#it would take more time than she has to become comfrotable with it

[bookwyrminspiration]

Sophie with a sword. Thoughts?

-⚙️

girl with sword pretty

[littlegodzilla]

I'm going to post this new chapter from the cellphone, sorry if it looks weird but my PC it isn't working too well this days 😭

Howl TWD AU. Daryl Dixon x OFC 14/15.

Daryl Dixon x OFC.

Warnings; AU. M, Smut, +18, hurt/comfrot, blood, ABO references, Knot thing, a lot of references about werewolves mixed with my own imagination.

Warning this chapter. War, death, fluff. Babies. Cubs.

Outside Narrator.

Words: 4880.

Taglist: @phoenixblack89 @browneyes528 @pncnsc @purple-serenity @lilythemadqueen @twdeadfanfic @srhxpci @darylsgarden

Part 14.

They cannot get too close, they have to control every step they take, every inch they advance, they must pull it back so that the Darkness oozing from their bodies does not touch them. The poison that consumes them is so strong now that any brush with their skin could doom them as it does them.

Negan has saved some weapons without strengthening to throw them against the consumed bodies of both Alphas to call their attention at the same time that they run around them trying to keep them in that street, so that they would not move away and extend more their putrefying curse. It escapes neither of them that the wolves that accompany them begin to experience the same symptoms as them, but much milder, the dose that consumes them is much lower, possibly to be able to control and manipulate them without them turning against them when experiencing a new power, even with those it is too strong for them and they begin to fall like flies, dying from the dark power that devours them from the inside.

The black wolf throws Daryl a bone dagger, he catches it in mid-air and dodges a blow from the Governor. They are more powerful now, but also slower, which is a great advantage for them, especially for the Metis since his hybrid body is more athletic and lighter than that of his partner. He runs behind Alpha's back and throws the dagger, stabbing it accurately into the woman's forehead. However, she smiles, the viscous liquid that now runs through her body catches the object, pulling it out of the woman's forehead and throwing it back to Daryl. Daryl shields his body with his arms, receiving several cuts on his forearms and grunts in pain, running back to keep his distance.

"Ya've lost faculties, lil’brother." He hears Merle's voice beside him.

"You took the words right out of my mouth." Negan jokes, looking at the Dixons. Daryl snorts loudly.

"Can we focus on what's important?" he growls rolling his eyes. The last thing he needs is to have to deal with two Merles.

The three of them team up to deliver different blows to the two decaying wolves, their bodies increasingly losing their hybrid form, taking on something misshapen, a twisted, pained posture, skin beginning to peel off their bones, hair falling in large clumps against the asphalt. The Dark power consumes them at breakneck speed, soon they will cease to be conscious of anything and become true servants of Darkness, they will even consume the bodies of their deceased wolves to embrace more Dark power. They have to take them down before that happens.

"Daryl, Negan!" Ixeia and Lucille shout at the same time throwing the men their weapons.

Daryl regains his human form to grab his crossbow and loads the newly strengthened arrows, even the silver burns his fingertips when he touches them. He snorts and readies himself, fires the first bolt and the black viscous liquid disintegrates as he tries to protect his vessel. The wolf howls in pain as it begins to purify itself. Negan swings his bat, spinning it several times in his claws and hits Alpha's face hard. The she-wolf screams, her skin burning, the liquid shield melting away at the sheer touch of the weapon. Merle walks over to the two women wedging the metal arm into her stump and smiles crookedly towards the young she-wolf.

"Not bad, sis’." He says with a growl before turning back to the battlefield.

Negan's pack congregates where they are, they all grab a newly purified weapon and attack the wolves who pounce on them trying to regain control of the Darkness and be able to consume them, but no one gives them truce. Rick, Carol, Shane, Michonne and the others also show up ready to fight, Ixeya is about to intercept them and make them turn back, but Lucille stops her. It's her fight too. Staying away, with the silver bullets, they shoot the cursed wolves to help the rest.

Daryl's howl of victory makes everyone's hair stand on end, watching as the man has cut off the Governor's head with one of the purified machetes, back in his hybrid form. Alpha is taken down by Negan and Lucille, who also had unfinished business with the she-wolf, as she had taken several of her younger wolves, brainwashing them, only to see them now die consumed by Dark power.

Daryl lets go of the Governor's head feeling the toxin burn in his hand and falls to the ground exhausted. Again his body regains its human form, they all regain their form as exhaustion and exhaustion get the better of them. Quickly Rick and the others come over to help them, they cover them with some blankets and try to make sure their wounds are not too deep or dangerous, but they are all okay.

"You did it, lil’brother. Ya saved yer people." Daryl hears Merle's tired voice.

"Merle?" Daryl looks at him worriedly and his eyes widen with fear as he discovers the trickle of black blood gushing from his mouth. "No..." He gasps as he becomes aware that his brother is wasting away like the others. "Shit, Merle, No!" He rushes over to his brother but he gestures for hisr to stay away. "Yer a complete dick!” He yells at him in desperation.

"Could ya be nicer? I'm dyin’, ya could at least tell me ya love me." Jokes the older Dixon and Daryl roars.

"Shut the fuck up!" Fear, frustration, grief, turn to anger and poorly suppressed tears. He doesn't want his brother to die.

"All isn’t lost yet, man, we could help you heal." Negan tells him looking at the two brothers. "Maybe it's not too late..." He looks at Merle who shakes his head.

"I think that's enough for me, I've screwed up enough..."

"Oh shut up, stop playin’ the victim!" Daryl yells at her again and looks for Ixeia with his eyes who smiles approaching up to them. "Please..."

"I'll take care of him." She smiles and though she's not an expert, it's something she hasn't learned how to do yet, she dares to bring her lips together with Daryl's, in an awkward kiss. She can feel the hunter's mouth stretch against hers and she pulls away reddening. "I'm... I'm going to take him into the woods... my power is always greater there."

"Do ya need help?" the Metis offers, but she shakes her head.

"You are needed more here." She assures him and transforming she grabs Merle, walking away into the forest, as she once did with Daryl.

Shock surrounds them all, the silence is thick, the breaths ragged and the eyes glazed over. Woodbury has been shattered after the battle that has raged through its streets. Many houses collapsed, cars crushed, many people who had been trapped in the fire at the police station, who had suffered the attack of the wolves before anyone could go to help them. The fire, the smell of blood, the smoke, all of it now envelopes the small town, along with the uncontrollable sobs of those who have lost someone. The wolves need to heal, now it is the humans who must take care of their wounds, help their people and rebuild everything.

Rick slowly approaches Daryl offering him some clothes to wear and sits down next to him. The wolf says nothing, he dresses silently, too worried about too many things, his brother, Ixeia, the future of Woodbury, he can't even say for sure if he will be a part of it or be asked to leave after all that has happened because of him. Grimes drops a hand on his man and he flinches.

"We won." Says the Sheriff looking at him with a tired smile.

"But we lost a lot... Rick, I... I'm sorry... I wanted to take this away from here, but..." He tries to apologize, but Rick won't let him, he hugs him tightly, surprising the Metis who quickly goes mute.

"You had us worried, damn it. We wanted to fight too, do you know how frustrating it's been to be cooped up in Hershel's barn waiting?" He scolds him separating from him a little, yet in his eyes there is relief and affection. Daryl knows he's not really telling him off.

"Frustratin’? If ya guys came anyway, yer stubborn as a Dixon."

"No, that's hard to top." He jokes and the two men laugh good-naturedly. Rick gets up from the ground and helps his wolf brother to stand up as well. "We've got a lot of work ahead of us, think we can ask them for help?" He says looking at Negan and his pack.

"They need to rest and get their strength back too. If they taste Carol's food I'm sure they'll do anything." Again they both laugh and Rick nods.

"Come on and don't worry, trust Ixeia."

"I trust her..." He mumbles, but can't help but feel something tightening in his stomach.

The people of Woodbury have left the town when they have been able to process what has happened, they have decided to leave that 'cursed' place to seek peace elsewhere. A fresh start. No one has refused to do so, Daryl feels pain and remorse for not having been able to avoid that destruction and massacre, but he understands the position of the people who did not know their secret. Others have decided to stay, Negan's pack is helping to repair the houses that have been destroyed, along with Rick and the others all working side by side to bring Woodbury back to what it was. It has taken a lot of explaining to those who have decided to stay, Daryl knows that they will not easily forgive him for what has happened in those days, but he also knows that they will now feel more protected by having him there. Pain and relief are always two sides of the same coin.

Merle returned after several days, he had managed to recover, the Darkness toxin had not damaged his organism enough for all to be lost, Ixeia needed all her potential as Priestess to heal him, but finally the Metis had returned. Even though it had all started with him, Rick and his were sympathetic, they accepted the apologies the elder Dixon had prepared for them, but he didn't want to stay there, it wasn't his territory, he knew Daryl could take care of that place on his own.

"Where are ya goin’?" Daryl asks him blowing the smoke from his cigarette out of his nose, very slowly.

"Negan offered me a position among his men, there's a lot of bullshit rules and a lot of laws to abide by, but I think it's where I belong." He says with a shrug. "We're a lot alike, don't you think? Plus I like Lucille, that woman's got balls."

"Don't say that too loud or ya'll run out of yers." Jokes Daryl getting Merle to let out a loud laugh, but he knows he's right, he has to be careful, and not just because of Negan. "Have ya heard from Ixeia?" he asks in a whisper looking sideways at his brother. Merle is mute and averts his gaze, shaking his head.

"She left, when the ritual was over, she left, she didn't tell me anything, she just disappeared into the forest." He tells him and Daryl nods, Merle puts an arm around his shoulders wanting to encourage him. "I'm sorry, bro..."

"It's... I'm fine... She belongs in the forest, maybe she needs to purify herself... I'm not worried." He tries to say in a firm voice, but hesitates as he finishes the sentence, averting his gaze so his brother doesn't see the worry in his eyes.

"She'll be back, she's yer Omega, yer linked..." She tries to cheer him up again and Daryl shakes his body, unable to say anything specific.

"Merle, it's time to leave." Negan then appears by Daryl's cabin, always next to his trusty bat resting on his shoulder.

"All right, take care, brother." He says to Daryl, the hunter tosses the cigarette away and stands up hugging his big brother. "If she comes back, and ya guys have puppies someday, let me know, they have to meet their Uncle Merle."

"Shut yer mouth." He growls, but a chuckle escapes between his teeth feeling his cheeks redden. "Take care of yerself, and ain’t fuck up." He warns her. "Ya've been given a second chance."

"I know, I know, I'm the big brother, remember? Ya don't have to give me life lessons." Merle jokes and Daryl rolls his eyes.

It's been almost two months since they started setting everything up, Negan and Lucille have to go back to their own territory, it's been too long and it could be dangerous, someone could have tried to claim it and leaving it with minimal protection no one was ensuring their territory was safe. Daryl, along with the others, say goodbye to the herd. Rick and Daryl approach Negan and Lucille holding out their hands in a gesture of peace.

"Thank you for helping us in this battle. You guys have been a big help." Rick says and tenses for a second when Lucille hugs him warmly.

"Thanks to you guys, we've been after these rebels for too long and finally peace is coming back." He smiles and Negan nods, giving Daryl a gentle slap on the back.

"Plus we've stopped the spread of the Darkness, they surely would have taken over everything if they had gotten to the Elders. We're fucking heroes." Laughs the man and Daryl snorts.

"Don't get so excited... But thanks all the same and thanks for taking Merle in..."

"Don't worry, he needs a little rough handling, but I know he'll grow into a good little puppy." Jokes Negan again, but Daryl flinches, he's sure the man is going to make good on what he just said.

"I would appreciate it if this town would remain human in the knowledge of our own." He then asks Lucille. "I don't want any more surprises..." The woman nods and now hugs the hunter who reciprocates her embrace.

"Don't worry, no one will know from our side, you will continue to live in peace."

"Thank you, have a good trip." Rick then tells them.

They have packed them several boxes of supplies, some food and water for the road, hey don't know how far they are going, but it is the least they can do after the hard battle they have had to share. Several of the wolves transform into humans to load the old borrowed cars with everything the people have brought them there and the rest start their march getting lost in the trees of the forest. Lucille and Negan are the last to reunite with their people, saying goodbye once more before disappearing, leaving them all in a pleasant calm, in a peaceful silence.

"What are we going to do now?" asks Carol looking at her friend.

"Yer well within yer rights to throw me out if ya wanna... I brought this and..." He can't finish the sentence as Rick gives him a hard smack on the head that shuts him up.

"What are you saying? you really think we're going to kick you out of town like a dog? Sorry for the expression..." He rolls his eyes. "You saved us, Daryl, you're part of Woodbury, you belong here." He insists and the man lowers his head sheepishly. "What are we going to do now? Carry on as usual, rebuild the precinct, there are still some things left to recover, our people need to get back to normal. Nothing has changed..."

Everyone nods, they know it will cost to get back to that normalcy that Rick says hasn't changed, but those who have decided to stay know that not only humans live with them, they have decided to adapt to it, it doesn't mean they will ever again have to deal with a fight like the one that has crumbled the town, but at least they know they will be protected in case it happens. The people who have stayed, now look at Daryl differently, the distrust and murmurs, have now turned to respect and they try to establish a relationship with the wolf, who is as uncomfortable as they are when they interact.

Daryl tenses then, something in his chest tightens as they all begin to walk away. His nose has detected a special scent, he knows who it is. His eyes searching desperately for where she is. His pulse is still racing. Carol and the rest who were leaving detect that Daryl has suddenly become nervous. The woman turns to walk back to her best friend, but stops in her tracks when she sees a wolf approaching in the distance that she instantly recognizes.

"Daryl..." The white-haired woman says to him, holding her hands to her chest.

Daryl spins on his own axis to see the she-wolf approaching. His whole body trembles as he discovers her in her wolf form. It could be for many reasons, but she is healthy, he feels it, there is nothing wrong with her, the purification she carried out with Merle has left no after-effects. She is in her wolf form for another reason. His heart is pumping at full speed as he approaches her, the young woman stops as he kneels down and hugs her furry neck, caressing her head with utmost affection. Ixeia moans low at his touch and rubs her head against him, wagging her tail contentedly back home.

"Daryl, what's wrong? is she okay?" worries Carol as she sees that the young girl doesn't change her shape.

"There's nothin’ wrong with her..." He breaks away from the young she-wolf a little and strokes her fur. "She's just bein’ a good mother, isn't she?" He smiles again having a giddy feeling in his stomach as he says it out loud.

"Mo-mother? Oh God, is she...?" Carol is at a loss for words, everyone is as surprised as she is, they have walked up to the couple and notice that actually, the young woman's body is rounder than usual. "I'm going to be a grandmother?" She manages to say and Daryl laughs snorting through his nose.

"So it seems... Is that why ya've been alone in the forest?" He asks the whimpering she-wolf, lowering her head. "Hey, it's okay, I understand, but ya scared the hell out of me." He assures her stroking her head. "Ya can't just disappear like that, we're family now remember?" he smiles feeling his cheeks burning because the others are watching him with a smile on their faces. "Let's go home, I'll make ya a nest ya'll be comfortable in." He promises her and she barks contentedly and licks Daryl's cheek who smiles.

"Are you going to spend the pregnancy in that form?" Andrea asks curiously.

"It's her natural form, as Lupus is more comfortable this way. It will be a while before she returns to her human form, but don't worry about that, it's a natural process."

"As long as you guys don't do anything weird..." Shane jokes earning a reproachful look from everyone and a punch on the arm from his wife.

"Will you set up her nest in the cabin? Do you need us to help you with anything?" Rick offers, but Daryl shakes his head.

"I'll take her home, my cabin now smells like too many people, too many wolves, she wouldn't be comfortable there." He explains, stands up and takes the wolf in his arms which protests at the gesture wanting to bite him, but he settles her better in his arms. "It's yer punishment, ya've disappeared for almost two months, now stick to the consequences." He tells her amused and she barks again, snorting.

It is a strange process, not only for the she-wolf that being a first time she feels nervous, it is also for Daryl, he had not planned in his life to be a father, not because he didn’t want to, but because he was convinced that physically it wasn’t possible, however there he was, he had left Ixeia on the couch of his house while he was relocating the nest she once built for herself to sleep more comfortable because the beds didn’t give her confidence. He smiles at the memory, however now she needs to be more comfortable not only for herself but also for her cubs, so he picks up everything that was on the floor, cushions, sheets, some branches and leaves from the forest, she was a being deeply tied to nature, so bringing part of the forest with her made her feel more at home. He relocates the sofas to make a wider nest and goes upstairs carrying two mattresses that he will place as the base of the nest, not only for her, he himself will be grateful that his bones stop hitting the ground every time he is with his she-wolf. She watches his movements from the couch as he lays out the mattresses making a comfortable surface to then place everything else on top, repositioning the things that smell of her and now also carry his own scent.

Daryl stands to the side of the nest waiting for her to move, the she-wolf carefully climbs down from her position sniffing the work her mate has done sniffs and scratches a bit on the cushions to settle them against her paws and lays down sighing heavily, she closes her eyes tired, her pregnancy is quite advanced, it won't be long before she gives birth and any movement easily saps her energy. The hunter crawls over the mattresses to lie down next to her, still keeping his human form so that she gets used to his scent, so that the cubs will associate both scents when they are born. Ixeia whimpers low licking the hand that strokes the fur on her neck, Daryl transforms into his wolf form when she calls him, carefully he walks to stand behind her, wrapping his body around her with his own, providing warmth, resting his head against her back, she calms down resting her head on her Alpha's paws and closes her eyes to rest.

There are a couple of weeks when no one hears from the couple. Among the wolf's friends there is a bit of nervousness and confusion, they don't understand how the process of that pregnancy works, but it is clear that they are both busy and won't be available for a while. Jesus and the others tell them the situation, they explain that Ixeia is in constant rest because of the pregnancy and Daryl is with her for everything she needs, he is in charge of going out to hunt, of making the nest more comfortable when she is not, he protects her and provides her with more warmth and also unifies his scent to hers so that when the cubs are born Ixeia does not reject him believing that he could attack her little pups. Daryl would never be able to do something like that, much less to his own pups, but right now they are both pure instinct and their inner animal is guiding them through the whole process. Of course going into the she-wolf's house now, without either of their permission, would be insane, Daryl's territory has been specially narrowed down to that house and he could become particularly aggressive in order to protect his mate and his pups.

"You have to wait for Daryl to let you in." Jesus has told them to keep them calm, though he hasn't succeeded at all.

"I'd love to be able to see them...they must look adorable the two of them together now." Dares Michonne to comment rocking little RJ in her arms.

"Just have to be a little more patient, Ixeia's back in town almost to give birth, she was probably fortifying herself in the woods, it's a matter of days before Daryl comes and..." He mutes smiling. "Here he comes."

They all turn around like a spring, they were in the backyard of Carol's house spending the Saturday afternoon eating and enjoying a quiet day among friends, although winter was falling on them, that morning the sun was nice and the temperature wasn’t too low so they could be outside with a jacket over and not freeze to death. A wolf with a slight limp was walking towards them at a slow pace but seemed nervous.

Rick is the first to react, he rises from his chair like a spring as the rest mimic him walking towards the wolf who stops in his own path and waits for them there. Daryl wags his tail in a positive manner and turns around to guide them home. There is a moment of hesitation when they are at the door of it, perhaps there are too many of them, coming in at once might make the new mother nervous, but Daryl slips through the half open door without waiting for them to follow. Aaron, Abraham and Jesus wait outside, their wolf status keeps them out, respect for their Alpha. The others dare to enter slowly, discovering the couple in the living room, on top of their new nest.

The exclamation of tenderness in generalized, Daryl has returned to his Omega's side, surrounding her with his body to keep the puppies warm, he licks the young girl's muzzle congratulating her for her effort and washes the two little puppies that don’t stop suckling avidly, that way the scent of mother and father mix in them so they aren’t strangers to each other. Ixeia looks up for a second and a small growl escapes her throat at the sight of them all there, for a moment they recoil, but Daryl growls in turn, calming her down by making her understand that she has nothing to worry about. She instinctively calms down by letting them move a little closer to them so they can see the two little pups. They are larger in size than a newborn puppy of any wolf would be, due to their condition as werewolves, but they both look strong and healthy. Hershel dares to get a little closer in case he detects any physical abnormalities. Daryl then joins in, taking one of the puppies in his jaws, Ixeia whimpers in concern, but the wolf shakes himself and leaves the little cub in the hands of the vet.

Hershel can't understand animal language like Negan or Laura would, but he understands what Daryl is asking him with his eyes. He smiles taking the puppy with great care and gets ready to examine it; he moves its paws, turns its head, weighs it in his hands and runs his fingers along its spine, the animal barks looking for its mother's protection and Daryl gives it a gentle touch with his muzzle to calm it down.

"He's perfect, boy, you have nothing to worry about." Hershel tells him before the werewolf leaves him back with his mother and hands him the other one.

She's a little smaller, her weight is lighter, but he can't find her any visible deformities that would worry his parents either. They are a boy and a girl. Two Lupus who have inherited a good bloodline from their parents, Hershel has no doubt that Daryl is also good despite that absurd condition as Metis, the male has a darker color, with gray and white stripes and the female has a very soft tan and white tone. Both have extremely soft fur, like a velvet blanket, they give off a warmth and smell very characteristic of puppies. If it weren't for the fact that Hershel knows the parents of these creatures, he would be convinced that he has two real wolf cubs on his hands. Daryl places the puppies back with their mother and bangs his head against hers, congratulating her once again.

"I don't know when they will transform into human children." Hershel speaks again. "But they are very healthy wolf cubs. Congratulations." He congratulates the two wolves and they wag their tails at the same time.

"There's still time for that." Aaron's voice is heard from the door of the house, to keep his distance. "At least two more months, it all depends on their condition, being born as Lupus they feel more comfortable in their wolf form, but if they recognize the scent of their parents being human, they too will change."

"You guys have some very complicated laws..." Carl protests but everyone nods in agreement to his words.

"Gaia made us that way." Aaron jokes.

"You guys can come in, yer of the pack too." Daryl's voice is heard, much huskier than usual due to the time he has been transformed as a wolf. They turn to look at him, he is back as a human next to the she-wolf, covering his nakedness with one of the sheets, Ixeia settles her head against his thigh wagging her tail as he strokes the fur on her back and neck. "Ya've done very well, girl, did ya hear Hershel? The puppies are perfect." She whines low and wags her tail a little faster.

Everyone smiles at the calm, sweet tone the Ranger uses with the young girl, the pups stop feeding and move awkwardly across the surface seeking the warmth of their mother's fur. Daryl picks them up with extreme care resting them against his chest, purring low. Jesus and the other wolves peek over the side of the nest to introduce themselves to the newborns. The Alpha joins a little to get closer to his companions. They wag their tails excitedly, sniffing the snout of each puppy, licking them with great care. The mother watches them silently behind her Alpha, but alert because she has to defend her cubs.

To be continued...

Next chapter

See you in the next chapter! The last one!!

I hope you liked it!!

[i-may-be]

hi!! may i request a romantic matchup with a male and female for genshin impact?? my pronouns are they/them, and my type is ISFP 6w5. i’m a very blunt and straightforward person who speaks my mind no matter the consequences, and i tend to unintentionally offend people with my honesty at times. i have a rather dry sense of humor, i become more comfortable with people when i tease and poke fun at them. i’m quite anxious and have a tendency to worry a lot as much as i try to hide it, so i like people who are calm and easygoing in contrast that have a very comforting presence. protective people are <333 i obviously don’t like feeling pressured or criticized. my style of clothing usually varies between alt or dark academia. my hobbies are writing and drawing, and i also like astronomy & stargazing! thank you!!!

hello! thank you for choosing this blog for your matchup <3

ROMANTIC FEM!MATCHUP:

HOW YOU MET

You had an injury, a fairly serious one. You were sent to be healed by Barbara because she does open medical service.

SO your there and she's looking at your wound and she's paching it up and she's like "you should be ok, please rest easy and take good care of yourself :)" because sweetheart moment amirite.

And so you rest, you take your time, you get better! Once you're able to, you decide to repay Barbara for her kindness and give her some snacks you bought!

You both start making small talk when you hand it over to her, and she's all like "!!! woah you're so cool and chill, thank you for giving me these <3" she's not used to being given gifts after healing people, maybe just mora, so this is nice!!

RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS

I feel like she's so protective??? But not in the usual way more in like a sorta "I love you and cherish you so if anyone ever intentionally hurts you, I will seperate you from them and protect you from them until you are ready to face them yourself" kinda way?????

I don't know what kind of drawings you do but draw her please <3 She will sit still and let you draw her portrait and even if it has been smoothered with mud and blood she is like: "o mi gosh i love this you are the best person you are so talented I love you"

She's the type to blush with embarrasment when you poke fun at her. It's not that she doesn't like it, she just gets so flustered and seeing you comfrotable makes her go 0//0 (I dont have emojis do not comment). Once she gets used to it she becomes better at moving on though.

HANGING OUT

Teach her about astrology I beg!! Go stargazing with her and point out the constellations!! Talk about the cool ass star things I don't know!! I feel like she already knows a bit because of Mona.

I feel like hanging out with Barbara contains a lot of her randomly running off and then coming back and continuing the conversation as normal. I feel like it's just a habit she's grown cause she's so busy ack.

Learning things together!! I feel like she enjoys going to the library and picking out books. She's an academic, what can I say. She's a smart person who enjoys learning and bringing you with her to learn is something she would jump at an oppourtunity for!!

ROMANTIC MALE!MATCHUP: Kaedehara Kazuha

HOW YOU MET

It was by chance that you both met. It was a night at Wangmin Resturaunt and you were having a meal! Very nice, one more familiar than Xiangling's many scary ideas.

But. much to your surprise, the peaceful night was interrupted by the Crux crew having dinner not to far away.

So you get dragged into the conversation and it is very very awkward. But hey, they were nice and it was kinda drama talk so yk

So you just ended up talking amongst each other. You part ways and it's all grand but oh! You meet Kazuha on the street again and recognise each other! Fun strangers-to-lovers schenaigans(did i spell that right?) ensues.

RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS

I feel like... really cute nicknames. The kind of bitch to call you "my star" or "darling" or something similar. Something that's kinda fancy and feels so full of commitment. He also loves how your name sounds, he likes to say it sm. He likes to refer to you a lot verbally in whatever way he can.

I think he would like to match your style in some way. I'm not sure how, but he would really like to. Like maybe he has a jumper that matchs your dark academia style but also has a huge assortment of acessories that are in an alt style. I don't know but something like that would be cute n' cool.

I don't think he has many big laughs but dry humor is his thing. He'll sometimes go into a fit of really low giggles because you caught him off guard. It's a rare sight but it is very sweet :]

HANGING OUT

Exchanging writing!!! He writes poems and you also write!! He thinks that your an inspiration so hearing your work makes him go "oh!! I have a spectacular idea, thank you for being such an inspiration to me!!!"

If you ever got really anxious, he'd take you out on walks together to just talk! He would let you just talk about whatever you want without judgement. Maybe you want to rant about a show your watching or something that happened in your day. He wants to be a safe place you can come to <3

Mf would show off impress you by using his vision to fly you up to the highest rooftops and stargaze with you on them <3 I feel like he would memorise a few constellations when he finds out you enjoy stargazing.

[cynicalrainbows]

Im glad you liked it hehe! Jane is really fun to make hc/new characterizations for (I’m someone who likes to write myself, and characters are my fav part of most story telling). I think it’s mostly due to the fact that I feel her song can get a little misinterpreted at times (this is largely due to the fact that it’s a ballad and ballads can be very vague). I could go on a whole ramble about what I think the song is about the line/cut line from it but to keep it short- I see her song as her in denial and realizing/reminiscing on her relationship with Henry and seeing that it was emotional ab*sive (the whole song chorus is like she’s going to battle) but she stood firm and wanted to focus her true love on her child (regardless of gender). To me that and her part in “Six” gives me an idea of a Jane who was hurt and used before but just wants now to live her life to fullest, with true freedom in what she can say or think or do with no one stopping her . And she wants to do all this with the queens, her new family.

Mom!Jane is adorable, she’s a sweetheart but a Jane that’s a little more fiery, a little more chaotic, and much more teasing hits a little different. And well that changes her dynamic with everyone but I just wanted to focus on Anne cause I also think differently about her as well (like i think she’s smart as hell through the whole fake competition since she’s trying to get the audience to like her and she does a decent job at that... she’s pretty neat I think). I do think Katherine fits in well too, with Anne also acting like an older sibling but Kat and Jane (even tho Jane is older than Kat) being more in the same level with stuff. Kat’s not as chaotic as Jane but she’s more “eh why not I’m in” cause it just makes her happy to hang out with them.

Anger is such an exhausting emotion but something I learned once from a therapist of mine is that it’s sometimes an emotion that’s covers up what you’re really feeling. It’s easier to be angry at something then to be truly vulnerable, but when you recognize the underlying cause and have people who can support you through it, it can become easier to be vulnerable. That can definitely apply here, where Anne and Jane become much more vulnerable with eachother. Anne would then learn about all the shit Jane went through with her family and Henry (hearing that he threatened to have her beheaded like Anne during the pilgrimage of grace incident would make her both angry and bring out a protective instinct). She would be the one to comfort Jane on the idea that she didn’t go through much cause “You totally got screwed over too! We all did! Just cause it was different pain, doesn’t mean it’s not valid pain!”

Her reigning Jane is mostly her making sure Jane doesn’t go too far (Anne had to stop her from trying to bake stuff faster by upping the temperature too many times to count), but she can’t help but be happy at the fact that Jane feels comfortable enough to do stuff like that or joke around with the queens at all with no fear of extreme punishment (not that they would punish her, but like... trauma sucks).

(And yeah I definitely agree on the point on the illiteracy hc, as we only know so much in her education but it wouldn’t be a surprise that she might have been slightly illiterate given the time. I just also like the hc of her having dyslexia cause of the fics that cover it, specifically HMA64 I love their fics dearly)

And yes, i thought of it once and thought “god that’s adorable, i have to include this”. With every groan from the other queens lips at each of Jane’s puns, Anne gets more and more proud :D.

And im seriously happy you liked it (I mean I didn’t think I would start to hc stuff about a musical about the six wives of Henry the eighth but like ehh historical fiction is a thing and writing has always been about what ifs, so why not)! And well I’m sure if I think of something you might like again, I’ll share it :).

Oh my god I was replying to an ask, scrolled down slightly and did a double take, wondering how I’d missed this post- and THEN remembered getting it, reading it and being like ‘Oh I don;t have time to give this amazing as the attention to deserves so I’ll save it-’ and then I think life just got in the way and it slipped from my mind entirely- and anon I’m so sorry! I promise I wasn’t ignoiring it on purpose but I do feel like a very ungrateful wench after you went to such trouble to send such an interesting ask!

I agree that Jane gives the impression of recognising how awful Henry was in her song- idk if you’ve seen the tour cast but the Jane I saw did an amazing job of just coming across as someone who had been very wounded and who was only just giving herself permission to sort of slowly realise it wasn’t her fault and that she didn’t deserve it, like she was still in the habit of excusing him but was slowly relaising how wrong it was.

I can definitely imagine Kitty and Jane being on a similar sort of level, out of the cousins- they’re the two youngest, the two least well educated, both were sort of pushed into Henry’s bed (Jane just came out of it a lot better), both were meant to be sort of ‘dresh start’ queens: Jane was the good wife after the temptress Nan Bullen and Kitty was the pretty young girl married for love after the doomed arranged marriage of politics. So I like the idea of them getting on as friends and equals rather than just Mother and Child.

Omg imagine Jane finally having the courage to make a joke or tease another queen and like it’s really mild but she still flinches and freezes- so the others make sure to laugh and make it clear that they’re really thrilled she’s comfrotable enough to realx a bit (and then they unleash a monster because Jane discovers puns....)

[fluffyballme]

Garden

Let's put this in their second year, because we all know they are school sweethearts

It was sunday and spring just started which means Neville will be there to see his beautiful flowers grow

He dressed fast and eated faster and if Harry wasn't staring at Draco he would be suprised of why is he hurrying so much

But Hermione explained him (because she is good friend and remembers when her firends talks about something they love) as she continued reading book

And so he made it to green house just in time and oh god he could already see small flowers growing! Spring is-

There was anoder boy, at his flowers, smelling them and talking to them- what is going on?

,,Umm sorry uh.. who are you?"

,,Theodore Nott"

He was Slytherin, he heard about him

He was different from other Slytherins Neville met, he was much more caring than other Slytherins, he heard about him because kids weren't so nice so they talked behinde his backs mean stuff about "how he could be Slytherin when he should be Hufflepuff!" and other mean things he doesn't even want to remember

And that boy- Theodore made him feel.. weird

He had small curls at end of his hair, like really small, he smiled to him- he also had most beautiful smile ever and his eyes, god his eyes

,,I am sorry I just wanted to see these flowers-" he started to explain himself and why he is here but just stopped, ,,I am sorry, I will leave if I am making toruble"

He apologised and wanted to leave but Neville couldn't let him leave

,,No! Uh I mean, no you can stay, I mean I have nothing against you here because this is school's and everybody is welcome- I am sorry, I am talking to much"

And Theodore laughed and Neville felt like he could die instantly, his laugh was soo cute that it made Neville blush and amile softly

,,How is this plant called?"

,,Leaping Toadstools"

,,Oh and that?!"

,,Mimbulus mimbletonia"

,,And that! What's that? It looks soo beautiful!"

,,Uhh it's just Narcissus."

,,Oh.."

Neville just couldn't help but smile/blush whole time Theodore was asking him

And from that moment they just somehow started to hang more and more, it just happened

It started as hang outs in green house and then as learning sessions, walking around halls together and even eating together

Sometimes if day was bad other would take food from great hall for both and would sit on wall eating silently enjoying each others company

They became inseaprable

And finally in 4th year Neville got courage to ask him out

Both never realised they were falling in love but they were, hard

Theo blushed hard when Neville (finally) asked him out

And Neville was so stupid because he thought Theo would reject him- quoting Theo Nott's words!

On their first date Neville was a little late and he got good reason, he was picking narcissa's for Theo because now Neville made plan, from now on till rest of his life he will give Theo one narcissa after he got from work (not that he was so madly in love that he was already planing marrying Theo and spending rest of his life with him, certanly not!)

Theo blushed when Neville explained why he was late

But loved Neville even more because of how caring and sweet person he is

And so they dated, at first it was awkward for both because they were also each other's best friends but what they felt wasn't friendly, it was more than friendly feelings

They were school sweethearts, both socialy awkward to show it in public but alone they couldn't get enough of each other

And then everything started

(Theo for every Neville's birthday sended him present and one narcissus in sign of love)

Dark Lord is back.

Death Eaters were called and Neville not knowing Theo's family were Death Eaters, talked about how he joined Dumbledore's Amry and he should too! He praised everything against Dark Lord and Theo agreed , he hated Dark Lord and loved his family

Neville was always caring boyfriend and he will stay one forever, but it was just he never noticed Theo being off, he never noticed Theo being forced into being Death Eater

And so war started and everybody had their side; one heart broken in two peices, both good but teared into something more than themselves

But Theo decided he couldn't do it

So he ran and ran and ran

He run to try to find Neville, he wanted him, needed his soft hugs, softer kisses and his calming voice telling him everything's gonna be fine

He found him just before fight started, Neville was preparing for fight all tensed

He noticed Theo and he wanted nothing more than run to him and give him biggest hug ever, but he can't, he couldn't

He ignored him and Theo's poor heart broken every time more and more until he screamed on top of his lungs at Neville making him listen

He explained that he (and Draco, Blaise and Pansy and half of Slytherins) were forced into becoming Death Eaters because of their pureblood families, he apologised for not telling him, for just running away from him, for everything he could

And Neville kissed him hard and pssionate- he never kissed him like this unless they were having small make out sessions-

That was last time Theo saw him (he had to defent Hogwarts) and so did Theo, this was his true home

He stood next to Draco and Blaise looking at Harry's dead face and crazy lunatic of wizard being happy over finally killing a teenager

Draco screamed on top of his lungs when he saw Harry's dead body in Hagrids amrs

They all fought together, side by side

They all sat down in circle next to each other cuddiling still in shock

He was in Neville's conforting arms, everything was already better

(everyone spend their summer in Grimudal place taking care of each other, it was better with company)

Eight year came and every student got job help rebuilding Hogwarts

Neville got to rebuild Green house with Theo and planting plants, drawing on pots, cleaning mess and making new furniture for Green house was Neville's best dream ever and he wish never to wake up

,,Neville, look! Narcissus are growing, who planted them?"

,,I did- uh that's our flower so I had to, you know plant that one too ove-" he was cut off by Theo kisssig him with biggest smile on his face

_

It was hot summer day, it just fited for late July weather. In early morning was still cold and little foggy but at 12 it already started to brun, afternoon was kind of better but only from 5 and then night falls and it was once more colder.

Neville was just sitting on ground in garden, it was around 6pm and he was enjoying in shade that house made while slight wind was making perfect shade for Neville to take care of his plants.

It was late July, to be more precise it was 30th of July Neville's birthday. Whole day owls were just flying in and out of their house bringing birthday cards sending him best wishes, much love and even more happines and of course teasing how old he is now. All of them made him happy and he loved every single one of his friends, he was luckiest man alive to have such great friends and even better husband- Theodore Nott, oops Theodore Longbottom.

Today Neville got to sleep late in morning, to be precise he woke up at 10am and there was already over 20 letters waiting for him to be opened. But also there was no sight of his husband, actually his husband went missing for whole day but Neville was sure he's doing something very important so he didn't want to bother but also that meant he would have whole day for himself to relax and enjoy on his birthday.

So he did. Whole day he waited for weather to cold down so he could go out and take care of his beautiful and big garden. And it finally cold down, it was perfect time to garden and drink tea or some cold drink in garden. So he made himself a cup of tea and put on table on balcony they had to cold down a little while he took his tools for garden and went in garden.

,,There you are!" Soon enough Neville heard so fimiliar voice behind him and he recognised it the second he heard his voice.

,,Oh there you are! I was now a little worried where are you whole day." Neville confessed as he was about to stand up to greet his husband but it was too late, Theo already kneeld down to kiss his beloved husband.

,,Yeah well I was searching for something special and it's of course for you." Theo said slightly moving away from Neville's comfrotable pressence to get what was in bag, ,,Here you go, new plant book! I knew yoy were searching for this for a long time and well I kinda pulled few strings to get it," Theo confessed and laughed to himself a little and he continued, ,,and how would this be your birthday without these," Theo suddenly pulled from his back beautiful white flowers; narcissus. ,,happy birthday love." Theo wished to Neville as he pulled him from kiss and smiled softly while he still conected their forheads together.

,,Thank you love." Neville thanked him as he smiled softly being blessed he has such husband, God was he lucky.

Im literally posting this in 23:15, but i was preparing for hospital im going in tomorrow so i didnt have time to finish this but whatever; happy birthday to one of my fav characters ever, he learned me that i can be who i am no matter how i look outisde its important who i am inside! So here it is for neville and he's lovely husband, happy birthday! <3

[dicecast]

End of Evangeline doesn’t know itself

     So a major theme of End of Eva is a giant “Fuck you” to Otaku culture and the Eva fandom in particular, and it is designed to strike directly at their creepy sense of entitlement, their insecurity, their extreme sexism, and their total spinelessness.  Shinji as the audience stand in is shown as basically a Gamergater, an insecure, shrill loser whose mass of insecurities make him impossible to be reasoned with and his internalized fear of rejection means that he can’t have normal relationship with people, in particular women.  Even the things he likes he destroys through his obsession and sense of ownership, such as when he masturbates to completion over the unconscious body of his friend who was wounded in battle.  It serves as a pretty good critic of Otaku culture and the entire creepy obsessive nerd fandom that surrounds it, and it is a really pointed response to the fandom who hated the original ending because it wasn’t a combat filled wish fulfillment fantasy.  So it is taking their self insert character and revealing him to be what the fandom is, a pathetic weakling who projects his insecurities on those around him rather than make any real attempt to face his problems directly.  Solid premise, and a nice way of calling out Nice Guy bullshit.  

Here is the problem....Shinji has never been a self insert character

(Pictured, not a power fantasy) 

     So the thing about Eva is that as much as people remember the weird existentialist shit, the vast majority of the show is....a pretty standard mecha anime (by which I mean its bad...its really bad).  It isn’t until the the show has to rewrite its own script and Ano has a mental breakdown that the show really starts to get interesting and actually worth a damn, but but most of the time it kinda is just standard.  The characters are bit better written than their arch type demands, but until the last few episodes Asuka, Rei, Misato and Ritsuko (all the other characters are terrible) are still very much their ‘role’, Asuka is still a Tsundere tough loud girl trope, Misato is the party girl/cool mom character, Rei is the quiet girl etc etc you get the idea.  They are better written than most, but they are still very much their arch type until the ending where suddenly they show their true selves.....

(once upon a time there wasn’t a standard trope)

     Except Shinji.  Shinji from the start stands out like a sore thumb in the whole process because...he isn’t an anime hero.  He really isn’t a hero at all, not in a moral sense, a mythic sense, or even a personal sense.  And he knows it too, I know the ‘reluctant hero” trope is a thing, but there is no protagonist ever who just wants to stay home and not go on an advnture as much as Shinji.  Now I hated the first episode of EVA....a lot, like I really really hated that opening episode, and if I wasn’t being paid I likely wouldn’t have kept going, but there was one moment where I kinda woke up and was like “huh.....thats....not what I expected’.  Which is when Gendo (aka worse character in the series) is like “You must accept your destiny” and Shinji is like “no”....not out of any moral sense or dramatic rejection, or even refusal of the call, but simply because he....is too emotionally depressed.  I mean compare this to Buffy, a character who is introduced Refusing the Call

   (Buffy, another main character who isn’t appreciated enough by the fans) 

 Buffy is rejecting the call but she is already a hero, and she is rejecting it for other responsibilities, and even then her desire to fight evil is just so strong she can’t stay home, she is a hero at heart who is just rejecting herself Shinji is not, Shinji is the least heroic person in the world suddenly being told he has to save the world and if he fucks up everybody dies.  

      Now remember, we don’t know who these characters are, we just met them but...when the fuck in anime does the main character be told out right that he is the chosen one and he has a destiny to save the world and the main character basically says “I am too emotionally unhealthy for this, please come back later”.   LIke the Refusal of the Call isn’t suppose to come until later in the story line, and Shinji is just so pathologically uninterested in being a hero that honestly....that was interesting.  Shinji gets a lot of hate but personally, for most of the show he was the one thing that kinda worked for me, the one character who was just so...not what the show wanted him to be that he stood out.  I mean lets talk about Shinji

(pictured...a power fantasy)

    Shinji is a deeply emotionally unhealthy sad person who has extremely low self esteem and has absolutely no spine, passively doing what other people tell him to do and basically living his life on an insecurity based auto pilot.  I think my absolute favorite scene is where it is shown that he practices the cello  every day and is asked if he liked it and he doesn’t have an answer.  And when asked why he practices, he is says he was told to practice when he was a kid so he he just does...this guy is just on inertia his whole life.  But the thing is, SHinji knows it.  He is acutely aware of his own failings, but has no sense of direction, will, or frankly audience to know what to do with it, and everybody around him seems to be either trying to use him, or is convinced that if he just gets more material rewards he doesn't’ care about he will get better on his own.  Instead he just becomes more and more insecure and avoidant until the last two episodes which are about him finally learning to value himself, at least a little. What is interesting about Shinji is that just kinda wants to...merge with the world around him (if you like the Enneagrams, Shinji is the Platonic 9 btw).  I mean that line “unfamiliar ceiling”, Shinji hates change, he hates disruption, he hates messiness, and he hates activity, and that is basically what his life is now, what SHinji likes to do is just kinda zone out.  And Singularity is actually...kinda appealing to him, its merging, its becoming one with a larger group, and losing individuality, and Shinji has been trying to give up on his own individuality since before the show started.  So his learning to acknowledge himself as an individual is the pivotal part of his story. 

     Ok, that’s nice and all, but other than my assertion that Shinji is the best character in the show and the internet is wrong, what is the point?  Well Shinji has never been a power fantasy self insert character, in fact that I think that is why people hate him so much, they want to have the fun mecha show and Shinji is there being sad.  I mean the argument against Shinji is always “stop being EMO and just do something already, you are piloting a mech what reason do you have to be sad’ but the thing is, what the audience wants to fantasize about and what Shinji want are just..opposite.  The teenage male audience is like 

“Omg, it would be so awesome if i could be the chosen one who gets to fight the big monsters and everybody thinks i’m awesome, and I live in a house with two hot ladies who are weirdly into me and often walk around without clothes and everybody at school thinks i’m cool and then I win and become the hero of the world, all by beating the shit out of things in a giant mech, ITS AWESOME”

and Shinji is like

“....why would anybody want any of those things?  Now i’m just sad”

(Shinji doesn’t like Mecha Anime and neither should you) 

Shinji’s existence is actively fucking with the power fantasy of the mecha anime, because what the audience is suppose to like he is indifferent too, he never enjoys any of the things that make up the power fantasy.  And that’s partly because Shinji doesn’t enjoy anything, but he really isn’t a self insert power fantasy character because he is just such a fucking downer.  So while I appreciate giving the finger to Otaku culture (trust me I do), personifying the audience fan base in Shinji is just...wrong.  Because Shinji already is a rejection of the audience, everything they want he rejects in favor of sitting in his room staring at the ceiling.  If Ano wanted to make that point, Shinji isn’t the tool to use it for, because Shinji isn’t what they idealize.  

   Which leads to the larger problem cause....Well, Shinji from the show just...isn’t Shinji from the movie, they don’t behave that way at all.  True Shinji (show) is deeply flawed, but he would never masturbate over somebody, even if he had the desire, he would chicken out and do it at home.  And while Shinji is a deeply fucked up person who does have issues with women, he never displays that kind of entitlement and sense of ownership towards his friends that he does in the movie.  Shinji is deeply insecure about sex yes and he does check out the women around him, but his response to that is mostly shame and self loathing (his response to fucking everything), not a sense of ownership.  Honestly, if anything, they claim ownership over him, Asuka clearly has a crush on him (its mutual) and actively pressures him into kissing her (he fucks it up because of course he does) and despite being his guardian, Misato actively hits on Shinji like....a lot

(erm...what)

     Honestly, its really uncomfortable, when you watch this show as a teenage boy its like “oh the hot grown up how is COOL and confident and hip and drinks, and is confident about sex is into you, holy crap” but looking back, its kinda fucked up, I mean Misato is his boss and guardian and unlike with Asuka, Shinji doesn’t seem comfrotable with how much he hits on her.  He checks her out and fantasizes about her cause he is like 14, but the dynamic obviously makes him uncomfortable, he is attracted to her sexually but clearly the power dynamic is weird also why the fuck is she hitting on a 14 year old, she is like 28 i mean come on.  My point is, that in the show, while Shinji does have a weird relationship to the women in his life and really should question some of his sexist assumptions, he isn’t the type of larval form MRA as shown in the movie, that type of naked aggression towards women as a group just isn’t shown as part of his behavior.  I mean Shinji can (and does) do many awful thing, but having an object of affection who he feels so possessive of that he attempts to strangle her in order to vent his frustrations isn’t in his character.  I mean in terms of violating people’s boundries and showing lack of care for their feelings...in the show that is mostly happening to Shinji.  I mean Misako and Asuka really never take his feelings into account about anything and while he does the same to them (again show Shinji isn’t a good person) he just wants to go to his room, they keep aggressively making him uncomfortable.  And i’m not saying they are bad (well I am kinda saying that about Misato) just that this isn’t a dynamic or mindset Shinji displays, he isn’t an aggressive Otaku fanboy seeking a power tribe or sex, he is a deeply disturbed person who wants to hide in his room.  

Movie Shinji is effectively an entirely new character, or rather it is Shinji being written wrong, in essence its like if the character Shinji was possessed by the desires and insecurities of the fandom rather than his own, so he has all of his passivity and cowardice, but over entirely different issues.  The emotional climax of End of Eva is the women in his life actively calling him out for being an entitled selfish person who expects women to fix his problems and blames them for not being perfectly clear with him about their intentions, women existing to suit his needs. Asuka in particular makes a point about how Shinji doesn’t even care about her because of anything about her, he just wants to go after her because he feels he has a chance and is too afraid of rejection to go after anybody else.  He snaps once Asuka calls him a coward, which is a direct fuck you to the Otaku fandom, people who are obsessed with stories about heroism but are in fact cowards themselves.  

(cough)

     Meanwhile in the show, Shinji already knows he is a coward, in fact he knows it so deeply and it is so internalized that he basically doesn’t function, and the message he needs to take is “yes, you are a coward, but that isn’t an absolute term, that can change.  Anything about you can change if you recognize that you can change it.  And most importantly, even if you are a coward, you can still love yourself.”   I am not being original when I say these endings are exactly the opposite, because Shinji is a different character.  And while I am totally fine calling out Otaku culture because its a fucking dumpster fire, the point doesn’t actually work because Shinji isn’t the character you want to use to deliver that message.   Shinji isn’t that fandom, so having him be their mouthpiece means that it comes off as incoherent rather than righteous.  

   And also.....Otaku culture’s relationship to women is really fucked up but lets be honest here, the screwed up sexual politics of EVA isn’t just the fandom, Rei, Asuka, and Misato are all extremely sexualized from the word go by the series itself, and there is a TON of fanboy-ism within the original show.  The Fans aren’t making this shit up, they are taking it from the show itself.  So it comes off as kinda hypocritical to call them out, even if Ano is entirely correct to do so.

      End of Eva is just like the original show, it has some solid points but the entire show is too much of an incoherent mess to really pull them off, and the subtext of the movie (The toxic and obsessive nature of Otaku fan culture leads to selfishness, bitterness, and destroying the thing you love) has nothing to do with the text (Random christian imagery and giant robots being eaten).  But the show worked better because its subtext was largely consistent, everything else in the show might be a mess, but Shinji from start to finish is the exact same sad sack he has always been, and the resolution hinges on him....not doing that anymore.  There is a consistent thread in an otherwise inconsistent show, and that is Shinji, as fucking......I can’t even say.

     This is why End of Eva doesn’t work, it doesn’t have a core to wrap its point around, and so it has all the terrible thing the show has, without the one thread to redeem it.  Trust me, it is much better to hear End of Eva summarized then seen, while I honestly recommend the last two episodes of the show to anybody (not the rest of the show necessarily).  I mean Eva is a mess generally, but the show at least has something it wants to say, while the movie is mostly just vomiting..emotions.

    Actually legit, you know how Shinji builds up anger all day long and then kinda vomits it out at random points (9)?  Yeah, I kinda feel Ano is doing the same, End of Eva is basically a temper tantrum and he is breaking all of his toys, this is slightly excused because the people who pissed him off are literally the worse but still.........End of Eva is basically an emotional breakdown on film, which is interesting but not enjoyable.  

[typologycentral]

[Traditional Enneagram] Nice to meet you guys, care to help finding my Enneagram? :)

Hi guys, I'm Jacopo, 22, from Florence in Italy :) I recently discovered that I'm a INTP in MBTI system, but I'm still having troubles finding an enneagram that identify myself, if you wish to help I'd be glad :) Main Questions 1. What do you think your life is about? What drives you in life? This can be something like a goal or a purpose, or anything else that comes to mind. I would like to accomplish something good, that could leave a definite change in people close to me and, if possible, on the society. I care a lot about self expression and finding myself, so, I'd love to walk at the end of this life, knowing that I've done something that I loved and helped in some way others. I'm mostly driven by harmony, backed up with a bit of ambition and compromise, I'm quite indecisive on things because I constantly self-doubt myself, but I'd love to reach my objectives! I'm having troubles at University, law course, but, my main concern is managing in some way to get myself moving and finally reach the professions I'd love to do 2. What were you like as a kid? I was quite easygoing and peaceful, I always preferred to have relations with adults, but had pretty good times with my friend too! I was a lot more extraverted and expressive, than, in middle school I quite had a shock after the separation of my parents and ended up becoming more insecure (also, because at my school there were pretty terrible people that I simply couldn't manage to build a bridge witht them), in high school I was more open, still having troubles with classmates, but I had a group of friends that was pretty strong and united, so I knew I could have relied on them! Now, in my 20s I'm more easy-going,. pretty adaptable to every situation and have a tendency to make people comfortable and they open up with me, maybe because they feel listened to without being judged (at least, based on what others said :P) and, some people also told me I'm quite enthusiasthic and easily have a knack to "get" other people (I'm not very empathethic, but I have a tendency of relying on my instincts and usually receiving correct impressions on other people, and I learned to trust this sensations) 3. Describe your relationship with your parents. Does anything stand out about the way you interacted? The bond with my other is the strongest I have, since she raised me and we had to always count on each other, while with my father I just recently started to relate with and understand him, but I really don't respect him as a "man" in the strict sense, even if i love him anyway. With my mom we easily get each other, and she's the one I feel most comfrotable in being "assertive" and have constructive discussions, while with others I'm a lot more accomodating and usually act as a counselor for them (even if I think I really suck a it xD) 4. What values are important to you? What do you hope to avoid doing or being? For me (not in a particular order) Kindness, free speech, openness, exhcanging values and ideas, helpfulness, reliability, freedom, harmony, balance and adaptability; I want to make sure that others could count on me (whil I tend not to share very much of my internal struggles, preferring to give rather than receive, but I appreciate a lot when they do so) I fear the idea of being shamed or been seen as a critic heartless guy, with bad manners and a fiery temper. I try to keep self-control most of the time, but sometimes I burst very strongly and explosively :/ I also avoid at all costs to hurt others in any way 5. Aside from phobias, are there any fears that characterized your childhood? Have they continued into the present day, or not, and if not, how have you dealt with them? Not very much, aside the fact that I fear the idea of not being accepted or being harshly criticized or demonized; I lived as a cast out during middle school, I won't definitely end up in a similar situation since it was pretty disturbing... Also, I fear the idea of being bent and bossed around in the workplace, I could hardly stand a situation like that. 6. a.) How do you see yourself? I am quite easygoing, self-disciplined and peaceful, kinda zen in certain situations and try not to being swayed by panic in crisis. I'd like to think I have good intellectual capabilities, but always end up diminsihing them. I'm open, sociable and like to meet new people, while building a relationship is a complete different story. Aside my Ti dominance. I'm quite romatic at heart and I try (and hope) to be as helpful as possible to people close to me. I'm indecisive, not very assertive and definitely not imposing, even if I enjoy an intellectual discussion as long as I'm sure that the other won't be offended or take it badly, in that case I'd prefer to change topic or sometimes omitt my ideas... I try to look for compromises in different situations. b.) How do you want others to see you? I'd like, as I said, be seen as helpful and reliable, disciplined and a competent guy who could been given a job project and make others sure sure I'd make it. c.) What do you dislike the most in other people? Intolerance, close mindness, judgmental people who can't see a perspective different from theirs. I hate unpolitness and uncompromising non-cooperativity; I avoid as hell imposing people that boss around others and obstruct the possibility of expressing a free opinion... 7. Which habit do you most automatically act on? Rank the following habits from most to least automatic, on a scale of 1 (most) to 3 (least). a.)2. Work for personal gain with more concern for self than for others. I'd like to get wealth, but I wouldn't make it a priority over helping others or compromising b) 1. Strive for a sense of tranquility in yourself and the world around you Definitely, I look for a mental and spiritual fulfillment and always search for harmony 8. Where does the wandering mind take you? What provokes this? It switches between theories and knowledge I'm researching on (especially in pesonality typing, I like to have a mental archive of what others' types I think they are) to past experiences or , when I'm out, coming home and relaxing in a tranquil atmosphere. Mostly when I'm pretty tired or not interested in things I watch/listen to or that are explained to me :O 9. What makes you feel your best? What makes you feel your worst? The idea of tranquility, relax, cutting off my mind and just enjoy the peace of senses around me (I'd like to learn to meditate in beautiful surroundings); when I follow my many hobbies, dedicating my time to them; when I know that people that comes to me loooking for advices are feeling helped What makes me feel bad are strong, explosive and destructive discussions that could only harm a relationship or a strong bond; hypocrisy; indecisiveness and procrastination (two of my worst habits); feeling underappreciated or diminished 10. Let's talk about emotions. Explain what might make you feel the following, how they feel to you or how you react to the emotion: a.) anger I try to hide it, I just let it go wild with my family since I live with them, especially when my mentally illed grandma don't let my mother breathing since my mom is always stressed and has too many negative things going on lately... when pushed to the very limit I really bust out, but I mostly try to supress it, take a deep breath, and find common ground while having discussion (as I said, I'm totally incapacitated on imposing myself or assert others xD) Luckily I'm really patient on certain things, especially social and relationship issues ahah b.) shame I hate feeling ashamed, especially when put on the spot under the highlights and making terrible impressions. I'm improving this quite a bit, taking in it in a more zen and tranquil approach xD c.) anxiety I always try to focus on the bright side, pushing anxiety away, but it usally manifests itself when I self-doubt myself and end up in a grip of negative possibilities , but can snap out of it quite fast luckily :/ 11. Describe how you respond to the following: a.) stress I have a tendency to put it away, focusing more on being unfloating and self-disciplined, without giving to much attention to it; eventualy it end up accumulating and bursting out, giving me some anger explosions (and I usually feel bad afterwards) or just a constant feeling of sleepiness and dizziness D: b.) negative unexpected change I learned to accept it and usually try to make the best out of it, but, in the beginning, it could shake me up quite a bit c.) conflict Personally, I can be pretty assertive and obstinate in my ideas, but without being uncompromised and pushing on them; I'm pretty open, and look forward, for them to be confuted and discarded and usually have a tendency to "let them go"; with others people, I simply act by ignoring it or trying to mediate it in a peace-keeping act 12 a.) What kind of role are you naturally inclined to take in a group? Why? I switch between being quite enthusiatically and involve others, or simply being as a counselor that listens to others ramblings a lot, activating my troubleshooting mood to help them figure out a solution for themselves xD b.) If put in power, how do you behave? Why? I won't be good, definitely. I would probably end up being pushed around by others, or not imposing, trying to keep things going smoothly in an organized way and trying to find a good sistemation for everyone in the group. c.) Do you tend to struggle with others who have authority over you? Why? I'm quite obedient, even if skeptical because I want the respect to be earned and not given just because they have an authority position. I won't cause big commotions (even if I have revolutionary and rebelling ideas) because, especially at work, they could use their powers over me. 13. What do you see or notice in others that most people don't? Mostly motives and explanation of behaviours, but I won't take them for granted, even if I trust my hunches and intuitions a lot :P 14. Comment on your relationship with trust. I hardly give complete trust to someone, but, when I do, they have it until the very end, except if strongly betrayed in some way 15. Briefly: What religious and/or political beliefs do you have? Do you think they influenced your responses in this questionnaire? I have tendencies pretty close to Buddhism and oriental philosphy and religions, and, yes, since I studied them a bit I think they have biased my questionnaire :P On political, I'm mostly apolitic since I don't pick a side, just because that side is leftist or rightist, I prefer individual ideas and explanations, but I probably have some ideas pretty close to socialism-liberalism, but this preference efinitely didn't influence my questionnaire Optional Question (due to personal nature) Discuss an event that has impacted your life significantly; more importantly, how you responded to it. How I was acknwledged at my workplace, it definitely boosted my self-confidence and helped my insecurity issues, experience is the ebst teacher for me :P Extra Questions Which of the following temptations do you find yourself acting upon the most? (And briefly state why) To cyclically become indecisive and seek others for reassurance. I'm indecisive AF, and rely mostly on my family in help with it, and, yes, I keep asking close friend of mine for reassurance if I'm on the right path xD To overuse imagination in searching for yourself. Definitely, I love to understand and learn about things, and so I immediately apply them to me, feeling mostly biased on my hypothesis about my essence To avoid conflicts and asserting yourself. When pushed hard I become pretty obstinate and unyielding, but never, ever impose myself on others, I see it as some form of trampling and disrespect; I can sometimes become pretty stubborn and assertive in my positions in these situations, but I would definitely sacrifice assertiveness in favor of less fierce discussions What's something you are: a.) thankful you have b.) wish you could have? Why? I'm thankful to have people who believe in me and my capacities close to me, and also I'm really thankful I have a good deductive reasoning and dot connectings ability :D I wish I could been less indecisive, more fierce and determined without being detoured or changing my mind a lot, since it always make me procrastinate important things sorry for the long post and my English, it's not my mother language :) If you have more questions I'd love to answer to them Thanks a lot for the help and your patience *gives cookie for having the patience of reaching this point* Nice to meet you anyway guys!!!! JC http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/showthread.php?t=92809&goto=newpost&utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=tumblr

[dreamxng-forever]

(It deleted for some reason?) but @punk-rock-pixie asked me to answer all Unusual Asks so: Oh lordy Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Pandora is your room messy or clean? Generally it's kinda meh. I never put away my clothes so they're always in a pile on top of my stuffed animals what color are your eyes? A pretty chocolate brown or sometimes a dark hazel do you like your name? why? I mean yeah. Sarah is a pretty name and I don't see it being any different. Also it means princess in Hebrew so hell yeh what is your relationship status? Single and very lonely describe your personality in 3 words or less Seriously emotionally fun I guess what color hair do you have? It's dirty blonde what kind of car do you drive? color? I don't drive one but I'll have to drive a Jeep Cheeokke (the old square ones) and its white with a black hood where do you shop? Spectrum mostly how would you describe your style? My friend use to say fashionable. I don't know. Pretty disney-esk? favorite social media account Tumblr what size bed do you have? Twin any siblings? An older brother whom I miss because he's never home anymore if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? Does a fantasy world count? It probably doesn't so fuck. Um, honestly Disneyland. I would live in Disneyland. It's already like my second home and it holds such a special place in my heart favorite snapchat filter? The flower crown. I love flower crowns favorite makeup brand(s) You are asking someone who knows shit about makeup how many times a week do you shower? You know what no comment because recently I've been a lazy bum and don't shower as often as I need to. But typically I shower every other day favorite tv show? Fuck Grey's Anatomy or The Walking Dead shoe size? 9/10 how tall are you? 5 feet 7 inches sandals or sneakers? Typically sandals do you go to the gym? HA describe your dream date Disneyland with a bae who is just as passionate about the park as I am and we meet all the characters and introduce ourselves as each other's Prince/princess. Then a long time sitting around in Off the Page and just being together and snuggling while watching all the concept art and listening to all the songs and we talk about stuff if we feel up to it how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? About like $10 I think what color socks are you wearing? Invisible cause I am barefooted how many pillows do you sleep with? Two but I have many stuffed animals that I snuggle with do you have a job? what do you do? I don't, but I did work at Costume Castle in October and gonna do it again. I like being on the floor and helping customers and cleaning up the isles how many friends do you have? A have a few but honestly my main group of friends there's only 3 whats the worst thing you have ever done? Injured myself even though my friends and mom begged me not to whats your favorite candle scent? Strawberry 3 favorite boy names -Dorian -Jayden -Warren 3 favorite girl names -Aria -Alice -Mari favorite actor? That's very hard for me to choose favorite actress? Scarlet Johanson who is your celebrity crush? Tom Hiddleston favorite movie? Another can't choose. There's so many categories I put into my favorites, and even then there's severals in the category. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? Not really? I use too and my favorite series was the Spooks Apprentice. But now I mainly read comics. My favorite is the Fables series money or brains? Brains are pretty tasty. But so is money do you have a nickname? what is it? Sarah-Bear, m'sis, m'wife how many times have you been to the hospital? Twice but neither for myself. First time was when I visited grandpa during chemo and second was when mom had an appendectomy top 10 favorite songs Not in any specific order; -May I by Tranding Yesterday -Legendary by The Summer Set -Beside You by Marianas Trench -Good to You by Marianas Trench -Face Down by Red Jumpsuit -Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit -Training Wheels by Melanie Martinez -Dearly Departed by Marianas Trench -Follow You by Bring Me the Horizon -Let it Burn by Red do you take any medications daily? Nope what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) Fair what is your biggest fear? Death or loosing my friends how many kids do you want? 3 has always stuck with me whats your go to hair style? Ponytail what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) It's a small condo who is your role model? I don't even know anymore what was the last compliment you received? I don't really know. Hayden and Kacie compliment me all the time what was the last text you sent? I screamed about how I found out on of my favorite characters from Fables died to @alternative-mistakes how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? What do you mean Santa isn't real? what is your dream car? One that won't kill me opinion on smoking? Hate it but pictures of people smoking are really hot? do you go to college? I refuse to go to college honestly what is your dream job? Becoming a famous author would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? Suburbs do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? No do you have freckles? I wish I did. I love freckles do you smile for pictures? Not really. I hate my smile. I always try to hide my mouth how many pictures do you have on your phone? 14 because I can't keep photos since I have no storage have you ever peed in the woods? Yes and I almost pissed all over myself do you still watch cartoons? Of course do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? Wendy's Favorite dipping sauce? Ranch what do you wear to bed? Nightgown or a shirt and undies have you ever won a spelling bee? How does one spell what are your hobbies? Writing or playing video games can you draw? Not well do you play an instrument? I want to learn guitar what was the last concert you saw? Panic! At the Disco with Brittany tea or coffee? Neither Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Starbucks do you want to get married? Kinda. I don't know. I'll find out when I get there what is your crush’s first and last initial? P & P are you going to change your last name when you get married? Maybe. Probably. I hated the name 'Dye' for such a long time and wanted nothing more than to change it. Now I don't even know what color looks best on you? Purple in my opinion do you miss anyone right now? I miss Hayden and Britt and Kacie tbh. But there's two others who I miss so much more...I just want them back... do you sleep with your door open or closed? Closed do you believe in ghosts? Yes what is your biggest pet peeve? Walking really slow or stopping in the middle of the path last person you called` My mom favorite ice cream flavor? Wild and Reckless Sherbert regular oreos or golden oreos? Regular chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? Rainbow sprinkles what shirt are you wearing? It's a Beauty and the Beast nightgown what is your phone background? My lockscreen is Sora and Riku from Kingdom Hearts and my home screen is Peter Pan are you outgoing or shy? Fucking shy. Except at Disneyland I seem more outgoing do you like it when people play with your hair? Yes. Very much yes do you like your neighbors? I use too when @exclamation-point lived next to me. Now I don't even know my neighbors do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? I don't ever take care of my body have you ever been high? No have you ever been drunk? I want to be last thing you ate? Disneyland fudge favorite lyrics right now “Every masterpiece I'd write again You'll always be my porcelain I crossed my heart But I stuttered too So truth or dare Was I good to you Haven't had enough of you all to myself Still right beside you In sickness and health For ever after You will be my home And there's no place like home” summer or winter? Honestly neither. Spring. day or night? I feel more scared in the dark, but I like the dark more dark, milk, or white chocolate? Milk chocolate favorite month? April what is your zodiac sign Aries who was the last person you cried in front of? My mom I think. I had a very bad emotional breakdown because I felt like a burden to my friends. It was a very bad time but my mom wouldn't let me runaway so she comfroted me while I broke down