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#it will slow down to 1/day soon
soylent-crocodile · 1 year
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Beastkeeper (Prestige Class)
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(art by BobKehl on deviantart)
(Do you like animal companions? I like animal companions. One of the things about fifth edition that most disappointed me when I found out about it was learning that attacking with your animal companion costs a druid her action. You mean I can't kick the action economy in the shins with my pet dinosaur? What gives?
This is a PrC for a character who wants to really focus on her companion. I especially gave the Deadly Weapons ability because about 60% of animal companions in Pathfinder are just straight up Bad (which, to be clear, is very typical of the system), and this was an attempt to even the scales.)
Role: Beastkeepers fight side by side with their animal companion, gaining increased combat prowess for themselves and their animal. They are still divine spellcasters, however, although they progress more slowly. Alignment: Beastkeepers can be any alignment Hit Die: d10
Prerequisites
Skills: Handle Animal 5 ranks Feats: Animal Affinity Other: Animal companion with effective druid level 2 or greater
Skills Beastkeepers gain 2+Int mod skill ranks per level Class skills are Climb (Str), Handle Animal (Cha), Knowledge (nature) (Int), Ride (Dex), and Swim (Str)
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Weapon and Armor Proficiencies
A beastkeeper gains proficiency with whips, light flails, and greatclubs.
Spells
Upon taking beastkeeper, a beastkeeper chooses one of the classes she has that grants divine spells. At the designated levels, she gains spells as though she had gained a level in that class. This only affects spells per day, spells known, and effective caster level. It does not affect other class abilities such as channel energy, domain abilities, or wild shape, although it does grant additional domain spell slots.
If a beastkeeper does not have a level in a class that grants divine spells, upon taking a level in a class that grants divine spells, she gains the benefit of this ability.
Companion Bond (Ex)
Levels in beastkeeper stack with levels that grant an animal companion for the purpose of determining the effective druid level for that companion.
Deadly Weapons (Ex)
A beastkeeper’s companion is especially powerful and dangerous for its kind. Upon taking the first level in beastkeeper or acquiring a new companion, a beastkeeper chooses one of the following for her companion;
A single unpaired natural attack’s damage dice becomes 1d10. The companion adds one and a half times his strength modifier damage with the attack.
A paired natural attack’s damage dice become 1d6 each.
Her companion gains a bonus animal feat.
Trained Handler (Ex)
A beastkeeper is an expert in dealing with animals. She adds her level in beastkeeper to her handle animal skill.
Weakening Fang (Su)
At level 2, a beastkeeper’s companion is able to resonate with its master’s actions and spells, making them a deadly team. Whenever a beastkeeper's animal companion deals damage to an opponent using his natural weapons, that opponent gains a -2 penalty to saves against spells cast by the beastkeeper for 1 minute. At level 6, this penalty becomes -3. This ability does not stack with itself.
Teamwork Feat
At levels 3 and 7 a beastkeeper chooses a teamwork feat she meets the prerequisites for. She and her animal companion gain that feat as a bonus feat, even if her animal companion does not meet the prerequisites.
Bonus Trick
At levels 4 and 8, a beastkeeper’s companion learns a bonus trick in addition to those gained by effective druid levels.
+2 Ability Bonus (Ex)
At levels 5 and 9, a beastkeeper’s companion becomes more capable. It gains a permanent +2 bonus to the ability score of the beastkeeper’s choice. This cannot raise an ability score over 22.
Combat Feat
At levels 5 and 9, a beastkeeper gains a bonus feat chosen from the combat feat list. Her animal companion does not gain that feat.
Pulse Fang (Su)
At level 10, the resonance between beastkeeper and companion grows stronger. The first time each round that a beastkeeper’s companion deals combat damage to a creature, the beastkeeper may, as an immediate action, make an attack against that creature or cast a spell that targets only that creature with a casting time of one standard action.
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ropes3amthoughts · 7 days
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Man I’ve been on my period forever. I just did the math and it’s been 17 days? Bruh. This sucks ass.
#Before anyone asks yes I contacted my gynecologist#Probably nobody will read this lmfao but like just in case#personal#tmi#uh maybe like cw warning gross idfk#I am oozing blood rn bro like it’s not even like I wake up and oh there’s blood it is flowing like a river right now#That’s probably so uncomfortable to imagine but like it’s so uncomfortable to feel!#I decided to look up when it started because I am really uncomfortable right now#I usually don’t bother keeping track of my periods because they’re always irregular#But like goddamn this sucksssss#it’s not even like cramping or anything it just feels really weird#I mean my back hurts a little bit but it’s not like cramping#It’s hot down there the blood is hot#blergh#Can it stop bruh 😭😭😭#I am suffering dawg#this is probably so gross and awkward to read but like I needed to rant somewhere lmao this is gross and awkward for me to be experiencing 💔#17 days of bleeding and the blood isn’t even slowing down like it’s going to end soon it is flowing like it’s day 1#bro imagine my period like ended and then started immediately after or something#this is a bunch of bullshit bruh#fml#Also this probably happened because I’m trying to take birth control because my periods suck lmao#like I would always get sick and throw up when I’d start my period so I started birth control but I got like a new one like the arm one#I used to be on Depo but then I’d have to do the shot every couple of months and it made me gain like ten pounds lmao#oh ok I just googled nexplanon long period and someone on Reddit had a period for 18 days so this feels more normal now but it still sucks#hope it goes away soon#man I am spilling my whole heart out to Tumblr rn this is lowkey awkward I’m being vulnerable af with my thoughts#eh whatever who cares I’ll just post this#rope/spider post
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coloursofaparadox · 3 months
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i finally got my adhd med dosage worked out and also for like the first time since upping the dosage actually managed to take it consistently long enough for it to actually kick in over the last few weeks and god damn. that shit is magic.
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curryshesus · 3 months
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jeon jungkook fics that had me going feral
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hi guys, here's a part 2 to my favorite jjk fics on tumblr! note that many of these fics contain 18+ content. you are responsible for the content you consume! as always, if you enjoyed any of these fics as much as i did, please take a moment to send some love to the authors! part 1 | other bts members
➺ cold nights & blurred lines - by @awrkive
summary: jungkook and you have been in a sexual relationship with each other for four months now, and it’s casual for the most part. but as time passes, you can’t help but feel that some of the lines suddenly got blurred in the process. is it a cliché to blur the lines with your fuck buddy? it definitely is. will you do something about it? both of your emotional constipation have a hard time saying yes.
➺ night crawlers - by @alphabetboyluvr
summary: jungkook’s always been good at running. track, field, red lights, shit outta luck. drugs, now, too. but he doesn’t expect to run into you. in your shared lecture halls, sure. maybe. but not down the back alleys of daerim at ass o’clock in the morning. there are only three types of women he ever sees in daerim: hookers, sugar-babies and addicts. you aren't any of those; you're a trust-fund baby who can get percocet on private repeat prescription, if you really want it. he's sure of it. so it then further begs the question: why the fuck are you here?
➺ this is how you fall in love - by @jeonqkooks
summary: after years of drinking and clubbing most days of the week and leaving every gig with a different girl on his arm, jungkook feels what it’s like to want someone with his entire being.
➺ the dilf installments - by @mercurygguk
summary: this series follows jungkook’s life as a divorced father. but wait, how exactly does one balance being a father, a boyfriend, a friend, and a respectable boss at the same time? read the installments below to find out!
➺ ultimatum - by @parkmuse
summary: your pervy, idiotic boyfriend just so happens to also be your friendly neighborhood Spider-man (in bed).
➺ a hero's journey - by @hansolmates
summary: jungkook and jisoo are the mightiest power couple. however, one drunken confession and that whole facade fades in an instant. you realize that maybe you need to break from your unvaried life for a bit and be the hero of your own love story
➺ tempest - by @kooktrash
summary: you’ve always considered your life to be more mundane than you would like to admit. it was a constant cycle of the same things over and over again that when you meet jeon jungkook at a bar, of all places, you didn’t expect to see just how much he would change your life and those around you. he’s got an air of mystery around him with his charming good looks and a violent past that you slowly begun to unravel when it feels like everything is going perfect.
➺ by its cover - by @gimmesumsuga
summary: the one where Jungkook makes a horrifically bad first impression.
➺ slow dancing - by @yoonia
summary: when your countdown appeared on your wrist right in the morning of your eighteenth birthday, you had thought that perhaps the universe was on your side, especially since the final seconds were already ticking so soon. You just never expected to have your first meeting with your soulmate to be the day when you had to let him go. But hope was not lost when you still found love without the bond, and Jungkook showed you that it was possible to find happiness beyond the system that was written for you. Except that the universe doesn’t seem to have enough of its game, when your past sacrifice comes back hitting you straight in the face, just when you had believed that you had written off the perfect ending to your bittersweet tale.
➺ e s p r e s s o - by @joonberriess
➺ hold me closer - by @ahundredtimesover
summary: when you're asked to look after your parents' house and meet them before they go on vacation, you, Jimin, and Jungkook take the trip to your hometown of Busan and relive memories of your youth. While your new relationship has you feeling like a lovesick teenager with all the affection that Jungkook shows you, you're still you - a professional trying to make it in the corporate world, and an eldest child trying not to disappoint her parents. And that turns out to be your undoing, as a little blunder causes a rift between you and Jungkook, resulting in a trip that you might as well have messed up… Not if your brother can help it, though.
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screampied · 5 months
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✩ here’s the second masterlist! — this features published works from early may ‘24 up to now. 18+ only. for my old works, here’s the first masterlist.
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ೀ⋆ MULTI HEADCANONS.
don’t be shy hit it raw.
cartwheel on the dick.
you say it’s big but you take it.
runnin from it.
fakin' it for you.
slow it down make it bouncy.
she wanna go viral.
she’s a very kinky girl.
call me by your name.
match my freak.
hit it like it’s all mine.
all on my tongue i want it.
hit or miss.
you get me so soaked.
big ‘ole freak.
this ain’t fiction, baby! (it kinda is..)
sweetest (cream)pie.
checked the rack.
i can make that p*ssy rain often.
c*m right on me, i mean camaraderie.
like this p*ssy designed for ya.
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ೀ⋆ ONESHOTS/FICS.
💭 SATORU GOJO.
candy boy: who would have thought that the #1 camboy in your city was no one other than your virgin roommate gojo, who’s totally putting on a show for his fangirls. he talks too much, but maybe you can shut his mouth and put his sweetened little fantasies to reality.
government hooker: what happens when you’re the popstar too? even better question: what happens when you show up to a show with no panties thanks to your band mates gojo and geto?
hell on heels: it's your third day on the job as a flight attendant. you work around a lot of snobby rich elites, but a particular one catches your eye. a particular one who tips you $300 dollars in cash and wants way more than just your uninvited attention.
if i was a rich girl: not only do you get your panties back but you get a handsome, suave sugar daddy as a gift. gojo takes you out on a date but the lavish, exquisite food isn’t what he’s exactly hungry for. hint: it’s between your legs. oh, and you.
hollaback girl: you wanna be his favorite girl—but you also wanna be his favorite brat. satoru’s caught off guard when you decide to play with him while he’s in a meeting. not only do you make him pissed but you make him whine.
bubble pop electric: it’s your birthday and your sugar daddy takes you on a spree to the mall. perhaps buying a new set of panties with his initials engraved on it to tease him wasn’t the brightest idea. get in loser, you’re going shopping.
bon appétit baby: stupid ovulation week is approaching soon and out of nowhere, you get baby fever. you ask your sugar daddy for help but his version of ‘help’ is trying to get you pregnant.
harleys in hawaii: it’s been almost a year with your sugar daddy and as a candied sweet surprise, he takes you on his private yacht. although—the thing that’s even sweeter is the ‘love’ chocolates you both try just for fun. after all, satoru’s always had a sweet tooth.
💭 FUSHIGURO TOJI.
ghostin: it's midnight and you're bored. bored and horny. everyone knows ghosts aren't real, or are they? you end up summoning a ghost and he's not leaving anytime soon, in fact, he wants to give you a taste of your own medicine for disrupting his slumber. you get a taste, alright.
ridin' dirty: you never realized how hot your local mechanic was until he had you arched and bent over your hood. spoiler fucking alert, you end up getting a different kind of pipe that’s of course free of charge just for you.
mama i’m in love with two criminals: you had one job. interrogate two felonious criminals, not screw them both. but it’s a friday night and what happens in the interrogation room stays in the interrogation room, right? wrong.
finish inside her: what the hell is a full nelson? no worries, luckily underground boxer toji shows you a hands-on demonstration. although, you want choso to try it with you too. not only are you a slut visual learner, but you also think you can take them both - not in a fight though.
never wanna lose me: for the hell of it, you let your roommate toji hit just once and he’s never been the same. what starts as a usual lazy smoke sesh turns into him wanting more than just to get high—he wants you.
bed chem: being sandwiched between two of your co-stars during a séx scene sounds like a fever dream. the real fever dream is finding out who you have better bed chemistry with. the sweet blond who always talks you through it or the smug dark haired one who’s constantly stealing your panties.
pheromoaned: after three long years in the slammer, toji returns home to you—his pretty sweet fiancé. to surprise him, you decided to spray on your new expensive pheromone perfume. was it the best idea? probably not. you wanted to tease him, not make him feral.
💭 NANAMIN KENTO.
i just wanna hear you s(c)cream: what’s your favorite scary movie? is it carrie? psycho? or maybe nightmare on elm street? perhaps picking up the phone was a bad idea, but you don’t scare easily! or do you?
million dolla baby: nanami gets dragged to a nearby strip club by his colleague gojo. he insists it’ll help him stop being so pent up and tense from work. there, he meets you—and for some reason, he just can’t keep his hands off your body. perhaps nanami wanted a bit more than just a dance though.
bed chem: being sandwiched between two of your co-stars during a séx scene sounds like a fever dream. the real fever dream is finding out who you have better bed chemistry with. the sweet blond who always talks you through it or the smug dark haired one who’s constantly stealing your panties.
💭 CHOSO KAMO.
finish inside her: what the hell is a full nelson? no worries, luckily underground boxer toji shows you a hands-on demonstration. although, you want choso to try it with you too. not only are you a slut visual learner, but you also think you can take them both - not in a fight though.
💭 SUKUNA RYŌMEN.
mama i’m in love with two criminals: you had one job. interrogate two felonious criminals, not screw them both. but it’s a friday night and what happens in the interrogation room stays in the interrogation room, right? wrong.
save a horse milk a demon: who would’ve known the king of curses can lactate? not you and certainly not him. this is dire, he needs help but more importantly - he needs you.
💭 SUGURU GETO.
i just wanna hear you s(c)ream: what’s your favorite scary movie? is it carrie? psycho? or maybe nightmare on elm street? perhaps picking up the phone was a bad idea, but you don’t scare easily! or do you?
government hooker: what happens when you’re the popstar too? even better question: what happens when you show up to a show with no panties thanks to your band mates gojo and geto?
#oohmami: cuban link, diamond cross—you’re a big fan of suguru geto, the top street racer in tokyo. he doesn’t wanna win any more races, he wants to win you this time. keep at it and he might have to fuck you on the highway.
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ೀ⋆ THIRSTS.
💭 SATORU GOJO.
easy access.
want a taste.
he’s confident.
spoiled.
💭 FUSHIGURO TOJI.
good boy.
baby makin.
marry the p*ssy.
one bite.
firefighter!toji
ride it good.
💭 NANAMIN KENTO.
take a seat.
patience.
caught in the act.
marry me again.
get it wet for me.
marry me.
slipped out.
little kinky.
teach me.
💭 CHOSO KAMO.
full nelson.
sensitive.
so big.
p whipped.
💭 SUKUNA RYŌMEN.
baby makin.
king of whining.
messy eater.
more than two.
let them know.
touch me.
on that throne.
💭 SUGURU GETO.
keep quiet.
big girl.
💭 SHOKO IEIRI.
bumpy ride.
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© 2023-2024 SCREAMPIED. please do not copy, modify, or translate my work. all rights are rightfully reserved to me.
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zombvibes · 1 year
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so umm……send asks maybe before i lose my mind maybe????? (by lose my mind i mean my brain will leak out of my ears)
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a-plague-in-time · 1 year
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sorry my 1 follower..aslo the mystery of tumblr capitalizing that 1 tag
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matsunoluvr · 1 month
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୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ when the love and deepspace boys get jealous
warnings: pouty men, jealous xavier is a warning in itself, sorry if i mischaracterise…. and i also have favourites LOLL
characters: sylus, zayne, rafayel, xavier
link to master list here!
author notes: all i can think of is pouty rafayel and jealous xavier my brain is a melted goop of lnds brainrot… also sorry for not posting in a while i was on holiday!!
also quick reminder that i have requests open but 1. i’ll get to them slowly and 2. please read my pinned post about rules!
more under the cut ~
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out of the four men i think sylus is the least jealous - now let me elaborate that possessiveness and jealousy (in my eyes) are very different
if you talk to another man, sylus both trusts you and has enough faith in himself to know that no matter what the dude does, sylus is yours and you’re his
he trusts you 100%, without a shadow of a doubt. and this translates through his lack of jealousy when you spend time with other people
however, if the man even attempts to lay a finger on you, his tone becomes too sweet or his hand inches a bit too close and you’re getting uncomfortable?
you bet your ass sylus is interfering.
immediately shifts his body to create distance between you and the other party
he flashes a dangerous look at the other man, evol glowing dangerously as it whispers a small warning into the other’s ear
“Stay away and you get to stay alive.”
he seriously doesn't fuck around when it comes to your comfort and safety, and if he feels that another man is compromising it or pushing the boundaries it really ticks him off
when does sylus get jealous?
mostly when you start to spend less time with him and more time with others
it’s not as if as soon as you spend time with someone else he gets jealous, but if it causes you to start to ignore him/spend less time with him he gets jealous
when he gets jealous, he doesn’t hide it at all
sylus isn’t one to keep his feelings from you, so when you see his displeasured frown you know immediately something is up
he doesn’t get angry or petty when jealous, he just makes it clear that he’s not happy with the division of attention
when you ask him what’s up, he gives you the answer plain and simple
“Getting bored of me already? How come you’re spending more time with […] than me, I’m jealous.”
his voice is slow and clearly unimpressed, crossing his arms as he looks you up and down.
luckily for you, he’s not hard to win over
spend time with him, even if it’s not active such as going out to restaurants or to one of his formal events
the two of you sitting in comfortable silence, him reading a magazine and you looking through moments, that’s more than enough for him
he’s not opposed to displays of physical affection either, cuddling or kisses to his face - anything that tells him “you’re mine/i’m yours” will satisfy him
just make sure not to spend TOO much time with the other person, otherwise sylus might seriously hunt them down
he’d never make you jealous on purpose, he had no interest in other women/men at all and respects you way too much to pull petty moves like that
when sylus accidentally makes you jealous, he’ll definitely pamper you, spoil you with gifts and spend time with you
wanted to get the new limited edition plushie? he’ll stay in the arcade with you until you get all of them. wanted a new game on steam? he’s bought both the game, all the dlcs and any in game passes and currency.
Somewhere at some point during the day he'll simply come clean about it, after all he's a straight forward man and he trusts you.
"I'm sorry sweetie, I didn't mean to make you jealous. Forgive me, please?"
tldr; sylus is a love sick loser that knows you’re equally in love with him as he is with you
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here goes the award to the most composed LI - zayne gets jealous alright, not nearly as much as the coming two but he still gets jealous
it's not that he doesn't trust you, but watching you smile so brightly to the café employee or get a little too friendly with another doctor sets him on edge
if you're talking to male friends/giving them friendly hugs zayne's completely fine with it, he's happy to see you surrounded by people who care for you and for you to be happy too
at first it's hard to tell when zayne gets jealous, he has a poker face that would put lady gaga to shame
however, after a while you discover the few subtleties that give away his disgruntled state
for example, if you're talking a bit too excitedly or friendly to the barista - especially one you'd both met just today - there'd be a little crease in his forehead, his mouthwould be a fraction more downturned and his eyes a bit narrower as if he was squinting
or if you talk to him about a male colleague when you two were supposed to be out on a date, he'd definitely be jealous... however the only give away would be the faintest purse of his lips and twitch of his eyebrow
if you ask him if he's jealous he's going to deny it, he usually doesn't lie but when it comes to vulnerable emotions such as jealousy i feel he'd have difficulties expressing them
"Jealous? I'm not jealous, don't worry about me."
but then the right side of his mouth is twitching a little and if you focus hard enough he gives the impression of a kicked puppy, a very subtle hint of 'give me attention'
if you manage to learn the art of 'zayne expression reading' and finally notice that he's not 'lactose-intolerant-and-having-stomach-issues-causing-him-to-look-like-that' but in fact jealous, here's a few ways to heal your zayne!!
zayne specialists recommend a good dosage of subtle affections - e.g. bringing up one of his interests or reminiscing upon something you two did in the past, basically indicating to him 'hey, i still love you most in the world!'
he's a perceptive man and will pick up on what you're doing relatively quick, and his little grumpy face will relax back into the unconscious, soft smile he adopts when in your presence
if he accidentally makes you jealous, he makes sure you know more than anyone else in the world that he's yours and yours only.
reciprocates the small gestures such as holding your hand in public or introducing you to his colleagues
"Good afternoon to you too. I believe you haven't met [Y/N] before?"
and then he'll adjust his hand placement, sliding from patting your shoulder to gentle resting on the small of your back, a little intimate gesture that screams "I'm their partner."
makes sure by the end of the day he's got the message across, and at one point brings it up (even though you've basically forgotten what he did to make you jealous anyways)
"I didn't mean to upset you, [Y/N]. I love you only, no one else could replace you, I promise."
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okay, yeah, we made it to jealous, pouty, bratty man territory
there’s an evident gap between zayne level jealousy and rafayel level jealousy
don’t get me wrong, rafayel would do anything you asked of him - partially because of his whole lumerian bond and also because he’s utterly whipped for you
does he love you? that’s a stupid question to ask oh course he does… but does he truly trust you?
i’d like to think that rafayel (if he was dating you in this situation) is absolutely devoted to you and trusts you wholeheartedly, but in reality rafayel has deep engraved fears and uncertainties
he has a fear of being forgotten about, and likely (as a consequence of being forgotten multiple times) - the idea of being abandoned or replaced sends physical chills down his spine
so honestly, rafayel’s jealousy stems from the unwavering fear of being left alone, lost and forgotten again…
the pain of being forgotten, it’s not something he’s willing to go through any more, causing it to be difficult to fully reassure him that you’re his.
on a more lighter, more playful level, rafayel’s jealousy would probably lay with animals - specifically cats and sea creatures
one day he finds that instead of lazing about with him indoors, that you were outside napping with a cat on your lap
if he wasn’t so afraid of the cat concerned for your quality and length of sleep he would’ve had a go at the cat as it smirked triumphantly at him, licking its paws as it rolls around in your lap.
when complaining later on he would be his usual, petulant self, pouting and crossing his arms, tilting his chin up etc
“I guess you prefer those furry monsters over a fishie like me, why don’t you just leave me for one?”
to fix this petty brattiness is simple!
simply devote all your attention and affections to rafayel, as in when you two are alone and spending time together you can just pat his head or trace his beauty marks
he’ll be pouting the whole time, but after a few pats he’ll get embarrassed and his ears will go red as he says something like “I’m not a cat…” yet he still lets you pet him lol
rafayel especially likes it when you gently stroke at the roots of his hair, leaning into your touch a little every time you thread deeper into his hair
however, if you spend too much time with another man rather than rafayel, it’s a whole different type of jealousy/insecurity
he’s quiet, too quiet, and withdrawn
the situation was deeply confusing the first time around
it’s as if you ordered the wrong rafayel, what happened to his usual bratty and playful personality? this wasn’t like all the other times.
unlike his childish display of jealousy when you were with the cat, this time he had a schooled expression, blank, a facade
his expression was eerie, you’d never seen him like this, so… emotionless seeming
rafayel, really, was emotionally detaching from the relationship - he still loves you oh my god he adores you so much he’d sacrifice everything he had for you, but the idea of you preferring that other person over him?
it sends him into panic, and all he (believed he) could do was numb himself, anticipate the leave or him getting forgotten
(am i projecting too much here… avoidant attachment rafayel believer and lover 😞🙏)
if he withdrew from the relationship first, maybe it would hurt less being left again
of course you weren’t intending to leave him, so how do you fix this?
well, as unhealthy as this may seem, spending less time with the new person and more time with rafayel really would be the only way i could think of making him feel better
saying things such as “Rafayel I would never leave you.” can only provide him with short-term reassurance, after all how many times have you said that before and then still proceeded to leave him?
instead, caress him gently, give him time to feel safe in the relationship again. late night calls where you two fall asleep together or hold him in your arms as you two both sleep at night
this avoidant attachment style will, however, probably go when you two start dating, since in dating you rafayel has probably decided to let you into his heart and whole heartedly trusts you now :)
if rafayel accidentally makes you jealous, depending on the severity (again) here’s what he’d do
if it was a simple thing (such as spending too much time with the shakes idk something more tame) he’d definitely tease you
“Awwh cutie? Getting jealous of the sharks? Don’t worry, I prefer you over them any day.”
he’ll have this smug ass grin that pisses you off, as much as it makes you love him too
rafayel will give you more hugs and gifts than usual for a while after, claiming it’s ‘nothing’ and that you’re ’hallucinating things’ when you ask what he’s doing
really he’s apologising, but you don’t need to know that
if he made you really jealous/upset he’ll make is extremely clear to you that he belongs to you, his heart and will is yours
will become more clingy and affectionate with you (not that he does it on purpose infact he’s only showing his true desires more), forever. like, you get jealous? don’t worry, literally for the rest of your life you’ll know that rafayel is head-over-heels for you.
tldr: he needs a hug :( also i ended up writing way more than intended but im a rafayel lover, writer and if he has no stans left im dead
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here he is, the most jealous and arguably possessive man in lnd.
xavier tries to hide it, but everyone knows that he’s yours, without a shadow of a doubt
we all saw what happened with jeremiah, don’t make me pull out the receipts LOL. like jeremiah was just happy to finally see the girl xavier was lining over for centuries and xavier was already losing his shit 😭
literally anyone talking to you too affectionately will tick him off, but xavier’s too sly to make it obvious
you’re talking to a doctor (cough zayne) ? xavier brings up some sort of old medicine they don’t or asks about their speciality so you stop talking to them
talking to a protocore specialist? he’ll all of a sudden be holding a textbook worthy protocore, worth the poor persons whole shop
a florist? he’s pointing at every flower and naming them, both common and scientific name.
“Oh [Y/N], look at that flower. I believe it’s called a Lonicera periclymenum?”
*turns to face the clearly shocked and flustered florist with a polite smile*
“Well, maybe you know it as a honeysuckle, is that correct?”
after living for so long he’s learnt many things, and boy does he use it to his advantage
when xavier gets jealous, he doesn’t expect anything from you, no no, this man is a service boyfriend if i’ve ever seen one, he was MADE to please you
rather than thinking “oh you don’t like me anymore i’m so upset“ he thinks “i need to serve and show you i’m yours.”
do you like sweet things? he’s buying you chocolates of all kinds, if that’s not your jam he’s got pastries, or candy, or fresh fruit, maybe everything in a little gift box
prefer savoury foods? he’ll cook you a meal that he knows you like (even if you don’t trust the food) he’ll practice making it until you like it
if you talk about another person when you’re one on one with him, he’ll do little things to get your attention, maybe bite your finger softly or tuck hair behind your ear, little fleeting touches and such
cheeky little grins and conversational diversions such as 'Oh? What about you, how did you do in the exam?' or 'What were you buying in the supermarket?' - more ways of saying "i'm yours, don't forget"
but if you wanted to reassure xavier, physical affections such as cuddling and kisses can win him over
nap with him for a few nights (really he forgave you the first night, he just pretended to be grumpy with you for a while longer for more naps) and he’ll be satisfied (for now)
“Come cuddle with me starlight, I’ve still not forgiven you.”
(he’s lying, he forgave you like a week ago)
likes it when you play with his hair when you two cuddle - now this makes me want to write abt how the men cuddle lol
if he accidentally makes you jealous it’d probably be when the two of you are on a mission and he flirts with another woman to easily progress through a mission
the two of you are in the hotel room and you’re sulking in the bed, turning away from him and clearly displeased
xavier knows you’re jealous, and can only huff out an amused breath - he doesn’t like that you’re feeling bad but he’s happy that you’re jealous… means you like him as much as he likes you!
he gently walks over to the bed, shifting onto the duvet beside you and reaches out to touch your shoulder - making sure you’re okay with him touching you
if you let him, he’ll lie down next to you and slowly wrap his arms around you, spooning you from behind as he slowly kisses the top of your head
slipping your shirt down to just below your shoulder, he gives the skin of your back gentle kisses as he apologises
“I’m sorry, it was for the mission. I’ve only ever loved you, so please don’t be angry.”
and then he nuzzled into your back until you finally cave in, twisting around and hugging him back.
he’ll be seriously apologetic about it though, and in the future avoid such intimate forms of gathering information even *if* you told him it was okay
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AN; i got way too carried away with rafayel ANYWAYS hope you enjoy and now i want to write smaller hcs on how the men cuddle lolol
also this isn’t proofread no beta we die like caleb ig
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jaewritesfic · 1 month
Text
Everlasting Trio Nobody Knows AU DP x DC Part 4
Part 3
(Tim POV! This is a long one 😅)
 Tim almost has it. He's so close to cracking this file he can fucking taste it. He's been fighting this thing for two weeks. It's the most incomprehensible and infuriating code he's ever faced off against, which is fitting considering who gave it to them.
The engineer. THEIR engineer. The engineer they didn't ask for and Tim still isn't sure how they got, and the single biggest mystery in Tim's fucking life right now.
See, a significant amount of Bat gadgets at this point are Tim's brainchildren. He imagines them, he designs them, he workshops and tests them.
A few months ago, he'd had a pouch on his utility belt full of experimental pellets meant for slowing down fleeing vehicles. They were designed to break when run over and the compound inside would expand into durable, sticky foam that would ensnare tires.
He'd tested them in the cave.
He had not been prepared to take one hit to that side and have to frantically divest himself of that pouch before he became Gotham's latest foam based cryptid. 
His family had laughed themselves silly at him even as he broke off in pursuit of the drug runners he'd been fighting.
When Tim had doubled back expecting a mess to clean up and pellets to rework? It had been gone. All of it. The foam, the pellets, the pouch of his utility belt.
A serious problem, because who knows who got their hands on that?
Then it had shown back up.
That is to say, Gordon had called them because he found a pouch with a note labeled ‘for Red Robin’ sitting on the stand of the Bat Signal and didn't dare touch it.
After making sure it wasn't a bomb or some kind of biological weapon, Tim had opened the pouch - his own belt pouch - and found pellets. New pellets. Different pellets.
The note just read, “As funny as that was to watch, I fixed them for you. No more premature sploogage on the job. :3 P.S. here's a recipe for solution to dissolve future intentional discharges.”
They'd been right, too. The new pellets were tested (in case THEY were a bomb or biological weapon) and they'd been just strong enough to safely transport but still break when under the pressure of tires. Even the foam was more effective, and the spray Tim synthesized from that stupid recipe had worked like a dream.
What. The fuck.
This person not only improved his design and came up with a dissolution agent from scratch in days, they'd been watching without him knowing and made off with the original pellets without anyone noticing.
This was either a rogue in the making or someone they wanted on their side, and either way they needed to be found.
So Tim had done the obvious.
He'd put together a lockbox of money for the product they'd been given, loaded it with no less than ten (10) bat trackers and a note thanking their mysterious benefactor and requesting to meet up. He'd exploded a foam pellet on a rooftop and left the box on it in the hopes they'd notice and find it, then hung around far enough to not be seen and close enough to beat feet as soon as the trackers started moving. 
They did not start moving. They all went offline simultaneously. 
Tim has never moved so fast in his life, and yet by the time he got to the rooftop there was a pile of foam and nothing else. Not even a trace of whoever took the lockbox.
The next day, there was a ping of one (1) tracker that led them to a note thanking him for the money, refusing to meet, and asking if they'd considered certain improvements to their grapples with schematics for said designs.
Thus started the most bizarre and infuriating chase through notes, money, helpful designs and disappearing trackers Tim has ever been a part of.
Last time, the engineer had left them a USB stick and a note claiming that since they really wanted to know about him so bad, they could have the information on the USB if they could crack the encryption on the zip file inside.
Obviously they screened heavily for viruses or backdoors, but long story short Tim has been trying to crack the fucking thing for two weeks and refuses to let Oracle help. It's personal. It's a matter of pride. 
He could swear the code itself has actively been sabotaging his attempts to hack it, which is, you know. Impossible. 
Ping!
Tim blinks, looking over at the map on another monitor of the Bat computer. 
“Motherfucker-”
He taps into Duke’s comms. This is the first time this has ever happened during the day shift, he wasn't expecting it.
“Signal! I need you on the roof of the warehouse on the corner of Fifth and Everest - a tracker just came online.”
Another thing that infuriates Tim. You can't just turn Bat trackers on and off. They're activated, and then they either stay active or they're destroyed. They can't be turned off and then reactivated.
And fucking yet.
Duke groans, but his own tracker starts making its way in that direction.
“Dude. He's gonna be long gone by the time I get there. He always is.”
“He can't run from me forever,” Tim insists. “I'm almost in this damn file, and I am going to find him and dangle him off a roof from his ankles for giving us this runaround, so help me God.”
“Uh huh,” Duke deadpans. “Sure you are. I'm almost there, and- oh look! A note. What a surprise!”
Tim hears Duke touch down on the rooftop, eyes on the code on his screen while his brother clears his throat and reads aloud.
“Ahem- ‘Good morning, sunshine!’ - guess that's me - ‘I hear some bats and birds have been murdering tires at an alarming rate with the way they drive their bikes-’”
Tim freezes. He's not listening anymore.
“Signal.”
“‘- and that just can't be good for business. Nobody wants a bald tire ruining a chase. So boy do I have the thing for you-”
“Signal!”
“What?”
“I got it.”
“Huh? Got what?”
“I cracked his file. I got it.”
Tim is staring, wide eyed and full of a mixture of elation and trepidation at the contents of the zip file. It's a single text file titled, ‘Wow! You did it!’
“Oh, shit? Well? What's in it?”
Tim swallows, mouse hovering over the file. He takes a deep breath, then double clicks.
The file opens.
Tim blinks.
“Red Robin? What's in it?”
Tim scrolls slowly down, disbelief and horror dawning across his face. “Oh my God.”
“What? Come on, man, talk to me.”
Tim scrolls further.
“Oh. My God.”
“Red? Red Robin, you're scaring me, man.”
Tim puts his face in his hands. Voice muffled, he responds.
“Duke.”
“...Red? You okay?”
“No.”
“No?”
“It's the entire Bee Movie script.”
Silence reigns for a solid five seconds before Duke breaks and descends into raucous, hysterical laughter.
Even muffled by his own hands, Tim's scream of rage scares the bats in the cave into a tizzy.
Part 5
Masterpost
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rememberwren · 2 months
Text
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Easy peasy premature ejaculation squeezy. Hypersexual!Simon/fem!reader, handjobs, premature ejaculation.
-
Ghost works his boxers back up his thick thighs and disappears into the en-suite bathroom in just them and his t-shirt. You definitely don’t check him out as he leaves. When he comes back, he has wiped his abs clean and holds an extra one in his hands. He has trouble meeting your eyes, but when he does, he gives a little self-deprecating smile that looks more like a wince. 
He’s still hard. 
“Is it always like this?” you ask. 
“Pretty much,” he says, sitting heavily on the bed. The bed frame is solid and sturdy, supporting him nicely. You shift, tucking your heels underneath you, feeling your underwear cling to the sticky wetness of your cunt. You do your best to ignore it. “It’s worse with someone here.” 
“How many times do you usually…you know.” You make a hand gesture. 
He purses his lips at your crudeness. “A day? Or in a session?”
God. He has sessions? “Both?”
“Two or three times a session. Two or three sessions a day, depending on how busy I am with work,” he says, coming to lay flat on the bed. He throws his arm over his eyes again. He shrugs a massive shoulder. “If it’s less than twice a day, I can’t really focus on anything else. It’s all my body wants and all I can think about.”
You frown. “That sounds terrible.” 
His hackles rise. “We don’t need to talk about it. That’s not what you’re here for.” 
“Right. Are you ready? Again?” 
“As I’ll ever fucking be,” he mutters, shucking his boxers down again and letting them rest around his knees. He’s definitely grown harder during your conversation together. His hands are shaking, so he clenches them into fists and rests them on his abs, taking a handful of deep, cleansing breaths. “Just—go on. Do as I said and stop when I say.” 
“Close your eyes while I lick my hand.”
“Jesus Christ,” he mutters, but he shuts his eyes. You make sure to really slick your palm, spitting into it quietly—but he flinches at the sound as if it was a gunshot. 
Reaching out, you create a gentle, loose fist above his cock and slowly bring it down, enveloping the velvety head in your slick fist. His entire body goes tight, muscles clenching all over, teeth clicking as his jaw clamps shut. He is burning warm in your palm, smooth and soft as you drag your hand down his length to the base, letting the dark blond curls of his pubes tickle the meaty portion of your palm. He shudders violently, mouth falling open in a silent sound, eyes flickering rapidly beneath his lids. You realize now that you’re watching his face more than you’re watching his cock, but it is currently the more interesting of the two. 
Cock slicked by your saliva, the journey back up is a smooth slide. As soon as the crown of his cock enters the loose grip of your fist, Ghost flinches violently and barks out: “Stop!” 
One. 
You withdraw right away. His cock drools, precum oozing from the tip and dripping down the flushed length. He groans, grinding his palms against his eyes, and you have to swallow your own curse. This is the most arousing thing that’s ever happened to you—that you’ve ever been a part of, that is. 
Ghost takes nearly two full minutes to calm down properly, his chest going from full-on heaves to shaky rise-and-falls. He lets out a lengthy breath and moves his palms away from his eyes, casting you a dazed, exhausted look. He nods and shuts his eyes. 
You do the same thing all over again. He makes it through two full, slow strokes before he is telling you to stop again. Two. Despite his orders, his heels dig into the bed. His body chases your touch, pelvis lifting from the soft sheets, straining to follow your hand. He digs his fingers into his hair and pulls, knuckles white, using the pain to ground himself. 
“Again,” he croaks.  
You don’t have to slick your hand anymore; he is leaking, cock frequently giving eager twitches and jerks, like it is trying to tempt you to touch it. This time, you only manage to drag your fist halfway down the length of his cock before he is sucking in a breath and warning you off of him—and you make a mistake. Instead of letting go, you lift your hand off, inadvertently giving his sensitive head another pass through the slick passage of your fist. Ghost makes a guttural noise, reaches down to grip the base of his cock again, a touch that looks brutal with its ferocity. Three. 
“Don’t speak,” he begs at a whisper, eyes closed. “Don’t say a fucking thing, don’t even move, just—just—“
You sit in still silence, watching him struggle to hold off, wondering whether you really even want him to. You wouldn’t sabotage him (not intentionally, at least), but watching him cum earlier had awoken something twisted inside you. A part of you wanted to push his boundaries, to help him desensitize himself, to help him achieve his goal of normalcy. The other part of you wanted to ruin him. Did he realize that you were fighting a battle of your own, now? 
“That was way too fucking close,” he sighs, letting go of his cock. His eyes turn on you, dark and narrowed and nearly angry. “You’re supposed to stop when I say so.”
“It was an accident,” you say. “I’ll be more careful.” 
He grumbles something underneath his breath that you can’t quite catch, but looks resolved to his fate. He gives a stern nod, and this time he watches. You feel his eyes as tangible as any touch, stroking along the hills and valleys of your knuckles. You’re trembling a little as you bring your hand down around him. You’ve barely touched him when he makes a choked sound and bats your hand out of the way, body rising up onto one elbow as he grips at the base of his cock with his other hand—except it’s too late. You can tell by the look on his face, that pleasurable doom, that miserable capitulation. 
You meet eyes with each other, half a second’s worth of acknowledgement before he shuts his own, tucking his chin to his chest to avoid your gaze. You wait for him to let go, to ruin it again, but he doesn’t: with dextrous, devastating familiarity, he grips his cock and strokes it feverishly, the wet sounds barely audible over the sound of your own heartbeat and frantic breaths as he finally spills over. It’s less explosive than his previous orgasm but appears no less devastating to him. Cum dribbles over his scarred knuckles, dripping down his angular wrist. He is near-silent, holding his breath, withholding his pleasured sounds from you. 
At length he drops back down to the mattress from his elbow, panting and red-faced, resting his dirty hand against his belly. 
“Fuck,” he sighs to the ceiling. 
“You lasted a lot longer that time,” you offer cheerfully. 
The look he gives you is the one the phrase ‘if looks could kill’ was modeled after—you’re pretty sure. He reaches for the towel and offers it to you first. You wipe your palm and hand it back so that he can clean himself. He goes to pull up his boxers again, but you stop him. 
“You said you usually go three times in a session. We should try one more time, shouldn’t we?” 
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harrysfolklore · 2 months
Text
first win - op81
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gif by @princemick <33
summary: the road to oscar’s first grand prix win. wc: 3.4K
folkie radio: OSC’S FIRST WIN 🥹🥹🥹 that race that so stressful but he did it and i’m so happy! fun fact: i wrote this fic last night bc i just FELT oscar was winning, i just added today’s race a few hours ago 😭 i hope you like it! leave feedback
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
February 5, 2023. Bahrain Grand Prix
Today was the big day. Oscar Piastri was set to make his Formula 1 debut as a McLaren driver.
You've talked about this countless of times, sharing dreams and fears, mapping out every step of his journey from karting to the pinnacle of motorsport.
Now, as you stood in the garage with the crowd's energy buzzing around you, it was hard to believe that moment had finally arrived.
Oscar was going through some pre-race talks with his team. You caught sight of him from a distance, his face a mask of focus and determination. When he spotted you, he broke into a smile, and for a brief moment, the tension seemed to melt away.
You make your way over to him as he finishes up with his team.
"Ready to set the track on fire, hotshot?" you tease, playfully tugging at the sleeve of his race suit.
Oscar grins, a mix of excitement and nerves dancing in his eyes. "Well, hopefully not literally. I don't think the team would appreciate a barbecued car on my first outing."
His chuckle is tinged with a hint of nervousness. You notice his hand fidgeting with the zipper of his race suit – a telltale sign of his pre-race jitters.
"Hey," you say softly, taking his hand. "Remember what we always say? You've earned this. You belong here."
"I know. It's just...," he took a deep breath, "It's really happening, isn't it? All those years of dreaming, and now..."
"And now you're about to drive the pants off everyone out there," you finish for him, your voice filled with confidence.
As the final call for drivers echoes through the garage, you both know it's time. Oscar's eyes lock with yours, a swirl of emotions passing between you. Without a word, he pulls you close, his lips meeting yours in a tender kiss. It's brief but filled with emotion.
"For luck," you whisper as you part, your foreheads still touching.
"With you here, I've got all the luck I need," Oscar replies softly, his smile warm and genuine.
With a final squeeze of your hand, he heads to where he's needed. You watch him go, your heart racing with anticipation.
The race begins, and for the first 14 laps, everything seems to be going well. Oscar is holding his own, fighting in the midfield, showing flashes of the talent that got him here.
But on lap 15, your heart sinks as you see his car slow down, veering off the racing line. The team radio crackles with the devastating news: "Box, box. We have a steering issue. We need to retire the car."
You watch, helpless, as Oscar brings the car back to the pits. The disappointment is palpable as he climbs out, his debut cut short.
As soon as he's free from the debrief, you find him in his driver's room. His face is a mask of frustration and disappointment.
"Hey," you say softly, taking his hand. "You okay?"
Oscar sighs, squeezing your hand. "Not really. I just... I wanted to finish the race, you know? Show everyone what I could do."
You pull him into a hug. "And you will. This is just the first race, Oscar. There are plenty more to come."
July 9, 2023. British Grand Prix
Silverstone is one of the most special races in the calendar, and for Oscar it's even more special because England is his second home.
He really wanted to deliver a great result. So far, he hadn't been able to place above P8 and he desperately wanted to improve that.
"I know you're nervous about tomorrow," you said as you laid your head on his chest, feeling him tense, "But you're going to do great, baby."
Oscar wraps his arm around you, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on your shoulder. "You really think so?" he asks, his voice a mix of hope and uncertainty.
You prop yourself up on your elbow to look at him. "I know so. You've been getting stronger with every race. The car's improving, and you're more comfortable with it. Plus, this is Silverstone - you know this track like the back of your hand."
He smiles, some of the tension leaving his face. "I do love this circuit."
"That's the spirit," you say, leaning in to kiss him softly. "Now get some sleep. You've got some racing to do in the morning."
The next day you watch from the garage, your heart swells with pride as Oscar delivers a perfect drive. As he crosses the finish line in P4, the garage erupts in cheers. It's his best result in Formula 1 to date, a performance that will silence any remaining doubters.
When he finally makes it back to the garage, helmet off and face beaming, you're there waiting. He sweeps you up in a hug, both of you laughing with joy.
"You did it!" you exclaim as he sets you down. "I told you you could do it!"
Oscar's eyes are shining with elation and pride. "We did it," he corrects you. "I couldn't have done this without your support."
September 24th, 2023. Japanese Grand Prix
You're perched on the edge of your couch, eyes glued to the TV screen, your heart racing as the lights go out at Suzuka. It's killing you not to be there in person, but work commitments had made the trip to Japan impossible.
Your mind flashes back to your conversation with Oscar yesterday after qualifying. His voice had been filled with excitement and a hint of disbelief as he told you about securing second place on the grid, right behind Max Verstappen.
"Can you believe it?" he had said, his words tumbling out in a rush. "P2! Right behind Max! I mean, I knew the car felt good, but this... this is incredible!"
You had matched his enthusiasm, your pride evident in your voice. "I told you you could do it! Just imagine what you could do in the race from there."
Now, as the race unfolds, you find yourself alternating between cheering out loud and holding your breath. When he crosses the finish line in third place, you leap off the couch, screaming in joy. His first podium and in just his 14th race.
You watch the podium ceremony with tears in your eyes, your heart swelling with pride as Oscar stands there, beaming, champagne in hand next to Max and Lando. It's a moment you've both dreamed about for so long.
It was killing you not to be there.
Hours pass, and you know Oscar must be caught up in team celebrations and media obligations. You're itching to talk to him, but you don't want to interrupt. Finally, just as you're considering going to bed, your phone rings.
"Hey, podium finisher," you answer, unable to keep the smile out of your voice.
"Hey yourself," Oscar replies, and you can hear the grin in his voice. "Sorry it took so long to call. It's been absolutely crazy here."
"Don't apologize! I'm just so incredibly proud of you, Oscar. You were amazing out there. Your first podium, it's a dream come true."
There's a moment of silence, and when Oscar speaks again, his voice is thick with emotion. "I just wish you could have been here. It doesn't feel quite complete without you."
"I know," you say softly. "I wish I could have been there too. But hey, this is just the first of many podiums, right? I'll be there for the next one."
"You bet it is," Oscar chuckles, "And you better be, I need someone to help me wash all this champagne out of my hair."
You laugh, feeling a mix of joy and longing. "I love you, Oscar. Enjoy your celebrations. You've earned it."
"I love you too," he replies warmly, "And I miss you, we have some celebration on our own to do."
October 8th, 2023. Qatar Grand Prix.
The heat in Qatar is suffocating, but the excitement in the air is even more intense. You're back in the paddock, determined not to miss another milestone in Oscar's career. Yesterday's sprint shootout had been a nail-biter, with Oscar securing pole position for the sprint race by mere hundredths of a second.
As the short-format race begins, you hold your breath. Oscar gets a perfect start, maintaining his lead into the first corner. As the final lap approaches, the McLaren garage is in shambles.
When Oscar crosses the finish line in first place, the explosion of joy is deafening. You're jumping up and down, tears streaming down your face as you watch him punch the air in triumph. He's done it - his first ever Formula 1 race win.
As Oscar pulls into parc fermé, you can see the emotion on his face even through his helmet. When he finally removes it, his smile is brighter than the Qatari sun. The team swarms him, and you hang back, letting him soak in this moment with the people who've worked so hard to make this possible.
When he finally breaks free and spots you, his face lights up even more. He rushes over, sweeping you into a tight embrace.
"You did it!" you exclaim, your voice muffled against his race suit. "Your first win, Oscar! I'm so proud of you!"
Oscar pulls back, his eyes shining with. "We did it," he corrects you, just as he did after Silverstone.
You laugh, wiping away happy tears. "Well this is just the beginning. Next stop, Grand Prix victory."
May 5, 2024. Miami Grand Prix.
The air in Oscar's driver's room is heavy with disappointment. You watch as he paces back and forth, still in his race suit, his face a mixture of frustration and barely contained anger.
The race had started so promisingly - Oscar had taken the lead early on and was driving beautifully. But then, a collision forced him into an unscheduled pit stop for a new front wing, dropping him down the order and out of contention for a podium finish.
"I had it," Oscar mutters, running a hand through his sweat-dampened hair. "I was leading the race, I had the pace. If it wasn't for that idiot..."
You step closer, your heart aching for him. "I know, baby. You were driving amazingly out there."
Oscar stops pacing and looks at you, his eyes filled with disappointment. "It's not fair. We've worked so hard, the car was perfect, and then..."
He trails off, shaking his head. You close the distance between you, gently taking his hands in yours. "Hey, look at me," you say softly.
Oscar meets your gaze, and you can see the vulnerability behind his frustration.
"You're right, it's not fair," you continue. "But that's racing sometimes. What matters is how you come back from this. And you will come back from this, stronger than ever."
"I just... I wanted this so badly."
You pull him into a hug, feeling him slowly relax against you. "I know. And your time will come, Oscar. This doesn't change how talented you are or how hard you've worked. It's just a bump in the road."
May 26th, 2024. Monaco Grand Prix.
The streets of Monaco buzz with anticipation for one the most important races in the Formula 1 calendar. For Oscar, this was his second time racing in Monaco, and the excitement was palpable.
From your spot in the McLaren hospitality suite, you had the perfect view of the circuit. Oscar thought you were back home, watching from the living room, but you couldn't miss this race. You wanted to see him shine on this iconic track.
You had coordinated with the team to keep your presence a surprise. As Oscar has his last quiet moments in his driver room before the preparations started, you sent him a quick text: "Good luck, love. Drive fast, be safe. I'll be cheering you on from home!"
Oscar's response was immediate. "Thanks, babe. I miss you. Wish you were here, but I'll bring home a trophy for you."
You smiled, knowing that he was in for a big surprise.
The race began, and Oscar quickly settled into a rhythm. He defended his P2 position until the checkered flag waved.
The team erupted in cheers, and you felt tears of joy streaming down your face. It was his third podium finish, and it was in Monaco of all places.
Oscar climbed out of his car, waving to the cheering crowd, his face glowing with joy and relief. As he stood on the podium, spraying champagne and celebrating with Charles and Carlos, you made your way down to the team area.
When the podium celebrations were over, and Oscar was heading back to the garage, you waited for the perfect moment. As he turned the corner, you stepped out, catching his eye.
"Oscar!" you called out, your voice carrying over the noise of the paddock.
He froze, his eyes widening in surprise. "What are you doing here?" he exclaimed, a huge grin spreading across his face as he rushed over to you.
"I couldn't miss this. I had to see you race in Monaco," you threw your arms around him, laughing.
Oscar hugged you tightly, lifting you off your feet. "You sneaky little... I can't believe you're here!"
"Congratulations, baby. You were incredible out there," you pulled back slightly, looking into his eyes.
"This... this is amazing. Thank you for being here. It means everything to me."
"I wouldn't have missed it for the world," you replied, kissing him softly.
July 7th, 2024. British Grand Prix
Oscar had been more motivated than ever. After finishing second the previous week in Austria, he was eager to claim his first Grand Prix victory, and what better place than Silverstone.
He started strong, fighting his way to the front and eventually taking the lead. The team was buzzing with excitement; victory seemed within reach.
But then, disaster struck. A poorly timed pit stop strategy caused Oscar to lose crucial positions. Despite his best efforts, he crossed the finish line in P4. It was his best finish at Silverstone but not the victory he had hoped for.
Later that day back at Oscar's apartment you watched him pace back and forth. He finally stopped and leaned against the window, staring out into the night. His shoulders were tense, and his jaw was set in frustration. The silence was deafening.
"What's on your mind?" you asked softly, breaking the silence.
Oscar didn't turn around. "I don't want to talk about it," he muttered.
You stood up and walked over to him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. "I know you're upset. But sometimes talking helps."
He sighed deeply and turned to face you, his eyes filled with frustration and disappointment. "I was leading the race. I could have won. My first victory, right here at Silverstone. And it slipped away because of a stupid strategy call."
You reached out and took his hand, squeezing it reassuringly. "It wasn't your fault, Oscar. You drove an amazing race. Everyone saw how talented you are."
"But it doesn't change the fact that I could have won," he said, his voice cracking with frustration. "I've been waiting for this moment my whole life, and it was right there. And now... I don't know when I'll get another chance like this."
You pulled him into a tight hug, feeling his body tense before he finally relaxed against you. "Your time will come. I know it will. You've shown everyone what you're capable of, and there will be other races, other chances. This is just one race in a long career."
Oscar pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes. "I just wanted it so badly. To win here, in front of the home crowd... it would have meant everything."
"I know," you said softly. "And you'll get there. Maybe not today, but soon. And when you do, it'll be even sweeter because of everything you've gone through to get there."
July 21, 2024. Hungary Grand Prix
The Hungaroring buzzed with excitement as the cars lined up on the grid. Oscar, starting from the front row, felt a mixture of determination and nervous energy. As the lights went out, he got a perfect start, pulling away cleanly from the pack.
Lap after lap, Oscar maintained his lead. The team's excitement grew with each passing circuit. This could be it - his first Grand Prix victory.
However, as the race progressed, pit stop strategies began to shake up the order. After a particularly well-timed stop, Lando emerged just ahead of him. The tension in the McLaren garage was palpable.
Soon, team radio crackled to life. Reminding both drivers about strategies, and particularly asking Lando to give the position to Oscar, creating tension both on and off track.
In the final laps, Lando finally relented. He moved slightly wide in a corner, allowing Oscar to slip past. Oscar crossed the finish line first, claiming his maiden Grand Prix victory.
The team erupted in cheers, but the celebration felt somewhat muted. As Oscar climbed out of his car in parc fermé, his face was hard to read.
As you watched Oscar ascend the podium, your heart swelled with pride. Despite the complicated circumstances of his win, seeing him stand on the top step, the Australian national anthem playing in his honor, was a dream come true.
The champagne spray began, and you couldn't help but smile as Oscar, Lando, and Lewis doused each other in celebration. For a moment, the tension seemed to melt away as the three drivers laughed and enjoyed the moment.
As Oscar descended from the podium, his eyes immediately sought you out in the crowd. You managed to catch him just before he was whisked away for interviews.
"Congratulations, champ," you said, pulling him into a quick embrace.
Oscar hugged you tightly, his race suit still damp with champagne. "Thank you for being here," he murmured against your ear.
You pulled back, searching his face. "How are you feeling?"
A flicker of emotion crossed his features. "I'm not sure yet. I need to process everything."
"I understand," you nodded. "Go do your interviews. We'll talk properly later."
Oscar's eyes softened. He glanced around quickly, then leaned in and gave you a quick kiss. "Love you, see you after."
Hours later, after all the media obligations and team debriefs were over, Oscar finally made his way back to the McLaren hospitality area.
As he entered the room, his eyes immediately sought you out. You were there, beaming with pride, and the sight of you seemed to melt away some of his conflicted feelings.
"There's my champion," you said softly as he approached.
Oscar's face broke into a genuine smile, the first one since he'd crossed the finish line. He pulled you into a tight embrace, burying his face in your neck.
"I did it," he murmured against your skin. "I actually did it."
You pulled back slightly to look at him, cupping his face in your hands. "You did. And I am so incredibly proud of you, Oscar."
His eyes searched yours, vulnerability evident in his gaze. "It wasn't exactly how I imagined my first win would be," he admitted.
"I know," you nodded, understanding in your voice. "But that doesn't make it any less of an achievement. You drove brilliantly today, from start to finish."
"I just wish... I wish it had been a clean fight to the end, you know?" Oscar sighed, leaning his forehead against yours, "Without the team orders and all that."
"Hey," you said, making him meet your eyes again. "This is Formula 1. It's rarely ever straightforward. What matters is that you proved yourself out there today. You're a Grand Prix winner now, and no one can take that away from you."
A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "When did you get so wise?"
"Oh, I've always been wise. You're just finally starting to notice," you teased, earning a chuckle from him.
"Thank you," he said quietly. "For always being here, for believing in me even when things get complicated."
"Always," you promised, leaning in to kiss him softly.
The kiss deepened, both of you pouring your emotions into it - your pride and joy, his relief and love. When you finally parted, Oscar was smiling more brightly.
"So, Grand Prix winner," you grinned, "ready to go celebrate properly?"
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scarlet-star-witch · 2 months
Text
The moon and his sun (Part VII - Final Part)
Aemond Targaryen x Female Reader
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Summary: People would remember their story. Even decades after they were gone, Septa’s would tell young children about the one-eyed dragon prince and his sweet wife as if they were a part of a fairytale, too good to be true for the harshness real life possessed.
Aemond meets a young girl who quickly becomes his most cherished friend and changes the course of history.
Word count: 13.2 K
Warnings: Angst as usual, Aegon testing my patience, smut, and fluff
Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5 Part 6 ... Epilogue
~~
She and Aemond had barely spoken since their fight, the strain between them growing with each passing day.
He was always quick to leave their chambers in the early morning, leaving her to break her fast by herself. 
She didn’t mind, she found she had trouble even meeting his eye without feeling as though her insides were crumbling into dust, reminding her of how easy it would be to lose him. 
It felt like dying a slow, agonizing death. 
The door to their chambers opened and she instinctively perked up at the thought of seeing her husband, despite the warring emotions within her, but she immediately froze, fear rising as Aegon strolled inside as if they were his own chambers. 
He smiled widely at the sight of her and was quick to take a seat beside her, entirely too close for her liking. 
“What are you doing?”
“Joining my sweet sister for breakfast.” Aegon smiled, the gesture anything but innocent as he helped himself to the spread of food in front of him. “Where is my brother?”
“He’ll be back soon.” She answered immediately, as if she could use Aemond’s presence to deter him from staying. But with the way he looked at her intently, it was obvious he didn’t believe her. 
He knew the rift between them kept Aemond out of his chambers for hours on end. 
With a lump in her throat that grew larger and heavier with each second that passed with Aegon beside her, she kept her eyes down, beginning to sparsely pick at her food. 
“You know I never thought much of you.” Aegon began, his gaze never wavering from her tense form that refused to relax in his presence. 
She flinched and jerked away as Aegon’s fingers brushed against her cheek, her breathing becoming heavy as she fought hard not to smack the most powerful man in the realm. 
He smirked at her as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, feeling victorious at the sight of her discomfort. 
“It wasn’t until I saw you bouncing on my brother’s cock…saw this body bare, saw the kind of whore you are, that it felt as though I was truly seeing you for the first time.” He crooned, his fingers tracing down the length of her jaw and down her neck. 
As his fingers trailed downwards, getting close to the dip of her breasts, she finally snapped, her hand shooting out, gripping onto his wrist tightly, desperate to stop him before he could touch her further, in places only her husband had ever touched her. 
“Careful, sister. The punishment for putting your hands on your King could cost you your hand.” Aegon warned, delighting in the fury that crossed her features. “Save that fire for my bed.” 
“I will slit my throat before you could ever take me to your bed.” She told him with a fire in her voice that only made his eyes light with intrigue and delight, knowing he was getting under her skin exactly the way he wanted. 
The door to their chambers opened, Aemond stepping inside wearily, though when he saw Aegon, how close he was sitting to his wife, his wrist encased in her grip, her face drawn tightly with hatred, did cold dread settle over him, washing away any ounce of hesitation he felt to face her and their fight.
“What are you doing here?” He barked at his brother, his face hard with a deadly scowl.
“Just getting to know my future wife.” 
Aemond grit his teeth. It took all of his willpower to not beat his brother into oblivion. 
“Get out.” He ordered sternly, though Aegon only laughed and leaned back in his seat.
“No.”
Aegon’s sharp response had Aemond flinching in surprise, his surprise overtaking his anger for a moment at the presence of his weak brother’s backbone. It seemed that the crown on his head had finally made him unmovable in the face of his younger’s brother’s rage that used to make him cower.
“I am your King, you don’t command me, brother.” 
Aemond, without caring for the consequences or the threat of Aegon’s guards that stood outside the door, stormed forward, grabbing his brother by the shirt and hauling him to his feet, desperate to wrench him away from his wife who watched on with fear. 
“If you have any hope of winning this war, it is because of me and my dragon. You are a drunken idiot that has no idea what it truly takes to rule and if you wish to keep breathing and sitting on that throne you will keep your mouth shut and stay far away from my wife.” Aemond spat darkly, jerking his wastrel of a brother in his harsh grip. 
“I am already a Kinslayer and I will take whatever judgment the Gods give me for sinning again.” Aemond threatened him, his hatred clear. 
Aegon looked back at him with nothing but disdain, hating the fact that he needed Aemond, needed Vhagar, to fight his cause. His harsh glare moved to the woman who remained sitting, watching the brothers with wide, nervous eyes. 
“I will see you soon, Sister.” Aegon drawled out the word as if it were an insult, sneering at her one last time before he shoved his brother off him and made his way out of their chambers, leaving the couple in a tense silence. 
Aemond breathed heavily and turned toward his wife, his eye softening immediately at the sight of her. 
“Did he hurt you?”
“No.” She spoke quietly. 
Aemond watched her carefully, noting that she had yet to meet his eye. He sighed and sat next to her. The news from the council the previous night that he had yet to tell her weighed on him heavily. 
She had been asleep by the time he returned to their chambers last night and he loathed to wake her, especially for news that would only upset her. 
“We are to go to battle tomorrow.” He finally blurted out. 
His words finally had her gaze rising to meet him, a startled fearfulness growing in her eyes. 
“I am taking Vhagar to Rook’s Rest.” 
She remained quiet as she took in his words, the growing fear inside of her quickly incapacitating her. A thousand thoughts ran through her head, most of them all the ways she could lose him.  
The longer she stayed quiet, the more tense he became. 
“I’ve talked to my mother.” He continued quickly, looking at her hopefully. “She has agreed to let go of the annulment. I’ve asked her to station more guards at the door. A group will be with you any day I’m not here. They will protect you while I’m gone and if I… if anything happens in battle… they will take you home.” 
Her eyes watched him calculatingly, as if she were staring at a stranger and not the man she loved. Her mind was a mess of thoughts, none of which she could really make sense of. 
Her silence rang out in the room loudly, agonizing Aemond. He looked at her intently, pleadingly. 
“Say something, please.” He whispered weakly. 
She let out a long sigh, her face impassive, not revealing any emotion. Even the sight of her husband’s sadness wasn’t enough to sway her. 
“What do you want me to say?”
“Anything.” He practically begged, her monotonous voice causing an ache to grow within him.
She grit her teeth, looking away from him. “Do you really believe it?”
“What?”
“That your mother is no longer a pawn in that ridiculous plan. That a few more measly guards will protect me from your family. That in the event of your death, I’ll be free to go home and not thrown in the black cells or shackled to Aegon’s bed.”
Aemond flinched at each of her words, looking pained at the reminder of the danger she was in, the danger his own family was placing on her head. 
“You are many things, Husband, but I have never known you to be naive.” 
“I am not naive-”
“You are if you believe I am safe here, especially in your absence.” She interrupted him sharply. “If you were to die in battle, that would be the end of me. No one would take me home, no one would let me live out the rest of my days as a mourning widow, they would have their boots on my neck the minute it was clear you would not be around to protect me.”
Only a stunted breath escaped him, as words were lost to him.
He looked at her pleadingly, but the guilt that lingered in his gaze did not go unnoticed by her and it only served to fuel her anger, knowing that he knew exactly the situation they were in, exactly the hard rock they were pushed up against by his own family.
“They won’t hurt you.” He began and held back a wince as she scoffed and shook her head. “They won’t. I have to believe it.”
“You have to?” She repeated, almost mockingly.
“Yes, because I cannot take another fucking breath if I don’t.” He replied loudly, his desperation, his slipping control clear as he looked at her, his eye wide and brimming with frustration. 
Her expression changed in an instant, the hard front she was portraying shattering the moment she saw how close her husband was to cracking. He had always tried to shield her from the worst parts of him, never wanting her to worry or fuss over him.
It wasn’t often he let her see him falter, but she could see now just how exhausted and broken he was over everything that had happened in the past month. 
She suddenly thought of all the times he had held her, picked her back up when her grief knocked her down, and she struggled to think of the times she was there for him, when he allowed her to be strong for him when he couldn’t.
He didn’t let himself show his weakness, hardly even to her, and it was slowly crushing him. 
“Do you truly have to go tomorrow?” She asked quietly, the fight gone from her voice. 
“I do.” 
There was a hesitation to him, as if he knew it wasn’t a good idea, but didn’t have another choice. He was burdened by the duty he was shackled to, beaten down by the sentiment that had been drilled in him since he was a child.
He felt this was all he could do, simply because his family told him so.
She hated they had such a hold on him, that they held such control over him.
“I will come back.” He told her, looking at her intently, as if he could will her to believe it. 
She just nodded, her throat growing tight with emotion at the thought of how tomorrow could go so wrong, at the thought of losing the one person she cherished with her entire being. The thought of losing him was already unfathomable, but the thought of losing him now, never being able to heal the rift between them was enough to break her. 
He stood, hesitating for a moment, knowing he had to meet with Ser Criston, but wary of leaving his wife, of furthering the divide between them. 
He looked to her longingly, as if he wanted to reach out to her, to kiss her, to lavish his affection on her as he used to, but just couldn’t find the courage to. 
He didn’t know if she even wanted him to, so he settled for a half-hearted nod and a mumble of goodbye before leaving her side once again, feeling as though the cracks in his heart were growing deeper and deeper with each passing day they were fractured.
She remained in his thoughts for the rest of the day, as she always did any moment he was not at her side.
He didn’t see her until that night at the feast Aegon was adamant on hosting. It was more of an excuse for Aegon to lavish in praises for his bravery for their planned battle on the morrow. 
Aemond could only roll his eyes at his brother’s brazen showmanship. 
They would run out of coin soon enough with all the celebrations he’d thrown in the short amount of time he sat on the throne. 
It seemed parties were the only thing Aegon could think to decree during his reign, despite the war that raged. It was a wonder a battle even got planned with his ambivalence for planning anything that didn’t include wine.
He looked to his wife sat by his side, her expression portraying she’d rather be anywhere else. She boredly looked among the dancing couples and reveling Lords who were drinking copiously, their laughter unable to stir a smile of her own. 
Aemond knew better than to ask if she wanted to dance. He knew she would refuse. 
He thought back to that night, the beginning of their divide and wanted to scream and cry all at once for the state of things, for this dreaded feeling of being so far from her in a way he had never experienced before. 
The thought of her not by his side was too terrifying to even imagine. The thought of her willingly separating from him broke his heart and he didn’t know how to react in any way but anger.
She had barely spoken to him since that night and it wasn’t as though he was any more forthcoming in swallowing his pride and apologizing for his anger that had struck her that fateful day.
Next to him, his mother sat, sending him a weak smile. Despite her assurance that she wouldn’t be forcing an annulment, he couldn’t deny that he had trouble believing her, no matter how hard he tried, no matter how agonizing it was to not believe it. So he did what he could to force himself to. 
But he knew he would worry every time he was not at his wife’s side that Aegon would swoop in and use his power to take her from him.
His brother was certainly not above despicable behavior. 
His wife was barely able to look at his family. A curt smile was all she was able to give as they arrived that evening. The only real emotion she had shown was towards Helaena, but even then it was only a weak smile that didn’t reach her eyes. 
Aemond was sure it did not go unnoticed how tense the table of royals looked. He could only imagine the gossip that was spreading about them. 
He felt as though he could breathe easier once his mother retired for the night, his view of her irrevocably changed since that meeting. 
He tapped his fingers against the table erratically, stealing another look at his wife. A servant placed a new cup of wine before her and Aemond waved his hand, refusing another cup for himself, it was only making his already churning stomach worse. 
“Are you enjoying the music?” He asked, internally wincing to himself for how awkward he sounded as he tried to engage his wife in conversation. 
“Not particularly.” She answered monotonously. 
Aemond’s lips parted, but no words were found. It felt like talking to a stranger than to the woman he had loved for years.
“Could you two cheer up?” Aegon chastised as he approached the table to fill up his cup. “You look like you’re attending a funeral.” 
Aegon’s attention on her seemed to be the last straw of her already waning patience. With a sigh, she pushed her chair out and stood.
“I’m tired, I’m going to retire for the night.” She explained and left without another word.
Aemond watched her go with a frown. The lack of affection wasn’t something he was used to, not from her at least and it was enough to leave him with a sick feeling in his stomach. 
“She’s become quite frigid.” Aegon noted, not bothering to look at his brother and catch the glare he would surely be sending his way. “Have you stopped fucking her? Is that why she’s become such a surly bitch?” 
Aemond grit his teeth, his hands twitching with the urge to knock his brother’s teeth out. It seemed the drunken idiot had already forgotten about his earlier threat on his life. 
“Well, if she’s not drinking it.” Aegon laughed, grabbing the goblet that sat before his wife’s empty seat, handing it over to some foot soldier from the Lannister army who eagerly swallowed it down in one gulp, the cheering crowd around him growing raucous. 
Aemond could barely contain his annoyance, his desire to leave overwhelming. His fingers tapped at the table incessantly, itching to follow his wife, to be as far from Aegon’s arrogance as he could. 
“Must you look so sullen, brother?” Aegon chastised him.
Meeting the glassy eyes of his drunken brother, Aemond was forced to use all the willpower he possessed to not throw a punch, removing the smug smile from his face. 
“Stop crying over your wife. There are plenty of other women here-”
“Don’t finish that sentence.” Aemond snapped at him darkly. 
Aegon scoffed, a multitude of insults on the tip of his tongue, but the sound of hacking coughs caught both of their attention. They looked to the Lannister soldier, his eyes wide, his face turning red as he gasped for air that wouldn’t come. He clutched at his neck, his body-shaking coughs bringing him to his knees.
The chattering of the crowd ceased, leaving terrified gasps and screams as men quickly surrounded the dying man, surveying for a threat.
Aemond stood from his seat, taking large steps forward, pushing others out of the way. He took in the scene before him with a growing dread. His gaze moved from the man twitching out a last painful breath, blood and bile spilling from his lips, to the empty cup on the ground. 
The cup that was meant for his wife. 
Something broke inside him at the realization. 
He rushed out of the room, elbowing his way past the crowd. He sprinted through the halls, a shrill ringing in his ears, his mind conjuring the horrible sights that he would find. 
What if he wasn’t fast enough this time?
He had already lost his child, he couldn’t lose her. 
The thoughts raced through his mind torturously as he ran, his fear growing with each step. His pulse thundered in his ears, his throat tight as he pictured the gruesome scene waiting for him.
He came to an abrupt stop, almost losing his footing, his chest heaving as he narrowed his gaze on the lone guard at their chamber doors. The man startled slightly at the sudden appearance of the disheveled prince and he bowed, greeting him dutifully. 
“Has anyone been inside?” 
“No, my Prince. Not since your wife.”
He stepped forward purposefully, the adrenaline in his veins and the fear that lingered, causing his hands to tremble. 
“Where’s the rest of you?”
“My Prince?” The guard questioned in confusion.
“Where are the other guards? There’s supposed to be more of you here keeping watch.” He seethed impatiently, the man before him blanching in intimidation.
“I-I’m sorry my Prince. It is only me. I have not heard of any others to be stationed with me.”
Aemond stared the man down angrily, his mind racing with thoughts he couldn’t quite make sense of. He pushed past the guard and rushed into his chambers, his shoulders sagging immediately, expelling a heavy exhale of relief as he spotted her. 
His wife lay in their bed, fast asleep and unharmed. 
He stepped towards her on weak legs, sitting on the edge of the bed, taking a moment to just look at her, to ease his wounded mind. He knew he wasn’t reaching, that what had happened just minutes ago, that man choking on his own blood, was no accident. 
Someone had tried to take her from him, again. 
He leaned down, placing a gentle kiss to her forehead, reveling in the sweet scent of the floral oil she had put in her hair that night. 
“I’ll make it right, I promise.” He whispered into the quiet room, needing to speak the promise aloud, even if she wasn’t awake to hear it. He needed to reassure himself that he could protect her, for he felt as though he had been failing. 
With one last lingering look at her, he stood and stepped out of the room, giving a quick warning to the guard to be on alert as he stomped down the hall. 
He made it to his mother’s chambers, barely acknowledging Ser Criston who stood vigil and stormed inside. 
His mother startled at his abrupt entrance and her face twisted, gearing up to scold him, but she soon noticed the fear in his eye, the lingering fury that made her stiffen.
“What’s happened?” She asked tersely, placing a hand over her racing heart, her stomach churning for what she was about to hear. 
“A man was murdered tonight.” He spoke monotonously. 
“What? Who?” Alicent asked breathlessly. 
“He drank from my wife’s cup. He drank the wine that was meant for her and barely a minute later he was dead.” 
Alicent’s throat went tight, her blood running cold within her veins. She straightened her posture, attempting to remain composed. 
“Rhaenyra and Daemon’s bloodlust knows no bounds.” 
“Where were the guards?” Aemond asked abruptly, glossing over his mother’s comment.
“What guards?” 
“In front of our chambers.” He clarified, his voice hard as stone. “I asked you to assign more, to ensure my wife would be protected. You said you would, but there was only one.”
Alicent’s heart raced wildly within her chest, the rapid rise and fall of her chest visible as she tried hard to settle her breathing. 
“I will have a talk with them. They should have been there.” She answered, the wavering of her voice clear, forcing her to swallow hard in an attempt to get rid of the lump that had grown and threatened to stop her from breathing.
Aemond watched his mother thoughtfully, the sinking feeling he had already been plagued with growing tenfold the longer he watched her, slowly becoming aware of her charade. 
His eyes moved to watch the flames dance in the fireplace, breathing out a long sigh as the thoughts in his head swirled like a hurricane. He wanted to refuse it, to not believe his mother would ever have anything to do with something so sinister, but her entire being portrayed guilt. He knew his family's ambitions made for crass and even sometimes despicable actions, he knew the way of war, he just never expected to fall victim to it at the hands of the ones who should have loved him dearly. 
“I was excited to be a father.” He started quietly, the tension in his body the only sign of the storm silently raging within him. “I knew I would have done anything for my child. They could’ve asked me for the stars and I would have flown on Vhagar in the night and taken every one of them from the sky.” 
The mention of the babe he had lost had Alicent’s chest tightening, her eyes beginning to sting with tears that threatened to give away the turmoil plaguing her. 
“I don’t even have a babe to hold and I know I would have done whatever I could to make them happy.” His voice became stunted, anger tinging the heartbreaking words that kept his emotions on a short tether, the reminder of what he lost, what had been ripped so brutally from him and his beloved. 
His lone eye raised from the fire and landed on his mother who seemed to squirm under his intense gaze. 
“You… you weren’t even trying to keep me from my happiness, you’re trying to rip it right out of my hands.”
Alicent’s breath caught in her throat, her stomach sinking with dread. 
“I don’t know what-”
“You know exactly what I’m speaking of.” He interrupted her angrily, his hands clenched into fists as it took all of his restraint to not lunge at her, having to constantly remind himself that the woman in front of him was his mother.
“Think about what you are accusing me of, it’s absolutely ridiculous.” Alicent screeched, her emotions fraying as she desperately tried to pull her son back to her. 
“You never wanted me to marry her. You wanted to deny me her, you wanted to tear her from me even when you knew she was the only one that truly made me happy.”
Alicent rolled her eyes, her fear quickly shifting into indignation. That Island girl has sunk her claws so deep in her son, she scarcely recognized him anymore. 
“The only one?” She questioned, almost sarcastically. “After everything I’ve done and you still don’t see that it was all for you, for our family.” 
Aemond let out a bitter sounding laugh, a sound that would have sent chills down the spine of a lesser man. 
“Tell me, Mother, when exactly were you thinking about my happiness? When you tried to force an annulment from the woman I love or when you tried to murder her?” 
Alicent’s voice caught in her throat. Each word was like a slap to the face. The guilt churned in her stomach so violently she thought she was going to be sick. 
“I know grandsire’s ambitions would have retribution, but I never thought you would bend to them at the expense of your children.”
Alicent sunk back in her chair, the fight swept from her as she realized Aemond was not going to budge an inch. She picked at the skin by her nails anxiously, her teeth biting her bottom lip incessantly as her heart raced. 
“We needed to help Aegon’s cause.”
The whispered words were all the confession he needed to hear. 
Aemond fumed silently, his jaw clenching so tightly it was a wonder he didn’t crack any of his teeth. His first thought was that he couldn’t believe his own mother would do this to him, to break him into disrepair by taking his wife from him, but as he remembered the forced annulment, he soon realized he didn’t really know his mother at all. 
“We know what Rhaenyra would do to us once she sat on the throne. I had to protect you, I did what I could so our family would survive.”
Aemond scoffed bitterly. He too once thought his life would be forfeit once his half-sister rose to power, but the longer he thought of it over the years, the more he spoke of those fears with his wife, the more he realized how unfounded they had been. 
“You really think my father-by-law would allow that to happen? Ixtal is King’s Landing’s greatest importer, you think Rhaenyra would risk the entirety of the realm, her position as ruler, just to do away with siblings she could not spare a second thought for?” 
“You don’t know that!” Alicent yelled, becoming desperate as she felt as though her son was slipping through her fingers.
Aemond sighed and stood from his chair, heading towards the door, but Alicent’s sobs stopped him as she begged him not to go.
“Aemond, you have to understand.” She cried. “I had to do what I could to keep you safe. You will see that one day, you will see that I only did what I thought was right for our family.”
To hear her speak of the life of his wife, his greatest love, as nothing more than collateral made him feel sick, his disdain growing even further. 
“I hope you will see one day that your ambition is what ruined this family.” 
With those final words, he left, leaving his mother to sob in solitude. He numbly walked back to his chambers, the look in his mother’s eyes haunting his mind. 
It wasn’t until he was behind the closed door of his chamber, standing in the dark room that he allowed himself to release a shuddering breath, his throat tightening as it all caught up to him. 
His mother’s betrayal was like a dagger to the stomach, letting the wound bleed until there was nothing left of him. 
His gaze fell on his sleeping wife and the dam broke. Tears fell from his eyes as he realized how close he had been to losing her and by the hands of his own family. It was enough to undo him completely. 
He knelt at her bedside, unable to stop the tears that fell. His lip trembled, shaking breaths escaping him as he clutched to her hand. 
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He whispered weakly. 
She stirred and blinked her weary eyes open, frowning immediately as she noticed the tears her husband was shedding.
“Aemond? What happened?” She asked tiredly, propping herself up on her elbow as she intertwined their fingers. 
“I didn’t protect you.” He whispered, his voice tight with tearful emotion.
“What are you talking about?”
“The second this war started, I should’ve done something. I knew you weren’t safe here, I knew you weren’t safe with them and I didn’t do anything. I’m so sorry, issa prūmia, please forgive me.” 
“Aemond…” She was stunned, watching as her husband, the stoic man she knew, broke into pieces before her. 
She laid her hand over his that held her other tightly, caressing gentle touches over his hardened knuckles. 
“Darling, there’s nothing to forgive.” She assured him, but the look on his face remained tortured. 
He sniffled and wiped his tears forcefully, tearing his hand from hers and he got to his feet, making his way across their chambers to her wardrobe. 
“I’m getting you out of here.” He spoke, his voice now full of determination.
“What?”
“It’s not safe for you here. You’re going back to Ixtal.”
Her heart jumped in her chest, it was everything she had wanted since this war started, but she couldn’t ignore the lingering dread that settled within her like lead, realizing what it would mean for them. The thought of separating from him was unbearable. 
“I’m not leaving without you.” She spoke forcefully, standing from the bed, her eyes hardened as she stared back at her husband. 
She knew it was a big ask to leave his family and his home for her, but circumstances were different now. She had already lost so much, she wasn’t going to lose him too, she certainly wasn’t going to let his family take advantage of her absence and shackle him to another woman. 
Aemond swallowed thickly and stepped towards her, his hands cradling her face gently as he revered her with nothing but adoration, his decision made in a split second.
“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere but by your side.” 
Her face softened, emotions swelling, tightening her throat. 
“What happened?” She asked quietly. His change of heart was unexpected and the state of him she had woken to was more than concerning. It wasn’t often he let himself feel his emotions, except anger of course, and it was upsetting to say the least.
Aemond seemed to shudder at her question, his eyes holding a faraway look that seemed tortured. 
“Not yet.” He said, his voice barely audible. He would tell her everything once they were safe, once they were far from King’s Landing and his scheming family. “Pack your things, we need to be quick and leave before the light.” 
She nodded and rushed to her wardrobe, hauling out as many dresses as she could carry and tossed them on the bed. A sudden realization came to her, igniting her worries once more.
“Wait, Aemond.” She spoke up frantically. “Helaena and the children. We can’t leave without them, they’re not safe here.”
Aemond’s entire being softened. Helaena and her children were the only ones, outside of her, that he cared about above anyone else and her care for them, her willingness to accept them as her own warmed his heart, only confirming to him that he was making the right decision.
His mother’s betrayal stung, it festered in him like a disease that threatened to spread and ruin him, but he pushed it down. He would feel the heartbreak when they were safe in Ixtal.
It didn’t take long for them to pack their meager belongings. They didn’t need to take much, there wasn’t much of anything with sentimental value he would miss. He just needed his wife at his side. 
They traveled through the hidden halls, quickly coming to the entrance of Helaena’s room. Aemond pushed the entrance open slowly, wincing at the noise, hoping he wasn’t about to scare his sweet sister.
He was soon shocked, flinching back as he met the awaiting eyes of his sister, her children cradled to her sides, bags at their feet.
“Is it time?” 
“What- Helaena…”
“We are leaving, are we not?” 
“Well… yes, but-”
“Let’s go. We shouldn’t waste any more time.” She smiled warmly, placing her hand on her brother’s cheek briefly before moving towards her friend, wrapping her up in a tight hug, her gratitude overflowing from her. “I knew you would be our saving grace.”
The whispered words of the Princess left her shocked. She had to shake herself of her surprise and hauled Jaehaerys into her arms. With Helaena carrying Jaehaera, their bags secured with Aemond leading them, they were on their way. His hand fluttered towards the sword at his hip every so often, senses sharp and at the ready for anything and anyone that dared to stop them.
It didn’t take long to get to the Dragon Pit.
“I’ll meet you outside with Vhagar.” Aemond assured her and with one last squeeze of her hand, he was gone. 
Her heart was in her throat, her palms sweating with nerves as she helped strap the children’s bags to Dreamfyre’s saddle. Once Helaena was seated on her dragon, she helped Jaehaera up and strapped her in. 
“It’s alright, my Darlings.” Helaena cooed to her children who were quiet and sullen with fright. “We’re going to a beautiful place where we’ll be safe.” 
“Is father coming too?” Jaehaera asked quietly and Helaena shook her head, almost seemingly delighted to share the news of the absence of their father. But the child just nodded and whispered ‘good’. 
She repressed a shudder. She didn’t want to think of the neglect Aegon had forced on his children. She swept Jaehaerys up into her arms once again, her heart aching as he nuzzled into her, burying his face in the crook of her neck. 
“You like to swim, don’t you, Jae?”
He nodded against her and she smiled, brushing her fingers through his hair soothingly.
“I know where to find the most beautiful beaches. You’ll get to swim in the bluest water you’ve ever seen where the fish swim between your toes and jump out of the water to greet you.”
“Will you show me?” 
She smiled and nodded. “I’ll take you there myself.” 
With the assurance, he loosened his grip on her, more at ease. A distant roar caught their attention, the familiar sound of Vhagar. With one last look to Helaena, silently assuring her that she would keep her son safe, she slipped out of the Dragon Pit, hurrying her way up the hill where Vhagar rested. 
Her hope spiked, her fear receding slightly as she spotted Aemond atop his dragon. Their escape was imminent. No one would stop them now, not when they had Vhagar to face. 
She helped Jaehaerys climb up into the waiting arms of his uncle who strapped him in carefully. She climbed, her movements familiar use, not something she’d ever thought she would say in relation to dragon riding, but Aemond had been insistent over the years of his two favorite girls bonding. 
She used to roll her eyes at him, but now she couldn’t have been more thankful. 
As she settled herself, her heart sped, uncertainty suddenly overtaking her adrenaline, the gravity of their actions soon crashing into her overwhelmingly. She placed her hand over Aemond's, stopping him before he could grasp the reins. 
“Aemond,” She spoke, her voice tight as her mind raced. “You have to be sure, entirely sure, that this is what you want.” 
He sighed, as if disappointed by her hesitation, believing he would ever second guess the decision to run away with her, to keep her safe. 
“I’ve never been more sure of anything.” He assured her, tilting her chin with his finger so she was looking at him head on. “I promised you, didn’t I? We’re going to Ixtal where we’ll grow old and raise our children.” 
His words, which were once said in the comfort of their sheets, their love nothing more than a secret from the rest of the realm, soothed every ounce of insecurity that had crept through her veins. 
She breathed out in relief and leaned forward, kissing him swiftly. 
Dreamfyre’s roar broke them apart and they watched as Helaena took flight with her daughter. 
“Are you ready, Jae?” 
The child nodded eagerly to his uncle and leaned back into his aunt’s arms, holding tightly to her as the mighty dragon below them rumbled and stretched her wings, taking to the skies with ease. 
The moonlight was their only guide in the dead of night. It wasn’t until they settled high in the sky, covered by the clouds, easy on their course, did she finally let herself relax. She leaned back into the strong chest behind her, her husband’s hand leaving the reins to wrap around her, securing herself to his front, his forehead rested against hers, a look of nothing but pure contentment on his face, a far cry from the scowl that had been securely etched onto his features for months. 
She knew his decision to leave could not have been easy and she was terrified to hear what had happened, what the final straw was to get him to agree to leave the place he called home, to leave his mother behind.
She leaned into him, as if needing his comfort from the mere thought of what transpired to make him turn his back on the woman that raised him.
Aemond held her tightly, breathing in the scent of her, his eye falling closed in fulfillment at the feel of her skin under his fingertips. Even the brush of her hair against his face in the wind was the greatest thing he could have ever felt. 
She was all he needed. 
A weight was lifted from his chest, allowing him to breathe easier the farther they flew from King’s Landing. His family’s schemes, his mother’s betrayal, Aegon’s threats, they all seemed to melt away as the distance grew between them. 
The sun was just beginning to rise as they spotted the shores of Ixtal. 
Warmth bloomed within her at the sight of her home, knowing she was only minutes from reuniting with her family. 
She felt jittery, anxious excitement taking over every inch of her as they landed on the shores. A slew of guards were already waiting for them on the shores, the dragons having been spotted in the distance and causing mayhem in fear of a potential attack. 
Among the pointed spears and swords, she spotted her father’s face. She breathed shakily, eagerly undoing the straps around her waist, charging down from Vhagar’s back despite Aemond’s protests. 
She didn’t care for safety, she didn’t care for decorum. She charged towards the group of guards who soon lowered their weapons at their leader’s cries for a cease. Her father pushed the guards out of his way, coming to the front of the blockade, the sight of her causing tears to brim in his eyes. 
Barely a second later, she was in his arms, the force of her embrace almost knocking him off his feet. 
“You’re here.” He breathed out, holding tightly to his beloved daughter with a force that could only be portrayed by that of a father with a heavy heart. “How are you here? I haven’t heard from you in weeks, we thought-”
His words stopped as he noticed Aemond’s presence over her shoulder. His brows furrowed at the sight of the young child in his arms, his confusion only furthered as Princess Helaena stepped forward, another child in her arms. 
“You brought an entourage?”
Her face turned serious, worrying him immediately.
“Father, we… we’re seeking refuge from King’s Landing. It’s no longer safe for us there.”
He looked at his daughter incredulously, sensing there would be a long story to come. He nodded stiffly, having trouble tearing his eyes away from his daughter, his little girl he had been fraught with worry over the past moons.
A yell of her name sounded, catching their attention. Her face smoothed out, her worry disappearing as a bright smile grew. 
“Mother!” She called out, racing past her father and the litany of guards still standing at attention to seek out her mother who had raced out of the palace at the sight of the dragons, her arms open and ready for her daughter. 
Aemond watched, an ease settling over him as he saw her smile again, that bright, wondrous sight that could only assure him he had done the right thing. 
The Lord of Ixtal stepped forward, sending a polite smile to Helaena and eyeing the children with a soft gaze.
“Come, you must be exhausted from your journey.” He motioned them forward, allowing Helaena to lead, hand in hand with her twins, the two men settling in a matching pace side by side. “I knew you were the right man for the job.”
Aemond looked at the man beside him questioningly. 
“I knew you would keep my daughter safe. I never had any doubt.”
The young prince seemed to deflate under the praise. The guilt that had been festering within him unfurled, overtaking him so powerfully, he stopped walking.
“I didn’t- there was… it was too close-”
“Aemond,” His father-by-law placed his hand on his shoulder, squeezing comfortingly. “You’re here. You brought her home, safe and sound.”
“But I couldn't-”
“You are one man. You cannot fight the entire world of enemies alone, especially not when they are your own family.”
Aemond’s eye widened, looking perplexed by his words. The Lord just smiled sadly and shook his head.
“I had my suspicions from the start. I knew they didn’t want you to marry her, I knew their ambitions would become too great.”
Aemond just nodded stiffly, the words getting caught in his throat, not yet able to voice just what his family, his own mother, had done. 
“You’re a good man, Aemond. I hope you’ll be happy here.” 
“I will be.” He spoke, his voice laced with conviction, as if there were no doubts in his mind about his life now that he was standing on the sandy beaches of Ixtal, his future no longer out of his own control.
They stepped into the palace, his eyes finding her immediately. Her mother left her daughter’s side, coming towards him, a tearful smile gracing her features. 
Before he could say a word, she wrapped him in a tight hug. 
“Thank you.” She whispered to him, the words and the affectionate gesture plucking at his weakest points. The affection of a mother, a caring and kind soul, reminding him of what he had just lost, what he had purposefully stepped away from.
But it had never been like this. Alicent had never held him this tight, he had never felt love from his mother in a single touch, not like he was now from a woman he had met only a handful of times before. 
“You three look like you have hiked through the seven hells and back. Why don’t you rest for a while longer, we can talk later.” Her mother suggested. 
Helaena was guided to her new chambers for her and the children, her smile wide, no trace of derision from her escape. She seemed all too happy to be back to the place she had fallen in love with in that first visit years ago.
Aemond let his wife lead him to her old childhood chambers. 
He stepped in, taking in a deep breath, letting the events of the night roll off his back. He looked at the dried flowers and childhood drawings that lined the walls, some hers, some her siblings that had been gifted to her years ago that she couldn’t bear to part with. 
Her sentimental heart never failed to warm his own. 
As he set their bags down, his gaze fell to the view of the horizon from the balcony, picturing the chaos that would be ensuing across the sea in King’s Landing as their absence was discovered. 
He thought of his mother and the state she would be in once she realized both he and Helaena were gone, her grandchildren safe from their clutches. 
He let out a shaking breath and barely a second later, arms were winding around his waist. He hummed a grateful sounding noise, placing a hand over her clasped ones at his front.
“What are you thinking about?”
“They’ll send search parties.” He mused, his mind beginning to conjure the many ways his brother and grandsire could ruin the peace they tried to find for themselves.
“My father will handle it.” She assured him. “Besides, no one would dare try to force Vhagar away from here.” 
He smiled, his eyes falling to his mighty dragon that was basking in the sun, her wings fluttering in the waves that crashed onto the shore, her rumbles of contentment echoing up to their room. He looked over his shoulder at his wife, the warm feeling in chest growing at the sight of her, the ease she now carried around her.
“Thank you.”
Her eyes softened, a small smile growing. “I think I should be saying that to you.”
He had a million things he wanted to say but no idea how to say them. So he settled for kissing her softly, hoping it conveyed every ounce of love and adoration he held for her, the thanks he wanted to bestow upon her for saving his life, for saving his sister and her children. 
He pulled away regretfully, letting his forehead rest against hers as he thought over how close he had come to losing her just hours ago, causing tears to brim in his eye.
“I’m sorry.” He choked out, emotion welling his throat yet again. 
Her brows furrowed, not used to seeing him break as he was now, as he did just hours ago. 
“I haven’t been a good husband.” 
“Aemond-”
“I haven’t.” He spoke again, interrupting her attempt to soothe him. “I didn’t listen, I thought I could fight against everything alone. I pushed you away and I hurt you.” 
She watched him carefully, noting the guilt that seemed to seep out of every inch of him. 
“I’ll spend the rest of my life making up for it all, I swear.” He whispered frantically, as if he was desperate for her to believe him, as if she had any doubt. 
“What happened?” She questioned again, looking at him worriedly, but he shook his head, pushing the thought of this mother, of that man choking on his own blood, from his mind. 
“Not yet.” He whispered again, not yet ready to reveal to her the threat on her life, not wanting to break the peace they’d finally found after months of such heart-breaking tension. 
She was in his arms, they were safe, his sister and her children were safe. That was all that mattered. 
He kissed her again, this time firmer, more sure of himself. After tumultuous weeks of grieving and then spite between them, they hadn’t been close like this in ages. It had been too long since he had made love to his sweet wife. 
She melted into him, the feel of his hands on her, his lips against hers so desperately, was enough to heal the wounds in her heart the war had caused. 
“You are so beautiful.” He whispered as he planted kisses down the slope of her neck. “You are so wonderful, so kind. You have the most perfect, golden heart.” 
He lavished praise as his hands untied the laces of her gown, his lips finding their place over her racing heart, the heart that had given him so much love, enough to heal a boy doomed from the start. 
They moved slowly, treasuring each gentle caress and loving kiss as they stripped themselves bare. The waking nightmares they had been faced with in King’s Landing melted into nothing but old memories in the wake of their embrace. 
For so long, after the attack and losing their child, she had felt so disconnected to her own body. Now, as Aemond kissed every inch of her, as his hands roamed the familiar curves of her body, she felt she was finally herself again. 
She had spent too long watching her husband succumb to who his family wanted him to be. It made her determined to remind him why she loved him, how much she cherished him. 
Her hand slithered down the strong planes of his chest, his breath hitching as it traveled lower and lower until she gently grasped his stiff length in her hand that twitched with desire under her touch. 
Breaths left him in desperate pants as she stroked him, her touch familiar yet so missed. He repressed a shiver as she quickened her pace, her eyes watching him intently, the sight of his pleasure a welcome reprieve to how tightly wound she’d seen him for months. 
He moaned and quickly grabbed her hand, stopping her motions. He would not spill too early, before he even had the chance to bring her pleasure. 
She squealed in surprise, her laugh ringing out in the room as he picked her up and eagerly carried her to the bed. Her delighted giggles continued as she fell back on the soft mattress below her, biting her lip and practically writhing at the heated look from the man above her. 
She reached up, taking his eye patch off and tossing it to the side, needing to see all of him.
Aemond wasted no time, he couldn’t go another second without her. He spread her legs and kneeled before her, his mouth devouring her with a fervor of a man starved, moaning at the delectable taste of her.
She cried out, her hand falling to his head, tangling her fingers in his hair, pulling with each deliberately devastating stroke of his tongue. 
Her body was powerless against him, a litany of praise falling past her lips without her knowledge, mindlessly calling out to him, divulging every ounce of her love for him, both cursing and acclaiming his tongue and his ability to render her completely mindless. 
He growled against her, the sound of his name spoken so breathlessly, so desperately, quickly becoming his undoing. He quickened his pace, his need to push her over the edge growing as his own desires did.
She almost screamed, her back arching as he added his fingers, curling them in just the way he knew would drive her crazy. 
Her hands twisted into the sheets below her, her legs beginning to quiver from their place over his shoulders as he worked her to the cusp of ecstasy. 
“Aemond!” She cried out as his wicked tongue and fingers brought her to a blinding peak. 
She panted heavily, her limbs still trembling from the force of her release, barely able to comprehend the heated kiss Aemond pressed to her lips, the taste of her on his tongue making her moan. 
The soft sound turned into another high pitched cry as he entered her slowly, a shuddering breath falling past his own lips as they joined for the first time in months. He stilled, needing a moment before he lost his composure completely. 
He gazed at her below him, his lone eye shining, the love he felt for her in that moment suddenly overwhelming. He ducked his head into the crook of her neck, squeezing his eye shut as her hand caressed through his hair, her soft lips brushing against his temple. 
“It’s alright.” She whispered. “I’m here. I won’t ever be parted from your side.” 
Her words, as if she knew exactly what had happened just hours ago, the attempt on her life on the orders of his own family, were the salve to the torment running through his head since he learned of the threat against her. 
He raised his head, kissing her firmly, his tongue tangling with hers, desperate for her touch, her taste, every inch of her. 
“No one will ever take you from me.” He spoke softly, though the air of determination surrounding his words did not go unnoticed, whether to reassure her or himself he wasn’t sure. 
His hips began to move rhythmically, thrusting in and out of her gently, as if it were their first time again. 
She sighed, her eyes fluttering closed. Her hands gripped onto his back, feeling his muscle ripple under his skin as he moved. 
She wrapped her legs around his waist, holding him tightly as he made love to her as if he were afraid to break her, afraid to cause her any more harm than what she had endured since the war started. 
“Aemond,” She breathed out, leaning upwards, her nose brushing against his as she brushed her lips against his. “I’m ok. You can go faster, I can take it.” 
His face twisted, memories of the night of the attack, of her screams and cries of agony, of how close she had been last night to succumbing to the war. The thoughts were torturous. 
“I can’t-” He choked out, his jaw clenching, his brows furrowed as if he were in pain himself. “I can’t hurt you.”
“You won’t. I know you would never.” She assured him, her hands cradling his face as she looked at him intently, pure trust and love echoing through her eyes. 
He exhaled loudly, allowing his pace to quicken slightly, the moan she let out like music to his ears, soothing every ounce of his worry. 
“I trust you.” She whispered and his resolve shattered completely in an instant. 
He whimpered and began to thrust into her harder, his movements becoming more assured, his hunger for her reaching its peak, his hips now crashing against hers purposefully, moans falling freely from his lips as she cried out at every hard thrust, his cock hitting that place inside her that made her writhe against him.
Her noises were beautiful, they sent shivers down his spine, made his head spin in that delightful way only she could give him. He never liked to feel as though he wasn’t in control, but with her he welcomed the feeling. 
She was the only one he felt safe around to let himself feel it. 
He gripped onto her thigh, hiking it higher on his hip, allowing him to reach deeper inside her, her name like a desperate prayer on his lips as he felt himself nearing his end. It had been too long and he was no match for her perfect body. 
He brought his hand down, his thumb brushing against her clit, desperate to bring her with him. It didn’t take long until she trembled against him, her nails digging into his back, her head thrown back against the sheets as she cried out loudly. 
The feeling of her tightening around him and the sight of her lost in pleasure beneath him undid him effortlessly. He gasped, his movements becoming more frantic in his end, frantic groans following with each of his movements. It hit him like a wave, crashing over him all at once. He cried out, a sound more desperate than she had ever heard from him, his body stiffening before falling lax as he came hard. 
His eye fell shut as the haze of pleasure overtook him. He breathed harshly, letting the aftershocks of bliss roll through his shaking limbs. Her hands brushing his hair out of his face brought him back into the present.  
His eye fluttered open, meeting the eyes of the woman below him, her easy, pleasure filled smile bringing one of his own.
He leaned down, kissing her softly. Silently vowing to himself that he would never let anything threaten her life again, not as long as he lived, that he would never bring her pain ever again. 
He held her tightly, breathing out a long, drawn out breath, expelling every bit of the bitter anger and betrayal that clung to him. 
As he lay beside her, his softening length still buried inside her, the blissful touch of her hand running through his hair, he listened to the waves outside the open balcony doors, the calls of seabirds reminding him of where he was, where he would spend the rest of his days with her by his side.
It brought him more peace than he ever could have imagined. 
~~
With Aemond’s absence, and subsequently Vhagar’s absence from the frontlines, the Greens quickly succumbed to the Blacks. 
She held tightly to Aemond’s hand as her father read outloud the letter sent from Rhaenyra who now sat the throne. He gave no reaction as he heard of Otto’s execution, of Aegon’s demise in the black cells. He barely twitched as he heard his mother was to be sequestered in the Red Keep, forced to live out the rest of her life in solitude. 
The only emotion he showed was the breath he let out when he heard Daeron was to remain in Oldtown, with strict orders never to return to King’s Landing. He was thankful his younger brother never played a role in the war, that his life was spared from a gruesome fate. 
Helaena looked forlorn, her eyes cast down to her hands that fidgeted in her lap. She left for a reason, she had escaped with her children, an act she would never regret, but it didn’t lessen the unease in her heart.
She always knew this was how it would end. 
The knowledge that Aegon would never touch her again was a shining ray of light in the storm of dark clouds that was the news of the demise of her family. 
They were dismissed quickly, her mother throwing her a wary look as Aemond practically sprinted from the room as if it were deprived of air he desperately needed. 
She walked at a slow pace, knowing he’d need a few minutes to himself to take in the news. Making her way through the gardens, she knew exactly where he’d be, where he often found himself in moments of deep thoughts and contemplation. 
She knew he didn’t regret leaving, but some days the decision was harder to swallow than others. 
Within a few minutes, she found him sitting on the bench in front of the billowing willow tree, the place they had first spoken, the place he had complimented her drawings, the place where she had made him laugh as if they were old friends rather than new acquaintances. 
He didn’t look up as she approached. 
The only indication he gave to her presence was the long breath he let out as she took a seat next to him. 
“I’m fine.” He spoke impatiently, as if to assure her so he could be left to his torturous solitude.
“You know I don’t believe that.” She admonished softly, making no move to leave. 
His foot tapped erratically against the stone below him, his teeth biting his bottom lip, his shoulders hunched, the very picture of discontent. Frowning, she placed her hand on his arm, sliding down the length of his tense muscles until she found his hand, intertwining their fingers.
“I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re feeling.”
“I can’t quite make sense of it myself.” He admitted quietly.
“I know you’re not happy Rhaenyra is on the throne-”
“I don’t care about that.” He spoke abruptly, his tone becoming sharp. “Our lives would have been much easier if that damned chair didn’t exist.”
She knew since coming to Ixtal, after the month of peace they’d had without his family breathing down his neck, forcing his every move, he could breathe easier. But it was still his family, his own brother and grandsire who had perished in the war. 
“Aemond,” She began softly. “Talk to me, please.”
“I know what my brother was. I won’t pretend to mourn him.” 
“You do not have to.” 
His eyes held a vacant look, as he retreated into the mess of thoughts in his head. He knew what his grandsire had done, the game he had played long before he had even been born. He knew the retribution Otto faced was well deserved. 
It didn’t cause him much grief. 
It was the thought of his mother that left his insides twisting in a way he hadn’t anticipated. 
“It doesn’t seem like enough.” He whispered, his words almost lost to the wind. 
“What doesn’t?”
“She tried to take you from me yet she lives.” 
Her breath caught in her throat. She had never had a close bond with Aemond’s mother but after she had been told what had happened that fateful night they left, what caused her husband’s tears, her view of Alicent had been forever changed. 
Aemond held tightly to her hand, as if saying the words aloud were too much to handle. 
He let out a shaking breath, pinching the bridge of his nose, he could feel a headache coming on, one that was all too familiar when it came to the derision his family caused him. 
“It does not seem a fitting punishment yet I’m… relieved. I don’t think I truly want her dead.”
Aemond didn’t know what to make of what he felt for his mother. He was angered she still drew breath yet relieved she hadn’t been killed brutally by Rhaenyra, yet he still couldn’t stomach the thought of her, not after what she’d done. 
“Of course you don’t. No matter what she’s done, she’s still your mother.” 
He thinks to himself that he doesn’t deserve her, this wonderful woman in front of him, the only one to truly see him. 
When he lies with his wife, when he sees her beautiful smile, when he feels her touch on his skin, he thinks he’d be content if his mother never saw the light of day again, yet deep down, the guilt festers. 
He was the reason their side lost. His departure was the sole reason Aegon and Otto are dead, the reason his mother is confined for the rest of her days. 
He can’t find himself regretting his actions, knowing the outcomes, yet he can’t help but feel as though he had failed his family. 
The sense of duty they had instilled in him was screaming, raging at him for what he had done. But he wasn’t that man they raised him to be. 
He was the man who fell in love with his best friend. He was the man who finally felt love as a child from a girl who tried endlessly to get him to see the beauty in himself and the world around him. 
The part of him that felt guilty for his mother was soon crushed out by the love he held for his wife. When he looked at her, he realized no one had ever truly cared for him but her. No one had ever had his best interest at heart except her. 
He squeezed her hand in his, finally letting his gaze reach hers, the concern in her eyes melting a part of him that desperately needed to be melted. 
“I don’t regret a single moment with you.” He tells her, the look in his eye now soft, no longer shrouded in agony and confusion. 
She smiles softly, still worried for him, worried for what the news would cause him. 
“Aemond-”
“I just want to think about our future.” He interrupted, knowing exactly what fears lay on her tongue, fearing much of the same for himself. 
But he would cross that bridge when he came to it. He would feel the moments of guilt, of relief, of whatever other emotion his family would cause him, as they came. 
He didn’t fear what he would feel because he knew the woman he loved would be there to soothe him in every one of those dark moments. His family, though they may try, couldn’t hurt him anymore.
“I want to raise our children here, where they won’t know any pressures of the court or successions, of war or conflict.” 
“Are you sure you don’t-”
“Protecting you was and will always be my number one priority.” He assured her before she could even voice her question about his regret. 
Her smile was much more genuine, his words soothing the anxiety she felt at his reaction. He felt himself smile at the sight before him, eased merely by her presence.
He leaned in, kissing her softly, letting his forehead rest against hers.
“You were always my purpose.” 
His whispered words were assurances they both clung to in the face of uncertainty. 
Tension would always exist as long as their enemy sat on the throne, but they were content, miles away, across the sea where their love flourished, where they would start their family.
No one would take that away from them.
~~
A year had passed peacefully. No further word from King’s Landing came. Helaena and her children thrived in the beauty that was Ixtal. The eccentric Princess made many friends with the ladies in court, finally feeling as though she could be herself without judgment, without fearing retribution or gossip. She no longer felt the pressure to be the perfect image of a Targaryen Princess. 
Aemond had quickly found his place alongside her younger brother in leading the city watch. He melded into his new life with an ease she hadn’t expected. 
Her own father accepted Aemond into their council, his voice soon becoming a valuable and respected asset to the island and its governance with most of the realm. 
Their new life was everything they wanted. 
Until the day their past caught up to them. 
“My Lady?” She looked up to notice her guard approaching, a nervous expression painting his features. “A dragon has been spotted approaching our shores. Shall I request your husband?”
Her face was drawn tightly and she shook her head brusquely. She knew exactly who would be accosting them.
“No, I will handle it.” 
She walked determinedly to the throne room, her guard following behind her worriedly.
“Where is my father?”
“In a council meeting.”
“And my husband is with him?”
“Yes, my Lady.” 
“Good.” She breathed out. She didn’t need either of them catching wind of their guest’s arrival and causing a stir. “You are dismissed.” She spoke to her guard whose eyes widened at the command, his mouth opening to refuse, but she gave him a pointed look.
“I can handle this, Ser Jerrod.” 
The guard sighed defeatedly and gave her a look of resignation.
“I am telling your husband of your orders when he comes to punish me.” 
Aemond had developed quite the reputation of being protective of his wife, the guards were terrified to obey her orders when they knew they would face the ire of her dragon husband. 
“I will take the blame, I promise you.” She assured him with a smirk. 
As her guard left, leaving her alone in the throne room, she let out a long breath, her heart racing as she prepared herself for what she would soon face. 
Only minutes later, the great doors opened and Queen Rhaenyra entered, her face hardened, bitter anger in her eyes. 
Her steps faltered, her powerful pace slowing as she met the eyes of the person she had least expected. 
Rhaenyra spoke her name slowly, her entire demeanor changed, abruptly thrown off from her course of murderous rage that darkened her thoughts, that prompted her abrupt arrival. 
She breathed deeply, straightening her posture as she steeled her expression, putting on the mask of anger back into place.
“I’m sure you know why I am here.”
“I do.” She answered Rhaenyra cooly, her posture relaxed, an exact contrast from the woman before her who looked as though she was unraveling. 
The dark circles under her eyes did not go unnoticed. 
“I need to see Aemond.”
“That’s not going to happen, Rhaenyra, you know that.”
“He needs to pay for what he did.” The woman spoke through gritted teeth, angry tears filling her eyes. 
She stared at the woman, the Queen, before her for a few long seconds, taking in her state of weariness with a heavy sigh, which only seemed to upset Rhaenyra further, her face turning red, her jaw clenching as she took a mighty step towards her.
“He killed my son!”
“And you killed mine!” She yelled back, matching her with the ferocity only a devastated mother could have. 
The reminder of what Rhaenyra agreed to, what she allowed Daemon to do, made her face crumble, her eyes falling to the floor, refusing to meet the gaze of the woman in front of her, the woman she had made lose everything. 
She never wished the loss of a child on any woman, yet here she was, standing face to face with the woman with whom she had directly caused the greatest sorrow. 
“Gods, Rhaenyra, do you think yourself innocent, do you think you are absolved of punishment from your place in this war?”
“I know I am not.” She choked out, her voice barely above a whisper. “But I did not start this. Your husband must pay for what he has done.”
“My husband does not hold this blame alone. This war would’ve happened no matter who laid the first blow, you know that.”
“They usurped my crown!”
“Yet you sit on the throne and the only reason you do is because Aemond chose to step down from the fight.” 
Rhaenyra’s jaw tightened, the fury in her eyes taking over her grief. 
“You did not come here to wager about succession.”
“No, I came to kill my brother.” Rhaenyra stated simply, her glare deepening when the woman in front of her scoffed.
“Aemond is under Ixtal’s protection. He has no governance under the crown.”
“Your father is an honorable man, he will do what is right-”
Her sarcastic laugh stopped Rhaenyra mid sentence, the older woman scowling at the young woman before her with blooming hatred.
“My father does not know all the details about what happened that night in King’s Landing, why I was attacked, how I lost my baby. If he knew it was you and Daemon that orchestrated it, that you were the reason he lost his grandchild, no force in this realm could save you.” She threatened, delighting in the way Rhaenyra shrunk under her pointed words. 
“Your position is tentative, Rhaenyra. Most of the realm despises you, especially after this senseless war. The smallfolk in King’s Landing are starving, the Lords of great houses are fed up with your trade arrangements, raising taxes, abandoning treaties.” She started, her voice low with animosity that steadily grew with each passing second she stood before her.
Rhaenyra looked surprised by what she knew, the details that hounded her night after night, the reason she was berated practically daily in court by smallfolk and Lords alike. 
“Most leaders in this realm hate you, you have little support anymore. If my father were to break tradition and take a stand against your position, how many houses do you think would remain loyal to you?”
Rhaenyra remained silent, her face twisted with disdain, mostly because she knew she had no argument. 
“If you threaten my husband, if you plan some heinous attack on his life, if you darken Ixtal with your presence again, I will tell my father the role you played in my attack and nothing will stop him from marching to the gates of King’s Landing, with the support of the entire realm behind him.” She warned darkly. “Don’t forget, we’re the reason you still have food on your plates. You shouldn’t bite the hand that feeds you.”
“Who do you think you are to threaten me? I am your Queen.” Rhaenyra raged, losing what little control she had left. 
“You think you can threaten me?” She countered. “That’s what you came here for, wasn’t it? To exert what little power you have left to boost your ego, to enact revenge for a bitter fight you caused.”
Rhaenyra flinched, her face twisted with derision at her words.
“Don’t pretend you have no role in this, Rhaenyra, you are smarter than that.” She added before the queen could speak another senseless word. “You pretended some measly words against your sons were more dire than a child who lost an eye. You added fire to an already growing inferno and you think they would, what? Live in peace?”
Rhaenyra gazed past her, refusing to look her in the eye. 
“I am truly sorry about what happened to Lucerys.”
“Don’t say his name.” Rhaenyra seethed.
“A son for a son, that was what you wanted, wasn’t it?” 
Rhaenyra flinched, swallowing harshly against the lump in her throat, the guilt she still felt for her role in such a violent act drowning her, especially now as she faced the woman she hurt directly. 
“You got what you wanted, so consider us even.” She choked out through her own growing emotions, the memory of that night still haunting her. “Now leave.”
She watched, feeling victorious as Rhaenyra bowed her head, unable to look at her, as she turned on her heel and began to walk to the door in defeat.
“You may sit on that throne but it is my house that holds the power.” She called out before she could leave the room. “Remember that next time you get the urge to visit again.”
The door closed behind the Queen and she let out a long breath, feeling as though a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, having spoken to the reason for her attack for the first time, having expelled her anger towards the woman who had caused her greatest loss. 
She let her shoulders relax, suddenly realizing how tense her entire body had become. She turned on her heel and stopped abruptly as she noticed Aemond in the doorway across the room.
His face was passive, she couldn’t read a single emotion on his face. Even after all their time together, she still had trouble reading him in moments when he was guarded. 
“How long have you been here?”
“Long enough.” He answered vaguely. A moment passed before he let a small smile grow and she breathed out, laughing slightly as she approached him. “I quite like seeing that side of you.”
“You are not mad?”
“Mad?” He asked in disbelief and laughed. “No, I think you handled that with much more grace than I ever could.” 
He held his hand out to her as she came before him, taking her hand in his and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. 
“In fact, seeing you defend me as valiantly as you did was quite… stirring.” 
She rolled her eyes and pushed at his chest.
“Aemond.” She admonished. “This is serious.”
“It is and you handled yourself as if you’ve been ruling for years.”
She sighed in annoyance, the praise not having the effect she expected. She felt as though he was avoiding the seriousness of what happened, or how wrong things could have turned out. 
“Your sister arrived to kill you and all you can do is compliment me?” 
Aemond’s smile faltered, his demeanor changing in an instant, the cool air around him gone.
“I have to live with what I did… to Lucerys.” He admitted quietly. “She must live with what she did. It’s like you said, we are even.” 
She intertwined their fingers, her hand squeezing his in a silent show of comfort. She knew he still felt immense guilt about what had happened that night, for what she endured as a result of it. 
He still had nights when he couldn’t face it. 
“Do you think she will retaliate?” She asked quietly and Aemond shook his head, clearing his throat and the air of intensity surrounding him as his easy smile returned. 
“Not unless she wants another verbal lashing from you.”
She scoffed and looked at her husband plainly. He pulled her towards him, a serious look in his eye even as his smirk remained. 
“If she ever dares to return, she will have to face Vhagar.” He told her. “I would never let her hurt you or anyone on this Island.”
She breathed out in relief. She didn’t want it to ever come to that, but to hear it so plainly, the lengths Aemond would go to protect her, to protect her family and their home, was a strange comfort. 
He kissed her forehead and looked at her with a gaze full of nothing but love, the words she had said to Rhaenyra in his defense running around his head. He would not soon forget it, the way she stood up for him. 
Her name was called from across the hall, breaking the moment between them. 
They turned to see her younger sister approaching, their smiles widening as they saw the bundle she carried in her arms.
“Sorry to interrupt, but she was getting fussy. I think she’s missing you two.” 
Aemond met her halfway, his arms already outstretched to take his daughter from his good sister. He whispered his thanks, his gaze locked onto the babe in his arms, his precious girl. 
At only 3 moons old, she was the greatest light in his life, aside from her mother of course. She had him wrapped around her little finger the second she took her first breath.
“Thank you for looking after her.” She told her sister and stood by Aemond’s side, latching onto his arm as they both gazed down at their child. 
“Is everything ok? I heard there was a dragon spotted.” Her sister inquired.
She looked over at Aemond, but he seemed too engrossed in their daughter to have even heard the question. 
“Everything’s fine. There’s nothing to worry about, she won’t be coming back.” She assured her sister who nodded and quickly made her exit, sensing the couple wanted to be alone with their little family.
Together, they walked out of the palace and through the gardens, coming to the familiar bench by the willow tree. 
Aemond sat, sparsely taking his eyes off his daughter. Next to him, his wife laughed, continually amused at how effortlessly their daughter mesmerized him. 
She leaned her head on his shoulder and reached out, gently tracing her finger over her daughter’s chubby cheeks that grinned at her touch, making a noise of contentment as she wriggled in her father’s arms. 
Aemond placed a kiss to her forehead and she raised her head, meeting his gaze. 
Their smiles grew at the same time, the same thought running through their minds. They had made it.
Whispered promises made in the beginning of their love had finally come true. 
They had their family and nothing could take it from them. 
~~
Thank you all for reading and coming with me and this wild ride! All of your comments have meant the absolute world to me and I'm just so happy I got to share this with you all xx
There will be an epilogue so this will not be the end of Aemond and his Sun xx
~~
Tag List:
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So sorry if I forgot to tag you!
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lolahauri · 5 months
Text
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ It's Your Sex I Can Smell
Ship: Ticci Toby/Reader
Type: GN/M, Explicit Smut, Part 1/3. (MDNI)
Contains: Invasion of Privacy, Masturbation, Scent Kink, Panty Raid, Underwear Kink, No Sex (yet).
Words: 1.6k
Part 2 (F/M Ver.): Here. Part 2 (M/M Ver.): Coming Soon
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A/N: Finally finished Toby's dirty secret fic! Sorry it took like two months damn!! I swear part two will come out way sooner than that. 0-0
You walked out of your room in a hurry, quickly fixing your hair and sweatshirt. You only had a couple hours left in the day to sneak into town and grab some essentials for the house. You felt bad leaving Toby home alone, but you needed to be quick and undistracted, you hoped he’d be fine staying to help clean up a bit before Masky and Hoodie returned the next morning.
Walking down the hall and towards the door, you spotted him sitting at the table, finishing his lunch. You walked behind him, wrapping your arms around his neck and leaning down to his ear, “Hey Tobes, I gotta run some errands before the shops in town close. I’ll be back in a couple hours, m'kay?”
Toby simply hummed and nodded in response, you couldn’t tell from behind, but a nervous blush was spreading across his face. You smiled and turned to kiss his cheek before pulling away from his body entirely, making sure to say goodbye one more time as you headed out the door. He hated to admit it, but the simple action of a hug and kiss on the cheek from you had his blood running straight to his cock. 
It made him feel like such a loser, but he couldn’t help it. You’re just so fucking cute and sweet and affectionate with him, how could he not be a total simp for you? The hardness in his cock steadily grew, creating an uncomfortable tightness in the crotch of his pants. He tried to ignore it, he really did. But today he just couldn’t stop thinking about your beautiful body and hypnotizing voice. 
His mind was absolutely racing with dirty fantasies. Ranging from being on his knees and going down on you, to fucking you from behind like an animal in heat and being drowned in your moans. His cock was throbbing painfully now, it was getting unbearably hard to fight now. But, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to jerk off right? He was home alone now. You wouldn’t be back for at least 3 or 4 hours, and the other two were gone till tomorrow morning. There was total privacy. 
Toby leaned back in his chair, pushing his hips up to shift to a more comfortable position. He ran his hand over the bulge in his jeans, sighing from the small bit of relief. Throwing his head back, he continued to tease himself through his clothes, pretending it was your hand rubbing and grabbing on his hard cock. He slowly unzipped his pants, pulling them and his boxers down at an agonizingly slow rate. He wanted this to last as long as possible, not knowing the next time he’d have this sort of isolation again. 
As his cock was finally being released, Toby noticed something from the corner of his eye, it was your favorite hoodie hanging on the chair next to him. You must’ve forgotten to put it in the wash today. 
And just as he realized that, an idea sprung into his mind. Without thinking on it too much longer, he reached over, grabbing it and bringing it to his face. He took a deep inhale as he buried his nose in the cloth. Fuck, it still smelled just like you . 
It was an intoxicating mix of your natural scent, signature fragrance, and just a hint of sweat. Unconsciously, he ran his free hand back down to his crotch, grabbing it at the base and slowly beginning to stroke upwards, face still nuzzled into your hoodie. He groaned at the sensation, suddenly becoming aware of his body, and just how fucking horny he was. 
Toby started off with a slow, teasing pace. Steadily move his hand up and back down again, occasionally swiping his thumb across the tip, smearing his precum and using it as lube. His breathing was starting to get heavy, completely lost in pleasure as his continued to fantasize about you. He imagined you were still wearing this sweater, sitting in his lap and bouncing on his cock like a whore. He imagined how pretty you’d look in that state, sweat droplets building up on your face, mouth parted and flowing with whimpers and moans, hair messy and sticking to your forehead. 
Just thinking about how fucking good it would feel to completely stuff you with his cum nearly made him lose it right then and here. He’d give anything to watch it drip down your thighs and lick them clean right afterwards. 
He was beating his cock at a hard, fast rate now, high pitched moans escaping his throat and being absorbed by your clothing. He was getting dizzy from your scent now, a cloud of lust fogging his mind completely. Something this weird should not be feeling so good right now. 
But soon, he began to slow himself down to a complete halt. Toby lazily stuffed his cock back into his pants as he pulled them up a bit. Another idea was coming to him, a very, very stupid one. But he wasn’t thinking clearly, that much was obvious as he stood up and stumbled down the hall to your room.
What he was thinking to himself was simple, if you hadn’t put your favorite, most used sweatshirt in the wash already, then surely the rest of your used clothes must be untouched too? Which would mean your used underwear would be available, free to use as a replacement for your hoodie. Yes, it would be gross, and it would be a complete invasion of privacy... but if you never found out, it couldn’t hurt, right? 
Normally he wouldn’t even consider doing something like this to you, you’re his best friend. And yes, he was madly in love with you, but he also didn’t want to risk what you two already had, and it goes without saying, this could easily ruin what you two have.
He wasn’t in the right headspace to think that rationally though, he just couldn’t deny anymore that he’d always secretly dreamed of doing this. And if he couldn’t have you… maybe this would suffice… 
Toby carefully turned the knob of your door, testing to see if it was locked or not. Of course it wasn’t, you had no reason to do so, nobody ever went into your room anyway. Well, not that you were aware of at least.
He swiftly pushed through the entrance of your room and began to scan your room for a laundry basket. Sweet , it was right by your bed. Without even bothering to close the door behind him, he walked straight to the basket, shuffling through your clothes and looking for the first pair underwear he could find. 
“Fuck…” he muttered under his breathe as he lifted your underwear out of the pile. They were cute, and soft. The hardness in his pants twitched and throbbed at the sight, feeling a rush of anxiety and arousal course through his entire body. His hands were lightly trembling as he brought the used garment to his face, still clutching onto your hoodie as if you were still in it. 
Toby took a deep inhale, closing his eyes halfway and groaning. The scent was fresh and intoxicatingly musky, you must’ve just changed out of them before you left . Not wanting to waste any more time, he stood up from his kneeling position on the floor and crawled into your bed. He laid his head back onto your pillows and quickly took his cock out again. He immediately got to work, jerking himself off at a harsh, vigorous pace, twitching with every jolt of electricity being sent through his veins. 
His mouth and nose were fully covered by your underwear as he breathed in it’s scent. Savoring it like a fine wine, feeling almost drunk off of you when you weren’t even in the home. God, he wishes so badly he could have you sitting on his face right now. He wants you to use him, shame him, make him feel like the disgusting pervert he is. 
He sticks his tongue out to taste you on the clothing, letting out a pathetic whine right away. His back arches off of the bed as he repeatedly licks the fabric. He can feel himself getting close. No matter how hard he tries to edge himself, he can feel the pressure build up inside. 
Before he gets too close though, he hurriedly moves the panties to wrap them around his throbbing cock. He bites his lip so hard his teeth are threatening to break skin, watching himself use your underwear like a fleshlight. The soft, warm fabric was hugging his cock so nicely he just couldn’t hold back anymore. 
The pressure that had been building in his lower abdomen finally reached it’s breaking point. His muscles tensed momentarily before his orgasm began to erupt. He whimpered and moaned out loud as his body twitched and spasmed under his hand. A wave of ecstasy crashed over him so hard he nearly screamed. 
He stroked his cock one, two, three, four more times before he stopped. His breathing was labored and heavy as he tried to calm down. He soon felt the post-climax exhaustion hit him. His eyes half-lidded as he slowly went to remove the cum stained underwear from his lap, but he couldn’t get too far with the clean up before he was interrupted. 
“Having fun Toby? God, you're so fucking pathetic.” A loud voice said from the doorway, making him instantly wake up. Adrenaline coursed through every nerve and vein in his body, heart immediately racing. 
This can’t be fucking happening right now…
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livelovecucumber · 2 months
Text
BRUTALLY HONEST effects of hitting my UGW of 45 kg / 100 lbs
So as I’ve mentioned on my blog, I hit my ugw of 45kg in 2020 and since been in recovery (recently rel4psed) and wanted to list some effects of being underw3ight that I noticed.
1. Food allergies. I got sensitive to several foods and drinks while being underweight. Some of them I can consume again after years of recovery. These include: Extreme sensitivity to caffeine & coffee (feel like i’m sick, still can’t consume it and it used to be my fave). Sensitivity to raw vegetables. Lactose intolerance.
2. Heart problems. I have unexplained heart problems since being underweight. I will get suddenly get an abnormally high bpm (200+) while resting at completely random times. This is scary and extremely painful. It hurts in my entire body, feel like I can’t breathe and my jaw hurts. Can last for 5-45 min and will leave me unable to do anything in that time period. Will leave me tired for 2-3 days. Has been happening less in the last year of recovery. Not anxiety related.
3. Memory loss. I would completely forget my sentence in the middle of it. I would forget the entire day and every small detail. Been experiencing both long term and short term memory loss since being underweight. Still struggling with retaining information.
4. Speech problems. Probably related to memory loss. I spoke extremely slow and struggled with forming sentences, and I still do. I struggle with remembering words and will sometimes take a while to form a coherent sentence.
5. Less picky. Incredibly enough, I have become way less picky since being underweight as starving made me desire ANY food available. This has made me appreciate every small taste. Great for learning to eat less desirable “healthy” foods.
6. Loss of good judgement. When I was underweight I had little to no self reflection in my actions. I had my values and morals but the lines seemed to blur as my ability to think properly depleted and I started acting more unconsciously attention seeking and egocentric, without my knowledge. This was in all aspects of my life. I thought I was in complete control but regained common knowledge as soon as I recovered.
7. Constipation. When at my lowest weight, I was constantly constipated and bloated. Laxatives did not work.
8. People acted differently. People treated me completely differently and started treating me like a child and as if I was stupid. They also gave me more compliments and were nicer to me in general. I noticed other girls felt more awkward around me compared to when I was heavier.
9. Mood swings. No shocker but being underweight made my mood swing a lot. I would cry over nothing and act out incredibly when things didn’t turn out. I also acted more kind and timid towards others in general than I used to. I was more careful with hurting others and more sensitive and empathetic in general.
10. Hair growth. I didn’t really notice my hair growing faster on my body but my hair on my head got a lot longer.
Honorable mentions: Constant unexplained bruising, constant cold feeling, feeling sick almost every day, childish behaviour in general, didn’t feel mature and indulged in very childish hobbies & likes. Dumbed myself down on purpose a lot due to memory loss & speech issues.
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lyjen · 5 months
Text
Drowning
Summary: Evan’s wife is an Elementary school teacher, but when a shooter enters the school and starts shooting at teachers, (Y/n) is the first person to help. Evan gets worried as his wife doesn’t pick up her phone, but as soon as the shooting reaches the news Evan is desperate to find out where she is.
Request by: anonymous - The request
9-1-1 masterlist
Taglist: @oliviah-25 @shauna-carsley
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______
“So I want you to both be thinking about it. Put those two brains together, I want you to solve it and be able to explain how you solved it” (Y/n) finished her math instruction. “I’m going to give you two minutes to try and solve this question, you’re ready?” Her voice sounded through the classroom as she clicked on start on the timer which was displayed on the screen.
(Y/n) was an elementary school teacher, she teaches the fifth grade to be specific. She has her own classroom, a teacher assistant intern, and a really good bond with her students. She loves her job, she really does. There’s nothing in the world she’d rather be doing than working with children. Her husband, on the other hand, loved being a firefighter. It was his life, and in his words: he wouldn’t know where he’d be if he never started the fire academy.
When one of the kids asked her if she had a boyfriend, she told them she was married to a firefighter. The students were so enthusiastic and full of questions, so she decided to take the kids to the firehouse one day, to teach them about firefighters, dispatch and everything Bobby had to tell.
“Okay, so some of you came up with an answer and a solution.” She speaks to the group as she holds up her hand, motioning to the kids who were ready to throw their answer to her head, to hold up their hands. “Do we have a volunteer to tell us what answer they got and how they got it?” multiple hands had gone up into the air, but those hands quickly were put down when loud screams sounded through the hallways.
But it was the gunshot that went off after that which caught her attention the most. Her eyes shot towards her teacher assistant Katy, who was sitting at the desk grading some homework as she immediately dropped the pen. Katy’s eyes went wide when she realized what was happening while multiple gasps from the students filled the silence in the room.The gunshot sent a shiver down (Y/n)’s whole body, as she remembered the three words: Run, hide, fight.
That was the protocol. Run if you can, hide if you can not evacuate safely and fight if your life is in danger.
“Everyone. Hide underneath your desks” She said softly as she tried to stay as calm as she possibly could.
The students all get off their seats and follow their teachers instructions as Katy runs off to the windows and closes the blinds. Meanwhile (Y/n) gets the remote for the screen and quickly shuts it off and runs towards the lightswitch to turn it off.
“Katy, help me move this” she says as she tries to push a mid-high bookcase in front of the door to barricade it. Katy quickly moves towards (Y/n) and helps her move the cabinet, so no one would be able to get in or out of the classroom.
When the cabinet was on the right spot, (Y/n) made her way towards the kids to make sure they were okay.
“You’re okay, we’re going to be fine” (Y/n) whispered softly to one of the students who was having a breakdown. She took place on the ground and folded her legs over each other, and she rubbed her hands over the kid’s upper arm, as a sign that she was there. They were not alone.
She let her fingers wipe away the tears of the girl’s cheeks and tried to hush her. She didn’t want to draw any attention. The girl almost started hyperventilating because she was that scared. “Amelia I need you to take slow deep breaths” (Y/n) whispered almost inaudibly. The girl nodded her head as she tried to copy her teacher’s breathing pattern. “Good, through your nose and out through the mouth” (Y/n) complimented her.
Huddled up with some kids to her side, (Y/n) tried her best to calm down the kids who were having a hard time to deal with the situation. Students around her were silently crying, while they were comforting themselves and each other.
There was an ear deafening silence floating through the classroom. They could practically hear the clock on the wall, ticking after each minute that had gone by.
With every footstep she heard on the hallway outside of the classroom, (Y/n)’s heart would skip a beat. There could be children running for their lives, other teachers or the shooter choosing their next victim.
After minutes, maybe even an hour of sitting in silence, a high pitched yelp sounds through the walls of her classroom. But that scream gets cut off by a sudden gunshot. More gasps and sobs sound softly through the classroom. With wide eyes (Y/n) tries to focus on the sound of the hallway.
“No. No, what are you going to do?!” Katy’s voice whispered desperately as (Y/n) crouched down and made her way towards the door of her classroom. The assistant crawled her way towards (Y/n), who was down at the door. Looking through the little gap between the window of the door and the bookcase.
(Y/n) glances through the window and spots a fellow teacher, down on the ground while a puddle of blood is being created underneath her. “Don’t be a hero” Katy says as softly as she possibly could.
She turned her head at Katy, “She’s hurt and needs help, I can’t just leave her to..” she shrugged her shoulders, she couldn’t say die. Not with her kids around, not when they were already traumatized enough by the sounds “You know..” she continued as she shrugged her shoulders.
She couldn’t do nothing. That was not who she was.
“But the shooter is still out there.” Katy says as she desperately starts to look around her. “That’s why I need you to stay here and keep them safe” (Y/n) whispered as she pointed out at her class. Katy shook her head with a frightened look in her eyes “No.. I can’t do that” Katy sighed as she looked at the kids.
“It wasn’t a question Katy, stay here and keep them safe. Close the door behind me” She repeated one more time as she looked at her over the shoulder.
With both her hands she moved the bookcase on one end a little backwards so she was able to squeeze through the gap of the door. Her hand reached for the lever of the door, as she as silently as possible pulled the lever down and squeezed her body through the door. (Y/n) could hear the door close behind her.
Still crouching, she made her way towards her colleague and let her knees drop to the ground when she reached her. “You’re gonna be okay” she said, barely inaudible as she made eye contact with her. The teacher had lost a lot of blood, the puddle was becoming bigger with the second.
The female teacher had been shot in the chest. (Y/n) went with her first instinct, putting pressure on the wound. Without thinking, she pressed her bare hands onto the chest of the woman. The woman winced and hissed at the pain that was being pushed onto her gunshot wound. “I know it hurts, but you have to stay with me okay?” (Y/n) said as her eyes wandered from the wound to the woman’s eyes.
She was on the edge of passing out. (Y/n) could tell. The woman was blinking so fast, and she looked exhausted. “Shit” (Y/n) cursed as the eyes of the woman rolled to the back of her head. Quickly she pressed two fingers of her right hand into the skin of the neck to see if she had a pulse.
Her heart was still beating, which meant she just had to put pressure onto the wound. So the heart would have enough blood to pump around.
But then the feeling of a cold metal getting pressed onto her skin spreads a shiver down her entire body. Her mouth suddenly went dry and her heart was pounding in her chest, as if it was trying to break free from her chest.
(Y/n) was frozen in her position, hovering over the woman. Putting pressure to the wound which was still trying to bleed through the small gaps between her fingers..
“Let go” the sound of a low male voice said.
She swallowed, as she felt the metal being pushed, deeper into her skin. She slightly shook her head, “You don’t have to do this” she slowly said as she kept as still as possible. “I do, everyone in this building has to pay for what they did for me.”
A click sounded. He reloaded his gun. Just one click away from a bullet inside of her head.
“I get it.” her voice said as she felt her breathing become faster because of the adrenaline. “When they don’t see you. And no one is there to help.” She squeezed her eyes closed at the pressure of the gun that was being pushed into the side of her forehead.
“Shut. Up.” His voice hissed at (Y/n).
Tears were falling down her face as she tried to keep enough pressure on the wound of the woman. “Struggling every single day of your life, trying to find a reason to be here”
“I said shut up!” he yelled as he fired a warning shot into the concrete walls of the hallway.
She flinched at the sudden gunshot. But she didn’t stop. She didn’t give up. She needed to try, and enter his mind. Try to talk him out of it, or buy herself more time. “The bucket will fill itself with more and more water everyday. And one day, that bucket will overflow.” She tried to remain strong as her voice became more trembling by every word she spoke.
The man pushes the gun once again into her skin, the muzzle still a little warm because of the bullet that popped out a few seconds ago. A click sounds as he reloads another bullet. “And you’ll realize that you’ve been drowning.. and if there’s no one to reach out their hand...” she squeezed her eyes shut as she remained silent for a second and another tear escaped the corner of her eye.
Multiple gunshots sounded through the hallway of the school as the gun, which the shooter was holding against her head fell down to the ground together with the body of the shooter.
A gasp left her mouth as the bullets whooshed along her ears. She glanced over her shoulder and saw the body of the shooter lying behind her on his back. Lifeless.
Everything that was happening was moving in slow motion. When she looked in front of her she could see multiple swat soldiers entering the hallway with their guns pointed towards the man behind her.
“Suspect is down” one of the soldiers said into their radio’s as they made their way towards (Y/n) and the shooter.
With two paramedics following the soldiers, the paramedics kneeled down next to the female teacher which (Y/n) tried to save her life. The paramedics put down their medic bags beside them and zipped the bag open as they grabbed some gauze.
“You can let go now. We’ve got her.” the male paramedic said as he tried to get her attention by putting his hand onto her shoulder. (Y/n) was still in shock. How did she survive this? Why didn’t he just shoot her when he had the chance? Why listen to her words?
“Sorry” she said as she got back to earth. She slowly retreated her hands back to her own body as the paramedic quickly pressed the gauze down onto the wound. (Y/n) slightly flinched as she felt a hand curling around her bicep, pulling her up to her feet and escorting her down the hall to the open world. She let them. She was too shaken up to try and fight or ask questions.
______
“Hi this is (Y/n)’s phone, please leave a message after the tone!” Her voice sounded through the speaker of Evan’s phone as he ended the call before the tone could ring into his ear.
A sigh leaves Evan’s mouth as he continues to send her a text, asking her to call him back when she can.
Hen walks into the kitchen when a frown morphed onto her face. “Hey you okay?” She asked when she noticed Evan’s slightly worried face that was focussed on his phone.
Evan clicks on the send button as he slips his phone back into his pocket, and he curls his fingers around the glass of water he had made.
“I’m fine..” he sighs as he leans with his forearms onto the kitchen counter. “I have just tried to call (Y/n) multiple times but she doesn’t answer. Normally she would’ve called me back by now”
They called everyday, especially when Evan was on shift. She would call him after school had come to an end and all kids had left the classroom.
“You think I’m crazy, don’t you?” Evan laughed at himself as he shook his head. He sounded like he was going insane. As if he couldn’t live without her. But it was a routine, so when that routine gets interrupted, it feels weird.
Normally Evan was the one to not pick up, when he was on a call. But he always called her back when they were back at the firehouse. Sometimes it could take hours, but it could also be minutes. It depended on the call of course.
“No not at all.. I’m sure she will call you back, maybe she’s talking to a parent or she’s just busy.” Hen touches Evan’s upper arm as she tries to reassure him that his wife is okay.
“Yeah, you’re right..” Evan pushed himself off the kitchen counter, he grabbed his glass and walked towards the sofas. “Maybe I’m being a little bit paranoid, she’s fine..” Evan glances at Hen who gives him a nod and a pat on his shoulder.
“Turn the volume up” Eddie says as Chimney grabs the remote and quickly turns up the volume by pressing down on the button.
“We just confirmed that about two hours ago, there has been a school shooting here in Los Angeles. The remarkable thing is that the school where this happened, was an elementary school”
“Jesus” Eddie sighs.
“The police have confirmed that after about an hour and a half after the shooter had fired the first bullet, they shot down the shooter. The name of the school where this happened is the Great Oak Elementary School. Parents are arriving at the school now to pick up their kids. There’s one wounded teacher and two casualties, both were working at the school.”
“That’s horrible. Imagine you see this on the news and you have to pick up your traumatized child.” Hen says as she continues to listen to the tv.
“Can’t imagine what that must feel like” Eddie’s voice sounds through the room.
Evan was intensely thinking. Why was that name so familiar? What was it about that school that made him think that he had a connection to it? He didn’t have any kids, at least not yet. “Wait what school did they say?” Evan double checked the name with his team, to see if he heard them correctly.
“I think it was Great Oak Elementary School” Chimney says as he focuses again onto the television screen.
Evan’s heart dropped in his chest. As soon as he heard that name fall off the lips of his colleague's mouth, it felt like all of the air he had in his lungs was getting pushed out. Everything's coming together now.
It was the school his wife worked for.
“But why even an elementary school, not that any school would’ve been any better or different. But we’re talking about ages 5 to 10 years old. Those children are going to be scarred for life” Eddie’s dull voice sounded over the loft into Evan’s ears.
No texts, no calls, nothing.
Evan’s hearing is dull, everything is still continuing on the back of his mind but his brain is working over hours now. Making up all different kinds of scenarios of what could’ve happened in that school. “Wow Buck, you alright?” Another dull voice rang through his ears.
Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder, he flinched at the sudden touch and his eyes connected with Hen’s as he turned his head towards her. A frightened look was spread over his face as he tried to control his breathing.
He looked down to his feet, which were suddenly wet and cold. He realizes he had dropped his glass of water down to the ground. His boots are now soaking wet, with the water dripping down his pipes. But that was the last thing he was worried about right now.
His brain filled with all different kinds of scenarios were running through his mind. “(Y/n)” he mumbled through his panicked breaths as he tried to look at Hen, who was still pressing her hand onto his shoulder while her other hand was curled around his upper arm.
“Oh no..” Hen said as he puzzled the pieces together. Finally realizing what was happening and what Evan meant.
Bobby’s voice sounded through the space as he stepped onto the loft “What’s happening?”
“There has been a school shooting at Great Oaks Elementary. The school where Buck’s wife works” Hen quickly explained to Bobby as she held her grip onto Evan’s upper arm.
Evan’s eyes that were full of worry wandered towards his captain's eyes who was coming closer towards him every second. “She isn’t answering any of my calls or texts. And I’m not waiting for the hospital to call me and tell me that she’s..” Evan sighs at the worst case scenario that was in his mind.
“Please Bobby. I need to go. I need to see for myself if she’s okay.” Evan’s broken voice sounded.
“Look Buck, I get it. But you don’t have to do this on your own. We’re coming with you, whether you like it or not. (Y/n) is our family too.” Bobby says as he softly squeezed Evan’s shoulder. A small smile spread across Evan’s face as those words left Bobby’s mouth.
“Let’s go and find (Y/n)” Bobby says as he patted his hand onto Evan’s shoulder as a sign to go.
-
“What do you mean she isn’t here?” Evan says after Athena finished her conclusion. “I just told you, every teacher that was here on school grounds during the shooting has been checked by paramedics, and are now sitting in a room. They’re getting the information they need if they want help. But I’ve seen every teacher in that room, and she wasn’t there Buck, only her teaching assistant Katy.” Athena continues her explanation.
“Well, have you asked Katy if she knows anything about the whereabouts of my wife?” Evan asks, maybe a little annoyed. “No, not yet. I’m waiting for the professionals to finish their job. And after that, I’ll see if Katy is willing to talk” She calmly answers Evan’s question.
“How long is that gonna take?” Evan sighs as he puts his hands on his hips. He’s losing his patience. This is taking too long. “I’m sure they’re almost done, this should only take a few more minutes” Athena reassured him.
“I don’t have time for this.. what if Katy doesn’t know where she is? This might lead to a dead end.” Evan tries to stop himself from panicking, as he rushes a hand through his short curly hair. He had to do something. He couldn’t just stand there and wait on a teaching assistant who maybe doesn't have an answer to their questions.
Evan quickly turned around and slid his phone out of his pocket. He had to try it, at least one more time. He clicks on the green icon and clicks on her name, impatiently he presses the phone against his ear. Maybe she did have it with her.. right?
“Buck..” Evan could hear Bobby sigh as he was walking away from his team.
Evan listens to the sound of the phone beeping, trying to connect with the other phone. He was pacing through one of the hallways, silently listening to the beeps of the phone. Evan’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he could hear a ringtone going off from a distance. Was that someone else’s phone or was that the phone he was trying to reach?
The ringtone stopped playing when Evan was being sent to voicemail. He quickly presses the red button, and decides to try and call the phone again.
Once more the same ringtone sounds through the hallway.
Evan follows the sound, making his way through the hallways until after multiple times of calling her phone, he reaches the door of a classroom. The tone sounded loudly through the space of the room.
Evan stepped into the classroom and walked towards the desk where the phone was buzzing. “There you are..” Evan whispered to himself as he grabbed the phone and frowned at the idea of his wife leaving her phone behind. She never leaves her phone behind.
He shoved his own phone into his pocket as he made his way back towards his team who were now talking with a young woman, probably Katy.
“Can we please ask you a few questions?” Evan could hear Athena ask the TA, who nodded at her question. “When was the last time you saw (Y/n)?” Athena continued to ask her. “During the shooting, we were all hiding inside the classroom just like protocol said. And she told me to watch the kids.. she went to help the lady who was shot outside of our classroom. I heard multiple gunshots, when I was alone with the kids. But I haven’t seen her since she told me to watch them.” Katy explains.
Evan could feel his knees trembling, like they were suddenly turning into Jell-o.
“That’s everything I know” Katy says as she shrugs her shoulders. “It’s okay, thank you Katy. If something pops into your mind, give me a call” Athena says as she gives Katy her card with her contact details and Katy walks away.
“Alright, there’s two things we can do. One, we go to the hospital and check if she may be in the ER. Or two, we go check the..-” Athena gets cut off by Evan’s voice.
“Morgue” Evan finished Athena’s sentence and shook his head. “We’re going to the ER of the nearest hospital, she’s not dead. She can’t be.” Evan continued. “Buck.” Bobby’s voice spoke up when Evan wiped his hand against his forehead, as if it helped him to get rid of the thought of his wife being dead. “I refuse to believe that she’s dead, I want to go to the hospital” Evan states as he could hear his own voice trembling.
Evan felt Bobby’s hand landing onto his shoulder. “It’s your decision to make Buck, if you want to go to the hospital, we go to the hospital” Bobby said as he looked into Evan’s eyes again. Evan nodded. He made his decision.
The drive towards the nearest hospital was silent, but when the truck pulled to a stop Evan’s hand reached for the door and he jumped out as fast as he could.
He had waited long enough. He needed his answers now.
Before the rest of his team got out of the truck, Evan had already gone through the glass doors. Evan came to a stop at the nurse station, using his hands as a brake by pressing it against the desk.
“Hi, I’m looking for (Y/n) Buckley” he panted as he focussed on the nurse who was scrolling through the documents of people who had gotten in.
“Evan?” her familiar voice sounds through his ears. His eyes went wide as he heard that voice he had hoped to hear through the phone the first time he called her. He pushed himself off the desk he was leaning on and followed her voice.
“(Y/n)?” he softly said as he looked around him. When his eyes connected with hers, his heart skipped a beat. She was alive. Just like he said.
“Evan” she sighed as she finally saw her husband's face. Evan basically sprinted towards (Y/n) as he heard her broken voice say his name. Her knees were trembling, and were on the edge of giving in. “Hey! Hey! I’m here!” Evan panted as he curled his arms around his wife and she collapsed into his arms.
She was sobbing as soon as she felt his arms curled around her body and she tightened her grip around his body, like he was the only thing to keep her from drowning. He was the hand she had to hold onto. “I’m here” Evan let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding this entire time.
He let his hand cup the back of her head and he pressed his lips against her hair.
He slowly pulled back, but his arms remained around her body. He wasn’t letting her go. The hand he had pressed against the back of her head, wandered to her cheek as he wiped away her tears.
“W-what are you doing here? Are you hurt?” he stumbled as he quickly checked her on any wounds. She shook her head as she placed both of her hands down onto his chest. “No, I’m okay” she gasped through her tears.
When Evan’s eyes fell onto her hands, which were now placed on his chest, he noticed her hands which were still covered in dried blood.
He placed his hands over hers as he softly grabbed her hand and started inspecting it. “It isn’t mine” she sighed as she tried to reconnect her eyes with Evan’s, who was focussed on making sure his wife wasn’t hurt.
“Then whose blood is that?” Evan’s voice asked, concerned when his eyes remained on her hands. “T-the woman who had been shot..” she said as she tried to catch her breath. Evan’s eyes furrowed “I helped her..” in the middle of her sentence, she stopped talking. “I kept her alive, even with a gun pointed at my head” she continued.
She could hear the gunshots going off in the back of her mind, the explanation she had just given her husband brought her right back to that place. So much has happened in those few minutes, she barely had time to process everything that happened in such a short time.
Tears were streaming down her face as she was reminded of the incident. “He wanted to shoot me in the head”
“Oh baby..” a loud sigh left his lips as he pressed a kiss onto her forehead. “You did so good” he mumbled against her forehead as he pressed another kiss onto it and pulled his wife back into an embrace.
“I was so scared Evan, I really thought this is it.. that everything I did, was for the last time” (Y/n) sobbed as she locked her arms around his body once again and her head pressed against his broad chest. “But you fought like hell, like I knew you would. You fought for that woman, for the students, yourself and me. You fought your way back to me.” Evan said as he pulled away a little, so her head wouldn’t be touching his chest anymore and he could place both his hands onto her cheeks.
“You’re so much stronger than you think you are.”
______
A gasp fell off (Y/n)’s lips as a gunshot roared through the back of her mind. Her eyes were suddenly wide open and her entire body was drenched in sweat. She let her hands fall against her face as she sighed. It was just another dream, a nightmare to be more specific.
It had been weeks since the shooting on the Great Oak Elementary School, but what happened that day, was still haunting her until today.
Falling asleep was a problem at first, the first nights after the incident, she was all wrapped around Evan. Trying to get her to sleep like she was a baby that couldn’t find the right spot to sleep on.
Evan worked twenty four hour shifts, he couldn’t just go home in the middle of shift, in the middle of the night to help his wife to fall asleep at night. So sometimes, (Y/n) wouldn’t sleep at all at night, she would just wait until he came home and the second Evan was home she would doze off.
But now, it’s the constant nightmares she had. Every dream she had wasn’t the same, it’s not like she had the same nightmare over and over again on loop. No, she was having different kinds of scenario’s everytime she closed her eyes.
She let her hands fall down onto the mattress as she glanced at Evan who was peacefully asleep on his side of the bed. (Y/n) threw off the blanket and swung her feet over the side of the bed and grasped the first hoodie she saw lying down on the floor. The hoodie was a little oversized and fell over her bum.
(Y/n) stepped down the stairs of the loft and flicked on the kettle to make some tea. Maybe that would help her calm down. With her back towards the living room, she pressed her elbows down onto the flat surface of the kitchen counter.
She was tired, but couldn’t sleep. Not if she was having these nightmares, everytime she closed her eyes. (Y/n) let her head rest between her hands as she closes her eyes for a second, just to try and let the stress exit her body while the water was boiling.
Evan groaned as he turned around in bed and let his arm find the body of his wife. When his arm connected with the jumpy mattress, he pushed his head off the pillow as a confused frown was spread across his face. He wasn't expecting his arm to find the mattress, he was waiting for his arm to connect with (Y/n)’s body.
He lets his arm swipe along the mattress again to make sure she wasn’t somewhere else on the mattress. Evan turns his body and reaches out to turn on the night lamp on his nightstand. He squeezed his eyes as he tried to adjust his eyes to the bright light on his nightstand and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.
Evan swung his legs over the side of the bed as he stood up to make his way downstairs, determined to find his wife. When he silently stepped down the stairs, he smiled at the way she was standing. A Los Angeles Fire Department hoodie to keep her comfortable, her eyes closed as she was leaning on her hands. While the kettle was releasing steam as it was finished boiling.
A groan left her lips as she felt a hand curled around her hip and his chin was leaning on her shoulder. Her hand reached behind her as she tried to find Evan’s arm. “Can’t sleep?” his sleepy voice asked, with his eyes still closed as he was still trying to wake up.
“Yeah” she whispered as she nodded at his question, and she placed her other hand down on his cheek as he was still leaning with his chin onto her shoulder.
“Still having those nightmares huh?” He asked her as he pressed a kiss on the palm of her hand that was resting on his face.
“Yeah, what’s new..” she sighed, she had the feeling those nightmares weren’t going away anytime soon anyways. She grabbed a cup from the upper cabinet, placed it onto the counter and started to pour water from the kettle into it.
When the cup was full enough, she placed the kettle back. “Evan?” Her soft voice sounded raspy.
“Hmm?” Evan hummed as he slightly opened his eyes to check on his wife. His arm was still wrapped around her, curved around her hip. She swallowed loudly.
“I don’t know how much longer I can do this..” she whispered as she placed both of her hands flat against the counter as she stared right in front of her.
Evan’s hand started to come loose from her hip, as he let his lower back fall against the kitchen island, which was placed on the other side of the kitchen counter (Y/n) was making her tea on.
He folded his arms over each other as he leaned against the kitchen cabinets. “You mean the nightmares, right?” Evan needed a confirmation that he knew she was talking about.
She felt Evan leaving her side. But she couldn’t look at him without breaking down. So she remained standing with her back towards Evan. “No.. I meant, being a teacher.” She said as she started to make circles with her finger onto the kitchen counter.
“What? What do you mean? You love being a teacher” Evan said as he tried to make eye contact again. But she wouldn’t turn around.
She shook her head as she sighed, trying to keep her tears from falling down. “That was before this all happened. You know how exhausting it is to be wary of every single thing around you?” she sniffled as she turned her face towards the ceiling, trying everything in her power to not show her tears, or show her fear.
With her sleeves falling over her hands, she wiped the small tears away that had started rolling down her cheeks. “Every time before I even enter the school my throat goes dry, I start sweating and I can’t stop myself from shaking” she tried to say through her tears and sobs.
She turned her body, and let herself slide against the kitchen doors, dropping to the ground as she cried even harder. “I’m sick and tired of flinching at every sudden sound I hear. I can’t sleep, because any time when I close my eyes, even if it’s just for one silly second, I’m there again. With a gun against my head.” she confessed.
(Y/n) let the back of her head lean against the kitchen cabinet as she felt Evan coming closer, while she looked at the ceiling again. Trying to get rid of the tears that showed her biggest fears and weaknesses. “I can’t do this anymore Evan” she sobbed as she pressed her palms against her face. All she wanted to do was hide.
It feels like she’s drowning, drowning into her own fear and tears. The fear is over taking her like waves of the ocean, if no one would reach out that hand to help her.. she might drown.
“No.. you’re scared. And I get your reaction, but we don’t always make the best decisions when we’re operating out of fear” Evan spoke up as he curled his arm around her knee.
A sigh leaves Evan’s mouth as he tries to think of the right thing to say. “I know how hard it is to get over something so traumatizing, that you don’t know what you’re doing it for no more” he said as he tightened his arm around her knee. “But what happened could have happened anywhere. At the grocery store, in our own home, hell even at the fire station” Evan continued as he tried to get her attention, but she was too emotional to make eye contact.
She could hear every word he said, every breath he took, every moment of silence he needed, to think of what he was going to say next.
“So I need you to stop saying that you can’t do this. Because I know you can. You’re one of the strongest women I know. And I’m so proud to call you my wife. But right now, I need you to grab my hand and trust me when I say that we’ll figure this out.” tears were starting to well in Evan’s eyes as he quickly wiped his finger underneath his eyes to get rid of the tears he felt, as they were about to roll over his cheeks.
Evan loosened his grip around her knee as he reached out his hand, with his palm faced towards the ceiling. “We do this together, just like we did all the times I got hurt and didn’t know what to do” Evan said as he lowered his head, trying to get her eyes connected with him again.
Silence took over the space they were in.
Evan’s hand was still dangling between her knees as he waited for her attention and answer. “Together?” he asked one more time.
A soft smile made its way onto her face, as she nodded. “Together.” she said determined and placed her hand onto his as Evan sent her a small smile her way.
She had helped him countless times, now it was his turn to help her.
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vanteguccir · 6 months
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── ୨୧ ! 𝟰 𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗦 𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗧 𝗦𝗛𝗘 𝗠𝗔𝗗𝗘 𝗛𝗜𝗠 𝗦𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗘
          𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader
SUMMARY: Where Y/N is the only person who can make Matt smile genuinely; OR 4 times that Y/N made Matt smile.
WARNING: None.
REQUESTED?: Yes, by anons.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
1. Had Matt shaved his beard?
The morning started like any other in the triplets' house. The sun had barely risen over the horizon when the three found themselves in the typical kitchen, each of them still fighting sleep but ready to face another day of recording.
Nick was busy preparing breakfast, while Matt and Chris lounged lazily around the table, Chris with his head lying on the wooden surface.
"Smells good, Nick. What are you making?" Matt murmured, rubbing the drowsiness away from his eyes.
"Waffles and bacon." Nick responded in a low, slow tone, stirring the strips inside the ceramic frying pan.
"Bacon with waffles?" Chris grimaced, yawning loudly as he lifted his head, laying his body haphazardly on the chair.
Meanwhile, Y/N was still in her own world, enjoying a peaceful sleep in her shared room with Matt. However, her sleep was interrupted by the sound of a plate hitting the sink's marble counter, followed by a loud curse.
With a yawn, the girl slowly sat down on the bed, running a hand through her messy hair and running her sleepy eyes around the room, already having the idea that Matt was in the kitchen, where the sound had echoed from.
Seconds later, she got out of bed and headed to the bathroom, ready to start her morning routine. But something immediately caught her attention as soon as she entered the smaller room. On top of the sink was Matt's beard trimmer, an object she recognized all too well.
Her eyes widened in surprise, and she looked around, trying to process what she was seeing. Had Matt shaved his beard?
With her heart beating fast, Y/N ran back to the bedroom, grabbing the pajama shorts thrown on her boyfriend's gaming chair, quickly putting them on and finally leaving the room, completely ignoring her own messy appearance.
Back in the kitchen, the brothers were busy devouring the breakfast Nick had prepared. They barely noticed when Y/N walked out of the small hall that connected the room to her bedroom, her eyes fixed on Matt.
"Matt..." Her voice came out in an incredulous whisper as she approached, stopping in front of him and staring at his face intensely.
Matt looked up from his plate, smiling big when he saw her awake.
"Good morning, babe. How did you-" He interrupted his own sentence when he saw her condition, frowning in confusion and worry. "Hey, did something happen?"
Y/N swallowed hard, trying to maintain her composure, but the sight of Matt without a beard was too much for her. With a fake sob, she knelt before him, her eyes shining with false emotion.
"Matt, baby, how could you do this?" She whimpered, dramatizing every word. "You shaved your beard... The beard that I loved so much!"
The other two brothers watched the scene with wide eyes, not knowing whether to laugh or be worried about Y/N's reaction, unlike Matt, who took a few seconds to process what she had said, before a loud laugh escaped from his lips, his hands letting go of the food he was holding.
"We're done!"
Matt continued laughing, shaking his head in bewilderment.
"Y/N, did you hit your head?"
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2. Girls' night (with a masculine touch)
The night was warm and cozy in the triplets' house as Matt, Nick, Chris, and Y/N gathered in the living room. After a long day of recording and, on Y/N's part, studying, they decided it was time to relax and have fun together.
"What are we doing tonight?" Chris asked, throwing his phone onto his lap and looking around at the others, lowering his body onto the upholstery.
"Can we do our nails?" The suggestion escaped Nick's lips quickly, his eyes shining with excitement. "And maybe do some skincare."
"Like a girl's night?" Y/N smiled, straightening her posture quickly, feeling just as excited.
"Why not?" Matt shrugged, staring at his nails with a contemplative look. "But I've never done my own nails before, I always do them with Analysse."
"It's just painting your nails, like watercolor. It's not difficult, honey." Y/N waved her hand dismissively, getting up from her seat and running to her shared room with Matt, looking for her box of nail polish and nail's tools.
With their gear gathered, they arranged themselves comfortably and strategically on the couch, ready to begin their impromptu night of beauty.
Y/N led the way, skillfully beginning to paint her own nails as she explained the process.
"First, you need to apply a base coat to protect your nails." She explained, opening the base coat and carefully applying it, being quickly followed by Nick.
The brothers watched with interest, watching each movement with concentration.
"That seems easy enough." Chris commented, taking the little bottle from Y/N's hand and starting to apply it to his own nails.
Meanwhile, Matt was carefully examining the available nail polishes colors, trying to decide which one to choose. Y/N's eyes found his figure, a smile growing on her face, feeling great love for his appreciation and care for the moment.
"How about a black one with white details?" Matt suggested, holding up two bottles in the mentioned colors, showing them to Y/N with a proud smile on his face.
"It's going to look amazing, my love."
Chris quickly picked out his own nail polish color with Nick's help, returning to his seat while swinging his legs eagerly.
They dipped their brushes into the nail polish bottles with determination but soon discovered that painting their own nails wasn't as simple as it seemed.
"This is harder than I thought." Matt grumbled as he tried to paint his nails without smudging, his fingers shaking slightly as his tongue lolled slightly out of his lips in concentration.
Chris nodded, his lips pressed tightly together as he tried not to move his hand too much.
"I think I'm doing this wrong..."
"You two are doing pretty well for beginners." Y/N laughed softly, watching the brothers fondly.
After some errors, everyone finally finished painting their nails, each proudly displaying their own piece of art, even if it was a little smudged.
"Look at us, a bunch of nail professionals!" Nick joked, blowing on his freshly painted nails with a smile.
"Yeah, I guess we could consider a new career." Matt contributed, admiring his nails with a satisfied expression before raising his hands, his nails facing Y/N as he wiggled his fingers excitedly.
"It's perfect, babe, congratulations!" Y/N praised, leaning towards him slightly and sealing the back of his right hand with her lips lightly, exhaling the fresh smell of nail polish and acetone.
"Maybe we should open our own men's salon." Chris smiled, shaking his hands to dry the nail polish faster.
Matt laughed out loud, imagining the scene of them painting other men's nails with the same determination and enthusiasm they had moments ago. It would be comical.
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3. Video as a couple
Matt was nervous as he prepared to record his next video for his personal YouTube channel. It was still one of the first videos he posted there, and despite his enormous desire to make more content for his own channel, he felt an anxiety growing within him every time he thought about creating something new on his own.
Therefore, he decided to invite his girlfriend, Y/N, to participate with him in that specific one, taking advantage of the opportunity to introduce her as his girlfriend.
It's not that fans didn't know Y/N was his. They knew, and they knew it very well, but Matt never got around to introducing her as such officially.
"Are you ready for this?" He asked, looking at Y/N with a nervous smile.
"I should be the one asking you that." Y/N smiled small before nodding, holding his free hand affectionately. "But yes, I am. There's nothing I want more than to be said to be your girlfriend, baby."
With a nervous sigh, Matt began to set up the camera on the dashboard of the car, while Y/N settled into the passenger seat next to him, trying to calm him with words of encouragement.
"You'll do amazingly well, hon. I'm sure of it." Y/N said, leaning over the car console and giving him a soft kiss on the cheek.
Finally, everything was ready, and Matt began recording, his voice a little shaky at first but soon becoming more confident as he got used to the camera without his brothers around him.
"Hey! Welcome to my personal YouTube channel." He began, smiling slightly at the camera. "Today I have a very special guest for you to meet."
He turned his face to Y/N with a twinkle in his eye, who waved at the lenses, opening a shy smile.
"This is Y/N, my girlfriend." Matt continued, looking at her with big heart eyes. "Most of you already know her as our best friend, and maybe you already know about our relationship, but now we're finally going public to make it official... Well, she agreed to participate in today's video, so I hope you enjoy getting to know her a little better."
Y/N smiled as she watched her boyfriend introduce her as his, her cheeks taking on a reddish hue, feeling a little nervous and shy, but happy to be there next to him.
To make things more fun, Matt decided to answer some questions asked by fans about the two of them together or individually. He selected some of the funniest and most interesting questions and read them out loud for the two of them to discuss.
"Okay, first question." Matt began, looking at his phone in hand. "How we met?"
"Well, we actually met at a friend's birthday party from our school in elementary school. Matt was trying to impress everyone with his basketball skills, but he ended up hitting the ball over one of the girls' heads." Y/N laughed, remembering the story fondly.
Matt blushed at the memory, shaking his head and looking down, trying to hide the involuntary smile that took over his face.
"Next!" Matt cleared his throat, his voice coming out high-pitched from the shyness of the previous event. "What's the secret to a long-lasting relationship?"
"Oh, great question!" Y/N clapped her hands in excitement, lifting her legs and pressing the soles of her feet onto the seat, keeping her knees bent and tights against her chest. "For me, the key is communication and mutual support. It's important to always be honest with each other and literally be there through the good times and the bad."
"For sure, I also think it's essential to have understanding and empathy for each other. Being willing to listen and understand your partner's needs makes all the difference." Matt contributed.
He looked at his girlfriend, waiting for approval and receiving a big smile in return, which was accompanied by a nod.
"What's the most memorable memory you've had together?" Matt read the next question quickly, before looking up, his eyes alight with nostalgia. "There are so many wonderful memories to choose." He reflected, thoughtfully. "But one of my favorites was when we made our first unplanned trip together almost two years ago and ended up getting lost in a small town in Italy."
"Oh my God, so true!" Y/N threw her head back, laughing loudly at the memory. "That was an unforgettable experience. I remember we went to ask for directions at a small restaurant right on the corner from one of the alleys, and there were several pastas hanging, drying. I just asked the main chief what that was, and boom, we passed all day in that restaurant, tasting different types of fresh pasta and discovering more of their culture together."
As the video continued, Matt and Y/N shared more stories, laughs, and loving moments. They answered questions about their funny habits, their favorite couple traditions, and even their future plans together.
In the end, when Matt ended the video with a warm thank you to the fans who would watch it when posted, he turned to Y/N with a beaming smile.
"Thank you for doing this with me, petal." The brunette whispered, leaning over the car console and pulling her into a tight hug, smiling widely. "It meant the world for me."
"I'll always be here to support you, Matt. And I can't wait to make more videos together in the future." Y/N smiled, feeling happy to have shared that moment with Matt.
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4. Kittens day
Y/N woke up excitedly that morning, knowing it was the day she would volunteer at the cat kennel like she always did every Tuesday. It was an activity she loved doing, and she always invited Matt to join her, but his work with YouTube always ended up interfering.
However, this time, Matt had surprised Y/N by making room in his schedule to join her. She couldn't wait to share this experience with him.
When they arrived at the kennel, they were greeted by the soft sound of meows and purrs. Y/N smiled when she saw the felines playing and snuggling on their colorful scratching posts of all possible sizes.
"It's so good to be here." She said excitedly to Matt, taking his hand as they walked through the decorated halls. "Cats are so adorable and deserve so much love and affection."
Matt smiled as he listened to her chatter about the felines, watching them and her with fascination.
The couple spent the day taking care of the cats, feeding them, cleaning their litter boxes, and, of course, playing with them. Y/N taught Matt the proper way to hold and pet kittens, and he was soon having as much fun as she was.
"I never want to leave again." Matt suddenly commented as, sitting side by side on the fluffy rug, they watched a group of kittens playing with a fur ball. "I understand why you love coming here every week."
"It's a special place, with special cats... You know, I'm really glad you're here with me today." Y/N smiled, lifting her head slightly to look at him better, feeling her heart warm when she realized that Matt was just as involved in the activity as she was.
"I'm glad too."
At the end of the day, as they were about to leave, Matt suddenly stopped, looking at a cat in one of the cages. It was an orange cat with bright blue eyes that stared back at him curiously.
"Wow, he is perfect." Matt whispered, slowly approaching the cage. "He seems so friendly."
"You like him, don't you?" Y/N smiled, following him towards the feline, noticing the immediate connection between Matt and the cat.
"Yeah, I really do." Matt nodded, his eyes shining with determination. "What do you think about having a cat?"
Y/N felt a wave of emotion and happiness wash over her when she heard him, taking a few seconds to process if she was creating things in her head, realizing she wasn't when she noticed Matt looking at her with expecting eyes.
"Oh my God, really?" Her voice came out louder than expected, slightly scaring the kitten. "Oops, I'm sorry, little kitten."
With beaming smiles and clasped hands, they went to the kennel staff to begin the adoption process. While Y/N filled out the forms, Matt kept his eyes fixed on the cat lovingly, imagining their days with the new addition.
"What will be his name, my love?" His girlfriend's voice sounded behind him, breaking him out of his reverie. Matt shook his head slightly, focusing his attention on Y/N again, an easy smile stretching across his face.
"Snuggles. His name will be Snuggles."
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