#it’ll be REAL FUCKING CONVENIENT to sympathize

[redley-of-many-noodles]

I generally agree with your tags, prev. Definitely still extremely morally fucked up, but…

I don’t really know if the artist would condone this use of their song, especially considering the subject matter. But I also can’t think of a better song to describe it, kind of. How the hell could they understand until they’re on the receiving end?

With a little empathy, sure, but these are politicians.

They literally will not care about an issue until it starts affecting them and their interests. I mean, it’s all just fake anyway, right? Why should they care?

I guarantee, if people start turning this technology against politicians, who are currently too lazy to do anything about it, they will fucking hear. And the moment it starts getting embarrassing for them, they’ll crack down on that shit.

someone needs to make ai generated porn of congress men and finally get this shit on radars and under control

[writterings]

In light of the new Owl House episode, I have some THOUGHTS about its excellent writing.

So, first things first, I wanna state something that everyone knows but we also kinda forget sometimes; TOH is a kid's show. Yeah, yeah, that's obvious. But also, that GREATLY impacts its writing. However, it also balances this type of writing PERFECTLY with the adult perspective on the world which ultimately does make it great for all ages. And "Yesterday's Lie" is the ULTIMATE example of this.

Luz's story fits the typical isekai plotline - but it also is an example of what real-life kids in Luz's positions want. Like think about her life in the first episode - she had no friends, she wanted adventure and fantasy and magic, and her mom and she weren't seeing eye to eye. She then got whisked away to a magical realm full of adventures, magic, friends (and a girlfriend!), and a mother figure who tries hard to understand her and loves the fact that they're both weirdos. The Boiling Isles is heaven for Luz, just because it's fulfilling all her wants and needs that she wasn't getting in the human world.

As someone who is going into the professional writing field and spends a lot of time in and out of class thinking about writing rhetoric, I've taken one or two classes about writing children's stories/media. And, obviously, children's media is written differently than adult media -- but specifically in the idea of values. Kids value different things than adults because of their perspectives on the world. Hell, the whole reason "whisked away to a magical fantasy world" is so popular in kids' media is because so many kids find themselves in that position in wanting that to happen to them. I sure as hell did when I was Luz's age.

Stories like these essentially are wish fulfillment for kids. And since they are wish fulfillment, that typically means that more real-life concepts such as abandoning family, missing the "real world", or any negative consequences are either conveniently written out in a satisfying way or are left out entirely. (Think how in Harry Potter, he's able to escape the "real" world without negative consequences because his family's abusive.)

(Also, fuck JKR btw but just using this example because this is the example we used in my one children's lit class.)

And what I'm about to say next also explains further how TOH is wish fulfillment, but it starts as a bit of tangent first. Just bear with me, it'll make sense.

Anyways, I've seen a few MP100 posts around that praise the show for having an adult "step in" and tell the child protag that they don't have to fight the villains because they're just a kid. And to me, that shows how MP100 is an adult-focused media -- because a piece of children's media would NEVER do something like that. That's not to say that children's media encourages kids to do dangerous stuff that harms themselves, but it's just not appealing to kids. Kids want to be the ones going on adventures and saving the day. They want to be treated with respect and be trusted as capable as the adults around them. And who can blame them? We all want that - it's just that kids hardly get ANY respect or autonomy. That's why kid's media where the kids are allowed to fight, be the chosen one, or go on adventures is so normal and popular: it's what kids want!

And that, again, is how TOH is wish fulfillment. Luz is allowed to go on adventures, do dangerous and stupid things, and she still kicks ass! Sure, Eda might express concern for her or say she doesn't want her doing something dangerous -- but Eda trusts Luz and is never angry when she goes someplace dangerous (think how she acted in "Separate Tides" when she found out Luz was also there in the cave).

So, ultimately, this is all how TOH's writing reflects its status as a children's show. Which is totally fine! And it's brilliantly written!

But as for the more adult-focused parts of its writing -

To state again, adults value different things in media than kids do. We (since I'm an adult) typically do want to see the more nuanced and darker side of things. We want the complexity. We want subversion of genre. We also want things that reflect our experiences. And TOH does this by addressing realistic negative consequences.

Camilla was upset that Luz left her. She cried and got mad, and even asked the questions of "Were you trying to live out some witch fantasy? Did you hate living with me that much?"

This is a genre subversion because we usually don't get this kind of confrontation in a kid's show. Typically, our plucky young protag who chooses to stay in another world faces no negative consequences for this choice (except for Marcy in Amphibia but for different reasons lol). But here Luz is, watching as her mother cries all because of her choices. It's not explicitly adult and tbh isn't mature - but it's still a level of nuance and character complexity we don't typically get in a kid's show/media. Honestly, it's most likely that adults are the ones identifying with Camilla instead of Luz in this situation - even if we don't have kids. Camilla, essentially, feels abandoned and rejected by her daughter. While some kids might be able to sympathize, it's probably mostly adults (and older teens) who have been through similar situations and emotions. And, in that, shows how TOH can also appeal to audiences in a more "adult" way as well.

But, despite that, it's still not a polarizing scene. It may frustrate some kids watching (or even teens/adults who identify strongly with Luz), but ultimately Camilla's words and actions are still understandable. She's not being evil or mean; she's just hurt. And that's clear! Even Luz sees it! But it doesn't harm the narrative appeal of the show being kids' wish fulfillment because Camilla can't do anything to take Luz away from her amazing life in the Boiling Isles. While she did make Luz promise to find a way back and to stay for good, she ultimately has no power to do anything. The status quo of the show is not changed and it is still wish fulfillment -- though, now, it just has some complexity added to the situation, plot, and characters.

In that sense, the scene where Camilla confronts Luz can still appeal to kids and doesn't make the show unenjoyable for them despite it being a more "adult-focused" scene. Sure, it adds complexity, but it's a type that kids can understand.

And that, basically, is just brilliant writing. It's such a perfect balance of adult and kid-focused,m and the writers definitely understand the values that both children and adults have when approaching media. TOH is definitely one of the best-written cartoons of this decade, and I'm so glad it exists.

Anyways, here's my essay. Thanks for reading if you got this far!

[salty-dracon]

hello my lovelies it is time for more caligula 2 with autotranslations~

By the way if you’re wondering why I keep referring to the subway as a “party train”, here’s why.

Though Doctor was physically in dire straits last time, having fainted out of fear for Maria Ideguchi aka Kranke, we did the right thing and took him back to the PARTY TRAIN, which apparently has a potted plant in it? i fucking love this subway, man. The others are freaking out, and trying to think of ways to help him, but Doctor eventually wakes up on his own. He realizes he’s in the base of the Go Home Club. He realizes that he wasn’t able to locate it on his own because it was a moving train this whole time. Ryuto notes that Doctor can’t leave or escape on his own, as Chi controls the entire space in there. While he’s there, though, the club wants to ask him some questions.

Doctor confirms that there are eight musicians, with the group having defeated five including him and having met two more. He says that the last person they’re missing is Kudan, who is the second most powerful after Bluffman. (On a side note I find it so cute that Sasara keeps referring to Machina as Machina-chan, it reminds me of Suzuna’s relationship with Shonen-Doll from the first game.) He also states that the Musicians were invited by Bluffman to join and lead Redo alongside Regret. Kiriko confirms this with Pandora’s earlier statement. Doctor apparently had no idea that we beat Pandora before. The commonality between all of the Musicians themselves is that they were Doll-P, which means they composed songs using vocal synthesizer programs like Mu in real life. Doctor notes that some were actually starting to make names for themselves as vocaloid producers before Bluffman invited them, while others weren’t, so he doesn’t know what the exact criteria are. (I think.)

When he’s asked about what kinds of people make up Redo, Doctor states that it’s pretty much all people who have some kind of regret in their life, big or small. Basically, anyone trapped by regret IRL is trapped by Regret’s power in Redo. However, Doctor notes that everyone here came of their own volition. Kobato counters that that can’t be the case, because he was just frustrated before he came here. Doctor said that by listening to and sympathizing with Regret’s song, he implicitly gave his consent to be trapped in Redo. He also says that anyone trapped in Redo is suffering from some kind of regret which they remember, and that he is no exception.

When he’s asked about who or what Regret is, he says that she is a virtuadoll, who gains power when real people worship her and her music. Other than that, he doesn’t know much. Who made her, and where and why, he doesn’t know. That being said, he only joined up with her because being in Redo was convenient for him, and not because of any fascination with Regret herself. At the very least, she was better for that purpose than Mu was. This comment sets Chi off, but Gin calms her down.

As for the virus, it was just made to lure the club to the hospital. And it, just like everything else in this world, is just a virtual construction, or data. Bluffman made it according to Doctor’s specifications. It’s otherwise not dangerous, and will heal on its own, but like the flu, it’s only dangerous because people are the source of its energy. That being said, he actually did intend to kill Sasara and Prez, so he has no idea how they’re alive now. This freaks out the group, and he finishes off by saying sooner or later, they’ll likely die too. I think this shows that the Musicians and Regret aren’t really in tune with each others’ desires, and that might be their downfall.

As for Marie, we were told by Bluffman that she is a “special case”, although according to Google the better translation is “singularity”. Doctor reaffirms her status as a singularity, but freaks out when he learns that Marie has been working with us the whole time. He states that the origin of Redo was something called “Micro Mobius”. Mu and Bluffman found it together and updated it over time into what is now known as Redo. Micro Mobius was a world originally created for one person by Mu- Marie Amabuki. Bluffman told Doctor that if an anomaly occurs at the core of Redo, it will collapse, with the core referring to Marie. (This is likely a throwback to the untranslated light novel which stars Marie Mizuguchi. If our Marie is just Mizuguchi without her regrets, everything makes sense to me!)

Or, in other words, if Marie dies... Redo will disappear on its own. This freaks out the team, with none of them really sure what to think. However, we choose to believe Doctor. That being said, Ryuto says we now have a big choice to make. We kill Marie and return to the real world immediately, or we save her and fight Regret instead, who is much too powerful for us. Ryuto says that if we kill Marie, it’ll be a risk-free way to return to the real world, as Regret is too strong, but the others say that it’s only right to save her. Sasara gets angry for the first time.

Doctor asks to be let out of the subway, but Gin stops him and asks him how he can even trust himself. Doctor reveals that his regret was botching a surgery on Kranke and causing her to lose her ability to walk. We note that in Redo, that shouldn’t be a problem, but he says even he doesn’t know why that’s the case, and Bluffman won’t tell him why. He’s only cooperating with Bluffman and Regret so that when Regret becomes stronger, she’d find a solution. Awww that’s a sad backstory. Ryuto chews him out for being a doctor that’s only focusing on healing one patient, to which Doctor replies that he doesn’t like treating human patients like data.

Doctor passes out again, so we let him rest. Ryuto restates that we have to kill Marie for the best chance of getting out of Redo alive. The others aren’t happy with the idea, but don’t see any other choice. Strangely, Chi agrees with Ryuto. The others are shocked until Chi reveals that we ran into Regret in the hospital and tried to fight her, but she was on a different level entirely. Kobato asks us what we thought, we answer. We think of some more proof that Doctor wasn’t lying to us. But it’s a lot to take in, so we’re splitting up for the night.

[frankendykes-monster]

So probably the best way to start this is to mention the obvious and say that Joker (2019) has pretty much all of nothing to do with...The Joker.  I had mention to someone else a week or two back, but for as much as The Joker can work in a wide variety of stories, the character is inherently limited, my go-to phrase being “one dimensional.”  The Joker’s ongoing motivation is that he wants to defeat Batman, nothing more, nothing less.  “Killing Batman” is only a single part of it, “it” being proving that Batman is fallible and has some weakness.  There are characters like The Riddler that zero in on a single aspect of that such as, surely there are some problems that can be created that even The World’s Greatest Detective cannot solve, but The Joker is a convenient character in that he can be applied to any aspect of Batman’s character, which is why you get stories like Batman and The Joker getting into a surfing contest, because it all goes back to that theme of if there’s something that Batman is not the best at, Batman is ultimately doomed to fail (with regards to suspension of disbelief that is needed for superheroes to work, both creators and the audience have to commit to the concept that superheroes existing 100% makes the world around them a better place, and a major incoming failure on Batman’s part makes for greatest suspense in that it threatens that concept.)

But then, there lies the issue.  Joker does not actually have any driving motivation for WHY he wants to defeat Batman, he simply is.  It’s my theory on why no origin story has ever permanently stuck, because you can’t ever really make sense of that.  This compounds itself into Batman and Joker’s relationship and can never really evolve, it’ll play out in the same way every time just with new set dressing.  What you can do is raise the stakes, but with the back to back publishing of “The Killing Joke” and “A Death in The Family” in 1988, raising the stakes meant making The Joker a sadistic serial killer at the cost of everything else about the character, creating a Joker where everyone questions why he deserves to be alive to appear in another comic three to six months down the pipeline.  There have been some instances of trying to make The Joker more nuanced, like Grant Morrison introducing the concept of “super sanity” in their Batman work and addressing how The Joker reinvents his personality on the fly, but it’s ultimately set dressing that doesn’t alter anything.

So, that begs the question of why Joker, the film, calls itself “Joker” in the first place or why it takes place in Gotham instead of New York and blah blah blah the short answer is if they didn’t, Warner Bros wouldn’t have been able to rake in a billion dollars.  It’s on par with Sony deciding to make Venom (2018) and never addressing why Venom has those large white eye covers if his design isn’t based on Spider-Man, I’ll give Joker (2019) the compliment that it’s more interesting than that film at least.  I really did not want to bring up all this Batman shit while watching this but then they started addressing Thomas Wayne and I began mentally groaning.  I don’t want to dive into the concept of how or if the Batman mythos is impacted if you make Thomas (and Martha Wayne, who like in most Batman stories is more of a cameo than an actual character here) a shitty person, but then again I wouldn’t have to bring that up if the film didn’t cram it in in the first place.  I am...SO...SO THANKFUL I did not see any memes or theories or head canons surrounding “B-B_BUH JOCKER IS BEETMANS HALF BROTHER?????/???” which...whatever. Come to think I didn't see anyone bitch that he doesnt become The Joker until 90 minutes in either.  I think the majority of my goodwill (what turned it from, oh you know the good outweighs the bad enough for me to be able to tell someone this is watchable, to, oh you can skip this) was destroyed at the Waynes getting shot scene with, WHOOPS, The Joker was responsible (indirectly!)  That gave me BAD Batman (1989) flashbacks, and when you remind me of Batman (1989), you kind of do get on my bad side.  Fuck that movie.

SO.  In the midst of ALLL of this.  Let’s talk about the “““real source material”““ for Joker (2019): Taxi Driver (1976) and The King of Comedy (1982).

I don’t think I’m ruffling any feathers by saying that that is the case and that both of those films are wayyy better than Joker (2019).  I mean, there’s a reason why Robert De Niro was not only cast in this film, but he’s second billed right under Joaquin Phoenix.  Those are two fairly different films but they’re, at their core, stories of men who are ticking time bombs of violence ready for someone to light the fuse.  It’s another point against Joker (2019), not only for reminding me of much better films, but forcing me to ask why another pastiche of this story needed to be told.  Martin Scorsese kind of made his career with a monopoly on men losing their shit and everyone around them being caught in the tornado.  Joker (2019) admittedly plays the material much differently, in that all the way through we are supposed to sympathize with Arthur Fleck and stand alongside him every step of this of his downward spiral, and even with where he ends up, I’ll admit I don’t have an issue with that, but the film struggles with making me care half the time.  Like, yes, when Arthur is alone at home trying not to go awol, yeah, I get that, but at other times there’s stuff like how Arthur’s relationship with Sophie is never developed in any meaningful capacity, like why is enamored with him, why is she not as disturbed by him as most other people seem to be?  When we discover she’s not real, that explains it from a logical perspective I guess, but it isn’t a shock or a gut punch.

Can I be real for a second?  There are a lot of moments in this film where it made me embarrased as a neurodivergent person.  The number of people who definitely saw this, because, once again, it made a billion dollars, and came away thinking oh so that’s what mentally ill people are like, even if they’re sympathetic about it, it makes me sigh.

Even though the crux of this film is Arthur’s descent, it desperately wants to be important.  I know I’m not the first person to make this observation, but it does read like, oh, what’s popular now?  Incels?  Better make part of Arthur’s character arc that he can’t hit up any actual real women so he has to entertain himself with fantasies.  Antifa?  Better make it so Arthur accidentally inspires a movement of nebulous anti-rich people who all wear masks.  And so on and so on with no actual commentary while simultaneously it’s not really world-building either because it’s so front and center to the plot. I gotta say, if the film is about people in general not putting up with things anymore after being shat on nonstop, why oh why is there a joke aimed at a little person pretty early on, even through some meta lense where “oh the person telling the joke is an asshat who dies later so it’s cool”?

Now I’m not sure what to say next about the film itself so I guess now would be a good time to discuss the film’s ~impact~ as it were.  If it weren’t for Parasite (2019) I’d have no problem saying this was the biggest film of 2019 in the grand scheme of things, like EVERYONE came in with every possible perspective on this thing long before it came out.  I remember how back in like, late-2017/early-2018?  A bunch of people were shitting on the announcement of this film and Warner Bros had to do damage control by releasing some on-set photos of the second subway scene two days later.  It’s surreal more than anything actually watching this film now and seeing, wait, this is what everyone was memeing about nonstop?  This is a mainstream film?  With the directions it goes in?  With the topics it brings up?  Well I’ll be damned.  This is probably the first time since Les Miserables (2013) and Man of Steel (2013) where a movie comes out and no two people have the exact same opinion on it, so I’m curious as to how Joker is going to age in like, a decade.  So fucking weird that this is called a “superhero film” in retrospect just because it shares a name with a comic book character owned by the same company that developed and distributed this.

I wouldn’t be talking about this film if it wasn’t called “Joker” but then again hey nobody else would either.  I don’t hate this film despite how I’ve said nothing positive about and I was pretty prepared to call it “barely good” before the finale, so I don’t regret watching it, I don’t know what the fuck to say anymore.  Gang Weed memes are pretty funny if you haven’t actually seen any in the wild.  1940: “Let’s throw him into chemicals.”  2019: “Let’s throw him into society.”

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 6x06 All the Way

aka not much for the timber

Welcome to this dailyish text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and go on an impromptu rant about it for an hour. Is it about one hyperspecific thing or twenty observations? 10 or 3k words? You don’t know! I don’t know!!! In this house we don’t know things.

And today’s episode is mostly Dawn-centric and immensely entertaining with a lot of fun bits… up until the moment it’s not. (That’ll be a YIKES from me, @ Willow.)

Truth be told, All the Way took me by a bit of a surprise, because for some reason I misremembered Dawn’s Halloween adventures as a season 7 plot. (It may be the influence of another episode, Him, although that episode is memorable to me for all the wrong reasons.)

But yeah, Dawn sneaking out, and accidentally hooking up with a vampire happens, and I actually kind of love it? Especially the scene with Buffy, where her and Dawn argue about their questionable choices in men. It’s an absolute delight, and Dawn being immediately turned off by the fact that her vamp boo, Justin, thinks that her sister being the Slayer is what makes her special, is just the cherry on top.

And this kind of wonderful banter rooted in the characters and their dynamics, is carried through the whole episode. The opening alone just filled me with joy. Tara interrupting Anya’s accidental inappropriateness in front of Dawn, and then somehow folding it into a lesbian joke. Willow’s outrage at inauthentic witch costumes melting in the face of a tiny child wearing the same. Xander amping up the ridiculousness of his pirate affectation for the sake of some kids, and being absolutely unafraid of being mocked by them. (Also, the eye-patch…) Giles being a sarcastic asshole about Xander to Buffy with later revealing the reason behind his glass-cleaning habits, and making meta commentary about how if something happens on Halloween, it’ll involve them anyway – much to Buffy’s chagrin, who was trying to quietly take off under the pretense of patrolling, instead of helping out with the wrapping. She also laments how much easier it has been to talk with Spike when he was trying to kill her all the time.

At the end of the day, Anya is extremely happy with all the traffic they had at the shop, and seeing her enthusiasm apparently momentarily wakes Xander up from his fear of commitment, just enough to announce their engagement. Only for him to get once again absolutely overwhelmed by everything, once they start talking about the whole marriage thing. (Hey, Xander, isn’t that supposed to be the whole idea of getting engaged?)

Oh, boy. But there’ll be time enough to analyze Xander’s issues, and how I sympathize with them. (I know, hot take. Except for the part of how he’s handling the post-Hell Bells situation, because that I do not have an excuse for. Own your baggage and the damage you inflict with it, my dude.)

Xander and Anya’s relationship isn’t the only one with cracks appearing in it though. Nope, this is also the episode where Tara starts seriously questioning Willow’s practices, and it gets… bad. It’s real bad.

Okay, so, it starts off rather innocently. Willow does a spell to decorate the house for the engagement party. Tara and Giles share a look, and Tara later gently tries to broach the subject with Willow, that maybe she didn’t need to do a spell for that. They could’ve just bought the decorations if they wanted.

Now, truthfully, the spell itself is rather harmless. Sure, when it comes to house party decorations, part of the fun is the decorating itself, but Anya liked it, and she and Xander are the ones this party is about anyway. But Willow’s defensiveness shows the underlining problem – she has absolutely no restraint or hang-ups about using magic in any situation. And given the amount of power she wields now, and her already existing character traits of wanting to mold the world to her liking, that’s a bit concerning.

Using magic to solve her problems is not a new phenomenon for Willow. Remember, in season 3 she tried to do a “delusting” spell on her and Xander without his knowledge or consent. And in Something Blue, her spell was supposed to cure her heartache in a moment’s notice.

Those spells of course misfired, and so we were mostly left with sympathy for Willow in these instances. I mean, who wouldn’t want to just poof their confusing, self-destructive impulses and pain away? But we can’t. The only way out is through.

Except Willow actually has the power now to change reality to her liking. She could phase hundreds of people into another dimension, just to make finding Dawn easier. Sure, it’s a ridiculous amount of risk for such a small convenience, and obviously no one at the club consented to it, but she can do it. More notably, she absolutely would do it.

Previously I commented about how Giles seemed to have told no one about his confrontation with Willow in 6x03, but he may have talked to someone about it after all – Tara. At the very least, Willow certainly thinks that’s the case.

And Willow deep down knows that she’s out of line. That’s why she’s so defensive, and why she didn’t reveal all the details of the resurrection spell. But she doesn’t want to confront those things about herself, and thanks to her powers, she doesn’t have to. She can just poof things away to avoid that.

She can just change Tara to her liking, so she wouldn’t bring it up.

YIKES. SO MANY YIKES.

So, yeah guys. This is it. Our second major storyline involving highly problematic consent.

Well, Buffy essentially is always fighting the rape metaphor, but as I mentioned in my Who Are You? post, there are three plotlines that especially stand out in that respect. Not just because they involve major characters as the victims, but as the actual perpetrators.

This case resembles more the previous instance with Faith and Riley, in that it’s an issue of a lack of informed consent due to magical circumstances. As a result, it may be easier to somewhat detach it from a real world analogue as a viewer, but it’s still what happens. So we’ll need to address it as such.

I will say though, that this storyline at least recognizes its own yikes factor, as opposed to how Riley’s situation is handled. (A reminder: poorly.) Part of it is “helped” by the fact that Tara already has experience in what a controlling environment is. So once she finds out that Willow messed with her memories, she absolutely fucking refuses to let her get away with it. (“I can’t adjust to this, disgust, we’re done…”)

But that’s for tomorrow and after.

Now, since we’re already at the subject, we could also mention the rapey-ness of the high school vamps, but this is nothing new. Again, that’s sort of the point. Buffy is fighting the patriarchy and rape culture, that’s the most obvious metaphor of the vampires throughout the entire series.

The fact that Dawn’s vamp boo seemed nicer than his friend, Mr. “She asked for it”, also reminded me of Reptile Boy. Although, in that case, the nice guy was revealed to be a conniving snake, whereas Justin seemed arguably clueless somewhat about his own predatory aspects. Almost as if he was socialized to think that it was normal to pressure girls into sex, if he was nice about it and maybe even genuinely liked the girls in question…

The episode also ends with Buffy transferring her responsibilities regarding Dawn to Giles. And while regarding the financial problems, I maintain that Giles bailing out Buffy and Dawn was the least he could’ve done, this is where he should’ve set his boundaries.

Alas, that didn’t happen, and no one seems to be aware yet of Dawn’s little stealing problem either.

So, there. That was All the Way. Please take care of yourselves and be mindful of your fellow humans.

[emeraldspiral]

Real talk, the only reason Anakin had to go to Jedi school to git gud is because he needed to be a kid when he left his mom and an adult when he began his romance with Padme. If the plot had called for it, he would’ve been a Master Jedi in a week because the needs of the story outweigh the need for “realism”.

Just look at Luke. His training lasted maybe a couple of days or weeks at most because it just wouldn’t make sense for Luke to stay out of the fight for years and years. He could only train for as long as it took Han and Leia to get captured by Vader, but he also needed to not instantly lose to Vader when they fought. Therefore, the amount of time it took for Han and Leia’s storyline to play out was the exact amount of time Luke needed to get good enough to face Vader.

Afterward, in RotJ, supposedly there’s a timeskip of a year, but you’d be forgiven if you thought, as I did, that only a few days or weeks passed, since there’s 0 mention of a timeskip in the film and no reason to think it would take that long to get to Tatooine or plan Han’s rescue. In fact, it seems out of character for a dedicated Rebel like Leia to take that much time off for one person, no matter how she felt about him. But I digress. Regardless of whether it was really a year or only a few days, the fact remains that Luke didn’t have any additional training during that timeskip. He only returned to Dagobah after rescuing Han, and upon arrival Yoda was on his deathbed telling Luke he was already ready, no additional Force training or lightsaber combat instruction required.

In any event, however much training he received, it was definitely significantly under ten years and, from what we saw, didn’t even cover lightsaber fencing, at least not nearly as much as lifting rocks and reading minds and other Force skills. Yet, he still managed to overpower Vader, the strongest Jedi/Sith to ever live. Because the story required him to be that powerful at that point so that he could complete his arc by rejecting the opportunity to slay Vader.

Now, let’s consider Rey’s skills, abilities, and accomplishments, starting with the dumbest of the dumbshit things people complain about when trying to use the “she’s too good at too many things/gets too good too fast” argument for why she’s a Mary-Sue.

First of all:

Why does Rey speak droid and Wookie (as if that’s a particularly uncommon skill)? Because she needs to befriend BB-8, so BB-8 can bring her together with Finn and because someone’s got to be able to understand Chewie once Han’s gone and that someone should probably be the one who’s going to be spending a lot of time alone with him co-piloting the Falcon when they go to find Luke. The better question to ask is why anyone cares about shit like that? Like, is that on some Mary-Sue litmus test somewhere? “Is bilingual in a world where most people are?” If you’re going to complain about something that stupid I have to assume you think character writing should work like Pokemon where you have to drop traits in order to stay under a certain limit, even if half the stuff filling up the quota is stuff like “can ride a bicycle” or “doesn’t burn the house down when they cook”.

Second:

Why is she an ace pilot (as if half the characters in Star Wars, both Force sensitive and non-Force sensitive aren’t also Ace Pilots, and also as if Rey has more than ONE SINGLE flying scene or had any trouble handing over the spotlight to any of the other THREE ACE PILOTS JUST IN THE SEQUEL TRILOGY)? Because she has to be a pilot because Finn can’t be, because he had to need Poe so that he could get his jacket, in order to catch BB-8′s attention, so that BB-8 could bring him and Rey together. Also, because it emphasizes Rey’s major character flaw; that she is the architect of her own misery. She has the means to leave Jakku but doesn’t, something directly acknowledged immediately after her one and only flying scene.

Third:

Why does she show Han up on knowledge of his own ship? Well, for one thing, she fucking doesn’t. She only knows about one thing installed in the ship after it left his custody. But even if you wanted to make the claim that this was supposed to demonstrate that she was some kind of Superstar Mechanic (as if mechanics are something rare and special in Star Wars) and that the reason for her being a Superstar Mechanic is just to get Han to like her, even that has a story-related justification that isn’t just about wish-fulfillment or using a cool character to shill for her. Having Han take a liking to her creates another opportunity for her to demonstrate her character flaw when she rejects his job offer in favor of returning to Jakku to wait forever for parents that don’t love her when there’s a man she already thinks of as the father she never had right in front of her. Also, having her bond with him makes his death at Kylo’s hands more personal for her, thereby creating a greater hurdle for her to overcome in order to come to have compassion for Kylo, making it more satisfying when she does.

Fourth:

Why does she have the Force when she’s already a pilot, mechanic, and proficient stick-fighter (as if any of those things are unique or special. Or more importantly, ever used at the expense of letting other characters shine)? Couldn’t she have been a Badass Normal? If this were just about beating bad guys and winning the war maybe. But it’s clearly not. This is about the old heroes passing the torch to the next generation. The main character was always going to be Force sensitive, always going to become a Jedi, and always going to replace Luke no matter what gender they were, who they were related to, whether they were a scavenger or a stormtrooper or secret royalty or Born of the Force or who, if anyone, they were going to be romantically partnered with. Rey needs to be Force sensitive because, as the main character, her ultimate purpose is to define what it means to be a Jedi for a new generation.

Fifth:

Why can she do things with the Force without training? Well, the only reason Luke needed a training montage was because the Force was a brand new concept for him and he was limited by his own ideas about his capabilities, and because the audience was going in blind as well and needed to hear the Force 101 lectures just as much as he did. Rey meanwhile, has no reason to think lifting rocks or picking up a lightsaber hilt is hard when she’s grown up hearing stories about Luke doing much crazier things. Between that, having Kylo demonstrate all those abilities to her beforehand, and also being able to access his training through the Force Bond there is 0 reason for her to need a training montage in-universe. But more importantly, because the audience has already gotten a crash course on standard Force abilities from the previous movies, a training montage would be redundant. We don’t need the same exposition given to us again anymore than we need to see Rey repeat the same character journey as Luke. The Force Bond and Rey’s preexisting fighting capabilities may be a convenient workaround to explain why Rey doesn’t need a training montage, but they exist because a training montage would be dead weight that adds nothing to the story. And that’s just the Force Bond’s ancillary purpose. Its much more important function is getting Rey and Kylo to stop fighting and start talking.

Sixth:

Why couldn’t Rey and Kylo at least fight to a draw or better yet, have her forced to retreat in their first battle? Why did she have to beat him at the very beginning of her journey? Doesn’t that make her too powerful with no room for advancement and him too weak, leaving no tension for future confrontations?

Because Kylo’s defeat isn’t about Rey at all. It’s not about making her look good. Kylo’s supposed to be at his lowest point going into TLJ. He’s supposed to look weak, not because the screenwriters think it’ll make Rey look stronger in comparison. They know damn well that the way to write a villain is to present them as an impossible obstacle to overcome. To hide any semblance of vulnerability in order to keep you in suspense as to how the hero could ever prevail against them. But that’s not Rey and Kylo’s dynamic. That’s Kylo and Snoke’s dynamic. Kylo isn’t the villain, he’s the “other half of the protagonist”. He doesn’t exist for Rey to be afraid of him. She’s meant to sympathize with him, which means he needs to appear vulnerable and human in front of her. They couldn’t build the romantic (or even platonic) connection the film clearly intended for them if Kylo actually did come across as threatening as people wanted him to be. The appearance of physical or emotional invincibility would be antithetical to the entire story they’re trying to tell.

Also, Rey isn’t even that good with a lightsaber. Kylo had been shot with a bowcaster, injured further and tired out by Finn, and handicapped himself by not aiming to kill or maim since he wanted to recruit Rey to his side and Rey still spent 98% of that fight running and only won because Kylo chose not to kill her when he had the chance.

Believe it or not, some dumbasses have actually heard all this and still tried to argue that Rey shouldn’t be in any fighting shape after hitting a tree hard enough to lose consciousness and that should nullify all the advantages she was given. If you make this argument, you’re being an anal contrarian fuck and you know it. Getting hit in the head is NEVER portrayed realistically in fiction. It is completely standard and in no way exceptional for a fictional character to awake from unconsciousness with no impairments. It has fuck all to do with trying to make characters look cool. It never has been and never will be a Mary-Sue trope.

In conclusion:

None of Rey’s abilities or feats are just there to make her look good. They’re either there to move the story along, or to add to her characterization and character journey, or to add to Kylo’s. Furthermore, they’re nothing special in the context of Star Wars, the stuff she learns quickly has in-universe justifications and it’s not even unprecedented for characters to git gud enough to match someone more experienced in a very short amount of time with no in-universe justification.