#it will be interesting to see how it works but the the new gender inclusive rules may be a start

[tutuandscoot]

I think it was really interesting early in the interview Rod starts talking about the state of figure skating and a bit of the history of it and how it’s popularity has really dropped off and lost it’s wow factor recently both domestically and internationally and how VM really were the golden age where 🇨🇦 was so strong across all disciplines, and the generation/s before had these stars like Kurt and Elvis. Then Scott jumps in and asks quite broadly if FS is an accessible sport for the general public to watch and people to get interested/active in, and Rod starts to nod affirmatively like ‘yes absolutely it is’ and the way Scott posed the question was kind of rhetorical because straight away he says ‘no it’s not really’.

Now there are those who know far more about FS than me (and Rod) but as a sportscaster he had been around it for a long time whether he knew the details of it or not, he saw the evolution of it and more from a viewer/media perspective, but it’s just interesting those two very differing perspectives of Rod’s yes, it is accessible and Scott’s no it isn’t- but they need to make it accessible again.

It’s very obvious FS has dropped off the radar esp in the last olys the interest was way down and the only thing that tuned people in was the doping fiasco- which it’s never a good thing when it’s doping or judging or Nancy and Tonya that makes people watch the sport coz then it becomes not about the sport- it’s about the artificial headlines. There was of course many years of accessibility brought on the talent of skaters like VM, Yuna, Yuzu and earlier skaters like Michelle, Sasha, maybe even some of the Russian men..? and others also.

It’s the kind of thing where there’s got to be something truly interesting about it on its own- no scandals, for it to be accessible to casual viewers. There’s got to be the skaters with the excitement and wow factor that makes people who don’t know much about the sport and just see the jumps and the spins and the pretty costumes and thinks it looks easy when really it is one of the hardest sports you can possibly do, find satisfaction in watching it. This last cycle or so esp in ice dance I think that has become really obvious- singles has had the increase in the jumps which to laymen is pretty impressive, but ice dance doesn’t have that built in physical wow factor- teams have to create that themselves and this is kinda jumping off the post I wrote the other day about Canadian nationals that it’s just boring now for the casual viewer. It’s nice and pretty but there’s no wow factor. It was the same with the 2022 olys.

VM have their own way of justifying it in that the stories they tell are universal so people can relate to them but also people related to them coz they were two humans just dancing together, and also had this unbelievable athleticism. That’s one of the other things that puts them in that top echelon of skaters. They were different. At that top level all teams are nice and good but for the average viewer across the board there is no excitement there.

So when Scott says is it accessible? not really, I think he’s looking at it from both the inside workings of the judging and politics and the affect that has on an event’s legitimacy but also creating athletes that reach beyond the boards of a rink and make it interesting for the casual viewer. I think that’s gonna take a long time and very few will actually achieve it and blatantly I don’t think anyone will ever do it like VM.

I think the sport as a whole is really going through a period of redefining it’s self maybe like it never has before because of the change in media environment as well, you can watch stuff anytime any where/ some 5 second clip of a 13yr old doing a quad, but that’s all you get and that’s what today’s entertainment is designed for- you don’t have to put a full package together coz peoples’ attention spans don’t last that long- so to hold an audience for 4 minutes is getting harder and harder. (On this note T also made some great remarks on the entertainment environment being so saturated with options, there’s only so many ice shows you can go to- either Stars or Disney on Ice type shows before it just gets repetitive. That’s where they made a small indent with their tours but the industry needs more reinvention like that).

I just thought those were some interesting points and a really honest self-examination of the work he and the skating community has ahead of them.

Again just some of my own person thoughts I don’t claim to know everything about the inner workings of this sport

[novaandmali]

ARTISTS WANTED! 

We’re making a new book filled with pulpy sci-fi illustrations based on classic artworks (pre-1800), and, as always, LGBT and POC inclusive <3

Applications open March 25th at noon - the application will NOT be available before that time and will be removed after apps close. HUGE shout out to @ Nukeillustrate for this absolutely stunning piece, lovingly borrowed from “And They Were Monsters.”

The application will NOT be available until that date - we will post it here, instagram (nova_mali), bluesky, and tumblr (novaandmali). The application will be open for five days (March 29th) or until we hit 1000 applications. Please be sure to set an alarm and get your application in ASAP - we will not be able to take any applications through email, dms, or after they close.

A tentative schedule:

Results emailed by April 3rd - everyone will get an email! Sketch due May 15 Final work due June 15 Kickstarter runs July 1-31

We are looking for 50-60 artists (who MUST be 18+ years old by April 3) to join us to create a piece of digital art and/or merch. Traditional art is also accepted if scanned/photographed at a professional level.

We're looking specifically to increase the diversity of our artists, both in regards to race and gender - we want to be including all kinds of voices. Same thing with our art - we're looking to increase the variety of cultures, body types, and disabilities represented.

This is a PAID job. We’ve paid in the range of 200-300 for similar projects in the past, based on a set contract amount plus anything left over after production and shipping, split between everyone. Example: $150 in the contract and $100 extra per artist share. The additional amount will depend on how successful the Kickstarter campaign is.

I’ll post more later this week but first and foremost, get ready to go looking for interesting classical art to re-do into pulpy sci-fi! Your app will ask you what you’re thinking about creating. This is not a final answer but we want to know what vibe, what era, etc what you’re thinking about. 

We’re asking for art pieces that are pre-1800. I want you to really get digging and find some epic cool old stuff, particularly from more women artists and artists of color. Non-Western art is very very much included in our scope of work - we can’t wait to see your ideas!

I know older art tends to have weird people or weird perspectives - that doesn't need to translate to your final art. Just get funky with where you're finding inspiration! We will discuss this in more detail once we’ve hired everyone.

We really want to play with the idea of taking something very very old and make it very very futuristic - it should be funky and fun, and of course full of delightfully gay art <3

I’ll post exactly what questions the app will entail later this week.

The application will include things like: a link to your portfolio (instagram and twitter are NOT accepted as a portfolio) and an idea of what art pieces you’re thinking about and how to transform them.

We also ask for a short artist bio, like twitter style - short and sweet. Please don’t talk down about yourself or your skills - talk yourself up! Make me excited to see your art!!

About us: we’re two non-binary lesbians who really love cats and gay art. We’ve enjoyed our work as a queer publishing house and can’t wait to do more! Some of our previous works include classics but make it gay, And They Were Monsters, and Cover Me Queer.

Check out our work at www.novaandmali.com . 

[ultfreakme]

Thoughts on Jessie Gender's video on NATLA

I really admire Jessie Gender's videos usually, she's the one whom I usually go to to see videos on gender and queerness in media. I like her stuff a lot and respect their work.

But the NATLA video left me going "no, wait, that's not what happened" a lot. I can't summarize the video, I suggest people go watch it if they want to know but I disagree with practically everything for the most part.

I'm not anybody on the internet. But what I do have is a lifetime of growing up on ATLA, a degree in Sociology and English Literature, coming from a culture that ATLA is based on, studying about colonial rule, researching the cultures ATLA is based on in my spare time and a love for the original. Does that establish some legitimacy? If for some reason you feel like you need to go hate on Jessie for this, DON'T. DO NOT. This is me just critiquing because I think the video content was biased and I want to honestly engage with the points made because everyone has a tendency to demonize the adaption without looking at it on its own merit. With that said:

Point 1: Sokka's sexism is taken out to make the show more palatable and his arc in the Kyoshi Island episode undermines Suki to prop up Sokka.

She says that Sokka's sexism and him addressing it is a show-long arc, and him deconstructing that is him fighting against the colonial sexism of the Fire Nation.

Sokka's sexism is explicitly dealt with in one episode. He's shown to be overtly sexist in the first 4 and never again except for little comments here and there that every other character makes as well and goes unaddressed. His sexism is not because of the Fire Nation- FN is very inclusive of women as warriors. Sokka's sexism is an anomaly because no one but him cares that Katara isn't just sitting home mending clothes(Bato, Hakoda, none of the men on the ship they are on in S3 say a word and she takes off to join Aang in the Fire Nation islands).

If Sokka's sexism is not systematic to the Southern Water Tribe or caused by the Fire Nation, what kind of commentary on sexism is this?

She also says Suki is played down and demured to give Sokka confidence when she's teaching him, taking away her arc as she pines for the new boy who she likes because he's shirtless. Sokka's throughout the episode shows insecurity and a more subtle form of sexism where he's trying ton prove he's as good as her. He's trying to show off his strength to her, and failing miserably and when he realizes she bested him, he walks away. He goes into it assuming he's better than her but walks away realizing shit she is GOOD. Then he goes to her dojo to observe the practice and follows along, Suki invites him in seeing him fucking up the forms outside and teaches him.

Suki falls for a tackle Sokka does in the og and live action. In the OG, it's shown as Sokka ACTUALLY being better. In the live action? He isn't. One lesson doesn't make him better, she transitions from actually teaching him to kinda flirting until she completely stops. She's not weakening herself for him, both of them are expressing romantic interest. How did Sokka, a boy who that morning was defeated by them, get better than SUKI in a spar she put genuine effort in? I think that's frankly more sexist than the live action take.

Additionally, Suki was meant to be a one-off character meant to teach Sokka that sexism is bad. She existed entirely to serve Sokka's character arc and had no independent motivation in season 1. In the live action, we see her talk about wanting to go into the world, and see her growing motivation through Aang's presence of wanting to not just protect Kyoshi Island, but the world. She became what she is only in season 2 and 3. Sokka's sexism arc didn't even pan out well because he never addressed the issue with Katara after that episode, the first and most affected victim of his sexism.

Sokka wearing the armor in the original, is a joke. Aang calls their uniform a dress while laughing (it's not, like it's not even constructed like one, the bottoms are loose pants called Hakama). He isn't put into the uniform to show solidarity, it's a joke, and we are meant to be laughing at Sokka for the most part. Queer fans have reclaimed and redefined that scene to be like drag, but that wasn't the original intention of the show because we get jokes on Aang's masculinity which never actively get refuted from Toph in season 2. Katara of all people points out Sokka wearing a poinytail in a demeaning manner multiple times, a supposedly girly hairstyle. If the original wanted to honor Sokka embracing gender fluidity, they wouldn't consistently mock him for being choosy about buying a bag and wearing a ponytail(which in-universe has cultural importance to him).

All signs of 'femininity' in Sokka are played for laughs in the rest of the show(down to the scene where he draws a rainbow, and his master Piandao simply rolls his eyes).

Sokka is also never once shown as a better warrior in the live action- his story is the opposite. Sokka yearns here to be an engineer, a scientist tinkering away with new inventions. His father Hakoda and the SWT discourages this because there is no value in that for them. Value is shown for them to come from physical strength, which Sokka NEVER has in live action season 1(him having biceps and being shirtless is not a glorification of strength). He's good, but he's nothing special. His true highlight is in his intellect and the show implies pretty well that Sokka doesn't need to be physically strong or a warrior to fight back against oppression.

That's his defining line in the show teasers "you do not need to be a warrior, to be a hero."

Point 2: The sexism arc isn't replaced by anything more nuanced.

It is! It's replaced by the biases against bending. Sokka discourages Katara from bending because the Fire Nation attacked the SWT to eliminate waterbenders. Both Katara and Sokka hold fear for waterbending, a part of their own culture, specifically because of the Fire Nation's hegemony and hierarchical beliefs. Waterbending = preservation of culture and Katara says these exact words in episode 1. Sokka stopping her is him being under the colonial hegemony of the FN because waterbending is what brought Fire Nation soldiers to their shores to kill their mom. That's the new arc and it has follow through to the end. Instead of Sokka telling Katara to kick ass because he isn't sexist anymore, the live action Sokka says it because he's embraced waterbending and his own culture now through seeing Katara grow and letting her choose for herself what's best for her (instead of smothering in his faux warrior persona, which they literally discuss when stuck in the cave). This arc is exclusive to the show, there's no comment on the cultural significance and erasure of waterbending in the original.

It's made more explicit in Katara's arc, where she needs to get past the fear the Fire Nation has put in her of the dangers of her own bending, and embrace that her people wanted to protect it (Kya sacrificing herself, Gran-Gran hiding the waterbending scroll).

Point 3: Showing the genocide of the Air Nomads is disrespectful

In the original, the Air Nomads are nothing but a memory. At all times. We never see the influence of the Air Nomad culture on Aang, or see them alive and thriving at any point. We see them fight back on the live action, and the actual genocide is a few short minutes, interspersed with Aang sinking. It's not a lingering process and it shows the abilities of Air Nomads. Jessie says this is purely aesthetic and to be cool, but there are significant moments that happen here.

Establishing the powers of Air Benders- this is the first and last time we'll get to see Air Bending on this scale and this shows what they can do

There's a scene where two air nomads nod to one another, and the air nomad switches from defensive to an extremely offensive move. It shows that this isn't typical for the Air Nomads, and that they are being pushed to their limits

This is a festival, they were defending themselves and it's important to show that the Air Nomads didn't just go silently without a fight and were ambushed on an important day.

To show the Fire Nation's cruelty and the extent of their power during the comet specifically.

To give weight to WHY everyone Aang runs into is so critical and hateful of the fact that he was gone, and to also show why Aang never refutes them and the weight of what he's lost (and also that even if he were there, he couldn't have done anything)

It's not just to be cool, it's honestly not cool to watch and taking Gordon Cormier, a child's quote to say that's what everyone's impression is, is disingenuous despite the disclaimer given. The kids' quotes always get taken out of context. Reviewers and Avatar fans who went to the premiere were disturbed overall by the violence. They did not think of the Fire Nation as "cool", they saw the Air Nomads like that. Like don't we want people to think of the Air Nomads in a positive light for fighting back?

Their culture gets little to no expansion in the original, and whatever Aang has left of them is actually slowly stripped away in the original.

Aang is made to okay the destruction and modification of the Northern Air Temple when destruction is shown as wrong during his rage and grief in the Southern Air Temple. The new settlers have used the gliders of Air Nomads to device weapons that fly, which were then sold to the Fire Nation. The Mechanist and his people continue this and create more weapons to fight the war in the temples(albeit this time agaisnt the fire nation but the cycle of violence continues using devices and cultures of a peaceful people). A once-peaceful place, is now a center for war innovation and Aang is told to accept this because he must let go of the past to look to the future.

The above, in comparison to Aang simply saying "I should let go of the past and look to the future" is FAR more disrespectful of Aang's culture and past. The live action keeps Gyatso's memory a constant companion to Aang, he is terrified of letting go of the past and it hinders him from simply living.

Point 4: Violence is shown as good and the cycle of violence is perpetuated.

She says Kyoshi demanding Aang to fight back and hit hard is showing that Aang needs to embrace strength and power. That everyone telling him to fight and be alone means strength is given importance, and that the same is shown when Zuko says "sometimes the weak can become strong, sometime you just have to give them a chance."

Kyoshi is wrong. She is willfully portrayed as powerful, but harsh. Roku(though his screentime was small) disagrees with her and tells Aang to find his own way of fighting and that is ultimately what Aang follows.

Kyoshi doesn't come off as correct, she's demanding and harsh, unforgiving. Aang initially lets her take over because he is scared of the power he holds and she promises she can control it to help others. Aang doesn't want power(he literally says 'I don't want these powers'). In the finale, he gives in to the ocean spirit and does what Kyoshi asks; save everyone, even if it costs his own life. But it is shown as a tragedy. Katara calls back for him and tells him he shouldn't have to sacrifice himself, that he has a place in this world as he is no matter what others tell him and he listens to THAT. He says he will save the world not alone, but with his friends, in the memory of the Air Nomads to ensure it never happens again.

Physical strength is only a priority to Katara's character. Sokka doesn't fight in the end, he's begging Yue to not sacrifice herself and is protecting her. He's not some macho man. Aang is also not embracing power.

Zuko says that line not to show that he can grow stronger, but that people should get second chances. He's a hurt kid wishing his father had the compassion to let him grow. But he doesn't and Zuko walks away from it thinking physical strength and bending prowess is important, crushing his compassion. That line on a meta level isn't even about physical strength. It's about mental fortitude and character, and the strength to be compassionate.

Jet was mentioned as being portrayed as more wrong, but in the original he was ready to sink a village of innocents. in the live action he genuinely helped Katara with her waterbending and was justified in wanting to kill the mechanist(who collaborated with the fire nation) and King Bumi (who is neutral, incompetent and has let the Fire Nation run rampant in the city). He's more sympathetic here because he's doing it with a concrete reason, and he didn't even manipulate Katara the way he did in the original. She was genuinely charmed by him.

A big problem I had with Jessie's video was putting in clips from some right-wing channel between critique of NATLA....which....why? Huh? And these were used to say NATLA is leaning into fascist tendencies and smoothing out any critique of colonialism when it really isn't. I think NATLA is very explicitly saying the same message as the original. Not in the same way, but it is. The show actively engages audiences and the characters in discussions of cultural erasure and the problems of valuing power(the latter especially through Zuko and Azula).

There are million issues with the live action (Sokka's casting, ableism in Zuko's burn scar, the writing issues, pacing issues, the lack of screen time for Aang and focus on the Fire family). The ones Jessie Gender discussed though, are not it.

[faerieroyal]

Hey!! May I suggest/request some headcanons of what Ken (Ryan Gosling) dating a zookeeper Barbie would include, please? Thank you!!

ooooh, yay, a request for ken, i was honestly worried i wasn’t gonna get any for him !! thank you so much, dear anon, and i really hope you like these headcanons !! <3

✩⡱ headcanons: ken (ryan gosling) x gn!zookeeper barbie!reader

(note: i am aware that technically all the barbies are ladies, but in the interest of inclusion i am keeping this gender-neutral - hope you don’t mind!!)

— in a world like barbieland, where so much is the same - the days, the weather, the outfits, the words exchanged between those who live here - you are a notable outlier.

— rather than spend your days at the beach or cruising around the pristine streets of barbieland like your barbie counterparts, you are more than content to spend all your time in barbieland's only zoo, where you work, among the animals. rather than perfectly fitting clothes in pastel colors, your wardrobe consists of a standard zookeeper uniform, beige and khaki and shorts and t-shirts, the type of clothing always ready to be stained with dirt and animal saliva even if they somehow never are.

— you're also a bit different from the other barbies, and even the kens, in terms of personality. you much prefer the company of animals, and after spending so long among them (although curiously, it has never felt like that long), you're left in a place of often not knowing how to socialize with people. the other barbies and kens are all very nice to you when they come to visit the zoo or see you in public, of course - you're not sure any of them know how not to be nice - but the fact remains: you are quiet and relatively isolated, not peppy and social like every other barbie seems to be.

— which is, perhaps, exactly what allows this particular ken to notice you.

— the two of you know each other, of course, everybody knows everybody in barbieland, but you don't have an official conversation until one day when the other barbies finally convince you to come to the beach with them.

— you’re feeling intensely awkward when you first arrive with them, an unusual sight at the beach standing there in a borrowed swimsuit, and that’s when ken first sees you.

— he originally comes up just to talk to classic barbie, but of course take a moment to say hello to all the other barbies standing with her, and it’s then that he notices you, standing there between physicist barbie and president barbie and clearly trying hard to hide how nervous you are. he doesn’t recall ever having seen you before, and given that a new barbie hasn’t appeared in barbieland in a really long time and he definitely would have known if it had happened, he’s immediately interested in who you are and what you must have been doing in order for him to have never met you before now.

— you’re the last barbie he greets, and when he hits you with his classic “hi, barbie!” and dazzling smile, all you find yourself really able to do is smile and awkwardly wave back, feeling like your face is on fire. of course, this only draws ken in more (he’s as curious as a puppy), and so he asks if you want to share a towel with him so that he can get to know you better!

— you’re a little nervous about the other barbies getting upset if you leave them, but they’re all smiles, encouraging you to go and have fun with ken if you want to (and in fact, classic barbie might even give you an extra little push towards him, happy that ken might finally have someone else to have a crush on since she doesn’t return his feelings), so you agree to the towel-sharing, face getting even hotter at how utterly excited ken looks about it.

— the two of you wind up talking for almost two hours, with ken wanting to know everything about you and asking a million questions about your animals and even promising to come to the zoo as soon as possible. he’s so invested in talking to you that even when beach ken taunts him and tries to challenge him to a volleyball match, he doesn’t accept like he normally would - which is how the other barbies realize that in such a short time, he’s already starting to develop a crush on you. (the kens, bless their hearts, take a little longer to pick up on it, but when allan lets them know they very quickly realize how obvious it is.)

— the two of you continue talking and hanging out for a few weeks, during which you even give ken a private tour of the whole zoo and allow him to help you feed the animals, which you’ve never done for anyone before. you’re not quite sure why you offer to let him help you at first, but it’s afterwards that you realize: ken’s special to you. you like him, in the way he used to like classic barbie. in a dating way.

— (even if he does keep mixing up which feeds are meant for which animals and almost gave your zebras the steaks meant for the lions. but you kind of like that he’s a little hopeless, if you’re being honest; it’s ridiculously endearing.)

— it’s about two months, while the two of you are dancing at the first party at classic barbie’s dreamhouse that you’ve ever been to, that ken eagerly asks if he can be your boyfriend. for a moment, you’re frozen in surprise - you ever actually thought he returned your feelings, even though it’s rather obvious as you actually look back - but you quickly beam back at him and, under the pink glow of the dreamhouse’s lights, give this sweet man the only answer you could ever give.

— “of course, ken. i’d love for you to be my boyfriend.”

— and as nervous as you are for the first few weeks after that, it turns out to be amazing. there isn’t even a lot of change from when the two of you were friends; you still spend the majority of your time together, and ken still follows you around like a puppy dog, always telling you about how cool he thinks you are and doing his best to help you take care of your animals (which, again, makes you feel a little bit silly for not realizing he liked you back sooner).

— one of the only differences is that now, you feel a lot less nervous about showering ken with as many compliments as he gives you; barely an hour goes by without the two of you telling each other how beautiful and amazing you find the other person. (the other barbies, for the record, find this absolutely adorable and can never keep from constantly “awww”ing when the two of you hang out with them.)

— another difference, and possibly the best one of all, is that you actually get to kiss him. your kisses normally aren’t very long, just sweet little pecks on the lips - or a flurry of little kisses all over your face when ken gets in a silly mood - but they’re always incredibly nice and leave both of you grinning from ear to ear when you pull away.

— your animals warm up to ken a lot more once the two of you start dating, too. they weren’t always the friendliest to him before, both since they’re protective of you and because he isn’t the best at caring for them, but once they realize that ken really cares about you and isn’t going to do you or them any harm, they become a lot warmer, making happy noises when he approaches and bumping their heads into his hand to demand pets even when he messes up their feeding yet again. (he even strikes up something of a friendship with amelia, one of your lionesses, and you’ve often found him just sitting in her enclosure, having a lively one-sided conversation while she rests her large head in his lap.)

— of course, the other barbies and kens (as well as allan) are very supportive of your relationship - even beach ken, as reluctant as he is to think positively of his rival, can acknowledge that you’re adorable together.

— classic barbie tells you as much one sunny day on the beach, almost exactly like the one where you and ken first met - except that this time, you’re sitting there confidently in your own swimsuit, one that you bought after ken noticed it and declared that he thought you’d look amazing in it, as you lounge on a beach chair with the other barbies and watch the kens square off against each other at the volleyball nets.

— “you know, barbie, you and ken really do make an amazing couple. i’m super happy for you guys; just because i didn’t like him as a boyfriend doesn’t mean he shouldn’t ever get to be anyone’s boyfriend, so i’m really glad he’s yours.”

— and you look over at ken, your ken, as he successfully keeps beach ken from scoring and immediately looks back at you with a big smile to see if you noticed, and you smile as bright as barbieland’s ever-shining sun.

— “me too, barbie. me too.”

barbie (2023) taglist: empty for now !

general taglist: @maddipoof, @thatmagickjuju, @talkingturnedtoscreamss, @malafvma, @auxiliarydetective, @heliads, @oneirataxia-girl !

( send me an ask if you want to be added to a taglist !! )

[ninjagobythenumbers]

Ninjago Species by the Season

I made this chart upon @weirdcatbean's request. I also wanted to include allignment and centrality on this chart, but as you can see that would get pretty busy.

Here's the percentages.

Interestingly, it keeps a pretty consistent human:non-human ratio. The earlier seasons actually have less humans percentage wise, which I did not expect. However, I should note that this chart includes every single named character, so while yes there may be 36 humans in Seabound for instance, 19 of them are ensemble who were just there for Nya's funeral. I'll be making an improved version of this chart later that's a bit easier to read and includes some more relavant data points. Now, you may be wondering, why didn't I include what the chart looks like without the inclusion of ensemble from the beginning. I admit, normally I would. To explain why I didn't, I have to tell the story of how I came up with these numbers.

Methodology

While I could have just tallied up individual species season by season, I knew I would probably want to play with the data in other ways besides just this one chart. Thus, I undertook the massive endeavor of indexxing every Ninjago character by Name, Type, Allignment, Species, Gender, and Season. For instance, here's the pilot season.

You may be wondering what the New/Old column is all about. In order to include the full character breakdown for each season, I had to make new entries of each character every season. This created a lot of repeats, so to separate unique characters from repeats I noted whether character's were introduced with this season (new) or whether they were a repeat (old). This was also useful in that it allowed me to alter the criteria of a character with each season so I can accomadate for changes such as Cole turning into a ghost. Once I had compiled this data (839 entries and 292 unique characters), I attempted to use Google Sheets' pre-provided data analysis.

It was sort of useful, but it would only show the top 4 and bottom 4 frequencies and I couldn't copy and paste the data. It also was a bit fussy around filters. Thus, I did something a bit wonky where I filtered by season and just copy pasted the column into a different sheet.

I then used functions (ex: =COUNTIF(AC3:AC1002, "Skeleton")) to create my raw data table which you can view above. This process worked but it had a lot of problems. It was time consuming, didn't allow me to employ multiple filters, and, most importantly of all, it wasn't allowing me to use this data I had spent days compiling to its full extent. Thus, I decided to create a sort of search engine for Ninjago characters.

This search engine allows me to input criteria and recieve not only the total characters that fit the criteria, but a list of all of their entries. The fact it lists all of their entries may not sound that impressive, but trust, it is. (For me at least) Here's an example search of good, recurring Serpentine.

I am very excited about the potential of this tool. It's going to allow me to create a lot of great charts, including an improved Species by Season chart. For now though, I'm only uploading the original requested chart, because creating this tool has taken the better part of my day. I plan on sharing it, but I still need to work out a few kinks so you can look forward to that as well. I know I already said it, but I'm so, so excited about what I'll be able to make. Here's a preview to the search if you're interested. It also includes all my previous spreadsheets, but I'm still working out some formatting issues and stuff.

[wanderingaldecaldo]

WIP Whenever on a Wednesday

I am terrible at keeping up with tags in general but I am aghast to see my oldest WIP Whenever tag was from nearly 8 weeks ago. I completed a couple of things since my last one, namely the sock garters and the boots, and added quite a few more projects to the list than I scratched off. 😩

Tagged by (and tagging back) @fly-amanitaa @streetkid-named-desire @ouroboros-hideout @aggravateddurian @luvwich

@ghostoffuturespast. Also tagging with the usual zero pressure @olath124 @dustymagpie @medtech-mara @corpo-cunt-couture

@merge-conflict @blackrevell @fereldanwench and YOU reading this! Share and tag me!

Modding

Shocking that it's still my main focus 🙄 but the first one is in support of a couple of VP project:

Presidential Props which include a variety of flags and the NUSA medal with box. The flags are part of the VP set below, though I didn't actually show them here.

Featuring: five different flag varieties with five appearances each; medal box in multiple states, plus the medal itself; and the presidential coin, scalable and with multiple appearances.

SlutWear, a new line of clothing that will tell NC just how slutty your V is. It will be gender and (smaller) size inclusive. 😊

Does Val really heart NC?

An update of my tee framework for dynamic AXL just in time for Pride, though there are no interesting pics to share. Sorry!

However, in support of the previous two items, a modder's tool: a CodePen to generate instances for the yaml. Both the SlutWear shirt(s) and the custom logo tees will require a lot of instances to get all of the color and logo combinations that are possible through dynamic AXL. There's still a little work to do, but it's already been of great use to me, as it wrote 220 lines of code for me. Let's not discuss how many lines of code I wrote to save those 220. 😂

Me using the tool to generate instances for the custom tees yaml. This will remove the limit on colors available to the user, so they can have any color with any of the logos!

VP (and Writing)

A glimpse at a set I took last week for inspo in the presidential PWP that's been stalled out at 5.7k words. More on it in a minute...

Even though the pics are cropped, they're still on the risque side, so I'm sticking them and the rest about the PWP behind the cut.

Not shown: Johnny both rolling his eyes at V and enjoying the show

I've been working on a PWP that was unrelated to the President's Merc AU for months now, but have been stuck because, well, I don't know how to wrap it up. I posted about it a little ways back and someone helpfully suggested that I just have to keep going until one of them passes out. Which, is what does happen, but I don't have that kind of patience to write it out and nearly 6k words is already well longer than my usual PWP, so I went in game to set the scene and possible prompt some ideas for a potenial ... climax to the scene.

It worked! I have a plan, and I think it won't take more than 500 words to reach the end, plus a few more touch-ups to help set up everything, then a rewrite or two for cleaning and polishing.

In the meantime, as I've been working through this version of Val and how she responds to Rosalind, it's the perfect prologue to The Tower story that I've been writing longhand. Val is going to leave this encounter fully loyal to Rosalind and will turn So Mi over with only a moment's hesitation. She doesn't have any attachments in this universe other than Misty and Vik, and after she wakes up to what Night City has become, it's easy for her to walk away from it forever. Especially when it puts her closer to Rosalind.

What about you? What are you working on? 👀

[starsfic]

DogDay is initially anxious and withdrawn after waking up in his new body and life, but the genuine care and support he gets from the Ranglers and mascots gradually helps him find his old optimistic spark again. Seeing his old friends slowly make a comeback one by one definitely helps. He gradually learns as time goes on that he doesn't have to always be the emotionally supportive one, and (most of) the other Critters are more than happy to return the emotional support he's given them in the past back to him. When CatNap revealed to the other Critters what was happening on August 8, 1995 as it was going down, all the other Critters had their reserves about the whole thing, but DogDay was the one to stand his ground and refuse to go along with it, which inspired the rest to follow suit.

Trying out a number of different hobbies he didn't have as much time for when PlayCo was just using him mainly for manual labor, DogDay has taken a particular interest in video games. In fact, he seems to find an odd comfort in playing horror games, including mascot horror games, either in spite of or because of his past, though he still gets enjoyment out of feel-good games on the side. After the Smiling Critters' inclusion at Indigo Park becomes public knowledge, DogDay starts his own gamer streaming channel and is known for always having positive things to say to his viewers no matter what genre of game he's playing.

Bubba Bubbaphant is the first Critter other than DogDay whose remains are found and used to transfer him to a new body, and DogDay was overjoyed to be shown this to be in the works, as it was the first concrete evidence that his friends may not be dead for good. Working for PlayCo, the Bigger Bodies Experiment based on Bubba would have his intellect and photographic memory (traits that got his former human self selected as a subject in the first place) used for problem solving skills, but he was given little to no freedom for real critical thinking and none at all for having opinions. So it takes him by surprise for a while when he's given full freedom of both by the Rangler staff. Bubba is, in turn, happy to occasionally contribute to the technical upkeep of the park and more than happy to jump in and assist in designing the new bodies of later recovered Critters. Bubba does enjoy gaming as well, albeit not to the extent of DogDay, and has a particular talent for puzzle games. DogDay would occasionally bring him on as a guest on his livestreams, to his initial embarrassment. Bubba's trunk on his Bigger Bodies form was fully functional, and the same is true for the trunk on his new form. Both were/are somewhat notably bigger on his face than what's depicted in his official artwork.

Bobby BearHug was the next one recovered (the news was broken to DogDay and Bubba by showing her recovered emblem as a humorous "late Valentine's Day" present). Bubba recalls the troubled production her Bigger Bodies Experiment form went through with multiple surgeries before she was able to properly move, sense the world, and ultimately even talk. Bubba had managed to discover the concept of ASL to communicate with her in the meantime, and all the Critters still remember how to this day, even CatNap (if this sounds like a PP fic prompt you still have in your ask box, there's a reason for that, lol). Similarly to DogDay, Bobby starts to learn that it's OK to put her own emotional needs first from time to time.

CraftyCorn (or just Crafty most of the time in conversation) came next. Like each newly remade Critter when first coming online, Crafty was a wary at first of the freedom the ones remade previously express in living how they want but grows to embrace that freedom. Funny enough, it's the park's designated "antagonist" Salem that draw's Crafty's attention by identifying as something other than girl or boy, something pretty much everyone around them supports and goes along with. This leads Crafty to explore their own gender identify and ultimately identifying exclusively as they/them, which the other Critters wholly support (albeit with Bobby jokingly "complaining" that she's back to being the only girl back at that point).

Crafty continues to express themself in creative endeavors, given even more creative freedom than PlayCo gave them. At times, this includes artwork with some disturbing imagery inspired by their past experiences, including things she witnessed during the Hour of Joy. The hired on-site therapist encourages this on the basis that it helps them process lingering unresolved feelings. Crafty creates puppet animation assets for themself and the other Critters, based stylistically somewhere between their old cartoon depictions and their current android forms, with eyes inspired more by the art style of Indigo Park's mascot designs. As I previously established, Rambley wasn't even aware until DogDay one day casually slid on screen next to him.

Hoppy Hopscotch came next, so Bobby was once more no longer the only girl in the gradually regrowing group. She was perhaps the most actively curious out of all the Critters getting revived and occasionally needed to be reigned in before the public could take notice until Indigo Park's legal team either influenced/proved their brand's shift to public domain or secured it for themselves (whichever of those two I go with). For a while, Hoppy would occasionally slip up and accidentally address Crafty as a girl before correcting herself. Apparently, she was ultimately caught as the Hour of Joy was still ongoing trying to spring-jump low-level employees caught in the massacre to safety.

KickinChicken (or just Kickin) was perhaps the most initially distrusting of the Rangler staff and park cast, not counting CatNap who had his own reasons. He was certain at first that he and the others were being lulled into a false sense of security and expected another proverbial shoe to drop. But gradually, he grew to realize the freedom and support they were getting now came from a genuine place. Kickin found Crafty identifying as neither boy nor girl and everyone allowing them to do so amusing, which ultimately led to him questioning himself. While being called a girl had some appeal, he still liked being called a boy. That's when he was told by Bubba, who spent time researching the subject to be a good ally, that bigender is a thing. Following this, Kickin would come out to the others by jokingly asking Crafty if he can have their old pronouns if they're not using them anymore. She has also taken to music, particularly singing and a little in songwriting. Heavy metal is a genre Kickin has gravitated towards, and he hopes to use it to process and express his feelings of past trauma.

PickyPiggy (alternatively, Picky Piggy, two words, or just Picky) has an initially awkward time adjusting to no longer having a body with a stomach, relying only on water. She always did enjoy baking and cooking food just as much as she did eating, however. According to her files, the human test subject who became her had apparently been given her own Owen the Oven to use, despite the toy having been pulled off the market due to multiple lawsuits over second- and third-degree burns. Even without taste buds nowadays, Picky has an intricate understanding of how to to combine ingredients well for tasty and filling meals; she's interested in pursuing nutritional science studies.

Nobody at Indigo Park knew CatNap was no longer an accepted member of the Smiling Critters group until they were already partway through designing his rebuild, mainly because the Critters were so cagey about addressing the alleged "former friend turned traitor" that it didn't even occur to them that said former friend was, himself, a Critter. Rambley was quite happy to show DogDay that the eight and final Critter was on his way to a comeback only to be surprised when met by a quiet yet forceful "No." They went through with it anyway, reasoning that CatNap was just a frightened kid forcibly turned into a living plaything like the rest of them and probably just needed proper adult guidance, to which DogDay reluctantly agreed on the grounds that CatNap be kept away from the rest for the time being.

CatNap is constantly kept on surveillance during his rehabilitation period and kept away from anything he could potentially use to harm others or possibly even himself. He is given a private room to himself, where he stays when he isn't being escorted around the Rangler areas, and he at one point calls it "a luxury suite compared to his old cage," but he hates that it's nicknamed "The Cathouse". Despite openly not wanting to be around CatNap, DogDay finds himself occasionally peeking in on him via his Crafty-made puppet-animated form and the screen in The Cathouse. For a while, this would typically lead to arguing matches, as both are unapologetic for their opposing actions back in 1995. Eventually, as time goes on and CatNap slowly and reluctantly alters his worldview, things start to cool down between the two during DogDay's virtual visits, though DogDay still isn't letting him forget he lost his legs to him.

The Critters all have artificially-generated voices modeled after voice clips of their characters, though some creative liberties have been taken for CatNap, since the most anyone could find of him was audio of snoring. They initially have no memories of their past human lives, aside from CatNap having second-hand knowledge from the Prototype. But as they undergo therapy sessions and explore themselves over time, bits and pieces come back to them every so often in their dreams. Interestingly, they rediscover that they all sort of knew each other before the experiments to some degree or another. Even Theo, CatNap's former life who was noted for a lack of friends at PlayCare, has some memories of Neil, DogDay's former life, trying to connect with him, though DogDay seemingly regains those memories first. Perhaps that past attempt to make friends subconsciously made CatNap's betrayal sting all the more.

OOH, this is all so great!

Is the "DogDay plays video games" inspired by that one YouTuber who has started playing as DogDay? I know it would be complex, given the whole copyright issue, but maybe it would be fun for Indigo Park to draw attention via its characters streaming and playing video games!

[newsmutproject]

Call for Submissions: Erato II

Send us your most seductive flash fiction and prose poetry*!

We’re seeking super short writing in any subgenre, featuring characters of any and every orientation and gender, so long as they’re 18+ and express their consent to all erotic activities. Whether they find pleasure through BDSM, fetish, or vanilla encounters; in long-term romances or one-night stands; with one person, a roomful of people, or just themselves, it’s all good.

How explicitly you want to portray the sex, and what counts as sex, is up to you - but leave the reader in some way breathless.

Vivid writing, clever and original plots, and stylistic or structural experimentation are particularly welcome. We want stories that are sex positive, body positive, and inclusive. Usually at least half the stories in our anthologies feature characters who are LGBTQIA+, including the ace spectrum.

BIPOC writers, trans and nonbinary writers, disabled writers, working-class writers, and writers of other marginalized and underrepresented identities are warmly encouraged to submit. We’re thrilled to work with writers from around the world at any stage of their careers, including those who have never been published before.

*Please note, prose poetry, not verse poetry. We share some inspiring verse poetry on our blog, but don’t publish it—yet.

We’re also interested in excerpts from longer works, including sex scenes from stories in a genre other than erotica. 

Payment & Length:

We’ll pay $25 for the first 500 words and 2 cents per word thereafter, up to $45 for 1,500 words. 

Please include wordcount with your submission. We’re willing to look at slightly longer stories, so long as they still fit the spirit of ‘flash fiction’ (e.g., if you’re at 1,575 words and can’t find more to trim), but payment is capped at $45.

Accepted pieces shorter than 500 words will receive $25.

All contributors will also receive an ebook copy of the anthology and a discount on paperback copies.

For a taste of our tastes, check out our first flash anthology, Erato, and our blog – but we love to be surprised by new concepts, and we actively want to expand the range of identities and perspectives we publish with each book.

You can also read two of the pieces from Erato for free online - both award winners!  

“A Study in Circuits and Charcoal” by jem zero won the Best Feminist Sex category of the Good Sex Awards.

“Touch” by D. Fostalove was a runner-up in the Best Sexy Talk category.

More details and tips below the cut:

Submissions open: April 2 – August 31, 2023 (Extensions can be made upon request.)

We’ll send a confirmation email (manually) within a week of receiving your story. Please query or resend if you don’t see this confirmation in <7 days. 

Acceptances won’t be sent until the submissions period ends and all stories have been considered. Some rejections may be sent out sooner.

Publication date: Early 2024

Some tips to save you time --

Our hard-ons:

All stories will be copyedited before going to print, but well-polished submissions have some advantage. Here’s a guide to dialogue punctuation - getting it right can save lots of editing time (it also shows you paid attention to these guidelines).

We strongly prefer 1 character’s POV per scene unless you’re doing something incredible with an omniscient narrator. Use scene breaks to change POV rather than ‘head hopping’.

We don’t require, but do enjoy, stories that feature realistic sexuality, including safer sex.

Throughout our blog, we share lots of stuff we find interesting about sexuality and would love to see reflected in submissions! For instance: do you know how excited we’d be to publish a story about a character with vaginismus? (Hint: very!)

We’re eager to see sympathetic and sensual depictions of people who are often poorly represented in mainstream smut. Just to start with, this includes Black people, Indigenous people, and other people of color, trans women (as well as trans men and nonbinary people, but we want to especially recognize the impact of transmisogyny), disabled people, and fat people, as well as the many people who belong to more than one marginalized group. Writers of these backgrounds are warmly encouraged to submit. 

Some of our favorite erotic flash fiction opens in the middle of sex. However you do it (and there are many ways to do it), grab the reader’s attention from the first lines.

However short the flash, there’s always room for the ingredients that take a sex scene from a list of mechanical actions to an interaction between multidimensional characters. Some writers get creative by choosing to omit one of those tools, like dialogue - this can work too! We certainly don’t mandate dialogue, or descriptions of textures and scents, or whatnot. But if you’re looking at your story and feel it might be missing something, the Sex Writing 101 list can be useful.

We’re interested in erotic narratives that build or explore a consent culture.  We want to see affirmative consent, whether expressed through a verbal “yes” (or a “maybe, let’s try” or “yes for now”), through action & collaboration (returning their partner’s kiss, guiding their hands to where they want them, etc.), or telepathy. “Enthusiastic consent” can be a fuzzy target (who decides what counts as ‘enthusiasm’? does it leave room for more cautious experimentation or other nuances?), but we’re never going to reject a story because its characters seem too eager and excited to have sex with each other.

All sex that takes place in the action of the story must be consensual. However, stories about characters who have survived sexual coercion or trauma will certainly be considered.

At the New Smut Project, we’re looking for thoughtful stories that explore sex as a positive force in people’s lives. The overall tone of our anthologies tends toward the optimistic, although there’s definitely room for stories that are nuanced, bittersweet, and even gently tragic (both our Good Sex Award winners, linked above, are strong examples of stories that are bittersweet, mixing challenges with reason for hope - and have we mentioned scorching-hot sexiness?). Hope and defiance are very sexy. 

References to other literature, art, music, and more are awesome. Brainy is sexy. Nerdy is sexy. Do keep in mind we can’t publish outright fanfiction unless it’s of a work in the public domain. But we are all about erotic retellings of Shakespeare, or the Epic of Gilgamesh, or what have you.

Right now for Erato II, we’d love to fit in more super-short pieces (500 words and shorter) with intense feeling and imagery - prose with the impact of poetry.

Hard sells and hard nos: 

Our upper limit of 1,500 words isn’t firm because we want to make writers’ lives easier: we know there are times when you aimed for flash, overshot, but trying to trim more words could remove something significant or take more time than it’s worth. Remember, though, this is still a flash fiction anthology, so we can’t include stories that exceed the limit by more than a few hundred words. (The reason we’re not saying how exactly how many more is because that would become a new upper limit that’s not necessarily firm...ad infinitum. If you need a hard limit, aim for <1,500.) 

No coercion as part of the action of the story (as mentioned, it might form part of a character’s history, sensitively handled and not for titillation). This means no characters badgering each other into an activity or characters being “obligated” by circumstances. We’d also prefer not to see sex between teachers and students or doctors/therapists and patients. Especially gross and deliberate violations of the consent guideline may result in your email address being blocked without notice. Don’t troll us. (If you’re not a troll, don’t worry; the kinds of things we block for are not written or sent by accident.) 

No sexually active characters under the age of 18. 

Stories about deception (including infidelity) are very hard sells. Like many of our hard sells, these ideas are worth exploring in literature but often aren’t a good fit with our focus on sex as a positive force in people’s lives.

We appreciate bittersweet stories, but aren’t fans of when tragedy seems like a “punishment” inflicted on the characters for having sex. If characters have contempt for each other in place of sexual tension or the story ends with a death, it’s likely too grim for us (at the same time, stories about desire mingled with grief, pleasure in the face of impending loss, or ghosts with vibrant sex after-lives can be a great fit and are of personal interest to editor T.C. Mill). 

Stories about a character being seduced by someone who turns out to be a vampire, demon, or serial killer and then - surprise! - gets killed/eaten/tortured/dragged to Hell are not a good fit. Cryptid boyfriends (and lovers of other genders) are great, we just don’t want to see them tricking and preying on their partners; that’s not exactly sex positive consent culture in action. 

Other concepts we’re not thrilled to see: stories where characters have sex while very intoxicated/high, stories about sex robots (vs robots who happen to have sex; it’s a key distinction!), and stories where characters have sex because they are hired to (our focus is on different motives for sex; we welcome pieces about sex worker protagonists in their personal lives). Stories with other premises will be much more competitive in the submissions pile. 

Don’t send stories based in transphobia, homophobia, racism, sexism, ableism, fatphobia, and other asshole moves (but it’s fine to send stories acknowledging these prejudices as part of a character’s lived experience).

We can’t accept writing or characters you don’t hold the copyright to (this has been a particular issue with quoted song lyrics. Please only quote lyrics you have written yourself or know to be in the public domain. It also now includes AI-generated text). As mentioned, intertextuality with public domain works is wonderful, though, so bring on the erotic Great Gatsby retellings!

Unlike many publishers, we’re willing to consider stories we rejected from previous calls. It’s best to be upfront about what you’re re-sending and why you believe it might be a fit for us this time around (if the story has been substantially revised, if it received a personal rejection lamenting that we just couldn't fit it in a prior anthology, etc.). Also, be upfront with yourself about whether you have other ideas for stories to submit and if you’re certain you understand the kinds of stories we publish. 

Multiple submissions: We’ll look at 1 or 2 stories per author. You don’t need to send both stories at the same time, but if you are submitting 2 stories at once, feel free to do so as 2 attachments to a single email (easier for us to keep track of).

Simultaneous submissions: Please let us know in your cover email if your story is also under consideration elsewhere. Keep in mind that we’ll hold stories we’re considering at least until September 1, 2023 (and likely later, as it can take some time to make final decisions about which stories we’ll publish).

Reprints: Happily considered! So are translations of stories into English and excerpts from longer pieces. We especially enjoy republishing older stories (reviving those which have gone out of print) and love to look at sexy scenes excerpted from longer stories in genres that aren’t erotica. In your cover email, please give us the details and confirm that you can offer us reprint rights. 

How to submit: Send your story to newsmutproject(at)gmail.com as a .doc/.docx or .rtf file, a Google Drive link, or in the body of the email. In the subject line, include the story’s title and “Erato Submission” to keep your email safe from the spam filter.

We’re not picky about format, but anything resembling Shunn’s Modern Manuscript Format works especially well. However you do it, please include wordcount somewhere on the first page. This info helps us organize the stories we’re considering.

Provide your cover letter in the body of the email, not as an additional attachment. If you’re unsure what to put in your cover letter, no sweat. We don’t need much, but Strange Horizons’s tips are excellent. If authors are comfortable declaring marginalized identities that have informed their writing in their cover letters, we appreciate knowing this and will not disclose the information to others (it’s up to you what you feel safe and comfortable sharing in your published author biography and promotional interviews - and in your cover letter; all this is optional).  

Also, we appreciate hearing in your cover letter about where you learned of this call for submissions! Big thanks to everyone who’s done this so far - it helps us know where to promote future anthology calls.

Submissions will be read by T.C. Mill (she/her) and Guinevere Chase (she/her). 

Questions, updates, and more information: Contact us with questions and suggestions at newsmutproject(at)gmail.com. Answers to frequently asked questions are posted in the q&a tag on this blog. For updates and more info, you can sign up for our newsletter through MailChimp, follow us here on Tumblr, and/or follow us on Twitter (much less active).

[justgrey]

OMG OMG OMG!! Okay so, I had this idea. Imagine Medic with a daughter (or child if you'd like to keep in gender neutral) except this kid is a clone of him! I think she'd be in her mid to late teens during their time in Mann Co, so how do you think Medic would be with a cloned version of himself as a kid? TYSM!!!

I'm gonna keep this gender neutral, I like keeping things as inclusive as possible when it comes to things like the gender of the reader because I know what it feels like to find a good fic and then get a little down because the description of the reader isn't you, it's somebody else lol.

Also I'm playing around with formatting so if things look different it's cause I'm experimenting 😋

Medic & Teen Reader that is his little clone - Headcannons (Platonic)

Warning : Mentions of human experimentation

At first, he has no damn clue what to do with this kid he created by cloning himself.

To be honest, he had no idea that his kooky experiment would actually work that well. He didn't think you'd make it to 3-years-old, let alone your mid teenage years.

Whatever, either way you'd have a scalpel in your hands by age 6. He's not mentally sound enough to raise a child but he's going to try his best and you love him for it.

During yours and Medic's time at Mann Co, everything got like, a lot weirder. I mean, hanging around a group of crazy dudes all trying to make a living isn't normal, and that's without even looking Merasmus' way 💀

Medic would encourage you to watch him experiment on his teammates and would point things out like organs or other specific parts of the body, and he'd quiz you about it later, wanting to see if you'll be able to keep up with him when you inevitably become a medic yourself (He hopes)

Yeah, unlike most of the mercs, Medic would want you to go down his path, the path of, "Medicinal study," whether it's more on the illegal side or the legal one. He'd keep teaching you even if you told him you weren't interested.

I don't know, he just strikes me as the kind of dad that wants his kid to follow loosely in his footsteps.

Heavy would most likely refer to you as, "Little doctor," or something along those lines because he sees you the most out of all of the mercs as he probably visits Medic more than the others.

Being Medic's kid at this time would also mean that you are required to attend Pyro's tea parties. I don't care what anybody says, you are obligated to attend and be their buddy.

Medic tries to keep you out of Pyro's sight but it's too late, Pyro has already declared you as their new best friend and will menacingly glare at Medic until he let's you play hide and seek with them.

Being his kid and clone would also probably mean that Archimedes and the other doves probably go to you for comfort and love because you remind them so much of Medic.

Medic would treat you almost like an experiment for the first few years until he develops an attachment and fatherly love for you, his dearest creation.

He's never really felt an attachment like that so he'd definitely study that too. You're one big experiment that he grows to love spending time with and adore. He is so proud of how far you've come, he might even start showing you off to the other mercs, bragging about how cool his kid is.

[rruhlreviews]

Book Review - The Bromance Book Club by Lyssa Kay Adams

I must preface this review with the fact I have a certificate in women and gender studies.

Some context is important when discussing the success of this book. This novel was a blockbuster on BookTok, so we need to examine what makes something a sensation for the BookTok audience. The basic elements of a BookTok success are a high concept, diverse representation, a heavy emphasis on tropes, and use of contemporary language and/or pop culture references. Strong plot or character arcs are a secondary focus of the BookTok audience.

A story about a baseball player sports-bro who has to read regency romance to be a better husband. This high concept is the selling point of this novel. What makes this appealing to BookTok? Toxic masculinity is a hot topic in society right now. Despite being parents, the characters are young, which appeals to the burgeoning new adult audience. We’ve got feminism and a strong female lead who loves art and activism. Sports romance is popular as well. I can see how an online audience who’s used to the jargon online would think the author was clever for using terms like “mansplaining.”

The premise was appealing and I was genuinely excited to read the book. I appreciate what the author was attempting to do! The part with Gavin doing the grand gesture and Thea playfully saying she wanted to was very sweet. Unfortunately, thepremise fell short of its potential for me. Contemporary romance isn't my typical read (though I have read and enjoyed it before), yet I went into this with an open mind. My reaction can best be summarized by: when I learned this was a BookTok fav, all of the criticisms I had made a lot more sense. BookTok is a site where trends change constantly and the media consumption cycle lasts a month if you’re lucky. How to market to this constantly shifting audience? Sell them bite-sized ideas. Emphasize tropes. A new take on the sports romance. Useless man fights for empowered wife. Unpacking toxic masculinity. Woke romance. Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, but it’s done in a feminist way this time, we promise.

Have I mentioned I don’t ascribe to the whole idea of gender?

I digress. My point is, the entire book seemed to be just these few tropes and premises. The narrative never got into the emotional depth I needed to make me care about the characters. Miscommunication as a plot device can be done well, but if you removed it from The Bromance Book Club, the entire narrative would fall apart. If the reader ever stops to wonder if men and women aren’t from two different planets, the narrative falls apart. I’m not making excuses for Gavin being oblivious to his wife’s happiness, but I must point out that Thea never communicated either. She told him to leave, so he did, then she was mad at him because he wasn’t supposed to actually leave.

The plot and characterization were weak. I was interested in Thea’s trauma, but it seemed to be glossed over to push a heavy-handed “strong woman” theme. It’s like a cake made out of all frosting. That’s the thing. BookTok wants easily consumed frosting, not a cake that requires a longer attention span or the contemplation of important concepts such as diversity and inclusion beyond a surface-level discussion. Being able to check off boxes on a representation clipboard doesn’t make a book a strong story, but that would be news to BookTok. I hate the term “woke” because it misses every single point of real social justice work, ergo it is the perfect term to describe the attempt at feminism in The Bromance Book Club, which didn't feel super feminist at all. Ultimately, the tension and comedy in the book rely on the belief that women and men are inherently different, and if you and your partner struggle to speak the same love language, it isn't a communication issue but a gender issue. Honestly, while reading, I kept thinking about the sitcom Home Improvement from the 90s which I know wasn't the intended effect. Mentally, I call this phenomenon "girlboss feminism," where the quest to create a strong female lead falls back on buzzwords and a couple tropes and ultimately has little new or interesting to say about gender.

The voice in The Bromance Book Club was a voice I recognized from other BookTok successes I’ve read. Its attempt to be witty was just edgy. The voice was self-aware, ironic, and almost felt to be poking fun at the genre as a whole, which made me wary of its sincerity. It's like when a musical has a character point out "why is everyone singing?" Personally, I'm a fan of just enjoying a genre without breaking the immersion. We’re all here to read it because we know and enjoy the general formula, and you don’t need to hit us over the head with anything. Additionally, there were sections where the author's voice bled through and it felt more like reading a rant about injustice than a story.

As a final nitpick, Courting the Countess used the phrase “male gaze” at one point and I was irked by the anachronistic language. It’s 1820, not 2020.

In conclusion, while the high concept and premise of The Bromance Book Club caught my attention, it fell short of its potential, trading a dynamic plot and characters for appealing buzzwords and a superficial attempt to discuss feminism. Because of the culture on BookTok which desires speed, surface-level representation, genre fiction that “isn’t like other genre fiction,” and easily consumed media, it was the perfect favorite for that audience. The book ultimately lacked sincerity to my eye. It felt to be showing off how not like other romances it was, and lost the heartfelt storytelling for me. TikTok as a site is all about flashy appearances with less depth.

Here I am, turning an unrelated piece of writing into a rant about society after criticizing The Bromance Book Club for doing the same thing. But this discussion is indeed part of a larger concern of mine. I worry about BookTok's potential to influence a trend of declining quality in the fiction market. I worry about the negative impact on the mental health of its userbase, afraid to show or feel things against the status quo.

Maybe I'm just not in the target audience, in which case these criticisms mean little. Maybe I read it as trying to be more than it actually was. In any case, it just wasn't for me, and that's okay, and I'm free to pick up another contemporary romance with different themes. This book certainly achieved what it meant to achieve, given its success, which I respect.

[fbenvs3000f24]

Unit 3 Blog Post

What role does “privilege” play in nature interpretation? Please include your working definition of privilege.

As nature interpreters our goal is to connect with an audience to communicate the wonders of the natural world while educating about specific aspects of our environment. It is very easy to get wrapped up in our learning/teaching styles and ideas for new ways to be an interpreter. However, when all of our focus is on how to best communicate our knowledge, it may be even easier to forget to consider privilege (which is a privilege in itself). In my opinion, privilege is defined as the advantages given to a person based on their race, gender, orientation, class, education level, and other factors. Notice the use of given in the previous sentence. Privilege is not something that people work for but something handed to them by society. When we fail to consider the effects of privilege on people's perspectives, we are failing to be proper interpreters.

As discussed in Unit 3 of this course, and as Peggy McIntish suggested, every person has an “invisible backpack” that we carry around every day. Invisible backpacks are basically our tool kits for getting through life. All of our privilege is held in them and can be used as needed for an easier life. While reading through this chapter of our course I was able to take some time to reflect on my invisible backpack and the privilege that I have. 

Growing up I always had access to nature through summer camps, camping trips, vacations, and kayaking on the river near my house. I realize that all of these are opportunities provided to me by privilege as not everyone has the ability to attend camps, have access to kayaks and camping supplies, and vacations. I grew up with parents that were able to fund these opportunities who also shared similar interests for the outdoors. Due to this, nature was always accessible to me. This is not the case for everyone though,  which is where privilege in nature interpretation comes into play. 

Because of my privilege, I was able to grow up with perceptions and experiences with nature that not everyone has. Privilege influences the way we see the world. When interpreting nature we must be sure to make things accessible for everyone so that everyone has the same opportunities to experience it. It is important to consider the experiences that each member of our audience has had in order to be as inclusive as possible. For example if we were to lead a camping trip for a group of teenagers; Maybe some have grown up going camping with their families multiple times a year, and maybe some have never been in a tent. Obviously the first-time campers are going to be more apprehensive and maybe even intimidated by the whole experience which could make them feel isolated on the trip. It is our job as interpreters to take the time and make sure everyone is comfortable no matter their experience level. 

The effects of privilege can be very clearly seen in the experiences that people have had with nature. While interpreting nature it is crucial to consider this in order to make a positive learning environment for everyone involved.

[mademoiselle-red]

Reading the Renault fandom dissertation, part 4: the online TC fandom analysis begins…

An academic decided to write about us, online fans of Mary Renault’s works, for her phd dissertation in 2018, and as the subject of her research, I will be covering & commenting on what she wrote over a series of posts ✍️📑 (Here is part 1, part 2, part 3, part 5, and part 6)

For part 4, we begin to delve into Chou’s analysis of the online TC fandom, which she calls the “millennial fandom” because it sprung up in the new millennium (the mid-2000s).

“While Renault’s works have mostly lost their relevance for readers of historical fiction and gay literature, Renault has found a new fandom in internet communities. On LiveJournal.com, the social networking website that has been a platform for many fandom communities since 1999, there are two major communities devoted to Renault and her works: maryrenaultfics (since 2004) and maryrenault (2005). While these communities have become less active due to decreasing popularity of LiveJournal itself, Renault fandom is still active on more recent fandom platforms such as Tumblr and Archive of Our Own”

So far this checks out. These are all the places we have congregated in.

“Renault’s new fans are not the “older gay men” who have gone digital, nor are they the “serious-minded teenagers” interested in classical times, or the academics who are finally paying the author her long-overdue attention. The cult popularity that Renault’s works achieved in the community of online fan “prosumers,” especially for those who are interested in “slash”—fantasy about male homoeroticism largely produced for and by women—demands a renewed examination of how Renault’s works could be reread and re-evaluated.”

I’m pretty sure there are middle aged men, academics, and serious minded history-obsessed teens among us. But cis women (and bisexual folks) do comprise half of the fandom (according to an informal poll I ran a while back).

“According to Fanlore Wiki, one of the largest Wikipedia websites about English- speaking fan activities, one of Renault’s LiveJournal community has been in existence since 2004, aptly named “Mary’s Handmaidens.” On the Fanlore page about “Mary’s Handmaidens,” a passage describes the gender and sexual constituent of the online community: “The community includes members of both sexes, with (by comparison with many other fandoms) a notable contingent of men, though the majority of writers of fan fiction are women. Various sexual orientations are represented among the membership.” The statement about a “notable contingent of men” is a curious one compared to the “handmaidens” in the title of the community. Despite its consciously inclusive taglines (“the community includes members of both sexes”, “various sexual orientations are represented”), the community adopts a female persona as its identity.”

This is a fair point! The handmaidens group name really wasn’t inclusive. And cis women did and still do comprise the largest group in Renault fandoms (and slash fandoms in general).

“Another example of Renault’s Internet fandom is The Theban Band’s fan arts based on Renault’s novels (see fig. 4). Among fan artworks on Renault’s works by The Theban Band, one piece based on The Charioteer illustrates serial lines of flights from the fans to Renault, from Renault to her characters, and then from her characters to antiquity (see fig. 5). The artwork demonstrates the fantastical disposition of the simultaneous disidentification and cross- identification with otherness, which in the scene depicted is embodied in a leap to another time and place. This artwork captures the moment in which Ralph and Laurie’s flirtatious book-exchange takes place in The Charioteer.”

What about this above image demonstrates disidentification and cross-identification with its subject matter? It appears to be a just a faithful visual rendition of the scene from the novel.

“If Ralph is attempting to initiate Laurie to homosexuality, it is interesting that the knowledge of homosexuality that he passes on (instead of homosexuality itself) is explained as a fantasy. In this scene of erotic initiation of a young boy, the only physical contact between the two characters is through a book that is “just a nice idea.” In the same scene, the two are depicted as dangerously close to a kiss In the passage, Ralph merely makes an “outward movement” and then steps back. What takes place in between, the “[h]alf-remembered images” of “the tents of Troy, the columns of Athens, David waiting in an olive grove for the sound of Jonathan’s bow” preoccupy Laurie’s mind strangely more so than the immediate presence of Ralph.”

I guess she is on the no-kiss team for chapter 2. 😚

“Together with the Phaedrus that Laurie physically receives, the fantasy of a homoerotic past mediates the modern, homosexual relationship between Laurie and Ralph throughout the entire story. In this sense, Phaedrus functions for the two characters much like how Renault’s books function for her readers. The Charioteer is an adoring look to the past clothed as a story about the inner struggles of a modern homosexual, or, more precisely, about how the struggles must be negotiated through a fantasy of the past. Renault’s books were for her mid-century gay readers “a badge of homosexuality” in much the same way Plato’s Phaedrus is for Ralph and Laurie: a communication about desire in the present through a collective fantasy of a past that contains the ideal form of that desire. […] Laurie looks back into a mythical past in order to contextualize his homosexuality, and Renault herself turns to the idea of Greek Love to write about male homoeroticism. In a similar way, the 21st-century fans locate in Renault’s works a kind of male homoeroticism that seems unavailable in the here and now of post-gay sexual politics.”

What are post-gay sexual politics? In what way precisely is the kind of male homoeroticism in Renault’s works, and in TC in particular (since this passage focuses on TC) no longer available in the here and now? While things have improved a lot for queer people, especially here in the west, homophobia has not gone away! Do all LGBTQ people in the Americas and Europe (where Renault’s books are published) no longer face familial and social ostracism after coming out? Readers both in the old livejournal and here on tumblr have mentioned how they could relate to TC because they come from homophobic families and communities. Through TC and the Greek novels, people can read about characters experiencing similar emotions and situations, across time, space and sometimes gender, and feel comforted, knowing that they are not alone, that this love exists, it is real, and it will find a way.

“The three-fold leap in time for Renault’s millennial fans constitutes a fantasy that is thrice removed from the “reality” of sexual desire. If Ralph and Laurie could be said to negotiate their own identity through an ancient Greek philosopher, and if as critics have argued, Renault masks her own lesbian identity by male homoeroticism located both temporally and cultural distant from her own, it is much more difficult to argue that there is a sexual truth being filtered through Plato, Renault’s characters, and finally Renault herself for the millennial fans.”

While Laurie & Ralph and the mid-century gay readers use The Phaedrus / The Charioteer to communicate their sexuality through “a collective fantasy of a past that contains the ideal form of that desire”, the “millennial fans”, according to Chou, are too far removed from the “reality” of sexual desire to receive “a sexual truth.” This assumes that the millennial fans do not use The Charioteer to explore and understand their own sexuality and cannot relate their own sexual realities to the same-sex desires depicted in the novel. This, as I said in the paragraph above, is not true, since many readers in these online communities do identify as LGBTQ+ and can relate to LGBTQ+ experiences. It is true that many of the millennial fans are not specifically gay men using these gay books to reveal their sexualities to each other. And there are indeed straight women among us, but in my experience, we are definitely NOT a majority straight-women group. Most of us are queer people who, like Ralph/Laurie and the mid-century gay readers, have found each other through this book (as friends and as lovers ❤️)

My commentary on Chou’s online TC fandom analysis continues in part 5, and a tumblr username familiar to many of us here makes a surprising appearance in the dissertation 👀👀👀

[makers-muse]

Tips for Encouraging Girls to Start Coding Early 

When Maya was just eight years old, she discovered a fascination with how her favorite video games worked. Her parents, noticing her curiosity, decided to introduce her to coding. They enrolled her in an after-school coding club where she was one of the few girls. At first, Maya felt unsure, but with the encouragement of her teacher and the support of her parents, she began to see coding not just as something she could do, but as something she loved. Maya’s journey highlights the importance of early exposure to coding for girls, setting the foundation for future success in technology. 

Why Start Coding Early? 

Introducing girls to coding at a young age is essential for developing problem-solving skills, creativity, and confidence. According to research by the American Association of University Women (AAUW), girls who engage in STEM activities early on are more likely to pursue these fields in the future. Early exposure helps break down the stereotypes that coding is “only for boys” and allows girls to see themselves as capable coders from the start. 

Practical Tips for Encouraging Girls to Code 

Make Coding Fun and Relatable 

The best way to spark a girl’s interest in coding is to make it fun. Use platforms like Scratch or Code.org that turn coding into a game-like experience. These tools allow girls to create stories, animations, and games, making coding a creative outlet rather than just a technical skill. 

Encourage your daughter or students to build projects based on their interests, whether it’s creating a game with their favorite characters or designing an app that helps solve a problem they care about. When coding is connected to their passions, girls are more likely to stay engaged and motivated. 

Introduce Role Models and Mentors 

Seeing women who have succeeded in tech can inspire girls to pursue coding. Introduce your daughter or students to female role models in the field. This could be through books, videos, or even local coding clubs where women in tech share their experiences. 

Mentorship is another powerful tool. Studies show that girls with mentors are more likely to continue in STEM fields. If possible, connect girls with female mentors who can guide them, answer questions, and encourage them along their coding journey. 

Create a Supportive Environment 

Girls often feel more comfortable exploring coding when they are in a supportive and encouraging environment. As a parent or educator, create a space where girls feel safe to ask questions, make mistakes, and try new things. Celebrate their successes and help them learn from challenges without fear of judgment. 

You can also foster a supportive community by encouraging girls to join coding clubs or groups where they can collaborate with other girls. These communities provide a sense of belonging, which is crucial in retaining girls in coding programs. 

Use Gender-Neutral Language and Examples 

The way we talk about coding can have a big impact on how girls perceive it. Avoid language that reinforces stereotypes, such as referring to coders as “he” or using examples that only boys might find interesting. Instead, use gender-neutral language and examples that appeal to a wide range of interests. 

For instance, instead of saying, “Let’s build a robot that plays football,” try “Let’s design a robot that can play your favorite sport.” This small change in wording can make coding feel more inclusive and accessible to girls. 

Encourage Persistence and Resilience 

Coding can be challenging, especially for beginners. Encourage girls to view coding as a process of trial and error, where mistakes are a natural part of learning. Teach them to approach problems with a growth mindset, understanding that persistence and practice lead to improvement. 

Share stories of successful women in tech who overcame obstacles and kept going despite challenges. This can help girls see that coding is not about being perfect but about continually learning and growing. 

The Long-Term Benefits of Early Coding 

Starting coding early not only builds technical skills but also fosters critical thinking, creativity, and resilience skills that are valuable in any career. Girls who begin coding young are more likely to pursue STEM degrees and careers, contributing to a more diverse and innovative tech industry. 

Programs like Black Girls Code and Girls Who Code have shown that early exposure to coding can lead to long-term success in technology. These programs emphasize the importance of starting early and providing girls with the resources, mentorship, and support they need to thrive in coding. 

Start the Journey Today 

Encouraging girls to start coding early is a powerful way to empower them for the future. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, or mentor, you can play a crucial role in guiding girls on their coding journey. 

Join us at Makers Muse to explore coding resources, mentorship opportunities, and supportive communities designed to help girls succeed. Start the journey today and watch as they grow into confident, creative coders! 

Do you have questions regarding our STEM program?

Contact us anytime.

Take your first step into the magical world of coding for kids

[tedwardremus]

You know, I’ve noticed something interesting about those who love to give redemption arcs or make Draco and Regulus look superior compared to the female leads, they all seem to give redemption arcs to white fictional character. Now if Draco and Regulus were poc’s do you think they would as many people writing redemption arcs for them? Nope.

Then these same people turn the character gay to make them more inclusive… and then bash their female canon partners.

As someone who’s gen z and worked with different generations, I have to say my generation is the most racist, misogynistic, narcissistic, delusional, unprofessional, and the stupidest generation of all time. Their skull are so thick and you can’t get anything through to them unless you agree with them. High school and university was a nightmare with these condescending idiots.

Wow! This was quiet the ask to wake up to this morning!

The great thing about a fandom as vast as Harry Potter is that you can always find people who share your interpretations and create content that resonates with what you want to see. Focus on those spaces. Curate your fandom experience by engaging with content and people who make this journey enjoyable for you.

Redemption arcs are a compelling trope, popular for a reason, but they require effort to be done well. Exploring how characters like Draco and Regulus seek redemption isn’t a bad idea. My issue lies with the tendency to overlook the fact that these characters willingly and enthusiastically chose to be bigots in the first place, which is why they need redemption. I’m more interested in stories that acknowledge the horrible actions they took rather than those that paint them as innocent victims who were simply misled by abusive families.

That said, my taste in fanfiction isn’t everyone’s taste. If I come across something I’m not into, I just scroll past it. I prefer to focus on content that interests me or supports my friends because I find tremendous joy in uplifting their work.

Would fandom’s relationship with Draco and Regulus change if they were characters of color rather than what we typically imagine as attractive, wealthy white boys? I don’t doubt it.

Exploring characters' sexuality, gender, and ethnic backgrounds is part of the fun of fandom. If a creator wants to see themselves represented in the story and do so by reimagining characters and storylines, that’s fantastic! Can unconscious biases seep in and lead to the erasure of women or other groups? Yes, it can happen. But it doesn’t happen all the time. We must encourage each other to be aware of our biases and improve upon the world-building and character development of the series and not fall into the same racist/sexist traps that the author, who shall not be named, did. It takes a lot of effort and self-awareness to do so, but that's why being a part of a supportive community in fandom is great. We can benefit from listening to each other and helping each other on our journey to be more sensitive and inclusive writes.

Finally, here’s a little secret about Gen Z—you aren’t that special.

You’re not more racist than the generations who enacted Jim Crow laws, supported an Islamophobic-driven war on terror, or cut welfare benefits out of fear that Black women were gaming the system.

What you’re experiencing is the reality that people, regardless of age or political alignment, can be selfish, rude, and self-serving. But here’s the good news: people of all ages are also capable of being smart, selfless, caring, supportive, and wonderful. Hold on to those people and focus your energy on those who bring you joy.

If you want to see a more positive community with less selfless people, then be part of the change. Treat others with kindness and patience. Don't disparage an entire generation of being stupid and thick-skulled because that just isn't true because right now, with this message that you chose to send me, you sound like someone who could use a lesson in treating others with respect.

I am sorry to hear your educational experience wasn't enjoyable. Hopefully you will find that our teen years and twenties do not define us and that a lot of people grow out of being assholes and your workplace experience is filled with new and wonderful people.

Studies show that Gen Z is far more inclusive than previous generations so you should feel hopeful, not hateful, toward your peers. You’re the most diverse generation in American history. Only 52% of Gen Z is white, only 26% identify as exclusively straight, and only 20% identify as politically conservative.

[totally-sapphic-posts]

Hi :)

I'm the anon who sent you the little confession a few days ago and I was wondering if you have any advice for me. Whilst it was the first time I admitted I'm struggling with this, it's not new at all. It's been a struggle for as long as I can remember, but definitely since hitting puberty (which is like 10-15 years ago), and I feel like I've still made no progress in figuring myself out.

My relationship with my body is kinda weird. Some days I feel like it's a sack of potatoes I have to drag around, other days I kinda like it. It's like I'm a puzzle. Right now everything fits together well and it makes the picture that is me, but there are certain individual pieces that I really don't like. If I were to change them however, what happens to the big picture? It feels like either those new pieces wont fit with the rest or all the pieces have to change, completely changing the picture, and I don't think I like either of those options.

I'm extremely lucky in that my environment is quite progressive and self expression generally isn't frowned upon at all. So I can more or less wear whatever I want and I've convinced myself that that's enough for me, but there's always this lingering feeling inside of me that if it weren't for others, I might've done things differently.

Anyways, it feels nice to get that off my chest, so thanks :)

I'll start off by saying that I can only give advice from my perspective and experience, and that I in no way know everything or even the best way to approach this. In saying that, I would love if others who have different perspectives could maybe comment theirs.

Onto the advice :))

One perspective I know many people take is analysing where your feelings of discomfort in yourself may be coming from.

I have found that even in queer communities and trans communities, we're just upholding gender stereotypes which fuels a lot of gender identity questioning. In fact, I saw a post a few days ago where a woman who dresses fairly masculine and appears adrogynous was talking about how she's constantly addressed by strangers with 'they/them' pronouns. On one hand, she loves the inclusivity and that traditional male/female pronouns aren't the default anymore, but on the other hand she felt that there was an entirely other box that has been created. People saw her, saw that she didn't express herself in a typical female way, but not quite male either, so strangers keep labelling her as a they/them.

I even found personally that I struggled a lot with my gender identity because even in trans communities, we uphold gender stereotypes. I had to do a lot of self-searching and figure out that I'm just typically very masculine presenting and enjoy stereotypically masculine things. My friends are majority male, and that's just how it is. That doesn't make me a man, and doesn't make me a they/them either. I'm just me. With whichever way I choose to express myself, I'm just me.

Try out pronouns you like and feel comfortable with, dress how you want, act in ways that make you feel comfortable, enjoy your interests unapologetically.

And with the body discomfort, personally, I found that working out really really helped me. I love being strong and being seen as such. I love putting effort into myself and walking comfortably in my skin from taking care of myself in that way. Even if I'm wearing baggy clothes (which is the majority of the time) and no one can see how I actually look underneath, there's an odd comfort in my skin.

Speaking to a lot of people, I've found that there's this discomfort in self that is so deeply ingrained through no fault of their own that, at its root, is a societally ingrained perception of gender.

I've been asked hundreds of times, 'what is a woman?', I even attended a conference where this question was addressed at one point. And I discovered that it didn't matter how comfortable or uncomfortable in their own skin the woman was, everybody's answer differed. And from that, I've mentally broken down the construct of what a woman is, because nobody bloody knows, or at least, there is no one shared definition.

So, to me, I am a woman. What that means for me is I'm biologically a certain way. Outside of that? How I express myself? Whatever, that's just personal preference. If today I'm wearing a dress that barely goes past my ass and shows so much cleavage a good christian woman is clutching her pearls, and tomorrow I'm rocking the baggiest outfit ever, it doesn't mean I was more feminine one day and more masc the next, I was just going with what's comfortable. There is no gender involved there. I just am. On paper, I'm a female. What that means? I don't know. I don't even know if it has much significance other than medically and how I take care of my body and providing it with what it needs to stay healthy.

That's gender for me.

I don't know if this was useful or just came across as a rant.

But yeah, figure out the why. Is it you, or a subconcious need to feel a certain way because of external factors? Play around, find what makes you feel like you. Don't worry about anyone else. They don't have to be you. Only you have to experience yourself all the time, so you deserve to be happy being you in whichever way makes you comfortable in your skin.

[ritzcuit]

been thinking abt #gender again lately Cus i keep forgetting im not transitioning LMFAOOO ITS SO!!! FUNNY IDK WHAT IM DOINGGG Im just fucking around if we're being real. but ppl dont like it when you say that. theyre like no you need a god honest legal legitimate Paladin-esque reason to be doing crazy shit to your body. so i have to be like (gets on one knee) i reject my womanhood. Which i do. but like.

if i collect all the ppl whove inspired me to fuck around w gender it's all women in drag if im being honest LOLLL Like drag kings. like women crossdressing. Which is maybe still touchy for some people....

the legitimate way of saying this is "i'm gender nonconforming" which is true + how i feel + what i say, or for medical reasons i say i'm nonbinary (which gets flattened to transmasc because medicine is hell) but like...i just say im a gnc butch... Cus i am. that's the legit reason...

but its funny.... like ... my idols were jo calderone (lady gaga's drag king persona) and like. Ryuutaro tgaa. LMFAOOO. HELPPP.... i was watching someone stream tgaa and one of their friends was surely a nonbinary person and the person streaming was like [name] she's your character you voice her. and i was like man i want that for me. Which is a very roundabout way of getting there....

it's all practical reasons... i want a deeper voice bc i had NO range and voice acting made me so jealous. i want body hair cus its hot. i want facial hair cus i wanna see what id look like with it... i wanted to see if i even could grow it lol. i want top surgery bc my boobs are huge and i never opted into having them. Like it's just practical reasons.... all of these things i don't specify, i just say oh i have dysphoria/euphoria. Bc the health industry is not ready for nuanced discussions of gender in the slightest. so i have to tell half truths or obscure truth in order to get what i need...

its just interesting... so funny growing up around transmed/truscum tumblr (not actively in it, thankfully, but internalizing their rhetoric) and then as an adult im like Ohhhh wait my body is my own + i can do what i want forever + genderweird butches are eternal

But blah i think abt it cus when ppl talk abt gender and theyre like, oh men do this, girls do that, and somehow they still try to be like, trans inclusive, but they still try to shove you in a binary ANYWAY, and even though i am still cis-ish (my friend says cis+ and its so funny to me) its like. well no cus ive been unpacking my identity and trying new things and now this box doesnt work for even me, a reasonably somewhat cisgender person. like. The whole framework is fucked....