#it wreaks havoc on air quality

[quaranmine]

Well, it seems to me that the combination of me typing IWGttEoB and the wildfire smoke going over my house had finally affected my dreams because I just woke up from a dream where Mumbo is the fire watch lookout and Gem was the Thorofare Lookout. Yes poor Mumbo was a pathetic wet cat in my dream while Gem is teasingly telling Mumbo to 'get it together over the radio-

LOL! That would be an interesting AU of the story, honestly. I think their dynamic would be a lot of fun and Gem would make a good candidate for a fire lookout. Mumbo? Wellllllll....that's why Gem is teasing him in your dream

I quite often dream about fandom things and fanfiction, I think. Do I remember any of these enough to tell you about them? Sadly not

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello Miss Raven!✨💕

I would like to ask you for an imagine/scenario or character interaction with Crewel and Vil (platonic ofc), where they talk about fashion and everything like the queens they are and they just always have the hottest tea! Talking about the school etc.

It's a casual fic idea without any angst or things like that, maybe somewhere along the way they start talking about Yuu who's Vil's friend, that he has a bit of a crush on? It may start at the Vil's alchemy lesson or smth-

Anyways, the main focus is hot tea between the fashion queens🙏👑 Thank you!💖

This interaction takes place after the events of book 6, so there will be spoilers for that.

I kept the “Vil has a crush on Yuu” element out of this particular interaction since I didn’t find it super relevant 💦 I want the focus of this blog event to be Crewel and his relationships with others. Maybe if the interaction had been posed like Vil coming to Crewel for love advice (since Crewel is a trusted adult for him), it could have fit better. Either that, or I’d advise waiting for more generalized writing requests to open ^^

If he doesn’t scare you, no evil thing will.

“Crewel-sensei.”

He turned at the call of his voice. “Schoenheit.”

Vil, dressed in his labwear, approached. A beaker of a bubbling substance carefully was ferried in his gloved hand, which he offered to his instructor. “The Peddler’s Disguise is done. You may evaluate it for its quality.”

Crewel accepted the potion, gently swirling it to test the viscosity and noting the color.

“It was brewed with mummy dust, black of night, an old hag’s cackle, and a scream of fright. I then churned over high heat with a blast of wind and a thunderbolt.”

"You've memorized the recipe. Excellent work." Crewel set the beaker down on a lab bench and marked off Vil's name on a clipboard. "You're making up for lost time at a record pace."

"Of course. There is no excuse for falling behind," Vil insisted, tossing his blonde hair over one shoulder.

Crewel quirked a brow. "Not even being kidnapped? How strong-minded of you. I was surprised when you came to me asking to hit the ground running with makeup classes upon your return.”

He looked Vil up and down. “You remain put-together for someone who has gone through an event most would consider unsettling. Is it your PR training keeping you cool in the public eye?”

Vil folded his arms. "... If you're trying to be subtle with your worries, then you're doing a poor job of it, sensei.”

"And is there a problem with a teacher having concern for his student?”

“No, not at all.” A smirk flickered onto Vil’s lips. “Then shall we drop the pretenses? Though so bear in mind that I am under a strict NDA, so I can only divulge so many details.”

“Let’s,” Crewel agreed. “I presume you cannot share the bulk of your harrowing experience.”

Vil nodded. “But fortunately, I can tell about the worst of it… The atrocious lack of attention to self care!!”

“Our school uniforms were taken away and we were made to wear the same sterile grey uniforms every day. Threads as thin as hospital gowns, collared like misbehaved mongrels… Why, it was the worst injustice I faced in that facility.

“Not only that, but the air in the enclosure was stale and terribly drying.” Vil patted his cheek and shuddered at the memory. “It wreaked havoc on my skin.

“Worse still was that I was denied access to any skincare products and cosmetics! I was told that they were a safety hazard and to ‘rinse off with water and soap and go bare faced for a while, what are you aggro’ing about’!! Can you believe the GALL?! I was just about ready to let the staff have my wrath.”

Vil paused, taking a breath to calm himself. “… I was only saved thanks to a gaggle of nosy potatoes and a certain huntsman.”

“Speaking of, Hunt caused quite the stir at school when he vanished. Pomefiore was already suffering without its dorm leader and expected its vice dorm leader to step up fill that role in your stead… but with Hunt mysteriously gone, Pomefiore was without anyone in charge.”

“As I rightfully scolded him for.” Vil sighed deeply. "I was informed that Trein-sensei served as acting headmaster while the situation was unfolding. How did he address the issue of Pomefiore's missing leadership?"

"You're looking right at him," Crewel replied with a dry laugh. "I was called in to supervise the dormitory on top of my usual teaching duties. It seems the old man... excuse me, I mean my esteemed colleague, decided to put his faith in his favorite ex-troublemaker. Who was I to deny him?

"For the time Hunt and his rescue squad were away, I stayed at Pomefiore and kept watch over its students. What a mess—there are hardly time for my personal upkeep, nor a moment to steal away and seek the comfort of my beloved dogs... My clothes were horribly creased and my hair unkempt when the news first broke of your return.”

"What a harrowing tale of sacrifice. I apologize for the inconvenience my vice dorm leader imposed on you. He'll be getting another earful from me.”

“Hmph, no need. Though it was an inconvenience at the time, I am glad to see that you’ve come back to us safe snd sound. Perhaps it is not so bad for you pups to act selfishly every now and again.”

“Oh? Careful, Crewel-sensei. We may just take that as the green light to behave even more selfishly.”

“Then I will be there to keep you in line."

"Is that so? I'll be holding you accountable to that promise."

"And I'll be holding you accountable for your dorm's students," Crewel promised with the same ease as Vil.

There was a mutual understanding between them, the same spark set in their eyes. Teacher and student, fashionista and fashionista.

Together, they radiated an overwhelming aura.

[infamous-light]

Captured Part IV

Dark! Wandanat x Villain/Mutant! F! Reader

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3

AO3: Captured

Summary: You and your mutant friends have been in hiding due to the havoc you all wreaked over the past few years. One day, you all decided to make your presence known and rob one of the largest federal reserve banks in the U.S.

Unfortunately, things did not go as planned for you.

Word count: 2.3K

Warnings: Mind manipulation, kidnapping

The soft rays of the first morning light, like a delicate brushstroke, filtered through the curtains, creating a mesmerizing dance of shadows on the walls. The bedroom seemed to come alive with subtle warmth as if the sun itself was gently caressing the entire space. As you gradually opened your eyes, the bedroom came into focus, and the events of the past day lingered in the air like a dream, though their details were veiled behind some sort of invisible haze.

The beginnings of a headache had crept in as you tried to piece together the fragments of your recent memory. It was as if a fog had settled over your thoughts and each attempt to recall any details brought forth a dull throb across your temples.

As you continued to awaken, the ambient sounds from outside the bedroom window seeped into your awareness – the distant chirping of birds, the gentle rustle of leaves in the breeze, and the liquid melody of a nearby stream. The bright colors of the bedroom took on a dreamlike quality, with the pastel hues of the walls and furnishings appearing more vibrant.

Once you sat up in bed, the door creaked open, and Wanda entered with a warm smile on her face.

“Good morning. I hope you had a restful night." Her voice was pleasant but there was a subtle undertone of amusement that went unnoticed by you.

Your response was hesitant, your mind still grappling with the fog of confusion. "Good morning." You managed to mumble.

Wanda moved across the bedroom and sat down next to you on the bed.

"Such a sleepyhead," she teased, playfully tousling your hair. "Come on, rise and shine. There’s breakfast waiting for you in the kitchen, and I thought you might want to join us. Natasha’s currently setting the table.”

You blinked a few times, attempting to shake off the remnants of sleep. “Uh, yeah. I’ll join you two in a few minutes.”

“Ok, but don’t take too long. Breakfast won’t wait for you forever.” With that, she leaned in and planted a sweet, unexpected kiss on your right cheek.

The tenderness of it left you momentarily breathless as a cascade of emotions played out within you – surprise and a hint of vulnerability. Wanda’s lips curled into a smirk as she observed your reaction. Her fingers trailed over your cheek for a moment before she pulled away. She left the bedroom and closed the door on her way out. Only the subtle scent of her perfume lingered behind.

You snapped out of the daze you were in and swung your legs over the side of the bed, making your way to the bathroom. Once inside, the mirror revealed a face still marked by sleep. As you gazed at your reflection, something uneasy overcame you, a mysterious force shrouding the edges of your consciousness.

With a hesitant hand, you reached for the faucet, allowing a stream of cool water to spiral into the sink below. Your eyes met their own reflection once more, seeking answers to the discomfort that had settled low in your gut. You splashed water on your face, but it did little to dispel the nagging feeling that scraped against your mind like talons.

After finishing your morning routine and with your undergarments in place, you selected a plain navy blue shirt from a neatly organized wardrobe. Its soft fabric embraced your skin as you slipped it on. Next, you opted for a pair of comfortable grey sweatpants that you had stumbled upon while rifling through the drawers. Its snug fit provided the perfect balance between casual and relaxed.

Heading toward the kitchen, the savory aroma of sizzling bacon wafted through the air, its enticing fragrance mingling with the rich, buttery scent of eggs. It made your stomach growl in anticipation. Upon entering, your eyebrows rose at the spread before you.

On the porcelain plates, golden-brown pancakes were stacked high while each layer was adorned with a pat of melting butter. The edges of the pancakes boasted a perfect crispness while the centers promised a fluffy tenderness. Nestled beside the pancakes were eggs cooked to perfection – sunny-side up, their yolks like liquid sunshine ready to burst forth at the slightest prod. The bacon was also expertly prepared. Each strip exuded a smoky aroma that mixed well with the rest of the food. Completing the breakfast set, there was a pitcher of freshly squeezed orange juice placed in the middle of the table.

Wanda motioned for you to take a seat. "Come on. Sit with us.”

"I hope you like your eggs sunny side up." Natasha said, her eyes twinkling with mirth.

Grateful for the unexpected treat, you gave them a small smile as you sat down at the table. "This looks amazing. Thank you."

As you took your first bite, the eggs melted in your mouth, and the burst of flavors from the seasoning complemented the dish perfectly. You couldn't help but express your delight.

"This is incredible.”

Natasha smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.”

After finishing a fulfilling breakfast, Wanda and Natasha exchanged glances with each other, seemingly satisfied that you had eaten everything on your plate.

Wanda, with a cheerful demeanor, suggested, “How about we all watch a movie together?”

Your lips curved into a genuine expression of joy and you nodded in excitement.

“Wonderful.” Wanda remarked.

The rest of the day settled into a subdued ambiance as the three of you found yourselves in the living room, nestled together on the plush couch that was littered with an assortment of cushions and throws.

Wanda sat on one end of the couch, leaning against the armrest while Natasha sat to your left, leaving you in the middle of the couch.

As the plot of the movie thickened, Natasha edged closer to you. Her movements were smooth and unassuming, yet the warmth emanating from her presence was palpable. In a tender moment, she playfully nudged your arm, silently expressing a desire for a closer connection.

You turned your head to face Natasha, meeting her eyes with a questioning look. Without a word, she scooted even closer and draped her arm around your shoulder, pulling you into her side. The comfort of her body drew you in and your head instinctively nestled in the crook of her neck, a position that felt surprisingly natural despite the unfamiliarity of the situation. Her fingers threaded through your hair and in that moment, time seemed to slow down.

Wanda noticed and couldn’t help but smile. Seizing the moment, she shifted closer, joining the cuddle session. Her touch added an extra layer of warmth.

Just as the movie reached a suspenseful climax, the room was interrupted by the sudden ringtone of Natasha's phone. The sound caused you to jump, your attention torn away from the TV screen. Natasha frowned, reaching for the phone in her jeans pocket. Its bright screen cast a brief glow against her features.

Without uttering a word, Natasha exchanged a knowing look with Wanda that left you puzzled. Natasha sighed and turned her gaze toward you.

"Stay here," Natasha said, her tone carrying both reassurance and a sense of urgency. "We'll be right back."

Wanda disentangled herself from you but not before giving your hand a quick, comforting squeeze and rose to her feet. They left the living room, leaving you alone on the couch. As Wanda and Natasha ventured down the hallway, their voices became muffled whispers.

With the movie still playing in the background, you made a valiant attempt to focus on the plot unfolding on the screen. However, your attention wavered, and an insatiable curiosity about the secretive phone call tugged at your thoughts. Unable to resist any longer, you kicked the many blankets off yourself and got up.

You made your way to the door, your hand grasping the cold metal handle. The hinges let out a faint creak as you eased it open. Silently, you stepped past the threshold, carefully closing the door behind you to avoid any unnecessary noise.

The soft carpet beneath your feet absorbed the slightest of sounds, turning each step into a near-silent dance across the floor. The hushed voices became more distinct as you approached the source. The sound seemed to originate from a room at the end of the hall, drawing you closer with each carefully placed step. Straining your ears, you could have sworn that your name was being said.

As you reached the partially open door, you peeked past the doorframe, catching a glimpse of Natasha engaged in a seemingly intense phone call. Natasha, her brow furrowed in concentration, held the phone to her ear while gesturing emphatically with her free hand. Wanda, on the other hand, leaned against a table, her keen eyes focused on a distant point in the room.

“I know, Steve!” Natasha’s tone was sharp, cutting through the tension in the room like a knife. “As for now, Wanda and I have her under control. She’s not an immediate threat to anyone. Once we find out where the rest of her friends are, we’ll send her over to you, alright?”

You stand frozen in disbelief as Natasha's words rang in your ears, her voice slicing right through you like an icy blade. The revelation sent shivers down your spine, and a knot tightened in the pit of your stomach. You searched for some sign that this was all some twisted joke, but Natasha's unwavering gaze and the gravity in her words crushed any hope of that.

Your mind raced, trying to make sense of the situation. Just then, a wave of disorientation hit you like a two-ton truck. Your immediate surroundings, once stable, seemed to warp around the edges. It was as if reality itself was playing tricks on your mind.

Wanda's face materialized right before you. A cruel smirk aimed directly at you.

Swirling magnetic red emanated from her eyes. The intensity of her gaze pierced through the very fabric of your being.

Then, in the shadowy backdrop, a black mass shifted behind Wanda.

Natasha now stood above you, her presence casting a chilling shadow. Her gaze was cold, devoid of any warmth as she stared down at you.

“You’ll never break me!”

A voice rang out. It sounded familiar but you struggled to place it.

“We’ll see.”

The response was murmured. Calculated.

The hallway around you seemed to spin as you were brought back to the present. The abrupt transition had you struggling to regain your bearings and you clung to the nearby wall for support. The relentless surge of pain that radiated from your skull intensified with each passing moment and you clamped a trembling hand over your mouth, desperate to stifle the pained groan threatening to escape.

You didn’t want to alert Natasha and Wanda of your presence, uncertain about how they would react to you eavesdropping on their conversation.

A frustrated huff sounded from the room and your attention snapped back to the two women once more. Natasha placed the phone back in her pocket as she began to pace back and forth.

“I should’ve known Steve was going to find out sooner than later.” Natasha muttered, her voice tinged with a mix of exasperation and concern.

“I’m guessing someone at HQ snitched on us.” Wanda said with a roll of her eyes.

“Yeah, and he’s pretty adamant about having her confined under their supervision. His reasoning is that he wants to expedite her trial.” Natasha explained, her irritation palpable as she paused in the middle of the room.

“We can’t let that happen.”Wanda asserted as she took a step closer to the assassin.

“I know.”

Wanda's brow furrowed as she stood there, deep in thought, the gears of her mind turning with a cunning intensity. A few seconds had passed before Wanda's eyes sparkled with a hint of mischief as a devious idea took shape in her head.

“I have an idea,” she said. "Let’s fake her death.”

Natasha, intrigued, arched a curious eyebrow at her. “Alright, let’s hear it.”

Your eyes widened at her words and apprehension began to churn in your gut. The air felt charged with an unsettling energy.

"How about we arrange for her to be transported in one of those high-security prisoner trucks. During the transfer, we stage a crash – nothing too crazy, just enough to make it look fatal. We'll have emergency services and the media involved, creating a narrative that she died in the accident." Wanda continued, her mind already working out the intricate details. "We can use the chaos and confusion to discreetly move her to where we want, away from prying eyes.”

Natasha sighed as she folded her arms across her chest. “They’re not going to buy that. S.H.I.E.L.D is too skeptical and you can bet they'll dig deep into the details.” The room fell into a thoughtful silence, broken only by the rhythmic tapping of her fingers against her bicep.

“Then what should we do?” Wanda asked.

"What if we let her escape?" Natasha suggested, her gaze narrowing with intent. “You could use your powers to create an illusion, make it look like she died by your hand.”

"That's risky." Wanda said in a measured tone. "But it's doable."

“Good. We can discuss the details later.” Natasha concluded. “We should get back to her and see how she’s doing.”

A sense of uneasiness lodged itself in the pit of your stomach as you moved away from the door. The hallway seemed like it was closing in on you. It was becoming harder and harder to breathe.

Natasha and Wanda weren’t what they seemed. It became evident that their sweet demeanor was a mask, concealing intentions and motives that were far from benevolent.

A decision loomed – you needed to get out of here.

[bigsoftmarshmallow]

In the world of Pokemon, what Pokemon would be part of Ganondorfs (Wind Waker, Ocarina of Time, Twilight Princess, Hyrule Warriors, and Tears of the Kingdom) & Demise's team?

Ganondorf and Demise are power-hungry rulers with dark, imposing personas, so their Pokémon teams would reflect their dominant, destructive, and regal natures. Each version of Ganondorf has unique qualities, which can be represented through carefully selected Pokémon, while Demise’s team would embody pure primal power.

Wind Waker Ganondorf’s Pokémon Team

Gyarados (Water/Flying)

Gyarados, a sea monster known for its rage and destructive nature, mirrors Wind Waker Ganondorf’s mastery of the seas and his tempestuous personality. Both are associated with vast oceans and terrifying power.

Honchkrow (Dark/Flying)

Honchkrow, known as the "Big Boss" Pokémon, suits Wind Waker Ganondorf's role as a calculated, patient villain. Honchkrow is cunning, loyal to its mob, and exudes an air of quiet menace, which matches Ganondorf’s demeanor in Wind Waker.

Sharpedo (Water/Dark)

Sharpedo represents Ganondorf’s pirate-like nature, cutting through the seas with ferocity. Its sharp fangs and ruthless attacks echo Ganondorf’s conquest across the Great Sea.

Aegislash (Steel/Ghost)

Aegislash represents Ganondorf’s ancient ties to the past and the legends of Hyrule. A living sword and shield, Aegislash embodies honor and power, but also hints at Ganondorf’s dark legacy and connection to ancient battles.

Lunala (Psychic/Ghost)** - Legendary**

Lunala’s ghostly, bat-like form and connection to the moon fits the ethereal and mysterious atmosphere of Wind Waker’s world. Lunala’s ability to tap into the night and moonlight embodies Ganondorf’s subtle, looming presence, always watching and planning from the shadows.

Ocarina of Time Ganondorf’s Pokémon Team

Hydreigon (Dark/Dragon)

Hydreigon’s relentless destructive tendencies and tyrannical behavior make it perfect for Ocarina of Time Ganondorf. The three-headed dragon wreaks havoc like Ganondorf does, leaving destruction in its wake as a force of chaos and evil.

Tyranitar (Rock/Dark)

Tyranitar is a fearsome beast known for causing landslides and destroying entire mountains—just as Ganondorf brings devastation to Hyrule. Its sheer strength and unrelenting nature reflect the force Ganondorf brings to his enemies.

Cofagrigus (Ghost)

Cofagrigus, an ancient sarcophagus Pokémon, symbolizes Ganondorf’s connection to the past, the ancient Gerudo tribe, and his transformation into the Demon King. It’s haunting and embodies a cursed, dark history.

Giratina (Origin Forme) (Ghost/Dragon) - Legendary

Giratina’s association with antimatter, the Distortion World, and its rebellious nature against the creator of its universe makes it perfect for Ocarina of Time Ganondorf. Giratina represents his desire to reshape Hyrule in his own image and his dark ambitions to overthrow the gods themselves.

Houndoom (Dark/Fire)

Houndoom, with its hellish design and fiery attacks, mirrors Ganondorf’s malevolent aura. It evokes fear, just as Ganondorf does, and its loyalty to its master mirrors the power Ganondorf commands over his forces.

Twilight Princess Ganondorf’s Pokémon Team

Dusknoir (Ghost)

Dusknoir, the Grim Reaper-like Pokémon, suits Twilight Princess Ganondorf’s sinister and dark design. Dusknoir’s role as a soul guide to the afterlife represents Ganondorf’s control over dark, unnatural forces.

Zoroark (Dark)

Zoroark’s illusion ability mirrors Ganondorf’s manipulative side and how he often tricks others, like Zant, into doing his bidding. It fits Ganondorf’s role as a schemer hiding in the shadows, pulling strings until the time is right.

Golurk (Ground/Ghost)

Golurk is a towering, ancient construct bound by ancient magic, much like Ganondorf’s own connection to dark magic. Its heavy, earth-shattering attacks suit Twilight Princess Ganondorf’s brutal approach to power.

Darkrai (Dark) - Legendary

Darkrai is a nightmare-inducing Pokémon, making it perfect for the version of Ganondorf that revels in darkness and terror. Its presence in the shadows and ability to bring nightmares fits perfectly with Twilight Princess Ganondorf’s twisted and cruel ambitions.

Weavile (Dark/Ice)

Weavile’s swift, cunning strikes and sharp, icy claws mirror Ganondorf’s cold and calculating nature. It’s a fast, strategic attacker that embodies his sharp intellect and ruthlessness.

Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf’s Pokémon Team

Zekrom (Dragon/Electric) - Legendary

Zekrom, a Pokémon that represents ideals and immense destructive power, aligns with Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf’s ambitious and larger-than-life presence. Zekrom’s power of lightning and its connection to ancient legends are fitting for Ganondorf’s godlike status.

Volcarona (Bug/Fire)

Volcarona, the sun Pokémon, aligns with the burning passion and destructive fire that Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf brings to the battlefield. It’s a Pokémon tied to legendary status and ancient myths, just like Ganondorf.

Bisharp (Dark/Steel)

Bisharp, a sharp and ruthless fighter with a knight-like appearance, embodies Ganondorf’s tactical prowess and leadership in commanding armies. Its dual types reflect his cunning strategies combined with brute strength.

Conkeldurr (Fighting)

Conkeldurr, a brute with unmatched strength and control over construction materials, represents Ganondorf’s power to physically overwhelm his enemies and reshape the battlefield to his advantage.

Magnezone (Electric/Steel)

Magnezone’s futuristic design and incredible control over magnetism reflect Ganondorf’s ability to manipulate powerful energies and technology in Hyrule Warriors. Its electric attacks match his lightning-like powers and destructive energy.

Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf’s Pokémon Team

Dragapult (Dragon/Ghost)

Dragapult’s ghostly dragon nature represents the duality of Ganondorf’s existence in Tears of the Kingdom, caught between ancient power and the modern world. Its speed and power align with his status as an elite, nearly unstoppable force.

Corviknight (Flying/Steel)

Corviknight, a powerful, armored bird, symbolizes Ganondorf’s regal and imposing presence. Its ability to soar through the skies while wrapped in steel armor fits with his role as a dark conqueror.

Necrozma (Psychic) - Legendary

Necrozma’s ability to absorb light and become something greater aligns with Ganondorf’s thirst for power and transformation. Necrozma’s role as a legendary force of light and darkness parallels Ganondorf’s manipulation of both good and evil forces.

Grimmsnarl (Dark/Fairy)

Grimmsnarl’s sinister, fairy-like nature and its ability to use its hair as a weapon matches Ganondorf’s manipulation of dark magic in Tears of the Kingdom. It’s a reflection of his otherworldly strength and command over darkness.

Garchomp (Dragon/Ground)

Garchomp is a destructive, dragon-like Pokémon that represents Ganondorf’s immense physical strength and his ability to dominate both land and air. Its brutal combat style mirrors Ganondorf’s relentless nature as a warlord.

Demise’s Pokémon Team

Primal Groudon (Ground/Fire) - Legendary

Primal Groudon, a Pokémon associated with land and intense heat, mirrors Demise’s fiery, primal nature. It represents the destruction Demise brings wherever he goes, with the ability to reshape the very earth.

Charizard (Fire/Flying)

Charizard, a dragon-like Pokémon that commands fire and power, reflects Demise’s dominance and his fiery personality. It is feared for its strength and destructive capabilities, much like Demise.

Aggron (Steel/Rock)

Aggron’s imposing presence and powerful defense align with Demise’s overwhelming physical strength. Aggron is a Pokémon that reshapes its environment, just as Demise seeks to reshape the world in his image.

Infernape (Fire/Fighting)

Infernape, a fiery and aggressive fighter, mirrors Demise’s combative and volatile nature. Its speed and raw power reflect his unrelenting desire for conquest and combat prowess.

Heatran (Fire/Steel)

Heatran’s magma-filled body and connection to fire represents the volcanic fury that Demise embodies. Heatran’s power over heat and destruction fits with Demise’s goal to raze everything in his path.

Each of these teams reflects the unique strengths, personalities, and desires of the different versions of Ganondorf and Demise. They would command powerful, intimidating Pokémon that embody their lust for conquest, dominance, and destruction.

[no-other-mashter]

Roving Blade

Pirate Captain!Jake X Siren!Reader

Warnings: Slight violence, minor swearing, the usual piratey nonsense, more tags will be added for later chapters

Captain Jacob Kiszka stood at the helm of his ship, The Mirador, the salty breeze tousling his long brown hair as he gazed out over the vast expanse of the shimmering sea. His amber eyes, usually sharp and focused, softened as he watched the sun dipping below the horizon, casting a golden hue over the restless waves.

The crew of the ship, a formidable bunch that Jake personally hanpicked to travel with him, moved about with purpose. He gave quick glances to the three most important members of his crew.

There was Daniel Wagner, his best friend and honorary brother. Danny moved with practiced ease as he checked the cannons and gear over once more, his dark, curly hair catching the last rays of sunlight like a halo.

Then there was Samuel Kiszka, the youngest of the Kiszka brothers. His long brown hair trailing behind him in the wind and a smile playing on his lips as he effortlessly climbed up the intricate rigging of the ship to check the sails.

Most important to Jake, there was Josh, Jake's twin and his right-hand man. No one besides Sam and Danny knew much about them. One day, two teenagers just appeared with a ship, their kid brother, and another young boy who they dubbed their honorary brother, wreaking havoc on the seas.

Captain Jake was well known for his conquests, his reputation as a fearless and cunning pirate preceeding him. Tales of his daring escapades and his uncanny ability to outwit even the most formidable foes made their way through the taverns of every port town they passed through.

But amidst the whispers of his legendary exploits, there was a softer side to Jake that few were privy to. It was a deep longing within his soul that even the most precious treasures of the world could not quell.

He had everything he could ever want, except the one thing money couldn't buy.

It was that same longing that brought him to stand alone on the deck most nights while his crew slumbered below.

The night enveloped the ship like a velvet cloak, the only illumination coming from the moon's silvery glow dancing on the restless waves. He had a bottle of whiskey in one hand, the other keeping him upright as he leaned against the railing, looking out over the dark waters.

Feeling rather melancholic, he softly sang into the vast expanse of the ocean, letting the melody carry his emotions out into the night air, "I dreamed a dream, the other night... Lowlands, lowlands away me John... My love she came, dressed all in white..."

It wasn't often he sang, even when the crew would break into various shanties during the day. He'd let them have their fun, only joining in for a line or two. But when it was just him, the sea, and a bottle of booze, he let himself relax fully.

"I dreamed my love came in my sleep... Lowlands, lowlands away me John... Her cheeks were wet, her eyes did weep... Lowlands away..."

Far below where Jake stood, something stirred, roused awake by his singing. They swam up from the depths, and a ripple broke the surface of the water as they peeked above with a curious tilt to their head.

Their wide eyes held a mix of wonder and wariness as they regarded the figure of the pirate standing on the deck above. They couldn't help but sing along with Jake, completing the melody.

Their voice was like liquid silver, weaving through the night air with a hypnotic quality. The soft, melodic tones wrapped around Jake like a gentle embrace, harmonizing in a way that felt almost otherworldly.

Jake turned, drawn by a sensation he couldn't quite explain, to see the source of the enchanting hum. He felt almost sleepy as he took a step forward, then another, before climbing up on the railing, desperate to get to the source of the voice.

"Jake!"

Before Jake could tumble over the ledge, he was yanked back on deck by his twin, Josh. The sudden jolt of being pulled back from the edge of the ship brought Jake back to his senses, his heart pounding in his chest as he stumbled backward.

Josh's grip on Jake's arm was firm, his expression a mixture of concern and exasperation. "What the hell are you doing, Jake? Are you trying to take a dive into the ocean in the dead of night?"

Shaken from the trance-like state that the mesmerizing voice had cast upon him, Jake blinked rapidly, his mind struggling to catch up with the abrupt return to reality, "I... I heard something, Josh. A voice, singing. It was... enchanting," he stammered.

Josh arched an eyebrow, casting a wary glance over the empty, dark waters that surrounded the ship. "Enchanting, you say? Are you sure that bottle of whiskey hasn't played tricks on your ears, brother?" His tone was laced with slight amusement, though beneath it lay heavy concern for his twin's well-being.

"I'm telling you, Josh, I know I heard something," Jake repeated. His amber eyes searched the darkness beyond the ship, as if hoping to catch a glimpse of the source of the ethereal voice that had captivated him moments ago.

Josh knew Jake to be a man with an open mind, but the notion of a mystical encounter with a creature of legend seemed too fantastical even for Jake's vivid imagination. Yet, the intensity in Jake's gaze concerned Josh.

"Jake, you've been drinking too long. Your mind is playing tricks on you," Josh remarked, "We should get you to bed."

Jake didn't oppose him this time, choosing to let Josh lead him back to his quarters. Despite Josh's attempts to reassure him that it was just the alcohol playing tricks on his senses, Jake couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more to that voice that had reached out to him in the night.

He knew something was out there, and he knew he would find it.

--

The first rays of the morning sun filtered through the small porthole in Jake's cabin, casting a warm golden glow over the rumpled sheets of his bed. As he slowly stirred from his slumber, a dull ache reverberated through his skull. With a groan, he raised a hand to his temple, trying to ease the throbbing sensation.

Blinking his eyes open, Jake's gaze fell upon the scene before him. He was still mostly dressed, the fabric rumpled from a restless night's sleep. A heavy sense of unease settled in his chest as he took in the sight of the empty whiskey bottle lying on its side, its contents drained to the last drop.

With a determined shake of his head, Jake pushed himself up from the bed, his bare feet meeting the cool wooden floorboards of his cabin. He pulled his boots back on, lazily fixing his clothes and running his fingers through his hair to untangle any knots.

As he made his way above deck, the salty tang of the sea air greeted him, mingling with the crisp morning breeze that tousled his long brown locks. His crew was already up and about, milling about purposefully as they prepared to get moving once more.

"Captain! How are you this morning?" Josh jogged up to Jake, lowering his voice once he was close enough, "You all good after last night, Jake? Ya had me a bit worried with all your talk of "enchanting voices" calling you out to sea."

"Don't worry, Josh, I'm fine," Jake replied, giving him a reassuring grin.

Josh nodded, though unconvinced. Still, he didn't press the issue further; once they were out of these waters, they'd be far enough away from whatever had caused Jake to nearly go overboard.

The sun climbed higher in the sky, casting a brilliant shine over the endless expanse of the sea. The ship cut through the waves with a rhythmic cadence, the creaking of the timbers, and the flapping of sails providing a backdrop to the bustling activity of the crew.

As the day wore on, Jake found himself drawn back to the railing, the memory of the voice from the night before lingering in his mind like a half-remembered dream. He scanned the horizon, his gaze searching for any sign of the mysterious singer who had captivated him.

But the vast ocean offered no clues, no hints as to the identity of the voice that had reached out to him in the darkness. Disheartened yet determined, Jake turned his attention to his duties as a captain, barking orders and overseeing the crew as they worked tirelessly to navigate the ship through the unpredictable waters.

It took them only a day to land in the next port town. It was little more than a speck on the map, and the locals were (rightfully) unsure how much they liked the presence of Jake and his crew. But once Jake provided them with a hefty pouch of coins in return for their stay, they seemed to relax around the visitors.

While the rest of his crew made the most of their short time on land, Jake stayed by the beach, lost in thought. He didn't hear someone approach from behind him until a hand landed upon his shoulder.

Startled at the unexpected touch, Jake jumped, whipping around with his hand on the hilt of his sword. He relaxed once he realized it was only Danny.

"Sorry, Jake, didn't mean to scare 'ya there," Danny chuckled, raising his hands in surrender, "I just came to see if you were alright. Josh was tellin' us that you had quite the experience last night."

"I already told him I was fine. Nothin' I can't handle," Jake scoffed, "I just drank a bit too much is all."

The sun hung low on the horizon now, casting a warm golden hue over the sandy shores. Seagulls wheeled overhead, their raucous cries mingling with the distant sounds of the bustling port town.

"I know you, Jake. You don't really think that," Danny's voice cut through the other sounds, matter-of-factly challenging Jake's earlier dismissal.

Jake's amber brown eyes flickered with frustration as he turned to face Danny, a hint of vulnerability creeping into his expression, "No, I don't. I know I heard something out there, and as much as I want to believe it was anything else, a part of me knows what it was."

In all honesty, Jake knew what it was from the moment he was pulled back from nearly jumping overboard.

Sirens, mermaids, water nymphs – the names swirled like a tempest in his thoughts, each one carrying with it a weight of ancient legends and cautionary tales.

He knew the stories, the warnings whispered by seasoned sailors and woven into the very fabric of maritime lore. The enchanting melodies that lured unsuspecting souls to their watery graves, the haunting beauty that masked a deadly intent. The descriptions varied, but the outcome was always the same – a fate sealed by the irresistible call of the sea.

Danny's voice carried a note of urgency, a sailor's instinct honed by years spent navigating treacherous waters, "If we're on the same page, then I reckon we should probably leave these waters sooner rather than later. The longer we stay, the more likely we'll lose someone-"

Jake, his jaw set in a firm line, cut him off before he could finish, "No. I'm not running away with my tail between my legs like a scared mutt."

"But Jake-"

"If you all want to stay ashore, then go ahead. I'll go on my own if I have to."

Realizing he was getting nowhere with this, Danny sighed and stood up, "I'm with you if this is something you need to do, Jake. I trust you." And with that, he turned and headed back up towards the town, presumably to tell the others what Jake had decided.

Call it bravery, call it greed, Jake didn't care. If it really was a creature of myth that tried to call him to the sea, he had to see it for himself.

Upon returning to his crew, Jake said only one thing.

"Lads, it's time to go fishing."

-----

Jake knew it wouldn't be easy to catch a Siren; as far as he knew, it's never been done. The moon hung low in the sky, its silvery light dancing on the gentle waves that lapped against the sides of the ship.

The air was heavy with anticipation, a palpable energy that crackled in the salty breeze. Jake stood at the helm, his eyes fixed ahead and his heart pounding with excitement. The familiar weight of his sword at his side was a gounding presence, a reminder of the danger he was putting himself and the rest of his crew in.

The crew worked swiftly and silently, their movements guided by the rhythm of the ocean. The sails billowed overhead, and lanterns cast a warm glow on the deck, creating long shadows that danced with the gentle sway of the ship.

As they sailed further into the darkness, the stars above seemed to multiply, sprinkling the sky like scattered diamonds. The night was alive with the symphony of the sea – the creaking of the ship, the soft lapping of the waves, the distant cries of seabirds.

He had told them all his plan to catch this mystical creature earlier in the day.

First, they would head out to the approximate location they had been at the first time Jake heard the singing. Once there, the rest of the crew would turn out the lights and stay silent while Jake lured it out. And finally, if that worked, they had just the thing to capture it.

Months before, Danny and Sam had come to Jake with an idea of theirs - a smaller sized cannon that could launch a net much farther than the crew could throw it. At first, Jake had dismissed the idea as nothing more than a fanciful whim, a contraption that seemed more suited for a circus act than a pirate ship.

But now, he found himself reconsidering their proposal. After employing the help of a blacksmith in town and testing it out many times, their net contraption was ready for use.

When they dropped anchor, the ship rocking gently against the current was the only sound breaking the silence of the night. Jake stood at the edge of the deck, rough rope tied securely around his waist, a lifeline in case the plan went awry. Josh had insisted upon everyone being tethered down, unwilling to go through with the plan without it.

The rest of the crew got into position, staying silent and hidden so as not to alert their target of any danger. Sam and Danny waited for the perfect moment to launch the net, while Josh kneeled beside the rope keeping his twin tethered to the ship, just in case anything went wrong.

With everything ready and in place, Jake began to hum a tune, hoping it would draw the siren, or whatever it was, to him once more.

An hour passed with no sign of any response, and Jake began to grow doubtful of his plan working. The night seemed to stretch on endlessly, the only sounds the gentle lapping of the waves against the hull, the creaking of the ship as it swayed with the current, and the occasional distant cry of a seabird

The moon hung like a silver coin in the sky, casting a ghostly light over the dark waters. Jake stood at the edge of the ship, his heart heavy with uncertainty. His amber brown eyes scanned the horizon, searching for any sign of movement, any glimmer in the darkness that would signify the presence of the elusive creature he sought.

The crew, hidden in the shadows, watched with bated breath, their anticipation palpable in the still night air. Danny's brow furrowed, his trust in the plan wavering as the minutes passed. Sam shifted from one foot to the other, anxiously tapping his fingers against his thigh as he waited. Josh remained close to the tether, his hands gripping the rope tightly as he kept a vigilant watch over his twin brother.

As the minutes ticked by, doubts crept into Jake's mind. What if there was nothing here? What if this was all a wild goose chase, brought on by wild maritime tales? Had he really been so foolish?

Just as he was about to call it all off, a soft melody began to weave through the stillness of the night.

"My heart is pierced by cupid, I disdain all glittering gold... There is nothing can console me but my jolly sailor bold..."

A dim light could be seen just a few meters from the side of the ship, ripples disturbing the water as something poked its head above the waves. And this time, Jake kept his eyes on it.

Even in the dim moonlight, he could see the way the its skin seemed to have an unearthy shimmer to it, like the surface of a pearl. Wide, large eyes stared back at him, and he yearned to get just a little closer to them.

"His hair it hangs in dark waves, his eyes like amber coals... my happiness is with him, wherever he may go..."

Just as Jake leaned closer, half his body over the railing, Josh held the rope tight and shouted, "Now!"

The command pierced through the night like a cannon blast, igniting a flurry of movement on the deck. Sam and Danny sprang into action, their trained muscles working in perfect synchrony as they released the tension on the contraption. The makeshift cannon roared to life, propelling the net with incredible force towards the shimmering figure in the water.

There was no time for them to dive back below the waves. The net soared through the air, a tangled mass of ropes and weights hurtling towards the mysterious creature that had entranced Jake with its haunting melody. The impact was like a thunderclap in the silent night, the net enveloping the creature in a cacophony of splashes and thrashes. The water frothed and churned as the siren fought against its restraints, desperate cries echoing across the dark expanse of the sea.

Jake, his heart pounding in his chest, felt a surge of adrenaline as he regained his awareness. His eyes blazed with determination as he took control of the situation, his voice cutting through the chaos with authority, "Pull, boys! Bring it up on deck!"

It was clear that after only a few minutes, their target was tired out, the thrashing and fighting much weaker than before. With one last pull, they were dragged from the water and up to the deck of the ship.

They were more beautiful than Jake ever expected. Those wide eyes seemed to look through Jake, as if seeing something in him that he could not. The iridescent sheen of their skin was mesmerizing, akin to the lustrous glow of a priceless pearl. The scales adorning their tail shimmered in the moonlight, each scale glinting like a precious stone.

Jake kneeled down, tilting his head to the side as he stared deep into the eyes of something he'd never seen before. It blinked once, and then...

You blinked again, staring into the deep amber eyes of Captain Jacob Kiszka.

[theskeletonprior]

Write Time: Day One

At it again! This month, my goal is a cool 30 000 words written. I'll be carrying on with more RAVENOT. If you’re curious, you can take a look at my WIP intro right here. And if you’re really keen, you can read the first chapter (sort of a pilot as I toil) right here! Now onto the daily ramble.

Total Count: 1308 as of this posting. Another successful Day One on the books (haha). From this point, it's just buffer, so I'll be pecking on that for the rest of the evening, but I'm still planning to take it easy. I've cleared my schedule for the month, so there should be significantly fewer distractions throughout the week. My work schedule is also incredibly forgiving, so the cards are stacked for my success. The next three days are busy, but I'll squeak in a little bit of time, hopefully. I'm already thinking about doing future Write Times, which I think bodes well. It's time to go all in on this novelist thing. Wish me luck, friends! And please behold, today's excerpt.

Alone, Ravenot set his thurible down on the floor, where the smoke snaked out about his feet as if it, too, were searching somehow. They let it; the soothing qualities of its burning would be needed here, if the child was indeed no changeling. The suspicion alone could be fatal, and though it was not for Ravenot to meddle in, there was no need to leave any room for it. They approached the cradle, shucking one of their gauntlets and the leather glove under it, exposing their blackened bones to the air. That was the truth of their body, what the mask and gloves concealed. The unsightly visage of one long dead, and yet undying, and though the times had passed when he might truly inspire dread with his appearance, there were still those amongst the living who would be frightened by the sight of him. He reached with jet-black fingerbones, gently peeling back the bloodstained swaddle, and in that very moment, the Risen's impulse became clear, for what had at first glance resembled blood he knew to be crimson sap, viscous, and already beginning to harden. The changeling had been born dead. Born dead to a dead parent, and left amongst the living. There was nothing to it now, nothing that might arise and wreak havoc of its own. Ravenot withdrew his hand, shaking off the sap which clung to it before putting his glove and gauntlet on again. Then, retrieving their thurible, they joined Yarrowling in the hallway. "So?" Her posture grew taut, as if Ravenot might ask that she hand over the infant to him. "'Tis no changeling. That body, there, is the stillborn get of one of the Risen," he said. "Now 'tis daylight, it must be taken beyond the walls and buried. Buried, mark me, not burned. And be sure not to touch it with thy bare skin. Wear gloves, and bury them with the body. Canst do this?"

Taglist: @alexanderflowerbird @void-botanist @carmillasboywife @ceph-the-ghost-writer @wintherlywords

As always, let me know if you’d like to join or leave the taglist, and I’ll act accordingly.

[animebw]

Short Reflection: Link Click Season 2

It's a bit strange, I know, to write a full review for a show's second season without having done the same for its first. Though I suppose I did the same with Jujutsu Kaisen as well, so maybe this just helps me process my thoughts better. Sometimes it takes until I've really spent a lot of time with a show to fully unpack how I feel about it. And while I enjoyed Link Click's first season a lot, it left a lot of questions in the air that left my feelings fairly inconclusive. Not just plot questions, but questions of theme, message, meaning, what it was trying to say with all its time-twisting stories. The ride itself was fun, but this felt like a case where I really needed to see the destination as well. Only then would I really be able to nail down my thoughts on Link Click as a whole.

Well, now I've reached that destination. Mostly; there's a third season on the way eventually, but enough of those big questions are answered by the end of season 2 that I'm able to sort out my thoughts a little better. And man, what a fascinating, frustrating, singular experience this turned out to be.

In case you need a recap, Link Click is the story of Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang, two young men with the power to travel into the past through photographs and help resolve their clients' lingering regrets. Maybe they need to find some long-forgotten secret, or pass on a final message the client never got the chance to. But whatever the case, the most important rule remains the same: do not change the past. No matter how tragic or unfair a person's life as been, meddling with the timeline to try and make things better will only result in further tragedy. At least that's how it seems until the end of season 1, when it's revealed that someone- or perhaps, a larger group- has been wreaking havoc with their own photo-based superpowers to ensure these tragic fates are brought to their inevitable conclusion. Thus, season 2 is all about tracking down the people responsible, unraveling one big conspiracy to stop the criminals before they cause any more damage.

So already that's a pretty big change from season 1. Instead of spending time with a bunch of episodic small-scale mysteries that freely bounce between various tones, Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang are now focused on this singular case in a season-long ongoing supernatural crime drama. Thankfully, there's enough excuses to jump into the past that we still get a decent chunk of that genre-mixing experience that I loved about season 1. We may not have as much variety as before- there's no love stories or sports anime subplots here- but the mechanics of time-leaping are still pretty essential to how the story unfolds and how the characters come to understand their place in it. What is missing, though- arguably one of season 1's most important qualities that pretty much vanishes in season 2- is the exploration of the morality of messing with time itself.

See, one of the first season's thorniest conflicts was whether or not is was right, or safe, for Cheng Xiaoshi to change the pasts of the people he jumped back into. So many of his and Lu Guang's clients had truly miserable lives, and there were many times he felt like he had a chance- no, a responsibility- to take action in their past that would send their present down a better path. But it was never as easy as that, and often times, his attempts to make things better would just end up making them worse. And I'm really unsure how to feel about Link Click's handling of this concept. Sure, I know the reason they can't just use time travel to fix everything: once you give your characters the power to rewrite any mistake, the stakes pretty much become nonexistent. For the sake of a good story, Cheng kind of has to be doomed to not be able to make a difference in the past. But there's a point at which the world starts to feel actively unfair with how it twists every single attempt he makes to force a tragic result regardless. Is changing the past bad because you can't predict how it will shape the future, or has the universe just cosmically ordained that certain people will suffer and die no matter what? Because only one of those answers is compelling to me, and I'm not convinced it's the answer Link Click has decided to go with.

And that was one of the answers I was most hoping to get in season 2. What, exactly, does this story have to say about messing with time? Is it actually engaging with that question honestly, or is it simply forcing the answer it prefers with cheap moralizing and forced plot turns? Unfortunately, that question remains basically unaddressed throughout season 2. In fact, most of those broader questions and philosophy and character journeys from season 1 take a backseat to the mechanics of the plot in season 2. Season 1's greatest strength was how well it balanced its sci-fi and thriller elements with the humanity at the core of its cast, using its time-leaping to explore not just Cheng's character but the countless ways people choose to move on from the past or remain stuck in it, or draw power from it. With season 2's narrowed focus, though, it really only does that for its central antagonists, and basically every other character is pure plot machinery. Compared to how lush and lived-in the countless snapshots of memory we visited in season 1 felt, the world of season 2 barely feels like it exists outside the confines of the plot.

My guess is, the intention here was to choose quality over quantity. Instead of getting lots of brief insights into the lives of various different people, we spend the whole season digging into just the central antagonists' past and fleshing it out in as much detail as possible. And to its credit, this seasons' villains, a pair of psychic siblings who parallel Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang's brotherly relationship. Their past is easily Link Click's darkest tale yet, a story of abuse, neglect, trauma and social toxicity that at times feels like a darkest-possible-timeline mirror to that question of using your powers to fix a bad situation only to make it a million times worse. And it's not subtle about connecting that darkness with the worst of China's familial culture, which I do not know enough about to discuss with any authority, but let's just say that basically any man in this season who tries to exercise his authority over a woman ends up paying the price for it. More than anything, it reminds me of the way Gen Urobuchi tackles misogyny in his work, exploring how attitudes of patriarchal domination twist people into monsters while everyone in close proximity suffers for it- even when you think you're doing it with noble intentions.

Sadly, as compelling as that central hook is, the rest of the season really suffers around it. The problem with Link Click introducing new superpowered characters is it kind of forces itself to get trapped in the mechanics of it all. Season 1 got away with using time jumps mostly just as the backbone for its various character studies, but now the show has to actually deal with how all these various powers work and interact, and considering how many of these powers involve messing with time, it doesn't take long for this shit to get real convoluted real fast. It's a headache trying to keep track of the rules behind the antagonists' powers, and it feels like no matter what the answer is, there's at least one scenario in the show that completely breaks those rules. And don't get me started on how many head-smacking contrivances this season pulls to force its plot into the shape it wants. You're telling me you've got this person imprisoned who you know has some unknown power you're unprepared to deal with, and you let her just waltz out of security camera sight without a ten-man gun squad keeping an eye on her at all times? Are you high???

Overall, Link Click season 2 is just messy. It's a big swing that takes big chances with the foundation season 1 established, but it doesn't hit every pitch and you really feel the disjoint where it strikes out. It's a good thing the art and animation are still as superb as they were in season 1; turns out, an expertly-choreographed hand-to-hand fight scene can help even the dumbest plot points go down easier. But the series overall feels on much shakier ground than it did at the end of season 1, and I hope season 3 will be able to right that ship. I'd hate for a series this promising to become just another disappointing failure to establish Chinese donghua as a true artistic powerhouse. Until then, though, season 2 gets a score of:

6/10

And on that note, I think I have another poll to make. See you in a few hours...

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Sideshow Bob

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

For over thirty years now The Simpsons has provided the world with all manner of wacky shenanigans.  And when it comes to cartoons, what better way to cause shenanigans than by having a villain show up to wreak havoc? Most often the villain is the decrepit billionaire Mr. Burns, but sometimes you get a hilarious and memorable one-shot character like the affably evil Hank Scorpio. But in the middle, between being a major member of the cast and being a guest character, there is one man: Sideshow Bob.

The man with the palm tree hair and multiple attempted murders under his belt has cemented himself as one of the most iconic antagonists in television history as he seeks vengeance against Bart Simpson for thwarting his original scheme to get Krusty the clown arrested. With a little over a dozen major appearances across the history of the series and zero successes to his name, he is very much the Wile E. Coyote to Bart’s Roadrunner, and it’s typically as funny as that sounds.

But as we all know, many characters on the show have suffered the curse of flanderization, where key parts of their initial personality are magnified until that’s all they’re about, so named because fellow character Ned Flanders had his religious beliefs cranked up to 11 as time went on. The same could be said about Bob, with his desire to kill Bart overriding any sort of closure he receives at the end of every episode… But does this diminish his quality as a villain?

Motivation/Goals: Fitting for an animated sitcom, Bob’s motivations aren’t the most complex in the world. In his first appearance, he merely wanted to frame Krusty to take over his show and turn it into something more high brow, but after Bart helped thwart his schemes his new goal became to murder Bart, and that’s mainly what he’s stuck with. “Sideshow Bob’s Last Gleaming” and “The Day of the Jackanapes” mix things up a bit by having him target Krusty as well, but Bart dying is something that would have inevitably come to fruition if he’d succeeded.

Frankly, this just makes Bob even funnier as a character. This dude has beef with literal fucking children and despite being a genius he literally never wins. He truly is the perfect second banana to a clown, always suffering for the gag while never getting the limelight he feels he deserves.

Performance: Perhaps the single thing that makes Bob stand out is that he has always, in every appearance, been voiced by none other than Kelsey Grammer, AKA Frasier Crane from Cheers and Frasier (Or Beast from X-Men: The Last Stand). I think it’s pretty obvious he kills it as Bob, bringing just the right air of menace and class to have Bob be seen as a legitimate threat while also being able to deliver some great jokes. Also, he gets to sing quite a bit, which is always a treat.

Final Fate: Every single time he appears, Bob is inevitably thwarted and sent to jail, usually worse off than when he started the episode. There are a few unique examples where Bob gets it a bit  worse than usual; “Brother From Another Series” has Bob save the day but then get arrested anyway because Wiggum is a fucking idiot, while “Funeral for a Fiend” features him going completely insane.

Best Episode: It does not matter how much time has passed, “Cape Feare�� will always remain the #1 greatest appearance of Sideshow Bob. It has it all: Movie references, musical numbers, murderous plots, and classic gags! And speaking of gags, the episode contains one of the single funniest gags Bob has ever been a part of.

Coming in at a close second would be “Sideshow Bob Roberts,” where Bob rigs an election. The entire episode really shows just how little conservatives have changed over nearly 30 years; the episode aired on October 9, 1994, and its jabs at the right wing are as timeless as ever. It also helps that the episode is a riot, with tons of good gags. “Krusty Gets Busted,” “Black Widower,” “Brother from Another Series,” “The Day of the Jackanapes,” “The Great Louse Detective,” and “The Bob Next Door”  are all solid entries as well, and feature Bob at his most cunning, though they’re always gonna be in the shadow of “Cape Feare” (and “Sideshow Bob Roberts” to a lesser extent).

Best Quote: It’s gotta be this one, if only for the sheer absurdity of how posh Bob makes catcalling sound:

Final Thoughts & Score: Previously I compared Bob to fellow animated antagonist Denzel Crocker, in the sense they both became increasingly flanderized and their roles began to make less and less sense as time went on with the show, with Bob’s murderous impulses never going away even when there’s plenty of reason that they should. Both “Brother From Another Series” and “Day of the Jackanapes” give pretty nice end points for Bob’s arc; the former, if they had cut out the mean-spirited ending, would have had Bob redeemed and finally given him a bit of peace, and the latter has him actually reconciling with Krusty (and getting the death penalty). But they continued to bring him back, with “The Great Louse Detective” also giving a great end point for Bob, complete with a musical number! But then he’s back for “The Italian Bob,” the worst of his appearances, which then ties into his next appearance in “Funeral for a Fiend,” which also gives us a nice stopping point. But no, he keeps coming back with the same goals each and every time: Kill Bart (or sometimes Krusty).

But the thing with Bob compared to Crocker is that while the latter shows up a lot in his series to the point he’s a main antagonist, Bob is used extremely sparingly. He has 15 major appearances over the course of The Simpsons run, with one of those being a “Treehouse of Horror” segment and some of those appearances happening several seasons apart. The lack of oversaturation helps make the flanderization sting a bit less; sure, he’s always sliding back into the same old evil routines, but he doesn’t show up enough where it becomes completely stale. Some of his later appearances end up being a bit less impressive than earlier ones, but he’s still enjoyable enough that none of his episodes are downright awful.

A lot of this is thanks to Kelsey Grammer’s voice work. He’s really a perfect fit for this egotistical, classy attempted murderer, and considering Grammer’s a decently big name thanks to Cheers and Frasier, it’s probably not without reason they use him sparingly. Still, I think what ultimately keeps Bob great compared to a lot of other cartoon villains is that he’s just such a ridiculous concept that it’s hard for him to not end up being fun whenever he appears. This is a former sidekick to a TV clown who wants to murder a small child, he has a long-standing rivalry with rakes, and he enjoys singing opera. He has stolen a nuke, stolen someone’s face, rigged an election, and attempted to assassinate a clown by hypnotizing a child and rigging him with explosives. His schemes are wacky, convoluted, and cartoonish, but Grammer’s performance will convince you that these actions are the most brilliant a criminal could conceive of.

Has Bob lost a little bit of luster over the years? Sure. But much like the show he’s part of, writing him off completely because of a few weaker showings is a bit disingenuous. Bob’s a high 9.5/10, leaning a bit more towards the 10, and maybe they’d get there if they could commit to giving him a proper ending. But hey, even if they never do, I’m not gonna complain when I hear Grammer drop a “Hello, Bart” for the fiftieth time right before Bob steps on a rake.

[adndmonsteraday]

A seawolf was a very rare lycanthrope that could transform between a seal-wolf creature, a humanoid, or a hybrid bearing qualities of both forms.

Seawolves could either be lesser or greater. Greater seawolves were generally more powerful: they were bigger, stronger, and better swimmers. Lesser seawolves were only faster on land. Otherwise, they were identical.

All seawolves could assume three forms: human form, wolf-human hybrid, or seal-wolf hybrid. At sea, it was fastest at swimming in its seal-wolf form, followed by its human form, then the wolf-human hybrid form. Each form was thickly muscled, but the seal-like form had a thin mane.

Seawolves were savage predators, and lived for the chance at murdering, which they preferred to do in animal form. Otherwise, they were found in human form, often pretending to be sailors or similar professions and committing crimes. They indulged in causing chaos, burglary, and attacking at every opportunity.

As with other werecreatures, a seawolf's lycanthropy was transferred via biting. If the transmission was successful, the infected being would transform into a seawolf on the turn of the next full moon, or within two to five days. The infected creature would feel tainted by evil, much like a twisted version of their former self.

Female seawolves were rarer and, when impregnated, they would give birth to seawolf cubs, which would appear human in the day, and like a seal at night. However, they were always swiftly deserted by their evil parents, with only a one-in-twenty chance of the abandoned seawolves reaching adulthood.

The seawolf diet consisted of sea mammals, fish, and even humans. When in the mood, seawolves would turn into their human forms to visit the local tavern. Here, their activities consisted of much drinking and wenching.

In seal-wolf form, seawolves would attack with deadly bites, which they could also do (but to lesser effect) in hybrid form. Seawolves were dexterous by nature, as well as cunning. They preferred to fight in their primal seal-wolf forms.

Unlike other lycanthropes, when seawolves were slain, they did not revert back to their natural form.

Such creatures could hold their breath for a long time underwater, but needed to come up for air, much like dolphins.

Seawolves formed medium-sized packs, or otherwise traveled on their own or in pairs. Seawolf societies often hunted vessels, which they would board during night time. Once on board, the aquatic lycanthropes would steal treasure, murder the sailors, or both. Otherwise, a few select seawolf spies would integrate themselves into a naval society in their human forms. After this, they would wreak havoc aboard, leading the ships into an ambush of waiting seawolves.

Some seawolf societies kept hidden lairs in coastal environments that were easily accessible from the sea.

Seawolves could choose other evil lycanthropes as their allies, such as weresharks, and they hated selkies.

In the Sea of Fallen Stars, they were known to be prevalent around the northern part of Serôs. They were also known to occasionally be found in the Great Ice Sea that surrounded the arctic plains of the Hordelands.

At least one pack of seawolves were known to live in the waters around the Red Rocks off the Sword Coast North.

Source: https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Seawolf

[kitschycartoons]

Fluppy Dogs (1986)

Warnings: None! this movie is ridiculously inoffensive Why did you choose this? Magic pubbies... cute What is this thing? Fluppy Dogs is a childrens book turned 45 minute pilot by Disney. This aired on Thanksgiving of 1986 so, tis the season. Unfortunately, the ratings for the special were very low, and Disney decided not to pick this up for a full series.

The good! Multicolored puppydogs with magical powers? sign me up. This movie was before my time, but kid me would've gone completely wild. Look at them, they're so cute, even though their design is a bit samey across the cast. They could've changed the dog breeds up a little, but oh well. A friend of mine noted that they look way better than Pound Puppies, and he's right. This would've been preferable.

[apologies for this deep fried quality, but you get the idea] Also, I like the name. Fluffy + Puppy = Fluppy, it's goofy 10/10 The special was animated by TMS, so the animation is top tier, no notes. The soundtrack is nicely done by a symphonic band(?) It follows a lot of familiar musical tropes for a children's show in the 80's, but it was kind of nice to hear again, even if it gets a bit repetitive. The bad! You can tell Disney was aiming at a Care Bears ripoff and this is exactly it. There's nothing that makes the Fluppy's stand out. They make you fly if you pet them, and they go on magical adventures through inter-dimensional doors. Care Bears worked because they were more cohesive in their mission and powers. They fly on in and help kids with their problems. Fluppy's? they show up in our world and wreak havoc because they got lost going on a magical door adventure. There were points where this almost felt like a parody show from Saturday Morning All Star Hits, the way the Fluppy's made Jamie (our self insert kid protagonist) play hookey from school and messed up his house. They put it back together, but still. When Jamie tries to put his foot down, Stanley (our Fluppy protagonist) tries bribing him with "Well don't you like going on adventures, Jamie?" It really felt like Charlie the Unicorn. Unlike a lot of cartoon reviewers, I give one dimensional villains slack. They can have a purpose and be fun if done right. But this antagonist was a snoozeball. An evil rich animal collector trying to capture the fluppies. Tell me you haven't heard this one before. He had one relatable scene though:

Pictured: Me when puppy. Also, look at this thang:

Its smug aura mocks me. I do not like this. I signed up for puppies. Get it out of here. This may be my 90's kid-now-old experience talking, but I could never stand a character who's purpose is to do nothing but be disruptive. You don't see these characters anymore, and my working theory is that people my age are making cartoons now, and they couldn't stand them either. Rating: 5/10

It's a perfectly average 80's kids special, and perfectly harmless. It's made by disney, so zero risks were involved here. But the cartoon quality is high. You can (coughs) find a full version on youtube. I doubt it's being put up on Disney+ any time soon. But the 2017 Ducktales gave them a little shout-out, and I think that's very sweet.

[mariacallous]

Lutyens’ Delhi is one of the most iconic neighborhoods of India’s capital. Home to the country’s parliament, numerous embassies, and a lush, 90-acre Mughal-era park, it’s an architectural paradise, connected by tree-lined streets and roundabouts with mini-gardens. Yet despite being one of the city’s most refined districts, this clean, green neighborhood is home to something sinister. It is a hot spot for a dangerous and overlooked air pollutant: ozone.

India is no stranger to pollution, with many of its cities reporting some of the worst air quality in the world. Every winter, New Delhi gets shrouded in smog for days. But discussions about air pollution and policies to mitigate it mostly focus on particulate matter: PM2.5 and PM10—small particles or droplets that are only a few microns in diameter. However, scientists are increasingly raising the alarm about surface ozone. It’s a secondary pollutant that isn’t released from any source, forming naturally when oxides of nitrogen and volatile organic compounds—such as benzene, which is found in gasoline, or methane—react under high heat and sunlight. This makes ozone a particularly ugly modern threat—a problem that arises where pollution and climate change coincide.

“Even an hour of exposure can give you very poor health outcomes,” says Avikal Somvanshi, a researcher at the Center for Science and Environment in New Delhi. While ozone is beneficial in the high atmosphere, where it absorbs ultraviolet radiation, down on Earth’s surface, concentrations of it can be deadly. Data on its impacts is patchy, but a 2022 study estimates that ozone killed more than 400,000 people worldwide in 2019, up 46 percent since 2000. And according to the State of Global Air Report 2020, it is in India where the number of ozone deaths has increased the most over the past decade.

Ozone wreaks havoc in the respiratory tract. The gas can “inflame and damage airways” and “aggravate lung diseases like asthma,” warns the US Environmental Protection Agency. It does this by affecting the cilia, the microscopic hair-like structures that line the airways to help protect them, explains Karthik Balajee, a clinician and community medicine specialist based in Karaikal, India. After exposure “we are more prone to respiratory infections,” he says, adding that inhaling ozone also affects lung capacity. Studies show that long-term exposure is associated with an increased risk of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, a lung disease that makes it hard to breathe, and increases the risk of dying from other cardiovascular or respiratory conditions. Even short-term exposure can land you in the emergency room. “One or two days following a peak in ozone, there have been increases in hospital admissions due to respiratory problems,” says Balajee.

Delhi and other major Indian cities see spikes in ozone throughout the year, but particularly during summer heat waves, which have become increasingly common due to climate change. The World Health Organization says that exposure to ozone in the air, across an eight-hour period, shouldn’t exceed 50 parts per billion; India’s air quality standard says this WHO limit shouldn’t be broken on more than eight days a year, and not on two consecutive days. But analysis by Somvanshi and his colleagues has found that ozone has already exceeded limits in Delhi and its surrounding areas on 87 days between March and May this year. And they’ve seen similar results over the past three summers. And while the number of monitoring stations recording a breach of the ozone threshold was fewer this year than in previous years, the duration of the exceedance was higher. “We are not even close to compliance with the standard,” says Somvanshi.

Part of what’s driving this problem is ozone’s complicated relationship with other air pollutants. Ozone formation is a cyclic reaction, meaning that after it’s generated by reactions between air pollutants, ozone gets converted back to oxygen when it reacts again with pollutants in the air, such as oxides of nitrogen. But if those pollutants are not present after ozone has formed, it lingers. That’s why ozone levels shot up during India’s Covid-19 lockdown in the summer of 2020, when traffic screeched to a halt—the air pollutants needed to convert it back to oxygen weren’t being produced. It’s also why ozone is often found in green neighborhoods like Lutyens’ Delhi—because their air is cleaner, reactions that get rid of the ozone don’t take place.

Controlling particulate pollution is relatively simple—you just regulate its sources, such as vehicles and crop burning. Reducing ozone levels is harder. “Our prediction of how ozone might respond to pollutant changes or emission changes is complicated by environmental factors,” says Steve Arnold, professor of atmospheric composition at the University of Leeds. When trying to drive levels down, everything depends on the exact mixture of the different precursor pollutants in the air, he says.

Reducing precursor gasses is one way to reduce ozone formation. But bring them down too much and you won’t have any left to neutralize the ozone that’s already present. This is exactly what has happened in China, says Arnold, where stringent policies have reduced PM2.5 pollution in recent decades but the ozone problem has worsened. “There’s a delicate balance that needs to be made,” says Somvanshi.

At present, particulate matter is India’s focus, and rightly so—it’s a bigger problem. According to Arnold’s research, 900,000 deaths in India each year are linked to PM2.5, with 374,000 linked to ozone. But in the future, we should worry more about ozone, Arnold says. He has modeled how ozone pollution in India might look in the coming years. “If you go to 2050, then the health impacts from particulate matter and the health impacts from ozone pollution become much more similar in magnitude,” he says. One reason is that researchers believe pollution control policies in the future will be more successful in mitigating particulate matter than ozone.

Arnold’s study estimated that by 2050, India could see more than a million premature deaths a year linked to ozone exposure if there is no change in emissions. Even under a strict pollution control policy, premature deaths due to ozone were estimated to be 791,000—more than twice as many as in 2015.

While the gas is a problem in other countries, it is India’s poor air quality and increasingly common heat waves that makes ozone a particularly grave threat there. And for Arnold, how the country will evolve is concerning: India will have both a growing and aging population in the coming decades—meaning more people will be exposed to ozone, and in particular, more who are vulnerable.

And it’s not just human health that is damaged. Ozone also threatens food security by causing plant yields to “reduce drastically,” says Madhoolika Agrawal, a professor in the department of botany at Banaras Hindu University. Ozone enters plants through small pores on their leaves, explains Agrawal, and then kills cells by oxidizing them. Leaves then start yellowing and the plant is unable to photosynthesize. India’s wheat crop is particularly vulnerable. The country is a major producer and aspires to be a top exporter—yet studies show it loses millions of tons of wheat and rice annually to ozone. In fact, a 2021 paper shows that ozone affects the yield and seed quality of all major crops in India. Current policies are “insufficient in reducing crop loss to ozone,” its authors write.

At present, Somvanshi says India is “not doing anything” about ozone, and that the way the country’s Central Pollution Control Board monitors the toxic gas is flawed. The CPCB caps ozone pollution measurement at 200 micrograms per cubic meter—above that, the measurement software just records a blank cell in the data sheet. “We don’t really know exactly how severe the problem gets,” says Somvanshi, comparing the situation to checking someone’s fever using a thermometer that can only go up to 100 degrees Fahrenheit. The CPCB also reports ozone levels after averaging values at all the monitoring stations in a city, which Somvanshi calls a “disaster” because ozone is a hyperlocal pollutant. “Within the city, there is a massive variation and if you average it out, it will always be below the standard,” he says. WIRED reached out to the CPCB for comment but did not receive any response.

And while ozone monitoring infrastructure is robust in the capital region—Delhi and its five satellite cities have nearly 60 stations—more than 200 Indian cities don’t monitor ozone at all. The rest only have one or two ozone monitoring stations, which is basically “useless” says Somvanshi, because of the localized nature of the gas.

A quick way to mitigate the problem would be to issue targeted local ozone alerts, he says. In the US, for example, health advisories during periods of high ozone pollution warn residents to not go to refuel their cars when it is sunny outside, because petrol or diesel can evaporate to form volatile organic compounds that can further increase ozone formation. India could do something similar. Somvanshi suggests that factories could also be directed to operate during the evening or nighttime. That way, any nitrogen oxides they release wouldn’t be converted into ozone because there’s no sunlight. To reduce the precursor gasses, Arnold says the government should encourage “policies that can limit motor vehicle emissions in cities.”

As for addressing the threat to food security, Agrawal says farmers could choose crop varieties that are less susceptible to ozone. Some plants show resilience, she says, and by cross-breeding we could get crops that are less affected by it. Another solution could be to plant crops during seasons when ozone levels are low, like during the monsoon, but that’s not possible for all plants.

Above all, Arnold says, the Indian government should “take the time to understand the potential consequences of emission reductions” and learn from what happened in China. Use “modeling to try and predict the response you might get to emission control policies,” he advises. Ozone pollution, he says, cannot be ignored anymore.

[intechbulks]

The Vital Role of Dust Collector Manufacturers in Keeping Our Air Clean

Dust may seem like an insignificant nuisance, but it's anything but. Microscopic particles can wreak havoc on our health, environment, and industrial processes. Fortunately, unsung heroes stand sentinel against this silent threat: dust collector manufacturers. These companies play a crucial role in safeguarding our air quality, and Intech Bulk Handling Systems Pvt. Ltd., a leading chain conveyor manufacturers in India, stands out as a prime example.

Invisible Hazards, Tangible Impact:

Dust exposure poses significant health risks, triggering respiratory problems like asthma and allergies. In industrial settings, it can also compromise product quality, damage equipment, and even escalate fire hazards. Dust collectors combat these issues by capturing and filtering dust particles, ensuring cleaner air for workplaces and communities.

How Dust Collectors Work:

These unsung heroes come in various configurations, each suited to specific applications. Common mechanisms include:

Cyclones: Utilizing centrifugal force, they separate heavier dust particles from air.

Bag filters: Air passes through fabric bags, trapping dust while clean air exits.

Cartridge filters: Similar to bag filters, but with pleated cartridges offering higher efficiency.

Wet scrubbers: Water sprays capture dust, often ideal for sticky or hazardous materials.

Intech's Contribution to Cleaner Air:

Intech Bulk Handling Systems, while specializing in chain conveyors, also recognizes the importance of dust control. They offer a range of dust collection systems tailored to various industries, including:

Cement: High-efficiency bag filters capture fine dust particles, protecting workers and the environment.

Pharmaceuticals: Dust-free environments are crucial for product purity. Intech's systems ensure compliance with strict regulations.

Food processing: Preventing dust contamination safeguards product quality and consumer health. Intech provides solutions for both dry and wet ingredients.

Beyond Individual Companies:

The efforts of dust collector manufacturers reach far and wide. They contribute to:

Improved public health: By reducing dust exposure, they help prevent respiratory illnesses and promote overall well-being.

Environmental protection: Dust collectors control air pollution, contributing to cleaner air and mitigating climate change effects.

Enhanced industrial efficiency: Cleaner work environments and protected equipment lead to improved productivity and reduced maintenance costs.

Conclusion:

Dust collector manufacturers may not grab the headlines, but their work is essential for our health, environment, and industrial well-being. Companies like Intech Bulk Handling Systems, with their commitment to innovative solutions, exemplify the critical role this industry plays in keeping our air clean. As we strive for a healthier and more sustainable future, appreciating and supporting these silent guardians of clean air becomes ever more important.

[divinedomesticity]

Creating a Safe Haven: The Importance of Natural Cleaners in Our Homes

Hello dear homemakers and health enthusiasts! Today, let's dive into a topic that's close to my heart as both a homemaker and a naturopathic geek: the importance of using safe and natural cleaners in our homes. In our quest to create a clean and welcoming environment for our families, it's essential that we prioritize not just cleanliness, but also the health and well-being of our loved ones. Let's explore the impact of conventional cleaning products on our health, particularly on cognition and toxicity, and discover the transformative power of natural alternatives.

First and foremost, the hidden dangers lurking in many conventional cleaning products. From harsh chemicals and synthetic fragrances to toxic fumes and irritants, these products can wreak havoc on our health, compromising indoor air quality and posing risks to our respiratory system, skin, and overall well-being. But perhaps most concerning of all is the impact of these chemicals on our children, who are particularly vulnerable to their effects.

You see, kids have a knack for getting into everything—including cleaning products. Whether it's curious toddlers exploring under the sink or adventurous preschoolers mistaking colorful bottles for toys, the risk of accidental ingestion or exposure to harmful chemicals is all too real. And the consequences can be dire, ranging from mild irritations and allergic reactions to more serious health issues such as respiratory problems, neurological effects, and even poisoning.

But fear not, dear friends, for there is a solution: the transformative power of natural cleaners. By harnessing the cleansing power of nature's bounty—think vinegar, baking soda, essential oils, and plant-based detergents—we can effectively clean our homes without compromising our health or the environment. These gentle yet effective alternatives not only leave your home sparkling clean but also provide peace of mind, knowing that you're creating a safe and healthy haven for your family to thrive in.

Moreover, natural cleaners offer a myriad of benefits beyond their safety profile. They're environmentally friendly, biodegradable, and free from harmful chemicals and toxins, making them a sustainable choice for eco-conscious homemakers. Plus, they often boast antimicrobial, antifungal, and antibacterial properties, helping to combat germs and pathogens without the need for harsh chemicals or synthetic additives.

Let's make a pledge to prioritize the health and safety of our families by embracing the transformative power of natural cleaners. Let's banish harmful chemicals from our homes and replace them with gentle yet effective alternatives that nourish both body and soul. Together, we can create a clean, welcoming, and truly safe haven for our loved ones to thrive in. Here's what I'm using and loving here in the cozy little cabin.

Here's an amazing recipe I created to make your own homemade cleaner at home:

Lavender Lemonade Sparkle Spray:

Ingredients:

1 cup distilled water

1/4 cup white vinegar

10 drops lavender essential oil

5 drops lemon essential oil

1 tablespoon witch hazel

1 teaspoon liquid castile soap

Instructions:

In a clean spray bottle, combine the distilled water and white vinegar.

Add the lavender and lemon essential oils, along with the witch hazel and liquid castile soap.

If desired, add a splash of rubbing alcohol for extra cleaning power and sparkle.

Secure the spray bottle cap and shake well to mix all ingredients thoroughly.

Your Lavender Lemonade Sparkle Spray is now ready to use! Simply spritz onto surfaces and wipe clean with a cloth for a fresh, sparkling finish that leaves behind a delightful aroma of lavender and lemon.

Enjoy the unique blend of calming lavender and refreshing lemon as you clean your home, turning chores into a fragrant and uplifting experience.

Enjoy!

Love, Kimmi

[xxxtyty]

The Fae Prince (part 1)

(Implied noncon, medical, mpreg, man with vagina, fantasy)

The air was crisp and cool, the leaves crunching underfoot as the hunting party trekked through the dense forest. Their leader, a stern and battle-hardened woman with a mane of unruly hair, scanned the surroundings with a practiced eye. She was searching for any sign of the magical fae that had been wreaking havoc on their kingdom's borders. The stories of the fae prince were legendary amongst the hunters, and they all longed for the chance to capture him.

A scout had eyed him, saying he was just around this bend.

The guard sent a few men in with direction. They had him cornered.

"Show yourself, fae!" the leader shouted, her voice echoing through the trees. There was a rustle, and in a matter of seconds, the guards had tackled the creature, wrapping him in chains.

The faery prince struggled against his captors, but it was no use. He glared at them with eyes that glowed like emeralds, his wings thrashing wildly against the ground. His golden hair spilled across the damp leaves, and his delicate features were marred by anger and fear. "Let me go!" he demanded.

The leader of the hunting party approached him slowly, her sword sheathed but her hand resting on its hilt. "Your time as a free creature is over, fae," she said coldly. "You have caused too much destruction and pain." She gestured to the other guards, and they began to drag the prince away through the forest.

As they marched him back to the castle, the faery prince struggled against his captors, his strength seemingly inhuman despite his delicate appearance. The guards were impressed and wary, for they had heard tales of the fae's incredible powers.

Still, without incident, he was brought to the castle and into the throne room, before the king and queen.

"So, you are the infamous faery prince," the king said, his voice cold and unyielding. "You have caused so much chaos and heartache in our kingdom. Tell us, why?"

The prince glared at them, his emerald eyes flashing. "I sought only to protect my own," he said defiantly. "Our lands have been encroached upon, our people hunted and killed. I sought only to defend us."

“Likely story,” the king scolds. “Let the royal scholars and scientists study him, we have yet to see a faery so close.”

The faery prince is brought to a laboratory deep within the castle. The room is illuminated by flickering candles and lit by arcane light sources, casting strange shadows on the walls. A team of scientists and magicians, garbed in flowing white medical robes, await his arrival.

The prince is bound to a large stone table, his chains clinking softly as he struggles against them. The scientists begin to examine him, carefully measuring his height, weight, and wing span. They prod and poke at his delicate features, noting the iridescent quality of his dark brown and purple hair and the hue of his eyes. One of the magicians studies the intricate pattern of veins that weave through his wings, fascinated by their grace and strength.

“Let us begin a more.. thorough study,” one of the scholars suggests, gesturing to the princes robes.

Another scholar quickly removes the prince's tunic, revealing a firm, toned chest adorned with delicate, tiny gems. The prince arches his back, his muscles tensing as he struggles against the restraints. One of the scientists studies the gemstones, taking notes and swabs for further analysis.

The prince’s trousers are carefully cut from his body.

The scientists are now treated to a sight that few mortals have ever laid eyes upon: the faery prince is completely naked before them. His skin is pale and smooth, like the finest porcelain, with a faint, iridescent sheen that shifts with each movement. His muscles ripple and flex as he struggles against the restraints, and his wings spread wide to their full span, casting shadows across the room.

One scholar, an elderly woman with a sharp tongue and even sharper wit, studied the prince's genitalia with particular interest. "Hmm," she muttered, adjusting her spectacles. "Fascinating." She pointed at the prince's groin. "You see here? This is where we might find the source of your power. Your 'fae princess' as it were." She smiled slyly, enjoying the shocked expressions on the faces of the other scholars.

There, before them, was a prince… and yet, he had what seemed like a tiny penis and a beautiful vagina.

"How curious," another scholar mused.

The prince struggled against his bonds, his eyes burning with hatred. "You have no idea what you're dealing with," he spat.

The elderly woman leaned in closer, fingers tracing dangerously close to his groin. “I wonder…”

The other scientists and magicians gathered around, their curiosity piqued. The faery prince growled, struggling against his bonds. His strength was superhuman, but they had him well bound.

The elderly woman continued to study the prince's genitalia, her fingers tracing lightly over his skin. "This is most fascinating," she murmured. "Your penis is almost nonexistent. It might as well be a large female clitoris.”

One of the younger scholars, a man with a long beard and piercing blue eyes, leaned in closer. "Indeed. And your vagina is quite well-formed. It seems that you are not as male as we once believed."

The elderly woman nodded in agreement. "Yes, it's quite fascinating. It's almost as if you are a hermaphrodite, possessing both male and female reproductive organs." She glanced up at the prince, her eyes narrowing. "I wonder how this affects your mating habits."

“With a penis that small, surely he cannot inseminate a female faery,” one scholar scoffs.

The elderly woman raised an eyebrow. "Perhaps not," she hesitated. "But then, you are not a traditional male, are you?" She glanced at the other scholars, her eyes gleaming with mischief. "Perhaps it is the vagina that possesses the power. Perhaps you are the one who needs to be inseminated."

The prince's eyes widened in horror, his struggling becoming more frantic. "You don't understand," he gasped out between ragged breaths. "You are playing with fire!”

The elderly woman merely smiled, unmoved by his desperation. "Oh, but I think we do understand," she said calmly. "And we are not afraid of the fire.”

The prince's struggles grow more frantic as he realizes that they are not merely studying him, but discussing his fate as if he were a mere object..

The elderly woman smiled cruelly, enjoying the prince's desperation. "Very well," she said, her voice like ice. "If you insist. We shall need a volunteer, of course. Someone brave enough to face the consequences of touching you." She paused, her eyes flickering meaningfully around the room.

The younger scholar with the long beard stepped forward hesitantly. "I-I'll do it," he stammered. "I mean, for science." He swallowed nervously, trying to steady his trembling hands as he approached the prince. "I-I'll just... touch your vagina. To see if it's as... powerful as you say."

The elderly woman nodded approvingly, her eyes gleaming with excitement. "Very well, Doctor..." She gestured for him to continue.

The scholar tentatively placed his hand on the prince's hip, feeling the warmth radiating through the pale skin. His fingers trembled as he traced downward, brushing against the soft folds of the vagina. The prince's body tensed, his back arching away from the touch, but the bonds held fast. The scholar's heart raced, his mind reeling with the implications of what he was doing.

As he continued to explore, he noticed that the skin of the prince's vagina was smooth and unblemished, unlike any human female he had ever seen. It pulsed gently under his touch, responding to his every movement. The elderly woman leaned in closer, her eyes fixed on the scholar's every move, her expression a mixture of anticipation and curiosity.

The scholar's fingers traced delicately along the sensitive folds, feeling the warmth emanating from within. Slowly, carefully, he slid his finger deeper inside, feeling the soft, wet heat engulf him.

The prince's body convulsed, his back arching violently as he let out a guttural cry. "No! Stop it!" But the scholar was lost in the sensation, the forbidden pleasure washing over him.

The elderly woman's eyes widened with interest, her lips curling into a satisfied smile. "Fascinating," she breathed. "It seems that the vagina is indeed powerful. Perhaps it's more than just a receptacle for sperm." She glanced over at the younger scholars, their faces flushed with excitement and fear. "It appears we have much to learn about the nature of this creature."

The scholar's fingers continued to move within the prince, exploring every inch of the smooth, warm flesh. He felt a strange pulsing sensation, as if the prince's very being was responding to his touch. Something was embedded in the top side of his vagina.

The elderly woman leaned forward, her eyes fixed on the scholar's face. "What do you feel?" she asked, her voice hushed with anticipation.

The scholar swallowed hard, his fingers still buried within the prince's vagina. "I... I feel... something hard and round, inside," he managed to say. "Like a... like a pearl."

The elderly woman's eyes lit up with interest. "A pearl?" she mused. "Fascinating. Perhaps it's some sort of organ that aids in the production of this... power. Remove it, Doctor. Quickly and carefully."

“I can’t, it’s lodged in…”

The elderly scholar shoved him away, reaching into the vaginal canal herself.

The younger scholar stumbled back, shocked by the woman's sudden violence. He watched as her fingers probed deeper, searching for the elusive object. It was no use. No matter how much she poked and pulled, it wouldn’t free itself.

Finally, she withdrew her hands with a sigh of frustration. "It appears to be lodged in place," she said, her voice betraying her annoyance. "We shouldn’t just cut it out without knowing what it does.”

The younger scholar bit his lip, feeling a mixture of relief and disappointment. He glanced at the prince, who was still struggling against his bonds, his face contorted in pain. The elderly woman, however, seemed undeterred. "We'll need to find another way to study this further," she mused. "Perhaps if we observe the prince's behavior more closely, we can discern some pattern or function of the pearl."

“Perhaps it’s time to simulate intercourse. Do we still have the machine we were experimenting with?”

The younger scholar nodded, recalling the device they had built as part of their research. It was a mechanical arm with a fake penis attached, designed to mimic the motions of copulation. They had used it on several other captives before, but never with such a delicate and mysterious subject as the prince.

The decision was unanimous. With help from the royal guards, they positioned the prince onto the seat of the machine, leaning back like a bride on her wedding night. “It’s funny how much he looks like a female like this,” muses the younger scholar.

The elderly woman chuckles darkly, her gaze fixed on the control panel. "Yes, well, let's see how he fares with a bit more... stimulation." She flips a switch, and the mechanical arm begins to move, the silicone cock moving up and into position, teasing the entrance of the Prince.

“I’m a virgin!” The Prince cries out raggedly, anxious to get free.

The elderly woman gives him a cool look. "I know. But I suspect that this pearl inside of you has been altered somehow. Perhaps it's designed to react differently in the presence of another male. We'll see." She leans forward, her fingers dancing across the control panel.

With a click, the machine begins to move slowly, mimicking the gentle first thrust of intercourse. The younger scholar watches with bated breath as the mechanical cock penetrates the Prince, its cold, silicone surface rubbing against the pearl lodged inside. The Prince cries out in pain and pleasure, his body arching against the restraints.

The elderly woman adjusts a dial, increasing the speed of the machine. The mechanical arm thrusts forward, driving the cock deeper into the Prince, the pearl rubbing against his inner walls with each thrust. The younger scholar can see the Prince's chest heaving as he struggles against his bonds, his eyes rolling back in his head.

The elderly woman watches the Prince intently, her eyes darting between the controls and the Prince's reactions. After several minutes of this, she slows the machine down once more, allowing it to rock gently back and forth. The Prince gasps and moans, his body arching with pleasure despite himself.

The elderly scholar makes the arm retract completely, slick with faery cum.

"Well, it certainly seems to have heightened his arousal," she says, stepping forward again with a gloved hand. She reaches inside, feeling the pearl. “It’s still lodged, but it seems closer to the vulva somehow.”

The younger scholar frowns, puzzled. "Do you think it's changing shape or something?"

"Perhaps," the elderly woman says with a nod. "Or maybe it's a way for the mate to control him,” she smiles wickedly as the prince struggles. “That’s it, isn’t it?”

The prince was whimpering in a way none of them ever heard before as she teased the pearl repeatedly, feeling it move down, down… closer and closer to where it was meant to be. His hips bucked, seeking release, but the restraints held fast. The younger scholar looked on in fascination, his breath caught in his throat.

Plop. It dropped into his tiny, clitoral-size penis.

The elderly scholar looked at the control panel, a wicked grin spreading across her face. "Well, shall we see what happens now?"

With a click of the mouse, the machine began to move once more. The silicone rose to the prince’s entrance, thrusting in once more.

The fae responded, crying out as the pearl inside his clitoris glowed.

The younger scholar watched, fascinated, as the machine rocked back and forth. The prince's body was covered in a sheen of sweat, his muscles tense as he fought against his bonds. The elderly woman leaned forward, her gaze fixed on the control panel, adjusting the speed and angle of the mechanical cock with practiced ease.

“What if we…” she plays with the pannel again, a new nub appearing at the side. She adds something that looks like a small silicone cup, placing it over the pearled clitoris.

The Prince cries out as the device envelops his member, the new nub teasing his perineum. The elderly scholar adjusts the controls again, making the cup vibrate. The Prince's hips buck wildly, his body arching off the table as he's wracked with pleasure. The younger scholar watches, fascinated, as the elderly woman expertly manipulates the machine, driving the Prince to heights of ecstasy he's never experienced before.

[butterco]

How to Manage Frizz and Humidity: Curly Hair Products for a Smooth Finish

Introduction:

Frizz and humidity can wreak havoc on curly hair, leaving you feeling frustrated and defeated. But fear not! With the right curly hair products, you can tame those unruly strands and achieve a smooth, sleek finish. In this comprehensive guide, we'll explore the best strategies for managing frizz and humidity, as well as the Buy curly hair products online in India. Whether you're looking to enhance your natural curls or achieve a straighter style, we've got you covered.

Understanding Frizz and Humidity:

Before we dive into the world of curly hair products, it's essential to understand the root cause of frizz and humidity. Curly hair tends to be drier than straight hair, making it more susceptible to frizz when exposed to humidity. This is because the outer layer of the hair, known as the cuticle, is raised, allowing moisture from the air to penetrate the hair shaft and disrupt the curl pattern.

Choosing the Right Products:

When it comes to managing frizz and humidity, the key is to choose the right products for your hair type. Look for formulas specifically designed to hydrate and nourish curly hair, such as sulfate-free shampoos and conditioners enriched with moisturizing ingredients like coconut oil, shea butter, and argan oil. These products will help seal the cuticle, preventing moisture from penetrating the hair shaft and causing frizz.

Top Curly Hair Products:

Now that you understand the importance of choosing the right products let's take a look at some of the best curly hair products available online in India.

Moisturizing Shampoo:

Start your curly hair routine off right with a moisturizing shampoo that gently cleanses without stripping away natural oils. Look for formulas infused with hydrating ingredients like glycerin and aloe vera to help soften and smooth the hair.

Hydrating Conditioner:

Follow up your shampoo with a hydrating conditioner to lock in moisture and keep frizz at bay. Choose a rich, creamy formula that coats each strand, leaving your curls feeling soft, smooth, and manageable.

Leave-In Conditioner:

For an extra boost of hydration, consider adding a leave-in conditioner to your curly hair routine. These lightweight formulas can be applied to damp hair to help detangle, soften, and define curls while providing protection against humidity.

Curl Defining Cream:

To enhance your natural curl pattern and minimize frizz, invest in a curl defining cream. These styling products are formulated to provide hold and definition without weighing down your curls, leaving them bouncy, shiny, and frizz Shop curl products for curly hair.

Anti-Frizz Serum:

Finish off your curly hair routine with an anti-frizz serum to seal the cuticle and add a glossy finish. Look for lightweight formulas that won't leave your hair feeling greasy or weighed down, and be sure to concentrate the product on the ends of your hair where frizz is most likely to occur.

Where to Buy Curly Hair Products Online in India:

Ready to say goodbye to frizz and hello to smooth, sleek curls? Shop for the best curly hair products online in India at Butterco. We offer a wide range of top-quality shampoos, conditioners, styling products, and more, all specially formulated to meet the unique needs of curly hair. With our convenient online ordering and fast shipping, achieving the perfect curl has never been easier.

Conclusion:

Butterco Managing frizz and humidity doesn't have to be a constant battle. With the right curly hair products and a proper hair care routine, you can achieve smooth, sleek curls that turn heads wherever you go. Invest in high-quality products designed specifically for curly hair, and say goodbye to frizz for good. So why wait? Shop online today and discover the secret to beautiful, manageable curls.

[chicago-geniza]

Sorry for being relatively quiet of late, the air quality wreaked havoc on my lungs and now I've come down with some sort of cold/flu situation (fever, chills, sore throat, runny nose, joint/muscle aches, the usual Generic Virus NOS symptom cluster). Slept for 16 hours, too dizzy and weak to wash the dishes (I made a valiant, ultimately futile attempt). Would like a less boring and limited life lol. My friend invited me to his friend's band's show at one of my favorite venues this weekend but barring divine intervention there's no way I'll be well enough to go, and it would be a reckless risk COVID-exposure-wise in any case. I hate how claustrophobically constricted my life has become, just, no forseeable horizon, all the air getting choked out by illness and inaccessibility and poverty

On that note I am going to listen to The Goldfinch and stop moping!!! >:(