.

It takes twenty minutes to get to their destination.

Keith parks at the outskirts of the town nearest to the Galaxy Garrison, waiting for Lance to dismount before following. Their shoulders brush a bit as they stand side by side, Keith eyeing Lance as he eyes their surroundings curiously. The town market is already in full swing, tents set up and people bustling about, buying and selling wares; already, more than one individual behind a stand is calling out to them, offering a discount if they buy in bulk.

“I thought we could walk around a bit?” he says, hoping that the idea isn't too lame. “And after—well, there’s an arcade in the plaza a few streets down and they’ve got pizza.”

His fears are unfounded because Lance just grins. "Pizza not made out of green goo? Count me in."

Things go smoothly after that. The anxiety bubbling in Keith’s chest eases and it allows him the strength to grab Lance’s sleeve and tug him in the direction of a tent hosting a repository of wind chimes. From tent to tent, they go; browsing at board games from planets even they haven’t been to, giggling over misspelled words on shirts, daring each other to try gross-looking foods and petting every dog they see.

And it’s… fun. Keith is having fun.

Lance is great. He’s nice and funny and smart and actually seems to enjoy hanging out with Keith. He nods along when Keith speaks, insanely attentive, and offers his own input with great enthusiasm. They bicker too, playful jabs volleyed back and forth, easy and natural like it never was in the beginning but is now. And although Keith has never thought himself to be an overly funny guy, he finds that pulling a laugh out of his fellow paladin isn’t all that hard and even sort of a reward on all on its own.

It’s like they fit, slotting together like puzzle pieces—or flashes.

“Hey, Keith?” Lance’s hand finds Keith’s elbow. He had discarded his jacket just before they started eating, which is doing nothing to help the hot flush rushing to the apple of his cheeks. The corded muscles of forearms on display is near impossible to ignore and Keith’s eyes follow the dips and curves of his arm, the hard muscle leading up to his shoulder, the soft line of his neck, the defined jawline. “Your fries are getting cold.”

It’s the touch that has him pulling out of the confines of his thoughts, physically shaking his head and straightening his shoulders, not wanting to appear anything less than invested.

Naturally, the world seems to think Keith can’t have a single nice thing without a price because it’s just a few minutes into their meal that his phone starts to blow up with messages. A quick glance shows that most are from his mother, with a few from Shiro sprinkled in intermittently. All of the messages are ones of encouragement, some having been sent while they were driving and others steadily ignored when the two had browsed the stalls of the market.

Eventually all the small pings get to be enough that Keith has to silence his phone.

“You’re really popular today,” Lance notes, slathering an alarming amount of ranch onto his pizza. It’s only when he drowns the unsuspecting slice that he catches Keith’s surprised and guilty look that he elaborates, “Dude, your phone has been lighting up all day. I’d be blind not to notice.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s cool.”

Still, Keith feels the need to explain. “It’s Shiro and my mom. They’re… checking up on me.”

That gets a light laugh out of Lance. He brings out his own phone, showing Keith the mass of notifications on his lock screen. “I get that. I’ve gotten at least five texts asking if you’re secretly an axe murderer. I hope three years in space is enough time to confidently say that I wasn’t lying when I told them you weren’t. Would really put a damper on the day.”

“I don’t even own an axe.”

Lance’s grin grows and when he puts away his phone to continue eating, he doesn’t reclaim the few inches of space he had given away in order for Keith to see the screen. Their elbows knock a few times, but Keith doesn’t mind.

They leave the plaza in a good mood, making their way back to the hoverbike while they talk about nothing and everything. They only stop when they mount the vehicle and when Lance doesn’t ask Keith where they’re going he decides that he doesn’t want the day to be over quite yet, so he revs the throttle and heads toward the direction he knows his shack is. He eventually leads them to a hill that he and his father used to frequent when he was younger, an escape from the world long before the stars were something to shoot for.

It’s an easy hike up the hill and when they settle by the edge, their pinkies are touching.

“You can’t do that,” he says on their fourth game of tic-tac-toe when Lance brushes the dirt and erases his wobbly X, shifting it over a spot so that it blocks Keith’s next move. “That’s cheating.”

“No, Keithy boy, that’s what I call winning.”

“This isn’t a competition.”

“Isn’t it?” Que pursed lips and a sly side-eye. “If it’s not, then why did you dress up for today, huh? Trying to one up me in style too?”

“This is what I usually wear.”

“Pah-lease. Like I don’t know Shiro’s handiwork when I see it. Dude’s got an eye for colors and he did you a solid keeping with the red. Bet he put up such a fuss when you kept the fingerless gloves—they scream embarrassing scene phase that never really went away.” Lance laughs when he doesn’t immediately counter the accusation and it must fuel him because he continues. “I bet you were upset when you couldn’t find any eyeliner for our date—”

As if struck by lightning, Keith straightens.

“—probably used it all up making yourself look like an edgy, space raccoon going to some street race—”

Our date, Lance had said. He had called this a date. They were on a date right now. Officially. The two of them, together.

“—being emo. But, I mean, whatever works, you know? Sometimes you just gotta paint your nails black and—mmph!”

Keith’s kiss lands on his upper lip, hard and dry.

It’s quick, over and done within a matter of seconds. Lips tingling and heart hammering, Keith pulls back, soul leaving his suddenly flushed body when he realizes he can still feel the other’s breath on his face. He must remain in his catatonic state for longer than he realizes because then Lance’s giving him this particular frown and saying, “What was that?”

With nothing else to do, he shrugs helplessly. “It was a kiss.”

“I know what a kiss is.” Eyes search his. “Why did you kiss me? ”

“I wanted to,” he says simply. “Was that not okay?”

“No, that wasn’t… No, it was cool.”

“Cool,” Keith repeats.

Lance scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah. I liked it.”

“Me too,” he adds, looking down. A good portion of their game has been accidentally wiped away and he redraws it, purposefully putting all the X’s and O’s in their respective spots before Lance had decided to remake the rules. He nudges the other boy’s foot with his own, biting back a smile when they’re hooked together. “We can, um, stay here? If you want?”

“I’d like that.”

They stay long enough to watch the sun dip under the horizon.

As dates go, it’s the best he’s ever had.

Later, when he’s home and high off the promise of a second date, he walks into the kitchen to find his friends congregated despite the late hour.

“So,” Allura starts as soon as he walks in, boots loud on the linoleum floor, trying to appear casual as she leans against the counter and just failing. It doesn’t help that the space mice are nearly tripping over her hair as they peer at Keith from over her shoulder, adding four tiny pairs of eyes to the many already scrutinizing his every move. “You’re back awfully late.”

Romelle is no better, inspecting her nails even as her ears twitch in his direction. “Yes, how did it go?”

There’s a plate of cookies on the island counter, comically shaped like the lions and dressed in an assortment of colors. He picks up the only red one on top and bites into it, humming at its surprising sweetness. Knowing his audience still expects an answer, he attempts an aloof shrug and nails it. “It was fine.”

There’s a pause and Keith can tell something is coming. He doesn’t know what exactly, but the warning signs are all there, flashing neon when Allura steeples her fingers and gives him a look.

“And the other… thing?”

“What other thing?”

“Why your kiss with Lance, of course.”

He nearly drops the sweet in his hand and immediately goes to look through the kitchen pass-through, spotting the rumpled state of the pillows and blankets by the living room window looking out to the barrack’s hallway. That and the smudge of chocolate on the window sill, coupled with the candy wrappers sticking out of Pidge’s hoodie pouch, can only mean one thing. “Were you watching?”

“No,” Romelle and Hunk immediately deny just as Allura and Pidge say, “Yes.”

Keith fumbles for a plausible reaction. His friends had undoubtedly seen the goodbye kiss that had been exchanged between him and Lance when the latter had insisted on walking him home; it had been a memorable kiss and Keith had maybe lost himself to it for longer than he’s willing to admit, but that’s something else entirely. A little helplessly, he searches the room for a means of end for this absolute embarrassment. He finds none. “That’s—I can’t believe—uncool!”

“Lance texted me almost immediately after,” Hunk offers, as if that makes up for his eavesdropping and then denial of said eavesdropping. “He hasn’t stopped talking about how you sprung one on him. You don’t really beat around the bush, do you?”

Shiro, the traitor, nods. He ignores Keith’s death glare and takes a sip of his tea, eyes crinkling with mirth over the rim of his mug. “Keith has always been very straightforward in what he wants. A real go-getter.”

It’s at that time that Coran makes an appearance, dressed in an obnoxiously orange pajama set with a matching hat, but any hope Keith has of the older man causing a distraction and, by default, a new topic change dissipates when he asks, “Oh, are we talking about Keith and Lance’s kiss? Congratulations Keith, I hear it had quite the impact.”

Pidge looks like she’s barely holding back a laugh. “Yeah, way to go in for the kill, Keith.”

“Can we stop talking about this?” He doesn’t wait for an answer. “Stop talking. Just stop talking. I don’t want to hear another word.”

Thankfully, they listen and grow quiet. It doesn’t stop the looks that are thrown his direction, especially with Allura nearly vibrating in her slippers in the effort to capture his gaze, but it’s easy to scowl and turn away. He snatches the drink Shiro holds, ignoring the other’s surprised whine, and takes a sip, ready to head to bed and purge this conversation from his mind, never to be brought up again—

“Did you use tongue?”

Keith chokes.

Hunk merely hums. “Yeah, didn’t look like it.”

Keith thought he knew what love was.

It had been an easy thing, once upon a time. It had been his dad’s hugs after a long day, the blade left to him from a mother he didn’t know, a pat on the back following a perfect maneuver from a brother he found. It was as simple as looking up at the sky and letting himself get lost, for space was everything he had ever wanted, vast and exciting and impossible. Constant and safe and easy, a look to the heavens that held every dream.

But this is new.

New in that he is utterly blindsighted and unprepared for when it happens. A change in heart, from wistful ache to hopeful relief, sudden in the wake of new love. Stitched together through time and soft words, it beats again. Thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump, it goes, drumming loudly against his chest, swelling at touches that burn like supernovas, thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump.

Even more goosebump-inducing than the fire in his chest is the response it gets. Because, startling enough, the feeling is reciprocated.

No words have been said but the thought is there. It comes through in the accidental brushes that turn to lingering caresses. It’s the stretch of an arm thrown over wide shoulders, heads dipped closer as casual words are exchanged. It’s the lack of space as they sit, thighs pressed firmly together and feet idly kicking. It’s the pluck of pink petals out of dark hair, absent-minded, curling in the breeze. It’s the hand pressed against a lower back, feather-light as it guides them closer and onward.

Everything is the same, but different.

Following the date, they are still Lance and Keith, still stubborn and opinionated and more than willing to call each other out, but now—now, they’re more. Keith can talk strategy for restoration while their hands are clasped under the table; can steal a kiss during a spar and, while the other is distracted, sweep his legs right out from underneath him and ensure his victory; can argue the integrity of putting pineapple on pizza for three hours while cuddled under Lance’s arm; and can even sneak the boy into his room when Shiro and his mom are out on call, leaving the door closed and the lights off. He’s allowed to do these things—encouraged, even, if Lance's pleased as punch looks are anything to go by—to look, to touch, to hold. It’s a recently discovered niche in which they fall into, each eager to explore, and once they find their line, Lance makes a point of tiptoeing it. And Keith—well, Keith can't find it in himself to complain.

(“Like this,” the Lance of his flashes murmurs to him one night as he gets ready for bed—only for the words to be spoken again three days later as they curl into each other on the beat-up couch in his shack. “I like it like this.”)

Life shapes into something remarkable in the days of after. It becomes a certainty that the flashes had promised and Keith sometimes can’t believe it, that he gets this. Gets this and more. Because not that long ago, he had nothing—he was nothing—scraping by, sneering at everything he couldn’t have just to hide how it hurt to be denied the love he so desperately craved. But that’s the past and though it shapes him, it is not him. He is here, today, and soon, tomorrow too.

Tomorrow and every day that comes after.

In a menagerie of light, meteor showers and space whales, Keith dreams.

Even so long apart, the abyss is a physical thing inside him. It curls inside in the space behind his heart while he sleeps, coveting each heartbeat like a dragon to a horde; time does not exist in this plane and each heart beat, a remembrance to what he has lived through and what he will live through, is too enticing to pass up. It croons out a soft lullaby, asking for one last look.

Keith gives it.

It’s the sand between his toes and lips meeting his own, sun-warm and pliant to the lazy breeze. It’s the hot puff of breath at his neck while frantic hands explore. It’s the ring on his finger and the sip of champagne, glasses clinking in a toast made. It’s the weight of a child on his chest, calm and innocent, snoring lightly as a small hand fists his shirt. It’s the dip of a mattress every night, for the rest of his nights.

Keith wakes up and knows that’s the last flash he’ll ever have.

On the first day of the rest of his life Lance challenges Keith to a race.

It’s not the first time one of them has issued such a dare and it surely won’t be a last, but Keith still treats it like it’s the most important thing he’s ever done. He squares his shoulder and steps up to the plate, toe to toe, staring Lance in the eye as he accepts. It’s like old times, even with the newness between them, rearing up in the deliberate way Lance tilts his head, chin jutting out in that stubborn fashion of his, the crook of his eyebrow and the curl of his lips dangerous in ways Keith is only just getting used to.

Nevertheless, the day finds them back at the loading docks, convincing the Atlas crew to let them borrow another speeder. When Keith has signed the proper paperwork he turns to find Lance already seated on one of the hoverbikes. The red one.

Keith squints and Lance grins, but lets it go with a soft huff. He walks over to the gray bike and hoists himself with little effort, straddling the sleek seat and making himself familiar with the controls.

“Ready?” he asks once he's done.

“Born ready,” is Lance’s answer.

And, well, Keith can't let a challenge like that stand.

Without further ado, he revs the engine and shoots down the catwalk. He hears the beginning of a surprised squawk before the wind is boxing his ears, tugging at his hair, chasing away everything until it is just him and the road.

Flying is in his blood. It’s been a part of him since as long as he can remember. It was there when he sat atop his father’s shoulders, arms spread wide and leaning back as far as he dared, staring up, up, up. Fondly, he recalls the way big hands had grasped his tiny ankles and the voice, deep and honest, quoting, Once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return.

He had been too young to understand the words then, but he thinks he understands them now.

Though the most air he gets this time around is a particularly steep ledge over a slim ravine a quarter of a mile east from Galaxy Garrison property, it still feels the same. Like he’s taking a deep breath for the first time, lungs expanding until he is weightless, free. Free to be who he is, even if that is a boy quick to anger and slow to love.

And Keith likes who he is now. Likes who he can be—with Krolia, with Shiro and the team, with Lance.

In the end, Keith wins the race.

It’s a close call and his heart races at the thought of it. Because Lance is grinning that absurd grin, eyes crinkling with the force of it, and his hair is a mess, windblown and highlighted gold by the sun. The white shirt that clings to him is twisted and Lance makes a halfhearted effort to fix it as he quiets his hoverbike’s engine and starts talking in compensation, mouth moving a mile a minute.

“I almost had you at that last bend,” he is saying, leaning back in his seat so that his torso is one sleek slant. “I shouldn't have hesitated on the acceleration—I guess I’m just not an adrenaline junkie like you, but hey, now that I know the angle, it’ll be different. So I say we go around again. Two out of three wins. Loser has to help Coran clean the—Keith? Hello? Are you even listening to me?”

It’s not a flash, but it feels like one.

“Keith?” Shoulders rise as Lance angles his head to catch his gaze, honest concern coloring those beautiful eyes. They aren’t that close, hovebikes parked perpendicular to one another, but he swears he can see the universe reflecting in dark navy. Planets colliding and forming, spinning in orbit around a dilated pupil. “Hey, man, what’s wr— ”

“Date me.”

The words are out of his mouth before he has time to really think about them and what they mean.

Lance splutters. “What?”

But now that the idea has been introduced. Keith can't deny its appeal; to keep what they have, in all its stubborn sincerity and wild attraction, going for as long as they live. Perhaps even further than that. “Date me,” he says again, with more conviction. A pause. “Please. Please date me.”

A moment, then—

“You just have to beat me at everything, don't you?” Lance starts, loud enough to be considered yelling, but having none of the thunderous anger usually associated with the volume. “Can't even give me this one thing, can you? Well, the joke’s on you—cause it was going to be great! I had everything planned out and it was going to be the most romantic thing ever! Would've blown this disaster out of the water, I'm telling you!” He stands and, uncaring of the wobble it gives under his weight, marches purposefully across the wing of his bike until they’re parallel to one another. One of his hands waves madly about, flying across the entire range of their surroundings before gesturing to Keith himself. “Candles and rose petals everywhere! Hunk was gonna cook something nice and we would've danced and—and you were gonna swoon! Straight into my arms! There would've been kissing and everything! The whole shebang!”

Keith furrows his eyebrows, lost. “What?”

But Lance blows past his confusion and slumps to the side in an expulsion of energy, mumbling, “God, you're such a jerk.”

Hands move to grip the front of his shirt, the only warning before the entire weight of his maybe-boyfriend is forced upon him. Keith feels the wisp of eyelashes fluttering against the column of his neck as Lance smooshes his nose into the junction there, mumbling words and noises he can't hope to translate. He returns the clumsy embrace automatically, winding his arms around the other’s waist and resting his cheek on a soft, brown crown of hair.

“So… yes?”

Lance laughs a watery laugh, deliriously happy, and leans back to stare him straight in the eye, a whirlwind of blue caught in a crystal ball of stars. The grip on his shirt loosens, fingers trailing up his chest until they tease the nape of his neck. “Of course it's a yes, you absolute loser.”

Keith frowns even as his heart sings, melody erupting into fireworks so loud he might go deaf. “See, it's stuff like that last part that really mix me up.”

“Oh my gosh, just shut up and kiss me.”

So he does.

Time, like most things in Keith’s life, is something he keeps close.

[seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana]

@catlovingwitch asked me why Diego was my favorite character and I decided to make a post about it :)). And @megatraven LOOK!! I was able to be like you and made a whole post about why I love Diego and this isn’t even all of it either. And if anyone wanna asks me why I love my favorites, then ask me again and I’ll say why! Even if it’s Diego bc I have more to say!!

WELL!! It’s hard to explain why. I haven’t played him in awhile bUTTT IDK WHY FNWBE. I just love him so much. It’s the way that even when he and MC are strangers, he cares for her. Ik he’s a doctor and he’s supposed to care but he wasn’t on duty and didn’t have to care. He doesn’t pry, even if MC does sometimes, AND he feels remorse PLUS he actually does enjoy being a doctor. Not just to do good but also because he enjoys helping people!

The way he puts his doctors coat on MC when she’s sleeping in the bowling alley. He didn’t have to do that, but he did. He put it in her so she would be comfortable while sleeping. He let her sleep in his bed and he may have been a little rude with his responses about “does this look like a bed and breakfast?” But he still offered her comfort and ordered her food and didn’t really judge her for it bc it was a pizza. He worried for her before they became a couple. He’s strong and doesn’t like to show it often because he doesn’t want to hurt people and that’s so sweet. He doesnt take blood from people themselves because he sees it as wrong. He takes her when she wanted to see Victor and when she broke down about Grace, he didn’t judge her. He just held her softly and said “it’s okay. You have to get it out.” And he just held her gently and let her cry because he knows she needs it and because he cares about her.

When he kissed her and noticed his fangs were coming out, he noticed it immediately and stopped because he can’t hurt her. He wouldn’t forgive himself. I bet it was tempting but he couldn’t do it. And when he found out that Victor found her, HE LOST IT ON HIM!! The kind and patient man lost his control on Victor because someone he began to love is in danger and he can’t let her get hurt because of him. I haven’t played him in awhile but I believe he kinda pushes her away at times, but it’s not because he’s angry but it’s because he doesn’t know what to do.

He’s new to this. He hasn’t loved someone romantically in a LONG time so it’s hard to know what to do. PLUS, he doesn’t want to turn her into a vampire because he’d worried about her and doesn’t want her to regret anything. He just wants her happy and tries to teach her about EVERYTHING. Whenever Dracula is coming for him and her, he protects her and is literally like “she is my lover and you WILL treat her with respect.” He was a little afraid of Dracula but he wasn’t afraid to say that he loves MC and will make her be respected.

And when Antonio is like “leave her” Diego is just saying “NO.” The game made it seem like he would, but he couldn’t. He loves her so much and asks her to go with him because he wants to protect her. He doesn’t do the thing where they break up and he disappeares. He took her with him and swore to protect her and it’s just so sweet to me. He loves her and can’t leave her alone. And when he sees Eva again, he notices MCs problem and he’s like “oh, sweetie,” and doesn’t call her ridiculous for her jealousy and worry but comforts her and is saying “I love you and no one can take that love away from me.” AND OH GOD,,

When she was thrown off the roof made me love him more. One of the wives had MC by her neck and Diego is PANICKING. He loves her. He can’t lose her. “Please let her go,” he says trying to make a deal, willing to lose himself, but she drops and he screams. He screams like he is dying because he most likely is. He tells her, “I don’t know what I would do in a life without you in it,” OR SOMETHING ALONG THOSE LINES. HE CANT LOSE HER BUT NEVER FORCES HIS DESIRES ON HER. And when they’re fighting the wife, you can tell Diego is going at it. She just DARED to hurt his lover and he’s not letting her get away with it. He only lets her go bc MC is sick and needs care. AND THATS WHEN HE TELLS HER HE CANT BE WITHOUT HER IN THE HOTEL. HE LOVES HER SO MUCH!!

And when she got stabbed by Dracula, Diego saw it and witness it happen. He saw the claws go through her back and heard as she screamed. She was dying but he ran with her. He ran for somewhere safe for her. Somewhere where he could hold her. And he realizes he has to turn her. He’s worried for her. His desires of wanting her to live by his side is still pushed aside because he can’t force this on her and is like “Don’t ruin your life for someone else’s happiness” telling her that she doesn’t have to do this!! He will be so sad, probably depressed for eternity, but he can’t force her to do anything because he loves her. And when he turns her he helps her with everything!! Teaches her, comforts her, tells her it’s okay, and even when he pushes her away you know he misses her.

He loves her so much and is so in love that he doesn’t think about himself sometimes. He thinks of her and tries to make sure he isn’t forcing her to do something. He just loves her,,,so much,,and he cares for her and when he’s controlled by Dracula, the most powerful vampire, MC snaps him out of it and he realizes and he loves her so much that he snapped out of it for a moment. His pupils become so wide because Diego is telling himself to STOP. He’s looking at the love of his life and he CANT DO THIS. HE CANT HURT HER. HE WONT HURT HER!!

And away from MC, he cares for everyone! Even JD!! They don’t always get along but he cares and makes sure JD is happy too. Like when JD is missing because of their father, Diego comforts MC and is saying that it’s okay and does his hardest to help everyone!

And my favorite moment of Diego out of his own route, is in Razis route when Baba Yaga (is that her name?? I forgot) has Razis bottle and MC is having nightmares from the laylines, and Diego watches over her. It’s his turn because everyone have shifts, yet he doesn’t stay in the hallway when she wakes up. He comes in, eyes filled with concern and scaring her for a moment, but he apologizes and calms her down and he sits in front of her and says he’ll stay until she goes to sleep. He tucks her back into bed (which is so wholesome of Diego...), and stays for a moment, and MC breaks down. She’s crying and is scared to show it because she doesn’t like to, but once again, Diego doesn’t judge her. He leans in and hugs her to his side. He wanted to make sure she knows she’s loved. That it’s okay to feel sad and show it and say how much he cares for Razi. And he’s like “I’m Razi’s friend and I’m yours as well, you know that, right?” Stating that he cares for her and MAKING SURE SHE KNOWS!! He just cares for her and Razi so much and will make sure she’s safe. And whenever she goes to bed and they wake up in the morning, Diego doesn’t say a word about her red eyes. He keeps it between him and her and I feel like he would comfort her more if she needed it,,,

Mackenzie and Razi are his best friends and he WILL make sure they’re okay. When Mackenzie is hurt in her route he rushes over and is like “don’t you die on me Mackenzie!” And when Razi is hurt in his route, he reacts immediately and helps him as best as he can. He goes to New York in an AFK special to help someone, in Dukes route it’s stated that he loves his wife (who is MC) and watches movies with her every Friday even if he finds them a little ridiculous!!

He wanted to give her The wedding SHE desired, he offered to help Antonio and he cared about him even when Antonio was being basically a little BIH. He cares for everyone and how can’t I love someone like that? And in JDs route when they’re in hell and he’s being controlled, he almost bites MC but gets it under control and he apologizes to her after it and feels truly guilty. He cares and he spreads that love to everyone he knows (and everyone he doesn’t) and how can’t I love him?

How can I not fall for this vampire who cares for his wife, his friends, Antonio who is almost like his brother because they want to kill each other, AND THE WORLD!! HE LOVES ALMOST EVERYONE!! Anyways, that’s a little as to why I love Diego and there’s so much more,,,I said what he did because it’s why I love him. His actions are why I love him and I hope I said it all correctly here in this Chili’s tonight. And Meg I wanted you to see this too bc I’m becoming like you but instead of Alex it’s Diego (I still love the posts of why you love Alex. They’re adorable and wholesome,,,).

If y’all want more reasons tell me bc I hAVE A TON!! AND FOR OTHER CHARACTERS!! IM UP FOR QUESTIONS FOR EVERYONE I LOVE!! ASK ME ANYONE THATS ON MY WHO I WRITE FOR!! I’m always up for talking about my babes😌.

Some proofreading but I may have gotten stuff wrong bc I got homework to do,,,

[kinetic-elaboration]

February 8: Mountain Lion Mean Notes

Okay, so I was writing up notes on my Troped Western fic and then I clicked something and it all disappeared! I’m very upset and I hate the idea of starting again but like... I guess that’s what I gotta do :/

Mountain Lion Mean on AO3.

Written for @troped-fanfic-challenge​

So as I said in my notes, I watched Hell or High Water on the Sunday the trope document opened and immediately became obsessed, and that was my main inspiration. I saw it and loved it and, like with most things I love, my first thought was how can I do this too?? I didn’t want to do a straight AU of it, because it’s just too good and I don’t want to mess with that kind of perfection, but I knew I wanted a similar mood. I also figured pretty early on that I would try to include a bank robbery.

For the first days after the trope doc opened, I mostly just gathered inspiration and tried to think Western thoughts. In addition to HOHW, my inspiration included:

The Western episode of Charmed

A Western Rock playlist I found on Spotify

This post of southwestern gothic aesthetics

“Ranch Girl” by Maile Meloy (also the inspiration for it is new moon and twilight, which, fun fact, was originally going to be a Western; I didn’t re-read the story but it’s been haunting me since I first read it c. 2001 and is probably a partial inspiration for everything I write)

William Faulkner (especially “A Rose for Emily” and A Light in August) for the “town POV” narration

Sigrid Undset for the floating third-person-POV

The wikipedia article on Westerns, for succinct summaries of the themes of Westerns

The original aesthetic, quoted from my notes: “The vastness of the west, the frontier, a little uncivilized, a little dangerous, tough looking men who don’t talk much, extrajudicial justice, the heat and the desert…“

By the time I sat down to brainstorm, I had a few ideas and a few images already in mind. I wanted to include a bank robbery. I liked the idea of Clarke as a gunslinger and/or purveyor of vigilante justice. I thought I might use Gina as a bartender (this was during the half-moment I thought I might write a Bartender Mechanic fic; obviously neither of these things happened). And I liked the idea of including Murphy as some kinda criminal or unsavory type. The image of Bellamy as a taciturn cowboy came fairly early too.

I was a little uncertain at first if I wanted to do an 1800s western or a neo-western, mostly because I felt like the tropes I was attracted to and the images in my head fit better in the 1800s. But ultimately I settled on neo-western pretty fast, because I thought the imagery and themes would work better in the modern day. Plus I just thought it would be easier tbqh.

My first concern was to not just re-write a shittier HOHW. I was really caught up in the logistics of the bank robbery; including too much of that would necessarily make it a copy of the film, so I tried to keep just the bare bones of the robbery + the general justification (saving the family land). Then I added additional portions of the scheme--not too difficult since I knew I wanted Gunslinger/Vigilante Clarke in there, and I needed some way to show that she takes Justice into her own hands--and additional characters. Again, most notably Clarke, but also Raven and Octavia. The characters have their own backgrounds, personalities, relationships, and motivations, all of which make the story more mine imo. I’m satisfied with the balance of Obvious HOHW Influences and original content.

At some point, I described it to my mom as “Bellamy is Toby, Murphy is Tanner, and Clarke is canon Clarke but in the modern West.” Which I still think is accurate.

Including Clarke, though, and privileging the various relationships among the trio of Bellamy, Clarke, and Murphy, made me feel like I was making an it is new moon and twilight knock off except with Clarke for Raven. I still kind of see it, tbh, in the sense that twilight was itself supposed to be a western--I think it would be fair to say that Mountain Lion Mean IS the fic I set out to write in February 2020--and in the sense that I could have written a different story in the same universe as Mountain Lion Mean that explored the Clarke, Murphy, and Bellamy relationships in a way that is similar to twilight. As is, a lot of that is unsaid and unseen. The two fics have different focuses, so it’s probably only apparent to me just how similar they are. Just like, to me, Mad Women and The Wanheda Tape are the same story even though they have very different aesthetics and plots.

Some excerpts from my notes that I think are fun:

I really want to work with the themes (haha themes) of frontier justice and also the sense that the west is infinite but also small, that nature is hard and impossible to wrangle but that the opportunities are narrow and it’s easy to get trapped in it, the melancholy nature of it, the dichotomy of nature (huge, powerful) versus man (small, struggling against nature and against man). Or some such. Or Murphy just robs banks.

Bellamy owns a struggling ranch. Clarke is a gunslinger (don’t really know if I can use this trope in the current day but possibly?) who doesn’t trust the law. Has a conceal[ed]-carry permit. Is the best shot in three counties. Murphy’s been in and out of prison most of his adult life, mostly for crimes like robbery and assault.

How do they know each other? Possibilities: Murphy knows Bellamy through Octavia (idk why…but I do feel like O should appear, riding a horse) (background Octaven? Just a thought), Bellarke are exes, Murphy used to work on the ranch. Clarke has killed someone (someone Bad) and gotten away with it.

I do like the focus being on these three characters, who have a long history but aren’t currently close, coming together for a mission (to rob a bank) for the benefit of one who is struggling (Bellamy) even thought this is an awful lot like both Hell or High Water and it is new moon and twilight lmao.

I like that mood from HOHW where actually Toby was the most dangerous, and the smartest, and he won—the idea that Bellamy is the taciturn cowboy who’s not good at sharing his feelings but he’s also the mastermind in the end. Is that the twist? You get the impression Vigilante Gunslinger Griffin and Actual Ex-Con Murphy are planning something, but then it turns out to be Bellamy who executes the plan? [Not quite how it turned out lol in that I think it’s decently obvious that Bellamy was a major part of it the whole time but I did try to get some of this in with Octavia in the final scene--to really drive home Bellamy’s importance, as the ring leader, since otherwise one could ask, what does he even do?]

Midway through the planning process I came up with some more images to work from:

B and C out at dusk on the ranch, she’s shooting can, a bit of UST perhaps

M shows up at the bar and there’s an awkward silent entrance—perhaps he’s just out of prison

Murphy or Clarke guns akimbo [I picked Clarke to emphasize that she’s the gunslinger, but I had Murphy shoot out the security cameras to show that they were using his robbery experience]

Bellamy being silent and awkward

At this point, it was just about putting all the pieces together. That’s how I tend to plan Troped fics: I lay out all the pieces I need or want to include and then I figure out the shortest and most efficient distances between them. For example, I knew I needed a bank robbery and for Clarke to administer some vigilante justice--so I use that justice as a way to launder the money. They fake a will for her victim and “give” the money to themselves.

I did worry, and still worry, about the timeline re: the Bellarke marriage and the will because I’m quite sure it doesn’t make sense and doesn’t work. But it also... it doesn’t keep me up at night because the whole point is that it’s a scam!! Worrying about legality in a scam is sorta... lol. What I mean specifically is that I wanted it to be clear that Clarke does not kill Kane FOR this scheme. They use something she already did to their advantage. So she and Bellamy can’t be married at the time Kane is killed. That implies the murder was pre-meditated for the bank robbing purpose. But I’m also fairly sure (and I should know this because I took T&E but like...honestly can’t remember) that the people in the will are counted at the time of death, not the time of probate, or you could like... adopt extra kids or marry or divorce someone to affect the will. Plus all that stuff about simultaneous death etc. etc. Also, on a practical level, if Clarke wasn’t married, Kane wouldn’t have an obvious reason to write her spouse into the will. But I get away with this in my head by saying, first, no one’s going to say the husband that’s standing right there doesn’t count as a husband--the law is the law but it’s implemented by people and they fudge corners all the time. They do what seems to make sense even if you’d lose points for it on a law school exam. And second, the will could have been written with the assumption or hope that Clare would marry. Possibly even, though I don’t say this in the fic exactly, on the condition of marriage--Clarke gets 100% to share 50-50 with her husband if she’s married, 0% if she’s not. Doesn’t really matter. It’s supposed to read as outwardly clever and create Mystery and play with the Exes Aesthetic even if it doesn’t hold up the strictest scrutiny. (JDs don’t @ me.)

I justified including the marriage as a necessity because Kane could possibly leave money to Clarke’s husband but he wouldn’t leave money to some rando. I do stand by that part.

I also decided at some point that I wanted to include Background Octaven but be really subtle about it so it was something else the reader would have to piece together: that Raven has a girlfriend, then that Octavia has a girlfriend but, hey, isn’t Raven a bartender?--and then it comes together in the last scene as we see that their relationship was factored into Bellamy’s plan all along: some of the loot goes directly to Octavia and her partner, officially as payment for Raven’s services, unofficially because Bellamy wants to give O a gift. Anyway. Either it was too obvious or too subtle/boring because no one mentioned it but I thought it was cool lol.

At this point in my planning I basically had everything I needed, so I wrote a quick outline of scenes, as I always do, to see how it would flow scene to scene and if I had a place to put all the necessary plot info. I also ended up doing “what I need from this scene” lists for each scene so that I knew what I had to have on my mind to include before I sat down to write each one.

The actual writing was done over 3 days and fairly easily and quickly. I had a lot of fun not just with planning but with the actual process of creation. I think it’s because I was just honestly excited to be in this universe and play with this aesthetic.

Not to blow my own horn here but some parts that I was particularly pleased with were:

“Arkadia hasn’t seen a drop of rain in thirty-two days. The asphalt on the highway shimmers with heat; the air crackles with heat; the heat rises, stifling and strong, from the parched dirt and the cracks in the pavement.” Like I’m sorry but that’s a good image, I like that a lot. Whenever I felt discouraged, I just read that again and felt better.

The description of past Bellarke because boy howdy do I not care to write romance anymore but that was fun. I thought it was hot.

Transitioning Murphy laughing until the coyotes can hear into Bellamy hearing coyotes at night into Bellamy still hearing them during the day. I don’t know if it worked quite like I wanted to but in my head that is a very Cinematic transition, okay? I also like that even though Clarke and Murphy aren’t literally riding off together in that scene, for the reader, they are leaving the narrative never to be seen again. So they get their Dramatic Exit.

Octavia’s explication of the Theme and Bellamy’s possible motivations. I’m pretty proud of myself for actually having a theme and I think I did a good job of explaining it without being too heavy-handed. I also think it was perhaps risky to end with the POV of Octavia, a character who’s barely been in the fic before the last scene, but ultimately that decision felt right to me and I think it had a good flow, a nice mellow exit from the narrative.

What I didn’t like as much was a lot of the first scene. I think it has some great bits but it was the most re-worked part of the fic, and there are still some paragraphs and phrases that I feel are a little stiff. For example, this is a paragraph that I cut entirely:

Diyoza was sure the Griffin daughter did the deed back in January and she's sure about it still. She even gives a quote to the Sun-Times about it, despite her troubles with Green. But she had no proof then, not even a body to justify a murder charge, and she has little proof now. So no one believes the investigation will come to anything.

As you can see, it gives no new information. There were other sentences and phrases that weren’t doing work but were interrupting the flow, which also got cut, but I’m still not sure that the flow is perfect in the final version.

Also displeased that I edited out a * from the version on AO3, thus letting two scenes run together. How embarrassing!!! It’s fixed now though.

Overall though I’m so pleased! I love this fic and I love that I can love things again. This year has already been so hard, just like being battered again and again by waves of a storm, and it’s only 5 weeks in but this experience was so unabashedly good and I’m so grateful for it.

[livelovelaug-h]

How you & Dr. Cox get together

Dr. Cox x reader small jd x reader

A/n: Sorry this is so long loll 😅 credit to @mona-stay for helping me with this and being my beta!!! 💕💕💕

It sucks when you like someone but it especially sucks when it's someone you're working with. it can be hard to get their attention especially in a hospital. 

Of course you first thought Perry Cox was arrogant and full of himself. But it was all an act and he started growing on you the more the days went on. You guys didn't talk much but just seeing him around was enough to make your heart Start pumping out of its chest. He was so hot. 

You heard a rumour that 

"Cox has feelings for Carla" and they seemed pretty close so you didn't interfere. You got confused when Carla started dating Turk Jd's best friend. You and Jd talked only a little here & there, but when he broke up with Elliot you guys starting talking more and helplessly flirted. So you guys agreed to be friends with benefits. 

Your feelings grew more for Perry when you saw his true colors on this one specific day:

Flashback

You were not having the best day. You lost two people. You lost a kid in the morning that was born premature and a girl who had terminal cancer. The rest of the day was going to torturous.

Crying in the medicine room for awhile, you heard someone come in. Perry Cox. You quickly wiped the tears away, picked up some random bottle to make it seem like that's why you were in there and started walking out. 

"Hey, I was looking for you." He says with something in his voice you couldn't quite place. 

"Look I don't need one of your world famous Dr. Cox lectures or rants right now. I know I could have done better I don't need you telling me too." You said. 

"I wasn't gonna say that actually. I was going to tell you that I think you did a good job."

"Really?" 

"Yeah ever since you started working here you haven't needed me half as much as the others. You're independent, smart, and there was nothing you could have done differently to save those lives." You were now on the verge of tears. "it would have happened no matter who was their doctor. Don't doubt yourself for a second." 

"Wow... thank you. That means a lot coming from you." You let a tear shed, turning to walk away you heard: "Hey.. uh my shifts up in a few minutes wanna grab a cup of coffee?" 

"Yeah sure, I'd love that."

~~~ 

You guys sat down after being in line getting your coffees.  "Hey how are you feeling?" 

"awful." 

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks. 

"Well... we knew it was terminal and the day would come, but it doesn't make it any easier. It's not fair, she was so Young." He must have seen you were about to cry again so he put his hand over yours. 

"It doesn't get easier but that just means you can't let it tear you down. It means you have feelings. I remember my first time losing someone, 20 years later I still react the same." 

"What do you do with the pain?" 

"I drink my pain away. Always will always have. Also every now and then I talk it out with someone. Maybe your boyfriend Abby can help you with that." 

"Jd? Oh no we're not dating. I told him it would be better if we were just friends." 

"Oh." 

"What about you? Who's your special someone." 

"No one at the moment." 

You guys lost track of the time and stayed in the cafe over an hour just talking. He truly did make you feel better. 

Jd came in the Lunchroom and started heading over to you guys: 

"oh hey you guys are still here. Are you ready to carpool?." 

"Yeah sure. By the way (you looked back at Cox) you were right it was nice talking with someone." You smiled at him. 

"Of course I'm always right." He said teasing, which you laughed too.

"I really appreciated this. See you tomorrow." 

"Yeah, see ya." 

End of flashback

~~

Since yesterday you couldn't stop thinking of him even more. You had to walk past him so you nodded saying "doctor Cox." 

"Doctor (y/l/n)." He was smiling too much, but you didn't get to see since you were walking away. When you left he did a little "ugh" but the good one. 

"Ooo looks like someone has a crush." Carla said. 

"Oh no I don't." 

"No? what do you call it when you smile like that?" 

"I am not smiling -  (he stops the smiling) no I'm not and I call it one of the only people in this hospital that doesn't drive me crazy? Ding ding ding ding ding we have a winner and it's not you anymore." 

"Oh please you know I'm right!" She says while he walks away. 

~~The next week~~

You had just finished up your shift and wanted to change from your scrubs. It had been a long day so you were ready for a drink. You had on a nice top that was a little revealing but hey Friday night was the night to let your hair down right?! 

You were walking towards the front of the hospital where you seen Todd, Cox and Carla. Of course Todd was drooling. "Boobies. Oh… I mean you look hot."  Todd blurted out before he could stop himself. 

"Todd give It a rest." Cox said hitting him on the head.

Todd shrugs looking towards Carla "but she does look hot" he said low so cox wouldn't hear. 

"You look nice." Perry says, taking a step closer. OMG HE THINKS I LOOK HOT. His tone sounded slightly sarcastic but the cheek wink and flirty smirk, definitely made it clear to you alone he really meant it. "going anywhere special?" he asked.

You could feel the blush on your cheeks burn, "erm only the local with these two" you pointed at Carla and Todd "the others are meeting us there, you should come"

"Ah no i don't want to Intrude." 

"Oh no you won't be. Plus I'll need someone cool to talk to." 

"I'll think about it." he winks.

"Hopefully I'll see you there."

~~

The whole time you kept checking the door to see who was coming in and every time you got disappointed. He never showed up. 

JD walked over to you and asked: "Hey why do you keep checking the door? who are you waiting for?"

You shrugged "no one." Carla gave you a sad smile.

You may have thought you had someones attention but maybe it wasn't enough to pull them in.

~~~

Fear is something we're constantly fighting. Weather its a new relationship or a new job it always seems to be there.

Carla walks in the hospital and sees Dr. Cox

"Why say your gonna be somewhere and not show up?''

"ahh don't let the bf hear you say that but I'm flattered you missed me."

Fear can make you do a lot of things like, not show up to something even though you really wanted to go.

"it's not me who missed you but if your gonna play y/n like you do all the interns I'm not gonna stand around and watch." 

"y/n only wanted me there because I was there for her when she lost those people."

Carla soften up "maybe but that girl had eyes for you since day one and if weren't so full of it you would have seen that."

Cox is quiet for a moment and rubs his head.

 "see you do like her too!" 

"I don't and even if I did it can't happen."

"why?"

"Well it's unethical we work together" 

"yeah right like that ever stopped you. Next excuse."

"so what? even if it's possible to date each other why would she want me, I'm sure she'll find herself some younger nicer boyfriend."

"Sure you are ignorant most of the time but we know that you are no Bob kelso. You are a good man and that's what she sees." 

"Ehh yeah i don't know." 

"I think you're just scared to commit." He stands quiet again. Carla was looking at something behind him. 

"...But if you don't believe me you can ask her yourself."  Perry turned and saw you standing there. 

Maybe after all you did have their attention..

"is that really how you feel?" You asked him.

"look I like you but I'm older and I have a lot of baggage."

"we all have our baggage. And as long as the age I don't care. We don't have to get serious or jump right in, we can go out and have fun and just see where the feelings lead us. "

"that sounds good. Wanna go grab a drink after work? I promise I'll show up this time."

"i would love that." You giggle.

In the end it just takes talking it out with a friend to get over- well anything. In some cases it might help you realize that you shouldn't let fear hold you back.  

[vmheadquarters]

TALK NERDY WITH US: Exclusive Interview with Veronica Mars’ Jason Dohring and Percy Daggs III at ATX TV Festival

BRYNA KRAMER

JUNE 13, 2019

When the new episodes of Veronica Mars drop on Hulu on July 26th, Marshmallows will see many familiar faces. Jason Dohring will be reprising his role as Logan Echols, the bad boy 09er turned military man and Veronica’s love interest. Percy Daggs III will also be returning as Wallace Fennel, Veronica’s best friend since their Neptune High days.

I got the chance to sit down with Jason and Percy this past weekend at ATX TV Festival. We talked about what their reaction was when they were initially approached about the revival, if they thought Logan and Wallace would be where they are today, what they’re currently nerding out about and so much more! Keep on reading to see what they had to say!

So it’s been five years since the movie came out. What was your initial reaction when Rob [Thomas, creator] approached you guys about doing the revival?

Percy: It was kind of [this] unbelievable amazement, I guess I would say. And then hope, you know hope that it would happen again as far as another series if that was possible. I got the email and I tried to put it in the back of my mind because it was so much time in between the confirmation of it happening or not. I was just like, “Okay, if it does [happen], it does. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. That’s cool that they still have love for us.”

Jason: I mean Rob was always cool to keep us in the loop and sort of tell us what would be coming down. So you know even six months or a year before that, I think it was coming together and it kind of fell apart at one time but I think that there was always a push for it. Rob tells the story of sort of doing the numbers for the Kickstarter on the back of a napkin at a bar and I think that he had a good gauge of what the fan response would be. It was just so unique. I have two identical sets of twins in my family, twin brothers and twin sisters. It’s so weird but also it’s just normal for me, so I see this as such a strange unicorn sort of situation as far as special things that are not even real. So yeah, it’s wonderful. And I really think Rob’s able to keep the quality up and that’s cool. With a renewal, you’re hoping that it creates the same punch and interest for the audience and I think he’s been able to maintain that.

Yeah. You were talking about the fact that it is such a unicorn show and that it is so special. What do you guys think it is about the show that keeps fans coming back and always asking for more?

Jason: I think it’s funny. I think it’s truly funny, the witty banter back and forth and the characters and it’s own world. But I think [it’s also] really real. We were all just coming out of high school and we all lived two miles from each other near the studio; we were just trying to make the best show we could and we were all putting all of our effort in to making it good. I think Rob picked such a great cast; it was just awesome. We were just pushing it. Like when I was the antagonist, I was trying to be, “I’m better at putting you down than you’re putting me down.” I think that between me and Veronica when were not friends, a long time ago…..

Percy: I think it’s relatable too. We took society’s temperature. It was really intelligently written and we talked about classism and things that mattered in the world that back then and now is [still] relevant and cultural.

What does this show mean to you guys personally, because it’s been such a part of your lives for so long now?

Percy: If I never did it again, it would hold a special place. It was my first series regular [job]. The film was the first time the whole family, all 50/60 of us, could show up at a movie theater and see my work. And now as a father and a husband, I get to do it again. So it holds a special place in my heart.

Jason: Yeah, I mean it’s so unique. And I think it meant a lot to so many people. People come up and say, “You know this got me through high school.” And I’m like, “What? For real?” And it’s cool because [Veronica is] an underdog, but not just the underdog who’s beaten down. She’s an underdog that fights for what’s truly right and I think that is something everybody can relate to. Despite all the trouble, she’s still perseveres and that’s awesome. She’s a fighter.

Percy: As an actor, to piggy back off what he said, it’s the most fulfilling thing to have that, to not have somebody say, “Oh that’s a good show. That was entertaining. That was funny.” To say that it meant a lot to them, it’s a personal experience that holds true value.

Was it easy for you guys to step back into these characters because you played them on and off for so many years now? Or was it something that took a little bit to figure out again?

Percy: I don’t know about JD because his character has experienced some positive changes and some different dynamics, but for me, it was easy because I watched and experienced this kid grow up. So once I knew what to expect on the page, it was a piece of cake. And now, he’s even more relatable than he was in high school because of the current state of his life as an adult. So it was easy.

Jason: Yeah. There was a moment when I understood Logan back like 15 years ago when I just got him and he clicked for me. And so just to go back into that, Philip Seymour Hoffman says, “When you take a character, the light behind your eyes changes and you can just click into that guy” and I think you just do that again and then you have to add whatever history came between the end of that show and wherever you are now. So [the] military, all that stuff is added plus more of a calmer relationship perhaps with Veronica than there has been.

And you kind of alluded to it too, Percy, but how has your age and your own experience in real life impacted and informed how you approached these familiar roles?

Percy: Sometimes I feel like Rob catches up with me about how things are going and then tries to write pieces of my life into the script. Cause yeah, being a father and being a husband are the most important things in my life and being able to play that with Wallace now, it’s my comfort zone; it’s what I know. So yeah, it’s a lot more relatable. I had a different high school experience than Wallace. So this experience that Wallace Fennel is having right now, I know it pretty well.

Jason: Well Logan’s getting old, I’m getting old so it really impacts me [laughs]. I have four children in my real life and being in the military, I was sort of imagining that he’s around other people that have families and stuff like that and is kind of maybe wondering, “Is this a step I would want or whatever” and would you not want somebody to grow up with a mother such as Veronica. You know what I mean? That would be so awesome and [with] all her great qualities. So just thinking about it personally and how that might translate.

Is where we find your characters when this revival starts where you guys thought they would be? Or was did you imagine something different and [when you read the script, you were like], “Oh I wasn’t expecting Wallace to be here” or “Oh, I wasn’t expecting Logan to be here”?

Percy: Based on when the story took place in the first three seasons, I think I could have expected Wallace to be that. Him being a teacher at Neptune makes sense because Wallace put education before basketball a lot of times; it was his true passion. So that combined with the fact that Wallace is an optimist with a generous heart who wants to help people, him being a teacher made a lot of sense. It makes me smile to think that one by one Wallace is making a difference in the high school experience at Neptune. And then him being a family man, I mean it just seems like who he was. As Percy, there were times when I was like, “You know I love basketball too. I love education too.” But I wanted to just see him succeed. But to see him succeed in this way felt right.

Jason: Yeah, I’m kind of in the same place I was in the movie. I’m still in the service and I’ve been gone for a while, so it’s cool to come back because you know there’s like a little reunion that happens that is fun to play with Kristen [Bell, who plays Veronica]. I think there are other guys on the show, like Ryan Hansen[‘s character Dick Casablancas] is exactly where you think he would be. Have you seen it?

No, but just the way Rob [Thomas] was describing it on the panel today, The King of Neptune’s Spring Break…

Jason: Oh yeah. I mean it’s perfect. You’re going to see stuff with his character that’s outrageous but yet completely acceptable.

Percy: You know how they write in your yearbook never change?

I feel like it’s gonna be one of those things where instead of writing in your yearbook, “have a great summer,” they would have written [in his], “Have a great spring break forever and ever…”

Percy: [laughs] That’s right.

For you, Jason, Rob wrote these books that kind of take place right after the movie and Logan’s military background is a big part of those books. Have you ever read them or has he informed you of what happened with Logan in those books?

Jason: Yeah. I’m somewhat familiar with that story. I did a lot of research into the military myself as well with helicopter pilots at bases around Los Angeles. For the iZombie role, which I [later] found out was sort of a comedy show, I went to train with a sniper in Virginia for three days. He was one of the founders of Blackwater, which is a private military training company. So I went and did that and we’re shooting flamethrowers. Then I found out it was a comedy and I was like, “Well this is a little overkill.” [laughs]

How would you guys describe this new season in three words?

Jason: Same. You know it’s the same as the old Veronica. Dark and unexpected. The subject content is dark and then there’s some awesome twists. Really, really good.

Percy: Dope, fire, lit. [laughs]

Jason: I was going to say that.

We’re really going with this fire theme, guys. It’s really working.

Percy: [laughs] Three words besides those… I don’t know. I think he nailed it.

So we’re here at ATX Television Festival, celebrating the world of television. What are some of your all time favorite television shows and what are you guys currently watching?

Percy: I say this a lot but it’s just truth and facts. I don’t get a chance to watch a whole lot of TV because I homeschool. If I get a chance, I might watch a game show or two in the morning. Then, from there, if get [to watch] something in the afternoon, I might watch PTI or some sports-related show. Then at night, I’m watching American Ninja Warrior and World of Dance with the family and stuff like that. The shows that I’m interested in I don’t get to binge. I’m probably the worst TV watching actor in the world. Shows in the past… Martin and In Living Color are two of my favorite shows [when I was] coming up. I love comedy shows. I love to laugh.

What about you, Jason?

Jason: In prep for this, Rob said that this show will kind of straddle between the first two seasons of Fargo and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. I watched Fargo and I was like, “Damn, this is dark.” I watched those first two seasons and I thought it was fantastic. Great quality, fantastic story. And I think you’re gonna see a cool story in this [revival], too.

I just now thought of this but have you guys gone back and watch any old Veronica Mars episodes recently?

Percy: I haven’t had a full on binge, but the fans have requested re-watches so I’ve re-watched episodes that they were interested in here and there. Sometimes we catch the movie and my son is like “Daddy” and so we may end up watching the movie. But as far as going through all the episodes, it’s been a little while. I think when we were getting ready to shoot, I did some re-watches, just to get in touch with my character and everyone again.

Jason: Yeah, I did that too. Like for the movie, I think I watched all 60 episodes again just to get an idea.

Last question — our website is called Talk Nerdy With Us because we all have some kind of inner-nerd. So what is something you guys are currently nerding out about?

Jason: Apple trees. I’m a freakin’ gardener man, how nerdy does that get?

Percy: He’s got a green thumb. [To Jason] I need to come up and get bags of good stuff.

Jason: Dude, I’m the nerdiest guy around. Come see it. I’m like all about my soil. I’m like, “Wow, look at this” and I’m showing it to my son. I’m serious, man. It makes a huge difference.

Percy: It makes a huge difference.

Jason: Dude, it’s incredible. You’re going to try some of this, you’ll die. It’s great.

Percy: Well, it tastes different. So I guess I’m nerding out about organic eating. That’s what I’m nerding out about right now.

Jason: Dude, I have five beehives.

Percy: What? I’ve got to bring my son up because he’s super interested in that.

Jason: I have five beehives. I did four bee rescues. I rescued a bee hive from Lea Thompson from Back to the Future.

Percy: Are you serious?

Jason: Yeah, they’re Back to the Future bees. How nerdy does that get?

Percy: I can’t top that.

[xbreathehopex]

10 Ways to Save Your Marriage From Divorce

When you think you may be on the brink of divorce, you may still have a glimmer of hope that you can save your marriage. You want to stay together. And by putting in the effort, you can do it. Find out more help by Amy Waterman

As soon as you feel that first flicker of unhappiness, start proactively changing your tune (well, as soon as you finish this article). “The sooner people start working on their marriage when they’re unhappy, the easier it can be [to get past your problems],” says therapist Maru Torres-Gregory, JD, PhD, LMFT, a teaching and supervising faculty member for the Marriage & Family Therapy Program at the Family Institute at Northwestern University.

Okay, but let's be real: You’ve been stewing in these feelings for quite some time. And you're not alone. “People don’t know how to stay in love. Life tends to get in the way, especially when you have children. The relationship stops being a priority,” says Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, a couples therapist in New York City and author of Makeup, Don’t Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples. "But most marriages can be saved."

Every couple’s situation and circumstances are different. So, too, are the reasons they drifted apart, ranging from a lack of communication to cheating. Still, there are certain exercises you can do as a couple and individual, plus small steps you can take with your partner now to increase love, trust, and intimacy in the hopes of keeping you together. Here are 10 places to start:

1. Map it out.

Individually and as a couple, Torres-Gregory suggests writing down the following: how you started as a couple, what attracted you to your partner, where you are now, how you got here, and where you want to go.

“You won’t be able to have the marriage you had in the beginning, but you can work on having a new marriage. Think of it as marriage 2.0,” she says. To do that, though, you first have to know what that would look like.

2. Turn inward.

Thanks, romantic comedies, for giving us idyllic expectations for love. “You need to be fulfilled individually, rather than expecting your partner to fulfill everything,” says Torres-Gregory. Your partner does not have to “complete” you—and shouldn’t. (Hopefully, you've learned this before you said your vows, but alas...)

“You should be complete so that you don’t burden your partner or the relationship with the responsibility of making you happy,” she says. Take a deep dive into yourself: Why do you rely on your partner for this? Was it because that’s what was modeled in your parent’s relationship? Are you buying what popular media tells you?

By asking yourself these questions, you might be able to suss out what work you need to do to be a happier version of yourself, not just a happier wife. (The one begets the other, btw.)

3. Stop assuming.

Your partner asks a question: “Are the bowls clean?” and you lay into them—why are they always saying that you don’t do your part to care for the house? Can’t they see you’re swamped with life and work, too? “When couples have been together for a long time, they think they know each other. They begin to assume the other’s thinking and motivations and get angry and reactive to these assumptions,” says Torres-Gregory.

Here's the thing: The anger may be entirely coming from an argument that you’re having in your head—not the reality of the situation. Commit to stopping these assumptions, and if you think there’s a certain motivation behind a question or comment, at least ask. That'll help you get on a path to better communication, which can help turn an unhappy marriage around.

4. Set rules for the relationship.

Mutual respect and trust are necessary for a happy marriage, and if those two things have been lost, you’ll need to find them again. “Couples get into ways of interacting with each other and they don’t question it. They keep doing it,” says Torres-Gregory.

To minimize snapping and destructive comments, draw up some rules of the relationship when it comes to communication. “When you love and respect your partner, there are things you shouldn’t do or say,” she says. For instance, when you fight in the future, promise not to swear at each other or resort to name-calling. Again, the more constructive communication you can have, the better your chances of working through underlying issues.

5. Make a weekly date.

You two need to play together—ya know, like the old days. Go out once or twice a week for a date where you don’t discuss problems (or kids, if you have them). “Go back to the basics. What did you do before you were married that you’re not doing now? What did you do when you first fell in love?” says Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, a couples therapist in New York City and author of Make Up, Don’t Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples.

If the answer is playing mini-golf, bowl, or meet at a trendy bar for trendy drinks, well then, you’ve got your next date planned already.

6. Touch often.

I'm not even talking about sex here. “Hold hands when you’re walking down the street. Give each other a 20-second hug. Kiss each other hello. Dance cheek-to-cheek. Look into each other’s eyes for 30 seconds before you go to bed,” suggests Eaker Weil.

These simple exercises help deliver a rush of pleasure and bonding hormones (like oxytocin) to bring back the intimacy that you may be lacking now, she explains.

7. Show appreciation.

“I want you to have an affair with your partner,” says Eaker Weil. Say what now? Yep, Eaker Weil says that one of the best ways to save your marriage is to treat them like you can't get enough of them. (Even if, tbh, right now you can.)

That starts with expressing gratitude and appreciation of the other person: Gush over their new haircut, text them that you can’t wait to see them later—all the things that people tend to say to each other when they’re in the throes of romance. Sometimes you have to fake it till you make it, but starting a flame does build a fire.

8. Fight fair.

Real talk: You’re not going to just wave your hand like a wand to make sometimes years-deep pent-up resentment disappear. But that's okay.

In this exercise from Eaker Weil, your task is to make an "appointment" with your partner that’s limited in duration. (Tuesday from 7:30 to 8, for instance.) During this time, you fight fairly. You’ll start by telling them why you’re angry or what grudge you’re holding onto. Finish by asking them for a change. For example: “I feel like you never make time for me. All of your free time is dedicated to playing golf/going out with the guys/holing up in your home office. I want you to make time for me every week, even if it’s for 10 minutes.”

Your partner then follows up with something they’re resentful about; you just have to promise you’re not going to get angry, hurt, or reactive as they express themselves to you. To help make that happen, she recommends imagining that you’re holding their anger in a container as they speak (so that it's something you observe, not attack).

9. Envision the future.

Some of the main ingredients in a loving and healthy marriage are shared values, dreams, and life goals, says Torres-Gregory. Sit down and talk about your vision of a future together and how you’ll support each other, she says—it's an important and ongoing topic long after you've walked down the aisle or even had children.

If that seems impossible to see now and you can’t or don’t want to have that conversation, consider couples counseling. “A professional can help you start building that trust and goodwill again so that these conversations can happen more organically at home,” she says.

10. Try a Hail Mary.

Let's say you want to save your marriage, but your partner doesn’t. (Sorry.) Eaker Weil suggests taking a planned, structured break. “This isn’t coming from a place of being nasty. It’s saying, ‘I want to save our marriage, but I see you don’t feel the same way. Let’s take some time apart,'” she says. This could be for just one night, but four to six weeks is the usual amount of time that gives the partner “a kick in the ass,” says Eaker Weil.

“It’s not a punishment. It’s a wake-up.” No calling, no texting, and no sex for the entire time—the point is to make your partner miss you.

And if they don't? Well, counseling is always a good idea—as is re-evaluating whether your life partner is living up to their vows. The hard truth is that some marriages aren't meant to be saved–but that's up to you to decide when you're ready.

[sol1056]

let’s just leave this here

so let’s see how quickly I can get through a bunch of these, just so they don’t languish for the next month... here we go. behind the cut:  why the opening never changed, why DW is deploying Josh again, a few about Iverson & Hedrick, is a reboot possible, staying in fandom vs leaving... and some others in the same vein. 

why did they keep the same opening for all of vld seasons, considering the line-up was never supposed to come back to the original from s3?

Every indication is that originally, the team would return to the original lineup. Keeping the opening was probably meant to remind audiences of that inevitability. Or you could believe LM, who said the opening cost 20K to make, and thus was too expensive to do more than once. She’d rather spend that money on a vacation. 

So I've heard that Josh Keaton is doing damage control for S8. Do you think Dreamworks sent him in because they know that he's the one guy that no one can get mad at? After what some of the fans have done to him this past year [...] I’m amazed that he's willing to stick around and try to make his fans happy for as long as he can. I can see why people say "We don't deserve him."

Josh has somehow managed that sweet spot between charming the fandom and gaining its trust. Doesn’t hurt that he’s got the chops, voice-wise, to take written dross (no, really, some of those lines are horribly clunky) and spin it into gold. More than anything else, he comes across as genuine, and that adds a certain credibility to his words. 

But... Josh doesn’t really have a choice. Playing Shiro is what catapulted Josh upwards, and the last thing he can afford to do is piss off DW by refusing to play ball. He’d only be damaging himself (and his reputation among potential employers) if he didn’t snap to attention when called. Plus, I think he really does sincerely love the character, but it’s got to be a tough spot for him right now. 

When you get down to it, the only one on VLD’s (former) staff who seems to believe Shiro belongs in the story and should be respected as part of the story... is Josh. Who else can Shiro’s fans look to, if Josh stops speaking?

So, yeah, Josh is it. And I bet he knows that, and knows it’s just part of signing up for such a major role. This is part of his job. 

So I came across a pic of Mitch Iverson from SDCC 2018 where he and Tim Hedrick weren't in the panel ... and [Iverson] was wearing a SHIRO BLACK PALADIN top ... while the EPs & Hamilton were in the panel promoting S7, Iverson supported Hedrick & his story, and Shiro.

Hedrick was actively involved in every script as the story editor, and reportedly conceived of Shiro as an astronaut returning after his capture by aliens. Iverson got his start thanks to Hedrick, thus it makes sense that Iverson would be simpatico with Hedrick’s vision of the story. 

On top of that, by SDCC Iverson already had his next gig lined up. He continued to write for VLD, so he had to be subtle... but a t-shirt was a good way to make his sentiments clear. Can’t blame the guy, seeing he probably knew what was coming and chose a quiet protest of his own.

As an American, how would you take it if someone, that is, Iverson, called himself a redneck? From what I know thats derogatory term & for people not exactly inclusive & supportive of minorities. He also retweeted an art of Allura with a quote: ‘Laters’, which I found in really poor taste...

Redneck is another slur adopted by the in-group. My guess is that if you called Iverson a redneck to his face, he’d be offended. But if you introduced yourself as a redneck, and then called him one, it’d be different. And yes, as a term, redneck has a complex history, and it changes subtly in terms of how each generation defines/uses it. 

As for retweeting things in poor taste... eh, most people don’t have any training in social media. Jokes are the hardest; it’s so easy for them to go so wrong. Until VLD, I’d bet Iverson was lucky to have a few hundred followers. How many follow him now? It takes time to find your footing in striking the right balance of humor and dignity. 

Sometimes the best course is to ignore the stumble. They’ll either learn, or they won’t. Either way, it’s their problem, not ours. 

Will Tim Hedrick be allowed to continue the voltron universe the way he planned it?  

I doubt it. He’s got a new project. If you’re now an EP finally getting your name at the top, would you really want to go back and fix someone else’s story? Sometimes it’s just better to leave it behind, and make sure the next thing you do is something you can have pride in.

...why do you keep saying the last episode Tim Hedrick wrote was The Feud? A lot of people keep repeating it, like it was his last 'fuck you' to the showrunners. But official sources all say 'The Journey Within' was his last episode.

All we can say for certain was that tJW is the last Hedrick episode broadcast. That doesn’t mean it was the last one written. 

Here’s why a lot of us peg tF as Hedrick’s last written episode: the story editor credit. Hedrick's the sole story editor on all his other episodes; tF is the only one in which both Hedrick and Hamilton share credit. The simplest explanation is this episode was edited in that window during which Hedrick had one foot out the door, and Hamilton had one foot in. iow, Hedrick put it into the queue, edited half, and moved on. Ergo, last written.

I can’t believe how they just managed to anger literally everyone no matter your favorite character or ship.

I recall a quote from early on, where LM said they had a feeling they couldn’t please everyone. The problem (which I noted at the time, and has remained true) is that the answer isn’t to just piss off everyone. 

It’s to figure out who you want your audience to be, and to write the best damn story you can for that particular audience. If you end up with a story only old-timer DotU fans love, and kids are lukewarm about, fine. If the reverse is true, fine. You can’t please everyone, especially in a reboot/remake. So you pick your battles, and write your story accordingly. 

Looking around social media, most people I'm seeing are either rightfully upset, or they're hyperfocusing on the one single scene they liked because they just don't have the energy to deal with the show's bullshit right now. How can they fuck up the last season so badly that it seems like the general reaction is disappointment and denial?

I think there’s a common cause for the fandom reactions: exhaustion. 

In American broadcast television, a 26-episode season runs from September to May, then a summertime lull, during which people digest and discuss. Binge-watching is changing this, but it seems one thing hasn’t changed: no matter how fast we watch a show, we still require processing time. 

What did we get? A half-season, two months’ break, another half-season, two months’ break, a full season, three months’ break, and a final full season. If every season had provoked a spike equal to S1/S2, we might’ve been begging DW by June to just freaking chill. Fandom had barely begun to process one season and a new one was already landing on our heads. 

On top of that, S3-S6 weren’t exactly walks in the part, post-release. In terms of controversy, S7 dwarfed them all. That made an awful lot of people (across the entire spectrum, from almost every sub-group in the fandom) disengage. Those who remained dialed back on their expectations (”as long as X happens, that’s all that matters”), or they hung in there, insistent it would turn out alright. 

So either you’re exhausted from not being able to fully disengage with the final season still in the wings, you’re exhausted from convincing yourself this one specific thing would be enough, or you’re exhausted from defending what turned out to be indefensible. 

Frankly, disappointment and denial is a fairly soft landing, compared to what might’ve been. But any way you cut it, the fandom’s worn the hell out.   

Do you think LM and JDS are gonna address this or are they just going to ignore the complaints, wash their hands and move on?

They don’t need to do anything. They don’t work for DW anymore. If someone has to address the complaints, it’d be DW or DW’s chosen spokesperson. I guess you could call that washing their hands, but the simple fact is they’re not on the payroll. They’re not responsible for VLD anymore.

do you think it's possible for dreamworks to rewrite season 8? i've never heard of a show doing that before and i'm afraid that we'll be stuck with what we got, but damn, i really hope that we will get to see the characters get the endings they deserve, if nothing else.

I’m not sure why anyone would bother. S7 was rife with problems; S3-S6 meandered back and forth. If I were to do a soft in-series reboot, I’d go back to the end of S2. That’s the clearest break, story-wise. 

But if you’re going backwards 50+ episodes to the 26th, just keep going and start over. More to the point: not a lot of creators would sign on to inherit problems not of their own making. Same reason new directors on a property will want to rework the script in some way (if not start over from scratch). 

Do you think this is truly the end of Voltron: Legendary Defender? I know that a lot of the cast and crew wanted to continue on with a sequel, and there's so many possibilities and things they can do in that universe, not to mention that Voltron is (or rather, was) a money bank...

Your guess is as good as mine, really. Hopefully we’ll get at least hints when the SACanime panel rolls around in early January.

There's a change petition for the "original s8" to be released ... [people] believe that LM and JDS are NOT the ones who ruined the last two seasons and that it was "exec meddling." Like, no, sorry, exec meddling appears to be what made it good in the beginning.

If we consider Yoo an exec by virtue of being CEO of Studio Mir, then I kinda wish he’d meddled a bit more. 

...I'm wondering if the original version exists, completed. In one post, you said DW picked Tim over L/J so surely that got animated? What do you think? Be real. I don't want to get my hopes high thinking there's some buried treasure out there to find.

Ah, no, sorry, I wasn’t speaking in the sense of VLD but in the overall corporate sense. Here’s how the scenario often plays out: manager A and employee B do not get along. The longer they clash, the greater the chance A will find an excuse to fire B. The project is literally not big enough for the both of them. 

B could resign, quit, or do a preemptive strike: go over A’s head and ask for help. If B leaves the company shortly after, it means the higher-up said: “I’ve heard A’s side, and I think A is right.” The exec might offer a good reference, or blame it on a no-fault bad fit. Doesn’t matter; the exec’s chosen A’s side. 

Now, consider what actually happened: B gets transferred off the project, and gets a major promotion -- basically up to the same level as B’s former manager. Either B has some of the most amazing dirt ever, is phenomenally good at twisting reality to seem like the wronged party... or the higher-up reviewed the situation and decided that of the two, B was the one worth keeping. 

Having decided that, the exec made an offer B couldn’t refuse, which would be to run a show that’s practically tailor-made to fit B’s dream job. That’s what I meant by losing the battle (how VLD would go) and winning the war (being the party seen as in the right, by the execs). 

The only way for A to turn things around is to have a blisteringly successful final product. It could literally kill two careers with one stone: the (former) employee, B, who spun such a good story, and the exec(s) who believed B. 

Given the numbers I’m seeing for S8... that exec did choose wisely.  

ETA (sorry forgot this part): There might be pieces, but it really depends on what version control is in use (if any). For that matter, even if there were saved copies, who’s to say those didn’t get, whoops, deleted at some point? I’d put my bet on there being nothing, now, except what we got. Sorry. 

I could understand if you never want to have anything to do with this show ever again.

Oh, jeez, I was here before VLD and I’ll be here after. Once we all get over our mutual exhaustion (and the holidays, bloody great timing, there), it’ll be time to roll up our sleeves and get to work. Fandom’s got a lot to do, putting things back together in all the shapes that’ll make us happy. This is the best time to be in a fandom, if you ask me. Everything’s just getting started!

[paintingraves]

Crimes of Grindelwald info dump

CAREFUL : SPOILERS ! There’s no structure to this I’m sorry 

the humor is still very present. from newt’s awkward flirting skills to Jacob’s tell-tale high-pitched screams, it’s all here and guaranteed to bring a smile to your face.

seeing Hogwarts again was a great plus as well. Dumbledore as a teacher is a great thing.

Speaking of which Jude Law makes a perfect young Dumbledore. His performance is great, and I wish he’d had more screentime. I’m looking forward to seeing his role grow in further movies.

Credence is GROWING and that’s GREAT even if he MAKES MISTAKES

the baby nifflers - and as a matter of fact, all creatures - are delightful. the CGI is very well-done, and the creativity behind each of them is palatable. I love those guys so much.

Newt and Tina are actually adorable as fuck

Dan Fogler is great. Scratch that, he steals the show. He’s brilliant.

The cinematography, costumes, etc - all that is great as well. it’s believable.

in terms of acting… none of the actors get much screentime. Queenie & Jacob do get some emotional scenes. Credence is very busy making angry murder faces at the camera. I liked Tina as well, but again - not enough screentime.

there’s a lot of new characters being introduced, some who get no more than perhaps ten minutes of screentime as a whole (looking at you Nagini.) We get this whole building plot about Credence being Leta’s long-lost brother, thought dead, only to have it crumble in the last minutes - the same as it was with Credence’s sister Modesty in the first movie who we thought was the Obscurus. Now that worked actually well in FB1 but here it feels… kind of anticlimactic? Leaving you to wonder the whys and the hows because nothing led up to it.

I’d like to know how Credence came to know Nagini and how he found himself working in a circus, as well as how he survived. How?!

Nagini and Credence seem to be close friends, nothing more. Which is good - he could use some good friends, especially given the direction he’s taking. Just wish Nagini had more screentime to really show up the mechanics of their relationship and how close they are, because it really isn’t clear. We’re just supposed to take at face value that they know each other and that’s it.

How did Credence even find his adoption papers? Isn’t he being wanted by every government in the world? How does his status work?

They’re literally sending assassins after him because he’s supposedly Grindelwald’s greatest weapon, which like… chill a bit guys maybe. Rethink this through???

Oh, Grindelwald. Grindelwald is grooming Credence like hell, calling him “my boy” again and again and hugging him and touching him and making promises and Credence is falling for it hook, line and sinker. Someone help him holy shit.

One of the characters that actually does make sense is actually Abernathy. His role is minimal but he does help Grindelwald escape and seems to be given tasks of importance - which seems to be a great deal for a man who, like him, appeared to be no one before. It’s easy to see how he could have been seduced to Grindelwald’s side.

We don’t know much about Rosier yet. She’s just here. Looking pretty and threatening and hinting at her ‘close relationship’ with Grindelwald, whatever that means (I don’t want to think about it.) She seems to be his second-in-command.

I liked the fact that at the end Grindelwald and Queenie are like bros. Bitch bros. That’s wonderful and terrifying.

I didn’t say it enough, but the grooming

There were so many times. So many times where they could have mentioned Percival Graves and what happened to him in passing but not only once. NoT OnLy oNcE

but that’s a whole other headache SO. moving on

Hmmm Leta. What to say about Leta? She’s great. She seems like a good person, and Zoé did a great job portraying her. She’s the one who gets the most emotional scenes, next to Jacob and Queenie. There’s a whole family drama unfolding here (which oooh boi is it complicated) and it’s kind of easy to see how she became the woman she is?

She and Theseus seem to love each other very much. I’m wishing they had had more screentime, the two of them.

Nicolas Flamel is here for comic value.

I loved the relationship between Theseus and Newt. There’s some real brotherly love and character growth in there, and it felt good to see it depicted well.

I’m wondering how powerful that assassin sent by the british minister needed to be to resist the full-blown assault of a grown obscurus. even Grindelwald had trouble doing that. where’s the logic ???

also how did they obliviate the entire city of Paris following that little trick with the dark cloaks inviting people to Grindelwald’s little rendez-vous? Unless it was visible only to wizards, but since they show us an old intrigued man looking out the window I don’t think it was the case. So?

Same thing with the blue fires and red fires in the cemetery - how’re they gonna explain that to the muggle police and fire brigade should they come running?

Bunty is here for comic value.

Newt literally isn’t aware of his own appeal. I’m afraid oblivious!Newt from the fics is sorta canon now.

TINA DOESN’T GET ENOUGH SCREENTIME. She’s one of the characters who, along with Jacob, seems to have her shit together and seems eager to get shit done but we don’t see her progress. The movie prefers to focus on her relationship with Newt - which, don’t get me wrong, they’re adorable as fuck - instead of the much more interesting investigation plot line she has got going on. She’s an Auror; let her be an Auror ! Show us that side of her !

Queenie was certainly… something in this movie. I get the feeling she’s suffering a lot and Grindelwald is the only one, unfortunately, who listens.

Jacob the poor guy goes through a lot in this one too. I don’t know how he’s expected to survive in a world he really shouldn’t be in, and I think he’s starting to realize that. At the end of the movie he looks to be on the verge of a breakdown.

Leta dies sacrificing herself so the others can escape. Which is very noble but… I don’t know how I feel about that one just yet.

Grindelwald and Dumbledore… Hmm. Dumbledore shows us his suffering intimately. It’s a short but intense scene that goes one with him in front of that mirror and it’s a great piece of acting. Seeing Johnny Depp in front of him stiiiiill doesn’t cut it but oH WELL

Seeing Jamie morph into JD was about as bad as seeing Colin Farrell morph into him tbh. It’s unbelievable.

Now Grindelwald… Grindelwald is… He is Grindelwald. He is busy being Grindelwald. He’s not particularly striking but he gets the job done. That’s it.

Sometimes he looks terrifying and sometimes he looks ridiculous. The character design is still a hard pill to swallow.

I got the feeling at some points that Grindelwald worked well when he was doing some Johnny Depp. Like when he asks Queenie if Credence trusts him or when he says “I hate Paris” after killing a dozen people at the end of his rally - that was funny. Unexpected. And it worked well.

For someone who claims they are the non-violent ones he does seems very prone to like, drowning people, killing children and burning people with fire lol - but all that away from the public eye, which is clever. I’d say in Grindelwald’s and his followers’ opinion that rally worked very well. It did what it was meant to - give them an insight into his hopes and beliefs and then scare them into joining his side.

They introduced World War II which, oh boi. Wonder how they’re gonna weave the muggle history and wizarding world plotline together.

Credence joining him also makes sense for his character. He wants to know who he is and Grindelwald offers him that. But Grindelwald plays him so well it’s also very sad to watch it unfold.

Credence is gonna be so powerful growing under his tutelage though.

The actors playing young Newt and Leta were awesome! Very good casting, very believable. Young Newt’s got Eddie Redmayne’s trademark Newt mannerisms down to a point - congrats to them both!

Newt the adult… well he is busy being Newt. He’s quite cute and clumsy, but he still has some growth to do as a protagonist. I like him being the main character though. He’s caring.

Yusuf Kama doesn’t get much screentime either. He’s part of the whole Lestrange family drama plotline. We don’t have time to get attached to the character.

We don’t relate much to any character, actually. Not to Credence, not to Dumbledore, not to any minor new character either. We might relate slightly to Newt’s rivalry with his brother or his difficulties in approaching the woman he likes as well as the difficulties Jacob and Queenie are facing as a couple buuuut that’s pretty much it.

There’s a scene at the beginning when we’re in the carriage and Grindelwald gets illuminated by lightning - he looks properly terrifying. My heart skipped a beat.

Newt and Leta’s relationship is really touching. It’s easy to see how they could have become close friends.

The Ministry trying to recruit Newt into the auror department like you seriously thought that was gonna work ? lmao

Jacob being charmed by Queenie is problematic…. but it’s interesting to see how Queenie evolves, how she could be driven to such desperations. In my opinion Jacob is a bit too quick to forgive something like this lol but yK

Newt just wants to get to Tina and that’s cute

God these two are just terribly awkward

I genuinely thought they were gonna kiss at one point though.

I felt bad for Credence seeing the servant who was a link to his family (or maybe not ahaa SPOILER) die like minutes after he met her. the poor dude.

So Credence is a Dumbledore uh. Wonder how that one skipped past Rita Skeeter’s sharp quill.

Credence blasting that hole in the mountain like YEAH BABY THERE YOU GO !!!!!

The niffler steals the blood pact Grindelwald keeps on him at all times and im like YES BABY THERE YOU GO TOO !!! GOOD BOY !

and idk there’s probably more to say but here you go

Now I’m saying all this but personally I have a really hard time caring about anything I’m saying or any of the characters. But that’s personal. 

[gnrsmut]

Izzy x Axl

Warning - Smut!

If you are not into Izzy and Axl then go ahead and skip. Remember this is an imagine. It’s not real. Otherwise enjoy. And if you have any suggestions then drop me a line. Please note I don’t do anything violent or non consenting. No imaginary people are harmed during the making of these imagines.

The show at the Cathouse had gone well, Izzy thought as he lit his cigarette and took another swing of Jack. The after party was in full swing, and he sat back and observed his band mates and hangers on. As usual Axl had disappeared, probably with some girl, and the others were drunk and either hitting on or getting it on with the ladies at the party. It was a pretty standard night for after a show. He hadn’t felt much like talking and so sat back and enjoyed the view. He had his mind on something else anyway.

Suddenly Axl strode into the room and grabbed his arm.

“Hey let’s get out of here.”

Izzy shrugged and followed him. Axls moods changed like the wind sometimes and you just had to roll with it. It was very early morning, maybe about 3 or 4am, he wasn’t sure. It was dark and no one was around. The odd car rolled by, but for the most part the streets were empty. They made there way down side streets and alleys, heading back towards the practice space. Axl was still wearing his chaps with just the tiny briefs underneath, his hair teased for the show. He followed behind and watched his ass as he walked. Since he had started wearing the chaps at the shows, Izzy couldn’t stop staring at him. It made him think of the old days.

Axl rattled on about some chick at the party and how he was initially interested, but got annoyed. Izzy nodded at appropriate places and continued to smoke and drink out of the bottle of JD as they walked.

They stopped by a public pool, locked up and closed for the night.

“Let’s jump the fence” said Axl. It’s so fucking hot, and I need to cool down.”

They didn’t need to jump it, as they found a gap in the fence where someone, probably with the same idea had cut a hole. The place was littered with garbage and graffiti. It was not the nicest of places, but the cool water beckoned and Izzy didn’t much care about the ambiance.

He watched Axl strip down and get in the water. He was starting to get hard again.

“Aren’t you going to come in?” He smiled at him as he swam around playfully in front of him.

Izzy wanted to come in but was afraid of giving himself away.

“Come in I know you want to.” He laughed and swam towards the other end of the pool.

Izzy decided that now that Axl was at the other end he would undress. It was dark and he thought this way his hardened member wouldn’t be so obvious. The cool water might help calm him down too he thought to himself.

Getting in the water he felt better already. It was hot, and the it was a relief to get in the pool.

Axl swam towards him with a smirk on his face.

“Do you like my ass in those chaps?”

“What?” Izzy was surprised and tried to figure out if Axl was joking or flirting with him.

“I know you like it.” He laughed. “I see you looking at me.”

He swam right up to him, and whispered in his ear as he grabbed Izzy’s cock.”Plus you have a hard on for me.”

“Cmon it’ll be like the old days, just you and me.” He kissed him hard on the lips still stroking him.

It had been a long time since they had played with each other. He assumed now that Axl was surrounded by girls, now that the band was starting to get better gigs and some attention, that he was no longer interested in him in that way. He figured it was the past and he should move on, that there Relationship had changed.

He had longed for it for some time. He kissed him back and started stroking Axl’s cock and playing with his balls. He knew he loved having his balls played with, he had not forgotten how to please him.

“We should go back to the practice space. We might get caught.” Izzy cautioned.

“Fuck getting caught.” Axl laughed. “Doesn’t that make you more excited?”

“Not really. I’d rather go somewhere private, but I don’t want you to stop.”

“You’re still such a prude.” Axl laughed. “Fine we’ll have it your way, but that means I get to go first.”

Axl pulled himself up onto the edge of the pool and turned around and sat on the edge.

“Before we go, suck me a little, like you used to.”

Izzy was eager to get somewhere more private but, knowing Axls moods did not want to argue with him. Plus he was enjoying the attention and didn’t want Axl to change his mind.

He swam up to him, licking the head at first, and then running his tongue along the bottom of his shaft. He wrapped his lips around him and stroked him with one hand while bobbing his head up and down on his member and studying himself on the edge of the pool with the other hand.

Axl moaned and gasped as Izzy worked on his cock.

“I forgot how good you are at this. Fuck you treat my dick right.”

Izzy felt himself get more excited and swollen. He missed their times together and couldn’t wait to get back to the space for more.

After a while, Axl stopped him.

“Okay let’s get back. I’m going to blow my load soon if you keep that up.”

The space wasn’t far. Izzy hoped the others were still occupied at the party. He doubted the others knew about them and didn’t want to risk them finding out. He was relieved to find there was no one there but them.

“Where were we?” He said kissing Axl and undoing his pants. He peeled the chaps off of his still wet body, from the pool.

They undressed each other quickly, eager to continue.

“Let’s go to the loft.” Axl suggested. The band had put a loft in the practice space so they could sleep or pass out as needed. It was also a great place for entertaining groupies.

Lying beside each other, they resumed kissing and stroking each other.

“I want you in my mouth.” Axl confessed.

Izzy turned around and lay on his side and they started 69ing each other. Having him in his mouth as he licked and sucked on his cock, Izzy started moaning. It was hot, but he felt more relaxed and able to express his pleasure than when they were at the pool. The pleasure was building and he wasn’t sure how long he could hold out.

Axl took Izzy’s cock out of his mouth and said “I told you I want to go first.”

Izzy lay on his front and lifted his ass for Axl to mount.

Axl spread Izzy’s cheeks and lubbed up his cock.

“I can’t wait to fuck you.” He thrust himself into Izzy and they both groaned in pleasure .

Axl thrust himself in and out slowly at first and then more rapidly. He did not hold back vocally as he enjoyed the tightness of his friends ass. Izzy grasped the edge of the loft with one hand and stroked himself with the other. Why had they stopped doing this he wondered. Axls moans and yells were getting loader and his thrusts got faster and harder. Suddenly he thrust himself in quite deeply and yelled, shuddering and falling forward on him as he came in Izzy’s hole.

He panted and lay on top of him for a moment getting his breath.

He pulled out, his cum leaking out of Izzy’s ass as he did.

“It’s your turn. And I know you like doing it standing up.

Axl got down off the loft, and bent over on of the amps. Izzy stood behind him and spread Axls ass cheeks apart. He put some lube on his asshole and on his cock, and slid his member inside.

“Fuck I’ve missed your ass.” He kissed the back of his neck and shoulders as he thrust himself in and out. He continued to groan and thrust himself into his friend, looking down and watching himself slide into Axl. It was so good and he’d thought it was over between them, he didn’t think he’d get to cum in his ass again. It didn’t take him long to feel that he was going to explode soon.

Axl encourages him on. “Fuck me with your dirty cock. Fuck me hard.” He kept telling him.

He couldn’t hold back any longer. He let out one last groan and exploded deep

Inside Axl. He nearly collapsed from the pleasure as he released himself.

“Damn that was good.” He said as pulled out and gasped for breath. “I missed your ass and cock.” He confessed.

“Why do you think I’ve been wearing the chaps?” Axl smiled at him. “I knew you’d like it.

Now let’s get cleaned up before the others get back.”