#it wont be a regular thing

[hachiibun]

Not snz, something of a personal vent, nothing urgent—

I don't really do stuff like this, so I don't know how to go about it. I hope it's alright if I just type stuff.

I feel lonely, or maybe isolated is a better way to describe it? It's like there's a barrier between me and everyone, including the people I care about. And I don't mean the physical barrier of me being all the way over here separated from people I love. It feels like there's a gap.

I can see people in the distance but as they reach for me or I reach for them, we find that we're too far apart. And the gap's only growing wider like I'm drifting further away.

I want to work on fixing that, forming new connections, learning about people, making friends, but that gap makes things difficult.

I've always struggled with feeling unwanted, that people don't really want to talk to me, hear about my interests, or just be around me in general. Like I'm just kept in friend circles because it'd be rude to cut me out with me not having done anything egregious enough to warrant it, but if I vanish it's not something anyone would mind.. It's something I'm sure isn't uncommon and it's definitely something I shouldn't be considering as a reality because I know I have people who care about me, but that's really what's been occupying my brain over the past few years.

Maybe it's all the pressure now mounting on me to earn enough money to fund my life, pay my rent and bills, buy food and such, but also come to terms with my past preparations no longer lining up with what I want to be doing with my life. I left my most recent job because it was chipping away at my health sure, but it's also so I could keep working on drawing and other things I want to do.

And for sure, I'm so happy to be able to draw things especially for people here and earn money from it, but with everything weighing on me, it gets hard to keep up the pace sometimes as much as I'd love to take comms at a quicker rate.

Maybe streaming my stuff again and getting to chat could be a good way to focus on drawing, but my problem with that is the timezone I'm in. A lot of people on here would probably not be able to catch streams unless I make big changes to my schedule. It'd feel all the more lonely.

And I know my current condition is the result of all my choices and I really do have to struggle if I want to live my life doing what Iove with the people I love, and really this all just boils down to "life's hard, I'm sad and lonely" but man...

Life's hard. I'm sad and lonely.

[ap0llx]

while I am breaking the seal on posting my actual face. I heard thru the grapevine that the yugioh fandom has been drawing yami yugi/atem with natural hair since long before I got here... thank u for your service. here is my contribution. (last photo taken by @stuck-in-a-surrealist-painting)

[redwitchrune]

had some time to think and watch people watch the minecraft movie trailer, and i think I've realized my main gripe with it. out of all the directions they could have chosen, why did they go with the one they did???

like. okay. i watched both phil and mumbo watch the trailer who had very different and opposite thoughts. i think mumbo was right in that it seems like it's trying to be an absurd, camp, and silly movie that makes fun of itself. the style (how ever mismatched) leans into that and the humor seems to go in that direction. and I think for what it's trying to be (camp, absurd, making fun of itself), it will probably be an okay movie! the focus won't be on minecraft, it will be on the minecraft world, if that makes sense. the look and mechanics over the feel and vibe.

on the other hand. i hate that they chose this direction. minecraft is such a game of stories, of the hidden stories, of what you make of the mysterious and wonderful world around you. you have the end poem. you have the music. you ha e the ruins. you have new expiernces and wonder and fear. yes it's a big world, but it also feels small. it's just you! in this abandoned and recovering world. and it loves you.

it just feels like that whole aspect of the game doesn't matter here. it's just the surface level appearance, mechanics, and look of the game. it honestly feels more like minecraft legends than normal minecraft, but even then it's missing the whimsy of legends.

yes it looks bad. yes it has like four different art styles. I think for what they're trying to do it will be Okay at best. but what it could've been. that's the real loss. It could've been about nostalgia. about love. about the universe. about making your own world with your own hands. about the quiet emptiness left behind you now have to live in. those raw experiences that won't be considered. whatever

[itscherryterry-again]

uh oh, i lured you into a false sense of security.

boo. homestuck nostalgia post!

[ch1zzie]

The original in the bottom

Plus the picture I mainly drew but decided to draw the rest for funny

[apuff]

my chemical tober :D

[c1trvswurld]

Saw a tt from a girl where she was venting and she said "Just because you laid up in bed with him, until the sun came up, talking all night kissing on each other, doesnt mean he likes you even in the slightes bit" and I think that's so yeehan coded

[morning-frost-daily]

Day 22

You're getting gay fanart today because it's all I've really got rn (and it turned out really good and I'm proud of it)

[nmoroder]

redrawing Those Pictures. you know. Them. under the assumption that Raiden hadn’t sliced them into bits (he hadn’t done that with Sam tho) and instead brought them to face justice or smth

[foccaccia]

one of the hardest things you can do, but one of the most rewarding, is understanding the fact that if one of your friends is annoyed with or mad at you, they will tell you. and if they are annoyed with or mad at you and they dont tell you, that burden is on them, not on you. catastrophizing in your head about how your harmless interactions might be enraging or disgusting a friend is damaging to you both. if someone respects you as a friend and as a person, they will tell you if they need a change. otherwise, its not your problem, baby. you are both individuals capable of communicating your needs, and neither of you (i am assuming) are telepaths.

[metukika]

ill say it before and ill say it again. hc that teru doesnt like serizawa at all.

[bvidzsoo]

Honestly, not having written yet Hongjoong and Wooyoung’s parts in my Greek God series was SO smart of me to wait because my holiday was in Greece and my memory is all refreshed of this gorgeous place and now I am even more inspired with the landscapes for their parts aaah🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

[rohirric-hunter]

The company that made my bike lock has chosen to combat picking attempts by shaping it in such a way that holding it the way you need to in order to pick it is very uncomfortable

This would be pretty clever except that it can be picked in 3 seconds flat because 2 out of the 4 digits of the combination are the default location of the wheels

[doomxdriven]

[Tired Bount noises]

[darabeatha]

/ Ju j j just u wait I learn perspective, it'll be OVER- my vision of m.octezuma and the ocelomeh riding all black cool fuckass futuristic motorcycles will be real just u wait just u wai t

[esaari]

merry crisis