#it’s gluten free but i promise you can’t tell :3 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

beckydoesthings · 4 years ago

Text

various fics of hxl that i adore reading! this list is quite lengthy, but feel free to message me if you have any questions!

*will continue to be updated. also, if i mistagged you, i apologize, i do not know how to tumblr*

Love Is a Rebellious Bird

E | 134k | @100percentsassy and gloria_andrews

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

Don't hum Bolero.

i think this tickled every bone of my musical self and also made me cry (are you seeing a theme here??) one of the first fics i fell in love with and one i keep coming back to.

Collision

E | 226k | @tequiladimples

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

(Featuring Liam, the big and not-so-bad wolf who’s got a thing for humans, Zayn, a human with supernaturally good looks, and Niall, the cupid who just wants his job to be easier.)

the world building in this one is insanity - so much good mythology mixed in and it made me screech with joy. i think i can firmly say that i did not expect where the plot went, but that made the story so much better.

Flour and Chocolate

M | 145k | @danosphere91

It was nice, for a bakery he supposed.

Then he approached the display cabinet.

And the foreboding slammed into him. Because every product had letters next to it. Letters. GF, DF, V, O, VGN.

What. The. Fuck?

Lifting his eyes to the chalkboard menu spread across the back wall Louis felt physically ill. ‘Gluten-free’, ‘organic’, ‘vegan’, ‘paleo’, ‘dair-…’ Wait, what the fuck was a paleo? He had entered some hipster-trash establishment and it was more than time to get out.

Louis is a single dad and Harry works at the newly opened bakery down the street.

the miscommunication in this fic is SO REAL and makes for a good read. the rest of the flour and chocolate series is also fantastic. i thoroughly enjoyed both the ziam and ed/niall arcs that bring the whole story together.

run away home

E | 106k | @hattalove

Louis stands, in the middle of a clearing with his hands in his pockets, and stares. This boy—God, this gorgeous, gorgeous boy. He seems so clumsy, confused at the best of times, but there’s a wisdom about him as he speaks, a maturity that belies his age.

Louis is hopelessly, wildly attracted to him.

or, louis is a successful jockey down on his luck, struggling to get his life back on track after an injury. harry has a horse, a house fit for a prince, and a broken heart.

it takes them a while to figure out that they need each other.

this makes my inner horse girl extraordinarily happy - even if i don’t know anything about horse racing. louis’ story in this is beautiful and makes the whole piece worth a read.

waiting for the tides to meet

E | 60k | @nauticalleeds

Louis lets out a deep breath, thinking about Harry’s soulmate. Thinking about how Harry’s soulmate is probably as beautiful as Harry, some person that Louis cannot compare to, and how the universe has chosen them to be Harry’s. Fuck the universe. “Fuck you,” he calls out to the universe. He’s aware of how crazy he sounds.

Maybe he is crazy, with how he’s falling for Harry. And fuck that, too.

Soulmate AU. Everyone is born with heterochromia — one eye is their own eye colour, while the other is the colour of their soulmate's. It's only when they meet their soulmate for the first time that their own eyes match properly. After a hazy night at a frat party, Louis wakes up to blue eyes and the shocking realization that he had met his soulmate, without any sober recollection. Seven years pass where Louis comes to terms with the fact that he'll never know who his soulmate is. Then one fated summer, a beautiful green-eyed photographer arrives at Louis' workplace, with promises of endless laughter and a familiar feeling in Louis' heart.

Featuring a lovely cup of OT5, a road trip down the coast, and a scene where Harry eats a whole head of lettuce. Don't ask why.

gorgeous soulmate AU that gives me summer cruising vibes. worth the read for the lettuce scene alone (i kid, i kid)

Do Not Go Gentle

E | 70k | @afirethatcannotdie

“This is all a game to you, isn’t it? Well, it’s not for me. This is a real life or death situation,” Louis says, spitting the words at him. “And I just don’t think you’re cut out for it.”

For a moment, they stare at each other in complete silence. Harry can feel his blood thrumming between his ears, can see Louis glaring at him, feels red-hot anger. And then all he feels, oppressively and desperately, is lust.

Suddenly Louis is surging up to him to press his lips against Harry’s. Harry walks the two of them backwards, pressing Louis back against the door. Louis oomphs in surprise and brings his hands under Harry’s scrub top, scratching at his lower back.

“Lock — oh — lock the… fucking door,” Louis mutters.

When Harry Styles starts his first day as a surgical intern, he expects a lot of things: to treat patients, to observe a surgery, to feel a bit overwhelmed. What he definitely doesn't expect, however, is that the handsome guy he kicked out of his bed this morning is also an intern.

A Grey’s Anatomy AU where tensions are high, Harry and Louis are hooking up in secret, and no one has time for love. Or do they?

okay i’ve watched maybe 3 episodes of Gray’s Anatomy, but i feel like this encompasses the vibe of the show: medical stuff with a hefty dose of angst and sexual tension

Falling For Me Won’t Be A Mistake

M | 58k | @all-these-larrythings

Harry is married to his job and so overworked that he doesn't know how to stop. All it takes is a forced Hawaiian get-a-away, the warm tropical breeze of the island, and the most beautiful, elusive man he's ever seen to make him remember what living is like outside of work. Well, that, and the little souvenir he accidentally takes home with him.

one of my favorite mpreg fics so if that’s not your cup of tea, then don’t read it. i love surgeon harry with a vengeance, but honestly Gems and Niall are iconic in this one.

Watching the World Fall

E | 11k | @crazyupsetter why won’t it let me tag :(

This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.

“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”

It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.

“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.

“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”

i have a soft spot the size of Antarctica for Late Late AU fics (we stan James Corden) and for exes to lovers so this checks all the boxes.

autumn leaves

E | 27k | @suspendrs

“Brave?” Harry frowns, caught off guard. “No, not particularly.”

“You seem brave,” Louis decides, pushing off the wall and stepping on the butt of his cigarette. “You are strong, and you are not mean. That’s good,” he assures, touching Harry’s arm gently.

“Thank you, but that’s not true,” Harry smiles ruefully. “I’m really not anything special.”

Or, Harry is an American soldier in France during World War II, and Louis is a French waiter that doesn't mean to fall in love with him.

love love french AUs and while this one isn’t sunshine and rainbows, it’s a beautiful yet heart wrenching piece. warning for period typical homophobia

caught up in your love affair

NR | 8k | @disgruntledkittenface

“And the corgis took to you straightaway,” Harry remarks.

“That’s true,” Louis chuckles.

“I’ve spent the last 29 years being barked at,” Harry deadpans, jerking his hand toward Louis, “this one walks in, absolutely nothing.”

Louis outright giggles at that, saying, “They were just lying on my feet during tea.”

“Wagging tails,” Harry says, shaking his head.

“It’s because they don’t understand flirting,” Louis tells him, “you can’t charm them the way you do everyone else.”

Royal AU. Prince Harry announces his engagement to Louis Tomlinson in an interview with longtime friend and BBC host Nick Grimshaw. Inspired by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle.

just. 8k of royal fluff. that’s literally it and i adore it so much.

Apples Always Fall (As I Do For You)

M | 54k | @rainbowsandgucci

”Due to unforeseen circumstances, help is needed here at the orchard for the impending apple season. Looking for someone able to start within the next week or two at the most, is willing to do whatever miscellaneous tasks are needed, such as picking & packing apples, running the cash register, and other handywork that may need to be done. Must be good with customers, and able to lift up to 50lbs. Help will be needed until at the least the end of October. Please contact the number found on this page, or come out to the orchard and ask for Harry. All the love xx” --- Louis is staying at his Aunt's farm in a small town in Minnesota for four months. To deal with the boredom that sets in a week into his stay, he starts working at the local apple orchard, owned by twenty six year old Harry Styles. Louis quickly finds himself falling in love with the orchard, and he finds a family in Harry's friends Niall, Liam, and Zayn. He also starts to fall in love with Harry. Falling in love with him turns out to be the easy part.

i never thought i would enjoy an apple orchard fic?? but it’s so good?? farmer harry makes me laugh to think about, but the heartbreak in this fic is so. real.

Mine Would Be You

E | 114k | @crinkle-eyed-boo

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

exes to lovers drama but make it extra sad. the fact that we see so many facets to this story just makes it all the more painful, yet beautiful. this fic also reminds me of how much i love one mister niall horan.

One for Luck

E | 96k | @leavingonatrain

The very first time Louis remembers hearing Harry Styles' deep, deep voice, he's just won gold at the World Equestrian Games and he's officially back on Great Britain's Olympic team. He's also three sheets to the wind, drunk on victory and champagne, and there's a gorgeous boy whispering in his ear. Life's grand.

(AU: Louis and Harry are professional riders on the British Olympic team.)

again, i know nothing about horses, but i like to pretend i do for the sake of this fic. it’s beautiful, it’s smutty what else could you ask for?

Nothing But You On My Mind

E | 83k | @absoloutenonsense

Louis Tomlinson is a PR manager hired to improve the image of royal bad-boy Prince Harry Styles. Unfortunately for him, that means being faced with the Prince's constant innuendos, incessant dirty jokes, and relentless flirting. Louis just wants to make it to Princess Gemma's coronation; once she's crowned Queen, his contract is up and he never has to see the Prince again.

i absolutely. definitely. sobbed tears at this fic. it’s just so beautifully painful to read. don’t want to spoil anything, but this is a must.

Adore You

M | 67k | @isthatyoularry

“We invited our new acquaintances from uptown. You’ve simply got to meet their oldest son!” said his mother with a flourish, and suddenly it became abundantly clear as to why his parents had so adamantly demanded he join them in Deansville for the entirety of the summer.

Against his wishes, Harry spends the holidays at his family’s summer estate, and is reluctantly pulled into a courtship he didn’t ask for. Harry doesn’t want to get married, but Louis does. They don’t fit, but then again they really, really do.

Vaguely set in the 1920’s. Headpieces, jazz, fashionable canes, and flapper dresses, and that.

i strongly relate to harry in this one! one of my favorite historical AUs and honestly i love the thought of louis in well fitting suits.

leave it to the breeze

E | 81k | @hattalove

Louis couldn’t be prouder of his bake, but there’s something—there’s something. Something about Harry Styles and the earnest way he measures, pours, mixes, scrapes. Something about the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth as he knocks the air out of his batter.

or a great british bake off au in which louis cares about winning and winning only, harry is made of sunshine and rainbow sprinkles, and niall sticks his nose into other people's business. also featuring liam as louis's best friend-slash-concerned mother, and zayn as a macaron connoisseur.

i. love. the. great british baking show. baking + h&l is amazing. and another reminder as to why niall is the absolute best.

Paint The Sky With Stars

M | 62k | @icanhazzalou grrr let me tag

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom.

Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform.

By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help.

Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

gorgeous historical fic that’s so accurate and painstakingly written. i keep coming back to it!

When It’s Late At Night

M | 25k | @all-these-larrythings

Louis has zero interest in an ex-boybander turned solo artist when his appearance on the show gets announced, but that's exactly who he gets stuck with when Harry Styles shows up at the Late Late show to promote the release of his debut album. For an entire fucking week.

The Late Late prompt that we all need to get through this excruciatingly hard time.

remember when i said i love Late Late AUs? yeah. i love that louis gives absolutely zero shits in this fic until he gives all the shits.

Chasing Empty Spaces

E | 79k | @domestic-harry

The year is 1934 and Harry Styles was to inherent the largest tobacco firm in the south. His parents have picked out the “perfect” girl for him to marry and he has the privilege of receiving the highest education possible. The problem was, Harry hadn’t realized he didn’t actually want any part of that future until he met a mechanic named, Louis Tomlinson.

gorgeous historical AU that goes through Harry’s struggle with his sexuality wonderfully. this one also made me cry.

Resist Everything Except Temptation

E | 100k | @domestic-harry

The lethargic sound of heels clicking against wood resonated across the sea. Footsteps descended the staircase, every assured step creating a menacing aura as it grew closer. Perspiration gathered along Louis’ palms as the rhythmic sound halted in front of him.

“Captain,” Malik greeted.

Louis watched out of his peripheral as Malik’s boots shuffled back a few steps. Sweat matted the hair along the nape of Louis’ neck as he waited for something to happen. He felt as if a sharp blade was twisting his gut as the silence became tangible. There was a metallic slide of a sword being pulled out of its sheath, the sound startling Louis out of his cocoon of sterile shock. His shoulders jumped as the tip of a blade flattened underneath his jaw. Louis’ distorted reflection stared back at him in the polished metal. Engraved rose petals twisted his appearance as they crawled up the length of the sword. The sword lifted and took Louis’ chin with it.

Standing in front of Louis was Captain Styles.

The one where Louis is the commodore's son who is forced to become a part of Harry's crew when he is captured.

love this pirate AU that’s got one badass gemma styles. also, harry as a super cool pirate in gorgeous clothes makes me super happy!

i’ll make this feel like home

E | 49k

Harry to groans himself and then takes a deep breath. “Okay, well. Here’s the thing. I peed on a stick.”

Louis isn’t able to get more than a shocked “What!” out before Harry’s steamrolling on.

“I peed on a stick and it says it’s positive, but you always prattle on about how it’s best to go to the doctor’s before you get excited, you know to confirm it because sometimes hormones are off or you have like a tumor or some shit and get false positives and what if I’m dying and-”

“You’re pregnant?!” Louis shouts out, stomach dropping as the words leave his mouth.

“Um, yeah… maybe.”

[the one where Louis' hopelessly in love with his best mate... who just happens to be pregnant with another man's baby.]

baby momma harry with hot mess!Louis is a recipe for disaster, but this one has plenty of fluff to make up for it.

Hands Clasped Tight

E | 44k | @afirethatcannotdie

“What am I looking at here?” Harry asks.

“This, my friends, is a ‘proof’ Instagram account, run by your students,” Liam announces.

“It’s got all this stuff about how the two of you are together,” Niall adds.

“I heard about that,” says one of the math teachers. “Confiscated a kid’s phone today when they were looking at it. I have to say, the evidence that you’re dating is pretty damning.”

“Really,” Louis says dryly. “Do you think being married for three years might have something to do with it?”

Or the one where Harry and Louis are high school teachers and their students have been playing matchmaker for over a year. Little do they know, Harry and Louis are already married.

love love teacher harry and louis that’s mostly funny fluff with a little angst. just a teeny amount. reminds me of my own experiences with meddling students haha.

*updated 2/16/21*

#fic recs #hl #hlcreators #ao3 #in no particular order #message me for other fics!#yourlarrysource

50 notes · View notes

artiewiles · 3 years ago

Text

You Just Think You Love Me (3/7) Fact: Pidgeons can smell

“Agent Sterling! How can I help you?"

Lance smiled with his smile number two. "I'm looking for Walter. Do you know where he is, Martin?"

"Walter is in lab four. He's working on something dangerous."

He looked around the shared lab, where something exploded or ignited every now and then. "Of course, I understand. Thanks, Martin!"

"You’re welcome, Mr. Sterling ..."

But Lance was leaving already. Armed with a practiced number one smile, he walked through the corridors, his face completely calm. He’s going to do it today. He’s asking Walter on a date today. Maybe he'll turn him down. It does not matter. Nothing will change. They will stay friends. Everything will be fine. Everything will be alright. Everything will be fine.

(links to ao3 and wattpad)

He knocked on the lab door and entered the decontamination room when invited. He closed his eyes and let himself be sprayed with this and blown dry with that. When the green light came on, he continued. Along the way, he waved at the guy in the control room, who was in charge of the whole process. Then, he finally entered the lab looking as confident and normal as possible.

"Hi, Lance, what brings you here? It's great that you came!” Walter welcomed him and then followed with? "I have tested the new gadget I told you about. The one that helps you to get the bad guys on your side. You know, to make them trust you and after that to love you, to entrust their secrets, maybe even to persuade them to change careers. Wait…” He studied Lance carefully. "What's going on?"

He looked at him confused. "What, what should be going on?"

"You look ... pale. Is something wrong?"

"No." He shook his head quickly and exchanged the smile for a smaller and perhaps more plausible one. "I'm just a little tired, that's all. Tell me, what are your plans for tonight?"

"You really don't look well. What about my calming pillow, does it work? And wait, you didn’t have the canteen bread, did you? I'm sure it's not gluten-free, and you still have an upset digestive system because of the transformations."

"I'm fine. And the cushion works well, really. I sleep much better now.“ Lance waved his hand and tried not to pay any attention to his pounding heart. He should get himself together, for god sake!

"Okay. So, this one is done. Do you want to see it?"

He looked at Walter, who almost vibrated with enthusiasm. Was it just his imagination, or did his eyes shine? He smiled at him. "Yeah, I'd love to."

"Okay." He clapped and took a gray marble from a bowl. Although, when Lance looked at it properly, it seemed to bend slightly under the fingertips. "This is a mixture of gases and fragrant essences that directly affect the frontal lobe. And it works even when you have a cold. So we will not repeat Alaska again.“

Lance laughed softly. "That’s good. But we managed to slip out smoothly."

Walter pointed the ball at him. "You got out smoothly. I slid, and I still have bruises on my ass. I can’t believe it worked out. It was the weirdest fourth of July in my life.“

He raised an eyebrow. "Team Weird?"

Walter nodded with a smile. "Team Weird."

Is it just him, or do they look into each other’s eyes longer, than friends would?

It must have been longer than friends would look into each other’s eyes.

It was longer than friends would look unto each other’s eyes.

He made himself look at the gray ball.

Walter cleared his throat. "Um… yeah, so… Sure. Frontal lobe. Yeah. This," he pointed at the marble again, “will burst, and the air will release the scent. It's not very conspicuous, but it should be strong enough. I still plan on making it into a perfume that you can always wear. Just need to figure out how to give you immunity. It is a combination of our good old lavender with vanilla and sandalwood. Perfect for discovering any secrets and making best friends.”

He handed him the ball and put on a respirator. "Whenever you're ready, burst it."

He measured him suspiciously. "Why are you taking it?"

"Because I've been breathing it for a month, and when I overdose, I cuddle."

That wouldn't be so bad. He made himself look at the tiny ball in his hand. He took a deep breath.

"Wait!" Walter stopped him.

"What?"

He put on Lance an electrode cap and looked at his watch. "Go ahead."

Lance squeezed the ball between his fingers. It burst but nothing happened.

He frowned and looked at Walter.

"You have to wait. Breath in," he said muffled.

Lance listened. He smelled a faint scent. Smiled. It smelled nice. It reminded him of something…

"It works!" Walter cheered, watching Lance's brainwaves. "According to this, you are calmer and happier, aren't you?"

"Yeah," Lance smiled and took another deep breath. He felt calmer. He was fine. "Walter?"

"Yeah, Lance?"

"When we're done here, would you go on a date with me? Or in the evening? A film, dinner, or a walk through the art gallery sculpture park?”

Walter paled. "Oh no…"

The pleasant feeling was gone. Maybe he just didn't like the choices… “You don't want to go to the park? They still have summer opening hours, and you've said several times that you'd like to look at the statues. Or we can go to that cinema. We will find some with Korean movies… "

Walter was typing something furiously on his watch. "Not that."

Lance fell silent. He took off his cap and laid it on the table. Just calm down, nothing changes. "Okay, then no. It was just an idea.” He turned and smiled again. "Forget it."

"This is bad. This is very bad.“

Why doesn't he feel anything? Shouldn't it be sadder? He can't be in shock because of this.

"Hey, calm down." Lance wanted to put his hand on his shoulder, but then he changed his mind. "No need to make a fuss about it. Forget it. I have a meeting with the boss and then I have some other plans, so I'll see you tomorrow."

"Lance, wait!"

He changed his mind! "Yeah?"

"You have to stay here. This is science! I screwed it up! I'm so sorry, I don't know how, but I screwed up."

He shook his head and swallowed down the disappointment. "It’s cool. Don't think about it anymore. See you tomorrow."

"No, you don't understand! The scent was too strong! I didn’t plan it.” He shrank. "Are you mad?"

He sighed and rubbed the spot where the cap had pressed him a little. "No, I'm not angry. And you didn't screw it up. I feel good."

"Exactly. You feel too well. And it's my fault! I didn't mean to, but I promise I'll fix it! "

"Walter, calm down and tell me exactly what happened. Breathe.“

Walter sat down on a barstool and took several breaths. Then he began to explain: "The scent is to make the enemy your best friend. But I didn't expect what he would do to a best friend.” He looked at Lance and widened his big blue eyes. "I think I did create by mistake… you can call it a love potion."

Lance burst out laughing. "A love potion? What are you talking about?"

"You…" he pointed at Lance, searching for the words.

"I," he pointed at himself with his thumb, "am not under the influence of any love potion."

"But you invited me to dinner."

He gritted his teeth and nodded. "Exactly."

"Because you're under the influence of a love potion!" Walter insisted. "But don't worry, this should go away soon."

"No, I invited you because I love you, and it did not go away in months!" Well, the cat was out of the bag.

"You think you like me because of the smell. That is all. There is nothing more.“

He opened his mouth to argue. Closed it with a click. If Walter needs to believe it… Now he gets it. Walter is not interested in Lance. It gives Lance a chance to back off while both of them save their faces. It saves their friendship. He nodded. "All right. If you’re right… I'll take time off and go home. I'll try to sleep it off. If you came up with something or figure out how to speed the process up, let me know.“

"Okay," Walter nodded with relief. "Take care of yourself, alright?"

Lance smiled and ruffled his hair. As he always does. He can still do that, can't he? "Sure thing."

He went through the decontamination room, then the whole agency. Responded to the greetings of others out of reflex. The smile number three plastered on his face. He turned into a pigeon and flew away. How much rum and whiskey does he still have at home?

Probably not enough.

8 notes · View notes

primasveraas-writing · 4 years ago

Text

Finnpoe Modern AU- Single Dad!Poe- PART 3

AHH here it is!! I’m really happy with how it turned out; thank you again to the darling Eliane who sparked the orginal idea. The brunt of the story is done, but I hope (and suspect) that I will be returning to this AU soon, in the form of more headcanons or one shots.

I hope you enjoy! All requests are currently open.

Part One l Part Two l Part Three

XXX

Poe buys Finn a drink

...then Finn buys Poe a drink, then Poe buys them both drinks because Finn is on a teacher’s salary and the only gay bar within a reasonable distance gets away with overpriced beer

Poe learns rather quickly that Finn is more than just an incredibly attractive teacher who’s good with his son- Finn is also shy, and humble. Kind and honest. Slightly giggly when tipsy and rather close in proximity after 3 beers

There comes a point when Poe’s chest aches from laughing and he almost puts his hand on Finn’s knee- he almost leans in- then he remembers himself

Buying his son’s teacher a beer is fine- he likes Finn and so does BB

Kissing his son’s teacher is an entirely separate matter

Poe clears his throat abruptly, and he can feel the heat rushing to his already-warm cheeks as he straightens, pulling away from the other man

Finn pulls back too, a split second of hurt flashing across his face

“I’m sorry,” Poe says thickly, wondering how quickly he can flee the scene without seeming like a total ass, and Finn shakes his head

“Don’t worry about it,” Finn says, unable to fully meet Poe’s eyes. “I should probably get back to Rey, anyways”

Finn stands, and Poe blurts out “it was good to talk with you-” before he can think any of it through

Finn stops, turning back to look at him. He smiles, briefly, then says: “it was”

Poe is still sitting at the bar when Rey and Finn leave

Poe pretends he’s not watching them go

The upside to the next day is that his hangover is very mild, and that BB waits until 7am to wake him up instead of jumping into Poe’s bed at his usual 6am

Small blessings, even on a Saturday

They have a good day, and Poe is able to bury all his worries and regrets about Finn until BB does his homework

(he has to color in a hand turkey and he and Poe are both covered in glitter and ink by the end of it)

But the craft is enough for BB to start talking about school, which he does, pieces of glitter falling to the floor one by one as he signs

We do lots of art in Luke’s class and Finn helps me. He is nice and he brings in candy sometimes. He never rushes me or worries like Mr. C does and he is learning ASL very fast and sometimes he lets us stay out for recess for an extra three minutes and he will push us on the tire swing-

So Poe adds to his list of the way he can describe Finn- adored by his son. Generous. A total sucker for cute kids. Endlessly patient, a quick learner, a sweet tooth… off-limits.

What does he know about Finn, from a few hours of talking and stories from his son? Is it enough to justify his pining?

It doesn’t matter, in the end. At best, he and Finn are friends, and Poe has only BB’s best interests in mind- everything else is secondary to his son

The guilt and ache fade, for the most part. He sees Finn here and there, and the two men keep it friendly and brief

At parent-teacher conferences, Finn barely looks at Poe

It stings in the fall, but even that wound has healed when spring comes. Finn is still removed, a little less open, but he manages a small smile when Poe catches his gaze during the last conference that year

Summer arrives, and Poe has almost stopped dreaming of kissing Finn entirely

There’s a small celebration to celebrate the end of the school year, hosted by one of the PTA moms

BB takes off with some of the kids immediately, leaving Poe to his own devices

He’s half-heartedly participating in a discussion about gluten-free sugar cookies with some of the parents while watching BB chase his friends around the yard

He feels a light touch on his arm and turns to see Finn standing there, smiling

“I wanted to tell you what a delight it was to teach BB this year,” Finn says, “and that I’m sorry I won’t have longer with him.”

Poe starts, brow furrowing in surprise. “What do you mean?”

“I’m teaching preschool next year,” Finn says, looking down at his feet before glancing up at Poe again. “I originally applied to work with younger kids, but they didn’t have an opening until next fall.”

“So you’re not teaching BB anymore?” Finn shakes his head. “He’ll be devastated.”

Finn frowns, sadness filling his eyes, but Poe nudges him with his elbow, grinning softly

“I’m happy for you Finn, really. BB loved working with you.”

“I loved it too.” Finn is quiet, serious, and his voice falters before Finn goes silent. He blinks rapidly, and Poe realizes just how much Finn cares about his students

“We’ll have to have you over for dinner. To thank you.”

Finn’s eyes widen, wetness replaced with a brilliant spark. His mouth opens, then there’s the unmistakable sound of children colliding, a solid thud followed by squeals, giggles, and shouts

Poe sighs, looking around for BB, despite knowing in his heart of hearts that BB is almost always involved in whatever shenanigans are happening

“I should go.” Poe rests his hand on Finn’s arm. “We’ll work out a date later,” he says, winking before he turns around to chase after his son

When the time comes, BB is excited as Poe is nervous- he insists on helping with the cooking, which slows things significantly, if only because Poe has to sign each recipe and he runs circles around the small kitchen hovering over his son

BB has little regard for things like measurements or cation around a hot stove- about halfway through cooking the pasta needed for an old family recipe, BB tries to grab a noodle out of the boiling pot

Poe pulls his hand back just in time, rambling warnings and curses in Spanish and signing his worries and reliefs rapidly in ASL

BB stares up at him innocently, and Poe melts

He also puts his son on his back, so Poe finishes the cooking with a seven-year-old pointing where to go and what to do

They both have to squeeze in a shower before Finn arrives, as they’re each covered in sweat and sauce and flour

(Poe finds a bit of salsa behind BB’s ear as he towels his son off, and he sighs)

Poe is dressing when the door rings. First, he hears BB tearing down the hall, his feet thundering, then the door opening- Poe follows his son, finishing the last buttons on his shirt, then Finn is in his living room, BB tugging on his hand to bring Finn into the apartment

“Hi,” Finn says, kneeling down to hug BB

“Hi,” Poe says, and his heart flutters like it did a year ago, when he saw Finn for the very first time

It progresses from there because BB loves Finn, and Poe believes in love at first sight, even if he can’t admit it yet

(He loves Finn too)

Dinners with Luke, Leia, and Finn resume, in addition to meals whenever BB demands that Finn eat with them

(It’s been too long, Dad, BB will say. You and Finn are lonely without each other)

Poe doesn’t know how much he can disagree with his son, partly because BB is largely right, and partly because BB has Poe wrapped around his finger

Even so, it’s nearly a month before Poe asks Finn out properly, with no children or bosses to accompany them

Finn accepts in an instant

Dating Finn is nice- for one, he fits into Poe’s life easily- but he also validates the months Poe spent dreaming of the impossible scenario where he and Finn could finally be together, because dating Finn is better than Poe ever imagined

Finn is funny, more sarcastic than Poe had realized, direct and curious and teasing. Deeply loving and loyal and defensive and stubborn, and also a good kisser, with perpetually warm hands that always find their way into Poe’s grip

That summer is glorious, and none of them- Poe, nor BB, nor Finn- want it to end. It is the beginning of all wonderful things

Poe accepts quickly but with relative uncertainty, that Finn will be Poe’s boyfriend long before he will become one of BB’s caretakers

Finn is good with BB- he speaks ASL and understands his son better than most, and Poe is forever grateful he never had to navigate a wide dating pool as a single father, mostly because he’s certain there’s very, very few people worth bringing home to BB

Even with adjustment periods and the time it takes to figure out how exactly Finn fits into their lives, BB is wildly fond of Finn, who spoils him and makes him laugh

You smile lots when Finn is around BB says one day

Is that good? Poe signs back. Do you like when Finn is around?

Finn makes me happy BB says, and Poe knows that’s all that ever matters

November comes with an with the first snow; BB complains that he misses seeing Finn at school, but he sees Finn every weekend and most weekdays, so he’s satisfied, even if Mr. C is stuffy and old, but nice I guess

They are comfortable together- things are calm, settled into the new school year- and Poe figures he knows what to expect from life with a hyperactive seven year old and a boyfriend he’s hopelessly in love with

What’s unexpected, however, is the call he gets at 3am on a Friday night- or rather, the 6 missed calls, and the one that Poe finally picks up, his heart pounding wildly when he sees Finn’s name on the screen

He hit a pole, Finn explains, because he swerved to avoid hitting a cat

“I’m fine, honestly, Poe, the airbags went off and I was wearing my seatbelt and most of the damage is on the passenger side-”

Finn is fine, he promises, but his car is damaged fairly badly and also Finn rescued the cat, who is also fine, and they have no way to get home

So, Poe wraps BB in a blanket and carries him out to the car, and together they pick up Finn off the street in the dead of night

In five months of dating, it’s the first time Finn spends the night at Poe’s apartment with BB there

Finn sleeps on the couch, next to the makeshift nest of blankets where the kitten finally falls asleep

BB spends his Saturday writing a list of names for the kitten, who is entrusted to his care (and Poe’s) while Finn makes endless calls to a towing company and his insurance, and the bank and the local vet

Finn spends the next night, too, because he doesn’t want to move the cat, who is young and probably scared, and very attached to Poe and BB already

On Sunday, Finn goes to the vet to see if the cat is missing or chipped, and Finn leaves with a purring kitten that belongs only to him

BB is then allowed to name the cat officially; he becomes D-O, much to Finn’s amusment and Poe’s exasperation

(BB doesn’t deign to explain this decision, and Poe cannot bring himself to ask BB why this name was chosen more than ten times)

By then, they’ve also agreed that Finn will stay with BB and Poe until Finn’s car is fixed, so Poe can drive Finn to work, and so that D-O can stay with BB a little longer

Finn sleeps on the couch Sunday night, but BB sneaks out of bed to cuddle with the cat, and Poe finds them Monday morning, BB curled in Finn’s arms, D-O snuggled at their feet

Poe takes a picture before rousing them for school, and the picture is first the background on his phone, then printed and framed on the wall of their first home together

A smaller copy is slipped into his wallet, too, so that the three of them are with him, always

BB cries at the end of the week, when Finn has his car again, and he and D-O are ready to go home

(By Christmas, Poe has given Finn a key to the apartment, and by Feburary, they’re looking for a place to share together)

When BB turns eight, the three (four) of them move into the apartment that becomes their first home as a family, and it marks another beginning for them all

When BB turns ten, his father gets married, and he with his grandfather walk Poe down the aisle

Poe and BB are a family. This fact was slow and learned, but absolute all the same and Finn, still gradually, but just as certainly, becomes their family too

38 notes · View notes

commorsicoclub · 5 years ago

Text

The Commorisco Club (3)

If you were waiting for the real vore to begin, here it is people.

Soft, unwilling, male pred, male prey, belly bulges, teasing, fear play and brief mentioning of peanut allergies.

Chapter three: The Waiting Game

Archeon left them to contemplate their new roles with a promise that food would soon be delivered to them to aid in their recovery. Just before closing the door shut, he paused and peered at them through the crack, his red eyes glimmering with want. “Rest well, morsels.”

Once the teal door had shut closed and they were sealed inside, the velvet drapes fell again and they were left alone.

“If we don’t eat then we won’t get our strength back,” Michael said in a hushed whisper. “And then they won’t eat us.”

“You think that’s really gonna stop them?” James asked, irritated and angry. “That the big-fucking-giant-demon-monster things won’t just get pissed and eat us anyway?”

“We have to eat eventually,” Erin added despondently. She pressed the back of her head against the velvet covered wall. “And what’s the point in playing hunger strike chicken with those things? James is right. They’d just wolf us down anyway.”

“What are we going to do?” Valarie said, her voice trembling. “I-I don’t want to be eaten again...”

“Yeah, fuck that!” Michael said, disregarding his previous volume. “Neither do I!”

“No one does,” James said as he tried to crawl on his hands and knees back to one of the cushions and having a difficult time doing it. “If the plan is escape, we can’t when were all like this...”

“But by the time we’re better, they’re gonna be ready for suppertime!” Michael whined. “What are we supposed to do?”

Erin copied James and began to make the slow crawl back to her cushion. She was so tired and her head hurt and all she wanted was to sleep. By the time she made it to her velvet covered bed, she was crying. She heard the others still talking and their voices were raising and it sounded like James and Michael were arguing. She curled up, wishing she had the covers from her bed back in her dorm room. The room was not cold, but she missed the feeling of the soft cotton against her skin.

I have a math exam I need to study for, she thought inanely. It did not matter now, she supposed. Anything. There was nothing for them to do but wait. Wait for the demons to return, for them to grab them all up, and swallow them down again. She could almost feel the slime covered walls of the thing’s belly and she shuddered at the memory and forcibly shutting it down.

Eventually everyone became silent and she could hear their measured breathing as they all slept. But she remained awake. Despite the bone deep fatigue and the absolute desire to sleep...she couldn’t. Insomnia was not a new experience for her, but it was never this bad. If she had trouble sleeping she would normally go to the college’s 24 hour gym and run a mile or two so she could wear herself and her brain out enough to sleep. But now…she couldn’t even stand.

There was no concept of time in the room and it did not seem long at all after everyone had fallen asleep that the sound of the curtains pulling away could be heard. She sat up abruptly, her heart in her throat and every muscle tensed as she watched the door, waiting for it to swing open. Instead, a secondary and much smaller door set into the wood opened up – almost like a doggy door – and a squat and fat toad like demon waddled inside. It didn’t seem to have a neck, just a wide flat head that immediately attached to a rotund wide body all supported on stick thin legs and long flat feet. It had large yellow eyes draped with bumpy eyelids and stared ahead almost listlessly. It looked nothing like the other demons, there was nothing humanoid about him aside from being bipedal.

“Need to be opennin’ yur peepers, Meat,” it said in a low craggy voice, making its way closer to the cloister of humans with ambling steps. His wide flat feet making slapping sounds on the ground. “Master says I bring ya’s food so’s ya ready fer th’ eatin’. So’s foods I got.”

It’s lip-less mouth stretched alarmingly wide and it tilted it’s head back, revealing rows and rows of serrated teeth and a dark throat. Erin screamed and jolted the others awake and upon seeing the mud colored demon with its mouth agape and it’s hideous teeth, they too began to scream. The drama student who had passed out during Archeon’s vist sat bolt upright with a panicked cry and then looked around confused. Upon seeing the toad demon, his screams of panic joined the others.

The ugly toad hunkered down and with a disgusting squelching sound, regurgitated a metal box that shot up into the air and landed in between the cushions that James and Valarie were occupying.

“Oh my god, that is disgusting!” Valarie shrieked, inching away from slime covered thing.

“What the ever loving fuck is that?” Michael demanded. Whether he was referring to the toad demon or the box was unknown, but both seemed to upset him in equal measure.

The demon closed it’s mouth, sealing away its many teeth. “Likes I says: Master says I bring ya’s food so’s ya ready fer th’ eatin’.”

“Get the fuck away from us!” James yelled before falling off the back edge of his cushion and floundering to right himself.

“If you even think about trying to eat me,” Michael wailed. “I will kick you in your fucking demon nads!”

The toad demon did not seem to care how the humans around him were reacting and his yellow eyes did not seem to be focusing on anything in particular and seemed quite board. “Meat is all a hoolerin’ an’ a hollerin’ fer nothin’. Master says I ain’t supose t’ gobble ya’s ‘cause ya’s special no eatin’ meats. Says he’d be gobblin’ me if I’s be gobblin’ any of ya’s.”

“You mean Archeon?” Erin asked warily, eyeing the box. “Is...is he your master?”

“No’s!” said the toad in the first showing any real emotion. It looked almost insulted. “Archeon no master a’ nothin’. Master Rolland be master a’ Gobbler.”

“...G-Gobbler?” the drama student asked. He was pale and shivering.

“Gobbler is be me,” the toad grumbled as it turned back towards the door and began to waddle away, mumbling in displeasure. “Stupid meats not know nothin’. Archeon no master ‘a Gobbler...”

The smaller door shut with a bang and the draped fell back to their places.

“What...what the hell is going on?” the drama student asked. “Where’s the other guy? D-did….di I get eaten again?”

“No, you just kind of fainted,” James said. “And that...thing apparently was Gobbler. Archeon left a while ago.”

“...A-Archeon?”

“Big guy with horns,” Erin said. “You kind of missed introductions.”

Michael was crawling towards the regurgitated box, his face a mixture of disgust and curiosity. It was a munitions box with faded Chinese writing on the side. He reached out to try and flip the latch open, but pulled his hand back in revulsion as a thick cord of Gobbler spit draped from his hand back to the box. Michael began to fervently wipe his hand against James’s cushion.

“Augh! Gross, man!” James whined.

Michael ignored him and tried once more, using the tips of his fingers to finally flip the latch. It popped open easily and out spilled an impressive amount of prepackaged sandwiches. Despite the saliva and goo covered crate, the packages inside were untouched.

“Did that guy just swallow everything at a 7-11 or something?” James asked, reaching out to grab one of the sandwiches. He tiled the black plastic to read the label and then dropped it. “Ew, tuna.”

Erin slowly stood up, her legs only feeling slightly wobbly, and walked over to examine the pile herself. The others were doing something similar. She picked one up, a ham and cheese on wheat, and looked at the label. “They’re not even expired.”

“Seriously,” the drama student was saying. “We’re dead right? This...this is all bonkers.”

“I don’t know anything anymore,” Valarie said, pealing the plastic apart and tucking into a roast beef. She took a large bite and chewed methodically, tears starting to drip off her chin. “I’m so fucking scared and I’m tired and my head hurts and I’m so hungry...”

The drama student was picking idly through the offerings. “Anyone see any that says allergen free?”

“Why? You allergic to gluten or something?” Michael asked mockingly with his mouth full.

“No, just peanuts. I mean, so long as I don’t eat one I’m fine, but I don’t have my inhaler so if I have a bad reaction I’ll just die.”

Michael had the decency to look shame faced.

“Here,” James said, tossing a green plastic package over to the drama student. “It says allergen free on it.”

The drama student looked down at the label and shrugged tiredly. “Oh well. I guess beggars can’t be choosers...”

Michael was unwrapping a second sandwich, looking around their prison in idle fascination. “You know what?” he asked. “This room kinda looks like a stomach...”

Everyone froze mid-chew to take a moment to look about. After swallowing, they all looked at the remains of their sandwiches, appetites suddenly lost.

“Hey, blue hoodie kid,” James asked. “What’s your name?”

The drama student raised his eyes brows. “Huh? Oh, I’m Danny.”

“I’m James.”

“Michael.”

“Valarie.”

“Erin.”

“Just warning you Danny,” Michael added, his appetite abruptly revived as he took another bite. “Since we didn’t know your name at the time, Archeon said he was just gonna call you Snack.”

Danny scowled and averted his eyes and took a few moments to pick at the wilted lettuce in his sandwich. They ate in silence. Erin felt like she had a good idea of where their minds were at. She could already tell her energy was returning and now that they had food...well It was almost a matter of time now, she supposed. Feeling as though a great big clock hung over all their heads, counting down, they spent the next half hour eating their fill and waiting.

Waiting for the demons to come have their lunch...

…………………………………..

Only Erin and Danny were still awake. The others were quietly snoozing with Michael every so often making a loud snort and rolling over.

“Can’t sleep?” Danny asked her.

She shook her head. “Insomnia.”

“Pre-existing condition or newly acquired?”

Erin felt her face crack into a sardonic smile. “I’ve had it for a few years.”

Danny nodded, staring off into space. “How long do you think it’ll take? For them to come back.”

“Don’t know,” she replied with a sigh. “Archeon said they won’t come to feed on us until we’ve got all our strength back. I wonder how they can tell.”

“Maybe the can smell it,” Danny offered. A thunderous snore from Michael drew his attention and he added, “All I smell is bologna and Michael’s feet.”

Erin cracked another smile. She was beginning to really like Danny. Away from Archeon, he was witty and sweet. Not a whimpering mess that fainted when a giant demon flashed his teeth at him. Though she was sure she was no better. Like her, he was petite for their age, hitting their last real growth spurt before their metabolism could adjust. His blue hoodie was two sizes too big and he had his arms and legs tucked inside.

“If they just suck our energy,” he wondered aloud. “Why do they have to swallow us to do it?”

“Archeon said that’s how it’s done,” she replied, his words echoing in her head. In order for us to ingest your energy, we need to ingest you. She felt a shiver down her spine and the two sandwiches she had eaten sat heavily in her stomach.

“Archeon,” Danny said, the word seemed to quiver on his lips. “He...he’s the guy that ate me, right? So what about the others?”

“He never told us their names,” she replied. “But Gobbler said Rolland was his master. I suppose he’s one of them.”

“Gee, I wonder which of us is the luck meal,” he said sarcastically and then winced. “Ah, ignore me. The weird part of my brain’s kicking in. When I’m nervous I start saying stupid shit.”

“It’s alright,” she said and offered him a grateful smile. “I appreciate the attempt to lighten the mood.”

“So, what major are you?” he asked.

“Biology,” Erin replied and seeing the expression on Danny’s face, added, “It’s OK to laugh.”

“No,” he mumbled, biting his lips in an attempt to quell his amused grin. “I’m good.”

She shook her head. “You’re in the drama department right? Are you a theater major?”

“Nah,” he answered, pulling his arms and legs from his hoodie and standing up to stretch. “Music major. I’m in the orchestra that does all the theater department shows.”

She blinked in surprise and found herself smiling. “Oh really? What do you play?”

“I’m first chair guitar,” he said. “But I play a bunch of other stringed instruments.”

“Too bad you don’t have one with you here,” she said. “Some music sounds really nice right now.”

“When Valarie wakes up we might convince her to sing,” Danny said. “I’m pretty sure she’s a music major too. Vocals. I’m bad with faces since I spend most of the shows in the pit, but I think I remember her playing Fatine in last semester’s Les Miz production.”

She nodded and sighed.

“Man, I miss my ipod,” Erin lamented. “And my bed and blanket.”

“I miss not having to wait for a monster to come and eat me,” Danny said flatly. “It’s like all your worse nightmares from when you were a kid. Except real.”

Erin froze as the velvet drapes began to rustle and pull away. The teal door was already opening and in the blackness of the beyond, peered two glowing red eyes. Her mouth fell open and she flapped her hand at Danny in warning, unable to form words. He looked at her bizarrely and then understanding hit. He whirled around just as Archeon stepped into the room, his eyes glowing with hunger and teeth bared from behind grinning lips. His long coat was gone and he was rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, jeweled fingers catching the light of the orb above them and sending small flecks of diffused light bounces around the walls. “Snack time, boy.”

“Fuck!” Danny said, scrambling to try and make a run to the covering of the metal shelf, but he floundered and slipped on the plush cushion. Archeon easily stepped over the other sleeping humans to reach down and sweep a many ringed hand under to catch Danny around his middle just as he was about to face plant onto the floor. He was lifted up easily and he began to struggle and yell. The commotion had alerted the others and bleary eyes snapped open and they started scrambling back away from the demon, crying out in alarm. Archeon ignored them all, devoting his attention to his squirming prey as he dangled Danny above his face. The demon licked his lips idly and hummed in anticipation.

“I’ve had you on my mind all day, Snack,” he purred, lowering his hand just enough to flick his tongue out to give Danny’s feet a quick sampling. Danny pulled his feet away as best he could, but there was no where to go where the demon’s seeking tongue could not easily reach him. “The taste of you. The feel of you wiggling on my tongue. The delicious squirms as you settle in my belly...”

To emphasis this, he patted his stomach.

“Fuck!” Danny whined, trying again to keep his feet out of Archeon’s mouth. “Let go of me, man!”

“Heh heh. No,” Archeon replied with a grin and turned back towards the teal door. “You’re mine for the next few hours, Snack.”

From her spot under the overhang, Erin could see Danny still struggling in the large demon’s grip and could only watch and cry out for her friend as Archeon prepared to devour him for a second time. With a dark chuckled, the demon pulled the human closer. “In you go...”

Great jaws parted and threads of saliva hung from sharp teeth as Danny was thrust into the open maw.

“NO! Don’t do it! Don’t – mmph!” His cries were cut off as Archeon practically stuffed the boy inside, his hand pulling away as his lips pressed around Danny’s middle to leave his legs to kick and flail freely. His great horned head titled back and he opened his jaws again, Danny’s frightened cries becoming more audible for all of one moment before the Demon used his tongue to lift and pull more of his meal into his mouth. Just as the teal door closed, Erin heard the throaty chuckle and then a gulp. The door closed, the velvet drapes fell back, and Danny was gone. They were left alone with one of their number gone, on his way down to Archeon’s belly.

………………………………………

The next demon came only a few minutes after Archeon left. No one had moved or said anything as they waited, huddled close under the metal shelf. It was no real protection, but it felt safer than being out in the open. When the drapes pulled back again, everyone tensed up, sucking in shuddering breaths, and trembling.

The door opened and a new demon entered. Her skin was a shade of blushing pink and long white hair fell down around her shoulders and two bone white opalescent horns poked out from atop her head and curled around like a ram’s. He eyes were a brilliant deep blue and like Archeon before her, they glowed with clear predatory hunger. A large blood red jewel was set into a choker around her neck and she wore a short white blouse that exposed her flat belly and form fitting black pants that showed of her elegant curves.

“Hello,” she said, her voice sultry and disarming. “Poor little humans, you look so frightened.”

She knelt down and crawled on her hands and knees towards them, her head swaying back and forth like a snake, but her eyes never left the form of one particular human. Michael looked ready to bolt at any moment, suddenly finding himself face to face with the demon who had swallowed him once before.

“Don’t worry, though,” she said to Michael, shoulders hunching to make her breasts push out and she stared at him in a coy and flirtatious manner. “I don’t bite.”

“It’s not your bite that I’m worried about!” Michael squeaked.

Her eyes seemed to sparkle with amusement. “No? Oh you don’t mean that you don’t want me to eat you, little man?”

“Yes! Yes, that very much, please!”

“Oh, but I’m not so bad,” she said, pressing closer still and using her hands to cut Michael off from escape. Her fingers traced along his chest in teasing circles. “I’ll be much gentler this time. And I’m oh so soft inside, I think you’ll find my tummy to be very cozy.”

“FAT CHANCE OF THAT LADY!” Michael was wild with hysteria and as he tried to run, her fingers wrapped around him. “Oh sweet Jesus!”

“But you look so yummy,” she purred, pulling him closer to her face where she nuzzled him. “You smell good too. I was so happy when we met the other night. You made me feel so good. Fuller than any of those lower ghouls ever did. I want that feeling again. Of you inside me, wiggling. I want to taste you...” her tongue slipped out and drew a slimy line down the side of Michael’s face. “Mmmm…oh you’re as delicious as I remember.”

Michael was incoherent in his panicked ramblings and could do no more than fruitlessly struggle. He was not a small guy and the Demoness seemed to have no trouble at all keeping a firm handle on him.

“Be good for me, darling,” she whispered to him. “I’ll make this quick.”

Her mouth opened wide and in Michael went, her saliva coated tongue peeking out the sides of her mouth as she tasted him with open relish. She kept a firm grip on Michael’s legs and made her first swallow. He sank into her gullet and before he could react, she swallowed again. It only took her four swallows to down all of the broad shouldered athlete and the captive and horrified audience watched as her smooth flat middle sank with her meal’s weight. It began to jiggle and sway as Michael made his protests known. She pressed a hand to her belly and sighed in delight, eyes closing as she concentrated on the delicious feeling of live, wiggling prey. “There we are, my little human. Nice and cozy, like I promised.”

She carefully stood up, one hand cradling her stomach and she licked the fingers of her other hand. “It’s no wonder you humans are so prized. Your flavor is divine.”

“You’re monsters,” Valarie sobbed, covering her face.

The Demoness tuned her head to look at the girl and she smiled sweetly, licking her lips. “And you’re yummy.”

With an energetic sway of her hips, the Demoness sauntered back to the teal door. She stopped and turned back to the remaining humans.

“Oh! And I’m Lyra by the way. Forgot to introduce myself. Forgive me, I can never recall my manners when I’m famished,” she said, both hands leisurely petting her bulging belly, seeming to relish each kick or jerk of her meal. “Egan should be paying you all a visit shortly. Ta-ta!”

The door closed, the velvet drapes fell, and then they were three.

21 notes · View notes

themiscyra1983 · 4 years ago

Text

Cassandra’s Half-Assed Cuisine in Quarantine: Low and Slow Beef Stew Over Noodles

Good evening, cats and kittens, and welcome to the last of my recipes, at least for the time being. This one will perhaps be judged less harshly by the esteemed @docholligay, your friend and mine, as it does involve some actual proper cooking. I’m not saying no judgment. I am saying less.

As with my Hot and Horrific Chili Queso, I don’t have a specific provenance for this dish. It’s based on something my parents would make for me and my sister since our childhood, well before I can remember. The Lease family has roots all over the place, if by ‘the place’ you mean Europe. Most immediately, we are Swedish (via my grandmother, an immigrant), Scottish (via my great-grandmother, through whom I am linked to Clan MacGillivray, if only unofficially, as that was her maiden name), and Irish (via my grandfather; the less said about him the better, but I like Ireland even as I loathe that no-account bastard through the mists of time). Any part of our heritage could have inspired this simple, hearty meal, though more likely my parents found it on the back of a gravy packet or something and added it to our repertoire. Truth be told, a lot of our family recipes were things my parents initially found on a package, which then mutated over the years when they lost the original recipe; such is the case with our Chili Ole, an amalgam of ground beef, tomato paste, macaroni, beans and various spices. No idea what that dish was originally. No idea how to actually make it.

And, though I do know how to make this, I similarly have no idea where this actually came from.

But this was a special meal for us. Simple but time consuming, it was a bit infrequent in our family meal rotation, making it special for us. Today I make it strictly on special occasions, when I have a whole day to myself, as it involves the slow cooker and while I know the point is to just let the thing run, I don’t like leaving it completely unattended. So this is a Christmas and birthday kind of meal for me. And it was my dad’s specialty; since he now lives a thousand miles away, it’s not like he can make it for me.

Now, my dad doesn’t cook very much, and even less these days, it seems. His girlfriend was shocked to learn I thought highly of his gravy, but I do have fond memories of him making gravy for our Thanksgiving dinners and for this dish. He gave me the best instructions he could recall, but the truth is, I’ve never been able to make the stuff thicken the way I like - the way he could. So, because I can’t actually advise you on making gravy, and in the spirit of this being half-assed, I’m going to tell you to add premade gravy. But in the course of this recipe you’re going to end up with a by-product that could certainly be the basis of a gravy or a broth, so I’ll tell you how my dad said to make the gravy at the end, even though it doesn’t work for me.

But let’s start with the half-assed version. As I said: this is a time-consuming recipe, but also a simple one. It involves a few ingredients, a bunch of waiting, and then tasting and adjusting to taste as you finish it off. The most expensive part will be the steak. You can use stew beef if you prefer, but I actually found my experience using small, tender steaks much more satisfying. It was necessity inspiring invention when I couldn’t get stew beef but now I actually prefer it. You can also use onion powder instead of diced onion (in fact this is what my dad does), but I find the latter makes things more flavorful. If you want to use onion powder, I’d say add a couple tablespoons.

Here’s what you’ll need.

The Stew:

About 24 ounces worth of tender angus steaks

One small or about half a medium onion, freshly diced

Two tablespoons of garlic powder

Salt

Pepper

About 24 ounces of premade gravy (Heinz Savory Beef Gravy works for me)

The Noodles:

One 12-ounce package of egg noodles

One stick of butter or margarine (or four ounces for those of you who don’t get the stuff in quarter-pound sticks)

Cut the steaks into bite-sized chunks and place into your slow cooker or Instant Pot. Add the diced onion and garlic powder, and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Cover this mixture with water - about 4 cups, enough to cover everything. Stir until you feel the ingredients have been distributed evenly. Put your slow cooker on low and leave to cook for eight hours.

After eight hours of cooking, remove the mixture from the slow cooker and drain, saving the water for other uses if desired. Put the drained mixture in a large saucepan and heat over low heat on your stovetop, adding the gravy and stirring often. Taste occasionally and add more garlic powder, onion powder, pepper and/or salt to taste.

In another pot, prepare the egg noodles as directed on the package, bringing enough water to cook them to a boil, adding the noodles, and stirring occasionally until tender. Once they’re ready, drain the noodles. Cut up the margarine or butter and add it to the pan, then return the noodles and stir thoroughly. Add a little olive oil as well if desired.

When the noodles are done and the beef stew is sufficiently hot, you’re ready to serve. I like to put the noodles in a bowl first, add some grated mozzarella on top, and then ladle the beef stew on top of that, adding salt and pepper if needed and to taste. You can also mix it all thoroughly and in fact this is sometimes what I do with leftovers (leaving out the cheese, which I add after reheating). The stew also goes well over potatoes as prepared in a variety of ways - mashed, boiled, those little red potatoes perfectly cooked, you name it.

This can easily make six servings or so, or four very hearty servings. I beg you to have a salad as well - I make a point of eating my greens. This is a lot of starch and protein and you should get some more veggies in there.

So What About the Gravy?

Again, I’ve never been able to make this work. Perhaps it’s the corn starch that’s giving me problems - my dad was diagnosed with celiac several years ago and stopped using flour. We could have noodles made from wheat (made in a separate pot, and tasted by the non-celiac folks in the house), but he had to taste the gravy to make it properly, so: gluten-free gravy. If you already know how to make gravy, you should use your process.

But this is what my dad told me.

You will need:

About two cups of water

About 3-4 heaping spoonfuls (my dad was not specific, I went with tablespoons) of corn starch (my family always used Argo brand)

Some Gravy Master, mainly for coloring - maybe about a teaspoon at most

When the stew mixture is done in the slow cooker, do NOT drain it off - add everything to the saucepan. In a separate vessel, mix the water, starch, and Gravy Master into a slurry, then add this to the pan as well. Stir everything together, heating over low heat, tasting occasionally. Add additional water if you find the gravy is getting too thick (spectacularly not a problem for me). As in the above process, add additional spices while cooking to taste.

Last Notes

To be honest, the “or margarine” up there is about my personal taste - it’s what I grew up with, as my family was often poor. We had butter, but used it sparingly, sticking with margarine for a lot of our cooking, including pasta. Butter tastes too...’buttery’ to me on pasta now. I use margarine (and I’m specific about the brands I like; I used to use Promise but after I started having trouble finding it I switched to Land O’ Lakes); you may very well prefer butter. I wouldn’t call either option exactly healthy.

In my dad’s version of the recipe - which uses stew beef and onion powder and involves his own gravy, as described above - he also browns the beef before adding it to the slow cooker, no more than about five or ten minutes in a frying pan over fairly low heat. I’ve never found this step necessary in my version of the recipe but you may like the effect.

...now I’m thinking about that Chili Ole my family used to make, whatever the hell that actually was before we got our grubby little hands on it. I’ll have to see if my dad remembers how we made that. But that’s all the ‘recipes’ I have for now; a LOT of what I eat otherwise boils down to ‘follow the directions on the package’ or ‘make a goddamned sandwich’ or ‘okay it’s a burger, cook a burger and slap it on a bun and top it with stuff’. If I think of anything else, well, my keyboard’s always ready to go.

For now, stay safe, stay healthy, and try to eat better than I do.

#cooking #cassandra's half-assed cuisine in quarantine #food #not actually sure this qualifies as a proper stew #but you know aside from using premade gravy i think this isn't the worst #anyway it's veggies beef and gravy #what else would make it a stew

4 notes · View notes

trashcanmarvelfan · 5 years ago

Text

(Not-At-All) Dirty Little Secret

Summary: On National Coming Out Day, Richie gathers the Losers together for dinner before the first show in his new stand-up tour.

After the show, he & Eddie have a Conversation.

Warnings: Usual Richie trashmouthing.

Word Count: ~2200.

Author’s Note: How many different fix-its can I write that involve Reddie getting together? Idk, but I’m having a blast doing it. :D.

In honor of National Coming Out Day. To all my LGBTQ+ friends & readers, you are seen & heard. Don’t let anyone ever let you feel like you’re less than your worth.

CROSS-POSTED ON AO3

Richie Tozier checked his phone one last time as he finished rehearsing for his new stand-up show, pulling up the Losers group text thread and scrolling back to the beginning of the conversation about his show that night. Hey so, uh, my new tour is kicking off at the Laugh-Out-Loud Comedy Club in San Antonio on October 11th and I'd love for you all to be there. I'll be there all weekend if you guys want to come.

He had held his breath as the replies started rolling in from everyone but the one person he most wanted to hear from.

BEV: Ben and I will be there!

BEN: We wouldn't miss it for the world.

MIKE: Of course, man.

BILL: Absolutely.

Finally, after what seemed like forever (although it probably was really only 20 minutes) the last reply came.

EDDIE: I'll be there.

Richie had let out a huge sigh of relief and responded with, Thanks, guys. I'll tell my manager to arrange everything and get you all VIP tickets. Thinking we can do dinner before the show.

BILL: Sounds great!

MIKE: I'm down.

BEV: Losers' Reunion Dinner! :) <3

EDDIE: No Chinese though. I still have an aversion to fortune cookies.

Richie had laughed before replying. I'm with Eddie on this one. I'll check for some recommendations.

They had ultimately decided on The Esquire, a tavern near the club that had come highly recommended by some of the locals from the club.

Richie's manager had booked everyone at the same hotel that Richie was staying at for the weekend, at Richie's insistence. Since Richie had to rehearse, he had told the other Losers that he would just meet them for dinner and had arranged for a car to take them from the hotel to dinner and the club and back. He had arranged for his own transportation just in case what he had planned tonight didn't go well.

A new message came in.

BILL: Richie, you said a CAR was picking us up from the hotel. This is too much.

Richie grinned. Technically, a limo is a car. Besides, I told you guys you were getting the VIP treatment.

EDDIE: What he means is thank you.

BILL: Richie knows what I mean.

EDDIE: We'll see you soon.

Richie's mouth went dry. He grabbed the bottle of water he had stashed by the microphone and took a long swig. Showtime.

He climbed into the Uber he had called and greeted his driver, then practiced the speech he had prepared in his head the entire ride over to the Esquire, his hand shaking nervously. Come on, Tozier. Get your shit together. You can battle a psychotic killer space-clown twice, you can do this.

Soon (too soon?) the car stopped in front of the Esquire.

Richie thanked his driver and headed inside, taking a deep breath as he headed to the private room he had reserved for their party.

"What's up, fuckers?" he said, entering the room.

"Richie!" a chorus greeted him.

Ben wrapped him in a hug first, followed by Bev, who also gave him a kiss on the cheek. Mike, then Bill shook his hand, then finally, Eddie.

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Eddie was wearing jeans, a button-down shirt that was open at the collar, and a black leather jacket, and Richie honestly thought that Eddie had never looked hotter. He suddenly got nervous again. Fuck, I can't do this, he thought. Actually, shit, I have to. It's not right to let them find out later with everyone else.

They sat and ordered drinks, with Richie making his a double. He had promised his manager that he wouldn't get drunk before the show, but he never said anything about a little liquid courage.

After their drinks were delivered and they had placed their orders, Bill had raised his glass. "I'd like to make a toast to the man of the hour -- Richie, who has brought us together -- but we're not fighting a multi-dimensional demon clown this time, are we?"

Richie looked around. "Well, no, I don't see Eds's mom anywhere, do you?"

"Hey, fuck you, bro," Eddie said, but with no heat to it.

Richie cleared his throat. No time like the present. "Actually, I do have something to talk to you guys about."

Five pairs of eyes watched him expectantly.

He fiddled with his glass. "I, uh… I'm, well…" He looked up to the ceiling as if it could give him the courage to say what he needed to say.

He felt a hand on his wrist, then glanced down to see Eddie's black leather-jacketed arm give him a gentle squeeze before retracting. Suddenly his own words came back to him: You're braver than you think.

He took a deep breath. "I'm gay."

Silence followed his statement until Beverly stood up, walked around the table, and wrapped him in a hug. "Thank you for being brave enough to tell us," she said, which prompted the others to also get up and give Richie a hug and their own words of affirmation.

Richie was probably imagining things, but it felt like Eddie lingered in his embrace a little longer than necessary. He didn't have time to dwell on the thought though because soon after, their food arrived.

Dinner went normally, with the only mention of Richie's sexuality being Ben asking politely if Richie was seeing anyone.

Richie shook his head. "No, no, not seeing anyone right now. Honestly there really haven't been too many guys I've been interested in lately." He had shot a quick glance over at Eddie, who was currently studying his gluten-free turkey burger like it was the most fascinating thing he had ever seen. Just one in particular.

After dinner, Richie joined the others in the limo on the way to the club. With six people in the car, it was a bit crowded, but Richie definitely didn't mind Eddie sitting close to him.

Once they had gotten to the club, Richie headed backstage while the Losers went to their seats.

Soon it was time for the show. Richie pumped himself up while he waited to be announced. You fucking did it, man. You came out to your friends and the world didn't end. You're not dirty, or wrong, or broken. You're still Richie.

He was surprisingly calm as he made his way onstage, knowing that he had the support and love of the people who mattered most to him.

"What the fuck is up, San Antonio?" he greeted the cheering audience. "How you guys doing tonight?"

He grabbed the mic off of the stand. "It's so fucking great to be kicking off my new tour here. So I was near my hotel earlier, and…"

Richie fed off of the energy of the crowd, getting more laughs with his all-original jokes than he had ever gotten with his old writer's stuff.

"So I had my sexual awakening at 13," he continued, grabbing ahold of the mic stand for support. "And I'm gonna preface this by reminding you guys that I grew up in the 80's. Any Gen-X'ers in the house?"

Hoots and whistles pierced the air.

"Awesome, Ok, so yeah, anyway, I had my sexual awakening at 13. I had this group of friends, and the summer I turned 13 we all went swimming at the quarry in my hometown, and this group of friends had this one particular girl - you know the type. I mean she was beautiful -- milky white skin, fiery red hair, she was just gorgeous." He sent Bev a cheeky wink before continuing. "So anyway, all us guys are staring at her while she was sunbathing and all of a sudden it hit me -- I had no attraction towards her what-so-ever."

He paused and let his words sink in before continuing. "Then I look over to another one of my friends and it was like a chorus of angels started singing. Beautiful, amazing girl -- nothing. Pale, skinny little white guy -- instant boner. You guys have no idea how hot a pair of long legs in some short-shorts and a fanny pack were to teenage me. They say if you jerk off too much you could go blind…" He exaggeratedly pushed his glasses further up oh his face. "Well, I guess that was pretty much the truth in my case." He paused as the crowd laughed.

"So yeah, in honor of National Coming Out Day, surprise, motherfuckers!" Richie chuckled as the audience cheered. "Thank you so much for being so supportive and such a great crowd -- I'll see you next time!" He waved before making his way off stage.

"Richie, that was brilliant!" his manager said, handing him a napkin to wipe the sweat off his brow. "You killed it! Listen, I've already been fielding calls from Out Magazine and a couple of the late-night talk shows…"

Richie shook his head. "Can we talk about this tomorrow?" he said. "Tonight I just want to celebrate with my friends."

"Sure, sure. I had them escorted back to the limo since you already did your meet & greet with the other VIPs."

"Thanks, man." Richie tossed the napkin in a nearby bin and made his way to the back of the club, where the limo was waiting for him.

He threw open the door and climbed in. "So what did you guys--" he cut himself off.

The limo was empty except for one person. Eddie looked up from where he was sitting. "Hey, Richie."

Richie looked around. "Where's everyone else?"

Eddie looked uncomfortable. "They, uh, they said they'd meet us back at the hotel and went ahead and got an Uber. Can we talk?"

Richie froze. Shit. "Um, yeah, sure Eds." He closed the door behind him and made his way over to the seat, leaving a good bit of space between him & Eddie. "What's up?"

Eddie bit his lip. "I didn't announce this during dinner because I didn't want to overshadow you coming out, but… I divorced Myra once I got back to New York."

Richie had been so distracted by Eddie in his black leather jacket, exuding just a *hint* of bad-boy appeal, that he had never really looked at Eddie's hands. Sure enough, Eddie's ring finger no longer bore the gold band that he had been sporting the last time Richie had seen him. "Holy shit, dude. I honestly wasn't sure if you had it in you."

Eddie smiled softly. "Well, a wise man once told me that I was braver than I thought, so as soon as I got home I packed the rest of my stuff and told Myra that I wanted a divorce. I played it safe for so many years and was so warped by my mother that I pretty much wound up marrying her clone. Myra was just like her, even down to her buying my clothes."

Richie blushed and cast his eyes downward. "Um, yeah, I kind of noticed you looked different tonight. You uh, you look good."

Eddie shrugged and smiled shyly, then took Richie's hand. "Tonight, in your act, when you publicly came out… You said you had been attracted to one of your friends who wore short-shorts and a fanny pack. You were talking about me, weren't you?"

Richie squeezed his eyes shut. Fuck, fuck, fuck. "Um--"

"Rich? Please tell me that wasn't just part of your act." Eddie's voice sounded so hopeful that Richie's heart squeezed. He dragged his eyes back up to Eddie's. "No, not at all. Shit, Eds, you have no idea how much I lo--"

He was cut off by Eddie's lips on his own.

Hoooooooly fuck. Richie melted into the kiss, scooting closer and reaching up to gently caress Eddie's face. "Oh my God, Eds…" he muttered against Eddie's lips.

Eddie broke the kiss. "I know it's probably obvious by now, but I'm gay too," he replied. "And I'm in love with you. I've been in love with you for over 28 years now. Ever since we were kids."

"Fucking Christ, I love you too," Richie said breathlessly, pulling Eddie back to him for another kiss. He licked his way into Eddie's mouth, savoring the taste of mint (wait, did Eddie actually fucking brush his teeth while he was waiting on me? he briefly wondered) and Eddie.

Once breathing became a necessity, they broke apart and Richie leaned his forehead against Eddie's. "Jesus, this is like the beginning of every single one of my childhood fantasies come true," he panted, his hands still on Eddie's face.

Eddie wrapped his fingers around Richie's hands. "Mine too." He turned and placed a kiss against Richie's palm where his oath scar used to be, a kiss so tender that it made Richie want to cry.

Suddenly the limo stopped and the driver's voice came over the speaker. "Mr. Tozier, we've arrived back at your hotel."

"Uh, thanks," Richie replied, before turning to Eddie. "So what do we do now?"

Eddie smirked. "Well, first we need to go have another coming-out with our friends in the hotel bar, then after that I'm dragging you upstairs, where we're going to fulfill the rest of our childhood fantasies."

And they did. Repeatedly.

#tcmf writes #it: chapter two #IT: Chapter 2 #Richie x Eddie #Reddie

43 notes · View notes

bentonpena · 5 years ago

Text

How to Start a Cannabis Business On a Budget

How to Start a Cannabis Business On a Budget http://bit.ly/303gpri

So you've got a big idea (genius, of course) but little money to play with. What's the first step? These scrappy entrepreneurs have some advice.

August 13, 2019 10 min read

This story appears in the August 2019 issue of Green Entrepreneur. Subscribe »

From the outside, it looks like the race to get into the cannabis space is available only to people with enough capital to pay cash for a five-bedroom home. But in reality, there are a ton of thriving businesses in all segments of the cannabis market that started with a great idea and just a piggy bank of savings. Here are three companies that bootstrapped their way to success from an initial investment of $5,000 or less -- in fact, way less -- plus advice from the founders on how you can do it, too.

Fruit Slabs

The founders: The creation of Roxanne Dennant and Brian Cona, Fruit Slabs are basically like middle-school-style fruit leathers: chewy, ultrahealthy kosher snacks infused with 100 milligrams of THC and made from 100 percent USDA-certified organic ingredients. The company sells four flavors, including Grape Ape and Mango Maui Wowie; a new collab with drag queen Laganja Estranja, called Pride Passion Fruit, is hitting shelves soon.

How much they started with: Less than $1,000.

What they did with it: Bought equipment and materials.

Their origin story: Dennant was working in the denim world, and her longtime friend Cona was in cultivation; the duo were dabbling with consuming edibles but disappointed that they couldn’t find products that fit their healthy lifestyle. So, after buying cooking equipment, they started experimenting in their kitchens, making concoctions from the organic ingredients they liked to eat. Once they nailed their first batch of Fruit Slabs, they sold them to friends and family, and reinvested the money into their second batch. Since founding the company in 2015, Dennant and Cona have continued the same bootstrapping strategy, without taking any outside investment money. And it has worked. The product is in 65 stores in Cali and will expand to Washington soon.

RELATED: 9 Business Ideas for People Looking to Cash in on the Marijuana Boom

The biggest hurdle: Trying to upsell a new product when they launched. Fruit Slabs’ organic ingredients make it more expensive than most edibles -- and therefore more expensive to sell, even wholesale. “In 2015, it was a very raw industry,” Dennant says. “You could walk in [to a dispensary] with a Rice Krispies treat you made in your own home that was wrapped in cellophane…and get five dollars out the door.” But the price of Fruit Slabs? “People would look at me like I had 10 heads.” Today expectations have really changed, she says. “A lot of shops won’t even take an edible if it doesn’t have some type of vegan, gluten-free, or kosher dietary specification -- because people are shopping in that manner.”

And the best lesson learned: When a business is starting out, says Dennant, “you can’t make that $2,000 packaging and screw up, and be like, ‘Oh, it’s [only] $2,000.’ It’s like: ‘Two thousand dollars -- how are we going to recover from that?’” After facing a few such setbacks due to bad partners, she and Cona realized that vetting whom you work with is critical. That’s true even as the industry becomes more regulated. “Whether you’re working with a license partner, a distribution partner, a packaging partner, or a co-manufacturing partner,” she says, “really learning what that partnership is going to bring you in the beginning, and getting term sheets written, setting deadlines for the people and not just the vendor you’re working with -- that’s been a big [lesson] along the way.”

Image Credit: Brad Wenner | Getty Images

Plant People

The founders: Plant People sells CBD tinctures, capsules, and salves made with cannabinoids and other beneficial herbs. “Our mission is to heal and connect people and the planet through the power of plants,” says Gabe Kennedy, who started the company with Hudson Gaines-Ross.

How much they started with: $5,000.

What they did with it: Developed their product and got it out the door.

Their origin story: Longtime friends Kennedy, a chef, and Gaines-Ross, a CPG entrepreneur, were on a hike when they started talking about something they had in common: back surgeries. They’d both been unhappy with the care they’d gotten from traditional Western medicine. Kennedy knew there were other options. He grew up with parents who are acupuncturists; his mother is also a Chinese herbalist, and his dad, a chiropractor. And he leveraged that knowledge to get Plant People’s initial inventory off the ground. “We began packing herbal capsules in our kitchens, used stickers as packaging labels, and gave product away to our friends and families to get feedback, learn, and iterate,” says Kennedy. “These grassroots efforts really worked out for us, as people responded well and started asking for more Plant People. We were overwhelmed by the demand.”

RELATED: Women Are Disappearing From the Cannabis Industry. Why?

The company launched in 2018. “I had a lot of experience building products from seed to sale, so we hit the ground running,” Kennedy says. “Hudson fortunately had a ton of experience building brands and has the networks that provide a voice for those brands. We tapped our friends at Juice Press, Bumble, Vice, Vogue, etc. [for help getting the word out].”

In addition, they decided that with every sale, they’d plant a tree to support their mission of saving the world through plants. “We hope to someday be responsible for planting more than 10 million trees,” says Kennedy. “We’re not too far off!”

The biggest hurdle: Product sourcing. “We don’t white-label anything,” Kennedy says, so being able to set up a really robust supply chain with partners operating with integrity was a challenge. He dealt with it by continuing to be curious and asking questions about everything from “how people are treating their employees to what their extracting methods look like and how they are capturing solvents,” he says. “We continually did research and didn’t say yes to the first people we came across.”

The other hurdle was payment processing. Like many startups in the industry, they had to get around the banks’ and financial firms’ reluctance to work with cannabis products. “We’ve had five credit card processors to date,” says Kennedy. “We’ve seen the worst -- 6 percent credit card fees, 10 percent rolling reserves, international declines -- and we’ve seen the best. We’re now with a standard processor that treats us as if we’re any other non-cannabis brand. We couldn’t be more grateful. And we’re in talks with one of the largest banks in the world about taking over our credit card processing. We never thought we’d be in such conversations.”

And the best lesson learned: “To make decisions and move forward has been such great learning,” says Kennedy. “You make a decision, and you do your best -- it may not be the most perfect decision, but it’s better than not making one at all. What I really learned about bootstrapping is that it’s just putting one foot in front of the other, and oftentimes it’s two steps forward and one and a half steps back--but I have to keep stepping forward.”

Image Credit: Bloomberg | Getty Images

Gofire

The founders: Peter Calfee and John Woodbine started Gofire with the goal of creating the perfect vaporizer -- one that delivers the exact dosage promised. But eventually, they grew the company to also include the Gofire Suite, a database of medical uses for cannabis broken down by the chemicals ingested, the time of day they should be consumed, and the dosage that’s most beneficial; the data can then be accessed by physicians to give patients.

How much they started with: $200.

What they did with it: Bribed a local college student to gain access to a 3-D printer at Calfee’s school, which they needed to create their prototype -- and then they used that to get a first round of funding.

RELATED: Yes, Medical Cannabis Works. So Why Deny the Anecdotal Evidence?

Their origin story: In 2014, Woodbine, who’d dabbled in the music and food businesses before working at a dispensary, approached Calfee, who was doing IT and alternative medicine consulting work, and tried to talk him into building the perfect vaporizer. Initially, Calfee wasn’t interested. But he eventually changed his mind when he realized that there was a market for a more perfectly attuned vaporizer and that his background in the health field could be a perfect fit.

The biggest hurdle: Right after the company raised its first $25,000 in a friends-and-family round, Calfee nearly died in a car crash when the person driving had a seizure. “That was when John and I came together and said, ‘Listen: Whatever this takes, whatever we have to go through to build this, we will achieve this,’” Calfee says. After that, there was a fire under them to get it done.

The accident effectively put the project on hold. But it also led to Gofire’s second product. While recovering from a broken back, Calfee discovered that the opioids he was being prescribed didn’t help as much as the cannabis he was consuming, which is when the idea for the database took root. As soon as he could, Calfee worked on their next round; it took a year, but they got $750,000 to help them grow the business. This year, they’re finally bringing it to market with a beta launch that has garnered tens of thousands of reviews. “There’s no better reward than a patient telling us how we’ve helped to improve their life,” he says.

And the best lesson learned: “There are always going to be obstacles, but they’re just that,” says Calfee. “You’ve got to find a way around [them] -- if it’s a physical ailment, if you break your back, or the bottom’s falling out in the economy, or whatever the situation you’re up against. I believe being a true entrepreneur is not taking no for an answer, and not being able to give up.”

Also this: Treat your team like your peers. “We have 25 employees,” Calfee says, “and we all own stock in the company.” Unsurprisingly, that gives each of them a drive Calfee couldn’t have necessarily found in salary-only employees. When Calfee calls for a possible meet-up in the office on a Sunday afternoon, often the reply is “‘Oh, I’m already here,’” he says. “You can’t buy that.”

via Entrepreneur.com - Startup Business News and Articles - Starting a Business http://bit.ly/2Z3xKmO August 13, 2019 at 10:48AM

#IFTTT #Feedly

1 note · View note

kylie-gets-fit · 6 years ago

Text

New Zealand

Five years ago, I had the chance of a lifetime that opened up a door to many more chances of a lifetime - interning at Disney. One of those chances was meeting my friend, Nola, a Tongan girl from New Zealand. We connected so well while in the states and I promised her one day I would go visit her in her country to experience her culture - well I keep my promises and it took your girl 5 years but I visited her! There were things I will never get to experience again, and sights I’d never get to see again. Let me tell you, it was a once in a lifetime experience - even if I get to go back.

I flew from Los Angeles to New Zealand on Fiji Airways, with a layover in Fiji. Apparently this is moreso of a budget airline for people in Oceania, but I was impressed. My first flight wasn’t the best as I was in a center seat and had an old man not only with his elbow in my seat, but also his foot under the seat in front of mine where my feet should be! After that rough 11 hour journey though, I had window seats for all remaining flights and the flights were so much better! There was music and movies available on the plane (I didn’t know this okay?) and the Fijian people were so nice.Even in the Fiji airport they all greeted me with “Bula!” which is their way of greeting people, much like the Hawaiian “Aloha”. While in that airport I met quite a few people from New Zealand and they were so nice and very helpful. My second flight was to New Zealand where I went through customs for the first time in my life. I don’t know why I was so nervous but it was pretty much a breeze. Just declare anything you have and go through the process.

I’ll discuss the food there since it was the first thing I noticed after leaving the airport - I felt like I hadn’t left America. McDonald’s, Wendy’s, KFC, Carl’s Jr., and soon to be Taco Bell everywhere! My struggle was finding gluten free meals - fries were a huge part of my diet! Nola’s family threw a barbecue and I was thinking since they are islanders there would be a roasted pig and lots of tropical fruit....burgers, wings, sausages, potato salad, and rolls! Their ice cream is so delicious though! I tried kiwi ice cream and it’s way better than it sounds. Their strawberry ice cream also has real strawberries.

One thing I didn’t mind there was how accessible the beach was. We went to three different beaches while I was there and each one was magical in it’s own way. The first beach we visited was Piha Beach and that was my favorite. Let me tell you, I will never see a place more magical. Our drive to the beach was long, and while everyone else was saying, “are we there yet?” I didn’t mind because the drive was gorgeous! There were so many trees and so much green and I don’t see that at home ever!

Once we got there, we parked the most beautiful, green forest and had a walk ahead. I couldn’t believe my eyes at how gorgeous this place was, and I hadn’t even seen half of it yet! Once we got to walking, not only did we get to enjoy the green view, but also a stream that I assumed led to the ocean. I wanted to get a photo in the water with the green in the background so I asked Nola to take a photo. The sand was black and the water was warm! Once we got to the beach, I knew I needed to take in every moment and every little bit that my eyes could see. The green grass and trees behind me, the black sand below me, the heavenly sky above me, and the powerful ocean in front of me. I will never see something that magical ever again and I will never forget!

There were many differences in New Zealand I picked up on that I wish we utilized here in the states. Without getting into politics, guns are outlawed there. I can tell you I always think about the chance of being caught up in a mass shooting in the States. While it is possible for someone to buy a gun black market there, I did not once feel worried while there. People don’t make big scenes there when they don’t get their way. And the most eye opening thing of all was how they take care of one another. We were in a drive thru and there was a man on the side begging for money. Her family began scrambling for coins and together we probably gave him about $5-8. We also went to a restaurant that had a cooler in the front with food in it. When we first walked in I assumed the food was for sale, but as we walked out I saw a sign that read “Free Food for People in Need, One Box Per Person Please”. I wish we had more of that here.

And of course, the reason I went there - to meet Nola’s family and learn about her culture, both Tongan and New Zealand. There were a couple things that I didn’t particularly agree with - like how women are required to keep their legs covered above the knee, but for the most part I saw the beauty in their culture.

They are very emotional people, and I wish that is something the American culture had. What first woke me up to this was visiting the cemetery (yep, we did that). Her family had recently lost her grandmother and unexpectedly, her cousin was violently killed. Instead of staying quiet, these people express what they are feeling - a lot. They talked about it so much, it would normally make me feel uncomfortable. But I realized something. They aren’t having meltdowns, they aren’t crying behind closed doors; wow, this is what it looks like to grieve death in a healthy way. We went to the cemetery after church on Sunday to visit them. How do they visit their deceased loved ones? They keep lawn chairs at their graves, pop down on a seat, and talk to them. About life, about everything. They even introduced me to them. You may think this is strange, but I found it beautiful. They weren’t the only people doing this either. There were people all around of all cultures in New Zealand doing this.

The Tongans are very formal in everything they do. They all get dressed up for church. I was lent a “kiekie”, somewhat like a woven grass skirt, to wear over my dresses for the week.For New Year’s I thought they had found a “kofu” or dress that happened to fit me, but it turned out that Nola’s aunt thought it would fit and said I could have it if it fit! We brought in 2019 in church. Church was spoken in Tongan, so I am not sure what they were saying. Once we left church, we went to Nola’s grandfather’s house where her whole family met to honor him. Everyone crammed into his small living room. At least it looked small with about 30 of us in there! Her grandfather, weak and brittle, started the discussion, getting very emotional. Then they all were speaking in Tongan taking turns to talk. Some were crying, some were laughing. I had no idea what was going on but just enjoying the fact that I got to witness this. The Nola’s sister Tina turned to me and said “would you like to say something?”. I was caught completely off guard. I can’t speak Tongan and had no clue what they were discussing. They all told me I could say anything I wanted regarding the new year. I improved some statement about how I was grateful for them allowing me to attend their family events and being able to bring in the new year learning about their culture. Then her grandfather spoke up. I could tell he was putting in all of his energy to look my way and speak, and he spoke English to me. He told me that he was glad to meet me and hopes to see me again. I fought tears. I had just met this man 10 minutes ago and I’m a no-one in this room of a family, yet he took the time to make me feel not only welcomed, but special.

Not only did I get to experience the Tongan culture, but I gained a family. Not only did I meet the relatives Nola lived with, but I met her extended family as well, as they are all very close. I met cousins on both sides of her family and bonded greatly! They are all funny and had great senses of humor. I asked what the term for white girl was and they told me it was “palagni” and that became my nickname. One night we were playing a game Nola’s sister Lote knew of called Psych, which is basically like Cards Against Humanity except you all get to create and vote for the answers and the subject is one of the players. Naturally they all were roasting each other and it was hilarious. But then they began roasting me. I didn’t even realize they knew me well enough to have anything on me! I said “Wow you guys don’t hold back!” and Tina said, “Yep, welcome to the family!” and we all laughed. At that moment I really did feel accepted and that I was a part of the family. Families aren’t always cordial, sometimes they insult each other, and I got to be included in that as well.

The goodbyes were also very formal. The night before I left, the entire family came into the living room for a family prayer. Her father said his prayer in Tongan and Nola explained that he said he was thankful that I was able to come and they could meet me and prayed for a safe trip back home. Everyone said something about my visit. He also said he was sorry if their home wasn’t nice but it was all they had. Let me tell you what they presented me with. They had a 3 bedroom home and Nola’s sisters were also there for summer break. That means there were 6 of them. THEY GAVE ME MY OWN ROOM. These people were so humble yet so grateful for what they had.Thank goodness I had written out a Thank You card and gotten them a basket of chocolates or I probably would have looked silly with how formal they made this. I really felt loved in this moment. They gave me a Tongan mat as a parting gift and I will treasure it forever. Tina said when people ask me about it I can say it’s from my Tongan side. It was a joke, but she somewhat mean it as well. I came to see Nola and learn about her culture, and I gained a family. Her parents wanted to take a family photo and luckily the instagrammer in the room brought her tripod! The next morning when I was leaving, her mother said her goodbyes and began crying. I met her a week ago. It was incredible how much I bonded with this family. SO MUCH LOVE.

#travel #newzealand #travelblog #lifestyle

2 notes · View notes

tiny-personal-university-thing · 7 years ago

Text

My {Formerly} Bad Student Story: Physical and Mental Health Almost Destroyed Me - But I’m Back and Better Than Ever

Please read if you have suffered from chronic illness/pain or with your mental health to the detriment of your education!

Where to begin?

To start, a little bit about me. I am 21 years old, and currently a junior in college at Texas Tech University. I was born and raised in Houston, Texas, but I currently go to school in Lubbock, Texas – 532 miles from where I grew up in Houston. I’m what my school calls a “University Studies” major, which means that my degree is comprised of three “disciplines.” Those include Women’s Studies, Legal Studies and Environmental Science. This is all in the hopes that I will make a well-rounded candidate for law school.

So this is where it gets interesting; this is the “{formerly}” bad student part. Basically, I didn’t do so hot my first two years at college. I suffer from chronic nerve pain due to 6 bulged discs because of a really bad car accident I had my senior year of high school - my truck was actually totaled. Additionally, I have this autoimmune disease called Hashimoto’s. It’s also called Chronic Lymphocytic Thyroiditis. It’s not fatal - it just sucks. In fact, it’s fairly common. My mom also has it. It’s just a major lifestyle change because my thyroid is either under-functioning or over-functioning. One of the most common symptoms across the board is debilitating fatigue. One may also experience copious hair loss (from it literally breaking off), hyperthyroidism/hypothyroidism, unexplained weight gain, depression/anxiety, joint stiffness, memory lapses, or complications such as heart disease. You can’t really be cured of Hashimoto’s, you just have to do your best to keep your life in a state of equilibrium. On top of all that, I was also officially diagnosed with an anxiety disorder (GAD), my freshman year of college; however, I have suffered from high-functioning anxiety since I was in the 2nd grade. I actually tested in the 98th percentile for anxiety. With my Hashimoto’s and chronic pain severely limiting my ability to even physically get out of bed, my grades really suffered. I was involved in a total of 8 organizations my first year of college, co-founder of two (one that focuses on raising awareness about sex trafficking that I am particularly proud of), and another that raises funds to establish legal aid clinics in less developed nations. I was also an officer in three of the aforementioned organizations, including the president of my dorm. But when I started to really get sick, participating in anything became so hard. I felt my peers judging me. I knew they didn’t believe me. My anxiety, which had been dormant for a couple years, came back with a vengeance. It almost destroyed me. I became isolated. I barely left my dorm - only to feed my horse each night or to buy food on campus. Every Friday, my mother would literally beg me to go out with friends, to reach out to literally anyone. I frequently considered the possibility of taking my own life - although I would describe it more along the lines of a general desire to cease existing, or to have never existed at all. I had never been so low in my entire life. My first semester, I did decently. I managed to go to the majority of my classes, and make decent grades that didn’t raise any red flags with my family or my school. While my social life did pick up my sophomore year and I began to form the close friendships we associate with college; unfortunately, I continued to regress academically in the semesters that followed.

But, enough about that. The fact that I was always in pain/tired to the point of delirium/constantly ill made it really hard for me to focus on school. Often, the pain or fatigue was so bad I couldn’t get out of bed. I couldn’t participate in the organizations I was excited about, ride my horse, play violin, or go to classes despite being eager to learn. When I did feel okay enough to go to class, I was bombarded by pervasive, irrational thoughts like “I’ve missed class for weeks, the professor/students are going to judge me when I show back up again tomorrow.” I just didn’t get it. I didn’t understand how I went from the girl who begged her mother to let her go to school when she was violently ill with the flu in 7th grade because I loved it so much, to the girl who hadn’t gone to class in so many days she lost count. I ended up having to take a semester off from school. I remained in the city where my college is and bided my time by working - serving and eventually bartending full time. While working 40+ hours per week, I also tried to find a good pain management doctor and a decent endocrinologist. By remaining in the city I went to college, I was able to maintain a facade that I was still in school. When anyone asked me about school, I kept my answers terse, and general. School was “good,” I was taking “some classes.”

When my semester off came to an end, I actually elected to take another semester off. I was torn in my decision to do this. I felt like I was letting everyone down a second time, that I would be stigmatized as a “drop out,” and I felt like no one believed me when I said I was going back. However, in my heart I still knew that I wasn’t in that much better of a place than I was when I left school. I am so glad I made that decision.

My second semester off, I found a good pain management doctor not far from where my mom lives. My insurance covered spinal injections frequently used to treat bulged discs, where I underwent general anesthesia and essentially my doctor went into the epidural space in my spine to administer steroids to the bulged discs that he believed to be causing my nerve pain. While these injections are temporary and I’ll have to go back and get more injections whenever the pain returns - they have brought me great relief. I continued working my job at the restaurant and became much more financially independent. This helped me to feel like less of a burden, and much more productive, in turn helping me with my anxiety. It also felt good having money. I was able to take over paying my rent, utilities, groceries, and costs associated with my horse. I also learned about Hashimoto’s, the symptoms (intolerable fatigue, insomnia despite said fatigue, gluten intolerance, inability to lose weight, my hair literally breaking off at alarming quantities, unbearable intolerance to the cold, inflamed joints, etc.) and how to live with it.

After that semester, I was ready and determined not to fail. As the Spring 2018 semester neared, I made an appointment to see an advisor at my university, who became one of the two advisors I saw about every 3 weeks. They knew all aspects of my life; my mental health, my physical health, my struggles with my job, my aspirations, everything. It was in meeting them that I realized my first year at Tech I made a huge mistake by only meeting with the advisor assigned to me when I had some sort of hold on my account - which was once a semester at best. My advisors have fervently supported me. I am so grateful to them for the resources and affirmation they have provided me with this semester. Additionally, I learned to be more honest about my struggles with the rest of my support system, including my family and friends. I kept the secret of my two semesters off from everyone I was related to except for my mom. Even my dad was unaware until my second semester off. I did this mostly out of shame, but now that I’m back on track I actually want to tell everyone my story. I also learned to be honest with myself about my genuine short comings that are unrelated to my health - including my organizational skills and time management skills. Lastly, I learned to be proud of myself, even for little victories.

This is now (as I am writing this) my first semester back at school in two semesters (not including the summer sessions). Again, I am actually genuinely proud of the work that I have put forward. I’m aspiring to make my school’s Dean’s List or President’s List every semester from now until I graduate (which, by the way, is still in 2019 - the same as it was when I first came to college, which just goes to show you that it’s okay to take time off from school if that’s what you need). I’m aspiring to graduate at least cum laude. I’m aspiring to receive at least a 172/180 on the Law School Admission Test, and I will get into law school. I know that I am capable of these things because of the time I took away from school to better myself. Finally, my hope is that other college students facing similar adversities will be able to resonate with me, realize that college is not a race (you are under no obligation to be out in exactly four years or less), and see that they absolutely can overcome their obstacles.

Finally, I am certain that my struggle is not rare. I know that some of you may struggle with anxiety or depression. I know that some of you may suffer from chronic illness or pain that peers your age cannot truly relate to. I know that some of you may fear disappointing your family. I would like to add that I am here for you. I can promise you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. If anyone - ANYONE - feels like they need someone to talk to, please feel free to reach out to me. I am up at all hours of the day and night usually. If you need just general advice, I got you. I hope that my story resonates with some of you.

My Story will be permanently linked to my blog via the “My Story” tab. As always, happy studying, fellow realistic students. And thank you again for 100+ followers. I am overwhelmed by your continued support.

166 notes · View notes

wolfjustdraws · 6 years ago

Text

Single Daddy Issues - Lockwood x Lucy 1

“1st Day at Kindergarten”- Lockwood x Lucy

Lockwood and Co. Series

Summary: Gotta like the teacher!

AU: SingleDaddyAU!

—————Lockwood—————

“You’ve got your lunchbox, dear?”

“Yes daddy”

“And your crayons?”

“Yes daddy”

“And you brought your blanky?”

“Yes daddy”

I drove down the highway stealing glances on my rearview mirror at the little girl that sat on my car’s backseat: my beautiful daughter, Juniper Lockwood.

Ever since I was in high school, I knew what I’d dedicate my life to; my father’s law firm. I had carefully planned my whole life so that I would get the best grades in high school, go to the best college in London, or if possible somewhere abroad, graduate with honors and start my professional career as the family’s business new boss.

My plans hadn’t fail me; I met all my expectations with ease and was soon appointed the CEO of Lockwood and Co., but, you know how people say that there’s our plans and life’s plans for us? And life always gets away with what it wants?

Well, that is exactly what happened to me: one moment my ex-girlfriend from college was at the door of my apartment, and the next moment I had my arms full with a one-year-old girl this woman claimed was mine. And according to the medical tests I took, she was mine.

This was a terrible turn of events for me. I suddenly had to provide for myself and a brat I did not wanted! That’s where my sister, Jessica, came up.

I told her what happened and she came to see me a week after the incident. She had been absolutely delighted to see how much resemblance there was between me and the girl, spent almost an hour cooing at the baby.

Jessica offered me an easy way out of the situation; she’d take the girl away and raise her as her own with her husband and her other kids. Little Juniper would never know she was mine: to her I’d only be uncle Anthony. I had been so tempted to say yes, but by then I had already spent a week tending to the little headache, and honestly, I had started to understand what parents felt like. The joy and pride they got from their children. I suddenly understood why my sister put up with her baby sons.

So, of course I rejected the offer, and promised myself and my baby girl I’d make it work, somehow, someway, even if I was a single dad. After all, money was not an issue.

Today, four years later, was her first day at kindergarten, and I was honestly more nervous than she was. The company had been growing lately and I’d been very busy overseeing all new changes, and even though Jessica was always happy to look after Juniper, I knew she’d have to go to school soon. Just, why so soon?

My deputy, Quill Kipps, suggested this little day care, Little Angel Childcare Center, where his son, Bobby, is currently attending. For what I understood, it was a small but very reputable kindergarten, with excellent reviews, numerous certifications and diplomas, and was actually close to my workplace, but that was as far as my knowledge went. Jessica had made me the favor of attending the school tour for parents and kids and taking the enrollment package, since, due to my overpacked schedule, I hadn’t been able to go. She assured me it was a fine school, but I needed to see this place for myself.

I pulled on the parking lot and took an eyeful of the place. It was a small building, walls painted with bright rainbows and clouds and smiling suns. The playground outside was spacious, with hard plastic houses, sand pits, slides and swing sets. Other cars were parked here as well, with mothers and fathers helping their children off the car and taking them to the building, some kids crying and some others happy.

I took a deep breath and walked out of the car, opening the backseat’s door to help my daughter off her baby seater.

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” I asked her one last time. Juniper looked at the building’s door where people entered and disappeared, then back at me with her big, brown eyes.

“Yes daddy”

“All right then, take my hand” The sight of unruly children was everywhere: running around the playground, the parking lot, the halls, crying or laughing, being pulled or chased by their annoyed parents. I made a mental reminder to praise Juniper later for being so well-behaved; cook her favorite dinner, and maybe watch a Disney movie with her before bedtime.

“Hey, Junie!” A woman greeted us as we walked down the hall. She was short, very short indeed, with brown hair, also cut short. She wore a sweater and a skirt over leggings, and a light yellow apron on top. Couldn’t be older than twenty “Welcome to your first day of class”

“Hi miss” Juniper shyly waved her tiny hand at her.

“You don’t have to greet the janitor, dear” I told my daughter. The woman raised an eyebrow and frowned, before grinning slyly at me.

“I am Juniper’s teacher” She said and pointed to the apron “This is just the uniform” Oh dear. My face heated up in embarrassment, but I decided to put it aside for appearance’s sake, so I raised my eyebrow at her.

“Who are you?”

“Name’s Lucy Carlyle. Very polite girl you’ve got here” She said as she ruffled Juniper’s freshly combed hair “You must be Anthony Lockwood, her dad. Though, you look kinda young to be a father”

And she looked much too young to be a fully licensed teacher, let me tell you!

“Yes, she is my daughter” I said putting my best business smile “Can I speak with the principal?”

“Headmistress Munro is not here right now” She said as she turned and guided us to the classroom, which’s floor was covered in colorful foam, with tiny table and chairs here and there. There were toys bins on one side of the room and bookshelves on the other, plus a TV on one of the walls “But I’m assuming there’ll be a few things you want to know before leaving Juniper in our care”

“Yes, are you a fully licensed teacher? Have you been trained in child psychology?”

“I’m majored in it” She said proudly “Mrs Jessica told us about your daughter, man, she’ll be okay here”

“What kind of snacks do you provide the kids with?”

“Biscuits, tea, milk, fruit, sometimes cake, and for those who stay in the afternoon hours, we give them a healthy meal at midday, its all supervised by the nutritionist” She listed off by memory and smiled “And, because I know you’ll ask, we do provide gluten-free options. But I see she brought her own lunch box”

“Daddy, can I play with the toys?” I heard Juniper ask quietly beside me.

“In a moment, darling” I pointed to the toy bins and eyed it suspiciously “How often are those cleaned?”

“We clean all the toys before morning starts, after class hours, during nap time and whenever any of them gets too dirty” Lucy took a doll from the bin my daughter her been eyeing and gave it to me so I could inspect it. I guess it was decent “She is your first child, isn’t she? That’s why you’re so, neurotic?” The teacher asked me with a smile.

I tried my best to look offended off my cavalries, but ended up sighing and racking a hand through my hair. My worries passed from leaving my daughter in this place to leaving my daughter with this careless woman. Why had Kipps suggested this place?

“I just want my daughter to be safe” I muttered. She rolled her eyes and shook her head, then patted my shoulder in empathetic manner.

“It alright, that’s what every parent wants, but you’re making this place look like some kind of horror movie orphanage, and I think you’re scaring her” I looked down to my little Juniper. She was wearing her Sleeping Beauty dress, her favorite Disney princess, with little dress shoes and pink socks. Her hand was still in mine, gripping it tightly in her own seek for comfort.

“Well, I’ll leave you to say your goodbyes, class will start in a few minutes” Lucy turned around and walked out of the room, calling for the kids to get inside.

I kneeled down on the foamed ground and cupped my daughter’s cheeks, her tiny hands coming to my hands.

“Daddy loves you, ok?” I said as reassuring as I could manage. June nodded her head firmly “If anything happens, if you’re not comfortable or if someone’s not being nice with you, just tell someone to call me and I’ll be here to pick you right away, alright?” Again she nodded her little head “Be nice”

“I will, daddy” I hugged her tightly and covered her forehead in kisses, making her giggle adorably. To pull away from the hug was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it eventually had to end. I stood my full height and turned to the teacher once again.

“I’ll leave you my number so you can call me if my daughter needs anything” I said, still in a business manner, but she still looked as cool as if she was at the beach. Goddamit, what do I have to do to make this woman to understand that my daughter was no joke?! “Give me your number as well”

“All right” Lucy took a piece of paper and wrote her number there, accepting the work card I gave her in which I wrote my number “Try calling at 10:00 or 12:00, that’s when we have playtime and lunch, and if you want to call during afternoon, I’d say you do between 3:00 and 4:00, we do arts and crafts then and play outside. I can’t assure you I’ll always be able to pick up, but if I don’t, just call the school”

“Well, if Juniper needs anything and I can’t pick up, just call Lockwood and Co.; my secretary will get me”

“Oh, you’re a lawyer?” Now, this information usually worked when you wanted to make someone respect you or fear you, and that was what I wanted; for her to understand that I was not all smiles and jokes when it came to my daughter. However, she didn’t seem the slightly bit affected by that knowledge, and only smiled again “That’s great! Well, I’d love to keep chatting, but class is in session, so I have to ask you to leave”

With one last glance at my baby girl playing sitting with her blanky on her lap, I walked out of the classroom. Once I was back in my car, I sighed worriedly and allowed myself to cry a little. Only a little.

#lockwood and co #Anthony lockwood #lucy carlyle #george cubbins #holly munro #quill kipps #flo bones #kate godwin #bobby vernon #Lucy x lockwood #lockwood x lucy #locklyle #lucewood

24 notes · View notes

consulting-celiac-in-the-tardis · 6 years ago

Text

41 Gluten Free Party Food Recipes for the Holidays

New blog post! If there's one thing five years of being diagnosed with celiac disease and eating gluten free has taught me, it's that you can have just as delicious a holiday season as everyone else! The catch? You need to know the right gluten free recipes!

That's why, this year, I thought I'd kick off the holiday season with a round-up of some of my favorite gluten free party food recipes from around the blogosphere. This post is full of gluten free appetizer ideas, gluten free snacks and gluten free desserts - basically, everything you need to have an epic holiday gettogether, whether you bring one of these appetizers to Thanksgiving dinner or save them for a New Year's Eve party. So enough of my talking...let's dive into the food! Without further adieu, here are 41 gluten free party food recipes that can make the 2018 holiday season extra special (and delicious)!

1. Cajun Shrimp and Corn Dip With Cream Cheese - A Sprinkling of Cayenne

Talk about a delicious way to spice up your usual holiday eats!

2. Creamy White Bean Beet Hummus (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac

If you need a gluten free and vegan dip that's as colorful as it is tasty, look no further than my white bean beet hummus! You only need five ingredients (including water) to make it, and it tastes delicious on everything from chips to veggies to potatoes.

3. Pumpkin Spice Fruit Dip (Dairy Free, Egg Free, Refined Sugar Free) - Raia's Recipes

Fruit just got an upgrade with this pumpkin-spiced dip!

4. Spicy Ranch and Broccoli Stuffed Mushrooms - Family Food and Travel

Even convert veggie haters won't be able to resist this gluten free appetizer...

5. Spiced Apple Cider Made from Apple Juice - Faithfully Gluten Free

Because no party is complete without some delicious drinks!

6. Nut-Free Bone Broth Pesto (Paleo) - Casey the College Celiac

Sneak some extra protein and nutrients into your party food with my bone broth pesto! Trust me. This pesto is soooo flavorful, no one will ever know you swapped bone broth for the traditional oil...

7. Vegan Paleo Pecan Pie Bars - Allergy Free Alaska

I don't know what kind of witchcraft was used to make this dessert vegan and paleo, but I'm excited to bring that same magic to my own kitchen ASAP!

8. Gluten Free Chips and Guacamole Bites - My Gluten-Free Kitchen

Whether you're throwing a casual Friendsgiving or going to a fancy dinner party, you can't go wrong with chips and guac....

9. Cranberry Salsa (Vegan) - The Welcoming Table

Who knew that salsa could be so festive?!? Plus, this gluten free appetizer only takes five minutes to make!

10. Pumpkin Cheesecake Bites - The Happy Housewife

Excuse me while I lick my computer screen and swoon...

11. Pepperoni Pizza Dip - Baking Beauty

As always, make sure you use all gluten free ingredients, like with the pizza sauce and pepperoni. Then all you have to do is watch as people start raving over this gluten free appetizer!

12. Easy Caprese Salad Skewers with Balsamic Glaze - Zesty Olive

Like the saying goes, "If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it!" This classic is as good as it gets.

13. Chewy Pumpkin Popcorn Balls (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac

Love pumpkin? Love popcorn? Love bite-size, delicious desserts? Then prepare to fall head over heels for these pumpkin popcorn balls!

14. Olive Tapenade (Vegan, Soy Free, Nut Free) - Fried Dandelions

Pair it with some gluten free crackers, toast or even pasta, and this olive tapenade spread will create one heck of a tasty snack.

15. Mini Pear, Pecan and Goat Cheese Appetizers - The Foodie and the Fix

Combine pears, pecans, goat cheese, sage and honey, and you're basically guaranteed one heck of a tasty appetizer.

16. Smokey Chipotle Pumpkin Hummus (Vegan) - Pink Fortitude

Is there anything more perfect for fall than PUMPKIN hummus?!? I think not...

17. Superfood Chocolate Banana Brownies (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac

A cross between brownies and banana bread, this gluten free dessert will be a hit with any and all of your party guests!

18. Crispy Air Fryer Chicken Wings with Parmesan (Low Carb, Keto) - Recipes From a Pantry

Who says you can't eat fried chicken as part of a healthy, gluten free diet?

19. Keto Cheese Dip For Low Carb Vegetables and Chips - Low Carb Yum

The Christmas colors of this keto cheese dip make it a winning appetizer for any holiday party this year!

20. Healthy Cranberry Wassail Recipe (Sugar Free) - Healthy Christian Home

Apple juice, orange juice, lemon juice, cranberries and spices combine in this flavorful holiday drink.

21. Convenient Bacon Wrapped Asparagus Bites With Cream Cheese (Keto, Low Carb) - Savory Tooth

This appetizer only takes five ingredients to make, and it's a super tasty way to sneak some veggies into your holiday party!

22. Vegan Cake Batter Dip (Sugar Free, Oil Free, Keto, Low Carb) - VegAnnie

Cake batter...in dip form...that's also gluten free and vegan!?! Serve with some gluten free cookies or fruit, and I'm sure this dip will disappear fast!

23. Gluten Free Pizza Quesadilla - The Helpful GF

Whether you need a gluten free snack for kids (or kids at heart), this quesadilla is a winning choice.

24. 5-Minute Avocado Ranch Dip with Greek Yogurt - Two Healthy Kitchens

Who knew that avocado could get 100000X times better combined with Greek yogurt, vinegar and spices?

25. Flourless Rocky Road Chocolate Cookies - Foodal

Gooey chocolate cookies...with chewy marshmallows...and crunchy walnuts? SIGN ME UP!

26. Secretly Veggie-Packed Vegan Cheese Sauce - Casey the College Celiac

Nowadays, I always have some of this homemade vegan cheese sauce hiding in my fridge because it's just that addictive. Use it as a dip for chips, as a drizzle for veggies or even as a sauce for a big pot of vegan mac and cheese for all your party goers to share.

27. Crispy Roasted Rosemary Potatoes (Vegan) - Sweet and Savory Meals

Crisp on the outside and fluffy on the inside? My kind of potato heaven...

28. Flourless Mocha Brownie Bites - The Monday Box

Excuse me as I swoon over that chewy, fudgy bite!

29. Party Cheese Ball with Goat Cheese and Almonds - The Anthony Kitchen

If you and your guests can eat dairy, you can't go wrong with a flavorful and festive cheeseball.

30. Gluten Free Intensely Chocolate Cookies - Tikkido

Only six ingredients stand between you and diving into this deliciously chocolatey dessert.

31. Cream Cheese Stuffed Dates with Walnuts - Oh, The Things We'll Make

If you need a gluten free appetizer by, like, yesterday, this three-ingredient appetizer is exactly what you're looking for.

32. Crunchy Caramel Apple Energy Balls (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac

Out of all the gluten free snacks for kids I've shared on my blog's recipe page, this one is perfect for a fall get-together. And I promise. The combination of sticky dates, crunchy pumpkin seeds and sweet applesauce makes this one healthy dessert everyone will love!

33. Autumn Salad with Butternut Squash, Apples, Cranberries & Candied Pecans (Vegetarian) - The Rising Spoon

If there's another salad recipe that's more perfect for fall than this one, I've never seen it. And I wouldn't be surprised if guests just start eating the candied pecans from the salad...so definitely make extra for them (or you!).

34. Keto Taco Stuffed Mini Peppers - Beauty and the Foodie

Make sure you use a gluten free taco seasoning to whip up this flavor-packed gluten free appetizer.

35. Ginger and Pear Polenta Cake - Veggie Desserts

Who knew that pears and polenta would be the secret to one insanely delicious gluten free cake?!?

36. Healthy Tzatziki Sauce - Attainable Sustainable

Slather this sauce on veggies, gluten free bread or tortillas or anything else your heart (or stomach) desires...

37. Vegan Chickpea Squash Fritters - Piping Pot Curry

...including these vibrant chickpea squash fritters, which are another tasty way to sneak extra veggies into your holiday eats!

38. White Chocolate Dipped Pistachio Cookies - Brooklyn Farm Girl

I'm a sucker for pistachios, so you can bet that these cookies are on my to-do list this year!

39. Kale Guacamole - Savory Lotus

Because sometimes even guac needs a facelift.

40. Mozzarella Sticks (Vegan) - Pink Fortitude

Mozzarella sticks that are also gluten free and vegan? You know I'd be digging in...

41. Candied Pecans - Salt and Baker

If you need a gluten free dessert that's as simple as it is scrumptious, these candied pecans are exactly what you need! Just make sure you use gluten free (and non-cross-contaminated) nuts.

The Bottom Line of Gluten Free Party Food and Having an Awesome Gluten Free Holiday Season

I know from experience that for people with celiac disease, food allergies or dietary restrictions, the holiday season can be, well, awkward. A lot of times, holidays are full of parties and dinners where you don't have anything to eat. And sometimes, that can make you feel like the odd one of out. That's why, this year, I'm challenging YOU (and myself!) to make your holiday season extra tasty, whether it's your first year eating gluten free during the holidays or your twentieth. Try out a new gluten free snack recipe. Bring a gluten free appetizer to a party and watch people's minds get toootally blown by how good gluten free food can be! Heck, you could even throw your own 100% gluten free holiday party. There are plenty of delicious, gluten free possibilities for the next few months! Whatever way you decide to celebrate the holidays this year, I hope that these gluten free party food recipes give you some new ideas for how to spice up your daily eats. And if one of these recipes becomes a new family favorite...well, consider that your Christmas present from me. What gluten free appetizer or snack from this list is calling your name? Tell me in the comments! via Blogger https://ift.tt/2FkeJ6Y

#Blogger #college #celiac #gluten free #coeliac #celiacs #paleo #primal #foodporn #foodart

1 note · View note

mangohealth · 6 years ago

Text

My 13 Favorite Low-Carb Foods (and 3 to Avoid)

Finding low-carb foods that actually taste good and aren’t chock full of fake, chemical-laden ingredients is a tough pursuit—one I’ve been on since I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes nearly twenty years ago. But I never gave up! And now I’m going to share a few of my favorite products and recipes that will help you keep your carb intake low, keep your tastebuds happy, and fill your body with mostly whole, real delicious food!

Soft & Fluffy Bread Rolls from The Diet Doctor (recipe)

These are a staple in my house. I eat two or to three small rolls every day and let me tell you, not only do I not need insulin for them (unless I melt some chocolate chips on top in the microwave), they also make your digestive tract sing thanks to all that fiber. While you may have to do a little shopping around to get the right ingredients (I highly recommend ordering Anthony’s almond flour and psyllium husk on Amazon for a good price), once you make them the first time, they become really easy. I make a double batch every few weeks and store them in the fridge and freezer so I can eat them every day!

Edamame Fettuccine Pasta from Seapoint Farms (product)

I’ve tried a lot of low-carb pastas. And there are a few good ones out there, but...this one is the best. First of all, you could eat half the box and only consume 22 grams of non-starchy carbs after subtracting the dietary fiber. The texture, the taste, the fact that you can’t over-cook it and accidentally turn it into mush—it’s just so good. Even my stubborn father-in-law ate it and loved it! Honestly, I won’t bother buying any of my former low-carb pasta choices because this one is so exceptional.

Edible Cookie Dough from Lions Pack (product)

This peanut butter based “dough” is scary delicious. And sure, if you eat the whole jar, the carb count isn’t low anymore, but if you keep this tucked in the fridge for a spoonful (or two) after dinner each night as your “dessert,” the carb content is wonderfully low for something that tastes like a strawberry poptart or a s’more or a cinnamon roll or...Oreos!! Every flavor is gluten-free and vegan, and the flavor options are endless. It’s not cheap, but if it helps you stay on track and avoid the real Oreos, it might become a worthwhile staple in your home.

Bread, Bagels and More...from The Great Low-Carb Bread Company (product)

I love everything this company makes, but am especially impressed by the bagels -- which even my husband liked. Their breads are soft, fluffy, and look and taste like bread. Their low-carb recipe secrets focus primarily on a highly effective combination of oat fiber, almond flour, flax meal, and stevia. Did I mention many of their products are also gluten-free? Their hamburger buns and pastas won’t take away from enjoying those classic meals. They even have low-carb soft-pretzels. You’ve gotta check these out. Delicious, I promise!

Discover Chocolate from Discover Confectionery (product)

Oh, this stuff is good. Many of their flavors are deliciously unique (probably because this is a UK-based product), and it tastes and feels and looks like real chocolate! An entire bar will deliver about 13 grams of low-impact carbs, and is filled with real food ingredients--not chemicals and fake junk. The only flaw of this product is the price.

Flaxseed Muffin in a Mug from a variety of sources (recipe)

This muffin is one of my morning go-to recipes. It takes less than 5 minutes to make a single serving. It’s full of real ingredients, super healthy fats, lots of fiber, and sometimes...chocolate chips! Mix ingredients in a dry coffee mug. Microwave for 70 seconds. Pop it out onto a plate. Cut into 3 slices and add a little butter or...whatever! My favorite version of this includes a tablespoon of chocolate chips to get my chocolate fix without breaking the “carb bank.”

Quest Protein Bars from Quest Nutrition (product)

While I wouldn’t want to encourage using protein bars as a meal replacement (‘cause let’s be honest, they are definitely not made of “whole” food ingredients), these are a great go-to if you’re trying to avoid real desserts, or when you need on-the-go “Oh, my gosh, I’m starving” kind of food from the bottom of your bag. They come in a billion flavors, including birthday cake, cookies ‘n cream, and cinnamon roll. After subtracting the fiber, the remaining carbs are pretty low-impact, and they’re plenty satisfying.

Spiralized Veggies from a variety of sources (product)

Even if you don’t have the “as seen on TV” veggie spiralizer, you can buy pre-spiralized zucchini and carrots to make a your own low-carb “pasta.” (Yes, carrots contain some carbs, but hose carbs are coming from a source that’s a whole food, high in fiber, and packed with essential vitamins.) You can find them in the fresh produce aisle at your grocery store, or in the freezer section at Trader Joe’s, along with frozen cauliflower rice. Simply throw them in a large saute pan with a little oil, add some herbs or sauce, and you have a low-carb and super healthy “pasta” dish.

Really, Really Easy Breadsticks from Kirbies Cravings (recipe)

Ditch the starchy breadsticks and even the pizza crust and make this effortless zero-carb flatbread instead. Literally, you just toss eggs, cheese and herbs into a food processor. Zap zap zap. Pour that batter onto parchment paper in a cookie pan. Bake. Voila!

Chia Seeds from a variety of sources (product)

Chia seeds are definitely trendy these days, but for a good reason: you can make delicious breakfast or dessert pudding with this little seed from Mexico. Soak in just a couple tablespoons overnight in your milk of choice (low-carb milks like coconut or almond would be ideal), and by morning you’ll find you have a thick cup full of chia seed pudding that only contains about 1 gram of carb after subtracting the fiber. You can make it sweeter with your preferred alternative sweetener, or jazz it up with a little peanut butter and a tablespoon of real chocolate chips. Checkout more easy recipe ideas from GnomGnom.

Zucchini Pizza Bites from LowCarbYum (recipe)

Honestly, you don’t even need to know how to read to make these. It’s so easy, and so customizable, too! Chop zucchini into medium-thickness slices and top with a little pasta sauce (check your label closely to avoid buying a high-sugar sauce), a little cheese and 1 slice of pepperoni per slice of zucchini. Pop them in the oven until the cheese is fully melted—delicious low-carb pizza night. Kids will like them. Picky husbands who don’t care about their carb intake will like them. I haven’t offered them to my father-in-law yet, but I bet he might even enjoy them, too!

Romaine Lettuce! No...seriously! Swap it for all bread....

The easiest way to cut the processed, starchy carbs from a sandwich or tacos or even a hamburger is to simply keep a giant stash of romaine lettuce in your fridge at all times. Lay strips of bacon with chopped tomatoes and mayo on romaine for a low-carb BLT. Ditch those corn-laden taco shells and turn Mexican night into a fresh crunchy salad by filling a bowl with fresh crunchy romaine lettuce. Add a little salsa, a little hot sauce, maybe a little more cheese...taco night never tasted so good! (And did you know, romaine lettuce is just as loaded with awesome nutrients as spinach and kale? )

3 “LOW CARB” FOODS TO AVOID

Shirataki Noodles

Okay, some people must love these, but I’m not one of those people. While they don’t contain carbs, these “noodles” are also void of basically any nutrition whatsoever and come in smelly liquid with an unpleasant taste that takes a lot of rinsing and a lot of sauce to cover up. They also have a texture that makes me feel like I might be accidentally chewing on someone’s ear cartilage. If you’ve never tired, you should...at least once. But don’t surprised if you find yourself needing to make something else for dinner after the first bite.

Julian’s Bakery Breads from Julians Bakery (product)

These seem like a dream come true...before you’ve actually tasted them. I’m sorry to say that these extremely low-carb bread varieties are not only not tasty but even hard to even swallow. I choked on the first bite, to be honest. They are dry, weirdly textured, and void of any real flavor (at least a flavor you’d enjoy eating). There must be diehard fans out there, because this company has been around for a while...but I’ve never met them.

Diet Soda

Many people will disagree with me on this one, but at least hear me out. A diet soda here and there--let’s say, once a week--is no big deal. But if diet soda has become your go-to source of hydration every day of the week, not only are you consuming a heck of a lot of chemicals, you’re also only going to make your sweet tooth crave more and more sweet things. When I finally quit drinking diet soda, things with no sugar in them at all started tasting deliciously sweet--like flavored seltzer with a dash of apple cider vinegar. There’s also a great deal of conflicting research on the safety of many artificial sweeteners, and on whether or not they may be increasing a person’s insulin resistance, because their bodies to need more insulin, not less.

About the author:

Ginger Vieira has lived with Type 1 diabetes and Celiac disease since 1999, and fibromyalgia since 2014. She is the author of Pregnancy with Type 1 Diabetes, Dealing with Diabetes Burnout, Emotional Eating with Diabetes, and Your Diabetes Science Experiment. Her background includes a B.S. in professional writing, certifications in cognitive coaching, Ashtanga yoga, and personal training, with several records in drug-free powerlifting. She lives in Vermont with her husband, their two daughters, and their dog, Pedro.

If you liked this post, you may also like:

• 5 Healthy Kitchen Shortcuts You Need to Know

• Diagnosis: New Diabetes Doctor Needed

• The Beginner’s Commercial Break Workout

The posts on this blog are for information only. They are neither intended to substitute for a relationship with your doctor or other healthcare provider, nor do they constitute medical or healthcare advice of any kind. Any information in these posts should not be acted upon without consideration of primary source material and professional input from one’s own healthcare providers.

#lowcarb #diabetes #type 1 diabetes #type1 #healthysnacks #healthysnack #lowcarbliving #dietadvice #insulin #chronicillness #digitalhealth

3 notes · View notes

marilynlamantia · 3 years ago

Text

Most Powerful Method:-- How to lose weight on a budget in 7 simple steps

How to lose weight on a budget is what it literally means, what it means- how to make lemonade out of lemons. It doesn’t matter why you have chosen to eat clean on a budget and lose weight, what matters is that you’ve decided that no matter what, you are going to shed off the extra pounds. I applaud you for that because so many people wait for the perfect conditions when in fact you can achieve anything that you want if you really want it.

As you may be aware, weight loss is 80% nutrition and 20% exercise’ and what and how much you eat is way more important than the hours you’ll spend on a treadmill try to ‘out-exercise a bad diet.’ Working out for an hour is easy, what is hard is what you do during the other 23 hours that you have to nourish your body with the right food. Essential reading: How to eat clean on a budget and lose weight

You will realize that it is even harder when you are trying to lose weight on a tight budget. This is because of the misconception that to eat clean, you have to buy into the ridiculously overpriced ‘healthy foods.’ I won’t get into what I think about some of these ‘healthy or organic foods’ but what I will tell you right now and probably the most important thing that you can take away from this article is this:

The fastest and best way to lose weight is really not about you eating organic this and that, or gluten-free this, and gluten-free that. Calories are calories where your chicken is organic or not or whether your bread is gluten-free or not. The fact that most healthy foods are way more expensive than junk food shouldn’t be a stumbling block to meeting your goals in your weight loss journey. Unless you have a medical condition that makes it impossible to lose weight, there really shouldn’t be a reason why you shouldn’t lose weight even when you can’t afford the healthiest meals. As long as your food isn’t overly processed or refined, you can eat clean on a budget and lose massive weight without spending thousands of dollars on food. Here is how you can lose weight on a budget How to lose weight on a budget in 7 simple steps

1. Plan and prepare your meals in advance Have you heard about this wonderful thing called meal planning? Meal planning is when you plan and prepare your meals in advance and is the best tip if you want to lose weight on a budget and busy schedule. You can plan and prepare your meals for as long as you wish and as long as your freezer can handle the quantity. Depending on your schedule, you can prepare meals a week, 3 days, or even 2 weeks in advance. It’s all up to you. I prefer planning my meals a week in advance usually on Sundays. A week out is the perfect balance to maintain some form of freshness especially when it comes to food like chicken breast, which seems to dry up pretty fast, in my opinion. Your life will be much more simplified when you don’t have to think and worry about what you’ll eat when you get off from work. For 7 days a week, your breakfast, lunch, dinner, and in-between snacks will all be sorted out. The awesome thing about meal planning is that it’ll also help you to stick to your planned healthy meals. When you don’t have a plan for what you are going to eat on a particular day or time, it’s easy to dive into whatever is sitting in front of you. Meal planning will also help you put a stop to mindless snacking.

2. Do your grocery shopping in bulk to save money Planning meals in advance will become easier once you start buying your groceries in bulk. What you should do here is write down your grocery list for the month, fortnight or week, and then plan your meals for the week around the list. Once you know exactly what you are going to need to prepare your meals, only then should you go out to the store, and do your shopping. When at the store, be strict and stick to only, and only, what is on that list, no negotiations. This is how you are going to lose weight on a budget effortlessly.

3. Cook your own meals Yes, Suzy, it’s time to learn how to cook! Eating out or ordering in when you are trying to lose weight on a budget must be out of the question. If you don’t know how to cook, this is the perfect time to learn basic cooking. The internet today is full of quick and easy healthy meals that you can prepare without much effort. I am not qualified to dispense financial advice but will say this: if you are looking up how to lose weight on a budget, dining out should be a huge NO-NO until your finances are in better shape. Buying a ‘healthy’ sandwich here and there may seem like a great idea to eating clean when you are on the run, but those small amounts of money spent on sandwiches and smoothies will eventually add up. Something you should always remember while you try to eat clean on a budget and lose weight is that you do not have to learn how to cook world-class meals.

Your life is not MasterChef, and neither are you in competition with anybody. You can find easy healthy recipes for weight loss on a budget to help you cook sumptuous meals in a flash. One of the cookbooks that I love is meal prep: the complete meal prep cookbook for beginners. It promises delicious but simple healthy meals for weight loss and delivers on it. If you can afford to buy this book right now, then I would advise you to get it, but if you can’t, make Pinterest and the internet your true love. 4. Track the calories Again, I’ll sing this song- eating clean and losing weight have got nothing to do with eating organic foods or any fancy diet that might pop up every now and then. The amount of calories that you consume versus the amount that you expend determines whether you gain, maintain or lose weight. That simple. For example, if your maintenance calories (the calories you need to maintain your body weight) are 2000, you should subtract about 200 to 500 calories to arrive at the number of calories you should be consuming to lose weight. To understand this better, there are free tools such as MyFitnessPal that will hold your hand while you learn how to track and calculate the calories that you burn, as well as consume.

5. Drink like a fish

You have to literally drink water like a fish because not only is it free in most cases, but it’ll help you stay hydrated and lose weight. You have to chuck out that bottle of wine for a while because alcohol can dehydrate you and also lead to weight gain. Water is life as they say, and when it comes to losing weight, water is, the life that weight loss depends on. Apart from revving up your metabolism, water can also help you curb hunger as well as help your body get rid of waste. The study also shows that drinking water before meals helps to suppress appetite.

6. Stock up on frozen fruits and canned vegetables When your finances are tight, canned and frozen foods that include macronutrients are a lifesaver. Your freezer, on the other hand, should be stocked with bags of frozen vegetables You should have on hand, these foods in your pantry and home even if you are not trying to lose weight on a budget. • Canned tuna in water – cheap source of protein • Kidney beans – look for the option that is low on sugar and sodium • Lentils – dry or canned • Chickpeas and peas • Oats – stay away from instant oats, they are highly processed and contain too much sugar (I love this overnight oats recipe with chia) • Sweet potatoes • Brown rice • Frozen vegetables like green beans, cauliflower, broccoli, and butternut squash • Chilli peppers to rev up your metabolism • Greek yogurt or plain yogurt • Frozen fruit • Grapefruit • Eggs • Apples • Kale and spinach • Avocado, when in season • Chicken breasts • Canned fruit in water and not syrup 6. Workout at home if you can’t afford a gym membership

If you can’t afford it, there’s no reason for you to sign up for a gym membership to keep fit and lose weight. There are many ways of exercising, such as running outdoors and at-home workouts for beginners, and the best part is they are either free or cost next to nothing. Running outside your neighborhood, or taking part in Parkruns is absolutely free. I recently joined my local Parkrun and I love it

If you are a beginner, you can start by walking outside your home at least 3 times a week for 20 minutes, until you are fit enough to throw in a little jogging here and there, or run the entire distance. At-home workouts to lose weight If you would rather workout at home, these are some of the best inexpensive weight loss workout programs that you can start with: My final thoughts on how to lose weight on a budget

Lastly, I’ll say this to you from the bottom of my heart. As someone who had to survive on a shoestring budget on several occasions and also lost weight, my advice to you is this: Losing weight is not easy, no matter what anybody tells you. Don’t ever be too harsh on yourself. Don’t pit yourself against others who are on an entirely different weight loss journey from yours. You have no idea what goes on behind the closed doors of most fitness models that you might be looking up to for motivation. There’s a lot of ‘behind the scenes’ struggles between all the incredible weight loss success stories, and the before and after photos that we often see on social media. Be true to yourself, to your WHY, to your finances, and to your personal story. As you try to eat clean on a budget and lose weight, you might, and will fail along the way. The secret to successful weight loss is to get up and start again each time you fail. Don’t stay down for longer than 5 days.

Find the strength within you to stay consistent, and keep going no matter what! Don’t give up on your weight loss goals. Yes, you will be discouraged time and again, especially when results seem slow. Just never ever quit. I have struggled with weight since 2005 when I had my first child and I know how it is like. Keep going until you reach your goal

0 notes