#it’s been so effective that I’m also desensitized

[meltedmush]

tbh binghorse has been on my tl so much it doesn't even faze me anymore. nor any of the skin creatures really. kinda feels like you've made me immune to the horrors? thanks I suppose 😭

BWAHAHA MY PLAN IS COMING TO FRUITION (you’re welcome~! 🫶💖)

[meraus]

One day I will discover the elusive modern horror

[lycandrophile]

it's silly but the biggest reason why im not into t yet is bc im so afraid of losing my hair. do you have any solutions/tips for it?

first of all, i don’t think it’s silly — it’s natural to be worried when hair loss is talked about by so many people as like…one of the worst results of aging for men. listening to my dad talk about how much he hates balding definitely did not make me feel particularly good about the knowledge that i may very well be joining him someday. i’m not saying the fear is right, because i don’t think hair loss is something awful that we should avoid at all costs, but it’s an understandable fear given the beauty standards we’re working with, and it’s one that a lot of us (myself included) feel.

one thing that’s helped me is just…paying more attention to the guys that i interact with on a daily basis. i’ve learned two things from it: 1) hair loss is super fucking common. i’d say it’s much harder to find an adult man who isn’t balding at all than it is to find one who’s completely bald. and 2) if you forget everything you’ve been told about how bad hair loss is, you’ll realize that quite frankly, every single one of those guys looks totally fucking fine. it doesn’t ruin their appearance and make them ugly, it looks totally natural and isn’t really even something you’d notice if you weren’t looking for it. we put so much weight on it but it’s really just not that big of a deal. i’ll hear my parents talk shit about men in my family who are losing their hair when i didn’t even notice a difference last time i saw them. it’s one of those things (like so many other appearance-related things) that you really only notice at all because you’ve been taught that you’re supposed to care about it.

this isn’t something i’ve done personally, but if you really want to desensitize yourself to the idea of it, embrace the time-honored queer tradition of just shaving your whole damn head! find out what you’d look like without hair, find out how you feel about it and what you can do that makes you feel good about your appearance without hair, test the waters while it’s still a temporary change and not something permanent. that way, it won’t feel like this big scary unknown, and you’ll actually have a frame of reference for your feelings about how you look without hair rather than accepting the societal assumption that you’ll inevitably hate it. if you don’t want to actually shave your head, you could also just fuck around with bald filters or photoshop and see what happens.

oh, and if you’re attracted to men, keep an eye out for guys who are bald or balding and also hot as fuck. in my experience, there’s no insecurity or potential future insecurity that being gay for other men hasn’t helped me with. just off the top of my head, i can think of a couple actors who i think are absolutely fucking gorgeous who have helped me get over my fears about losing my hair. despite what our anti-aging-obsessed world might want you to think, there is no such thing as a physical feature that automatically makes someone less attractive, and while making attractiveness less of a priority in your life is good, it can’t hurt to also give yourself some proof that actually, you might lose your hair and look hot as hell doing it.

basically, entertain the possibility that it won’t be a bad thing at all! whether that’s just because it turns out to be a neutral thing for you or because you end up actually liking it, it’s not an inherently bad thing. i’ve ended up liking a lot of things that were “supposed to” be bad effects of t — i love the weight i’ve gained and the new shape it gives my body, i get a lot of gender euphoria from the fact that my acne is now on parts of my face that i saw a lot of guys in high school get it and i’m not complaining about the scars i get from it either because i’ve always liked the added texture that acne scars give my skin, and so on. i think there’s a lot of joy to be had in the changes we’re taught to fear, once we look past that conditioning and actually explore how we feel about it.

but if it’s something you really don’t want and you just want to improve your chances of not having to deal with it, it’s not like there’s nothing you can do! products like finasteride (oral) and minoxidil (usually topical but i think there might also be oral versions) are pretty commonly used among trans guys, for the purpose of avoiding hair loss and for other reasons, and there are plenty of other anti-hair loss products out there (though i don’t know how effective any one of them might be). if it’s a big enough deal for you, you can just decide that you’ll go off of t if/when you start noticing signs of it, since no longer having higher t levels would stop the process in its tracks. and if you don’t find prevention options that work for you so it ends up happening, you can always explore different hair styles (judging by the pattern of hair loss i see in my family, i suspect that keeping my hair long would make it less obvious if i started losing mine), find your preferred method of covering it when you don’t feel good about it (personally i love a good beanie generally and would probably wear them a lot more if i didn’t have hair to worry about because my main complaint is the way they press my hair onto my neck), or just shave it all off if you don’t like the look of the partial balding but don’t mind a shaved head. the point being — you have options!

at the end of the day, whether you go on t or not, you’re going to see your body change as you age in ways that aren’t always going to be attractive to others or aesthetically pleasing to you. that’s just the reality of having a body. even if you never went on t, you’d get older and you might see your hair thin out even if you don’t bald, you’ll see your skin start to wrinkle and sag in places that used to be smooth, your metabolism might slow or your body fat might start to gather in new places; hell, you might lose your hair for a totally different reason and end up in the same place but without the benefits of having been on t that whole time. life is full of bodily changes like that. transphobes will fearmonger about the permanent changes of testosterone all day long but the truth is, there is no escaping permanent bodily changes. whether or not you go on t, your body now isn’t the same as it will be in 1 or 5 or 10 or 20 or 50 years, just like it isn’t the same as it was at any point in your life before now. our bodies are never supposed to stop growing and aging and changing throughout our lives. there’s no guaranteeing that we’ll love every single change our bodies go through, but that’s okay! there are so many things in life that are more important than the way our bodies look. even if you go on t and lose your hair and don’t like how it looks, your life won’t be ruined; plenty of other things will bring you joy and more than make up for the insecurities.

just think about the gender euphoria and relief from dysphoria that t could give you. would losing your hair be bad enough to outweigh all of that? or is it just the pressure of a society that decided balding is bad that’s making you fear one single change despite how much joy you could have if you let that fear go? only you can decide if going on t is worth the potential downsides for you, but i suspect that for most of us, the benefits of going on t far outweigh the possibility of side effects like hair loss happening down the line.

[untoldstar]

gn! vampire x gn! reader who doesn’t gaf

Vampire who’s honestly sick of humans at this point.

An encounter with a human is just insulting to them. They’re a bloodthirsty predator who have been feared for centuries and now when they corner someone to drink their blood instead of a look of fear they get..pure delight?!

Peoples minds have been so washed by movies that they have lost any sense of self preservation. Instead of screaming for help they get giddy and excited. They’ve even encountered one person who purposed an arrangement of combining sex and feeding.

They obviously killed them after that and they didn’t even get their fill. After hearing such a thing you kind of lose your appetite.

One night they stumbled across you. Walking all along in the dead of night. No passing cars no witnesses..it’s almost too easy.

Eh they’ll try their luck. If you turn out to be annoying they’ll just snap your neck.

They drop down on you and corner you in an alley way smirking when they hear your heartbeat picking up. They force your head to the side and bare their fangs, their breath a chill fanning across your exposed neck.

“Silly human..Wandering around so helplessly, it’s almost as if you want me to feast on you.” They pause waiting for the usual breathy excited response.

They’ve come across people who go to deserted areas late at night on purpose hoping to stumble upon a hungry vampire. Those idiots don’t realize there could be humans who are far- far worse than vampires lurking in the darkness.

You sigh and their ears ache as they remember all the responses they’ve gotten over the last decades

“Can you not? I literally just got laid off my job. On a night shift too! Couldn’t fire me before I spent an entire night there?” You huff “I just really can’t do this tonight.”

Their eyes widen and they whip their head up with complete bewilderment all over their face “..What did you just say?!” That..was the last thing they were expecting to hear from a human.

Yes they always expect the usual excited responses. Of course there’s the terrified ones and even though they’re few and far between that doesn’t mean they’re completely crossed off the equation. But this..whatever it is you’re doing right now they weren’t expecting it.

What they didn’t know is that similar to themselves you were honestly done with the bullshit of everything. You couldn’t give a single shit what happens to you anymore. The economy sucks, the planet is dying, people have become desensitized and apathetic. Honestly either you go first or the planet does whichever goes quick.

But tonight was just really not it.

You wince “Also, I wouldn’t recommend my blood.” Valerians frown only deepens “My bloodwork is terrible. Honestly, I think it would have the opposite effect on you, I’m only saying this for your safety.” Valerian hisses “My safety- What are you blabbing about human?” They sneer “My immortality does not mean I am patient.” You huff and look around before going to pull your phone out of your pocket “Wanna reschedule?”

Valerian have never had an encounter as strange as as this one. How refreshing~ Perhaps they’ll run into you again, until then..they have to find their next meal.

part 2

How valerian was looking at reader the entire conversation:

[gacha-incels]

relegating the project moon/limbus ongoing situation as simply “drama” is incredibly reductive. perhaps it could have stayed this way had KJH not capitulated to the DCinside misogynists’ “femi” witch hunt. by firing her (let’s be real, they’ve been coy about it because they’ve lawyered up but we all saw it happen) for deleted tweets expressing support for pretty standard women’s rights issues in korea, PM has inserted themselves into the ongoing national conversation regarding female worker’s rights. This is why there have been multiple news articles surrounding this and unions have commented on it. These people aren’t trying to take potshots at PM from the peanut gallery, they have a vested interest in making sure this situation cannot happen in the future. This isn’t only about vellmori, her case doesn’t exist in a vacuum. As I said, it’s more like her case has been added to the overall conversation rather than the unions adding themselves into her sole conversation. This is one of the reasons they’re trying to pressure PM directly.

It’s ridiculous to compare the current protests to what the DCinside males did. It’s easy to do so you don’t have to think about it of course. For women in korea, it’s not just something they can pretend isn’t happening, it’s part of their reality. This isn’t just “drama” it’s something that effects them directly. In regards to thinking “both sides are bad” I’ll repost a reblogged reply I made here.

Sadly the reality of horrific and often times fatal misogyny in south korea that this situation is now a part of is ignored by many, downplayed or brushed off again by “both sides are bad”. In a lot of “explanations” of the situation for example the writer will try to explain megalia & korean feminism in detail but more vaguely reference why these women are trying to push back. So the reader will emotionally react to some harsh sounding statements or actions from women but feel less for the more vague or flat statistics presented of misogyny in the country. I also believe people are desensitized to misogyny in the west so when they read these “extreme” sounding statements from women they see it as a “both sides are bad” situation instead of an oppressed group fighting their oppressor. If the things men actually wrote about women, the femicides, molka, extreme rates of domestic abuse and cases like the Nth room were described in detail to give westerners a fuller picture of what Korean women are dealing with I think there could possibly be less western centrist opinions. Well this is what I’ve been seeing at least, it’s frustrating to see some women’s extremely harsh words for example compared to the physical and sexual violence epidemic there by men as “both sides are wrong” so I wanted to say something. What woman has done anything on par with Nth room? I’m not going to judge their activism tactics as I don’t live there, but it’s frustrating to see the two “sides” compared like they’re both the same in terms of extreme actions.

[frownyalfred]

*busts down your doors* HEY! Long ask for ya

okay so I was rereading your fic where EMS showed up because Dick couldn’t flip on the trampoline (rip) and it got me thinking about routine trauma.

So here’s the thing: I am not EMS. I know three people who are EMS, but my extent of EMS experience comes from one (1) ride along and lurking on EMS subreddits. Those guys are a hoot. Great memes. Anyways.

A comment stuck out to me: “You haven’t truly lived the job until you’re eating a gas station burrito next to a dead body”. I’ve seen a bunch like that. Nonchalance and dark humor because well, that’s their job. Gore is the norm. Sure, depending on the area, your usual calls might just be lift assists, but other areas are neck deep in gang violence and violent crime.

A pretty common post on that subreddit is also, sadly, “I just got a call that’s never bothered me before but all of a sudden I’m broken” or “I’ve never had a problem running this type of call before but all of a sudden it just hit me.” Delayed trauma is a bitch. Someone pointed out that if a civilian saw a fatal car accident with multiple corpses, they’d be in therapy and given support and it’d be a huge deal. With EMS, they’re just expected to deal with it. (EMS mental health is getting better- there are helplines and resources and first responder focused therapies- but it’s still a developing field)

ANYWAYS, now that I’ve given you a crash course on the EMS mental health crisis (someone should really write a feature on EMS in Gotham those fuckers would be crazy and I love them already), my point is, how would this apply to the bats? Seeing bodies is treated as very much the norm to them, but do you think it ever just… catches up? The impact of seeing corpses day after day? Do you think they have to fake being fine and tough during those times because well, “everybody else in the family is fine with it, I’m not going to be a liability/burden/weak/etc”

Do you think Bruce, the goddamn batman, who shouldn’t be ruffled by anything, ever just feels something crack inside when he looks at a little boy who could have grown up healthy and strong like his Jason, had (Bruce) someone been there for him? and then he can’t work cases with kids for a week?

This is such an excellent ask, thank you so much for gracing my inbox with it!

It's a very good question. I'm also on a lot of those subreddits (needed to do some research for that fic) and the discussion in those forums and on TikTok is like you described, a kind of practiced desensitization to all gore and suffering in order to survive in their job.

What I've seen from those discussions (and my EMT friend) is an almost sub-conscious trend where they allow themselves the "thing" that breaks them, and they push a lot of that trauma and emotion onto that thing. Like an EMT saying they don't do kids, or they don't do gunshots to the eye, etc. And they'll sob like a baby on those calls, while remaining stone-faced and level-headed through the triple homicide.

I'm just theorizing here, but I imagine the Batfamily uses similar coping skills -- pushing all that trauma and suffering into a box which cracks only under limited, defined circumstances. And they break or snap only under those conditions, because, subconsciously, they allowed themselves to.

So yes, Bruce might be 99% fine with most of the bodies he sees, but there might be a little boy who has a detail (like Jason's dark hair) that just slams into him out of nowhere.

PTSD and trauma literally change the structure of the brain. Individuals react differently to trauma after that, but there does appear to be a "desensitizing" effect with repeated trauma, as the body tries to compensate.

I agree that the Gotham EMTs must be some crazy motherfuckers. They probably deal with 6x the normal shit EMTs deal with in other cities. They probably take on a lot more trauma and burn out quicker than other EMTs, too.

Anyone else have thoughts on this? I admit I don't cover PTSD explicitly in a lot of my fics.

[moonlayl]

Even if all these people don’t actually care about the suffering happening in Gaza (which is beyond horrible, like these are lives we’re talking about) most seem to be completely ignorant of the fact that many people have family there. Some of my closest friends have lost dozens of family members this last month.

Like even if you don’t care because it’s happening in a different country, people you directly know could actually be deeply affected by grief, hate crimes, and intense survivors guilt.

From the article:

The disconnect and ignorance is insane. This is effecting millions of people both inside and outside of Palestine, including potentially your own friends, coworkers, acquaintances, professors, students, customers, employees, etc… to a devastating degree and so many of you, but mainly the government, does not care even slightly.

(Of course the destruction and horror the people of Gaza are facing does not even compare, but their families and friends also have to live with that loss and grief, and I’m not even talking about the very fact that it’s now been made clear that we have never been seen as humans or as equals even by a lot of liberals and leftists. Like we’ve always known to a degree but things have seriously changed after this. I can never look at most of the people I know the same ever again, online and in person)

Some of our lives have been completely and devastatingly altered and some of y’all are acting like this is just happening in a movie. Like it’s totally fine since it’s no where near you and since they’re Arabs and I guess it’s normalized for Arabs, especially Palestinians to suffer. Some of you have been desensitized to our suffering for way too long, it’s disgusting.

Anyways, please do not stop demanding for a ceasefire!!

[thompsborn]

!! the return of harley “daddy issues” keener (or is it mostly new angst? or mostly, like, physical?)

okay i love all these anons but also i am trying So Hard to not spoil things omg. please send more but also if i lowkey spoil something eventuallly it’s not my fault !! it actually definitely is entirely my fault but shhh

but anyways, kind of and also kind of not?

so like, in to build a family harley and peter are teenagers, but not like homeward bound. they’re high schoolers still, yk? they’re younger and haven’t gone through all the things that homeward bound harley and peter have gone through. i only bring up tbaf because obviously harley has Daddy Issues™ in tbaf. even before the second fic when his dad dies and he has to deal with that—in the first fic there’s a part where harley reminds his sister of their dad bc of how he left to go to new york and it’s this whole moment, yk? but he’s younger in tbaf and since tbaf is like not at all canon compliant to the mcu, they’ve gone through a lot less in comparison to hb, yk?

i say all that because while daddy issues are an ongoing lifelong thing for homeward bound harley, they aren’t as detrimental or as Big as they are in tbaf or other fics i’ve written where that comes up. hb harley is still effected by his daddy issues but he’s 18, he’s in college, he died for 5 years and came back to find out tony died, he has some family stuff that will be further explored and explained in the sequel with his mom and sister, and now also he has peter and the knowledge that peter is spider-man and the heaviness that comes with peter’s tragedies and past as well.

it’s a heaviness he’s okay with, don’t get me wrong, he’s more than happy to be there for peter and to learn these things and has been curious about peter since the first time peter walked into late night (again, will be explained more in the sequel!) but it’s heavy nonetheless, you know?

essentially, in the grand scheme of things, while he’s still impacted by his daddy issues, he also just… doesnt care anymore? like not caring doesn’t erase the impact but also he barely thinks of his dad and when he does he doesnt feel angry or upset or any of the things he felt in the past about his dad leaving, he just… doesnt care. he’s been through so much at this point that it’s just Another Thing. he’s desensitized to it to the point that like, why does it matter? it doesn’t.

there’s a part in hb, i can’t remember which chapter but it’s a small texting segment in one of the chapters where harry talks about him harley and peter making a no dad’s club for funsies and in that text convo harley mentions that he has a dad he just doesnt know where he is and doesn’t care enough to find out.

also, to answer that last part—it’s new angst that includes physical stuff! there’s gonna be… a lot lmao. i have a lot of things planned for this series, a lot of ideas taken from various comics, from the movies, from the games, etc. i’m even planning to read through plotlines for some of the animated series to see if there’s any additional ideas to draw from there.

but like, think of it this way, i guess: harley cares. a LOT. like some of his remaining daddy issues have developed in the form of being a bit slow to trust new people, but like he’s mentioned in the fic, once he chooses to care about someone, he is ALL IN. he is COMMITTED. and now that he knows about peter being spidey and is actively choosing to be involved in that, his instincts and his heart are going to want to do anything and everything he can to help.

okay actually sorry this answer is SO long BUT i remembered something i had harley say and i went back and looked and in chapter three he tells peter “my Mama says I have the heart of a protector” and THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT IM TRYING TO CONVEY HERE LMAO so THAT is who he is at heart yk?

and peter is gonna be in a lot of dangerous situations as spidey, and as the series goes on people connected to him are going to be in danger because of spidey, and essentially like…. a lot of emotions and a lot of angst and a lot of potential for getting hurt, yk?

i need to stop here because i keep almost saying fuck it and giving an example that is definitely a spoiler but yeah. take that as you will (:

[first-only]

Saw the Earn it act was back and had to pour myself a Jack and Coke

It feels like everything is just getting worse, I'm not even American, but whatever effects them effects us all (especially when it comes to the internet), let's be honest.

You've been alive longer than me (I presume anyway) how do you deal with shit like this?

Back in college I had to do a pretty standard research paper on some personality characteristics, mostly to teach us the basics of statistics and gathering subjects and the like. What really surprised me back then was that on the Resilience scale, older people scored much higher than younger on average. I had to analyze my results for the prof so I actually turned to my parents for a clue how to interpret this – afterall all my life I had witnessed the absolute dramatic reaction to social change mostly from older people and the full acceptance from younger on average. What my parents accurately caught and I didn’t was that Resilience is not necessarily your reaction to /change/ but to /tragedy/. Younger people didn’t see queerness for example as a horrible social development so they had no trouble accepting it. While older people on average have lived through many more personal and societal Bad Times, so they had built up more Resilience and thus scored higher (while of course still keeping some moral outrage for *some* things lol).

Of course a key point here is that /correlation is not causation/. Not all older people are more resilient, not all younger people are less, resilience is not necessarily built through living through and witnessing tragedy. You can’t take these things as Law, more as likelihood.

My point here is that there will /always/ be some bad things happening around you, and some will actively affect you, some will even happen *to* you. Life is one thing after the other and sometimes they overlap as the tumblr post goes. At some point you just learn to live with it. This too shall pass, it won’t always be like that, etc. Key here is that.. life just. Goes on. Yes the internet has been changed drastically and it will change again. Politics, personal life, friends’ lives, family. It will always be something and life will always go on. Even if your mundane everyday life is marred by tragedy, you will still have to eat, and sit around, and see the sky, and have a moment to just look around. Those small mundane things make our everyday and carry us through any horrible background.

And I know, I *know* this sounds like a ‘you get used to it’ or desensitization, but it’s more of ‘we will live, and we will see’. If you give all of your mental energy to the current crisis, and the one after, and the one concurrent, you *will* burn out. I’m not saying ignore everything and bathe in apathy, activism is a noble cause and it actually helps a lot of people deal with the emotional crisis of tragedy. But even if you dedicate your life to helping, you still have to learn self-regulation and personal detachment skills. Throwing it all in one thing will you leave you empty for the next. Especially when it comes to grand and immaterial causes like net neutrality, that are fought less in the streets by common people and more in courtrooms by experts (that do need support still), emotional burnout will not let you deal with personal and smaller issuer where you can actually actively help and make yourself feel better.

Don’t forget the good things. Paying attention to everything means also seeing the good around you. Be it globally and internationally or personally, even the mundane everyday things, the building blocks of reality. Of course we can’t be unaffected, but the positive needs to counteract the negative or we’re headed straight for an emotional crisis. Have a jack and coke, complain and vent to friends, escape reality in creativity or games or media. But don’t drown the negative, just remember, *life goes on*. Even if the law passes, we will see tomorrow again. There’s a 12 feet ladder for every 11 feet wall. The ways might be different, might be more complicated, but there’s always a way. You will have another jack and coke some day, and then again. There will be a controversial law again someday, and then again. We will try our best to do what we can about it, and then we will sit down and have dinner with our families. Tragedies will always happen, but we need the good to feed our fight with the bad. We need the stepping ladder, the foundation, of the mundane to go on with the extra. Change is gradual and humans are adaptive. You get out of bed, and tomorrow comes, and you get food, and meet people, go to bed again. Day to day. Support this cause or the other, fight in what little way you can. Take care of yourself and don’t let fear paralyze you. Be aware and know where we’re headed but don’t let the road crumble beneath you even before you’ve stepped on it. One thing at a time but all happen all together in the great scheme of things. Step by step. It’s okay. We’ll be okay.

[drkarenhawk]

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— Jessica K., 29, Mesa, AZ

Testimonial 5: Managing Depression and Finding Hope

_"For years, I struggled with depression but didn’t know how to get help. I’d tried therapy before, but it never felt like a good fit. When I found Dr. Hawk, I immediately felt like I was in the right place. She really took the time to get to know me and understand what I was going through.

Through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), I learned how my negative thought patterns were contributing to my depression. Dr. Hawk also helped me identify unhealthy coping mechanisms and introduced me to healthier ways to manage my emotions. In addition to CBT, she helped me develop practical strategies for increasing my energy levels and taking care of my physical health, which I had neglected for so long.

What made Dr. Hawk’s approach stand out is her focus on building self-compassion. She helped me stop being so hard on myself and taught me how to be kind to myself on the days when things felt overwhelming. Over the course of several months, I started to feel better, and now I’m living a life that feels more hopeful and meaningful. I’m truly grateful for Dr. Hawk’s expertise and her unwavering support."_

— Tom R., 50, Glendale, AZ

Testimonial 6: Improving Family Dynamics and Communication

_"As a family, we had been struggling with communication issues for years. My teenage daughter and I were constantly at odds, and my spouse and I felt like we were stuck in the middle. We decided to seek family therapy with Dr. Hawk in hopes of improving our relationships.

Dr. Hawk worked with us to identify the root causes of our conflicts and misunderstandings. She provided a safe space for all of us to share our feelings, and she helped us improve our communication skills so that we could listen to each other more effectively. Through her guidance, we learned how to express ourselves more openly and respectfully.

The changes in our family dynamics have been nothing short of amazing. We are more connected, and there is less tension in the home. Dr. Hawk’s ability to work with our unique family dynamic and help us work through our issues has been life-changing. We are truly grateful for her help in making our family stronger."_

— The Hernandez Family, Phoenix, AZ

Why These Testimonials Matter

The experiences shared in these testimonials highlight several key aspects of Dr Karen Hawk psychologist Arizona approach that have been transformative for her clients:

Empathy and Compassion: Dr. Hawk’s ability to create a safe, non-judgmental space is a common theme across the testimonials. Clients consistently describe feeling heard and understood, which is essential for effective therapy, especially when dealing with sensitive issues like trauma, depression, or relationship difficulties.

Tailored Therapeutic Approaches: Whether using CBT, EMDR, EFT, or mindfulness techniques, Dr. Hawk adapts her methods to meet the unique needs of each client. This personalized approach ensures that therapy is relevant and effective for each individual.

Long-Lasting Change: Many clients mention how their work with Dr. Hawk led to lasting, positive changes in their lives. This suggests that her therapy is not just about temporary relief but also about equipping clients with tools and insights that support sustained personal growth and healing.

Improved Relationships: Whether it’s overcoming anxiety, healing from trauma, or improving communication in a relationship, clients consistently mention how Dr. Hawk’s therapy helped them foster stronger, healthier relationships with themselves and others.

Conclusion

Dr. Karen Hawk’s clients consistently report positive and life-changing experiences. Through her expertise, compassion, and tailored therapeutic approaches, Dr. Hawk has helped individuals, couples, and families navigate some of life’s most challenging mental health issues. Whether you’re struggling with anxiety, trauma, depression, relationship issues, or navigating life transitions, Dr. Hawk provides the support and guidance you need to heal, grow, and thrive.

If you’re considering therapy in Arizona, the experiences shared by these clients reflect the profound impact Dr. Hawk’s care and guidance can have. Reach out to Dr. Karen Hawk and take the first step toward a healthier, more fulfilling life.

[betelgo0ze]

UPDATE ON MY CAT BEN(short for Obi-Wan)

fair TW I’ve worked with sick and injured animals since I was really REALLY young so this ofc makes me sad but in more or less desensitized but fair warning for POSSIBLY SICK CAT

BEN IS ALIVE! For those who don’t know, my parents got a divorce and he moved in with my aunt who has a few wild cats around her home. I’ve always grown up with wild cats around my yard and me and my nana(who lives with us) has nursed them back to health. I stay with my dad over the weekends btw but now that it’s the summer it’s kinda random but always at least twice a week, my parents are besties so it’s not like there’s a custody battle or anything.

Ben is one of the first cats I met here when he was a kitten and his tongue always hung out so I called him “Blep” but it’s been two or three months now and he stopped blepping all the time and as a joke I gave him a new name as a “reward” for learning how to put his tongue back into his mouth.

like I said in my earlier post, his legal name(once we bring him to the vet) will be Obi-Wan but we all call him Ben since he’s hiding from the galactic empire(my dads aunt is 80 and has 0 knowledge when it comes to Star Wars and gets so confused whenever I say that ben is short for Obi-wan)

anyways, we’re bringing a trap from my moms house to my dads so we can zoink him and fix whatever’s wrong

I think he has a broken jaw? Bc his tongue is back out more than ever

my other rescues all were blinded and each had one eye removed so I’ve always been good when it came to sick cats and I helped put medicine on their goop-covered eyes when I was nine. I don’t want to be a vet but I am well versed in the animal rescuing areas(I’m 16 btw)

just a random update for anyone and sorry if there’s no Grammer in this post in dyslexic and usually rewrite my posts multiple times lol I just wanted to share these cute pics of Ben but also why they might be vital to his survival.

he’ll be fine, it’s probably just a side effect of a sickness but I’ve seen worse it cats he’ll be fine and I’ll update for anyone who wants to know

[the-invisible-queer]

Lol I was just teasing, I don’t think it will effect the poll or anything it was just funny to me that for a buzzcut poll you used that pic instead of one where it was actually buzzed super short. I still think he looks awful before it starts growing out but I also find him more or less attractive in general based on how long his hair is at any given moment, so I guess I’m biased 😂

I prefer longer haired Nick

Like his current hair length is *chef's kiss*

I don't hate his buzzcut but maybe I've been desensitized from Kingdom

[gacha-incels]

yeah the denial stage is in full swing for a lot of western fans, I’ve seen many of those types of messages all across SNS along with the enlightened centrist “actually, both sides are bad!”, people falling for the DCinside’s smear campaign against Vellmori (the thought process here being if she’s given this boogeyman label then they don’t have to feel bad about what happened), the sentiment that “other games companies have done worse” (bargaining stage??) and the thought-terminating “let people enjoy things”. As you said there’s a huge amount of “we’ll just wait it out until people stop bringing it up” as if this issue will not effect how the game is created going forwards and to whom its contents will cater. The fact of the matter remains that PM immediately kowtowed to these misogynists demands and posted that they relieved vellmori of her position because of some deleted tweets. Most of us saw it happen live and it’s even in writing. Nothing will change these actions going forwards, even if they rehire her or post that they’re really sorry or whatever. It seems they have lawyered up now and have put vellmori in schcrödinger’s employment status as to not get sued.

Sadly the reality of horrific and often times fatal misogyny in south korea that this situation is now a part of is ignored by many, downplayed or brushed off again by “both sides are bad”. In a lot of “explanations” of the situation for example the writer will try to explain megalia & korean feminism in detail but more vaguely reference why these women are trying to push back. So the reader will emotionally react to some harsh sounding statements or actions from women but feel less for the more vague or flat statistics presented of misogyny in the country. Like you said I also believe people are desensitized to misogyny in the west so when they read these “extreme” sounding statements from women they see it as a “both sides are bad” situation instead of an oppressed group fighting their oppressor. If the things men actually wrote about women, the femicides, molka, extreme rates of domestic abuse and cases like the Nth room were described in detail to give westerners a fuller picture of what Korean women are dealing with I think there could possibly be less western centrist opinions. Well this is what I’ve been seeing at least, it’s frustrating to see some women’s extremely harsh words for example compared to the physical and sexual violence epidemic there by men as “both sides are wrong” so I wanted to say something. What woman has done anything on par with Nth room? I’m not going to judge their activism tactics as I don’t live there, but it’s frustrating to see the two “sides” compared like they’re both the same in terms of extreme actions.

For some I think the denial comes from a mix of guilt knowing what PM did was wrong but having “fandom” attachments to the game as I detailed above, and for others like you said they just want to “turn their brain off” (a sentiment expressed frequently in the subreddit) and consume media because they don’t see it as affecting them therefore they won’t care about it. Another sect of superfans see PM as “their brand” and will defend their actions as their own self worth depends on it. Of course I’m not saying this is everyone, and I do think it’s better to sit with your confused emotions regarding the situation and make a judgement based on that rather than not thinking about it at all and continuing to consume with your eyes and ears closed. It’s sad to see this getting swept under the rug but I agree PM will try and do just that and a lot of people will gladly go along with it as long as they get theirs. tbh for anyone reading this who’s wanting to do something else with your time I suggest creating something physical with your own hands as a hobby unrelated to “fandom” or reading the books the Limbus Company characters are modeled after if you’re missing them…

I think one of the reasons it’s hard for people to cold turkey drop being fans/consumers of a piece of contemporary media is how these “fandom” spaces on social media have been set up. you’ve got generalized spaces online (sub-reddits, tumblr, twitter, etc. I would put even those book and film review websites here and imageboards) where you can “join” a pre-existing group of friends completely based on specific pieces of media.

for those who are post-college years and perhaps more introverted, it’s easier to talk with people online in these places and you can log in 24/7. instead of making friends in a physical schooling atmosphere where you’re surrounded by other people daily for 12+ years, you can log in and make friends digitally by being surrounded by people who all consume the same piece of media as you. so your friendship is completely dependent on this piece of media for the most part.

for younger people growing up now I think this also ties into “finding yourself” where they will see consumption of a piece of media as a core tenet of their personality. I believe this is part of why there have been multiple posts about the Project Moon/Limbus Company situation that say “don’t worry whatever you choose you’re not a bad person either way.” This is also reinforced when people online comment “xyz fan” if they want to call your judgement of something into question. They have in effect assigned you a personality based on your consumption a videogame, for example. When the creators do something so ideologically opposite than what the work presents, it’s extra shocking to those fans who considered consuming the work as part of their personality. I think this way of consumption is also why, at least from what I’ve seen, there has been such a drive to label and categorize “aesthetics” into words you can search hashtags for or put in your online profile. This also has got to be a reason why people go so hard in their defense of whatever media, because they feel like when someone criticizes the media they consume they are in effect criticizing the person who consumes it. They are essentially trying to defend themselves.

When something shocking like the kowtowing to misogynistic men situation with Limbus Company, in a sense the way these “fandom” spaces work online now makes it harder for people to completely drop the game. The consumer now has online friendships and is in entire communities based completely on this media, maybe they have also even created fanart and fanfiction. For some of them it’s part of their personality. If they drop it completely they are also losing these online communities , friends and even a sense of self. I think this is a reason you will see a lot of fans ask “what fandom/game should I get into next”, they want to fill this void ASAP.

As a gacha game, Limbus further complicates this by getting the consumer into a routine they now have to break. Every day they have logged in, done the daily gameplay, even the events and gambling banners have a set schedule. These types of games typically have an ensemble cast with specific set types of personalities so fans can choose their favorite(s). As long as they make money they will keep making stories (just look at FGO), so it’s like having a never-ending story with your favorite character. It’s like a series of movies that always end with a teaser for the next one. It’s easy to get addicted, not just from the gambling aspect.

I was confused at first why other fans were having such trouble completely dropping the game because for me, it was like a switch turned off and I was able to stop caring completely. I think it’s amazing how some Korean fans have completely deleted all their fanart and even taken their fan merch back from the restaurant. But looking into how “fandom” works these days it seems this makes it harder to drop something completely. I’m not saying these are the only reasons, but it’s interesting how this works positively for companies that make these pieces of media that are up for public consumption.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

I suspect quite a few people on this site don’t realize they are struggling with the effects of chronic trauma. In particular I think more people need to learn about the symptoms of C-PTSD.

Distinct from general PTSD, Complex PTSD is caused by prolonged, recurring stress and trauma, often occurring in childhood & adolescence over an extended period of time. There are many risk factors, including: abusive/negligent caregivers, dysfunctional family life, untreated mental/chronic illness, and being the target of bullying/social alienation.

I’m not a mental health professional and I’m not qualified to diagnose anyone, I just remember a million watt light bulb going off in my head when I first learned about C-PTSD. It was a huge OH MY FUCKING WORD eureka moment for me—it explained all these problems I was confused and angry at myself for having. The symptoms that really stood out to me were:

Negative self-perception: deep-seated feelings of shame, guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, and stigma. Feeling like you are different from everyone else, like something is fundamentally ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’ with you.

Emotional avoidance of topics, people, relationships, activities, places, things etc that might cause uncomfortable emotions such as shame, fear, or sadness. Can lead to self-isolation.

Learned helplessness: a pervasive sense of powerlessness, often combined with feelings of desensitization, wherein you gradually stop trying to escape or prevent your own suffering, even when opportunities exist. May manifest as self-neglect or self-sabotage. (I remember watching myself make bad choices and neglect my responsibilities, and having no idea why I was doing it, or how to stop myself. Eventually I just stopped caring, which led to more self-neglect.)

Hyper-vigilance: always feeling “on edge,” alert, unable to relax even in spaces that should feel safe. May be combined with an elevated “flight” response, or feelings of always being prepared to flee. (I used to hide important documents and possessions in a sort of emergency go bag, even when I was living alone and there was no logical reason other than it made me feel “prepared.”)

Difficulty regulating emotions: may include mood swings, persistent numbness, sadness, suicidal idealization, explosive anger (or inability to feel anger and other strong emotions), inability to control your emotions, confusion about why you react the way you do.

Sense of foreshortened future: assuming or feeling that you will die young. Recurring thoughts that "I'll be dead before the age of 30/40/18/21 etc." As a teenager I used to joke darkly that I didn't plan to live past 30—not because I planned to end my life, but because I simply couldn't imagine myself alive and happy in the long-term. I couldn't imagine a meaningful future where I wasn't suffering.

Emotional flashbacks: finding yourself suddenly re-experiencing feelings of helplessness, panic, despair, or anger etc, often without understanding what has triggered these feelings. Often these flashbacks don’t clearly relate to the memory of a single event (since C-PTSD is caused by repetitive events, which can blur together), making them harder to identify as flashbacks—especially if you’ve never heard the phrase “emotional flashback” and don’t know what to look for. For years I just filed it under “sometimes I overreact/freak out randomly for no reason, probably bc I am just a terrible human being.” (It turns out there was very much a reason, it was just hidden in the past. I have since learned to be kinder and less judgemental towards myself.)

There are other symptoms too, here are more links with good info.

I’ve been meaning to write this post for awhile, because I’ve noticed that a lot of the people I interact with online have risk factors and experiences similar to mine. These include:

growing up in a dysfunctional household

having caregivers who do not fulfill basic emotional needs (do not provide consistent positive attention, encouragement, support, acceptance, communication, a sense of safety and security)

on a very related note, experiencing neglect or abuse at the hand of caregivers or other adults. I also want to emphasize the significance of emotional abuse, since it is hard to recognize, easy to ignore, and utterly rampant in so many communities. In general, family dysfunction, abuse & neglect are quite difficult to identify when you are a child/teen and that is the only “normal” you have known.

(For example, in my family it manifested as an emotionally absent father I was vaguely frightened of, constant nagging from a hypercritical mother, and a house full of people who yelled and screamed at each other. It took me years to realize I grew up in an abusive environment, because there was no physical violence, because I participated in the fighting, and because my behavioral problems made me the family scapegoat. And I internalized that guilt: I thought I was the problem. But no—I was a child, and I deserved not to grow up in a household full of anger and fear and negativity. You deserved that too. You deserved to grow up safe and loved and treated with kindness.) 

anyway back to more risk factors:

being neurodivergent or chronically ill (especially without receiving proper treatment/support/accommodation)

being queer (especially in a conservative or undiverse community, or without the support and acceptance of family & friends)

being the target of bullying or harassment (from peers, teachers, authority figures, irl, online, etc)

being isolated or alienated from peers, from family, from your wider community.

growing up with chronic anxiety, discomfort, pain, fear, or distress caused by any of the above and more.

There are many other experiences that can cause chronic trauma, but these are some particularly common ones I see people in my own community struggling with. And I want more people to be aware of this, because we’ve been taught to ignore and second-guess the significance of our traumatic experiences. We’ve been taught to feel guilty for our own pain, because “other people aren’t struggling, so I shouldn’t either” or (contradictorily) “other people have it worse, so I shouldn’t complain.” But that’s not how it works—you are not other people, and you deserve to have it better. We all deserve better. We deserve to be happy. We deserve not to be in pain.

I used to think I couldn’t have a trauma disorder because (I argued in my head) the things that happened to me weren’t that bad. And then I spent five years in therapy learning to accept the full extent of my issues. I’ve since learned that trauma comes in many forms, and can happen quietly, invisibly, silently, chronically, and usually without the survivor being aware of the long-term repercussions of what they are surviving. That revelation comes later, after you have survived and must instead learn to live.

Finally, no single type of trauma is more real or harmful than any other. Severity is measured by the way the individual is affected, and the same situations affect different people in different ways. Because no one gets to choose how their brain reacts to trauma. No one gets to choose their hurt—otherwise there would be a hell of a lot less hurting in the world.

We can, however, choose to seek help. We can learn to recognize when something is wrong, we can learn when to reach out to professionals, and we can learn to educate ourselves on our injuries.

And gradually, we can learn to heal.

(posts like this brought to you by ko-fi supporters)

[edgelordfucker]

Ok so like what are some of the freakiest things Belos and y/n get up to like bdsm and kink wise and shit also just gotta say that I love your work so so much

NSFW - MDNI

CW: VERY KINKY. Mentions of consensual non-con, period play, and scent kink.

Thank you, Anon!! I hope you like this, too. :D This was done off the cuff in one sitting (which is nigh unheard of for me), so if this reads as odd or disjointed, désolé. 

Kink is a spectrum, and freakiness is subjective, and I’m deeply desensitized to what people think is kinky, so I’ll do my best! This is less what I personally think is freaky, and more what I assume might be Out There for other people.  

So, you do the tamer stuff, like spanking, restraints, rope bondage, suspension, breath play, power exchange, bratting/brat taming, et cetera, but vis-a-vis the freakiest things you do together? 

Presented in a convenient list format, so that one can skip over the stuff one doesn’t like:   

Consensual non-con - He really likes the idea of using you against your will, particularly if it’s more coercive than outright brute force. He has this scenario in his head, of a coven scout being gently pushed into showing exactly how much they love their Emperor. ;) However, he’s absolutely not opposed to just pinning you down and fucking you, while you kick and scream and cry. 

Predicament play - He’ll bind you and touch himself while he watches you struggle to free yourself, preferably with a toy inside you. This tends to be a punishment. There’s something about you, spitting mad and totally helpless, all for his gratification, that he deeply enjoys. So far, you haven’t managed to escape without breaking down, which is when he likes to turn the toy up. :)

Non-human/alien genitalia - Belos will use potions or magic to change whatever he’s got going on that day (he’ll switch between a cock and a cunt, or some mix of both depending on his mood, but that’s more gender expression and less kink) into something impossible for humans and most witches. He’s given himself knots, and frills, and tentacles, and soft spikes - pretty much anything you can imagine, he’s indulged in. 

Monsterfucking - There have also been times that he’s lost control of his curse, and taken you like that - the first time was traumatic, because neither of you were prepared for it. It’s not something that happens often. Belos doesn’t like being out of control like that, but he does occasionally slip up, and the beast takes hold. Luckily, it recognizes you as its mate, so you’re safe (even if you can’t walk after), but anyone else is fair game for mauling. 

Primal play/scent kink - Belos has heightened senses as a side effect of the curse, so he’s really attracted to the way you smell. He’ll steal dirty panties or worn shirts to sniff while he masturbates, and the first time you came in a pair just for him, he lost his mind. He’s also always jockeying to get his nose between your thighs, or wherever else your scent is strong. Breasts (where applicable), neck, underarms, all fair game.  

Come marking - He’ll finish inside you, or on your panties, and make you walk around like while you do your work in the castle. Belos really wants to finish on your chest and rub it into your skin, too, but that would get... obvious, so he never goes that far when it might be noticeable to other people. He talks about it, though, when you're on your knees for him, or when he's inside you during your mid-day quickies.

And, of course, you’ll do it privately, in his quarters - he likes marking you when you’re nude, but there’s something about you being perfectly put together and going about your typical day-to-day - doing chores, baking, reading in his private library - while having his come all over your tits under your clothes that drives him crazy. (And you also smell strongly of him, so that’s part of it, too.)

Period play (where applicable) - Belos doesn’t mind a mess. He’ll fuck you while you’re on your period, and likes the way it looks when your blood is smeared all over his cock, and mixes with his come as it drips out of you. He’ll also go down on you while you’re on your period. He’ll leave your tampon in, or just focus on your clit while he fingers you. 

This doesn’t really have a kink category, but I thought the concept might be novel to some people - Sometimes he’ll finger your mouth like he’d finger your other holes. Gently tracing your lips, slipping his fingers past them to play with your tongue, pulling them out to softly rub and pinch your lips, pausing to kiss you deeply, dipping back in to fuck your mouth, et cetera.

If you’d like me to extrapolate on any of these, let me know! I already have a period play ask that I’m working on, though. :D

[argumentativeaxolotl]

TW FOR MENTIONS OF CERTAIN TOPICS

(Mentioned pedophilia, Zoophilia, glorification of bad shit, real life cases, etc. keep yourself safe)

CLARIFICATION FOR THIS PART OF THE BLOG: WHEN I STATE “Pro-shipper” I MEAN THE ONES WHO JUST WANT SILLY GAYS. SOMETIMES IT WILL MEAN THE ENTIRETY OF THAT SIDE OF FANDOM AS WELL. WHEN I MENTION “Extreme Pro-shipper” IT MEANS THE ONES WHO GLORIFY RAPE/PORN/GORE/INCEST, ETC. IT ALSO MEANS THE REALLY DARK SIDE OF THE FANDOM.

I never said I WAS the good guy- I’m saying it’s hypocritical for people to scream and cry at me for not wanting to interact with certain groups of people in the fandom when I have every right to keep a distance from them for my own peace of mind and for my own safety. It’s also hypocritical for people to go out of their way to blow up my notifs just to tell me I’m an asshole effectively ruining their chances of making peace before either of us get the chance to say anything. People going out of their way to blow up my notifs- you guys want me sooooooo bad~ Stop it I’m blushing 😍(/j)

In all seriousness, unfortunately there ARE extreme proshippers that when you simply just tell them that you don’t agree with their ship or that you’re uncomfortable they’ll get nasty with you and call you an anti(even if some people are not. It’s not black and white- some people aren’t antis, but aren’t pro-shippers or they don’t give a shit and don’t have a label on it or they lean more towards one side than the other) and will defend all of their ships with their life and will defend their entire circle with their life and a lot of the times they don’t truly know the people within their circles. Denying their existence isn’t going to help you(generalizing here) or anyone on the pro-ship side. It’s impossible to know who’s simply just there for the taboo, fictional ships and who’s using the platform to glorify things which causes younger audiences to become more and more desensitized to certain things which they shouldn’t be desensitized to. You also can’t tell me to fuck off of Ao3 just because it’s a pro-ship platform- you can’t gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss ao3😭. Yeah it’s for pro-shippers, but it’s not like there are any other quality websites everyone else can use. It’s like how I can’t gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss fanfics— which I don’t. I tell people to get lost if they fuck with glorifying gross shit(albeit I could’ve been more specific and/or less harsh and I admit that). The only part of my fics that I gatekeep are the comments- if someone’s being a lil too freaky on the comments, they get deleted. It’s that simple. People can still read the fic or not read the fic- I can’t control other people’s actions.

I’ve already stated it before but I’ve already ADMITTED WHAT I SAID WAS TOO FAR. I’ve already changed it so there’s no more of an issue there. We all agree to disagree since I’m clearly not changing my stance. I am allowed to find certain parts of fandom disturbing and I simply move on unless it’s a topic of discussion. I am allowed to have opinions on people much like you guys are. People are allowed to perceive me as an asshole and I’m allowed to defend myself when a shit-ton of people I have never met nor have I interacted with in my life begin attacking my person and my beliefs. I am allowed to fight back. Just like how you are allowed to do/believe whatever you want about me and ship whatever the fuck you want. I do not care as long as real people aren’t harmed and horrible things aren’t glorified.

I never said I could control who does and doesn’t read my fics, people like what they like and I don’t really give a fuck what someone reads or writes unless they’re glorifying shit like rape and incest which should never be glorified and should never be romanticized and should never be shown to kids. I’ve also said that I’ve probably had the misfortune of interacting with a degenerate on the platform, but I can/will never know unless they act degenerate in my comments or I see them elsewhere acting degenerate. I can’t take steps to protect myself or my small portion of a community and my work unless I know who I’m defending myself against. I can get people to back off but again NOBODY HAS GONE OUT OF THEIR WAY TO BE RESPECTFUL AND ASK ME IN PRIVATE OR PUBLICLY TO CHANGE/EXPLAIN THAT I HAVE DONE SOMETHING WRONG AND THAT IT COULD BE OFFENSIVE. Most of you have simply started with “yeah you are an asshole” and then expect me to react calmly to that(thank you @andarthas-web for not outright calling me a dickhead and explaining how I’ve made people feel unsafe. I appreciate it and I will use this as constructive criticism with my fics in the future- I will keep your words in mind and I will make sure not to use such harsh and strong language in the future). I’ve already said that I didn’t make it clear that I meant the extreme side of the fandom and I already admitted that’s on me. Every single side of every fandom has an extreme side with people who take it too far. Extreme antis go out of their so harass people or feel the need to express their (sometimes justified) disgust or other things or they’ll take that disgust and become far too personal with it. Extreme proshippers glorify rape and incest or defend every. Single. User. On their side of the fandom which CAN INCLUDE Pedos and groomers etc. I never said all of them protect groomers and pedos, I said it’s impossible to tell which from which because I’d love to block the ones who do support the degenerates and I’d love to block the ones who legitimately romanticize disgusting shit like that. I don’t believe everyone on that side of the fandom protect the creeps- I simply said it’s impossible to tell since a lot of the time some people(unfortunately the louder minority) go out of their way to blatantly disrespect everyone who criticizes them or their fics or their taste in fics and then they’ll go out of their way to defend all parts of their fandom instead of cutting out the bad eggs and kicking them to the curb. It’s like a defense mechanism. It’s like with the furry fandom- unfortunately there’s a disgusting amount of people in that fandom who romanticize minors and animals and sexualize things that shouldn’t be sexualized or even have a fetish about. That’s one of the main reasons people dislike that fandom(aside from people thinking it’s weird, but I digress) because no people with actual power are actively taking steps to keep the degenerates out or to keep them accountable for their actions.

People need to understand that FICTION DOES BLEED INTO REALITY. People with certain mental illnesses perceive the world differently or something of the sorts and sometimes people are so far gone that they think things they do in the real world will somehow affect their favorite characters or creepypasta or something. Sometimes it’s also just the fact that people can’t seem to get off their device, sometimes mental illness has nothing to do with it, although it is more likely. A few instances of fiction bleeding into reality are:

The Slenderman Stabbing Case from 2014 where two girls(mentally ill) believed that they could make Slenderman appear by doing a ritual or some bullshit and tried to kill their third friend.

The Danny Phantom Killer when a mentally ill man believed that a character from Danny Phantom was apart of the afterlife and that she would be his girlfriend and that he’d get to join her girl band after he died(all of this within his actual diaries and tapes). He went out to commit a mass shooting trying to get as much recognition as the kids who committed the Columbine shooting.

Even the fucking Bakugo Tampon thing from TikTok can count since she thought using her- uh- blood could help bring him back from the dead or get the creator to listen or something.

(If you can stomach it and it’s not too triggering or badly affects your mental health, I’d recommend doing the research yourself instead of just taking my word or being unknowlegable about these instances. Or at least a Google search of what happened.)

The point is that Fiction unfortunately does bleed into reality because of people. People hurt other people. Sometimes those people who hurt other people need mental help because they’re not stable, sometimes they don’t and just can’t understand or handle or cope with the fact their favorite character died or isn’t actually real or something. If someone glorified rape and grooming and murder instead of pointing focus at it being wrong, it can lead to certain audience members not realizing it is wrong and they continue to consume more and more of that type of media and content. This included younger members- kids aren’t idiots, but they’re extremely malleable- like clay. It’s why if a child experiences violence at home they’ll commit violence on other people as a sort of fucked up way to cope since that’s all they know. Sometimes that behavior can be corrected with outside help, sometimes it isn’t. Imagine what happens when those same people never get corrected? That they never realize that pedophilia, zoophilia, grooming, etc aren’t okay to do? Some people consume so much of certain media that it essentially bleeds into them.

It’s like when you emanate your favorite character’s traits and personality from a TV show without realizing it- you consume so much of a certain media that you suddenly start having those mannerisms.

Nobody plays GTA and suddenly goes out and commits a felony or kills people, never said it did. But there’s a reason kids aren’t meant to be exposed to that kind of “mature” media- kids aren’t meant to be exposed to porn, gore, violence, etc because they can become desensitized— I would know because I was unfortunately one of those kids with too much internet access. Kids- or really anyone- who consume too much of a certain media will consciously or subconsciously begin to emanate certain aspects of said media. It should be our jobs as human beings or as older members of the fandom to make sure that younger members are safe by keeping them away from certain members of fandoms. Im not saying we parent them or guide them, but we shouldn’t sit on our asses if we see someone actively getting groomed or interacting with members of the fandom that are known to be more problematic and toxic than others. There’s always going to be shitty people in fandom- there’s shitty antis who do horrible things for no reason and who are horrible and nasty to people and won’t listen to anybody even if someone is being nice, but it’s like you’re saying that there aren’t any shitty people on the pro-ship side which isn’t true. You’re actively blinding yourself. That’s the issue I have with extreme proshippers. You(generalized) can’t blind yourself to your own side of the fandom without consequences.

If you some of you guys had wanted to have a regular conversation with me instead of going out of your way to insult me and call me childish, undeserving, an asshole, etc, I would have listened. If you had calmly explained that “hey, you were a bit harsh, maybe you could word it differently?” I would have listened. But a lot of y’all(not everyone) went out of your way to take it personally and to have to pound it into my brain that I’m the asshole. It’s not cute and it’s not really working. It’s also not helping your side of the discussion. It’s also not helping that a lot of you haven’t even remotely tried to keep calm, instead insulting me and expect me to listen to you when you do. I’m trying my best to not insult you since I know that wouldn’t solve anything.

I’m allowed to be disgusted just like how you’re allowed to be disgusted.

And yeah I’m screaming you can’t interact. So what? Only harms myself. If someone still wants to read it and is a proshipper it’s not like I’m gonna know who is and who isn’t unless they outright tell me they are one. It’s not like I’m going to suddenly explode or a pro-shipper suddenly explodes just by reading a “proshippers DNI” fic.

If someone has an issue they can block me. If I have an issue I can block them. If they don’t like it they can just not read. If I don’t like something I can just not read.

It works both ways, yet when I mention it I get yelled at 💀.

And guess what? Yeah I’m allowed to scream “HEY DON’T INTERACT WITH THIS” since yeah. It’s my work. It’s up to the people reading if they wanna listen to that or not- again it’s not like I’m gonna be able to tell them apart unless they tell me or I see it with my own eyes.

And like you said pro-shipping is a core aspect of Ao3 so the only person a Proshippers DNI is gonna hurt is me. It’s cutting my audience down. By a lot.

In all honesty I am a pro-shipper but hesitant to use that label because of how much of a shitty reputation the vocal minority of that side of the fandom has been and how some people get way too heated over a fictional ship. I think people should be allowed to ship what they want(without it being weird and gross) and be people should be allowed to ship silly little gays and write a better love story than canon(cough cough KLANCE cough cough) but with the way some people on that side act like it’s life or death if you don’t like a certain ship kills me. Again I don’t give a shit if someone wants to- in their own time- read/write about taboo, problematic ships, but I draw the line at actually romanticizing it. I won’t read/write it myself and I ignore it since I do believe it’s gross. Unfortunately pro-shipping has become problematic shipping because of how “open”- honestly too open- a lot of members of that side are. Maybe we should even have a third and fourth category where all the extreme and vocal minority of antis & pros go so we can avoid such huge conflict between sides and we- as a whole- can make sure nobody gets hurt because people turn a blind eye or defend just by principal.

AGAIN; I’ve already stated I was too harsh and I’ve already stated that the description of the fic has been changed. It still has a DNI because ofc it does, but less harsh language. There’s no point in keeping that part of the discussion up since we’re at a stalemate there.

putting a dni on a fic is dumb you got what you deserved 🤷

Can you explain to me WHY it’s dumb and WHY I got what I “deserved”? Plenty of other people legit bash and harass proshippers which I didn’t do. People have said worse things on more popular fanfics than my own. I did not harass anyone therefore I didn’t do what I was accused of. I don’t want to interact with proshippers so I make sure people know it’s not a fic for them and that it won’t be a “supportive” or “safe space” for them since I very clearly don’t support proshipping. It’s MY comment section and I’m going to make sure it’s a safe space for other people who aren’t proshippers or who are anti. If this prevents a stupid ass fucking ship war then so be it. I know I can’t control or dictate what other people do or say, but again, it’s my comment section and if someone says some weird creepy shit then I don’t want to interact with that and I doubt most people would want to either.

Genuinely curious as to why I would be “getting what I deserved” since I didn’t do shit and I’m the one essentially being “”””harassed”””” 💀