#it’s been almost 8 years or so since I did my last transformers nonsense and i miss them

[froggies-bloggies]

I want to reread mtmte and I shouldn’t because driftrod has the biggest fucking hold on me to this day and I can’t be the transformututal again

But actually I could

But I know my hearts going to break when drift goes off and him and rodimus meet again and don’t end up together and I hate dratchet with a burning fiery passion even though in every other transformers ideation ratchet is my favorite and nenemensnnenemwkwnbsbs

Driftrod

[azureflight]

My entire friend group have uninstalled WoW and started FF14

It still feels surreal we are doing this. Now, it is perfectly possible that we will be back to WoW within the month, talking about how disappointing the “weeb game” was, but, this stills feels like a seminal moment.

I have been a Warcraft fan since I was a literal kid trying (and failing :P) to play Tides of Darkness on my aunt’s desktop. I spent so many hours and so much of my allowance playing Reign of Chaos in internet cafes. 

When WOTLK trailer dropped, we had hijacked the computer lab and projected it to the auditorium for all to see. 

I have been part of real life, unironic Horde vs Alliance infighting in college gaming clubs. I remember us all wearing Horde/Alliance merch, enthusiastically and rather foolishly, but completely seriously, arguing about lore, about who did what wrong and who was “more at fault”.

I own, almost every single Warcraft book, comic, guide ever published. I own hard copies, I own digital copies. I have watched and read and listened to every single piece of lore ever produced about this setting.

I have kept my sub up and played through all of the content draught, the infamous SoO, the practically less than 2 patch worth expac that was WoD.

I have allowed my sub to lapse for the first time during BFA. 

I was so hyped for Shadowlands back when it was announced, and was annoyed when they changed the release date, causing me to waste my vacation time that I had taken for it. But a mere month of the expac in and I was already bored of it. And now, 9.1 is out and I am done. I barely played this patch and I have not only cancelled my sub, but went and removed the game from my PC.

Maybe this is a stupid overreaction and in the next patch, at the worst the next expac, I will be right back at the fur shop like the old fox I am. However, I know it feels different.

Throughout the years, I had many a thing that frustrated me about this game. Made me rage even. But I hadn’t quit then. No. The feeling that has been creeping up on me, isn’t rage. It is disinterest. I just, don’t care anymore. 

Most of my friends over the years have switched to the Horde and this has been a sore spot for me. I stuck with Alliance, having some alts to play with them, and they had some Alliance alts to play with me, but... It wasn’t the same, it wasn’t enough. Several online friends, I had already lost contact with.

And now we are all gathering in FF14! I had the discord chat of my life! So many people I hadn’t talked to in years, on top of my actual real life friends whom I hang out with, are all jumping into this new journey.

My best friend’s progression guild is looking to make a full guild transfer, currently all of them except one have characters and a guild in FF, trying to convince the last guy to make the switch.

And then there is the lore. That’s why I fell in love with this setting in the first place. I loved this story, the cheese, the heroism, the over the topness, all of it. It was never “high art”, but it was unique in its own way, it had heart and it had characters and stories that I got invested in. Deeply so. I hadn’t start playing WoW because I was a connoisseur of MMORPG genre and “calculated it to be the best among its contemporaries”. I dived head first in Vanilla because it was Warcraft.

And now, I honestly cannot bring myself to care about this story, or its characters, other than a passing resentment. This was not the case, less than a year ago. I had bought the bloody Shadows Rising novel, I had read it and I liked it.

Now I am just, over it. This sense was rising, this sense of feeling less and less care for it, as expac after expac went in wildly nonsensical directions. But I had things that I had liked well enough to keep at it and have hope, hope for a good enough story that would keep me engaged. But I lost it. Something broke in 9.1.

I guess I realized, or rather I perceive, that the actual writers of this story do not care about it and none of it matters. There is no story. There is no plot, no continuity. Just an endless stream of “cool” shots in cinematics that ultimately don’t matter because, it has no basis and it has no relevance. It exists because someone wanted to make this cool scene, without caring what came before it, or what will come after it. Each scene exist, not to progress a cohesive story, but simply because someone wanted it to exist. And the next “cool” piece will flagrantly retcon the last one, ignoring or outright invalidating the stakes and hooks that had been set up in the previous one. 

This is no longer a story of people, who were dramatic and weird and fantastical, but ultimately people. No. This is now a check list of what someone wanted to do in WoW setting and all the characters are empty puppets and all the plots matter only as much as they matter in any given single cinematic or questline. There is no pay off, and there is no logic. Characters aren’t allowed to live and react. Things only happen because the author said so, and the characters just bend and transform to do their bidding. And they feel no reason to explain nor establish as to why a character acts the way they do, let alone trying to make it believable or internally justified.

The gameplay aspect is the least important to me, the exact opposite of the majority. But I am sick and tired being punished with powerlessness for what I like story wise or aesthetically. I am sick and tired needing to read through guides upon guides, copying meta builds, just to have my class be remotely playable.

And most importantly, I am sick and tired of a game that will put me through genocide, deny me justice and vengeance under the guise of need for cooperation and then deny me playing with my friends across factions.

Now I get to play with all of my friends without jumping over the hoops or giving up on what I love. Because there are no stupid factions in FF14. And I can play multiple classes without hating myself.

I had several favorite characters in this game. They are still, mostly, alive. But do I care about them anymore? Jaina, Anduin, Sylvanas, Turalyon, Tyrande, Genn... No. I don’t care and it doesn’t even hurt anymore, it just feels like I had wasted my time and money. It feels exactly like how I felt during season 8 of GoT. An empty feeling of waste, so I leave.

Will I care about the characters or the story in FF14? I don’t know. I don’t think I will stick around if I don’t. But will I go back to WoW? A piece of me wants to hope for a superb turn around, but... Honestly? I don’t see it happening. And anything less than an epic turn around that fixes all of this, the lore, the classes, the playerbase division? I won’t bother anymore.

So off to the greener pastures! Maybe I will come crawling back within the blink of an eye, eating this post, repenting for ever having left. Maybe... I just don’t think so.

[axiomsend]

In a Crowd of Thousands

Loki x Gender Neutral!Reader, set in between Thor: The Dark World and Thor: Ragnarok. Loki is currently pretending to be Odin.

Word Count: 1,744

Contains: Reunions, Threats of Violence, Angst?, Fluff?

Inspiration: In a Crowd of Thousands from Anastasia.

As the child of one of Vanaheim’s two senators, you were expected to make appearances with your mother often- or as often as an 8-year-old would allow. People weren’t exactly expecting you to appear at every signing of a bill into law, but they were expecting to see you at fun things. The kind of events that kids dream of taking a part of, or at least look up at in wonder. This was one of those events: a parade celebrating the over thousand-year peace between Asgard and Vanaheim, cemented when Frigga and Odin were married.

You sat high on a carriage, next to your mother. You were dressed in fine Vanheimian silks, enshrouding your body and making a hot summer that much more unbearable. You began to fuss with the sleeves on your outfit when you took notice of something odd. A small child, extremely disheveled and dirty, staring directly at you from the crowd.

As your carriage moved by, you saw him begin to move, trying to catch up with you. The guards spot him, but they can’t catch him. He is able to dodge them and escape from the crowd into the parade. He begins to run towards you, shouting your name the whole time. Your mother realizes this boy is very persistent and elects to stop the carriage so that he doesn’t get run over by it. You smile at him as he bows. The guards finally catch up to him and take him away, and you wave goodbye to him as he is dragged away kicking. The parade starts up again, and you continue on the rest of your day thinking about that day.

You still think about that day now and then- even a thousand years later. Not much has changed since then- your homeworld is still a democracy, run by two main senators. The only real difference is the people in power- now, one of them is you. It’s your first term as a Senator, though you’ve had a lot of experience in the local politics of your homeworld. Unfortunately, that’s not very helpful when it comes to politicking with leaders of the other Nine Realms. The last time you left Vanheim, and subsequently met any kind of leader outside your own world, was that parade. But now, you're going back.

Five years had passed since Frigga was killed by the Dark Elf Algrim. The peace between Asgard and Vanheim was as strong as it ever was, but the people of Vanheim were weary. To appease your people, and to ensure that the peace remained strong, yearly visits to Asgard were implemented. It was more for keeping up appearances than anything, but you had been warned by your predecessor had informed you this usually came with in-depth philosophical discussions.

You knew something was off as soon as you arrived. You were not greeted by Heimdall. Instead, some man named Skurge had welcomed you. You might have been a child when you were last here, but you distinctly remembered the Bifrost Bridge being more colorful, shining more brilliantly, and having less stuff littering it. By the time you make it to the throne room, you are thoroughly convinced some trickery is afoot. The person pretending to be Odin, sitting atop his throne confirms this.

You can tell right away that it’s not Odin. Your people are one of old magic and trickery, and this is an obvious example of a well-crafted, almost perfected glamour. But you can see through the cracks. The puzzle now is figuring out who is pretending to be Odin- without causing the people of Asgard to panic at the fact their ruler is not who he says he is.

“Greetings, Senator Y/N of Vanheim. Welcome to Asgard. I trust your journey here went smoothly.” The false king states.

You bow your head in keeping with tradition. “Greetings, Odin, All-father, Protector of the Nine Realms. My journey was safe and swift, and I am thankful to have the honor to be in your presence once more.”

“You honor me, Senator, with your respect for my right as King. Come now, let us dine together.” You raise your head again and begin following the false Odin into the dining room.

Thankfully, another part of the tradition is for Odin to eat dinner with the Senator of Vanheim alone upon their arrival in Asgard. Which gives you the perfect opportunity to figure out who is masquerading behind the facade of Odin. As soon as you are alone together, you make your first move: Undoing the magic being done to pretend to be Odin. You are unsurprised to see who it is, but something now seems eerily familiar about him that hadn’t before.

“How did you do that?” He asks, puzzled that he looks like himself again.

“What are you doing, Loki?” Your voice is sharp but quiet, careful not to alert anyone who may be trying to listen to the huge secret you’ve just unveiled.

“What does it look like I’m doing? And you haven’t answered my question.”

You take a huge deep breath and let the air flow out slowly through your mouth so you don’t immediately fly into a rage. You are still a Senator, after all. “If you had studied the magics like you had been told too, maybe you would know the answer. Now, where is Odin?” You begin walking towards him, and he walks backward to keep the distance between you.

“I have no idea.” His answer sounds honest, but you know it’s a lie. He has backed himself into a corner, and you stand in front of him, about the block him in when he teleports to the other side of the room.

“Do not test me, Prince,” You begin, conjuring a gigantic ball of flame, “Where is your father? What have you done to him?”

“Senator, please calm down. We wouldn’t want a diplomatic incident, now would we?” Loki is smirking at you, thinking he’s got you in a bind. But he doesn’t realize he’s already lost.

You glare at him and put out the flame. “See, now that wasn’t that-” His speech is interrupted by you transforming into him, and reconjuring the flame.

“Do not trifle with me, Prince. I would be more than happy to kill you and replace you if it meant no one else must suffer at your hand. Now tell me. Where is your father?”

“He’s in a retirement home on Earth.” You transform back into yourself instantly upon this revelation and put out the flame once more.

“What in his name is he doing on Earth in a retirement home?” Your anger is gone, you are just tired now. Tired of the trickery, and games. And you really just want to eat.

“I put him under a spell. Wiped his memories.” You want to cry. Your first visit back to Asgard and it’s a total disaster.

You hesitate before asking, “How long have you been at this?”

“Five years” You look up at the ceiling and bite your lip to prevent yourself from screaming. When you look back at Loki you stop biting your lip and instead smile, and clap.

Through gritted teeth you shout, “Let’s Eat!” He opens his mouth to say something, but you are done with his nonsense. You cast a spell to temporarily prevent him from speaking. He glares at you, but you ignore him. You sit down next to each other at the table and eat the dinner you had been craving since you arrived.

After you finish the meal, you reverse the spell, and tell him, “You are the luckiest Prince in the Nine Realms, Loki.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s luck. I worked pretty hard to get here.”

“Loki. You do realize that had any other Vanheimian Senator, let alone any other ruler of any of the Nine Realms, found out your secret before me, they would have killed you on the spot?”

“Then why haven’t you killed me, Senator?”

“I’d rather not have to deal with the war that will come after that. Even if I am justified, it would destabilize all the Nine Realms. I will not sacrifice millennia of peace because you decided to rule Asgard for five years.” You reply.

“I am grateful.”

“You know,” You start, and you're not sure why you’re telling him this, “I’ve been waiting a millennium to come back here. And this is what I find now that all this time has passed. A Prince playing at being King.”

“A millennium?” There is a shift in his tone as he asked.

“Yes, a millennium. I keep thinking back to the day my mother and I came here. She was a Senator at that time, and we were in a parade. There was a boy-”

“That was you?” The realization hits him first, and his whole demeanor shifts.

“What do you mean that was me?” You are in denial.

“I was that boy. The one who made you smile and got dragged away by guards- that was me.”

“Are you telling me the day I couldn’t stop thinking about for centuries, that the boy I wanted to come back and find- that was you?” You really wish this was one of his tricks, but it’s not. It’s obvious it’s not. The way he’s looking at you like he’s just rediscovered the love of his life, tells you he’s not lying.

“You couldn’t stop thinking about it either?” He asks.

“I wanted to find you again.”

“So did I.” He chuckles, “It seems ridiculous now. I spent a decade looking for you, but my mother said-”

“Don’t worry, child. You will meet again one day when the fates allow?” You finish his sentence.

“Yes, exactly.” Loki smiles at the memory of Frigga.

“So what now?” You ask.

He reaches out for your hand and you give it to him. “We make up for lost time.” He kisses you, and you kiss him back. It is the kiss of a long-lost love, full of passion and relief. Of a spouse returning from war, years after the war has ended, long since presumed to be dead. As the kiss ends, you embrace each other. You saw each other in a crowd a thousand years ago. And a thousand years from now you will be in crowds together, happily married, with the peace between your realms secured for thousands more.

[shimmersing]

Best Intentions *COMPLETE* Masterpost | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Bonus! Soundtrack @ Spotify

“Ah, Lieutenant!” Erithon swallowed hard against the wave of apprehension that was gathering in his throat as Duke Organa flagged him down. “A most splendid representative of our allies in the Republic. Come!”

He managed not to squirm like a cadet when the Duke clapped him on the shoulder, turning him toward the ballroom’s grand stairway. It wasn’t that he didn’t like parties. This was just a few steps away from the usual military shindig: salute a few times, don’t spill anything on the dress uniform. Nobility wasn’t that far removed from the brass, right? Same kind of handshake deals that meant something a little different to each party, and something else altogether for the people under them. He shrugged inside the stiff sleeves of his jacket, not exactly uncomfortable, just… unfamiliar. It fit fine. But it didn’t feel quite right. Like this whole scene.

“Ah, excellent,” Organa drawled, slowing as a commotion drew everyone’s attention. Flashes sparkled as various holocams swarmed like killiks around the newest arrival. The duke glanced sidelong at Erithon while the soldier craned his neck to get a better view, squinting past the glare.

He knew – obviously; he wasn’t a complete nerf herder – that it would be his Jedi, the same way he knew when a blaster was about to overheat. He just knew. Was that how the Force worked? He didn’t think so, and a question like that seemed so utterly childish he almost laughed aloud. Would she, if he asked? Nah, she wouldn’t. She’d smile and offer him a gentle analogy like that morning, when he’d gathered enough nerve to ask her how he came to be sitting next to her on the transport and not in a body bag.

“Force healing is…” Aitahea had replied, their shoulders nudging companionably as the transport rumbled back toward the palace, “…hard to explain.” Her cheeks had flushed a little, the darting glance from below her lowered lashes full of shy apology. “But I’ll try.” She’d explained her method, which to him didn’t sound all that different from any other medical scanner he’d been in, only a lot more pleasant if his experience was any example.

“My sister on Brentaal is a nurse. Thought it was a little funny when we were younger. We always had medical droids to take care of everything, right?” The Jedi had bobbed her head, eager to hear his next thought. “But after I woke up in a kolto tank the first time alone, I mean, no personnel…” He’d flailed for some explanation of the isolation he’d felt, but it had been hard to recall while her shoulder had been jostling against his. He’d shrugged, grinned, and continued, “Now I think I prefer seeing someone friendly on waking.”

She’d gazed at him with a solemn wonder that had quickened his breath, had him doing everything he could to memorize the ever-so-slight parting of her lips before they curled into a smile.

Just like they did now.

Erithon was so preoccupied with following her gaze that the sudden smile blooming in his direction took his breath away. Again. Aitahea was resplendent. Gossamer enshrouded, bound hair freed from utilitarian plaits and tumbling over her bare shoulders – he throttled back a ridiculous urge to elbow Duke Organa and point out that she had shoulders, and weren’t they nice, too?

Organa smoothed his hands over his lapels, looking pleased with himself, while Erithon struggled to recall his higher vocabulary. “I expect the press will want a holo of our heroes.”

“A holo of-” he began, but she floated over to them right then, luminous and exquisite. It became quite clear who the press would want a holo of. The Jedi offered the duke a generous curtesy, and Erithon found his looming panic - particularly at the words “press” and “holo” - replaced by fascination with the way her earrings brushed against her jawline. Duke Organa caught her hands as she rose and enfolded her in a paternal embrace.

“Thank you, it’s beautiful,” Erithon heard Aitahea whisper to the duke.

“Superb timing, my dear.” The duke’s eyes crinkled merrily around an affectionate smile. He turned to nod at Erithon, adroitly pressing one of Aitahea’s hands into his, then stepped expertly into the background with a final, grand pronouncement: “Our Paladins!”

A cascade of flashes set Erithon’s vision shimmering, but training swiftly rose to meet unfamiliarity, and he managed to remain stoic even as his heart clanged wildly against his ribs. Clever fellow, that Organa, he mused, and with a smirk as bold as he could muster, he deftly hooked his arm under the Jedi’s hand and guided her away from the press. The Duke’s laughter echoed through the hall behind them, but Erithon couldn’t hear it and wouldn’t have cared anyway; he was busy memorizing the sound of her restrained giggle at his shoulder.

“That was a bold move, diplomatically speaking, Lieutenant,” she said playfully, drawing them to a stop to hold him at arm’s length. Flashes sparkled again, unnoticed by either. Her scrutiny didn’t bother him, and it did give him an opportunity to reciprocate.

“You’re… you look amazing,” he breathed, unable to push his awe aside. She could have been a daughter of any of the noble houses on Alderaan, only she couldn’t because none of them were as radiant, as otherworldly. She couldn’t, because even without her lightsaber (that he could tell, anyway), she remained a veritable force of nature. Unexplainable and irreplaceable, flushed cheeks and wide eyes and little white flowers caught up in her hair. Because when he’d said something as trite as ‘you look amazing’ her eyes lit up like she’d never heard anyone say it before this.

“Pardon me, Master Jedi? Lieutenant?” A fidgeting Haley Organa interrupted as politely as possible, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “We’re ready for you.”

Erithon blinked, overwhelmed with the sudden lurching feeling that he hadn’t studied for a test. Hadn’t he just deftly navigated them out of this nonsense? “For…us?”

Before the young page’s nervousness could escalate to panic, Aitahea intervened: “An introduction. The formal presentation. It’s mostly for the holonet, so they can put a name with your holo, and hopefully spell it correctly.” Her brows lowered, and he caught a glimpse of solemn concern behind her light tone. “It shouldn’t be unlike one of your military events.”

He inclined his head, discomfort ebbing away. He didn’t think it was a Jedi thing, not this time. “Smile, but not too much.”

“Just so,” she replied softly, reaching up to brush away some unseen particle from his collar. He straightened, willing his face back into a mask of quiet confidence. Her own features settled into practiced serenity, but her eyes, fixed on his, danced.

Just another kind of battlefield.

[BREAK HERE]

“Republic Lieutenant Erithon Zale of Havoc Squad and Master Aitahea Daviin of the Jedi Order.”

The cluster of press at the foot of the grand stair disappeared momentarily behind the coruscation of flashes. Beyond them Aitahea briefly glimpsed, through the sea of elaborate costume and outlandish headwear, the dancers at the center of the hall. Over the buzz of voices, she could hear the notes of a familiar waltz. Haley Organa gave her a relieved smile as he slipped away to his next charges, leaving the Jedi and the soldier to descend the gauntlet together. Beneath her hand, Erithon’s arm was reassuringly steady.

Uncertainty flickered in his eyes only once they reached the last stair and the press drew close again. Erithon looked down, one brow raised in a wordless plea: What now? Aitahea laughed and nudged him toward a knot of familiar faces.

“Guess we made an entrance,” he admitted, sparing a last glance toward the lingering press, and turned toward Elara Dorne and Arik Jorgan, both in military dress like their commander, and a beaming Brant Sonn. “Hey, we know them.”

They exchanged greetings; the more formal commentary was punctuated with the chatter of battlefield allies good-naturedly enjoying each other’s company. Aitahea listened to the companions, struggling to keep her eyes on the others and not so frequently on Erithon. Grasping rather tenaciously to his arm was helping but had to be forsaken well too soon for her preference when Tharan and Holliday approached, asking that the Jedi make introductions for them, it wouldn’t take but a moment.

“Of course,” Aitahea agreed, all politeness, turning back to Erithon to excuse herself. He winked at her and caught her free hand in a quick squeeze when she began to pull away. Aitahea found herself suddenly and agreeably conscious that neither of their finery required gloves. His hands were warm.

“Hurry back,” he said, eyes crinkling with mirth, and Aitahea nearly forgot to let go before being ushered away by a harassed-looking Tharan.

‘Hurry’ became three different conversations with seven different nobles from at least two houses and a science corporation headquartered on Organa lands. At last, Aitahea was finally able to withdraw from the conversation, wandering over to where dancers traded partners and minced steps rather than words or plans. It was one of her favorite court dances, learned and practiced enough in her youth that even now she felt muscles tensing for steps she hadn’t taken in years. Orderly and precise, patterns were traced and rewritten, dancers finding each other again, over and over.

“Thought I’d find you here.”

Aitahea was so entranced that she startled when Erithon spoke at her shoulder and laughed a little breathlessly. “Forgive me, I was so preoccupied with the dancers.” He offered her his arm and another charming grin, and she accepted, grateful that only she knew how an adolescent glee had settled so comfortably under her superficial calm. “I haven’t heard this since I was a girl – an initiate, in the enclave, that is.” She winced at her rambling explanation.

“Pretty.” He hadn’t seemed to notice her discomfort, occupied with carefully watching as the dancers divided, exchanged partners for a cursory bow, then returned to join hands. “Do you know the dance, too?”

She nodded. Well, if you’re going to be preposterously transparent may as well carry on, she thought vehemently, but her voice and expression remained blithe. “It’s traditional on Alderaan. Are you familiar with it?”

He grimaced at the dancers, chagrin drawing his brows low. “Um, no. But,” he offered cautiously, “I’m reasonably good at following orders. And you’ve kept me from embarrassing myself so far.”

“I’ve never… I haven’t in years, I don’t know if I can recall all…” Aitahea focused determinedly on his eyes while she tried to hold fast the wild fluttering in her chest, something delicate and precious that had lingered, and after a moment she found she liked it there simply fine. She inhaled slowly, then asked, “You’re certain?”

“I trust you.”

~

Erithon had made his mind up to ask if she wanted to dance before he’d even spotted her. He might not have any empathic sensibilities, but he’d watched her seek out the dancers even while they were walking down the grand stairs. Even he could tell she’d wanted to be out there, and if he could just manage to stay on his feet long enough to give her the chance, he’d handle any ribbing from his crew later. She deserved it.

“Listen,” she murmured over her shoulder as they waited, poised at the edge of the dance floor. “Can you hear the rhythm? One, two, three?”

“Mmhmm.” He nodded, swallowing hard when she stepped back against him. “Got it.” He shifted, hovering at her side, and hoping his heart wasn’t thumping in her ear like it felt like it had to be. “I think.”

Humming her amusement, she turned herself expertly into his arms and placed her left hand in his while she raised their right hands to her shoulder, fingers entwined. “Just start walking in time with the music.” She tapped a finger into his left palm. “Begin with your left.”

He took a breath and nodded. The dance was stately but leisurely, giving Erithon plenty of time to hear the next step whispered over Aitahea’s shoulder. She made it effortless, her body easy to follow, featherlight touches guiding his motions.

Good thing that was all he had time to focus on.

After a few minutes of mostly successful instruction, Aitahea uttered a warning about the impending partner change. Erithon swallowed hard, nodded, and next thing he knew, he was tripping over the shoes of an unfortunate noblewoman with what looked like an entire miniature thranta nest perched precariously on a tower of powdered curls. Thankfully, the exchange ended quickly and Erithon was relieved to have Aitahea guiding him once again.

“I didn’t think anyone in the whole Core was still powdering their hair,” the Jedi bubbled unexpectedly into his ear. He laughed a little too loud and swept her gratefully – though perhaps a little too enthusiastically – back into the progression. He liked this part best, he’d quickly discovered. The leader – his role apparent, though he might have disagreed technically – picked up their partner for a little lift and turn. Aitahea had warned him verbally the first time, but the second time he’d wrapped his hands around her waist he’d been too busy looking into her eyes and had missed the lift.

Erithon was determined. This round he got everything perfect: an effortless lift gave him a few moments to enjoy when her eyes widened and smile bloomed. If he put her down a second or two late, she didn’t seem to mind.

The song wasn’t quite through when Aitahea’s steps slowed, drifting out of the pattern. Erithon tensed, an arm already around her waist, and opened his mouth to ask if she was all right when she stumbled. He caught her easily; she was breathing much harder than one should be for a Jedi in fighting form – and the shadows beneath her eyes seemed suddenly more pronounced.

Alarm buzzed through him. “Are you okay?” She still had her feet under her, so he kept hold of one of her hands and curled the other arm securely around her waist. Just in case.

“Yes!” she exhaled quickly, leaning into him, and added a breathy laugh. “Perhaps we should get some air?”

“Here, come on.” Guiding her past guards in Organa livery, the terrace appeared mercifully empty while the festivities continued inside. Erithon led Aitahea to one of the benches by an elbow, easing her down first before sitting beside her, keenly aware of his now-empty arms. “Better?”

“Much, thank you,” she replied, swiping at her hairline with the back of one hand before she lifted her face to smile at him. “That was lovely. I’m so sorry it had to end that way, and so soon.”

“Me too.” He smiled, unexpectedly pleased with her response. “You learned that here, as a kid?”

She shifted, easing back against the stone. “Yes.” She glanced sidelong at him, a droll smile playing across her lips. “No doubt the Duke has already regaled with you with mortifying stories from my youth.”

“He didn’t get to that,” Erithon said with a roguish wink. “Not that I’d believe a word of it, of course.” Erithon frowned back at her, worry wrinkling his brow. “You look tired.”

She sighed noncommittally and closed her eyes, leaning back against the cool stone behind them. Underneath the surface flush, she was still pale, almost sallow. When she opened her eyes again, the glitter in them was past the dazzle of a party and looking almost feverish.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” Erithon shifted uneasily as the silence stretched out, trying not to guess at her silence and just leave her some space to breathe.

“I am… carrying a burden.” She paused, twisting her fingers while she seemed to search for words. “I’m shielding several masters who were infected with a Force plague, standing between them and madness, perhaps worse. Even my own master…” She trailed off, staring into her hands, dropping them to rest open in her lap.

“Anything I can do?” He meant anything. He’d face down more Sith, however many it took to disengage her from this burden and give her some peace. Anything.

Aitahea looked at him with eyes suddenly glittering with tears; her expression nearly stopped his heart. Her voice was a whisper, her eyes dancing again. “Erithon…” Her focus shifted, gaze flickering past him just as Erithon himself caught the sound of approaching footfalls. He ground his teeth to keep from muttering the curse he caught grumbling in his throat, instead giving Aitahea a bemused grimace as he rose and offered her a hand.

The Jedi was a portrait of ethereal serenity again, eyes that only moments before had shone with desperate anguish had shuttered, hiding the woman who’d whispered his name like a plea, leaving only the Jedi, glorious as she was, incandescent but incomplete.

“Ah, Master Jedi, I’ve been hoping to track you down all evening. I’m Hallam Organa, head of House Organa’s diplomatic corps.” The broad fellow made a brief bow, then indicated his companion. “This is my younger, more handsome brother, Lew.”

Lew Organa gave his brother an indulgent look. “Please, Hallam. You do yourself an injustice.” His lips twitched. “Your age gives you a stately difference.”

“My lords, it’s an honor to make your acquaintance,” she replied, eyes crinkling with amusement, then turned to Erithon. “Allow me to introduce Lieutenant Erithon Zale of the Republic, commander of Havoc Squad.”

“Ah, the liberator of the Spears! What an opportunity, having our newest Paladins side by side, such fine company!” Hallam exclaimed, offering Erithon a deep bow that Lew also made. Erithon glanced at Aitahea, uncertain how to respond, and she inclined her head, giving him an encouraging smile. He copied the motion, appreciative but still a bit mystified by all the pomp and circumstance.

Rising, Hallam returned his attention pointedly to Aitahea. “Master Jedi, I’ve been told you’re seeking Master Sidonie Garen.”

She hovered close to Erithon’s side, her hand curled around his arm. “It’s urgent that I speak with Master Sidonie as soon as possible.”

“You just missed her, I’m afraid. She’s already left for the peace summit,” Hallam explained. “A peace summit on Alderaan! Imagine that!” He slapped his thigh, shaking his head incredulously at Lew, who nodded thoughtfully in response.

Erithon watched Aitahea’s lips thin almost imperceptibly, but the next moment she was tilting her head, tranquil and erudite. “Indeed. Can you put me in contact with her?” Erithon could feel her tensing, fingers tightening on his sleeve. Master Sidonie must be one of the infected Jedi masters she’d mentioned a few moments ago.

“I can call her, certainly.” Hallam flicked another glance at Erithon, considering. “The location of the summit is a secret for obvious reasons, but I’m sure she’d welcome your assistance. Meet us first thing tomorrow morning, diplomacy wing?”

He felt her shudder, but she nodded affirmation. “Thank you, my lord, the Council will be eager to hear any updates.”

~

Their shoulders brushed again and again as they walked, sending her heart skipping every time. He hadn’t let her go further than arm’s reach since she’d stumbled out of the dance progression, nor as they wandered back to their suites after finishing the stilted conversation with Hallam and Lew Organa.

She slowed, eyes flickering to the nearby door of his suite, then back across the hall to her own door before she turned to face him. “We’re here.”

“Right.” He caught up the hand she’d left lingering on his sleeve and offered one of those extraordinary lopsided smiles. “I’m glad we found each other again.”

She returned the expression with delight. “As am I. Thank you for…” She began the elaborate thank-you she’d begun contriving as they’d walked back to the guest wing, but when he reached up with his free hand, twining one of her loose curls around a finger, every word fled her all at once. The silence between her heartbeats was impossibly sustained, well more than enough time for him to notice her gaze lingering on his mouth. When he drew closer still and smoothed his thumb over the curve of her cheek, she lost track of them entirely.

“Do you think we’ll ever dream of each other again, like Taris?” he asked, low and earnest.

Some resolve she’d fashioned in the wake of their dearly-won victory, Yuon’s coy encouragement, and the bravado of familiar surroundings fractured at his innocent question. The connection that often lingered after healing blazed with unfamiliar sensations that she hadn’t the strength to unravel now. Even without the physical contact, even with all her practiced resolve and Jedi training, his emotions wound around and through her, as impossible for her to ignore or deny as a starship could the pull of a gravity well. Waiting for her answer had allowed him plenty of time to sweetly tilt her face up to his.

With an austere resolve she was distantly surprised to find intact, she pressed a hand to his chest, where not long ago she’d smoothed her palm over his bare skin in the wake of the most desperate healing she’d ever undertaken. Aitahea answered, her whisper breaking on a last fragment of jagged verity: “I never stopped.”

She closed her eyes against the onslaught of overwhelming, unshielded, achingly reciprocated need, and pushed him away. She bit down hard on the soft sound of loss that threatened to escape her throat when he jolted back, the sudden distress and regret that tolled through her – no, him – no. Through them both. She struggled to inhale a tremulous breath.

When she could bear to open her eyes again, Erithon looked physically pained, his confusion and concern shearing through her own exhausted disappointment. He’d stepped back, hands open and empty, doubt beginning to tarnish the bright threads that had encircled them. “That was out of line, I’m sorry.”

“No, I was… You – I’m not –” Aitahea pressed her lips together hard to keep them from trembling, but it couldn’t stop the stinging in her eyes, the ache in her chest. “I’m sorry.”

“No. No.” He shook his head, vehement. “Don’t be. Please.” Erithon hesitated, trying to work up a friendly grin in contrast to his stiff posture, but only managed a wan quirk of his lips. “I told you on Taris that we’d do something better.”

She exhaled in a rush and allowed a smile to flutter across her face. It didn’t reach her eyes. “Yes, you did. Thank you.” Better! It was wonderful. Too wonderful. I never wanted to stop. We should have finished the song. “I should… retire for the night… if I’m to pick up Master Sidonie’s trail tomorrow.” She glanced toward her door, promising the solace of isolation and hopefully sleep. She was exhausted, utterly, but couldn’t resist one last watery smile. “Thank you, Erithon.”

His usual ebullient charm at least marginally recovered, he offered her a bow as crisp and practiced as any noble in the castle. “Goodnight, Aitahea.”

~

Aitahea waited for the door lock to engage before she sank back against it, hands over her face, about to release the pent-up sob clawing at the back of her throat.

On the suite’s balcony, Qyzen Fess shifted carefully but deliberately, his armor creaking in the silence. The door rattled noisily as she flattened against it in disbelief, reaching for a lightsaber that was not there. Of course not.

“Apologize if I startle you, Herald.”

Disquieted by her own panic, Aitahea bit back an uncharacteristically sharp retort, closing her eyes to draw a calming breath in its place. After releasing it, Aitahea raised a carefully neutral face to her friend. “I’m sorry, Qyzen, I wasn’t expecting you. Well done, you successfully snuck up on a Jedi.”

“Was not aware of such challenge.”

She sighed. “An attempt at a joke, Qyzen. A failed attempt, apparently. To add to the rest I’ve made this mission.” Aitahea sank gratefully into an overstuffed chair, letting the beautiful but unfamiliar shoes slip off her suddenly aching feet. “What changed your mind about the castle?”

“Mind not changed. Will return to ship after speaking.” Qyzen hovered near the balcony doors, clearly uncomfortable and anxious to depart. “Must see how Scorekeeper’s Herald fares.”

Aitahea tenaciously schooled her expression to serene but was unable to shake the tendrils of failure and regret that clung like shadows. “Tired, Qyzen. Thank you for checking.”

“Herald will rest.” Aitahea couldn’t decide if that was a question or suggestion, but either way, she agreed.

“Yes.”

AN: It's been such a journey to get here, to this chapter in particular that I’ve been imagining for such a long time. I’ve been stuck here since 2020; I’m so glad you’re still here with me. With us, I suppose. Enjoy. May the Force be with us all. Thank you.

Thank you to the ever-present, dependable, and brilliant Taraum for beta-reading.

Best Intentions *COMPLETE* Masterpost | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Bonus! Soundtrack @ Spotify

[heyyyharry]

Chapter 6: Rooftop and Champagne

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Stay Mine)

…in which Harry gets nominated for an Oscar, but he wants to celebrate Y/N’s good news instead.

Word count: 5k

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N, (4-year age gap).

Wattpad link

Let me know what you think!!!

The song Harry sang to Bambi: Come Here by Kat Bloom

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Y/N returned to her flat the next morning and ran into Blake. He had just come back from his morning run, was about to open his door when he saw her, and his expression closed up as he pressed his lips into a small smile.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning.” She smiled back and pulled out her key. It was hard to act normal after their conversation a few nights ago. They hadn’t spoken since, and she had stopped expecting the good news from him. Laura Hilfgard had probably thrown her manuscript in the trash, and the sad part was she wasn’t even upset as she was already used to rejections.

“Can we talk?” Blake spoke as she opened her door.

She turned around, holding her breath. “S-Sure. What is it?”

A corner of his mouth turned up as a way to tell her, “you know what it is,” but she was too embarrassed, she breathed out a laugh and wrapped her arms around herself. She couldn’t stop thinking about how she had overreacted the other night, and she’d rather have him never speak to her again than talk about it now.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, to her surprise. “I hope you’re not mad at me.”

“I’m not mad at you.”

“You’re not?”

“No.” She licked her lip and let out a soft breath. “And I’m not moving in with Harry either.” Seeing his eyes go round, she didn’t want to give him the wrong idea so she had to add, “we’ve decided that this isn’t the right time, but it’s definitely something we both want in the future.”

“That’s good. I’m glad you’re happy.” He jammed his hands in his pockets as she took a deep breath with a beam on her face.

“Thank you,” she said, noticing his reluctance.

He cleared his throat, raising a finger like he finally remembered something and patting his pockets to look for his phone. She had a feeling that she knew what he was about to show her. She just didn’t want to get her hopes up.

Staring at his fingers, Y/N didn’t realise she wasn’t breathing properly as she saw him unlock his phone and open his messages.

“Here. Read it yourself.” He gave the phone to her. She hesitantly took it and saw the text delivered at 8 PM last night when she was at dinner with Harry.

Loved your friend’s story. Will contact her soon! :)

Her heart skipped a beat as she gasped and covered her mouth. Blake let out a chuckle while she was still speechless. “I already gave Laura your number so don’t turn off your pho--”

Y/N didn’t let him finish as she gave him a full bear hug, the first one they had shared in three years. It startled him at first but he hugged her back in less than a second. If she hadn’t pulled away, he probably wouldn’t either. But she did let go of him to grip his phone with both hands, and while she was smiling at the message, he was smiling at her.

“I have to tell Harry!” she said, turning his smile into a frown. “Should I tell Harry now or should I wait until Laura contacts me?”

Blake was about to answer when she cut him off, “you’re right! I should wait until it’s official! She could change her mind at the last minute.” She breathed through her mouth, clutching the phone to her chest. “Oh God, I’m so happy!”

“I could tell.” He chuckled.

“Thank you so much! Just tell me what you want and I’ll buy it for you as a gift.”

“You don’t have to buy me anything.”

“Nonsense!” She scoffed as her face screwed up. “I have to repay you somehow!”

“Well, you could buy me dinner?”

“Deal!”

“Really?” He furrowed his eyebrows, half surprised, half elated.

“I’m gonna tell Celine and Amala now. See you later!”

“Y/N, wait! My phone.”

“Oh, sorry!” Y/N rolled her eyes, laughing nervously as she returned his phone and rushed into her flat. The door was shut, and Blake was left in the hallway with a large grin on his face.

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With all the crazy things happening lately, Harry had completely forgotten the day of the big announcement he’d been waiting for since months ago. He had been in the shower when he received the news and almost ignored the call, but thankfully his manager had kept blowing up his phone.

When he heard his name, ‘Oscar nomination’, and ‘Best Actor’ in the same sentence, his heart almost exploded. He shouted and jumped on the bed and started bouncing in his bathrobe like a little boy. He wouldn’t have cared if someone had seen him like that. For fuck’s sake, he just got his first Oscar nomination at twenty-five!

He was over the moon, and the first person he decided to call was his mum. It would’ve been Gemma if they hadn’t just argued the previous night, but he decided to shake it off and not be sad on this wonderful day. He talked to his mum for almost an hour and could have gone on for much longer than that, but he must hang up to break the news to his girlfriend in person.

He was eager to leave the house and almost hit a street lamp when his Ferrari swerved around a slower car. The driver cursed at him, and he just burst out laughing like a crazy person.

He parked his car on the side of the road, adrenaline pumping in his veins as he ran into the building and climbed to the fifth floor without breaking a sweat. He was panting heavily, yet still smiling from ear to ear as he banged on her door, shouting, “Bambi! Bambi!”

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“Bambi! Bambi!”

“What? What is it?” The little girl looked up as Harry tackled her to the floor, almost suffocating her with his violent hug.

“I got it, Bambi, I got it!”

“Got what?!” She pushed him off, annoyed and curious at the same time.

“The lead in the school play! I’m Romeo in Romeo and Juliet!” His face lit up as he took her hands and held them against his chest. “Oh, Juliet, I love you so much, let’s die together!”

“That’s not--”

“I know, I’m just messing with you.” He laughed and gently knocked on her forehead.

She pulled away, rubbing the spot and raising an eyebrow questioningly. “Who’s gonna be Juliet?”

“Some girl I don’t know, but who cares? Isn’t this great?”

“I care!” Y/N got up to sit on her heels, fingers pinching her thighs. “Romeo and Juliet kiss! You’re gonna lose your first kiss to some girl you don’t know, Harry!”

Her reaction was priceless. Harry didn’t know how she managed to look angry and sad and embarrassed at the same time, but he thought it was adorable as he cupped her cheeks and pinched them together, making her lips pucker up.

“I’m not kissing any girl, Bambi,” he said as she pushed him away. “We’re not gonna do the kissing scene because our drama teacher thinks it’s inappropriate. I have no idea why.”

“I agree with your drama teacher!” she said as her eyes lit up and she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Congratulations, Harry! You got your first acting role!”

“Aww, Bambi.” He shut his eyes and wrapped his arms around her. “What would I do without you?”

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“Har--”

Harry grabbed Y/N’s face before she could finish his name and silenced her with a passionate kiss. She was still startled when he let her go, but he didn’t want to break the news immediately, he wanted her to guess. It only took a second for her eyes to go wide.

“They told you, didn’t they?!” she asked, making him brighten.

“Yeah, I just got the phone call!”

“Oh God, I told them not to tell you before I do!”

Wait, what?

Y/N let out a heavy breath as she held his hands. “Fuck Cece and Amala for ruining the surprise, but it’s official, babe.”

What is official? Wait, what is happening?

“Laura Hilfgard called and...I’m her new client!”

“Shit, babe, really?!” His mouth fell open, he was laughing uncontrollably. “That’s great! So it’s official?!”

“It’s official!” She squealed, hugging his neck.

For a second, Harry was too happy to think about his big news, but as soon as they pulled apart, he instantly remembered the reason he was there in the first place. Half of him wanted to tell her, the other half didn’t. But on second thought, he received stupid awards all the time; an Oscar nomination wouldn’t change his life, but a book deal would definitely change hers.

“You know what? Let’s celebrate!” he said and opened his hand. “Give me your phone.”

“What? Why?”

“Just give me your phone.”

Though confused, Y/N still pulled out her phone and placed it on his palm. He turned it off and she frantically tried to grab it but he was quick to put it in his pocket.

“What are you doing?! I need to call my dad.”

“I’ll let you call your dad after our date.” Because he couldn’t let her find out about his nomination online.

“We’re going on a date?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Y/N chuckled as he circled his arms around her waist, playfully biting his lips. “I may or may not have brought a bottle of champagne to take you to a rooftop so we could celebrate your good news.”

“You’re joking.”

“Do I not seem like the most romantic boyfriend in the world?” He leaned in and smeared his mouth over hers, making her giggle and push him back a bit to hold his face.

“I love you so much,” she said.

“I love you more,” he said back before kissing her passionately.

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“Stand tall! Romeo doesn’t slouch!”

Harry straightened as Y/N walked around him with her hands behind her back like a military commander observing her subordinate. “Now I wanna hear you say your lines. You have to convince me that you’re Romeo, all right?”

Harry cleared his throat so he could fully transform into the famous lovesick character. With a deep breath, he began, “see how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O that I were a glove upon that hand. That I might touch that cheek! “

He playfully touched her cheek and she slapped his fingers away, trying not to guffaw.

“Was I good?”

“Very good.” She nodded proudly. “But you have to be serious and stop fooling around like that.”

The boy gave a shrug. “Well, I’m only fooling around with you. I’m always serious at the actual rehearsals.”

“Oh, do you prefer the actual Juliet then.” She rolled her eyes and looked away, pouting in annoyance. He wasn’t sure if she was really jealous or just simply upset because he wasn’t serious with her; either way, it was so funny.

He took a deep breath and got down on one knee, extending his hand, leaving her confused. “May I dance with you, lady Juliet?”

“That line is not in the play.”

“Shh!” He put a finger to her lips. “Don’t speak, my lady. Dance with me!”

“Harry!” Y/N burst out laughing as the boy grabbed her hands and started swaying her around the treehouse. They kept stepping on each other’s feet, but at least they were having fun.

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Harry was breathless as he raced Y/N up the stairs, shouting at her to slow down and wait for him but she was too excited to listen. The last time they were there for her twentieth birthday, the building had been under construction, and now it was a residential building where actual people lived. They would have gone insane if they had found out they were in the same building with Harry Styles. However, since Niall’s uncle owned the whole place, Harry managed to sneak her in without anyone knowing, and the building management had even allowed them to have the entire rooftop for themselves.

Y/N pushed the heavy metal door open and stepped outside, meeting a cold breeze which blew right through her thin shirt. She waited for Harry to catch up, took his hand and pulled him with her.

“This is so cool!” she screamed at the pedestrians below. They looked like ants from where she stood. Seeing the look of elation of her face with wind blowing in her hair made Harry’s heart feel a little jumpy.

They spotted an old couch someone had discarded and moved it to the perfect spot to sit and watch the sunset together. Last time, it was already dark when they came up. They had never watched the sun go down from a rooftop before so both were as thrilled as little children going to the movie for the first time.

They admired the fiery red horizon lit by the blood-poured sun and imagined themselves being ten years younger and watching the same scenery from their little treehouse. Now the view below them was an enormous city with wide-stretched and never-ending roads instead of their own backyards and the roofs of their neighbours’ houses.

They sat in silence until the warm bronze sunlight was swallowed by the horizon. The sky was finally engulfed in darkness. A beautiful and calming darkness that seemed to be made just for them. They popped the bottle and sat side by side, with her head on his shoulder as they enjoyed good champagne and the breathtaking view of London after sundown.

“We’ve gone so far since our first date on this roof, haven’t we?” he asked, making her pull away.

“That wasn’t our first date.”

“It was to me.” He put a hand on her neck, smiling softly. “I was falling for you then.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

Her eyelids fluttered as she leaned in closer, brushing her lips against his before kissing him lightly.

“You kissed me for the first time that night,” she whispered while holding his affectionate gaze.

He nodded. “I did.”

“And I stayed awake all night thinking about it.”

“You did?”

“I did.” She rested her cheek on his shoulder and looked up. “I was afraid that if I fell asleep and woke up, it would all be a dream, and I would never get to kiss you again.”

“Well, here we are.”

“Here we are.”

Giving a small smile, Harry grabbed her face and leaned in for a full-on, opened-mouthed kiss. He slid his tongue against hers, smirking as she fisted his shirt and whimpered his name which sounded so heavenly.

He cupped her neck to deepen the kiss before grabbing her waist and pulling her to his lap, but she refused to straddle him and got up, leaving him gasping for air. He shoved his fingers into his hair and groaned loudly as she laughed and took his other hand, pulling him up.

He got on his feet, letting her guide his hands to her waist but as she started searching in his pockets for their phones, he snatched her wrist, clicking his tongue. “Nuh-uh, I don’t think so, kid.”

“I’m not gonna check my phone. I just want to put on some music!”

“I can sing for us. I’m a great singer.” He snorted and started swaying them slowly. “Any requests?”

She giggled, her head resting on his chest. “How about a song that reminds you of me?”

“I have a whole playlist. How do I choose only one?”

As she only gave him a shrug, he inhaled deeply and pulled her back in. He liked how close they were and made sure to leave no space between them as they slow-danced to the sound of the wind, and soon to his gentle singing voice.

“There's a wind that blows in from the north. And it says that loving takes this course. Come here. Come here.”

She moved quietly in his arms as the champagne pulsated through their veins, casting a warm glow upon them as if they were dancing in an empty ballroom without a roof.

“No, I'm not impossible to touch. I have never wanted you so much. Come here. Come here,” he continued signing, allowing her to feel the urgent rhythm of his heart as he drew her even closer. “Have I never laid down by your side. Baby, let's forget about this pride. Come here. Come here.”

In no hurry, he took pleasure in being close to her and knowing they had no boundaries between them during or after this dance. He held her chin and gently lifted her face up to see her eyes in the soft glow of the night city. He loved the smell of her hair and the way her cool skin grew warm under his touch.

“Well, I'm in no hurry. You don't have to run away this time. I know you're timid. But it's gonna be all right this time.”

Their foreheads rested against each other as their bodies swayed slowly 'round and 'round. He found himself falling again for her mesmerising eyes.

“There's a wind that blows in from the north. And it says that loving takes this course. Come here. Come here.”

All he could think about at that moment was that he loved her. And he thought--No, he knew. He knew he wanted to marry her. One day. One day he would.

“Another song, please?” Her voice pulled him back to reality. He didn’t answer and also stopped dancing as he squeezed her hands against his chest.

“Can I just say I’m very proud of you?” he uttered, making her smile. “You’re one of the most hard-working people I’ve known. You have no idea how happy I am right now.”

“Aww.” She sighed and tiptoed to peck his lips. “I wouldn’t have any of this if it wasn’t for you.”

“That’s not true. You’ve done this all by yourself, kid.”

She shook her head, smiling. “The first story I wrote was about you. And all the stories I’ve written since were inspired by you. I didn’t have friends before I met you, and I became friends with Cece thanks to you, so...” She chuckled, chewing on the corner of her lips. “You are, by far, the worst and the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

“Oh God.” He tossed his head back and laughed. “Why did you tell me that? Now I’m sad and happy at the same time.”

“As you should be.” She wrinkled her nose and draped her arms over his shoulders.

He sucked his lips into his mouth, staring at her intensely as he tried to decide on what to say next. Knowing him too well, she didn’t break their eye contact and stayed patient. What she didn’t expect was him pulling away and getting down on one knee. Her face was pale as she turned paralysed. “Harry?”

“Bambi, will you...” He took in a long breath for suspense, knowing she would kill him afterwards but it’d be worth it. “Will you be my date to the Oscars?”

“W-What?”

“I got nominated for Best Act--”

“HOLY SHIT!” She jumped right on top of him. He landed on his back, groaning in pain while laughing hysterically as she sat on his stomach and showered his face with hurried kisses.

“I can’t believe it! When--When did you find out?”

The funny look on his face made her gasp, “you lying motherfuc--”

He shut her up with a kiss that left her breathless when he finally pulled away.

“I’m gonna have to punish you later,” she said against his mouth, making him whine.

“Noooo! Why later?”

“I mean, I would suck your dick now if you weren’t famous, babe.”

“Didn’t stop you many times before.”

She scoffed and swatted his chest for the joke. “Well, you’re an Oscar nominee now. Time has changed!”

“So, will I get my dick sucked after the party then?”

“What party?” Y/N froze, her fingers tightened in his hair as he gave a suppressed laugh at the look on her face.

“I forgot to tell you there’s a party happening at my house right now.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She got up quickly and kicked his leg. “Pick up your glass and the bottle. We have to get there now!”

“Bambi, hold on!”

“People are expecting you! I won’t suck your dick if you don’t hurry up!”

“Okay, okay, coming!”

Harry was in hysterics as he chased her back to the door. God, he loved her. He really loved her.

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Harry ignored the looks the others were giving him as he walked around in his Romeo costume just three minutes before showtime. He found Y/N standing by herself at the entrance and called out, “Bambi!”

“Harry!” She rushed up to him. “What are you doing out here?”

“I’m so glad you made it.” He hugged her tightly and pulled back, holding her shoulders. “I thought you were grounded.”

“Well, I am but my parents didn’t see me sneak out.” She gave a shrug and changed the subject, “I’m so sorry that your family cannot make it.”

“Don’t be.” He shrugged. “I mean, it sucks that Gemma broke her arm but I understand that mum has to be in the hospital with her.”

“Well, I’m here now so you must do your best because I’m gonna be judging you, and that girl who plays your love interest.”

Harry chuckled and stroked her head one last time before running backstage so the play could begin.

This is just like one of those rehearsals, he told himself, but instead of acting in front of empty rows of chairs, there’s a real audience watching you.

His heart was beating like a drum as the teacher announced he was up next.

Your Bambi is here, he sucked in a breath, she’s here, and everything is fine...

The audience applauded as a spotlight followed Harry to the centre of the stage. He started exchanging lines with the kid who played Romeo’s cousin Benvolio. Even that kid could tell Harry was nervous, so he purposely said his lines slower to give Harry more time to relax and get used to being on stage.

Harry was sweating through his costume, thinking everyone could see what a terrible choice he was for Romeo and would start booing him soon enough.

Confidence, Styles! said the voice inside his head as he remembered Bambi’s words and stood straight, because ‘Romeo doesn’t slouch.’

Harry was so nervous he could hear his blood pumping through his veins. He stole a quick glance at where Y/N sat in the audience, hoping to see her smile which he knew would make him feel much better.

But she wasn’t the only one he saw. There was also his mum and his sister with her arm in a white cast. Gemma gave him a thumb up and Anne looked so proud of him. The boy was so elated he was glued to the spot until his Bambi waved her hand to remind him to concentrate.

“In love?” his co-star asked.

“Out.”

“Of love?”

“Out of her favour, where I am in love.” Harry’s face showed genuine distress that made the audience clap and cheer.

Though the boy managed to stay in character, he was smiling so wide inside. He didn’t care if he would pull this off or be the worst Romeo to ever been on stage; he just knew that he was having fun and his family was all there to see it.

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.

Harry arrived at the party in his nice car, holding hands with the love of his life, and was welcomed with thunderous applause by the people he’d admired his whole life. He felt as if he’d achieved every single goal in his life in one day, and yet, something was still missing.

Fuck it, he thought as he poured another drink down his throat. It was supposed to be the best night of his life, and nothing could stop him from drinking and dancing until morning. He would have a good time at his party, with or without his sister’s presence.

Y/N handed him a glass of water which he accepted but put on a table and put his arm around her. She asked what he was doing when he suddenly pulled her to the spiral staircase and climbed a few steps to stand taller than everyone else.

He whistled to get everyone’s attention, and the music stopped, all eyes fell on him. At this point, he was somewhat tipsy so all the guests, including his girl, expected him to give a silly speech to thank everyone for coming.

“Thank you for coming, everyone!” he said drunkenly, making Y/N snort and bury her face into her palm. Still holding her hand, he lifted the invisible glass in his other hand and began his toast, “I just wanna let you know that my girlfriend is about to be a best-selling author and I’m very proud of her! Her name is Bambi--I mean, Y/Ndora!”

“Get down!” Y/N laughed with her mouth and eyes wide open as she pulled him back to her side while everyone was clapping for them. She waited for the guests to start minding their own business and turned back to him. Though annoyed, she was looking at him fondly. “What the hell was that?”

“They need to know this is your night!”

“Jesus,” she muttered into her palm. “You’re lucky I love you, dumbass.”

“Yes, it’s me. Your dumbass.” He giggled like a little boy and tucked his flushed face into her neck. “Hmm...You smell so good. Let’s find a room.”

“Hold on.” She gripped his shoulders to push him away, not letting him whine about it. “Wait here for me, I’ll be right back.”

“No, Bambi, stay.”

“Be a good boy and I’ll be right back, I promise,” she said before kissing his forehead and making him sit on the bottom stair. He didn’t know where she’d gone, but he wanted to be her good boy so he stayed there like a little puppy and waited for her to come back.

As he was getting bored, he started counting his fingers and recounted them as if new ones had grown when he wasn’t paying attention. When a person towered over him, he almost didn’t notice until he heard her voice.

“Are you missing me?”

He lifted his face, his red eyes widened. “Gemma!”

Gemma rolled her eyes as her brother stood up and held her tightly in his arms. Still, she cracked a smirk and rested her hands on his back, her chin on his shoulder.

“I’m only here for the party. I’ll be mad at you again tomorrow,” she said, making him chuckle.

“I know, I know.” He nodded fast. “I’m just happy that you’re here.”

.

.

.

The first person Isaac saw when he arrived at the party was Y/N. They made eye contact from across the room, and her smile slipped at once. He expected nothing but trouble when she left Harry on the staircase and made her way towards him, but he had to keep his cool otherwise he would screw up again.

He sucked in a deep breath, trying to recall the things he wanted to say which he’d prepared in the car, but his head was completely empty as she approached.

“Hey, congrat--”

“Be honest!” She pointed a finger to his face. “Did you give Emilia Gemma’s number?”

“Y-Yes.” He swallowed hard. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course not! Why did you do that, Isaac?!”

“I’m--I’m sorry. Emilia told me she wanted to call Gemma herself. She thought it’d be a better idea if she was the one who reached out instead of Harry.”

Y/N let out a sharp breath as she put both hands on her hips. “Well, thanks to you both now Gemma is angry at Harry.”

Isaac stuck out his bottom lip, pointing over her shoulder. “She doesn’t look very angry to me.”

Y/N turned around, tongue-tied when she saw Gemma and Harry sharing a hug. She quickly turned back to Isaac, completely baffled. “Did you bring her here?!”

“I wish I had.” He lifted his shoulders in a half-shrug. “Maybe if I had you wouldn’t be mad at me.”

“You’re damn right!” She huffed and shot him a glare. “Just stay out of their family drama next time, please. I know you have feelings for Emilia--”

“I don’t.”

“--but stop trying to be her hero. You’re going to ruin everything and I don’t--” She slapped a hand on her forehead, taking a deep breath. “I don’t want you and Harry to fight again.”

“So you’d rather have you and me fight instead?”

She rolled his eyes at the joke and punched his shoulder.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, giving a smirk. “I won’t do that again. I promise. Anything else?”

“Actually…” Y/N trailed off and bit her fingertip. He waited for her to say something, but she only shook her head. “Never mind. Just...stay out of their family drama.”

“Got it.” He gave a firm nod and exchanged another smile with Y/N before she went back to Harry. Once she was gone, he let out the longest sigh as if he’d been holding his breath since she came up to him. He watched Y/N start a conversation with Gemma and pulled out his phone to send a text.

I spoke to Y/N, everything’s good

A reply came in less than five seconds.

Emi: THANK YOU SO MUCH!

He rolled his eyes and walked into a corner to text her back.

Isaac had helped Emilia the first time by giving her the address of the studio Harry was doing his photoshoot at. He just wanted Harry to hear Winton’s side of the story. He’d witnessed how devastated Y/N had been when she discovered the secret about her parents, so he didn’t want Harry to go through the same thing.

What he had not intended to do was lie to his friends by admitting something he hadn’t done.

I feel terrible for lying to them, please don’t do that again

This time, Emilia took more time to send three messages in a row.

Emi: I'm very sorry

Emi: But if Harry knew I asked his assistant for Gemma’s number, he would be so angry

Emi: I just wanted to help, I thought if I was the one who reached out to Gemma then she would know I sincerely wanted to know her

Isaac swallowed hard and typed down a quick reply to end their conversation.

Just don’t do that again, okay?

Emi: Yes, I promise

Taking a deep breath, he put his phone away and went to find Harry.

[goddamnwebcomics]

I apparently entirely missed the last year was the 5th anniversary of this blog. Well, in honour of this give-or-take joyous occasion, it is time to rank all the webcomics i've read in this blog, for your amusement.

Ranked from Best to Worst: Webcomics of Goddamn Webcomics

9. Carnivores

It is unfortunate that Carnivores has joined the many very old webcomics lost to time. This comic was originally a painful experience, but so many painful experiences came after it, it feels like one of the less worse ones despite having the worst art. Also i can tell Austin did this comic for fun, and not to convey a deep message. Also it's probably the only fetish webcomic in history where fetish itself starts taking a backseat halfway through.

8. Warmage

Warmage is enjoyable for all the wrong reasons. None of Dumok's other comics have gone to the same level of bizarreness Warmage offers with each page. However it is also the host to the worst character to ever appear in this blog, Tsuki. Other than that, Warmage seemed to have semi-intriguing lore and also ended on a rather decent arc, so i think i could've been interested to see it continue, just because i wanna see how much worse it can get. But then again, spanking scene.

7. Kit n Kay Boodle

As i have said before, Kit n Kay Boodle is surprisingly mundane for a furry porn comic, with the exception of horrifying "real life" bits. However since Albert and Richard turned out to be the one and the same, it decreases the creepiness of the comic a lot, as there never was a creepy moment with Richard's hypotethical mother-in-law in real life that was adapted into a distracting furry comic. My hatred of furries has also decreased since reading this comic, and while it's not GOOD or even DECENT by any means, it has gotten a lot less worse over time. And there is WAY worse stuff out there, like...

6. Gene Catlow

Look, at the very least, characters in Kit n Kay Boodle SHUT UP once a while. Gene Catlow is a nonsensical mess that is ultimately over ten years of pointlessness because it never got finished. This comic introduced us to the wonderful world of mystery expositions, stare fu, perfect islands and deaths that don't mean anything. The mysteries are handled in such horrible way, the world develops both really fast and really slowly and none of the arcs have proper climaxes. Gene Catlow is a gigantic afterthought with no purpose.

5. Dominic Deegan

Dominic Deegan is like your old friend you've been to hell and back with, literally. I've spent most time with it, and somehow, the comic always seems to find ways to become worse. Maybe that's the sole intriguing part of it. I already said in the fourth arc or something like that when the comic jumped the shark, but things somehow managed to get way way worse, from horrible puns, to our "hero's" psychotic fits, to a sidecharacter getting canceled for no reason, to TWO of the most pointless and destructive filler arcs of all time. Another thing that hooks you is that it reads like Mookster's personal journal. It's like a trainwreck, you can't just look away. At the very least, Legacy of Dominic Deegan seems better so far.

4. Roommates and 3. Chugworth Academy

These two are the most shortest, and thank god for that. Sure, there is a lot less to unpack than with Dominic Deegan, but DD had at least not-awful pages and few redeeming qualities in between. Chugworth Academy and Roommates are just a pain in the ass every single panel. Chugworth Academy is a terrible gag a day comic that has disgusting Shadmanistic fumes all around it, while Roommates is probably the ugliest furry webcomic ever made that apparently takes place in a world of gay supremacy. Chugworth Academy is only worse because at least Roommates wasn't made by Dave Cheung.

2. Las Lindas

Once upon a time, Las Lindas showed promise, but then it transformed into non-conflict showcase of assholes. Almost every character is unlikable, and anyone that is likable eventually is transformed into a ridiculous caricature that yells at people. Artstyle also evolved from somewhat okay to bewel and emboss madness with insane character design inconsistency, chubby plumpiness and overdose of chibi faces that don't fit with the tone of the scene. This comic is only popular because of the furry boobs, and if anyone cared about the characters this comic would have died before 2010's even started.

1. Spinnerette

If Dominic Deegan was an entertaining trainwreck, then Spinnerette is a trainwreck where passengers are kittens, puppies, sick orphans and your loved ones. At the very least Las Lindas is honest about what it is, Spinnerette pretends to be progressive but it is nothing but a showcase of Kraw's fetishes, from furries and lesbianism to giantesses and hysterical fat women? At least the comics that are bad are bad from the getgo, Spinnerette committed an even bigger crime of showing promise at first and then turning into a horrible thing that is beyond saving and that PEOPLE STILL LIKE. Besides the faux wokeness, we also have canonical porn spinoffs and desperate attempts to switch character designs and personalities for no reason. It's a bit scary that this comic is so bad, my fan theory is becoming more plausible page by page. Spinnerette is beyond saving and going nowhere, it is so bad riffing it makes you feel like you want to riff just about anything else, and that is why Spinnerette is the worst webcomic i have ever riffed.

[tuiyla]

Hey, I've loved reading your long Bubbline rants, do you have anything to say about their interactions in Elements and Ketchup? (Also, Marceline's presence in Bonnibel Bubblegum). As of now, where do you think their relationship lies and where do you think it's headed? Do you think they'll become explicitly canon before the show ends?

Hi there! You don’t know how amazing it is to hear that :D Thank you, it’s always great to hear that my rants aren’t just nonsense to others. I’m going to rant again to show how grateful I am, just a quick note first.

The reason why it’s been a while since I posted a rant about Bubbline is that I started doing regular reviews for Adventure Time about a year ago, and so that became my “AT thoughts” outlet. Well, I actually began with retrospectives and I’ve been doing reviews for new episodes since Season 8 premiered. I try to contain myself at least a little bit with these, although my inner shipper still shines through when talking about stuff like The ShirtTM, because who can resist that. I did write about “Elements” and “Ketchup” there, but I’m so glad you asked this because this way I can rant just about the Bubbline aspect.

It’s also a really convenient timing as I’ve been wanting to write about Bubbline, based on discussions I’ve had with friends and other ideas. Some of those might still happen, but at least this gives me an opportunity to voice some of what I’ve been thinking about.

Indeed, I do have a lot to say about their most recent episodes. First of all, can I just point it out that literally all of Marceline’s appearances since the beginning of Season 7 featured Bubblegum as well? Whether they are both main characters like in “Varmints” or “Broke His Crown”, minor ones like in “The Music Hole” or even cameos like “President Porpoise is Missing!” and “Wheels”. The only exception since “Varmints” is “Everything Stays”, where Marcy only mentioned PB, or I guess you could be really critical and say that “Ketchup” doesn’t count. But nitpicking aside, these last three seasons seem to have an agenda.

Not that I don’t see how the lack of Marceline as an individual character has been alarming but from my perspective, the last seasons are clearly going somewhere. I declared after “Stakes” that it’s basically canon and that feeling only grew stronger after “Broke His Crown”, but with that also came a worry that this might be it. After all these years of waiting for the creators to do something, I, along with many others, was worried that “blatantly obvious for those who want to see it but not quite explicitly stated” is the best we’ll get. How do I feel about this following Season 8? Well…

“Elements” wasn’t exactly about Bubbline itself of course, but it contained plenty of small moments that serves as further “proof” for those wanting Bubbline to become canon - and make no mistake, I’m a proud member of that group, but it still wasn’t actual proof, was it? We had Marshmeline staying loyal PB and being constantly by her side, her humming “Greensleeves” and even wearing the famous “What Was Missing” outfit. Uncivilized Elk did a wonderful analysis on what the use of “Greensleeves” might mean, and though I don’t necessarily agree with all of it, I definitely think that the choice of song is intentional and further develops the Bubbline relationship, even if only in a subtle way.

“Ketchup” is much more interesting in that it details what happened before “Elements”, in its own whimsical way. When reviewing the episode I mentioned how Marceline’s story could be interpreted in many ways, but an obvious choice is to take what she said with a grain of salt and apply it to how PB transformed into the pure candy elemental. I absolutely adore this episode and how it lets Marcy process her thoughts and feelings, I love how much she’s grown and how her relationship with PB– sorry, Lollipop Girl is portrayed. What we see is that Marcy fought against the elemental spell and tried to snap Bubblegum out of it (might or might not have even confronted Patience about it) but ultimately gave in so she could be by Bonnie’s side as the spell washed over Ooo.

What’s great about this is not just the very heavy implication that Marceline cares this deeply about PB. Well, that’s great, but it’s mostly just amazing to see how far she’s come since “I’m Just Your Problem”. She still has her own way of coping with things and some stuff is still too hard to talk about (like her mother at the end of the episode), but she’s trying. She admits how much this affected her and she admits how much she cares about Bonnie. This might not seem like a big deal now, but think back to Season 3 Marcy. Even though Bubblegum is strictly speaking not even in the episode, “Ketchup” is yet another milestone for these two.

I didn’t know how to incorporate my thoughts on Marcy into the “Bonnibel Bubblegum” review so here we go. It’s a shame she didn’t have any lines but that was most likely down to real life voice acting reasons, maybe they didn’t feel like dragging Olivia Olson into the studio for two lines. But even without saying anything Marcy’s presence is significant for the same reason that “Ketchup” was: it shows us how far our characters have come. The episode is clearly about the eponymous character and her past, but the scenes set in the present tell us that Finn, Jake, PB and Marcy (along with BMO, sometimes) just hang out as casual friends. Again, think back to “What Was Missing” and how they were almost forced to hang out together.

That being said, I have another thought regarding this most recent episode and the end of the show in general, which leads us into the last section of this answer. Where the Bubbline relationship lies right now and where it’s headed, hmm. Where it lies now, if you ask me, is in limbo. Throughout Season 7 we saw them talk through their problems, become close friends again and ever since then it’s been a ship tease and subtext paradise. I guess if you’re reading this I don’t have to explain how almost every one of their interactions could be interpreted as a couple, so just take that for granted. The subtext is there, hell, it’s this close to being actual text. But it’s not actual text, is it? And that’s annoying me more and more as each episode passes.

Look, Adventure Time only has 12 episodes left until the end. Around two hours worth of TV is all we’re going to get, and I would love to trust the creators but I’m growing anxious. There are a few characters arcs and storylines that need resolving and Bubbline is one of them. With episodes like “Marcy & Hunson” plus the inevitable battle of wits between Bonnie and Uncle Gumbald coming up I’m not really afraid of them not getting well-deserved conclusions as individual characters. Wouldn’t it be a damn shame though not to have a final scene between just the two of them though? And I’m not talking Korrasami level last scene, neither of them is the protagonist so I get that they are not the main focus of the show. But for all this build up to go nowhere, to stay in this limbo of just enough to see that there’s something but not quite there yet, now that would be a narrative nightmare.

I couldn’t hide the fact that I ship them even if I wanted to, so I’m saying this as a proud fan but also as someone who tries to view it all objectively: Bubbline has to happen at this point. Where do I think it’s headed? Well, it’s headed towards them being a couple, it’s been heading there for years now. From a narrative point of view, it makes perfect sense (this is one of the posts I’ve been wanting to write but haven’t had the time yet). It wouldn’t just be fanservice or giving into the pressure of representation - if anything, this would still be viewed as a move against societal expectations. I’ve talked about why it would mean a lot for Bubbline in particular to become canon, but it’s not just about the LGBT+ aspect of it. Every scene shared between these two have been heading towards a moment where they finally admit their love for each other.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful when I say all that we’ve had so far is not enough. If anything, all that’s happened since “Varmints” was unimaginable for me back when I started watching Adventure Time five years ago and the only major episode Bubbline had was “What Was Missing”. Even after “Sky Witch” I wondered if they were ever going to go anywhere with this great relationship. But they did, we’ve already seen such beautiful scenes between the two and by no means am I trying to undermine the importance of their friendship. The way these two found each other again after what was clearly a bad falling out is amazing. They mean the world to one another and no matter what happens, that’s canon. Bonnie and Marcy canonically care so much about each other that they are willing to face their own personal demons to keep the other safe.

So I do appreciate what we have right now and honestly if it wasn’t for the blatant “sub”text and the many signs, I would be happy with a Bubbline friendship. I would still ship it romantically, but if I didn’t see signs that the creators want to go for it I would be able to accept that. As I keep saying though, it’s too much at this point for it to go nowhere. I think they have to become explicitly canon before the end, in a way. If they don’t, all of this was for- well, not nothing, but for an underwhelming conclusion.

I’ve been thinking about this lately: what would I do if AT ended without Bubbline becoming canon? Would it affect the way I view the end of the series as a whole? Probably. And maybe this is more the shipper side of me speaking, but I don’t think I would be satisfied with the way they wrap things up if Bubbline doesn’t happen. Even if it does there are still ways in which the finale could be unsatisfactory, but at this point, Bubbline has also become a major factor. 

Because of all of this I really, genuinely hope that Bubbline does become canon by the end. I have faith in the creators and I don’t think they would queerbait knowingly. Would I say I’m sure it will happen, though? Not really. Again, 12 episodes left and so much to resolve, but the best we can do for now is appreciate what we have and keep on hoping. Hey, I never could have imagined Korrasami would truly happen, despite wanting it so bad and seeing the subtext, but maybe it’s safe to start expecting stuff like this.

Anyway, sorry I kept you waiting with this answer, but I hope you’re reading this, Anon, and that you have a great day!

[cardandpixel]

Top 8 Grab & Go Games...

When it comes to packing for anything it's safe to say I'm atrocious. I overpack for even a simple evening away (sorry, for those still following the 20th C, 'evening away's are something we used to do before we took up as permanent residents of our soft furnishings). I've often had this discussion with friends and colleagues - the simplest one is "how many pairs of pants do you need for x-time away"?  The obvious formula here is xdays + 1 for emergencies, but this thinking is waay too simplistic and covers a pitiful array of contingencies. I would argue that a sudden and catastrophic change of weather to downpour conditions needs to be considered, as does an unexpected drive-by of a large lorry thru an adjacent puddle, fall in a stream/burn or river, being unexpectedly caught in a fountain based celebration etc etc etc. This immediately doubles or even triples the amount of basic layers - pants, socks, trousers, tees etc. And then, we can relax into actual choices for formal vs casual, sudden wedding invitations whilst away and national or academic award ceremonies. It's a minefield. Unfortunately, this approach to covering the bases has translated thru to my boardgaming. I blame Ikea. Frankly their big blue bags allow the simple transportation of many, many titles, including some decent sized heavyweights. Never tried it, but I'd reckon you'd have a reasonable shot at getting TI4, Gloomhaven and possibly 7th Continent in just one of Ikea's capacious holdalls. As a result, I used to turn up to games evenings at work with at least 2 Ikea holdalls of big box games (for an evening that in honesty, we'll only really have time for 1 or 2 games), but with the added bonus bag now which includes what I call my 'grab shelf'. Games that are my usual suspects, these are usually my filler or party games designed to give us warm-up plays or while we're waiting for others to arrive at 7. (We did say 7 didn't we: I'm sure we said 7... was it definitely today?) So here's my round up of the games that we rarely leave home without - we actually do keep them on the top of a bookshelf in the games room and sort of 'scoop' them into a bag if we're in a hurry! These are in no particular order of favour, and most probably just what I can recall from the shelf next door, there will also be some crossover with a list I wrote a while ago on 'little' games...... 1) POINT SALAD - AEG Molly Johnson, Robert Melvin, Shawn Stankewich apx £16 This deceptively simple card game has become a house favourite since we were invited to play it at Airecon one night in the hotel. It's a simple set collection game with a little twist. The vegetable cards to collect have scoring criteria on the other side. A scoring card may be flipped and converted to a veg card once in your hand but not back to a scoring card. The scoring cards are achievements like 'lowest number of lettuces =10pts', 'pepper+lettuce+onion = 5pts per set' etc. The 'market' starts with 3 rows of cards, scoring side up and 2 cards are flipped to veg side next to each. Players will take either one scoring card or 2 veg. The game is tricky enough in terms of optimising your own tableau, but factor into that if you start paying attention to what your opponent is trying to do, the game soon gets highly strategic and gratifyingly dirty. 2) DEEP SEA ADVENTURE - Oink Games Jun Sasaki, Goro Sasaki apx £15 Oink Games produce some of my favourite small box games. They are usually simple, bright, fun and challenging. Though I would put in a good word for other titles in their range like: Moneybags, Fake Artist, Troika and Nine Tiles Panic, it is Deep Sea Adventure that stands out. Players are all treasure hunting divers departing a submarine, diving as far as they dare before their joint oxygen runs out. As a push-your-luck game, DSA is genius. It's that joint oxygen that is the real trick here, as your greed may end up costing other players the chance to get back to the ship safely. The deeper you dive, the more oxygen you use, and your treasure is collected blind for its value, so all your risk may have been for very little eventual reward. If the oxygen does run out, any unrecovered treasure you are carrying goes in a pile right at the bottom of the sea, adding to the temptation even more. DSA is a brilliant joint screw each other over game, and may be best avoided with very intense and serious players, but with an easy-going fun group, it's a true gem. 3) LOST EXPEDITION - Osprey Games Peer Sylvester apx £18 I'm a big fan of co-op games, and finding a small box filler co-op is always interesting. We bought the game for its artwork as 'er across the table was a fan of the Blake & Mortimer graphic novels which share a design ethic and The Rainbow Orchid which is by the same artist here, Garen Ewing. This game is beautiful to look at, but savage to play. Players must chop their way thru an Edgar Rice Burroughs style jungle to reach the lost city. Along the way they must face a relentless series of challenges that will demand careful management of very limited resources. The players are aided by explorers with useful skills, but limited health, and by the end of the journey it is entirely possible you will have had to have sacrificed at least one of your explorers to meet the demands of the jungle. It became even more horrifying to discover that these explorers are based on actual historical characters, so that choice to sacrifice the lovely little old lady Ines, is actually choosing to leave a real life character to the fate of leeches, tigers, swamps or quicksand! Another group favourite and a great pub game due to its fairly small footprint. This is also available as Judge Dredd - Cursed Earth which also features some very neat solo play rules. 4) DINOSAUR TEA PARTY - Restoration Games Rob Daviau, JR Honeycutt, Justin Jacobson apx £16 Restoration Games have been doing an amazing job the last few years refreshing classic older games and turning them into great new games. They are probably best known for the highly successful Kickstarter for Fireball Island, and their great new version of Downforce. Dinosaur Tea Party id probably their smallest game, but it's big on fun. At its core, it's basically an elaborate bonneted dinosaur version of Guess Who. The utter joy of this game comes when a really cool group goes for it and roll plays the social interactions of these wannabe socialite reptiles. There's a couple of extra little twist rules thrown in like dinosaurs who might always lie, always give the wrong answer etc, and these do spice up an otherwise straightforward deduction game, but honestly, when you are looking for a very light, simple, bright, and funny filler or end of evening game, you can't go wrong with this adorably drawn game. 5) CROSSING - Asmodee Yoshiteru Shinohara apx £9 Known fondly to our group as 'The Pointing Game', The Crossing is a brilliant yet almost painfully simple push-your-luck game with no downtime at all. Players vie for gem treasure on several mushrooms in the centre of the table by pointing at them. If only one player is pointing to a pile, they win it and place it in front of them. If two or more players point at the same pile, nobody wins any gems and the pile grows bigger next round. On the second round, players can either point at a new mushroom or point at the pile of won gems in front of another player. Players may also cover their won gems instead of pointing and thereby convert won gems to stored gems where they're safe. Not impossible with smaller player counts, but the game becomes utter chaos at higher player counts and games rarely end without collapse into hilarity all round. Each round plays in about 2 minutes and the game ends when the gems in the bag run out. Points are awarded for sets of colours, rare white gems and single points for any other gems. Crossing is tense, full of 'dagnammit' moments and gets played to death when it hits the table. Highly recommend though I understand it can be a little tricky to get hold of at the mo. 6) MONIKERS - Palm Court Alex Hague, Justin Vickers apx £20 It takes a lot to take an eye-rolling party game and transform it into something a bit special. Monikers basically takes the game of Charades and treats it to a much more anarchic edge. Starting with the topics to be guessed, Monikers is shamelessly nerdy and often needs a little more of a deep nerd-dive into net and popular culture, citing popular memes, channels, phenomena and personalities. Nyan cat, lightsaber kid, and Bob Ross all make appearances in the card decks. Monikers is a team game, and starts with a simple description round where players are not allowed to use the title on the card or any words in the description. Round 2 moves this to a single word, and round 3, merely a gesture (there are some hilarious community suggestions for other rounds eg glove puppets and shadow fingers). Again, with the right group, this game is brilliant, but I accept with the wrong group, could fall flat as a pancake. There are a couple of expansions which effectively play as stand-alone games, but I can highly recommend the completely insane Shut Up & Sit Down Nonsense Box as a good starting point. 7) CELESTIA - BLAM Games Aaron Weissblum apx £21 Sometimes a good filler game comes in a slightly larger box, especially if it features and adorable 3D skyboat! Celestia is a beautiful game to look at, and a brilliant semi co-op push-your-luck game. Each round, a new captain tries to convince the passengers on their ship to stay aboard and venture to lands anew. The further the ship goes, the higher the reward but the much greater the risk. Passengers have to decide if the de facto captain for that round has the resources in their hand to meet the challenges rolled on the dice for that journey.  Passengers can decide to leap off if things look too dodgy and gain lower rewards, but there's also betrayal and nefarious shenanigans to be had with skyhooks, rocket packs etc which may allow passengers to throw other players off the boat, or even the Captain using a jetpack to abandon ship. Celestia is a classic game, and though the rulebook can take a little interpretation at first, the game is fun, solid and a great filler game. 8) RAILROAD INK - Horrible Guild Hjalmar Hach, Lorenzo Silva apx £16 We play a lot of roll/flip/draw and write/build/draw games in our house and this slot could be filled by quite a large number of them which I might save for another list, but some notables are Welcome To, Roland Wright, Rolling Ranch, Dino World and Cartographers. However, despite all these great games, we keep coming back to one nose ahead title, Railroad Ink. We have the Blazing Red edition, but honestly, they are all great including the two new KS versions that recently funded: Forest Green and Desert Yellow. Each set has its own little foibles and unique mechanisms, but the core of these games are the same. What I love about Railroad Ink is that it constantly feels like you have a little more control in this game than some others, which is a 2 edged sword as therefore goofs also have a greater sense of ownership too. Scoring can be a little tricky to decipher the first couple of games, but the production of the game, wipe clean boards, and unique usage make this a stand out favourite. 8.5) An honorable mention.... I didn’t include this one in the list as it probably belongs better in the Roll & Write list, and it’s also more of a ‘big box’ game, but we nearly always take SUSHI ROLL everywhere with us now. It’s the R&W version of the Sushi series and is genuinely brilliant. The dice for a start look almost edible themselves, and it features some really smart little dice drafting that mimics the mini conveyor belt that caused so much hilarity in ‘that’ episode of Miranda. It’s a great theme, it’s immediately engaging, has great player aids and is one of those rare games you immediately want to play the minute you finish as you’s sure you can do better next time. I hope there's some games here to poke your interest glands and become your next favourite filler or "dinner's a-cookin" game. Happy gaming y'all

(Apologies - no idea why Tumblr suddenly won’t let me add images after posting, but if anyone knows, please get in touch!)

[oreoguy55]

The "C" Team: No Better A Birthday (Part 1)

No Better A Birthday

    K’thriss was familiar with the weight his shoulder carried. Every morning it was the same, as was the heft required to lift it. As was routine, K’thriss Drow’b awoke, entrenched in mass not of his own. Gripping him tightly was the swollen forearm of one Dragonborn Narcissist, Donaar Blitzen.

    “Big D,” said K’thriss “You’re doing it again.”

    Met with only thundering snores, K’thriss tried to wriggle free, but the well-worn muscles of the dragon kept him in check. Outside in the hallways of the Dran and Courtier, a commotion was beginning to stir. Muffled by the doorway, K’thriss could make out the determined voice of the “C” team’s documancer and chief nature nurturer Walnut Dankgrass. A succession of hard, rampant knocks battered through each of the “C” Teams doorways. Donaar’s room gave Walnut no reply, as did Rosie’s. K’thriss checked his surroundings best he could to make sure she hadn’t made stay in here as well.

“K’thriss you awake?” said Walnut, “Is Donaar sleeping in there again?!”

“Yes and Yes. Please help”

Walnut slid a piece of paper under the door.

“I need you to sign this, it’ll grant me permission to breakdown your locked door and invade the privacy of your room”

    “I can’t…oh hold on one second”

A moist, purple tentacle emerged from under the blankets of K’thriss’ bed. It slithered over to the ink-stained wooden table and removed a quill. After a quick dab of black, it signed the document K’thriss Droub,  and slid it back under the door.

“K’thriss you have to sign this”

“I give you verbal permission!”

Walnut sighed, rolled up the scroll, prayed the Acquisitions Inc. home office wouldn’t notice the difference, and kicked down the door. She entered to a constrained K’thriss and a napping Donaar Blitzen.

“Not again” she said, “Hey! Donaar, wake up!”

Both Walnut and K’thriss were met with an unending stream of snores.

“This is ridiculous” said Walnut.

Walnut instantly transformed her mind, body and soul into the ferocious Wolfnut. She pounced on the bed, put her snout up to Donaar’s face and howled a true howl, one that had been building in her from the moment she had awoken today.

“Agh!”

Donaar’s body sprung forth from the mattress and jolted upward in Dragonborn fury. His eyes widened at the sight of Wolfnut.

“Wolf in my bed! Die wolf!”

He immediately began to swing his fists at Walnut, who instinctively changed back into her more recognizable form.

“Oh hey Walnut, what’re you….ohhhh”, said Donaar “My B”.

“Donaar, you’re constant cuddling of K’thriss is cutting into official ‘C’ team business.”

“I wasn’t…He was cuddling me! Right? We all saw that!”

“Pardon, my friend, but the sleepwalking has been happening ever since the caves. Though I feel it’s more of a chokehold than a friendly cuddle” said K’thriss.

“Actually I’m not sure if it counts as sleepwalking if all you do is leave your room to come sleep in my bed, consistently, every night.”

“For all we know this could be my room, and my bed” said Donaar

“Donaar, look at me” said Walnut, “I can’t control what you do but I can guarantee that if this behavior keeps up you’ll be waking up to a fist of full of wolf every morning. Or maybe a bear, I haven’t fully decided yet.”

“But he…” said Donaar, “okay okay I sleepwalk god! I’ll just… put a hold on it.”

“Excellent, anyway, to the matter at hand. Now, huddle up ‘C’ team because we have a whopper of a…” said Walnut. “Wait a minute, where’s Rosie?”

Weeknights at the Dran and Courtier were absolute. They were scheduled, they were maintained. Patrons arrived and left like clockwork, so much so that many could chart their night according to who had departed and who still remained. Last night, though, had been different. Last night was the night Rosie Beestinger had decided to stay up.

“Oh, I’m sure you can do better than that dearie”

Rosie felt a satisfying weight in her hand. It was that of an empty glass. The man opposite her at the table did not know this satisfaction as his beer flowed over the cup and onto the hard oak table. Rosie was surrounded by a throng of men who, the night before, had the assuredness to challenge Rosie to a drinking contest. After watching Rosie receive a payment for a recent job, the men thought it necessary to seek the removement of those funds from Rosie’s hands.

“I just….give me one se-se-second”

After the first few rounds the men were beginning to get suspicious. There were remarks of Rosie being a stalwart, young man who had shapeshifted in order to hussle funds. People suggested that she had that “Drow’b man” hex her to increase her tolerance. The men knew the words to be nonsense as it left their lips. They had heard talk of the latest denizens of The Dran and Courtier. They thought they knew who they were dealing with. Rosie was happy to show them that they did not, and will never, know.

“I’m waiting young man” said Rosie “life is too short to wait for fools”.

“I’m almost…j-j-just you wait you–”

The ragged man picked up his drink for what would be the last time. He titled the heavy glass and felt the beer pour down his mouth until he could drink no more. He passed out, soaked in beer and foam. The men around the table roared for their fallen comrade. This was not a crowd to displease as condemnation soon rose from the rabble. Rosie was used to the grunts and hollers of simple men. Grandmamancy was more than they deserved.  

“Now boys…” said Rosie.

An iridescent blue wave of mist emerged from the center of the table. It permeated throughout the men, soothing their cries and calming their minds. The men began to quiet down, and as dawn finally settled into morning, so too did their hearts into their fists.

“…I think it be best if we all went home. Today is a new day.”

The crowd dispersed and Rosie sat there, across from the now sleeping man, slightly buzzed and mostly pleased. She had taken her winnings from the table and was looking forward to informing her friends that she had doubled their earnings. As she began to get up, she gave a slight nod to Propha, who had stayed up to watch the competition.  

“Sorry about the ruckus” said Rosie

“It’s no trouble. Thanks to your game I just took in what I’d normally make in a week” said Propha

The steps of the Dran and Courtier squeaked as the rest of the C team made their way down. Walnut led, eager to find their missing companion.

“There you are!” said Walnut.

“Don’t tell me you all came down just to search for me?”

“Yes! I received an important message this morning”

“A message from who?” Asked Propha

“Oh hey Mama Dran” said Donaar, “didn’t see you there”

“Hello Donaar, as I said, who sent you this message? I had no parcels come your way.”

“No it wasn’t a package! It was an apparition! Of Jim Darkmagic!”

“Walnut honey, did you get any sleep last night?“ asked Rosie.

“I had an extensive 8 hour session of paperwork and capped it with an early morning meditation. I’m fine.”

“Lookin’ good feelin’ good that’s what I always say” said Donaar.

“I’ve tried looking good but I can never get to the feeling good part” said K’thriss.

“Guys, guys! I received a message from Jim, the Jim Darkmagic. He gave us a job!” said Walnut.

“Why didn’t he just send us a commission like usual?” Asked Rosie

“ He said he was going to but forgot and now it’s super last minute so he had to send a message to us via apparition.”

“We’ve all been there am I right?” Donaar said, lifting his hand for a high five to no one in particular. It was not returned.

“ I don’t know, this seems a bit unorthodox” said Rosie, “whats the job?”

Walnut’s face became that of electricity. Her eyes arced upward and sparked with excitement. Her eyebrows jolted towards her hairline. Each word that was said had a bolt of lightning attached to it, reigning down joy on those who dare listen to the Druid describe the job from Acquisitions Incorporated.

“Birthday. Party. Security”

“I’m sorry what?” said Donaar.

“We’re going to be the head security at the birthday party for Jim’s 9 year old nephew, Jackson Darkmagic” said Walnut

“Jim has a nephew?” said Donaar “named Jackson?”

“He’s mentioned him before” added K’thriss, “ he’s very fond of him. I hoped to fill that hole in his heart when we adventured together. Sadly, I failed”

“Okayyyy, anyway the party isn’t too far from here it’s just past Oakridge so if we head out now-” said Walnut.

“Whoa whoa hold up, why would he need security for a-” said Donaar

“Donaar this is from Jim himself! He’s, like, one step below Omin!  Who cares why he needs security. We impress him, who do think he’s going to tell?!”

“I’m with you dear” said Rosie

“I’m in, I’m in, just wondering that’s all” said Donaar

“Let’s go secure us a 9 year old” said K’thriss. “Wait, that came out wrong.”

[pengiesama]

what do you call a penguin with berseria who has two thumbs and is playing it more

me

did i do that joke right

(we’re getting into real big spoiler territory for berseria so proceed with caution)

while on a pointless plot detour to get medicine for the pirate ship, we learn via Magilou planning on forcing Bienfu to drink her medicine for her that, if malakhim drink medicine or potions, whatever they drank also affects their bonded exorcist. thus, when Mikleo drank the aphrodisiac potion, it hit Sorey too. and now you know.

Laphi compares having a person as a vessel to being carried around in a box. and now you know.

the Videl and Laphi friendship is a cute little sidequest. i'm glad Laphi's found someone to nerd out about history and archaeology with. just tough it out for a few millennia and you'll have Sorey and Mikleo as your new nerd fathers.

i never liked that magic gun nonsense in Zestiria and kind of rolled my eyes at it being back here. at being forward here? prequel grammar. it being a gun is just so incongruous to the setting, and not in a good way -- i know it's brought up that it's such a "mysterious-looking thing" but it's just a big clunky glock with some shit taped on it. plus, its powers are so vaguely-defined that it's essentially a deus ex machina fix-it button for a whole bunch of random shit. it makes you more powerful when you shoot yourself in the head with it, also it de-brainwashes malakhim when you shoot them with it, also it dispels illusions when you shoot them, also if you tell a seraphim to climb in and be ammo you can kill god and it kills the seraph except when it doesn't and that was never a concern, what are you talking about. so yeah not happy that it's back

they did explain how zaveid got it, though, and gave a little backstory on him -- he used to be a brainwashed slave malakhim, and when he was sent by the Abbey to assassinate Aifreid, Aifreid shot him with that gun (which he picked up while pillaging a faraway land) and it debrainwashed him. because reasons. then Aifreid entrusted him with it to keep it out of the Abbey's hands when he was captured. so thrilling.

i really miss the cute character banter in the enemy book from Zestiria -- each and every enemy had its own unique commentary by the party. Berseria's enemy book is completely vanilla; just enemy stats.

one of the many other things i miss from Zestiria is that there's literally no reason to ever stay at inns unless the plot forces you. that's something i've always grappled with in RPGs in general -- why bother ever staying at inns when you've got healing spells, healing items, or healing save points? Zestiria's forced integration of inns into the skit system definitely wasn't without its flaws, but it at least made me visit them.

berseria: a whole story quest abt finding someone who can read the ancient tongue even a little sorey: i taught it to myself at age 8 lol

the ancient tongue is also known as "Ancient Avarost"; it's very complicated with a grammar structure that revolves around swapping words around on the page and trying to figure out things in context. thus it is all the more impressive that Sorey taught it to himself, reading AND writing AND speaking, fluently, at age 8

what is with all the misspellings in skit dialogue and in speech bubbles. what even is QA. we just don't know.

Grimorh is soooooo far superior to Bienfu as the token "cute mascot" party member it's not even funny. she's an elegant old lady scholar Normin who tutors Laphi and constantly takes potshots at every party member when they're being annoying. kill+skin Bienfu and replace him entirely with Grimorh.

Laphi asks Magilou about the books on her belt, she immediately starts sexually harassing him and essentially forces him to lift and look up her skirt. please kill the skit writer.

i really love the discussion and closer look at the elemental lords/Empyreans! Zestiria didn't have much on them (for good reason, as worship of the elemental Empyreans was basically extinct even in Berseria's time), but in Berseria we visited a whole seaside culture and temple dedicated to the worship of Amenoch, the water Empyrean. they explain that they attribute the typhoons that temporarily routed the mainland's takeover of their land to Amenoch's doing.

Amenoch's temple is so pretty! it's underwater with lovely waterfalls and the bow crest everywhere! but it's a water dungeon so, as is a proud gaming tradition, it is a pain in the ass without a guide!

there are so many child sacrifices in this universe. like, so many. there have been at least three in this game alone, not even counting Zestiria's track record.

it wouldn't be a Tales game without an 8-year-old girl in fetish wear. who constantly shrieks and cries and talks in cutesy baby words while the camera zooms in on her exposed chest and crotch. fucking vomit.

Laphi has harnessed the power to alter the flow of time and uses it on petty shit like fighting rogue wildlife. sweet baby.

writing out the dealio on the plot for my own reference and for anyone interested. the Empyreans are the four elemental seraphim lords mentioned in Zestiria. there is a fifth Empyrean known as the Nameless Empyrean, or Innominat. he is an ancient dragon Empyrean with eight heads, and eats malevolence. the elemental Empyreans oppose him. malevolence, as we know from Zestiria, is naturally generated by humans at all times simply because they experience emotion, and eventually turns them into monsters. this is not common knowledge in Berseria, and is in fact a secret that the malakhim have deliberately hidden from humanity, as they fear it would make everyone lose their shit. it is taboo to speak of it and Eizen only eventually explained after the party ganged up on him about it. because humans don't know about malevolence, they assume the "daemonblight" is a mysterious curse/sickness; instead of humans simply falling to their own negative emotions. malakhim are not capable of generating malevolence unless they've already turned into dragons, and it is highly toxic to them. the earthpulse is essentially the lifestream from FF7 -- it's the churning energy of the planet, and is where all naturally-born malakhim come from. there are leypoints around the planet where the earthpulse is especially strong, and magically-sensitive people and civilizations in the past have built temples and structures on top of them to honor the malakhim/Empyreans as gods. the eight heads of Innominat are known as therions, a subtype of daemon -- Innominat chooses people/animal/things to turn into therions, based on their reciprocity to his power. if a therion is killed, a random individual gets immediately transformed into a new one to take its place. the Abbey's plan to awaken Innominat revolves around plonking therions on top of earthpulse leypoints to absorb malevolence from the surrounding citizens. the therions pass the malevolence on to Innominat, who will eventually awake once he's fully fed. removing the therion from the earthpulse point stops the feeding frenzy, but the disruption in the flow of malevolence will almost immediately make all humans in the surrounding area succumb and turn into daemons. so far, we have three of eight therions: Velvet herself, a bug we found in the forest, and that obnoxious half-naked eight-year-old. yes, i'm serious, this is the destructive force we're up against. we're currently looking for the others to stop Innominat's awakening (which i'm sure we'll fail to prevent, and i hope the eight-year-old dies or puts on some fucking clothes jesus christ bamco), Laphi has the ability to search for them through his compass. once Innominat's feeding tubes are cut off, i assume we trek on back to the Abbey's clubhouse to let Laphi knife fight him again. Laphi got him to a standstill last time and i've been stuffing herbs in his mouth since then so i think we'll do fine. 

[thekoreanlass]

I’m Not a Robot (로봇이 아니야; Robosi Aniya) is a South Korean television series starring Yoo Seung-ho, Chae Soo-bin and Um Ki-joon. It is written by Kim Sun-mi and directed by Jung Dae-yoon. Producing the series for MBC is May Queen Pictures. It aired on MBC from December 6, 2017 to January 25, 2018 on Wednesdays and Thursdays at 21:55 (KST) for 32 episodes.

The Cast

[Main] Yoo Seung-ho as Kim Min-kyu (28 years old) Chae Soo-bin as Jo Ji-ah (28 years old) / Aji 3 Um Ki-joon as Hong Baek-kyun (34 years old)

[Minor] Santa Maria team Park Se-wan as “Pai” Angela Jin (30 years old) Song Jae-ryong as “Hoktal” Kang Dong-won (33 years old) Kim Min-kyu as “Ssanip” Eddie Park (31 years old)

KM Financial Kang Ki-young as Hwang Yoo-chul (28 years old) Hwang Seung-eon as Ye Ri-el (28 years old)

People around Ji Ah Seo Dong-won as Jo Jin-bae Lee Min-ji as Sun-hye (28 years old) Yoon So-mi as Hong-ju (28 years old) Lee Han-seo as Jo Dong-hyun (8 years old)

The Plot

Kim Min-kyu (Yoo Seung-ho) lives an isolated life due to a severe allergy to other people. He develops extreme rashes that rapidly spread throughout his body once he makes any form of skin contact. Jo Ji-ah (Chae Soo-bin) is a woman who is trying to make it in life by creating her own businesses. However, after an encounter with Min-kyu, she ends up pretending to be a robot in place of the supposed Aji 3 robot. The Aji 3 robot was developed by Ji-ah’s ex-boyfriend, professor Hong Baek-kyun (Um Ki-joon) and his team. The robot was meant to be tested by genius Min-kyu, however an accident caused the robot’s battery to malfunction. As Baek-kyun modeled the robot after Ji-ah, the team ends up recruiting her to take the place of Aji 3.

First Impression

I’m Not a Robot didn’t strike me, at first, as anything interesting so I skipped it. I’m not really a fan of robot stories, much less one that mixes romance with it. Well, not unless it’s anything close to Transformers or Iron Man (I’m Team Tony Stark, sorry) or something akin to it, I’ll probably buy it.

Besides, what are the odds that someone can write some robot shit and love story in one without ruining the story line? Many attempted to do so but failed, so I had my own share of doubts about the drama. From it’s summary, to the choice of cast, the genre and themes. There are so much to worry about.

Plus, the ratings are really low when it aired and people’s reviews were bluntly realistic in a sense. Well, it made sense to me when I haven’t seen the drama yet, but now I think they are just being plain mean and judgmental or just had too much expectations since it’s an MBC produced drama and Yoo Seung Ho is the lead.

I don’t really enjoy criticizing a drama not unless it’s that bad. And I’m Not A Robot isn’t a failure, if you ask me. Finishing it put all my doubts and worries to rest.

Review

Cutie Min Kyu with the Human Allergy

I think that starting the drama with a question and a mystery was a good way to buy the viewers interest.

During the first episode, we see Kim Min Kyu enter a room, I guess, to an interview for his mandatory military enlistment. He must have been in that kind of situation in the past and all the time they think he was just making up excuse not to fulfill his duty to his country, but it’s quite funny to see the officers’ reactions when he revealed the reason why he can’t fulfill his enlistment–he is allergic to humans when his skin merely comes in contact with them. They think it’s a contagious disease and almost bathed in antiseptic.

I thought it was pathetic for people to think that, but at the same time I felt sorry for Min Kyu for getting the kind of rare skin allergy. Nonetheless, this caught my curiosity. I had my own question: why is he allergic to human contact? Is it even possible to be allergic to humans? If so, what caused for him to turn out the way he is? I have a clue as to why but I didn’t really want to get too ahead in the game. All I knew is that it has to be psychosomatic; meaning, he exhibits physical symptoms because of a psychological cause or stress.

On a brighter note, I am blessed to see a really cute side of Min Kyu after his visit to the base. Call it cliche; Min Kyu is a filthy rich 28-year old bachelor, but has the rare character that of a child. He’s so serious, snobbish and untouchable one moment, but has the naivete of a child. I’m not sure if people realized why he’s like that when they watched this, but I’m sure that it rooted from the isolation his allergy to humans caused him.

Just imagine yourself unable to touch another human. Imagine yourself putting up with it with no moral support around you, just an empty house in your inheritance, a huge company to one day rule, a gardener to be your guide, an awful lot of pretending people around you whom you couldn’t trust. I guess, it would really result to him depending on his own, learning on his own–with only books and movies to guide him through, resulting to a man with less knowledge of what life is really like. He was enclosed in a box filled with darkness that he didn’t know what it was like to be under the bright sun or how it’s like to love someone or what it’s like to do things. I think this is the reason why he was so dumb to realize that Aji 3 isn’t really a robot but Ji Ah, who is a human.

Not realizing this might make the story look really dumb, so I’m trying to make a point here if I even make sense to anyone else. Because of this, it made everything else really amusing; the fact that because it’s Min Kyu they were fooling that the plan of putting Ji Ah through the robot act made it foolproof and the fact in which even Santa Maria and Ji Ah are so frustrated and dumbfounded he wouldn’t get a hint she isn’t the real deal. It makes the entire mood comical and light.

And I guess, because it’s Yoo Seung Ho acting that I didn’t find Min Kyu annoying for being so dumb. In fact, he made Min Kyu a really sensible character, adorably charming even. His smile is always so precious and the moment he did that during the first episode when celebrating ‘Pretty’s birthday was so cute I wanted to pinch his cheeks. The depth of his character isn’t nonsense at all, in fact his backstory is really believable for me.

Ji Ah the Human Aji 3

If there is one thing I am really good at, that is doubting. Chae Soo Bin isn’t really a favorite of mine since her last antagonistic role in Sassy Go Go, where in she acted as the backstabbing and lying best friend of the main lead (played by Jung Eun Ji).

That’s also part of the reason why I avoided watching I’m Not A Robot as much as possible, because I felt like once I hate someone because of a particular role they played in the past that truly annoyed me, I would probably hate them forever. Nonetheless, I think I am getting over this pace just like with how I used to criticize Suzy or Park Min Young and I don’t regret any second I spent watching and giving Chae Soo Bin a chance. There’s no doubt she is an actress, a versatile one at that, that you know will do well whether it’s an anti-hero or lead female role.

She proved herself with being a double role with Ji Ah and Aji 3.

Getting to the point, I think she portrayed the misfit Ji Ah really well. At first, we come to learn that Ji Ah isn’t really bright and looks probably dumb to her peers, even her brother who graduated law; this is quite emphasized by her low IQ. That is really fine, though, with me since Chae Soo Bin didn’t really make Ji Ah seem annoying unlike a couple of heroines I’ve seen in the past who has the innocent character but are just really dumb.

Though this emphasis doesn’t really back up the fact that Ji Ah is innovative in her own way, where in she has a way of creating simple inventions, albeit as eccentric looking as how her brain works, she can make it work. She can’t just sell her inventions because of her lack of knowledge how to make a business out of it as President Jo, but because of her simple brain, she gains a little fan–who will later be revealed as our cutie Min Kyu!

Ji Ah gets the courage to join a contest to get herself a sponsor for her new invention–her heart lamps that simultaneously light up if you touch one no matter how far the pair is from each other–but she is hit by ups and downs along the way, including a low blow from her very unappreciative older brother, who will later admit Ji Ah must be a genius behind her dumbness; this was a notable scene where the eccentric-looking Doctor Hong Baek Kyun explained how Ji Ah used quantum physics in making her heart lamps without her realizing it.

On the other hand, as the robot Aji 3; the real one, I am quite impressed at how believable Chae Soo Bin acted as a leggit AI robot. As Aji 3, she fascinated me how she managed to act and speak like a robot. Aji 3 is quite refreshing and adorable with her innocent and blunt robot responses that sometimes frustrated Min Kyu for the lack thereof emotion from her.

With Ji Ah pretending to be Aji 3, I think this is where I get the most comedy from. Ji Ah’s reactions are just so precious, like that time when she reacted out of surprise of seeing Min Kyu after their unexpected squabble over a toy that they almost killed each other for, that I can’t help but anticipate for the next dumb and un-robot like thing she will do.

Min Kyu made the situation even better and even laughable by believing her poor acting as a robot that it’s hilarious. Plus, it is always so much better whenever she is in ‘friend mode’, as Doctor Hong called it, and is either fearlessly swearing at Min Kyu and the latter letting her or just being a friend to our lonely hero who apparently only has his appliances as friends.

With Aji 3 in the picture, Min Kyu finds a precious friend in the human he thinks is a robot. The friendship and trust Min Kyu allowed himself to give Aji 3 credit for, made it possible for him to get cured from her disease, not because of the thought she is a real robot, but instead because he thinks he finally found something real; something that will not betray him.

Chae Soo Bin is able to create a picture of a female lead in Ji Ah and Aji 3, who is filled with warmth, hopes and dreams, and a brightness that sets the mood of the drama to a really lighter note. She’s really pretty too and can really act as a nice girl apart from her old image that I stuck to.

A Unique, Bright Concept and Romance

I’m Not A Robot is arguably going to be your favorite in terms of concept and the adorable, bright, albeit unconventional romance of a human and another human pretending to be a robot.

There’s no dull moments in this drama and the heart fluttering romance is surely something you can indulge on if you’re up for some light romance with a touch of drama. It is so simple yet so complicated you will laugh at the thought of Min Kyu thinking he fell in love with a robot, though unknown to him, he is in fact right in liking this robot because she’s definitely a human. This really brings me back to the old Hana Kimi feels where in the second lead doubted himself because he was crushing on another guy, not knowing that this guy is in fact a girl pretending to be a guy. Ironic, right? Possibly dumb, but very effective to create laughs.

Then on one side, you will totally sympathize with Min Kyu as he starts learning other feelings because of Aji 3. Watching him grow and improve, with his human allergy almost gone, does really make me proud like a mother watching her son grow up. He’s just so cute and innocent, but with a secret angst about betrayal that I watch with a broken heart when he found out Ji Ah is in fact his Aji 3. He thought everything is a lie. That all they went through was too and this really almost killed him. That was probably one of the saddest parts of this series, but I guess, because Min Kyu learned to love Ji Ah as her, that it outweighed the mistrust and eventually he learned to move on from the shadows of his past, curing his illness in the process.

I love that the drama is able to use the robot concept well, in a very refreshing light that doesn’t feel too much or too less. The graphics or effects are absolutely stunning and realistic that I can give five stars for the visuals of it as a whole. And I am glad that they were able to remain faithful to the concept, not wavering one bit throughout the entire storyline

I think to this point that everything is just right. Just perfect that I still feel my heart flutter with thoughts of the story from time to time. Being reminded of I’m Not A Robot makes me fall in love with it over and over again because of these reasons. You won’t get bored every single moment of it.

Chemistry & Bromance is Real

In the beginning, I am not really sure whether Yoo Seung Ho and Chae Soo Bin will click, but I have not seen any moment in the drama where they became awkward or anything. In fact, Yoo Seung Ho as Min Kyu, with googly eyes and an adorable puppy personality, made me believe he truly likes Ji Ah as a robot and as a human. It’s so real I don’t mind them dating.

Then here comes my second and third favorite pair in respective order. (1) Sun Hye and Hoktal – this pair really only proves that opposite attracts. Sun Hye definitely has a unique taste with boys. She comes off as a playful character that doesn’t seriously date, but then when choosing between the cool Ssanip or the conservative Hoktal–that says the opposite of what he really means, she sees beyond the facade and chooses the guy everyone would probably think she won’t choose. (2) Doctor Hong and Pai – the relationship of these two took years in the making. You can probably relate their progress to that of a walking turtle; slowly but surely. Probably Doctor Hong’s lingering feelings for Ji Ah also became a hindrance for him to realize too late his affection for the timid Pai, who later takes the advise of Sun Hye and learned to come out of her own shell. Nonetheless, they are just as cute as the other pairs.

Let’s also not forget the cute bromantic pairs! Ssanip and Hoktal is probably my top bromance pair, leaving me in a heap of laughter with most of their antics. They are quite an unseparable duo to the point Ssanip thirdwheels even when Hoktal and Sun Hye already started dating. It’s like they were a package deal and he can never be left behind.

I also like the Min Kyu and Jo Jin Bae pair.  Together they are a mix of hot and cold. In terms of work, Min Kyu is the boss and Jin Bae is his loyal subordinate. On the other hand, when it comes to Ji Ah, it is fun to always watch whenever Min Kyu’s personality mellows and he resembles a puppy around Jin Bae, his future brother-in-law, always trying to please him. Even going out of his way to hire him again when Jin Bae tried to end his contract with Min Gyu.

Of course, the Min Kyu and Hong Baek Kyun pair also fairs. Though I won’t mind if there was some kind of tension that escalated to some sort of fist fight between them because of Jia, I’m not complaining that they got along instead. It seemed anticlimactic though that it didn’t happen, but it’s not disappointing that Doctor Hong became Min Kyu’s hyung instead and everyone is happy.

Lovable Supporting Characters

I think I have not loved supporting characters as I loved the ones in this drama. They just have very rich character and backstory that I felt more connected to them than not. It made the encounter with these characters even more personal and more human as the store went on, because despite the allegorical portrayal of some themes, these people’s emotions, words and actions made it simple for us to understand their point in a very relatable manner.

Santa Maria Team. I am dumbfounded every time these people bond, because their jokes aren’t really that funny, but their skills are so superior I believed they are real inventors that can do anything and everything. Santa Maria, on top of that, isn’t just a group of people with a hobby of creating robots, but instead a family that has loyalty for each other, is humble and really hardworking.

Doctor Hong Baek Kyun. Though I still can’t believe he’s Jo Ji Ah’s ex-boyfriend–who she calls ‘Fungus Guy’ by the way–I am hands down that Doctor Hong is a genius. Aji 3 is probably his most notable work, but I think there’s no doubt he can do so much more. Plus, I think you know now why he named the robot ‘A Ji 3’ and even created her in the image of Ji Ah; he was so hung up with his ex that is!

Nonetheless, Doctor Hong may be smart, but because he’s so focused at his craft that love always came second to him and eventually since Ji Ah isn’t really in the same league as him that they grew apart. Sharing something in common with Pai made them both more compatible with each other, though there’s no doubt constant bickering is expected of two very common personality.

Pai. To be honest, I found it a little hard to empathize with her character at first because she was too quiet and it looked like she didn’t like Ji Ah very much. But when I realized the reason is because he likes Doctor Hong, all I could complain from then is how annoying her curly curls were and how plain she dressed up. I could tell she is really pretty without the curls and the glasses that I am really happy she changed her appearance for the better but maintained her simple personality. She’s so enduring and so loyal to Doctor Hong that I am also quite happy her one-sided crush with him didn’t end in vain.

Sun Hye. I was thinking that this girl is going to be the typical sidekick that has no real depth in the series, but then it turns out Sun Hye is our modern cupid. Her looks makes her seem intimidating, but it is always quite fun whenever she opens her mouth and says something poetic and predictive and it always comes true. Truly, she is a love guru, who gladly found her own happy ever after with Hoktal. And also a loyal best friend that has a bag of wisdom that often help our protagonists clear their heads.

Ye Ri El. She comes off with a common bitch vibe at first glance, especially when she treats Min Kyu–who liked her for years since he was a kid–coldly and doesn’t acknowledge his efforts of winning her with his sincerity, but I guess it wasn’t really her fault Min Kyu misunderstood her. Her father was the one who continuously wrote to Min Kyu, anyway, pretending to be her, paving her fate by being Min Kyu’s first love and probably last.

I was just happy, though it made the build up turn anti-climatic and kind of get to waste, that she didn’t got with her daddy’s plans and followed her heart when she realized it wasn’t Min Kyu but Yoo Chul she likes and decided to pursue her own path.

Hwang Yoo Chul. I was determined Yoo Chul was going to be the ultimate villain with some vengeful plan in store for Min Kyu that will probably bring him to tears and make him pay with revenge at some point, but his role is almost similar to Ri El, where in he draws back and finds his conscience and admits to his own faults. I find it really  cool though, how he found the strength to ask for forgiveness and do the right thing even if it will compromise his father’s position. It made me respect him and cross him out of the blacklisted characters’ list I kept in my head,

Jo Jin Bae. I found older brother such a jerk when he got mad at Ji Ah for doing what she wants, because though it sounds too far-fetched and fruitless, an older sibling shouldn’t discourage their less privileged younger sister, right? I mean, he should have at least supported her not make her feel like crap more than the situation already was. Gladly, I think Jin Bae grew a pair and came to appreciate Ji Ah and saw how beautiful her her heart was beyond her 80 IQ.

Over All

If you want a cute and light romance, with a set of bright characters and superb acting, that has an easy and steady approach to its overall plot, I’m Not A Robot is going to be the perfect choice. Not only it is sweet, but also filled with underlying lessons about love and life figuratively placed across the story line.

I especially love that they tackled about the lives of different people with almost the same dilemma in the world; people who can’t find a place to belong to and who are struggling all the same whether it was about their dreams and aspirations or simply with getting by life in its tendency to put you into a loneliness that can break you or just finding someone who will sincerely love them. Because they were people yearning for these things that somehow they must have unconsciously found each other, somewhere to belong to.

Notably, I truly appreciate, too, the philosophical take on love; how sometimes the truest love can be in the form of the sweetest yet ugliest lie. This kind of love has seen negative effect most of the time, probably due to the motive of the doer. But I guess, not everyone has bad intentions towards the recipient of their actions. Sometimes you love someone so much that you have to lie to them in order to prevent them from hurting, but you basically hurt them in the process after all, especially if it comes to the point where in they learn about the truth in the most painful way.

“There are times when lying to a friend is better than telling them the truth.”

That’s why I was able to totally relate with Min Kyu when he found out Ji Ah was really his A Ji 3. I mean, it was nice he found someone that really is a mirror image of Aji 3. The idea of it was so dreamy and too impossible that wishing and looking from a distance at something you don’t think can happen and is too far-fetched would be great until it last. I am just glad that his love for her reigned and he was able to see the truth past the big lie.

I know lying may hurt and looking past through it takes so much courage, but if the person is worth it, why not?

“The deeper the love, the deeper the wound. He must have liked you more than you thought.”

In terms of the plot, I must say I commend the drama for having such a light story despite incorporating corruption and politics in the business sense, it’s a relief the story didn’t dive deeper into exploring that area and having our cutie Min Kyu turn into another protagonist fighting for his position in the office or battling for his inheritance for his parents’ sake or something like that. It will only make the story darker and I guess that’s not what the production is aiming for. Since the story have to be easy to watch and light for the heart, I love that they focused more on the romance and the relationship of the characters with each other. By doing this, I think we see a more graspable human story.

What I think  I will call an only ‘miss’ for this drama is the sort of sweet, but really fast-paced and mediocre ending. I guess, because I have invested so much time and emotions during the first 31 episodes that I didn’t expect the ending to just show a few seconds of heaven with how our team is doing. Yes, everyone seems happy and all but it doesn’t really say much or I might have expected so much more. But then, seeing Min Kyu finally get discharged from the military after two years, Jo Ji Ah finally doing good business with her heart lamps, and that sweet ending kiss made up for the miss.

Anyway, I think I got what I signed up for. The drama has hinted on a couple of ideas to which they left it open to the imagination to fill in the blanks. Just like what does Aji 3 really look like after the makeover? They said they will change her face and I guess they turned her to a male robot that they named after the late President of KM Financial. If so, does this mean he will look like the late president or…? Another example is when after all what happened, they didn’t really reveal the identity of Madame X. This mysterious character helped Min Kyu a lot with his battles against those who wished to take over KM Financial, but it isn’t really clear who she is, right? My only guess is that she is either the gardener or the lady Min Kyu talked to and said she is only there to represent Madame X. But then a guess can only remain a guess and we can only wish they will spill the beans.

See my point? They left some questions unanswered not because they want to leave us hanging or they just have a way to end it properly, but instead I think they did it to give us the liberty to find out for ourselves or imagine what comes next. So, even if some were left unsaid and it’s truly quite frustrating, I am not really that upset about it, it just makes me think from time to time what the answer to those questions are.

Nonetheless, I really had a fun time. I say it’s cool and if I will revisit this drama one day, I won’t really mind. Giving it a rating, I think 4.8 out of 5 is perfect.

Review: I’m Not A Robot – A One of a Kind Romance I'm Not a Robot (로봇이 아니야; Robosi Aniya) is a South Korean television series starring